#is stream of consciousness what it’s called

[reallychaoticwoo]

⛓️ Aahh, I really hope this lives up to your expectations! I really worked hard on it! Please keep in mind that im still working on my smut writing skills, but we will get there, lol. Also, im sorry this took so long. Life has been hectic. This is not proofread, so i apologize for that, but hopefully, you can enjoy it anyway (:⛓️

✨️Mistakes Were Made✨️

❤️Pairing: Changbin x f reader

⚠️Warnings: MDNI 18+ ONLY! Very little plot, smut, unintentionally rough Changbin, body injury during sex (hip gets dislocated), crying, screaming, hip relocation (not in major detail but still), please lmk if I missed anything

‼️This is purely for entertainment purposes and does not represent Changbin in any way‼️

🖤Little reminder that although requests are on pause im still accepting short drabbles, imagines, reactions, smau, and text requests🖤

It wasn't unlike the two of you to start getting hot and heavy when his dorm mates were home. There was rarely a time when all of them were out at once. So once again, you two were going at it in his room, trying to remain somewhat quiet. Although Changbin was generally a soft and doting boyfriend, he was an absolute beast in the bedroom. His strong arms manhandling you to his hearts content. He always knew it was a possibility that his friends could walk in on the two of you at any given time, but when he was in the moment, it never seemed to matter to him.

Your breasts against the bed, back arched to perfection and his hands on your hips, was the only thing on his mind right now. He was lost in the way your body reacted to him relentlessly pounding into your sopping cunt with sharp deep thrusts. You were a moaning, whining, grunting, feral mess that he could get enough of. Leaning forward to kiss in between your shoulder blades as a silent praise for how well you were taking him tonight. "F-fuck binnie - fuck harder please" your voice muffled into the sheets but he heard you loud an clear. His large hands gripping your hips tightly, pulling you back into him harshly with each one of his thrusts. You were screaming into the mattress at the feeling of his tip repeatedly hitting your cervix. Just as your high started to coil inside of you, your release becoming emanate, something popped. Your body collapsed into the sheets, tears streaming down your face in agony. Changbin who was still relentlessly thrusting into your almost paralyzed body, had no idea how hurt you really were in this moment. Turning your head to the side to try and catch your breathe you screamed for him to stop. He stopped immediately and without hesitation, pulling out of you with wide eyes and horror written all over his face.

"Baby.. what's wrong..? Oh my god, did i- did I hurt you??" He was on the verge of tears his heart collapsing inside of him.

"I.. fuck.. I cant..." You couldn't even finished your sentence. Your sobs too uncontrollable from the mortifying pain that had you on the brink of consciousness. "My.. m..my hip.."

That's when it registered. He'd felt a pop when you collapsed. He just assumed it was a normal pop. Your hips did that sometimes when the two of you were getting intimate. But now that he's thinking about it, it really only even happens if you're on top. Oh god.. Your hip. It looked as it it was pushed forward, no longer level with your spine like your other hip. Your back dimples weren't as prominent as they had been just a couple of minutes ago. What did he do??

"Shit, fuck, baby I'm so sorry!! What do I do?? How? fuck!" He was panicking, tears rolling down his face. How could he have hurt the love of his life, the very woman he'd been planning to propose to soon, the woman he was going to marry. How could he have hurt her like this? He did the only thing he could think of in that moment. He called for his Hyungs.

Running out of the room, pulling up his boxers as he ran into the living room, he scanned the room so glad to see both Chan and Lee Know home and sitting on the couch. They both turned to look at Changbin with puzzled faces that instantly turned to worry once they noticed his tears.

"Bin, what's wrong?? What happened are you okay?" Chan asked as he walked over to the man scanning his face for any type of clue as to what the hell happened.

"I hurt y/n..." Binnie replied with sorrow filled eyes and slack shoulders.

"What the fuck do you mean you hurt y/n Changbin?" Lee Know was walking to the younger man now. His face filled with disappointment and a tinge of anger.

"I- i... I didn't mean to just please help me!" He begged already turning to run back to you.

You were in the same position he left you in.

Unable to move your legs to lay flat, your backside still on full display, you sobbed and screamed into the bed praying for Changbin to hurry back so you could tell him how to fix this. Your prayers were answered as soon as he came back into the room. Although, you weren't praying for his two older members to follow him into the room and see your naked body fully presented to them.

"I'm sorry babygirl I didn't know what else to do.. can you.. can you please tell us what happened??" Changbin asked, tears still streaming down his flushed cheeks, his heart racing and his chest tightening.

"My hip.. you.. my hip is dislocated..I can't move.." Your voice was broken and raspy. Trying not to panic him worse, you tried to sound as normal as possible but the pain you were in was unbearable.

"Shit Bin, how the fuck did you manage that? Okay, y/n, I'm gonna have to pop it back into place.. I know this isn't ideal, and you are probably wishing we weren't in here right now, but I promise you I can have you mobile again soon if you can let me. Is that okay?" Chan was more than capable and you knew that. His reassuring tone helping ease your utter embarrassment at the situation.

Closing your eyes tightly, trying to hold back tears, you nodded. "O.. okay"

"Okay. Bin, I'm going to need you to keep her hips as still as possible okay? We don't want her worsening it or popping it out the other way when I go to push it into place. Think you can handle that?" Chan asked. His voice was stern and comforting all at once.

Lee Know who was still somewhat in the doorway was glaring daggers at Chabgbin. How could he be so careless as to dislocate your hip without noticing in the moment. Who even does that?

"Lee Know, you judging Bin isn't going to help anything. Go back out to the kitchen and get y/n some water and throw a blanket in the dryer so she can have something warm after this. Bin, go ahead and start holding her in place. " Chan was the leader for a reason. He knew exactly what he was doing. Leaning down to look at you in the eyes, he started, "I need you to control your breathing, okay? I'm not going to lie to you. This is going to hurt.. but I'm gonna fix it, okay? Just keep breathing." Moving back to your hip, he felt around the area to find where he needed to place his hands to relocate it correctly. With firm pressure on both the front and back of your hip, he counted to three and quickly popped it back into place. You let out a gutteral wail, your vision darkening at the intense and sudden pain followed by aching relief. You collapsed onto the bed, no longer conscious.

Chan looked at Changbin with concern, "She will be okay, but you need to be okay enough to take care of her when she wakes up. Go grab a drink and whatever else you think she will need or want for when she comes back to."

The younger of the two nodded before dressing himself fully as the older man left the room. He covered you up with his comforter and left in a hurry to gather everything he could possibly think of that brings you comfort and joy. Even going so far as to order a few extras, and calling in a favor from a friend.

The very moment you woke up, you were being showered in kisses. Giggling softly, you pushed your boyfriend back just enough to see his face. "I'm okay baby, I'm sorry if I scared you." All you received back was a dismissive hand wave. With that, he was quick to grab your favorite meal from the nightstand, handing it to you as you propped yourself up against the pillows weakly. "You have nothing to apologize for, baby. I'm so sorry I didn't know how badly I hurt you sooner and I'm so so fucking sorry I hurt you in the first place. I didn't mean to and I promise you I will never hurt you again." Unsure why you giggled at his statement, he shot you a confused look. "Binnie, I know you didn't mean to and I'm sure it won't be the last time this happens. I knew getting with the kpop version of the Hulk could potentially set me up to be wrecked but I wouldn't have it any other way. I love you, and I know you'd never hurt me on purpose. I mean, at least now you can say you literally blew out my back." You shrugged laughing at your own joke a little too hard. He kissed the tip of your head before saying, "oh, I did have something I got for you as a sorry. Well a couple things but I think you'll like this one a lot. I'll be right back!" He left the room for only a couple minutes coming back in with a rather big box. A cute lilac purple bow on top, and purple pawprint patterned sides. Eyes wide, you looked at him excitedly. Opening the box you saw a cute little white and gray fluff ball staring back at you. 'Mew' Your whole heart melted as you took your new little family member out and laid it on your chest nuzzling into it. "Binniiieee, I love her. Thank you." Your eyes glazed over holding in your happy tears so you didn't scare your sweet boyfriend again. You pulled him to you so you could shower his face with kisses. Each one a small reassurance you loved him and were thankful for him. He wrapped his arms around you tightly cuddling you and your new fur baby, placing gentle and loving kisses on your head and shoulders. "I love you baby. Try and get some more rest. I need my princess feeling better soon." You smiled, burying yourself closer into his side, listening to his heartbeat while your new tiny baby purred on your chest. It wasn't much longer until you fell fast asleep, a smile still resting on your face.

[jttw-oc-maiden-of-the-water]

Her Backstory

//Not proofread, and I used google translate for the Chinese, please forgive any spelling errors

@tunadunanana I did involve your Birdie at the end, though I tried to keep it vague enough to allow everything to make sense 😁//

The maiden of the waters, Bèiké as she’s been famously nicknamed, simply came into being one day. She does not know When, or Why, or by Who’s Will did she come to be or why she gained consciousness.

But she did and instantly knew that she was the personification of the world’s waters, from the ocean to the lakes, from the streams to the rivers, even the rain being held by the clouds in the Heavens.

Predictably, this force attracted the attention of many a dragon, storm deity and celestial, feeling the power in the world shift. They worried what someone with such power would be capable of if left unattended. And sought the opinion of the great and merciful Jade Emperor and his infinite Wisdom, and His beloved Concubine, the serene and merciful Lady Mazu, who held dominion over the world’s Seas and Oceans.

The Lady Mazu saw that even personified, she was able to command and sooth the water maiden’s fear, and convince her to flow with serenity once more. And seeing as this didn’t affect her role as the Goddess of the Seas, was satisfied. She turned to her royal husband and asked for an unprecedented favor, one that shocked everyone.

(More under the cut to save room)

The Maiden of the waters was beautiful and - when soothed of her anger and fear - serene and tranquil. And seeing that she had no parents, Mazu decided she wanted to be the ultimate mother of the Seas, and asked her Husband to recognize the Maiden as not just her daughter, but their daughter.

The Jade Emperor, in his wisdom and understanding, both saw the opportunity this afforded him as the ruler of the heavens, having the ocean itself as his recognized child, but also the risks it could carry, as the ocean and storms could be unpredictable, and this Maiden was the personification of that. But having her close as a family member allowed the celestials to better keep a watch over her. And at this point, having already learned their lesson of being too lax with a certain Stone Monkey, knew better than to let such a power go unattended.

So he agreed, and the Maiden of the Waters was given the virtuous title; Yín zhēnzhū gōngzhǔ (銀珍珠公主) ((silver pearl princess)) and was officially made his and the Lady Mazu’s Adopted Daughter. Soon after she was given the nickname Bèiké (貝殼) ((Seashell)) by her New mother. And since then, that is what she called herself.

Despite the initial worries and suspicions, Bèiké proved herself to be a filial and attentive daughter. Honoring both her new father and mother with all the affection and respect their titles and status demanded. Both The Jade Emperor and the Lady Mazu were increasingly satisfied with the Princess. She enriched her mother’s palace with all the treasures the waters that the world created and the halls were filled with the serene music of oceans.

If the lady Mazu’s palace was beautiful before, it was absolutely radiant now and the Lady couldn’t be happier.

They also found joy and amusement in their new Daughters romantic heart and her love of love stories, poems, arts and songs. She loved the idea of love and would often surround herself with such things, and passionately collect and listen to stories and plays about star-crossed lovers, gentle tales of two people finding one another, weeping when hearing the tragic love of the Chang-e and her Hou-Yi. Or even her new Half Sister, the Weaver Maiden, Zhinü (织女) and her lover, Niulang (牛郎), and even went out of her way to ensure the Double Seventh Festival, when they are allowed to meet once a year across the Milky Way was never covered by a rain cloud.

She was overjoyed when her new brothers gifted her Love Birds who sang the most beautiful melodies, she was over the moon when her new sisters came to her with books they had somehow obtained of hero’s going and winning the heart of the princess, or brave soldiers saving the damsels in distress who then found their happily ever after. She would often speak with them in the secret of her rooms about their own ideas for love stories and fantasies of handsome and powerful men to come and sweep them away.

She loved love and looked forward to the day when she would find her beloved and have a family of her own. Going so far as to daydream in her royal mother’s presence about how filial her future children would be and how she’d make sure they honored their grandmother and grandfather as well.

However, one thing that both the Jade Emperor and the Lady Mazu didn’t account for was the absolute connection Bèiké had to the worlds water, and this Earth Bound connection drove her to frequently return to the waters of the mortal world to reconnect with her element. They even found it was impossible to force her to stay in heaven, as she would simply dissolve into a mist and rain back onto earth where she would reform. Seemingly without her conscious consent.

This raised another concern within the heart of the Jade Emperor as he remembered his sister; the goddess Yao Ji (瑶姬). And the mother of his infamous nephew, Erlang Shen. Both he and the Lady Mazu were able to have dominion over the oceans and seas by Claiming Bèikè as their daughter. However, if she were to fall in love, and marry, her husband would gain that control as well. And after seeing how his sister acted in the mortal world, combined with the fact there were times The Jade Emperor couldn’t control Bèiké…

And the fact their the Silver Pearl Princess was a known romantic whom many a celestial were already looking towards as a potential bride and wife…that worry only grew.

He brought this Concern to the Lady Mazu, who agreed his worry was valid, and together, they came up with a plan.

————-

Sealing her Heart

————-

When Bèiké returned to her Mother’s side, bringing gifts to honor her mother and father once more, she was brought instead brought to a grand banquet.

At this time, it had been a year since her Adoption, and her royal parents saw it fit to celebrate it as her Birthday, throwing a feast and celebrating her entrance into the royal family. In which everyone was invited to honor the Yín zhēnzhū gōngzhǔ and make merry! It was a beautiful time and it’s said that the oceans and seas glowed that night with magnificent colors. Bèiké, who normally was satisfied with the quiet tranquility that came with being by herself, allowed herself to get swept up in the celebrations that were held in her name. Thanking her royal parents for honoring her in such a prestigious event.

Afterwards, when she normally would’ve retired to her rooms with the attendants she was given as a Royal Princess to wind down from the night and settle her mind, she was surprised to find herself summoned to her fathers rooms. Even more surprised when she arrived to find her mother there as well.

The Jade Emperor bid her to take a seat and celebrate with him as the Lady Mazu in a more private, family celebration. The Jade Emperor has ordered a special tea to be created for his filial daughter as a reward for her loyalty and attentiveness. She bowed and gave her thanks for her father’s efforts to make her such a thoughtful and special gift. She loved the teas of the palace. They helped settle her heart and mind even on the most chaotic of days.

She toasted her parents and drank the tea her Royal father gave to her, feeling even more honored when her mother poured it herself instead of having an attendant pour it.

It was delicious, a flowery aroma with a perfect mixture of a sweet and tart flavor, unlike anything she had tasted before. It was a most refreshing drink. She finished the cup at her mother’s behest and her father smiled and bid her to have another. And so she did.

However, as the second cup was finished, a wave of exhaustion washed over her, the room spun. She voiced her weariness to her royal parents, and they simply soothed her worries. Letting her know it was simply a side effect of the tea.

As she collapsed, she was still aware of what was happening within her body. What that Tea - No, what that… potion, was doing to her.

It traveled through her body and to her heart. Bèiké, for all she was the personification of the world’s waters, had a Human Heart you see. She could Feel Happiness, Sadness, Joy, Anger, Rage, Hatred, Amusement, Jealousy, Sympathy, Empathy, Fear and Love.

No one ever knew how, when, or why the Personified Waters that was the Yín zhēnzhū gōngzhǔ possessed a Human Heart, but she did.

She felt the Potion wrap around her heart and begin to infuse within it, sealing something within her that she wouldn’t fully understand until later.

She awoke the next morning feeling the same, but knowing that something about her had changed on a fundamental level.

She found she had lost all interest in her romantic poems and plays… the stories that once held her undivided attention now barely touched her fascination…

She no longer held in interest in marriage, she no longer held an interest in making a family or finding her forever love… her romantic heart was gone, replaced with the cool and unattached feeling of indifference.

She found she still loved her family, her loyalty and attentiveness to her royal mother and father remained unchanged and attending to them gave her the same feeling of joy and satisfaction as before. She even loved her siblings the same despite the minimal awkwardness that they all usually shared, interacting with her as an adopted sibling.

She still loved the love birds she was gifted, she still enjoyed the passion behind the music that was played… but she no longer felt the urge to go out and obtain that type of love and passion for herself.

That part of her was simply…. Gone…

——————

Coming to Terms

——————

She released the love birds to enjoy the freedom in her gardens, she gifted the poems and stories away, she stopped requesting the plays and musicals. She became quieter as her desire disappeared. Not seeing the need to speak as much. Becoming a listener instead.

She instead focused on her waters and ensured they were tranquil, with the exception of the storms that fertilized the soil. A task she had always found passion and joy in. She returned to earth more often to be amongst the waters of her being. And within the darkest depths of the deep, she allowed herself to be alone with her thoughts.

She knew the tea she drank that night is what caused her passions for love to cool and disappear. She also knew there was no way to reverse what was done. She may be the Maiden of the world’s waters… but it was a potion made by the Jade Emperor, ordered by him to drink and she did so willingly… she couldn’t undo what had been done…

But, as she thought, she came to an understanding as to why her parents had done what they did… the worry they must’ve felt.

What happened to the tragic Yao Ji was no secret… she had been told in a whispered voice when she first had been introduced to her infamous third eyed cousin and witnessed the tenseness and uncomfortable atmosphere his mere presence invited.

The sealing of her romantic heart had gifted her clarity… had she gotten married, her husband would’ve gained control over her. In her love and devotion, she’d do whatever He’d ask, at the risk of the balance of the world…

That couldn’t be. While she was… hurt, by the trick her Adopted Royal Parents had pulled, she grew to understand and accept their reasoning. What they had done to her. How they had changed her.

She found herself grateful they hadn’t taken her heart entirely, she still felt love for her family and the friends she had made… she still felt her joy and her other emotions. They simply stole her desire… which, was something she felt - now - that she could live without.

She increasingly enjoyed the serenity of her waters, the beauty of how the light danced below the surface, the ebb and flow of the tides and currents, the sounds and songs of the sea. She didn’t return to the jade palace for 3 cycles of the moon.

When attendants, heavenly soldiers, and even a dragon king found her and asked her about her lack of visitation in the palace, she simply responded that she would return to her Mother’s eventually, but that she needed to tend to her waters first, she’d been distracted for too long.

—————

Returning to the Palace

—————

When she did eventually return, she returned as she always did. Bringing gifts and taking the time to honor her parents and greet her people.

Bèiké then had a private audience with her mother where they spoke for a long while. What exactly was said in those rooms is known only to them. But in the end, the attendants witnessed as she gave her mother a hug and told her she forgave her. She later did the same with the Jade Emperor.

That day, the relationship between parents and daughter went relatively back to normal. And a few days Later, the Jade emperor made a public announcement that the virtuous Yín zhēnzhū gōngzhǔ would be an eternal Maiden. Never to be married and forever unattached to matters of the heart. He would accept no proposal for her hand and any attempt to wed her behind his back would result in a swift and painful punishment.

After that shocking announcement that took many a celestial by surprise, Life returned relatively to normal. Bèiké tended to the waters, she did her filial duties, and she filled her days with poetry, novels, spending time with her siblings and the palace scholars. Though her voice was heard less often, becoming more of a listener.

———————

The Journey

———————

Eventually, she met the virtuous bodhisattva, QuanYin, on one of her visits to the Jade Palace, who was impressed by Bèiké’s tranquil nature and asked her if she’d be willing to assist the noteable reincarnation of the Golden Cicada, the Buddhist monk, Tang Sanzang, and his journey to get the Tripitaka Scriptures.

Bèiké said she’d be honored, however there was no way she’d be able to stay by their side the whole journey due to her nature as the world’s water. It’d be easier if they could just summon her if they need assistance.

QuanYin nodded and told her that she will give each of them a magic pearl that will always magically return to them, and that when the pilgrims drop the pearl into the water, and call her sacred title bestowed upon her by her Royal Father, asking her to come to them, she will hear them and be able to transport to wherever they need her.

Bèiké agreed and together with Quanyin, blessed each of the pearls with a bit of her essence so they could connect to her.

She was summoned faster than she could’ve predicted… or maybe she lost track of time within the endless beauty of her waters… but either way when she saw them, they were just as surprised to see her.

They were… funny. And she very quickly decided she liked them. They were flawed and disorganized, but they had loyalty to one another and were beautifully mortal at their core… Well, most of them.

That stone monkey, Sun Wukong as he called himself, the self proclaimed ‘Great Sage Equal To Heaven’ confused her. Though, she thought to herself, perhaps she should’ve expected as much. Stones are usually designed to sink, and yet this one learned to fly through the clouds.

Of course her waters would find themselves confused.

She aided them when they needed her and formed careful friendships with all of them, even the Monkey made of Stone.

Though she formed the closest friendship with a phoenix maiden with many colors who reminded her of a combination of her youngest sisters, and how she was before her heart was cooled, and one Sha Wujing. The Phoenix Maiden, affectionately Nicknamed ‘Birdie’ by her companions, was beautiful. With long ebony hair, embraced in colors that seemed to be weaved by her sister Zhinü herself, she was a vision of the beauty of the heavens. A rainbow in the sky, a piece of the sun that had broken away as she flew.

The river spirit with brilliant Red Hair that reminded her of flames for all he was a Water Yaoguai. He was a large man who had the physique of a warrior but the temper of a learning Buddhist, More humble than the celestial Swine, More mindful than the Stubborn Monkey king. Bèiké and Wujing seemed to bond well with one another, Bèiké even being able to tell his mood whenever he found himself within the water.

She soon began to call him her Brother, and She was his sister. Birdie too, was someone she grew increasingly close with in friendship, and soon, she looked upon and over the Phoenix Maiden as she would her other sisters she felt tenderness and protectiveness over. They spoke of many things at night in camps slightly away from the others, and she confided in them the potion she drank that sealed her heart. How she was hurt, but how she also forgave the ones who tricked her to drink, because despite the trickery and secrecy, Bèiké found herself being the better for it.

When the journey eventually came to an end, she granted them permission to keep her pearls in case they ever wanted to see or speak with her, or if they found themselves in need of Aid. Though she gave both Wujing and Birdie a different, Iridescent Pearl that did the same as the original Pearl, however with the added effect she knew who exactly was summoning her and if they were in distress or not.

———————

Nowadays

———————

Bèiké is still the eternal maiden, the sacred princess who’s rejected a thousand suitors, the tranquil lady of the waters. she loves her territory and the denizens within the waves. Her highest loyalty is to her royal parents and her friends.

However, she understands that sometimes her father’s actions can be cruel, and if it benefits her or those she cares about, she will keep secrets from him, and even use her powers to help obscure his vision in areas using her storms.

She had made peace with her cousin, Erlang Shen, understanding his mother’s strife and his own anger. She had even assisted him a couple times in his own challenges, summoning storms that blew in his favor. And offering a place in her personal palace in the mortal world to rest and sooth his mind.

However, when she had inadvertently overheard his and Wukongs plan to free the Stone Monkey of the Buddha’s tightening headband that was welded to his head, she found herself angered once more.

Because their actions were going to inadvertently hurt the Phoenix Maiden. However by the time she had found Birdie, it was too late, and the fight had already begun. Bèiké found herself forced to stay silent on her knowledge lest she cause her dear friend and sister even more heartbreak.

But she vowed she’d never forgive Erlang and Wukong for the grief they caused that day. Not until the groveled and begged Birdie for forgiveness, and Birdie accepted their apologies…. And maybe even a bit after. She was so angry at both of them.

They didn’t feel the Sobs that wracked Birdie’s body as she held her so tight for fear the woman in her arms would fall apart, they didn’t have to rush to her side as she awoke screaming from the nightmares that plagued her at all hours of the night, they didn’t watch the Phoenix Maiden’s heart break over and over and have to assist in picking up the pieces, and they didn’t have to see her cry so much that her fair cheeks were permanently stained.

Bèiké made sure she was there for it all, and she wanted nothing more than to take her dear sister’s pain away. Knowing she couldn’t was a torture she never could’ve prepared herself for. All she found she could do, was simply be there.

She shielded her friend from the world, made sure storms raged around her palace when her friend had the worst of her crying fits so no one else besides her could hear them, made sure she rehydrated and reminded her to eat.

She even went so far as to invite the citizens of Mount Huaguo to her palace so they could keep the Phoenix Maiden company and help groom her wings. Letting her be surrounded by people who had loved the Monkey King as well, who could share with her the good memories instead of just remembering the bad.

Bèiké made sure that her Palace on the coast became just as much as Birdie’s home as it had been hers. Banishing Erlang from her territory, making sure the rooms Birdie had claimed were off limits to anyone besides the residents of Mount Huaguo, not even her mother on the rare occasions she visited, were allowed in those rooms. She kept all celestials away from the grieving Phoenix Maiden.

She patiently waited for the day that the foolish king made his appearance. Hoping that her dear sister and friend would allow her to slap some sense into his stubborn skull… or if she wanted the pleasure of doing it herself, inviting Bèiké to watch.

So when the monkeys came chattering about some ‘Destine One’ Bèiké grimaced…

It was time….

She asked Birdie if she was sure… did she want to risk her heart again? She was drowning in grief for so long… but ultimately promised that her pearl still works if she ever needs her, and that she would ensure her rooms stay clean and ready for her arrival.

To give this rumored ‘Destined One’ Hell.

Good luck.

Bèiké returned to the waters as her dear sister took to the sky. Allowing the waters to wash away her worries and return to her tranquil state.

And in her serene mindset, simply waited to see what was going to happen next.

[chibishortdeath]

i absolutely love your tags on my post about the mysterious woman, it's nice seeing someone who's as passionate about her as me ❤️

Hehehe, thank u, I’m pacing around all happy about it rn (>.< ). I love Simon’s Quest and how genuinely odd everything that happens in it is.

And the Mysterious Woman doesn’t get talked about very much and y’all are missing out!!! She’s so so so fun to speculate about!

I ran into I think it might have been an old conversation on like Gamefaqs or some other comment section somewhere and there were a surprisingly large amount of people in the conversation who said that when the game came out they assumed that she was meant to be Selena, and that’s just aaaaaa so so interesting to me. And it wasn’t just American fans either, there was someone from Japan who assumed the same. It’s so awesome getting to see the perspectives of people who were there when the game was new and this theory has me going nuts sometimes lol. On one hand it makes sense for the ghost woman in the Belmont family graveyard to be someone from the family, but on the other hand is she really “mysterious” anymore if it’s someone Simon would know?

And why did the Mysterious Woman not mention the Tooth of Vlad and only the other five pieces that she knew would partially summon Dracula instead of the intended burning, burying, and breaking of the curse? Especially if she’s meant to be Selena/Simon’s wife or if you interpret her as Sara? Simon’s Quest really went for the twist of having the call to action character and the one to get Simon out of whatever rut he was in for 6 years in the first place be the first person to lie to him. Which is just so!!!! Aaaa!!!!!!!!!!! This also raises the question: is the Mysterious Woman actually a force of good? Or did she just know that Simon was desperate enough to believe what she was saying to him? I’ve seen some people theorize that she was some kind of Dracula cultist or even a possible form of Death because of this.

Or was she completely right that summoning and killing Dracula is the only way to break the curse? After all a lot of other games in the series that revolve around curses end in Dracula being brought back and defeated. But this is also a strange option as usually when Dracula is resurrected it’s by cultists or Death or whoever else and it’s not a good thing and is just for the purpose of having the evil dark lord do evil things. So that would make this game one of the few scenarios in which Dracula’s resurrection is justified which is so weird I just— thinking about Simon’s Quest to hard is gonna kill me one day lol X,,,,,D.

She also says that one line of “within your own heart, you might be able to defeat the evil if you wager your own life” and thinking about that along with the ominous vagueness of the endings all having different eulogies so similar that you could genuinely make an argument for any of them being the canon ending and the fact that almost all of Simon’s symbolism is related to self sacrifice and martyrdom is uh… interesting. Also a lot of people forget that the area around Castlevania is also cursed, not just Simon. The swamps are messed up, the towns get less saturated in color more empty the closer you get to the castle, and there’s monsters everywhere, this wasn’t entirely a selfish endeavor to save himself.

Anyway, the Japanese manual also talks about the Mysterious Woman in specific ways, appearing and disappearing with the mist. And maybe this is a way to keep her as mysterious as possible, but it’s an interesting choice of words. They could’ve said she walked away into the mist, but they specifically said “disappear”, which is an awfully ghostly thing to do. And it’s also weird cause we kinda do see another character suddenly appear out of thin air in a graveyard in who I like to call the Garlic Guy. The Garlic Guy is also massively under appreciated like what the heck is up with that whole interaction 💀💀💀. Go to the graveyard, only at night, and some hooded figure will suddenly begin to exist in front of you if you lay garlic on the ground and then give you a bag. And then like most things it’s completely unexplained and you just have to keep moving on. I’m thoroughly convinced Simon is just as confused as we are lol. And in a way she is also treated the same way as any other NPC: she does something unexplainable and is never mentioned or important again. The way the game is written I swear it’s designed to make you feel anxious and rushed, ya know like a guy who is actively dying would feel.

And the fact that none of this is ever explained is just so ominous. It adds to the tension of the game and themes of not being able to trust anyone. Nobody trusts Simon, Simon can’t determine who’s trustworthy, there’s NPCs that you don’t even get to know who or what they are, sometimes even the hint books aren’t particularly helpful, things happen and you just have to keep going as to not waste any time.

Hopefully any of this makes sense lol I ain’t reading all that again to check cause I gotta go have lunch cause I forgor about it whoops. Anyway I am very normal about Simon’s Quest and every character in it, please everyone play this game it’s good I promise— (;w; )

Edit: oh my god I did not realize how long this ended up oopsie—

[bumblingbabooshka]

Tuvok says that Vulcan children are very well behaved and have a lot of emotional control by the time they’re ~elementary school aged which makes sense but also makes me want to see what a Vulcan toddler or kindergartener acts like since they can’t be reasoned with as well (can’t really meditate) + are babies and also brimming with near irrepressible violence/emotions.

Vulcan toddler is just quietly accompanying their parent along on an errand. They stop and point to a toy of some sort and ask politely if they can have it. Their parent explains that they have enough toys at home. The toddler immediately throws the tantrum of the century. Just turns into an absolute wild animal in their rage. Other Vulcans are just like “aaa I remember when my children were that age” but any aliens around are like “oh my god is that thing OK??” I imagine even older Vulcan children would have issues with emotional control given that they’re also children! Though they’d of course know they needed to control themselves and behave...sometimes you just slip up. Vulcan children are playing together harmoniously. Then one breaks the established rules of the game. “I made contact with your arm. You are now the chaser.” “You did not make contact with my arm. I dodged your attempt.” “You dodged unsuccessfully. I made contact with your arm.” “I did not.” “You are cheating.” “I believe you are the one cheating.” And an adult has to rush over as one pounces on the other and they both begin screaming and clawing at each other’s eyes. The rest of the children are watching with interest or perhaps grabbing implements to assist their friend.  Little lapses in emotional control would probably be common until they reached like....highschool age. I can imagine an eleven year old Vulcan hearing they can’t sleepover a friend’s home and immediately shattering a vase before apologizing and cleaning it up.  It also seems like bullying would be very prevalent on Vulcan. Spock is canonically bullied frequently and it seems natural that Violent, Extreme Emotions in teenagers would lead to that kind of behavior which isn’t outwardly unacceptable (like crying, laughing, etc) but still satisfies an illogical desire towards cruelty and establishing dominance.  Vulcans schools probably have so many ‘Bullying Is Illogical’ seminars that do nothing and everyone makes fun of behind their teacher’s backs. Two Vulcan teenagers bullying each other, trying to see who has the more emotional reaction. If you cry or get mad you lose. Only babies cry and get mad...seems pretty illogical(cringe).  Vulcans seem to be very focused on respectability so I’m sure that as bloodthirsty teens there would be a lot of accusations and rules...if you hang out with X then Z,H and Y won’t talk to you. If you apologize too soon then they might accuse you of behaving too emotionally and gossip about you...if you don’t apologize at all they might accuse you of behaving too emotionally and gossip about you. It’s very stressful. Tuvok also said when he was a teenager in that one flashback that he was ready to fight over the girl he had a crush on (saying he’d “issue a challenge” or something) so I’m implementing that into my personal understanding of Vulcans...like adults do NOT want these kids to fight but amongst other teens they’re like:  “Seynar is my boyfriend.” “I disagree. He sat next to me during meditation three times this week.” “Only because I was absent.” “Then he is fickle and will be mine soon enough.” And then they challenge one another to a secret duel after school. Dueling to the death is very cool and grownup v_v (teens rarely die from such duels though bc either the other teen stops or someone told an adult). It makes sense to me that teenagers with violent urges would fight one another in a way that they consider acceptably adult. (mimicking the marriage ritual thing or even pon farr...romantic and cool.) Imagine being a teen Vulcan and your crush starts hinting that they have another person who might be interested in them....hmmm.....and you know you’re gonna have to duel for them or lose em. Such is life. Vulcan teens seem like they’d either date a lot (emotional whims) very non seriously (because they’re all betrothed) or date not at all because they’re gonna get married to their betrothed anyway. Loving someone other than your fated match is probably a pretty big trope in Vulcan romance stories...or maybe the opposite? Like someone bad tries to steal your heart but you remain resolute and return to your fated match as is logical. Anyway all this to say that I think Vulcan children and emotional control is something that’s fun to think about. Especially regarding how Vulcan children would act around adults vs other children. Vulcan child to adult: I will do my best to get along with my sibling. (2 seconds later once mother has left)  Vulcan child: You may play with the red toy. If you play with the blue toy I will harm you. Bodily. Meanwhile their older sibling is rolling their eyes like ugh....threatening violence is for babies....now to prepare for my logical and very adult duel for the love of my life whom I have known for three months. v_v

[designernishiki]

I just remembered that mine drives a fucking sports car. of course he fucking does. venture capitalist lookin ass

[ibrokeeverything]

hELP

The gay pirates have taken over my brain. Like, I was already super excited for season two before today, but ever since the trailer came out, I'm completely incapable of thinking about anything else.

So now I'm stuck listening to because the night and rotating the babygirls in my head like a microwave

[flhoarder]

Harry: Make no mistake about it, Satellite-Officer Vicquemare.

Jean Vicquemare, going off on Harry just a moment ago: *sharp pause*

Vicquemare’s authority:

Vicquemare’s authority: Fuck

Vicquemare’s reaction speed: say something. for gods sake. get him with something. alcohol. drugs. hallucinations, anything

Jean Vicquemare, meekly: -uh, alcoholic delirium, visions-

Vicquemare’s rhetoric: No. Stop right there, that delivery was AWFUL

Vicquemare’s reaction speed: change of tactics, get him with his own words, something deranged

Jean Vicquemare: “All must pay…?”

[turtlemagnum]

there's this online recreation of the sans fight that i played religiously back in middle school before i even owned a device capable of running undertale, still up. i got good enough at it that under normal circumstances, i can usually do it first try. a bit of a banging my head against a brick wall thing, but damn did it eventually break. honestly i think doing that before ever actually playing undertale was a bit like goku training in 100x gravity, except instead of landing on namek to fight frieza he went and fought raditz again and just absolutely wrecked his shit. at least, until i got to undyne, still not great at her. god i love her. adhd, getting distracted, i had a goddamn point i was trying to make. so, notice that i said "under normal circumstances" as a caveat. what i would consider not normal circumstances would be, say, playing with fucked up arrow keys. such as, the ones that seem to be on every goddamn modern laptop where up and down are both collectively taking up the same amount of real estate as a single normal key, because apparently right shift needs that extra fucking space. like seriously who the fuck even uses right shift, top 10 useless keys right there, right next to caps lock and most of the function keys. guess i've just gotta suck it up until i can afford to get an actual gamer laptop and not a budget office clunker that i got for the admittedly nice CPU

honestly like, i think my ideal laptop would be halfway between the Ultra Gucci Gamer shit and what i have now. give me like, 16 gigs of RAM, a decent CPU for emulation, a low end but modern and power efficient discrete GPU, and a big fuckin SSD. no RGB shit, just a power waste, though i do like having backlit keys at times i think the more efficient way to go about it would just paint em with something glow in the dark. is glowstick fluid toxic to get your hands on? i remember hearing about a guy who died because he injected that shit at a rave, but i don't know how much of that is This Shit Is Poison vs Dont Put Things That Arent Blood In Your Blood Sacks You Moron, y'know. for some reason radium popped into my head, but after thinking about it for more than an instant i'm like 85% sure that shit's what done killed marie curie, and now i can't help but imagine that's something elon musk would tell his engineers to do. "yeah. just a, uh, gamer key-board. with, radium paint on the lettering. saves power, good for the planet." what was i saying

anyways yeah like. the only other specs i can think of would be just having as many ports as possible, 1080p screen @ 60hz, y'know the bare minimum in Current Year. i will say that my current laptop has given me problems with screens i've never had on a computer before, there have been times where i see something i know for a fact is a different, more saturated color on other screens and having it be barely different from the background. also? i want that motherfucker bulky god dammit, i'm tired of everything being thin and light and having absolute dogshit battery life. i miss when i could charge my gameboy once a week and have it entertain me the entire goddamn time, y'know. i'm lucky if i get half a day of consistent use out of a laptop or my switch without charging it, y'know. to be honest, you should be able to murder someone with your technology. i could kill a man with a gamecube or the PC my dad left me as a kid, if i tried to bash a man's skull open with my laptop the laptop would take more damage than the skull. like don't get me wrong, it'd fucking hurt, but i'm not sure there's any singular component in this thing less than 95% cheap polymer by volume. a goddamn disgrace, lemme tells ya. back in ancient rome we had the technology to build bridges strong enough to still be used today, there are guns from the world wars that you can shoot to this day, you're tellin me you can't make a laptop sturdier than a saltine cracker? well, i'm pretty sure they're mostly designed by crackers, so i guess i can't blame em too hard for their inadequacies. such is lief i suppose (sic)

[autisticlee]

trying to stream on twitch when you are an autistic person who struggles to talk is so hard. you can't make it on there at all if you don't talk constantly, if you don't talk enough or say the right things, if you can't multitasking and converse well with your chat, cant hold conversation with your viewers, etc. normies hate "awkward silences" and will leave your stream if you are quiet for more than a few seconds.

i try to talk but mostly repeat the same scripted things like "oh no" "oops" "don't touch me" "ouch" while playing games. or I do a kind of disjointed narration of what i'm doing like "jump!" "swimming" "aim and shoot"

when people say hi in chat I say the typical scripted "hi how are you" and then struggle to respond to anything else after that, which makes people leave as quickly as they came. I can't improvise talk about things or tell stories like other streamers. I can't have a conversation with chatters.

if I did try to talk about a thing I prescripted (I'll write down things I want to say/talk about and then read them) I have to stop playing my game to talk. people also don't like that. and it takes me like 10 tries to tell the thing even if I read what I wrote down because I mess it up and have to repeat myself.

I prefer to do co-op games in discord calls so other people can talk for me and be entertaining and talk to my chat. but struggling to talk means no one will invite me to play games or accept my invites 😭

then a while back I saw this:

twitch is apparently going to be inconsiderate to disabled streamers. we can't be "consistent" because of bad health days or even months. some of us can't "engage" enough because words and talking hard. ever since I saw this, I haven't streamed. I don't know know if they actually implemented this or are going to but 😬

I might try to stream again when I have time/stop feeling sick. I was streaming genshin impact weekly and daily stuff which might not be most people's interest. I want to stream some art and 3d printed figure painting. I can't talk while doing art stuff so I can play some nice music. but it'll be boring streams 😭 I don't know how to be entertaining and make myself talk a lot 😭

[pebblesmustard]

She Says She's Depressed

There's a certain kind of rejecting my mind does whenever I think I might be in the throes of depression.

As if it can't be that, surely not that, because everything is fine. I wake up, do some movements to remind my body to keep itself in check, eat well and drink water, maybe read something for a while, and everything is fine.

But the pit in my stomach, the sudden sinking feeling of my heart stops me in my tracks whenever I recognize it.

It feels like the last time I'd felt this way, which was months ago and since then I've been working on myself in therapy, and I've felt fine.

But then I read about a self-exiled journalist, how at one point of moving across Europe he texted his then partner that he was lonely, so lonely that he didn't even care about a sexual sort of intimacy anymore, he only wanted "somebody to stroke his hair"...and it wrecks me because I understand the feeling.

And then I feel like the most horrid person alive because somehow I make an exiled journalist's hardships about myself and my more than priviliged life in which I actually have never and probably could never feel that kind of loneliness.

So I tell myself, "everything is fine".

Everything is fine because a line in the book I'm reading just made me break out in laughter. Everything is fine because I laughed at a joke I read on the internet. Everything is fine because there are times where I do feel fine.

But then the protagonist of the book I'm reading is talking about traveling to Europe with her friends the summer after her first year in college and I have a pang of longing in my chest. I remember that not only have I never had that experience, but that I probably never will. I don't have many friends, and with the way things are I won't ever be able to travel unless someone very generous and very fictional just hands me a large sum of money.

And then I remember how I feel so far away, so inadequate of being something to people that I'm convinced my presence is merely tolerated--and then I'm slowly isolating myself.

From my family, my friends across all mediums, even from the hobbies that give me such comfort.

I feel terrible for having such a sour expression around my family. Like I can't tolerate them. Even though I love them. It feels like I'm hurting them.

I feel like a shell of a human.

I remember that I haven't been able to write anything "worthy" in a long time, and then I get mad at myself because what the fuck is a "worthy" writing anyway? Isn't the mere fact that it came from something as intangible as the mind and then put on paper, or just even thought of make it something?

Nevertheless, it scares me that I won't be able to write anything of note again whenever I pick up the pen and still end up with a blank page.

It makes me feel like an outsider.

I tell myself that it's fine.

I know it's fine.

But then I take a look at everything. And everything is not fine.

There's a stench, a terrible rottenness, a decay that I feel powerless to stop.

And so that tiny bit of effort to just hold on slowly fades.

And the moment I start thinking about what the point of it all is the chirping of a sparrow brings a smile to my lips that I'm unable to stop.

One step outside, one moment of feeling the wind sweep around me from head to toe, and I feel like letting go. Before anyone can ask me if I'm okay, I let the tears run free and wait for the inevitable numbness that'll set in, its heaviness waited for with a certain excitement.

But I must feel fine because I still make conversations with friends (I try to). I text someone about something that reminded me of them, ask another if she's feeling better after getting bit by a really nasty mosquito while traveling another part of the globe, sending one a picture that I'm sure will make them laugh.

So everything must be fine.

Calling it depression feels like I'm trying to be part of something that I'm not. Like I'm intruding on a group of people in which every single person knows I'm not being authentic.

And I know it doesn't work that way.

Or, rather, I know that the thought process of depression works exactly that way for some. Like we're impostors even in this aspect of life.

As if, if I tell someone that I feel depressed they'll recount that to someone else with "she says she's depressed"--like what I said is an alleged statement.

And maybe it is.

Because I do feel fine.

I do stop to look at the tree I planted whenever I pass by it on my way home.

I laugh at jokes and I dance to the music I listen to.

I get excited for new art to come.

I also cry because I feel like I won't amount to anything in this life.

I cry because I feel lonely, even though loneliness has never scared me until now. Even though I still find some comfort in it.

I cry because I can't attain the life I crave to live.

And then the shame comes that I'm complaining about what is still a good life. These maybe aren't things to even complain about because there are others that have it way worse in life. (I can hear my therapist saying that I'm minimizing my feelings--and I want to say "No, actually, because I feel like the shame thing is pretty big.")

I mean to say that I'm still grateful for this life. I don't want to seem like I'm not. (My therapist is in my head right now, "Those things can coexist; just because you're feeling depressed doesn't make you ungrateful. There isn't a tally kept on people who have 'good' lives but still feel depressed." "You're not an asshole for feeling this way" is what I want her to say, which makes me feel like more of an asshole somehow.)

Anyway.

These words make it feel like I'm not alone in this, and I know I'm not.

Even if it's not fine now, it will be. At some point. Maybe for a minute today, or an hour tomorrow, or not at all for a while.

Because the sparrows will still chirp, the tree I planted will still stand tall, and there will be more pictures that will hopefully make a friend smile.

[starshine-selfships]

YOURE ALSO SHIPPING WITH AN ANGEL NAMED GABRIEL!?? TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT!!!! 🩷🩷🩷

GOD GOD YES!! Also fun fact I lowkey knew you specifically would see those tags and got excited to see if you would say anything hfjgrgj

Here's the guy of the hour, the week, the YEAR

(The art with the oranges is my own lmao)

I got the game he's from as a gift for Christmas from a friend who really likes it (and I was like yeah!! I wanna play the game too!!) so everything I'm saying has a grand total of a month and a half behind it, and I feel like the short time duration is important to highlight the insanity here kdjffk

ALRIGHT SO spoilers for the entirety of ultra.kill as a game bc he's integral to the overall plot, but some background before Gabby, the game is centered around a robot (controlled by the player) descending down through 9 layers of hell a la dante's inferno style, bc this particular machine is blood powered and mankind has been completely wiped out (partially by war, partially by something that hasn't been made 100% clear yet), so you're just going around slaughtering everything in sight, with the chunkiest graphics known to man along the way.

Gabe's role here is to step in and try to stop you bc you're basically a walking abomination to all that is holy, Gabe is the angel that sends people to hell and is also the one chosen to carry out the will of god so he's also done a lot of killing to do that; he loses to the machine, gets so mad he curses at you (calls you an insignificant fuck) and then leaves, but we see a little behind the scenes, where we learn he's never lost a fight like this and the rest of the angels call it heresy; they sever his connection with divinity and tell him he has 24 hours to fix everything or he'll die. So naturally, next fight he's pissed as hell, and starts out MAD, yelling and threatening, but as it goes on, he starts having fun and laughing and taunting, and when he loses again, he says he feels relieved and needs time to think. He starts introspecting and starts questioning everything he's been told after he realizes he wasn't feeling hatred, but a sort of passion in the challenge of the fights. He starts asking himself if the angels he followed were actually in the right, and ends up killing them all, accepting that he's going to die but that he'll die not only having been freed from the constraints placed on him, but also having freed heaven itself from the angels that basically held it hostage with their power.

He's also as close to trans as you can get without explicitly calling him such! The devs discussed angels and pronouns in a recent stream and said they wanted angels to have no pronouns if possible, but then realized that they needed to gender Gabe when another character wrote a diary entry about him, so they settled on pronouns as a mark of angel status, which means that he didn't originally use he/him, but picked it up later and continued to use it no matter what; the other angels called him "it" after the took his divinity, but the overall narration still uses masculine pronouns for him, so it comes with the implication that he's still exactly who he knows he is, no matter what is said about him, which. as a trans man. good lord fhsjg the trauma of his arc hits very close to home for me and that was part of what propelled him into the spot he has on this blog.

The other thing that got him here was. and there really isn't any other way to say it. This man turned everyone into rabid animals, I have never seen so many people look at a character and desire him so violently, everyone wants to do unspeakable things to this man and it is so funny hdsjgks his VA will also voice pretty much anything in-character as well, so there's a lot of unhinged bullshit that makes for an absolutely incredible image of this man. He's a little uptight at first and throws a fit when things don't go his way, he seems like the exact kind of man that would be kind of silly, this man would struggle to peel an orange, throw it at a wall, and then later hang his head in his hands about it. This man would be able to speak multiple languages but would somehow mispronounce every single word as he goes. He's an astounding character and he's also kind of pathetic and something about all these factors just. lobotomized me. There is a gay little angel where part of my brain should be and I've just accepted it. I had a gay dream about him one single week after I saw him in game, the grip he has on me is UNREAL and I've fully accepted it.

He gives the very fun aspect of "is not human and has no idea what humans need or how they act", which makes him utterly hilarious to me, I wanna see this man try to preheat the oven, he is trying so hard to cook something for me and he is burning it so badly, he does NOT know what a car is and is frankly too wary of it to even consider getting in it. People also arrived at the consensus that he's probably very tall, it's been confirmed that there are no canon heights in the game, but everyone has agreed that Gabby is at least 7 feet tall and it is the funniest thing on earth to me. Very large and somewhat confused angel who means the best trying very hard in his new environment. Oh my god wait when the developers had that stream I mentioned they also talked about Gabe for a bit in regards to his personality bc in-game he saved someone from being swept away in the river styx (now an ocean after an influx of souls), and they were so grateful they added a fully functional hologram of him onto their ship, saying the lines he'd said when he'd saved them, and the devs said that they'd wanted that to be a glimpse into what Gabriel is like when he's not immediately targeting you as an enemy or fighting, and the specific words they used were "he's kind and loving" and that short-circuited my brain immediately upon impact.

He is The Guy Ever, he's basically trans and 70% of the people who drew him gave him top surgery scars even before the devs talked about gender, he's got religious trauma and guilt, he's too tall and has probably never read a book outside of the bible, he giggles and whimpers, he is considered to be one of if not the most wifeable character in the entire game, he has an official body pillow, I want to put him in pretty little outfits, I want to hold his hand and take him to the beach, I want to pin him against a wall, he is. Such A Guy,, thank you so much for asking me about him he makes me feel so insane hsgjsdl

[destinyandcoins]

whenever my sister sends another one of her 2-5 minute long audio note messages or someone shares a tiktok/reel in the group chat

[proustianrevelry]

absolutely hilarious that the head of UNIT literally went "The Doctor, please help! We can't press the big red Save Humanity button until you give us explicit permission to do so!"

a) Pathetic

b) If you do start a war by shooting that satellite down, do you really think "the wacky alien who visits us every Christmas gave the OK" is going to make South Korea or the UK or the US or the UN less mad abt it???

c) what the fuck were u gonna do if he said "no"

d) if i had a nickel for every part of this special that was also a trashfuture bit, i'd have 2 nickels, which isn't a lot but it's odd that it happened twice.

twee little German-speaking man who keeps "ge-[English word]-ing" verbs

the british media acting like the way to solve issues is for the PM (or doctor, in this case) to go to his little console and flip a big switch labeled "STOP BREXIT" or "UNFUCK ECONOMY" and just hasn't done it yet for some reason

[todayisafridaynight]

Okay hear me out. You know how Kiryu's codename is Joryu? What if Jo is working with Kiryu on whatever his Top Secret Mission is and they've just swapped syllables to come up with their codenames so Jo's codename is Ki and actually no I can't even keep this up as a bit

his name's fuckin KI 😭😭

[drown-the-dormouse]

[endlessburningdarkness]

how to go from daydream to draft:

begin by daydreaming as you normally do, or just after you've finished doing so. write down every thought you have. one after another. do not reread. do not stop for spelling mistakes. just dump out every thought. this is called stream of consciousness writing. you can do this for every scene you need a first draft for.

struggling to draft the scene? try to daydream about it. start thinking about how it would look, feel, what the characters would say, act it out in your head and then write out the stream of your thoughts as they arrive.

by now you have a few scene dumps. you may be tempted to go back and edit. do not do this expect for obvious spelling mistakes. do not read closely and start thinking "i need to rework this sentence." that is for later. now you're in the zone. draft more scenes. or work out what the next scene needs to be, scaffold it with a few comments. this will be the inspiration for your next deliberate thought stream that you will write out. repeat this process until you have the whole draft.

now that you have a draft or part of a draft you get to do this very fun thing called revise until you're happy. sweep through your draft with specific goals each time. one sweep to fix spelling/grammar. another for character voice. another for plot. repeat until you're happy with it.

leave it alone. just leave it for a bit. at least a few hours or days or even weeks. forget it exists. this will allow you come back with fresh eyes. then you can do your revisions with an eagle eye. now you may realize you need to add/remove scenes. you know how to get the first version down. close your eyes and daydream at your desk if that's what takes!

remember that fiction writing is persuasive writing. you are trying to persuade the reader to care about what happens next, the character's, the world, the feelings. as you're revising, consider whether you are persuaded. is the feeling/thoughts you wanted to provoke being felt by you when you read it? when working with beta readers, be sure to communicate what you're trying to convey so they can tell you if you've been successful or not.

this got a bit beyond getting the first draft done. hope you found it helpful.

bonus tip: check the spellings of names and places and other nouns that are not typically used, like the name of a magic tool!