#idk where it even CAME FROM it just kinda hit me like a truck and now my brain is just nothing but pac. girl HELP

[arieava]

I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT DUE IN AN HOUR THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO DECIDE TO GET OBSESSED WITH A NEW CHARACTER

[soapyghost]

Strangers

A/N - oh look at that Soapy is back. Maybe. Kinda. This fic came to me while listening to Strangers by Kenya Grace so I would recommend listening to that while you read this maybe idk. This took way to long and idk if I am proud of it

W/C- 2.3K

WARNINGS- !MW3 SPOILERS! Smut, language, fingering, orgasm(s), p i v, unprotected sex, pet names, orgasm denial, slight bondage, lil knife play if you squint, meany mean mean bad Price, literally no aftercare. H E A V Y A N G S T

"Need to see you, luv'"

You stared blankly at the text message notification, frozen solid. It had been 3 months since you last had contact with Captain John Price. You swore to yourself that last last time truly was the last time, yet here you were standing outside your apartment door waiting for his black pickup truck to come rumbling down the road and pick you up.

"Stupid" you muttered to yourself, shivering against the October chill. You knew how this would end, exactly as it always does with your heart broken and your throat sore. Soon enough you could hear the low rumble of Johns truck on the quiet street and as much as you hated it, your heart began to flutter. Maybe this time would be different, you lied to yourself. Maybe this time he'll stay.

As you finally see his headlights your heart jumps into your throat, you know this is a bad idea and your whole body is tingling to run back into your apartment and delete his number from your phone. But you know you could never do that. You were too intertwined with him to ever truly let go, and he knew it.

The car slowed to a stop in front of you, you saw John reach over and pop the door open for you. Reaching out you take the handle of the door and let out a breath you didn't realize you were holding and hop up into the truck. "John," you sigh, "we can't keep doing this. I can't keep doing this. You-" he cut you off with his lips smashing into yours. The kiss was smothering, full of want and need. Whatever speech you had in your head immediately went out the window with his lips on yours.

He was the first to pull back from the kiss which made you whine in want and the miss of the heat of his lips. You flutter your eyes open to see Price's face in the dim light of his truck and you could see his eyes were red. "Soaps dead." he whispered. Soap, his Sargent. The weight hit you like a ton of bricks, you had seen soap a handful of times when you would "coincidentally" be at the same bar as 141. He was a funny guy even if his mohawk was a bit childish you liked him.

"Oh John I'm so sorry" you choked out, holding back tears. Seeing John Price reduced to tears had some affect on you. He simply nodded and gestured for you to put on your seat belt before putting the car in drive and pulling away from your apartment complex.

You drove in silence for what seemed like hours, but it wasn't uncomfortable. You knew once you arrived at your "spot" he would pull you into the back of the car and explain everything. It's how it was with John when he came back from deployments. He needed someone to vent to emotionally and physically and as much as you hated that that's all you would ever be you couldn't deny him.

The truck clamored up the hill to the overlook of the city. It didn't matter how many times he took you here, every time it took your breath away. The way the city seemed so small and insignificant. He put the car in park and sat there for a moment, quiet before whispering, "he was the best of us."

Immediately you unbuckled yourself and moved to the backseat where you grabbed onto John and pulled him back with you. You pulled him on top of you and held him there. You played with his hair and let him just talk. To get everything out, how they were chasing some big bad guy named Makarov around Europe. How they finally tracked him down to some train station and were sent to stop him for good.

The name was vaguely familiar, and it finally hit you. This Makarov was the very same one that John and his team had put away in some dank prison nearly 4 years earlier. You kept yourself quiet while he kept rambling. Letting out every emotion he had held in for the past week since Soap's death. You knew he needed it.

It felt like an hour had passed before Price fell quiet. "I'm so sorry John" you whispered, placing a kiss on the top of his head. Finally he turned his face up to yours and looked you in the eyes. They looked tired, more so than usual. The piercing blue eyes that normally were so sharp and clear seemed clouded with exhaustion and sorrow.

"It's not your fault, luv" he replied, seeming to snap to his senses slightly before he leaned in and kissed you. It was a deep hungry kiss that took your breath away, near suffocating. As he pulls away for a breath you take your opportunity and bite his bottom lip eliciting a low growl from him. You slowly open your eyes to look down at him, just they way you knew drove him insane. You know John didn't text you for a vent session in the back of his truck.

He quickly maneuvered himself out of your lap and up to trap you in between the seat and the door. Heat began to pool in your belly at the sudden change in position. John's eyes were back to the sharp blue that you remember and they looked ravenous. He quickly smashed back into your lips and slithered his hand up your shirt to palm your breast causing you to let out a breathy moan.

"Missed this" he mumbled, moving his hand from under your shirt to below your waist. Dipping down to your panties and groaning at how wet you were already for him. Admittedly it had been quiet some time since someone had fucked you as good as Captain John Price. To be honest with yourself, you don't truly think anyone ever has or ever will. "Already so wet for me?" he purrs into your ear. "'s'all for you John" you whine back, already squirming from him.

You hear John chuckle as he nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck and begins kissing while removing his hand from your pants, causing you to let you a sad whimper. "Gotta' get these off luv'" he tuts, and removes your leggings in one swift movement. He finally returns to your panties and when he feels them again it causes him to stop what he's doing.

"For me?" he smirks, looking down at your red and black lace panties. "Only the best for you John," you whisper, before shifting and taking off your shirt to reveal a matching bra. You swear you see Johns' eyes roll back in his head as he lets out a groan. When he looks back down at you, you see a wicked grin. He moves to his pocket and with one swift movement, flicks out his switchblade and cuts between your breasts. Just as quickly he moves down to slice your panties as well. "JOHN" you shout, "THOSE WERE BRAND NEW!"

Before you have a chance to move him off you to morn the loss of what was a stupidly expensive mistake John shoves your chest back down flush with the seat and moves himself lower placing his mouth over one of your nipples. The other hand paws at your other breast and they move in tandem, the bra completely forgotten. You whine, eyes screwed shut.

"Hush now luvy'" Price soothes, slowly kissing down from your breasts to your waist and soon to your pussy, glistening in the moonlight. John devours you, licking your already throbbing clit before moving down to set a furious pace. Eating you out like it truly was his last meal on Earth. You slide down one hand to tangle in Johns' hair and steady yourself.

John knows your body like his own, and knows just how to please you. Soon your quiet hiccupping moans turned into loud cries of pleasure. And just as you began to feel the wire in your belly ready to snap, ready to push over the edge into pure bliss he stops, causing you to nearly cry out in frustration. First the bra and now this?

You look down at him, tears pricking your eyes and you open your mouth to scream at him, he moves faster and kisses you. Forcing his tongue into your mouth so that you could taste yourself on him. He moves one hand down and slides one finger into you, causing you to gasp into the kiss. He pumps slowly, knowing how close you were to your first orgasm.

After a few lazy pumps he sticks a second finger in, causing you to arch your back up off the backseat, already covered in a thin layer of sweat. John moves back in to kiss you, as he starts to move his fingers faster. Soon you're nothing more than a babbling mess, tears full streaming now down your face. "Please john pleasepleaseplease" you cry.

"Awh Princess, you can take a bit more" he chides, before pulling his fingers out entirely, your body already missing the fullness of him. He sticks his fingers into your open mouth "Suck", he commands. And you do, you close your lips around his fingers and lick all of you off of them. He moans, slowly sliding his fingers out of your mouth and reaching for his belt.

He removes it and reaches out for your hands. He grabs them and ties them tightly in front of you. He flicks his eyes up to your face, and you give him a slight nod showing him that you were fine. He moves back to his pants and unzips them and pushes them down just enough to free his cock. It springs up, nearly hitting his abdomen, the tip red and leaky.

He guides himself to your entrance, sliding himself back and forth your slit, gathering up all of your wetness on to his shaft. He leans back down to kiss you, rough and needy, as he guides himself slowly into you. You moan in unison at the feeling. Your walls pulsing around him, like they were made for him. He begins to rut into you, slowly at first giving you time to adjust to his size.

Your hands fly to his front, nails clawing for something to keep you here, in this car, with John. He grunts at the feeling of your nails digging into his chest, and picks up his pace. Moving at a punishing speed, he finally moves his hand back down to your clit.

"Say please Princess," he grunts between thrusts. The words fall from your lips, "pleasepleasepelase ohmygod John pleasepleaseplease". You swear you can hear him chuckle as he finally begins to draw circles on your clit. Panting and chanting his name you finally are allowed to cum, your walls pulsing around his thick cock. You hear him grunt, as he thrusts two, three more times before spilling himself into you. His cum painting your walls.

You both shit there for a moment, coming down from your highs. He moves first, sliding out of you and removing the belt from around your wrists and tossing it to the floor. You scramble to get your shirt and pants back on as he opens the back door and moves around to the drivers side in complete silence.

You climb over the front console and into the passenger seat, waiting for him to start the car. He turns the key and the engine sputters to life. You wait in silence for the deadly silent car ride home you know you're about to endure. But he doesn't move the car. He clears his throat until you look at him and simply gestures to the seatbelt you aren't wearing.

It was always like this, he would text you, you would show up, you'd get fucked better than ever, he would drive you back home in silence, and you'd go back to being strangers. It hurt every time. You hoped it would be different and tried to ask him about the others. "How is the rest of the squad taking it?" you whisper, looking over at him. His eyes never waivered from the road.

As you finally roll up back to the parking lot of your apartment, the weight of everything finally hits you. "I really am sorry about Soap, John" you whisper, looking over at him before grabbing your now torn bra and panties. John simply nodes at you, and flicks the lock on the door. You hop out and close the door behind you. The second you do, the truck is in drive and John Price is gone.

You spend just a few seconds blinking away tears as you watch him leave, before turning back and heading into your suite. You toss the ruined bra and panties into the garbage and head to the bathroom to clean yourself up. After you finish in the shower you head back to your room and see that you have a missed notification.

It was a CashApp notification, "Sorry -$200" from none other than Captain John Price himself. You scoffed, after everything this was how he "thanked you"? You immediately tried to send the money back but found that you were blocked. You rolled your eyes and dialed in Johns number, only to be met with his voicemail.

You flicked open your messaging app and shot him a message "I don't need your money", before throwing your phone and rolling into bed and promptly passing out. When you awoke the next morning, your fumbled around your room to find your phone and see what John had sent back. You click your screen and see no new messages, which puzzles you. He always texts back.

You unlock your phone only to be met with a bright red notification in your messages of

"Not Delivered!"

[goodenoughformeee]

A story for an aroace person aka me part 1 ( this is all rough draft kinda story) :p

you know as there is a lack of aroace characters/representation in many shows/ stories/mangas/manhwas/ etc.

So, my brain is like "if there is no representation, just make it yourself" XD

{ story summary: two best friends died and got reincarnated into the original mc and original villainess in an otome game }

So since I don't know how to start this story imma just wing it and see how it goes lol

Keep in mind I might change some of the plot in the future. Keep in mind this will be just a rough draft kinda story, I'm saying that cuz idk how to actually star the story TT

Our story starts with two best friends of whom I've yet to name so therefore will be known as A and B untill they get their reincarnated names :p

So the two best friends, around the age of 20 are returning home to their shared apartment from a bar.

As ti why they were at the bar?(Idk how a bar works, never been to one I think so bare with me here TT )It was because B broke up with her boyfriend ( this can change) so in order to cheer up B, A took her to the bar to drink her problems away. So the two friends chatted and drank and drank until around 1 pm when they both decided to go home.

So B is full on drunk and A being the one to support her, were crossing the road. It was then it happened, the accident. The truck hit them (classic reincarnation death of the mc lol) And then they you know...died :p

(the main character of the story is A btw)

Our main character A who you know just died, her conscious was like "damn so this is how I die?" and everything went black but that was not the end of her story.

Suddenly, A could hear voices of a person talking to themselves.

"who in theirs right mind would abandon a baby?"

A is of course confused as to what is happening as she just literally seconds ago died and came to know that she's in fact alive when she was able to open her eyes and sees the person who was carrying her.

"ayo did I ACTUALLY got reincarnated!? I know I said I wanted to get reincarnated but- you know what I'll take it, cause that truck really HIT like I'm pretty sure me and my bestie flew and died on impact or sth" was what A though upon realizing that she got reincarnated.

Fast forward

A is now 3 years old and during the 3 years she got a new name "xia". She has been observing her surrounding and also is trying to figure out where she reincarnated into. As she had read and watched a bunch of anime and manga/manhwas and also talked to her friends and with B about it.

So she assumes that she's most likely is in a game or anime or novel or manga. The only problem was that she could not figure out where she got reincarnated into, was this world an anime or a novel or a manga/manhwas or was it a game?

A being confused "ugh! How the hell am I supposed to find out what anime or a novel or a manga/manhwas or game this world is!? I read 4-6 mangas/ manhwas which usually aren't completed a day or go through 2-3 anime or play a game or two.

And then go WEEKS upon weeks without so much so as not even TOUCHING an anime or manga. I relay on my tabs and search history to guide me back to where I last watched or read.

I don't even usually REMEMBER the characters and refer to them by their hair colour or the plot"

So Xia (A) puts a hold to that and continues observing and interacting with her surrounding. She find out that the area she's currently in is an orphanage and is in a rural and neutral area so far.

There were kids from various age groups, from babies to young teenagers with all kinda of hair and eye colours.

(that's it for now, hope you enjoyed the story so far and if you have any questions feel feel to ask. I'll reply when I got the time since it's night time where I am so I'm going to sleep :D

Hope you liked the story and have a good day or night! <3

[rockingtheorange]

Get to know me!

Last song: Enemigos - Sebastian Llosa 🎶

Last film: Ron's gone wrong🤖😆

Currently reading: Wolfs-kinder by Vera Buck (a Christmas present)

Currently watching: Last Twilight (GMMTV series) / Percy Jackson (Disney series)

Currently consuming: pasta :)

Currently craving: corn cocktails I had in Mexico😣

Were you named after anyone?

As far as I know no, in Italian my name means happiness/joy. But the name I chose for myself is named after the ocean ☺ (Talay means ocean/sea in Thai)

When was the last time you cried?

I've been crying at night, before sleeping. I spent a month with my girlfriend and going back to long distance on the other side of the planet hit me harder than a truck🧸

Do you have kids?

Nope, and I don't plan on having them. I'm already struggling managing myself lol

What sports do you play/have you played?

Many when I was little: swimming, tennis, basketball... my parents wanted their children to try many things but I've always been artisty and I stuck to ballet for 5 years, then paused it for a few and came back for another 2/3 years. Then I went for theater ☺🤸

Do you use sarcasm?

Me? No. I don't use sarcasm, I AM sarcasm. But depends on the language I'm speaking honestly (different language - different personality is a real thing lol)

What's the first thing people notice about you?

I've absolutely no idea, but for some reason they always get my vibe wrong. People think I'm cold and quiet but if they earn my trust, I'm very warm and love physical touch

What's your eye color?

Brownish? Idk people have told me they look orange at times (???) or green under direct sunlight 😃 Let's say a light brown? copper maybe???🤭

Scary movies or happy endings?

I like both. Depends on my mood. (One of my fav series is scary with sad ending and all my fav movies are happy endings)

Any talents?

Some would say many, others would say none. I'd say I try my best in everything I do and talent is often a misused concept that only appreciates something you were born with instead of what you've worked hard on (even worse if people call talent the skill you've spend time and tears on)

Where were you born?

Milan 🙂 (fun fact I was kinda ☠ing and doctors had to remove my right kidney cause I had a tumor. All fine ever since tho☺👍)

What are your hobbies?

Many, I mostly make my hobbies collide with my growth in knowledge and working opportunities. Everything from writing, watching videos, playing videogames, listening to music, spending time in nature...

Do you have any pets?

2 meows 🐱🐱

How tall are you?

Shmall! I'm always the smallest one🥲 1,60 m 🤏

Favorite subject in school?

Def art class when I was little, then maybe math cause it has always been very easy for me. (But I used to love a subject depending on the topic and my own willingness to study it lol)

Dream job?

I'm trying to get a job as a 3D animator but it's hard. I just want to work in the cinema industry honestly 🥺 maybe travel from time to time...

A bit late but thank you @meraki-yao for the tag, you're always lovely ☺❤

Tagging someone that I hope hasn't done it yet: @manic-pixie-fever-dream @mylucayathoughts @couldvebeenus @onpurposeilovehimonpurpose

[subskz]

NOW. LEE FUCKING MINHO….WHEN I GET YR FUCKEN ASS

ohhhhh this mf had me FUMING HSJSNS had 2 take several breaks before i punched a hole thru my monitor,,, when he made the “joke” about asking for forgiveness on yr knees i was ready to pummel him in his beautiful fucking face he got me FAWKED UP!!!!!! but it’s p sexy when him and y/n fight ngl like my petty scorpio ass gets it and it kinda hurts too bcuz he’s just tryna protect chan 🥹 missus rin out here creating complex layered characters ikdfr

y/n feeding chan when he’s sick,,, and their convo about the binary stars DAWG. that’s gotta b the most romantic shit i ever heard in my life stfu 🥲 CHAN CRYING WHILE EATING HER OUT GOT ME BY THE THROAT BTW SAWRY LIKE IT PROB ISN’T SUPPOSED TO BE HOT BUT IT WAS SCRUMPTIOUS 2 ME,,, then everything that came after,,, girl i ain’t even gonna pretend 2 b a bad bitch i fucking cried. idk how but you fr have this amazing talent for writing emotions beautifully but not like romanticized yanno?!?! it just feels so raw

the last line of this part hit like a truck btw 🫡 i’m literally in love wit you and this series thx for another banger chappie girlie queen i gotta feeling tht things are gonna get even crazier in the next one

LMFAOOO the way i just knew ur next ask would be abt a certain lee minho…i’m not saying i encourage you to bodyslam him but i will conveniently look away if you do 😽

i did definitely make lino nastier than he needed to be hehe despite how infuriating he is it’s admittedly pretty fun to write >:) the scene where he tries to stop the reader from checking on channie was actually the first snippet i ever wrote of bb! but i’m so glad that his intentions are coming across properly despite his terrible methods haha i had a few misgivings abt portraying minho that way so it’s a relief that his reasoning seems to be understood!

PLEASE that makes me so happy to hear 😸 the binary stars part was a bit of a guilty pleasure u know i just couldn’t resist some corny lovey dovey space talk…it is channie after all! and don’t worry abt that HAHA i understand you on a fundamental lvl…probably not the most appropriate time to be a dacryphiliac but smth abt that emotional openness in moments of intimacy is just so good <3

and what a high compliment thank you so much babe!! i’m so touched you think so, esp since evoking emotion is one of my biggest struggles when it comes to writing ㅠ i don’t really see it as my strong suit so it means the world to me that bb3 could stir those feelings in you! i’m also very sorry if it caused some tears i think this entire series has turned out a bit heavier than i’d intended…i hope the happier parts balance it out 😭 thank you so much for always being so enthusiastic in ur msgs, it’s such a joy to read what u have to say and you’ve encouraged me so much w ur kind words! i love u right back my dear ♡

[thelostdisaster82]

So once again ……

It all makes sense! From the white sand in my bed and only my side of the bed sheets comforter and mattress and pillows all wet the water next to the bed every time I get up in the middle of the night. My neighbor who knows a bunch of useless knowledge or at least pretends he does,. To me when they get talking I tone them out but for some reason there are few things my brain remembers….

1.“dry drowning.”

(When this airway closure happens and no water goes into your lungs, that’s technically dry drowning, explains Dr. Milk. “The injury happens from a lack of air and asphyxiation.”)

2. reflex called a laryngeal spasm.

3. Pulmonary edema

(causes you to have trouble breathing or experience frightening sensations like shortness of breath and chest tightness. “Liquid, or fluid, is actually in your airway,” he continues. “You’re kind of drowning in your own fluid, even though you’re not in the water.”)

4. Heavy, persistent coughing.

Shortness of breath or trouble breathing.

Fever

Dry mouth or foaming at mouth

Skin discoloration

So my neighbor old roommate was at his house grant u we haven’t seen her in few months since we had falling out bcuz I’m pretty sure she was screwing my husband . I called her out on it and she quit coming around or speaking to us. Or me at least I thought.

When we went over there she pops off with

Drowning would be a shitty way to die. I mean u just can’t breathe screw that. … i mean the cops done took my truck spray it down looking for blood on it couldn’t pin shit on us anyhow so fuck it!

My husband like ya hahaha

My neighbor says right then …

My neighbor starts going on about pulmonary edema Heavy, persistent coughing. Shortness of breath… their lungs fill up and they just quit breathing. Your lungs stop functioning correctly.

Idk wth the whole conversation ever came from bout drowning or anything and I was just completely flabbergasted.

And it hit me like a ton of bricks today.

My husband always telling me he gonna kill me and make it look like accident.

This would be exactly that. Im not a smoker yet when I walk from bedroom to bathroom im outta breathe my skin color has been off kinda grayish white and I feel like I’ve got something stuck in my throat all the time and I can’t seem to drink enough and Always have extremely dry mouth. Fevers on and off and the absolutely worst headache of my life and my legs and stomach and face are swollen.

The sad part is I just don’t fucking understand why someone who has done absolutely everything I could possibly do for him and yet he would want to hurt me like that? Craziness! It breaks my whole heart. Why would he do that to me? I know the other two people are fucked up sick twisted mf who I still ain’t scared of. Any man that has to sleep with pistol on his chest has some pretty fucked up demons and he says he shoots when they run well coward if ur gonna shoot me ur gonna look at me when u do it cuz I am not afraid to die….do me a favor but knowing the person u love would devise a plan like that? And as far as the fat bitch….I thought u was my friend but all u are is left overs has beens …with bleached out crotch panties….leave that shit at ur own house oh that’s right ……u don’t have one u lost it! I used to feel sorry for u but now I know why ur best friend friend fucked ur bf it’s called karma for doing the same to someone who didn’t even know ur ass yet I made ur bf look like bitch n took ur truck back left him on side of gas station looking like Edna bcuz u had to move out and he had taken ur truck. But it’s all good ! U will always be third wheel in ur threesomes…mf laugh at u bout ur sad notes u wrote them bout being third wheel … but my own husband to stoop down to this is beyond me. Gag is up Check mate mfs u lose….I’ll always be smarter than u! Not to mention I am Not a Holy person but I’m perfectly protected by my God! So kick rocks and eat fish heads…if something happens to me they know where to go!

[dzpenumbra]

3/30/23

Today was a pretty cool day. I thought I caught up on sleep, but apparently I didn't because I've been exhausted all day. I did that yoga routine I enjoyed yesterday again, it was just as nice today. Ate on the floor and watched YT, then showered. Then I called back the health center. They had left me a message this morning, they got me in with a new doctor. I got set up with an appointment tomorrow at 3:15. Just a 15 minute get-to-know-you kinda thing, I guess... same as before... But I strongly doubt they do more than 15 minutes for anything but surgery anymore. Shit's crazy. So yeah, we'll see how that goes.

Then, I strapped my new board to my backpack, got on my hybrid board and rode up to the local skatepark. It was only about... idk, less than 2 miles, I'd say. Uphill the whole way. But... my electric board made quick work of that.

I tried riding in the bike lane... and accidentally hit someone's side view mirror with the wheel of my board strapped to my back. I felt really bad. I didn't mean to. I just... there was only one lane on the left side, and I ride regular... and the board is on my back... and the lane is like... really fucking narrow... I don't think it did any damage, I just... I felt bad. It made me anxious.

I found the park very easily and it was just... complete DIY thrown together hometown crust park. And I was totally cool with it! It reminded me of the park I skated growing up in my hometown. And it was tucked away on what used to be an old tennis court, and it was really set back into nature, so it was nice to be around trees again and all that. When I got there, a kid came over to me. It was the kid who sold me my board and recommended the place! XD He and a friend were skating. They were really good, I was impressed. And humbled. And I just sorta... did my thing. Second session of the season, first one at this park, just... trying to find things I felt comfortable doing.

I think I was there close to 2 hours. I got nosemanual-shuv back, which was a cool feeling. Which should mean nollie shuv isn't far off. Which means pop shuv is somewhere in the ballpark eventually. Nollie is coming back slowly, ollie is getting really dialed in. Front 1s are going okay, there was this really beat up old funbox there and I did one off the side of one of the kickers. It took a few tries, I was feeling really unsteady landing fakie on loose trucks, it's still a new experience for me, but I got it there. I got a few BS noseslides on a little concrete curb, and on the coping of a low manny pad too, which was cool. I have BS so much better than FS, they feel so different. I honestly don't know how to carry my weight on FS, I think I sit way too far "forward" (while moving backwards) and I just slip out... or I sit all my weight entirely on top of my nose and it just stalls and I basically pivot quickly to fakie. I'll have to play around with my weight a bit, I think, I'm guessing that's probably what's doing it.

More and more people started flooding in, which I was not used to at all. And after a while, I realized I was just kinda... standing around and not really skating much. I was pretty anxious. I had headphones in, everyone else there seemed to know each other, for the most part. I was the oldest one there by a fucking longshot, and it made me a bit self-conscious. I feel like when people see someone in their mid-30's at a skatepark, they expect them to like... be good. And I'm really not that good, honestly. Just being realistic. I have experience, I can do some tricks, but I wouldn't say I'm... "good". So... since I was feeling anxious, I went over to the opposite side of the park from where I had been camped, to just... go outside my comfort zone.

I started skating that manny pad, it was like... 8 inches tall? I really wish they had an even lower one, but it's a nice height. So... I decided at one point... "I'm going to ollie up onto it." Not really the most "impressive" thing in the world, since I can literally ollie like... I don't know, more than twice that height. But I didn't go for it because it was "impressive", I went for it because I was scared of it. I was scared of hanging my back trucks, as always. Or... just some unknown fear of like "you're gonna fuck it up and wreck" or something, that force that just glues your shoes to the ground. And I was just like... no... No... I really just didn't want that to fucking win. And I wanted to push against it and prove it wrong. So I did one tiny practice ollie over a crack in the pavement and said fuck it and went for it and did it first try. No problem at all. No one even noticed! XD Of course, I mean... what would they be noticing? They had no idea the battle going on in my head, for all they knew that was an everyday trick for me.

Most of the ramps had big puddles of water and crap at the base of them, but I found a few skatelite ramps that were clean and dry and tucked away at the back of the park, so I went for it. I was playing around with different powerslide and pivot powerslide combinations. I like them, they're weird. Drifting powerslide rotations on skatelite feels similar to doing what I used to call "spin slides" on snowskates, but it has a lot more grip and friction so you can actually control it a lot more rather than just kinda dialing in how much force you need to throw into the rotation and then praying to all the gods you choose to worship. I did a lot more than I was planning. I can pretty comfortably do both FS and BS powerslides on a bank now, and BS pivot powerslide is one of my go-to fun tricks so that's definitely in the bag. What I tried to do was basically... I over-rotated one of the powerslides and I realized that with more force I could probably keep the rotation going. So I took the FS powerslide and tried to turn it into a full 360 powerslide, coming back down the ramp fakie. Again... I had the whole... not used to riding loose trucks fakie problem. But... I did land it. One or two were a bit segmented, like powerslide... split second pause... second powerslide. But I did get a pretty smooth one. And I did one where I reversed the rotation and rewinded it, which was cool feeling but I have no idea how it looked.

That session on the ramp was pretty fun and I really started getting creative and trying new things. The ramp was much steeper than anything I've really ridden before, definitely steeper than the banks back at the old hometown park. But I started to get used to it pretty quickly. Oh, and I also did ollie to fakie and FS 1 on it, so that was cool. I really think I just need to put in the hours to get comfortable and used to being on a board in a lot of different positions. That made a huge difference with snowskating. Just cruising and getting used to my boardfeel in different situations. Like... two of the best things I did just in general for snowskating were to 1) just cruise the sidewalks and bomb the hill at the park, and 2) practice landing ollies with a decent amount of speed. Getting used to how it felt to be on the board at different angles and different speeds, with different foot positions was very helpful all-around, and with the ollies, landing... practicing landing on a super low-friction object and riding away with a decent amount of momentum helped a ton in overall confidence in landing shuvs and flips at any speed. So... I need to build up that familiarity with my board, and that will come in time. Especially if I keep riding my electric board too, being on a board will be complete second nature to me if I use it to travel literally everywhere.

After all that, I decided to call it. There were storms predicted tonight, and the prediction did come true. And I was just... exhausted, and knew I still had to ride home. So... off I went. And the ride back was all downhill, which was nice. It was fine. Until... I came across a broken needle in the fucking street. And it just... really upset me. Because I felt a lot safer than I expected to throughout the day. I had been building up so much anxiety and paranoia, and then I went and it was like... college kids and people walking their dogs and shit. And I was just like... "wow, these are like... normal people." And then those fucking junkies had to throw my anxiety one fucking shred of evidence. Which is all that fucker needs sometimes. Ugh. So... I can plot out a different route there if needed? I can try, at least? Maybe it's just that one section of town that's a bit run-down, I don't know. Ugh. It just left a bad taste in my mouth, you know? So yeah, I just... had to look past that, I guess. And keep my eyes forward.

Since I got back, it's been pretty chill. I'm exhausted. I did more desire path project work, up to 60 runs now, the path is still not forming in-game, but my map is coming along nicely. I think I'm going to shoot for 100 runs, then maybe start a new path from one of the established points or something. Not sure yet.

And while I was making dinner, I tried to make a salt solution so I can try to grow my own salt crystals. It's been on my to-do list since the week I moved in. I followed the instructions and everything, I'm just... there was a TON of salt leftover, so I don't know if the solution will be saturated enough? But we'll see, I guess. It's going to sit and separate tonight, then tomorrow evening I'll filter it and then probably set up my first batch and then... in a few weeks, I should have some homegrown crystals. Pretty cool.

And yeah, that's pretty much the day. New doctor visit tomorrow, therapy after, then who knows. But for now, I'm gonna go try pass out.

[cloveroctobers]

1st HAPPY BIRTHDAY. Second, is there anyway you could write an OJ Haywood fic where y/n is with him when he goes to find the one horse at the old town attraction thing and instead of OJ getting knocked out by Jean Jacket, y/n does? They’re dating btw. Thanks!

YONDER | OJ HAYWOOD

A|N: Thanks for the bday wish 🫶🏽!! I know this was requested forever ago but…life you know!? Anyways it’s here and I always try to make my work shorter thinking that way I’ll be able to put content out quicker but that rarely goes my way! I’m trying y’all! Fun fact: wanted to take a break from writing this month but…idk if thats likely… (let’s see when i disappear next lmao) we’ll see! Hope the wait was worth it and that you enjoy!

WARNINGS: language? Religion + v*mit? Possible wrong usage of the word, “yonder,” idfk, I have southern grandparents and thats the first time I heard the word lol. I think that’s it!

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this was kinda stupid.

Normally you did not find joy hating on something someone was passionate about but internally? You were surely screaming, ‘fuck those horses!’ The moment dear OJ decided he wanted to get Lucky back from Jupiter’s claim.

Even Em stared at you as if you had also lost your mind, jumping up to follow after your boyfriend and her very persistent brother.

“I know y’all not finna leave me here with Hispanic Green Day and with that thing lurking around out there?” Em voiced.

OJ ignored his baby sister, carrying on to his truck while you reluctantly followed.

Angel muttered, “I don’t know if I’m meant to be offended by that but…Green Day has hits.”

“Yeah, yeah whatever. I still see you’re going through your angst phase and you’re what? Twenty-one or something?” Em fanned her hand, turning back to you two before Angel could defend himself and spew that he was still going through a fresh heartbreak, “are y’all serious?”

Squeezing the patterned crochet hat further over your hair and let out a deep sigh, “nope,” you popped the, ‘p,’ before glancing over at OJ who started up the truck, “but wherever this guy goes…”

Em scoffed as OJ began to reverse and turn around to exit the ranch, “you’re right beside ‘em. Fine. Just hurry up and get your asses back here, I don’t have the best feeling about splitting up!”

“Slight work.” OJ called out to his sister through the window, two fingers in the air while she nervously chewed down on her bottom lip, watching as you two began to take the long trail out of the ranch.

This was just like her childhood all over again.

Em could feel Angel’s eyes burning on the side of her face which resulted in her giving the bleached twenty-something year old the side eye, “don’t start, angel.”

Angel moved his fists from his hips to raise them in surrender, “I didn’t say anything!”

“Yeah but I know you were thinking it!” Em pointed.

Sooner than you hoped, you and OJ made it to the parking lot of the theme park quite quickly. There were cars scattered around but not as busy as it could be. As you stood on the outside of the passenger side, you scrunched up your nose, honey brown circular glasses lifting as you did so, staring up at the blazing sun. That seemed a bit more comforting than the clouds lately…however the heat seemed to be glaring at you, almost warning you to go back the way you came.

“You ready?” OJ tapped your waist, gaining your attention.

Taking a small inhale you stepped forward, following after OJ, almost jogging to keep up with him, soon falling into step beside him. OJ was always hard working and when he had his mind set on something, he would always find a way to pull through.

The front gate creaked behind you as your eyes searched the scarce park. A whole tumbleweed brushed by your feet while you took in the emptiness of the park. If you thought your stomach hurt before? It definitely began to increase along with the heavy beating of your heart.

Your eyes instantly shot to OJ’s, his own round hooded eyes always expressed what his mouth didn’t. He was almost thinking the same damn thing; instead of heading through the wooden gates, he tapped your forearm with a nod of his head.

“In and out. Quick…depending on lucky. We’ll be alright.” He encouraged.

If it was anyone else, you probably wouldn’t have believed that. Yet OJ could always reassure you with those eyes and a brief touch. Honestly he didn’t want you to come with him but he didn’t have the time to start an argument. Plus with you by his side? His best company, his companion, good luck charm, and half of his heart? He had the confidence to do what he needed to do versus doing what he wanted or was chosen to do.

Slowly you trailed after OJ who, on the other hand was taking quick strides while you glanced around at each building. It felt incredibly eerie being here at a once lively western themed place turned ghost town—with not a person in sight.

This was not normal.

Before you know it, you’re hugging yourself as you loop through the entrance to the arena…feeling the walls almost suffocating you as you kick up dirt with each step.

OJ’s kissing his lips at Lucky, attempting to get the black beauty’s attention, who stood inside of what appeared to be a glass box. Glancing at the empty red bleachers, it didn’t take you long to guess what Jupe had been up to. First his invitation, to Lucky held hostage in a box, and now there’s no one around for his big showcase?

It’s not adding up.

Turning your head back to lucky who would not move, it was your turn to click your tongue against your bottom tooth. Another sound that seemed to work with the horses, followed by OJ continuing to make his own. With the new added sound from you, you could see Lucky slightly tilt his head in your direction.

“That’s it!” OJ yelled, thinking the both of you were getting somewhere.

“If only I brought my bag of parsnips, we’d be leaving by now.” You muttered, now squatting down, ready to clap to get lucky to at least move more than an inch.

Before you could slap your hands together, OJ quickly gripped your shoulder—immediately making you stare up at him in question. One finger followed, up to his lips as he peered up at the sky allowing you to see it—Jean jacket sliding behind its cloud.

Shuffling back, still crouching, you widened your eyes while OJ began to lower his voice, constantly glancing back and forth between the sky and his beloved horse. “Lucky!” He whisper-yelled.

Your eyes were focused on the sky now. The sun did not shine as bright on this side of Jupiter’s claim. In fact it was much cloudier, colder, it was much more unsettling and as the wind began to pick up…so did Jean jacket. You held your breath expecting it to dive right in for the black horse; instead it spluttered right towards the both of you.

The saucer-like creature knew that it had other guests to devour and you struggled to get upright as OJ failed to loop a arm around your ribcage and yank you out of the way. It all felt like slow motion with OJ missing you and fighting to keep his eyes on the territorial creature.

You were never good with distance. It never served you well and you were often teased by your own family; that was why you were the only one who needed some glasses, being far-sighted and all. Although your eyes were focused mainly on the sky after OJ brought it to your attention, you assumed Jean jacket was out yonder, much further than it appeared than this very moment.

As OJ scrambled back, still reaching out for you, screaming your name to what fell on deaf ears, he fought with the dirt as Jean jacket almost spit it in his eyes. And as the wind continued picking up, jean jacket got even closer, allowing the both of you to see just the opening of its mouth. OJ grappled, watching as a chill ran over his frame, while the pressure from Jean jacket flipped you onto your torso.

Your screams on the other hand, were not unheard.

OJ tussled (from being knocked back onto his bottom as well) to get to your outstretched hands. Which seemed to upset Jean jacket even further as you suddenly gripped your nails deep into the dirt, however you seemed to be getting dragged inch by inch. Next, the creature did not have much patience, deciding to lift the walls of the arena.

Would it collapse?

It barely held in the first place as wood began to fall in between the space of you and OJ. You could feel your nails cracking and beginning to bleed but that did not stop you from holding on.

There wasn’t much you knew about this UFO but the spluttering from it signaled that it was agitated with you two. Wrestling to lift your head up at OJ, it was your turn to watch in horror as another slab of wood went flying in his direction, slapping his face with a impact that shifted his entire body to one side. You couldn’t scream for him because the next thing you know, your body was lifting itself and you were flung to the side of the walls with a scream of your own.

It felt like two sacks of sands were sitting over your eyes and you fought like hell to get them open. Maybe if you kept them closed longer, you wouldn’t feel the immense pain that was beginning to settle in. You groaned, trying to move your limbs but you felt something holding your face in place.

That’s when your body jolted upwards with a shock, not knowing where you were and what was happening.

“Hey, hey, hey. Baby, it’s me.” OJ’s voice was heard and you instantly relaxed but visibly winced.

Your vision wasn’t straight and it was hard to focus on OJ’s features but one thing is for sure? You could smell blood, whether it be from his body or your own—that stench was evident.

“Looks like we’ve been out for awhile,” His knuckle brushed against your cheek as you tried to focus on your breathing, “How you feeling?”

Huffing out air from your nostrils, a snarky response was written on your stained face but you blinked multiple times to see a figure at the opening of the arena. “Like I should fight that—that—animal over there or hug it.”

Another round of red flags silently went off in OJ’s head as you stuttered trying to figure out Lucky’s name. Without question, his fingertips moved around your coils feeling for what he suspected and earning a loud hiss from you.

Slapping his wrist, “stop touching me! Let me go back to sleep, please.”

“There’s a first,” OJ lightly joked while you lolled your head around a bit, “you definitely been concussed. And we can’t stay here any longer.”

“Hm?” It was your turn for the short replies now.

Gently but firm, OJ got you to your feet and tried to lean you against what was left of the arena’s walls while he went towards lucky who patiently waited. He whistled him over, thrilled that he actually came to him as he whispered sweet nothings to the animal, patting his backside and encouraging him to lead the way out of Jupiter’s claim.

He noticed you sliding against the wall and rushed over to you, catching you before you slid back against the ground. “Stay with me, baby.”

“Always.” You gargled, finding your footing.

OJ tried to steady you but found this situation to be difficult. It was dark out and no one wanted to be out in the dark with Jean jacket lingering in the clouds. That was almost more frightening than the day time. So OJ sniffed, pinching his nostrils before he easily lifted you into his arms and began to speed walk beside lucky who trotted along.

“Phone.” OJ tried to not scratch at his already crusted over wound on his forehead as he sat beside you in the driver’s seat.

When he didn’t get any service with his simple flip phone, he searched the passenger seat for yours, finding it underneath the seat. And of course a flashing red battery was what he was met with. OJ sucked his teeth, tossing the glove compartment open for the extra car charger that (you purposely left) fit the more “up to date phones” and plugged yours in.

Looks like he wouldn’t be calling anyone for this thirty minute drive. OJ glanced at you, making sure that you were buckled in before he took the car out of park.

“Hey, babe. Where’s my—what do they call them? Spectacles. The extra things I need to see.” You pointed at your eyes, your head rolling around on the head rest.

OJ kept peering over at you as he drove pass a gas station followed by some hills, “shit, your glasses? Yeah. They were completely broken back there, sorry about that. I think you left your old pair back at the house, up in my room. You’ll be alright.”

“Yeah…I’ll just be blind as fuck for the rest of the night.” You slurred, “I really want to sleep.”

“No! No, keep those pretty eyes open for me.”

“You’re pretty.” You mocked, making the man smirk at you in the night.

“I’ll even put on some music, keep you awake.”

“Some gospel?”

OJ was shocked at that.

“You really want to hear gospel?”

“I know you’d rather listen to…dill pickles?”

“…what, y/n?” OJ sighed, he knew that was a cartoon but he just knew you were trying to tease him about some genre he didn’t listen to.

“That country singer. Kane something.” You sighed, “I can’t think straight…my head hurts.”

“I know, we’ll get you some ice soon. I promise, we just need to get in doors before—

OJ trailed off as he actually turned the radio on for you. He twirled the nozzle in search of the gospel station. You came from a religious background and that’s how OJ met you, through his mother, when the Haywood’s would attend your father’s church every other Sunday.

That of course faltered when his mother passed when he was around twelve or so. His father tried to keep up with attending, knowing that’s what his wife would have wanted but soon found the horses took up much more of his time along with raising two kids all on his own. Thankfully OJ still got to see you at school…and you’ve been together since you were seventeen.

Now just hold on (hold on)

Change is coming (change is coming)

Hold on (hold on)

Don't worry (don't worry 'bout a thing)

Hold on (hold on)

You can make it (you can make it)

Hold on (hold on)

Everything (everything will be alright)

Is gonna be alright

“I love this song.” You sniffed, your voice soft.

OJ knew that, which is why a feeling told him to stop here after messing with staticky stations. It was one of your comfort songs and that’s all he wanted to bring you after the both of you were basically fighting for your lives miles ago.

And when you reached your battered hand out for his, OJ didn’t hesitate to interlock your fingers together. Then slowly you felt the prickle of his facial hair on the back of your hand as he placed a kiss there. A small smile graced your dry lips while OJ held onto your hand, with the other gripping the wheel, his body sitting up, which meant he was about to float this piece.

You were his happy place and he was your safety.

And he didn’t let go of your hand for the rest of the night. Not even when you arrived at the ranch, the jolting of the land making you puff your cheeks.

“I need to throw up.”

Thankfully the both of you weren’t far from the house, OJ spotting Angel’s van not too far from his own now parked truck.

“Okay. You need me to help you out?” OJ asked, although the thought of watching you puke made his own stomach turn.

Freeing your hand, you held it up to him, your other shaky hand reaching around to unbuckle yourself. OJ dipped his head as he began to unbuckle himself and open the door. That feeling came around again, almost like a whisper, telling OJ to look up.

And when OJ caught Jean jacket, hovering above with a triangle rainbow garland hanging from it…Immediately he got back into the car with a slam of the door. He quickly turned to you, already waiting for his eye and you gently shook your head with a hand over your mouth.

“Uh uh.” You managed to get out, lips tightly pressed together and a face so pale in the moonlight.

OJ held out his hand, palm up for you to place your hand back in his, “Nope.”

It was decided, no matter the yonder between you two and Jean jacket, the both of you agreed to stay put in the car for the night…

And the horse statue that collided with your side of the windshield…only made your plans for the night, much more clear.

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Continue along with my summer anthology prompts here.

[kailoraurelius]

tell us more about how you came up with stained glass

🥺

👉🏻👈🏻

Oh my, that's something I haven't thought of in a while lol. Well, honestly, it started accidentally. I kinda wanted to write a fake dating au, just for fun. I wrote maybe the first chapter and a half one day, closed the document, and then forgot it for over a year. I like to periodically return to my old works to see if inspiration strikes and so I found it again one day. Just a couple pages of directionless writing. And it suddenly hit me that I wanted to continue it. So I did. Just started writing it and having fun with it. Didn't even think of posting it until it was many, many chapters long.

But the main base for it was just the idea of Chloe convincing Beca to let her put Stained Glass in normal windows of their place. I had that thought and couldn't put it down. Then it combined with my favorite trope of fake dating and just sorta ran away with me lol. And in more direct ways, things were influenced in the story by my own background. I grew up in Louisiana, not far from where the movie was filmed so it made sense for Beca to grow up there. I had those backyard dinners and lakeside hangouts. We had a jump tree, though ours was never hit by lightning. My neighbors were the Lessard family and I spent much of my life in the back of trucks.

For Chloe, much of the inspiration came from the character herself. What makes a character so friendly, open, and loving? Growing up surrounded by that. So I made her family just that.

And idk, I'm sure there's more specific things that informed the story, but basically I just wrote it because it was fun to write dumb banter and loving friends and family. 🤷

[owaowabetch]

Uh Oh (Sykkuno x F!Reader)

Oneshot (maybe part of a series??? idk we’ll see): The Prequel to “Impasta” in which reader meets the gang for the first time and experiences a betrayal. Mainly Friendship

Warning: non-beta, I wrote this in one go and full sent it. 

You were a small time Twitch streamer that had recently befriend a streamer with a much larger audience, ValkyRae.  You had been talking back and forth for quite some time, since Rae’s dm to you weeks ago. You were mainly an rp channel where you played games like GTA, The Sims, and Animal Crossing. Though you gained a lot of your followers from playing League, though it mostly consisted of hate-followers that would only critique your gaming, even though you were pretty good at it. But it doesn’t bother you too much *que sob*

You were streaming GTA on a RP server playing an amish girl on a Rumspringa and wreaking havoc. You and your ‘gang’ had successfully finished hitting a bank truck ,causing your character to rake in a few thousand dollars, when you got a message from Rae asking you if you had wanted to play a few rounds of the popular game among us. 

“Alright guys, a friend asked if I wanted to join her lobby of among us. I know it’s different from the stuff i usually stream, but is that something you guys would be cool with?” You asked your chat and watch an influx of people messaging ‘yes’ or ‘pog’. You take a sip of your Starbucks and picked up your phone to message Rae that you’ll be joining. “Fair warning, I’ve never played among us. So we’ll see how this goes, guys” 

While you waited to be invited to the discord and into the lobby, you chatted with your viewers for a bit. “I just realized that I’m really awkward around new people. Like when I’m playing on the GTA Rp Server, I’m not myself, I’m a character you know? So it’s easier to talk with other people, cause they’re also role playing. Plus I don’t think I can call anyone in the discord a musty dusty rat bitch lol or sell them drugs, it’s not that kind of game...unless?...” You laugh as you login to your discord and accept the invite to the discord “alright guys! here we go~”

You enter the discord call and hear people talking. 

“Y/N!” Rae exclaims “Guys this is my new friend y/n”

“Hi” Responding to the various voices greeting you

“OK, so the code is in the chat and so are the bubbles, so your chat can see who is talking and what not” Rae explains

You input the code and saw your little character in the space ship. “Oh god guys look at us!” You ran your little character around the ship “How do we change colors? I’m not feeling this blue and I saw Rae with her lil creepy mask”

You read your chat tell you what to do so you went to the little computer to change the blue to white and clicked through all the hats til you decided on the pink flower. “How about this guys? Yellow is my favorite color but its taken”

“Alright, you ready y/n?” Rae asked

“Yup” you respond by running circles around her character

“OK i’m starting. Don’t forget to mute and close chat. You can open it back up if your imposter or dead” Rae sang “Good luck~”

“Alright chat I gotta close you til the game is done? I guess” You hum as the words ‘crewmate’ pop up. “Well at least i’m not imposter, i know the game. I mean who hasn’t at this point. I just never played it, seems to be to nerve wracking”

You open the map icon and run to where the closet yellow exclamation point was, which was admin. You make sure to note all the colors around you in there as you swipe your card “Alright, green, yellow, brown,red, and orange” You repeated the colors over and over again as you make your way into electrical when you notice something “Ok uh green is following me? I don’t know why but its freaking me out.” The lights turn off and you start freaking out “Oh god, this is where I die. Don’t I? You know what do it. Kill me! It’s probably a good idea. I’m kind of an idiot and it’ll help me figure things out on my own without the pressure” You follow the arrow pointing to a panel and you click on it “What am i supposed to do? You know green, this would be the perfect opportunity to murder me in cold blood... is this how you do it?” You flip the switches so that they are all bright green and the lights turn on “YAS BITCH, I did it” 

The green character kind of just circles your body as you do tasks in electrical, you do download, wires, and power diverter. “Ok BUT WHY IS HE FOLLOWING ME!!” 

An orange body had been reported and that two others had died (bright green and pink) and the person who reported the body was black or as his name read ‘Abe’ “Ok, so this body was in admin on card swipe”

“Well this body couldn’t have been me or y/n” Sykkuno says “I was following her this entire time”

“Yea, I’d like to know why lol? You were kinda freaking me out dude” You laugh a bit trying to play off how nervous you were to call him out on it

“Oh No! I was protecting you” Sykkuno explains “I promise”

“Sykkuno? Are you already simping for someone?” Rae feigns exasperation 

“No really guys!” He explains nervously “The new person always dies first, so I was just trying to protect her.”

You hum and smile mischievously “Unless, your just trying to gain my trust only to murder me in coldblood in front of my bestie Rae, to prove your superiority over her!?!”

Rae gasps “Really Sykkuno!?! I’m voting you just for that!”

“Wah? No wait! It’s not like that really” Sykkuno starts laughing as Rae votes “Oh God did you really vote for me?”

“Yes” Rae says and you start laughing 

“So anyways, Leslie’s body is in admin?” Hafu says wanting to talk more about the body and get all the sus’s and clears

Though you gasp when you realized a few things “wait I have some info to share” teasing Sykkuno had loosened you up a bit “it was me,green,yellow,brown,red, and orange in admin. Then me and green, uh Syyykkkuunnoo? Sorry if i didn’t say your name right, left and went into electrical, then lights were called and I fixed them before finishing off my tasks in there. So the body must’ve died during lights unless she left and came back into admin after lights were fixed? which doesn’t make much sense, sooo yea” you smiled “look at me chat! being all smart and shit” 

“yes” Poki agrees “I left admin also with Rae just before lights were called”

“Ok, so I know that puts sus on me, but I went straight to lights when they were called” Hafu says “Someone on the right side must’ve vented when lights were off. Like I was entering the hallway from storage with Tina when lights got fixed and we went to reactor room together. So it couldn’t have been me. Maybe Tina? I dont know which way she come from, but it was not me”

“That is true. I did meet up with Hafu at storage, but I don’t know man” Tina says “ I was doing download in comms”

“Oh god” You tell chat “I don’t know whether to believe Hafu or not. I know she is really good, along with Toast, but he hasn’t said anything”

“Well it is seven and we don’t vote on seven, so we can skip. Just putting a sus on Hafu” Rae says

“Yes please do” Hafu says as she votes to skip

“Do we know where the other bodies are?” Poki asks as the seconds start to dwindle down to zero “Also Toast? Why are you so quiet?”

“I’m trying to figure out a new strat, so don’t you worry. I’ll catch the killers” Toast starts to evil laugh and that was the end of the meeting.

“Ok we’re susing Hafu for this.Though I don’t think it’s her only cause I remember watching one of her imposter plays and it would be a too obvious kill,since so many people were there, it just doesn’t make sense, so someone venting in and killing is plausible or could be a self report? I don’t know lol It’s my first game” You run with Sykkuno and finish up your tasks together. Though lights were called when you both were at shields, you can see the vent pop open and in your little vision bubble you see a flash of red “Whelp this is where I die, I’d like to rate Sykkuno an 8 out of 10 for protecting me, but obviously I am now died” True to your word Rae killed you and you saw Sykkuno running around like a headless chicken when he reports your body 

“Oh God! They got her when I was trying to protect her!” Sykkuno exclaims 

“Sykkuno! You were supposed to be protecting her!?” Rae shouts “What happened? Did you kill her in cold blood? hmm?”

“smh Rae, you murdered me right in front of Sykkuno” You sigh “Well chat looks like I’m dead and we can speak now”

“No!” Sykkuno denies “I said I was going to protect her. I wouldn’t kill her after saying that”

“Well she’s dead now Sykkuno! Where’s the body?” Toast dramatically says

“It’s in shields. It happened when lights were off” Sykkyno says “I’m sorry y/n, I couldn’t protect you”

“Aw that is so cute” You pout at his apology, it wasn’t his fault. It was dark, so obviously he couldn’t see

“Well I don’t think Sykkuno did this, He said he was protecting her to everyone, so I can say that he’s crew” Hafu says “I’m at light panel, I remember seeing Poki and Tina there”

“I can confirm this” Poki says “So Toast let’s hear your big brain play. What’s your strat?”

It was silent for a minute, before Toast admits that he doesn’t have one.

“Ok so we can all agree that Toast is the imposter right?” Rae says “Vote him outta here!”

“Yep” Tina agrees hitting that vote on him and many follow suit

“Wait guys! WAIT! I do! I do have a strat” Toast screams out “Uhhh... wires! The wires guys!”

“Lol they’re gunna vote him off” You watch people voting “Rae is probably gunna win this”

“Yea, you’ve done that pay before” Poki laughs

“Don’t worry I’ll skip Toast” Sykkuno says 

“Why would you skip if we’re on 6?” Rae asks “Is Toast your imposter buddy?”

“Wah? I said I was protecting y/n, why would I kill her?” Trying to make his innocence obvious 

“Unless you killed her by accident or Toast did and you’re trying to protect him like the Simp you are!” Rae accuses him

Tina starts to also question Sykkuno “Wait a second, I dont think I’ve seen you do a single task this entire game! You’ve just been following y/n all around! We should vote him off next!”

“Guys, I swear it’s not me, it just doesn’t make sense” You can hear him plead “Oh no guys, how did this get twisted? It’s Rae! But how did it go to thinking Sykkuno as imposter?”

The meeting ends with Toast screaming into the abyss as he is yeeted out with Sykkuno telling him that he voted to skip.

“Ok then chat, looks like the imposters are gunna win, lets talk for a bit” You sigh and start reading the comments “ I know that I didn’t talk much with them, but I’m just awkward in general and I don’t know what to say to them. This is the first time playing with a group like this where i’m supposed to be myself and not a character.”

The words Defeat appeared on screen and there was Hafu and Rae as imposter. “I honestly didn’t think it was Hafu”

“Hafu was that you that killed Leslie in admin? I didn’t think it was “You asked when you returned to the lobby

“NO! I got framed by my own partner” Hafu explains before taking her bathroom break

“How did Rae get that kill cause I was with her?” Poki asks

“I vented from Caf back into admin when lights were off” Rae laughs “and I vented into shields and killed y/n right in front of Sykkuno!”

“Im sorry for not being able to protect you” Sykkuno runs circles around my character “Next round I’ll do better! I promise”

You laugh and start chasing after him in the ship “What if you end up as imposter?”

“Then I’ll have to look away as my imposter buddy kills you” Sykkuno laughs behind his hand and clears his throat “Im joking, Im joking, I promise”

“Wow Sykkuno” You tsk and run over to the opposite side of the room “I don’t know if I want your protection services now”

“Uh” Sykkuno splutters “I’m joking I promise! I won’t kill you as imposter”

“Wait til Corpse hears you simping over someone else” Poki says before starting the game

“Wait Hafu is still in the bathroom!” Rae exclaimed, but it was to late to stop the game from starting, so she’ll have to jump in when she comes back. Though you swear you feel your heart jump out of your chest when the words Imposter read on you screen. The 1st of the night for you and another in a row for Hafu.

“Oh God guys. Hafu is in the bathroom, but she has to carry us” You start to panic “What we do we do!?! Wait is Sykkuno seriously gunna follow us? Should we kill him or would that be to obvious?” You see the chat tell you that it would be to obvious and that it would be better to maybe frame him, but it seems to mean to you “Should we kill someone in front of him? You know to test his loyalty? It’s a terrible idea”

Though before you go on to fake tasks, you see Sykkuno standing on top of Hafu’s body, so you also go ontop of Sykkuno’s and to the outside perspective you are protecting Hafu, but really for you it’s to ensure that your imposter partner is going to be walking around and killing people,once she comes back from the bathroom. It seems that Hafu is back from the bathroom as her yellow character starts making her way away from you both. You and Sykkuno make your way to admin when lights get called and Sykkuno starts to wiggle his body around into a corner. It seems as though he wants you to stack with him in a corner, but before you do you double back when you see a body pass by and kill them, though you start to laugh when you see your character kill Rae, before ‘stumbling’ into Sykkuno’s view in the corner. You both stay there as lights turn back on and go on card swipe. You think about juking Sykkuno, but realize that it’ll look sus on you for ditching him. So you two just walk around ‘completing’ tasks as every once in a while the lights would go off and you two will stack on each other or wait for doors to open which you had been closing alot of them. 

“Honestly guys I’m at a point were I just wanna murder someone in front of him” You start to evil laugh as you both stack in the corner of medbay as lights start turning on when a body got called

“It’s toast, it’s toast, it’s toast” Hafu chants as it was her who reported the body “I saw him kill Poki”

“oh she self reported” you note and click on Toast’s name but not locking in your vote just in case. You also noticed that four people had died “She killed three people!?! Wow she is beast in this game! Holy Shit guys”

“see, from my perspective it’s hafu. I didn’t see the kill, but I did see blood splatter and Hafu immediately reported the body and blamed me, so it has to be Hafu. I’m voting her” Toast explains and votes her

“no no no no no no no. I saw you kill her when lights got fixed.” Hafu describes her side and what she did in that round “ Ok guys I was afk for like the first 20 seconds and I see Sykkuno and y/n there standing on me in caf., and I’m just doing my tasks, which I finished by the way, so I’m just going back and forth going to cams and just walking around to find any dead bodies. So if you saw cams on in the last 30 or so seconds it was me. I’ve also been fixing lights too! Peter and Leslie should be able to vouch for me on that! But on this round of lights I’m making my way to go help fix them when i see blood flicker in my little bubble and as it starts to get bigger I see Toast walking away from it. Its Toast. It is 100% Toast.” She locks her vote on him “Vote him please. If you don’t vote then you’re either imposter or just throwing”

“I don’t know guys” You start and hover your mouse over the green checkmark next to Toast’s name “I’ve been with Sykkuno the entire round and we did guard Hafu’s body. For Hafu to say that she saw Toast kill, but toast didn’t see Hafu kill? It just doesnt make sense so I’m voting Toast” You lock your vote in when Hafu reminds everyone that crew has to vote together since it is on six. Reminding Peter and Leslie that Hafu has been fixing lights got their votes, but Sykkuno was hesitant “You know I can never vote Toast guys, but I have been with y/n this entire time and I know it’s not her. So, I’m sorry Toast but uh” He locks his vote in for either Hafu or Toast? Who knows if he’s simping over Toast hard.

“Sykkuno?” You can hear Toast tremble his voice “Sy-sykkuno? Who did you vote for? Sykkuno!?!?! Do- Don’t tell me...did you really vote me?”

“I uh “ He clears his throat as the votes get out and all of us had voted Toast 

Toast gasps “Sykkuno!?! How could you!?!?!”

“I’m sorry! I just trust y/n!” Sykkuno explains as Toast’s body once again gets yeeted out into space. 

“Wow guys, looks like we’re gunna win our first imposter game!” You wiggle around happily “and we literally did nothing...wait we killed Rae! We got our revenge from the last round mwua hahahahaha”

Sykkuno and I run circles around each other before walking back into medbay. You can see Hafu kind of trailing behind and the doors get locked with us three in it, but Hafu is just standing there. “Chat what is Hafu doing? Why is she just standing there” You can see Sykkuno step on the med scan “Wait she wants ME to kill SYKKUNO! Oh god that is so evil lol but i’m so useless as imposter, so I might as well get in at least 25% of the kills” 

Once Sykkuno steps off you just murder him and you see that you had won.

“I- I can’t believe you just killed me!?! I trusted you y/n” Sykkuno exclaims

“Sykkuno” Rae sighs “she KILLED ME in caf! Why did no one NOT SEE MY CHOPPED BODY IN CAF!”

You just laugh “I’m sorry Sykkuno, but my chat was telling me that Hafu wanted me to kill you”

“Yea, cause I did like all of the kills and sabotages” Hafu recounts who and how she killed 

“Sykkuno, you giant simp. I can’t believe you vote me” Toast tsk’ed 

“I can’t believe y/n was the imposter! and she killed me!” Sykkuno shakes his head “you know what i’m no longer protecting you anymore”

“Wait Sykkuno I’m sorry. Really” You giggle 

“No no no it’s ok, it’s all part of the game” Sykkuno reassure you that he is not actually mad and that he hoped you had fun “But i wont be protecting you from now on, I have scars now”

So, you play a few more games before calling it quits and end your stream. Later on, you find that Sykkuno started following you on Twitter and Instagram, You totally did not stalk both of his pages and you totally don’t think that he’s cute.....

SideNote: You totally murdered someone in front of Sykkuno and he totally didn’t snitch on you. Instead he protected you as you ran around killing more people in front of him and like the giant Simp he is he totally went ‘I neva snitch on you Daddy, I hold a brick for you Daddy’.

[hibiscus-candy]

@cryosphe​ Man.. good questions.. (i hope you don’t mind me answering in a seperate post)

- What got you into wordgirl/the fandom?

It was actually very gradual, someone I follow on twitter posted wordgirl fanart a few times. Then a few months followed where I didn’t think about it. Saw a few clips on youtube. Once again forgot about it. More clips, more fanart, and soon enough i was just bored with myself and decided to watch a few random episodes. (it was like being hit by a truck with nostaliga) Instantly in love. I knew right then I was being thrown into the thick of it. Speaking of the episodes, I watched them totally out of order lol.

- I notice that whenever it comes to drawing Steven/DTB you give him features that are typically attributed to those who are older. Any reasons as to why specifically? I mean I love it, but I’m just so intrigued…

To be totally honest with you... its a mix of just really having an appreciation for old people, and also a bit of an inspiration from how my father looked. My Dad started greying in High school (and so did I) and it always drew more attention to his fine lines, overall older appearance... also its just fun adding crows feet and all. But also! I Hc him in his early to mid 40s, he olde...

- When first drawing him (DTB) for the first time, did you experiment a little with the design? If so, what did you change/add? How is it different compared to the way you draw him now?

Idk dude I just started drawing, whatever comes out is what comes out. I still wasn’t posting back when i started drawing him so it was truly an unfiltered, unpolished time. I do mostly screenshot redraws when im figuring out a character. You’ve seen most of it before but heres the full first ever page:

Right before posting that grilled cheese comic, I was playing around with the idea of him recovering (obviously), and came to the conclusion that his experience with Squeaky should have aged him noticeably. So I added crows feet, and salt and pepper hair (even though you can’t really tell in the comic) And at the end of it, I was like, you know what, I really like the crows feet. So i decided to keep them. And at first I gave him crazy hair, then tried out a neater style, then i kinda forget about it untill I flipped back through randomly and thought to myself:

- I want more lore on his family 👹👹👹

OH MY GOD HIS FAMILY. I absolutely cannot create deep lore for the life of me 🙇 But heres what i’ve been thinking

-Amelia is the oldest and Stephanie the youngest. 

-Amelia has a few kids of her own and is PERFECTLY balancing a job on top of it. 

-Amelia is trying her best with Steven and is absolutely FILLED with guilt over how she unintentionally treats him.

-Stephanie is the closest with Steven

-Steven moved away from home to pursue higher education.

-Steven’s family love him very much, even now.

-Mami- the taller- rightmost mother, is indigenous. She was based off how my grandmother would always be described as ‘A tall, Indian woman’ by my cousins. However, thats about it. She doesn’t look like my grandma, and mine was far too mysterious to base a character off of anyways.

- Nah, but I’m curious about the family that you gave him. What’s the thought process behind that? Is there a reason for the two mothers or did you just do it cuz you wanted to?

Oh! So originally I thought a lot about him being from a picture perfect nuclear family (angst!) And it was cool and all. But one day I thought to base it off of some of the dynamics in MY extended family. And boy did it click! I come from a very women-dominated extended fam. With even a few all-women families in the mix. Its a very sweet and comfortable atmosphere, and when thinking of my brother and the men in this women-dominated family, I think it fits just right.

Once again there are a few all-women families in my circle. One of those is, yes, two old lesbians with some kids. I want it to be a little representation of the fact that there have always been queer families, even before legal recognition. And of the elder queers who thrived in their lives.

- WHAT HAPPENED TO STEVEN AND AMELIA’S RELATIONSHIP⁉️⁉️⁉️ 😭😭😭 Was it always this bad?

Oh man of course not! They got along as kids! Amelia is his older sister and wants whats best for him but she cannot wrap her head around what hes going through. She is very neurotypical, and Steven is very neurodivergent, and almost all of their friction comes from a lack of mutual understanding.

- Why can’t you draw Huggy❓❓❓ 👿👿👿

Animal drawing brain don’t work

- DTB is a dilf 👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽

👌👌👌

[kjack89]

TimeTravel! Au where established-relationship modern Enjoltaire accidentally go back in time to barricade day and meet canon-era-reluctant-frenemies Enjoltaire with a series of awkward misunderstandings. Or include all of the Amis, or a fluffy kidfic(or not, since they're in a middle of a warzone), idk you decide.

So I really let the ‘idk you decide’ do a lot of heavy lifting here in terms of what this prompt became. Sorry Nonny!

Time Travel AU (kinda/sorta), E/R, established and also not, Modern AU and also Canon. Referenced/implied canonical major character death.

The crowd was suffocating, a mass of bodies that jostled Grantaire from every side as he tried his best to push through, but he didn’t care. He had one singular goal: he had to get to Enjolras. 

He caught flashes through the crowd of Enjolras, using the hood of a car as a makeshift stage, shouting something into a megaphone that was drowned out by the roar of people, and though Grantaire’s temper was soured by having to shoulder his way through the masses just to get to his boyfriend, as always, even the briefest sight of Enjolras in his element was enough to make him smile.

A smile that quickly faded as Grantaire finally made it to the front of the crowd, only to see a platoon of police officers in full riot gear approaching.

“Enjolras!” Grantaire shouted, but his voice was lost over the noise of the crowd, especially as others had caught sight of the approaching cops. 

Enjolras glanced over his shoulder, his expression hardening as the police drew closer. “Citizens, stay calm,” he shouted through the megaphone, but the crowd was already beginning a panicked scattering.

Grantaire was knocked almost to the ground by folks trying to flee, and by the time he struggled to his feet, it was to see a police officer drawing up behind Enjolras, baton at the ready. “Enjolras!” Grantaire called, but it was too late: the police officer clubbed Enjolras in the legs, and Enjolras pitched forward, off of the hood of the car and out of Grantaire’s line of sight.

Grantaire’s blood ran cold, and he immediately started pushing back through the crowd, but he couldn’t seem to make any headway against the masses of people. His heart raced with pure terror as the cops all but surrounded the car that Enjolras had been standing on.

“No!” Grantaire screamed, clawing at the people dragging him in the opposite direction, away from where Enjolras had fallen. “No, Enjolras! Enjolras!”

He struggled in vain, wordless sobs punching from his chest as he watched a cop yank Enjolras upright by his hair, a trickle of blood running down Enjolras’s pale forehead. Somehow, Enjolras’s eyes found Grantaire in the crowd, and he mouthed something that Grantaire couldn’t quite make out. “No,” Grantaire gasped, as the cop raised his gun to Enjolras’s head.

And pulled the trigger.

“NO!”

Grantaire sat bolt upright in bed, his chest heaving, drenched in sweat. “Grantaire?” Enjolras asked sleepily. “Grantaire, what—”

He broke off when he saw the state Grantaire was in, sitting up immediately and gently touching Grantaire’s arm. “It’s ok,” he said, his voice quiet but firm, just loud enough to be heard over Grantaire’s harsh breathing. “You’re ok. It was just a nightmare.”

Grantaire swallowed, hard, and shook his head, but no words came. Instead he turned and buried his face against Enjolras’s shoulder, breathing in the scent of the man who was very clearly still alive, still here, still next to him. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice muffled against Enjolras’s shirt.

“For what?” Enjolras asked, stroking Grantaire’s hair. “For having a nightmare? I’m not entirely sure that’s something you can really control…”

Grantaire shook his head again and pulled away from Enjolras. “No, for not getting to you in time,” he said hoarsely.

Enjolras frowned. “In your dream?” he asked, and Grantaire nodded. “What happened?” Grantaire made a face and Enjolras’s frown deepened. “You dreamed I died again.”

It wasn’t a question, and for good reason. This was the fifth or sixth time in the past few weeks that Grantaire had been besieged by nightmares of Enjolras being killed, frequently enough that it was becoming a habit. And not one of Grantaire’s fun habits.

Not that Enjolras would consider most of Grantaire’s habits fun, but that was an argument Grantaire supposed could wait for another day.

He realized a moment too late that Enjolras had asked him something, and blinked at him. “Sorry?” he said, his voice still hoarse.

“I said, who was it this time?”

Enjolras’s voice was light, almost joking, and Grantaire knew that he was trying to make him feel better, even if it didn’t actually do anything to slow his still-racing heart or calm his still-shaking hands. “Cops,” he said.

Enjolras didn’t look surprised, just nodding slowly. “EDCAB,” he said, pronouncing each letter with no small amount of venom, and Grantaire gave him a startled look. “Even Dream Cops Are Bastards.”

Grantaire half-smiled. “Pretty sure dream cops are included in the ‘all cops’ part of ACAB,” he said.

“Sure, but it doesn’t hurt to specify.” Grantaire didn’t laugh and Enjolras’s forehead puckered with concern. “This is becoming a pattern,” he said. “Maybe you should talk to someone about it.”

Grantaire made a noise in the back of his throat, imagining the field day his therapist would have with this revelation. “I am talking to someone,” he said dismissively.

But Enjolras didn’t so much as a crack a smile. “You know what I mean.” He ran a hand up and down Grantaire’s arm. “There’s only so many times that I can tell you that you’re worrying for nothing, that I’m perfectly safe, that nothing’s going to happen to me. Especially since your subconscious doesn’t appear to be getting the hint.”

“In fairness, my subconscious is probably a better judge of the relative danger you put yourself in than you are,” Grantaire muttered, sliding away from Enjolras and standing up, grabbing his t-shirt from where he had shed it the night before and shrugging it on. “Between the cops, the far-right groups—”

“Which are really one and the same,” Enjolras said sourly.

“—and the regular fringe groups with an axe to grind, and just the fact that you make a pretty easy target—”

Enjolras scowled. “Are you victim-blaming?” he asked.

Grantaire rolled his eyes, heading into the kitchen to start the coffee. “No,” he said. “But that doesn’t also mean that you can’t take some reasonable precautions for your own safety.”

“I’ll keep that in mind, Mom,” Enjolras called, and Grantaire rolled his eyes again, grabbing two mugs from the cupboard as he waited for the coffeemaker. Enjolras padded into the kitchen a minute or two later, leaning against the fridge as he watched Grantaire. “You said that you couldn’t get to me in time.”

“Huh?” Grantaire said distractedly.

“In your dream. You apologized for not being able to get to me in time.”

Grantaire braced himself against the counter and shook his head. “Not just this dream,” he said quietly. “Every dream.”

Enjolras frowned. “So is that what this is really about?” he asked. 

“I don’t know,” Grantaire said tiredly. “Look, just...just drop it, ok?”

“Fine,” Enjolras said, though his tone indicated that it wasn’t. Grantaire could feel his eyes on him as he poured them both cups of coffee, and when he passed him the mug, Enjolras asked, “Are you ok?”

Grantaire shrugged, resting his hip against the counter as he took a swig of too-hot coffee. “I’m fine.”

Enjolras didn’t look convinced. “Well, look at this way,” he said bracingly, the teasing tone back in his voice, “even if you had gotten to me, what would you have been able to do to stop it? Going down in a hail of bullets together is only romantic when Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid do it.”

Grantaire stared at him, his heart in his throat. He knew that Enjolras was only joking, but somehow, that made it worse, that he would dismiss this as nothing more than a joke. “Maybe there’s nothing that I can do,” he said, his voice low, “but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t try.”

Without another word, he went out onto the balcony, closing the sliding door after him with more force than was necessary.

This time, Enjolras didn’t follow him right away, which was probably for the best. Grantaire knew he was being ridiculous, just as he knew that Enjolras had only been trying to make him laugh. It was an effort he would normally appreciate, if the image of Enjolras with a gun to his head wasn’t seared on the inside of his eyelids. 

A few minutes later, Enjolras poked his head out from the sliding door. “Can I come out?” he asked.

“Pretty sure you didn’t ask permission to do so back in junior high, so Lord knows I’m not going to stop you now.”

Enjolras laughed lightly, stepping out onto the balcony. “Cute,” he said. “And I’m sorry.”

“I know,” Grantaire said with a sigh, turning to rest his elbows on the balcony railing. 

Enjolras leaned on the railing next to him. “I didn’t mean—” he started, but despite his reaction earlier, Grantaire didn’t really need to hear it.

“I know,” he repeated instead, a little gentler this time, and Enjolras nodded.

“We’re ok, right?” he asked, studying Grantaire carefully.

Grantaire turned to raise an eyebrow at him. “You already asked me that.”

“No, I asked if you were ok,” Enjolras said. “Now I’m asking about us.”

Instead of answering, Grantaire snaked an arm around Enjolras’s waist, pulling him close and kissing him lightly.. “We’re—” he started, breaking off when there was a horrible sound of groaning metal. “Was that—?”

Before he could even finish the question, the railing they were both leaning against gave out with a horrible shriek, sending both men tumbling to the ground twenty feet below.

----------

Grantaire groaned, feeling like he had been hit by a semi-truck. “Enjolras?” he muttered, feeling with his hand since he wasn’t quite ready to open his eyes. “Enj—” 

His hand landed on something soft and he did finally open his eyes when he heard Enjolras groan, “You can stop molesting me at any time.”

“Oh thank God,” Grantaire said, realizing for the first time that despite the ache that seemed to permeate his body, nothing seemed broken or even bleeding. He carefully pushed against the ground to sit up, realizing for the first time that they weren’t lying on the sidewalk outside their apartment building. Instead, they were in some dark alley, lying on… “Cobblestones?” Grantaire asked, rubbing the back of his head as he looked around. “Where the hell are we?”

Enjolras sat up slowly, looking just as confused, though after a moment he froze, staring at Grantaire’s chest. “I think the better question is when are we,” he said, nodding towards Grantaire’s shirt.

Grantaire glanced down and let out a yelp. He was not dressed in the t-shirt and boxers he had previously had on. Instead, he was wearing a loose linen shirt with a green vest and matching cravat. He looked quickly at Enjolras, who was similarly dressed, though his vest was red. “What the fuck is going on?”

Enjolras braced himself against the wall as he stood, wincing the entire time. “If I had to guess,” he said, glancing around them, “we’re both hallucinating from our fall.”

Grantaire scowled and leaned forward, pinching Enjolras’s thigh. Enjolras let out a high-pitched noise and glared down at him. “What was that for?!”

“Proof we’re not dreaming,” Grantaire said. “Help me up, would you?”

Enjolras glowered at him but nonetheless helped him to his feet. “I didn’t say we were dreaming, I said we were hallucinating. There’s a difference.”

“Potato, po-tah-to.”

Grantaire winced as he brushed his pants off and Enjolras frowned. “Are you ok?”

“I’ve had hangovers worse than this, don’t worry,” Grantaire assured him, glancing around them as well. “So when do you think we are?”

“Judging by the clothes, sometime in the first half of the 19th century,” Enjolras said with a shrug.

“Care to narrow it down any?” Grantaire asked dryly. “Other than night time in what I’m guessing is Paris?” Enjolras ignored him, instead snagging a discarded pamphlet from where someone had tossed it. “What’s that?”

Enjolras shrugged, not looking up from the pamphlet. “Some kind of pamphlet,” he said vaguely.

Grantaire rolled his eyes. “Well no shit, I can see that. But a pamphlet for what?”

“For General Lamarque’s funeral.” Realization flashed across Enjolras’s face. “I know what date it is,” he said, his eyes wide. “It’s June 5th. Or early in the morning June 6th.”

Grantaire stared at him. “You got that from some random dude’s funeral?”

Enjolras gave him a look. “Sure, when the ‘random dude’s funeral was the major catalyst of the June Rebellion?”

“The June Rebellion?” Grantaire asked tiredly, certain he was in for a lecture on how those who don’t remember history were doomed to repeat it.

But Enjolras seemed willing to save the lecture for a different time. “Short rebellion that took place in Paris at the beginning of June, 1832. An unsuccessful uprising, obviously.” He squinted at the street name written on the edge of the building at the end of the alley. “And if I’m right, we should head in this direction so that we don’t get stuck in the crossfire.”

They set off slowly down the alley and turned right onto a deserted street. Grantaire glanced over at him before remarking, half-fond and half-exasperated, “You and your knowledge of every obscure uprising in western civilization’s long and sordid history…”

Enjolras laughed lightly. “Hey, I’m not the only one who remembers it,” he said. “I heard a rumor that someone was going to make a musical out of it.”

“Out of the June Rebellion?” Grantaire asked, incredulous. “Bit dark for a musical, don’t you think?”

Enjolras shrugged. “Well, after the success of Hamilton, I think we’re going to see a lot more musicals based on historical events,” he reasoned.

Grantaire arched an eyebrow. “Yeah, sure, but the June Rebellion? What are they gonna sing about, cholera? Deplorable working conditions? The prison-industrial complex in early 19th century France?”

“Don’t be an ass,” Enjolras said good-naturedly. “There’s a reason I’m a political organizer and not a musical writer—”

He broke off and Grantaire snorted. “Sure, including the fact that you can’t carry a tune in a bucket, but—”

Enjolras caught his arm. “Grantaire, shut up,” he ordered quietly. “Someone’s coming.”

Sure enough, out of nowhere, a figure popped up, holding a rifle aimed at them. “Identify yourselves as friend or foe of the Revolution,” the person called, and Enjolras and Grantaire exchanged startled glances.

Because it sounded like…

But it couldn’t be…

“Courfeyrac?” Enjolras managed as the figure approached. 

Sure enough, as the figure approached, they were able to make out his features, which matched Courfeyrac’s almost identically. Even stranger than that, when he saw them, the man who looked like Courfeyrac immediately relaxed. “Ah, Enjolras, Grantaire,” he said, lowering his rifle. “What are you doing this far from the barricade? When last I saw you, Enjolras, you were planning for tomorrow with Combeferre, and of course, Grantaire, you’ve been sleeping off the drink for hours now in the Corinthe.”

“And it was time that I got back to it,” Grantaire said quickly, glancing up at Enjolras. “Come find me when you can get away,” he said, his voice low, and for a moment, it looked like Enjolras would argue, probably to tell him that it was better that they stuck together.

But Grantaire suspected that it would be easier to figure what the hell was going on if they split up, or at least less obvious that both of them had no clue what was happening.

Enjolras hesitated but then nodded. “Be safe,” he said, leaning in automatically to kiss Grantaire’s forehead like he had hundreds of times before.

“I doubt that even in 1832 I’m the one who needs that reminder,” Grantaire said with a small smile, and he squeezed Enjolras’s hand before heading off to the building that Courfeyrac – or the man who looked exactly like him – had indicated.

Enjolras fell in step next to Courfeyrac, following him in what he could only assume was the direction of the barricade. But if this was Courfeyrac, he was unusually quiet for the man that Enjolras knew. Then, abruptly, Courfeyrac said, “I did not realize that you and Grantaire…”

He trailed off, but his meaning – and the reason for his unusual quiet – was clear. Enjolras realized that in this time, he and Grantaire must not be together. “It is...not something we’ve been, uh, public about,” Enjolras said carefully, watching Courfeyrac closely.

To his surprise, Courfeyrac laughed lightly. “Well, perhaps you’ve not been,” he said with a grin that was eerily familiar, “but there is none who could doubt the depth of Grantaire’s feelings for you.”

Enjolras was uncomfortably reminded of those first few years of barely managed friendship between him and Grantaire, when Grantaire had gone out of his way to get under Enjolras’s skin and how it had taken him forever to realize that it was because Grantaire liked him. “Apparently I’m not a quick study,” he muttered, and Courfeyrac laughed again, though he broke off quickly, growing more somber as they approached the barricade.

“Combeferre was just up there when last I saw him,” he said, pointing toward the barricade. “I must return to the watch lest we lose any others.”

The heaviness of his words hit Enjolras hard, and he wordlessly gripped his shoulder before letting him go. He wondered who they had lost, if it had been any of their friends who also existed in his own time.

It was a chilling thought.

He clambered up the back of the barricade to the small enclave Courfeyrac had pointed out and peered down, less surprised to see a tall man who looked just like the Combeferre from his own time.

But what he didn’t expect to see was that Combeferre was not alone.

And as both men turned to frown at him, he definitely did not expect to see that the man crouched next to Combeferre was...himself.

----------

“Uncanny,” Grantaire breathed, watching his own shoulders rise and fall lightly as he – the other he, the one clearly from this time, this universe, whatever it was – snored softly from where he was slumped over the table in the Corinthe.

The man had the same messy dark curls, the same bump in his nose from when he had broken it – though Grantaire doubted very strongly that this version had broken it falling off his skateboard in elementary school – even the same crooked fingers wrapped loosely around a green glass bottle.

It was like looking at a mirror image, and was one of the strangest things Grantaire had ever seen.

And he had once taken LSD with Bahorel.

The man shifted slightly in his sleep and Grantaire hesitated. He knew that he himself would hate being waken, but at the same time, there really wasn’t any other option.

So after another long moment, he leaned in and poked himself – the other himself – in the side. “Grantaire?” he half-whispered. “Grantaire, wake up.”

The man opened one eye. “Go ‘way,” he mumbled.

“Grantaire, wake up,” Grantaire said, louder this time, and it was enough to make the man open both his eyes.

“Enjolras?” the other Grantaire slurred before blinking and focusing on Grantaire. “Oh,” he said stupidly. “It’s you.”

----------

Enjolras stared dumbly down at the copy of himself, who frowned slightly. “Citizen,” the other Enjolras said. “Have you come to join our Cause?”

“In a manner of speaking,” Enjolras managed, wondering how in the hell he was going to possibly explain this.

Not that it mattered – at his words, the other Enjolras jumped down from the barricade, gun at the ready. “Then speak plainly,” he growled, grabbing Enjolras by the lapels with his free hand. “We have had our fill our spies and—”

He broke off when he finally saw Enjolras’s face, surprise followed by confusion crossing his own. Combeferre followed him down, his weapon also in hand, though he stopped in his tracks, his own eyes widening when he saw Enjolras. “What is this?” he asked, looked at the other Enjolras for explanation.

An explanation that either Enjolras was very clearly lacking.

To Enjolras’s surprise, the other Enjolras recovered first. “My cousin,” he said, a smoother lie than Enjolras would have managed. “From the country.”

“Right,” Enjolras said, nodding quickly. “His cousin, uh, Maximilien.” It was the first name that popped into his head and both Combeferre and the other Enjolras arched identical eyebrows. “I, uh, I was afeared that too late I might have been to attend to the barricade.”

He flushed when he realized he was talking like Yoda mixed with some kind of medieval knight, but thankfully, neither Combeferre nor the other Enjolras appeared to have noticed, or else were too caught up with confusion over what exactly was happening to care.

“Give us a moment,” the other Enjolras ordered quietly, and Combeferre hesitated.

“Are you certain?” he asked, eyeing Enjolras warily.

The other Enjolras nodded. “This man is no traitor or spy,” he said. “On that, I would stake my life.”

Combeferre hesitated for a moment longer before bowing his head and nodding. “Be quick,” he told the other Enjolras. “We have much to discuss before dawn.”

The other Enjolras nodded again and Combeferre left, though not until after one last furtive glance at Enjolras. The other Enjolras finally released Enjolras and set his gun down, crossing his arms in front of his chest. “Who are you and why do you bear my face?” he asked bluntly.

Enjolras licked his lips before asking, a little desperately, “Would you believe me if I told you that I was you from the future?”

The other Enjolras considered him for a long moment, his brow drawn and his expression impassive. Then he shook his head. “No,” he said. “I would not.”

----------

“So I am you,” the other Grantaire said slowly. “Or, more accurately perhaps, you are me.”

Grantaire nodded. “Right.”

The other Grantaire shook his head slowly. “I would believe that I had drunk too much absinthe,” he said, squinting at Grantaire, “save that I know not why my drink-addled brain would supply this particular vision.”

He raised the bottle in his hand to his lips, letting out a small noise of disappointment when he realized it was empty. “Just like that?” Grantaire asked skeptically. “You believe me without any explanation?”

“What other explanation is there?” the other Grantaire grumbled, tossing the empty bottle aside. “When you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.”

Grantaire gaped at him. “And now you’re somehow quoting Star Trek?” he spluttered.

The other Grantaire leaned back in his chair. “I do not know what trek through the stars you reference,” he said, scratching his chest and yawning, “but do you suppose the stars you see in your time are the same as in mine?”

Grantaire resisted the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose and made a mental note to rein in the philosophizing the next time he, Joly and Bossuet got drunk. How neither of them had hauled off and decked him yet… “I guess so,” he said with a sigh.

“In your time, is there also…” Grantaire braced himself for what many questions the other Grantaire inevitably had for him, but to his surprise, all the other Grantaire asked was, “Is there an Enjolras?”

“Oh, yes.” 

Grantaire didn’t hesitate in his answer, but something in the two words had the other Grantaire leaning forward again, his expression unreadable. “And you and he are friends?”

The other Grantaire sounded slightly surprised, but Grantaire just shrugged, a little helplessly. “Friends, lovers, partners...Enjolras is my everything.”

He knew he sounded like a lovesick idiot, but he learned long ago not to bother trying to hide it. The other Grantaire looked even more surprised by this. “Lovers,” he repeated, shaking his head slowly, before peering at Grantaire closely. “But you are not his everything.”

Grantaire blinked, surprised (though he supposed he probably shouldn’t be) by how perspective the other Grantaire was, even three sheets to the wind. “No,” he said. “But he and I understand that. He has the Cause, and everything that comes with it, and he would not be the Enjolras that I fell in love with without it.”

The other Grantaire shook his head again, something like awe creeping into his tone and across his expression. “So you have found a way to be together in spite of – or perhaps because of – who he is.”

The other Grantaire didn’t word it as a question, but Grantaire nodded nonetheless. “Yes,” he said. “It took a lot of work – I mean, it still does – but we have found a way to work it out and be together.” He paused, his heart sinking just slightly at the look on the other Grantaire’s face. “I’ll take it you and your Enjolras…”

“He despises me.”

The other Grantaire said it so plainly that Grantaire flinched at the starkness of the words. “I’m sure he doesn’t.”

But the other Grantaire didn’t appear to have heard him. “Maybe it’s enough,” he murmured. “Enough to know that in another lifetime, we found a way…”

He trailed off again and looked up at Grantaire. “Do we die here?”

The abruptness of the question took Grantaire aback. He didn’t know if he was referring to we as in him and the other Grantaire, or the other Grantaire and his Enjolras, but it didn’t really matter since he didn’t know the answer either way. “I don’t know,” he said honestly. 

The other Grantaire nodded heavily. Then, abruptly, he muttered, “If Enjolras’s time is come, let us hope mine is as well. There is no life worth living without him in it.”

Grantaire worried his lower lip between his teeth. As much as he wanted to tell the other Grantaire that he was wrong, hadn’t he had a similar thought just that morning? “I don’t think your Enjolras would be pleased to hear you say that,” he said instead.

To his surprise, the other Grantaire managed a ghost of a smile. “Nor yours, I’d imagine,” he agreed before looking at Grantaire plainly. “But you understand, do you not?”

The breath seemed to catch in Grantaire’s throat, and he nodded. “Yes,” he said quietly. “Yes, I understand.”

For one long moment, the other Grantaire studied him closely before his shoulders slumped and he sighed heavily. “Well, it has been strange and yet surprisingly pleasant to meet such an apparition as yourself,” he said, already leaning forward to again rest his head against the wood of the table. “Now you should leave me to my slumber.”

Grantaire stood, before hesitating. “Will you promise me something before I go?”

The other Grantaire cracked one eye open. “What would you ask of me?”

“If the worst that both you and I fear comes to pass, if you are to lose Enjolras on this barricade, will you go to him in the end, and die with him?”

He honestly didn’t know what made him ask it, other than the lingering memory of his dream from what seemed like so long ago and yet like no time had passed either. That and what the other Grantaire had said, lingering just the same: Maybe it’s enough to know that in another lifetime...

“I do not think he would want me there,” the other Grantaire said, lifting his head off the table.

Grantaire shook his head. “I think you might be surprised.”

A small, sad smile lifted the corners of the other Grantaire’s mouth. “Forgive me, but your Enjolras seems much gentler than mine. And while he might want you by his side when the end comes, I do not know if I can believe the same for my own.”

“Then don’t do it for him,” Grantaire said bluntly. :Go to him for yourself. Because you deserve to know that he dies knowing that you loved him enough to die by his side”.

“Perhaps I will,” the other Grantaire murmured, closing his eyes again. “But only with his permission. I owe him that much, after all the ways I have failed him.”

Grantaire opened his mouth to argue more, but closed it again when he heard a soft snore coming from the other Grantaire, and he shook his head again. “Good luck,” he whispered before turning to leave the other Grantaire to sleep off the alcohol.

He had no idea if the other Grantaire would even remember the conversation when he woke up.

But he hoped he would.

And regardless, he knew he would never forget it.

----------

He had barely taken two steps from the Corinthe when he almost ran smack into Enjolras. “Enjolras,” he gasped, before hesitating. “It is you, isn’t it? Not, uh, some other Enjolras?”

“Considering it’ll be well over a century before cloning is invented…” Enjolras said with a tired smile, and Grantaire sighed in relief. “I’ll take it you also met your doppelgänger?”

“If that’s what you want to call him,” Grantaire muttered.

Enjolras raised an eyebrow. “What would you call him?”

Grantaire considered the question for a minute. “Weird as fuck,” he said finally.

Enjolras laughed before glancing over his shoulder, his smile fading. “C’mon,” he said, taking Grantaire’s hand. “We need to get out of here. The National Guard will be attacking soon.” 

They walked together in silence for a good distance until Enjolras judged them relatively safe. “Here,” he said, shouldering a door open. “We should be safe in here.”

“You can’t just break into someone’s house!” Grantaire hissed, even as he followed Enjolras inside.

“I’m not,” Enjolras told him. “Didn’t you see the sign outside? This building is abandoned. Now c’mon, if we can get up to the roof, we should have a pretty good view.”

Together, they headed up the stairs; from there it was a quick scramble up to the roof, Enjolras pulling Grantaire up after him, and they sat down together. “So, what, we’re just going to watch ourselves get killed?” Grantaire asked.

Enjolras sighed. “Believe me, if I could think of an alternative…”

He trailed off and Grantaire sighed, resting his head against Enjolras’s shoulder. “It was weird, wasn’t it?” he asked softly. “Meeting different versions of ourselves. Seeing what we could have been like.”

Enjolras nodded. “Yeah,” he said. “My other self didn’t believe me, at least not at first.”

Grantaire laughed lightly. “Strangely enough, the other Grantaire believed it immediately.” He nudged Enjolras gently. “Who’d’ve thought that I’d be the believer and you’d be the cynic.”

Enjolras half- smiled. “Certainly not me,” he agreed. “Speaking of, what did you and the other Grantaire talk about?”

Grantaire’s smile faded. “Not much,” he said. “A little bit about what’s going to happen. A little bit about what he should do if it does happen.”

He didn’t specify what the ‘it’ was that he was referring to, but Enjolras seemed to understand, since he nodded slowly. “And what did you tell him?”

“That even if there is nothing that he can do to stop it, being with you in the end is enough.”

“Grantaire…” 

Enjolras’s voice was pained, but Grantaire just shook his head. “Don’t,” he said.

“But there is so much in your life worth living for—” Enjolras started, his voice heated.

“Of course there is,” Grantaire said easily. “A million things to live for. But the only thing in my life worth dying for is you.”

Enjolras ducked his head but didn’t try to argue further. After a long moment, he turned to kiss the top of Grantaire’s head. “Thank you,” he murmured.

Grantaire tilted his head back to kiss Enjolras properly before asking, “What about the other Enjolras? Did you tell him that he would, y’know, fail?”

Enjolras squinted toward the horizon and the sun that was slowly starting to break over the buildings. “No.”

Grantaire lifted his head off of Enjolras’s shoulder so that he could look at him. “So you lied to him?”

“No,” Enjolras repeated. “I told him the truth. Just...not all of it.” He sighed, glancing back over at Grantaire. “I told him that no matter what happens on the barricade, he will have done his part in changing the world.”

Grantaire nodded slowly. “I’m not sure I would call that the truth.”

Enjolras gave him a ghost of his usual smile. “Yeah, well, as already discussed, you always were a cynic.”

“In all other lives besides this one, anyway,” Grantaire said, setting his head back on Enjolras’s shoulder. “So now what?”

Enjolras sighed, wrapping an arm around Grantaire’s shoulders. “Now we wait, I guess.”

It was over almost as quickly as it began, and even though they were shielded from witnessing the worst of it, Grantaire still shuddered at every cannon blast or gunshot they could hear. When it finally died down, Grantaire glanced up at Enjolras. “Is it finished?” he asked, his voice hoarse.

Enjolras just shook his head, his brow furrowed. “I’m not sure.”

Suddenly, there was one final barrage of gunshots that sounded through the stillness of the early morning, and then…

They woke up.

----------

It somehow hurt even worse than before, though Grantaire wasn’t sure that was physically possible. “Ow,” he croaked as a bunch of EMTs loaded him onto a stretcher.

“He’s awake!” one of them called before leaning down to tell him, “Sir, there’s been an accident. Your balcony collapsed. We’re taking you and your friend to the hospital.”

“Don’t—” Grantaire started, though his voice was muffled by some kind of mask over his mouth.

The EMT shook her head. “Don’t try to talk,” she told him. 

But Grantaire reached up with a shaking hand to pull the mask off just enough to tell her, “Just...keep us together.”

She replaced the mask and squeezed his hand. “I promise,” she told him. 

Grantaire nodded, his eyes fluttering closed as he passed out again.

----------

When he woke up the next time, Grantaire was in a hospital room, feeling a lot less like he’d been hit by a semi-truck. A quick glance at his hand told him it was likely whatever was in his IV that was doing the heavy lifting. “Oh good,” a familiar voice said, and Grantaire turned his head to see Enjolras in the hospital bed next to him. “You’re finally awake.”

Grantaire smiled slightly at him. “Mmm,” he agreed. “And they gave us the good stuff.”

“Don’t get used to it,” Enjolras warned, wincing slightly as he readjusted to lie on his side so that he could see him. “You broke your arm and fractured your ankle, in case you were wondering.”

“Oh, is that what those casts are for?” Grantaire asked.

Enjolras’s eyes narrowed. “How can you possibly manage to be sarcastic while on morphine?”

Grantaire shrugged, wincing as he did. “Experience,” he said dryly. “What about you?”

His eyes flickered over Enjolras’s body, but he didn’t see any obvious injuries besides some bruises and scrapes. “Cracked a few ribs,” Enjolras said. “You apparently broke my fall.”

“Figures,” Grantaire muttered. “Well, at least you’ve had broken ribs before.”

Enjolras snorted. “Yeah, I think there’s a punch card I can get. Ten broken ribs and the eleventh one they’ll set for free.”

Grantaire laughed, though he stopped when it made his own ribs ache. Enjolras half-smiled. “Thanks for catching me, though.”

“Anytime,” Grantaire said with a wink that too quickly turned into a wince.

Something shifted in Enjolras’s expression, and he hesitated before asking cautiously, “Did you, um, did you have a dream while you were...out?”

Grantaire blinked, sluggish memories slowly coming back to him, images from a dream he couldn’t quite remember, like they were just out of reach. “Yeah,” he said slowly. “Yeah, I did. Something about…” He thought about it for a long moment before snorting a laugh. “Something about the June Rebellion, of all asinine things. Clearly I’ve been spending too much time with you.” He looked over at Enjolras, tracing his features with his eyes. “You were there, I think.”

Enjolras managed a smile. “You were in my dream, too.” He paused before asking, “Was yours a happy dream?”

Grantaire shrugged and winced. “We were together,” he said simply. “That’s enough to make any dream happy.”

“Good,” Enjolras said. “I just...I didn’t want you to have another nightmare.”

Grantaire shook his head slowly. “I think…” He frowned slightly. “Don’t ask me how, but I think I’m done with those dreams now. Like something happened in my dream that made it….I dunno, ok somehow.”

“Yeah?” Enjolras asked, watching him closely.

“Or maybe I’m just high as balls on morphine.”

Enjolras laughed. “Yeah, that’s probably more like it,” he said. “You should get some rest.”

“So should you,” Grantaire said with a yawn. “Besides, there’s something I gotta do first.” He stretched his hand out from his hospital bed toward Enjolras.

“What are you doing?” Enjolras asked.

“Trying to hold your hand, you dolt,” Grantaire said sleepily. “Since I can’t hold all of you right now.” Enjolras hesitated and Grantaire rolled his eyes. “Do you permit it?” he asked sarcastically.

Enjolras scowled but nonetheless took his hand, lacing their fingers together, and they stayed that way until both of them fell asleep again.

Together.

[everybodyscupoftea]

you are the music in me

rafe x reader

five times rafe shows you a song, and one time you show him

holy cow who let me do this:

okay huge thanks to @travisgermy​ who stayed up forever with me picking out songs one night, the list of “maybe this” or “idk does this fit the vibe” is insanely long but i think i got it right.

i’m very very proud of my playlists and my taste in music. music is also very important to me, so i decided to write this because if a man ever came to me and said “this song made me think of you,” i might marry him on the spot

finally, thanks to my two very good friends for encouraging me and reading it over @sunnypogue​ and @moldisgoodforyou​ you guys are the best

little warning: there’s some cursing

(also i tried to link the songs to the titles so you can click and listen while reading that part)

You met Rafe freshman year in an auditorium size Intro to Theater elective. He was giving off huge ‘don’t fuck with me’ vibes and sitting alone in the top left corner of the room, pretty far away from everyone else. Not only was the lack of people appealing, but the rumpled boy with headphones in, chugging coffee, was cute.

Orientation was scheduled late for you, and theater was the elective you opted to take when all the music classes were filled. Unfortunately, scheduling last meant most of the seats were full anyway, and you had no choice but take it at 8 a.m.

It was easy at first, barely any work involved and minimal notes. You basically just had to show up and fill a seat for attendance. And then the ‘acting’ unit started and your professor, who had been your favorite until then, threw a partner project and suddenly the ‘not talk to anyone’ strategy you’d been employing backfired.

Holding in a groan, you looked over the lines of dialogue he’d given out with the instructions, “Make it your own.” People all around you were moving and chatting with the people they’d talked to in class already and you felt frozen. Until headphone boy suddenly sat down next to you.

“Wanna partner up?” he asked after a long sip of coffee.

“Oh, um, yeah, that’d be great.”

Thus, the shaky alliance formed. He was a little closed off at first, but you managed to get to know him a little more, and by the end of the semester, you’d even call the two of you friends. It was really solidified when he texted you first a few times over winter break.

Rafe was really easy to talk to, he had his own amount of trauma that he didn’t really talk much about unless it related to an issue you were going through and he felt his experience could relate to yours and comfort you. It was really nice, having a support system away from home in this new college town where you didn’t know anyone.

Study sessions together turned to lunches together turned to dinners together. He became your permanent bar buddy and you always felt safe with his steady presence nearby. You’d never really known anyone quite like him and it was exhilarating being with him all the time.

Where Rafe really excelled was music. He constantly had headphones in when walking around campus, when the two of you studied, and when you went to the gym together. It didn’t bother you, it wasn’t rude, he just liked it and he knew so much about artists and bands you’d never heard of. It was how he best communicated.

One: Let Me Down Slowly

Fall of sophomore year, you started seeing a guy in your literature class. It wasn’t like a super romantic thing, it started with just sleeping together after a football game to occasional dinners when you weren’t with Rafe.

His name was Brian and Rafe hated him. Casual sex was hard for you, separating feelings and intimacy wasn’t your style, but for Brian you tried really hard. It failed, just like Rafe warned you it would, but you vowed to keep faking it anyway.

Eventually, Brian, during dinner, asked if you had been seeing anyone else. You hadn’t, of course, and told him so. He seemed pleased and you thought that meant he wasn’t either. Where you went wrong was not actually getting clarification on that point.

He invited you to a party one Friday night, and you decided to go. Rafe was in your dorm room, watching you get dressed, as you chattered on about finally being official with Brian and this being the two of you’s big moment as a couple finally.

Rafe sat cross-legged on your bed, barely concealing his contempt toward Brian, but you ignored it, pushing through. Once you deemed yourself ready, you turned to Rafe, holding out your necklace to him, “Can you help me put this on?”

He sighed and hopped off your bed. Taking the necklace from your hand, he gently turned you around and stepped closer, brushing all your hair to one side. The metal was cold when it hit your collarbone and you shivered a little.

Rafe’s fingers danced over your neck as he fastened the chain and fixed your hair back. Putting both hands on your shoulders, he squeezed a little and smiled at you in the mirror, “Knock ‘em dead, gorgeous.”

Before you could respond, Brian texted you that he was parked outside, waiting for you. With a nervous exhale, you held your fist out for Rafe to bump, “Thanks for keeping me company, Cameron.”

He smiled and gently bumped your knuckles, “Anytime, bud.” You didn’t see his smile slip a little as you left the room.

Brian was blasting some club remix he frequently listened to when you got into this car. He smiled at you, leaning in for a kiss, “Ready, babe?”

“Ready,” you told him, buckling in.

The party wasn’t anything new or special, you’d been to many just like it, but it felt different. You weren’t sure what it was, maybe that you were finally officially on Brian’s arm, but the air felt odd.

Excusing yourself to go to the bathroom, you pulled out your phone to check and see if Rafe had texted you. He had, something short reassuring you that if you needed a ride home later, he’d be up. You breathed out a sigh of relief because Brian had started drinking the moment the two of you stepped in the door and you weren’t sure how he planned on getting you home.

Leaning forward and bracing yourself on the counter, you stared at yourself in the mirror. With an annoyed sigh, you hissed, “Get it together, bitch. This is supposed to be your night.”

And with that, you left the bathroom. Only to find Brian making out with some girl you’d never seen before on the couch. Which really fucking hurt. You didn’t even really know what to do, you’d only been dating for a few weeks, but you’d been emotionally connected to him for much longer.

Tears you didn’t want rose in your eyes as you stared frozen at the two of them groping each other. One of Brian’s friends that you’d met a few times caught your eye. His widened and he shook Brian’s shoulder. Brian, hazy eyed, pulled away and saw you standing there, clearly hurt.

He jumped up, fear in his eyes, and you backed away, shaking your head. You weren’t sure if he chased you, you hightailed it out of the house and down the street, wanting nothing more than to get out of there. Pity was the last thing you wanted from him or his asshole friends who did nothing to stop him.

By the time you’d gotten far enough away that you didn’t hear the music anymore, the cold had set in and you were shivering. Wrapping your arms around yourself, you sniffled several times, trying to get it together. Unfortunately, your tears refused to listen and streamed down your cheeks, not slowing in the slightest.

Suddenly, your phone vibrated, a text from Rafe telling you he’d made it to season four of the show you recommended him and that season three’s finale had been heartbreaking.

How could you not give me even a little heads up, what the fuck

You choked out a laugh through the tears and hit call before thinking about how he’d definitely be able to tell something was up from your voice.

“Hey,” he answered, sounding a little concerned, “you still at the party?”

“Um, not really,” you said, trying to not give away your crying.

It didn’t work, you heard rustling in the background as he asked, “Where are you? Better yet, where’s Brian?”

You sighed, “Probably fucking whatever chick I caught him making out with.”

Rafe cursed lowly before saying, “Send me your location and I’ll come pick you up.”

Hanging up, you sent it to him and sat down on the sidewalk, pulling your knees to your chest. You kind of didn’t want to see Rafe because you didn’t really want the ‘I told you so’ likely to come as soon as you got in the car.

He pulled up, not too long after your tears stopped, and you hopped up to get into the passenger side. You weren’t expecting him to throw it in park and jog around to wrap you into a tight hug before you could get in. It took you by surprise, but it wasn’t unwelcome. After getting over your shock, you squeezed him back tightly, cherishing the unusual show of affection.

It brought the tears back and you sniffled a few times, burying your face into his chest. Rafe held you tightly until you got ahold of yourself again and then pulled the door open to help you into his truck. While it wasn’t unusual for him to do, you couldn’t help but notice for the first time, that it was something Brian never did.

Before you could buckle up, he grabbed one of his sweatshirts off the backseat and handed it to you.

“How are you feeling right now, bud? Do you want to wallow for a bit or do you want to say ‘fuck him’ and move on?”

You sighed, “I don’t know, kinda in the mood to wallow right now.”

Rafe cranked up the heat and nodded before pulling up his Spotify to pick something out. A familiar sounding song started playing and he looked over at you, “This song really encompasses the lonely feeling of wanting someone, great for wallowing.”

You sniffled a few times and turned the volume up before sinking back into the seat. He smiled at you gently and started driving down the street. The words started up and you couldn’t stop the tears anymore.

Don’t cut me down, throw me out, leave me here to waste

Rafe tapped his thumb against the steering wheel to the song as he drove. You quickly recognized his route to the coffee shop the two of you go to. Wiping your nose on the hoodie sleeve, you finally spoke up, “It’s closed.”

“Huh?” he asked, glancing over at you quickly before focusing on the road again.

“Coco Bean, it’s closed.”

“I’m just driving, no destination.”

“Oh,” you said, tuning into the song again.

Could you find a way to let me down slowly / a little sympathy, I hope you can show me / if you wanna go then I’ll be so lonely / if you’re leaving baby let me down slowly

With a long, shuddering sigh, you melted back into the seat and let Rafe drive. You were a little startled when he started to sing softly. He’d hummed in front of you but never sang, and he actually had a pretty good voice.

And I can’t stop myself from falling down

Twisting your fingers through the hem of the sweatshirt, you tilted your head to lean against the cold window as the song started its last bit.

Now I’m slipping through the cracks of your cold embrace / so please, please / could you find a way to let me down slowly

Rafe switched to something slightly more upbeat as you tried to pull yourself together. The two of you drove around for hours, songs switching from upbeat to sad, enough to keep you interested.

“One last song,” he told you, around 3 a.m. and All I Want started up. Rafe had showed you that one before. He reached over and grabbed your hand, squeezing tightly for a few seconds before adding, “Brian’s a dick and you deserve better.”

You squeezed back and nodded, not really knowing what to say.

Two: I’m Good

You’d stubbornly avoided Rate My Professor when trying to schedule a bio class, which was turning out to be a pretty hefty mistake. The guy you picked, mostly because of the 10 a.m. time slot, was a disaster. His teaching style didn’t match your learning style and he barely taught the information he used on the test anyway.

Needless to say, you bombed the first one. Like not a dramatic, ‘I bombed it’ and it turning out to be a C. Like a serious 40%. You weren’t sure how you made it through the rest of your classes, maybe adrenaline or just the pure stubbornness to not have a very public breakdown, but you sent Rafe a very vague text blowing off lunch and went straight to your room.

Face planting onto your bed, you shut your phone off, totally content to not talk to anyone for at least another day. Hours could’ve passed before you finally rolled onto your side, you weren’t sure what time in was, all you knew was that your stomach was growling.

At some point during your wallowing, you roommate had come home, and it had gotten dark outside. All of your weekend plans flew straight out the window and the idea of doing any work when clearly it would be pointless anyway was nauseating.

Eventually, you fell into a restless sleep, dreaming about failing classes and angry bio teachers trying to break your fingers until you finally understood cellular respiration. It was easily one of the worst nights you’d ever had, and by the time the sun rose, you were ready to just stop thinking.

You knew your roommate would eventually come into your room to ask about getting brunch, or to just see what you had planned for the day, but you really didn’t want to see her. What you didn’t expect when your door was finally pushed open, was to see Rafe standing there, holding a bag of food.

“Hey, bud,” he spoke softly, walking slowly toward your bed, “you okay?”

“Do I look okay?” you asked, voice cracking.

Rafe laughed, “No, you don’t. But I did bring your favorite.”

You perked up a little, looking at the bag curiously, “Chicken caesar wrap?”

“Yes ma’am. Would you like to join me on a walk?”

You sighed, but getting out of the room with Rafe sounded kind of good, so you stood and put on a pair of slides, not wanting to put in the effort of actual shoes. He wrapped an arm around your shoulders while the two of you walked down the hallway, and you cherished the closeness.

“What happened?” he finally asked, as the two of you made it out the building and over to a bench outside.

“I failed my test. I don’t know what happened, none of the material he taught was on the test and I just don’t know how to study for that.”

Rafe handed you half of the wrap and let you rest your head on his shoulder before speaking, “Did you check Quizlet, maybe someone who’s already taken it posted something for you to use.”

You shrugged while taking a bite, “Maybe. I mean I know I can come back from this, he drops the lowest test, but I don’t know, I’ve never gotten a grade that bad. It’s so discouraging and I just lost all motivation to do anything.”

He hummed softly and pulled his phone out. After scrolling for a few seconds, he offered you a headphone with a smile, “Maybe this will help.”

Trying to figure out who I am / or who I’m supposed to be / feel good about where I stand / so I can make the most of me

You drummed your fingers on Rafe’s knee to the uplifting beat. He bumped your shoulders together and started eating the other half of the wrap.

You only live once / I’m good with myself / I’m there for my friends / til the very end

Rafe reached out to lace his fingers through yours, catching your attention, before saying, “You know I’ve always got you right?”

You nodded, tears rising for the first time since the numbness gripped you, “Yeah, Cameron, I know.”

I’m good, I’m good, I’m good, I’m good / living life just like I should / wouldn’t change it if I could / I’m good, I’m good, I’m good

When the song ended, you lifted your head up and finished your half of the wrap. Rafe paused the next song playing and smiled down at you gently, “You are the smartest person I’ve ever met, if anyone can beat this asshole bio professor, it’s you.”

“I am pretty smart, huh?”

He didn’t answer, just laughed and leaned down to kiss you on the forehead. You didn’t know what you could do without him.

Three: Blood // Water

It got out of hand before you could stop it. You were tired all the time because of work and your roommate was stressed from school, and her new boyfriend was a huge slob. He used your utilities and ate your food and didn’t pay a lick of rent.

You’d been fuming about it for months, but it really came to head when you realized how often he was staying over and she wasn’t giving you a heads up. One afternoon, you were watching TV on the couch, a rare free afternoon that you wanted to spend in your underwear, no one was home anyway. So you thought.

Your roommate had class, but she’d let her boyfriend in and he’d been sitting in her room without you knowing. Just as you settled in, her door flew open and you shrieked, grabbing for the nearest blanket to cover yourself up with. He stared at you, mouth hanging open.

“Dude, stop fucking looking, what the fuck?!” you yelled, and he slapped a hand over his eyes. Taking the opportunity, you ran to your room and slammed the door shut. He had to go, the boyfriend either needed to stop living rent free or stay out of your personal space.

By the time your roommate made it home, you’d had time to get yourself really really worked up, and you were ready for a fucking fight. Rafe had called at some point and tried to calm you down, but talking it out with him only made you angrier, and he eventually gave up, telling you to not let her walk all over you.

She walked in and toward her room, but you stopped her right outside it by clearing your throat. Maybe, for a more constructive conversation, you could’ve started it better, but you went straight in with, “So do I need to buy Marcus a housewarming gift or is he going to live somewhere else anytime soon?”

She frowned at you, “What?”

“I’m not paying 50% of the rent if your boyfriend is gonna be here as much as I am. I’ll gladly play a third of the rent, but I’m gonna need him to contribute if he’s going to use my hot water and eat my food.”

Your roommate took a defensive stance, “He’s not here that much.”

“Oh yeah? Well then why did I go to wash my work uniform, only to find his shit in the washing machine?”

“That was a one-time thing, he stayed over a few nights and ran out of clothes.”

Fists tightening, you drew yourself up, “Okay, tell me, when’s the last time he went home?”

She paused to think and you nodded, emphasizing your point. Before either of you could say anything else, there was a knock at your door. Your roommate opened it and saw Rafe standing outside. With a huff, she turned back to you, “Well while we’re at it, talking about boys being over all the time, what about Rafe?”

Your jaw dropped, “Rafe isn’t eating your food and showering at 3 a.m. and WALKING OUT WHILE YOU’RE SITTING IN YOUR UNDERWEAR.”

Rafe’s eyes widened, he’d never heard you yell like that before, it was rattling. Your roommate had, but never at her, and she looked taken aback before narrowing her eyes, “Why the fuck were you just sitting in your underwear?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, am I not allowed to do that in the comfort of my own home?”

“Not when Marcus is around.”

You threw your hands up, “That’s the fucking point! I never know when he’s around or isn’t because you don’t have the courtesy to give me the heads up!”

She stepped closer to you as if to shove you, but Rafe stepped between the two of you, putting both of his hands on your shoulders, “Hey, bud, hey, look at me, okay?”

You fought against him, trying to get another look at your roommate, “Never compare that asshole to Rafe, at least Rafe can hold a fucking conversation. You’re dating a piece of wet cardboard.”

“Babe,” Rafe warned you.

“Babe,” she mimicked in a high-pitched voice, “you do everything he tells you to, doormat?”

Rafe’s hands tensed on your shoulders and he narrowed his eyes, “Marcus, better get your ass out here and help me. You’re the root of the whole fucking problem.”

Her bedroom door opened slowly and a very sheepish looking Marcus stood there with a pair of her shoes in hand, “Let’s go for a drive, huh?”

Rafe kept you in place until the other two had left and you sagged into his hold. You couldn’t stop the tears that started falling as soon as the door slammed shut, and Rafe pulled you into a hug. He stroked your hair, “You’re just tired, babe, it’s going to be okay.”

You sniffled pathetically, “Why won’t she just be fucking accommodating.”

He pulled you behind him to your room and shut the door behind you. It was nighttime, and the room went dark immediately, until Rafe turned on the fairy lights you had hanging around your bed. He sat down and patted the empty spot next to him, “You remember when you called me to come hang these damn lights up?”

You couldn’t help the laugh that escaped, “Yeah, you hated me for it.”

“I didn’t hate you, but I wasn’t thrilled.”

Leaning into his side, you sighed, “Did I just fuck things up?”

Rafe wrapped his arms around you and laid down, arranging the two of you on the bed so that you were partially on top of him before he spoke, “I don’t think so. Y’all have been friends for so long, I’m sure she’ll come around.”

You played with his shirtsleeve for a few seconds before looking up at his face. He was already looking down at you, soft smile on his lips, and you stuck your tongue out playfully at him. Rafe laughed and lifted his hips up to fish his phone out of his pocket.

“Oh, you got a song for me?” you asked, leaning further onto him.

“Maybe. You want some angry vibes?”

“Hmmm, I think so, yeah.”

He picked a song after a few seconds and laid back fully, shutting his eyes while you started to hum along. It was catchy.

Look me in my eyes / tell me everything’s not fine / or the people ain’t happy / and the river has run dry

Rafe smiled with his eyes closed as you climbed off the bed to start jumping around. All your angry energy started to drain as you read from the lyrics on your phone.

The price of your greed / is your son and your daughter / what you gon’ do / when there’s blood in the water

You grabbed his arm, trying to pull him up to jump around with you, but you weren’t nearly strong enough. Rafe laughed at you, eyes finally open again, until you huffed and tossed his arm back. He stayed down watching you as the song built.

I am the people / I am the storm / I am the riot / I am the swarm / when the last’s tree’s fallen / the animal can’t hide / money won’t solve it / what’s your alibi

It was probably for the best your roommate had left because if she was still there, she’d be furious with your screaming. By the time the song ended, you were breathing heavily and Rafe was laughing. Collapsing on top of him, you tried to catch your breath.

Rafe brushed an errant strand of hair out of your face, “That was beautiful, sweetheart.”

You rolled your eyes but smiled, “Felt good, thanks for the assist, Cameron.”

The smile slowly fell from his lips as he kept staring at you, and you were confused. Before you could ask what was wrong, he shut his eyes and leaned up to kiss you.

It wasn’t totally unexpected. You’d thought about it a few times, and you were pretty sure he had too, but he’d never said anything, so you figured it was out of the question. So, while you weren’t prepared, you were happily surprised.

After a few seconds to work through the shock, you started kissing him back. He kept it short, you figured he would with emotions running as high as they were in you.

“Anytime,” he told you, brushing your lips with his thumb.

Four: Let You Down

Your boss informed you that there was nothing that could be done. That the department was going through budget cuts and they’d be laying people off. Unfortunately, since you were the youngest, you were the first to go.

The early shift was your normal gig, you always woke up around 5 a.m. to get ready and get coffee, and that morning, you woke up to a missed call and a message from your boss. Rafe was still sleeping, so you unplugged your phone and took it with you to the kitchen to listen to the message while you made coffee.

After turning the kettle on, you brought the phone to your ear, and immediately regretted it. You missed the first part of the message, but got the gist from, “So sorry to have to let you go, with the cuts in our department, we have to make hard decisions- “

And you didn’t really care to hear the rest. Three years of your life wasted on that place that promised you a job post-grad, and then just cut the rope. Your hands were shaking and you shut the kettle off, deciding to just go back to bed and cuddle with Rafe until his alarm went off.

Unfortunately, Rafe was a light sleeper and woke up when you tried to get back into your spot next to him.

“Babe, wha?” he mumbled, rubbing his eyes.

“Nothing,” you whispered, “go back to sleep.”

Rafe squinted at you, “Don’t you have work?”

You sighed, “Not anymore, I got let go.”

He sat up and you groaned, not really wanting to hash it out with him at 5:30 in the morning. Fumbling to switch the lamp on, Rafe pulled you into a hug with his other arm and you couldn’t stop yourself from sinking into his arms.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart, I know you liked that job.”

“They told me like two fucking weeks ago they were looking at a managerial position for me. I just, I don’t know why I was on the first list of cuts.”

Rafe huffed out a laugh, “I wish I could tell you, but unfortunately, I can’t get into the mindset of actual buffoons.”

Your lips quirked up, “They are buffoons, aren’t they?”

The two of you sat in the middle of the bed for who knows how long, just hanging onto each other, and you were almost back asleep when Rafe moved again, this time to stand up. You glared at him, “Can’t we sleep?”

“We can nap later, but I want to see the sunrise.”

He grabbed his keys from the desk by the door and you followed him out to the kitchen. There was a place the two of you had gone before, near the reservoir, for sunsets, but you’d never done a sunrise before. You started the coffee making process again and pulled on one of his sweatshirts while he leaned against the wall, looking up what time the sun rose.

“It says 6:40 so we have plenty of time to get there.”

“Car sex,” you offered jokingly.

“Make the coffee, babe,” he dismissed, pulling you in to ruffle your hair.

You shoved him away, pouting, “I can’t make the coffee when you’re manhandling me.”

He didn’t let you push him far, grabbing onto your hand where it was pushing his chest and pulled you back to him. The smell of coffee filled the kitchen as he hugged you. Your face was buried in his chest and the two of you just breathed together until he pulled back enough to catch your lips with his.

You pushed up on your toes, leaning further into him. He loosened his grip on your hands and you slid them up to cup his jaw. It was quiet in the kitchen, the only sound coming from the coffee maker and the slight hum of the air conditioner. You basked in it.

Rafe suddenly dropped both of his arms to your legs and lifted you to sit on the counter. The sudden movement startled you into letting out a little squeal of surprise, but he swallowed it up with another kiss.

You draped your arms over his shoulders and he leaned all of his weight on the counter. In the background, you barely heard the coffee kick off and your roommate moving around in her room. Rafe brought a hand up to stroke up and down your thigh, fully distracting you again.

The two of you only broke apart when Rafe’s alarm started going off. He pulled away, annoyed, and then cursed when he realized what time it was. Helping you down, he told you, “We’ve got 30 minutes to get to the res.”

After quickly fixing two to-go mugs, you let Rafe pull you out of the apartment to his truck. For once, he didn’t pick any music, just let the radio play softly in the background while the two of you sipped on coffee. You rolled the window down and let one arm hang out the side.

Rafe reached over and grabbed your other hand, bringing it to his lips to kiss softly without looking up from the road. You grinned at him, “You’re soft as fuck, Cameron.”

He laughed, “Only for you, sweetheart.”

The sky started to lighten as the two of you drove and you left turned your focus back out the window. By the time Rafe parked, the sun had started to rise, and Rafe finally plugged his phone in to play a song.

“Something soft?” he asked.

You nodded and queued up something before hopping out. Rafe grabbed a blanket from the backseat and pulled the tailgate down. It was the blanket the two of you normally sat on to watch the sunsets, so you assumed Rafe wanted to sit back there together for it.

Grabbing the coffees, you walked around the truck to join him just as the song started playing through the speakers.

Feels like we’re on the edge right now / I wish that I could say I’m proud / I’m sorry that I let you down / let you down

You climbed up with him and settled in, your back against his chest. Rafe rested his chin on your head and you shut your eyes for a few seconds to let it all soak in.

I feel like every time I talk to you, you’re in an awful mood / what else can I offer you / there’s nothing left right now, I gave it all to you

“What am I going to do?” you whispered to Rafe.

“I don’t know, sweetheart,” he told you, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

All these voices in my head get loud / and I wish that I could shut them out / I’m sorry that I let you down

“But we’ll figure it out,” he told you, sounding totally sure.

The sun slowly crept up as the two of you sat in silence, both hoping that things were going to turn out okay.

Five: You Make My Dreams (Come True)

“I hate men,” you said from your spot laying on the floor, “why are they the worst.”

Rafe laughed, nudging your hip with his foot, “Come on, sweetheart, I think some Waffle House will cheer you up, huh?”

“Nothing can cheer me up right now. Maybe alcohol.”

“You can’t get drunk.”

“Why not?” you demanded, a little childishly.

“Because you have an interview tomorrow, and it’s just a game.”

You were offended, staring at him open-mouthed, “I know you didn’t just tell me that the Leafs getting eliminated from the playoffs is just a game.”

Rafe didn’t respond, just kept looking at you, hand held out to help you up from the floor. You huffed and stubbornly stayed down, “No, I will throw myself off a balcony before going with you for that disrespect.”

With a sigh, Rafe bent down and pulled you up, you fighting him the entire way. He shook you gently, “Knock it off, mamas.”

“No, you can’t tell me what to do.”

“I can carry you, and I will, so you may as well just walk.”

Which was a good point. You crossed your arms and tilted your chin up, “Fine, Waffle House it is.”

“Fine,” he agreed, following you out of the apartment. Rafe tried to start conversation a few times during the walk to the Waffle House down the street, but you weren’t having it. After blatantly ignoring his attempts, he finally gave up.

“Rafe,” you asked, after a few seconds.

“What?”

“Can you play Hall and Oates? I think it might be good for me to hear.”

He raised his eyebrows, “Are you going to have a breakdown on the side of the road if I play it?”

“No,” which was a total lie and both of you knew it, but Rafe, being the accommodating boyfriend that he is, played it.

What I want, you’ve / And it might be hard to handle

And your eyes immediately filled with tears, just like both of you knew would happen. Rafe wrapped you into a hug while you cried, still playing the song so you could let it out.

Oh yeah, well well you / you make my dreams come true

Sniffling, you told him, “I thought it was their year.”

“I know, baby,” he soothed, hand running up and down your back.

“I want them to succeed and be happy.”

Again, he said, “I know.”

“It’s mostly the refs’ faults anyway, you know the league is dedicated to sucking Bruin dick.”

Rafe snorted, “I do know, yes.”

Softly and sadly, you sang along, “You make my dreams come true.”

The song finished and Rafe tucked his phone away, giving you one last squeeze before pulling away. You sighed and the two of you resumed walking toward Waffle House. He told you, “My dad is a big Bruins guy.”

“WHAT?!”

+ One: Outnumbered

Throughout your relationship, Rafe was always the more put-together one. He always had his shit together while you tended to be a little louder and messier. While you had some experience with handling him in this state, it wasn’t much.

You figured something must’ve been wrong when he didn’t answer any of your texts, but you weren’t sure what. He’d flown home for Thanksgiving, he normally didn’t because it was only a few days, but his sister was going to be in town and he hadn’t seen her in a while. You were invited, but your parents wanted to visit you for the day, so you stayed behind.

When your parents left, you stayed in and watched football, not really wanting to do anything except talk to Rafe who promised to watch one of the games with you over FaceTime. Unfortunately, it was halftime and you hadn’t heard from him.

In fact, you didn’t hear from him until that night. You were getting ready for bed when your phone finally vibrated and you answered it, mid washing your face.

“Hey, bubba.”

“Hey, babe.”

“Get caught up today?” you asked, rinsing the cleanser off.

He laughed humorlessly, and you felt something in your stomach, “I did, my dad had some thoughts he wanted to share with me.”

“Bruins fan dad?”

“The very same.”

You grinned, “Well I’m sure they weren’t valid then.”

Rafe paused for a few seconds, “Well, maybe they were a little valid.”

“Tell me what he said, and I’ll let you know for sure.”

It was silent, you could barely hear Rafe’s breathing, before he continued, “Just that I’m wasting my time. And I’m gonna come running back to him when I can’t get a job with this pointless degree.”

Which, where the fuck do you even start with that. Then, you remembered, scrambling up, you told Rafe to hold on while you grabbed your laptop and pulled up Spotify. You’d found a song and been saving it to show him, but there was no time like the present.

“Listen to this song I found.”

He hummed in agreement as it started up.

Don’t tell me this is all for nothin’ / I can only tell you one thing / on the nights you feel outnumbered / baby I’ll be out there somewhere

You felt unsure as the song went on and he didn’t react. The song played on, you tapping your fingers against your knees anxiously. Normally you could tell what Rafe was thinking based on his facial expression, and you wish you’d switched to FaceTime before starting the song.

There’ll be days when it’s difficult / but I ask you never leave behind the reciprocal / we’re past that / love is not designed for the cynical / so we have that

Rafe didn’t speak again until the end and it sounded a little choked up, “You found that one for me, huh?”

Slamming your laptop shut, you hit the FaceTime button and waited to respond until you saw his face. Rafe’s eyes were red and his cheeks looked wet and you just wanted to hug him.

“Yeah, that was for you.”

“I love you, you know?” he asked, “probably should’ve waited to tell you in person, but.”

You laughed, “Probably so, but I love you too, Cameron.”

“I’m coming home tomorrow instead of Sunday, come over?”

Settling into your bed, you smiled at him, “Yeah, just let me know.”

His soft smile was burned into your memory that night as you fell asleep restlessly, ready for him to be home with you again.

[bread0nhead]

Heyo hru sorry I dead for a second there loll I was just overwhelmed with school and life anyways I had this cute request where the reader has this healing power where the reader has to sing Healing Incantation it’s from Tangled but when she’s healing the LOV she doesn’t sing she just hum and shigaraki is like why do u always hum which she replies idk I just like too but one day she finds a dead flower or an a bird and she starts singing but doesn’t realize shigaraki was behind her💕

Hello, lovely Z!

Sorry this took so long! I graduated and the final project was a killer.

A/N: I didn’t fallow the request to a T. I will write the first thing that comes to my mind when I read requests. And this came to my mind... which didn’t allow me to follow the request as closely as I usually try. Sorry >_<

Shigaraki x F!reader

Rating: T-16

Healing Incantation

“Y/N and I will handle this mission. The rest of you, I want you to focus on gathering supplies and recruits. I expect some good news when we return.”

You and Tomura Shigaraki handled all missions together. Besides working well together, Tomura wasn’t exactly the most successful at being subtle (as much as he wished he was) about his feelings for you. It was painfully obvious, but everyone also knew he thought it wasn’t obvious at all. He lived in denial that he was so easy to read when it came to his feelings. Missions, always done together. Getting food, always brings you back something as well. Two player game? You’re player two- no one else. Some NPC flirting with you? Dusted. You however, you’re feeling we’re actually a complete mystery to everyone. Everyone figured you were way out of his league, so you didn’t reciprocate Tomuras feelings. On the contrary. You cared deeply about him, so much so, you put him goals before your feelings. He simply cannot be distracted by a relationship, his mission is so important to him... would he even be able to put you first? Now just didn’t feel like the right time.

“It’s time”

You grab your jacket and bag, then follow Tomura closely behind. He’s wearing his full getup. His long black jacket, matching black jeans with a black T and 14 oh so stylish disembodied embalmed hands. Very in season. With kurogiri gone, traveling is primarily on foot. Unless someone steals a car or truck- getting places takes a while. But these are actually your favorite moments. These are the only times Tomura really opens up and has genuine conversations. You just happen to be the only one that gets to relish in these moments.

“Hey, shigs?”

“Hnng i said stop calling me that. It’s weird”

“Well, that’s not happening. Anyways- I was wondering what exactly the reason for this mission?”

“Someone who knows my master wants to join our crew. I remember him hanging around my master sometimes and taking care of business. A pretty shady guy, but he would be a good addition.”

“This is a recruiting mission? Isn’t that usually... Dabi’s thing? He’s kinda the more... people person.”

“Okay, Dabi is not a people person. He’s a fuck boy. Huge difference. Secondly, he doesn’t exactly trust people... so sending someone he doesn’t know won’t help the situation.”

His answer made sense and you continue on your journey in silence. After almost an hour of walking, you and Tomura arrive to a worn down apartment building. You see Tomura dig out a crumbled paper from his pocket and hit the buzzer for the number matching the note. The door unlocks and inside you both proceed with caution. The building was empty and decrepit. It looks like no one outside of junkies has lived here in years.

“Tomura Shigaraki... it’s good to see you again.”

“Yoshio.”

“I am very eager to see how far you have come, and I am sure our boss would be pleased to see us working together by joining your league of villains.”

“Yeah- well I am the boss now. So just don’t fuck up and do as I say, then we’ll work together just fine.”

BANG! BANG!

Two flash grenades go on of your left and right. The sudden blinding lights leave you temporarily vulnerable. You are tackled to the floor- one strong male hero has his knee on your throat and hands secured behind your back. You struggle to break free- but no luck. You can see Tomura fighting off multiple hero’s. He’s taking multiple strikes and you can see him bleeding in various parts of his body. Some other hero’s are either decayed or badly wounded.

“I’m sorry Shigaraki. But you just arent the boss. And these hero’s cut me a pretty good deal if I assisted with your capture.”

The hero pinning you down cuffs you and picks you up and your thrown over his shoulder.

“You’re fucking dead, all of you!!!”

Tomura quickly rushes in Yoshio like a feral mad man. Yoshio is too slow to deflect Tomuras attack and his body is soon turned to ash. You want to use your quirk, but it would effects everyone in the room. You have to get Tomura alone. You have to get out of this oafs sweaty hands! Tomura goes in the offense against your capture. The hero who currently has you flung over his shoulder has a quirk that lets him control metal. He manipulates the pipes in the walls and uses them to fend off Tomura. Shigaraki is able to dodge or decay most of the broken metal pipes, while some manage to tear through his skin. The hero tosses you off of him while still handcuffed behind your back. Both the hero and Shigaraki go into full combat with each other. The hero builds up several defense with metal and continues to control the pipes to attack Tomura long range. You notice some of the other hero’s who were only wounded start to wake up. This needs to end fast. Tomura knows this too. The only way out of here, is through. Tomura ignores the pipes and attacks head on. Decaying the metal walls- breaking through to the hero. Unfortunately, since he could not also block the daggered pipes- he has taken a lot of damage. With just a few more steps- the hero is finally in Tomuras range where he can place his 5 fingers on the hero the turn his body into soot. Tomura rushes over to you once the hero is no more and decays the handcuffs. You wrap his arm around the back of your neck and help him flee the area. Your moving as fast as you can while supporting his body. Being still in the city, you find a near by motel. You gently place Tomuras body in a secluded area by the motel and purchase a room. Going back for your mangled leader, you heave him back up and lead him to the room. Once inside, Tomura collapses onto the bed. You rip off your jacket and shoes and join him on the bed. You prop up his head and move it to your lap. His breathing is labored. Blood stains the bed covers. His hair is sweaty and dirty. His face is a mess with ash. After stroking his hair a few times to calm him down. You remove yourself from under him and start up the shower.

“Tomu... let’s get you out of those cloths and into the shower.”

He’s silent for his response. You take it into your hands to strip him of his cloths. Starting with the decorative hands you begin to hum the lullaby your mother always sang to you before bed. In continuing your song, his breathing stabilizes and the smaller cuts begin to heal. Once capable, you remove his jacket, shoes and socks. The humming got louder, and his wounds continued to heal. Finally you strip him of all his cloths except for his briefs and lead him to the shower. Looking away to give him some privacy, he strips nude and steps into the shower. Tomura drops to the shower floor as the water picked up the blood and dirt, swirling down the drain. He pulled up his knees to his chest for a sense of security.

“I’m going to get you some towels.”

On your entry back into the bathroom, you noticed Tomura has begun to stratch at his neck on already open wounds. His clawing turns the flesh red and bloody.

“Oh, Tomu...”

You remove yourself of all your cloths. As he wallows in anger and self pity, he doesn’t even notice you until your naked body is sitting on the shower floor with him. His hands come to a stop. Eyes are wide and his face is flush. With a gentle smile, you rest your head onto his shoulder.

“Sometimes these walls seem to cave in on me. When I look in your eyes, I feel alive. Some days we say words that don't mean a thing. But when you holding me tight, I feel alive”

Your singing echos on the walls of the shower, reverberating your voice beautifully. Sinking into the comfort of the moment, Tomura lets his guard down and places his head on top of yours. His wounds begin to close. Broken bones begin to mend.

“Make it last forever. Come on, baby, won't you hold on to me, hold on to me? You and I together. Come on, baby, won't you hold on to me, hold on to me? Blue”

With each lyric sung, the wounds close more and more until completely closed again. The water is warm on your aching body- it calms your muscles. Taking the complementary sample of shampoo, you lather your hands and massage your fingers into his scalp.

“Each day I feel so blessed to be looking at you. 'Cause when you open your eyes, I feel alive. My heart beats so damn quick when you say my name. When I'm holding you tight, I'm so alive. Now let's live it up. Make it last forever. Come on, baby, won't you hold on to me, hold on to me?”

Your nails tangling into his long hair feels so soothing to him. Your calming his itch without causing any damage. He’s listening to your song with focus- carefully absorbing each word and the meaning to it. His body has fully healed at this point. No bruises or scrapes. Even his mind feels a little more healed. He’s not angry or anxious. He lifts his head up and you follow. He’s looking you in the eyes as you both sit under the showers stream. The suds from the shampoo dance off his body- the smell is delicious. It’s a vanilla citrus aroma.

“You and I together. Come on, baby, won't you hold on to me, hold on to me?

Blue

Make it last forever. Come on, baby, won't you hold on to me, hold on to me?

You…”

Neither of you breaks eye contact as you bask in the soothing moment. The warm fruity fragrance. The hot water melting away any grime. You inch closer him, your bodies are side by side. Faces just an inch apart. Your lost in his red eyes. Your lips part as you each cautiously move closer. Closing your eyes welcomes him in. Tomura takes the last move to completely close the space. His lips are locked with yours. The water coats every part of your skin with drenching water- but neither pay any mind. The kiss is long. You don’t want to leave, you want time to stop here and never move forward. Tomura wants to feel the softness of your lips forever, never to leave the comfort of your embrace.

On a motel shower floor, covered in blood and dirt. You decided it’s finally time.

/END

Song: Blue by Beyoncé

[danihow]

4 a.m

Bucky x Fem!reader

Marvel Cinematic Universe

Summary: Bucky calls you at 4 am because he missed you, and you pick up.

Warnings: Language? Idk.

Word count: 1.6k

A/N: Kinda based on the song “4get” by Voilá. And this is the first English one-shot I’ve ever wrote, so feedback is well accepted in here. Enjoy!

The phone was ringing wildly from the table at the side of the bed; you’d just agreed to yourself to let it ring, it was pretty damn late at night and you got to wake up really early in the morning. At the time the phone ringed, again, you extended your hand, passing it around searching for the goddamn phone, you just wondered who the fuck was calling at that hours; they should know that anything done passed 12 pm was between god and them, not you. 

When your hand finally found it you sat, pushing your messy hair out of your face. Your eyes closing when they met with the bright screen of the phone. It took you a couple of seconds and slightly opening your eyes to read the name on the screen, yet it wasn’t a number you had registered.

“Hello?” You answered with confusion and your eyes closed, still sleepy. When your voice got to Bucky’s ears a sad smile posed on her face, his mind imagining you with your messy hair, closed eyes and probably rubbing them with the palm of your hand, trying to wake up a little more, just how you were when he came home from work to the apartment you both shared. “If this is a prank call I’m blocking you” You said when you got no answer, just about to hang up.

“No, no, ‘m sorry.” He said before you tried to hung up. When you heard him you finally woke completely up, your eyes widened and your brows went up with surprise, you hadn’t talked in more than a year. 

“Y’know, I would love to hate you, I- I really would Y/N.”

His whisper to the phone was sad, melancholic, making you to furrow your brows even more confused. You were about to reply defensive but he interrupted you.

“Hate your smile, your eyes, the little wrinkles in your eyes when you laugh and sound like a pig.” 

“Barnes are you drunk?”

“I don’t know actually, I don’t think I can get drunk anymore.” He said sincerely to you while looking ath the glass of whiskey. “But hey, shut up a sec and listen to me. Y/N”. He shushed you while extending his index flesh finger to air, just as if you were standing in front of him. “I- I’m sorry.” He muttered while letting out a heavy sigh. “I know I messed up badly, I was stupid in every possible way.” He said, putting beside his empty liquor glass. “Goddammit, I miss you. I really miss you.”

“Buck, you should’ve thought of that before breaking up with me, a year ago.” You said, sitting in your bed with your legs crossed.

“I know; I- I know. Steve is always telling me the same shit and I’m sick of knowing he’s right.” The frustration on Bucky’s voice was noticeable, especially by you. He was trying to get drunk with some whiskey but failing. “Every morning I wake up and get reminded of my mistake.”

You stand up from your bed in silence, walking to the little balcony your apartment had, looking at the city that never slept.

Both Bucky and you knew he was going to regret this call later, but he felt like he should, no, he had to get that weight off of his shoulders.

“You remember that time I got sick and you tried to make some soup and ended up burning it? I still not know how the heck you did that.” He said after a little silence. “You came to the bedroom and your face was a poem, you didn’t knew how to tell me you burned the boiling water and we needed some knew pots.”

“Shut up Barnes, go home and sleep.” You said, not wanting to listen to him and that bullshit. You looked up trying to figure out the hour; it must be really late.

“Were we worth it?” He asked, looking by the bar’s windows to the cars passing through the street.

“Bucky…”

“No, answer me Y/N.” He told. “Were we worth it?”

A heavy sigh escaped through you lips, you leaned your head down with tiredness. “We were, yeah, at the beginning, when it was all pink.” You said. “But we were not worth it later, when all we did was argue, arguing day and night, face to face or by phone; at that point it wasn’t worth it anymore.” 

“I- I want to know something…” He started, just as if he didn’t ask enough.

“Go ahead.” You said, sitting on a little bench you had, still looking at the tall buildings in front of you.

“Why you didn’t come back? Why you didn’t stopped me from ending us?” 

Your heart felt heavy, you knew the answer perfectly but weren’t sure if he wanted to hear it, if you wanted to accept it. “We… We weren’t working anymore Buck, you gave up on us and I didn’t wanted to keep trying, it wasn’t worth fighting for a lost relationship where we were unhappy about 80 percent of the time. I didn’t wanted that in my life, or yours.” You said, all the bitter unhappy moments hitting back on you like a truck. 

“Oh, alright.” He said and the line went on silence, Hotline Bling sounding on the background at the bar. “So… um, I think I should let you sleep, sorry.”

“Don’t worry, is not like I got to work in the morning.”

“Oh really?”

“Of course I do Bucky, is Tuesday. Not all of us go around saving the world on weird schedules.” You said rolling your eyes. “And is fucking four, you should be sleeping too.”

“Yeah, whatever, I can deal with Sam’s annoying ass in the noon.” He said, causing a smile on your face while remembering how those two got along, you missed those stupid men too. 

“And how are Sam and Steve doing? Does Steve still have that keeping-up-with-pop-culture list?” You asked when the call turned a little bit more comfortable, it was probably just the really late vibe hitting in.

“Sam is annoying as always, and Steve, well… is Steve.” He said, both of you let out a light laugh at the simplicity of the answer; yet you knew exactly what he meant.

Silence installed himself again when both of your laughs vanished slowly, it was a weird-not-uncomfortable silence where you both drowned in your feelings and thoughts. You felt like it was your turn to ask questions.

“What did you felt when we were together?” You asked concerned.

Bucky’s mind stopped working for a second before answering, that was a good damn question. “It all felt like it was meant to be there, like you were the one putting my life together, you made me feel normal again. I loved you.” He thought his words enough so he wasn’t too much a weirdo. “And you?”

You kept silence, waiting for the right words to come. “When we were together I felt like all my worries were kicked out of my life, like everything was in order with me and my life and I would never let you go.” That last words were like stone in both hearts, realizing how messed up everything got later.

The weird silence came in again; it was like he didn’t leave at all. 

“Oh fuck it.” You heard Bucky cursing under his breath. “Look, I’m in a bar at four in the morning, paying fourteen dollars for a drink that I don’t know what it is, they have been playing songs of this man all night long and somehow you are the only thing running through my mind all damn night. I know we messed up, like really messed up. But what if we tried again?” He concluded, spilling all what he really wanted to say to you when he first called but didn’t had the guts to say.

“You think that if it didn’t work out once it will work out later?” 

“Yes, I do. Maybe it was just not the right moment for us to happen. But I need you back in my life, Y/N please, give me, us a chance again.” He pleaded to the phone.

“Buck…” And that’s it, that is all you could say at the moment, it was really late to be thinking coherently and you needed to give him an answer.

After some more seconds of silence, he understood, nodding to himself and trying to swallow the pill. “Sure, ‘m sorry, didn’t meant to disturb.” He said finally regretting the whole call. “Goodnight Y/N” He said defeated, lowering his glaze and his mouth curving downwards knowing it was time to hung up.

“No, Buck, wait.” You said when you heard him sighing. “Let’s start slowly, as friends.” “Friends don’t feel this way.” He thought while listening to you.

“What about Dunkin’ Donuts at 2 o’ clock on Friday?” You suggested, making him smile to the phone.

“Dunkin’ Donuts at two, I’ll see you there.” He sentenced, nodding his head as if you could see him.

“By the way, how you got my number?” You asked finally thinking about it.

He made weird shh noises with his mouth. “Oh no, I’m losing reception, what a shame, see you on Friday. bye!” He said childishly making you laugh and forming a dumb smile in his face.

“Night.”

“Night doll.” He said just before you finally hung up.

Both of you were left with a bright smile on your face, you just looked silently at the lights and buildings of New York as he paid for the check and got out of the bar. What a hell of a night.

[bnhaohmy]

I can't lose you

Shigaraki x F!reader

Words; 0.9k

Summary; you wanted to go on a mission for once, but Tomura felt wary of letting you go out after last time. He was right to be wary

Warnings; angst. I'm sorry if I break your heart, I'm just in that kind of mood 🥺 it really isnt that angst but idk. It's kinda trash tbh

You hum softly as you sit on the counter of the bar, looking over to Shigaraki and the others as they went over their new plan. He was trying to section the members as best he could but he was one short, meaning he would have to have someone from the sidelines join in. Your head peaked up hearing this.

"Tomura...I can go" you speak as you hop off the bar and walk over to the group, putting your hand on his arm.

He instantly tensed up and shook his head, "Not happening. I'll just have Kurogiri go." He said firmly, which only caused you to pout.

"I'm not a helpless little girl. I want to go and help for once Tomura. Please, you never let me do anything and I'm here all alone anyways when you all leave" you whine at him and give him your best pouty eyes

Shigaraki sighs and nods "fine. Fine. You're with Dabi then.." he murmurs and then leaves the room as he looked visibly upset. You bite your lip and quickly follow after him "Tomura..." you whisper and pull at his wrist

"Let go." He growls out and pulls his hand roughly away from you as you falter in your stance but quickly catch your balance. You sigh quietly and play nervously with your fingers, you've really pissed him off this time.

You never understood his worry about you as you knew how to handle yourself in combat and were versatile to where you could play any point of the fight. You just assumed his worry came after you both became an item. Neither of you liked to point that fact out but you had fallen for each other and Tomura felt his heart clench every time you asked to go fight.

He told you no everytime only because he was scared of losing the only person who had every truly loved and care for him, he didn't want that to happen. He was tired of your constant begging though so he gave up, he would just have to protect you as if there was no tomorrow. At least he would try.

You stood quietly with Dabi as he scoped out the area before he turned back to you "use your damn quirk. I cant see anyone but I hear something."

You bite your lip and nod before closing your eyes and then lifting your head up before your eyes snapped open and you looked to your right "someone's to our right and in front of us.." you speak quietly and pulled your knife from its holster on your thigh.

Everything started happening faster than you could comprehend as even Dabi was caught off guard. You try to get your grounding but only end up feeling a slice come across your stomach and your arm. You bite your lip to prevent the squeal of pain that was coming up your throat and looked up to see the area covered in Dabi's flames. You sigh in relief before collapsing to your knees, doubling over in pain.

Dabi walked over and grimaced at the sight of your bleeding body. "Fuck Y/N, we have to get you back. Otherwise we'll both be dead" he said and attempted to help you up but only got a cry of pain from your lips. "Shit..."

Shigaraki growls when he makes it over to you and Dabi, Kurogiri and Toga right behind him. "What the hell happened to the pl-" he cuts his rant to dabi off when he saw you. His go wide and he bends down next to you "Y/N?" He asks and sighs softly seeing you still breathing. "Kurogiri get us back to bar now." He demanded "we have to get her fixed..."

You screamed out as he tried to pick you up with the help of Dabi, his face scrunching up when he heard your pained call. He sighs and holds you close to his body as he walks through the warp gate, keeping pressure on your wound. "I told you this would happen.." he murmurs as he watches you black out.

You awake inside your room, your entire body feeling like you got hit by a truck. You whimper out as you try to sit up, alerting Toga who was sitting watch by the door.

"You're awake!!" She cried out and clapped her hands before running over and hugging you as gently as she could. You smile gently and lean into her touch as you couldn't really hug her back. "Let me go get the others...we've all been so worried about you for the past week. Shigaraki didn't think you would ever wake up.." she spoke gently before leaving the room.

A few moments later she came back with everyone and you smiled shakily at them before your eyes landed on Shigaraki who looked more broken than ever. "Tomura..." you spoke gently and with a shaky hand, you grabbed for him.

Shigaraki looks up and his eyes go soft, walking over to you quickly and grabbing your hand within his own gloved one. "I'm so glad you're okay..." he murmurs and looks down at you as everyone slowly flies back out of the room.

You sigh softly hearing his words "I-I'm sorry for arguing with you about going on missions so much...I don't want to after that.." you whisper to him, your gaze lowering as a gentle smile danced onto his lips.

"It's okay, but just listen to me when I tell you no. I wasn't trying to belittle you, I was trying to keep you safe..." he whispers

"I would have died if I lost you..."