#incorrect sephiroth quotes

[hecate-valentine]

This is a chronic illness

[superespresso]

Hi I made more.

[little-black-dress-zack-fair]

Cloud: I’m gonna kill you!

Sephiroth: Oh really? How original. I’ve died so many times my gravestone says BRB instead of RIP on it.

[incorrect-strife-quotes]

Cloud: You expect me to stop her?

Sephiroth: Isn’t she your teammate?

Cloud: Aerith is her own woman.

Cloud: And I really want to see you get hit with a chair.

[anakinh]

endless ffvii → (29/∞): crisis core incorrect quotes edition

[incorrectsmashbrosquotes]

*the smashers are chilling and vibing when Wario comes running into the room*

Wario: HAVE YOU GUYS SEEN WAPEACH?!

Samus: ...Have we seen fucking what?

Wario: WAPEACH! The evil version of Peach!

Link: I thought Daisy was the evil version of Peach.

Daisy, cleaning her shotgun: A common misconception.

Wario: Well, she got out, stabbed Waluigi in the kidney and now she's on the loose!

Ridley: HAH! Loser.

Sephiroth: If you really want our help then- huh-

*Sephiroth collapses. Wapeach stands behind him with a bloody knife. She has stabbed him in the kidney as well*

*Wapeach runs off as chaos interrupts*

Ridley, cradling Sephiroth: We gotta get him to a doctor!

Dr. Mario: Have you seen his biology?! Get him to Area 51!

[ffvii-series-incorrect-quotes]

[preposterousgreen]

Sephiroth: Fun fact! Fire alarms tend to give low-battery warning beeps in the middle of the night because the fall in ambient temperature causes the voltage from the battery to drop below the threshold.

Angeal: Sephiroth, listen to me very carefully.

Angeal: It is 2:30 a.m.

Angeal: Masamune is the only object on this floor long enough to reach that fucking thing.

Angeal: If you stop yapping about the ambient temperature and give it to me now, I won't crush you like a bug.

[strayheartless]

Cloud: who broke it?

*guilty silence*

Cloud: I’m not mad I just want to know.

Angeal: it was me I bro-

Cloud: No, no you didn’t. Zack?

Zack: Don’t look at me, look at Kunsel!

Kunsel: What I didn’t brake it!

Zack: huh, that’s weird. How’d you even know it was broken?

Kunsel: because it’s sitting right in front of us, and it’s broken!

Zack: suspicious.

Kunsel: no it’s not!

Roche: if it matters, probably not, but Genesis was the last one to use it…

Genesis: lier! I don’t even drink that crap!

Roche: oh really, well what were you doing over by the coffee cart earlier?

Genesis: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles, everyone knows that cockroche!

Angeal: okay, okay, let’s not fight! I broke it let me pay for it Cloud!

Cloud: No, who broke it!

Zack: Cloudy? Sephiroth has been awfully quiet…

Sephiroth: REALLY?! Oh my goddess, you’re really going to call it like that huh?

*they all continue fighting for an hour*

Lazard: so who broke it? Did you find out?

Cloud: oh, I did.

Lazard: …???

Cloud: it burned my hand so I punched it.☺️

[hecate-valentine]

has this been done yet?

[superespresso]

I really don't think y'all understand how quick into shitpost territory my brain goes seeing literally any text posts. Also I'm sorry for the last one.

[little-black-dress-zack-fair]

Zack: You know that feeling where your heart skips a beat?

Sephiroth: That’s called arrhythmia.

Zack: I get that feeling every time I see y—

Sephiroth: *now very concerned* You can die from it.

[errantnight]

[icycoldninja]

FFVII incorrect quotes

Cloud: You know, I used to play back in my gory days. Tifa: You mean glory days? Cloud: Ah, that too.

Barret: A stake to the heart won't kill a vampire if their tits are big enough. Aerith : Yeah, you just catch it. Tifa: Nah nah nah, deflects it. Stake? Just bounces right off. Done. Back to doing hot girl shit. Cloud: Then I just use a spear instead. Barret: You are trying so hard to kill a vampire with big bazongas, and for what? Why would you do that to the ecosystem?

Zack, throwing a pokeball at Sephiroth: Sephiroth, I choose you! Sephiroth, not looking up from his book and catching it: You need an Ultra ball to catch this Legendary Pokémon.

Rude: Last week, Reno tried to flush a live lobster down the toilet "because it worked for Nemo".

Rufus: I taught the dog a new trick. throws ball Fetch! Dog: just stands there Tseng: He didn’t do it. Rufus: I taught him to ignore social conventions and think for himself.

Rude : Is… Is that meant to be on fire? Reno : No… not really. Rude : Are you going to do something about it? Reno : Hm… nah.

Cloud: Hey, Vincent, do you have any hobbies? Vincent: Swimming.. Cloud: Really? That’s cool. I never expected you to- Vincent: In a pool of self hatred and regret.

Genesis: Do you ever feel like exploding? Have you experienced the urge to enter the process of combustion? Has your mind created a logical idea, known as thought, to disperse your body into thousands of particles suddenly? Angeal: It’s 3 am, please go back to sleep.

Cloud: …I'm pretty sure that place is fire-proof, or something. Sephiroth, grenade in hand: Alright, but is it explosion-proof?

[rottenpumpkin13]

Cloud starts speaking Norse when he's angry, what to the others do?

*Furious Cloud starts swearing obscenities in old Norse*

*Annoyed Genesis screams at him in the Mideelese dialect*

*Confused Sephiroth tries to calm them down in Wutaian*

*Excited Zack starts spewing the old Gongagan that he knows*

Angeal: I have food.

*Everyone shuts up and looks at him*

Angeal: Interesting. A language you all speak.

[consumedshadow-mysticmc]