#it wasn’t even as nearly fucked then this time all their friends got thanos snapped and we don’t even get canon confirmation that they were

[sunforgrace]

he sat there on the ground and cried. for cas. cas told him he loved him was taken away and he buried his head in his hands and wept

[cjsinkythoughts]

Right From Left

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Word Count: 3085

Warnings: !FATWS SPOILERS!, Cursing, Zemo being a punk, Bucky getting a little scary, some feelings, Sam being his fantastic, amazing, caring for everyone self

A/N: Here it is! At long last! I’ve been waiting for this episode and it was…holy fuck. I barely have words. And I can’t start or else I’ll be ranting for pages. Anyways, I know this Part is a little on the shorter side - not by much, but it still is - and it doesn’t even cover half the episode, but I’ve had a long day and I’m tired, so I’m going to sleep. I wanted to stop before Walker entered the picture too, because then I’m just gonna get more riled up and I’m working later. I’ll probably have another part out today, and then I’ll finish it tomorrow. Unless I can finish it today. I’ll try, but no promises.

Feel free to rant to me about the episode or the show, too, guys! My friends and I have been going back and forth about it for the past few hours. I’d love to hear your thoughts! I think that’s all for now.

As always, this isn’t beta’d so please excuse any mistakes! Thank you for reading, be kind to yourself and others, enjoy this part and stay tuned!

FATWS Masterlist

cjsinkythoughts Masterlist

!SPOILERS BELOW CUT!

You were avoiding him.

When you first got to Latvia, he had pulled you aside, eyes wide and pleading. “Doll, listen-”

“I really don’t think right now is the time to have the discussion we’re about to have.” Shaking your head, you avoided his gaze, your stomach twisting into knots. It was too much for you to handle; you couldn’t focus on the mission at hand and try to unravel the emotions that were making your gut flip like a gymnast. There were too many thoughts in your head, and you needed a clear mind.

“But-”

“Once this is all done, and our lives aren’t in danger. Once we’re back home, then we can talk, okay? Just…please. Not here. Not now.”

And he dropped it. 

It wasn’t that you didn’t want to talk about it. You just couldn’t. You had always been a ‘leave your baggage at the door’ type of person. Don’t mix work with personal. Not like you had much “personal” anyways when you first decided that was how it should be. And then your coworkers became family and your motto got a lot harder to follow. But you still followed it. And you would continue to follow it.

But that made you start avoiding him. Whether you meant to or not, everyone noticed, but no one said anything. Sam shot you a look when you didn’t offer to go with Bucky when he had to check something out. Zemo raised an eyebrow when he came back and, instead of immediately questioning him, you sat still on the couch, eyes glancing up briefly, before going back to playing with the strings of your hoodie.

You were paying attention to their conversation, especially when Karli Morgenthau was brought up, you just didn’t join in. Not even when Zemo mentioned the Avengers, eyeing you to see your reaction.

Honestly, you were tired, physically, mentally, and emotionally. Your shoulder hurt, your brain couldn’t process what the guys were talking about, and your heart couldn’t take any more hits.

It was something you’d been thinking about…you just thought it’d come after this mission.

“She will not stop. She will escalate until you kill her…or she kills you.”

“Maybe you’re wrong Zemo. The Serum never corrupted Steve.”

For the first time since he first walked in, your eyes met Bucky’s. “Touche.” Zemo pointed at Bucky with a pastry around his finger. “But there has never been another Steve Rogers, has there?”

But you couldn’t wait until after this mission. Not when he was so connected to it. “I think I’m gonna go home.” You blurted out before Zemo and Bucky could argue further, Bucky slumping down onto the opposite side of the couch.

The moment the words left your lips, Sam and Bucky shot up, staring at you in disbelief.

“Wait, hold up. What? Now? We’re so close-”

“Why? Is it your arm? Is it hurting? You should’ve told us-”

“I’m just tired.” You cut in, shaking your head. “That’s all. I didn’t expect this to be drawn out this long when you called, Sammy.”

Bucky’s hand twitched as he hesitatingly scooted closer to you. “Doll, if this is because what happened on the jet-”

“It’s not, Buck.” You tried to give him a convincing smile, but you knew by the look in his eyes that he didn’t buy it for one second. You reached over to squeeze his hand, and when you pulled back, he held on tighter, a sigh escaping his lips as he stared down at your linked hands.

“Okay…if you wanna go home, we can get you home. Just…” His head turned back to you, a pleading pout on his features. “Just…stay. Another day. Please. You can keep avoiding me, I won’t even say another word to you if you don’t want. But stay. Just for one more day.”

Chewing on your cheek, you finally nodded slightly. “Okay. One more day.”

His eyes lit up, before his face fell again when you took your hand back and curled into the corner of the couch. “Let’s talk shop, boys.”

“Okay. So, from my understanding, Donya is like a pillar of the community, right?” Sam easily changed the topic back to the situation at hand, giving you a reassuring wink when you smiled at him gratefully. “So when I was a kid, my Tee Tee passed away.”

Bucky screwed his face up in confusion, straightening his head from where he had it leaned back. “Your - your Tee Tee?”

Sam gave him a look. “Yeah. My-my Tee Tee, yeah.”

Bucky looked at him weirdly. “Who is your Tee Tee?”

The exchange made you giggle a little bit, shaking your head. “Bucky’s a city boy from the 40’s, remember, Sammy?”

“Fine.” Sam rolled his eyes. “When I was a kid my aunt passed away.”

Bucky gave a slight huff, making you chuckle again. You stopped when he smiled over at you, but your grin didn’t leave your face. Even when they were the ones to give you a headache, your fellas were damn entertaining, that’s for sure.

With a sort-of plan in place - the gathering for Donya being no more than a theory, but the only idea you really had - you stretched out from your spot on the couch, twisting to crack your back. “Zemo.” The man stopped his rummaging through the cabinets and looked over his shoulder at you, an eyebrow raised. “Go put some clothes on. We’ve got work to do.”

He gave you an unimpressed look, opening his mouth, but Sam beat him to the punch. “Do as the lady says, man. You’re already walking on a tightrope after you shot Nagel!” Zemo waved dismissively at Sam’s exclamation, heading into a separate room to change out of his robe. “That guy is gonna drive me up the wall.”

“Don’t let him get to that pretty head of yours, Sammy.” You hummed, standing up, wincing slightly as you stretched your sore shoulder over your head.

You could tell Bucky wanted to say something, the way he snapped forwards, hands moving down his thigh like he was leaning over to reach for you, his eyes locked on your injured joint, but, just as he said earlier, he didn’t say a word. But the part that made you upset was…you didn’t stop him. You didn’t tell him it was okay for him to talk to you. You didn’t reassure him that you weren’t purposely trying to avoid him. You simply moved over to the kitchen to get something to drink.

It hurt worse than your shoulder, but you couldn’t handle it. Not then. Not with such an important part of the mission coming up. So you didn’t say anything. You just sipped your water, switching into tactic mode as your mind ran through the scenarios of what could possibly go down in the next 24 hours before you went home.

*************************

Walking under the arch, you couldn’t help but feel saddened as Zemo told you about what the courtyard used to look like. Thanos messed the world up so much more than you realized and, as much as you hated to admit it, the Avengers did have a part in it. Not that they - you - were in the wrong, necessarily. You truly believed you did what anyone in that situation, with the skills and abilities and knowledge the team had, would do what you did. Or tried to do.

“I’m gonna take a look around upstairs.” Sam stated, looking up at the upper stories of the building, before glancing at Bucky. “See what you can find out here. And keep an eye on him.”

“I’ll come with you.” You said, turning on your heel to follow Sam. The back of Bucky’s gloved hand brushed against yours, and instinctually you turned your palm to link your fingers and squeezing. You let go quickly once you realized what you were doing, nearly tripping up the stairs to get to Sam, not daring to wait for Bucky’s reaction.

“You’re an idiot.” He stated simply as soon as you met him at the top of the stairs.

“Can we focus on finding Donya right now, please?” You grumbled, moving forwards cautiously, peeking around the corner. You frowned when you saw two guys at the end of the hallway, looking back at you and Sam warily.

“You need to hear what he has to say, cher.”

You sighed, rubbing your forehead. “I know I do. I know. But I can’t. Not right now. I’m just trying to get this over with first. I don’t want too many things on my plate. I might choke.” It already felt like you were drowning most nights.

He paused at your words, giving you a once over, before nodding. “Okay. I can respect that.”

“Thank you.” You told him earnestly. “Now let’s try to get something from these people.”

He nodded in agreement and you two continued forwards with your search. Room after room, people walked out before you could get anything from them, locking doors behind them. The Flag Smashers logo was everywhere, but you expected nothing less from a refugee camp that practically worshipped what they were doing.

Even when you did get a guy to talk to you, he immediately shut you down, leaving you and Sam dejected. The fact that the world had gotten so bad that these people couldn’t trust you and Sam - Avengers; people who used to be heroes and bring hope to others - it made your heart sink.

“C’mon, Y/N.”

“Are we wrong?”

He froze at your question, his lips pressing together. “About what, exactly?”

You shrugged. “I don’t know. I just…I guess I can’t tell right from left anymore. I always assumed that the Avengers were the good guys. That the actions we’ve taken in the past were us making the world a better place, but…Sokovia and Ultron. Germany and the whole civil war thing we had going on. The entire world and Thanos. We don’t truly ever win. Do we?”

“I can’t answer that for you.” Sam shook his head. “I can’t tell you what to believe or who to believe in. But I can tell you that we’ve made a difference. Steve, Nat, Tony…they made a difference.”

“But was it a good difference? Was it a change? There’s a difference between changing the world and just making it different, Sam.”

He blinked at you, nodding slowly. “Yeah. I guess you’re right. And I don’t have that answer for you either. But they tried. They did what they thought was right. No matter if it was or not. And isn’t that all we can do? Try?”

His words made you think back to the conversation you had with Bucky once he learned about John Walker, which seemed so long ago. When you told him it wasn’t Sam’s fault. That he was just trying. That he did what he thought was right. 

And maybe he was wrong. But he made a decision. It was his decision. To do the right thing. And right then, not for the first time, you could see exactly what Steve saw in the man in front of you.

“You’re a good man, Sam.”

Sam grinned, slinging an arm around your shoulders and squeezing. “And you’re an incredible person, Y/N. Let’s go see if Bucky and the Baron got anything.”

You snickered at his mocking tone towards Zemo and nodded. “Yeah. Okay.”

*****************************

You didn’t like it. You didn’t like it one bit. So far, Zemo kept proving you wrong. Even when it seemed like he was about to jump ship, he came back. No matter how many opportunities he had to escape, he never did. And it was making you even more suspicious.

You stayed out of Bucky and Sam’s conversation, although you had to agree with Sam’s point, especially with the conversation you just had.

Your thoughts were running a thousand miles a minute, only to be interrupted by Zemo information about the funeral this afternoon. Guess a snake will always be a snake.

“And you, uh, didn’t think this was important information?” You questioned, eyes narrowed and brow pinched.

He shrugged. “You have it now, don’t you, princess?”

Bucky growled at the nickname, leaning back on the couch, threatening Zemo with the Dora Milaje.

You can’t remember a time you’ve ever been scared of Bucky. Maybe a little threatened and intimidated by the Winter Soldier, but never scared of Bucky. And when he stood up after Zemo mentioned leverage, you didn’t expect anything from it; maybe another choke hold or something. So the glass hitting the wall, the clench in his jaw as he spoke gruffly to the Baron, for a mere second, he kind of frightened you. Maybe it was all the emotions you’d been through the past few weeks or maybe it was the adrenaline that seemed to be pulsing through your veins 24/7 nowadays. Whatever it was, it made you flinch, bolting up as Sam did.

You left the room quickly, hearing Sam say something about making a call, hoping to calm your racing heart.

“Doll?” You sat up from the bed you were laying on, legs hanging off the edge. Bucky stood in the doorway, nervously shifting his feet. “I know I said I’d leave you alone, but…”

You gave the bed a pat next to you and he gladly accepted the invitation, padding over to sit besides you. “I don’t want you to leave me alone, Buck. You’re my best friend. I-I just need to take it one thing at a time right now.”

He nodded. “I get it. I wasn’t…I wasn’t coming in to talk to you about that. You said we’ll talk about it later, so we’ll talk about it later.”

“I appreciate that, Bucky.” You smiled at him, before frowning. “What did you wanna talk about then? Are you okay?”

“Did I…did I scare you?”

You blinked at his question, tilting your head. “What?”

Jerking his head to the doorway he explained, “just then. With Zemo. Your heart spiked.”

“No.” You answered immediately. You would never ever admit that he kind of did scare you. It was just for a second and you knew how his brain worked; he’d beat himself up over it, go over his actions for hours instead of getting the rest he so desperately needs and deserves. He didn’t need that on his conscience right now. “I wasn’t - I just…you startled me. I wasn’t expecting that reaction-”

“I didn’t like the way he talked to you.” He spat out, glaring at his hands in his lap. “And then the smug bastard thought he was gonna get away with holding back information like that and I just…I dunno.”

His hand came off his thigh, but he hesitated. Before he could put it down again, you slipped your hand under his, linking your fingers, running your thumb in circles against his palm. “Don’t let him get to you, Buck. Don’t give him the satisfaction.”

A sigh left his lips and he nodded. “I know, I know. It’s just…hard. After everything he put me through - put us through - I…I just hate that he’s really our only option.”

You frowned, shifting on the bed to face him, one leg bending beneath you while the other still hung over. “Why are you so obsessed with catching these guys?”

“I wanna do something right.” He murmured, playing with your fingers. “I’ve done so much wrong…I just wanna do something right. And I feel...responsible for it, I guess. In a way. It’s Super Soldier Serum. I thought I was the only one after Steve…” He froze at the blonde’s mention, giving you a side-eyed glance. You nudged him, silently telling him to continue, that it was okay to talk about him. “And Sam’s right, you know. She’s just a kid. So…I dunno. I wanna help. I wanna do something right. And catching them would help. It’s right. Right?”

You nodded firmly. “I understand where they’re coming from. Karli’s just trying to help the world. But she’s doing it wrong. And that I know for absolute certainty. Which is good, I guess. I was talking to Sam early and I mentioned not knowing my right from my left recently. It’s good I know something, huh? And for you it should be easy telling your right from your left.” You joked, tracing the gold lines on his metal arm. “I guess you’re just gonna have to stay besides me to help me remember.”

Looking up, you found Bucky staring at you with something you recognized in his eyes, but didn’t want to name. “Three hours, forty two minutes and thirty one seconds.”

“What?”

“That’s how long I didn’t talk to you. It was too long.”

You sighed, ducking your head. “Bucky, I’m sorry-”

“I’m sorry. For anything and everything I’ve ever done wrong. I won’t mention the plane or anything we’ve talked about until you bring it up first. I promise. Just…just don’t ignore me anymore? I'm not sure I can handle it for much longer.”

You nodded, watching your fingertips dance along his scruffy jaw. “I won’t.” He caught your wrist, opening his mouth, before shaking his head and closing it. “What?”

He shook his head again. “Not until you bring it up.”

“We will talk, James. I promise.”

“You don’t have to explain. I get it. I really do. It’s okay. As long as we’re okay for right now, I can hold it in a bit longer.”

You nearly asked him what he was holding in, but you quickly shoved the question out of your mind, knowing it would take you down a conversation you couldn’t possibly have right then. “How long do you think we have?”

He shrugged. “I dunno. Zemo just said that it’s this afternoon. Why?”

“I started reading The Great Gatsby on the plane. I’ve got it on my phone. It kinda reminds me of you. Do you-do you think we have time to read some? Only if you want, I mean. Like we used to do in Wakanda?”

He grinned and nodded, scooting up on the bed and flopping down into the pillows. You smiled back, following his lead. Once you were comfortable, your phone out with the chapter you were on, Bucky scooted closer, laying his head on your stomach, hugging your waist. 

“Is this okay?”

Your fingers found home in his hair and you nodded when he looked up at you for an answer. “Yeah. It’s perfect, Buckaroo.”

[shades-of-stony]

Time Travel Stony Fanfic

Character from the Future travels to the Past 

A Shadow Hanging Over Our Fate by CaptainDean13

Summary: The Avengers get sent back in time to WWII where they run into the Howling Commandos... complete with Bucky and Steve. Little hard to explain that away, especially when you are trying to keep some major secrets. Secrets like how you ended up in the future and why the hell Bucky is now a scary (reformed) assassin with a metal arm, not to mention that you married your friend's son.

Note: A 1000/10 READ. THIS IS SO FREAKIN’ GOOD THAT I READ IT 3 TIMES SINCE I FIRST FOUND IT LAST YEAR. It’s a nice and well written time travel fic with the howling commandos and past Steve and Bucky!!

A New Way For Us by ann2who

Summary: They fight Thanos—and they’re losing. And before Tony knows what’s happening, he’s standing with Doctor Strange in front of the Eye of Agamotto and gets send back in time. Can he find a way to fix things this time around, or are they doomed to fall apart all over again?

Note: This is where Tony went back in time to fix everything that went wrong and prepare for the arrival of Thanos! Due to an unexpected twist of fate, he found himself getting closer to Steve of all people!  

Two More Miracles (To Be A Saint) by queenpenthesilea

Summary: “Get up, Stark, you sleep too much. You said you would teach me paper football.”

Tony’s eyes snapped open. No. No. Had it all been a dream? Had he just imagined five years – five years - of an idyllic life, complete with a beautiful, wonderful daughter? He pushed himself up, looking around; he was on the Milano – he was on the fucking Milano, and either this was a really weird version of hell or everything had been a dream. Or, a little voice whispered, something had gone horribly, horribly wrong with the infinity stones.

Note: A nice and juicy post-Endgame Time Travel fanfic!! Though, this one held a few what ifs. 

Saving the World is a 12 Step Program by janonny

Summary: Tony and Steve fall to pieces when Thanos’ wins.

Then they pick themselves up, and find a solution. They also find something infinitely more precious in the process.

-

“It’s going to sound pretty outrageous,” Tony admitted, rubbing a hand over his brow. While he had put on some weight and wasn’t as gaunt anymore, he was still easily tired nowadays.

“More outrageous than talking racoons and a purple villain traveling through space to collect magic stones?” Steve asked drily.

Note: This is another post-Endgame fanfic but with a twist and different take on the whole time travel!

Oh, Snap by wedelia

Summary: Peter wakes up, and he’s simultaneously five years too early and right on time.

Or, Post-Endgame Peter goes back in time and accidentally-on-purpose gets Steve and Tony together before the initial snap happens. And, oh, yeah—he also recruits a former-Air-Force-pilot-turned-galactic-hero, has lunch with Black Widow, and somehow befriends Nick Fury. This changes things.

Note: It’s Peter who time travels this time around!!

If We Never Got This Second Chance by Pookaseraph

Summary: When Tony and Steve’s son from the future, Jake Jensen, arrives at Avenger’s Tower, the two of them are forced to confront some hard truths: Tony that he might not actually become a horrible father, and Steve that he might not be able to set aside his discomfort with sharing a child with another man. When they both get a second chance at a first try at fatherhood, it’s up to the two of them to learn from their own future's past.

Note: Anyone up for some future son time travel? Enjoy this nicely written fanfic of Stony’s future son traveling and meeting the past versions of his parents! Past versions that are not even together yet! Things are about to get weird for Steve and Tony. 

Your Name on Every Wall by Sineala

Summary: The Time Gem throws Steve into the past rather than the future, and in doing so, it gives him the opportunity to undo his past mistakes. But when it turns out that all of his mistakes involve Tony Stark, Steve begins to wonder if he's ever going to be able to mend things between them.

Note: A unique plot where Steve travels to the future and realizes what he is missing on!

Together, At Dawn by RoseGoldAmpersand

Summary: Steve returns the Infinity Stones to New York and finds himself in conversation with Tony of the past. More mature and willing to listen to Tony he realises that what he previously thought were taunts was actually Tony flirting with him.

In light of this new discovery and alone in Tony’s workshop after the battle of New York, one thing leads to another...

Note: ohhhhh, some juicy smut anyone?

  Don't Look Back, You Can Never Look Back. by iL0Vsuperman

Summary: Tony Stark: billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, and, now, superhero.

It’d only been a few months prior that he’d revealed to the world he was Iron Man and life couldn’t be better.

That is…until he stumbled upon an old abandoned Hydra lab and kinda set off one of their machines by accident. A blast of blue light later and he found himself in the same lab…only it is seventy years earlier and it is full of Hydra agents.

Cue the entrance of the Howling Commandos led by Tony’s childhood hero, Captain America.

Suddenly, Tony is living out a dream. He’s joining up with the Commandos in the search to get Tony back to his right era. It’s the adventure of a lifetime and, at first, it’s amazing…but then he and Steve connect in ways more than just friendship and he finds that he is torn between wanting to stay with him or go back home.

In the end, whatever the result, he loses.

Note: Tony meets his childhood heroes-the Howling Commandos and Captain America! 

The Future is Yet in Your Power by FestiveFerret

Summary: "Now." Wong leaned back in his chair. "What would you do to save this world from Thanos' attack? What would you sacrifice?"

"Anything," Steve said. "Anything at all."

Wong considered him for a moment, expression unreadable. "There's one thing, maybe."

Note: This is nice fanfic about Steve putting everything on the line to hopefully make a change. 

The Good or Bad Thing by petreparkour for SeetheSea

summary: “It’s the metal suit,” Thor informed Steve, his normally-booming voice tinny over the SHIELD comms. “What did Stark call it—Iron Man?”

“But he’s down here,” Steve protested as the Hulk roared in Stark’s face, startling him into waking with a shout. “How could—”“It’s damaged,” Thor reported. “But it looks different. More advanced. And he—ah. He’s carrying you, Captain.”

“Please tell me nobody kissed me,” Stark breathed out, and then Stark’s voice suddenly came over the comms, but the man lying next to him hadn’t moved.“

Guys, come on, you’re killing me here. What is it, 2012? God, I hate time travel. First, I'm fighting Thanos. Now, I have to deal with my past self and Thor's bad haircut? Oh my God, Cap, yes I hacked their comms, they’re my comms.”

Steve nearly opened his mouth to protest that he hadn’t said anything when he realized that this replica of Tony Stark wasn’t speaking to him.

Note: Future Tony and Steve accidentally traveling in the past!

  Character from the Past travels to the Future

hold the things you wanna say by SailorChibi

Summary: Tony is still a consultant, and between SI, the team and SHIELD he's overworked and exhausted. That's okay.

He and Steve have been having sex for weeks but that's all it is, just sex, and Tony wants more but he'll never get it and that's okay. Really.

What's not okay is the fact that Howard Stark has somehow appeared in the future and is the same as always.

This is definitely going to fuck up his schedule.

Note: ANGST! READY YOUR TISSUES.

Twice Upon a Time by TsaritsaElena

Summary: Tony Stark has never had an easy relationship with his father, but when Howard Stark circa 1983 time travels to the future in a freak accident, things get even more complicated, especially since Tony is dating his dad’s idol, Captain America, and Howard doesn’t know. As they work toward a solution that will restore Howard to his own timeline, will Tony get a second chance at a father-son relationship with his dad, or is he in for more of the same unforgiving treatment from Howard? Time travel, Avengers missions, and a secret project of Howard’s: things at Stark Tower are about to get a little crazy.

Note: SOME MORE ANGST AND HOWARD TRAVELLING TO THE FUTURE. 

The Future Is Ours (Whether We Want It Or Not) by ann2who

Summary: After a hit from the Time Stone, Steve switches places with his future self.

Note: Another of Steve traveling to the future! Though this time, it features both timeline! Both POV of the past and future! 

Ordinary Men by RiaRose

Summary: "Aren't you at all happy to see me?" Howard shot back, holding his glass out and pointing with his index finger. At Steve's stony face, he dropped his arm. "Want a glass?" he tried, picking up an empty tumbler, "This is good stuff."

"Tony doesn't skimp on - well - anything. And no, thank you."

"Was that Tony?" he queried, gesturing toward the hallway the other man had disappeared down. Steve nodded but didn't give any more information, so Howard repeated his earlier question, "Aren't you happy to see me?"

It took Steve a moment to answer. Howard could see his jaw working. 

"No, not anymore."

OR

In which Howard travels to the future and just messes up everybody's day, Steve is conflicted, and Tony is a piping hot mess, as per usual. It's not going to be easy, but Steve and Tony have to somehow navigate through Howard's arrival and the strain it puts on their relationship.

Note: From the summary alone, you can tell that THIS WILL BE ANGSTY. 

To Have My Time Again... by WilmaKins

Summary: It's been two years since Siberia, and Tony Stark is still dealing with the fallout - personal and political. Life is quite complicated enough, without Bruce falling through a wizards roof yelling that Thanos is coming.

Thor and Loki are stalling, but time is running out. The fate of the universe is at stake. Steve Rogers is back in the picture. Really, the last thing Tony needs is for their plan to go horribly wrong and bring Howard Stark forward in time.

But his Dad *is* standing in his office, whether he likes it or not.

So, it looks like Tony will have to fix that mess too.

Note: There is just something about Howard-travels-to-the-future fanfics. 

Howard Stark Meets The Avengers by SerlinaBlack

Summary: Howard Stark unknowingly travels to the future with his son and wife. Luckily the heroes of the future were somewhat ready for it. Unluckily , they don't seem to like him very much

Alternative summery: when will Howard learn? Not now lmao.

Note: ANOTHER ONE.

[x-ladyathena-x]

Who We Were

(also on my AO3 & Wattpad under the name: Grey_Eyed_Athena)

Warnings: Smut, like dirty smut. Don’t read if you’re under 18. Angst, some fluff, enemies to lovers

Bucky x Reader

Word count: 2460

Summary: (one shot) You're an employee at Captain America's family fishing business. When a handsome stranger with a metal arm appears out of the blue, tensions rise.

You were a mutant working for Captain America’s family fishing business. It was a slow day today in the marina store, you hadn’t had a customer in hours. So, you sat with your feet propped up on the counter, reading from an old magazine with crinkled pages.

“Ahem,” a deep voice cleared their throat to get your attention.

You peered over the top of your magazine slightly annoyed.

“I’m looking for Sam Wilson.”

The man was tall, with short dark hair, and tragedy etched into every line of his beautiful face. The type of look people get when they’ve seen horrible things that they’ll never truly be free of.

He looked familiar but you couldn’t quite place him until you noticed his arm. At first, you thought it was a dark compression sleeve, but now you realized that this was the Winter Soldier you were talking to.

You called Sam on the phone, “Hey, Boss, there’s an Avenger here to see you.”

Sam groaned on the other end of the phone, “Which one?”

You didn’t know if it would be rude to call the man in front of you Winter Soldier to his face. That was the name Hydra gave him.

“The quiet one with the metal arm.”

Sam groaned again, “Bring him down.”

You hung up the phone and turned back to the man, “Follow me.”

The two of you walked past the register and into the back hallway. At the end of the hall, you both squeezed into a small service elevator that led to the lower levels. Sam liked to keep his office out of plain sight.

Inside the elevator, the two of you were nearly touching shoulders. It was a little awkward, so you decided to make small talk.

“How did you lose your arm?”

In truth, you didn’t know. You knew exactly who this man was but nothing much about him. You knew he’d renounced Hydra, joined the Avengers and fought Thanos. Everything that could be read in the media.

You, yourself, were one of the lucky?—or unlucky few who were not snapped and left to wander the earth in confusion and fear.

He ignored your question.

The elevator dinged open and the two of you stepped out.

“It’s pretty, your arm. The black and gold.”

He didn’t say anything, just glanced at you.

“What brings you here Mr. Barnes?”

“Bucky,” he corrected you.

“Oh, that’s right. Sorry. That’s what Captain America called you, right? That’s what Steve Rod—”

He slammed you up against the wall, holding you by the neck with his metal arm, “Do not ever mention that name to me.”

At first, you were scared, shocked even, but then you got mad. You slipped your foot behind his heel and knock him off balance. He wasn’t expecting it.

He fell flat on his back and you crouched over him with a fist full of his shirt, and got down in his face, nose to nose, “You ever do that again and we’re gonna have a problem, okay?”

He nodded with resignation.

You patted him roughly on the cheek, “Good, now come on,” You got up off him and began walking away, “The boss’s office is right up here.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The woman was strong, he’d give her that. He supposed that he should feel bad that he grabbed her like that, but when she said Steve’s name, he just—he couldn’t think about him right now. Thinking about his old friend made him go to a dark place. He couldn’t blame Steve for what he did, where he went. After an entire lifetime of being the most selfless, self-sacrificing human alive, he deserved to make a selfish decision for himself. It still hurt though. The only person that ever loved him for who he was—was gone. And hearing his best friend’s name come out of the mouth of someone like her? Well, what did she know? She didn’t deserve to speak his name.

She showed him Sam’s office and turned to leave without another word. Bucky watched her walk away as he stood at Sam’s office door. Despite himself, he couldn’t help but admire her (your body type) body as she walked away.

“You’re drooling, Buck.”

Bucky snapped out of his daze to see Sam Wilson smirking at him from inside the office. His red, white, and blue vibranium shield displayed proudly on the wall.

“Good to see you, Cap,” Bucky smiled.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You sat back in your chair up front. It was a quiet day, the off season. Not many people coming in to buy bait and tackle. As you tried to go back to reading your magazine, your fingers trailed over the place on your neck the Winter Soldier’s fingers had wrapped around.

You say Winter Soldier, because the eyes that were looking back at you as he had you pinned against the wall were not those of Bucky Barnes.

A shiver ran over you and you couldn’t help but press your legs together.

You thought about the cold metal. The whirring noise the plates made as they locked into place. The scent coming off him—he smelled like a cold winter’s night. Like pine and wood smoke.

You shook your head. Get a grip y/n. You still stood by what you told him down there. If he got aggressive with you again, the two of you would have a problem.

Maybe you wanted a problem.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So, what brings you here, Buck?” Sam asked the man seated across from him.

“Mutants,” Bucky said gravely, “Hydra sleeper cells that still believe in the cause, lying in wait. I was just in Prague last week and got attacked by two of them. At first, I thought super soldiers, but no, they had abilities.”

Sam sighed, “Well, you’re not gonna like what I’m about to tell you, then.”

Sam launched into the story of how he was in Europe a month ago, helping investigate odd claims. That’s when he learned of the mutants. While there were many that operated as Bucky described, the majority were refugees, seeking asylum from those that would use them for their powers. Not unlike their friend Wanda and what Hydra did to her.

“That’s when I met y/n.” Sam said.

Bucky’s blood ran cold at the thought of the woman upstairs, “How do you know she’s not a sleeper?”

“Because I trust her,” Sam told him, “There’s still good in people in the world, Buck. Even if you don’t see it.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were dreaming tonight. Dreaming of the man with the metal arm. The Winter Soldier. Bucky. Dreaming of the way he smelled. Dreaming of his weight on top of you—wait.

You awoke with a jolt to find Bucky Barnes, the Winter Soldier pinning you down into your mattress with a knife against your throat.

In your panic, you moved with strength not previously explored. Your hand wrapped around his wrist, pulling the knife away from your neck. Your legs wrapped around his waist as you used the leverage to flip him over.

He was a large man. Burly and heavily muscled with broad shoulders, thick arms, and even thicker thighs. But your mutant strength, along with your adrenaline-fueled panic allowed you to flip him with ease.

You now sat atop him, straddling his waist. The knife in your hand, holding it to his throat.

He looked shocked. There was also something else in his eyes you couldn’t quite place. Not the Winter Soldier, but a darkness that didn’t pass unnoticed by you.

He licked his lips, “Well, now that you have me where you want me, what will you do?”

You pressed the knife harder into his throat, “Why are you in my room?”

“Trying to kill you, I thought that was obvious,” He said with a husky deepness in his voice.

You scoffed, “Good job,” and shifted your weight. You couldn’t help but feel the stiffness in his pants pressing through your thin pajamas.

He knew you felt him because he added, “I may not be able to control how my body reacts to you, but that doesn’t change anything.”

Taking advantage of your distraction and with lightning speed, he flipped the two of you back over again.

“I’m still going to kill you,” he whispered in your ear, “I recognized you the moment I saw you today.”

Your body stiffened. No. That was a long time ago. You weren’t that person anymore, and neither was he.

You’d worked with the Winter Soldier years ago, once on a mission when you both worked for Hydra. He was brainwashed into doing what he did and you supposed you were too. Hydra convinced you that you were doing the right thing. And you thought you were, until you weren’t.

Years of trying to escape until you ran into Captain America. Sam Wilson was the only person to help you, to believe you. He’d helped so much. He got you out of there, helped you start a new life.

You may have changed, but you could see that your chemistry with the Soldat hadn’t. On the mission you worked together, all those years ago, you ended up snowed into the safe house until the next morning. The memory of tangled limbs, sweating bodies, nips, kisses, and screams of ecstasy made you shiver.

You were surprised that the man on top of you even remembered you. Hydra wiped his mind so many times.

“So, you do remember me,” You quipped, at the mercy of his knife’s razor edge.

“Doll, I remember everything,” He growled.

You ground your hips against him, “Even this?”

His eyes fluttered shut as he released a shaky breath, “Yes, especially that.”

His body stilled; he was hesitating. He swallowed hard and threw the knife with all his strength. It plunged to the hilt into the opposite wall with a solid thud.

You lunged for each other at the same time. His lips crashed into yours like a starving man and you fed him graciously.

Your fingers tangled in his short hair as he threaded his metal arm under your body to pull you closer.

He ground into you; his erection painfully obvious now. He pulled away from you for just a moment. Just long enough to help you remove your pajamas and allow you to help him remove his clothing.

Bucky trailed a finger over the front of your black lace thong, down the front and to the strip between your legs. You gasped at the feather light sensations.

Bucky bit his lip, “You’re so fucking wet, Doll.”

In one motion, he tore the panties from your body and dove down between your legs.

You gasped at his sudden movement and rested both legs on his shoulders and tangled your hand in his dark hair as you lost yourself in the sensation.

He ate greedily. You could feel every soft lick, suckle, and kiss. Every second brought you closer to the edge. You were about to—

“Bucky!” You screamed, riding out the wave of pleasure washing over you like a warm breeze.

As soon as you came down from your high, you saw him sitting up, licking his lips.

“I missed your sweet taste, Doll.”

Your breath caught under his hungry gaze. Your eyes trailed down until they landed on him. Every inch of him. You reached out and began to pump.

He closed his eyes and his breath shuddered, “Get on your belly for me.”

You obliged his request with enthusiasm. Opening your legs and lifting your butt ever so slightly into the air. You looked over your shoulder at him as you felt him against your soaking wet core. He crawled on top of you and kissed your shoulder.

“Ready?” He asked tentatively.

You grabbed his thigh with the hand you weren’t using to prop yourself up and shoved him inside you.

The two of you gasped.

His pumps went from slow and sensual, to needy and fast. He snapped into you with a desire that made your second orgasm crash over you before you knew it was upon you.

The feel of your orgasm fluttering around him spurred him on harder. He wrapped his metal arm under your chest and rested the hand lightly on your neck and he pulled your body in closer to his, his face buried in the crook of your neck and the flesh arm wrapped tightly around your waist like he was fearful you’d disappear.

He fucked you like his life depended on it. With desperation and need. And you melted into him as if he were the only thing that was real in this world.

You could feel his thrusts getting shorter, he was about to come. And so were you. Your third orgasm is what pushed him over the edge. You both cried out in unison as you felt him empty inside you.

He continued pumping until you rode out your orgasm. He stayed inside you as he trailed kisses over your shoulder and down your back, catching his breath.

You felt him twitch inside you and he began pumping again. You moaned and cried out nonsensical words as he thrust into you again. Lost in the depths of your own pleasure and the way he made you feel, you didn’t even realize he was coming again until his body collapsed onto yours.

You rolled over to face him, and the sight broke your heart. His face looked sad and worn. Tired.

He buried his face in your chest and you held him, stroking your fingers though his soft hair.

The two of you stayed like that for a long time until he leaned up and kissed you.

“I’m sorry,” He said.

“I’m sorry too. I’m not that person anymore,” You said to him.

He pressed his forehead to yours, “I guess neither of us are.”

You let your fingers trail through his soft curls, “What made you drop the knife?”

Bucky sighed, “Like I said, I recognized you immediately. Sam said I could trust you, but I was still skeptical. Then when I came in here, the Soldat recognized you and I couldn’t..”

You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion.

“He’s me, and I’m him. I can control him, he doesn’t take control of my body anymore, but I can still feel his influence. He recognized you, and once he did, I couldn’t control my reaction—didn’t want to, because I also remembered.”

He stopped and swallowed hard and you felt him stiffen again against your leg.

“Bucky,” You laughed and kissed him, “You’re gonna be the end of me.”

Super soldiers…

He laughed too as he went in for another kiss, rolling on top of you, “Doll, you have no idea.”

[a-edgar-allan-hoe]

The Last Chthonian

Bucky x Reader, Sam x Reader, Zemo x Reader

Part 12

A/N: Here is Chapter 12 lovelies! Let me know if you would like to get added to the tag list! 🖤🔮🖤

Summary: Imagine being Hekate, the Greek goddess of magic and witchcraft, the night and the moon, doorways and crossroads, creatures of the night, and ghosts and necromancy. You stumbled upon Earth many centuries ago and since then have resided on the foreign planet. During the recent years you created an alias for yourself to hide your true identity, and after the war against Thanos you chose to live out your days in the Scottish countryside, until a certain trio appear at your doorstep one day.

Warnings: language, scars

“Logan?” You stared at him wide eyed and as he turned around to face you, you rushed in for a hug like a child, wrapping your arms around his frame as he returned the gesture, rubbing your back.

It had been so long since you had seen him. Logan had always been like a father figure to you, the father you never had, even though you surpassed him by thousands of years. He always had a paternal aura about him despite his rough appearance, and he was the one person you always turned to and shared all your secrets with. You had first met him back in 1861 during the Civil War when you disguised yourself as a young man so that you could join the Union. But he had seen right through your act when you refused to change or use the restroom in front of the men, always coming up with excuses that all the soldiers fell for, well except for him. You two still liked to laugh about the story till this day. And since the day you first met him, you two had formed an inseparable bond.

“Good to see you too kid.” Logan chuckled at your reaction to seeing him.

You pulled back from the hug, looking up at him with a scowl on your face before punching him in the arm.

“Ow. The hell was that for?”

“What the hell are you doing here? And why did you have to man handle me like that? You made me drop my phone.” You snapped at him, going over to pick your phone off the floor, glancing around to make sure no one was near before going back into the hallway.

“I’m here on business. Got some punk who’s ass I gotta catch.” Logan answered your question. “And if you ask me, you seemed to be the one doing most of the man handling.”

“Only because you had to grab me like some kind of creep.” You remarked. “So what, you’re following me now?”

“Like I said, I’m huntin down this criminal, or a couple criminals you could say. Just like you got your ring of demons huntin down human traffickers and the worst of mankind, I got my work too. So, what do I see when I’m about to slice up some punk? I see your ass here, running down the middle of the streets in a stupid dress and getting shot at by bounty hunters and criminals. The hell are you doing in a place like this? It’s dangerous.” Logan lectured you before pulling out his cigar.

“No shit Sherlock. I know it’s dangerous.”

“Hey, watch your attitude.”

“Says the one who taught me that attitude in the first place.” You put your arms across your chest in a defensive stance as you argued with him. “And you’re not the only one here on a mission, alright? I’m helping out a friend.”

“Yeah? Your friend drag you into this?”

“No, I came here on my choice.”

“I thought you were laying low but fair enough.” He nodded as he lit up his cigar. “How’s Athena?”

“Oh she’s doing great. She does miss you though, won’t stop talking about how she wants to see gramps.”

“Heh, she’s a good kid, you raised her well.”

“I did the best I could as a mother.” You sighed before punching him the arm again, this time lighter. “I’m starving and you delayed me from getting my pizza by the way, you remember that and you remember it well. Let the guilt haunt you for the remainder of your days.”

“Yeah yeah, I didn’t know you were on one of those psycho food missions. C’mon, I know a spot.” Logan ruffled your hair as you followed him out of the building, walking down the night lit street as you two caught up on recent events. You noticed that you had become more comfortable with the scar on your face. You stopped turning your face away in conversations and now even looked the person you were speaking with in the eye, allowing them to get a full view. And though you still received many looks, it didn’t bother you as much as it used too and you were now less ashamed of it. After putting in effort to hide your scars for so long because you couldn’t stand the sight of them, here you were putting them on display. After all, scars told stories. But part of you wondered if it had anything to do with what Zemo had told you. The way he looked right at you when he suggested you keep them visible because he thought it suited you.

“How’s everyone at the school?” You asked Logan.

“They miss you, the students as well, especially Rogue. They’ve been begging Charles to try to convince you to come back and teach Mythology and Classic Literature again.”

“I do miss the place.” You sighed as you walked the streets with your hands in the pockets of your jacket. “But I need some time. I promise I’ll be back soon though.”

“Hey, take your time. Just don’t take a hundred years.” Logan teased.

“I won’t.”

“Hey, this is the pizza place I was talking about.” Logan patted your back before gesturing to the little pizza shop. It was a little mom-and-pop place but the aroma that came through the doors made you salivate and your stomach let out a loud growl that sounded like a monster was trapped in there.

“Finally. I’m starving.” You groaned as you went up to the counter and ordered three boxes of pizzas.

“Geez, you gonna eat all that?” Logan looked at you after the wait as you went up to the counter to pick up your three boxes of cheese pizzas.

“Nah. One of them is for me. The rest is for you and the guys.”

“What guys? The ones who were running behind you when you were getting shot at?”

“Ya.”

“You need help with those?”

“Nah I got it.” You shook your head as you stepped out of the shop, you couldn’t wait to go back to the gallery and scarf down the whole pizza by yourself. You were hoping tonight you would pass out from a food coma so you could get a decent night’s sleep.

“Y/n?” You saw Sam step out of the entrance of the building once he saw you approach. “Where have you been? You said you were making a call. And what are you doing with those pizzas?”

“Yeah well I got hungry.”

“Who’s this?” Sam asked you as he eyed Logan.

“A friend.”

“What kind of friend?”

“A good friend Sam.” You replied as you walked back in to the building, the loud music and flashing lights filling your senses annoyingly once more.

Sam carefully watched the mysterious new man you had just brought in, following behind you as you went over to where Bucky was standing by the bar, dropping the pizzas down on the counter. “Pizza time!”

“What’s this?” Bucky looked at you, questioning why you had just brought in three full boxes of pizzas.

“This is Pizza. Don’t tell me you’ve never had pizza Barnes.” You remarked as you opened up the box you brought for yourself, pulling it up in front of you as you sat down on the barstool.

“I’ve had pizza before. I’m not that uncultured.” Bucky sighed at your statement. Why did everyone assume he didn’t have a clue about most things in the world.

“I’m kidding Bucky. You’re the one who asked the question ‘what’s this?’. Those two boxes are for you guys by the way.” You nodded as you took a large bite of the warm cheesy pizza, your mouth watering from finally having what you craved and not being able to resist the satisfied moan that came out of your mouth. “Wow. You were right Logan. This shit is good.”

“Told you so.” Logan smirked as he took a slice for himself, Sam and Bucky watching with caution at who this burly man with the leather jacket was that set his cigar down on the ashtray. “Hey slow down kid, keep eating that fast and you’ll choke.”

“Fucks sake Logan. Let me enjoy my food.”

“Yeah well don’t scarf it down. And watch your mouth.”

“You watch yours old man.” You laughed.

“Old? Look who’s talking artifact.”

Sam and Bucky stood in silence as they watched the two of you bickering amongst each other. Who was this and how were you so comfortable around him? They had never seen you this much at ease and it was as if you two were close for a very long time.

Logan caught them staring at him, glowering as he got up from his seat. “Got a problem bub?”

“Who the hell are you supposed to be?” Bucky questioned as took a step towards him, he didn’t like the aura this man had about him. He looked like an asshole.

“Why do you need to know?” Logan stared him down with a scowl as he stood inches apart from him.

You watched the confrontation between Bucky and Logan and nearly choked on your pizza as you saw Logan’s admantium claws come out of his knuckles, forcing you to jump between them. Bucky and Sam noticed this and raised their brows in surprise at him. They were trying to figure out what the hell it was that just came out of his knuckles.

“Woah woah woah! Enough of the testosterone. This is just Logan you two, I’ve known him for a really long time and he’s like a father to me so you can quit the glaring. Bucky, I said quit staring. Logan, this is Sam and Bucky.”

“Hang on.” Sam realized once he recognized Logan. “You’re that one guy, Wolverine right? From the X-Men?”

“Yeah.” Logan grumbled as he sat back down to finish his slice, not wanting to converse any more though you were always an exception for him.

“Hey where’s Zemo by the way?” You brought up as you noticed he wasn’t there and you couldn’t find sight of him.

“He’s dancing.” Bucky answered your question with a look that meant unbelievable as he nodded towards the dance floor.

And as you looked, there you saw none other than Zemo himself, in the middle of the dance floor, paying no mind to others and grooving along to the bass music with movements of his hands.

“No fucking way.” You gaped with your mouth open, your pizza slice hovering inches from your lips since you were too engrossed in the scene before you. Since when did he dance? You couldn’t believe your eyes at what you saw, here was this criminal, in the middle of the dance floor pumping his fists to the beat.

“I know right.” Sam scoffed as he watched with you. “I had to look twice to make sure of what I was seeing.”

“Did he? Did he just do a finger twirl?” You squinted your eyes and scrunched your nose in disbelief.

“Yup. Yes he did.” Sam confirmed.

“Wow.” You shook your head. “Unbelievable. I could never do that.”

“I thought you were a ballerina.” Bucky asked.

“I was. But that’s different. Anyways, I’m going to retire for the night. I think I’ve seen enough.” You got up from your seat, crushing up your empty pizza box and tossing it away. You bid the men goodnight and told them to leave a few slices for Zemo if he wanted any, adding how you didn’t care if he wanted them or not, it didn’t matter to you. You bid Logan a teary farewell and hugged him, he had to head back to his place and had some matters to attend to. You were heartbroken to see him leave so soon but hoped to see him again.

After conversing a little with Sharon, you went upstairs to one of the rooms she had reserved for the four of you. It was a comfortably spacious bedroom with a modern touch, matching Sharon’s personality perfectly. You closed the door behind you and took out your bag, setting it on the table that was in the corner as you slipped out of your current clothes and into your silk nightgown. After you were done cleaning up in the bathroom, you sat down on the bed under the covers and pulled out your phone, dialing Maze’s number.

“Hey Hekate. What’s up?” You heard her voice on the other line.

“Hey Maze. How’s everything going?”

“Everything is great. Nothing bad happened today and Athena and I did finger paintings. It was so much fun.”

“That’s great! I’m happy you guys are spending quality time together.”

“Yeah, I’m happy too. How are you doing? You sound exhausted.”

“Yeah, I’m ready to knock out.” You chuckled. “Everything is running smoothly so far though.” You thought about telling her the incident involving your powers from earlier but decided against it. You didn’t need her to start worrying about you. “Hey is Athena awake?”

“I was just about done getting her ready for bed. I’ll hand her the phone.” You heard Maze say before there was the sound of rustling.

“Hi Mommy!” You heard your daughter’s voice.

“Hi sweetie! How are you?” You smiled upon hearing her voice, which was something that had always lifted your spirits.

“I’m fine mommy! Maze and I did paintings today!”

“I heard! That’s wonderful! You’ll have to show them to me when I come back. I just wanted to talk to you and make sure you were okay. I’ll let you go to sleep now. Goodnight koukouvágia, I love you.”

“I love you too mommy!” You heard Athena hand over the phone to Maze.

“Thanks again for all this Maze.” You smiled.

“Anytime girl. No need to thank me.”

“Alright.” You had let out a yawn, tears of exhaustion forming at the ends of your eyes as your lids started to get heavy while you tried to keep them open, causing your vision to get blurry in the process. “I’m going to let you sleep and I should do the same.”

“Yeah. You definitely sound like you need it. Goodnight Hekate.”

“Goodnight Maze.” You hung up the phone and set it on the nightstand. Pulling up the soft covers, you laid down on the bed with one of your arms tucked under the pillow while the other was rested on top of your stomach. You had left the curtains open to allow the bit of moonlight in the room. You stared up at the ceiling, feeling your body become numb from fatigue and it’s desperate need for sleep. You don’t remember being this tired.

As you slowly shifted to unconsciousness, your thoughts drifted off to what was to happen tomorrow before shifting to what had happened earlier between you and Zemo at the bar. The way Zemo’s gloved fingers danced patterns on your bare back and thigh still somehow managed to leave goosebumps and chills on your skin, and you felt ashamed to feel that way. Part of you pondered on whether he could have felt the scars lining your back, and you prayed he didn’t. You didn’t want to have to explain to him the story behind the scars that still haunted you till this day. As these thoughts ran through your mind, your eyes slowly fluttered closed and your body finally succumbed to what would have been the power of Hypnos, sleep.

Tag List: @girl-obsessed-with-things @aerynchromie @sunshinepower17 @viviace @kakimakiloh @thebivirgin @gambitsqueen @spookycereal-s @lulu-yuming @mochminnie @Gabitanaka47 @s00nhi @vanteguccir @tomhollandsslilslut @dracoxxyoflam @suchababie @uhhhcrypticbastard @on-my-way-to-erebor @thewinterrbucky @mylifeispainandiloveit @fillechatoyante @padmoonyfeorge @montypythonsholysnail @pollynx @aziraslowlylosestheirshit @roundbrownlover @awesomeowlbook @bookloverfilmoholic

[starbuckie]

𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭, 𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐰

challenge: 200 followers challenge by @angrybirdcr

prompt: “there may have been a slight misunderstanding, but nothing we can’t fix.” and locked in the trunk of a car

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

words: 5,504 words

warnings: post-endgame, bucky’s kinda a dick, enemies to friends(?), swearing, angst, mentions of violence, talk about sexual assault, guns, bickering, jealousy

summary: bucky had been adjusting to the new familiarity of having a stable routine, right until she walked in.

a/n: I DON’T NOT OWN ANY CHARACTERS ALL CHARACTERS BELONG TO MARVEL. okay, great, done that, but congratulations on 200 followers!! i had so much fun taking part in your writing challenge, so thank you so much. imma be honest, there’s not a lot of romance in this, it’s some enemies to friends type of shit and i genuinely did not think this fic would get so angsty and dark and actually long, but i had an idea and ran with it mid way through the old fic with this prompt. also i had an idea for an epilogue to this, so tell me if you want that part 2 because i am on the verge of writing it. this is not proofread by a beta, but i edited it myself and hope it is okay. anyways, now that we’re done with that, please enjoy this rollercoaster of a fanfic i’ve written.

main masterlist || sebastian stan characters masterlist

Life in the twenty-first century was strange, Bucky concluded. Though he’d been free of HYDRA for around nine years technically, being a fugitive and in another realm didn’t give him much time to learn about the modern world. As soon as he came back, Steve had left him and he had to move on without his childhood best friend. It was hard for him to adjust to this century, with the new rules and the whole scene in general, but he seemed to make it through just fine. He’d come to peace with the fact that there was no escaping the fighting at all, falling into a steady routine that became his holy grail. 

In the new Avengers compound in Upstate New York he felt content and more sure of himself than he’d felt in a very long time. Everyone in the tower was quiet and kept to themselves mostly, still dealing with the aftermath of losing so much in so little time. But in that silence Bucky felt like a free man, able to walk around without fear of being hunted down every second and time to really look about this new world.

There were still times when he woke up in a sweaty panic, disoriented and terrified until he realized he was in the safety of his room in the compound. He’d flinch at loud noises in the quiet and his heart would stop, something that went by unnoticed by everyone else, though he didn’t blame them for it. Bucky felt extreme guilt for the horrible things he had done as the Winter Soldier, memories of bloodied and dead bodies, bodies he had made fall to the ground motionless. It wasn’t him, he knew, but his hand still had pulled the trigger. When he found something new a smile would split across his face, ready to tell Steve what he had discovered, until he remembered that the rambunctious blond boy was gone, a wrinkled grey man with a new family in his place. It still hurt him to think that he had left him so easily, with barely a goodbye. Bucky still had days where he felt so incredibly tired, left still on his bed as horrible thoughts ran through his mind, anxious about the future.

But then he found new things everyday, things that seemed to outweigh the bad by a whole lot. He’d found cool ranch Doritos were the best chips and that he really liked the season of fall with the leaves falling around him as he took a serene walk. He found that he really loved Frozen, the songs and Sven the reindeer making him crack a smile every time he watched it. He found that he could sleep in on his days without missions and Wanda liked her pancakes with an unhealthy amount of syrup on the side to dunk them in. He found that Sam was actually really funny, always making the worst puns or the dirtiest jokes at the most inappropriate of times. He found a new sense of respect and warmth in the family they’d built together, learning how to go on without those that they loved. He found that he was really enjoying his new routine and his new sense of peace with himself.

All until she walked in.

Bucky could still remember the exact moment she flipped their world upside down. Sharon had fawned over her, talking about one of her old SHIELD buddies who was finally coming back to the states. After the organization fell in 2014, Y/N L/N fled to Hawaii, running away to the one place she knew no one would find her. She was done fighting, or that’s what she believed until Thanos showed up. 

It was shameful, really, that Y/N was aware of all the problems that went on, yet did nothing to help. They needed her help, she knew they did, but she couldn’t bring yourself to go help her friends. Originally she was trying for a settled down life, planning to retire from the constant fighting, but after a few failed relationships Y/N realized that she wasn't cut out for that white picket fence life. Those had just been the dreams of a fourteen year old Y/N L/N, left empty and hollow by the horrors she had seen during her time at SHIELD. There was nothing left waiting for her, no family, no friends, but she was too stubborn to get back into the fight, so she stayed in her humid Oahu apartment and waited for something interesting to happen.

Well, maybe Y/N shouldn’t have wished so hard, that “interesting thing” showing up in the form of being snapped out of existence by a large, purple grape.

When she came back she felt nearly indifferent, knowing that five years had passed by her, and though Y/N felt nothing but emptiness she knew that it was time to go back. It was her duty when she had joined SHIELD to always be there and protect, and she had failed that job. But Y/N was more than ready to make up for it. Nothing like Thanos could ever happen again, so she called Sharon, one of her closest friends and previous commanding supervisor at the organization. She was ecstatic to have Y/N back, probably a bit too much, and before she could have second thoughts the girl was on a plane overlooking JFK, ready to land in New York.

So when Y/N walked in, with a tight-lipped smile and butterflies anxiously fluttering in her stomach, Bucky couldn’t help but despise her. Maybe he had formed his opinion off of Sharon’s explanation of her past, but Y/N got the life of settling down that he didn’t and he was infuriatingly jealous. 

“Hey, Bucky, Sam, come meet Y/N!” Sharon said excitedly. Her hair was put back in a headband neatly, two suitcases in hand as she looked at the two tall, muscular men. Of course Y/N recognized both of them, she hadn’t been living under a rock. Keeping up with the news of the Avengers and remaining SHIELD officers had been one of the only things keeping her from coming back, hearing of the terrible fights and destruction done to whole cities. She recognized Sam Wilson, the infamous Falcon being marked down as a “war criminal” in 2016. She never believed that crap, if he and half of the other Avengers were locked up there had to be a good reason behind it.

Then, there was James Buchanan Barnes. Now, she knew him from her eighth grade American history books, reading about the brave Howling Commando who had given up his life for saving the country, but Y/N knew him better as the Winter Soldier from her time at SHIELD. The fight in 2014 had been brutal, hectic in all forms, but she’d caught a few glances at the metal-armed man. He hadn't been in his normal state, with being controlled and tortured by HYDRA at the time, but the kid inside of her freaked out, remembering memories of gossiping with her friends about how hot he was in the textbooks and how much of a hero he was. That man was still in there somewhere, hidden by decades of reprogramming and mind-wiping, and Y/N was finally seeing him in the flesh. She would be working with him daily, living in the same space as him. The thought made her giddy like a middle schooler with her first crush,though his presence was intimidating as well.

“Hi there, I’m Y/N L/N, it’s a pleasure to be working with you.” Sticking out her hand, she gave a bright smile, already growing out of her nervous state. 

Sam quickly shook Y/N’s hand, giving a warm greeting in response to her introduction. Then she turned to Bucky. “It’s nice to meet you, Bucky.”

His cold, dead glare locked onto Y/N, staring straight through her soul. It felt like he could see every insecurity and guilty action she had, and she didn’t like it one bit. “That’s Sergeant Barnes to you.” Without another word, he walked out of the room like a petulant child, leaving Sharon, Sam, and Y/N flabbergasted. 

“I’m sorry, Y/N, he’s usually more friendly than that, I’ll go check in on him,” Sharon furiously said with a painfully fake smile. Sam grabbed the new girl by the arm, linking it with his own and led her in another direction as he explained the usual training routine and schedule for the week. 

And while she was completely enraptured by Sam’s comforting words and the exciting compound, her heart still felt heavy from Sergeant Barnes’ cold greeting. 

-

She had tried to be nice. She really had. But after two months it was pretty clear Sergeant Barnes wasn’t getting any better, and Y/N was beyond pissed off. Childish, is what he was being, fucking childish. 

It started off with leaving every room she came into, blatantly ignoring her presence. When she would say hello every morning he’d grunt or even worse, he wouldn’t answer her at all. Y/N had begged Sharon if she knew why the sergeant was acting up, but she didn’t know either and just asked her to ignore him and his “crappy, old-man behaviour”. Sam wasn’t very helpful to Y/N’s cause either, but he was a great mentor and an even better teacher.

Sharon was really the only person Y/N had in her phone, her parents dead and no boyfriend accounted for. The rest of her family had wanted nothing to do with her when she joined SHIELD, but that was okay with her. She knew what she had gotten herself into, and it was an extreme risk to even be acquaintances with her. But now, living with several others in a compound that seemed so large after the great loss, Y/N became part of their family as well. 

It was nice to have friends again, as years of solitude on an island where she knew nobody had made her nearly desperate for more human interaction than with the teenagers who worked the cash registers at the grocery store. Y/N became an integral part of the Avengers (she could actually say that aloud now), going on missions and kicking ass just like she used to. Of course, Sergeant Barnes’ behaviour in and out of missions stayed the same, but she usually tried her best to not take it to heart and move on. After all, she couldn’t have everyone like her.

But one day they both snapped.

Y/N was sitting with Sharon and Wanda, eating lunch and talking over their most recent mission with them and Barnes in Cairo. It hadn’t been a necessarily bad mission, per se, but she had run back into the building to get Wanda out from under a fallen pillar, which apparently was “severely dangerous”. Looking back, she could see how it was, putting her entire team’s secrecy and mission in volatile danger, but Wanda was like her sister and in Y/N’s heart she knew that she had to. Bucky had had to grab them both, nearly dragging her back to the jet before the building had collapsed. He’d been beyond angry with Y/N for the stupid decision, but when they landed he just huffed and stomped away. The redhead was grateful for her and so was Sharon, but lunch was just for a simple stern talking about mission protocols. 

“Y/N, I know that you’re a fantastic agent and even better friend, but when we’re on missions we need that agent. You can’t let your feelings and outside life get in the way of our objective.” Sharon said in a firm voice. Y/N dropped her head in her hands and rubbed her face tiredly.

“I know, Sharon, I’m sorry, Wanda could’ve probably gotten herself out but I just let my instincts act too fast and ran back in without another thought.” She groaned. “Plus, I just caused more damage than anything else. It won’t happen again, I promise.” Wanda and Sharon nodded in understanding just as the Asshole Supreme walked into the kitchen.

“You talking ‘bout how Y/N fucked up the mission yesterday?” Sergeant Barnes grunted. While Sharon and Wanda gasped in shock, Y/N’s eyes were trained at the plate on the table in front of her, not daring to make a sound. She muttered out a sorry and got up to put her dish in the sink. As long as he was here, he was going to make her life a living hell, and as much as she wanted to lash out, it would be cause for her dismissal from the team. While her old, solitary life was what she had once dreamed of, Y/N now saw her future among these people, this family, somewhere she finally felt a part of despite Barnes’ horrid behaviour. “Sorry?” He scoffed, “Sorry doesn’t make up for the fact that I had to run back in for you. Sorry doesn’t make up for the extreme risks we all pull to save your ass out in the field.”

“Bucky, stop.” Sharon yelled.

But he ignored her words and sauntered over to Y/N with a knowing smirk, leaning down to meet her level. His warm breath hit her face and she could stare into his deep eyes, swirling like a raging storm of blues and greys. “You shouldn’t even be out there, L/N. I mean, you haven’t had training in years, it’s not like you were anything special either. Just another agent, hoping to get to work in the big leagues.”

“Shut up.” Y/N whispered meekly. Tears were just barely being held in, her chest feeling empty and hollow with anger and guilt. Is this what it felt like to want to kill someone with so much vengeance? 

“Where were you when Thanos came? Where were you, L/N? We needed all the help we could get, but there you are, in fucking Hawaii, with you little fucking margaritas on the fucking beach-”

“Shut the fuck up!” She screamed. The room went dead silent with her voice. None of the team had seen Y/N look so angry, so sad, so vulnerable, at one time. It was easy for her to hide her emotions and Wanda refrained from trying to toy with her mind, but shame was overwhelming the girl by the second and Sergeant Barnes was right, as much as she didn’t want to say it. She was a coward, thinking she could run away from the “hero life” so easily. They’d caught her, and Barnes was making her face that truth right now. “Don’t you think I know that? Don’t you think I know, that I was absolutely scared shitless of returning here, facing all of you after what you endured for so long?” 

Y/N took a deep breath, laughing mirthlessly as tears ran hot down her cheeks. “I’m sorry that I came back, I really am, but I’m trying my damn best to make up for what I did. Being scared is no excuse for why I ran away, I was fucking terrified of having one more thing to lose. My family is dead, SHIELD fell, and I had no one to lean on so I ran as far as I fucking could. But I’m back now, I’m ready to serve up to what I left behind, and you better fucking deal with it because this,” she jabbed a finger into his broad chest, “is not fucking it. I’m not going to live with your shitty behaviour anymore, Barnes.”

He, Wanda, and Sharon all watched as she slammed the plate into the sink, storming out of the room. They could hear her door slam shut, and the two women glared at Bucky.

“What the hell is your problem, Barnes” Wanda hissed in a scarily low voice. Fuck. He knew he’d messed up then, gone farther than he ever dared to with insulting Y/N, and both of the women were severely overprotective of the new Avenger. 

Sharon walked up to Bucky with large strides, delivering a slap to the side of his head. Yeah, he definitely deserved that. It was dead silent in the kitchen, the tension still high strung from the fight seconds before. “You better go apologize, Barnes, I swear to God this has gotten far too out of hand. You two have a mission tomorrow, estimated a month, and wheels are up at 2300 hours. I need you two to go get the intel quietly and undetected and we can’t have both of you arguing the whole damn time, so you better fix things by then.”

The blonde agent walked away, Wanda trailing behind her, but not without the middle finger from both of them. A mission? Tomorrow? With Y/N? This was going to be horrible. Bucky ran a hand over his face and trudged off to his room. 

It was going to be a long month.

-

Y/N stared out of the window as they flew over the clouds above the Mediteranean Sea. Eleven in the morning in Italy gave a clear view of the skies, light blue as far as she could see. They were ready to start their descent into Azzano and the woman glanced to the man beside her, his stormy blue eyes glaring in any direction but hers. The sergeant had avoided her all he could up until they boarded the jet, and even then he only spoke to her when necessary. “Hey, Barnes, we’re starting to descend, go get ready.”

The brunette looked over to Y/N and grunted in response. Oh well, it was better than him yelling at her. His little outburst in the kitchen had her pissed at him more than ever, but the words thrown around still rung true in her head. But now wasn’t the time to think about that.

She paid careful attention to where she was supposed to land, a shaded facility almost five miles south of where they had to get the intel from an old, but rebuilt HYDRA base. The same base where James Buchanan Barnes was once held captive, experimented on and tortured until Steve Rogers came to save him. Y/N didn’t care much for Barnes usually, but she also didn’t know how he’d react to being in a location with such horrible memories attached to it. They had both been at the mission briefing the day before of course, he knew what it entailed and he seemed unfazed, and he was always good at hiding his emotions. As the jet touched down finally, the agent thought back. Well, sometimes he was good at hiding his emotions.

Making sure her comm fit snugly in her ear, Y/N unbuckled herself from the seat, heading back towards the wall of weaponry they kept in the back of the jet. Barnes was already there dressed in hs black kevlar tactical suit, hugging his body nicely and vibranium arm on display. When he was around her he tried to hide it, and she saw him joking around and being comfortable in other’s presence with it out, wondering what made her so different. She personally found it fascinating, the beauty of the gold and black metal with the incredible Wakandan technology, but she respected his privacy and tried to not think too much about it. 

Y/N threw a vest on over her own navy blue tac suit, tightening her combat boots before she fully zipped up. Were they finally ready?

Three guns perched in holsters by her waist.

Two taps to her earpiece and Barnes’ breathing in her ear.

One mutual nod with the sergeant himself, and they were off, slowly making their way to grab the intel, not a trace to be left behind. 

-

Getting stuck in the trunk of a car was not in the plan. It definitely wasn’t. Bucky remembered every single inch and cranny of that meticulously planned out schedule, every move, every kill they had to make, but not once was it mentioned that Y/N was to get stuck in Baron Zemo’s car without any weapons on her.

“L/N, what the hell do you mean you’re in the back of Zemo’s car.” He seethed, already searching frantically around the large remains of the building for her. It had gone smoothly, she was just supposed to quickly check inside his car as he searched the base. It’ll be so much quicker if I do it, L/N, is what he had said, but now he regretted it. Like the incompetent fool she was, she was spotted and ended up shooting out half of Zemo’s goonies before dropping all her weapons to the ground and running when she ran out of ammunition.

“There may have been a slight misunderstanding,” Y/N whispered into her comm, “but nothing we can’t fix! Just come find me, Barnes, and all will be well.”

She could hear his angry curses and jostling, which she assumed he was running to come find her. It wasn’t entirely Y/N’s fault she had run out of ammo. Some of it must have fallen from her pockets during the shootout and when she saw the car she thought it’d be the perfect place to hide. Until she realized that no one else was at the partially burned down HYDRA base besides Baron Zemo, the person who Sharon had told her to avoid at all costs, and she was in his damn car. Practically her death note.

“If you had just listened to me you wouldn’t have been caught!” Bucky furiously whispered through the comms. 

Y/N rolled her eyes, though he couldn’t even see her, and groaned. “I did listen to you, Barnes, I checked the damn car, but we weren’t expecting his guards to find me so I killed them and hid. Is that actually so bad?” 

“Yes it is!’ He explained. “Give me your coordinates.” She checked the small watch on her wrist, pushing a button on the side that gave a small holographic image of the time and her coordinates on a world wide map. Reciting them for him, Bucky followed, continuing to berate her as he did so. “And you’re right, L/N, I asked you to check the car, not fucking jump inside it!”

This time Bucky could envision her rolling her eyes as she groaned even louder in very Y/N L/N fashion. “Would you rather I be dead?” She asked. It had been a few seconds, but she still received no response. “Barnes?” Crackling. “Sergeant?” Absolute nothingness. “Sarge?”

The trunk of the car opened as the woman let out a squeak, the broad frame of James Barnes hovering above her, some dirt smudged around the annoyed expression on his face. “Don’t call me that.” He grumbled.

He reached his hand towards her, grasping her own tightly before pulling her to a sitting position. “Why, you had all the ladies calling you that back in the day?” She mimicked a much higher tone, nearly resembling Snow White if the princess were high on drugs and had a Brooklyn accent. “Hey, Sarge, we goin’ dancing? Sarge, you goin’ to give me some sweet lovin’ tonight? Oh, how I’d just love for you to shove your fat, ugly head up your a-”

A loud beeping from his wristwatch cut her off. With a glare, the man let go of Y/N’s hand, checking to see what the problem was. A small red tracker on the map moved, and both of them knew they were in deep shit. “Crap, Zemo’s coming this way. That’s one of the trackers I set up on the ground and we gotta go quick.”

Faint whistling from Baron Zemo made both of them panic as Bucky tackled her back down and quickly shut the door behind him. Footsteps were approaching, the whistling getting louder and a door opening let the two Avengers know that they couldn’t get out anytime soon. Y/N could feel Bucky’s racing heart against her chest, hers beating just as fast. He turned to face her, a lot closer than both of them expected, lips dangerously close and noses nudging against each other. Ther breaths mixed together, the hot air of the car doing nothing to help her current close quarters with the man. 

“Can you bust us out of here?” She whispered hurriedly, rather uncomfortable with the present situation.

“We’ll die if we leave now. He’s much more prepared than we thought and with half his men down he knows something is up. Zemo wasn’t even supposed to know we were here so we’re far too unprepared and you lost your damn weapons. There’s no way we can go out so we’re going to stick in here until he gets out.”

Truth be told, Bucky was terrified and had no clue what to do next. Being stuck in a small confined space with Y/N had to be his worst nightmare, especially after he didn’t apologize for his shitty behavior last night. And the night before. 

And the several months before that.

From his view Y/N seemed to be uncomfortable and as the car started moving, she wiggled around, struggling to get as far away from Bucky as she could. He too was extremely uncomfortable, but as her wriggling continued, his already tight fitting pants seemed to get even impossible tighter as she practically grinded on him. 

“Would you stop squirming around?” Y/N shot him what would’ve been a questioning glance if not for the pitch blackness of the trunk, and heard his loud sigh, warm breath fanning across her face. “I’m sorry, I’m having a situation, uh, down there and your wiggling isn’t helping it too much.”

Her face heated up, not knowing what to feel after he said that. Was he… flustered? Y/N had never seen Bucky Barnes anything less than grumpy or professional before.

When she said nothing, he assumed the worst and thought she saw him as a disgusting and creepy person. Before that moment he’d never had any particular care about how Y/N felt, but he knew that there were still a lot of perverts, if not more perverts than back in his day. With his four little sisters always getting catcalled and the crude men who thought women were their property, Bucky knew it was definitely terrifying to be assaulted or any situation such as this. 

There wasn’t much he could do, but he shifted so they weren’t lying down hip bone to hip bone. “Sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable, I don’t want you to think I’m a pervert or anything, it’s just been a while since I, well, y’know…”

“I understand, Barnes, but thank you for apologizing.” Y/N said carefully. It was weird to hear the now shy and surprisingly considerate sergeant apologize to her, but she had to admit that her respect for him had gone up. 

He cleared his throat in return, trying to turn in any other direction besides hers as they listened to the tires of the car bumping along the road, heart wildly thumping. 

It was quiet. Far more quiet than it had ever been when either of them were in the same room. As Y/N stared down at Bucky’s head, almost resting on her stomach, she saw the man she’d read about in middle school. For a moment she was able to look past the last few months of fighting and hatred, and see the noble sergeant she’d admired for so long. 

“You can rest your head if you want to, I knew keeping it up like that must be hurting your neck. I promise I’m okay with it.” She reassured him. With a small hesitation, Barnes submitted to his screaming neck muscles and laid his head on her stomach, the vest providing cushion. A few more seconds of silence and gathering courage, and she finally asked him the question she had been wondering since her first day at the compound. “Why do you hate me?”

I’m jealous, he wanted to say, but he wasn’t brave enough to say it. With a small sigh, he managed to get out, “I don’t.”

“Then why are you so cold to me all the time?” Emotions that were borrowed so deep inside Y/N’s chest seemed to come barreling out, seeping into every question that she asked. “Am I really that horrible an agent? Do you not think I’m trying my best? I know I made a mistake, I wasn’t there when you all needed me, but I’m trying so, so damn hard to make up for it. I swear on my life, and every one that comes after it, that I’m-”

“It’s not you, it’s me, God damn it!” Bucky exclaimed angrily. Both of their blood ran cold in fear that Zemo might have heard them, but the radio continued to drone on in the background, nothing seeming to have changed. He took a deep sigh and tried how to best explain it to her. Even though he’d probably never have Y/N’s forgiveness for insulting her so plainly and hurting her so much, he felt as though she deserved as much as his reasoning as to why he “disliked” her so much. It was difficult for him to say, having to also put his pride away for once to just admit it. “I’m jealous of you, Y/N. You got the sweet life for a while, and that’s all I’ve ever wanted. When you look at us who remain, not a single one of us was planning to be an Avenger. You were getting the dream home, the kids, the family that I’ve wanted since I was a boy back in Brooklyn, and all you had to do to get it was run away. It was so simple.”

Y/N’s eyes widened, not at all expecting that. “It wasn’t all too much ‘sweet life’, you know? It was my dream when I was younger, I thought being an agent was temporary and then I’d move into a big, old house with a loving spouse and have millions of little carbon copies of myself to occupy my days. But the truth about what we do is that we can only stay away from it for so long, Barnes. With people like us,” she squeezed her eyes shut, letting the final tears roll down her cheeks, “there’s no running away from the hero's life. It's just who we are. We’ve already done too much to change that part of our lives.” 

Y/N felt him nod through the fabric on her skin, sniffles letting her know that he was crying too. They were connected. All the shouting, all the yelling, the pain, the battles, the fore, the blood, the years of torture, all led to this moment. This historic moment in Y/N and Bucky’s relationship where they both waved white flags, wet faces and hearts filled with sorrow for the life they never had. 

“I’m so sorry for the way I dealt with my anger and jealousy, Y/N.” Bucky croaked. 

“I used to idolize you when I was a kid.” Y/N recalled with a faint smile on her face. “In the eighth grade I wrote a history paper on you, Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, American hero and inspiration to all. And you know, I always kinda had a crush on you. Wondered what it would be like if you were still alive, if you would’ve gone home after the war, if you would’ve had a family. No matter what wild thoughts ran through my head, though, you were always my hero.” Bucky took her confession in shock, pure amazement and surprise coursing through his body. Maybe a little bit of sadness, longing for that old life, maybe a bit of bashfulness of her having a crush on his as a schoolgirl. “And then I met you and you were this grumpy, irritable old man who seemed to despise me as soon as I walked in the door. Definitely not what I had expected.” He opened his mouth, ready to apologize again, when her next words cut him off. “I want to start over, don’t you?”

How was she so calming? Her words were exactly what he needed to hear and didn’t need to at the same time. Her voice brought back all the old memories of running around New York with Steve as a kid, reminding him of his wise ma in a way. “There’s nothing I’d like more than that, Y/N.”

Y/N smiled to herself, looking towards the top of the car. “Perfect.”

And with the twinkle in her eye and his head resting on her stomach with a small grin, it really was.

[amerrierworld]

Babysitter (pt 9)

Thor (Ragnarok) - fanfiction

Pt 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 

Summary: A Loki interlude.

Characters: Hela, Loki

Word Count: 2,111

Warnings: Idk, swearing?

Loki was incredibly annoyed at the current situation. 

He’d woken up on a random, clunky spaceship with a pounding head and a bruised neck. He remembered the world going blank and being quite certain that he’d been dead until, frustratingly so, his lungs gasped for the most painful breath he’d ever taken. 

A janky pirate ship had snatched him from floating in space amongst the debris, stripped him of his armour -no doubt to sell or melt down into other knick knacks- and left him in the back amongst the cargo. They’d presumed he was dead, so when he had woken up, they had a bit of a shock. 

Not a word was comprehensible, Loki couldn't understand whatever gibberish language they spoke, so he ignored them and shuffled to their food supply. That got him a whack on his back from a whip and a kick to the back of the knees. 

Trying to take back his armour also earned him a few bruises. They didn’t seem very dangerous, but quite a nuisance. 

Amongst the cargo he found familiar debris that struck an icy chord inside Loki. There were piles of Asgardian clothing- ripped and filthy, but Asgardian nonetheless. Bags with very few belongings, and metal scraps of the ship they had been on. 

It didn’t take a genius to figure out that the remainder of the ship of refugees was probably lost. When the pirates began to beat him again for rummaging through their stuff, a rusty old pipe amongst the stolen goods helped quiet them down immensely. 

With his kidnappers knocked out, Loki scarfed down what measly rations they had and set course for Earth at light speed -well, the closest speed they got to light speed which was more like a quick paced jog. 

He tied up the crew and tossed them in the back, and lounged in the cockpit as the ship traveled on autopilot, picking scraps of food from between his teeth. 

Communications on this ship were absolute garbage, he concluded. There was barely any signal and he couldn’t figure out where the closest planet was. So, he took a nap, ate some more food, and tried not to think too much about the harrowing experience of Thanos choking him to death.

Hours later, they entered a very familiar atmosphere. Loki let the ship crash-land, grabbed a bag of few supplies and hopped out just before they hit the ground. 

He marched on through the thicket of trees where they landed. Angry shouts that were no doubt curse words echoed from the smoking ship as he left them behind and tried to gather his bearings. 

An old cabin was the first building he saw. With a rusty dagger at the ready, he inspected the home around the back, looking for a vehicle he could take, something to get him moving faster than his legs, when suddenly a high pitched shriek nearly shattered his eardrums.

A young girl, no older than six, was staring at him with big brown eyes. Rain boots covered in mud, an aged stuffy in her hands. Loki put his finger to his lips, dreading that he was going to have to kill the girl before she gave him away or screamed bloody murder. 

“Daddy! There’s an Avenger in the yard!” she sped off towards a shed, where there was a light on inside. Loki’s shoulders slumped in disappointment. Whatever outcome he was expecting, this was by far the worst. 

“I’m not- fuck.”

He shoved the dagger away and out of sight and stomped towards the shed, fuming with annoyance. He was about to go off at the man for letting his daughter talk to random strangers and how he certainly was not an Avenger, but the man in question had a large saw in hand and about 200 pounds of muscle to carry, so he snapped his mouth shut. 

“Oh, hello there,” he said, his daughter bouncing about the workshop. “What brings one of you all the way out here?”

“And where exactly is out here?” Loki asked.

“Canada! What, you superheroes never been to Canada before? Always hanging around New York, eh? Are you taking a trip or something?”

“No. I, uh, crash-landed here.”

“From space?” the girl piped up, gawking.

“Yes, from space,” Loki said through gritted teeth. “Fighting angry aliens.”

“I told you, Daddy! He’s a hero!”

“I bet you’re trying to find your way to America, then? Lord knows why, there’s all kinds of weird things happening around town nowadays.”

“What do you mean?”

“Half the world’s gone! Poof! Just like that, some alien business I bet.”

“Are you going to save us from them?” his daughter asked again. Loki sighed.

“I’ll try my best. Now, can you please show me how to get to New York as fast as possible?”

The lumberjack’s husband took Loki and his daughter in his jeep and drove a merry long way to the nearest airport. On the way, the little girl asked him all sorts of questions about the Avengers, that he could only half-answer.

“Is it true Thor is super powerful?”

“Well. He's not that powerful. He just uses a hammer. Anyone with a hammer can use it as a weapon and suddenly be considered powerful.”

“I wish I had a super powerful hammer. Then my brothers would stop teasing me so much.”

“Hey,” her second father softly scolded.

“They’re mean!”

“Sibling feuds? I know the feeling,” Loki muttered.

“Do you have siblings, Mr. Avenger?”

“Sure do,” he smiled wryly. “Absolute bullies.”

“Me too!”

“Hey now, let our guest settle down a bit,” her dad said. “She gets a little excited around new people, so sorry.”

“It’s no problem.”

“The local airport’s just up here. It’ll take you to Detroit, and then you gotta get a connection flight to New York.”

“Thank you,” Loki said, genuinely.

“Why are you going to New York, Mr. Avenger?”

“To find my siblings,” Loki sighed. “At least, one of them should still be there.”

“But they’re mean to you?”

“Yeah,” Loki pondered as the car came to a stop. “But they’re family. I suppose.”

-

A few cunning lies and disguises later, Loki was suddenly landing in New York, amidst chaos. It had been a few days since he’d woken up, and apparently a few days since what they call the ‘Blip’. Humans clearly don’t like having their realities altered. 

Your home was abandoned. Alfred didn't even greet Loki at the door, and no amount of pulling and prying opened it for him. The lights were off, and he feared the worst.

It wasn’t until he was in the streets and overhead muttering about some crazy goth lady terrorizing a nearby street that Loki thought he had finally found something.  

He marched down the street until, to his surprise, he found Hela sitting hunched on the side walk, scowling and daring anyone to come close to her. She looked incredibly tired and disheveled, but her eyes were clear and angry, and recognized her idiot brother immediately. 

“What the hell brought you back here?” Hela snarled. 

“A toddler’s wisdom, if you’ll believe it,” Loki said, ignoring her glare as he sat down next to her. 

“You look like shit.”

“Thanks. So do you.”

Hela grumbled. 

“Have you eaten?”

“Since when did you become Mother? I don't need your help.”

“Really?” Loki picked up a filthy scoop from a pile of three ice cream tubs that were fully devoured. He dangled it from his fingertips for a moment, pulling a face. “I think you do.”

“You’re supposed to be dead.”

“Glad to see you too, sister.”

Silence. Hela really did look like shit, Loki noted. Her hair was mussed, and there were rips and broken pieces in her armour, reminiscent of the time they’d met. She had to be weak not to bother fixing it with her powers, or was just too preoccupied to even think to fix it. 

“Where’s Y/N?” Loki asked. 

“Beats me.”

“Did you kill her?”

Hela’s eyes snapped to his, a sudden fire in them. “How dare you say that?”

“Well, her home is abandoned and no one answered the door, and you’re here  cowering like a criminal. One makes conclusions.”

Something changed in her expression, and she turned her body to face him. “Abandoned?”

Loki frowned, “yes. Didn't you know?”

“No- I.. I’ve been here, the last time I saw her...” 

Hela jumped to her feet, nearly kicking Loki in the process. “That bastard, he took her, didn’t he? Him and his awful, forsaken pieces of shit he calls friends.”

“Who?”

“Our darling brother,” she spat. “He came in and- and threatened me, and then took her from me.”

She paced in front of him, green fire trailing behind her heels, hot with anger. She had expected you to come find her, take her back to your home, make her feel safe. But when you never came she had assumed you had abandoned her. Now, knowing Thor had taken you instead, filled her with rage.

“Where does your little posse hang out, hm? Some supposed secret lair? A great big castle in the sky?”

Loki blinked at her, at her sudden outbursts, at the scared glances from passerbys, and didn’t know what to say.

“Fine then, I’ll get her myself,” she growled, turning away from him. 

Loki nearly let her walk away, let her walk into whatever doom she was getting  herself into, but with a groan and a mad realization, he knew she was the only one he could rely on right now.

“Wait,” he said, reluctantly, hurrying after her and grabbing her arm. “You can’t just go running off. Tell me what happened.”

Hela spat at his feet. “I don’t need to tell you anything.”

“You care about her, don't you? Y/N? Why else would you want to ‘rescue’ her from our brother?”

“Be silent,” she hissed.

“No, no, I’m right, aren’t I? You care for her, but you messed up, and now you have no one on your side. That’s why you left, and that’s why Thor had to take her.”

Hela yanked her arm away before Loki could see her face, but he knew what she felt; remorse, and loss. 

“Tell me.”

And so, reluctantly, knowing she had no other choice, Hela sat him down, this time on an actual park bench rather than the ground. She told him what had happened, how her mistrust had turned to affection for you, and how Thanos had destroyed everything in the end, and how the Avengers had fought her out of fear.

“I know the feeling,” Loki agreed, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, watching an elderly lady feed a bunch of pigeons as if nothing drastic had happened to the world the past few days. 

“And now I don't know where she is, and she probably hates me, but who am I to blame her for that?”

“If I know anything about Y/N, is that she cares about everyone, but it takes a lot more to win her love. She doesn’t hate you. She’s just afraid. I mean, you did after all break her window and run off into nowhere.”

Hela stayed quiet, made an annoyed sound in her throat, and looked away.

“I’m starving, how did you get all that ice-cream? Why not an actual meal? Or were you just eating your feelings?”

“Y/N doesn’t like it when I kill people, so it was either massacre the street or steal their dairy products,” Hela bristled. 

“Fair enough.”

“Now what, hm? You come out here, seemingly from the dead, chastise me for messing up, and now judge my diet? What do you really want, Loki?”

“Not sure, to be perfectly honest,” Loki said. “I thought I was dead, and then I wasn’t. Frankly, my priorities are shifting.”

“And what is your current priority?”

“Getting you back to Y/N so you stop moping around and fix this.”

“And how do you suppose we do that?”

Loki grinned, standing up. His armour shimmered and regained its full glamour; horned helmet and deep green cloak. 

“Taking notes from me, are we?” Hela grumbled. Loki glared at her.

“I was wearing this look long before you got here. Now, get up, we’re going to infiltrate the Avengers and give you your romantic happily-ever-after so you stop being such a pain in everyone’s neck.”

“You think we’ll just be able to get in? You really are as mad as Father was.”

“I’ve broken into quite a few places over the years, I’ll have you know. I’m the God of Mischief after all.”

“Am I supposed to be impressed?” Hela stood, her own armour strengthening again. 

“Shut it.”

A/N: Loki is not dead! I know he’s technically alive in an alternate universe or whatever.. but I wanted the Odin Trio to be together sooooo here we are. Let me know what you think!!

taglist: @midnight-lestrange​​ @cheerfullyvenomous​ @germansarechill​@gaylorrds @amii-nyc​ @waitingfortheendtocome​ @novakitten0901​@marvels-writings​ 

[hale-13]

Into the Atmosphere

By Hale13

For the Summer of Whump Day 13 - Sacrificed

The Infinity Gauntlet, lying harmlessly but ominously in his hands, pulsed with a preternatural warmth and feeling of power that seeped through the Iron Spider and his regular Spidey suit under it. It felt more like a siren’s call than Peter felt comfortable with and he could understand the inclination to slip it on and wield that power.

Words: 2674, Chapters: 1/1 (Complete), Language: English

Fandoms: Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)

Rating: Teen

Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark

Characters: Pet er Parker, Tony Stark, Stephen Strange, Thanos

TW: Major Character Injury

Read on AO3 or below the line break.

As a native New Yorker, Peter was used to weird shit as a kid. Watching a wormhole open over the new Stark Industries building? Watching hoards of aliens and space whales filter through to invade Manhattan? No one was prepared for that, least of all a kid.

May and Ben, an ER nurse and a police officer respectively had both been held up at work and had not been home with Peter, leaving him completely alone. His heart had pounded in his chest, triggering multiple asthma attacks that were barely mitigated with his inhaler, as he watched and wondered if he would ever see his remaining family ever again. Seeing Iron Man fly a nuke launched by his over government into the wormhole and nearly die had probably affected him more than he cared to admit.

But that was then. Now, Peter had no problem throwing himself head first into danger at smallest provocation. But, that being said, even this was a bit much for him.

The Infinity Gauntlet, lying harmlessly but ominously in his hands, pulsed with a preternatural warmth and feeling of power that seeped through the Iron Spider and his regular Spidey suit under it. It felt more like a siren’s call than Peter felt comfortable with and he could understand the inclination to slip it on and wield that power.

He didn’t stop though. He didn’t give in a slip on the glove or let anything close enough to take it from him, dodging another blast from one of the dog-alien-things and letting his suit’s nanotech appendages (Instant Kill activated and Karen in partial control) stab the creature through its chest and fling it into the distance. Finally reaching a mostly unoccupied area of the battlefield, Peter paused to catch his breath and made an aborted move to rub away the blood he could feeling pooling from his nose onto his upper lip.

A pointless move really. He was wearing a mask after all.

The blond woman who had descended from space (actual space what the hell) in a fiery halo had tried to reach him but was held up by a veritable flood of aliens all vying for her attention. From Peter’s perspective it didn’t look like any of them were really much of a challenge for her but they made up for weakness in sheer numbers; keeping her overwhelmed and unable to break free.

Peter stumbled on tired and weak legs (it had apparently been five years after all, he reserved the right to be tired), doing his best to continue to dodge and disarm as many enemies as he could while still protecting the gauntlet. The rest of the extended Avengers, the Wakandans, the Asgardians were too busy with their own adversaries to help him. In the distance, Iron Man was blasting through the opposition unreservedly, clearly headed in Peter’s direction but vastly too slow to make a difference.

“Hello child,” Thanos deep voice said from behind him, making Peter’s Spidey sense explode. The titan was calm and quiet compared to the battle raging around them. Peter turned and tripped as he tried to back away as quickly as possible. “You have something there that doesn’t belong to you.”

“You can’t have it,” Peter said, surprising himself at the strength and steadiness of his voice compared to the thrum of fear and anxiety sparking through his nerves like lightning.

Thanos tilted his head, inquisitive and regarding Peter with a small, indulgent almost fatherly grin on his face and Peter felt a shiver course down his spine in warning. “You are brave little one. Perhaps to the point of foolishness but brave nonetheless,” he reached out with a weathered hand to grab the gauntlet but the spider legs attached to Peter’s suit lashed out in offense, Peter’s own free hand shooting up to knock Thanos’ aside.

“No means no asshole,” Peter grunted, scuttling up a mound of rocks behind him so he wasn’t at such a height deficit. “Fuck off.”

Thanos just tsk’d and looked at Peter with disappointment like he was a misbehaving puppy or a child throwing a temper tantrum. “I would rather not have to kill you boy. Hand it over.”

Before Peter could open up his mouth to retort, planning on stalling, the glowing woman (Captain Marvel his brain corrected) smacked into the titan’s side and knocked him away from Peter, her glowing fists more than enough to take him on. His expression had changed from benevolent to murderous as he pulled himself to his feet and threw a return punch, eyes never straying from the Infinity Gauntlet in Peter’s hands. “Uh guys?” Peter squeaked into his comms, turning and running away as quickly as his tired body could take him – aiming for the shitty van Ant-Man had been working to repair. “We’ve got to get ride of this thing – anyone free to help?”

“I’m coming Queens,” Captain America panted. “Hang in there,” he said with a grunt, wading his way across the ruins using both his broken shield and Mjolnir to mow down everyone in his way with extreme prejudice. Watching from the corner of his eye Peter’s stomach dropped: there was no way Cap would reach him in time as tired and injured as he was. Mr. Stark was stuck in a similar position, his nanotech suit morphing around him like high tech water to compensate for all of the damage it had taken.

A cold spike of fear went through Peter: they were going to lose. They were going to lose to Thanos again and this time they had pissed him off enough that he would probably forgo the random chance aspect of his plan and kill all of them. He was going to kill all of the Avengers and May and Peter’s friends. He was going to kill everyone who had just been brought back after five years. They would all be gone again.

Peter guzzled air that never quite seemed to reach his lungs, panicking but not stopping in his mad rush to get the gauntlet as far away as possible (hopefully back to the past where the stones belonged), the sounds of the battle muffled and silent around him. As if by fate, he glanced up and locked eyes with Dr. Strange, stuck holding back a spout of water that would otherwise flood the field, but with his attention solely focused on Peter.

His face was sad and sympathetic as he grimaced and held up a single, shaking finger mouthing ‘there was no other way’ and Peter skidded to an abrupt stop.

Oh.

Peter looked down at the oversized gauntlet resting in his hands and let his mask slide off his face to merge with the neck of his suit. Taking a quick look around him, Peter gave one final sniff and looked back at Dr. Strange, giving a firm and sure nod of understanding.

He knew what he had to do.

The stones glittered across the knuckles of the modified Iron Man gauntlet prettier than any precious gem Peter had ever seen and it took considerably more effort than he cared to admit to not allow himself to just be mystified by them. Peter adjusted his grip to hold the glove more firmly and began to slip it on, the armor automatically shifting to mold to his smaller hand.

“NO!” Peter huffed and felt a single tear leak from the corner of his eye, tickling his nostril as he ignored the agonized scream of his mentor. The gauntlet was half on. “PETER STOP!”

“I’m so sorry Mr. Stark,” he whispered as his fingers slid into place, the glove fully conforming and tightening around his hand.

The immediate pain was stunning and all encompassing and Peter threw his head back, eyes closed, with a grunt. He knees and muscles, already tired and overworked, turned into jelly and he just let himself drop, breath coming in short pants, hearing ringing and vision blurring and darkening around the edges. The hair on the back of his neck was standing on end, his Spidey sense screaming its final death rattle and giving up under the untenable onslaught. His very atoms felt like they were being ripped apart, blowing him apart and remaking him in the Stones image. He wanted to scream but he didn’t have the lung capacity to do much more than endure.

Finally – a second, a minute, a year, an eternity later, everything stabilized just enough for sound to filter back into him: repulsers rushing toward him, angry and desperate yelling from Thanos – barreling toward Peter in a last ditch effort to take the gauntlet for himself – gasps and moans from his own team and silence. Silence as the battle around him stopped and everyone turned to look at him with bated breath.

Using more strength and effort than he ever had before, Peter lifted his shaking right hand up to show the glowing gauntlet to everyone and forced his numb mouth into a lopsided smile – his eyes focused on Tony and only Tony’s terrified face as he said “I’m sorry,” and snapped his fingers.

“Where…?” Peter asked, looking around over the sunset covered lake and then down at his hands – whole and undamaged. He was dressed in his favorite science pun t-shirt, the one Uncle Ben had gotten him their last holiday together and he felt good. No aches and pain from the battle, his arms strong again. He made loose fists with both hands, clenching and relaxing his fingers in absolute wonder at just how good he felt – better than before he had ditched the bus to MOMA that morning (five years ago?) even.

“Hey Petey.”

At the sound of his voicePeter whipped around, already crying streams of silent tears, and wasted no time in rushing the short distance to fling himself into his Uncle’s open arms. “Ben,” he sobbed, embracing the man tightly, afraid he would disappear.

“I’m so proud of you buddy,” Ben whispered, his own tears mingling with Peter’s and returning the hug with equal force. “You’re the kindest, bravest person I’ve ever had the honor to know.”

“Am I dead?” Peter asked, resigned but not sad – he had accepted the possibility the second he put on the Gauntlet.

“Not really,” Ben answered, cryptic. “Somewhere in between would be the best way to describe it.” He stepped back, releasing his hold on Peter to hold him at arms length and grip his shoulders tightly the warm and comforting smile that Peter knew from his childhood on his face. “If you weren’t enhanced you definitely would be but you are so…” Peter just nodded in understanding, furiously wiping at the streams of tears still pouring down his face. “Regardless we don’t have much time.”

“I’m so sorry Ben,” Peter blurted, reaching up a hand to grip tightly onto Ben’s forearm. “I’m so sorry I didn’t stop it. I had my powers, I could have taken the bullet. I could have stopped it.”

Ben’s eyes were soft and his smile lines deepened as his lips twitched up into a sad smile, moving his hands from Peter’s shoulders to cup his face as gently as if he were made of glass. As if he were something precious. “Oh Pete its not your fault, it was never your fault. You were fourteen and staring down the barrel of a gun for the first time, I would have been more concerned if you didn’t freeze.” Ben told him, leaning forward to push their foreheads together, his hand cupping the back of Peter’s neck. “You’re my kid – it doesn’t matter about enhancements or powers – I’ll always put myself between you and danger. I don’t regret anything.”

Peter let out a hoarse sob that shook his frame and pulled Ben back in for another hug. “I love you,” he said fervently, trying to put as much force and emotion into it as he could. “I love you and I miss you and so does May.”

“I love you both so much,” Ben said, squeezing Peter one last time before releasing him and stepping away, water lapping at his ankles and rippling out to the horizon. “As nice as this visit as been Pete, I really hope I don’t see you again any time soon.”

Peter’s answering chuckle was watery will unshed tears, his vision already fading as Ben disappeared followed by the serene lake and sunset; the dusty battlefield snapping back into focus.

His body was numb in the way that promised pain if he could feel anything, his heartbeat stuttering and aching in his chest as Peter collapsed back against a pile of rocks and broken pieces of building. His body was limp and unable to support itself and his head lolled to rest on his undamaged left shoulder.

“Peter!” Tony’s devastated voice creeped in and Peter tried to smile but he couldn’t really tell if his muscles were responding, his eyesight was so dark. Gentle hands pulled him to rest against a warm body, lying his head in a more comfortable position and cupping to undamaged side of his face in a calloused palm. The grip was as careful as if he were made of glass and maybe he was. “Stay with me Pete, just stay with me okay?”

“Tony,” Peter rasped out, his voice broken and so so quiet, but it carried – the battlefield was a silent as a tomb beyond the heavy breathing of the surrounding Avengers. Peter had done it apparently.

His mentor let out a sob that he didn’t bother to disguise and ran his hands through Peter’s sweaty curls – it felt nice. “I’m so proud of you,” Tony said earnestly, echoing Ben and making Peter’s heart clench and skip a beat, his voice absolutely mangled with emotion. “You’re the absolute best of us and I’m so beyond proud of you buddy but I just need you to stay awake okay kiddo?”

“I’m tired,” Peter croaked, his eyes sinking closed against his will and only reopening due to Tony’s panicked jostling.

“I know kiddo, I know,” Tony choked out. “I’ll let you rest soon I promise but just humor me a little longer alright? A few more minutes for your old mentor huh?”

“Love you,” Peter said, forcing his voice to be as strong as possible even as his body sagged further and his heart rate slowed. “Tell May… Love her.” He was ready to rest. Peter’s left hand, barely gripping Tony’s with the very last of his strength, loosened and fell against his chest. His eyesight failed.

The last thing he heard was Tony, crying and begging him to stay.

————————————————

Part of Peter expected to be back in the lake or with Ben but instead he was met with only darkness.

It worked for him though to be honest. He could relax in the dark, let his mind wander and rest in equal measure, his worries gone and – for the first time in a long time – feeling no pain.

On occasion he thought he could hear voices whispering in the distance or see something bright far away but neither stayed long enough for him to investigate further. He still felt tired down to his bones and, as the time passed, his right side began to feel more and more like static and less numb, bright sparks of something like pain flaring through him like lightening and soon forgotten.

The light flickered – sometimes brighter sometimes nearly dimmed out – but seemed to get closer to more Peter looked at it and memories filtered in. Space, melting into dust, fighting with his childhood heroes, snapping, Ben… Tony… wanting to give up so bad but not doing it.

“Please wake up,” a broken voice whispered in the distance. “Please don’t die when I just got you back.”

Seconds, minutes, days, years later Peter opened eyelids that weighed a ton each to look around with blurry vision at the white room around him and the dark human-shaped spot next to him, his lips turning up just the smallest amount.

[witchymarvelspacecase]

Alternate Endgame

Summary: Fuck Endgame. Reader has precognitive abilities and we’re gonna fix this stupid movie.

Warnings: Cursing, endgame spoilers, maybe some tears?, fluff

WC: 4816

AN: It took me for-fucking-ever, and it is CRAZY long, but here it is.

Forever love to @writingwithadinosaur​ for CONTINUING to put up with my empty promises to write.

You woke with a start; heaving deep breaths that just couldn’t seem to fill your lungs. You were coated in a sheen of cold sweat. It had been months-- no, years since you'd had a premonition that strong, and you were more than a little shaken.

Not thinking you reached over for the man sleeping beside you, but your fingers only met cool sheets. Of course they did. It had been 5 years since Sam had… disappeared, he wouldn’t simply reappear in your bed because you’d had a vision. No matter how much you wanted him to. 

Before Thanos, Sam had been there for you. You’d started as teammates, then friends, then more. Sam was everything. He was sweet, funny, and loyal. The fact that he was gorgeous certainly didn’t hurt either. He’d helped you process your visions. He’d hold you, press kisses to your temple, and let you talk through what happened if you could. If you couldn’t he was more than up to distract you. God you missed him. You missed his touch, you missed his voice, missed the tiny birds he’d draw on your mirror, or mission paperwork, or the small bird figurines he’d hide throughout your room. It hurt even more intensely, waking from a vision after so long, and finding him still gone.

As moments passed, and your breathing became less panicked, your mind began to clear, and details of your vision slowly, but clearly came back. Pain, a lot of pain, and death. There was hope, you thought for a second that you’d heard Sam’s voice… but there was so much risk involved. And the deaths you saw… you couldn’t take anymore death.

FUCK no. You wouldn’t let it happen like that. No way.

Knowing that sleeping again would be impossible, you dragged yourself out of bed, intending to make coffee, but paused at your bedroom door. Turning abruptly, you walked instead to your closet. Reaching onto the top shelf, you pulled down a large zip top bag with a few of Sam’s sweatshirts inside. You pulled one out and quickly re-sealed the bag. Bringing the fabric to your face and inhaling the lingering scent of detergent, cologne, and Sam, had fresh tears springing in your eyes. But it also brought a sense of determination, and confidence. 

Sam was with you. He wasn’t gone permanently, and he believed in you. He loved you.

Pulling the sweatshirt over your PJs, you left your room with a new sense of purpose.

…

The Aether; the reality stone. One of 6 infinity stones that had enabled Thanos’s snap. It had been given to the collector many years ago, and it was your only hope. 

Of course, that was assuming that the rest of your team figured out the whole time travel thing. 

Exhaling, you shook your head in disbelief. Time travel. 

Aliens, gods, titans, and now time travel. 

Before Carol had brought Tony and Nebula back, time travel would have been as ridiculously out of reach as it sounded. But with Tony back? You could see time travel being a distinct possibility, and a quick one.

Tony was refusing to help, which hurt, but you understood. He didn’t want to risk losing his daughter. Given how life seemed to take from Tony, his resistance made sense. Were Morgan your daughter, you wouldn’t risk her either. 

Although, caution didn’t sit well with Tony Stark. You had a feeling he would be unable to keep himself from at least trying to work out time travel now that he had an idea. He would try, and probably tweak his equation until it functioned flawlessly.

Tony would figure it out. And when he did, he would feel obligated to help; he wouldn’t be able to keep the knowledge that the team needed away from them. That meant you needed to learn as much as you could about the Aether before Tony figured out time travel. If it were anyone else, you would have had plenty of time.

Your original plan, to ask Thor, was a non-starter. The god of thunder had been through the fucking ringer. Honestly, you were shocked he was doing as well as he was. As soon as you could, you planned to sit with him awhile. Nothing invasive, but you got the feeling he wanted to talk, but didn’t know where to start.

Dr. Banner was able to fill in some blanks for you, but not enough.

Thankfully, once you were able to contact him, Wong was a veritable treasure trove of information. He was able to walk you through the process of using an infinity stone, being that he was the only one left alive who had done so in the past. Or, almost the only one.

“Rocket,” you called. The small creature had been across the room, talking to Thor, but came over as you waved him to you. “I need your help.” 

“With what?” he seemed genuinely curious, and then a little taken aback when you began to explain.

“I’m not sure you’ve been told what I can do,” you began. When Rocket shook his head, you explained your premonitions.

“And these visions are always accurate?” he asked, his furry little face serious.

“Yes. The visions are accurate, but meant as a warning. So far, when I have interfered, the future has been altered, and whatever I’d seen could be avoided.” Then, you proceeded to tell him about the future you’d seen in your most recent vision. “I can’t- I won’t lose any more of my family, Rocket. This plan I have, I- it will work, but I need your help.” Your expression was beseeching.

The raccoon didn’t ponder long though. “What’d’ya need?”

“I need you to tell me as much as you can remember about when Quill held the infinity stone, and when we have to go and retrieve the fucking things, I need you to help me get a specific one.”

Luckily, Rocket was willing to trust you. Something told you he didn’t trust easily, especially not when what you were telling him couldn’t be proven one way or another, but he’d lost a lot of people too. It seemed he was ready to take a chance.

When it came time to be split into groups to collect the stones, Rocket helped to ensure you were on the team with him and Thor, headed to Asgard.

Next step. Rock climbing practice, a lot of it.

…

“Bruce, I need a favor.” You crossed your fingers, hoping he didn’t ask too many questions regarding your request. 

Though Rocket knew a good portion of your plan, he didn’t know all of it. The fewer people who knew, the better. It wasn’t easy to convince Bruce to give you the extra pym particle. You’d stopped Scott from accidentally using one up, so there was one left, but Bruce was hesitant to give it to you. It wasn’t until your eyes began to water and your voice began to crack that Bruce caved; he couldn’t handle tears. Though you hadn’t planned to cry, it had worked in your favor. 

Actually, the hard part was getting Bruce to keep his mouth shut about you having the extra particle. Bruce had a hard time lying to anyone. You needed everyone as in the dark as possible, especially Clint and Natasha, or your plan wouldn’t work.

…

“See you in a minute,” Natasha said with a smile. You gave a smile back, hoping it didn’t appear strained and took a deep breath before “jumping” to Asgard, ten years in the past.

Thor was thoroughly distracted, with good reason, so it was a good thing you had Rocket on your side.

“I hope you know what you’re doin’,” Rocket grumbled as you took the carefully contained Aether from him.

“You and me both,” you replied quietly. 

“Good luck.”

You gave him a small smile before triggering your suit.

…

You appeared just far enough back that Nat and Clint didn’t hear you, but close enough that you could see them heading up one side of the mountain. They headed up the side that was clearly meant to be climbed, you however, went to the opposite side; a sheer rock face with a drop from an unbelievable height.

You’d received an odd look from Tony when you’d asked for a part of Peter Parker’s Spiderman suit. He’d given the gloves to you without asking the question that was clearly on the tip of his tongue, but you knew there would be many questions later as a result. The gloves’ grip wasn’t nearly as strong as it would have been for Peter, but they would be much better than nothing. Your other tools had been easy to obtain and stuff in a backpack; a combination ice axe and climbing hammer, pitons, carabiners and high strength climbing rope. Hopefully, the practice you’d managed would be enough.

Taking a deep breath you reached up and began your ascent. You needed to get as far up as you could and quickly, so that you could be in place and relatively stable when you needed to use the stone. 

You forced the pitons into the rock face and secured yourself, freeing your hands and arms to use the stone, and more importantly, catch Natasha. The two tasks had to be done simultaneously, or your plan wouldn’t work. 

Vormir’s guardian, and Clint needed to see Natasha fall, and believe she was dead in order to free the soul stone, but Natasha couldn’t die.

It felt like no fucking time had passed between when you finally anchored yourself and you could hear Nat and Clint arguing. 

“Showtime.”

Using the stone, you warped reality around yourself not a moment too soon, as Natasha was suddenly hanging just above you.

“Damn you!” Clint shouted. Natasha had clipped him to an anchor she’d shot into the cliff, saving him, and now she was dangling from his outstretched arm.

“Let me go,” she said, almost calmly. 

You knew in her mind, she was doing the right thing. Knew she was decided, resolved.

“No, please no,” Clint was crying. This would destroy him.

“It’s okay,” Natasha soothed ineffectively.

“Please-” Clint begged, but Natasha kicked off the cliff, forcing Clint to lose his grip.

For a moment, it felt like everything froze, then you blinked and reality seemed to split in front of you. You could see what you’d created for Clint and the guardian to see, but you could also see Natasha hanging safely from the second piton you’d secured just to the side of you. 

“What the-” she broke off, seeing the distorted reality of herself falling to her death. When you reached over and touched her shoulder, her head whipped around, suddenly able to see you and the reality stone.

“What the fuck-” You silenced her with a finger to your lips. You weren’t sure whether or not you could be heard by Clint or the guardian. Waiting just a few seconds until you saw Clint disappear, you released the control you had on the stone and gestured for Natasha to trigger her suit to return home.

She looked like she really wanted to argue, but she did as you asked.

Clint’s knees hit the floor and he almost dropped the soul stone when he turned and saw Natasha standing beside him. Tears were flowing down his face and all sorts of nasty curses in a multitude of languages flew from his lips. 

“Don’t you ever fucking do something like that again! Do you hear me, Tasha?! Fuck! You can’t give your life for mine. What the fuck were you- how did you-” Clint cut off and pulled Nat into a tight hug.

“I can’t promise never to do something like that again, Clint. I don’t know what happened. I thought-”. Natasha cut off too, tears in her eyes. She had been resolved to die to save Clint and the others, but she was glad she hadn’t had to.

“What exactly happened?” Bruce asked, looking from Nat and Clint to you. 

“What?” Clint asked, looking from Nat to you.

“Ask them. I sure as fuck didn’t know what was happening,” Natasha said on a long exhale.

You noticed Rocket and Tony were also looking your way. When Nat pulled far enough away from Clint to face you, they both looked at you too.

All eyes on you. Great.

“Well, I had a vision…”

You explained part of your vision. To be fair, you would have explained the whole thing, you wanted to, but there was a niggling feeling at the back of your mind telling you that you weren’t done. You couldn’t tell everyone. It sucked, but your friends-- your family would understand. When it all worked out, you would tell them, but not yet.

…

The final tweaks were made to the new gauntlet. You watched as Tony, Rocket, and Bruce hovered around the thing, clearly unsure if it was ready.

But you were only barely watching. As Tony’s attention was drawn away, you drew over to his latest Iron Man suit. You’d talked with Rocket, and had some idea the power the stones would put out, with that in mind…

“FRIDAY, could I bother you for a moment?” you asked politely.

“Of course. What can I do for you?”

…

Not a fucking moment after Bruce snapped his fingers and the compound was totaled. Most of the structure was underground, along with several of the team.

Shit. 

The worst part of having premonitions was that you couldn’t see everything. The visions  would scare the shit out of you, and give you just enough information to run on, but never the whole picture. Thus, you found yourself running with Clint and Natasha through an underground maze of destruction trying to avoid the fucked up alien hoard that was chasing you. 

ANY of that information would have been nice to know ahead of time.

It also would have been nice to know that a past version of Nebula was somehow in the present. 

Fortunately that problem was “solved” when present nebula showed up and shot her past self… God you couldn’t wrap your head around all this shit. 

A fight was underway as you cleared the tunnels, and it did not look good for your side. Although you noticed with a little shock, that Steve was holding Mjolnir. Or he was until Thanos knocked it from his hand, and cracked his shield. 

All you could see then was Steve, barely standing, alone, facing an army increasing in size. Your heart was racing. You knew Steve wouldn’t give in. You hadn’t seen him die, but that didn’t mean his life wasn’t at risk. Fuck! What were you going to do?!

Then a voice you hadn’t heard in years crackled over the comms, “Hey, Cap, you read me? Cap, it's Sam. Can you hear me?” and a glowing yellow portal appeared next to Steve. “On your left.”

Seeing Sam, in his Falcon suit, fly through the portal, you almost hit the ground.

“Sam,” you whispered, tears in your eyes, but a growing smile on your face.

“Hey babe, miss me?” You could hear the smirk on his face, and though it would have bothered you before, it made you laugh now. 

Your team had a chance. Hundreds of portals opened and thousands of people poured from them. You could vaguely hear chanting from the Wakandans, and see glowing shields being formed by the masters of the mystic arts. New hope and resolve formed in your chest.

“Every fucking day, Sam. Now let's end this so I can yell at you for disappearing on me.” He laughed, and you both ran into the hoards of Thanos’ followers.

…

Unfortunately, though the reinforcements were amazing, and desperately needed, Thanos and his army weren’t backing down.

Carol powered through ships, and struggled with Thanos, but she couldn't overpower him. When you saw her fall, and Tony began approaching the giant murder grape, you recognized your time to act.

“Carol,” you called as she rose, shaking debris from her hair. When she met your eyes, you waved her over. During the fight, you’d managed to speak to Thor, Dr. Strange and Wanda. They all knew you had a plan, though Strange seemed dubious, and they had all agreed to help. The fact that you’d managed to corral them all was a fucking miracle in and of itself, but what you were about to do, was still gonna be difficult.

Your group managed to stay out of Tony’s field of vision. What he was about to attempt, had to happen. What you needed was to reach him in time to alter the aftereffects. 

“I am– inevitable,” Thanos announces, snapping his fingers, which would have been gut wrenching, had the mad titan actually had the infinity stones in his gauntlet.

However, unbeknownst to him, Tony Stark had swiped them right out of his hands. Tony Stark, who was now pulsing with immense amounts of gamma radiation and pure power from the ancient relics.

“And I– am– Iron Man.” Tony snapped his fingers. That was your cue. You, and the most powerful teammates you had, reached out, and took Tony’s left hand. Power and pain radiated through your body. And that was all you remembered.

…

The rocky ground beneath you was not comfortable, but you were barely aware of the sharp stones digging into your back since your whole body felt like you’d been in a car accident.

“Fucking ow,” you groaned.

“Well what did you expect? Trying to divert that level of radiation; you’re lucky your crazy stunt didn’t kill you!” Dr. Strange was in full lecture mode it seemed. You could hear Thor and Carol talking just behind you, and when you cracked your eyes open, you caught a glimpse of Wanda’s magic trailing behind her. Your eyelids felt like there were hundred pound weights on them. Why couldn’t you keep them open? 

Wait! 

It took a full second and a half for your brain to re-engage; quickly recapping the past few days. You bolted into an upright sitting position, all but shrieking in pain as your gritty eyes frantically searched for one figure amidst hundreds.

“Hey kid, you gonna explain all this to me now? I don’t like being in the dark.” You looked directly behind you and burst into tears. Tony was looking at you with a slightly exasperated look on his face, belayed by the small smile on his lips.

“It worked,” you sobbed.

“I don’t know what all has been going on in this place, but I know you’re not supposed to be upset that we won,” came Sam’s voice. He walked up behind Tony, clapping him on the back as he stepped past him to crouch down beside you. “Hey, Gorgeous. I missed you.”

A wet laugh exploded from your chest, “I fucking missed you too, Sammy.” Your eyes overflowed and your smile wobbled as he rested his forehead on yours. 

“It’s okay. I’m here. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere. I love you,” he soothed, cupping the side of your face and rubbing across your cheekbone with his thumb. He was home. Sobs shook you, and you knew it would be a while before you were able to stand. Or it would have been if Sam hadn’t picked you up and insisted on carrying you.

He didn’t let you out of his sight for several days.

…

It was actually weeks later, after some of the rubble had been cleared from where the compound once stood, before you finally explained what had happened. 

Not everyone was able to cram into Tony’s living room, so some people; Dr. Strange, and King T’challa and his people were there via remote communication. Rocket had even rigged up some sort of communications device into the Guardian’s ship so they could hear too.

“I had a vision,” you started. You were sitting in Sam’s lap, across from most of your family. Natasha sat in an armchair, with Clint perched on the arm. They’d both gone home to see his family almost immediately after the fight, but they both insisted on hearing what had happened.

Scott and Hope shared a couch. Bruce stood just behind it. 

Steve and Bucky were standing next to each other just to the side of you and Sam. They weren’t standing beside you, they wanted an explanation just as much as the others, but the two men were close with Sam, so it seemed they wanted to show that they supported you, as his girlfriend.

Tony was in an armchair across from Natasha and Clint. Thor stood behind his chair, and Wanda sat on the floor between the couch and Tony’s armchair. Even Carol was there, she sat backwards on a kitchen chair that she’d dragged into the room.

“We figured as much,” Tony replied. He smiled as his daughter ran into the room and all but threw herself onto Tony’s lap. He picked her up and situated her comfortably before continuing. “What exactly did your vision show.”

“For the most part, I saw just what happened. I saw you figure out the time travel thing. I saw us split into teams to get the stones. That's where I intervened,” you paused. Sam gave your hip a gentle, supportive squeeze. You hadn’t told him what you’d seen yet, but he knew you. Knew you were trying to say something that had gone horribly wrong. 

“I asked Bruce for the extra Pym charge, and I asked Rocket for some information, and to help me get on the team that went to Asgard.”

You saw Thor straighten then. He’d begun to take care of himself again, though you knew he was still overwhelmingly sad and lonely, he seemed to be working his way out of the deep rut he’d been in. “I don’t recall actually getting the stone. I was too distracted by my- my mother. Rocket did not show me the stone either. I just assumed he had it.” Thor looked at you, an unidentifiable emotion on his face. “Why did you need to be on our team?”

“I needed the reality stone. Wong and Rocket helped me get an idea of how to use it. And then I needed the extra Pym charge to take me to Vormir.”

Natasha’s brow furrowed. “I was supposed to die, wasn’t I?” she asked calmly. Clint stiffened beside her.

“No, you died in my vision. You weren’t supposed to die. That’s why I fixed it,” you gave her a look that brooked no argument, and she smiled in return.

“I used the stone to make it look like Natasha had died. Clint and Vormir’s guardian had to believe that it had happened. The only way to get the stone was-” 

“To lose what you loved,” Clint finished for you. You nodded. “I had to believe it or it wouldn’t have worked.” You nodded again, though he hadn’t phrased it as a question.

“I’m really sorry you had to see that, Clint, but it was the only way I could think to make it work.” You really were sorry. You knew Clint sometimes woke from horrible nightmares, occasionally about his family disappearing again, but also about seeing Nat fall.

He shook his head, and you let the subject lie.

“No wonder you were so fucked up when we all got back,” Steve said quietly to Clint. Then he turned to you. “That’s not it, is it?”

“No.” You looked to Tony.

“The suit wouldn’t have held that much power,” Tony concluded. “I didn’t think it would, but I didn’t have the time to strengthen it. I just didn’t know-”

“I know,” you said. “I had FRIDAY make some tweaks when you weren’t looking.” If it was possible to look proud and affronted at the same time, that’s how you would have described Tony’s expression. “Then, using the info I’d gotten from Rocket, I figured out how to displace the power, instead of letting it hit you alone.” You nodded at Carol, Thor, and Wanda. “I pulled the strongest people I knew, and lined us all up behind you before grabbing your shoulder just as you used the stones. The power was distributed to all of us, and we were able to hold, and diffuse it with no ill effects. I don't think it’s something anyone could have thought to do in the moment, it only happened because I had that vision.” You looked at Nat and Tony again. “After all we’ve been through, I couldn’t live in a world without you guys. Any of you,” you added, looking at everyone.

Tony had his arm wrapped tight around Morgan. And you heard a muffled sob from just behind you, turning a little, you saw Pepper. You winced, you hadn’t intended her to hear this. She saw your expression and shook her head. “Thank you,” she mouthed before walking to Tony’s side. She gave him a kiss and held his free hand in a death grip.

Clint had a grip on Nat’s hand too. White lines formed at the corners of Thor’s mouth, and Wanda looked like she was having trouble processing all the emotions in the room, but her eyes focused on you. 

“Why didn’t you tell us all this?” Bruce asked; he’d been quiet the whole time, though he’d known you had something going on earlier than most.

“I was afraid that if I said something, it would change something. I had no clue what was safe and what wasn’t and I knew-” you cut off, shifting to grip Sam’s hand, clearing your throat. “I knew if everything happened as it should, the dusted people would come back. I couldn’t risk that getting fucked up, just like I couldn’t let what I saw happen to Tony and Nat.” You squeezed Sam’s hand. “I’m sorry I kept this from you all, but I really couldn't risk it.” You closed your eyes, tilting your face to look at the floor.

You heard someone approaching, and felt Sam shift, but you didn’t open your eyes until you felt a hand on your shoulder. Natasha stood in front of you. As you looked up at her, you heard another set of footsteps approach. Tony appeared behind her. Steadily, your whole family came close. Natasha pulled you up, and into a tight hug. You felt Sam rise from behind you, he kept a hand on your hip. Tony put a hand on your shoulder, squeezing. Steve gripped your other shoulder. Bruce had a hand on one of your arms, which were around Natasha, and Clint gripped your hand. Looking around the room at the others, you saw pain, and gratitude in every face. 

“Don’t keep shit like that to yourself again, you hear me?” Natasha grumbled, tears in her voice keeping her tone from being very threatening.

You let out a choked laugh. “I’ll do my best.”

“Clearly your best is damn good. I’ll take that any day,” Tony said. Tears were in his eyes, and there were tracks of them on his cheeks. “You did a good job, kid.”

“We’re proud of you.” Steve gave you a smile. Clint met your gaze and though his eyes were still warry, he gave you a smile, squeezing your hand.

Sam’s hand ran up and down your lower back as Natasha and the others stepped back. “You’re amazing, baby. You did good, just like always.” He wrapped his arm around you from behind and pressed a kiss to your temple. 

Everyone settled back into their seats before Steve spoke again. “Is that all you changed? Nothing else we need to know.”

You laughed a little, drawing everyone's gazes again. “Well I did change one more thing, it wasn’t big though.”

“What was it?” Steve asked. 

“I kept Scott from accidentally using a Pym Particle when he was talking about how they worked. That was the only way I could have one to use.”

Hope rolled her eyes, “seriously, Scott?” Clearly she was well aware of Scott’s inability to be smooth.

Scott’s face was beet red, but laughter filled the room. It seemed that the group would be able to move on from the news after all.

“I wasn’t gonna use it!” Scott insisted.

“If you had to be stopped, then yes, you were going to use it,” Hope argued, rolling her eyes. “You’re hopeless.”

The room filled with laughter and you felt a weight lift off your shoulders. Leaning back into Sam, you let a long sigh escape you. It was over. The world was readjusting to having its missing members back, and after 5 years, you knew it would take a while, but, looking around the room, you had hope for the future.

You had your family after all. Your family, and your Sam. Everything was as it should be.

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[yelena-bellova]

Please Let Me Love You: Steve Rogers x Reader

Plot: Reader and Steve have loved each other for years, but the Reader’s insecurities and grief could kill their chances of it ever happening.

Prompt: “Please let me love you”
“No, I’ll only end up breaking your heart”
”What if I’m okay with that?”

Warnings: Language, grief, steamy situations (no smut)

Word Count: 3.8k

A/N: It’s been a while since I’ve written for Steve so I might be a little rusty. I’m also shit at writing steam so my apologies LOL This was done for @hopingforbarnes writing challenge, go check out the other works that were part of it! (Also, sorry for no ‘read more’ for some reason my phone won’t let me add it 🙄 Enjoy!

*gif is not mine but if it’s yours let me know so I can credit you*

———————

It was one of those nights.

I sat in the living room of the compound, wrapped in a thick blanket on the couch. The cable box’s clock said it was 3AM, sleep definitely wasn’t my friend tonight. I’d tossed and turned for an hour before my body finally gave in, only to be woken up a few hours later by a nightmare. I was back in Wakanda watching Thor slide his axe into Thanos’ deep chest, hearing the titan’s cries of pain. I watched as he snapped his fingers and disappeared into whatever portal he’d suddenly created. But the worst part was watching my teammates disappear again. I saw Bucky drop to his knees and dissolve, I grabbed Wanda’s ashes in my hands, I cried Sam’s name as I searched the forest for him. Then I woke up, clutching the sheets in my hand and letting my tears fall.

I sipped at my glass of whiskey, Tony had curated an amazing selection of alcohol and he’d left it at the compound when he’d retired. Times like these were when I wished he was still here. If I was being honest, I was fairly jealous of him. He’d walked away. Wiped his hands of all responsibility, married Pepper and built a new life for himself. It sounded nice, but I knew that my opportunity to have it had long passed.

“Trouble sleeping?”

I turned my head quickly to see Steve walking out of the elevator towards me.

“No,” I replied dryly, “I just really enjoy the enthralling nightlife.”

He smirked and made his way over, sitting in a chair a few feet away from me. Steve was no stranger to nightmares and he’d been trying to help me deal with mine for years. He’d come into my room when he heard me screaming and would stay with me until I calmed down. He’d whisper reassurances that I was safe and that he was there for me. And the terrible part was, I loved it. Even worse, I needed him.

“I didn’t hear you scream or else I would have come in.” Steve said quietly, watching me stare at the contents of my glass.

“Tonight was an anomaly, I simply woke up crying,” I said, not daring to look him in the eyes. It was too dangerous...

“You still could have woken me up, I wouldn’t have minded.”

“Yeah, well, I’ve got to be a big girl and deal with my own issues at some point.” I responded before emptying the last bit of whiskey into my mouth, savoring the burn.

Steve leaned forward and propped his elbows on his knees, “It’s not a weakness to need help, y/n.”

I chuckled humorlessly, “Steve, I can’t run to you every time I have a nightmare forever.”

“Yes, you can,” he replied softly, “You could wake me up every night and I would still come running to help you, to hold you, whatever you needed.”

I finally met his gaze, his stare so intense I felt like he could see right through me. And I hated that. I hated the feeling of vulnerability and someone being able to tear down the walls I worked so hard to put up. Steve was the only person who had knocked down practically every single one without me even realizing.

“It’s not your job to save me, Captain. I think I’m a little beyond saving. Maybe you should spend your time helping people who can be helped.”

Steve didn’t budge at my sharp rejection, he simply drew a deep breath and said, “You can keep trying to push me away but it’s not going to work. I’m not going to abandon you to deal with this on your own.”

Tears flooded my eyes at his words, knowing the meaning behind them. We’d never actually talked about it but we both knew there was something there. The whole team, when there had been a whole team, knew it too. We were teased mercilessly about it. It didn’t seem to be a secret that Steve and I basically belonged to each other, but never officially. But things had changed in the past few years. It wasn’t as simple as it would’ve been pre-Accords and certainly not Pre-Snap. The only thing that had stayed the same throughout all the shit we’d been through was Steve’s devotion to me.

Steve left his seat and kneeled down at my legs, resting his hand gently on my knee,

“Y/n...” his tone was desperate, “Please let me love you.”

I let the whiskey glass fall in my lap and turned my face away from Steve. My dam was breaking and I feared one more word that I didn’t deserve would cause it to crack and flood the entire room.

“No, I’ll only end up breaking your heart.” I whispered, the lump in my throat making it impossible to speak at a higher volume.

Steve’s thumb traced the curve of my knee, “What if I’m okay with that?”

There it was.

The dam broke.

“No!” I exclaimed as I threw the blanket off my torso and stood to my feet. The whiskey glass rolled across the floor and I walked in the opposite direction. I turned to Steve with tears streaming down my cheeks,
“Steve, I can’t do this! I’m not the girl for you, no matter how much I want to be. I’m so fucked up from the past few years I don’t even recognize myself when I look in the mirror. I’m so far from who I was when we met and it breaks my heart. I’m so fucking damaged that there is no way in hell I could love you way you deserve to be loved. You deserve so much better than someone who wakes up every night screaming and can’t get out of bed most days or someone who gets drunk to try and make themselves forget.”

My vision was clouded from the tears but I could see the broken expression on Steve’s face. I’d only seen that look once, when he sat in the Wakandan soil holding his best friend’s ashes. The fact that I was the one causing him that pain made me feel like a piece of shit. Yet for some reason, I continued…

“We had our chance and we didn’t take it, we can’t go back and change the past, Steve.” I said with a quiet sniffle, I was breaking my own heart along with Steve’s.

Steve opened his mouth to say something, but closed it a second later and began to leave the room. I watched him walk to the elevator, his posture resembling a man who’d just lost in battle. Before the doors closed, he turned to me,

“I don’t care if you’re not the same person you used to be, I’m always going to love you. Every single version of you.”

Then the doors closed and he was gone.

It didn’t take long for me to sink to the floor and start sobbing. Here I was trying to protect us both and yet I felt like I’d just made the biggest mistake of my life. This wasn’t some random guy I’d met at a coffee shop, this was Steve. Steve. I’d never wanted to be with someone like I’d wanted to be with him. Memories began to flood my mind of the moments that caused me to fall in love with him, each one more painful than the last. But the worst one had happened three years ago, only a few days before Bruce had called telling us Vision was in danger.

——

“Why the hell did you do that, Rogers?” I exclaimed, my voice echoing in the nearly empty safe house we were currently staying in. Sam and I had dragged Steve out of the battle we’d just been in, Natasha covering us. We’d carried all 200 pounds of muscle back to the house and he was currently laid out in front of me on a cot. Sam and Nat were doing routine perimeter checks while I was in charge of taking care of Steve’s wound.

“What was I supposed to do?” Steve asked through gritted teeth as I began removing his armor, “Let you get shot?”

“Yes! I didn’t ask you to jump in front of me!” I replied, throwing the top layer to the side and beginning to cautiously peel away the tee shirt underneath. Steve hissed as fresh air hit the bullet wound, once his abdomen was exposed I grabbed the nearby first ad kit.

Steve didn’t reply to my last comment, he simply let me work. Though he may have been a super soldier, he still very much felt pain. As I sterilized the wound and located the bullet, he let out a groan and I mumbled an apology. Thankfully, the bullet hadn’t hit any major organs so he wouldn’t need surgery. Thank God, because I wasn’t ready to perform a medical procedure in a glorified cabin in the middle of Romania’s forests.

I removed the bullet easily, only getting a moan from Steve, I could tell his accelerated healing was already kicking in. I still needed to stitch him up and to do that, I needed to be at a different angle.

“Sorry to make this awkward but, uh…” I said while looking from Steve’s face to his lap.

“No, it’s fine.” he responded passively, I had a feeling he was too exhausted to care.

I nodded and stood up, then carefully lowered myself into his lap. This was beyond awkward, for me at least. I’d never told Steve how I felt about him and here I was sitting on his crotch while he was shirtless. There were thoughts running through my head that were making me blush and I just prayed he didn’t notice it. Regaining my focus I took the bloodied gauze pad off his wound and grabbed the needle and thread in the kit.

“This part usually sucks, hold onto me if you need to, kay?” I said softly, he nodded in response. If the bullet removal hadn’t caused him to scream, he’d be fine with a few stitches.

As soon as the needle pierced his skin, his hand flew to my waist. It took every ounce of concentration I had to keep my mind on the task at hand rather than how I could feel the warmth of his palm through my suit. I pulled the first stitch through and he moaned slightly, squeezing my hip softly. I inhaled sharply and froze for half a second at the sensation, he was making it harder and harder to focus. As I willed myself to continue, I got through the next one without any movement from Steve. Once I was placing the third out of four, he hissed slightly and his other hand found it’s way to my other hip gripping it tightly. I gasped softly, but Steve didn’t seem to notice it, his eyes were closed. I was embarrassed at how much his simple touch affected me and didn’t need him knowing.

“Last one,” I whispered shakily, he looked through his eyelashes to meet my gaze and nodded.

I placed the last one quickly, Steve’s palms burned through the fabric of my suit as he squeezed my waist one final time. As soon as I was done I dropped the needle back in the kit and let my hands drop, my breathing had picked up without me even realizing it. I quickly remembered I needed to bandage the wound, which would require us to strike an even more intimate position.

Without meeting his eyes, I said, “I need to wrap the wound so you’re going to need to s-sit up.”

Steve was catching his breath, from what I didn’t know, and nodded silently. I knew he’d need help so as he removed his hands from my waist to brace himself on the cot, I placed my hands on his shoulders to bring him up. He groaned as he sat up, not only the wound hurting but his muscles undoubtably sore as well. I quickly grabbed the large gauze pad and folded it, holding it to the freshly stitched wound. I reached also for the tape that would wrap around his torso and hold the gauze in place. Pressing it gently, I began to wrap the tape around Steve, reaching behind him with one hand and keeping the other pressed to his abdomen. His muscles tensed under my touch before relaxing after, his hands snaking up to my sides, higher than they’d previously been. We were practically face to face so I tried to keep my composure but damn, he was making it hard. I continued wrapping until satisfied with my work, I placed a clip to hold it in place and dropped the remainders in the kit.

Neither of us said anything, we simply sat there with Steve holding me firmly in place and our eyes finally meeting. The danger had passed, we were safe, and I now had time to process what had placed us in this situation.

“Why’d you take that bullet for me?” I asked hesitantly, my voice no higher than a whisper.

His hands found their way back to my hips, his gaze somehow both gentle and intense. Goosebumps flooded my skin between the two sensations of touch and sight.

“I wasn’t about to let you die,” Steve said, his chest rumbling from the deep tone of his voice. I could feel his thumb tracing my hip bone and it sent a chill up my spine, this time I knew he noticed. His lips quirked ever so slightly, he could tell he was having an effect on me. My hands went to his shoulders and gripped them tightly as if to anchor myself to him. Steve moved so his arms were enveloping my waist and puling me closer to him.

My breath caught in my throat at the movement, my lips parted as I held Steve’s stare.

“I-I’m not even sure how to thank you.” I replied softly, shifting slightly in his lap causing him to let out a small whimper. Now it was my turn for ny lips to curl a little, realizing that I had just as much of an effect on him.

Steve shook his head gently, our foreheads nearly touching, “No thanks necessary, sweetheart.”

We were both a little touch starved and we both knew there’d been tension between us for years. That was a recipe for either disaster or something delicious, and I wanted nothing more than to find out which one it was. I let my fingers gently run down Steve’s biceps before resting there, causing him to bite his lip and hold me tighter. He pressed our foreheads together, our noses touching and our lips a mere inch or two away from meeting. As much as I wanted to make the next move, I could have stayed in the moment for much longer, simply savoring the electricity. One of Steve’s hands dragged up to my back and splayed out across it as if he was trying to press me as close to him as he could. But to get any closer, we’d have to cross a line.

As our breaths mingled, I knew that it was the moment I’d been waiting for for years. I was going to tell Steve that I loved him. The man had taken a fucking bullet for me, plus with our current position I was pretty confident in my chances of him returning the sentiment.

I pulled away to look at him, his pupils blown and his expression soft, “Steve, I-“

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

Natasha and Sam were back.

The moment was gone.

—

I wiped my eyes as I sat on the floor, leaned up against the couch. The tears were finally beginning to slow, but that didn’t mean the sadness had. Steve and I hadn’t spoken of that day and we hadn’t had another one resembling it. My skin tingled at the memories of Steve’s touch, how close we had come to getting everything we wanted. I’d wished so many times to go back to that moment and have Natasha and Sam stay out a few minutes more. All I needed was thirty seconds. All I needed was a chance.

A chance Steve had just given me.

I ran my hands through my hair, how fucking stupid was I? He was standing in front of me saying that he’d take me however I am. He wanted to love me, broken as I was, he still loved me in my damaged state. We’d done this dance for years, we’d come so close before and here I was ready to throw everything away brcause I was stuck in my own grief. I had a shot at happiness, at love, at feeling alive again. I had a shot with the man I’d been in love with for a decade.

And I wasn’t going to miss it.

I sprang to my feet and crossed the room to the elevator, a purpose in each of my steps. I pressed the button to the living quarters and shot up the short distance before the doors opened. Remembering Natasha was only a few rooms down from me and Steve, I realized I couldn’t be as loud in my confession as I felt. Nerves hit when I was only a few steps from Steve’s door. What if I’d already missed my chance downstairs when I’d been so cruel? What if I was about to make a complete fool out of myself? As my fist rested an inch away from the door, I almost pulled away and retired to my room.

No, I had to try at least.

I tapped the door softly and held my breath, I hadn’t even planned out what I’d wanted to say. There was no time to think as Steve opened the door quietly, his eyes widening a little at the sight of me. He definitely hadn’t expected to see me again tonight. I stood there awkwardly rubbing my hands together trying to think of the right thing to say. How was I supposed to convey ten years of loving someone into the small window I had? I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. God bless Steve, he stood there patiently waiting for me to be ready.

One of my favorite things about our friendship was that Steve and I had always been able to communicate with each others eyes. It had served us well in battle, on team game nights but I needed it to serve me well now more than ever. I needed him to see every ounce of love and longing I had for him in one simple look. His lips parted while I stared at him as if he could read my mind, his own eyes coming alight.

He pulled me to him so fast I barely had time to register our lips meeting.

I winded my arms around Steve’s neck as I drank in the moment, trying to get as close to him as I could. Both of his hands gripped my back, holding me as if I was about to disappear. Our lips moved together frantically, we were trying to make up for ten years of lost time. He pulled me into his room and I kicked the door shut, never breaking the kiss or losing contact. Steve’s hands slid down to my hips, squeezing ever so slightly and causing a moan to escape me. He was spurred on further now, running his hands down my sides to hit my thighs and lift me up. I quickly wrapped my legs around his waist as he walked us towards his bed, sitting down on the edge. Steve’s lips broke from mine to attach at my jawline to press featherlight kisses, I let out a soft groan and tangled one of my hands in the hair at the nape of his neck. These were the lines I’d longed to cross three years ago in that safe house, this is how I’d wanted that story to end. Steve’s ministrations moved down my neck, kissing and sucking at spots that made me moan louder. He was chasing my pleasure as if it was his own and it only added to what I felt for him in the moment.

Once he reached my shoulder, his lips ghosted over my skin and he chuckled. I pulled away, my chest heaving, hoping he wasn’t beginning to regret our actions.

“Are you okay?” I whispered through my pants.

He nodded, his forehead pressed against my skin, “I just never thought I’d get to hold you like this again.”

There it was, the exact moment where my heart burst with affection for Steven Grant Rogers when I thought it was impossible. Only he could cause such a heated moment only to make it the sweetest.

He pulled his head back to look at me, his lips swollen, his hair messy and his eyes lit up. He’d never looked more beautiful and he’d never looked more at ease. I wanted nothing more than to love him the way he deserved and beyond.

I moved my hands to his cheeks, “I love you so much, Steve. Please tell me I didn’t fuck this up.”

He stared at me with lips parted and a lopsided grin, “Sweetheart, I think we’ve both fucked this up enough over the past ten years. You getting upset one time isn’t going to scare me off.”

I smirked, “Language, Captain.”

Steve laughed lightly before pressing a kiss to the inside of my palm,

“Promise me,” he said softly, his eyes closed as he left more kisses in my hand, “Promise me you won’t leave, not just tonight.”

My heart broke at the fact that my insecurities and inability to deal with my emotions had caused him so much pain. He’d been waiting years for me to come out of my hole of grief, just hoping for a moment like the one we were in the midst of. I wanted to make up for every missed chance and lost opportunity we’d seen.

“I’m not leaving,” I said, pressing our foreheads together and dragging Steve’s hand to my chest to rest over my heart, “You’re stuck with me, Rogers.”

“Not a bad proposition if you ask me,” he grinned, tracing his thumb across the neckline of my tank top, “I love you so much.”

I smiled, tracing a finger over his lower lip, “I love you too.”

He connected our lips again, this time softer than when I’d entered the room. For the first time in a long time, everything felt right in the world. I knew outside the compound, the world was still on fire. In the morning we’d have to worry about missions and doing what we could to help rebuild but for now? For right now, all Steve and I had to do was make up for ten years of lost time.

[libsterslobsters]

When the Levee Breaks...

Summary: It's been three months since The Snap. The reader has a lot to cope with: newly-aquired super soldier capabilities, being a stranger in a strange place, and most of all, the loss of Bucky. But lucky for her, Steve Rogers isn't one to let his friends go through hard times alone.

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x fem!enhanced! Reader (mentioned), Steve Rogers x fem!enhanced! Reader (platonic)

Reader has the ability to see bits of the future, understand all languages, and process information quickly as well as being a super soldier

Warnings: angst, self-destruct behavior, mentions of suicidal tendencies, mentions of mental illness, mentions of eating disorder, tiny bit of fluff.

___________________________________________

“Some times I feel I’ve got to run away, I’ve got to run away…” Her footfalls are too fast to keep in step with the song’s beat, but it still gives her some comfort to listen. Some, because really, when she’s punishing her body for the mere sake of feeling it scream at her, there’s not much comfort to be found.

“Once I ran to you, now I’ll run from you, this tainted love you’ve given-” She’s so busy concentrating on pushing herself, making herself hurt, that she doesn’t realize there’s anyone in front of her until she runs smack dab into them. “Oof!”

She’s knocked flat on her ass, but it doesn’t keep her down (no, of course not, she’s a damn super soldier now). She hops up immediately, intent on apologizing, making sure the other person is okay, and then getting back to her run, when the person she’s run into grasps her arm.

“I’m so sorry, ma’am are you-” Whoever she ran into stops short (she’s trying not to look him in the face, faces are painful to see now that she knows she’ll never see Barnes’ again), and the hand on her elbow falls away, forcing her to look up. Oh no.

“Steve.” Great. Out of all the people she had to run into, it had to be Steve Rogers. She knows most women would be absolutely thrilled to have knocked Captain America off his feet (he’s now brushing off the back of his pants, which she should probably do as well, but can’t bring herself to care), but not her. She likes Steve, really she does. They haven’t spent a lot of time together, but he is -was, he’s gone now, was- Bucky’s best friend, and they got along fine. He’s a nice guy. That’s the real problem, because-

“How’re you doing? I haven’t seen you in forever.” -he’ll ask her that. You know, being nice. Which means she’s going to have to lie.

“I’m fine. Good to see you again.” Now if he’d just get out of her way so she can get back to what she was doing.

“I didn’t know you were a runner.” Damn. He wants to have a conversation. Doesn’t he know that earbuds in means, “Don’t talk to me?” Probably not, because he’d never be that rude. Captain frickin’ America.

“I’m not.” Why did she have to say that? Now he’s looking at her in surprise, eyebrows raised, mouth open in shock.

“Then why-”

“Just thought I’d try it out. See if the super serum really is all that.” She can’t very well tell him that she’s out here hoping that the place where one of Thanos’ goons speared her through the lung (and the kidney… and the intestines… and part of her brain) wasn’t repaired as well as the doctors’ claimed and it’ll open up if she just runs fast enough, allowing her to slowly bleed out. He seems like the type to see that as a cry for help.

He chuckles. “Well, considering you were going around 65 miles per hour, I think you have your answer.” Sixty-five? That can’t be right.

“How do you know that?” He shrugs.

“ ‘Cause that’s how fast I was going, and you ran into me.” Right. Of course she’s now as fast as America’s golden boy. Because her life wasn’t bizarre enough already.

“Sorry.”

“No harm done.” She’s all prepared offer him a courtesy nod and take off again, when- “Are you hungry? Let me buy you breakfast.”

Her first thought is, “He’s flirting with me.” and her anger flares, but then she remembers who this is, and calms down. He’s being nice. Again.

“No thanks. I already ate.” She didn’t, hasn’t in two days in fact, but the damn super serum is keeping her from dropping.

“Then how about coffee?” He can’t take a hint. “Just a head’s up, the serum also keeps you from getting a buzz from the caffeine, but it still tastes the same.”

“I drink tea.” Why does she keep talking to him? The last thing she wants is to be around anyone that reminds her of whom she’s lost.

Steve smirks. “Then let me buy you a cup of tea.” Again, anger wells up in her, anger and pain, but she pushes it down. He doesn’t know about the last person who bought her a cup of tea, or what it lead to. This is just being friendly to the widow (no, they never made it that far, ex girlfriend) of his old pal.

“Please.” The megawatt smile falters for a moment. “We’ve all lost so many people that we can’t afford to let even potential friends slip away that easily.”

She doesn’t want to be his friend. Doesn’t want to be anyone’s friend. She just wants to be left alone for however long she has left until her enhanced body falters and finally gives out. But, it’s against everything she believes, whatever values she has left now that a huge part of her has disappeared like dust left behind after the snap, to return kindness with a cold shoulder. And if he’s so desperate for company...

“Okay.”

___________________________________________________________________________________

He’s never been to this coffee shop before, but he’s trying to hide that fact by studying the menu written in chalk with great concentration. In fact, he doesn’t particularly want to be here now. It’s too empty, too quiet. There’s too many people crying into their beverages of choice. But he had to come up with a valid excuse to keep her from disappearing again like she had three months ago after he told her, “I’m sorry. He’s gone. We lost him.”, and he was running low on ideas.

She looks terrible. No, correction; she looks average. He’s never seen the effects of the serum on a woman before (apart from the brief encounter with Hydra’s other super soldiers), but he’s almost certain she should look… stronger, somehow. More robust. If he’s being honest, she doesn’t even look like her old self, pre-serum.

She’s cut her hair, chopped it off unevenly, and it makes her look more severe. Or maybe that’s the fact that her cheekbones are more prominent, and although it shouldn’t be possible, she has dark circles under her eyes. She’s thinner too, although it’s unavoidable that her muscle tone has improved (at least from what he can tell; she’s in workout clothes, not the trendy kind, but a baggy t-shirt and sweatpants, and besides, he’s keeping his eyes trained respectfully on her face). In short, she looks miserable.

Eventually, they both do order, and he doesn’t so much as get the chance to ask where she’d like to sit before she makes a bee-line for the table in the corner, half-hidden by a large fern, away from everyone else. That cuts down on the chances of them being recognized, or really, mostly him.

He gives her a few minutes to stir and sip her tea before starting the enquiry.

“So how are you doing really?” She nearly drops her cup at that.

“I told you, I’m fine.” So he’s going to have to dig.

“No you’re not.” She opens her mouth, more than likely to contradict him, but he continues. “You can’t be. I’m not, and I don’t know anyone else who is.”

Her eyes narrow, and he’s reminded of something Bucky told him in passing conversation back in Wakanda. “I always know when she’s mad, and so does everyone else. Trust me, you can tell.” He was right. Her face is rapidly flushing, and her posture has completely changed.

“Fine.” She snaps, and begins tearing the label off of her drink. “I’m doing shitty. I don’t have anywhere to live, so I’ve been sleeping at a different emergency shelter every night. I don’t have a job, which means I don’t have a source of income. I don’t know anyone because I’ve never been to fucking New York before. Oh, and my fiance turned to dust in front of me. That what you wanted to hear?”

There’s so much to unpack, but first thing’s first.

“You’re staying at the shelters?” She nods.

“Most nights. Sometimes I sleep on the subway. It’s not like the seats are full anymore.”

That’s not going to cut it. He may not know her well, but he’s not going to let her be homeless. He’s about to offer up the couch in his apartment (or, more than likely once she’s actually agreed to go, the bed while he takes the couch), but out of nowhere, she bursts into tears.

“I’m sorry, Steve.” She swipes at her eyes roughly. “That was rude of me. You didn’t deserve that.” No, he didn’t, but he gets it. This is a weird time for everyone.

“It’s okay.” He attempts what he hopes is a friendly smile. “I think we’ve all earned the right to not be as polite as normal. Plus, you really are doing shitty-”

She chuckles. “Wow. Captain America swears. Who would’ve thought.”

“Don’t tell anyone.”

They sit in silence for a few more minutes, her sipping her tea, and him his… whatever this is. All the while, he’s trying to figure out the best way to shoe-horn, “Let me help you.” into casual conversation. Finally, he decides to just do it. After all, what’s the worst that can happen? She runs off again, goes back to the subway. On second thought, that’s pretty bad. Tact. This is a time for tact.

“What was it you do again? For a job, that is?”

“Did.” What? “Sorry again. Force of habit.” She meets his eyes. “I taught English as a second language, mostly to adults. That makes me a little anal about grammar.”

A teacher… that’s unfortunate, because all schools (and colleges for that matter) nation wide have suspended classes “until further notice” in the wake of Thanos. It’s possible she could submit an application now and be hired whenever they regroup, but she needs a source of income immediately.

“I also worked as a translator briefly. That is, before people started asking questions about how I was able to understand every foreign language they put in front of me without so much as a briefing.” Now that, he might be able to work with. Especially since their team has gotten a lot smaller.

“If, and it’s not a guarantee, but if I could offer you a job working with me, Nat, and what’s left of the team-” She grows a shade paler but doesn’t say anything. “-as a translator only, would you consider it?” To be honest, they could use her as more, especially with the training she received in Wakanda and her new status as a super soldier, but if her reaction is anything to judge from, the wound is too fresh for her agree to that.

“Yes.” The answer is immediate. His shock must show on his face, because she shrugs and tells him, “I’m out of funds and I don’t have a place to live. If someone offered me a job cleaning toilets, I’d take it.” That’s what gives him the courage to mention the next part.

“Is that your mindset about places to sleep too, because I have a couch that pulls out into a bed.” Her eyebrows shoot up, mouth forming a perfect “oh”. “That is, until you find a place. Or I can contact Natasha and see about renting you a hotel room-”

She shakes her head. “No, you’ve been generous enough. All of you, really. I can manage-”

“I know you can.” He feels bad about interrupting her, but this is going nowhere fast. “I know you can take care of yourself and manage on your own. But you don’t have to.” He almost adds that Bucky wouldn’t want that for her, but decides against it just in time. “If we don’t band together to help each other right now, then Thanos may as well have dusted all of us.”

She’s quiet for a few moments, studying her lap, and he thinks that he’s pushed too far. Then, with a sigh, she nods.

“Fine, but just a warning. I talk in my sleep.”

“Duly noted.”

__________________________________________________________________________________

It’s not been as bad as she thought, living with Steve. He’s an orderly guy, so she’s not picking up after him. He knocks before he enters a room, even if the door is open and gives her space. He doesn’t complain if she uses too much hot water and remembers to put the toilet seat down. If anything isn’t to her liking, all she has to do is mention it, and he immediately augments his behavior. In fact, the only disagreements they’ve had in the month and a half since she moved in have been over who gets the bedroom (he insisted on being a gentlemen and taking the couch, which she absolutely refused; she finally won by telling him that if he forced her to take the bed, she’d pack up her suitcase and leave) and who does the cooking (she said she’d do it and the laundry since she’s basically living in his apartment expense free, he said he’d do it on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays while she did it Sunday, Tuesday, and Thursday, then Saturday would be takeout; he won that one because he actually likes to cook).

They don’t really hang out together, apart from occassionally watching the news. Most of their conversations are banal. How was your day, I did laundry, gas prices have gone up, do you want the shower first. Roommate talk, but just from that she can tell why Bucky liked the guy so much, why they were such good friends (especially once she discovers that sweet, polite Captain America can be a sassy son of a bitch when he wants to be). It’s all very… nice.

And still, since that first day, she hasn’t sat down with him and had a conversation. Not about anything significant that is. He’s tried several times, but she’s shut it down as quickly and politely as possible. She appreciates the effort to be her friend, take care of the brokenhearted girl that remains, but she can’t let it go that far. She knows if she lets him scratch the surface, the floodgates will open, and she’s not prepared for that. She doesn’t want to talk about Bucky. She won’t.

No, they’ll just keep being nice to each other, being agreeable until she’s got a couple of paychecks under her belt and can make a deposit on an apartment and pay him back for his kindness (which is another uphill battle, but she’ll think about that later).

That’s the plan anyway, until after a run, she realizes that it’s gone.

“No.”

She distinctly remembers leaving it on the sofa table in an ashtray that’s there for decoration only. It’s where she leaves everything; her wallet, her key to the apartment, the damn knife she purchased as a scared eighteen year old on the run from her government. But it’s not there.

Maybe it was so loose thanks to her self-inflicted emaciation that it came off while she was wearing it as she slept and it’s between the cracks in the sofa cushions? She rips them away as if they’re a bandage, finding nothing (not even lint, because she had a cleaning fit on yet another sleepless night and vacuumed). Under the couch then. Behind it. Nothing and nothing.

She’s ransacked the entire living room and is intent on moving onto the bathroom when the front door opens.

“What the-” She doesn’t bother looking up, but it doesn’t matter. He’s next to her in three strides. “Are you okay?”

She means to reassure him that she’s fine, just misplaced something, but instead what comes out is,

“It’s gone, Steve.”

“What’s gone?” Even as he speaks, she’s emptying out the trash can to make sure she didn’t acidentally throw it out (her mind’s been all over the place these days).

“My ring.” It’s the last piece she has of him. There’s a few pictures saved to her phone (which she can no longer so much as charge up), and his file which has since been given over to her care, but that’s the last physical thing she has that he left her, the last thing his fingers touched that she can touch too. And it’s gone.

“I can’t believe I lost it. I was being so careful-” She’s babbling, not even making sense to herself at this point. “-and now it’s gone. It’s gone, just like him. Fuck!” She shouldn’t be crying like a child, but there’s nothing she can do about it.

“Language.” Her head snaps up to stare at an embarassed Steve. “Sorry. Force of habit. What I mean is, why don’t I help you look for it?” She nods, and forces herself to take a deep breath.

“It was silver-” vibranium actually, but the color is more easily identifiable. “-with engraving-”

“I know what it looks like.” He interrupts sheepishly. “Trust me. He asked me, “Do you think she’ll like it” about a dozen times in ten minutes before he gave it to you.”

She never knew that, and it sends fresh tears to her eyes.

“And it’s vibranium, in case you didn’t know. Said it needed to be-”

“Strong and adaptable.” She recites back. Same as you. That’s what he told her when he slipped it on her finger, explaining why there wasn’t a stone. She doesn’t feel like either of those things. Not since he went, and she stayed. “I know.”

“Alright.” He nods. “When did you last have it?”

“Before my run. I took it off so I wouldn’t lose it.” She laughs bitterly. So much for that.

“Then you check your bag and the bathroom. I’ll give this room another look and search the kitchen? Sound like a plan?” She’s out of the room without a reply.

The bathroom turns up nothing, and despite upending her backpack, purse, and the pockets of each various piece of clothing, there’s no sign of it. So that’s it then. She’s lost him, down to the final shred.

Starvation, over-exertion, lack of sleep: none of it has taken her down so far, but knowing that it’s over, she can’t even hold onto that little piece of him, is what finally makes her legs give out from underneath her as she collapses in a heap.

She hears his footsteps long before he enters the cramped bathroom, but she doesn’t lift her head. At this point, she’s not even sure if she can. If heartache really can kill a person, she won’t be here for much longer. And, if Steve wants to survey the damage, she won’t stop him. She’s too weak to hide it anymore.

“You haven’t eaten anything today.” It’s not a question, so she doesn’t bother to answer. “Or yesterday. I’m not sure about the day before because it looked like you tried the meatloaf, but you could’ve squirreled it away in your napkin while I wasn’t looking.” He’s right. That’s exactly what she did.

Her eyes are closed, but her enhanced senses let her know the moment he sits down next to her, a respectful distance away, of course.

“You could be suicidal. You could have an eating disorder or another mental illness. Or you could just not care anymore. My bet’s on the last one.” What’s there to care about? She has no family. No friends. She has a job now, sure, but they could easily find another translator.

“You don’t care, and you’re grieving. That’s a dangerous combination. Was when I came out of the ice with everyone I loved either dead or dying, and it still is.”

His hand settles on her shoulder. Just lightly. Not so much a grasp or a pat as an assurance, an “I’m here.”

“You need to talk to someone about it. Maybe not me, but someone. You don’t want to go on, but like it or not, you’re here. You’ve gotta find a way to keep going. Maybe find something like a purpose eventually.” He sighs. “I’m gonna get you a glass of water and I’ll be right back.”

“I miss him.” She’s not sure when she decided to say it, or even if she did. “So much.” Steve doesn’t say anything, so she takes it as a sign to continue. “I know I don’t have any right to say that. You knew him for so much longer than I did, and you’re not falling to pieces. But I feel like half of me has been ripped away, and I don’t know how to live without it.” Her voice is barely above a whisper. “I’m not even sure I want to.”

He sighs, and she gathers what little strength she has left to apologize. She shouldn’t talk to him about this. That’s like comparing your stubbed toe to the man who’s had his foot amputated. But before she can do any of that, she hears a muffled thump. She should care what it is, but she doesn’t. That is, until she realizes that Steve is now lying on the floor with her.

“Now that we’re both about as low as we can go-” The corners of her lips turn up despite herself. “-I miss him too. A lot. But not the same way you do.” She would assume not. After all, that would be weird. “There’s a girl I miss like that. Her name was Peggy. But, that’s a conversation for another day.

“I’m not gonna tell you it gets better, because it doesn’t. I’m not gonna tell you you’ll move on, because I haven’t. What I’ll tell you is you learn to live with it. Eventually it hurts less to talk about them, or to even think about them. It still hurts, don’t get me wrong, but it’s more good than bad. Sometimes it helps to talk about them with someone else. For me at least, it’s like I’m keeping her alive. But it’s okay if that’s not something you can do right now. When you’re ready, I’ll be more than happy to take a trip down memory lane if you want.” She nods, still not lifting her head. “Okay. I’ll keep my calendar open. Now, I really need to get you that glass of water.”

He’s nearly out the door when she manages to croak out, “Thank you. For being nice to me. It’s good of you to look after your best friend’s…” What is she now? “...old flame.”

“You’re welcome, and just so you know, I’m not doing this because you’re Bucky’s girl. I’m doing this you because I think we could both use a friend right now. A real one.”

It’s only after he leaves the room that she feels something digging into her hip and discovers the ring in her pocket.

___________________________________________________________________________________

It’s convenient, her moving just down the hall from him. Especially since they had that little talk, and now Steve actually considers her a close friend. She’s looking better now, back to eating and drinking. Sleep is still dubious, and over the past few months, he’s woken multiple times to her screams coming from the living room. At first he ran in, thinking there was an intruder. Now he knows to crouch next to the pullout mattress and shake her shoulder until she wakes up. Occassionally there’s tears. Often there’s a midnight conversation about whichever funny memory they can think of to lighten the mood. As she’s come back to herself, bit by bit, he’s starting to see why Bucky was tied up in knots over her. It’s obvious they were good together in a way that can’t be replicated.

The one thing that hasn’t gone by the wayside is her running, and that’s one he’s not going to touch, because he does the same thing. In the morning, they both take off just as the sun is rising (in opposite directions to avoid anymore collisions), and once whoever’s pushing the envelope on how much distance they can really cover is done, they meet up, have breakfast, and start work.

Natasha keeps giving him not-so-subtle hints that he should ask her out, but that’s never gonna happen. Even if you took away the greiving and both of them still being in love with other people, she’s just not his type. He can’t see her as anything but a good friend at the least and an annoying little sister at the most, and he knows the feeling is mutual.

That’s part of the reason why he doesn’t bother knocking before using his key to step into her apartment, a bag full of things she’s left behind in his hands. She’s not in the living room or the kitchen, and even though they lived together for a solid four months, he’s not about to cross his boundaries and go any further into her place without permission. So he takes a seat on the couch (his old one which is now hers because she claims she’s gotten used to the lumps and can’t sleep without them) and waits for her to appear.

A good fifteen minutes pass before he hears footsteps approaching the apartment and the sound of singing. He recognizes the voice immediately because of the times she’d sing in the shower, but the song is unfamiliar. More than likely, she’s still got her earbuds in and hasn’t realized she’s giving a free concert to anyone in earshot.

“Got the sunshine on my shoulders, got a fist full of four-leaf clovers. Yeah, my cup runneth over. My sky is blue.” Cheerful, and a catchy melody. Maybe he’ll ask her the name so he can look it up. You can find any song you like nowadays on one little app.

“Been kissed by lady luck, the stars are all lined up. Every arrow that I aim is true-” The key turns in the lock and he starts to stand. “-but I miss you.” Some pains never completely fade, but at least they’re talking about it. That has to be worth something.

[evendeadlmthehero]

The Five Year Promise: The Snap (5/10)

Summary: Y/N Stark, 20 year old superhero, makes a promise with a 16 year old Peter Parker after being cheated on, that if she hasn’t found love in the next 5 years, they’d finally go on a date. Then the snap happens. Y/N is gone and Peter isn’t

Warnings: lots of angst and swearing

Twitter// buckyslemons

The Five Year Promise Masterlist

A/N: no one told me how to add read more in my posts on a MOBILE APP, not the laptop so if I see comments saying to add ‘read more’, either teach me or please be quiet.

You and your father were hidden from above watching as needles started to come in contact Dr. Strange's face, causing an obviously painful whitish subcutaneous glow at each touch. “Give me the stone!”

You watch, trying to plan your next move before something taps your shoulder. You raise your hand to it, ready to shoot, but then see what it is and stand down. It was Strange’s cloak. Your father looked at it confusedly. “Wow you're a seriously loyal piece of outerwear, aren't you?”

Suddenly you hear someone drop down before you, making both you and your father turn around. “Yeah, uh, speaking of loyalty.”

“What the-“

“I know what you're both gonna say,” Peter begun as he raised his hands up. He watched as your face turned into one of anger.

“You should not be here,” your father had muttered, shaking his head at both of you. “I did not want either of you here.”

“I was gonna go home-“

“I don't wanna hear it.”

“But it was such a long way down and I just thought about you both,” Peter spoke, glancing at you specifically.

“You’re such an idiot peter!” You told him, anger coursing throughout your body. “My father and I could’ve handled this! This isn’t a fucking game peter, this is a one way ticket!”

“Don’t you think I get that-“

“Obviously not!” You cut him off, taking a step closer to him. “You can’t just risk your life recklessly like that!”

“You’re doing the same thing!” Peter spoke back, his turn to get angry. “I don’t get why it’s so bad when I do it!”

“Because you’re a damn kid Peter!” You yelled back at him. His face dropped for a second before looking at the floor as he played with his fingers. “You do things out of pure instinct. Not thinking that two avengers plus a wizard was enough as it is.”

‘Just a kid,’ he had though. ‘Just a little kid.’

“Come on guys,” your father breathed in heavily as he took you both to the viewpoint as tension between you and Peter rose. “We got a situation. See him down there? He's in trouble. What's our plan? Go.”

“Um. Okay, okay,” Peter spoke, trying to forget what you had said earlier on and concentrate. He had to prove you wrong. That he wasn’t a impulsive teenager. That he was an asset. He and the Cloak then popped back upright. “Okay. Did you ever see this really old movie, Aliens?”

-

“Painful aren't they?” You heard maw speak as he poked Stephen with needles, making him scream. “They were originally designed for microsurgery. And any one of them-“

He stops as he hears a thump behind him. Maw turns to see Iron Man standing there, hand repulsors ready to fire. Ebony Maw’s face remained unchanged as he looked at your father. “Could end your friend's life in an instant.”

Your dad shrugged, acting like he didn’t care. “Gotta tell you, he's not really my friend. Saving his life is more a professional courtesy.”

Maw walks slowly towards your father, beckoning very large, very solid metal objects to float behind him. “You've saved nothing. Your powers are inconsequential compared to mine.”

Your father remained unbothered as he sighed. You readied into position, your fists pointed towards the wall of the spaceship. “Yeah, but the kid's seen more movies.”

You let out a quantum blast which pierces the side of the ship to Maw's right and begins to suck everything out with depressurization, especially Maw and his large objects. Dr. Strange is pulled loose of his pinnings, loses the needles, but also heads for the hole, helpless to resist. The Cape wraps around his arm and an anchor point, but Dr. Strange's arm slips loose and he keeps going.

You are also struggling to hold tight to the pipe attached to the wall. Peter sees this and shoots a web strand at Dr. Strange and you with one hand, while he holds onto a piece of the ship with the other. It breaks, sending them both towards space when his Iron-Spider suit's metal arms brace him to keep him from being sucked out. Fortunately, Dr. Strange is still surrounded by the ship's atmosphere making haste to leave.

“Yes!” Peter yelled excitedly as spider-legs came out of his suit. “Wait what are those!”

Peter crouches with his new spider-legs, and makes a mighty leap and pulls you both back inside. Your father quickly sprays nanites onto the hole to plug it up. He then walks past Dr. Strange, shaking his head and with his armor retreating into its containment as Dr. Strange gets to his feet and becomes en-Cloaked. “We've gotta turn this ship around.”

“Yeah,” you replied back sarcastically as you walked over and sat on the floor, your back against the wall. “Now he wants to run. Great plan.”

Dr. Strange looked over at you. “No, I want to protect the stone.”

Your dad walked towards the expansive front view-port before speaking. “And I want you to thank me now. Go ahead, I'm listening.”

“For what?” Stephen had scoffed, matching Tony’s ego. “Nearly blasting me into space?”

Your father moved his head to the side looking at Strange absurdly. “Who just saved your magical ass? Me.”

Strange shook his head at your dad, letting out a bitter laugh. “I seriously don't know how you fit your head into that helmet.”

“Admit it.” Your father had spoke, taking a step forward. “You should have ducked out when I told you to. I tried to bench you. You refused.”

“Unlike everyone else in your life, I don't work for you.”

“And due to that fact, we're now in a flying doughnut billions of miles away from Earth with no backup!”

“Can you guys for one secound just shut up!” You cut them both off as you walked over to the ship’s systems, trying to work out what it was doing. “This ship is self-correcting its course. Thing's on autopilot.”

Dr. Strange walks closer to you. “Can we control it? Fly us home?”

“Maybe,” you spoke shaking your head as you looked at the various switches and buttons. “Might take a while but we could get home, gather the remaining Avengers and-“

“-I'm not so sure we should,” your father cut you off as he looked to be in a deep thought. You looked at your father confusedly.

“Under no circumstance can we bring the Time Stone to Thanos,” Strange shot at your father. “I don't think you quite understand what's at stake here.”

Your father stalks over to Strange. “No. It's you who doesn't understand, that Thanos has been inside my head for six years since he sent an army to New York and now he's back! And I don't know what to do. So I'm not so sure if it's a better plan to fight him on our turf or his but you saw what they did, what they can do. At least on his turf, he's not expecting it. So I say we take the fight to him. Doctor. Do you concur?”

Dr. Strange thinks for a secound before nodding his head. “Alright, Stark. We go to him. But you have to understand. if it comes to saving you, your daughter, the kid or the Time Stone, I will not hesitate to let either of you die. I can't, because the fate of the universe depends on it.”

“Nice. Good. Moral compass. We're straight,” your father nods at Strange. He then steps over to Peter, as he formally taps each of Peter's shoulders with the edge of his hand, dubbing him as is done at a knighting. “Alright, kid. You're an Avenger now.”

Your father doesn't look at him as he says those words, knowing well what he is signing him up for. Peter however looks at Tony in disbelief, and then cycles through delight, satisfaction, pride and determination, and braces himself for what's to come. You scoff at your dad, knowing all to well what he was doing. You then look at Peter before shaking your head and storming off to find a quiet place out of here.

“Go after her,” your father spoke, giving Peter a little tap on the back. “See if she’s alright.”

Peter nodded at Tony before going over to where you had stormed off. He walked around for a few minutes before he saw you pacing around in an empty room. “I can’t believe it! I can’t believe he just made you an Avenger! I can’t believe you’ve risked your life for no reason and my dad has made you an Avenger!”

Peter scoffed, walking into to room you were in. “You expect me to stay there while you’re up here!”

“You heard me Peter, it’s a one way ticket!” You stopped pacing to look at him as you waved your arms around. “You should’ve stayed there no matter what happens to me!”

“You don’t fucking get it do you!” Peter yelled in frustration, pushing back his hair as his heart started beating rapidly out of anger and exasperation. “For the smartest person in the world you can be so daft!”

You crossed your arms, looking at Peter as he offended you. “Excuse me?”

“Last week you asked if I liked you. I don’t.” He spoke as he clenched his jaw. Your heart dropped for a moment as you took a step back. “The truth is I love you.”

“Peter,” you mumbled, shaking your head at him. “You don’t even know what love is.”

“And there you again, patronising me,” Peter spat out as he laughed bitterly, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

“I’m not!” You told him, uncrossing your arms.

“Yes you are! You always do!” He accused you as he pointed a finger at you. “You think because I’m four years younger than you, that I don’t know anything!”

“I’m not saying that, I’m just saying you haven’t been exposed to many things in life yet,” you replied back, trying to get him to understand where you were coming from. Peter wasn’t in love with you, was he? “Love being one of them.”

“Not exposed?” Peter shouted, his face displaying a look of unbelief for your lack of awareness. “I’ve been exposed for years! For years I’ve been exposed to love because of you! I can’t think of anything but you! And you don’t even fucking see it!”

“Pete-“

“No! You don’t get to talk! Because it’s been like this for two years, of you looking at me like I’m some sort of kid! And this watch?” He held up his wrist as he showed you the watch you gave him. “This is because you feel sorry for me! You don’t love me! C’mon Y/N tell me you don’t actually see me more than a brother, because it’s a one way trip, remember! I might not come back to hear the truth!”

“Peter,” you let out a sigh as you pinched your nose. You honestly don’t why you gave him the watch. Maybe you saw potential in the guy, because he sure did pay attention to you. You thought in the future, you might give it a shot. “you’re a nice guy. I though that-“

“That if you exhausted all your options and still didn’t find the one that I was the last person who you’d date,” Peter let out a little chuckle, looking at the floor. “Its fine I get it.”

“Peter, look you might not even ‘love’ me by the end of five years,” you tried to reason with him, taking a step forward. “You might find someone else when that timer hits zero.”

Peter let out another bitter laugh as he walked over toward you, making your breath halt.

“You know how I know that this is what love is?” Peter spoke, looking at you dead in the eye. “Because what you just said sounds fucking impossible.”

-

You, Peter, Tony and Dr. Strange are aboard the ship when you see the surface of a planet approaching. Dr. Strange looked at your father, walking near the window. “I think we're here.”

“I don't think this rig has a self-park function,” your father spoke before looking at you. “Get your hand into this steering gimbal. Close those around it. You understand?”

“Got it,” you replied back. You walk over to the steering wheel that looked like two gloves, as you put your hand in one of the gloves.

Your father places his hand on the other glove. “This was meant for one big guy, so we gotta to move at the same time.”

The ringship is heading straight for the center of what looks like one of a colossal game of jacks. “We might wanna turn. Turn! Turn! Turn!”

Your father armors up as the ringship clips the "jack" obliquely, but still losing a good third of its hull in the collision. Peter throws up his helmet at the same time. Doctor Strange steps between them and creates the Shield of the Seraphim around you all, anticipating a rough landing. The ship, now reduced to about 40%, plows through the dirt and stops, leaning slightly to one side. Doctor Strange helps you and your now de-helmeted father, to your feet. You’re both panting a little from the exertion of arrival. “You alright? That was close. I owe you one.”

Peter descends from above in classically spider-like fashion as all three of you looked at him. “Let me just say, if aliens wind up implanting eggs in my chest or something, and I end up eating you, I'm sorry.”

Your father pointed at Peter like a parent telling off his child. “I don't wanna hear another single pop culture out of you for the rest of the trip. You understand?”

“I'm trying to say that-“ Peter stopped as he looked behind you both. “Something is coming.”

A grenade rolls into view. You, Peter, Strange and Tony get thrown well back when it fires its energy pulse.

“Thanos!” You hear a creature yell as he flings a blade at Doctor Strange, who neatly deflects it with a mystical shield, and in return sends the Cloak of Levitation at the creatures face, half-smothering him and throwing him to the floor. You see what seemed to be a Human attacking your father and due to how close your father was to him, you couldn’t just shoot at him. The man had your father in what seemed to be a magnet.

You opted for your black widow skills and ran toward him, wrapping your legs around his neck, choking him with your thighs.

“Get off me!” The man yelled as he tried to smack you in the head with the back of his gun. You grabbed it with your hand. The man purposely fell backwards to get you off his back, making you see a daze. He then shot an electric current that wrapped around you like a cord. Your dad pulls free of the magnet then runs towards Drax as soon as he sees that Quill had you, putting a foot on his torso.

Quill has you in a head-lock, gun pointed at your head. Doctor Strange has a mystical shield of golden energy up, and stands ready at the third point of the triangle. Mantis had Parker in a coma.

It was a complete mess.

“Alright, everybody, stay where you are, chill the F out,” Quill spoke as he depowered his helmet. “I'm gonna ask you this one time. Where's Gamora?”

Your father spoke, dehelmeting as well. “Yeah, I'll do you one better. Who's Gamora?”

“I’ll do you one better! Why is Gamora?” The creature that was headlocked by your father spoke out.

“What the fuck is wrong with him,” you whispered to yourself as you looked at the creature that your father had under his foot.

“Tell me where the girl is, or I swear to you, I'm gonna French-fry little miss thighs of death!” Quill had spoke, pushing the gun towards your head more.

“Let's do it! You shoot my daughter, I blast him. Let's go!” Your father threatened as he extends his nano-tech cannon, looking uncannily like an electric shark about to eat Drax's face.

“Do it, Quill! I can take it.”

“No, he can't take it!” Mantis yelled back.

“She's right. You can't,” Dr Strange deadpanned.

“Oh yeah? You don't wanna tell me where she is? That's fine. I'll kill all four of you and beat it out of Thanos myself,” the man spoke before looking at you. “Starting with you.”

“Wait, what. Thanos?” Dr Strange spoke, trying to inject clarity and sanity into the situation. “Alright, let me ask you this one time. What master do you serve?”

“What master do I serve? What am I supposed to say? "Jesus"?” The guy spoke making you roll your eyes at him as it dawned to you.

“You're from Earth?” You had asked him, turning around to look at him from the death grip he had you in.

“I’m not from Earth. I'm from Missouri.”

‘Well this was going to be a long day,’ you thought you yourself as you closed you eyes and sighed.

-

Peter and yourself had sat on one of the rocks in the planet which you came to learn was called titan. Despite your predicament and the place in ruins, it was a beautiful place.

Your dad was trying to explain the plan to a group of people who you’d learnt the names of a while ago. The one that looked like a Prey Mantis had the name Mantis. Go figure.

Mantis was currently jumping on what seemed to be a gas emitting from the ground or something, you didn’t know. But what you did know was if Thanos was as strong as others had told you he was, then you guys were in for it. Because you had found a team of some questionable characters.

You sighed, rubbing your temple before facing Peter, who looked like he was ignoring you. “Pete?”

He didn’t respond, staring at the rocks in front of him. You shook your head, playing with your fingers.

“Come one Pete,” you softly spoke, turning around to have your body face him. “We might not come back out of this. We need to talk.”

“Fine,” Peter mumbled, grabbing a rock from the floor and chucking it across. “You go first since I already confessed about how I love you and how apparently it’s not even real.”

You rubbed your eye before biting the bottom of your lip, trying to form some logical explanation on your outburst. You looked around the planet, playing with the material of your suit.

“Truth is Peter, you’re not a kid. You’re smart, mature, attentive and heroic,” you spoke. “But I didn’t give you that watch to risk your life for me. Or to ignore other girls for me. I gave you that watch because if you exhaust all your options, and there’s no one else left, that we give it a go. Because I want to. But I want to make sure you 100% want to and not because I’m the first girl you like.”

Peter’s head moved up at that comment. “That’s the thing. I don’t think I’ll ever find someone like you. And it scares me. So when you gave me that watch...for once I-I felt hopeful. I felt hopeful that we might have something. Maybe not now, but in the future.”

“Exactly Peter,” you spoke, putting your arm around his shoulders as you pointed at his watch. “This is for the future. In the future things change. Things become unpredictable. Hell, you might not want to wear this in a couple of months or years time. But that’s okay. The main thing is when we’re both ready, if we are ready, we’ll give it a shot. It’s just now I can’t. Not because of age primarily but because I just got my heart broken. And you need to meet other girls before you decide what you want. Because once we start, we can’t be friends if things go wrong.”

“I get it,” Peter whispered to himself, rubbing his arm. “You need time. And I need time too. I need time to actually grow. To learn. To be a man. I’m 16 and you’re 21. We both need time. It isn’t right to try now.”

You give Peter a hug which he returns. It’s warm and gives you a feeling of eating a hot chocolate fudge during Christmas. Like home. “I hope the future is kind to us.”

“I hope so too,” Peter replied back as you both pulled away from each other. You then looked at each other’s eyes, for a secound almost lost.

You then awkwardly looked away, your attention once again caught by the Mantis girl as she spoke. “Excuse me, but, does your friend often do that?”

You looked over to where she was pointing, where you see Dr. Strange sitting cross-legged. He was floating slightly above the ground, his hands poised in a mystic gesture with the Time Stone glowing brightly in the Eye of Agamotto setting. Green vapor-like energy flows from the stone, and more intricate magical energy patterns circle Dr. Strange's forearms. The Cloak of Levitation flows behind him as if the Stone is creating a strong breeze. His eyes are closed, and his head is jerking rapidly from side to side, the motion blurring, but resembling looking for something.

Peter, you and your father ran over to him. Your father grabbed him, shaking him. “Strange! We alright?”

Dr. Strange snaps out of his trance and falls forward, letting out a cry.

“You're back. You're alright,” your father breathed in heavily as he took a step back.

“Hey, what was that?” Peter asked Strange who was still breathing deeply. He then sighed, looking at you all.

“I went forward in time to view alternate futures. To see all the possible outcomes of the coming conflict,” Strange spoke, looking deflated.

“How many did you see?” Quill had asked him.

“14,000,605”

Your father looked nervous as he asked the next question. “How many did we win?”

Dr. Strange stares intently at Tony for a moment. He looks at your father like he was silently apologising to him, giving you a quick glance. “One.”

At the time, that look meant nothing to you. Like it was just Strange tired from viewing all possible outcomes.

But looking back at it, you would’ve yelled at him. Pleaded with him. That somehow, someway it could’ve gone differently.

That there was an outcome that he may have missed.

-

You hid behind a rock with Peter, waiting for the arrival of Thanos. You were lying if you said you weren’t afraid. You were. It was like being a child. You think there’s monsters under your bed. You tell your parents, and they laugh, saying that monsters aren’t real. And then you return to bed, unable to sleep.

This is what it felt like, your heart thudding against your chest. This is it. This is what you’ve been waiting for. And although you’ve been waiting six years, you still didn’t feel prepared.

“Somethings not right,” you whispered to Peter, giving him a quick glance before keeping your eyes out for Thanos. “Something- I don’t think I- I will make it- fuck.”

You shook your head, tears welling up in your eyes. Peter moved towards you, rubbing your back. “Pete? Can you promise me something?”

“Anything,” Peter spoke, looking at you concerned. You bit the inside of your cheek, trying to contain yourself.

“I don’t want you to comment on this, just a yes or a no. I don’t want sympathy and I don’t won’t hope. I just want a yes or a no,” You begun before looking away at him and back where Strange was. “If I don’t make it, take care of my father will you?”

“Y/N-“

“Will you?” You reinforced. Peter gulped, before nodding. He wouldn’t let you die. He couldn’t let you die. “Good. Great talk.”

You let out a little breath before you look back. A blue mist started appearing, getting bigger and bigger. You know what it was. It was a portal created by the tesseract. You remembered it from 2012.

You then see a giant man who looked almost 8 foot tall. He had a violet complexion and donned a gauntlet with four stones; reality, space, power and soul.

You held your breath as you realised he’s here. Thanos is here.

“Oh, yeah, you're much more of a "Thanos”,” Dr Strange spoke from the stone he was sitting on. Thanos looked at him, his face unchanged.

“I take it the Maw is dead,” Thanos sighed, as he slowly walked around before stopping. “This day extracts a heavy toll. Still, he accomplished his mission.”

“You may regret that,” Dr Strange replied arrogantly. “He brought you face-to-face with the Master of the Mystic Arts.”

Thanos let out a little smile. “And where do you think he brought you?”

You see Star-Lord crouch behind wreckage with his weapon ready, behind Thanos. You and Peter peek from behind Dr Strange. “Let me guess. Your home?”

Thanos begun explaining his home, showing various imagery of what used to be. Explains why he was doing what he was. Trying to justify himself.

Dr. Strange summons his Mandalas, entering a fighting pose. “I think you'll find our will equal to yours.”

And that’s when you all get out of your position.

“Ours?” Thanos spokes before he looks up to a see a chunk of wreckage descending rapidly on him, too rapidly to react and powered by your father. He is subsequently crushed by it.

The wreckage on top of Thanos erupts in purple, as he bellows in rage. He turns the hovering fragments into a flock of bats with the Reality Stone and swarms your dad with them, driving him back through the ruins.

Peter webs his eyes, and swings in to kick him in the face at the same time that Drax leaps from cover, blades in both hands, to knee-slide behind Thanos and try for a tendon slide across the back of the Titan's knee.

You jump through a portal that strange had created and blast golden energy, that sends Thanos hurdling back. He uses the reality stone to send the discarded ship towards you, but you fly in full speed right through it as the heat from the quantum energy sliced the metal of the ship.

Strange starts dueling with Thanos while Drax attacks similarly on his other side. Thanos punches Drax through a ruined wall, then shatters the blade with one hand and tears the web from his eyes. He advances on Doctor Strange and kicks at him, but Strange's shield absorbs the damage.

You make your way back on the ground, and shoot Thanos from behind. Thanos uses the Power Stone to shoot balls of energy towards you but you quickly deflect them with your own powers. You then use quantum energy to lift up a massive rock and aim it at Thanos who crushes it before it even reaches him.

“Don’t let him close his fist,” you had heard Dr Strange whisper to his cloak. The Cloak swoops off Doctor Strange's shoulders and wraps itself tightly around Thanos' armored hand, who starts tugging at this unexpected wrapping.

Doctor Strange starts throwing portals everywhere. Peter leaps through one on Thanos' left.

“Magic!” He punches Thanos in the head and vanishes through a portal to the lower right before reappearing above Thanos. “More magic! Magic with a kick! Magic with a-“

Before he can finish Thanos turns, grabbing him from the air, and throwing him to the ground, with his hand around his neck. “Insect!”

He then throws him at Doctor Strange, knocking them both down. Thanos finally tears the Cloak away and is then promptly surrounded by fiery explosions as you bombarded him with your powers.

He sucks all the flame into the gauntlet with the Power Stone and fires it in a stream back at you, hitting you dead on and sending you far away.

Peter leaps from behind, more conventionally this time, while Thanos concentrates his fire on you, and webs the gauntlet and drops down in front of him, pulling hard to stop Thanos from hurting you.

‘Can’t let her die,’ Peter had thought.

Thanos yanks on the web-line, pulling the much lighter teenager towards him, and punching him on his way past. He tears the webbing free of the gauntlet just in time for a small spaceship to attempt to crash-land on him.

The ship drags Thanos along for a distance, burying him under debris. He stands just as the pilot leaps in a great arc to punch him, landing in front of him with an energy-blade at the ready.

It was Nebula.

Thanos punches her away. Doctor Strange uses the Crimson Bands of Cyttorak to pinion the gauntlet, pulling Thanos' fingers open and trying to pry the gauntlet off his hand.

Thanos tries to pull free, as Drax slides in from his right, kicking his knee and knocking him off-balance, then wrapping himself around Thanos' kneeling leg. You quantum blast his legs, making him fall, before holding his legs in a ball of energy.

Star-Lord shoots a electric trap onto the ground to Thanos' right, the tangle-field holding down his unarmored hand. Peter swings in, webs Thanos' chest then wraps it around behind him, digging his Iron Spider legs into the ground to anchor himself.

Doctor Strange opens a portal straight above Thanos' out of which drops Mantis, landing on the Titan's shoulders, her hands on his temples. He bellows as she tries to put him under.

Thanos was now trapped. And you were slightly relieved.

Your father is pulling on the gauntlet. Doctor Strange reapplies the Crimson Bands of Cyttorak to reinforce the trap's hold on Thanos' right hand, and the Cloak helps him pull. Thanos is finally subdued enough to incapacitate, not fully asleep.

“Is he under?” Your father spoke as continued pulling on the gauntlet. “Don't let up.”

“Be quick,” Mantis cried as she clenched her eyes closed, trying to concentrate. “He is very strong.”

“Parker, help! Get over here,” your father spoke as Peter drops his web-line, and hurries to help Tony with the gauntlet. “She can't hold him much longer. Let's go.”

Quill flies over to join the others, stands in front of Thanos, tauntingly. “I thought you'd be harder to catch. For the record, this was my plan. Not so strong now, huh? Where is Gamora?”

Thanos stirred from that name, still under asleep. “My Gamora.”

“No, bullshit,” Quill spat out, as you continued comcentrating your power on holding Thanos’ legs. “Where is she?”

Mantis lets out a sob, her face in shock. “He is in anguish.”

“Good,” Quill spat out harshly, staring at Thanos.

“He- he mourns.”

“What does this monster have to mourn?” Drax yelled.

Nebula had stood there, her eyes welling up as she put the pieces together. “Gamora.”

“Fuck,” you whispered, looking at Quill who’s face was in shock.

“What?”

Nebula shook her head with horror and sadness at what had happened. “He took her to Vormir. He came back with the Soul Stone but she didn't.”

Your father frasps the danger immediately and de-helmets. “Okay, Quill, you gotta cool it right now, you understand?”

Quill slowly turns to Thanos.

“Don't, don't, don't engage, we've almost got this off!”

“Tell me she's lying,” Quill spoke, now enraged. “Asshole! Tell me you didn't do it!”

“I had to.”

Quill shook his head while starting to tear up. “No, you didn't! No, you didn't!.”

He continues to rage and then pistol-whipping Thanos twice in the face, causing Mantis to let go in pain. “No you didn’t!”

“Quill!”

Your father leaps for Star-Lord's arm, re-helmeting and leaving Peter to pull off the gauntlet. You hold onto Thanos’ legs with your powers more strongly, your whole body aching in pain. Thanos wakes completely, now well and truly furious. He head-butts Mantis, grabbing the cuff of the gauntlet just as it is sliding off his hand, causing Peter to stumble back, and then throwing Mantis away off his shoulders.

Thanos kicks Drax off his right leg and into Nebula and Star-Lord, knocking them down. He yanks on the Crimson Bands holding his right hand to throw Doctor Strange far away, and swats away your father and his repulsor shots.

He then grabs you, using the power stone to chuck you across the sky. Peter sees this and runs over to you but before he reaches you, your head hits the rock.

Your vision starts to daze, the last thing you see is Peter’s face before you black out.

-

Your vision was blurry as you opened your eyes, blinking rapidly. You could hear voices murmuring somewhere as you focussed on the orange sky above you. You look to your left, seeing a familiar brown pair of eyes. “Peter?”

Peter smiled at you, but it didn’t fully reach his face. Your head was pounding as you looked at your surroundings. Half of the guardians passed out and you dad clutching his injured stomach. And then Strange. Strange didn’t have the time stone.

“Oh no,” you muttered shaking your head, making your head pound even more. “Wh- what happened.”

“Thanos wanted to kill your dad,” he mumbled defeatly, making your eyes widen as you looked over to your dad. “Then Dr Strange gave up the stone for his life.”

You quickly got up, Peter quickly trailing behind you just in case you had fell. You had ran up to your dad, taking him by surprise as you gave him a tight squeeze. No words were exchanged, but both of you knew how much you loved one another.

“Stop being such a self-sacrificial ass, okay?” you told him, grabbing his cheeks as you made him look you in the eyes. Your father gave you a sad grin and a little nod. “Y-you can’t do that.”

You then grabbed Peter and pulled him into the hug with you and your father. You guys all squeezed each other, happy that none of you guys had died. That you might have a chance of coming back home, or to what’s left of it if the remaining Avengers don’t win.

You then made eye contact with Dr Strange, who hasn’t stopped looking at you for a while now. You then pull away from the hug and walk over to him. “You gave away the stone.”

Dr Strange nodded, not breaking eye contact with you. “Yeah, I did.”

You nodded, looking at his face for any answers on why he did what he did. A thunder broke your gaze, as you looked up and saw a cloud forming. You then saw Dr Strange in the side of your eye let out a sigh.

You then felt sick, your stomach doing somersaults. Your vision started going in and out of focus, your whole body shivering. You were scared and terrified. You didn’t know what was happening but you knew it was something horrible.

“Ah!” You screamed, as you held your stomach in pain. Peter and your father ran over to you, trying to hold you upright.

“Hey, hey what’s wrong?” Your father asked as he sat you down. You shook your head, your eyes filled with tears as the most excruciating pain jolted throughout your body.

“Something is happpening,” Mantis cries as everyone looked over to her. And then the most horrifying thing happened to her. Her body had slowly disenergrated into ash, the wind carrying it away.

“Quill?” Drax had spoken as he too had disenergrated whilst Quill watched in horror. Your father had gotten up, walking over to Star-Lord as he too started to fade.

“Steady, Quill,” your dad spoke before Quill had vanished. You let out a sob as the pain got worse and worse.

“Tony,” Dr Strange had spoken, catching your father’s attention. Little speckles left his body as he looked at your dad with pleading eyes. “There was no other way.”

He had vanished as well, leaving you, Peter, your father and Nebula. You let out a cry before shaking your head. “It hurts so much!”

“Hey, Hey, Hey,” your dad spoke, his eyes tearing up. “It’s going to be fine. We just have to get back to earth.”

“You don’t understand!” You told him, lifting your arm up as you saw dust particles leave your hand and then re-forming. “Dad I- it’s me too. I have- he-“

You shook your head, not wanting to say. Your suit was trying to heal you. But the pain was getting worse and worse. “I h-have to turn the suit off.”

“No!” Your dad yelled at you. You looked at Peter, seeing tears fall down his face as he watched on silently. You closed your eyes, falling into a hysteria of cries.

“I’m gonna g-go either way Dad,” you spoke, unable to form coherent sentences. “I have to do it.”

“Please-“

“I l-love you dad. Please don’t waste your life,” you cried out to him, holding his hand. You then looked at Peter giving him a sad smile. “And Pete, I like you. I do. B-but I was always scared to give it a go. B-but remembered what you promised. P-please.”

“No, no, no you can’t just do that! You can’t smile at me and tell me everything’s gonna be alright every time it isn’t!” Peter shook his head at you, grabbing your hand. “You- you- please just- just lets take you home, we can fix this. P-please j-just look me in the- the eyes-“

“F.R.I.D.A.Y,” you whispered, as you gave your father one last look before looking at Peter who was a sobbing mess. You then squeezed his arm while he was speaking.

“A-and know everything’s going to be fine,” Peter finished, his whole body shaking. His Spider senses was on overdrive as anxiety flooded his whole body. He couldn’t lose you. Not again. Not ever. “J-Just please stay.”

“Turn off my suit,” you finished your command, giving both men a smile as you saw dust particles slowly leave your body.

“No!” Peter yelled out, trying to stop the dust from leaving your body. Your dad watched you, unable to take his eyes off from decaying daughter, watching in absolute shock and grief.

Peter’s senses allowed him to hear your heartbeat get fader and fader before it wasn’t there at all. He can hear every spec leave your body, one by one. It was by far one of the worst experiences in his life.

Peter Parker had to watch you die twice.

Your body slowly collapsed into a pile of ash. Peter sobbed as he grabbed the dust from the floor and trying to put them together. “Th-this isn’t h-her! S-she doesn’t l-look like this! She- we have to- she can’t- We have to fix her!”

Tony watched in silence as Peter tried to pick up your ashes. He watched as Peter let out a gut wrenching cry as he realised he couldn’t do anything with what was left of you. Tony then slowly picked up what was left of you and closed his hand into a fist as he placed it near his heart.

He had failed. He had lost his only daughter.

[i-have-a-wonky-eye-too]

I’ll keep you safe... 9/?

<Part 8<

"Excuse me," Steve watched Bucky as he excused himself from the room to answer his cell, leaving Steve to continue the meeting with his friend.

"Rogers?" Tony raised his eyebrow questioningly as he noticed Steve lose focus. "Everything okay?"

Steve nodded, "Yeah, fine," He cleared his throat. "You were saying."

"Right," Tony nodded, "My men don't seem to be able to get anything on Thanos. Rumlow, he's a little bitch who likes to flaunt his business,"

Steve nodded, "I'm all too familiar with his games, Tony. Although, this last week he seems to have gone quiet. I'm afraid he might be planning something," Steve let out a frustrated sigh. "Look, Tony, what I'm asking is a big favour and I know, over the last couple of years we've been a bit rocky-"

"Look, kid, what we do, it's expected of us to have fall-outs, the main thing is we stick together when it comes to assholes like Rumlow and even bigger fucks, like Thanos." Tony grinned, "Although, you don't help matters by dicking his daughter." Tony teased.

"She's not his daughter!" Steve snapped.

Tony chuckled, "So, you are, dicking her?"

Steve let out a big sigh as he shook his, then chuckled as he looked up to his friend. "I'm not, sleeping with her, Tony."

"But, you want to."

"I don't... Just want to have sex, with her, Tony. I-" Steve sighed as he leaned forwards onto his desk and dropped his head into his hands, "She's, nice... You know. Even though she's been involved in this hell of a life, because of him... she's... She's different. She needs saving too and, I don't usually get the chance to do that and, she makes me want to do that... To keep her-"

"Steve!" Bucky called out before he threw the door open. "Rumlow took Y/N!" ---------- "Y/N?!"

You let out a heavy sigh, relieved to finally hear Steve's voice as he stormed through the house to where you were. "Steve," You cried and threw yourself into his arms as soon as you could.

"Shh," Steve held your trembling body in his arms, his hand cradling the back of your head as you cried into his neck. "Shh, I've got you, baby girl." He pressed a hard comforting kiss to your forehead.

"He- He was taking me, t-to..." You pulled back from him with panic in your eyes as your fists screwed up the material of his jacket, "I was going back to, Thanos."

Steve shook his head, cupping your face in his hands, "That's never going to happen, okay? Never."

You shook your head, "It nearly did. I thought, I thought I'd never see you again-"

"Shh," Steve pulled you back into his arms, holding you as close as he could. "I promised you, Y/N, that I'd keep you safe, and I will."

You nodded, sobbing into his shoulder as Steve soothingly rub his hand up and down your back. You felt safe.

"Steve?" You jumped at the sound of an unfamiliar voice behind you. "Sorry, Miss," The older man smiled politely as he stepped into the room, "Didn't mean to scare you."

"Y/N, this is Tony, a friend of mine," Steve smiled softly at you as placed his hand on the small of your back.

You nodded, "Hello,"

"It's nice to meet you," Tony smiled before turning back to Steve, "One of my... Hmm, men, says he knows where Rumlow is, right now..." Tony looked at his phone, "He's seen this guy a few times, too, going through Queens."

Steve nodded with a deep sigh, "I think it's time I spoke to Rumlow."

"Together, buddy," Tony reached out and clapped his hand over his shoulder, "He can't take both on at once." Tony smirked. The way he looked had a dangerous hint but it made you feel safe.

"Steve... Are you, are you going to kill, him?"

Steve shook his head, "Unfortunately doll, I do need to speak to him. Find out what game he's playing."

"Then, you'll kill him?" You smiled at him, "I'd like to be there when you end that bastards life."

Tony's head fell back as he laughed loudly, almost tipping himself over. "Wow! She certainly is something else, Rogers. I see why you're smitten with her." He chuckled, walking out the room as you and Steve both blushed and avoided looking at one another.

"I, hmm, I'll send Bucky to go, hmm, to collect Nat and bring her here. I don't want you being alone whilst I deal with this, okay?" You nodded with a soft hum, "Okay. I might be a while, but when I'm back, the two of us will get take-out and talk, if you want, okay?"

You nodded once more, "Sounds good, Steve." You smiled at him.

He nodded, smiling briefly before he let out a heavy sigh, "BUCK!"

----------

"What do you mean, you don't cook?" You giggled softly as you watched Nat try to stir the tomato sauce without splashing her dress even though she had an apron on for that purpose.

She shrugged before taking a large gulp of her wine. "I never need to."

You frowned down at the pasta you were making, "What do you do for food, then?" You asked glancing up.

"I eat take-out or at restaurants." She tutted as a bit of tomato sauce spat up and got her.

You giggled, "How the fuck are you so thin?"

She let out a snort, "All the sex, baby."

The two of you burst out laughing, passing silly comments back and forth as you continued to cook and drink the last of the bottle of wine.

"Mmm, something smells good in 'ere." Bucky walked into the kitchen, followed by Sam, and shortly after Steve walked in with a large smile on his face.

"What's going on?" Steve asked as he walked up to Natasha and bent over to inhale the scent of the tomatoes.

"I thought I'd cook for you guys. My way of thanking you all, especially Sam for today." You smiled thankfully at him.

A light blush tinted his cheeks as he looked away, heading over to the fridge. "Don't worry about it." He mumbled.

You let out a soft chuckle before looking properly at the three men. "I take it, it didn't go so smoothly talking to Rumlow?" You raised your eyebrow at Steve.

Steve looked down at the blood on his dress shirt that wasn't his. "Erm, there was some, resistance at first but-" Steve shrugged his shoulders, "Don't worry about it, doll, it's all good." He smiled.

You nodded, "Mm, if you say so." You shook your head with a soft sigh. "Dinner is still gonna be a while, plenty of time for the three of you to freshen up."

"Nah, we're good like this, sweetheart." Steve smiled and went to kiss your cheek but you put your hand up so he kissed that instead.

"I don't think so, Al Capone. No bloodstains at the table." You giggled, moving round Steve over to the stove so you could start putting the lasagne together.

Natasha burst out laughing at Steve as the boys tried their best not to. "Yes, ma'am," He smiled. "C'mon you two, you heard the lady."

Natasha shook her head with a smile. "Well, that is something."

"What is?"

"Steve Rogers doing as he's told." She grabbed another bottle of wine, "That is cause for a drink." She grinned making you laugh.

[galacticempiress]

trespasser (5/?)

star wars x mcu x fem!reader

summary: while the resistance and the first order are busy with each other, leia senses rey and kylo, realizing they’re on earth. meanwhile on earth, the avengers try to make rey feel safe.

introducing...superherodisguise!kylo! i thought it would be kinda cool to add that in. this chapter is inspired by @spideyanakin​! they also have an amazing star wars/marvel au if yall wanna check it out!

warnings: cussing, violence, mention of sex.

“Why can’t he see me...” Leia envisions Kylo in a diner but he wasn’t wearing his dark robes anymore. He was wearing cuffed light blue jeans, a black long sleeved shirt, white shoes that had an arched logo on them, and a black cap. Kylo tilted his head towards Leia, sensing her but quickly turned back to the waitress heading his way. 

“General, we just received news that Kylo Ren is nowhere to be seen. Along with Rey and the outsiders.” Poe informs Leia, interrupting her moment. Leia pauses and looks up at the commander.

“I know exactly where they are, Dameron.”

                                   -

“Do you guys have an Alderaan Twist?” Rey shifts uncomfortably on the sofa. Rey didn’t know what to expect but she was surprised at how Earth was not under complete destruction. She had wondered why no one had bothered to do anything with this planet

“We...don’t have that here.” Tony sighs, taking out a bottle of alcohol (which (Y/N) quickly put away). Tony had thought he had overcome his fear of the Dark Jedi but once he saw him, his whole body shut down on him. The feeling of anger wavered on Tony which caused him to snap. “You know, this is my fault. If I hadn’t bothered Thanos’ escape plan, I wouldn’t have gone through that hole!”

“Tony, don’t be so hard on yourself-” (Y/N) started but was interrupted.

“I’m not! I...I...” The billionaire started to crack and put his face in his hands. I don’t want to be seen as weak. “Y’know what, you guys start making Rey feel comfortable.” Everyone started to speak against Tony but he raised his voice, “I just need some time to myself.” With that, he went to another part of the building.

Moments of silence passed. Everyone knew that wasn’t Tony’s first time out in space. When he brought the explosive to space, no one knew exactly what happened but it made him cut off everyone for a bit. What happened recently was much more worse than before. “Is he uhm...usually that dramatic?” Rey spoke up, breaking the silence. 

“He’s been through a lot of things. Things that we have never encountered until extraterrestrial beings came 11 years ago.” Steve then later explained about the Battle of New York City, Rey seemingly fascinated by this but also upset.

“...It wasn’t common knowledge here - on Earth - that people like me were out there?” 

“We knew that Thanos and Thor’s galaxy existed and no one bothered to think about the other galaxies that could have even more living beings. Then Tony got sucked into that wormhole a couple years later.” 

Rey was left speechless. People didn’t know about us? Her thought process was interrupted by Peter, seemingly nervous. “I’m sorry Ms. Rey but uhm...does your lightsaber still work?” Peter mutters, a shy smile plastered on his face. Rey smiled.

“Let’s see!” She smirked before raising her arm but nothing happened. “What?” She moves her arm around before the lightsaber finally reached her hand from afar. “It usually doesn’t take that long...” Rey ignited her lightsaber, a glowing blue radiating from it. Peter silently fangirled at the glowing weapon. He couldn’t wait to tell Ned. 

The rest of the Avengers weren’t as ecstatic as Peter but they were still amazed. Their mouths were slightly agape except for Thor, who coughs. “Can uh- anyone do that?” The God of Thunder lets out a small laugh while Rey turns her attention to him. 

“Not everyone, only those who are strong with the Force.” 

“Well, let’s see!” Thor grunts out the last word and stretches his arm out towards the lightsaber. It shakes slightly in Rey’s hand until it eventually stopped. Thor sighs, “It was worth a try.”

Everyone chuckles at the embarrassed Thor. (Y/N) felt her phone buzz in her pocket, taking it out while chuckling. Her face turned stern as she looked at it. She walked out of the room, unbeknownst to the group. Her heart dropped at the text.

Matt Murdock: I know I’m the last person you want to text but I think I’ve encountered something that’s Avengers level.

(Y/N) scrunched her nose in disgust. She remembered she met Matt as Daredevil when she was dealing with street level threats. Matt never killed as it was his number one rule but (Y/N) absolutely hated the way Matt took care of crime. There was no such thing as second chances. Of course, they’ve encountered each other before. (Y/N) remembered the times in the bedroom with him. It was just several hookups with tension waiting to be released, nothing more. She was then given the opportunity to do something good for not just the streets, but the world. The (H/C) haired woman thought process was interrupted by another text.

Matt Murdock:

This is something serious. Hudson Yards.

Sighing, (Y/N) turned off her phone. Siri can say the read receipt. Grabbing your things, you walked past the group and towards the door. “Where are you going?” Natasha grabs (Y/N)’s wrist, making her shake her grip off. The redhead’s eyes widen in surprise and she quickly apologized.

“Have to take care of some old business. I’ll be back.” (Y/N) sighs stressfully while quickly heading to her car. As she drove away, Natasha couldn’t help but question. 

                                  -

“Out of all places, fucking Hudson Yards?” (Y/N) muttered under her hoodie. Parking her car next to a fire hydrant, she walked towards the tourist attraction. How the hell am I gonna find Matt here? Her eyes darted around the tourist filled area.

“Hey.” She felt a hand on her shoulder and quickly reacted. The long time friend blocked her fist. “We’re around a lot of people. I wouldn’t do that.” The brunette warned while the former assassin slapped his hand off.

“It was a reflex.” (Y/N) huffed, crossing her arms. “What did you want to tell me that was so serious?” 

Matt lowers his voice, loud enough for only her to hear. “You been outside of Earth recently?” As soon as Matt said that, the color drains from (Y/N)’s face. “I couldn’t tell if it was a genuine threat to Earth or some crazy guy...” The brunette awkwardly chuckles before he hears her heartbeat increase dangerously. The smile on his face disappears when he didn’t hear her say a word.

She grabs his shoulders, “What did he say to you?” Matt sensed her fear and it was nothing compared to the fear she had on the streets.

“He asked me what planet he was on and called me uh- rebellious-”

“Rebel scum. Tony mentioned that...” (Y/N) trailed off on the last part before regaining focus, “That’s enough. T-Thank you, Matt.” (Y/N) starts to wonder off back to her car before Matt grabbed her again. An old spark of tension came back. Both of you knew better than to continue it.

“If you need anything, just call me.” (Y/N) gave him a small smile before letting go. She walked further away from the attraction and onto the somewhat quiet street. The more (Y/N) walked, there were less people on the cold dark street. Instantly, she had the feeling she was being watched. “Show yourself.” She waited for a few seconds until she heard footsteps behind her. Running. Turning around, she saw the man she saw earlier today. Kylo let out a yell before trying to behead the (H/C). She caught the hilt, trying to push it away.

“Outsider.” Kylo spat while he applied more pressure onto his weapon. The lightsaber was just inches away from singeing her neck. (Y/N) struggled and applied more pressure towards Kylo. They continued to struggle but something inside (Y/N) snapped.

“Fuck. Off!” She yelled before applying even more pressure. The raven haired man looked at the lightsaber that was now shaking. He wasn’t using the Force, he couldn’t be. He slowly looked up at his enemy, who was absolutely enraged. A dark smirk appeared on his face before Kylo completely stopped pushing his lightsaber. Kylo ducked as the lightsaber flew past him and landed on the sidewalk in another block. 

(Y/N)’s face went from confusion to, slowly, into shock. She looked at her shaky hands, realization dawning on her. She was supposed to be happy with these newfound abilities but honestly, she didn’t know how to feel. Kylo stretched his arm out towards the shocked women. “Join me. I can teach you how to control it.” “I’ll never join you.” (Y/N) spat yet she didn’t completely understand what he was saying. Kylo grimaced at this. He took a step forward. He couldn’t understand how he couldn’t access the Force on Earth yet she could.

“You don’t understand the honor of having this abili-” (Y/N) cut him off by using the Force, pushing him to the other block where his lightsaber was. Slowly, (Y/N) lowered her arm down and stared at her hand. “This is some Supernatural type shit.” She breathlessly chuckles before she spots Kylo running towards her with rage in his eyes. 

“Shit!” (Y/N) started to run as fast as her legs could give. Slamming the car door, she barely escapes as Kylo nearly breaks the rear window. (Y/N) watched her center mirror as Kylo stood there, watching the car speed away. “Jesus.” She exhaled as she entered the highway. Even though Kylo was nowhere near her, she checked her mirrors every second on the way to base.

(Y/N) had to tell Rey.

im so sorry for not updating sooner!

@multi-madison @treestarrrrrrrr @holybatflapexpert @bonza-bear @ren-ni @reejero @bitch-imma-head-out @1-800-starmora @infinity-star-wars @tachibubu @kingbouji3

[doctor243]

The End of the World

So this is an new IronWidow story that I am still putting together. I was just gonna do it as a one-shot but BOOM suddenly I had 5000+ words so why stop now, I thought lol. Let me know what you think^^

Summary: “This is how the world ends. Not with a bang, but with a......” or How I feel Endgame should have been written.

Pairing: Tony Stark x Natasha Romanoff

Chapter 1: Irony

Irony was a terrible thing.

The world was in a terrible state. Everyone had lost somebody, the economy had tanked, and the world was basically in a state of confusion and disarray. Questions that no one could answer were flooding the world, like “Why is there no more electricity in my city?”

Because the people needed to maintain the power plants were snapped away.

“Why is the highway jammed with cars?”

Because the drivers got snapped away.

“Why are half the buildings in New York razed to the ground?”

Because there are three airports in the vicinity of Manhattan and half of the pilots flying planes in the air space got snapped away.

“Why is my mother gone?”

Because…

Tony looked out the window of the common area, eyes soaking in the dishevelled state of the city. He nursed his glass of whiskey as he watched the dark clouds roll their way into his line of sight.

Because we failed.

He closed his eyes tightly with a sigh and a lone tear slid down his cheek. A stabbing pain shot through his heart as he remembered Pepper’s smile – tender, teasing and truthful. Then he nearly collapsed when he remembered being told how she had died when a car had smashed into her when the driver had been snapped away. She left only their two year-old Morgan as her legacy, who was now sleeping soundly in bed.

Because I failed.

“Why is the whiskey gone?”

Tony turned around, hastily wiping the tear from his cheek, finding Natasha glaring at the empty bottles by the liquor cabinet as if they had committed a personal offense against her. He smiled tiredly.

“It was gone before I got here,” he replied, deliberately taking a sip from his glass.

She cocked an eyebrow at him in amusement, smirking as though she was about to come back with a witty comment. But she didn’t. She just looked at him and he could see that underneath her casualness and humour, the same pain and exhaustion that haunted him haunted her too. She felt the same disappointment and resignation that he did, and she had come to the living room for the same reason as him. He stepped towards the liquor cabinet, placing his glass down on a table.

“You know what?” He asked, suddenly. “It’s not even a good time for whiskey. It’s raining – it’s perfect for hot chocolate.”

Natasha raised an eyebrow at him questioningly. He hadn’t realised how much he’d missed that fiery look. Her willingness to challenge anyone and anything they said; her refusal to be intimidated by super-intellect and super-strength. In the two years that Cap had whisked away the Rogues and been on the run, Tony had been angry. He had been absolutely livid. But he still knew that their absence left a hole in the fabric of the Avengers, a missing part of its soul.  

“Hot chocolate?” Natasha repeated.

“Yes,” he answered decidedly. “Hot chocolate,” he pulled out a bottle of Irish Cream, “and a pot of gold.”

Natasha smiled in agreement. “I’ll start on the hot chocolate,” she turned to the kitchen.

“No,” Tony said, looking out of the window, where the rain pelted down like bullets from Thanos’ ships and the thunder shouted angrily after the flashes of lightning. “I’ll get the hot chocolate. You build the blanket fort.”

This time both eyebrows were raised at him. Somewhere in the back of his mind he was rather proud of himself, and he made a mental note to elicit that response from her as often as possible. “A blanket fort?” She asked incredulously. “Tony how many drinks did you have before I got here?”

“I’ve never built a blanket fort before,” he pointedly ignored her, pushing her in the direction of the couches. “Then again, I never did have a childhood or friends growing up.” It wasn’t a statement aimed at garnering sympathy, just a fact.

“And you think I did?” She asked again, almost offended.

“You’ve definitely built more makeshift covers in the wild than I have,” he replied methodically, putting the kettle on and pulling out the cocoa. “Spare blankets in the drawers.”

Nat sighed in resignation as she pulled out the twenty blankets that Tony referred to and got to work. She didn’t think it’d take this much effort just to get a fucking drink.

In the end, she was definitely very proud of herself. She’d utilised the couch cushions and the chairs to produce what seemed more like a blanket tent.

“Now that is a masterpiece,” Tony approached with two mugs of steaming Irish Hot Chocolate, clearly impressed. “Let’s do this.”

Once they were inside and comfortably situated, Natasha took a sip and groaned in pleasure. “Holy shit, Stark,” she hastily took another mouthful. “This has got to be the best thing I’ve ever tasted.”

“Well, there’s more where that came from,” Tony sipped with a smile. “I’m just impressed you found a lantern to bring in here.”

“You were taking so long I had the time to go to Cap’s storeroom,” she rolled her eyes.

Tony snorted. “Remember when he would go down there and do weekly checks on his field pack? As if we were going to send him into the woods at any moment?”

Natasha laughed fondly. “The stuff in there was from World War II!” She took another sip. “Still acting like he was in boot camp.”

They sat there in their fortress of blankets and memories, taking turns to refill their drinks of comfort, and reminiscing about days gone by. At one point they added vodka-laced whipped cream which, surprisingly, Tony made from scratch.

Time was an obscure construct for them, and at a certain point, when all the bottles (how many were there again?) of Bailey’s and all the cocoa had been expanded, Tony closed his eyes and sighed. They were both past the point of inebriation, but hadn’t that been the point?

“Irony is a bitch,” he whispered.

“What’d you mean?” Nat asked. They were both on their backs, staring at the ceiling of sheets and the lantern turned off.

“How long has it been?” he asked quietly.

“Since what?” Natasha mumbled.

“Since you guys killed Thanos?” he answered.

Natasha was silent for a little bit, sobering slightly. “6 months,” she replied finally.

Tony wished to God that he had been there, but he had just returned from Titan with Nebula. He had been too dehydrated, malnourished, and emotionally incapacitated from hearing the news about Pepper’s premature departure.

“Everybody lost somebody,” he finally explained. “It wasn’t just 50 percent of the world. Other people died too in the aftermath.”

“I know,” Natasha turned to look at him.

“Everything’s gone to shit,” he gritted out. “And yet…” he reached to his Arc Reactor and squeezed it, as though it were some kind of comfort. “And yet the irony is, he was right,” he wheezed out.

Natasha sat up. Even in her state, she knew she had to hear this, whether to agree or disagree.

“I lost Peter, Pepper and Happy,” he choked out. “But the world is slowly healing, world governments are putting selfish agendas aside and actually working together, and pollution has gone down exponentially. World peace and world hunger pretty much solved.” His body shook at every word he forced out.

“Tony…” Natasha placed a hand on his shoulder, and as she stared into his tear-filled eyes, she knew he didn’t believe himself.  

“Was the price worth it?” Tony was sobbing at this point. “Was he actually right?”

Natasha sighed and slipped her arms around his head and pulled him into an embrace, which he immediately returned, crying unabashedly. She knew that he knew the answer; he just needed to hear it from someone else.

“Of course not,” she whispered soothingly. “Nothing is worth losing lives for.” Tony sobbed even harder at this. “Not one,” she continued. “And certainly not half of all lives.” He never loosened his grip, and eventually Natasha started humming a song he’d never heard before. “We don’t trade lives, Tony,” she said at one point. They stayed that way for a while, him breathing in her scent while she played with his hair and hummed. He always knew that she’d been the heart of the team, helping to centre the strongest heads and to be the voice of unity. She’d turned the team into a family, and he lost that when she left with Steve.

“Let’s leave New York,” he said suddenly.

Natasha pulled away to look at him in the eyes. “What?” There was that eyebrow of question again.

“Let’s leave this building and go somewhere else,” he looked at her with determination from his red, wet eyes. “I have some property in Georgia, by the lake. And we can build a cabin. You can have your own room, and Morgan can be away from all the carnage in this city.”

“Tony, we have responsibilities to carry out,” she argued.

“Which we will be able to carry out with a change of environment,” he replied. This seemed like a better and better idea with each passing minute. “Cap will stay in New York and we’ll be able to contact our foreign friends when I build the hologram communicators into the cabin. C’mon Nat, I need to take Morgan to a place she doesn’t have to witness pain and suffering on a daily basis, and I can’t watch her alone. I can barely take care of myself.”

She thought about it silently, but the breaking in his voice took the strength out of her denial. The truth was that she needed a change as well, and the constant reminders of failures in her everyday life did not help. She needed time to heal. They needed to heal.

“Okay,” she whispered, returning to hugging him. He pulled her closer in response, clearly satisfied with her answer. Where do you turn when there’s nowhere left to go? What do you do when you’ve lost everything? “Okay,” she repeated.

Let me know what you think guys^^

Next Chapter: Here

Masterlist: Here

Tags: @littlemsstark3000​ @katebishopofearth​ @black-ironwidow​ @ironwidow​ @ironwidoww​ @natashastarkotp​ @ironwidow10​ @natashastark3000​ @latinatasharomanoff​ @616tonesnat​ @natashastarkov​ @generationmemes​ @queeenpersephone​

[femreader]

Not everything - Wanda Maximoff

Summary: The last thing Wanda thought before dusting away was how the love of her life was ripped away from her, right in front of her. The truth just couldn’t be more wrong. 

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x fem!reader

Trigger Warning:  Death, cursing, angst, fluff at the end

Part two

Wanda had never really thought about death before her family was ripped away from her. After Pietro’s death, dying had been something that was almost normal to the witch, sadly. She didn’t fear it nor did she really care about it. Every mission she went to she went with a mindset of “I’ll probably die or not, let’s see”. She didn’t think less of herself, she knew the abilities she had. But she did think less of death. She didn’t fear it in any shape or form. 

Then you came into the plans and Wanda was whipped immediately. The way you carried yourself, how you looked after everyone and kept everything together even in the toughest situations. She was so in love with you and your persona after knowing you for just a few weeks. 

And you made her better in her opinion. You gave her a reason to actually live through the missions. Something to come home to. But it also made her fear again, not her own death but yours. It haunted her in her dreams, that someday you’d be ripped away from her like everyone else were. She dreaded it, even though you assured her it would be okay. That you’d always come back to her. And you did, even if there were some close calls, you always came back to her. 

Then the battle at Wakanda happened. 

You were fighting alongside Steve and Thor, using your trusted sword as your weapon. The grip you had on the familiar weapon that had served you for so many years was so tight your knuckles were white. One alien, another. You weren’t sure how long it had been like that. You just kept killing every alien that came across you, time to time helping someone else.. Your body was running on pure adrenaline, your muscles didn’t ache, your body didn’t tire. It was like you were in flow. 

Slowly but surely you found yourself with the Avengers by the edge of the forest. The creeps ran down your back but you pushed the thought away. Slicing another alien you gave a cocky smirk to your girlfriend who just shook her head. It was amazing how gorgeous she still looked, even though her face was smeared with alien blood. You tore your gaze away and thrust your weapon into another alien. 

Thanos came through the portal. You were one of the last men standing. Steve was down, Bruce was quite literally stuck in stone and Thor was only god knows where. You heard thunder somewhere in the distance. You did your best to stop the mad titan from getting the last stone, Vision. The grunts and cries that left your mouth hurt Wanda so deeply she would’ve rather fought Thanos himself. 

“Wan- Ugh, Wanda,” Your shouts were strained and she turned to look at you. The tears were blinding her eyes, your salty waterfalls were already streaming down your cheeks. You looked at Vision knowingly, he knew it too. He nodded. You took another hit before slicing the mad titan to his arm, it barely made him wince. 

Whatever it takes. 

“Destroy it!” 

She shook her head, tears running down her face. Vision was the closest thing she had after you. He was her friend, closest friend she had ever had beside her brother. And you hated that she had to do this, but she was more powerful than you. She was the only one ho could od this. Wanda felt like she was killing you by killing him. You screamed her to do it again and again until your throat was raw. 

Thanos hit you square in the head basically and lifted your weak body from the ground by your neck. 

“You’re weak, small... a pathetic little human,” his voice gnarled as he looked down at you. Your face started to go red, but it did not falter. 

“I... am... not... giving up,” You looked at him with determination, your hands on his gigantic wrist and felt the sharp blade enter your stomach. He dropped you on the ground and the last thing you’d ever hear was the pained cries of your girlfriend, who was holding back the mad Titan, destroying the stone and watching the life slowly bleed out of you. 

***

Wanda didn’t fear death, not if you were gone too. It was done, they had lost. Thanos snapped the gauntlet and a weird feeling filled the witch. She held your limp body on her lap, watching as the normally rosy cheeks were paling. Her gaze moved to the sky and she felt her feeling numbing. It wasn’t worth to fight anymore if you were gone now too. As life slowly moved away from her body, she could almost hear your laugh in the distance. Your voice filled her head, memories flashing by her eyes.

I’ll be with you soon...

But she wouldn’t.

The opposite actually.

The surgery was difficult, especially since half of the medication staff had disappeared in Wakanda. Really it was a miracle you even survived. Twice your heart flat lined but they got it back working. Natasha had been there the whole time, following as you were unconsciously fighting for your life, holding back tears every time the heart monitor made a flat sound. 

Then they moved you to the HQ. Steve, Thor, Natasha, Rocket, Carol the whole team went to find Thanos and rewind the whole mess. It didn’t go the way they expected it to go through. It was impossible to bring everyone back. The stones were gone. You woke up while they were gone. To say you were panicking was an understatement. Half of the population was gone, the news was filled with sorrow and families looking for each other. 

And now you were going to have to live without Wanda forever. It made you wish you would’ve actually died. It would have been less painful that way. 

Five years. You didn’t speak with anyone about it, you woke up, trained, went outside and helped the less fortunate. Then got back home and went to sleep. Repeat, that over and over again for five years. The sword was in a trunk, buried deep under all of the books and letters there was. You hadn't even cleaned it from the battle. You couldn't see it. You couldn't bear that. A couple of times you fell into a drinking spiral but there was always someone, usually Steve or Natasha to help you back onto your feet.

The miracle called Scott Lang felt too good to be real once he came. Five years, five fucking years, the slowest years of your life and now there was a man talking about time traveling. At first, it was too good to be true, it wasn’t... it couldn’t work. It would be nearly impossible. Nearly. 

But you did it anyway.  And lost another member.

Then Bruce snapped and you waited. The HQ went silent, Clint’s phone rang and his wife spoke. The man broke into tears right then and there, that was the moment you knew... you knew she was back. Somewhere. One phone call away.  As you went to grab your phone the whole place blew up and the hell was loose. You were fortunate enough to not be completely buried by the building.  

Somehow you had managed to find your trusted sword in the middle of all the mess, it still had the blood of the old aliens on it as you had not used it after the battle on Wakanda. You felt determination fill you and you gripped your weapon tightly in your hands as the portals around you and Steve appeared. Literal chills ran down our back and legs and you coudln’t wipe off a smirk from your face when the alien army in front of you watched gobsmacked. Your feet tingled, you couldn't stay still. You already wanted to face the titan and fulfill your promise to him. 

“Avengers...” Steve breathed out. “Assemble”

And like that, you were fighting again. Left and right, fury filling you. The aliens were dropping dead by your feet faster than Thor could summon the hammer. It was rather scary, to be honest. The small teenaged boy Peter had to keep away from you in case you didn’t recognize him, not that you’d ever actually hurt your own team members. It was still quite intimidating how many aliens you made a pile of in just a couple of minutes. It reminded them why you were made an avenger in the first place. 

It was when Thanos was walking towards the gauntlet you saw her again. And holy shit was she gorgeous. Not aged a day, unlike you who was five years older. Wanda’s eyes were red, literally like glowing and the familiar swirls Hydra had given her were dangerously big and glowing ever so brightly. Her voice was venomous as she spoke to the Mad Titan in anger and fury, chest heaving up and down.  

“You took, everything from me.”

“I don’t even know who you are.”

“You will,” She said monotone and levitated upwards, her arms resting on either side of her. You followed as she kept punching the titan with all of her powers. Her whole body was glowing in a different way, you hadn’t ever seen her so... mad. She was dangerously angry. And you couldn’t help but applause her for it. It was kinda hot, to be honest.

When Thanos ordered the shooting you snapped out of your trance. Wanda was still holding him back, not caring if she was smashed to death. Once an energy ball hit her, missing her just by a foot she fell over on the ground, momentarily losing her hold on the mad titan. One of his soldiers took notice of the action and went to raise their sword, ready to plunge it into Wanda’s body. 

“Not my fucking girlfriend you asshole,” You grumbled as you ran at the alien and made sure to shove your sword straight through its neck, the only weak spot in their armor. The alien tried to move, to do anything to get out of the pain but you just twisted the sword tighter, until the soldier fell onto the ground and left you there, breathless and a splash of odd colored blood on your chest, neck, and face.

Wanda’s knees buckled underneath her when she saw you. Her eyes returned into their respectful but not any less beautiful color you hadn’t seen in so long. She breathed out your name, so softly you couldn’t even hear it, you could only see her mouth your name like it was just the two of you in the comfort of your bed.

 You took her into your arms and you sat on the ground, holding her head against your shoulder and her waist against yours. It was the best feeling you had felt in five years. Her scent you had on your old clothes now filled your nose and refreshed your memory. Her red hair tickled you face as you moved to kiss her. 

“Not everything,” You mumbled against her lips and Wanda couldn’t do anything else than sob dryly. Her hands went to your face and she leaned her forehead against you. 

She hadn’t lost everything. She hadn’t lost you.