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smewduck · 2 months

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Yah, that was about night, sorry about how esoteric I decided to be, but I saw your posts about her and I just got to thinking about the... logistical problems with trying to fight a bunch of dead people, let alone the fact it's a religion.

HI. HIII. THANK YOU. I TOOK THIS AND I RAN. I warned about me spewing a really lengthy response and I did, its over 1000 words oh god.

TLDR: you have really cool points. physically (?), Night is able to stage a pretty well-functioning rebellion against StarClan because my lore allows it, and because she 1) is also dead 2) has equal experience 3) prepared for a long time while StarClan didn’t care at all, and the only reason it inevitably failed was because of Night, not because of the capability of dead cats.

Very long amount of words below cut. Read at your own risk lmao idk if it makes sense. I talked more about the second ask towards the end because i wrote a lot of the rest before I saw it.

Also spoilers - nothing major, but yeah. They’re things that I kind of treat as common/general knowledge but technically spoilers.

Fighting a 'religion':

So, to begin with, i'll completely take religion out of the equation. I deliberately set up Alpenglow lore so StarClan isn't a religious aspect of the Clans at all.

In-universe this is because when Alpine was founded, it was made out of cats who either already had established religious beliefs (gods, basically, it’s not very fleshed out because it’s not important), or weren't religious at all (for example, Night). Personally, I just don't find interest in exploring religion lmao. A lot of wc oc stories have already done it, and probably done it better than I ever could.

So, StarClan's very much an authoritative, government figure for the clans!

To discuss this further, I think I have to establish some points about StarClan lore I have for Alpenglow that is vastly different to normal warrior cats.

Silverpelt refers to the afterlife basically, and StarClan/dark forest are only one part of silverpelt, obviously. It’s only specific to the Clans, let alone all the species that aren’t even cats. Also present everywhere in the Clans’ territories is silverstone - a green coloured mineral that is believed to give the Clans a greater connection to silverpelt, and subsequently StarClan.

However, what they don’t really understand is that silverstone doesn’t connect them to StarClan, silverstone creates StarClan. I don’t have a technical way to explain how, obviously this is one of the fantasy elements of this universe, but silverpelt couldn’t exist without the presence of silverstone (and Silver, the cat with 8 eyes in the art I did earlier, is the sentient form of silverstone, they aren’t a StarClan cat).

I love the eldritch takes on StarClan, but in my story that stuff’s more rooted in silverstone. StarClan is just a bunch of normal dudes.

StarClan might have power in influence, but in terms of physical, real, tangible power they can’t do much. They have no control over silverpelt, no control even over the dark forest, and the only control they have, really, of the Clans, is through the cultivating of the Clan cat’s mindset, stuck with the perspective of the two sets of Codes that render most pretty unable to grasp StarClan having negative influences on their lives.

Shattered Loyalty, the main story in Alpenglow’s universe, details what happens when StarClan begins to lose what little power they do have. When the ‘barrier’, for lack of a better word, between StarClan and the dark forest fails, StarClan falls.

Fighting dead people, for Night, isn’t physically a problem - I’ll get onto the more symbolic and internal stuff later but for now I’m gonna talk about your original points of StarClan having more time and experience.

Fighting dead people:

So, Night's also dead when the dark forest stages its first move against StarClan.

She was the first dark forest resident ever, and didn't appreciate being dumped in cat hell/prison for an alleged crime she thinks/knows/believes - whatever - that she didn't commit (the assassination of Ravenheart, who also happens to be the first member of StarClan. Night is ancient, even if she's biologically a few years old, because dead cats don't fade in Alpenglow).

So there's no weird cross-dimensional magic wizard lore-breaking or spells (idk) required for Night to fight StarClan and win, as they're already all there in Silverpelt.

Fighting dead people part 2 electric boogaloo (experience):

In terms of experience, Night's as old as the oldest StarClan cat, as established above, so she's at the very least equal in combat and strategic experience to Ashcloud, who I would say is in charge of the cat equivalent of '''''military''''' activities in StarClan (not much, they don't have a need to fight).

I can make the argument that she has more experience, considering she was the second-highest-ranking authoritative figure in Alpine's early civil war, and the clans haven't had anything close to that extent of fighting since. Their modern training probably isn't cutting it anymore.

Like, if most of StarClan is a) made of cats who haven't ever experienced active conflict, and b) commanded by cats who think the dark forest will never be a problem, how would they really fare against a dark forest army that Night's essentially been training for war for literally over 400 years, when the barrier between them and the dark forest inevitably fails?

Spoiler™: they don't fare well.

The key is that StarClan's arrogant. They don't think the dark forest will ever be a real problem for them, so they don't prepare for it or try to prevent it. Of course Night's going to win.

Then why did rebellion fail? :[

In reference to this post, Night later 'loses everything' as Silver implies. I won't specify what that 'everything' actually is, but its not because StarClan had all the time in the world and had more experience than her. It is technically because of StarClan returning, but it's tied much closer with Rainpaw's involvement (not relevant rn) and a rooting in Night's internal struggles at this point (becoming what you hate).

which i will now expand on

StarClan's return/restoration/etc idk, would have failed against the same dark forest forces that destroyed it. But, a lot of Night's character after she destroys it (into part 3 of SL) is very much involved with the degradation of the dark forest rebellion and the visible impacts of some of her actions, which she begins to dislike.

so then, you have a character caught between what's defined her existence for a long time to the point she cant remember who she was before, and the certainty that she can’t get back to that person even though she needs to, and she needs to because becoming something equal to or worse than her enemy is an unbearable thought.

Obviously, this greatly impacts the rebellion, since she's such an influential figure in it. On top of cats leaving the rebellion since 'the job's technically done', cats are losing faith in her resolve. It's complicated, but this essentially culminates in a fall out between her and Finch.

This is then the perfect distraction for starclan to swoop in and cause her to 'lose everything', leading her to a desperate, angry response with the aid of Silver (after the scene i drew) which is beyond the point of a rebellion and is much more targeted and personal towards Ashcloud, for reasons I won’t say because spoilers.

Then enter: the destructive cycle metaphors that this whole story is built on.

StarClan ‘working so great as an enemy because fighting them is something that is only ever going to hurt you more than them' is SO TRUE AND YOU WORDED IT BEAUTIFULLY.

exactly what happens with Night. After everything, they didn't really change, while she lost a lot. But it’s one of those situations where it can’t have gone any other way. She can't get what she had back until starclan's defeated, but defeating starclan renders it impossible for her to get. Either way she loses.

Your point about StarClan being eternal and therefore the Clans being eternal also is also very true and very fun.

I might even say, in this instance, that StarClan and the Clans are eternal through silverstone, and by extension so is their destruction. Which is a very cryptic sentence that only makes full sense to me, with full grasp of context. :D

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR INDULGING ME TODAY. Sorry for word vomiting over 1200 words in a tumblr post. I doubt anyone will read this all but. I had fun.

#sl spoilers #ask #night #starclan #dark forest #silver #silverstone #yippee #i was having a lot of night thoughts when i drew night art today. glad people agree #i will post this and then hide in shame

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ninjadudettekira · 2 years

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Happy American Thanksgiving, here’s art I did. A few days ago was my birthday, got a new iPad been drawing and ended up with this.

Y'all know that post I did a few weeks ago about the Charmcaster, Darkstar, and Albedo team up? I'm writing a fic on that, it's not out yet because I'm trying to finish the damn thing before I post it so it's not stuck in editing hell like my other fic is.

Anyway at some point Sunny joins the group, and somehow I ended up with a new ship. (There isn't gonna be any Charmcaster x Michael in the fic btw.)

Full disclosure: The hands I had to trace from the reference I was using cause I couldn't get it right, and the background was from the show that I blurred and edited to make it fit the box. Maybe I’ll art dump on here or my DevaintArt (Kira-Sema) one of these days since I have drawn a lot from my phone, my sketch book, and my old iPad. I just haven’t posted any of them anywhere public cause it’s either traced from references/screenshots I used, traced of old drawings, or it just didn’t come out the way I wanted it to. (Or it’s for my Ben 10 AU that I haven’t made public and the drawings are spoilers for the story.)

Under the cut I explain some of the story I’m writing and how this ship came about from it. (If y’all want to wait till I get to posting the story ignore the ‘keep reading’ cause it spoils the story.)

Aight so by the time I get to this point in the story, Charmcaster, Michael, and Albedo are more anti-hero than full on villain. They're more friendly with the Alien Force Trio, but not going out of their way to do anything "good". (Canon still kinda happens except that Enemy of My Frenemy happens before Girl Trouble.) Michael has a better grasp with his powers and doesn’t have to feed on people to get mana, Charmcaster ended up helping with that by giving him tiny bits of her mana at a time till he turned back to normal. He still can accidentally absorb mana if he touches someone who has a lot of power so he refrains from having physical contact with Charmcaster and Gwen. (And if he does it’s for a short time or it’s channeled through someone else to channel back to the original person. Is that possible? Idk but I’m doing it lol.) Albedo is able to use mana too, but it’s weaker. (The same level as Kid Gwen’s when she was just starting out, so his mana is blue over being pink/purple. He has to rely on using spell books over being able to channel mana by itself.) He’s been trying to use mana to try and get back to being a Galvan, but he can only be a Galvan for a short period of time. Instead of Sunny being taken back to Anodyne by Verdona, Gwen makes the suggestion that they take her to Hex’s mansion and have her be with Charmcaster, Michael, and Albedo to try and get Sunny to change her attitude a bit. Michael is smitten as soon as they meet, and for actual reasons not because of her being a more powerful Anodite. In order for Michael to be able to touch Sunny without draining her, they use Albedo as a conductor since his mana is still weaker than theirs. During this time Albedo is working on refining Michael’s gloves so they can be an insulator so it limits him being able to absorb someone’s energy. At first it’s only so Michael can be able to safely have physical contact with Sunny, but after some time Albedo gets feelings for Sunny too. (She also constantly flirts with him as well.) The way I’m writing this is that Michael and Albedo are both with Sunny, but the boys aren’t together. Could that change? Dunno, but I don’t think so cause before this point in the story I already established that they, along with Charmcaster, see each other as siblings. (Which is why Michael isn’t with Charmcaster, their relationship is platonic in here.)

#ben 10 fanart #ben 10 #ben 10 albedo #albedo ben 10 #Michael morningstar #ben 10 michael morningstar #ben 10 sunny #sunny ben 10 #michael morningstar ben 10 #ben 10 uaf #ben 10 ultimate alien #Michael Morningstar x Sunny x Albedo #Why is it that every crack ship I have for this fandom is Albedo related #Anyone wanna see me art dump other stuff I've done?#Original reference: That 'this is my boyfriend and this is his boyfriend' quote/meme #my art

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eldritchazure · 2 years

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i have a surak-era oc who i’m gonna ramble about here from time to time.

he’s from t’paal because i’m Fascinated by that region for some reason. i really wish there was more info on it but alas. i’ll have to make shit up as i go. he was born in one of the enclaves but i’m thinking he was raised in a temple of akraana there.

(people don’t know what the goddess akraana presided over, only that she was the wife(?) of the war god khosarr, so i’m gonna make things up. i’m thinking she was some kind of goddess of magic, prophecy, and art because it’s convenient and also cool. also since one of the enclaves where her disciples lived is now an artists’ enclave so it works. her worshippers were kinda like a mystery cult, similar to the cult of despoina, hence why people don’t know what her deal was today. sorry for the info dump, i find this kind of thing REALLY interesting so i think about it A Lot.)

so this guy was a disciple of akraana and raised in one of her temples. the reason why he was sent there as a child was because he had these “visions” of the past and the future. the actual reason for the “visions” was that his mind was frequently temporally displaced. not permanently or constantly like spock’s was in disco, but it kind of came and went? like he’d be going about his day and then all of a sudden BAM there’s gonna be a horrible famine here At Some Point in the Near Future. or BAM someone was murdered horrifically at this spot A Very Long Time Ago. or someone was born at this spot and a lot of people were full of joy about it A Very Long Time Ago. he couldn’t tell when exactly things happened/would happen, only vague impressions. this is why he was dropped off at the temple by his parents. they didn’t know how to deal with the visions and figured the temple people might. is this logical or at all responsible parenting? definitely not. but i’m thinking the visions put great mental strain on him and by extension his parents through the familial bonds so maybe sending him to live with the people who specialized in that kind of thing would be able to take care of him better. whether or not that’s true remains to be seen.

i have no idea how the temporal displacement happened, or why it isn’t like how spock’s was. at this point it’s plot convenience. idk maybe it’s some weirdo space entity?? idk idk. anywho he mistook the weirdo space entity for akraana (or maybe it was akraana. who knows. ANYWAY.)

so yeah he gets these visions. maybe they slowly drive him a little mad? i don’t know!! i’ll figure it out, or maybe i won’t. but yeah he gets visions and then writes them down in a bunch of notebooks over his life. he doesn’t know what most modern things are so they’re written through a kind of fantastical/mythological lens. he predicts different wars with aliens but he doesn’t know they’re aliens so he calls them like, demons or spirits or whatever. even technology that could be found at that time he probably didn’t know about, because i’m imagining that the temple/area he was raised in was one of the ones that was generally against technology. so if he were to predict the radiation from the nuclear weapons being used at the time, people wouldn’t know what he meant until it was happening.

eventually the notebooks are found and now they’re in a museum somewhere displaying the history of the region. most historians dismiss his prophecies as the ramblings of a madman but those who look closely enough do admit it is somewhat eerie how they seem to mirror a lot of big historical events.

for example, a ship full of vengeful demons wearing the faces of vulcans emerging from a portal, who will consume t’khasi from the inside out.

anywho. at the moment his name is tova. this is subject to change. his story is pretty barebones at the moment and is little more than a concept that i’ve written out here in a very long winded post. i’ll probably flesh it out some more, add some much needed Drama and probably a healthy serving of Angst, as you do.

#pre-surak times #the time of surak #the timeline is a little wishy washy rn #he was alive at the same time as surak but was born before surak started his logic campaign #i’m thinking tova probably dies young. like twenties young.#either because of temporal displacement related reasons or civil war related reasons #or maybe he doesn’t!! maybe he gets old and grey #or there’s time travel shenanigans #i haven’t decided yet #anywho #sorry for the really long winded post full of me getting side tracked repeatedly #vulcan history #vulcans #star trek aos #star trek #tova

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afterartist · 3 years

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Have a headcannon dump of a LU!centaur Au that’s been cycling in my brain for a week, I’m quite possibly going to write a fic/do more art,

You’re free to leave ideas or suggestions for this Au as well

(Wild doodle to go with at the end)

•–•Au Basics:

-this is heavily based off the @linkeduniverse Au by @jojo56830

Basically it’s the same but every character (even side characters but they’re not important) are Centaurian, this is finicky and involves things like Cervitaurs, mermaids and whatnot,

This is hevily based on living conditions and most races are born with natural legs, ie; hylians are born with two hylian legs, and their secondary legs will grow in around the age of four depending on the food and lifestyle they’ve had until then, the secondary traits are usually set in by the age of six where they will no longer have their original legs.

—-

Now the headcannons (this is just the links cause idk much about the Zelda’s so I have to do more research)

—-

•–Time•

- The old man is a Stag, no I will not take criticism on this

Time started off his journey a young deer cervitaur, barely grown into his fawn limbs before coming into contact with Fi,

Deer are often seen as prey animals and weak, but we all know Time is seen as the leader for a reason,

My man got mad strong horns and has kicked, impaled and stomped on more Moblins then any sane person should, while deers are often seen as weak you would have to be blind, deaf, three years old and an idiot to think Time any less then the powerful stag that would lay his life down for his family

•–Sky•

-Loftwing… kind of a no brainer for this one

Oh yeah, our sleepy king has butt wings and you can’t stop me,

Sky was literally found in a Loftwing nest and the majority of Skyloft secretly think he’s a Hylian Centaur instead of the other way around,

Learning to fly was the literal worst, his wings took a few more years to fully develop so he got to flying later then most, the fact that his wings sit at an awkward place on the base between his hylian torso and his Skywing back doesn’t help that fact

Yes he’s still perfected the art of flying while asleep, not even other Loftwing hybrids know how he does it

•–Twilight •

-He’s… hes a Wolf… it’s… it’s twilight… literally what else would he be?

He was actually a wolf hybrid before his adventure started and is honestly not sure how it took so long for the chain to even start to theorise his connections with Wolfie,

Wind guessed they were long lost brothers,

Fun fact, Twi is allergic to fur, it took him embracingly long to realise, ‘Oh, I thought the air was just meant to hurt’

Legend likes to call him a husky and watch as Twi goes on a rant about how they are completely different, this went on for months before time brought a stop to it

•-Legend•

-Pegasus… is this because I love the Pegasus boots? You’ll never know

The only reason sky knows how to preen his wings is because legend literally sat on him one day and showed him

In the ‘Not quite horse centaurs’ club with Wild

His tail was unfortunately docked in his third adventure, Wind used his ‘ Customary Pirate Rope tying skills’ to fashion him a fake tail out of foe hair (yes it’s pink) and braided him a new tail,

Legend won’t admit but that was the day he started trusting the rest of the chain

Likes to cuff Wars over the head with his wings, he quickly found out Wars’ wings hurt a lot more to get hit by then his

•–Warriors•

-DragonDragonDRAGONDRA-

His scales are literally brighter then the chains future (admittedly not hard to be)

Learned the hard way that his claws are sharp and for completely non related reasons has a wooden backscratcher he won’t tell anyone about

Runs hotter then the others Links, thus why he always wears his scarf, Legend jokes he’s as cold blooded as his blood,

legend regrets.

Has an unhealthy obsession with shiny things, his time in the army has helped him restrain from stealing freshly polished swords and amour but four swears they had a freshly cleaned dagger right next to them and now it’s gone-

•–Four•

-Minish?? More like biggish (that was bad I’ll see myself out-)

Still Has four legs like a mouse instead of the two that minish usually have, but has the fluffiest tail in existence

Actually wasn’t sure what Minish were before meeting them so was super confused for the first few years after developing

When Wind was confused on how to use their pronouns (they/them) correctly they told him to just picture four mice in a Trenchcoat (it helped Wind a lot)

Paints their claws/nails, each foot is one of the four colours, the blue nails are for some reason always somehow chipped, Warriors ends up lending them some of his nail Polish which is sturdier

•–Hyrule•

-obsessing over the idea that Rules’ Hyrule is basically Australia so Rule is a kangaroo

Kangaroos are evil deer, Rule is the exception

Kangaroos are terrifying and could be hit by a truck and walk it off, lest to say Time had a mini breakdown after watching Hyrule get punched into a tree by a Hinox, stand up, then carry on with his life without so much as a scratch

They still suck at cooking

If you say ‘shrimp on a campfire’ he will ring your throat until you meet Nayru face to face,

‘I may not know how to cook but I know they’re called prawns.’

•–Wind•

-Salt water croc for my salty pirate

Changed from lobster because I personally hate lobsters

Has claws and knows how to use them, preferably on the back of legend’s legs but has learned hooves hurt to take to the face

Has 3rd eyelid to be able to see underwater, so he likes to sleep like that sometimes and creep out whoever is on watch

Wild has attempted to eat him at least twice, both times Twi had to stop the because Wind was also curious

Sky only has two legs? Boo loser, Wind has 4 and a big tail that could snap your spine (it took wind several years to learn how not to trip over and he still can’t walk for long periods of time)

•–Wild-

-Lynel… Time is not surprised

In the ‘Not quite horse centaurs’ club with Legend

Honestly thought he was a horse until Flora mentioned ‘no Link, horse’s don’t grow horns out of their head’

Isn’t sure if he’s a gold Lynel or just blond (they’re just blond)

Also has a hint of orange in his blue eyes, eyes that glow red on bloodmoons

Unlike their hair they actually like to style their tail a lot, went they went to Gerudo town he was taught how to braid and bun it but can’t do it on his own so let’s Wind do it when he’s bored

Has small horns that Time had to teach him how to take care of, cause who knew horns need maintenance

Literally no one knows how his glider is able to hold him up… or how he climbs literally anything with ease even with his equestrian limbs

Was also one of the first to use Four’s pronouns correctly as they themselves use all pronouns (likes he/they the most tho)

—- Quick sketch of Wild cause I love them with all my heart

Anyway, it’s just a poorly thought out Au and I’ll probably work on it more but have this info dump for a second as I try to figure out what I’m doing with my life,

If y’all have any suggestions have at it,

I just hope my ideas aren’t as jumbled as I think they are

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literaphobe · 3 years

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Not to be mean but you only reblog art that is extremely done and with a lot of attention given to it. You rarely seem to give any attention to stuff out of your circle,, so I think you aren’t really the person to make that art psa post?

ur missing the point of my post i think? okay let me break it down to you: fandom, for me at least, is about making friends. you become friends when someone reaches out and talks to you or when you reach out and talk to someone. i have NEVER restricted anyone from talking to me. my dms are always open, meaning anyone can message me. i have asks open, anon on, so anyone can share any opinion they want with me, which you are doing right now, and they can potentially ‘befriend’ me and reveal who they are later, if they so choose. obviously, i control what asks get published on my blog, but that’s besides the point

the point is—am i obligated to answer every ask i receive? no. i have over 3,600 unanswered asks right now. i cannot possibly do that without destroying the dashes of everyone that follows me. and the point of my post is that no one is obligated to reblog anything from anyone BECAUSE people experience and curate their experiences differently. promoting better reblog culture and better fandom interactions is an extremely good thing. what i was hopefully getting across is that trying to pin that responsibility on any group/individual in any community is EXTREMELY counterproductive. it will get us nowhere

as for why i ‘rarely give attention to stuff outside my circle’ it’s very simple. i have Already curated my experience. i don’t look at posts in the tags. i don’t want my day ruined. i also cannot follow people who shit talk dream or george or quackity etc. and a bunch of other creators. idk how to tell you this but dteamblr is very small compared to other sectors of mcytblr. most of my mutuals/friends are people that actively post. or at least actively posted at some point that we were able to cross paths. the people i talk to a lot/the most i either don’t know their follower count or they told me for some reason and its anywhere from 50 to like a few thousand. so what do i do w my friends? i don’t really turn on notifications, but i do for a small handful. i promise you it’s very random and has nothing to do with follow count. i also don’t check my dash a lot. so if something is getting reblogged a lot, it increases my chances of seeing it, but even then… half the times i don’t see what my mutuals have been saying. most of the posts on my blog are my own posts or whatever i dump into my queue

which is my next point. i use the ‘stuff for you’ tab on the tumblr mobile app. that’s where i get most of the posts i queue. its like half fandom stuff half random shit. ik. its a SUPER scuffed ‘for you page’ but yes. i generally trust that tab to show me cool stuff. and often times what the algorithm decides is ‘for me’ are posts that already have a bunch of notes. so that’s the stuff i end up queuing. if my queue is running low, i go on there to queue a bunch of stuff and then i go. i mainly interact w my tumblr account through my friends and my activity page (that i have filtered so i see asks n replies n reblogs) so if i rb something my friend made, it’s because they sent it to me. anyone is welcome to send anything to me! but there’s no guarantee that i’ll reblog it because ultimately this is my blog and i decide what goes on it. i could ignore a piece of art w 5k notes. i could rb something w 100 notes. i can’t prove it to you because you don’t have access to how i browse, but i assure you i don’t look at art and go ‘well this only has x number of notes… not reblogging it then!’ like my blog isn’t my job i just do random shit here. im not gonna scour my dash and the tags head to toe for content. im sure im missing out on a ton of content but i simply do not have the time. i also make my own content so… i’m just gonna do what’s fun and easy for me. this is fandom. i’m not being paid to reblog your posts. you can if you want to! do you want to support a struggling student? my ko-fi is in my bio. does that horrify you? yeah exactly. fandom is for fun so while we can and should promote a supportive culture, no one is OBLIGATED to do anything

that’s… really all there is to it. i don’t have a vendetta against anyone. i promise you, if you dm me with a conversation topic in mind, i will HAPPILY engage in it with you, especially if it is a mutual interest. and if i am your friend, there is obviously a higher chance i will reblog your posts as compared to people i don’t know! i can’t speak for other people but that’s how i work. i’m not gonna reblog every piece of art or writing i see, and i assure you it has nothing to do with how ‘good’ i think something is. or how many notes it already has. hope this helps 👍🏻

also if i can make some closing thoughts… tumblr’s follower count is hidden. unless you’re telling me you go up to every account you see and hack in to find their follow count… you don’t know how much traction someone is actually getting? like over half my followers are inactive i promise you. our community is very small. i’m not making posts that break 1k left and right either. random stuff i do ‘for notes’ is genuinely just for fun. like have fun, don’t obsess over who is reblogging what, and talk about the things you like on your own blog.

#ask

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udon-udon · 3 years

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So for the past few years I’m not really in any community or anything so I’m just really out of the loop and kinda just floating around which can feel a lil lonely cause it feels like I don’t belong anywhere or anything, and if feels really empty cause I’m not passionate about anything with people I know. I’ve made quite a bit more artists friends the past few years as well but it never went anywhere beyond that first few interactions in the group chat/I only interacted in a group chat (that are now all dead) I feel like I’m not acknowledged by other artists around me and/or I’m not good enough. I don’t draw a lot of fan art either so that plays a huge factor in getting noticed or joining a community :/ i also feel like because of this, ive been becoming/feeling more distant with existing art friends and haha seeing them become better friends with others makes me think that I’m getting abandoned :’) or this irrational fear that they hate me because of something i said or did that i didn’t know hurt them or something. I feel like I’ve also closed myself off more and more because of this, u know where you distant yourself so you don’t get hurt when they do leave thanks abandonment issues and then in the end I end up all alone, which I’ve come to brainwash myself saying “I’ll be fine alone, I’ll get used to it” but even if I do, I can’t help but feel envious when I see artists friends on Twitter tagging each other in art memes, replying to their art posts, etc etc. I get over it in the end cause I know that in the end it’s really all my fault for not trying to become close to other artists. You can argue and say “but udon, just get into a fandom then and start there” but I just can’t, It’s hard for me to get obsessed over things/get into things compared to when I was younger. Nothing strikes an interest in me anymore and even if it does, it’s not too deep or deep enough where I’d want to draw fan art (no:ze being an exception cause I’ve been really obsessed with her lately, but she’s not art/anime related). I started playing genshin but I already grew bored of it kinda after a week. I mean I’d still go on and do commissions even though I’m barely into the Liyue story line so I actually have a ton of content, but I’m simply not…. too interested. Also school needs me to worry about assignments so I gotta prioritize (which I still fail at) but god that goes to show how short my attention span is for liking things nowadays it’s kinda sad. Speaking of school, there’s just so many things to think about on top of these sadass feelings, it’s a lot. It leaves me no time to draw much lately, and I only manage to draw if I decide to prioritize art over school work, which makes me more stressed in the end cause I’ll have no time to work on them. I think I was able to distract myself from these feelings during the summer cause I kept myself preoccupied with making my VN, so I focused all my energy there cause I love making my VNs, forgetting all about my Sadness and Not Belonging-ness, but now that I’m done making it, I have more time to not be happy/not be able to do things I like. Also all this is probably my pre-period PMS talking as we all know, but I can’t deny that Ive still been feeling like this for the past few years. All I ever wanted was a close knit art friend group that I’m able to have fun with and chill with, and be acknowledged, and loved and wanted. I’ve had a few groups before, but they always end up becoming a ghost town or two of them getting into a fight and end up splitting up. Anyway, that is all I wanted to dump here to get it out. I know it’s still a problem that ultimately it’s up to me to fix for myself but idk when I’ll be able to fix it. Can’t it just miraculously happen one day pls. Notice me senpais (even on a serious post I still end up joking at the end to brush it off and not make things too depressed sounding which undoubtedly that is what I am. Which I’ve come to terms with and accepted that even though there are people out there doing a lot more worse than I am, my own depression isn’t something I should invalidate. But it’s still a work in progress. I need to start looking for a therapist highkey.

TLDR:

- udon feels like she doesn’t belong anywhere in the art community -she can’t get interested in things like fandoms anymore -shes distancing herself with her existing art friends cause she feels like they’re leaving her and basically just wants something she doesn’t have aka a tight knit artist friend group that won’t become a ghost town. -udon just wants to be noticed by other artists. -Udon can’t make long term close art friends. -Udon acknowledges her depression

#personal #I don’t think I’ve ever written this much about my feelings #I tend to keep everything bottled up #I don’t like talking about my feelings it makes me sad #thank you for listening to my Ted talk #I have other non-art related friend groups and I don’t mean to throw them to the side either cause I love them all #this post is talking about art friend groups specifically in the art community

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ggukcangetit · 4 years

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Tomorrow: Jungkook x Reader

Pairing: Jungkook x reader

Genre: Fluff. Grad student au!; grad student! jungkook; grad student! reader; grad student! bts

Word count: 4.6k

Warnings: Suggestive language, mild kissing. Not much else really.

Summary: At the beginning of your third year of your PhD program, you didn’t expect many changes. Until the new PhD cohort started classes, and Jeon Jungkook became part of your group of friends.

A/N: i just wrote this randomly with zero plot in mind. idk what this ended up becoming but read it and lemme know if you like it?

“Choi is a madwoman. I swear she makes me do so many lit reviews just to see me suffer.” Park Jimin, 2nd year PhD student, works part time at HopeWorld dance studio, and is currently regretting many of his life choices.

“I told you not to say yes to every single project that came your way.” Min Yoongi, 4th year PhD student, weekend DJ at Club Moonlight, recipient of the university’s most prestigious research grant, currently lives in a posh apartment four streets away from the main research lab.

“We’re older. Which means we have more experience. Which means we tend to be right more often.” Kim Seokjin, another 4th year PhD student, enrolled into the PhD program after realising that the completion of his MBA meant he would have to join the family business, amateur chef with professional sass, and sole reason behind Min Yoongi being able to afford living in a posh apartment four streets away from the main research lab.

“Not when you bet Tae he couldn’t finish grading Kang’s first year Intro class papers in 24 hours.” Jung Hoseok, 3rd year PhD student, simultaneously working on a second Master’s degree, also happens to run HopeWorld dance studio during his oodles of free time.

“Speaking of, weren’t you supposed to treat us if you lost the bet, Seokjin?” Kim Namjoon, 3rd year PhD student, plant dad, head of the graduate student council, and all-around overachiever.

“Tae was supposed to choose the place. Did you decide on which exorbitantly expensive restaurant Seokjin is going to take us to, Tae?” Y/L/N Y/N, 3rd year PhD student, roommates with Namjoon and Hoseok, addicted to bubble tea.

“I have a better plan. The incoming first year PhDs are supposed to have their orientation tomorrow. I think Seokjin should organise a mixer to welcome them.” Kim Taehyung, aforementioned ‘Tae’, 2nd year PhD student, works part time at the local art gallery, roommates with Park Jimin, deceptively fast at grading papers.

“I do not remember agreeing to that,” said Seokjin, with a frown, shutting his laptop with a definitive snap.

“Come on, it’s not like you can’t afford it,” Yoongi remarked, not having looked up from the large stack of papers in front of him. “If you can insist on paying 3/4ths of the ridiculously high rent of our apartment even though we could have moved into the perfectly reasonable priced place 20 minutes away from the lab, you can damn well afford to host a mixer for the incoming cohort.”

“20 minutes by car. It takes 45 minutes to walk there, Yoongi. Or do I need to remind you of the fact that only Y/N and Sooyoung own cars in our department?” scoffed Seokjin.

“Do I hear trouble in paradise? Have Yoongi and Seokjin finally had their first fight after years of marital bliss?” Lim Sooyoung, 4th year PhD student, part-time yoga instructor, full-time reluctant designated driver due to being the only other PhD student in the department with a car.

“Hilarious,” grumbled Seokjin. “That joke is about as old as the milk carton at the bottom of Namjoon’s fridge.”

“That’s still there?” asked Hoseok, scandalised. “You told me you threw that out 4 months ago!”

“It’s a limited edition Blue Bean milk carton! I couldn’t throw it out, Hobi,” replied Namjoon, sheepishly. The use of Hoseok’s nickname meant that he had run out of logical arguments against throwing out the milk carton that had been purchased three months into their first year of doctoral studies.

“Have you ever considered emptying out the contents and keeping just the carton?” you asked. This suggestion was met with the raising of an eyebrow and the throwing of an airpod by Namjoon. Unfortunately, this also meant that the airpod didn’t reach its intended target.

“Ow!” exclaimed Hoseok, rubbing the side of his face where the airpod had made contact. “This is why you’ve been through 33 pairs of airpods in the last year, Namjoon! You have dormant violent tendencies and terrible hand-eye coordination.”

“Now back to that mixer,” said Taehyung, turning towards Seokjin. “I’m thinking around 5 pm at the Underground should be good. What do you think?”

“Fine,” sighed Seokjin, reluctantly. “I’ll send a message on Slack. Who’s got the first years’ contact info?”

xxx

The next day, you found yourself struggling to find parking outside the Underground, despite it being 4.30 pm on a Tuesday. Namjoon and Hoseok were sitting at the back and discussing ways in which they could watch as many of the student films that were being shown over the weekend, while Taehyung sat shotgun and muttered to himself as he tried to destroy some kind of adversary on that godforsaken game that he always seemed to play. You whipped out your phone and started texting Sooyoung about whether she had found any parking.

SY: just parked… sending you the location… its behind the club

SY: is seokjin with you

Y/N: thanks!

Y/N: no i’ve got tae joon n hobi

SY: ok… wonder how he’s getting here… yoongi’s with me… said seokjin left a while back

Y/N: idk… sure he found something… uber or lyft or whatever… don't worry he won't ditch lol

Y/N: i found a spot damnnnnn. cya in a bit

SY: lol tae wouldn’t let him live if he ditched

SY: nice :D yoongi and i are in the purple section

The purple section was undoubtedly the best spot in the Underground, as you had discovered almost 2 years ago. Being new to the city, you had basically followed Joon and Hobi wherever they went to socialize or get food. It was around the end of your second month in the program that Seokjin planned a mid-semester gathering, refusing to eat at, in his words, “another cheap taco truck masquerading as kitschy Instagram bait”. That was your first encounter with the Underground as well as your first experience in the purple section. Simply put, it had the best sofas and chairs, an abundance of vintage arcade games, easy access to the bar and food counter, and a separate music setup. It also cost a lot more to sit at the purple section, but Seokjin had never been the type to scrimp when it came to anything. It had become a kind of tradition after that; every time someone had a birthday, Seokjin would reserve the purple section for the evening. Not having grown up surrounded by luxury and riches, it was sometimes difficult for you to understand how Seokjin never thought twice before spending money on things. Then again, you doubted you would’ve been this thoughtful even if you had this kind of money at your disposal. Seokjin might’ve been hard to read at times, but his heart was in the right place.

Speaking of, you spotted Seokjin standing next to a couple of people you didn’t recognise. Deciding that this was probably the best time to get introduced to the first years, you walked over to them with a smile.

“Just deposited Joon, Hobi, and Tae near the bar. I feel sorry for your tab today, Seokjin.”

Seokjin lifted one of his thick arched eyebrows at you and then burst into his signature windshield wiper laugh. “I’ll give them a free pass today. Afterall, it’s the beginning of a new academic year!”

“You’re planning on dumping all of Kang’s data analysis on them, aren’t you?” you asked, trying to suppress a grin.

“Ah, Y/N, you know me so well,” he grinned, his features lighting up mischievously. “By the way, here’s two thirds of the new cohort. Song Yeri and Jeon Jungkook.”

You glanced at the two unfamiliar people and smiled in greeting. Yeri was a petite girl with long black hair who quickly fell into conversation with you. Jungkook, on the other hand, gave you a soft nod and walked over to where Jimin was opening a couple of beers.

“So is Professor Kang someone we should be worried about?” asked Yeri, not giving you much time to pay much attention to Jungkook. “I wouldn’t want to be unprepared.”

Seokjin laughed at her worried tone. “Straight off the bat, huh?”

Yeri flushed slightly, tucking her hair behind her ear self-consciously. “Oh no- I mean, it just seemed like that from your conversation!”

“Don’t worry, Yeri,” you assured her. “Seokjin’s a fourth year - not much phases him. He’s doing his PhD under Kang so he has to do tons of data analysis for her projects. Which he sometimes dumps on people who have been bothering him.”

Yeri looked suitably concerned at this new piece of information. She glanced at Seokjin’s handsome profile and smiled uncertainly. You couldn’t help but giggle at her reaction. It really was difficult to get a grasp on everyone’s personalities just by their looks. Each and every guy in the department was strikingly handsome, and Sooyoung, the only other female besides you, looked like she had walked out of a fashion show. It would’ve been extremely intimidating if you hadn’t personally been a witness to how clumsy Namjoon was, how lame Seokjin’s puns were, how scared Yoongi and Hoseok were of anything remotely resembling an insect, how Tae hadn’t managed to cook a single meal without setting off the fire alarm or giving Jimin food poisoning, how Jimin often collided into objects because he was laughing too much, or how Sooyoung had gotten lost multiple times on her way to campus in spite of driving along the same road for more than 3 years. You were sure Yeri, and the other two first years, would definitely get over the initial nerves and intimidation surrounding their colleagues. In fact, if Jungkook’s animated conversation with Jimin was anything to go by, it seemed like he had gotten over that already.

“Come on, I’ll introduce you to the others.” You steered Yeri in Sooyoung and Yoongi’s direction.

xxx

“Thanksgiving next week! I cannot wait to get away from this blasted Ethics class!”

You were currently in Seokjin and Yoongi’s shared posh apartment, trying to proof-read a paper before the conference deadline. On the couch next to you sat Seokjin and Namjoon, eyes blinking rapidly in tiredness, while Jimin sat across from you, his silver hair tied into a messy ponytail.

The door to the apartment swung open at that moment as Jungkook walked in, armed with takeout from at least 4 different places.

“I come bearing sustenance,” he announced, as Jimin jumped up with surprising alacrity and rushed towards him.

“Your Busan blood runs strong, my friend,” said Jimin, appreciatively, eyeing all the different containers on the table. “I knew I could count on you.”

“That makes zero sense, Jimin,” scoffed Sooyoung. She was buried deep inside Yoongi’s favorite bean bag, having taken it over since the owner was currently not at home. “But li’l Jeon has proven to be a valuable addition to our department.”

“Ugh! Don’t call him that! Li’l Jeon sounds like something else,” you said, scrunching your nose in distaste.

“I agree,” replied Jungkook, rolling up his sleeves as he began opening the containers carefully. “But i can assure you of one thing - there is nothing li’l about this Jeon. In any sense of the word.”

“I’ve lost my appetite,” you declared, throwing a particularly soft pillow over your face.

Three months into the semester and Jungkook had become an integral part of your group of friends. It had turned out that Jungkook and Jimin knew each other very well, having gone to school together in Busan. It’s not as if you hadn’t become well acquainted with the other two first years - Yeri still consulted you whenever she needed advice on how to deal with grading or professors or classes in general; and Lauren, an international student from France, was very friendly and turned up at all the department hangouts. But Jungkook seemed like he had been part of your group forever - not someone who had met almost everyone for the first time about 3 months ago. As was customary with first year PhD students, they were required to complete a few mandatory courses before being allowed to customize their coursework around their individual research interests. So even though Jungkook had all the same classes with Yeri and Lauren, almost every moment outside of classes was spent with one of you.

“I can’t believe it’s already time for Thanksgiving,” said Jimin, popping an entire dumpling into his mouth. “-ime eeli plyz.”

“Chew your food, you barbarian,” scolded Seokjin, blowing on a particularly large piece of fried chicken before putting the entirety into his mouth. A couple of chews and a large swallow later, Seokjin was ready for a second piece.

“Speak for yourself,” remarked Sooyoung, holding onto her food protectively.

“I remember Yoongi telling us during our orientation,” Namjoon piped up, a can of beer in his hand. “‘In a PhD program, days are slow, but semesters are fast’. I thought he was high at that time, but I realise now that he’s a true genius.”

“I still don’t get why you’re such a Yoongi fanboy,” grumbled Seokjin, settling comfortably into the couch once again. “I’m just as wise, and definitely a lot funnier.”

“Don’t forget about being a drama queen,” said Sooyoung, nudging Seokjin’s knee with her toes. “You’ve got that one over Yoongi as well.”

“Four years and you're still as ungrateful,” sighed Seokjin, looking uncharacteristically cheerful at the teasing.

“At least I’m consistent,” shrugged Sooyoung. “Gimme some of your kimchi.”

“Consistency is only useful across data samples,” remarked Seokjin, picking up a small amount of kimchi with his chopsticks and feeding Sooyoung. “Not sure how desirable it is in human relationships. Life would be unbearably dull in that case.”

“They’ve been dancing around each other for as long as I’ve known them. Why can’t they just get together and stop their incessant flirting in front of the rest of us,” you muttered darkly, vigorously pouring chili oil over your ramen. You, Namjoon, and Jungkook were still getting your food from the kitchen, while Jimin had gone ahead and joined the incessantly flirting pair in the living room.

“Y/N is always so bitter about anything to do with romance,” chuckled Namjoon. “Jungkook, do you know how annoyed she was when Hobi started dating last year?”

“No, I don’t think I’ve had the pleasure of hearing that story.” Jungkook glanced at you cheekily, while popping open a can of beer.

“She didn’t speak to him for an entire week. Which was particularly inconvenient because the three of us had just started living in the same apartment, and we were all assigned to assist Choi on her year-end department survey. Poor Hobi thought he might have to find a new place to live.”

“I’m sorry? Were you the one who came back home after extended office hours to find your friend butt-naked and balls-deep inside the barista who works across the street from our lab? I couldn’t get coffee from there for a month because I couldn’t look Sujin in the eye without immediately imagining Hobi in his natural drawers.”

Jungkook, who had chosen this exact moment to take a sip of beer, spat out the amber liquid on an unsuspecting Namjoon.

“That’s what you get for deriving pleasure from other people’s misfortunes,” you remarked, smugly.

xxx

It was around 11.30 in the morning, when you heard a loud knocking on your apartment door. Classes had broken for Thanksgiving yesterday, which meant that today was your day to catch up on all the sleep you had missed over the last three months. But instead, you had been woken up much ahead of your intended 16 hours of sleep schedule.

“You look awful.”

Jungkook walked into the apartment, looking far too fresh and sprightly for your liking. He was wearing that godforsaken plaid shirt that hung loosely off his body, but would highlight his rather well-defined muscles every time he happened to move in a particular way. You absolutely hated what a tease his shirt was. Fortunately for you, he wasn’t wearing the skin tight black jeans which always looked like they were about to burst at the seams, thanks to Jungkook’s equally well-defined thighs.

“It’s not even noon. Why can’t you call before showing up? Where are your manners, Jeon?” you grumbled, checking to see if your pajamas had any glaring holes in them.

“I need help with the data analysis,” he mumbled sheepishly. “Professor Lee gave me a really tough dataset because I breezed through the first two assignments.”

“Still don’t see why you came over without any notice at this ungodly hour,” you continued, tapping your foot impatiently.

“I also got jjajangmyeon, kimbap, and bubble tea from Kimchi Palace.”

“What kind of bubble tea?” you asked, pushing yourself off the doorframe.

“Strawberry milk tea, half sugar, light ice, with extra strawberry jelly, and no boba.”

“I suppose it isn’t that early.”

A few minutes later, you were explaining principal component analysis to Jungkook, while eating jjajangmyeon and sipping bubble tea. The kimbap was put into the fridge for later, in case Namjoon or Hoseok wanted to have some when they got home at night.

Jungkook was very intelligent; he picked up new concepts quite easily and was one hundred percent committed to whatever he worked on. He also had a refreshing sense of humor, where he didn’t always crack jokes or stay in the limelight, but his occasional quips were enough to send everyone into fits of laughter. He got along extremely well with each of them. He and Taehyung often walked around the city taking obscure, artsy photographs. Seokjin had basically adopted Jungkook as a younger brother due to his video gaming abilities. Namjoon was glad to finally have someone who enjoyed going on nature hikes with him, while Hoseok had been hugely impressed at Jungkook’s dancing and promptly asked him to help out at his studio. Jimin already knew Jungkook quite well, and Yoongi was more than happy to teach someone else the intricacies of cooking different kinds of meat. Even Sooyoung, who usually remained closed off from new people, had allowed Jungkook to use her car whenever someone needed to be picked up but she was too exhausted to drive.

“I’m sorry I came by so early. I know you’ve been looking forward to catching up on sleep over the break,” he said softly, looking up from his laptop. That was the other thing that had struck you about Jungkook, he was very perceptive and sensitive to people around him. A rare quality which you appreciated far more than you let on.

“It’s fine. You saved me from having to cook lunch. That itself deserves many prizes from my end. You know how I hate cooking,” you shrugged.

“Speaking of, I’m making dinner for me and Tae tonight. Jimin’s visiting his brother, so it's just the two of us. And since I’d rather not get food poisoning, I’m putting Yoongi’s lamb chop recipe to good use,” he grinned boyishly. “You should come over if you don’t have anything else planned. It’ll save you from cooking another meal.”

“I might take you up on that offer. Let me check if either Joon or Hobi are having dinner at home, otherwise I’ll definitely be there.”

xxx

Taehyung and Jimin (and now Jungkook) lived about 10 minutes away from your place. It was a much larger apartment, so three people were more than comfortable there. Jungkook was staying there until he found another place to stay, but judging by how happy Jimin and Taehyung were with him around, he would probably end up staying with them permanently.

“I found parking at your building for the first time today,” you remarked, dropping your bag on the nearest couch.

“Half the people are visiting family over the weekend. You won’t be so lucky next time.” Taehyung walked over lazily, his thick black hair falling messily over his eyes. He was dressed in his favorite Celine t-shirt and a pair of the loosest pants you had seen till date.

“The perm’s still looking good, Tae,” you grinned at him, taking the soda from his hand.

“I’m planning on getting it done again once it wears off,” he said happily, settling into the couch. “Catch up on your sleep? Or did Gguk ruin your Thanksgiving plans as well?”

“‘As well’?” you asked, trying to suppress a grin.

“Taking advantage of the nearly empty laundry room and washing all the sheets does not count as ‘ruining’ anyone’s Thanksgiving plans!” yelled Jungkook from inside the kitchen.

“He woke me up at 7 am and stripped the sheets off my bed, emptied all our laundry bags, and locked me out of my room so that I wouldn’t dirty the bare mattress with my grubby clothes.” Taehyung’s grumbling was always extremely funny because he would end up pouting by the end of his rant and no one would take him seriously after that.

“Okay, the bread is in the oven and should be ready in about 15. Lamb chops are almost done as well. We’ll be dining in no time,” said Jungkook, flopping onto the couch beside you.

“That gives me enough time to answer the emails Choi sent me this morning. Jimin was right, she’s a madwoman. Doesn’t understand what ‘a break’ is , apparently,” sighed Taehyung, getting up and walking towards his room. “Lemme know when the food is ready.”

3 years ago, if anyone had told you that you would be more than halfway through your PhD having become close friends with seven of the most handsome guys on campus (or even in the country), you would’ve laughed at them and then silently questioned their sanity. But now, you couldn’t imagine life without them. Even Jungkook, you realised, glancing at the boy next to you. He had also become an extremely important part of your life. He didn’t say much, but his actions made things abundantly clear. He was extremely caring and thoughtful, even if he didn’t always have the right words to express himself.

“What’re you thinking?” he asked, looking at you sleepily.

“That this soda is almost lukewarm.”

“Don’t lie.”

“I’m not.”

Suddenly, you felt a rough set of fingers poking your ribcage. Slowly, but surely, you were squirming in place as you struggled to not spill your soda while Jungkook continued tickling you mercilessly.

“I know your weakness, remember?” he managed to say between giggles, his voice turning high-pitched as it usually did when he laughed too hard.

“Gguk stop! The soda! It’ll spill on the carpet!” you gasped, trying to keep your hand steady.

“Oh shit! Sorry. Yeah, Jimin would freak out if he saw a stain on this carpet.” Jungkook let you go so that you could place the soda can on the nearest table. But as soon as you had freed your hands, you jumped on him and pinned him on the couch.

“I also know your weakness, Gguk,” you grinned, deviously, before tickling him with all your might.

Needless to say, a scenario with two people in their mid-twenties behaving like 4 year olds, was bound to have certain consequences. In this case, it ended with both you and Jungkook falling off the couch, your faces mere inches away from each other.

This wasn’t the first time you had been struck by how handsome Jungkook was. In fact, you had noticed the exact number of moles on his face and neck, having stopped yourself from reaching out and touching the one under his lower lip on more than one occasion. His large doe eyes also held a certain innocence and wonder in them, even though he was an extremely bright and capable PhD student with a lot of varied knowledge bases. Not just that, his impressive physique had caught you off guard many times. Particularly because it contrasted so heavily with his boyish face.

None of that mattered at this moment, as you could feel his breath on your face. He was so close… If you reached up a little bit, you would be-

“The oven timer’s been beeping for the last 10 minutes. But you both are too busy eye-fucking each other to notice.”

Taehyung’s deep voice caused you both to spring apart from each other, mortification heating up your face and neck. Jungkook’s ears, you noticed, had turned a very beautiful shade of red as well.

Dinner wasn’t as awkward as you expected because Yoongi dropped by a few minutes after your ‘eye-fucking’ session, extremely hungry and annoyed at Seokjin - who had decided to use this night to slow cook some pork.

“Gguk, this is really good,” said Yoongi, once all of you had finished eating. “Didn’t think you’d be able to get it right on the first go! Y/N, what’d you think? You’ve been awfully quiet the whole time.”

You nodded your head in response, keenly aware of Taehyung’s intense gaze that followed your every move. “It was really good, Gguk. Thanks for a lovely meal.”

“Do you need a ride home, Yoongi?” you asked, once all the dishes had been cleared away. “I’ve got my car.”

“Life-saver. I need to pick up a tin of coffee from the convenience store. I’ll meet you at the parking lot in 10?” said Yoongi slipping on his jacket.

“Wait, I’ll go with you. I need to buy some soda,” said Taehyung, springing up suddenly. Not bothering to change out of his slippers, he rushed out after Yoongi, but not before glancing quickly between you and Jungkook and sending you a rather outrageous wink.

“That was… weird,” you remarked, relieved to see that Jungkook had missed your exchange with Taehyung. “Anyway, thanks again for a great meal. You’re a really good cook, Gguk.”

“Thanks,” he said, not really looking up from his phone. He had also been rather silent throughout the meal.

“I’m heading out then. See you later, Gguk.” You picked up your bag and proceeded to open the door.

“Y/N?”

“Yeah?” You turned around to find Jungkook standing rather close to you. You could see the mole below his lower lip quite clearly from here.

“You never told me what you were thinking about.” His voice was a lot more husky than usual, and you gulped as you realised you had no clue what to say to him.

“I-”

Before you could finish your half-formed sentence, Jungkook’s lips were on yours, kissing you slowly. After being frozen for a second or two, your hands made their way into his soft brown curls, relishing in the feeling of having him so close to you. You realised that you had been wanting to do this for a while now. Maybe even since the first day of classes, when he had offered you his cup of coffee after the machine in the department had stopped working.

“Never mind,” he said, breaking the kiss with a soft ‘chu’. “You can tell me another time. Yoongi’s probably waiting at the parking lot.”

“And Tae might come back any minute now,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said, a soft smile on his face.

“Tomorrow?” It seemed like your brain had short circuited.

“Yeah.” He dipped down and placed another chaste kiss on your mouth, before displaying his adorable bunny smile. “But even that seems too far away right now.”

You were really grateful that you managed to get both yourself and Yoongi home without crashing the car that night. Once you got home, you checked your phone and found two messages - a text from Jungkook checking if you had reached home safe, and another one from Taehyung.

T: the couch is off limits. don’t even think about it...

xxx

please do not repost anywhere. reblog if you enjoyed the story!

#jungkook #jungkook fic #taehyung #jimin #yoongi #hoseok #namjoon #seokjin #bts #bangtan #bangtan fic #c me write bangtan

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loudjune · 4 years

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oh no

another writing post

This time, with game....writing! Or something. Anyway it's 2 am and no one wants to hear blather. Not that anyone reads these!!

Okay so tonight I was thinking about my RPGs again, and how I really should focus and develop the tiny game to learn how to use rpg maker. The tiny game is a fangame. Of Repo! The Genetic Opera. Because it's 2020 and I just discovered the film. Due to tiktok of all things! (🎶Zydrate comes in a little glass vial🎶)

Anyway! I have the basic framework of the story down. I have the main character and a unique use for a familiar character type for the team. It's a short game, probably easy to complete in an hour? So I don't want to dump a lot of energy into it. I mean I want it to be good but, it's okay if it's a little unpolished. It's meant to be a labor of love, not a flex of skill, y'know? I just wanna make something 1) smol and 2) enjoyable for fellow fans and 3) SMOL. Something I can tackle! I mean, it'll have nice graphics and some unique art that fits the Repo Aesthetic, but I'm actually able to do some pixel work myself, and from there I can commission some character art and cutscene pieces. No idea of the cost, but I figure a bit here and there and just syphoning from my paycheck would do it. Of course the cutscene art will be the priciest, as it should be. Anyway! Back to writing bullshit shenanigan stuff.

I'm honestly afraid I'll royally fuck up the IP because I... Don't know that much about it! I'm hoping that because it's a smaller fandom, they'll be a little more forgiving if the idea seems out of place. Or something. Please don't be like the bronies, I will never recover from that. Inb4 brony bitching; ya fuckers ruined my fandom fuck off. Not you; the lusty fuckers who infiltrated older pony sites that was basically safe havens. Fuck you guys.

I really wish I could get in deep with my ideas but, again, lots of fear! So idk, maybe tell me that I can? Idk I don't have people to talk about this with so....here I am, vague posting bullshit on Tumblr. Which is not a safe place for me. God, I'm lonely.

#personal #writing #writers corner #gamedev #repo! the genetic opera

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svmmerdays · 4 years

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( 01 / muse 2 / cis male & he/him ) contrary to what the campers might tell you, that’s not timothee chalamet. that’s kc thain! this is their 6th year working here and they’re a counselor. they’re 23, and i just found out during ice breakers they’re a sagittarius. at first they might seem pretty oblivious, but they’re actually really creative. when they have down time, you can usually catch them getting high on the roof. try to get to know them for yourself this summer!

MEET THE MUN. i expect i’ll be able to solve a lot of my problems once my baby brain falls out & my adult brain grows in

hello all, my name is pepper and i have never been on time for anything in my life skjsdkj i feel like all my intros start that way but it’s simply a fact, i cannot tell time. that said i just got off from work so !!! this time i have a bit of an excuse. but omg Anyways, i am v excited for this rp, like i’ve already said in the gc,,, your girls never been to camp so i am LIVING FOR THIS! a bit about me ~cAmP tHEMED~ kinda, i have never actually gone camping but i really wanna go glamping one time so hit me up if you’re interested, whenever i am in the wilderness bugs like to try to fly directly into my eyes and idk why although i do have a theory i was an exterminator in a past life or something and now they’re getting their revenge for the their fallen ancestors yk?? i hate marshmallows because when i was like six some girl told me that gelatin was made of horse hooves and i believed her and i have not really eaten a marshmallow since with the exception of the one time i microwaved a smore in my microwave when i was like eight? but then again when i was really young i used to think god looked like king triton so i’m a gullible hoe y’all i’ll believe anything. but okay i think that’s enough, moving on to the man of the hour, kronk child thain!

BIO. what do people do when they’re not stoned? drug tw !

kc was an accident. and honestly, he was probably a bit too aware of that way too early. to start, when kc was conceived kc’s father was married to his mother’s best friend. and well, that’s not usually the kind of thing that you do on purpose. furthermore kc was conceived in a bounce house at his half older brother’s first birthday party. again, not the kind of thing you plan. you might ask how and why kc knows this information, and that would be the third reason why kc knows with absolute surety he was an accident. because his mother has been telling him all of this frankly intimate and scarring information with absolutely no shame pretty much from the moment kc could comprehend the words coming out of her mouth, and honestly likely before that. and well, that isn’t exactly the behavior of a woman who planned to have kids is it. at least not in kc’s mind.

frankly moira thain has been treating kc like more than a pet than a son pretty much from the moment kc can remember. she didn’t treat him badly by any means. she just wasn’t really a mom. she was a weird older friend who whined until kc made her breakfast and left for days on end to go to music festivals. she was the kind of friend who teased you ruthlessly rather than offering any good advice and embarrassed you just for fun. the kind of friend who shrugged when you asked them for help with your homework and who none of your other friends (or their parents) really liked. honestly, she was kind of a bad friend if kc was honest but he doesn’t know what else to compare her to. for a long, long time his mother, as unusual as she was, was all he had. that was until kc was about seven and he didn’t even have that anymore.

when kc was seven a lot of shit went down at once. to start, his mother nearly overdosed, and that was the big thing. it was a traumatizing experience overall as that kind of thing would be for a seven year old, but kc would like to think he handled it like a champ. called the police, made sure his mother didn’t choke on her own vomit, and all that. but CPS was called and kc was promptly shipped out to live with a father had never met, which went as well as could be expected (refer to how and when kc was conceived above). kc stayed with them for all of six months, but well, all kc really had to do was breathe to completely ruin their marriage. even if kace was a bit dull at times even he understood that. so he wasn’t surprised when 'the boys trip’ his father took him on ended up just being a complicated ruse to dump him at his grandfather’s house for as long as he could get away with. considering it was near the end of the school year, it was a while.

now at that point as you can imagine kc was pretty drained emotionally. his mother was officially in rehab. his dad didn’t want him around. his stepmother and half siblings treated him like some kind of leper. and all of this happened within less than a year. that’s a lot for anyone to take let alone a seven year old. little kc was filled to the brim with a lot of emotions he didn’t know what to do with so for the most part he had shut down. barely spoke unless spoken to. very rarely smiled or expressed any sort of emotion really. his grandfather played a big part in fixing that.

grandpa thain lived in a cottage in the forest and worked for a camp not too far from his cabin. he dealt with the upkeep of the grounds during the school year as well as some handyman duties when needed. and for the most part he dragged his grandson along with him as his ‘assistant’. which mostly meant that kc pulled out the weeds his grandfather told him to or passed him the tools he asked for. just simple things like that. but to kc’s surprise he really liked it. he also really liked living with his grandfather in the middle of nowhere and being able to hear the birds in the morning or take naps in fields.

kc’s father paid for his first summer at dagwood. his half siblings came to the camp as well, in fact they had been coming longer than kc had. however, at the end of the summer, unlike his eager half siblings, kc didn’t want to leave again. dagwood had become this safe have for him of sorts, a place where he was slowly able to heal at his own pace, and he knew the moment he went back to his father’s house he would be returning to an environment he was unwanted. his grandfather made it so he didn’t have to return at all by offering to take kc in permanently.

it took some time and a lot of legal paperwork but kc’s grandfather ended up becoming his legal guardian. his grandfather home schooled him to the best of his capability during the school year, and during the summer’s kc attended camp dagwood and helped out his grandfather in whatever way he could. he continued to do so even after he turned eighteen, even going as far as to help out in between the online art school classes that he decided to take on a whim. his grandfather regretfully had to retire from dagwood, after working every day since the camps opening day. he retired with a lot of pride and kc is really proud of him honestly, and he has every plan to take his grandfather’s place once he gets promoted from counsellor. his grandfather insists that he doesn’t need to, and that he wants kc to do whatever he wants to do but kc is too stubborn and loyal to hear any of it. he’s determined to continue the legacy his grandfather is so proud of, and stay at the place that brought him so much comfort and peace, even though honestly it’s probably not the best thing for him. it’s honestly probably time for kc to move on to bigger and better things but he hasn’t realized that yet so until then, dagwood it is.

PERSONALITY. me as a hotel receptionist: *greets guests by playing hotel california but cutting it off right before they say california*

LOYAL. listen if you’re kc’s friend he would die for you and that’s just a fact. he is honestly loyal to fault. he will screw himself over for his friends because he’s dumb. theyt won’t even ask him to do it! he’ll do it anyways! he’s a fool

STUBBORN. not in an obvious way like generally kc is very flexible, go with the flow? will generally not hold an opinion in most arguments and is pretty happy to follow rather than lead. but when it comes to things that kc is passionate about?? oof. a bulldozer couldn’t move him. he’s a pain in the ass.

OBLIVIOUS. he’s a fool. kc will be the last one to know about his own damn feelings. kc will be the last one to know about anyone else’ feelings too. it could be so obvious. SO SO DAMN OBVIOUS, and yet kc??? has no idea. he’s that scene from juno where juno’s like ‘i like you’ and michael cera’s like ‘as a friend?’ jkdsdjk

CREATIVE. the only thing kc’s good at is creating things. he can make pretty much anything if he puts his mind to it. probably makes his own clothes honestly. can mend and repair yours. just as a weird brain tbh, if you ever want a different perspective on something go to kc because he’ll say something so wild sdjkdfkj

COMPASSIONATE. a kind boy tbh. wouldn’t hurt a fly. catches spiders in his hands and takes them outside. is a vegetarian. will listen to your problems any time and at least offer help even if he has no idea what to do.

LAZY. will fall asleep standing up with his eyes open. has fallen asleep on buses and ended up in different states. is terrible when it comes to getting up in the morning. eats his breakfast half asleep every day. like he’s a hard worker when it comes down to it, but if the options are playing with the campers or taking a nap in a warm patch of sun kc knows what he’s choosing... honestly kc is good with little kids but he would vastly prefer his grandfathers job, cause his gramps just worked by himself for the most part, and working with kids is so much more exhausting rip.

HEADCANNONS. you’re in her dms im daydreaming about her on public transport we are not the same.

loves all branches of art honestly, is also a big fan of music. can play the guitar, the drums and bass, all skills he mostly picked up on his own while being home schooled by his grandfather. tends to be rather humble about it but he’s actually pretty talented. will play the acoustic guitar by the campfire, is one hundred percent that guy

when doing art activity counselling kc has the energy of that one pottery guy from tiktok always. like that’s kc straight up.

has a bunch of tattoos that are mostly doodles that he made himself, sometimes doodles his friends have made too if he likes them enough. will put pretty much anything on body and tends to think of it as his canvas. wants to be that old man covered head to toe in tats by the time he’s ninety.

has been stung by wasps on fourteen different occasions over the years. literally kc has been stung every summer since he’s come here and it’s pretty much tradition at this point. like he hates it, but if too long goes by without him being stung he starts to get paranoid.

loves to climb things like trees and buildings. chills out in the branches/on top of roofs a LOT. would be the guy to fall asleep in a hammock and get a mustache drawn on his face by the campers. honestly that has probably happened.

jewish! kc’s religion wasn’t really a big part of his life when he was living with his mother but by the time he moved in with his grandfather that changed. they go to the synagogue together and everything even if it’s a bit out of the way.

might be narcoleptic honestly. is sleeping 99% of the time. if you don’t know where kc is check his bed tbh

will never tell anyone what kc stands for honestly, he thinks it’s amusing for people to guess. will answer to any version of k____ c____ you call him though. also accepts kace which is just a nickname for a pair of initials but skjsdm still he will answer to it

a hard worker even if he doesn’t look it. weirdly functional while working high? kc is one of those people who you never know is high cause he just acts as he normally does for the most part.

that said he is the most focused and like alert when drawing or painting or doing anything with his hands. takes his art incredibly seriously. has probably drawn up a mural for the camp, and literally stayed up three days and three nights to do it. very talented but doesn’t really think he’s talented enough to do anything with it? could get into art school if he tried, but he’s too loyal to ever leave his grandfather or the camp behind to do it.

very good at wood working surprisingly. this boy will make you a sexy ass chair. honestly kc is one of the those frustrating people who like you show him how to do something creative one time and he’s got it, his brain has tapped into it, he remembers. but don’t worry, give him one math problem and he completely shuts down sdkjsdjk

hates wearing shoes. will take his shoes off the moment he has the opportunity. straight up leaves his shoes places and then’ll be like ??? fuck where did i put those ???

can cook surprisingly well. makes bomb weed brownies but like just in general kace makes good food. always forgets to grocery shop until his fridge is empty though

dresses like a hippie. his general aesthetic makes it look like he was in nineties movie. wears wire rimmed glasses because they were his grandfather’s and he’s too broke to buy new frames. most hipsters see him and are like !!! cause they think he’s one of them but kc knows nothing about movies or coffee or like... anything but art really so they’re pretty quickly disappointed.

used to have hella long hair when he was younger, like he was usually picked on for looking kind of girly because of it. didn’t really care that much, or at least convinced himself he didn’t really care that much eventually. was glad when he got home schooled though cause at least then he didn’t have to deal with that anymore,

has a scar through his eyebrow from when he fell out of a tree his first summer.

has several ear piercings.

i forgot to mention, kc’s mother used to be a drug dealer before her overdose but he doesn’t really know what she does now. he doesn’t talk to her very often but he talks to his dad even less. whenever his mom contacts him it’s cause she’s gotten out of rehab and needs money. kc will usually give it to her because he’s soft.

WANTED CONNECTIONS. it takes me 3-7 business days to process my feelings

i am so tired so we’re doing this in a blob but i would love LOVE some exes from summers past, some ex flings, his first bf/gf, idk his first kiss would also be cool, someone who hates him like maybe an enemy or an old rival of some sort? an old stupid rivalry from when they were campers that they still can’t let go of now? just sayin. uh, an fwb or ewb situation maybe, another childhood friend would be cute, an opposites attract situation like i would love for kc to have a dynamic with someone who really has their shit together yk like completely different from his sleepy ass, a smoking buddy maybe! a family friend! godsibling! first love! someone who kc accidentally set on fire with a flaming marshmallow when they were thirteen! anything and everything please and thank you.

#dagwoodintro #this... took so long rip #and yet i want another muse #icb dkjdkj #this is also a mess but w/e

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anansislibrary · 5 years

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All of my thoughts on RWBY: taken from one of my videos here

If you haven’t watched RWBY yet... I honestly don’t know what to tell you. The show is genuinely one of my favorite anime of all time. It’s got an amazing cast of interesting characters, great writing, an amazing world to get immersed in. Every character you meet sticks with you, many of the fights are fast paced and memorable, and being a lore buff like me pays off in this world.

But RWBY isn’t... perfect, and having finished the newest season and rewatched the show from the beginning... I have some issues.

Don’t get me wrong, the new season had some excellent parts. The fight between Blake and Adam was literally perfect, and side note, idk why fans are saying Adam got nerfed for this fight or made weaker, when some of his only notable feats happen during this fight. The man lands hits like mortal kombat combos.

Anyway, I don’t want to just crap on the show so before I go into what I didn’t like, I’ll get into what I did. But before then, I’ll have to give you a brief rundown of the show. But before THEN I gotta give my obligatory plug

So make sure you like and subscribe if you enjoy this video and want to see more like it, and consider donating to my Ko-fi if you’re able to to help support my channel and help me make better content.

Without further ado

Here’s RWBY

Quick basic spoiler full rundown of the show.

Rwby takes place in a world callled remnant, with a shattered moon. Why is the moon shattered you ask? Satan threw a temper tantrum

Anyway

There’s monsters

Schools for people to fight monsters

Except no Because the main character’s school gets blown up by this BITCH NAMED CINDER, SCREW YOU CINDER.

Prompting Ruby and her Gucci gang to go on an adventure.

Got it? Good.

So here’s everything I love about the series.

I really like the character designs. Every single character has an excellent design and I could really do a video on how character design helps develop character and tell a story just using this show. Every person in the show has an interesting and cool design that helps you to remember and understand them.

An easy example is Weiss. She dresses like an actual princess, her color scheme and weapons are all very elegant looking and it hints at her high class status without even having to spell it out for you.

Plus I love how characters names are based off of fairy tales or mythology. For example, Sun, Sage, and the ironically named Neptune. The motif of fairy tales is fun too, for example Ruby being Little Red Riding hood, Ozpin and Glenda Goodwich being wizard of oz references, ironwood being the tin man and Leo being the lion, Qrow and scarecrows and all of that. Weiss and Winter both have names very directly based on snow.

Every name in this show was very clearly thought out, and even abilities too.

Sun can make clones of himself just like in the myth, Blake has issues with running from her problems, so she can make clones, yang has anger issues and can go super saiyan, almost everyone’s power has something to do with their personality.

Salem is such a fun villain. I wish she could do more because she’s really sinister and scary. She’s such a fun villain to watch but she doesn’t do shit.

I also love the fight scenes, I love how bombastic and fast paced they are, and it’s really cool how every character has their own unique style of movement and fighting that vary between them. The fights in this show are quick and stick in your mind, and there’s an emphasis put often on how much a character can move in a short amount of time.

Cinder as much as I hate her is also a great villain, and that’s why I hate her.

Roman Torchwick is also a GREAT villain and The way he dies is satisfying as hell, and seeing Neo again made me scream.

The worldbuilding is my favorite aspect of the show. Now I’m weird and I like info dumps and that’s why I enjoy those World Of Remnant videos that expand on the worldbuilding so as not to bog down story with info dumps. The world is really fun to learn about, how humanity has evolved in terms of technology is fun to speculate on, for example since Grimm attacks are common and destructive, towns outside of major cities are less technologically advance because they often don’t have time to explore that and have to move from town to town quickly in an emergency.

The Grimm are excellent monsters with varying abilities that make them scary. I love the Apathy from the most recent season, and how it doesn’t just attack you like a Beowulf, Ursa, or Nevermore, but it drains away your will to fight back at all.

This show also has my favorite trope of all time MIXED TIMELINES

YOU GOT TRADITIONAL CHINESE CLOTHING AND DRESS AND ASIAN ARCHITECTURE ON TOP OF CELL PHONES TOWERS AND ALL OF THAT

this trope is so fun because it really makes a world feel unique.

The world of Naruto has all kinds of modern stuff, but until Boruto it was mixed with older tech and tradition, really selling how this is not our world.

Another thing I love: every weapon is a gun. That is SO fun.

Now as good as the show is, it does have problems. That’s inevitable though, all shows, movies, and books have problems, nothing is perfect.

Except Avatar. Avatar is flawless.

Me pointing out the issues I have with this show is by no means to say it’s bad, just to point them out.

I truly do have love for this series and I still cry about Phyrra and her death.

I love you baby.

But that being said, pointing out the issues a show has can be important for both understanding the pitfalls to avoid in our own writing, and helping creators fix issues later on.

A lot of hard work goes into making this show and I would just be an asshole if I did nothing but shit on the show.

No matter how many issues it has, I can tell the people making it love what they’re doing, and that always shines through a series no matter how many issues it has, just like a show or movie can do everything conventionally right and still be a soulless shit show.

Looking at you call of duty black ops 3.

So here’s the issues

Fight scenes

I love the fight scenes. I’ve said that, they really can be so fun to view and I find myself coming back to them a lot.

But I have issues.

Lemme just say first that I don’t like complaining against animation. Animators go through enough crap already and it feels mean to criticize them at times, but this needs to be said.

One, I hate how people throw punches in this show.

They swing so wide it’s annoying.

Okay listen. If you swing at someone with a punch this wide, and they know how to fight, it will not land. They will block or dodge. I know this because as my subscribers know, I am a martial artist. I know jujitsu and boxing, and I took taeqwondo.

This is a bad punch.

My theory is that they do it to emphasize the impact of a bit, but that’s not necessary. There are other ways to do that.

You could say “they’re animators they don’t know how fighting works.”

But Naruto exists and those animators get martial arts stuff down PAT.

Hell, avatar the last airbender depends on its animators being able to animate fights with consistent accuracy, and those characters use styles most people have never heard of like Baguazhang.

And I know this doesn’t seem like a big deal, but it is. It’s hard to really get behind fight scenes at times when the characters can’t throw a simple punch right.

And again it’s not like it’s impossible for animation to animate a fight.

There’s a scene during a fight in Naruto where Obito Uchiha kicks Kakashi, and Kakashi uses his foot to redirect the kick and pull obito off balance.

This is a real move, that people do, and it’s done accurately, but RWBY seems to struggle with accuracy in their fights. Which is fine when a character’s weapon looks like this, but not in hand to hand.

This issue comes up in sword fights too. The way Weiss fights annoys me because her sword is a rapier, and the most important characteristic of a rapier is that often times they don’t have blades, they have points, and when they do have blades, they aren’t meant for slashing. Rapiers were made to exploit the gaps in someone’s armor by stabbing them, and thus it is a thrusting sword, not a slashing one. A sword like a Katana or Khopesh would be good for slashing. Roman gladius can kind of do both, but not as good as either one.

The point is that if they’re gonna give Wiess a rapier, they need to stop animating her slashing with it. Especially when her rapier doesn’t appear to have a sharp edge.

My next complaint is wasted characters.

It’s very frustrating when RWBY takes times to show us a character, but then never uses them.

I didn’t even know sun had a full team sometimes because you never see them.

And furthermore it’s annoying when a fight scene will just stop so that a character can do a cool thing.

Oh no this robot is so hard to beat, how will we beat this dangerous and powerful robot

Oh wait, this character can solo it because the plot needs to pause so she can be cool then promptly never be seen again.

It is so frustrating and it makes it hard to actually know when a character is in danger.

It takes 20 hits to kill a Grimm in one scene, then like two in another.

And the reason for that is because the plot is being pushed aside for the sake of spectacle.

A character’s abilities will be made inconsistent for a chance to make them seem cool.

Like this scene where Tyrion is fighting qrow, he uses his tail to block bullets.

But why?

He has his Aura up, the bullets wouldn’t hurt him anyway! Then when he gets shot later after he looses his aura his tail comes off.

If he was fast enough to use his tail to block bullets he wasn’t even paying attention to, why can’t he do it now!

There is no internal consistency.

Like why are Grimm so strong if they don’t have auras? That’s not explained because they Grimm rarely serve the plot, they spectacle. Adam putting 20 kombo hits into yang to beat her makes sense. He has to wear down her aura to actually hurt her.

But 20 hits to kill a grim that then gets solo’d by a character later on?

No.

Then there’s hazel.

He annoys me.

His villainous motivation is that his sister joined a school for trained soldiers, then died because it was dangerous and now he hates Ozpin.

Dude what?

Like I get why he’s mad, but she knew the risk and someone had to sign off on her getting in for her to be able to go to beacon at all. A child can’t just register for a school especially one where it’s a known risk you could die.

Also another thing I hate is how characters will overreact to stuff in annoying ways.

This is mostly in the most recent season.

Spoiler alert here

But everyone finds out the history of Ozpin and Salem’s relationship from Djinn

And then they just all hate and distrust Ozpin.

Here’s my reaction to finding out about ozpins relationship

It’s just... not that big a deal.

Okay so he was pipping the villain at one point

Nigga so was dumbldore!

It’s just annoying how Ozpin didn’t really do anything but he still was treated like he was just a bad person when he wasn’t.

That whole plot point feels empty, and I found myself more annoyed with the characters for being mad at him and wasting time, than mad at Ozpin for wanting to get laid.

My next complaint on this nitpick fest is

Shit what was I gonna say again?

Oh yea, that annoying ass military lady and her whole reason for not letting the heroes into atlas.

That was so annoying and pointless. She really had no reason not to let them through, and her getting into a giant mecha to fight them pulled me so far away from the story because it was just too ridiculous.

The mecha is for fighting Kaiju grim but it’s taken down by like five kids and their drunk grandpa.

Which like... fine but I hate it.

I hate that whole sequence.

It didn’t have to happen like that, it was another fight purely for spectacle.

It made me mad.

Plus I really really hate mecha anime and mecha fights in general.

God I hate them.

I skipped almost every mecha fight in Voltron because I hate them.

Look the point is that rwby is definitely a good show and I love almost every part of it, but these issues really pull me away from the story at times and you can really sense how much of the story is less about progression and more about increasing drama like the Ozpin thing, or looking cool.

Please watch rwby it really is worth your time, just be aware of the issues it has.

#rwby #ruby rose #yang xiao long #rwby season 7 #rwby spoilers

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bendthekneejon · 5 years

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About ‘Estranged’

Yes. I deleted the first and only chapter of the fic. My apologies to the ones who read it and wanted it to go on. I’m really sorry. Here are the reasons why, for the ones who are interested: I’ve been writing it as an escape from all the negativity in the Jonerys fandom. The last thing I thought was that I was gonna receive that amount of negativity in the comments. Call me weak, call me a quitter, whatever you want, but I’m not in the right state of mind to endure so much criticism. I know the following chapters would’ve proven wrong many of these readers, but I don’t have the time/energy to keep on receiving these messages until they’re up.

That being said, I’m just gonna share some interpretations of the first chapter that baffled me. I’m restating their replies here (even though this has all been clarified in the fic itself, I’m taking the time to write this jic anyone wants further explanations).

Some comments said…

-That I lowkey ship Dany and Daario. NO. Lmao the two times Daario has made an appearance in my fics, it’s been as an antagonist. I only ship Dany and Jon with each other.

-That I “tricked” you into reading a Dany/Daario fic without tagging said ship. Omg. I’m not gonna tag a ship where the relationship is abusive and I’m literally showing NO love between them. Dany is escaping this relationship and Daario is a repulsive man. It’s not fair to the people in the Dany/Daario tag. If it was a Jon/Dany abusive relationship with ZERO love scenes between them while Jon has a love story with Sansa, I’m sure many Jonerys shippers would complain if it were tagged as Jon/Dany.

-Dany didn’t DUMP Jon for money (she didn’t dump him at all). Actually, she was the one who convinced him to change his major from engineering to gastronomy, someone who cares only abt money wouldn't have done so. Dany took the opportunity for a scholarship in the south, planning to go back to Jon after a year, but then she started working there as a painter. Jon got a great job in the North as a sous chef--if Dany cared about money as some say, she would've gone back to his arms as soon as he had gotten that job. My point is: if Dany went back to Jon, she would've had to live without following her passion (painting); if Jon went to Dany, he would also have to abandon his passion (northern seafood). So it was inevitable, it was an act of love to let the other go so that they could pursue their passion. This was never about money. Idk if you've read my other fics but I'm quite vocal about prioritizing your passion over the income it can give you. That was basically the point of To Be Alone With You. This is about what you feel is your point in life. For some it's the arts—gastronomy, oil painting—and having the opportunity to make a living from the arts is an amazing chance that you cannot reject if it's your thing.

-Dany DIDN’T go to Daario for money and sex. He had been nice at the start, she had found similarities between them, and she felt so lonely and devastated about not being able to have Jon back that she went for it. She needed company. She was already making money in KL, it wasn’t about the money.

This fic was a whole lot of fun but also a huge challenge for me. I spent so much time doing research about oil painting, cooking seafood, about how chefs fucking BUY FISH at the goddamn TERMINAL and all these things the characters do some of you to bash it? I’m writing this fic for myself. The fact that I share it on AO3 is a plus for someone else to enjoy it if they want to.

I’ve always actively sought for constructive criticism on my other fics to improve as a writer, but I don’t know why some people think that if they don’t like something personally, it’s fine to bash it. This, like many of my other stories, could be sitting on my computer files and never seeing the light. It takes up a shit load of courage for me to post every fic, a heart attack every time I hit the “Post” button. I think those who aren’t writers can never understand this anxiety. Yes, I value (constructive) criticism, but more than anything, I value respect. I’ve never disrespected you. If you don’t like this fic, you can close it.

I made my mind and, at least for now, I’m better off without this fic than with it. The point was to show two relationships: an abusive one and a healthy one and contrast them. The point was to show when there was love in a relationship and when there was only attachment, unhealthy attachment. The abuse that would be shown here was going to be subtle, not aggressive and purely ‘evil’ because many abusers aren’t completely ‘black’ in real life, they have their good and bad moments which make the abused think they just have some “bad days”.

Look, To Be Alone With You had a practically immaculate comment section, no negativity in it. It’s a fic about love—romantic love, self-love, fraternal love, etc.—and it’s focused on healthy relationships. Estranged was going to be a contrast of both healthy and unhealthy to prove a point of how a healthy relationship should be and why it’s important to flee when you’re trapped in an abusive relationship. And for fuck’s sake, I was clear in the notes about Jon not being Dany’s “savior” here, that she wasn’t a “damsel in distress” waiting for her male savior. Both Jon and Dany had their own problems and were gonna help each other out with their love and care for one another because they knew each other like the back of their hands. But yeah, I guess some people are too quick to judge and thought otherwise.

Not to sound arrogant but To Be Alone With You was quite popular, I sort of made a name (or a pen name, lol) for myself with that fic, and I was happy to know that I was recognized as someone who “knew about love”, “explored love realistically” and all these nice things some lovely people have told me. I’d rather keep my reputation of someone who spreads the message about healthy relationships, about loving people around you and loving life, than risking this “reputation” with a fic that people are too quick to judge. I’d rather be thought of as the writer of TBAWY, not as the writer of Estranged (even though both were going to have the SAME message in the end, but fuck it).

Sorry to the ones who actually enjoyed chapter 1. And a special hug to my darling @mytargaryenchildren who’s there for me unconditionally (and i’m here for you unconditionally too) and to @hoffyphoenix for being so kind and supportive.

If I gather more strength, I’ll post the fic once GOT is over and people in this fandom chill out a little bit (assuming GOT will end well lmao). But that’s a big if.

#fan fiction #I'm really sorry to the ones who wanted to keep on reading it #it was a terrible mistake to post it in this time of the GOT season #i'm just impatient and as soon as i'm done with something i want to post it

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indigoumbrella · 5 years

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So I’m having a lot of doubts and second thoughts about taking this new job, which I will rant about under the cut.

So I kind of had a panic attack today about this new job and just finally broke down. I’ve been reluctant to take this job from the start because I know I’m going to be miserable about it. I’ve been trying to look on the bright side. Which is all the money I’ll be making. But the thought of leaving the library just completely breaks my heart. Especially since I’m leaving it for a place that doesn’t give a single fuck about me or my child.

And today my son started his after-school program that he does every year and they asked me if I’d be willing to teach monthly art classes. This is a GREAT opportunity for me. Something I love doing and have done before. But if I take this job, I won’t be able to do that. I also won’t be able to take art classes at the college like I’ve been wanting to. I also won’t be able to take the mandatory divorce classes once I get that stuff underway. Because the strict schedule just won’t allow it.

And this job is just making me feel so uneasy. I know I need to make changes in my life, but I can’t shake the feeling that this is the wrong choice. I got an email from them this morning about the rules I’ll need to follow.

And it’s basically like, you need to have 100% attendance for at least the first six months or we can fire you. Under no circumstances can you accept personal phone calls. Under no circumstances are you allowed to have personal items on you, including cellphones. Surprise, outside of your normal schedule, you’ll have mandatory overtime whenever we damn well feel like forcing it on you.

I also just have no job security whatsoever. It’s very easy to get fired and part of me is worried I’ll be fired before my benefits can even kick in. The library won’t fire me unless I really really royally fuck up.

And idk, just all these things combined, I had this horrible flashback to when my son got hurt at school and had to go to the hospital. And I just imagined them trying to get ahold of me if this happened again. How long would it take for me to find out he got hurt? How long would it take for me to get out of there and go to him? Would I lose my job for choosing to leave in the middle of a shift? And the mandatory overtime thing? I’m already struggling to a way to get him from school on days I’m working. What’s going to happen if they throw overtime on me unexpectedly like my old job did? I don’t have that luxury.

And then I remembered when he got sick at school last year while I was working at the library. I got to him in less than 10 minutes. He was able to call me directly at the front desk. I told my boss he was sick and they didn’t even wait for an explanation or excuse. They just let me go to my boy and take care of him and let me make up the hours later. They were more concerned about him than who was going to pick up the slack. And they love him. I regularly bring him to work with me and they all love him.

And last week when I was sick? I texted my boss to tell him I couldn’t make it in and I was sorry and he said, “Don’t worry about work. Just focus on getting better.” They never asked me to make up any hours. They just let me take the time I needed to get better. That’s the kind of company I want to work for.

And really my only problem right now is that I just don’t have enough money for food. I make enough to cover my bills. Just not enough for both. I do have other options. I still have Doordash, even though I don’t want to do it in the winter. I still have plans to get my art going. And now I have people wanting me to teach classes outside of my job at the library. And yeah it’s only once a month. But it’s still something. Something that makes me happy. A way for me to bond with my son. A way for me to do what I love and potentially move myself into something more permanent.

I just don’t want to do this. I don’t want to say goodbye and leave this job for a place that treats me like a number and has such a high turnover rate that even managers only last a year or two. I need the money, yes. But have I really exhausted every option or was this just the easy way out?

I don’t know. I talked to my boss about it earlier and I dumped a lot of personal stuff on her (which I feel really bad about) but she was super understanding and said that they’ll let me stay if that’s what I want to do. And that she also has a lot of connections and is more than willing to help me find a second job that fits me better if I’m willing to accept it. She said she’d give me until Monday to make up my mind.

So that’s where I’m at right now. Technically I already put in my 2 weeks and accepted the other job. But nothing is set in stone yet. I just don’t know what to do. I need to do what’s best for my son, bottom line. Is staying at the library selfish? Or should I just suck it up and go to work at this awful place and miss out on time with my kid just so I can have more money?

I still need to make changes in my life, but those changes are already in progress. At the end of the day, I just need to make enough money to buy food. And once those changes start to manifest, I’ll have that. And once I have that security again, I can start focusing on other ways to make money. I have people helping me with branding and my art and publishing and all that. Will those get me lots of money? Absolutely not. But I’m not trying to get rich here. I just want to survive.

So now I’m stuck at a crossroads. My heart is telling me to stick with the library and push for those changes, deal with the fact that I’ll never have a lot of money, but I’ll have enough. But logically? I can go to work at this awful company where they can toss me aside at a moment’s notice, but in the meantime, they’ll pay me buttloads of money to be abused all day (gotta love call center work).

#*aggravated noises*

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pennyfynotes · 6 years

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8.2.18 // 4:30pm // school subjects and AP exams oh my

so i recently (ok not so recently i’m sorry super busy rn) got an ask from an anon about subject specific tips and ap exams. this is the masterpost i told you to look out for ;). there are no ap exams in college, but some of the stuff is still applicable. i did my best to be as comprehensive as possible and dump everything in one place. hope this is helpful! xoxo, m ps. guess where the actual tips are? if you said “under the cut” then you’re right bc i’m predicable af

tips by subject:

languages (i took spanish): 1. flashcards are your friend. i don’t care if they’re digital (would recommend quizlet or studyblue) or paper, but they help immensely with either vocab or things like remembering literature.

2. charts are also your friend. conjugations giving you a hard time? write out a chart of the different tenses and the conjugations for each subject. put down some of the irregulars too.

3. acronyms/pnemonics are also also your friend. a lot of these already exist, you just have to go find them. i’m pretty sure i still remember what “wedding” stands for for the spanish subjunctive.

4. it’s ok to start over. it’s easy to start a sentence based on what you’d say in english. you’re doing fine until *bam* you hit that word/phrase you really need but you have no clue how to say it. whether it’s an oral or written exam, take a few seconds to think about it and, if you can’t figure it out, just back track. restart the sentence and rework it. better to do that than to lose all your time thinking of one word you may or may not know.

5. skirt around things. if you can’t remember how to say fridge but you really need to say it for something, just say “machine that keeps food cold” or something. it might sound silly, but it gets the point across and removes the road block.

6. make a list. no, not a to do list. if there’s phrases you find yourself reaching for all the time, but you can never remember, make a list of them and their translations. it might be because its a phrase/part of a sentence structure you use a lot in your native language or whatever. make that list and drill just those few phrases into your head. it’s helpful

english/language arts: 1. proofread. i guarantee you’ll find a mistake, a sentence that makes no sense, or one that just sounds cringy. thank me later.

2. have a damn thesis. its ok if you just need to write and spit words/ideas out for a while to figure it out. but figure it out.

3. conclusion ~= introduction. for those of you who didn’t get the tilde, it means not. yes, they both tie your points to your thesis but they are not to same. do not just reword the same information in the conclusion. push your ideas just a little further. i usually like the push them a little bit outside the realm of what i talked about in my paper. for example, if i focused on the first 5 chapters of the book in the rest of my paper, i’ll expand the ideas to the rest of the book. or if i’m talking about female characters and focus on just one or two, i’ll use the conclusion to potentially connect it to another.

4. have favorites. pick a few fav transitions, sentence structures, and fancy vocab words. basically build a toolbox. this way you won’t have to think as hard when you want to “spice up” your work.

5. summaries only go so far. once you get to higher level english classes, there will be a lot of analysis of specific imagery, or wording, or dialogue. reading cliff notes is only going to give you the plot and none of this. if you don’t have time to read and you’ve been assigned a pretty standard english novel/play/whatever, take the time to look up some famous quotes or symbols. they’ll probably come up in discussion and this will help you look less unprepared.

6. have on question/comment ready. if your teacher/prof is into discussions and grades on participation, it’s handy to write down one (or a few) things. it’s easy to forget what you were going to say while you follow the discussion and it sucks to get docked points for not saying anything. even if it’s just a thoughtful question, jot it down.

history: 1. lol prob my weakest subject, just go see the apush (ap us history) section bc i don’t have much more for you than that.

science: 1. back to basics. i say it all the time, i’ll say it again. really understand basic concepts. they will come back. i’m serious.

2. pattern recognition. science problems are often times about recognizing patterns. once you identify the type of problem it is, even if you’ve never seen the exact one/something similar before, solving it becomes way easier.

3. make a recipe book. tied to the last one, but once you recognize a type of problem, you need steps to solve it. go through any practice problems you’re given to determine all the “types” of problems. once you’ve categorized them, make yourself a step-by-step guide on how to solve.

4. flashcards. you’ll have to know polyatomic ions or random biology facts. see languages tip #1 for more.

5. note your errors in lab. if you do something wrong, don’t just try to brush it under the table and forget about it. not that it’s a big deal, because its not, so don’t freak out. they’re just great opportunities to note sources of error. i mean obviously dont write in your lab report that you weren’t paying attention and mixed the wrong chemicals, but something like “we may not have waited sufficient time for the product to dry” can explain why you got 800% yield.

6. have a toolkit. kinda like a recipe book, but just a collection of straight facts that come up often. knowing common molecular weights and chemical properties (is ammonia acidic or basic?) will make things go faster. like i said earlier, polyatomic ions are also great.

7. brush up on some simple arithmetic. similar to the tool kit, this will just make things go faster. being able to quickly add things and calculate easy percentages (ex: 30%) will make things like hw and exams go faster. i’m of the opinion it’s always good to know how to add, subtract, multiply, and divide w/o a calculator (on paper, not all in your head)

bonus: math #5 and #7

math: 1. see science #1

2. see science #2

3. see science #3

4. see science #4. see a pattern here? you might wonder why you need to flashcard math, but it’s good for learning equations or the names of certain techniques. if the prof asks you to solve something using X technique and you don’t know what that is, that’s gonna pose a problem. also good for the unit circle (don’t get me started)

5. figure out your speed. this is applicable to most everything, but i find it most relevant for math. is it better for you to speed through the whole exam and then do it all again/check it over 2x? or for you to take it slow so you know you got everything right the first time? personally i use the first approach, but i’m a fast taker and prefer to have time to process between repeating problems instead of staring at it forever once and never looking again.

6. science #7. a lot of teachers will expect you to be able to do this.

7. go over the material a couple times. also applicable to everything. i find it’s easier to remember things when i know that concepts are connected. you might have learned X 3 weeks before Y, but if you go back over, you might realize they’re closely related. this will help you if you’re not sure on a test because you can reason through things using the connections you’ve drawn

tips by ap course (obv look at the subject above bc i will be giving *really specific stuff* here that i’ve gathered from experience. they’re also ordered by when i took them, sorry it’s not super logical but i didn’t want to forget one)

general ap course/exam tips: 1. practice exams. you need to be familiar with what will/will not show up. you don’t always need to simulate and real testing situation, but i’d recommend doing at least 1-2 that way. also *know how many questions they’re are you so can pace yourself!!!!*

2. college board is pretty good about giving topic breakdowns. use those. go through and figure out what topics you’re solid on and which need more work. the above tip is to help decipher what the topics actually mean bc it can be confusing.

3. give the free response a quick flip through. do the ones you’re confident on first.

4. make sure you know the policies/what you can bring. don’t want to forget something. also once our test administrator tried to stop us 10 minutes early, but we were on top of our shit and all gave her a death glare bc we knew when we were supposed to finish.

ap chemistry: 1. polyatomic ions and molecular weights. know them

2. chapter/section reviews (in addition to class notes) and how-to guides. my teacher made us make them and let’s just say your girl did *really* well (and i’m damn proud of that one)

3. do a quick skim of the free response. applicable to most exams but, the year i took it, they’d just remade and re-curved the exam and put *way* too many free response. like no one finished them. if that’s still the case, make sure you do the one’s you’re confident on. also, i did not get to like 3 questions and still got a 5. they may have fixed this idk. (sorry this is redundant but i wanted to give this ap chem exam specific info)

ap environmental science: 1. there is a lot of damn information here. i would use chapter outlines and pick out key terms, policies, and events etc. treat this like a history class.

2. for the exam, use common sense. most of the time, the most environmentally friendly answer is the right one. if you just have a general gist of the course and its topics, but don’t know a lot of details, go with your intuition and you should be fine. i didn’t have a lot of time to study for this one and this method worked for me.

ap calc bc: 1. memorize standard derivatives. power rule, sin and cos, chain rule. that’s important.

2. similarly, memorize standard integrals.

3. don’t forget +c for indefinite integrals. just don’t.

4. similarly, if it’s definite, don’t forget to evaluate at the end! super easy thing to do, but also super easy way to lose points if you forget.

5. if the integral looks complicated, that probably means there’s a “trick” involved. u substitution, integration by parts, trig substitution. something like that.

6. memorize some standard series’, operations, and types (arithmetic, geometric etc)

7. if you’re looking at a word problem, understand what is dependent on your variable and what isn’t (in other words, what’s a constant). for example, if it says the water flows into the barrel at 50 mL/s and flows out at 1/5 times the volume, that translate to F = 50 - (1/5)V. don’t make things more complicated by trying to write everything in terms of V (in this example). also, your equation might just be a constant term or just a variable term doesn’t have to be both.

8. know what your derivative is with respect to/what it really means. aka if your problem is talking about flow and volume, how are they related to each other? flow is the change in volume *with respect to time*. so if i differentiate volume with respect to time, i get flow. if i integrate flow with respect to time, i get volume. this also helps you make sense of word problems.

*disclaimer*: it is been 5 years since i took this class and i have taken quite a few math classes after. i apologize if i introduce anything that is a little irrelevant.

ap spanish language: 1. flashcard. like seriously. there’s gonna be vocab involved.

2. understand what’s asked. for the persuasive email. *be persuasive*

3. toolkit. i mentioned this before but this was probably the most useful for this class. our teacher gave us a bunch of fancier words to use instead of causar (to cause) because that was a word we’d need a lot. the one that still sticks with me 4 years later is fomentar. have a few alternatives for these kinds of super common words, a good greeting and closing for your email, and a set of good transitions. *make sure you know how to use them properly*

4. write stuff down during listening. you can either answer questions during the first listen, then take notes the second to catch stuff you missed or vice versa.

5. it’s ok to backtrack in the speaking. don’t let yourself get stuck and just not say anything. it’ll freak you out for the rest of the exam and will rob you from showing off what you know. also take notes of things you want to mention based off cultural knowledge of the situation related to the dialogue.

6. don’t zone out. with everything going on and all the stress, it’s easy to zone out (esp during the conversation). don’t do it or you’ll have a hard time responding and freak yourself out (again)

7. don’t lose your place in the convo! they give you a sheet that shows you how many times the other “person” will talk. i lost track and said goodbye one segment early. it was bad ok. all these conversation tips are from personal experience.

ap statistics: 1. know the different kinds of tests inside and out. know the differences and the conditions. if you’ve got that, you’re like 75% the way there.

2. be familiar with sample vs population. it’s a bit confusing, but take the time to understand.

3. ok sorry i really don’t remember anything else. this exam really isn’t that difficult (in my opinion), you’ll be ok.

ap physics c: 1. free body diagrams. understand how to draw them *and draw them*. they will carry you through mechanics. draw gravitational force, normal if there’s a surface, and then any other given forces.

2. basic equations. you get an equation sheet, but knowing the equations means you know the concepts and the relations between them. big ones are f=ma and the equations relating position (x), velocity (v), and acceleration (a). also friction f=uN.

3. *normal isn’t always the opposite direction of gravity!!!!* gravity is straight down. normal is perpendicular to the surface.

4. vector components. please don’t just add vectors. break them down into components and then add or you are so fucked.

5. get familiar with triangles. this will help with the whole component thing.

6. kirchoffs rules are so helpful. know them.

7. understand the relations between voltage/potential and current in terms of the properties of circuit elements. that means the equations for resistors, capacitors, and inductors.

8. know how to add in parallel and series. it’s important. also! if the circuit is drawn “weird” a good way to know series vs parallel is that parallel elements share two nodes and that series circuits only share 1.

9. sorry i kinda blocked out E+M bc i didn’t know what i was doing (or so i thought). i still got a 4 tho so that curve is generous.

ap us history: 1. chapter outlines. pretty self explanatory.

2. make a timeline. put important events, sentiments, policies, and presidents. if you can associate these things together into time periods it will be easier. most of the time, any one question (esp long response or whatever they’re called) will only focus on 1 time period.

3. sentiments are important. if you know nothing else, know these bc they will help guide you through questions by reasoning even if you know nothing else.

4. gilder lehrman (or similar us history summaries). these are tailor specifically to apush bc they are organized by period (i think that’s what they were called?). i actually fell asleep listening to these bc i didn’t have time to study. they were mildly helpful, but every little bit helps right?

ap psychology: 1. chapter outlines/flashcards. this course is based heavily on key terms and less so on larger concepts.

2. ok sorry i took this online i remember literally nothing except how annoying my teacher was and that the exam was easy. if you know terminology i think you should do fine.

ap biology: 1. there is a lot. go through all the topics and make sure you’re solid. start with the big picture, then think about narrowing down.

2. know how charts work. things like pedigrees, punnet squares, and evolution trees (that’s def not the right term). some of the exam will just be interpretation of this.

3. i am so sorry i remember nothing else.

ap spanish literature: 1. flashcards. title, author, time period, short summary, key elements (a line, character, symbol). this is *so helpful*

2. think about the works in relation to each other. you might be asked to compare them. even if they ask you to compare something on the reading list with something new, you’ll be familiar with the points you might talk about.

3. know the lit terms. more flashcards. associate them with a particular work if you can/need to.

4. don’t freak on the listening. a lot of the recordings are old and shitty quality. take a deep breath and try your best. know that the rest of the test takers (excepting maybe natives) are experiencing the same thing.

5. use that tool box. see general spanish and ap spanish lang.

this is so freaking long and i think the moral of the story is that i blocked out my senior year ap exams. i hope this was helpful and, if you have more questions, or want more stuff like this, let me know!

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ohcxssidy · 5 years

Text

HI babies i’m kristin and i’m so excited to be BACK bc i love veritas w my whole entire heart and?????? wow. i’m sick and got sent home early from work because of it so i’m a tired binch but i’m here and ready 2 party. i meant to have an insta graphic and playlist done but,,,,,, yikes. so maybe i’ll post those later. if you’d like to plot (or keep with the old plots we had for old members) give this a LIKE or give me a message on here or discord!!!!

stats page // connections page // pinterest board

the basics!

full name: cassidy turner skeleton: the influencer age: 21 major: musical theatre clubs: theatre, campus media (photographer), campus radio job: waitress at giovanni’s

the rest

tw: mentions of death, depression, alcohol

sO cassidy is the oldest of five kiddos. she’s got a twin brother that she’s older than by ten minutes, a half brother (13), and two half sisters (15 and 11)

cass and her twin brother were born in ashmont, ct to rebecca turner and an unknown man (to the twins anyway). their mom always claims it was a fling. he was a musician, and he had left before she found out she was pregnant.

so here you have a 20 year old suddenly now raising twins on her own. she actually did pretty well for the most part and raised her kids to be gr8

cassidy doesn’t ever TRY to be bitter abt it but sometimes it just,,,, happens??? and she hates herself for it bc he didn’t know but how do u leave a pregnant lady on her own idk

when the twins were four, their mom met a man and eventually married him!! they had three kids over the next few years, which now upped the kiddo count to 5 and they were one big happy family!!!

tbh cass saw him as her father, since he was around from when she was really young, and he was a big part of her life growing up

around this time she met daisey and the two became fast friends!! they spent basically every day together throughout their childhood (more on that later)

but THEN, tragedy struck (bc why would i let my muses be happy who do u think i am)

when cassidy was 15, her step father unexpectedly passed away, and the family was left without any direction. they didn’t have a lot of money to begin with, but now one income to feed six people was not an easy task.

with the combination of grieving, money stress, and probably fear, her mother fell into a deep depression, finding a coping mechanism through booze. she lost her job along the way, and slowly the money that was left was fading fast.

cass and her twin brother basically took that as a sign that they needed to take responsibility to keep their family alive, so they immediately took up any jobs they could find, just to keep money coming in.

most of their paychecks went into a bank account that would help the kids get by, since their mother didn’t do much of anything to help anymore.

this situation really tore up cassidy’s relationship with her mom, and most of what she feels is resentment and anger towards her mother, even though her brother doesn’t have that same opinion.

around this same time, her friendship with daisey started to fall apart, quicker than she would have imagined. it was a natural drift, coming apart due to daisey’s increasing popularity and cassidy’s lackthereof. nothing was malicious, which made it even tougher. she still misses that friendship sometimes, despite what others say about the girl.

throughout high school, cassidy worked her hardest to get high grades, because she knew that without a scholarship she wouldn’t be able to afford college otherwise.

she hardly got anything below an A, was involved in everything club that she could, and graduated as the salutatorian. she worked hard enough to receive enough scholarship money to cover most of her cost in school.

she’s currently in her final year as a musical theatre major!!!! she’s a nerd abt it too don’t open up a conversation about theatre unless u wanna lose a few hours

(here’s where i start pulling things directly from my app so they’re getting longer)

cassidy has been involved in so many creative arts let me tell u. she discovered her first love in theatre at seven years old, which was soon followed by singing and dance lessons within the year. throughout the next decade, her love for the performing and the visual arts only grew over time, and some new passions were also discovered.

she also found that she had a talent in photography and writing when she was in high school after a friend convinced her to sign up for the yearbook. what started as just a way to gain another credit and add to her college applications turned into a passion that she would continuously want to pursue. it wouldn’t be her career, but she’d always find a way to keep doing it.

because of these passions, it was no surprise that cassidy would take to social media as another creative outlet. what started out as just posting videos from theatre performances on youtube began to grow into something more, and before she knew it, she was a recognizable name on the platform. she hadn’t planned on becoming an internet personality, but now that she has, she wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.

cassidy has been actively posting videos on youtube for about three years now (essentially since starting college), and her channel currently has about 120 thousand subscribers. her channel mainly focuses on theatre related content, vlogs, advice, and a handful of videos related to bullet journaling and challenges.

a lil hc- cass’ channel is basically a mix of katherine steele and jenna marbles

she also has a pretty strong following on instagram, so she’s all abt aesthetics and making her page always look neat and pretty

cassidy can be described as a walking advice column disguised as a mom friend. she is incredibly warm and welcoming, (which can even be seen in the clothes she chooses to wear), and she always has a kind word or smile to give anyone that crosses her path on a day to day basis.

she has been known in the past to strike up a conversation with a stranger, just because she liked their shirt, or they share the same coffee order. if someone comes up to her on the street needing advice, she’ll give it to them in a heartbeat, even it’s a simple “dump him”. she’d probably give you the shirt off her back if you asked her nicely (pls ask nicely)

she doesn’t like to make a habit of sharing some of the deep dark past things that were mentioned earlier, mainly because of how many of her classmates come from money. because of this, she’s never truly felt like she fit in amongst the wealthy community that attends and surrounds the university. she’s always trying to fit in with her peers, but nothing ever seems to be enough.

ever since the news of daisey’s disappearance, cassidy has truly been at a loss for words, or even thoughts. for almost fifteen years of her life, there had hardly been a day where cassidy wouldn’t see daisey’s face, even in passing between classes after their friendship ended. since then, she still looks for her as she walks around campus, as if the whole thing was a dream, and daisey rutherford is still around and running st. etienne university.

okAY now its time for some lil fun facts and hcs!!

stans john mulaney don’t @ me

cries all the time bc a bitch is fuLL of emotions lskfjsldk. soft commercial? tears. she’s happy? crying. she saw a dog on the street?? grab the tissues. she’s a mess

her style varies but she always keeps a jacket or sweatshirt in her bag bc she’s cold a lot but also comfort™

started working in campus radio her freshman year just to try it out but now she rlly loves it!!!!!

has been in a ton of shows throughout her childhood. if you feel like looking at a mild shitpost i made for her, check out cassidy’s theatre resume (which is normal until the bottom)

honestly? just wants to give everyone hugs

this is so long im tired the end

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