#just in time for Others to reread the fic too since it's been so goddamn long since ive updated!

[accio-lo-ki]

Hii would you have any percabeth fic recs?? I'm just deprived 😭😭

Oh I have a LOT. If you’re as insane about this ship as I am, you’ve probably read all of them but I’m still going to list them down anyway. So, in no particular order:

Whiny Little Pitch by petersgwen - this fic literally made me scream multiple times. everything by this author is chef’s kiss btw. Sports au like no other + exes to lovers

Apartment 305 by waddled - a literal serotonin boost monster of a fic that i’m sure most already know about . i love percy and annabeth’s relationship here, and their characterization. It’s got college romance, olympic athlete Percy, and pipabeth bffism at its finest.

Five Times Percy Jackson Cheated at School by lammermoorian - man this one I reread a lot. I just love it so much. Academic!Percy, domestic percabeth, and just a whole lot of charm

Honesty and Promise Me by Darkmagyk, lammermoorian - never thought I would enjoy punk!annabeth until this fic. it has unexpected pregnancy but it’s so well done! fwb to lovers!

For Real This Time by captainjackson, timelesslords - anything written by this pair is a must-read, but this is one of their best! roman!percy and divorced annabeth! the premise is so interesting and the setting even more so.

Murkiest Intentions by inkncoffee - i feel like this fic shows my age, but when i tell you it’s a classic! jurassic world au (it sounds crazy but it’s so good) i’ve been rereading this since high school and it still holds up

Would it really kill you (if we kissed) by greenconverses - i mean, who hasn’t read this and all the author’s works? but it’s a classic in the fandom and it’s a classic for a reason

The Old Guard au by ananbeth, blackjacktheboss - this series is so well-written with such a solid worldbuilding you have to binge it this instant go

Love me, won’t you by ananbeth, blackjacktheboss - modern romeo and juliet with greece as a backdrop? sign me tf up

the sun stands by petersgwen- if you want pain this is it this fic is pain in fanfiction form

That crosses the white sea by husborth - another well-written masterpiece with percabeth in college

Voice on the radio by PastyPirate - another fandom classic! this one has me giggling kicking my feet everytime i reread it. soulmate au! musician!percy! and friendship bracelets!

The Heart is a Muscle by thebackupkid - I feel like this one is so underrated, but it’s so good and so interesting and distinct! it’s got magic and adventure and fantasy! the worldbuilding again is so good!

Impossible Year by bananannabeth - another pain in fiction form. but this time it has a breakup trope, which destroys me so much I always need years before i want to reread this again. but it’s a masterpiece and you should experience it at least once in your life!!

Game, Set, Match by ananbeth, blackjacktheboss - if there’s a classic percabeth sports au, it’s this. and it has fwb too and it’s just too iconic

Stucco Hearts by ananbeth, writergirl8 - another fandom classic, but this time it’s a soulmate au! this is so so interesting and one of my favorite soulmate aus ever. the worldbuilding is so interesting. another case of it’s a classic for a reason!

Puck It by bipercabeth, jasonmclean - hockey au + friends w benefits. again, another fandom classic. unfortunately i think this was discontinued by the authors but it’s still too good not to read!

Broken glass, no reflection by ananbeth, flyingcrowbar - another (potentially) discontinued fic that I still think about now. it’s a pacific rim au and it’s so. goddamn. good. read it now !!

kiss me once cause you know i had a good night by herecomesthepun - this one is pure comedic fluff and if you need a serotonin boost you have to read it. workplace romance with a twist !

slow motion double vision in a rose blush by herecomesthepun - ooh this one is a high school fwb secret relationship au with a punk percy and a student council president annabeth so basically it’s a classic

and they were roommates by bipercabeth - friends to lovers + college percabeth like no other. another fandom classic

Never Shall We Die by captainjackson, timelesslords - this pirate au series is INSANE it’s crazy good the worldbuilding is amazing it makes me feral actually

Wreck my plan, that’s my man by seaweedbraens - everything by this author is so good they’re a fandom icon but this one in particular i think about daily (tho it’s ongoing)

How to Seduce an Earl by sinfulindulgence - this is hella spicy but it’s also so addicting? i blame bridgerton (this author does so much stuff w this vibe that u should check out too! i liked Revenge of the Duchess as well)

Night at the Museum by lammermoorian - it’s so niche and crazy and camp but also angsty and fluffy and you need to read it right this second ! i LOVE this one

faster than a hairpin trigger by medeaa - this one is the quintessential percabeth fwb college au TO ME. unfortunately it’s (potentially) discontinued, but it’s still one of my favorites.

watch me fall at your feet by maydayparade8123 - this is a really well-written friends to lovers fic that realt explored how confusing it is to fall in love with your best friend like,, it’s a classic but also it’s so real !! this author is a fandom icon but i think they deleted / orphaned their accounts on ff.net and ao3

spellbound by writergirl8 - this is the percabeth hogwarts au. i dont make the rules.

home is where i want to be (but i guess i’m already there) by percivaljackson - fake dating + holidays! this is so well-written!

‘tis the damn season by captainjackson - regency au at its finest!!

-

This is way too long already lmao i dont have the time to list down everything (i have 700+ percabeth fanfics downloaded on my ibooks app 😭) but these are the ones that i can recall at this time !! Happy reading!

[breserker]

Holy crap - I have binge read the entirety of Speaking to Flowers in one day and, my god, it was one of the most well written things i have read. The characterisations and developments, arcs, cultural research, all absolutely blew me away.

The tserith ship is merely a canoe compared to the other ships - having such a talented writer as yourself feeding us shippers with such quality writing is a blessing and keeps us all alive in our lonely lil ship. I just wanted to pass on my sincerest awe, applause and appreciation - truly a marvellous work and i will definitely be rereading many times👏

hey anon holy shit i too have been rereading speaking to flowers except it's taken me like 3 days to reach chapter 17 so believe me when i say i TRULY understand what you mean when you say you binged it in a day or so godDAMN

i really forgot how intense it gets on all sides, i forgot how loveless tseng was at the start and how immense his pivot was, i truly MISS writing him within the context of Speaking to Flowers with his cultural backstory -- sure it's something that possesses since writing like a ghost, it's ever-present in that manner, but i miss those deep dives and how much it informed his worldview and how much of it was sealed away until aeris pried it open. it's almost horrific, how many things that fic tackles and how unapologetically it does so even if it stumbles (pobody's nerfect). honest to god grinding my teeth to do something again with the Uddhu vs Wuataia stuff with Tseng in a fic either like. related to or even separate from speaking to flowers hwo cares i'm going crazy.

the last thing i'll say is that now that i'm also writing my own books, i had the solemn realization, upon rereading parts of speaking to flowers, that there is no way in hell i could've ever hoped to write the books i'm writing now had I not done that fic. it's got a special place in my heart

HAVE A GREAT TIME WITH REBIRTH IT'S TSERITH NATION HOURS -paddles canoe twice as hard-

[thornescratch]

sending this comment for the In Chinatown fic here because my internet won’t let me post it on the fic itself

“Ive read this fic like twenty times every year since it was originally posted. Something about the way Alex and Sasha know each other so well, the Caps ensemble, the heartache and longing and eventually happy ending has captured my brain. Truly one of the all time caps fics for me.

(Shout out to my two favorite moments beyond in this: JC and Alzy’s prank war, Sasha first time shifting on purpose with Alex.)”

I kept this in my inbox for some extra days because rereading it makes me so happy. Thank you, kind anon.

I too miss the incredible weirdness that Sasha Semin brought to everything during his tenure with the Caps; honestly if you told me he really WAS a werewolf I would not blink an eye. I hope he's living his best life in retirement. And no matter what, I'll always be a big fan of Carlzner. (Unless, like they go on a public killing spree or something. That would harsh the buzz a bit.)

...that reminds me how I have a goddamn 120 page Ovi/Sasha fic that I keep thinking "man, just scrap it for parts, no one's ever going to care about this, the main plot point revolves around the goddamn Guardian Project which has essentially been wiped from the internet" and then I get something nice like this and I add another couple pages.

[riality-check]

[carefully sticks a ⭐ on what's in a name, dots and dashes, and like one of the girls] [thinks for a moment] [sticks one more on smin] I am a cozy blanket bundle, please talk to me about your stuff! <3

omg i'm so excited to talk about all of these (and i'm sticking a read more on this post because it's going to be long as hell)

what's in a name, anyway?

Nancy meets his parents about six months in. The whole time, during that catered dinner, his parents call him "Steven." His father asks him about basketball - he never went to his games - and why he wasn't captain yet. His mother made vague references to staying out of trouble, Steven James.

She watches Steve shrink before her eyes. Watches him become something small, so unlike “The Hair” and “King” and the boyfriend she knows.

Nancy isn't sure what to do, and she hates uncertainty more than anything. When they're alone, she tries for a joke about how much she hates when her mother yells "Nancy Grace" across the house.

It's not the same. They both know it. Steve laughs anyway.

Months later, when they're at that Halloween party and Nancy is too drunk to see straight, she calls him "bullshit" but makes sure "Steven" never leaves her mouth.

(She’s angry and scared and a lot of other things, but she doesn’t ever want to see Steve that small again.)

I love writing Nancy's POV so much. Seeing Steve through her eyes was so much fun and such a challenge since I had to go back to who Nancy was during seasons 1 and 2. The "calls him 'bullshit' but makes sure 'Steven' never leaves her mouth" line is probably one of the best I've written.

dots and dashes

Steve yanks himself out of his thoughts and back to the present, where he’s standing at the front desk of Family Video on an exceptionally dead Monday.

Dead, except for one Dustin Henderson.

“I’ve told him no five times, but apparently he only listens to you,” Robin complains.

“Bold of you to assume I listen to Steve,” Dustin shoots back.

“He doesn’t,” Steve tells Robin. “He only listens to me when there’s a crisis, and even then, I have to fight him on it.”

Dustin looks too proud of himself.

“It’s not a compliment, shithead. What has she told you no about?”

This interaction was so spontaneous as I wrote it, and I got so many wonderful comments about how in character it is! So, I'm really proud of it, and I'm laughing as I reread it.

like one of the girls

“No one else is like me, Stevie.”

“I know. It’s why you’re the best I’ve ever had.”

And before Eddie can respond, Steve is out like a goddamn light.

That’s fine. Eddie reaches over and turns out the light before he snuggles right back up to Steve. He’s gonna have to do laundry tomorrow, and he has a long-ass shift at Thatcher, but that’s all fine. All of it can wait.

This moment, right now, head resting on Steve’s chest and arms wrapped around him, is all that matters.

This moment, and the certain knowledge that Eddie is it for Steve. Because for a long time, probably longer than he’s realized, Steve has been it for Eddie, too.

And Eddie falls asleep with the thought that none of those girls, however many there were, have ever had that from Steve.

It took me forever to figure out how to end this fic. It started out as a drabble in my notes app with a vague concept of Steve taking the reins, and it turned into a fic that made one of my friends ask "why is there bowling in the porn." I'm really proud of how soft and sweet this fic ends, and I love its placement in my series.

slay monsters, if needed

But it’s not like she wouldn’t do it. Nancy might be a bitch, has known that since she was eight and got called it to her face for the first time, but she’ll always help people, especially when she’s the only one who can do it.

Live, love, Nancy Wheeler. I love writing her so much, and everything about her in SMIN has just been such a fun thing to do.

I see so much of myself in her it's scary. The bitch line is actually from my own life (it didn't bother me then - I didn't tell anyone because I didn't care. My friend brought it to a teacher - and it certainly doesn't bother me now.)

ask me more questions about my fics!!

[televinita]

Companions...as companions

(or, “things that have been in my drafts since early 2020″)

Back in December, I got overwhelmed by feelings and wrote a random little concept sketch re-imagining The (Tenth) Doctor as a regular human and the companions as various pets, summarizing each one's place in his life ("Donna is a dog he reluctantly fostered for a friend, still reeling from the loss of Rose. She's bigger, older, a bit more stubborn and independent, but he finds himself fond of her anyway. Until she gets adopted, and he has to let her go (enter Martha). A year later she's back in need of a home, and this time he doesn't hesitate.”) I also got sassy about the ending, because it wasn’t THAT serious. "And then Rose comes back, dirty and footsore but HOME, and he lives his best life with his 3 best girls forever and ever, the end.”

Last night I reread it and suddenly went, "What if I cleaned up the writing and made this a real fic," and now I'm a thousand words deep and it's getting elaborate. Nine is standing in for this doctor’s father (wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey), because he had Rose first. I'm also trying to decide if I should stick with the idea of Martha being a cat because Independence (her dynamic is just so different from how R&D pledged their lifelong devotion to traveling with him, and he treated her differently too), or if making her the only non-dog Others her too much and I should just make her a super-smart and elegant breed. But on the bright side, since Ten is a goddamn neverending tragedy and the original version saw me tack on a "SAD ALTERNATE END" section just to stab myself in the face (“At the end of a series of short-lived fosters there's Wilf, sweet old elderly Wilf who looks like Donna, and is there by his side when the cancer finishes wearing him down, too young by half, at 40"), now he gets a full life and the Companion Farewell Tour becomes a shameless Titanic-style/Rainbow Bridge escort of dogs from days past. ...which ALSO makes me cry, but for better reasons.

(And there at the end of time is Rose, younger than he’s ever seen her, crossing over with him when everything goes dark and light at once.)

[scifrey]

I JUST realized why, for the first time in forever, I'm SO engaged with writing a fanfiction and posting it as I go, and why I keep rereading and rereading and rereading the amazing comments and tags.

The last longform fanfic I wrote was in 2015, and it was To a Stranger. I've written some loosely connected drabbles based on Alice Rovai's beautiful art since, but in terms of fanfic, that's all I've done in 8 years.

I used to write and post fanfic constantly. I'd been creating, and posting, and sharing in all sorts of fandoms and communities pretty much continuosly since 1991.

What changed?

Well I became a professionally represented writer. I had a literary agent, I had contract deals, and I had deadlines. And don't get me wrong, I LOVE IT. It's fantastic to be able to write and share my original stories with the world.

But it meant that all of my creative brain and time was taken up with original stories instead of fanfic. And I was fine with that, I was getting to create. I wrote stories, and people reviewed them well, and my editor and my publishers adored them.

But my relationship with my literary agent began to break down pretty swiftly, and I spent a lot of time being talked over, ignored, misunderstood, and misinterpreted as a result.

I pitched a bunch of books she didn't want, and wrote a few others that she didn't understand or know how to sell. Some are still just rotting on my hard drive to this day. We parted ways in 2020. In order to query for a new agent, I began work on a novel that I've been thinking of for at least a decade.

It took me 2 years to write that book, and I've been querying it for a year. I've had over 130 rejections at this point, because it is a difficult, weird book with a tone that purposely doesn't match the themes, and it is absolutely on the too-long side of market wordcount preference.

I understood that this would be a hard slog when I decided to use a book like this to query. I knew that finding a new literary agent would not be easy, and that going out into the world with probably one of the hardest books I've ever written would not lead to a quick and easy new professional relationship.

But goddamn does it feel awful to spend half a decade being told no. It is not doing good things for my mental health or my confidence as a creator.

My beta readers love the book. But besides those three people, I have heard nothing but negative things about my writing for YEARS.

Which as you can imagine does not inspire me to sit down and try to write anything new. I probably should let this book rest. I should be putting it in a drawer and moving on to the next novel, trying to write something a little more palatable, and going out on query with that. But I just don't have the heart to create something new, AGAIN, knowing that it's probably just going to tip into that same black hole of non-response, misunderstanding or indifference that's swallowed up the last handful of projects I've worked on.

And then I thought, maybe it's time to write something for fun again.

I was struck with a cracky idea for a fanfic (though in typical J.M. Frey style I seem determined to make my readers cry) and I decided to try writing it.

Normally I would write the whole story and then post it when it was finished. But I am genuinely afraid that if I started it that way, if I didn't talk about it publicly and nobody knew I was doing it, my interest would fizzle out and my ennui about creating would take over and it abandon it. (The same way I have the last two novels I tried to start in the past few months.)

So I did the thing that I have been terrified to do since I first became a professional writer: I've started posting the fic AS I write it.

And holy crap am I inspired to continue. It's a shame that my day job is in the way because I just want to sit and write and write and write and write and write.

This hasn't happened to me in YEARS.

And it's because of you people.

It's because, for the first time and half a decade, people are saying nice things about my writing. People are responding positively to my stories. And I didn't realize how much negativity I was internalizing with the query rejections. I didn't realize how much the repeated "no"s were dragging me down.

Hopefully one day soon I'll get another literary agent and I can start hearing great things about my writing again from The Biz.

But honestly, I'm starting to think that that doesn't matter.

Right now, I am ony knees with tears in my eyes THANKING YOU.

Thank you all for reminding me why I do this: to make readers feel something, to engage readers minds and hearts, and to put good stories out into the world.

So thank you so much for letting me know you enjoy them. Thank you for helping me believe in my work again.

[littlemisshaleybug]

omg so this is really random ahahah but since homestuck ended and have been rereading a bunch of my fave fanfics from like 3 years ago and i just finished rereading 'all i need is pixie dust' and just goddamn i forgot how much i loved that fic ur writing is great and i remember reading it the new chapters day u updated n eveything and theres not point to this other than wow im nostalgic, gamtav was amazing, and your fic is gr8 and thats probs the 3rd time ive read it too dang

This ancient ask has been haunting me, I’m glad I finally found it. Anyways, if you’re still at all interested, I’ve been rewriting AINIPD on Ao3 lately! I’ve got three chapters in, with much more cohesion then the previous fic. I really appreciated how much you loved the old fic, this ask really kept the whole project in my mind for years. So, thank you!!

[grackielechuga]

I've been rereading RHS for the nth time, unsurprisingly. I have over 20 WIPs for this goddamn Webtoon istg.

But I finally finished one and posted it the other day, so it's time I yap about dragon of my dreams. Aka, my Mook x Aru emotional hurt/comfort one shot that takes place the night of the series epilogue.

This post is long af. Obligatory "Honey, you've got a big storm coming" warning.

So originally this fic was supposed to be somewhat inspired by Mitski's Abbey, specifically this section:

There is a light that I can see But only, it seems, when there's darkness in me There is a dream that I sometimes see That only appears in the dark of sleep

In the end, the only allusion I included to the song at all was this

"… he is the light she sees when the world seems even the tiniest bit dark."

And the whole aspect of them being able to meet in Aru's dreams, which was honestly one of my "Gracie wants her ship to sail, so she'll bend the rules to make it happen" ideas.

The original concept portrayed Mook as only appearing before Aru in his dragon form and remaining completely silent, only showing her his human form and speaking to her for the first time in the dream after he saves her.

I'm too greedy to let that happen, however, and wanted more of an established friendship between the two. So then came the concept of a role reversal hurt/comfort one shot which is described pretty well by the summary.

Aru's oldest friend is a dragon who comforts her in her dreams. After she escapes a potentially fatal traffic incident unharmed, however, Mook is the one who needs comforting.

Mook honestly has such a huge burden by choosing not to reincarnate with Aru. He has to wait (presumably) nineteen years of her life just for one chance to change hers. If I were in that position, I would have so many doubts and worries. What if I'm too late? What if it doesn't work?

And even though he is relieved due to his success, now he might start worrying that he's of no use to Aru anymore. He's served his purpose of protecting her, but at the cost of his happiness.

“'I thought I’d be okay with watching you grow up. And I am so, so glad I can. I’m proud of who you’ve become. But it’s never been enough. Even this, being able to see you here…'”

Aru, despite not knowing anything of their time at Reincarnation High, recognizes that his selflessness is his biggest downfall. He has given everything to protect her, leaving him with little for himself. And, if not for my dream shenanigans, he would be left with nothing but remaining a bystander.

"'... You should make a choice for yourself, even if it's selfish.'”

Then, after some realization on Aru's part that Mook did in fact save her that morning, Aru asks him,

“'Why did you decide you needed to rescue me in the first place?'”

And it leads into the self-indulgent scene where Mook manipulates Aru's dream into some critical moments within their relationship. In order, these are:

The hand kiss scene from ep. 129

The Red Eclipse Festival dance scene from ep. 85

A scene from the Trip to Hell arc from ep. 48

The two flying above the garden in ep. 120

Mook's confession scene from ep. 104

The hair clip scene from ep. 52 (this one is a lot more subtle than the others but still included)

The balcony scene from ep. 130

And yes, I have screenshots of all of them...

Listing them out is a little jarring since, at first glance, they might seem like they have little to no correlation with each other.

And there's even more self-indulgence when Aru, because she's Aru, still doesn't understand why. Mook gives his reasoning (because he loves her), effectively freaking Aru out enough for her to wake up before she can actually respond.

And my final quote:

"Love is something I can try and understand. And if you do love me, Mook… you can have all of me, if that's what you really want."

Again, I'm really happy with how this fic turned out! I miss RHS so much, and I'll definitely be releasing more fan content for this series in the (hopefully) near future. And maybe one day I'll end up adding a second part going further into this concept because I think it's cute.

For those who read the fic or make it to the end of this post, thank you and stay safe! :)

[oldfritz]

for the Fanfic Writer Ask Game: ❤️🌻💛

Thanks for sending these in, anon!

❤️ What is your favorite line that you’ve written in a fic?

I don't have one definitive favorite (at least that's published; a paragraph in the fic I should have done by this weekend would take that spot but I like to keep some intrigue between us all). I can't rank the creme de la creme so here's my favorite lines of Gil, Rod, and Erzsi

All of Intricate Rituals is Gil being delectably at his worst, but I particularly love when he threatens Antonio: '“You do that and I will kill you. I will take this very nice, very weighty candlestick right next to me and bludgeon you as many times as it takes – for all of goddamn eternity if I have to – until I feel better. And if I have to drag your broken, bleeding body back to Potsdam to guarantee that, then so be it.” He slumped back down into his seat. A lightness spread throughout his body. He managed to crack a smile with his usual ease. “Thanks, Toni. You were right, I do feel better!”'

Rod's comes from Old Habits, delivering a revelation Erzsi had coming for awhile: 'To love you is to be tortured by you, Erzsébet. I think it is the only way you know how.'

Erzsi's comes from the first chapter of Accidents of Life: '“Stop acting like a child. All of us are hypocrites. You say ethics matter to you but delight in ruling with an iron fist; Gilbert complains about this life but wants to grant it to another; and I will push aside my own doubts about both of your motivations as long as I’m gaining something in the end. What a wretched group we are.” She patted the seat beside her on the sofa, a smirk inching up the corner of her lips. “Quit complaining and sit down with your equals. The three of us, we’ve been in too deep since the day we began. This is just the next natural step.”'

🌻 How often do you read your own fics?

Very often! I enjoy the works of quite a few others writing historical fics for these three awful people and their cringefail son, but man. No one else out here is writing fics directly aimed at Ms. Suzanne Oldfritz like Ms. Suzanne Princessdi. Josh and I are currently rereading all the works in my canon in chronological order, which has been a blast!

💛 What is the most impactful lesson you’ve learned about writing?

Oof, this is a great question. I would say, personally, it's engaging with as wide a pool of media as you can. Of course, novels are your go-to and I would credit Nabokov and Wilde as being my biggest literary inspirations when it came to developing my voice. Also a lot of nonfiction because history is such a heavy backdrop in my works, I'm pulling from my academic research and squirrels I've followed in my free time. But watching film and prestige shows have been hugely important to me too. You learn a lot on constructing good dialogue from these - whether it's comedic, dramatic, or simply how different 'styles' of characters speak to each other - which can mesh well with the dialogue you've absorbed from novels. And the framing of scenes!! Cinematography teaches you which details to highlight, what to show to your audience to convey an ambience of a room, show the important details of a character's emotions. Don't describe everything, but show what is important.

[orcelito]

Casually doing all sorts of little edits to discacc chapter 1. Honestly with the level of detachment I feel to the original writing, it feels like how I'll sometimes be reading a fic & noticing mistakes or thinking about better ways things could be worded... except I can actually make those changes hdkshfjdb

Man I really did just have this original chapter 1 up for a year and a half huh. It was definitely due for some edits.

[river-bottom-nightmare]

hello - do you have any dick grayson-centric fic recs?

do i-do i have any dick grayson centric fic recs?? oh babe you have come to the riGHT PLACE. as any of my mutuals could tell you, i have so many goddamn fic recs it’s not even funny anymore. here are some of my personal top favourites:

1. And The World Came Crashing Down by @zhe-angst-diary  ~5k. a fic centered around dick’s self-sacrificial tendencies, especially for the batfam. a bit angsty, very much feels, a tad ooc, but i really did love it

2. bad signal by @prismatic-et-al 38k. the plotfic to end all plotfics. this author is one of the most brilliant dc fic authors i have ever come across, and the way they weave this dark, mysterious story is nothing short of ingenious. i was on the edge of my seat the entire time. again, brilliant.

3. Breathe In, Breathe Out by @kirazalea ~20k. this woman is one of my all time favourite writers for just some really really good stories about the batfam working through and overcoming their issues. this series is comprised of 2 fics that deal with the batfam discovering how much of an impact other people’s blatant sexualization and dehumanization of dick does to him, and how, over time and with help from his family, he picks himself up and starts to defend himself. really just a wonderful series

4. Declensions by @dustorange 13k. the best rom dick grayson fic to ever exist ever. you ever look at dc making dick romani and how they fuck up all the time and think “this could have had so much potential?” this work of art tackles that issue and creates something spectacular. each line of this fic had me screaming with joy. the robin cape symbolism? beautiful. i reread it all. the. time.

5. Don’t by @haunt-the-stars ~4k. do i have too many fics on here about dick dealing with + recovering from sexual assault and rape? probably. do i care? no. this fic takes a dive into trauma and how it can affect victims. it was absolutely heartbreaking, but also has the actual best wally + dick friendship i’ve ever read ever. seriously. if “wally west is a Good Bro” could be condensed into one fic, it would be this one. 

6. the fit of the cowl by @quillium ~4k. some people could argue dick was the best batman. other could argue the cowl only hurt dick. still others say dick could’ve been a much better batman if was better written. regardless of your opinion, you should definitely read this fic. it delves into the different reactions the batfam have to batman!dick. the family dynamics in this one were super interesting, and it’s always wonderful to read a fic about dick grayson  but from someone else’s eyes

7. Hard Truths and Other Realities by @ckbookish  ~108k. a series about dick feeling lost after being fired from robin and eventually finding his way again. featuring very very much wonderful uncle clark, and bruce isn’t an asshole, he’s just a worried dad that fucks up a lot but tries his best to make amends. also, dick bonding with jason. it basically takes you through that time period from the end of dick’s robin to him solidly affirming himself as nightwing and starting to forgive bruce. a really cool take on canon, loved this series!

8. Job Performance by @i-just-want-to-destroy ~3k. ohhhhhh dear god does this fic give me the feels. set during s1 yj, it shows what being a vigilante since the grand age of 9 does to someone, how much it hurts dick to compartmentalize, how much he doesn’t even realize it. this fic leaves you with a sense of “wow. this child. he’s really fucked up.” in a heartwrenching way.

9. a soft place to land by @bluebeauregard 3k. the best dick + tim being brothers fic i’ve ever read. people like to expand on his gradual acceptance and love of jason, people go batshit crazy over him practically parenting damian. and while i do love those, dick and tim had the best canon sibling relationship in the comics (at least, in pre52). this fic takes that and runs with it, and it’s so goddamn unique. i have literally never read this idea anywhere, so i was blown away by both the fic and the way the author wrote it. 

10. touch starved by @iwhumpyou ~4k. we’ve all seen fics where timmy’s touch starved from not receiving much affection from his parents growing up and the rest of the batfam smothers him in hugs. but what i really want is a fic where dick’s the one touchstarved because he grew up in the goddamn circus where everyone was close, but ever since he came to live with bruce, he’s been starved of the affection he used to so freely get, because his entire family is most certainly not the touchy-feely type. and for added angst, he doesn’t do anything about it because he knows his family has issues with trust/intimacy and he wants to make them as comfortable as possible. anyway apparently that fic exists and it’s this one read it and sob with me will you?

11. you gotta tip on the tightrope by Anonymous 12k. for people that don’t actually know much about comics canon and why exactly dick went undercover at spyral, this fic is absolutely wonderful. it shows the lead up of events that led to dick faking his death and leaving, and why exactly he chose to listen to bruce. (i’m using “chose” liberally here). plus, sibling bonding!! specifically with jason!

12. young volcanoes by @dottie-wan-kenobi 3k. i haven’t read this fic in a while, so i don’t remember some of the finer details, but i do remember loving it. also i have it bookmarked on ao3 with the tag “THIS!!!!!!!” so that counts for something. this fic focuses more on dick’s relationship with the titans rather than bruce or the jl, and centers around what their friendship has done for dick/how it’s helped him, and how much he loves them. a wonderful team fic. 

anyway, i hope you enjoy these babe!! these fics are all so so incredible, and i just want to give all of these amazingly talented authors one big incredible hug. 

[drabbles-mc]

Anonymous Qs: What would you say are your strengths and weaknesses as a writer? And...what fics/writers on here would you say gave you new perspectives, ideas, inspiration?

I would say that my strength definitely lies in my dialogue. I think that ever since I started writing fanfiction way back in the Before Times, that was always the case. I love it about my writing, but I think that it also has made me reliant on it, in a way, and my ability to write description has suffered because of it. I've been making a more conscious effort lately to get out of my comfort zone and try to put more description in my story. I have to get out of my own head with it, because when I do description I tend to feel like I'm rambling but I know that it doesn't have to be that way. I've also been trying to get more comfortable with having my characters make shitty decisions 😂 I know that might sound kind of weird but I really do want to get more comfortable with writing characters just making the absolute wrong moves, doing things that might make them unlikable to people, etc. Gotta get that conflict from multiple sources, you know?

I also have a really bad habit of letting myself get overwhelmed by stories, especially multichapter ones. Hence why most of them have been on unplanned hiatuses. 😅

In terms of fic writers who have inspired me, I gotta give it up first and foremost to @withmyteeth and @garbinge because these two lovely humans have talked with me about writing more than any other people on the planet and I couldn't be more thankful for that. Knowing you have people in your corner that you can talk to about whatever and they're going to be along for the ride? More valuable than I can put into words. Plus their writing slaps I go back and reread their stuff all the time amen god bless.

Other writers who have inspired me:

@lovebarefootblonde can build out worlds and characters like nobody's business. Like, I could just revel in her OC's and universes for the rest of my life and never get bored.

@ashlingnarcos is 100000% the writer that made me want to round out my description-writing skills. Every fic I've read of hers has brought me to my goddamn knees. I'm weak and in awe.

@charmingoutlaws will always get a shout-out for these types of questions because their The Other Guy Saga is something that hit me so hard and inspired me so much as a writer. There aren't words to explain it.

@imagineredwood has been someone whose writing I have looked up to since I got into the SOA/Mayans fandom and continues to be one of my fave fic writers.

@yourwonkywriter is another one who has been a real cornerstone for me in terms of writing. If I hadn't come across their fics for Nestor I truly don't think I ever would've been brave enough to try writing any myself. The amount of times I reread them to try and get just a sliver of the grasp they have on his character??? Too many to count.

@awildcur writes things and I immediately lose myself in them in the best way possible. You ever read stories that just give you that warm, cozy feeling of coming home?? Yea. That's it. I just love them all.

There are definitely more but guess who is terrible at remembering url's 😅😅

[princesssarcastia]

2021 Harry Potter Fanfic Primer

im here to point fingers at the incredible authors that have enabled my new interest in HP content.  im still conflicted and upset about it, tbh, but for now we’re leaning into the curve.  we’re getting out our shovel and finding out just how deep we can make the hole we’re in.  hand in unlovable hand my beloved <3.  anyway, these fics are wonderful, their authors are wonderful, and you should go read their stuff. if there’s a star next to it that means im losing my mind over it and always will be.

Creatively Maladjusted, by elumish on AO3, 101k  (they also have a wonderful writing advice blog on tumblr, @elumish, which I recommend following if you are a writer) 

A very excellent re-telling of harry’s first year at hogwarts if he were sorted into Slytherin, plus some more not!fic or piecemeal re-tellings of his second and part of his third year.  Harry, in this, has a slightly different trauma response to growing up with the Dursley’s.  He’s a bit quieter, and the signs are a bit more obvious to the people around him, and I enjoyed that immensely. 

Honestly, if you’re going to get sucked into something you have absolutely no business getting sucked into, elumish is the way to go, their fic is incredible. their teen wolf fic is also immaculate, if you’re so inclined. 

Dissonance, by ImpishTubist on AO3, 2.5k (@impishtubist on tumblr)

Set during fifth year.  Oblivious!Harry has always been a delightful trope when well executed, and this is well executed.  Plus, some angst between Remus and Harry over what Umbridge has been doing to him.

I would certainly recommend a lot of ImpishTubist’s other hp work on AO3, like Lacuna.

blow us all away, by rexcorvidae on AO3, 23k (@rexcorvidae on tumblr)

In progress (like, updated last week in progress).  Currently in the beginning of Harry’s first year.  Fem!Harry, Indian!Harry.  Hagrid puts Harry in touch with Remus when she has questions about her parents, and they become reluctant, traumatized, angst-ridden pen pals who keep missing each other’s true intentions like ships in the night.  hot DAMN do I love this fic.  there’s hints of the way the dursley’s treat Harry peaking through in her letters, and I appreciated the attention to “hmm, her experience as a girl of indian descent in britain under the thumb of a bunch of white people who like being Normal may not have been gucci”

Definitely comb through the rest of their HP fic, too, I may or may not have gone feral over it.

Where the Heart is, by silver_fish on AO3, 15k (@kohakhearts on tumblr)

Woof.  This one said, “hey, harry was probably SUPER depressed in the summer after fifth year.  like, clinically.  maybe someone should do something about that.”  Fuck yeah.  Then this one said, “that someone was Snape.”  You all know my opinions on Snape; generally, Bad.  But damn if this fic didn’t wholly convince me by the end of it.  I thought it was a very realistic way for Snape to start seeing Harry as a person all on his own, and not a proxy for Snape’s angst over James and Lily, respectively.  The angst is wonderful, the ending is even more so.

*bernie sanders voice* I am once again asking you to read through the rest of the author’s HP fic.  a lot of them have similar themes; there’s actually a great one with Molly that i’m not reccing here, Wonder.

☆Bindings, Bindings, by Quietlemonhush on AO3, 60k (@quietlemonhush on tumblr)

WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS TO YOU HOW MUCH I ENJOYED/AM ENJOYING THIS.  If I had to pick a single fic and say “you, it’s your fault I’m stuck here,” it would be this one.  Anyway Lily in the afterlife is So Very Angry about how Petunia is treating Harry, and how Sirius is rotting in Azkaban, and how Remus is alone, that she literally brings herself back to life and drags James and Regulus with her.  All three of them are there to chew bubblegum and fix everything that went wrong after they died—and would you look at that, they’re all out of bubblegum!  There’s only Fury left.  That inciting premise is very crack, but every moment after that is very much not crack.  Lily and James love harry more than anything, the way a child should be loved; James and Sirius have the epic friendship of a lifetime; Sirius and Remus have staggering amounts of resolved sexual tension and take turns keeping each other in check; Regulus, though he realized that Voldemort and his family were shit before he died, is still unlearning all his racist bullshit and, also, years of trauma.  Actually, they’re all traumatized, but hey: now they have one another again and not a damn one of them seems inclined to let go anytime soon.  Quietlemonhush went, “hey, HP has a lot of Awful people in it, and a lot of Righteous people in it, and many of them are Very, Very Powerful; also, love is the most powerful force in the universe” and i said “hell yes tell me more right now.”  And then they did!

Quietlemonhush writes Sirius/Remus in a way that makes it sooo much fun to devour, so the rest of their HP fic is most certainly worth a look, if that’s your thing.

Rebuilding, by Colubrina on AO3, 113k (@colubrina on tumblr)

Hermione/Draco (*shrug emojis into the abyss* yeah, yeah, like none of us have ever been there before).  Takes place during Hogwarts 8th year, and while the beginning is, IMO, a little unfair to Ron, it gets much better.  Tells the story of Hermione and Draco clearing the air, learning to like each other, having some hormones over each other, and then falling in love.  Also tells the story of Hermione and Theo Nott becoming friends; the story of how every single 7th and 8th year student is fucked to hell by the war and the Carrows; the story of how they start an emotional support group about it and all become friends; and the story of, what the hell do you do with yourself after that kind of trauma?

I’ve been dipping in and out of Colubrina’s HP since before I was even on tumblr; I actually found them in those dark yesteryears when the only fandom interactions I had were on fanfiction.net.  Of such fame as Green Girl, which is an HP fic staple, and has also written a lot of wackier, crackier, and darker things than that.  If you don’t take yourself too seriously, I highly recommend many of their big HP works, though I imagine it’ll press some people’s buttons.  Colubrina’s work really does take up a corner of my mind whenever I’m in an HP mood, and will take up yours if you let it.

☆ all waiting is long, by shuofthewind on AO3, 149k ( @shu-of-the-wind on tumblr)

This is so well written that I can’t stop thinking about it.  It is occupying my mind when I lie awake at night, you know?  It’s one of those.  Hermione messes with something she probably shouldn’t have in Grimmauld Place, so when Sirius is sent through the Veil in the Department of Mysteries, she gets thrust into an alternate universe...in 1975.  Instead of handwaving it away, shuofthewind actually gets into the mechanics of it in a way that makes sense, to emphasize that hermione is never going home.  ever. The world she finds herself is shifted slightly to the left, quite a bit darker, but in a “the author is treating the idea of a society-wide conflict over blood purity much more seriously than JKR ever did” way, not a sensationalist way.  Now, Hermione has to grapple with all her grief at losing everyone she’s ever loved or known, the moral/ethical/magical implications of sharing what she knows about her future in an alternate world, and, you know, a goddamn war with people who want to murder her for being who she is.  This Hermione is smart, and she’s kind, and she’s powerful, and she’s making real friends.  If you hate JKR’s guts I’d go read this right now, because it delivers in all the ways she failed us.  It’s plotty, its got great world-building, and it pulls back the white curtain on the wizarding world to show you that, like real life, it’s multicultural and full of queer people...and the discrimination that comes with both.

shuofthewind write epics, mainly for the MCU, and I’ve read some of them a looooong time ago, so this fic kinda seemed out of left field for me but im SOOOO GLAD it exists.  If you want MCU fic you can sink your teeth into, go for it, but alas, they do not have any more HP fic (.......yet?)

Speak Now [+] Listen Now, by mrsfrizzle on AO3, 33k altogether

Harry reaches out to Remus for support because Umbridge is getting to him with her literal torture.  Remus, being a former professor, former mandatory reporter, person who loves Harry and has since he was born, and all around good man, tells Harry he has to tell someone, or Remus will.  It’s everything any adult looking back on that time in HP canon ever wanted, which is for an actual adult to say “what the fuck, those are literal chidlren” and then do something about it.  Then, a far more dangerous task: Harry trusts Remus enough to go to him about the Dursleys.  Harry and Remus’ relationship develops SO WELL, and there’s a bit of exploration about how Sirius may not exactly be guardian material, because he did in fact spend 12 years of his life getting tortured instead of growing up.  I think I’m actually going to go reread this right now, because it speaks to my id.

they do have some other HP fic which did not appeal to my hyperspecific wants, but may appeal to some of yours.  I think they’re also a published author, there should be a link on their profile page.

chase the stars, by Duskglass on AO3, 101k (@felix-duskglass on tumblr)

When Harry is five years old, a picture of him ends up in the Daily Prophet, and Sirius Black, Terror of Ministry Officials Touring Azkaban everywhere, gets a hold of that issue.  He then, in order: breaks out of Azkaban; crosses the countryside to Surrey; Finds Harry: Kidnaps Harry; Breaks Into Remus’ Apartment; starts processing (or maybe just acknowledging) his trauma from Azkaban, the war, and his childhood; and pines after Remus.  It’s a little plotty, and deals a lot (sometimes through flashbacks) with the specific awful things that happened to Sirius—largely because, after years in the constant presence of Dementors, those are nearly literally the only memories he has left.  It’s a wonder he’s got the strength to love Harry and Remus at all.  But then, maybe it isn’t.

This is a Very Serious Fic, but the rest of Duskglass’s HP work is actually just cracky enough to tickle your funny-bone, while still making you think “okay but why couldn’t we have done that in the first place.”

So!  That’s it for recs, for now.  These are all things I’ve found and read in the last month; if any of y’all are interested in my old HP recs, let me know and I can make a post for that, too.  While I’m still very conflicted about my choice of current fandom, I am not in ANY way conflicted about my taste in fic and authors.  Send these guys some love, read their fic if you’re so inclined, and leave some nice comments at the end of it.

[howdoyousleep3]

Miss K, I was just rereading your Senator Daddy Rogers fics for the 634th time and they are a delight as always. I LOVE Stern Daddy Senator 😍 And sweet little bb intern Bucky is always waiting on hand and foot to please Daddy. I just can’t get enough of them!

Anyway, I was thinking— in the spirit of the holidays, do you think Senator Rogers hosts christmas parties in his office for all his staff? Maybe he treats them all with early christmas presents (including the interns 😉) and maybe, just maybe, Daddy asks Bucky to meet him in the bathroom for some *ahem* sexy times?

I don’t know what’s gotten into me but I was just so excited and I couldn’t help myself 😂 Love you, Miss K and all your work especially Senator Daddy 😍😍😍

God yes hell yes what a nummy thought! I have many thoughts running through my head about how this would go down but the one I keep coming back to is mainly because Senator Daddy Rogers is a bit of a smug asshole.

It’s a big party, not just Senator Rogers’ group of interns but a few other representatives’ as well. It starts early, goes well into the night, drinks flowing, presents given, a bit rambunctious but overall a damn good time. Bucky can’t stop watching the way Steve saunters around like he fucking owns this place, clapping people on the shoulder, drinking people half his age under the table, boisterous laugh more than contagious.

He can’t stop thinking about the fact that that man chooses Bucky to get off with, to use, to fuck. That man lets Bucky call him “Daddy”. Bucky’s cheeks are flushed and his eyes are half-lidded because of his spiked eggnog but also because he’s walking around on this thunderous cloud of arousal.

And Steve is no better off, goddamn.

He can’t stop watching the way Bucky slinks around from person to person, can’t stop this little bubble of what he’s quite certain is pride from rising up in his chest at seeing the way Bucky works the room. He can’t stop watching Bucky’s mouth move, the way it’s slick and red and reminds Steve of cherries. He can’t stop thinking about all the ways he’s seen that mouth work, open and wide and trembling.

Senator Rogers may need to cut back on his whiskey-drenched eggnog when his mind slips to all the ways he’s been inside of Bucky’s body.

Surely they won’t be missed if they slip off for a few minutes…

“Why can’t I keep my eyes off’a you tonight, huh? Is it all this whiskey or has it been that long since I’ve had you under me?” the Senator chides hot and heavy against Bucky’s mouth as he presses the intern against the back of his office door, hands pulling at Bucky’s tucked shirt. He hums into Bucky’s cheek, his jaw, when his hands reach skin, so warm, so soft.

“Off’a me? Can’t fucking think around you,” Bucky mumbles into the Senator’s neck, turning and nipping at his bearded chin when the Senator’s grip goes a bit tight on Bucky’s sides.

Lot’s of kisses, warm ones, hot ones, a bit giggly, a bit intense, but what’s new? Pushes and pulls, groans and chuckles, “no marks…” and “I’ll do whatever I want with you and you’ll say ‘thank you, Daddy’…”. By the time the back of the Senator’s knees come in contact with his desk he’s got a squirmy and panting Bucky in his arms who is ready to do anything Steve wants.

How sweet.

Steve can barely pull Bucky off of him, doesn’t want to, could suck on those cherry-red lips all night. It takes a fistful of hair, takes a low, “Got a present for you, boy…” to get Bucky’s attention, to get him to pump the brakes. His eyes are curious, are hopeful, half-lidded as Steve reaches for his belt buckle.

“Tell me you’re not giving me your dick for Christmas…” Bucky whispers, fingers digging into the skin of the Senator’s stomach through the open buttons he’s fought through up to this point. Steve can’t help but chuckle through a smile, kisses at the corner of Bucky’s open mouth.

“You really gonna act like this isn’t the best present you’ll receive all season, you fuckin’ brat?”

He’s got Bucky there, caught him in a bit of dramatic bratty flair. He would do whatever the Senator wanted him to, would take a sort of filthy pride in the fact that Steve Rogers once again has chosen him to do such a thing with.

“Besides,” Steve breathes, lowers his voice on Bucky’s lips as if what he’s about to say is a secret. “My gift to you isn’t just Daddy’s cock—” Bucky is drunk and is feeling slutty and can’t help but drop his eyes down to watch the Senator pull his cock from his pants as he talks.

“It’s the gift of you doing whatever it is you want with Daddy’s cock…”

And that’s nice, oh god that makes Bucky’s chest clench up, makes his dick go a bit achy. He hates himself just a tad when his hand reaches down, fingers encircling the Senator’s cock, both humming when Bucky tugs on his handful. Bucky swallows heavily.

“Now? I get my… my present now?”

“A’course you fuckin’ do, you kiddin’ me?” The Senator huffs with a tight tap on Bucky’s cheek, a grip on his chin. “This is my Christmas present to myself too, sugar…”

Bucky can’t think straight. He’s got Senator Rogers leaning back against his own desk, hand full of the older man’s cock, stance wide and open. Whatever he wants. His hand fists at Steve’s cock again, glancing down and watching his fingers work and dance. When the Senator sighs heavily, Bucky whimpers, drunkenly says, “Want it all…” to which Steve gives him a rumbly reply of, “Then take it all, Buck.”

And happy holidays, Bucky does. He drops to his knees right there, lets himself have this moment of full and total control. He takes his own time, lets himself get lost in the feeling of the Senator’s cock stretching out his lips, his jaw, the way it feels sliding against his tongue. He lets himself go slow, allows himself to get openly and enthusiastically lost in a mouth full of balls. Even when Steve reaches for Bucky’s head, grip a familiar and taut one, he snaps, pulls his head back and clicks his tongue.

“You keep your hands to yourself,” and oh that feels nice, being the one to give an order for a change. It makes a grin spread across his face before he sucking down Steve’s fat cock once more, not even bothering to wipe the drool off his chin.

Bucky rides this powerful high into the “open me up, gonna ride your cock,”, into the command of, “lay down, on your desk…”

Bucky might be drunk but he thinks Senator Rogers might like it when Bucky is in charge. He hollers a bit too loud, smacks Bucky’s ass a little harder than normal, squeezes at it as he rides Steve through his fucking desk. He bounces on that cock like a little bunny, like he owns it, even at one point slides one of the hands on Steve’s chest up to loosely circle the older’s throat in warning.

He chuckles and purrs when Bucky tells him he can’t come yet, “… not done with your cock yet, Daddy. Stay put.”

Being in-control for once is something that Bucky didn’t think he’d like as much as he does. He tells Steve what to do, where to grab, when to touch. He asks him naughty questions, asks Daddy what his pussy feels like on the inside, asks Daddy how he wants to come and then drags their fuck out even more before not letting Daddy come the way he wants. It’s thrilling, it’s erotic, and by the time they’ve both come, he’s sweating and sated and knows there is no way in hell he’s going to walk out of this office looking anything but well-fucked.

In the end, Senator Rogers was right—this was the best present he receives all season...

Honeybun, thank you for this! I haven’t written a bit of them in a while and how fun, eep. Lub you!

[ultimatebethylficlist]

Veteran Author of The Month: June 2021

The featured veteran author for June is also a co-admin right here at UBFL: SquishyCool (or @im-immortal )!

SquishyCool can be found on AO3 and FFN under the same penname.

When asked what got her into Bethyl and what the fandom means to her, she said:

I’ve been a hardcore TWD fan since the show began airing, but that’s because of my love for zombies. In all honesty, I didn’t really ship anyone for the first 3-4 seasons. I kind of shipped Daryl with Carol, but then it became clear that it was a platonic relationship and in all honesty, I just wanted to see them both get some action lmao. Then the prison fell... and in those first moments of “Still,” when we see Beth and Daryl running and running and finally collapsing on the ground, breathless and exhausted... the butterflies started. Something clicked and I immediately thought, “uh oh.” The rest is history, especially considering how “Still” and “Alone” played out. I can’t explain how or why I’m still so heavily invested, especially considering my last 2 fandoms only kept my attention for about 2-3 years each, but here I am. And I love it! I am so incredibly grateful for the Bethyl fandom because not only has it helped me improve my writing so much more than I ever could have imagined, but it has also introduced me to some of the most amazing people, including someone who I now consider one of my very best friends! It’s my happy place :)

For her personal fic rec list, she recommends:

In The Maw by ronsparkyspeirs

Way Down We Go by LeathernLaces

Surfacing by lindentree

Wild Things (The Moonshine Poet) by Abelina

The Gift by Feliz

The Man Who Can't Be Moved by burningupasun

New Experiences Series by wallflow3r

Whisper Softly to Me by taylorcatherine

Interstice by leftmywingshome

To Love Like a Man by Seraphique

Death, Death (i defy thee) by alamorn

In My Blood by Courtneyshortney82

Let the Good Times Roll by gutsforgarters

Resolved by Allatariel

the weight of these wings by peachthorns

all my spaces are filled with you by annabeth_writes

A Little Jailbreak with the Little Jailbait by wandering_gypsy_feet

between the beginning and the end by sheriffandsteel

SquishyCool’s Works & Personal Thoughts:

Dirty Fingernails and Dried Blood Summary: What happened during the months between "Still" and "Alone"? Beth uses the last pages of her diary to write down every detail of surviving with Daryl. Thoughts: My first Bethyl fanfic. It holds a special place in my heart for that reason, though it is pretty rough. If I could go back, I never would’ve done it entirely in first-person. But I do plan to finish it one day. There are some scenes I’m particularly proud of, and I still have a long note full of ideas and plot points.

Most Wanted Summary: After Beth’s mother and half-brother are murdered in a drug war, the godly veil on the Greene Family operation is lifted, and law enforcement comes down hard. In an effort to protect her family, Beth commits a heinous crime that could mean life in prison alongside them. Now everyone she’s ever trusted is in police custody and her only chance at freedom is to get as far away from Atlanta as she can... Thoughts: Well, this is a must-read if you like my writing. I hope to one day convert this into an original fiction and maybe get it published, but I need to finish it first LOL. I got the idea from ONE scene of “Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt,” and from there, it exploded into a huge mystery thriller (with lots of romance and smut). I’m really really proud of it, and I’m scared I’ll fuck it up tbh, so I keep putting off continuing it. But I really need to get back to it because I really want people to see what I have planned! (Also, this fic is the reason @courtneyshortney82​ started talking to me, so that alone is pretty historic lmao)

The Crow’s Song Summary: Beth and Daryl spend a few more days together in the funeral home and come to terms with all they've lost along the way. But soon, they must decide what comes next. Thoughts: This fic... this fucking fic. It took me a full year to write. I made numerous edits. I even got a little depressed while I was writing the last two chapters, and my bf didn’t know why until he read what I’d been writing lol. It’s honestly the Bethyl fic I’ve always wanted to write but just didn’t know how. I’m still really really proud of how it turned out.

Carnival Games Summary: Daryl is a traveling carnival worker and Beth is a barely legal farmer's daughter looking for a night of fun when the carnival comes to town. Thoughts: Omg this fic is so fun!! One of my first Bethyl fics, and one of my first Bethyl smut fics. Short, sweet, a little funny, and a lot hot. I am still impressed with myself on this one, especially considering how much my writing has improved since lol

Breathe. Please. Summary: Beth shows up at the Hilltop. Alive. Daryl can hardly believe his eyes. Until she's lying in his bed, an arm's reach away. And he can hear her inhaling... exhaling... inhaling... Thoughts: Another “fix-it” that I’m proud of. Tbh I didn’t think it was anything all that special, but a lot of readers have said it’s one of their favorites, and some say they reread it regularly, and nothing makes me happier than hearing that, so I am extremely proud.

picking @ scabs Summary: Sometimes, no matter how much you love someone, being with them just isn't right. But what wouldn't you give for it to be right? Can someone like Daryl learn how to swallow his pride and stop repeating the same mistakes over and over? Can someone like Beth learn to fight off her demons and allow him to get close enough to hurt her again? How can they stay away from each other when it's all too easy to fall back into one another? Picking a scab will leave a scar, but they both have so many scars already... what's a few more? Thoughts: This fic is very, very personal for me. It’s like my “therapy” fic. I have poured some of my deepest feelings and struggles into its chapters, and the whole idea that got me to start it was that I wanted to find a way to navigate and cope with ending my 3-year long relationship with my emotionally/mentally/sometimes physically abusive ex. I still have a lot of fond memories from that relationship, but even more so, I have painful memories. Not to mention, going through your early 20s as a woman in the modern day is a fuckin’ trip, so this kind of explores that. It’s really self-indulgent, I think, but I’m really proud of the smut in it. And more than that, I’m proud of the response. I’ve had a few people message me or comment to say that they’ve felt all those things, or have experienced similar things, and it’s really just... relieving. I put my heart and soul out there, and what I got back was “you’re not alone.” So yeah, this fic is special. I wanna finish it soon, but I have to be in A Mood to do so. 

In Toto Corde Summary: Despite a million reasons not to, Beth and Daryl fell in love. Then he made the ultimate sacrifice in order to keep all of his promises. Now, facing unimaginable consequences at the hands of witch hunters, Beth has no choice but to use her powers to bring Daryl back from the dead. "He won't be the same..." Thoughts: I LOVE THIS FIC. I love it so much that I had to rewrite it after like 4 or 5 years. And I already started on a sequel that I really hope I’m able to finish. Though it doesn’t have many hits, and I don’t think many people have read it at all, which I understand since it basically is entirely focused around Daryl being killed. But damn, I’m proud of this one, and it was really fucking fun to write because witch!Beth is just... the best.

risk it all (part 1 of in for a penny, in for a pound) Summary: Daryl Dixon has a pretty decent life, all things considered. He's got his own place. A good dog. A few friends. Even a girlfriend. He keeps himself out of trouble. Until he starts texting Beth Greene. And hell, if he ain't about to risk it all for this damn girl. Thoughts: This was supposed to be one short multichapter fic focused entirely on smut and social media. Then I got on a roll and it ended up being the beginning of a series! This fic is purely fun. Nothing too serious or heavy. I write it when I’m in a Good Mood because it’s my little happy place. I have plans for about 4 more fics before the series will be finished!

Don’t Make Me Haunt You Summary: So here's the thing: Merle Dixon is dead as fuck. And as it turns out, Beth Greene is the only one who can see or hear him. Which is weird considering she's never met or even heard of this guy, let alone anyone with the last name Dixon. That's her first problem... Thoughts: The reception to this fic has absolutely blown me away. I had no idea anyone would want to read about ghost!Merle haunting Beth and forcing her to solve his murder with the help of his grumpy brother. And it was all inspired by an episode of South Park lmao then I started really getting into it and now it’s just like, my super fun fic where I explore a range of emotions and all kinds of religious beliefs and different mythologies and I can build the world however I want and goddamn I just love writing this fic. Plus there’s a podfic for it! I can’t even begin to explain how much I love this fic and how proud I am of it :)

[ohheyitsokay]

congrats you angel, you deserve all the love and praise for your writing bc holy shit you’re so talented!!! for the soulmate au celebration, i’m thinking either javi or jack (your choice bc i can’t choose) with the soulmate goose of enforcement au 💕 ik it’s a bizarre au but the potential for chaos is insane 😂 anyways ily and i hope you’re having a great day honey

...not me, having JUST reread your javi/jack fic, considering both... definitely me

Anyway, thank you, jj, you absolute gem of a human. I swear I had to turn up the fan reading this I got so flustered. I hope you have a great day too! And I hope you enjoy- I had to do a little research, and made it shorter than I wanted to, so hopefully it fills your chaos cup still!  (You'll understand, and hopefully forgive my delay when you see what's under the cut :) )

wordcount: 2.5k

warnings: strong language, lil angst with happy endings all around. mild menace meeting menace shenanigans 

Okay this is written as pt 1 Jav, pt 1 Jack, pt 2 Jav, pt 2 Jack, bonus pt 3. If you’re only in it for one of the boys, it makes reading a bit weird, but I liked the format for the whole thing. Sorry!

>>

Javier wanted to hit it with a bat. Or a car. Or anything. All that mattered is that maybe then it would leave him the fuck alone. Of all the stupid, infuriating, ridiculous guides the universe could have given him to find his other half, he was sure this was the worst. Rumor was, he couldn't even kill it if he tried.

It's not that he didn't want to find his soulmate, but he... well, he didn't want to find his soulmate.

There were all sorts of excuses to spout - work, obviously a priority, inconvenience, not wanting to give up his way of life. Not to mention following a damn goose was an impossible task, plus the fact that the stupid thing didn't even like him.

It would appear seemingly at random, honking insistently or flapping erratically, and then be gone before anyone else could bat an eye. To say that he had become increasingly irritated would have been a huge understatement.

The truth of it was that Javier was afraid. No one in the world liked to feel like they were being controlled. People liked to know what was going on, and this just didn't fit the bill. He didn't like that he didn't know you, couldn't be chosen, by you.

His life was already complicated enough - messy enough - that a soulmate would only make it worse. He had made it this long, this far without needing one, so he was fine without, thank you very much. Even to himself, his lie sounded okay.

It was hard to face, the idea that there was someone out there, a relationship that he couldn't have control over. And someone who would love him unconditionally? Terrifying.

Unfortunately, he wasn’t allowed to do nothing, because it seemed like every direction he turned there was a goose from hell wreaking havoc on his life.

They had reached an impasse - glowering at each other as it had planted itself in front of his door. Little feet pacing angrily, unreasonably long neck, all of it was just begging to be kicked. Except, for all he was a seasoned DEA agent, Javier was almost afraid the thing could go a few rounds with him. Feet shuffling uneasily, his hand twitched for his gun, even though he knew he couldn’t, wouldn’t shoot.

It was stupid to have a staring contest with a goose. And even more stupid that the goose won .

Javier turned away, spitting spanish curses in a stream that would make his mama smack him. Maybe it wasn't too late to find a hookup he could use to crash, he was thinking, and that thought was apparently the final straw. The goose reappeared in front of him.

Hissing.

More curses, a quick turn on his heel. This time, it didn't move in front of him, it left a sharp peck on his calf, before dodging his kick.

It was herding him, against his will, to you.

-

When he saw the goose, Jack thought he was delirious. The Statesman lab must've screwed something up because he'd seen that horrible, wonderful, stupid goose once before, in another life.

And he never, ever thought he'd see it again.

He did a lot of thinking, that night and the next day and the next. Strangely, he did a lot of feeling, too, noticing how light his shoulders felt, how kind the ache on his heart had become. He visited their grave, pressed his forehead to the headstone, and breathed some deep breaths.

And when he saw the goose again, he lassoed it.

It wouldn't have died even if it was powered up, but he didn't take the chance, determination and longing filling his being like blood, pumping through his heart to each and every part of him.

Miracle of miracles, it let him, with all the glare a bird could give. Knees only making small pops, Jack settled on his heels, looking at it sternly.

"Can you take me to them?"

The expression on it's tiny, smug face didn't change, but it also didn't disappear to free itself, so he waited.

And he waited. And waited. And eventually, watching it with half an eye, he grabbed a doughnut and offered it to the stupid soulmate goose god.

It considered the doughnut, pecked it as Jack yanked his fingers out of reach, and apparently accepted. After it was finished, it began to tug him along, waddling on its makeshift leash as Jack's heart leapt into his throat. He grabbed the bag of doughnuts and his hat before getting dragged along, to you.

-

At his very core, Javier was a man driven by his personal sense of justice. Being herded by an immortal goose of mischief was unfair, it made no sense that he had to find you, somehow needed more, and wasn't allowed to choose. It pecked and honked and bullied him all the way to a crowded bar, which was a perfect example. 

Just as he was thinking, trying to convince himself he would've come here on his own, it disappeared again and he sighed.

He needed a drink. And, he needed to make some of his own goddamn decisions. Defiance and determination, he told himself. Not stubbornness. There was nothing to prove, it was just defiance and determination, to take his fate into his own hands and make his own choices. And if he was going to do that, he wanted to look for someone who wasn't an informant or a one night stand. His gut was looking for someone he could pull to his side and to show the universe that the goose was right to give up on him.

You were a perfect fit. Slightly disgruntled for whatever reason, even through the crowd he could see the faint, telltale wrinkles of someone just as... determined as he was. Shoulders held the same defiance he was so proud of, and he would be lying if he wasn't physically drawn to you as well. The inconsistent lighting could make anyone look good if you wanted it enough, but you... were something else.

There was a line of pink neon reflection from the top of your ear, across your cheekbone, and just grazing the line of your upper lip as you looked thoughtfully at something he couldn't see. Javier thought he wouldn't mind tracing that path with his fingers, and then maybe his own mouth, and his feet were already carrying him to you to look for an open door. The rest of your form came into view, and Javier noticed the bass of the music was turned up a little bit more than necessary- he could feel it thumping in his bones.

Talking to you went smoother than maybe it ever had before. You seemed resigned, at first, which was a reaction that caught him off guard, and that combined with the weariness of his week, making him unusually candid. In turn, you opened up to him like a flower turning towards the sun, fun and thoughtful and refreshing. 

He liked the way you laughed when his lines came out a little awkwardly - open and appreciative, and it made his chest puff out a little. He liked the way you spoke, too. There was kindness and romance in your soul, just whispering at the edges of the words, and while he didn’t pick up on that, per se, they made him feel special, handsome, worthy, but also trusted and comfortable and safe. Neither of you noticed at first, that you had shuffled into a quiet corner of the bar, that his body had moved close, a gentle shield boxing the two of you into your own little world.

When the question came - what brought you here, anyway? - he found himself answering honestly about half being led by his guide, then wanting to make his own path. His confidence faltered at your quiet laugh. His heart ached. A glance at the clock told him it had been two hours since he'd found you, and already he wanted to... choose you. To have you choose him.

He felt stupid that he had confessed so soon, but...

Oh, you were kissing him. There were hands shooting off sparks into his soul against his chest and his jaw and you were kissing him. Javier kissed you back.

When you pulled away, his mouth chased yours, not ready to give up the contact so soon, but you stopped him, laughing again.

"I have a confession," you whispered, and he paused.

“My guide led me here, too. I thought when it gave up on me when I saw you,” your next kiss was more chaste, “I think we got tricked.” Noticing he liked the feel of you in his arms, even if he didn’t remember pulling you there, he tightened his hold.

Javier felt light, understanding your laughter, and blissfully unafraid. “No,” he said, knowing already you’d understand him. 

“I chose you.” 

- 

Jack was running out of doughnuts. It was easier, safer to have the dumb bird half hog-tied, but he still didn’t feel any closer to you, just halfway across town. He dug in his boots and sunk onto a bench, yanking the goose to a stop, too annoyed to beg for a break. 

He wasn’t giving up and running away, absolutely not, he was just... running out of options. Or, doughnuts. And breath. If this pace kept up, he wouldn’t be able to tell you all the things he had planned out in his head. 

Eyelids closing against the southern sun, he let out a long, slow sigh. His heart was still racing, and he wondered if he was really as ready as he wanted to be, to meet his next soulmate. A sturdier inhale grounded him. He was ready, he knew he was. Whoever you were, you had to have the patience of a saint - it would be alright, he just needed a breath. The ground under his boots was sturdy, the breeze over his skin cooling, and the goose was mercifully quiet. 

“That’s one strange lookin dog you have there, cowboy,” The voice was teasing, but not malicious, and he grinned, eyes still closed. 

“She’s a purebred,” he replied, and he heard a huff of laughter like the first few notes of music. Waiting for your footsteps to carry you away, he savored the moment, feeling silly as he hoped his soulmate would like to laugh as much as he did. 

There was a weight on the other side of the bench, and he wondered at it, as you said, “Want to talk about it?” His smile was softer, this time, intrigued by the moment, but not wanting to be tempted into flirting, not when his soulmate was on the horizon. 

“Nothin to tell,” he replied, feeling suddenly strange. Jack opened his eyes, looking at the rope in his hands, feeling the fibers run through his fingers. “Just a free range chicken... taking a break from tryin to chase down my second soulmate.” He winced, definitely not wanting to look at you, after the second had slipped out. 

It wasn’t judging, though, the voice that said, “You seem like you want to talk about it.”

For once in his life, Jack didn’t know what to say, slipping off his hat to run his fingers through his hair before replacing it. He heard your half-laugh again, and it felt refreshing, like sweet tea on a southern summer day. 

“Okay,” you said, and he heard amusement this time, like you had something to say, some thought you were chewing on. 

Then, there was that terrible honk of the goose, not from his feet, but from where, assumedly, you were. Snapping his gaze to the other side of his bench, he saw a sight for sore eyes, half backlit, glowing like something he never thought he’d see.

There was an indignant goose in a cage at your ankles, now making grumbling bird noises in indignant conversation with the one at the end of his lasso. 

“I thought you were never gonna look at me,” Your arm was across the back of the bench as you grinned at dynamite smile at him. 

Jack returned it, feeling bashful and eager, dropping the rope to grab your closest hand. 

“I promise I aint making that mistake again, sugar.”

-

bonus ending:

Jack was clinging to your hand, grinning like a fool as you introduced yourselves, when another movement caught his eye. There was a man, walking up behind you, a resigned look on his face. Whiskey’s hackles should have been all the way up, yanking you into his arms at the way this man was approaching you, but instead he was dumbfounded for the second time that day. 

He was backlit, too, with shoulders that carried as much weight as the man in his mirror every morning, and he could see the shape of a gun as he knelt next to his soulmate. The stranger’s eyes when they looked at you... were as adoring as he was sure his must have been, a moment before, and he was familiar with you, like you’d known each other before now. Jack wanted to swallow, but his heart felt like it was in his throat, beating like he’d gone a round with a bull at the rodeo.

“This is probably a lot,” Javier said, taking you other hand and quirking an eyebrow. The geese made some loud, obnoxious noises and he looked at them appreciatively. “I wish I had thought of that,” he gestured at the lasso, and you smiled at him. 

“This is Javier,” you said, and you let go of them both to stand up and brush yourself off. Warm hands and strong grips were exchanged, and you watched them curiously as they shook, murmuring names and titles again. They were sizing each other up, certainly, but you felt a rush of relief as you saw a familiar spark of attraction in Javi’s eyes. 

“You got any more surprises for us, then?” you looked up at the cowboy, confused, only to realize he wasn’t talking to you. The goose in your cage was free halfway down the walk, the one in the lasso hissed. The poor man had been an RV in an earthquake and come out the other side overwhelmed and happy, of all things, but there wasn’t much more he could handle. To your surprise, he grabbed a crumbled paper bag and tossed the contents to the bird, before it gave a final honk, and waddled after it’s friend. 

“I guess that’s a no,” you said, suddenly shy at the fullness in your heart. 

“That’s alright,” Jack picked up his lasso, before looking at you and Javier, his eyes happy, and glinting with something stronger. “I think this is more than enough.”

And you agreed.

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