#if you want them to have crazy lesbian sex then thats what they did

[runningwithscizzorz]

Heeey remember when you did this for an ask thingy?

WHAT DID THEY DO IN THOSE FIVE HOURS???? DID THEY FUCK? DID THEY MAKEOUT?? DID THEY KISS AND SLEEP??? WHAT DID THEY DO WE NEED TO KNOW😭

They made this face at eachother for five hours in the world's most intense staring contest

[anonymouscheeses]

Obvious shit I noticed part 3 (spoilers for welcome to heaven)

Look at her! "Teehee"

Also she's nervous! Foreshadowing omg 🤯

STICKERS! Two pride stickers and a cute donut. Gives me an idea to draw Chaggie at a donut shop while everything is burning down <3 (I'll probably do it but if any artist wants to as well go ahead!)

*CHOKES ON COFFEE* I LOVE THEM. I'M SORRY I GET SO GIDDY WHEN THEY HAVE EVEN THE SMALLEST INTERACTION BUT UGHHH I NEED MORE, IT WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH 🙏🙏

KISSY! MWA! *SCREAMS INTO THE VOID*

Vivzie give me more, moar now. MOAR

DAMN. SHE CAN THROW- or maybe it just exaggerates the perspective in this frame but still- ZAMNNN

Cherri x Sir Pentious fans RISE UP.

I wasn't ever really a fan of it myself but I always thought it was CUTE. Like 3 seconds before this part I was already begging for them to kiss 😭

More foreshadowing!

AAAAAA CREEPY BIRD THINGS!!!

Oh wait- Sera's hot and Emily's already adorable

If heaven don't look like what this is in the show, I DONT WANT IT! (THATS A JOKE PLEASE DON'T SMITE ME)

JEALOUS GIRLFRIEND VAGGIE!! Can I just say how much I love Vaggie's face expressions? Not just here but like all the time. She's just made to be so exaggerated, out of all of them I thought it would be Charlie who would have the most dramatic faces but Vaggie wins it for me. I JUST GIGGLE SO HARD WHEN SHE LOOKS LIKE THIS BAHAHAH

Okay yeah. It's very obvious now. Vaggie is definitely an ex-exterminator. They don't close in on Charlie here so it's made to subtly nudge the attention to Vaggie. HOW DID THEY IMMEDIATELY NOTICE IT WAS HER THO??

Hot-

That's it.

SHARE THAT MOTHUSSY GIRL-

YOU'RE TELLING ME SHE GREW OUT ALL OF THAT HAIR?!? YEAH ITS BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE THEN BUT STILL AJJSJD.

But overall the design is pretty meh. I always loved the idea of short hair Vaggie and even have seen art of it but it's just yknow, alright. Reminds me of Cassandra from Tangled: the series. IM LISTENING TO ONE OF THE SONGS RIGHT NOW HELPPP

THIS SCENE HERE! WOOOOO! SO GLAD WE KNOW WHEN AND WHERE THEY FIRST MET!! Wish we got it extended tho. And also probably push it to next episode so it would have a better impact(atleast I think thats when they'll have the duet). BUT WHATEVER SOMETHING IS BETTER THAN NOTHING! or uh whatever

Vaggie must've been a bit terrified at first. The only sinner she ever sent mercy to was a child. Then to see someone who to her is an adult sinner who just looks really human, that must be crazy. BUT THEN IF SHE WAS TOLD THAT CHARLIE WAS ACTUALLY THE PRINCESS OF HELL? HOOOO, LOCK IN AND STEAL HER. THAT'S SOME WATTPAD SHIT. Also, I wonder how long Charlie thought of redeeming sinners. It would make sense to be after meeting Vaggie, since it could have been a wake up call to the fact not all sinners are bad people. Even though Vaggie isn't a sinner technically, Charlie didn't know that at the time. But maybe Charlie was always like this but just needed to meet someone who could start her dream with her. Long rant uhhh

Haha penis 🫵

SCRAP WHATEVER I SAID IN THE FIRST PART. THEY PROBABLY DO FUCK- OR DONT?? I DONT KNOW- ANYWAY LESBIAN SEX (BOTTOM TEXT). WHY DO I CARE SO MUCH??? SOMEONE PULL THE TRIGGER.

Lute looks like a basic asf anime gorl. Adam doesn't ever take his helmet off, or maybe he just can't. OH HE'S DOING THE GAY SIGN 💅💅 Very appropriate for what he's saying

Mentor, apprentice. I love that Husk is just trying to help Angel grow but isn't going to force him into it if he doesn't want to.

Im not a fan of huskerdust and think they'd be better friends as I can't imagine a relationship with them at all. But it's still nice and they are supportive of eachother so that's like- yknow. Basic rules. Or something like that. (HELP. I ruined it all at the last part)

I- girl- WHY IS SHE GROWLING?? GRR GRR RR (INSERT TWILIGHT SAGA HERE)

VAGGIE'S FACE. SENDS ME. WHO GAVE HER THESE OVERDRAMATIC EXPRESSIONS, I APPLAUD YOU RGAGAGA

Ooo... I didnt like this part at all... Instead of making the choice she just runs off. Then because the plot demands it, Adam says nothing. Kinda whish she atleast avoided the question, maybe in some way that would require actual thinking? For a character like Vaggie, she could choose either way and it feel like it's still her. If she chose to protect Charlie's dream, she would still be perfectly loyal to her but in the act of so would reveal a secret that could harm their relationship(which does happen at the end but that's because the plot wanted it like that). If she chose to side with Adam, she'd be hurting Charlie emotionally, sure, but it would keep a secret that could make Charlie see Vaggie less than who she is to her already(atleast what Vaggie might think would happen). Imo it should've been her deciding to protect Charlie, since it would mean she's devoted to her at all times.

ANOTHER THING! IF SHE COULDN'T MAKE THE CHOICE, THAT IS SOMETHING INTERESTING TO GO INTO. Maybe it could go deeper into how Vaggie doesn't know who she is without Charlie. So when she has a choice to make, like here, she can't do it without feeling the need to ask Charlie. BUT NOOO, YA HAD TO GO WITH THIS!! Wow. That was a long ass rant. Wtf 😭

Maybe I'm a dumbass. Maybe they'll talk about that next episode, but still, atleast touch on it a bit to not seem rushed?

Angel looking out for his kids like a mom. We always did need the motherly figure, the one closest to that being Charlie but girl needs a mother in her life too(damn, wait, I did her so dirty).

Huh, so why does it work here then? 🤨🤨 if it was said in the contract that Valentino can do whatever he wants only in the studio, then why is this the exception? 🤨🤨

Yes I'm stupid. Why do you ask? (No genuinely what's happening here)

OH ITS THE IMAGE! I really like Sera so far, hope we get more of her soon or in season 2.

Now that we know the context of this, yeah, that's fucking insane. And badass. WOMEN.

HMM. THATS STRANGE. DID YOU NOT FOR ONCE THINK THERE COULD BE A POSSIBILITY SHE MIGHT HAVE BEEN AN ANGEL? Okay I probably wouldn't either but I have an excuse, I'm an idiot. Some girl with a standing out outfit, with one eye, looks unusually human, right after/during the extermination... that's pretty solid ass proof. But I'm dumb so don't take anything i say seriously :D

Imagine this. No- shit. Just-

JUST LOOK! THEY ARE SO CUTE! EVEN THOUGH CRAZY SHIT IS HAPPENING.

*SWEATS*

Vaggie is DESPERATE. PLEADING. That's obvious yeah, but don't mind me I had nothing to say for the last 3 images I just thought they were cool

I mean. Slay I guess. 😍💅

Do all the exterminators look similar or is it just Lute and Vaggie? 🤨

Even though Vaggie and Charlie may be going through this horrible thing with a hard punch in the gut, but Vaggie is always going to comfort her and I just think that's so adorable.

Also Adam looks like a chicken hah.

Everyone fears to be like Lucifer. If they don't do bad things they believe are for the greater good and make sacrifices that put them higher than those in hell, they could themselves be fallen. It's really interesting but I don't know if it's going to be fleshed out enough with the amount of episodes left. Which also worries me about everything else that still hasn't be concluded. There's gonna be loose strings I just know it. Hopefully though they rather do that then rush everything out y'know?

I want the next episode to be mostly focused on Vaggie and Charlie's relationship and the healing of what happened. Not for the entire episode of course, it would feel drawn out if it did, but atleast address the problem for the first like I would say 10 minutes? Then the rest would focus on one or two loose threads while also having Vaggie and Charlie acting upon moving on. That's just my idea but yeah-

[the-pea-and-the-sun]

how did it take me so long to start calling myself aromantic/arospec. like now that ive actually started using the term for myself its so crazy to me that i wasnt using this term since the first time i heard about it. i literally remember like almost a year ago being like "i wish i could just call myself aromantic itd just be a way easier way to explain to people the sort of relationships i want since im interested in sex and really close friendships but not really interested in traditional romantic relationships right now" like my brother you CAN?? jesus fuck. like this thought came aftera series of relationships where i would tell my friends that i had a crush on someone, then the relationship progressed in someway, then i got the sense that the person i was interested in had romantic feelings for me and id get this weird horrible feeling and would run away. and i was literally like "what is this whats going on". i was like woah this must be like.... commitment issues or something. like i was going around telling people that. i was getting over commitment issues that were surely temporary. but they werent asking me to commit to anything they just had feelings for me that i couldnt reciprocate bcz i was just attracted to them and wanted to me friends with them and i thought thats what romantic attraction was. i literally remember telling someone abt someone i liked an they were like "why dont u ask them out?" an my answer was just that i was trying to find reasons not to and i couldnt. cuz i was attracted to them and liked spending time with them and liked being their friend but i was so so happy not being in a romantic relationship anymore and i couldnt shake the feeling that if i got into another one even with the perfect person it was literally gonna ruin my life and i would have to pretend to have feelings that i didnt have.

idk im frustrated that i hadnt considered it sooner but its also kinda exciting to discover something abt urself an ur sexuality. like this label brings me the same joy that other labels that ive discovered fit me do like i feel like how i felt when i came to terms w being trans an being bisexual. i feel like im 13 again finding trans and bisexual youtubers and being like "??? there are others?" like ppl dont talk abut it as much w being aro and ace bcz those are defined by the absence of a feeling rather than the presence of one but it really can be just as exciting to find out that you're aro or ace as it can be to discover that you're a lesbian or gay or transgender or something.

like not to be cheesy but discovering that i could just. have friends and also have sex made everything kinda click in my head for me. like literally i felt like a more complete person. experiencing that and realizing like. oh. this is amazing this is literally all i want like nothing is missing. i literally just dont have to do romance stuff like no ones making me do that why did i think i have to do that. like oh my god this is such a good feeling i really can do whatever i want forever.

this post doesnt rly have a point exactly i just kinda have a lot of feelings to get out. i love you aromantic ppl i love being aromantic it fucking rules actually. every aromantic person whos posted abt their experience an helped me get comfortable w the label i owe u a hundred billion dollars jesus christ i love you guys

[melaniedragonnsfw]

I like how my ocs piss off so many horny people in the roleplaying community.

The only oc that would fuck a dude is Mel. Mel is a fat baddie. Due to her body type she intimidates weird people.

Now once people find out she’s bisexual they get excited over the thought of a threesome, only to find out that she is 100% monogamous and is repulsed by the thought of a threesome.

Now, Mel is demisexual and had trust issues. So you gotta be on her trust level 9000 to even see her pussy lips.

If you are lucky to actually have sex with her, she might even be a virgin! Yippeee! However, she is not at all the “Ooh I am so pure, I never touched my coochie. Idk what a blowjob is.” Type of bullshit. She has at least twenty different vibrators.

Sure, she never had sex with anyone. But she definitely put a vibrator up her cooch. The big ones too. She lives alone and is in her twenties, of course she jerks off. She also reads fanfics. She knows what sex is and knows what to expect. Be ready.

Nobody can not participate in the ever so popular breeding/pregnancy kinks with Mel. Mel had her tubes removed. It is physically impossible for her to get pregnant. She did this because she genuinely hates children and the whole idea of being pregnant.

Mel is not submissive in the slightest. It is possible for her to be submissive towards the right person if she trusts them enough. But really, she is more likely to bend you over and shove four of her fingers up your ass and make you beg for her to even let you cum. So I mean… However! She does enjoy bottoming though! Mel is quite lazy, so she’ll happily let you top. When she bottoms there is a high chance that she’ll leave scratches all over your back and leave hickies and bites everywhere she can put that mouth on.

Sure there is always a few people who has that oc that is all like “well, I am so big and tough and I can break her.” No you can’t. Actually if you tried to force Mel to do anything she isn’t comfortable with, she will rip off your dick. There will be no warning either. One second you are pinning her up against the wall, the other you are laying on the floor, bleeding, screaming and crying because somehow she managed to get her hand free and rip your dick off. She lifts weights for fun and kills people. She can rip your dick off if she wanted to.

And that is only for oc number one.

-

Lets get onto my other two ocs!

Reena and her wife Luna!

Reena and Luna are married! And poly! But they are both lesbians and only date other women. So fellas, please get the fuck away from them. They will kill you if you make unwanted advances towards them.

But thats okay. The sex is probably fire. That is not true at all actually. Reena is asexual. She has sex maybe once every ten years. Luna is demisexual and has a lot of insecurities about her naked body. Sex is unlikely.

Now, even though Reena is asexual and has sex once every ten years, she is surprisingly a pillow princess. She’s just going to chill while you are putting in all the work.

Luna is trans. Now if you are one of those people who fetishizes trans women by calling them futa or whatever, go kys. Fuck you and your mama. Clearly you weren’t raised right. Also, Luna had both top and bottom surgery. She has a coochie. So fuck you again. Your fetishizing will not work here.

Anyways, Luna is a switch but she likes only really gentle and vanilla sex. She doesn’t like anything rough or kinky. She thinks fuzzy handcuffs is crazy weird. So I mean, if that’s not your thing idk what to tell you.

[femmesandhoney]

it makes me so sad seeing so many women going “i’m not a woman i’m nonbinary/genderfluid/demi girl/some other made up thing because i’m uncomfortable being objectified/i’m not a hyper feminine cliche of what a woman is/i have low self esteem/etc”. regardless of all that they’re still women and being a woman is an amazing thing. and no matter what they choose to identify as they will still face sex based oppression. they’re still women and will always be women. trying to hide from that fact and deny their womanhood will help no one. but it’s 2021 and everyone and everything is valid, and if you say any different you’re oppressing the kweer community.

i wish i had been more open to listening to radfems when my friend decided they were out of the blue nonbinary. i actually did try to talk her about it because even as a libfem i geninuely didn't think she was lmao, but i had to really approach her gently because if i hit too close to her actual insecurities she would just shut the conversation down. i think she realized i was actually making good points about why she might have been feeling "not like a woman" and that scared her. its easier for a lot of these women to ignore their feelings and any deep analysis of where they stem from and jump into the cozy box of "non binary" as a shield.

i just hate that everyone calls you a terf, a gatekeeper, a bitch, a cunt, literally everything under the sun if you don't agree to be a constant validation machine for other people. you harbor one "wrong" opinion and youre a nazi facist. like its unbelievable how intensely so many young kids and teens nowadays think that if you aren't this super inclusive to everything person youre literally the devil.

ive seen so many people from exclus spaces essentially give up their beliefs and suddenly become inclus bc of how fucking spiteful and hateful the inclus side of liberal feminism is. they sent gore, death threats, suicide bait, and so much worse just because LGBT (for exclus) members of the community wanted to gatekeep and make sure it wasn't alphabet soup. let me repeat: these kids who harp over and over about everything and everyone being valid and to just be nice and kind and considerate of others feelings and identities are literally the most disgusting motherfuckers you'll find. they are literally crazy to people who have different opinions that don't 100% validate them. and this constant demoralizing and mental harm it does to people, like literally makes them give up to stop receiving the hate and threats, is another reason i began looking into radfem spaces.

i wasn't about to drop my morals, but i certainly was confused as fuck about what was happening to liberal feminism. most of my old lesbian mutuals had either gone full inclus and hated me for stating i was a lesbian who only liked women (and again, as a libfem, we included TW), but it really didn't matter how much me and my remaining exclus lesbians parroted libfem rhetoric, we got attacked over and over. it didn't matter we were already libfems, we had to be broken down in our spaces online until we admitted everything was valid and we were actually meanies and super harmful and shit. thats the endgoal of intense libfems and TRAs. to make everyone who has a thread of logic to unravel it all and go join their clusterfuck of inclusivity.

[thosesouthparkimagines]

For You, Anything. (Cartman!Reader x Kyle)

(Y/N) Cartman. My full name. Sibling to the well known as an idiot, Eric Cartman. We were twins, I was born 10 minutes earlier, much to his dismay,and he always made my life a living hell for it. He did not think it was fair to him that he was younger, but that was the way it was. 

“(Y/NNNNNN). Come on. We’re gonna be lateeeee” my brother groans, his annoying voice slipping out as he whines. “Come onnnnn.” 

“Relax Eric, I’ll come when I come” I say, irritated. 

“Haha. Thats what she-”

“Finish that statement and I’ll punch your teeth in” . He goes silent. I’m the only one he’d listen to because he knows I won’t put up with his bullshit. 

“Finally. Jesus woman, you take forever to get ready” Eric says, sighing in relief when I finally come downstairs ready to go.

“Yeah, yeah. Lets just go before we miss the bus.” 

This was the first year I was attending school with Eric. When we were younger, we did not get along, so I went to live with our father. He got sick of me and sent me back to live with my mom and Eric, telling me to never contact him again, and then I was forced to finish my senior year of high school in a new city, with new people, with my twin brother, who I have learned, has the reputation of an asshole. 

We arrive down at the bus stop, where we  are met with four other boys our age. One  with black hair wearing a red and blue hat, one blonde haired kid, hiding most of his face in a parka, and the last one, a red haired boy, wearing a green hat. 

“Hey Cartman.” The one in the blue hat says, referring to my brother, but pauses when he sees me next to him. “Um. Who’s this” 

“Yeah she’s hot. I’d like to get a piece of that” the orange parka boy says. 

“I’m (Y/N) Car-” I’m cut off. 

“Her name is (Y/N). She just moved here. We’re neighbors.” He gives me a death glare which immediately tells me to shut my mouth. 

“Uh, Hi” I notice the guy in the green hat still hasn’t said anything to me. He just stares. It’s really creepy. 

“Fatass. What did you do to this poor girl?” Green hat guy asks, looking at me in concern. “She seemed scared out of her wits.” Oh I wasn’t scared. Eric wanted to pretend I wasn’t his sister, fine, but I’m going to play this to the best of my abilities. 

“He didn’t do anything to me” I say sweetly, batting my eyelashes, and the green hatted kid’s face goes bright red. “I never did catch your name. I don’t think its fair you know mine, but I don’t know yours” 

“Uh, K-Kyle”  he is  a red, stuttering mess. But his name fits him. I don’t exactly know how it fits so well, but just by looking at his face, it matches. The green eyes, freckles littered around the bridge of his nose like stars at twilight. It’s soothing. We both get caught up in our staring we forget about the other three boys standing next to us, carrying on with their own conversation, or the fact that the school bus pulled up and was waiting for us to board. It seemed as if we were in our own little world. 

“Hey!”. It’s Eric’s screaming that breaks us out of our trance, both looking away with red cheeks that didn’t come from the freezing Colorado air. “Let’s gooooo” he whines, for the countless time this morning. 

“Jesus, fatass, okay we’ll get on” Kyle says, irritation easily changing his entire attitude.  He looks towards me and notions for me to get on the bus before him, after the other three had boarded and taken their seats. The entire bus ride was boring, just Kyle and Eric going back and forth between each other, insults making their way in every other word. I sat next to the boy with the blue hat that introduced himself as Stan, and behind the parka wearing boy named Kenny, who remained turned around in his seat no matter how many times he got yelled at. 

The bus ride to the small high school was short, too short for my liking. Talking with Stan and Kenny was a lot of fun, and I didn’t want to end it. But as quickly as our friendship had come, the conversations had come to an end.  

“Hey, (Y/N)! What class do you have first?” Stan asks, as we exit the bus and stand at the entrance of South Park High. It reminded me of the school back home, with the obvious cliques seen just by gazing around the campus, and the judgemental looks I felt by anyone who walked by. 

“Um, English, with um Mr.Garrison?” 

“Oh shit dude” Kenny speaks “You’re with me!”. He slings his arm across my shoulders and flashes me a bright smile.

“Woah, Kenny, you got Garrison?” Cartman asks, bursting out laughing. “Oh man that’s great”

“What’s so bad about Garrison?” I ask, shrugging off Kenny’s arm, blind to the glare Kyle sent towards the parka wearing boy. 

“Oh man what isn’t wrong with him? He was our fourth grade teacher and  underwent like 4 sex changes, went from being gay, to lesbian, to straight, back to gay, and then became president and tried to build a wall between us and Mexico. He insane” Stan says, making elaborate hand gestures to show effect. 

“He seems crazy, you guys must have had a rough childhood from that. I’m sorry”. All three boys laugh at that. 

“You have no idea how rough our childhood was” Kyle chuckles. The second he finishes laughing, the bell rings, sending us in our separate ways in promise to meet up for lunch. I follow Kenny towards the classroom, eager to see the man that seemed so bad. Upon entering the room, Mr.Garrison is standing in front of several rows of desks, a chalkboard behind. Could they not afford computers and screens? The old school I attended had them. Mr.Garrison was an older man, half balding with grey hair as the little he had. Some sort of puppet was on his left hand. Great, he seemed as crazy as the guys made him out to be. 

“Oh. You must be the new girl.” Mr.Garrison says, and I nod, and walk up to him. 

“Could you not mention my last name please? I’m trying to avoid people knowing” I say quietly to him, and he looks at his roster and his eyes widen. 

“(Y/N) Cartman? You’re related to that little asshole?” He says loudly, but not loud enough for anyone to hear, just the person standing behind me. 

“You’re related to Cartman?” I hear Kenny’s muffled, but shock filled question. I turn around and cover his mouth, or where I think his mouth is. 

“You can’t tell anyone! You have to promise me!” I say quickly, and Kenny chuckles. 

“Oh man, Kyle has a thing for you and you’re related to that fatass. Good luck”. He turns towards the rows of desks and sits down, patting the seat next to him, motioning for me to sit. I take the desk next to him, and next to another kid. He seems to be wearing a letterman jacket, with brown hair. Just by the way he was sitting, it was easy to see that he was cocky. The second I sat down in my seat beside Kenny, he turns his entire body away from the blonde girl he was talking with. 

“I haven’t seen you around here. Are you new?” He asks “I’m Clyde, Clyde Donivian” he says, extending a hand out towards me.

“(Y/N).” I give him a smile. 

“A beautiful name for a beautiful girl” he says, flashing a smile, when Kenny interrupts. 

“Back off Donivan. Kyle’s called dibs” Kenny chuckles, and in return Clyde pouts, going back to flirting with the girl in the opposite side of him. I turn towards Kenny. 

“What do you mean that Kyle called dibs? I’m not something that you can just, claim” I say, before turning and facing forward as the bell rings. Kenny attempts to get my attention throughout the rest of class but I chose to ignore him, still a bit upset. 

Soon enough lunch comes, and I make my way towards the cafeteria, after stopping and asking for directions a few times. Entering the loud, crowded cafeteria, instantly notoicing the orange parka and green hat, she makes a beeline towards the only group she really knows. She makes it about halfway when she’s whipped away by a blue hooded man, towards another table. 

“What? Hey!” She says, attempting to getr out of this strangers grasp. Being this close to him, she began to notice a few things. His black hair stuck out in small parts of his hood, and he had extremely blue eyes. He leads me towards a table. I recognize the brown haired boy from class, Clyde, but there was also two other boys seated there. 

“Craig-ack! You can’t just-just drag her here!” the blonde haired boy says, his words stuttered. 

“Yeah! You should have asked her!” he turns to me. “I uh, I’m sorry about Craig here. I’m Token. These are my friends, Tweek-” he points to the blonde one, “Craig” he points to the one still holding onto me, who in return flips them off, “and Clyde”. 

“Uh, hi? Why am I over here?” I ask, turning towards the boys at the table 

“Well, you’re hot, we’re hot, you should be with us” Clyde speaks up, attempting to wink. 

“Yeah- uh, no. I’ll be going back now” I say, attempting to leave, but Craig, still silent, grabs hold of my arm. 

“Sit” his voice finally speaks. Not wanting to go against him, I sit on the empty side of the table, as far as I could from the boys, which becomes futile as Craig sits right beside me. 

“So, (Y/N). What brings you to south park?” Token asks

“I decided to move back with my mom who lives here” is all I say, not really wanting to talk to the guys who quite literally kidnapped me. 

“Ack- you’re-you’re from here?” Tweek says, to which I give a nod. 

“(Y/N)!” I hear a voice and my head whips around, and I see Kenny storming towards me. He grabs hold of my arm and takes me from the table, much to their irritation. “Why are you with these assholes? You’re supposed to be with us!” he says, beginning to drag me back towards their table. 

Stan seemed to be interested into the black haired girl sitting at the table, while Kyle and Eric were arguing over something. The second I arrived back at their table, they go silent,. Kyle sends me a smile as I sit, which I return. 

“Where the hell were you (Y/N)? You were supposed to be here ten minutes ago!” Eric complains “Not like you care, but Craig and his crew apparently had something important to say to me”

“You were with Craig's crew! Stay away from them! They’re not good influences!” I roll my eyes

“It wasn’t like I wanted to go over there” 

“Whatever. Give me my cheezy poofs-” Eric mumbles, before I throw the bag of the chips at him. 

“Fatass- stop harassing the new girl! Bring your own cheey poofs” Kyle says 

“Well our mom packed them for me but then she put them in (Y/N)’s bag instead of mine.” Kyle freezes 

“Wait- are you- related to fatass” Kyle asks, looking towards me. 

“I-uh, yeah. He’s my twin” I admit. Instantly Kyle is up out of his seat and making his way into the hall. 

I look towards Stan, since they seem to be the closest, but he shrugs, as if not knowing what to say. 

The rest of the day goes without a hitch. I finish my classes and make my way home, choosing to walk rather than ride the bus. Kyle refused to look me in the eye the rest of the day, which really hurt. 

Once I arrive home, I head straight up to my room, not stopping to listen to Eric calling our mother all the names he could for the mix up at lunch. Shutting and locking the door behind me, I sigh, pulling out my headphones and starting my homework. I had a lot to catch up on, especially since I came in the middle of the school year, but It was easy, especially because I had already learned most of it from my other school. 

A solid and hard knock on my window is what jolts me from my focus. I whip my head around to see the familiar green hat outside my window. Instantly I go and open it, allowing him to crawl in and sprawl on my bedroom floor. A few puffs of his red hair stuck out of his hat as he went to catch his breath. 

“What-what are you doing here?” I ask, sitting back on my bed. Last I checked, he was angry at me for being related to Eric. It’s not like I could change that. 

“I-I wanted to apologize” he says, sitting up after catching his breath. “I shouldn’t have gotten mad. I just, couldn’t believe you’re related to the fatass” 

“Our parents separated when we were young. Our father took me away with him. He soon sent me back here” I say. “I hardly know Eric.” 

“You both are so different. You’re so amazing. You’re smart, kind, pretty-” he pauses, his cheeks going bright red. “I-I didn’t mean that. No- I’m mean, you are pretty, I just didn’t mean to say it- no I did mean to say it agh!” he says, before falling silent. 

“Kyle-” 

“Damnit! I have feelings for you and the fact that you’re related to that asshole-”

“Kyle” 

‘You’re so much different than he is and I really like you, and I-”

“Damnit Kyle just shut up!” I shout, which finally gets his attention. “I like you too okay? Now stop being such a baby about this” I say

“Wait-you-you feel the same?” he asks, to which I nod.

“I thought it was obvious-” I can’t finish my sentence before he throws himself onto me, kissing me. I’ve read somewhere that the first kiss feels like fireworks, but this seem to feel better. 

He doesnt stop, even when we both need air, he pulls back and goes right back into kissing me, shifting until he’s hovering over me on my bed. When he finally pulls away, we’re both panting, red in the cheeks. 

“Does this mean you’ll be my girlfriend?” Kyle asks, before lying next to me. 

“That depends, if you’re willing to put up with Eric”

“For you? Anything”

[uh-drarry]

Can i ask what the difference between ace and aro is? If not thats totally fine! I was just curious, have a lovely day ♥️

Of course!! I hope you are having a lovely day as well, nonnie. Thanks for the ask! I’m not an expert but I have done a lot of research since realizing I was both ace and aro but I only recently realized this within the last six months so I’m going to give kind of broad terms and they both definitely have more definitive terms depending on the person using them. Ace is short for Asexual. Aro is short for Aromantic. (As I type this Aromantic is showing as a spelling error, and if that doesn’t tell you anything about how underrepresented that community is idk what will). This got a bit long, so I am putting it all under the cut.

Asexual people feel little to no sexual attraction. The opposite of this is Allosexual, meaning you do feel sexual attraction. Asexual is an umbrella term and there’s many micro labels under it as well. This doesn’t mean aces don’t have a libido though. Some people have high or low libidos and are still Ace because it’s about sexual attraction. Asexual people sometimes define themselves as one of the following, sex favorable (does enjoy sex, but possibly won’t initiate it themselves, or they could live without it but are happy to partake as far as I understand), sex positive (this can mean the previous, or, like me, they encourage others to have sex if they want it, and believe safe sex should be taught, etc.), sex neutral (they might enjoy sex, but eh, that’s cool if they never do it again, or ever), and sex repulsed (might get nauseous at the thought of it, never wants to partake, depending who they are they might not want to see it, hear it, watch it, etc even within media, nothing). Back to feeling or not feeling sexual attraction, for example, I have never once looked at, say Chris Hemsworth or Zendaya, and thought “Yeah, they turn me on, I’d have sex with them.” (Honestly the fact that I really had to think to come up with names there, which I think it very telling, I’m laughing at myself). *oversharing probably but trying to help people understand, sorry* Despite the my lack of sexual attraction to anyone, I do feel things, for example, when I read smut or something similar. Ace people might get themselves off, have sex, or never do anything of the sort down there. That kind of thing is about feeling good, you don’t have to think your partner or whatever is sexy in order to do that. If anyone wants to do their own research, AVEN.com (Asexual Visibility and Education Network) is probably a good starting point, or I can rec some blogs here.

Aromantic people feel little to no romantic attraction. Very different from feeling sexual attraction, yes? Basically, take all of what I wrote about being Ace and exchange sex with romance and that’s an aromantic person. I will explain anyway. Just like allosexual, alloromantic people are people who do feel romantic attraction. Romantic attraction is when you want to do romantic coded things with people. Of course romance is a bit harder to define than sex, so it can mean a lot of things to different people. Kissing can be seen as romantic to one person, and another aro person could really enjoy kissing others for example. Personally, I get pretty uncomfortable in romantic situations regarding myself and someone else, which I would probably define as being Romance Repulsed. After learning what this term meant and reading some about it, I really thought of my experiences. I’m pretty sure I’ve never had a crush on anyone, relationships (the brief two that I’ve had) really just felt like friendships. I didn’t initiate anything besides maybe handholding because I didn’t know what to do, or I didn’t even realize that was a thing that most people in that situation would be doing at that point in a relationship. I felt very uncomfortable when a ex tried to take a kiss further than a peck, among other things. Again, being Aromantic doesn’t mean aro people automatically will never have or want romantic relationships. They just don’t feel those feels for people usually. Like AVEN for asexuals, there’s Arocalypse.com for aro people. I have less blogs to rec here, but I can rec some if someone wants it.

There are good examples of different types of attraction, I personally feel platonic attraction which would be the desire to be someone’s friend, as well as aesthetic attraction which is defined below.

People can be one, or both, or neither. I am both, AroAce. People in these communities often use the Split Attraction Model (SAM). Which would be like someone stating that they are Asexual Homoromantic, or Aromantic Heterosexual, or Aromantic Pansexual, among many other combos.

Because I do feel aesthetic attraction, pretty much solely towards women, I define myself as an Oriented AroAce, or Lesbian AroAce. If I ever did end up in a relationship with someone, I can only ever imagine it to be with a woman. Again though, that’s just one microlable among so many that are out there.

This is a huge list of identities and labels, it overwhelms be tbh, but I’m linking it here anyway because it’s very informative.

I assume this ask was in response my reblog here. Yes I get very annoyed when people treat these two orientations as the same thing, despite me identifying as both. As I hope you can now see, they are very different things. A lot of the time, I enjoy reading about romance and sometimes sexual relationships, but sometimes I want to read other peoples thoughts, fics, posts, etc about only one of these and the Aro/Aromanticism tag is flooded with posts about asexuality which really doesn’t help people who are trying to learn about aromanticism or wanting specific content.

One more point before I wrap this up. I read a book because I wanted to see if it’d help me know for sure if I was demisexual (definition can be found in the huge list I linked two paragraphs up, or on google), and it actually made me realize I was aroace and I am forever grateful for it so I will rec it here. It’s called Loveless by @aliceoseman and it has quickly become my favorite book. So if anyone wants to read about a fictional character realizing they’re aroace, this is a fantastic book. I related so much to Georgia, it’s crazy. Also her other works are fantastic.

Remember you are not alone! Experts believe that 1% of the population is ace (and I think it’s the same for aro people) and that might sound like no one but, guys, theres 7.8 billion people on this planet. That means theres 78 million people like us! I ended up finding a lot of ace people to follow on twitter as well by the way.

This might be a hot take to some but the A in LGBTQIA+ does not mean ally! It’s for Asexual, Aromantic, and Agender! And we do belong in the queer community because the queer community is for people who aren’t straight, cis, or amatonormative. Wow, I hope this all makes sense, if any of you are confused or have more thoughts, or I messed something up, UNLESS YOU’RE BEING APHOBIC, add your thoughts, or message me!

Side note: Do please send me recs of people to follow, books, fics, shows, whatever, I am always searching for new content within these orientations!

[menalez]

I just find it so annoying the time, energy and debates the discussions like this usually turn into. Something nasty or then crazy gc discourse or someone calling you a fake lesbian on rf gossip. The nitpicking is ridiculous. As soon as I saw this thread I knew someone was gonna call you bi or get mad because she didn’t get by you saying looks you mean aesthetic. You can like a character or actors personality or acknowledge they have a nice aesthetic or be a fan without being into them. Just from now maybe use aesthetic and not looks because looks to most people means physical attraction.

So many people get so hostile and are just waiting to call some actual lesbian bi. I don’t think white fems even think about how much harder it is for lesbians of color to get where they are and how bad the pressures and socialization is. Radical feminists are massive hypocrites with their own works and beliefs. Cognitive dissonance of their own going on about how women are socialized and sexuality. Their empathy, perspective and analysis seems to disappear when it’s needed the most. Liking men can put your life in danger and women of color are especially not allowed to desire only be desired by men.

We exist as business transactions all over the world, denied so much and barely allowed to be our own person. Sexuality can be deeply suppressed. Women aren’t taught or allowed to have their own desires and to know their own bodies or orgasms, just how to please men. In high school every discussion amongst girls involved blowing men or how cum is good for your skin. No one talked about pleasing a girl ever. I hated having to hear it & girls doing it because that’s what they’re taught. even bi women I’ve met have just blown men for years and never been sexually satisfied or reciprocated by men once. Then they got lucky and realized they liked women and fell for one. So yeah I think no lesbian actually obviously fantasizes about males in anyway fictional or not. Plenty bi women feel like that and don’t want a male irl. Penis repulsion is thing. A fantasy is representative of a desire or scenario of something or someone you find pleasant and makes you feel things. I know lesbians who love anime and cartoons who just love butches and they still never fantasize about a male because it isn’t what a butch is. That anon is fantasizing about male characters and I think that’s not lesbian period. No lesbian is excited by maleness and depictions of it. I think it should end their.

So anyway, no one also does this with gay men. gay men don’t argue about this and call other men fake gay men. Maybe that’s because it’s so different being a woman and experiencing misogyny and homophobia with sexuality and the fact that bisexual men aren’t saying they’re gay or being problematic and annoying in the same way bi women who are always lesphobic do. idk. Gay men don’t go through female socialization and are taught to be submissive so it’s easier for them to be confident and at least know or realize their desires much more easier than lesbians. Some things to think about. bi women are so annoying to us and love to hate lesbians and wanna be one but this shit doesn’t happen much or in the same way or extent with gay and bisexual men. I think people need examine the misogyny and double standards here.

it’s kinda bizarre to me bc i straight up said repeatedly that i don’t really get it and that i personally have always just gotten extremely bored when male characters are involved n don’t care for anything about males.. yet bc i said i don’t think someone’s not a lesbian if she likes anime guys or w/e it means i also like fictional men in any sense 😐

u did lose me in some parts tho and the part where u said no bi men claim to be gay, thats untrue. there’s plenty of bi men that call themselves gay men, it’s just never turned into a discussion of Some Gay Men Can Be Into Women or w/e and it’s not used to prove that gay men can be attracted to women to the same degree. but unfortunately plenty of bi people of both sexes claim to be gay. some will call themselves gay bc they genuinely think they are exclusive same sex attracted while some will say they’re gay bc they’re primarily same sex attracted and think that’s the same thing. it’s terrible bc it rly makes it harder for gay ppl to communicate our sexualities and also to form communities around our shared sexual orientation

anyways i think u may have sent me the longest anon ive ever had,, i wish i could give u an award for that

[comradekatara]

The good place is kind of eh in practice but I really like the concept so.... gaang and fire lesbians reactions to a good place scenario?

upon being told they’re in the good place, katara, aang & suki are like, “oh, sweet,” ty lee and zuko are like, “what??? i am???” toph and mai are like, “oops i’m here by mistake,” sokka’s like, “theres. theres a points system. thats bullshit this is bullshit,” and azula’s just like *has a panic attack* 

everyone gets a soulmate!!!!! yay!!!!! katara, meet zuko. sokka, meet toph. mai, meet azula. ty lee, meet suki (this one backfires because they actually do fall in love). oh, and aang, since you’re a monk, you don’t have a soulmate i guess! but you don’t mind that, right? haha no, of course not! aang keeps having to pretend like he’s fine being the only one without a soulmate, and mai’s just like “oh u can have my soulmate if u want” and aang’s like “oh....no.......that’s okay........ but thanks” 

sokka is told that he’s about to meet his soulmate, and he’s like “ok this will be fun” because at this point he’s just decided to go along with it until ashton kutcher jumps out from behind a pot plant or smth. he doesn’t know whether he can trust toph yet, so when she says, “you’ll stand by me no matter what, right?” he’s like “oh of course.” and then she tells him she was sent here by mistake, and she doesn’t know what to do. he’s like, “who forking knows what to do right now this is. this is objectively insane, right????” and she’s like “well, objectively speaking, yes, but it’s also a bit presumptuous of you to assume that an afterlife that measured morality on a points basis didn’t exist just because it sounds silly as fuck when you say it out loud.” and he’s like. “no. we’re definitely being punk’d.” and she’s like “did you just say fork? lmao loser”

ty lee is all “but it doesn’t really make sense that i’m here” and suki’s like “why not? you’re nice and you smell good” and ty lee’s like “but i’m.....super sketchy.......... i’ve committed like......actual felonies???” and suki’s like “ok but who fucking cares tho” and ty lee’s like “ykw GREAT point” and then they kind of just take advantage of the fact that they’re in a magical truman show because that’s the kind of shit you do when you figure out what’s actually going on, duh. michael thinks they hate each other because every time he goes to check in on them they are literally fighting each other??? he’s like oh wait......is this maybe........too far??? but he doesn’t know what to do about that other than maybe recommend some couple’s therapy and they go for laughs and ty lee sobs dramatically and suki wails various bits and pieces of a made up backstory that gets more and more absurd and incongruous every week. 

mai and azula are perfect for each other! they have so much in common! for one thing, they both have no idea what the fuck they’re doing here. for another, they do not trust the other as far as they can throw them, and so they are both suffering silently and alone as they try to piece together why they’re here. they live right next door to toph and sokka, so they’re always running into each other, until eventually they are thrown into enough weirdly coincidental situations together that they just become friends. mai actually thinks toph is pretty cool. they kind of just get each other, yknow? what if there was, like, a mixup and.... *gasp* and then azula gets beaten in pai sho once and that’s all it takes for her to become obsessed with sokka and convinced that they are the real soulmates. sokka didn’t account for this happening because he assumed that pai sho is a meaningless game and nothing would happen if he won. he kicks himself for this later. 

mai and azula both agree to tell toph and sokka that there’s been a mistake, and they try to inform them of this theory as directly as possible. toph and sokka are like “what are you talking about?? the system would never do such a thing??? the system doesnt make mistakes!!!” and they even threaten to tell michael about this before mai and azula are like “ok ok !!! maybe we were wrong. just an idea” and sokka’s like “ok well maybe we shouldn’t be questioning this perfect world, how’s that for an idea. oh and im in love with toph” and mai and azula leave deeply heartbroken. sokka and toph are like “whew that was close” because there is no fucking way they are splitting up after they’ve spent who knows how long perfectly camouflaging under surveillance and pretending to be having sex while actually doing very long and complicated math and reading through everything every moral philosopher ever wrote up until the day they died and throwing out more and more implausible theories just for sokka to have to pretend to be attracted to azula. toph’s like “i kinda like mai tho” and sokka’s like “yeah mai’s chill” 

at first, zuko and katara get along great! they love doing dumb shit together that no one else they knew on earth ever found fun. they have such deep, profound conversations all the time. they’re always cuddling while watching movies and they’re like yeah we real cute. for the first time in both their lives they’re like, wow!! maybe soulmates are real!! all their friends are like “awww you two are so perfect together. and you always have your hands all over each other. you guys must be forkin like crazy” and they’re like “haha! ..........yep!” it’s only just occurred to them that it’s been six months and they still haven’t even kissed. and katara’s like “okay clearly we just....forgot! and we should just do that now, because we’re in ....love? unless..... you don’t want to....” and zuko’s like “HAHA WHAT WHY WOULDNT I WANT TO” the next morning they both are like “well that was great!” and are terrified to tell the other that they currently feel dead inside. after that, they stop having deep conversations. they stop cuddling on the couch. mainly, they just lie to each other so often that the smallest thing will leave them boiling over in a ginormous fight. and when they fight, the entire city knows it, because they are so. goddamn. loud. but then when people ask them how they’re doing katara’s just like “oh we couldnt be more in love :) .....why do you ask?” 

after aang’s house gets destroyed in a fire zuko may or may not have started, he feels so guilty he lets aang move into their gaudy mansion with a billion spare bedrooms. aang promises he’ll only be there until they’re done with renovations to his old home, but none of them bother to question why they need to be doing renovations in the good place anyway. zuko is constantly doubting his place in this world, and whether he even is katara’s soulmate. the people around him keep telling him he’s a good person, but then something horrible will happen that he’s certain was his fault, and he’s like “aah im a fraud!” plus, aang seems to understand katara so much better, and they have a really strong bond... if he can be here, he doesn’t understand why aang and katara can’t be true soulmates. and aang agrees. 

azula’s breakdowns get worse and worse each time, and she feels so alone. she knows that mai doesn’t love her. she knows that sokka doesn’t love her. her mom didn’t even love her! of course she wouldn’t get a soulmate –– what a childish, naive, foolish, idiotic notion!!!! so she decides to do the right thing, and confess: she was put here by mistake. she is the problem with the neighborhood. she’s not supposed to be here. sokka’s like “okay well fork. why did i ever ever beat her in pai sho” (and he’s right to think that, frankly.) there are proceedings in which azula must admit to michael that she was never a human rights lawyer, but she was an attorney. mainly she got people prosecuted for drug possession. it’s a living! ha ha...! they go through a whole bunch of bullshirt, but it all comes to a head when they’re fighting over who should take azula and zuko’s places (he confesses too, obvs) when it occurs to zuko that they can’t go to the bad place. because they’re already in the bad place. 

sokka’s like “whaaaaaaat???? no...........thats ... thats impossible! why would you..............say that.................. you........forking...................idiot...............” (so much work. so much work wasted. fuck this dude. if he weren’t already dead sokka would kill him.) but michael’s already like “wow someone finally figured it out. i thought you’d never get it.” and then goes on to explain his great master plan that was actually a lot less complex than sokka’s current working theory. he leaves the room to talk to sean, and sokka’s like “okay show of hands who knew” so turns out ty lee and suki knew as well. good to know. with double the people with brains, maybe they can devise a plan to escape. and leave the rest to die or whatever. mainly zuko though. especially zuko. sokka writes down a note to find toph, ty lee, suki, and mai in the next reboot and under it, the sentence: “stay calm; you’re in the bad place.” 

and then nbc cancels it because they have the foresight to know that the concept won’t sustain itself :) 

[notokj]

my coming out story (i guess)

Warning - This is probably going to be long and boring, but it’s my truth. And I guess I should start off with a disclaimer.

I am not a lesbian. I am bisexual.

My name is KJ, I’m currently 18 years old and I live a relatively happy lifestyle. From a very young age, I’d been attracted to boys. Specifically (but not exclusively) Robert Downey Jr., Nick Jonas, Chris Evans, Chris Hemsworth, Brenden Urie, and various others. I always thought girls were pretty, but I never let myself think anything further. In the early 2000s, sure, being ‘out’ was slowly becoming normal, but I was a kid and nobody my age was talking about it... so why should I? I had a mom and dad, and so did my friends, I didn’t even consider two moms or two dads or anything in between. I was completely in the dark. But for hours, I would obsess over Miley Cyrus (or Hannah Montana) not just as a TV celebrity, but as somebody I found attractive. I never felt scared to admit this out loud, simply because I believed that I was just being stupid or irrational. I let myself continue to fit in the way I did.

One of the earliest memories I remember about me trying to shut down my feelings was about in the third grade. There was an exchange student from the middle east who was just learning English, and for whatever reason they chose me to help her understand that seasons. You know, fall, winter, spring, summer, it was fine. We were having fun like most little kids do, even with the language barrier. She was having issues understanding what the different words meant, and I was having issues explaining it to her because I couldn’t communicate in a way that she would understand. Giving up on the seasons, she took notice to my disney princess lunchbox. I told her my favorite princess was Ariel, and I’m not sure if I misspoke or she misunderstood but she stated that she “wanted to kiss a princess”. Now, I cannot confirm if that was her true feeling at the time or if she was unable to translate correctly what she said, but I was shocked to hear her say it. I didn’t comment on it, I didn’t make her uncomfortable, I simply moved on and pointed out all of the princesses on my bag. After school that day, I was hanging out with a family friend that was a couple years older than me. Being confused and trusting this friend, I told them what the exchange student said. My friend proceeded to tell me that I was lying, that a girl would never say that, and I laughed it off and agreed with her and told her the girl was probably just crazy. I quickly regretted my words, but kept all my opinions to myself. I didn’t want to seem weird or out of it.

Fast forward to the seventh grade, I had just transferred to a new middle school and was enjoying my time meeting new friends. At this time, it was super cool to girls if a guy was gay, but lesbians were unheard of. In my friend group, there was this one girl, let’s call her Brooke. Brooke was broken up with her asshole ex-boyfriend when we met, and shortly after she admitted to me that she had feelings for another girl. Of course, knowing somebody who had positive thoughts about girls liking girls, I fully supported her. I even helped her to portray her feelings. During this time, I hadn’t outed myself, but I was able to confirm that I did like girls... all because Brooke did it first. Somebody I trusted was brave enough, even though nearly half of her family was homophobic, she was able to say out loud that she liked somebody of the same sex. I respected her for that. We became best friends through that experience. It was special to me, and in eight grade I admitted to my entire group of friends that I liked girls and boys, They all supported me but I hadn’t yet been out to my family.

Two weeks before high school, Brooke had a birthday party. I went, of course, and at a point in the night, a kissing game was played... and, well, I lost my first kiss to Brooke. Do I regret it? No. Was it kinda cringy and gross? Yes, as most fourteen year old kisses were. I immediately knew everything I was feeling was real, and all I wanted to do was give Brooke a chance. I had known for a while that Brooke had feelings for me, and I was starting to have feelings for her. During her party, she claimed that on the first day of high school, she would get down on one knee and ask me out in front of everyone. That was said as a joke, but slick little KJ took advantage of it. Right before I left the party, I whispered into her ear “Why wait until school starts, when I’m saying yes right now?”, THEN I RAN OUT! I ran out like a little pussy but it’s okay! She texted me later that night and asked if I was kidding. I said no. Feelings from both sides were admitted and we confirmed that we were now girlfriend and girlfriend.

Three months later, me and Brooke are still together. Since we started High School as a couple, it was really easy to transition into the culture of our school. We didn’t have to come out to our classmates, because everyone had already assumed we were out. It was okay! Sure, there were “Fag”s and “Dyke”s thrown around, constant mocking and teasing, but we were strong. We didn’t let it get to us and we stuck together. I was at the point where I realized I was falling in love with this girl. I decided to tell my mom. At this point in time, my parents had recently divorced and weren’t living together anymore. I primarily lived with my mom, and I wanted to open up to her about this part of my life. So, I did. She was upset that I hid it from her for three months, but she was happy for me and also confessed that she too was/is bisexual! I’ve never felt so much comfort and security in my life.

But wait, this isn’t a cute happy coming out story that will end up on facebook.

The next hurdle was telling my dad. He’s always been a bit old school and traditional, and both my mom and I KNEW he would not be happy about it. He’d never really liked my friend group, specifically Brooke, and I just knew that being bisexual was not going to be a good thing. Also, knowing my dad, because I was dating a girl, I’d have to come out to him as a lesbian. He was the kind of old school that didn’t believe you could like both. Whatever, I just wanted to tell him. For some reason, this really stressed me out because I wanted nothing more than to be supported by my dad. I had gotten to such a low point, and mixed with high anxiety and depression, I made the mistake of cutting myself (take note it was the first and last time. I’m proudly four years clean). I’d worn a heavy red sweater the day after to hide it, and stupid me wrote my girlfriend a note about what I did because I wanted to be honest. The note got dropped somewhere, and I was reported to the office. The counselor checked my arm, and I swore it was just marks from falling into a bush. I caved, though, called my mom and told her what I did. My mom picked me up from school, and took my home. She stood out on the porch and told my dad what I did and how I did it. He was so angry, he left right away... After that, everyone acted like nothing happened. Nobody asked about me, my feelings, or Brooke. It was uncomfortably normal.

Shortly after, it was my fifteenth birthday. Being a latina, this was a big deal. I had a quinceanera! It was beautiful, Phantom of the Opera themed. I had fifteen roses, and I handed each one to an important person in my life and also gave them a speech. One of those roses went to my girlfriend, of course. But I was very courteous of my dad, and kept the speech platonic. As the night went on, my dad lingered and I had just wanted to apologize to Brooke for not spending much time with her. so I pulled her into the bathroom and we talked. She was okay so we both exited but my dad caught us as I was leaving. He screamed at me in front of everyone and made me cry, all for being with Brooke alone. He got so angry, he left and went drinking. I was miserable.

We talked after that. I told him I liked girls and boys. He told me he felt as if I was pressuring myself into some new societal norm, and that he specifically did not like Brooke. I was hurt, but I knew it would heal with time. And you know what? It did.

Three years later, Brooke left me for reasons not worth putting into a story like this. I was crushed. She was my first love, but I knew it was not meant to be. My dad and I were able to talk without her weight on my shoulders, and he had changed his mindset after years of watching me grow. He’ll never be the dad that’s going to gawk at girls with me, he wasn’t raised that way and I respect that. But he’ll never be the dad that puts me down if I do end up with a woman. I’m proud to say my dad is fully supportive of me, as long as I’m happy and safe. So many people are quick to judge him on the first half of this story, but family to recognize how far he’s come in loving me for me. I trust him with anything now. And having listened to why he didn’t like Brooke, made me realize that his previous anger was not completely directed at my newfound sexuality. He didn’t like how I was treated, not the gender of who I was with. He changed, for my happiness. And he is one of my biggest supporters now.

After Brooke, I had two other partners, both boys. I was the talk of my school. People would say that Brooke was just a phase, and that I faked being gay, and that I was just some phony. Both of those relationships didn’t last, and it was just six months ago that I decided I wouldn’t date until college because I was so put off by all the rude comments. Nobody wanted to believe that I was bisexual. They all wanted to believe that I was straight, or just a weird lesbian. It hurt, all the biphobia. 

A month ago, let’s just simplify things and say I started dating my current boyfriend, who I’mma just call 2K here (cause thats his life smh). I am in love with 2K, and I was worried that being bisexual would be a bad thing for him but,... he does not care. He’s loyal, trustworthy, and completely supportive of the fact that while yes- we are in a straight relationship, I am still bisexual. It doesn’t bother him, and I’m lucky enough to have some wonderful friends who are also very supportive! I’m at such a good place in my life right now. 2K is on great terms with my family, I trust him more than anyone, and it’s so comforting to know that the person I love isn’t telling me that Brooke was just a phase. Christ, I was with the girl for three years. That would be a long as phase!

To this day, I still experience extreme biphobia. But you know what? I’m okay. My boyfriend, family, friends, all support me and know who I am. I am not a lesbian. I am not straight. I’m proudly bisexual! And I’m starting college in a few short months. That’s not relevant, but I’m excited. I went through highs and lows to get to this solid point, and I wouldn’t change a damn thing.

So to all of my bi friends... You are HERE. Be proud and be loud. You are not confused, and nobody has the right to make you choose who or what to love!

[joseyfeli1-blog]

This is it. Halloween 2017

So this Halloween (sadly) i will not dress up. But i will strip down, Ayyyyy!!

alright back to business. Sexuality, Identity, and least important of this bunch, Biological Sex.

This post is for my blog and to be written down. I am still closeted, which i only will tell people that i believe will not care so much about this info. Serisouly in my life, it isnt a huge thing for me.

So it has come to me, throughout this year i really shouldn’t say i am cisgender, and heterosexual. And for me that was strange for me to be so okay with. Yet it wasn’t of how accepting and how much i love myself. No. it is truly cause i knew i wasn’t but never went to go check up the lgbt+ shit, and didn’t care about this stuff. But here i am, caring about myself (how do i feel about that? ehh). Sexuality was never something i cared to bring up/talk about, but Senior year (high school) and im just realizing that from past experiences that, yeah, it is more complicated than - hetero, cis. Yeah no, mostly all my lifes explanations are paragraphs, or essays. long story short, This post is really not for the people who would support me (though Thank You so much) and also not for me to accept me. Again I never cared for my sexuality and i still dont, but since i might get asked, and i would like an straight(Hah!) answer.Okay so here it is…

Identity

A big thing this is. Most explanation will be put into this (not for people to believe me, just so its written somewhere). I want to be identifyed as Genderfluid, three genders, Male, Female, and Non-Binary. For friends on here, dont worry im fine with the pronouns and or whatever you all me. I enjoy no remembering that im biologically male, but i understand people wont care for me in the future. Plus about 17 years of it, kind of numbs you to caring about the pronoun game. So why identify as genderfluid and not be cisgendered? Well for me i am self aware that i depreciate myself (all the fucking time) and some part of it was, so i mustnt hate myself enough to realise i should accept the idea of me being identified as the other two genders. So i thought about, i hate most masculine shit. feminine shit? Love a lot of it! Shit with no gender?  Cool as fuck. So why be filtered Josey? why not embrace this threepeice mofo? 

Why do i believe myself to be these genders?/ Why identify as them?

picture a triple Venn diagram please? Male, Female, Non-Binary.

Why male? i WILL NOT degrade the beauty of the other two genders to have me as a full addition. (self-depreciation, i know, again self aware af) 

Why Female? They all are strong as H E L L! to be apart of them, thats a nice thought. Plus ive had a front row seat of how most common men act towards women and i will not be apart of those asses(i am a different kind of asshole, but that is for another post, not the time right now) I never liked the way how most people talk about how lesbians are only hot and the they are sexualized, THEN! when they bring it up! everyone calls them crazy and disregards the actions of sexualizing women loving women.

Why Non-Binary? They have no need for being either common gender, Awesome! in my opinion. The fact that i never cared for my gender  through my young life, speaks out to me, not loudly, but i know i barely care for the thing in between my pants, regardless my bio sex. In fact, i wont have memories of me being called specific pronouns and shit where i feel nostalgia over them, you wanna know why? Cause i dont remember being called a boy and enjoying it! i just remember having a great time with video games or walking around the houses ive been in.

Seriously days go by without me acknowledging that im male, so in my opinion no it doesn’t matter to me what people think of me, nor if they will support my identifications. Hence, Genderfluid, not trans, not just Non-binary. But three halves, to make a whole.

Sexuality

Alright the simpler part of this post. So when growing up, media, my family, myself, just thought it was okay for making me believe that: Yes! i am hetero! i like women! and it is okay how many are being degraded!

took me a second, but luckily i do not think that at all anymore. (for people that are going to argue me, realize that: too bad if im wrong! i aint changing this post for you!) Now sadily it took me tim eto notice how heteros i knew/ know think its fine how they think so lowly of the people they find sexually attractive, but opinions opinions! so i digress.

I am DemiPansexual (and probs demiromantic, not the time to figure that shit out yet.;p)

Demisexual- Part of the Ace spectrum, you are sexually attracted to no one other than people you have created such powerful bonds with, the immensity or lack of strong bond is obviously individual preference.

Pansexual- People sexually attracted to people whom are themselves as much as possible. See People, we dont care for biological sex, identity, or sexual orientation of whomever we feel attracted to sexually. Again personal reference is what you are looking towards other people (or yourself? who nows? some freaky narcissistics out there, @rapforeminem im looking at You!:p). For me, people being themselves the most, and me seeing them sexually attractive because of it- That (again for me) is someone living their life where they cant stop learning themselves and aspiring to be themselves as we all know, we gonna die soon. the fact is (in my opinion), People dont change, they adapt and grow. They become what their soul is. i believe that souls know what we will become, hopes that we discover all 100% of ourselves, i pray to know all of me, but im also scared, so i will not try to really go out for the answer, if it happens, it happens, and cool too. To see someone be themselves and embrace it, brightens my mood. seeing their bright eyes, makes me bite my lip (like a loser and/or fangirl, lol), it makes me feel good/ special to be there for it. it is special and sweet. anyhow, i hate seeing people as sexual objects, i know i very much did before, but for me, it was normalized! for me! i am justifying me right now, im justifying when i didn’t know that was not how i like to think and act.

DemiPansexual- So why use both? Well, i shouldn’t call myself/ use the ace spectrum to use for myself, again big respect for each one of them, because  i have seen people that i didn’t have/ picture of having a profound bond with. And I love the soul of others, they’re so pretty! Especially when they are really unfiltered.

now because i am pansexual, doesn’t mean i have to seek out the entire soul of another to be even a tiny bit sexually attracted to them. That is my opinion. This Whole Fucking post is my god damned opinion, why type and post it? it will give me god damn peace broham. having something written, helps me cope, so in a sense, this helps me be me, acceot myself and my complicated sexuality/identity.

So for people whom talk, or want to talk to me (there is no line for that), and dont know how to talk to me aafter i come out, just notice, i never really talked about myself in these ways before! i never really cared, i am numb to how poeple just saw a straight regular boi. GOD do i wish it was that simple, literally over an hour typing this shit! But of course to end it,

Biological sex

i am boi

Alright that is it! Hahaha, okay so this is going out at 2:00 am in texas time, but 12:00am (Halloween) for westcoast of the united states. ill reblog during the day of Halloween. not to advertise myself, but for people that want a coming out post, and or support me no matter what (thank you again, love you lot) i identify as.

Oh and i understand that there are so many! so many spectrums and other shit, so if you read all this, or just feel like im incorrect and ou are in fact more intelligent in this subject than me and try to tell me “that i am actually something else”, or “there is a better title for you” i wont listen right now, im fucking exhuasted okaying this post as is, ill check on myself and the wikipedia if I feel the need to. And if you do not beileive or disagree with any part of my coming out shtuff, talk to me directly, no need to hurt my supporters, followers, people i follow, random Tumblr users, and especially mutuals( I Love you guys! MWAH!). Message ME that im wrong or dont exist! not the people that had no idea this post was being done! give me your hate! im cool with it! I Will allow it!

Anyway! Happy mother fucking Halloween California! Have a safe and fun one this year! and everywhere else for that matter. 

[gayregis]

OK first episode reactions

OHHH that was THE KIKIMORE............... im glad we get to see the fight because i mean. i would want some money for doing that crazy shit too. also you noticed how he killed the deer because he was probably starving. 

the moment of hesitation before he enters the tavern......... OK... [jaskier or yennefer voice] dont you just wanna stroke his gross dirty white hair

wait the uhhhh... “tavern scene” occurs in the witcher right, so i dont have to be scared bc this is the lesser evil, right, right, maybe not, idk what theyre switching around

the fucking cease of noise as geralt walks in.... the MOOD

cavill is like way too fine to be playing geralt rn i mean this shot where he says point me to the aldermans house is really showing off his profile. i feel sympathetic for this pretty pretty man

oh im regretting not rereading the lesser evil right now. i cant remember WHAT the fuck happens in that story. he goes to stregobor first though right??? right? he meets with the alderman and the dude’s like nah you cant get shit for that kikimore head, but maybe this wizard will give ya smth

my lesbianisms thinking renfri is pretty VS my morality knowing what shes like VS my witcher fan knowing what the hell happens in this story.... fight

WHY DID YOU HAVE TO MAKE RENFRI SO PRETTY!!!!!!! shes SO pretty and cute..... yall are making me like her fuck you fuck you SO hard.

the voice acting is sending me kind of... this is actually a good geralt voice imo if you dont mind me saying that. i still prefer polish tw3 dub but this is actually better than fuckin delvin mallory in the audiobooks. no disrespect, peter kenny, you did dandelion and yennefer and the hansa well, but geralt..... hm....

okay jk actually i need more geralt lines in order to develop my thoughts on his voice. ill wait until edge of the world where he SHOULD be more talkative

are we really going to stregobor’s fucking tower where a naked woman illusion waits on him and he offers to give geralt a go at this basically fuck doll illusion

“where are you from, geralt?” “rivia.” SURE.... YOU LIAR...... liar .... just WAIT until baptism of fire oooohhh just you wait

also this girl marilka is so sweet, also makes me think because milva said she was called that by some. but thats why she changed her name to milva

“because girls cant be witchers right” OK you reminded me 50% of ciri but now youre literally just proto-ciri

oh.... no foolery with the magic door knocker?

YEP I WAS RIGHT WE GOT NAKED LADIES!

wow this exactly what i pictured the inside of stregobor’s tower to be like lmaooo

WHY DOESNT GERALT KNOW STREGOBOR???????

oh its so weird to see ciri like. like old at cintra you know what im saying . like im like wait wait how is she alive if geralt hasnt been there as ravix yet. not BAD just weird for me

“speak normally” this reminds me of in bounds of reason dandelions like should i give the account in verse or in prose and then he starts speaking with the most flowery prose and geralts like PROSE prose please

“if you had been alive during falkas rebellion” please dont mention falka already we’re moving too fast soon enough leo fucking bonhart will be at our heels!

“and she possesses the power to destroy us all” “i dont believe anyone has that power.” WAIT UNTIL YOU MEET YOUR DAUGHTER DUDE LOL

wow he’s really full body dressed in black leather. huh . and people say hes heterosexual fml

okay i thought them calling the girls “girl” was kinda tender in the series but now its even more tender when heard aloud.

eist is like really present here and i like him enough its just that calanthe was like way more important than him in the series though right

“it needs to rhyme” and “pretty ballads hide bastard truths” so are we really just stealing every clever word that jaskier can say before he even comes into it

LOL CIRI LESBIAN LIKE WE DIDNT EVEN HAVE TO GET TO ANY OF THE OTHER BOOKS..... she said BEGONE HET!

OH I LOVE HOW THEY CONTEXTUALIZE IT SO WE KNOW THIS SHIT IS TAKING PLACE IN THE PAST..... WOW GERALT IS OLD AS HELL LMAOOOOOOOOOOOO  calanthe was like 14 then right so LOLLLL GERALTS OLD AND TIRED lol

me: is a regis fan / also me: GERALT IS A SHITTY OLD BITCH LMAOO

uh oh spaghettios! its nilfgaard and one of their fun funky officers, son of ceallach! i havent seen him yet but im terrified anyways!

okay see this is how you do a  PROPER adaptation. calanthe in the books committed suicide so she wouldnt be r*ped right as she sat in a stupid castle but this calanthe is on the fucking battlefield. this is why we stan middle aged women

eist: [dies] me: AAAAAA cahir: [is there Waiting] (i think its him maybe) me: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ah fuck ah fuck fuck

ciri: why [is nilfgaard attacking] ? calanthe knowing DAMN WELL stupid fucking duny is her dad: uhHHhhHhH idk lol

“you will rule this land someday” nope again! [thinks about lady of the lake] nope and nope!

ciri’s “are you dying?” to calanthe on her deathbed is the new “was he human” yennefer asking if regis (as a giant fucking bat) was human

i love how looongggg these episodes areee omgg

but also i always thought of the fall of cintra as something you know like. it happened in two shakes, cahir kinda just took ciri up by her underarms (like longcat) and left

OHHHH THEY IMPROVED THIS SCENE SO MUCH I WAS HOPING WE’D GET THIS OMG OMG BUT INSTEAD OF TELLING SOME YOUNG GIRL WHICH HAD WEIRD KINDA GROSS CHEMISTRY WITH HIM ROAVCH GETS TO HEAR IT!!! THIS IS HOW YOU DO AN ADAPTATION YAYY

renfri: who were you talking to? geralt: .. my horse.......... all of the fans: [dialing 1-800-TROUBADOUR immediately]

ugh i really thought they were gonna adapt the sex between renfri and geralt out. ugh ugh . too much heterosexuality

WHOA. HOLD THE FUCK UP. HOLD> HE FUCK UP. CALANTHE ADVISED CIRI TO TAKE MERCY. THATS LITERALLY FORESHADOWING FOR WHEN SHE CHOOSES NOT TO SLAY CAHIR AT THANEDD. WOW. WHAT THE FUCK WOW. WOW’

ciri you are gonna regret stalling so hard when mr. ceallach marches in. just saying. RUN.

CAHIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRR I ALMOST SCREAMED AND TORE MY STITCHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

uh.... ok...................... hm not what happened in the books.... where ciri is shot off in the midst of battle and crawls up next to a dead man and acts dead ........ lol cahir is even more evil now how is this possible i didnt think he could get MORE evil

[cahir voice] he deflected the arrow with his sword! ive never seen anything like it!

also have i said already that the cinematography is amazing. like the room where calanthe was on her deathbed.... that renfri dream was pretty cool too... just a lot of things are very pleasing to the eye

due to a injury in the carotid artery blood would be gushing everywhere. also is she prophecizing ciri? stop this there are already so many women in the witcher universe that give prophecy. theres like the girl in baptism of fire, ciri, everyone in ciri’s bloodline, and now renfri?

LOOOOLLLL THE HORSE

cahir: nice, GG guys, im gonna go get that cool promotion now, this will be epic, my mom will be SO proud of me-- ciri: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA cahir: OH FUUUUCKKK

well that’s MUCH MORE of a report to file with your superior officers! “yeah so the girl fucking opened up a hole in the earth” instead of “ahh idk i fell asleep and when i woke up she wasnt there :/” .... cahir really is not getting that promotion now, huh

okay yall can say whatever you want about cavill as geralt but when he said “do not touch her” and moved his mouth like that? oh geraltisms.

this is a really nice episode i like how it just went into the action i wasnt convinced at first but ah this is quite nice. i like how it has JUST geralt and ciri in it and later yennefer will come in as her mom. renfri prophecizing was actually pretty ok, at first i thought i wouldnt like the change, but it makes it easier to digest for television. i like how they really emphasize that geralt is hated to all hell, and that ciri is powerful yet still babie. this is a good portrayal of both of them in these stages of their lives you know what im saying. also is cahir gonna chase ciri now for those Good Boy Black Rider points? bc there were shots of him in a forest. ah well whatever lets move to the next episode

[thehumorousace]

My Asexual Story

Just wanted to share my story about being Asexual because i’ve never actually told anyone before and i don’t have anyone in person to tell, plus i need to get this off my chest because it’s something i’ve been keeping to myself, so don’t feel as if you have to read, i’m just having a moment here.

So basically around the age of 14/15 i realised i didn’t have sexual attractions towards people (Boys, girls or anyone in between) but at this point i didn’t know about the term ‘asexual’ and i especially didn’t realise that other people experienced this kinda thing, so i went a bit crazy thinking that i’d never find anyone and that i only had a couple months left to get in a relationship with someone and that even if i did get into a relationship i would only be with them for a short time coz, according to me, after the age of 16 people would just want sex in a relationship and there would be no hope for a weirdo like me who wasn't into that. I don’t know why i thought this but i was 15 and a mess of a human being. I do however recall the main source of why i thought this was the case was because prom was coming up (I’m British so we leave secondary school at 16 and have a prom) and in a lot of films thats the kinda time people do the nasty, on top of this i guess i just got it in my head that like what else is gunna happen between a girl and guy after a big fancy party, once again i was 15 and out of my mind and i now know this isn't necessarily the case. So during this time i went through all sorts of scenarios, at first i thought i was lesbian because i wasn't attracted to guys so i must have been attracted to girls, right? But no, that thought process lasted like a day and i went back to thinking i was just crazy and would die alone with my 50 cats, i also wondered that maybe i was ‘normal’ and i did have these sexual feelings and maybe didn’t realise them but after talking to some people i realised this was also not the case as just the way they described certain feelings weren't anything i'd ever felt and were something i honestly never wanted to experience.

Then around the time i turned 16 (March - so prom was still relatively far away but all the plans had been made and people had dates and stuff) i some how decided to look up the LGBT+ community and all the different types of sexualities and genders, i don’t 100% remember why, i think i was kinda looking for other sexualities that i might have been coz at the time i only knew to be hetrosexual, homosexual or bisexual so maybe i was looking for the right label as i knew there were other 'types' of orientation out there. I came across this list of a huge range of sexualities, orientations, genders ect. and seeing as Asexual begins with ‘A’ it was at the top of the list, the description for each definition was only brief and you could click to get more info, but the description for the first sexuality was something like ‘Someone who doesn’t experience sexual attraction’ (I know this is very brief and not 100% correct for everyone but like i said u could get more info and all the mini definitions were like 10 words long). So 16 year old me saw, by pure chance and thanks to the spelling of this word, this definition that matched me. I cannot explain the feeling that went through me in that exact moment, shock, excitement, disbelief. All i know is that i practically did a double take and i clicked on that link faster than i have clicked on anything before in my entire life and for the next 2-3 hours i read that page over and over to make sure i understood it all right, i read page after page on all different websites to make sure i was understanding it right and by the end of it i finally felt like by me just identifying with this label that i was somehow more okay, I know some people don’t like giving themselves labels as it can make them feel restricted (or for any other reasons - idk it’s an individual thing i guess), but for me personally that label made me feel like i wasn’t alone and that i wasn’t crazy for feeling the way i did and thats what i needed, i needed an explanation and thats what this one word did, it didn’t make me feel validated or give my life meaning it just gave me an reasonable explanation and the knowledge that i wasn’t alone. I never told anyone about this whole thing as i don’t think i was 100% convinced and i carried on researching asexuality to make sure i did have it all right because i didn’t want to say i was this sexuality and for someone to be like ‘um actually you’re *this*, not asexual’. I also made the decision not to go to prom, my friendship group were all going together and they'd asked me to go but the whole thing just wasn't me, due to me having anxiety and hating the idea of human contact (Which to my understanding is being touch repulsed? A new term i've recent heard some people use in the asexual/aromantic community) a big crowded room full of people i didn't like was my worst nightmare, plus i think that i still had the taught process of prom = sex at some point during the night.  

When i was 17 i ‘came out’ to someone for the first time in person. At the start she really didn’t understand it which made me feel kinda down but she listened, she didn’t tell me i was crazy or leave, she asked questions and let me explain what it all meant and how i felt.

Im now 18 and i've 'come out' to a bunch of people, pretty much everyone has had a good response but i will occasionally get the 'Oh here we go, other special snowflake' eyeroll of someone when i talk about it but i just ignore it, i can't change the way they think and if they're so close minded that they can't accept that someone thinks or feels differently to the way they do they're not worth my time and they're not going to get very far in life seeing as the world is so diverse and they're suck in the middle ages.

I have ups and downs with my sexuality all the time, when i first figured out there was something ‘different’ about me i hated it coz i thought it was some unnatural thing. But i never denied that it existed, i never tried to like the idea of sex or pretend to be something i wasn’t, i always accepted that whatever was happening wasn’t something i could change, but that didn’t mean i was okay with it. Especially around 17 i would constantly go through lows of wishing i wasn’t ‘like this’ and that because of ‘it’ i would never be able to live a ‘normal’ life. I’m someone who’s never been in a relationship before and i’m so curious about what it would like to be in one (But due to me having social anxiety and i guess me as a person i’ve never even been asked out properly before). I still fear the whole ‘dying alone with cats’ kinda thing and i do want to be in a relationship and i know not having a sexual drive will limit the amount of partners i’ll be able to find but at the end of the day what can i do about it? i can’t change myself to be some hetrosexual barbie doll, i can only be myself. So i guess as a nice message to anyone out there who is struggling with any identity issues just google it man, honestly just look up whatever it is and you might find something like i did, i didn’t have to go on any hike up a mountain and kill a mystical dragon to understand what i was going through i just had to type into google ‘List of sexualities’ and wham! i’m now a slightly smaller mess of a human being who can successfully answer the question of ‘What is your sexual orientation?’

But yeah, thats my little story of self discovery, if you did actually read this then thanks? Hope you enjoyed? Maybe I inspired you? Feel free to share your own experience (I’d honestly love to hear other people's stories)????

[strangerximagines]

The Girl

Chapter 2

Billy Hargrove snores lightly, tosses and turns before he settles and Heather has never been so annoyed in her life at a guy being in her bed. Its not the first time she’s asked a guy to stay over only to watch them slink away down the trellis at her window when the sun begins to rise, knowing that her neighbor across the street will see and gossip. It’ll get back to her mother who will then scold and ground her but thats just what Heather wants, for people to talk. Its bad enough that her mother questions and vets all of her friends, like she’s trying to find the lone lesbian that may corrupt her daughter hiding in the bunch but Heather’s smart enough to surround herself with girls who are nothing but boy crazy and a little loose. So her mother doesn’t approve of her friends but its better than her mother assuming that Heather is sneaking off with girls again.

She lightly shakes Billy’s shoulders and rolls her eyes as she kisses the shell of his ear as he wakes up. She smiles at him, mock sleepily as he sits up and looks at her, a little disoriented at first, a little confused and dustant before his eyes focus and he grins. Its fake, of course it is, he’s so used to sneaking in and out of various girls rooms that he knows how to fake it. Heather hadn’t been planning on sleeping with Billy again, she really wasn’t but her mother was starting to ask questions about Heather’s love life in a way that was anything but passing and Heather knew that she needed a cover.

“Morning already sweetheart?”

“Yeah,” She yawns. “My parents are gonna be up soon. You gotta go.”

She watches him dress, pretends that she likes what she sees and he watches her back and smiles with his mouth but not his eyes. He kisses her forhead and tells her that he’ll see her again soon and climbs out her window.

Heather throws herself back and uses a pillow to scream into she hates her life and the things that she does but she doesn’t exactly hate Billy Hargrove. Thats the werid thing. She’d mentioned it to Johnathan before, how whenever she was with Billy that the sex was of course lacking it wasn’t something that she was into but that somehow she didn’t think Billy liked it much either. It was perfunctory, the way he touched her and kissed her with minimal effort or care, like he wasn’t in the moment with her either and it made Heather wonder why he even bothered if he wasn’t into it.

“Maybe he’s gay.” She says to herself and shrugs. Anyone else might laugh it off but maybe? She’d seen him, the way he acted, the way he overcompensated. He wore his masculinity on his sleeve, his sleaziest half lidded leer on anyone with tits, the way he carried himself around other guys trying to be the biggest and toughest.

The way he teased the pretty boys, always only the pretty ones with aggressive shoving and snarling. That was the only time any emotion hit his eyes, lit them up like blue electric fire and he glared down at them, his tongue wagging, his sharp toothed grin. He never looked so entertained when he was flirting with girls but when he was bullying the pretty boys he looked like he was having the time of his life. Steve Harrington got the worst of it for no apparent reason at all and was the source of Billy’s bullying just because he breathed.

And Steve was the prettiest.

But maybe Heather was over thinking, maybe she was hoping that she wasn’t the only one over compensating for something determined to let the word get around that she liked guys while maybe Billy did the same so that work got around that he liked girls, often.

Heather rolls to her side and decides to stop thinking about Billy Hargrove and sleep. She could bother Johnathan with her inane thoughts on it later.

————————————————————————————————

Nancy Wheeler is pretty even when she’s angry, maybe more so if the glare she shoots at Johnathan and Heather is anything to go by. They hadn’t heard her pulling up in her mothers car and of course Johnathan hadn’t locked his front door so that Heather could have time to run and hide in Will’s room either until Nancy left or shut herself in Johnathan’s room so that she could escape. Here Heather was, laying belly first on Johnathan’s bed, legs crossed behind her as Johnathan sat on the floor in front of her organizing his cassettes. It looked innocent because it was though with any girl with two brain cells and a boyfriend would be angry too, if they saw the town slut laying, however innocently, in their boyfriend’s bed especially if they didn’t know said slut and boyfriend were just friends.

Tyler, the guy Johnathan had been running around with before he and Nancy took up had also been a little weary of Heather and her reputation until he’d caught her with a girl. The college freshman was less than understanding before he’d caught her and even after that he was still weary about her. Maybe had Johnathan been gay and not bisexual he might have been a little less stressed about it but he hadn’t been. Heather wasn’t sorry to see him go but she might be sorry to see Nancy go. Johnathan hadn’t ever been so happy as he was when he was talking about Nancy.

“What the hell?” Nancy starts, her mouth opening a few more times before it clamps shut. “Johnathan?”

“Nothing happened.” He stands, slowly, hands coming up to ward off whatever blow Nancy might throw at him. “Nancy I swear.”

“Are you kidding me right now?” She points at Heather and then back at Johnathan, her blue eyes bright with anger. “Heather Holloway? Really Johnathan? If you were going to mess around with someone behind my back then you could have picked someone, anyone else with a little bit of class!”

Ouch. Heather winces but can’t fault her on it, she’s been around, a lot and often and she was laying in Nancy’s boyfriend’s bed having no idea that Heather and Johnathan were just friends. No one knew.

“Okay,” Heather sits up, a head shake and just tired. “Okay I get it. I know, its me in a guys bed which is something I’m known to do like a lot but you’ve got the wrong idea.”

“I don’t want to hear it.”

“Nancy she’s right nothing happened!”

“And I’m supposed to believe you? I’ve never seen you have a conversation with her. You don’t share any classes? So, what am I supposed to believe?”

Johnathan talked about Nancy a lot, sometimes Heather had to tell him to can it about his perfect girlfriend but most times she let him gush about his happy relationship. He’d been in love with Nancy since their little brother’s had become friends back when they were five, so thirteen years of being in love with the perfect girl and finally starting something was worth Johnathan talking about how great she was.

And now his relationship was falling apart in front of her because the town slut was caught in Nancy’s boyfriend’s bedroom, a guy said slut was never known to talk to. So Heather takes a breath, deep and hard and lets it out slow, her heart pounding as Johnathan begs and Nancy yells.

“I’m a lesbian.” She says loud enough for the fight to stop, Johnathan looks back at her wide eyed and Nancy just stops everything, stops yelling and seems to stop breathing.

Before she laughs.

“Oh thats rich. Am I supposed to believe that?” She shakes her head, eyes watery. “You expect me to believe such a transparent lie?”

“Its the truth.” Heather says. “The only person who ever knew is Johnathan okay. We hang out, like, for a while and nothing happened I swear.”

Heather’s brave to stand directly in front of Nancy, hands out trying to sound as genuine as possible. “I swear Nancy, I swear okay. He did nothing wrong he would never do that with anybody.”

“Prove it.”

——————————————

O’Rileys isnt technically a gay bar, its more a dinky dive where people drink, a hole in the wall not a lot of people know of unless they’re looking pretty specifically for something different. Johnathan found it by accident with Tyler and Heather had found it with some older woman she’d met who dragged her inside for some fun. It was two towns over from Hawkins, safe.

Nancy didn’t know where to look, there were men dancing with men, women kissing in dark corners and swaying with the music and giggling as they made their ways to the bathrooms for some fun in the stalls that were hardly ever used for anything other than screwing around.

“You guys come here?” Nancy’s voice was pinched, her face flushed a bit as Heather set a beer in front of her with a lopsided grin. Poor Johnthan sat with his shoulders hunched up, nervous, embarrassed, terrified, Heather had no clue what he was feeling.

“Yeah.” Heather settles in the booth seat across from the couple with a shrug. “We try to get here every weekend, well we did every weekend. Now its whenever we can to blow off some steam. The musics good and they don’t card.”

Nancy looks between them both befor taking her beer and chugging more than half, the bottle slamming on the table when she sets it down, confused. She turns to Johnathan who shrinks back.

“So you come here for the music?”

“Well, I do.” He says pinched, he toys at the label of his beer, tearing the moistened paper, shredding it. “Now.”

“Now? Wait-so you came here to...meet people?”

She doesn’t say guys but its implied and poor Johnathan shrinks back just a bit more, avoiding her piercing gaze. Nancy turns to Heather who shakes her head.

“I can’t tell you. For me I come here to meet women.”

“But Johnthan,” Nancy turns back to him, questioning. “You like guys?”

“Yeah,” He says low.

“Just...guys?”

Nancy looks like she’ll be the one gutted by his answer, Johnthan sees it and his whole form loosens.

“No not just guys. Nancy-“

“So you like both?”

She doesn’t look disgusted, the way that Heather thought she might knowing about the Nancy that Johnathan talks about and the Nancy that she’s seen in school Heather would have bet her lift tit that she wouldn’t be okay with dating a guy who sometimes dates other guys. Nancy looks curious, like it never occurred to her that liking both was an option but now that she knew she wanted to know everything.

“So you’ve dated guys?”

“Yeah.”

“Have you ever...you know?” She asks with a shrug eyes her more than half empty bottle and thats when Heather takes the hint.

“Let me get you another or...something stronger?”

“Stronger. For the table?”

“You got it.”

[deanandcastrash]

okay so i ranted abt homophobia under the cut so just warning you. it not anything you havent prolly heard before but im just outraged and everything has been building up latley.

im just feeling . . . angry?? confused?? there are STILL people in this world that think being gay is a choice ?? there are STILL parents who wont accept their children for being who they are??????

i have a lesbian friend who came out to her parents and her mom said, “i wish i had another kid so one day i could actually go to their wedding”

she refused to go to her kids wedding because she was marrying a girl.

this is a person who makes your daughter happy and feel loved, and yet you aren’t going to support them? WHO CARES if they are the same gender? your daughter has a serious connection with this person and because of one simple detail your whole view of your OWN DAUGHTER changes and you cant support her anymore????????

im so angry rn i cant. do. anything.

frigging because of her religion. you know how much shit the bible says???? like how much was lost through translation? i mean god didnt even write the bible, people did. and people make mistakes, just like you are right now by thinking that there is something wrong or unnatural with people who aren’t heterosexual.

i. am. outraged.

once my parents asked me why i wasnt dating anyone. i said i didnt like boys, because i dont, not meaning i like girls either, i just dont really have any romantic feelings towards and one (idk thats for another time)

and infront of my at the time ten year old brother my father asked me if i was gay. I CAN NOT EXPLAIN TO YOU HOW ANGRY I WAS.

i was like ‘if im gay i wouldnt tell you because you wouldnt accept me.’

and of course after i said that he thought i was. im not.

but i might be bisexual. i think i like people just not get too many romantic connections. at that time in my life i was deppressed for unrelated reasons.

but i WISH i could figure out what i am. i wish i could label myself so i could come out to my parents, and to my dad. I WISH their true colors would show, and that they would do something crazy, like make me move out. I WISH.

because right now im living with these awful people who think these awful things and I HATE THEM. everytime i see my friends mom know, thats what i think of her.

and honestly, its not even really cuz of her religion.

its bc she cant accept that GAY IS FUCKING OKAY GOD DAMN IT. WE ARE ALL PEOPLE, NO MATTER HOW FUCKING BIG OR SmALL OR RACE OR COLOR OF SKIN OR SEXUALITY OR WHO WERE RELATED TO.

AND I AM PISSED. I AM SO PISSED.

I LIVE IN A STATE THAT CONTINUES TO AVOID LEGALIZING SAME SEX MARRIAGE EVEN THO IT ISSSSSSSSSS LEGAL!!!!!!!

AIDGSKFKWJEHKVWNR I AM SO MAD KJWBEFKWBGFI

I JUST WANT TO SLAP EVRYONE. I WANT TO WEAR RANBOWS EVERYDAY AND INTODUCE MYSELF AS GAY AND EDUCATE PEOPLE ABOUT JESUS TO PROVE A POINT 

IM JUSTD SO MAD

[girlwithbird-blog]

When did you realise you were queer? / how, and do you have a coming out story? :)

omg hey thanks for asking!!!!! hold onto ur seat because this is gonna be a long ass story…

so here we go and its tmi and weird sexual talk ok so dont read further if that bothers you pls

i only recently came out this past december (im 21…but i did also halfway come out at 16 but i’ll get to that in a minute) as a big ol gay

but to start… i only came to terms with it 100% after the breakup with my ex boyfriend.  and i loved this guy to death, and him leaving was so incredibly painful regardless of what my sexuality is.  anyway, tmi but ive hooked up with a stupid amount of men and like a handful of ladies, i was kind of trying to like “convert” myself by getting as much peen as possible, like they could fuck the gay out of me.  and it did work for awhile.  initially, at 16, i came out as bi because my first relationship ever was with a girl.  and we were totally open at school and stuff and i never got any flack.  i told my parents and they were chill but they totally thought it was a phase, and i honestly thought it was too.  after her until i turned 21 i exclusively dated men.

i trained myself not to look at girls ~that~ way in fear id be gay.  and trust me, I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO ISSUE WITH GAYS. like, obvs its totes fine to be gay… i just didnt want to be, i wanted at least ONE aspect of me to be “normal” so i hung onto my fake heterosexuality for dear life in hopes i could fulfill my chinese side of the family’s dream of growing up and getting married to a man and owning a house and having babies.

so yes it wasnt until this past september after my breakup i started to realize things.  as much as i loved my ex, i didnt really enjoy kissing him, or sex or eveb TOUCHING him because it felt so off and bizarre but I LOVED HIM and wanted to please him so i did. and yes i did enjoy myself, but it didnt feel right. i felt like touching a penis was not right for me, at all LOL.

so anyway after that i took to the tinders and found ladies and slept with them and kissed them and everything felt so perfect and right.  i dated here and there but unfortunately they didnt wanna stay s that was upsetting but it really helped me come into my skin and realize yes its okay to like girls, its okay to me the more dominant one, its okay to be the big spoon and hold hands and piggy back them and i guess perform the traditional ~boy~ job in the relationship and it doesnt make me any less feminine. i identify as female, and i am a cisgender female, but i felt like if i was a lesbian and acted that way all of a sudden it was bad and weird ??? idk this is just my stupid logic here.

okay when i came out i was accidentally outed by my sister LOOOL she totally didnt mean to. but i was at my aunts house with my uncle, sister and mom.  and we were talking about tinder and she was like “oh raven matched with my friend madison from school and they should totally go out” and my relatives and mom got a puzzled look on their face and i was like fuck and my sister told me after she was gonna try and salvage the situation and i basically was like ya im gay…. and then i was met with silence. and then “really?… this isnt one of your crazy ideas is it” ok apparently i have ideas that are crazy and fleeting but YA HAHAHA IM JUST GONNA CHOOSE TO BE GAY RN and im like no ive known for awhile. honestly, probs since i was 13 but it took eight years to figure it out. and then they all sat there in silence, and i cried because i was so scared. but all of them were like omg no dont cry its fine!!!! and they all hugged me and were supportive and now suggest cute girls for me to date instead of cute boys. so tis all good!!!

sorry this was long and all over the place but yay thats my story!!!