#i've read a lot of fantasy as well and this is a surprisingly one of the most nuanced and complex and mature ways i've seen racism depicted

[theclearblue]

I was told by a friend that Fishman Island was one of the worst arcs in One Piece, and now I have really really high expectations for the new world cause um. This is a really strong first half and the Fisher Tiger and Otohime flashback was so good and such an amazing moment for Nami?? Y'all are sleeping on this arc.

[creepyscritches]

I spend so much time reading medical journals that reading social/anthropological journals feels like playing a gameboy

[tlonista]

A whole mess of Astarion hurt/comfort fanfic recs

OK fine I've read so much Astarion hurt/comfort-adjacent fic that I should really put together an incomplete rec list. Be warned that with Astarion's canon backstory there's a lot of abuse and assault references of varying explicitness, so check the AO3 tags. I'm also limiting myself to one fic per author because otherwise I'd end up with several pages of Asidian and FlowerCitti. In case you're wondering, my personal contribution to the field is Seducere.

Ongoing Fics:

innocence died screaming by FlowerCitti

Comprehensive pre- and in-canon Astarion character study. Contains possibly the most heartwrenching post-Astarion-locked-tomb-era turn I've ever read. Very good.

Another Path by Asidian

A sweet Wyllstarion monster hunter x monster no-tadpole AU in which Astarion gets captured/rescued by Wyll straight out of a year in a coffin and navigates basic human kindness for the first time in a couple centuries.

Seen by ayvaines

Modern Bloodweave AU where Cazador is Astarion's cruel, controlling boyfriend and Gale is the kind D&D GM who's hosting them both in a game. As makes sense for a modern AU, it's a more-understated-than-canon take on Astarion coming to terms with the fact that he's in an abusive relationship, working out his feelings about Cazador through tabletop roleplaying, including some clever scenes dealing with the bleed of intense RPG sessions.

Heartbeats by LadyRagnelle

Canon-divergent Durgestarion fic where Astarion was recaptured by his siblings, memory-wiped, and then rescued by a team of companions he no longer remembers. A lot of well-executed (and sometimes surprisingly funny) angst around Astarion, charlatan that he is, trying to pretend he hasn't forgotten absolutely everything including how to be a non-level-1 rogue and have friends.

The stars began to burn by peregrinefeathers

Gale is trapped in fantasy nullspace and gets Astarion free of Cazador's clutches, after which they navigate an odd-couple relationship while trying to kill Cazador and pull Gale back into the physical world. Another classic "Astarion learns what human decency is" no-tadpole AU.

Memoir by IzzyIzGay

An Interview with the Vampire-style fic in which Astarion tells Gale about his time under Cazador, playing with that series' trademark unreliable narration and an unusually literal version of Cazador's creepy family dynamic.

Starved by neo7v

A modern non-magical Bloodweave AU featuring Astarion and the lonely degradation of a precarious service industry job! Only a few chapters so far, but seriously, it takes the "vampiric starvation" theme in a direction that's very mundane and miserable and compelling and it's one of my favorite recently started fics.

Unexpected Guests by Erandir

Another "get loved and cared for, sucker" no-tadpole AU featuring a non-Tav druid OC taking care of a lost Astarion who's escaped Baldur's Gate. Astarion and druids, the perfect foil.

Through The Night Dark And Drear by JJJSchmidt

Astarion is accidentally bargained off to an archfey by Cazador and taken to the palace of infuriatingly confusing fair folk magic! There's still a lot of story left to be uncovered, but I love the worldbuilding and fairy-tale premise.

snare by parsnipit

A Halstarion fic where Astarion never got tadpoled and the gang ends up rescuing him from Cazador, post-game, with his compulsions very much intact. Which leads naturally to hissing wet cat Astarion reluctantly learning to trust Halsin while they plot to take down Cazador.

One-Shots:

Quick Step by starkraving

starkraving's another person who could have made up a big chunk of this list, and this character study plays really well on the classic "how the hell does Astarion know how to be a rogue anyway" fandom conversation. My favorite entry in a good and growing series of Astarion-centered fics.

Gifts by Feena_c

Astarion gets caught by Cazador before the confrontation at the palace. Impeccable "Cazador doesn't realize Astarion didn't just come back to Baldur's Gate, he came back loved" vibe, as Cazador tries to break Astarion by taking away the gifts the tadpole gang gave him along the way.

What is Affection but the Absence of Cruelty by Aztec24

One of my favorite tropes is "Astarion tortures himself by obsessively imagining how awful these perfectly nice people will be to him," and this very much delivers. Featuring a rare two-Tavs-plus-Astarion throuple!

The Mimic by ForsakenFlyingCircus

This is really hurt-no-comfort, but I'm including it because it's a good super sad take on dehumanization with an awful Tav confirming all the worst things Astarion thinks about himself and the world, touching on the whole problem of sentient monsters in D&D.

Peel the scars from off my back by WitchyBee

A Spawn Family fic in the aftermath of Astarion getting Cazador's contract on his back - lots of antagonistic but grudgingly caring sibling interaction and Astarion being satisfyingly ambivalent about it all.

Complete Multi-Chapter Fic:

Just A Taste by NightmareGiraffe

The tadpole gang gets imprisoned at Moonrise Towers and Astarion accepts an offer from Araj Oblodra in exchange for their freedom. A very dark yet totally in-character elaboration on the canon blood merchant encounter, plus a cool dragonborn Tav.

The Accountant’s Guide to Taking Down an Evil Vampire Lord (and maybe bagging Astarion while you are at it) by Cinnamontails

A charming f!OC-who-isn't-Tav/Astarion longfic that combines hurt/comfort with het romance novel conventions, which I feel like is rarely pulled off.

And I know there's a ton I missed here -- god this fandom is big.

[fahye]

book recs: oct/nov 2023

I read an obscene number of books during my weeks travelling in the USA, so here are some highlights!

A GENTLEMAN UNDONE by cecilia grant - I actually read all three in this excellent series, but this is the highlight. a tense, engrossing regency romance between a gentleman desperate to make money in gambling halls and the woman who teaches him to count cards, who unfortunately happens to be someone else's mistress. extremely horny and very smart.

SHADOW MAGIC by jaida jones & danielle bennett - after HAVEMERCY I desperately needed the rest of the series, and happily I had dinner with jaida and dani and was given them! this one is classic political fantasy: assassins, ambassadors, a devoted bodyguard and his beautiful prince, and a flamboyant little chaos magician who wonders why nobody else in his delegation is enjoying the beautiful local Fashion Robes. this book has never had a heterosexual thought in its entire life.

AMERICAN QUEEN by sierra simone - okay, this is a rec for the entire series (AMERICAN PRINCE & AMERICAN KING follow), a modern arthur-lancelot-guinevere retelling where they're american politicians and they're all in love and kinky and fucked up about it. mostly smut, lots of angst, occasional plot. maybe the hottest thing I've ever read in my life?? damn, sierra simone knows what she's doing.

THE MOON IS A HARSH MISTRESS by robert a. heinlein - what if we were a moon colony and we decided to stage a revolutionary war and we asked a bored AI computer to run the logistics for us? I'm such a sucker for logistics, and heinlein delivers in spades. very funny, great worldbuilding, fun characters. has aged surprisingly well, I think.

10 THINGS THAT NEVER HAPPENED by alexis hall - a pure shot of gay grumpy/sunshine delivered via FAKE AMNESIA TROPE and a plot lovingly and lampshadily borrowed from the classic sandra bullock vehicle while you were sleeping. alexis hall's protagonists and glorious supporting casts always grab me, and this was no exception.

THE FALL THAT SAVED US by tamara jerée - do you like the good omens setup of bookshop angel vs. snarky demon, destined to be enemies but oh no we're in love, and you'd like to add some recovery from family trauma + sex scenes + also they're sapphic? yes. good. enjoy.

CHAIN-GANG ALL-STARS by nana kwame adjei-brenyah - holy shit!! finished this one yesterday and will be thinking about it for a long time. premise: criminals can choose to compete in deadly televised gladiator matches instead of remaining in prison. this is an absolutely brutal examination of the prison industrial complex and the violent commodification of bodies (especially bodies of colour) under our capitalist hellscape. lyrical, wonderful, cutting. very queer and very angry. I flew through it. what a fantastic book.

[lailoken]

What are your favorite pieces of media that you think accurately represent magic and spirit work? Movies, books, even music..

This is an interesting question, but one that requires a lot of thought, as I have read and watched an inordinate amount of books and movies. Plus, even really good fiction with pagan themes that I've read/watched is generally inaccurate in most ways, with some realistic aspects of magic woven in here and there. Some of my very favorite media relating to the subject can't really be included, simply because of how inaccurate it is overall, but there are a few that have caught my notice.

I'm sure I'll end up missing ones, which bugs me, but I'll do my best to recount some examples that I can think of:

The Love Witch (2016) is a movie that I think presents a strikingly realistic portrayal of what magic can look like. It manages to show some of the ways one might use magic to great effect, without actually skewing into fantasy at all. Clearly, the magic shown isn't going to line up with every paradigm, and its not exactly a heady or spirit-based story, but I think it's a very real look at how ritual and magic is/can be approached by many folks in the modern day.

The Witch (2015) is, above all else, a great slow-burn horror film and an excellent period-piece. However, it also portrays quite an accurate conception of folkloric beliefs about Witchcraft in the 17th century, which inexorably inform the realities of modern Witchcraft traditions. It does just barely skew into fantasy horror, but the actual folkloric information being presented is quite sound.

A Dark Song (2016) is a film that portrays ceremonial magic realistically in many ways. Ultimately, it is still a supernatural horror film, but the bulk of the magic in the movie is based directly on the Abramelin Operation, which was interesting to see. A lot of the ways that the magic "takes shape" in the film feels real enough to me, too (though it certainly takes it to extremes at points, as horror movies are wont to do).

We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson is a horror novel I much enjoyed when I read it a coulple years ago, but I also remember that it happens to contain small, but meaningful, instances of sympathetic magic within the story that I appreciated as a practitioner looking in. This one has been made into a movie as well.

Cunning Folk by Adam Nevill is one of the more realistic looks at magic—including the uncanny side of it—that I've come across. It's still definitely a horror story, first and foremost, but there's an oomph to the ritual and magic described therein that a lot of other similar fiction lacks—even when the ritual act being described isn't necessarily accurate in terms of historicality or my personal experience of the Craft.

The White People by Arthur Machen is a Welsh short horror story from the turn of the century, which I think is worth including here. There are elements and aspects of the story that feel surprisingly real in terms of Gloaming initiation and the Gloaming Spirits—though, of course, it takes creative liberties informed by the paranormal beliefs and trends of the time (1890s).

The Craft (1996) is a movie that I'm sure a lot of pagans have of nostalgia for in one way or another, myself included. I struggled with whether this movie should be here or in the Honorable Mention section, but I included it here in the end because a lot of the ways magic and ritual are presented in the film are accurate enough. I also think it did a fairly good job of capturing how it can feel to discover, revel in, and then become overwhelmed by magic. However, since it is a supernatural horror film, a lot of magic shown is portrayed more fantastically than the real thing, and there are aspects of the magic (rituals, entities, etc.) made up entirely for the sake of the story.

As implied above, there are also some pieces that, while largely inaccurate or too far into the realm of fantasy, still manage to succesfully capture some essence of realistic feeling magic in them. I will list those here as Honorable Mentions:

Practical Magic (1998) is another movie that I'm sure a lot of Pagans have nostalgia for in some way or another. I won't claim that it's a genuinely "accurate" representation of magic—and it certainly strays into outright fantasy at times—but there are little things throughout the movie that managed to ring a bell for me, as someone who grew up with magic in my family. I know this was originally a book, but I actually haven't read that as of yet, so I can't speak to it.

Pan's Labyrinth (2006) is a movie is squarely in the fantasy-horror genre to me, but even still, I include it here as an honorable mention because a lot of the lore depicted is drawn from real lore, and the overall ambience it manged to evoke strongly reminds me of some of my own experiences with chthonic journeying.

The Good Witch franchise isn't one I have ever actually watched any part of before, but I include it here because, oddly enough, multiple practitioners have mentioned to me that they think the magic is surprisingly realistic for a Hallmark series. As I understand it, the main character is a sort of local Wise Woman who helps the folk in her little town using things like folk-knowledge, remarkable intuition, and an uncanny ability to seemingly sway people and circumstances. Since I haven't seen it myself, my take on it may be somewhat lacking, (which is why I listed it as an honorable mention), but based on the description, it actually sounds like it may be one of the more realistic interpretations of magic on this list.

I know this is a strange addition, as it's not exactly magic, per se, but much of how Stephen King writes about psychic abilities like clairvoyance and healing throughout his works manages to touch on something all too familiar for me. I think, sometimes, that he may have known someone with the Sight and/or the Touch in his real life, as it comes up a lot in one shape or another in his writing.

As I said, I'm sure there's stuff I'm missing, but this at least a serviceable overview. I encourage others to share any other media that they think deserves a mention, too!

[moonclade]

Hey! Doing good I hope?

I’ll make this request quick, I was thinking of a Percy x Melinoe!reader? Since her mother is known as a minor goddess of nightmares and ghosts, people are either afraid of her or doesn’t care about her that much. She even hangs out with ghosts more than people, but of course, dear ol’ Percy is curious of her and tries to befriend her? You know, a good strangers to lovers. Is this good? If not, just tell me so I can fix it!

note ― i'm so rusty when it comes to writing about pjo but i really hope i did well with this! (also sorry it took so long, i wasn't able to work on it for a week). i didn't want to make this like 20k words long, so i didn't really include the bridge from acquaintances to lovers

not proofread || lowercase intended & lots of use of the word "you"

1.5k words

the sun smiles as it burns your skin, and you scowl as the blinding rays make it unbearable for you to even stare ahead. as usual, you were wandering around camp, attempting to find something to do.

you really didn't know why you bothered. considering the fact that you always reverted to your normal routine of finding a bench and reading. and if you were lucky enough to find a shaded and secluded spot, you might even have someone to talk to.

that someone being whatever spirit would bother entertaining you. obviously not any of the other demigods, as majority of them never tried befriending you or were simply scared of the fact you were the daughter of such a "dark" goddess. of course, a few of the other campers didn't mind your family and your abilities, such as nico di angelo. the two of you weren't close, but he always acknowledged you whenever you would lock eyes. he was definitely your favorite at camp.

you never understood why people were scarfed of you just because of your mom. it was laughable honestly, and it led you to have a slight resentment for everyone who actively avoided you. daughter of a goddess of nightmares and ghosts, being invisible and feared by everyone. very ironic.

being alone took a while to get used to, but you eventually made it work out, opting for the quiet whispers of the long-passed spirits. they never judged you, although a few definitely make fun of your isolation.

not finding any activity to do, you decided to read a book you were itching to finish instead of conversing with your little clique of ghosts. your eyes lit up as you found the perfect spot to sit, away from prying eyes and the harsh beams of sunlight.

making yourself comfortable, you found your marked page and started where you left off, ready to finally get this book out the way and start a new one.

suddenly, a blocky figure blocks the sparse amount of light you were using to read. you look up to see, surprisingly, percy jackson.

you were confused and a bit intrigued. you've never interacted with him, but you always admired him from afar. he was a role model to you, both socially and when it comes to slaying monsters.

you would never admit you studied him thoroughly, usually in the light of the campfire, watching as he would crack a joke and then burst into a grin and let out a hearty laugh.

you were definitely jealous of him. that's all.

"i've seen you around camp. (name), right?" he questioned.

a nod was all he received. you looked around for the inevitable group of campers laughing at this interaction, but you saw none. relaxing a little, you lock eyes with his striking sea-colored ones.

"i'm bad with words." you respond, shaking your head. you avert your gaze back to the book you were reading. a romance, and an undeniably cliche one at that.

you loved reading about things that weren't commonplace in your life, like fantasy, but especially romance. everyone was too scared of you for you to even imagine about having a relationship or a love life in general. every crush that developed in your heart was quickly stowed away until it eventually died off.

"it's alright. i never see you talking to anyone around camp." he takes a seat on the bench, a reasonable distance away from you that it wouldn't seem he was uncomfortable with you, like most campers, but not close enough to make it awkward for you.

"never have to, everyone too terrified of my "sinister aura" and prowess in war. and also, my mom." you slightly joke, not wanting him to pity you or something along those lines. he tilted his head like he was going to say something in response to your slightly self-deprecating statement.

"you talk like a book." he blurted. you didn't know if you should take that as a compliment, but even with the short time you've talked with percy, you knew he wouldn't mean it as an insult. just a weirdly phrased statement.

"y'know, in a poetic way." he sheepishly rubbed his neck as you stared at him. the corners of your lips upturned, and he calmed down a little knowing that you didn't take offense.

"you talk a lot," you counter. "but in a good way."

he returns a smile and notices the book you had been slowly inching away from his view.

"what's that about?"

oh my gods. you weren't getting out this one.

"it's just a little romance," you rub your wrists awkwardly, hoping he wouldn't ask for a more in-depth answer.

but the gods were not in your favor today.

"but what is it about?" he quirked an eyebrow at your unwillingness to elaborate on the plot.

"it's just about a boy and a girl meeting randomly and they slowly fall in love at a summer camp. really cliche and probably boring to you." the book made it into his hands as he scanned the front cover art, not bothering to open the book and attempt to read it, thankfully. you could guess why though.

"at a summer camp?"

"i like reading about stuff that could be relatable to me," you shrugged.

"well is it relatable?" he seemed interested.

"do you always ask so many questions?" you grumble. "and no, not really. do you think i have a love life here?"

every answer was turning into a question, followed by another question.

he looked you up and down and smirked. "you don't?"

you swipe your book back and roll your eyes. "yes, jackson. you do realize i have more ghost friends than living ones, right?"

"adds on to the charm. now, tell me more about what happens in the book."

you groan outwardly, but on the inside, you were giddy at finally being able to talk to someone, especially percy.

giving in, you begin to go off on the plot and major events in the story, and your opinions on characters.

before the two of you knew it, the sun was already cut in half by the horizon and the sky was a flurry of colors slowly being overtaken by the dark blues and blacks of the evening.

"how about we meet here again tomorrow?" percy asks.

you were already warming up to the son of poseidon. it could be because you haven't talked to another human in a long time, or he had that vibe to him that let you feel safe.

sometimes you would go and hang out with him and his group, but you didn't know for sure if they liked you that much. it took you months to even decide if percy himself considered you a friend or not.

majority of time you'd go back to that same bench you met him at, and if he was free, he'd meet you there and the two of you would talk about how the book you were reading was going or just how life was going.

but the bench wasn't the only place you hung out. percy would invite you to spar with him or walk around camp, or take part in events going around camp. slowly but surely, more people warmed up to you as they noticed the bond you and percy had. you were still wary and apprehensive of those people though, knowing they judged you even though they didn't know you. but it was a welcome change.

it was half past noon, and you make your way over to your and percy's rendezvous point to hang out for the day. the battered wooden bench that was now carved with quotes and drawings that spanned the seat.

you didn't have to even wait a minute, percy jogging up to you with a hand behind his back.

"what're you hiding?" you try and peer over his shoulder but he moves the object out of your sight.

"well," he looks around everywhere but you, before taking in a big breath and finally meeting your gaze. "i really like you!" he shows you the assortment of flowers most likely picked from the forest nearby.

you process his statement. the percy jackson likes you? never in a thousand years would you have thought that someone could have a crush on you, but never ever would you have dreamed of percy liking you.

it was like your life was turned upside down ever since you met him. you managed to finally have someone to talk to, and also get people to stop fearing you. and it was all because of him. he was the saint in your life.

"hey, it's alright if you don't like me bac-" you cut him off quickly by pressing your lips on his. sure you weren't an experienced kisser, but you've read enough to know how to shut him up.

he went from stiff in surprise to leaning into the kiss, the bouquet long forgotten on the ground. you couldn't get enough of him, throwing your arms around his shoulders and bringing him closer. he slipped his hands around your waist, a shiver running down your back at the touch.

he pulled away, and you clung onto him, not wanting his warmth to leave you.

after a moment of bated breath, you piped up.

"i love you too, percy."

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

reading update: March 2024

March was so !!!!!! so fucking long, but that means that I got to read a lot of books - more than I did in January or February. they're pretty all over the place in terms of quality, but I think they're also all going to be pretty memorable in one way or another. shall we discuss?

what have I been reading?

The Ballad of Perilous Graves (Alex Jennings, 2022) - I bought this novel at Crescent City Books in New Orleans last June, then tucked it away to wait for exactly the right moment. and I'm so glad I did, because it was a gorgeous little flash of NOLA in the middle of a gray midwestern winter funk. this novel is so, SO steeped in celebrating the art, history, and culture of New Orleans, creating a version of the city filled with talking animals, living songs, and moving graffiti that hardly even feels that different than the real New Orleans. and in this book, Nola is distinct from New Orleans; there's some interesting multiverse stuff going on in the city that might be really interesting to my fellow fans of Dimension 20's Unsleeping City and N.K. Jemisin's City We Became. not every part of the book totally worked for me: the parts of the books following the kids - the titular Perilous "Perry" Graves and company - are definitely the strongest, and the actual details of how the plot got resolved got a little muddled for me before the surprisingly abrupt end. but! it must be said that the vibes are immaculate, and vibes will get you really far with me. I want to see a thousand more stories set in this world.

Thank You For Sharing (Rachel Runya Katz, 2023) - with god as my witness this was one of the most boring romance novels I've ever read, and that's saying something considering I literally just read Red String Theory. what I really adore are romances that take place at around an 11 on a scale of 1-10, under circumstances where absolutely no normal person should even be able to contemplate fucking but our protagonists power through because they're horny to a degree that renders them clinically unwell. this book was hovering somewhere around a 2; it's literally just two adults having jobs and hanging out in pretty mundane circumstances. the only thing that really strains my belief is that an otherwise well-adjusted woman is still upset about something that happened at summer camp over a decade ago, but I guess if she wasn't mad about something then the protagonists wouldn't be able to have a conversation about their feelings to show off how good they are at therapy speak.

Africa Is Not a Country: Notes on a Bright Continent (Dipo Faloyin, 2022) - genuinely one of the most excellent pieces of nonfiction that I've read in a hot minute. Faloyin's book consists of interconnected essays that just dazzlingly brilliant, in turns solemn, sardonic, and sly, always ready to offer the audience a little wink as it subverts expectations. Faloyin walks the reader through the history of several African countries, from colonial looting to rocky political regimes to the common tropes that plague modern media with depictions of Africa as universally backwards, impoverished, and struggling. I really felt like I was *learning* while I was reading this book and learning the specifics of so many places that are often portrayed as interchangeable in American media. I really sincerely can't recommend this enough, it's an excellent read.

That Time I Got Drunk and Saved a Demon (Kimberly Lemming, 2024) - I can't in good conscience say that I enjoyed this book, but it is kind of a great read if you enjoy updating your housemates on the latest bullshit in your horny fantasy romance. Lemming's in a weird middle ground where she's putting a lot of effort into the backstory of the world that justifies our protagonist (who's named CINNAMON HOTPEPPER!!!!) meeting and hooking up with a demon (who's also a dragon, because all monsters are just a subspecies of demon. I'm not crazy about that but the worst part by far is definitely that his dragon form has hair) but also stops giving a shit about it the second it's not necessary. like (spoilers) but all of the human characters are REALLY chill about finding out that the goddess they've been worshipping for CENTURIES is actually an evil lich? and there's another human character who pretty casually watches the city where she's spent her entire life get razed to the ground by monsters with absolutely zero remorse, which is genuinely bananas. also this book misses SOOOO many opportunities to be really nasty horny because it's so focused on hyping up Cinnamon and Fallon's all-consuming five day spiral into unhinged magical demon marriage. even the "light bondage" promised in the content warning was disappointing; the emphasis was definitely more on the "light" than the "bondage." what does a bitch have to do to find a decent monsterfucker book. for the love of god please.

It Came From the Closet: Queer Reflections on Horror (ed. Joe Vallese, 2022) - I've heard a lot of hype about this book, an anthology of queer writers musing about the queerness that draws them to the horror genre. I was expecting the essays to be of an analytical nature, but it turns out they're much more personal. that's not necessarily a bad thing, but some of these essays ended up falling SUPER flat for me, with weak analogies that felt like the result of authors remembering at the last second that they were supposed to be relating their life to a horror movie somehow. which isn't to say that there weren't high points as well, but overall the collection was low lows and medium highs for me.

Sex Criminals Volume One: One Weird Trick (Matt Fraction and Chip Zdarsky, 2014) - I'm trying so hard to remember to read comics that aren't 30 year old Batman stories, and my friend Emily lent this to me months ago when I helped them move, so it seemed like high time to get around to checking out Sex Criminals. the premise is fun! what if time stopped when you had an orgasm? then what if you met someone else with the same ability and the two of you could have sex and run around in a time-stopped world together? and then what if you robbed banks? and I'm a huge fan of that. the writing isn't the most gripping thing in the world, and now that it's a decade old I find that it feels very emblematic of the kind of aggressively offbeat, Whedon-ish writing style that felt like it was really unavoidable in the 2010s, which I can't say has aged MAGNIFICENTLY for me. but I'm willing to read more, see where this series goes, and give it the chance to really win me over. stay tuned for Volume Two!

Rental Person Who Does Nothing (Shoji Morimoto, trans. Don Knotting 2023) - I can't decide if I want to sit Morimoto down for dinner to pick his brain or just skip the niceties and put his brain in a jar to study it, but either way this guy definitely has something fascinating going on. tl;dr: in this memoir Morimoto recounts his experiences using Twitter to let other people hire him out as a person who will do nothing. "doing nothing" covers all kinds of things: accompanying people to eat a meal that they felt too self-conscious to eat alone, keeping someone company so they don't get distracted while they should be working, or waving goodbye to a stranger at a train station. he's not paid for this, either, or at least doesn't charge a fixed rate; all the Morimoto asks for is the price of his train ticket to meet clients, who sometimes buy him extra gifts as a thank you. there are so many FASCINATING ideas presented in this book about work and value and interpersonal connection, and yet the book clocks in at under 200 pages. Morimoto isn't here to tell you how to feel about anything he's done, only to present some experiences and let you unravel the meaning for yourself. and I guess that's sort of brilliant. throughout the memoir he's adamant that Rental Person doesn't offer advice or tell anyone what to do, offering only basic responses when prompted. telling someone else what to think or attempting to offer up any wisdom gleaned from his rental work would count as doing something, wouldn't it? I really recommend checking it out for yourself and deciding what you think, especially if you're in a slump seeking something quick, engaging, and easy to read.

[profiterole-reads]

2023 Favourites

In no particular order. This is content I've read and watched in 2023, not necessarily content released in 2023.

Books

1. Notorious Sorcerer by Davinia Evans: fantasy with some m/m. The protagonist travels to other planes for alchemical ingredients and ends up having to learn greater workings. I love the Byzantine vibe of the worldbuilding.

2. The Daughters of Izdihar by Hadeer Elsbai: fantasy with some f/f. Two women, a waterweaver and an earthweaver, join a women's rights movement. I love the Egyptian-inspired worldbuilding.

3. Reforged by Seth Haddon: m/m fantasy. This King/Paladin novel has a surprising plot. The magic system is very original as well, I especially like the music part of it.

4. The Buried and the Bound by Rochelle Hassan: urban fantasy with some m/m (YA). The hedgewitch protecting the town teams up with a boy cursed to forget his true love and another one trapped as a bondservant.

5. [Spanish] Lazos de Sangre by LR Jeffers: m/m urban fantasy (erotica). This is a series about werewolves and big cat shifters, usually angsty and hot.

6. [French] Meute by Karine Rennberg: urban fantasy with some m/m + another protagonist is aroace and uses sign language. This is a novel about building your own werewolf pack. I think this is my first time encountering 2nd-person narration in French and it works surprisingly well.

7. Cascade by Rachel A. Rosen: science fantasy with mlm and wlw protagonists + no romance. An ecological disaster has freed magic. In Canada, the Party works with a wizard in order to try and save humanity. I love the intricacies of the plot, which skilfully mixes politics, science and magic.

8. Ocean's Echo by Everina Maxwell: m/m science fiction. Telepathy, my favourite trope, done by one of my fave authors! It was even better than I expected.

9. The Deep Sky by Yume Kitasei: science fiction/murder mystery with several non-binary major characters. 80 people from all around the world embark on a one-way interstellar voyage. As they're all required to get pregnant, they're obviously afab, but several are non-binary, with mentions of a trans man.

10. Forget Me Not by Alyson Derrick: f/f romance (YA). This is a very romantic novel about two girls dating in secret until one gets amnesia. I enjoy this trope a lot.

TV shows

1. Good Omens: fantasy with queer protagonists + some f/f. I love the book and I love the adaptation. Season 2 is original content, but it's faithful to the spirit of the novel.

2. Shadow and Bone: fantasy with some m/m (YA). This successfully mixes the Shadow and Bone trilogy (that I haven't read) and the Six of Crows duology (that I have read and enjoyed).

3. Warrior Nun: fantasy with some f/f. Nuns literally fight against demons.

4. The Power: superpower fiction with some f/f + a trans woman and an intersex man. Teenage girls start developing an electrical superpower, which makes them safer from men.

5. Nü Er Hong: GL wuxia. This c-drama is a quick watch, with 27 episodes of 2 minutes. I love that these short webdramas always have more or less the same actresses.

6. The Devil Judge: dystopia/thriller with BL vibes. This k-drama has a tight plot and fascinating characters. There's a girl in a wheelchair and the rep is well done.

7. Naughty Babe: BL romance/murder (attempt) mystery. This Thai drama is the sequel to Cutie Pie, except that they switched up the main pairing and the secondary pairing. I think it's possible to watch it on its own.

8. Wedding Plan: BL + GL romcom. This Thai drama has mlm-wlw solidarity, which I hope to see more of in the future. There are also cameos from the BL couples from Love in the Air.

9. Oh! My Assistant: BL romcom. This hilarious k-drama is about a het porn webtoon creator and his assistant. Despite this topic, the drama is not explicit.

10. Welcome to the Lesbian Bar: GL contemporary fiction. This k-drama is a quick watch, with 5 episodes of 6 minutes. In each episode, 2 customers come have a drink and chat with the owner.

Movies

1. Barbie: fantasy that is so gender! This was such a big surprise coming from Hollywood.

2. Nimona: fantasy with a protagonist who is a trans/enby allegory + some m/m (YA). I haven't read the graphic novel, so this was more depressing than I expected (it deals a lot with discrimination), but still an excellent movie.

3. Wingwomen (Voleuses in the original French): action movie with a sapphic protagonist + f/f vibes between the other two. I love heist movies all about women.

4. Kill Bok-soon: action movie with some f/f. This Korean movie has interesting cinematography. Note that it's very violent, though.

5. Red, White & Royal Blue: m/m romcom. I love the book and I love the adaptation.

6. Anything's Possible: m/f romance with a trans female protagonist (YA). This is a very positive movie, about love, art and nature.

7. Fanfic: m/m romance with a trans male protagonist (YA). This Polish movie is sometimes dark, sometimes fun.

[yesmissnyx]

How foo ppl find a dom like am i looking the wrong way😭

My Brother (gender neutral) in Kink, this is literally one of the top-most asked questions in the community. You are not alone in your search!

We Dom[mes] aren't nearly as plentiful as subs, in my experience, so there aren't as many to go around. Also, there can be a lot of bad eggs, so it makes good ones even harder to find.

BUT, I will also say, that good subs can ALSO be hard to find, and it's surprisingly easy to set yourself apart when looking for a Dom[me].

My biggest pieces of advice for beginners:

One: KNOW YOUR SHIT. Be knowledgeable about kink. Research. Read community posts (like on Reddit) and well-recommended books on kink. Most (good) Dom[mes] I know are into kink as both a sex thing AND a hobby. We're nerds about it. Learn how to talk about it as a fellow kink nerd, and we'll be at least a little enticed ;)

Two: GET INVOLVED IN THE COMMUNITY. Whether in real life or online, get to know other kinksters. Make friends. They will introduce you to their friends. I know this can be tough, depending on where you live and your extroversion levels, but I swear it can be a good way to naturally meet people. Not only will you have a support network of people who Get It if a relationship goes south, but it can filter out abusive assholes.

Three: KNOW WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR. Explore your fantasies by yourself. Daydream. Fantasize. Experiment and explore. This is a more introspective version of "KNOW YOUR SHIT." I've always appreciated subs who know what THEY like, know THEIR limits, and aren't afraid to negotiate. This can also help you express your needs/kinks to prospective not-exclusively-kinky partners, if you're looking for a life-partner who is willing to take on the role of a Dom[me]!

Four: BE RESPECTFUL AND WORK ON YOURSELF. This should REALLY be a no-brainer, but so many subs are pushy little shits with terrible boundaries and people skills. Don't just message a stranger all like "wah wah step on me 🥺 look at my penis" while bringing literally nothing else to the table. At best, you might get someone horny to sext with. At worst, you might get literally scammed.

Dom[mes] aren't kink dispensers. Nor are we therapists. Remember this.

We're people--just like you!--who want to have fun, interesting and gratifying relationships with compatible people. Work on your people skills. Work on your mental health. Work on your confidence and becoming a well-rounded person. Work on becoming the best version of yourself you can be.

Honestly, a lot of this just works are general relationship advice, because at the end of the day, being a mature, interesting, respectful person who can communicate your needs is extremely sexy and desirable ;)

Hopefully this is helpful to some of you out there looking for a Dom[me]! Good luck on your search!

[liesmyth]

What is wheel of time and should I start it tomorrow?

you SHOULD.

Wheel of Time is an epic fantasy series by the late Robert Jordan. It's epic in scope, in length, and in its insanely large cast of characters. It's fascinating. The worldbuilding is insane, but also familiar (partly because it relies on widespread fantasy tropes, partly because it made many of those tropes popular for many books published later). The characters are exasperating but deeply human; I love SO many of them and appreciate so many others. It's very Of Its Time in some regards, especially re: its handling of gender roles and sexuality, but it's also surprisingly progressive and queer in intent even when the execution falters, and I really appreciate a lot that it even tried to Go There, because it was Very formative for me as a young teen. It's also one of those books where you can see the author's kinks all over the place (both narrative and otherwise) and tbh? it's a bit cringe but lots of fun. Also it’s very well written; the plot is as Epic as epic fantasy gets but it’s really the character moments that make the reader invested in the story. I just love it a lot, ngl.

Fun fact: I am now today on tumblr dot com, blogging in english, because sometimes around age 15 even though I fucking hated english class in school I just couldn’t wait for the latest books to come out in my country so I had to become fluent enough to read a 700-pages novel by myself. THAT is the grip this series had on me.

Some things I am now into because of reading WoT starting at age eleven.

codependent magical bonds with loyalty kink thrown in (if you’re familiar with TLT, think necro/cav but usually f/m. Not always though :) )

femdom. both F/f and F/m varieties

Propesized Savior trying to kill their humanity to become a figure larger than history (before realizing that's bullshit)

what if monastic(ish) order of sole women but also we had sex about it

unfortunately. a lot of weird kinks. I will elaborate on request but it’s better if I don’t right off the bat.

no, I lied. It wasn’t unfortunate. I appreciate it when authors are brave enough to let the banner of their id fly high

ruined civilizations and newer, less advanced civilizations rising from the wreckage. the collective understanding that you live in a post-apocalypse world. old scientific principles becoming magic

confronting your alternate dimension self, as a treat

dream sex

devil-may-care rogues who actually care a lot

alien morality, or cultural differences so big that they fundamentally are the same thing

people who are SO Wrong about everything but are 100% committed to their own personal moral code

whatever the fuck Mat’s luck had going on

“I know what my destiny is but I say: fuck you”

I can’t stress enough how many of my kinks (narrative; sexy in fiction only; sexy in RL) came directly from this series. Like, I know I’ve already said that but putting together this list made me think and. Oh my god.

SWORD MAIDENS

More practical information: there are 14 books. Yes, I know. The first book is The Eye of the World - it's fun and probably not exceptional even though you can feel the hints of how grand and insane the greater worldbuilding will be, and some characters really shine (Nynaeve!). The second book is where it really gets original, the third book is where I went from "books I like" to "series OF ALL TIME". If you don’t like it by book 4 then give up. If you like book 4 as much as I did you will never ever want to give up.

There's also an Amazon Prime show, currently S1 has been released! I haven't watched it beyond the first ep, but plan to do it soon; it's a lot more f/f than the books and the back half had some pacing issues (partly due to COVID fucking with the production) but definitely very iddy from what I've heard, and I’m very excited to check it out in time for S2.

tldr PLEASE read wheel of time!

[rollercoasterwords]

10 books!! :•)

ty 4 the tag @otrtbs (+ @serethereal i'm just doing it on this blog) <3 here r 10 books 2 get 2 know me

1. a history of glitter and blood, by hannah moskowitz

favorite book of. all time probably. first read this when i was like 16 i think and since then i've reread it about once a year. keep waiting for it to like...hit me less hard but every time i read it i am still v much moved in the same sort of way that i was the first time!!

2. the last unicorn, by peter s. beagle

feel like this story is like. integral 2 me as a person. first encountered it in the form of the 1982 movie as a child + then discovered it was a book in high school. there are differences between the two of course but the central themes are the same + i do think the ending like. permanently altered my brain as a child such that it has shaped my worldview ever since

3. the archive of alternate endings, by lindsey drager

newest addition 2 the list!! just read this book like a month ago and it was so good that it now has a place of honor on my favorites list <3 made me full-body sob but is like. so exactly perfect for me as a book that it felt like it was written 4 me

4. animorphs, by k.a. applegate

surprisingly not a childhood series 4 me bc i watched one episode of the tv show they made in the 90s + it scared me so much that i never touched the books. however i read the entire series in college and. it is now one of my favorite works of literature ever.

5. gormenghast, by mervyn peake

this book means a lot 2 me personally bc it's like. tied 2 my dad 4 me <3 he's a big reader but our tastes only have a small overlap, so it's not super often that we'll both love the same book. but when i was in high school i was looking for something 2 read + he pulled gormenghast off his bookshelf + was like try this nobody's ever heard of it bc peake is not well-known but it's like. sprawling dark fantasy. + it ended up being one of the most beautiful + unique stories i have ever read <3

6. you too can have a body like mine, by alexandra kleeman

a favorite satire <3 love kleeman's writing style + the sort of weird suburbia-horror of this story

7. the man who laughs, by victor hugo

generally speaking i am not a big ~classics~ person however. my final year of hs this was the book i chose for my like big final english paper + it's like. the first book i really had 2 study on a deeper level + i loved all the twisting symbolism + the tragedy of it all

8. six of crows, by leigh bardugo

technically this is 2 books bc i'm thinking of the entire duology but. yeah <3 fave like. fun fantasy story 2 reread when i want a book that makes me feel like i'm watching a movie while i read it. also love love love all the characters <3

9. this is how you lose the time war, by max gladstone and amal el-mohtar

first time i read this book i felt like my brain was melting!!! so short but the exact kind of story that i love; sort of scrambled poetic writing style + weird dark fantasy + sci-fi elements

10. no future: queer theory and the death drive, by lee edelman

i actually. do not recommend this book as it is so dry + dense and an absolute slog 2 read. however it makes the list bc encountering lee edelman's writing abt reproductive futurity + the death drive was like. top 10 life-altering moments that fundamentally changed the way i think in college. so!!!

no-pressure tags: @steelycunt @dykefever @pomegranate-pill @suspendedinbush @mayescapade :•)

[christiansorrell]

RPG Read-through: Himbos of Myth & Mettle

After my recent read-through of .dungeon//remastered (originally posted to Twitter), someone there was like "I really like your old read-throughs. Have you put those somewhere else for when Twitter inevitably dies?" I hadn't! So here is a read-through I did last year about one of my favorite releases from the last few years Himbos of Myth & Mettle! - Christian

----------------------

Time to read-through one of the most fun games I've played this year: Himbos of Myth & Mettle by Maxwell Lander!

Right out of the gate, this game has such an exuberant, fun energy to it, and I like the voice throughout the writing. The concept could be done much more impersonally/traditionally, but it really wouldn't carry the same feel at all.

Straightforward d20 roll-under system with guidance to create drama and fun over everything else. I've played with the dice chain optional rule and enjoyed it! It's something I love in other games and it's fun to see its inverse here (smaller dice are better).

Interestingly, the system has a mixed success component as well - although you may not expect it with the d20 base. It takes something like your ability modifiers from a traditional game and makes that into a window of error that gets you success with a complication.

The magic system is a lot of fun here. Any himbo can use their Heart stat to attempt superhuman or supernatural things. You answer some quick questions to determine the cost and roll to see if you pull it off. There's an effect table too if things go wrong with some wild results.

The Heart system is a good encapsulation of what I enjoyed about this when I've had the chance to play it. It has this vivacious, positive, and often cartoonish energy to it where things almost always go big, in good and bad ways. It's very heartfelt (no pun intended).

Fun art (by Mary Verhoeven) and quotes throughout this book too. I wonder if these were real player characters from playtesting or maybe in-universe Legends of Himbodom?

One of the most memorable lists of player stats out there. It stresses letting players use most stats for most things. Doing something very courageous in combat? Roll Breast over Thighs. Flirting with an NPC to distract them while you pick their pocket? Roll Lips over Hands.

Death is rare, rather Himbos take Scars when they fall to 0 Heart (acting primarily as health but also "mana" to some extent). Each scar makes them more and more jaded, a bit more negative. After 4 scars, they retire - becoming a hero maybe (yes, heroes are bad here!)

There are special abilities, skills (gained from a lifepath system), and Heat (a bonus pool that reflects how sexy you are in the moment). I had a lot of fun with the special abilities in particular when I played.

D20 tables throughout help build the tone really well. It's clear what kind of characters this game is focused on after looking these over. I really like lifepath systems in games, and this one is surprisingly extensive. It's fun to roll a random character and see who comes out.

Tips section gives some guidance about trying to create a different type of story and different types of conflicts than you typically see in fantasy RPGs. I really like the take on Heroes here. It's a great twist on the genre (and is probably more accurate, honestly).

It's got two adventures in the back, including the 12th Annual Fresh Meat Games which was the adventure I got to play through at EFCon. It's a local festival and competition that the PCs join to test their mettle in front of big crowds. Lots of fun.

Nice little thing: there's a library check-out card holder on the back inside cover with little character sheets in it!

That's the game! It's a lean little book, quick to read and quicker to play. It's got a straightforward central system with fun twists and tables throughout to ramp up the drama and really the entire text just exudes a unique, over-the-top, heartfelt tone I love.

It's available digitally for $10 USD on Itch!

The hardback version is great - really nice quality, it has a ribbon and those cool sheets in the back! I'd recommend picking it up HERE.

Lastly if you'd like to hear more from me, you can do that in my monthly newsletter (includes an article, an RPG freebie, and a list of cool stuff from myself and others over the last month): https://meatcastle.substack.com

[aurorawest]

Reading update

Arthur and Teddy Are Coming Out by Ryan Love - 3/5 stars

The Fate of Stars by SD Simper - DNF at pg 32

A Gathering Storm by Joanna Chambers - 4.75/5 stars

I kept getting the Madame Leota room from Haunted Mansion stuck in my head as I was reading this (not a bad thing!). This book has a surprisingly low rating on the Storygraph, and I'm not going to torture myself by looking at the reviews, but I'm assuming it's because of the power discrepancy between Ward and Nick. Clearly it didn't bother me as I really enjoyed the book!

Dionysus in Wisconsin by EH Lupton - 4.75/5 stars

At some point I might get tired of Mid-Century Modern romances, but not this day. This book was super fun, with an interesting world and lovely characters. And a Midwest setting! I've spent a lot of time in Madison, Wisconsin, where this book is set, so I got the added bonus of knowing most of the places pretty well. There was even a shoutout to an obscure piece of Madison history, the Lost City in the Arb. I have to get the second book in the series now!boy

Boy Meets Boy by David Levithan - 3.25/5 stars

I gave this book an extra quarter of a star for being written in 2003, when it would have been genuinely pretty groundbreaking. Reading it in 2024, it's very twee and pretty cringey (the queer utopia town would have been a magical fantasy in 2003, not so much now in a lot of places). When Levithan credited Francesca Lia Block's Weetzie Bat books in the acknowledgements, I though, ah. No wonder. Hated those as a teen.

All that said, there's some genuinely lovely writing in this book, and it has its place in the queer canon.

The Greywacke by Nick Davidson - 5/5 stars

Super interesting nonfiction about the discipline of geology and how the early geologic epochs were figured out. Also gave me an idea for a historical romance about gay Victorian geologists.

Home Grown Talent by Joanna Chambers & Sally Malcolm - 5/5 stars

I think I loved this one more than the first in the series. The social media scandal was perfect, in that it was exactly as absurd as every social media scandal is, and thus hilarious, but also chilling in how even something so stupid can ruin people's lives.

The First Bright Thing by JR Dawson - DNF at pg 1

Prince of the Sorrows by Kellen Graves - DNF at pg 30

Reuben's Hot & Cold by M Arbon - 3/5 stars

Slight Foxing Around the Edges by Melissa Polk - DNF at pg 132

Restored by Joanna Chambers - 5/5 stars

Balefire by Jordan L Hawk - 4.75/5 stars

A Rulebook for Restless Rogues by Jess Everlee - 4/5 stars

The Mars House by Natasha Pulley - 5/5 stars

See my brain vomit about this book here. If you've been around here for any amount of time you know all Natasha Pulley's books make me feral. Absolutely no exception here. I cannot believe her first UK publisher dropped her over this book. Idiots! It's wonderful just like everything she's ever written.

In the Case of Heartbreak by Courtney Kaye - DNF at pg 181

The Piano Tuner by Daniel Mason - DNF at pg 21

The Charm Offensive by Alison Cochrun - 5/5 stars (reread)

Just as good as the first time I read it!

Exhalation by Ted Chiang - 4.5/5 stars

The Foxhole Court by Nora Sakavic - DNF at pg 84

Crisped + Sere by TJ Klune - 4.75/5 stars

It actually kind of makes me mad that this series isn't Klune's most famous work, because it's real good. At this point it seems kind of unlikely he's going to continue it, but man, I'd love another book.

These Silent Stars by Chani Lynn Feener - DNF at pg 68

Trailer Park Trickster by David R Slayton - 5/5 stars

See below.

Deadbeat Druid by David R Slayton - David R Slayton - 5/5 star

I LOVE this series. Love love love love. Absolute must read. If you're a fan of KD Edwards's The Tarot Sequence, this series is right up your alley. It seems like there will be more after this initial trilogy, and there's also a spinoff book coming soon which I'm super excited for. Read them!!

[specialagentartemis]

For the ask game: i mean the obvious one of course is murderbot, but hmm….This is How You Lose the Time War counts as sci fi, right?

For the Modern/Classic Sci-Fi Ask Game

If you like The Murderbot Diaries, I think you would also like The Vorkosigan Saga by Lois McMaster Bujold, starting with... well that's a complicated question but I would say starting with The Warrior's Apprentice (1986).

On the surface it's sort of hard to justify why, except that the vibes are there. The vibes are Right. Miles and Murderbot exist on the opposite ends of some character axis but I have a hard time naming what. (Other similarities: multiple Hugo Award wins, surprisingly active tumblr fandom for a book, Beta Colony.)

The Vorkosigan Saga spans more than a dozen books and mostly follows Miles Vorkosigan, disabled nobility of a feudal backwater planet that after a wormhole collapse centuries ago was only recently re-integrated into galactic society. The Warrior's Apprentice starts with teenage Miles getting rejected from military academy, so through a series of misadventures he accidentally starts a mercenary army instead. The early books are military sci-fi and interested in fast paced but thought-through space battle tactics, a lot of which are very concerned with control of jump gates between inhabited systems (the way Vorkosigan space travel works absolutely informs the way I think about Murderbot space travel), but the tactics are second to Miles and the motley collection of characters he assembles with his cleverness, charisma, impulsiveness, and ability to talk his way out of any problem by talking his way into an even bigger problem.

Also in the next book there's a scene where Miles and his cousin steal state secrets using space!Zoom.

As for This is How You Lose the Time War... honestly. This one is stumping me! That's why I've been sitting on this for so long. I'm sure there's something in the dreamy 70s sci-fi zone that I haven't read much of. (I won't actively inflict Dhalgren on you lol.) However this question is making me remember that I still really want to read Dreamsnake by Vonda N. McIntyre (1978) and The Steerswoman by Rosemary Kirstein (1989), both of which are like, feminist/queer science-fantasy of the Feminist Sci-Fi Wave that are about travel and journeys and knowledge rather than combat. I haven't, so I can't say whether they fit the rec or not exactly, but they're ones I've been looking forward to for a while and have not yet gotten around to.

[hylialeia]

I never did write and post my thoughts after I finished reading Priory of the Orange Tree but given I've been thinking about the state of the fantasy genre a lot lately - across YA, adult, and "new adult" categories - I figure now is a good time to do that.

I didn't particularly like this book.

And I find this weird to write, because unlike most books I end up disliking, Priory was consistently well written in a technical sense, had a narrative voice I generally navigate towards, and consisted of some genuinely impressive worldbuilding and well-thought-out fantasy concepts.

Yet it took me months to finish it. I even hit a point where I almost DNF'd the entire thing, I was so surprised by my lack of motivation to continue. This book hooked me, presented me with something interesting, and then... completely flat-lined.

While a lot of this could have just been media burnout on my end (you can never really account for how your own personal mood and context when you start something new), I at least know for sure that my lack of enthusiasm had nothing to do with the novel's length. In fact, one of my technical criticisms of Priory is that I think it would have benefited immensely from splitting its story into a series and extending things, fleshing out more of the characters in each of their respective settings, as well as allowing for a lot more build-up towards the climax and eventual intersection of the characters' storylines.

As it stands, those are the areas that felt the most rushed and underwhelming to me. There were several potential instances of conflict throughout the novel that the narrative brushes over or ignores in a way I found particularly disappointing. In a book that grounds itself in examining religious bias, propaganda, xenophobia, and sexism, there were surprisingly few deeper conflicts or tense moments between our main characters. This became especially apparent by the end, when widely accepted histories (and religions) are turned on their heads and most of our POV characters carry on without any sense of fallout, betrayal, or lasting hurt. Each and every character puts aside their personal biases and histories in a way that should feel admirable and satisfying, but instead felt less than believable and even... underwhelming, given the speed with which it was done and the potential (fascinating!) conflicts that those agreements squandered.

I couldn't help but feel that the characters of Priory were either half-baked or intentionally watered down for the purposes of being palatable. Tané, Niclays, and Sabran were (in my totally subjective opinion) the most interesting characters by far; it doesn't escape me that they were also the ones who did, said, and/or thought some of the more uncharitable and even downright terrible things within the novel. Tané's inferiority complex and self-sabotaging nature, Niclays's mixture of pessimism, cowardice, and bitterness, and Sabran's privilege and willful prejudice, all served to make them more fascinating to me. They gave me clear character flaws that made their respective stories more interesting, flaws that stoked my desire to see them improve (or deteriorate) on the course of their character arcs. I found myself disappointed when those arcs became rushed in the final act, those flaws never proving a sufficient obstacle to their dynamics or growth.

Ead and Loth were sadly the worst case scenario. I wanted desperately to like them, but every POV chapter they had seemed to be written by an author terrified to make them in any way unlikable, or even portray them as in the wrong. Ead ends up being completely right about everything; the falseness of Sabran's history, her religion, and her country. Her only missteps result from a lack of information, which she quickly overcomes or is the first to genuinely discover, thus erasing any feeling of culpability that otherwise may have been implied; I never feel any legitimate moments of shame, grief, horror, or regret on her part, because the author never gives her legitimate reason to feel those things. Niclays is interesting in his betrayals and moments of cowardice, and the moments where he overcomes them are all the more meaningful for having seen him falter. Ead, arguably our main protagonist, never really gets something similar. She doesn't make any mistakes, and this is the greatest disservice Shannon could do to her as a character.

I barely know what to say about Loth, mostly because he only began interesting me when he encountered Tané - a dynamic that was cut woefully short and could have been absolutely fascinating if it was deeply explored. Prior to this moment (which had to be in the last 10% of the book, if I remember correctly), Loth is "a walking camera" (quoting a friend). He has characteristics with potential; religious, loyal, and dedicated... but considering the entire basis of his faith is overturned by one of his closest friends, he has shockingly little reaction or issue with this. Due to the important of larger plot happenings, Loth has to dust himself off and just postpone his reaction to the utter disassembly of his religious background for another time - which we are then never able to see. His reactions to most everything are basic, reasonable, minimal, or even dull; he could have paralleled Sabran in his religious prejudice, even showed some effects of his society's religious fanaticism, but he never really seems to - at least, never in a way that truly feels like it's testing him. For all intents and purposes, Loth feels like a character who should be making snap judgments and loads of mistakes, but instead is relegated to keeping those thoughts to himself (even hiding them from the reader) and soldiering on.

Priory was mostly recommended to me based on the impressive scale of its worldbuilding, which was definitely a cut above the rest. I thought Shannon had a firm grasp on her setting and some legitimately excellent imagery for it. I've been made more appreciative of this by the analysis in Global Medievalism by Helen Young and Kavita Mudan Finn, which dissects how Priory (and others) takes the predominantly white interpretation of medievalism and medieval fantasy expands it in a way that's far more inclusive and also far more interesting than much of our modern day "high fantasy" media. I'm not without my criticisms, however; the worldbuilding is another area where the pacing hurts the story, as we only have one 800 page book to get to know the seemingly important settings in which these characters live. That may sound like a lot, but it's perilously little; balancing those vivid worldbuilding details with a packed plot and character arcs meant that, at any given time, one aspect was always getting the short end of the stick.

While I appreciate Shannon's attempts to write with a feminist approach to high fantasy, I think her efforts highlight an issue I have with many similar approaches. Primarily, I find it difficult for a work to address, untangle, disassemble, and analyze misogyny in a setting where they... don't really show it. We're in a state where I think many of us have become (understandably) distrustful of media claiming "realism" or "historical accuracy" to defend its portrayal of violence and various types of oppression, but lately, I've noticed the response to that gratuitousness (in the cases where these things actually are gratuitous instead of just uncomfortable-yet-intentional, that is), is to avoid these things in the narrative almost entirely. That's all well and good; you don't have to include racism, misogyny, ableism, or imperialism in your fantasy world, especially when your desire is to write an alternative escapism to these things.

But when a piece of media is striving to say something about those topics, as I assume Priory does since its driving conflict results from a history of dismissing women's bravery and sacrifice against evil and instead granting the reward of their efforts to a man, then I have to admit, I feel somewhat underwhelmed when the women in the story never face any of the trials I myself deal with in real life. Their male colleagues seem consistently respectful with rare few exceptions; women across the series are allowed to occupy roles from respected advisors to knights trained in combat. Sabran herself seems to be one of the only women deeply impacted by familiar misogynistic mindsets, as she's constantly pressured to marry a man and produce offspring for the continuation of her line. Yet even this could almost be argued to be a special case within the world, since this pressure results from the religious belief that the continuation of her line (through her, the queen, the matriarch) is keeping the main antagonist at bay. This area felt like it wanted to be a subversion to much of the gritty, "realistic" fantasy that plagues the market, but to me, it felt more like indecisiveness. Is there misogyny in this world or isn't there? Is there homophobia in this setting or not? The answer could simply be yes, no, or even somewhat, but instead it felt like a "maybe".

Overall, Priory of the Orange Tree fell flat for me, maybe because my expectations were too high, or maybe because I just wasn't in a place to really dig my teeth into it. Mostly, though, I believe it fell flat because Shannon failed in what I believe to be the most important area of focus in a work: character. I would have traded worldbuilding, plot, imagery, and much more for a cast of characters that felt more intensely raw and complex, that were more unabashedly real in their flaws even if they risked becoming unlikable. Sitting at a 5.5/10

[haztobegood]

✨ Twenty Questions for Fic Writers ✨

Thank you @reminiscingintherain for tagging me!

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

67, soon to be 68 with the Trick or Treat Fest ficlet I've written!

2. What's your total ao3 word count?

359,280

3. What fandoms do you write for?

One Direction. I've written some 1d rare pairs which adds BBC Radio 1, Music, Fashion Model, and Actor RPF to my fandoms list in ao3.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Nailed By Louis, Not Another Lonely Christmas, All That You Need, The Prince and The YouTuber, Take on Me

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Not right away but I do respond. I read them as soon as I see the email notification, but I wait to respond until I need a boost. It's so nice to reread every comment in my inbox as I respond.

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Surprisingly not the one that ends with MCD! My angstiest ending is a 500 word girl direction ficlet The Phantom Heart.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I love happy endings so it's tough to pick! I'm going to go with We're Getting Better With Time because it's about second chances, so the ending feels like a new beginning for their love.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

The closest thing I've gotten to hate was a tweet about Premier Fantasies where someone was appalled by the Harry Styles/Ted Lasso pairing. It wasn't aimed at my writing, just the choice in pairing, so I took it as a compliment that I could write something that shocked people.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do write it, but not as much as I used to. When I started writing I felt so much pressure to add smut into every fic because it gets better engagement, more hits, etc. But the more I've written, the less I care about the numbers.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I've written a couple of crossovers! Premier Fantasies is Harry Styles in the Ted Lasso universe, which was crazy just because of the pairing. I had a lot of fun writing dialogue for Ted in this one. The craziest plot-wise is Love and Other Antidotes, which is a One Direction take on Emperor's New Groove, and features Kronk, Disney style hijinks, and Harry as a little cow!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of. I think short fics and rare pairs tend to be stolen less often, so so far I've been safe.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don't allow translations, but someone did post a translation of one without asking. I have mixed feelings about translations.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have not. I feel like as a capricorn I would want to have too much control over the story for it to be a good idea.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

I read and write Larry fics the most, but I also love Niall/Greg James as a pairing and think their dynamic is so underrated.

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

My very first fic. It's a werewolf pack fic I started plotting in 2017. I didn't get very far before hitting some major plot holes that I was too inexperienced as a writer to be able to fill. I have grown so much as a writer since then that it wouldn't be the same fic with the same purpose as when I started writing it.

16. What are your writing strengths?

My biggest strength is that I write for myself. I love writing short oneshots even though long fics are get more kudos. I adore the humor of crack fics, even though angsty fics get more hits. I will tackle any new rare pair I want, even if I'm the only person that will read it.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I am a creature of habit and my habits have been disturbed. I'd worked hard to develop a habit of writing a couple of times a week, and it was going so well. But after moving and other life changes in the last year, it's been difficult to find the time or energy to write. I wish I could flip on the motivation like a switch.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

There are a couple of books I remember because of the author's use of code switching throughout the dialogue, and I think it can be really powerful for some stories. But since English is my native language, I would only use it for my own writing if it added to the story, and if had the time to properly research and get it reviewed.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

The phandom in 2016 but I didn't post it back then. One Direction was the first fandom where I shared my fic.

20. Favourite fic you've written?

I'm going to do this by category because I can't choose only one:

Larry fic: We're Getting Better With Time Girl Direction fic: Close Our Eyes (Pretend We're Miles Away) Rare Pair fic: Now All The Clouds Been Lifted Ficlet: Through the Static

~~~~~

Tagging: @allwaswell16 @hazzabeeforlou @beelou @evilovesyou @uhoh-but-yeah-alright @kingsofeverything @banaanipoika9 @justanothershadeofblue @disgruntledkittenface @zanniscaramouche