#its probably not as burned as it looks (its very dark brown but not black on the bottom) what with the general color of the bread

[milkweedman]

Found a dutch oven for like, astoundingly cheap yesterday and was finally able to try baking bread in one ! This is a poppyseed rye that I darkened with some molasses and cocoa powder, mostly out of curiousity (i often use molasses but this is the first time trying cocoa as well. Smelled super nice while baking). I added those after the first rise and didn't do a whole lot of kneading when i did, and it seems to have marbled, if the bit of exposed interior (didn't grease the dutch oven, and that part of the crust stuck) is anything to go by. Definitely overbaked it a little, but super happy with how much oven spring I got.

Also, the jams from last night. Very pretty reds.

[sapphicvqmpires]

❁ཻུ۪۪♡ who are you?

vampire series | shuri udaku | part 1

Pairing - vampire!shuri x black fem!reader

Word count - 17k (yup)

Contains - smut (18+), fingering, cunnilingus, clit play, overstimulation, choking/breathplay, biting, edging, strap-on sex, blood drinking, descriptions of blood, gaslighting (it’s a vampire story, so it’s a whole bunch of shady shit going on), and probably more I forgot

Divider From - @firefly-graphics

Sneak Peak - “Shuri…baby…” Your breathless whimpers forced Shuri to release you, her face drawing closer to yours, yet she looked so different. Her dark brown eyes transformed into a blood-red hue, her fangs fully extended, and her mouth stained with your blood. The image frightened you at first and Shuri looked away in shame, attempting to conceal the face she despised so deeply.

Tags - @inmyheadimobsessed @amplifiedmoan @vampzxi @abenomeiiii @heejayy @shurislover @shurismainbxtch @shuriszn @naomis-daydream @prettymrswright @pocketsizedpanther @gardenof-venus @tiii-iiiiii @verachii @ihearttish @playhousedistee @somethingcleaverandwhitty @niyahwrites @tishsrealwife @oceean @sookiesookie @myaraines @cafehyunji @6-noir @ventingfanfics @marsology @imjusthere2readbruv @desswright29 @ooglyboooglybitxh @sweetalittleselfish-honey @kisskourt @shaiwritesss @sapphicbarbz @darkangelchronicles (comment if you want to be tagged in future fics, 18+ only)

Writers Note: whew fuck, this was definitely the most challenging thing I’ve ever written for tumblr. I could’ve went on and on, but I realize that’s not ideal. This is part 1 of a three part story, this part is mostly just an introduction to Shuri and her character, delving into her past and her life as vampire while introducing the vampire lore. Reader is nosey af but who wouldn’t be if they got to question a vampire? I hope you guys enjoy this read! I always love reading your comments!

“If I touch a burning candle I can feel no pain, If you cut me with a knife it's still the same

And I know her heart is beating, and I know that I am dead

Yet the pain here that I feel, try and tell me it's not real

It seems that I still have a tear to shed” - tears to shed, the corpse bride

November 23rd, 2411, New York

❁ཻུ۪۪♡ You found yourself sitting in a bar, one that sat high up in the air as most buildings did in the now 25th century. The night sky enveloped you, its vastness serving both as the reason you are able to walk the earth and the reason you want to leave it, yearning, if only for a brief moment, to bask in the sun's warmth seeping through your dark skin once more. Those days were dearly missed. You missed early morning brisk winter breezes. You missed chocolate sundaes on balmy afternoons. It was the little things that made life meaningful, and you missed it all but most importantly, you missed her and this couldn't possibly be her. It would be too much of a coincidence to cross paths in this exact space at precisely the same time, especially when space and time had lost their significance to you ever since your transformation…that was until this very moment. Moving closer cautiously, you walked in silence, struggling to stifle your gasp.

It was her.

She retained the same appearance as the day you first encountered her; ageless, timeless, and effortlessly divine. That finely chiseled jaw remained a masterpiece, her dark skin still the epitome of flawlessness, and her hair wore the same exact short curls that framed her face in a manner that rendered her the most attractive person you have ever encountered. Even after nearly four centuries, you have yet to meet someone like Shuri Udaku. If a heartbeat resided within you, it would undoubtedly be pounding against your rib cage. If breath were still at your disposal, it would stagger beyond your control. However, for the past 400 years, you possessed none of the two. No breath. No heartbeat. You were frozen.

Closer and closer, you moved forward, until finally you took the empty bar stool next to her in the very empty bar.

“Shuri?”

She paused. Her body stayed deathly still right before she turned to see the face she missed so much.

“Y/n…?”

“Yeah…”

And while your heightened senses surpassed any human perceptions, the world seemed to suddenly go quiet, embracing a rare moment of absolute silence. It was a profound silence, the kind you craved after a prolonged period of listening to the world and all its presence for so long and it seemed Shuri felt the same. Both of you embraced this quietude, finding solace in its embrace, until she eventually broke the stillness with the very mouth you had once intimately known.

“It’s been…it’s been almost 200 years, s’thandwa.”

That name. Oh, how you missed that too.

“Yeah…I guess it has been.”

February 16th, 2022, New York

The day was warm, the sun reaching its peak in the sky while your dark attire absorbed its radiance. You reveled in the comforting sensation it provided, a soothing contrast to the ache settled within you, a certain feeling of content that masked the emptiness you felt. Yes, the sky was bright, the day was warm, but your heart was not. Not with the scene that surrounded you.

“We gather here today to commemorate our brother Jonathan. He was a friend to us all, a person that will truly be missed and cannot be replaced….”

You found it impossible not to internally sneer at the kind and flattering words used to depict your former partner, Jonathan, during his funeral. To everyone present, he was a gentle and caring man, someone adored by everyone who had crossed paths with him. However, you were all too aware of the person he was behind closed doors; a coward, a despicable individual who was good for nothing but the depths of pockets. He had used you as a mere pawn in his life, exploiting your exceptional beauty. You were nothing more than an object, a prized possession desired by many men, but he had claimed you. Your parents had practically arranged your marriage to Jonathan, a companion chosen for you due to his wealth. The plan was for you to marry him and become his perfect wife. That was until a week ago when he passed away.

“My son was everything a mom could want…,” Jonathan’s mother began, breaking into sobs as she mourned for her son you hated so deeply.

“He was…the most perfect boy. My baby boy. And y/n…” Her gaze connected with yours, her eyes filled with a pitiful sorrow that you could not reciprocate or even pretend to, and so you did nothing but offer her a weak smile as she proceeded. “My boy loved you, baby. He loved you with his entire being and I hope you know that.”

A pitiful smile graced your face, the only response you could possibly give her amidst your numbness. The pain and hollowness residing in your heart were not born from sorrow or profound grief over Jonathan's death, but rather from the absence of love and affection he gave you. The lack of love in a relationship that had consumed three and a half years of your life weighed heavily on you. All you had received was a shattered heart, and there was no one there to assist you in gathering the fragments except for yourself.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

The moment you closed your apartment door, a long exhale escaped you; a mix of relief and stress as you stepped into your now quiet space. It was vastly different from the usual banter Jonathan would welcome you home with, his tendency to pinpoint faults in you as an outlet for his anger that had nothing to do with you in the first place. Yet now, you stood alone. The sentiment was uncertain and you were not sure how to feel about it, but there was an odd form of comfort in the deafening silence. Your mind was a whirlwind of thoughts, a tangled maze of broken strands. Amidst the chaos, your mind always retorted back to one single thing: your friend, Shuri.

You had arranged to meet with her in a couple days and finally address your suspicions head-on. You were well aware that you were most likely overthinking, perhaps being overly dramatic or even irrational, and that your theories might be far from the truth. But after a year of friendship, the burden of skepticism had become overwhelming. The feeling of being kept in the dark, the feeling that she harbored secrets and consistently hid things from you, had pushed you to a breaking point. You couldn't bear this constant uncertainty any longer. You were fully prepared to demand answers and possibly present an ultimatum because you were simply exhausted and as much as it would break you to have to remove Shuri from your life, it was what you needed to do if she refused to provide you with the solace and closure you needed, especially in times like these.

You proceeded with your night routine, changing into your pajamas and getting comfy in your now very empty bed. Was the bed always this large? Or did Jonathan just always make you feel small? Finally, after a long day, you allowed yourself to weep, sensing the tears tracing their path down your cheeks and absorbing into the softness of your pillow. You cried yourself into the most serene sleep you had in years.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

You sat at the diner where you and Shuri would always meet at late hours, waiting for her to appear so you could finally voice the subtle anger that had been building within you over the course of a year-long friendship. It wasn't just a matter of her being a weird individual disinterested in sharing about herself—it was everything about her. The way she spoke, the way she was ridiculously smart, the way she has done absolutely everything and been absolutely everywhere in her short 26 years of being on this earth. It seemed she spoke an almost inhuman number of languages, and you couldn't recall ever seeing her eat, despite her assurances that she did. Her handling of alcohol was reckless, yet you'd only witnessed her drunk once, maybe twice.

There were countless aspects that unnerved you, but the most unsettling was her adamant refusal to meet during daylight. She claimed it to be solar urticaria, a supposed sun allergy, and you believed her initially. However, her increasing avoidance of daytime interactions left you puzzled and frustrated. She wouldn't respond to your texts or answer your calls during daylight hours, making it impossible for you to visit her, even when she didn't have to leave her home. Strangely enough, you had never even seen her house.

The mounting suspicions were overwhelming, and you wondered if you were being silly. It couldn't be true, right? There was no scientific proof or evidence to support such a claim. But what else would your suspicions add up to? What other explanation was there, except that she might be a va--

"Hey, y/n," her velvety voice broke through your thoughts. She settled into her seat across from you, and you couldn't deny how fine she looked. She had always held a certain kind of beauty, and not in a friendship type of way; it was a beauty impossible to overlook, one that left a lasting impression on everyone, yourself included. It was an ethereal allure, almost divine in nature. She gave off an attractiveness that surpassed ordinary bounds, and you were no exception to its impact. It was a challenge to put into words, but she seemed otherworldly, perhaps even godlike in her allure. She was undeniably attractive, captivating beyond what your body could handle, yet you continually suppressed any attraction you felt towards her. After all, you were in a relationship, a terrible one, but a relationship nonetheless. The last thing you needed was to lose the only person you believed truly understood you because of a silly attraction you may have felt for her.

"Hello, Shuri," you responded, your voice carrying a hint of tremor from the nerves that had crept in. Shuri caught on, and her self-assured chuckle let you know she sensed the anxiousness that had taken hold of you, further quickening your heartbeat.

"You look beautiful," she remarked, attempting to ease your nerves, though both of you knew that did nothing but make it worse. Her words carried a magnetic charm, one that surpasses the human experience, causing the hairs on your arms to stand up. You managed a soft smile in response, genuine but subdued, as that was all you could offer right now and Shuri immediately picked up on the fact that something was off about you. There was a subtle shift in your demeanor and posture, a slight dimming of the twinkle in your eyes but it didn't escape her notice.

“What’s wrong, y/n?” You’re caught off guard because you didn’t think yourself to be that obvious. You knew for a fact you were never that transparent. But to Shuri, you almost always were.

“What do you mean?”

“Well there’s obviously something wrong.”

“Obviously? I’m just sitting here, I’ve said all but five words to you, how is it obvious??” Your tone turned a touch harsh, frustration evident as you were tired of Shuri's ability to see through you. Raising an eyebrow, she chuckled, revealing her perfect set of pearly whites.

“I’m sorry for your loss, by the way,” she said once she stopped her laughter. You huffed in annoyance, rolling your eyes as you crossed your arms.

“No need to be sorry…I’m almost relieved he’s good and gone.”

Shuri softly smiled, a smile you knew she tried to contain but it was no use.

“What?”

“Nothing…I just think…I think you’ll be much better without him. You never needed him, y/n.”

For a moment, you almost got caught up in her, lost in her words and the enchantment that peered behind her beautiful dark brown eyes but you remembered what you were here for, and you weren’t about to succumb into her hypnotic gaze as you often do.

“Shuri…I-I need answers…like…like, right now.” Even though your voice trembled, your request was resolute. You yearned for something from her, anything at all. And just when you thought you had the advantage, that same self-assured smirk reappeared on her face, as if she had been waiting for you to bring up the conversation.

“What?,” you questioned her facial expressions.

“What?,” she challenged back.

“No, you’re the one giving me that look so you tell me what's up.”

“The floor is yours, princess.”

You rolled your eyes, inhaling deeply as you debated whether to continue with this conversation. If your suspicions were wrong, you'd feel like a damn fool. Shuri would undoubtedly tease you relentlessly, something she already enjoyed doing. But you pushed aside all doubts and plowed forward despite the hesitations that surfaced in her presence. Clearing your throat, you released a hefty exhale before proceeding.

“Shuri…I know you’re gonna think I sound insane but I’m getting to a breaking point, and I just have to ask…”

“Then ask.”

You paused, glaring at her as you proceeded. “We’ve been friends for about a year now, and there’s no better way to put this but there’s just something incredibly off about you…like, it’s fucking with my head.”

Shuri bit the inside of her cheek, trying to contain her laughter.

“You are insanely talented at like…everything, you’ve been everywhere, you speak multiple languages, I’ve never met your family, or seen your house and I’m starting to question whether you even have a family…or a house…”

“Are you done?”

“Not even close. You never eat…or drink, but you drink an insane amount of alcohol almost everytime we go out yet I’ve seen you get drunk maybe once…?? Shuri, that's not humanly possible.”

“You’re listing things about myself like I don’t already know, pretty girl.”

She always knew her way with words.

“I’m not done.”

She gestured for you to proceed, resting her back against her chair.

“The sun…what is your deal with the day time??”

“I already told you, y/n.”

“No, don’t give me that shit. I don’t buy it…so you’re allergic to the sun or whatever…you can’t pick up your phone?? Answer your texts?? But as soon as the sun goes down…”

Shuri just sits there, interested but also unbothered and you weren’t sure how that made you feel. There was silence for a moment.

“You gonna say something or just sit there and look good all evening??”

Shuri said nothing but another chuckle.

“What’s so funny, Shuri? You’ve been saying nothing but laughing at me the whole time.”

“I was waiting for you to finish what you were saying.”

“I have nothing else to say.”

Shuri leaned in, placing her forearms on the table, her smug grin never wavering. Her eyes shifted between the two of your own, delving into the depths of your eyes. You swallowed, nerves building up in anticipation.

“Come on, y/n. You’re a smart girl. I’m sure you can figure it out.”

“I—“

“I don’t need to repeat everything you just listed. Why must I answer what you already know?”

“What are you saying, Shuri??”

“Don’t be stupid now. You know.”

“What do I know??”

Shuri arched an eyebrow, and you took in a sharp breath. It couldn't be. There was just absolutely no way.

“Uh uh. Don’t fuck with me, Shuri, this isn’t fucking funny!”

“I’m not playing with you, princess. I have no reason to anymore. You know.”

“Anymore?? What does that mean?? Tell me what the fuck is going on.”

“I’m not messing with you.”

A lengthy silence ensued as you both locked eyes, glaring eachother down. Shuri appeared unbothered, almost captivated by your frustration and that only fueled the fire that was coursing through your veins.

“Uh uh, there’s just no way. No fucking way,” you uttered in disbelief as you made your way out of the diner, coming face to face with the dark night that surrounded you every single time you were with her. Shuri rolled her eyes before she got up to follow you. You hurried behind the restaurant, hoping to get a moment of privacy to collect your thoughts, but that hope dissipated as you felt Shuri's firm grip on your wrist, causing you to flinch at her harshness. Shuri let go abruptly, offering no verbal apology, but her eyes held a silent regret at the action.

“Shuri, what the fuck is going on??,” you asked, attempting to keep your voice down but your mind was too boggled to remember you were still out in public.

“I’m gonna need you to keep your voice down, y/n.”

“Keep my….excuse me?? No! Don’t fucking tell what to do, Shuri! Tell me what the fuck is going on!”

“Y/n…,” a voice of warning, one that was accompanied by her firm stature.

“No, don’t fucki—,” but before you could complete your sentence, your body was wedged against the building wall, Shuri's palm firmly covering your mouth as her body trapped you in. She held you like that for a moment, admiring how you so easily yielded to her control even after your mouth refused to shut up for her.

“You’re a feisty little thing, aren’t you?” Your face softened just a bit, almost relaxing into her touch.

“Are you going to listen to me, y/n?”

You nodded, a smirk appearing on her face at the gesture.

“Good girl.” She let your mouth go. “No wonder Jonathan could not handle you.”

You scowled at her, eyebrows furrowing together as Shuri pinched your chin and tilted your head up just a bit. “Let me take you home and I will tell you everything you need to know. I’ll answer any important questions you have, baby, but you have got to listen to me. Do you understand?”

You were trembling, and though your pride nearly kept you from acknowledging it, fear gripped you. Fear of Shuri and whatever her motives might be. Your heart felt like it could burst through your rib cage at any given moment.

“Breathe, baby, breathe. I’m not gonna hurt you. Just let me take you home. Please.” Her plea seemed to carry a hint of desperation and it provided an odd sense of comfort. You knew that you would be okay and so you agreed.

The car ride remained silent, only the rhythmic patter of raindrops against the car window and Shuri's old tunes playing softly. Your heartbeat felt so loud, you swore you could almost hear that too…or maybe she could.

Once you get there, Shuri swiftly makes it to your side, helping you get out as she softly massages the skin on your wrist.

“I don’t need your help getting to my door, Shuri.”

“I just wanted to make sure you were ok.”

“I’m perfectly fine.”

She lets you go, trailing behind you as you make your way to your apartment.

You made yourself a cup of tea in an effort to soothe your nerves but the absence of conversation between you two left an eerie atmosphere in the space, one that surpasses the fact that you now live alone in a space that was once for two. The rain seemed distant, tapping lightly against your balcony window. Suddenly, the sound of her presence broke through your state of mind.

“So…are you gonna tell me what’s going on, y/n?”

You swallow, trying to contain your composure. “Nah, I’m waiting for you to tell me, Shuri.”

“I think you’ve gotten it all figured out now. Am I right?”

“But I want to hear it come from your mouth, Shuri. I wanna know it’s true because you told me.”

Shuri reclined, stretching her arms casually against the sofa, adopting an almost cocky posture as she grinned at you.

“You gonna fucking say something or what?,” you snapped in impatience.

Shuri raises an eyebrow as she releases a breathy chuckle. “You have such a mouth on you.”

Your eyebrows lightly furrowed together, before you rolled your eyes dramatically. “Yeah, whatever.”

“Fine. Let’s have it your way then. Let me reintroduce myself to you…Hello, y/n. My name is Shuri Udaku and I am a vampire,” she said with a nod of her head, as if the fact meant nothing. Your heart stops for a second before it begins beating uncontrollably, consumed with pure shock. Even though you already knew, you were never prepared for how it felt once it was made real.

“I can hear your heartbeat, princess. Tell me what you’re feeling. What’s going on in that beautiful head of yours?”

“I…I need some time to p-process…”

Shuri remained silent, her eyebrows knitting together as she observed you, appreciating the way you stumbled over your own words. She was captivated by you, by the way your body responded to her and to this newfound piece of information that you were trying to keep your composure over.

“I want you to go, Shuri.”

But she did not budge. Perched there, she observed you, and an increasing fear of her began to gnaw at you and Shuri seemed to sense this. She rose from her seat, advancing toward you, firmly placing her hands on the armrests of your chair as she hovered over you. Her lips were mere whispers away from yours, and the desire to both flee from and lean into her lips was a thin line in difference. You were torn between pushing her away and surrendering to the magnetic pull. Even though she had always held a certain dominance in your relationship, it was different now. It was hunter and hunted. Predator and prey. You felt so small, utterly defenseless, and you swallowed in anticipation, awaiting her next move.

“Shuri…please,” you choked out.

“What’s wrong, baby?”

“I—please don’t hurt me. Please.”

A soft chuckle escaped her lips, and though it wasn't inherently menacing, it sent shivers down your spine. Shuri leaned down, her lips almost brushing against the side of your throat, and your entire body quivered the closer she got.

“Please,” you said softly, unsure of what it was you were pleading for at this point. Did you want her to stop? Did you want her to keep going? There was a thin line between the two and the beat in your heart found its way between your legs and you could only hope she couldn’t sense that too. Shuri pressed her lips into your throat, kissing the sensitive skin as you sigh in relief. You tried so hard to contain the moan that was threatening to escape you but you swallowed it, clenching your thighs together instead. The feel of her soft lips against your throat was threatening to undo you and the sound of her voice nearly made you bring her face into yours.

“I would never hurt you,” she hums as her lips continue to softly assault your throat. A soft whimper escapes your lips, an unwilling beg for her to give you more and Shuri took note of it but did not give into it. She removes herself from your body, coming back to face you and your eyes that drown in both fear and want. She takes your cheek into the palm of her hand, pressing firm into your warm skin.

“If I leave now, are you going to be ok here on your own?”

You nod and she smirks at you, admiring how you and that smart mouth of your was at loss for words and how she was the one that got you that way.

“I’ll see you whenever you want to see me. Let me know and I’ll give you all the answers that you need. Just reach out to me, yeah?”

You nod again. She grabs your hand and helps you off the chair, pulling you in by your hips until your pelvis bumps into hers and suddenly all fear is replaced with pure lust and this was nothing new. You always had an attraction for Shuri, even when you were with Jonathan, you could never ignore how beautiful she was and how her beauty lit a spark in you and though there were never any official titles placed between the two of you, you always knew a part of her wanted you too.

“Shuri,” you groaned, completely overtaken by her and her presence.

“What is it?,” she asked, her voice winning you over with the bass it held. You swallow harshly, embarrassed with yourself and how much you were leaking onto your panties.

“I want…I n-need…”

“Tell me.”

You remained silent, hoping that the desperation in your expression would convey what words could not but that was not enough for Shuri. She let you go and your body immediately ached at the emptiness you felt. Then, she gently gripped your chin, tilting it slightly to ensure your gaze was locked onto hers.

“Call me when you’re ready.” Shuri heads towards the balcony door and opens it, and the coolness from outside immediately strikes your skin and you shiver.

“Shuri, what the fuck are you doing?? It’s raining and it’s damn cold, close the door!”

Shuri only smirked at you, scanning her surroundings before she effortlessly jumped off the balcony as if it was nothing. You immediately gasped, rushing to the edge to search for her, but she had vanished. All that remained was the sound of the pouring rain and the rustle of the wind in the air, clogging your senses and sending a sharp shiver up your spine. You had received the answer you sought, the one you needed, but now you were left with nothing but an insatiable craving to know more.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

A week had passed since that night with Shuri, a week of solitude spent grappling with troubled thoughts that ignited an overwhelming sense of desire. Finally, you summoned the courage to reach out and arrange another meeting with her. Shuri agreed, relieved that you were willing to take it up a notch.

“So what about mirrors?”

“What about mirrors?”

“You know…that dracula shit, how he can’t see his reflection and all…is that real?”

Shuri chuckles. “False. I can see my reflection perfectly fine.”

“Ok…uhhh, what about the whole thing with crosses, crucifixes, holy water and all that…?”

“False. Although I do not like being in the presence of those things, only because I find religion to be messy and I never really believed in it.”

You raise an eyebrow at her. “Okay, ummmm…what about garlic?”

Shuri burst into laughter. “You watch way too many movies, y/n.”

“Well shit, I don’t know. Pop culture got you guys all kinds of fucked up.”

“I know, it’s ok. I just…keep going,” she assures, coming back down from her laughter.

“Okay um…the sun.”

“You know the answer to that.”

“I know but I want to hear it come from your mouth, Shuri.”

“You must have heard enough lore to understand that we cannot go into the sun, princess. It is one of our greatest weaknesses. If I go in the sun, I’ll die. It’s simple really.”

A part of you went numb as the fragments and clues started to unravel and fit together before your eyes. Yet, you knew there was a crucial aspect of her you needed to confront, the elephant in the room that you were eager to discuss as soon as she disclosed her true nature as a vampire.

“W-what about your…your diet?,” you ask, already knowing the answer but afraid to hear it anyway. Shuri goes silent, as if she wants to keep the obvious all to herself.

“Shuri, baby…you said you would talk to me.”

“I know what I said.”

“So then talk to me. You’re the one that came into my life. You knew you would eventually have to have these conversations. So tell me.”

“They never last this long,” she replies, her eyes no longer on yours.

“What? Who never lasts this long?”

“What I am trying to say is, y/n…I’m tired of being alone. I’m tired of having this same conversation over and over and over again just for that person to run. No one has lasted this long.”

And that’s when it hits you. That’s when you remember that vampires are immortal beings. “Wait…how…how old are you?”

“I’m 26.”

“You know what the fuck I mean.”

A subtle tilt graced her lips as she smiled, exuding the same self-assured manner she always seemed to have.

“I was born in 1794, turned in the year 1820. And I’ve been this ever since,” she says so matter of factly. It startled you at first, leaving you trying to do the math in your head and Shuri notices right away.

“228.”

“What?”

“That’s the answer you are looking for.”

“Wait, how’d you…?? Wait…can you read minds??,” you ask startled, worried she may have heard all the dirty thoughts you’ve had about her. Shuri laughs.

“No, not necessarily. I don’t need to read your mind directly in order to know that is what you were thinking. Your body language says it all.”

You glare at her in confusion.

“I have been around long enough to understand what someone is trying to say or what they are thinking through their body language, princess. A skill humans think they have but I promise, you truly do not.”

“Uh huh…so you can’t read minds? Then what can you do? What kinds of powers or whatever do you have??”

“Powers??”

“Yeah or whatever the fuck its called!”

Shuri chuckles. “We don’t have ‘powers’. We have abilities. Take for example…the cheetah. The fastest land species…well not necessarily but you wouldn’t call its ability to run fast a power would you? Or the owls' capability to see at night? Is that a ‘power’ to you? How about the elephant's strength? A power? No. They are abilities that help them run from predators and catch their prey. It’s no different for a vampire. We have…capabilities that make it easy to catch our prey.”

You swallow hard, unsure of how to respond to the snarky yet intelligent way she put it.

“Throw that knife at me,” she commands, pointing to the knife you used to cut your steak.

“What??”

“Do it.”

“Shuri, I’m not gonna throw a knife at you, are you mad??”

“You cannot hurt me, y/n.”

You glanced around, surveying your surroundings and noting the nearly empty restaurant as the night advanced. Gradually, you picked up the knife, taking a deep breath before hurling it towards her. She effortlessly caught it in the palm of her hand, as if she had performed the act a million times before, the blade no more than an inch from her eyes. She then opened her hand, revealing the deep wound the knife had left from her grip and the blood that started to pool. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you observed her flesh healing at an inhumane speed. It was no different than the healing process for a human but sped up by 100 times.

“Whoaaaa,” you say, like a child seeing something extraordinary for the first time.

“I can also communicate to you telepathically,” she says, but her mouth did not move. It was as if she had placed her voice inside your mind and spoke to you that way.

“Wait…how’d you?? Do it again! That was cool!”

“I’ll leave it for another time,” she laughs. “I also have senses beyond the human capacity to even dream of. When I…turned…it was as if I was blind my whole life, like I was a deaf and could finally hear. My senses overwhelmed me, I swore I was going to die with everything that was raging through my body. I’m fast, strong, never get tired…I can talk about my ‘powers’ for a long time. But really…it loses its touch overtime. I often forget those abilities are there.”

At this moment, your jaw dropped in astonishment, completely enthralled with what truly existed and that it had been right in front of you all along.

“So you’re like…a superhero…with super cool powers and shit.”

Shuri's presence briefly darkened as a glint of emotion shimmered in her eye, a momentary pause that was so brief but felt long.

“Superhero,” she repeats. “No…nothing like that. Not anymore.” She mumbled that last part and it caught your attention but you chose to ignore it for the time being, steering back to the original point of conversation.

“Shuri…your diet.”

She looks away in shame, closing her eyes before she proceeds to answer. “I drink blood.”

“Ok…and what else?”

“That’s it. That’s all I eat. Human food tastes like nothing to me, it’s disgusting really. It does not give me any nutritional value either. The longer I go without drinking blood, the more I’ll start to feel it.”

You take a sharp gulp. “So how often do you feed on people?”

“Often…as much as I can.”

“D-do you…kill people?”

A brief pause ensues but Shuri's intense gaze stays fixed on you all the while, her jaw tensing before she continues.

“I have.”

Heat rushes through you. “Do you kill people often?”

“Not anymore.”

“...anymore?”

“Yeah, that’s what I said.”

You looked away, almost disgusted with the person you were sitting in front of.

“We don’t have to talk about this if you don’t want to, y/n.”

“No I…I want--I need to hear this. When…when was the last time you killed someone?”

Shuri refrained from speaking immediately, choosing to study and began to grow queasy.

“Not that long ago.”

“How long ago?? Did I know you??”

“Yeah.”

Another deafening silence engulfed the space between you two. There was no need to voice your next question; she already anticipated what you were going to ask.

“It was February 10…2022.”

Instantly, a sinking feeling gripped your stomach, and your heart felt like it might leap out of your chest as tears welled up, ready to surface.

“J-Jonathan?,” you whispered as you choked on your tears. She nodded her head, almost unbothered by the tears you were shedding for him.

“What…what the fuck is wrong with you??!”

“Y/n…”

“No! No, don’t fucking touch me!”

Despite the near emptiness of the diner, the few present all had eyes only looking at you before you stormed out with both confusion and hurt coursing through you. You climb into your car with determination before driving home, the desire to distance yourself from her was overpowering but when you got home, you were heavily startled to find her seated on your couch, indulging from your stash of whiskey.

“What are you doing here?? How’d you even get in here?!”

“Through the balcony.”

Your fractured sobs were on the verge of breaking free, and your tear-streaked cheeks were evidence of the intense breakdown you had in the car ride back home.

“You can’t just break into my house whenever you want to,” you managed to spit out.

“Can’t I?,” she challenged.

“Shuri…get the fuck outta my house. Get the fuck outta my house, I swear to god, Shuri…”

“I did you a favor, y/n.” The audacity she displayed left you stunned, as you pressed your temples in an attempt to ease the throb in your head from all the tears you cried.

“I never liked him. He never treated you the way you deserved and you just let him treat you that way. I was so sick of seeing you cry, y/n. Is that the life you really wanted for yourself? I mean, let’s be honest. You’re more than happy he’s gone. Now there’s nothing in the way of going after what you really want, seeking for the life you deserve, princess. I did it for you.”

“I--wow. You are mentally insane. What is that, some kinda romantic vampire notion??”

“It can be,” she responded, and you struggled to discern if she was being sarcastic. Nothing could be certain when she wore that enigmatic grin on her face.

“None of that was for you to decide, Shuri! You can’t just go around killing people and for what?? Cuz you don’t like them? That’s a life…a human life you just took away…”

“I’ve decided a long time ago to not care too much for human life anymore. There is no point and it does nothing for me.”

“I…what? Ok…yeah…Imma need you to get the fuck outta my house…like…now.”

Shuri rises from her seat, advancing towards you, and soon you're caught between the wall and her imposing presence once more. Your breath hastens, and the hairs on your arm stand on end as she takes you in. Shuri takes pleasure in the way your body reacts to her, attempting to decipher just how frightened you truly are. You swallow nervously.

“What are you scared of, princess?,” she asks with low lids, her eyes glazed with desire.

“Y-you.”

She lets out a soft chuckle as she fakes a frown, almost mocking your fear.

“Why?” Gently, she runs her fingers across your cheek as she speaks softly, a sly smile appearing on her face while she observes your pleading eyes locked onto hers. “Tell me why I scare you, baby.”

“You kill people, Shuri.”

Shuri nods, humming in agreement.

“You could kill me.”

“I could…but I won’t. You know why? Cuz I care for you…I care for you and it scares the absolute shit outta me.” She utters these words with a hint of sorrow in her eyes, as if a fracture lies beneath the confident facade she typically displays when you're around. Strangely, this vulnerability lessens your fear. You reach out and touch her face, gently placing your palm against her cheek, and she leans into your touch.

“Do you care about me?,” she asks, her voice coming to soothe you.

“Hmm?”

“Do you care about me, y/n? Tell me, please. I need to know.”

In an instant, any remnants of warmth and comfort vanish, swiftly replaced by a surge of anger within you.

“Shuri, how the fuck are you even asking me this right now? Do I care about you?? You killed Jonathan!”

“Yeah, and he tasted fucking delicious,” she snarked back. At that moment, you no longer cared about holding back the tears you had struggled so hard to keep in check in front of her. It felt futile.

“Are you…? Shuri, I beg, fuck outta my house…like right now!”

“Do you really want me to go though?”

You did, you wanted her out of your face but there was a part of you that wanted her to stay and learn more, though you decided to push it to the farthest corner of your mind for now.

“If I remember correctly, you told me you were relieved that he was gone.”

“That doesn’t make it ok,” you spat. Shuri sits back down, manspreading on the couch and she looks ridiculously delicious. How pathetic of you to find the attractiveness in her even in the midst of the anger she fueled through you. She tells you to come sit beside her but you opt for the couch in front of her instead and she chuckles at you.

“I just…you can’t be mad at me for reacting the way I am.”

“Who said I was mad?”

You took a brief pause, granting yourself a moment of composure as you regulate your breathing and wiped away your tears. Shuri sensed the warmth emanating from your body and tuned into the steadier rhythm of your heartbeat before she proceeds.

“I just have one question for you, is that ok?”

You nod.

“Are you relieved because of who he was? Or are you relieved you no longer have an obstacle that is getting in the way of going after what you really want?”

“W-what?”

“Don’t play stupid.”

“I-I don’t--”

But you were cut off by the swiftness of her body approaching you and it startled you. She was in front of you in less than a second, her figure was nothing but a blur as she ran to you, traveling at the speed of light.

“How did you--” and once again Shuri hushed you with the raise of her finger.

“You ask me about honesty, telling me to come clean to you and all I’m asking is the same from you. I need your honesty as well. And maybe you won’t give it to me today and that’s ok because if there is one thing I have in this life of mine, it’s time. But I need you to relax, just breathe. I know there’s a lot more swimming in that mind of yours and I am willing to clear it for you if you let me.”

You finally allow yourself a moment of calm, inhaling deeply numerous times as your mind relaxed into her even just for a brief moment. She made it so hard to stay mad at her, even for something as viscous as the things she did, she always, always knew her way around you. The two of you sat back down, eagerly waiting to see who would break the silence. You had a multitude of questions to pose, but for now, you chose this one.

“So are you like…dead?”

A soft smile appears on her face. “I prefer the term undead but yes, I died so technically that makes me dead.”

“You died,” you repeat her words to yourself and Shuri nods and there is most definitely a hint of sadness in her eyes.

“How?”

Her manner transforms, her brows knitting together as she adopts a more rigid seating posture. “It just happened, I guess.”

Confusion sets in. Why would she permit you to ask all the questions you need, only to respond on her own terms?

“Shuri, your hostility is really starting to piss me off.”

She pauses, her face tainted with frustration.

“You said I could ask anything and you would tell me.”

“No, I said I’d tell you anything you need to know.”

“And I don’t need to know this??”

“No, you really don’t.”

“So one minute you're telling me I can ask all the questions I want but when I overstep your boundaries, you back away. Uh uh, that’s not how we’re doing this. I ask. You answer. Or I’m not doing this, Shuri.”

“This? And what exactly would this be, y/n?”

“That’s not my point.”

“Then what is your point?? Don’t I deserve answers too?? Don’t try to play stupid with me, y/n. It may have worked for him but that shit does not work for me.”

A brief interlude of silence engulfed the space, one that almost broke you but Shuri continued to speak.

“I’ll just leave you be for now because you clearly have a lot of thinking to do as well.”

Once more, she leaves you, leaves you with just enough to drive you mad.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

2 weeks pass by and you have not seen or spoken to her since that day but your thoughts have been consumed by her non-stop. You took the time to do your own research, trying to find things out for yourself but you were met with even more questions by the end of it. You continuously pull your phone out, wanting to meet with her again, but everytime you gather up the courage to type the message, fear would make you delete it.

You prepare for bed, doing your usual night time routine and when you turn around to go to your bedroom, she is standing right behind and it scares you out of your mind.

“Shuri, what the actual fuck??? You scared the living shit outta me!!”

Shuri laughs lightly, finding amusement in your pissed off state.

“That shit ain’t funny, you almost gave me a heart attack. Quit doing that.”

“I don’t know, your reaction is kind of funny.”

“Shuri!!”

“Fine, fine. I’m sorry. It’s just…you never called, I was beginning to worry.”

“There’s no need to worry, I’m perfectly fine. Plus these things go two ways. Haven’t heard from you either.” Your torn is harsh and short tempered.

“Are you still angry with me?”

“Yes.”

“What did I do now?”

“Are you here to tell me what I want to know?”

“Yes and no.”

“I don’t know what that means”

“You will.”

You maintain silence, growing weary of her ongoing games. You walk right past her, rolling your eyes in frustration as you head toward your bedroom, and she trails behind, following you inside.

“If you’re not gonna tell me anything, you can go,” you say as you plop into your bed.

“Actually, I was thinking I could stay the night,” she remarks, casually taking a seat on the bed beside you and getting comfortable. The idea triggered a mix of unease and excitement. Having Shuri in the same bed as you opened the door to countless fantasies your mind could explore, but it also carried the potential for things to become…ugly.

“What? I’m not going to eat you,” she quips, reading your unease and responding in a playful manner. You clench your teeth, attempting to conceal the subtle fear creeping in because even though you know she was simply toying with you, it raises another question: did she have an appetite for your blood?

“I’m serious, y/n. You know that right? I won’t hurt you.”

You pondered it in silence a bit longer before responding to her.

“Fine…but stay on your side of the bed and don’t even think of trying anything,” you remark with attitude and Shuri, per usual, only laughs at you.

“Whatever you say,” she replies with her hands in the air. You roll your eyes in aggression before shifting in your bed, making yourself comfortable as you endeavor to drift off to sleep, lulled by the sound of your own breath and the absence of hers. Your heart races for a while until it finally settles into a deep slumber, a sleep in which you experience the most vivid dream in your entire life.

➳ the dream:

You wake up to the sound of unsettling echoes of a distant battleground, the anguished cries of people you loved and cared for pierced your ears. You had never felt so much fear in your life, disoriented and overwhelmed by your grim surroundings. You never felt so willing to help and use your Bast-given powers that had been passed on to you ever since your brother entered the ancestral plane but it was when you attempted to get up that you realized you were deeply wounded and you could barely move, the healing effects of the heart-shaped herb becoming slow. You were overcome by an excruciating physical agony, you struggle and weep, the most horrific pain you've ever known taking over you. Amidst this suffering, a distant cry reaches your ears, nearly snuffing out your last breath.

“YINTOMBI YAM!!” (“SHE’S MY DAUGHTER!!”)

“Akayi kuphumelela, kumkanikazi wam! Ukuba uyahamba, siya kufa sonke! Uya kufa!” (“She won’t make it, my queen! If you go, we will all die! You will die!”)

“Hayi, hayi intombi yam! Hayi Shuri yam!! Bast ndicela ungamthathi uShuri wam! Sele uno T'challa, hayi uShuri wam, nceda !! NDIYACELA!!" (“No, not my daughter! Not my Shuri!! Bast please don’t take my Shuri! You already have T’challa, not my Shuri, please!! PLEASE!!”)

The cries were violent, compelling you to move toward them, yet your feeble body refused. Your heart raced, the blood pulsing through your veins as if in a rush, leaving you breathless, and the world seemed to constrict around you under the scorching rays of the sun. The warmth enveloped you, vibrant and teeming with life, a stark contrast to the disturbing sounds that surrounded you.

“Uya kuba kunye nezinyanya, uKumkanikazi uRamonda. Uzakuba noT’Challa.” (“She will be with the ancestors, Queen Ramonda. She will be with T’Challa.”)

"Hayi hayi!!” (“No…NO!!”)

The echoes of agonizing cries gradually diminished until they were nothing, your vision faltering as breathing became a struggle, your body shutting down faster than the healing effects of the heart-shaped herb could manage. Your life was slipping away, breath fleeing your lungs, and you made the decision to embrace it as you faded into a state of nothingness and you saw the ancestral plane for a small moment, its beautiful sky right within your grasp until you suddenly awoke with a sharp inhale and a vicious cough.

You were greeted by the serene night sky, accompanied only by the chirping of crickets and you were startled once you noticed a woman seated before you, her face unfamiliar and her accent foreign to your ears.

“Who—who are you??,” you asked, but she did not answer. “How did you get into Wakanda?”

You adjusted your body to stand, surprised that you were completely healed with no sign of injury or pain. “Did you do this?? Heal me??”

Again, you were met with silence until finally she spoke with a grin. “Something like that,” she quipped, teasing you as she sat man spread on the log below her. The treescape surrounded you, the darkness overwhelmed you and you should be cold but you weren’t.

“How did you do it?? What kind of science is this??!!”

But the woman merely chuckled, finding amusement in your perplexed state and the endless questions you directed at her. "Science," she reiterated, almost tauntingly.

“Who are you??,” you asked once more, this time with more demand but still, she gave you nothing. “I-I have to go back to the palace. I have to see my mom, she thinks I’m dead! I heard her cries!”

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

“You won’t even tell me who you are! Why should I listen to you??”

She shifted her posture, and under the moon's gentle glow, you noticed an unusual quality about her. Her face, though seemingly perfect, bore eyes that were anything but human; glassy, with a hue of blood-red. This sight filled you with fear, urging you to flee, racing into the forest in a desperate bid to reach the safety of the palace and escape the woman who instilled such terror in you.

As you ran, you began to realize how you moved much faster than ever before. Your senses heightened, capturing details and sounds that were previously beyond your perception. The overwhelming influx of sensations left you both stunned and astonished. The world appeared silent, yet it roared with sound. Every rustle, every detail in the darkness of the forest was vividly clear to you.

You pinpointed this experience to the heart-shaped herb, pondering the potential existence of Bast. Could this be a miraculous gift from the ancient power? But when you got to the palace, that was when you would learn, learn it had nothing to do with the herb or Bast. You climbed the towering walls, reaching your mother's bedroom window, opening it cautiously to avoid startling her but your unexpected appearance had the opposite effect. Fear flashed in her eyes and she wanted to scream but she didn’t.

“Unyanisile ntombam?? Usisiporho??" (“Are you real, my daughter?? Are you a ghost??”)

“Hayi mama, ndim! Ndiyaphila! Ndilungile! Andifanga…” (“No mother, it’s me! I’m alive! I’m ok! I didn’t die…”)

“Kodwa…sikubonile. Ubumkile...njani-” (“But…we saw you. You were practically gone...how-”)

“Kulungile mama, Bast undigcinile! Wandomeleza, wandomeleza, ukuze ndoyise iintshaba zethu. Ndiphilile, mama." (“It’s ok mother, Bast saved me! And he made me powerful and strong so I can overcome our enemies! I’m ok, mother.”)

Your mom was taken aback, startled by the way you so openly claimed that Bast saved you when you never believed in such spiritual things before but she did not question you. Her overwhelming emotion was simply relief that you were alive. Your mom was sobbing, tears streaming down her face uncontrollably as she embraced you, holding you as if it were her last moment and you welcomed her in, finding solace in her warmth and familiar scent as you nestled your nose against her neck..and that is when you heard it.

A distinctive rhythm that captured your attention, the steady thump of her heartbeat, so pronounced that it drowned out any other ambient sound. The pulsating rush of blood through her veins accompanied it and it brought you a feeling that was so unclear yet simple at the same exact time. You struggled to comprehend what you were feeling, but the more you resisted, the harder it became to contain. A fiery sensation engulfed your body, saliva pooling in your mouth beyond your control, an overpowering urge rising within you, craving her life source more than you craved anything else before.

“U…uyayiphunga?,” (“Do…do you smell that?,”) you asked, your face still buried into your mothers neck.

“Unuka ntoni?” (“Smell what?”)

"Ndiya yidinga." (“I need it.”)

“Ufuna ntoni, ntombi yam?” (“Need what, my daughter?”)

“Momma…”

"Yintoni, Shuri??" (“What is it, Shuri??”)

You held her so tight, you felt like you could break her and your mother screamed in pain as she felt a crack in her ribs. You were breaking her.

"Umama?? Mama ndiyaxolisa...ndiyaxolisa kakhulu," (“Mother?? Mother I’m so…I’m so sorry,”) you choked out in a state of terror, the sound of her ribs cracking haunted your ears as you held her. Tears brimmed to your eyes as you struggled to let her go, your eyes burned with a wicked venom as your thirst gnawed at your whole body and took away any sense of rational thinking. And suddenly she was gone, no longer in your arms as you looked at the mirror in front of you and saw Shuri’s reflection staring back at you, her mouth covered in blood.

Abruptly, the scene changed and it was no longer your mother in your arms but another woman. She was beautiful. She had deep, dark eyes and skin to match. Her hair was as thick as a lush forest, full of vitality and texture. Her lips are as full as ripened fruit, tempting and inviting.

“What are you waiting for, Shuri?,” she said to you, her voice breaking through your psyche in such a calm, inviting way and you wanted her. Wanted her to be yours forever.

“I want to be with you. Forever. Turn me.”

A surge of guilt briefly tugged at your emotions but that was quickly overridden by an intense longing to be with her until the end of time, an overwhelming love that you had never thought was humanly possible and probably because it was not humanly possible to feel as deeply as a vampire feels.

“I want you to do it, Shuri. Turn me. Please. I want this.” Her dark brown eyes shimmered with a blend of desperation and love and you were so scared. So scared to cross your boundaries once again but the thought of not being with her forever scared you even more.

"Please," she pleaded one final time before you pressed your lips to hers, savoring the warmth of her human essence before trailing down to her throat, delicately grazing your mouth across her tender skin and her pulse whispered against your lips. Opening your mouth, you descended, piercing her veins with your teeth and you moaned as her life source flowed into your mouth, embracing the flavor you desperately needed. And you did this until everything dissolved into an abyss, an engulfing darkness that consumed you until finally, you woke up. And you were you.

You woke up with a commotion of feelings; you were confused, hurt, and scared. Glancing to the side, you found an empty bed, leaving you to wonder if Shuri had even visited your place last night or if it was all part of a dream.

The day unfolded, besieged by thoughts you struggled to push away. No matter how hard you fought, your dream clung to your mind, refusing to dissipate. As night descended, Shuri arrived along with it, standing on your balcony and for the first time, she knocked.

“Shuri?”

“Nkosazana.” The sudden language change throws you off as you step aside to let her in. She has food in her hand, no doubt for you of course.

“Shuri…what language is that?,” you ask with the most curiosity you have ever had so far.

“Xhosa,” she replies without so much as looking at you, emptying the bag of food as she assembles it on your dining table.

“Is that your native language?”

“You never noticed the accent?,” she responds, still not looking at you.

“No, of course I noticed the accent but…Shuri…where are you from?”

Shuri pauses, her entire body freezing momentarily before she resumes.

“Are you Wakandan?”

“So you know about Wakanda?”

“Of course I know about Wakanda. I couldn’t escape it not too long ago, it was all over the news and everything. The world’s most powerful and technologically advanced. A secret hidden in Africa. Home to the…Black…Panther,” your voice trailed off towards the end as you suddenly remembered the reflection staring back at you in your dream. The reflection of Shuri with blood on her lips wearing what you now recognize to be a Black Panther suit.

“Shuri, I need you to tell me something.”

She looks at you for a split second but says nothing.

“Were you…were you the Black Panther?”

Once more, she remains silent, almost entirely disregarding you as she finishes preparing the food. You stand there, observing with genuine admiration. On any other day, her tendency to ignore you would drive you up the wall, your lips ready to hurl curses and demand answers, but this time, you allow her the moments she needs to compose herself. You saw her in a whole new light and you sympathize with her.

Shuri pulls out a chair, signaling for you to sit, and you comply without zero fight on your end as she takes a seat across from you. You bite your inner cheek, plagued with even more questions than you had before.

“You can talk now,” she said, breaking the silence. You took a bite of your food, before proceeding with your abundance of questions.

“What happened last night? What was that??”

“I little trick I like to call ‘dream manipulation.’”

“So you were in my head?”

She nods.

“You made me see…your past?”

Another nod.

“But it’s not like I was watching you. It was as if I was you. I could see, hear, and feel everything you felt as if it was my own. I felt everything.”

Shuri sits there and remains in an unbothered state, only waiting to hear what else you had to say.

“So you were the Black Panther then? A long time ago…or whatever.”

“Mhmmm.”

“What happened?”

“You saw what happened.”

“I know but…I want to hear it from your mouth! A lot happened and I need answers, Shuri! Enough with this unbothered facade you got going on here and fuck you! Answer me!”

Shuri’s nostrils flare as you push her temper, but she quickly swallows it down as she comes to realize that you have every right to be upset.

“I’m sorry,” you apologized for your outburst.

“Don’t be. You have a right to know. It’s just…my brother, T’Challa was the Black Panther up until his life was taken from him and the mantle was passed down to me and then I became the Black Panther. We had enemies, enemies that wanted our resources and our vibranium…stories that are still happening today. I was seriously injured one day in combat, so injured that my loved ones left me for dead. And then I met her. I still don’t know who she is but I know what she was. A monster who turned me into this. Thinking she gave me a second chance at life when she should’ve just let me die so I could be reunited with my brother.” Her voice sounded shattered, burdened with hurt and remorse, and your instinct was to comfort her, to alleviate her pain. But as a feeble human, what could you possibly offer to ease her suffering?

“I never saw her again, the woman that turned me. My maker.” She said that last part with nothing but disgust. “And I hated her…for a long fucking time. I still do. I had to learn to fend for myself, had to teach myself to control my thirst and survive in this human world on my own. It’s been such a long and lonely journey. And everybody leaves. Everybody.”

You sat there, your ears and heart open to her as she fought the tears that loomed on the brink of falling. You so badly wanted to jump into her arms and cradle her, promise her everything was going to be ok but those were not your promises to make. There was nothing you could give her and you felt so small and helpless.

“Shuri…I’m so sorry.”

“It’s ok. It’s not your fault. I just…it has been years since I have said that out loud.”

A faint smile touched your lips as you extended your hand towards her. Despite harboring more questions and unresolved moments, you decided to set them aside, at least for the moment. Shuri reciprocated, reaching out and delicately taking hold of your hand, pressing it to her lips in a desperate gesture as she kissed your skin.

“I want to take you somewhere,” she says.

“And where would that be?”

“It’s a surprise.”

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

You are in your car, but Shuri is at the wheel, navigating deeper into the dense forest. It's dark and somewhat intimidating, and you begin to wonder how Shuri is driving without headlights down the quiet road, until you recall her mention of her incredible eyesight. Finally, after what feels like an hour, Shuri steers into an extremely secluded area. The quietness is disrupted as you hear something other than the chorus of crickets; a gentle sound of water and soft waves. It's a vast lake, so expansive that it could easily be mistaken for an ocean from your perspective.

Shuri opens the car door and extends her hand, and this time, you accept her gesture. Leading you to the lake's edge, the moon was so big and bright, casting a luminous glow upon the night sky and the surrounding stars. The scene is breathtakingly beautiful and grand, the most picture perfect setting for a perfect moment with the person you wanted to be around the most.

“It’s beautiful as fuck out here,” you commented.

“This is where I live. You see that house hiding behind us? That’s my place. It’s where I come every morning and hide away. It’s where I come to just be…free. Free from this world and be who I was made to be.”

“So you do actually have a home? No coffin??,” you joked and she lightly laughed with you.

“So what else can you do? Show me. There’s no one around us, I want to see you being you.”

Shuri raised an eyebrow. “What is it you want me to do?”

“When I was…you…in my dream, you gave me a taste of what it felt like to have your body. When you ran through the forest that night to go back to your mom, I felt your strength, your speed, all that stuff. I want to see it. Show me the cool side of vampirism.”

Shuri tilted her head in contemplation, a pensive smile appeared on her face as she pondered the idea. Typically, she engaged in these activities alone, leaping through the trees, melding with the forest, maneuvering in ways the human body couldn't fathom.

"Fine then," she says, rising swiftly before running towards the trees at an astonishing speed. As she reaches the trees, the reality is beyond your imagination. Her body effortlessly launches onto a branch, beginning a mesmerizing journey from tree to tree, flipping and diving in ways that leaves you smiling in complete and absolute awe. It appears as if she's floating, moving with such speed that gravity seems to chase her, almost a blur in motion. You had never seen someone look so…free. And as she comes back down to meet you, moving faster than your eyes can track, there's no sign of fatigue or weariness. It's the most alive you had ever seen her.

“That was…wow,” you say in complete shock and Shuri laughs at you.

“It’s pretty neat, I guess,” she replies with a smug grin and it makes your stomach tingle. Shuri sits in the sand near the lake and you follow her.

“Do you like being one?”

“Hmmm?”

“A vampire…do you like being one?”

“Sometimes.”

“What’s your favorite thing about it??”

Shuri chuckles, dipping her head between the arms she has perched on her hiked up knees. “I like being able to manipulate people’s dreams,” she replies, shocking you with her answer. “I don’t sleep so it’s the only way I can dream, I guess.”

“No sleep??”

She shakes her head.

“What about your least favorite thing?”

Shuri goes quiet before answering, pondering the many ways she could answer this question.

“The blood lust. Being frozen. Watching the world change but staying the same.” She says this while looking out at the lake, taking her bottom lip into her mouth.

“Do you think you’re a bad person, Shuri?”

Shuri looked at you, eyes scanning your genuinely curious face before she proceeds. “I’m not sure. It’s not so black and white. It’s this weird thing, like…vampires emotionally feel so deeply but we were cursed with the primal instinct to hunt, feed, and kill. It’s like…with humans…when you guys get hungry, you simply go make yourself a sandwich or something, right? Fix yourself a quick meal. With vampires, it does not matter what we feel…that feeling always becomes hunger. If I’m angry, I want to eat someone. If I’m sad, I want to go eat someone. Horny? Eat someone,” she chuckles. “And then you’re left with nothing but an overwhelming guilt. It’s exhausting. Humbling, in a way, to say the least.”

You swallow, utterly captivated by her and every word she has to give you. This version of Shuri is vastly different from the person you've known over the past year. Seeing her in all her openness and vulnerability makes you realize that you never really knew her and it's only been in these recent days that you've felt so deeply connected to someone in a way you've never experienced before. You could sit here and ask her question after question after question, but there were a few that burned at your heart and it hurt you to ask, but she placed the questions there with the dream she fed you last night.

“Shuri…may I ask you something else?”

“It’s all you’ve been doing, princess. What’s to stop you now?”

“Well…I was wondering if you could tell me what happened to your mom.”

Shuri hung her head low, trying to get lost in the grains of sand and the mere sight of her made you regret your question but once she let out a hefty sigh, you knew it would be ok.

“I went back to the palace that night…the night my life was taken from me and to this day, it was the biggest mistake I had ever made. I thought my senses were some kind of spiritual doing from the heart-shaped herb, that Bast had given me a second chance, how foolish of me!” She buries her head into her hands and you lean forward, not sure what to do but let her have this moment of mourning.

“She thought I was a ghost at first, that I was reaching her from the ancestral plane, claiming that she had watched me die and she most definitely did but I did not know that…yet. She held me in her arms and I did the same and it was at that moment I knew something was off. Her heartbeat was so loud…like a drum pounding in my ears and it overtook me. My throat burned and I could smell her blood and I had never wanted anything more in my life. I wanted it so bad and it scared me. And I made sure that…that I would have it…” She choked on her tears, sobbing into her forearm and you kneeled forward to bring her head into your chest.

“I was brand new, y/n. It was damn near impossible for me to control it. And with no maker to rely on, no counseling or guidance, I was ruthless. An infant vampire and the taste of her blood was the most…feeling that for the first time, it surpasses any human experience. And it disgusts me to say it but I am being honest.”

She sobs in your arms, accepting your embrace as she feels comfort for the first time in years. The feeling was so foreign to her, to feel loved and accepted for who she was, despite acknowledging that she was the monster she believed she was.

“You didn’t know any better, Shuri. You can’t blame yourself for being thrown into this against your will and not knowing how to cope with it. It’s not your fault, baby,” you cooed, lulling her into your warmth as you comforted her.

“That’s what I thought at first, what I told myself for years. But that was my mother, y/n. My flesh and blood. You would think a daughter's love would surpass anything but that just goes to show how strong the thirst for blood is, especially in the beginning. No human equivalent. And it haunts me to this day.”

“Shuri—“

“I left Wakanda, for good, after that. Left them without a protector, without a ruler…I don’t know how they managed to pick themselves up after that but clearly they did. And I’ve never been back. I would love to…go back, one day. But I can’t. Not with the reminders it would bring.”

She lets out a few more soft sobs before she proceeds. “But hey, I managed to make it on my own. No maker, no guidance. I was ruthless in the beginning. Most vampires are.”

You feigned a smile, one that was just for her. “And what about the girl in my dream? Who was she?”

“That was…she was a dear friend of mine. Someone I loved. Someone I cared for.” A tear falls down her and washes into the fabric of your shirt. “But it does not matter anymore. She’s gone now.”

“What happened to her?”

“What happens to all humans, I suppose. She died. Never got close to a human after that. I tried…many times but they would all run eventually and understandably so. You are my first--the first person who has stayed with me. It scares me, really.”

Shuri gets up, coming face to face with your own tear-stained cheeks as she gently wipes them away with her thumb and you let out a soft smile.

“Soooo…no fangs? No cool eyes? Aren’t vampires supposed to look cool?,” you joke half-heartedly in attempts to lighten up the mood and put Shuri’s aching heart at ease and it seems to work because Shuri lets out a beautiful laugh, that laugh that you have loved for a long time.

“Would you prefer I walked around with red eyes and fangs??”

“I don’t know, you’d look kinda hot,” you half joke and she glares at you in both confusion and admiration.

“Walking around like a twilight vampire,” you tease and she makes a face of disgust. “Heyyy, don’t do Twilight like that. They’re good movies.”

“Fuck that,” she laughs and you laugh along with her.

“You’re really beautiful, Shuri,” you say, leaving Shuri in a subtle shock.

“Where did that come from?”

“I’m not blind. I may have been with someone our entire friendship but I always saw you and you were always beautiful to me.”

“Oh, so now you’re being honest with me? After you had me begging like a fool,” she teased.

“I’ve always loved you Shuri, you know that. You just wanted to hear me say it.”

Shuri chuckles. “Love…what a strong word, thrown around like it weighs nothing.”

“No but I do love you, I’m not playing. I love this version of you. The version of you where I actually know you. Where you let your guard down and just be…you. I love you.”

Shuri sighs, basking it all in. It’s been so long since she’s heard those words and it scares her.

”I wanna try something, if you’ll let me.”

“Anything,” your words rushed out with a tinge of desperation, revealing more than intended, driven by an urgent longing. You craved her, yearned for her presence. Her gaze locked onto yours, her eyes mirroring the same desire, as she tenderly traced your cheek. Finally, she leaned in, her lips meeting yours, and in that moment, you both embraced each other as if it were the last breath you'd take. The kiss ignited swiftly, your breaths turning erratic as you struggled to match her fervent passion. Gradually, she lifted you, and you instinctively wrapped your legs around her, never wanting to break away. She carries you across the small beach, bringing you into her house and not once did you two disconnect your reckless lips. The kiss itself spoke volumes, telling a story of how much you two yearned for one another, conveying unspoken feelings that had resided within long before you ever knew of Shuri’s true vampire nature. The heat between your legs began to rise, becoming warmer and wetter as you felt your clit brush against Shuri’s lower abdomen and that minimal friction alone felt like it was going to be the death of you. Shuri feels what you are trying to do and she grabs your ass in response, helping you feel more as she pushes you into her and it causes you to moan into the kiss.

“Mmm,” you moan, a sound that drove Shuri mad.

“That was fucking sexy,” she remarks and you cannot help but feel a tang of embarrassment for the lust you had for her. Jonathan was never one to tell you how sexy you were to make you feel desired, but instead to feed into his own ego of having you underneath him.

Shuri sits on the couch as you situate yourself on top of her, your crotch above hers, still kissing in pure intensity as the spark between you both transforms into an uncontrollable flame. Your lips were so swollen and sore, but it's inconsequential in the face of everything else. In that moment, nothing exists except Shuri, and your determination to be with her is unwavering. Shuri's kisses leave your lips, shifting towards your jaw and down to your throat as you struggle to hold in the moans that threaten to spill over, your heart beat intensifying. Shuri grasps your ass once more as you begin to grind, your actions portraying sheer desperation as you chase the friction that Shuri’s body gives yours. Shuri's hands reach for hips, guiding your movements and you squirm under the weight of her direct kisses upon your throat. Your heart thumps erratically, syncing with the pounding in your pussy and you are drenched.

“Shuri…please,” you whined, as she bruised and marked your tender throat. “I need you, please.”

Your desperate plea drives Shuri insane, hearing your voice in its deepest sensual urgency was enough to make her take you right there and then.

“You have made me wait way too long to have you like this, s’thandwa. I hope to fuck you at least half as long.”

Shuri lifts the hem of your skirt before her hand finally finds her way to that spot she needed for so long and she groans at how much you are soaking through the material of your thin panties.

“Bast, baby. You’re soaking wet,” she murmurs softly, and you nestle your face into the arc of her neck, concealing both the embarrassment and the warmth that rushes to your cheeks. But she assures her baby girl that there's nothing to be ashamed of, affirming that she had always sensed when your pussy longed for her.

“It’s ok, baby. I love seeing you like this. Let me see you.” Her voice was so smooth and sensual, a velvety depth mixed with a husky rasp that made your head spin as she stroked you though those thin panties, pressing the fabric between your folds as she taunted your throbbing clit. Your whimpers were small and short-breathed as you came back up to face her, your hopeless expression coming to meet a face that was ready to tear you apart.

“I could always tell when you were turned on, nkoszana. I could always smell when this little pussy needed me, so there’s no need to shy away now, do you understand me?”

And you’re nodding your head fervently, almost absentmindedly as you struggle to truly grasp your surroundings with Shuri’s long fingers playing between your dewy folds.

“Want to watch you cum in these little panties of yours.”

“Unh.”

“Yeah, that’s it baby. Look at you. You’re so fucking pretty like this.”

“Shuri…unh…pl-please.”

“Did he make you cum?”

“Mmmm…huh?”

Shuri chuckled in a cocky manner, a self-satisfied sound that rolled off her tongue as she felt a sense of superiority over you and your body.

“Jonathan? Was that his name? Did he ever make you cum?”

You can hardly even think with the way she was touching you, her firm fingers deliberately swiping at your clothed clit.

“S-sometimes,” you managed to say and that much was true. Sometimes he would make you cum, not because he was taking the time to learn and understand your body but usually it happened as a result of him chasing his own high. A lot of the time you would not even finish and he did not even care to make sure you did.

“Only sometimes?,” she teases, a deliberate tactic to understand how to handle you while also reveling in the sight of your mouth faltering and stumbling.

“F-fuck h-him. Unh…fuck.”

“Hmm?”

“Fuck J-Jonathan. I’m glad he’s g-gone. Oh.”

Shuri smiles at you, an arrogant grin as she basked in the mess you were as she toyed with you. Shuri’s fingers pick up the pace, pressing firmer into your clit and the waves of your orgasm begin to crest through, approaching in silence as your firmly gripped Shuri’s shoulders. Your hips are bucking into her as your pussy drools through the fabric, leaking directly onto Shuri’s fingers and the sounds coming out of you are too far gone for your control.

“Shuri, Shuri…yeah! Unh!”

“Cum, y/n. I want to see you fall apart from my fingers.”

“Mhm.”

Your orgasm quietly emerges, a slow, measured sequence that pulsates through your pussy walls as you surrender entirely, collapsing into Shuri’s arms as you ride the waves of your high. And Shuri talks you through it, whispering assurances of love and telling her girl how pretty she looks as her greedy pussy soaks all over her fingers and slutty panties, caressing your clit through the lingering aftershocks as you grapple with the descent from your gradual climax. Overwhelmed, you clutch her wrist, the struggle evident in your lungs as they battle to regulate your breathing, your mind lost in a haze.

“Shuri...I…fuck, baby.”

“You’re so messy,” she remarked with a smirk, hooking those dangerous fingers underneath the fabric of those panties that hugged your waist, tugging until the thin material pressed into your clit and you moaned at the sensitivity. She brings her fingers down and pulls them to the side, your slick sticking to the fabric and Shuri’s eyes flood with lust and desire, burning with a deep hunger that surpasses the blood that lives in your veins. She craves you in every single way. She brings her lips to yours, her eyebrows scrunched together as she ripped the panties off of you and you gasp, finally free of the thin line that was keeping you from Shuri’s skin and she lifts you up once again, taking you into her kitchen as she roughly knocks away anything in her way and places you down on the cold marble countertop. Shuri lets go of the kiss, crossing her arms as she removes her top, coming face to face with her defined abdomen and lean arms.

“Open your legs, y/n. Let me see her.”

You oblige, opening your thick, brown thighs and your pussy glistened before her. There were strings of cum that stuck to your inner thighs as your slick refused to detach from your pussy, creating a web of your arousal and the look on Shuri’s face sent shivers down your spine.

“Fuck, I have to taste her.”

“Then do it. Let me use your mouth.” You were still so delicate and sore from Shuri’s overwhelming touch but you desired more. “Let me fuck your face.”

Shuri got on her knees, bending before the melanated goddess before her as she wrapped her arms around your thighs, resting the back of your knees on her shoulders as she spread you open, coming face to face with the mess she created. You look down at her, admiring the way her arm muscles flex as she wrapped them around your thighs, watching the way your cream stuck to the side curls on her head as she dove into your ocean, wrapping her lips around your swollen clit and you arched your back at the sensation.

“Oh fuck…yes, Shuri, YES! Just like that, baby.”

Her mouth and tongue played with your clit, fucking in and around you in an overwhelming harmony that had you grinding into her face and she allowed it, allowed you to use her face as a means to please yourself. She moaned into your clenching cunt, finding the taste of you being better than she had ever imagined and her fingers pressed into the flesh of your thighs, sure to leave an imprint the following day.

“Unh, unh, unh, oohhh. Yeah.”

She could tell you were getting close, the way your thrusts into her face became more aggressive, the way your pussy continuously got wetter by the moment, and the louder your moans were getting, it was all telling of your impending climax. But she tells you to hold it in, keep it in longer so she can play with you more, feel your pussy clench around her tongue for a few more moments as she watches your clit grow larger with each slurp.

“I c-can’t, baby. Please. I'm gonna cum.”

“Not yet.”

“B-but—”

And your pussy is met with a sharp slap of Shuri’s hand that makes you yelp.

“I said not yet. Understand?”

And you nod your head frantically, your knuckles losing its color as you clutch to the ends of the marble countertop.

“Good girl.”

And Shuri dives back into you, consuming your essence as if she was ignoring your whimpers of overstimulation above her but she heard you, and she enjoyed the sound of you. Your cries were soft and fragile, a mere whisper of distress as you struggled for the woman below you, wanting to make her happy, give her the pleasure she received by pleasuring and having her way with you. You grasped onto Shuri’s curls, feeling her coiled hair through your fingers as you tussled with your orgasm that was on the brink of breaking through.

“Sh-Shuri…please.”

“Hmmm??”

“Please, baby, please. I have to.”

“I know, my impatient girl. You can cum now.”

“Oh…OH. FUCK.”

You fucked yourself against her face, her tongue moving in and out as her nose bumped your clit and you watched your cum trickle along the angular contours of her jaw, glistening against the richness of her beautiful complexion.

“Oooo fuck. Shuri.”

Shuri took one last lick through your folds, attempting to clean you dry but your continual leaking for her made it impossible. She stands on her two feet, resting between your opened legs as she’s greeted with the most vulnerable version of yourself, visibly struggling to recover from the intensity of your orgasms and it was that sight of you that nearly caused her to lose complete control.

“You’re shaking, y/n,” she cooed with a tease. “I’m just getting started with you. I haven’t even fucked you yet.”

“Mmmm.”

“Is that what you want from me? Does getting fucked by a vampire make you wet?,” she asks in a condescending tone. You cannot answer with words, no matter how hard you try and so you nod your head in sheer desperation.

“You will be broken by the time I am down with you. Ruined for anyone who tries to come after me.”

You could hear her voice, yet you were deeply disconnected, unable to fully grasp the profound meaning behind her words and it was so apparent to Shuri that she felt she had to resort to communicating to you telepathically in an attempt to reunite your mind with your body.

“You’re ok, s’thandwa. Follow my voice.” The voice in your head pulled you back to reality, your pussy was still aching but your mind was at ease.

“Now listen to me, y/n. Being with a vampire is nothing like being with a human, especially that little boy you almost called a husband. I’m going to fuck you, and I’m going to fuck you good. If at any point I’m going too hard or I’m hurting you, I need you to let me know.”

“Mhmm,” you manage to say. She cups your face in her hands, brushing the tears that sat on your waterline with the tips of her thumbs, and god, she was in love with you.

“You’re so pretty, y/n.”

“Please, Shuri.”

“Please, what?”

“I want—need you…”

“Mmmm,” she hums knowingly, her eyes dark and seeping in lust as she teasingly drags a finger through your sopping folds, and you wince at her touch, simultaneously wanting more and running away from the stimulation her touch gave you.

“Please? Please, Shuri? I n-need you. Unh.”

“Ssshhh, I know baby, I know. I want to take my time with you.”

Your soft whines of overwhelming pleasure climbed up your throat as she brushed her fingers between your puffy folds, purposefully avoiding your clit and it is enough to make you lose your mind but this is how she wants you; desperate, needy, craving more. But once she presses your clit, you let out a wail as you softly cry at her touch, tears falling down your cheeks.

“My little cry baby.” Her voice is condescending, belittling as she plays between the swollen flesh.

“That’s right, y/n. Cry for me. Show me how much it is.”

“Fuck me?,” you whimper.

“Bast, you’re needy, huh?” she says with a smirk, your desperate plea shooting an ache into Shuri’s pussy because she needed you just as bad, her vampire lust surpassing that of a human experience.

“I know I am…it’s just Jonathan…he n-never—”

“I know, princess. It’s ok. I got you now, I’ll take care of you.”

“Unh.”

“Oh sthandwa, I’m going to fucking ruin you.” She said this like it was a promise, like she was sure no one would come after her and if they did, they wouldn’t make it too far. You moan as Shuri plunges her fingers into your cunt, falling in love with the way you immediately clench around her, your greedy cunt letting more slick pour out for her.

“My pretty slut to ruin.”

“I don’t care, just ruin me.” You buck your hips into her fingers in desperation, craving more and more from her and you were so embarrassed with how loud your pussy was, how much your clenching walls needed her but you didn’t care enough to stop yourself.

“Please, baby, pleeaseee,” you beg. “Fuck me, Shuriiiii.”

Shuri chuckles, licking her lips as she salivates at the sight of you, finding it increasingly more and more challenging to restrain her hunger. She could sense your heartbeat growing louder, sense the blood flowing through your veins and your pussy walls, and she wanted it, wanted you. She wanted to witness your struggle as she claimed from you what sustained her life as she fucked you into another realm of sex.

“Oh fuck,” you whine as Shuri's touch finds the bundle of nerves inside you, intensifying the throb within your walls as your pussy squeezed her fingers. She swiftly took her fingers out, leaving you to whimper at the emptiness you felt yet that sensation quickly dissipates as Shuri starts swishing your clit from side to side. Your eyes roll back, and uncontrollable groans take over.

“Unh…Shuri…fuck, I’m gonna—you’re gonna make me—“ but Shuri immediately detached from you, your slick sticking to her fingers and creating a trail on the floor.

“You’re a messy girl, huh? Fuck…open your mouth for me.” And you do, moaning at the taste of your own flavor and the sight makes Shuri so horny, so wet, she cannot stand to not be inside you any longer. She wanted to feel how deep you were as she buried herself inbetween your dark thighs, get lost in the way your pussy swelled up with each hard thrust she fucked into you. Shuri removes your top and her bottoms, leaving you both in nothing but your bras just before Shuri fiddles with the device on her wrist, her strap snugly fitting to her waist. Your eyes subtly widen at the size of her, she was much bigger than that fucking man you hated so much. Shuri grabbed her shaft, slowly pumping it as she brought it to the swells of your folds, rubbing her tip against your overwhelmed clit and you whimpered at the touch. She puts the tip in, and you immediately clench around the sheer girth of her tip, letting out a soft scream as your body grapples with her size.

“Yeah, you’re gonna be fun to play with,” she comments with a sly smile. She lifts you up and you wrap your legs around her once more, your clit is pressed into her dick making your kisses turn into cluttered moans as you pant into her mouth. She grabs your ass and presses you into her, guiding your hips to grind into her until finally you meet her bedroom and your back hits her mattress, her lean but muscular body hovering over you as she purposefully made sure her shaft caressed your clit. She continued to press fervent kisses into your mouth, in awe of the way your mouth struggles to reciprocate those kisses as you feel her dick moving between your folds, caressing your bulging, beating clit.

“Look at you, how helpless you are,” she taunts as your breathing picks up.

“Shuri pleeasseee,” you whine, so overwhelmed and loving the way she took her time with you. This was all a new feeling to you, your mind and body being loved and explored and it was almost all too much, but your need for her overtook that feeling. Shuri removes herself from on top of you, resting her back against the headboard and she gestured for you to come sit on top of her.

“Take this off,” you complain, gesturing to her bra. She grins before crossing her arms and removing her bra. Her perky breasts were so beautiful and you could not help but take one of her erect nipples into your mouth and it causes her to moan, a sound you could never get tired of.

“Turn around for me.”

“But I won’t be able to see you.”

“That doesn’t matter, you’ll feel me.”

“But—” and she cuts you off by snaking her hand around your throat, causing an immediate gasp to escape your lips. She applies a gentle pressure to your windpipe, deliberately restraining her vampire strength to avoid hurting you. You revel in the way she makes you feel, sensing her containment of crossing the boundaries of her strength and it makes you feel dizzy. Using your throat as a grip, she turns your body towards the mirror.

“I love how you look when you shut up,” she whispers into you, her palm still firmly placed around your neck and you stifle a choked whimper, grasping onto her forearm as you feel her veins protruding through her human-like skin. She takes her tip once again, placing it between your sopping wet folds and your eyebrows clench together in anticipation.

“You ready, princess?”

You nod, and finally, finally you feel full, filled to the brim as her dick moves inside you, stretching you out in ways you have never before and she feels devine. You knew in that instant, she had left an eternal mark on you and you wanted to keep her inside you forever. Shuri whispered praises into you, making sure you knew just how much your needy pussy was squeezing her dick, how deep and wet you were as she thrusted slow, harsh movements that reverberated into your pussy walls and it fucked your mind up. Your moans were staggered, uncontrolled sounds as Shuri’s hand remained around your throat, pressing kisses into your shoulder.

“Shuri,” you cried and she removed her hand from your throat, and when you thought it was over, she unclipped your bra, grazing the material over your nipples as she brought the skimpy fabric to your throat, brushing it over your trachea and you swallowed in anticipation, understanding what she was going to do next and you allowed it. She pulled it, pressing the fabric hard into your windpipe, not enough to choke you completely, but just enough to have you gasping as you left your breathing to her. The act was so sensual and heightened the pleasure that coursed through you as she continued to thrust into you, trailing her other hand down your torso until she reached your clit, circling your bud excessively.

“Oh fuck, Shuri…yes, YES. UNH.”

She admired the view in the mirror in front of you two, got lost in the way your breasts bounced with each hard thrust she pounded into you, the sweat and drool that trickled down the valley between them and you were both a wreck, both so close to your release.

“That’s it…that’s…fuck. That’s a good girl. My good girl.”

“Fuck. I’m gonna cum again, Shuri. Can I? Please?”

“Mhmmm,” is all Shuri can manage to say as she approaches her own orgasm, tugging the fabric into your windpipe and you let out a strangled moan.

“Sh-Shuri…I’m cumming. Shit, don’t stop fucking me. Keep ch-choking me j-just like that. Oh…unh.”

Your orgasm surged within you like a forceful, tumultuous wave, roughly rushing through every aspect of your existence. It started in your pussy, pounding through your throbbing walls before spreading through your veins and dominating your entire body. It was seraphic, a celestial pulse that made you squirm against her, moaning through it as you noticed Shuri approaching her own high but she quickly dug her face into the nape of your neck, an attempt to contain her own moans that threatened to escape her throat.

“Fuck…y/n…,” she sobbed into your skin.

“No, d-don’t do that. Fall part for me, Shuri. I w-want to see it. Let me see what I do to y-you, baby.”

“N-nkoszana…”

“Cum inside me Shuri. Please.”

With her vampire speed, she switches the position so you’re lying on your back and you’re met with the hunger that surged through her eyes right before she pressed her lips into the side of your throat as her moans sink into your skin.

“I-I can’t,” she whimpers. “I need it. I need you.”

And immediately you understand what she’s talking about. She wants you. All of you.

“Unh.”

“Ssshhh, baby, it’s ok. Drink from me, Shuri. I know, just…please.”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” she struggles to say in your neck and your heart races. Everything is pounding. Your head. Your heart, Your pussy. And you were so overwhelmed but she was buried so deep into you, her thrusts were so surreal and you were no longer fearful of the woman above you. She was unraveling before you, revealing her true self and desires, baring it all before you.

“I-I—“

“I know Sh-Shuri…it’s ok. I promise, it’s ok.” You’re grasping her curls, moaning into the curve of her neck and she lets out one last beaten whimper before she sinks her teeth into your throat. It hurts at first, a sharp pain that scared you but the more you basked in it, the better it felt. Her plunges into you were getting sloppy and uncoordinated and it did not take long before you could feel her dick twitch inside you, grazing your walls as her cum spilled into your used pussy. It was an exchange of want, giving you her cum as she took your blood and it only took a few more messy pumps until you were cumming as well, one last blissful orgasm as your mind danced with stars. You are both moaning in each other's necks, the pulse in your pussy slowing down, a hard yet slow beat that had you twitching and your heartbeat felt the same. As Shuri continues to drink from you, you begin to feel dizzy, lightheaded, your physical body needing her to stop but your mind and your pussy ached for more.

“Sh-Shuri…I-I think—unh.”

“Mmmm,” Shuri moaned, struggling to detach from you, in a world she craved for for so long as your blood brought her to a state of ecstasy. You were addicting, making it a struggle to stop as her body rushed with pleasure.

“Shuri…baby…”

Your breathless whimpers forced Shuri to release you, her face drawing closer to yours, yet she looked so different. Her dark brown eyes transformed into a blood-red hue, her fangs fully extended, and her mouth stained with your blood. The image frightened you at first and Shuri looked away in shame, attempting to conceal the face she despised so deeply.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled, ashamed of herself.

“Hey, hey, look at me. Don’t hide from me, Shuri. I-I want to see you. The real you.” Raising your hand to her face, you guide her gaze back to yours and slowly, she complies, exposing herself openly, displaying her true self and she was hauntingly beautiful. You tenderly caress her face, appreciating the intense red in her eyes, the sharpness of her fangs, and your blood trickling beneath them, her mouth colored crimson from the intimate exchange.

“I’m sorry,” she repeats and you gently hush her.

“Ssshhh, it’s ok, baby, it’s ok. I’m not hurt, ok? You didn’t hurt me. You did amazing, my love. You did so well.”

She nods and as you lean in to kiss her, the flavor of your blood meets your taste buds and though it isn’t pleasant, the significance of the act outweighs the taste. Shuri cleansed your lips of your blood by licking them, then did the same for herself before withdrawing her strap that was still buried inside you.

She runs her tongue over the blood that stains your neck before planting a kiss on your forehead. Cradling your head in her hand, she gently leans your forehead against hers and whispers:

“That was better than I ever imagined.”

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Both of you lay sprawled against her bed sheets, cuddling against her chest as you bask her scent while the sound of waves crashing not too far away filled the air.

“I have one more question, and then I think I’m done.”

Shuri chuckles at you. “And what would that be, s’thandwa?”

“So vampires are like…dead, right?”

“Undead.”

“Yeah yeah, whatever…I just wanna know…how exactly does one become a vampire?”

Shuri raises her eyebrow. “Why do you need to know that?”

You roll your eyes. “No reason, I’m just curious. Like there obviously has to be some kind of process.”

“Well of course there is.”

“So then tell me.”

Shuri gets up, presses her back against the headboard and you straddle her. She eyes the bite mark on your neck, tracing the unhealed scar and you wince.

“So fragile,” she whispers, almost mockingly and your heartbeat escalates and Shuri hears it, causing her to softly chuckle.

“What?”

“What?”

“You’re always laughing at me, so what’s funny?”

“Nothing, it’s just…I love the way your body responds to me.”

You gaze at her in confusion and she only stares at you in admiration, a profound sense of affection and tenderness reflected in sharp gaze. Her expressions held an unspoken language, a silent conversation that speaks volumes of how much she loved you.

“To become a vampire, you need to be dying, at the threshold of death. Then a vampire will give you their blood to drink, once that blood enters your system, it will kill you completely.”

You softly gulp.

“And then the blood will ‘fix you.’ Rid you of any scars and imperfections, rid you of wounds and disease until your body is brand new and strong and gives you back your life, making you the strongest you’ve ever felt. But not without consequence…of course.”

“That sounds…terrible,” you softly laugh.

“Trust me…it is,” she chuckles along with you, drawing you closer for a kiss that you wish could linger forever.

“The sun will be coming up soon. You’ll have to stay here until it goes back down, I won’t be able to drive you home until then.”

“That’s fine,” you reassure. “I’m tired as fuck anyway, I’ll probably just sleep here.”

She nods in agreement.

“Shuri…?”

“Yes, y/n?”

“I lied earlier…I actually have one more question.

Shuri sighs. “Last one?”

“For now.”

Shuri rolls her eyes. “I’m all ears.”

You place a quick peck on her lips before you proceed. “You know I love you, right?”

“For a while now,” she teases and you flick her shoulder. “Is that your question?”

“No.”

“Well I’m waiting…”

A deafening silence enveloped your surroundings, overpowering Shuri's heightened senses, allowing only the distant waves' sound, the rhythm of your heartbeat, and your faint breath to echo through her ears. Your palms began to sweat, and you nervously bit on your bottom lip as you contemplated whether to proceed with your question. Shuri gazed at you, filled with anticipation, almost wishing she had the ability to read minds so she could put her own at ease.

“Y/n, you’re scaring me…what is it?”

Your eyes glistened, and she sensed the hairs on your arms standing on end, yet your voice shattered the silence with your burning question; one she had hoped never to hear again.

“Turn me?” ❁ཻུ۪۪♡

Whew fuck, I need her baadddddd. Also, thank you so much for 800+ followers on here, that’s insane! Love you all and congrats if you made it through that long ass fic

[monstersandmaw]

Male gnoll x gn reader (nsfw)

Disclaimer which I’m including in all my works after plagiarism and theft has taken place: I do not give my consent for my works to be used, copied, published, or posted anywhere. They are copyrighted and belong to me. 

As promised, the modern gnoll story is here!

Content: insecure, squishy, gender and body neutral reader; praise kink from gnoll boy if you squint; penetrative sex, knotting.

There's also very fleeting mention of a young, terminally ill patient passing off-screen. If you want to skip that entirely, skip from: "Halfway through the third time you encountered him there though, he got a call on his phone and his whole demeanour changed." to the paragraph beginning: "Three days later, and you’d been to the gym every day in the hopes of catching him, you hadn’t seen him."

Wordcount: 6934

You stared at the weights rack and felt a bead of sweat roll down your spine that had nothing to do with your previous sets.

This would be the heaviest you’d ever attempted to chest press, and while it might not be much by some people’s standards — that half-orc last week had really put you off your stride by snorting at you, but we can’t all be built like brick fucking walls, can we? — it was more than you’d tried so far. But you were ready. You just… needed someone to spot for you. Just in case. Safety first, and all that.

But the only people in the weights section were the kind of people who, through no real fault of their own, you tended to find nauseatingly intimidating. Like that troll who could probably bench press one of you in each hand. Or that werewolf who was fully shifted and currently on her hundredth(?) chin-up on the bars. Or that gnoll. He’d been doing slow, measured bicep curls for the past five minutes and you’d been trying not to stare at him. Most male gnolls were a bit smaller than their female counterparts, and tended to be less aggressive and competitive in the gym, but this guy was huge.

You must have looked a little too long though, because his dark, rounded ear twitched and he turned his head to look at you. Instead of glaring at you, he offered you a wide, friendly grin that showed off his massive, chunky teeth and made you a bit weak at the knees. Always good to go weak at the joints when you were about to attempt a personal best in the weights section at the gym…

Fuck.

“You ok?” he asked, setting down a dumbbell that was heavy enough to double as a battleship anchor, and you swallowed.

Now or never.

“I…” you croaked and cleared your throat, looking down at the bench and back up at him.

“You want someone to spot for you?” he asked, stepping a little closer. His paws were massive and while he had clothes on — black gym shorts and a big, baggy, white tank top — he wore no shoes. His claws flexed as his dark, smoky brown pads spread to take his weight, and you swallowed again. He had really adorable freckle-like spots up his shaggy legs too.

“If you wouldn’t mind?” you finally managed to squeak.

At that, he beamed at you and gave a gnollish giggle that seemed genuinely pleased. “Happy to.”

“Thanks,” you mumbled, and took a breath for courage. No going back now.

You lay down on the bench and he came to stand behind the rack. His big, clawed hands hooked under the bar but he didn't take any of its weight as you adjusted your grip and got settled, and prepared to lift it free. He loomed over you, his face serious with concentration. It was a comfort to know he was focused on the task, not gawping around at the other gym-goers. The future integrity of your chest and ribs depended on his concentration if your arms failed you, after all. You had no doubts about his strength though. He really was massive.

Getting your breathing under control, you shoved carefully upwards, and he grinned as you took its weight and began your reps. After five, you felt your arms start to burn, but you pushed on towards ten.

At nine, your muscles shuddered in complaint.

“You’ve got this,” he said in a low, quiet rumble, and it spurred you on to do the last one. You hooked it back in place and met his dark brown eyes. “Nailed it,” he grinned, all teeth and joy. “I reckon you can go up another five kilograms…”

“I’m not sure,” you replied, sitting up carefully and swinging your feet off to one side. The idea of making it heavier seemed overwhelming.

“I’ll spot you again, don’t worry,” he said, reaching for a couple of the smallest weight plates from the rack and slotting them easily onto the end of your bar. “But you definitely had some in the tank. Take a minute, have a drink, and go again.”

His quiet, easy conviction was enviable, but it sparked something in you that had been dormant for a long time. Or maybe it had been smothered into dormancy. Either way, it felt a lot like the echo of self-confidence, though the feeling was unfamiliar these days.

When you set down your water bottle and paused to let your muscles relax after the first set of reps, your eye was caught by a wiry looking goblin doing weighted squats on the far side of the room. She had iron grey hair and looked to be in her sixties or seventies, and you felt the heat of shame flood your cheeks when you realised she was lifting more than you could, at half your height and a fraction of your body-weight.

Seeing where you were looking, the gnoll gave a little snicker and said, “Oh boy, don’t compare yourself to Rose, friend. I’ve seen her outlast full-grown orcs in friendly pull-up competitions, and she can plank for an hour without breaking a sweat. Goblins are made of steel, I swear. Focus on your own journey.”

You laughed, feeling stupidly grateful to him for his kind reassurance.

“Come on. Give it a go?” he said, and you nodded and lay back. “I’ll be here. I won’t let you hurt yourself,” he added.

It was a struggle, but you made it to five before you needed a pause, and he hooked his rough-padded fingers under the bar and took the weight for a second.

“Breathe, and then just five more.”

Somehow when he said it like that, it didn’t seem so bad.

Things got tricky at eight, but you gritted your teeth and pushed through, and when you hit ten and he took it from you, your arms felt like wet noodles, but you’d done it.

“Alright!” he exclaimed as you sat up and cast him a sidelong look. He offered his paw for a high-five, and, embarrassed by his enthusiasm for you, you answered it. The pads of his paws were rough and warm, and his entire hand almost engulfed yours. When you lowered your gaze again, you could just see his little tail wagging back and forth and that finally brought a huge smile to your face. How long had it been since someone was genuinely excited for your achievements?

“Thank you,” you mumbled, your voice cracking a bit. “That was really kind of you. I’m sorry I interrupted your workout.”

“Not at all,” he smiled. “Happy to help, and you smashed it! I’ll leave you to get on, but shout if you need me to spot for you again.”

“Thanks,” you said, but your shyness returned, and you didn’t trouble him again that session.

Three days later, you were back in the gym with your muscles mostly recovered. On the ground floor of the building, there was a huge swimming pool and as you passed the viewing window you could see a couple of humans and a few orcs and perhaps an elf doing serious, focused laps in the swimming lanes, barely making a splash as they powered through the water. This whole ‘fitness drive’ thing was still pretty new to you, and just walking up the stairs into the upper level of the gym where the machines and weights were sparked the same nauseous anxiety in the pit of your stomach that you always experienced at the thought of going to a public gym. You didn’t look like someone who belonged here, with soft edges and extra weight in places it wasn’t conventionally attractive for humans to carry it, and while you weren’t really here to please other people, you were trying to take better care of yourself lately and that, unfortunately, involved exercise.

Your eyes scanned the space and you’d have been lying if you weren’t searching for a flash of honey-coloured fur. There was a large group of orcs messing around in the weights section, so you bailed and headed blindly for the nearest cardio machine, heart pounding in a way that made you want to throw up.

“Guess I’m running today,” you muttered under your breath as you stepped automatically up onto the treadmill. Panic had made you go to this one, and you thought you’d probably look even more stupid if you changed your mind now.

After an overly-long warm-up walk, you cranked it to something manageable and felt your body complain already. You made it to about one kilometre before you had to stop. Deciding to pretend you’d always intended to use it merely as a way to loosen up, you hit the ‘stop’ button and ignored its friendly advice to do a cool down, grabbing your water bottle from the holder and turning around to see if there was enough room in the weights area for you to slink in and do a few reps.

And there, looking at you across the room, was the gnoll from before.

Your heart flip-flopped in your chest, first with delight and then with horror as you realised he must have seen you lumbering away on the treadmill. Fuck.

But when he met your eye, he grinned, showing all his teeth, and he waved. You smiled back, and wove your way through the bristling array of cardio machines to join him.

“Hey,” he said, scratching behind one large ear with his right paw. “I wasn’t sure if you were a regular… I kind of thought I might never see you again.”

“No, I’m usually wheezing away in a corner at around this time every few days,” you snorted.

He didn’t laugh at your self-deprecating humour though, and instead turned his muzzle towards the weights. “You need someone to spot for you again?”

You bit your lip. “Yeah, I guess. You can be my cheerleader again too if you like,” you added with a spur-of-the-moment burst of bravery.

“Gladly,” he giggled, tail wagging back and forth. “You wanna do a few warm up rounds first? I just got here, so I’m kind of cold anyway.”

As before, when you were ready, he came over and stood at the head of the bench, hands ready to catch the bar. It was harder to concentrate this time round, with him looming over you. He had to be nearly seven feet tall, though he had that distinctive hunch that gnolls’ unique biology lent to their kind where werewolves were more upright.

When he took the bar from you at the end of your first set of reps, his fingers brushed yours and you nearly gasped at how velvet-soft his fur was. “Thank you,” you said, and as you sat up to take your short break, you introduced yourself by name.

“I’m Cade,” he replied, and stuck out his hand for you to shake.

Conscious that your palms were probably super sweaty, you tried not to flush hot and make it even worse, and you slid your hand into his. Again, the size of him was striking, and you felt something in your core tighten and start to tingle at the sight of it, let alone the feel of his paw flexing around your hand. His claws were dark and neatly rounded and you wondered what he did for a living. Most gnolls — not that you knew any personally — seemed to have active, outdoorsy jobs, but there was something about him that made you curious.

“Ready for round two?” he asked, and you got back to it with a shy smile. “Ah, come on. It’s not that bad, is it? You might even learn to love it soon.”

“It’s better with company,” you admitted as you took the weight of the bar and looked up just in time to watch his face go from serious to delighted at the compliment. “Not sure I’ll ever come to love it though. Not the way you seem to.”

He grinned and giggled gnollishly — the sound high and bright and a little silly coming from someone so intimidatingly built — and you couldn’t help the way your heart felt a little lighter and your body a little more energised. “I did consider changing careers to become a personal trainer for a while,” he said while you started to count your second set.

“Oh?” You didn’t have the breath to ask anything more articulate, but he didn’t seem to mind.

“Mm. I just enjoy helping people out, I guess.”

“What do you do now for work?” you asked in a bit of a garbled rush between reps six and seven.

“I’m a paediatric nurse,” he said, and you nearly dropped the bar on your chest. He reached down and snatched it before it had even dropped an inch, and he shot you a look. “Don’t worry, I’m used to that reaction,” he said with a wink. “I was expecting it.”

“Sorry,” you said. Jeez, what a charmer. “I just… I wouldn’t have thought… you know… I’m sorry.”

“Eh, it’s fine,” he said. “Come on, get to ten and I’ll tell you the rest.”

You pushed through the last three and he took the bar and rested it on its hooks, allowing you to sit up with thrumming muscles in your shoulders and arms. You stretched out and twisted your neck to look up at him from your seat on the bench.

“We have a bad reputation still,” he sighed, “But actually, traditionally, male gnolls are the caretakers in our clans. Historically, the females did all the fighting and protecting, and we raised the cubs and taught them the basics before they went on to train with the females.” He shot you a cheeky look and added, “Statistically, male gnolls are the least likely of almost all species to be aggressive, so despite appearances, we make perfect caretakers. The kids at the hospital love me, once they get past the teeth and the size.”

“I can see why,” you said faintly.

Cade pulled a wide smile and eyed the bar. “Go for three sets this time?”

You did, and when you were done, you thanked him, and then headed to grab a kettle bell to do some other exercises. If both of you kept sneaking glances at each other for the rest of your session, well, at least it wasn’t just you.

Halfway through the third time you encountered him there though, he got a call on his phone and his whole demeanour changed. You’d been doing some lower-weight dead lifts, and as you set the bar down on the mat you watched all the joy bleed out of him; his tail bristled high and stiff, his ears swivelled back almost flat against his head, and his big brown eyes went wide with distress.

“Shit, now?” he hissed, turning away from you. “Fuck. Ok, I’ll be there as soon as I can. No, don’t worry about it. Thanks for telling me. Ok, I’ll see you soon.”

He hung up, took a deep breath, and then slowly looked over his shoulder at you. “I… I have to go. I’m sorry. Don’t try any more without someone to spot for you, ok?”

You nodded. “You alright?”

He bit his lip and shook his head. “No, not really. One of my patients is… Uh… Yeah. Not long left, apparently.”

“Oh shit, Cade,” you said, crossing to him. You laid your hand on his fluffy forearm and squeezed the solid muscle beneath your fingers. He seemed to relax just a fraction at that. “You need someone to give you a lift to the hospital? My car’s outside.”

Again, he bit his lip and then nodded. “You wouldn’t mind? I was gonna get the bus.”

You shook your head. “Of course not. Let’s go.”

He was mostly silent for the journey, his knee bouncing as he sat crammed into in the front of your car, but when you approached the main entrance to the hospital, he said, “You can just use the drop-off at the front. Thank you again. I’ll… I’ll see you around, ok?”

You nodded and reached for his arm again. “Take care of yourself.”

He smiled, gave a low rumbling noise that you’d never heard him make before, and then climbed out and strode into the hospital without a backward glance. You looked down at the seat and found a fair few golden hairs stuck to the fabric, and didn’t have the heart to brush them away.

Three days later, and you’d been to the gym every day in the hopes of catching him, you hadn’t seen him. Your mood was decidedly flat as you stepped out into the fresh night air and tried to plaster on a smile when your best friend uncoiled his muscular, python’s tail from the back of the taxi that was waiting at the curb and flung his arms around you. His dark brown skin had a pearlescent shimmer to it and his long, thick brown hair was plaited into a thick braid that hung down his spine. He wore a glittery, black shirt studded with a rainbow of rhinestones that matched the iridescent gleam that seemed to hover over his snake’s tail too, and he had the most exquisitely neat makeup on that you’d ever seen.

“Gods, Mal, you look incredible,” you wheezed as he hugged you.

“You look good too, sweetheart,” he grinned back. “Any sign of your delicious little puppy at the gym today? No, of course not. If there had been, you wouldn’t looked like a kicked puppy yourself. Come on. It’s my birthday. You’re not allowed to mope,” he said, and he practically bundled you into the back of the taxi before going round to the other side and piling in beside you.

He gave the driver the name of the club, and the car set off.

“There’ll be so many beautiful people there tonight, you’ll forget all about this gnoll of yours, I swear,” he practically purred in your ear, and you tried to smile.

“Happy birthday, by the way,” you said, and you drew an envelope from your clutch and handed it to him.

He frowned. “What’s this? We don’t do cards or presents anymore, sweetie,” he scowled, but he did look secretly pleased.

“Couldn’t resist this one,” you shrugged.

The card was nothing very special, just a lame joke about not throwing a hissy fit on your birthday, but it predictably made Mal groan and roll his eyes. “Really, darling? Didn’t we get over the reptile jokes in kindergarten?”

You did manage to muster a heartfelt smirk at that, and waved your hand. “I couldn’t resist,” you said again.

“You’re awful. I love you so much,” he laughed, and tugged you into a sideways hug in his arms. “You’re the only person I tolerate this kind of shit from, you know that?”

“Yeah,” you smiled.

For a long moment, Mal held you and then he let you go and sighed softly. “I want you to be happy, you know?” he said. “You’ve been, like… ‘background miserable’ for ages.”

“I’ll try,” you said. It had been easier until Cade had vanished.

The club was packed already, but Mal dragged you to the front of the line and the two of you were admitted like celebrities and shown to the VIP area of the club. Perks of being with the brother of the owner, you supposed. Yves came over to greet you and his brother and to wish Mal a happy birthday. His present, it turned out, was unlimited drinks for the two of you all night.

For an hour, you and Mal chatted and drank leisurely, and watched the people out on the dance floor that was slightly below your booth, but just as Mal slithered with enviable elegance off the bench and started to make his way towards the dance floor, dragging you along with him, you caught sight of the familiar shape of a gnoll’s ears and froze so abruptly that your hands were torn from Mal’s grip.

“What, Sweets?”

You frowned, trying to make out the figure that was across the space, apparently also being dragged by his friends onto the floor. It was him. It was Cade. You had to laugh, and just as you did, he looked up.

His jaw dropped and he fell utterly still as well, then he laughed and shook his head.

“No way,” Mal breathed, now leaning in to hiss in your ear. “That’s him?”

“Yeah,” you said, and as Cade joined you, Mal — the cheeky shit that he was — gave you a solid shove between your shoulder blades.

You stumbled forwards and Cade shot his hands out to catch you before you planted face-first onto the dance floor. You whipped around the moment he had steadied you, and shot Mal the most venomous glare you could, and then turned back to Cade. “Thanks,” you yelled above the music. “My meddling best friend isn’t exactly known for his subtlety.”

“It’s ok,” Cade chuckled. “It’s good to see you. Sorry I haven’t made it to the gym lately. You find someone to spot for you?”

You shook your head and realised you were still holding his forearms. He hadn’t let go either, so neither did you. “How are you doing? I was worried about you when I didn’t see you after… you know…”

He bowed his head in understanding. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think you’d worry about me, if I’m honest. I’m good. It wasn’t entirely unexpected, even if it was still really sad. It’s part of the job sometimes though. It’s… It’s not my first. But I’m not here to mope.”

“Why are you here then?” you asked, squeezing his forearm gently as someone knocked into you from the side. “You look about as comfortable as I am in places like this…”

His ears were pricked as far forward as they could go, straining like satellite dishes to catch your words above the thundering music, and the urge to make an inhuman squeak rose up your throat like a physical presence. For someone so huge and muscular, he had no right to look so heartbreakingly cute.

“My friends’ house purchase went through so they decided to celebrate and drag me out with them. You?”

“Mal's birthday. His brother owns the club, so we’ve had free drinks for the night.”

“Nice,” Cade laughed. “You want to dance?”

You did, but it wasn’t something you were any good at. Then again, looking around you, there weren’t many you’d have said were actually dancing. Shyly, you managed a nod, and he grinned at you again, and held out both paws. You slid your hands into them and he exhaled, his chest falling noticeably.

“What?”

“You’re so small,” he said. “I… I’m so afraid I’m going to crush you all the time.”

“You won’t,” you smiled, and stepped even closer to him. Close enough to smell the soft musk that rose from his fur. Close enough to see the lights reflected in his coffee-dark eyes and watch the way the pale whiskers on his dark muzzle splayed wide with his anticipation. In the lights you noticed that the white trim of fur along the outer edge of his ears looked like a fine line of silver. “You’re really beautiful, Cade,” you whispered, certain that the music would drown your words, but he pulled his dark lips back in a broad grin and dipped his head shyly.

He turned you in his arms so that your back was to his chest and he stepped a little closer, moving his hands to your waist. You tried to fight the self-consciousness that roared to life like a wildfire in your mind, and when he felt you tense, he leaned down and murmured in your ear, “Is this alright?”

You nodded and leaned back into him, looking up at his pale throat and chest. It was a surprisingly familiar view by now after your sessions in the gym. He was wearing loose jeans that ended at the knee, the way many non-humans did, and he had a black t-shirt on that fitted his muscular frame beautifully. His red-gold mane melted into the dark fur of his ears and the creamy underside of his chin and neck, and you wanted to melt against him and have him hold you forever.

“Yes,” you exhaled. “It’s just been a while, that’s all.”

“We can go however slow you like, but you should know I like you,” he said in a low, inviting rumble. He pressed his cold nose carefully against your cheek and then nuzzled you with his jaw. “A lot. Gods, you smell amazing,” he blurted, as if he couldn't help himself.

That self-conscious heat evolved into something entirely different, and pure want coursed through you instead. You ached again and your body seemed to prickle all over with desire.

His hands drifted a fraction lower, to frame your hips, and his fingers dug into your soft flesh. Above the music you heard him give a long, deep lowing sound; primal and visceral and honest in its appreciation, and it made you shiver.

You lost track of time as you danced together. It wasn’t so much ‘dancing’ as ‘sharing the same space and touching wherever you could both get away with it before it became completely indecent’.

At one point, when you’d turned to face him again, someone nudged into you from behind and a hand wandered over your back, and you flinched closer to Cade. He pulled his lips back and showed all his teeth, and the human who had wandered too close to your corner of paradise shied away with hands raised.

“Didn’t take you for the jealous type,” you said, and Cade growled at you instead.

“I’m not,” he said. “But I am protective. If you want to leave here with someone else tonight instead of me, I won’t stop you.”

“I don’t want to,” you said, placing your hand on the centre of his chest. “I’m not sure I’m ready to go home with you tonight either, but I do want your number and I do want to see you again.”

He smiled, and drew his phone from his back pocket. He twitched his muzzle towards the edge of the dance floor and then offered you his palm, leading you through the jostling crowd towards a quieter spot and shielding you with the bulk of his body when you had to force your way through the crush. You exchanged numbers, and then he looked over your shoulder and said, “Your friend is coming over.”

You turned to find Mal easing his way around the edge of the dance floor. He was moving slowly, carefully, the way he did when he was very drunk and trying not to show it. “Ah, man, I’ll have to get him home safely,” you sighed. “I guess this is goodbye for now.”

Cade nodded. “I’ll see you both to a cab if you like.”

“You are protective,” you chuckled.

“I’m not hearing a ‘no’.”

“No, you’re not,” you smiled. “If you like, you can get on the other side of Mal and see that he doesn’t slither off somewhere.”

The two of you wrangled a very curious and very obvious Mal into the back of a cab, and Cade came to stand with his hands on your waist. “Can I kiss you?” he asked, his ears tilted back in a perfect display of meek shyness.

“Yes,” you exhaled.

He lowered his head and brought his muzzle to your lips. His mouth was soft against yours and he pressed his lips against you and then let the very tip of his tongue lave over your lips while his rough hands rose to cup your jawline and hold your face delicately. Cade didn’t spend long kissing you, since it was evident that this was a human gesture for which his body was not really built, but he did move to nuzzle your cheek with the velvet fur of his muzzle before stepping back and breathing out a long sigh.

Before he could say anything sweet or romantic, Mal opened the door and half his tail spilled back out onto the tarmac, and he cursed. “Fuck. I just wanted to say to hurry the fuck up because I’m cold and drunk and I don’t want to sit the back of this cab any longer than I have to,” he slurred, his forked tongue thick with drink. “Sorry,” he tacked on a little late.

Cade chuckled and helped you tuck Mal’s python tail back into the car for a second time, and you shook your head. “I’m so sorry,” you said, and squeezed his arm. “I’ll see you at the gym? And I’ll text you.”

He nodded, and you got in to the taxi next to Mal and shot him a flat look. “That was not cool,” you said. “You only get a free pass because it’s your birthday.”

And with that, you told the driver his address, and then, when Mal was safely inside and a little more sober, you headed home.

A text was waiting from Cade but you saved it for when you were finally ready for bed, and as you lay there in the dark, you opened your messages with a little trepidation.

>> You looked so beautiful tonight. I was *this* close to not going out tonight, but I’m so glad I did. I hope you got back ok and that the birthday boy isn’t going to suffer too much. I’ll be at the gym tomorrow. Perhaps we can grab a coffee somewhere afterwards if you’re going to be around? Night, and sleep well. C x <<

You read it through four times before you replied, and after that, you saw each other every day for a fortnight solid.

It started with coffee after the gym and then progressed to drinks, and then drinks and a snack, and then dinner, and then dinner and a movie, and then dinner and the same movie again because there was nothing else on that you wanted to watch, and then dinner and a stroll along the riverbank while the city lights twinkled around you. Finally, after two weeks of meeting every day, he took your hands in his and kissed you silly on one of the bridges over the river.

He nuzzled you afterwards and let out all these delicious, gnollish noises that made your heart skip and dance and skitter around like a trapped bird in your ribcage.

“I want you,” you gasped as he leaned you back a little way and closed his mouth around your neck, raking his teeth oh so gently across your skin. He froze, and then drew back.

“You mean it?” he asked in an equally soft voice. His dark eyes were huge and his ears frankly adorable as they swivelled first back against his head in uncertainty and then pricked forwards in undeniable hope. His tail rose high and fluffy behind him and you giggled softly.

“Yes, I mean it,” you laughed. “I want you.”

“Now?”

“Not ‘now on this bridge’,” you snorted. “Now as in tonight. Now as in take me home.”

“Yours or mine?”

“Whose is closer?” you asked in a decidedly hoarse voice.

He paused. “Mine, probably.”

“Then let’s go there.”

He held your hand all the way there, and stopped at least five more times to nuzzle you and kiss you.

You’d been to his a couple of times before during your whirlwind courtship, but you’d only cuddled on the sofa while eating popcorn and watching reruns of your favourite shows. This time, you didn't bother with the sofa.

You kicked off your shoes at the door and he backed you towards the bedroom, growling and making those delicious, low-frequency lowing sounds in a constant, rumbling song. He loomed over you, but you grinned up at him and tugged at the lower hem of his black t-shirt.

He tore it off over his head to reveal the coarse, ivory fur of his chest and throat, and you reached for him, watching as your fingers disappeared into it. He growled — actually growled — when you scrunched your fingers and tugged experimentally, and you looked up at him again. He was panting softly, eyes half-lidded with his muzzle tilted upwards a fraction.

“Bed. Now,” you said in an unusually assertive voice.

Cade gasped and then simply picked you up by the hips. You looped your legs around his middle and let him carry you into his bedroom, where he deposited you carefully onto the bed and leaned down over you. It didn’t take you long to discard your clothes and he stared at you in wonder when you lay back again.

He was hard and as he rutted through his jeans against your thigh, you arched your back off the bed and moaned. “Now, Cade. Please.”

You ached all over and you’d never been this turned on in all your life. Every nerve ending seemed to have been dialled up to eleven and every time his rough paws skimmed over your skin, you gasped and jerked and groaned.

“So sensitive,” he purred, leaning back to undo his jeans and cast them aside. His boxers came next, and you tried not to stare at the size of him. You hoped you could take him.

He knelt between your legs and gently bit and mouthed his way up your inner thighs before closing his mouth over you and letting his tongue savour you. It should have been unnerving to have the most powerful jaws of almost any creature on land so close to where you were most delicate, but it sent a thrill up your spine instead. He moved his head between your legs and you let your hand rest between his ears, guiding his pace and taming his ardour a little.

Cade drew back, his eyes glassy and his muzzle wet with a combination of your arousal and his drool, and he rasped, “You taste incredible.”

“I want to come with you inside me,” you moaned. “I want you to knot me, Cade.”

His eyes fluttered and rolled at that and he gripped his cock in one hand as though trying to stave off his own orgasm already. “Fuck,” he grunted. “Fuck, that’s about the hottest thing you could have said to me. I’m really not gonna last long now. Oh fuck, I can already feel —”

“Cade, inside me. Now.”

“You’re sure?”

“Cade…” There was a growl to your voice too.

His cock was leaking all over his hand, all over the back of his fingers, and he wasn’t even working himself. You weren’t going to need any extra help to ease him inside you, but you were going to need him to take it gently.

“Slowly,” you warned as he lined himself up. He nodded, looking nervous and earnest.

The tip of his cock nudged inside you and you groaned and lay back, enjoying the huge stretch of him. Cade, meanwhile, bit back a curse and began to shake all over.

“I can’t,” he gasped. “Please… I…”

“Keep going,” you said, sounding gloriously winded already and he was only a little way inside you. “Don’t stop.”

The gnoll let out a long, lowing groan and then braced himself on both arms. You drew your knees up to help him and he began to pant again. “Fuck,” he cursed as he eased himself further inside you. “Oh fuck, oh fuck, I can’t I’m… I’m going to come… fuck, you’re tight. Oh fuck, beautiful, I can’t…”

“Yes you can,” you crooned, though the seduction in your voice was a little strangled by the intensity of the stretch as he eased almost all the way into you. “You can wait for me, I know you can. You’re so good; you’re so kind, Cade. You’re going to make this amazing for me, I know you are…”

At the string of praise, his heavy jaws parted to show all his thick, sharp teeth and he began to shake with the effort of not plunging into you in a single stroke until finally, finally, he was seated inside you to the hilt of his cock.

“See?” you said, reaching for the ruff around his neck and threading your fingers into the depths of the soft fur.

He keened and began to rock his hips. “Please… Please can I move now?”

“Yes, Cade. Let me feel all of you inside me.”

What began as a slow, careful slide of his huge cock inside you hastened to a desperate rhythm in minutes. His hips snapped against yours and you felt the weight of his balls as they rocked against you with each thrust. Cade was whining with each stroke, and you realised that the delicious stretch was growing, and each time he withdrew, it was a little less far.

“You’re going to knot me, aren’t you?” you gasped, drawing your knees up even further so that he hit you just-so with the tip of his cock at the apex of each desperate thrust.

“Mmnn,” he whimpered. “Fuck. I’m so close. You’re so gorgeous. Been thinking about this since… since we danced. Gods, I wanted to fuck you that night. Came all over myself when I got home. Popped a knot and everything, oh fuck, oh fuck you’re so tight I’m going to come, I’m so close, I’m going to come, can I come? Please let me come, beautiful, please let me fill you —”

His babbling, rambling pleas devolved into another gnollish low and he threw his head back, picking up the desperate pace. His hands grabbed your hips and his claws pricked your skin as he pulled you further onto his growing knot with every thrust. Delirious pleasure coursed through you and you barely had the presence of mind left to give him the permission he clearly craved.

“Yes, come for me,” you slurred. “Come inside me, Cade. Fill me —”

With a roar, his hips snapped against yours one last time and his whole body locked up. His lips pulled back from his huge teeth into a rictus of ecstasy and his eyes rolled as he came in huge, shuddering waves, lost to the pleasure of your body as his knot finally swelled to fill you and the sensation of it tipped you over the edge as well. As your body clenched around him, he cursed again and tugged you somehow even further onto his knot. His hips spasmed against you and you could feel him emptying himself into you in waves.

It was a long time before he stopped coming, and even with his knot plugging you tight, you felt some of his come start to leak out around you already, spilling down your thighs and onto the sheet. “Fuck,” he hissed again, and his body went suddenly slack, though his chest was still heaving for breath.

He fell forwards over you and braced himself at the last second on his forearms. You lowered your legs and he grunted as the movement jolted his over-sensitive knot, but you stayed there for a long time.

Gradually, your breathing settled into the same rhythm and your heartbeats slowed, and a leaden satisfaction descended into your whole body. You felt full, and cherished as he held you.

You lost track of time as you lay there together, but finally his knot receded and you felt a lot more of his come start to slide down your thighs. “Making a mess,” you mumbled from where you were half-buried by the soft fur near his ear.

“Mmph.”

“If you’re expecting me to have put on enough muscle to chest press you off me, you’re sorely mistaken,” you quipped, and to your joy, he gave a delighted, gnollish giggle and lifted his head enough to regard you with his slightly unfocused, dark brown eyes.

“You’re really something,” he said, and he let his pink tongue just grace the tip of your nose. “You sore? You want me to run you a bath?”

“Oof, yes please,” you smiled. No one had ever offered to do that for you after sex, and you were indeed a little sore from where he’d stretched you further than anyone ever had.

He lifted himself off you carefully, withdrawing from you and giving a little grunt as his softening cock slid free. He sat back on his haunches and ran his thumbs over the curve of your thighs, staring at where you knew you were probably gaping a bit. It was hard not to feel embarrassment until he murmured, “You’re exquisite.”

Cade leaned over you and fondly raked his upper and lower teeth over the soft flesh of your thigh before laving his tongue over your skin and then finally standing on shaky legs. “Been a while since I came like that,” he admitted shyly as he staggered towards the door. “Think I might skip leg day tomorrow and just chill out here.”

“I’ll join you,” you said. “I may never regain feeling in my legs.”

“I’ll carry you around anyway,” he grinned as he left and went to run the bath.

True to his word, Cade did carry you around his apartment the next day, and your feet barely touched the ground from the moment you woke to the moment you fell asleep in his bed for the second night in a row.

You weren’t exactly complaining though. It was heaven.

__

I hope you enjoyed it, and I hope you’ll consider reblogging as well as leaving a like. Take care of yourselves, and I hope you have a lovely day/night wherever you are, and whenever you read this.

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[ghoulangerlee]

are you watching me with eyes of a predator ; swiss/ifrit

commissioned by @wrathofrats, this one got to be so out of control from what I originally planned but I do have to say I'm very happy with how it turned out haha.

7k of sloppy sex featuring newly summoned Swiss and Ifrit who's in charge of his surface acclimation.

content: wing/feather kink, Just The Tip, cunnilingus, Wet&Messy, multiple orgasms, vague play at Innocence kink, Ifrit-bimbofication, Swiss has a cunt in this one though he's not explicitly mentioned to be trans (cunt and clit and folds are used for his anatomy).

read it here on ao3!

fic under the read more:

The summoning chambers are always cold, mostly dark—the ceilings high and grand in a way that makes it feel less like a basement and more like a chapel. 

At least, that’s what Ifrit thinks as he stands off to the side, watching Cardinal Copia putter around the chamber, the circle is pristine and stark in the center of the room and each candle corresponding with the elemental symbol sits in its place—it's all too perfect really, so much different from the other summonings he’s been a part of.  

He’s only here to be part of the welcoming crew, as his place in the band had been dissolved, much to his own relief. There was an ache in him after Terzo’s death, something about going back on stage with a new face didn’t sit right with him, made him feel jumpy and nervous—he's not sure why, but he knew that once Cardinal Copia became part of it all, he’d need to step back. 

So, he did.  

But he’s been helping with a few behind the scenes things for now, practicing with Dew, who’s taken his spot in the band, working with Rain, the new water ghoul that Cardinal Copia had summoned—and while it wasn’t the exciting life that Terzo had promised him when he was first summoned, it was definitely different.  

The Cardinal is speaking, reciting Latin from a book he’s holding, chanting through stanzas of words as the circle on the floor starts to come to life—around them, the others are waiting with bated breath to see if the offering, if the request is enough to entice another ghoul forward.  

It can be tricky sometimes to find the ghouls who want to come to the surface, and while it's supposed to be voluntary, he knows that sometimes it’s not, and in the past, it had been such a big thing within the church.  

He likes to think that Cardinal Copia is on the right side of history these days, but it’s always hard to tell—he'd been summoned and promised so many things, only for his summoner to be murdered and his station in church be questioned by the very people who’d carried out the murder.  

There’s a hush in the room and Ifrit’s drawn back to the present in enough time to see a ghoul claw its way out of the portal—stark black skin and shining mismatched eyes, the ghoul has feathers but smells strongly of fire, of burning wood and ozone.  

Ifrit is almost immediately enamored.  

- 

His name is Swiss, at least, that’s what he settles on after the others gather round and toss out name suggestions—they all have names, but some of them are harder for humans to vocalize, most of them unable to properly speak Infernal in a way that’s understandable.  

It’s just easier to choose a new name, rather than be referred to as ghoul all the time (though this doesn’t discount the ghouls who do want to be called ghoul; it’s their prerogative, but Ifrit doesn’t like the way the word sits on a human tongue, sounding more like an insult than a name.). 

When Swiss grins at being called Swiss, Ifrit has to look away from that sharp yet bright smile, the sparkle in his eyes—one is a soft lavender color and the other a warm brown, because suddenly he wants to be the reason that Swiss is smiling.  

Cardinal Copia calls him forth and Ifrit goes, while the others are still fawning over Swiss, he ignores it in favor of focusing on the human, standing with his hands clasped behind his back in front of him.  

“I know you’re probably tired of this,” Cardinal Copia says with a wry sort of laugh, “But do you have the bandwidth to acclimate one more ghoul?”  

Ifrit grins, looks back at where Swiss is standing in a half-formed circle with the others, then back at the Cardinal, he shrugs, tries not to show his excitement at the prospect of it all, “I could move a few things around.”  

The worry lines on the Cardinals face seem to melt away and he smiles, reaches out and gently pats his gloved hand against Ifrit’s sleeve covered arm, “Thank you, I’ll make sure to requisition pay for this,” he says as a promise—and yeah, the money is good, but the idea of having a newly summoned hybrid ghoul almost outweighs it.  

Well. He’s getting a bit ahead of himself.  

“No worries, Cardinal. I know the song catalogue too; do you know what you’re going to have him do yet? We can work on that once we finish with the acclimation.” 

Cardinal Copia looks thoughtful, “I’ll need to think it over first, but I’ll let you know. If you could get him familiar with it all though, that’d be wonderful.” 

“No problem,” Ifrit says with a casual indifference that he’s somewhat proud of, “If there’s anything else just let me know. I’m going to go ahead and,” he breaks off, waving his hand in the direction of the other ghouls—they've got Swiss wrapped up in a cloak now, hood pulled over his head, but despite that, Ifrit can still see the glow of his eyes. “We’re going to head up to the den now if that’s alright with you.”  

(Expecting a newly summoned ghoul to glamour so soon can backfire sometimes, can be messy and horrifying if they’re not used to the surface, if their magic isn’t attuned to everything, if they’re without a proper pack—not that Swiss had been summoned packless, he’d been, by default, initiated the moment he accepted the offerings, but still, it was better safe than sorry.) 

The Cardinal pats Ifrit’s arm one more time before stepping back, “Yes, of course, thank you again. I’ll be in touch about the rest of it all. And you should expect payment within the next week. I trust that you’ll take care of him.”  

Ifrit smiles sickly sweet, “Of course, Cardinal, only the best care for the band ghouls.”  

-- 

Swiss is different, Ifrit learns as the two of them spend a lot of time together—almost immediately after the pack whisk him away out of the basement and up to the den, the tense line of his shoulders goes loose and the drops the hood down from over his head.  

He grins at Ifrit, cocking his head to the side—his tightly coiled curls bouncing with the movement of his head, “Didn’t realize there could be two fire ghouls in the band.”  

There’s something melodic and mesmerizing about his voice and Ifrit blinks a few times to clear the sudden fog in his mind, “There’s not,” he answers, “I’m not in the band, I just help with the administrative stuff.”  

Swiss cocks an eyebrow at him, “So I’m administrative stuff then?” he asks, shifting the cloak around his shoulders enough that the front of it opens just enough for Ifrit to get an eyeful of dark, bare skin; the flash of lavender further down.  

He clears his throat, “Acclimation falls under administrative,” he says, knowing how stupid he sounds as he says it, but unable to stop his mouth from continuing the thought, “I’m pretty good at it. Acclimating new ghouls to the surface.”  

“Oh?” Swiss asks, his eyes shining in amusement, tugging the front of the cloak together again, “Well, then I’m glad that I’m in your capable hands,” he purrs, stepping further into Ifrit’s space, “I’m sure you’ll teach me all about life on the surface.”  

He does, or he tries to, but Swiss is so distracting—on purpose it feels like.  

It takes Swiss several days to fully form his glamour, so he spends a good portion of the time before mostly nude; not uncommon because Rain had been completely nude for the first few weeks of him time here, but Ifrit hadn’t wanted to drag Rain to his bed in the same way that he wants Swiss there.  

And Swiss seems to know it too, if the way he preens whenever he catches Ifrit watching him, the way he seems to purposely run his fingers through the no doubt soft feathers that Ifrit can see peeking just above the waistband of the slacks he’s wearing.  

Unfortunately, Ifrit knows just how far those feathers go down as pants were a new thing for Swiss within the last day, now choosing to mostly walk around shirtless within the den—he’s less feathered below the belt, he’d explained, and every shirt he’d tried on thus far just felt constricting to his feathers.  

Again, everything was fine.  

He was sure that this was a very normal thing that air ghouls went through, he was summoned after Zephyr, so he hadn’t had a chance to see if this was just how they were on the surface or not, too focused on his own acclimation.  

He was sure that his own mind made things worse because of how attractive he found Swiss, because the others seemed less enamored by him, though no doubt just as friendly, like pack were. 

Like Ifrit should have been. 

Instead, he was here trying his best not to scare off Swiss—sex was a natural thing, as natural to them as breathing most of the time, their nature as ghouls meant they had less reservations about things than humans did so it should have been no problem, just bring it up to Swiss and then it’d be done.  

They could fuck about it and move on with the acclimation.  

But maybe, just maybe Ifrit had been around humans for too long and now he’s here, reconsidering everything; thinking about going to the Cardinal and letting him know that he’ll need to get someone else to help with the acclimation because he couldn’t do it with a clear head.  

Not when his baser instincts were nearly screaming at him to take Swiss to bed, to make him his.  

Maybe, if he could just ignore the voice inside his head, telling him that every little thing Swiss was doing was Swiss opening up to him, accepting him as some sort of sexual partner even though he hadn’t asked—well, if he could ignore it, then he wouldn’t feel so awful about the focus he was putting on trying to make sure Swiss understood what life on the surface was like instead of putting his focus on pack bonding.  

(If he focused too hard on Swiss and pack then his mind tended to get possessive. The urge to take Swiss and hide him away, the need to be the one to make Swiss smile, laugh, happy.) 

Swiss however, was no idiot.  

“You smell like you want to fuck,” Swiss says bluntly, head tilted as he corners Ifrit—he's taller, by only a few inches, taller, but not as broad as Ifrit, except when he’s got Ifrit backed up against the wall of the den, Ifrit feels small.  

Ifrit makes a noise, presses his hands flat against the wall, “Oh, it’s...almost time for. You know how ghoul biology works,” he says, though it's a flimsy excuse, about six months too early to really mean anything—the pulse of heat under his skin has nothing to do with anything other than the way Swiss is looking down at him.  

“Mmhm,” Swiss says, somewhat like he barely believes him and well, fair, even Ifrit barely believes the things he’s said. “I’m beginning to think you don’t like me all that much, firebird,” he plants a hand beside Ifrit’s head and leans down into his space, “But your scent tells me that you do like me and it’s very confusing.”  

That’s all fine and dandy because Ifrit is also confused.  

“I’m supposed to help you acclimate,” Ifrit says carefully, not wanting to reveal too much about himself or the entire situation, “Cardinal Copia asked me to do it because the others are preparing for the tour coming up, easier to delegate to the guy who’s not going on tour.”  

Swiss tilts his head, his mismatched eyes look bigger up close, shiny and wide as he stares into Ifrit’s eyes before leaning back, “I’ve been on the surface before,” he says slowly, “I...am almost certain I mentioned that before. I know how this whole thing works, just not the glamour bit cause I didn’t need one of those where I was last summoned.”  

Swiss may have mentioned it once, maybe twice, if Ifrit thinks about it too hard and pushes past the weird feelings he has around that, not that Swiss being summoned previously is a problem—it's actually the opposite of it, it’s something so grand that Ifrit almost wants to propose they fuck about this whole misunderstanding.  

(Is it really a misunderstanding if only Ifrit misunderstood?)  

“You’ve been really weird this whole time, you smell like you want me but then you shy away from touching me,” Swiss stares hard at Ifrit’s face, almost enough to make Ifrit squirm, “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you have some sort of weird thing about wanting to fuck me but not wanting to fuck me because I’m new.”  

It’s a little judgmental, his words, and Ifrit can’t help the stir of shame, the flood of arousal, he swallows heavily, works his jaw a few times trying to find the right words, “Well,” he says, “I just don’t want to come on too strong or anything.”  

Swiss laughs then, it’s a loud and boisterous sound and it fills Ifrit with warmth, “Too strong?” he asks, and then he reaches up, shuffles his fingers through his own hair, lower down towards the back of his neck, works something free—a feather, it’s soft purple on the ends, the color fading into a warm chocolate brown towards the base.  

Ifrit watches somewhat dumbly as Swiss brings the feather closer, drawing the tip of it against his cheek, down his jaw, ticking his throat, “I think when you figure out your little shame thing, you should come find me,” he whispers.  

He flushes, pale pink against his gray skin, eyes fluttering a little as Swiss drags the tip of the feather across his collarbones, “Maybe we can work something out,” he continues, speaking in a near whisper now as he finally straightens, pulls the feather away from Ifrit’s skin.  

“But you’ve got to be the one to make the first move, baby,” Swiss murmurs smoothly, reaching down to take Ifrit’s hand, rubbing his thumb against the center of his palm before he presses the feather into Ifrit’s hand, a clear sign of his intentions.  

“Too strong?” he asks as he takes a few steps back, a satisfied grin on his lips as he watches Ifrit for a moment. “You know where to find me, baby.”  

Before Ifrit’s able to form a proper sentence, Swiss is gone, melting into the shadows like some kind of apparition, leaving behind a feather and the lingering scent of burning wood and ozone.  

- 

It takes him decidedly less time to get over himself as Swiss had put it in not so many words, the feather held delicately between his fingers as he paced the length of the den, sure that if he were to walk any harder or any faster, he’d wear a hole in the stone.  

“Oh, he finally told you, huh?” Dew asks, coming into the den, carrying a basket of laundry, “We were wondering if you were ever going to catch on that he was trying to get your attention.” 

Ifrit stops walking, turns to look at Dew, who’s stopped by the door, watching him, “You knew?” he asked, “Why didn’t you say something?” 

Dew snorts softly and hefts the basket of laundry up higher on his hip, “What? And miss a chance to watch you fumble around? You were the one who decided to think too loud with your dick and ignore what Swiss was saying to you.”  

“I’ll admit that I’ve been handling him too carefully,” Ifrit says, only mildly insulted by Dew’s insinuation, “But, the last thing anyone needs is being accosted by the person helping them acclimate when they’re first summoned.”  

Unimpressed, Dew finally moves further into the room and places the laundry basket down on the couch, “Yeah, he made it very clear that first week that he wasn’t new to the surface, and one could argue that he made it clearer by accepting your advances, however unconscious those were,” he says, rolling his eyes. “Seriously though, and I mean this in the nicest way I can muster, you smell absolutely disgusting to me right now, will you please go take care of that so things can go vaguely back to normal.”  

It’s not a question and there’s an undercurrent of annoyance in Dew’s tone that Ifrit’s not too keen on pushing, “Yeah, sure, I was just thinking,” he holds the feather up, twirling it between his fingers, “I’ll get out of your hair, take care of everything and you’ve got nothing to worry about, big guy.”  

Dew levels him with another unimpressed stare, “Just go,” he says, “Satan help me, you’re the one acting like you’ve never bedded a new summon before.”   

A fair point that Ifrit doesn’t try to argue on, choosing instead to leave the communal den and to leave Dew to his chores, heart pounding as he heads down the hallway towards the separate dens each ghoul has—the whole time Dew’s words bounce around in his head.  

Accepting your advances.  

“Was I really that obtuse?” he asks himself out loud as he hurries further down the hallway until he comes to a stop in front of Swiss’s room.  

The door’s ajar, just slightly, and there’s low humming coming from inside.  

Ifrit pauses there with his hand raised to knock, biting his lower lip. He could knock, could push the door open and announce his presence—he could, but he stops for a moment, steps back and takes a deep breath.  

“You can come inside, you know,” Swiss’s voice calls out, amused, “I won’t bite unless you ask first.”  

He pushes the door open just enough to slip inside and closes it quietly behind him—Swiss's room smells strongly of the multi-ghoul and little else; the scent of smoldering wood permeates the area, filling Ifrit’s senses, calling to him; there’s an undercurrent of something fresh, the smell of open air on a sunny day.  

Swiss himself is lounging on the bed, blankets haphazard like he’d been sleeping; he’s wearing sweats and a cropped t-shirt, only glamoured enough that his wings aren’t visible, and Ifrit feels ravenous all of a sudden.  

“My eyes are up here, firebird,” Swiss says, amused, a grin stretching across his lips when Ifrit’s eyes meet his instead of where they’d been glued to his feathery happy trail.  

Ifrit’s mouth feels dry and there’s heat coursing through his veins, “I don’t have feathers,” he says, somewhat dumbly.  

Swiss pushes himself into a sitting position and reaches a hand out towards Ifrit, “You don’t,” he agrees easily, beckoning him forward with a finger, “Come here and I’ll show you mine.”  

A choked noise leaves Ifrit but he shuffles forward, letting himself come to a stop as his knees hit the foot of Swiss’s bed—not that he stays there for long, because Swiss is sitting up further, reaching out and fisting a hand in his shirt, dragging him up onto the bed with little to no preamble.  

“Dew said you had a thing for newly summoned ghouls and that once they’re acclimated, you like to invite them to bed with you,” Swiss murmurs in the space between them—this close, Ifrit can make out the specks of white and gold in Swiss’s brown eye, like constellations. “Probably threw you off that I’ve already been up here, huh?”  

“A little bit,” Ifrit agrees, his voice low as he plants a hand on the bed beside Swiss’s hip—he's so close to him, half leaning over him, “Doesn’t mean I’m any less interested though, if you’ll have me.”  

Swiss grins up at him, “I let you in here, didn’t I?” he asks, rhetorical, “I hope my experience isn’t off putting,” he murmurs then, tilting his head a little bit, lower lip brushing the curve of Ifrit’s in the barest hint of a kiss, “I can pretend to not know what your intentions are, let you show me what it’s like if that’s a deal breaker.”  

Ifrit snorts in amusement at Swiss’s words, though the idea is enticing in a way, he shakes his head and brushes their lips together, finally, properly. “We can compare notes,” he mumbles, “Can I see your feathers now?” he asks, ignoring the way his voice goes a bit airy towards the end, like he’s whining.  

A hum and Swiss’s hand comes up to the back of Ifrit’s neck, finally drawing him into something more than just a brush of lips—he's a little rough with it, a little bit overeager in the same way that Ifrit feels; sharp teeth catch on his lower lip for a moment before Ifrit’s opening his mouth, Swiss’s scent spiking up sharply as their tongues brush. 

The hand on the back of his neck squeezes and it draws a sharp moan from Ifrit, Swiss easily swallowing the noise as the kiss continues, as it deepens further—and it’s different, bedding a freshly summoned ghoul who knows what they’re doing, still smelling of brimstone and ozone, still so in tune with their own instincts without the interference of humanity.  

The kiss breaks and Ifrit’s immediately assaulted with the feeling of Swiss’s mouth on his jaw, down his throat, teeth sharp and dangerous against the delicate skin—the rush of it all makes Ifrit lightheaded. Swiss could easily incapacitate him if he wanted to, and Ifrit wouldn’t even try to stop him.  

“What are you thinking about?” Swiss mumbles, dragging the sharp point of his canine over where Ifrit’s pulse is beating heavily.  

Ifrit swallows thickly, eyes fluttering closed as he tilts his head back, bares his throat more, revels in the low, approving purr that comes from Swiss, “Thinking about you biting me,” he answers easily, breath hitching when Swiss fits his teeth against his throat, just pressing them there. “Shit, yeah, just like that.” he says, feeling nearly faint.  

There’s a rumble of a laugh and Swiss’s teeth press inward; the shock of pain draws a moan from Ifrit—he feels shaky and loose, grabs at Swiss’s shoulder with one hand to keep himself centered, “That’s it, pretty bird,” he slurs, shivers when Swiss pulls away and drags the flat of his tongue over the indentions left by his teeth. “Fuck.”  

“Who knew all I needed to do was get you in my bed for you to actually be normal around me,” Swiss mumbles, amused, and then he’s nudging Ifrit back onto his knees properly, so Ifrit’s kneeling in front of him on the bed. “It was cute watching you try to be careful though, all while smelling like you wanted to jump me.”  

Ifrit groans, brings both hands up to cover his face, “Can we not talk about that, I’m here, aren’t I?” he asks, his voice going whiny again, and Swiss takes pity on him, prying his hands away from his face to kiss him again.  

Somehow, at some point, they end up horizontal on the bed, side by side for now, sharing kisses, open mouthed and messy—Ifrit’s fingers find the shock of lavender feathers above the waistband of Swiss’s sweats, and he whimpers into the kiss as he drags his knuckles over them, the soft and downy feeling making him feel as if he’s going to burst.  

There’s a laugh, the sound pouring into his mouth right before Swiss pulls away from the kiss, pressing a closed mouth kiss against his lower lip, “You want to see more?” he asks softly, biting at his jaw again, “Wanna feel more?”  

Ifrit whimpers again and lets Swiss shove a leg between his thigh, giving him something to grind the hard line of his cock against, “Please,” he mumbles, begs as his other hand claws at the waistband of Swiss’s pants, “Let me see.”  

“You’re so hot when you’re like this,” Swiss says reverently, shifting forward to press Ifrit back into the bed, hovering over him, “Begging to get in my pants,” he coos, head tilted as he smiles down at Ifrit, “Never had some beg like this, for me,” he adds and then he’s pulling the cropped shirt off, tossing it aside, allowing Ifrit a moment to feel along the hard planes of his chest, his stomach, fingers immediately going back to his happy trail. 

He laughs then, “Oh baby, I think you’ve got a thing for my feathers,” he says, sitting back properly so he can shove his sweatpants down—there's nothing under them and Ifrit’s mouth waters as more skin, more feathers are revealed; they’re a little darker the further down they go, a bit curled and damp with Swiss’s arousal.  

Ifrit makes a punched-out sort of noise, hands grasping at Swiss’s hips in desperation—he wants to taste him, wants to get his mouth on Swiss’s cunt, bury himself there until he can’t breathe. 

“Can’t say I’ve ever made anyone speechless,” Swiss jokes, shifting around atop Ifrit until he’s able to properly kick off his sweatpants, laughing again when he’s suddenly being pulled forward until his thighs are spread wide over the width of Ifrit’s chest. “See something you like?” he asks, humming a little when Ifrit digs his fingers into the meat of his lower back, a clear sign of restraint.  

“These your feathers?” Ifrit asks, the words sticking heavily to his tongue as he lets go of Swiss’s hips and presses his thumbs into the patch of feathers framing his cunt, “You lure all the ghouls you sleep with into bed by flashing them?” 

Swiss shudders above him and Ifrit can feel the way his muscles move just under his skin, how they jump at the touch, the feathers ruffling, “Nope,” he says, his voice surprisingly steady, “You’re the first I’ve met that’s wanted them out.”  

Something about that makes something inside Ifrit preen, a first—and yeah, okay, he may like being the first at things sometimes, but even the knowledge that Swiss has slept with others in the past does nothing to quell his thoughts.  

Ifrit takes a moment to peer up at Swiss, his thumbs still carefully massaging into the feathers—Swiss is watching him with heavy eyes, the black of his pupil thin slits among the color of his irises before they expand and Swiss blinks down at him slowly, rolls his hips forward, trying to encourage more.  

Ifrit licks his lips and watches as Swiss’s eyes drop to his mouth, digging his knees into the bed for leverage as he rocks forward again, and Ifrit lets his thumbs inch closer to his core, where he can see the barest hint of dark pink nestled among the feathers.  

He lets out a sound, something incredulous, pressing a thumb inward and feeling as if Swiss himself had taken the air from his lungs, wanting nothing more than to fit his mouth over that pink nub, drink from him until Swiss is shaking and begging for it.  

When Swiss shifts his hips backwards, Ifrit curls his thumb into the soft, silky skin of his cunt, spreading his lips just enough to make his own want surge—he's so pink, he’s so pretty and Satan, he must say that out loud because Swiss makes a noise, jerks forward until Ifrit’s thumb slides right up into his clit, warm and wet and pulsing.  

There’s a flush on Swiss’s cheeks, a constellation of dusky pink and gold, coloring down his throat, towards his chest, his mouth is open, he’s panting, grinding his hips forward in a tight circle, all but manipulating his clit against the pad of Ifrit’s thumb.  

The color of his eyes swallowed up by the black of his pupils.  

“Up here,” Ifrit manages to get out, grips at one of Swiss’s thighs while pressing his thumb harder against Swiss, “Up, sit on my face,” he gets out, letting loose a tortured noise when Swiss scrambles further up, thighs bracketing right around Ifrit’s head as he settles down there.  

Swiss’s scent is thicker here, Ifrit’s nose pressed into the tuft of feathers right above his cunt—he takes a moment to breathe him in, grips both of Swiss’s thighs and pulls him down, and sure he’s eaten others out before, knows he’s got skills, an oral thing he’d been told by past partners, but he’s never had someone on his face with feathers.  

It’s not much different to the coarse hair, the scales or the other ghoulish traits he’s had previous experience with, but it makes him feel heady in a way that he can’t describe, the gentle tickle of feathers against his cheeks as he nudges Swiss’s lips apart, licking into him eagerly. 

Swiss’s hands immediately come to rest in his hair, one gripping the short strands tightly while the other cradles the side of his head; he’s moaning, a low and happy sort of thing as he grinds down onto Ifrit’s tongue, thighs spasming.  

Ifrit makes a noise, shifts his head so his nose nudges against Swiss’s clit, licks deeper into him wondering if this will be the first time Swiss has gotten off since being summoned this time; it’s always easy and quick the first time, getting someone to the edge, that is. The rearranging of their genetic makeup to exist on the surface doing something to them.  

It’s why he’s always keen to get a new summon in bed, to bring them to the edge over and over, a pleasant welcome to the surface.  

He wiggles a hand in between their bodies for a moment, uses his thumb to hold Swiss open as he works his jaw, presses his tongue in as far as he can get it—in times like these, he wishes he were the type of fire ghoul who could lengthen his tongue, he’s not though, but he manages; using his grip on Swiss’s thigh to hold the ghoul down against him.  

Swiss makes a noise in outrage, trying to break Ifrit’s hold on him, wanting to move, but Ifrit just holds him still, keeps him there as he takes his fill, and then he’s shifting his touch from holding Swiss open to drawing slow circles around his clit, his tongue doing something inside Swiss that has his thighs shaking around Ifrit’s head.  

And Swiss comes, of course he does, he can’t help it—can't help the way he tightens his grip on Ifrit’s hair and tries to drag his face closer, closer, closer (even though he’s as close as he can be without being inside Swiss), Ifrit’s name falls from his lips as he pulses through his orgasm, gasping almost painfully as Ifrit keeps licking and licking and licking at him until he’s shaking, coming again so suddenly that he makes a wounded noise and tries to shove Ifrit’s head away.  

Ifrit’s grip on his thigh loosens and Swiss shifts back and away from Ifrit, still shaking the slightest as he settles back onto the bed to catch his breath.  

Ifrit is, of course, grinning this satisfied sort of thing, the lower part of his face a mess of slick; his eyes are glowing as he looks at Swiss—and he’s hard in his pants, a fact that doesn’t go unnoticed by Swiss.  

“Insatiable,” Is the first thing he’s able to say once he’s caught his breath, splay-legged and lying beside Ifrit, “Absolutely disgusting.”  

Ifrit laughs at that and rolls onto his side, bullying his way close to Swiss, throwing an arm over his waist and nuzzling into his jaw, rubbing the scent of Swiss’s slick and Ifrit’s own pheromones into Swiss’s feathers, matting them down and making the two of them reek of each other. “Didn’t hear you complaining,” he murmurs, mouths at Swiss’s jaw for a moment before pulling back to look at him properly.  

Swiss turns his head, peering up at Ifrit with his mismatched eyes; watching him for a long moment before he smiles, something small and secretive, “Sounds like you’re fishing for a compliment,” he says, and then he’s reaching up, cupping the back of Ifrit’s neck with one of his hands—big and warm against his already overheated skin, dragging him down into a kiss that tastes like the two of them.  

Ifrit’s the one who separates them first, panting softly against Swiss’s mouth as he does it, “Not fishing,” he mumbles, presses another kiss to Swiss’s lips, “But I wouldn’t say no to a compliment if you have one.”  

“Of course,” Swiss says with a laugh, scratching his nails through the short hairs at the base of Ifrit’s neck, “You do have quite the mouth on you,” he adds after a moment, leaning in and biting at Ifrit’s lower lip, leaving behind the barest hint of teeth marks.  

A moan, low and pleased, both from the bite and the compliment, it’s praise to him, knowing he was able to satisfy Swiss with just his mouth does things to his brain, makes him feel a little floaty and happy, makes him want to do more and draw more praise from Swiss’s lips.  

Content to lie there while Swiss comes down, he nearly forgets about his own need until he feels Swiss’s hand tug at the buttons on his pants, “If you’re the type to not need reciprocation, let me know now,” Swiss is mumbling, “But I really want to touch you, been thinking about getting my hand around this from the beginning.”  

“Beginning?” Ifrit asks, shifting back so he can help Swiss get his pants undone and pushed down, “Shit, no, no, please, you can do whatever you want to my baby, I’m real easy.”  

Swiss hums softly, pleased and happy as he gets Ifrit almost fully nude, “Shirt goes too,” he says, shifting to push Ifrit onto his back again, hands pushing the material up until Ifrit’s able to get it off, “And yes, the beginning. Do you think I just show my feathers to anyone?” he asks, incredulously before he’s climbing into Ifrit’s lap, settling across his thighs. “You really are out of practice with how air ghouls show they’re interested, huh?”  

Ifrit feels a bit dumb as Swiss settles his weight down on him, he can feel the heat coming from Swiss’s cunt again, hovering so precariously close where he’s hard and curled up against his belly, “Oh,” he says, and then he laughs about it, because he can’t believe he’d been blind to it, the first flash of lavender, the suggestive tilt of his mouth, “Now I feel a bit silly,” he manages to say as his hands go to cradle Swiss’s hips.  

There’s a sly sort of grin on Swiss’s mouth, the corners curling upwards, the points of his teeth pressing into his lower lip as he presses his knees into the bed for leverage, moving from his perch on Ifrit’s thighs, “You are kind of dumb,” Swiss says as he settles his weight on Ifrit’s lower belly, cunt right over his cock, “But in that really endearing way. Chivalrous and concerned about my wellbeing all while denying yourself something you really wanted.”  

Ifrit gasps at the sudden weight on his belly, at Swiss’s heat right where he’s hard and sensitive, “Oh Satan,” he says, digging his fingertips into Swiss’s hips, “Yeah, fuck, baby, I’ll be as dumb as you want me to be if you keep doing what you’re about to do.”  

Swiss laughs at him, leaning down to kiss him quiet as he rocks his hips, slow and steady, reaching down between them long enough to spread himself, choking back his own moan when Ifrit’s cock slips right between his folds, hot and hard and right against his clit with each thrust forward.  

At some point, Ifrit pulls away from the kiss, tossing his head back as he holds Swiss down against him, digging his heels into the bed and letting himself get lost in the slick heat he’s grinding against—he almost misses it, when Swiss shifts a little bit more, bends over him properly and right against his ear, murmurs, “Wanna put it in me?”  

Ifrit moans, loud and unbidden, hips stuttering a bit as he tries not to come, he’s nodding trying to tug Swiss onto his cock, feels it slip down just a bit, nudging against where Swiss is wet and open and warm, and he makes a sort of pained noise when Swiss lifts up so suddenly and they’re not touching anymore.  

“Just the tip,” Swiss says, firm, there’s a teasing grin on his face as he says it, hovering over Ifrit, “Do you think you can do that? Only the tip baby, don’t think I can take the whole thing yet,” he lowers his voice, pitches it in a way that ties knots in Ifrit’s stomach. “S’my first time, after all.”  

He nods, several times, mouth open in shock—it's not Swiss’s first time, something that he’d made very clear from the beginning, but hell the implications of it, the way Swiss plays into it has Ifrit all frazzled, “Baby,” he says, managing to find his words after a moment, “I’ll take such good care of you. Let you control what you take, how much.”  

Swiss makes a happy little trill in the back of his throat, settles back down over Ifrit’s cock, rocks his hips in slow circles for a few moments, “You’ll have to teach me how to take all of you,” he murmurs, still in that faux innocent tone, and this time, when he lifts up, it’s so he can reach down between them, “’m so wet, I can take you without any prep,” he continues, wrapping a hand around Ifrit’s cock with one hand and Ifrit has to watch, eyes trained on the feathers, on the part of his cunt, the dusky pink of his hole as he shifts back on his heels, guiding Ifrit’s cock into him.  

Ifrit’s sure he passes out, his grip on Swiss’s hips so tight he’s pretty sure there’ll be bruises there, indents of his fingertips left behind, he’s only coherent enough to not let his claws pop, though he’s sure Swiss would have no problem with that—Swiss's cunt is so tight, so warm, squeezing around him like he’s trying to milk him, like he wants more.  

“Oh,” Swiss says, high and breathless, stills and just lets Ifrit stay inside, “You feel so good,” he praises, “So big, s’not that much in me but I can feel you stretching me, gonna take a lot of practice to get you all the way in here.”  

Ifrit finds himself purring, something he doesn’t do often, but the rumble starts low in his chest as he slowly but surely loosens his grip on Swiss’s hips, instead, running his palms up Swiss’s sides, “We’ve got time, baby,” he says, hoping his voice is steady, “Can take as long as we need. Can do it as many times as you want. Could spend hours stretching you out for me.”  

Swiss smiles down at him, shifts his hips a little bit after another few minutes, clenching around the tip before he grinds backwards, fucking himself on just a couple inches of Ifrit’s cock, moaning low and happily in his throat as he does, “You feel so good,” he finds himself repeating as Ifrit drags him down into a kiss.  

They kiss for a while, open mouthed and panting as Swiss works himself on Ifrit, almost as if he were trying to chase his own orgasm and not worry about Ifrit’s--and well, that thought does a lot more to him that he realizes, hazy and hot and cunt drunk as he is.  

It’s why when he feels himself nearing the edge, he’s barely able to get out a warning, the slide of Swiss’s cunt against his cock and then the way he sinks the tip into him every few thrusts—he doesn’t know the proper thing to do here, if he should make an effort to not come inside Swiss or if he should—how far does showing ones feathers go when it comes to sex?  

He’s thinking, probably way too much about this, so when Swiss sinks down onto the tip of his cock one more time, he’s surprised when Swiss just stays there, his own answering purrs much lower than Ifrit’s rumbling deep in his chest, he grinds a little, another inch slips into him and Swiss clenches around him so suddenly it draws his orgasm out of him with very little warning.  

Ifrit grasps at Swiss, only at the last second not pulling him down any further, so instead he curls his upper body upwards, pressing his face into Swiss’s heaving chest, shaking under him as he empties inside Swiss—all the while Swiss is milking him again, clenching rhythmically around him until Ifrit’s making soft little uh, uh, uh noises against Swiss’s skin, shivering at how it starts to tip over into the too much territory.  

When he slips out of Swiss, spent and softening, Ifrit barely thinks as he grabs at Swiss’s thighs and hauls him upwards, mouth open, tongue out, hoping to catch the leak of his own come out of Swiss’s cunt before any of it gets on the sheets under them.  

Swiss has a hand in his hair again and this time, Ifrit lets Swiss fuck down onto his face, riding his tongue, letting Ifrit lick his own come out of him until he’s arching, his own hand coming down to rub at his clit only a few times before he’s spasming around Ifrit’s tongue, coming in such an explosive manner than Ifrit’s sure he’s going to be tasting him for days now.  

Which, good.  

Good.  

Swiss slips off of him this time, curling on his side and pressing his face into the side of Ifrit’s neck, panting heavily as he does so—Ifrit wraps an arm around Swiss and holds him close, holding him through the aftershocks and murmuring softly into his temple.  

When Swiss is only mildly coherent, he lifts his head enough to share a kiss, moans at the taste of himself and Ifrit on the fire ghoul’s tongue, before he pulls away and hides away in Ifrit’s neck again—and while Ifrit wants to ask him if it was good again, the tease on the tip of his tongue, he holds back.  

He waits, patiently.  

“Disgusting,” Swiss mumbles into Ifrit’s neck this time, slurring just a little, “Absolutely filthy, disgusting ghoul. You should be ashamed of yourself.”  

Ifrit laughs at his words, can hear the undercurrent of humor, the hint of awe—it's a compliment and he takes it as one, rolling them until he can properly cuddle Swiss, letting his warmth seep into Swiss’s skin as the cold chill of the room starts to settle over them now that they’re basking.  

“That tongue thing you do should be illegal,” Swiss mumbles with a shake of his head. “I’m fucking inconsolable, right now.”  

Ifrit glances down at the top of Swiss’s head, quirks an eyebrow, “You okay?” he asks, a little hesitant, but mostly amused.  

When Swiss lifts his head, he looks exasperated, a little hazy eyed, sated, “You fuck, I want to go again,” he says, “I’m so fucking sloppy right now but I just want more.”  

That draws another laugh out of Ifrit, surprised and pleased that he’s good and makes Swiss feel insatiable, “Well, if you’re done being in charge, maybe let me take care of you this time?” he asks, rolling Swiss onto his back, looming over him with a glint in his eyes, “Let me make you feel good.”  

Swiss covers his eyes with his forearm, lets Ifrit bully his way between his legs properly until he’s got one of them up over Ifrit’s shoulder his cunt spread and exposed—but he’s grinning, biting his lower lip, “Fuck, yeah, yeah, okay, do your worst. Make me feel good, firebird.”  

Ifrit makes good on his word, keeps Swiss in bed for the rest of the day, pulling orgasm after orgasm out of him until they’re both too tired to continue.  

[gretavanbear]

Different Worlds [REPOST]

Jake Kiszka x Fem!Reader

NSFW! MDNI 18+ WORK.

30.5k words.

[a/n : before you read this, i want you to know this is my first ever fanfic I've written. it is not the best writing, and it needs a lot of work that someday I will re-do. i am not very proud of this one. my writing has definitely improved, but a lovely anon requested for me to repost this. thank you.]

Synopsis: You’re the intern for a music company and you end up working for Greta Van Fleet.

Chapter 1: First Day

Stepping into the elevator, I press ‘49’. The elevator owned large mirrors on each wall, exposing me from every angle. I examined each hair out of place, my pupils were enlarged like a deer in headlights. My outfit consisted of two different shades of black, which caused self-consciousness to swarm my thoughts as I did not want to appear unprofessional. There was no music playing, only my rapid heartbeat. The sound of the doors opening snapped me out of my thoughts as I watched how calm this floor seemed. There were big windows that exposed the beautiful city below, the sun shined onto the beautiful marble floor of the gigantic open office. 

“You must be [y/n]!” A tall blonde woman stood in front of me, she had beautiful soft features and a small button nose, a nice smile and big blue eyes. I nodded and placed my hand out to shake. 

“We don’t really shake here, that’s a tad too formal, I’m Elizabeth.” She smiled. 

“I’m [y/n]. It’s nice to meet you Elizabeth. I’m so excited to be here.” I replied. 

“Your energy is like” she paused, scanning me up and down with her eyes. “perfect for this place” She finished. A wave of relief travelled its way through my chest as I smiled, my cheeks burning up.

She started walking to her right, asking me to follow her, so I did. 

She led me to her office, it was beautiful. Her desk was black and so were all of her chairs and couches, it was a very large office that encapsulated sophistication and modernism. She sat down in the corner of her large L-shaped couch and pat the seat next to her, I sat two seats away. 

“Listen, [y/n], I know it’s your first day but time never stops around here. I have a meeting in about ten minutes and I’d love for you to sit in and see how it all goes. Take notes and observe, and if they ask for anything like water or coffee feel free to bring it to them.” She explained. Her eyes offered kindness and sympathy. 

“I know how first days go, don’t worry they’re super nice.” She smiled. 

They? I guess her first meeting is with a band. Our meeting. Fifteen minutes pass by until we hear a knock at the door. Elizabeth was now seated at her desk, she got up and sat at the oval table in the corner of her office, pulling out a chair for me to sit next to her. “Come in!” she exclaimed loudly.

“Hey, Liz!” A tall, curly-headed man walked in, he wore a dark brown button-down shirt with loose pants. He had a nice smile. Behind him walked two men with long hair, brown eyes and slim figures. 

“Hey Josh, Sam, Daniel.” Elizabeth greeted them as they walked up to the table and sat down. “Where’s Jake?” She added. I was surprised that this wasn’t the whole group. 

“We closed the elevator doors before he could come in with us.” Josh, the curly-headed man said with a big smile.

“Oh come on” Elizabeth sighed, then smiled as she looked up from Josh’s head to her door. 

“I’m sorry Liz, I was left behind. ” A soft voice spoke from the entryway, I turned my head and looked up. The tall brown-eyed man with soft features smiled shyly at Elizabeth. He wore a button-down shirt, exposing half his chest, paired with skinny black jeans and really old vans shoes. They probably used to be white but they looked really old. He looked at me quickly and then sat down, avoiding eye contact. 

“So, I think you guys must be confused as to why I requested to meet with you all.” Elizabeth began. “First of all, this is [y/n], she’s my intern but she’s also at your assistance for anything you need. Now, onto business…” She introduced me to them and then introduced them to me, then explained how the band will be announcing a small tour in the next coming weeks and they’ve set up a studio for them in the building a couple of floors up. Elizabeth seemed like a very organized woman, her office was dust-less, and she looked very well composed with her hair in a bun- tightly slicked back. She wore a white t-shirt with black wide-leg flowy pants and black Doc Martens. She didn’t seem nervous when speaking to these guys, who also did not seem nervous. I took notes of how she delivered the news to them and highlighted the key points of the meeting, so next time I know how they go. While my pen scribbled all over the page, I could feel someone looking at me but I decided to focus on the notes since I get distracted so easily. 

The room filled with excitement as the boys learnt the news about their tour and studio. I looked at Jake, who had happened to sit directly in front of me. He kept his lips stuck together, looking down at his hands while his bandmates chatted with Elizabeth. His long brown hair hugged his frame so perfectly, even though he was tall and fit, he seemed so soft and calm. Looking at him and his bandmates, they seem like an indie band or maybe a soft indie genre. Jake had calm energy around him that could make anyone feel at ease, like a soft breeze on a fall day or the feeling of the sun beaming down on your skin. 

“Alright guys, I’m not going to keep you guys cooped up in here much longer, lets go check out the studio!” Elizabeth clapped happily. The boys rapidly got up, mirroring Elizabeth’s excitement. We all walked out as a group towards the elevator from earlier. 

“So, [y/n], looks like you’re stuck with us” Josh said as he looked down at me. His brown eyes watched attentively for my response. 

“More like you’re stuck with me” I replied, matching Josh’s energy. He smiled and laughed at my response. We all turned our heads towards the elevator as it dinged, alerting us it has arrived. I let them all enter the elevator, waiting for my turn but when I was about to enter I hear the rapid noise of clicking. Sam was pressing the 'close door’ button over and over. 

“It’s the 65th floor! Sam st-” I hear Elizabeth before the doors shut in front of my face. I feel myself burning up and tears welling up in my eyes out of embarrassment. I was already so nervous about today and this didn’t help the feeling. I hear someone next to me clear their throat and press the 'up’ button for the elevator. Jake. I looked up at him and he gave me a small closed-mouth smile but he didn’t look back at me. 

“They always do that,” He said softly, barely above a whisper. “Don’t worry about it.” He added, even softer even though it didn’t feel possible.

I nodded slowly in response to him. He was taller than me, like Josh, but his presence felt bigger than mine. The elevator door opened and we walked in, he let me in first. We both went to press the '65’ button, I let him do it. He turned to me after pressing the button and looked at me up and down, his eyes taking me all in. 

“You’re so nervous” He spoke softly as he stepped closer, towering over me. The elevator felt small as all I could feel was the heat radiating from his body, all I could do was accept him and let him take over. His brown eyes looked deeply into mine, and his hair fell so perfectly next to his cheeks, it looked insanely soft and I wished I could touch it. 

“You shouldn’t be” He added, as he stepped back and the elevator doors opened. He walked out onto the floor, which pointed straight to the studio. I breathed out after realizing I had held my breath the whole time, my heartbeat consuming the now cold air of the elevator. I felt fuzzy and out of it, almost as if Jake had possessed something from me that I would not be able to get back.

Chapter 2 : Studio

When we walked into the studio room, there was a huge soundboard ahead of us. A tall man sat in front of it on his phone. Elizabeth smiled and turned around to face Jake and I as we walked in, clapping softly as a sign of congratulation for finding the room. Now that I’ve experienced Elizabeth, I don’t feel as nervous around her, she seems so down to earth and ‘go with the flow’. 

“Wow, Liz, this is amazing” Jake said. He looked around to catch it all in. 

The room with the soundboard faced another room through a large window with a huge room full of instruments, microphones, piano and multiple guitars. There was a big brown couch that took over the whole back wall of the room. The walls were coated a beautiful burgundy red and the ceiling was black, there was a sign above the door to enter that said 'RECORDING’, it seemed to be able to light up when needed. I watched the boys as they spoke with each other, their eyes full of excitement warmed my heart as I thought of how hard it must’ve been for them to get to this moment. In the studio of a large building owned by a large company. The boy’s excitement took over the room soon as Elizabeth offered for them to try it out for the very first time. 

“I’ve been with them since the beginning.” Elizabeth told me as they entered the studio and set up their instruments. 

“They’re very lucky to have you” I smiled at her. Her eyes gave me a look of appreciation as we heard the sound of a guitar being tuned in the background. I felt excitement towards seeing how this band is about to perform.

I was taken aback once the loud sound of electric guitar took over the room, my eyes searched for the cause and they landed on Jake. His fingers danced so smoothly on the strings, his eyes closed as if he was picturing the chords in his head. He played flawlessly as if he had been playing since he was born. I stared in awe at his flawless technique. He had his mouth open, almost mouthing each chord he was playing. 

“Well, you’re so pretty and I love you so, You know I’m your biggest fan I saw your picture and it’s the best, The finest in the land" 

Josh sang with such a beautiful voice, I felt my heart flutter out of pure excitement, awe, and nervousness. I watched them all play and sing, but especially Jake. He was so into the song. He was… sexy and I couldn’t take my eyes off of him until the song was over. Elizabeth and I clapped loudly and cheered for them. I looked at the group and they were all smiling as if it was the first time they played in a studio. I was taken aback by Josh’s voice, not expecting him to be able to hit such high notes from how he talked normally.

"I cannot wait to see all the cool shit we’ll do in here!” Josh exclaimed loudly. 

- - - 

Once I got home after my first day, I decided to look up 'Greta Van Fleet’ to learn more about them. They were pretty well known, from Michigan, 3 brothers. That’s why they look so alike. My cursor made it’s way to 'members’ and clicked Jake. I wanted to know everything, or maybe just look at him some more. He was so… beautiful. In all the pictures of him playing his guitar, it was like a magical sight. I watched a couple videos, they showed the whole band but I was focused on Jake the whole time. His fingers dance so gracefully on the guitar strings as if he’s been doing it forever, the music moved through his body so mesmerizingly. Snapping back to reality, I wipe the drool off my face and shut my computer off. 

_ _ _ 

I walked into the office, it was late and everyone had gone home. I wanted to look over my notes on my work computer, granted by the company and make sure I was prepared for my day tomorrow. I had been scrolling through everything for a couple minutes now, so captivated by my notes that I hadn’t noticed someone behind me.

“Working late I see.” His voice was low, barely above a whisper. The office was so quiet, the only sound breaking the silence is our breaths.

“Oh.. Hi Jake. Um, yeah I wanted to be prepared for tomorrow.” I reply, my voice barely above a whisper too. Almost as if I was afraid that my voice would scare him away.

“Are you really busy?” He asks softly. The only light allowing me to make eye contact with him was coming from the computer- all the other lights were off.

“Not really.. just reviewing my notes.” I reply, giving him a soft smile. 

“I was going to the studio, I had a riff I wanted to practice and I’d love some feedback.” He responds, offering a soft smile in return. I agree to go with him. 

Jake sits on a stool in the middle of the room, I’m sat in the left corner, the door is behind me to my right. He’s about six feet away from me, and all I can do is watch how his hair falls so perfectly, how his eyelashes curl so beautifully. I watch him as he prepares himself to play- making sure the guitar is plugged in and positioned right. Right before pressing his fingers against the guitar strings, he looks up and makes eye contact; his brown orbs capturing my nervous aura. His eyes stare me down as if he’s tearing me apart, making me afraid to breathe out. 

And suddenly he plays flawlessly. I don’t know which song because I haven’t listened to their discography but it was powerful and beautiful. I close my eyes to feel the notes, they tickle my skin and I feel my heart beating faster- almost matching the beat. I can hear him strumming the strings, almost aggressively as he’s playing so… fast. Sadly, his riff ends and he stops, slowly, then looks up at me. 

“So, what do you think?” He asks, waiting for my answer as if he isn’t a guitar god. As if he hasn’t played in front of millions of people. As if my opinion mattered.

“C'mon don’t keep me waiting…” He adds, with a small smile on his lips. 

“Sorry. Jake,” I shake my head quickly- snapping out of it. “That was beautiful. You’re so talented. I’ve never seen someone play like that. It- It’s like the music is in you or something and it travels as you play I don’t know.” I add, embarrassingly rambling. 

He smiles, with his eyes glowing and sunshine beaming out of him. Almost like this was the first time someone ever complimented him. I know it wasn’t, but I felt so special in those few seconds. He sets the guitar down on the stand next to the stool and turns towards me, scooting a bit closer. Maybe about two or three feet away. He was so close, our knees almost touching. His eyes meeting mine as he tucks the hair on the right side of his face behind his ear. 

“There’s something about you, [y/n], I don’t know I can’t put my finger on it. You’re just… captivating.” He says softly. “I just want to know you, to know what goes on in that pretty mind of yours." 

I feel my cheeks burn. Everything burn. My heartbeat loudly beats through my ears, I feel stuck in time and unable to move. 

He scoots closer. Our knees are touching. My legs are closed as his knees wrap around me in a V shape, I am trapped in his enclosure and I don’t want to escape. I want him to trap me and never let me escape. 

"Thank- Thank you” I can barely speak above a whisper. All I smell is Jake. All I feel is Jake. All I want to feel is Jake. 

“You’re so beautiful.” He says softly, I wonder if he senses how nervous I am, how much I want him. His hand slowly reaches for my left hand, and holds it between his two hands. 

I can barely thank him; he stands up and pushes the stool back with his leg. I stand up in response, mirroring his behaviour. A slow, sinking feeling appears in my stomach.

'He wants to leave, so get out of his way.’ I think, and I move out of his way, backing up into the corner of the room, leaving some space for him to reach for the door. But all he does is meet me in the corner. He lets go of my hand and looks down at me. A small frown forms on his face. 

“You want to leave, pretty girl?” He whispers, I feel him all over me, the warmth of his body radiates onto mine. 

“No.. sorry.. I thought you wante-" 

His lips reach mine. They’re soft and warm, like coming home after a cold day outside and hot cocoa is on the table. He pulls back, but only for a slight moment. I don’t want to be anywhere else than here, in this moment, between him and this wall. He leans in again and his lips radiate so much passion I feel almost overwhelmed. His tongue travels its way to my bottom lip, almost asking for an entrance. He bites it softly, as if he wanted a taste. I let him. Fuck, I’d let him do anything right now. Our tongues battle for a couple seconds, then he pulls back suddenly- breathing out hard and fast. 

"Fuck, [y/n], I’m sorry. I needed to know. I-” He says quickly, but I cut him off. 

“You can find out anything you want right now.” I feel almost shocked at my straightforwardness. I was the girl that sat in the back of the classroom reading my books, no one ever noticed me like this before. Not until now. I wanted to feel everything, I wanted to take this opportunity.

Chapter 3 : Sweetness

“I- [y/n]. I don’t do this sort of thing. Not usually. It’s something about you. I.. want you. So bad. Ever since I first saw you. I feel this sort of.. magnetic pull- I just- need you.” He rambles. His cheeks turn red. 

“Then have me.” I reply, in complete shock at my words. His eyes glimmer in the dimmed lighting of the studio. I realize at this moment that we had not opened all the lights.

His eyes take me in, all over. I feel the magnetic pull too, I could never admit it to him. He takes my hand and leads me to the couch. 

He sits down, and pats his lap with a small smile as he looks up. I can’t help but check him out quickly. He has such a sexy physique, strong arms and thick thighs. I hesitate slightly but climb over him, straddling his lap. I sit back a bit, giving us a bit of distance, and he stares at me, so deep I feel him almost in my soul. His hand reaches my cheek and he pulls me in for a slow kiss. He’s an amazing kisser, he knows exactly what he’s doing. His other hand makes its way to the middle of my back, caressing it slowly. I want him so bad in this moment. I feel his thighs and how hard they are under me, almost as if he’s flexing them. I wonder if he’s as nervous as I am. 

“I- I like you, you know?” I whisper quickly between kisses. 

“I like you, sweetness.” He replies, pulling me back in. 

His hand that was on my cheek is now with his other hand on my back, he’s holding me so sweetly. It just makes me want him even more. I need him. And so I grab his hands, slowly, and bring them down to my ass. He wastes no time in grabbing and pulling me closer. He groans softly against my lips, which makes me want him so much more. I feel him under me, brushing against me. I feel my nipples harden and brush against the soft material of my shirt. His hands grab me so hard and it feels like I belong to him. Right now, I would do anything for him. I feel one of them make it’s way to my back again, this time under my shirt. I stick out my chest a bit, and he notices. 

“What does that mean?” He whispers, a small smirk planted on his lips. 

“I think you know.” I reply. His hand makes its way to my right breast. His finger dances around my nipple, teasing me and I whimper a bit. He notices and I feel him get harder under me, if that was even possible. Grabbing my breast, his thumb rubs my nipple and I moan slightly. He makes use of his other hand to pull my shirt up, exposing me as his mouth makes its way to my nipple. 

“Fuck, Jake, oh my god” I whimper quietly as his tongue swirls around my nipple. It feels so good, and I subconsciously, almost naturally, start rocking my hips back and forth on him. He moans into me, his cheeks red. I feel the warmth of his face against me. He’s so hard under me and my stomach is doing backflips at this point. Rocking back and forth harder now, he’s moaning softly. His head rests against the back of the couch, face fully exposed- as if he wants me to watch him like this. I watch his lips, his furrowed brows, his eyes shut tightly just allowing himself to feel everything. Taking in my body against his, my weight pressing down on his hard cock. His hands on my breasts, fingers rubbing my nipples so perfectly. I feel like I’m his guitar and he’s playing all the right notes. I stop him for a moment, and he looks up at me with a worried look. I give him a small smile as I back up and get on my knees in front of him, he spreads his legs so I have space. My fingers make their way to his belt, unbuckling it slowly. I rub my hand against his length through his pants. He’s looking down at me, his bottom lip between his teeth, the anticipation building up all over his body. I know he feels it because I do too. 

I slowly unzip his pants and he gets up slightly to pull his pants down- exposing his big length through his boxers. As I go to reach inside, he places his hand on top of mine. He gives me a sort of ‘are you sure?’ kind of look. I nod as I pull his dick out of his boxers. His breath hitches at the skin to skin contact. It feels warm and strong under my grasp. I stroke him for a couple of seconds, then rub my thumb against the tip of his pulsating cock. This drives him crazy. 

“Oh- Oh my- [y/n] please do that again, pretty please, princess.” He begs, as he looks down at me- his eyes pleading like a little puppy. His lip almost quivering as he begs for it. I do it again, but this time with my tongue. I imagine how it must feel for him, to have my mouth wrapped around his cock like this. I stroke him as I keep the tip in my mouth, twirling my tongue around it while driving him crazy. His moans only get louder and louder, as he approaches his breaking point.

“[y/n], baby, I- I’m going to-” He can barely get any words out, because I’m going faster and harder. I don’t care if he cums in my mouth I just want him so bad, so much. I’ll gladly swallow his load. And so he climaxes into my mouth, whilst making the most beautiful sound I have ever heard. Better than the riff he played for me earlier. I swallow him instantly, sucking him dry, not wanting to miss a drop. He exhales so quick and hard, as if he just ran a marathon.

“We haven’t even had a full conversation and you just came in my mouth” I joke. He smiles, in between breaths. He looks down at me, still on my knees I gaze up at him. All he does is rub my cheek and then the back of my neck, leaning in to kiss my forehead.

“It’s your turn to come in my mouth.” He whispers against my forehead. My breath hitches at his comment.

“We’ll see about that.” I respond, quickly getting up. I don’t give him time to process. He starts to get up but by that time I’m out the door.

“[y/n] ! Wait!” He rushes out after me. I’m in the elevator as he reaches for me, holding the door open with his arm. I look at his bicep quickly, he’s flexing and it’s so incredibly sexy.

“Did I do something wrong?” He asks softly. I shake my head 'no’. “Then what’s wrong? Tell me, darling” He pleads. His arm is now at his side, as he stands in front of me, he reaches for my hand but the doors start to close.

“No one.. no one has ever touched me.” I respond, “I’ve never been touched until now.” I add, and the doors close.

Chapter 4 : Photoshoot

“Good morning, [y/n]!” Elizabeth beams as I step into her office. She had her hair down today, and she wore a big chunky cardigan which looked extremely soft. I greeted her in return and sat down at her desk with her. 

“So, today we’re gonna walk around with the boys for some pictures, I thought it’d be some good promo! I found the perfect spot for some really nice pictures” She smiles and clasps her hands together. 

“That’s a good idea! What would you like for me to do?” I ask, waiting to hear my tasks for the day. 

“Alright, so I know this isn’t your job technically, but I wanted to try something for funsies today. There’s this app called ‘TikTok’ where you basically take short videos and people can share them and react to them and stuff and I thought the fans would appreciate some content of the boys! We already set up the account and everything, you’d basically just have to take some videos of them” She smiles. 

“Oh! I love TikTok” I respond. “I’d love to do that! Sounds fun” I smile.

“Yes! I’m glad you’re familiar with the app! So we’re meeting the guys at the location later today, until then I can give you some paperwork and photocopies I’d need you to do?” She asks. I nod happily and do the work assigned to me. 

_ _ _ 

I step out of Elizabeth’s car and am greeted by a sign for a national park. It was beautiful, it reminded me of the Banff national park. There was a huge lake and a little dock for people to stand on. The park was empty, I figured Elizabeth got to reserve it for a couple hours. There was a girl there with a big camera in her hands, the strap around her neck, she waved at Elizabeth and walked over to greet us. 

“Hi Liz!” She said, smiling. Liz and the photographer chatted quietly as I took in the beauty of the park. I pulled out my phone to take a couple pictures. I then hear the sounds of tires rolling on gravel, I turn around and am met with a black jeep. Out comes the 4 boys were all here for. I look at Jake first. It had been a week since our last encounter. I hadn’t seen him since, only the rest of the band. He makes direct eye contact with me, not wasting any time with looking at the scenery behind me. He wore a black button down, unbuttoned until the middle of his chest. His skin looked so soft. He had dark grey pants and his dirty vans again. His hair loose yet held back by some sunglasses. His energy radiated onto me, he was so cool and I felt incredibly intimidated. He finally breaks the eye contact and takes in the view, I step away from his general direction and greet the band as a whole. I feel butterflies swarming my stomach as my mind races back to our last encounter. I shake my head quickly- hoping the thought makes it’s way out of my head for now.

“The newbie is here!” Josh exclaims. I nod awkwardly. “Ready to be thrown into the lake aren’t ya” He adds and Samuel laughs at his comment, the ice shaking in his iced coffee. 

“Josh I’m gonna start giving you the wrong time so you actually arrive on time. What’s your excuse this time?” Elizabeth looks at him, with a slight sound of annoyance. 

“Sorryyyyyy Liz we were hungry, Sammy needed his coffee” Josh apologizes, taking Elizabeth’s hands into his. She rolls her eyes playfully and forgives him, warning him not to be late again or she’ll 'shave his precious head’ as a consequence. 

“Alright guys so you know what’s about to go down today, were gonna take a little hike and get some nice shots! I’ve given [y/n] the task to film a TikTok for us today, so just be yourselves and enjoy the walk! I unfortunately have another meeting I need to attend. [y/n], Josh will bring you back to the office later, okay?” Elizabeth announces, and then heads to her car. 

We decide to take the easiest trail possible. The boys even asked the park security which is the easiest one to take. We get our pictures and I film the TikTok as requested by Elizabeth. I started to feel more comfortable around the band, I spoke mostly with Josh since he was the most communicative one. Jake hadn’t spoke to me at all today, I caught him looking at Josh and I couple times, but he’d look away as soon as I’d catch him. 

_ _ _

As we settle in the car, Josh asks everyone if they had their seatbelts on. I chuckle at his overprotectiveness and watch him start the car. He offered shotgun to me, so I could avoid “being in the back covered in the guys’ filth” as he said it. His car was surprisingly clean, I don’t know why but I expected him to be messy. Probably because his personality is very.. 'out there’.

“Hey Josh?” Jake finally speaks. I haven’t heard him all day.

“What do you want” Josh asks, over exaggerating his annoyance towards his twin. i giggle at his performance.

“I’d love to listen to the demo we recorded last night, I want to see if I can make any changes.” He says, explaining himself. My heart beats faster at the sound of his voice.

“Yeah sure.” Josh responds. He plugs his phone into the aux cord of the car, scrolling through his recordings.

“[y/n], Jake has been going crazy over this song, he wrote it in one night he says! Crazy guy” He says, looking over at me and then in his rearview mirror- to make eye contact with Jake. The car starts backing up as Josh begins to drive us back to the studio, which was about a forty minute drive. The song starts off with a bang, almost.. angry. I can hear Danny finger tapping his knees behind me, and I see Sam move his fingers to the beat of the song. I quickly look at Jake, and he’s looking at me with a look I can’t quite make out. Like he’s scanning me or waiting for something. The first part of the song is amazing, talking about a fiery-type of love, something about a woman being a hearts desire. My heart is pounding, thinking Jake wrote this. Did he write it for me? I feel my fingers shake at the thought.

Until we get to the chorus. 

“Lover, Leaver, Taker, Believer’

Each word makes my heart sink deeper and deeper, dragging it out nice and slow just hurting me more and more. My throat feels tight and my mouth feels dry. I feel the tears start to make their way to my eyes. I don’t bother listening to the rest of the lyrics, I just stare out the window until the song ends. Not letting Josh witness the tears coming out from the right side of my face. I wipe my tears- pretending I was just itchy.

"I think it’s turning out really good, don’t you think?” Jake asks. Josh hypes him up, and the band talks about the song some more until we arrive to the studio. I thank Josh for the ride back, trying my best to mask the hurt in my voice, and make my way quickly to my car. All I want right now is to cry and let it all out, let the pain that Jake has caused me out in the open. I think of the song he wrote about me, I think of the experience we shared. My vulnerability wasted, my first time; wasted. I gave him my all and he tainted it. I cry loudly in my hands, accidentally pressing my horn which causes a loud honk to come out of my car, alerting Josh and Jake, who were parked only a couple parking spots away from mine. Jake makes eye contact with me, but all I can do is back up and drive away.

Away from him.

Leaving him, once again.

Chapter 5 : Rehearsal

Today the boys were practicing their songs in the studio. I had not come back here since the last time, it felt odd standing in the room where I gave a piece of myself away. Regretfully, now. 

We all walked in as a group, not a word, or a look from Jake. Not since yesterday in the parking lot. It pains me to be in this room with him, I wonder if he was thinking about it too. 

“[y/n], here, you can sit on the couch while we play” Josh smiled at me, leading me to the couch. 

All I can think about is the couch and Jake’s thighs and his moans and his eyes and I feel like such a mess, trying not to cry as I feel like i’ve ruined it all. 

“Okay, thank you Josh” I say as I settle on the couch, sitting right in the spot where Jake had settled the last time we were in here. I see him look at me from my peripheral view, but I pretend to read something in my notebook. My heart hurts; I want to be alone with him again. Talk to him again. Do something else again… But the moments are slipped from my fingers from my own mistake. Ever since that night, I laid awake at night wishing I wouldn’t have left. The boys look over their songbook, picking which song to play. All I can do is watch Jake, and I think about when we were in this room together. He looked so soft today; in a dark brown shirt and black pants, a silver necklace hanging low to the middle of his chest. 

“Fuck. We’re missing a couple papers and I think I forgot them in Elizabeth’s office. Do any of you happen to have a key?” Josh starts to panic. “I really wanted to practice this one song” he adds, running his hand through his curls. 

“I do! Do you know where they are?” I tell him. The worry from his eyes escapes instantly and a smile of relief forms on his mouth. 

“Jake was with me when I was showing her the lyrics, go with her” Josh says, then looks at his brother. He nods and looks at the floor, waiting for me to get up and head to Elizabeth’s office. 

I unlock the door and walk in, Jake following slowly after me. He goes to her desk and looks through her documents. As he looks around, I turn to her wall- full of pictures of her with famous artists. She’s so successful and in that moment I feel so lucky to be working under her. I always wanted a career in music- well, managing artists and helping them with their careers. 

“You didn’t like my song.” I hear from behind me. I pause, frozen in time. He’s speaking to me once again, I must be worthy of his attention then. I don’t respond, or look at him. I hear him step closer to me. 

“I wanted you, [y/n], I wish you would’ve stayed” He says, softly. 

“I don’t think that’s true, Jake. I’m just there. You can have anyone you want” I respond, still not looking at him. Tears well in my eyes and I try not to cry in front of him. My heart feels torn in two. I barely know him and he’s affected me so much already. 

“I don’t want anyone. I want you” He responds. 

“You want an idea of me. You don’t know me.” I say, a tear makes its way down the right side of my face. 

“You hurt me, Jake. I gave you a piece of myself I’ll never get back.” I add. 

“I- I know. Fuck-” He starts.

“I barely know you, I don’t know your favourite colour, or season, or if you like going on walks on the beach- whatever a relationship is supposed to start like. I’ve never been with anyone, I can’t say the same for you.” I respond, cutting him off. Shocked at the courage it took me to let that out. I turn to him after saying this, and he’s looking at me with such a soft look. All I want is to hug him and be contaminated with his scent all over, his hands all over. 

‘Burgundy. Fall. Yes I do. Meet me here at midnight" He says, grabbing the few sheets of paper that Josh had requested, and he exits the office not bothering to look back at me. 

I stand there in shock for a couple of seconds. 'Meet me here at midnight’ lingers around the room as the silence takes over the fading sound of his footsteps and the elevator 'ding’. I run quickly to catch it with him, but he was holding the door open for me. 

The elevator doors close slowly, but I don’t waste time to turn towards him, his back against the elevator wall. His hair looked so soft and touchable- just like him. Suddenly, and I don’t know what takes over me, I’m wrapping my arms around him. He wraps his arms around me and holds on tight. My face is deep into his chest and all I feel is Jake. All over. I close my eyes and listen to his heartbeat as it beats quickly against my face, I smell his cologne and he smells so good and so sexy, like vanilla mixed with a masculine scent. Soft. The doors open and we’re back at the studio. Acting like nothing has happened. I sit back on the couch with my notebook and give him a small smile, which he reciprocates. 

_ _ _

I check my phone, 11:56pm. I was at my desk, waiting for him on my phone. I had time after rehearsal to go back home, shower, get ready, change my outfit into something comfier, a sweatshirt and sweatpants. Then come back to the building. I get a text from an unknown number. 

# : Studio?

I can only assume it’s him. I walk quickly over to the elevator and press the button for the studio. Once I walk into the room, Jake is sat on the couch. He offers me a small smile as I close the door behind me and walk over to him. 

“You came” he smiles. He pats the spot next to him, I sit. He rubs my back and looks deep into my eyes. 

“I want to try something, please, is that alright?” He asks softly. I hesitate a bit but nod. He smiles softly and lays down on the couch, behind me. His hand on my shoulder pushes me only slightly, indicating that he wants me to lay down next to him, well, in front of him. My back is facing his stomach and he wraps his arm around me. He holds me tight and pulls me closer to him. I feel his stomach against my back, he’s so warm. 

“[y/n], I’m so sorry for hurting you.” He caresses my side with his hand, drawing little circles with his fingers. I feel him breathing in and out, his warm breath on my neck. I turn around so I’m facing him. He holds his head up with his arm, and so I’m looking up at him. He looks so soft. Too soft. My heart forgave him but my head was hesitant. 

“I want to make you feel better, I feel so bad. It wasn’t my intention and I hadn’t thought about it from your point of view. I didn’t know it was.. your first time.. I was such a dick, will you please forgive me, darling?” He says so softly, and I just want to cry in arms, but I don’t. All I can do is nod. Even though a tear or two manages to escape. 

“Can I make you feel better, baby? Please.” He asks. I nod again with a soft smile, looking up at him. At this moment, I forget about everything that has happened between us. All there is right now is us, and him in front of me- wanting to help me. His kind eyes pull me in. With his free hand, which was placed on my hip, he pulls in my face for a kiss. His lips are soft and I already feel better. He kisses me so sweetly and his other arm makes it’s way to the back of my head. He massages the back of my neck as he pulls me in closer, our chests touching. We kiss for about two minutes until we finally pull back, catching our breaths. I smile up at him and he reciprocates it. 

“I’d love to start over, do this right. I.. wrote another song. I want to play it for you tomorrow with the boys. Will you listen to it please? I’ll be playing just for you.” He says. 

“Okay.” I respond. He gives me a big, happy smile. My face is warm like the sun shining on a mid-summer morning. 

_ _ _

“Oh my god- sorry, did I fall asleep?” I say, checking the time on my phone. 4:26am. 

“Only for about ten minutes” Jake smiles. 

“Oops, sorry, you weren’t being boring or anything- I don’t usually stay up this late” My hand makes it’s way to my face, covering up my embarrassment. Jake and I had been talking for hours. We laid on the floor when the couch got uncomfortable and just talked- not even kissed. He told me stories about his brothers and how it was growing up with them. He told me he often felt like an outsider and playing the guitar helped him get 'out there’. He told me the story of 'Greta Van Fleet’, and how they got recognized. I had been listening to him for hours, without complaint. I’m obsessed with his voice. It was like he felt comfortable with me, and I felt comfortable with him too. 

“[y/n]… I had a question I have been dying to ask you, but if you don’t want to answer, that’s okay.” he says softly. I nod and wait for his question. 

“So.. you said you’d never been with anyone before.. then how- how were you so good?” He chuckled nervously. 

“Oh- I spent a lot of my high school years reading.. all sorts of stuff. I thought I’d try it out- I dunno. I just took a chance” I respond to him, he nods slowly as I explain and smiles after I’m done speaking. 

“Well,” He tucks my hair behind my left ear. “You really knew what you were doing.” He giggles, turning back to face the ceiling. I do the same. 

“I was scared you were never going to talk to me again- when I left. I felt embarrassed or like if I was too forward.” I confess. I hear him gasp softly. He turns his head to me and I, him. 

“When you left, I came back here and laid down on the couch for a couple hours just thinking about it over and over again.” He says, his cheeks turn red immediately.

“Really?” I ask. I sit up and look down at him, wanting to see his face. I missed his brown eyes even though he’s been next to me this whole time. 

“Yeah, you took something from me too, you know? And I’m sorry for saying it like this but uhm.. ever since then it hasn’t felt the same.” By the time he finishes his sentence, he’s sitting up too while facing me. I feel my pulse begin to beat faster. Shocked by his words. My skin tingles at the thoughts rapidly going through my head. 

“I..” I begin… building up the courage. He looks so beautiful in front of me. Even though we’ve spent the whole night talking and he has bags under his eyes, he’s never looked more beautiful. More.. real. And my fingertips shake at the thought of touching him again- feeling his warm skin under my touch. 

“I’ve missed it too” I reply. Knowing that’s what he had initiated. His face turns bright red as I bring out the elephant in the room. He smiles, flushed, and looks down. I can see that he’s hard and I want to help him, to feel him.

“Hey Jake?” He looks up at me, a slight glimmer in his eye as he awaits for the rest of my sentence. I look down at his hard-on and he sees me do so.

“I can fix that” I finally say.

Chapter 6 : Taste

“Fuck- [y/n] oh my god” Jake sputters, standing up immediately after I finish my sentence.

“Do you want me to?” I ask. Standing up and approaching him, he looks so flushed, red and cute. At this point, he’s resting his back against the wall, looking down at me as I meet him there. I look up at him, and he looks so beautiful. 

“Do you want me to make you feel better?” I ask softly, right before meeting his lips. We kiss passionately, our bodies touching. My hands reach the back of his neck and I pull on his hair slightly- he gasps. Rocking his hips against me, I feel his hard on against my stomach. 

“Ye- Yes please” He pleads, mid-kiss. But all he does is kiss me harder, whilst pulling me closer to him if that was even possible. He spins me around so my back is against the wall, pinning me and trapping me under him. His hands make their way under my shirt and I let him touch me anywhere. He grabs my breasts under my sweatshirt. Conveniently, I was not wearing a bra; again. He whimpers as he feels me not wearing a bra, slipping his tongue in my mouth. Our tongues interlock and play with each other, as he rubs my nipples with his soft hands. 

“No bra, huh? You wanted me to touch you, huh?” He whispers, dragging his lips against my neck, then kissing it softly. I manage to let out a ‘yes’ but his lips take over all the possible thoughts in my head. I close my eyes and just let him possess me, allowing myself to feel the shape of his lips on my neck, to feel his soft hands on my breasts. 

“Jake” I whisper. He stops and backs off, just enough to be able to look at me. “Will you touch me?” I ask right before my throat feels extremely dry, and I start feeling like I can’t breathe. 

He smiles, big, and nods. His hair covers the front of his face and he flips his hair back, moving it out of the way. I look at him and his sexy neck, wanting a turn to kiss it, but I don’t. I let his hands make their way down to my hips. I close my eyes again, just wanting to focus on him and his touch. He grabs them slightly, as if he was claiming me to be his. He is mine and I, his. He makes his way down to the top of my sweatpants. I feel him make his way back to my face, kissing my cheek. 

“You can open your eyes, just look at me, okay?” He asks, and I listen. 

I feel hypnotized by him, I would do anything for him right now. I open my eyes and look at him, he smiles. I feel his fingers at the waistband of my sweatpants. His fingers make their way inside, and they stop at the hem of my underwear. His eyes ask me if it’s okay, if I feel okay- I do. He takes a deep breath in, which makes me feel like he was doing so for me to do the same, and I do. His hand makes its way into my underwear, and down to my area, which is extremely aroused right now. He leans in and kisses me, as I feel his fingers slip in my slit. His breath hitches against my mouth as he feels how wet I am for him.

“Fuuuuck.” He whispers. “You’re soaked” He says. I smile, embarrassed. He notices and kisses me a bunch on the cheek, making his way to my neck. I feel his fingers start doing slow circles around my clit. He knows where it is right away. I wrap my hands around his arm, he’s flexing again. It just makes me wetter, and I think he notices. He plays me so perfectly, he knows exactly what he’s doing. I watch him play with me, and without noticing, I accidentally stare at his hard on in front of me. I think he catches me staring because he starts rubbing me faster.

“J-Jake fuck i-its so good” I whimper, he’s kissing my neck, almost sucking on it. I pull my sweatpants down, and end up taking them off. He smiles at my response. I reach for him, his dick, and rub it over his pants. 

“No, baby, this is about you right now. Can I try something, please?” He asks, I nod quickly. I want everything, I am nothing but his right now. He takes my hand and leads me to the couch, sits me down and rubs my back. 

“Get comfortable, rest your pretty back on the couch” He says so sweetly and I do as he says. He gets on his knees in front of me, whilst pulling off my underwear in one swift motion. It was so sexy. He gets on his knees in front of me. His face close to my aroused area. His brown hair hangs next to his cheeks and my heart flutters as it starts to gently rub against my thigh, he’s kissing my thigh and I don’t think I can get any wetter.

“Spread your legs. I want to look at you.” He says in between kisses. I spread my legs slowly, scared, nervous. He brings his hand to my pussy, rubbing my clit with his thumb as he gets up to give me the softest kiss possible. He feels so good against me, rubbing his finger against the most sensitive part of me. The kiss ends and he makes his way back down, pulling his hand back, then approaching my cunt with his mouth. In one swift motion, he licks from the bottom to the top, and I gasp loudly. I can’t help myself from containing my moans as he’s repeating the action over and over again, then brings his tongue to my clit and circles around it. I thrust towards him and his mouth, he moans in response. It is impossible to hide how much I need him. 

“You taste so good” He says, taking a small break to catch his breath. I can barely thank him as he gets right back into it, devouring me and rubbing my clit with his tongue. He brings one of his hands up to grab my breast, I put my hand over his- so he knows how much I like it. I look down and he makes direct eye contact with me- his brown eyes locked in mine. I bring my other hand to his hair, interlocking my fingers with his brown locks as I push him down on me, wanting him even more. He catches me by surprise; slipping his tongue inside me. 

“Oh- Jake-” I moan, and I can’t keep quiet. His tongue is so warm, he thrusts it in and out of me. I want him so bad, wanting him deeper inside of me. The constant thrusting just brings my climax closer and closer. 

“I- I'msoclose” I whimper, rocking my hips into his face, he keeps up the pace and twists my nipple with his hand. He pulls out his tongue and licks my clit, and this brings me over the edge. I climax loudly with his mouth still on me. He keeps licking me, waves of pleasure take over my body, again and again. He lets me ride out my orgasm before pulling away. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand then gets up to kiss me. I kiss him hard- as if I was thanking him. He smiles and kisses back with the same amount of passion. 

I get up, pull my pants back up, standing with him in front of the couch and bring my hands up and drag them along his chest; feeling him against my fingertips is something I didn’t know I was craving, but fuck it was so incredibly sexy. My fingers reach the waistband of his pants. I pull away from him, ending the kiss, and drop to my knees, then look up at him with my fingers inside the waistband. He’s watching me, whilst giving a small nod. I pull down his pants and boxers, surprisingly in one swift motion; I’m met with his gorgeous cock. He’s so hard, maybe even harder than last time. Looking up at him, I can see his stomach from under his shirt and it drives me over the edge. I wrap my lips around the tip of his length, then slowly start bobbing my head, taking him in all the way to the back of my throat. Taking advantage of my non-existent gag reflex, I suck his cock deep and fast, letting his length take over the entirety of my mouth.

“[y/n] fuck, you’re so good. You make me feel so good” He moans softly, and it sounds so beautiful. I lick the length of his cock like I was hungry and hadn’t eaten for days. Cock deprived, I want him, I need him to come in my mouth. 

“Baby, can I” He starts. I stop and look up at him. “I want to fuck your mouth” He says, smiling sheepishly at his request, I open my mouth wide, letting my tongue out and awaiting his dick. 

“Fuuuck. That’s my good girl” He whispers. He takes one of his hands and caresses my head, interlocking his hand in my hair for a brief moment, before grabbing his cock. I watch him, the veins in his arm popping out. He lines up his cock to the beginning of my tongue, and slides it in slowly.

“Fuck” He whimpers. He places his hand on the back of my head while picking up the pace, fucking my mouth so gracefully. His biceps flexing as his head is thrown back, he’s towering over me and I feel like this is where I belong. Under him with his cock in my mouth. He’s fucking me faster now, his cock hitting the back of my throat repeatedly. He looks down again, only for a second, to watch me take him entirely down my throat. I think of something I had read before and I start humming on his dick; experimenting something new to see if he’d like it.

And oh he does. He moans loudly- throwing his head back. I hum louder on his cock, loving the reaction it got me. He’s thrusting quickly into my mouth, and I feel the urge to grab his ass but don’t- thinking maybe he wouldn’t be comfortable with that. 

“You’re so good. I’m close- I’m so close” He moans, but he can barely get it out. I take action by grabbing his balls and massaging them, as he fucks my mouth. He thrusts into my mouth for another couple of seconds before blowing his load in the back of my throat, keeping his cock there as I swallow it all. I stop humming so he’s not overstimulated; and he pulls out, breathing loudly. He backs up from me and I stand up, meeting his eyes. 

“Did you like it, Jakey?” I ask him, he’s pulling his pants back up. He gasps quietly at my question, then quickly meets my eyes with his. 

“Yes, so much. I don’t know what you did, but wow I- I have never felt something like that before” He smiles. Before I can respond, we both hear the sound of the elevator doors opening and someone walking out. He looks at me like a deer in headlights.

“Lets get out of here” He says quickly, whispering in my ear. I nod and we leave before we’re caught.

Chapter 7: Coffee

{Jake} My hands held the wheel tightly, as I was trying my best to focus on the road. How the hell am I supposed to focus when she’s next to me? Or act as if nothing happened. I push away the thought of her lips wrap- no. Jake. Focus. If I crash this car, it’ll never happen again and I can’t have that. I made the decision to get coffee with her. She listened to me all night long without complaint- I would’ve told myself to shut the hell up, but the way she looks at me makes me feel like I can tell her everything. I’ve never had that sort of connection with someone. She’s special, rare. 

I pull up to the upcoming light, it’s red. I take the few seconds I have of freedom to look over at her, she’s asleep. I feel my heart tighten at the cutest sight I think I’ve ever seen. She’s curled up on the seat, her head against the side of the carseat. I just want to hold her. A smile makes it’s way to my lips as I feel my stomach flutter, and my skin tingle. As I reach over to tuck the strand of hair that’s covering her face, the car behind me honks to alert me of the green light in front of me. I curse at myself and step on the gas. _ _ _

“[y/n], we’re here.” I say, softly, not wanting to startle her. I press my hand on her shoulder and shake her slightly. I chose to take her to my favourite coffee place. It was family-owned and about half an hour out of the city. I always come here when I want some peace and quiet, do some lyric writing or when I need a break from my brothers. The restaurant looked vintage, due to being a family owned little place, it’s been passed down for years. It resembled a little cabin and I loved it. [y/n] opens her eyes slowly and makes a little ‘mh’ noise as she wakes up. I smile at her as she rubs her eyes. 

“I fell asleep again, didn’t I?” She smiles. My heart flutters again, which makes me realize that she puts that effect on me very often. 

“You did. It’s okay. Are you thirsty? I thought maybe coffee would help.” I reply, turning off the car and unbuckle my seatbelt, turning my body towards her. She nods at the thought of coffee. She also unbuckles her seatbelt and opens the car door. I copy her and we walk in together. We sit down at a booth in the back, the sunrise letting some light in. She grabs her coffee with her two hands to warm them up and looks up at me. 

“What did you get?” I smile at her and she takes a sip. 

“A chai latte” She responds, placing her cup up to my face so I can smell it. “You wanna taste?” She asks, her eyes awaiting a response out of me. My heart flutters. I take the coffee cup and take a sip. It was overly sweet, way too sweet for me, but I smile and tell her it’s good anyway. 

“[y/n], tell me something about you, you’ve listened to me all night.” I ask, she takes another sip and looks down at the table, tracing her fingers against one of the scratches on the old wood. 

“Well, what do you want to know?” She asks, moving her cup around in a circular motion to stir her coffee. 

“Something, anything, a fun fact?” I chuckle. I watch her as she thinks about an answer. [y/n]’s presence makes such a positive influence in the energy of a room, and I wish I could spend all my time with her. 

“Hmmm” She pauses. “Well, sometimes I like to sing” Her cheeks get all red and I die a little inside. My stomach fills with butterflies at the thought of what her voice sounds like.

“You do, huh? Will you sing for me?” I ask, placing my hands under my chin, giving her my best puppy-eyes. 

“Hey, I’ll gladly suck your dick but singing is a whole different type of intimacy.” She responds and I choke on my coffee. I burst out laughing at her comment, trying to keep quiet which just makes it harder. She giggles at my reaction and all I want to do is pin her against the wall and- No. Get a grip. We both finish our coffees and I drive her back to the studio, where she had parked her car. We agreed to meet back later tonight so I could show her the new song I wrote for her. I figured she could use the rest. 

_ _ _

I enter my key into the lock and twist it, opening the door to be met with Josh and Sam at the dinner table, they’re eating pasta. 

“Jake! Where have you been?” Sam exclaims, giving me a small smile. Josh is wearing his usual relaxing attire, grey sweatpants and a loose white tee. He’s scarfing down his pasta, as if I didn’t walk into the room. 

“I’ve just been out, pasta for dinner again? Is it the recipe I like?” I ask Sam and he nods, taking another bite. Sam’s hair is in a bun, like it always is when he cooks, and he wore some black shorts and a grey hoodie. It was loose on him. I go to the stove and grab myself a bowl of pasta, then sit down with them at the table. 

“So, that new intern, she’s pretty hot” Josh starts. I feel my stomach tighten and my hunger diminish, even though I just placed a big spoonful of pasta in my mouth. Heat makes its way to my cheeks as I wait for him to add to his point, but all he does is take another big bite, adding a long pause to his sentence. 

“I was thinking of shooting my shot, I feel like she’s easy” He speaks while chewing, finishing his bite. Fuck no. Fuck off. 

“What makes you say that?” I ask, clearing my throat trying to move the anger out of my sentence. I don’t want to appear suspicious, he knows me too well. 

“Do you see the way she looks at me? She obviously wants me.” He says, mixing his pasta with his spoon as he looks down at his food. 

“No she doesn’t. Just leave her alone, Josh.” I reply. Sam watches both of us, turning his head at each reply while chewing quietly. 

“Awh, does Jakey have a little crush?” He says in a baby voice. I want to push him at this moment but I hold back, gripping my spoon tighter. I’m no longer hungry- just full of anger. 

“No, shut up. Just leave her alone, Josh.“ I reply, getting up and turning away from him to put my pasta away- keeping it for tomorrow. “You know what, I’ll shoot my shot and let you know how it goes.” He responds. I feel the hair on the back of my neck rise and my fists clench. I want to scream at him, tell him to stay away, but I don’t. He always gets what he wants- not this time. I won’t let him.

“I’m asking her out after rehearsal later.” Josh tells Sam. I turn my head back to him and Sam looks at me, then back at Josh.

“You always fucking do this! Remember the last intern?” I spit out at him. Josh scoffs and rolls his eyes. I place my leftovers in the fridge and head to my room, closing the door loudly. I’m so annoyed by him, sometimes I wonder how we’re related. I want to hide her away from him, keep her safe, and I can’t. I don’t want to tell her what happened. The thought of her hating me causes a painful sharp feeling in my chest, and I suddenly remember her crying in the car because of me which brings out tears to my eyes. A knock to my door interrupts more tears from coming out. 

“Yeah?” I call out. 

“it’s Sam, can I come in?” A weight feels lifted off my shoulders, the thought of arguing with Josh was not in my plans for tonight. I tell him to come in and I sit down on my bed. He opens the door softly and offers me a soft smile, as he comes closer and sits down on the bed with me. 

“Something happened.” He pauses. I look up at him, biting the skin inside of my cheek. “What happened, Jake?” He asks, and he asks so softly that I can’t help myself but tell him the truth about my feelings for her. He listens attentively, nodding his head slowly. His hair was out of the bun now, he must’ve finished eating. 

“I know that with the last intern, things were rough for you after a while.” He says. I look down at my hands, fidgeting with my bracelets. “I know he hurt you, they both did.” He adds. He places his hand on my shoulder, and squeezes it a bit. 

“You know I’m here for you.” I smile at him, wiping the tear from my cheek. “Now, come on, we’ll be late.” He adds. We both get up and leave, taking my car. _ _ _

We press the button for the studio and the elevator takes us up. Josh was speaking with Sam and Daniel and I stood in the corner away from them, thinking of [y/n] and what she’ll say to Josh when he 'shoots his shot’. I sigh at the thought, my heart beating quickly at the thought of seeing her again. We walk out and there she is, with Elizabeth. They’re sat in the recording room with the sound booth worker. [y/n] always looked beautiful, but today she was even more beautiful. She had her hair down, bangs tucked away with the help of cute little white clips, a white shirt tucked into some light wash blue jeans, and a couple silver necklaces around her neck. I feel bad for looking but she’s wearing a bra this time. They chatted quietly until Josh made his loud introduction. 

“There are my two favourite gals!” He exclaimed loudly and I couldn’t help but to roll my eyes. Sometimes he was so obnoxious and I just needed time away from him. I ignore Josh and look straight at [y/n], who was looking at me. I mouth 'hey’ to her and she smiles, redness filling her cheeks. She looks at the studio through the big window and then back at me, biting her bottom lip. Fuck, she drives me crazy. All I’m reminded of in that moment is tasting her on that couch, feeling her under me, her lips around my- 

“So! New song, Jake?” Elizabeth turns the conversation to me. I nod and bring my attention to her. She says something like 'lets hear it!’ and the band enters the recording room. [y/n] and Liz are sat in the other room, watching us from the window. I pull out my notes and flip to 'Flower Power’, then place my guitar strap over myself and look over at the band, they nod quickly and we begin to play the song. I look at [y/n] for her reaction, she’s smiling at me and I smile back, looking down at my guitar. I play the soft acoustic of the intro, and Josh begins to sing. 

'She is a lady, comes from all around

She’s many places, but she’s homeward bound

And now she walks kinda funny I think she knows

Day by day by day

Our love grows' 

I’m playing just for her. She has her hands interlocked in front of her chest as she smiles big, occasionally wiping a tear or two out of her eyes. I hope she understands how I feel about her. Ever since she’s made her way into my life, she’s the reason I wake up in the morning. My fingers press against the strings and all I’m thinking about is wanting to touch her with those very same fingers. To hold her the way I’m holding this guitar. I keep my eyes on her until the song ends. She gives me a little heart with her fingers after the song ends. 

'Did you like it?’ I mouth to her. She nods. We play a couple more songs, and we finish recording for the night. As we step out of the recording area, we meet with Elizabeth in her office as she requested. She was already waiting for us there but [y/n] had decided to stay until we finished. 

“Hey, [y/n]!” As I go to tap her shoulder, Josh walks in front of me. They were both walking in front of me.

“Did you like the songs?” He asks. I watch as she nods and compliments his voice. I feel heat make its way to my cheeks as I want to rip Josh away from her. He asks if she had a favourite and she tells him how she loved the first one and I smile to myself. As we make our way to the elevator, Sam grabs Josh’s arm.

“Sorry Josh I think I forgot my keys, could you go get them for me please?” He asks, giving me a quick glance. Josh agrees, mumbling something like 'lazy-ass’ and makes his way back to the Studio. 

“Go ahead, we’ll meet you there!” Sam smiles at me, and waves at [y/n]. I thank him with a look and we enter the elevator, just the two of us. He stops Daniel from entering with his whole arm, and tells him they’ll catch the next one.

The elevator doors close in front of us and I turn to [y/n]. She smiles up at me as she steps closer; wrapping her arms around my neck. I bite my bottom lip, unable to take my eyes off her. She leans in and kisses me, hard, and I wrap my arms around her back, lifting her up so her back is against the elevator wall. My hands make their way down to her ass to support her as we keep kissing. She has the softest lips I have ever felt and I’m addicted to them. I’m addicted to her. 

“The song” I say in between kisses.

“It was the most beautiful song I’ve ever heard” She finishes the sentence. I smile and the elevator doors open. We detach ourselves from each other, though clearly not wanting to, and exit the elevator. Before we make our way to Liz’ office, I pull her aside. 

“[y/n], Josh is gonna ask you out after this” I pause. “I just wanted to let you know.” I say barely over a whisper, and my heart hurts. She nods and thanks me for telling her. We walk into the office and sit down on Liz’ couch. I do my best to contain my sadness, afraid she will go with him. Afraid he’ll steal her away. I can’t lose her. _ _ _

Our meeting ends, she just wanted to clarify some information and answer our questions about the upcoming tour. Sam and Daniel stayed with her since they had more questions. Josh, [y/n], and I exit the door that leads to the parking lot. I watch Josh as he makes his way to her. He places his arm around her shoulder. 

“[y/n], come get a drink with me. I know you want to” He smiles at her, she smiles back. 

“Maybe some other time.” she replies. 

“Oh come onnnn! I bet you have nothing planned tonight, its Friday! Let’s do some drinking” He pushes. I walk up to my car, holding the handle; waiting to see what will happen. If he’s going to steal her away.

“Sorry Joshua, I already have plans” She replies, taking his arm off her shoulders. He corners her against the wall of the building. 

“C'mon darling, just one drink” I watch as he leans down to kiss her. Before I can stop myself, I’m running towards them- quickly pushing him off. 

“She’s fucking busy! Get the fuck off of her!” I yell at him, watching as he stumbles back. I already feel the guilt settling in, feeling bad for [y/n] who has to see me like this. 

“Fuck! Jake! She doesn’t want you! Just give up!” He yells back. My throat feels dry and my heart shatters in two. I look back at her and she’s watching us in shock. 

“{y/n], lets rain check. Sorry you had to see how aggressive Jake can be.” He scoffs, and walks towards his jeep. All I can do is stand there, covered in guilt with the sharp pains of sadness, embarrassment, and loss consuming my body. I watch Josh pull out of the parking lot and leave. [y/n] steps closer to me and wraps her arms around me, hugging me from the back. I place my hands on hers and let her hold me. 

“Take me somewhere, anywhere Jakey. I’m with you. Only you” She whispers against my back. A tear rolls down the side of my face as I squeeze her hands. 

“Okay” I respond, turning to her and giving her a soft kiss. She’s mine.

Chapter 8: Home

Jake and I settle in my car. He’s being quiet and I’m covered in worry. I never expected to see them fight like that, and I know brothers fight but this feels different. We sit in silence, until I start the car and pass my unlocked phone to him.

“Pick a song out of my library, any one, and I’ll sing it for you” I say to him. He takes my phone, his fingers brushing over mine, and scrolls through the hundreds of songs.

“[y/n].. oh god. Your music taste” he laughs. I’m just glad to see him smile again, and if mocking my amazing music taste cheers him up then so be it. I shift to drive and he finally picks a song. The intro to ‘Next to Me’ by Imagine Dragons start to play. I look over to him in disbelief.

“You like them?” I ask. He nods, smiling shyly. I tell him that I love their music, and then start singing loudly for him. He listens quietly as I drive towards my apartment. It was dark out and I tried my best to focus on the road but also do my best possible singing under these circumstances. As we stop at the red light, I look over to him and bring my arm out as I loudly sing 'Still you want meeeee’. Jake giggles at my singing and I start laughing. I turn the music down a little using the button on my steering wheel and drive off.

“I have to say” I pause, looking over at him as we’re stopped at another red light. “I really did not take you as an Imagine Dragons fan, you’re like, a guitar god.” I finish. He laughs at my comment and rolls his eyes sarcastically.

“They’re good” He answers, fidgeting with his fingers. “I like a couple of their songs.” He adds, and looks out of the window.

_ _ _

I unlock the door to my small apartment and let him in first. It was a studio so there wasn’t much of a tour to do. The first thing that greets you when walking into my apartment is the little kitchen to the right. My bed was in the left corner of the room, facing the window. I had fairy lights hanging over the bed and my small desk area which was in the right corner of the room. My computer was the only thing on my desk. In front of my desk was a little table with only two chairs, there was a small fake plant in the middle of it.

“This is where the magic happens!” I say, sarcastically, extending my arms out and giving jazz fingers. Jake smiles and looks around, walking around the small room. I close the front door and lock it, then take my shoes off and place them on the little mat next to my front door. Jake does the same and I thank him quietly. I walk up to my bed and sit down, leaning my back against the wall. Jake stares at me and I pat my leg, inviting him to come lay his head down; he does. I stroke his hair as he relaxes into me. His eyes are closed as I play with his soft brown locks. With my other hand, I draw circles and little shapes with my fingertips on his back.

'Does he always talk to you like that?“ I massage his scalp with my hand, he sighs. "You can talk to me” I add.

“Not always, I think- I think he’s just used to getting what he wants, or sharing- I guess.” He replies. I feel my heart hurt at the sight of him like this.

“Well I don’t want to be shared.” I reply. He turns himself on his back, facing up at me.

“You mean that?” He asks softly. I nod and smile at him. He sits up and sits on my bed, his body turned towards me. He gets closer and I lay on my back, my head on my pillow- he crawls over me slowly. His hair draped over his face, his button down loose- exposing his whole torso. He’s so sexy and I want him. He bites his lip, his face only a couple inches from mine. I feel his warm breath on my face, and I get full body shivers. My skin tingles as his body weight crushes me in a good way. His face gets closer to mine, our foreheads touching.

“Will you be mine, [y/n]?” He asks softly. My stomach is full of butterflies, and my tongue feels dry. My fingers shake as I trace the muscles on his back, making eye contact with his beautiful brown eyes. He backs up his face a little, only to really look at me. To watch me answer the question he already knows the outcome of.

“Yes, Jake. I’m yours.” I finally answer. He doesn’t waste a second to pull my body closer to his, my legs wrapping around him. All I can feel is his chest against mine, his lips on my neck kissing it repeatedly, his hands wrapped around me, the soft bed against my back.

“You’re mine.” He repeats, kissing my neck over and over again, making his way down slowly. He gets up on his knees for a second, so I can pull my shirt off, exposing my black lace bra. He comes right back down, kissing my chest, untying my bra with one hand, taking it off with the other. He attaches his soft lips to my breast, licking my nipple in the softest and sexiest way possible- looking up at me and making direct eye contact. I watch as his tongue flicks my nipple in his mouth and I’m so wet for him.

“I’m yours.” I repeat, moaning softly, playing with his hair. I feel one of his hands make their way down to the button of my jeans. He stops licking me and backs up a little, coming up to my face.

“Can I taste you, my pretty girl?” He asks. My heart flutters as I shake my head 'yes’. He unbuttons then unzips my jeans, pulling them off softly. He gets off the bed to place my jeans on the floor. I’m remaining on the bed with my black panties. He pauses before coming back to me, examining me on the bed.

“You are such a beautiful, ethereal being; I’m almost afraid to break you.” He says softly, climbing over me slowly. My breath hitches at the sight of my underwear between his teeth, pulling it down slowly. I’m so wet for him, he affects me in the best way possible. I lift my feet as he pulls them off, throwing them on the floor and meeting me back on the bed, his lips on mine. I moan against his lips as his fingers caress my inner thigh. I feel his necklace rub against my bare chest and my nipples harden at the arousal of the coldness on my skin. I slip my tongue in his mouth and he grunts in response, kissing me harder. His fingers rub my clit softly but quickly, taking over all other sensation in my body.

He pulls away and plants soft kisses down my chin, down my chest, all the way down to my arousal. I feel his breath against my skin, and my heart flutters at the thought of him touching me. He licks slowly from the bottom to the top, making me flinch in a good way. I make eye contact with him as he devours me, tasting me inside out.

“Jesus- Jake. You’re so good” I whimper, he grunts softly as he licks me harder, his hands grab my thighs and squeeze them a little, it feels so good. I feel like I belong to him, and I don’t want it to change. I think of him ‘protecting’ me earlier, his raspy angry voice turns me on so much. Jake backs off for a second and looks up at me.

“What’s on your mind? Is it not good?” He asks, with a worried look in his eyes.

“No! no, I’m sorry Jakey, I spaced out.” I pause. “I was thinking about how hot you were earlier, defending me, all.. possessive?” I finish my sentence, he sighs out of relief and smiles up at me.

“I see.” Is all he says with a smirk on his face, he brings his face up close to mine, his fingers rubbing my clit. His lips are next to my ear, nibbling my earlobe slightly.

“You’re all mine. No one else is going to be touching you like this.” He whispers. I shiver and he feels it. I feel one of his fingers at my entrance, I grab the back of his neck, awaiting them to move.

“You want me to fuck you with these fingers, my love?” His warm breath sending tingles down my whole body. I feel stuck in the best way possible, frozen in time. I nod quickly, interlocking my fingers in his hair and pulling slightly. His breath hitches and he slips one of his fingers inside.

“Fuuuuuck. You’re so tight” He whimpers softly against my ear. He stops moving when his finger is all the way inside, giving me time to adjust. He feels so good, and I feel ready to move, rocking my hips a little on him. He kisses the back of my ear, and then sits up, so he can reposition himself. He slips another finger inside slowly, as he’s towering over me. Fucking me softly with his fingers, still letting me get used to him.

“Faster, please, Jake” I plead, rocking my hips back and forth on his fingers. He doesn’t waste a second, slipping his fingers in and out of me, curling them so he hits my g-spot. He does not miss it once. I shake under his grasp- he knows exactly where to touch me.

“You like that? You want more?” I don’t know how much more I can handle, feeling my climax approaching quickly. I nod, curious for what will come next.

He places his mouth on my clit as he thrusts his fingers in and out of me. The feeling pushes me over the edge.

“J- Jake I’m gonna-“ I begin.

“That’s right, fucking cum on my fingers. Do it.” He says, almost aggressively. And right now, my orgasm belongs to him. I gift it to him, moaning his name loudly as I squeeze my bedsheets with my hands, letting my orgasm ride out in waves over my body. He watches me closely, slowly lowering the pace of his fingers, and I’m in complete shock. I lay in bed, out of breath as he lays down next to me; licking his fingers clean and resting his head on his hand, facing me.

“I- where did that come from?” I ask, in disbelief at the way he talked to me.

“[y/n], I’m full of surprises.” He smiles. I can’t help but look down and see his hard-on. I lick my lips and look back up at him, biting my bottom lip. His smile drops, captivated by my actions. I sit up and scoot down the bed, so I’m sitting next to his hips.

“Please, talk to me like that again.” I ask, unbuttoning his jeans, and then unzipping them.

“Suck my cock, princess” He says. I gasp softly, not expecting him to bounce back this quick. I look at him, as I pull down his jeans and rub him over his underwear.

I move closer, so now my legs are between his and my stomach is on the bed. I pull his dick out of his underwear and look directly at him, licking him from the base all the way to the tip. He gasps, closing his eyes and throwing his head back.

“Fucking suck it. I know you want to.” He says, quietly. And I follow his orders, taking in his whole length, all the way down to my throat. I bob my head up and down, wrapping my hand around the base of his dick and stroking him softly.

“That’s right. This cock belongs to you, suck it like it does.” I look up at him, and he’s smiling down at me, then looks up at the ceiling. He knows the effect he has on me. I bob my head up and down faster, sucking him harder. With my free hand, I cup his balls and caress them. I watch him as his eyes roll to the back of his head, his throat flexed out as he moans.

“My girl, making me feel so good, I’m close” He whimpers. I remember my trick from last time; I begin humming loudly on his cock, and he moans my name loudly- it’s so hot. He places his hand on top of my head, pushing me down on him.

“I’m gonna cum. Fuck. Don’t stop” He moans. He looks down at me, playing his arm under his head so he can watch me swallow his load. My humming vibrating his dick in the best way causes him to burst, and I make direct eye contact as he bites his lip and cums in my mouth.

I lick him clean, and climb up to him so we can lay next to each other. I turn to him, so my body is facing him and he does the same, catching his breath slowly.

“You. You are a mystery I love to unfold.” He smiles sheepishly, kissing the tip of my nose.

“Thank you, Jakey. I’m sorry we can’t do more” I pause. He looks at me with furrowed, confused brows. “I don’t know if I’m ready for more than this. I- haven’t done it before.” I finish. He places his hand on the side of my face, his thumb rubbing my cheek so sweetly.

“Darling, I do not mind at all. I’m perfectly happy right now. You make me feel so good, better than anyone ever has.” He says, his eyes focused on mine. His hand on my cheek brings me the most comfort I could ever receive. He pulls me closer and hugs me tightly, my face in the space between his head and his chest.

This exact moment is the moment I slowly realized I fell in love with Jake Kiszka and nothing could ever change the way I feel about him

Chapter 9 : Reality

“Jake?” I say as I walk into the studio. He was sat on the couch, a girl between his legs, his eyes closed as she pleasured him.

“What the fuck?!” I scream. His eyes blink open as he looks at me, emotionless. He tells the girl to stop for a second and fixes himself, getting up. He walks up to me and makes direct eye contact with a look of… hate? I don’t know what I’ve done wrong. I feel my heart beat quickly as he begins to speak. 

“You won’t put out, so I had to get it from someone else.” He says as he shoots me a look of disgust. “She’s much better anyway.” He adds, before turning back and sitting down on the couch. He tells the girl she’s doing great as she strokes his hair. 

“But. But you said I made you feel better than anyone else, you said I was special…” I whimper, wanting to rip the girl away from him. My heart shatters in pieces as he turns her face to him and kisses her in front of me.

“Why would I ever say that? I can have anyone; you are nothing but a check on my list.”

_ _ _ 

I wake up in a cold sweat, breathing loudly. The air in my room feels cold and I start crying at the thought of what I just experienced. My skin feels frozen as I get full body goosebumps, I start to shake unwillingly. My head feels dizzy, and I can’t focus on anything but the words coming out of his mouth. 

“[y/n]? What- oh my god- are you okay?” I hear a whisper behind me, but I can’t stop myself from crying some more, wiping away the tears coming out of my eyes even though more come out seconds after. Jake doesn’t say anything else; he just sits behind me and wraps his arms around me as he pulls me close to him. He rocks me slowly, stroking my arm. I cry harder at the thought of all of this being an illusion, just like in my dream. He pulls me closer and rests his head on mine. The room is quiet, the only noise that fills it is my ragged breaths and soft cries, my head being all fuzzy. 

“You’ve been waiting for your lover, when you’ll discover, she’s always there, walk a while in her summer, she is the drummer, of your beating heart" 

Jake sings softly against my head, rocking with me on the bed. I close my eyes and listen to him- shaking in his arms. He holds me tight and the warmth of his skin grounds me, as I focus on his voice. 

"She’s a woman in a dream, one that makes you fall in love" 

He sings softly, stroking my head as I begin to calm down. He finishes the song and my heart melts. 

"I’m so sorry. I had a nightmare” I finally say, after taking some deep breaths. 

“What happened?” He asks. I detach myself from his arms for a quick moment, to turn on the light next to my bed. As I place myself back in his arms, I realize I have jake’s shirt on- he must’ve put it on me before I fell asleep. I sit in front of him, and he hugs me from the back, as he’s leaning against the wall. He places his head on mine and strokes my arm softly. 

“Remember I told you how I spent most of high school reading?” I begin. He nods against my head. “It’s because I spent.. all.. my time alone. I was never really able to make a friend- so I spent my time on books.” I say, sighing. 

“I would’ve been your friend.” He says, softly with a sad tone. I sigh again, quietly.

“I don’t think so, you’re so cool and I’m the bookworm in the back of the room. A background character. No one noticed me, ever. Except the people who made fun of me for that exact reason.” I reply. 

“I noticed you the first second I walked into that office, [y/n]. You are my main character. I’m sorry people were cruel to you. You didn’t deserve it, my pretty girl. I wish I would’ve known you earlier- I would notice you every day.” He cups my face and brings it to his, as he plants a soft kiss on my nose. A tear makes it’s way down my cheek and he wipes it away immediately- kissing the spot where it was. 

“Thank you, Jake. That means a lot to me” I reply, turning my body so I’m facing him, sat cross-legged in front of him as he holds my hands. 

“What happened in your nightmare?” His sympathetic brown eyes dig into me, awaiting for an explanation for my outburst. I pause and take a moment to look at him, before I completely embarrass myself. The soft light of my lamp exposes his tired face to me, the bags under his eyes make him look so gentle and I wish I could hold him forever, freeze him in time so that we could be like this forever.

“I walked into the studio and you were with someone else. You said that since I won’t put out you had to get it from someone else. The way you looked at me in my dream…” I pause, my eyes tearing up at the thought. My cheeks burning. “It hurt a lot. I didn’t think I was going to have an anxiety attack and I’m so sorry you had to see me like that. I promise it doesn’t happen often and I feel horrible.” I finish, wiping the tear that was making it’s way down my cheek. 

“[y/n], I don’t want you to feel sorry, ever. I’m here with you, I want to be here with you.” He pauses and smiles softly at me. “I am in no rush. None at all, okay? I want our first time to be special. Under your conditions.” He tucks a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “I know what it feels like to be so anxious you feel like you’re about to burst- it happens to me sometimes before a show. I listen to some music and really get into the song- it helps me. I hope I helped you a little bit earlier.” He says softly, and I melt. I nod quickly. 

“It’s never happened in front of anyone else, and you helped me so much, Jake. I know we haven’t known each other for a long time, but it’s like we’re connected and you just…know me. I feel so lucky to have gotten the internship which has led me to you.” I say, smiling up at him. 

“Awh… [y/n] c'mere” He blushes, pulling me closer. We lay in bed, he spoons me with his arm wrapped tightly around my stomach. I reach over to my lamp and shut it off. Falling asleep in his arms.

Chapter 10: Again

{Jake}

I woke up with [y/n] sleeping, snoring softly in my arms. The sunrise crept through her window and covered her face, I covered it with my hand and reached over to her curtains, pulling them slightly. I took a moment to watch her as she slept; she looked so delicate. I waited a couple minutes, contemplating if I woke her up or let her sleep- we had to get to the office in about two hours. 

I remember what happened last night and my heart hurts as I think about how she had a nightmare because of me. I caress her arm softly. The thought of her having anxiety attacks when I’m not there worries me because I want to help her and be there for her and protecting her helps me.

“Jake?” I hear, I look down and focus on her. She rubs her eyes and turns around to face me. 

“Good morning” I say, giving her a forehead kiss. She smiles in response and I melt. 

“It’s 7:26. I need to get back home to get changed” I say softly, kissing her cheek and caressing her arm with my thumb. She pouts and I reciprocate the action. 

“Do you want your shirt back?” She stands up and I do the same. The thought of her taking my shirt off in front of me goes straight to my dick.

“That would be a good idea.” I say as I look down and realize I am shirtless. She pulls it off and I die a little inside, then put the shirt on. It smells like her. I can’t help myself but stare at her bare body in front of me, before she quickly puts her bathrobe on.

“We’ll see each other later today okay?” I say, pulling her close and holding her for a couple minutes, then turning around and calling an uber to my place. 

_ _ _

Entering the apartment, I’m faced with Sam cooking again. His hair is in a bun and he has a white apron on, already dressed for the day. He’s cooking pancakes. 

“Jake! You didn’t come home last night.” He says, waving his spatula at me. His brows furrowed as he pretended to be mad at me. 

“I knowww” I reply, smiling sheepishly. 

“Oh! I know why. No need to explain” He smirks, looking down at his pancake. He giggles and I can’t help but do it too. I step closer to him so I can tell him something that belongs only to the two of us. 

“She’s mine, Sammy. I asked her” I tell him quietly and he gets the biggest smile on his face. He claps his hands quietly as he congratulates me.

“No way! I’m happy for you Jakey.” He smiles. “Breakfast ready in 15.” He adds as I smile and walk away, headed for my room. 

I decided to dress comfortably today, keeping [y/n] in my thoughts; wondering what she was gonna wear and if she was thinking about me, too. As I looked through my closet, I picked a black shirt with striped jeans. Whenever I wore those I always felt really good about myself. I combed through my hair with my hairbrush and sprayed a bit of cologne on myself. With barely enough time to pick out my necklaces- Sam was already calling us to the table. 

I sit down next to Sam, Josh in front of me. Sam smiles at the big plate of pancakes in front of us and informs us about this new recipe that he decided to try. Josh kept looking over at me with a disappointed look, filling me with guilt. I could barely look back at him and so I just stared at my plate, not wanting to deal with him at the moment. 

“You spent the night with her, didn’t you?” He says dryly. Sam’s head shoots up and he looks at me before looking over at Josh. 

“No, I didn’t.” I lie, he doesn’t believe me. 

“You did, didn’t you?! You know I like her and then you steal her away from me!” He raises his voice. 

“Josh, c’mon the day has barely started yet” Sam tries to cool him down, placing his hand on Josh’s shoulder. 

“You want to talk about stealing? What about Taylor? What about that?” I spit out at him, unable to hold back my anger once again. Josh looks back at me with a confused look- as if this is the first time he’s ever heard of her. As if I’ve never talked about her before. 

“Wha-” he starts but I interrupt him. 

“You know what? I’m leaving, see you later.” I reply, his confusion making me furious. As I sit in my car, I’m baffled by his reaction. He never notices me, or understands me. I thought twins were supposed to love and care about each other. Why is it so one-sided? Flashbacks from walking into the room, catching them together, flood my mind and I feel tears make their way out but I wipe them away immediately- distracting myself with the thought of [y/n]. 

_ _ _

I walked into Elizabeth’s office and she waved hello, as she gave me a confused look. 

“You’re the first one here! That doesn’t happen often.” She smiles. I smile back and sit down on her couch. 

“Elizabeth?” I begin, she looks at me and pauses, then gets up and sits on the couch with me. “Do you ever miss Taylor?” I ask. She sighs and shakes her head ‘yes’. 

“Do you?” She finally asks, after we sit in silence for a couple minutes. I shake my head ‘no’. 

“I know that what happened that night was terrible, Jake. You were really hurt. Why are you mentioning her, now?” She asks, giving me a sympathetic look. 

“I need a way to tell you that… [y/n] and I have gotten together, officially, since last night.” I look up at her, she gives me a shocked look, and then a smile, aaand then a smirk. 

“Thank you for telling me, this time.” She says. “I could tell you like her. I like her too.” She giggles. 

“I really think we’re gonna last, Liz, I really feel that she’s my soulmate.” I reply and my heart melts at the thought. Before she can respond, there’s a knock at the door. I turn my head back and my heart stops. 

[y/n] wore a short black skirt, paired with a long chunky sweater. She had some semi-sheer tights underneath- tucked into her boots, covered by some leg warmers. Her hair flowed down beautifully; she looked completely different from a couple hours ago. She was angelic. I can barely say hi, as I’m taken aback from her beauty. 

“Hi Elizabeth! Good morning, Jake.” She waves and walks over to the couch, sitting down next to Liz. 

“Uh, uh, uh, He told me. Secrets out!” Elizabeth cheered. [y/n] looked over at me with a puzzled look. I mouthed ‘us’ and smiled. She blushed and my heart melted at the sight. 

“It’s a good thing!” Liz turns to her, placing her hand on her shoulder. “Our company is pretty flexible about that sorta thing, as long as we’re informed in the first month.” She finishes. [y/n] sighs out of relief and smiles at me, I reciprocate the action. 

“Just- please- no filthy things in my office or god forbid the studio.” Elizabeth doesn’t have the time to finish her sentence before [y/n] looks directly at me- embarrassed. Thankfully, Liz doesn’t notice.

_ _ _

We sat in the oval room, the walls were beige and the table was black, so were the chairs. There was a huge screen in the back of the room, to my left, where Liz had a powerpoint on; named ‘Updates and News’. I sat facing [y/n], closer to the screen. Sam sat next to her and then Josh sat next to him, Danny to my right. 

“Good morning” Sam poked her shoulder and waved at her. She waved back. Sam looked up and smiled at me before bringing his attention back to her.

“[y/n]? Do you like coffee?” He asks her. I watch them interact, but mostly her. She beams and starts talking about her favourite kind of coffee, chai I believe. Sam clasps his hands together.

“Finally someone who loves chai! I’ve been trying to get these guys to try it and they don’t want to!” Sam complains and [y/n] laughs in response. “We should go get some!” He suggests. 

“Now that’s a good idea! [y/n], will you get some coffee for us?” Liz asks as she walks in the room. [y/n] nods and stands up, taking out her phone so she can write down everyone’s order. We all take our turns and tell her what we’d like.

“Liz, I can go with her! She’ll need an extra set of hands anyway.” Sam says. Liz agrees and they both leave. _ _ _ {Y/N} 

We decide to take Sam’s car. A tesla. It’s sleek and looks incredibly advanced. He sits in the drivers seat and I sit next to him in the passenger seat. 

“Starbucks?” He asks. I nod. I watch as he types in the dress on the screen of his car; the nearest one is about ten minutes away. He scrolls through his phone and puts on a driving playlist, as he describes it. 

“I’m glad we’re finally alone. I wanted to talk to you about Jake.” Sam says. I feel my heartbeat quicken and my fingertips freeze as I look over to Sam. He’s focused on the road but he doesn’t look mad or anxious to talk to me. 

“About a year ago, we had this intern. I think it was like, the third intern our company had ever hired since the program was pretty new.” He pauses and looks over at me as the light is red. 

“Jake became attached to her quickly. They started dating behind Liz’ back, for a couple of months.” The light turns green and he stares ahead now. 

“What he didn’t know, is that she was dating Josh, at the same time. Behind his back. She would come over and stay with him until he fell asleep and then go to Josh’s room. It was fucking terrible. Josh knew they were together and he didn’t care.” Sam says, his tone indicating some leftover anger over the situation. “It was really hard to see this, for me, because when I’d bring it up to Josh he’d just get so angry and tell me I had no idea what I was talking about.” Sam sighs. 

“I’m so sorry, Sammy. That’s terrible.” I reply, we pull up to a red light and I place my hand on his shoulder, whilst giving him a sympathetic look.

“Thank you, [y/n]. Unfortunately, it doesn’t stop there. One night, after a really big show, Josh got off the stage first and went to his dressing room like usual. Jake and I got off the stage last because we were waving at the fans and saying goodnight. When we got to our dressing room- the door was locked. We guessed it was just Josh doing his after show routine so we went to a bar nearby and drank, then came back.” Sam pulls into the parking lot of the starbucks and turns off the car, unbuckles his seatbelt and turns towards me. I do the same. 

“When we got back, Liz was arguing with Josh. He was extremely drunk and angry, and Liz was yelling at him; saying she broke his trust and ignored company rules. He just kept yelling at her how it’s none of her business and that he can be with anyone he wants. They just kept screaming at each other and as Jake and I made our way into the dressing room, I’ll never forget the look on his face when we walked in. Taylor, only covered by a blanket, was on his couch.” Sam sighs and looks down, playing with the hem of his shirt. 

“Jake asked her what happened and she couldn’t even tell him. I had to make her tell him. She never even apologized, [y/n]. I told Jake they were doing all this behind his back for months. She couldn’t admit it. I was so angry at the both of them. Its like- It’s like Josh doesn’t want to share with Jake, or let him have anything. And since then they haven’t been close like they used to be.” Sam finishes. I nod slowly as I take in all the information. “I’m just grateful that Liz decided to keep us. That could’ve been our last day. She had to fire Taylor and we never saw her again.”

“I’m telling you this because” He pauses and makes eye contact with me. “I know you’re not like that. But Jake is fragile. I don’t know the situation exactly for the song he wrote that one time but I feel like you can take that as an example. He cares.. so much. I’m just hoping you care about him the same way.” He says, and smiles softly at me. I nod and smile back.

“Thank you, Sam. For telling me. I’ll tell you something personal about me if that’s okay.” I pause and he nods, waiting for the rest of my sentence. “I’ve never been with anyone before, so Jake is my first everything. I care about him so much and I’m terrified of losing him. I-” building up the courage to say it, for the first time. 

“I think I love him. It’s so early, too early to tell him so I hope you keep this between us. I just.. I’m like obsessed with him. Whenever I see him I’m so much happier and I just love him.” I ramble, blushing and tearing up. He leans over to me to give me a hug. I gladly hug him back and we hold each other for a couple seconds. He pulls away and breathes out, smiling as he wipes a tear away. He cares so much about his big brother. 

“Okay, okay, lets get some coffeeee!” I exclaim, trying to brighten up the mood. He smiles big and we exit the car.

Chapter 11: Meeting

As Sam and I make our way back inside the building, we try our best not to drop the coffee all over the place. He decided to get the same drink as me, an iced chai latte with oat milk. When he tried it in the car, his eyes lit up, suddenly that was his new favourite drink. He holds the door open for me as we walk in and we enter the elevator together.

I hand out everyone’s coffees and sit down, placing my notepad in front of me. I look up quickly to see Jake mouthing a ‘thank you’. I smile and look down at my notebook- biting my bottom lip. 

“You should be ashamed of yourself! Never wanting to try chai.” Sam scoffs and rolls his eyes at his brothers. They both laugh at his comment. 

“Alright, Important updates guys!” Elizabeth grabs our attention by beginning her presentation. “The tour will be announced today at 12pm. The tour will be beginning in two weeks!!!!” She exclaims and the boys cheer. I write down notes on her presentation and tone. 

“It’ll be only the US for now, but you’ll be visiting a whole lot of new cities and states! We’ve already got your costumes decided, setlist chosen, set design done. And I just confirmed the tour bus this morning! I hope you are all excited as much as I am!” She cheers. I look up at Jake and he has a glimmer in his eye, with the most beautiful hopeful and excited smile, as he fidgets with his necklace. I can’t help but tear up a little at the sight. He looks like a little kid who just learned he’s about to get his first bike. 

“So now that I’ve gotten that announcement out of the way” Elizabeth pauses. “I will not be able to go on the tour with you.” The boys gasp and start pestering her with questions. 

“Because” She drags out her word as both her hands make their way in front of her stomach- cupping it to show a small baby bump. Everyone in the room cheers and claps their hands together, congratulating her. 

“No fucking wayyy!” Sam claps and gets up to hug her. Josh, Jake and Danny do the same. I smile and watch them as they come back to their seats. 

“So, because of this, I won’t be able to come with you guys on tour. Which leads me to my next announcement. [y/n], I know your internship is almost over, and the company is offering you the job! It’s basically the same thing as you’re doing now but…. paid more. I asked them to make this job specifically for you. You’ll be following the boys on tour and keeping me up to date on a daily basis. Basically like an assistant manager.” Elizabeth says. I look up at her in shock, unable to reply. I look over at Jake and he smiles at me. 

“I- I’ll take it! Yes please. Thank you Elizabeth.” I smile and get up to hug her, she hugs me back. _ _ _

We all walk out of the oval room, Elizabeth heads to her office and tells me to take the day off to prepare for the tour. I head to my car and as soon as I reach for the handle; I feel someone’s hand on my hip. Jake. I recognize the feeling of him. He hugs me from the back and lays his head on my shoulder. 

“I’m taking you out tonight. Somewhere fancy. Be ready by 6.” is all he says as he kisses my cheek and leaves with Sam. I feel the butterflies in my stomach swarm my chest. Sitting in my car, I pull out my phone and check my instagram. I decide to book an appointment to get my hair done- since it has been months and I wanted to look pretty for Jake. As I click on my hairdresser’s profile, I hear a knock at my window, its Josh. I scroll my window down and look up at him. 

“Hey, [y/n].” He smiles, I smile back. “I wanted to apologize for last time, I didn’t mean for that to happen. I hope Jake hasn’t talked to you that way.” He says and my mind races back to that night; when Jake had his fingers-

“No, he would never. Thanks Josh.” I say. He looks down at me with his brown eyes, a smirk on his lips. 

“You know, I’m way better than him. I know my way around a woman- if you ever get tired of him.” He finally says, after checking me out for a brief second. 

“I won’t.” I reply. Josh looks taken aback and I feel good about my answer. “Gotta go!” I add, as my window makes it’s way up and I shift to drive, leaving Josh behind. _ _ _ 

I walk into my apartment and stare at myself in the mirror, taking in my new hairstyle. I loved the haircut she gave me- whilst it still had a lot of length; it framed my face so much better and I felt pretty. It was already 4:30 and so I took my time getting ready. I took a long shower and shaved all over, just because I wanted to feel super clean and prepared. I decided to do a softer makeup look with light eyeshadow and my usual winged eyeliner. In my closet was a body con burgundy dress I had saved for months, waiting for an opportunity to be worn. I remembered Jake mentioning it was his favourite colour. It was those satin-type dresses which was loose in the front and the back straps were very thin. I placed it on my bed as I looked through my closet for my undergarment. A black lace bodysuit that made my boobs look really good. There was a wire under the cups which raised them a little, giving my body an hourglass shape under the dress. As I put on the dress and look for my shoes, I hear my phone ring. It’s a FaceTime call from an unknown number. My curiosity gets the best of me as I click accept; facing the camera away from me. The little 'whoosh’ noise takes over the room and I’m faced with Sam. I face the camera. 

“Sam! Hey! How did you get my number?” I answer, smiling at him. He smiles back. 

“Jake. Duh. Wow, [y/n] you look hot!” He replies, raising his eyebrows at me. I go to face the mirror and flip the camera around on the screen so that Sam can see the dress.

“Do you think he’ll like it?” I ask him. Before Sam can answer, I hear a voice in the background of the call, I think it’s Josh. I turn the camera back to myself. 

“Sam who are you talking to?” He says. 

“Nunya” Sam answers, looking up at him and then back at the screen with a smile; holding back his laugh. I smile back at him.

“Who the hell is Nunya?” Josh asks. 

“Nunya business! Fuck off” Sam laughs as I watch him push Josh out of his room and close the door. Sam and I laugh together through the screen for a couple seconds. 

“[y/n] he’s gonna love it! You’re wearing his favourite colour too! Attention to details- I love it!” He replies and I smile. I make use of Sam’s presence and ask his opinion on which necklace I should wear. I set my phone down and show him the two I was stuck on; one of them was a little dagger and the other one was a rose. Sam suggests the dagger and I put it on immediately, trusting his opinion. I check the time quickly and it’s only 5:30, so I sit on my bed and stay on the call with him.

“Sam” I whisper, pulling the phone closer to my face.

“What” He whispers back, reciprocating pulling his phone closer to his face and I giggle a little. 

“I’m wearing lingerie underneath. I’m so nervous” I admit, still whispering. He gasps and pulls the phone back, setting it down on a table. 

“Wait. You and Jake never..?” He asks, almost afraid to. I nod softly and he gasps again. 

“oh my godddd it’s going to be great, don’t worry!” Sam smiles as he reassures me. 

“It’s going to be my first time” I whisper again, Sam is about to answer as the knocks on my door interrupts him. I check the time quickly and it’s 5:58. 

“Fuck! He’s here! gotta go, bye!” I whisper as I wave at him quickly, he waves back and I end the call- rushing to the door. I open it slowly and Jake is on the other side. He looks so.. hot. He wore a white button down, unbuttoned a couple buttons down exposing his chest. He had a long silver necklace that reached just above the buttoned part of his shirt. He paired the shirt with black skinny jeans, and some clean shoes. He looked so sexy and I just wanted to bring him in my apartment and rip it all off. But I don’t. 

His mouth gapes open as I open the door wide enough for him to see me. He stares at me, looking up and down just to take it all in. He shakes his head quickly and smiles at me, pulling me in for a kiss. I kiss him softly, placing my hand behind his head and playing with his hair a little. He whimpers softly as I pull a little. We kiss for a couple of seconds and then I pull away. He smiles at me as he asks if I’m ready to go.

“Sorry! I don’t have my shoes on. Give me two seconds.” I say, looking down at my socks on the bare floor. He laughs a little and waits for me at the door. I put on some black heels, they aren’t tall- more like platform mary-janes. I smile up at him and we leave together. Jake takes my hand and we walk out to his car, he opens the door for me and I sit down in the passenger seat. He closes the door softly and goes over to the driver seat. Before starting the car, he turns to me and looks at me for a couple seconds. 

“God, [y/n]. You are so fucking gorgeous. Absolutely irresistible.” He says, blushing. I smile and blush at his comment. He slowly pulls out his phone and takes a picture of me sitting nervously in his passenger seat. “Sorry- I just. Wow. I’m keeping this picture forever. You’re so beautiful, my love.” He gushes. I give him a kiss on the cheek and he starts the car, driving us to our destination.

Chapter 12 : Tonight

We arrive at this large restaurant, on a secluded land next to a beach. Jake put on some Imagine Dragons the whole way there and we sang along together. As he pulls into the parking lot, I barely have time to open my door as he’s already opening it for me like such a gentleman. I blush at his actions, this being the first time someone has ever treated me so nicely. He places his hand out so I can grab onto it as I exit his vehicle. We walk together towards the entrance of the fancy restaurant; I’m holding his arm with both my hands and I watch him smile as he tells the host the reservation name. I take a moment to look around as the host looks through the reservations. 

The restaurant had a really nice interior, sleek walls with nude colours, the lights dimmed. The chairs were rounded and made with a dark brown leather, the tables being draped with a long white tablecloths. The host tells Jake that our table is ready and leads us to the back, where the rest of the restaurant was outside and overlooking the beach. I gasp at the view and look over at Jake. He’s looking down at me proudly, almost cocky. I smile up at him as the host shows us our table. It’s the farthest one in the back; right above the beach, we can see the sunset so clearly. Jake pulls out my chair for me and I sit down, as he pushes the chair so I’m seated properly. I thank him quietly and he smiles as he sits down. 

“Jake..” I pause, looking over at the ocean; watching the waves crash against the sand. “It’s so pretty” I smile and look back at him. He’s watching me so carefully, looking over at my every move. I sit up in my chair so my back is straight- feeling a little observed. 

“Sorry, I can’t stop looking at you. You are magnificent” Is all he says. The little candle on the table lightens up his face as his dark brown eyes dig into me. He looks flushed and beautiful. He’s much more beautiful than the view, even though it’s extremely nice out. Our waiter makes his way over with a bottle of wine. The wine looks extremely fancy and expensive; with a gold label and cap. 

“The wine you requested, sir.” The waiter says as he pours a little in Jake’s glass, so he can taste it. Jake looks over at me as he picks up the glass and raises it to his lips, taking a small sip. He looks up at the waiter and nods. 

“Pour some for the lady first, please.” He asks respectfully and my heart jumps a beat. He’s so sexy and respectful and I’m taken aback by his behaviour. The waiter pours the wine in my glass and then Jake’s, then places it in a wine cooler, next to our table. I grab my glass and Jake, his, and we clink them together, celebrating our first date. I place the glass to my lips and take a small sip, swirling it around in my mouth to really taste the wine. It’s dry and sweet, I really like it. I nod slowly to Jake and he smiles as he takes a sip too. 

“It’s really good!” I say. He nods his head as he holds his glass in his right hand, swirling around the contents of it slowly.

“It’s imported from Europe” He informs me, taking another sip. My heart skips a beat again, he’s making me feel so special. “[y/n], may I take your picture again? This… this view is just so beautiful I want to preserve it forever.” He asks as I feel the wind blow in my hair, my heart beating so quickly. I nod softly and he pulls out his phone quickly. I look over to the ocean, resting my head over my hand on the table, holding the glass of wine in my other hand. I hear the little ‘click’ from his phone and I turn my head to him, another 'click’ escaping from his device. I laugh a little at his little photographer moment. He smiles shyly as he places his phone in his pocket. 

The waiter comes back and takes our order, I get something with chicken, Jake gets a steak. For some reason, I find it hot. Almost expelling masculinity as he orders. He’s so clear about what he wants.

“Jake, thank you for bringing me here. I feel so special. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.” I tell him. He grabs my hand softly, rubbing his thumb against my skin. 

“You are special, pretty girl. You deserve the world and I am going to do my best to give it to you.” He says and I can’t help but stare at his soft lips. I want to jump over the table and ride him; in front of everyone. I don’t care. I want him, bad. I smile at his answer, distracting myself from my thoughts; trying to power through this meal before jumping on him the second we’re out of here. 

“I want you to give it to me alright.” I say, quietly before I can stop myself, covering up my mouth as I start giggling uncontrollably. Jake’s smile drops as he makes out what I just said. He stares at me in disbelief as he squeezes my hand a bit. 

“Jesus… [y/n].” Is all he can muster to say, his cheeks becoming red, his breath becoming faster. The air feels thin between us as he eye-fucks me over the table, his eyes making their way down to my red dress. “Crazy girl, turning me on before we’ve had the chance to eat.” He says, then smiles sheepishly. I don’t reply; but instead clear my throat and pretend to scratch my shoulder- exposing the strap of my bodysuit under my dress. Jake gasps as he sees the lacy black material. He squeezes my hand a bit harder. 

“Fuck.” A whisper comes out of his mouth. “Y-you’re- fuck." 

We’re interrupted by the waiter bringing our plates. The food looks and smells amazing; but it doesn’t distract me from Jake’s eyes scanning me. He doesn’t even look down at his food, just keeps looking into my eyes. I smile at him and he smiles back. 

"Your food is gonna get cold, baby, c'mon” I say, not knowing where all this confidence is coming from- but I go with the flow. He nods softly, finally looking down at his plate and playing a bit with his food. I take a couple bites of my meal, and almost cum at the table at the taste. It’s so good. I moan quietly at the taste, a volume where only Jake can hear me, and he clears his throat. I look up at him, innocently, with my fork in my mouth; slowly pulling it out. Something about him, and how sexy he looks, is making me act like this. I just want him. I want him to take me and own me.

“I’m full.” He says, looking up at me. He’s only taken one or two bites of his steak. I try not to focus on the fact that he barely ate; then realize what he really means. 

“Me too, sucks, the food is reaaally good.” I say. Jake has a hungry look in his eye as he completely ignores the food in front of us. He’s hungry for me. The waiter comes by to see if everything is going well with our meal, Jake tells him we’re going to take it to go as we’re in a rush. My heart flutters at the sight of him talking to the waiter, acting so respectful. 

Next thing I know, we’re in the parking lot. He places the take-out boxes in the trunk and then goes to the passenger side of the car, opening the door for me. I follow his lead and sit down on the seat, placing my hand on his chest as I pass by him. His breath hitches and he closes the door softly. He makes his way to the driver’s side and sits down. His jaw is clenched and his chest rises quickly, as his breathing is going faster. 

“You’re driving me crazy” He says quietly as he backs out of the parking, placing his arm behind my seat, his face in of mine. I drag my finger along his chest, as he tries to focus on backing up the car safely. “I want you so fucking bad.” He looks down at me. 

“Me too.” I reply, he smiles down at me and gives me a soft kiss on the nose before turning back his body to face the road and driving off. 

_ _ _

We arrive to a huge hotel, in the middle of the city. It looks incredibly fancy and expensive. Jake parks the car in the parking lot and we make our way to the front desk, I follow him like a lost puppy. I follow him as we make our way to the elevator; he presses the button with his left hand as he wraps his right arm around my waist; pulling me close to him. I can’t help but look at his neck and then his chest, his skin looking so incredibly soft. 

We arrive to the hotel room; on the highest floor of the building. Jake slides the card into the door, unlocking it immediately. He licks his lips and opens the door for me, letting me walk in before him. I thank him and walk in. The hotel room is huge, with large tall windows overlooking the city. The lights are dim and the walls are a dark colour; giving the room an isolating effect. There’s a huge bed right in the centre, against the wall, facing the windows. On the bed are hundreds of rose petals. I turn back to Jake in shock as he closes the door and locks it. I clasp my hands together and hold them against my chest; in pure awe of this kind action he’s done for me. My legs start to shake a little out of an overwhelming wave of emotions take over me. 

“You did this for me?” I ask. He nods and smiles, stepping closer to me. He places both his hands on my hips as he rubs the material of my dress softly between his fingers. He leans down and locks his lips with mine. I gasp softly and kiss him back. His hands slowly make their way down to my ass, tucking his fingers underneath it to lift me up. I jump up slightly and wrap my legs around his waist and pull him close; wanting no space to be between us. 

Jake makes his way to the bed and sits down on the soft material, giving me enough place to set my knees on each side of his hips. We’re full on making out now- his tongue exploring my mouth as my hands pull the hair on the back of his head. He moans softly in my mouth and I can’t help myself but start grinding on him. His dick is so hard underneath me and I feel it against my wet centre. I grind harder against him; his jeans brushing my clit so nicely. The wetness from my slit has made it’s way past my underwear, leaking onto the denim material under me. I pull away him Jake’s lips, backing myself up a little to eagerly unbuckle his belt and pull down his zipper. 

“You want it, huh? You want my cock?” Jake says softly. I nod quickly. He sits up a little so he can pull his jeans off quickly. By sitting up quickly, his dick brushes against my clit and I whimper. He pulls off his jeans completely and is left with his underwear and shirt on the bed. I don’t waste another second to kiss him again, now rubbing myself on his lightly clothed length. Almost feeling the veins of his cock rubbing against me. I start pulling my dress up mid-kiss, pausing quickly to pull it off completely. Jake watches me undress myself in front of him. All that’s left on me is lace bodysuit and my underwear. My completely soaked underwear. 

“Fuck. Use me as you wish right now. God you’re so fucking sexy.” Jake says, with the most seductive look in his eyes, his flushed face and red lips is so cute and hot at the same time. I place my hands on his shoulders, and he pulls me in closer. I rub myself against his length faster, it feels so good. Almost as if he’s built for my pleasure. I feel an orgasm start building up. His hands grab my ass and pulls me closer, harder, on him. 

“You’re so fucking wet. You’ve soaked me, darling.” Jake moans, and the sound of my wet pussy rubbing on him turns me on even more. Both our underwear are completely soaked. “Cum on it. Fuck. Use me please” he whimpers in my ear, pulling me close and biting my shoulder slightly. The feeling of his teeth against my skin pushes me over the edge, and my orgasm rolls over my whole body like a huge wave of pleasure. I moan his name loudly, announcing it to the world. He groans at my response and rubs my back softly, letting me ride out the pleasure. I breathe out hard, looking at him deeply in the eyes. He smiles shyly and tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear. He waits a couple seconds before picking me up and spinning me around, placing me softly on the bed, my head on the soft pillows. He stands up and I look down at his hard-on. His dark underwear completely soaked. I cover my face in embarrassment and he smiles down at me. 

“Please never be embarrassed with me. That was the sexiest thing I have ever witnessed.” He says in disbelief. I look up at him and he makes his way on the bed, sitting up next to me. He looks down at my breasts; still covered by the black lace bodysuit. 

“Do you like it, Jakey?” I ask and he nods quickly.

“So much.” His bottom lip is in-between his teeth, as his eyes make their way back to mine. 

“Jake?” I pause, mustering up the courage to ask him. He lays next to me, resting his head on his hand, waiting patiently for my question. 

“Will you.. will you take me? Make me yours; please. I’m ready. I want you.” I ask and his eyes widen. His cheeks even redder then before. He nods and kisses my face all over. He gets up from the bed, and pulls his shirt off slowly, unbuttoning each button while making deep eye contact with me. I already feel ready to go again. My orgasm washed away like the waves in the sea, ready to come back every time. He’s only in his underwear now, making his way back on the bed and crawling over me softly; his cold necklace dragging against my skin. 

“Can I take this off, darling?” He asks and smile, pulling the straps off my shoulder. He pulls off the other strap with his hand, his soft fingers rubbing against my shoulder which makes my skin tingle. He places his fingers inside the bodysuit, in the back, and pulls it off slowly, taking my underwear off with it. His breath hitches as he catches a glimpse of my naked body, spread out on the bed against the rose petals. I place my arms above my head, resting against the pillows. Exposing submissiveness to him, exploiting how I want him to take me fully. He reaches for his jeans on the floor, pulling out a condom from the back pocket. He crawls back on the bed and towers over me, placing the condom on the night table. He looks down at me, and caresses my side with his left hand, his fingers brushing against the side of my breast. 

“You are so beautiful.” He whispers, before placing kisses down the middle of my chest, all the way to my pelvis. I raise my hips a little, wanting his mouth on me. He does 3 little 'tsk’ noises with his teeth, as he smiles up at me. “Someone’s eager.” He says softly, brushing his fingers against my soaking slit. I nod quickly, pushing myself down on his fingers as I need his touch. Right. Now. 

He opens his mouth slowly and sticks his tongue out, licking up my slit; tasting my previous orgasm. My breath hitches and I rub myself on his mouth, he closes his eyes as a groan escapes him quietly. He licks me faster as his tongue is doing wonders for my clit. I call out his name and I let him play with me however he likes. I feel his fingers at my entrance as he lays his tongue flat against my clit; shaking his head up and down as his fingers enter me. He fingers me slowly as he sucks on my clit. The overstimulation drives me crazy and I want him so bad. 

“I want you so bad. I’ve never wanted something so bad. Please. Fuck. Fuck me please” I ramble, a shaking mess under his touch. He backs off slowly, as I breathe out hard. I watch him take his underwear off, throwing them on the floor as he grabs the condom; opening the package and rolling it on his length. He crawls back on top of me, his face right above mine. I feel the tip of his length at my entrance. He’s so warm and I feel my centre suck him in, wanting his cock so fucking bad.

“Baby, are you ready? I’ll go softly, okay?” He asks, his eyes full of concern as his tip rests against my entrance. I nod slowly and kiss him softly. I pull back and watch him, keeping eye contact as his large length makes its way inside of me. He’s going slow, giving me time to adjust. I wince at the pressure and he stops. 

“Are you okay? Is this okay?” He asks, rubbing my temple with his thumb, giving me a kiss on the nose. 

“Yes. It’s so good. You.. You can move. I’m ready.” I say softly and he smiles down sympathetically. He pushes himself into me, so softly. His entire length inside of me. I feel so full, so happily full of him. I grab the hair in the back of his head and pull lightly, pulling him closer to me as I kiss him. I start rocking my hips against him, his cock thrusts slowly in and out of me. He groans against my lips, a low growl. 

“You’re so tight against me. Fuck. You feel so good.” He moans, pulling away from the kiss. He backs up a little to get a better angle; I watch him and his sexy figure, as he thrusts into me. His necklace hitting his chest as he starts to move faster. I moan his name as he makes eye contact with me- his dark brown eyes claiming me to be his. His hard dick throbs inside of me and I squeeze around him. He gasps. 

“Jake. Jake. Jake. You’re so sexy I- fuck. I’m yours. I’m all yours.” These words drive him crazy, he grabs my hips and fucks me faster, his cock hitting my g-spot so fucking good. 

“Yeah? You’re mine. God- I’m so close already.” He moans as he repeats my exact thoughts, my orgasm itching me as he fills me so well. 

“Cum inside me. Fill me up, Jake.” I moan, about to be pushed over the edge once again. He makes his way down against me, lifting my back up with his arm as he pulls my chest against his. A few seconds pass and he moans loudly in my ear, saying my name over and over again. Our orgasms ride over us at the same time; drowning us in pleasure as we hold each other close. I feel him shoot out inside the condom, the warmth sending butterflies to swarm in my stomach. My nails scratch his back unintentionally and he pulls me close to him, breathing hard in my ear. He pulls out of me and throws out the condom in the trash can next to the bed, then turns his body to me. Still catching his breath.

“How was it, sweet girl?” He asks, so softly. As if he didn’t just take over my whole body; claimed me. I roll over so I’m laying on his warm chest, wanting nothing but to be close to him. 

“It was perfect. Thank you, Jake.” I tear up, full of happiness. “You’re perfect.” I say, my voice cracking a little. He pulls away quickly, wanting to look at me. 

“What’s wrong baby? Are you sure it was okay? You can tell me.” He says softly, his eyes filled with worry. 

“I’m just so happy” I cry softly, and he melts, sighing softly with a smile on his face. He sits up and holds me; caressing my hair. “Thank you so much, Jake” I add. 

“Awh, darling.” He gushes. “Me too. I’m so glad I have you.” I hear him smile. My heart melts and I’m crying softly in his arms, holding his hand as he holds me. 

“I.. have to pee, when I get back can we please cuddle?” I wipe my tears, then look up at him. He giggles softly and nods. 

“Of course, anything you want.” He smiles. 

I come back from the bathroom, and get into bed with him, he’s already half asleep. I reach over and turn off the light, then lay my head on his. I listen to his breathing, and soft little snores. 

“I love you” I whisper, kissing his chest and closing my eyes; falling asleep against his warm skin.

Chapter 13 : Conversation

{Jake}

I’ve just dropped off [y/n] back to her apartment. I watched her as she walked in, smiling and waving at me as I wave back. I drive off with a smile on my face, the memories of last night flooding into my head. My heart flutters at the thought of her moans, her figure against mine, her nails in my back. I can’t wipe this smile off my face. I then think about the last thing I heard before falling asleep. I love you. Her words echo in my head. I turn the music up in my car, distracting myself. 

As I enter my apartment, I’m greeted with Sam on the couch, scrolling through his phone. I make direct eye contact with him as I close the door behind me. 

“Sam. I need to talk to you.” I say, he gets up immediately and we head to my room. We both sit on my head and I sigh. I look at Sam and he’s smirking.

We enter my room and he sits on the bed, awaiting for my venting. He wore his usual home attire; loose pants with a gray hoodie; his hair in a bun.

“What’s going on?” he asks, his brows furrowed and his eyes expelling nervousness.

“Last night, [y/n] thought I was asleep. She… said something to me.” I say, my voice almost cracking.

“The… L word?” Sam asks, one of his eyebrows raising as he waits for an answer. I nod slowly and he gasps- a smile making its way on his lips. I wave my fingers through my hair out of nervousness, unable to tell what I’m going to do.

“I don’t know what to do, Sammy. Do I feel like that…” I hesitate. “Yet? I really feel strongly about her, but I don’t know if I can tell her.” I say. Sammy nods understandingly and I feel relief making its way over my body as it helps me to talk to him.

“Well, Jake. This isn’t Taylor.” He pauses. “She loves you. She told me when we went for coffee. She feels so strongly about you that she decided to wait until you were asleep!” He smiles, and I smile too, as he clears things up for me.

“I think that she is really good for you. And if you think it’s too soon to tell her, wait! There’s no rush. She doesn’t know that you know, yeah? You’ve got a good thing going here, and I just know she’s good for you. Like, a million times better than Taylor.” He says sympathetically and places his hand on my shoulder. I nod softly and pull him in for a hug.

“Thank you, Sammy. You always know what to say.” I reply, chuckling at the thought of Samuel always being right.

“Damn right I do.” He laughs. “Do you want some french toast?” He adds and I nod frantically, my stomach growling a bit. I offer to help him make it and he gladly accepts; we get up and head to the kitchen. Sam and I sit at the table, I crack open some eggs and place them in a bowl as he gets the other ingredients, and then cut the bread in nice thick slices. He begins dipping the bread in the mixture and covering it, making sure it’s evenly coated. I watch him cook; knowing it’s one of his favorite things to do. 

* * *

“What the fuck were you doing in his room?” I asked, my heart beating loudly in my ears. “Answer me! I have a right to know!” I yelled, guilt not holding me back this time. My eyes darted to Sam, who’s covering his mouth in shock behind me. He removes his hand and stands next to me.

“Either you tell him or I will.” He tells Taylor. I feel the tears well in my eyes as the realization begins to hit me like a slow, burning wave. Why was she in his room… In his room.

“I- I was with Josh.” Taylor responds, her lip quivering as she looks up at me. My breath hitches as my throat hurts, I can’t respond.

“She’s been sleeping with Josh ever since her first day.” Sam answers for her. I look at him, with nothing but pain surrounding me. My heart feels ripped apart. Taylor sighs and stands up, starting to leave the room.

“No you’re not.” Sam starts, looking at her in shock. “If you leave, you never come back. Ever.” Sam says. I sense his anger in his tone, his voice raspy. My body feels warm because of the beers we shared, but my mind is completely sober. The buzz from the alcohol removed by the pain caused by her. I let the tears stream, my shirt feeling wet already. I just want to hide forever, never to see her again.

“You step out that door, Taylor, and you’re done.” Sam says, louder, as she scrambles for her clothes around the room. “You’re not even going to fucking apologize?!” He yells so loud that I jump in feedback. She looks back at me quickly, and leaves the room.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Taylor!” He yelled into the corridor of the venue. I feel frozen in time, the events that just happened replaying in my head, her face when we walked in, Josh screaming at Liz, Sam’s anger. I had never seen him this angry until this moment.

“Let’s get out of here, let’s be anywhere but in here.” Sam says, grabbing my wrist and dragging me out. He brings me to the tour bus- we sit in his bunk. He quickly grabs some tissues, and then some Whiskey; knowing we’re going to need it.

“Jake. I need to tell you my point of view.” He says, softly, looking up at me. I sit up and rest my back against the wall of his bunk, untwisting the cap of the whiskey bottle, I nod and wait for him to talk.

“It began the first or second week that she started at the company. You guys had already, well, you know. Anyway, I was making myself a tea in the kitchen when she came out of your room and asked me for a tea, so I made her one. Once I finished my tea, I got up and walked to my room; but I heard noise coming from the kitchen so I stood outside for a couple minutes. I could hear Josh talking to her. I don’t know what he said exactly but when I stepped out to look quickly, they were making out.” Sam sighs. I take a big sip of the bottle, then hand it over to him. 

“I.. watched her go in his room after. And soon enough, it was like that for the all the other times she’d come over.” Sam sniffles, tears in his eyes. His face is full of regret as he explains his point of view, ashamed. “When I tried to talk to Josh, he’d start getting really upset with me; insulting me, threatening me. I felt so.. stuck. And I wanted to tell you. I wanted to tell you everything that was happening and I couldn’t and I’m so fucking sorry, Jake.” He sobbed quietly. My heart hurt to see my little brother in so much pain. I pulled him closer to me and we held each other, crying. I took this moment to appreciate Samuel so much. He stuck up for me, cared about me.

“I forgive you, Sammy. I love you. Thank you for sticking up for me.” I say, taking another drink of the bottle. He smiles through his tears and nods. 

“I’ll always be on your side.” He replies.

* * *

“Everything okay?” Sam asks, flipping over the piece of bread in the pan. “You kinda zoned out.” He adds, looking over at me. 

“Yeah.. it is now.” I reply and smile up at him. I think about [y/n], how good she is to me. How her fingers touch me ever so softly- almost like she’s afraid to break me. I think about her smile and her eyes, her soul which ignites the fire in mine. Her entirety as a person is the glue to a broken man’s heart. She is my glue, my life, my love. 

“I love her.” I say. Sam turns to me and smiles wide, before he can reply I hear footsteps from behind me, I turn around to see Josh. 

“Fuck you, Jake.” He spits out, his emotions shifting to annoyance. 

“Josh, I’m so tired of this. You’ve taken enough from me. Please.” I plead with him. He looks at me for a couple seconds before sighing, then nodding slowly. 

“Alright, fine.” He says and then leaves the apartment. I sigh and look down to my hands, playing with my rings. I sigh, wishing I could talk to him. Tell him I miss how close we used to be, how fun it used to be. 

“You love her. Youuuu loooooove heeer!” Sam distracts me, dancing around in the kitchen with the spatula in his hand. I laugh and join him, we dance in the kitchen as the french toast burn.

Chapter 14 : Change of Plans

It had already been two weeks since my last encounter with Jake, not because I didn’t want to see him but because we were so busy with the beginning of the tour. We had already visited six cities and it had been stressful, but so fucking fun. 

I got to hangout backstage and where the concert photographers stood as the boys played on the stage- and watching Jake play was my favorite thing ever. He was so sexy when he delved into the music, his eyes closed as sweat poured down his forehead. I couldn’t help but feel so turned on when watching him play, and I missed the night we spent together so much. I knew it would happen again- we had just been so busy. After tonight’s show, there was a five day break until our next shows, and Jake told me we’d do something then. The thought always came back when I felt really.. homesick of him. 

The boys finish their encore and walk off the stage quickly, heading to their dressing rooms. I clap softly for Jake as he heads straight for me, his eyes watching me as he gets off the stage. 

“You did amazing!” I say and he smiles, pulling me in for a tight hug. 

“Thank you, [y/n]” He replies and we walk together to the common dressing room, meeting up with the rest of the boys. Throughout the weeks we have been on tour, I’ve gotten much closer with Sammy- I could say we’re best friends now and I feel so lucky to have him. 

Jake and I walk into the room and I quickly make my way to the couch- sitting next to Sam. He shoots me a smile and wraps his arm around me, pulling me close. 

“Hey [y/n]! Did you like the show?” He asks and I nod quickly. 

“It was really good, I’m so proud of you all!” I respond and the boys collectively give me a small ‘thank you’. I remember how good Josh sang and their overall performance.

Jake steps out into a smaller room- to get changed. He comes out and is now wearing a black button down shirt with some loose grey pants. I now realize that everyone else had gotten changed in some comfier clothes.

“Hey, we’ve picked up all the objects thrown on the stage and placed them in this box for you guys” A girl appears at the door with a big box full of random objects. The silence in the room is loud as her eyes widen and Sam gasps next to me. I look at him and his eyes are shooting daggers at her. Jake’s whole body freezes as she stands in the doorway, mirroring his movements. I hear Josh’s breath hitch and the whole room is filled with this uncomfortable silence. 

“I told you to never fucking come back.” Sam growls. Fuck. This is Taylor. I watch Jake as his puzzled look focuses on her, my heart beating quickly. Sam’s breathing becomes harder, as he stares at her. 

“I know.. I work here. Hey Jake.. Josh.” She says softly as she steps into the room and places the box on the table. The silence is killing me, as the energy feels so uncomfortable and I’m unsure what to do. 

“I’m sorry, I should’ve asked someone else to bring this.” She rapidly stutters before leaving the room rapidly- and Jake follows her. Sam gasps once again and gets off the couch quickly, rushing after Jake. 

“I’ll be right back, [y/n], don’t worry okay?” He says quickly before running down the hall. 

I can’t do anything but sit on the couch, my hands in front of my mouth as the latest events replay over and over in my mind. The tears make their way out of my eyes rapidly as the room is silent once again. The uncomfortability of the room is probably getting too much for Daniel as he leaves the room- leaving Josh and I alone. I can’t do anything but cry in my hands, as I’ve just watched my boyfriend run after another girl. I cover my face with my hands, the humiliation taking over my whole body. 

“[y/n], let’s get out of here, yeah?” Josh suggests and I look up at him, nodding softly. He grabs a box of tissues that was placed near the door and then grabs one of my hands, pulling me close to his body as he wraps his arm around my shoulders, squeezing a little. 

_ _ _ 

We find ourselves at a bar across the street from the venue and we sit in a booth at the back of the room. Completely secluded from the general public. I sat in the booth alone as Josh went to grab drinks- I had mentioned how I don’t drink often so he knew what to get me. He comes back with a rum and coke in one hand and something fancy looking in the other. 

“Here you go” He places the rum and coke in front of me and I rapidly take a big sip. He takes a small sip out of his drink, watching me. 

“I need to apologize to you, [y/n]” He says softly, placing his hand on my wrist. I look at him, the dimmed lighting in the back of the booth making him look so beautiful right now. He looks incredibly soft and his kind eyes ease the previous tension. 

“I get jealous of Jake. And when I heard that he likes you, I just wanted to shoot my shot- even if it isn’t reciprocated. You’re just so beautiful and he’s so lucky.” He says softly. “I’m so sorry for being a dick to you, you’re a kind girl and didn’t deserve that. Just like you didn’t deserve him running after Taylor like that.” He says and I tear up again, the tears pouring out with no control. 

“I told him I love him” I sob into my hands, Josh rubbing my back softly and hesitantly. I cry softly and he hesitates saying anything else. I pause to take another big sip of my drink, wiping my tears with the back of my hand. 

“That’s terrible. I’m sorry, [y/n]. I know he must’ve told you what happened before… with Taylor.” Josh starts. “I had her first. No one knew. Sammy thought he knew but he was wrong, I just wasn’t able to tell him. It hurt me a lot, too, when she left. Ever since then things haven’t been the same. I need to tell you that I would never do that to you.” He finishes and I sniff a little, wiping more of my tears away. Before I can answer him- Sammy’s calling. I rapidly answer and place him on speakerphone. 

“Sammy.” You say softly. 

“I couldn’t find them anywhere. Where are you?” He says quickly and my heart drops quickly, my lip quivering, Josh noticing and scoots closer to me and wraps his arm around my shoulder. 

“We’re at the bar across the venue- all the way in the back.” Josh answers for me as a sob escapes my lips. 

“Oh.. [y/n] I’m on my way” He responds and ends the call.

It doesn’t take long before Samuel is rushing inside the bar, heading straight to the back to meet with Josh and I.

“You don’t know where they went?” Josh asks Sammy and he shakes his head ‘no’.

“I’m so pissed, Josh. She knows we were performing- why the hell was she there?” Sam scoffs with an annoyed tone.

“Do you” I pause hesitantly. “Do you think they’re..” I can’t bring myself to say it out loud- the tears getting in the way of my sentence.

“I don’t know. I don’t think so. He cares a lot about you, [y/n] he’s told me many times. I didn’t expect him to be stupid enough to run after her.” Sam sighs loudly. “I’m getting a drink. Do you want another one?” He places a hand on my shoulder as he looks down at my empty glass and I nod.

“Rum and coke.” Josh answers him before he asks and Sam nods.

“I don’t think they’re going to do anything.” Josh states, looking down at me to make eye contact. His fingers rubbing my arm softly, the warmth of his arm around me helping a little. “Jake’s the type to need closure. I think he just needed to talk.” He tries to reassure me and he does a little, but not much.

Sam comes back with two drinks, he places mine in front of me and I sip it slowly this time.

“I wasn’t enough, Sammy.” I say softly.

“No. That’s not true. He cares about you so much.” Sam says sympathetically. “We hear him writing songs about you in his room all the time, right Josh?” Sam looks towards Josh and I mirror him, looking at Josh as well.

“It’s true. He’s always strumming something and muttering lyrics. All the time.” Josh agrees, then takes a sip of his drink. He slowly takes his arm off of my shoulders and rests his arms on the table, looking towards Sammy and I.

“Everything is going to be okay.” Sammy says, but I can’t focus as Jake steps into the bar- his shirt even more unbuttoned than before.

Chapter 15 : Listen

I walk into the bar, rushing to find her but it’s packed. As I make my way to the back, I see her surrounded by Sam and Josh. I make my way over but Sam stops me- placing his hand on my chest.

“No. We need to talk.” He stops me. I look in his eyes and shake my head.

“I need to explain. I need to tell her what happened.” I try but he doesn’t budge, almost standing protectively in front of her.

“She needs space from you right now, Jake. You hurt her, badly, do you know that?” He starts but my tears stop him from continuing his sentence. I nod slowly and he takes my arm, pulling me out of the bar with him.

We walk around for a couple of minutes before finding an empty bench, we sit down and he turns his body to me. My bottom lip quivers as the nervousness causes my throat to close up- Sammy’s eyes examining me in pure confusion and curiosity.

“I don’t know why I ran after her.” I can barely get it out, the shame taking over my whole body. “I guess- I just. I just needed closure. I needed to know why she did this to me.” I cry quietly, wiping my tears with the back of my hand. Sam sighs and nods slowly.

“And what happened then?” He finally asks, the silence taking over a big part of our conversation.

“We met up- she.. she tried to- and we didn’t. Sammy we didn’t do anything.” The recent actions taking over my thoughts as I ramble to him- trying to prove myself.

“Your shirt is like almost completely unbuttoned, and I think [y/n] noticed. I believe you, you know I’ll always be on your side but I can’t say the same for her. She’s really hurt.” He sighs, as he tries his best to stay neutral. I can’t even begin to imagine Sam trying to console her because of my actions. Because I’ve hurt her again.

“Let’s go to the hotel, okay? You need some sleep, I need some too. We’re going to figure this out in the morning.” Sam suggests and I nod, we then leave and take a long walk to the hotel.

_

“Taylor. We need to talk.” I catch my breath as we slow down. We’re in a staircase on the other side of the venue- alone.

“I don’t want to talk” She starts, as she pushes me against the wall, her hands on my shoulders. “I want to fuck, I know you miss it.” She adds and my breath hitches, my heart hurting.

“No, Taylor, I need closure. Why didn’t you tell me about you and Josh?” I ask softly and she ignores my question, her hands travelling my shirt’s buttons and unbuttoning it slowly.

“We need to talk.” I repeat but she ignores me, getting down to her knees as her hands are on my belt now. I place my hands on top of hers and take them off.

“No. I don’t want to talk. I don’t need to talk. I need you, so either shut up and fuck me or leave.” She responds dryly and stands up- looking up at me with an annoyed look. I gasp and redo the buckle on my pants and push her away softly.

“You don’t care. At all.” I say in disbelief and she just bites her bottom lip, the expression in her face not changing.

“Why did you come to the room then, you wanted us to see you.” I state and she doesn’t answer, but simply starts kissing my neck. I push her off gently and take a moment to look in her eyes.

“I wanted Josh to run after me.” She replies and I scoff in disbelief.

“Fuck you, Taylor.” Is all I can say before walking away from her- my thoughts immediately going to [y/n] and how hurt she must be.

_

I wake up to Sammy’s soft snoring in the hotel bed next to mine. I go to the bathroom, splashing some cold water on my face- my eyes all swollen from yesterday. I close them and take a deep breath, thinking about what I can do to fix things, to tell her nothing happened, to apologize a million times.

To tell her how much I love her.

Chapter 16 : End.

I watch Jake leave with Sam, and look down at my hands, fidgeting with my fingers.

“She’s probably much better than me” I say softly and Josh places his hand on my arm.

“She isn’t. She was not good to both of us. Sam is going to talk to Jake, okay? What you need right now is some rest.” Josh says softly and I nod in agreement.

I walk into my hotel room, Josh behind me with his hand on my back.

“Goodnight, [y/n]. I’m only a door away if anything- okay?” he says sweetly and I find him so cute in this moment.

I thank him and he pulls me in for a hug, I hug back and then step away, i wave at him before walking into my hotel room and locking the door.

-

Our five days of break from tour were over, and I didn’t spend any of it with the boys. I spent it exploring the city, doing some self care. I even got my hair done, shorter. I like it that way. Almost cutting off the pain Jake left me with. It was libererating to spend this special time with myself, with my thoughts and music playing loudly in my ears as the city discovered itself to me.

We were now getting ready to leave and get on the road, a three hour trip away. I walk in the tour bus and sit in the back- Sam accompanies me and sits facing me.

“Hey, [y/n].” He smiles softly, he looked tired- almost sad?

“Hi, Sammy. Are you okay?” I ask and he nods.

“You cut your hair!” he exclaims, changing the subject and I nod, brushing my fingers through it. He stares at it for a couple seconds and smiles softly again.

“I love it. You look so pretty” Sam smiles.

“Thank you, Sammy. I needed a change.” I thank him and look out the window.

“Listen.. I wanted to talk to you about” he hesitates. I look back at him. “Jake. If it’s okay” he finishes, letting out a little sigh.

“It’s okay.” I respond and sigh, the heartbreak brought back in my heart. He takes a deep breath before speaking again.

“Nothing happened.” He pauses, rubbing the underneath of his eye with the back of his hand, then passing his fingers in his hair softly, ruffling it up a little. “He needed closure, she tried but he pushed her away.” He adds.

I can’t help but tear up at his words, thinking of another girl on my boyfriend’s body- trying to touch him and please him.

“He wants to talk to you, apologize.” Sam says and places his free hand on mine, which was on the table between us.

“Where is he?” I ask and look around the bus, Josh is asleep in one of the bunks and Daniel is in front talking with the driver. The worry starts to set in as we’ve already started driving and Jake isn’t here. I look over to Sam and he smiles softly, reassuring me.

“He rented a car and decided to make the drive himself- to clear his head he said.” Sam says softly and I nod.

“I told him I love him, Sammy. And he ran after someone else.” I sigh, tearing up again and Sam sighs.

“I know, I know [y/n]. It sucks. But I’ve talked to him and he really wants to talk to you.” He says and I nod, wiping the tear from my cheek.

-

I step out the bus and stretch my legs, my back, my arms. Sammy does the same and we giggle a little at our funny movements.

“Fuck it feels so good to stretch” I sigh in relief and he agrees.

The boy’s bodyguards lead us to our rooms, they already had our room keys. Sam and I make our way into the elevator with the security guard, they lead us to our rooms.

As I swipe my card into the lock of the room, I smell something floral. I look behind me and the security guard is gone. My heartbeat begins racing, and my fingers shake as they wrap around the door handle and push open the door. Expecting the unexpected.

I walk in and I’m met with dozens, no, hundreds of red roses all over the room, petals on the floor. My eyes take in all the redness coating the floor and the walls; then Jake in a black suit standing before the bed.

“[y/n].” He says softly. He held another rose in his hand with a soft grip, looking into my eyes with a soft smile.

“Jake.. woah. You did this?” I gasp at the beautiful floral decor surrounding us. I take a couple more steps forward until the only thing between us is his red rose.

“I know I hurt you. I know what I did is unforgivable. I won’t ask you to forgive me, only to listen to me please.” He starts. He had his hair down, he looked like he even styled it. He was so beautiful.

“You are the woman for me, [y/n]. When I go to bed, I think of you. You are the reason I wake up everyday and decide to continue this. Continue living my life. You’ve saved me.” He places a strand of my hair behind my ear. He grabs my hand softly and spins me so I sit on the bed, he sits next to me and holds my hands in his.

“I’m so grateful that you’ve made your way in my life, and every day I wish I could make it up to you. You are the reason for my every breath, my every thought. I.. I love you. I love you so much and I have from the beginning. I should’ve stayed in the room with you. I was stupid, I needed closure. And I know I hurt you. I’m so, so sorry [y/n]. I love you.” He says softly and I tear up at his words, his voice being faint and fragile. I grab his face and kiss him, forgiving him. He did all this for me, and I needed to put this behind us.

I climb over him, straddling his lap as we keep kissing, his hands travel to my back.

“I love you. I love you.” He repeats softly over and over as my lips travel to his neck, and my hand makes its way to his crotch, feeling his hard length underneath my fingers.

“Fuck.. you’re hard already.” I breathe out and he smiles embarrassedly. “No, I missed you. I’ve needed you.” I catch up my words and he smiles at my response.

He picks me up and spins me around; throwing me on the bed covered by rose petals. I don’t waste a second to rip off my shirt, then undoing my pants as he gets naked as well.

“You missed me?” He asks, climbing over me on the bed, leaving soft kisses on my stomach.

“Lets fix that” He says, before licking a long, wet stroke up my slit. I breathe out and push myself down on him, needing the contact. I can feel myself dripping already as his mouth does wonders for me, he devours me with such good attention that I need him inside me now. “Fuck, you taste so fucking good. And that haircut looks so good on you. god- I need you.” he breathes out.

I grab a fistful of his hair and pull him up, he follows instantly, leaving kisses along my body. He doesn’t need me to say anything, the look in my eyes begging for him already. He lines up his cock with my entrance and pushes it in; it slides in like a hand in a glove. Perfectly. He groans at the contact and I tighten myself around him. I missed the feeling of his dick, of his body, of his lips against mine right now.

The pure sensation of missing him already makes me close, as he’s fucking me so fast right now; the slapping noise taking over the silence of the room.

“I love you so fucking much.” He thrusts between each word, his voice a low raspiness as his brown eyes stare into my soul. I pull him closer and kiss him, hard. The feeling of his lips sending shivers down my spine and teases my orgasm.

He alters between slow, wet strokes and fast ones, his cock taking me so nicely. I look into his eyes and wrap my arms around his back, the feeling of his length filling me up and making me feel so whole. I love him, so much. I love his cock, so much. I squeeze around him and my legs begin to shake.

“You’re already close, pretty girl?” He moans in my mouth and I nod, my hands scratching his back. “Me too, give it to me. I love you, fuck, cum on my cock.” He groans in my ear and I listen, I listen so well. My walls tighten against his hard length and my orgasm washes over me, causing me to moan out his name loudly. He pulls me close and the warmth of his cum filling me up. He thrusts a couple more times, riding out his orgasm before pulling out.

“I love you so much, Jake” I sigh, hugging him tight. He pulls me close with his free hand.

“I love you, pretty girl.” He sighs, and I can sense the happiness coming from his voice. I fall asleep in his arms.

-five years later-

I flatten down the white material of my dress, everyone is expecting me now. The sound of everyone speaking to each other in the room before me. I take a deep breath, closing for my eyes for a second. I then feel my father’s presence next to me, I wrap my arm around his and he gives me a reassuring smile.

The doors open and I’m faced with the beautiful cream-coloured venue, white roses all over the place. All the guests stand and I smile shyly, taking my first steps into the room with my father by my side. I feel too nervous to look at Jake, I wonder if he can see me through everyone in the crowd.

As we make our way to the front, there he is. He wore a black fitted suit which made his body look incredible, his hair tied back, he had the softest smile, and his eyes were teary. That is my man, my future husband. The love of my life. I stand before him and he wipes a tear from his left eye, the biggest smile on his face.

“Hi” I whisper to him.

“Hi” He whispers back softly, and he looks so in love. There’s this sort of twinkle in his eye, this difference in his smile. Behind him are Josh, Sam and Daniel. They have big smiles on their faces.

Sam especially, he held a tissue in his hand as he teared up like his brother. Holding his free hand was Jake and I’s three-year-old son, wearing a little black suit. There was so much love in this room it was almost overwhelming.

I finish telling my vows and I can tell Jake is trying not to cry, his eyes red and teary. I wish I could hug him, show him all this love I have for him, but it would disturb the ceremony and I need to be his wife, I can’t wait.

“[y/n]… from the first moment I met you, I fell in love. I knew you were the one, from the moment we were in that elevator. You were so nervous; it was almost as if it was your first day of work.” He chuckles, reading off a small paper in his hand. “We shared a moment that day, and I don’t know if you remember. I told you not to be scared, maybe you were intimidated- I don’t know. What I should’ve done was told you to be scared, because falling in love is scary. But when I’m with you, I’m not afraid of anything. You’ve made me into the man I am today.” He wipes another tear.

I’m already crying my makeup off silently by now.

“I should’ve told you that day that I was taking a leap, letting you into my heart. I didn’t care about anything else that day, only the way you watched me play in the studio. I could tell we connected on a level that was deeper than emotional; we had a soul connection. And you, [y/n], you own a piece of my soul. You own a part of me that I’ve gladly handed off to you. Just like how you’re a part of me.” He sighs, looking into my eyes with the softest look.

“You’re the first person I ever let listen to my new riffs, even when I haven’t figured them out myself. I trust you with everything, with my heart, my life. You are everything to me, and I love you so much. I take you [y/n y/l/n] to be my lawful wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health for as long as we both shall live.” He smiles, holding my hand with his free one.

We share our kiss in front of everyone, the officiant announcing us as husband and wife for the very first time. And that was the most non-hesitant ‘I do’ of my life.

And through everything we have lived, the different worlds we experienced apart, we had created our own universe. The one of Jake and I.

{@sarakay-gvf @positivegvfthings @brokenbells11 @krystalm98 @shutupdevvie @milkgemini @jordierama @​​maddie-van-fleet @writingcold @gretavanfleas @jakes-eyebrows @spark-my-nature @lek-gvf @rad-space-princess @joshkiszkatoothgap @hippievanfleet @objectsinspvce @gvfficrecs @ageoffleet @welllauragvf @weightofstar @groupiegirlie08 @fwzco @nicoleghost18 @andromeda-raine-gvf @sarrrahhh @ren-ni @zoe-tally06 @hellowgoodbye @aminaalilyy @spinthehemmo @hippievanfleet @streamofgvf @ohgodthefeeling-gvf @gvfpal @gvfmarge @jakeygvf21 @Timeless—classics @mackalah @myleftsockisnotmine-blog @bubblyjake @valvebone @lexii-nv-c @mp0801 @hellowgoodbye @girldonttryme @risingwiththeheatabove @fakeplastiqtree @beckahvanfleet }

[bey0nd-1he-stars]

Kaz Brekker - A hot drink and a softer side than usual 

𝑀𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡

Pairing: Kaz Brekker x reader

Warnings: None I think

Word count: 1324

Summary: You make a cup of coffee for Kaz and he shows you a softer side of him that he usually isn't putting on display for, well, anyone.

It was a normal day at the slat. There were no new heists planned for the moment, Kaz had too much paperwork to tend to and the ship-loads from the harbors weren't very interesting at the moment. The standard gray weather was hovering over Ketterdam as usual and the winds brought the smell of salt with it from the sea. You were down at the kitchen making some tea and brewing a cup of coffee for Kaz. The hot water from your mug was steaming and Kaz's coffee was twirling calmly in his cup. No milk, no sugar, no cream. Just dark, black coffee, matching his clothes and mood perfectly.

Balancing one cup in each hand you headed for the stairs and started climbing them slowly, careful not to spill any of the hot liquids on your hands. Although, Kaz would probably mind the coffee stains on the carpets more than he would ever mind your second degree burn you would receive for the trouble.

When you finally reached the top of the stairs you started your steps to Kaz's closed door. The wood creaked a bit under your feet and in the quietness of the top floor made you wince a bit. You didn't bother to knock, Kaz would know you were here anyway. You pushed down the door handle with our elbow and pushed the door open. It swung up and revealed a tired Kaz at the desk. His hair was a bit messy and his tie was loosened up. It suited him, this more relaxed look. He didn't look as harsh as he usually would. The everyday look fit him well and he probably knew it. It took you a while to realize that you'd stopped in the doorway to admire him from afar with two cups of hot contents in each hand. His brown eyed gaze quietly told you to close the door after you and come in, not stand there like a complete idiot. You cleared your throat and kicked the door closed with your heel before approaching the desk to set down the two cups. Kaz took the cup as soon as it reached the surface and you'd pulled your hand away from it. He sipped it quietly and gave you an approving nod when he looked up again. You beamed at his short affirmation.

The book you'd been reading before leaving to get coffee for Kaz was still lying face down on the window sill. You hadn't bothered to put in a book mark. After picking it up and making yourself comfortable again you quickly reached for the cup of tea, placing it closer to where you sat. Kaz had resumed his paperwork and your gaze landed on him again. His dark hair had fallen into a middle part and a few strands fell into his eyes. An almost faded scar was above his upper lip and you had to restrain yourself from reaching out to trace it. Kaz felt your gaze on him again but this time he didn't pause his work to look up at you. But a small smirk made its way to his lips as he put down the paper and picked up the next one.

"Don't look for any redeeming qualities, I don't have any," his voice was low but in the silence you heard him clearly. You let out a surprised laugh and pulled your gaze away from him, directing it to the book in your hands instead. A wide smile played on your lips and when you looked at him again he was already looking up at you though his dark lashes. You shook your head at him and looked away again.

"I wasn't. I don't waste my time on unnecessary things," you stated with a knowing look but a playful smile. Now it was Kaz's turn to let out a laugh. It wasn't loud or much, but it made your heart swell and your breathing catched in your throat. Your eyes shined despite the lack of light in the room and Kaz could swear his heart skipped a beat when his eyes met yours. You reached after your teacup and sipped lightly from it, careful not to burn yourself. Kaz raised his eyebrows at your action and you sent him a questioning look.

"What?"

"No, nothing. I just find it ironic that you say you don't waste your time and yet you're here drinking that seasoned water like it's tasty."

You let out an offended huff, "excuse you, mister. This 'seasoned water' is, for me, what coffee is for you. So don't disrespect it." Kaz gave you a shrug, "still a waste of time, though."

"Fine then," you said, smiling widely as you took another sip of tea to add to your dramatic act, "I'll go drink my water somewhere else if it bothers you so much," you dragged out the 'o' and raised your cup in a toast. Kaz knew you were joking of course, but he couldn't help but feel a yearning for your light company and your comforting presence. So when you turned around so that you faced him with your legs hanging off the edge of the windowsill ready to leave, he almost thought you'd actually leave for a second.

"Please stay, I'd like some company," Kaz's voice was quiet and hoarse, his eyes were glued on the paper in front of him, but both of you knew he wasn't actually reading it. You smiled at his request and nodded.

"Okay then," you knew Kaz. He didn't ask for things. He took what he wanted and this small moment of vulnerability and almost like a softness, it was something special. It was sweet. And you didn't want to ruin it or make him feel exposed or uncomfortable by addressing it. Kaz nodded and took a sip of his coffee, placing it down at the desk with a soft thud. You went back to reading your book. But you had a hard time concentrating on the words and you had to start over all the time because you just kept losing track of what you'd read and not. After a while you looked up at Kaz again, only to find him softly resting his eyes at you, taking in your appearance, just like you'd done earlier with him.

"Find any redeeming qualities, Brekker?" you quirked an eyebrow at him and smiled teasingly. He rolled his eyes at your comment and your complacency. But then something in his eyes seemed to loosen up. He sat back in his chair and pulled a hand through the dark strands as he directed his gaze to the view of Ketterdam behind you.

"Yeah, I do."

His answer knocked you back a bit. Not only because it wasn't what you'd expected him to say, but also the tone he'd said it in. Even if it was a bit teasing and kind of regretfully admitted, there was an undertone of gentleness and sincerity that you'd never heard him speak with before. And it took the breath out of you. You swallowed and nodded, smiling gently. Kaz returned to his papers and took the cup of coffee to his lips. You sipped on your tea, a bit stunned after his answer. It also filled you with a kind of comfort and a yearning to give him a hug and press a kiss to his cheek. But for now, you were content with what you had. The comfortable silence and the giddiness from having seen Kaz's more gentle side, the one that appreciated what he had. Your easy relationship and smooth interactions. It was enough for now, it wasn't one hundred percent, not a fully committed relationship, but it was all that Kaz was able to give you at the moment, and you were more than happy to see him put in the effort. It almost made you fall in love with him more.

[alabamasweettea]

the daisy

Requested by @jungkookck! I really loved writing this, hope you enjoy! <3

Fandom: The Illusionist

Pairing: Eisenheim/fem!reader

Tags: fluff, canon divergence

All your life you've been a fly on the wall. Sophie's sister. The other von Teschen.

When you met Eduard, he made you feel like you. Not the spare daughter, not anyone's sidekick. You.

"You can call me Ed." He was nearing fourteen, loitering around the door of a perfume shop just to see you. You smiled over the stacks of dainty glass bottles in the window, catching his eye. His clothes were too large, probably handed down from a sibling. Or father.

But you didn't care. His eyes were big and brown and kind. They blinked owlishly from under a mop of dark hair where the boy scuffed his shoe in the dusty road, waiting for you and your mother to emerge.

When you did—finally, after what felt like days as your mother hmphed her way through numerous bottles—he held a flower in his hand. A daisy. Its white petals were already wilting, an hour since picked, but you treasured it from the moment he offered it with a bow and a cheeky smile.

"Can I come see you?" He whispered after he'd kissed your cheek, his mouth still so close to your ear. Your face felt hot.

"Perhaps. Come to the hawk's oak tomorrow?" You answered with a small smile, trying to choke it down before anyone noticed.

"I'll be there." Your mother was looking back by then, and he skittered away.

Needless to say you weren't allowed to go out the next day, or the next. You never saw Ed again.

Then.

Fifteen years later, you were in Vienna on holiday with your sister and her new husband, not much enjoying yourself. The weather was bad. There wasn't anything fun to do, except go to some delusioned magician's sideshow. Surely this couldn't be his real job, could it?

As you sat in the uncomfortable wooden seat, afraid to move too much for fear of making it creak but insistent on flicking your fan every so often in boredom, a minute detail encroached on your senses.

A daisy.

It was in the man's lapel, stuck through his buttonhole. Its crisp white petals fresh, unwilted like the one you remembered from so long ago.

Is it? It can't be.

Don't be stupid, you chided yourself. Surely many men wore daisies. But you couldn't help wondering.

After the show you wandered about, too sick of your new brother-in-law to stick to the pair's side. He was too old for her, you thought. Too crisp. Black bowtie always perfectly done up. Infuriating.

There was a low murmur in the crowd as you were pushed aside, falling onto someone.

"I'm sorry," you began, before finding yourself looking into eyes brown as molten chocolate. An old wound on his nose peeked out from under pale scar tissue.

The man blinked in that same way you had dreamed of for years, leading you to believe...

It was him.

You hesitated.

"Eduard?" It wasn't supposed to come out, but it did, soft and unassuming as a whisper of breath.

Brown eyes crinkled up at the corners, forever stamped by crow's feet. They burned with recognition, with rekindled affection.

"I know you." There was his voice. There were his eyes, glinting with something not unlike mischief, rather tainted by something else. He looked at you like you were the only other person in the room, on earth. He looked at you like he wanted to hold your hand and keep you forever.

So he did.

Taking your hand, he kissed your cheek again, just like he had all those years ago.

"Can I come see you?" Repeating the very same words--you nearly melted.

"Perhaps," You answered coyly.

He smiled, tucking the daisy behind your ear and you took his arm, heading off to face the world together.

[evelyn-is-eccedentesiasts]

Ninjago Character Headcannons

These are the headcannons I use for my fanfiction series. If you're interested in hearing about other characters let me know.

Appearance

Lloyd:

Eyes: Bright Green eyes with powers, Dark Brown almost black without powers. Hair: Naturally a slightly darker blonde maybe even dirty, but in Son's of Garmadon he bleaches it. Like's to keep his hair long enough to cover his eyes. Body: Has faded scars from training and old missions. Muscular and toned with defined muscles. Although nothing over done. His back however is covered in Lichtenberg figures due to his battle with his father in the events of Sons of Garmadon. Face: A slightly young face, good-looking, faded acne scars here and there. Has fangs due to his Oni and dragon blood.

Cole:

Eyes: Dark Brown, looks like warm honey in sunlight. Has wrinkles in the corners of his eyes. Hair: Shaggy always in an unkempt style. When he was younger he kept it at least slightly shorter. However, after a while, he wanted to grow it out. Body: Is the bulker one of the group. Has defined muscles large arms, broad chest. Looks the part of a rock climber. His hands have calllous, scars from rock climbing and wielding his hammer. (If he ever retires as a ninja he would have a slight dad bod) Face: Sharp features, has scars and nicks on jawline due to him shaving. Nose crooked due to once being broken.

Kai

Eyes: Warm Brown, but has flecks of red, orange, and gold. Looks red in certain lighting. Hair: Always kept in meticulous condition. Never out of place and I mean never out of place. Body: Has more of a leaner build, has a muscular build, and takes meticulous care of his body as well. He knows its good looking and keeps it that way. (Post daily gym photos and selfies on his Social media) His hands have minor burns to them from overusing his element for little things. He uses lotion and skincare to try and lessen or fade the scars and burns. Face: Sharp features, no blemishes or even scars other than the one above his eyebrow. Has a skincare routine he does religiously.

Jay

Eyes: Light blue eyes, with swirls of darker blue, maybe hints of purple. Hair: Curly slightly darker Auburn hair, falls in his eyes a lot. Uses hair clips to keep them out of his face. Body: Doesn't have that much muscle definition in his chest. His arms have it. He has freckles on his body and face. Has bruises scattered on his arms and from his nunchucks. Face: Spattering of freckles on his face and across his cheeks. Also has a younger face.

Zane

Eyes: Electric Blue, (Their LED lights) has modes that are dimmer. Hair: Also always in place because (it's metal) Body: Doesn't have overt muscles but his body does look human. Has slight dents on his body arm and face. He does his best to repair the more serious ones. Face: Sharp features are more robotic but still very expressive.

Nya

Eyes: Deep blue, with flecks of green, and purple, glows when she uses her powers near a large body of water. Hair: Black she's grown it out a little just enough to tie back. Has hints of blue to it. Looks deep blue in certain lighting. Body: Has a swimmer's build. Her hands are often wrapped due to punching wooden training posts to let off steam. Has chipped nail polish, and likes to peel at it, when she's nervous. (Probably the only reason she paints her nails) Her nails are kept short and blunt. Face: Sharp features, high cheekbones, Has a prominent tan.

Misty (OC)

Eyes: Purple violet eyes, glow when she's angry and uses her powers. (Oni blood) Hair: Long black with hints of dark purple Build: Sightly toned and similar to that of a ballerina, has scars on her arms from her element use, A more prominent jagged scar running across her waist from Ultra Violet. Lichtenberg figure goes from her left shoulder down her back from Garmadon. Face: High cheekbones, with full cheeks, faded scar across her cheek. Has fangs due to her Oni blood.

[primeconvoy1]

In action today is the Titanic Creations Gorgo figure set, based on the 1961 kaiju movie Gorgo, which I enjoyed watching on a Saturday afternoon as a kid.

This was a crowdfunded project that met all its goals to get produced, and I believe this is the first time we have gotten an articulated Gorgo in plastic form.

Sidenote: I know the larger figure (Gorgo's mother) in this set was called Ogra in the movie, but I'll be referencing it as Gorgo and the smaller one as Baby Gorgo.

The Gorgo set comes in a deluxe see through display package designed and illustrated by Matt Frank .

I love the presentation with the packaging, including the awesome illustration of the monster on the back. The art also shows a burning city backdrop with some nice art references of Dorkins circus that held the baby captive in the movie

You can also see all the content of the set, since the packaging is clear plastic.

Be mindful that some of the accessories can come loose inside the package. The small jet plane accessories sometimes fell behind the larger figure if the interior plastic clamshell is not closed properly.

The main Gorgo figure was sculpted by @d0pep0pe and does an amazing job representing this kaiju.

Gorgo has ton of nice details including sculpted scales, wrinkled skin, and very crocodile like features going from its head down to the tail.

The face sculpt captures the beast well with its ferocious looking design. I especially like the detailing with the ear fins.

Gorgo stands a little under six inches tall when fully posed.

Titanic Creations suggested the figure had 26 points of articulation, but after fiddling with it, I found 39 points, if you count the 11 segments in the articulated tail. That's a bold amount for a company that is putting out a posable figure like this for the first time. Well done!

Gorgo can get into some decent poses, but the toe articulation isn't that strong to hold up the figure, if you're trying to get Gorgo in more dynamic poses. (Recommend squeezing the the front toes together where it plugs into the rest of the foot to help with a tighter joint.)

Gorgo also come with an alternate head that is the same sculpt as the default head but with brighter red glow-in-the-dark eyes! The feature does work, but the glow effect only lasts for a brief time after placing it in direct light.

I use this head as my default head, as the eyes pop more in my display.

Gorgo is done in a dark green color with beige paint going down to the front of the figure, it's underbelly, and underneath the tail.

She also sports some dark grey washes on the faces as well as the scales on the back of the figure. I really like how this fleshes out those sculpted details!

Gorgo comes with some sweet accessories that were unlocked tiers during the crowdfunding campaign.

First up is the Big Ben clock tower accessory to help recreate the iconic scene the movie.

Big Ben is painted mainly in gold which brings out those sharp lines on the building. The accessory also has some claw mark scratches sculpted into it.

Big Ben also has a break away feature, so the top of the tower can be removed.

The next accessory is the small bell sub, which appears to be painted brown and has a few sculpted details.

Next up are the jets and stand. The set comes with 3 jets sculpted in either soft grey plastic or rubber. The cockpits are painted black, which is a nice detail.

To display the jets, while fighting Gorgo, the jets come with a single round base and three black bendy wires that plug into the base and the bottom of the jets.

This was probably the weakest part of the set, as the wires don't plug into the base well and not much better into the jets.

There's also a bit of balancing act to keep them stable, once you do get them on the stand.

The final accessory is the Baby Gorgo figure, which stands a little under 2 inches. It's a static figure with no articulation. Sculpt is well done with similar paint apps to the larger Gorgo figure, just not as extensive. Even the red eyes turned out great, which is impressive for such a small figure.

Overall, I'm really pleased with this figure, and give kudos to the creative team that worked on this!

I look forward to your next kaiju endeavor!

On to pics, Primers! Will post more pics shortly.

[chuu-huahua]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO CHUUYA

chuuya is so babygirl that he gets his own birthday post (dw dazai gets one too in june lol). slay ig

tw: fire? from a candle?? / dark era spoilers / mentions of alcohol because chuuya likes wine

he didn’t celebrate his birthday a lot, both in the sheep and in the mafia. prices weren’t low when he was younger, and he didn’t nearly have enough time to take a day off to relax from the bloodshed and fighting around him

so when he found a small cake sitting in his fridge that evening, with a small yellow sticky note with a handwriting he was way too familiar with, all he could do was smile. the stupid mackerel had gotten him a cake. it even contained alcohol. stupid bandage wasting machine…

and surprisingly, mori waved him off when he came over to submit his mission report that morning, telling him to take the day off and “enjoy his youth” (his words, not chuuya’s), slipping a paper containing red crayon marks wording something along the lines of “i’ll kill you”, whatever that meant, under his own piles of endless paperwork

so, he spent the rest of his day lounging around in his penthouse, savouring the rum flavoured slice of cake his ex-partner had gotten him (of course he checked for poison; it wouldn’t do him any good to drop dead on the floor of his house before he could even submit his mission report to mori), and nursing the glass of wine from a bottle he had stored away for some time now. the sun was starting to set, bathing the land with its warm oranges and reds and yellows, and the buildings around him were coated in golden light

his shoulders had finally loosened up from writing endless reports and tending to mountains of paperwork after a while, so when he received a phone call from kouyou telling him to come over for some business, his sigh cut through the comfortable silence that had mixed into the atmosphere of his living room

but when he arrived at the oh so familiar traditional japanese style house his ane-san resided at, the surprise was clear on his face when he slid open the door to come face to face with the ginger from the black lizard. kouyou was not too far behind him, going through the entire tea ceremony with grace akin to swans, the aroma of the fresh warm beverage now wafting through the entire estate. now that he looked behind tachihara, he could see higuchi and hirotsu, as well as the akutagawa siblings

his ane-san called him over, instructing him to sit down with her on the tatami mats that still bathed in the gold of the setting sun. a cup of tea was placed in front of him, as well as a small black box. blowing softly over the top of the cup before placing it to his lips, chuuya almost choked when he opened the box to reveal a brand new pair of black gloves. his current ones were worn and creased over the years of use, as well as the countless washings it went through to clean off the blood of his enemies. the people around him could only smile at the shock on his face, some giggling at his wide eyed look

so when he stretches the new leather over his hands and wiggles his fingers, the familiar warmth of his old glove is replaced with a new comfort that wraps his hand, and the warmth in his chest burns like an inferno

although he lost the sheep when he was younger, seeing the smiles on the faces of the people surrounding him as they bring out a cake from kouyou’s fridge makes the emotions in his chest swirl like the storms and tornadoes; if he had never met dazai, he would probably have never met the people who were singing him a birthday song (his very first one) and using the lighter from his pocket (when had they even got hold of it?) to light the tiny wax candle that stood proudly on the cream 

as he made his wish and blew out the candles, he could almost feel the hairs at the back of his neck standing, as if they too could tell that there was a certain brown haired detective toasting a glass of cheap sake to him from his own apartment

some PROFESSIONAL SQUASH PLAYER DAZAI content too <3

a kiss on the lips. 

that was what japan’s number one national squash player had gifted him for his birthday, right after he stepped out of the court, all sweaty from the movement and with his racket still gripped tightly in his hand. 

sure, the frame of the eyewear had pressed against his forehead rather harshly; sure, the mackerel had sweat dripping all over him from the exhaustive game he just had; sure, their teeth had knocked together when their lips connected. but chuuya could not deny that his skin shone as bright as his hair, the back of his hand pressed to his pursed lips, sharp blue eyes following the taller figure as he skipped off to find his manager. 

he continued to stare at the back of the exercise shirt that had gotten slightly see-through with the sweat running down the man’s back, but his shoulders visibly flinched when dazai turned to look back at him, eyes shining with mirth. happy birthday, he mouthed, before giggling cheekily and trailing after the man with sleek black hair that led him away, leaving chuuya to continue feeling the intense burn of his cheeks.

[leighsartworks216]

Strawberry Lip Balm

Klavier Gavin x gn!reader

Okay so I'm aroace so I have no idea what crushes are like but I tried my best?? I've also never written for Klavier before but I just finished aa4 and I couldn't resist lol

Translations at the end :)

Warnings: none

Word Count: 1393

Masterlist

AO3

You don't know how such a stupid, blurted-out question brought you to this moment, but sitting in the God of Rock's lap with his hands set on your hips to support you, you couldn't find it in yourself to care.

"Can I do your makeup?"

It was a stupid question. He had his head in your lap, guitar across his stomach as he loosely tried out melodies, and you lost yourself admiring his features. You weren't thinking - you really expected him to laugh in your face and tease you for it. Instead, he took it like it was any other question.

With a slight grin, he remembered he had a makeup bag tucked away in his unnecessarily tall filing cabinet. So he got up from the couch, propped his guitar safely in its glass case, and rifled through the endless drawers while you sat there trying to collect yourself. He found the case, plopped back on the couch, and after several minutes of struggling to position yourself to do anything to his handsome features, he told you to just sit in his lap.

It took a moment of adjusting. To be honest, you couldn’t tell if he was just doing this to mess with you or if he was being genuine. It was better not to think about it too much.

His makeup bag contained some basic things - dark pencil liner, some concealer, an eyebrow brush. But tucked down toward the bottom was a bold liquid liner, mascara, even a couple round containers of blush and eyeshadow.

Klavier was essentially putty in your hands. You decided to try out some eyeshadow and asked him to close his eyes, and he obligingly shut them. His grin never faltered, even for a second.

With a brush from the bag, you very carefully worked to apply a brown shade to his lid. It complimented his tan skin exceptionally well, and you tried not to get stuck just admiring him there. The trust he was putting in you to do this…

Warm hands squeezed your hips playfully, startling you.

“Don’t forget to breathe, schatzi,” he teased. “You’ll have plenty of time to admire me when you’ve finished.”

You scoffed, desperately ignoring the way your cheeks burned. Still, he kept his eyes closed, so at least he wouldn’t see how flustered you were. “I could make you look hideous on purpose, Klav,” you threatened. “You’re lucky I won’t.”

He huffed a laugh. It resonated through you. “I am grateful, liebling. I would hate to frighten my fans.”

Once the eyeshadow was even (enough), you put away the container and brushes. You picked up the pencil liner, then considered the liquid liner. It was hard enough to get even lines on yourself, but… It was just for fun, right? It wouldn’t matter. He’d probably wash it off once you left.

“Trouble?”

You grabbed the liquid liner. “Nope. Now shut your eyes.”

The brush was thin, perfect for sharp lines. The rich black glided across his lashline and into an “elegant” wing. You leaned in closer in your concentration. Joke or not, you were going to get this perfect. Klavier waited in perfect silence as he felt the cool, wet ink define his eyes. He also felt how you went back and forth between both eyes, and heard when you cussed quietly under your breath before adjusting one or the other.

As he sat there, acting as the perfect subject, his mind wandered. When he first met you on a crime scene several years ago, you’d tried to stop him from entering. You didn’t realize the famous Klavier Gavin of the Gavinners was also Klavier Gavin the prosecutor. You’d apologized profusely for the confusion, but he just laughed it off. Somehow, you became friends. Similar to Prosecutor Edgeworth and Detective Gumshoe, you became stuck to his side. He requested you to lead investigations when he was working the case, you would testify the lay-down of the events during trials, and he took you out to dinner when he “won” (though he was always more interested in the truth than winning).

Somewhere along the way, he couldn’t quite figure out when, his thoughts would constantly shift to you. What did you do when you weren’t working? What was your favorite color? Favorite food? Did you like scary movies or were you the kind of person to hide behind a pillow the whole time? He wanted to know so much about you, always. Maybe that’s how these get-togethers started. Maybe he asked if you wanted to hang out after investigations or trials to get to know you better. The real you. The you that didn’t hide behind your badge.

Maybe that’s why he didn’t hesitate to indulge your stupid question. Maybe that’s why he let you sit in his lap. Maybe that’s why he held onto you, even if you didn’t need the support.

“Klav?”

Ripped from his thoughts, he carefully opened his eyes, worried the liner could still be wet. He didn’t realize you finished his eyes several minutes ago, and had filled in his eyebrows and touched his cheek-bones with blush while he zoned out.

You were still there, sitting in his lap. He almost forgot you were really there. You turned a small tube around in your hands, looking for a label. He hummed, getting your attention. You held the small container to him so he could look, too.

“What is this?”

He removed a hand from your hip to take it from you. The warmth lingered behind, but you missed the weight it provided.

“I think…” Skillfully, with one hand, he opened the tube. He smelled the whitish wax inside. “Ah! It’s my strawberry lip balm. I thought I lost it.”

“Strawberry?”

He hummed, holding it out for you to smell. You leaned forward and held the back of his hand as you cautiously sniffed it. He hoped the way his cheeks tinged pink was hidden by the blush.

“Oh, it does smell like strawberries!”

“It tastes like strawberries, too, schatzi,” he mused. “Put it on, try it.”

You swore your whole face was red. “A-Are you sure?”

“Ja. I can always buy more if I need to.”

You carefully took the lip balm from his hand and twisted it to expose more of the wax, looking away to save yourself the embarrassment. All the while, Klavier felt his heart stutter as he watched you carefully apply it to your lips. Watching the movement entranced him. It was like being on stage and watching as the crowd coordinated into a wave of fluid movement, energizing him even more. His pupils blew wide as you tentatively rubbed your lips together and licked slightly, tasting the strawberry flavor.

A thumb and index finger gently grabbed your chin, urging you to face him again. He had to force himself to stop staring at your lips that now gleamed in the late-afternoon light spilling into his office, but he was just as stunned by the way your eyes sparkled with the orange sun’s rays.

“Can I try it, liebling?” His voice was a low whisper. No one would think this is the man that regularly belted out his soul on stage.

He waited, waited until you gave him your answer with the slightest nod, almost imperceptible if he did not feel the movement between his fingers.

He guided your face closer, eyes becoming half-lidded as he pulled you in. His mind raced, thinking only of what you would taste like through the sweet strawberry lip balm. Of what you would feel like against his lips. His eyes shut the instant your lips brushed his.

The kiss was barely-there, like a butterfly’s wing fluttering against sun-kissed summer skin. It didn’t last that way forever, though. Klavier pulled away, before going back in with more vigor, eagerly angling his head to reach every inch of your lips he could.

His hand reached around to cradle the back of your neck. Cold rings sent shivers down your spine, and you felt the way he grinned. You slid a hand up and over his shoulder, around his neck and into his long hair. He groaned into the kiss, pulling you closer with the hand on your hip; he despised the space between your bodies, desperate to feel all of you.

Strawberry was his new favorite flavor.

--

Translations:

Schatzi - treasure

Liebling - darling

Ja - yes

[neopronouns-in-action]

Neopronouns in Action #077: Jenny Every...Who?

Neopronouns: rat/rats/ratself which follow the same rules as it/its/itself

Replace it with rat Replace its with rats Replace itself with ratself

EX:

"It is going to adopt a new puppy soon, as soon as it gets a fence set up around its yard so the puppy can go outside without it having to walk it. Its uncle is going to help set up the fence, since he has a set of power tools he's letting it use, since it lost its. It's going to buy toys and train the puppy itself."

Becomes:

"Rat is going to adopt a new puppy soon, as soon as rat gets a fence set up around rats yard so the puppy can go outside without rat having to walk it. Rats uncle is going to help set up the fence, since he has a set of power tools he's letting rat use, since rat lost rats. Rat's going to buy toys and train the puppy ratself."

(Archived read-more link)

___

When Lhakhovi Skizum woke up and found ratself in a room with glowing white walls and ceiling and a jet black floor, rat assumed rat was dreaming. It was the logical conclusion for the circumstances, considering the last thing rat remembered was going to bed at 4am from reading on rats phone.

The dream hypothesis was further confirmed when rat found a mirror on one of the walls, and when rat looked in, it wasn’t rat looking back out. The face looking back was completely unfamiliar. For one thing, it wasn’t a human face. Rather than round human ears, there were large, pointed, fluffy ears on the sides of rats head like in a fantasy game. And the weirdest thing about them was that the insides were bright blue.

The eyes at least were the same, the only familiar thing on an alien face; a brown so dark they almost seemed black unless you looked very closely.

The hair was straight and cut short, and capped by a pair of metal-rimmed goggles, and brown rather than black. The skin was also a much lighter shade of brown than rats. Rat couldn’t see the mouth on this strange face, because rat was wearing a cloth facemask, and didn’t feel any particular compulsion to pull it down.

Skizum found that rat was wearing an overly large red scarf, a dark, very heavy and warm leather jacket with fur on the collar, wrist cuffs, and waist, and long, thick dark blue pants that seemed to be lined with fleece.

The warm clothes were apparently warranted, because the exposed skin on rats hands and around rats eyes was chilled with the cold air that seemed to pervade the room. Rat looked down to see large, heavy leather boots with a strange design. Rat couldn’t immediately put a finger on why the design seemed strange, until rat realized that they were way too short on the front – how were feet supposed to fit into them?

But like with the mask, rat felt no burning desire to take them off to see how it worked. Like a dream, rat felt that these things were, if curious, not really worth getting worked up about. Skizum was interested, yes, but also calm in the sort of way that only comes in dreams.

Rat turned to look around the room, and saw a dark, open doorway on the far side that hadn’t been there before. Faint, energetic music was coming from somewhere on the other side.

Rat started towards it, figuring that whatever the plot of the dream would be, it would probably be more interesting out there.

As Skizum was just starting to step through the doorway, a sudden sign appeared, floating in the air in front of rat, just at eye level, and at the right distance to be easily read. It was glowing white like the walls, which should have hurt the eyes, but somehow didn’t, because of the strange logic of dreams.

Written on this sign in what looked like swirling, cursive handwriting that somehow managed to have tons of loops and swirls while still being perfectly legible, were the words, written in deep pitch black flecked with stars:

“The character of Jenny Everywhere is available for use by anyone, with only one condition. This paragraph must be included in any publication involving Jenny Everywhere, in order that others may use this property as they wish. All rights reversed.”

Skizum read it again automatically, admiring the sure strokes of...star-ink? After the third time rat read it, the sign slowly faded away into thin air, leaving rat saying aloud to ratself, “Well, I guess I have more evidence for Rem that it’s a myth that you can’t read in dreams now…”

Rat thought about the words rat had read, and was both surprised and pleased that rat could remember them clearly. Usually, when rat read something in a dream, the words were hard to remember afterward, and seemed to get jumbled in rats mind the more rat tried to remember them. But sometimes, like this time, rat could remember them clearly. Rem didn’t really believe rat when rat told her rat could do this, but she’d at least have to admit rat was creative, if nothing else, when rat woke up and told her about this dream.

Rat would make sure to write the words down as soon as rat woke up, so she wouldn’t be able to say rat had planned it out ahead of time.

For a few moments, or maybe minutes, Skizum pondered the idea of forcing ratself to wake up to write the words down now. But after thinking about it, rat decided not to risk it – rat could still remember all the words perfectly, rat was sure rat would remember when rat eventually woke up naturally. But if rat woke ratself up now, rat might not be able to come back to this dream again, and it was interesting so far. Rat wanted to see what would happen next.

So Skizum continued on through the doorway, and immediately found ratself in an apparently completely endless hallway extending off to the left and right, with more black doors lining every space of the wall, separated only by the grey doorframes.

Despite what could and maybe should have been a frightening situation, Skizum wasn’t afraid. Rat was merely curious and calm, ready to explore, but in a sort of sleepy, pleasant way. There was no rush, the dream seemed to silently say, stay as long as you like. Join the party if you want.

The music Skizum had heard earlier was coming from a black doorway a few doors down on rats right, and on the opposite wall. Above this door were glowing blue neon letters that said “loud room”, with red letters below them reading, “quiet room”, with an arrow pointing further to the right. Rat glanced in that direction, and much further down the hall, somehow managed to see the door with the opposite labels. Since the loud room was closer and Skizum didn’t mind high volumes, rat made rats way over, and with the casual bravery unique to dreams you knew you were dreaming, stepped through without hesitation.

It was another room like the one rat had found ratself in, but in this one, the walls weren’t blank glowing white, they swirled with colors in ribbony wisps, pulsing and twisting in time to the fast-paced, electronic music that seemed to be coming from a band on the far wall across the room, where four people, each with the same short, dark hair, brown skin, and red scarves were playing on an electric keyboard, what looked like a regular laptop, and some instrument rat didn’t recognize.

Between the band and Skizum was a crowd of dozens of people, all with the same general features, but with different styles of clothing, heights, and weights. Many had red scarves, but others had blue, green, brown, or black. One person had a yellow one, another had a pink. Some had glasses, most didn’t. Some were using crutches or canes, and three were in wheelchairs, with another two using rollators.

A few were different species – there was a cat person, a dog person, a fox person, a rhino person, a monkey person, a bird person, and even stranger things, like the fantasy creature Skizum appeared to be at the moment. Now that Skizum was looking at others like rats current form, rat realized for the first time that rat had a tail, brown and covered with long, fine hairs like a horse tail. It had just felt so natural and normal that rat hadn’t noticed it until now.

This dream was so weird, but so interesting.

Some of the people – clones? -- were dancing in the middle of the floor, others were grouped off to the sides, where tables lined the walls covered in various foods, with yellow plastic cups for drinks, talking animatedly.

One of them closer to the door saw Skizum, and did a doubletake so abrupt they dropped their cup. But another one near them somehow managed to instantly catch it before it could hit the ground. “Woah!” The first one cried. The one who’d caught the fallen cup looked at rat, and also exclaimed, “Woah!”

Interested in what they were so excited about, Skizum went over to greet them, lifting a hand in a wave, and saying, “Hi.” when rat was close enough.

The two stared at rat for probably two seconds, eyes wide. These two were identical as far as Skizum could tell. Both with brown scarves, the same black shirt and pants. Even the same little green bracelet on their left hands.

Remembering what the sign rat had read, Skizum asked curiously, “So, are you Jenny Everywhere?”

“Yes,” the two chorused at the exact same time, along with half a dozen others behind them who had turned to follow the conversation. Five others answered, also simultaneously, “No.” Then, with all of them at the same time, the many who were paying attention to the conversation asked, “Who are you?”

[ID: A digital drawing traced over a photo, showing many people holding yellow plastic cups and staring at the camera in confusion and surprise. They all have the same brown skin and hair, many wearing red scarves, some blue, one gold, and one near the front wearing a traditional keffiyeh, another wearing a red hijab. Many have goggles on their foreheads or over their eyes. The background is glowing white that softly blurs the character’s edges near the back and top of the crowd. End ID.]

“Lhakhovi Skizum.” Skizum replied, and, just to be polite, even though it was just a dream, “My pronouns are rat/rats/ratself. What are yours?”

Some of them answered, “she/her/hers/herself.”, while others, including many of those who’d answered no to the question of were they Jenny Everywhere, replied various things, not all at once, though. The people who shared the same pronouns spoke at the same time, but each group who used the same pronouns waited until there was space to talk, with perfect timing.

“He/him/his/himself.” said some, “they/them/their/themself.” said others. “Ze/hir/hirs/hirself.” said a couple, “It/its/itself.” said a few. “Xey/xem/xyr/xemself.” said one, and another, “bun/buns/bunself”, and at last, “I use any pronouns except she/her.”

If this weren’t such a casual, calm, soothing dream, Skizum would have been worried about telling them all apart and matching pronouns to who when many of them seemed near-identical, but somehow rat knew that rat would be waking up before rat would be given any opportunity to accidentally misgender anyone.

“How did you get here?” this time it seemed like the whole room had turned to ask the question. Even the band had stopped playing.

Rat shrugged. “I went to bed.”

Only a few spoke this time. “Did you do anything special before you fell asleep?”

Rat shrugged with only one arm this time, just for some variety. “Well, I was reading Grimm’s Fairy Tales on my phone.” Rat said thoughtfully, “I assume that’s where my brain got these weird ideas, though nothing like this was in there so far.”

Rat had only just gotten to the end of the story about the kid who refused to take good advice from a fox.

“Well...” one person started to say. This person had the same fantasy-creature ears and tail as Skizum, almost identical to the face rat’d seen in the mirror, except for the insides of this person’s ears being bright green instead of blue. They continued, not unkindly, “Could you please wake up? You’ve somehow taken Sinéad’s place...If it helps, I promise I’ll come visit you when it’s a reasonable hour in your time zone, and I’ll explain everything from our side.”

Well, Skizum had never been asked to wake up by characters in a dream before, let alone asked so politely. It seemed like it would be a shame to say no. And besides, this way rat could write down those words from before – rat still remembered perfectly.

“Alright, that sounds fair.” Rat said, thinking it was a very funny ending to a dream. And with a few moments of thoughtful effort, rat woke ratself up, and the regular cool darkness of rats ceiling met rats gaze. A glance and fumble over for rats phone showed it was 5am.

On the notepad app, Skizum wrote down the short paragraph rat’d read, having to close one eye to bring the phone into focus at such a short distance. The app would mark the time this note was created, and it would serve as rats smug evidence to Rem that it was, in fact, possible to read in dreams.

Then rat went back to sleep, falling easily into a new, much less interesting, much less concrete dream about a baby pig that used a giant pinecone for armour…

And Skizum would have thought nothing more of the dream outside of rats continual debate with Rem, except that at 11AM the next morning, as rat was in the kitchen pouring a bowl of cereal, the doorbell rang, and, when rat went to answer, found one of the characters from rats dream last night standing there, in the daylight, in what was most certainly not a dream.

“Hi, Lhakhovi Skizum,” The creature straight out of a fantasy novel said cheerfully, proffering a giant basket of fruit and muffins, “I’m Jenni Everywhere!”

[gretavanbear]

Different Worlds - Jake Kiszka/Reader

Chapter 1: First Day

Stepping into the elevator, I press '49'. The elevator owned large mirrors on each wall, exposing me from every angle. I examined each hair out of place, my pupils were enlarged like a deer in headlights. My outfit consisted of two different shades of black, which caused self-consciousness to swarm my thoughts as I did not want to appear unprofessional. There was no music playing, only my rapid heartbeat. The sound of the doors opening snapped me out of my thoughts as I watched how calm this floor seemed. There were big windows that exposed the beautiful city below, the sun shined onto the beautiful marble floor of the gigantic open office. 

"You must be [y/n]!" A tall blonde woman stood in front of me, she had beautiful soft features and a small button nose, a nice smile and big blue eyes. I nodded and placed my hand out to shake. 

"We don't really shake here, that's a tad too formal, I'm Elizabeth." She smiled. 

"I'm [y/n]. It's nice to meet you Elizabeth. I'm so excited to be here." I replied. 

"Your energy is like" she paused, scanning me up and down with her eyes. "perfect for this place" She finished. A wave of relief travelled its way through my chest as I smiled, my cheeks burning up.

She started walking to her right, asking me to follow her, so I did. 

She led me to her office, it was beautiful. Her desk was black and so were all of her chairs and couches, it was a very large office that encapsulated sophistication and modernism. She sat down in the corner of her large L-shaped couch and pat the seat next to her, I sat two seats away. 

"Listen, [y/n], I know it's your first day but time never stops around here. I have a meeting in about ten minutes and I'd love for you to sit in and see how it all goes. Take notes and observe, and if they ask for anything like water or coffee feel free to bring it to them." She explained. Her eyes offered kindness and sympathy. 

"I know how first days go, don't worry they're super nice." She smiled. 

They? I guess her first meeting is with a band. Our meeting. Fifteen minutes pass by until we hear a knock at the door. Elizabeth was now seated at her desk, she got up and sat at the oval table in the corner of her office, pulling out a chair for me to sit next to her. "Come in!" she exclaimed loudly.

"Hey, Liz!" A tall, curly-headed man walked in, he wore a dark brown button-down shirt with loose pants. He had a nice smile. Behind him walked two men with long hair, brown eyes and slim figures. 

"Hey Josh, Sam, Daniel." Elizabeth greeted them as they walked up to the table and sat down. "Where's Jake?" She added. I was surprised that this wasn't the whole group. 

"We closed the elevator doors before he could come in with us." Josh, the curly-headed man said with a big smile.

"Oh come on" Elizabeth sighed, then smiled as she looked up from Josh's head to her door. 

"I'm sorry Liz, I was left behind. " A soft voice spoke from the entryway, I turned my head and looked up. The tall brown-eyed man with soft features smiled shyly at Elizabeth. He wore a button-down shirt, exposing half his chest, paired with skinny black jeans and really old vans shoes. They probably used to be white but they looked really old. He looked at me quickly and then sat down, avoiding eye contact. 

"So, I think you guys must be confused as to why I requested to meet with you all." Elizabeth began. "First of all, this is [y/n], she's my intern but she's also at your assistance for anything you need. Now, onto business..." She introduced me to them and then introduced them to me, then explained how the band will be announcing a small tour in the next coming weeks and they've set up a studio for them in the building a couple of floors up. Elizabeth seemed like a very organized woman, her office was dust-less, and she looked very well composed with her hair in a bun- tightly slicked back. She wore a white t-shirt with black wide-leg flowy pants and black Doc Martens. She didn't seem nervous when speaking to these guys, who also did not seem nervous. I took notes of how she delivered the news to them and highlighted the key points of the meeting, so next time I know how they go. While my pen scribbled all over the page, I could feel someone looking at me but I decided to focus on the notes since I get distracted so easily. 

The room filled with excitement as the boys learnt the news about their tour and studio. I looked at Jake, who had happened to sit directly in front of me. He kept his lips stuck together, looking down at his hands while his bandmates chatted with Elizabeth. His long brown hair hugged his frame so perfectly, even though he was tall and fit, he seemed so soft and calm. Looking at him and his bandmates, they seem like an indie band or maybe a soft indie genre. Jake had calm energy around him that could make anyone feel at ease, like a soft breeze on a fall day or the feeling of the sun beaming down on your skin. 

"Alright guys, I'm not going to keep you guys cooped up in here much longer, lets go check out the studio!" Elizabeth clapped happily. The boys rapidly got up, mirroring Elizabeth's excitement. We all walked out as a group towards the elevator from earlier. 

"So, [y/n], looks like you're stuck with us" Josh said as he looked down at me. His brown eyes watched attentively for my response. 

"More like you're stuck with me" I replied, matching Josh's energy. He smiled and laughed at my response. We all turned our heads towards the elevator as it dinged, alerting us it has arrived. I let them all enter the elevator, waiting for my turn but when I was about to enter I hear the rapid noise of clicking. Sam was pressing the 'close door' button over and over. 

"It's the 65th floor! Sam st-" I hear Elizabeth before the doors shut in front of my face. I feel myself burning up and tears welling up in my eyes out of embarrassment. I was already so nervous about today and this didn't help the feeling. I hear someone next to me clear their throat and press the 'up' button for the elevator. Jake. I looked up at him and he gave me a small closed-mouth smile but he didn't look back at me. 

"They always do that," He said softly, barely above a whisper. "Don't worry about it." He added, even softer even though it didn't feel possible.

I nodded slowly in response to him. He was taller than me, like Josh, but his presence felt bigger than mine. The elevator door opened and we walked in, he let me in first. We both went to press the '65' button, I let him do it. He turned to me after pressing the button and looked at me up and down, his eyes taking me all in. 

"You're so nervous" He spoke softly as he stepped closer, towering over me. The elevator felt small as all I could feel was the heat radiating from his body, all I could do was accept him and let him take over. His brown eyes looked deeply into mine, and his hair fell so perfectly next to his cheeks, it looked insanely soft and I wished I could touch it. 

"You shouldn't be" He added, as he stepped back and the elevator doors opened. He walked out onto the floor, which pointed straight to the studio. I breathed out after realizing I had held my breath the whole time, my heartbeat consuming the now cold air of the elevator. I felt fuzzy and out of it, almost as if Jake had possessed something from me that I would not be able to get back.

[Notes :]

Hi ! I'm Bear, the author of this fic. Just trying out something new- by transferring this from ao3 (format is getting a tad bit too complicated for me) Please let me know what you think of it so far!

Thank you :)

[ticklishtoms]

c!tommy s1 headcanons!!

last updated; December 20, 2023

last updated: boundaries

Main blog: @strangleetomz

general headcanons:

He uses he/xey/they pronouns

He keeps a l’manberg flag with him

During Pogtopia, Wilbur gave Tommy one of his coats. Tommy has never let the coat leave his sight. Ever.

Transgender ftm

He always wears a flower crown, Ranboo & Tubbo made it for him.

After his revival, he got a white streak like wilbur. Unlike Wilbur, however, he got a demon tail & horns.

he used to cut his hair with safety scissors from his dysphoria as a kid

Dream marked him with a smile in exile, so its scarred.

He rarely ever puffs out his wings

His wings flap when hes happy/excited:]

his demon tail sways / wags along with his flapping wings whenever hes excited or happy

He rarely takes off the bandana Tubbo gave him. He’s owned it for nearly 10 years —hes 18, tubbo gave it to him when they were nine— and xey have taken it off a total of probably 9 times, so once a year. He only took it off those times because Wilbur insisted on letting him wash it because it was stained and gross.

appearance headcanons

Fluffy blonde curls

His hair is very messy due to often cutting it with safety scissors & it not really growing back properly.

His wardrobe consists of those red and white shirts, some short sleeved some long sleeved. He has Wilbur’s coat from pogtopia, and a blue sweater that ghostbur made xem during exile. When it comes to shoes, he’s either wearing laced platform boots or red converse that look anything but new (the converse are what he wore during exile.) He refuses to get new ones. Pants-wise? Light brown / tan cargo pants, or black ripped jeans. He has chains for his pants & belts. He has black sweatpants, but almost never wears them. He has a blue sweater with daisy’s embroidered on it, xey made it with Ghostbur in exile.

Dark green bandana from Tubbo — used to be bright green, darkened color is a result of hardly ever washing it.

Flower crown from Tubbo & Ranboo

Devil horns & tail from revival

White streak from revival.

He’s got multiple scars on his face. He’s proud of them all because they’re from wars— except one, his smile scar. It’s from Dream during one of his exile visits

He’s got black wings, just like Phil. They’re just as big as Phil’s are, however he keeps them folded down at his back so they appear smaller.

He has bags under xeir eyes because they often don’t get much sleep from nightmares about exile. He can’t remember the last time he’s gotten a good nights sleep.

He has bandages on his hands / wrists and right under one of his knees

More often then not, he’s wearing the red and white t-shirt with a white long sleeve shirt underneath light brown cargo pants, practically ruined red converse, a flowercrown, and the bandana tubbo gave him.

Burn scars from the prison lava on both of his arms

ler headcanons:

MEAN. /LH/POS

He can and WILLL point out his lee’s reactions. Like snorting, squealing, etc.

He is so teasy oml

Absolutely will compliment his lee.

If you’re mean (“shut up!” “fuck you” etc) He will immediately target any of ur worst spots

He slows down at some points to check on his lee, see if theyre done or if they want to continue

he is great at soft / gentle / comfort tickles. one of the best fr

his fav lees r definitely tubbo, ranboo, wilbur & phil

he can only say tickle if hes ler.

absolutely does aftercare. Includes cuddles, playing with the lee’s hair, etc etc.

He will pin his lee down, if their comfortable with it. And if hes feeling extra mean, xey’ll hold the lee’s arms above their head.

He’s not offen ler but when he is. Well. Rest in peace/lh

He WILL use his wings if he deems so necessary.

lee headcanons:

pls just give this poor kid some tkls

provoking brat /lh

he’ll jokingly insult you, say “you’ve lost tommy talking privleges” & then ignore you, stretch infront of you, maybe even just tickle you Anything for him to get tkls

Prefers being lee over ler, its like a stress reliever to him. and he loves to smile and laugh. Xey love the tickly sensations no matter how much they protest against it

When recieving rougher / playful tkls, he’s very loud. Shrieky laughter, lots of squirming, squealing, etc

But when he recieves softer / gentle / sleepy tkls, you will have a melted puddle/hj of blushy giggly tommy infront of you. Giggling, barely moving at all, and soft squeals peppered in his giggling

fav lers are ranboo, tubbo, wilbur, phil, & quackity, :D

sweetest boy ever Pls someone give him the tkls he deserves

The embodiment of “can’t take what they dish out”

Safe word typically is red, because its xeir favorite color.

STIMS!!! THEY HAPPY STIM WHEN XEIR TICKLED

Definitely tries getting away even though not wanting it to stop, it’s just instinct. They dont like that its xeir instinct

tail sways / wags whenevr hes tickled :D will be very flustered if you point it out SO POINT IT OUT

Tickle monster tease makes him squeal and giggle. He cannot handle this tease, its so flustering to him. He’s embarrassed about how much it gets to xem because “its childish” but they still love it as flustering as it is SO USE THIS TEASE ON XEM!!

cannot say ‘tickle’ for the life of xem. So in place of sayibg ‘it tickles’ he will say ‘it feels funny’ and sometimes maybe ‘it feels weird’

xey LOVE raspberries, nibbles, and tickle kisses/p. Loves them.

Literally a walking tickle spot, it’s adorable

He has high stamina. It takes a lot for xem to actually safe word.

spot hc’s:

face: 1.8, like i said walking tickle spot Anyway he’ll giggle if you just lightly trace around xeir jawline or cheeks.

head: 2.5/10, believe it or not his head’s ticklish. he loves head scratches but depending how do you do it xey’ll giggle quietly and duck their head.

horns: 2.7/10! trace the base of xeir horns and they’ll be a melty giggly mess, very adorable :]

wings: 3/10, ticklish, just not much,, The most you’ll probably get is flinching & light giggling. Wings flap when tickled :D

arms: meltyyy very melty spot 4/10 small lil titters and flinches, and xey are very embarrassed that their arms are ticklish. If you rake ur fingers up and down xeir arms or trace around their elbow he’ll let out a small squeal and try to pull xeir arm away. Trace the burn scars and you’ll get melty giggly blushy Tommy :D

hands/palms: 4/10 This one definitelyyy depends on how ur tickling. Like if ur jus wiggling ur fingers or tracing the palms, you’re gonna have blushy giggly Tommy. If you blow a raspberry on the palm(s), he’ll squeal and giggle while —trying to— repeatedly putting his hands into fists. Kissing/p his knuckles puts xem in a huge fit of giggles, he’ll whine but they love it

back: 6/10 ! This is a good spot for gentle tickles if you’re trying to get xem to sleep, calm down from something etc. But it can alsooo be a bad spot for them:]

shoulders: 6/10!! same as the neck, just not as bad. high pitched giggles & scrunching up to try and get rid of the feeling but inevitably making it worse. If you blow a raspberry here he’ll squeal, if his hands are free xey’ll reach back to push you away

neck/ears: 6.7/10! melt spot if light tickles are used, but if u blow a raspberry, nibble or give platonic tickly kisses he’ll squeal and laugh very loudly. Just normal/playful tickles = massive giggle fit, their ears often go bright red when tickled if they weren’t already bright red beforehand

Sides: 7.5/10! This isn’t necessarily a horrible spot, if you start out only targetting his sides theres a chance xey’ll be able to hold out on you pretty well. Raspberries here will make him break immediately. And if you catch them by suprise—randomly squeezing or tasering xeir sides without warning— then he wont be able to hold out as well

ribs: 8/10, badbadbaddd!!/pos he will squeal and absolutely LOVES HATES rib counting. Upper rib tickles are the best worst. Any tickles on his ribs make him squeal, shriek, and squirm.

thighs/knees: 8/10, squeezing up and down will get them to squeal and kick his legs, lots of loud bubbly laughter !! scribbling on the back of xeir knees will make them kick up their legs so be careful— unless u want kicked in the face/lh

underarms: 8.5/10, bad spot, but not the worst !! definitely some loud laughter & if u vibrate ur fingers after hes trapped them xey’ll probably shriek. Most of the time he’ll have trouble bringing his arms up so you may actually have to stop for a bit for xem to put them back up

Hips: 9.5/10! Bad spot, but also a favorite! If u squeeze their hips xey’ll squeal n shriek. Raspberries here are killerrr but he loves it! If you’re targeting here to try and get them to move xeir arms away from another spot or trying to get him to bring his arms down, nibbles are probably the only way to get xem to do it.

Tummy: 100/10!!! worst spott! But its their FAVORITE spot. if u wiggle ur fingers above xeir tummy he’ll suck in his stomach and cover his face in anyway possible. Raspberries are KILLER but he LOVES IT. Xey love raspberries, nibbles & platonic kisses here. He loves it all. Raspberries & nibbles here make xem snort as well !! His tummy is probably one of the only places that’ll actually get him to safeword but xey have high stamina so they can last a whileee. As much as its their worst spot, he also loves gentle tickles here. If xey ask for gentle tickles, he’ll often ask for you to give them on his tummy. It’s adorable.

Tum button: 101/10 I had to do a seperate one for this even tho its pretty much the same as the one above. Had to. Anyway! If u dip ur finger in xeir tum button he’ll squeal, but if you stay targetting it for more than just 3 seconds, it’ll make them start to snort. It’s adorable. If you blow a raspberry or nibble the rim of his navel he will shriek and thrash, and if you’re not holding xeir hands up xey’ll push at ur head. Just poking his tum button makes xem squeal. Calling it a giggle button will make him flustered, however considering this spot makes him snort quite a lot calling it a snort button is a bit worse than giggle button.

those two were a little lengthy mb totally not cause its based off me. totallynnot.

BOUNDARIES

NO NSFW. THIS IS A SFW BLOG, I AM A MINOR. NSFW DNI!!

Keep feet tickles to a MINIMUM. If they are to happen keep it like very short (like a one sentence thing) & I am only comfortable being on the receiving end. Keep it to a MINIMUM.

no lick tickles or whatever tf theyre called. thats just . No.

No stocks or tools. ‘Tools’ im only fine with if its attached to your characters body, example being wings or tail. Only fine with pinning & holding his arms up with hands. No machines no ropes no brushes or anything like that Nothing nada none of it.

please do not constantly remind me to reply. if i cant think of a response or i simply do not want to respond, i wont. dont rush me/lh/srs

im not very comfortable with like, sudden or out of nowhere angst or panic or anything like that . im less likely to respond as often if this happens cause i dont really know what to do for it

[helllords]

Lucifer. Emperor of hell. Lord of pride.

-> You are pride. You are the belief that your own strength, your own worth surpasses God and, in turn, you fell from the pinnacle you were once granted. You were once Its favorite, now easily replaced by measily humans who cannot compare to your might at all. You will eradicate them all, send them to hell, and laugh as God weeps for Its children lost to temptation. - Appears as a man in his late 20s with white hair and black eyes. - 6'1". - Demiromantic and demisexual. - Has burn marks all the way from his shoulders to his hips from where his wings have been ripped from him. - Arrogant.

FC: Otto Seppalainen.

Beelzebub. Queen of the barren lands. Lord of gluttony. Lord of flies.

-> You are gluttony. You are the excess of food at a table and the desire to ravish it all, to want more. The sensation of teeth sinking into flesh and tearing it apart. You are the rich, fat man sneering down the hungering child. You are the devourer of souls and, under Lucifer and Abaddon, the oldest demon to reign. - Appears as a woman in her mid 20s with long, wavy blond hair and black eyes. - 5'6". - Panromantic and pansexual. - Unhinged. Will laugh and beg you to let her eat you. Fun-loving.

FC: Imogen Poots.

Asmodeus. King of demons. Lord of lust.

-> You are temptation, the first evil, the glimmering and shimmering of the snake's scales in the light of paradise. You are lechery, you are beautiful. - Appears as a man in his 40s with grey hair and bright green eyes. - 6'3". - Panromantic and pansexual. He's the lord of lust, he has no preferences. - Slender limbs and slow, smooth movements. It's almost as though he wants to entrance you with his very existence. - Easily amused. Charming. Oddly easy-going. A composure that is very difficult to break.

FC: Mads Mikkelsen.

Mammon. Queen of the gates. Lord of greed.

-> You are greed. You are the violent desire to claim everything with your insatiable fingertips. You are the guard that turns a blind eye when gold is slipped into his pocket. You are the priest that promises salvation for the sinners in turn for small donation. - Appears as a woman in her late 30s with blond hair and brown eyes that almost look red in the sun. - 6'2". - Pansexual and demiromantic. - Strict. Relentless. Diligent.

FC: Elizabeth Debicki.

Leviathan. King of the four rivers of hell. Lord of envy.

-> You were the snake in the garden, envious of humans, agreeing with Lucifer and Abaddon to persuade them to commit the first sin. The first beast of hell. You were the most ruthless, paralyzing fear of sinner and sailor alike, claiming the oceans and seas as your throne, decorating the floors with ship wrecks, with bones before the devil gave you a crown. - Appears as a man in his early 30s with black hair and striking pale blue eyes. Very muscular. - 6'6". - Demiromantic and demisexual. - Very serious. Possessive. Could and probably would crush you at any given moment.

FC: Akash Kumar.

Belphegor. King of the forest of hell. Lord of sloth.

-> You are sloth. You are the lazy flick of a hand as you easily dismiss your tasks. An apathy towards anything. You are the soldier that half-heartedly keeps watch and ends up having his comrade killed. You are heavy blankets and unbothered eyes. You are Hypnos, god of sleep but much, much more merciless. - Appears a man in his early 20s with brown hair and reddish brown eyes. - 5'8". - Panromantic and pansexual. - Oddly peaceful and patient. Almost serene and unassuming if it weren't for the dark glint in his eyes.

FC: Tamino Amir.

Abaddon. King of the bottomless pit. Lord of wrath. Lord of deals.

-> You are wrath. Born from the flames of Lucifer's anger, you are his first demon and right hand. You are the spark and the fire that consumes you whole and moves fists. You are bared teeth, spats words, shared bruises. - Appears as a man in his early 40s with black hair and bright green eyes. -6'0". - Panromantic and pansexual. - Tempting and charming but also incredibly manipulative and sadistic.

FC: Cillian Murphy. His kids can be found here.

[tv-sinner]

4, 18, 26, 31 and 43!

4. A character you rarely talk about?

Hmmm.. I guess it would have to be some of my more brand new ocs (aka ones that aren’t even developed enough to have a tag on here yet!). A lot the ocs I had on my previous oc aesthetic blog are either in oc purgatory or in the process of getting revamped entirely. Some are so new that i have yet to draw them, much less talk about them. But for now, I’ll focus on one who I haven’t drawn yet from VITW verse: Adira, a butch dandelion rogue who has a love-hate/lovers AND enemies relationship with the strawberry monster huntress, St. Wickam.

Adira was disgraced knight who now wanders the wilderness as a thief and mercenary. She often finds herself crossing paths with the high-strung strawberry and she’s made it her personal mission to play with her and to steal her heart (literally or metaphorically? Whatever happens first). Wickam was initially charmed by her but she soon realized that Adira stole her money and they’ve been getting into homoerotic fights about it (and many other instances of them messing with each other) ever since. Their relationship is.. complicated. And neither are ready to admit to themselves or each other that they have romantic feelings for each other. And that’s all I have for now. 🫡

18. Any OC crackships?

Two words: Archdemon Polycule… Or more accurately, separate polycules that have overlap with some members but not all of them are involved with each other. Here’s a visual aid I drew for this weird ass poly ship:

All Roads Lead to Asmodeus. Would this polycule be an absolute disaster of a relationship? Yes. Do I think it would actually work out? No, I doubt it would last for very long, especially when infernal politics come into the mix… Not to mention that they tend to bicker with each other a lot. Would it at least be entertaining to watch this particular polycule crash and burn? Yes. This will never happen in canon but it would be funny if it did.

26. Have you ever had to change your OC’s design or something else about them against your will?

Not exactly? The only thing that kinda made me change things about my ocs against my Will was probably the existence of H*zbin H*tel/H*lluva B*ss. For a while, I stepped away from my Hell/Heaven story partly because of its popularity/fandom and me wanting to distance myself from it, which included my own story about Hell. I would elaborate further, but there’s a time and place for being a hater and it isn’t here lol. The other, more major reason was that I had a crisis of faith in my artistic and writing ability was also having at the same time I was vocally beefing with these series on tumblr.

31. Pick one OC of yours and explain what their tumblr blog would be like (what they reblog, layout, anything really)

I can think of a few ocs who would actually have a tumblr blog.. I think the most interesting of which would be Archdemon Belphegor’s tumblr blog(s). I’d imagine she’d have several blogs: her main (memes, occasionally posts about her inventive work, plushies, science posts), a blog dedicated to programming and maybe game dev, an aesthetic blog based on 90s computers and video games, and a separate NSFW blog not connected to her main. I’d imagine she’d take the time to make her own custom layout and across the board, they’d all have old computer desktop/old video game vibes. She posts pretty frequently and she sometimes slacks off on her work to check her socials, including tumblr.

43. Do you have any certain type when you create your OCs? Do you tend to favour some certain traits or looks? It’s time to confess

Oh definitely. For one, I typically give my ocs curly/wavy hair, usually dark hair (brown or black). I rarely give them blonde or ginger hair. And even my ocs who have gray hair now were brunettes in their youth. I tend to give my ocs non-straight hair because I find drawing hair with a lot of volume/defined shapes to be more fun than just straight hair.

Aside from that, I tend to make my ocs fat, mostly because I’m fat myself! And a vast majority of my ocs end up with long lashes since I tend to just. Give them obvious lashes, regardless of gender. What can I say? Lashes look great.