#source: big bang theory

[waterfire1848]

Husk: I shouldn’t be telling you this but…here.

Charlie: What is this?

Husk: Alastor’s one weakness.

Vaggie: Oh my God.

Husk: He can never know I gave that to you.

Charlie: I know I said I wanted to hurt him but this?

Husk: It’ll shorten the war by 10 years and save billions of lives.

[ Later. ]

Niffty: Alastor, you got a call from Heaven.

Alastor: Who is it?

Niffty: Your mom.

Alastor: Hey, mom. But mom-!

[incorrectquotesfromthelighthouse]

Davrin: I've got a new game. It's called "Coffee or Rook". I give you real things I've heard Lucanis say, and you all have to tell me if he was talking about a cup of coffee or his partner. Rook: Lucanis: I don't think I like this game.

[daddiesdrarryy]

James: Hey guys, Reg and I were thinking of having a big paintball game together

Peter: Prongs, why does Reggie want to shoot you?

James: He doesn’t want to shoot me

Sirius: Who doesn’t want to shoot you?

James: Reggie!

Sirius: No, that doesn’t sound right

James: He just wants to play Muggle paintball! It combines my love of whimsy with his love of making other grown men cry

Sirius: Sounds fun. Moony and I are in

Peter: You don’t need to ask him?

Sirius: No, I’ve been pretty annoying lately. He’s gonna want to shoot me

[fabuloustrash05]

Tom: Who’s Rouge?

Sonic: Knuckles’ girlfriend.

Maddie: Knuckles has a girlfriend?!

Knuckles: She’s not my girlfriend.

Tom: How long has this been going on?!

Tails: Four months.

Knuckles: She’s NOT my girlfriend.

Maddie: So let me get this straight, for the last four months Tom and I have been asking you three “what’s new” and none of you thought to tell us that Knuckles has a girlfriend?!

Knuckles: SHE’S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Wanda: Is there anything about me you don’t like?

Y/N: I’m not answering that. It’s a trap.

Wanda: So there are things you don’t like.

Y/N: And here I am in the trap.

[incorrectquoteshungergames]

Peeta, about Katniss: Our babies will be smart AND beautiful!

Haymitch: Not to mention imaginary.

[7ndipity]

(Y/n hugging Taehyung bc he was sad)

Namjoon, jealous: hey, I'm upset too, what about a hug for Joonie?

Y/n: aw sure! Tae, hug Namjoon

Namjoon:

Taehyung:

Taehyung: *tries to hug him*

Namjoon: dont-

[emmikay]

Odysseus: I invented a game. You want to play?

Diomedes: Sure.

Ajax the Greater: Yeah.

Odysseus: It’s called ‘Achilles or the Dogs’. I give you actual quotes I’ve heard Patroclus say, and you guess if he was talking to his boyfriend, or his dogs.

Diomedes and Ajax the Greater: (grin)

Patroclus: Go ahead, make fun. You can’t embarrass me.

Odysseus: Okay! Who was he talking to, Achilles or the Dogs? “I want you to know, the bed feels so lonely when you’re not in it.”

Ajax the Greater: (laughs)

Patroclus: Yeah, I may not be liking this game so much.

Diomedes: The dogs, give us another one.

Patroclus: You know, a man can care deeply about a lover, and his pets! It’s not strange.

Ajax the Greater: Oh, Achilles! I heard him say that to Achilles.

[filmyocean]

Maddie (about Eddie): It’s sweet that you care so much about him

Buck: I do. And I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if something happened to him, and I wasn't at his bedside to say "I told you so"

[harringroveera]

AU where Steve is totally jealous of Heather when she works with Billy at the pool

[waterfire1848]

Angel: I’ve got a new game. It’s called Spear or Charlie. I give you real things I’ve heard Vaggie say and you have to tell me if she was talking to her spear or her girlfriend.

Charlie:

Vaggie: I don’t think I like this game.

[incorrectquotesfromthelighthouse]

Teia: [about Crow!Rook] It's sweet that you care about them so much. Viago: I do. And I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if something happened to them, and I wasn't at their bedside to say "I told you so".

[daddiesdrarryy]

Remus: Prongs, are you coming with us?

James: Oh, geez, I don’t know if I can ditch Reggie two nights in a row. I don’t want to upset him

Sirius: Oh come on, man! Bros before…my brother

[incorrect-tmnt2012-quotes]

April: Your boyfriend is kinda… Raph.

Mona Lisa: And your boyfriend is extremely Donatello. What’s your point?

[incorrectquotesmcu]

[Natasha and you are getting married]

The Priest: Do you have any vows?

Natasha: Yes, I do. Y/N, not only are you the love of my life but you’re also my best friend and you got a friend in me. You’ve got troubles, I got them too. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for you. We’ll stick together and we’ll see it through cause you got a friend in me.

The Priest: Isn’t that the song from Toy Story?

Natasha: They love that movie.

Y/N, crying: I do!

[stardust948]

Sokka: Close your eyes.

Zuko: Ok. But don't punch me.

Sokka: What?

Zuko: When I was little, my sister would say "Close your eyes. I have a surprise for you." Then she punched me.

Sokka: I'm not going to punch you.

Zuko: That's exactly what she would say!