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#ive been home sick yesterday and today
mctwilight-mcd · 2 years
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Screaming and doing a lil dance.
I DID IT!!!!!! I FINISHED IT!!!
Amphibia au stuff! I’ve been writing a bit of a story for a while called Call Me Back To You. The basic premise is this:
18 year olds, Anne, Sasha and Marcy are using the Calamity Box to transport to Newtopia Castle when the portal goes haywire. The three are split and thrown into the past, ending up with their younger counterparts the night of Hop Till You Drop. With no apparent way home and a half explanation from their deity, the guardian, they start to realise differences between this timeline and their own. 
Helping their younger counterparts along the way, the calamity warriors of the future must fix the timeline, rejoin as a group, maybe set up the younger three along the way and find a way back home. Although, revealing too much or changing traumatizing events could ruin their chances at making it home forever.
I’ll post a wip tmrw for wip wednesday. I might also do posters like these for the other two pairs. Hope you like it!
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raeathnos · 8 months
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#apparently I’m not done being mad about this I’m sorry guys I gotta vent#my dad is like an ox and never sick and like not very understanding with health issues/general illness#which you’d think he would have been after having me the super sickly child with a ton of health issues but no#we have a positive Covid case in the house and I have the same fucking symptoms I just started later#I have taken two tests- one yesterday and one today#and he yelled at me saying I’m wasting tests and also that I’m apparently fine which like#even if I somehow don’t catch covid I’m still sick but okay dad 🫠#if it helps put things into a better perspective… did yall know that back in November after I had my 3rd fucking endometriosis surgery#he asked why I was off work for two weeks and why I didn’t go back the day after surgery?#like I had had this surgery twice before and at home recovery was also two weeks both those times#but moreover like sir I have 3 incisions in my abdomen and my job requires me to left 50lbs???#at which point he still insisted I was fine and was just being ‘dramatic’ 🙃#I wanna fucking scream#I’m lissed the fuck off#did yall know he nearly got me killed once because I had neurovirus and he refused to take me to the er?#I eventually lost consciousness from severe dehydration- he thought I was sleeping and continued to argue with my mom that I was fine 🫠#they eventually took me but I was unconscious for several hours and it took five bags of iv fluid for me to regain consciousness#and the doctor estimated I was about two hours away from death so like#yeah#if that gives yall a better idea of the shit I’m putting up with#I have like zero tolerance for dealing with his bullshit when I’m sick#it’s the trauma from not fucking being believed for years of my life about any of my illnesses#and like also the fucking almost dying part#fun times 🫠#I’m sorry I’m ranting so much today I’m just really fucking done and have no other outlet 🙃
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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#i truely have so much anger built up inside me about my job. ive done a very good job of making it unbearable#and after taking a 10 day vacation. plus 2 days of not working bc im sick. i really dont wanna go back#i was planning to take 3 days to not do fucking anything but my boss just emailed me with some time sensitive#logistical things. so like i guess i gotta fucking do that tomorrow. i started reading the email and it made my head hurt#and she started it off like. hopw ur feeling better and i dont wanna cause stress but...#like bro. listen. if u tell me these things u put them in my head and i csnt stop thinking abt them until theyre done. and its not her#fault bc im the one that put myself in a place where im barely keeping it together. its just frustrating#bc it feels like hope u feel better but also kill urseld 💖 but again thats just how it feels bc im so. idk how to describe it im like in a#state of post burnout. im sitting in the ash. alone in a desolate landscape and its like jesus how tf do i fix this?#and i cant even run out my anger rn bc im sick. and i mean i have the energy to run i dont feel lethargic but like i doubt that would aid#recovery lol. ugh. 2 months. thats all. then i move away. assuming i find a place to live lol. bc i currently haven't yet#but whatever. assuming i get better quickly and dont get worse and dont get covid on top of this cold bc my dad got covid#it will have been a bit of a blessing i came back sick bc i have a clear justification for not working and for telling people to fuck off#when they ask for things from me. like today a lab mate asked if i could sample Monday. which it technically#a holiday but i probably would have said yes if i wasnt sick. and i would have had to teach undergrads some bullshit friday if i wasnt sick#instead i just did nothing all day bc i almost moved bsck my flight and didnt leave home until the weekend anyway#i guess its good i didnt bc then i would have been stuck in ohio bc my dad found out he had covid yesterday#idk its all just frustrating bc im halfway in a transition and im not doing very well but i cant do anything to fix things until i leave#the southwest. like i dont even kno if i have health insurance rn. my benifits change request was processed but like does thst mean it was#approproved? fucking idk. so everytime i do anything i imagine a worstcase scenario where i end up hospitalized and damned to an empty#bank account or eternal medical debt. tho my mum said they passed a law where they arnt allowed to do thst to u anymore 🤷‍♂️#whatever. im annoyed. i dont wanna work 😫#unrelated
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everything is perfect and everything is horrible
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be-good-to-bugs · 6 months
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hey what if i like, didn't have a headache right now. that idea sounds cool we should do that idea.
#the bin#ack. i cant like. do anything.#i want to draw right now but i cant cause of this :/#the screen hurts my eyes and the leaning over makes it worse. and the leaning from traditional art is SO BAD.#hhh. i hope it will go away soon but i dont think it will. im feeling stomach sick too so i cant take ibuprofen either. sad.#i didnt end up getting to call my mom yesterday. i was SO tired probably because i had a 2 hour panic attack and it was past when#id been going to sleep anyway so i fell asleep. today should be more idea bc i stayed in bed till kinda late.#im really nervous. theres other stuff stressing me too like lending a bunch of money to my sister again. i dont have a lot right now and i#will need some extra for moving costs regardless of if i stay here or get to go home. supposedly she will return it in a week#its not for her technically. its for her boyfriends rent. if it was for her i probably wouldnt have tbh bc she sucks SO MUCH about this#stuff. i do have the money and i get it. i dont know him but its not a problem for me as long as i get it back very soon#ive lent a couple smaller amounts to him before and he was quick to get it back. and he always offers to send back more which i dont care#about but like. he gets that im not REALLY in a position to be able to do this. im still stressed the fuck out tho.#my body hurts so bad all the time. im glad i get time off this week but god damn.#i was gonna use it to clean but idk if my body is gonna let me. well. at least one of the days it will have to.#i hope i get good news today when i talk to her. i wanna stop having to stress so bad about this
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HEHRHE WORK RANT 😐
#.....the owners came to visit last week ❤️ while i was gone ❤️#and apparently ❤️ hated the bakery ❤️#bc its too messy. which i agree with. but its been messy since i started this is NOT my mess#in fact ive cleaned it up IMMENSELY. its 100x better than when i started#and OFC they came the ONE time i had transfers sent back 😐 bc they weren't perfect 😐#and they weren't perfect and im sorry! but i was lowkey rushing that day bc i was trying to prepare to take a week off#actually. i stayed almost an hour late. i am sorry they weren't perfect and i re did them yesterday.#but i dont live for this job?? i have to go home??#hahahahahah the manager was supposed to be here yesterday but he was sick. he wasn't supposed to be here today. he is.#which is why i know the owners said stuff bc he told me#and he said hes gonna help me clean today. and that im doing good. and that he told them a lot of stuff was messy before i was here.#which is nice#im just!!! not a messy baker!!!! it bothers me too!! i was the clean one in school :(#and?? the owners visited one time when The Other Baker still worked here. i wasn't there for that either#but i noticed she had cleaned more than usual lol and it still wasn't as clean as i have it now!!!#and they left a note that said 'the bakery looks great!' ?????????#SOOO????? thats why i haven't cleaned as much as i would prefer bc idk how particular they are#it was like this before are they just fine with it being kinda messy??? do they not want me to spend time cleaning??#ugshdbjadvsjs idk its annoying#i dont wanna give all these excuses like I DIDN'T DO IT!!! but lowkey. i didn't skdnks
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ech0light · 2 years
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*gripping sides of sink* its okay to take days off *yelling through angry sobs* you cant function to the best of your abilities if youre sick *coughing up blood* it doesnt make you a bad person to take care of yourself
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Pairing : Seo Changbin x F!Reader & Yang Jeongin x F!Reader TW : For Changbins : reader has type 2 diabetes ; ketoacidosis (is that a TW? Well it is now, it seems like it should be a warning) ; vomiting ; hospitals ; Changbin is still just a big sweetheart that cares too much ; IV's ; reader in a coma ; For Jeongins : reader has arrhythmia (irregular heartbeat) ; and potentially undiagnosed type 2 diabetes ; Jeongin has no clue so is therefore seemingly insensitive ; reader fainting ; Jeongin ending redemption ; Word Count : For Changbins : 4.6k For Jeongins : 4.1k (in total : 8.7k) Request : @maruskz @slayhyunjin & 4 other anons, the reader doesn't feel well!! A/N : THIS ONE IS FOR YOU ALL!! IT'S THE LAST ONE IN THE LINEUP!! I HOPE YOU ENJOY IT!! Thank you to the person in my comments who let me know I (and google) goofed up. I will try to be as accurate as possible when writing about any type of disease, so please let me know in the comments if I'm wrong.
Changbin
“I'm gonna go to the gym with Chan after work, but I should be back home before dinner time.” Changbin said as he pulled his t-shirt on over his head, smiling at you as you laid in the bed still, your eyes still heavy although he chalked it up to you tossing and turning all night and having to get out of bed every couple hours to use the bathroom. “Do you have enough medicine to get you through the day? I can stop at the pharmacy before I go to the gym and drop it off to you.” 
Your head shook in response as you let out a long yawn, sitting up in bed but immediately falling back as your vision momentarily went hazy, which you attributed to sitting up too fast. “I have enough… Thank you Binnie. I gotta work today anyway, so if I need my medicine I can stop by the pharmacy on the way home.” You murmured and he sighed softly, dropping down onto the bed beside you, his hand brushing lightly over your cheeks before leaning in to kiss you. 
“You know I don’t like you walking to the store by yourself…” He reminded you, his bottom lip jutting out into a little pout and you playfully swiped your finger over it causing him to chuckle softly. “Plus you said that you weren’t feeling well… you shouldn’t be going to work like that. You can just stay home and rest… You need to rest, babe.” Bin had been your biggest caregiver since he found out you had diabetes, but not only was he the best caregiver, but supported you through it all, changing his diet as much as he could so that you didn’t feel like you were missing out on good meals, texting you every hour on the hour to check how you were feeling and to make sure you were taking your medicine. He was just as good as any doctor, and you felt safe knowing that you had him. 
“Bin, I’m fine.” You reassured him, grabbing his hand and locking your fingers with his. “I need to go to work… I called out yesterday. I’m not trying to lose my job.” You explained, sitting up more slowly this time and then immediately resting your head against his shoulder. 
“When was the last time you threw up?” He questioned, and you knew that his reasoning for questioning you was valid and it all came from his genuine care for you, it made you feel bad in a way, knowing that he probably spent more time worrying about you than about himself. “I feel like I heard you get sick in the middle of the night…” 
“And you did… But that was the last time I got sick.” You said as cheerfully as you could. “It was probably just some 24 hour stomach bug, I’m totally okay. Now go to work before Chan calls me up and yells at me for making you late.” You kissed along his shoulder, giggling softly at the way he’d purposely flex his muscles whenever you did. “I love you Bin…” 
“I love you too…” He whispered, tilting your head up so he could kiss you correctly, his lips held against yours just a little bit longer than usual as his eyes closed. You could tell that he was worried, but you were adamant, and he knew the one thing you hated was to be coddled because of your disease… But he couldn’t help it, although he tried his best. “Call me if you need anything… Or if you start feeling sick. I’ll rush home… I love you so much, babe.” 
Going to work really was on your agenda for the day, you had even texted your boss to let her know you were coming. Sure, you felt a little tired still, but you attributed that to the fact that you had woken up in the middle of the night to throw up a couple times and it just took a toll on you. You truly thought that you were better, that is, until Changbin was gone and you got up to make yourself breakfast, everything was laid out perfectly on the counter, you were about to start cooking, but, without warning, your body had different ideas and you ended up doubled over the sink, throwing up the lack of contents in your empty stomach. 
You couldn’t seem to catch your breath which put you into panic mode which inevitably made you hyperventilate even more. The entire room seemed to go hazy, or maybe it was just your vision, and it sucked that by the time you came to realize what was going on, you were too late. 
It was hard enough as it was to try to think, it was like every single thought that you once had in your mind was gone, the only thing you felt or could think about was panicking. Your legs gave out and you fell to the floor, and it was like falling against the hard tile had shaken you enough to have you pulling out your phone and dialing the police. Before it could even finish getting through the first ring though, your vision went blank, your thoughts were gone, everything went black…
“I’m just gonna go home and check on her, she hasn’t answered any of my texts.” Changbin informed Chan as they walked down the hall together. It’s not that it was unlike you to be so busy at work that you were late to respond, it’s just that with the way you were feeling the night before, he just wanted to make sure you were okay. “I’ll meet you at the gym.” 
“Nah, I’ll go with you, just in case you need me.” And it’s not that anything in Changbins words had made the oldest feel that way, he just felt like he should be there. “Plus I haven’t seen her in a while, you never bring her into the studio anymore.” 
“Well she has her doctor's appointments and then she has to work…” He explained as he climbed into the elevator, holding it open for Chan before pressing the button to go down to the main floor. “I always tell her that she doesn’t have to work… I think she just feels like that’s the one thing in her life that she has control of… I don’t want to take that away from her.” 
Chan nodded understandingly, he knew all about your conditions, all of the guys did. Changbin was very upfront about it, letting them all know that there would be days that he wouldn’t make it into work on time so he could go to appointments with you, and there would also be days that he wouldn’t come in at all because you needed him more than the group did. You were always and would always be Changbins top priority, and everyone was well aware of that. They didn’t mind, they saw how happy you made him, and they knew that if anything would ever happen to you, they’d end up losing him anyway. 
“I thought she was going to the gym with you on her days off… Did she stop?” Chan posed the question as he pushed through the front doors to the building, holding it open for Changbin and then following him down to the car. “We could have a gym double date or something?” 
Changbins nose crinkled at the thought, and then he chuckled lightly, shaking his head. “Y/Ns just been feeling tired lately. I don’t want to push her. We take morning walks together and the doctor said that was enough until her energy comes back. They did switch her medicine recently, so that might be it.” He climbed into the drivers side and waited for Chan to get in before starting up the car. “I hope she packed herself a lunch, she shouldn’t be eating the junk they sell near her work… I should have packed her a lunch before I left.” 
“You think too much, too pessimistic…” Chan mused, leaning back in the seat and glancing over at Changbin who seemed too lost in his thoughts right now. “You do a lot for her, not because you have to, but because you want to, because you love her… There’s not a lot of men who wouldn’t do that…” 
“Well those men are assholes.” Changbin stated matter-of-factly, stopping at the red light that would have him turning down the street to home. “She deserves all the love in the world, maybe more… I wish I could give her every ounce of my love… I’d give her my entire heart…” 
Chan pursed his lips, nodding along to what he was saying as he watched the familiar houses scroll past the window until he pulled into the driveway. “When does she usually go to work? She might already be there…” Chan mused when he saw that there was a package on the front step. 
“Maybe they called her in early?” Changbin mumbled as he climbed out of the car, running up to the front porch and picking up the box before letting himself in. It wasn’t rare, in actuality it was quite annoyingly frequent that you were called in at a moments notice, usually going into work with an empty stomach, leaving Changbin to panic the entire time you were gone. “I hate when they do that to her…” 
“It looks like she was in the middle of cooking something… or about to cook something at least.” Chan commented as he followed Changbin into the house, noticing the ingredients that were scattered around the counter, the sink not exactly running, but it was still dripping. “Looks like she left in a hurry.” 
Changbin groaned loudly, pulling out the trash bin and dumping everything that littered the counter into it before slamming his hand down against the sink faucet to stop the incessant dripping. “I don’t care how much of a hurry she’s in… She shouldn’t leave the house like this.” He grumbled, looking around at the knives and the cutting board that were partially used. “It’s that damn job… She’s so scared of losing it… And they know that. They hold it above her head… And she won’t listen to me… It’s ridiculous. But to leave the kitchen looking like this!” His hands flew up in the air in disbelief before coming back down, slapping against the counter top. “You know what… I’m going to her work. I need to talk to someone… They’re completely taking advantage of her.” 
Chan awkwardly chewed on his bottom lip, partially regretting coming along for the little journey that Changbin was now taking him on, but he hoped that being there himself would at least help him to be level headed enough to be as calm as possible. “Just… Don’t make a scene… And don’t try to jump across the counter, okay? We can talk about things like adults… Can’t we?” 
Changbin rolled his eyes, not even answering the question as he walked out the door and climbed back in the car. The kitchen was disgusting, but he could never actually be mad at you, not at all… You were too innocent, and you’d never think that your work was doing exactly what Changbin knew they were doing. That’s why he wanted to talk to them specifically, whoever had called you in… “Oh I’m gonna talk about things… It’s up to them whether we keep things cordial though. Taking advantage of my girl like that? Not gonna happen! Not anymore!” 
Chan knew that Changbin was an excellent driver, he was safe, he followed all the traffic rules, he’d drive with him whenever he felt he needed to… But not today. Changbin was pissed, and a driving, pissed off Changbin threw all of his cares to the wind. Traffic rules did not exist, and the other drivers abided by whatever rules Changbin came up with on the spot. “You know, if you get pulled over… You won’t be able to talk to anyone except the police.” Chan tried to remind her, but Changbin wasn’t listening to anything but the sound of the engine revving as he whipped around a couple other cars before pulling-very badly-into a parking spot right in front of your work. “There are going to be so many cops around your car when you get out of the store, oh my god.” 
“As long as I get to finish with this conversation before they pull me out of the store, then fine.” Changbin said as he climbed out, his muscles tensed, the irritation just radiating around him. Chan was hesitant, but he knew that following him into the store would be the best course of action, so he did, but he did stay a little further behind, watching from a distance as Changbin walked up to the counter. “Alright… Where is she!? I know she had to work today and to be honest, she might say it, but I’m getting real fucking sick and tired of you taking advantage of her niceness and her willingness to work.” 
The man at the counter was visibly confused as he looked around himself and then back at Changbin. “Uhm… dude… I don’t know what… Or who you’re talking about…” He mumbled, peering around Changbin to see the person waiting behind him. “But if you’re not buying anything… Can you get out of the line?” 
Changbin turned around, smiling kindly to the stranger behind him, but the smile fell just as quickly when he turned back around to face the man at the register. “I know you called Y/N in today! Where is she, huh? You got her doing some backroom stocking shit right now?! You know she can’t do that! She didn’t even get to finish making her meal because you guys always call her in! It’s bullshit! Why have a damn schedule if you’re just gonna text her and tell her you need her earlier?” 
“What are you talking about?” The man, now having harvested a little bit of sass to stand up to Changbin, who was still much bigger than the guy. “Y/N isn’t even here right now. She totally flaked on her hours, and the manager has been trying to get a hold of her but she hasn’t answered. How about you try calling her instead of coming in here and causing a scene and scaring away our customers.” The guy impatiently tapped his fingers against the counter before motioning with his head for Changbin to move. “Can you go now?” 
If you weren’t at work… And you weren’t at home… Where the hell were you? His anger dissipated and quickly turned to worry. Your medicine was running out, but you had told him that you had enough to get you through the day. You were feeling sick the night before, but you claimed it was just a stomach bug and that you were feeling fine now. It’s not like you would leave him… He never gave you any reason to do something like that… Right? 
“Maybe you should call the neighbors… See if they know anything?” Chan suggested as he and Changbin sat in the car, still parked in front of the store, and shockingly enough, there wasn’t a single officer in sight to get on Changbin about his reckless driving. That was a good thing though, clearly Changbin wasn’t in the mood or in the right state of mind to handle that kind of interaction. “Or maybe the police station or the hospital… See if any calls came in from your address?” 
Changbin nodded, the movement kind of stiff as he pulled out his phone. He didn’t know where to start, but he also didn’t know the neighbors number, not by heart, and most of them had work today and they weren’t home. He didn’t want to have to call the hospital because that was the last place he wanted you to be, but it was the only option he had, the only line he had to hold on to right now.  
The call was short, and for the first time the entire day, Changbin had been almost completely silent, only giving out the address and then a series of mumbled out acknowledgements were heard before the silence that followed once the call was ended. It was a scary silence though, one that held far too much emotion, and although Changbin hadn’t said anything, Chan could feel it. “So… What did they-” 
There wasn’t a chance to finish as Changbins fists came down on the steering wheel, punching against it repeatedly as tears began to trickle down his cheeks, his screams cut off by his sobs. Chan didn’t know what to do, but he felt like he should try to stop him, mainly because the steering wheel looked like it would break off and neither of them needed that to happen. “Don’t touch me! Don’t!” Changbin shouted when Chan tried to grab his arms, but it had stopped his assault on the wheel momentarily, his head falling forward as his body shook. 
“Changbin…” Chan said breathlessly, falling back against the seat and staring up at the roof of the car. “I don’t know what the hell is going on… But you can’t just beat up the car. If you want me to take you to the hospital, I will, because based on your reaction I’m just feeling like that’s where she is. Or I can take you home. Either way, you’re not driving, not like this. You’ll get in an accident and nobody wants that.” 
He sniffled softly, nodding his head as he lifted it from the wheel, opening the door slowly and climbing out, walking around to the passenger side of the car. “They said… She was there…” He muttered, watching Chan climb over to the drivers side and then quickly getting in and putting on his seatbelt. “They said that she…. She can’t talk right now…” His head shook and his shakily sniffled, his entire body trembling as he practically gasped for air. “I knew there was something wrong… She wasn’t feeling good and… And I was worried but I didn’t do anything. I didn’t stay with her… I should have taken her to the hospital… I didn’t… I failed her…” 
Chan knew that the guilt would be there, but it didn’t make it any less heartbreaking to see his friend, his brother like this. He didn’t even know what to do, because he knew that if the shoe was on the other foot, he’d be feeling the same way. “You didn’t fail her… You believed her because she said that she was okay… That’s not your fault. Plus, you said it yourself, she likes feeling like she has some sort of control over her life… Maybe she thought she’d be able to get better herself…” 
“That doesn’t change the fact that I left… She’s supposed to trust me and… how can she trust me now… when I left her… Like that…” He was stumbling over his words as his tears continued to fall down his cheeks, his hands quickly swiping across his face to wipe them away. “She was… She was in the middle of making her lunch… She didn’t even get to eat…” 
There was nothing that Chan could say to get Changbin out of his own head, so he just listened, completely understanding where he was coming from, but he wished that Changbin would understand that it wasn’t his fault. “She’s sick Changbin… These things happen… You’ve done a lot of research on it, you know these things can happen. But you can’t protect her all the time… You just can’t.” 
Changbin was silent for a moment, his thumb coming up to his mouth as he chewed on his nail. “I want to… I want to protect her… I researched things and… And I knew that things like this could happen and I still left her. I knew the symptoms that were bad… and she had all of them… Why did I leave?” He was breathing heavily, it almost sounded like he was about to throw up himself. “If I was there..-“ 
“It still would have happened because she was sick, Changbin…” Chan said sternly, trying to snap Changbin out of this self deprecating spiral he was in. “You can’t be with her every second of every day, and I’m sure she wouldn’t want you to be like that anyway. This would have happened whether you were home with her or not. Beating yourself over it won’t change things.” 
The hospital towered over the car, shadowing him and Chan when they stepped out, like a giant dark cloud and Changbin hated it. He hated hospitals anyway, and the only reason he was going in was because you were in there. “You don’t have to follow me in…” He mumbled when Chan climbed out of the car as well. “She wouldn’t want to be crowded.” 
“I’ll wait in the waiting room, I’ll wait for you. You can’t stay here all night and someone needs to drive you home.” Chan said and Changbin just nodded, he didn’t have the energy to go against what he said. “Do you need me to go up to the front desk and ask f-“ 
“I’m not an infant.” Changbin snapped before taking a deep breath and running his hands over his face. “Sorry… I just… I’m scared, hyung. I can do it though… thank you.” Chan pursed his lips as he patted Changbins back, holding the door open for him and then following behind. 
It was hard to ask the lady at the front desk about you, mainly because it made it more real that you were truly there. His voice cracked and his vision became blurry as he started to cry again just from simply asking what room you were in. 
“The treatment is going well, sir. It’s-” 
“Is it?” Changbin cut the doctor off as he stood at the end of your bed, the IV’s poking out of your arm looked painful, and the tubes that were in your nose and your mouth to help you breathe surely weren’t reassuring. “Is it really going well, because if it were, she’d be awake right now. She’d be happy to see me… But she’s sleeping… She’s still sleeping… So tell me how this is supposed to show me that the treatment is going well.” 
His fingers were wrapped tightly around the footboard of the bed, and his head slowly turned to look at the doctor who was, rightfully, quite scared of Changbin. His temperament was nothing short of seemingly hostile, and it seemed like anything could make him snap in an instant. “Sir… We truly are trying to get her to rise as soon as possible, and I assure you, she will be okay… She will wake up… But this rest, it’s, in a sense… It’s kind of helpful… Her body has surely been through a lot.” The word helpful in this setting was definitely not something that Changbin wanted to hear, and his teeth gritted together as he narrowed his eyes at the doctor. “Wh-What I meant to say is… She was sick… For a while. Maybe she knew, maybe she didn’t, we’re unsure… But her body just wasn’t able to produce enough insulin and… Well I’m sure that you know what ketoacidosis is-” 
“Yes I know what that is.” Changbin snapped, his breaths becoming more harsh as he glared at the doctor. “I’ve done everything to protect her… To make sure she’s healthy and well… So why did this happen?!” He knew that shouting at the doctor wouldn’t give him the answers that he wanted so badly, but he needed to get it all out, he needed to let go of the anger that he was holding in towards himself, and sadly for the doctor, he was the only one in the room right now. 
“We all want to protect the people that we love, and I tell you, it is crystal clear that you love her… But you can’t always protect them, you can’t always protect her, and you can’t protect her from herself. She’s got a disease, and with this disease comes moments like this… And that’s just something that you either get used to… Or-” 
“I’m not leaving her.” Her hissed, finally turning back to look at you. “You hear that, babe. I’m not leaving you… You’re stuck with me. I’m gonna sit right here beside you until your beautiful eyes open and you look up at me and I can tell you how much I love you…” 
“Well…” The doctor whispered sheepishly, his hands clapping together as he looked nervously as Changbin, slowly backing away in the process. “There are visiting hours and… Everyone kind of has to abide by those hours. You won’t really be able to stay in here… Or sit beside her… As sweet as the sentiment is…” 
Changbin chuckled, although there was nothing funny about what was going on, and the sound was more snarky than anything as he grabbed the chair from the corner of the room and sat it down next to your bed, dropping down into it and crossing his arms over his chest. “I said I’m not leaving… And you can try to drag me out of here, but I’ll come back. I’ll always come back because I’m not leaving her here with you guys all by herself. So you can either cause a bigger problem… Or you can just let me sit here.” 
The doctor relented, shaking his head as he walked out of the room. Changbin wasn’t sure whether he should prepare himself for security to come in and try to get him out, or maybe the doctor was just letting the other doctors and the nurses know about the way that he was. Whatever the reason, no one had come in the room for the past five minutes, and he felt like he was in the clear, so he let himself finally look at you, really look at you. 
“Why didn’t you tell me you were feeling bad?” He murmured, grabbing your hand and holding it tightly, wishing for the feeling of your fingers slipping between his own, but there was no movement, there was nothing. Your hands felt so cold in his and he quickly placed a kiss to the back of it before sliding it underneath the blanket to try to keep you warm. “I think I made you lose your job… But it’s okay… I’ll take care of us, I promise I will… I can even find you a job in the office if you really want to work… I just want you close to me.” Your heart rate started to climb the more he spoke, and that in itself had a solemn smile gracing his saddened features. “You hear me… I know you do. I’m right here, I’m not going anywhere. I love you… And I’d do anything to hear you say it back right now… I just need you to wake up.” His sniffles were loud as his head fell forward against the bed, his entire body shaking and his fingers gripping onto the blankets. He had never felt so helpless when it came to you, but the doctor was right… He couldn’t protect you from yourself… That didn’t mean that he wouldn’t try though. In fact, he’d try harder now… He needed you to wake up though… That’s all he needed. 
Jeongin
Jeongin didn’t exactly live with you, although the guys often joked that he might as well considering he was over your house more than anything else. It’s not even that he didn’t want to live with you, to be completely honest, he just liked the way you sounded in the morning when he rolled out of bed, the way you’d so cutely ask him if he was coming back over when he got off work. Of course he was, there was nowhere else he’d rather fall asleep than beside you, but he loved teasing you, and you’d pout up at him making it almost impossible to resist kissing your perfect lips. 
From a technical standpoint, he had been living with you for three months now… and Jeongin was not only an amazing person to live with, but he was also an amazing boyfriend. Not for the typical reasons though, actually, it was quite the opposite. Your condition wasn’t too bad, it definitely wasn’t the best medical ailment to have, but… When life gives you lemons… You make what you can with those lemons. 
In the duration of your relationship, you had become somewhat of a master at both treating your condition and hiding it from Jeongin. Now, you may be asking… Why hide it from him? And, the reason was quite simple. You loved him, and the last thing you needed him to do was worry about you when he had so much to worry about himself. He was a jokester, he was a smartass, but he had a heart twice the size of the moon it seemed sometimes, and if he knew that there was something wrong with you he’d worry too much. 
It also made it easier to relax, to be able to somewhat make light of the situation, which of course shouldn’t be made light of, but sometimes you just got tired of the seriousness from the doctors and your family, you got tired of being constantly told to watch for your blood pressure, to listen to your heartbeat, to take your medicines. You just wanted to be able to joke around sometimes. 
“Damn sweetcheeks!” Jeongin teased as he laid his head on your chest, your fingers brushing lightly through his hair as you both watched tv. “I really do make your heart go boom boom crazy.” And you couldn’t help but snort loudly at the comment because, while he wasn’t exactly wrong, your heart already beat like crazy, he just made it even crazier. “It’s cause I’m cute, isn’t it?” 
You rolled your eyes at him, teasingly pushing him away. “Oh yeah, you’re totally cute.” You said mockingly, watching his eyes go wide at the very obvious sarcasm. “You’re the cutest, Innie. You already know that though.” You leaned in to press a kiss to his forehead before sitting up and taking a deep breath, winded just from goofing up. 
“Ooh, looks like I take your breath away too. Even after two whole years, I’ve got the same effect on you.” He sat up, kissing your forehead before getting up off the couch. “As much as I’d love to stay here with you for the rest of the morning, I have to go to work.” He pouted, as if you would somehow be able to bribe Chan into letting Jeongin stay home. “I guess I’ll just… walk out the door now… be gone for almost ten hours… that’s how long you won’t see me…” 
He was always so dramatic, sometimes it seemed like Hyunjin had really rubbed off on him, not that you minded though. At the beginning of the relationship he had been so shy, it was like he avoided your touch and your affection, but now he was as clingy as you thought you were in the beginning. “The door will be unlocked when you get off, pooh bear.” You reassured him and he pouted even more now, causing you to, foolishly, jump off the couch, your head spinning and your vision going partially blank as your balance wobbled. 
“Woah… you good there, sweets?” He asked, his usually cheerful voice masked with his worry as he placed his hands on your shoulders to hold you steady. “You coulda just told me to come over to give you the hug. Try not to get up so fast.” His hands slid down to your hips and he pulled you closer, leaning in to kiss you softly. “I’ll let you know when I get off and if you need anything from the store I’ll get it on my way back… I mean… If you want me to come over.” 
“Oh shush…” You pressed your finger against his lips with a smile, still breathing quite heavily as you leaned your head against his chest, your hands falling to your side. “You can come over whenever because it’s your house too… It’s our house.” You kissed his chest and then backed up, falling back onto the couch. “Don’t work too hard… I’ll miss you.” 
His lips drew into a thin line as he looked you over, trying not to think so hard about the way your head fell back against the couch and your eyes closed, your chest rising and falling heavily. If there was something wrong, you’d surely tell him… Of course you would. He was your boyfriend, you could tell him anything, he wanted you to tell him everything. “I’ll miss you too… I’ll be home in a couple hours… Love you.” 
You hummed in response, listening for the door to shut before getting up and sprinting to your room, which in itself was a bad idea, falling to the floor and pulling out the shoebox full of medicine out from under the bed and taking one of the pills, laying your head against the edge of the bed as you tried to relax. You weren’t sure how much longer you could hide this from him, and you could see that he was already picking up on something being wrong, he just wasn’t questioning it verbally. It was just a matter of time now. 
“Y/N’s been acting really weird lately…” Jeongin mused as he and the guys took a small break during practice, leaning against the wall and taking a sip of his drink, his mind reeling with far too many things right now. “I don’t know, maybe I’m just overthinking things… I do that sometimes…” He basically talked to himself now even though the rest of the guys were listening. 
“Depends on what kind of weird it is.” Minho posed, and whether it was done on purpose or simply to try to help Jeongin get to the bottom of the way that he was feeling, it wasn’t helping at all. “Is it like a sneaky weird, like… Like does she have a secret side boyfriend? Is she gonna break up with you?” The questions were both terrifying and gut wrenching at the same time, Jeongins eyes widened at the possibility, but you would never do something like that… Not without talking to him first. 
“N-No… It’s… It’s like a sick… Like she’s sick or something.” He quickly explained what had happened this morning, the way that you acted. He was worried sick, but he felt like if it truly was nothing then you’d think he was silly for being so scared. Then again, it came along with being your boyfriend… He was supposed to worry about you, right? That’s the way it seemed when he watched the other guys with their partners.
Minho hummed, nodding his head as he snorted softly, placing a gentle hand on Jeongins shoulder to try to calm the obviously worried boy. “She’s on her period. That’s what’s going on… And I promise you… She’ll be totally fine. She’ll just bleed for a couple days, she’ll probably cramp up so bring her lots of her favorite snacks and heating pads to help her… But other than that… There’s not really much that you can do. Best of luck.” 
Your period, of course! Why hadn’t he thought of that?! He had been with you for a quite a while now, and he knew that your body wasn’t the kindest to you when it was that time of the month. “Right… Maybe I can get her some… Some ibuprofen or something too… To help with the cramps… Shouldn’t I?” He asked, looking to all of his hyungs for answers to this current situation that none of them knew about, but they had partners that suffered the same monthly fate that you did, so they at least knew enough. 
“That’s good… That’s a good idea. Look at you! So smart.” Jisung ruffled Jeongins hair as he walked by, earning himself a grimace from Jeongin who took the comment as sarcasm, but he felt like he was a good boyfriend… A really good boyfriend for thinking of the medicine. He didn’t like seeing you in pain, and while he was rarely ever around for your times of the month because of work… He remembered the one time he came home when you were having really bad cramps and it broke his heart to see you hurting so badly. 
“I’m the best boyfriend here. I’m gonna go home and take care of my girl.” Jeongin boasted quite proudly, and no one in the room disagreed. They were proud of him, they were happy for him. He had finally found someone to share his life with, he had grown and matured so much in the process too… They couldn’t feel anything but pride for having him as their little brother. 
You laid across the couch, trying your best to relax, but it didn’t seem to be working, not the way it usually would. The last time you had felt this bad was so long ago, it had been your parents who had rushed you to the hospital, your feet not even touching the floor of the car yet as your mom sat in the backseat with you to try to help you breathe through it. The medicine was supposed to keep this from happening, or at least from happening as bad as it was right now. For the longest time it had helped, maybe you had just waited too long before taking it today. 
“I’m home, sweets!” Jeongin announced as he walked through the front door, the sudden entrance startling you and saving you from slipping into unconsciousness yet again. “I know you’ve been feeling bad lately… So I got you some stuff.” He held the bags with a wide smile, and you didn’t know how he found out, but somehow he did. At least he wasn’t mad or upset with you for hiding it for so long. 
“What’s in the bags, Innie?” You quizzed when he set them down on the floor next to the couch and then walked into the kitchen. “It looks like a lot.” It was about four bags, but they all seemed to be stuffed with a bunch of different things. 
“Yah! Don’t go looking through the bags yet! I want to sit with you and watch your face when you see everything I got!” He called out, and you felt so warm, and your heart that was already beating erratically, fluttered even more. He had found out about your condition, and instead of coming straight home and trying to talk to you about it, he had gone and gotten you treats… He was the sweetest, kindest- “Damn, you really have been on that couch all day.” 
Your soft thoughts practically record scratched at his words, and usually you’d be able to hear the teasing tone or the sarcasticness in his voice when he said something like that… But not this time. “What are you talking about? I have gotten up off the couch…” You defended yourself, because you really have been up on your feet, it just wasn’t the best thing for you to do right now so you were trying to keep yourself safe, that’s what your doctor had advised you to do when you felt this way. 
The sink started running and you could hear the trash can lid being opened, slapping against the counter before being closed again. “Well not to do anything productive.” He countered, and you swore it was like a complete 180 with him. How could he just come home and seem so understanding and then get like this in a matter of seconds? “You left everything from breakfast all over the counters… Do you even know how long it’s been since I made you breakfast? That’s slob behavior!” He was clearly annoyed, and every time something was slammed down or thrown into the sink to be washed, your heart would skip a couple more beats and your chest would tighten up even more. “I know you’ve got your period and all… But damn, you couldn’t even clean off the counter or run some water over the plates? That’s just lazy.” 
Period? You didn’t have your period… But now it was making sense. He thought he knew what was going on… He thought it was your period… That’s why he had bought so many things to try to make you feel better. He must have noticed you acting strange this morning and tried his best to figure it out, and obviously he wasn’t going to jump immediately to what your real condition was, there was no reason for him to even think that’s what was wrong. “I don’t have my period…” You retorted breathlessly, two fingers pressing against your neck as your eyes closed to focus on the rather quick, maybe far too quick, beating of your heart. “You don’t… You don’t know what’s wrong…” 
“Oh clearly I do! You don’t have your period, there’s nothing actually keeping you from being even slightly clean. You’re just lazy.” He said as he turned off the sink in the kitchen and walked past you behind the couch. “I should have just stayed at the dorms tonight, at least they know how to clean up after themselves.” 
You didn’t know where this was coming from, why he was being like this, but you were quickly moving on from being upset, to thoroughly pissed, and neither of those were good for your blood pressure right now. “Yeah… You should have… Because you’re not really helping me out here at all. You don’t fucking listen!” 
Jeongin laughed sarcastically as he rolled his eyes. “I don’t help!? I just cleaned the whole fucking kitchen because you didn’t, but I’m not helping you out. Okay. Yeah… Yeah okay, we’ll go with that.” He scoffed loudly, shaking his head as he went to the front door. “You know what, next time you want to lay around on the couch all day, at least have the common decency to clean up a bit so I don’t have to do it when I get home from work.” 
God, he was absolutely infuriating. This was a side of him that you had never seen before, and while he didn’t know what was wrong, it didn’t give him any right to talk to you like that. “Just get out… Get the fuck out!” You gasped out the demand, going light headed from the stress of it all. 
“Gladly!” He shouted, throwing up his arms before yanking open the door and walking out. He always had to have the last word, and that in itself was the final straw, the breaking point for you. It was an awful idea, but your anger momentarily fueled you, pushing yourself up off the couch and grabbing one of the bags off the floor, beaming it at the door that he had just walked out of. 
Sure, he had walked out, but he wasn’t actually planning on leaving. After a couple minutes he planned on going back in and shamefully apologizing for what he said. He was leaning against the front door when he heard the loud bang against it and a bunch of items falling to the floor, and he knew without a doubt that it had been one of the bags, it was the closest thing to you right now. What he didn’t know though, was the sound that followed after. A loud thud and glass shattering, and he knew for a fact that it came from inside the apartment, and he couldn’t seem to get inside fast enough. 
From the sound of it, it just seemed like you had tripped over the coffee table and maybe knocked over one of the glasses that were sitting on it. Upon further inspection and actually seeing it, he could tell that it was way worse. The coffee table, which was glass as well, was now shattered completely underneath you, which in itself was scary considering how dangerous it was, but the scariest part was the fact that you weren’t moving, you weren’t making any sounds at all. 
“Y/N!” He rushed over to your side, the sound of glass crunching beneath his feet as he got closer was stomach turning, knowing that a majority of it was beneath you. “Hey… Hey come on… Get up now… This isn’t funny…” He rushed out the words as he kneeled down beside you, hoping that you’d open your eyes and laugh at how worried he is right now and it would be the perfect get back for what he had just done… Although there was no way that you would have been able to plan for this to happen… No… Something was actually wrong. “Fuck… Come on, sweets… Y-You know I love you… S-So much… You’re scaring me real bad right now…” He rambled, his hands shaking as he tried to move you off the pile of glass, feeling the slight warmth against your back when he got his hands under you. 
“Sh-Shoe… Box…” Your voice was weak as you wheezed out the word that only had him more dumbfounded. The hell did a shoebox have to do with it? Did you trip over one of his shoe boxes? “Under… Th-The bed…” You continued, your eyes opening momentarily, only for them to roll to the back of your head, your neck going limp once more as your breaths became even faster as more labored. The bedroom was so far away, and that meant that he’d have to leave you alone to get it… And even if it was just for a moment, he didn’t want to leave you like this.
“Shit… What… What do I do?” He whimpered, looking between your body that lay in his arms and the bedroom door that was cracked open. “I’ll… I’ll be right back… I’ll get it… I will…” He whispered, and he carefully laid you back down on the floor, feeling bad enough as it is, but leaving you there only made him feel worse. He didn’t even know that there was a shoebox under the bed, he had never seen it, and part of him thought that you were just hallucinating… But he still ran to the room, basically diving onto the floor and reaching underneath. Lo and behold, there was a box, one that he had never seen before, and when he opened it up, he saw a vast assortment of medications, a blood pressure cuff, a stethoscope, and the phone number for your doctor. “What… What the fuck?” 
It wasn’t the right time for questioning things, not yet, and he ran back out into the living room with the box, lowering himself to the floor beside you. Your eyes were beginning to flutter once again beneath your lids, and then they slowly opened, looking up at him in a sort of daze. “Shoe… Box… Under the-” 
“Under the bed… I got it…” He finished your sentence, pulling out the multiple bottles of medication and holding them up. “Wh-What do you need? Which… Which one?” Your hand was shaking and you could barely lift your arm up to point at the bottle, but he moved them closer and your pointer finger slid across one of them, and he hoped to god that you were paying attention, that you knew what you had picked because he didn’t know a damn thing about any of them. 
His own hands were shaking as he popped off the lid of the bottle and poured one of the pills into the palm of his hand, grabbing one of the bottles of soda from out of the bag that was still on the floor and then gently lifted your head up. Your lips parted just enough for him to slip the pill into your mouth, and he ever so carefully brought the bottle of soda to your lips, tilting it so you’d get just enough to swallow the medicine without any trouble. 
How long would it take to work though? Had he given you the right one? His nerves were absolutely shot right now, his mind was in a frenzy, and it felt like it took forever for you to finally seem stable enough to actually talk. “The cuff… Pen… Paper… Number…” You muttered, and he didn’t know what the hell you were talking about, but you seemed to know, and you seemed to have done it enough to be able to do these things on your own even when you were still partially out of it. 
“How long…?” He whispered, and you quickly shushed him, your eyes shut as the hum of the blood pressure machine filled the room that was otherwise silent apart from your still shallow breaths. Once it had finished, you wrote the numbers on a tiny slip of paper and then slipped them back into the box. 
“I’m okay… Gonna have to sweep this up…” You said as you looked around yourself, shaking your head as you slowly got to your feet, but you stumbled once again once you were on them, causing Jeongins panic to only worsen as he wrapped his arms around your waist, his eyes glossy as he stared at you and held you steady. 
“No… We’re talking… We… We need to talk…” He stammered, moving you to the couch and sitting you down, standing in front of you so he could really see you, so you could see him. “Y-You hid this from me… I… I still don’t know what’s going on… I’m scared… I’m worried… I’m fucking traumatized!” Your head once again rolled back against the back cushion and he rushed to grab your hand, his own heart racing. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?” 
“This… This is why I hid it…” You mumbled, your eyes still shut as you spoke. “It’s too much for you… It’s too much for anyone… I didn’t want to put you through this…” 
“What are you talking about?!” He screeched, and while he thought it had been devastating to know that there was something like this going on without his knowledge, he was even more devastated to know that you had purposely kept it from him because you thought he couldn’t handle it. “I’m your boyfriend! I want to know these things! I want to be able to help you! If it’s about you… If it’s for you… Nothing is too much.” 
“Jeongin… I didn’t do it to hurt you… Or to upset you… I did it because I care… I care about you. I didn’t want you… Worrying about me… You wouldn’t be able to focus on work… You’d constantly be wondering if I’m… If I’m having another episode… I just… I didn’t want this to ruin things for you…” You were breathing heavily again, your fingers wrapping around your wrist as you silently mouthed numbers. Did you have to do this every day? He had never seen you do this, and there were many times he had days off and things weren’t this bad. “We should just… Break up… So you don’t-”
 “What?! Absolutely fucking not!” He screamed, kneeling on the floor in front of you and grabbing your hands, waiting for you to look at him before speaking. “You think breaking up will help? You think just ending this will make me forget about everything? You think it’ll immediately change the way I feel about you? I fucking love you, Y/N! And you’re goddamn right I’m worried about you… I’m gonna worry about you every single day for the rest of my life whether you were sick or not because I care about you.” Your eyes shut once more, but now shiny tears danced along your cheeks before hanging onto your chin, refusing to fall. “I may be young… And I’m dumb as shit sometimes… But I’m not a fucking idiot, I’m not gonna let you go, I’m not… I love you too damn much… I’m gonna take care of you… I will… You’re gonna be stuck with me the rest of your life, and I hope that I’m lucky enough to be stuck with you for the rest of mine.”
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tvhsleb3ww · 5 months
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A LIFETIME BLESSING — ISSEI MATSUKAWA
tw : mentions of the deceased, funeral, pda, allergic reaction
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matsukawa issei never thought he'd find the person he wants to spend the rest of his life with. he always thought he was destined to be alone and he really doesn't like to socialise with women that much.
some might say he's a nonchalant robot who doesn't care about others unless they are important to him, some might say he's a wild fuckboy who hooks up with a lot of women. but in reality— both aren't true. (or at least he thinks so)
to summarize, he doesn't think he's a loverboy at heart and no woman would make him lovestruck.
yet here he was.
it was the wee hours of the morning, around 6am or so. he can be a lot of things but an early bird is not him. bonus points, he's a heavy sleeper too. so, it'd take him a long time to wake up.
he has a busy day arriving. a newly delivered deceased had arrived at the funeral home yesterday evening and today is the day of the funeral. his boss wouldn't want him to slack off and actually arrange the funeral properly.
a ringing sound broke the tranquility of your shared bedroom. it must be your alarm. he groans lightly as his eyes started to flutter open, it's always your alarm that wakes him up with a sour mood.
he sighed and sat up on the bed, careful not to wake you up. he had one hand behind your head so you could stay rested on his chest while he deals with your phone.
before he could press the button— you had fluttered your eyes open. you brought your hands to your eyes to rub the sleepiness away. "mmh— issei?" you mumbled followed by a yawn.
he huffs as the alarm stopped ringing before joining to lie down beside you. he leaned down a little to press a kiss on your forehead. his fingers gently stroke your cheek. "m' sorry baby, didn't mean to wake you up" he murmured against your skin.
but something wasn't right. when he attached his lips onto your skin, he felt like his lips were burning. it couldn't be that he had an allergic reaction, right? that doesn't make sense. he really shouldn't have slept during biology class back in high school.
his fingers that were stroking your cheek also felt hot. then, he moved his hands to feel the rest of your skin. your whole body was burning!
he pulled away slightly to take a good look at you.
"baby, are you having a fever?" he asks gently, his eyebrows furrowed together. a small cough escapes pass your lips. that was enough proof to let him know that you are in fact— sick.
in a flash, he gently gets out of bed— making you confused. "issei?" you called out, where is he going? he walks to your side of the bed and pressed a kiss on the crown of your head.
"i'm gonna take some pills and make you breakfast, okay? just lie down and rest your pretty head" he murmurs, leaning down to press a kiss on your forehead.
despite his usual affection, you can't help but to let the blood rush in your cheeks. not just because of the fever.
"thank you, 'sei" you mumbled as he smiles against your skin.
the next thing he knew— he had to call his boss to let him know about his absence today. yeah, he didn't like hearing the old man's nagging first thing in the morning but on the plus side, he gets to take care of you.
and it was so worth it when he got sick the day after. now, it's your turn to take care of him!
(sorry for the disappearance, ive been busy)
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bluejaysandblackbats · 8 months
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Catch and Release
Fandom: DC Comics, Batfam
Summary: AU where Jason doesn't die in the explosion and he and Tim end up attending the same high school months later.
Chapters: 3/?
Characters: Jason Todd, Bruce Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth, Tim Drake, Dick Grayson, Barbara Gordon, Sebastian Ives, Jack Drake, Janet Drake
Relationships: TBA
Additional Tag: Jason Todd Lives, Jason Todd-centric, POV Jason Todd, POV First Person, Tim Drake Has Issues, Tim Drake Has Issues, Tim Drake is Not Robin, Jason Todd is Not Robin (Anymore), Bruce Wayne Needs a Hug, Alfred Pennyworth is the Best, Alfred Pennyworth Knows, Stalker Tim Drake, Jason Todd Has Chronic Pain, Jason Todd Has PTSD, Angst with a Happy Ending, Unlikely Friends, Injury Recovery, Emotional Baggage, Rage, Bruce Wayne is Bad at Communicating
Chapter Three: Timeout
The on-campus suspension wasn't that bad. It beat riding in the car with Dick. I finally managed to stop crying before we got to the school, so I had enough time to hold the icepack in my lunch to my eyes to look normal again. Mr. Ames sent me straight to the counselor's office anyway. The counselor was new, or I didn't recognize him. I sat down and looked around until he tapped on the desk with his pen. "Hey, Jason, I'm Mr. Finney... Can we talk about yesterday?" he asked. "Short-term memory's shot, but I'll give it a try on one condition," I replied. Mr. Finney nodded. "Can you open that window? I'm feeling shut in." I wasn't joking. I hid it well, but I'd developed claustrophobia from the accident. "Of course," Mr. Finney replied as he opened the window for me. "Would you like the door cracked?" I shook my head. "You were saying?" I asked. "Can we talk about the fight yesterday?" Mr. Finney repeated. I nodded. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. "I should've had better control over my feelings," I mumbled. "Jason, what were you feeling at the time?" Mr. Finney asked. The last thing I wanted to talk about was how I felt. "I was just sick of feeling weak," I answered. It wasn't a lie. I didn't have any reason to lie. That was the last substantial thing I contributed to the conversation. He wasn't bad at his job, not by far. I think he knew I'd be shut off. I'd give him nothing but breadcrumbs. "How long have you been claustrophobic?" Mr. Finney asked.
"I started having symptoms in April," I answered, "It's January now. Nine months."
"Because of the accident?" Mr. Finney questioned. I nodded. I shut my eyes as I recalled what it felt like to be trapped between my mother's body and the debris from the explosion. "Jason?" "I'm done talking. I don't-. I'm sorry," I stammered. Once I had the thought in my head, it took a while to push it back down. I squeezed my hands together to stop them from shaking. "Can I go now?" "Sure, Jason... You can go," Mr. Finney replied, and I walked to the designated campus suspension room. I'd never been back there before. I worked on homework while I was there until the lunch bell rang. Alfred made me two chicken wraps for lunch and a cup of pudding. After lunch, Bruce came to talk to Mr. Ames in person. They had a long conversation that resulted in Bruce taking me home early. "What's wrong?" I asked. Bruce shook his head. "Nothing. I want to know what happened between you and Dick this morning," Bruce whispered. I looked out the window. "You can't pick me up early from school to make me apologize," I replied. "What happened?" Bruce asked once more. I didn't want to talk about it. Maybe I should've. It might've helped. "Fine, but that's not why I picked you up early. I almost forgot we had to reschedule your Wednesday for today." "So, nothing on Wednesday?" I asked.
"Ophthalmologist on Wednesday morning and the optometrist right after, but you'll be there for the second half of school," Bruce replied.
"Are my glasses ready?" I asked. "They should be," Bruce answered. Even after my orbital bone fracture healed, I couldn't see well out of my right eye. "But they also want to see if Monday affected your sight." I grew silent. I knew Bruce wanted me to talk about what happened, but I didn't feel like talking about that. "Is Dick gone?" I asked. "No, he's gonna be here until the end of the week," Bruce replied, "Business..." I rolled my eyes. Business. "Don't be like that," Bruce chastised me.
"Be like what? I'm just peachy," I muttered. I knew Bruce was short with me, and I wanted to push him. I just needed him to snap back. "I have a role to play, Jason," Bruce explained. "You have a lot of roles. Hero, philanthropist, businessman, bachelor... Oh, and an involved father. Guess we both forgot that one, huh, Bruce?" I chuckled. Bruce pulled over on the side of the road and pointed his finger in my face before catching himself. "Hope you enjoyed that. That was your last cheap shot, Jason. I'm serious. You're on thin ice," Bruce warned. I grinned. "I've got tons more, though," I joked. "Enough!" Bruce yelled. I grew silent. "Jason, you've been more insufferable now than you've been in months. I'm sick of it. You have until we get to the doctor's to get it together. I get it. I do," Bruce berated me. He'd finally gotten tired of me pushing him. I didn't expect that to be the last straw, though. I shut my mouth and let him drive me to my appointment. I didn't know what to say to him anyway. I got what I wanted, and it was a hollow victory. I didn't have to see my Wednesday doctor, but Bruce made me go to a pulmonologist twice a month after my lung collapsed again during a bout of pneumonia in October. It was painful. The nurse checked me in and asked me a few questions before sending the doctor in. I sat on the hospital bed, staring at her as she checked my breathing for herself. "You got in a fight. Did you experience any shortness of breath?" she asked. The pulmonologist was no-nonsense, and she quickly got to the point. "Nuh-uh," I replied as she let me pull my shirt down. "What about school? Do you have P.E.?" she asked. I shook my head. "Any concerns or changes?" "Nope," I replied. She nodded. "Okay, what's wrong? Not a single joke?" she questioned. "I've told one too many today," I replied, "And today kind of sucked..." She nodded and sent me out to Bruce. Bruce embraced me as soon as I walked out the door. I would've pushed him away any other day, but I needed it then. I hugged back, and he pulled away. "I love you. I don't say it enough," Bruce whispered.
I walked ahead of him so he couldn't see me crying. He wouldn't start the car when we got to the parking lot. "I'm sorry," I mumbled. "You wanna grab a bite to eat before we go home?" Bruce asked. I nodded. I almost felt like myself again, but it didn't last. There was an explosion down the street, and Bruce left me to sort things out. He parked me outside the restaurant, and I ordered food and sat in the car. All the anger and bitterness I had toward him came flooding back. I ate my food in the car and waited until Alfred came to pick me up. "Master Jason-." "It's fine, Alfred... Can we go home now?" I asked. I don't know. Maybe there was no use in trying.
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anqelfries · 6 days
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OKAY ITS DUE TIME FOR ME TO SEND U A YAP ASK ‼️‼️😋 LINA SUGARPLUM MUFFIN LOLLIPOP HONEYPIE (by jawny???) HOW ARE YOU DARLING HOW WAS YOUR DAY GIVE ME THE RUNDOWN ‼️
so like im gonna yap about my week CAUSE IT FELT LONG AS HELL I PHYSICALLY TWEAKED OUT JUST REFLECTING BACK ON ALL OF IT‼️‼️
so as u know i was ill last week (was that even last week I CANT REMEMBER BUT IT WAS RECENTLY) and i was coughing up a storm at school on monday and tuesday IT WAS HELL ITSELF I SWEAR.
SO I HAD LIKE,, 7 TESTS? THIS WEEK? I THINK? a ton!! like wdym im getting a test thats not writing in journalism class? WHY ARE WE HAVING A HISTORY TEST IN THIS CLASS THATS SO WEIRD TO ME??? anyway... that and a spanish test and two math tests and two tests in my ap class and an english comprehension test i was not thriving this week
AND BY THE WAY, THE TESTS IN MY AP CLASS WERE LITERALLY RETAKES BECAUSE I WAS GONE REVIEW DAY CAUSE I WAS SICK AND HAD TO TAKE THE TESTS WITHOUT STUDYING AT ALL. THE TEACHER WAS LATE TO CLASS THAT DAY SO IT TOOK ME LIKE THREE ADVISORY PERIODS TO FINISH THE STUPID TESTS 💔💔
erm anyways all of that happened AND IM NOW THRIVING I FINISHED ALL MAJOR WORK AND MY GRADES ARE LOOKING UP SO YIPPEE!!! 
yesterday i went to the school football game with my friends!! our team kinda demolished the visiting team dude 😭😭 IT WAS LIKE?? 68-0???? LIKE DAMN OKAY LET THEM GET UP BROTHERS 😭
ALSO AT THE GAME THERE WAS A KISS CAM AND MY FRIENDS ENDED UP ON IT WE WERE ALL SCREAMING SOOOO MUCH 😨 IT WAS WILD LINA!!! BUT THE GAME WAS A TON OF FUN AND WE ALL HAD FUN SCREAMING AT THE TOP OF OUR LUNGS AND DOING RANDOM STUFF IN THE STANDS!!
SO THERES MY YAP! TELL ME ABOUT YOUR DAY AND WHATS BEEN GOING ON W U POOKIE 😋 HRU HOWS LIFE WHAT ARE WE DOING TOMORROW
HONEYPIE BY JAWNY !!!!! erm big yap under cut methinks..
HELLO HELLO MY DEAR SWEET LITTLE BIRTHDAY CAKE CARDBOARD BOX CARAMELIZED SUGAR STICK !!! iM DOING LIKE.. OKAY I THINK. SUPER TIRED OMW HOME FROM SCHOOL i slept 1.5hrs last night..
my freaky english teacher likes me. a h a h a anyways ive been getting into art moar >:3 again so i spent like half the time drawing and stuff help .. not when i needed to concentrate tho !!! i drew a fish person ish i will show u later. apparently everyone flunked the maths test so like i may end up on the news tho... my last three assessments were all straight A's but the highest grade in the entire class in this one is a B and idk man i might Die. also i think i did well in english bc.. the teacher seems satisfied w me.. SCHOOL IS CLOSED TMR SO I WILL LOCK IN AND WRITE MY SILLY SMAU METHINKS
my friend who i sat beside today let me draw my fish on her bandaid :33 she calls me fish too and i call her cat it's a long story basically but in eighth grade like.. back in 2022 we exchanged discords and my nickname was fishie and hers was neko so like .. fish and cat. oh and once a physics teacher referred to me as fish too help
im super eepy rn help.. started raining in the morning n i got hopeful that school would be cancelled but NO bc the universe HATES me
im going to change & pass out now i think highkey.
OK NOW !!! UR THINGS LETS SEE omg yes this week was so fkn long ewwww
IM SO SORRY AB UR STUPID TESTS <//)3 I HAD THREE ON SUNDAY ALONE LAST WEEK IT WAS SO BAD I FAKED BEING SICK ON TUESDAY (?) KIND OF.. LIKE I FELT BAD BUT NOT BAD ENOUGH TO NOT GO TO SCHOOL
IM GLAD UR GRADES ARE LOOKING UP !!! IF U LISTEN CLOSELY IM ACTUALLY CHEERING SO LOUD FOR U RN 😹
football game is insane (never seen one) 68 - ZERO ??? IS THE HOME TEAM THAT GOOD OR IS THE OTHER ONE JUST BAD PLS... ALSO LIKE WHAT !!!! kiss cam sounds like sm fun !!!!
okay pause to say that this ask is literally makign me so happy rn idk bro but im kicking feet i feel all warm n fluttery inside
OK BACK ON TOPIC im so glad u had fun <333 that experience seems so amazing like omg !!! ik youll remember it for a WHILE i long to experience that kind of fun again omg
OKAY ANYWAYS MY DAY RIGHT !!! i cancelled on my maths teacher + postponed his class to tmr bc i want to sleep and grind genshin and watch a movie or 2 !!! im thinking everything everywhere all at once ive wanted to watch it forever but never really had the independence to do so like i do now !!!! my big toe hurts for some reason idk :/// AND IVE BEEN HAVING SUCH BAD NAGI BRAINROT RECENTLY OMHHHH LIKE MY MAN.. MY MAN..... SAVE ME NAGI SEISHIRO SAVE ME..........
aaaaa where was i !!! oh yesyes so i was thinking moot tags right ... bc i need smth cute for u.... bc ur so cute....
UM YES THATS ALL FOR TODAY I HOPE UR SLEEPING WELL & DM ME WHEN U SEE THIS !!! not for any specific reason just say hi bc imy (we literally talked a few hrs ago) ily sav !!!! PS CONGRATS ON MAKING THE MAGAZINE TEAM IM SO PROUD OF U !!!!
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lesbiandarvey · 7 months
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were on day 4 of being bored home sick so im gonna start darveyposting. also theres a blizzard warning but it was 65 degrees and sunny yesterday?? i mean its like, a little bit cloudy today but ?? anyway my donnaharvey playlist right now is. okay theyre all taylor swift songs
style - “you got that james dean daydream look in your eye and i got that red lip classic thing you like” i mean self explanatory. altho i keep waiting for her to wear red lipstick to make a gifset or something but they always put her in like peach or pink shades lmao. they have to go to a party or something
i cant tell you how much i want a donnaharvey clubbing scene. let them get slutty!!!
ivy cus i think harvey’s pain fits in donnas freezing hand. plus im obsessed with the idea of harvey cheating on mike with donna it would be super fucked up. shes there drinking his husbands wine
high infidelity again obsessed with harvey cheated on mike with donna. i really do think if mike and harvey ever got together they would get divorced or it wouldn’t work out. i think mikes picket fence is sharp as knives for harvey and donna brings him back to life
oh in the time ive been typing this it started raining btw
begin again thee donnaharvey song. after everything with mike breaking and burning and ending, he sees donna in the metaphorical cafe. and its always been her… . someday im gonna make a begin again amv where it’s about the people harvey loves mike scottie etc ending and going to donna .. and i was thinking how cool it would be to go like backwards in time like the first chorus “on a wednesday in a cafe” its their first official date in s9 ive seen the gifs and then the last chorus of “on a wednesday in a cafe” like they meet in the bar
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b0nesforshow · 8 days
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ive been sick the past three days so that means i can easily fast in peace 😍
all i consumed yesterday was a small bowl of soup and today my bf is bringing home half a rotisserie chicken for me..
im just praying that the sickness burns extra calories
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kurozu501 · 1 year
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im really sick of people not taking covid seriously
so my dad, who has been masking less and less and ive been trying not to be a bitch about it because he has a fragile ego these days suddenly texts me yesterday that my uncle has covid.
me: the same uncle who you picked up from the airport last thursday?
him: yeah
me: and then you went to a sports game with him the very next day?
him: yeah
me: ok, so have you taken a covid test?
him: no, i feel fine, i don't think i caught it from him.
me:
no matter how much i tried to push him last night he wouldn't take the test, eventually making an excuse about not being able to read the instructions. maybe thats even true, because the best part of all this is that dad just had eye surgery and i have to drive him everywhere. we only found out about this after id already spent a day driving him around in a closed up car btw. and he had a followup doctors appointment that i had to take him to today.
so finally after driving him to and back from his appointment today while wearing a mask in the car and keeping the windows down i get him to take a covid test and its negative. which, thank goodness, but he scoffs about it the entire time like im the crazy one for being worried about this. just what the fuck.
and its made me realize like. this is gonna happen again. with how careless dad is acting these days sooner or later he's gonna catch it and bring it home to me. Even if i continue to be careful and isolated to avoid the virus it doesn't matter if the person i live with throws caution to the winds. so that's. something ive gotta figure out how to deal with.
(my own covid test was negative too, thankfully)
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edgarrallannhoe · 1 month
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7-08-024 man, i fucked up.
today,tomorrow,to…
Ive been vomiting for the past 24+ hours now. i like to say “hahah i’m vomiting SO MUCH but idk why..” i know why. Rome makes me sick, rome makes me want to relapse, rome allows me to relapse. I know it’s no rome’s fault here, i wish it was. I wish all of this was anyone else fault but mine, but here we are, with all the faults in the world i guess.
i have to say tho, among all of the european capitals, rome is the least chic one by a mile.
Yesterday a bought me some Ketamine. I have a complicated relationship with K since the first time i tried it almost twelve-thirteen years ago and not knowing how to use it i just decided to open the bag and snort the whole thing in one line. Bad idea, i spent the night hugging the service toilet at my highschool with a friend making fun of me during the whole thing. Then after that day, i snubbed it at practically every occasion i had, i just wasn’t interested in that devilish thing again, and now, since a few years i’m again at it. I don’t want to talk about this tho, kinda boring, kinda useless.
8-08-024 somebody save me from myself
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the purge
i tried to force myself to post, but i started writing then said “fuck it, why should anybody care?” then said “BuT IM DoInG tHIs FoR MySeLf sO whY dOeS it maTTeR if people enjoy it?” and then again “i’m lying as usual, few are the things i do where i’m not concerned about how i will be perceived, social media isn’t one of them.” so i’m here now, less whiny than the other day, but more sick.
I keep vomiting, crying, then trying to drink lil sips of water then vomiting again the same water i just drank. Atp this night i felt like a dry prune, without water, without anything substantial in me, wrinkled and all, i was literally crying hugging my garbage bin: i want to note that the garbage bin is literally kinda a wicker basket, so lot of holes and whatnot. I said to my dad, that because of my “puking problem” maybe we should pick a new one that doesn’t make everything messier every time this happens, and he bought another bin…. a DRILLED metallic one, so now i have a little drilled bin inside a wicker basket, a nightmare every time, now i have to also clean them after i’m finished!
i don’t think i have an ED, or at least not in the way it is usually explained. Ive always been skinny and kinda minature, and always ate whatever, but i have to admit that while once i believed ( and sometimes said myself ) the whole “i eat whatever and whenever and i stay sKiNNnYyYyYy” , i know understand this whole thing better. While i have a fast metabolism and a skinny/petite corporature, and it’s true that sometimes i eat McDonald’s four days in a row, i don’t put weight on cause i eat nothing during the whole day tho. like, i wake up and drink latte macchiato ( idk outside Italy what Latte Macchiato is, here is just like 1/4 coffee and 3/4 milk with maybe a lil sugar ), then mid morning i drink Latte macchiato, then i skip lunch, then in the afternoon you guess it! Latte macchiato! ( if it’s summer sometimes it gets changed with a cold Cola in the glass bottle, love it ), and THEN i eat McDonald’s. But if you consider the fact that i’m pretty active as a person , always moving even if i’m home in bed, and that i only drink coffee and milk the whole day, it’s not weird not gaining weight if you have a crispy mcBacon for dinner 4 nights straight.
So yeah, i think that whole “eat a lot don’t put on weight” it’s a little bit of a fairytale, but i’m sure that there is always a girl swearing that for them is exactly like that. Good for you Veronica.
Sometimes is also happens, that because i don’t really eat during the day, i end up having less hunger than if i ate ( i always ate slay✨), and then the hunger makes me nauseous, so then i vomit but i vomit absolutely nothing but slimish green bile, and then i am even more “hungry”- the problem is that i’m not, even when i am atp, i’m not hungry, i feel nauseous and i know that it’s because i need to eat, but i would rather not- it becomes a cycle, and every time is exhausting, this night i felt like i just wanted to die. I just wanted to be put off of this misery. Now it’s kinda better, kinda, rn here is 12AM, i woke up at three AM to, you guess it, vomit and it went on until almost two hours ago, i feel like shit.
I bought a watermelon at the store/supermarket, there is a real market near the store with better watermelons but i don’t want to enter that lively place, vade retro lol, so i’m okay with a watery and less red watermelon. i’m now eating in very small bites a small pizza no topping and all, but i’m far from feeling fine.
ok ill stop writing for now, IM DYIIIIING- i wish i was - aaaaaaaaaghhh somebody save me fucking please
xx emma
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twicesserafim · 1 year
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Try Again.
Dammit. Pt. 3
Third Person Pov:
"im really tired today, i played badminton for 4 hours yesterday and my legs hurt like crazy, it hurts when i'm sitting too, i can't run or climb, i'm sorry eun." "it's okay, what about tomorrow?" "im not sure i can"
"oh.. well.. i wish i could help you, i miss you a lot. I hope you feel better soon, it's okay that you can't sneak over, don't feel bad, okay?" "yeah, i'm sorry though" "don't apologize, it's not your fault" "i think i'm sick too"
"yeah.. your voice sounds a little weird. Are you okay?" "my head hurts, i'm sweaty, nauseous and im coughing a lot, my nose is running too" "and you think your sick? honey, you are sick." "i feel really hot" "you are"
The two of you chuckled a bit before Eunchae continued. "i'm joking, but seriously though, you're burning up? are you okay?" "i don't really know" "did you take medicine yet?" "yeah" "i have to get to practice, i'm sorry. Feel better soon, i miss you."
"i miss you too, stay safe, eun." "you too, y/n/n."
...
Eunchae Pov:
"unnies?" They all turned their heads towards me and hummed, "what's up?" "hm?" "why did you stop me from hanging out with y/n?" "it's like a punishment for you getting home late and she's obviously not protecting you and getting you home safe"
"do you want her to run around at midnight to drop me off at the dorm?" "well.. no" "unnie, she's sick. after practice can i please go get some stuff and go see her?" "eunchae-" "please. she's really sick. She's burning up and everything."
"fine. But home before 8, we're picking you up." "but unnie-" "no buts, we're picking you up at 8" chaewon said as i sighed but agreed. I just hope we get out of practice before 7:30.
...
Third Person Pov:
Thank god they got out at 6, eunchae got a few things like snacks, drinks, a cooling gel thing to put of your forehead to help with your fever. She also got flowers but hid those in her bag.
"thanks unnies, see you later, love you!"
...
"eun?" "hey, love." "how did you-" "i asked them to let me come over because you're sick, but i have to go at 8" you sat up slightly as she pushed you back down, "it's 6:30. Don't do anything, i'm here now"
...
Eunchae laid down, wrapping her arms around you. "you'll get sick, your unnies are gonna kill me" "i don't care" "eun.." "stop stressing, i just want you to feel better. I miss you more than anything."
"fine.. but if you get sick, i'm dead. i hope you know that" "i know"
...
"eunchae, we're on our way to pick you up" eunchae sighed. "okay." she looked at your sleeping figure, your skin still so hot, you let out a few gut wrenching coughs. She rubbed your back, her eyes filled with worry.
You quickly fell asleep after coughing, still so tired from just being sick. She didn't want to wake you, because she knew if she told you she's leaving soon, you would force yourself awake to be with her.
So eunchae just stayed quiet, rubbing her thumb against your skin. Until the phone again. "we're here, eunchae" "mhm.." she hummed, your guardians were away on a buisness trip so you were alone.
It was hard for her to leave, she kissed the top of your head. "i'm sorry, darling. But i gotta go. Feel better soon, okay?" "mm.. i'll miss you eun.." "i'll miss you too" "i'll get better so i can see you again" she smiled and nodded.
"that's my girl" the two of you chuckled as she kissed your hand and left your room, putting her shoes on and looking back at the door, sighing.
...
- While eunchae was at your place -
"doesn't eunchae seem happier when she's with y/n?" "yeah, i've noticed that too" "maybe we should think about this." "yeah.. ive been thinking.."
...
"Eunchae?" Kazuha muttered as eunchae got into the car. "hm" "how's she?" "bad" "are her parents home?" "no" "where are they?" "business trip" they all looked at each other, with her short replies.
They knew she was not only worried but also upset that she had to leave. Yunjin and Kazuha nodded, turning to sakura and chaewon in the front. Sakura also nodded, chaewon sighed and nodded.
"eunchae? do you wanna spend the night?" She turned around confused, "huh?" "we're letting you try again, do you wanna stay the night?" Eunchae nodded as a smile made its way on her face. "really?"
"yeah, hurry before we change our minds." "you guys are actually the best, i love you!" "we love you too, kid."
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