I need to vent, so it might trigger some people.
You might not know, but I work as a Elementary school teacher.
I'm mentally end physically exhausted, I don't know how much I can endure teaching kid's. To be honest, I can't even teach them anything, because they don't want to obey me and do anything. If I tell them to sit down and do the activities, the boy's in most part just tell me to shut up, and call me a whore or a bitch. And they are 6!
If I speak louder to them, or try to reprehend the kid's, the next day their mom's show on school to scream at me, because I can't talk like that to their children, because it will traumatize them for life. But when I ask the same mothers to come to school because their precious little angel insulted me, or hurt another children, then they don't come. Not even care.
Other thing that I'm seeing happening, is little boy's sexually assaulting female teachers. But if we say anything to the mothers, all they say is "he is a child and don't know what he is doing", or the worst thing I have heard yet "but my son does this because he is autistic". Like????
Seriously, parents, especially mothers, need to stop neglecting and pushing to school the job to educate their children!
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I wish I had a click remote
I would love to just press pause and do the things I would like to do. Or even the things I don't, just because then I'll have time to do them.
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What was the point of waking up today, like holy SHIT man
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Had a wild night where I kinda mentioned top surgery in a kinda general way but the other person caught on immediately. It was cool, he was a cool guy. He suggested a mens group that meets all over the world if I was interested. It. Was nice.
I've just been so filled with Thoughts since then. I dont feel masculine enough. I haven't even started hrt. I feel like a fraud having not started yet and still using a feminine name and sounding feminine. I know every argument against this but none ever apply to me, in my head.
I'm a bit more determined to start hrt. I have been kinda pushing it as "next time I talk to my therapist" but I now made the appointment. I kinda made the decision to move ahead with it since my boyfriend said he'll just see how it goes since he was sure he wouldn't be interested in a relationship anyways. I had the same idea of "just see how you feel about it" but I'm not holding on to too much hope. Whatever, his family wouldn't be fun to deal with anyways.
I just don't know.
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I'm an "AroAce Stereotype"
I'm Romance averse/Repulsed>
I'm Sex repulsed
I'm non-partnering
I hate the idea of marriage in all forms
I don't want a QPR at all
I'm loveless
I'm someone who gets uncomfortable at sexual talk and sex jokes
I'm someone who often has innuendos or sexual concept fly over my head.
I'm someone who can't tell when someone is flirting with me
I'm someone who can't pick up on romantic or sexual tension
I'm someone who finds "shipping" to be annoying
I'm someone who says "They just seem like friends to me"
I'm someone who believed that attraction could be turned on or off
I'm someone who can't make sense of romance at all and cant figure out what makes it different from every other relationship.
I'm someone who thinks romance is stupid and sex is gross and I don't understand the big deal everyone makes about it
I'm someone who never was upset to find out I was AroAce but rather relieved as I have a genuine fear of being stuck in a romantic relationship that i do not want.
In all cases I am not an AroAce who can be considered "normal" by the standards of allo society.
I'm not just a stereotype for you to shit on.
I'm not the reason aphobes are aphobic
I'm not a problem that you need to erase and refute to be accepted by allos.
I'm not an experience that you and ignore as "not really how aspec people are" just because You are not part of it.
Stop leaving us behind. Stop throwing us under the bus. We deserve support too. We deserve to not be demonized and shunned because we're an "stereotype". We are not the problem. We are not a problem to be fixed. start fighting aphobes on their logic instead of trying to make up for our existence.
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the problem with getting attention for your social cause by trying to make a trend about it is that inevitably the trend overtakes the cause, gutting any actual support for it. you've seen it happen a million times. the ALS ice bucket challenge. social media "blackouts" against police brutality. orange shirt day for MMIW/Res School awareness. trendifying your cause defangs it. And that's kind of the point, I think. We're more than willing to hand over the real, tangible political power we hold as citizens so long as we are promised entertainment. people love to compare US politics to reality TV, but I don't think they get just how on the nose they are. Domestic politics don't actually matter to those the establishment is trying to cater to. Going to vote isn't political action for white USAmericans: it's entertainment. I believe that perhaps its time to update the old adage about bread and circuses; USAmericans have proven they'll gladly foresake even bread in the name of more circuses.
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In theory i like the idea that rick is growing and developing as a person. In practice it ends up falling short though, because no one balances him out. rick is getting better while no one else is getting worse, and it causes the whole thing to end up feeling a bit stale. The biggest draw, at least for me, has always been rick and morty's shitty dynamic, but it barely exists anymore because rick has been so watered down.
The ideal solution is literally just to make morty into a bigger asshole. Essentially flipping the main characters' personalities would offer a wide variety of conflict into the show, and would also help keep it "fresh".
Instead it feels the writers are pretending that they can't possibly do anything with morty's character, that they have to keep him the same anxious idiot he was in season one. I've said this before, but it's incredibly frustrating to watch the show have no problem with expanding rick's character while struggling with keeping morty's heavily stagnated characterization consistent. Where rick has space to develop between multiple seasons, morty is constantly forced into one of two boxes (smart/stupid) depending on the episode.
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