#identical program

[sacredfixation]

Loki and the Deeply Valid Fear of Being a Government-Issued Android Without Knowing It

Imagine living for over a thousand years, committing intergalactic crimes, then one random underpaid TVA clerk with a monotone voice suddenly introduces the possibility that, oh, by the way, what if you were secretly a robot this whole time? And Loki, who has always carried himself with the absolute certainty of a god, pauses. Like. “Wait. What if I am?”

He hears that question and immediately does a full mental diagnostic. Have I ever glitched? Ever felt oddly mechanical? Experienced an unusual fondness for oil? Maybe he’s too good at lying. Too good at surviving. What if that’s just the programming?

The TVA worker just moves on. He doesn’t elaborate. no reassurances. theres no safety net. Just the terrifying possibility that he might get instantly vaporized for something completely outside his control.

Id like to note, his hesitation isn’t even just some random existential crisis, it’s trauma-informed. This man already lived through the experience of waking up one day and realizing he wasn’t who he thought he was.

He grew up thinking he was a prince, a god, Odin’s rightful son, only to find out he was actually a stolen relic of war. A Jotun. A creature he’d been taught to hate.

He thought he knew himself before, and he was wrong. What if he’s wrong again? What if theres something else about himself thats been hidden? If he didn’t realize he was a Frost Giant, whats stopping him from not realizing he’s actually some highly advanced synthetic being?

It’s not just a funny existential gag, it’s a callback to one of the most devastating truths of Loki’s existence:

He has never really known who he is.

It’s the muscle memory of having his entire identity ripped out from under him. It’s the learned fear of asking, What am I, actually?

Because the last time he asked that question, the answer ruined him.

[judgmentbytheh0unds]

you. you made me out to be something special, your prized possession, your protégé, and i trusted you with the deepest parts in my mind.

you just left me like everybody else.

i’ll forever wait for you to return with my collar still intact, じま.

[starlitvases]

I'm so tired of joining syscord servers and seeing "fusion" and "integration" and "dormancy" on blacklists. Those terms are quite literally indicative of healing. It means I'm healing and I'm not as traumatized from being thoroughly abused. Why the fuck do I need to censor my healing? Why do I need to censor when GOOD things happen to me? Fuck syscord for having this notion that fusion, integration, and dormancy are bad things

[battlevann]

After playing through chapter 1 of dream bbq I've begun to think that the mannequins we see throughout the game are the mass produced bases of ENA's that either never received their ENA shell or somehow lost it, leading to them no longer recognizing their identity or purpose as an ENA, which is why they are either dead or walking aimlessly

[traumaedge]

They killed a kid and created an abomination.

[queenoffoliage]

Part 3 of Louis getting precedingly more cursed somehow, S32 E3 concept art edition

[spark-hearts2]

BAM! Take these Caine drawings I have been saving up! Close ups under cut.

@galactic-knightmare @the-spam-specialist I think all of our Caine’s would be friends :)

Text: did chatGPT write this? I’ll kill you

3 fingers? (For human Caine design)

Blanket Caine lmao

[howlsofbloodhounds]

wait, im kinda confused now, doesn't osdd also develop from a trauma in childhood? Or am i missing something??

OSDD is not just the “plural disorder.” OSDD-1, the ones with alters and systems, does form from childhood trauma. OSDD is diagnosed when someone shows signs of a dissociative disorder, but does not meet criteria for an already existing dissociative disorder.

The main dissociative disorders are Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), Dissociative Amnesia, and Derealization Depersonalization Disorder (DPDR).

If one does not meet the criteria for those but shows signs of a dissociative disorder that significantly impacts their life and functioning, they can be diagnosed with OSDD; and usually the person will be given a reason as to why they were diagnosed with it, but not something else.

There’s technically 4 “types” of OSDD, but i remember that someone will not be diagnosed with “OSDD-1” or “OSDD-2.”

I feel it also important to mention that, according to the wiki, these are not actually types; they’re just examples of presentations that can be experienced or observed in those diagnosed with OSDD. There could be more and different examples of presentations possible with OSDD.

It is just all OSDD, and a reason will be specified. Taken directly from the wiki, “An example would be specifying "OSDD (dissociative trance)".”

Someone who shows signs of a dissociative disorder but doesn’t mean criteria for the ones above, and isn’t given a reason why, can be diagnosed with Unspecified Dissociative Disorder or UDD.

These guys can also potentially have alters and systems and the like, they just aren’t diagnosed with DID or OSDD either because of a lack of meeting criteria somehow, or more likely, because there’s a lack of sufficient time. Possibly other reasons as well.

Taken from the Wiki, these are the 4 descriptions of 4 example presentations that can be present in the “catch all” diagnosis of OSDD;

“Chronic and recurrent syndromes of mixed dissociative symptoms:

The DSM states, "This category includes identity disturbance associated with less-than-marked discontinuities in sense of self and agency, or alterations of identity or episodes of possession in an individual who reports no dissociative amnesia".

The ICD-11 describes this presentation as "Partial dissociative identity disorder".

(This is the one commonly referred to as OSDD-1/OSDD1, and OSDD-1A and OSDD-1B. Systems and alters, like DID, but not DID because they fail to meet a specific criteria to be diagnosed with DID. OSDD-1A and OSDD-1B are also community terms im sure, someone will not be diagnosed with these letters or terms or numbers.)

Identity disturbance due to prolonged and intense coercive persuasion:

The DSM gives the examples of "brainwashing, thought reform, programming, indoctrination while captive, torture, long-term political imprisonment, recruitment by sects/cults or by terror organizations." People with this presentation, as a result, may experience distressing changes to and/or questioning of their identity.

(This one is commonly called OSDD-2. A very well known but fictional example of this is the Winter Soldier/Bucky Barnes from the MCU and Peeta Mellark from the Hunger Games series, although neither are officially or canonically diagnosed.)

Acute dissociative reactions to stressful events:

This category is used for acute dissociative episodes which may last anywhere from a few hours to weeks, but typically less than a month. The dissociative conditions are characterised by "constriction of consciousness", including "depersonalization; derealization; perceptual disturbances (e.g., time slowing, macropsia); micro-amnesias; transient stupor; and/or alterations in sensory-motor functioning (e.g., analgesia, paralysis)."

(OSDD-3.)

Dissociative Trance:

This category represents a dissociative trance; "an acute narrowing or complete loss of awareness of immediate surroundings that manifests as profound unresponsiveness or insensitivity to environmental stimuli." The DSM specifies that "The dissociative trance is not a normal part of a broadly accepted collective cultural or religious practice".

In the ICD-11, this condition warrants a separate diagnosis of Trance disorder.”

(OSDD-4.)

So all in all, OSDD is simply a “catch all” diagnosis. Those diagnosed with it can have prolonged, childhood trauma—and those diagnosed with the first example presentation of OSDD typically and often do—but experiencing prolonged, childhood trauma is not a requirement or required thing to be diagnosed with OSDD.

“OSDD-2” is often even something that’s diagnosed due to extensive trauma, abuse, and manipulation experienced later in life as teenagers, young adults, adults, or even elderly.

One can experience this type of abuse as a child as well of course, but it’s not childhood specific.

Those who undergo the same type of abuse and trauma that those with “OSDD-2” (aka OSDD (Identity disturbance due to prolonged and intense coercive persuasion)) do, can instead be diagnosed with DID or “OSDD-1” (aka OSDD (Chronic and recurrent syndromes of mixed dissociative symptoms)) if they’re a system (because im pretty sure someone will not be diagnosed with two dissociative disorders, even if their experiences and symptoms match up or overlap with two), and not everyone who undergoes the abuse and trauma that those with OSDD-2 do will be diagnosed with OSDD-2 or any type of dissociative disorder.

For example, not every survivor of human trafficking or other forms of organized abuse develops a dissociative disorder or is diagnosed with OSDD-2, even if they experience some dissociative symptoms (likely as coping mechanisms, as opposed to the coercive and external, induced nature of dissociation in OSDD-2) and likely have PTSD/C-PTSD symptoms. Just the same as not every cult survivor is diagnosed with OSDD-2.

[themurdersc3ne]

ART FOR OUR SYSTEM SERVER

Our mascot! His name is Scitter and he’s a C-DID system :3

JOIN HERE

[creature-wizard]

Okay so, this wonderful infographic gave me what I need to explain how it can be extremely easy to make someone think they have DID when they don't, and talk about my own experiences as someone who doesn't have DID, but has had my brain do things that could look like programmed DID to the people who were convinced that this is a real thing.

So as this infographic shows us, everybody is multifaceted. We all have different parts within our selves, so to speak. Different parts of ourselves can hold completely contrary opinions and beliefs.

So here's an example: There's a part of me that believes that there is no supernatural activity in the universe whatsoever, and that we live in a deterministic universe.

But there's another part of me that's like, "Hmm, actually, there are a few reasons to think there might be some supernatural things, and there's no strong evidence to support a deterministic universe. And besides that, determinism is kinda demoralizing, and there's the fact that people behave better when they believe in free will, so..."

There's a lot of contradictions like this in my brain. And my anxiety/depression often gives me some gnarly mood dips that often prompt my brain to prioritize its more pessimistic parts. But ultimately, I'm still experiencing these states as a single person.

For most people, these different parts are essentially integrated with each other, blending smoothly into each other so that it forms a fairly cohesive self. Most of us don't effectively become a different person when something happens to prompt us into prioritizing a different part.

But in a multiple system, these parts aren't integrated, because childhood trauma disrupted a key stage of brain development. This means that for multiple systems, each part is essentially its own entire person.

Now, here's one way somebody can be tricked or trick themself into thinking they have DID: Denial and repression.

Here's a hypothetical example: Someone grows up in a church where they're always told that the church's teachings are perfect. But they see where the church's teachings don't really prevent abuse; in fact, talking about abuse within the church is discouraged.

However, they've also been taught that eternal damnation awaits anyone who defies the church and its teachings. So they always push away the part of them that acknowledges that the church's negative aspects and force themselves to focus on whatever positives they can find.

However, this repressed part is still there, stewing under the surface, building resentment toward the church and toward its god.

Then one day something finally snaps, and this person can't hold this part of themselves back any longer. It bursts to the surface and they make a raging rant against the church and against God.

Once this person gets it all off their chest and the pressure is relieved, they find themselves absolutely horrified because what they've just said is in such drastic conflict with the part of themselves they've forced themselves to prioritize, the part that they've convinced themselves is their only set of beliefs and feelings.

This is where the SRA/RAMCOA/TBMC/ITBC/whatever they're calling it now "expert" can come in and explain that actually, they just experienced a programmed alter fronting. Then they explain how there's all of these secret Satanic cults that program people to have good Christian front alters but also program them to have other alters that hate Christianity.

Literally anything somebody might be repressing this way could be interpreted as a programmed alter. A woman who represses the part of herself that wants to explore taboo sexual desires or even just present herself as a sexual being can be convinced she has beta kitten programming, for example.

Another way people can come to wrongly believe they have DID is failing to understand that different parts in a person's can become associated with certain characters or figures, and that these parts can be "channeled."

For example, someone with abusive parents watches a TV show with a character who feels outraged over the way their parents abused them. This resonates with the part of their brain that feels outraged about the way their parents treat them, and they form an association between this character and their own feelings.

Once this happens, they can experience this character expressing opinions and stating intentions fueled by these feelings, and when their brain prioritizes this part of themself, they might find themself acting more like this character in some way. Furthermore, they might also be able to "talk" to this character and have this character respond, or feel an emotional reaction from this part of their brain.

This is something my own brain does. Sometimes when I watch media, I occasionally have a character get associated with some part of my brain, and sometimes they just seem to pop out and insert their opinions. Or I can just go "Hey character, what's your opinion?" and they throw out an opinion from that part of my brain.

This link can also be reinforced by writing fanfic about the character, because the writer is using that set of feelings to guide how they write the character.

The more somebody watches or writes the character, the more their brain implicitly understands what the character "should" do, and so it becomes easier for their subconscious to just throw stuff out. Again, I have personal experience here, and numerous writers out there can confirm that they experience characters like this. Many writers report experiencing this kind of thing so intensely that it completely throws their story off the rails - the characters effectively "take over," and the writers just have to go along with it. It's a well-known thing among fanfic writers.

Of course, you don't even have to be into fiction for your brain to associate some kind of figure with a certain part. Anyone can easily associate the general idea of a strong, powerful man with the part of themself that wants to do violence. Anyone can associate a dog with the part of themself that wants to play and frolic. Anyone can associate flowing robes and glowing auras with the part of their brain that believes in transcendent divinity. If you access these different parts of yourself and try to imagine what they would look like as a person, you will probably find your brain creating what feels like an appropriate embodiment for them. And then you can channel them, and you will experience them speaking to you or through you. And if you get into it deeply enough, you might even experience them taking over your body for a time.

Ultimately, a person can have such a character or figure take up residence in their brain with such vividity and apparent autonomy that they do in some sense function as a kind of separate entity, without DID or TBMC/ITBC being involved whatsoever. (In fact, torture would be more likely to hinder, rather than help this process.)

Dr. Alison Miller really gave the game away when she described how she has her patients communicate with their alleged alters. In a case of genuine DID, alters really aren't at a person's beck and call like this. (Edit to clarify: This isn't to say voluntary switching can't happen, or that alters can't be called forward in certain cases, but Miller was basically trying to get freshly-diagnosed people in contact with long-buried alters using a technique that was basically just channeling. A long-buried alter isn't likely to respond to this.) But this is how it works when you don't have DID and you're poking around at your own very integrated (if very repressed) parts.

[planesofdelusion]

programming things that suck:

programmed migraines

programmed seizures

programmed arousal

flood programs

spin programs

God, everything about being programmed is awful

[sysmedsaresexist]

Could you please dive into the RAMCOA controversy that's been going around? I've literally never heard someone say "RAMCOA is antisemitic" until like a week ago and now there's multiple blogs (I'm sure you can guess who at this point) who are saying this and calling RAMCOA a conspiracy theory from the satanic panic.

It's being said by the same 3 blogs that all reblog the same bad takes so I wasn't putting any stock in their word. Just the latest misinfo spreading unchecked, would appreciate your thoughts on this.

You know what, I'm not going to lie, I've been dreading getting this question.

Terrified. Harassment in this area of discussion is rampant.

We are currently debating making a post and how to approach it.

I will make our stances clear right now.

I think the conversation as it is now is full of misinformation and confusion. I think no single post can cover that amount of history and the theories and controversy.

I don't think anyone understands what they're arguing about, or the histories they're trying to bring up, and how they overlap. I think many members of the conversation lack access to resources and education that the mods of this blog DO have access to. Most of the links being thrown around lead back to the same single sources.

To shorten a very long, complex, and honestly unfinished conversation: the satanic panic and RAMCOA are two completely different entities. The satanic panic was a religious political movement of the 90s pushed by conservatives as a way to scare people back into church and scare women back into their "place" at home by attacking child care facilities. It called on a lot of tropes. And many of them were, yeah, ridiculously antisemitic. As the movement got more and more sensationalized, it began to call attention to therapists (some of them bad faith) and to RAMCOA survivors as a "Look! It's real!" kind of thing. If anything, this attention hurt far more than it helped. It painted an inaccurate and insulting picture that's still utilized to harm people today.

To be very clear: programmed DID is a well documented occurrence and it can occur in several ways.

We support survivors, no matter what they call it. We support clinicians trained in treating people who have gone through that extreme level of horrific abuse. We support people learning to separate fact from fiction, in whatever way that may apply to any given situation.

SAS supports ramcoa and oea survivors.

Here's something we suggest reading, though it's very long.

Stay safe, everyone ❤️

[starlitvases]

I really need people to understand that when I and other systems say, "I'm grateful for my system and I'm happy that I'm a system," it does not mean that we wanted to be systems.

I never wanted to go through horrific abuse to become a system. I never wanted to be programmed to be a system. I never wanted any of that. I wanted a happy and fulfilling childhood, but I didn't have that privilege. I never did.

My system is how I survived. It's how I was able to cope and actually live and breathe. I'd be dead without my system. Do I hate how we formed? Of course, I do. Do I hate my system? Not even in my dreams.

I'm allowed to be happy as a system, especially if it's what saved me. I'm allowed to be grateful that my system kept me alive and has allowed me to begin healing. I'm allowed to have happy moments. Don't misconstrue my words, and don't belittle anyone else who shares the same sentiment.

[nr1-logo-design-inspiration]

Creative A + D logo design ☆☆☆

Get your logo & branding visuals to another quality level. 💌👇

Creativelogodesigns01@gmail.com

[malignant-narc]

pov: you finally enter/get trauma therapy and in the first appointment they tell you you can control your dissociation (im part of a ramcoa/programmed system, our dissociation is HIGH and we're very proud to have made the progress we have) and that if im too dissociated from my trauma the therapy wont work and therefore its my own fault if it wont 🤡 LET ME OUTTT I JUST WANT HELP

[puffyartist]

I don't know if I'll have the time to draw the idea out as a comic anytime soon, but I have thought about how Hazel and Sky would fit into Side Order and the Parallel Canon fight