#its just. a perfect show. literally so well done

[sirenthatmakesyouwantcake]

these are my thoughts on interview with the vampire episode 5 season 2

I've heard a few things about this episode, I've been really wanting to watch it just havent had had the time yet. I've also heard that they don't actually unpack any of it.which seems pretty on brand for them

(6:10) Sometimes, ii think i have bad handwriting, but then there’s daniel’s, which makes my feel a lot better about my own

(7:52) definitely gay (8:11) definitely

This whole interview is just a who can be the sassiest and most insane old gay guy possible

(9:46) daniel is like that one fall out boy song, he spent an entire decade high and doesn't remember any of it (or that he is gay)

(10:04) i like how they had him standing at the window, it's a nice touch

(12:53) if i just found out that vampires are real, i think i would be pretty fucking afraide too

I've been painting my nails while watching and ended up skipping on of my nails

(13:35) that was perfect, it was so close to quoting the book, it was good enough that i even recognised it before i even looked up the first few pages

(16:03) I like this louis more than the other few, he’s so much more fun and happy instead of seeming like he only sort of wanted to be there.

(17:18) it's no wonder he doesn't remember the first interview, he looks like he could barely stand if he wanted to

(22:55) 70’s armand is millennial grey

(24:21) i think someone is a little jealous (another weirdly spelled word) ((25:19) and the other one is schizophrenia), i also think two someones need to go the marriage therapy

(26:16) well that took quite a turn, and i think its shows their relationship well, how even thought why both had just yelled at each other, armand still saved him right away, and then, though i haven't gotten there yet, i assume that armand made him forget how bad it hurt, (38:22), i take parts of that back, armand basically torched him, they really do need therapy, i'm surprised they didn't end up killing each other in the time between the interviews

(29:23) poor daniel got caught in the middle of their messed up relationship

(30:01) for some reason, i thought the guy in the bag was daniel, and somehow he was revived and turned into a vampire, i clearly didn't think this through much because now that i'm thinking about it again, there in no way that would have worked

Armand is supposed to look 17, he looks 20 or so, i know his actor is somewhere in his 20’s and he did play him well, i don't think they could have done the show the same way if he was played by a younger actor.

(38:22) about time

(45:31) louis is quite a jump scare when the rest of your room is dark and quite

(51:01) once again, not talking about the problems

OTHER

I really like how both daniel’s had similar voices, specifically the gravely (i think that's the right word) parts

Conclusion of this episode: maybe all four of them could use some therapy or atleast to talk to each other and work out their problems (the last part doesn't really apply to lestat, he was not part of the sort of ok guys, not good guys, i don't think any of them really qualify as good guys except daniel, he was just caught up in everything)

This episode really put their relationship through it but i think it may have helped parts of it as well, maybe if armand and louis could actually talk they could have a better relationship that isn't just hanging off a cliff

@certainunkownlove2 was telling me about this post and i think all of you need to read it, he is so wonderful for this

Thank you for reading, now it is time for me to rest (literally speaking, it's late and i'm tired)

S2E1 S2E2 S2E3 S2E4

[drbtinglecannon]

Yes I cried after my 10yr anniversary rewatch of Gravity Falls

Yes I've cried after every previous rewatch

And yes I'll always cry after every rewatch of Gravity Falls

We exist

[airbenderedacted]

What was the beta s2 villain design? I haven’t heard or seen abt that one n im curious

,,,,Bombshell my bbygirl,.

[alsaurus-loves-dean]

.

[olivianyx]

GET YOUR DREAM LIFE: A CHALLENGE

Welcome to this challenge, babygirls and babyboys 🗣️🗣️🗣️

So are you ready to manifest everything you desired in April? Then start up rn!

I'll show you 5 important, simple steps you can use to manifest your dream life!

This challenge will be done for 30 days throughout April. At the end of this month, the results are guaranteed!

You might be wondering if its gonna be hard... Buuuut! The steps are super duper simple, just follow them!

THE STEPS:

🤍 MENTAL DIET 🤍

Y'all heard it right, maintain a strict mental diet, like literally stop wavering! Stop focusing on things you don't want! Don't accept things you don't want! It's that simple. Only focus on positive and favourable thoughts.

Your mornings should go like, 'uhh it's such a beautiful day. It's gonna be amazing day as always. But it's gonna be fun today! I literally love this life, it's freaking amazing, I literally don't know how to thank myself for this. The fact that I'm the ultimate creator is soo mind blowing for me even though I've always been for my entire life. I'm literally thankful for everything! My life's being too perfect and I get what I want everytime, everything's in my favour always. I literally look soo amazing in every outfit I wear, it's such a slay everyday. Uhh I'm soo lucky to have what I want. Literally my self concept is supreme' and blah blah blah. You can add whatever you want further lol.

So like literally throughout the day steady yourself in this mindset. If you catch yourself wavering, be like *sike there ain't no chance bitch* come back on track! Catch yourself waver ---> stop ---> drop ---> flip it into something positive or favourable.

Literally robotic affirming is the only way you can keep your thoughts in check. So go bestie! Keep your head high, keep a check on those thoughts inside your pretty/handsome head 😩 keep slaying everyday ✨

🤍 ROBOTIC AFFIRMING 🤍

Keep affirming babygirls and babyboys! Like literally don't even stop (unless you're doing smth important, then stop affirming for a while lol) y'all got your dream lives already 💅 so why y'all telling yourself that you don't?? Well y'all do have it, so tell yourself the ULTIMATE FACT that you have your dream lives already 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️ tell yourself whenever you're free, like even doing your daily chores such as taking a shit or shower, or brushing your teeth, eating, scrolling through the phone, or walking, waiting in a queue (I'd never wait in a queue... Cus I don't go to places with long ass annoying queues 😭) or listening to music or watching TV, doing the dishes or doing self care (I love my babygirls and babyboys taking care of themselves like there's no tomorrow 😩✋🏻I'mma give y'all a nice smooch 😚) just do it my babies! It's the ultimate way to get (which you already have it) your dream lives! So get tf up babies! 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

🤍 LIVING IN THE END 🤍

This step shouldn't be missed at all babies! So focus on the end! Focus on having it! Focus on thinking from the end! Like you already are living yor dream lives, you have that car you wanted cus you already drive it everyday! You have that sp that loves you till death, that spoils you with their love, money, and what not?! You have that house you've been dreaming of! No, I mean living! You're living in that house already! It's yours my love! You got that perfect sculptured summer body ody that the normal human beings are jealous?? Like you have that body effortlessly 😩✋🏻 FOCUS ON HAVING IT BITCHES 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

🤍 USING SLEEP TO YOUR ADVANTAGE! 🤍

Listen here, my babygirls and babyboys! You sleep 7 to 8 hours a day, and sleep, according to medicals, is a state of complete rest. That means you're not aware of your surroundings. You're just being a black, quiet, space like floaty state (the void actually) so things are easier to manifest Instantly in this state! So why not do psych k or sats or the lullaby method before bed and after you wake up my loves?? It's so much more effective that what you do in the day time! Trust me! Go prepare yourself well for the bed babies 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

🤍 PERSISTENCE 🤍

Since you already affirming that you have your dream lives, you have it already! But you can begin to doubt that why is it not in the 3d... BITCH DON'T EVEN THINK LIKE THAT. Be like 'bitch wtf my life literally feels like a dream come true moment everyday 😭😭 like I'm literally living the life I wanted, I already am experiencing it wtf are you talking about' like literally GASLIGHT YOURSELF INTO THINKING LIKE THAT (cus you already have your dream life) like literally decide that you already have! Hold onto the new story no matter what! 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

So ig I've told you what you needed to do... So all you gotta do is follow the fucking steps babies 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

Okay, take care, love y'all babies! Byeee

- olivia 🤍

[polarisjisung]

MOTORBIKES & MELATONIN

synopsis: sleep doesn't find you in the comfort of your own home or under the covers tucked safely into your bed— sleep finds you in the warmth of park jisung's arms

wc: 1.1k

pairings: jisung × fem!reader, established relationship

genre: fluff

warnings: insomnia + mentions of using sleeping pills/supplement use of the word drug (literally once), speeding (follow the speed limit 🙏)

notes: emosung brainrot is in full swing (though there's not a lot of emosung mentioned) mostly self indulgent so probably not my best work since I was all up in my head but 🤷‍♀️

you're laying on your bed, aimlessly bouncing the soft tennis ball in your hand against the empty space of the wall just above your headboard. sleep never came easy to you and tonight is no different.

you'd tried it all, counting sheep, drinking warm milk, even meditation but nothing ever worked. instead you spent nights tossing and turning restlessly despite being tucked into the warm covers of your bed, chasing sleep.

just as you reach for the purple bottle that lays next to your bed, ready to pour half the jar of supplements into your hand and gulp them down with a glass of water, you hear it.

your perfect form of melatonin and serotonin mixed in one— your drug, your purpose.

the rumble is distinct. it comes with the soft vibration beneath your feet and the deep reverberation in your ears. the roaring of the v twin engine has you shooting up into a seated position as realisation washes over you

there's a dim red glow cast across your room by the break lights as you grab the loose fit leather jacket that rests over the back of your study chair. the woody oriental cologne still lingers through its material as you place it over your shoulders and run out of the front door.

there he is, helmet gripped loosely in his left hand, his right arm open and ready to welcome you into his embrace.

jisung's black hair flows in the wind, his forehead on show— paired with the soft smile he flashes you, you can't help but think he looks perfect.

"didn't even give me a chance to sneak into your room" he sulks taking you in between his arms, giving you a quick spin as he presses a soft kiss to your forehead

"can't blame a girl for wanting to see her boyfriend" you sigh, taking in his warmth with a smile

"yeah?" he pulls back to get a better view of your face, "miss me that much angel?"

"you know it sung"

his laugh is deep yet gentle, eyes sparkling at the sight of you

"well I'm here now"

jisung takes a quick step around you, his touch feather light as he gathers your open hair into a low ponytail, reaching for the hair tie on his wrist to tie it back

"too tight?" he says, voice full of worry and concern— when you shake your head he smiles, placing his helmet over your head

you wonder how people could ever think jisung was anything but the sweet, kind and warm hearted lover you knew, who wouldn't dare let you move an inch to do something he could do for you, like how he gently takes ahold of you in his arms and places you onto the seat of his bike, eventually taking your arms and wrapping them around his waist

"hold on tight" he whispers in that caring tone of his, that's reserved solely for you, ready to whisk you away for the night and you do just that, gripping his waist securely, but not before lifting his visor and pressing a quick kiss to his temple

jisung drives off, wordlessly but with a smile that speaks volumes

there's a warmth that radiates from jisung's body, the only thing keeping you from freezing as the wind rushes past you, blowing with harsh whistles, tyres screeching against the ground as he takes sharp turns through the streets leading towards the countryside

you'd snuck out before, driven way too far over the speed limit, done countless things that would define your reckless youth and yet nothing had your veins coursing with quite so much adrenaline as this, driving way too far, way too fast, with jisung, the person you loved way too much

like always, you find yourself in jisung's lap, god forbid he let you sit on the grass, wet from the fresh morning dew that rests over it, warm hues of orange and light pinks taking over the sky as you hold one another close, the wind still blowing strong gusts your way, your hair blowing in your face until jisung decides to take it between his fingers and hold it back in his palm

"I like this" you whisper, just loud enough that jisung hears it, his lip rising just enough for his teeth to come on show

"I like you" he responds, watching the warm glow of the sun reaching over the horizon through your eyes

"you do?" you smile, wider than you previously had been, it's a smile that reaches your eyes and jisung's unwavering gaze grows brighter at the realisation

"you're my girl, of course I do"

this time it's his turn to press a quick kiss to your forehead, but jisung's greedy, especially so when it comes to you and he can't help but want more, honey brown eyes resting on your lips

"give me a kiss and I think I'll love you forever" you can't help but giggle at the tickling feeling of jisung's hair against your neck as he pouts up at you

"yeah? didn't know my boyfriend needed kisses to do that" you tease with a roll of your eyes

"didn't know your what?" he asks, and you know exactly what jisung's doing, so you whisper the answer with nothing more than a shy smile straight into his ear

"my boyfriend"

"present" jisungs hand is raised and his voice is confident when he looks at you again, it's like he's begging you to tug at his shirt and crash your lips against his, and who were you to say no to him

"you're so cute" you let out between kisses, the bridge of your nose resting against jisung's, who now wears a look of faux offence

"yeah?" he asks, hoping you'll change your mind, though you don't let up, reaching out to ruffle his black hair "only for you"

somewhere between the late hours of the night and the early hours of dawn, between the quietus of your bedroom and the roar of his engine, between gazing up at the stars and watching the sunrise by the harbour— jisung hears your soft snores replace the quiet whispers of awe you once breathed out.

despite it all, jisung's smile remains all the same, radiant, warm and masked by the matte black helmet resting atop his head

[ultrasharpy12345stuff]

SUCCESS STORY (manifesting)

OMFG you guys! I did it! I made it to my desired reality! I'm living my desired life!

All I did was decide it's done. More specifically, I just did Angel's fulfillment challenge (which you don't have to do). Everyday I just decided to live like I was in my desired reality right now as often as I could and whenever I wanted to.

If I vented, I vented. If I ranted I ranted. If I sabotaged my manifestation I just decided it wouldn't matter and that nothing would ruin my manifestation and everything was ok and fine.

And this is totally optional but I affirmed sometimes. I just did to remind myself that it was done.

My affirmations were:

-I'm living my desired life

-Nothing can ruin my manifestation

-I'm in my desired reality

-I'm in my desired reality in my penthouse in Tokyo

-I have all my desires

-The 3D conforms instantly

And it worked! And now I'm happy! I woke up today IN my penthouse in Tokyo! The view of the city is amazing. I checked my bank account and it turns out I'm super rich! Like I literally have BILLIONS of dollars. And it's like I always get millions of dollars out of nowhere! So it's like I get paid just to exist!

Also life in this reality is soooooooo different than on Earth. Like the people in the city are nice... but they aren't just humans beings. I'm seeing Japanese monsters walking around wearing uggs! I can also see Godzilla walking around in a place in the city it's so cool! (don't worry, they made a place in the city specifically for her)

I can also enter the void anytime I fall asleep. Like everytime I go to sleep I wake up IN the void state completely aware. I know this because I just decided I would go to sleep and I did! (one of the things I also manifested, to fall asleep instantly)

And guess what? I also revised my ENTIRE life. Like all the shitty, terrible things that happened to me and all the awful things I've done are GONE! They never happened. All the arguments I had with people on Youtube are gone, they never happened. I never met those people. All the people who I argued with on Discord, well I never argued with them. All the problems with my family are gone.

I also have new memories of me being in Highschool. It went great! I made some friends, they never got angry at me, I got to play my videogames, and I never had to deal with any kind of stress. And I also have my college degree even though I never went to college.

Also let me show you what I look like:

This body:

This is my hairstyle (except it's white colored):

This is my face (trigger warning: AI art, also dw I'm black):

And I'm like popular on Twitter. I'm as popular as @rariatoo. People follow my art and they love drawing my OCs and characters, it's so much fun. Plus I have a patreon and a redbubble. I get to make my OCs as plushies and stickers and ship them off.

And the best part is that there's no wars! No covid, no genocide in the Congo or Palestine, no racism, no problems. And there never will be, everything is fine! Its literally a Utopia.

Summary of what I manifested:

-Desired life & reality

-Freezing Time

-Revising entire life

-Different family (same soul but different looks (slightly) and better personality)

-Entering the void whenever I fall asleep and at will

-A butler friend who I can summon and make disappear at will (he's super nice and never have any problems, perfect personality, kinda shy, and we just had some woopie 🥵🤪)

-Magic (I can do LOTS of crazy stuff)

-Being able to shift realities at will

-Visiting my family through a magic door (my family lives in what I call, "Reality # 3 and I can visit them anytime I want)

-Spawning groceries and food whenever I want (I still go out, dw)

-Friends on discord and some IRL

-Money money monayyyyyyyyyyy

-Perfect health and mental health, no problems with my body

-Never getting yelled at ever again or abused/nobody gets abused/abuse doesn't exist. Yellers don't exist.

& a lot of other personal things

You guys got this! You can get your dream life! Go for it! *I didn't get my dream life yet, that's why the title reads:

"SUCCESS STORY (𝗺𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗳𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴)" When you put "manifesting in the title it means you haven't gotten your desires yet but you're doing it to help you live in the end. SO please don't be angry or offended.*

[charlotteharlatan]

Do you ever think about what would have happened if Mary Hodges (formerly Mary Loquacious) hadn’t interrupted Crowley and Aziraphale’s “intimate moment”?

Because I do. I think about it a lot.

First off, the way that this shot is set up is perfect. Mary - Mary who had a key role in the whole “Antichrist shuffle” fiasco, and who is a walking reminder of the approaching apocalypse that will separate Aziraphale and Crowley - is literally coming between them. The show is full of these beautifully simple, yet easy-to-miss moments that only last a few frames.

Now, on its surface, this part of the scene mostly plays as humorous because Crowley and Aziraphale are sexless-by-default, non-human entities who just happen to come across to most humans as a very aesthetic queer couple. So naturally, Mary makes the same assumption as every other human that so much as glances in their direction, and isn’t that a laugh?

Except that…she’s not actually wrong about it being an intimate moment. Not just in the physical sense, although I think this is the closest we see them physically get in the whole first season (not counting being literally inside each other’s corporations, I suppose).

But it’s intimate in the emotional sense too, because Crowley is worried and stressed about having lost the Antichrist, and now on top of everything else he’s got Aziraphale calling him “nice” and poking at some very old wounds (if he’s so “nice” then why did he Fall?). And Crowley is also probably *frightened* - they’re inside a former Satanic convent that kept regular contact with not just Crowley himself, but also Hastur, and probably other demons too. For all Crowley knows, someone from his side could still be lurking about; they could overhear and get them both in big trouble.

And as if all that weren’t enough, I don’t think I’m imagining a healthy dose of frustration with Aziraphale in the mix either. Just a few minutes prior, the angel essentially tempted Crowley into miracling the paint stain out of his coat, and then broke their rules by saying “thank you” for it. Aziraphale has spent at least the last few centuries sending him some very mixed signals and we can see that Crowley is done with them dancing around each other. That game was more or less fine before, they had time, all the time in the world. But now, in just a few days, all the time in the world will be ENDING. And yet here’s Aziraphale, playing the same game as always, acting like nothing between them has changed, even though they both know better.

So yeah, it all comes to a head in that moment, and Crowley (sort of understandably) loses it a bit. He won’t actually hurt Aziraphale and they both know that, but he has to get across to the angel SOMEHOW that he’s experiencing some Big Feelings. And he doesn’t have a whole lot of options as to how to do that. He’s too worked up to communicate effectively. So he goes with the wall slam. This causes an emotionally charged situation which we’re primed to think will have an emotional payoff - the camera pulls in close, a dramatic transition, drawing us in to the tension of the moment right along with Crowley and Aziraphale.

And then there’s Aziraphale, who…doesn’t defend himself at all. Aziraphale, who is kind but far from defenseless, who used to guard the gate of Eden with a flaming sword, who was supposed to fight in a platoon of angels in the final battle. He’s no pushover, and yet he lets himself get literally pushed over. It doesn’t even seem to occur to him to stop Crowley, not even as he’s wrinkling his precious coat.

And maybe this is just my read of this scene, but Aziraphale’s reaction to Crowley coming into his personal space is interesting in and of itself. He doesn’t act as if this is the first instance of Crowley being that close to him - and it is CLOSE. Their lips are centimeters apart. Their noses are touching.

And one might well say that all of it happens so fast that Aziraphale is caught off guard and freezes up, but as so many have already pointed out about this scene, just after Mary interrupts he looks…blatantly longing, and then more than a bit put out.

And after Crowley lets him go, he casually fixes his clothes and goes straight back to bickering. Which may be partially a defense mechanism, because they don’t have time to talk about what just happened, there clearly won’t be any emotional resolution right now. But really, wouldn’t “you go too fast for me” Aziraphale be more rattled if that were truly the first time they had crossed that physical boundary and shared space like this? He looks affected, certainly, but quickly shakes it off.

And, to take it one step further: Aziraphale knows Crowley. He knows what words are likely to set him off. He has an established pattern of having Crowley do things for him, based on Aziraphale’s own prompting (see also: wordlessly asking Crowley to help Hamlet become a hit). Aziraphale does as much tempting to get Crowley to do “nice” things as Crowley does to get him to do “naughty” things. All of which is to say, Aziraphale may have actually been baiting Crowley here, but the bait is just a little too effective, and Aziraphale isn’t fully prepared for the intensity of the response he gets. But there’s a strong case to be made that by calling the demon “nice,” he’s looking to get a specific reaction out of Crowley. Again, not the healthiest form of communication, but it’s what they have in this context, because honesty would be too dangerous.

Which brings me back to my point: it IS an intimate moment, in more ways than Mary could have possibly realized, and what if she hadn’t walked in on them? How would Crowley have finished his sentence that got cut off, and how would Aziraphale have responded to it, to Crowley’s outburst of emotion, or to their proximity?

Maybe he would have gently and politely pushed Crowley away - but to me, something about his expression and body language says he wouldn’t have. Because Aziraphale is tired of dancing around this too, actually, and in the heat of the moment, he may just have closed the distance. Especially if they’ve had “intimate moments” before this one.

And between you and me, I think they did, and I think it was after Crowley saved Aziraphale and his books during the Blitz. It’s a solid explanation for the increased tension between them in the holy water scene.

Anyway. This meta has been sitting in my drafts since before the first trailer came out, S2 is only nine days away, and I’m clearly very normal about all of this.

[gay-jesus-probably]

Let me just preface this by saying everyone is allowed to have their own opinions, TOTK is a really fun game, and I'm glad that other people have been able to enjoy the story as well.

...But I'm being dead serious with my complaints about the narrative being 100% imperialist propaganda. And I'm getting really tired of people replying to those posts by saying it can't be imperialist propaganda, because imperialism is bad and the game says that Hyrule is the good guys.

Like, guys. That's not the argument you think it is. Yes, I am aware that the game tells us Ganondorf is a flat, one dimensional character with no ambitions, interests or motivations beyond destroying the entire world for the hell of it, and also it's totally not racist because he's green, not brown like literally every other member of his race. Unfortunately literally all of these things are kind of the entire goddamn problem.

See, the thing is, everyone trying to make these arguments is accepting the game at face value. Hyrule is the perfect and almighty nation chosen by the demigod Zonai, and whose royal family has the right to rule due to their divine heritage. The other races exist to serve the glory of Hyrule, and they're happy to do it. Ganondorf is pure evil and must be stopped at any costs.

But that's not how anything works. The story informing me that Hyrule is the ultimate good that has done nothing wrong is the whole goddamn reason why I don't trust Hyrule at all. There's always more of a reason than that. And the game fucking suggests there was more going on! Ganondorf mentions Rauru has repeatedly 'invited' the Gerudo to become Rauru's subjects, and let's be clear here, it doesn't matter how peaceful those 'invitations' were, when the guy who owns every single magical nuclear missile in the world repeatedly demands you surrender to him, there's always going to be an implied threat of 'do it or get magically nuked'. Just that power difference alone shows us exactly why Ganon would feel threatened enough to invade. It's because Rauru was holding a gun to his head, and Ganon was expected to just trust that he'd never pull the trigger.

And yes, even if it wasn't intentional Hyrule was always threatening to wipe out the other nations, considering the entire royal family walked around openly wearing their magical nukes as cute accessories. If they couldn't be safely hidden away, there wouldn't be four other secret stones sitting untouched in a vault until the last second.

But that's never acknowledged. Of course Hyrule is the only nation with the right to the secret stones; even if other races get to touch them, they can only have them if they swear eternal blind loyalty and servitude to the glory of King Rauru and Princess Zelda. Ganon wanting to have one magical nuclear bomb out of a stockpile of eight of them is proof that he's dangerous and evil. I mean my god, what if he just walked around all day wearing a magical nuke and using its power for his own benefit, that would be terrifying. It's only okay when Hylian royalty does it.

And you can't argue that Ganon betrayed his own people, considering we don't get to know fucking anything about his relationship with his people. He's shows as the leader of the Gerudo, we're told he's a hero to his people, he has soldiers that loyally follow him into battle... and then oh nevermind, they all hate him and will spend eternity trying to atone for sharing a race with him. How did the entire race do a complete 180 in the span of at most a few months? Who cares, what's important is that now they accept they exist to serve Hyrule so they get to be the good guys now and we don't need to know why they were following Ganondorf, or why they stopped following him.

Basically my point is that yeah, I fucking know how the game insists everything went down. That's the entire reason I think it's imperialist propaganda, because the entire story feels like Hylian propaganda to conceal and justify some horrific atrocities that caused all of this. I literally do not believe that I'm getting the story through reliable narrators, especially considering that the only people allowed to actually tell me the story are all the characters that have the most reasons to be heavily biased in favour of Hyrule.

When the game shows me protagonists that have a massive amount of power and control over the entire world, then says the bad guy doesn't like that system just because he's evil, and literally nothing and nobody in the game says anything to oppose that take, I have some questions about what the fuck the story isn't telling me. And I'd really appreciate it if people would stop trying to argue with me just by telling me to stop asking those questions.

[theostrophywife]

kiss with a fist | chapter two.

masterlist 💋 chapters 💋 playlist

pairing: theodore nott x reader.

song inspiration: baby said by måneskin.

author's note: i'd apologize for the filth, but i'm not actually sorry and at this point you should expect it from me. enjoy theo's cheeky mouth. he singlehandedly started the sassy man revolution.

A strange sense of deja vu washed over you as soon as you walked into the potions lab. Buried deep in the dungeons, the room had always made you feel a bit claustrophobic. You were used to the airiness of Ravenclaw Tower with its twisting spires, starry glass domed ceiling, and four story bookshelves. You couldn’t even see the sky from this far below. 

But you supposed that the Slytherins preferred their dark and dreary viper’s nest. 

Speaking of serpents, Theo slinked into the classroom with his eyes half-closed, nearly running into the wall. His hair was a tousled mess like he’d just now rolled out of bed. The faded emerald hoodie and gray sweatpants he had haphazardly thrown on looked considerably more casual than your cable knit sweater and plaid skirt. 

“You’re late,” you scolded sharply. “How are you late? You literally live here.”

“S’too bloody early.”

Theo yawned lazily as he settled into the seat beside you. He cocked his head, dragging his gaze up and down your body before flicking a stray lock that had fallen out of your braid crown. You always kept your hair up since prefect duties had you running around the castle for the majority of your day. This morning, it was even more prudent to tie it back since you would be working with volatile potions and an even more volatile boy. 

“Are you always so prim and perfect?” 

“Are you always so sloppy and underwhelming?” 

Theo snickered, unfazed by the comment. “Someone’s grumpy this morning.” 

“You would be too if you woke up at the ass crack of dawn to nick a muffin from the kitchens.” 

The sad looking pastry sat between you, partially crushed from being hastily stuffed into your book bag after barely evading the house elves. 

All that hard work disappeared before your eyes as Theo devoured the muffin in seconds. The bloody git had the audacity to swipe your thermos off the table and tipped its contents directly into his mouth, crumbs and all. 

His face immediately contorted into disgust. “What in the bloody hell is this?” 

“Pumpkin spice latte.” 

“Pumpkin what?” 

“It’s a muggle thing.” 

“It’s an abomination, is what it is.” 

You snatched the thermos back. “No one told you to drink it. Do you even know how long it took for me to collect enough instant coffee packets to last the whole term? And here you are wasting it.” 

Theo looked properly scandalized. “Why on Godric’s green earth would anyone drink coffee from a packet? You don’t have one of those—what do you call them—expression machines?” 

“Espresso,” you corrected. “No, Theodore, I do not have an espresso machine because that would require electricity, which doesn’t really fit this castle’s medieval aesthetic.” You paused. “How do you even know about those?” 

“I’m half Italian. How would I not know about espresso?” 

“You called it expression.” 

“Yeah, well, my nonna doesn’t have all of her teeth so sorry for pronouncing things incorrectly. If you don’t like it, take it up with that crazy old strega.”

You fought the urge to laugh. The little anecdote would not distract you from the mission. “Right, if you’re quite done insulting my taste in coffee, we should get to brewing.”

“You don’t have taste in coffee. That’s the problem.” You glared at him, causing Theo to sigh deeply. “That was for my countrymen. Go on, then. Show me what you’ve got so far.” 

Theo watched silently as you lit your cauldron with a flick of your wand. Between you floated your advanced potions textbook, turning its own pages as you carefully followed the recipe. It didn’t matter that the instructions were so ingrained in your mind that Luna said that she’d heard you muttering it in your sleep. You were still going to follow the bloody book like it was your first brew.

The ingredients were simple. A sprig of wormwood. Two crushed newt spleens. Three blood slugs diagonally sliced with surgical precision. Four ashwinder eggs grinded into a fine powder. Most importantly, five crushed petals from the Angel’s Trumpet flower, which the draught derived its name from. Bring to a gentle boil. Wait precisely twenty minutes. Stir counterclockwise. Then clockwise again. 

“It’s clockwise and then counterclockwise,” Theo declared, speaking for the first time in nearly half an hour. 

“The book says the opposite.” 

“I know what the book says.” 

You brandished the ash stirrer in your right hand like a wand. “This wouldn’t be some clever ploy to take out your academic rival, would it?” 

Theo rolled his eyes. “First of all, I prefer nemesis. Second of all, you’re the one more inclined to violence out of the two of us. If anyone should fear for their life in this room, it would be me.” 

“Fair point. But how are you so sure the instructions are wrong?” 

“Because this has never failed me.” 

With that, Theo pulled out a small book from his pocket. It expanded as he touched it, nearly taking up half the table. The book was old, ancient even, with a worn leather cover that you highly suspected to be made of dragonhide. The title glowed with an eerie silver light. 

Il grimorio della famiglia Marchesi.

The grimoire of the Marchesi family. 

“Marchesi?” you asked in disbelief. “As in, the Marchesis of Triora?” 

The Marchesis were an ancient wizarding family that traced their ancestry back to the small Italian village of Triora. The city of witches, they called it. Their most notable ancestor was Alessandra Marchesi. The young strega was much changed by the witch trials that had swept over her sleepy town during her childhood, but instead of shunning muggle influence, Alessandra embraced their queer traditions and used it to her advantage. 

She tracked the inventions of her non-wizard counterparts diligently and reverse engineered it for magical purposes. The pages of her grimoire were said to be filled with invaluable knowledge. Alessandra invented potions, charms, and even hexes that helped shape the wizarding world as you knew it today. Her ideas birthed a sort of magical renaissance in the strenghe community. 

Under her leadership, the Marchesi family produced some of the most powerful witches and wizards not only in Italy, but Europe as a whole. Some of them had even attended Hogwarts and were unsurprisingly sorted in your house. 

Alessandra Marchesi was a visionary like no other and a legend amongst the Ravenclaws. Any one of your housemates would have killed to lay eyes on her grimoire. 

And here it was, propped casually in front of you. 

In the hands of Theodore Nott, of all people. 

You stared at the worn yellow pages, eyeing the elegant script with such intense scrutiny that you almost went cross eyed. The writing was in Italian, but that didn’t stop you from devouring every word. 

“I can’t believe that I’m reading the Marchesi grimoire,” you muttered to yourself. “Written by the Alessandra Marchesi herself.” 

“I’m flattered that you’re so interested in my family.” 

“The fact that you’re even related baffles the mind.” 

Theo rolled his eyes and pointed at the bottom right hand corner of the page. Senso orario. Antiorario. 

You knew enough Italian to realize that Theo was right. “Is this how you’ve been first in potions all this time?” 

He gasped dramatically. “Your lack of belief in my skills is highly offensive, but not entirely unexpected, diavolina. The grimoire is helpful, but my nonna only recently bestowed this little family heirloom to me this past holiday. I’m afraid that I’ve been beating you with my own talents for years.” 

You didn’t know if that disturbed or comforted you. 

“Why share it with me?” you asked. 

If the roles were reversed, you certainly wouldn’t. The grimoire gave Theo an edge that he could’ve easily kept to himself. As a Ravenclaw, your first instinct was to guard and covet knowledge in order to climb the academic hierarchy. There was very little you wouldn’t do to secure first place. Perhaps you were more similar to the Slytherins in that way. 

“I thought the nerd in you might appreciate it,” Theo teased. “Plus, I didn’t want you to think that I was cheating. When I beat you once and for all, I want you to know that I did so out of my own superior abilities.” 

“You’re incredibly smug, do you know that?” 

“I’m confident in my skills,” Theo said nonchalantly, plastering on that ever snarky smirk. “In and out of the potions lab, principessa.” 

He winked, which made you roll your eyes. “Now let the expert show you how it’s done.” 

You tensed slightly as Theo approached from behind. He chuckled as his chest brushed against your back, effectively caging you in. “Relax, diavolina. I have no plans to ravish you in this lab again. At least not until the potion is properly brewed.” 

A shiver skittered down your spine as you actively fought the urge to arch against him. Stupid hormones. Thanks to your ill advised romps, your body reacted to Theo’s touch against your will. You gripped the stirrer so tightly that it was one squeeze away from breaking. 

“Gently,” Theo murmured as his right hand enveloped yours. He rested his left hand against your hip, rubbing soothing circles underneath your cable knit sweater. The action had the opposite effect. If anything, a different sort of tension brewed between you. 

“Senso orario,” he said, reciting the instructions from the grimoire. Theo slipped his fingers between yours and stirred clockwise. Suddenly, the room felt much hotter than it had a second ago. 

You were keenly aware of his fingers lightly gripping your waist and for a horrible, nauseating moment, you imagined what it would be like to have him strip off your skirt and rip the wool tights off your legs so you could feel those rough, calloused hands against your bare thighs. 

“Antiorario,” Theo said after ten stirs. You startled, sweat dripping off your back as he reversed your movements. The mixture bubbled gently the more you stirred. 

“Shall I put it in?” His breath fanned over your neck, making you feel even more overheated than you already were. 

“What?” 

Theo’s lips twitched. “The petals. Shall I put them in or would you like to do the honors?”

“I’ve got it,” you said rather quickly. 

In your haste, you swiped the crushed petals off of the cutting board and dropped them into the draught. In the back of your mind, the instructions that you had so diligently memorized flashed like some horrible omen. Drop the petals one by one. You realized your mistake just as Theo pulled you towards him, shielding you from the cauldron. The entire thing roiled violently before spewing magenta down the back of Theo’s hoodie. 

You watched in horror as pepto bismol pink dripped from his curls. “I mean, I know you’d do anything to be first in class, but blowing me to bits is a bit severe, don’t you think?” 

“Oh my god,” you exclaimed, turning him over. “Are you alright?” 

The back of his hoodie looked like Theo had been involved in a rather violent skirmish with a cotton candy machine, but he appeared unharmed otherwise.

He smirked. “It’s touching that you care so much about my well-being. However disconcerting it may be.” 

“You shouldn’t have jumped in front of me, you idiot. That could’ve been so much worse. I will not have your death on my conscience, Theodore.” 

“Funny,” he said as he pulled his hoodie off. It raised the shirt underneath as well, giving you an unfortunate glimpse of his toned abs. “I wasn’t aware you even had a conscience.” 

“Fuck,” you cursed, completely ignoring his quip. “The grimoire.” 

For an excruciating moment, your heart felt like it had dropped to your stomach. If anything happened to the grimoire, you never would have forgiven yourself. Fortunately, there seemed to be a protection charm over the entire thing, because it appeared completely unblemished despite the geyser that had spewed out of the cauldron. 

“Oh thank Godric.” 

“That old thing’s got about a million protective charms on it that are older than either one of us,” Theo reassured you. “The grimoire is impervious to your violence. I, however, am not.” 

“Sit,” you commanded, pointing to a stool. “I’ll clean you up.” 

“I’m perfectly capable of casting scourgify.” 

You rolled your eyes. “Not everything has to be done with magic. Besides, I thought you’d jump at the chance to have me at your beck and call.” 

“Fair point,” Theo said, settling into his seat. “I wouldn’t mind being fussed over.” 

It took a few minutes for you to tidy up the mess on the table. Using magic would’ve been easier, but cleaning had always helped to clear your mind. Sometimes you spent an entire day scouring your dorm from top to bottom. Your housemates thought it was strange since a simple spell would’ve done the trick, but it was more a mental exercise than anything else. 

When you cleaned, it felt like your mind was being refreshed. Clearing out old thoughts, polishing new ideas, vacuuming unpleasant memories. It was vital to your sanity. You and Luna had bonded over it during first year. She was the only one who was willing to roll her sleeves up and get her hands dirty. It reminded you of doing spring cleaning with your mum and dad, whom you missed dearly. You had never really been away from them for this long until you came to Hogwarts.

You suspected that Luna knew that the obsessive cleaning had more to do with your homesickness than anything else, but you always appreciated the fact that she never pushed you to talk unless you offered. 

Despite what others might say, Luna was a stellar example of what a Ravenclaw should be. Clever, intuitive, and witty without all the pretentiousness that most of your housemates seemed to proudly parade around with. 

You thought fondly of your friend, who just this morning shot you a knowing look as you slinked off to the dungeons before anyone else awoke. 

Give my regards to Theodore, she said with a faint smile. 

The suspect in question regarded you with mild curiosity as you approached with a washcloth and basin. Even seated on the stool, Theo towered over you. The back of his neck was splattered with bubblegum pink and it dotted the sharp line of his jaw and even the cut of his cheekbones. 

Theo watched in silence as you wiped away the remnants of the failed draught. He wore a neutral expression, but his shoulders were tense and his eyes flickered over you like he was analyzing your every move. 

“If you wanted an excuse to touch me, you could’ve just said so,” he teased with a slight smirk. “No need for the assassination attempt, Y/N.”

“Trust me, Theodore. If I wanted you dead, you would be.” 

“Such a charming little bird,” he taunted. “Does that line work on the boys back home?” 

You raised a brow. That was the second time he’d brought the subject up. “Why do you ask? Jealous that I might be directing my feminine wiles on anyone other than you?” 

Theo scoffed. “No one else would be able to deal with your sparkling personality, diavolina.” Something flickered in those stormy eyes as you gently dragged the washcloth over his cheek. “I’m just curious as to what you’ve been up to this holiday. Haven’t you wondered what I was doing?”

“Contrary to your egotistical belief, I don’t spend every waking moment thinking of you. Besides, I figured you’d be doing something stereotypically rich like sailing around the Amalfi Coast and hunting dolphins for sport.” 

“As opposed to spending the entire break memorizing Slughorn’s personal recommendations so you can recite obscure potion knowledge in class?” 

You flushed, not bothering to deny the fact. Theo smirked. “I thought Uni was supposed to be more exciting than that. Shouldn’t you be getting smashed at pubs and taking strangers home?” 

“Not all of us can afford the distraction,” you said with an eye roll. “Or venereal diseases. Why the sudden interest, anyways? Don’t tell me that you’re planning on applying to Oxford. I don’t think I could handle another three years of you, Nott.” 

He wrinkled his nose. “If I were to attend university, it sure as hell won’t be at Oxford.” 

“Gods, you sound like one of those posh snobs from Cambridge.” 

“Cambridge is a world-renowned university with an excellent magical division.” 

Your eyes widened as you came to the realization. “Merlin’s beard, you are one of those Cambridge snobs, aren’t you? I can’t say I’m surprised.” 

Theo crossed his arms. “I’m not a posh snob.” 

“Theodore, you live in a bloody manor. I hate to break it to you, but you definitely wouldn’t be considered blue collar.” 

“I don’t live there anymore. Not since…” Not since my father was sentenced to Azkaban for being one of the Dark Lord’s top Death Eaters. 

“Right,” you said rather quickly. “Sorry—I—didn’t mean to—”

Theo patted your hand and grinned. “Oh don’t look so distressed, Y/N. I assure you I’m not living in squalor. Despite my father’s imprisonment, the ministry was kind enough to allow me to keep a flat in London.” You noted the hint of bitterness in his voice.  “Though if you ask my nonna, she’d tell you that an Azkaban sentence would be preferable to the dreary English weather.” 

That made you smile a bit. “I suppose the rain and muck is rather offensive to someone who’s used to the Italian sunshine.” 

“You have no idea,” Theo muttered. “You’d think I dragged her to the States instead of Primrose Hill.”

“Primrose Hill?” You asked, scrunching your brows. “I don’t remember there being a wizarding neighborhood there.” 

“There’s not,” Theo confirmed. “And I quite prefer it that way.”

There was an edge to his voice that told you not to press further. 

“So, I gather that you and your nonna are close?” 

“More like I’m the only grandchild that hasn’t disappointed her so far. Hence the grimoire.” 

“Is Cambridge her idea or yours? I heard that they have an excellent Potions program. Second to Oxford, of course.” 

The corner of Theo’s mouth quirked. “My mother’s, actually.” 

You knew that his mother had passed when he was young. Not much was known about the circumstances of her death, but it was assumed that Theo had witnessed it since he was one of the few students that were able to see the thestrals. 

“After she graduated from Hogwarts, mum went on to study potions at Cambridge. She used to take me to campus during her alumni events. One time I begged her to buy me a jumper from the stores and I wore that damned thing down to its last thread.”

There was a faraway expression on his face as he glanced out of the dungeon windows. The sunlight was barely starting to spear through the Black Lake, spreading a mosaic of colors across the potions lab. Theo looked contemplative. Pensive, almost. 

On the surface, his playful nature was very much on display, but somewhere deep within, you could see a hint of sadness bleeding through. It felt like you were intruding on a private moment. Witnessing something that you weren’t supposed to see. 

It was highly unnerving to say the least, so you deflected. “You know, Oxford and Cambridge have a deep seethed rivalry. It would be sort of poetic for us to end up on opposing sides again.” 

For a split second, Theo appeared to be analyzing you like some undecipherable code. Like he knew you were giving him an out. The scrutiny in his gaze unnerved you. Then his expression changed, that familiar smirk falling firmly back in place. He slipped on that cocky arrogance like a mask. 

You wondered how many times he’s done it without you even noticing. 

“More poetic than reenacting the very first detention that led us here?” 

Without meaning to, you glanced at the supply closet in the back of the room. Nearly a year ago, the two of you had been arguing about the best way to organize the crate of vials Snape had left for you when you finally pushed Theo against the wall and kissed him in order to shut him up. 

You swallowed thickly just as Theo’s slender fingers curved around the back of your thighs. The barrier of your wool tights suddenly felt oppressive even though you’d worn them for warmth. 

“What happened to not ravishing me until a successful brew?” 

“Seeing as you’re entirely hopeless, we might be brewing for the remainder of the day,” Theo said as he pulled you against him. His lips ghosted against the column of your throat, smiling when he felt you shiver underneath him. “And I don’t think I can wait that long without a taste.” 

“What if I say no?” you quipped. 

He pressed soft kisses along your jaw in response. “That may be an even bigger miracle than you brewing the damn draught, but go ahead, little bird. I’d love to see you try.” 

The two of you stared at one another. You were going to cave. Theo knew it. You knew it. If you were capable of saying no to the insufferable git, you wouldn’t be in this situation in the first place. Finally, you sighed. 

“Fuck it.” 

You pressed your lips against his, nearly toppling him over on the stool. He groaned against your mouth, walking you backwards to the supply closet. Theo lifted you up with ease and secured your legs around his waist, clearing the room in less than a minute. 

A smirk tugged at your lips when he briefly pulled away to nip at your neck. “What?” he asked, his voice a low rumble against your skin. 

“You taste like pumpkin spice.” 

There was nothing but pure hunger in his gaze as Theo nudged the door open with his foot. He set you down against a wooden slab before kneeling between your legs. 

You shivered when those hypnotizing eyes flickered back up to you. 

“Don’t worry, diavolina. I’ll taste like you soon enough.” 

If someone held you at wand point and forced you to say one nice thing about Theodore, it would be that the boy knew how to eat pussy. He probably authored the manual on it. Nott did things with his tongue that defied the very laws of nature. 

You whimpered as he flicked his tongue over your clit, circling not once but twice before lapping up your arousal like a man starved. When his slender fingers joined the mix, you could’ve sworn that you’d transcended reality all together. Theo remained transfixed on you even as he brought you closer to the edge, his forearm keeping your hips pinned down to keep you from arching against his mouth.

“Louder, principessa. I want to hear those pretty little moans when I make you come.”

The sound that came out of your mouth sounded nothing like you. “Oh god, oh my fucking god—“

“You can just call me Theo, you know.” 

You laughed hoarsely as you pulled his hair. “Twat.” 

“Oh, I’m quite enjoying yours at the moment.”

Whatever retort forming in your mind died on your tongue as his fingers curled inside of you, touching that spongy spot that had you seeing stars. The orgasm was a blinding light, an exploding supernova that incinerated your nerves as Theo brought you to the edge. When you came with a cry, he gave your clit a harsh suck and crooked his fingers until you felt overstimulated. Theo had no intention of slowing down even as you spasmed underneath his touch.

“You didn’t think that was it, did you?” Theo teased, his mouth glistening with your arousal. “We’re just getting started, darling. I went a whole summer without tasting you and I’m warning you now. I’m fucking ravenous.”

“I can’t—I can’t take any more, please.”

He chuckled darkly. “I do love it when you beg, but I know you can take more. I’ve seen you do it. I want your legs to shake so badly that you won’t even be able to stand before I’m done with you, diavolina. Then and only then will I consider stopping. Do you understand?”

Your throat felt dry, but you nodded all the same. “You’re a sadist, Nott.” 

“And you’re my little masochist," he said, smirking between your thighs. Danger flashed in those watercolor eyes. Theo was far from finished with you. "What a twisted pair we make.”

A shiver skittered down your spine as he yanked your hips towards him. “Now be a good little witch and spread those legs wide, dolcezza. We’re about to find out how many licks it takes to make a Ravenclaw scream.”

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[twisted-wonderland-memories]

Housewardens X (G/N)! Reader, but the reader loves to make fun of horror game weak jumpscares.

Summary: The Lion, the Witch, And the Audacity of you inviting the housewardens to have a sleepover with you on newely invented Ramshackle. As you expected it was chaotic and there are SOME that wants you to sleep early, but you insisted that since you are the host you let them do what they want aside from bossing you around…. However, thankfully there is no class tomorrow but….

You were playing a horror game on your giant tv that can act as a computer thanks to Idia’s big brain. Because of that you and Idia decided to stay up all night just to play a game that has a different genre, surprisingly Idia picked horror.

Little did he not realize that it was the WORSE mistake he could have ever done.

The moment you two booted up a horror game, the others soon finds themselves watching you play the horror.

Ones who ARE scared of horror is Azul, Kalim, and maybe Vil and Riddle?

Tho lets be real here.

Some are SCARED of horror, but you?

While you were playing a game, Idia was hugging your waist trying not to scream as the other housewardens are pissed at him for taking that hugging spot. Leona was casually lying on the floor but curious about the situation, Vil who was finished with his makeup has ligit time to watch everyone, Kalim was watching cheerfully while poor Azul was hugging his pillow, Malleus and Riddle are watching in anticipation tho one difference is that Riddle was secretly melting in fear at the sight of the creepy atmosphere.

They were all wondering why did you have the guts to go even further into horror, who raised you to have guts for this?

You who literally have grew up with playing or watching horror games and horror novels, you are no stranger to this.

Finally, a jumpscare happen and some of the housewardens had screamed a little.

You on the other hand…..just laughing at the weak scare.

“PERFECT WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING AT THAT JUMPSCARE?!”

“AHAHAHAHAHA!!!! IM SORRY ITS TOO FUNNY!!”

“Are you simply laughing at us for that?!”

“PPFFTT NOOO!!!”

You cant stop laughing that it was angelic even if its at…this situation…

“Games these days loves to make a jumpscare worse!!! Its too funny!! Hahahaha!!!”

They soo get that…..you laugh just of a simple jumpscare that is…. very weak…

They don’t know who is worse, you or the Leech Twins???

“Child of man, if that is funny…. Then why are we spooked over this?”

You then explained to them that you grew up watching or playing horror games, mentally questioning the characters weird decisions, slowly understanding their characters even if it was very bad. They soon understand it but you did told them that you were honest that you too also get spooked when you saw it for the first time, tho you decided NOT to tell them the WORSE part of horror just for you and for them.

They finally understand it, and you told them if they can’t sleep cause of this you offer to let them stay with you when they are sleeping. Kalim was happy about it and so was Malleus, Leona was willing to do that, while the others just blush but nods accepting that offer. Maybe a sleep over with you wasn’t so bad after all.

You told them various type of horror games but you wouldn’t dare to tell them the disturbing parts, sure there are some that are curious but you warned them that it would traumatize them even more if you DID told them the harsh truth of horror. Thankfully Idia barely knows much about horror but he does agree to not look further to the disturbing parts, a few are curious but they had to understand your warnings. As a result you continued to play the horror game with no fear, and soon Idia gets your point as to why you laugh at weak jumpscares since it DOES feel weak.

Sure jumpscares aren’t scary but its the atmosphere that DOES show the real horror, imagining the scenario would bring nightmares.

Once you finally finish a horror game….

They wanted to stay with you so they can sleep well.

Sure there is Malleus and Leona who isn’t shaken. Riddle who looks normally fine along with Vil and Kalim, Idia and Azul are scared shitless. But there is NO WAY IN HELL they can sleep alone cause of that.

You brought this up to yourself, but it was Idia that made things worse but that isn’t on him. That was on you who played a horror game from start to finish.

Soon enough you decided to make a large bed for everyone to sleep with you, plus you literally have to add some comforting music to make them feel better and yet. If you the reader is imagining that they are doing that on purpose to act scared I don’t even know what will.

In a platonic way they would try to sleep over the fear or simply just ignore the horror and just went straight to bed.

But if some had a crush on you they would stay behind and be with you even if it was fear.

But if ALL of them had a crush on you, yeap definitely need a huge bed just to pamper all of them.

Riddle - If its Riddle, he would be clingy if its in private. Tho he did try his best to keep an straight face, however, it makes him happy when you decided to keep him company before he had a peaceful sleep.

Leona - Ehhh, he kept a straight normal face like it’s nobody’s business. But he will cuddle you to sleep, after all he will be mean to you to not get up after that.

Azul - What have you done to this poor octo boi, cause of that Azul is EXTREMELY clingy to you and you literally have to pet him to make him sleep, but you are NOT allowed to tell this to the twins.

Kalim - Its hard to imagine being scared, but he does love to cuddle you to sleep. He would simply cuddle with you to sleep, after all he may not understand horror very well but he surely loves to cuddle you for one reason. And that is to protect you.

Vil - You had NO idea Vil had to keep up a straight face to hide his shaken fear, cause of that he has to cuddle you to sleep but EXPECT a scolding and a reminders from Vil NOT to do that again.

Idia - He had NO idea that you can handle that well, but he does appreciate cuddling with you. But at least he has someone like you to tell him which horror games that are worth it laugh at.

Malleus - Bro isnt scared? No idea, but one thing is for certain. Malleus would LOVE to cuddle with you when its time for sleep, it makes him feel very comfortable from what he had witnessed, tho he does love to rehear your laughter again.

[ashthemadwriter-archived]

Smacking their ass

Fandom: Jujutsu Kaisen

Pairing: Sukuna, Toji, Itadori, Megumi, X Fem!Reader

Genre: Humor

Format: Drabble

Warnings: Suggestive content, Mild NSFW content on Toji's part cuz he's daddy

Word Count: 0.8K

A/n: For a person who hates her ass to get slapped and loves to slap her man's ass, I'm a bit bold.

↳Sukuna

It wouldn't take him long to notice your small steps approaching him from behind. He can tell how hard you're trying to remain unnoticed from the way you hold your breath and avoid making the slightest noises, and it might have been efficient, really; if you hadn't chosen the wrong person to mess with.

"Don't even think about it"

His serious tune is enough to freeze you in the spot, your eyes twitching with surprises as you watch his figure from behind.

Not even bothering to turn around. Of course.

"I... I was..." "No need to make up excuses, brat. I already know about everything going on in that little head of yours"

He now turns around to show off that playful smirk of his, and you both know that he doesn't need to remind you that you can't play anything funny on the strongest creature in the world. You then gasp when you feel a harsh slap against your butt, which has enough force to make you jump in the spot.

"See? That's how it should be" He gives you one last chuckle before going back to whatever he was doing, leaving you all sulky and unsatisfied with how things turned out in the end.

↳Toji

Years of going to secret missions and slaying people earned him an amazing hearing ability, so he will sense your appearance the minute you step inside the room. You were never good at sneaking up to people, but that doesn't mean he can't pretend like he isn't aware of your presence. He's curious to know what you're planning on, after all.

So when you stand behind him and aim for his butt, you think that you've won; but just a second before your palm lands on his ass, your hands are suddenly seized by his,twisting them so your body falls into his embrace, your back facing his chest.

"What do you think you're doing?" His low pitched whisper against your ear is enough to send shivers down your spin.

"Misbehaving now are we? Well, I guess I don't have any choice but to teach you some manners"

When he slaps your ass for the hundredth time as youre bent over on his lap, you low key regret planning on doing something like this to him; but deep down, you knew it would turn out like this, and you would be lying if you say that your wetness Is caused by something else, not the amount of power he has over you.

↳Megumi

It's a casual date night, you on the couch watching TV as your boyfriend prepares dinner which he got its recipe from Itadori. The only difference is that tonight your favourite show got cancelled and the now the news is being broadcast instead. It's only natural for you to feel bored and peek in the kitchen to check on Megumi, right?

And when you do, you see that everything is clean, the dishes are all washed, a pleasant smell has filled the room, everything is so perfect; yet all that catches your attention is how nice his butt looks from behind as he's standing in front of the cooker.

Target locked, processing attack, three, two, one...

Slap!

"Nice ass man!"

He doesn't have to turn around so you can see his reaction. From how he suddenly froze and his whole body tensed up, you can tell that the poor man is stunned.

When you leave him behind cause apparently, "your job is done", he can clearly hear you burst out into laughter, and he cannot help but to think about how you're going to be the death of him.

↳Itadori

Watching Itadori doing literally anything is pleasant to the eye. The way his muscles protrude against the fabric of his hoodie when he bends to pick up things from the floor has you drooling over the sight. But the thing that's giving you the massivest brainstorm at the moment is, how come you've never noticed how much of a fine ass this man has?

You can't take your eyes off it because, it's right there? In front of you? With nobody touching it???

Maybe God is trying to give you some hints, which you'll gladly pick up.

So when he bends over, again, to reach out for the tray that used to contain sweets, suddenly something hits his ass, not so gently.

Of course the man is shocked; so when he turns around to see who's this trespasser that has violated his privacy, he's met with your huge ass smile and your brightened face.

"Quite a nice ass you got there, my Friend"

Itadori would've thanked you when he got through the whole situation eventually, but all he can think about now is how you called him "Friend" instead of "boyfriend"

Reblogs are appreciated! :)♡

[wonbie]

necessities . 엔하이픈 . shopping with enha

warnings ¿ not proofread genre ¿ fluff © wonbie

lee heeseung

on your daily trip to the convenience store heeseung tags along. he says he just wants to accompany you but you know thats not the case. instead he doesnt want you to pay for your snacks. he wants to be a good boyfriend and pay for everything you buy. you even tell him you're okay you got it but he doesnt care. HE WANTS TO PAY!!

park jongseong

mister gentleman. he took you to the mall so you could buy a dress for a wedding you were gonna attend. you try everything on and do a mini fashion show for him. with each dress a smile is visible on jay's face. he says you look perfect in everything. HES ALWAYS COMPLIMENTING YOU!! anyways after your done he picks out the most expensive dress and pays for it. even tho you said you'd pitch in he doesn't want you to.

sim jaeyun

jake was running out of food in his fridge, oh no! so you decided to take him shopping. he gets everything he needs and even adds some sweets to the cart. but then he sees your favorite cookies and he sees you staring at them so he adds them to the cart. you take them out and put them back but jake shakes his head. "i dont mind paying just a few more dollars for you" and you're a blushing mess.

park sunghoon

sunghoon always comes back from the store with a surprise. whether you ask for one or not he's gonna bring one home. thats also the reason he never lets you go to the store with him. but today its unavoidable. after coming back from his parents house the store is on the way home so you both make a stop. you seperate from him and look for a surprise for him since ofc he's always buying you stuff. but when you come back he has TWO surprises waiting for you. you can never out do him.

kim sunoo

sunoo always begs you to buy him snacks and you do because you're the best girlfriend ever. but today was different. instead of asking you to buy them he decided to buy you your favorite snacks instead. he threw in one of his favorites too but he loved seeing the happiness displayed on your face.

yang jungwon

jungwon takes you clothes shopping. but he gets to pick out your clothes. why? well, its started out with a dare that you couldn't complete and now here you are. you think he's gonna pick some kind of hideous shirt for you to wear but instead he actually takes his time picking your clothes. he makes sure your comfortable wearing what he picked out and then he pays for them while you look around some more.

nishimura riki

every place riki saw candy he'd put it in the cart. he'd say its for you but in reality he just wanted some candy. so now you're in line to pay with a cart full of different types of candy. your cart literally looks like a bucket full of halloween candy. of course riki forgets his wallet so you end up paying for everything and when you get home you just wnat to tear into one of the candy bags but riki says you cant bc its his candy. you chasing him around the house until eventually he gives in to your desires.

paris' note . this was so fun to make!! i love the concept!! this is scheduled!

permt tl @jakeyzzz @luvistqrzzz @minholing send an ask or comment if you want to be added!!

[bestanimatedmovie]

Choose your favorite!

Vote in the other polls!

What fans say:

The Lorax:

Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse:

It had a very big impact on meme culture. And a really catchy soundtrack. Plus it has the silly sexy green man. What more could you want from a film.*

The Once-ler and the let it die song. This movie is glorious.

It is legit the mother of all great animated movies nowadays. From Mitchells vs the machines to the new mutant mayhem movie! The plot is so good and you can really see character development from almost all of the characters, plus the designs are BANGER.

THE MUSIC?? TOP FUCKING TIER. THE CASUAL DIVERSITY? IT ALSO HAS LITERALLY THE BEST SHOT IN CINEMATIC HISTORY (Miles rising after taking his leap of faith)

BRO THE ANIMATION IS SO SICK. The amount of sheer effort put into this movie is insane. The character growth was so amazing to watch and such a great movie to analyze. Best scenes are obviously the leap of faith. Actually gorgeous. And also the scene where aunt May sees Peter b after her Peter died. Her “you look tired, Peter” is just so heartfelt

Where the hell do I even start. The visuals are incredible and the plot is engaging. Every scene is perfect.

This film has EVERYTHING. Humor, action, inspirational scenes, kickass music, absolutely killer animation, an art style that is an homage to comic books, loveable characters, a talking pig, DR OLIVIA OCTAVIUS, I could go on

This is the best superhero movie ever made, the leap of faith is one of the best movie scenes of ever

The animation style is better than all the others, and makes the movie funnier too! The representation is also good, and the romantic storyline isn't too prevalent in the movie. Probably the best animation Marvel has made. My favorite scene is when the villains show up to Aunt May's house -- its my favorite fight scene!

I’m sure this movie’s been submitted already because it’s arguably the greatest animated film of all time. I have a personal connection to it because I saw it in theaters on opening night with my late father, and we both loved it and I still do. The animation is revolutionary and it’s one of the only 3 movies that make me cry.

gsksvbsvsbsvs I love everything about it, I love the animations, the story, the soundtrack also the style of animation AAAAAA its so beautiful its art it belongs in a museum i get goosebumps everytime I rewatch it

It’s just so good. All the characters are amazing and I love Miles dad. It’s hilarious and sparked my love for spider-man. It’s such a sweet movie about finding yourslef and has such a powerful message. I totally recommend it so I’m not adding spoilers, but like. Ohhhh, it’s so good.

Interesting villains, well-developed character arcs, a fresh take on Spider-Man, unique use of animation, funny, good use of multiverse that adds to the nature of the story being told, complicated character dynamics

It's the best animated movie because A: it takes one of the most well known comic characters of all time, kills him off in the first few minutes, and then shows you every cooler version of him. B: Has a large amount of representation in its main cast, considering that they're all versions of Spiderman, and that requires a white guy by default. C: everything in it is so well done I can't pick a favorite scene, but the most iconic is the jump off the skyscraper window.

The animation is incredible, the movie has so much story and heart, and there’s a perfect balance between humor and seriousness. And the soundtrack slaps

This is probably the best animated film I've ever seen. The animation is definitely the highlight, the way they blend comic book art styles and 3D animation is an absolute joy to look at and is so overwhelmingly creative, every frame of this movie is gorgeous. The impact this had on the industry is undeniable, as we start to see more and more movies getting more creative with their animation styles. It's not just the animation though. All of the characters are entertaining, all of the jokes land and the story is really well done. It leaves me blown away every time I watch it.

This movie kind of changed the western animation industry from the ground up. Apart from being expertly written, funny, and heartfelt, it is also stellarly animated, with a unique visual style that takes direct inspiration from the comic books it adapts and mixes 2d- and 3d-animation in a way and to a degree that hadn't really been seen before in western mainstream. Its critical and monetary success paved the way for mainstream 3d animation to open up to new and excitingly stylised movies that were like a breath of fresh air between the generic Pixar-style animation that had been the largely unchanged norm in the industry since Toy Story circa twenty years earlier**. ITSV divides the screen like panels on a comic page, it uses dots and lines for shading and gradients, doesn't shy away from lowering framerates for stylisation, and makes liberal use of onomatopoeia, both to comedic and dramatic impact. Impact frames and SFX are often hand-drawn and stunningly colourful, and even the simple dialogue scenes astonish with an expressiveness and realism in their depiction of emotions that makes me rewatch a two-second scene of Miles laughing fifteen times in a row. My favourite scene has to be the What's Up Danger scene, the emotional climax of the movie. Set to an absolute banger of a song, it is the moment the entire film has been building up to. I won't spoil anything plot-wise in case you somehow haven't seen this movie, but both from an emotional and a visual standpoint it is Fucking Dope. Conclusion: Spider-Man: Into the Spiderverse is my favourite movie of all time and I could talk about it for hours. If you haven't seen it, go watch it. Thank you.

Have you SEEN the Whats Up Danger/rising and falling scene? it's a work of art that makes me fall in love with storytelling all over again whenever I see it. Also the impact that it's had on animated film is absolutely being felt at current, if incrementally. Incredible film.

It has an amazing art style based on comics and mixed up due to genre differences. It's really fun and the characters are great, even the side ones. The story line is great and I love Miles and his family.

*Mod note: errr, quite a lot more than memes and music actually

**Mod note: amen

[xxoolii]

hope you are well

Can you do something with Hiccup Haddock

argh i'm such a hiccup whore, i mean who isn't?

I would absolutely love to do that for you!!

MDNI, im serious, i literally don't like you babe

warnings: jealousy(the green-eyed monster), praise, degrading, 18+ content, cream pie, not edited in the slightest, the idea is kinda over used but idc, angry sex

author notes: reposts are greatly appreciated! also finished exams so im able to write now, very excited to get into this!!

what you want?

uh oh, you had undoubtedly done it this time. at first, it had seemed like a totally innocent idea, but it had gotten out of hand, it wasn't your fault that the skirt you were wearing rode up every time you bent down in front of hiccup. there was something in his eye. Every time you bent down, a look that you almost couldn't place, it was almost primal, in the kind of way a hunter would look at its prey.

you loved it. you wanted more of it, and then a thought came to your mind. you gave him a polite smile, making your way in slow strides. Over to Snot lout, you crouch down next to him, and place your hand on his thigh. "wow your so smart I never noticed" him being totally oblivious, didn't understand the false nature of your compliment. But hiccup did, he knew that it was to riel him up and make him jealous. he stood up abruptly rushing towards you and snatching your hand off his thigh, yanking you away yelling some nonsense about you feeling sick and needing to go home.

he drags you out the door, throwing you over his shoulder as he makes his way to your house, the walk wasn't far and you were kicking and complaining the entire time, as if you hadn't caused this, as if this wasn't your desired reaction. he reached the threshold of your house and barged through the door making his way to your shared bedroom. you continue to wriggle, grabbing onto beams and doorways as he makes his way through the house. a futile effort on your behalf . he reaches his final destination, and gently throws you on the bed.

he looks at you with a predatory look in his eyes "What was that about huh?" he says this as he makes his way across the bed, hand snaking its way up your thigh. you decide in that moment that your going to play dumb, you've already committed to this act so you may as go all in. "what act?" you ask dumbly. he grabs your thigh roughly, other hand grabbing your chin and pulling you towards him. "you know exactly what i mean. or would you rather i just teach you a lesson?" he smirks knowingly at you, he wasn't dumb he knew you'd done it all for attention.

--------------------------------------------

and thats how you gotten here. your arms and legs ached as you felt him roughly pounding into you, moans echoing throughout the whole house. he was unrelenting and he was taking all of his frustrations out on you. his hands gripped tighter on your hips, pulling you to meet his thrusts.

your arms give out due to the speed and force he's fucking you with, your face meets the mattress, moans lost in the fabric. he's not slowing down, his groans and small moans show just how lost in your pussy he is. he spews out sweet praise, contrasting it with the perfect amount of degrading.

"your so pretty like this" "Wish I could have you like this all day honey" "You're doing so so good for me baby, just a little longer im almost there" Sweet pet names and sweet nothings running through your veins as he fucks you better than he ever has. once he gets closer his sweet praise switches to taunts and degradation. "aww poor baby cant take it anymore?" "isnt this what you wanted, pathetic whore"

his thrusts speed up, showing how close he is. you orgasm not too far behind you, the burning pleasure almost too much to bear. your moans and his groans make a beautiful symphony as you both grow closer, the way he strokes against your velvet walls drives you crazy. your body could only ever feel like this for him. white flashes over your eyes as you reach your release. squirting all over him. the sweet feeling of your pussy clamping on him sends him over the edge as he groans and presses his hips flush against yours releasing his seed deep inside you.

he pulls away, his cock covered in a mix of both of your juices. he flips you onto your back momentarily in awe of the way his cum rolls out of your clenching hole. then he speaks.

"hope your little game was worth it honey"

_________________________________

and thats it for today ladies, gents and non-binary pals! this is a little low effort because i started it during exams but im glad to finally be getting it done now!

[nokkihy]

PICS YOU AND MILES WOULD TAKE

HEADCANONS

- he loves taking pictures with (and especially of) you, he makes sure to take at least one everytime hes with you so he always has a memory of the time you spent together

- when he’s taking pictures with you, he always tries to throw something up 🙄 westside, 4 fingers up, shocker, he just throws it up as soon as he sees the camera

- and you have to be like

- “boy if you dont put that down and do something normal”

- so then he does and then its just the ��🏾, ✌🏾, or 🖕🏾

- but when he’s taking pictures of you..

- he goes all out

- and i mean all out

- acts like hes a pro photographer and goes

- “the lighting looks perfect in the angle” as hes on his knees and snaps 100 pictures

- throwing compliments as you try to hold in your laughter so you can get at least a few good pictures for the gram

- he ends up taking pictures of you as your laughing (literally the 🤭 emoji) and convinces you to post them as well

- he rarely takes pictures of himself, only when he just got his hair done and he’s taking a picture to show you

- he never posts pics of himself, unless it’s him playing basketball or baseball and you always make your way into one of the pictures no matter how much you try to convince him not to put you in them

- speaking of posting pics, if the two of you take a silly picture and you wanna post it, he’ll let you

- he tries to keep a serious attitude but when hes around his bae he doesn’t care about anything else but you

- he doesn’t care if he gets clowned by his friends, as long as you’re having fun he is too

@ nokkihy , all rights reserved