#jamil in his silly era

[crystallizsch]

(inspired by the midnight cooking chapter in the twst anthology manga and also jamil's dorm uniform and master chef voice lines)

(this is also a lil extended sequel to this post i made :3)

[twistedmionn]

i havent played twisted wonderland describe all the main characters but badly

Ace: the perfect embodiment of your local chaotic 16-year-old

Deuce: mommy's silly little problem boy who desperately tries to multiply his singular braincell

Riddle: rule-obsessed tomato with anger issues who has never seen a bar of chocolate irl

Trey: teeth-brushing accidental parental figure who probably spikes half of his pastries with marijuana

Cater: the type of guy to sing Two Trucks during a mental breakdown

Leona: it's not me acting like an ass, it's my depression

Ruggie: so adorable that you wouldn't be mad at him even if he successfully robbed a whole ass bank

Jack: i-it's not like I like you, b-baka

Azul: ultimate bottom octobussy (according to approximately every Azul stan I've ever encountered)

Jade: default manipulative evil butler character

Floyd: fan-favorite psychopath

Kalim: what's wrong with manslaughter, why aren't men allowed to laugh? :'(

Jamil: in desperate need of "I'm with stupid" shirts

Vil: "Bad Romance"-era Lady Gaga fan who can & will give you a 5-hour lecture about why gender roles are a spawn from hell (he's right)

Epel: idolizes Gigachad & also radiates big transmasc energy

Rook: hon hon la baguette (French Duolingo owl)

Idia: Levi from Obey Me! except sassier, even more depressed, and with flaming hair

Ortho: that one young child who just casually hangs out with the adults & no one questions a thing (also likes genocide)

Malleus: stealing gargoyles from ancient buildings = a declaration of my unrequited love for you

Lilia: punk grandpa who looks like a teenaged Discord e-girl

Silver: classic love interest from one of those otome games where the MC is a super feminine brunette damsel in distress with bangs, an actual face, and literally no personality

Sebek: sasaeng fanboy

Grim: token glutton mascot character with a squeaky voice

Crowley: Diavolo from Obey Me! except he's an irresponsible middle-aged wannabe Michael Jackson in an aloha shirt

Crewel: TILF (teacher I'd like to fuck)

Trein: don't talk to me or my cat or my cat portraits or my cat mug ever again

Vargas: JoJo character

Sam: dealer who has some sort of obsession with the devil

MC: how tf did all of this happen

...and now, I'm asking you to guess my favorite characters based on these descriptions.

[gloria123idk]

Female TWST

I am a huge women lover. Like its obvious at this point I love women. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. IM. ON. MY. KNEES.

Thats why I shall type main Twisted Wonderland cast as female, because y e s. Btw they personality wont change much, I am just changing the looks

Riddle

Im already huge simp for Disney Queen of Hearts so yeah... Its gonna be worse. I think F!Riddle would be either a short haired or VERY LONG HAIRED. No inbetween, probably long haired so her mom would do this weird smartass haircuts (Like the bun she has herself.). Also girlie is still short, Im so sorry girl you aint getting high shelves soon (I love short girls)

Trey

OMG. GIRL IN GLASSES. YES. Also, Trey can cook and is basically, like a parent to anyone, so his female version would be taken by STRAIGHT MAN. NOOOOOOOO. That not good. Also, I like to think F!Trey would have a very average hair, that never go below shoulders

Cater

I once saw Gyaru Cater art, I inhaled this into my soul. Cater would be either, this Gyaru like girlie on her phone 24/7 (Like Yandere Simulator bullies), OR an average TikTok girl, that uses slang a lil too much (I am more into Gyaru version myself, BUT WHATEVER.)

Ace

The first thing that came to my mind is that F!Ace has very VERY long hair, that she ties into a braid (Like Raiden Shogun kind of length), just so when she turns around fast, she would hit anyone behind her with that massive ass braid. Like, that sounds like very Ace thing to do tbh??? 😭

Deuce

Here I cant decide if Deuce would delinquent era as a girl would still be a delinquent, OR a mean bully girl. Because, those two are kinda the same breed 😭. But if delinquent: A fucking one side shaved (lesbian ahh haircut) and now Deuce is trying to grow that shit out. If a mean girl: ... Do you guys know Heathers? :3

Leona

I shall inhale BUFF WOMAN, WITH MY WHOLE SOUL. Like, F!Leona would have that 6 pack, my friend said she would have big booba, but GENUINELY, I cant imagine that, like FLAT QUEEN. Also, the same as Deuce, one side shaved, with a fucking tattoo, also the hair side has a little silly braid

Ruggie

A chin length hair, with a shmol ponytail behind, like... Shmol shmol. Also I imagine F!Ruggie to dress as a man sometimes, because: DID YOU KNOW THAT FEMALE HYENAS HAVE PSEUDO-PENIS—

Jack

F!Jack the buff tall woman with a wolf cut. Please. MAKE THIS A THING. I BEG YOU ALL. I BEG ON MY KNEES. Also maybe F!Jack would be a lil bit shorter? Because she-wolves (or whatever you call it in English) are shorter than males? Idk, I was sleeping through biology classes

Azul

OFFICE. SIREN. F!AZUL. Thats all I have to say, hair in a bun, glasses, and cunt mixed with formal look. Azul is somewhere between spectrum of F!Floyd and F!Jade, because as F!Floyd is more cunty, F!Jade is more formal, so perfect balance

Floyd

As I said, Office Siren F!Floyd, but... MORE CUNT. And by this I mean like... Bayonetta level of the cunt. Also, a quite long hair, that are either in ponytail, or nothing at all

Jade

Idk if I can call her an Office Siren if she's the most formal out of the 3, but sure, whatever, lets make whole Octavinelle serve cunt in industry. F!Jade has shorter hair than F!Floyd, and they're always somehow tied up

Kalim

Do you know those silly girls, that go to parties every time, do tiktok trends, do many different hair styles daily, shares her things with everyone, and may or may not be into things that may be considered cringe? Like hobby horseing? DO I NEED TO SAY MORE.

Jamil

Mental support girlie. "Girl's girl" girlie. Yes— Like, yes. F!Jamil would have this kind of karen mom sense of fashion, if you get what I mean, also cardigan at ALL TIMES, if she wont do the "grandma cardigan" move ITS NOT F!JAMIL!

Vil

Funfact: When I imagined F!Vil I basically imagined MY FUCKING BULLY FROM MIDDLE SCHOOL 💀. WOW. F!Vil got that style, got that fashion, got that tits (Im sorry, I needed to type that. That was stronger than me). Curly long hair, many different hairstyles, bro is basically now nicer Velvette from Hazbin Hotel (How many references and comparing I already done. Holy moly)

Rook

I recently realised that, if Rook had a little longer hair, he would be basically Yumeko from Kakegurui, so lets go with that, because Im ain't fucking with his ugly ass hair cut. Rook would also be taken by straight males and called YANDERE 😭 Another nightmare to my collection...

Epel

Tomboy. T o m b o y. Tom-boy. TOMBOY. tomboy. T O M B O Y. Need I say more? F!Epel would AND WILL look like a man the same way Epel looks like a woman. I am not taking this back. Let that shit sink in.

Idia

Discord kitten or this one girl you hear at 3 am in Valorant that rages over shitty players and just cuses everyone out in the most diabolic way possible. No inbetween. F!Idia would look like Sucy from Little Witch Academia, with longer hair tho

Ortho

Robo-girl? Yes. For F!Ortho I think she would be the same as normal Ortho, with just more shaped hips, and that's basically it? Nothing crazy, I mean you can play a little with his design, like make his ,,shoes" look more like heels, but other than that?

Malleus

Starting with hairstyle, do you know Raiden Mei from Honkai Impact 3rd? Like... Herrscher of Thunder? That's basically this kind of hair cut, no one can tell me otherwise. Also F!Malleus this kind of girl to fight and beat your ass in heels 😭

Lilia

He already looks like a girl. So F!Lilia would be a little bit more... Manly? But in like... Female way? I dunno, Lilia is complicated person. In her general era she would have a very short hair, buzz cut even, but in current era, she grew some balls and now she can even tie it into ponytail (Also another girl to beat your ass up in heels)

Sebek

F!Sebek fits in both long hair and short hair. For short hair I would go for like basic shoulder length that is always tied up (you know, for fight), for long hair I would go with same concept, but more for tying similiar to the one that has Charlie from Hazbin Hotel (the new design)

Silver

... Hair that looks short, but are actually long due to nearly invisible ponytail in the back, that's basically like rat tail hairstyle. No. I wont elaborate. (Ngl, that shit is lowkey good for fighting) (Probably Lilia fucked up her hair)

(holy shit what did I created)

[ryuichirou]

Replies

About moray sketches, Idia’s little affair with Sebastian, drawing and art and other things.

Anonymous asked:

Morays are so derpy

They really are… the more I look at them the more obsessed I get lol those silly faces

Anonymous asked:

Those eels are so goofy-looking. Are they your favorite sea creature? If not, then what?

Thank you, Anon!

To be honest, I don’t think I have a favourite sea creature. For now, due to my love for the Octa-trio, I have a big soft spot for moral eels and octopuses. A couple of years ago we had a phase during which we read a lot about sharks. The fact that baby sharks are called pups!! I’m still obsessed with this fact.

In general, sea is fascinating and truly beautiful, but it was never really my thing, so I don’t know much about different kinds of creatures… Should definitely work on that 🤔

Anonymous asked:

🗣🔥BLACK BUTLER MENTIONED🔥🗣

OOoo Sebastián if Ciel finds out you're in troubleee

HEHE YES even though we still aren’t back to our Kuroshitsuji era and I just replied about it the other day… The desire to ship these two was sudden but too strong to resist.

I think Ciel would just roll his eyes to be honest, maybe he would get a bit disgusted… but overall, the whole thing probably happened due to their investigation, so he shouldn’t complain. Or is it jealousy that sours his mood?~

Anonymous asked:

Idia’s hips are so deliciously grabbable. Grabbing them, nibbling them, groping them, hmmm.

And with how thin he is one would think that he would be too sharp around the edges to probably grab. But I guess his bones make him easier to grab… Cute!

Anonymous asked:

The way Idia looks in the last panel…..I don’t think I would be able to resist going back and “interrogating” him more, perhaps all day even. I’m very dedicated, what can I say? 😔

What a hardworking person you are! This is truly inspiring.

I think the more you “interrogate” Idia, the more “interrogatable” he looks… this is magical.

tardigrade-misfit asked:

I’ve come to a realization that I’ve only ever seen one thing drawn of Leona and I need to see more of the lazy lion man 😭

Omg you’re right, we only posted him once (not counting a chibi drawing + fem!Leona in a big genderswap post). It’s so funny, I feel like I draw him every now and then because of commissions (thank you, everyone orz), but at the end of a day we barely have anything Leona-related. The only character less lucky than him is probably poor Cater…

To be completely honest, Leona just isn’t usually on my radar, and even though I sketch him sometimes, those sketches rarely get finished and are mostly posted on ko-fi. Sorry 😔

Anonymous asked:

my god, imagine a more messed up alternate universe where the Asim family had a "last one standing" competition to decide the successor... The head of the family dies and suddenly Kalim is put against his siblings, cousins, uncles, aunts, ecc. He would be so bummed out. As soon as he says "Jamil, I think we'll have to kill my family" Jamil just starts crying from joy. Yes! Let's kill all these rich people! And also make you the new head, that would be cool I guess...

AAAH honestly Anon it would be such an interesting story to read and/or watch. Kalim would probably consider giving up multiple times, but ultimately decide against it because he doesn’t really want to die either lol

To Jamil it would absolutely be a joy though. I think some of Kalim’s relatives would try to bribe him out of helping Kalim though, “kill him in his sleep and we will give you a better life” type of deal. But Jamil would refuse~ Not because he’s loyal to Kalim or anything, of course of course.

Anonymous asked:

Since that other anon asked about Epel might as well join in: Jack and Epel. I can see Epel looking up to Jack because "Oh strong muscle man, wanna be like him" so of course Jack being the goodest boy that he is would help Epel train... in more ways than one ;)

Anon, this ship is so good visually with the size difference and all, and Epel salivating at the thought of Jack’s muscles because he really wants to have muscles himself (in reality he is just attracted to Jack) is such a good idea, and we absolutely see its potential… but unfortunately somehow they don’t click with us just yet. Maybe it’s because it feels too fluffy, with Epel getting in trouble and Jack getting him out of trouble? Maybe we’re missing this spice because we haven’t seen a lot of their interactions. Only time will tell…

Nothing against it of course though! Epel should get railed by a big wolf man.

[merakiui]

Alight Mera. Your 10 character game with the forms of Heartslabuyl, Scarabia and Pomfiore.

>:) ooooooo

(ask game)

Marry - Trey (hands down the best husband material)

Drink tea with - Epel (and we're putting on obnoxiously bad posh accents and being silly about holding the cups and drinking the tea hehe)

Party with - Kalim (I just know all of his parties are wild and fun!!)

Kiss - Cater (besties kissing besties except the romantic tension is off the charts for him and me. Pining era is over!!!!)

Go out on a date with - Riddle (bookstore date..... orz café date........)

Push down the stairs - Ace (who brings a mont blanc to an unbirthday party? this guy, am I right? 🙄 joking aside, I could never intentionally push dear Ace down the stairs. But an accident... now that's different and it was likely because we were messing around at the top of the stairs. ;;;)

Slap - Jamil (still not over the fact he BANISHED us to the edge of the world when he could have just kept me by his side and banished the fish instead. :< missed opportunity...)

Invade the dreams of - Rook (I need to know what this man dreams of. What do you fear, Rook? When you close your eyes, what is it you see?)

Take a nap with - Deuce (taking a long nap and then waking up and not knowing what time it is, and then we proceed to panic because neither of us did the homework yet and we both think it's morning already. (it's not) lol)

Rob - Vil (I'm going to steal his heart and also some expensive cosmetics. <3 you won't even realize it's missing, Vil.)

[cerealmonster15]

Hi Cereal!! For the ask game, maybe 41, 42, and 43? :]

hi sand!!!!

41-Who’s your favorite character you’ve written?

pours one out for donut rvb he was my fave to write about for so long... most of my early fics were about him before i Didnt Write For A While lol. i also loved writing tango omgcp... whether or not they were accurate is another story sdfjlkfes... and then my brain fell asleep for a while

in my CURRENT ERA of fic writing. well. 🤔 lol it kinda goes hand in hand with my doodles actually lol my fave characters to both doodle and write are twst boys... cater diamond + jamil/azul <- those two are a SET. caters fun and i Love Him, but also writing jamil and azul like, it's DIFFICULT bc theyre very smart and complex characters [everyone in twst is complex and it's intimidating to write LOL] BUT in my silly ha ha nonserious [usually] realm of things, they are VERY fun to write together for bouncing off Funnies... they make me literally audibly laugh in the actual game and i try to harness that energy a lot of the time when i write for them. but they have a lot of potential for jokes, and genuine soft sweetness, but also some angst? like theres a lotta ways to go with them and it's fun exploring them TOGETHER!!!!!!!

Same with cater ive just had jami/azu on the brain for like a day

also writing normal was fun, ive only done it once but in terms of doodles he fits the blorbo slot that donut/tango/cater have for the dndads realm, so i could see him being my fave to write for if i get more dndads fic inspiration in the future!

^ questions that literally require like one word to answer and i gave multiple paragraphs LOL SORRY

42-What’s your favorite title that you’ve come up with?

ough. i dont like most of my titles LOL JSKLFJDS they are always SO last minute and the part i think the least about. i think i'd go with "The Comfort of Familiarity" [twst, jami/azu] or "New Memories in Good Company" [twst, riddle&cater friendship fic]. those are also i think some of my fave fics ive written in general so maybe thats why i also have titles i like more than others LOL

43-Is there a trope or idea that you’d really like to write but haven’t yet?

OOH. thats a good one hmmmmmmMMmmmm. ok so two sides of the spectrum here - on one hand i LOVE LOVE FOREVER LOVE my usual silly cute fluffy goofs. i love those. i wish to keep writing those forever. HOWEVER. i also sometimes get embarrassed about being Too Cliche so maybe sometimes i feel like im holding myself from doing More Of That Full Blast kfldsjfel i dont have a specific rn bc my brain is static but. sometimes i want MORE corny cheesiness.

BUT ALSO. that doesnt really answer the question jkslfj AND on the other hand i do think i also want to like... sometimes i want to try writing more charged serious drama w/some angst? nothing too crazy serious and heavy bc still At My Core im a goofy lil guy who likes to feel good and i wanna make people feel good. but like that lovesong [dndads] fic idea i talked about a while ago... that one would be a bit more 'serious' in tone and a lil more steamy [but in more of like a fade-to-black way jsklfd im still not into writing explicit things] themed thing. it would be very different than what im used to which is why im SCARED to try lol. im afraid i wont pull it off and will look silly for trying >.>!!!!!

but one of my more recent [twst] fics was a lil more serious in tone so i am trying to branch out a little!! it still had a mix of some goofs and was overall a comfort fic at the end of things so im like, easing my way into different things klsfjfls

OK SORRY I TALK FOREVER THANK U SAND!!!

[fic asks!]

[timetravel-a]

hello ! so, for those who are not aware, i am completely insane ! i’m also not a huge fan of the way the dr. who revived series continued on the story from the classic era. combining these two factors has resulted in my brain creating this HUGE parallel canon w/ OC incarnations for the doctor, the master & the rani! in this post i will attempt to summarize this universe that is canon to several muses on this blog, if it sounds like complete crazy-talk, that’s because it is.

in the furthest reaches of space, at the edge of the universe, the eigh/th doctor battled a anti-matter entity that threatened the safety of every living creature. sealing it away on a planet about to exit reality through a rift and damaged in combat, he regenerates into his ninth self, portrayed by jamee/la jamil.

after stopping some silly space pirates attempting to make off with the creature they thought was loot, she begins travelling the universe in the company of two of them. she’s a lot less whimsical than her previous self, perhaps a bit more posh than she should be, but it’s all good fun.

she runs into macqueen!master several times, a lot more ruthless and mad after his defeat in dark eyes ; which eventually forces the doctor to wound him fatally, triggering regeneration. 

from the ashes of failure emerges a new master, played by than/dine newton, who is more than well aware of how inadequate and manic her villainy had gotten. it becomes a mission then to better oneself and build upon the shattered legacy of her previous selves, to be an actual unstoppable force of evil that CAN and WILL see the doctor defeated.

of course, the actual path to betterment she walks down on sees her encounters with the doctor becoming more and more jovial  -  and while she’s far more deadly, it seems the doctor is more than ever convinced she can redeem her oldest friend.

eventually, jamil!doctor’s tenure ends, and arsh/er ali takes the role. the doctor becomes a lot more at peace with himself than ever before, a lot more self aware, some say a bit too self aware. but the show goes on, and new companions and friends are made along the way.

at some point, the doctor’s old companion, romanadvoratrelundar, joins him on his adventures to see herself free of the shackles of gallifreyan politics. later on they recruit yoko moromao, a student who helped them beat an eldritch horror that destroyed her school, among them and the three set off on further adventures.

that’s it so far, hopefully i don’t add more

also the rani is in there somewhere played by meera s/yal i forgot im sorry listen she has like two stories across fifty years of show don’t judge me

this is not a ripoff of jack’s post i swear it’s called INSPIRATION

[ethelbertpaul444-blog]

Jameela Jamil: ‘I won’t become a double agent for the patriarchy’

The former presenter turned The Good Place star on why she refuses to stay speechless about the consequences of the #MeToo, undesirable torso principles and the tabloid media

When British notorieties make it big in the US, they go through a by now familiar process of becoming Hollywoodified: they get thinner, more groomed, less enjoyable, all the while insisting that their occasional deployment of a quaint British swearword testifies they haven’t changed a bit. This is not Jameela Jamil.

” We can not talk in here, it’s too fucking populace ,” Jamil, the onetime T4 presenter returned US sitcom star, affirms, looking around the private members’ society. I’d intimated it because it’s near what is now her home in West Hollywood, which she shares with her suitor of three years, the musician James Blake. But as we walk through the association she decrees it” a bit you are familiar, whatever , you know what I necessitate ?” All around us, people are wearing the regulation kits of LA beautiful people: long garbs with sandals, or designer jeans with vintage T-shirts and costly managers. Jamil, by distinguish, is wearing an absurdly short and close-fisted dress with chunky heels. Her mane and makeup appear endearingly unpolished.

” I like to get it on myself, because I don’t like being contoured ,” she mentions, referring to the makeup ploy that creates the apparition of a thinner look and higher cheekbones, popularised by Kim Kardashian, who we’ll get at in a minute.” Also, I inevitably get made up to look a different ethnicity- whiter .” If the onetime breakfast Tv presenter Cat Deeley ogled born and spawned in Santa Monica five minutes after acre here to present So You Meditate You Can Move, Jamil still looks like a London girl on her road to Camden Market.

Most British parties still know Jamil best from her era as a presenter on Radio 1, and her three-year stint on pop culture picture T4, from 2009, where she was a fun and lively interviewer who, for example, informed Russell Brand lives on air that interviewing him was ” a nightmare “. But in the US she has become a bona fide star, thanks to her capacity in NBC’s The Good Place, made by the people behind Parks And Recreation. Set in the afterlife and co-starring Kristen Bell and Ted Danson, The Good Place is one of those rare shows that manages to be very smart and excessively silly, in which provided discourses about Kierkegaard and Plato( as the specific characteristics try to figure out if they’re good or bad) wipe up against laughs about Blue Ivy and James Franco. Jamil is very funny as Tahani, a Little Miss Perfect socialite who namedrops for Britain:” I haven’t been this upset since my good friend Taylor was rudely outdone by my other good friend Kanye, who was defending our friend, Beyonce .” The evidence has just finished killing its third season.

After a breast cancer scare at the age of 28, Jamil ruled she would no longer wait to do the things she wanted to do. So she endeavoured to LA in 2015, originally hoping to find work as a screenwriter. To her catch, her administrator reassured her to audition for The Good Region instead and, even though she had never played before, she got the component. Initially, she pled the show’s creator, Michael Schur, to rethink his decision,” because I didn’t want to make an ultimate tit of myself in front of the whole world “.

Dress, Adam Selman at Desperate LA; cuff and echo, Leigh Miller Jewelry; shoes, the palatines. Picture: Ramona Rosales for the Guardian figcaption > generator >

Like Tom Haverford, the specific characteristics in Parks And Recreation played by an Indian-American actor( Aziz Ansari) but illustrated on the appearance as plainly American, Jamil, whose mothers are Indian and Pakistani, dallies a reputation who is defined by her Englishness; her ethnicity is not such issues. Similarly, the two young male produces are give full play to an African-American( William Jackson Harper) and a Filipino-Canadian( Manny Jacinto ), and in neither bag is their ethnicity a rail to them having on-screen mysteries with women from other backgrounds. It’s not so much better colourblind throw as colour-neutral, situations of extreme strangenes in mainstream US TV.

” There was a moment when we were filming season one when I realised I was in a scene with two other women from south Asian backgrounds, and it wasn’t commented on in the display or anything ,” Jamil enunciates.” And “weve all” offended by this, for our scoot to not be fetishised in some manner, and we were stunned by how shocked we were .”

Meanwhile, Jamil has made on another high-profile role, that of an extremely vocal connoisseur of luminary culture. She started an Instagram account announced I Weigh on which maidens announced images of themselves and speak how much they “weigh”- not in kilos, but in a better quality they like about themselves (” Good friend”,” Bad singer”,” Loving sister”, and so on .) She made headlines earlier this year when she criticised Kim Kardashian for promoting something called an” lust suppressant lollipop “. ” Fuck off. You appalling and harmful affect on young girls ,” Jamil wrote on Twitter. Kardashian later deleted the post.

On her blog, Jamil often takes the extremely bizarre pace- for a personality- of calling out correspondents and fellow performers by refer:” Some unspeakable female called Heidi Parker for the Daily Mail Online has written an article, figure shaming a heavily, heavily pregnant Jessica Biel ,” begins one usual record. She wrote a smart take on the Aziz Ansari gossip, after the comedian was accused of having pushed a year into having copulation, and related a lack of interest in female authorization with the rising availability of porn.( As it happens, Jamil shares a manager with Ansari .)

She has plenty of reasons to be critical of the British tabloid press: when she started on T4, the papers criticised her for is just too thin. Then, when she gained force after taking steroids for her asthma, she was criticised for is just too paunch; the tabloids wrote unflattering pictures of her crouch over in the street.

In The Good Locate. Image: NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images figcaption > root >

” Outside my house! To pick up my keys! And then photos of my arse are in magazines – it’s so invasive, it was necessary to illegal. But it actually opened my gazes, because when I was a sizing 6 or 8, they only took photographs of me that would reach me inspect good, constituting on the welcome mat or whatever. As soon as I was a immensity 10, they only want photographs of you inspecting bad, like, with your lip open or looks shut. No one tried to make my photo when I was moving when I was thin, only when I was fatty ,” she replies, just getting started.

She was considered fat at a immensity 10?” Yes! Seriously, come up. But what really upset me was that they never substantiated any of my professional success, such as that I was the first female to host the following chart see on Radio 1. It was always about my failure to fulfil some Victoria’s Secret prototype .”

Jamil now has a rule: that she doesn’t want any images of herself to be airbrushed. In this, she is one of a new generation of the status of women speaking out against the artifice of personality photography: last year, Lupita Nyong’o criticised Grazia magazine for removing her afro ponytail; and Solange Knowles grumbled when theEvening Standard magazine removed her crown of laces. But I tell Jamil she’s the first person I’ve encountered who forbids any retouching.

Stylist: Anna Su at Art Department. Whisker: Robert Lopez for Solo Artists/ Oribe Haircare. Above: crown, H& M; short-liveds, Vivetta; echo and bracelet, Leigh Miller Jewelry. Opening photo: jumpsuit, Urban Outfitters; necklace and ring, Leigh Miller Jewelry. Picture: Ramona Rosales for the Guardian figcaption > beginning >

“Really?” she adds, amazed.” I don’t know most women who’s truly joyous with how they gaze, because they’re always aspiring to this perfect aesthetic, and I simply find it truly poison and I’ve had enough. I did a tweet recently about a tabloid that described Queen Latifah as looks a lot like a’ ashore whale’- are you able suppose ?” I can, and I add that disrespecting Queen Latifah- with her decades of success- seems incongruous, like disrespecting Oprah Winfrey. Jamil cocks a somewhat sceptical eyebrow.” I symbolize, to be fair, Oprah does a lot of weight-loss promotions, so part of Oprah’s industry is her weight-loss waverings, so that’s different .”

The sad actuality is that many of these articles and publications are written and edited by females .” Even if a woman edits the periodical, a somebody owns the company and I think it’s scary to adults how independent ladies can be ,” suggests Jamil.” It’s not in the patriarchy’s interest for us to be multifaceted. They want us to worry about how we inspect, because it slows us down and we’re then less likely to surpass them. Likewise, it benefits me to establish what I actually look like, because then there’s no appraise in tabloid photographs of me. Beings are used to seeing my puckers and discerns and under-eye circles, so the paparazzi can’t’ catch me out ‘,” she says, sitting ponderous sarcasm on the last three words.

Jamil with her lover, James Blake Photograph: Kate Green/ Alpha Press

It’s easy to be bold about testifying your true-life cheek to the world when it is as naturally ravishing as Jamil’s; in person, her large-hearted brown noses, long, sloppy pitch-black mane and curvy representation manufacture her looking almost cartoonishly beautiful. And on her Instagram account, she affixes batch of flattering selfies.” I’m all for wearing nice robes and enjoying yourself, but that’s just a fraction of the things I’m interested in ,” she reads.” I make sure I articulated my correspond out there and my campaigning, and I hope the image I’ve projected is a rounded one .” She is looking down and expressing more humbly than before, as if she’s still figuring it all out. Does it really help girls and women to be told to feel better about themselves when the person doing the telling looks like a simulation? Jamil winces a little, because she doesn’t see it like that. She talks about her” unsexy temperament” and” total clumsiness”, which would come across a little like Miss America claiming they’re actually super-dorky since they are wear glasses had Jamil not knowledge so much better bullying about her expression as a child.

Whether about her heavines, or her skin colour, the bullying went on for as long as she knows how recollect. By persons under the age of 12, she was 5ft 10 in and large-scale for her senility, her look contained within acne and prepareds, and at her private all-girls institution in London( she was on a award ), it was relentless.” They announced me the Fat Paki ,” she recalls.

But that’s not even a pun!

” I know, it’s like my early rap epithet .”

As recently as 2016, she was racially abused in London.” I was in Notting Hill the day after the referendum and someone supposed,’ Go home, Paki !’ The daylight after! I was like,’ How long have you been waiting to say that, teammate ?'” she does, both amused and furious.

When she was 14, Jamil developed an eating disorder that she now sees as an attempt to gain some ascertain over their own lives that detected tumultuous, and to fit in with the girls at clas ,” although it didn’t help “. She credits a major coincidence with changing the course of their own lives- she was 17 when a gondola stumbled her, damaging her sticker. She was stuck in couch for a year and thought she’d never be able to walk again without a Zimmer frame.” There’s something about not being able to move that gives you a new respect for your person, and I frankly think that collision saved me .”

Throughout all this, Jamil’s home life was difficult; her parents were unhappily wedded and divorced when she was very young. She was also sexually assaulted by strangers twice.The first time happened when she was 12 and walking along Oxford Street when a somebody grabbed her by the groin.” At 3.30 in the afternoon in front of John Lewis, for God’s reason ,” she near hollers. When he wouldn’t “lets get going”, she had to run down wall street and shed herself against a wall to shake him off, then run away. When she was 15, she was dragged by a stranger into a auto-” in Belsize Park! The more affluent part of London !”- and was saved simply because a stranger accompanied her struggling.” I never considered those knows traumatic til now, because I thought they happened to everyone and were normal. And now I realise that maybe that’s true, but it shouldn’t be .”

This realisation has emboldened her to speak out against the movie industry. Jamil feels some things have improved, thanks to the #MeToo action:” peculiar and disreputable makes” no longer suggest finds at 9pm and men don’t even try to grip, let alone kiss her, at the end of a join. But the situation is far from perfect. Jamil is close friends with Daniele Bernfeld, a movie manager who was viciously assaulted by the actor Emile Hirsch in 2015; Hirsch was given a fine and be subject to 15 eras in jail.” But he’s never stopped labor- meantime, your best friend has PTSD ,” Jamil enunciates with evident fury. Hirsch is now building Once Upon A Time In Hollywood, Quentin Tarantino’s film about the Charles Manson slaughters- a film about the deaths among a woman, Sharon Tate, directed by a adult who has admitted he knew that Harvey Weinstein onslaught maidens, co-starring a follower who aggression a woman.

” It is so darknes. How dare any of the people involved in that movie wear Time’s Up pins to the Golden Globes? Can parties really not hire men who have almost killed maids ?” she says.

And more, there are plenty of women who, at the very least, play down male savagery. Not long before Jamil and I assemble, Germaine Greer, for reasons known simply to her, told an audience at the Hay festival:” Instead of thinking of desecration as a spectacularly violent crime- and some assaults are- think it is right it as non-consensual, that is bad fornication .”

” Bloody, brutal Germaine Greer !” Jamil exclaims, startling everyone around us.” Rape is not bad sexuality. She precisely needs to get in the bucket and lives there and set up store there. And the older French females !” she adds, referring to the word 100 French brides, including Catherine Deneuve, ratified, condemning the #MeToo campaign for its” hatred of men and sexuality “.

” I wonder if older wives look back and realise they’ve known pain and want us to stop talking about it, because they don’t want to think about it. But we’re just trying to stop it happening to the benefit of future generations of girls ,” she says.

Does Jamil ever be concerned that being outspoken might hurt her vocation?

” Oh, I don’t care about that. I can’t not say this because then you become a double agent for the patriarchy, which has always been my greatest anxiety .”

And more one cumbersome actuality persists: that her director is Dave Becky, who is not only Ansari’s manager, but too the onetime administrator of Louis CK, who admitted to sexual wrongdoing last year. Becky was accused by two of CK’s victims of telling them not to talk about it, and later issued a public apology.

” He’s no longer Louis CK’s administrator ,” she speaks with a excitable chortle.” But I decided to be with him because he represents so many wives I admire .”( Becky likewise represents Amy Poehler, Issa Rae and Natasha Lyonne .)

And neither he nor Schur ever alerted her off speak about Ansari?

” No. Never .”

Almost every feminist are known to the relevant recommendations of making a compromise to get on in the modern world, and if you work in the leisure business you are more familiar than most. And if there are certain elements Jamil is still figuring out , no one can doubt her fearlessnes in doing this just as she embarks on her Hollywood career.

Her boyfriend, James Blake, has been a huge source of the assistance provided. They knew each other in London, but got together when they moved to LA at the same go.” Living with him has been very resolve for me ,” she speaks. And in turn her campaigning has been eye-opening for Blake:” He’s seen the impact of stirring yourself a spokesperson of reason to the people you’re lucky enough to reach .”

There is an obvious ambiguity in that it made coming to LA, in many ways the world-wide epicentre of body neuroses and misuse enablement, to move Jamil into a warrior on behalf of women’s self-image and security at work. But she says it was being now that propagandized her over the edge. And, make like that, it’s depressing that more ladies haven’t had that reaction, too.

” I precisely cannot stay speechless any more, I can’t ,” she adds.” I don’t care if I’m going down- I’m going down in flames. I’m fine to not work in this industry. But I’m not fine to not say something .”

* The Good Place returns to Netflix in the autumn

Commenting on this section? If you would like your statement to be considered for inclusion on Weekend magazine’s symbols page in book, delight email weekend @theguardian. com, including your name and address( not for publication ).

Read more: https :// www.theguardian.com/ lifeandstyle/ 2018/ jul/ 28/ jameela-jamil-wont-become-double-agent-patriarchy

[theconservativebrief]

The second half of 2018’s fall TV premiere week brings with it a slew of comedies, new and old, as the afterlife dwellers of NBC’s The Good Place move on to a new location and scene stealer Lil Rel Howery finally gets his own sitcom with Fox’s Rel (which technically debuted a few weeks ago but moves to its regular time slot this week).

But the week’s biggest “new” series is Murphy Brown, the 1988 stalwart that has returned for its first season since 1998, with most of the original cast in tow. (It’s the 11th season of Murphy Brown overall.) Does Candice Bergen still have it? Do you even have to ask that question? (You saw Book Club, right? Good movie!)

Oh, and there’s also a show where God friends somebody on Facebook, and it’s nowhere near as bad as that sounds. Promise!

Few of these shows are great, and as critics, we often have limited information on whether they’ll get better. (It’s rare to impossible for broadcast networks, especially, to send out many episodes for review beyond the first couple.) But there’s something in all of these shows worth checking out, especially if you’re a particular fan of their genres.

(A note: We’ve only given ratings to shows where we feel we’ve seen enough episodes to judge how successful they will be long-term, which for right now is just Murphy Brown and The Good Place. In the case of both shows, we’ve seen new unaired episodes in addition to prior seasons.)

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Good news: The Good Place is back.

The NBC comedy is one of the best shows currently airing. It’s smart, it’s touching, it’s funny, it’s well-acted — and even in its third season, it’s firing on all cylinders.

Season three picks up where season two ended, with our heroes sent back to Earth to test out Michael’s (Ted Danson) theory that, given the opportunity, they would change their lives enough to make it into the Good Place.

Of course, saving the souls of everyone’s favorite humans — self-professed “trash bag” Eleanor (Kristen Bell), mortally indecisive Chidi (William Jackson Harper), navel-gazing socialite Tahani (Jameela Jamil), and Jacksonville, Florida’s very own Jason (Manny Jacinto) — isn’t quite that easy. But it wouldn’t be The Good Place if it was.

From the start, showrunner Mike Schur has been perfecting the art of subverting expectations and throwing curveballs into the story at a rate that would cripple pretty much any other show. The new season doesn’t let up in that regard, as its twists and turns pull off a three-season hat trick.

That it works comes down to the fact that nothing on The Good Place is done for shock value; at the risk of sounding preachy, it’s all in service of a larger arc, as well as a reminder — whether you believe in the existence of a Good Place or not — to be good, even when it seems impossible. —Karen Han

The Good Place debuts Thursday at 8 pm Eastern on NBC. Don’t miss it, ya dink!

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The first three episodes of the new season of Murphy Brown, which reunites liberal lion news anchor Murphy and most of her pals at a cable news morning show, aren’t very good. The jokes are mostly easy potshots at Donald Trump (would you believe that Murphy calls him “orange” in the first episode?!), and the live studio audience is so over-mic’ed that every little utterance they make sounds like wild laughter and applause.

In the 2018 revival, Murphy and her friends are hosting a sort of Fox & Friends for the type of left-leaning folks who watch Murphy Brown. And putting Murphy in the hollow confines of a morning show could be fun! But the new Murphy Brown doesn’t even try to explore these contradictions, or the sheer anachronism of the show’s existence in this era.

It instead exists in a world in which support for Trump is inexplicable and if the press just found the right words to speak, it might make him disappear; this is a show that takes every opportunity to harangue America, Republicans, and the press for not having the calm, collected wisdom of Murphy Brown.

And yet there’s something here. For as sitcom-silly as it is for Murphy to be dragged into a tweet war with the president in the season premiere, the heroine of this revival serves as a specific panacea to people old enough to remember Murphy Brown, peddling a kind of sitting-on-your-couch activism designed not to effect change but, instead, to make you feel less alone in these scary times.

And every so often, there’s a flash of the old show’s panache, or a line reading that Bergen knocks dead, or a flicker of terror at how bad things have gotten and how bad they could still get, and the show comes to life, for a moment at least. It’s not good, but it’s comforting. —Todd VanDerWerff

Murphy Brown season 11 debuts Thursday at 9:30 pm Eastern on CBS, with a special 35-minute episode. For much more on Murphy old and new, read our comprehensive explainer.

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On paper, the premise of God Friended Me sounds so very, very stupid. Miles, an atheist played by the effortlessly charming Brandon Micheal Hall, hosts a podcast where he dunks on believers. And then one day, he receives a Facebook friend request from “God.” He accepts the friend request, and God suggests other friends, who turn out to be part of a massive puzzle that could only be assembled by someone omniscient.

Does Miles start believing in God as a result? Nah. To God Friended Me’s credit, the show lets Miles think that what’s happening to him involves either the actual God … or such a sophisticated artificial intelligence that it seems like God but is, instead, just really good at predicting what people are going to do. (Shades of the late, lamented Person of Interest!)

Miles spends a lot of the pilot trying to figure out who “God” is, like he’s not in a TV show where it will take him 100 episodes or more to solve the mystery (and where he will almost certainly learn that “God” is actually God or, like, a conglomerate of psychic rabbis). But somehow, God Friended Me has a good shot at wearing down your (very reasonable) defenses.

Hall earns my earlier descriptor of “effortlessly charming,” bearing even more of the load than he did on ABC’s one-season-and-done comedy The Mayor. And the series has surrounded him with equally likable supporting players, including Violett Beane as a journalist who joins his cause, and Joe Morton as his — dramatic irony!!! — minister father?!

If God Friended Me were at all cynical about its premise, it would be unbearable. Instead, it’s earnest and cheesy and a little stupid, which turns out to be the right approach. When the puzzle pieces snap into place, it works, the viewer’s cynicism be damned, because it’s silly in the way that a golden retriever licking your face is silly — you eventually just kind of give in and laugh about it. —TV

God Friended Me debuts Sunday, September 30, at 8:30 pm Eastern on CBS. If you grew up in the Protestant Church, try singing the title to the tune of “Love Lifted Me.” You will never be able to stop. You’re welcome.

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The mileage you get out of Rel will likely depend on how much you like its namesake, Lil Rel Howery. On the bright side, objectively speaking, Howery has charm to spare, and after supporting turns in Get Out and Insecure, it’s nice to see him as a leading man. Rel’s creators, Josh Rabinowitz and Kevin Barnett (The Carmichael Show), also seem to be keenly aware of their star’s strengths, as the show’s pilot opens with a monologue that depends entirely on how well Howery can sell a scene where he’s essentially talking to himself.

That said, Howery is stuck doing most of the heavy lifting. Rel is based on Howery’s own life — his character is named Lil Rel and, like Howery, is divorced with two children and from the West Side of Chicago — but the specifics and depths that such a correlation ought to provide aren’t quite there. At least, not in the pilot.

Though Rel occasionally plays a little too hard into its multi-camera comedy format (audience laughs are a difficult thing to master; if a show relies on them too much, they become annoying rather than helpful), there’s clearly potential for growth. The natural rapport between Howery and the rest of the cast, including Jessica Moore as Lil Rel’s longtime friend, Jordan L. Jones as his brother, and Sinbad as his father, is great, even if they’re aiming wider with their jokes than Howery, who seems to have something a little more substantive in mind as far as the long game is concerned.

Which is all to say, if you’re a fan of Howery’s work, Rel is worth tuning in to. The series has the potential to become something special — just a little further into the season. —KH

REL airs Sundays at 9:30 pm Eastern on Fox.

Last Man Standing (Friday, 8 pm) returns after a year off the air, with some cast changes and a new network — it used to be on ABC; now it’s on Fox. Tim Allen is still front and center, though. We’ll post more comprehensive thoughts soon, but if you liked Last Man Standing in its first go-round, you will probably like its return episodes.

Last Man Standing’s Fox debut is followed by The Cool Kids (Friday, 8:30 pm), which gathers a lot of great actors (David Alan Grier! Martin Mull! Vicki Lawrence! Leslie Jordan!) only to strand them in a bland story about retirement home shenanigans. With a cast this good and a co-creator like It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia’s Charlie Day, there’s a world in which The Cool Kids evolves rapidly into something truly funny. It’s probably just not this world.

Also, NBC’s Saturday Night Live (Saturday, 11:30 pm Eastern/8:30 pm Pacific) is back this weekend and live coast to coast. Obviously, we haven’t seen it, but the series’ season premieres are often among the best episodes of the season. This one is hosted by Adam Driver with musical guest Kanye West. Keep an eye out for the debut of new cast member Ego Nwodim.

Original Source -> 4 TV shows to check out, from The Good Place to Lil Rel Howery’s new show

via The Conservative Brief