#laundry. bathroom. baking. grocery.

[bigcats-birds-and-books]

so....ignoring the fact that it took me three (3) weeks to get through um. twenty-six (26) pages. it's totally reasonable to try to speedrun revisions of the next thirty-two (32) in like six (6) hours tomorrow, right, Asking For A Friend,

[bowtiepasta]

mattsun brushes your teeth for you because your hands are too shaky after a night out.

he’s kneeling on the tiled floor in front of the toilet where you’re slouched, arms limp at your sides, mascara smudged and socks mismatched: one his (a blue crew sock with a faded marvel logo) and one yours (fuzzy white crusted with what might be salsa). 

“open your mouth,” he laughs, gentle. this is normal.

his knuckles are nicked — from volleyball, probably — and there’s still a smudge of ink on the side of his hand from the grocery list you made him write on his way out yesterday.

you do as you’re told, reluctantly. “this is humiliating,” you say, though your voice wobbles from both the hangover and the fact that your legs still feel like noodles. “I can brush my own teeth, y’know.”

“you missed your mouth twice,” he shakes his head, leaning in. the tip of his tongue pokes out while he concentrates on not jabbing your gums. “it was either this or a straw in mouthwash and hope for the best.”

you scrunch your nose. “you say it like it’s a bad idea.”

“oh yeah, totally safe. nothing screams oral hygiene like listerine chugging.”

you groan, “it’s called innovation, jackass. you wouldn’t get it. you’re-”

“a coward, yes, I remember,” he finishes for you. you kick his shin and he hisses, catching your calf in his hand and holding your ankle hostage.

he’s being too careful, taking slow little swipes like your mouth is made of tissue paper. you stare up at him through lidded eyes, and you swear the bathroom light will blind you if you don’t move, but you still don’t.

he hums after a second, “never thought I’d be brushing my roommate’s teeth at 2 AM on a sunday morning.”

“you volunteered,” you mumble through the foam.

his hoodie sleeve keeps brushing against the wet part of the sink — the one you stole out of his laundry pile and are now swimming in.

he taps your cheek lightly with the toothbrush. “because you gave me that kicked puppy look. weaponized incompetence. I’m not immune.”

you go to say something back — probably something stupid and flirty you’ll regret tomorrow — but instead you shift enough to chomp down lightly on his finger when it strays too close.

“ow,” he says, mostly surprise. he pulls his hand back and wipes it on a towel with unnecessary dramatics. “did you just bite me?”

you grin, toothpaste trailing the corner of your lip. “just checking if you’re real. or if you’re a sexy nurse I’m dreaming about in my r.e.m. sleep.”

“god, you’re annoying when you’re hungover.”

“well you’re being too nice. it’s misleading.”

something about that makes him pause. you can feel the shift in the air, even with minty spit threatening to dribble down your chin. he leans against the sink, watching you the way he does when you’re cooking with headphones on and don’t notice — like you’re something soft, fragile, important.

“I’m not nice to everyone,” he says.

the the whirr of your shared heater kicks on in the hall — the kind that always rattles, even after you both tried stuffing old clothes in the vent.

you spit, rinse. his toothbrush rests in your cup now, next to yours like it belongs there.

“I’m gonna remember this,” you say, wiping your mouth on his sleeve. “next time you leave your dishes in the sink.”

“mm,” he coos. “next time you’re too drunk to walk home, I’m gonna make you swish with baking soda and call it a spa day.”

you’re both smiling now. both too aware of how close you still are. neither of you move.

you say a quiet thanks, mattsun.

and he says, “anytime,” absolutely means it — and maybe hopes there will be a next time.

@bouqette 🥱

[redfoxwritesstuff]

A Misdemeanor Of The Heart: Chapter 53 (Human Alastor x Married Reader)

CW: Domestic Al, Drug addiction  AN: We're less than one month away from MisD's birthday! Can you believe it?! Get your party hats ready and stay tuned for details! Prev__ Welcome Post__ AO3__ KoFi Want a bonus chapter on Wednesday? Unlock it via KoFi updates! More information here

The radio played as you danced around the kitchen, swaying to the rich horns and the piano cords. Bread baked in the hot oven while you busied yourself with spreading spices over the chicken thighs on the workspace. It wasn’t much, but it was a blessing to have any fresh meat with how Laurence had been controlling the money. 

Laurence hadn’t given you enough money for the groceries, not nearly enough to get any meat, but Alastor purchased the chicken for you. The thighs were not big or meaty, but they were better than nothing.

Warm arms wrapped around you, holding you to a firm chest you knew belonged to Alastor. If someone asked you before, you would have said it was silly to think you could identify a man by the feel of his chest pressed against your back. You knew better, now.

 He held you in a way that your husband never did. You melted into his touch as he ran his hands up your sides, pressure firm, but not so much as to cause pain from the bruises. He held you in a way that promised to support you, to hold you tight, and to cherish you. 

“I brought in the laundry on my way,” Alastor whispered in your ear. 

For a moment, you thought it was mad how attractive that statement was. The simple fact that Alastor took part in the household care made you want him even more. That wasn’t something women talked about, not even in those books they were shamed for reading. It didn’t matter to you that it wasn’t his household he was taking part of the care of. 

“Thank you.” 

“The bread smells amazing,” Alastor placed a soft kiss on your shoulder as he held you, watching your fingers massage the seasonings and oil into the meat. “Have you made up the bed yet?” 

“Not yet,” you said as you turned, placing a kiss on Alastor’s cheek but being mindful not to touch him with your dirty hands. 

“I’ll sweep while you finish up here. Then I’ll make up the bed for you.” 

“Alastor!” you protested, feeling helpless as your hands were covered in slimy oil, preventing you from reaching out for the man stepping away from you. “I can do it, really!”

“You can,” Alastor said, leaning forward and placing a kiss on your nose before stepping back again, “but I can too!” 

You groaned, stomping your foot dramatically as he just laughed at you. This was what your life could be, you thought, as he grabbed the broom from the closet. This was what your life would be like. It was just a matter of time until this was more than a game of pretend. 

Alastor hummed as he made his way up the stairs. You couldn’t help but rush to the sink, washing the oil and seasonings from your hands. There was no reason to rush but knowing what was coming, you wanted to spend every minute of time you could with Alastor. 

After drying your hands, you climbed the stairs slowly, walking on the toes of your shoes. Your steps were light as you tried to avoid the steps that squeaked, though not always as successful as you wanted. 

You were eager to try your hand at sneaking up on Alastor. He was so easily able to move through your house without making a sound. It looked easy as he did it and yet you couldn’t stop some boards from squeaking as you walked. 

As you walked down the hall, you passed the dustpan, dust swept neatly inside it with the broom leaning next to it. Alastor had done as he said, sweeping up the upper floor for you. Following the sound of his voice into the bathroom, you crept into the small room. 

Alastor stood with his back to you as he worked the wet rag in his hand along the tile, washing away the layer of grime that had accumulated over the last few days. He had his sleeves rolled up, exposing his tanned forearms. The sight of them had your breath catching in your chest for a moment before you stepped forward, wrapping your arms around his torso as he often would do to you.

“Oh no,” Alastor said, chuckle covering his poor attempt to feign shock. “I’ve been captured.” 

“Yes, you have.” You were far too short to kiss the back of his neck like you wanted to, instead you had to settle for kissing his back, between his shoulder blades. “I’ve captured you and you’re all mine.” 

“I am,” Alastor said as he wrang the water out of the rag. Once he was sure it wouldn’t drip on you, he turned in your arms, wrapping his arms around you as best he could without smearing his wet forearms on your dress. “You’ve throughly captured me before I realized it.”

You nuzzled into his chest, taking a moment to just allow yourself the comfort of being held. The scent of him wrapped around you, just like his arms did. You knew what it felt like to fall asleep wrapped in his arms, but what would it be like for that to be your normal? 

“Why don’t you go get the bed made up and I’ll finish up in here? After, we can cuddle up on the couch and maybe you’ll let me read to you from your book?” Alastor nuzzled your nose with the tip of his nose, drawing a soft giggle from your lips. It was his favorite sound… well, one of them.

“You would do that for me?” you asked, standing on your tiptoes but only able to manage asking for a kiss with his considerable height. 

“In a heartbeat,” Alastor said. “When you’re my wife, I’ll read to you every day should you wish.” 

“Will I get to be your wife?” you asked, hope blooming in your chest. 

Alastor often said that this thing between you wouldn’t wilt in the sun. Each time he spoke of a time after the shadow of Laurence was cast from your life, it felt more like children’s hopes and dreams than a future you could have. Until you acted, it would only be hopes and dreams. It was up to you to make it a reality. 

“I would hope so,” Alastor said, placing a chaste kiss on your lips. “But we will have all the time in the world for you to decide if that’s what you want.” 

 “I-” Alastor kissed you again, cutting your words off as he was so prone to doing. 

“Will be able to decide your future when you’re free from your present,” Alastor said. “Now go get that bed made so we can get comfortable.” 

“Alright,” you agreed, laughing lightly as his smile lit up his face. 

Laurence paced the ornate sitting room, waiting. It felt like his mind would separate out of his body if he stayed too long. He was running out of time and running out of options. 

“Laurence, dear!” His face lit up at the sound of the warm voice that he knew so well.

“Mother!” He wrapped the elderly woman in his arms, placing a kiss on the side of her cheek. “It’s been too long.” 

“Indeed, it has.” She wanted to be pleased to see her son. She had loved him dearly, but his visits increasingly brought trepidation. “Do you bring news? Is your lovely wife finally with child?” 

Laurence laughed, motioning for his mother to take him into the sitting room. “No, no! Not at all. We’re waiting still.” 

“Is she barren?” The kindly old woman asked as she settled into a chair across from her son. 

“No troubles like that,” Laurence assured his mother, waving the question away with a too wide grin, though he suspected his wife was indeed barren. Saying such to his mother wouldn’t help his case right now. “We’re just waiting for my luck to change. We’ll be making you a grandmother before you know it.” 

“Laurence,” his mother leaned back in the chair, straightening her aging spine, “what is it you’re here for?”

Before the watchful eyes of his mother, Laurence rung his hands. She never failed to make him feel small, like a child once again. “I… I’m in a bit of a bind.” He hesitated for when his mother’s smile turned sour, as if his words somehow shoved a lemon slice into her mouth. 

“I’ve heard about the struggles the business is facing.” Her voice was colder now. 

“It’s from no fault of mine,” Laurence was quick to offer reassurance. 

“Laurence, it’s your father’s legacy, but it’s your business now. No matter the reason, at the end of the day, it is always your fault.” 

“Ma,” he choked on the word. She hadn’t let him call her that since he was a boy. “Mother, I just- I just need a little help. I can pay it back. I will pay it back.”

“It was wonderful to see you, but I’m expected at the Garden Society’s fundraiser. She stood, looking down at her son. He had shown so much promise in his youth, yet as he had grown into a man, he wasted it. He disgusted her. “It’s time that you leave.” 

The doorman stepped forward from where he had been lurking, as he always did, holding out a hand in direction, ready to usher the unruly heir away. 

“Please, Mother.” Laurence pleaded as he stood. “Just a few coins? For fuel? I- I don’t have enough to make it all the way back home.”

“I have no more money for you, Laurence. This family has given you enough. I will always love you, but it is time for you to leave. It is time for you to stand on your own two feet. Goodbye, Laurence.” 

The car had gotten him almost back before it sputtered and died. Thankfully, there was just enough momentum to pull onto the side of the road and park. As soon as the car stopped and was thrown into park, Laurence slammed the palms of his hands down on the wheel. 

He screamed, slamming his hands down again and again. People looked, but he didn’t care, not at first. Once the burst of energy had subsided, he threw his body back in the seat, gasping for breath. 

This wasn’t getting him anywhere. Laurence reached over, pulling open the glove box and throwing papers into the seat as he hunted for the one thing that would let him think clearly. Panic sparked as the bottle remained elusive. Someone must have gotten into his car and taken it.

Ah, there it was!

His fingers wrapped around the old amber bottle. He hadn’t thrown it out yet and oh, Laurence was thankful for it. His back ached and if he was going to walk the rest of the way, he would need the pain treated first. 

That was all. 

Laurence’s fingers trembled as he screwed the dropper off. There was nothing he could suction out of the bottle with it. He groaned, dropping the glass dropper into the seat. Throwing his head back as he upturned the bottle. 

There had to be a drop or two left in the bottle. Laurence needed it. Shaking the bottle, he willed a drop to fall into his mouth. Nothing came out.

Tears gathered in Laurence’s eyes as he picked the dropper back up, putting it in his mouth. Shameful. He was a shameful man. Laurence sucked the dried, bitter remnants off the glass dropper, running his tongue over the inside of the cap as he sought every bit of the tincture he could find. 

Once the bitter taste was no more, he turned his attention back to the bottle. He sucked at the threads, seeking the bitter taste that promised relief from the pain before he tried to force his tongue inside. The bottle was too small for that to work, resulting in him shoving his pinky inside, trying to soak up any medication on his skin. 

He considered breaking the bottle under a rock and licking the broken shards before he pulled himself under control. There were too many people on the street for him to do that. They would see him being shameful and rumors would spread. 

Fog, not nearly strong enough, slowly pulled over his mind. It wasn’t enough, but it was better than nothing. It was good enough for now. He needed to get to one of the fresher bottles he had stashed for emergencies. 

Laurence threw open the door to his car, stepping out. He would get this situation taken care of. Sparing a look back at his car, he walked down the sidewalk. He’d find a few things to sell and then make his way to the station. 

Somehow he would gather the funds needed, he would make that damned payment to the half bit radio host who thought he was too big for his place in society. Oh, what Laurence would give to knock that man down a few pegs, reminding him where he belonged. People seemed to forget what that man was, what his mother was. 

Laurence ran his hand through his hair, tangled knots catching on his knuckles as he walked down the sidewalk. The hairs ripped from his scalp as he pulled his hand away. Through the fog, he hardly winced as he shook the hairs from his hand. 

He had to hurry. 

“Mr. Latimer,” a woman stepped out of his way but held her hand up to him in greeting, “I don’t usually see you this time of day, not around here? Is everything alright?”

“I’m fine, Mrs. Smith.” Laurence slowed, “I’m in a rather big hurry, though.”

“I’m sure.” She looked down the sidewalk one way and then another. “I just- I… My cousin has a business, you see. He could use some help with marketing. Could I… could I give him your card?”

“Of course, of course!” Laurence reached into his pocket, pulling out his wallet. His hands trembled as he flipped it open, struggling to pull a business card out to pass to the woman he couldn’t place in that moment. “Here you go!”

“Thank you.” She rested her hand on his shoulder. “Where are you off to in such a hurry?” 

“Business,” he said shortly. “Just business.” 

“Well,” she said, “I think he’s in the cafe now, actually. Why don’t you join me for a cup of coffee and you can meet him?”

“Can’t,” Laurence said, forcing a smile to his face. “I’ve got places to be, meetings to attend.” 

He would not tell her he was left with no choice but to shutter the business by the end of the summer if he couldn’t turn things around. Hell, if he couldn’t slow the hemorrhaging of funds, he feared the end would come even sooner. 

Join us at VoxTek for a Vox themed Hazbin Discord where we talk Vox, Hazbin, writing, reading, art and who knows what else. You may even catch some exclusive sneak peeks at upcoming fics from some of your favorite writers!

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[onysfavreader]

Random hc of being Ony's hyperfemblack!wife

You getting spoiled way to much but Ony who doesn't mind because his girl deserves the universe and more

Ony who can never have enough pictures and videos of you on his phone because he is quick to show you off at any chance you recording little maintenance vlogs for your photo shoots together

Ony who just loves you so much and never want to not see you smile

Ony being the only one to help you handle your emotions and make you feel better because he knows you can't help but be so emotional "Shh baby tell me what's wrong" "What happened ma why you look so upset"

Picks you up if you try to walk away from him when you're upset

Ony letting you decorate bc you're helping each other create your dream lives and that included giving you your dream pinterest house and closet lmao

You being the only one who gets to see Ony's soft side after you spent forever trying to get through to him like he put you through the worst when you first started talking but now he makes up for it every day and you brag about it to yourself because it took you forever to get him to that point

You not being any better in the beginning of your relationship those half assed ‘situationships’ could never prepare you for your relationship with Ony your the reason ony’s patience and trust for you is as high as it is

You two giving golden retriever and black cat energy Ony doesn’t look like he likes anyone and doesn’t but is the sweetest ever once you really get to know him especially to you and you looking the sweetest on the outside but you’re are worse then people think Ony is

Ony supporting you through everything and you doing the same even if you don't know exactly what he's doing you trust him

You walking around wrapped in a robe or one of many blankets almost everyday bc your always cold until Ony caught on buying you hoodies and jackets in his size just to see how cute you look when they cover so much more of your body than his

Ony giving you all the hugs kisses and praises he can because he knows you fiend off his attention and will throw the worst fits when you don't get it

You holding onys two fingers instead of his hand bc he's so big

Ony who lifts double your weight on a bad day this and just picks you up and you love it until he pisses you off "Put my ass down now" you shout trying to push him away "Why you not talking to me ma what's wrong" "Boy fuck you" "We gotta work on the mouth of yours" "Ony put me down" You laughed as he carried you to your bedroom “Don’t laugh now” “Baby I’m sorry” “I don’t want to hear none of that ma”

You absolutely loving Ony and the life you've built together

You're only piece of gold jewelry is an anklet with an 'o' charm and you refuse to take off even after he offered to get it in silver

Buying Ony just as many if not more flowers then he buys you

Ony and you having two dogs that are your babies. Ony's being some big 'scary' dog like a black pit bull that absolutely adores you and your a cute little brown toy poodle that Ony tries not to trip over bc they follow him almost as much as you follow him

You and Ony would have different "rooms" that would be your own space yours would be in the attic and he would have his in the basement but you two would still have your bed room

Ony never letting you know what he does for work but he keeps you safe and happy so you push your suspensions aside

You and Ony being the cutest together like your head over heels for him and he completely adores you

You being onys entire world and universe sun and all with the brightest smile on your pretty face and biggest heart

You both having to learn to love but know you want to be with each other for the rest of your lives so you push through the rough patches

Ony cooks and you bake

Ony doing the bathroom, dish, taking out the trash, fixing things, lawn work, bills, bugs, ect

You organizing, decorates, takes care of the dogs, cleans laundry, houses maintenance, groceries, ect

You and Ony who spoil each other rotten and love it

You doing Ony's hair and it's just a cute moment between you two every few weeks one of you will set up the bathroom before going to get the other then you'll sit on the sink with him in front of you most off the time it's quiet as Ony watches you concentrate

You rarely buying Ony gifts because you're always making something for him

You never being able to get enough of Ony

You have the prettiest garden with flowers herbs and fruits that you somehow managed to scared the dogs away from and plug!Ony will some times ask for help when growing his weed

- smut

Definitely the daddy dom of your my dreams he can be the sweetest softest dom ever or the scariest brat tamer but a pleasure dom either way

You almost being apillow princess bc Ony loves being the one to make you cum just by using you but you knowing how to suck it off the bone and neither of you can resist having him down your throat

You being a sweetheart but when you aren’t you can get a horrible attitude and smart mouth only Ony can handle because he knows how to keep your mouth full

Ony can't help but come inside of you so he pays for your birth control

Ony's 's so big and strong and so so big especially compared to you and you love it just the thought turns you on like just looking up at him while you standing next to him maybe holding his fingers and all you can do is squeeze your legs together

Ony fucking you in his hoodies

His voice is music to your ears but His praise will make you're eyes roll back and brain go dumb every time "Fuck you're so good baby just like that" "There you go ma"

You calling him daddy bc what is an Ony

Being each other's biggest eaters

Ony will pick you up and carry you away to your bedroom when he needs you and when you need him you’ll wrap your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist or you’ll straddle his lap until he eventually gets it

You are definitely kinker then ony hands down and has to teach him things like

You liking soft intimate sex and Ony who fucks you so hard you go dumb almost every time And somehow he always knows which one you need

[wellnessgirlblog]

Selfcare Sunday Ideas

Slow Morning

Wake up before 8 am.

Do some Yoga.

Meditate.

Make your fav breakfast.

Plan

Plan your schedule for the week.

Set intentions for the week.

Check in on your goals.

Upate your calendar for the week.

Plan meals, grocery shop, meal prep.

Chores

Make your beed,

Change bedding.

Empty dishwasher.

Clean bathroom.

Clear/wipe surfaces.

Sweep/mop floors.

Take trash out.

Do your laundry.

Clean out your purse or backpack.

Wash makeup brushes.

Organize closet.

Relax

Listen to a podcast.

Spend the day without social media.

Call a loved one.

Bake something.

Go for a walk.

Selfcare

Do your skincare routine.

Bubble bath.

Wash and condition hair.

Use a hair mask.

Wash and moisturise face.

Use a face mask.

Apply body lotion.

File and paint nails.

Exfoliate your skin.

Shave.

Wind Down

Have a light dinner.

Drink a cup of tea.

Light a candle.

Read a book or watch a movie.

Journaling.

Go to sleep early.

[f4unlette]

𝑤𝑎𝑦𝑠 𝑡𝑜 ����𝑡𝑎𝑦 𝑜𝑐𝑐𝑢𝑝𝑖𝑒𝑑

⌗ bake for other people, like family, friends, colleagues

⌗ watch mukbang videos, informative documentaries about internet phenomenons, history (political, fashion) crime or strange occurrences

⌗ listen to new music and learn more about the artist or the band itself, make new playlists

⌗ watch a gameplay on youtube or play childhood nostalgic video games

⌗ learn new makeup styles, hairstyles and build outfits based off of different fashion styles

⌗ get a homemade manicure

⌗ create your own website (ex. carrd)

⌗ deep cleaning: making your bed, doing laundry, going through a pile of clothing, throwing away old/expired makeup products, de-cluttering, cleaning the bathroom, deep cleaning the kitchen and the pantry by throwing away expired products, cleaning bags, boxes, wallets and pencil cases, changing the aesthetic of your bedroom

⌗ gardening or taking care of house plants

⌗ learn more about certain species of flowers, animals, subjects (like astronomy, philosophy, sociology, biology) and take notes

⌗ make a shopping list for necessities (food, cleaning supplies, hygiene necessities) and wishes (makeup, clothing, collectibles) on paper and by making pinterest boards and sections

⌗ re-watch old nostalgic movies or series (comedy anime like azumanga daioh, lucky star, nichijou, gakuen handsome and saiki k, horror/thriller and comedy movies, novelas)

⌗ read a book, whether it’s classic literature or a comic book

⌗ studying: watching videos, taking notes, reciting out loud

⌗ take an everything shower with music playing. from skincare, to hair care, brushing teeth and body care

⌗ skincare: do a face mask and a gua sha massage, learn more about your skin type and how to take care of it

⌗ make handmade gifts:

customized cds/playlists

paper crafts: stickers, bookmarks, collages, keychains with shrink paper, decorated envelopes (drawings, glitter, paint, gluing things like buttons and lace, 3d open envelope drawings), scenery stands, fake food and objects, strings, drawing posters, paper stars, paper crowns, flower bouquets, realistic camera;

clay crafts: vases, boxes, plates, bowls, spoons, jewelry holders, cups and mugs, charms, rings, playhouses, paint palettes, animal sculptures, candle and incense stands, lighter cases;

crocheting and sewing: hats, gloves, scarves, plushies, keychains, pillow covers/pillows, bags, cup stands, book cases, water bottle bags, pencil cases, creating new clothes out of old ones, mixed/leftover fabric rugs or blankets.

bracelets: patterned, beaded, with a string and buttons;

other: door handle hangers, painted wooden spoons, painted tiles, painted tea bags, pins, painted rocks, decorated journal cases, soap making, altoid wallets, decorate your phone case, hair wraps, decorate a photo frame, recycle an old candle (seashell and can candles), flags, window beads, hair accessories (decorated headbands, hairpins), decorated sunglasses, soda tab friend, bleached t-shirts, surfboard necklace, washi tape, gift baskets.

gift ideas

diy ideas when you’re bored

clay crafts ideas

cinnamon roll trinket box (just really wanted to share this one, it’s absoluty adorable ♡)

⌗ try out a new sport: ex. badminton, volleyball, dance, swimming, tennis, basketball, martial arts, athletics.

⌗ do pilates or a 1980s workout, play just dance or do a karaoke session

⌗ play a board/card game (monopoly, trivial pursuit, uno, cluedo, guess who)

⌗ take a walk and explore your surroundings

⌗ write down new recipes you haven’t tried yet including the necessary steps to make them and make a grocery shopping list of everything you need

[thiniceofeternalyouth]

MISLEADIN' ME SERIES: CHAPTER TWENTY THREE

"MY BEST ARTWORK"

⊳ Gojo Satoru x f!reader

series masterlist

Genre: angst, fluff, sci-fi, cosmology.

Words count: ~14.7k

⊲ previous

[December 9, 2023, 8:43pm; USA, State of Alaska, Utqiagvik]

It was still a long time before Christmas, but the small town on the edge of the Earth had already begun to come alive and transform - the winter winds carried not only the cold but also the smells of baking and ginger cookies, the wooden facades glittered with garlands, and almost every house had a small but colorfully decorated Christmas tree. You didn't even have to look out the windows, for even with the corner of your eye you could see the bustle in every kitchen.

You were on your way home from shopping - while Gojo was carrying an obscene number of bags, you were sipping on the cold chocolate milk he had solemnly handed you when you offered to help. Finally reaching the house, you perked up and literally ran to the door, almost tripping on the step. "Careful," laughed the sorcerer, grabbing you by the collar.

"Brrr," you shivered involuntarily, barely crossing the threshold and looking at yourself in the small mirror by the entrance - the frost on your eyelashes and eyebrows immediately melted away, but your face was still red.

Gojo rustled the bags and set them on the floor. "I'll turn on the battery," he grinned, and, kissing you on the forehead, walked off in the bedroom. You mentally thanked him - he was always worrying about the little things, thus constantly and imperceptibly making your life easier and simpler. Whether he did it intentionally or unconsciously, it still felt good. You sniffed and took off your wet jacket, and, as was your new habit in this house, you took off your mask, too.

You squatted down beside the bags and rummaged through them - among the piles of groceries and bathroom utensils, there were also a few crystal glasses and, to your delight, the very plates with thin gold lines that had caught your eye only a short time ago. With a satisfied smile, you grabbed the bag of laundry supplies and went into the bathroom to put everything in its place.

While you were arranging it, humming softly to yourself, there was a short, jingling crack and clank in the kitchen, and you rounded your eyes in surprise. "I hope it's just your eye fell out," you warned, remembering your beautiful plates you just bought.

When you walked into the kitchen, the first thing you saw was Gojo's confused and guilty look, though only the shards of one of the crystal glasses were lying on the floor. "It just fall off, I didn't do anything," he tried to justify himself, but all you cared about were his hands.

"Are ya okay?" you asked worriedly. Carefully you stepped around the broken glass and gently took his palms in your hands and examined them - the wounds healed right before your eyes, but the scarlet blood that had just oozed from them remained on his hands. You stared at the red droplets, mesmerized, not even feeling the saliva beginning to pool in your mouth.    

"Baby?" Gojo called you cautiously, squeezing your palms harder.

You stirred, horrified to realize your thought. "I... I'm just hungry," you waved it off, picking up the shards from the floor.

The sorcerer frowned - your words carried a double meaning, and he understood each one of them, but remembering your words about diet, he didn't pressure you with it. "Then how about gyoza?" asked Gojo, joining you with picking glass shards from the floor.

"Sounds delicious!" you chirped, and he chuckled wistfully - your mood was still changing by the click as if you still didn't feel safe around him when you were vulnerable. "But what's that?"

Laughing, he explained the recipe to you - in words it looked simple, ordinary Japanese dumplings. You both quickly cleaned up the kitchen from glass and rummaged through the groceries you had bought. Luckily, you had everything you needed for the dough, and the filling could be anything from fish to beef. "Then I'll do the dough," you boldly declared. "You cut the shrimps."

"How cruel," Gojo chuckled, and you averted your eyes awkwardly. "I like it," he reassured you, kissing the top of your head.

Ten minutes later, the whole kitchen was covered in oil and flour, and you were trying desperately to turn the dough into a thin layer, but it would not budge and you had to start all over again. Whether it you were all thumbs today or it was your dizziness to blame - Gojo had long since washed the blood off his hands, but you could still smell it. You tried desperately to control your breathing, but it kept coming out of you in heavy spurts, like a bird that couldn't fly. Sweat trickled down the back of your neck, freezing your skin and making you shudder. You clenched your teeth as your eyes watered.

"Nose!" you shouted suddenly, turning to the sorcerer - he dropped the knife in surprise.

"Mochi, what...," he began fearfully.

"Nose! My nose! Scratch it, hurry!" when he heard your command, he staggered back and looked at your face with a dazed look for a second, then turned his gaze to your raised hands, which were covered in flour.

Laughing, Gojo began to stroke the tip of your nose with his fingertip, and by the look on his cheeky face, he did it on purpose. You squinted crossly, and with a smile, he gave in and began scratching as he should. With a satisfied exhale, you turned away and started to torture the dough again.

"That's it?" the sorcerer asked resentfully, pouting his lips. "You used me, and you didn't even say 'thank you'?"

"Lean down a little," you commanded slyly, and before he could playfully respond to your impulse, you grabbed him by the chin and kissed him fervently. Before Gojo realized what was happening, you'd already pulled away from him - he hung his head, snorting frustratedly, and resumed slicing the seafood.

"Baby?" he turned to you uncertainly, and you noticed out of the corner of your eye that he'd stopped cooking, just pretending to hold the knife weakly in his hand. You, pursing your lips, nodded your head weakly. "Don't you… Don't you wanna come back?" the sorcerer asked cautiously.

You didn't say anything, but he could hear you holding your breath and he could feel your heart skip a beat. "You know that I'm not gonna push you," he reassured you, putting the knife away and coming up behind you - putting his arms around your waist and resting his chin on your shoulder, he kept looking at your frowning profile and the monotonous way you were rolling out the dough. Gently rubbing his nose against your neck, he kissed your shoulder. "It's just... uh… Actually, Danielle's pregnant," your reaction awakened glimpses of a ridiculous smile on his face - you, frozen in place, slowly turned your head.

There was interest in your gaze, and Gojo would have admired it for eternity, but what burned brighter than curiosity was guilt, glassy and sticky. "You don't have to show up in front of them and make excuses," he said softly, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear. "We can watch from afar, can't we? What do you think?"

[December 10, 2023, 05:09pm; Kyoto, Kyoto Prefecture, Kyoto College]

The sun was shining bright and warm, though the cold snow crunched under your feet. You were sitting on the roof of one of the college temples - from here you had a beautiful view of the whole site. As you wrapped yourself tighter in your jacket, whether from the cold or embarrassment, Gojo kept glancing up at you. His gaze was both sly and troubled, his heart thudding with fear and shame.

You stared longingly at the silhouettes in the distance in the training stadium - you couldn't quite make out each one, but you could feel Danielle's presence among them. The urge to get closer, to look at her, to see if she had changed or stayed the same was unbearably irresistible, but you didn't dare move. Before you could sigh, you were out of breath.

The sudden sneak attack from the person closest to you made your head spin - you stood on your own two feet away from those who had no idea you were there. You turned your head slowly, not believing what was happening, and looked at Gojo - in your gaze he immediately considered bewilderment and fright, but he only smiled mischievously. "Come on, how long are you going to stand here?" he pulled you by the shoulder towards your loved ones.

"I'm not going anywhere!" you blurted out.

"Relocate."

You weren't far away, literally ten paces behind him, but you were quickly going away, arms crossed over your chest. "Where do you think you're going?" he shouted, laughing, and then he was behind you, pulling you back by the shoulders. Your attempts to evaporate failed - everyone in the training stadium already looked at you in disbelief. "Scaredy-cat!" he taunted you, turning you around and pushing you forward, towards the others.

"Ya said we were just gonna watch from afar!" you whined, fighting back.

"But you were so eager to see Danielle's belly," the sorcerer hid his true good motives behind a sly tone. "She's only five months pregnant, what are you gonna see from that rooftop?"

The closer Gojo drew you, the hotter your heart and cheeks became - shame burned away all common sense, and nausea came to your throat. You didn't fight back, but you couldn't lift your head - you stared fearfully at the ground. Until you saw someone's feet.

An awkward silence pressed against your temples. When you realized there was nowhere to go, you slowly took your eyes off the ground. Dany was standing in front of you - you noticed involuntarily but disappointedly that you couldn't see anything under her winter coat, and only then did you notice her empty eyes, but the storm of emotion was revealed by the slightly contorted face and furrowed brows, as if someone had squeezed her arm painfully. "Dany, I...," you began, taking a step forward and not knowing what to say next or how to justify yourself. To your surprise, she rushed toward you, but you didn't have time to spread your arms out for a hug - just as she was at your side, the sound of a slap resounded through the stadium.

You instinctively put your palm to the blazing spot and looked up at her, blinking dazedly - there were tears in her empty eyes now.

"Danielle!" barked Gojo sternly. You were suddenly pulled in and your face was hidden - he pulled you against his chest while you still pressed your palm to your cheek in confusion. "Manners!" he hissed more quietly, leaning toward her.

"Back off!" she exploded in response. Maybe it was the hormones, or maybe it was the accumulated bitterness from the moment you left her.

"It's okay," you pulled away from the sorcerer slightly, chuckling nervously. "It felt like it was deserved," you turned to the girl again. Sighing raggedly, you opened your mouth again, but this time you were interrupted by a heated hug - she snuggled up against you, hiding her crying face in your neck. If before you were just scared and confused, now you were numb - you didn't know what you were supposed to do. You squeezed her against you in return, and caught the stern look of Megumi, who was standing nearby. It had only been a few months, but this separation had helped you see him as a man instead of a boy. You shifted your gaze to the young students who were training under Fushiguro's command - apparently, he had ordered them to train despite the scene that had unfolded. You felt doubly embarrassed. "I'm sorry," you whispered in Danielle's ear, and even though you knew Fushiguro wouldn't hear your sincere words, you still hoped he could read your lips.

Regretfully admitting that you never would have come back if you hadn't been pressed for time, you pulled Danielle even tighter against you - a silent admission of guilt, a timid attempt to beg forgiveness. They were hurt too, but they stayed. They didn't run away, they didn't close their eyes, they didn't pretend like nothing had happened - even though they were young, they accepted what had happened as part of their fate. "Well, what do we have here...," you mumbled awkwardly, placing your hands on the girl's stomach. Danielle, blushing, wrapped her palms around your hands and pressed them a little harder.

"Ya are not likely to feel it through jacket...," Dany replied shyly as you began stroking her belly, fumbling for changes. "Why don't we go inside?" she hesitantly suggested in a quiet voice.

You looked back at Gojo - he was glowing brighter than a star and smiling as he looked at you. "Go on," he chirped happily, kissing the top of your head. "I've still got...," he grimaced for just a moment, remembering how many missed calls from Masamichi were glowing on his phone screen. "A couple of troubles," he finished cheerfully, looking at the minka that housed Principal Yaga's office.

"Should I start worrying?" you ask sternly, raising an eyebrow.

"Absolutely not!" he assured you, and before you could start digging deeper, disappeared from your sight.

"Handling it?" giggled Dany with a good-natured sneer.

"Well...," you said slyly, and slowly raised your hand - when Danielle saw your wrist, she stopped talking and froze, her mouth hanging open in amazement. Her gaze darted hesitantly between the watch, the ring, and your face - the more she realized, the more she frowned.

"Congratulations!" she shrieked loudly, squealing with joy, and pounced on you with renewed vigor - the two of you nearly falling to the ground.

"Danielle, be careful!" anxiously shouted Megumi.

"Fussing over me like a mother hen. I'm not a little girl," muttered the girl grumpily, glaring angrily at him, but as she turned to you, her face brightened again. "Well, tell me! How was it? When? Where? Did ya cry? And him?"

"Whoa, easy!" you laughed. "I'll tell you everything. Ya go inside, and I wanna have a word with him," you nodded toward Fushiguro.

"About?" asked Dany incredulously, squinting suspiciously.

"About ya not being little girls anymore," you chuckled and nudged her in the direction of the dormitory. She looked back at you, pouting, and gave you a resentful look before snorting and walking briskly toward the building.

You slowly approached Megumi - he didn't seem to pay any attention to you, just continued to watch the new students practicing. The awkwardness was present, but it wasn't building. You decided that you had nothing to lose, so you sat down on the snow-covered grass.

Megumi, who had ignored you until now, finally looked up at you with a perplexed but grim look - he sat down beside you with a short sigh. The pain of confusing words curled tightly right in your throat - unimagined, they wanted to come out, but you didn't know what you should say, but you couldn't leave silently either. "So… ya are a teacher now?" you asked, smiling awkwardly.

"Replacing Gojo in his absence," Megumi replied coldly. "So yeah... I guess you could say I'm a full-fledged teacher now. Besides, I and Principal Yage have to deal with his paperwork," the boy scowled. "So... If you ever decide to run away again, run somewhere closer," he added more softly, looking away.

You grinned wistfully, tucking your legs under you, making yourself comfortable. "Ya know, ya... uh. Ya've matured."

A rare look of surprise flashed across Fushiguro's face. "Yeah... I guess. Not that I had a choice," he muttered, scratching the back of his head.

He'd had to keep people safe before, but now he was a husband and a father, and that branded a protector on his heart forever. Or maybe it was because you hadn't seen him in a very long time. "Well... I'm glad," you smiled, and as you cupped his face, the boy nearly choked and a pale blush appeared on his cheeks, though not even the cold could do that. "But now I know ya'll always be able to protect Danielle," you said softly, squeezing his cheeks lightly.

"I don't like the way you say it," he cut off restlessly, staring at you intently. In the depths of his blue eyes, speculation swam but sank in.

"That was just a compliment, boy," you laughed, removing your hands. Sighing happily, you rose to your feet. "Now I have to go to your wife for questioning. See ya," you chirped, ruffling his hair.

Danielle tortured you for at least an hour. You had to tell her everything, every little detail, from where you'd settled to how and where Gojo had proposed to you. Of course, you avoided too intimate and racy details, because in front of you was still the same Danielle you had bathed and fed when she was a child. You couldn't see her as a grown-up girl, and even the fact that she was carrying a baby under her heart didn't help dispel the nostalgic image of her.

While she sat on the couch eating chips, you sat on the floor in front of her. Your hands rested on her small, rounded belly, and you hypnotized it with your gaze. You glanced questioningly, suspiciously at Dany - she shrugged guiltily. "Honestly, baby was restless before this. But he's quiet now. And thank goodness," she mumbled.

"I didn't realize they started moving so early," you mused thoughtfully, stroking her belly.

"Me too," Danielle laughed out loud. "Ieiri said it's individualized, but on average the baby starts to move noticeably at 18-20 weeks. And I'm already at... 22? I'm not sure."

Whether it was a phantom or the truth, but you felt as if your palm had been quietly kicked. You looked at each other in amazement. "I think he felt ya," Dany said gently, stroking her stomach as if reassuring the one who was inside. "Baby, can you feel it? It's your...," she looked at you, and pressed her lips together to keep from laughing. "Grandma."

You rolled your eyes so that only the whites remained visible. "No way."

"Yeah, that's right," Danielle chirped cheerfully, popping a chip in her mouth. "I'll complain to ya about how hard motherhood is, about his tummy cramps, about his teething, and I'll send him to ya for the weekends."

You shook your head as if in rebuke, but you couldn't stop smiling. "And ya've already got it all planned out."

"Of course!" exclaimed Danielle indignantly. "When I found out I was pregnant, I almost lost my mind! At first, I couldn't bear the thought of becoming a mother, and then I was terrified - even if I could, what kind of mother would I be? I didn't know anything about it. But Ieiri reassured me that no parent is perfect and advised me to start planning while I had time, so that it would be easier. She gave me all kinds of books, both medical and psychological, so… I'm not even afraid of childbirth so much anymore."

The prick of conscience was right on your heart - the bitter liquid was injected slowly, giving you time to realize what you'd done. Without saying anything, you rested your head gently on her stomach, pressing your cheek against it. You didn't lean on it, you seemed to just hold your head in the air. And your imagination was quietly making you hear two heartbeats. "It's okay. Or rather... I'm still angry. But not so much anymore," Danielle muttered, and you flinched as you felt her stroking your hair.

"How's Mike doing?" you asked quietly.

"From a normal ordinary of view, horrible. But when you take into account everything he's been through... Quite bearable," Danielle admitted honestly, continuing to stroke you. "It wasn't... It wasn't her, was it?"

"No," you said, remembering your sister.

Danielle didn't push you. She suspected something was wrong, and even though you were a dioreact, you'd never thrown yourself at anyone close to you before. At least, she'd never seen it or known about it. "That's what I thought..."

"Can I... see him?" you asked cautiously, squeezing her thighs slightly. You had no one else to ask, for it was Danielle who had taken over the care of Rachel's son after her death. And, for some reason, you needed her consent.

"Sure you can, but... I'm not sure he'll talk to ya," Danielle said hesitantly, looking away even though you weren't looking at her. "He's basically almost stopped talking. Sits in his room all day long. Either sleeping or collecting model airplanes. I've tried taking him outside, introducing him to kids his own age, and it's like he never even resists, it's just... I don't know. It's like he's not here. I even tried to explain to him what happened, but he didn't react at all..."

You couldn't know how your meeting with Mike would go, but even if the mere sight of you could awaken a simple emotion like anger in him, then it wouldn't all be for nothing. "So where is he?"

"Follow me," Danielle sighed understandingly, lifting herself up as you took her arms and helped her to her feet. "My lower back is starting to hurt so bad," she grumbled, rubbing her back.

You followed her obediently through the corridors, and every once in a while your anxious thoughts about the meeting would drift away - you marveled at how Danielle had navigated such a place. Your old house had been so much easier. You cringed as memories swirled before your eyes, from the warmest to the most heartbreaking.

When Dany stopped at one of the doors, you froze with her, out of breath. Your body felt heavy like it was filled with lead, and you didn't dare blink lest you ruin it right now. What should you have said to him?

She opened the door with a nod and stepped into the room - you could see the child's slumped back and shoulders through the gap. Mike was monotonously picking something up and didn't even pay attention to the fact that someone had invaded his personal space. "Mike," Danielle gently called out to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Someone's here to see ya."

The boy didn't express even a modicum of curiosity or interest. He didn't even let on that he'd heard her. Danielle turned to you and shook her head dejectedly. Now it was up to you whether or not to enter the room.

Stepping hesitantly across the threshold, you left your pride in the hallway. "Hey, Mike," he stiffened when he heard your voice. His body tensed and his hands clenched into fists - even from here, you could see them trembling. But it wasn't fear at all.

He jumped up, clutching the box cutter in his hand, and backed away to the wall, as if looking to it for protection. You were looking at yourself through someone else's eyes - that's what they saw in you. "Go away," the boy hissed, extending the little knife in your direction.

His voice no longer sounded like a child's. Maybe he hadn't spoken for too long, or maybe his age had added to his hatred. You slowly raised your hands, trying with your whole appearance to show what he was looking for now - safety. "Mike, I..."

"Get out!" he shouted, lunging forward and displaying his knife.

"Okay, I'll leave. Don't worry," you tried to say as softly as you could, and you were starting to feel sick of your own voice. You slowly stepped away, toward the door, still holding your hands out in front of you as you were chased away by furious eyes.

Once at the door, you quickly slammed it shut and leaned your back against it - you were breathing heavily, and you'd be horrified if you saw your reflection.

"Y/N, ya okay?...," Dany asked cautiously, stepping closer to you and placing her hands on your trembling shoulders. You were finding it too hard to control yourself. You couldn't contain yourself even in front of a small child. Something was happening to you, and there was nothing you could do about it.

"Yeah...," you tried to brush it off, smiling. "Come on. You haven't finished your chips yet."

Danielle anxiously shuffled beside you. "Give him time. It'll come out much better next time, I'm sure..."

"It's okay, Dany," you assured her detachedly. "Maybe someday Mike will understand why I did what I did," you scratched the back of your head awkwardly. "And if he doesn't... Soon it won't matter."

"What do you mean?" alarmed Danielle, grabbing your arm.

"It's nothing like that," you chuckled, squeezing her palm. "I'm just saying that not much in this world can be that significant for too long," despite your words, the unease in Danielle's heart only grew. You were here with her, but by the ghosts of your deeds you made yourself a ghost, and it seemed to everyone around you that you could disappear at any moment. "Let's go outside. We need some fresh air."

Danielle nodded, understanding you - she was having trouble breathing, too. You stepped out of the minka, and you took off your jacket and laid it on the porch, thinking that it was inappropriate for a pregnant girl to sit on the cold steps. "Sit down here," you patted the jacket next to you.

"You shouldn't have...," Dany was embarrassed.

"Just sit down already."

Danielle snorted and sat up obediently, but her displeasure quickly dissipated with the winter wind. She glimpsed you - you weren't even shivering, and your appearance had returned to normal. How much strength did it take for you to keep your sanity? How did it feel on the inside? Was it excruciatingly painful, or did you not notice at all who lived with you in your own body? She began to understand you and your actions - if she shared a body with an entity whose motives were vague and sometimes bloodthirsty, she would probably want to escape from everything and everyone, too.

But somehow, you loved them all. And cared for them as best you could and as you understood this word. The girl had no doubts about that. "Y/N...," she began, faltering slightly and wrapping herself more tightly in her jacket, watching the wind carry the snowflakes away. "It was... it was you who killed Yoichi, wasn't it?"

"Yeah," you nodded, and not a muscle in your face quivered. Danielle knew it was wrong to be so happy about someone else's death, but inside everything was jubilant, and her heart was now pouring not blood but the gold of justice. "And the other one... I mean, I'll kill Christian too. Don't worry about it."

You've already regretted your decision to stay in college with everyone else. They were both your strength and your weakness. They were the people you wanted to protect, and they were also the people the blood flowed through - it was a hot call and a sweet whisper that beckoned to you, and you could barely resist. You either locked yourself in your room or forgot yourself in the training sessions Megumi had arranged for you. He seemed to mock you, pushing you beyond your limits, but you didn't say a word, didn't complain, and your eyes glowed with silent gratitude.

It was worse when Gojo wasn't around. When he hugged you, your essence wouldn't open its mouth, as if it was afraid of him, afraid of what he might do to it, or else it trembled at his presence, so much so that it didn't want to scare him away, just so long as he stayed close. But all this was a mockery for your soul, heart, and mind - as soon as the sorcerer left, it began to whisper fanatically to you about hunger.

You woke up early in the morning to a hot, longing kiss, though Gojo was only gone for a few days - an urgent mission, but he was hugging you, pressing your body into his, as if he wanted to be one. After you escorted him out the door to his whimpering, you went into the bathroom, staring at yourself in the blurry little mirror hanging on the wall. You couldn't tell the difference between reality and dream - your face was either normal or contorted in a grimace of anger or madness.

'You're hungry...'

Not a question, not a concern - an assertion you couldn't resist. You sharply splashed cold water on your face, leaning over the sink. Dark lines crawled up your arms, and you clenched your teeth at the insolence. The whisper wasn't a single phrase; it echoed throughout your mind, making you squint your eyes in pain.

'What are you going to do...?'

You didn't dignify the entity with a response - it was provoking you, pulling at your taut strings. But you were one, and you read its motives like a book - it wasn't asking about base desires, not about satiation, but it knew that time was running out.

'Now you're weak...'

"Shut your mouth!" you yelled, grabbing your head. "I need to think..."

At what point did the voice of essence become the voice of reason? It was right - you could hardly stand simple training without eating properly; on the other hand, you felt like even a drop of blood could drive you insane. You were on edge, and you didn't know how to fight Rei in such a state. But you'd rather kill yourself than not go to him until the doomsday. Should you become like your tormentor, devouring people and gaining strength, or fall proudly as a human?

After standing under a cold shower for an hour, you went for a training. You strained your body so hard that you could no longer feel it, and even then you kept running. Megumi immediately realized the failure of his idea to put you against the new students - they couldn't do anything to you, even though you didn't even try to avoid their blows. All you had to do was drown in physical exertion, diluted with blows of cursed energy.

By evening, the students began to disperse, and so did you. Woozy, you made your way to the kitchen, hoping to silence your hunger for at least a minute by emptying the entire fridge. A tired pair of eyes met you here - Ieiri, still dressed in her white robe, was sipping her wine, sitting alone at the table. "Finished already?"

"Uh-huh," you sighed tiredly, grabbing an armful of pre-made sandwiches from the fridge and dropping into the chair next to Shoko. You snatched the glass from her and drained it in a gulp under her exhausted, surprised gaze, and she took the second glass and poured more wine.

"It's not actually water," she said, clucking her tongue.

"I know. I'm not Jesus," you mumbled, panting and wiping your mouth with your hand. "Too bad. I could supply ya with wine for the rest of your life."

Ieiri chuckled quietly. "Has Gojo left yet?" she asked quietly but suddenly.

"This morning," she immediately saw you grimace as you mechanically chewed your sandwich. You were both tired, but you couldn't even move your arms, and your legs were spread out under the table as if they'd been severed from your body. There was a reason you were making such a mockery of yourself.

"How is it going?" she asked softly, nodding her head at you and examining the watch on your wrist.

"Are you talking about training or my life with a sex terrorist?" you mumbled reluctantly.

"Is it that bad?" she tried to joke, but there was worry lurking in her eyes and a willingness to eat her best friend alive - it all depended on your answer.

"Oh, no," you rebelled, but lit up with indignation. "I feel like a princess," you hissed, squirming in your chair. "But if Ariel had to give up her voice to get legs in the name of love, then I have to give up my voice and sit in a wheelchair. Ieiri, I can't handle him," you shook your head, staring at her with eyes round with terrible realization. "I just don't have as much stamina as he does."

"Do you have any idea how lazy this asshole is outside of work?" she laughed, grabbing her glass. "I'm sure it's not about stamina at all."

"And that's supposed to make me feel better?" you resented, biting down furiously on your sandwich.

"Have you talked to him about needing a break?"

You faded, feeling the embarrassment building up. "Yeah. He gets off me without questions, even though he whines. Problem is, I end up on top of him myself later for some reason. He's not a sorcerer. He's a warlock. A dark one."

There were joyful footsteps - Danielle had heard your voices in the kitchen, and, tired of sitting alone in the four walls of her room, she ran to you. "What are you discussing?" she chirped cheerfully, holding her belly and pushing back the chair next to you. She gave you a sly look and snatched one sandwich from under your nose.

"Aged sex," Ieiri replied thoughtfully, sipping from her glass. 

"Ugh," Danielle grumbled, shifting her gaze from Shoko to you.

"Excuse me?" you drawled indignantly. "It's waiting ya, too."

"No way," Danielle mumbled, taking a bite of her sandwich - she nearly cried when she felt like she wasn't nauseous anymore. Toxicosis had plagued her so badly and for so long that she'd forgotten the taste of food except for tomatoes, which was the only thing her pregnancy had allowed her to eat for the first couple of months. She sighed contentedly and devoured the sandwich in two bites - even you couldn't do that. You stared at her stunned. "What?" she mumbled with her mouth full.

"She had terrible toxicosis," Ieiri explained, sighing. "I almost lost my mind. I'm a doctor, and I couldn't even help."

"It wasn't your fault," Danielle protested, but Shoko only waved her away.

But it was your fault. You weren't here, you weren't comforting her, you weren't there for her like you were for Rachel. Not fulfilling her wants and whims, and you were grateful Megumi was doing that for her. "And not yours either," she added quietly, seeing you lost in thought. "So...," she chirped in a cheerful voice. "Are ya guys here at the college celebrating Christmas?"

"Nope," Ieiri shook her head. "It's not really celebrated in Japan either. I mean, there's no religious overtones to it. So we don't really do it here."

It was obvious how upset Danielle was - her shoulders slumped and she bit her lip in resentment. "Can't we at least decorate the Christmas tree?" she suggested embarrassedly. "And have a movie marathon."

"We should talk to the others about it...," Shoko brooded without enthusiasm.

"I'll get right on it!" squeaked Danielle enthusiastically, rising from her seat. You gave the fluttering girl a stunned look.

"Just imagine how bored she is," Ieiri sighed. "Megumi's afraid to let her go outside the college walls alone like that, and he's always at practice. She's grasping at everything."

"Well... Actually, she's always been like that," you shrugged, taking the wine glass in your hands. "It's just that under these circumstances, her behavior can be... a little hypertrophied."

"What about you?" despite the simplicity of the question, your insides dropped with surprise. "Planning anything for the holidays?"

You hummed under your breath, glaring at the table as you froze with your glass in your hands. "I don't know. He didn't say when he'd be back," you replied evasively, leaning the cold glass to your lips absently and not looking up at Shoko. Ieiri squinted, watching you, and shook her head. "It doesn't make sense," you drawled. "I mean, he's the strongest, why does it take so long to hunt down a curse sometimes?" you asked, hoping to change the subject.

"That's the problem," Ieiri replied, and her gaze became piercing - she wasn't about to let go of the previous topic of conversation. "The curses are so feared by him that finding them takes so much more out of him than exiling them," Shoko didn't know what made the anger boil up inside her - she pressed her lips together with force lest suspicion and anger seep between her words. "What about the wedding? Any ideas yet?" she continued to press, glancing at the watch on your wrist.

"Mmm... Nope. We haven't planned it yet," you replied thoughtfully, scratching the back of your head.

"Strange," Ieiri spat out, and you gave her a dazed look - the woman immediately faltered and her face relaxed a little. "I mean, it's weird that he hasn't gotten on you with it yet."

"It's not that...," you wanted to cower at her insight, but you continued to maintain an indifferent look. "We kinda glimpsed some details, but-"

"What are you up to?" interrupted Ieiri unceremoniously, pitching forward.

You lifted your chin a little, answering Shoko with her own weapon - you stared straight into her eyes, accepting the challenge. She could press you all she wanted, but you knew yourself how well you could keep your own and others' secrets. No matter how much the woman asked, no matter how much she tried to get at the truth, you would carry the memory of his promise to the demons with you to your grave. "Nothing," you put a stop to the conversation with a shake of your head.

Hopetown was as quiet as ever in the evening, not even the birds singing through the open window, let alone the voices of the people in their homes. It had been a week since the battue - now you were taking a well-deserved rest before going out again to raid and search the void for settlement. Frank had insisted on a family dinner this morning, but it was just you and Rachel in the kitchen - in house in general.

You monotonously peeled carrots for soup while your sister flipped through the tinder, occasionally showing you the candidates. A pot of water was already simmering on the stove, and outside the window the sunset was dissolving into dusk, and you were already thinking that no family dinner was going to happen. "How about this one?" asked Rachel thoughtfully, showing you the phone screen.

"He's got it written all over his face that he lives with his mom," you muttered, wrinkling your nose in disgust.

"I'm interested in what's in his pants, not who he's living with," Rachel snarled, turning away from you, but you caught a glimpse of her swiping to the left.

"If Frank would hear you like that...," you drawled in a teasing tone.

"Yeah," Rach rolled her eyes. "He would have heard if he'd gotten back in time. I get the impression they just simply abandoned us."

"Well, we'll get more food," you shrugged nonchalantly.

"...which we cooked ourselves," she snorted, and you nearly exploded with indignation. She wasn't even helping you cook, just standing there like a piece of furniture. A beautiful piece of furniture.

A moment later, the door to the house swung open - you instantly made a hurt face and didn't even turn around to see who was there. You heard first heavy footsteps and a man's heavy breath, followed by a lighter, inaudible gait. "Girls, I told ya I'd do all the cooking myself," Frank grumbled, and you turned around to start your tirade, but you stopped as soon as you saw them - Kyle and Frank were covered in grass and dirt, both of them looking tired. Kyle looked at you meaningfully, smiling guiltily. "Sorry...," Frank sighed, pushing you away from the stove with his massive side and taking over the reins of cooking. "Late because of kitchen-garden," you pursed your lips in embarrassment, scratching the back of your head - sometimes you forgot how much effort and time it took to provide provisions for even your small family, let alone an entire village.

While Kyle took a quick bath, Frank just rinsed his hands and quickly prepared dinner - you were always surprised at how easy it was for him to do housework. When the table was set, the four of you sat down with rumbling bellies.

"Are we waitin' for fucking prayer or something?" Rachel broke the silence.

"One more remark like that, and I'll really make ya pray instead of eat," glared Frank.

The kitchen was filled with the sound of cutlery and requests for salt and pepper. Either you were hungry or Frank had magic hands, but the food was delicious - you thought so every time you tasted Frank's cooking, trying not to swallow your own tongue. Like Rachel and Kyle, you could feel his heavy gaze on you - you tried not to move lest you reawaken this conversation, but as soon as Frank took a closer look at the table, the record turned itself on. "There are too many empty chairs here...," the man muttered.

"Dad, don't," Kyle tried to stop him.

"What do ya mean?" the man exploded, as if Kyle had thrown more wood on the blazing fire. "Okay those two, I'm not relying on them anymore," he hissed, waving you away - you glimpsed at your sister. Sure, she didn't act like a good girl, but she had once tried to build a family and it had ended in heartbreak, which was what made her like this, but there was no way Frank could understand that. Frank wasn't a bad man, but sometimes he was blind to his own children's feelings. Rach's face contorted in pain for a second, and you gently placed a hand on her hip. "But ya're the loving and caring one, aren't you? I'll even settle for a man, just bring someone over already!" the man ordered.

"Not with our job," Kyle replied grimly, continuing to eat.

Frank exhaled dejectedly. "I understand..."

"No, Dad, you don't," Kyle insisted softly but coldly. You and your sister looked at each other awkwardly and stared at your plates, pretending nothing was going on. "You were the best hunter, and I have no doubt that what you went through was horrible. But neither you nor the other hunters will ever understand what we go through."

Frank looked around you sympathetically, lingering his gaze on you. He had never been to the void and only knew of what was going on there from your words. "Ya're right, and yet...," he was silent for a moment, casting a heavy silence over your house. "Look, I know that what ya're doing is extremely dangerous. But on the other hand...," he perked up, trying to cheer you up. "We've never been this close to Diomorphea before. We now have the most elusive, but still existent, chance to rid the world of this disease."

Even the forks stopped clinking. In the back of your minds, each of you knew that you had gotten very close to your enemy, but who would give who a hard slap remained a mystery. "Have ya... Have ya ever heard of philosophical zombies?" you cautiously cut into the conversation, picking at your food with your fork.

"Here we go again...," Rachel rolled her eyes, leaning back in her chair and directing all her attention back to her phone.

"Ya talking about supposed people that look like humans but have no consciousness?" asked Kyle softly, and you looked up at him.

"Yes," you nodded. "It's actually weird that people figured out the concept of dioreacts on their own without even knowing they existed," you grinned skeptically.

"So what's the bottom line... with the philosophical zombies?" asked Frank, watching you closely.

"I heard somewhere that they have a kind of consciousness. But not their own, uh... Well, let's say their thoughts that they think are their own come to them from the outside, but they can't understand it. So, I was thinking that... Maybe I can't sense the consciousness of dioreacts because only Diomorphea have it? After all, every dioreact is a part of it, and it would make sense that they would perceive its thoughts as their own."

Rachel even put her phone aside and began to listen in. "If it's true... It'll make our job easier. Ya could just erase her consciousness through isolation."

You shook your head grimly. "If it's true, I'm afraid we'll only run into more problems."

"Like...?" forced you to continue Kyle.

You've lost your appetite. You put your fork aside and pushed the nearly full plate of food away from you. "What makes ya think I can destroy it so easily? Ya have to realize that our minds are completely different. Let's just say that just as in our world bodies can't interact with each other by forces of different natures, Diomorphea and I won't be able to interact with each other. The other question is... will I even realize that it's not a human consciousness in front of me? Will the Diomorphea realize that I've been inside its head? And if it will, what's next? Will it attack, run away, or pretend to be human, knowing that I've kinda tested it? And even if we destroy it, will its parts disappear with it or stay in their bodies?" these questions were on the very surface, and you were afraid to dig any deeper. It could stall the whole process.

"Even if the dioreacts don't disappear, at least they'll never be able to merge with human bodies again, which will make them extremely vulnerable, and as for the Diomorphea... If we can't recognize if the consciousness is human in someone we suspect, then...," Frank began thoughtfully, scratching his chin and lost in thought.

"We'll have to wait for them to slip up on something else," you finished quickly, gibbering and immediately slamming your mouth shut, pushing your plate of food toward you.

"Do ya already have someone in mind?" asked Frank incredulously, raising his eyebrows meaningfully and drilling you with a glare.

"No," you shook your head. "No, no. Not yet," you mumbled, replaying your answer in your head until it sounded like the truth.  

You looked at your phone screen. Gojo had been texting you all these days, asking you about everything and nothing, telling you how much he missed you, sending you pictures of things he found interesting, but there was no mention of when he was coming home.

Danielle still got everyone to decorate the tree - even those who were too lazy to do so. She encouraged her friends to cook with her and go shopping for gifts, which didn't make Fushiguro very happy - he couldn't go with her because of training, and the responsibility for the safety of his pregnant wife fell on Itadori's shoulders. The girl came to your door several times, knocking loudly on the door and asking you if you would be at the movie marathon she had planned for everyone on the night of the twenty-fourth to twenty-fifth. You looked for excuses - Dany didn't believe any of them, and it made her first resentful and then anxious. She only quietly asked you to think about it again, and then left you alone.

You couldn't tell her that you couldn't be around people anymore. Not when Gojo wasn't around. You could no longer hide the hungry grin, the thick saliva that accumulated in your mouth at the sight of warm skin and eyes that were now permanently black. You wished your hands were shackled and a chain around your neck, chained to a concrete wall - just so you knew you wouldn't hurt anyone.

You gripped the wooden table with dark claws, barely standing on your feet - there wasn't much time left. You sobbed softly. If only he would make it. You wanted to see him, to touch his hands, to hear his voice and the way he called your name.

You looked at your phone screen. December twenty-fourth was slowly dying before your eyes.

You raised your head sharply, waiting, your keen hearing picking up the quiet rattle of keys on the other side of the door. You were at the door in a flash, and you swung it open with a violent jerk, ripping the lock from its roots. He slowly shifted his gaze from the broken door to you, holding the keys in his hands. "Honey, no one's ever waited for me to come home like this before."  

You threw yourself into his arms, and Gojo was instantly wrapped around you, lifting you up. The playful mood on his face darkened as he furrowed his brows, sensing you trembling. "Ya here," you whispered frantically, burying your face in his neck. "Ya came to me after all."

"Baby," he said restlessly in a half voice, stepping into the room and not letting you go. He shut the broken door behind you, sat you down on the edge of the bed and sat on the floor in front of you, wrapping his hands around your face to stop you hiding it. "What's going on with you?" the sorcerer asked quietly, seeing your black eyes. You shook your head, holding your palms around his hands and pressing them harder against your cheeks. As long as he was here, you were fine. "Mochi... when was the last time you ate?" he asked cautiously.

"What?..." you're confused, lowering your gaze again as if trying to remember something. "A couple hours ago...

"That's not what I meant," Gojo said sternly, but his touch remained gentle. "When did you feed your... other part?" you furrowed your eyebrows. You didn't like that question, but what was worse, you couldn't remember. "I get it...," he sighed, and without asking you for more permission, he rolled up the sleeve of his uniform - you watched in horror as the sorcerer brought a finger up to his wrist. He didn't even need a knife, just a gentle swipe across his skin - a fresh, red wound opened up, tearing your restraint to shreds with a single drop of blood that ran down his forearm.

You shook your head violently, forgetting human language, and tried to crawl farther back onto the bed, but Gojo gently cradled your head and put his wounded wrist to your parched lips. For a second your eyes grew big with fright, but when you felt the warm blood in your mouth, you didn't go mad - on the contrary, you obediently closed your eyes, and, gently wrapping your hands around his forearm, you pressed his wrist closer and began to drink.

Your sips were not greedy - on the contrary, you did it slowly, albeit mesmerized, unable to pull away. He was gently stroking your head the whole time, but you could not recognize the tender words he whispered to you, soothing you. You didn't know shame at that moment - the sorcerer had to bring you back to your senses right after an exhausting mission, though it was you who should have taken care of him. 

Somehow finding the strength to pull away from him, you couldn't resist and gently licked the last drop that flirtatiously drew you in. You were alarmed to see and realize that his wound had quickly healed right before your eyes. "The café is closed for the day," he purred, wrapping his arms around your waist and plopping you on the bed. "Come back tomorrow. Just not before afternoon. Owner needs his sleep," Gojo laughed softly, kissing your face sleepily. Seeing you in that state had made his heart clench with cold dread and worry shroud his thoughts, but seeing you now, relaxed in his arms and care, all was well again.

You burrowed your nose into the top of his mussed head in gratitude. He sighed tiredly but contentedly, snuggling closer to you - he didn't even have the energy to change his clothes. His relaxed body grew heavy, and feeling the soft sheets beneath him and your soft body next to him, he closed his eyes. "Have you picked out a dress yet?" he murmured, stroking the watch on your wrist.

"Mmm... No. Not yet," you mumbled back, stroking the back of his head and smiling stupidly as his body shuddered.

"How would you feel about... having the ceremony private?" he was cautious at first, but sensing your smile, he got dreamy. "Somewhere deep in the woods or on the shore of a wild beach... We'll put up an arch of flowers, set up a table, cover it with a white tablecloth... And you'll be in a white dress and I'll wear a suit, maybe even style my hair... But don't get your hopes up too high," he snorted, pinching your side, making you laugh. "It'll just be you, me, and the priest. And whoever else is up there watching us from above..."

"Sounds like a plan," you whispered, kissing his hot forehead - he was overcome with not painful, but embarrassed fever. "Tired?" you asked gently, massaging his shoulders.

"Yeah...," he exhaled softly, almost moaning at the feel of your hands on his body.

"Always amazed at how powerful cursed sorcerer can be."

"Yeah, yeah, sure," he muttered almost resentfully, pressing his face harder against your chest. "We may be stronger than those hunters of yours, but we're not stronger than the voidrunners."

You chuckled, hearing the childish annoyance in his voice. "I wasn't talking about power in the literal sense. It's just... If hunters have always had and will always have the ability to get rid of demons by finishing off a Diomorphea, then you're fighting creatures that are spawned by humans themselves... It's like fighting the natural element."

You frowned, trying to realize the gravity of your words, for Gojo had gone quiet in your arms. "That thought once drove my best friend mad and then killed him," he admitted indistinctly, remembering Suguru. Gojo remembered vividly and soberly that he had killed Suguru himself - the sorcerer still couldn't find forgiveness for himself, but sanity would occasionally return and broadcast that Geto had been killed by the acts of his own obsession, and it didn't matter who the executioner was. "It almost drove me crazy, too. I've spent my entire conscious life trying to find a humane way to stop that cursed mechanism, but I still haven't found it. I won't say I gave up," he murmured quietly, guiltily into your neck, snuggling against you as if he was afraid you'd run away upon realizing he could be so weak. "I just didn't care at some point."

"Why?" you asked quietly, trying not to scare away his vulnerability by enclosing her in a soft but firm embrace.

Gojo snorted irritably under his breath, feeling shy. He couldn't bear the thought of having to say it out loud, and he was hoping you'd figure it out and save him from the embarrassment. "Once I realized that even in a world like this, I still could be happy," he murmured, and then he stopped talking - he'd had enough revelations for one day. You didn't laugh at his confession, but you couldn't suppress a silly, blissful smile - his words, spoken from the heart, and his loving embrace made you forget for a moment that you had to leave.

The conversation died down by itself - you stopped in mid-sentence without saying good night to each other, as if tomorrow the conversation would resume where it had left off. Gojo's soft words became even quieter, and then became a tired sniffle. His breathing became even and deep, but he didn't let you out of his arms for a moment - you raised yourself on your elbow, stroking his hair and kissing the top of his head, and the deeper he fell asleep, the more feverishly you did it. You couldn't hold back dark tears anymore when he murmured something in his sleep, pulling you closer.

You had to stand next to him like a shadow again - slipping out of his embrace, you went to the closet without turning around and opened it as quietly as possible. You took out a dark bundle and crept into the bathroom, quietly locking yourself in.

The dusty uniform remembered every wound. As you put it on, there was not a single thought in your head. No bitterness, no fear, no excitement. Once again dressed in black, you picked up the heavy mask with the respirators, and, leaning it against your face, you obediently waited for the silent click. There was no one beside you, and you didn't even have anyone to blame for it - you'd done your best for it. Slowly you lifted your heavy gaze and stared at yourself in the small, cloudy, scratched mirror. Trying to convince yourself that you could forget about all the loss and pain now to avoid defeat, you lifted your chin. Clenching your fists, you told yourself of your own strength. If the gods were favorable, you would fulfill your destiny.

With a harsh exhale, you looked away from the mirror and stepped out of the bathroom. You were about to step out and disappear, but your heart protested, thumping painfully against your ribs. You turned around, looking at Gojo with tenderness and guilt smoldering in your eyes. He had already started frowning and groping the sheets next to him, even in his sleep realizing that something was missing. Tiptoeing over to him, you crouched down on your knees and gently brushed his disheveled hair away from his face - he mumbled something sleepily in response. "I'm sorry, boxy," you whispered in a shaky voice - you could barely make out his beautiful face because of the tears frozen in his eyes. "But I gotta go," you tried to justify yourself. You leaned your lips against his warm forehead - the kiss that was meant to be brief and timid, lasted forever.

You left the room with ragged breathing and a trembling soul, but your gait was firm and sure. You passed the rooms where the people you once loved slept, but your heart stopped whimpering. Because you had commanded it, and it dared not disobey. When you left the minka, you quickly ran down the stairs, not looking around.

"I knew it," Ieiri hissed into your back, and you felt cold inside. You turned around slowly - despite the tone she'd thrown at you, she looked ordinarily indifferent. She held a cigarette in her lowered hand, but it seemed to you that she was standing there barely for a smoke break. "Are you at it again? You just got back, and you're running away again?" her voice didn't ooze malice, but there was resentment lurking in it, despite the uncaring expression on Ieiri's face.

You smiled guiltily, shifting from foot to foot, and walked back to the porch. You still had time until the evening of twenty-fifth, so you could afford to linger... For a little while.

You sat down on the stairs and stared dazedly at the grass. Ieiri squinted her eyes and sat down beside you. "Got a cigarette?" you asked, scratching the back of your head awkwardly.

Shoko rolled her eyes and handed you a cigarette from the pack and a lighter. "You can't lie at all, you know that?" she snorted, looking at the light of the flame.

"Ya the first person who's ever figured me out," you shrugged, taking a puff of smoke. The cold twilight whispered something through the lips of the forest nearby.

"It was clear from the look on your face when I asked you about your plans for the future," Shoko gritted through her teeth - your guilty look wasn't enough to make her feel any better. At her words, you chuckled wistfully, flicking the ash off your cigarette, causing Ieiri to look down uncertainly. "Look, can't you... just stay?"

You looked up at her, and the woman's heart, which it thought was frozen and encased in ice, skipped a beat. The desperate look of a human, a guardian, who was ready to protect what was dear to them with all their strength, no matter what it cost them. She realized you couldn't stay. "Y/N," she worried, grabbing your shoulder. "What did he do?"

"Nothing," you laughed, wrapping your head around and squeezing her hand that was on your shoulder. "Ieiri, it's more like I fucked up," you furrowed your eyebrows, still smiling. You really should have never let that boy near you - you were afraid of taking his heart with you. But there was nothing you could do about it now. "Ya just... Don't say anything to him, 'kay?" you asked quietly, embarrassed. Shoko pressed her lips together and didn't say a word to your request - she knew she couldn't promise you that.

You sat silently for another minute, perhaps an hour - time stood still around, and while you stared up at the clear, starry sky, Shoko stared at you. "I have to go," you announced suddenly to Ieiri, rising. The woman was confused - she didn't know how to act. She only watched you walk away.

Her insides went up in flames as you turned around and gave a shy giggle. "Ieiri... can we… uh, hug?"

Dazed, looking at you as if you were a ghost, she nodded uncertainly. Shortening the distance, you put your hands on her shoulders first – it seemed to you they were shaking - and then pulled her against you, resting your chin on her shoulder. Shoko stood, unsure of how she should respond - it would have been better if you just run away like you always did. Feeling a traitorous pinch in her eyes, she first weakly hugged you back, and then squeezed her arms around you in a way that nearly broke your bones. You gave a surprised, hoarse chuckle - you hadn't realized she had so much strength in her before.

You pulled away from her a little, and gave her a warm look to let her know that it was time for you to go. Shoko stood silent, trying to find the last words she could squeeze out of her.

'Get lost?

'Come back soon?

'Take care of yourself?'

"See you," she blurted out on a shaky breath, and you, enveloped in momentary amazement, laughed, backing away slowly.

"See ya," you chirped back at her, winking. Ieiri watched helplessly as you turned and walked on, leaving them all behind - your silhouette growing smaller and lost in the shadows of the large columns, as if you were a shadow yourself. You turned off the main road and into the forest, and after an eternity, somewhere in the distance, the sky flashed with purple flames, making Shoko's eyes blur.

[Void; timeless]

As you stepped into the void, you felt a gaze on you, scrutinizing and threatening. You looked around sharply, and there was no one in sight against the purple horizon - you involuntarily raised your eyes to the deep, dark sky, and you thought you were being looked at in return. You clenched your teeth and took another cautious look at your surroundings, and slowly strode across the vast, empty expanse.

You didn't know which way to go, but it seemed to you that whichever way you went, sooner or later you'd run into Rei. He'd been waiting a long time for this opportunity, too. Black sand crunched beneath your heavy boots, and the cold whipped at your face every time you dared to look around. Apparently, the demon was taunting you, making you freeze and hesitate.

When you remembered the demon's words about the terms of your meeting, your pride resisted. You cringed in disgust when his sweet voice came back to your ears through the memories - you shook your head fervently, trying to shake it off. You could wander like this for days or weeks, if you had the time. Now you were ready to grab your pride by the throat and strangle it - you couldn't let him die.

You stopped and knelt down slowly, never changing your gaze - it was still heavy and determined. The wind that appeared out of nowhere gently mussed your hair, but immediately disappeared, silencing the void before its master once more. "Good girl," Rei murmured, standing a few feet away from you. The demon was clearly pleased with you, with the way you'd accepted your fate when he'd tried to take everything from you that was in one human.

Your head snapped up, and you exhaled raggedly. You could barely control yourself - that bastard was still in your sister's body, as if he'd deliberately mocked your heart. All you could do for her was put her soul to rest by ripping her body out of that rotten creature's hands.

"Relocate."

You thought you were going to end up right behind him because that's where you were aiming, but you were the one who was grabbed by the scruff of the neck and thrown into the cold sand. "Not so fast," he warned softly, smiling.

You raised yourself on trembling arms - you weren't tired, you weren't afraid, but there was a rage inside you that made you unable to hear even the voice of the creature inside. Rising to your feet, you were dumbfounded - a sticky chill enveloped your soul when you saw no one. You turned from side to side, all the while worrying about your back, but no one ever hit it.

You squinted as you heard a quiet, almost imperceptible rustling. The sudden wind that came from nowhere knocked the air out of your lungs, and as you tried to catch your breath, you saw the sand flying upward - sharp as glass dust, it scattered around, digging into your body and eyes, you whimpered quietly, briefly in pain, and covered your face with your palm, defending yourself. One blow to the side and you were no longer able to stand on your feet, falling to the ground again. You tried to look for the demon in the sandstorm, but it was obscured by the fact that in addition to Rei's gaze, you felt another one on you, which confused you, making you doubt which side the blow would come from. Time after time you absorbed the pain from the demon's attacks that came all over your body, but each time you rose to your feet, hoping to get a glimpse of him. "Why don't you just give up?" you stiffened when you heard a familiar voice - it wasn't Rei at all. It was your brother approaching you through the sharp sand. You recoiled in horror; your mind abruptly pierced by another sarcastic word.

"You were always so much weaker than my kids," you tearfully turned around and exhaled quietly when you saw Frank. You shook your head, looking at one and then the other.

"Don't ya dare," you muttered, staring through the pain at the center of the storm, but all you got in response was laughter. The faces of your loved ones faded into a haze, vanishing, but you didn't feel any better - he played you any way he wanted, and you could not do nothing with it.

Your whole body whimpered from the blows - each heartbeat painfully thumping against what were most likely broken ribs. It wasn't even a battle of tactics or strategy, but of endurance. Rei wore you down, breaking limbs time after time, forcing you to devote all your energy to healing them, cutting off your ability to strike back.

You didn't expect anything, fighting in the open in a place where there was nothing but sand. You'd always killed quietly and from behind - that was your main advantage, but now you were exposed and without an ace up your sleeve. Instead of running away, you went into the open field for one reason only.

Looking at you through the storm, Rei couldn't suppress a smile. He liked to see you lost and helpless, and he stalled as long as he could, enjoying the view instead of finishing you off quickly and putting you out of your misery. The demon even laughed at the thought - put you out of your misery? Never. As he approached you like a shadow, he was pleasantly surprised that you turned in his direction, staring, even though you couldn't see him.

"Shading."

The demon hummed thoughtfully, the sand stopped its swirl and hung in the air for a moment, falling to the ground in a heavy waterfall. He turned around slowly, trying to sense you - you were standing right in front of him, and for a moment you thought he saw you, for he was looking at you, but his gaze was unfocused as if he were looking at the horizon.

When he turned his back on you, you breathed out a silent sigh of relief as you summoned your dagger - Rei turned around abruptly, and you couldn't breathe. His face contorted into a fanatical grin, and he grabbed you by the throat, pulling you out of the shadows as you struggled weakly - your hand with a dagger remained motionless above his head. Your eyes began to blur, and the only thought in your mind was that he had known where you were all along. "Footprints, sweetheart," he barked in your face - you slowly lowered your dimming gaze to the ground. Indeed, there were your footprints. "How many times have I taught you to rely on your surroundings?" he muttered, squeezing his hand harder on your throat. Your limbs weakened - you, no longer resisting, went limp. Your hand dropped, and your only defense fell out of your slumped palm - the dagger fell into the sand with a thud of steel.

Watching it with eyes wide with delight, Rei chuckled. It still wasn't enough - to kill you, it wasn't enough to lure you into the void, it was necessary to force you to give up your human form so that you couldn't hide your alien heart. You were impossible to kill as a human, but the dioreact inside you was quite mortal. It didn't seem fair to the demon - he was standing in front of you, exposing his true nature, albeit against his will, and his heart was vulnerable. He wrinkled his nose in disgust - you couldn't even take advantage of that. He hissed angrily and threw you to the ground, and stepped on your spine, making you whimper in pain before you could get up again.

Since the morning of December twenty-fourth, Gojo's heart had been whimpering. He tried to put that uneasy feeling down to the anniversary of his best friend's death, but the anxiety would not leave him. By evening, when his palms began to sweat just because he was breathing, he had to call off the mission to find the curse and return home. As soon as he saw you, a feverish shiver immediately left his body.

But even as he fell asleep with you in his arms, the sorcerer felt his heart ache through the sweet slumber. The dreams flashed before his eyes, and he couldn't get a clear picture - all he could make out was your face. His hand unconsciously tried to fumble for you beside him, and when he failed to do so, he jumped up, waking as if from a nightmare - he gasped, putting his hand to his frantically pounding heart. His hands became numb when he didn't see you around - you could have gone to the bathroom or you could have gotten a cup of water, but he wasn't thinking straight. After checking the room and bathroom, he ran out into the hallway, swinging all the doors open and calling your name desperately.

When he ran into the kitchen in utter doom, he ran into Ieiri, who was sitting at the table - surprisingly, there wasn't even any alcohol in front of her. She was blankly drilling the tabletop with tired eyes, lost in her thoughts - she hadn't noticed him or his anxiety. "Shoko...," he called out uncertainly, stepping closer to her.

She stirred tiredly and stared at Gojo - something bitter flashed in her eyes, and she wiped her face with her hand wearily. "Worked up a sweat...," she exhaled, rising from her chair. "I'm going to bed."

"Have you seen Y/N?" he asked in a broken voice, staring at her back.

Ieiri stiffened, ratted herself out completely. "How am I supposed to know where she's been hanging around...," she muttered through gritted teeth. "Maybe she ran away again. Rachel said she does that a lot."

"No!" the sorcerer pleaded, running up to her and blocking her escape routes with his body. "I don't believe it," he stated firmly, watching angrily as his friend couldn't raise her eyes to him. "Not now, not with me. She couldn't do that."

"Are you even sure you know her?" laughed Shoko bitterly, shaking her head in disbelief. She couldn't see him - she didn't know the whole truth, but he was the reason you had to leave. And in order to save his already cracked heart, she should have kept quiet.

Gojo froze in grief-stricken amazement, biting his lip. He still wasn't sure he knew you well, and he was ready to curse himself for it, though it wasn't his fault. "You know where she is," he stated in a quiet, cold tone. "Just tell me."

Looking at him blankly, she jerked her shoulder, throwing his arms off of her. "In the void," with her words, Gojo struggled to stay on his feet. He tried to pick out a hundred reasons why you went there in the middle of the night without saying goodbye, but none were enough. He laughed maniacally, quietly, thinking you'd just resumed raiding alone, just because you could. Hiding his face in his hands, he continued laughing, and Ieiri didn't even dare touch him lest she awaken the madness.

The sorcerer went silent abruptly, and Shoko felt cold inside. He slowly pulled his hands away from her face, and she cringed when she saw his blank, lifeless, cruel face. He sharply started from where he stood - Shoko rushed after him. The hallway resounded with attempts to summon sanity with Ieiri's voice, but the sorcerer, once inside Megumi's bedroom, literally dragged him sleeping out of bed, tearing him away from his pregnant wife.

"Are you completely nuts...?" sleepily muttered Megumi, pulling his arm out irritably.

"Take me there!" Gojo ordered with a sharp shout.

Megumi frowned, examining his teacher for craziness. "Where should I take you?" he asked, not understanding.

"In the void!"

Fushiguro's sleepy eyes suddenly became clear and surprised. He opened his mouth, but after thinking about something, he closed it back up. "I can't," he managed to say, and his anxiety settled into the souls of everyone in the room.

Danielle, holding her stomach, leaned her back against the wall and watched them with tear-filled eyes, frowning her eyebrows - without even knowing what was happening, she could feel the growing pain. Megumi watched intently as Gojo went insane, unable to do anything about it. Ieiri fought the urge to touch the sorcerer and the urge to leave him alone - she didn't know which evil would be worse. "You know you didn't go through isolation. You can't go in there..."

"I know!" he shouted in a broken voice that quickly changed to a whisper. "I know it. I know," he cursed you for never believing in him and for not putting him through your ability to let you open the boundaries of a new, alien world to him. He felt useless and helpless, and the thought of you being out there all alone made him feel sick.

Megumi and Ieiri looked at each other hopelessly. "I'll... I'll look for her, okay?" assured Fushiguro inconsolably, and, hesitating, patted his teacher on the shoulder. Gojo couldn't even give a nod in response - he stood like a living statue with numb limbs.

"Let's go. You won't help her like that," Shoko called out to him quietly - Gojo was scaring Danielle with his appearance. He nodded briefly, threw Dany an apologetic look, and left the room. He followed Megumi, that he managed to pull on his voidrunner's uniform along the way - he never thought of the day coming when he would rely on his student rather than himself.

Fushiguro practically ran out of the minka, and as Gojo was about to run after him, Megumi stopped him by pressing his palm into his chest. "You come any closer, you'll go blind," warned Megumi, but the man was already faintly aware. The sorcerer was being devoured by an insatiable disgust - it was sinking its rotten teeth into his skin, reminding him how pathetic he was at this moment. As soon as Megumi was far enough away from them, Gojo closed his eyes - the purple flash leaked even through his closed eyelids, painting imaginary pictures where you both were still happy.

As your body shuddered beneath his foot, Rei picked up your dagger from the ground - it weighed less than a feather, as if he were holding nothing at all. He exhaled irritably, thinking about how much trouble that toothpick had caused him - it was in your imprisonment that you'd learned to materialize dark energy, albeit into something so small and insignificant, but that dagger had freed you from your shackles and helped you escape. But Rei felt jealousy in addition to irritation. None of the demons and dioreacts in general had been able to subdue dark energy the way you had - none of them had ever dreamed of materializing it. He was angry at your superiority over them.

Rei clenched his teeth as he put your dagger away and took a step away from you. You inhaled hoarsely as you felt relief around your back and lungs, gasping for air greedily. The lowest emotions of anger, rage, and jealousy made his presence even darker, and he stepped around you and squatted down in front of you, grabbing your hair, forcing you to look into his eyes. There was no fear on your face, and what pushed him over the edge of insanity - it lacked the desire to escape. "Why are you always so naughty?" he whispered with bitterness in his voice, leaning his forehead against yours. "We could have been happy," while he was pouring out his black soul to you, you desperately tried to fumble for the dagger in the sand - when he saw this, he grinned frantically and clenched his fingers tighter on your hair, almost tearing it out. "Did you lose something, sweetheart?"

Your gaze went from doomed to determined. "Nothing I can't steal on a later date, lieber," you spat out, and the realization nearly suffocated him, making him stiffen - he jerked to the side and felt a sharp pain an inch from his heart. If it hadn't been for his reaction and your emotions surrendering your intentions, he'd be dead by now.

Taking advantage of his stupor, you jumped to your feet and stepped back, never turning your back on him and keeping your dagger raised at chest level. The demon grasped at the bleeding spot and was curbed by a storm of different, incompatible feelings - he admired you and was ready to kill you. He wanted to subdue you and give you freedom. Rei rose slowly to his feet, realizing that the cards had been laying face down all this time - you looked brave and... peaceful.

You were completely alone. With a steady exhale, you slowly closed your eyes. One by one, the thoughts faded away like echoes. There was no excitement inside you, only a boundless emptiness in which you were alone with your goal.

"Sunshine.'

'Adoptee.'

'Young lady.'

'Voidrunner, killer from the north, demon, alien, or ordinary human - none of that matters at all. I'll be by your side, whatever you choose.'

A life devoid of choice is what it seemed to you. You drowned yourself in pity and injustice, refusing love. You never let your essence overpower you of your own free will. You constantly denied and rejected it, despite its attempts to get closer. You were both victims of circumstance, trapped in the same cage. You always thought that once you gave it control, it'd be like a mad dog off the chain, but now it stood behind you, hugging your body as your struggled to rise from your knees.

And all of them, in one way or another, in different ways and words, were trying to get through to you, to tell you that you weren't a monster. The irony brought tears to your eyes - how was it that they had loved that creature inside before you?  

You deftly but gently twisted the dagger in your hand, cupped the hilt in your palm, and slowly opened your eyes. You were completely alone.

But there were several similar ones standing next to your shadow.

"You don't think this is going to work, do you?" asked Rei with a sneer, pulling his hand away from his wound - it was already healed.

"Shading."

It lifted you up and put you on your feet. It stood beside you and devoured your common tormentor with its whole being. You could hear its slurred, inarticulate whispers - it rumbled in your head, but you felt no more pain. Dark lines crawled up your fingers, arms, shoulders, and down to the ground - you almost wanted to laugh when you saw the bewilderment on the demon's face.

He looked around in confusion as the darkness devoured the ground beneath your feet, as it ate your surroundings - it swallowed tons of sand and air with ease, climbing to the heavens and obscuring the horizon. You lifted your chin - your pride was coming back to you, albeit shattered. You found yourself alone in the pitch blackness, impenetrable and endless.

You had one advantage over Rei. He had lived so long in human lands that he had come to identify with and live as a human - of course, he thought of himself as the perfect version without flaws that ordinary people should worship, but the fact remained that he had lived in a human body and walked this earth for many thousands of years, forgetting the place that used to be his home. On the other hand, there was you, who still hadn't experienced life and had yet to forget about the homelands you had never been to. It was time to remind him.

"Shading."

Your image vanished into the shadows, leaving Rei all alone in the middle of a vast black field without earth or sky. The demon couldn't feel whether he was falling or floating, but he couldn't feel any support at all, your darkness had eaten everything. He was surprised at his own shriek of pain when from below came a blow to his back with such force that it broke his spine. "More!" he exclaimed, and spread his arms as if he were giving himself up to be eaten by God's punishment. You couldn't hear his cries, couldn't see his body - you blended into the void, but somehow you still knew where to hit.

You and your entity struck blow after blow, clutching the dagger in the same hand, putting everything you'd ever had into them - revenge, longing, sadness, happiness, love. Rei's body was tossing from side to side, and even as he involuntarily sobbed painfully, he never stopped laughing. His body was covered with deep wounds that dipping out all his hidden sins - at some point they stopped healing.

You didn't feel the need to breathe, you weren't tired, you couldn't feel your hands, only your dagger and your creature guided you to your main goal. Swinging the dagger as hard as you could, you plunged the point into whatever was before your nonexistent eyes - the darkness dissipated and you sighed hoarsely, holding the hilt tighter in your hands and thrusting it deeper into flesh. You sat before Rei, who was sprawled on the sand, your lips quivering with fury and disbelief. You stared at his peaceful face, and somehow you couldn't let him go so easily, even though the hilt of your dagger was already sticking out of his rotten heart, and there was nothing more you could do about it.

The demon turned his head slowly and gave you a blank stare, untainted by the desire for another's torment. You were incredibly beautiful - you'd given up your human form and most of you had been consumed by darkness, but he wrinkled his nose in disappointment, unable to feel your bare alien heart. But that's what this was all about.

You shook your head faintly in bewilderment, waiting for him to say something. You could still feel the gaze of the heavens on your back, and a small, momentary shiver ran through your body, but you shook it off. "You know, sweetheart," you couldn't recognize his voice - calm and soft, not a shred of arrogance in it. He spent the rest of his strength in gently leaning his hand against your cheek. "Your human didn't make a promise to me at all," he saw the horror envelope you - you could no longer contain your trembling, the fires of sanity and panic struggling in your eyes. "I wasn't even there," you frantically shook your head in denial as the eyes of the heavens literally dug into your back - you thought your wounds were about to open.

Rei slowly lowered his gaze once more. He smiled faintly, sensing your beautiful heart, which opened to the world because of emotions you couldn't control - primal fear and the desire to protect while remaining helpless. You thought he nodded weakly, and then looked into your eyes again. "Liebe," he whispered on his last exhale, pressing his palm harder against your cheek. "No matter what happens, you are my best artwork," the last words were whispered for him by the ashes that scattered across the infinite void. You buried your hands into the ground, still in disbelief - so broken those eyes saw you. Fear oozed out of you like sand from between your fingers. You couldn't stop the scream from coming out of your throat, and with tears in your eyes, you jumped up and ran to the first rift.

The purple light was blinding. You couldn't feel your feet and the way they sank into the sand, and you were breathing raggedly, sobbing aloud - you looked as if you'd never make it. As the glow from the rift scorched everything in your eyes, you reached your hand out, trying to get there as fast as you could - as the light engulfed you, you felt a faint jolt. You felt no pain - not dull, not sharp. When you found yourself in the middle of the night of the human world, among the trees that grew around Kyoto College, you slowly lowered your head. Seeing the thin point of the silver blade that protruded between your heaved collarbones, you smiled weakly. You closed your eyes, letting go of your strength, and fell face first into the wet snow, your body hidden from the distant stars by the whispering branches.

The bones of silence broke under the crunch of snow. The eyes of heaven stood just a few steps away, watching you die. "I'm sorry, Y/N," came a familiar voice with genuine longing and sympathy. "You could make no mistakes and still lose."

next ⊳

[eolewyn1010]

Current state of mind: Uuuuuurrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhh.

Things that went good:

I cleaned the kitchen and both bathrooms, and got my folks to help me with the stuff I don't like (vacuum-cleaning). Only thing I didn't do are the windows, but they'll have to wait for better weather.

I finally wrote my professor another overdue mail.

Changed the bedding! Is there anything better than sleeping in a freshly made bed?

I made egg salad.

I'm making wild garlic butter.

Did the laundry!

Got those photos that I need to write some job applications.

Took care of my health insurance bullshit despite it scaring me. I'mma get a good grade in adulting, something that's both normal to want and possible to achieve.

Things that went not so good:

When we were almost done with cleaning, the vacuum cleaner broke. Admittedly, it was a really cheap thing and my mother had already grown to resent the acquisition. Still, inconvenient. My sis and I brushed out the entire hallway carpet flooring on hands and knees, and now we know why people invented vacuum cleaners.

I'm in a real working block regarding my stupid thesis. This is not good. I'm trying to keep up with the literature, but I really need to get over myself and tackle my newspapers again.

Things to do today / tomorrow:

Go buy groceries with my mom, including some travel snacks for the train ride on Wednesday. Before that: Ask friend what we're gonna cook so I can bring ingredients.

Make tomato butter. Tonight, we shall feast!

Bake ~something~ out of cream cheese and puff pastry; that stuff needs to go before it runs away.

Take out the trash. No, I don't mean myself.

The godforsaken dishessssssss.

Transmit some of my reading materials to my phone so I can at least spend the train ride doing something useful.

Things to do these days:

Go visit my friend. Perhaps set their local bus station on fire because the bus connections I'm getting for the trip back when I look it up online are weird as fuck, and it's always a 50/50 whether they can bring me all the way to the train or not.

Set the people in parliament on fire who keep Zeitumstellung alive because What The Fuck.

Maybe try out yoga or something; I really need to chill out.

Get my bike out of the basement. Winter break's up; we're done lazing around!

Drive to the furniture store and buy my new closet. It's for my clothes, not for my sexuality or gender.

[livingincolorsagain]

for @fiprobably’s prompt: Non-AU: Sam and Bucky going shopping for groceries. Except Sam is away and on video call with Bucky, who is the one actually doing the shopping. Them arguing back and forth because why can't Bucky just find that specific orange juice brand Sam likes and how can Sam want to get snacks that high in calories they're supposed to be snacks not protein bars and Bucky is so goddamn insistent on the canned peaches and Sam isn't having any of it there is literally fresh peaches over there—

Bucky doesn’t like grocery shopping. He hates it, actually. He would rather do the laundry, or the dishes. He loves doing work in the backyard, or cleaning up the garage. Anything but the groceries.

That’s why it was mostly Sam’s job. Sam doesn’t mind it, Bucky is certain he actually likes it. He writes down a list and plays his shopping playlist—because Sam has a playlist for everything—and he pauses his music to make small talk with everyone and gets a lot of free samples and freshly baked goods for it.

But Sam has been running a fever since he came back from his latest mission a few days ago, and despite the fact that he keeps saying he’s fine and he can do it, he actually can’t stay awake for more than a few hours at a time, and even going to the bathroom is an effort, so leaving the house is out of question.

Bucky can’t really hold off grocery shopping any longer. The fridge is starting to look kind of sad, and the pantry is running low on everything, and if Sam was to actually leave the bed and check the kitchen he would side-eye Bucky to hell, because Bucky, you’re a Wilson now and no Wilson household should look like that.

So, after he gives Sam his pills and checks his temperature one last time, Bucky puts his best pair of sweatpants, Sam’s old sweatshirt and his bravest face on, and makes the short drive to the grocery store.

It’s a random Wednesday morning, so the parking lot isn’t full. Bucky grabs a cart and pulls out the list. He’s barely inside the store when his phone starts vibrating. He pulls it out of his pocket, frowning with worry when he sees it’s Sam video-calling him.

“Everything’s okay?”

Sam’s face is half buried in the pillow, his one visible eye barely open, and when he says, “I’m making sure you’re getting the right stuff,” his voice is croaked and small.

Bucky snorts even as his heart twists fondly.

Sam makes a small noise of protest. “You always get the wrong orange juice.”

“It happened once.”

“And it was awful.”

“They were out of the brand you like, and it was years ago, can you let it go?”

“It’s burned into my brain.”

Bucky lowers the phone as he bites back a smile. “Jesus, fine.”

So, that’s how it goes. Sam supervises as Bucky goes from one aisle to another, arguing about every single item Bucky chooses, because no, Bucky, that’s the worst kind of beans and get the whole wheat spaghetti instead and wait, I can’t see, go back. No, that's too far. Go back a little. A bit down. Y’know what? Just take a picture and send it to me.

Bucky can’t stop smiling.

“Don’t forget the snacks,” Sam says, yawning. Alpine moews in the background. “Bring Alpine some snacks too.”

“She already has a lot of snacks.”

Sam lifts his head a little off the pillow and turns it away from the camera to what Bucky assumes is Alpine napping on Bucky’s side of the bed. “Daddy says no snacks for you, baby.”

Bucky sputters. “I didn’t say— fine!”

Sam smiles, burying his face back into the fluffy pillow. “That’s what I thought.”

Bucky shakes his head, but he can’t stop smiling, because Sam’s eyes are drooping and he’s fighting it. “Go take your nap, I’m almost done anyway.”

Sam stubbornly opens his eyes wider. “No.”

“I only have the snacks and cat litter left, there’s no way I’m gonna mess that up.”

“But—“

“Sam.”

“Fine,” Sam says. “Love you.”

Bucky’s smile grows. “Love you, too.”

“Salt and vinegar chips.”

“I know, Sam.”

“Just making sure.”

“I’m hanging up.”

He hears Sam laughing just as the call cuts off.

check out this post if you wanna send me a prompt!

[angelictroublemaker]

Seeking housemates in Minnesota!

I've been living at my childhood home, a hobby farm in Minnesota, taking care of my dad. Soon my dad will be moving to assisted living, along with my mom who is moving there from the nursing home.

I'll be staying at the farm and looking after the animals. I'd rather live here with other people, as it's safer and more fun. I have multiple disabilities which make managing a whole farm rather difficult on my own. I've had a couple of seizures which make it safer for me to have people around me. Minnesota is one of the better places to live right now in the US and this could be a good opportunity for someone to live here.

So, if you know of anyone that would like a nice place to live, please direct them my way, especially queer and trans people looking for a relatively safe place. There is a lot of space in the house (3 full bathrooms, 4 bedrooms), and plenty of outdoor space.

I have one cat and one dog in the house, and outside there are a few sheep, one aging horse that is strictly a pasture pet, and some guinea fowl. Amenities include a dishwasher, laundry, wifi, some streaming services, 2 gas fireplaces. This is a wonderful place for hobbies such as gardening, woodworking, fiber arts, baking, etc. In addition to the house there are some outbuildings and a nice garden shed. Opportunities for fishing, golf, biking abound in the region.

Couples (+) are welcome as are kids. There is a good elementary school just a few miles away.

The house needs a bit of work, but overall it's very nice and peaceful. One thing I do contend with here is bugs. There is no central AC but we can do window AC units when needed. Sometimes the dog barks in an annoying manner (we are working on it). I could use help with mowing, weeding, cutting brush.

You could live here for cheap as I mostly am looking for company and help. I can't live with smokers due to my disabilities. I have lived with roommates for most of my life and can provide references.

The house is rural but only a few miles from the nearest shopping area, and close to a small city. You would probably need to have a car, though we can get grocery delivery here.

My interests include watching TV shows and movies, gardening, science fiction, jigsaw puzzles, thrifting. I'm a queer woman in my 40s. I'm a rather extreme night owl.

If interested you can email me, sandphin at gmail dot com. Share this link with people you think might be interested!

[leyhejuhyunghan]

Today in the morning ate a meal with hamburger and sliced cheese and toast bread. Today is the Buddha’s birthday holiday and the teacher’s day. In the morning my mother made kimbab. In the afternoon ate lunch with kimbab. And drank coffee with milk. And washed with baking soda and served spring onion and chicory. And did laundry. And partly cleaned bathroom. Today my mother with younger brother did grocery shopping at the Costco. And did dishwashing. And ate Costco sushi. In the evening served oranges. And made fried-eggs with spring onion and salt and lemon extract. And ate dinner with fried-eggs with sliced cheese and Costco hotdog. And ate dessert with banana and orange. And did dishwashing. Listened to the radio radio hr-iNFO and YOU FM and the classical music on YouTube. Tomorrow in the afternoon will serve onion and potato and make soft tofu soup with mushroom. Will do dishwashing. Hope to see my boyfriend and near future husband Stephan Leyhe soon in the near future. Love him so much and thankful and loving mind for him and his parents and his elder brother and his family and his entire family for accepting me as their new family member. Have a safe and good day.

[inhaledpie4]

What do trad women even do besides crying and fainting 24/7?

Between all the crying and fainting, it's actually difficult to get stuff done! I'd say I'm most productive after breakfast, but I'll give a short explanation so you can get an idea of my day-to-day.

Typical routine:

Wake up

Cry about the day ahead of me

Get up from the bed

Faint because of how cold it is

Put slippers and robe on

Tiptoe to the bathroom

Cry in front of the mirror because my body isn't the ideal sex doll ratio

Faint at how cold the sink water is, bashing my pretty little head on the counter

Wash the bloodstains off the robe while crying

Decide to take a hot shower, making sure my hair doesn't get wet

Step out of the shower and put on a bathrobe

Cover the bruise with makeup, natural style of course

Take the silk hair cap off and let hair down out from its protective hair style, usually a braid

Put on a touch of perfume and my pearl necklace

Tiptoe back to the bedroom and put on the dress I set aside the night before

Go to the kitchen to find my husband has already made himself coffee, apologize profusely with lots of tears for waking him up with the loud bang from before

Husband smacks me on the bum and asks me not to worry about it, I'll just have to make up for it later

Quickly make breakfast, my husband's favourite, eggs and special oatmeal. While that's cooking I unload the dishwasher

Wake the children up and feed them, then change the baby's diaper

Start running a bath for the oldest while I load the dishwasher, carrying the baby on my hip

Put the oldest in the bath and set the baby down in the playpen

Go downstairs to start a load of laundry, on the way up the stairs I faint from the effort

Wake up at the bottom of the staircase with a terrible headache. I hold back my tears and climb the stairs again, slowly this time

Then I alternate between playing with the kids, putting the baby down for a nap, and deep-cleaning each room using the top-down method, and preparing lunch

After lunch, the oldest goes down for a nap and I have time for a quick break to cry

My husband drives me to and from the grocery store

Change the baby's diaper once again before I start cooking my favourite one-pot, six-pan, 10-wok, 25-baking sheet dinner. It's super fast and easy!

After dinner, I do a little budgeting and faint again at how much I've been spending on eggs. I resolve to get chickens

I put the kids down to bed and please my husband before crying myself to sleep

This is all satire, if you couldn't tell. Real answer? I have never fainted in my life but I am a bit of a crybaby so I just persevere through the tears haha. Luckily, most of my tears are happy ones because my children are so sweet and cute and my husband is perfect but y'know... I really love my life

[divinedomesticity]

Bringing Back the Homemaker Schedules of the Past: A Guide to Organized Living

In our fast-paced, modern world, the art of homemaking often feels like a lost treasure. Yet, there's a timeless wisdom in the routines and schedules our grandmothers and great-grandmothers followed. From the 1950s housewives to the Amish communities of today, having designated days for specific tasks can bring structure, efficiency, and a sense of accomplishment to our daily lives. As homemakers, adopting these traditional schedules can help us get organized and reclaim the joy of a well-managed home.

The Timeless Wisdom of Daily Routines

In the 1950s, homemakers had a specific rhythm to their weeks. Each day was dedicated to a particular household task, creating a predictable and manageable routine. This approach not only ensured that all chores were completed but also brought a sense of order and purpose to each day. The Amish, known for their simple and effective lifestyles, continue to embrace these structured schedules, allowing them to maintain their homes and farms efficiently.

Embracing the Homemaker Schedule

By reintroducing a daily schedule into our lives, we can transform the way we manage our homes. Here’s a sample weekly schedule that reflects this traditional approach:

Monday: Laundry Day Start the week by tackling the laundry. Sorting, washing, drying, and folding can be a daunting task, but dedicating one day to it ensures it doesn’t pile up. Involve your children by teaching them to sort their clothes or fold simple items.

Tuesday: Baking Day Set aside Tuesdays for baking. Whether it’s bread, cookies, or muffins, baking can be a therapeutic and rewarding activity. Plus, it ensures you have fresh, homemade goodies for the week ahead. Get your little ones involved by letting them help with measuring and mixing.

Wednesday: Cleaning Day Deep cleaning can be overwhelming, but dedicating one day to it makes it more manageable. Focus on different areas of the house each week or tackle one major chore, like vacuuming, dusting, or scrubbing bathrooms. This routine keeps your home sparkling clean without feeling like an endless task.

Thursday: Errands Day Reserve Thursdays for running errands. Plan your grocery shopping, post office visits, and other out-of-the-house tasks on this day. This way, you can consolidate trips, save time, and reduce stress by knowing exactly when you’ll get these tasks done.

Friday: Organizing Day Use Fridays to organize and declutter. Tackle a different room or area each week, whether it’s the pantry, closets, or kids’ play areas. A little weekly organizing goes a long way in maintaining a tidy home.

Saturday: Family Day Dedicate Saturdays to family time. Plan fun activities, outings, or just relax together at home. This day is about bonding and creating cherished memories without the pressure of chores.

Sunday: Rest and Plan Sundays are for rest and reflection. Take it easy, enjoy a slower pace, and spend some time planning for the week ahead. This can include meal planning, reviewing your schedule, and setting goals.

Why This Approach Works

Predictability and Routine: Having a set day for each task creates a predictable routine that helps manage time and reduces stress.

Efficiency: Focusing on one major task each day prevents overwhelm and ensures that everything gets done without last-minute scrambling.

Family Involvement: Involving your children in daily tasks teaches them responsibility and the value of contributing to household chores.

Sense of Accomplishment: Completing specific tasks each day gives a sense of accomplishment and order, making homemaking more enjoyable.

Bringing It Home

Adopting these traditional schedules might seem old-fashioned, but they can be incredibly effective in our modern lives. As homemakers, we have the power to create a harmonious and organized environment for our families. By bringing back the schedules of the past, we can reclaim the art of homemaking and enjoy a more balanced, peaceful, and fulfilling life.

I hold it in my heart to share the wisdom of our grandmothers and the simplicity of the Amish. We can all create a beautiful schedule and enjoy the blessings of a well-ordered home, finding satisfaction in the daily rhythms that make homemaking a true labor of love.

With warmth and dedication,

Kimmi

[esters-notepad]

Today, I...

Took care of the 3y/o all day, alone

Cleaned the bathrooms

Changed and washed the towels

Put away a load of dry laundry

Went grocery shopping

Baked bread

Vacuum-cleaned the whole apartment

...so why do I feel like I got absolutely nothing done? That's a lot of things!

[megan-loves-surveys]

#60.

What color are your eyes? Green.

Is anyone you work with currently on maternity leave or vacation? Not that I know of. I was the last person to take time off for a holiday when I went to Vegas.

Favorite boy’s name? Nathaniel.

Baked macaroni and cheese or regular? Any, just gimme mac and cheese.

What’s the first thing you learned how to draw? No clue.

Name one of your friends’ children: Zachary, Ngawari's son. He's 15.

What was the name of your 5th grade teacher? -

How many hours do you work in a day? I usually work from 8:30am till about 2pm, so about 5 and a half hours.

Have you ever been to a casino? Yep. I was staying in a resort the other week in Vegas with a casino in it xD

Who wrote the last book you read? Dunno.

What’s your favorite food? Mac & cheese.

How far away do you live from the closest aquarium? I'm not sure how far away Kelly Tarlton's is.

Favorite girl’s name? May.

What’s the name of your favorite restaurant? Porterhouse Grill.

Are you in a relationship? If so, how long? Yep, for 3 years now!

Who in your family has a birthday in January? My cousin, on Jan 1.

When was the last time you lost power? How long was it out and the cause? I don't know the reason, it was in the middle of the night and lasted for maybe an hour.

Do you know any twins? No.

What’s your favorite flower? Sunflowers.

Pick 3 random colors: Blue, purple and green.

Would you ever dye your hair that color? I've done 2 out of 3 of them, and maybe I'd do green lol.

Do you own any underwear that color? Yep.

Do you drink alcohol? On occasion.

Do you use any food delivery services such as UberEats, DoorDash, etc? Does pizza count? Haha.

What color is your mailbox? Brown.

What age did you lose your virginity? 14.

Dogs or cats? Cats.

Do you know anyone who’s been to prison? Yes.

What’s one thing on your shopping list? Mother's Day present.

Where did you go on your last vacation? Las Vegas.

Have you ever been stuck in the mud? No.

What was the last thing you took a picture of? It was probably Mox lmfao.

Name someone you work with: Mark.

Chick-fil-A, Taco Bell or McDonald’s? McDonald's. We don't have the first one in NZ, and last time I tried to have Taco Bell my card wouldn't work in the EFTPOS machine so I walked out.

Did you ever get an allowance as a child? Yes, I got $20 a fortnight lol.

What food do you see the most of at baby showers? Dunno, I've only been to maybe two in my whole life.

Do you know the capital of your state? -

Have you ever rode on a motorcycle? No.

When’s the last time you ate any type of sweet? Yesterday, I had some Haribo.

Pizza rolls or bagel bites? Not had either.

Is the internet connection good where you live? It's fine.

Do you need to do laundry? Always it seems.

What’s your favorite scent? Citrus and that smell after it rains.

Have you ever lived in a hotel before? No.

What kind of pets does your grandmother have? -

Do you follow any type of trials? No?

What’s the last show you really got into that you have to wait for the next season of? None.

SpongeBob or Patrick? Patrick.

When’s the last time you saw fireworks? Hmm... NYE?

Have you ever witnessed a car accident? Not that I know of.

Do you own a pair of fuzzy socks? I own multiple xD

What kind of ice cream is your favorite? Cookies & cream.

Have you ever been skinny dipping? Yep.

Sprinkles or frosting? Why not both?

Do you like mushrooms? No.

How many tattoos do you have? 0.

Do you own any type of hand sanitizers? Sure.

Have you ever worked in a grocery store? No.

What’s your Subway order? I don't like Subway.

When was the last time you used the bathroom? About 45 minutes ago.

Do you know how to roller skate? No.

Can you read sheet music? No.

How old is your youngest sibling? I'm an only child.

Do you have an Amazon account? Yep.

What day is payday? Tuesday.

What’s one food your family has at Thanksgiving? -

Do you like painting? No.

Have you ever been swimming with dolphins? No.

What’s your favorite snack food? ANY kind of crunchy, savoury, salty snacks. Chips, popcorn, pretzels, rice crackers etc.

You’re watching Law & Order, is it the regular or SVU? SVU.

What were you doing last time it snowed? It doesn't snow where I live.

Do you have to sleep with a fan on? No.

Chapstick or lip gloss? Chapstick.

When was the last time you took a shower? Yesterday.

Do you know how to play basketball? No.

Name one thing you put on a salad: Mayo.

Do you own anything that’s your favorite color? Lots of things.

What’s the last thing you ordered from a Mexican restaurant? I don't go to them.

Do you carry a purse or a backpack? I have a handbag.

What kind of soda is your favorite? Coke Zero Sugar, though I've been drinking Fanta more lately.

Have you ever cut yourself shaving? Oh yeah.

Penguins or pandas? Pandas, but penguins are cute too.

Do you wear a ring on your finger? I wear multiple.

What are you doing? This survey, listening to music and posting on Discord. And keeping an eye on Mox, he's at the window lol.

Do you listen to your friends’ advice when they give it to you? Sure.

What’s the last kind of soup you ate? Chicken noodle soup for sure.

Do you currently have a sunburn? No. Surprisingly, I didn't get sunburnt in Vegas, I just got super tan instead lol.

Could you eat nothing but grilled cheese for a week straight? No, I'd get sick of it after a few days.

What are you listening to right now? Namie Amuro - To-day. But it's fading away as I type, next is Ayumi Hamasaki - tasky

Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? No.

Can you trust most people? Most people, no. Some people, yes.

Has anyone hurt or betrayed you recently? No.

Is your last ex still someone you care about? Do you still have feelings for your ex? No and no.

Are you someone’s best friend? I hope so.

Biggest annoyance in your life right now? My knee.

Have you spoken to your mother today? Yes.

Do you have any tattoo / piercings? No.

Latest you stayed up in the past week? 12:30am lol, I always fall asleep around then or a bit earlier these days.

Be honest, do you miss anyone? Yes.

What are your plans for tonight? Nothing much. I could go to to my boyfriend's place but my Mum is sick so I'd feel bad abandoning her.

Will tomorrow be better than today? Nah, it'll be about the same.

Are you the youngest person living in your house? Yes, human wise lol. Mox is 7 months old but he's a cat xD

Do you think you will be in a relationship three months from now? Yes!

Do you know anyone that smokes weed? Yep.

When did you last eat pizza? A few months ago.

Do you like your hair? Yep, though I need it dyed.

Have you graduated from high school? Yes.

Do you ever leave the house without make up on? I don't wear makeup, so yes.

Do you expect to be married in the next two years? No.

Did you receive a good morning text today? Yep, from my boyfriend xD

What’s most important in a relationship: honesty or trust? They both are kinda connected together, no?

Do you like to cuddle? Yep.

What time did you wake up this morning? About 8:30am.

What are you planning on doing after this survey? Talking on Discord and watching a YouTube video.

Is your ”love life” complicated? Not at all.

What ruined your day today? Nothing tbh, but my Mum's sick, so that sucks.

If you had to choose between a million dollars or to be able to change a regret, which would you chose? The million dollars, no question.

Where will you be 2 hours from now? Here.

Name the person that has honestly hurt you the most in life? No.

What were you doing at 8:00 a.m. this morning? Sleeping.

Have you kissed anyone with a tattoo before? Yep.

Why aren’t you in bed? It's too early for me.

Do you have any plans for tomorrow? No.

[suckitsurveys]

What color are your eyes? Green.

Is anyone you work with currently on maternity leave or vacation? No.

Favorite boy’s name? Brendon, Ezra, Eli, Alexander, Dylan

Baked macaroni and cheese or regular? I could go for either. Baked sounds amazing right now though.

What’s the first thing you learned how to draw? I have no idea.

Name one of your friends’ children: My close friends don’t have kids.

What was the name of your 5th grade teacher? Mr. Walker.

How many hours do you work in a day? 8. Sometimes more, sometimes less, but I am always scheduled for 8.

Have you ever been to a casino? Yup, a handful of times.

Who wrote the last book you read? I can’t remember the last book I read.

What’s your favorite food? Sushi.

How far away do you live from the closest aquarium? About 20-30 mins, depending on traffic.

Favorite girl’s name? Josephine, Cecilia, Alex, Stella, Alice

What’s the name of your favorite restaurant? Royal Sushi.

Are you in a relationship? If so, how long? Yes, for almost 14 years now.

Who in your family has a birthday in January? My mom.

When was the last time you lost power? How long was it out and the cause? It was somewhat recently and it was only for a few minutes because of a storm.

Do you know any twins? I do; my cousins are twins.

What’s your favorite flower? Gardenias.

Pick 3 random colors: Lavender, royal blue, red.

Would you ever dye your hair that color? Yes.

Do you own any underwear that color? Yes.

Do you drink alcohol? Very very rarely.

Do you use any food delivery services such as UberEats, DoorDash, etc? Yeah sometimes.

What color is your mailbox? White.

What age did you lose your virginity? 20.

Dogs or cats? Cats.

Do you know anyone who’s been to prison? Yes.

What’s one thing on your shopping list? Snacks for when Ellen is here.

Where did you go on your last vacation? I mean technically NYC.

Have you ever been stuck in the mud? I don’t think so.

What was the last thing you took a picture of? My kitty.

Name someone you work with: Eric.

Chick-fil-A, Taco Bell or McDonald’s? Taco Bell.

Did you ever get an allowance as a child? Not really.

What food do you see the most of at baby showers? I haven’t been to many, just the two I’ve thrown for my sister.

Do you know the capital of your state? Of course.

Have you ever rode on a motorcycle? No.

When’s the last time you ate any type of sweet? Last night.

Pizza rolls or bagel bites? Pizza rolls.

Is the internet connection good where you live? Sure.

Do you need to do laundry? Not at the moment.

What’s your favorite scent? Gardenia and rain.

Have you ever lived in a hotel before? Not lived, no.

What kind of pets does your grandmother have? I don’t have any grandparents.

Do you follow any type of trials? No.

What’s the last show you really got into that you have to wait for the next season of? SEVERANCE oh my goddddd I need it now.

SpongeBob or Patrick? Plankton.

When’s the last time you saw fireworks? On New Years Day probably.

Have you ever witnessed a car accident? Actually just yesterday. It was minor; a person was coming out of an alley way and was not looking and hit the car in front of me.

Do you own a pair of fuzzy socks? Yes.

What kind of ice cream is your favorite? Butter Pecan or Cookie Dough.

Have you ever been skinny dipping? Yes.

Sprinkles or frosting? I mean, both?.

Do you like mushrooms? LOVE mushrooms.

How many tattoos do you have? 11.

Do you own any type of hand sanitizers? Yes. That’s a habit i haven’t broken from the pandemic; I will ALWAYS have hand sanitizer on me.

Have you ever worked in a grocery store? I have not.

What’s your Subway order? I haven’t been to Subway in AGES but I used to get the sweet onion chicken with honey mustard. That doesn’t even seem the least bit appealing to me anymore. I much prefer James Johnathan’s or New Jersey Michael’s these days.

When was the last time you used the bathroom? A couple hours ago before I left for work.

Do you know how to roller skate? I did. I’d really like to get back into it.

Can you read sheet music? Nope.

How old is your youngest sibling? I am the youngest sibling.

Do you have an Amazon account? Yeah.

What day is payday? Every other Friday.

What’s one food your family has at Thanksgiving? My dad’s andouille sausage and cornbread stuffing.

Do you like painting? Sure.

Have you ever been swimming with dolphins? No.

What’s your favorite snack food? Chips and cheese/guac/salsa. I also love popcorn.

You’re watching Law & Order, is it the regular or SVU? On the rare occasion I’d sit down to watch it, SVU.

What were you doing last time it snowed? Existing? I wasn’t doing one particular thing as that’s a common occurrence in the winter where I live. So I was just going about my day as usual.

Do you have to sleep with a fan on? Yep.

Chapstick or lip gloss? Chapstick.

When was the last time you took a shower? Last night.

Do you know how to play basketball? I know the basic rules. Am I good at it? Nope.

Name one thing you put on a salad: Croutons.

Do you own anything that’s your favorite color? Lots.

What’s the last thing you ordered from a Mexican restaurant? Tacos and chips and guac.

Do you carry a purse or a backpack? Yeah.

What kind of soda is your favorite? Root beer.

Have you ever cut yourself shaving? Many times!

Penguins or pandas? Pandas.