#just musing you know

[wander-wren]

i just came to the realization that i can’t play video games by myself.

no, that’s not the realization. i knew that already.

i can’t play video games by myself because i have siblings.

three of them, a set of twins and a stepsister less than a year older than them. they’re all ~3 years younger than me, so of course when i’m 10, 11, 12 and they’re getting their first tablets and starting to play mobile games, they’re sticking together and i don’t have shit to do but play with them. and our big one was minecraft, obviously, but we also played a ton of single-player games just…in the same room, commentating. complaining when we lost a level, sharing strategies and shit.

my sisters and i aren’t close, i don’t think. we’re very different people, even if we’re similar in a few specific ways. different interests, friends, a bigger world beyond our house. jobs and college and a propensity for fighting.

they still play hay day together. i don’t, since i’ve been away at school, and even now that i’m not it feels wrong to insert myself. i still have it on my phone, though, and occasionally one of my sisters asks if i have cookies.

sometimes i redownload old mobile games that are kind of shit, either because they got abandoned in 2015 or they’ve gotten so overrun with ads and pay-to-play there’s practically no game at all. the nostalgia is fun for a little bit, but i never keep them long.

i just cant play games by myself. i don’t have anyone to talk to.

[tofixtheshadows]

You guys really need to stop and consider the ways you're talking about Kabru I am dead fucking serious. Like I know that flattening characters is just what fandom does to a certain extent, but Kabru's actual personality is getting lost to the fandom hivemind insisting that he's aggressive/cruel/sociopathic/hateful, and these are particularly concerning takes to see leveled at the only brown character in the main cast day after day. "My poor sweet golden child Laios needs to be protected from this scary brown man" is not a good look! Like, it's very telling that the bulk of the hate and bad faith readings are reserved for Toshiro and Kabru. Everyone else's flaws get to be discussed and validated and forgiven (or erased), meanwhile people are straight making up things to be mad about with Toshiro and Kabru but patting themselves on the back for being smart.

The worst part is how undeserved it all is. I'm trying to lay off anime-onlys because we're still kind of in the red herring stage of getting to know Kabru, but I would still like to gently suggest that even if you think Kabru is up to something, you don't gave to get in the tags of every fan creator's post and bring up how you hate him or You Can Tell he's totally evil. Sometimes I think Kabru's blue eyes give people license to say things about his appearance that they know would sound completely racist otherwise, but referring to his blue eyes acts as a get-out-of-racism free card. The jokes about the dog with brown contacts are getting old, by the way.

For people who have read the manga, it's disappointing. Kabru is one of the most complex and important characters in the story, and if you base your interpretation of him and all your fandom interactions on shallow first impressions you are completely missing out.

I know part of this is because Dungeon Meshi is a comedy, but the story also wants to be taken seriously. For example, it's admittedly really funny when Chilchuck calls Laios "sick in the head", but that doesn't change the fact that the way Chilchuck casually belittles Laios caused him to hide the fact that he was "hallucinating" from his friends for weeks. Those feelings matter.

Like, this

is funny.

But this?

Is not. This is just a very clear example of a brown boy with PTSD. As someone else with PTSD, just looking at this fucking sucks, man.

The only reason why Kabru thinks about killing Laios is because he is in the middle of a flashback. He's struggling through a panic attack. If he truly wanted to kill Laios because he's violent or because he finds Laios inherently annoying, he wouldn't otherwise talk with Laios normally. Notice how he doesn't act this way at any other point in the story- it's just because he's triggered by monsters. Even when he's thinking about his plans to "deal with" Laios later, he's reluctant to actually kill him and only considers it to prevent another tragedy. Despite his deadly skills, Kabru relies far more on "soft" power- insight, persuasion, diplomacy. He's a rare example of a character who absolutely is, or at least can be, manipulative, but seems to use his abilities for good. He's not a pathological liar, he isn't looking down on everyone behind a smile. He's someone who is extremely emotionally intelligent, and he's willing to put aside all his own basic wants and needs to stop the cycle of dungeons devouring humans.

I'm going to cut a potential thesis on his character short and just give some examples of things that fandom should consider about his personality more:

Racism in fandom isn't just about whitewashing in fan art, or using racial slurs. The insidiousness of bad faith readings, reductions to racist tropes, lack of fan content for characters of color, and dismissal of a character's complexity are far more common. You can believe yourself to be completely neutral or even positive about a character and still churn out low-grade bile about them into fandom's collective unconscious. Fandom reflects real life.

And I have been around fandom long enough to see how these behaviors (mostly from my fellow white fans) affect fans of color, how it makes a fandom feel hostile and unwelcome to them. It's fun to make jokes and memes, I'm absolutely not saying that everything needs to be a deeply nuanced take, but we need to be careful that it doesn't veer into toxicity. Please think about how our contributions to fandom come across, and what sort of vibes they cultivate in this communal space.

[madamemiz]

sad: falling out of a hyperfixation

tragic: watching your beloved friends and mutuals fall out of the hyperfixation while you're still in it

[paxcallow]

desire to draw raz's hair unhatted and uncombed spiraled into imagining an extended gag about some emergency situation forcing all of the psychonauts out of the motherlobe into the quarry in their jammies at like 2 am and judging each other's clothing choices instead of getting actual work done.

[home-of-renn]

AU where Danny never tells Sam and Tucker about the portal accident but they eventually put together the pieces after Danny starts acting hella weird. Especially around his parents.

They eventually figure it out but can't seem to decide whether their friend is actually dead or if there's something else going on. They inadvertently become ghost experts while playing detective, while also simultaneously trying their best to help Danny from the shadows without him finding out that they found out.

Bonus points if they have to fend off Jazz with a stick cause she knows something's up and she knows that Sam and Tucker know but Sam and Tucker keep covering their tracks and doing their best to throw her off the scent.

Bonus, bonus points if Jazz knows that there's something very messed up going on and desperately wants to know what happened to her brother but Sam and Tucker think she's on her parent's side and are convinced that she'll just report back to them if she ever finds out.

Bonus, bonus, bonus points! if Jazz just has this deep, gut-wrenching feeling that she can't tell her parents about her suspicions and that there's something increasingly disturbing about both her parents and Danny's behaviour as well as how the three of them interact after the portal got turned on. She does her best to keep her parent's attention off of Danny, which kinda helps but also inadvertently gets in the way of Sam and Tucker's helping.

Bonus, bonus, bonus, bonus points!!!!! if Maddie and Jack have acquired some very mild ecto contamination from being in such close proximity with the portal on a daily basis and their continued exposure is making them slowly exhibit Obsession-like behaviours about their work and research, which consequentially results in their attitudes/behaviours becoming increasingly more disturbing and concerning from an outside perspective.

[helixcraft]

the fish that keeps appearing all over my recommended only that he's out of jail and happy

[laughhardrunfastbekindsblog]

We talk a lot about how traumatized Crosshair is, how much he has been through, what he's had to overcome, and how much our man needs ALL the TLC and hugs and comfort and therapy (and boy oh boy he does!)...

But Hunter strikes me as the kind of person who is equally traumatized and scarred for life (just in different ways) but keeps it buried deep because he's supposed to be the leader and he WILL stay strong, he is fully aware Wrecker spent months barely holding him back from careening off the edge of the cliff and so he's going to work even harder to hold himself together now because Wrecker shouldn't have borne that responsibility, he's going to be there to hug Omega when she sobs from the nightmares and comfort Crosshair when he wakes up in a cold sweat clutching at the hand that's no longer there and convince Wrecker to take a break when he starts to wheeze while walking up the path to the Archium or gets that far-off look in his eyes as he stares at the mangled breastplate hanging up in his room...

He's going to do all this, and he's going to stay acutely aware of all their struggles and will help them through all of it, and he might quietly admit to having a bad dream when Omega talks about it, but he's never, ever, EVER going to tell anyone that he quietly goes to his room to hide his panic attacks and how hard it is to let Omega out of his sight and how difficult it is for him to convince his brothers to go out and try some new hobbies because he is so afraid they're going to get hurt but he can't tell them that and how his throat still feels like it's closing up every time he looks at his siblings and notices the one who isn't there and never will be again...

And the thing is, Omega and Wrecker and Crosshair know how much Hunter is struggling, but they don't know exactly how to help him because he keeps saying he's fine, and he's going to keep saying it because he's the older brother and he's supposed to take care of them and he failed at it so many times and he's NOT going to fail now...

But they keep at it, Omega insists that they all have a "camp out" in the living room all together at least once a week (Hunter doesn't have nightmares then) and Wrecker makes Hunter come with him to try a bunch of new hobbies until Hunter's discovered six new interests and Crosshair who has finally forced himself to go to the memorial at the Archium now somehow manages to drag Hunter along with him every few days and they sit together and remember their brother (until said brother finally comes home, of course)...

And by the time Rex contacts Hunter to let him know the vault kids' families have been found and asks for help getting them all relocated to safety, Hunter watches his family gear up to go, and he realizes... not only are they okay, but he's okay, too.

[littlecrow4]

Two versions cause I couldn’t decide a skin tone

This took 5 fucking hours

And it’s bills fault lmao that suit took forever

Captions

Bill: Ha-Ha Don’t get to excited Sixer!!

Ford wraps his tail around his leg for comfort

[junkmailmusubi]

see i keep noticing this "rule" in a lot of fandom spaces that lighthearted fandoms tend to write edgy stuff abt the characters Going Through It and dark fandoms tend to write a lot of fluff. this makes the isat fandom a Very Funny exception to this rule because from what i've seen they all got to watch siffrin's deteriorating mental state in real time and said "hey what if it was Worse. what if we put him through More"

[fheythfully]

3.9.24 "The Exhibit of Eorzea's Warrior of Light"

[eyes-blazing]

Welcome|| @divineandmundane

“It’s not really all that difficult to understand. Either you shut up or you get the fuck out.” Emrys wasn’t above using his height to tower over the annoying couple that had been hassling his favorite bartender for the better part of an hour. “Pick.”

The man decided to try and fight but then Emrys flashed his eyes to yellow and he backed down, paid and almost dragged his partner out the door.

“Jesus fucking Christ…”

[iamnmbr3]

I think it's so interesting how in the first half of 5th year when Harry is at his lowest Draco kind of backs off a bit and lets him be way more than usual. He doesn't really hate Harry or actually want to see him suffering or destroyed. For all he might claim otherwise even to himself. It's really striking. Because if they truly were just enemies you'd think Draco would revel in the opportunity to kick Harry when he's down and he really doesn't. Oh sure he does petty little things but he antagonizes Harry far less than usual till Harry's feeling a bit better and has gotten through the worst of his isolation in the first half of the year.

Tldr; they love each other your Honor

[spaltedrat]

what the polygun!!!

[louismygf]

some louis tomlinsons i never posted ^_^

[stil-lindigo]

craters.

a comic about a love story between two girls who only have each other, and take a chance on it.

Buy “Soliloquy Down To Three”, an anthology of blood stained sapphic comics (including this one) here.

[stars-n-spice]

Ugh.

Sometimes I remember that Bad Batch gave us this badass Black woman who was a liberator of ancient wonders and was like Indiana Jones but fucking cooler and witty, charming, and FUN and so so so nice and caring and understanding and she befriended the Bad Batch and gave them a safe place in the galaxy to call home and then made her the love interest of the heavily autistic coded white-washed Maori man and thus made them an interracial couple

AND THEN-

they killed off Tech and then used Phee as an uber driver for s3 and didn't give her any closure or anything for his death.