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Top Ways to Make Money in 2025 Make $500 or More This Week
Does the title look somewhat familiar? I’m sure you’ve come across ads or websites with this topic and it’s a LIE. Maybe you’ve noticed they haven’t actually utilized the suggestions they are promoting and earning $500 from their suggestions is often a lie. Once I see the bingo or casino style game apps it’s pretty clear. I read the reviews in the app store where there’s hidden costs or worse they are an outright scam! Avoiding scams, knowing if you have to shell out money, or when and how you can get the returns promised are crucial considerations. Which are important when struggling and in dire need, yet this is something that tends to be entirely overlooked by the typical “Need Money Fast?” style posts. Lets change that! Not only have I used and tested these apps, I will give you the details on what to expect and strategies to leverage multiple apps together to gain the best earnings!
WHAT TO EXPECT:
Realistically you could to earn between $100 to $300 within your first week. The catch: you need to use the links I provide and get the bonuses! Yes they are affiliate links where we both benefit!
This article is in 5 parts:
Shopping Apps Make or get money back on your purchases! Survey Apps Earn money for your opinions, insights, and more. Investment Apps Earn while you learn about investing! Other Options Here’s some other ways to generate income. Strategies Some ways to get the best gains and earn more!
Shopping Apps
Social Nature
Social Nature lets you try natural, eco-friendly products for free in exchange for reviews. From organic snacks to eco-friendly cleaning supplies or makeup, you can explore healthier alternatives by signing up, receiving free or rebates products, and sharing your feedback.
How it works:
There isn't a smartphone app for this yet; you access the webpage through your browser and receive updates through text message and email. There are a few ways this works:
You receive a voucher coupon for the product.
You purchase the product and upload a receipt for a full or partial refund.
How does it payout?
If you are getting a voucher, it can take about a week or sometimes longer to receive it in the mail.
For the cash-back option, after uploading the receipt, you will usually receive an email from [email protected] within 72 hours. Follow the prompts for the payout.
Social Nature Common Complaints & Fixes
Long Wait for Approval
Fix: Complete your profile and apply for various products to increase your chances. Being consistent with reviews will improve product selection. Not Receiving Product or vouchers
Fix: Double-check your shipping info and contact support if needed.
Receipt Issues
Fix: If the WiFi or data connection is slow there will be errors or issues with uploading. Connect to a working WiFi or move to an area with better signal. Refresh the website and upload again.
Fix: If the receipt is not clear, get another one from the store. If the receipt is clear but not processing, reach out to support. Didn't receive the cash-back email from Tremendous? Go to My Products from the Menu, Click on the product and contact support.
No Products To Try
Fix: Sometimes there are not products available to try, come back in a week or two for updates.
Currently the affiliate link doesn’t provide a bonus at this time when you sign up and share you link you are entered into a raffle. Join Social Nature Here: https://www.socialnature.com/friend-referral/?referrer=friend-146442-74ea825c-link
Fetch Rewards
Fetch Rewards lets users earn points by scanning receipts from everyday purchases at grocery stores, restaurants, and more. You can redeem these points for things such as gift cards to popular retailers like Apple, Barnes & Noble, Lowes, Sephora, Ulta, The Vitamin Shop and many more!
How it works:
With Fetch, you can:
Photograph and upload physical receipts
Scan your email for applicable e-receipts from select retailers
Use the app to purchase from online retailers and earn points
Play games/try out other apps to earn points
Points can be redeemed as gift cards, join a raffles to win prizes, or donate to a cause of your choice within the Fetch app
How does it payout?
Starting around 100 points you can join the raffles.
With 3,000 points, you can donate.
At 5,000 points, you can redeem gift cards.
To redeem points click on your point balance in the upper right corner of the screen, then click on the amount of points you have or want to redeem, and follow the prompts.
Fetch Common Complaints & Fixes
Not Receiving The Right Amount of Points for Receipts *This can be prevented by taking multiple pics of your receipt before swiping up to submit it.
Fix: Check the details of the offer to see if the store you got the product from and/or the product qualifies. If it does, there are two ways to fix this Go to your profile, click on points activity, select the receipt, in the upper right corner there is the pencil edit icon, you can add the item manually.
Fix: Go to your profile, click on points activity, select the receipt, in the upper right corner there is the pencil edit icon, you can add an item if the initial scan didn't pick it up, or you can click on the mislabeled item and scan the barcode or select find product. Then submit it for review.
Fix: Go to the home page and look for the item offer. Select the item then scroll down to where it says "Missing points from this offer?" And click on "Correct receipt." Select the receipt with the item and click correct receipt or contact support. Then follow the prompts.
Play Points for playing games through Fetch are Missing or Incorrect
Fix: Refresh the app, contact support. The catch...you can be rewarded the missing points, but...read the email support message and note this is a problem and using the play aspect can be risky.
App Freezing or Crashing
Fix: Close and reopen the app, update it, or clear the cache. If needed, reinstall the app.
Slow Point Redemption
Fix: Ensure your email is verified and check your spam folder for gift cards.
It takes a long time (1 month+) to build up points to redeem a decent amount!
Fix: Keep up on the higher point incentives and featured incentives as they change frequently! Games will net you better points too but you do need to enable app tracking. Invite friends to the app especially when the bonus is high.
Despite some hiccups, Fetch offers an easy way to earn rewards from everyday purchases, and most issues can be quickly resolved.
Using this link https://referral.fetch.com/vvv3/referraltext?code=7P2KJN or Code: 7P2KJN to get started with 2000 points!
Upside
Upside is a free app that gets you cash back on gas and other errands!
How it works:
Download the app and link your payment cards.
Browse for nearby offers on gas, restaurants, and more.
Select the business you will be making a purchase from and Claim the offer
Make a purchase at a participating location.
Complete the offer in the app by selecting the card used or uploading a receipt
Earn cash back that is typically credited to your account within 10 days.
How does it payout?
Payouts have minimum requirements, I have only utilized the Paypal payout option, it can take up to 24 hours to receive the payout and you can add multiple Paypal Accounts to payout to!
Gift card withdrawals: $10 minimum
PayPal: $1.01 minimum but they take a percentage if you don’t have a withdraw amount of $15 or more
Upside Common Complaints & Fixes
Offers Not Always Available or Change Frequently
Fix: Check the app frequently for updated offers, especially during promotions.
Slow Cashback Processing
Fix: Ensure your payment card is linked correctly and that the purchase was processed successfully.
Fix: Wait 10 days as they confirm with the payment processor of the business that the transaction went through.
Didn’t get cash back
Fix: Read the fine print on the offer as some gas stations may have a limit to redemptions. Example one gas station in my area limited the offer to cash back on 50 gallons of gas.
Fix: Contact Support, click the 3 lines i the upper right corner you will see your profile, other options, and “help.” Click on help and then click in the upper right corner to use the chat and submit a request. Check your email for a response if no one is immediatly available.
Limited Availability in Some Areas
Fix: Check if there is availability in your area go to the menu and select Help to put in a request or see how you can improve availability in your area.
Join using this link: https://upside.app.link/BRETTNEY2562 or use promo code: BRETTNEY2562 to get an extra 15¢/gal bonus on your first purchase!
SURVEY Apps
AttaPoll
AttaPoll is an easy-to-navigate app that pays users to complete short surveys. It’s simple straightforward and user-friendly.
How it works:
Take and complete surveys, or “AttaPoll Tasks” to earn a bit of cash. AttaPoll Tasks are typically downloading and trying out apps. Most are games, but sometimes to complete the task it requires a purchase.
How does it payout?
Once you earn $2.50, you can withdraw, with the exception of PayPal, you will need a balance of $3. I've only utilized PayPal to do withdraws with no issue. You can earn $5 within a few hours. Withdraws are limited to 1 every 24 hours.
AttaPoll Common Complaints & Fixes
Low Survey Availability
Fix: Complete your profile, enable notifications, and check the app at different times of the day.
Frequent Disqualifications
Fix: Answer screening questions honestly and ensure your profile is up to date. Pay attention to questions as they screen for bots, give thoughtful and detailed responses in text boxes. Regardless disqualifications do happen a lot, simply move on to the next survey.
Not Receiving A Payout Or Disqualified On Completing A Quiz
Fix: Contact Support by clicking on your profile select “Help” then select “Surveys” or “Other” and follow the prompts.
Payment Delays
Fix: Give it 30 minutes for the payout to complete. Make sure you have WiFi or a good data signal to complete your payout. Check that your account is linked correctly, and that it meets the payout threshold ($3 for PayPal). If all else fails, contact support.
AttaPoll can be a convenient way to earn a little extra, especially with the know how to navigate common issues. The advantage with AttaPoll is that surveys are plentiful. Get a $0.50 boost to start https://attapoll.app/join/rqfvc or Use Code: rqfvc
Eureka
Eureka is one of the best survey apps! It has a great design, easy to navigate layout and most of all if you start a survey and get disqualified they still give you $.02 for your time.
How it works:
Eureka Survey offers users the chance to earn cash by completing surveys or by downloading and trying out apps. Sometimes to complete the app trial it requires a deposit or purchase. With a fun easy-to-use interface and frequent surveys, it's a popular app for making extra money. However, like any rewards app, there are common complaints. Here's a breakdown and how to fix them.
How does it payout?
Earn $5 to be eligible for the payout, and you are limited to one payout every 24 hours!
Once your payment is processed, take the feedback survey to immediately earn $1.25
Eureka Common Complaints & Fixes
Closed Surveys
Fix: This happens a bit and you dont get the $.02 reward! The way to navigate this is to do surveys Monday to Friday!
Survey Disqualifications
Fix: This happens quite a bit, lessen the chances of this happening when you fully complete your profile, answer screening questions honestly, and frequent the app to have more recent surveys show up.
Low Survey Availability
Fix: Ensure your profile is detailed, turn on notifications, and check the app at different times. Close or refresh the app frequently. Eureka will only show a limited amount of surveys as you complete surveys, more will appear. However, during the weekdays is the best time to have ample survey availability.
Payouts Problems
Fix: Ensure your app is up to date, check that PayPal is verified, make sure your internet connection is working well as low or no signal areas will cause problems. Contact support if delays persist longer than 30 minutes!
Survey Issues
Fix: Restart the app, check for updates, and clear the app's cache.
Eureka can be a simple and fun way to earn cash Use my code UPT7QB or the link below for Eureka Surveys and unlock an entry $1 survey just for signing up! https://eurekasurveys.page.link/Z9g6ahbWsd2nXcn27
INVESTMENT APPS
Coinbase
Coinbase is a leading platform for buying, selling, investing and earning cryptocurrency.
How it works:
For this, you will be using Coinbase's learn-to-earn based Rewards program, where you can earn free crypto simply by completing educational quizzes or tasks. Cryptocurrency can be a profitable investment! By earning while you learn the basics, you can gain valuable insights into the realm of investments in digital finance. Coinbase has some international limitations see those here I'm going to be honest, Coinbase can be very complicated, especially if you are brand new to cryptocurrencies! Take your time and have patience as you go through some of the tasks! Also several of the tasks may require money to complete! Also do not withdraw the currency earned until all steps of the task are complete, as that may go towards completing the task! For example, with a task you may be rewarded learning about a cryptocurrency, then rewarded for downloading and installing a wallet connected to that currency. Another reward for transfering the currency earned to the wallet and then earning more with using some to do an activity through the wallet to then complete the task. Feel free to reach out via the comments below this post or to me directly for support.
How does it payout?
Coinbase often gives you the option to receive your sale proceeds as USD (deposited to your cash balance) or as USDC (a stablecoin pegged to the US dollar). Here's the clarified "Payouts" section:
Payouts (Getting Cash from Selling Crypto):
When you sell your cryptocurrency on Coinbase, you'll want to get that money into your bank account. Here's how it works:
Sell your crypto: You tell Coinbase you want to sell your Bitcoin, Ethereum, or other crypto.
Choose USD: Coinbase might give you a choice between USD (US dollars) and USDC (a digital dollar). To get real money in your bank, you MUST choose USD. This puts the money into your Coinbase USD balance.
Withdraw to your bank: Once the sale is complete and the USD is in your Coinbase USD balance, you then tell Coinbase to send that money to your linked bank account. This is called a "withdrawal."
Wait for the money: It usually takes 1-3 business days for the money to show up in your bank account.
Important Note about USDC: USDC is a type of cryptocurrency that's designed to be worth the same as a US dollar. It's useful for trading and other things within the crypto world, but if your goal is to get cash in your bank account, you need to choose USD when selling your crypto, and then withdraw the USD to your bank.
Common Complaints & Fixes
Rewards Not Showing After Quizzes or tasks
Fix: Ensure you completed the quiz, log out and back in, or contact support if the issue persists. I have experienced delays between 5 to 10 minutes on rewards.
Account Restrictions on Rewards
Fix: Verify your identity, ensure your country is eligible, and reach out to support for further help.
Fix: Coinbase has some international limitations see those here
Fix: Sometimes your ability to earn rewards just disappears or they change the menu configurations frequently. Take a break from the app and usually the issue will be resolved later.
Sign up for Coinbase and make a deposit in your account using my link and we can each get $20 in BTC. https://coinbase.com/join/RH5F3K3 Use Code: RH5F3K3 *If you have a hard time navigating tech, this may not be for you.
Webull
Webull makes it easy for beginners to start investing, offering new users up to 12 free stocks for signing up and depositing. This gives you an instant portfolio with no risk.
How does it work?
Create a Webull account and make a deposit.
Claim your free stocks you need to claim them or you wont get them.
Start investing in stocks, ETFs, or options (with caution).
How does it payout?
You can sell your stocks through the Webull platform and withdraw the proceeds to your bank account.
Note: The offers change frequently, some require adding in one cent, others $100+ read the fine print. But this is still a great way to start getting into investing! You can withdraw what you deposit.
Common Complaints & Fixes
This can be a confusing interface
Fix: Be sure to start with options for being new to trading. When I joined it gave me the option o that. You can start with paper trading and use educational resources.
Slow Customer Support
Fix: Use the help center or detailed in-app messages for faster responses.
Tax Confusion
Fix: Learn about capital gains taxes and use Webull's tax tools to stay informed.
Webull's free stocks, educational resources, and easy-to-use tools make it a great platform for new investors to start growing their wealth. Happy investing! Use this link: https://a.webull.com/3Dba18HsZwZiNAQzF7 to get 3 or more stocks for signing up and depositing $100 or more when you create your account.
Other Options
Poshmark
Sell clothing, jewelry, and decor on Poshmark it works best using your smartphone! Poshmark is a user-friendly marketplace that allows you to sell clothing, shoes, accessories, and even home goods. Whether you're decluttering your wardrobe or flipping thrifted finds, Poshmark makes it easy to earn money from unwanted items.
How does it work?
Sign up and set up your profile it’s completely free.
List Your Items – Snap clear photos, write a detailed description, and set your price.
Ship with Ease – Once your item sells, Poshmark provides a prepaid shipping label. Simply package the item and drop it off at the post office *TIP - make sure you get a drop-off receipt from the post office!!
How does it payout?
Once your item has been received from the person that bought it, you will be able to access your funds. there can be a 3 day delay from when the buyer receives it and when funds are released. You can use it to buy items or withdraw.
Withdraw funds with Direct Deposit (ACH Transfer) Instant Transfer (there may be some limitations on this) Paypal, or Venmo. Fees may apply.
Mailed Check – If you prefer, Poshmark can mail you a check instead.
Common Complaints & How to Resolve Them:
Slow Sales:
Fix: Enhance your listings by using high-quality photos and detailed descriptions.
Fix: Share your listings frequenlty to your network on Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest and to friends on the Poshmark app to boost visibility
Fix: Engage with other users by following, sharing, and commenting to increase exposure.
Fix: Add items often.
Fix: Do live shows if this interests you it can be best to go all in on it! You do need to meet some criteria before going live.
Fix: Ship items within 3 days!
High Selling Fees:
Fix: Poshmark takes a 20% commission on sales over $15 (or a flat $2.95 on sales under $15). To maximize profits, factor in fees when pricing your items. Poshmark makes this easy and will display what you will receive when you post your listing.
Returns & Cancellations:
Fix: While Poshmark generally has a no returns policy, disputes may arise if an item is misrepresented. Be transparent in descriptions and disclose any flaws.
Fix: If a buyer requests a cancellation before shipment, respond quickly to avoid penalties.
I enjoy Poshmark and I use it as a passive income generator by reposting listings and adding more items as I can. The hassle-free shipping with prepaid labels where I just pack print the label and ship, keeps it easy. The ability to negotiate and accept offers to boost sales is great too.
Turn your unwanted or unused items into extra cash while building a sustainable side hustle follow me there and comment here so I can follow you back! https://poshmark.com/closet/yewenchie Click to checkout my shop on Poshmark and Use Code: YEWENCHIE to get $10 OFF *Code is only good for new users to Poshmark.
Wag
WAG is a great way to gain some income without having a car! It’s best in dense urban cities! Wag is the perfect app for pet lovers looking to earn extra income by walking dogs, pet sitting, or offering drop-in visits. If you enjoy spending time with animals and want a flexible side hustle, Wag provides an easy way to get paid while staying active.
How It Works:
Sign Up & Get Approved – Create an account, complete a background check, and get verified.
If I remember correctly you will need to pass a test as well as the background check.
There is a fee associated it may be $65 with signing up for the background check etc. You can make part of it back with using my link to get a sign up bonus of $25 https://wagwalking.com/dog-walker?code=BRETTNEY29322 then you will get the rest back with your first few walks/boardings.
Payments go through Stripe, so you must link a valid bank account or debit card.
Set Your Availability – Choose when and where you want to work.
Accept Walks & Pet Care Requests – Browse available dog-walking, sitting, or boarding jobs in your area. Take photos and videos, follow the owners directions
How does it payout?
Complete a Service – Finish a dog walk, pet sitting, or other service.
Receive Payment Held in Earnings Tab – Earnings are typically processed every Friday for completed services.
Choose Payout Option – Use Instant Pay for quick access or wait for the weekly direct deposit.
Instant Pay – You may need to meet criteria before you can use the Instant Payout option. Fees are applied to this with minimum pay fee of 1.99 below $60 or 3% fee above $60 per transaction (this is subject to change), the benefit is it allows to receive funds within minutes via debit card.
Standard Payout – Free, but funds may take 3-5 business days to be deposited into your bank account. For me the money that is attributed to the standard payout happens weekly with the money going out of Wag Earnings on Thursday.
Your Earnings will display what is available with the weekly payout and the instant payout. If you opt for the instant payout it will include the weekly payout and 0 out your earnings.
Common Complaints & How to Resolve Them:
Low Pay for New Walkers:
Fix: Increase your earnings by accepting repeat clients and focusing on doing 30 min and 1 hour walks.
Fix: Offer additional services like pet sitting or boarding to boost income.
Scheduling Challenges:
Fix: The competition for walks can be high in some areas. Stay active on the app and enable notifications to grab new opportunities quickly.
Fix: Expand you radius for walks
Fix: Head to an area with higher demand to do on demand walks.
App Glitches & GPS Issues:
Fix: If the app isn’t tracking your walk properly, ensure your location settings are turned on and update the app regularly to avoid bugs.
Fix: Low signal areas may be challenging, get to spots with signal, use WIFI when available, contact support after the gig is complete.
Lots of fees
Fix: Be aware and prepared for the fees use the bonus link Wag charges a one time fee could be $65 for the background check with joining. Joine using my link https://wagwalking.com/dog-walker?code=BRETTNEY29322 apply and earn $25!
Fix: Avoid using the Instant Pay feature
Fix: Avoid paying for boosting your account but I could work starting out to get more work or higher paying walks.
It’s a learning curve and the upfront fee may be a barrier to begin. Yet once you get established and set-up recurring walks it can be a decent side gig. Want to try this out? Apply and earn a $25 bonus when accepted! (Terms apply.) https://wagwalking.com/dog-walker?code=BRETTNEY29322 Use code: BRETTNEY29322
Strategy
HOW I MAXIMIZE MY EARNINGS
Start with Social Nature look for deals that can be used at grocery stores that offer cash back through Upside then upload the receipt to Fetch. You not only get reimbursed through Social Nature you actually make some money.
Fetch is useful as you will earn points on any and all receipts that you can combine with points offered through credit and debit cards. As a hack you can use friends receipts, found receipts and double receipts like when you go get an itemized receipt and a separate credit processing slip.
Upside can combine with cash back offers and Fetch high point offers at grocery stores, and cash back credit or debit card offers with specific restaurants.
Attapoll and Eureka can give you bonus offers for JOINING apps like Upside Webull and Coinbase You can try to maximize the offer by seeing if you can use my affiliate code on top of the offer through the poll apps! I found Upside through Attapoll.
Enjoy using and combining these suggestions and let me know how it goes or if you have questions in the comments below!
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Click the link above to Buy me a coffee OBSCURAM costs money to keep it running! Even $1 supports on the website expenses! Thank you - Brettney
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This post contains affiliate links that are intended to support you with things that can get you bonuses, that have been vetted, tested, and researched! By utilizing the links it also gives crucial support in keeping Obscuam going as it does cost me money for hosting ect.
#Brettney Perr#Obscuram#obscuram.com#brettney#self empowerment#personal development#personal empowerment#self improvement#Hidden Knowledge#introspection#MakeMoneyOnline#how to make money online#legit side hustle#best money apps#best apps to make money#extra income#get paid fast#get money quick#cash back rewards#is fetch a scam#fetch#is upside a scam#Upside app#is attapoll a scam#attapoll#sign up bonus#is Webull a scam#webull stocks#Is Coinbase a scam#is Eureka a scam
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This is the way it was supposed to be experienced
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Alternate timeline where Stanley doesn’t accidentally ruin Ford’s project but he still doesn’t get into Geek Life University bc some kid showed up with a baking soda volcano
#Happens every time I’m telling ya#gravity falls#stanford pines#stanley pines#a tale of two stans#Y’all I just thought of smth fucked up#Remember that baby pic where ford was reaching towards the yellow triangle?#What if bill’s always been there#Cuz perpetual motion machines aren’t scientifically possible (think it’s bc entropy or smth to do w/ thermodynamics)#Ford couldn’t have made one—no one can#Either he was scamming them or (if what I said abt bill above is correct) *he* fucked w/ Ford’s machine to make it weird#Bc ford getting into a top school means he has more opportunities which means a better chance of getting the portal built#And then when Ford starts being like “screw your cipher” bill’s like “oh you think you can just *leave* me; I *made* you sixer!”#“I’m the reason you got into that fancy pants college! You honestly think you could’ve built that machine#We may be a team but I’m the mvp—always have been”#Okay I know it’s far-fetched but what is the gf fandom if not full of far-fetched theories (ain’t even a theory really more like an excuse#for angst and also bc of the fact that Ford invented Physics Breaker 5000 was slwsys a sticking point for me FOR SOME REASON)#Like I truly don’t know why that of all things bothers me#I really did just devolve into fanfic in the tags of a shitpost—oh and ig ford got into west cost in that au/version of events#shitpost
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Give it up Sussex Sewer. Women are not attracted to feckless eunuchs.
MEgain! Stop trying to make 'lust for Harry' happen. It's not going to happen!








Fight White Power!!✊👍🏿

#spare us#megxit#traitor prince#fetch is not going to happen#viscount louis spencer#lies#lust for harry campaign#women don't like harry#Ahab 2.0#Queen Jezebel 2.0#worldwide privacy tour#brf#like a spare#waaagh#Emasculated Sparry#nigerian scam#sussex sewer#yuck!#she chose a dolt
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my dnd character as a tweet
#dnd#maybe i should make a tag for her because im mildly obsessed with her#maia valtter#<- that is her name#well one of her names#the other is diana frank and she has 6 others#her job is accidentally selling her soul to a necromancer and doing fetch quests for him. also scamming people
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He Chose You (Pt.1)
Lucifer/Reader
Hazbin Hotel AU where Lilith never existed, Lucifer has been lonely for over a millennia and Charlie will be born one way or another. Rated E for explicit sexual content of the raunchiest variety in later chapters and also weird old people.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 13.5 | Part 14 | End
There was a knock at your door. It sounded like someone rapping their knuckles against the wood whimsically, as if following the beat of a song you couldn’t hear.
The methodical folding of your clothes into garage sale-quality drawers came to a halt. You looked over your shoulder, shifting on your feet hesitantly.
It had been little over a week since you moved into the grand old Donner apartment. Apart from a quick tow-in of shoddy furniture from your hired movers, no one had come calling.
You definitely weren’t expecting anyone either, not in a brand new city you’d spontaneously decided to live in.
After another moment of uncertainty, you pivoted to the door and inched it open to a slit you could peek through. “Hello?”
Your brow furrowed as you stared at the empty space ahead of you. Pulling the door open fully, you peered down one end of the hallway to the other.
Nothing but cracked and crumbling crown moldings on wainscoting, a matted-looking saxony carpet, the same musty, stale air…
‘Quack’
You nearly jumped out of your skin, head snapping down to see a real, live duck standing just outside your doorframe.
“Oh!”
You immediately squatted down to marvel at the animal. It gazed back up at you with beady red eyes and a curious gait.
“Hey little guy,” You cooed, smiling despite the incongruous image of a waterfowl in your building.
You raised a hand and reached out slowly, instinctive desire to pet the cute little creature warring with a minuscule yet no less embarrassing fear.
Were ducks typically friendly? You knew so little, ornithology not being your thing.
“Will you let me pet you?” Your fingers hovered over the surprisingly patient animal before it decided to nudge itself under your palm.
The duck shivered with delight at your touch, all-white feathers ruffling excitedly and tail wagging, looking akin to a very happy dog.
“Oh my god.” You gasped, heart melting. “You’re so cute!”
Soft feathers brushed against your bent knees as the duck drew close enough to rub its body against you. It had gone from doggish to cat-like effortlessly, and you couldn’t help giggling over how silly it looked.
“Where did you come from?” You asked after a bit of cuddling, glancing from side to side once again. The hallway remained empty, no one running to fetch what you assumed was a beloved pet.
‘That’s… weird.’ You thought. ‘So, who knocked on my door?’
It was tempting to ask the bird that was currently bouncing on its webbed feet. You couldn’t help but snort with laughter before positioning yourself so that you were sitting. In an instant, the duck made to climb into your lap, allowing you to carefully lift it onto your legs when it couldn’t reach.
“You’re so silly!” Grinning, you continued to stroke its head. “Your owner is probably worried sick about their silly little guy.”
‘Quack’
The duck burrowed its head against your stomach as it settled on your lap, and you sighed. “I’d love to keep you, but I don’t know how to take care of you, sweetie.”
Little red eyes bore into you from below, seemingly wide and beseeching. It was too precious, and too perfect (to the point where you idly wondered if someone was somehow scouting a way to scam you via adorable duck shenanigans).
Aside from the guttural, sad ‘wek’ you got in reply, a slow creak of hinges drew your attention back up. The door across from you had visibly opened the barest amount. You squinted, just able to make out frizzy red hair and a red-rimmed, down-turned mouth in the dim lighting.
“Oh hey, hi!” You stopped yourself from standing, instead of bracing the bundle in your lap close. “Is this your duck?”
A tingle went up your spine as the door opened fully and an old woman appeared. She was dressed in green capri pants and a ruffled tan blouse, hair red as an open flame and barely kept in-check by a cheetah-print scarf. The makeup she wore was caked on, harsh red lipstick smeared around her thin lips and black kohl-rimmed eyes popping out of her wrinkled face.
The sour, almost suspicious look on her face softened but did not completely go away, even when she smiled.
“Oh Lou!” She cried, making you jump. “You didn’t get very far, did you? I almost didn’t notice you were gone, you little scoundrel!”
“Well, thank goodness for that I guess. He’s got those little legs, ya see,” She nodded down at your lap, “but he’s so darn fast anyway, might as well be a midget racehorse!”
You chuckled and smiled politely. That persistent tingling at your back had you holding back a shiver, and the skin on your arms prickled and rose.
“I didn’t know we could have pet ducks in this building.” Your words belied a confidence, as well as interest in having a conversation with this woman, that you didn’t truly have.
As a matter of fact, despite the inner scolding you gave yourself for being judgmental, you were quite off-put in the woman’s presence. The want to return to your apartment and shut the door in her overly-painted face was rising like a lump in your throat.
“He seems to really like you, that’s so sweet. He’s not usually this friendly with anyone but my hubby. That’s Mr. Farrow, honey, have you met him?” The woman - presumably Mrs, Farrow, leaned down just a few feet away.
She still looked to be examining you and your avian companion, the bland pleasantness oozing yet unable to suffocate the shrewd glint in her dark eyes.
“Oh, uh, no. I’m afraid I haven’t -” You started.
“Oh, that’s alright! That’s fine! Matter of fact, he’d get an earful from me if he was talkin’ to a pretty thing like you without me knowin’!” Mrs. Farrow laughed. “Just kiddin’, honey. You’re new to the building though, aren’t you? Well, welcome! It’s nice to see a new face here! ‘Specially a young one!”
“Thank —”
“Maybe that’s why Lou is so taken with you! Animals just thrive off energy and sunshine and all that. Not slow, almost dead things. I’m sure you’re birds of a feather that way.”
Again, your soft laughter is polite, teetering on nervousness.
You took a moment to rise, humming apologetically when Lou squawked as he was jostled. On your feet, you instinctively stepped back. One foot over the threshold and solid in your apartment.
“He is really sweet.” You said, holding the animal out as carefully as you could. “I’m glad he didn’t get lost.”
Mrs. Farrow stared, arms falling to her sides. She didn’t attempt to take the bird from you for a long, long moment.
Confusion and disbelief clouded your mind as you stood, waiting, watching as Mrs. Farrow’s throat bobbed when she swallowed forcefully.
What? Was she afraid of the duck?
In a split-second, she returned to smiling animatedly and waved a geriatric hand in the air so flippantly that the uncomfortable moment ceased to exist.
“Oh honey, you can put him down if you want. He’ll come back over now that our door’s open.” Mrs. Farrow laughed. “Lou’s not my biggest fan. He’s such a prideful thing, you know. Just like Mr. Farrow - it’s probably why they get along so well!”
You blinked, then slowly bent at the waist to let Lou down. The duck made another disdainful quack, red eyes looking at you morosely.
It’s little legs eventually rowed through the air in an effort to gain footing. You lightly placed him over the carpet and let go, allowing Lou to jump down.
The duck began waddling away, though it appeared to hang its head as it did so. Occasionally, he turned to look at you, somber and sullen as if bidding farewell before walking on death row.
“Aww, poor little thing.” Mrs. Farrow drawled. At your side. “Looks like my Lou is sweet on you! Poor guy, I can see why! Again, a lovely young thing like you is probably a gift from above in this stuffy old place.”
“Say, how long have you been here?”
You turned to the old woman. “About a week, I’m still getting settled.”
Mrs. Farrow nodded vigorously, eyes bright but mouth pursed. “A week, a week?! A week and no one’s introduced themselves to you?”
“Holy Toledo, you must think we’re all a bunch a’ snobs in here! That’s no good. Oh! Why don’t you come over for dinner sometime and me and my mister can show you some proper hospitality?”
“Oh, that's really nice of you —”
“Sure! Sure! It’ll be great, how ‘bout tomorrow night? It’d give us some time to get prepared, have things cleaned and settled. Do you like steak? That’d be perfect, actually. I’ve got some in the freezer just waitin’ to be defrosted.”
“Um, well — That’s a little short notice…”
“I’m sure Mr. Farrow won’t mind. He’ll be glad for the company, and if he isn’t, well he will be when I’m done with him.” She chortled. “Just another joke, honey. He’s always dyin’ to talk to someone that isn’t me. It’d be a real treat to him. Treat ta me too! What do you say?”
Your mouth opened and closed as a light sheen of sweat broke over the nape of your neck. Mrs. Farrow’s sharp eyes were wider, attempting to beguile you while your head was still spinning.
“I-I guess, maybe —” You stammered.
“Wonderful!” The eccentric woman’s eyes lit up like fireworks, cigarette-smoker’s voice becoming truly raucous in her delight. “I’ll go ahead and get started. You go get back to what it was you were doing before Lou and I interrupted you! And don’t worry about a thing! We might be old timers, but a good meal and good cheer never go out of style.”
Mrs. Farrow laughed, pretending to shoo you away until you were back inside your apartment and she was pulling your door to a close for you.
“Have a good night, honey! We’ll see you tomorrow! 6 o’clock, don’t be late!”
Before you knew it, you were staring at the back of your own door again.
‘What the fuck just happened?’
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Gather 'round, all ye fuckers. It's time for another AU, let's go.
Time-travel. Obi-Wan from post-RotS (could be early in the Empire, could be as late as ESB, doesn't quite matter) wakes up in the past, as a 12yo, on that fateful trip to join the Agricorp.
He has a few short minutes to think it over, and then scams his way out and towards nearby Mandalore to find Satine.
(Her ghost was hanging out with Qui-Gon's when he was sent back in time, tethered by the Darksaber, and so Obi-Wan is pretty sure she's also somehow in the past?)
(If Qui-Gon's interested in helping, he can track Obi-Wan down. No need to make things easy for him.)
tbf even if he goes back to the Jedi when Qui-Gon comes to fetch him, he needs to plot and scheme with Satine first. Because reasons.
@threebea: Qui-Gon: we were literally five minutes from meeting Obi-Wan: sounds like a you problem Qui-Gon is not having a good mental health day. Like yes he's older and wiser but still.
Satine and Obi-Wan have been busy getting in the way of the Galidraan situation (the Duke is out of his mind with worry because his daughter and heir randomly disappeared in the night.) Obi-Wan figured Qui-Gon could handle Xanatos on his own for a bit
Qui-Gon, suspicious: Have you been kissing? You're twelve. Obi-Wan: On the cheek, sure. Satine: He looks a third of my actual age at death. I look a fifth of his. We are neither of us comfortable with more. Obi-Wan: Also I've been told I need to worry about cooties.
The three of them speed run Jedi apprentice problems since they can't just leave the problems they need to fix unsolved, but way easier when you know who and what the solution is. Like yes they could get someone at the temple to catch Xanatos, but a twelve year old smacking him in the face and getting him in a headlock, and then later saying Xanatos tripped on his cape and knocked himself out oh dear. Also Bruck lives and is weirded out with how Obi-Wan gives him old man advice later.
They're also eager to get to the Real Problems Of Deadly Sith. They can't just SKIP the problems, but man. They sure are hitting fast forward.
Bruck definitely tries to goad Obi-Wan about his "secret girlfriend" that is in no way a secret.
Everyone knows about Obi-Wan having a "pen pal" that he has stated on more than one occasion that he'd have gladly married if not for the tragedy of their stations.
"Padawan Kenobi, you are twelve." "And yet, I shall live my life yearning for the lady who owns my heart, star-crossed as we are."
There's at least one meeting in those early years where Jango is present at an interaction and is abruptly concerned that he's going to have to figure out how to prevent a teen pregnancy without making everything weird. Does he just throw condoms at them? He doesn't know what size they need. Maybe tell their parents? He should tell the parents. He is not qualified to cockblock the 14yos.
#star wars#obitine#obi wan kenobi#satine kryze#qui gon jinn#time travel#duke kryze#bruck chun#jango fett#sw legends#phoenix talks
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Santae banned me without telling me why and won't unban me unless I send them my photo ID
Hey guys sorry for not posting in… forever? I just suck at social media lol. But you may have seen that I've reblogged some posts that advertise Santae in the past, but please disregard all that. I've since deleted those posts after learning how the site is managed and, after what happened to me a few days ago, I feel as though I should go public about this. Because boy did I just get fucked over.
Anyway, yeah, what it says in the title. On October 24th, around 10am EST, I was restocking my user shop when the entire webpage went white. I couldn't access the site at all and, when I tried to look for the Discord on my server list, it wasn't there. I knew what this had meant. I got banned from both the game, and the Discord - this is important to keep in mind for later.
I didn't receive any Discord DM or email notification about my ban, so after asking a mod what their support email was (and yes, I later verified that this is indeed their legitimate support email), I sent them this:
After a few hours, I get this back in response:
There's so much I'm confused about here. I think the one that screams out the most is that they're asking me to show them my photo ID so I can get unbanned. Absolutely not. I refuse to do this. This poses a massive security and privacy risk. They straight up banned my account, gave this half-baked explanation, and told me I need to send my personal information or... I stay banned?
Let me make something clear: The only personal thing they have on file about this account is the email address that I created my account with, which I've also used to contact them. My real name, date of birth, anything of that nature would not be connected because this was not asked for during account creation, therefore this wouldn't actually prove I'm the account holder. Theoretically speaking, I could show them any ID in the world and for all they know, that's my real information, because they have nothing else to go off of. They even say as much in their privacy page.
Secondly, "account has been compromised"? What does that mean? I think anyone's interpretation of this would be that my account got hacked. But if my account got hacked, why wasn't I informed of this? I had to reach out to support, they did not reach out to me first. That means my password, which I may share across other sites, would have been known to someone else and thus I should've been warned of this immediately, not roughly 5 hours after the fact.
Thirdly, what, was my Discord "compromised" too? If an automated system had flagged my account, does that system somehow interact with a Discord bot so they ban a user on both at the same time? How does that work? That makes no sense as to why they'd ban me on both the game and the Discord for something like this, which is why I'm calling bullshit.
Let me tell you what I think happened.
Recently, Santae has been in some really hot water with connections revealing their relation to an older petsite, Lurapets, which has a history of scamming and artist mistreatment, as well as proof coming out of them using AI art for their NPC art. You can find these posts on the @santae-salt blog if you want to see for yourself, but I'm also linking them throughout this post.
Once the post about them being directly related to Lurapets was released, several users that the Santae staff thought might be involved in the creation of the post got banned. As it turns out, I was banned at the same time as these users.
After speaking with the @santae-salt admin, we are both of the belief that I, a regular user, got caught up in this mess because they're assuming I'm an alt account of someone else and staff demanded to see my ID because they didn't think I was a different person. It may turn out to be wrong, and yeah that sounds a bit far-fetched, sure, but really, what else can I go off of here?? Santae staff has given me a very questionable and refutable explanation as to why I've been banned, and their radio silence after I refused to send them my ID is just making me believe they don't think I'm real. They don't want my photo ID to verify I'm the account holder, they want my photo ID to verify I'm not someone else.
This is unprecedented. I've never seen any petsite ask for a photo ID in any situation, and after asking around, not even those banned from Santae were asked for this. It's just me! This is an incredible attempted breach of privacy, and, with Santae now under doxxing allegations, I really don't feel confident they'd keep my personal information… well, personal.
I messaged back almost immediately after they responded to me where I told them I would not send my ID and I had asked if there were any other way I could verify myself to get my account unbanned. I've received no response so far, and after what I've learned, I feel like I'm not going to get one at all.
So, let this be a lesson to you: don't waste your time on Santae. You can be the most obedient player out there. You can abide by all their rules, be a nice and generous player, or just be minding your own business, but if they so much as think you're associated with someone who they think has wronged them, you'll be banned.
And they can't even be bothered to properly tell you why.
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Ooh hearing about the events in your Yandere au, I can only imagine how fed up MC is by the time of Playful Land that, when they’re all locked in, I can just imagine her immediately joining Jade and Lilia in trying to destroy the locks. If only to have something to vent all her anger and frustrations on which promptly bites her in the butt via puppetification.
Especially after a day of running from one group to another and having forced, sort of date moments with the various boys. Vil and Floyd instantly locking in on the “order the losers around” during the pool game that MC’s like “I’m in danger we HAVE to win”. There will nearly be a brawl on who gets to sit next to MC and multiple folks glaring at Grim for smugly sitting in her lap. At least Rave Up is far less annoying song than Neige’s when she’s forced up on stage with the gang.
Wonder if Fellow would be more of a platonic yandere towards MC, and possibly one to Gidel too, taking extreme lengths to make sure Gidel’s cared for and protected.
I imagine she saw straight through Fellow’s free ticket scam and didn’t want to go like the other rational people, but Grim wanted to and she got dragged into it.
And the ‘date’ moments. At this point the MC is fed up with all the drama and chaos of being the darling to so, SO many yanderes, so she’s just completely numb to their shenanigans.
So she goes on the ‘dates’ begrudgingly.
The rollercoaster, there’s fighting on who gets to sit next to her. She argues that if they don’t calm down and figure out where everyone sits like rational people, she won’t ride at all. So they play rock-paper-scissors for it. And yes, Grim sits on her lap. (She regrets that, because Grim had a bright idea to try and eat the tuna, but Grim is better than any of the others.)
The game area, she gets roped into that bet and while she’s terrified of losing, she can’t deny the wonderful possibility of ordering the losers to leave her the hell alone. So obviously she’s on Ortho’s team, after seeing him play so perfectly. Victory is sweet when it saves her mental health.
The most fun she’ll probably have is with the last group in the Seabed Stroll, mostly because it’s with two of the more chill yanderes (and Leona’s there too) and the attraction was cool. Also she’ll laugh her butt off watching Jack and Leona riding the merry-go-round.
While the MC avoids being on stage like the plague after the VDC, she does have a little fun with that, Maybe that’s what relaxes her fears about Playful Land.
(But first imagine if Playful Land had a Tunnel of Love, the fight that would have broken out definitely would have destroyed the park)
Only to be proved completely right after they get locked in. And then after they get locked in, she immediately tries to break the locks to escape, and only to realize she can’t move and becoming very, very panicked at the realization that she’s at the mercy of either the kidnappers or her very, very obsessed yanderes. (she picks the kidnappers BTW, it's the lesser of two evils).
Obviously, she gets her own cage as a puppet. After all, you’re the best out of all of them in the eyes of the Fellow and Gidel, and you would fetch a high price if the boss sold you.
But to amend the yandere types, I orginally wrote a romantic yandere for Fellow/Ernesto, (check the masterlist) but platonic also works too. Maybe he lets her out because ‘she’s not one of the other NRC students so his boss doesn’t want her’ but actually because he’s more interested with keeping her out of being a puppet slave for the rest of her life, and that the boys deserve it for what they put her through. But since she tried to run for it, she gets to be a puppet for now until the trade off is over with.
Think that’s all I’m gonna say for now till I get around to doing that event. Thanks for asking, anyways!
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The Con
A doll that has been scammed! Swindled! Smeckledorfed! The doll went to make its dinner for the night (dinosaur eggs oatmeal), only to find that the packet contained... *no* dinosaur eggs! With a sharp wail of despair, the doll cried out for its witch. With a crack of thunder, she appears on the scene. Face full of fear, and eyes full of fury at what could possibly have caused her most precious doll to cry out in such a manner. With wracking sobs the doll explains the situation, begging its witch to save suppertime.
"Fear not!" the witch cries. "As it knows, not only am I a witch... I am a TIME WITCH. I will save your dinner, little one. I will fetch you the finest dinosaur eggs!"
And so on that fateful day the doll got her dinosaur eggs... and the witch learned that the eggs in oatmeal aren't meant to be *real* dinosaur eggs.
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S/O asks skeleton to go on a grocery trip. Who's following the list? Who's terrible at it?
Undertale Sans - Well you better not have forgotten anything in the list because he is pretty much lost when he has to pick things by himself. Added to that, Sans can buy random things just because he thinks the name is funny and that he can make a pun out of this at some point during the week. He can't be trusted on his own.
Undertale Papyrus - Papyrus hates grocery trips. The mall is crowded, there are strong lights everywhere and it's too noisy. He usually gets overwhelmed pretty fast and despite doing his best, forgets a few things every time. Being autistic is hard sometimes.
Underswap Sans - He's the worst nightmare of any customer trying to do their groceries. Blue thinks grocery trips are boring so he made them a little more fun by running at full speed with the cart in the aisles, laughing maniacally. He wants to be done in less than five minutes. He's also banned from most shops in the city, how did that happen? But eh, if he's banned from all of them, it means he doesn't have to go again, right?
Underswap Papyrus - He's the one using the kitchen the most so he prefers to go fetch the groceries by himself anyway. Honey knows what he wants and he's pretty good at saving money added to that. He's the perfect man.
Underfell Sans - So, crazy story! Some maniac robbed him in the parking lot and stole all the vegetables, and he put all of these snacks in the back of his car instead! He knows, he knows, that's hard to believe but he swears it's the truth. He doesn't know what to tell you, but eh, at least you have 20 different flavors of chips now, isn't it cool? Somehow, you have a feeling he's not telling you the truth. For sure, it has nothing to do with how much he hates vegetables.
Underfell Papyrus - Edge is not a big fan of grocery trips, but he does the job and doesn't complain. He's great at finding good deals and he's scary good with negotiations when he's not agreeing on a price. He wins all the time, and sometimes, yes, he scams people by making them confused. He's just that good.
Horrortale Sans - You send Oak to the mall, and you go to fetch Oak in a random space museum 5 miles away from the mall two hours later. What did you even expect? If you want your groceries, go to fetch them yourself.
Horrortale Papyrus - He only goes for small grocery trips when you're missing something, as he can't stand up for too long and he gets quickly exhausted in malls with all the lights and the noise. Willow prefers to visit the local market when he can to avoid the crowd. He's very selective with his fruits and vegetables.
Swapfell Sans - He goes to pick up the groceries, except he takes only the most expensive brands, which means if you don't want to go bankrupt before the end of the month, you better do it yourself. Nox is also meticulous which can be a problem. If something is missing on the list and you needed it anyway, he's going to act defensive and scream that it's not his fault.
Swapfell Papyrus - Money? You gave him money? He doesn't remember :) Never give money to Rus, it always ends in fast food or dumb things you absolutely don't need. He regrets nothing.
Fellswap Gold Sans - Like hell he's going to go buy his groceries in a place crowded with disgusting little humans full of bacteria and viruses. Wine orders his groceries online and watches from the couch as a driver comes to put everything in his fridge. He has standards.
Fellswap Gold Papyrus - W-wait, you want him to go to the mall? Him? Coffee is having a panic attack, and he's already on the verge of crying. Please don't send him there all alone! He's going to get lost, or worse! Everything but not this, he's begging you.
#undertale#underswap#underfell#horrortale#swapfell#fellswap gold#sans#papyrus#undertale ask blog#undertale asks#undertale imagines#undertale headcanons
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Mushroom fact of the week!
Mushrooms scam trees!
Some fungi get their nutrients by exchanging nutrients with plants. The fungi provides phosphorous and the plant gives carbon in return.
The less phosphorous available, higher price the plant will pay for the phosphorous, giving more carbon for each unit received. However, when there is more available the fungi will receive less carbon for its troubles.
So what these fungi do, being the scammers they are, is transport phosphorous through the mycelium from areas of high abundance to areas of low abundance where it is more scarce and fetches a higher price. This way, the fungi is able to get much more carbon out of the plant.

#fungi#mycology#mushrooms#mushroom posting#fungi are scammers#the mycelium#mushroom fact of the week
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In 1968 Ken Russell made a film about an AI built by a right wing billionaire maniac that was used by the CIA to run a scam. It flopped, the public thought it far fetched.

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WhatEVER MeGain! Fetch is NOT Going to Happen, EVER
Refresher: As IF Meghan Markle will EVER be Luxury: Meg's Floptastic Flaws Part 4 "She Will NEVER Be Luxury"
youtube

As Ever:

#Ibbile Dibble#Fetch#meghan markle is a fraud#rebrand#netflix rebrand#ARO#as ever#megs floptastic flaws#she will never be luxury#jam scam#Youtube#netflix#megflop
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A word on Benedetto’s father figures
Because I’ve been thinking about it all week. Have some parallels and contrasts, my friends:
Villefort:
Starts off Benedetto’s story extremely strongly by literally burying him alive within minutes of his birth. No one has ever failed their son harder.
Might have been onto something when he said crime spread around him and from him like a disease. Seriously, look at this family! It’s so dysfunctional in so many ways!!! If you’re a nature-over-nurture person, it’s not that far-fetched to suppose Benedetto got the Criminal Gene™ from him.
Literally changed his name to hide his compromising origins (as much as humanly possible in the spheres he frequents).
Burnt Edmond’s denunciation letter. Guess who else likes to burn things?
Is brought down by the literal unearthing of his biggest secret, which in turn concludes Benedetto’s arc.
Bertuccio:
Is, literally, the one who gave Benedetto life, and the emissary of Providence™ who shows up to bestow blessings upon him at semi-regular intervals.
Unfortunately, those gifts are always cursed. Surprise salvation from the grave in the garden? Only happens because Bertuccio tried to murder the kid’s father first, and results in what is functionally a kidnapping. Surprise adoption? Results in Benedetto being raised by a literal criminal, who is #shocked when his protege starts hanging out with ill-intentioned older boys and disciplines him with what we can reasonably assume from the unreliable narration is the good old belt. Surprise life-changing information about his origins that Bertuccio held onto all these years? Only revealed to cement Benedetto’s status as Monte-Cristo’s puppet.
Crumbled the second Benedetto questioned his ascendance, therefore drawing a clear link between authority and paternity and reinforcing the kid’s desire to defy both.
“Major Cavalcanti”:
Is just Some Guy™.
And yet, they have so much in common: both are impostors trapped in Monte-Cristo’s web, both are passionate about scamming rich people. There’s a quasi-instantaneous recognition between the two and, because they share the same goal, they develop a strangely wholesome understanding…? It’s forced coexistence as much as it is respect, but it’s not deprived of a weird sort of warmth, and Monte-Cristo himself comments on how much it looks like actual familial love. The contrast with Caderousse could not be harsher.
In virtue of his fake wealth and fake fatherhood, the Major becomes the Ultimate Authority™ ‘Andrea’ name-drops every time he wants to advance in society.
Caderousse:
Outwardly, he adopts all the attributes of a good father. He taught Benedetto most of his tricks! He feeds him! He talks of all the hardships they’ve been through together, like a family would!
But, of course, what he’s really doing is blackmailing Benedetto. Caderousse wants money, and it’s taken him a while to actually get his hands dirty, but he’s finally graduating to murder! And his silly young friend should help him if he doesn’t want his blood spilled on Place de Grève.
Anyway Benedetto stabs that guy real bad. I thought it was hilarious of him.
Danglars:
As Andrea’s future father-in-law, Danglars is his ticket towards the life of luxury without effort he has always wanted.
Of course, Danglars is using Andrea for the same reason Caderousse uses Benedetto: for money. Both of them lie about what they own, ergo about who they are, to get their hands on what they think the other has. This is especially interesting when put in perspective with the brutal honesty Danglars employs when talking to Eugénie, who he treats like a son and almost business partner rather than like a daughter (Transmasc Eugénie Truthers, rise up!).
… But of course, he still wants people to think of he and Andrea as family to strengthen his own nobility: if his son (in-law) is a prince, a title Danglars repeats ad nauseam, doesn’t that make him a king?
All things considered, despite losing their freedom (temporarily in Danglars’ case), money and status, both of them get a relatively happy ending compared to most of the cast.
Monte-Cristo:
BUCKLE UP THIS IS THE MOST INTERESTING.
Twice Benedetto raises the possibility of Monte-Cristo being his biological father, a perfectly logical conclusion in light of what he has done for him; in turn, Monte-Cristo recognises Benedetto as one of God’s punishers, a title he otherwise only attributes to himself.
Both of them went through a symbolic rebirth after being buried alive.
Both of them were wrongly accused of being evil incarnate, but eventually graduated to Full-On Criminals. Talk about self-fulfilling prophecies.
Escape Artists™
Both had to completely reinvent themselves, down to their names and origins, to achieve their ambitions.
Ruined engagement ceremony!!! This also draws parallels to Villefort and, interestingly, to Valentine and Franz.
THIS:
🇫🇷 « Ce calme, cette parfaite aisance firent comprendre à Andrea qu’il était pour le moment étreint par une main plus musculeuse que la sienne, et que l’étreinte n’en pouvait être facilement brisée. »
🇬🇧 « This calm, this perfect poise told Andrea that he was presently held by a hand far stronger than his, whose grip could not be escaped easily. »
Both Edmond and Benedetto know they are prisoners of people more powerful than they are, of the narrative, of a superior power that wields them like knives; both Monte-Cristo and Andrea accept their role as knives in the hope of eventually slicing through their ties. Whether or not they succeeded in the end is up to the reader’s interpretation.
#literature#french literature#alexandre dumas#le comte de monte cristo#benedetto#benedetto tcomc#andrea cavalcanti#gérard de villefort#bertuccio#major cavalcanti#gaspard caderousse#danglars#edmond dantès#random ramblings
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i have always loved how you write the price family with how realistic they are. the beauty and the ugly side of reality.
but i gotta say, the ‘love?’ was your 1st fic that got me disappointed. in fact, if you claim that someone else stole your account and wrote it, i would believe you. and not because it was written badly (it was written beautifully, as always) but because of how far fetched it was based on how you’ve written their personalities are.
evelyn got roped in an abusive relationship with a jock. like what?? evelyn, the tenacious, strong-willed, stubborn, sly, and cunning evelyn?? did all the father-daughter dates meant nothing? did not seeing his parents as an example not taught her anything? had this been lily (let’s say she likes men for the sake of this conversation), it would’ve been more plausible. but someone who has such a stable mental fortitude, solid foundation of love and strong support system falling for a jock who has rumors of women falling victims to him? it’s just not at par with how you’ve written her. like, indy was right that no one taught her, but evelyn? she was taught since she was a child how a lady should be treated. all those years of being such a confident person and surrounded by people who love her, she’s crumbling like a cliched love-starved person and got brainwashed that easily (and quickly)? gtfo.
jj had no idea about the relationship? when they go to the same school and evelyn is showing beauty like indy? any older brother who had a close relationship with their sister would know when their sister is being flocked by guys and yet he’s clueless? i can understand not being able to stop evelyn but there’s nothing written about jj warning her even? and he was being insulted while he was at his own house and yet he’s silent? huh???
and indy??? scarily smart, my foot. your child already asked how to practice safe sex and you already know she’s sexually active and you didn’t think that they won’t do any monkey business while behind closed doors? you who price can’t even trick and is deeply attuned to how your kids are suddenly forgot common sense? price is the only one who i can forgive on this one and only because he’s always away. but with how much he knew his children, he didn’t even even have a clue how evelyn was changing? but ok, fine, let’s say he was away for many months. truthfully, had you written nick as a guy pretending to be good and no rumors around him then he suddenly changed and the horror stories started coming out of the woodwork when it’s too late, it would’ve been more believable. that he’s such a good guy with clean record that all the girls want him. like someone you can really bring home to your parents type of guy. but in truth, he’s just really good with facades, and he’s nothing but an off the mill toxic guy who’s really good with gaslighting, and he knows how to manipulate people into thinking he’s a dream guy. which means that evelyn was duped and conned by a facade. that she thought seeing all the signs she was taught to look for and being treated like how he sees her dad treat her mom, she found the right guy. or maybe nick is already this guy. unfortunately, we didn’t know that since you didn’t write him this way. and that would be a great lesson for evelyn to learn. it would be more realistic that she was scammed by a guy pretending to be good but really just a trash since she’s surrounded by good men so she never knew what signs to look for, she never had an example to learn from. anyway, that’s my review. thank you for reading this.
Damn, tear me to shreds 😂
I’m just kidding! Thank you for the feedback!
The things you’re upset about in the fic and them not matching who you know these characters to be is the entire point. The underlying part that I didn’t specifically write out because I like the readers to infer and question is “how did no one notice?” And “Evelyn would never!” Indy didn’t see it and she’s crazy perceptive. Jj didn’t notice and they go to the same school. John’s too busy most of the time to notice and waits for Indy to fill him in. Without her he’s clueless half the time so when she’s clueless they’re both blind.
It’s the cursed middle child to be forgotten trope.
Evelyn’s strong, they don’t have to worry about her. Until she slips through the cracks and actually needs that kind of attention; but everyone’s too preoccupied to notice. The only person who noticed was Archie, her best friend who’s involved in her life daily. And it’s usually friends of teenagers who see what’s happening before parents do.
Indy even says ‘she tends to have good judgment’ clearly dismissing anything bad could happen because she trusts her daughter a little too much. It’s a damning moment that shows her flaws as a person and mother. That’s why John referencing how Indy’s father never paid attention to her is a crucial detail. Indy’s doing the same thing she experienced with her own father. The pattern repeats. Hence why Indy’s okay with the two studying in Evelyn’s room (With the door open. I realize I might not have added that detail.) While Jj is to roped up in his own life to be paying attention to Evelyn like he use to. He has a girlfriend, plays football, a social life; he’s not focused on her at all.
As for Nick I wanted him to come off arrogant from the rip. I wanted everyone to see he was toxic and trash. Because why the hell would our lovely tough as nails Evelyn look twice at him? Whats the draw for her? I wanted reader to be asking themselves that as they read and come to a conclusion on how and why they thought this happened.
The most strong willed girls/women fall for toxic guys even when they are presenting as toxic. Being 16 inexperienced and wanting love can make a young girl throw everything she’s been taught out the window when the need to be wanted arises. When someone feels forgotten like middle children can they’ll search for someone who will give them all that attention they’ve been craving even with all the red flags presenting. She was the perfect victim and fell into the trope of being love starved. Because in my opinion at that age sometimes feeling wanted is addictive.
“When you look at someone through rose colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags” -Bojack Horseman
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