#it did nothing about his approval rate but it made me happy

[sugusearrings]

( ' glass children. ' )

violet wrists and then her ankles, silent pain. then he slowly saw their nightmares were his dreams. monster, how should I feel? creatures lie here, looking through the windows i will hear their voices. i'm a glass child, i am hannah's regrets.

— summary: with the star plasma vessel dead, satoru and suguru need you (fem!reader) to lead them to their next path. — genre: angst. heartbreak. — playing: monster by meg & dia — note(s): i'm a sucker for what ifs. i love what ifs. good and bad. i thought about this what if a lot. i wanted to write about this since halloween and didn't have time to post it. i just know suguru and satoru are better than me cause everyone would have gotten this smoke. that's all imma say. anyways, mentions of blood & death. probably some spelling errors here and there. — word count: 866

Those beautiful cerulean blue hues still sparkled as the light down on them.

But the spark of life was gone. They were dull. Lifeless. Emotionless. You never saw them like this before.

You could feel the anxiety swallowing you whole. If someone looked closely, they can see your legs trembling slightly. The two boys in front of you were having a brief conversation but you couldn’t hear it. You couldn’t hear anything over the loud sounds of your heart rate picking up at a rapid pace. You couldn’t even hear the round of applause the strangers that crowded around the white hair teenager who held the lifeless body like he did the first time meeting her.

They were clapping for Satoru. Fucking clapping.

You just stared at the crowd in disbelief. What kind of people would approve of this? What kind of people are happy over this? The death of a young girl.

A young girl you considered your friend.

Monsters...monsters... “Suguru...should we kill these guys? The way I am right now I doubt I’d feel anything.” His voice was hoarse. But what made your heart ache was hearing no emotion in his tone. It matched his stare. Dull. Lifeless. Emotionless. Your eyes went over to Suguru. His back was faced to Satoru but you saw his almond shaped eyes were as wide as they can be but soon he pulled himself back together. He always does. He has too. “No. There’s no point. It’ll be dissolved soon enough.” His voice mimic the tone Satoru set. He began to walk towards the door to get out of there. He was sick of the clapping and the smell of the dried blood that lingeried. He was sick of this. He was sick of this life. He was sick of death. He was sick of curses. “No point, huh? Does there really need to be any point to it?” Satoru asked or stated. You couldn’t really tell. You went to follow behind Suguru like a lost puppy but Satoru called out your name.

“Name...”

"Y-yes...Satoru?" your gentle voice trembled.

"What do you think we should do?" Satoru asked you. His eyes didn’t look at you. They just looked straight ahead into nothing. Suguru's eyes went over to you almost forgetting you were even there. Your eyes was puffy and red from crying. You were the emotional one out of the three. That's why Satoru would tease you about being weak. You were a crybaby. But Suguru didn't see an issue with it, he likes you like this. So did Satoru but he wouldn't openly admit it. You reminded him about those certain emotions he swore he couldn’t feel anymore. "Name...what should we do?" Suguru also asked willing to do anything you said. The self proclaimed brains of this trio couldn’t think straight or logically. So it was up to you.

The boys looked over at you for an answer. An answer you didn't have. This wasn't fair. These higher ups using you children. Not caring if you killed one another or died in front of each other. You loved your best friends. Especially Satoru and Suguru, willing to do anything to protect them. Even Riko. They were the only family you have. But would the higher ups mourn you? Would the higher ups sink into a dark hole of depression? Would the higher ups get revenge on you? Or would they replace you like a piece of livestock. They would probably replace you in a matter of days.

They probably would assign Satoru and Suguru a mission while your ashes are still warm.

Satoru and Suguru.

The thought of leaving them behind made you feel sick at the pit of your stomach. How would Satoru handle it? You knew Suguru would break in a matter of days. He bottles so much inside of him it would just burst out. Would they keep it together if you were to die? Or would they lose it themselves.

You know you would lose it if either of them or both of them were to die. Leaving you all alone. To defend yourself. To love yourself. You couldn’t imagine a world without them. The three of you were glued to each other, couldn’t really function without the other.

You could feel the anger replacing the fear and anxiety. On the inside your morals and humanity was being teared apart, stripped away from you the more you stared at Riko's lifeless body in Satoru's arms covered by a thin white cloth. "Name..." Suguru called out to you once more. There wasn’t much time to make a decision. "Kill them," you finally answered losing all emotions you had that day, "kill them all." That's all Satoru needed to hear. His lips formed a wicked grin as Suguru silently summoned the rainbow dragon. You stood watched the blood being splattered on the walls and floors. The screams made you smile like that day on the beach with your best friends.

That’s where your mind was. The day on the beach with Riko and Satoru laughing at the sea cucumber while you, Suguru, and Misato were on the beach towels just watching them with smile of your faces.

[dystopicjumpsuit]

A Question of Seman-dicks

A/N: I wrote this under the influence of alcohol, edibles, and the funniest conversation in the history of Discord. Happy Friday!

Pairing: Hardcase x GN!Reader (platonic with a twist)

Rating: T

Wordcount: 960

Warnings and tags: suggestive language, terrible puns

Hardcase spotted you striding purposefully down the corridor of the Resolute, and he sped up to try to catch up with you. You turned a corner abruptly, and by the time he rounded it, you were nowhere to be found. The corridor was empty; there was nothing there but a bank of escape pods. He peered into the porthole of each one until he finally spotted you, pacing back and forth in the small space and talking animatedly. Intrigued, he opened the hatch.

You whirled to face him, guilt written plainly across your features, but when you recognized his distinctive tattoos, you relaxed.

“Oh, it’s you,” you sighed with relief. “Thank the Force.”

“What are you doing in here?” he asked curiously.

“Nothing!” you said. His expression was dubious, and you knew he wouldn’t let it drop until you told the truth. “Hiding.”

He gave you a sympathetic look. “Admiral Ice Queen?”

“I came in here to scream,” you admitted sheepishly.

“Good choice,” he said. “Conveniently close to your office, private, and most importantly, soundproof. I approve of your strategy.”

“Except I’m not supposed to be in here, and if anyone caught me, I’d be in huge trouble.”

“Someone did catch you,” he pointed out.

“Yeah, but you wouldn’t rat me out,” you replied. “You’re more likely to come in and hide with me.”

“Great idea!” he said with a grin. He stepped into the pod and sealed the hatch, then flopped down on the floor and patted the spot next to him. “Tell me all about it.”

“You know there are perfectly good seats in here,” you said.

“True, but if I sat in one of those, there wouldn’t be room for you next to me, and you look like you could use a hug.”

“Good point,” you said, sitting down with a thump.

He immediately draped his arm over your shoulders, and you leaned against him. “So what did the bad-miral do this time?”

“More of the usual,” you replied. “I swear she sets me up to fail on purpose, and then she takes an evil delight in being a massive Taungsday about it.”

“Taungsday?” he asked, baffled.

“You know, a C-U-Next-Taungsday?”

“I don’t get it,” he said.

Even though nobody was around, you leaned in and whispered the explanation in his ear. He reared back in surprise.

“I don’t think you’re supposed to say that word,” he said.

“What word would you prefer?” you asked, amused at his reaction, but still too upset to laugh.

“Lady garden,” he replied.

You snorted. “Seriously?”

“It’s more respectful,” he said with dignity.

“I don’t want to be respectful!” you complain. “I want to call her a cu—”

“Love tunnel!” he exclaimed, interrupting you before you could get the word out.

That time, you actually laughed. “What is this, a bodice ripper? I don’t need a romantic euphemism for a—”

“Hidden treasure!” he cut you off. “Or cupcake! Those are delicious.”

You let out an inelegant cackle, and he gave you a wounded look that only made you laugh harder. 

“Hardcase, I had no idea you had so many words for a woman’s—”

“Honey pot?” he asked insouciantly. 

“You can just say—”

“Nether regions?” he offered. “I don’t like that one. It sounds spooky. Like some vast, uncharted part of space.”

You tried to stifle your laughter, but it came out as an embarrassing snort, which only made you laugh harder.

“Still, it’s better than ‘penis fly trap,’” he mused. “But not as good as flower. You know, because it has petals and is also used in reproduction. I would definitely rather put my tallywacker in a flower than in a nether region. Higher probability of survival.”

By this point, you had both hands clapped over your mouth to try to muffle your shrieks of laughter as tears streamed down your face. You couldn’t even remember why you’d hidden in the escape pod in the first place, much less why Hardcase was regaling you with a comprehensive listing of every colloquialism known to the galaxy for a—

“Notorious V.A.G.,” he said. “Whoever came up with that one had obviously never felt the touch of a woman.”

You doubled over and buried your face against his chest as you howled with laughter, so you missed his pleased smile when he realized he’d successfully distracted you from your horrible boss. Unfortunately, you’d been gone long enough that you knew your absence would soon be noted.

“I wish I could hide in here with you for the rest of the day,” you gasped once you caught your breath.

“Me, too,” he said, giving your shoulders a squeeze. “Probably ought to get back to it, though.”

You nodded and wiped away your mirthful tears, hoping that you looked at least somewhat presentable. Hardcase stood and offered you his hand, pulling you to your feet with ease, and then he opened the hatch of the escape pod. The two of you spilled out into the corridor, only to run smack-dab into Jesse and Kix.

Jesse took one look at your disheveled appearance and punched Hardcase in the shoulder with a devilish grin. 

“Nice, vod,” he said. “You finally made your move.”

Hardcase looked mortified. “That’s not— We weren’t—”

“Relax, brother, we won’t tell the Atrocious Admiral,” Kix laughed. “I’m just glad you decided to do something other than pine away after all this time.”

Hardcase stared at you with panic in his eyes as he watched understanding dawn on your face. 

“I—” he began.

On impulse, you leaned in and gave him a kiss on the cheek. 

“Thanks for everything, big boy,” you said. “Be sure to stop by my bunk later, and I’ll show you how well I can swallow your baloney pony.”

[its-jaytothemee]

Until I Met You - Chapter 2

Chapter 2: The Party

Pairings: Halsin x Tav

Word count: 3,924

Rating: Currently M, will be Explicit in later chapters.

Read on AO3

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Summary: A slow burn Tav and Halsin romance fic about their relationship forming between the major events of Baldur's Gate 3, and probably a little bit after too. Explores Tav's friendships with some of the other companions, but mainly Karlach. Lots of longing and fluff, including plenty of soft Halsin moments.

Tags: Slow burn, hurt/comfort, love confessions, eventual smut, light angst, implied past rape/non-con

A/N: After starting another playthrough specifically to romance Halsin, I decided to write some additional details of how their relationship forms throughout the game. Not sure how many chapters there will be yet...we'll see where the game takes me :) There will be POVs from both Tav and Halsin throughout the fic. Enjoy!

Tav retrieved one of her arrows from the many corpses strewn about the courtyard. The inside of the temple was just as bloody of a sight. Three True Souls had been defeated and the remaining goblins slaughtered at their hands. One of the leaders lingered in her mind – Minthara, the drow. When their minds mingled, Tav saw something in her memories that she couldn’t quite place. She wasn’t sure how many more of these cultists they would be facing, but she had started to feel uneasy during this past battle. It dawned on her that the only difference between her adventuring party and these True Souls was the strange artefact they carried. Had they not been chosen for this mysterious protection, they would be meeting the same fate at the hands of a different group of adventurers.

She looked back around at her companions. Astarion was limping his way between all the bodies, checking their pockets with disturbing efficiency. Gale was sitting on the ground, leaning against a wall while catching his breath and favoring a twisted ankle. Karlach was helping Tav gather arrows and other weapons around them. A golden glow enveloped their bear companion, transforming him back into an elf.

“You did it. You actually did it.” He was smiling at her, his voice full of admiration. “There are no words to thank you for what you have done today, my friend.”

“Think nothing of it, I was happy to help.” She was still out of breath from the fighting, a small trail of blood tickled her cheek.

“It was everything.” One of his large hands rested on her shoulder. “Forgive me, but I must make haste back to the Grove. I can…see to some matters there and we can discuss your next steps further once you’re able to meet me.” He placed his fist across his chest with a small bow of his head.

Tav nodded her reply as he wildshaped into a rat and ran away.

“Let’s do another sweep of the place, make sure there’s nothing useful that we should take.” She suggested, gaining a small whoop of approval from Astarion.

They did a full sweep of the temple, eventually finding a secret entrance into the Underdark. Tav took note of that for later, she thought she had heard a rumor of a passageway from below that led to Moonrise. Only if we have to go there, she thought to herself. She was desperately trying to hide her anxiety from her companions. Halsin had sensed it when they were talking, but she sensed something from him as well. More of a deep sadness than anxiety.

Luckily, they also found plenty of useful items scattered about. Healing potions, weapons, armor, an abundance of camp supplies and no small amount of gold. They loaded Karlach up with as much as she could possibly carry before making the trek back to the Emerald Grove.

Once they arrived, they took the time to sell some of the extra equipment they had found, exchanging for additional potions and elixirs. Tav was being constantly stopped for one tiefling or another to offer their gratitude. She smiled and accepted their thanks, feeling awkward about being in the spotlight. Being alone by choice for so long made it overwhelming to be the center of attention again. As a new pair of hands seemed to touch her with every step she took, a hazy memory rushed forward to the front of her mind.

She was standing in a vast ballroom, wearing a light, elegant gown. The small circlet adorning her temple was light as a feather but weighed heavily on her shoulders that night. The room around her was filled with colorful patrons. All of them dancing and spinning together, slowly getting drunk on the extravagant selection of wines. She was constantly being pushed into one suitor or another, each doing their best to woo her into their arms. Their wandering hands were not as subtle as they thought, and she had to resist the urge to break their fingers on many occasions. If she caused too much of a scene, Father would not be pleased. Just as she thought she would have to headbutt the handsy nobleman groping her ass, her true knight in shining armor came twirling to her rescue.

Tev’aron, her older brother. He slammed his hips into the drunk noble, acting equally as drunk. She couldn’t help but giggle since she knew for a fact he would never partake. He offered multiple slurred apologies before easily taking his dancing position.

“Hello, Ria.” He flashed his mischievous smile at her, his drunken façade gone. “Your suitors this evening are serious lightweights. Father hasn’t even brought out the liquor yet. Best to pass on this batch as well, they’ll never keep up with this family’s drinking.”

“My hero.” She rolled her eyes at him. Tev was her best friend, always swooping in to rescue her when her noble duties got too overwhelming. And by noble duties, she meant being fondled by strange men.

They danced together in silence for a while, Tev earning dirty looks from the men around them. His ivory curls bounced lightly around his face as they moved around the dance floor.

“Tav’ahria…” He said quietly. “Why do you put up with this? You’re more than just a pretty collectible to be paraded about. You could snap the necks of half of the men in here before anyone realized what had happened. Have you thought more on my suggestion?”

It was all she had thought about for the last tenday. Tev’aron was planning on running away to join the Harpers, and he wanted her to come with him.

“I don’t know, Tev. If Father ever caught up with us…” She could see her parents on the other side of the ballroom, laughing with some diplomat from Cormyr.

“He doesn’t care enough about us to have us followed.” Tav’ahria could taste the venom in her brother’s words.

“Just promise me you’ll think about it, Ria.” He continued, his tone softening. “I can’t bear the thought of leaving you here to be married off to the highest bidder. You deserve more than that.”

She closed her eyes and hugged her brother tightly, desperate to keep a few more moments to herself before she was forced back into her flirtatious mingling.

“Alright, alright. That’s quite enough. The poor woman is bruised to the hells and back, she doesn’t need your extra hands on her.” Astarion’s voice cut through her daydream. Tav snapped back to the present, staring at him in surprise. He was bouncing around her, slapping away hands from her arms and shoulders.

“Astarion? What are you doing?” She asked quietly, still a little disoriented from her thoughts.

“Hm? Oh, nothing I just noticed you were maybe a tad overwhelmed by the affection coming your way. I can’t have all of this attention going to your head, darling.” He smiled sweetly at her, but there was something in his expression that Tav couldn’t quite place. For just a moment, it was like Tev’aron was standing in front of her again, fighting off unwanted advances.

“Of course. Thank you.” She smiled weakly back at him, fighting the tears stinging her eyes.

“Speaking of bruises,” she poked his arm lightly, “we should get back to camp soon. A couple more and you could easily pass for a drow.” He was not amused by her joke, but Karlach was cackling behind them.

“Fine. Let’s find your new lover and head back to camp.” He shot back at her.

“Excuse me?” Tav could feel a blush moving across her face.

“Oh please, Tav. You obviously wanted to climb that brawny druid like the tree he is.” He continued teasing.

“You’re really close to getting those last few bruises my soon-to-be drow friend.” Her gritted teeth were causing her jaw to ache. Astarion thought better of pushing her and turned away with a cheeky smirk.

Tav groaned as she felt her skin getting warmer across her face and chest.

“For what it’s worth, soldier…I think he might have liked you too.” Karlach had walked up beside her, hand hovering supportively above Tav’s shoulder so she wouldn’t get burnt.

“Ugh let’s just wrap up here and get back to camp. We have a party to prepare for after all.” Tav smiled at the large tiefling, surprised by how quickly she had gotten attached to her.

They wandered further into the Grove just in time to see Halsin finishing up a heated conversation with Kagha.

“…you may stay but consider yourself a novice anew.” Halsin’s voice had taken on a much more imposing tone compared to when they spoke in the goblin camp. “You have forgotten the ways of the druids.” He dismissed her with a wave of his hand.

“Yes, Master Halsin.” Kagha gave a small bow before walking away.

“You’ll have your hands full with her.” Tav called from behind him.

Halsin’s expression immediately softened when he saw her, causing Tav’s heart to skip a beat.

“The understatement of the century, my friend. Misjudgments aside, the Emerald Grove will have need of her. Still, nature prevailed on this day. The Grove stands, and I have you to thank.” He reached out and put a hand on her shoulder. She wanted to say something to him, but caught Astarion peeking out from behind Halsin, grinning at her. Tav glared back at him.

“So, what happens now? Will you still come with us to Moonrise?” She was trying to keep her voice from sounding too hopeful.

“Yes of course, I’ll join you in your camp for the celebration later and come morning, I will be at your side.” He still had his hand on her shoulder. His smile was making her knees feel weak. Astarion and Karlach could barely contain their giggles at his last statement. Their lips sputtered as they tried, and failed, to hide their laughter. Gale looked between all of them, confused. Halsin walked away with a small nod.

“I can’t help but feel I may have missed something while I was dead.” Gale was searching each of their faces for a way to decode their inside joke. Astarion hopped up next to him and slung an arm around his shoulders.

“Let me catch you up, my friend.” He dragged Gale alongside him, Tav just buried her face in her hands.

They wrapped up their business at the Grove, talking to Nettie and Rath who each gave them rewards for their efforts. Tav helped the last few straggling tieflings to pack up their remaining belongings. After a few more heartfelt thanks thrown their way, the four of them started the trek back to camp.

***

The sun was just starting to set as Halsin wandered into the small encampment. He had taken some extra time to say his goodbyes at the Grove. A letter was sent to the High Forest to request his replacement as Archdruid, a decision that brought him more shame than he expected. Not because he was leaving his position, but because of the overwhelming relief he felt after sending the letter. He never coveted that position, it was thrust onto his shoulders, but now he couldn’t help but feel guilty. Like he was abandoning those who had looked up to him for years.

Around the camp, it looked as if most of the refugees had already arrived, but there were some unfamiliar faces as well. He saw a Githyanki woman engrossed in the act of sharpening her sword, the shrill sound cutting through the various conversations. Another man with dark skin stood alone just off the edge of the camp. He looked like another tiefling but something was different about him. There was a young half-elf woman who appeared to be brooding into a glass of wine. From what he could gather, they had to be the other unlucky souls who had been kidnapped alongside Tav. Quite the curious group to be travelling together.

He looked around at the smiling faces, finding a feeling of relief and joy in them that he hadn’t seen in these people since he met them. It had been so long since he had witnessed the kindness of a stranger that he had seen today. His eyes scanned the camp until they found Tav. He watched as she stood next to Zevlor, wine glass in hand, waving her hand slowly in front of her, undoubtedly trying to waive off any praise for her good deeds today. She had changed out of her bloodied armor into a blue, sleeveless outfit. The corset-like shirt accentuated her hips, showing off more of her figure than he could see in the leathers she had been wearing. Her muscular back and arms were highlighted by the warm light of the sunset, not to mention her hair which was now tumbling freely down her back. The color and luster of the strands put the most beautiful of pearls to shame. Desire ached in his chest for the first time in years, a warm feeling that made his heart race. He felt like a lovestruck 60 year old again, he couldn’t stop staring at her, taking in every curve of her body. She suddenly turned around and caught his stare. He could feel his cheeks redden, yet he still couldn’t take his eyes off her. A huge smile spread across her face, making his heart skip a beat.

Oakfather preserve me…

She turned back to Zevlor and said something unintelligible before walking towards him. He shuffled awkwardly in place, suddenly unsure of what to do with his hands. They tugged nervously at pieces of his clothing as he averted his gaze towards the ground.

Oh, stop it you old fool. Nothing can happen anyway. You must stay focused.

When he looked back up, Tav had been stopped by a few more grateful refugees. He just barely noticed how she flinched at their touches, obviously uncomfortable by the contact. All her injuries from the day seemed to have healed properly, he couldn’t see any trace of bruises or cuts. With each person that reached out to touch her, the smile on her face twisted, no longer reaching her eyes. It looked flat and lifeless, like a mask. Eventually, she broke away again and continued towards him.

“I was starting to worry that you had changed your mind.” She called out once she was close enough.

“Nonsense, I just had a few additional matters to attend to at the Grove. It seems my absence had a larger impact than I had hoped.”

She gave him a curious look.

“It’s nothing for you to worry about, I promised you my aid and you shall have it.” He didn’t have the energy to explain himself to her right now.

“Okay, well if you want, I could introduce you to the rest of the camp. I’m sure the others are anxious to meet you.” She held out her hand. He started to reach out for her but thought better of it.

“That’s very kind of you, but I’m sure you have many other pleasantries to dole out this evening. It would be rude of me to keep you for too long.” He tried to smile back at her, but her expression fell slightly and her hand dropped back to her side.

“I uh…I do want to apologize for earlier today.” She ran a hand nervously through her hair.

“Whatever for?” Halsin was racking his brain trying to figure out what she could have done to warrant an apology.

“When we first met, I wasn’t exactly uh…subtle. I can’t help but feel that I made a real ass of myself. I’m not always great with first impressions.” Her face had turned slightly pink, now matching the color of her eyes. Halsin relaxed slightly. “When we were sent to find an all-knowing Archdruid, I was sort of expecting an old man. Not someone young like you.”

He let out a snorting laugh at that.

“Young? You are too kind. It’s not exactly a word I would use to describe my age.”

“Oh please, I put you at hardly middle age for an elf.” She was smiling again, a real smile, the sight caused another wave of warmth to wash over him.

“Regardless, let me put your mind at ease. I judge others based on their actions, and yours have spoken clearly for you. You have nothing to apologize for, my friend.” He placed a reassuring hand on her arm, noticing that she didn’t flinch away from him. “As long as we’re being honest, I was just as shocked to see a lovely noble elf to come to my rescue in a dirty goblin camp.” She blushed again.

“Now go on, enjoy yourself. Don’t waste your evening talking to me. There are many other grateful people who wish to spend time with you.”

“Take your own advice, come have a drink with me. I’d like to get to know you if we’re going to travel together.” She was still smiling sweetly at him as she placed her hand over his.

His heart started to race. How he yearned to feel a sense of companionship again, a luxury he couldn’t afford often in the last century or so.

Careful, Halsin. You cannot tolerate such a distraction now.

“Not unless you want to hear my terrible singing, or a love confession to the first soul that crosses my drunken path.” He chuckled as he slowly removed his hand from her arm, she laughed, and the sound sent a shiver down his spine.

“I fail to see the problem. I grew up in Baldur’s Gate, that was a daily occurrence for me.”

“I wouldn’t doubt it.” The words escaped his lips before he could stop them, causing his breath to catch. Tav’s expression shifted, a playful smile pulling at the corners of her mouth.

“Well, there’s other things we could do to get to know one another. If you’re not up for talking or drinking.” She chewed on her lower lip as she held his gaze.

No, not subtle at all.

He could barely control the grin threatening to spread across his face. It wasn’t often that potential partners were so forward with him. A small chuckle started in his chest making its way past his lips.

Silvanus give me strength…

“I have no doubt you could think of something. You strike me as extremely…resourceful.” He took a deep breath. “But as I said, there’s many others here who wish to spend time with you. I must not keep you all to myself, as enjoyable as that may be.”

“I understand.” She said with a small smile. “I’d best go claim some of the wine before it runs out, everyone seems particularly thirsty tonight. We’ll talk in the morning?”

“Of course. Oakfather preserve you, friend.” He gave a small bow of his head before she turned away.

If Tav was disappointed, she hid it well. He kept watching her as she strode through the camp accepting handshakes and compliments, as she checked in with each of her companions, and then finally until she went and sat by Karlach holding two large bottles of wine. The rest of the evening was uneventful, he allowed himself an evening of peace watching the happy scene before him. He longed to feel as carefree as those around him, but it would have to wait. For a hundred years he had been seeking favor with Silvanus and he couldn’t lose that focus now, not even for such a sweet temptation as Tav.

***

Tav walked over to the small box containing several bottles of wine. Hopefully her embarrassment wasn’t too obvious to everyone else around her. She couldn’t quite figure Halsin out, he seemed interested in her, but it was like something was holding him back. Two large bottles of firewine caught her attention. She grabbed them both and made her way over to the riverbank where Karlach was sitting.

“Want some company?” Tav asked, the wine held out in front of her.

“As long as one of those is for me.” Karlach smiled up at her and patted the ground next to her. Tav took a seat and handed over one of the bottles.

“What are you doing out here, soldier? I figured you’d be wrapped up in vines tonight or whatever weird stuff druids are into.” She uncorked the bottle with her teeth and took a large drink.

“Eh, he didn’t seem to go for it. I wasn’t exactly delicate either. I guess we were wrong.” Tav lifted the bottle to her lips, the spice of the wine helping to drive away the cool breeze.

“Really? He seemed a bit smitten with you. Nevermind though, let’s find you someone else, my friend. You and Astarion have been awful flirty. I’m sure he’d at least be fun.” Karlach’s suggestion nearly caused Tav to choke on her drink.

“I don’t think he’s quite my type, love. He…reminds me too much of someone.” She took another large swig of the wine.

“Okay then, how about Gale? He’s got gorgeous eyes, and you two seem to be fast friends. You could always add a little something to that friendship.” Karlach batted her eyelashes at her, causing Tav to laugh.

“I don’t think I want to risk an explosion the size of Waterdeep for a night of fun. Besides, I don’t think Gale is the casual relationship kind of man.”

“Fucks’ sake, mate. I’m trying to help you here.” Karlach chuckled into her bottle.

“Well, that still leaves Wyll, Lae’zel, and Shadowheart. What do you think my chances are with them?” She leaned back onto her elbows, nestling her wine bottle in the sand.

“I think Lae’zel is still upset with you for stepping in on her ‘interrogation’ so she may be out. Wyll has been moping in a corner since we got back to camp, I don’t think he’s in a fun mood tonight. As for Shadowheart, how are you feeling about her Shar worship?” Karlach gave her a knowing look.

“Okay, looks like you’re stuck with me for the evening.” Tav winked at her.

“Well then, welcome to the club of the touch-starved and sexually frustrated, my friend.” She held up her wine bottle and Tav lifted her own to clink against it.

“Happy to be here, love.” Both of them took long drinks and settled in for the evening. They talked long after the others retired for the night, enjoying their bottles of wine and telling jokes and stories from their pasts. Nothing tragic, even though they both had their share of sob stories. Tonight, they focused on happy memories – tales of foes felled, lovers of their past, their favorite foods from Baldur’s Gate. She recounted her conversation with Halsin, trying to hide her disappointment. Karlach still insisted that she had a chance with him. Tav burned herself twice giving Karlach friendly nudges, her instincts causing her to forget about her fiery skin. But she didn’t mind, the injuries only made them laugh harder. Their words started to slur slightly as their bottles emptied. It was refreshing to sit and laugh with her for so long, Tav didn’t have many people in her long life that she could truly call a friend. But it was easy with Karlach. They ended up falling asleep in the sand, the heat from Karlach keeping Tav warm thought the night as she drifted off into a trance.

[talesfromthesnogbox]

I Was Wonderful

Summary: Steve thought maybe he'd be a basketball dad, he never thought he'd be a dance mom.

Rating: General

Word Count: 3,245

Notes: Hiya! This is a more fleshed out version of a thing I posted a few months back that ended up getting some traction. I haven't actually ever written for Steddie, sorry if the characterization is all over the place, I'm rusty!

Yes, this one did come to me midway through a Dance Moms rewatch. In all fairness, I grew up dancing so this fic was kind of inevitable. Hope you enjoy!

AO3 Link

~~~

Steve Harrington never saw himself as a girl dad. 

After the dust settled with Vecna, and his crop of (now teenage) nuggets was safe, Steve went through a period of self discovery, or what Robin loves to call his “big gay awakening”. See, Steve Harrington was always a ladies man, no matter how much he struck out. So when he fell for one Eddie Munson, that was a shock to all, especially Steve. 

But big gay awakening aside, Steve and Eddie were madly and completely in love, and Steve didn’t care who knew it. Nothing had ever felt more natural in his life than being with Eddie, they just made sense together. Even years after Steve’s heartfelt confession, the two were still in their honeymoon phase, so nobody was surprised when one sunny Fourth of July, they announced they were going to start the adoption process.

Neither of them knew what to expect. They went to Wayne for advice, having adopted Eddie legally after he was dropped off on his doorstep all those years ago, but this was different. Not too many agencies were too ecstatic about the idea of two “unmarried” men taking on a child together in the year 1993. The process was long and frustrating, and frankly, Eddie was ready to give up.

“It’s been two years, maybe it’s just not meant to be Stevie.” 

Steve shook his head. “So then we push on through year three. It’ll happen Eddie, I know it.” He took Eddie’s hand, lacing their fingers together and squeezing lightly.

“I just… Steve, I love you, and I wish I could give you the life you always wanted—”

“No, none of that Munson.” Steve cut him off. “Things change, I changed when I got to know you. I don’t need six little nuggets and a Winnebago to be happy. I need you and the life we have, and maybe a little bit of hope that one day we’ll find someone to take a chance on us.”

And suddenly, one day almost at the end of year three, someone finally took a chance on them. 

Steve played with his ring nervously as he sat and waited in the office at the adoption agency (they couldn’t legally get married, but that wasn’t to say they couldn’t wear rings and call each other husband to show their commitment to each other). Eddie listened intently to the social worker, explaining that their application had been approved, that the little one didn’t have anywhere else to go and they thought their home would be a good fit. Steve’s heart pounded in his ears, only catching half the conversation.

“Her name is Rosie—”

“Sorry, her?” Steve cut him off.

“Yes, eleven month old Rosemary Evelyn, born August 13th, 1995. She was born premature, and her mother had some complications during birth and passed away shortly after. Her father surrendered her, and she’s been in our care for just under a week.” The social worker could see Steve’s face contort in confusion. “Is that a problem, Steve?”

He shook his head. “No I just… I never… how could… can we meet her?” 

Steve Harrington never saw himself as a girl dad, until he met Rosemary Evelyn. 

Tears sprung to Eddie’s eyes as they were ushered into the play room, a small babbling little girl with dark curly hair, big blue eyes, and chubby rosy cheeks stared up at them. She smiled when she met their eyes, and instantly, they were gone for her.

Within a week, the Harrington house was fully baby-proofed, and Rosie Harrington was moving in. Steve felt a sense of fulfillment wash over him seeing Eddie hold her. It had only been a few days, but he already knew Eddie was the best dad on the planet. A year passed, and then two, and Steve was absolutely positive that no other dad was as good, or kind, or loving as Eddie Munson. 

But that frustrated the hell out of Steve.

One night, Steve collapsed on the couch next to Eddie, and exasperated sigh leaving his lips. “I don’t get it. She loves Metallica, she’s obsessed with Lord of the Rings, but she doesn’t even want to try basketball.”

Eddie laughed. “Stevie, she’s only just turned four, are you really sad you aren’t raising a jock?”

“No! I just want to be able to share something with her like you are.” Eddie saw right through his worry and tugged Steve down, laying his head across his lap. 

“Baby, you’re nothing like your dad. You’re trying, you’re spending time with her, and she can see that, I promise you. Rosie loves you, and you’ll find something.” Eddie stroked Steve’s hair, seeing the worry dissipate. “Hey, Wayne is itching to see her before she starts preschool, why don’t we send her off to grandpa’s for the day, maybe he can get her to play ball or something.” 

Steve smiled. “Yeah, yeah I think she’d like that.”

When Eddie and Steve picked up Rosie from Wayne’s the next day, she wasn’t playing ball with him on the front lawn. Instead, their little girl ran to them in a droopy pink tutu and leotard with little ballet slippers. “Daddy! Daddy! Look what Grandpa Wayne gave me.” She was all smiles as she spun in place, nearly toppling over from lack of balance and excitement when Steve caught her.

“Wow princess, look at you!”

Wayne picked up a rogue sequin and grumbled. “Claudia was over earlier, they were showing something about Swan Lake on cable and the kiddo’s eyes lit up. We went for a walk downtown and looks like there’s a dance school that just opened up.”

Steve’s brows shot up. “Really? What do you think Rosie, should we go down there and see if they have any classes for you?”

That’s how Steve found himself a Saturday morning regular at Sparkle Steps Dance Centre. They had a routine down: the boys would wake her up, Steve would slick back Rosie’s hair into a delicate little ballet bun while she ate breakfast, they’d help her into her tights and leotard, tie her skirt, and pack her little shoes in her backpack and walk on over to the studio. Rosie would say hi to Ashley the receptionist, and hug Steve before her hour long 9am ballet class with Miss Abby in studio A. 

“Good morning Melissa, Kelly, Jill.” Steve sat in his regular spot in the viewing room with the other moms.

“Morning Steve!”

Steve Harrington had become an enigma to the moms at the studio. They loved to gossip about where Rosie’s mother was, who she was, and why she was never seen with Steve at the studio. But Rosie always came in early, perfectly dressed, and well mannered despite her sass at home. Steve pretended he didn’t hear what the moms at the studio were saying about him; he was 33 with the same great hair he’d had in high school, and charm to go along with it. He wore a wedding ring, but never spoke of a significant other, it was always just Steve and Rosie. 

Of course Eddie had wanted to join them, but wanted to give Steve space, have something that was his with their daughter, and he was perfectly happy to have a day to sleep in.

One of those quiet Saturday mornings, Rosie had insisted they stay after her ballet class to watch her new friend Rachel. “Daddy her feet make noise! Can I do that?”

Steve tilted his head as he watched the girls in the class stomp their feet and tap their toes. He knew Eddie would approve of the rhythmic sounds the tap shoes made, but worried it would be too much all at once. He looked to Melissa, “Rachel likes it?”

Melissa smiled and nodded enthusiastically. “She loves it, it keeps her busy and tires her out so she actually naps in the afternoon.” 

Steve nodded in approval. “Let me think about it, okay Princess?”

As soon as they’d arrived home, Steve grabbed Eddie and dialled Dustin. “We need to talk, Rosie wants to start tap.”

“Tap, like the noisy shoes tap?” Eddie’s eyes lit up. “That’s metal as fuck, Gareth will probably want to teach her how to drum next once she’s got the rhythm.”

“Steve, you can’t take her out of ballet, it’s the foundation of all dance, she needs that foundation.” Dustin rebutted through the phone. The kid was way too invested in his niece’s interests, and that’s probably why he was her favourite uncle. 

“No, no, she’d do both. Ballet and tap. But you don’t think that’ll overwhelm her will it? She’s only four.”

Eddie shook his head, and Dustin laughed. “Steve, she’s like the smartest kid I know aside from my own. She’ll do fine.”

“Dustin, your kid is like five months old.” Eddie chided him. “Stevie, Rosie is gonna be fine, let her do tap!” 

Just like that, Steve’s one hour at the dance studio Saturday mornings became two. “She’s so excited for the next class.” He chatted happily with Melissa. “But I’m confused, the taps didn’t come screwed on.”

Melissa giggled. “No sweetie, you’ve gotta screw them on yourself. Do you have a toolkit in your car?” 

Steve sighed. “Shit, no we walked here. Hold on, let me call someone.” He ran down to reception, Ashley granting him the phone, and prayed Eddie was out of bed. “Hey babe, I need a screwdriver…”

Twenty minutes later Eddie came barrelling up the stairs to the viewing room, Ashley hot on his tail. “Sir, that room is for parents only—”

“It’s okay Ashley! He’s with me.” Steve assured her, handing Eddie the shoe and the tap. “Thanks for coming so quickly.”

“No sweat, couldn’t let our little girl miss out on her first day of tap.” He kissed Steve’s cheek, not realizing three pairs of eyes on him.

Steve’s cheeks blazed red as Melissa, Kelly, and Jill eyed the matching ring on Eddie’s left hand, putting the pieces together. He cleared his throat and gestured to Eddie. “Um, ladies this is Eddie, my husband.”

“Oh, husband!” Jill sidled up beside them. “Very nice to meet you Eddie, Steve has told us nothing about you.”

Eddie chuckled. “No glowing review big boy?”

Steve hung his head. “Not everyone in Hawkins is so open minded…”

Eddie and Steve spent the rest of the hour telling the moms about how they got together, their small wedding ceremony in the Byers’ backyard, and how they’d adopted Rosie. By the time the ballet class had ended, the moms had adopted Eddie as one of their own just as they had Steve. Before long, Eddie was joining Steve and Rosie on Saturday mornings at the studio.

Autumn flew quickly, Christmas came and went, and once the new year hit, recital talk began. Rosie really took to her lessons, she raised her hand when she didn’t understand something, and Steve took to practicing her routines with her at home, even if he didn’t fully understand what he was doing.

“Remember what miss Abby told you, shoulders down, chin up, soft hands, stretch your feet, okay?”

Rosie nodded, kissing Steve’s cheek and disappearing through the doorway of studio A. 

“Moms? Can you join me in the studio please?” Miss Abby beckoned to the adults. They all followed dutifully, taking off their shoes and lining up at the barre. “As you all know, recital season is quickly approaching. We’ll be putting in orders for the tutus and their tap costumes, but they’ll need to be modified. Proper buns for the recital and light stage makeup, clean pink tights for ballet, and nude tights for tap. Got it?”

The moms and Steve nodded as they were dismissed, making a mental note of what he needed. “Melissa, when she says modified…?”

“Oh you know, glitter, rhinestones, the usual.”

“Right, the usual, cool.”

Steve’s head was in the clouds until he returned home; Eddie, always the observant one, could see the panic on his face.

“Babe I think we’re in over our heads with this dance thing. I need to modify costumes now?”

Eddie frowned. “Modify how?” Steve relayed what Melissa had said, panic stricken. “Steven, that’s nothing. Did you forget I used to make whole costumes for the party for DnD? I got this.” 

The day the costumes arrived, Eddie finally felt totally in his element with the moms. He’d brought along his whole costume kit, much to the surprise of the moms, showing them how well his fabric glue held, and teaching them the best stitches to ensure no elastics snapped off their daughters’ ballet slippers. For once, he was the star parent, and a huge wave of pride rolled off Steve as miss Abby complimented Eddie’s tailoring work on Rosie’s costumes.

Eddie tagging along to the studio meant Steve had backup learning Rosie’s routines. His memory was sharper than Steve’s was, and he was surprisingly more competitive. They worked together to support their little dancer, Steve would wake up early with her and stretch before their day began, Eddie would help her run through her routines before bed each night. One day after work at the body shop, Eddie brought home a large slab of wood, sanded and stained and perfect for practicing with tap shoes on, and a pair of the noisy shoes for himself, knowing he could help his girl better if he could do the steps with her. Steve stood behind them watching Eddie coach Rosie through the steps, counting them out for her as she danced. 

“ONE and TWO and THREE-EE and a FOUR. Don’t forget that brush in there, stay on your toes don’t drop your heels, yes that’s it!” 

Steve chuckled and decided it was time to intervene, hitting pause on the tape. “Alright twinkletoes, bath and then bed.”

Eddie picked her up, depositing her on the couch and helping her take off her shoes. “Daddy did you see, I did the whole dance without forgetting the next step!”

“I saw princess, you’re doing wonderful! And what do you say to dad for helping you run through your routines?”

Rosie kissed Eddie on the cheek and threw her little arms around his neck. “Thank you Dad, I love you.”

“I love you too kiddo, I’m so proud of you.” He peppered her face with kisses, tossing her noisy shoes onto the tap board. “Now go take a bath, you stink.”

She giggled, running to her room to grab her bathrobe. 

“You’re incredible.” Steve hugged Eddie from behind.

“I dunno man, her technique is better than mine will ever be—”

Steve squeezed him harder and whispered lowly in Eddie’s ear. “Shut up, you know I’m not talking about the dancing. You. Are. An amazing. Father. And I love you, so fucking much.” 

Eddie turned in his arms and caught Steve in a searing kiss. “She’s an amazing kid, she’s our amazing kid. And I love you too.” He pulled his husband in as close as he could, reconnecting their lips in another toe curling kiss.

“Ew! That’s so gross!”

Eddie chuckled, pulling away. “Guess this will have to wait until after bath time.” 

“Holding you to that Munson. Now come on, time to bathe the gremlin.”

The early June recital weekend came faster than anyone was prepared for, and the boys were panicking. 

“Stevie, are you sure we’re supposed to put makeup on her? She’s just a kid.”

“Eddie relax. Abby said light stage makeup. It’s probably just so the lights don’t wash her out. Gotta see that beautiful face from the back of the theatre.” Steve kissed Rosie’s cheek and swiped on some more blush. “But just for dance, you got that? No makeup until you’re older. Your beautiful skin doesn’t need all that gunk on it.”

Rosie nodded dutifully and closed her eyes as Steve applied a thick layer of eyeliner. 

“There, what do you think?”

Eddie turned his head sideways and frowned. “Baby I think you went a little too heavy on the cheeks.”

“God you’re right, we’re hopeless.”

“It’s okay Daddy, Auntie Nancy can fix it when she brings me to the stage door.” 

He patted the top of her head, careful not to disrupt her perfectly slicked back hair. “Auntie Nancy will make you look perfect. Come on, let’s wipe this off before she gets here.”

Nancy and Robin took Rosie to the stage door while Eddie, Steve, Wayne, and Claudia found their seats. As soon as 7:00 hit, the house lights went down, and the show was starting. Rosie’s ballet routine was right after the opening number, and Steve hadn’t been so nervous in a long time. As the music faded out and the lights changed, he took Eddie’s hand and squeezed, feeling his husband squeeze back.

After what felt like hours, Rosie’s ballet music started. A chorus of “Awww” spread out amongst the audience as the four little girls scurried out in their rhinestoned tutus, big smiles on their faces. Steve barely saw the routine he knew so well; his eyes glistened with tears seeing Rosie on stage, confidently dancing just like they’d practiced. Chin up, shoulders down, soft hands, feet stretched. Eddie on the other hand had his lips pursed, watching her intently as she made it through a particularly difficult stretch of the routine. “Yes!” He whispered when she landed her pirouette, perfectly spotting the back wall just as Steve had reminded her to. The number was over too soon, and Steve was whispering “I love you” towards the stage as applause broke out and their daughter exited stage right. 

Steve wiped his tears, subtly kissing the back of Eddie’s hand. They could relax until intermission, Rosie’s tap number wasn’t until the second half of the show.

The tap number turned out to be a hit. Steve didn’t expect to still be emotional watching his girl on stage, but the tears came nonetheless. Eddie was more tense for this one, listening to all her sounds, counting out the music as they danced. “That’s my girl!” He shouted as Melissa and Jill whooped on the other side of him as Rosie landed her pickups. Wayne quietly handed Steve a tissue, sporting one of his own in his shirt sleeve as the girls finished their routine and flapped off the stage. 

Just like that, the show was over, and it was time to collect their little dancer.

“Daddies! Grandpa Wayne!” Rosie came running towards them, hugging Wayne around the leg. 

“Did you see Auntie Claudia, Nancy, and Robin came too?”

She nodded enthusiastically, passing hugs around to all of them. Her eyes lit up as Wayne handed her a bouquet of roses, and Robin a little teddy bear in a tutu, congratulating her on a great show. She’d had a big day, and Steve could tell she was exhausted.

“Here princess, let me take those for you.” He took the bouquet as Eddie picked her up, her little head falling to his shoulder. Glitter rained down Eddie’s right side, sticking itself to the ends of his hair and his worn leather jacket. Steve chuckled sympathetically, brushing what he could from his back as they took her out to the car.

“Hey Daddy guess what?”

“What’s up, princess?” Steve opened the lobby door, letting Eddie and their sleepy dancer through first.

“I was wonderful.”

The boys chuckled, Eddie kissing the top of her head. “You were baby, you were.”

[h-c-u]

Eye of the storm pt 2

Summary: You're still grieving after your father's death, and Beau is still helping you cope... But you start feeling something else besides your grief.

Pairing: Beau "Cyclone" Simpson x fem!reader (Iceman's daughter)

W/C: 9k

Rating: PG, age gap, canon character's death (Tom Kazansky)

TWs: Grief, unnamed ED, Panic attacks.

A/N: Sooo... Part two is here... I've already started writing a part 3, but it might take some time before it will be ready, because writing about grief is taking a bit more from me than I've expected...

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 Masterlist | List of tags | Eye of the storm playlist

This time when you woke up, you immediately knew where you were... And even though your whole body was stiff and aching, you honestly couldn't pinpoint the last time you felt this comfortable. You were pressed extremely tightly against vice-admiral Beau Simpson, whose arms became your cage... You didn't want to move too much because you didn't want to wake him up... again. But you still wanted to find a more comfortable position to ease the pain, and despite being trapped, you didn't find it hard... You moved your right hand from his chest to his ribs and snaked one of your legs in between his. You also changed your angle a bit, so you were leaning even more against him, which relieved the pressure on your spine, and he hummed quietly in his sleep, subconsciously pulling you closer, so your forehead was now pressed against his chest.

You wanted to take a peek at his face, but your position made that impossible, so you closed your eyes again and focused on his breathing instead, and it wasn't long before you fell asleep again. 

He didn't condone spending a whole day in bed. Usually, he was up at the brink of dawn, but with you next to him... He could stay in bed forever. Didn't matter that it was close to noon now, which he was able to tell from the sounds that were coming from outside. He knew the exercise plan for today, because he had to approve it yesterday, and based solely on engine sounds he was able to deduce which group was landing and which was going up for training. 

He honestly didn't remember when was the last time he took a day off, especially without any secondary purpose, like a wedding in a family, or something similar. But to do... nothing...? His inner workaholic wanted to scream, but every other part told him to shut up because you were sleeping so soundly in his arms and everything else was simply... not important.

He finally relaxed his stiff arms, giving you a bit more room to breathe or turn, but you stayed in the same position and didn't want to let go of him, which made him smile. He leaned a tiny bit back, so you could look at your face while you slept... Something he did so many times during the last two months, but this time he wasn't lurking and trying to catch a glimpse through a barely opened door... This time your hand was wrapped around his abdomen, and you were warming his chest with your breath. And he could look at you like that for ages, studying every freckle, every wrinkle, and committing them to memory. As gently as possible he moved your hair from your face and put them behind your ear, so he could take a better look at you. There were bags under your eyes, your cheeks weren't as full as they used to be, and you were much paler than when he saw you yesterday, and it was breaking his heart... He wanted you to be happy, and healthy, and he wanted to make sure you never had to be in the pain you were currently in... Deep down he knew it wasn’t exactly possible, but he would do anything in his power to help you as much as he could. 

It was dangerously easy for him to get lost in you... And you spoke...maybe 10...? 15...? words to him during the last 48h... He knew that there was still a long and hard road ahead of you, and he wanted to be there for you every step of the way. 

Eventually, you opened your eyes, and it was the only indicator that you were no longer sleeping. Your breathing and your heartbeat stayed the same, and you were too afraid to move, not wanting anything to change. 

Only after a few good minutes, you realized something... He was still here... Not that you were imagining it, but wasn't he supposed to work? And yet the sun was high up in the sky, which you were able to tell because the blinds weren't closed all the way and the sun was reaching the bed. It wasn't hurting your eyes though, because there was a stoic body protecting you from direct sunlight. 

You finally collected enough courage to look up and take a closer look at his face, only to realize he was staring at you too, with a soft smile on his face. He must have realized that you woke up as soon as you did and wanted to see what would you do next. 

- Hi... - he said quietly, and you opened your mouth to reply, but no word left your throat. There was a short raspy sound that shocked you, but considering how your night went... it wasn't all that surprising. - It's ok, you don't have to say anything. Are you ok with me leaving for a few minutes? I'd like to get us some food and something to drink. - he explained and you nodded slowly, quietly wondering how you ended up here. Well, you knew all the steps that were taken, but still... Everything seemed so... surreal. 

When he turned away from you to get out of the bed, you let your hand glide over his chest, and there was a quiet voice in your head telling you not to let him go, but you did... Because the louder one assured you that he'll be back... 

- Is it ok if I change here...? - he asked quietly, not wanting to make you uncomfortable, and you nodded again. After all, it was still his personal space. And even though you were glued to him for the last twelve hours, somehow watching him change was... too much, so you pulled a duvet over your head and cut all possible visuals. You were a bit afraid that if you only looked away, or closed your eyes, the temptation would win. After about a minute you heard the door opening and closing and you finally peeked from under the cover; it was so hot under it, and yet you still felt cold and your fingers were still stiff, but you weren't sure if it was because of poor circulation, or because of how strong you were grabbing his shirt during the night. 

You took a few deep breaths and tried to stretch your stiff muscles on the bed, but that wasn't working the best... And you didn't feel strong enough to get up just yet, but you at least tried to sit up and move your neck and arms a bit more, just to avoid more pain later. 

You don't deserve to be here; you're just using him... Your own cold voice in your head sent shivers down your spine and you instantly went pale and closed your eyes. You knew that it was most likely right. You hated those moments when it found a way to float to the surface. It was a long time since you last heard it, but that also meant... You were actually feeling things, instead of constant numbness. Not exactly good things, but it was a step outside of the state you were in for the last 2 months... So... It was... good? That you felt pathetic? Even thinking that felt miserable, so you just shook your head, dispersing all the unwanted thoughts, at least for now, because you knew that you'd have to deal with them sooner or later. 

He left you alone for longer than you anticipated, but on the other hand, he didn't have to come back at all... You honestly didn't know much about his private life, but you at least knew that he wasn't living on base, because he mentioned remodeling the bathroom in his house a few months ago, while you were still interpreting for your dad. So, he basically uprooted his routine, just to accommodate you in it. He wasn't sleeping in his own house in his own bed, just because he took pity on you. No, that wasn't right. He wouldn't take a day off if he only felt pity. He wouldn't give you his own clothes and wouldn't bring you your favorite juice... And your favorite tea... And wouldn't know about your allergy... He knew things about you, but before you had a chance to analyze this whole situation more, the door opened, and Beau came in with a whole tray of food that looked... delicious.

You recognized some of the components from the canteen, but only a few of them were straight up available on the menu, which told you that he either requested for a special meal to be prepared or actually cooked it himself. He handed you a thermal mug and placed the tray on the bed, in front of you. He also opened the blinds a bit, but not all the way, took a cushion from the armchair, placed it on the floor, and sat on it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

He didn't have to encourage you to eat this time, because after what happened at night, you were starving and exhausted. Everything on the tray could be eaten without cutlery, which was another thing he must have noticed about you. You started with a small egg tart with veggies and cheese that looked like it was made in a muffin tray, but right before you took a first bite, you realized that he smelled vaguely of coffee, and yet there was none to be seen. Did he just drink in the canteen because he was waiting for food, or because he knew you didn't drink coffee at all? 

He gave you a soft smile and you finally bit into the tart. It was indeed delicious... And only after you started to eat, he did the same. The silence between you two should have been at least uncomfortable, and yet you felt like it was pleasantly wrapped around your shoulders and filled the room with otherworldly... softness. You just couldn't put it into words, but you felt safe. 

After you finished the tart, you opted out for a croissant and a bowl of fresh berries. You realized that he also knew how you ate your croissants because he didn't even bat an eye when you slowly started unwrapping the pastry from the middle and ripping away small pieces to eat. Most people who saw that for the first time were at least surprised and made a comment, but he... looked like it was the most normal way of eating croissants. Only after taking a few berries out of the bowl, you noticed that there were no blackberries, another small thing. 

It should start to creep you out that he knew so many things about you... One or two might have been a coincidence, but this many...? You really should be more concerned. Yet somehow... you weren't. You were hyper-independent for so long that you almost forgot what it was like for someone to take care of you. Of course, your family knew all the things that you liked and didn't like, but because you were so focused on helping your dad during those last years, you drifted away from the rest of them... And your father... well... He didn't have the energy to do those kinds of things anymore. 

And you honestly couldn't remember if anyone ever brought you breakfast to bed...

You couldn't help but look at him, studying his every move, gesture, even the tiniest expression, and he let you do that without making any comments, although it must have made him feel at least a little bit uncomfortable like he was a frog being dissected in the biology class.

What you didn't know, was that he actually enjoyed all the attention you were giving him, for two reasons. One - it meant that you weren't spiraling deeper into your grief, and two - he spent so much time watching you from afar, that he felt it was only fair you could observe him up close any time you wanted. And he wanted to have you close as often as possible. 

After you finished butchering your croissant and there were no berries left, you finally got to the mug he gave you as soon as he entered. You were expecting tea again... But to your surprise, there was hot chocolate inside, and you noticed him smiling as soon as you realized what was inside. He was suspiciously smug when he saw that you enjoyed what he was doing for you. From that first smoothie, through fluffy socks, and ending on that hot chocolate. And it was made with full milk, you could tell just by the smell... You smiled for the first time today, and Beau's heart melted while he watched you take small sips from his mug. 

Eventually, the tray got emptied, mostly by him, and he moved it to the small desk. After that, he took the cushion from the floor and placed it back on the armchair, where he eventually sat. You watched him closely while he took his phone from the desk and checked his messages, or rather a message, because there was only one, from Solomon. And it contained only two letters - OK. 

- Why are you doing all this...? - a quiet question left your mouth before you realized that it had formed. He looked at you, put his phone back on the desk, and leaned a bit forward. He contemplated the answer, trying to find the right words, but neither of you was in a hurry, so you waited patiently until he was ready. 

- Honestly, I have no idea... - he finally gave up on trying to smash all that was happening in his head into one neat answer because it was impossible. - The simple answer would be because you need it... And for some twisted reason, I care about you. I know I shouldn't, trust me... We basically don't know each other and yet every time I see you... - he couldn't even finish the sentence without feeling utterly disgusted with himself. - Say one word and I'll stop, I promise... I'll leave you be. - you didn't have trouble believing him and could hear the desperation in his words as if somehow you telling him to stop could save him from damnation. 

- But you do know things about me, don't you...? - your voice was quiet, barely a whisper... And he hid his face in his hands for a moment, because saying it all out loud meant that he would have to admit it to himself. All that small gestures couldn't have been more obvious, but actually saying it...

- I do... - he hung his head in shame, and when you didn't say anything, he was too scared to look at you again; he was afraid to see disgust, or even worse - fear, on your face, which in his head was a real possibility. And the longer you stayed quiet, the more he was afraid to look. 

- I... I don't mind that. - it took you a good few minutes to finally say it. Not because you were torn; his mere presence calmed all the galloping thoughts in your head and you wanted to keep that in your life at all costs. You were still exhausted and even though you just ate, you still didn't have a lot of energy. And just speaking was... hard. You weren't doing it that often during the last two months. But when you finally spoke, his eyes immediately shot back to your face, looking for any sign that you didn't mean it... That you weren't ok with him indulging himself. - It helps... - you added with a weak smile and took a deep breath. - You calm the storms in my head instead of being one... - you continued and something else started to creep into his eyes. Hope...? - I can't promise you anything in return... But if you are willing to, I would like you to... keep doing all that. - you finally finished. It took a lot from you to admit that you needed help and that you wanted to get that help from him. You knew that he knew it wouldn't be easy at times, he had a taste of it that night, and you couldn't help feeling guilty for asking for that. 

- I would like that very much... - he whispered, afraid that if he spoke louder, everything you just said would crumble and disappear. - Can I...? - he wasn't sure what exactly he was asking for because there was so much left unsaid. 

- You can go all out... And if I'll ever start feeling uncomfortable, I'll let you know... Are you ok with that? - he nodded, and just like that - a weird, crooked relationship formed. 

- It's good to hear your voice again... - he said a bit louder, with a small smile creeping onto his lips. He missed it... And even though it was still hoarse and strained, he was happy to hear it. He suspected that you had to force every word out, and he wasn't happy about that specific aspect, of course, but he still enjoyed listening to you. 

By this time, he learned enough about cues in your body language, that he knew you were still exhausted and you were closing in on your limits, so he stood up, took the empty mug from your hands, put it on the desk, and finally climbed into the bed next to you, and pulled you down, so you were laying again. This time you found your way into his arms without any doubts or worries, because even though there was still a lot to discuss, you were both happy with the current arrangement. 

You fell asleep almost immediately, while he kept gently stroking your back; he didn't need as much sleep as you did, but he was more than happy to just have you in his arms. And while you were resting, he was planning his workday for tomorrow, because as much as he didn't want to leave you alone, he also knew that it wouldn't be healthy for you to become completely dependent on his presence. And he still planned on visiting you as often as he could... He also suspected that it would be best if you stayed here for a few more days, because that way he could keep a close eye on you. And since you were already basically living on base, only going home to get a new journal, and a change of clothes, he honestly didn't think you would mind. Plus, you wouldn't have to risk catching a cold from sitting on the floor all the time.

He wasn't sure exactly how much time had passed, but the sun was slowly receding from the room, and it would be good for both of you to eat something, so he gently untangled himself from the mess of your limbs and went out to get some dinner as well as few other things from the shop on base. 

When he came back, you were still sound asleep, and he didn't want to wake you just yet. As quietly as possible he started unpacking his small shopping spree. He knew that your hair needed more than a simple shampoo, so he bought a matching conditioner and a wooden, wide tooth comb, which he placed in the bathroom. He also exchanged your toothbrush for the green one, since it was your favorite color. 

He didn't know much about skincare, but the lady in the shop was more than helpful and helped him select the basics because if he would have been left alone, he would just buy one of everything in hope that he'd ended up something you'd like. He also bought you a few more sets of underwear, fluffy socks, and a pair of slippers just in case. After carefully considering his options, he also decided to get you a sketchbook and a set of good-quality pencils, because he wasn't sure if you had yours with you. Before the funeral, he saw you sketching in between the meetings multiple times; he wasn't completely sure if you were ready to pick that up again, but he wanted you to have that option. When he was standing in the line, he also grabbed a pack of almonds and another one with pineapple bites covered in chocolate, because he saw you snacking on those in the past, and any food he could get into you was good. Fortunately, you only needed a gentle nudge, and not a full-blown intervention, because he would be at a loss how to help you with that. 

It wasn't much, but it still took him a few good moments to unpack everything, and after he finished, he finally approached you, kneeled next to the bed, and gently put his hand on your shoulder to wake you up. 

It was enough to get through the thick layer of Morpheus's sand, but it still took you a while to actually open your eyes, and when you eventually did, he couldn't help but smile. 

- You need to eat... - he whispered, and you nodded. He moved a few rogue strands of hair from your face and you leaned into his touch, even if it was only fingertips brushing against your cheeks and forehead, which he immediately noticed, so he let his fingers linger for just a bit longer before you stretched your sore muscles and eventually sat up. That's when he passed you a giant mug with spicy pumpkin soup and a small bowl of cheesy bread. He knew that it was one of few things from the canteen that you enjoyed as it was and that you preferred to drink it or dip your bread in it than to eat it with a spoon. And while you started sipping on the soup, he ate his salad, which was definitely not on the menu, because you were able to recognize walnuts and... cranberries? No way that soldiers on base were fed that stuff. 

You bent your knees and rested the mug with soup on top of them, so you wouldn't have to raise it up every time you were taking a sip; it was easier to lean a bit a tilt the mug. It wasn't the most gracious position, but it was comfortable. He finished eating first, but instead of doing anything in particular, he just leaned back on the armchair, straightened his legs, and was just looking at you, even though his eyes were almost completely closed. You should feel weird... And yet the corners of your lips went up every time when your eye wandered back to him, and you saw that he was still observing... 

As soon as you finished eating, he took the dirty dishes from your hands and placed them on the desk, and only now you noticed a few of your favorite snacks in the back of it, and it caught you by surprise, even though you already established that he knew a lot about you; you just didn't know what "a lot" exactly meant. Which should really creep you out more, but you didn't have the energy to worry about that just yet. 

- Do you want to get some fresh air? - he asked, and you shook your head. Not yet... It's not like you've spent the last two months only indoors, but now... now you were in a safe space which you didn't have to leave to go home, or in fear of getting caught somewhere you shouldn't be. You were finally relaxed enough not to spiral every time you thought about your dad. 

- But... - you started, and he perked up a bit. - Would it be ok if I took a shower...? - he immediately nodded. You knew you didn't have to ask, but technically it was a choice... And giving that choice away meant that you didn't have to spend energy on actually making it. 

- I got you some fresh underwear and some other things in the bathroom... Clothes are in the wardrobe and, feel free to take anything you want, I honestly don't mind... - he gave you a gentle smile, and you couldn't help but wonder what was waiting for you in the bathroom. It still took you a good minute to actually get out of bed and get the mentioned clothes. You chose another plain t-shirt, this time grey, and you couldn't help but notice all the ironed and pressed dress uniforms that were hanging next to a much simpler, beige selection. You run your fingers over familiar material, and tears started gathering in your eyes because they looked almost identical to the ones that were in your dad's closet at home. 

Even though you weren't facing him, Beau almost immediately realized that something was wrong. Maybe it was the tenseness in your shoulders, or somehow, he was able to tell from your breathing, but he quickly found his way to you, took your hand away from the soft material, and closed the door on that part of the wardrobe. Your lower lip started to tremble, and you did your best not to panic. You were keeping your eyes on the hand that was touching the black uniform a second ago, now gently resting on another hand, much bigger than your own. You focused on grounding yourself in this moment and ran your thumb over the skin under it... It was rough and soft at the same time, and much, much warmer. You couldn't fathom how the hell his body temperature was so high... Or maybe yours was so low? You couldn't really tell... 

- I'll move them... - he said quietly, laser-focused on your reaction because he didn't want to miss the signs that you were starting to spiral. 

- Don't... - you didn't plan on saying that, and you took a moment to put in words what you meant, even if that one word would be enough for him to do whatever you requested. - I need to get used to... everything... - you added eventually, still keeping your eyes on both of your hands and only when you heard the knock on the door, you were able to turn around and shift your gaze to his face. He didn't say anything and kept his expression blank, but you grabbed whatever you needed from the shelf and quickly found your way to the bathroom, closing the door behind you, but you didn't dream about starting the shower just yet. You knew far too well how quickly rumors started and grew on this base, and you didn't want to do anything to put Beau in an uncomfortable position. Well... Not like that...

So instead of running the water, you put your ear to the door and tried to overhear who knocked and what they were talking about. Because everything was muffled, you couldn't hear the exact words, but you recognized the voice... You shouldn't be surprised to hear Maverick, after all, he was an instructor here, but it was still a bit weird... Eventually, you heard the doors closing, and you finally exhaled, only now realizing that you were holding your breath.

You undressed, folded your worn clothes, and put them away. You took a quick look around the room, to see what was added, and the first thing you noticed, was a dark green toothbrush in the cup, next to his gray one, and it made you smile, even though the small voice in your head whispered that throwing away a toothbrush after using it only once was bad for the environment. In the place where you left your toothbrush yesterday, there were cotton pads, a wooden comb, micellar water, and a light serum with caffeine and pineapple. It wasn't anything you used before, but after reading the ingredients and trying the serum on your hand, you were satisfied. 

And one more thing waited for you under the shower, a matching, pine conditioner... And you honestly didn't remember when was the last time you spent more than 3 minutes on your hair. But it was time... You took the comb under the shower with you, so you could untangle them while the conditioner was still in your hair, which would be much easier after a such long time. 

You ended up doing two rounds of deep conditioning, and since neither of you had to pay for a water bill, you sat on the floor under the scorching hot water for the whole duration of your shower. 

Somewhere in the middle, Beau knocked and asked if you were ok, with a clear worry in his voice. You assured him that you were more than fine, and that seemed to calm him down. In the military, any shower over 5 minutes most likely seemed excessive, but you honestly didn't care. You slowly and methodically untangled all the knots. There were quite a few of them, but they weren't big, so it didn't take you long to get rid of them. And after about 30 minutes under the shower, you finally got out. Everything was covered in condensation, and you couldn't see yourself in the mirror, but about that, you were actually happy. You used the other things he bought for you and finally got dressed in his t-shirt and shorts. Even though they were too big for you, they fit perfectly... Finally, you brushed your teeth, hang your towel on a drying rack, took the comb, and left the bathroom. 

He was still sitting in the armchair, doing something on his phone, but as soon as you emerged, he put it down and looked at you. 

- Mitchell asked if I saw you today... - he said, while you were putting your dirty clothes in the laundry basket that stood right next to the bathroom door. You froze as soon as the words left his mouth. - He said your mother couldn't reach you since yesterday and asked him if he saw you on base... He asked around and someone told him that they saw us together on the balcony couple of days ago. - he explained everything in more detail, and you started to relax a bit. - I told him that I haven't seen you, but that if I will, I'll pass the message. - he added and you sighed. You hated lying to your mother, but you didn't want to keep her worried, so you took your long dead phone and a charger from your bag and plugged it in next to the armchair he was sitting in. Next, you sat in between his legs, gently took his hand, and put the comb in it. 

For a short moment, he looked at the comb dumbfounded but eventually started gently brushing your hair, starting at the bottom. Your hair was in a much better state than just a day ago, and even though you took care of the bigger knots in the shower, there were still a few new ones created when you were drying your hair with a towel. You pulled your knees close to your chest and put your chin on them, to give him more space to maneuver… 

And for a few moments, life was simple again... 

He was gently loosening your hair first with fingers and then following the same path with a comb, never pulling strong enough to even move your head. 

- Would you mind if I braided your hair? - he asked, and it took you by surprise. You didn't expect him to know how to do that, but you still wordlessly agreed. He parted your hair in the middle, combed them once again, and slowly but surely started putting them in two tight Dutch braids, making sure to put them in such a way, that you'd be comfortable laying down. He didn't have anything to tie them with, so you reached into your bag, pulled two hairbands that used to live on your wrist, and passed them to him. You leaned back when he was done. 

The heat from the shower managed to escape your body while he was playing with your hair and you were starting to get cold again, but you had to do one more thing before climbing back under the covers. 

You reached for your phone and turned it back on. You didn't even wait for all the notifications to show up, because you didn't have the energy to deal with them right now. With a heavy heart, you dialed your mum's number and she answered almost immediately. 

- Are you ok...? - you could tell that she was crying, and you tensed up in response. You didn't mean to worry her... - I mean, physically... - she added immediately, and you were thankful that your first words to her didn't have to be a lie. 

- I'm not hurt. And I'm slowly starting to eat again... - your voice was much quieter than hers. You could feel Beau's hands softly snaking over your shoulders, and you instantly relaxed a bit. 

- That's good to hear... Really good... - you could tell that she was relieved. - Are you still on base? - you knew why she was asking... She wanted to have your latest location in case you truly went missing. 

- I am... I'm in the building and have a safe space to stay... - you couldn't say much more than that without sharing things you weren't ready to share with her. For example, vice Admiral Beau Simpson was currently gently taking care of the knots in the muscles of your neck. And that you were wearing his clothes... It was too complicated to explain, especially considering that you didn't exactly understand the situation you were in.

- That's good to hear... - she repeated herself and there was an awkward silence for a moment. - I want to slowly start packing up his office... - she whispered, and you froze. Your heart skipped a few beats, but almost instantly started compensating with a speed that it was beating at now. 

- Mom, please... - you weren't sure if you actually said those words out loud. 

- I didn't do anything yet... But it's painful... I live here and see it every day... It hurts... - you understood it far too well... That's why you weren't spending almost any time at home. And yet you still couldn’t say anything. - Honey...? Are you still there...? - she asked after good five minutes of silence.

- I'll help you. - you somehow managed to gather all the energy and put it in those words. - Give me a week. And I'll help you. - your voice was strong and sure, but your face suggested that you could break any second. You turned around to look at Beau and when you saw his giant smile and how proud he was, you stayed strong for just a moment longer. 

- Oh, you don't have to, I know how you... - you knew she was telling the truth. 

- I want to. It's something we should all do together as a family... You know, remember all the good things, have a good cry... - you were surprising yourself. When it came to your own emotions, you were at a complete loss... But it instantly got overwritten by the fact that your mom needed help. 

- One week...? - she asked, her voice unsure. 

- One week. - you repeated, your voice somehow still confident. 

- Ok then... I'll call Nicky and tell him. - you haven't seen your brother since the funeral... Sure, he was sending you tons of messages, and voice notes, but you were afraid to open most of them. 

- Ok... See you then... - your voice became more unsure in the end, and you started to hang up, but before the connection dropped, you heard one last thing. 

- I love you so m... - and then there was quiet again. And you almost immediately started hyperventilating, your phone buzzing with all the notifications from the last few days. Beau had to pry your fingers from it and pulled you onto his knees as if you weighed nothing. 

- Shhhh, shhh, shhh... - he tried to calm you down, while you clenched your fingers around his shirt and did your best not to pass out. He put his hand on your sternum and caught your gaze. He started taking slow, deep breaths. At first, you weren't able to match them in the slightest, but eventually, you forced yourself to do so, even though it burned your lungs. - Good... - his quiet voice was like a cooling pad for your brain. It took you a good minute of slowly breathing together to calm down again, and as soon as that happened, he took his hand from your chest. 

It was the first time in weeks since your panic attack didn't spiral to an unmanageable degree...

You were still shaking a bit from the cold, but the warmth of his body helped... You rested your head under his chin and finally relaxed your fingers. 

- You're shivering... - he said quietly. He could still remember the icy cold fingers that woke him up in the middle of the night, but until now he assumed it was a one-time occurrence. He quickly noted to get you a hot water bottle, but now, he effortlessly moved you to bed before you managed to protest, and covered you with a duvet. - I will be back in 10... - he said, when you were tucked in, and as soon as he left with the dirty dishes terrifying thought crossed your mind...

Were you trying to replace your father with Beau...?

You instantly froze, and even though you were under thick covers, you suddenly felt as if you were encased in an iceberg and the time suddenly slowed down to a dangerous degree. This wasn't something that he would be able to calm you down from, and his presence would only confuse you more, so you had less than ten minutes to overanalyze it, break it into smaller pieces, beat the emotions out of it, and accept whatever conclusion you'd come up with. 

The biggest "no" was the fact that you were sleeping in the same bed. That's something you would have never done with your dad. On the other hand, he was preparing your food, and even though Ice didn't cook, he always made sure to order you something you liked from the restaurant. He cared about you, but he was never able to anticipate your needs, as well as Beau, did. Which was a little bit scary. Neither of them expected anything in return... Or maybe you were wrong? Maybe Beau had some sort of hidden agenda? But what would it be? You didn't have any power anywhere, and you seriously doubted that he would put all this energy into getting to know as much as possible about you just to sleep with you. And even when he was sleeping with you, he didn't do anything you didn't initiate first. For fucks sake, he slept sitting on the floor just so you could hold his arm while you were sleeping... Did you want him to continue? yes. Did you want all this to progress further...? Also, yes. But why...? It's not like you loved him... 

But instead of a coherent train of thoughts, there was a pleasant warmth spilling into your chest. 

It's ridiculous...

You knew him for whole three hot minutes, and you were in a vulnerable emotional state, it was understandable that you latched to a person who showed you the attention and took care of you. It would be crazy if you didn't. 

But the most important question was... If your dad was still alive, would you want the same from him...? 

Your father would kill him.

But would you? 

He would send him for deployment to a fucking North Korea; heavens and hells be damn if that wasn't possible; he'd find a way. 

But would you...?

 

You would.

And that scared you more than you cared to admit. And even though you were scared shitless, the panic started to recede, because it was a completely different type of fear, and you were much more equipped to deal with it. On top of that, there were already some rules set in place, so you knew that you weren't indifferent to him, and that was a good start because complete rejection was already out of the picture. You knew that you would have to talk with him about everything in great detail, but that sounded less scary than you expected... 

But you still curled up into a tiny ball and tightly hugged your knees. You had your back turned to the door, so even though you heard him come in, you couldn't see his face, but as soon as he laid down behind you, you uncurled, turned around, and placed your head on his extended arm. And you felt something hot in between you... He brought a hot water bottle already filled. You looked at it for a good moment without saying a word... Well, he already told you that he cared about you, but everything he did showed you exactly how much time he spent thinking about what you might need and like. 

Just a minute before, you wanted to wrap your arm around his torso and close your eyes, but instead, you looked up, and gently placed your hand on his cheek, running your thumb over his skin, while he clenched his jaw for a fraction of a second, unused to this type of attention. He still had his eyes closed, and his hand was gently drawing unrecognizable patterns on your back.

You rose up a bit and got closer to his face, studying everything with an intensity you didn't suspect you even had in you. You memorized everything as if your life depended on it, and when you were finally satisfied with the image you committed to memory, you placed a light, soft kiss on his jaw, and he froze... He was afraid to open his eyes because he wasn't entirely sure if he didn't imagine what just happened... But the look on your face when he finally caved in, told him that he most definitely didn't. 

He wanted to lean towards you and kiss you until neither of you could breathe; every atom of his body screamed for more and more, and for a split second he was afraid that he'll cave in... But it wasn't time for that... The rational part of his brain was screaming at him that if he did that, he would be the one confusing you and causing you pain in the long run... You weren't ready yet... So instead of getting drunk on your taste, he placed a long, soft kiss on your forehead, and pulled you up a bit, so your faces were on the same level. And when you leaned in to kiss him, it took all he had to stop you from doing that...

- Not yet... - he whispered... - Not like that... - the desperation in his voice spilled into the space between you. You knew he was right, yet you couldn't help wanting, needing, more... But even though his whole body ached, he didn't budge and stayed as composed as he could. And yet, both of you craved more, sohe pressed his forehead to yours, allowing your breaths to synchronize and combine into one. You had to close her eyes because with every second you felt your will crumbling faster and faster... You were lightheaded, your cheeks were flushed, and you just couldn't keep your breath steady. You felt the electricity running through your whole body, setting every nerve ending on fire, making it hard to think. You desperately wanted to say something, do something, but you didn't know what, and you were afraid that if the silence was broken, all the self-control would break along with it...

You gently adjusted your head, allowing your noses to touch for a brief second and you could hear that Beau inhaled sharply when you did that, but you didn't want to tempt the fates even more, so you did your best to stay still.

It took you much more time to get used to this situation than you wanted to admit, even to yourself. But eventually, you did... 

The fire slowly calmed down, and only when you were sure that both of you were in a more rational state, you wrapped your hand around his body, the hot water bottle still in between you, while he gently lifted his arm, allowing you to slide your arm through there and rest it on his ribs. He also reached down, grabbed your leg at the knee, and pulled it higher, so it could rest on his thigh. 

The atmosphere was now much more relaxed, and you were finally able to exhale deeply, releasing all the tension that accumulated in your body. 

- I... - you started, but you didn't know how to finish what you wanted to say, and he didn't press; he knew that eventually you'll find the right words, and fully accepted that most likely won't happen today. You eventually sighed with resignation, but instead of getting frustrated, you hid your face in the nook of Beau's neck and inhaled his scent. 

It wasn't super late, but while you were in bed, the sun definitely hid behind the horizon and the room got dark, while muffled sounds of a military base lulled you to sleep. 

When you woke up in the middle of the night, he wasn't in bed with you, but you could hear a quiet hum of running water from the bathroom. You knew that it was too early for him to actually start working, so he probably just wanted to freshen up after all day of dotting on you. And maybe, just maybe, he wanted to spend as much time with you in the morning as possible... Hum of the water eventually stopped and only after a few minutes, the doors opened letting a small amount of light into the room, illuminating his silhouette. He wasn't wearing anything besides a towel around his hips, and you couldn't help but stare at his chiseled torso. You felt the muscles under his shirt more than once, but it was the first time you actually saw more of him. He was... well... much more in shape than you ever were... 

He didn't realize at first that you were awake, but when he turned around with a fresh set of underwear, shorts, and a t-shirt, he caught the light reflecting in your eyes and he smiled softly. 

- Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up... I went to the gym and I didn't want to get back to bed all sweaty... - well that must have been a sight...

- Could you... - you hesitated for a short moment, but the worst thing he could do right now was to say no. - ...leave the t-shirt off? - your voice was quiet, but he didn't have trouble hearing you in the dead quiet of the night. He was surprised by such a blunt request from you, but after what happened before you fell asleep... He wanted to say no to you, he really did. Because he knew that feeling your touch on his bare skin might be what would push him so far over the line, that he wouldn't be able to go back on his own. 

- I can... - he said despite his better judgment because even though he wanted to refuse your request, he found himself unable to do so... One smile from you and everything else could have gone straight to hell, and he wouldn't even notice.

He quickly went back to the bathroom, put the clothes on, and took one last look in the mirror, giving himself a warning look not to do anything stupid. Gods, he wanted all this to go right... He already knew that he meddled too much when you were in such a fragile state, but he couldn't stay outside, watching you wither away more and more with every passing day. And even the knowledge that you were getting a little bit better with him near didn't stop him from feeling like he was taking advantage of you. 

Not even a full minute passed before he was back in bed, with you, under the duvet... Your bodies were so close that even without touching you could feel the heat radiating off him, although you weren't sure if it was from the shower, previous exercise, or was his body naturally this warm... 

- Would you mind if I touched you...? - your whisper hung in between you two, sparkling with electricity. Even though you were basically glued to him before, this seemed... different. And you felt the need to ask. 

- I wouldn't mind that at all... - he replied even quieter than you asked, but his tone was much steadier and clearer than yours, rational thinking currently jumping out of the window. 

Yet instead of moving your hand to his torso, you started with something more familiar, something you already did... You slowly hooked your leg over his thigh, now painfully aware of where his shorts actually started. It was dangerously easy to connect your body with his, as if you were made for each other, fitting like two pieces of the same puzzle. Next, you shifted your hips, so your pelvis touched the band of his shorts, and what was more important, your abdomen touched his side. It wasn't your intention, and you honestly didn't notice that your shirt rode up a bit... You heard him inhale sharply, and you read it as everything being too much, so you started to retrieve, but it was at this moment that he slipped his arm under your body and pulled you on top of himself, and you had to swallow a moan that wanted to rip through your closed lips... The way he manhandled as if you weighed nothing made you blush, but what surprised you, even more, was that you didn't even have to move, because you were already in perfect position, with your knee bent next to his hip, but not bearing any weight, so it wouldn't hurt in the morning, your head lying flat on his chest, your cheek pressed to his skin, and while your left arm stayed close to your chest, fingers spread on his ribs, the right one somehow found its way higher, and now your hand was pressed gently against his neck...

- Sorry... - he whispered, clearly meaning the sudden change of position. - I felt like you were teasing me, and that could have ended... very badly... For both of us... - somehow you doubted it with your whole heart, but you were too comfortable to protest, so you only hummed in response, not exactly sure what it was supposed to mean. He gently placed one hand on your shoulder blade, and the other on the small of your back, pulling your shirt down a bit, even though you were hidden under the duvet... You knew why he did that, but since you were so close to him, you didn't mind the loss of additional contact. - Is this ok...? - he asked, gently rubbing his thumbs over your body, indicating that he meant the placement of his hands. You only nodded in response, already half asleep, surrounded by his touch and smell.  

Sleep didn't come easy for him, although he already felt like he was dreaming, and he could stay like that till the end of the time. For the first time ever he actually dared to think about his life after the navy... Ever since he joined the academy, he had a clear path in front of him, and he was just one step away from reaching the end of that path... Technically Iceman's replacement wasn't officially picked out just yet, with a few vice admirals sharing the workload unlit then. If someone asked him a month ago, he would have said yes. But now...? Now he actually started thinking if that was what he wanted. Being a COMPACFLT was a demanding job that required a lot of traveling all over the country and he saw how hard it was on Admiral Kazansky. He knew that he'd be able to do it, but... he also knew that if he would have to choose between even one full day with you and the promotion, he would have chosen you every single time... Besides, he enjoyed overseeing Top Gun... Choosing, training, and nurturing the best of the best was fulfilling and gave him the satisfaction of passing his knowledge and skills to the younger generations. And now you found a realistic place in the equation of his life... He knew that it was much too early to actually talk about those things, but he couldn't help thinking of them. About how good it would be to finally sleep together in his bed instead of the uncomfortable cot that somehow became the softest place on Earth... 

He knew for a while that he felt strongly about you, but only now had he begun to understand that having you in his life on a permanent basis was an actual possibility, not only something he dared to fantasize about in the middle of the night... 

And that scared him... Not the possibility of a relationship, but the fact that he was ready to seriously reconsider his whole career right before he reached the top that he dreamed about for so long. Or maybe he just got used to climbing to the top so much, that he didn't realize other options were more appealing to him. But 3 days with you and all that changed... 

He sighed quietly and looked at the braids he made earlier, now barely visible in the faint light of the moon... He wanted to see your face, but it was currently pressed against his bare chest, and the angle made it impossible. He still smiled for a short moment, allowing himself to imagine a few of the happiest futures with you, and that's what eventually made him fall asleep. 

Part 3

A/N 2: Please don’t feel obligated/pressured to reblog, because I write mostly for myself. A comment would be appreciated though :) Love, G.

Love,

G.

[emptystove]

Sparrow - Ch 4

One Piece Fanfic (Drama/Romance/Suspense)

Pairings: E. Kid x Reader, Sabo x Reader, Lucci x Reader (one sided)

Rating: EXPLICIT, 18+ ONLY

Chapter Summary: Decisions are being made by all parties in NWC.

Links to AO3, Wattpad -- Fanfic Master List

Chapter 4: Decisions, Decisions

CP9 Headquarters, NWC Central District

It had already been too long. 

The chances of finding you decreased the longer you were missing. The thought of being out of arms reach of you for this long was painful enough, and he knew it would only get worse as time marched on. Watching you, touching you, savoring your scent. His memories of you weren't enough anymore. Being in your presence and experiencing something new from you, it was the only way he could calm his tormented mind. 

And finally tasting you again. After so very long. If that didn't make him lose himself, the look on your face after he kissed you certainly did. You actually smiled at him. And it wasn't the wry grin you wore when you thought you were being cheeky, it was genuine happiness, contentment. He had only seen you look at him like that once before, and like a sickness invading his very being, it left the feeling of something warm blooming in his chest. Something more than the feral desires you always seemed to elicit from him. 

God, he wanted that feeling back. He would do anything to see you look at him like that again. And if he couldn't have that, he would have the next best thing. He would break through your icy shell like he had done so many times before. He would make you feel something for him as intensely as he felt for you. And if he couldn't have your adoration, he would gladly accept your fear. As long as the intensity was enough. As long as you felt it only for him. He would make you experience fear like you never had before. You deserved it after everything you did to him. 

They would know that fear soon enough, everyone who dared to help in your foolish escape. 

If you didn't have help, he would have already had you back where you belonged. He would be providing you with the appropriate punishment at this very moment. His nostrils flared at the thought. 

"Are you even listening to me?"

How long had she been standing there droning on?

"Report," Lucci demanded coldly. 

Kalifa's posture remained poised and professional even as she let out an exasperated sigh. "We tracked her signal to an abandoned warehouse on the edge of the West District city limits. It seems her tracker was removed and left there. We were able to leverage a few other departments to assist in raiding the remaining safe houses we know about, but there has been no other trace of her."

Lucci sat at the small conference table with one leg crossed over the other. He remained staring out the window as she spoke, taking in the quiet city below. 

"You really made a mess of this one. I don't know how you got your little project approved in the first place. She was never going to be one of us, especially with you training her. If you wanted a pet, you should have locked it up at home, not brought it in and pretended to give it a job."

Lucci turned a menacing eye toward Kalifa. "If there's nothing else." 

Time, it seemed, was not on his side. He didn't care to entertain whatever misplaced opinions she had, especially when it came to him and especially when it came to you. No, the longer you spent away from him the more time those terrorists had to fill your pretty little head with lies. It didn't matter what you were before he found you. You belonged with him now. She may have been right about one thing though. He should have kept you locked away where no one could find you. 

"There is one other thing," Kalifa's tone maintained it's callous professionalism. "Orders from above are to kill her on sight. After your embarrassing display in the subway, they don't want to risk her giving away information about our organization."

"She didn't know anything vital. Even if she told them everything she knew, it wouldn't give them an advantage over us."

"I think you and I both know her very existence gives them an advantage over you." She watched him carefully behind her pristine glasses. "Even if I'm wrong about that, would you actually consider going against their orders?"

Lucci stood and fully turned to face his fellow CP9 member. When he spoke, his tone was as cold and callous as hers was. "We're intelligence officers... We don't care who we face if we have orders."

"Good. Now that that is clear, I'm heading down to finished questioning the criminals we picked up from the station. They aren't anyone we have files on, likely new recruits. We will have to be efficient if we are to get anything out of them before they expire. I really wish you had been more careful with them, but I supposed it's rare for you to leave anyone breathing at all."

"I'll speak with them as well."

Kalifa turned to leave but shot Lucci one last glare in warning. "Fine, but don't expect to use that machine on them. Besides the fact that using it on your little Sparrow started this whole mess, Vegapunk has them restricted from use after one of the prototypes went missing." 

Lucci's eyes narrowed. She turned to exit without waiting more than a moment for a response. If she suspected him of anything more than she had already explicitly stated, there was no way she was willing to confront him or report him to anyone else. Despite how she held herself, it was clear that she was afraid of him. 

He saw her fear through her plastic façade, and it disgusted him. It was so pathetically basic. He remembered the fear on the faces of those who took you from him. It was palpable. He could smell it even as they hid themselves like rats in the shadows. Their fear wasn't misplaced though. For those who managed to remain alive, he looked forward to watching that expression cement into their features as they left this life. 

They wouldn't answer his questions. If the flame emperor was involved, and he was, the fodder he left behind wouldn't know anything of worth. That didn't mean they were completely useless though. 

Whatever he decided to do next, he would have to be careful. He had to get to you before any other agents could. Once he had you back, he could lock you away where no one else could touch you again. Whether it was the RA, the government, or any other pest who thought they could keep you away from him, it didn't matter. He would cage his Sparrow again no matter who tried to stop him. 

Before he could make any of that happen, he had one more thing he needed to do while it was still fresh in his mind. 

----------

Kid's Body Shop, NWC South District

"What the hell is this?" 

Kid moved to the side and turned towards the kitchen entrance, allowing you to see two slightly flustered blonds in the doorway. 

Before either of you could answer, Sabo took quick strides to where you still sat atop the kitchen counter. "When we saw you weren't in the office..."

He trailed off as he took in the sight of you. You were calm, and despite the alcohol you were holding, it was obvious now that you were just here attempting to clean yourself up. 

"I need to tell you something, and it might be difficult to hear," Sabo began, shifting his gaze to his own feet.

"I already know," you replied matter-of-factly. 

Sabo and Killer turned to glare at Kid. 

"What the hell, Eustass?" Sabo's frustration was felt in every word. "I thought we agreed-"

Kid dramatically rolled his eyes at the blond before interrupting him. "I didn't agree to shit, and I didn't tell her either."

"I picked the locks on my handcuffs and listened to everything you said from the hallway," you stated calmly before taking another sip of your beer and glancing back towards Kid. "You really should invest in better restraints if you plan on trying to tie me up again."

Kid raised a brow and sent you a wicked grin that Sabo didn't miss. Before either of them could respond, Killer broke the tension. 

"You seem awfully calm about all of this."

"Yeah, I guess I should probably be freaking out, huh?" You replied thoughtfully before turning to Sabo. "I'm not sure why you would lie, but I'm not sure I believe it. Either way, it seems like you don't want to torture or kill me right now, so it's a big step up from Cipher Pol."

Sabo fumbled with his wallet a few moments before freeing a small item and handing it to you. 

It was a photograph. The edges were worn, and it had a slight discoloration from what looked like being left in the sun for too long. In the center, there were two people laughing, each with an arm around the other's shoulder. A blond boy with bright blue eyes who looked around seventeen and a slightly younger girl. That strange feeling of familiarity was creeping back into your gut. You brushed your thumb across the smaller of the two deliriously happy figures in your hands. It was you. 

"That's, uh," you started, pausing to let out a long sigh. "Ok, so maybe I do believe it."

It made sense. Even without the photographic evidence of you being all chummy with the second most powerful person in the Revolutionary Army, it made sense. You hated your life with CP9, and it only took a year with them to risk death over staying there another minute. They never gave you any details about yourself more than what was necessary. At the time, you assumed it was because they were all assholes who cared more about their orders than their own people. Well, that was true, but the secrecy could all too easily be explained by the fact that they didn't actually know any details about you. You hated how easily you accepted their lies, but at the time being one of them had made sense. You already had the skills of an agent ingrained in you, even if you didn't have your memory. That along with who you saw when you first woke up and what you saw him doing... 

"So what happens now?" 

You needed to stop dwelling on things in the past that you couldn't hope to change, and you needed to start looking to the future. You definitely had things you wanted. Getting your memories back was still number one on your list, but now you had a second goal that might be more attainable. The only problem was you didn't know enough about the people in this room. Before you would let them in on your intensions, you needed to trust that they wouldn't try to stop you when the time came. 

"Right now, we have to prioritize keeping you safe and hidden from the government. And as soon as we can, I'd like to get you looked at by a doctor."

You perked up a bit at that idea. "To look at my brain?" 

"Exactly," Sabo grinned. "We are going to do whatever we can to get your memories back."

You were trying hard not to get your hopes up, but you couldn't stop yourself from smiling. 

"We're still trying to find somewhere we can bring you in the meantime. In the last few hours, eight of our safe houses have been raided."

Your smile fell instantly. "They got raided after I left. Were they...," You swallowed hard. "The ones that were raided... Did I know about them?"

Sabo studied your face. You could tell he knew exactly what you were thinking. You didn't want to believe you were a rat, especially if you had been with the RA as long as they claimed. Just like that your head was swimming again with questions you couldn't answer. 

"There's no way to know how or when they came across that intel. I can promise you this, though. The (Y/n) who disappeared would have sooner died than give up anything on her friends." It was strange. Even though you couldn't remember speaking to him before a few hours ago, you knew he wasn't lying to you. "Right now we need to focus on keeping you hidden. I'll have to take you with me until we can find a place. It's a bit risky but-"

"Tsh. A bit risky?" Kid snorted.

"Didn't you mention CP9 had a 'special interest' in catching her?" Killer agreed. 

"It's not just CP9. Lucci will take this personally." Sabo sent you a look that said he'll definitely be asking you more about that later, and you avoided his gaze by glancing at the digital clock on the wall. "It's been over 4 hours since I ran. I'm guessing you took me here straight away, right? If he had any suspicion that I could be here, he wouldn't hesitate. And I don't see anyone banging down the doors to this place, so it's safe to say they have no idea I'm here. If they are busting up your safe houses, they want to flush me out. Moving me now, especially without another secure location available, is exactly what they want us to do."

Killer turned his attention to Kid, but he was busy scowling at a blank space on the wall, idly flipping the knife in his hand.

 You couldn't risk getting caught now, not before you got the chance to get a second opinion on your messed up brain. 

"I won't be any trouble," you tried.

All three men gave you skeptical looks.

"Ok, I won't be any more trouble. Honestly, I'll curl up on a pile of tires or chill behind some boxes. You won't even know I'm here." 

 Sabo didn't wait for Kid to reply. "I'm afraid that's not an option. I can't afford to continue paying them to hide you here."

Damn. Maybe you shouldn't have gone so hard at the redhead earlier. Offering you a beer was more hospitality than you should have expected anyway. The way those two spoke, it was clear that they weren't really a part of the Revolutionary Army. Even if they were, you had willingly taken part in missions working against the RA for the last several months. They had no reason to help you further, and you had nothing to give them in return. 

"Alright," you sighed. "What's the plan then? Some sort of disguise so I won't get spotted?"

"She can stay."

The two blonds turned towards Kid in surprise. He was still looking away as he spoke, but he casually turned to Sabo as if he was agreeing to nothing more than lending him a pencil. 

"I still expect what you already agreed to though." 

Killer continued eyeing Kid while Sabo turned back to you. You gave him a sheepish smile. You wanted him to be ok with the situation, and you didn't know if it was because you needed his help or because you were starting to like that strangely familiar feeling you got when he looked at you with those striking blue eyes.

Sabo turned to Kid. "You don't do anything for free."

"I don't willing help the damn government get what they want either. Shut up before I change my mind," Kid huffed, turning to Killer as he strode out of the room. "Shop opens in a few hours. Take her upstairs to crash, and make sure she fucking stays put this time." 

Crashing sounded good. Almost as good as knowing you didn't have to spend the next who knows how many hours trying to find another hiding place. With the absolutely absurd realizations that came to light in the last few hours, you looked forward to another dreamless sleep where you didn't have to face your new bizarre reality.

You looked down at your hands to find you were still holding Sabo's picture. You held it out for him to take, but he shook his head. 

"Keep it. I have more." His smile was sweet but laced with regret. He held up a gentle hand but stopped before he could touch you. "I'll contact you as soon as I can."

And with that, Sabo was gone, leaving you alone with Killer. 

You knew he was waiting to take you upstairs, so you got ready to jump off the counter. You hesitated as you looked down at the kitchen floor. It wasn't as bad as the train station by far, but dammit you just got done cleaning off your feet. You were wondering how you might convince them to let you borrow some shoes when you noticed Killer had moved to stand in front of you. He turned his back to you and crouched down.

You blinked a few times. "What are you doing?"

"You just cleaned off your feet right? Hop on. We have to cross through the shop to get to the stairs, and I'd rather you not track any of that through my room."

You slipped yourself onto Killer's back, wrapping your arms loosely around his neck. He held onto your thighs just above your knees as you let him carry you to-

"Wait, did you say you're taking me to your room?" 

"If you prefer, I can leave you in Kid's."

"Uh, I, um," you stuttered as you wondered if they actually did expect something in return for letting you stay with them. 

Killer's shoulders moved up and down as he suppressed a chuckle. "Don't worry, girl. No one will go into my room while you're in there, including me."

His room was surprisingly spacious and clean. It even had a small attached bath, and you were eager to wash the rest of the grime off of you with a hot shower as soon as the large blond man stopped hovering by the door.

"Alright, well, thanks again. I'm just going to shower and crash now," you hinted for him to get the fuck out. 

"There's just one other thing that's been bothering me."

"Just one thing?" You quipped.

"Yeah, I have to admit. I've been dying to know ever since you mentioned it back in the office."

He didn't seem like the type to beat around the bush, but he was hesitating. You raised a brow and motioned with your hand for him to ask what was on his mind already.

"What exactly did Sabo do on the train that made you think he was a pervert?"

Of all the things to be bothered by after everything he learned about you, and that was what was on his mind. You didn't even try to stifle your giggles as you approached him at the door.

"He didn't do anything." 

You laughed harder as he tiled his head at you in obvious disbelief. 

"Goodnight, Killer. And thanks again for everything." 

He waved you off and retreated into the hall as you closed the door and locked it. You leaned against the door and breathed deeply. It must have been the lack of sleep and traumatic evening mixing with your beer, because thinking about these three new people in your life had you grinning like an idiot.

What had you gotten yourself into?

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[REDACTED], NWC [REDACTED] District

. . .

. . .

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. . . L o a d i n g . . .

. . . 

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. . .

E M R   O n l i n e

. . . 

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T e s t  S u b j e c t  0 2 9  S e l e c t e d

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S y n a p t i c  L i n k  E s t a b l i s h e d

. . . 

N e w  R e c o r d i n g  I n  P r o g r e s s . . . 

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Author's Note:

Author: Killer, what are you doing getting our MC so giggly? You aren't listed as a love interest in the tags! Killer: *flips his gorgeous blond locks and crosses his arms, perfectly framing his broad chest.* Author: *dies and goes to heaven*

Well, there you have it. I know this wasn't as suspenseful as previous chapters, but we gotta get this plot rolling if we are going to get MC to see her doctor any time soon!

Let me know what you think, and as always, thank you so so much for reading and commenting!

Previous Chapter | Fanfic Master List | Next Chapter

[trollprincess]

Here’s my thing about the whole Kate Middleton thing.

The Kensington comms team is almost completely and totally to blame for the clusterfuck of the last couple of months.

I think it was an Atlantic article I saw that titled, “I Hope You’re All Happy Now,” and … excuse me? Fuck off. Nobody’s happy. Regardless of what any of us may think of the royal family, a mom with young kids getting cancer fucking sucks. I don’t even like Kate and I hope she gets better soon.

But Jesus hopscotching Christ, my dog could have handled this PR rollout better than the Kensington comms team did. I almost suspect they did it on purpose so they could try to made the speculators feel like shit AND pump up Kate’s approval ratings in the process, which sounds like a conspiracy theory and yet is basically what these people are paid to do.

The problem is you can’t just ask for privacy for the royal family. You can’t. Because unless, for example, Princess Charlotte accidentally fell down some stairs and died, there’s almost literally no one on God’s green internet who’s going to give it to them. When you’re milking the British teat to be an extravagantly wealthy open-source tourist attraction for life, people are shockingly going to pay attention when you’re in public, and when you’re not.

Does Kate have the right to announce her diagnosis on her own terms and in her own time? Of course she fucking does. And this is where the comms team has one of two choices. They either sit Kate down and say, “Sweetie, it’s best to do this early and get it out of the way so people don’t speculate.” Or they allow her her time and then they *do their fucking job*.

That means coming up with an acceptable excuse. “Recovering from stomach surgery” only lasts so long as an acceptable excuse, and it’s not four goddamn months. And “she just wants to take some time off to be with her family” doesn’t work either when you’ve constructed a system where that same family cannot go to the loo without having to smile for the camera if a reporter peeks out of the shower.

Also, your problem as a comms team here is that the king also has cancer, and has announced it, and is still out in public. Of course, nobody gives a shit about seeing Charles. But Kate is blandly nice and pretty and has little kids, and people like her. They’re going to miss her. And you’re going to need to explain very, VERY well why a young woman who’s appeared fine is suddenly nowhere to be found. Especially in a family that’s developed a VERY bad reputation with how they’ve treated princesses who marry into the immediate family the last forty fucking years.

If the comms team were worth what they’re getting paid, they knew damn well that the outcome of saying nothing and providing a flimsy excuse would be months of speculation, sneaking around, jokes, memes, conspiracy theories, etc. You’ve got a scandal-ridden royal family where the king’s married to his long-term mistress, people think his mom somehow killed his last wife, and Uncle Andy’s a sex pest. Oh, and there have been rumors for ages Will’s banging another woman, and having his wife go private for months *is not going to turn that rumor off*.

Look, the best way to do this would probably have been to sit down with Kate and say bluntly, “We can give you time, but too long and people are going to be assholes. We know it’s hard, but … is six weeks good?” (Six weeks is just something to put out there, but maybe four weeks would have been better.)

Does it suck she’d have to do that? Yes. Is it better than letting the world put her through the conspiracy theory ringer for months? YES. Christ, I can’t believe that’s even a question.

[dari-ede]

Seven Times I Hated Kim Seokjin: Ch 3

CHAPTER 3: "When You Kiss Me Heaven Sighs"

Chapters : 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05(M) | 06(M) | 07

MASTERLIST

Pairing: Idol!Jin x Female Character

Rating: M (language and future sexual explicit scene)

Summary: Kim Seokjin really knows how to ruffle my feathers. I was happy with my mundane life. What gave him the right to disrupt it???

Status: Complete

************

"I hope you're aware that nothing funny is going to happen tonight," I told Jin teasingly as I stood at the entrance of his dorm.

He let out a light chuckle as he helped me out of my sweater and hung it along the wall. "I know. I only wanted to bring you here so we could have a little more privacy."

"Why would you want more privacy?" I asked, my eyes narrowing in a chide-like way. I was clearly joking, of course.

He hung his head down in embarrassment as he smiled. "Stop insinuating I'm insinuating things."

"I'm just asking simple questions, is all," I said, turning on my heel and stepping into the open living room.

Looking around the area, one would never guess that seven males in their early to mid-20s lived here. I had a brother and cousin I grew up around and both of them were messy. There were several items that seemed out of place and a few corners I could spot that were dirty, but overall, it was pretty clean and neat. A skeptical part of me believed Jin had thoroughly cleaned the area right before I arrived. The smell of floral chemicals were lingering in the air.

"So, what are you planning on doing with me if it isn't to stain my virtue?" I asked, turning to him.

His smile had yet to leave. Motioning me to follow him, we went over to the kitchen.

On the stove, I could see he was preparing something. It smelled pretty good. The smells worked like magic and pulled me in. I found myself hovering over the stove, my mouth salivating at the sight below me.

Jin had prepared a good amount of food and it all looked intoxicating.

There was a reason I had never been slim in my life. I loved food too much to give it up. For a good portion of my life, I had considered becoming a chef. However, after finding out from professional chefs that they hardly cooked at home due to their vocation, I let go of that possibility. It thrilled me when I made a dish for my loved ones. It was more important to me to create something for my family to enjoy than it was to create something for complete strangers. I had other skills, so it wasn't too heartbreaking to let go of that dream.

"It should be done already," Jin said as he took a spoon to get a taste. After tasting it, he gave a nod of approval and turned off the stove. Then, pretty expertly, he finely chopped some green onion and began to set the food up on different dishes.

I tried to help, but he swatted me away and demanded to wash my hands so I would be ready to eat. I gave a small pout but did as I was told.

It was our fourth date. The previous ones had all been different. The first date had been a very nice dinner. We had gone on a nice walk along the river once during sunset on our second date. Not many people were present, so we were able to feel a little at ease. And on the last date, we went to a bar and had a private room to ourselves where he showed me how to play pool. It was there that I mentioned to him I loved to cook. My mother developed arthritis when I was very young. She loved cooking, but due to her condition, she decided to teach me everything she knew. Since then, I had always cooked for myself. Other than take-out and at restaurants, no one had ever cooked for me since then.

"Well, that's about to change," he had said with a voice of conviction.

It was the confidence that made my heart flutter and made me feel a little hot. Truth be told, while Jin was physically gorgeous, his face nor his shoulders were his best attributes. The most attractive thing about Kim Seokjin was his confidence. There was a self-assuredness he carried with him that took hold of my attention. He didn't seem to like someone in his 20s; more like well into his 30s.

I had to admit, it was definitely a nice change from dating guys who didn't know themselves very well and questioned everything they did.

Jin managed to take all the plates to the table himself. He took out a nice bottle of wine as well. A warm smile on his face, and his warm brown eyes met mine as he pulled a chair out for me.

His gentlemanly ways were also gaining a lot of points.

Once I was settled in my seat, he sat across from me and we started to eat.

The conversation was the same as our others: giving small bits of information about our personal lives. Every now and then we shared stories or info that went a little deeper.

I opened up about the stress I felt financially. I was doing ok, but there were times that I wished I had a little more so I didn't have to be so frugal with my money. Thankfully, I had gained the promotion, so that had taken much of the pressure off my shoulders.

Jin then went on to share his struggles of being an idol. What bothered him more than anything was the inability not to do whatever he wanted. He felt restraints coming from all over.

I had known him for not even a month, but I believe I had learned how to read his face and energy a little more clearly. As he spoke of his lack of freedom, I felt the heartbreak.

Jin didn't seem to wallow in disappointment too much because he began to list all the things he enjoyed about his job. One of his favorites was touring. However, that came with a negative.

"I get to see different cities, cultures, and most importantly, fans. But then I'm away from home. It's difficult to stay in contact with loved ones from another country. Calling family and friends becomes a struggle," he said as he took a sip of his wine.

His voice had a slight hint of sadness. I kept my eyes on him and listened intently.

"We're set to go back on tour in a few weeks and we have some things to do on our schedule for America. Prepping for the tour and schedule is going to be quite busy," he said, his mouth turned downward.

"How long will you be gone?" I asked, a feeling of disappointment creeping in just a little.

I had gotten so used to him these last few weeks. On top of our dates, we had talked on the phone and messaged each other almost every day now. Hearing that communication wouldn't be the same was disheartening.

"A little over a month." He looked up, catching my eyes.

Quietly, I nodded. I took a slow bite of the food, letting the information he was giving me sink in.

This was one of the many reasons I didn't want to date an idol. They had hectic schedules that didn't give them much of a personal life. The communication between us came in waves throughout the day as it was. Sometimes, I would go hours without hearing from him, but then we would be talking non-stop for a solid two hours. His schedule wasn't consistent, so I was left checking my phone every ten minutes.

Yeah, dating an idol wasn't a good idea. Maybe after he left for his tour he would forget about me. By the time he came back, he might stop calling me and find some other chick to laugh at his jokes and drool over his gorgeous face.

How long until he left, though? How many more dates did I have until Kim Seokjin walked out of my life?

There was a slight cramp in my chest all of a sudden. I coughed it up to heartburn and tried to ignore it.

"When will you be leaving for the tour?" I asked, trying to sound casual as the jab in my chest deepened.

"In a couple of weeks." His eyes stayed on me as if trying to get a reading out of me.

I felt taken aback. "Two weeks?!"

He gave a slight nod but didn't say anything. His eyes followed me closely.

My stomach started to feel a little unsettled now. What the hell did I eat that was making me feel so bad all of a sudden?

"That's not too long from now," I said, wondering why I was sounding pouty.

"I wanted to see you as often as I could before things got too busy," he then began. "I don't have any days free, but there are gaps late in the day where we can hang out. Or you can probably come on set and hang out behind the scenes."

I frowned at this. "Girls are allowed to come around?"

"Yeah. Some of the other guys have girlfriends too and they come around while we're—" his eyes became wide as he caught himself.

I had caught it as well. "Other guys have girlfriends, too." I felt my cheeks get hot.

Suddenly, that self-confident guy disappeared. "I didn't mean to say 'too'. Sorry, that's a mistake. Of course, I don't consider you my girlfriend—I haven't asked you properly yet, so—" he stumbled on his words once more and his eyes grew wider with worry and embarrassment.

I was finding the room pretty stuffy and warm. I took a sip of water, trying to cool myself.

"Not yet, I meant that if you were to be my girlfriend, I would definitely ask and not just assume. It would be very impolite of me to do that and I want you to know that I very much respect you." Jin was speaking so fast that I had trouble believing his lips were actually moving.

Thump!

The sudden crashing noise made the two of us jump in our seats. Jin let out a scream of shock. I covered my head out of impulse. I didn't do well with loud noises.

"Oh, sorry," came a gruff voice off in the distance.

"Ah, Yoongi-ah," Jin said. "You scared me."

Seeing that nothing bad had occurred following the noise, I felt it safe to peek out of my arms and turn to where the noise and voice had come from.

A slim figure wearing all black was straightening a lamp up. That's probably what had fallen down.

My arms came down and I took some breaths to try to slow my heart rate.

The slim figure shuffled his way a little closer to us. He looked like a sloth by his slow movements. He had a bucket hat on that was covering half his face; I wasn't completely sure if he was even human.

"Aren't you supposed to be in bed?" Jin asked in a scolding manner. "You're sick, remember?"

Sloth man let out a low grunt. "Need more tea."

"The kettle is on," Jin informed him. "Want me to prepare it?"

"I got it." The sloth creature finally reached us. He glanced at me and he gave a light greeting gesture. "I'm Yoongi."

I introduced myself to him, giving him a smile after meeting his eyes. Yeah, he was a guy. A very sick-looking guy.

As Yoongi made his way toward the kettle, I noticed the clock on the wall. Shit, I really needed to get home. I had something due for work tomorrow. Jin knew this and had agreed to take me home by a certain time.

"Jin—the time," I said, motioning him to take a look at the clock.

Jin turned and let out a curse under his breath, which he quickly apologized for. "I'll call a car. It shouldn't take them too long to get here." He took out his phone to make the call.

"Can I use your restroom?" I asked, getting up from my seat.

Jin nodded, pointed to the hall Yoongi had walked out of a bit ago and gave me directions on how to get there.

I couldn't imagine how long I had stayed over. I had hoped it would only be two hours, but we had doubled that. I sent my coworkers a quick email letting them know my portion of the work might get to them a little late. Truth was that I was done with it, but still wanted to go over it one final time before submitting it.

After I was done, I came out of the restroom. I was walking down the hall and about to enter the living room when I heard Jin and Yoongi talking. I caught my name, so I pulled back and decided to hear what they had to say.

"You're lucky I was here. I saved you from that embarrassment," I heard Yoongi say with a light chuckle.

"What embarrassment?" Jin asked defensively.

Yoongi let out a low laugh. "You were making a fool out of yourself with her. Kept stumbling over your words. You should have seen how red you got."

"How long have you been watching us?!" Jin demanded.

"A while."

"A while?!"

"Hey, it's not my fault you have no perception of time with her. I agreed to stay there for two hours. You should be grateful because I sent the young ones a message to not come home for another two hours. They would have walked through that door and made things worse for you." Yoongi's voice definitely sounded sick, but he sounded extremely perky.

Jin let out a grunt. "That would have been a pain to deal with."

"I should have recorded it though and sent it to them."

"What?"

"How you look with her. Really, you couldn't keep your eyes off her as you blabbered on about how much you respect her."

Smack!

Yoongi let out a laugh then a groan. "That hurt."

"I think it's time you go."

"I gotta say goodbye first. It would be very impolite of me. And I very much respect her—" he started to say with a mocking tone.

Smack!

Another laugh and groan from Yoongi. "Ow. You haven't hit me that hard in years. You must really like her."

"Out," Jin demanded.

Yoongi let out another chuckle. "Ok, ok, ok."

I knew I couldn't stay hidden anymore. I pretended as if I had just walked out of the restroom and Yoongi and I met at the end of the hall, next to the living room.

Yoongi made eye contact with me as he held onto his tea. He greeted me, saying my name pretty loud. I knew he was making sure Jin heard. "It was nice meeting you," he said while he bent his neck.

I bent mine back to him. "Nice to meet you as well."

"I'm sure I'll see you again," he said with a smirk and walked away.

I saw him disappear into the hall. Turning back, I saw Jin walking towards me.

He gave a small smile. "There was a driver nearby. He should be downstairs shortly." He motioned towards the door.

I made my way over to him and together we put on our sweaters and shoes. Jin made sure to put on his mask, just in case anyone outside caught us.

Once downstairs at the entrance, there was a black van waiting for us. We made our way in and were driven to my apartment.

We spoke a little on our ride.

Once we reached my apartment complex, Jin insisted on walking me to my front door.

As we made our way into the building, I asked for one of the recipes he had used, but he refused to give it to me.

"Why can't I have it?" I asked with mocking irritation.

"I'd rather teach it to you," he explained. "We'll do it all together. Prepping, cleaning, mixing, cooking. It'll be fun."

An image of Jin and I cooking together came into view and I couldn't help but feel the excitement. Cooking was something I always enjoyed doing and every date I'd had with Jin had been quite meaningful. To combine both things, I was sure he would have me melting.

"I'll look forward to it," I said as I stopped. We arrived at my door.

"So this is your place?" he asked, nodding to the door.

I gave a nod and looked into his beautiful features. "Thank you for today. It was nice to have someone else cook for once."

"It was my pleasure." His voice was low and sultry as he took a step closer. There was a look in his eye that I had seen before in guys. And the half smirk on his lips told me I was right on my suspicions.

My heart rate began to spike. I opened my mouth to come up with an excuse for needing to hurry inside, but the words never came out.

Pillowy, soft lips were gently placed on my lips. The feeling of warm, large hands came on either side of my hips, pulling me closer to him. My eyes closed as my heart fluttered. Butterflies flew all around my stomach once I felt his lips move along mine. I lightly felt the tip of his tongue brush on my top lip. Instinctively, my arms came around his neck, holding him tight. My lips moved against his as well. He went on to hold onto my bottom lip and tugged at it using the right amount of suction. The kiss was soft and gentle at first, making me feel like I was in the clouds. But slowly, it became a little intense. On tongues stayed inside our mouths, but the movement of his lips and how they nibbed at mine with the right amount of pressure...made me feel like my skin was on fire.

I heard a noise come out of me I had never heard before. And I felt the smirk upon his lips immediately following the noise. He was so damn proud of himself.

And I hated him.

Hated him for the way he kissed.

-------------------

Chapters : 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05(M) | 06(M) | 07

MASTERLIST

[coffeeheartaddict2]

What happens in Vegas does not always stay there.

Book: Open Heart (book 2 rewrite)

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x f!mc Casey Valentine

Warnings: language,physical confrontations, sexual references (masturbation)

Rating: Mature

Summary: Casey and Ethan find it difficult to get into a professional rhythm, especially with their personal feelings still simmering hot. Vegas, the fallout and some confrontations.

Word count: 2873

Authors note: When I wrote this originally way back in 2020, it was a reimagining of what Canon gave us. Never in my wildest dreams did I think this would be a cornerstone of my open heart world. As such upon Re-reading there were some changes that I felt needed to be made. This chapter will probabaly have the most changes. There are some physical confrontation in this chapter. I still kept it, but I did make changes and I will be exploring more of what lead to it. I am happy to discuss this further via ask box or DM.

Disclaimer: Characters belong to Pixelberry.

✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️

It has been two weeks since that emotion charged evening when Casey and Ethan ended their relationship. Despite his cool exterior he was still torn internally. They had agreed that they would try to be friends as they working together. But it was hard to go back to a pre relationship setting when you had a taste and the feelings of love that he felt towards Casey could not be switched off. He also missed her as a confidante. His mother was still in Edenbrook. The mandated three days had long passed , so he decided to put her through the team. The years of addiction were taking its toll. He was looking into rehabilitation options for her, however, he did not know what to do. Did he open the wounds and hear her out? This is when he needed Casey, his friend but with so much feeling for him still simmering he thought better of it. He knew he was not alone in these feelings as every time he saw her he could see his feelings reflected in her.

There was also the issue of June. Casey told him that it was June who started the gossip. He had no idea why she did it. She had not caused any issues since he was keeping an eye on her.

The team meeting ends and he notices Dr Valentine hanging back.

“Something on your mind Cas...sorry Dr Valentine?”

He again mentally chastises himself for nearly calling her something so familiar.

“I need to take some time off, short notice this weekend. Will that be alright with you? I am wanting take Friday, Saturday and Monday off.” She looks at me nervously, the last time she looked like that is when she told me about Mrs Martinez. I know she needs me as a friend but it is a slope I am not too eager to hop on but I try to frame it professionally as possible.

“Of course you can have the time off.” I say, “Is there anything else that I can help you with? You look like you have a lot on your mind.”

“Nothing I can’t handle Eth... Dr Ramsey.” I know she is lying, I can see her visibly holding back her emotions- She thanks me for approving the time off and goes to do her rounds.

I make my way back to my desk and pinch the bridge of my nose, hoping that whatever she needs the time off for is not going to jeopardize her career.

Later that day Casey sits at Derry Roasters with Sienna for a mid afternoon coffee break.

“Did you tell Dr Ramsey about why you needed the time off?”

I take a deep breath,

“I know he saw all the emotions running through me and all I wanted to do was tell him everything, about how we were going to take down Declan. He deserves to know, I mean it is taking down Declan and I know he was annoyed that he could not get out of the deal he got the hospital into, but I still want him so badly it physically hurt sometimes but I just could not say anything to him so all I did was ask without saying why.”

“Still hurts that much does it?”

“If we were still together I would have told him at home. I know he recognised some of the emotions I was having and I know he was having the same. I just want to be over this pain already!”

Sienna puts her hand on my shoulder.

“Just breathe.” I do as she says.

I look at the time. We better head back. As we walk through the Atrium, Aurora calls out to us. “What brings you back here?” I ask

“Just dropping some stuff off- I can not believe this merger may actually work!” I smile, probably the most genuine one I have smiled in a few weeks.

“That and Vegas- I have a good feeling about this weekend.”

Ethan, meanwhile is in the DT office, researching rehab options and enjoying his coffee. He noticed that Casey must’ve cleaned the machine, he made note to remember to message her to thank her. He is so engrossed that he does not hear June enter, until he hears noises from the coffee machine.

“What are you doing Hirata?” Said Ethan, angrily, “when did I give you permission to use the coffee machine?”

“I thought the machine was for all of us.” Statted June, “But I won’t use it again.” She says sheepishly.

To Ethan it is not about the coffee machine, it the was games, the manipulation, the undermining of other team members and not recently the spreading of what happened on Dagger mountain which lead to his current break with Casey. All of that coupled with everything with Louise, well he was a tinderbox waiting to go off.

“What has gotten into you Dr Hirata?”

June looks perplexed.

“What is to gain from your mind games,huh?” Said Ethan. “Why do you need to be in control so much and do you care that your games hurt others or does that not occur to you?”

“What, the feelings you have for Casey are… legitimate?” Asked a shocked June. “I will concede she knows her stuff and does come up with some complex diagnosis, but best intern?” She can see Ethan Is seething. “ Surely you had Naveen select her and of course you can do no wrong in his eyes.”

Ethan now is in a white rage. He slaps her.

“It is none of your goddamn business June but my feelings are genuine and they also had no bearing on the competition….”

“That is bullshit Ethan…”

“Believe what you want, but if your games start to interfere with the running of this team, consider your days more numbered than Edenbrook’s!” Ethan grabs his bag and storms out.

June messages Tobias and he makes his way to the office. She tells him of the confrontation and how he slapped her. Tobias was not surprised that he had a verbal stoush with June but slapping her, that was low even for Ethan. He was even more surprised that June was not going to take it to HR. She told him that he has dirt on her so it would not be worth it. Tobias began to wonder what June was playing at. He takes his leave and goes to find Ethan, he may not overly care for June but it was never ok to hit a female.

Ethan stops by Louise’s room to check on her. She seems to be going better than this morning and leaves before she can spot him.

He makes his way to the parking lot and sees Ethan.

“You have a lot of nerve Ramsey” he yells

Ethan looks annoyed.

“What the fuck do you want Carrick?”

“Care to tell me why you slapped June then?”

“Not particularly”

“Never known you to hit on a woman Ethan. What, is Valentine not satisfying enough for you?”

Tobias has now reached Ethan and Ethan shirt fronts Tobias and shoved him up against the car.

“I have suspected that there was something between the two of you since the softball game, I also knew June had her suspicions and we were correct…”

Ethan maintains his grip but is shocked.

“You what…”

“You heard me Ethan”

Ethan let’s go, Tobias is relieved until Ethan punches him.

“That was for using Casey in your mind games with June. I suppose it was you that told June that he was in your care?”

“Yeah it was me and I have been feeling bad about it since. It could have happened at Kenmore and it was my fault. Do I feel bad that Casey got caught up? Yes. But since when do you enter a relationship? Especially with your resident?”

“Me and Casey, Carrick is none of your business.”

Both men are simmering with emotion by now.

“Yeah well what you do in your spare time became my business when you slapped June.” Retorted Tobias.

“Well you should have thought about that when your games started hurting others.” Ethan refrains from hitting him again and moves to make his way to the car.

“What, you are telling me that you did not fuck your intern to advance her career? I have known you too long Ramsey, you do not do relationships.”

Ethan’s blood was boiling with rage. He shirt fronted him again.

“Would you like to repeat that?” Said Ethan through gritted teeth. “You knew me in medical school but you do not know me now.” He shoves Tobias and enters his car and drives off.

Ethan arrives home and has a drink of one of his more expensive scotches to calm down. He reflected on his confrontation with Tobias, especially where Tobias felt bad for the senator and what happened. The whole team missed the red flags until it was too late. He still missed their friendship after all this time and a brief thought of reconciliation did happen after the team came to help but he could not help but feel that was off the table again. He did feel lighter for getting some of the anger off his chest but at what cost. This was a question for another time he thought. He went to bed, again longing for the woman he wished to be there.

It is the next day, June has called in sick and Ethan arrives at work earlier than usual as he could not sleep. Ethan enters the office and sees Casey is already there working. Ethan goes to make them some coffee. The noise of the coffee machine stirs Casey from her work. “Oh, good morning Dr Ramsey.”

“What are you doing in this early? Oh and thank you for cleaning machine the other day.”

Casey smiles briefly. “I could not sleep and I wanted to get my reports done before my leave.”

“Fair enough” says Ethan whilst continuing to make their coffee.

Ethan looks at her working wishing that he could just hug her and kiss her once again. The coffee is made. He could not help but notice that Casey was on edge and asked her how she is? Casey was not sure how to respond, there was a lot going on currently and it was not all pertaining to the trip to Vegas this weekend

“Do you want the short version or the long version?”

Ethan sensing her mixed emotions asks her “How is everything going with your intern?”

“I think I know how you were feeling last year when Mrs M blew up in my face- it is frustrating though as I do not know what happened for sure and she won’t tell me.”

“What do you think happened?” Asked Ethan looking more concerned.

“I hope you don’t think I am a horrible person for thinking this but I think she did what has been alleged and that she did what was asked of her. I pulled her up for her conduct towards the patient and she seemed almost offended that I thought that. I think it clouded her judgment.”

Ethan puts his hand on hers and squeezes briefly before letting go.

“No, I don't think your horrible for thinking that. You would base your opinion on what you know.”

Casey smiles briefly at Ethan. “Thank you Dr Ramsey.” Casey briefly grabs Ethan’s hand and squeezes and then lets go. They finish their coffee and work in comfortable silence.

It is Friday night, normally Ethan would have stopped off at Donahues but he decides to go home. Even though things are slowly becoming less awkward post break up with Casey, he still yearned for her. He poured himself a scotch and drank it in a single gulp. He poured another, deciding to savour it. He sat down on his couch and listed to some opera. For some unknown reason he grabs his phone and opens pictogram. He still only has the one friend, but still from time to time he looks.

He opens Casey’s page. His eyes open in amazement. She is in Vegas with her friends, explains the time off he thinks to himself but that is not the focus of his attention. His eyes are drawn to a photo with the caption dressed to kill. Ethan’s breath catches. He feels an all to familiar stirring in his pants as he begins to stiffen. He hits like on the photo and puts his phone away and decides to have a shower and turn in for the night. He tries to think of work, his dad, his search for a rehab facility for Louise, all to try and take his mind off Casey and that dress to kill the raging hard on but it is to no avail. “Goddamnit!” He says to himself. With one arm braced on the wall for support with the steamy water cascading over himself he starts to stroke his rock hard cock. All he can think about is Casey wearing that dress, and how much he wished she was here. How much he wanted to take her up against the window and have her body writhing with pleasure as he works her over with his tongue, enjoying the sweet taste of her sex. As the pleasure intensifies within him he thinks about his cock inside her and how much he loves the sensation. The pressure can not build anymore and it was a physically and emotionally charged release as his load blew. He leans against the wall and mutters to himself “fucking hell Ramsey-what pull does this girl have over you?” Within that moment he realises, not only does he still love her but she is worth the risk and swears to try and win her back.

Meanwhile in Vegas, Casey and the gang have had a productive evening. The managed to get a recording of Charlotte St Yves admitting to Medicare fraud and the recording has been sent to Jackie’s friend at the New York Times. Casey feels an element of relief, it was Panacea’s greed that lead to such drastic measures in saving Mrs Martinez however briefly. Her and her friends partied hard when the Panacea cohort left enjoyed far too much champagne. The thought of rebound sex with Bryce was tempting, however she still felt like she would be cheating on Ethan so decided against it. Casey heads back to the penthouse. She looks at the view and remembers the time whilst she was suspended that she had sex with Ethan in his apartment and how he took her up against the window. “Damnit Casey! You are here to forget about him.” No matter how hard she tries to forget, she can’t ignore the pressure build between her legs. She makes her way to the bathroom and has a shower. The next thing she knows she starts rubbing herself, she circles her clit in ever tighter circles, wishing it was Ethan’s thumb or tongue. These thoughts get her perilously close and she inserts a finger and then another. She thrusts them in and out until she releases. She is not as satisfied as she thought she would be, nothing compares to the real thing but it has taken the edge of. She gets ready for bed and looks at her phone. An alert on her screen advises that Ethan liked her photo. She sends him a text.

CV: Surely you have better things to do on a Friday night than stalk me on Picta. Thanks for the like though- had a productive night.

She then goes to sleep.

The gang enjoy the rest of their trip to Vegas.

It is Tuesday and everyone is back to work. The story with Panacea and the medicare fraud is broken. Dr Ramsey catches up with Dr Valentine in the hallway. He greets her and asks her, “Panacea, was that the productive night you had in Vegas?”

Casey smiles, “I did it for Mrs M”

“Well for the record she would be proud and so am I”

Dr Valentine blushes, “careful Dr Ramsey, flattery will get you places where I know we shouldn’t go.”

“Glad your back safe Dr Valentine.”

Casey heads to the free clinic for her shift with a renewed sense of vigour, Panacea gone and slowly getting less awkward being around Ethan, now the situation with Esme needs resolution. She calls a patient name and it is the Coates’ lawyer. Casey does not answer her questions, despite her suspicions about the allegations being right. The lawyer is frustrated but does not push further. She makes her way out of the clinic and sees Sienna and Jackie and then Aurora. Aurora mentions that Mass Kenmore has been brought out by Solomon health. We all head to Declan’s old office with the note payback’s a bitch.

Casey is numb- she can not believe that they were outplayed and that Edenbrook’s days are numbered then the sadness kicks in at the fact the one person she wants to be comforted by is her ex boyfriend which she knows is asking for trouble, instead her and her friends find comfort in each other.

Authors note: that is is a wrap on chapter 15 in Tashland.

I hope you are all enjoying the rewrite of a rewrite and again if there is anything you want to discuss please reach out via DM or ask box.

Tagging: @jerzwriter @jamespotterthefirst @genevievemd @potionsprefect @liaromancewriter @cariantha @bex-la-get @a-crepusculo @crazy-loca-blog @tessa-liam @trappedinfanfiction @peonierose @binny1985 @schnitzelbutterfingers @lucy-268

@choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics

[abyssal-ali]

you don’t need to save me/but would you run away with me (actually you do need to save me I’m kind of tied up here)

Pairing: Jasonette

Rating: T+

WC:~2500

A/N: Boldly made me do it. It was supposed to end like 1k in and then it ran away from me. Please leave your disbelief at the door--and also any knowledge of Germany. Thank you, and happy reading! (Cross-posted to ao3)

Jason struggled to slip his bonds, but his captor had also trained with the League of Assassins and had made sure he was unable to escape. The struggle was futile, but he hated to portray the expression of giving in, even if it was just to conserve his strength for a future escape attempt.

He angrily huffed a white bang out of his eyes to glare harder at Nyssa, who was unperturbed and had her back to him in a display of nonchalance and confidence in her bonds. 

Which…was validated by the various chains, ropes, and nth metal handcuffs this close to cutting off his circulation.

Behind Nyssa and to Jason’s right, a black blur caught his eye as someone or something blipped into his peripheral vision. At first glance, Jason thought it was one of Nyssa’s assassin goons, but a second glance revealed the difference in clothing and movement. This was not an assassin–from Nyssa’s team, anyways.

The question was, were they on his side, her side, or their own side?

Jason made eye contact and opened his eyes wide, glancing down at his restraints. It couldn’t get worse than this, could it?

Okay, apparently it could, there was some ominous bubbling black stuff in their hand that did not look OSHA-approved.

Jason weighed his choices. Be subjected to whatever Nyssa was planning (unfortunately, she’d been trained by assassins and wasn’t like the Gotham Rogues, who monologued and gave away their plans, which meant Jason was subjected to the mental torture of not knowing what would happen–he had some ideas, though, considering the radioactive-green spicy water), or be subjected to Unknown’s fizzy substance.

…And the fizzy substance just dissolved all his bonds into nothing, good to know.

 Unknown made some hand gestures Jason recognized and explained the plan.

Unknown crept towards Nyssa, who was almost done preparing whatever she needed, and Jason headed back out of the cave to take care of the guards and get their weapons.

Two knocked-out assassins later (this was clearly an undercover mission if Nyssa only had two guards on duty with her) and four swords, seven knives, and a handful of throwing stars and blades later, he returned to watch Unknown and decide to help or hinder them.

Unknown had knocked Nyssa out and was leaning over the Lazarus Pit.

The bubbly black appeared in their hand again and Unknown dipped it into the Pit.

The knockoff Mountain Dew evaporated in a cloud of green and black fumes, making Unknown cough and wave their hand in front of their face.

“Ugh, the stench is always the worst,” they groaned, unwrapping their head covering and swinging it in a circle as a makeshift fan, blowing the last remaining traces away.

The lamps on the wall– al Ghuls, always so dramatic– flared higher as the noxious substance hit them, then settled down to the occasional flicker.

Unknown turned around, shaking their black hair down in relief.

Jason stared at the woman.

She stared at him.

“You’re still here?” she looked confused.

“Uh…yeah. Cool trick you got there,” he nodded at the empty pool.

She looked down, a small smile on her face. “Yeah. Do you know why you were tied up?”

“I assume Nyssa wanted me for some experiment with the Lazarus Pits, but she’s an assassin–she’s very close-lipped.”

“So you know about the Pits…” Unknown mused.

“I do. How do you? You don’t look very League of Assassins-y.”

“I’m part of a sect that created the Pits in the first place. It was an accident. Are you part of the League, too?”

“I was. Left a few years ago; I’m mostly a freelancer. So you mean no one any harm?” he tightened his grip on the knife in his pocket momentarily.

“I mean no one any harm,” swore Unknown. “I’m globetrotting to destroy the Pits so they can’t be abused anymore. Do you mean anyone any harm?”

“Not currently,” he snorted. “You can call me Jay.”

“I’m Mari,” she nodded politely at him, still keeping a safe distance between them. 

“Can you tell me more about this sect? I kind of thought the Pits just appeared one day.”

Mari cracked a smile. “They did. At the very beginning of my sect, some of the…beings we work with were playing around and created the Pits. The sect didn’t think it would amount to much, since nothing was happening and no bad things occurred because of them. A few centuries later, people discovered the Pits and found a way to use them, though it was only a one-time thing before the Pits were rendered useless.”

“They were single-use? But-”

Mari nodded at Jason’s realization. “Nyssa al Ghul found a way to stabilize them and make them reusable. My sect had almost died out at that part so nothing was done about it, but now it’s been revived some, and I’m here to track down all the leftover Pits and stop this from happening again.”

“Thanks for rescuing me,” Jason said, finally remembering his manners. Alfred raised him better than that.

“Happy to help,” she said neutrally. “Do you need help returning to…wherever Nyssa found you?”

“If you could tell me approximately where I am, that would be great. I was out of it for part of the journey.”

“We’re in a small cave system in the middle of the Black Forest, in Germany.”

“Oh, okay, thanks.”

Mari stood and finally approached him. “Shall we exit together? Better safe than sorry in a cave.”

He snorted. “Sure. So, any chance I can get to know you better?”

She looked him up and down out of the corner of her eye, gauging if he was serious.

“You are a strange man, Jay. You seriously want to get to know me better?”

“Yep! I’ve always liked strong, deadly women. Wonder Woman is my favourite superhero.”

“Huh. I do find you intriguing as well, so…why not. My friends are always telling me to stop planning so much and live in the moment.”

“You sound like you’d fit in well with my family, then.”

“How big is your family? I’m an only child.”

“Uh, depending on the day, I have about six siblings–all adopted–but my dad has probably adopted someone to take my place again by the time I get back. He has a serious issue. And...yeah…no mom. Although I kind of got adopted by Talia? She sometimes drops in on me when she’s in the area checking in on my little brother, her bio son.”

“You must love your family lots,” observed Mari. “You seem happier talking about them.”

“I do? Ew.”

Mari giggled. “That’s a good thing. I’ve always wanted a big family…If this actually goes anywhere, I’d love to meet them all.”

“You may regret saying that.”

They reached the beautiful outdoors and Jason realized with slight surprise it was the middle of the night. The passage was dark but lit with flickering lamps like the chamber, which messed with his perception of reality.

Ah, nothing he wasn’t used to. Good times.

He breathed deeply, enjoying the fresh, cool air and stunning view of the night sky. Quickly going through a couple basic katas to stretch and loosen up his muscles helped calm him from the niggling claustrophobic feeling left over from the cave and passageways.

Once he was calm, he turned to Mari, who had done a few stretches of her own while waiting for him. “Are you ready to go, or do you have other business to attend to?”

“I can stick with you for a bit.” She moved to be by his side, her body heat warming him, and pointed in the direction she wanted to go. 

His fingers itched to hold hers but he restrained himself. Good grief, what was wrong with him? He didn’t even know her full name!

They discussed random things as they hiked through the forest to the closest village, which Mari said was Schwarzenburg. 

Jason noticed they hadn’t run into any hiking trails yet, even though many ran through the region. “Mari, I don’t suppose you’d happen to know why we are still not on a proper trail yet, hmm?”

The moonlight that filtered through the canopy showed a hint of his companion’s flustered-ness.

“So…uh…I just didn’t want it to end, okay? You’re really interesting and I think I like you!” she blurted.

“Well, good, ‘cause I like you too. We don’t have to part ways for a while, and there’s this miraculous thing called a cellphone that lets you communicate with people halfway across the world at any time! I don’t suppose you have one of them so that I can contact you?” he joked, wondering why she’d stiffened at the beginning.

She playfully hit his arm. “I do have one, as a matter of fact. I’ll give you my number when we finally part ways, as long as I get yours in return.”

“Deal.” Jason held out his hand and they shook on it, but he didn’t let go afterwards, simply continuing their trek and swinging their joined hands happily.

Eventually, Mari led them to the actual trails and they made their way to Schwarzenburg, where a lovely cafe fed them a delicious breakfast.

Mari compared notes on the pastries from her parents’ bakery, entertaining him with her interjections.

After breakfast, Jason stopped at a general store to buy some items, such as a phone, a change of clothes, a backpack, and some things that would make him seem more tourist than ex-kidnapped-assassin who was wanted by several law-enforcement agencies while Mari got the passes for the train, which would take them to Paris.

He texted his family to let them know he was safe and not to put up another monument, that he’d be back sometime in the next week, he was perfectly fine and just on a spur-of-the-moment vacation (no one could argue against that since Alfred has been hounding him for months to take a break.)

The duo spent the 11-hour train ride getting to know each other better by playing games like Truth or Dare, 2 Truths and a Lie, and 20 Questions.

By the time they arrived at the patisserie, it was late and Mari forced him to stay the night. Her parents were already in bed (as bakers, they were early to bed and early to rise), so she simply climbed up the walls to her balcony and he followed.

He insisted on sleeping on the floor, just in case her parents decided to pop in and also because the bed wasn’t quite big enough for two people when one was his size, even though she was fairly petite.

The mouth-watering aroma of fresh-baked pastries woke Jason the next morning. He looked around, confused. He’d slept through the night, which wasn’t rare, but was unusual, considering he was in a new place and he hadn’t done much recon before sleeping.

After being practically glued to Mari’s side over the past 24 hours, he guessed that created a certain amount of trust and bonding.

Mari’s face popped up through the trap door and she smiled brightly at him, seeing that he was awake. “Bonjour, Jay.”

“Bonjour.” He rubbed his hands over his face and finger combed his wild curls down, making Mari pout.

“Aw, your bedhead was cute.”

“Really? You can see it more often if you want,” he winked and she blushed.

“Come down whenever, you can choose from the bakery’s selection for breakfast. I told Maman and Papa you’re here, so they won’t be surprised.”

“Okay. Thank you so much for your hospitality, Mari.”

“Anytime.”

Something that looked like antennae floating behind Mari’s shoulder caught his eye.

“Uh, Mari? Don’t freak out but I think a giant bug or something is behind you.”

Her eyes went wide. “Tikki!”

The …thing…zoomed around to get in Mari’s face. “What? You were right, he is hot.”

“TIKKI!”

Flattered but majorly confused, he asked, “What…who? Is that?”

“This chaos bringer is Tikki, the ladybug kwami of order, creation, and good luck, shockingly enough. You’re lucky the chaos kwami isn’t here and is busy gnawing on Camembert,” she groaned. “Tikki, Jason. Jason, Tikki, my kwami.”

“You’re…Ladybug?”

“Yep.”

“I guess we can get secret identities out of the way then. I’m Red Hood.”

 Mari tilted her head, critically scanning him. “That makes sense.”

He nodded, not knowing what to say.

Tikki gave Mari a look, and she straightened, coughing. “Right…I’ll…let you get ready, then.”

Her head disappeared and she shut the door, but he could still hear her scolding her kwami for intentionally embarrassing her and the kwami’s giggly defence of “But you’re so cute together! You’re definitely a good match. Plagg agrees.”

Once he was presentable, Jason headed down to the bakery and was introduced to Tom and Sabine, who were quite welcoming, if not protective of their daughter.

Jason had finally found someone who made better baking than Alfred, though he would never tell the man that.

Mari spent the morning showing him her favourite places around Paris, slipping tidbits of history or akuma facts in with her tour.

Jason just smiled and swung their interlocked hands, happy to be with her.

After lunch, Marinette took him up to her room and retrieved a pair of glasses, transforming into Jument. She opened a portal and they stepped into Jason’s safehouse, which he’d given her the coordinates to.

“There you are, home safe and sound! Call me anytime you need an emergency transport.”

“Thank you, Mari. I’ll text you after I update my family, okay?”

She smiled and nodded. “I’ll be waiting!”

Mari headed back towards the portal but paused just before stepping through it. “Maybe we can see each other in person again soon?”

“I’d love to. I’ll make the time, so tell me whenever you want to.”

“Will do!” She stepped through and the portal closed.

Jason sighed and headed to his Bat-communication tech to alert them to his safe arrival home, then headed for the shower.

He chucked his shirt over his shoulder in the direction of the laundry hamper, keeping half an ear out for the soft thump as it joined the pile.

A muffled choke hit his ears instead and he whirled around to see who’d gotten in, half-expecting one of the Bats already.

Instead it was Marinette, who was staring at his naked chest.

He quirked an eyebrow at her and waited for her to speak.

“I want to see you in person. Can you make the time?” She offered him a small grin full of hope, which he returned.

“Absolutely I can; I wasn’t doing anything important anyways- was just about to shower.”

“Bonding activities so soon, hm?” she stalked towards him, not backing down. She hooked her finger in his belt loop and tugged. “Lead the way, Hoodie.”

[a-sterling-rose]

My Valentine’s Day Danny Phantom Ship Rating - I was gonna rate every single ship, but there's too many 🤣

Happy Valentine’s everybody! For this special holiday, I thought it would be fun to rank every ship that is prevalent in the Phandom. To add a personal twist, I’m going to add the rankings for how the couples are by canon and fanon. Do keep in mind that this is my personal opinions and I’m going off of what I’ve seen from these ships. If you have a differing opinion and have fanfictions/fanart that could sway my opinion on a ship, I encourage you to share them with me. This is gonna be a long one, and I’m only going to cover official characters from the show(No crossovers or fan created characters- this includes Wes). Let’s begin!

Amethyst Ocean, Fakeout Makeout, Violet Haze(Danny and Sam)

Canon: 3/10

Fanon: 5.5/10

I’m just gonna rip off this bandage right off. Even as a kid, I didn’t particularly care for this ship. In the show, it just felt like they got together just because they were the main guy and girl characters(sorry Tucker!). From how I saw them, their dynamic is supposed to be Sam is the brain while Danny is the heart: the two being together is what makes each of them complete. However, the show didn’t really capitalize on this, Danny never really challenging Sam whenever she instigated unnecessary conflicts or was just being judgmental. Sam was always right no matter the situation, this being the main reason so many people have conflicting opinions of her(she suffers the most from the show's writing flaws). 

Danny isn’t a saint himself, he has abandoned her and Tucker with ease whenever it gave him the chance for social validation. Canon Danny can be quite sexist actually. He even took advantage of every girl at school when he was the judge for the beauty pageant(Season 2, Episode 14).

They both know they like each other, but neither wants to potentially ruin their friendship. Some say it adds to the drama, I say it adds to my migraine. My AroAce ass can’t put up with this annoyance! Overall, I truly felt nothing when the two got together in the final episode. Beyond everyone around them telling them they like each other and them blushing around each other, do these two have actual chemistry? 

The fanon makes this couple much more tolerable, especially because we actually add nuance to Sam beyond her ‘Goth Vegan Nag’ status. There are some really cute art of the two together that I have saved. However, I think the canon ship has just ruined it for me. I can see why people find them adorable together, but it just isn’t more me.

Brains Over Brawn, Popular Psychology, Strong Smarts(Dash/Jazz)

Canon: 1/10

Fanon: 2/10

In the show, Dash is shown to have a crush on Jazz, something she capitalizes on for Danny to potentially get more social approval(season 1, episode 4). I believe this is the only time Dash’s crush is ever addressed towards Jazz, and I’m glad for it. Jazz is smart enough not to put up with Dash’s bullshit. I’m surprised she didn’t confront Dash more throughout the show about his treatment towards Danny, but Dash is too easy of an antagonist to not use. What would the two even talk about if they did go on a date? Jazz would be so bored being with Dash, he either talking about football or awkwardly trying to reenact a scene in a romance show he totally doesn’t watch. I don’t see it.

For fanon, it’s a bit better since Dash is more nuanced, but the same issue is still present. Dash is just so hostile towards Danny for easy conflict. A well written Jazz would never tolerate that and make it known to the blond. He either changes his attitude, or he can piss off back to Singles Town. From what I’ve seen, people mainly ship them because of how they like the two look together- not compatibility. I feel nothing when I see art of the two together. I haven’t found any fiction that has made me root for them to get together. It just isn’t for me.

Pink Astronaut, Shallow Sapphire, Ghostly Prep(Danny/Paulina)

Canon: 1/10

Fanon: 8/10

Canon Paulina is obsessed with Danny Phantom. Danny Fenton is nothing to her. Paulina has only ever shown Danny interest whenever it suits her and will throw him away once she is done. Canon Paulina is shallow, and there’s nothing else to her. Danny is only attracted to Paulina’s looks, he doesn't care how she acts and how she treats his friends. If these two got together, it would be purely transactional. Funnily enough, it would be Danny to end their relationship once he realizes how obsessive Paulina is towards his ghost half. That or he sees what she really looks like without makeup. Remember, Canon Danny is quite shallow himself. Danny used his judge status to score a date with Paulina(Season 2, Episode 14). He wasn't as much of a simp towards Paulina in season 3, so at least canon knows he wouldn’t tolerate her bratty attitude after everything he’s been through.

When it comes to fanon, now we have something we can work with! The nuances people have added to Paulina in the phandom has made her one of my favorite characters. Some have added so much to Paulina that she is a completely new character. Other’s have addressed her shallowness and gave her a redemption arc. There’s a fanfic that has made me see how these two could work together. Some have her retain a dragon form after the dance event(Season 1, Episode 2). Even when it’s just stories of the two becoming friends, they’re just so cute together. 

Gray Ghost(Danny/Valerie)

Canon: 6/10

Fanon: 9/10

Now this is a drama I can become invested in. Valerie may have been a brat, but she didn’t deserve to have her entire life ripped from underneath her just because of a ghost incident. Seriously, was there really no reason why Danny couldn’t have helped to set things right(like scaring Damon’s Boss, thus making him believe in ghosts)? Nevertheless, the two went on an actual date together(Season 2, Episode 12) and had a good chemistry. The fact Valerie didn’t continue a relationship with Danny for his own safety is beautiful irony at its best. Valerie got an actual character arc and has a hero persona as well. Valerie hates Danny Phantom, but cares for Danny Fenton. A simple conversation could possibly clear things up, but where’s the fun in that? The only thing that keeps me from raising my vote higher is how much Valerie does hate Danny Phantom. The two kinda find a middle ground(Season 1, Episode 18), but of course season 3 makes her forget this and makes her a basic antagonist. They don’t even let her have a conversation with Danny when his identity is revealed in the finale. 

The fanon plays on what the show has given us, but doesn’t fail Valerie like season three did. The fact that fanon just expands on this dynamic instead of having to create things to make these two work shows how beautifully crafted this ship is. 

Dark Gray(Dan/Valerie)

Canon: 0/10

Fanon:1/10

Dan committed mass genocide against humanity and is trying to complete the job. Valerie is doing her best to save what’s left of humanity. There’s nothing here but hate.

Fanon tries to redeem Dan, but it just doesn’t work for me. Genocide is genocide. That shit ain’t cute. The only thing that gives fanon an actual point is that I read a fanfic where Dan sacrifices his very existence to restore his timeline back to normal.

Hunter Silly(Tucker/Valerie)

Canon: 3/10

Fanon: 5/10

Tucker is the one who informed Valerie that the Dog and Kid that destroyed her Dad’s work were ghosts, hence causing her to become a Ghost Hunter. He was shown to have a crush on her before the Cujo incident(Season 1, Episode 11), but Tucker had a crush on anyone who was a girl his age. Anytime Valerie has shown interest in Tucker was to get something out of him: She letting him take her to the dance when Kwan dumped her(Season 1, Episode 2), when Tucker told her about Danny’s parents being ghost hunters(Season 1, Episode 11). It seemed the show tried to set them both together just because they were both black, which I’m glad they stopped once Danny and Valerie were set up as a possible ship. Despite her constant usage of him, Tucker does see the good side of her, hence why he said he wouldn’t give up on her(which was just kinda dropped).

I personally haven’t seen much of the phandom ship these two together that much. I’ve seen some cute art work of the two, but not much fan fiction. I know it’s out there, but I’m not that drawn to the ship that I actively seek it out. Overall just kinda ‘meh’.

Techno Smarts(Tucker/Jazz)

Canon: 3/10

Fanon: 3/10

This is an instance where the Canon and Fanon are tied with this possible ship. Any interest Tucker shows in Jazz in the show is just because she’s a girl. And the Fanon fiction works I’ve seen of the two only have the two together as a means to keep the Phantom Team close together. I don’t feel inclined to seek out works of the ship, but I’m not offended by it either. 

Veggie Burger, Ghost’s Absence(Sam/Tucker)

Canon: 6/10

Fanon: 8/10

This is an instance where the subtext of the canon shows how Tucker may have a crush on Sam. I link you all to this post by @dreamwraith that expands on this more as it made me remember how I shipped these two when I originally watched the show(hence explain why I’m probably not a fan of Danny/Sam even more). They remind me so much of an old married couple already. 

https://at.tumblr.com/a-sam-manson-screencap-a-day/hear-me-out-as-its-something-the-show-worked/axwylxwmv1id

I rank this ship a six simply because of how toxic canon Tucker is, but Sam can be just as toxic back in canon- this is why they work so well together!

Beyond fanart, I personally haven’t read any fanfics for the two, but the art I’ve seen is cute enough to boost the rating up one. 

Jock Goth, Gothic Sports(Kwan/Sam)

Canon: 3/10

Fanon: 4/10

Now this is a ship I personally never made the connection on in canon. Kwan was one of the nice jocks, only really acting up when socially pressured to, but nice when he’s alone. It was out of pity, but Sam hanging out with Kwan was nice of her to do(Season 1, Episode 16), but quickly wanted to get rid of him once he ruined her standing in the goth community. Kwan was having fun with her, but quickly took the chance to be with Star since it meant he could regain some of his popularity status. So in canon, they weren’t the best couple- but not the worst.

I specifically remember reading a fanfic that I really liked about how Kwan realized he developed a crush on Sam, but was too much of a coward to really follow up on his feelings. Sam ended up with Danny in the story, hence making Kwan wallow in his own self-pity for valuing social acceptance more than her. I also remember a fic where Kwan wanted to become legit friends with Sam and the story follows how the two make their friendship work. Not the most popular ship in the Phandom, but one I personally like for friendship. But we aren’t here for friendship, are we?

Twinkle Techno(Tucker/Star)

Canon: 3/10

Fanon: 3/10

Yet another instance of Tucker liking a girl because she is a girl. Star went out with Tucker when ‘Paulina’ was focusing all her attention on Danny(Season 1, Episode 16). She treated Tucker like an errand boy/servant, a fact that he hated enough to be relieved about when Star left him for Kwan. Despite knowing this, Tucker still has a crush on her enough to have dreams about her(Season 3, Episode 9). They would get sick of each other quickly in canon, Star possibly only staying if Tucker had enough money. This relationship would be purely transactional if taken seriously.

I haven’t really seen any fanart or fanfic of this ship, so I’m just going to give it the same ranking as canon.

Sports Satellite(Kwan/Star)

Canon: 7/10

Fanon: 9/10

Once they ditch Sam and Tucker for each other(Season 1, Episode 16), the two remain together for the rest of the show from what I remember. From what we’ve seen, Star is very demanding, wanting basically a man servant as a boyfriend, and I guess Kwan is into it.

I read fanfics adding nuance to their relationship, realizing how toxic their friend group is and just finding solace in each other. Truly they are a cute couple. Shame I haven’t seen any fanart of the two.

Makeup Honor(Dash/Paulina)

Canon: 5/10

Fanon: 6/10

Dash and Paulina seem to only date out of obligation, he being the quarterback while she is cheer captain. They’re with their arms around each other when Danny resets reality(Season 2, Episode 19), but they aren’t really lovey-dovey as you’d expect. They honestly seem more like friends.

Fanon seems to agree with the friendship view like me with their nuance takes on the characters. Whenever they are together, it’s when they are used as antagonists in fanfics. I don’t see this romantic relationship lasting past high school, but they’re fine enough as friends.

Moronic Genius, Brain Cookies, Blue and Orange(Jack/Maddie)

Canon: 9/10

Fanon: 9/10

What is there to say about the Fenton’s? They’re happily married in canon. Maddie has shown she does the occasional romantic gesture, wanting Jack to at least remember their wedding anniversary(Season 1, Episode 8). Despite this mishap, the two seem perfectly happy together. From what I’ve gathered from the subtext, Jack is the one who comes up with the ideas for the inventions while Maddie is who makes them possible. Jack is creative while Maddie is practical. Despite being clueless, the two make a deadly combination.

I honestly believe Fanon overestimates Maddie intelligence. Maddie’s just as oblivious as Jack, she’s just not as loud about it compared to him. You’d think she would have noticed they put the on and off button inside the portal while they were building it. She only read over the prototype portal formulas just as they were about to activate it(Season 2, Episode 16). The Fenton’s are adorable dipshits. That’s what makes them so good together. 

Spurned Affection(Vlad/Maddie)

Canon: 2/10

Fanon: 1/10

Gotta love how canon shows that Vlad would have been awful even if he didn’t get in the portal accident(Season 2, Episode 16). Despite him being against her ghost hunting, Maddie does so in her own secret lab(how did she build it underneath Vlad’s secret lab?). Vlad is very controlling and just uses his accident as an excuse why he’s such an awful person. No, Vlad is an awful person because he chooses to be an awful person.

This is another case of where canon has ruined me ever really liking any rendition of this ship. There are some fics that I read that try to counteract Vlad’s personality by making Jack abusive. Like that’s supposed to make things better somehow? I’m sure there are some works out there that make this ship work, but I have no interest in looking for them myself. 

Family Breakfast, College Triangle(Vlad/Jack/Maddie)

Canon: 4/10

Fanon: 9/10

If canon had the balls to make this a possibility. Well, at least Jack would totally be into the idea. Perhaps Maddie was more upset with Vlad about the log cabin incident(Season 1, Episode 17) because he wanted her to drop Jack, not necessarily because he liked her. The only one holding this ship back is canon Vlad. He’s just too awful.

Fanon has made this ship possible, and it’s the cutest thing imaginable- mainly the bromance of Vlad and Jack. 

Phantom Satellite, Star Gazers(Danny/Star)

Canon: 2/10

Fanon: 5/10

Another shallow canon couple. The two were only really seen romantically together, Star was trying to win favor with Danny for the beauty pageant(Season 2, Episode 14). Any other time Star is seen interacting with Danny is when she’s being mean to him, so there isn’t much else to say about canon.

Another instance of fanon adding nuance to a character, thus making them actually interesting dynamic. The only reason I don’t rank it higher is because Phandom doesn’t seem as interested in this ship, thus being less works to compare to each other unlike Pink Astronaut(Danny/Paulina). I’m not that drawn to it myself to be honest, but what I’ve seen is pretty good.

[phoenixrising0308]

Living with loss

Books: The Royal Romance 1-3 to Royal Heir and cross-over characters from other choices universes.

Rating: M (18+) Sexual situation and adult themes.

Trigger Warnings in this chapter: Miscarriage and infertility.

Pairing: Liam Rys x Jessica Garcia (MC)

Agent Phoenix Forged in Fire Series premise: This is a canon divergent series set after TRR 3 Tariq is never found. Liam’s duty to his country forces him into marriage. Jessica and Liam enter into a Cordonian arrangement. Both of them wanted to have a life together. However, various obstacles prevent him from a divorce and having the life they both want together. With dreams of a future crushed, Jessica leaves Cordonia. Despite a five-year absence, they are still heartbroken and unable to forget each other and the life they once shared. When Jessica’s career path takes an expected turn, her duty to her country pushes her to Cordonia, back into the society that burned her, and back into Liam’s sights. Will she rise from the ashes or once again go down in flames? Catch up here

Disclaimer

A/N: Today is a fanfic writer appreciation day and I wanted to pull something out that I wrote almost two years ago today that remains one of my favorite pieces. I dusted it off and edited it to match the style I now write and it is a part of Jessica and Liam's story and details will be revealed later in a mini also previously published under my old handle called "Build a life"

A/N: this oneshot was first published in August 2019 by this blogger under a previous handle that no longer exist under the title 'Too much baby talk'. It was revamped 2021 under another handle that is no longer in use and renamed 'Living with loss'. It was transitioned to this new active blog on Oct 2022.

No beta readers today... so I will die with my typo's run sentences and tissues.

Chapter Summary: Jessica is overwhelmed when she is out with friends and calls her brother.

Word count: 2,219 *please excuse typos and grammatical errors*

Reading time: 8 Minutes

Song inspiration: Small Bump - Ed Sheeran, Happy - P!nk, and Beam me up - P!nk

Jessica would often be lost in her thoughts. It was hard to focus; every one of her college friends were engaged or married. Some even started their families. She spent five years by Liams side, and they lived an entire life together, but she had nothing to show for it. Just promises they made to each other and promises Liam couldn’t keep. She decided to drown herself in her studies and finish her dissertation, hoping to complete it this term and get her Ph.D. and perhaps at least fulfill her dream to teach at a university it was after all that she wanted for herself before she put her life on pause for Liam and she desperately wanted to get back to that life again. Jessica foolishly thought that she could somehow move forward in life by starting back at one. But she wasn’t the same person, and she realized in the middle of it she would never be that person again.

After making her case for readmission with the Provost to be readmitted after five years, it was decided that the best topic for her paper would be “Criminal Sentencing Trends for Crimes Prosecuted Under the Jurisdiction of Constitutional Monarchy Versus The United States Federal Government - An examination Criminal Justice Systems.” The topic passed the committee approved unanimously. Her time in Cordonia and all the books she read studying with Leo to become a Barrister would come in handy. The paper could write itself all Jessica needed to do a little leg work in the library and write all 500 pages of it. This paper was a moment in between; even if he wasn’t there with her, it was something that connected her to him. If she was honest with herself, she loved him just as much as she did the day she left.

Jessica filled her days between student teaching and a private room in the Lloyd Sealy Library at John Jay College. When all was said and done, she would collapse in her bed and cry herself to sleep, thinking about him and wondering if he was missing her while he rolled around in bed with Madeleine performing his duty to the crown.

After an evening class, she was invited to dinner by her friends Daniel and Thomas. She hadn’t seen them since their wedding, lied about her sudden return, and she avoided going out with them for weeks upon her return, but this time they wouldn’t take no for an answer. She got on the train at Columbus Circle and made her way to Bleecker and Lafayette. She googled the restaurant finding it ironic that it was a Moroccan Restaurant. She plastered a smile and walked over to her friends. After hugs and kisses, Daniel said, “Want a drink?”

Jessica said, “Yeah, that would be great.”

Daniel said, “Okay, so what can we get you?”

Jessica mumbled, “I’ll have a… Scotch neat.” Ordering scotch was like second nature to her, it was Liam’s favorite drink, and it was always at the house. Ordering it was a slip of the tongue. She liked it, but she wanted to do away with all things Liam and quickly changed her mind and said, “Actually, I will take Rum and Coke.”

Daniel said, “So, how’s the Professor?”

Thomas said, “Oh yeah. Jessie, I liked him, and he was all over you. We are so excited when you are guys setting a date? We have never been to Cordonia, so it would be nice.”

Jessica took a deep breath and said, “Ummm, we broke up. I just wasn’t ready for that type of commitment.”

Thomas’s face dropped as he said, “Oh, I’m really sorry to hear that.”

Daniel looked confused, “Jessie, how? When? Why? You told me that you were finally looking to settle down.”

Jessica said, “Oh Danny, these things just happen. I probably just got carried away. Everyone’s getting married or having kids and shit, so I just wanted for a sec, that’s all.”

Daniel said, “Oh, okay…. So, here is our big news; we just wanted to share it with you first our surrogate is pregnant! Her name is April, and she is fantastic.”

Jessica swallowed a lump in her throat and tried her best to put on a brave face and said, “Wow, a baby, how sweet! That’s so great. I’m happy for you.”

Jessica thoughts trailed off to a moment in between with Liam … her first date with Liam.

Jessica said, “But what’s your dream? What’s your heart’s desire?”

Liam said, “More than peace and prosperity for Cordonia?”

Jessica said, “I’m talking to Liam, not the Prince.”

Liam said, “Maybe this is sentimental, but it’s been on my mind lately. Especially given … Well, never mind that. What I really want is to have a family. Maybe not this year or the next, but eventually and not the type that most kings have but one where we’re close and listen to each other. I’ve never mentioned it to anyone before. It’s a pretty mundane dream, now that I say it aloud.”

Jessica said, “Liam, I think it’s sweet.”

Daniel said, “Jessie, Jessie?” and she was snapped out of her memory.

The topic of children was delicate for her. As for many women in the world, the clock was ticking. But for Jessica, it was ticking fast. Having children while she was younger would improve her chances. Jessica wanted children of her own desperately, and there was a real possibility of infertility. It would affect her. Her mother passed away from ovarian cancer when Jessica was fourteen, she was diagnosed with polycystic ovary syndrome when she was sixteen, it meant she would have a hard time conceiving on her own, and she might have to seek out medical interventions, but even if she did, that might not result in pregnancy.

Sacred, it was a deal-breaker with Liam. She told him and he simply said, “Jess, it’s going to be alright. We will cross that bridge when we get to it if it doesn’t happen on its own.” And that night at the maze garden, he put those fears to rest again when he said, “I will get you the best doctors we possibly can from anywhere in the world if we need to if you want to explore having naturally born children with me. I will love you and them just the same. However, they come. You are perfect; they will be too. It will happen. I will try so hard to make it happen for you. We can try right away when we are married if you want to.”

Life took a turn from them and what they didn’t know was when Liam got married they were actually expecting. A gift from a magical moment in the Yu Garden in Shanghai at the Koi pond. They hated the idea of calling the baby “it” and wanted to keep the tradition of not knowing the royal heir sex. Although the baby at that very moment wouldn’t be named an heir nonetheless, it was to them, and they called their baby Koi. But just as soon as their dreams come true, they lost their baby one sunny Sunday morning, never hearing a heartbeat or seeing an image but having just enough time for them to think of a home and how they would decorate a nursery. In all the times they were together after their loss, she never got pregnant again. Jessica started to cry at the dinner table. She wanted so badly to have a piece of her and Liam out in the world, something theirs and living proof that their love could be a living, breathing person.

Daniel said, “Are you okay?”

Jessica hastily wiped her eyes, “Oh no, don’t mind me! These are happy tears! I’m just so happy for you guys.”

Thomas said, “Oh Jessie, I ordered for us. They serve family-style here, so we just ordered Chicken Tagine.”

Jessica said, “I’m so sorry. I’m gonna go to the bathroom and freshen up. I didn’t wear waterproof mascara, and I’m sure I look like a mess right now. I will be right back.” Jessica walked to the restroom and got into a bathroom stall, and completely lost her it for fifteen minutes. She had just been at the restaurant for 30 minutes and found herself lying to her best friend about everything from her break up, to her not wanting a commitment to the real reason she was crying, so Jessica did what any little sister would do called her brother.

“Adam… I can’t take it anymore. Everyone is talking about babies and getting married. It’s just too much baby talk right now for me.”

Adam said, “Jessie, please stop crying; I can barely hear you. Do you need me to get you?”

Jessica’s voice cracked, “Adam, I will never be a mom.”

Adam’s voice softened, “Jessie, don’t say that.”

“Adam, it’s true. I will never be a mom, and I really wanted to. I really wanted that with Liam.”

Adam said, “I know, and we all wanted it for you too. Jessie, you are smart, brave, and you are the kindest person I know.”

Hearing his little sister cry broke his heart, and so he started to cry with her over the phone. “It’s gonna happen for you when the time is right, Jessie, I promise.”

Jessica said, “Adam, can you get me, please. I can’t be here right now. Daniel and Thomas are gonna have a baby; I can’t sit through dinner.”

Adam said, “Where are you, Jessie?”

“510 LaGuardia Pl in the city place is called Le Souk.”

Adam said, “I’m working, but I’m gonna get you, okay? Stay put. Give me a few minutes; I’m gonna put the sirens on.”

Jessica said, “Unmarked.”

Adam said, “Honda Civic Black 2017. Then she heard his radio “This is Detective Garcia. I’m on a 10-63” The dispatcher said, “That’s a 10-4.”

True to his word, her older brother made it to her with sirens sounding in front of the restaurant.

Jessica pulled herself together, walked over to Daniel and Thomas’s table, and said, “I’m so sorry, but I have to go. Something came up.”

Daniel said, “Everything okay, Jessie?”

Jessica said, “Oh, it’s fine, I just can’t stay. We will talk soon, okay.”

Thomas said, “Is that Mateo or Adam in the front?”

Jessica said, “Adam.”

Daniel said, “Tell him we said hi.”

Thomas said, “Jessie, text us when you get home, okay. I hope you feel better.”

Jessica said, “I hope so too.”

As Jessica walked out of the restaurant, Daniel turned to Thomas and said, “She is lying; she is not okay. She loved that guy a lot.”

Thomas said, “It was written on both their faces; I hope they sort it out. But we can’t push. It’s her story to tell, and when she is ready, she will tell us.”

Daniel said, “Well, at least she is talking with Adam. Mateo is hard on her and will interrogate her about why she is crying till she breaks down. At least Adam is calmer.”

Jessica got into her brother’s car.

Jessica said, “I’m defective. It’s probably why he is with her and not me. Who wants someone that can’t give you a kid?”

“Don’t say that word.” He just knew that his little sister needed a hug, so he gave her one and said, “You are not. Maybe you just might need a little help, but you’re not defective. Anyone who is worth it sees you, Jessica. They would see….” Adam swallowed a lump in his throat and said, “That is not the only part of you. There is so much more to you and life than having a baby.”

Jessica said, “I really love him.”

Adam said, “I know. Jessie, I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.”

Adam drove her home that night. She stared mindlessly out the window as the street signs and lights passed her, and all she knew at that moment is that she would need to learn how to live with loss. Loss of Liam, loss of the little life inside of her that never was, loss of her future with him, and loss of the time she spent chasing an impossible dream. Jessica leaned against the window, and her eyes felt heavy, and she fell asleep.

Mateo had already had enough and was ready to board a plane and kill Liam for breaking his sister’s heart, whereas he was mad for Jessica; Adam was heartbroken for her. Seeing her so upset with no solution in sight, he was left with one choice. Help her move on by picking up the pieces of her broken heart and help put her back together. If she couldn’t be brave at that moment, he would be her rock. He would be a safe place for her, a place to let her be her wounded self and not judge her; he already judged her enough for living with a married man for five years. Adam decided Jessica needed a friend, brother, and shoulder to cry on, not someone else telling her she is wasting her life away crying over Liam.

[nervouscloudtheorist]

April 8th 2024

Dear Diary,

I don't know how Tom Nook did it but he built my house around me...while I was sleeping.

Isabelle also stopped by and gave me some wallpaper for my house since Tom Nook didn't paint the walls or finish the floors while he was here. However the most unsettling part of all of this is that Isabelle knew the exact moment I was awake. She didn't stay long so I didn't have any time to ask her what she was doing or how she knew.

Regardless of how she knew I was awake, I still wanted to be a good mayor so rather than immediately going to Tom Nook to ask him “What the heck?!?” I stopped by town hall to see if Isabelle had anything for me to do.

She told me that I was somehow at a 51% approval rate and that if I wanted my rating to go higher I should pick weeds or fish for garbage to try to raise it.

I found this odd because this town barely has any weeds that I could see, at least from my fishing adventures last night, and I didn't see any signs of garbage so I think she is just giving me busy work at this point. I was also a little surprised that my rating was so high despite me doing nothing to raise it. I didn't even know the resident's names which was honestly really embarrassing for me being mayor.

I decided that I just could not be a good mayor that way so I made it a point today to run around town and talk to everyone. And guess what? I succeeded!!

Currently the people who live in Marjoram are me, Isabelle, the shop owners on Main street, Sly, T-bone, Claudia, Chrissy, and Keaton

( who they did NOT make mayor by the way)

Keaton was a bit much for me honestly. When we were talking he kept saying how he was going to be my best friend and I didn't have the heart to tell him that my best friend was Clay.

Which by the way, is not true. Clay doesn't even remember my name. He calls me Thump all the time. So that was pretty disappointing but I guess I've only been here 3 days. I will just have to try harder to be a better friend!

After talking to everyone, I made my way to Tom Nook's Homes to finally talk to Tom about how he just built a house around me while I was sleeping. By the way do you think I should call him Tom or Tom Nook, I don't think he minds either way but I don't know him well enough to call him Tom to his face. lol

Anyways, not only was he NOT apologetic about building a house around me while I slept but I also owe him 39,800 bells for a house the size of my tent. I can't even pay him directly. I have to go to the post office to pay him which is another headache I will get into later.

The only good part about having Tom build your house is that he doesn't charge interest or care when you pay him, as long as you pay him.

He also enrolled me in some “Happy Home” thing that rates how I decorate my house. The whole thing reminds me of the Home Owners Associations in my old town, which was sad.

So back to the post office thing. I guess I have to use the ATM in the post office to pay him but I can't use the savings I have in the bank to directly pay him, I have to first take it out of my bank, put it in my wallet and then re-deposit it to Tom Nook's payment system. It's a weird circle of events I'm not sure I will ever get used to.

I figured since Tom Nook was not helpful I would just wander town Main Street to see if the shops had anything new and to my surprise everything they had was new! When I talked to Tommy at the Nookling Junction he told me that the shops change their inventory everyday to keep things fresh, which is both good and bad news to my wallet. By the way, they are TOTALLY two different shopkeepers that just happen to look the same and they are not related to Tom Nook.

I didn't find anything I wanted in the stores so I walked back to town to talk to Clay some more so that he will definitely realize I am just as cool as he is.

Despite not remembering my name, Clay had no problems asking me to deliver a present to Sly for him. Naturally being the amazing mayor I am, I agreed. I was so excited that Clay asked me to do something for him, I started running towards where I thought Sly would be. In my excitement though, I ended up ruining the wrapping paper for the present before I even found Sly.

I didn't want to disappoint Clay so I got really worried until I remembered that Nookling Junction sold wrapping paper so I bought some and wrapped the present up like nothing happened.

Sly must get a lot of presents from Clay though because he refused to accept that the gift was from Clay. I had to unwrap my hard work and give Sly the gift without the paper before he believed me that the present was from Clay.

Sly was completely unforgiving about the whole situation and told me that he would make me do 10,000 push-ups with Chrissy on my back if I did it again.

I don't like Sly.

I went back and told Clay what happened and thankfully he was much more forgiving than Sly. He even went on to tell me that I could find something called Gyroids on the islands.

If Clay thinks they're cool they must be, so I hope I find one soon!

Ultimately wandering around town today taught me many things. Like did you know that there are presents with balloons just flying around town all day? I don't know how to get them down yet but I am sure that I will figure it out soon!

Also there are pitfall seeds everywhere around town. I suspect that Sly is to blame.

I also learned that Blathers refuses to take any duplicate fossils, which is strange because I thought as a curator he would love to have backups.

They sell for okay money though which is nice because between fossils, bugs, and fish I got my home loan down to 2,000 bells in one day!

I also learned that MEOW coupons just kind of appear in my wallet and when you barter with the people in the RV park they mail you the items instead of just handing them over to you.

Well, I cant say that EVERYONE does that but Pascal the Otter does for sure. I guess I will have to see if anyone visits tomorrow and see if they do the same since Harvey didn't explain the whole barter process.

Anyways, its back to fishing, bug hunting, and weeding for me.

Talk later

-Finn

P.S. Wisp lied. No robot frogs moved in. But I did look around and see that someone named Ribbot is moving into town so I guess I have that going for me.

[clowncollectr]

Arknights - Everything between us, as it should be (Liang Xun / Lee) - Chapter 6

Rating: G

Word Count: 6058 (this chapter), 28397 (whole story)

Summary: It’s Liang Xun’s second time visiting Lungmen. The circumstances are much better compared to last time. There’s no rush. Familiar faces, new faces. More happy memories to join the old ones. Between him and Lee, things are finally as they should be.

AO3 Link

Chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

__________ Chapter 6: Lost and found

“Been awhile since I’ve seen you this troubled.”

The detective’s eyes glanced up. He tried to stare down his opponent, but it felt pretty ineffective when the person’s entire face was covered. He stretched his arms out and yawned.

“It’s nothing. I’m just tired. Aren’t you supposed to be telling me about the mission? Don’t let me distract you.”

“I didn’t stop because I was the one who was distracted.”

Lee made a ‘tsk’ sound to show his dissatisfaction at being caught. This person is really nice to talk to about most things. They catch on fast, meaning he didn’t have to explain much. It meant both of them could cover a large array of topics together in a short span of time. Really useful for doing business. But there were times when they caught on too fast, and unlike most people, they had a tendency to say all of their observations out loud.

In the end, he gave up and scratched the back of his head, both in defeat and annoyance.

“Fine, fine. Doesn’t matter. I did all my homework before coming here anyways, so don’t bother trying to lecture me.”

As if to prove his point, he pulled out a set of files from the inside of his coat and set them on the office desk.

“Calais-Blason, right? That’s where you want to go. You know, it wasn’t easy gathering intel on that troupe of yours without being put on someone’s hit list. I’m afraid I might have to charge you three dinners for this one, Doctor.”

The Doctor reached for the files and skimmed through them, giving a nod of approval.

“It couldn’t be helped. It was a request from the lady herself.”

“The lady…Wait. You mean the cat?! Uh, I’ve had owners commission me to search for their missing pet before, but never the other way around.”

“She works in mysterious ways, alluring as the night itself. Who are we to question her motives? And regardless, Rhodes Island never turns its back on one of its own.”

“Well, nice to know that you’ll look out for those three too if something ever happened.”

“Of course.”

They spent the next hour going over the details of the mission. Although his mind had been a little preoccupied before, Lee was honestly thankful to have something else to focus on, and he discussed the matter seriously to ensure the safety of the other operators.

While he hates to admit it, there was something nice about someone being able to acknowledge his troubles so easily. Because it was so difficult to hide it, there was no reason to put in the effort. The productivity helped with his mood, and by the time they were finished, the tiredness he’d mentioned earlier had somehow dissipated.

Though he thought it’d be best to get more rest anyway. His team would be departing later in the day. So he said farewell to the Doctor and prepared to leave their office to head for the dormitories. The Doctor thanked him for his time but requested one last favor.

“I need you to deliver these files for me.”

Lee took the small stack of files from their hands, looking slightly surprised.

“That’s it?”

It was rare for him to get an errand like this nowadays. Partly his fault since around the start of his contact with Rhodes Island, he used to pretend to have a headache whenever they made him do anything tedious like sort files. Eventually, they just gave up on trying. Okay maybe it was mostly his fault. But he doesn’t actually mind doing stuff like this if he has to.

He waited on the other person for a bit, in case they wanted to elaborate on anything further. The Doctor just shrugged, as much as they could with their hands still in their pockets, and explained that the office number label was on one of the folders.

“You can thank me later.” they told him.

This person has a really unconventional sense of humor.

Usually when you ask someone to do something for you, you’re the one thanking them. But he’s long since grown accustomed to the Doctor’s strange jokes. They were quite the oddball, especially if you caught them shortly after they’d been working too much. Plus there were too many cryptic rumors about them floating around. Like how they wore their usual work attire to the beach or that one time someone saw them eating an originium slug at late hours of the night, when they thought no one was watching. All unconfirmed, none unproven. Scary stuff. There were some things that didn’t need to be investigated.

Since the office for the delivery was opposite to where the dormitories were, the task was a bit inconvenient. It was still a trivial errand in the end. One that shouldn’t set him back more than half an hour.

When he arrived, he found Miss Orchid there with a bored but otherwise neutral expression on her face. He did as he was asked and handed her the files. Lee wasn’t sure what he was delivering, only that when the woman opened the files to read their contents, she gave the longest sigh and muttered “Ugh, seriously?” under her breath. Maybe he’d been tricked into giving another poor soul more work.

Despite her initial reaction, Miss Orchid quickly resumed her professional demeanor. She thanked Lee for the trouble and once the latter had one foot out the door, he heard the faintest complaints about ‘having enough work to deal with’.

Another person that likes to complain about work but always does it in the end? What a troublesome personality. He thought to himself with some amusement.

Since the dormitories were a fair distance away anyway, he took the opportunity to take a pleasant stroll through the landship, walking lazily while he thought about the upcoming mission.

What the Doctor said earlier resurfaced from his memory. Rhodes Island never turns its back on one of its own. Even if searching for someone who went missing was troublesome, it was a nice sentiment. To know that if you disappear, your presence is important enough that people will come looking for you.

Now that he thinks about it, he’s also troubled someone else with this kind of thing. It was…impressive that they never gave up after all that time.

Lee shook his head.

Forget about it for now. We parted on good terms. There’s nothing to regret.

He’s been too gloomy lately, like a child at the end of their summer break. Not wanting his vacation to end. It was a natural reaction, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that he was a little too old to be acting like this. It really would be best if he got over it soon.

He let himself wander a bit more, slowly but surely making his way to the dormitories. While walking down one of Rhodes Island’s many connecting hallways, someone’s loud voice pulled him away from his thoughts. It sounded as if someone had lost their composure. 

“How?! Augh, nevermind. Maybe we should check the reception room first...”

This kind of thing wasn’t uncommon at this place. The landship was home to all kinds of interesting characters. Yes, that part wasn’t all that strange. What was strange was that he recognized that voice. And it was the voice of someone who was supposed to be in charge of his house right now. So why was he hearing it here? It was a couple decades too early for him to be showing signs of old age. Nothing wrong with his hearing yet.

He made sure to keep his presence hidden while he peeked from the corner of the hallway. Sure enough, there they were. Three orange tails and hushed voices. As expected, trouble always came in threes.

He could hear the most reasonable member of their group trying to calm down the other two.

“There’s no sense arguing over who’s at fault. Let’s just think of what we should do before we run into-”

“Before you run into?”

Lee watched as all three of his employees jumped after suddenly hearing his voice. 

Actually, he had planned to wait behind them until they noticed, but he couldn’t resist the dramatic entrance.

The three turned towards him in surprise, and it was Aak who mumbled a not so enthusiastic “Too late I guess” before falling silent along with the others.

Lee looked back at them. At their age, there was no point scolding them. But he knew the next best thing. Crossing his arms, standing there, and looking extremely disappointed. He tapped his foot expectantly, showing that he was waiting for an explanation.

Waai Fu was the first to step forward, and she explained nervously:

“Uncle Lee! You’re still here? We thought you would be on your mission by now. See, we were also called over for a mission and-”

Lee nudged his head to the side, not particularly impressed.

“Bad lie. Too easy to verify that. Next.”

Aak stepped forward and pulled a vial of strange liquid from his pocket.

“I left some important samples here for my new medicine, so I came to get them.”

Lee didn’t seem too convinced.

“Why did the other two come with you? Anyway, we’re on good terms with Penguin Logistics, who also work here. I’m surprised you didn’t go to them first. That’s what you usually do when you forget something.”

Aak shrugged indifferently, too lazy to put together any sort of argument. It felt pretty pointless, considering who he was up against.

Finally, when it was Hung’s turn to speak, the Perro simply said “We wanted to see you off properly. Don’t you think you left too suddenly? Who knows when we’ll see you again.”

The Lung was able to sense some honesty in his words. He closed his eyes and sighed. Probably a bit of the truth mixed in with a lie. He’s seen plenty of those before. Still, the thought was appreciated. Although it didn’t stop him from worrying about the obvious.

“So? What about our guest? No way you left him in Lungmen by himself, right? And bringing him here would be impossible on such short notice given that a background check is required.”

“We didn’t need to. He already went back to the capital. Uncle Liang said he didn’t want his work piling up.” Waai Fu explained.

“That’s good.” Lee nodded, seeming to accept her words. He felt more at ease knowing that everything was in order back home. Despite the way he acted earlier, he didn’t actually mind having the children come to Rhodes Island for, well, whatever reason they were here since they didn’t seem to want to tell him. They were all adults now and should be allowed to come and go wherever they please. It was just more amusing to question them the way he did.

Having settled the important business, he reverted back to his laid back state from before. The plan was originally to go back to the dormitories to rest, but since everyone was here anyway, he proposed the idea of getting lunch together. To his surprise, Waai Fu, Aak, and Hung just stared at him with nervous faces. They didn’t seem to like the idea too much. Very unexpected. These three rarely ever passed on an opportunity to eat. Not to mention, Rhodes Island’s kitchen is quite nice, and he’s already been granted permission to cook there. Even if the menu for today wasn’t good, there was no reason why he couldn’t quickly stir fry something up for them.

In particular, it was written all over Hung’s face that something was wrong. This guy had a bad habit of wearing his heart on his sleeve a little too openly. To the point that it caused trouble for him sometimes. But in situations like this, it made him the easiest person to go to when Lee wanted a straight answer. So he took one step toward the young man and asked him amicably.

“Hung, what’s the matter? Did you guys get into trouble again? Why don’t you tell me what the problem is and we’ll sort it out together.”

It seemed for a long time that Hung didn’t want to say anything, occasionally glancing to the side at Waai Fu and Aak. Lee was about to give up on getting anything out of him when Aak spoke up and caught his attention.

“Can I tell you something?”

“Sure.” Lee responded back.

“Only if you promise not to get mad.”

That phrase wasn’t a good sign, but he didn’t really have any choice but to encourage the other to continue.

“As long as it wasn’t illegal.”

“Ok cool. It was only against regulations. Nothing related to the law.”

“....”

Aak took a deep breath before saying everything in one go, talking at the same barely comprehensible speed as that young woman from the Lungmen Fire Department.

“So the truth is Mr. Liang didn’t go back home he changed his mind last minute because he said he wanted to see you and he seemed kinda desperate so we snuck him onboard and figured it would be fine if he stuck with us but then we lost him and now we can’t find him so he’s wandering around the landship somewhere without a guest badge or any papers and we’re trying to find him before security gets to him first”

There was silence for a while. 

No one said anything. 

It was a lot of information to process.

Once everything had settled in his mind, Lee found that he wasn’t sure how to feel about this situation. All he could do was let out a tired sigh and mentally say goodbye to his free time again.

“I can’t say I didn’t anticipate this scenario when I saw you three were here. Losing him was a surprise though. How do you lose track of a tall, fully grown, adult man exactly?”

“I dunno. It just kinda happened.” Aak replied with a shrug.

Waai Fu didn’t seem very happy with his answer and joined the conversation to elaborate.

“We were leading him around and at some point, we realized he wasn’t with us anymore. We weren’t watching him the whole time. I mean, he’s not a child we need to babysit right? And I really doubt he would wander off on his own so…”

She trailed off and looked down at the floor anxiously, unable to hide the guilt she was feeling at the moment. The situation sounded a lot worse now that she was explaining it out loud.

Lee was quick to notice and reassured her. It was weird that this was happening at all, but not something that was going to end the world either. He knew all three of them were good kids. They probably didn’t want to tell him because they felt bad about causing him trouble. So he wasn’t mad at them, and there was no reason for any of them to feel guilty. Honestly, he was glad they told him rather than trying to solve this problem on their own.

“Hey, don’t sweat it”, Lee gave her a gentle pat on the head. “With the four of us working together, we’ll find him for sure. I’ve only seen one male Kuranta around this part of the landship and that guy has blonde hair. We can just ask around if anyone’s seen a male Kuranta with black hair. Besides, Rhodes Island isn’t a dangerous place and that guy’s plenty capable. 

Worst case scenario, you three will get a scolding for sneaking someone on board. Wait. That probably means me too. Uh, let’s hope it’s Miss Amiya and not Dr. Kal’tsit who does it then.”

Everyone laughed at the thought of the entire group being forced to sit through one of Kal’tsit’s infamous monologues, and the absurdity of it eased their tension a little.

While Hung, Aak, and Waai Fu were perfectly capable of settling things on their own, there was something reassuring about having their boss around to call the shots again. Even if they forgot half the time that that was technically what he was. After some discussion, everyone agreed to split up and cover different parts of the landship.

It was a difficult search since no one personally knew who they were looking for. There was also no way to anticipate where they might find him. But as Lee predicted, there were a fair amount of people who reported having seen him. It took some time, but they were eventually able to narrow things down based on the sightings. And it seemed that luck was on their side today because when they finally found him, Liang Xun was not with security or strangers, but rather, they saw him speaking with some familiar faces.

Familiar to both Liang Xun and Lee’s agency. Operator Kroos and Mr. Nothing appear to have run into their missing guest at some point. It was quite fortunate. Running into those two was probably one of the best possible outcomes. At least they knew who he was and could verify his identity. Lee and the rest of the group were relieved when they saw who he was with. It meant that very likely nothing bad had happened.

Kroos was the first to notice them approaching and she greeted them warmly, sociable and upbeat as ever.

“Oh! Hiii~ Mr. Lee, Waai Fu, Hung, Aak. Wow, so many people. We’re running into all our friends today.”

Mr. Nothing agreed with her. He opened his mouth and was about to say his own greetings when the sound of running footsteps and a flash of black raced past him.

“Lee! You’re still here. I thought I was too late. No one knew where to find you.”

He wanted to reply back with something like ‘Yeah the same goes for you’ , but Lee was more distracted by the fact that Liang Xun was currently looking at him like he’d just found water in the desert. The guy had a pretty mellow personality, and he’s never seen him move with this much urgency before. He wanted to ask him why but wasn’t given the luxury.

Before he could process it, Liang Xun had already grabbed his hands and placed their palms together, filling the space between them. Already, there were some confused and surprised reactions, including the faint sound of Kroos going “oh my” in the background. But Liang Xun ignored it all and focused only on the man in front of him. He stared at him seriously and spoke purposefully.

“About what you said before. I came here because I wanted to talk about it. Your confession. Let me respond to it properly. I-”

“Hold it.” Lee interrupted immediately.

He couldn’t believe what was happening. While he didn’t pull away from the other’s grasp, he looked around apprehensively before chastising him.

“You…you’re not thinking, are you? Look where we are right now.”

Those words were like a loud snap, which pulled Liang Xun out of his tunnel vision. He followed his friend’s advice and checked his surroundings, realizing that there were several people looking at the both of them. Fortunately, there was no one else around except the members of Lee’s agency and Miss Kroos and Mr. Nothing, who were so kind as to accompany him when he admitted that he had gotten separated from his friends. But that was still an audience of five more than the Lung probably wanted.

Liang Xun suddenly let go of Lee’s hands and stepped back. It was far too late now, but he realized from the flustered look on the carp’s face that he had just embarrassed him in front of everyone. He coughed awkwardly and glanced around, trying to think of a way to fix his mistake. But as always, Lee didn’t mind stepping in to help when he was in trouble, and the detective showed his talent for handling difficult situations once again.

Turning to face the entire group, he cleared his throat and explained as casually as he could.

“Sorry everyone. Looks like Liang Xun and I have some private matters to discuss.” He turned towards Kroos and Mr. Nothing and gave them a small nod of acknowledgement. “You two. Could you go tell the Doctor that I’ll be missing the squad meeting for my upcoming mission? We’ve already discussed it together anyway. And if you could, ahem…” He gestured towards himself and the man standing next to him. “Please keep this matter discreet. I’d appreciate it.”

Kroos straightened her back and exclaimed “Yes sir!”, assuming a saluting posture typically reserved for one of Dobberman’s training drills. She had a vague idea of what was going on. Her only real opinion on it was that it was a happy thing, and she needed to buy some congratulatory gifts for it later.

Mr. Nothing, in contrast, was fanning himself nervously. Of course, he also thought it was something to celebrate. But it felt like he’d just learned something he wasn’t supposed to. Considering the influence Mr. Lee and Mr. Liang held in their respective cities, isn’t the thought of their union kind of intimidating? Certainly, he wouldn’t want to be seen as a liability by either of them. So he remarked with earnest supplication that he was a trusted ally. Definitely not a loose end that needed to be taken care of.

“Rest assured, I would rather be shot and left on the streets to die twice over than do something disrespectful to you two, who’ve shown me so much generosity. Your wish is my command.” He bowed his head to show his sincerity.

A little dramatic, but their reactions were essentially affirmative. Good enough for Lee. He had bigger things to worry about right now.

Next, he turned his attention towards the other agency members, who didn’t look quite as surprised as the other two but still had an air of awkwardness around them.

“And you three. Uh, listen. We can talk about this later. If you even want to.”

It seemed that they were all feeling especially cooperative today, since the only reaction he got was a simultaneous thumbs up from all three of them. Great. He had their blessing. Probably.

Once the excitement settled down, the two men said goodbye to everyone and walked away. When they were both out of sight, Lee grabbed Liang Xun’s hand and started walking at an accelerated pace, dragging the other man along behind him. The latter had no complaints and allowed himself to be guided. It’s not the first time something like this has happened. Even if it’s been awhile, he’s gotten quite used to being dragged around by this person. Although by his own admission, this time he had been the one to cause them trouble.

Neither of them spoke at all during their entire walk to the dormitories, and Liang Xun was beginning to worry that Lee may actually be mad at him for what he did earlier. He wouldn’t blame him.

Eventually, they reached their destination, with Lee stopping in front of one of the many dorm rooms and using his ID card to let them both inside. The sound of the door clicking shut could be heard behind them, signaling that now it really was just the two of them. Liang Xun waited for a minute, in case the other person was angry and had any grievances to settle with him. But Lee said nothing.

He only stared at him with a difficult expression on his face.

Liang Xun knew that it was his cue to explain himself. There was no such thing as turning back. Not when he had already caused him this much trouble.

“I thought about it.” he started. His throat felt dry, and he had to concentrate hard to convey what he wanted to express into words.

“I couldn’t understand why I never noticed how you felt. And why I couldn’t decide whether I felt the same. But…”

He reached for Lee’s hands again. Slowly this time. So that they had the option of pulling away if they wished. When they showed no signs of discomfort, he continued.

“I think…I think I have been loved for a very long time. Ever since the start. The things which should have been precious to me became as natural as breathing.” Liang Xun squeezed the fingers that rested on his palms, thinking of unpleasant things, his regrets. Nevertheless, he kept going.

“It’s stupid of me to only realize how much I value something once I’m faced with the possibility of losing it. But I’m awake now. If it’s not too late, I want to spend the rest of my life making up for lost time.”

Frozen in place, Lee could only look at the person in front of him, completely unsure how to respond. Logically, it should have made sense. Why would this person come all the way here otherwise? Just to reject him? They weren't so cruel. Of course this was what they had been planning to say. But to hear such things come out of his mouth, it felt like Lee had completely left the realm of reality. Any second he would definitely wake up now. Just like all the other times.

Liang Xun could see that his words had been received properly, but Lee was having a hard time responding. This situation felt familiar. He recalled the last time they had a proper heart to heart. At that time, Lee had said nothing as well and only moved closer to embrace him.

This time he would be the one to do it. He’d had enough of being passive his whole life.

Without thinking twice, Liang Xun walked forward and leaned in to embrace him. He thought about the last time they said goodbye. About how the carp had been mindful to keep a respectful distance between them, and how much it annoyed him. He decided there would, quite literally, be no room for that possibility this time and pulled the other person in as close as he could. He heard the other person’s breath hitch, clearly started by the sudden intimacy. But he was satisfied to find that Lee only pressed into him further, burying his head into the space between his neck and shoulder.

Now that Liang Xun had time to think about it, these last few days have been incredibly stressful and tiring. His chaotic thoughts made him unable to think clearly, and he found that he could barely focus on anything at all. But it was just that. A couple days. How long has it been for Lee, who didn’t even know whether he was loved back?

On top of all that, everything from his last visit made a lot more sense. Especially that misunderstanding with Ning, which he had originally assumed was Lee’s displeasure at his time not being respected.

He didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. It was all one big terrible joke.

If I were you, I would have hated me by now. Even if I’m considered innocent because I didn’t know, I’ve done nothing but hurt you. How can you still love someone after all that? Maybe I really don’t deserve to hold you like this.

He had such a thought. But the truth was, he’d finally realized something. Earlier, he worried over whether he was the right person. Whether he deserved such an important part in his life. Now he had his answer. Because despite everything. Despite his frustrations, his regrets, his uncertainty, his doubts. He couldn’t stand the thought of another person being in his place right now. So even if he didn’t deserve it, he would selfishly take this position. And he would earn the right to be here just like every other accomplishment in his life.

He doesn’t want to give this person up to anyone, and he certainly doesn’t want him to be alone either. Such a simple conclusion that took him way too long to realize.

It would never compare to the other’s experience, but he finally understood to some degree. Why Lee couldn’t let it go after all these years, despite all the pain it must have caused him. 

Well, there was no point agonizing over the past anymore. Any pain in the future, they could bear it together. Besides, his personal philosophy has never wavered. Words are useful but it’s your actions that will speak for you in the end.

After some thought, he realized that he could start now. So while they were still locked in an embrace, Liang Xun turned his head to plant a slow and deliberate kiss on Lee’s neck. A message, clear and impossible to misunderstand:

I am no longer just your friend.

He felt the man in his arms jolt frantically, and he quickly thought to apologize for being too sudden. Before he could, the other person recovered and tightened their arms around him. From the direction he was facing, Liang Xun noticed a thick and beautiful tail swaying haphazardly. A reaction that was far too honest.

Lee, you are so…

If it were possible, Liang Xun wouldn’t have minded staying like this for a while. But eventually it was Lee who pulled away and cleared his throat to speak, doing his best to regain his composure.

“I never thought I’d be saying this, but…let’s hold off on things for now. I’ll be leaving for my mission in a few hours. It’s, uh, not good to get carried away.”

Liang Xun accepted his words. At the end of the day, they were working adults who have definitely spent too much time messing around. Anyway, the situation is as Miss Hoshiguma had told them earlier. Even if they were apart, it certainly didn’t mean the end. Rather, this was more like the beginning. An embarrassingly late one he felt, but better late than never at all.

Lee admitted with a yawn that he was still tired from traveling and honestly exhausted from the day’s events too. If it had been like before, Liang Xun would have excused himself so that his friend could rest. But he had nowhere else to go. Or maybe it was that he had nowhere he wanted to go. So he sat down and talked with Lee a bit more, while the other changed and got himself situated comfortably in the bed.

As expected, the Lung’s responses soon began to trail off, and he eventually fell asleep. Looking at him now, Liang Xun thinks that this really is just like last time. To be honest, it felt like only a few things had actually changed between them. But a lot more of it made sense now. Like all the small pieces had finally fallen into place, and the distance between them had been crossed for good.

The conclusion to what was already a lifetime’s worth of troubles, although there were certain to be many more. At the very least, he was glad that this person didn’t have to wait anymore. And neither did he, even if he never realized it until now.

__________________

When Lee opened his eyes, he woke up feeling groggy but well rested. He stared at the ceiling for a moment before turning to his side and found that someone had fallen asleep on the chair by the bed. The man had a reserved expression, the same as always, and his only indications of breathing were the light fluctuations of his chest. His posture looked too uncomfortable. The back of his head was unable to rest anywhere and instead leaned awkwardly on the back of the chair. It was impressive that he could even fall asleep in that position.

The impact of the day’s events slowly dawned on him as his mind began to wake up along with his body. He glanced at the clock on the nearby table and found that he no longer had the luxury of staying lost in thought. So silently, he got up and put on his usual coat, hat, and accessories. He grabbed the nearest pen and paper and began to scribble on it. In it, he left a farewell note as well as instructions in case Liang Xun wasn’t able to reunite again with the people who already knew him.

Having a note with his signature on it should get him far enough to get an audience with the Doctor at the very least. They could be trusted to handle the situation. The note was left by the bedside table where it would be easy to find. Before heading out, Lee looked back one last time to examine the man sleeping on the chair. 

He thought about moving him to the bed but decided against it. If Liang Xun woke up in the process, it would just become harder for him to leave, and they probably wouldn’t want to go back to sleep either.

Instead, he just thought about how he would definitely make fun of him again later. This person has the guts to stay in his room and watch him sleep the whole time but apparently not enough courage to actually get inside the bed and sleep comfortably. Stupid. Bad for his back too. He doesn’t know what goes on in that guy’s head sometimes. Whatever. It was more ammo for him to use later.

Even though he was told that the mission was important this time around, the process was more or less the same. Report for the mission. Wait with the squad until preparations are complete. Board the aircraft. Compared to earlier in the day, Lee had no trouble focusing now. So he did his due diligence and took the time to talk to his fellow squad members. He apologized for his absence in the earlier briefing and assured everyone that he wanted to complete the investigation and get home quickly as much as everyone else.

Then, something unexpected happened. Someone giggled at him. He glanced around and discovered that it was the caster operator who always wore a strange hat, the one who went by the codename Haze.

Seeing the confusion on the detective’s face, the sharp-eyed woman clarified.

“It’s only natural to want to come back quickly when you’ve got someone lovely waiting for you back home, isn’t that right?”

She smiled back at him, as if what she said wasn’t particularly out of place.

When Lee heard her words, he only responded with a groan and complained about how he was unable to stop his friends from spreading strange gossip about him. In his defense, this was fairly unexpected behavior coming from Kroos and Mr. Nothing. 

Haze observed his reactions with some pity but was not moved enough to bother hiding the truth.

“Hm? No idea what you’re talking about. The current rumor among the kitties is that you were seen holding someone’s hand while walking through half of Rhodes Island. Shocking for someone who isn’t fond of physical contact. And wasn’t the destination your bedroom? Not hard to put two and two together. Or are you saying several people imagined it?”

So it was his blunder in the end. He was so preoccupied at the time, it never even crossed his mind.

It was difficult to refute Haze's statement, so Lee gave up and chose to remain silent. He only did his best to maintain his composure. Too many people already have seen his embarrassing side today. Of course, some people nearby noticed and were beginning to look at him strange. Fortunately, he was quite familiar with the way gossip worked on Rhodes Island. There were too many people and interesting events going on most of the time.

The current topics would spread like wildfire but the contents were always changing. As long as he kept his head down, sooner or later everyone would lose interest. He could always ask the Doctor to keep an eye on things for him as well. Anyway, compared to the kind of secrets some people on that landship like to keep, being in a relationship with a politician is laughably mundane. Unexpected news just makes for juicy gossip. It’d sort itself out. Probably…hopefully.

Right now, he was fine with the way things were.

[viadama0-0]

my movie ratings ( my taste are questionable)

Suzume - live laugh love suzume 10/10

Waktu maghrib - shouldve learned my lesson from Qodrat im never watching Indonesian horror movies 3/10

Pengabdi setan 1 and 2 - i actually liked this , i watched it bfr waktu maghrib and qodrat. 8/10

Luckiest girl alive - 8/10

Re/member - an 9/10 girl the way it was perfect but there's a slight plot twist that makes zero sense

A good nurse - 10/10 based on a true story

A chalk line - going in expecting nothing but it gave everything 8/10 i would say its decent

The host - 7/10 Hunger - shes a ten. loved everything about it the acting, metaphor, cinematography and the plot love love love

The sadness – 8/10 if you like gory movie go watch it . I love zombie movies but this one is fucking disgusting cause they still can talk like normal humans. And the scene with the one eyed girl in a wheelchair ughhhhhhhh.

Hard candy –8/10 i feel like it could’ve been better if they actually prove what the guy did and there was this one scene where elliot page castrate the guy it was so disturbing. I love elliot page‘s acting i love the way she talks ughh i just love her. The ritual - 8/10 i usually hate horror movie thats based on a cult or ritual but this one was good and fast paced . Plus there was minimal jumpscare which what i really like in a horror movie. AND what i love about this is that the demon or wtv looks real and was fucking scary . like if i saw that while hiking i wouldve shat my pants and literally let it kill me and rather than being chased by it istg. Dungeon and Dragons - shockingly a 9. the humor and the characters i just love it. they didn't unnecessarily squeeze any romance or whatsoever. love the the cgi i think looks real enough for me. the red witch i think sofina was scary af ngl . would i watch it again on purpose probably not. kids and family friendly approved. even if this love disappears from the world tonight - 10/10 fuck i watched this without knowing what I'm getting myself into. it was so good that i wrote this while watching it. It was all happy and shit IN THE BEGINNING. love the change of POV mid movie. Not for the soft-hearted girls. Definitely will recommend this if you wanna watch a tearjerker. Honestly i relate to izumi so much that it physically hurts me to watch this. in another life they got married with twins and adopted 3 cats. Btw at first i didn't wanna watch this cause the fl and ml used to act together in a drama where the were BESTFRIEND like super platonic, their relationship was like siblings. so yk it feels like incest at first.

your name engraved herein - 7/10 watched it cause people said its sad and suprisingly it actually is the ending was cute tho but i feel like it couldve been shorter plus one - 10/10 manifesting a relationship like this please they are sooooooooooooooooooooooooo funny together.

the hangover -10/10 this would be one of my comfort movie if i need a laugh or just to look at dilf bradley cooper

something borrowed - 7.5/10 I FEEL LIKE THE COUPLE IS CUTE but bcs the guy is engaged to her best friend so its wrong okayy tapi idk theres no way to justify it and wtv. but there was a small plot twist and now everyone is happy . plus ive been searching for 2000s romcom for a while now glad i stumbled into this. plus the FL is so cute.

inception - 10/10 watched it bcs of christopher nolan stayed because of Elliot page if i had known he was in it i would have watched it sooner. plus the cast ,top tier istg.

life - 9/10 watched it for ryan reynold and jake gylenhall. it feels weird watching ryan reynold in a serious movie even though he was still acting like himself. the ending thoooooo i was speechless

made of honor - 5/10 when the guy wearing a skirt shpuld have been a red flag not in a fashionable wayits just doesnt suit him. and honestly the male lead should have realized sooner that he likes hannah. btw i bet hes gonna cheat on her given his history.

bullet train - 1000/10 I LOVE THIS MOVIE SO MUCH THAT I WOULD RECCOMEND THIS EVERY MOVIE NIGHT AND SLAP PEOPLE WHO PLAYS WITH THEIR PHONE

you know what imma make another blog just for movies since i love it so much

[lale-txt]

Hi Lale !! I hope you're having a wonderful day !

May I request some Crocodile,Katakuri or Denjiro (you can choose which one inspire you the most !) headcanons with a S/O who writes and draw comics and are overly passionate about it please ?

Thanks for opening your requests and good luck for all the writings ! 💗

hi Aco, my dear! i hope you're having a wonderful day yourself! thank you so much for your request, ahh i loved it (even more because i love your writing & doodles so much). i'm so glad i can finally write something for you, it was about time! i've written for all of them since headcanons come easy to me, hehe. hope you enjoy your favorite men!

🎨 Crocodile, Katakuri & Denjiro with a s/o who is passionate about writing and drawing comics

Crocodile

Crocodile is a busy man, but he still makes time during his day for you

he invites you to sit on his lap at his desk, wrapping your arms around you as you pull out your notebook and flip through the pages

he'd be very interested in your progress, always pointing out little details in your work that he liked and thinking out loud to get your creative juices flowing if you're stuck with an idea

you would get your own space at his desk to keep him company while he is busy doing his Evil Organization Business™ as usual

on his day off he would take you stationery shopping BIG STYLE

his browser search history at this point is things like "best art store on grand line", "art supplies free shipping to hidden headquarters", "best pen and paper for writing", "best books for art references FIVE STAR RATING ONLY"

so yeah, he did find the best art supplies store on the Grand Line just for you and would take you there, keeping it a surprise until you get there

"go wild, y/n. it's all on me." (pulls out his dozen golden credit cards)

he would smirk a bit while he watched you strolling through the store, touching everything, holding things up for an approving nod, testing different pens... you were in heaven and that made him beyond happy

Katakuri

he first noticed your passion for drawing when you started doodling on a napkin as you shared some donuts and cake one afternoon

Katakuri would watch you draw the perfect still life and secretly slips it in his pocket when you play if down as if it was just some random doodle, nothing special

this napkin gets sealed and locked away into a shrine dedicated to you

he is super supportive of your art!

Katakuri isn't the type to be pushy and demand to see your works, but would rather patiently wait until you open up and feel comfortable with inviting him into your creative space

you could just hand him the drafts of your comic and he would lay down on the floor, legs crossed, flipping through the pages, taking in every detail

and just like that he would be even more in love with you and the worlds you created on paper, just silently pulling you into his arms after he finished reading the whole thing and mumbling sweet words of admiration

from this point on he is invested, always happy when you show him something new of your work

he would also offer to be your assistant if you wanted, helping you out where he could so you can fully focus on your art and leave the dirty work to him

once you get published, he would either buy your work from every bookstore on the Grand Line or rearrange their shop window so it's promoting you (no one would dare to object the huge ass man that just bursted in for decorations and left without a single word)

Denjiro

Denjiro is very invested in your art, it caught him the second you showed him your work for the first time

he could spend hours flipping through your notebooks (if you let him), lying on his side with his head resting on one arm, his kimono loosely open, forgetting everything around him as he gets absorbed in your art

he would also offer to model for you in case you need some drawing references (don't let that chance slip...)

would be over the MOON if you draw him something, insisting that you sign it with a personal note on the back for him only

he would frame it and hang it above his bed which is fitting since you're the last thing on his mind anyway before he falls asleep (and we know he falls asleep often)

he also would offer to proofread your work if you wanted that, being overly excited when you announced that you wrote a new chapter

and the utter betrayal on his face when you leave him with a cliffhanger

Denjiro would definitely try and use his charm to draw out some information on the next chapter from you

kissing your neck, his hands wandering over your body, pulling you into his lap... then whispering "what happens next, y/n. i need to know." into your ear

and groaning in frustration when you shut him up with a kiss, but you could still feel him smiling against your lips