#it’s kind of weird which made it more likable

[chaifootsteps]

the writers have put themselves in a really weird spot with Stolas tbh

they could have had him admit he made the deal initially just for sex then caught feelings and now wants to end the deal

instead they retconned it that he was sort of in love with Blitzo this whole time, so now he's breaking the deal because he assumed they were in some kind of situationship when they weren't the whole time

like in trying to make him look more sympathetic they've made Stolas look way more delusional and detached from both common sense or any empathetic understanding of how Blitzo is feeling about him or the deal

so it's just like he's surprised pikachu face all the time when Blitzo behaves like their relationship is just a transactional business thing - because it is; that's all it's ever been to Blitzo

idk, s2 Stolas just comes off way dumber than Murder Family Stolas who was written like he knew full well what he was doing and wasn't watching telenovelas and projecting onto the female lead, which says so much about how Stolas sees himself as this Poor Pining Sweetheart than what he actually is

a predator who treated his one night stand like a sex on demand machine

Agree with all of this. Viv seems to think that after an entire season of playing Stolas's unforgivable treatment of Blitz and Blitz's disgust for comedy, that she can just sort of pretend it didn't happen. I don't think she's mature enough or a competent enough writer to realize that allowing Stolas to be that awful person who did that awful thing and then doing something with that would almost certainly make him more likable than just pretending the awful thing wasn't awful.

He's her favorite character and allowing him to have flaws more egregious than "loves too much" and "prone to misunderstandings" might mean people criticizing or -- god forbid! -- disliking him, and she can't have that.

[stroebe2]

As I expected the sound was fucking loud lmaooo feeling the bass in the walls and the seats but also what a wild ride how do you just get out of a theater and get on with your life after being exposed to 3 hours of movie about the worst evil humanity has ever conjured what if I killed myself

[ecoamerica]

Watch the 2024 American Climate Leadership Awards for High School Students now: https://youtu.be/5C-bb9PoRLc

The recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by student climate leaders! Join Aishah-Nyeta Brown & Jerome Foster II and be inspired by student climate leaders as we recognize the High School Student finalists. Watch now to find out which student received the $25,000 grand prize and top recognition!

[snake-and-mouse]

Idk man it's just... weird that Watcher wants me to give them money so they can... make their shows less likable? Cuz the more expensive their shows got, the less I liked them. All my favourites are the ones that could be made in a basement with four hours and a hundred bucks. Or ones built off of fan content. Honestly Too Many Spirits is the only one I keep up with anymore. Ghost Files feels overproduced and formulaic now because it relies more on graphics and tech and shit, and less on actual Ryan and Shane, the reason people watch. The human element is what sells their shows, which is kind of the hallmark of youtube, which they now say they don't fit as. It feels really, like they don't know why they have fans. Dish granted? I loved, but not because it was oooohh fancy expensive food!!! But because the like, really cool concept of throwing yourself into making something difficult and complicated that you've never made before, just to be special for one person and make their day, and then sit and have a meal together. During pandemic that really hit something. So touting Worth It??? As an incentive to follow them to Watchertv? A big red sign their idea of good content is going to continue to diverge from why I ever watched them. They really want us to pay them to make shows for them, not us.

[flower-boi16]

Top 5 Best & Worst Characters in Hellaverse

So, for the most part, Hellaverse has pretty meh to bad characters. Buuuuut, there are a few decent/good ones, so, just for fun, let's go over the top 5 best AND worst characters in Hellaverse (in my opinion).

5. (Worst) Stella

So Stella. Stella, Stella, Stella...you had so much potential to be interesting...but you just...aren't. Just for the record I don't think making Stella abusive is a retcon since it doesn't contradict any of her past behavior in season 1 minus like...one background painting.

That's not really my problem with Stella being abusive. My problem is that it makes her boring and the show does that as a way to woobify Stolas. Really not much to say, she's just...boring.

5. (Best) Octavia

It's pretty funny how Octavia is pretty much the most beloved character in the critical community. She's both decently likable and is a bit interesting when you look at her, as she's a girl who was negatively affected by her fathers' actions and is dealing with the negative changes that have happened to her due to her parents always arguing...

...also her father is Stolas so she is therefore the most sympathetic character by default. Really, there aren't that many good characters in either Hazbin or Helluva, and Octavia isn't an amazing character, she only appears in like, two episodes, but she's still fine by herself and is one of Viv's better characters.

4. (Worst) Charlie

I already made a full post about the issues with my problems with Charlie as a character so I won't once again go very deeply here. You're probably wondering why Charlie is even here to begin with since I stated that I don't exactly hate her.

...well, just because I don't hate a character doesn't really mean I like that character. A majority of Hazbin's characters have similar problems of not being that developed at all and the development they do have often feels rushed. The reason why I put Charlie as the 4th worst character in Hellaverse is because, well, out of every character in Hazbin's main cast...Charlie is just kind of the one with the biggest issues.

Again, I already talked about my issues with Charlie in my post about her but just to recap; Charlie suffers from being heavily underdeveloped, she isn't a very compelling protagonist and has 0 growth throughout the show. She learns absolutely nothing. Her mentality is never once challenged by the narrative and she is always portrayed as right and anyone who disagrees with her is automatically wrong, and she also feels heavily overshadowed by the rest of the cast despite being the main character.

Charlie is also not the best person at times like some people have pointed out (she KNOWS THAT ANGEL IS BEING ABUSED and she chooses not to do anything about it. Wow, what a great friend), and overall she kinda sucks as a protagonist.

4. (Best) Lucifer

I've seen Lucifer gain a lot of flak from people with them calling him a bad person and it's not entirely unjustified. I can definitely understand why it may be hard to sympathize with the guy who literally greenlit annual genocides of his own people because he thought that they deserved death.

Not to mention him calling Charlie a "failure" in the pilot which is just...never addressed here. Also it's fairly weird that despite Lucifer being the sin of pride...he isn't really prideful of anything...? So ya, there a few issues with Lucifer as a character.

In spite of that though, I don't think that Lucifer is a particularly bad character. If anything, he's actually one of the more well-developed of the main cast and he has an arc that's decently compelling...?

He initially started out as a dreamer, someone with many creative and imaginative ideas for Heaven, but his ideas were always rejected and he was seen as a troublemaker by the elders of Heaven.

After he was cast down to Hell as punishment for accidentally letting evil seep into the world, he lost his will to dream and fell into depression, having a heavily cynical view of Heaven and Hell due to his past experiences. He closes himself off and doesn't stay in contact with his loved ones, mainly his daughter due to his depression. He tries convincing Charlie into his cynical views because he doesn't want his own daughter to face the same crushing rejection he faced.

However, he reconnects with his daughter and brings back a spark in him that was lost long ago, and he promises to support Charlie and her dreams, despite his depression not immediately disappearing.

Admittedly that part is pretty rushed, like Charlie just says "but dad...mah people!!!!" and he's just like "ok". Again, it's not perfect and has some small issues, but compared to most of Hazbin and Helluva's other characters, Lucifer's arc is far more well-developed and is interesting in it's own right. If anything, Lucifer thinking that his people deserve death simply shows his cynical mindset that he's had for years, and Charlie's able to bring back that dreamer that was crushed long ago.

So ya. Lucifer is not amazing, but I like him. He's neat.

3. (Worst) Chaz

Chaz sucks. Chaz is a character that only exists just to make a bunch of unfunny sex jokes and nothing else. He is completely one-dimensional and is nothing more than a walking sex joke. And his "jokes" aren't even remotely funny.

I really don't have much to even say about Chaz. He's just THAT one-note.

3. (Best) Velvvette

I've talked about my thoughts on Velvvette before so I won't go too in depth here again. Buuut needless to say I think she's probably my favorite character in hellaverse. She's one of the few antagonists Viv's made that's actually entertaining and fun to watch, with a well-developed and charismatic personality that's not just "asshole who swears a lot". She isn't the best character in hellaverse though, but she has far more depth as a character compared to most of the other antagonists.

2. (Worst) Adam

I've spoken about my thoughts on Adam before multiple times so at this point I don't know if I have anything left to say about him. Adam is a boring, one-dimensional character with very little depth or personality as a character. He only exists just to be a pure straw character so he can be proven wrong by Charlie.

He can't have any real depth as a character because he only exists just to be torn down by the story. Again, already talked about that in a previous post so I won't go too in-depth here, but needless to say...ya, Adam still sucks.

2. (Best) Alastor

Like Lucifer, I've seen Alastor gain a heavy amount of criticism but personally, like Lucifer, I think Alastor is one of the better characters in the main cast. The has a sense of mystery and intrigue to him that makes him pretty interesting as a character. You're left wondering what his whole deal is & what he's planning.

That combined with Alastor's charisma makes him an entertaining antagonist for the show. He's one of the few characters that I'm interested in to see what they do with in the next season. So ya, I like Alastor...

Now time to get to a character that makes me want to punch myself in the face.

1. (Worst) Stolas

.....Honeslty what can even be said about Stolas that hasn't already been said? I've made so many posts complaining about this stupid owl and you already know my opinion of him at this point. If you really want to know every single critique of Stolas I have, read every post I've made that's tagged "anti stolas". But...I'll just say this.

Stolas could have been a good character. Hell, he could have been the show's BEST character. He had all the potential to be super interesting and compelling character with a great arc...but instead, Viv decided to completely retcon everything season 1 established in order to try and make Stolas an UwU soft boy the show REALLY wants us to sympathize for, in spite of Stolas being a bad person.

I'm sorry if I can't sympathize with the guy who SA's an lower class imp for his own pleasure and frequently neglects his own daughter and pays more attention to st. imp. And, as an artificial way to make Stolas sympathetic, the narrative has to wipe away any actual flaws he has and demonize any character that even remotely gets upset at his actions (which I talk about here), because god forbid we hold Stolas accountable for ANYTHING right? We have to coddle and absolve him of ALL his mistakes despite his flaws being what made him interesting in the first place.

Stolas NEVER grows or develops as a character because of this and so he has basically no character arc. Not only is he a poorly written mess of a character...he's also just BORING now. There's nothing interesting about him anymore, he's just an UwU sad sack. He had so much potential to be interesting but that potential was completely wasted in favor of this bullshit.

And THAT's what makes Stolas SO FRUSTRATING. Really, he pretty much represents HB, and, to an extent, all of Hellaverse as a whole; it started out good with a lot of interesting ideas and potential but through bad writing, all of that potential got squandered and now we're just left with a completely disappointing mess.

Stolas is the worst character in the show because he's the only one who legitimately FRUSTERATES me. He's my least favorite character in all of fiction and a complete mess.

1. (Best) Sera

I already talked about Sera before in a previous post so I won’t go too in depth here, but Sera is one of hellaverse’ better antagonists for having more depth and nuance as a character. She’s the head seraphim of Heaven and greenlit exterminations in order to protect Heaven….and Emily.

In spite of that though, she clearly doesn’t want to do this and is only doing it because she wanted to try and protect her people, and Emily, who she clearly cares deeply for as her older sister. She’s a lot more compelling as a character that most of hellaverse’ antagonists, not being good or evil but rather morally grey, having nuances to her as a character.

To me, Sera is the best character in all of Hellaverse because she's the one with the most nuance and depth compared to 90% of Viv's other characters, especially her antagonists. She actually has REAL DEPTH and complexities to her that make her a lot more interesting compared to most of Viv's characters. Hell, most of the characters in the best list are put there BECAUSE they are just more developed than most of the other characters (which just shows how bad Viv is at character writing)

Like Alastor, she's one of the few characters that I am interested in seeing what they do next with season 2, as she is likely going to get a redemption there. Well just have to see. But for now, Sera is the best character in all of Hellaverse.

So...ya...that was my top 5 best and worst characters in Hellaverse...

....bye.

[venusin-aries]

SJM made Gwyn so likable and so damn hard to hate that it has people reaching to astronomical lengths to make her villainous or -insignificant to the rest of the series- and I think that is. Fucking. Hilarious. 

Like she KNEW people were going to hate Gwyn so she decided to make it as difficult as possible and I think that is Iconic Behavior. 

I am going to laugh when Gwyn is revealed to be everything she’s projected herself to be. Which is, so far,

Kind and sweet. 

Feisty. 

Brave. 

Smart as all fucking hell. 

Charmingly irreverent. 

As beautiful as Mor and Merrill. 

A talented singer. 

Strategic and observant. 

Loyal. She’s such a good fucking friend, we should ALL be more like Gwyn. 

Resilient. 

Adaptable. 

I could go on and on.  

When Gwyn is revealed to be a good person, no matter if she’s a lightsinger or some other miscellaneous creature, and she doesn’t have to ~lure~ anyone or force someone to do something against their will (which is a really weird thing to accuse an SA victim of, call me sensitive or whatever, I don’t care she’s not real, I find it weird and gross and oddly telling of the people who came up with that theory) and her friends still adore her, I am going to laugh. my. fucking. ass off. 

Full offense, I think just having a glimpse into Gwyn’s recovery, her being willing to sacrifice herself to protect the kids, BECAUSE SHE VERY MUCH WAS READY TO DIE FOR THEM, what was going through her mind when she refused to tell the general where they went, how she feels about losing her sister in such a brutal way BECAUSE she refused to tell him, the attack that followed, her nightmares, the guilt she carries, and the aftermath of the blood rite from her point of view would be so much more interesting than anything Elriel as a whole has got going on right now. I would read an entire book about just HER.

I find her so admirable and I find it so odd people dislike her because there’s a chance her and Azriel will end up together. 

I genuinely laugh when I see how odd some takes are and how angry people get about her.

Go listen to some synth music. Go on what I call a Final Girl walk and breathe some fresh air. You’ll be okay if or when your ship does not end up together. 

[macdenlover]

autistic charlie kelly is actually sooo special to me but especially because of how it’s treated in the context of the show. it never feels like they’re making fun of the autistic traits themselves but instead how they act as a catalyst in the situations that charlie or the rest of the gang end up in. for example charlie misinterpreting something someone said or taking something too literally is never the end of the joke— the payoff comes with him doubling down on it or interrupting them to come back to his ridiculous point. or when it’s him having these silly little arbitrary routines and rituals and being super specific about the niche foods he eats or the sensory experiences he tries to find in weird places or the random fixations he has on certain topics— the joke isn’t these traits themselves, it’s how they interact with this character specifically and the choices that he makes. the joke is always charlie, not his autism. and something about the gang being assholes to him actually makes it so endearing?? they don’t pity him the way i’ve seen in even the best cases of autistic representation in other ensemble comedies (looking at you community i love that show and i love abed soo much but sometimes it gets a little depressing seeing how much they hammer in the fact that he’s soo different from everybody). the whole gang being full of weirdo assholes who don’t ever treat him any differently because they’re all way too self centered is kind of awesome. a bunch of other shows with autistic coded characters have done at least one episode where the rest of the group tries to change them to make them more likable or impress a date or something but in the sunny version of that ep they made it very clear from the beginning that they were only trying to get charlie a date because it would bring down the vibe if he killed himself. which is so much funnier and so much more honest than the “we want what’s best for you” angle. and it was way funnier when the date ended up being a huge mess because sometimes being yourself really does not work. BUT AGAIN what was funny about that wasn’t how doomed it was from the start, it was all of the awful choices charlie made when he got nervous. i also love that he’s such a fan favorite character across every side of the fandom because a lot of the things people love about him or at least find strangely charming about him are his autistic traits :’) charlie kelly is weirdly one of the most meaningful but completely unintentional forms of representation i’ve ever stumbled across but idc they managed to do it well and do it right somehow and it makes me so happy.

[ecoamerica]

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

[imagitory]

Review: Wish (2023) [SPOILERS]

Evening, everyone! Tonight my mother and I went to go see Disney's most recent film, Wish, which fortunately came to theaters in my area right before its formal American release date. I'd been very curious to see how this tribute to Disney's last 100 years of filmmaking would turn out, and now that I've seen it...well, I have to be honest, I was a little disappointed. I want to be very clear both that I was going into this with a rather sunny outlook and that there are things I really liked in this film...but overall, it felt like a lot of the good ideas it had were only half-baked, and I found myself -- forgive me -- "wishing for something more" than what we got.

For a more comprehensive deep-dive...a cut!

The Good!

+The single best element in this film for me was Chris Pine's performance as our villain, Magnifico. There are definitely some things I can critique about Magnifico's overall storyline and "character arc" further down, but Chris was clearly having a grand old time being an egotistical, sassy jerkwad, and it totally showed. Even in his villain song This is The Thanks I Get?, which just screamed "passive-aggressive abusive parent," you can hear how much fun Chris was having in the studio, recording it. I just about always enjoyed when Magnifico was on screen, and I actually did really like the idea that a lot of his villainy is rooted in him being obsessed with control over everyone and everything. In a weird way, Magnifico's turn to the Dark Side parallels Anakin Skywalker's in the sense that he lost so much in the past that he's determined to never lose anything important to him again -- especially the power he's accrued to make himself feel strong, after having felt so powerless. I find that very interesting, and I kind of wish that aspect was really highlighted more in the story, but we'll talk about that later.

+Asha was a likable enough heroine, even if I found her to be a lot like a two-way fusion of Mulan and Anna placed in a vaguely Snow-White-ish role in her clearly Seven-Dwarf-inspired friend group. Ariana DeBose portrayed her rather well, both acting and singing-wise. I also liked the "social justice" bent to Asha's character where she wants better things not just for herself and her family, but also Rosas overall -- in the French translation of her main song "This Wish," they even push this further by having Asha wish "to see the world happy again someday." We haven't seen a heroine really express this kind of desire for a positive change in the world since Esmeralda in The Hunchback of Notre Dame, and that's cool! Plus representation in mainstream media for previously underrepresented groups is always nice. ^.^

+As much as I don't think they all got enough focus as individuals, I liked Asha's friend group! Especially the fact that it is a friend group made up of people that are around the same age as our protagonist, which -- let's be honest -- isn't that common for Disney heroines. Often with "sidekick groups," you're more likely to have situations like Cinderella with the mice (who are more like cutesy sidekicks than equals) or Snow White with the Dwarfs (who are all quite a bit older than our heroine)...so a friend group made up of peers with their own personalities and motivations was kind of fun.

+The setting of Rosas itself could be pretty. I liked a lot of the Mediterranean-inspired architecture, especially inside Magnifico's tower.

+The combination of 3D and 2D-esque animation was also interesting! It really served to give the film its own distinctive visual style that sets it apart from other Disney projects, which I always appreciate.

+Star was...cute. Obviously just designed to sell plushies and definitely reminded me way too much of Kirby, but cute enough. I do think it's kind of cool that they're never gendered at all in the entire movie, because it'd be silly to think of a sweet little androgynous ball of stardust as being specifically male or female.

+I liked the idea of Simon "betraying" Asha, only to be turned into a pawn by Magnifico in the process, but not being treated unsympathetically by the story for it. Didn't love the full execution of the idea, but hey, that's what the negative section is for.

+The idea of everyone finding the power inside of themselves to stand up against Magnifico (because they're "all stars," and presumably all have the magic needed to make their wishes come true) was a little predictable, but still sweet. I have problems with how the film wrote it (which we'll get to), but the idea itself was wholesome and fitting.

+I like several of the songs, just on their own -- I added This Wish and Knowing What I Know Now on my ITunes as soon as I first heard them prior to the film's release, and now I've added At All Costs too: it's a really pretty duet! (Gorgeous work, Chris and Ariana!) I'll leave my praise here, though, because sadly the soundtrack is going to get a lot of discussion in the less positive section.

The Not-So-Good...

+This film being "Disney's 100th anniversary film" really got in the way of this movie telling a compelling and unique story sometimes. The whole movie really twisted itself into a pretzel trying to check off all the usual Disney tropes, and there were points that certain choices made the story seem incredibly stilted. For instance, one common Disney trope is a dead parent, so of course Asha has lost her father -- but we learn so little about him and he ends up playing such a small role in Asha's arc and story that it seems like an unnecessary detail. Asha's grandfather honestly plays more of a role in Asha's motivation throughout most of the film, so it would've made just as much sense to have Asha's grandfather be the one who believed in stars having power, rather than her father. Another example is the concept of the cute animal sidekick who's just there to make jokes -- as much as Valentino the goat didn't annoy me personally, he added just about nothing of value to the story whatsoever aside from comic relief, in contrast to other funny sidekicks like Sebastian from The Little Mermaid or Olaf from Frozen, who also serve a plot purpose and have a developed relationship with the protagonists. Then there's Asha being cut from the same "naive, awkward, wide-eyed idealist" cloth as many of our Disney Revival heroines like Anna, Rapunzel, and up to a certain point even Mirabel are; Star being in a similar vein to cutesy, innocent sidekicks like Pua, Crikee, and Baymax while Valentino is more akin to sassier, comic ones like Mushu and Sisu; her friends literally being based on the Seven Dwarfs from Snow White; our heroine getting a pretty standard "I Want" song and the villain getting his own solo number that doesn't really take any risks...oh yes, and we mustn't forget the trope of the Storybook opening, which (I'm sorry) I know was supposed to be a reference to Snow White, Cinderella, and Enchanted, but just gave me Shrek vibes the entire time. I was waiting for Shrek to rip out the page and use it for toilet paper any minute. It just felt a lot of the time like the movie was very paint-by-numbers, rather than throwing in much that was surprising or different.

+This isn't even touching all of the pointless meta references to other Disney movies. Asha wearing the Fairy Godmother's cloak and getting a wand like hers at the end -- the mushrooms crowing "we love crazy!" the way Hans did in Love is an Open Door -- Asha riding the reindeer the way Kristoff did in Frozen 2 -- Magnifico using green smoke hands a la Ursula -- the ending with those obvious Wendy and Peter Pan look-alikes, come on, really??? That was just painful.

+As much as Magnifico was an awesome idea for a character and Chris Pine's performance was beyond entertaining, the movie did not always write him as well as they could've. From the very start, we see this guy is an egotistical control freak -- obsessed with his own image, incredibly hard-to-please, arrogant, vain, desperate for attention and unwavering praise and adoration from all of his subjects, and determined to keep an iron grip on everyone else's wishes because of the power it gives him. He's ALREADY a terrible person, from the start -- and yet the film tries to introduce this dark magic book that gets no explanation or backstory whatsoever and has no real characterization or presence, so it leaves no real impact on the audience corrupting him and making him a bad person, when it didn't need to! Magnifico was already the villain this film needed! Just let him fall head-first into madness without the book prompting anything! Even if Magnifico "lost everything" in the past, that doesn't make him a good person, if he takes everyone's wishes away from them and hoards them all to himself, only to grant a few now and again when it would make him look good.

+This above point actually leads nicely into one change I really, really wish the film had been ballsy enough to make -- have Asha already be Magnifico's apprentice, not trying to become it at the start of the story. Give our villain and hero a real relationship, with history that started before the events of this film! Asha lost her father at the age of 12...how interesting would it have been -- whether to make Magnifico more of an anti-villain or show how manipulative he really is -- if he'd tried to fill that fatherly role for our main character and twist her to serve his ends? What if At All Costs was rewritten to be about Magnifico not just being determined to hold onto all of the kingdom's wishes, but also this apprentice he sees as an extension of him and his legacy, while Asha is determined to protect this Star she's accidentally summoned and the suppressed wish of hers it represents? This change would've made Asha's break with Magnifico so much more powerful for both of them -- it would've both justified Magnifico's descent into madness and given Asha more reason to feel like it was her responsibility to stop Magnifico. You even could've then played more with Asha's relationship with Queen Amaya too, in this kind of a scenario.

+Oh yeah, and on that note, Queen Amaya. OOH, this really annoyed me -- okay. So this woman is supposed to be a good guy, in this story. But as I touched on earlier, Magnifico was already a pretty awful person, hoarding people's wishes away in order to make himself powerful. Was Amaya truly so blind to that? Did she truly never question anything, ever? But no, really, she only turns on Magnifico after he starts using the dark magic book and actively threatens her. Only that makes her turn from him, and it's pretty damn immediate. Now okay, I hear you saying, it's like Amaya sings in Knowing What I Know Now, right? "The good in him, I've watched it melt // I was blinded by the love I felt"? Excuse me, lady -- but Magnifico wasn't a good person, before. He was just playing a part so as to stay powerful and adored by the masses. And if the story wants to claim otherwise, and act like that dark magic book was responsible for Magnifico going bad, then why would our Queen decide to keep him locked up in his staff's crystal forever? If the book was responsible, then Magnifico would be the Frodo or Golum to the book's One Ring -- he'd be a victim, in such a scenario: one in need of help and pity, not punishment. So either Amaya is a selfish person who only cared about her husband's mistreatment of others when it affected her, or she's a needlessly cruel person who decides to punish her husband for a vice that anyone could fall prey to. Either way, I don't want this woman ruling anyone! Make this woman a straight-up villain, same as her husband, and have the whole monarchy come crashing down after she and Magnifico both go down in flames! VIVE LA RESISTANCE! (Playing into my idea with Asha being Magnifico's apprentice all along, maybe there could even be a twist on the Evil Stepmother trope with Amaya, where she's jealous of how much Magnifico has tried to groom Asha as his apprentice, rather than spending time and/or starting a family with her or something.)

+As I touched on earlier, there wasn't even close to enough time to develop all of these characters properly. Since our heroine and friends are most similar to Snow White and her friends the Seven Dwarfs, let's compare cast size. Snow White is 83 minutes long and has a cast of ten (Snow, the Prince, the Queen, and the Dwarfs) -- Wish is 95 minutes long and has a cast of fourteen (Asha, Magnifico, Star, Valentino, Amaya, Asha's mum and grandpa, and our seven Friends). This results in us getting the vague idea that "Grumpy" role Gabo is sweet on our "Bashful" role Bazeema, but no time to develop their relationship or give it any kind of conclusion; the others saying "Sneezy" role Safi apparently loves the castle chickens with no sympathetic explanation why, to the point that he gets super excited about a chicken growing to a giant size for no real reason; "Doc" role Dahlia having a crush on Magnifico that is then dropped immediately after Asha turns against him; oldest kid and "Sleepy" role Simon feeling incomplete without the dream he gave Magnifico and "betraying" Asha as a result in an attempt to get it back, only to get stabbed in the back by Magnifico, and then have no time for a proper redemption after he's unhypnotized; Asha's grandfather turning on a dime about whether or not he wants to know what his wish was if Magnifico thought it was dangerous; Magnifico getting some justification in his backstory for his bad behavior, but Amaya's backstory being a complete black hole before she married Magnifico when you'd think it'd explain all the more why she stuck with him so long; and Asha's mum having her wish crushed to dust by Magnifico and then given back without us EVER LEARNING WHAT IT EVEN WAS IN THE FIRST PLACE, even after we see just about everyone else's wishes as soon as somebody picks it up and Asha's mum's wish gets picked up multiple times!! Come on, if you're going to set up NOT showing it, you may as well have a pay-off for it!! At least give us some moment where Asha's mum hugs her in relief and acknowledges that her daughter was her wish! That would've been a nice "aww" moment for everyone!

+Okay, I said I was going to talk about my problem with the songs, so here goes. As I said before, I listened to the soundtrack before watching the movie, and even when I did, I could immediately sense a problem: these songs did not tell me much of anything about the movie, just on their own. Welcome to Rosas, which is pretty much just an exposition dump about the kingdom and how Magnifico founded it, didn't really paint a picture of our setting or characters much at all, the way opening songs like Belle or The Family Madrigal do. This Wish, although pretty, was something I could hear just as easily on the radio -- it didn't feel as tied or necessary to understanding our heroine the way something like Part of That World does. I'm a Star, quite frankly, felt like a lot of inspirational word salad, rather than anything particularly memorable or revelatory -- why else wouldn't it even be worthy of a musical salute in the reprise, where Asha remembers that she and everyone else are stars during the climax? Even after reading summaries of the plot and spoilers from the storybook for this film, I could not figure out for the life of me how At All Costs would fit organically into such a story, being sung by our villain and hero. It wasn't until I saw the film that I saw how the filmmakers decided to fit it in and honestly...the song didn't help tell that particular scene at all. It's a really pretty song and I like it a lot -- but it lacked any of the irony or contrast that kind of a scene that introduces the difference in focus between our hero and villain required. If the scene itself is needed to understand what's supposed to be going on while the song is playing, then the song is not effectively telling the story and is therefore unnecessary. There wasn't even a particularly Spanish or Mediterranean flair to the soundtrack to help set the stage, aside from the occasional flourish of castanets -- instead it sounded very contemporary, which I guess is appropriate, since it was largely written by pop composers rather than any musical theater talent.

+There were also points where the songs felt the urge to shove in a bunch of extra words just because, rather than have the words flow well and really mean something. I'm a Star is most guilty of this, of course, but even in This is the Thanks I Get?, we hear Magnifico gripe that "I let you live here for free and I don't even charge you rent" -- mate, THAT MEANS THE SAME THING! If you live somewhere for free, then you are NOT paying rent!

+Knowing What I Know Now is a bop and I like it (aside from Amaya's stupidity), but I'm sorry, all I can think when I hear it is "This is clearly trying to be Ready as I'll Ever Be from Tangled the Animated Series, but that song blows this out of the water." However fun the song can be, it would've been so much stronger if it actually addressed the contrast between the characters and revved us up for a big final battle, instead of it just being our eight underdeveloped characters psyching each other up.

+The idea of everyone being stars was a lovely idea, but the execution of Asha remembering this fact and using it to defeat Magnifico was terribly handled. First off, there was no revelatory phrase or action that prompted Asha to remember this fact, so her suddenly saying that "they're all stars" came out of nowhere. Second, even putting aside that there'd be no way any of her friends could hear Asha from all the way up on the tower if they're stuck in the courtyard below, there's no reason I can see for Asha's friends or family to know what the hell she was even TALKING about. They weren't there when the I'm a Star number happened! And the way that number made it seem, just based on the visuals, it looked like the "star" power came from a person's dream, since it's the same glow that returns to Asha's grandfather when he gets his dream back, but most of the town's dreams have been already yanked out by Magnifico at this point! I think the idea is that since everyone is a star, even with that big piece of them and the power accompanying it taken out, they still have enough stardust inside of them to be powerful enough to chase their heart's desires...but yeah, I'm sorry, for all the word salad I'm a Star threw around, this world-building aspect was really not made clear, and because of that and the lack of a proper callback to this plot turn, the climax didn't hit as strong as it should've.

Overall, this film felt a lot like a batch of unbaked chocolate chip cookies that someone decided to throw a bunch of brightly colored sprinkles on top of, just because they could. A lot of ideas just don't feel like they were fully developed, and there was a lot tossed in that didn't contribute to the overall taste or bring the disparate elements together in a cohesive whole, instead feeling more like a distraction than anything of actual substance. That doesn't mean I couldn't eat it -- I like eating cookie dough as much as the next person -- but that doesn't mean it felt like a complete, finished product worthy of great praise. Instead I'm left looking at the wasted potential and wishing the movie had carved out its own path more, one distinctive to itself, rather than just be a mashup of previous Disney concepts and tropes. I won't act like there's nothing to like here, nor that it's completely lacking in heart: I actually would love to see fandom for this movie re-imagine it in ways that could've improved the story and characters, because there were SO many good ideas here...but for me personally, this movie left me colder than it should've and -- like Asha after meeting Magnifico -- a bit disappointed.

So I make this wish...to have Disney make a film better than this.

Overall Grade: C-

[skygemspeaks]

episode 3 thoughts let's go:

i love that we get to see more of kaya! the dynamic between her and usopp is very very sweet, and it makes their friendship that much more believable. her conversation with nami is also a really good one! when kaya asks nami if she's ever lost anyone close to her and then nami says no...and kaya says she's jealous....😭i think it's really so interesting how your experience watching this series can be entirely different based on whether or not you follow the manga/anime.

similarly, the conversation between luffy, zoro, and usopp was lots of fun! i've said it before and i'll say it again, but iñaki's performance as luffy is absolutely flawless. i really like how he played the scene where luffy realizes that he knows usopp's dad. also...usopp's heartbroken expression when he realizes that luffy knows and got to hang out with his dad....ouch

sham's a woman. huh. that's an interesting little change. i don't particularly feel either way about it. i'm wondering why they made her hair blue instead of green though

we knew already that kaya was going to be a shipyard heiress in this series, but i still think it was an absolutely phenomenal writing choice. we finally have a reason for where she gets her money from, as well as a good reason for why she has a ship like the merry anyways. luffy's little speech about how a ship is also a member of the crew and how it's a home...you could really tell it touched her. she's exactly the kind of romantic person who'd fall for that kind of passion

i feel like usopp is just a lot more likable in the live action than in the manga? maybe it's because his character is a little more grounded, maybe it's jacob's absolutely amazing performance, but either way, i am totally here for it. you could really hear the desperation at the end of the episode when he was running through town screaming that the pirates are here, but no one was believing him. you know it's his own damn fault, but when he's sobbing and asking why no one will believe him, you can't help but feel bad for him.

then!!! when the marines suddenly show up surrounding him, and he looks up to see koby standing over him. and koby says "i believe you." chills, man. i think this is one of the few times where i actually felt relief when the marines showed up? which is a weird thought. i wonder what part they're going to play next episode and how the straw hats are going to get away.

[absolutebl]

Takara-kun and Amagi-kun

series review 

Japanese BL: Takara & Amagi

2022 Gaga & Viki

Tropes: high school crush, chaos muffin, high angst, classic seme/uke, secret relationship

Don’t expect modern BL but do expect classic live action yaoi, it’s absolutely lovely. Japan played with narrative beats with this BL so it actually launches with a confession scene and moves instantly into a secret relationship. The initial meat cutes are told from each boy’s perspective as flashbacks. That can feel a bit jarring at first but if you roll with it you’ll find that it’s really flipping good, with both of them liking each other, and already in a relationship, yet so nervous about what to do it’s actually quite tense. It’s completely and totally high school first love, flip-flopping agony and joy. It made me so happy but it’s also so teenage crisis management it’s traumatic to live through. But this is my favorite kind of Japanese BL, I kept getting a hint of Seven Days and I don’t mention that show lightly. 

Amagi, our uke, is an ADORABLE sunshine bean nugget with wildly uncontrollable elbows, one of the weird outsider kids. He’s frantically jerky and clumsy but in a way that doesn’t seem as overblown as Aoki did in Kieta Hatsukoi.

Takara is elegant to the point of deadpan, too cool, one of the popular clique, reserved and inaccessible at first (to us and Amagi). But turns out Japan is doing their version of pining with him. And when Japan does pining it skips right over yearning and into THIRST. 

Takara, it turns out, is the one who liked Amagi first, and it’s Takara who will latch on to Amagi’s confession as an excuse to hold on as tightly as possible to his sunshine. 

Takara’s reason for keeping their relationship secret is that he doesn’t wanna share Amagi, ‘cause he thinks his friends will like Amagi too much and steal Amagi’s attention - such a seme reason. I find Takara such a likable and relatable character. 

Takara will (as we learn, as we watch him learn, and as eventually we see Amagi learn) do absolutely anything to keep Amagi. He’ll risk his friendships, his popularity, his status, even go against his own nature and learn to communicate (which includes going against his personality as a sullen teen).

“I like him so much that it feels stupid.” 

The show depicts depth of personality and relationship balance by switching perspectives and voice overs from Amagi to Takara relatively quickly. We need this, especially at the beginning, since Amagi shows too much emotion and Takara too little. 

Takara is a classic seme, voicing many of the conceits of the archetype while at the same time being a seme who is scared of his own semeness and therefore forced to learn to communicate. 

Amagi’s fears are all the fears of first love (and not really queer love, just first time jitters). Takara’s attempts to mitigate that fear mean trying to understand Amagi better through conversation. 

I adore this because part of first love should be learning how to talk to each other! The way Takara evolves in this matter is so good and so important to the BL genre I did a whole post about it.

I genuinely think this is a BL suitable to show to youngsters and teens, a genuine YA coming of age narrative. It might even be good for them to see. 

It is Takara’s voiceover that really blew this show away for me. 

All too often in BL we only get the uke’s perspective and that means, with a unlikable uke, it can be hard to understand why the seme loves him in the first place (see SCOY). With these two we are never left in any doubt that Takara thinks Amagi is beyond adorable, wants to have him (in all ways) and keep him (probably in all ways too). 

Takara is also a corny, awkward dork, because coolness and passion are incompatible, and I love him for this. He keeps stepping on land mines with Amagi and not knowing what to do about it. Good thing his default it to actually ask what’s going on. 

GOOD SEME, have a cutie as a treat. 

And Takara does win, there were more kisses in this high school JBL than I have seen since Seven Days. Sure they are awkward, teenager, dead fish kisses, but for this narrative that totally worked for me.

“He said something cute and I couldn’t help myself“ is so traditional Japanese seme in one sentence I can’t even.

As a couple, and we see them in a relationship for the entire show, these two are sweetly shy, and so painfully awkward it’s almost unbearable. The hand holding! The torture of decision making when you can’t read his mind! 

The. 

Agony. 

Of. 

It. 

All. 

But I happen to enjoy the way burgeoning desire works with high school characters better than in any of the other settings Japan explores. What I’d find annoying in an office drama (like Senpai) is fine in this BL. 

Warning though, these two pretty much define cringe. Takara because he is trying desperately to maintain his cool (and perform perfect seme) while simultaneously being so in love/lust with Amagi in high school where desire is, by definition and practice, uncool. While Amagi is just a tiny basket case with more than a hint of blushing maiden about him. He is all frenetic movements and angles, like he cannot control his limbs or his emotions, both are deeply confusing to him. 

Watching them stumble around each other and reflectively agonize over every little movement and conversation is an exercise in joy, patience, and terror. It’s all so “teenager” I can hardly stand it.

I gnawed on my knuckles and squealed a lot with this show. Stoic cool kid who must lean to communicate to keep the tiny disaster nugget he’s madly in love with. It is beyond charming: soft and gentle, packed with cuteness and high school angst. Did anything actually happen? No. Was it emotionally tense and paced well enough for me not to notice? Absolutely. Was there plot? Not really. Did I enjoy the hell out of it, anyway? Oh yes. 

9/10 

TOTALLY RECOMMENDED

GaGa’s subs are more poetic but Viki’s are more comprehensible, so I did (and recommend) both. But if you must pick? Viki.

I you liked this show you should watch Seven Days and even Old Fashion Cupcake. Also something like Cherry Magic, My Love Mix Up, and Mr Unlucky might also be enjoyable. For something a little less cringe but with a similar dynamic there’s Korean BLs Cherry Blossoms After Winter and Light on Me. (Speaking og, T&A features one of the best wingman since Namgong.) 

More? 

Takara, Amagi, Communication Used to Subvert Seme/Uke plus some stuff about Ask v Guess cultures 

(source) 

[indieyuugure]

i have to say that i live for your 12 april and casey in your comic. either together or separately i just love you characterization of them. you’ve literally made me love 12 april just from her introduction into the rise universe. and casey and raph just being rascals all on their own just. AHH!! i also love that you’ve given the 12 boys some room to just be kids and goof off, since i’ve seen so many other crossover content where they’re hardened battle soldiers, your comic feels like something that could exist in line with the actual show. i’m sorry this is so random and badly put together but i’ve been re-reading your comic for the 5th time and just had to let you know just how much i love it, your art, and the franchise overall. you were literally one of my first tmnt blogs i followed and i hope you keep making things you love

Omg! I’m so happy you love my comic! 🥹

I actually intentionally did a lot to 12 April’s personality to make her more likable. I’ve always felt that her character was only half written, like they had so much they could’ve done, but it felt like they just forgot? Idk, but I see so much 12 April hate I wanted to prove that she’s not strictly a bad character, just an incomplete character.

I always keep things as close to the canon as possible as it makes it so it feels like a continuation rather than a fanfic. Not that it’s bad to do this, but I, person always find it a little weird when people alter the turtle’s personalities slightly, it’s almost like the uncanny valley effect that makes it feel weird and distant, so I’m glad it’s on point! I feel like the 12 turtles are exceptionally susceptible to this since the characterization style in that show is less direct. Most of it is done through indirect characterization which makes it harder to spot and if you don’t pick up on that then it can easily feel like they have no personality. (Leo, in almost all versions, is very prone to this kind of thing because of his leadership position that makes him not able to express his personality as boldly as his brothers)

I hope you continue to enjoy Rise of the Parallel, thank you for your question! ^v^

[soundbluster]

So I read the first issue of the new transformers series.

Admittedly I'm a huge fan of the original idw run despite its flaws, so the whole thing has a bit of a bittersweet feel for me.

The good...

Without spoilers, I liked some of the story choices, I'm glad they did something a little bit different with the familiar old "ark crashes on Earth" plot point. And the way they initially used Jetfire was good, though I have thoughts about what happens to him...

The human characters were fairly likable, and don't detract too much from the robots.

The story was much less nostalgia-bait-y than I was expecting / what the marketing made it seem like, and they seems to be setting up some new ideas /intriguing history so I'm curious to see how that folds out.

I definitely like it's a smaller cast, hopefully it'll allow for some good character development/character moments.

The bad...

I'm not sure how I feel about the art style. It very much feels like it's aping the original marvel comics which I can't say I'm keen on. Some of the proportions and facial expressions looked really weird/off in places. And it was a bit unclear what was supposed to be happening in some of the fight scenes.

I really didn't like the "edgelord" moments, I know mtmte could be pretty graphic at times, but the violence in this just felt like pointless shock value and was kinda just gross... Two moments in particular felt REALLY out of place in a transformers story. It did kinda feel like 90s "this is not your father's Autobots" edge in places...

Overall feelings...

Overall feelings are pretty neutral to okay.

It probably appeals more to older fans/people who have nostalgia for the marvel /Dreamwave comics, or those who like darker story's, but I can't say those kind of comics are for me. "Edgy"/dark story's is just not what I look for in Transformers/comics in general. (I'm in the minority that didn't like IDW's last stand of the wreckers or last bot standing for the same reason!)

I'll keep reading it for now as there's definitely moments I liked and I'm curious to see how things develop, but I don't know if I'll be reading the series long term.

[secretdonderwolk]

you shipping carlos/charles in a toxic way is so on brand and soooo right tbh… i don’t mind the cute take most people have on them (in their defense they are pretty cute together) but there’s something about them that can be SO toxic and i love it. give us some of your perspectives on them??

no i think the european royalty looking lovebird narrative is a slay it's just i think they're much more fun as kind of enemy coworkers who should have a love at first sight thing going and everyone expecting that to happen to only for them to just not get along that well.... i don't have many perspectives yet also i think because they're ship is clearly v tainted by people who have an agenda (which i think is fair and fun it's just that makes it harder to really figure out the correct vibes butttt what i love is that they are both very good at playing the game of being a f1 driver like they fit the picture so well the looks the ferrari of it all the sponsorships the girlfriends the history like from the outside looking in it's hard to imagine them as anything other than a f1 driver and they know that it takes so much more than just being talented. like they're both so savvy with how they're regarded by the public (maybe charles a little more so)/so imageeee obsessed like they both have such rigid ways about how they want to be perceived and seem to be very control freak-y about that and really know how to play it..... so with their social media bit like just the delicious fraughtness of being able to play best friends soooo well both of them because it gets the tiktok views like at what point does your true self end and your work self takes over when it's all intertwined like that?? do you sometimes forget that in reality you don't really get along super well?? does it piss you off that someone is playing the best friend narrative as well as yourself IF not better?? if being the nice guy the good person the good teammate is your badge of honor and your teammate is doing it just as well if not better like?? also i think they're very similar like i think they are maybe the most similar of all the dudes on the grid and i think that pisses them off sometimes lmao and i think that's so fun.... like what if i was kind of annoyed with you a lot of the times and then i realized that means i myself am annoying because we're so similar??? i also think it must killllll charles that carlos has managed to have a legit friendship with a former teammate (lando) and charles only kinda made it weird with seb and isn't besties with carlos now either like i think for him it's very important that he feels he's a ''''good person'''' (which is why he's so spineless some of the time if you don't stand for something etc etc) like at some point he must've looked in the mirror like is it MEEE why isn't it WORKING...... obv he has pierre but that's a diff thing that's a childhood thing..... ALL THAT TO SAY i think both these dudes emit incredible PTA mom vibes like they're so likable so easy to get along with hahaha yes sure we'll organize christmas brunch for the whole class and run that shit like the navy but also i will outdo you........but in a nice way :)))))<333

[imogenlefay]

So, I read this book... Daisy Jones & The Six

so, i've been thinking about doing a thing, and maybe someone finds it interesting, or maybe it's just for me to order my thoughts and i'll get bored to it before march, but we'll see. basically, for the last two years i've been keeping track of the books i read (or audiobooks i listen to) bc i felt like i'm not reading enough (except for fanfiction). and while i'm far behind people who actually read a lot, and woefully behind how much i used to read when i was a teen, i'm actually pretty happy with the progress. made it to 34 in 2022 and 40 in 2023, and hope to get more done this year. 2024 is starting off strong, just finished my first book of the year, and usually when i do that, i have thoughts. so what's the point of blogs if not to put that out there, so it stops haunting my head? or maybe even get someone else's thoughts on things? so i decided to blog about the books i read (unless i forget or don't feel like it), starting with general feelings and then going into spoilery feelings. so, yeah, this is what this is going to be. let's go.

Summary: a look back on fictional rockband The Six rising to fame, where they meet It Girl Daisy Jones, leading to the collab of a century, until the band breaks apart after one show in Chicago. Told completely in interview snippets.

General Feelings: say what you want, it's a fast read, and it's fun. the style of writing with everything being interview snippets, aka the band members' and friends' memories, works really well, especially the parts where one person remembers things, and the next person directly contradicting their memory. it's a quick way to give you everyone's point of view, and sowing the seeds of miscommunication and conflict. the story is easy to follow, and it's also easy to feel for most of the protagonists. the characters are likable enough, and their conflicts are mostly realistic. the final show in chicago and the general fall out unfortunately fall kind of flat for me. like... this is it? it's not much of a bang, tbh... which maybe sums up my feelings about the whole thing. it's a fun ride, but at the end, it's like "huh, guess that was it?" it is fun, but it's just not very deep, i guess. although the way they describe the songwriting process and the songs that result from it really was cool to read. another fun fact, i totally forgot there's a show until i googled the book cover. and since i was reading and caught myself wanting to check out the songs, only to remember they're not real... well, that might be enough motivation to check out the show. Recommendation: yes, i'm doing that before the actual feelings part cause i can't discuss those without spoilers. so, if anybody cares, rec first. Daisy Jones & the Six is a casual read. like, vacation book. for the beach, for train rides, for flights. it's fun to breeze through, but i doubt it'll really grip most people. so yeah, not a must read, but can be fun, light reading.

Spoilery feelings:

(consider yourself warned)

there are a few things that really didn't work for me.

i never really got into the whole daisy/billy thing. like, his instant antipathy, the weird rivalry, and then her oh so deep love for him, and at the end, him finally kinda sorta loving her but loving his wife more... maybe that's part of the format. both of them looking back at it from the future, where it's just not that present anymore. but it didn't ring that true.

my biggest problem was probably drug use and how it was handled. it just felt so trivial and meaningless. like sure, for both billy and daisy it's supposedly the central struggle, but it just fell so flat for me. i know part of that is that early december i read Wir Kinder vom Bahnhof Zoo, which (in germany) is a famous non-fiction account describing the fall into heavy drug use of an extremely young girl (starting at 12, i think), and it's the bleakest thing i've ever read, with the girl herself describing how she fell into heavier and heavier drugs, paid for by prostitution. so it's dark, and it's heavy, and compared to that the drug use in Daisy Jones feels almost offensive in how little weight it has. the comparison is super unfair, i know, i'm primed and biased, sure. but after that, the book may say a million times "oh yeah, that was a bad time for daisy", but it just doesn't ring true.

i'm not sure if the identity of the interviewer is supposed to come off as a twist? like, sure, i didn't see it coming, but it didn't really have an impact, either.

lacking impact is probably my final point. while the book, especially with the format of the interviews, is really good at painting the conflicts within the group, i didn't feel like these paid off in a significant manner. like, eddie's whole growing resentment never went anywhere except being a red herring. the show in chicaco wasn't that special in the end, was it? nothing happened at the show himself. just, the band broke at many different places at once, but they barely impacted each other. billy's struggle with addiction toppling over, daisy having a breakdown and camila helping her through it, pete getting married, the karen/graham thing exploding... like, you could see them coming, but the resolution all at once felt kinda random. like, it didn't feel like there's this big bang setting off all the dominos (yeah, mixing metaphors, i know), but more like "oh yeah, that's all happening now, i guess". sure, there isn't always a big bang, but i feel like they teased one, and then there was nothing. so i guess the end feels a bit anticlimactic, like it just fizzled out.

it was still fun to read, but more like meaningless fun, i guess. definitely preferred "The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo", which was super fun. interesting writing style, but story is a bit shallow. okay, now i talked enough about a book i kinda sorta liked but wasn't super impressed by. anyone else thoughts about it? did you read it? did you watch the show? do you or did you have feelings about it? seriously would love to hear them!

[thegeminisage]

IT'S TIME FOR. a star trek update. and BOY am i behind. wednesday we watched tng's "frame of mind," friday we watched ds9's "progress" and tng's "suspicions," and last night we watched ds9's "if wishes were horses." i am so thrilled to announce that despite the high amount of episodes including tng episodes i have almost NOTHING to complain about this update. like a little, but not much.

frame of mind (tng):

first of all we must acknowledge this gifset, which according to the timestamp i saw with my eyeballs near the end of january which (and i checked) was right after the episode where picard is like yeah worf should kill himself. IN the course of the episode worf asks riker to assist with his suicide which is both the most horrible and romantic thing that's ever happened with them. so i went into the ship tag. found it most bereft except for this gifset. i have been DYING to know for a MONTH AND A HALF what's going on in this ep. i finally cracked recently and read the summary which only made me more excited.

so. drumroll. DID THE EP DELIVER..............???

yes.

yes, with VERY minor caveats.

i think my only real complaint about this episode is that it was a me problem. like i was picturing some scene where worf tenderly (for him) talks riker down from a fit of madness and also he was the real worf. i built it up too much in my head. that's not what happened. in my mind palace it is. i'm a little tempted to do a rewrite of it to make it happen but i barely have time to breathe so that will remain a wistful thought for now. like, i knew the enterprise setting wasn't real, but regardless of the amount of worf/riker (e deanna) ship content it was just kind of disappointing to learn that the mental facility was ALSO not real because the worf and data that rescued riker were not real and the beverly that snuck in to see him was also not real and his experiences there also weren't "real" in the physical sense, even though he very much did still experience them. very "it was all a dream!" of them

OTHER THAN THAT. i was really into it. i loved everything about it. i loved riker's break from reality. i loved that crazy lady with the spoon. i loved how even data got weirded out at riker's antics. i love that the part of riker that is his feelings is represented by deanna and the part of him that is action is represented by worf WORF E RIKER E DEANNA REAL! i didn't like picard being his logic. spock should be everybody's logic. get that guy outta here

also, what a great touch to have very chill very normal very laid back riker be like yeah if i don't tear this set apart with my bare hands before i sleep i really WILL go crazy 🙃

side var didn't beverly say people were coming to clean it up in the morning...what happened to the ship cleaning itself smh. justice for the invisible janitors and housekeepers of starfleet

also, why did this episode make me slightly into riker and beverly as friends with benefits...the whole trill boyfriend situation adds so much fun complication to that as well depending on a multitude of varying and equally valid interpretations of that event. like, girl, forget picard's two-timing ass. what's he ever done for you except knock you up with an affair baby. join the worf e riker e deanna polycule. they could make better husbands. shit, i could make a better husband. forget him girl! you don't need him

progress (ds9):

holy fucking shit.

this episode BLEW me away. easily a must-see on my spreadsheet, when i (eventually?) catch up. every single thing they do with kira is AMAZING.

the old guy was so instantly likable. he was likable even when he was being sexist BECAUSE he was being sexist specifically to wind kira up because kira was playing bad guy. their chemistry was so good. i was just as worried about him as kira was the whole episode long

what a brilliant way to discuss war, not by showing the violence or the gore or the death but by simply showing us this guy who won't leave his farm and sleeptalks during his nightmares and these other two who can't speak but WILL kill you with pitchforks. like, you have "chain of command" with picard and the four lights and then you have this, and both of them are so important in our understanding of the cardassians and what they do.

sisko was so absolutely kind to kira. like, he outlined her struggle perfectly - she's no longer the underdog, and in some ways that sucks, because she now has no idea how to behave. her morals and her logic and her heart are all telling her different things.

AND LIKE. SISKO. KNEELING DOWN. TO BE EYE TO EYE WITH HER. i cannot possibly express how important that is. HE IS SO GOOD!!!

i'm actually really glad she got teary eyed but DIDN'T cry. we just watched her ugly cry in that episode with kai opaka and i think to do it twice together so soon would have been too much. but it DID need that emotional beat, and they struck the perfect balance.

the through-line of the fucking kiln. every time i saw them building it. wah.

the ending was so shocking and so horrible...actually, my one tiny nitpick with this ep is that there wasn't really the proper setup for it. the air will be poison if those guys tap the moon, but surely the ostensible utopian starfleet is not gonna tap it with even one holdout...? though i guess bajor isn't in starfleet proper? tng often has too MUCH technobabble and exposition but this didn't have quiiite enough - i feel like forcefields or masks or other scifi tech might have solved this problem and i didn't REALLY believe the only two solutions were to let this guy die on the moon or forcibly relocate him, especially when kira brought up a slower way to get the energy they needed - but maybe that's the point, that she ended the fight before it could become one, idk. i also wish he had said "as long as this house is still standing" a little earlier - having him say it right before the end sort of gave away what kira was gonna do before she did it, though i DIDN'T expect her to start with the kiln.

other than though it was so good. it says so much about the nature of the cardassians as a group, and bajorans as a group, and about kira herself.

also, sorry, jacket coming off hot.

suspicions (tng):

THERE WERE SO MANY WOMEN IN THIS EPISODE??? let's count

beverly, and it's a beverly-centric episode

hot klingon lady who threw beverly around like a sack of flour (again: beverly is bicurious)

VERY snooty vulcan lady with the human??? husband????? sorry but doesn't he have a refractory period how do they get BY during pon farr? ok. none of my business. moving on

nurse ogawa who helped commit women's wrongs

guinan, beverly's confidant and pretend tennis elbow haver...

deanna also had a few lines which i'm choosing to count in the spirit of things

also, that green alien guy? long feng from atla.

anyway, i was tickled with this episode. not only because they finally wrote a ferengi who isn't racist, showed another vulcan/human couple, included a bunch of women, AND gave beverly the main role, but also because the mystery was perfectly done. it gave us just enough information to stay interesting, and i figured out long feng faked his own death RIGHT before the reveal - not early enough to bore me but early enough to make me feel smart

i didn't really understand why beverly chose to end ferengi racism in a field that she wasn't even in but i support her so much. also, she got to do an illegal autopsy and steal a fucking shuttle. GOOD for her

again i want to state that this klingon lady TOSSED HER AROUND it was so fucking sexy. get it beverly. i so rarely have so much fun with a tng episode and we got two good ones in a row!!

if wishes were horses (ds9):

this is a sequel to an episode of tos i mostly don't like, "shore leave." tng also had a "shore leave episode" (the one where picard's mom showed up and i think some ensign got spliced into the floor) so we have done "our thoughts manifest as reality" twice now and i assume will continue to do it in every star trek series going forward. so far i have not liked any of these episodes because of the redundant and irrelevant nature of them (oh look! a random tiger!) but ds9's is probably my favorite out of the three

i just feel like you have the potential to get so real and do such character work when thoughts are manifested as reality and instead it's always this crazy shit. i think tng tried to do it with more gravitas, but it's tng and early tng at that, so i've yet to see star trek do one of these successfully and i doubt i ever will.

ANYWAY. number one complaint with this is of course the fake dax. i think it's really funny that she keeps gently but firmly shooting julian down, and while julian is a likable cringefail loser i NEVER saw him as a creep, not even with repeated attempts to ask her out...and then this happened, and it was very touch and go for a second there. i'm glad his instinct was to fight dax when she was compromised, really horrified when he "gave in," and then was extremely relieved when they were interrupted. he tried i guess. i'm gonna try not to hold it against him. if i can forgive geordi i can forgive julian.

we ALMOST got it working right. dax was like you know julian in a way i kind of feel like we invaded YOUR privacy it's not as though you can help having fantasies and they should have been safe in your head which was like. ok great take actually! we are being adults! but then the fake one showed back up and tried to pick a catfight with the real one and SSSSIGH

keiko and o'briens little daughter is SO cute. i mean she is SO fucking adorable. rumpelstiltskin was easily the dumbest part of this episode but that little baby is so adorable it was almost worth it to see her. i also didn't like that obrien didn't immediately say no as a kneejerk reaction to selling his daughter. girl what's wrong with you

i DON'T like that there's no baseball in the future. number one i refuse to believe americans could ever fall out of love with baseball even if it's only in a "let's bring back this vintage game" kind of way and number two it's one of the only sports i kind of like and understand. sisko being a nerd about an ancient dead sport is so funny though. good for him.

THAT SAID. i was kind of hoping sisko would see his dead wife. we got a great little moment where kira imagined an explosion and a guy on fire, which touched on something she probably actually has seen, and it was a fun way to give a stupid and silly concept some gravitas, but when everything got quiet there at the end i was expecting sisko's wife and no, it was just mr baseball again

shoutout also to odo running around with two real live birds on that set, quark fucking the birds after they turned into ladies, and then odo imagining quark in jail. truly a series of events, though given quark offering to make him a changeling lady friend in the holosuite (refreshing that at least in ds9 they acknowledge it as a sex toy), i kind of expected a serious moment with him too where he got his wish unwillingly.

and finally, i had SUCH a hard time following the plot of this episode.

the ending of this...eh. the power of positive thinking got rid of the rift = funny? the power of positive thinking is why a bunch of aliens showed up to wreak havoc = ehhhhh. the closest we came to having that serious moment i wanted was kira's .5 second scene and it JUST wasn't long enough. probably my least favorite ds9 episode yet, if we don't count the one with q, but still not as excruciating as some of tng's duds - it was entertaining enough not to make me hate existing for a single watch.

TONIGHT: tng's "rightful heir" (worf episode???👀) and ds9's "the forsaken" (deeply not looking forward to this...the summary says LWAXANA TROI is supposed to be mencing my best boy odo. please save him please get the tng out of my ds9 please please pleeease)

[spammreviews]

The Junji Ito Story Ranking, Worst to Best

Trigger warning:

Suicide, self harm, mentions of body horror, death, animal death, rape, marital abuse, transphobia, and sexism.

This will not include Junji Ito’s adaptations of others' works. There are also some works which couldn’t be put in this story because they simply aren’t available in English.

Also, there are two kinds of Junji Ito stories: one shots and longer stories.

One shots are stories such as Slug Girl and the Enigma of Amigara Fault.

Longer stories include Gyo and Remina.

There are some stories which are kind of on the fence between the two such as Tomie, Souchi, Uzumaki, and the Dissolving Classroom. These are collections of multiple different stories which can work together as one cohesive story. I ranked all of the Tomie chapters as separate stories as I felt like their quality varied, but Uzumaki, Souchi and Dissolving Classroom had more consistent quality (for better or for worse), so they were ranked as one whole work.

Penultimately, some of these stories have multiple titles. I have tried to show both titles when that happens, but there are most likely some times when I have made a mistake.

Lastly, some of my reviews will contain spoilers while others will not. Those with spoilers will contain a (Spoilers) tag.

Worst to best

F:

133. The Bizarre Hikizuri Siblings:

The Seance-

I hate every character in this story.

This story is about a family and they’re all spooky weirdos, like the Addams family if they were all annoying.

There’s the fat guy.

His design is obnoxious, and his entire existence is a never ending stream of stupid, overdone fat jokes. Wait, actually, that’s not fair, there is also a bunch of gross out humor.

There’s the little girl. She’s the “evil little girl” trope. She’s obnoxious and I hate her design.

There’s the little boy. He’s the “evil little boy” trope. He’s obnoxious and I hate his design.

There’s the eldest girl. She’s…she’s there.

There’s the eldest boy. He’s pretending to be mature and he speaks in a weird false-eloquent manner. He is not extremely obnoxious.

There’s Narumi. She’s “normal”, which means she’s boring.

The first half of the story sees us being introduced to our main characters. The eldest boy invites a girl to dinner. At the dinner, ee see the fat guy drooling and eating lots of food in a gross way. 

The family has a fight and I don’t know what emotion I should be feeling in that scene. Is it funny? If so, it fails, because there aren't any actual jokes. Is it supposed to be dramatic? If so, it fails because I don’t care about any of these characters. It’s clear that the family is grieving, but they’re all grieving in these extremely inhuman ways- so I can’t relate to them.

The family decides to have a seance for their dead parents, and that takes up the rest of the story. It’s filled with gross-out humor, inane banter, and extremely repetitive character beats. I think the little girl cries like ten or so times.

The family is also just arguing all of the time. Every page is another argument. I know that families argue with each other, but this is ridiculous. I don’t think this family likes each other.

All of this arguing means that the plot has the pacing of molasses, as none of this arguing moves the plot forward.

Also, family drama isn’t interesting when the family are just annoying caricatures of tired archetypes. 

This story sucks in every way. It’s not even nice to look at because the designs of the family make me want to vomit.

God, I hate this story so much.

132. All of the Souichi Stories-

The Souichi stories are too silly to be scary, too dark to be funny, too down-to-earth to be campy, and too annoying to be likable. 

Souichi is a child who never poses a threat to our main characters, so he’s never scary. 

However, his hijinks are also not fun to watch because they usually involve hurting people.

Fictional characters getting seriously hurt can be funny in a fucked up way, but only if something is added to make it funny. These stories just have someone getting their hand hit with a hammer. People getting hurt can also be fun if they are being injured in an extraordinarily cartoony manner, like in Evil Dead 2, but the injuries characters receive here are stuff like stepping on a nail, which is a very simple and realistic way to injure oneself, meaning that it’s not fun.

Despite being about a child who’s evil, these stories never have much fun with that premise or do anything creative. The only way Souichi being a child barely affects his career as an asshole is that he doesn’t face consequences.

Also, the others characters in this story are blacks of wood with no personalities and no dimensions. As such, the story is extraordinarily boring whenever Souichi isn’t on screen.

Watching a child be annoying to a bunch of boring people gets extremely old extremely quickly, especially with how repetitive these stories are. There are about fourteen of them, and they all have the same plot.

Lastly, Souichi is just annoying. He has all of the most annoying character traits of children: he always repeats things, he screams way too much, he eats really messily, he’s a gleeful asshole, and he never faces any consequences for his actions. 

This kind of character can work, like that prince kid from the Tintin comics, Abdullah or whatever. However, that kid appears in like fifteen pages over the course of two different books. 

However, Souchi is the main focus of these many stories.

Even when Souchi gets what is coming to him, it’s never cathartic because it’s always way too much, like him getting nails through his cheeks. That’s disturbing. 

Essentially, the problem with these stories is that they have no sense of tone. The mix of morbidity and wackiness leads to the stories just being really annoying.

They’re also really repetitive, both in the sense that almost all of these stories follow the same formula with the same beats, but this formula is one where the plot is one continuous cycle of Souchi being a little shit, getting away with it, and then getting angry for some reason. 

131. Fashion Model-

(Spoilers)

Haha it’s funny because the woman is ugly and aaah! it’s also scary because the woman is ugly and haha it’s funny because the ugly woman is going to rape the man as punishment for being slightly paranoid. 

This story is stupid. It’s cruel to every character involved, it’s not funny, the tone is all over the place, the pacing is extremely slow, and its attempts at suspense are laughably pathetic because they’re based on us being scared by a woman for no other reason than her being ugly.

It also has two really annoying tropes being taken to their extreme:

A woman pursuing a man who is clearly not interested in her and

Ugly people are evil/gross/funny.

When this story isn’t being absolutely awful, it’s just boring because every character ranges from bland to just kind of unlikable, like our main character. 

Despite him being kind of a jerk, seeing bad things happen to him isn’t gratifying because they are far worse than what he deserves. 

130. The Bizarre Hikizuri Siblings: 

Narumi’s Boyfriend-

(Spoilers)

This first two pages of this story see a teenage girl, Narumi Hikizuri, about to commit suicide, only to be saved by her boyfriend. You would assume that the rest of the story explores depression. You would not be wrong.

We then meet the other Hikizuri siblings, who, as I mentioned previously, suck, and there are five of them!

Then, we cut back to the teenage girl, Narumi obviously, and her boyfriend. Narumi is depressed and threatening to commit suicide again. Her boyfriend is kind of being an asshole about it, complaining about how hard it is to care for her. 

It’s pretty fucked up that there is really no good support network for Narumi.

Then, Narumi’s family finds her and kidnaps her, and it’s at this point where I can’t help but wonder if Narumi’s siblings are supposed to be scary or funny in this story. It wouldn’t make any sense for them to be scary, as their designs are weird and they talk weirdly, and they’re stupid and silly and wacky and dumb. However, them being funny makes no sense considering the fact that this is a story wich starts with a suicide attempt. Also, it’s hard to laugh because the siblings are so fucking stupid looking. They make me nauseous. Not only that, but the family members are being abusive to Narumi, and that’s not funny, even if their abuse is silly.

Anywhoo, the story randomly swerves in tone when Narumi says she’s going to kill herself, douses herself with gasoline, and flicks a cigarette lighter. You assume she’s on fire and is dying. You would be…uhh…wrong?

After that happens, the family gets Narumi’s boyfriend, takes him to their house, and tortures him by forcing him to lay in a bag with what appears to be the burnt body of Narumi.

It’s kind of disturbing, but it’s also very silly. So, what emotion am I supposed to be feeling?

Then, Narumi shows up, and the boyfriend dies of a heart attack.

As it turns out, the thing that burned was a mannequin, and the family were just messing with the boyfriend.

Narumi only seems a bit angry about her boyfriend dying, and the last panel sees her saying she “Had no intention of actually doing it” meaning she had no intention of setting herself on fire.

Now, I’m going to give the story the benefit of the doubt and say that Narumi was actually going to kill herself. I sure hope that when the family told Narumi she was just doing this for attention, they weren’t right. I sure hope that when Narumi threatened to kill herself in front of her boyfriend, she wasn’t manipulating him.

If that was true, this story would be awful.

I’m going to assume that Narumi is just lying. The story still sucks because we have a depressed character trapped with her abusive family and the story doesn’t seem to care. However, it sucks a little bit less because it’s not insinuating that depressed people are “looking for attention”.

In conclusion, this story is one of the most tonally bizarre things I’ve ever seen. It goes back and forth between silly hijinks and serious drama. 

It also doesn’t help that the silly hijinks aren’t funny, and I don’t even know much about Narumi and her boyfriend, so I don’t care about the drama of their story!

129. Groaning Pipes-

(Spoilers)

This is the story about the people getting stuck in pipes.

To truly understand this story, we need to go in deep.

The story starts off with black haired girl being stalked by, gasp!, a guy who is overweight and ugly. Now, I’d argue that the comic seems to want us to find him gross through the way the panels frame him.

So, we’re not off to a great start.

The pudgy kid asks black haired girl out and black haired girl rebukes him, something we are told has happened many times before. So, this guy sucks. 

However, black haired girl then insults this guy by calling him a “swollen and ugly".

Now, obviously, black haired girl has every right to insult someone who is being a creep. However, she is not insulting him on the grounds of being a creep, but instead focusing on his appearance, something he can’t control. In fact, all of the insults the black haired girl levels against the pudgy kid, and there are many, revolve around his appearance. The pudgy kid isn’t bad because he’s pudgy, he’s bad because he’s being a creep.

A result of this is that I kind of dislike both characters in this situation. Maybe that’s the point. If so, then I can congratulate this story on being rather complex in making the point that the girl had the right to not want to have sex with a guy she doesn’t like. Meanwhile, the guy, however much of a piece of shit he is, has the right to not be belittled for his appearance.

Of course, I’m assuming that’s the point. It’s probably not, because the rest of the story is very stupid. Also, the way both characters act is so extreme, it makes them seem like complete caricatures. The pudgy guy is a gross creepy incel and the black haired girl is a vapid valley girl.

Anywhoo, once that scene happens, black haired girl and her sister go to their house, where they bathe for way too long. At first, I was a bit unsure if these siblings were actually siblings because they look to be the same age and act less like siblings and more like casual work friends.

Then, we learn there is something wrong with the pipes in this house. We also see that the mom of this character is a total neat freak. The story feels the need to tell us this fifty or so times in these ten or so pages, and it quickly gets very annoying. There’s also an agonizingly pointless scene  where the mom yells at a plumber. 

It is also in this part where the two girls hatch a plan to let the pudgy guy go to their house so the neat freak mother can scare him off.

To finish our set up, we also meet the Dad of the family, who is divorced from the Mom and hasn’t seen his kids in a while. Unfortunately, the story doesn’t have the time to explore what it’s like to be a child of divorce in any meaningful way. 

So, the story has just been set up. There isn’t even the suggestion of something scary.

The plan of the two sisters goes perfectly, and the mom throws eggs at the pudgy kid.

Anywhoo, then the plot actually kicks off when the mom accidentally kills the Dad because she thinks he’s the fat kid when he sneaks into the house at night. I guess the Dad just really wanted to see his kids again, and IDK, maybe he was drunk or something. None of the members of the family seem concerned about the death of this man.

The mom tells the cops that the husband had a knife, so her killing of him was in self defense. I suppose that makes sense. However, what doesn’t make sense is that the family is just allowed to stay in this house that has become a crime scene. I suppose I’m nitpicking. Whatever.

We then see the Mom obsessing over her husband’s blood being cleaned from the floor, and the harassment causes the maid to quit. Why does the maid even exist in the story? I don’t know.

After these excruciatingly long sequences of nothing, we finally get some suspense when mysterious sounds start coming from the pipes.

This, among many other things, causes the Mom to freaking lose it. This is not the only Junji Ito story where a stressed out mom with a dead husband goes crazy. Another one will be near the top. However, this one doesn’t work because the mom is an annoying caricature of a mom, and her neurosciences are so extreme she becomes unbelievable.

Anywhoo, it turns out that the pudgy kid is in the pipes, which is where the sound is coming from.

The black haired girl suddenly starts acting like an asshole for no reason, and the story ends with the sister getting pulled into the pipes- presumably by the pudgy kid. I should mention that she is wearing a towel, so there is an unsettling subtext to this.

That’s fucked up. What is this story saying? Fat people are rapists?

Also, the mom just disappears from the story.

One kind of wonders why the husband and his death was even included, as he’s absolutely inessential to the actual main plot, which is the incel in the pipes. The mom is also pretty pointless, with her only important action being throwing eggs at the pudgy kid.

This whole story is convoluted, contrived, and nonsensical. Every character in it is a caricature, whether it be of women or of fat people. It also seems uninterested in actually creating an atmosphere of dread and suspense.

Unfortunately, a common theme throughout Ito’s stories (specifically his earlier work) is unattractive people being cast as villains and women going through extremely traumatic events in a way which feels indulgent. This story has these two being taken to the extreme.

128. Nanakuse Kyokumi-

This is the transphobic story.

It follows a woman , Koroketsu, who is obsessed with a writer. She goes to see that writer, Nanakuse, only for Nanakuse to turn out to be evil…and also a trans woman. 

Anywhoo, the main character, Koroketsu, of this story is one of the more colorful main characters because she’s really weird.

This means that the beginning of this story is…interesting with how strange it is.

Then, we meet Nanakuse, the author. She is drawn with a very pronounced chin and nose, and our main character literally thinks “A male!” when she first sees her.

It’s at this point when I stopped wanting to read the story, but I had to because of this fucking list.

After this, the author throws the main character into a dungeon, our main character suffers some body horror, and then the story ends.

If it wasn’t for the transphobia, this story would probably be in C. It is very quickly paced. In fact, it’s too quickly paced, as there’s no time given to creating suspense and atmosphere. We don’t see the author seeming more and more off putting as we get more hints that she is evil. The second the main character shows up, the author acts like an absolute asshole. Then, we get a scene of the two of them drinking which does nothing to build suspense. At the end of that scene, the author randomly reveals themself as evil when they toss the main character in a dungeon. It’s kind of sudden. There’s no buildup with this story.

You know Dracula? That’s a story about a person visiting the house of someone mysterious (Dracula), and we get more and more red flags about Dracula throughout the beginning of the story. It’s fun and suspenseful. If Dracula hypnotized Renfield after one conversation, the story would be very boring.

Moving on, the quick pacing means that the stuff about people having “quirks” doesn’t have time to be fleshed out. It seems interesting, but we barely get to see any of it, or the consequences of it, or why all of these people are obsessed with it.

A bunch of exposition is given, but it's all surface level stuff that doesn’t even help us to genuinely understand what’s going on. We learn how the author bought the house and why she keeps people in the prison, but none of this explores the idea of having quirks. Obviously, horror stories thrive when the horror isn’t explained, but it’s helpful if we at least understand what the horrifying thing even is. Imagine Jaws, but we never learn that it’s a shark.

Not only that, the body horror is a little more silly than scary. It’s also very sudden, much like the rest of this story.

Overall, even without the extreme transphobia, this story is just half-baked, with a half-baked idea that never makes any sense or seems all that scary. 

Also, what was the deal with the old servant lady?

[mdhwrites]

Penacony: Star Rail's Haunted House

And like one trying too hard, you're left only reflecting on how cheap and fake everything is and not in the ways the story wants you to. Oh, and for my normal fans who like it when I rip something apart, this blog is for you.

I'm starting with my non-spoilery thoughts and to start that off, I do want to say that this is better than the Loufu. The game, from character designs, world design and just general work put in has never looked so good. The flavor on everything is top notch and it is a welcome escape from the bland, near industrialist feel of the Loufu. The game design is included in this too with some of the best dungeons we've gotten, not a bad elite in the bunch (as a Fire Trailblazer main, the monkey makes me laugh) and a lot of charm even in the superfluous mechanics you can mostly ignore. The writing also takes a step up as a lot of characters have personality... Kind of.

And this is the crux of the issue. By the end I was left with the feeling that a lot had happened, a lot of words had been said and I'd met a wide cast, but that little of it informed me of anything. Penacony is meant to be a mystery but we are not an investigator. We are just being shouted at constantly "ISN'T THIS MYSTERIOUS AND DRAMATIC!?" to the point where I look up at them and go "Maybe, if you actually let anything be human for more than five seconds." Which I will actually admit: It was human for about half of it. The middle of 2.0, from once you get into the dreams to when the first true twist happens, reminds me of the best of Belobog. Hell, there is a scene in it that is literally the best in Star Rail with how genuine it feels and how real the heartbreak of it is.

But then the lights come on and you see how that scene is nothing but smoke and mirrors too. It is a trick that made me FAR more upset than anything on the Loufu frankly but after the Loufu, it also has eroded a lot of my trust in the writers for their main content. That their narrative lens is extremely narrow and entirely against anything I enjoy in media.

And so I'm left wondering if I'll end up regretting having bought the Battle Pass at the start of the cycle, despite just a week ago having been pretty certain I was with Star Rail wherever it went.

That is enough beating around the bush though. I'll put a good bit of space to let people who don't want spoilers to leave and then I'll get into specifics. 'Kay? 'Kay.

Firefly and Robin are two sides of a coin but both are mistakes. I know it might seem weird to start here rather than talk about the build up, setup, etc. but... Why would I? EVERYTHING is built up to the tragedy of Firefly and the mystery of Robin. If we really must though, here are my impressions of each of the other characters:

Black Swan: Fuck if I know. Genuinely, I don't know. I want to know, especially after having put 150 pulls into her banner but the game is so hell bent on shifting gears with her so constantly and letting her not react to anything that I didn't get a read on her, despite being the character we probably spend the second most amount of time with in this patch. She is at least nice and kind of likable but I don't know how much of that is an act.

Sparkle: Cryptic Bitch. Move on.

Acheron: Okay, I will be fair and say I do like Acheron. I've talked to another person to find out that her red dialogue changes depending on your choices with her. From the white dialogue though, she feels like a Shounen Lancer. The serious one who also has a quirk that lets you laugh from time to time. The tease of her being an Emanator is interesting but also like... How the fuck is Sam even alive for five seconds after she draws her blade then? Unless she just didn't? Emanators are literally the absolute most powerful things in this universe besides the aeons themselves though. She doesn't get to be an Emanator and not be strong game.

Sunday: Cryptic and Evil. Move on because we still know fucking nothing about him.

March 7th and Welt: About as useful as on the Loufu and at least aren't taking up screen time on the Loufu. Welt continues to be a brick, especially with his voice acting and March 7th may as well not be here.

Himeko:

...

Lets out a long, slow breath. We'll talk about Himeko later. Let me just say that she really highlights a problem with a lot of the statements the game makes about us and the express in this patch.

Sam: Not a character and a fucking awful boss fight. AT BEST he is more of a murder hobo than BLADE. The dude motivated by his desire to murder one person. Move on.

Aventurine: The worst. Just the worst. He comes across as an asshole who has zero power, zero charisma and has literally bought every friend, ally and favor that he's gotten in the past ten years. He is not a gambler as his bets are always done deals because he won't make deals he'll lose. He also has way more knowledge than ANYONE else despite having no allies, no one liking him, no powers that we've seen and yet knows the secrets of the memory zone better than the PERSON WHO HAS POWER OVER MEMORIES. Because Black Swan doesn't know Aventurine's truth. She leaves that up to you. It makes for this petulant asshole who is just a mastermind because the game says he is, and NEVER proving it, the last person you'd want to trust but the one you're forced to put your faith into and ally with no matter what. I literally got a joke ending because I told him to piss off.

But let's move on to the two who mattered. Or that we are told mattered, right up until their deaths. Robin is the much easier to point out as bad. We had literally two conversations with her and then find her dead in a bathtub so as to prove that Aventurine is smartest of smarty people because he's just so smart and clever and powerful and OMG! It also is only to further anger and add personality to Sunday. As such, Robin is fridged for TWO dudes. And we have no reason to care because why should we? Because Sunday is now having to cover up her murder? I have to assume she's been dead only recently unless she's been dead for like weeks and you've been somehow preserving her body because Firefly sure didn't get to fucking survive for ANY time.

Speaking of: Firefly is a character made to die. The only options we get to react to her death is compassion for those around us or blinding anger. Not remorse or sorrow or anything like that. It is supposed to mirror the player. You either can just move on or be furious and have it push you to the end of the content. That's it.

And I REALLY mean it when I say she's made to die. She's this nice, sweet girl who snuck onto Penacony specifically to escape an illness she has that is genuinely tragic and is killing her. She is kind, a little mysterious but appears to genuinely have a good heart. We even take a selfie with her which is our keepsake for after she dies.

We also got to already fight the thing that kills her. It appears out of nowhere the first time, descending from the ether above us while it is only us and Firefly, leaving us defenseless. HOWEVER! In a boss fight I do genuinely like, we fend it off for one phase until it finally pushes us to the side and has Firefly in its clutches. It takes its time lifting her up and it looks like Firefly might do something when BAM! Black Swan appears, entirely subduing the beast and freeing Firefly so we can go round two against it and having it be a much easier fight now that three of us here.

But in the memory zone again, knowing that Death is coming and tracking something, with us, Black Swan and now a third super strong fighter, Acheron, we walk into an open area. AND DRUMROLL PLEASE!

It's the instant kill! Where the enemy we have dealt with before comes out of nowhere, shocking and surprising everyone, even physically just bumping into two of us before rushing past the MC while we stand there helplessly and killing Firefly in a single moment! Can we get a round of applause for one of the worst death tropes in video games, if not all of media!? I haven't seen a bullshit death like this since Kat in Halo Reach! Give it up for these writers and how absolutely hack they are!

And here is the worst part: It does hurt. It hurts a LOT.

Penacony's writing is genuinely good in places. The middle portion of Penacony with Firefly is great. Firefly is a delightful character, even if she's a cinnamon roll too precious for this world. The game spends literally half the patch just selling you on why you should care about Firefly. So yeah, seeing Firefly explode into goop hurts but it's like killing a dog. Yeah, that hurts me emotionally but I can tell they're nothing but meat to you and so I get ANGRY at you using my emotions against me.

And worse yet, and I cannot stress this point enough: She is not the important death. We move right back to investigating afterwards with only Acheron's heavy handed words, where she's acting almost like she's never seen death before, to carry the torch for her. No, instead, it's Robin's death that is stated as being able to bring Penacony down. The one that matters. So move on. Firefly is just motivation for you.

Which even if you don't play Caelus and are female with your MC, it still fucking sucks. It also makes the part of Penacony that's good null and void because all you are going to remember is the bullshit death that it was building too. It cheapens all those good moments because you see the manipulation going on.

And... I'm not surprised at this point. If you don't count Herta's Space Station, this is three deaths for three planets. Belobog didn't have a main character death besides the villain and it was PLENTY dramatic enough. The Loufu on the other hand killed Tingyun. Tingyun was our guide... LIKE FIREFLY so that's two in a row that they've axed, but she didn't get much of a character. Instead, it's just shock value for shock's sake, something the writers clearly understood because then the entire epilogue for the PLANET is spent backfilling how wonderful of a person she was and mourning her death. I'm not kidding.

So that is three for three on fridged women, all done in order to just add stakes or a twist to the story. All three of them are also really bad and don't actually add anything to the story. We just continue our investigation after Firefly like we would have done regardless and get to another boss fight that makes literally no sense because YOUR ALLY SENT US HERE ASS HAT!

Addendum: This is actually FOUR deaths in three planets. The fourth is at least a guy so it's not entirely gender biased but it is also off screen. A villain we met once, kind of, named Duke Inferno is claimed to have been killed by Acheron before she came here with his invitation. The only part of this story that's confirmed mind you is the death of Inferno which uh... To quote Aventurine talking about Acheron's story "Lines up a bit too perfectly" for the asshat in the coat. It's not good and it makes the trailer Hoyo put out for the Ever Flame Mansion, that uses imagery you can find on Penacony for it, feel like a lie since we're not likely to see those characters at least until 2.4. But yeah, thought I should mention that there is a fourth dead character.

But... If you are a writer who got a lot of infamy from character deaths and is used to having YEARS of backstory, build up, connections, etc.... This is actually what happens. This is the first the Honkai part of Honkai Star Rail has been a real problem for the game. Even in the lead up to Penacony, they hyped up the potential of death by bringing in the lead writer for the Honkai series, who hadn't been on a livestream since, it sounds like... He killed a BUNCH of Honkai characters a year and a half ago. But that was the SIXTH anniversary of Honkai Third Impact. (sorry if I'm getting the timeline and the like wrong on this at all btw)

Star Rail is not even a year old. With that pointed out: let's talk about Himeko and the Express in general.

I don't know these people. I don't have a connection to these people. This is literally the first real chance we are spending ANY amount of time with Himeko. What does she do with that chance? Be cryptic, untrusting and a complete ass honestly to pretty much EVERYONE despite having pushed us trailblazers as kind, helpful people who will take risks and the like. But nope, she's just as bad as the rest of the people we've just been introduced to.

So when Firefly wants us to take inspiration from our allies on how to lighten the mood or when Acheron at the very start says we've made unbreakable bonds that we might lose... What the fuck are you talking about? March 7th is the ONLY one that might be able to be claimed about. Everyone else has no relationship with us. Half of them may as well not have characters with how little they've done or shown us or felt like they're there mostly to help with exposition.

So sure, go ahead and kill them off. You don't care about them enough to actually make me invested in them, actually build a status quote to then shatter with real danger so... Why should I? These people just exist for you to slaughter because you apparently don't know how to write a dramatic story otherwise.

It... It is rough for me right now. I even played a bit of the side content and went "Yep, this is still a good part of Star Rail." It made me think of how my brother hoped that Star Rail wouldn't have the Persona 5 problem. Great character work, a lot of fun, some real, deep emotions and genuinely good storytelling (I've talked about Guinaifen with such praise for a reason)... You just will never know by playing the main story because it's not there. Not after Belobog. The most important content, the content EVERYONE will see just isn't good.

And whenever 3.0 comes out, I know I won't be hyped after this. Even if they undo the deaths, I don't care. I don't care about your main story because it makes no sense and the stakes are fake. So... Why am I still playing if only the side content is worthwhile?

If I can never trust that a Firefly will do anything but burn out?

======+++++======

I'll admit a lot of this is motivated by anger. I'll probably do a second blog talking about some of the positives about Penacony, because there is a fair bit of good mixed in with the rest, but I needed to get out this frustration first because it was the majority of what the patch left me with. I also still stick by most of what I said, maybe not quite as harshly, even with a calmer mind.

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