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#if i had known it would get so much attention
sleep-0-deprived · 2 days
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What would it be like yandere bully vs yandere jock fighting over the nerd reader?
Yandere jock, bully fighting over nerd male reader head cannons~. ૮ ྀི◞ ⸝⸝ ◟ ྀིა
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For the sake of this post I’ll call Yandere bully(Damian) and Yandere jock(Jake) <33
When Damian first started bullying you it was out of the obsession he had built on you over the summer. Jake first noticed you when he was in study hall and was assigned you as his tutor, the two of you became really close during the tutoring sessions so much that he’d invite you to his place just wanting to be around you as much as he could. Dumping his cheerleader girlfriend asking you to come to his games even trying to get you to wear his jacket insisting it was just him “wanting you to show team spirit for him”.
Damian hating how close you got with Jake turning into pure hatred for the jock, it starts with Damian being a little meaner to you trying to get your attention nearly tormenting you daily in hopes you’d just focus on him. Jake always pushing Damian away or making him go away whenever he’s around. The two ending up going at it figuring daily, the cameras Jake had installed in your bedroom whenever he was over suddenly getting hacked by Damian.
Jake who asks you out getting you to some how say he’s taking a video of him having you in the backseat of his truck with your legs held spread wide getting stretched out with your lips making an “O” shape whimpering out “J-ake~!” Over and over when he hits your bundle of nerves penetrating you. Jake showing the video to Damian whispering “think he likes me more Mr bully?” In a mocking tone just to rile him up into a fury nearly having a tantrum only making his obsession over you grow.
Damian who pulls you out of lunch just to fuck you bent over in the back of the library, his hand over your mouth huffing degrading words in your ear “if I knew you were such’a damn slut I woulda given you a good fucking so long ago” his hands harshly punching your hips “did that dumb jock fuck you like this hm? Did he thrusts like this pretty boy?” Jerking your hair wanting to be the only man to ruin your hole—to touch and grip your skin, not that jock.
Jake stalking you after school making sure Damian doesn’t get any free chances with you. Jake giving you rides having your head between his thighs sucking him off behind school in the back of his truck just taking pictures without you knowing bragging and mocking Damian saying “clearly he likes my cock more? Don’t ya think Damian?” He’d caption the photo he sent Damian just to further fight wanting it known you chose Jake.
You finally snapping at the two of them arguing you weren’t in the middle threatening to never speak to either of them, they didn’t seem to like that, them ending teamed up on you for the greater good of keeping you. Damian In front of you in the janitors closet face in your chest knocking your books aside with his cock deep inside your ass having Jake behind you his cock rubbing against Damian’s with his hands on your hips holding you up in place murmuring “he’s being so good for us ain’t he Damian” only earning grunts and a “yeah he is” from Damian. Both them deciding then and there you were theirs, no choice needed you’d be passed and shared by only them.
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Do you have any recommendations for gaining access to these books? I have a pretty long list of ones I want to read but can't afford most of them. The library has the big ones (Whipping Girl, Detransition Baby, Nevada) but the newer or less well known ones have been difficult to find
No this is actually so real though. Let's talk about it.
One of the big problems that I'm trying to address here is the fact that there is a lack of ability for trans books to reach their perhaps core audience, trans people. Over the last few years trans librarians have been trying to increase the number of trans books in circulation, but that's super contingent on where you live. Not to mention the fact that, at least in the US, states are actively trying to criminalize circulating trans books in libraries.
I know Tumblr is allergic to economics a lot of the time, but you've gotta look at the math to understand why this is the current state of things. Essentially it's a vicious cycle. Lots of trans people can't afford to buy a $25 hardcover on a whim, and traditional publishers put a lot of stock into how well a book performs on release, cause that's how they make money. So when the core audience can't afford it and isn't marketable, they register that as a lower demand, which means that fewer trans books get published, fewer end up in libraries, and the cost of an individual book is driven higher. Low demand, high price. Then because the price is high, trans people cant afford the books, and the cycle continues.
It is the dilemma of the transfemme author that most of their core audience is also gonna be transfemme. It's a self-selecting process that's very hard to break out of. And at the end of the day, there just isn't very much money to go around in the trans community because trans people so frequently get cut off from generational wealth. So when you get an ecosystem of transfemmes selling books to other transfemmes who also sell books to them....
I took a class on the Sociology of Art a few years ago, and one of my core takeaways was that the boundaries of a field (yes my teacher liked Bourdieu, come for her ass, not mine) are fundamentally governed by institutions and entities with the money and power to dictate their rules of play. In Althusser's language, you would call those ISAs (Ideological State Apparatuses). When you read Weber, he talks about how culture needs to have some level of social legitimation in order to become a force of power in the world (I butchered that but it's the gist lol). And it's like.
The people who have the money to read the books dictate which books receive the money. Organizations like Lambda Literary, presses, big name publishers, etc. One of the big problems in the field of trans literature up to this point is that the only people who've had the money to produce social legitimation from the organizing schema/matrix of an ISA have also only chosen to read a very small slice of the extant literature. Then, because those non-profits and presses and companies only champion a small selection of books, that in turn dictates for those who have less money which of those books deserve social attention, critical acclaim, sales, library slots, etc.
And like, all of that is an illusion, but it produces a material reality for the transfemme author. It dictates the material conditions for the reproduction of said literature and who can participate in it.
So, what's to be done about it?
"Buzz" is a big deal in the publishing industry. A good review, an award, a thinkpiece - all of that can be the difference between a successful book and a flop. Publishers look for that. If nobody talks about a book and it doesn't sell well, they'll drop the author faster than you can say Susan. Again, vicious cycle. But like, at the end of the day, a "field," an "ISA," a "legitimated" work of art, that's all just a class prerogative. The different between a Very Important Literary Blog and a "person talking about books on the internet" is money. Like. It's just money. The reality of it is really banal.
It's who has the money to read books. It's who has the money and time to write about books. It's who has the money to gain institutional access to book. It's who has the money to read enough to say, "Oh, well that might seem true, but if you look at X, Y, and Z it's clearly not." It takes money to fact check. It takes money to challenge institutional myths. It takes money because when an institution makes a claim about a book and none of the people who care enough to argue with them have the cash to challenge it, the claim tends to stand.
And like, the honest truth is that between the books, the website, and the education, I've spent a lot of money bringing this website online in the form you're reading it in. A lot of the books I've read were really fucking expensive. I grew up in a wealthy family, my parents were accepting. They have both the means and the desire to support my passion projects. I'm lucky.
The goal of The Transfeminine Review is to create at least one independently trans-run website that can challenge that brand of institutional legitimation work from non-profits and big publishers and cis outlets, a website that can actually highlight transfeminine literature as it exists in the world, not as the Big 5 publishers have dictated it. Topside, Metonymy, Arsenal Pulp, LittlePuss, etc. They've all taken on that challenge from the angle of producing books, but there hasn't been a corollary trans secondary ecosystem dedicated to documenting and critiquing them. Or there is, but it's extremely diffuse and hard to find if you don't know exactly what you're looking for. Then there are the general queer outlets, like them. and whatnot, and they do their best but literature is a side hustle at best. There's the queer-helmed literary outlets like Electric Lit (shout out Denne Michele Norris) but they spend most of their time talking about cis authors. None of it is designed to help or review self-published literature from poor authors, and let's be frank, most transfeminine publishing is still done indie or self.
It's an investment, essentially. On the longshot, the hope is that this website will inspire others to do similar work, and that eventually through the collective efforts of trans authors and their readership, we can begin to change the math on trans publishing and help to spread it to a wider audience.
Now.
None of this changes the current reality that trans lit is expensive.
Unless you're lucky, you're probably not gonna find much trans lit at the local library even if you dig for it. Another good place to find free trans books is transreads.org, but their selection is mostly non-fiction, and the fiction is, again, largely the same few books you can find elsewhere. Another good online queer library is https://www.queerliberationlibrary.org/, which might be a good place to look (shoutout to Skye for bringing it to my attention!)
There are a couple of cheaper places to find trans books. If you shop around on itch.io, a lot of self-published trans authors have "name your price" models, which can be more accessible. Creators on itch will also bundle their work on a fairly regular basis, so you can get like 10-20 books for $10, which is, by my token, an excellent price.
If there's a particular author you're interested in, a lot of self-pub trans authors have Patreon accounts where they serialize their novels. You also can find serial (pre-edit) versions of a bunch of books on Scribblehub.
This has gotten steadily less affordable over the last few years cause Amazon is evil, but Kindle Unlimited ($11.99 a month, but there's a free trial) has thousands of trans books. Most of them are erotica, but like, there are a lot of hidden gems in there, and if you're a voracious enough reader, then it'll definitely be much cheaper per book than buying trad.
The problem with all of these, though, is that they tend to favor specific genres and tropes. Like there's only so much variety on itch.io or Scribblehub or transreads.org or KU. So if you like the genre conventions, then awesome! But if you don't it's probably not for you.
And none of it will give you access to some of the rare older tradpub books or the new but scarce releases that I've been going through unless you're willing to pay the full price for them.
I wish I had a better answer, but that's unfortunately the current state of the industry :/
Hopefully this ramble is helpful.
Beth
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2amriize · 3 days
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˚⟡˖ RIIZE angry confessions
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ᡣ𐭩 masterlist genre angst, fluff pairing riize x reader
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ᯓ★ SHOTARO
Shotaro had been in love with you for a while, but he always felt that you only saw him as a good friend. Because of this, he decided not to confess his feelings. You two had known each other for years, and although he only realized his feelings a few months ago, he had always felt a bit strange when he saw you with other guys. Back then, he didn't admit it, but he was jealous. He couldn't understand why, despite laughing with him more than anyone else, you still seemed to prefer other guys. Deep down, he felt like he wasn't enough.
Since he realized he was in love with you, you hadn’t mentioned liking any other guys, so Shotaro hadn't felt jealous in a while—until it happened.
One day, while you were having an afternoon snack at a café with Shotaro, something you did often, you spotted a guy from your class who you thought was really cute entering the café. You couldn’t help but feel nervous.
"Oh my god..." you murmured, trying to look away.
“What’s up?” Shotaro asked, turning to see what had caught your attention.
“It’s that guy from my class… He’s…”
“Oh, do you have a crush on him?” Shotaro glanced at the guy for a few seconds before turning back around and letting out a small sigh. “He’s not good for you.”
“Huh? Why do you say that?”
“He looks like trouble. And I don’t think he’s right for you.”
Shotaro had never said anything like that to you before, and it made you a bit angry. What was he implying?
“Since when do you care about what's good for me, Shotaro?” you asked, giving him a serious look, clearly upset by his words. He looked back at you in silence for a few seconds.
“Since I…” He bit his lip and shook his head. “Nevermind.”
“Since what, Shotaro? Why do you suddenly care about the guys I like? It’s none of your business…”
“Because I’m in love with you, Y/N!” Shotaro cut you off, standing up and looking at you intensely. “That’s why, alright? Are you happy now?” He grabbed his things and stormed out of the café.
ᯓ★ EUNSEOK
It was the way Eunseok looked at you that made everyone else realize how much he liked you. Well, everyone except for you. From the moment he met you, Eunseok knew he had feelings for you, but there wasn’t much he could do about it because at the time, you were dating someone else.
When you broke up with that guy, Eunseok was there for you whenever you needed him, supporting you. But that was all he could do—be by your side—because he felt like you didn’t see him the same way he saw you. Even though everyone always mentioned how Eunseok looked at you, you would always reply with, “I don’t know why everyone keeps saying that, Eunseok looks at everyone like that…”
To be honest, sometimes you had thought about it—whether Eunseok really had feelings for you like everyone said—but it didn’t make sense to you, so you would quickly brush it off. On the other hand, Eunseok was finding it harder and harder to contain his feelings. It never seemed like the right moment to confess, especially since you had been going through an on-again, off-again relationship with the same guy for a while, something Eunseok couldn’t stand.
“You got back with him again?” Eunseok asked with a sigh as you both sat on the grass at a friend’s birthday party. You had stepped outside to get some fresh air.
“Yeah… I feel like it’s what I should do.”
“Why, Y/N? Sometimes you make the dumbest decisions…”
“Excuse me?” You looked at him, surprised by the way he spoke. Eunseok had always supported you, and this was the first time he sounded frustrated. “It’s not dumb…”
“Isn’t it? To keep chasing after someone who doesn’t treat you the way you deserve?”
“What do you mean, Eunseok? He treats me well… we just have a few little fights sometimes. Besides, I go back to him because he’s the only one who cares about me at the end of the day, because…”
“Oh my god, Y/N, how can you be so blind?” Eunseok interrupted, looking at you with clear frustration.
“What…?”
As he stood up to go back inside, he murmured, “I don’t understand how you can’t see that the person who loves you the most is right in front of you…”
ᯓ★ SUNGCHAN
Sungchan had been looking out for you since day one. You had known each other since elementary school, and ever since then, you had always been together. He was always by your side, making sure you were okay and safe. You two spent so much time together that people who didn’t know you well often thought you were dating, something you always denied immediately to avoid awkwardness.
Sungchan never took it personally when you denied it—he tried to brush it off quickly—until it happened in a situation unlike any other before. You had never had a boyfriend, mostly because you hadn’t really been interested in any guys… until now. There was this one guy you’d been noticing lately, someone you found intriguing, but you hadn’t told anyone about it because it made you a little shy.
To your surprise, your friends invited this guy to a lunch gathering that you and Sungchan were also attending. When you saw him approaching with your friends, you couldn’t hide your nervousness, which Sungchan immediately noticed. And, as usual, the guy asked how long you and Sungchan had been together.
“No, him and me? We’re not a couple. Not at all. Never,” you said quickly, letting out a nervous laugh.
Sungchan stared at you in silence. He couldn’t believe what you had just done. Normally, you would simply say, “No, we’re just friends,” but this time, it felt like you had overreacted, and it hurt him. As you continued talking more with the guy, Sungchan started to feel left out (and jealous), so he let out a small laugh and walked away to another spot.
It took you a few minutes to realize Sungchan was no longer there, behind you, where he had always been. Confused, you quietly excused yourself from the group to go find him. After searching for a bit, you finally found him leaning against a tree, sipping his drink. You approached and touched his shoulder, and he looked at you with an expression you had never seen on him before.
“Why did you leave, Sungchan? Did something happen?”
“It seemed like you didn’t need me there anymore,” he said, turning his gaze away from you.
“What do you mean?”
“I didn’t know you hated the idea of people seeing us as a couple… or rather, that he saw us as a couple.”
“Sungchan, you know that’s not it. We’re not dating, you know? I always say the same thing. I don’t get why you’re acting like this now…”
“I’ve been following you around like a lost puppy since the day we met, yet you couldn’t see?” Sungchan turned to face you, locking eyes with you for a few seconds.
“What… what do you mean…?” you murmured, feeling your cheeks heat up.
“It’s… nevermind,” he said, walking away.
ᯓ★ WONBIN
Wonbin was a friend of one of your friends, and although you had met him several times before, you didn’t really start talking until a few months ago. To both of your surprise, you had a lot of common interests, which meant you had been talking more and more lately.
Whenever you hung out with your group of friends, it wasn’t unusual for you and Wonbin to spend the entire time together, which led to people starting to suspect there was something going on between you two. However, everyone knew that you had been interested in another guy for a while, a guy who constantly gave you mixed signals. But you were so blinded by the way he treated you that you couldn’t see he was just playing with your feelings.
This was something Wonbin knew, and it was starting to bother him more and more. At first, he didn’t care much, but the more he got to know you, the more frustrated he became with how this guy was treating you. And that’s when he realized that maybe he didn’t see you just as a friend anymore. The moment he came to that realization, he regretted it, knowing that you only had eyes for someone else, and he felt like you’d never notice him.
One evening, you were hanging out with your friends, and for some reason, you all decided to drink. Wonbin wasn’t very good at drinking, so it didn’t take long for him to get tipsy, his cheeks flushed. When Wonbin got drunk, he became even more affectionate than usual. You had also been drinking, but it didn’t affect you as much.
At one point, Wonbin went outside to get some fresh air because he was feeling a bit dizzy, and you followed him to check if he was okay. While outside, you started talking about the guy you liked, and unlike usual, Wonbin didn’t respond or pay much attention. When you noticed he was staring off into the distance, you looked at him.
“Wonbin? Are you okay?”
He stared at you for a few seconds, and just when it seemed like he was about to say something, he sighed and buried his face in his hands, muttering, “Do you like that guy so much that you can’t see what he’s doing to you?”
“Huh? What are you talking about, Wonbin? He treats me really well…”
“Yeah, that’s what you think…”
“You don’t have the right to talk about him like that when you don’t even know him,” you said, getting annoyed at how Wonbin was speaking badly about him.
After a few seconds of silence, Wonbin looked at you and shook his head.
“…This is why I knew I shouldn’t have gotten close to you.”
“What are you talking about, Wonbin?”
“I just… wish you wouldn’t keep seeing that guy.”
“You don’t have the right to say that.”
“I wish I did.”
ᯓ★ SEUNGHAN
Everyone, even you, knew how much Seunghan liked you. But you always ignored his feelings because you preferred not to face that reality. You had been friends for so many years that you didn't want to risk your friendship over it. Still, you couldn't deny that you treated him differently from everyone else, being much more affectionate and always relying on him when you needed someone. Seunghan was always there for you, no matter what. It didn’t matter if you were on the other side of the city and only needed a pen—he would come and bring it to you. That’s how much you meant to him, and everyone could see it.
That’s why, when he heard from others that you were starting to get to know another guy, he felt his heart break a little. He knew you two weren’t a couple and that he had never confessed his feelings, but it still hurt to find out from someone else, especially when you knew how he felt. The thought of you with another guy was something he couldn't stand.
He tried to distance himself from you for a while after hearing the news, but he just couldn’t. He couldn’t say no when you asked him to pick you up from class to take you home, even though he knew you probably had an important date. Despite knowing this date might be with the other guy, he couldn’t bring himself to refuse, so he picked you up just as you had asked.
The whole ride, he was quiet and serious, something you found odd since Seunghan had never behaved like this around you. He was always so sweet and cheerful when he was with you.
"Seunghan, is something wrong? You seem really serious," you asked when he parked in front of your house after the silent ride.
"No, don't worry," he murmured without looking at you.
"I know something’s bothering you…"
"Don't you have to go get ready for your date?"
The way Seunghan looked at you and the tone he used when mentioning your date made you realize he knew about it, and he seemed quite upset.
"Seunghan, you know I care about you a lot, but it’s just…"
"You know. You know I love you and took full advantage of the fact that I'd do anything for you. And I know that. I just kept at it, hoping that one day you'd value me just as much."
You froze after hearing Seunghan’s words. You couldn’t help but feel bad for making him feel this way, though it was never your intention. Before you could even respond, Seunghan spoke again.
"Just… get out. You’re going to be late."
ᯓ★ SOHEE
There had always been a sort of romantic tension between you and Sohee. Both of you were playful and touchy with each other, but that was all—just tension. Even though you both probably had feelings for each other, neither of you had confessed.
In fact, you were always waiting for him to confess, but that moment never seemed to come. The longer you waited, the more tired you grew of holding onto hope. Yet, despite that, you couldn’t seem to let go of the idea of him.
Knowing all of this, you still couldn’t ignore the guy who approached you at the party. You had come to the university party with Sohee, but he had gone off to talk to his friends. The guy, someone you hadn’t seen before, wasted no time approaching you once he saw Sohee wasn’t by your side.
You two talked for a while, and the guy even brushed your arm occasionally while locking eyes with you. You couldn’t deny feeling a bit nervous around him. He was charming and very attractive. After chatting for a bit, you excused yourself to go to the bathroom, promising you’d be right back.
You didn’t expect to find Sohee waiting for you outside the bathroom. You quickly noticed he’d had a few drinks.
"Sohee, have you been drinking?"
"Who was that guy?"
"Are you talking about the one I was talking to earlier? He’s a new guy at our faculty. He’s pretty nice. I was about to go back and talk to him."
"Don’t go back to him," Sohee muttered, lowering his head.
"Sohee, you can’t decide what I do."
"I know I can’t, but I don’t want you to talk to him again."
"Sohee, you’re just drunk and saying things that don’t make sense," you said, walking past him, heading back to the party.
"Y/n, I love you," you heard Sohee murmur as he grabbed your wrist, only to let it go after a few seconds. You looked at him, stunned, for a moment. "Is that what you wanted to hear? Are you happy now?" he said before walking away into the party, leaving you standing in the hallway, unsure of what to say or do.
ᯓ★ ANTON
You and Anton had been best friends for as long as you could remember. You went to the same school, and your mothers were close friends, so you spent many summers together. Even after graduating, you both ended up attending the same university, so you still saw each other daily.
It felt like you two were inseparable—until you started getting to know another guy. It took you a while to tell Anton about him since you’d never really talked about that kind of stuff before. When you finally did, you thought he took it well at first, but you noticed him starting to act strange, becoming more distant.
Although he said nothing was wrong, he always had excuses to avoid walking home with you, claiming he had plans to study with classmates in a café, something you found odd since he didn’t like studying in public. Even so, you decided to trust him and give him the space he seemed to need.
One day, as you were heading home, you spotted Anton walking in the distance. It had been a while since you’d seen him in person, so you decided to catch up with him. He smiled briefly when he saw you, but then quickly looked away and started walking faster.
"Anton, I feel like you’ve been acting weird these past weeks. Is something wrong?"
"Huh? No, you know… exams, new people… It’s just that. Nothing’s wrong."
"Are you sure? I feel like you’re pulling away from me, and if I’ve done something wrong, I want to know."
"Nothing’s wrong, y/n. You’ve just got other friends now, and I get it," he mumbled coldly. You stood there, thinking for a moment. In high school, you’d made new friends, and yet you and Anton still acted like you always had. Why was this time different?
"I feel like you’ve been off ever since I told you about Ricky…"
"Y/n. I just… don’t want to talk about it."
"Well, I do, Anton. I feel like you’re being selfish, only thinking about how you feel and not about how you’re making me feel," you said, frustrated, stopping in the middle of the street. Anton turned to look at you, serious.
"Well, I’m sorry I fell in love with you, okay? But it happened, and I can’t do shit about it."
"You… what?"
Anton stared at you for a few seconds, pressing his lips together before turning his back on you.
"Forget it, y/n. I’m just tired from all the studying."
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ᡣ𐭩 masterlist taglist: @regularsuh @gacktsa @totheseok @kkumistars @taroddori
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epicbuddieficrecs · 2 days
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Favorite Season 6 fics
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So these used to be called "Fic recs for my BFF", but unfortunately I was unable to sway her to buddie, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ these are just for me now (and you guys too I guess 😅)
Season 6
🔥Curl Up in My Heart and Let Me Keep You by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Animal Transformation | 10K | Teen): When an orange tabby cat starts hanging around the Diaz house, Eddie doesn't think anything of it. The little guy's cute and cuddly, and seems to always know when Eddie's having a bad time. Weird how the cat's never around when Buck is, though.
🔥let the world have its way with you by fleetinghearts/ @shitouttabuck (Post-Coma AU | 54K | Explicit): “It’s just that—I died,” Buck continues, voice unsteady enough that Eddie wonders if this is the first time he’s acknowledged that out loud. “I died, and there’s so much more. There’s so much more I want to do, things I don’t even know I want to do yet, and I almost had the chance to have and live them taken away. I don’t want to die and regret missing out on everything else, Eddie.” “So let’s make a list,” Eddie says. “Let’s do them.” or, a bucket list that’s really about buck needing to make a change and an eddie who’s ready to do anything to see him fall in love with life again. it takes some crossing off for eddie to realise—the thing at the top of the list in his own heart? it’s been right here all along
🔥like a dog with a bird at your door by fleetinghearts/ @shitouttabuck (Post-S6, Getting Together | 51K | Explicit): The kid with blood pouring down his shins is not so far from the dog lonely enough that he thinks breaking his housetraining is worth it for the ten minutes of berating that come with it, the ten minutes of undivided, if reluctant, attention. Buck thinks, sometimes, that at least he wasn’t the kind of puppy that gets put in a sack and drowned at birth. He wasn’t always unwanted. And he isn’t anymore. or, evan “i love you like a dog” buckley has only ever known how to love like, well, a dog, but maybe eddie diaz is the kinda guy to give a flea-bitten mongrel a forever home
🔥Something Dumb to Do by glorious_spoon/ @glorious-spoon (Post-S6, Getting Together | 8K | Explicit): "Too bad we can't just date each other." Eddie laughs. "What?" "No, I'm serious!" Buck sets his beer down, the better to gesture with both hands, face lighting up, and Eddie just—he really loves the guy, okay. Ridiculous as he is. "It would be so much easier! You wouldn't have to introduce a new person to Chris—he already likes me anyway—and you could tell Pepa so she'll stop setting you up on dates that don't go anywhere—" "And what would you get out of this?" Eddie asks, grinning. — Or: Buck and Eddie try something out together. (Part 1 of homeward bound)
🔥find a way to you (if it kills me) by foxwatson/ @eddiediazes (Post S6E13: Mixed Feelings, Pining | 19K | Mature): It’s something about the way Eddie phrases it. Something about the combination of his words and the way he’s staring down at the floor, and the flush in his cheeks and the way he’s fidgeting. Buck thinks, abruptly, he’s going to ask me on a date. “Well I - wanted to tell you first, and I need someone to watch Chris, anyways - I know he’s getting old enough now he doesn’t like feeling like he’s got a babysitter, so I was hoping - sorry. Not the point. Uh. I have a date on Saturday.” Just as abruptly as his own hopes had come soaring up above the cloud cover of his own unawareness - they go crashing back down to the floor - to the basement, and into the mud. “A date?” Buck rasps out. — the one where eddie decides to start dating again, buck figures out his own feelings just a minute too late, and then he spends a week going through the five stages of grief
🔥Being Eddie by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Time Travel, Post-S6, Getting Together | 80K | Teen): When Eddie starts seeing a new therapist, he’s presented with the opportunity to revisit several days from his past and right regrets that still bother him. OR: Eddie goes through the time travel therapy process of the 2009 Canadian TV show Being Erica.
🔥 Evan Buckley & The Coma-Verse of Madness by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Coma AU, Multiverse | 58K | Teen): After being struck by lightning on a call, Buck experiences a plethora of alternate realities showing him different directions his life could have taken. Fighting hard to get home, Buck learns what, or who, is important to him in every lifetime.
🔥 Both Blade and Branch by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S6 | 62K | Mature): The chances of being struck by lightning twice are incredibly minute, but Buck still manages to pull it off. During a double date with Marisol and Natalia, nonetheless. Eddie manages to resuscitate him, but as Buck recovers from yet another trauma, Eddie can’t help but notice there’s something very different about him. He’s not quite sure what version of Buck he got back.
🔥 where all of the people dancing and clapping would greet me with such warmth by trysetmeonfire/ @try-set-me-on-fire (Season 6, Magical Realism | 15K | Mature): In the fall, Buck begins to disappear. (or: Buck can see that people become transparent when they're about to die) (Part 2 of All I Am, All That I Am)
🔥 Ace of Hearts by glorious_spoon/ @glorious-spoon (Post-S6, Getting Together | 9K | Teen): "I've been wondering…" Maddie pauses, watches Buck make a face like he's bracing to be smacked. "What happened with Eddie? You two were dancing around it for so long, and then… what, it just didn't work out? Was the date really that bad?" She's expecting another wince, or even for him to duck out of the conversation entirely, but instead Buck is staring at her like she's grown a second head. "Maddie. I've never been on a date with Eddie." Or: the poker game was a date. It takes Buck a while to catch on, though.
🔥 situations, circumstances, miscommunications ( i just may like some explanations ) by heartbeatdiaz / @lonelychicago (Didn't Know They Were Dating | 4K | Teen): "You didn't know?" Eddie asks, calmer but not less confused. He frowns. "How could you not know?" "You never said anything?" Buck tilts his head to the side. "We were dating?” “I guess not,” Eddie sighs. His heart is beating a little faster, an unpleasant buzz beneath his skin as he all but chokes on a feeling he can’t quite name— it could be hurt or disappointment or maybe a mix of both. In that moment, he knows three things very clearly. 1. Buck is going to be the death of him. 2. He is in love with the most dense, most oblivious man on planet Earth. 3. He is too gay and, honestly, too old for this shit.
🔥listen to you breathing (is where I wanna be) by Yavilee/ @theladyyavilee (Presumed Dead | 41K | Teen): The thing is – and Eddie should have known this, has been taught this cruel lesson over and over and over again – the thing is most of the time the worst day of your life will start like just any other day. A million small moments, so familiar and mundane you almost don’t even notice them slipping by - until you would give anything to go back and get just one more. (You can’t.) — Or the one where Buck is presumed dead after a building collapse and Eddie has to live through the reminder that tomorrow isn't promised to anyone
🔥Eddie Diaz vs The Feelings by ElvenSorceress/ @elvensorceress (Season 6, Sexuality Crisis, Demisexual Eddie | 62K | Explicit): Eddie dives into the mysteries of attraction, romantic love, and asexuality because there's a good chance he's fallen in love with his best friend. AKA demisexual!Eddie figures out he’s demi and finds the happily ever after he’s been longing for
🔥tomorrow will always and forever now be today (tomorrow is our always and forever) by withmeornotatall/ @chronicowboy (Post-S6, Time Loop | 43K | Mature): "Think I can get a hug from my best man on my wedding day?" he asks, quietly hopeful in a way that makes Eddie want to tear off his skin. "Sure," Chris replies with a shrug, turning to throw Eddie a cheeky grin. "Dad, Buck needs a hug." Two things happen at once then: Eddie has to plaster on a smile authentic enough to convince the one person on this planet that knows him inside out—except he doesn't really have to fake his smile, not at first, because of number two—he sees groom-Buck for the first time. And groom-Buck is every bit as beautiful as Eddie might have imagined him over the years. For a moment, Eddie falls into the greatest betrayal his brain has ever laid out for him, imagining that he might have got to see Buck like this for the first time from the other end of the aisle— (OR: eddie gets trapped in a time loop on the day buck marries natalia)
🔥 Muscle Memory by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S6, Amnesia AU | 40K | Teen): After a disappointment in his personal life, Buck wakes up one morning to find everyone he loves has forgotten him completely. No memories. No recognition. Almost like he was never really there.
🔥 but i can see all along, love (it was you all the way down) by diazchristopher/ @captain-hen (Post-S6, Time Loop | 28K Mature): He puts his laptop away after a bit, and paces the length of his apartment as he tries to take stock of the situation at hand. One: The date is March 22nd, 2024. Two: It has been March 22nd for 3 days now. Three: Buck is trapped in some kind of time loop that is forcing him to relive this day. Four: Eddie is, apparently, in love with him. And. And. Five: Buck doesn’t feel the same way.
🔥 a blaze in the dark by woodchoc_magnum/ @woodchoc-magnum (Post-S6, Eddie Coming Out | 117K | Explicit): Set post-Season 6, where Buck has inadvertently sacrificed his friendship with Eddie in order to focus on his new relationship with Natalia, and is shocked when Eddie comes out to the team and subsequently reveals that he is dating a guy.
AUs
🔥Nothing Left But You by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars ("Blip" AU, Post-S4E13: Suspicion | 27K | Teen | Warning: MCD): In May of 2021, 25% of Earth's population suddenly disappears. Including Eddie. In May of 2026, they all come back. Eddie finds himself suddenly in the middle of a world he doesn't recognize, where the people he loves most have changed significantly.
🔥 Your Love is an Oil Slick (It Glows like Rainbows, It Stains My Soul) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Canon Divergent - Supernatural Elements, Ghost Buck | 67K | Explicit): When Eddie's son claims he has an imaginary friend, Eddie doesn't think much of it. Christopher is seven, it's what kids do. But then weird things start happening around the house, and Eddie starts dreaming about a handsome blue-eyed man. Turns out, Christopher's friend isn't so imaginary. Their house is haunted.
🔥like when the sun came out by spaceprincessem/ @spaceprincessem (Canon Divergent, Ghosts | 39K | Mature): He completely pulls the charger from the wall as he fumbles to put in his passcode. He doesn’t know who to call first. Everyone is busy, carrying on with their lives and Buck is stuck here in the loft with the terrifying ghost of his childhood like an omen. Out of the corner of his eye he catches the Crooked Smiled Man now standing in the dark entrance way to his bathroom. He swallows around the taste of blood in his mouth, hands shaking, useless as his list of contacts blur beneath the burn of tears. Eddie Eddie Eddie. He doesn’t know where the feeling comes from, but it’s sudden and sharp and excruciating. Eddie is the first name at the top of his list, his most recent calls and texts, and he doesn’t hesitate to hit the call button. [or buck can see ghosts au]
🔥All My Shattered Oaths by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Vampires AU | 107K | Explicit): Eddie wants to stay away from his family’s legacy and give his son a normal life. Buck’s desperate to find a way to get over the love he lost. Fate has other plans for both of them.
🔥 Further Than Blood (Or Than Bones) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Vampires AU | 50K | Explicit): Once, Eddie chose to save a newly turned against his better judgment. Five hundred years ago, Buck was saved by a rescuer he thought was a hallucination. Now they're together again and about to find out just how far either of them will go to try and deny what they are to each other.
🔥 let it pour out of your soul series by Rianne/ @rianneeyre (Magical Realism AU, Witch Eddie | 3 works | 71K | Complete):
collectively unconsciously composed (S4E6: Jinx | 46K | Explicit): Or: in which the author re-watched Buck Begins and Jinx and thought: what if this was gayer and had actual magic?
that systematic drug (PWP | 5K | Explicit): Eddie’s mouth goes dry when he opens the door and sees Buck. He’s clean-shaven and with his hair carefully styled back, smiling at Eddie sweetly and a little teasingly. Buck is wearing his dark jeans and his light blue v-neck polo shirt, the one that’s tight enough that it shows off the bulge of his biceps and the definition of his pecs and abs. Eddie knows this shirt. Buck's favourite, because he knows he looks good in it.
something binding us together (Established Buddie | 20K | Teen): Or: Eddie plans a long-avoided visit to his parents, discovers some things about his magic, and begins to build his family a home in LA's witching community.
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Put Up a Sign
I crave. I want. I hunger. My days and nights are filled with the thought of consumption. My empty heart simply needs to take and take and take, like a greedy thief. It is not enough that I feed it affection and attention and accomplishment. It must have more. It must have adoration, idolisation, absolute dominion over all others.
Simply being better than most is worthless. Simply being one of the chosen few is worth mockery. I must crawl up to the top amidst a mountain of the corpses of my rivals. And with each time their bones crunch underfoot, the hunger only grows.
It is not enough to be known, liked, 'popular'. Nor is it sufficient to be infamous, beloved, renowned. I must have armies prostate themselves before me, statues erected in glorious worship, my name scattered across the 7 winds. But the gales merely chill me to the bone, the statues just crumble to dust with time, and the armies go into my maw to feed my empty heart.
And what of power? Can I be satisfied with my little band of merry women and men, my precious clan tucked away in the depths of the forest? Of course not. Would an empire sooth the gurgling cries of a bottomless hunger? Could the world itself fill me up, or would it be but a speck in the endless pit of want?
They say Alexander wept, for he had no more worlds to conquer. I fear I am Alexander incarnate, thirsting after eternal war and an endless reign. I just with to be satisfied, satiated, sated; why must I be born with an empty heart, meant to take and take and take?
Were I a better man, I would carve that offending organ out and let myself wither away. Were I a worse one, I would gorge myself on power, and learn once and for all just how much I can consume. But I am me, and I sit upon a throne of my enemies' corpses, reigning over a little empire, nursing my hunger with little tidbits all the while.
I do not feel repentant. It is not in my nature, after all. Nonetheless, as my people give their harvests, their gold, their lives for me, I cannot help but feel a twinge of guilt.
Perhaps I shall put up a sign: "Please do not feed my empty heart. It will only want more."
This was a silly little writing exercise I did for funsies, but I loved how it turned out so y'all get to see it too!
Taglist: @coffeeangelinabox, @dorky-pals, @calliecwrites, @kaylinalexanderbooks, @shukei-jiwa
@thewingedbaron, @pluppsauthor, @cowboybrunch, @wylloblr, @possiblyeldritch
@tragedycoded, @finickyfelix, @urnumber1star, @ratedn, @ramwritblr
@vampirelover890, @possiblylisle, @illarian-rambling, @the-ellia-west, @differentnighttale
@evilgabe29, @glitched-dawn, @rivenantiqnerd, @dragonhoardesfandoms, @xenascribbles
@drchenquill, @everythingismadeofchaos, @owldwagitoutofyou, @dimitrakies, @beloveddawn-blog
@riveriafalll, @the-golden-comet, @rascaronii, @trippingpossum, @real-fragments
@unrepentantcheeseaddict, @the-inkwell-variable, @paeliae-occasionally, @an-indecisive-nerd, @thecomfywriter
@seastarblue
(Anyone else who wants to get added can tell me in the comments, pm me, or send me an ask about it!)
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sp-by-april · 2 days
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PC!Kyle x F!Reader [Part 2]
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[Part One] [Kyle Broflovski Master List]
I heard from Kyle two weeks later. Honestly, I was used to guys hitting me up immediately so I kind of wondered if he'd just forgotten about me. I was relieved when that wasn't the case.
He said he was having drinks with some of his friends and to meet him at the end of the night and he’d take me to his place. Kinda weird, but whatever. I really wanted to see him.
As I walked in, I saw him talking to a bunch of other old guys.
“She is pretty,” Kyle said.
“She’s hot,” Stan said with a grin, “I was gonna pick her up first, but I figured Kyle could use the fun,”
Kyle frowned, “Is that how you remember it going?”
An awkward smile slid over my face as I embedded myself with the group of men and made my presence known, “That’s pretty much how I remembered it,”
“Pretty girl!” the guys all said in unison as they lifted their assorted glasses towards me.
Kyle kissed my cheek and leaned over my ear with a smirk, “Sorry, they saw my phone,”
I nodded, reaching for the drink in his hand. Thankfully, he handed it over without a second thought.
I finished the liquor and listened intently as all the guys rushed to introduce themselves to me.
Tolkien was a cop. Clyde… I still don’t know what he actually does. Jimmy, was a comedian that I vaguely remembered my mother watching when I was a kid. Kenny, billionaire, needed no introduction but provided one all the same.
I felt more awkward and out of place than ever. I think Kyle realized it because he plucked the drink out of Stan’s hand and placed it in mine.
I was used to older guys vying for my attention so I knew how to navigate it. Older guys tend to like when I’m bolder, brasher, and more irreverent than their younger counterparts. These guys were a lot less intimidated by a woman with a mouth and I appreciated it. I was nervous but the whole thing went fine.
Kyle and I left first. I could hear the guys talking about how lucky he got before the door even closed behind us.
When we got to his place, I was slightly annoyed with having his friends sprung on me but I was horny enough to let it slide. At least, I would have let it slide if he let me.
He looked me up and down as he hung up his blazer and I tossed my purse and pink capelet jacket on his couch.
Kyle tilted his head as he watched me, “What’s bothering you?”
“Nothing,” I lied and approached with my sultriest walk.
“I get it,” A slight smile slid over his face as he reached out and cupped my cheek in the palm of his hand, “You’re closed off because behind the walls, you’re soft – But you don’t have to lie to me,”
I rolled my eyes,“Don’t psychoanalyze me,”
“I’d never,” He chuckled, “I don’t think you could afford it,”
I’d had enough.
“You can’t ignore me for weeks and then spring your friends on me,” I fumed, “And you definitely don’t get to treat me like a trophy after the fact – Like I’m some stupid girl who doesn’t know that some guy is just using her for sex,”
He squinted like he was trying to solve a difficult equation, “How can I be using you for sex if I’m ignoring you at the same time?”
Okay, that time I’d had enough.
“Have fun explaining to your friends how you let a girl like me get away,” I said and spun on my heels to leave.
“I wasn’t ignoring you,” He sighed as my hand reached for the doorknob, “And I wasn’t trying to ambush you – Okay, I was trying to ambush you, but for a good reason,”
I turned back to Kyle and crossed my arms, “There’s no good reasons to ambush people,”
“The guys I made those plans months ago and I’ve been swamped at work if you couldn't tell. I couldn’t cancel on them and I wanted to see you. Besides, I figured it would be a quick way to help you get to know me. Kind of like a crash course,”
“You want me to know you?” I asked and took a slow step towards him.
He smirked, “Yeah,”
I took another cautious step, “Why?”
He glanced away and rubbed the nape of his neck, “Because I want to know you,”
“You were really just busy with work?” I asked, walking the rest of the way to meet him.
He slid his palm over my cheek and I stood on my tiptoes to give him a kiss and he leaned in, but instead he brought his face to my neck. His other hand found my waist and his nose brushed against my earlobe as he inhaled my scent.
“Trust me, if it were up to me I would’ve had you in my bed every night,” He sighed, his hot breath washing over my skin, “You have no idea what you do to me. I haven’t been this fucking horny since high school,”
He kissed my neck and my fucking heart skipped a beat.
Then the hand on my waist slid over my ass and he pulled me up against him, “I can’t stop thinking about the way you move your hips,”
He finally pulled me into a kiss and I nearly swooned in his arms. I parted my lips and he pulled me into a deeper kiss, his tongue sliding right in my mouth.
His hand slid up my skirt, just to pull my panties down. He pushed my back against the wall and dropped to his knees.
He kissed my thigh as his fingers slid over my slit. I’m pretty sure I felt his breath hitch when he felt how wet I was. His fingers pushed inside and I almost gasped. I think it was the anticipation. I felt like I’d been waiting forever for him to touch me again. The way he moved his fingers felt like fucking magic.
He kissed my hip bone and his fingers curled to massage that sweet spot inside of me. I bit my lip, trying to stifle at least some moaning so I didn’t sound like some slut. I should have known better. Maybe he was right about me having walls.
Either way, he increased the pressure and speed. I felt like I was completely at his mercy. He buried his face against my hip, which pressed into him as his fingers brought me to my climax.
Or they would have if he hadn’t stopped just as I was about to hit my high.
I looked down at him and I swear that I meant to bitch, but instead I just whimpered.
He looked up at me and smirked, “You’re even prettier when when you’re needy,”
“I’m not needy,” I lazily protested.
“Hmm?” He licked a thick stripe over my clit and my entire body shuddered, “Really?”
I whined so loud that I was actually kind of mortified. Seeing the smug look of satisfaction on his face just made it worse.
He got on his feet and threw me over his shoulder. He carried me to his bed, my panties still down at my knees.
He dropped me on his bed and slowly slid my panties down over my ankles. I watched breathlessly as he pulled off his shirt and unbuttoned his pants. Then unzipped. Then stepped out of them.
He stroked himself over his boxer-briefs as he looked at me laid out on his bed. I could see every bit of how badly he wanted me. When he finally lost the underwear, I thought I was going to go insane just from the anticipation.
“I want to keep you,” He leaned over me and left a small kiss on my collarbone, “I’m gonna make you my wife,”
“...What?” My breath hitched and I had to replay the sentence in my mind at least three times to make sure that I heard him correctly.
“I promise I’ll take care of you,” He rubbed the head of his cock over my slit, picking up my desire for him, “And I’ll make you feel good,”
He kissed my neck and I cupped his cheeks and brought his face to mine. I had to look him in the eyes.
“You promise to take care of me?” I asked him just above a whisper.
“I’ll do more than that,” He groaned as he sank deep into me and I gasped as I felt him push my body to it’s limits.
He held still for just a moment, both of us relishing the initial feeling of him immersed in me, and finally experiencing what we’d both been craving for weeks.
I grabbed onto his shoulders and my eyes rolled back when his hips finally started to move.
“You can do anything you want to me,” I said thinly, struggling to speak and not just moan.
His eyes were glued to me as I moaned shamelessly. His hand palmed my breast and his thumb brushed over my nipple, eliciting a softer moan from me that seemed to enamor him. He pinched my nipple and gave it a light tug, drinking in every soft sound I made.
A small smirk slid over his face just before he locked his mouth onto mine. He picked up the pace, his rhythm getting more and more intense. I couldn’t believe how good he felt, his cock was indulging my sweet spot with every fucking stroke. My hands ran down his back, my freshly manicured nails dragging over his skin.
His hand slid down, held onto my hips as he pressed me into his mattress and kept me in place as he irresistibly pounded into me.
My back arched and as I did my best to resist the orgasm. I lost the fight. My body seized up, and all the bliss that had built up inside of me swelled to an unimaginable, incredible level. Everything was incredible with him. My nails dug into his skin, my back arched even more sharply. I moaned brazenly. My moans were quivering and embarrassingly loud. The sacred space in my core fastened up around him and I grasped him like I needed him to live. Like he meant everything to me. Like I was desperate for him. I think I was.
As I trembled underneath him, the visuals and sensations of my orgasm pushed him over the edge. He groaned low in his throat and his eyes rolled back as his hips bucked into me. He sealed his mouth back onto mine as he drove deep inside of me and his hips noticeably twitched. I moaned into our kiss as his cock pulsed intensely and pumped me full of hot, milky spurts. His tongue slid into my mouth as he finished spilling every bit of his seed glazing my cervix.
He panted over me and pet my hair as all the tension that had built up in his muscles melted off of him. He kissed me again and a sly smile slid over his face, “I’m keeping you for sure,”
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lady-phasma · 12 hours
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Could you IMAGINE Lestat’s reaction to the internet? Better yet, imagine his reaction to all the fan blogs that would inevitably pop up after his own interview is released after Daniel’s book is published. Lestat’s ego would be bigger than the moon LMAO. Somebody would have to hide ao3 from that man.
Hi anon! I saved this ask until I could take my time with it, but also so that the amazing and brilliant @aemondsbabe could help me. She and I have literally been having a similar conversation for months!
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In fact, I love this ask so much that I had to make a gif for it!
Since season two and the Rockstar promo we have been discussing this pretty frequently. One thing I think we can all agree on: Lestat's Twitter would be phenomenal and hilarious. I live for AMC to do a promo account just for the character.
Here's some headcanon we have about Lestat's internet use:
OF - Lestat 100% has an account. He might not use it for explicit acts, but he would love the "private" style of attention, knowing that he is captivating audiences via computers and phone and tablets in their homes.
Twitter/X - This account would be the rambling, unhinged shit we expect from him. Typos, Franglish, absurd comments because he misunderstood a pop culture reference. But most of all, he probably would direct most of his tweets to close friends and we'd get to see his tweets to Louis and about Armand. And the occasional interaction with fans or other celebrities when he figured out retweeting (which would result in the inevitable cancellation that he wouldn't care about at all).
Insta - We discussed this and at first I didn't think that he would have Insta at all. Then aemondsbabe suggested that he would have an account, but he would only post what his PR manager told him to post. I hope someone teaches him to take pictures of things other than shit in Walmart and candids of Louis.
Tumblr - aemondsbabe is a fucking genius! 100% credit where it is due. Lestat would have a Tumblr blog, but wouldn't quite understand that it's not a private diary. In fact, earlier this month during a discussion about this subject, she wrote a blog post for him:
louis, mon cher, how i wish you could be here with me on this, the most périlleuse des nuits… i have fallen prey to an evil poison, a foul spirit! the tour bus, you see, we had to stop to get l'essence ou, how you say, the gasoline… louis, mon cœur, i was tricked at this heinous shoppe! they had peculiar wares, des médicaments, promising virility of the gods! i have taken one and i fear this will end me, mon cher! please avenge me by slaying the most wicked of men known as Daryl! he has taken up résidence at l'Exxon outside of Tampa!
I laughed until I cried! Brilliant!
AO3 - I really don't know that he would find AO3 on his own. I think someone (maybe Graham Norton) would show it to him at some point and then he would speed read everything he could and write a "private" entry about the fics on his Tumblr diary. That would be something to read!
Thank you for this ask, anon! This was so much fun!
I hope AMC goes all out with Lestat on social media the way they gave Daniel his own LinkedIn page. I need him to have a twitter at the very least, but they could so much more.
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cemeteryvalentine · 20 hours
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astro observations part 4 !!! ^____^
(specifically based off my family :3 pleaseee don't get offended at anything that doesn't resonate)
🗝️: one thing about a sag placement, they are gonna hang up FIRST !!! i swear, if anyone misses flip phones, it's a sag placement/dominant. i just know they miss snapping that phone shut in a petty manner LOL. my mom is a sag moon AND rising, and she'd call me and demand me to do something in such a bitchy tone and then hang up on me like girl who tf do u think u areee 😭😭😭😭 LMFAO. but honestly good for her, i love being petty like her.
like i swear i take after my mom because everytime she does that annoying hang up before i can respond thing, i call her again just to say a snarky remark, and hang up on her back!
🐇: i swear, virgo placements have no problem being the grossest people alive, but suddenly it's a problem when someone else does it :/// it's really annoying. my brother has a pigsty of a bedroom, doesn't wash his hand when he pisses unless i make him, and leaves his trash everywhere, but constantly gets on my sister for the same things 😭. like the calls coming from inside the house !!! i think basically, (some) virgos are like picky(?) with what areas they'd want clean. like they're only really comfortable with THEIR mess and no one else's.
🗝️: i love how pisces mercury communicate because it's like what the hel are u awn about 😭 in the NICEST way though :3 they're so kewl and interesting to talk to, plus they're so nice and understanding. maybe because they're water mercuries after all. speaking of, my favorite artist ever kurt cobain was a pisces mercury and it SHOWSSS. a lot of nirvana lyrics feel artistic and metaphoric, or just realllyyyy silly. liiike "angel left wing, right wing, broken wing. lack of iron and or sleeping" from milk it, one of my nirvana faves. and "i vomit C*M and DIARRHEA". like girl whatever that means !!!! (song, mexican seafood)
🐇: mars influence on the asc makes for prominent features. especially eyebrows. my brother has an aries rising and he has such a bad case of RBF. i swear he never looks happy 😭 his virgo sun and cap moon definitely don't help at all either. then im a mars rising and i have big eyebrows like my brother. like we're the only ones with big eyebrows, while our parents brows look invisible LOL. also i'm a virgo rising !! and ppl are always saying i look mad which honestly pisses me off :P so in conclusion, mars influence + virgo placements = major rbf
🗝️: i HATE to add on to the cancer hate train since i'm one myself and i loveee being one + we get soo much hate, but i feel a (unevolvled) cancer makes for the worst pick me girl ever !!!! this def doesn't apply to all cancers, but the few cancer women i know can be so mean to other women so unprovoked. especially my mom, it gives me the ick when she calls random women b*tches or makes fun of them to me for their features or success or soemthing. i used to be a pick me too up until i was like 13 (im soooo happy i grew out of that mess QUICK!). i would constantly strive for male attention, it was embarrassing 😭. ik another girl who values her shitty boyfriend over her (girl) friends and i haaate it. like ive only known a few cancer women, but a lot of them are like the meanest pick me bitch ever, or such a sweeet, caring soul :). i feel like being a pick me stems from cancers being feminine AND traditional. yk? i pray i make sense, but yk how it's traditional for girls to be perfect for her man, and value him no matter the circumstance ?? and cancer/moon being **traditional** ? yeahhh 😭
anywayzzz that's all :3 tyyy for reading !! i had sm making a new observations, considering it's been a year since my last LMFAOO. and again, if it doesn't apply, let it fly. ty bye ^__^
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hockeytwittereats · 2 days
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It's funny because I think Taylor had drawn and redrawn her boundaries with fans a bunch of times and her boundaries are pretty aligned with what would be popular with people her age at the time and fans just don't accept them anymore.
When she was a teen, she did almost curate a parasocial relationship with her fans. However, that seems to be pretty normal/predictable for a teenager who became famous. She did build that relationship, but when things were getting to be too much, she figured out how to take some of it back. Not in a "I hate you" way, but in a "I need my space too" way.
She doesn't really post personal things online anymore and it seems like home is almost always off limits. It seems like her current line is "personal life vs. work life". Travis is on her IG, but at her job. The random TikTok from the SB after party was in a public space so not encroaching on her private spaces. Outside of a YouTube short, there is really nothing personal shared from private spaces.
Her pushback on the interviewer for the POTY interview about her current relationship being public is important: she does not view showing up and supporting someone you love as sharing something private (and she is right). She doesn't post things from games, the most we see is of her with other players partners. She is there in a private capacity, but she is one of the biggest stars on the planet so it will draw attention.
But it seems like some fans have not realized these are her boundaries. Her personal life is still really private. I think the extent of not known things about them that has been shared is...they watch Monday Night Football together (and that was a fairly safe assumption to make based on Travis's job and the fact he has a football podcast). Like, we don't know a lot about what happens behind closed doors (and in fact have seen less of them in a private setting even if that is not pictures of them, but of their spaces) since they got together. Truly drawing a line around things. It's how to protect your space and give yourself peace without cutting an arm off.
In short: Taylor did share a lot or open herself up a lot when she was younger. And as someone 3.5 years younger than her, she was behaving normal for the time. Now she has shifted her boundaries and also kind just uses SM in a very age-normal way and some people still hold 16 year old Taylor up as the way she must always be.
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adastra121 · 2 days
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Doran the Doomed Harbinger
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I redesigned the travelling mage from my Touchstarved Unnamed MC’s backstory!
Pronouns: He/They Birthday: December 21 Height: 173 cm (5’8) Personality: Troublesome Contrarian Likes: Dancing, poetry, sweets, really bad erotica (the cringier the better), puzzles, animals that tend to disgust or frighten people Dislikes: Coconut, dogs (he has severe cynophobia from their traumatic experience with a hellhound), rules, boredom, tight clothing Fatal flaw: Lacks a sense of self which makes them turn to external influences for direction Other: Enjoys his tea with a startling amount of sugar. So yeah, they drink slightly tea-flavoured sugar every morning. With the occasional splash of milk. Quote: “We are vessels of unimaginable power, made to be forever contained — molded — into whatever the world says we should be…haven’t you ever wished to let go?”
More about them below:
Doran was a magic prodigy, born gifted and powerful and unfortunately for them, that caught the Senobium’s attention.
When Doran was young, he was attacked by a hellhound. He used his magic intending to kill it, but being an untrained magical powerhouse, he ended up absorbing the creature’s heart instead.
Now they’re a walking bomb. A roaring firestorm lives inside of them and they are being burned alive every waking moment. They keep it under wraps with their magic. They’ve become so practised with restraining the hellfire inside of him that it’s become as natural as breathing to them. He does it subconsciously. Unconsciously.
For most of his life, he had trained under the Senobium to be their perfect mage. He did anything they asked of him, even if the tasks they gave him were dangerous or cruel. He took pride in them, even found humour in the cruelty where most others would only find horror. But he understood, even as a child, that the Senobium was in control — although he played the part of their puppet well, if he ever stepped out of line, they would destroy him.
With the hellfire burning inside them and the Senobium’s control, all they’ve ever known is restraint. Eventually, they had enough of the Senobium’s influence over their life and fled Eridia.
For a while, he travelled around the world, searching for a new purpose after leaving the Senobium. He worked as a magic mercenary, providing magical assistance to anyone that paid — sometimes to those who didn’t, if the mood struck.
He tries their hand at being a hero for a while due to being bored. They’ve never felt the automatic urge to be heroic out of the goodness of their heart, but after leaving the Senobium, he didn’t really have much else to do, and they couldn’t find a good reason not to.
His moral code is whatever they find more interesting at the moment.
“I don’t understand. Why would you risk your life for a bunch of strangers?” *shrug* “Why not?”
Also, villain types are genuinely so much more fun to piss off. Because you get the sense that they’ve already passed the point of no return, and once you pass that certain threshold, you lose much of your restraint. And that makes for interesting adversaries and interesting fights.
…You can kind of see how they wound up half-dead when Luneth found them.
Luneth views them as a mess of contradictions. They are as sincere as they are mysterious. As considerate as they are selfish. As kind as they are cruel. Nihilistic as optimistic. With an open heart and innumerable secrets behind their smile. The one thing about them that makes sense? They are lost. And they are wandering the world, searching for their destiny, even as they claim they don’t believe in it.
Doran is a curious spirit. He loves to question everything. Especially if it results in annoying someone.
They enjoy and collect puzzle toys. They especially like the puzzle boxes which you need to solve in order to open. They gifted one of their favourites to Luneth during their time together.
You know the manic pixie dream girl trope? He’s a manic demon nightmare guy — I don’t know how else to describe a character who self-ascribes the role of the inciting incident for someone else’s journey of growth and decides to incite the incident by any means necessary.
They have a soft spot for “creepy” or “scary” animals like bats, rats, snakes, spiders, bugs, and deep-sea marine animals. Barreleye fish, my beloved.
They wandered without purpose for most of their life. They found their purpose in Luneth. He sees themself in her, but more than that, he sees her potential to be greater than him, than her temple, fate, destiny, all of it. They finally understand faith for having known her. 
Zodiac sign is Sagittarius
MBTI type is ENTP
Enneagram is 5w4
Like Luneth, this character was inspired by a song I was listening to. Doran’s is “Arsonist’s Lullaby” by Hozier.
I think another character theme of theirs could be “Dance Monkey” by Tones and I.
And here's their full character redesign!
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hugejk · 12 hours
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2 years
pablo gavi x singer!yn
cw: mentions of drug usage, smoking, drinking, addiction.
quick a/n: sorry i’ve been VERY inactive lately, i do want to write more so i’ll accept any footballer reqs!!! :-)
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“it’s been 2 years since we’ve seen or heard from y/n, where could she be? Most people assume she decided to quit making music, some assume she gained too much weight and is too ashamed to step out in public. But i guess we won’t know for a long time now, leave a comment below on what you think about this.”
you sigh and put down your phone. It’s been 2 years since you’ve even been in the studio at all. A 2 year hiatus from the world. Flashbacks start to play in your head on how you even ended up here.
. . .
sitting out on the edge of balcony watching all the glowing stars surrounded by the darkness of the night. You life was a mess. Parties every other night, surrounded by people who didn’t care if they ruined their life. Taking random drugs whenever you could. Drinking most of the day. The joint inbetween your fingers burning into ash. You couldn’t stand it anymore.
You were just tired of everything, and the comments on every little thing you did made everything more worse.
“maybe y/n should take a break from all the parties..”
“look at her eyes, they look dead.”
“she’s just a drug addicted psychopath. Hope she stops soon and gets some treatment.”
you were tired of all eyes on you. Biting the inside of your bottom lip, the tears started to accumulate in your eyes. Taking a big hit of the joint, feeling the burn but not feeling anything anymore. You knew there was only one way to stop getting so much attention.
Putting out the joint and heading into your apartment and opening up your laptop. You log into the device and search for flights to Barcelona. Little did you know, this small decision would change your life forever.
you didn’t tell anyone about this. You packed your bags, reset your phone, and went to bed. The next morning you had ordered and uber. Covering your face with a hat, mask, and sunglasses. You didn’t want the spotlight anymore. It took a good 30 minutes to get to the nearest airport. You wonder if anyone will even care if you disappeared, stopped making music, stopped replying to texts, stopped calling, stopped everything.
you didn’t want to live the life you had anymore. what you once thought was a blessed now had transformed into a curse right in front of your eyes. Becoming something far more evil than you thought. You remember a little y/n looking up to famous singers, wanting what they wanted. Wanting the light, wanting the eyes, wanting what they had.
but now that you had finally grasped it after years of putting everything into it, it felt like a living hell. You look up from your lap, and you were at the airport. The driver looking back at you to let you know that you had arrived, taking out your wallet fast and tipping him 15 bucks, you scurried out the black SUV, grabbing your bags from the back and trying to avoid eye contact with anyone.
A new start. You walked into the front doors of the airport, not ready to start the tedious process just to get checked in. You sighed and headed straight for check in. You just wanted to get it done and over with, but unfortunately you were in america and going to another country. They needed to identify who you were.
“trip to barcelona? can i see a passport please?”
the blonde headed lady behind the counter asked, you handed her the passport and leaned in to whisper into her ear,
“you didn’t see me here.”
as you lifted the glasses and took down the mask, a serious look on your face. You could see her eyes light up as she saw the world’s most known singer standing in front of her. But she obliged to your words and wished you a good flight as she handed the passport back.
after the whole process was over, you sat in those uncomfortable waiting seats in your terminal. Tapping your finger on your already shaking leg. You didn’t have a plan for barcelona. Fuck. Do you go seek professional help like all the comments had said? Do you stop making music? Do you take the time to heal and finally find yourself? Your mind running at a pace you couldn’t keep up with. You took a deep breath.
After a few hours of waiting they finally started calling for your flight. You couldn’t even feel nervous or excited, you were just so numb on the inside, dissociated from the world you stand on. time was flying by, one second you were waiting to be called, the next second you were in your seat, and in the blink of an eye…you were in barcelona.
Stepping off the plane, going through another tedious journey just to hit the streets of barcelona—and cry. You didn’t know what the fuck you were doing in that city. You had no house, barely enough money to hold you over for a few nights, because when you packed you thought it would be smart to only pack a little bit of your funds. Fuck. You had nothing and nobody.
Walking around the streets like a lost child, luckily for you, you knew spanish, most of it. Your mom’s side was hispanic. So from a young age she made it her duty to teach you. Thanks mom.
you manage to find a hotel, you walk in puffy eyed. Thank god for those glasses.
“do you have any available rooms?..”
you said silently, the poor lady who was working that night nodded. it looked like she needed a break more than you did. she asked for how many nights,
“uhm…just like…just a few nights.”
“im gonna need an exact number honey this hotel is going to be booked by fc barcelona soon. we need all the rooms we can take.”
you knew some stuff about football, when you were younger you would watch matches with your dad. You were even on your towns small team, hoping one day you could make it big. Other things got in the way of that.
“uhm..just 3 nights is good..”
“that’s better, that’ll be about 400. do you want room service?”
“no thank you.”
she nodded, as you handed her your card, she charged it and slid you your key. Now you were on your own. you had taken your sim card out your phone so nobody could contact you. But now you were staring to regret it. You sat on the edge of the hotel bed. You knew you had to take some time to reset, it started now.
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a/n: plsplsplspls let me know if i should make a part 2, this was kinda just like a starting point, also inbox is very very VERY open for ideas ;-) also this is a little bit darker than what i usually write, but for what i have in mind it does get fluffier the more it goes on.
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wo-mary · 2 days
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Letter from the Abyss
«Oh, Louis.
How many years have passed since you killed me? How many years have passed since the poison coursed through my veins while you gazed at me with loving yet distant eyes, unaware of what you were doing? How many years since you embraced me from behind while I sat with my throat slit, drowning in my own blood? How many years since your heart shattered from killing the one you loved?
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I was slowly and agonizingly dying an impossible vampire death. Every cell of my body, every fragment of my soul, was pierced by unbearable pain. And all I could feel was how I sank into your strong arms, descending into the inescapable darkness. At least, I was grateful that it was you who did it, and not someone else.
Did you at least believe that I loved you, mon cher?
You didn’t think I was perfect, but you felt that I was a lot. But I couldn't help my love, and from the lack of yours, I made sure we both drowned in my bottomless, soul-crushing love together.
You didn’t think I was sane and saw me as a bloodthirsty, unbalanced killer. But that was my language of love — hysteria, tears, abuse, demands, and keeping you in an iron grip. Every time you tried to get close to someone else, I nearly turned myself inside out. I wanted to vomit. I wanted to destroy everything around me. So I destroyed everything around you.
You didn’t think we were meant for each other, but I saw in our impossible love the most sincere and genuine thing. Yes, it was built on your suffering, on your immense black void, which gradually consumed me too.
You didn’t believe I was faithful to you, and only saw my betrayals. But they weren’t infidelities; they were weak, miserable attempts to get your attention, to stir strong feelings in you, to make you love me as much as I loved you.
I tried to be gentle and tender. But you didn’t respond, and every time, I chose my demons to show my love for you, Louis.
I tried to speak openly, but you didn’t listen, so I committed all sorts of foolish acts just to reach your heart.
Oh God, how I loved you, Louis de Pointe du Lac. I loved you so much, mon cher, that I became cruel. To you. To myself. To the world. I was a raw, exposed nerve, capable only of erupting with emotions and suffering. And when you were killing me, I thought — yes, God, yes, I’ll stop feeling this. He will end my life, and there will be no more love. He will end my life, and there will be no more suffering. He will end my life, slit my throat, poison me, burn me in the furnace… the same one where I burned the useless human bodies that meant nothing to me…
But you didn’t finish your mission. I remained in pain. In suffering. With a soul shattered into pieces. Fully united with my own black hole, the one I so desperately tried to escape by making you my lover, by making you fall in love with me, by loving you all my life.
I was left alone with an impossible, imperfect love for you. Left without you. Oh, Louis, you can’t imagine how immense this pain was. It cannot be measured by instruments, by years, by the depth of a soul. It cannot be compared to anything. But it can be felt. And, you know, maybe if you had known back then that I hadn’t completely died, you would have thought that I was preparing to kill you too, to give you that same unbearable pain, and you’d be right. But while I was dying and regenerating at the same time, I faced unbearable despair and gave up. I stopped fighting. Stopped struggling with you. Stopped making plans against you. I just broke apart and let that despair swallow me to the very depths.
Oh, Louis. How many years have passed? And only now are you reading this letter. And if you’re looking for a reason why I did this, then read the letter again. Then again and again. And understand that I’m still slowly dying. I’m still alone with this impossible love for you, mon cher.
And maybe, with a small part of my soul, I still wish you would finish killing me. Because I can’t do this anymore.
Forever yours, relentless and unbearable, Lestat de Lioncourt»
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celli-ohs · 3 days
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hubba hubba!
part two of accidentally in love! series frat boy!yeonjun x stubborn!reader; college!au, one-sided love to lovers! comedy/crack, fluff, angst, smut
ATTENTION: reply/comment for taglist!
6. sex candle (written chapter 2k)
It’s almost routine, Yeonjun thinks as he lights the vanilla-scented candle in the kitchen. The laundry is in the basket, the bathroom is wiped down and smells of roses, the couch is clean pillows fluffed, and an old episode of Community is playing on the TV. Everything was perfect. “Oh god, are you inviting a girl over?” Beomgyu’s crass tone ruins the moment. Yeonjun cocks a brow at him, looking annoyed. “I mean you’ve got your stupid sex candle out and the bathroom smells like a garden.” The younger one points. “Y/n is coming over,” Yeonjun explains. “You’ve got her into your trap already? The poor girl has only known you for three days!” Yeonjun shakes his head. “No, she’s coming over for our assignment. And I’m trying to make our place comfortable for her.” 
Beomgyu sighed and flopped onto the couch. “Hey! I just cleaned that, aren’t you going out?” Yeonjun asks, fixing the pillows again. “I was, but Jeongin had to cancel. So I’m gonna hang here.” Beomgyu says as he switches from Netflix to Hulu. Yeonjun grimaces. Of course, with his luck, Beomgyu would be here. “Hey, is she here yet? I’m kinda hungry.” Kai asks as he emerges from his room. As Yeonjun shakes his head, the youngest of the three roommates dives into the fridge, emerging with string cheese. “Why’re you lighting your sex candle?” Kai nods to the counter, and Beomgyu laughs. “Told you!” Yeonjun bites back an insult when there’s a knock at the front door. He races to the door, knocking Beomgyu who’d gotten up, back into his seat.
Yeonjun swiftly swings open the door and flashes his trademark smile. “Hey, welcome,” He greets you. You look up at him, eyes wide and lips so kissable. Yeonjun felt his heartbeat begin to speed up. “Hey. I brought fabric and food.” You lift up both arms, each one a grocery bag hangs from. “Food?!” Beomgyu sticks his head through the door frame and for the first time since you two have met, Yeonjun sees you smile. “Beomgyu! Hey!” You walk in as Yeonjun steps to the side. “I didn’t know you’d be home, are you our model?” You talk to Beomgyu as if you two were old friends. “Nah, that’s Kai, but what’d you bring?” He refers to the bag of food you’d picked up on your way here. “Fried chicken,” You walk over to the kitchen counter and place the bag down. 
“Woah,” You grimace. “That candle is strong.” Yeonjun closes the front door and skips over to you. “It’s vanilla,” He smiles. “Yeah, I can tell, I’m not a big fan of vanilla, sorry.” You look more disgusted than interested. (Yeonjun immediately blows the candle out). “Hi Y/n!” Kai waves at you from the little dining table. “Hey Kai, thanks for agreeing to model,” You give the youngest a side hug, which he happily accepts. “No problem! Thanks for the chicken,” he chimes. “You okay if we eat first Yeonjun?” You finally address him, your partner. “Yeah, no worries, I’m kinda hungry anyway.” He mutters. He had no idea you were so close with his friends. He watches from the counter as you make a plate for Kai, and then Beomgyu, chatting with them like you’ve known them your whole life. 
Then suddenly you hand him a plate. “Huh?” He blinks, so lost in thought he hadn’t heard a word you’d said. “Your food? I wasn’t sure what you liked, so I kinda gave you a bit of everything.” You respond, and suddenly Yeonjun’s heart bursts. If there’s one way to get Yeonjun to fall madly in love, it's food. (As if he wasn’t already in love with you.) “Thank you so much,” He smiles shyly, taking the plate giddily back to the table. “God you’re so weird.” Beomgyu pretends to vomit, earning a glare from Yeonjun. You finally make your own plate and sit between Yeonjun and Kai, and everyone digs in. “So,” Yeonjun finally asks after a few bites. “You guys all know each other?” He tries not to act suspiciously. You nod, swallowing your food. “Heeseung taught Y/n how to play League, so sometimes she joins us,” Beomgyu answers. 
“Sometimes as in once every three months,” You scoff. “Kai and I sometimes hang out during parties.” You nod to the youngest one, who is busy eating to his heart’s content. He can't believe that there were so many opportunities the two of you could have met sooner. (He has an inkling of a feeling Beomgyu has been gatekeeping you from him.) “Oh, cool,” He tries his best to not sound agitated. After everyone finishes their food, Beomgyu offers to wash the dishes so you and Yeonjun can begin working. “I’ll take Kai’s measurements if you want to go over the fabrics I chose.” You say, taking out your measuring tape from your bag. Yeonjun does as he’s told, overlooking the various cuts of fabric you’d stuff into the grocery bag. He’s so busy trying to figure out which would work best he doesn’t realize you and Kai are giggling in the living room. 
“Okay seriously, stop laughing, I have to do this correctly.” You warn Kai, though the smile on your face says otherwise. “Sorry, you just make this weird face when you concentrate.” He hums. You roll your eyes and jot down Kai’s waist before going behind him and measuring his shoulders. “Woah,” You suddenly stop. “What’s up?” Both of the men in the room look at you curiously. “Kai, you’ve got a really nice physique.” You suddenly compliment and Kai’s ears begin to burn red. “O-Oh thank you-” “Your shoulders are so broad, and your biceps.” You suddenly lift his arm up, forcing him to flex as you admire his body. “Have you ever considered modeling? Like legit?” Kai’s whole face is red now, and he can’t seem to keep eye contact with you. 
“No,” He whispers, shaking his head. “Well, you should.” You tell him, finally stepping back and scribbling the last of Kai’s measurements. Yeonjun steals your attention by clearing his throat. “Can I get your opinion on this Y/n?” He asks. “Just do whatever you think is best.” You tell him, walking over. “Well, I still want your opinion, this is your project too.” He teases. “I’m stuck between these two, which do you think leaves more of an impression?” He refers to the two fabrics, one Oxford cloth, and the other pinpoint. As you’re busy silently contemplating, Yeonjun realizes how much he enjoys your expressions. The pout on your lips as you're deep in thought, the way your brows furrow together. He can tell your brain is moving at 100 miles per hour.
“What if we used both? The colors compliment each other, and there’s something I’ve been wanting to try,” You sound unsure as you dig around your bag, pulling out a sketchbook. “I’m not that good at drawing like you, but hopefully you get the idea.” You flip to a certain page, pointing out a sketch. It’s a rough one, Yeonjun will admit, but he can clearly see what you mean. “I think the contrast in material and color will work nicely, plus it’d work well with your faux corset design.” You add. “This is great! I love it!” Yeonjun grins widely at you, not able to hide his happiness. He notices the tinge of pink on your cheeks as you smile shyly. “Thanks,” You mutter, turning away to hide your face. “We should start with the template,” You clear your throat. Yeonjun only chuckles, finding your shyness adorable.
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“What do you think?” You ask as you and Yeonjun stand side by side across the living room as Kai stiffly models for the both of you. “Well for starters, Kai you’ll never book a gig if you don’t have some fluidity.” He pokes fun. You giggle as Kai slumps. “But I really like it, I think maybe we drop the line here deeper though, to create that illusion of a cinched waist.” Yeonjun walks up and points out the problem area to you. “Right, I think I also want to make the placket one whole color and not blend into the design, so it breaks up the shape.” You also walk over, picking at the shirt. “Other than that I don’t have any complaints.” You and Yeonjun agree. “What do you think Kai?” Yeonjun asks. The boy looks at the mirror (Yeonjun had brought it out from his room) and inspects himself. “I like it.” He says simply. 
“Good.” You hum, collapsing on the couch. Beomgyu re-emerges from his room, after having disappeared for the past five hours after washing the dishes. “Finished? Good. I wanna watch TV.” He lightly shoves you to the side. You roll your eyes, before getting up again to begin cleaning up. “I can revise the design and send it to you later, did you want to borrow my sewing machine?” Yeonjun offers you. You glance at the machine on the dining table. It’s a bit older but it got the job done just fine. “I just thought since I can’t sew, you’d want to keep it for now.” He says as Kai gently folds the shirt up. “Yeah, if you’re okay with that.” You nod. “I don’t mind at all.” Yeonjun sends you a soft smile that has your stomach twisting, but you blame your hunger instead.
There’s a knock at the door and Kai goes to open it as you and Yeonjun finish cleaning up. “Oh hi Heeseung,” The mention of your friend’s name has you sitting up. “Hi, is Y/n here?” He asks, and you can see his head peeking in. “Here!” You stand up, just as Kai lets him in. “Hey, man,” Beomgyu smirks. The two were probably just playing a round of League before this. “Heeseung, hey. What’re you doing here?” Yeonjun gives a wave. You don’t notice the uneasiness in his eyes. “Just picking up Y/n again,” He laughs awkwardly. “Seung dropped me off,” You explain, picking up the heavy sewing machine. As if automatic, Yeonjun grabs the other handle with his free hand. “I got it, finish packing your stuff.” He assures you. 
You give him a grateful smile before letting go to add the rest of your stuff into your bag. “Did you see Jeongin’s message?” Beomgyu and Heeseung are already in deep conversation as you double-check all your items. “All packed up?” Heeseung finally asks. “Yeah, I’m ready.” You tell him, throwing your bag over your shoulder. “Here Yeonjun, I can-” “I got it.” Yeonjun swings the sewing machine away from Heeseung’s hand. The air feels stiff. “Uh, let me know if you need me to try on the shirt again later,” Kai awkwardly clears his throat. “Yeah, yeah I will.” You give him a pained smile, stepping out first. “See you Heeseung Y/n,” Beomgyu waves goodbye. “I’ll walk you two out,” Yeonjun decides, following you both down the stairs with the sewing machine. 
The walk to the car is silent, and not the good kind. When you three reach Heeseung’s beat-up Honda Civic, he pops the trunk for Yeonjun to load the machine. “Thanks,” Yeonjun only shakes his head. You three stand there uncomfortably, waiting for someone to say something, anything. “How are the plans for rush?” Heeseung tries to start a conversation. “Oh, they’re going good. There’s gonna be a huge rager Saturday night,” Yeonjun suddenly turns to you. “You’ll be there, right?” You blink, not expecting the conversation to be turned to you. His eyes are intense as he stares as if he is trying hard to read your mind. “Uh- Yeah, I will.” You nod, not knowing how to respond to the attention. “Good. I’ll see you there then,” Yeonjun looks pleased with himself, walking slowly backward back to his apartment.
As you and Heeseung get into the car, you finally let out a breath of relief, one you had no idea you were hiding. Heeseung immediately giggles, hiding his grin behind his hands like a schoolgirl. Your response is to glare, but that doesn’t scare your roommate. “You like him! And he likes you!” He squeals, and you have to physically stop yourself from slapping that smile off his face. “Can we just go home, I’m starving,” You sigh, turning away. “Okay, okay,” Heeseung’s giggles finally subside. “But let me tell the others real quick-” Heeseung never got to send that message, because the next thing he knew you’d lunged at him.
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Bonus:
Y/n doesn't drive, so Heeseung is her personal chauffeur (she forces him)
Jollibee chicken is the best change my mind you can't
Every time Yeonjun has a girl over he lights the vanilla bean candle from bath and body works
All the workers know him as the vanilla bean guy
Beomgyu was supposed to hang out with Jeongin, who was going to introduce him to his famous friends (more on that in Beomgyu's series hehe)
Yeonjun was definitely not jealous that Y/n said Kai had a nice body, and he definitely did not go to the gym and disobey the doctor's orders
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hubba hubba! masterlist
taglist (open): @justandloyal2961 @hoonatic
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pascaloverx · 3 days
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Sweet Love
Summary: You're an up-and-coming writer, congratulations. To protect your beloved job, you're willing to do anything. Even strike a deal with the devil, better known as your sister's neighbor. You and Dean Winchester don't really see eye to eye, but in a moment of desperation, you agree to collaborate with him for a greater good.
Author's Notes: Many characters do not belong to me but to the Supernatural Universe (2005-2020). I hope you enjoy the fanfic's story. The fanfic will contain strong language and adult content. Dear readers, I'm here to let you know that if you enjoy this fic, please engage with it. Comments and likes are welcome. I appreciate everyone who follows this fanfic. Anyway, enjoy this chapter.
chapter nine
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FINAL CHAPTER
The alarm rings, waking you up. It’s not even eight in the morning yet, but you need to adjust to your new life. You and Dean Winchester have been dating for almost two years, which is quite a while. You’re still neighbors, actually, and ever since your relationship changed drastically, he’s been trying to marry you. But all of this happened because, during a night of reconciliation, you both forgot to use protection, and nine months later, you gave birth to a baby. You had your moment of panic when you found out you were going to have a child with Dean.
You get out of bed, hearing your son crying from his room. "Bobby, mommy's coming to get you," you mumble as you quickly get up to grab your son. As soon as you reach his room and approach his crib, he stops crying.
"Who’s the most beautiful baby in the world?" you ask as you pick up your son and gently rock him. He’s too distracted trying to chew on your hair to pay attention to anything you say. Suddenly, the doorbell rings, making your son fidget excitedly. You rush to open the door.
"I knew my little boy would be awake." Bobby smiles when he sees his father at the door. Dean takes the baby in his arms and gives him a hug.
"Can you stay with him while I get ready? I don't want to make us late." You speak between yawns, while Dean nods, playing with little Bobby's hands, who is having a great time in his father's arms. You start picking out the right outfit for the occasion. Sam proposed to your sister, and today is the celebratory lunch for the newly engaged couple.
"Don't you find it odd that our siblings are getting married before us, even though we've already built a new life together?" Dean asks as he watches you from the door of your room. You look at him seriously. He knows you avoid discussing marriage. Having Bob was unexpected and unplanned. You want your marriage to be about something more than just that. Dean, on the other hand, wants to marry to provide a family for your son.
"We rushed the relationship process. They’re following the right flow. What’s really strange is that you’ve already slept with me and with your future sister-in-law. Do you think I should wear this red dress or this black dress?" you ask, showing Dean the options. He examines the dresses for a moment, while Bobby also looks at you with a sleepy expression.
"I prefer the black one; it will highlight your curves better. By the way, I like how things worked out for us. We didn’t plan to have Bobby so soon, but eventually, we would have had a child, right?" Dean starts rocking Bobby in his arms, resting the baby’s head against his chest. Bobby snuggles so comfortably in Dean’s arms, it melts your heart. You grab your clothes and toiletries to head to the bathroom for a shower. However, your silence about Dean’s question clearly bothers him.
"I don’t know, darling. You work so much with your investigations and the reports you publish, and when I release a book, I spend more time on tour signing it than at home. Without Bobby, we probably…" You realize you’re about to say something regrettable, but it’s already too late. You didn’t want to imply that you wouldn’t see a future with Dean if you didn’t have your baby, but that’s exactly what you ended up saying.
"So, from what I understand, we’re not going to get married because we had a child, and the only reason we’re together is because we’re parents of the same baby?" Dean says, visibly irritated, and you can tell from his furious expression that even the fact that Bobby is sleeping in his arms hasn’t calmed him down.
"I know what I said might have sounded that way, but that’s not what I meant. I just wanted to say that no one knows what our future would be like if our child hadn’t been born. But eventually, we will get married. It’s just that as long as I feel like you want to marry me because Bobby needs married parents, I won’t agree to marry you." At that moment, you feel as if you can’t quite express yourself properly. The father of your child seems to be getting more stressed. You drop the outfit you were planning to wear for your sister’s engagement celebration on the bed. You want to try and approach him, but he looks uncomfortable, creating a tense distance between you two.
"I’ll take the reason we're still together to change his diaper and put on his new clothes. Enjoy your shower," Dean says with a certain sharpness in his tone, preventing you from fully approaching him. You feel bad, maybe even a bit foolish.
"Dean, I didn’t mean to offend you. Or our relationship, just try to…" You can’t finish your sentence because he closes Bobby’s bedroom door in your face. You can hear him playing with your son while likely changing him. So, you turn, heading toward your bedroom to grab your clothes and take a shower. The weight of guilt lingers on your shoulders the entire time, and all you want is for this argument to be over.
Your shower ends up being longer than you intended, mostly because you’re not eager to leave and face more tension with your boyfriend. When you finally finish, you hurry to your room, getting dressed quickly, then fixing your makeup and hair. Dean still seems to be in Bobby’s room with him, probably avoiding further confrontation as well. The silence between you two feels heavy, but you know you’ll need to face it eventually.
"Do you want to talk?" Dean says, appearing behind you, leaning against the doorframe. You glance at him while finishing your lipstick, wondering if this is the moment he’s going to break up with you. There’s a pause, and the tension feels almost unbearable as you try to read his expression. His face is serious, but there's something softer in his eyes, maybe a hint of frustration mixed with hurt.
"I’m not with you just because we had a child, I want to make that clear. I love our family and wouldn’t change anything about it," you say, standing up from your vanity and slowly walking toward Dean. Before he has a chance to respond, you gently kiss him, as if needing that kiss to confirm that everything will be alright. But even as your lips touch his, Dean doesn’t seem to want you close. He gently pushes you away, carefully, as if he doesn’t want to hurt you, but at the same time, he clearly doesn’t want your closeness right now. The distance between you grows, not just physically but emotionally too, and it stings more than words.
"I love you, I love our family. But you and I… we’re not going anywhere. What I mean is, if I still have to prove my intentions about marriage after two years, then what’s the point of all this? You don’t want to marry me, and you just won’t admit it because you don’t want to lose me. But it’s wrong to want to keep me at arm’s length when I’ll never fully be yours. Just like it’s wrong for me to want to keep you as my girlfriend when we’ll never be more than that. And if you don’t want that, it’s fine. But I do. For the sake of our relationship, we have to stop fooling ourselves," Dean says, holding your hands against his chest, his forehead resting against yours. Tears are falling from both of you, though you try to be strong for the sake of your son. The weight of his words sinks in, and the emotions are heavy, but the truth in them is undeniable.
"Ending our relationship isn’t fair. You know you love me, and I love you. We have a child together. Isn’t that enough for you?" you say, your voice breaking with sobs and tears. At this point, it doesn’t matter if your makeup is smudged, if you wish this conversation had never happened, or anything else. The only thing that matters is the ache in your chest and the fear of losing the person you love, the father of your child.
"I want to keep respecting you. I want you to be the woman you are, to have what you want. But I’m not what you want, not anymore. And maybe what’s changed between us is that our futures aren’t the same anymore. Bobby will always be our bond, our son. Our love can last forever, but only if we let the romantic side of it fade away," Dean speaks softly, as if he's at peace with what he's saying. But you can't find that same peace. The words feel like a knife twisting in your chest, and the idea of losing him in this way—letting go of the romantic love you share—is unbearable. You don’t want to accept that this could be the end, even if he sounds so calm, almost resigned.
"I don’t want to lose you, Dean. Maybe we could make some kind of concession to each other. You could move in with me, or we could be like those couples who stay engaged for a long time before actually getting married. Please." You’re bargaining with the father of your child, hoping he’ll reconsider what seems like a definitive decision. But he pulls back, as if he’s unwilling to give in.
"You will never lose me. But I don’t think there’s a solution for our romantic situation. It’s ridiculous that it’s at a moment like this, but we need to understand what we have to do. As parents, we need to give our best for our child. If we continue dating, my resentment towards you will overshadow everything. And you’ll never fully trust me romantically. I’m grateful for you being by my side, showing me how beautiful love can be, and for the child we share, but we’ll have to go our separate ways when it comes to romance." Dean says, pulling away, wiping the tears from his face, and composing himself while you feel like a storm is dragging you away.
"Is it over then?" is all you manage to say amid the chaos of emotions you're feeling. Dean looks at you as he steps back further, preparing to leave.
"Until we can be on the same page about our future and what we want from each other, yes. You’re free, and so am I. I know it won’t be easy, that we’ll need to adjust some arrangements involving Bobby, but I’ll try to be the best father our son deserves. I’ll get ready in my apartment, and I assume you’ll want to go in separate cars. I’ll respect whatever you decide." Dean says, looking at you as if he’s waiting for confirmation that you understand he’s breaking your heart, but it’s for the greater good. You think about yelling, throwing something at him, or doing something dramatic, but your son must be sleeping in the next room, and disturbing him is the last thing you want.
"I want you to leave. I’ll take Bobby later. Don’t expect me to act like everything is fine, but I’ll do my best to be decent and not ruin my sister’s and your brother’s day. Now, just go, Winchester." You say, controlling yourself as much as possible to avoid breaking down and losing your composure. Dean hears your words and seems like he wants to come to you, to comfort you. But how could he fix what’s breaking? So, he leaves, taking part of you with him. You then try to collect yourself, going to your son and holding him in your arms while he sleeps peacefully. At least you have him amid all this.
END
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chewbokachoi · 1 day
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"You said you liked it so I brought it for you." bireenaaaaaa
Eyy looked who finally got to it--sorry for the delay! Ended up a lil longer than anticipated but I had fun regardless :D
Bi-Han felt out of his element.
He was standing, watching just out of sight, not sure if he should make himself known or just continue to observe. Most of him, the sensible part of him (or what remained of it) said he was being obtuse and a creep. But a small part of him, a small voice he ignored for years and thought left for dead, chimed in. What if she hates it? It whispered.
To let insecurity rule him after clawing his way back to life. Bi-Han shoved the voice back once more and slipped out of his hiding place. He snatched up the gift and decided to find Sareena rather than wait in the shadows, or worse, leave it unguarded.
He slipped the parcel into a satchel he had taken to wearing. The idea of being seen carrying around something so carefully wrapped yet so clumsy and unrefined would have been one too many humiliations to deal with. 
Watching Tomas wrap all of the gifts he had prepared for everyone had only done so much to help Bi-Han. He wasn't sure if Tomas appreciated the audience, or who the audience was, but he didn't say anything at least. It was a mix of comfort and further frustration for Bi-Han. While it was good Tomas didn't shun him, Bi-Han resented himself for not knowing how much Tomas truly tolerated him.
Of course it made sense somebody like Bi-Han didn't have as much skill as Tomas at gift wrapping; Tomas who had the time to pursue such a frivolous hobby. But it still gnawed at his pride that he couldn't make something for Sareena half as good. And to even consider asking Tomas to help wrap it for him? Absolutely not.
Bi-Han hoped Sareena would at least appreciate the colors. She always wore black and red. Finding red ribbons was easy enough–black wrapping paper, he found, was harder despite how popular goth fashion and other grim aesthetics had become. Of course part of him was eager to point out it was probably only difficult because he didn't dare ask anyone for help. And then the more delicate part of the gift…Bi-Han found his face warming at the thought of it. It was stupid. He could just leave it in his bag.
To his relief, Bi-Han found Sareena by herself. She was in Liu Kang's library and she had found a rather large, old book. Bi-Han wanted to know what it was, and he wanted to see if he could find out without having to ask. But the closer he got, he saw it wasn't in any language he knew. How much time had he lost out on? Clearly enough for her to have comfortably learned another language.
Despite how quiet Bi-Han was, she knew he was there. Covering his scent on a whim wasn't something he had figured out how to do. Still, he walked close enough to be polite but keep a respectful distance and waited for her to turn around.
Sareena set the book down and turned to face Bi-Han, her expression neutral despite her demonic features. They always made her look vaguely upset or annoyed. In a better mood, Bi-Han could see himself tolerating comments saying that he could relate. But when that mood would finally arrive, he couldn't say. So, instead, he kept his own neutral expression, waiting on Sareena to decide if she had the patience for him or not.
"You're done with training early," she said.
Bi-Han gave a small shrug. "I woke up earlier," he said. He had woken up early so he could get his training in and have time to wrap the gift and present it to her on time.
She tilted her head to the side and narrowed her eyes, the action always somehow ensnaring Bi-Han to her. "I thought you preferred reading one book at a time," she continued, uninterested in Bi-Han's reason for being done with training earlier than she expected. "And the book I last saw you with from here was sizable."
"You are correct," he said, not knowing what else to say. She was still paying attention to him and the thought alone made him want to disappear. He could still make an escape, but he'd have to at least give her her gift. Perhaps while she was distracted by unwrapping it–there was no way it would open neatly–he could disappear. "I came to find you," he said, reaching into the satchel.
Her irises widened like a curious cat's.
Bi-Han pulled out the first gift, his fingers brushing against the second half. For a second, he thought he broke it. But to his relief, it was fine. He pulled out the parcel and handed it to Sareena, barely able to keep his gaze on her.
"Who's this from? Did somebody ask you to deliver this to me?" Sareena asked, pausing her reach.
Bi-Han felt his face flush. "No," he said. And that was all he could manage.
Sareena's surprise gave way to realization. "Oh." She looked back down at the parcel and picked it up, her movements sharp and angular–more demonic than human. She back down on the stone bench, suddenly entranced by the little parcel. "Did you wrap this?" She asked, tugging at the ribbon, a hint of amusement in her voice.
"I may have," Bi-Han muttered, trying to keep his focus on how her hands moved, peeling at the tape and paper. But instead he was watching her face, seeing how happy and curious she was. It occurred to him that the odds of getting a gift from the Netherrealm were low, and they'd be tools more than anything–especially for a demon of her rank.
She pulled back the paper to reveal the gift: a metal, crocodile incense holder. Its mouth was open, meant for the stick to be inserted into the mouth. 
Bi-Han reached into the satchel before she could say anything and pulled out the incense packet. It was wrapped in blue paper with silver wrapping. He had noticed her preference for sour things, and so he hoped she would appreciate the variety of citrus incense sticks he had found. To his relief–and a boost to his pride–Bi-Han could see Sareena could smell what it was through the wrapping.
"Bi-Han," Sareena said, accepting it with her free hand. "Thank you." She looked up. "But…" she trailed off, not wanting to be rude.
Bi-Han couldn't find it in him to see the question as rude. Maybe a small part of it was because she was still a demon and her ways weren't ever going to fully align with the human world. But Bi-Han knew he couldn't judge anyone for any apprehension or hesitation around him. So, he gave her another shrug. "I heard you saying to Ashrah how much you liked it," he nodded to the holder. "So I bought it for you."
Sareena blinked, processing what he had said. Then she smiled. She carefully placed the still unopened bundle of incense sticks in the hand with the burner. Then she picked up the book. "Would you like to join me for some reading?" Sareena asked, moving to make space for Bi-Han.
His eyebrows rose in surprise. Then he looked around, quickly looking for any book to avoid making it awkward. As he walked over to a shelf full of Chinese books and tales, he could hear Sareena unwrapping the other gift. When he returned to the bench, he saw her inserting a stick into the holder. Then she lit it with a light tap of her finger. She turned around and looked up at Bi-Han, the smile still on her face.
He sat down near her, but not next to her.
Sareena crossed her legs, her knee brushing his thigh.
Bi-Han remained where he was–Sareena had done that on purpose, but he couldn't deny he liked the casualness of her proximity to him. The smell of citrus mixing with the enchanted torches that lit the library was providing an odd and unexpected comfort. Bi-Han felt his shoulders relax and found himself hoping this was something he could enjoy again.
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franky-y · 9 months
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