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campbell-rose · 7 months

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Helluva Rewrite (and some of my personal doodles)

Alrighty, so I finally found the motivation to draw up the entire I.M.P crew and finalize their designs! Introducing my version of the new and improved Immediate Murder Professionals!

I'm so freaking lazy so I didn't add shading or anything extra like that because ughhh. I also decided on some defining traits for imps depending on their ring, but only for the gang and the rings we've seen in the show so far

Wrath imps are larger, stronger, and spikier than other imps. Lust imps have varied bodies, but all have heart shaped barbs on their tails and leathery wings on their lower back. Greed imps are more slender than other imps and often wear jewelry. Gluttony imps are small and fast, high metabolisms so they can gorge. Sloth imps are easy to identify because they usually are just lying there doing fuck all and lack barbs on their tails.

Also, the scarring for imps is the same. White markings indicate scars. In the show I feel like it’s hard to tell what’s a scar (like Blitzo’s facial marks) and what’s a birth mark (like Moxxie’s freckles) so for my own sake, white marks are scars, black marks are birth marks or tattoos, end of story. Millie got her scars from fighting in the wrath ring, Blitzo got his scars from the explosion, and Moxxie’s freckle-like scars are cigarette burns. Should also note that imps are immune to hellfire, but not normal fire because... uhhh idk honestly it just seems more logical.

~ Helluva cutoff starts here ~

I kinda wanna show off my own imp designs for my little demon thing because helluva boss posts get traction and I just wanted someone to see them, so if you only came here for helluva content, feel free to stop reading lol

Okay, so I wanted the imps to all look like the same species but at the same time not at all. Essentially the imps in my series are based more on folklore surrounding them. In christian folklore imps are straight up evil, but I want all of my imps to just be little guys. Look at em, they’re just little guys. Imps were sometimes thought of as the familiars of witches, taking forms of different animals, so I wanted some of the imps to look animalistic, but it’s their behavior that reflects it more (which is hard to show in a still doodle). Also the imps are just color coded here so I know which is which, imps aren’t actually these specific colors in my world.

Greed imps tend to bind themselves to objects that they particularly adore – in some tellings imps were bound to objects like crystals and could be summoned by their masters. So Greed imps often have a specific item bound to them that they guard with their lives.

Sloth imps are the most harmless when they’re tired, it’s when they’re awake that they become the full on imps of folklore. They’re often paid in sugar cubes and used as servants in the sloth ring.

Gluttony imps are alluding to the fae origin of imps in Germanic folklore, having wings and being generally bug like and little shits. I wanted them to look like pixies almost.

Envy imps are the more attention seeking type who play tricks on humans to garner a reaction. Tricks such as attempting to drown people and such – harmless fun, you know? They’re actually a little based on Kappa I'll admit.

Lust imps have the habit of snatching babies, as in a lot of demons associated with lust (such as Lilith) tend to be obsessed with babies/pregnancy. The lust imps are nearly infertile, so they love taking babies to raise, then discard them once they’re annoyed.

Pride imps are based on the Lincoln imp (in short an Imp threw a rock at an angel and got turned into stone). They’re fluffy and covered in shiny fur since they live in the frozen layer of hell. Their horns are the largest of all imps, and their biggest source of pride – like if they break their horns, they’d rather die than live with the shame because their horns don’t grow back.

Wrath imps are based on the old art of imps you can find – bald little creatures with horns and tails. They’re the more feral animalistic imps, often acting on pure instinct and lacking much social structure. They do tend to exercise in their own way, as strength is their greatest feature.

Anywho if you read all that omg thank you for feeding my ego teehee. But for real, as much as I hate digital, I did enjoy drawing out the imp gang, I might (keyword MIGHT) draw out some rewritten scenes in comic format the most daunting part is actually doing it lmao.

I probably won't shove my own stuff into posts too often, I mostly did it because I wanted to compare my ideas for Imps to Viv's because I think mine are better sorry not sorry lmao. I like to actually research what I'm doing and incorporate it into my art and creations because i think of it like little easter eggs for people who like the things I like. Viv's version of Hell is my least favorite mostly because everything she does feels like bible fanfiction written by a middle schooler who thinks shouting penis in class is the peak of comedy.

#anti vivziepop #anti helluva boss #helluva boss redesign #helluva boss rewrite #helluva rewrite #oc art #minor demonology discussion #my art

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xeenybobean · 11 months

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"Behind that mask"

Miles Morales x Reader

Word count: 3k

This is an updated version! the original prompt was given to me by my friend @peachyfimls

Original prompt: can you do a miles morales x reader where the reader finds out hes spider man and his reaction?

It's a bit short!

Tags: @peachyfimls @sodapopzds @bluenotes75 @r3allytir3d @girl-calmdown

[if you wanna be tagged in future posts pls dm or comment!]

Summary: You and Miles have been childhood friends since birth, your mother and Miles’s mom Rio have been best friends since high school and have done everything together and the two of them are both in touch to this day. Once you and Miles were born the two of them wanted to get you both together so you would always stay at his apartment and she would always stay at your place. You both grew closer and closer together did everything together, and told each other everything, you were there for him and he was there for you. You both were stuck like glue never leaving each other's side but once you guys got to high school you notice a shift in your childhood best friend, Whenever you asked he never answered he would just brush it off like it was nothing.

You soon noticed the habits he picked up on avoiding you was one of them but you understand what you did wrong, you slowly began to realize he was hanging out with a girl named Gwen Stacy. You didn’t think much of it because you knew Miles loved you he was your childhood friend after all what was going on..? You were now in his room waiting for him in his apartment complex, the two of you were supposed to discuss a new idea for a graffiti art piece you two wanted to do at the abandoned train station but of course, he was late so you decided to snoop around...

⚠Warning!!⚠: NONE! Complete fluff | friendship bonding| love the fluff!! Since I had an angst one here's some fluff for you guys! |

“Now you know..sometimes we must keep things a secret to protect the ones we want the most.”

Here you were in his room waiting anxiously. You bit your lip gently and sighed and you looked at your phone waiting for your friend as you lay down in his bed smelling his scent from his blankets. “Where are you, Miles?..” You mumbled softly as you slowly sat up seeing his mother Rio coming in with a warm smile on her face. She could tell you missed him, it was written all over your face clear as day.

“Hey. I brought you some snacks..” she said softly as she placed a small kiss on your forehead the scent of freshly fried Arepa's filled Miles’s room. You began to drool slightly as you sat up fully as took the plate out of her hands gently.

“Thank you..” You whispered as you looked at her and she looked at you with a large smile as you took an Arepa and bit on one of the corners and instantly felt in heaven... Rio’s cooking was your favorite whenever you weren't at home. You wouldn’t want to eat anywhere that wasn’t at Miles’s home. You smiled and looked at her swallowing the bite you just took. “Good as always Mrs. Morales.” You smiled as she smiled back at you and pressed a kiss on your forehead.

“Of course. I’m sure Miles will be here soon..just stay tight amor.” her voice was soft as she pressed one last kiss on your forehead and left the room. You sighed and continued to eat the plate of freshly fried Arepas Rio made you. Once you finished you placed the empty plate on Miles’s nightstand. You began to grow bored as you stood up slightly and looked around his room to find his sketchbook. You chuckled slightly and grabbed it gently. Usually, Miles would hide his sketchbook from you let alone let you look inside of it for some odd reason.

You then sat back down on his bed and started flipping the pages skimming through his messy sketchbook gently as you stumbled on a drawing of Gwen, you flipped to the next page to see another and another, and another. The man was this boy lovesick. You sighed as you continually saw photos of Gwen drawn in his sketchbook with hearts all around her. “This is the girl you like huh Miles?..” you chuckled to yourself as you flipped the last page of his sketchbook to see something falling out.

You looked down at the floor and placed his sketchbook down as you stared at a Spiderman mask that was from a costume. You grabbed it gently and sniffed it to smell it reeked of sweat as you gagged slightly regretting your decision. You tilted your head slightly as you placed the mask on your lap.

“Why would he have something like this in the back of his sketchbook..” You wondered as you opened the last page that held the mask as your eyes grew wide, it was Miles. Wearing a Spiderman suit. You couldn’t believe your eyes. Was your childhood best friend Miles Spiderman? You instantly closed his sketchbook and placed it back where you found it as you continued to hold the damp mask in your grasp. You began to rethink, trying to think back to when the other Spiderman appeared in Brooklyn. You examined it, it looked like the same one the teen wore along with the other Spidermen that you saw on the news. It then clicked. Miles Morales. Your childhood friend was Spiderman.

You placed the mask under his sketchbook quickly hearing his doorknob jangle a bit. You wiped your sweaty hands as you stared at the door. Once it opened you were looking at your best friend..he had this dumb smile on his face as he latched himself onto you tightly. You were taken aback as you tumbled lightly, leaning on the wall for support.

“I missed you Y/N..” he spoke softly as he rested his head on your neck breathing in your warm scent..your perfume and your natural scent filled his nose and he instantly calmed down. You looked at him a bit confused, he wasn’t touchy nor affectionate towards you as he started to talk with Gwen and hang out with her instead. You slowly wrapped your arms around him gently as he gripped you tighter.

“Everything ok Miles? You're not usually this..touchy with me anymore ever since you've been hanging out with Gwen..” You mumbled feeling a little bit jealous as you felt him chuckling against your skin as you felt his gaze on yours.

“You jealous or something Y/N?” He teased as he inched a bit closer your noses almost touching as you stared at him with a confused expression on your face, he was never like this maybe he just wanted to mess around. You didn't know.

“Maybe I am jealous, I am your childhood best friend remember..not her.” you slowly pried Miles out of your grasp as you sighed and sat on his bed while swinging your legs back and forth gently. “You stopped hanging out with me and saying hi to me ever since she transferred what or how do you think that makes me feel? And now I find out your Spiderman? What are you gonna tell me next, that you have a secret girlfriend you’ve been hiding?” You said sarcastically as you looked at Miles.

Bro was pale as a rock. Frozen like a statue, he didn’t know whether to be happy or confused, has he always wanted to tell you? Yes, but his identity was supposed to remain secret. He promised Peter. He blinked a few times registering what you said to make sure he wasn’t hearing things as he walked towards you.

“H-how did you find out..” he mumbled softly as he crouched down to meet your gaze, his eyes were filled with panic and worries and you could feel his aura radiating off of his body. You needed to calm him down as soon as possible before he started spiraling.

“Your sketchbook..” you mumbled softly and sighed slouching your shoulders as you looked away from your friend. “I know you said I couldn’t look but. I was bored and you were late so it just piqued my interest! Then. I saw the mask and put the pieces together, why you were absent., always late..you not having human-like symptoms, your nightmare about his parents being killed by villains, etc..” you smiled faintly and looked at your friend as you felt his bed shifting slightly as he was now sitting next to you, his hands locked with his own as he hunched his back down staring on the floor.

You hated to see him in this state. You slowly ran your hand up and down his back gently as his body leaned against your lap. You looked down at him to see his gaze facing down instead of looking at you. You could tell he was processing a lot and what to say as he scrunched his eyebrows.

You began to slowly make your way to his hair as you began to play with his curls gently as he leaned into his touch gently his glossy eyes slowly making their way to yours. He was too precious for this world. You thought to yourself as you felt his hand holding yours gently you could feel the sadness radiating from him. You looked at him and smiled weakly and tried to change the mood of the room.

“I think it’s pretty cool if I'm being honest Miles..” You said softly as his attention went to you instantly you could see his worries wash away like nothing as he smiled at you widely his chocolate brown eyes staring into yours.

“Really?.. Do you think so?.. You aren’t upset at me?” you couldn't help but pinch the bridge of his nose and kiss his temple lightly as his cheeks slowly turned red, he looked at you in shock but his shocked expression changed to a smile as he continued to stare at you.

“Why would I be upset at you? Your my childhood best friend you have a good soul... Am I a little upset you didn’t tell me sooner? Yes, I am but..now I know. my best friend is fucking Spider-man how cool is that! Not everyone can say that they are personally close to a hero you know? I promise to not tell anyone you can trust me, dork.” You teased as he tackled you hugging you tightly and pushing you onto his bed. You felt him resting his face in your neck as you wrapped your arms around his torso to secure him in place you chuckled lightly seeing him in this sensitive attention-seeking touch-starved state. You slowly began to rub his scalp gently in circular motions as you heard him whimper into the crook of your neck.

“I’ve wanted to tell you so bad. It hurt me so much to not tell you..so bad. You had no idea the number of times when I had to lie to you broke my heart. sometimes we must keep things a secret to protect the one we want the most. Please understand..” your heart began to melt as you squeezed him tiger chuckling slightly as you kissed his forehead gently causing him to whimper just a bit as he hid his face in your neck still breathing in your scent.

“I understand Miles..don’t worry, your secret is safe with me forever and always... I'm so proud of you.” with those few words, he felt pride swelling his chest as he got out of your grasp and stood up taking his jacket off to reveal his Spiderman suit as he pulled his mask down to cover his face. You sat up and blinked slightly a bit confused about what he was doing let alone if someone would see.

“What are you doing? Someone can see you..” You said in a low hushed tone as you stared at his hand a bit confused you chuckled slightly taking his hand as he pulled you up out of his bed. Your body pressed against his as you heard him laughing through his mask.

“How about we take a swing yea? Show you how cool this is,” he said, before you could even register or think of a response he flicked his web to open the window, and off you both go. His arm was surrounding your waist gripping you tightly as he began to swing out of his room connecting his web to a nearby building as the two of you swing through the loud city of your home. You latched your arms around his neck tightly closing your eyes shut as you heard him laugh once more.

“You’ll miss the view if you keep your eyes closed! This is the best part of being Spiderman! Cmon just open your eyes for a quick second and if you don’t like it you can close them until we get to the train station alright?” he said as he continued to swing from one building to the next, the wind blowing through your body as you felt your heart racing, you didn’t want to open your eyes but you trusted your friend so you did what he suggested and boy did you instantly regret it. You began to scream and wailed as you felt his grip on your waist tightening your screams soon began to overlay with his sweet warm laugh, he shook his head and sighed.

“Maybe do keep your eyes closed..” he said chuckling softly as he swung from building to building as the sounds of the chaotic city began to die down... Once you both arrived at the abandoned train station he landed on the ground perfectly.

“You can open your eyes now.” he sighed chuckling still, you were practically clinging onto him like a baby, and your eyes began to twitch as you slowly opened them to see how close and tight you were holding onto your friend, you felt your cheeks heating up as you laughed awkwardly as you stood on the ground.

“We are never doing that again..” You said panting slightly as you bend over, your hands on your knees as you tried your best to catch your breath and slow down the pace of your racing heart. You heard Miles’s laugh echoing through your ear as he patted your back gently.

You couldn't even say anything until you felt his hand holding yours as he pulled you into the dark abandoned train station the two of you spent the rest of the day together graffitiing the sides of the station. Even though your childhood best was Spiderman you couldn’t love or care for him any less..it didn’t matter if he savers people. In your eyes, he was a hero already. And he trusted you with his whole heart something you would never give up or change whether he was a hero or not.

The bond between the two of you grew and grew, Miles showed you all the new tricks he could do in the air with his webs, and all the flips and combo attacks just amazed you more and more.

He liked showing off to you, he says it makes him feel good about his hard work and you couldn’t blame him. He was a hero after all..he was lucky to have you by his side wherever he felt guilty after missions, whenever he felt upset or sad he would swing by your place in the middle of the night to cuddle.

Whenever he got injured he went to your place to get patched up while also getting a tongue lashing out of you but he knew it was because you cared so much. He was a hero and you were his nurse.

He sleepovers almost every night after his patrol

Random jump scares seeing him hanging on your window

Brings you snacks after his patrol as a way of saying ‘thanks’

Lots of cuddles after a long day of saving the city

He loves loves loves when you tell him how proud you are of him, it makes him so happy and makes him push through it just so he can hear you say those three words.

You cover for him when his mother questions where he is on the phone. You were his backup excuse right off the bat if his mother questioned where he was.

You gave him advice when it came to him opening up to his parents about him being Spider-Man.

At this point, the boy should just live at your house cause he leaves everything at your place, his clothes, toothbrushes, computer, sketchbook, electronics, chargers and so much more stuff you had a buy a mini drawer for his clothes. That's how much he spends time with you after late-night patrolling.

Late-night calls, end in you comforting him and him staying the night at your place.

You were his ‘why’ was the person he wanted to protect the most besides his family.

He was glad you found out he was Spiderman because now your bond grew deeper than it ever was and you both supported and guided each other in the right path. Guess that's the perk of having a superhero as your best friend.

#spiderman #miles morales #x reader #miles morales x reader #fluff #xeenybobean writings #one shot #headcanon #beyond the spiderverse #spider verse #spiderman into the spiderverse #spiderman into the verse

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sasukimimochi · 1 year

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So i decided to repost the original sketches [plus one i thought was appropriate to put with these, since its got a butt i put it under the cut] and delete the cringe original post- since it didn't get any notes anyway- after cleaning them up/adding a block of color behind them [plus me toying with demon wwx's colors] so i hope you enjoy them!! More about the fic under the cut :D

The extra sketch that has a bumbum which is why the read more line. [plus the extra info and all].

Scroll to the bottom for links! [up to date as of 3/25/2023]

“Clash of Immortals” / COI is an upcoming project I’m super excited about with Demon WWX and Angel LWJ. I use my own version of hell/heaven for this, allowing for lots of fun details and some creatures unique to my universe, including A-Yuan who is a “Garden of Eden” [not drawn yet].

Information i can share!

Demon WWX / Wei Wuxian - Demon type: A black-blue feathered “Captive” or “Fallen” - a type of demon caused by cutting an angel’s ascension short as they are being lifted into the heavens, caused by demons trying to prevent as many new angels from entering heaven as possible. This means originally he was supposed to become an angel, but his line was cut and he was dragged past hell’s gates, causing him to descend instead of ascend once he passed through the gate.

This leaves a nasty scar on his back from the hook used to pull him up [if ascended the hook will disappear harmlessly] and this is why they are also nicknamed "Hook Demons" as they will sometimes even go around with the hook still in their back, just filed down, because they are going through a vital area and can't be fully removed.

Angel LWJ / Lan Wangji - Nearly a white wing, shares a nearly identical wing color to LXC, His is white with minimal jade undertones; he has MANY piercings to compensate his abilities in order to prevent his body from tearing apart. He does however have a unique trait- two of his flight feathers [one on each side] are completely black [I will test this with his design so don't hold me to this]. After his descent heaven is a bit perplexed- they allow this type of movement but LWJ is a very important for heaven’s force of angels, as one of the most powerful.

Fun Facts ;]

When they see each other for the first time as angel/demon they bristle, [in my universe, angels and demons feel wrong when in each other's presence, even if they're very soft and sweet. It'd probably be a good mirror to how LWJ and WWX don't necessarily get along in the actual series when they first meet too.] but then it’s a cheery reunion- LWJ might be somewhat uncomfortable, but WWX tames the sensation more easily as he is nearly unrestrained in power.

Someone comes within 50 feet of A-Yuan and Wei Wuxian sends the person’s heart to their throat just by looking at them despite this being a bad habit he probably shouldn’t use around the "Garden of Eden."*

*original species invented which will be explained better in story, I don't wanna spoil too much

and then we have "BED" HABITS

WWX is aggressive as all hell with everyone else besides his kind [in hell anyway bc he doesn't like everyone's attitude] -not in an intimate way he wouldn't do anything with anyone else- but becomes tame with LWJ, it's like a switch gets flipped. LWJ is the growling demon in bed while WWX is the purring angel, despite their anatomy quite clearly showing otherwise; and let me tell u I love purring demons and growling angels

NO ONE believes him when LWJ says wwx isnt the aggressive one, thinking the demon is tainting their precious second jade despite wwx not having a choice about his demonhood. LWJ be like: we still husbands regardless of who's the more aggressive one anyway. Yes, I’ve just decided we’re still married no extra ceremony required.

my COI music playlist can be found here. My favorite COI song is this one: "Into Darkness" by Thomas Bergersen.

all art in this post drawn in drawpile and edited on clip studio paint

Here's all the sketches for COI in order! ♥️ They update regularly on my original COI post [you are here] / the mdzs ff masterpost.

OG POST - Demon WWX & Angel LWJ [you are here].

COI - MXY YLLZ WWX Demon WIP COI - Chibi kisses COI - Cuddles COI - Slumber COI - hugs COI - Hellscape Concept art [ficlet included in this post] COI - Er-Gege COI - Marks COI - Reunion COI - Thank you! COI - I'm Home! (Previews) COI - I'm Home! ...

Reddit Posts!

See the OG Reddit post here [contains 11 drawings] Rough Hellscape Concept art [has more art here that i didn't post on Tumblr!] Slumber Hellscape Concept art [same as Tumblr] hugs/hold er-gege reunion Thanks [separated drawings] Marks Reunion Thank you! I'm Home!

See the Explicit™ COI ficlet here [i can't post this on tumblr, so i posted this on Reddit, sorry!

See the first peek at Ch 1 of COI here!

You can find all my other projects here!

Did you get this far? :0 hello! Thank you for reading it all ♥️ ♥️ ♥️

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onmyyan · 1 year

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Caspian at Christmas

T/W: Yandere shenanigans, suggestive themes, Cas being a cutie, christmas is celebrated by reader n Cas but just for the fun stuff like cute clothes n warm drinks and none of the religious trauma lmao (EDITED 12/16/22)

A/N: Not Requested, Sum short n sweet for the kids🖤🖤🖤 I still have a tooon of requests I need to post which I'm sorry for the delay about, they are otw pinkie swear okay onto the story!

Growing up Christmas was always your favorite time of the year, from the sweater weather to the permanent smell of coco and peppermint, it all wrapped around you like a blanket, comfy and simple.

Being the hopeless romantic you were, the cheesy things couples did around this time always called to you, back then it felt like a members-only club you couldn't get in but now you had Caspian, someone with an even bigger boner for all things rom-com than yourself, and really, who better to share these things with?

Cas has a very similar line of thought the moment he steps outside and his breath can be seen in the cool air, his mind quickly began to race around looking for the best way to celebrate the year coming to an end, his best year at that because the universe had gifted you to him.

In no time he opened the triple-locked folder on his phone, it contained intensely specific dates for you two, all detailed with your most likely reactions and how much you'd enjoy said activity. At this point, he had a rough draft for every occasion.

It took a lot of strength but that morning he managed to force himself away from your sleeping form without a kiss. He'd been planning this specific date since he found out about your love for the season, now was just the best time to execute it.

Having grown up in a full house of 7 there was always food being made, usually by the house matriarch with Caspian dutifully at his mama's hip, long before the rest of his family would rise, so he'd mastered the art of cooking quiet enough not to wake someone.

He made sure to time it all perfectly to be finished around the usual moment your pretty (e/c) eyes started to flicker open and bless him with another day together, the breakfast would be themed and like most of what he made, almost look too pretty to eat

Almost anyway.

"G'mornin Sugar. You're free today right?" He would ask setting the tray on his side of the bed before taking your hand to his lips, unable to resist himself, he would press small kisses into your knuckles as you agreed, making sure to act happily surprised when you respond as if he hadn't already seen and memorized your schedule for the week.

"What did ya have in mind hun?" You asked rubbing the sleep from your eyes, a gesture he couldn't help but coo at, as if reading your mind he gently lifted the steaming drink before you, tipping the smooth coffee gently into your parted lips, at first his little habit of hand feeding you was a little jarring but he was just so endearing and sweet it wasn't long before you indulged him, after all it wasn't so bad being doted on like a princess.

His smile was worth it all, the pleased little hum you'd hear whenever you did something he enjoyed which, if we're being honest here, was most things, had a familiar warmth settling in your tummy.

"I wanna take you out. Go get our tree from this cute little farm, it's a thirty-minute drive so I wanted you full before we left."

Something about the language he used had heat rising to your face. Ours. The simple word holding so much weight.

His gaze held you in place as he took you in, always staring that one, if it were anyone else you'd have been uncomfortable but he made you feel like artwork being examined.

He'd installed bedroom camera's for a few reasons, one of his favorite's though, had to be the ability to capture and replay moments like now, where you'd get that awe'd look on your face, completely surprised someone would do something like this for you- but he would, he'd do anything to keep his soulmate happy, this was nothing in his mind, not with what he had laid out for the two of you down the line.

Our boy is a long-term planner, he knows how he's going to propose, where he'll take you for your honeymoon, and the kind of house you'd buy together(read: the house he's going to buy for you both after he finds out exactly what you like) the bakery you'll open and co-own, the dog you'll have(he's planning for one but would literally get you an emu if u asked for it- the man is flexible okay?)

"Thank you for breakfast baby, did you already eat?" You pressed a small kiss into his hand, returning his previous action much to his delight. Your free fingers delicately danced along the road his freckles mapped out on his skin, tracing the little constellations with a sigh you relished in the peace he brought with him everywhere.

"Oh I'm gonna eat- soon as you're done," the wicked grin on his handsome face twitched with intent for a split second before returning to that warm look from before. The kneading grip he had on the meat of your inner thigh told you everything you needed to know about his plans. "N' I've been a good boy so, I get my breakfast in bed."

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere x y/n #yandere oc caspian #yandere oc #yandere oc x reader #caspian delmont #caspian x reader #my oc

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browzerhistory · 6 months

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because i have been Enabled (one person said i should) i'm going to post my late night analysis of leaf pile by the front bottoms! under the cut since it gets kind of long.

(obligatory disclaimer that this is my interpretation of the song and i'll probably miss some stuff or say something you don't agree with; but the beauty of art is you don't have to agree with one another on what it's about. note that i address brian as the singer and not his name, since he's said that not all of his songs are about him specifically.)

before i get in-depth with the lyrics, i want to discuss the theme. this song references a lot of tfb's other music and overall carries a very nostalgic/reflecting tone while still looking forward to the future with hope. i think it's an excellent example of tfb's growth as a band, both in technical skill and general outlook (hehe) on life. while their older songs carried a general air of hopelessness (specifically "it's hard to get better in an environment that drags you back into bad habits"), leaf pile exemplifies the turn towards exhausted but determined optimism.

now, onto the lyrics to support my argument.

if you've listened to the front bottoms for any amount of time, the very first line will be familiar.

I wanna be

this seems like a silly place to make my first note - it's just three words - but they're the same opening words to another one of my favorite tfb songs, vacation town. however, the line in vacation town continues with "that comfortable place where you write and read." i don't doubt that the use of this line was intentional, as tfb references their other songs frequently, and vacation town's theme of being stuck in the past compliments leaf pile well.

that person again

the one that I am right now, again

for the rest of my life, and then

I wanna lay down in the leaf pile, but I can't

fear of change is a common theme both in life and in tfb's music. this opening verse establishes a singer who wants to live in familiarity forever before dying ("laying down in the leaf pile"), but can't because, well, that's just what being alive is.

I wanna be that person again

the one that I am right now, again

for the rest of my life, again

I wanna lay down in the leaf pile

but I can't slow down

or I'm gonna crash, crash, crash, crash, crash

the repeat of the first verse emphasizes its point, but the changes also bring new ideas. the repetition of again affirms that the singer wishes to relive the past.

the addition to the last two lines is another reference to the rest of tfb's discography, though a lot less specific than the last one. the front bottoms sing about motorcycles in their songs a lot, and when riding a motorcycle, like a regular bike, keeping up speed is important because if you're too slow, the vehicle loses balance and falls. this also acts as a metaphor for life (sensing a pattern yet?), since dwelling too long on the past can make you lose sight of the future and get caught up in your regrets.

I wanna feel that same sense of calm

I wanna feel that same sense of peace

it felt so real before you got here

it'll be restored after you leave

after this verse, the chorus repeats again. the first two lines reaffirm a longing for a past that was easier and kinder. the second two remind me of dissociation. perhaps the singer, in meeting up with/seeing someone who reminds him of his past, loses himself in it.

(slightly unrelated note: this upcoming part of the song makes me insane. i love it so much.)

oh man

nothing ever kicked in or as hard as you did

I feel anxious, do you?

like I have to make a move

I'm just gonna do what you did

the singer feels cornered. he isn't ready to move into the future, but he can't keep clinging to the past. he addresses someone, probably the same "you" from the last line, and tells them that nothing ever kicked in or as hard as they did. this could be literal, as some of tfb's older songs also reference domestic/intimate partner violence, but there's definitely a metaphorical aspect to it too. the person the singer is addressing has had a profound and negative effect on his mental health, so much so that they're incomparable to anyone else in his life.

the singer says he's anxious, wonders whether the other person is, then says he's just going to do what they did. based on what we already know about the other person, we can assume it's nothing good.

I cut some ties with a few good friends

for it to be over how ready I am

I closed my eyes, I opened my eyes

but my mouth was closed the entire time

the singer cuts off "a few good friends;" presumably this is the move he had to make, and what the other person did too. he says he's ready for "it" to be over, which is probably related to what he had to do.

closing and opening his eyes, but keeping his mouth shut, may also symbolize the singer observing what's going on around him without making it worse by saying something wrong, which is something tfb has sang about in previous songs.

montgomery forever

first you get hurt, and then there's healing

it's a process, believe me

you stole my notebooks and now you're reading

this verse (my favorite in the song. if you even care) references another song on this album, montgomery forever, which is a song about the neighborhood brian lived in as a kid getting demolished. the usage of the title, followed by the assurance that grieving is a process, shows a resolution to grow through the challenges and losses the singer faces.

the notebook line also references a couple other tfb songs, where notebooks are almost sacred for their containment of the singer's unfiltered, innermost thoughts.

I can't wait to hear you say

that I got back a couple weeks ago

to our friends and family

I can't wait to hear you say

that I got back a couple weeks ago

this line also hits very close to home for me. i lost my best friend, joseph, to suicide when i was just 13 and he was 14. i wanted to believe that he would come back from the hospital eventually, that i'd be able to say he got back a few days ago and thank goodness he was fine. i wanted to do so many things with him that i never got to. i won't lie; i cried pretty hard when i first heard this part. it still gets to me when i'm feeling particularly sad.

but it was all to see

who could ride a motorcycle faster

as for me, I still believe

this line is a direct pull from an old demo, sexy and alive (give an inch). despite being an arguably old song, sexy and alive takes a hopeful tone more like tfb's new music. the usage of this verse connects with the theme of growing while connecting to the past, as well as earlier references to motorcycles as a metaphor for living.

do I seem anxious to you?

do I seem backed into a corner?

as if I had to make a move

but you could tell I didn't wanna

another repetition of an earlier line. the singer didn't want to make the move/cut off his friends, but his circumstances forced his hand, which made him feel anxious and cornered. this verse is repeated a couple times, at the same time as the next one:

I can't remember, it's all a blur

the person you are and the person you were

I can't remember, it's all a blur

the person you are and the person you were

another pretty strong reference to dissociation, specifically dissociative amnesia imo. (DISCLAIMER: i'm absolutely not armchair diagnosing brian with anything. a singer doesn't have to only write about things they've personally experienced, and it's a well-established fact that brian writes a lot of stories into his songs that aren't about him (the most well-known example being father). i just have a dissociative disorder myself and felt really called out by this line lol.) this lines up well with previous references to dissociation in the song.

I don't wanna talk

I don't wanna talk, I wanna look out the window

I don't wanna talk

I don't wanna talk, I wanna look out the window

these are the last lyrics in the song. the singer is tired of trying to explain how he feels to the other person, who either isn't aware of the harm they've caused him or just doesn't care. he's given up talking it out and resigned himself to looking out the window; moving on without the other person.

thanks for reading all of this, if you got this far. if you thought any of what i had to say was perceptive or cool, let me know and i'll post another analysis - probably for hooped earrings or batman since i love both of those songs too (though i may just post those for fun). there's also a possibility i do a post like this for songs from other bands i like.

#the front bottoms #lyric analysis #can you tell im insane about the way tfb reuse lyrics and motifs and gives them new meaning. can you tell

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darlin-collins · 11 months

Text

Red paint

We've been talking about parents darlin anf sam and here's my take on it

Sheeesh it's been a year since I've written a redacted fic, tell you what you think (good, bad, advice, ANYTHING, i wanna learn how to write)

Notes: sam&darlin / a little girl oc/some blood and injuries are mentioned, nothing major, just what we had on the second sam audio, hiding an injury, dark past, dead parents, a lil bit traumatized child, fluffy angst if you will, slightly edited and read before being posted, soo yeah, no beta we die like the girls parents

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They opened the apartment's door as quietly as possible for someone in their state, a hand pressed to their side,having limped their way up stairs, and vision blurry from blood loss

They tip-toed to the couch and sat there, breaths leaving their lungs in quiet pants and sighs as the tension built in their legs was somewhat relived and for a moment, and they were tempted to just close their eyes... Only to open them again, wide, as the realization doomed on them, they're currently bleeding,, if they do fall asleep they might not wake up once again, and as much as the idea appealed to them they can't leave, not yet, not if Quinn is still out there, not with the the child sleeping in their room, oblivious to what's happening around her..

With a curse they sat up, reached their phone from their pocket, the screen broke, again, Lily will be mad that her little art pieces won't look good anymore, they need to fix it tomorrow if they wanted to avoid her lecture about being careful with a phone and paying attention when its in their hand

They chuckled at the thought, if only she knew why their screen is always broken like this

With blurred eyes they barely managed to hit the contacts bottom, so they just called most recent number in the list, it's not david, it's certainly not another pack member,so who can it be-Oh.. It's the cowboy from the other night

They sucked in a breath "hey cowboy" damn it hurts to talk, but they kept their voice low

They heard him chuckle on the other side "it's Sam"

"it's whatever" they joked, " ya know any private healers, ones that keep their mouth shut?" they hoped that their words weren't as slurred as they think "why? Are you alright?" he asked "yeah I'm ok, i just got in some fight,pretty banged up though " they whispered "what- well how bad is it, are you alright?? " his voiced raised a little, filled with worry "shhh keep you voice down, i said I'm fine, it just needs a patch job" they answered, covering the bottom of their phone to make less sound "why haven't you gone to a healer yet?" his voice came out muffled, well shit... "they'll ask questions! "

"They'll ask questions!?" he echoed in disbelief, huffed "when the do just tell them to shut up and heal you" his voice was only getting higher "hushhh! " they said, again "keep it low!" "Where are you?" he asked "my place? " it was an answer, but it sounded more like a question "no like- address?" he corrected "the heck you wanna know my address for?" they censored the word "hell" mostly out of habit now "because I'm not having you bleeding out on my conscious when i can do something about it", what?

"now address " "wha-" they started to ask "-address. " he ordered again, they sighed and gave him the address "I'm coming over" what!? What!!??

"wait no-" the line hang up

Well fuck

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He barely got to knock on the apartment's door when it swung open, the wolf appeared, behind it "you look rough" he commented, they leaned away from the door opening it wider so he can enter "just keep it down" they whispered, going back to the couch and sat there, head falling into it, sharp eyes still monitoring his every move, he sat besides them "can i touch? " he asked gently, voice low, they blinked, surprised, and his heart ached at the thought of them never been asked something like that, and once more his gaze trailed down the lines of scars that littered their skin, now covered in blood, and it confirmed his theory "so?" he mumbled again, they unfreezed and nodded, whispering something about him being here to heal them and still asking.

A while into the healing he noticed that the wolf is trying to keep themselves quiet, and whenever his voice would get higher, they tell him to keep it down, and he worried if they had a head injury,

"did you take any hits to the head? " he whispered, "no, why? " they asked him back "well you've been keeping yourself and me quiet, i suspected that your head hurts from noise" he reasoned "no i didn't hit my head, it's... Complicated " they said

They sat in comfortable science after he was done with healing them, that is until he heard a door open, the wolf looked at him, wide eyes, and mouthed "hide" as they stood up

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Tank stood up and went to the back of the couch, making it seem they're just leaning on it, giving speace to the vamp in their living room on the couch to lay on it and be out of sight.

"hey Lily" they smiled as the little girl appeared out of their room

"tank! You're home" she said happily "what where you doing? Why is your clothes all red"

"i was painting using red paint" they lied

"really?! Can i see it" The girl asked

"sure, little radiostar"

Lily is a 10 years old child of two, sonal energetics that died at the hands of quinn before tank met him,he lied to them and told them he saved her when he found her parents dead, she lived with him for a while, him wanting to make her like him, before he and tank fought and he fled and left her behind they had to break into his place so they could take her, but to avoid the pack knowing all of this they didn't tell the department about her, which left them no choice but to take care of her and not traumatize her, not anymore than what quinn did already, she probably woke up from a nightmare and came looking for them.

They croushed under the couch and pulled out a painting, it had red paint on it in different shades and shapes

They tried to be quiet when they strained one of the freshly healed wounds on their body, they stood up and showed it to her

"wow! it's so beautiful!" her eyes shined and sparkled and they wished they weren't laying to her again "i want to help you finish it!"

"yeah? Well i was already planning on coming over and finishing it tomorrow, so how about you go back to the room till i shower and join you? And we'll deal with it in the morning? " they sing-sang to her "ok!" she jumped, turned around and close the door behind her again

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Sam listened in shock and awe to the wolf and the a little girl talking, how they laughed, how they almost were happier because she was around, and then the girl went back to the room, and they turned to look at him over the couch.

They mumbled a thank you let him go on his way

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"So yeah that's what actually happened" tank looked a their 15 year old teen that glared at them, she's taking to call sam dad, which made them go nuts because "you know him for 5 years! You've known me for 11! Why does he get to be called dad and im just 'tank'??" as they put it

"red paint my ass" Lily rollled her eyes

"well it's your fault you thought i was capable of doing any type of art" they responded "expect martial art of course" they added

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Please if you're one of the 6 people that saw this when i saved my draft and it got posted pretend you didn't:)

#redacted asmr #redactedasmr #redactedverse #redacted darlin #redacted tank #redacted sam #redacted asmr sam #redacted asmr darlin

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accio-victuuri · 2 years

Text

The 95% verdict 💌 + commentary

since it’s 9/5, this will be the perfect opportunity to share some more details on the whole 95% story. @potteresque-ire already detailed it here but i wanna focus on the actual verdict. It’s so interesting how most of it sounds true, and the fact that this was shared back in 2018 when no one had any behind the scenes photos, videos or interviews to reference.

I am not really a 100% believer in stuff like this but I have to admit that sometimes it has some truth to it. It’s not hurting anyone either to read what these people have to say and get some direction / insight into things.

Here goes the details of that reading between ZZ/WYB 😌 It’s not just the 95% calculation, there was a whole reading between them.

There is light, harmony, and joy in this relationship, and both parties benefit from it. The comfort of the soul is very conducive to the development of intimate relationships. You may not want to please each other freely, enjoy each other's company, but deep inside have a deep love for each other. If you live together, you will often have good family atmosphere, with both comfort and beauty. They satisfy each other, need each other, depend on each other and can be happy because of each other's existence.

As soon as I read this first part, I knew I had to make a CPN post. The thing about both parties benefiting is so true! Never mind what haters say that they “use each other” ( lol. I mean it’s partly right but without the negative connotation ) They really do benefit from being together, even as friends, they both bring out the best in e/o. Also the part about having a deep love even if they don’t show it sounds so much like 2018 ZZ/WYB. All the play fights and interactions we saw that make us roll our eyes cause they keep dancing around the fact that they are meant to be together. Finally, that bit about their home life. Ugh. I love domestic ZZ/WYB, and I’ve talked about that here. From cooking/washing to folding clothes and everything in between.

This may be a romantic experience that is called “at first sight”. The possibility of love also means that you may establish a relationship like lightning. You may meet in some unusual situations or situations with strong the feeling of electric shock. It may be a time that makes each other highly excited and your relationship may also be unconventional or unusual. Yes, the way of getting along is often not the usual way, Xiao Zhan will be satisfied with Wang Yibo. The passion, freedom and new world brought by Bo have gained a lot from each other. You are also suitable for developing some unusual hobbies, such as astrology, science, occultism, ultra-modern art, etc. In addition, the more independent your minds are in this relationship, the higher the rapport will be, both can develop into like-minded good partners.

The whole at first sight prediction is giving me goosebumps. Only because this is what a lot of us have said. granted, they met in 2017 so the person making this reading might have taken some clue into that. However, this line : Xiao Zhan will be satisfied with Wang Yibo. Wait, satisfied? Satisfaction. Isn’t that ZZ’s solo song? How come. This reading was made 9/1/2018 and that song name wasn’t even out yet. Also the way it says ZZ will be the one satisfied and not the other way around. I also wanna know what unusual habits they developed because of their relationship. 🙃

There is a strong attraction between you, and even a sense of fate. Xiao Zhan - The appearance of Wang Yibo made him passionate, profound and full of desire. However, the relationship between you may not necessarily have too much relaxation, romance and comfort. pleasure, and more emphasis on strong emotions, complex experiences, overly obsessive— even a certain danger because of the fear of betrayal. In this relationship, Xiao Zhan needs to look directly at his inner demands, learn to give Wang Yibo trust and give himself a sense of security, otherwise it will be easy to have the feeling of being controlled and dominated by Wang Yibo. Maybe when love is too deep, it feels like that life is in the hands of the other party, I am even more afraid of being hurt. please remember, only trust can save the relationship from crisis and realize new life. If it is business partnership, when trust is established, you will dig out the hidden wealth and achieve win-win benefits.

and now we have come to a bit more controversial part of the reading. Do I believe that ZZ/WYB’s relationship is full of sunshine and rainbows? Of course not. I can only imagine what it must be like for them in the beginning. The uncertainty of it. Strong attraction? Fate? Definitely. and oh I love the bit here about Bobo making ZZ passionate. Yes. He definitely had that change in him when he met the gremlin and especially when they are together. Remember that this is only a reading, what is said about ZZ is here and the advice is not a fact. I wanna believe over time, as in any other relationships, they have found a balance that works for them.

The highlight of this relationship is the connection and communication that you have. In the future, Xiao Zhan can intuitively understand Wang Yibo's thoughts and intentions and produce greater emotional fluctuations. Wang Yibo is very willing to put his thoughts and express it clearly to Xiao Zhan and give Xiao Zhan good advice. In a sentence: It is not uncommon to meet love and sex in life, but the strange thing is encounter understanding.

I like this part because it talks about the future and how their relationship became what it is today. Well, as soon the 2019 promos we can already see this understanding between them. The intuitive way they communicate. This is scarily accurate. I also like how WYB is supposedly expressing himself clearly to ZZ — knowing how WYB is most of the time, quiet, it makes me somft thinking he made the effort because he wants to reach an understanding with his zhan ge.

It can be said that meeting TA is the most comfortable way to get along and the most gentle companion. Xiao Zhan will feel full of joy, the feeling of being appreciated and accepted,Also enjoy the way Wang Yibo sees himself. Wang Yibo speaks from the heart. I love Xiao Zhan's way of doing things and behavior, never stingy with his own compliment. The two can be more considerate, tolerant, and respectful to each other. Live in harmony, enjoy the intimacy and sharing with each other.

When it comes to emotional patterns, you have strong similarities. This includes similarities in psychological feelings and emotional fluctuations, the inner need for a sense of security. Together, we can always understand each other's thoughts. The needs of the other party, full of deep tacit understanding and dependence, can do spiritual communication. It is very beneficial to a long-lasting, stable relationship.

A stable relationship. BXGs like to say this when it comes to them and I wanna believe that this is true. It does not mean they don’t have problems — they do, but they work it out. You can feel the sense of calm in when you watch them and that happiness. It affects and shows in everything they do. I hope it continues and they can live peacefully. 😊

Again, this is not an avenue to aggressively speculate about their relationship/dynamics. The purpose of this post is to share more of the 95% story and why it’s such a popular part of fandom history.

- END.

#yizhan #bjyx #all of this is cpn

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harudnae · 7 months

Text

This is the NSFW fic I wrote for the @op-xreader-zine, with art from nastyhornz!

Also posted on AO3 on 2023.09.20

Rating: Explicit

Pairing: Shanks x gn!Reader (no pronouns used)

Summary: Your girlfriend introduces you to her husband.

Content warnings : PWP, afab gender-neutral Reader (no pronouns used), post-timeskip (pre-Wano), alcohol drinking, kissing, groping, blowjob, penetrative sex (Reader receiving), cum shot

Word count: 2k

By now you have a good grasp of how deep it runs along with the kind of people it’s connected with all across the Blues, including the most feared pirates of the era. You’ve been at sea for long enough that you’re used to their codes, habits, and tendencies, and when it comes to trading with them, you trust your gut feeling because it’s never betrayed you.

- Who said information was the only thing worth trading?

Over the past ten years you’ve made a name for yourself in the Underworld.

Despite all this, one pirate remains inscrutable: Red-Haired Shanks.

You’ve been trading with him for years, yet you still can’t quite pin him down—not in the literal sense, though you wouldn’t mind either.

The man can be straightforward when he wants but he remains slippery, true to his reputation of powerful Yonkou under a relaxed facade. Such a strong energy, shrouded in mystery. Very handsome to boot, and sometimes flirtatious too, tiptoeing around the fine line between business and pleasure.

You’ve wondered what it’d be like to cross said line, too... To be fair, it’s pretty clear you’d been pining for each other for a while now, and it’s only out of professional caution that you never initiated anything. Still, it’s always a pleasant surprise when you answer your den den mushi to hear his voice. Civil and cautious as ever, you keep the conversation to the bare minimum.

“What do you want?”

“A headcount, and the whereabouts of anyone you can get currently residing on Hachinosu. A few millions if you’re in.”

You purse your lips and squint—on a weird stroke of luck, you just so happen to have most of the intel he’s looking for. “How many is a few?”

The den den mushi slightly smiles. “Fifty.”

Your eyebrows shoot up in delighted surprise. “You’ve got a deal.” You provide the name of a quiet port town along with a date and time. Once you get acknowledgement you hang up, spine tingling with excitement at the prospect of meeting with him soon.

On the agreed upon day, Shanks waits for you on the outskirts of town, a black cape wrapped around him with the hood up to conceal his identity. The half-baked disguise would fool a regular citizen, maybe a witless pirate, but you had traded with him often enough to know better.

Your heart beats faster as you recognize all too well his lopsided smile curving under the hood at your approach, but you avoid his gaze and keep an even pace as you walk past him.

He follows you into a deserted alley and proceeds with the exchange.

You merely comment, “That’s generous.”

“That was our agreement.”

“Those two aren’t mutually exclusive.”

Shanks pulls his hood back, freeing a few red strands as he reveals his face.

“Thanks, as always,” he says.

You nod slightly. “My pleasure.”

“Say, I’m gonna have a drink in town. Wanna join me? My treat.”

You look back up and hold his gaze, full of mischief and determined. His offer is unusual, though somewhat unsurprising since the few conversations you’ve had together gave you hints of mutual interest, and it’s the first time he actually makes a move. A smirk curves your lips. “Why not?”

Shanks offers to go to an inn downtown, which is pleasantly lively yet not too crowded. As promised, he treats you to a drink, then another after tempting you into staying a little longer. On the surface he’s in it for the small talk, but you see the way he observes you, or the way his smile keeps growing as you indulge him in a silly, innocuous story.

You’re not drunk yet—making sure to keep valuable information to yourself— just pleasantly buzzed, enough for your gaze to linger a little longer on his lips or his hand as you chat, filing the mental images for later perusal.

Shanks leans a little over the table between you, making your cheeks heat up at the proximity. “Who do you work for, really?”

You raise an eyebrow. “You should know better than to ask me that, Red-Hair.”

He holds your gaze and drops his voice a little, “Too bad. I’d hate to have the hots for a World Government dog.”

“You’re not serious,” you jab back.

Shanks flashes you his lopsided smile again. “I’m always serious.”

You know for a fact that he isn’t, but you still take the bait. “And what makes you think I’d be interested too?”

He lifts a scarred eyebrow. “Never said that.”

A slip-up, that’s rare coming from you, when knowledge is power and your main source of revenue. You blame the beer for your sloppiness, rolling your eyes and evading, “Like you’re gonna say that just for the sake of it. Please, Red-Hair, I’m not naive.”

“Never said that you are, either; I wouldn’t be trading with you otherwise.”

You mentally slap yourself for the second example of carelessness that evening, and glare. “Fair.”

His smile grows larger. “But since you mentioned it... are you? Interested, I mean.”

You give him a quick once over. You know you should keep your guard up, but you let it down twice in a row just now; it’s been too long and the tension between you two electrifies the air at this point. You lick your suddenly dry lips.

“Do you really need to ask?”

Shanks hums. “I’ve got a room here, you know.”

You huff a light chuckle as you realize the whole drink-at-the-inn thing was well thought out. “Shall we?”

Shanks graciously leads the way upstairs and into his room. You’ve just stepped in when he locks the door and wraps his arm around your waist to pull you into his personal space.

A little short of breath, you quietly tease, “What’s the hurry?”

He bites his lower lip. “I waited too long,” he quietly confesses, and dives in for a kiss.

You almost melt at the contact, long-awaited and far better than your expectations, his lips soft and warm against yours. You lean into his touch, wrapping your hands around his shoulders for support, then moan into his mouth when he slides his tongue between your lips.

Shanks’ warm hand slides up and curls around the back of your neck, tilting your head to deepen the kiss, assertive and demanding as he walks you backwards, trapping you with his bulk against the closest wall.

When he finally leans back, you gasp for air and slide his cape off his shoulders, taking a moment to visually appreciate his strong build. Then you bring a hand to his chest, palming at a pectoral as you idly bite your lower lip.

“Like what you see?” he teases, flashing you his trademark lopsided smile.

You meet his gaze and counter, “Not enough yet.” You run your hands down his torso and undo the few buttons on his shirt before sliding the irrelevant garment off his broad shoulders.

Shanks braces his arm on the wall next to your head, still smiling, then he leans in and huskily asks, “What’s your trade?” His breath raises goosebumps where it lands across your neck in a sexier reenactment of your usual conversations.

Your head falls into the curve of his shoulder. Determined to get the best out of this situation, you set aside all thoughts of professionalism and crane your neck to murmur under his ear, “Fuck me.”

Shanks leans in again, just close enough that you can feel his smile against your skin as he goes on, “What’s in it for me?”

You exhale a quiet chuckle and tuck your thumbs into Shanks’ sash. You unwrap and drop it, then you push him back slightly. Then, holding his gaze, you sink to your knees, sliding his pants down on the way, revealing tented underwear.

His pupils widen and he lifts very interested eyebrows. “You’ve got a deal.”

You smile and slide his underwear down before leaning in, only breaking eye contact when you wrap your lips around his throbbing cock. You start slow and gentle, but a few encouraging moans later you’re properly blowing him off, holding his hips and coating his rock hard erection with spit.

Shanks groans when his tip rubs against the back of your throat, and his hips tense under your hands for a brief moment.

You lean back, running your tongue on the underside of his cock as you let it slide out of your lips. You look up and exhale a quiet pleased sound, a smile curving your lips.

Shanks is absolutely gorgeous, chest and shoulders moving with each breath, muscles taut with restraint, a curtain of red hair casting shadows across his handsome face.

Your eyes linger on his tongue as it darts out to wet his lips, then you meet his gaze, heavy and wanting.

Shanks gently rocks his hips forward, rubbing the head of his cock against your still drawn tongue. You curl your tongue under his frenulum, making him hiss then exhale a deep moan. Biting his lower lip in an obvious show of restraint, he slowly pushes further while his gaze drifts down to your mouth.

Acknowledging his carefulness, you softly hum and invitingly open your mouth wider.

Shanks’ scarred eyebrow briefly twitches, and after a brief hesitation he leans back to get out of your way.

Mildly disappointed, you lick your lips and throw him a curious glance.

Shanks squats down, his intense gaze diving into yours as he cups your chin and tilts it up. His warm breath fans over your lips when he says, “You sure know how to trade.” And he dives in to claim your mouth.

You’re almost out of breath when he finally breaks the kiss and pulls you up so you’re both standing again.

Shanks’ wandering hand raises goosebumps on your back where it snuck under your shirt, and there’s mischief in his smile when he next says, “I’ll hold my end of the deal, then.”

Flattered by his eagerness, you crack a smile and exhale a soft chuckle, then gasp when he flips you around, pushing you against the wall once more with his strong body.

Shanks leans back and pulls your bottom garments down in one swift movement, taking a moment on his way back up to slide his fingers across your inner thigh.

You step out of your clothes and brace your arms on the wall, curving your back for better access. Your breathing gets heavier once his fingertips find your folds, spreading the wetness there and teasing your entrance.

Shanks’ fingers are removed too soon, only to be replaced by his spit-coated cock that he slides into you without further ado.

Your fingers curl against the wall and you exhale a lewd moan once he’s sheathed in. “Oh, fuck...”

“Oh yeah”, Shanks growls, and he starts thrusting into you right away, hard and fast.

With every other sinful sound passing past your lips under his ministrations, you feel his cock throbbing into you, stretching you further, and you bet he’s close already. You turn your head around and bite your lower lip at the view.

Tanned skin glistening with sweat over taut muscle, brow furrowed in the effort, pretty lips slightly parted, dark gaze locking with yours–Shanks is close alright, and you’re not faring much better. His hand slides from your hip to your back, tracing the dip of your spine up to the back of your neck, pushing you against the wall while he fucks you silly.

A harder thrust makes you see stars lingering behind your eyelids when you close your eyes. You slide a hand down and press it over your swollen clit, reaching for the orgasm that’s been building up inside you. Your inner walls flutter around Shanks who pounds deeper in return, finally sending you off the edge.

You’re just starting to come down from cloud nine when he pulls out and tucks his cock between your ass cheeks.

Shanks cums with a series of heavy moans, throbbing against you and painting your lower back with cum. After he leaned back and helped clean you up, he asks, “You won’t tell me who you work for, huh?”

“Mhm. The only thing I can say is that the Underworld and the World Government don’t really mix.”

“Ooh, is that so?”

You have a feeling he already knew that, so you simply shrug.

“Then I’m afraid I’ll have to require another trade, soon.”

#one piece #op fic #op x reader zine #nae's writing #shanks #shanks x reader #thirst material #one piece x reader #x reader

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seokjinsonlyone · 11 months

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if one of the members hit u up on social media somehow n y’all get serious, would u drop everything and move to korea to be with them?

without a moment of hesitation as soon as they say "do u want -" i'm already 6 hours into the plane ride like for any member the answer is yes i'm madly in love wit da whole crew but now i wanna play this scenario out

also i'm doing this under the assumption that this is post enlistment like i'm not moving to korea just for my man to be gone for 2 years 😭 like i'd wait for them no DOUBT but i'll wait in america with my family in the comfort of my own home 😌

okay so for jk i'd move but we could NOT live together like we got to learn to love each other in person bc lemme tell u he'd piss me off and i'd annoy him so bad if we lived together off the jump like i have a morning job so being up at 1-5 in the morning singing and cooking and is not the move and then look i'm a fan of ambience i am but a bad bith got depression i got to have the lights on or else i'd never do anything skskksdk so since i'd be living alone i'd def need to have a job so idk what energy i'd have left for him LOL like it'd require a lot of adjustments on both our parts bc we is both weird and oddly particular all in all either he'd have to love me a whole lot to make us work or i think the sex would keep us together for a good 3-4 months before he realizes it's not worth it but i would stay in korea for at least a year like i could nOt show my face back in america any sooner than that. (side note: i think if i let him provide for me we'd be super compatible tbh but then we'd be more like besties instead of bf gf) approximate success rate: 46%

oh lawd wit tae i'd have to battle with the dog like i think we could live together but me and tannie would be mortal enemies he’d be my sworn nemesis like straight up dr doofenshmirtz and perry the platypus the way we’d be at each other’s throats bc all he gotta do is turn his neck backwards and hit me wit dat judgmental glare one time and i’m ready to square up but tae seems like the type fall in love very hard so if he’s asking me to move to korea for him he’s willing to make it work and frfr all i gotta do is take yeontan out on a walk one good time he gon get tired bout halfway through and then look for me to hold him and that'll settle most of our differences we may not be best friends but we'll have come to an understanding then all that's left to do is work on tae like get him to get the dog off his mouth off the table and out the kitchen and it's smooth sailing fr i feel like he'd alternate between being super clingy and kinda distant which would be a little frustrating a little irritating but we could cope like if we could just get through that adjustment period it'd be fine. approximate success rate: 72%

if i was with joonie i think the most source of contention would be over decoration like y'all know me and u know them ugly little couch pillows would have to be the first thing to go LOL but after that like okay i wouldn't try to take over but i would just need a space for me that feels like my own that i belong there not just be amongst one of his hyperfixations y'know? like he just has so much art in his place we would need to edit it down so i wouldn't feel like i'm constantly living in an exhibition paint the walls get some more plants bring some life into the place but other than that i think me and joonie would get along really well like we would probably nag at each other about little habits that irritate us but i can't foresee anything being too serious approximate success rate: 84%

hobi's another one i feel like i couldn't live with immediately LOL like i would 100% irk his nerves jfslsls he'd be nagging me to put my clothes in the hamper, put them away, stop leaving stuff around, etc. bc like i'm soooo good at keeping common areas clean not a problem but my room? i'm just always in such a mad dash to get to the bed that i just be leaving stuff anywhere be rushing like my bed gon get up and run away if i'm not in it within 30 seconds of entering the room so it do be junky and also i'm a go with the flow person and imma be ready to take a nap and hobi gonna pop up with some furniture polish and a swiffer talking about it's dusting day and imma lose it like we just need some time before we take that step sklfksd but other than that our relationship would be perfect?? like he's end game for sure we would eventually move in together and live happily after approximate success rate: 87%

my precious baby seokjin lawd i love and miss him so much need him expeditiously oh god missing seokjin hours just hit bc i'm thinking about how perfect he would be for me 😭 like moving in general is a lot but moving to a whole nother country is something else entirely and i think he'd just be so kind and thoughtful about the whole thing like i feel like he'd already have me a room in his place cleared out??? and would just give me a whole lot of space to just exist like helping me unpack and decorate however i like however long it takes not crowding around me when i'm overwhelmed letting me invade his space when i'm feeling clingy cooking me meals like he just seems like he'd try his very very best to make sure i'm comfortable and having fun the entire time like i'm sorry this is just my man and we're meant to be <333 approximate success rate: 95%

jimin is so caring and so sweet and i love that about him but that might be the thing that drive me up the wall like his care might just be a little overbearing for me and like i’d be his girl he tryna make sure i’m straight but if i say i’m good i’m good even if i’m not like imma need a minute and he not gonna wanna give it to me gonna wanna talk about everything all the time but imma need time to process everything before talking about anything and he might not get that at first so there would be some tension but after we’re able to align my introversion with his extroversion everything would be great and i think he’d accept my mess and i’d accept his and then we would get tired of being messy and push each other to be better i also can see a lot of cuddling and watching youtube on tv approximate success rate: 78%

finally there’s yoongi my twin flame <333 with him we'd probably already have a discussion about living together simply bc it's more convenient and economical to do so but the relationship...... it's like we might as well have not met online LOL like it'll be soooo awkward at first like it's gon take 3-4 weeks to really warm up to each other in person like he'll cook me breakfast and then when i sit down to eat with him he just not gonna look me in the eyes and i'll just be trying my best to be quiet and out of the way trying not to be seen or heard so he won't throw me away and then literally just one day it'll click we'll be like what are we doing and why and then all of a sudden we kissing cuddling he's taking me to his studio arm wrapped around my waist like we gonna go from being acquaintances to having old married couple vibes overnight and honestly i'm here for that comfort and familiarity the only thing i can see being a problem is that ion like to initiate conflict like if u start it imma finish but i ain't throwing the first punch but he seems to be more mature than me in that aspect so as long as he helps me to keep a line of communication open i can't see a reason why we would ever break up approximate success rate: 93%

sorry for using ur question as a catalyst for my delusion

#ask #bts fanfic #bts headcanons #bts imagines #bts x reader #ask of interest #it's crazy how confident i am that i could sustain a relationship with any member much less a solid 4/7 #especially considering how unbearable my personality is #but that unwarranted confidence is all part of my charm

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beautifullyboldphotography · 1 year

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#happynudeyear everyone!!

Some things I'm looking forward to for the coming year:

>>A new camera! I'm planning to purchase it early 2023. I've been back and forth on sticking with DSLR or finally take the plunge to get a mirrorless camera. I think I am going to take that plunge

>>Starting a new job with a steady income. This will help me financially with a new camera, as well as save for a studio for my photography business. Outdoor shoots are the bomb, but in the wintertime, few peeps wanna be out freezing their bits off 🥶🥶

>>Trip planning!! I love that my gf (fiancee?? We aren't really into that word since we got engaged haha) loves to travel! I would love to be a traveling photographer when I'm not at home with a studio. We are in the works with an NYC trip for fall of 2023 as well as someplace warm in March (Cuba maybe??). I also want to book some trips closer to home too that involve meeting up for shoots!

>>More shoots (both paid client work and artsy, creative work) and meeting new peeps! 2022 I met some awesome people and reconnected with others. Hoping 2023 is more of the same!

Some changes/new habits I want to create:

>>Slight name change/modifications to my business. More deets to come!

>>More vids/BTS/reels in my stories. Get to know me, and my work process, a bit better.

>>Black and White photography. I like when I strip colour from a photo sometimes, but working in monochrome to begin with will make it easier for me to spot good photo ideas

>>Starting a new series (or 2?) I'm definitely really excited for one I'm starting soon!

>>Having an exhibition of some kind with my work in it

I am super grateful to all who support me and like my work either just this past year or have been here from the beginning. Thank you for following me and double tapping the occasional post or two ☺️☺️ I love what I do! I love helping people! I love making a positive impact in people's lives! It makes me feel good and want to do it more. I love making cool art! I love making art period! I love bringing people's ideas to life! All these things bring me joy and I want to continue to do them this year and beyond!

Model Credit: @forbiddenfairychild

#beautifullybold #beautifullyboldboudoir #frederictonboudoir #frederictonphotographer #korryhillphotography #instagood #photooftheday #picoftheday #instamood #agameoftones #happy #inspiration #love #loveyourself #positivevibes #amazing #beautiful #beauty #empowering #empowerment #strong #allbodiesarebeautiful #sundayvibes #weekendvibes #chillvibes #happynewyear #newyear #happyholidays #snowshoot

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phoenixtakaramono · 6 months

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2, 12, 26

Re: Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you for the Ask, anon! So sorry it’s taken awhile to respond but finally I’m on a brief break from writing so I can finally answer this! (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)♡

I do have to give everyone a warning. After Question 2, I do get a bit nitpicky and kinda specific of what I personally do not like. Please don’t take offense, luvs. <3

2) Go to your AO3 “Works” page, to the sidebar with all the filters, and click the drop-down arrow for “Additional Tags.” What are your top 3-5 most used tags? Do you think they accurately represent your writing habits?

I had to lol a bit looking at them. So disregarding the Fanart and Illustrations tags (I usually make a cover art for my long fics), what we’re looking at are:

Developing Relationship: You’re talking to a slowburn romance writer. By nature, I am also very much demisexual irl. And I am an avid consumer of light novels and danmei where 100-300 chapters in, they finally hold hands or kiss, and I have to scream into a pillow and kick my feet in delight upon reading it (the number is an exaggerated hyberbole, haha, but you get the gist). It’s the developing relationship that makes the experience special imo so I like to spend more time and effort showing how these characters can come to fall in love with each other in my own works.

Possessive Behavior: So, irl, I would hate this. Dear lord, I would run for the hills if a man showed an ounce of possessiveness and has essentially revolved their life around me to a disturbing degree (it’s not cute being love-bombed and isolated from friends and family, etc). But since this is fictional and the love interests tend to be canonical d*ckheads whereby possessiveness is very much in-character for them, and especially if it’s for a dark fic, I will serve you psychotic yanderes or clingy, obsessive Male Leads who love only the Main Character and would end the world just for them. I am so used to wholesome healthy cookie-cutter relationships irl, so I like to explore the opposite in fiction.

S*xual Tension: Same as the developing relationship. I mean, yes, I can write the NS/FWs and can churn them out with a straight face, but it’s usually not the focus of my works. It’s the s*xual tension where it’s at. I wanna see chemistry. I wanna see it sizzle. I want to see them pine. When I write a romance, I want to make it clear from the start how well-matched these two characters are for each other and, why, yes, you should continue to read my super ultra long fic if you want to see how I will make them kiss and make love to each other.

Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence: Alright, this one is especially indicative of my writing habits and the stories I tend to write, aka Post-Canon AUs. It’s very much What-If scenarios that keep me up at night and inspire me to write what you read. I don’t think there exists a fic of mine which is not either an AU or an AU - Canon Divergence. For me, after I finish a source material, usually I want to see a continuation of the same characters—with their core essence and personality kept as true as possible. And that is also indicative of what I write. What I like to read myself extends to what I like to write.

Fluff: I like fluff as much as the next person, but I like it when it’s earned. When that coldhearted Love Interest who’s grown embittered gradually warms up to the Main Character and entwines their fingers to slowly bring their hands up to their face to softly plant a kiss to the back of their hand, or the Main Character who’s grown to be besotted with the Love Interest and nuzzles their face into their chest as their arms wrap around them, sharing body heat as their bodies spoon up against each other—you see what I mean? It hits better when it’s earned (when you see their journey). Since my fics tend to be long, I also like to inform my readers that, yes, there will be fluff in the story. They’re coming.

Character Study: I do use a lot of my fics as an opportunity to do a character study on some characters that fascinate me, whether it be a character introspection or their POV, etc. Some fics are more obvious think-pieces and character explorations disguised as stories. It’s exploring my love for a character, seeing what makes them tick, and condensing their essence down to mere words on a page.

Canon-Typical Violence: I’m a detail-oriented writer. 99% of the time, what I write is on the graphic end. I go lush with the sensory details and descriptions. And for the source materials with canon-typical violence, I feel obligated to include violent scenes in my own works so it feels like you’re reading an extension of the universe. I also tend to put this warning up just in case, just so readers have been forewarned.

The last tag is pretty self-explanatory I think, considering the fics I write are 🔞 queer literature between two consenting adult fictional men, haha. Nuff said.

12) Are there any tropes you used to dislike but have grown on you?

So, funny thing about me and my love-hate relationship with tropes…. In the spirit of honesty, this is a bit of a landmine to navigate for me, haha. I’d answered an Ask about this (if you do read it, skip down to the Contrarian Tendencies section), as why I tend to develop an aversion to tropes and clichés that’s affected not only what I consume as a reader but also affect the content I write. So if my brain happens to identify a pattern of tropes or clichés or popularly used words or even popular fanon nicknames for characters, I will instinctively dislike the fad 90% of the time on sight and I will go outta my way to avoid any fics/ stories/ shows/ manga/ manhua/ manhwa that even mention them—unless the creator is intentionally satirizing a classic cliché or reinvents the wheel to breathe new life into a tired trope. As an analogy, think of how fatigued some of us have become of the generic superhero movies being pumped out via DCU and MCU—and then think of how The Boys (TV) is like a breath of fresh air. It’s the execution and originality for me. I like it when there’s a clear attempt on the writer’s part to be unconventional. I love trope subversions and deconstructions. That’s kinda how my brain operates with tropes. I can’t exactly explain why my instinctive aversion to fads exists for me. It’s probably the predictability/ unoriginality and sensing a popular fad that kills it for me. It might be because as much as I am a bibliophile (person who loves reading books), I only have a limited amount of free time and don’t like to spend it on something that’s completely unoriginal with the usual tropes that come with the premise/ genre which comes across like beating a dead horse with a stick to me, and it shows me that the writer has put little to no effort into trying to come up with something new. So unless it’s intentional or satire, it’s pretty much become a compulsion for me to dislike clichés, fads, and generic cookie-cutter writing on sight.

This is just me though! It’s not a measure of what I think a writer’s skill or creativity is! I’m just an eccentric contrarian with hipster tendencies, haha. I just typically don’t like following trends in writing, and prefer to pave my own path to do my own thing. This aversion is similar to how I am as a writer. As an example on the smaller level, while not a trope, sometimes in fandoms I see a character affectionately being given non-canonical nicknames. For me…if I see it, chances are I will likely just drop the fic I’ve been reading, no matter how well-written it is and how amazing the plot and characterizations are. If I think a nickname has overstayed its welcome, I have reached a point where I won’t even come ten feet of it in my own stories. When it has reached that level of nausea for me, I have essentially developed an allergy to the nickname—that if I see it in any other franchise I have yet to check out but know that name exists for a character, I will avoid that other fandom like a plague just so there’s no cross-contamination of my writing or reading material. (So I’m not gonna name names because I don’t want writers to think I’m calling anyone out—because this aversion is only specific to me and is not a metric of the true quality of a writer’s work—but as a general example, it’s one of the reasons why I don’t like “Johnny” being used for a certain character in The Boys that have shown up a handful of times across various authors’ works already—because my brain associates that with another well-known character from CoD (🧼) who coincidentally shares the same first name (John) who also canonically has a certain nickname they’re known by (Johnny)—and what a funny coincidence that it’s the same as their nickname for a character I’m reading about in this different fandom. It could be very well that it’s cute so that’s maybe why some writers use it (which, I have to say this: don’t let me stop you; it’s your fic so do whatever you want; I encourage you to continue so in fact; this is just me being nitpicky to a fault) but there are writers I know who are in the CoD franchise as well as The Boys. So I just cannot remove the association my brain has made and that’s personally why it’s not my cuppa tea.)

“A-Yuan” is a good example, for the character Shen Yuan from SVSSS, where I saw it everywhere in the fics I read, disliked the fad because my brain strongly associated “A-Yuan” with a character from MXTX’s other work, MDZS, so it was incredibly jarring to me on principle, but over the years—and especially engagement with my cute readers—it has grown on me. A-Yuan though is probably the one exception I’ve made so far where I will read works with that fanon nickname while also include it in my own work myself. No other fanon character nicknames for other fandoms so far have pierced through the barrier of my initial dislike to the other side. If you ask me for reasons of how this manifests for me, it can differ. 1) It’s too cutesy and can be immersion-breaking if it’s not done right or if it’s out-of-character (especially if no one would call them that in the source material). Or 2) the nickname reminds me of another character from a different franchise, which makes me feel like I’m reading about an entirely different character from that franchise than the character I want to be reading about. Or 3) it makes me feel like I’m reading about a writer’s Original Character and not the actual character I’d wanted to read about so I feel like I’ve been misled by unintentional false advertisement. Other examples are (in no particular order of which fandoms they come from): Hanni, Dray/ Drake, Johnny, Tommy, Sesshy, Sev, Jimmy, BeiBei…I could go on but I already feel my soul has shriveled just mentioning these. In my opinion, just a made-up fanon nickname or petname being mentioned once or twice or a handful of times is okay, or if it’s said mockingly or if it’s like an earned thing to show relationship growth, but dear lord if that cutesy nickname has replaced the actual character’s first name for, like, 90% of a fic and has become their go-to. This also applies for Original Works. If I have to read a character calling someone by something corny like “Little One,” “Goddess,” “little lamb,” “cub,” or “kitten” for the 3,000th time in the same work and it’s not the writer trying to be ironic or funny, I will take a fork to my eyes.

As for actual disliked tropes that have grown on me…gosh, there are none. None, zilch, nada. It’s either A) I dislike it wholeheartedly and will go out of my way to avoid my pet peeves, or B) I like something and will continue to read 100 iterations of it because everyone does it differently so it’s refreshing to see everyone’s different take (I will read any dark fics revolving around a villain or antihero or hero-turned-ruthless with a scheming mind and twisted motives; I eat that up for breakfast, lunch, and dinner and will love it till I’m in my 90s or buried in my grave). There’s no coming back once I’ve become fatigued by something. And if I have come to dislike something, I will loathe it with every fiber of my being and nothing can convince me otherwise once I have put it on my Do Not Like list. We’re talking about tropes I find insufferable like unnecessary miscommunication/ misunderstandings leading to a fall-out/ unnecessary poor communication leading to unnecessary drama, fake-out deaths (if not done right), love triangles (if not done right), damsel in distress (if not done right), unnecessary and undeserved character assassination character bashing to make way for a ship, etc. Now can there be exceptions to this? Yes. God, yes, they exist. But these are the tropes I rarely see executed well. And if it’s not executed well, it grinds everything to a screeching halt for me and I notice its existence even more. I will however make a strong attempt to persevere and patiently read on despite so in hopes that it gets better to see what the hullabaloo is all about, but even I have my limits for how long I can keep holding on.

26) Would you rather write a fic that had no dialogue or one that was only dialogue?

First of all, why? Hahaha. Secondly, I guess I’m going to be nitpicky here as well. So unless it’s a satirical fic where there’s only one character (lmao, y’all recall that infamous Groot masterpiece?), I would rather write a fic that had no dialogue because at least I can differentiate everyone’s introspection and thoughts, interspersed with descriptions and other storytelling elements. Maybe instead of dialogue, they communicate via telepathy or body language. I’dunno, but it’s certainly more flexible. It’s just a small pet peeve of mine where I read a story where there’s a large chunk of dialogue—but I have absolutely no clue who’s speaking. It’s frustrating. And is a surefire way to break my reader immersion and take me outta the story.

#ask #anon #ty for the ask <3 #phoenix talks #questions for fic writers #I very much go scorched earth on things I dislike #which means I have erased it from my life and 99% will not read it or include it in my own writing #it’s even extended to words I will not use 99.9% of the time in my own writing #said words include ‘whine’ (in a 🔞 context); ‘s/he blushed’; the list goes on #you’ll notice such words are virtually almost nonexistent in my writings #I felt bad that I answered two of these questions with negativity but I am being genuine #(hopefully it’s an interesting insight into me as a writer for you!)

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naumin · 1 year

Text

2022 in review

in an effort to blog about art on my art blog more i will be writing a post covering my work in 2022 and maybe some aspirations going forward into 2023

2022 was the year of learning to paint! at the beginning i was really frustrated, a lot of my pieces were very hit or miss and i couldnt tell why some sucked and some fuckd. i nibbled at some online courses for fundamentals, James Gurney’s Color & Light book and Marco Bucci’s painting videos, and was looking for a mentor at one point but i think i stopped cuz i broke my thumb briefly lol

a piece from december 2021 that is just a bit random and i think representative of my stabbing in the dark

studying...

in June i split a schoolism sub with emma and it was an amazing decision. i think if you have limited time to practice drawing or dont know where to go the best thing is to take a course, and ive taken cheap or free courses online but the tutors on schoolism are top of the industry and the quality of their teaching is stellar imo. literally felt my brain explode with knowledge they are the best of the best. i finished the painting workout course with wouter tulp and ive dipped in and out of numerous others since then. its cool bcus u can study at your own pace.

July was artfight, i did talk about it here so not gonna repeat myself heh

then i was really busy with my MA, its been so fun and so exhausting. a year is so short and i want to try all the printing techniques and ceramics and everything cry. but hey now i know indesign and can make my own zines and stuff which is amazing. i also tabled at my first market :) i did really like it and would love to do more, dont want to put pressure on myself to do that this year but at least wanna visit them and scope out the audiences and stuff.

school really is making me appreciate traditional art again, tbh it is nothing like digital. you just cant get that chaos or physical resistance from your materials in digital, everything is very deliberate and constructed and almost predictable. ive started to incorporate more traditional work into my pieces where i can, especially photobashing. i can use photos i offhandedly took years ago and it feels really nice to get to repurpose them.

a spread from my school project, a book about one of my passions (i chose the story of how i got into elden ring!!!) i made it from paper cutting, photobashing, and digital. (im going to sell pdf and physical copies in the new year)

so circling back to the start of the year, i think you can see marked progress in my illustrations that ive posted here. i think i learned a lot about techniques within a painting but i want to learn more about pictorial composition bcus my default tends to be 3:4, portrait, charas centre, and i want to break that habit and tell more effective stories :)

over the past 2 years ive been incorporating more realism into the characters i draw and trying to be really deliberate with what features, proportions etc they have.

a 2021 isa and a 2022 isa

i think i want to maintain this level of detail because its descriptive enough for my needs but i want to push it to be more dynamic and stylised. i really admire the way disney animators like jin kim do it. its because im not confident enough with structure and anatomy to really play with it.

on the other hand with life drawing i really want to do more realism and capture exactly whats in front of me because i think i rely on style as a crutch too much hahaha.

from december. proud of these!!!

thats whats on my mind really. again really dont want to put any undue pressure on myself and i am going to be really busy until october at least. i am seriously proud of my progress in 2022. and im really looking forward to playing bloodborne x

#diary

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gavin-zephyr · 1 year

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Finally mustered up the courage to post this. First chapter of a long-form story I’ve been working on for a while. I’m not sure where else to publish this, so I figured I’d just dump it here for anyone looking for something to read.

The name of the book is “Many Mornings”, and it’s a modern fantasy about a school of kids who all learn a lot about themselves. It’s a story about identity, and discovering what it really means to be yourself. I hope you enjoy.

Chapter 1: Ladies and Gentlemen

Do you believe everything you read?

Ahem! Today... I’ll tell you the story of the school known as “Okami”. Okami was a ground for those who honed the various arts of humanity. A school to train the future leaders, defenders, and preservers of the world. Youths from all across the world were enrolled. After the students accepted enrollment the true nature of the school was revealed. Okami was indeed a school to hone talent, but also a school to train young fighters. Police reports of cult-like activity and unidentified, black creatures suddenly were being filed, almost overnight. Okami seemed to have some solution to these problems in mind. This… is the tale of that very school, and the life it sought to protect. It is a tale of kings.

Through the underground pathway, he walked. Climbing up the stairs, and out of the train station, he was accosted by a myriad of senses. The loud and busy city exuded so many sights and sounds. Sounds that even pierced through the blaring trumpets coming from his headphones. Shivering hands clenched in his pockets, he took in a deep breath through his nose. What an ever-nostalgic smell, the city air was. For a moment, nothing in the world seemed to matter; just simple ecstasy. That was, of course, until a meek breeze blew a tuft of rose-red hair into his face, tickling the bridge of the boy’s nose.

Brushing away his red threads, and pushing up his glasses, he produced a small object from his pocket: a cell phone. The boy flipped it open, shot a glance down, and returned it to his coat. Carefully, he began scanning the skyline, until he was interrupted by the exact thing he was searching for: a pair of arms wrapped themselves around his torso.

Startled, he turned completely around at the source of the hug. “There you are,” he said in a voice about a half-octave higher than one might expect. It was a girl, about a head taller than he was. She had light-brown hair that came slightly lower than her shoulders. She wore a pink cardigan, and a heavenly smile. The boy with glasses, red hair, and a high-pitched voice returned her hug, his chin perched atop her breast.

“I can’t believe it’s you, Arisato,” the girl started to well up. “It’s been so long.”

The embrace got tighter and tighter by each passing second. Though it was difficult for his lungs to create the words, the boy called ‘Arisato’ managed to reply. “I’ve missed you too, Hikaru. I’m sorry it’s been so long since you’ve seen me.” Eyes shifting over and down, a somber look wiped across his face. It was then that Arisato noticed himself tearing up as well.

“You don’t have to apologize,” Hikaru affirmed, looking him dead in the eye. “All that’s important to me is that I get to see my best friend again.” A sincere smile began to form between her blushed cheeks.

Arisato closed his eyes and mirrored her smile. “You’re right. And now that we’ll be going to school together again, you’ll be seeing a lot of me.”

Struck by urgency, Hikaru grasped her friend’s frigid hand, and sprinted back, the way she’d gotten to the station. “The dorm is only about a ten-minute walk from here,” she shouted back at her struggling friend, “but it’s almost curfew, and I’ve kind of made a habit of staying out late. I don’t wanna get in trouble.”

“She only moved into the dorm a week ago, and she already has a reputation like that?” Arisato thought to himself. “I guess she hasn’t changed much.”

“Sorry about this,” she called back. “I’ll give you a tour of the city tomorrow. I promise.”

Arisato certainly would have liked to have been able to take in the sights a little more, but it could wait. It was late, it was cold, he was tired, and he knew that this was the first day of the rest of his life. In only two days, he and his best friend were going to be students at Okami Academy. It was nothing short of an honor to be accepted into a school like that. It was something straight out of a story that Arisato would read.

Though, thoughts of doubt raced through his head. “Am I really worthy? Isn’t this a little dangerous?”

He clenched his friend’s hand and was instantly soothed by her smile. He was reassured, if not a little jealous of her. “She’s the most fearless girl I know. She’s not scared of anything. She’s so perfect.”

As soon as he’d forgotten about running, once his legs began moving to their own beat, Hikaru skidded to a halt right outside of a large building. Hedges, concealed by a metal fence, circled the perimeter of the building. Incandescent, yellow lights illuminated the spotless, slate-gray, stairs. At the top of the stairs resided a large double door, and on the red bricks next to these doors lived a bronze plaque with two words: “Aoisumire Dormitory.”

“Here it is.” Hikaru motioned toward the building. “Your new home.”

Arisato felt a well of nervousness form in his stomach. Choosing to ignore it, he joined his friend up the stairs before them. Stepping through the threshold, he was accosted by the lighted room.

Surveying the first room, it appeared to be a lounge. A green and red carpet lined the floor, and immediately to the right sat several chairs and a couch circling a long coffee table, with a television nearby. On the left, a receptionist’s desk was set up, being manned by a young, caucasian lady. She was either of American or European descent; Arisato could never tell the difference.

“Ms. Yuri,” the receptionist began, brandishing a look of annoyance, “you’re late, again.” Hikaru nervously smiled.

“Yeah, I know,” she chuckled. “But I had to pick him up from the station. He would’ve gotten lost without me.”

“What a liar. They gave me a map of the city.” Arisato thought.

“I suppose I can let this one slide, but don’t let me catch you late again, Ms. Yuri.” The receptionist turned toward Arisato. “You must be new to the dorms. May I have your name?”

“Um, Arisato.” He spoke up.

“Let’s see. Sousuke Arisato, correct?”

Arisato nodded to the woman.

“Well,” the receptionist began, “lucky for us, we have a room with exactly one empty bed.” She handed him a silver key with the number 128 engraved into it. “On the next floor up, there should be a room with that same number on your key. All of the boys’ rooms are on that floor, with the girls’ rooms on the floor above. It goes without saying, but the boys are not allowed in the girls’ dorm rooms, and vice-versa. We have your suitcase in the luggage room, which is the first door on the left on the next floor. Apart from all that, all I really have to say is to please try to get along with your roommates.”

“Thank you.” Arisato bowed, only mostly sure that all the information he had been given hadn’t just gone out the other ear.

“Oh, I nearly forgot,” the lady added. “Your first day of school is Monday, so tomorrow is your last day to pick up your uniform. And the same goes for you, Ms. Yuri.”

Hikaru smiled, sheepishly.

“I’ll make sure not to forget.” Arisato assured the woman at the counter, before bowing even lower than before. “Thank you again, ma’am.”

“Of course, Mr. Arisato. Have a good night, both of you.”

The two of them bid her goodbye and headed up the stairwell. Arisato wished his friend a good night before she ascended to the next floor. Following the directions he was told, he opened the door to the luggage room, and was greeted with a brand-new suitcase: the same suitcase he’d packed only a day-or-two ago before having it shipped away.

Clutching the suitcase’s handle, Arisato walked to the room marked 128. At the end of the hall, he found this exact door. Inserting the key, he opened the door to be greeted by three other boys.

Two of the boys sat next to each other on the bottom of one of the two bunk beds in the room. The boy on the left of the bunk was the first to speak up, almost instantly.

“Hi there!” He exclaimed. The boy had lightly-tanned skin, and ruffled, dark-brown hair. He was short enough that his legs dangled over the floor, and he had the widest pair of eyes that Arisato had ever seen.

“Oh, it’s nice to meet you.” Arisato replied.

“My name is Sun. Looks like you’re our last roommate.” This boy’s optimism was incredibly off-putting. Almost scary.

The boy on the right couldn’t have looked any different. He was tall, and very pale. His hair was groomed and a black color, darker than midnight. The most noticeable thing about him though was a long, yellow scarf wrapped around his neck. He almost looked like a character from a comic.

“And I’m Ray. It’s a pleasure,” stated the taller boy.

“My name is S-Sousuke Arisato. But most people just call me by my surname.”

Sun began speaking again. “Ray and I already decided on this bunk, so it looks like you’ll be sharing a bed with Gordon.” Arisato looked over to the other bed in the room. On the bottom bunk lay a boy with long, brown hair playing a handheld video game.

“Since we’re introducing ourselves,” he began, “I would be the Gordon in question.” Finally. Someone who looked remotely normal. However, Arisato quickly realized that with his thick-rimmed glasses and rose-red hair, he didn’t look exactly normal either.

Arisato set his suitcase on the carpeted floor before ascending the ladder to survey his new bed. He sat down on the mattress and was completely dumbfounded by how it felt. It was the most comfortable thing he’d sat on in years. And the sheets smelled just as beautiful as the mattress felt.

“This has to be a dream, right? Nothing in this world could possibly be this perfect.”

Arisato’s ecstasy was short-lived though. He was interrupted by a voice. “Is everything OK up there?” It was Ray’s voice.

Without realizing it, Arisato had somehow managed to entangle himself in his bedsheets in an act of bliss. And everyone had witnessed.

“Um, yeah. I’m sorry. I just-I wasn’t expecting it to be this comfy.” Arisato said, his face as red as his hair. “God, what a first impression.” he thought.

“Hey,” Ray chuckled, “quit blushing. No one’s upset. You must be tired. It is late after all. It’s probably close to bedtime” He spoke in such a silky manner. It was almost intimidating, but not quite malicious. Somewhere in-between.

Arisato began to lie down when he realized that he’d never changed out of his clothes. He rappelled down the ladder on his bed, before grabbing his suitcase, and starting towards the bathroom. Turning on the lights, and closing the bathroom door, he looked at himself in the mirror before disrobing.

He unbuttoned his shirt before glancing at the mirror again. He saw himself, standing alone, shirtless. His chest was not bare though; around his torso was a series of bindings. Bindings that concealed the body of a woman: Arisato’s true body.

#my wrtitng #my story #original writing #original story #original fiction #fiction #original work #my book #many mornings #fantasy #modern fantasy #high school fantasy

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askauradonprep · 2 years

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Uhh, you mentioned in a post a while back - like, 25 march 2021? ish? (lol, not me going through all your posts ever) - that you've accidentally joined cults before, and I wanted to ask about the signs? Since, as far as I'm aware, no one in my family has been in one and I want to know what to avoid/be wary of? Because I DO want to keep myself, my family and my friend safe from anything I can, so any infor/help would be appreciated!

Okay, first of all, never 'not' about going through my posts. I love when people do that! Even aside from the 'happy chemical boost', I like seeing what you guys enjoy when I post. The reason I have fifteen million posts about Huma is because people liked and reblogged those posts and that spurred more head canon creation. Engage with the posts you wanna see on my blog.

Now, for the actual reason you wrote -

I'm gonna start by saying my experience with cults are probably not the kind you're thinking of. One was when I was like...six. My babysitter was telling my mom and posting flyers at school about an art camp that rented a room at her church. Well, surprise, turned out to be a cult that brought us to the auditorium and lit fires and made us sing hymns and come and pray in front of the fire before they brought us back like five minutes before pick up time and gave us 'crafts' like 'dump glitter on a rock so you can tell your parents you did art today'. Well, I was TERRIFIED of fire and so I was extremely quiet when I got home. My mom noticed and my friend told her what happened at camp. She LOST IT. So did our school principal actually - he was going around tearing down flyers himself the next day. My poor babysitter was horrified - this wasn't her actual church putting on the camp, just some group that rented the room and she had no idea what was going to happen. So that was cult number one.

The next one was secular and primarily online but it was still abusive and harmful like, say, Scientology. People still have some lingering health problems from shit the leader made them do. I'm being vague on the details because the leader's still around and is known to trawl online to find mentions of himself or his cults and I'd really rather he not know who I am. I was only there for a month or two before I realized the group wasn't what I thought it was (it presented itself as a fan-space with a lot of the cult stuff happening behind 'closed doors' so to speak. I wasn't privy to a lot of that but I saw the effects on everyone else and it tipped my 'y'all are weird' alarms).

One of my friends is also a cult survivor and this is the test she uses. It was originally based around harmful Alcoholics Anonymous practices, but it's useful for identifying habits in a cult. https://www.orange-papers.mx/orange-cult_q0.html

Take Back Your Life: Recovering from Cults and Abusive Relationships by Janja Lalich and Madeline Tobias is pretty good too, according to her.

Also - Leah Remini. Look into what she says about Scientology. LOTS of good stuff about escaping scary, no shit, 'people who try to leave disappear sometimes' cults.

Now, MY advice?

Is there a leader of a defined group who is either somehow Specially Capable, whether it's a divine connection, psychic abilities, or just really really profound Super Duper Special insight into people? Are they always always right and they (or their followers) get super defensive if they're questioned or caught out lying? Red flag.

Are you free to leave the group without there being totally unreasonable responses like being treated as a totally horrible person forever or losing your whole community? If not, that too is a red flag.

LOTS AND LOTS of abuse tactics like gaslighting, 'bread crumbs' where they drop little hints and lay groundwork for believing things (like say, talking about believing in the possibility of life on other planets (something lots of reasonable people believe in) and talking a lot about New Age stuff people believe and slowly ramping up 'coincidences' until the target takes the risk of going 'OMG you're an alien'. This is how you get cults believing their leader is a Divine Alien. "Well I'd never believe that" - Well, sure, probably not at first. Give it a couple months getting softened and softened up until YOU take the risk of sounding like a weirdo instead of the leader), emotional abuse, intentionally putting you in dangerous or emotionally heightened situation with no warning so you're easier to control, lots of wearing down self esteem, sabotaging other relationships, isolation, 'us against the world' crap, etc.

BRAINWASHING TECHNIQUES. Sleep deprivation is really common, especially if the leader and others get crabby if you try to get a break and go to bed. Even if they're not though, they might still be trying to keep you awake as much as possible so you're less likely to think through the lies (and there's ALWAYS lies upon lies upon lies - or at least bullshit upon bullshit upon bullshit, in the event the leader really believes their own Kool-Aid.). Again, isolation, absolute obedience, some sort of punishment for failing like physical abuse or isolation, etc. If they can use their worldview or framework to totally reframe your identity on their terms, that's one way they can do it (like if you complain about sleep deprivation and they go 'Oh, don't worry, it's normal for aliens, you'll adjust eventually'. Y'know, because you found them as an alien so you're totally one too, you Cool and Clever so and so. Oh but don't tell anybody else outside the group or you'll end up in a lab somewhere). LOTS AND LOTS of guilt trips and again, gaslighting. This isn't all of the tricks but they're the ones I'm thinking of off the top of my head.

Whataboutism - like, sure, I burned half your stuff when you fell asleep on me, but I didn't hit you so this TOTALLY isn't a cult. Or, hey, I don't make you pray, just ~meditate~ so it's not a cult. Those religious ones, they're the cult.

They always always always need more from you for the group. More money, more time, more devotion, etc. Nothing's ever good enough. Oh, but if the leader gets bored of you and moves onto someone else and pushes you away, it just sucks to suck. Never mind the fact they've trained you to build your life and self worth around them. Again, sucks to suck.

EVERYTHING has to be on the leader's terms. It's the Leader Show, all the fucking time.

If all of this is sounding like 'abuse, but make it religious/otherwise small, enclosed group dynamics', then ding ding ding! We have a winner. You're absolutely right.

If you're reading this and going 'oh my god, I think I might be in a cult', first - try not to beat yourself up. You're NEVER too smart/savvy/mean/untrusting/etc. to get snowed. In fact, the more you believe that, the more susceptible you are. Arrogance is absolutely a vulnerability cult leaders use too. Next, try to figure out ways to build up resources to GET OUT. If the cult leader and your other members do not live with you, this is a lot easier. If not, try to look into Leah Remini or others who've escaped cults and see what they did. I specify Leah Remini and other Scientologists because even among cults, Scientology is NOTORIOUSLY hard and dangerous to leave. You basically need a lawyer to do it. They'll have a lot more advice than I will. The general 'leaving an abusive house' tips stand - try to squirrel away money, important documents, anything you can't stand to lose or leave behind because it might not be possible to get it back once you leave. Don't tell anyone ahead of time you're leaving. Try to find a therapist with cult deprogramming experience. I'm sorry, I don't have many specific tips here. Due to the nature of the cults I was in, I never had much difficulty leaving. My friend who left was basically taken home by her mother "just for a few days" and by the time those days were over, she was ready to leave and told the leader she wasn't coming back. She'd already taken most, if not all, her meaningful possessions with her (and the leader was living with people who weren't in the cult so they could always help her get any other personal items back via mail or whatever).

If someone you love is in a cult, try to follow the 'friend in an abusive relationship' playbook. Voice your concerns gently and carefully, don't argue when they push back, and try to be there for them as much as you can. Cult leaders THRIVE on isolating their followers so it's crucial not to let them cut you off from your loved one as much as is possible. Recognize there will be times you're mad at your loved one or burned out, but try to keep present as much as you can. Don't call the police unless it's EXTREME MEASURES time like they're in actual, physical danger. When you're with your loved one, try to provide them as much autonomy and support for their self worth as you can. Ultimately, your loved one will have to realize the cult is a problem on their own. Sometimes the bullshit builds so much you get to the point you just....cannot swallow one more piece of it and the next bit blows it all down. That's when you really need to be there.

Again, I'm not an expert here and I've never had to leave from somewhere imminently physically dangerous, so if you'd like, here are some more resources: https://www.goodreads.com/list/tag/cults. I particularly recommend the cult survivors list.

https://freedomofmind.com/cult-mind-control/bite-model/ - The BITE model is great too.

And above all remember that not all cults are mystical, and not all of them are religious. A lot of them front like fan pages or multi-level marketing schemes (LOOKING AT *YOU* DOTERRA) so just...keep your eyes open.

#not descendants #cults

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