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#let me say all these things on my little blog in the corner of the internet
gonersgoners · 7 months
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remember when i said over a year ago that vegapunk's arc would start revealing even more of sanji's power and potential and how hard that was worrying me? yeah
#i'm clearly talking to myself here since this blog is basically a corner of my brain#but last chapter having sanji deflect a light beam and both kizaru and franky reacting the way they did#and zoro commenting in wano you cannot possibly block a laser... lmao....lmao!#ooooh man i just. feel oda is cooking something for sanji. and since there was a parallel with the wings of the pirate king#in recent chapters (where oda typically shows both sanji and zoro fighting and not just one of them)#just... man. man! man. lol#i know i can't let myself go and talk about all things going through my mind anymore because of. lol guilt and fear of being annoying#but god. that moment stirred something in me. like you're resurrecting a fucking corpse#so i am both scared and excited about next chapters and what this means for sanji#i was saying from DAY ONE of this arc being centered about vegapunk that it would eventually#touch on sanji and this is it. this is happening#if this for some reason isn't it. and oda will for some reason just let this slide or die in the shadows? i won't understand it#because of JUDGE and VEGAPUNK and QUEEN being partners and being linked to vegapunk! like come on. the connection is there#and this laser deflecting thing seems to finally touch on this red thread i've been holding with both my fingers like an insane person#so yeah. lol. listening to a video right now about it and finally. FINALLY i see SOMEONE ELSE point out that#not mentioning judge still is giga weird. so here's hoping. here's hoping#also lol it was very fun to be on reddit and look at so many people being MAD that sanji managed to do that. and that we got a little bit o#mr prince vibes. LMAO STAY MAD. my boy is being treated good right now and i can't wait for oda to destroy me#(again) lol#GG rambles
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waywardmillennial · 2 years
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Heyyy I have so many thoughts and feelings about Steven and his shows/content right now and I would love to hear alllllll your Steven thoughts! (if you want to share obvs)
I hope you are doing okay and I am sending you so many virtual hugs right now! <333
oh my beloved Noa *hugs back* 💜 I appreciate this question and I also look forward to hearing all of your thoughts too. I just got done drying all my tears from the final Worth It trailer and I have a jumbled stream of consciousness to share - and it got a bit longer than I anticipated so settle in.
First, the ending of Worth It is a bit of a surprise, but I also understand and accept it. They really do know how to dig the emotional knife in by ending the trailer like this though T_T
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Same, Steven. Same.
Interesting to note (as I write this) Steven hasn't shared the final trailer on his socials. The last that he said about WI was his comment about feeling overwhelmed on March 2nd. Makes me want to send him a virtual hug.
It was so weird how the timing of this announcement came at the same time as the Mystery Files news on Watcher - so I've felt like I've been sad while most of the fandom is celebrating. I hoped after announcing Survival Mode that the next show might include Steven, and that's not the case (and the Worth It news felt like an extra gut punch on top of this). I know we had both talked about trying to focus more on Steven in 2023 (to try to get him on the trending celebs by the end of the year) and now it's looking like that might be a bigger challenge. I jokingly said in one of my discords that Watcher is becoming the Ryan and Shane network, but it's sort of true? And as someone who is a huge fan of Ryan and Shane, and their dynamic, I am happy. But I can also be sad about the lack of Steven content. I contain multitudes.
I wish that Watcher would focus on a show that really highlights and includes all three of them (not just WW+ on patreon). Maybe that's too difficult to coordinate with all of their schedules? But it would be nice. I have seen some great ideas floating around the internet, like a travel style show where all three of them explore a city. Steven could show the boys local food, Ryan could be entertainment or local history, and Shane could find an off-beat tourist spot for them to explore. I don't know - just a thought. They all seem competitive in different ways, so maybe a game show style would be fun too.
I would also love to see a Steven and Ryan show, or a Steven and Shane show. I think there is some untapped chaotic energy in either of those pairings.
Okay, this might sound bad at first - but let me finish before you yell at me: It kinda seems like Steven is the third wheel of Watcher - BECAUSE - Ryan and Shane were making their content together and came over as a package deal, and Steven didn't have that built-in report with either of them from the 'feed. This isn't really Steven's fault. However, Watcher continuing to lean into the Ghoul Boys pairing so hard isn't helping to bridge that gap. I feel like they could do more to mix it up (also, like only Ryan and Shane going on the GMM and Smosh collabs was a little sad to me. I'm always gonna be "but what about Steven Lim" basically as often as I can).
NOTE: I do not think this makes Steven less important than either Ryan or Shane. Watcher would not be here without Steven and his business sense behind the camera, and I love all of the shows he has put on Watcher! Steven is an integral part of this channel and it would not be the same without him.
That's why his last season of Dish Granted worries me a little bit. That has always been one of my top three shows on Watcher, and I'm glad Steven has a solo show like that. But in the latest season he took such a big step back from cooking for a lot of the episodes, it felt like he's trying to phase himself out. Maybe I'm misinterpreting it, when really they're just trying to get the audience used to other faces before they premiere their own shows -- but when you pair this with the lack of new Steven shows, and him being so quiet about Worth It ending, it makes me a little anxious. Side note: I woke up with the intense desire to make a playlist of all the Watcher One-Offs and collabs they've done, and found a Steven Lim collab I hadn't seen before. I don't even think Steven ever promo'd it on his insta? He is sort of a private guy, when compared to the other Watcher founders -- remember how this fandom wasn't exactly sure when Steven's bday was? lol -- so maybe he's just a quiet little guy, and doesn't mind taking a backseat for a while.
All that to say, I know Steven is a grown man and he doesn't need me to worry about him. I get it, but I'm just an anxious person by default. Steven's content is always so relaxing and wholesome and a good time, that it's a bit scary to think of not having it as much anymore. Plus, I think that he's such a creative, thoughtful, and funny person who deserves to be seen by lots of people and feel appreciated for what he contributes to the channel (I was so excited when his Steven Eats Through Korea for 24 Hours Straight video jumped to one million views faster than most new Watcher shows do, and is still sitting at more views than the last season of PH). I hope that he sees that, and I'm sure he does because he strikes me as the founder who looks at their numbers more than the others.
I will always be here, yelling about Steven Lim's achievements, and hyping him up as much as I can. And I hope that we'll see more of him on Watcher soon!
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kisskuni · 3 months
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pet names
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↳ pet names that the demon brothers like to call you by. [all brothers x gn!reader]
tags: just fluff! + pet names lol. ‘doll’ is used once, i wouldn’t consider it feminine but take it as you will. otherwise gn :)
notes: first fic on this blog heheh. reblogs are super appreciated, please and thank you <3
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lucifer ━━━
a gloved hand runs through black hair, the eldest brother glaring at the paperwork covering his desk. you wonder for a brief moment if he thinks the look he’s giving it will force it away.
“stressed?” you ask him, a teasing tone to your voice.
he hums in discontent. “something like that.”
you straighten from your spot leaned against the door frame and walk over to him. your hands come up to his shoulders and rub at the muscles there, hoping to bring him some sore of relief.
“need any help?” you ask.
“i’m alright, darling, but thank you.” though still clearly stressed, he offers you a small smile.
mammon ━━━
“you will not believe what i just got!”
mammon walks into your room previously unannounced, dorky smile painting his face. he holds up two slips of paper, waving them in front of your face. it takes you a moment to read the writing.
“ooh, are those tickets? for that movie i wanted to see?”
he beams at your excitement. “i’m the best.”
“yeah, you are,” you smile and reach for the tickets in his hands. “thank you so much.”
“anything for you, doll.”
leviathan ━━━
“hey, can you—“ levi speaks to you, but frowns at his game. “no, i can’t heal you. there are two other characters who can.”
you watch him curiously, watch as he rolls his eyes at the person he’s playing with. “what’s up?”
he takes one side of his headset off. “i’m sorry. can you grab me my water? it’s on my nightstand.”
“oh, sure.” you reach over from where you’re tucked comfortably into his bedsheets and grab the water bottle on his nightstand. “here.”
he turns around him his chair to grab the water bottle you toss at him. he catches it easily and smiles at you. “thank you, honey.”
satan ━━━
“are you comfy?”
you sit upright with a small yelp. you look around, gathering your thoughts back. what was supposed to be a quick lie-down on the couch in satan’s room turned into a nap, apparently.
“i- uhm. yeah.” you answer quickly. one hand comes up to rub the sleep from your eyes.
“you can rest if you’re tired, my love. i have some reading i wanted to catch up on anyway.” satan says, moving to sit beside you.
you take a deep breath and ponder the offer for a moment. instead of responding, you simply lay back down and use his lap as a pillow. he’ll get the idea eventually.
asmodeus ━━━
the squeal asmo let out was beyond exstatic. he clasped his hands together, smiling ear to ear.
“ah, i’m so excited.” he said, running off to some corner of his room.
“is it really that exciting?”
asmo frowns at you rather dramatically. he feigns a look of offense and continues to his closet, you following a few steps behind.
“oh, i love how this would look on you, cutie.”
you smile fondly at the nickname and continue to watch as he picks out various clothes for you to try on.
beelzebub ━━━
“y’know… doesn’t matter how strong i am, you’re a demon and i really don’t think i’m capable of spotting you at the gym.” you say.
you know he likes to work out, but him lifting weights worried you sometimes.
“it’s alright. i promise i’ll be fine, sweetheart.”
you glare at him. you know he will be, but a little voice in the back of your head won’t let you stop worrying about him. you suppose its a good thing.
belphegor ━━━
“good morning,” you tease, nodding toward the alarm clock that read 4:38 PM. “nice of you to rise so early.”
he grumbles at you, wiping sleep from his eye. he takes one of the pillows he’s been snuggled up with and tosses it at you, playful smile making its way onto his face.
you bat the pillow away, smiling back at him.
“you are so mean.” you claim, though still smiling.
“mhm. whatever you say, lovely.”
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callieisto · 5 months
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Jason Todd fucks you like he’s scared you’re gonna break.
MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DO NOT INTERACT. I WILL BLOCK YOU. NSFW BELOW THE CUT
Jason holds you so so soft. He kisses you like he’s worried that you’ll suddenly decide you hate him. His big hands cupping your face, angling you just right…
“Hi, sweet thing.” He murmured, smiling as he pulled away, admiring the dazed look on your face as he presses you up against the wall. “Oh, my darlin’s getting all dumb for me? Already?”
He’s only kind of an asshole when he finally gets you undressed- kissing your stomach, your thighs, the inside of your wrist, emerald green eyes half-lidded and peering up at you as he does. Worshiping you the way you deserve to be worshipped.
when he finally gets inside you, he’s all up in your ear moaning and nipping at any exposed skin he can get. One hand on your hip, the other laced with yours as he kisses over your face.
“so good, ‘s so good.” He moans, kissing you sweetly. You’re drooling and he laughs, swiping it away with his thumb all gentle. “You can hang on for me just a little longer, right?” He coos, kissing the corner of your mouth.
you’ve already cum once- he just wants to wring another one out of you. Making you feel good is what he’s the best at- it makes him feel good to see the aftermath, the way your bones turn to jelly and he gets to take care of you.
“One more.” He whines, pouting down at you as he works your body the way you like. “Please, please, sweet thing? Jus’ one more, and then I’ll be done, I promise, just…”
And you do, because you’re so good to him. Better than he deserves.
He cums soon after, kissing you deep, filling you up. He stays there for a minute, peppering you with gentle kisses, laughing softly as you groan at the fluids cooling on your body when you come down from your high.
“oh, you did so good.” He coos. “So good, sweet thing. Let me get you a snack, baby. Let me clean you up.”
and when he’s done, he slips you into one of his oversized hoodies he knows you like, and he holds you gentle as the two of you fall back into a bed he freshly made while you were getting out of the bath.
you fall asleep to his steady breaths, the feeling of his lips on your face, and the rumble of his voice saying “I love you, baby.”
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back2bluesidex · 6 months
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Darling, can I be your favorite? - JJK (18+)
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Pairing: Jungkook X Fem!Reader
Theme: PWP, SMUT, Infidelity au
Wordcount: 1.4k+
Summary: Your close friend bagged a hot boyfriend. And that said boyfriend is more interested in you than her.
Warnings: Infidelity, Jungkook cheats on his girlfriend with the reader, mild flirting, make out, protected sex, oral (f. receiving), morally wrong. NSFW!!
Minors are not allowed in this blog!!
A/N: been long since I have written an unhinged smut.
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This is the third time you are meeting Jungkook. 
First time was when Nayeon introduced him as they started dating officially. 
You and Nayeon have known each other since you were in diapers. You can’t call her your best friend but she has been there for as long as you can remember. Even though you haven’t shared all of your miseries with her (she hasn’t either), you two have understood that the other one is having a tough time and have been there silently. 
So, it’s not wrong to say that you know her and how good of a human being she is. You guys are alike in more ways than you would like to admit. 
But when she introduced Jungkook as ‘the person she is seeing’, you were shocked to say the least. 
You don’t wanna be a bitch about it but Jungkook deserves better than her. He is everything a woman would want in a man. 
Jeon Jungkook is handsome, has a stable job as a graphics designer, has tattoos and piercings and is incredibly panty-dropping hot. He is respectful, sweet and doesn’t talk loudly. In other words, he is your ideal type of man. 
So, even when you were happy for your friend, you were a little bit jealous too. 
The second time was on Nayeon’s birthday.
She bragged about him all night to whoever decided to show up. You enjoyed the scene staying afar. 
The similarities between these two meets? Well, both of the times things were awkward. 
Especially because yours and Jungkook’s eyes met a lot more times than is socially acceptable. While you have hardly exchanged any words, you just knew things are going to be tense if you ever get to meet one-on-one. 
And that’s what is happening currently. 
“I- uh, hi.” you mutter awkwardly standing at the doorway of your friend’s home. 
“Hi, Y/N” your name rolls out of Jungkook’s tongue, sounding better than ever. The corner of his lips turn upwards into a charming smile and you suddenly feel jealous of Nayeon’s luck, yet again. 
“Is Nayeon home?” You try to take a look inside her apartment. In the meantime you feel Jungkook’s eyes boring into your skull and slowly dipping down, racking your figure.   
You want nothing more than to just hand the kimchi to your friend and run home. 
“No. She got called at work for some emergency. It’s just me.” Jungkook’s voice dips down a little and when you look at him, his eyes are full of mirth. 
“Oh. alright. I was actually visiting my mom and she packed some kimchi for Nayeon. Here.” you extend your hand for him to take the box. 
As he holds the small handle, his fingers overlap yours. You had to gulp once to resist the improper expression that was about to take over your face. 
“Thanks.” Jungkook whispers. 
“Not a big deal. I will take my leave now.” You turn your heels to leave the place only to be stopped by him. 
Jungkook’s hand wraps around your wrist a little too protectively, “why don’t you come in? Nayeon will be back in an hour or so.” 
His doe eyes turn bigger, as if he is pleading you to stay. 
Contemplating for a moment (and liking the way his hand feels on your skin), you voice, “should I?” 
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“You know this place better than me.” Jungkook lets his remark sit in the tense air of the apartment. You chuckle at it while transferring the kimchi to Nayeon’s containers. 
“Yeah. I have been here for uncountable times already.” You add lightheartedly. Jungkook’s eyes stay focused on your figure as you work inside your friend’s kitchen so domestically.  
“But now that you have moved in, I will visit less. Don’t worry.” You speak again, finding him way too quiet. 
“What? No. I didn’t move in.” he chuckles, “We were just hanging out since it's the weekend but she got called.” 
“Oh. That’s bad.” 
“But I’m glad. Glad that you came.” again. Again that mischievous raspy voice that sends sparks through your body. 
You look up at Jungkook, finding him staring at you with a serious and somewhat dark expression. Not knowing what to do, you smile at him. 
“So.. are you seeing anyone currently?” He speaks with the same raspy voice. 
“Uh- no. not at this moment.” You reply, keeping the box of kimchi in the refrigerator. 
“That’s such a waste.” he says, taking tentative steps towards you. Eyes focusing on yours. 
“Waste? Of what?” you try to sound normal but your heart starts beating fast when Jungkook reaches close to you, gradually backing you up against the fridge. 
“Of this beautiful face. This- ” his eyes drop on your chest, “alluring body of yours.” 
“Jungkook-” 
“Honestly, I couldn’t take my eyes off you since the first day we met. I know it’s not morally right but I am a man after all. I DMed you on insta but you haven’t responded yet.” 
“Oh, I- I didn’t notice.” what the fuck! He dmmed you on insta??
“I was about to ghost your friend right after she introduced me to her friends but I stayed… because of you.” Jungkook’s mouth hovers right above your ear. His chest, now, touching yours. 
You lose your mind. All the sense of morals and rationals leave through the window of wants and needs. 
Your throat gets dry but you talk anyway, “why is that?” 
“Because I want you to be my favorite.” and then his lips are crashing into yours. You dive down into the feeling forgetting that you are making out with your friend’s boyfriend. 
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“Fuck! How do you taste so good?” Jungkook moans into your cunt as he laps up every drop of arousal. 
“Jungko-” You groan in pleasure, finding it hard to keep your eyes open anymore. Your orgasm is only one step away. 
Jungkook presses the fat of his tongue on your clit as he forks two of his fingers inside your hole. Pressing down on one particular spot, he reaps out your orgasm from you. 
You let out a scream. 
“Shhh, baby. Do you want the neighbors to hear us even when the owner of the house is absent?” he teases you. 
But you are too gone to react to that.  
Jungkook sits on his knees on the bed, unbuckles his belt, pulls down his jeans and boxers at once and reveals his rock hard length. 
He pumps it twice using the lubrication of his spit before reaching for his discarded pants and fishing out a condom from it. 
When he is done with wrapping up his cock, he positions it on your already fucked out hole. 
“Can I enter?” he asks politely. 
Even though you know you will be overstimulated, you are greedy to have your friend’s hot boyfriend inside of you. So you nod a yes. 
And with that Jungkook enters you. 
He slides in smoothly at once. Giving you a little time to adjust, he starts moving. 
At first his pace is careful and mediocre but then it starts increasing bit by bit. One of Jungkook’s hands reaches for your throat, holding you there, not quite choking just yet. 
His other hand is busy playing with your clit to distract you from the inhumane pace he has adopted already. 
The bed starts creaking violently. Your moans know no bounds. Jungkook ain’t doing better as well. He keeps grunting and sprewling dirty shits in your ear. 
“I knew you would be a dirty slut the moment my eyes landed on you.” He says between the harsh thrusts. 
“Oh-fuc-junkoo-”
“Look at you, going dumb over your friend’s boyfriend’s dick, huh? Such a dirty cocksleeve!” his derogatory words bring out the best possible orgasm you have ever had. And you cum on his cock. 
“F-fuck! You cummed so much, you whore.” Jungkook groans cumming inside the condom himself. 
When you are done coming down from your high, shame comes crawling inside your mind. 
You just slept with your childhood friend’s boyfriend. You should just go and jump off a bridge or something. 
“This… This was completely wrong. We should have not. I - I am just fucking terrible.” You grab your hair out of shame lying naked in your friend’s bed. 
“Don’t worry. I was about to end things with her anyway.” He speaks casually, as if it’s no big deal to commit infidelity. 
Tossing the condom in the trash can (like he wants Nayeon to find out what he did) he says, “Shall we continue? Your place or mine?” 
You know you have fucked up a big time. 
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Taglist:
@phenomenalgirl9 @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @chimchimmarie @coffeedepressionsoup @meowstake @vonvi-blog @nochuel @chimmisbae @i-have-no-life-charlie
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ivysangel · 6 months
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surprise post bc my blogs fixed woo hoo!! i initially sent this as an ask to @hanasnx as my contribution to his baby daddy!jason au, but i also wanted to share it here for u guys as a little treat :p
Baby Daddy!Jason, who you co-parent with, in a very civilized way. No joke, the picture of camaraderie between exes. He takes your daughter on the days he's supposed to (which isn't that often, given his occupation) and brings her back on time, always with a little gift for you as well. Flowers, chocolates, a little knick-knack reminiscent of when you were together. It's not because he's in love with you or anything; it's just the principle of the matter. "Happy wife, happy life," not that you were married or even dating, but he figures the mother of his child should get love sometimes.
Baby Daddy!Jason, who, the next time he sees you, it's to drop off something your daughter forgot with him, and as he's handing you the bag, he casually asks why you haven't been asking him to take her more often. You had been for a while when you were going on dates weekly, but for some reason, the relationships never went anywhere, so you just gave up. "Oh, you know, it just wasn't working out." you say off-handedly, "Kept getting ghosted." you sound only marginally disappointed, moreso annoyed. "What a shame, they're really missing out," he says, getting real close to you and taking up your entire field of vision.
Baby Daddy!Jason, who's got your entire calendar memorized and knows that his daughter's not home tonight and that you've got no plans other than watching movies in solitude. He knows you're too stubborn to call him over for company even though you've been giving him fuck me eyes in passing for the past few months, so he figures he just has to take matters into his own hands and corner you until you give in like he knows you want to.
Baby Daddy!Jason, who fucks you on damn near every surface in the house, telling you he's just christening the place like he would've already done if you lived together. Whispers apologies in your ears about scaring off all of your dates while he's splitting you open, bullying his cock into you while your eyes roll to the back of your head because you haven't been fucked this good in years, not since the last time you'd been with him. You're face is deep in some pillows when you realize the memories you had of his dick pale in comparison to the real thing, and you aren't sure you could go back to using your imagination to get off after tonight.
Baby Daddy!Jason, who keeps you up all night until your pussy's red and puffy from how many times it'd come in contact with his hips while he was fucking you. Fat tip kissing your cervix until you were clawing at his biceps, begging him to give you some reprieve, tears in your eyes while you babbled incoherently, too lost in the feeling of him to make any sense. He admits in the midst of sex that he tried to get over you; he really did, but he just couldn't; he just couldn't picture you with another man in any capacity. The thought of someone else touching you, fucking you, loving you, made his stomach turn, filling him with rage and an overwhelming need to claim you as his.
Baby Daddy!Jason, who's a level-headed, non-fragile ego'd man until it comes to his family, which, contrary to what some would say, did not only consist of his daughter but you too, and any guy who tried to get with you was a threat. he didn't know the intentions of other men, but he knew his own, which was to keep his little family happy as long as he was alive. If that meant putting a gun to the head of anyone who made a move on you and consoling you by stretching you out the way he knew you liked until you just said "fuck it" and let him put another baby in you, then so be it.
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novaursa · 1 month
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Where Banners Fall
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- Summary: After your fall at Rook’s Rest, Gwayne takes you to safety and some hidden things come to light.
- Paring: targ!reader/Gwayne Hightower
- Note: reader is referred to as Y/N, is Rhaenyra's sister and bonded with Silverwing. This part continues just after The Flames We Carry. For all parts done in chronological order visit my blog, the list is pinned to the top.
-Rating: Mild 13+
- Word count: 3 320
- A/N: Yeah, this one was not ment to come out today either, but you all liked the last part very much, so, here is the continuation of it. Enjoy! ❤️
- Tag(s): @deniixlovezelda @duck-duck-goose2 @aadu2173 @sachaa-ff
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The moon casts its pale light through the dense trees, illuminating the night in a silvery glow. The wind is cold, biting through layers of bloodied cloth, as Gwayne Hightower clutches the reins with one hand and his side with the other. His breath comes ragged, each inhalation a struggle as the gash Cole delivered sends jolts of fire down his side. But none of it matters, not when your life is in his hands. 
You lie slumped against his chest, your skin far too pale, and your breaths shallow, rattling with a sound that tears at his heart. Blood streaks your face, staining your lips, a crimson trail leaking from your nose. The fall from Silverwing... gods, he can still hear the roar of dragons and the sickening crunch of bones as you hit the ground. He couldn't—wouldn’t—leave you there, even if it meant betraying everything he'd ever known.
He halts the horse in the shadow of a large oak tree and dismounts with a groan, one arm wrapped protectively around his wounded side. The pain lances through him, nearly buckling his legs, but he grits his teeth and turns to you, his gaze softening despite the turmoil raging within.
"Y/N," he whispers, barely able to speak your name without his voice cracking. Carefully, he lifts you from the saddle, feeling your weight crumple against him, your head lolling against his shoulder. His fingers tremble as he lays you down gently on the mossy ground. You are so still, too still. 
He kneels beside you, brushing damp strands of hair from your face. "Open your eyes. Just... look at me, Y/N." His voice is hoarse, almost pleading. His hands, stained with blood—your blood, his blood—ghost over your cheeks, checking for any signs of life. 
Your eyelids flutter, and a soft moan escapes your lips, causing his heart to lurch with both relief and anguish. "Gwayne?" you murmur, your voice barely more than a whisper. Each word seems to sap what little strength you have left.
"I'm here. I won’t leave you, I promise," he assures you, his voice steady though it takes everything in him to keep it that way. He cups your face in his hand, thumb tracing the curve of your jaw. "You're safe now."
Tears prick his eyes as he sees the pain etched across your features. It’s a stark reminder that you’re not just his princess, the sister of Rhaenyra, daughter of Viserys—you’re the woman who’s owned his heart for years, even if it was a tragic love and often denied.
"You shouldn’t have come back for me," you rasp, your breath hitching in pain. "They’ll kill you…"
"Let them," Gwayne says with a fierce intensity, voice raw with emotion. "If it meant keeping you alive, I’d suffer any fate they decide." He swallows, lowering his head so his forehead rests against yours. "But I couldn’t let you die back there. Not you."
Your eyes fill with tears, but your smile is faint and tinged with regret. "Foolish knight. Always so stubborn."
He chuckles softly, though the sound is strained. "Perhaps. Or perhaps I’ve finally done something right, if it means keeping you with me just a little longer."
You cough weakly, and the sound sends a fresh surge of panic through him. Blood dribbles from the corner of your mouth, and his heart twists at the sight. Desperation claws at him, urging him to do something, anything to ease your suffering, but he knows there’s little he can do out here in the wilderness with no healer, no herbs, nothing but his own two hands.
"I need to make camp," he says gently, brushing his thumb across your cheek one last time before he stands. "We’ll rest here. I’ll tend to you as best I can."
You try to protest, your voice faint. "You’re injured too… I can see the blood. You’ll bleed out if you—"
"Shh." His tone is soft but firm, silencing your concern. "You’re more important to me than any wound I bear." 
He gathers what little strength he has left and begins preparing a makeshift camp, struggling to keep his movements swift despite the burning pain in his side. He lights a small fire, the flickering flames casting shadows over your pale features. Every time he glances at you, his chest tightens with fear that he’ll lose you before the dawn.
Finally, when he’s done, he returns to your side, wrapping his cloak around your trembling form. He cradles you gently in his lap, pressing you close to share what warmth he can offer.
You turn your head weakly to look at him, tears brimming in your eyes. "Gwayne… if I don’t—"
"No," he interrupts, his voice sharp, as if the very idea of you leaving him is unbearable. "You’ll live, Y/N. We’ve both been through too much for it to end here."
There’s a long silence, broken only by the crackling of the fire and the distant sound of night creatures. You rest your head against his chest, finding comfort in the steady thrum of his heartbeat beneath the layers of armor and cloth. Despite everything, the world seems a little less terrifying with him holding you like this.
"Thank you," you murmur softly, your fingers curling weakly against his tunic. "For saving me… for staying."
"Always," he whispers, tightening his hold on you, as if afraid you’ll slip away. "For you, I would defy the world."
His words are heavy with truth. He betrayed Cole, risked everything—his loyalty, his honor, his House—because nothing mattered more than you. As he watches your eyelids grow heavy with exhaustion, he swears to himself that he’ll see you through this, no matter the cost.
The night wears on, and as the fire crackles and the stars glimmer overhead, he keeps vigil, his thoughts solely on you. In the stillness of the night, there is only the two of you, bound by fate, by the shared loss and love that lingers unspoken between every touch, every look.
And as sleep finally claims you, Gwayne brushes a tender kiss to your brow, whispering the words he’s held back for far too long.
"I love you, Y/N."
The admission hangs in the air, soft and fragile like a promise yet to be fulfilled. But as the night deepens, with you in his arms and the world beyond fading into the distance, it is a vow he clings to with all his heart.
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The first rays of dawn filter through the dense canopy of trees, casting dappled patterns of golden light over your face. The chill of the night still lingers in the air, but warmth gradually spreads as the sun climbs higher. Gwayne Hightower stirs awake, the dull ache in his side reminding him of the wound that still bleeds sluggishly beneath layers of makeshift bandages. But the pain is forgotten the moment he notices your chest rise and fall in steady rhythm. You’re alive. You’re breathing.
For a fleeting moment, all his worries and fears dissolve as he watches you. Your skin is still too pale, your breathing shallow, but your lips are no longer tinged with the blue pallor of death. When your eyes flutter open, hazy and unfocused at first, he releases a breath he didn’t realize he was holding.
“Gwayne?” Your voice is soft, laced with confusion and pain, but it’s enough to make his heart soar.
“I’m here.” He shifts closer, gently brushing his hand over your forehead, smoothing away a few stray strands of hair. His touch is tender, reassuring, but there’s an edge of desperation to it, as if touching you is the only way he can convince himself you’re still with him. “You’re safe.”
You close your eyes briefly, a tear slipping down your cheek as you whisper, “Silverwing… she’s gone, isn’t she?”
Gwayne’s throat tightens, and he struggles to find the words. He knows how deep the bond is between a rider and their dragon, knows how it must feel like losing a piece of your soul. “She saved you, Y/N. She fought until the very end to protect you.”
A sob escapes your lips, but it’s weak, more of a trembling breath than anything. You turn your face into his chest, seeking solace in his embrace. “She was everything to me. I felt her… I felt her fear when they descended on us. She tried, Gwayne… she tried so hard.”
He wraps his arms around you, holding you close as you grieve. “I know,” he murmurs, his voice thick with emotion. “She was brave, just like you.”
For a long moment, he just holds you, letting the silence settle between you, broken only by the faint sounds of the waking forest. His thoughts, however, race. He knows they can’t stay here. His nephews’ banners surround them from every side, and it’s only a matter of time before scouts or patrols find them. He can’t risk it, not with you in this condition.
“We need to get you to Dragonstone,” he finally says, his voice low but determined. “To Rhaenyra. She’ll know how to keep you safe.”
You nod faintly against his chest, but your eyes are distant, as if lost in some faraway memory. “Dragonstone… where our son is.”
The words come so softly that at first, Gwayne thinks he’s misheard. His heart stutters, the blood draining from his face as he pulls back slightly to look at you. “What did you say?”
You blink slowly, your eyes glazed with exhaustion and pain, but there’s a haunted look in them now. “Our son… I can’t… I can’t lose him too.”
The world tilts beneath Gwayne’s feet. He stares at you, trying to make sense of what you’ve just said. “Y/N… what do you mean, our son?”
You swallow, the effort seeming to drain you. “He’s ours, Gwayne. He… he was born after… after everything. After Daemon took me.”
His chest tightens, shock mingling with something deeper, more painful. He had always known you were taken by Daemon, given to him as part of the political machinations he could never fully understand years ago. It was a decision that had shattered him at the time, but hearing this now—knowing you bore his child in secret—rips at old wounds, laying them bare.
“A son…” The words are a whisper, disbelief and awe warring in his voice. “You kept him hidden from me?”
Tears brim in your eyes again, your voice breaking. “I had no choice. Daemon… he knew the child wasn’t his. He claimed him, raised him as his own, but he’s ours, Gwayne. He’s our flesh and blood.”
Gwayne’s heart pounds in his chest, a maelstrom of emotions swirling within him—anger, sorrow, guilt, and an overwhelming sense of loss. “All this time… I never knew.”
“I wanted to tell you, but it was too dangerous,” you confess, your voice trembling. “I thought… I thought it was better if you didn’t know. To keep you safe from Daemon’s wrath.”
Gwayne’s world narrows to this moment, to the truth of a child he never knew he had, one who’s been raised by a man who has always been his rival in more ways than one. The thought of Daemon laying claim to something so precious to him—it ignites a rage deep in his chest, but it’s tempered by the sheer anguish on your face.
He tightens his grip on you, pulling you into him as if holding you closer will somehow mend the broken pieces of the life you might have had together. “We’ll get him back,” he vows, voice low and fierce. “You and I—we’ll go to Dragonstone. To your sister. To our son. I won’t let Daemon keep what’s ours.” 
The thought makes his blood run cold, but for you, he’d face even that man.
You look up at him, your gaze searching his, and for a moment, you’re not the princess caught in the bloody web of war and dragons—you’re just a woman looking at the man you love, hoping against hope that he can keep the promise he’s just made. “I’ve missed him so much,” you whisper. “And I’ve missed you.”
Gwayne’s breath hitches, and for the first time in what feels like an eternity, he allows himself to hold you as if you’re the only thing that matters. “I’m here now,” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to your temple, his lips lingering there. “And I’m not going anywhere without you. We’ll get through this.”
The resolve in his words steadies the both of you. There’s a long road ahead, fraught with dangers and uncertainties, but he knows with unwavering certainty that he won’t let anything tear you away from him again—not the war, not his family’s betrayal, and not even Daemon’s machinations.
You’ve lost so much—your dragon, your freedom, your soul—but in this moment, you find a glimmer of hope in the man who’s risked everything for you. And as the morning sun rises, casting light on the uncertain path ahead, you cling to that hope, knowing that Gwayne will do whatever it takes to bring you home—to your sister, to your son, and to the life you both deserve.
Together, you’ll reclaim what’s been taken. And together, you’ll face whatever comes next.
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The rhythmic pounding of hooves on uneven ground fills the tense silence between you and Gwayne as he guides the horse deeper into the wilderness. Morning light filters through the trees in shifting patterns, but it does little to ease the weight pressing on Gwayne’s chest. His mind churns, cycling through the revelation you just laid bare—a son. His son. Every heartbeat seems to echo with the implications, each thump a reminder of the child who was taken from him, raised by a man Gwayne both loathes and fears.
He clenches the reins tighter, trying to steady his thoughts as they race uncontrollably. A son. His thoughts circle back to it, gnawing at him like an itch he can’t scratch. What is the boy like? What does he look like? The questions burn in his throat, but the uncertainty of what comes next gnaws at him even more. Daemon, he thinks bitterly, the name sour on his tongue. The prince’s shadow looms over everything now, twisting this newfound truth into something almost unbearable.
But he can’t afford to let his emotions take control. Not now. You’re still weak, clinging to consciousness by a thread. The ride is perilous, the terrain rough, and every jolt of the horse draws a faint whimper from your lips. Each sound slices through him like a blade, a reminder that you’re slipping further away with every mile. His instinct is to press forward, to ride hard and fast to the nearest settlement that might offer help, but every harsh movement risks worsening your condition.
He takes a deep breath and glances down at you, leaning back against his chest, your eyes half-lidded in a haze of pain. "Y/N," he calls gently, hoping to draw you back to him, even if only for a few moments. "Stay with me. I need you to stay with me."
You stir slightly, your eyelids fluttering as you try to focus. Your breaths are labored, each one a struggle, but the sound of his voice seems to anchor you in the present.
"I’m here," you whisper, though your voice is faint and distant, almost as if you’re speaking from another world. "Just… so tired."
Gwayne swallows the lump in his throat, trying to push through the fear gnawing at him. He needs answers, needs to understand what you’ve been through, what he’s been through, if he’s going to piece together a plan that might save you both. "You spoke of our son… before," he says carefully, his voice low, as if afraid to disturb the fragile balance of reality. "Tell me about him, Y/N. I need to know."
Your gaze drifts upward, unfocused, as if you’re looking at something beyond his reach. A faint smile tugs at your lips, though it’s tinged with sadness. "He’s beautiful," you murmur, voice trembling with emotion. "He has your eyes… that same spark. But he’s stubborn, too. So stubborn, just like his father."
Gwayne’s heart clenches at the thought. He can almost see it—an image of a child with your grace and his determination, laughing with that carefree joy only children possess. But there’s a shadow over the image, a darkness that steals the warmth from it.
"He doesn’t know who I am, does he?" Gwayne asks, though he already suspects the answer.
You shake your head weakly, eyes glistening with unshed tears. "He thinks… he thinks Daemon is his father. That’s all he’s known." Your voice wavers, cracking under the weight of the truth. "It was the only way to keep him safe. The only way to protect him while the world tore itself apart."
Gwayne’s jaw tightens, a surge of anger rushing through him, not at you but at the situation, at the cruelty of a world that forced such a choice upon you. "Daemon," he says bitterly, the name dripping with resentment. "He took everything from me. He even took him—our son—and you."
You turn your head slightly, struggling to focus on him, your expression full of regret. "He did it to protect him, Gwayne. As much as I hate it, I can’t deny that. In a world like this, with war tearing us all apart, who else could raise him? Who else could keep him alive?"
Gwayne’s throat tightens, the fury and sorrow tangling together in a knot that’s hard to unravel. He wants to argue, to curse Daemon’s name, but deep down, a small part of him knows you’re right. That’s what stings the most. Daemon was the one with power, the one who could shield the child from the dangers that lurked on all sides, even if it meant poisoning the boy’s mind against the truth of who he really is.
But he’s not ready to accept it. Not yet. Not when there’s still a chance to change things, to reclaim what’s his.
"I’ll find a way," he vows, more to himself than to you. "I’ll get him back, Y/N. I’ll make sure he knows who his true father is."
You smile weakly, though your eyes are growing heavier, the strain of staying conscious taking its toll. "You always were driven, my love," you murmur, voice fading. "Just… don’t lose yourself in anger. Our son deserves better than that."
Before he can respond, your eyes close again, and your body goes limp against him. Panic seizes him for a moment, but he quickly checks your pulse, relieved to feel the faint but steady beat beneath your skin. You’re slipping back into delirium, but you’re still alive. That’s all that matters now.
He looks ahead, squinting at the road as he spots the faint outlines of a small village in the distance—a neutral settlement, one of the few places where banners don’t fly for either side. It’s a place to rest, to gather supplies, and perhaps even to find someone who can tend to your wounds. But it’s not without risk. Enemies could be lurking anywhere, and he knows he can’t let his guard down.
As he rides toward the village, Gwayne’s thoughts swirl with plans and possibilities. He needs to get you to Dragonstone, needs to confront the truths that have been hidden for so long. But more than that, he needs to find a way to reunite with the son he never knew, the son who now lies in Daemon’s grasp.
And as the horse plods steadily forward, the determination in his heart hardens into something unbreakable. He will see this through, no matter what it costs. Because even in the face of betrayal, war, and loss, there’s something worth fighting for—a future that’s still within reach.
And he won’t let anyone—not even Daemon—take that from him.
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the-tarot-witch22 · 3 months
Text
Your first night with your future spouse 18+ - Pick a pile
Note : *Intense se*ual messages for you guys, so Minors DNI*
Pile 1/ Pile 2/ Pile 3
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Hello everyone ! This is my another pick a pile or pac reading so please be kind and leave comment or reblog, and let me know if it resonated with you!
Note : This is a general reading or collective reading. It may or may not resonate with you. Please take what resonates and leave what doesn't. And it's totally okay if our energies aren't aligned!
How to pick : Take a deep breath and choose a pile which you feel most connected to! You can choose more than one pile, it just means both pile have messages for you!
Note : This reading is based on my intuition and channeled messages from tarot cards.
I worked really hard on this pile please show some love by leaving comments, likes and reblogs!
Liked my blog or readings? Tip me! | My Paid Readings
Pile 1:
(The cards I got for you - Ace of wands, Queen of wands, 7 of cups, 5 of cups, 7 of pentacles and 8 of pentacles)
The first thing I hear and feel Emotional, Vulnerable and very Experimental, You both will experiment a lot on your first night. I also feel you are both versatile in your sex life and open with it. I also feel your first night with your future spouse is gonna be very memorable, like any other sex or intimate time with them can't top it, this experience of yours with them, it's gonna be quite passionate and wild as well. For some of you very possessive and rough too, like they will like marking their territory on you, you might both start with simple conversations and it will go from there, I feel your future spouse will be rough as well as caring with you, like being gentle and asking before they slid themselves into you, I feel they will be into sex toys or they would like to use expensive toys on you vibrators, dildo, they like to see you squirm, while they play with you, some of you might be into light foreplay or choking, there won't be much talking but lots of moans and grunts or light sounds from you or them, Before they enter inside you they will like to tease you a lot, like maybe until you just put it inside yourself, they will chuckle a lot, they might like to say "hungry for me, baby", "so ready for me already", little chats here are there but it will turn you on so much. They might be experienced and confident with their moves and thrusts, them touching your clit or fingering while they suck you is what i am also channeling, you both or one of you will be blindfolded too, while doing your reading i saw silk sheets, so it may be prominent, dim lights, you will be doing it all night like 3 rounds 4 rounds and even more, i don't see you getting tired, some of you guys can be virgin too, your sex will be very experimental using food, them using lots of toys on you, that much is very prominent. They might make you orgasm many times in a row, and after gathering more energy you will be going at it again. i also feel some of you like to wear uniforms or your partner. Earth and fire placements are very prominent for this pile.
Phew, give me a cold ice water to shower i need it after this reading.
Pile 2:
(The cards i got for you - The star, judgement, Knight of cups, queen of cups, queen of pentacles, 8 of cups and the hermit)
First thing I feel they like to watch you touch yourself or vice versa. Like they will see you all worked up your fingers moving inside you it will turn them on, They will praise you a lot, like "good girl", "just like that", "keep doing that", For some of you the sex will be very traditional like you might not be that open with it, so you will a bit shy with them while they touch you, i also feel some of you guys will be doing it standing or on different corners of the house, in front mirrors, not much experimental, but i feel some people with this pile like missionary a lot, your spouse will appreciate your body a lot, like they are awestruck by it, their simple touch could make you wet, the sex with you both will be very transformative or life changing like you never experienced it before, they might be your boyfriend already so they already know your turn on's, I feel they will be also very gentle with you and caring, vanilla sex, not very rough, but emotional caring and loving kind, it will feel a very cosmic union like your bodies made to fit together, i feel they will kiss you a lot while they thrust themselves into you, some of you will be overwhelmed with the pleasure and be crying in a pleasurable way of course, i feel they will wipe your tears and be very gentle like making sure you are okay with all of it, I also feel this pile also have some bi readers, like very feminine energy from this pile, or if not then i feel your spouse is in touch with their feminine side, oral sex is also here too they will lick the parts that will just make your eyes roll back like crazy, "don't stop" - you or them might be saying this a lot, they will kiss your neck a lot, or rubs your back while they slowly pull themselves into you, they like to make sure you are enjoying it as much as they are. "unorthodox sex" is also very prominent with this pile. I also feel very decorated bed with roses on them. Air signs and water sign, cancer placements is also prominent here.
awww, you two seem like soft couples, your first night is very sweet to be honest.
Pile 3:
(The cards I got for you - The devil, 8 of wands, queen of swords, knight of wands, ace of wands, ace of cups, two of cups, 4 of wands and the temperance)
Okay so the first thing i felt and heard very lustful and the type you were both waiting for it for this very day, the night with your future spouse will be very passionate, and intense, your spouse might like to talk between sex, using dirty language with you "i heard such a whore", "my slut", "you like that when i touch you like that. don't you?" for some of you might be waiting till marriage. You both will be like wild rough animal like just not caring for a little marks on your body, as i said very lustful and yet passionate and balanced, the chemistry between you both is undeniable like physical chemistry check, emotional chemistry that checks out too, i wont go in their personality but that message just kept coming up but okay!, you both will be very naughty on you first night, you and your spouse might be into bdsm, he is very seductive or would, will give you multiple orgasms, I also feel ice cubes will be used on your first night, i heard "you are mine and i hope you know that", they won't care if someone hears you outside your room, they will be very rough, i feel they wont be able to wait till you change your wedding clothes, like even a quickie before you finally give yourself to each other, for some of you already had sex with them before marriage, but mostly, it will be your first time with them, the night will be very long, i feel they will make the atmosphere around you like aromatic candles, lavender/jasmine? light scents, your future spouse would like to lick your clit a lot, they like giving you orgasms, you both try many new positions, doggy style or cowgirl reverse, its very funny how you both are so wild, lustful and yet passionate its like perfectly balanced, your first night will go on long, you might do it all night not sleeping at all, very intellectual and powerful wedding night, it will imprint on you, unforgettable, I also feel they are veryyy experienced just like pile 1, they know what they are doing, they won't tease you a lot because they are very much impatient just to take you, he will ask you to ride him a lot, you bouncing on him, he will give you hickey's like would be soo excited to show everyone you had a very great night, It wont be just sex, its a passionate union between the true divine lovers, i heard "Kamasutra sex" might be of importance, I also feel they will like to cum all over you, or on your tits, your bodies will just blend together perfectly, you both will cum together a lot, this pile might be virgin too, for some of you the sex is rough as well very peaceful, white color also have a importance in both of your lives or on your first night, as i said the chances are you both doing it for the first time the message was very strong, you both will rest very less but in the end you will be cuddling and sleeping together. I also feel the sex between you both will be very very sweaty.
wow, the message just kept coming and i gotta say very wild my pile 3 very wild, love it for you guys!
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Thank you for stopping by! Take care and remember you are loved <3
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hyuuukais · 2 months
Note
Hiii!! I saw ur requests were open but if this makes u uncomfy for any reason no worries. I was skating home from work today and kinda got scraped up pretty bad so I was wondering if you'd write a Skz reaction to reader getting hurt by skating(I was skateboarding but if you want separate scenarios you can use roller skates or ice skates too I think that would be cool) and maybe nursing reader back to health idk just something fluffy? I was kinda discouraged from skating after I got all scraped up today :/
Ps. I love ur blog and I hope you have a great day/night 🩷
-🔮(if u have emoji anons I'd like to be this one)
⋆✴︎˚。⋆ SKZ SCENARIOS ⋆。˚✴︎⋆
pairing : ot8 x reader
notes : hi !! i didn't know if you wanted texts or written, so i did a mix, i hope that's alright with you! and i actually don't have any emoji anons rn, you'd be my first, which is so exciting!! and i love love love the one you chose. i took your advice and did a variety of different types of skates :) oh! and this doesn't make me uncomfortable, little injuries/sick fics like this is okay :33
warnings : injuries (scraped knees/hands/face/arms, sprained wrist/ankle/concussion), blood mention, nausea, mentions of passing out/blacking out, reader called pet names (baby, honey, love), food mention
CHAN (wc: 561)
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There's a knock on your door exactly eleven minutes later, and you trudge across your living room to open it. Chans face is etched with concern, his eyebrows furrowing deeper as he takes in the light bruising starting to appear on your cheekbone, a few red scratches from the tough asphalt accentuating the purple.
Without a word, he enters your living space and sets a small bag down on the coffee table. Chan takes some things out, then gestures you to move down the hallway to your bathroom. Suppressing a groan, you do as he says, trying not to wince every time you step. Another, much worse scrape paints your knee, stinging with every movement. By the time you're sitting on the edge of the tub, your eyes have watered in pain.
Chan kneels in front of you, looking up to into your watery eyes, but you avoid his gaze. With a soft sigh, he takes the bottle of peroxide and dampens a cloth, gently pressing it down on your bloody knee. You hiss at the contact, squeezing your eyes shut hard as he continues to pat the wound and surrounding flesh. It hurts so bad, and you swear you can feel your knee throbbing. What feels like hours is mere minutes, Chan taking the cloth away from your skin to reach for a nearby bandage. He takes care in wrapping the wound, placing a small kiss on the top of your knee once he's done.
"Now, let me see that pretty face of yours." Chan joins you on the edge of the rub, bringing a hand up to gently turn your face to his. "Doesn't look as bad as I thought, but it still needs to be cleaned... you're doing so good for me, baby."
He smiles at you, wiping a stray tear that's managed to escape from the corner of your eye. Your jaw clenches as he brings the cloth, freshly dampened in peroxide, to your skin again, patting in the same motion he did your knee. The sting isn't as bad, the cuts smaller and quicker to clean. As soon as Chan is done placing the smaller bandage on your cheekbone, he places a kiss over it. His palm comes to rest on your lower cheek and jaw, resting your foreheads together. Naturally, your eyes flutter shut as you relax under his touch, the pain and embarrassment forgotten almost completely in his presence.
"I love you," You whisper, sighing contently.
"I love you too," Chan smiles, backing his face away from yours. "How about you change into some comfy clothes and we put on that show you've been on about? Sound good?"
A smile breaks out on your face at the mention of the show, nodding excitedly at his suggestion. "We'll have to start at the beginning! I've been dying to show it to you."
He laughs, his eyes almost shutting from how wide his smile has gotten watching you grab his hand and lead him out of the bathroom. You're still talking as you change, but Chan just leans back on the bed listening, not daring to interrupt. He loves it when you're like this, gushing about your interests to your hearts content. It seems like a flip has switched from your dim mood, and Chan is glad he could do something to make you feel better.
MINHO (wc: 526)
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And he does, he marches right to you despite the protests of the coaches spread on the chilled ground, one of which is making their way toward you. Slipping and sliding all the way to you, Minho makes it to your side first and tries to assess the situation.
"What happened?" Minho demands, placing a hand on your shoulder.
You've managed to sit up on your butt, feeling the cold ground seeping through your bottoms as you curl into yourself. Keeping your wrist close to your chest, you take deep breaths, in through the nose, out through the mouth. Staying calm is the only way you'll get through the throbbing pain in your wrist.
The coach stops just short of you, kneeling on the opposite side of Minho. "Y/n! Are you alright? That was a really bad fall."
All you can do is shake your head, eyes unmoving from the spot between your knees. With the nausea you're feeling, the only thing keeping you from jumping to the conclusion you've broken a bone is the fact you never heard a crack.
One minute, you were gliding on the ice, acing your practice jumps and having fun. The lessons you're doing have been going on for a few months now, and you've been getting better with each one. Knowing you've always wanted to try learning to skate, Minho had paid for a full year of lessons for your birthday, and you'd almost cried when he told you.
Yet, here you are, once again close to tears for a completely different reason. You knew not to put your arms out the way you did, landing on your wrist at an odd angle. Next thing you knew, you could barely move as pain seized you and threatened to have you black out.
"Honey," Minhos voice is next to your ear, one of his hands rubbing your back soothingly. "Let me help you up, we need to go."
-
Hours later, you've traveled to the hospital, been seen by a doctor, and sent home with a sprained wrist. The whole way home, there's been a pout on your face, and all you want to do now is lay down in bed and cry.
Minho can tell, he always can, so when you get home he leads you in the direction of the living room. At first, you're confused, but then he kisses your forehead and brings you the first furball he can find. Soonie gets comfortable in your lap as Minho leaves the room, coming back a few minutes later with the comforter from your bed.
"I know you want to change and go to bed," He says softly into your ear, placing another kiss on your lobe with a playful nibble that makes you giggle. "I know you're embarrassed. De-stress a bit first, calm down, then I'll run you a hot bath and we can settle in for the night."
"I guess I can do that," You mumble, leaning your head on his shoulder.
"Uh-uh, you will do that." Minho pats your head, and you can practically hear the smirk in his voice. "I'm not leaving you with a choice."
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CHANGBIN (wc:541)
It's not even ten minutes later that you spot him jogging down the street to meet you. You've scooted back into the grass to stay out of the way of other pedestrians, using your cold water bottle to soothe the scrapes on the palms of your hands. As soon as Changbin sees you, he's by your side and taking away the bottle, replacing it with his loving touch. He places a kiss on each palm, taking care to brush away the tiny pieces of ground off your skin.
Maybe it's how soft he's holding you, or just him being so quick to be with you when you're hurt, but you can feel tears well up in your eyes. The sound of your sniffles catches Changbin's attention immediately, and one of his hands is already on your face to thumb the tears away before they've even had the chance to fall.
"Bunny," Changbin coos, a pout on his face. "It's okay, you're okay. Let's get you cleaned up, how's that sound?"
You nod, letting him undo the laces of the roller skates, sliding them off your feet carefully. Thankfully, you didn't twist an ankle or anything, and you're honestly a bit surprised you didn't with the way you fell. Changbin ties the laces together, swinging them over his shoulder. Next, he helps you to your feet.
"You couldn't have brought me proper shoes to walk back in?" You joke, trying to find some humour in the situation.
"Why would I when I can do this-?" Hands hook under your legs and behind your back as he swings you into his arms bridal-style. You can't help but giggle at his antics, covering your face in embarrassment as a passer-by gives you two a look. Changbin lifts your torso close to him, placing a soft kiss to the top of your head.
Changbin carries you like this the whole fifteen minutes back home, keeping his head up high, proud of somewhat showing you off as you go, even if that wasn't the intent of holding you like this. Even when you do arrive home, he still refuses to let you go until you're safely in your bedroom, placing you down on the plush mattress. When you go to sit up, he pushes you back down gently, shaking his head.
"Stay put, let me do this!" Changbin almost whines, and you supress another fit of giggles at his reactions. "I want to treat you."
"It's just some scraped palms-"
"Yah!" He scolds, lifting up a hand. "You're still hurt. I'm not letting you do a thing for the rest of the evening."
Rolling your eyes playfully, you watch as Changbin goes into the en suite and comes back with some alcohol wipes. He sits next to you on the bed and takes one hand in his, gently patting down the scrapes. Mostly, your hands are just red from the fall, no longer bleeding at all, but Changbin still wraps your hands just in case, placing a kiss on each one afterwards.
"Next time, wait for me, okay?" Changbin looks at you, a small pout still present on his face.
"Yeah, yeah... I will," You promise, reaching out for him. "Now come here, I want cuddles."
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HYUNJIN (wc: 549)
The whole right side of your face is bright red, a pouch of ice ironically held up to the raw skin. Hyunjin's face drops as he spots you across the arena, hurrying around to get to you. Once he does, he takes the hand holding the pouch away, examining your face.
"It's not as bad as it looks, probably," You say weakly, looking him in the eye. "I haven't actually seen, so that may be a lie."
"Does it hurt a lot?" You shake your head at his question. "Does anything else hurt?"
"My shoulder, a bit," You admit, dropping your gaze. "I landed weird, but I think it'll be fine. It's definitely not broken or dislocated, just sore."
Hyunjin shakes his head, looking out at the ice where other people are still skating. In his head, the world should have stopped for you the minute your body made contact with the ice. He huffs, breath coming out in a little cloud. Turning to him, you poke his arm to gain his attention back.
"I'm fine, really," You promise, but his expression tells you he doesn't quite believe that. "Can we just... go home?"
Nodding, Hyunjin stands and offers his hand to you. Not for physical support, but emotional, walking hand in hand out of the arena. The hallways are quiet as you detour for a bathroom break before leaving.
When you enter, the first thing you notice is just how red your skin has gotten, a noticeable difference from the other half of your face, but you can't help but snort. In all honesty, you look funny. The pain is low on a scale of 1-10, so you're able to find a bit more humour in the situation than Hyunjin at the moment. Once you exit, Hyunjin immediately grasps your hand in his again, his tight grip comforting. If anything, you're more embarrassed than anything.
Getting back to your place doesn't take long, and Hyunjin makes a beeline for your bathroom as you're still taking your coat off. You take your time meeting him in there, seeing some cream set out on the counter. As soon as you walk in, Hyunjin gestures for you to sit on the edge of the tub. Carefully, he puts a few small globs of the cream on your face. It stings a little, but feels nicer as he rubs it into the sore skin. His fingers glide over the curves of your face, taking care to cover every inch of your injury. When he's done, he turns your body and begins massaging the shoulder you landed on.
"Never downplay your pain, you hear me?" Hyunjin lightly scolds, resting his chin on your head as he pauses his actions.
"I meant it when I said it didn't really hurt." You giggle when Hyunjin sighs loudly at your answer. "But I won't, I swear. Does me promising this make you feel better?"
"Honestly?" Hyunjin hums, thinking for a moment. "No, not really, because I know you."
You can hear the teasing smile in his voice, the corners of your lips twitching into your own smile. His arms come around you, gently rocking you side to side, his plush lips pressing a kiss to your temple. Just having him by your side is healing enough.
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JISUNG (wc: 608)
The gasp that leaves Jisung's mouth has people around him shooting weird glances, but all he's focused on his your body lying on the cement. There are a few shouts as he runs down to your body, slipping and sliding all the way down to you. You roll onto your back to see Jisung's face right above yours, eyes widening at how quickly he'd gotten to you.
"Baby! Are you okay? Are you hurt? Do we need to go to the hospit-" Jisung rambles, but you cut him off with a groan as you sit up, shaking your head, and he immediately stops talking.
You sit up cross-legged, taking a look over your limbs. With your elbows and knees protected, you've managed not to scrape anything. One of your new friends come running over as soon as she sees your on the ground, kneeling next to you on you other side.
"You okay?" She asks, looking you up and down.
"I'm fine, both of you." With some semi unnecessary help from Jisung, you stand up. "The only thing bruised here is my ego."
"Maybe we should go to the side for a second-" Jisung stops talking when the girl shoots him a look.
Noticing the way she's looking at him, you gently push her to the side and whisper something to her. She nods, giving one last look to Jisung before walking away. Taking a hold of Jisung's hand, you and him make your way back up and to your bag. He grabs it for you as you lead him over to a bench on the side.
Neither of you talk for a few minutes as you sip some water, looking out to everyone still skating, your own board sitting between your feet. It's a vibrant blue with orange accents, something Jisung picked out for you to celebrate you getting back into skating, along with the matching knee and elbow pads. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Jisung fiddling with his fingers.
"I said I'm okay, you don't need to worry," You say with a soft laugh, turning your body to face him. He doesn't look at you, but he nods. "Sungie?"
"What if the board I got you is defective and that's why you fell?" Jisung looks at you briefly, glancing back to his fingers as he continues to voice his anxieties. "Or- or what if you hadn't had the pads and really got hurt?"
"Ji, look at me, please." You cup his cheek, gently making him turn; sad eyes stare back at you and your heart hurts just a bit. "None of this was because of you, and don't think of what could have happened. What matters is that I'm alright, and so are you, okay?"
He nods, and you can see a little bit of relief on his features with the small smile he gives you. You return the smile, bringing his face over to lean your foreheads together. After a moment, he pulls away just enough to place a kiss on your temple, whispering against your skin.
"You know I'd do anything for you." Jisungs hand tangles with yours, and you can feel your smile widen. "Anything, hurt or not. I'd stay by your side for a papercut."
This makes you laugh. "Remind me to text you next time I get one."
Your comment makes Jisung smile against your skin, and you back away enough to look him in the eye.
"Ready for me to go back out there?"
He nods, an embarrassed blush dusting his cheeks. "Yes, but if you do get hurt, I will be running back down there."
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FELIX (wc: 851)
The two of you started the night off with some hot cocoa from a stand outside of the ice rink you were going to. Felix had been practically dying to take you out to the festival going on during the week once you both had a little time off, especially knowing your love for skating. Although the rink is small, he knew you'd love it anyway.
Now you're sitting on the side, sliding your shoes off and the skates on. The rentals fit a little loosely from all the usage, but still well enough once you tighten the laces. You help Felix with the fit of his, and all he can do is stare at you lovingly as you do this small act of service for him.
Holding hands, you lap around the ice smoothly a few times before slowing down. Neither of you really want to get off the ice yet, but you're legs are beginning to burn from the constant activity. There's a food truck of to the side, so you agree to take a break to eat and rest before continuing. You make a beeline for it on the other side of the rink, opting to go straight through rather than take your skates off early and walk around.
It's sudden, and you barely register you're falling until you've rolled off to the side. Pain radiates from your ankle, and Felix is by your side in an instant. When you look down to assess the damage, you notice your shoelace has become untied on one skate and is probably the cause of the fall. You frown; after all the years of skating, you know how to tie your laces tight enough. The one night you decide to use rentals, and you fall on your ass.
"Can you stand?" Felix asks, concern written all over his face.
You nod, letting him help you up. As soon as you put pressure on your right foot, your knees are buckling and you can't help but yelp in pain. Felix catches you, holding you tightly so you don't fall again.
"Love?" Felix holds you back a little, guiding you to sit down; thankfully, you were pretty much at the other side of the rink already. "Let me see... oh."
He pulls the skate off, along with your sock, to reveal the red, angry skin of your ankle, already beginning to swell slightly. Felix shakes his head, gently pushing your sock back up. You hiss in pain as his fingers brush the skin, an he looks up at you with worried eyes.
"We need to get you checked out, this looks bad." Felix takes your other skate off. "I'll be right back."
You watch him skate back to the other side to retrieve your belongings, manoeuvring through the crowds of people on the ice swiftly. When he returns, he helps you slip your left boot on, leaving the right one off just in case. People around you have barely even noticed the way you limp off the ice, Felix holding your right side to help take off the pressure. It doesn't take long for Felix to drive to the hospital from the rink. Despite the cold air, all you can focus on is the uncomfortable warmth from your ankle.
-
Entering your house with a groan, you hop stubbornly to your couch, covering your red face in embarrassment. Felix laughs softly at your reaction, kicking his shoes off before joining you. Gently, he brings your hands away from your face and brings one of his to turn your chin to look at him.
"Everyone makes mistakes, love," Felix cups your cheek when you pout. "One twisted ankle from busted skates isn't the end of the world. You'll heal, and I'll be here the whole time."
"What about-"
"No." Felix says firmly, shaking his head. "I'll be here. You're not allowed to walk without my help until you're better. Now," He takes a pillow, standing up and placing it down where he was sitting. "Let's get this thing elevated."
Felix takes your foot with care, lifting it onto the pillow. He leans over to kiss your forehead before leaving to the kitchen behind you.
"Comfort food?" He calls out, and you look back confused; he just leans against the counter with a small smile. "We didn't get to eat before, and I want you to be as comfortable as possible. I'll bring the flowers in for you too."
"You're too good to me," You sigh, but nod your head. "I'd love that. Can we just... cuddle after?"
"Of course we can." Felix's voice gets closer as he comes back to place another kiss on your forehead, but you want the real deal, reaching up to pull him closer by the neck.
His soft lips connect with yours and you melt into it, smiling into the kiss. When you eventually pull back, Felix leans his head on yours.
"I swear your kisses can heal me," You say quietly.
Felix looks down to where your foot sits atop the pillow, still red and swollen. "Nope, still twisted."
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SEUNGMIN (wc: 922)
It's another ten minutes until you see Seungmin approaching from the other side of the food court, standing right as your eyes land on him. His hands are tucked behind his back, piquing your interest as he's clearly hiding something. Instead of stopping when he gets to you, Seungmin turns and walks a few steps backward, nodding you over to follow him with a smirk on his face. You run up to him, trying to see what he's hiding, but he keeps moving in a way you can't.
"Be patient, we need to get outside." Seungmin groans, but you can hear the playfulness in his voice.
"You know I don't like surprises-"
"No, you like to say you don't," He counters, and you feel the corners of your lips tug upward. "I know you better than that."
You exit the mall a few moments later, having only met there as a convenient spot between your two homes. Seungmin gestures you over to the emptier side of the parking lot wrapping around, and you spot a small picnic area set up; your heart skips a beat seeing the effort Seungmin has put into this.
"Min..." You run up to the picnic table, eyes gazing over the set up; there are small cakes and treats and your favourite takeout all organized on the wooden structure. You're about to speak again, but gasp instead when you turn and see what he's holding out.
Seungmin smiles at your reaction, holding your previously broken skateboard up with both hands. The wheel had broken from years of use, and you haven't had the time to go out and get it fixed, so it's been collecting dust in the corner of your room for weeks. To see that Seungmin went out of his way to have it fixed as a surprise for your anniversary date was enough to make you tear up.
Seeing your expression, Seungmin places the board on the ground and comes up to you, pulling you gently by the hands over to it. He knows how much you love to skate, how important this is for you, so he thought it'd be a nice surprise. He places a kiss on your temple, urging you to get on.
You spend the next thirty minutes or so going back and forth on the sidewalk by the table, stopping to have a few bites and talk to Seungmin. He stares at you as you head away from him again, his lips twitching up into a small smile when he sees how much you're enjoying yourself. When you turn around, you go a bit faster, wanting to get back to Seungmin quickly to give him his gift. You don't notice the way your board goes of on an angle, too excited.
"Baby, I have someth- woah!" You collide with the hard ground, cement scraping your arms as you tumble.
"Y/n!" Seungmin shoots out of his seat, kneeling next to you and helping you into a sitting position. "God, what the hell? Are you okay?"
"I fall and the first thing you say to me is 'what the hell'," You try and laugh, but your eyes are stinging with unshed tears at the pain in your forearms.
Seungmin lifts your arms to him, inhaling sharply at the bloody scrapes decorating your skin. Dropping your arms, he runs back to the table, grabbing his bag. You watch him with a confused look until you spot the small first aid kit in his open bag.
"Always prepared," You mumble, pouting. You really lucked out with Seungmin.
"With a partner as clumsy as you? Of course I am," He jokes, taking out some wipes.
His touch is light as he pats the wounds, looking up at you every so often to make sure you're alright. Although you're making faces every time the wipe comes in contact with your skin, at least you aren't close to crying anymore, now used to the slight burning sensation on your raw skin. Seungmin carefully places some large bandaids on the scrapes, kissing each one as he does; his care makes your heart ache.
"I'll pack up and we can head back to yours. I don't want you getting hurt again." Seungmin declares, standing and helping you back on your feet.
"What? No," You shake your head, grabbing Seungmin's hand before he can get much further. "I want to enjoy our date how it was meant to be. They're just a few bumps and bruises, nothing I can't handle."
Seungmin looks at you, and you can tell he doesn't want to do that. What he wants is to take care of you, wrap you up in a warm blanket and never let you go. After a moment, he sighs, and you can tell he's giving in to the look you're giving him.
"Fine, but on one condition." You wait for him to continue. "We go in and buy you some new knee pads and stuff. Then you let me pamper you when we get to yours."
"Kim Seungmin, are you admitting you care about me?" You laugh, poking his cheek; he swats your hand away softly.
"Never in your wildest dreams."
"I don't know, my dreams can get pretty wild... oh!" You run over to your bag, digging to the bottom to grab an envelop. "Your gift!"
Seungmin laughs at your sudden change in topic, eyeing the envelop. Inside are two tickets to see his favourite baseball team, and you can't wait to see the look on his face.
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JEONGIN (wc: 862)
"Yes, I can see." Jeongin wraps his arm around your shoulders, pressing a kiss to your temple.
"Oh!" You're surprised a bit from the sudden appearance and affection of your boyfriend, but lean into him. "I wasn't expecting you to be here yet."
"I got out early. Let's go get the skates."
Jeongin keeps a hand on your back the whole way to the line up to retrieve the skates. Although you have your own, he still needs some, so you wait in line with him and catch up on your days. The whole time you're talking, you can't help but be a little stuck on his comment earlier, wondering if he was being serious, but you know neither of you like grand, public gestures like that.
The rink isn't incredibly busy for a Friday night, and you aren't complaining. It's easier to do and go where you want, colourful lights reflecting off the shiny ground. You look at Jeongin beside you, reds and blues and greens dancing over his sharp features; you're mesmerized.
Which is definitely what causes you to go crashing into the wall of the rink, losing your balance and falling backward. The back of your head smacks the hard ground, and you can feel tears stinging the corners of your eyes at the impact. Before you can really react, there are already gentle hands on your head trying to assess the damage. Your ears are ringing a bit, but you can hear your boyfriend's voice from above you and open your eyes, having squeezed them shut in pain.
"Y/n? Baby?" Jeongin's voice becomes clearer as he helps you sit up against the wall. "Say something, please. You're freaking me out."
"My head hurts," You whine, pouting and bringing your own hands to your head; you aren't bleeding, but there's sure to be a bump tomorrow.
"Yeah, I wonder why." Jeongin clears his throat, signaling some staff over. "We'll get you off the rink carefully, okay? You probably gave yourself a concussion or something."
It doesn't take long to get off the rink, and you let Jeongin take your skates off, too busy with holding your face in your hands to block the lights out. What you once saw as a beautiful, mood-setting atmosphere was now giving you the worst headache of your life. You keep a hand above your eyes as you leave, another attempt to block light while still being able to see where you're going.
Jeongin helps you into his car, driving you to the nearest hospital. Inside, you keep your eyes closed during the long wait, burying your head into Jeongin's shoulder. You're so grateful for him staying with you, the way his hand rubs up and down your arm bringing you comfort; movements reserved for you, and only you.
The doctor confirms you have a mild concussion, discussing the details of your rest and recover before sending you home. Once you get in, you collapse onto your couch with a groan of embarrassment.
"Want me to make you something?" You look up to see Jeongin setting his bag down and taking his coat off, giving him a confused look. "What? You really think I'm just going to drop you off at home, in pain, and dip?"
"You have things to do tomorrow-"
"Not anymore." Jeongin moves toward your kitchen. "Cancelled everything this week. I can't have you alone right now."
The casual tone of his voice has you melting, looking on at him with adoration in your eyes. You watch as he prepares you something, bringing over your favourite homemade comfort food. When he sets it down on the coffee table, you look up at him from where you're now curled up on the couch under a blanket.
"Would you hate me if I said I was too nauseous to eat right now?" You ask quietly, barely holding his gaze.
"Of course," Jeongin says with a smirk.
You reach out to smack him playfully, temporarily forgetting about your concussion and moving way too quickly. Grabbing onto the arm of the couch, you steady yourself from the wave of dizziness. Jeongin is instantly kneeling down and leaning you back, lightly scolding you as he does. A small smile forms on your face.
"You're lucky I love you," You giggle, looking at him with partially closed eyes.
"I am. I really am." Jeongin sighs, getting up to sit next to you.
Pulling him closer with your eyes closed, your hands brush the corner of something sticking out of his pocket, eyes instantly opening back up. You catch a glimpse of the corner of a red box before Jeongin begins bringing your blanket over him, but you stop him.
"You weren't kidding?" You look at him with wide eyes. It takes a moment to register what you're talking about, and then he begins to blush, hard.
"I wasn't."
"Jeongin-" He holds a finger to your lips to silence you.
"No, don't say anything. I want to wait until you're feeling better, okay?" You nod, and he leans in to kiss your cheek. "Now rest, baby. Need you healed up so I can do this the right way."
-
notes - HELP i actually don't know how to write anymore or smthn??? i'm so sorry if this is ass. me vs feeling insecure abt my writing ahahahahaha anyway. thank u for the request! i feel like maybe this didn't go the right direction sjdksk this is partially unedited too bc i kind of can't stand to reread my own writing so many times rn, so i apologize for any mistakes 🤡
─── taglist : @chaeryred @toplinelix @channie-143 @staysinbloom
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annwrites · 4 months
Text
i’m fuckin’ begging you
— pairing: billy hargrove x fem!reader
— type: part of a series
— summary: the morning after you & billy have your first intimate moment together, it's like he's reverted back to who he was in hawkins. you go to a drive-in theater that night in tx with him & have a mental breakdown in a restroom over his treatment of you. he then shows you his love in shades of black & blue, & when you go to finally leave for good, he tells you just who it is, exactly, that you belong to.
— tags: billy going back to being a MASSIVE asshole bc he's terrified of commitment & vulnerability. billy gets into his first fist-fight over you. billy staking a claim. ANGST.
— tw: drugs, violence
— word count: 7.4k
— a/n: yeah, he's toxic, but we're all about that on this blog, so.
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The smell of salt air wafts into the Camaro's cabin, and the sound of crashing waves and the call of seagulls envelope the two of you. You'd finally made it. Billy was home and you'd stayed with him every mile of the way. You were his. Completely.
He sits in the front seat of his Camaro, you atop him in his lap, legs spread, him buried inside of your warm wetness. He grips your bare hips under your sundress, gently rocking your hips against him.
He reaches up, cupping your cheek, your soft hair tumbling over your slender shoulders as you smile warmly down at him, eyes full of adoration, kindness, care. When had someone last looked at him in such a way? No judgement, no hatred, no harsh words or actions against him.
"Billy." You call softly to him.
He tucks a lock of hair behind your ear. "Say it, baby, please. I need to hear it."
You reach up, resting your left hand atop his shoulder, fingers burying themselves in his hair, a silver ring glinting against the bright California sun high in the sky, a breeze washing over both of you through the open windows.
"Billy," you say again, sweetly.
His other hand that's not cupping your face gently squeezes your hip. "Please, angel, no one has said it to me since my mom left. Please... I feel it, too."
"Billy."
As you continue rocking your hips against his, his brows furrow. Something isn't right. Doesn't feel right.
"Billy."
His eyes slowly open, sunlight streaming in from a window to his right and you're hovering overtop of him, brows furrowed. "Hey, you need to get up. We have to be checked out soon."
He sits up suddenly, pushing you away from him, nearly causing you to fall off of the bed. "Get the fuck off of me," he says, standing.
You roll your eyes. Clearly not a morning person you now knew.
"Good morning to you, too," you say sarcastically.
He turns back to you. "What time is it?"
"Twenty till."
"Why the fuck did you let me sleep so long?"
You withdraw a little at his harsh, aggressive tone. "You were tired and I just wanted to let you rest."
He walks over to his bag.
"Don't worry, I got all our stuff together."
He turns back to you with a sneer. "You went through my shit?"
Your hands begin to shake. Where was the Billy from last night? You were so sure things would be far different today. Going forward in general. Easier, sweeter, kinder.
You stand. "No, I just put your things away. I didn't go through it. I was trying to be nice."
He unzips it, pulling out an outfit, dressing himself, not looking at you. "Get your shit and get down to the car."
You walk over to your bags, shrugging them on. You don't speak to him again as you open the door. Before you can step over the threshold, he calls to you.
You look back to him, hopeful for an apology.
Instead, he says, "Don't ever touch my things again. Got it?"
You nod, then exit the room.
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You sit silently in the passenger seat as Billy crosses the Texas border—his tire had been ready to go before the two of you even pulled up to the auto shop. And once the car was ready, he'd immediately hit the road, not even bothering to stop somewhere for breakfast.
You glance to him out of the corner of your eye and wonder if maybe his attitude was from a hangover instead. He hadn't seemed drunk. And while you had a slight headache, you felt fine yourself. If you weren't hungover, then surely he wouldn't be either. Would he?
"Are you okay?" You ask quietly.
He glances to you, then looks back to the road. "Why wouldn't I be?"
"You're...you seem upset."
He rolls his eyes. "Just tired of being stuck in this fuckin' car all the time and having to do all the driving and every ounce of the work around here."
You wince. "I would if I knew how..." You say softly.
"Yeah, well, you don't. And I'm not about to start teaching you so you can burn up the fucking clutch, causing just one more problem to be added onto my plate."
You look out the windshield, tears burning your eyes. "Do...do you regret last night?"
He grows quiet for a moment, jaw flexing. Hard. Then, "Like I told you before, shit like that doesn't mean anything to me. We both got off. Doesn't need to be more than that."
Your lip quivers and you look out the passenger side window at the other passing cars, your stomach tying itself in knots now. How could you have ever trusted him in allowing him to touch you like that? He'd told you what sex—any kind—meant to him. He was consistent in that at least .
He then reaches over, retrieving a cassette from the glovebox and pops it in the radio, Metallica's For Whom the Bell Tolls blaring through the speakers.
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When Billy stops to get gas, you watch from the rearview mirror as he eyes up other girls walking around in Daisy Dukes, mini skirts, and the like. Even whistling his approval at a couple. A tear slips down your cheek and you wipe it away.
Once the car has finished filling, he goes inside and you hang your head, crying softly for just a moment. How could you have ever done that? He'd told you his intentions in getting you drunk—he'd done it to take advantage and he had.
You hadn't felt that way while it was happening, though.
What you had felt had been…something more. You couldn’t acknowledge what. Not now. Not ever.
You’d finally given him exactly what he’d wanted since day one—another notch in his belt, just for you. Well, perhaps not exactly, but something. You felt dirty.
Used.
Cheap. 
Pathetic.
Had the things he’d told you while drinking even been true? About his mom? About how he felt about you? You begin to doubt every single thing he’s said and done since you first met. Or, at the very least, since you got into his car that night.
When you glance in the side mirror, you see him heading back and you quickly gather yourself as best you can manage, not looking his way as he enters the car.
He tosses a plastic bag full of junk food between the two of you, but you somehow know you’re not to touch it. 
“I’m hungry, too,” you say softly.
He takes a bite of a Snickers, then glances up to you. “Your legs aren’t broken and you have cash. Go get somethin’.”
You exit the car then, carefully closing the door behind you.
“Hey!”
You turn back to him, leaning down to the window. 
He leans across the way toward you. “From now on, you start paying for all your own shit. I’m done being your meal ticket. Got it?”
You nod, staying silent. You stand, turning away, then hear him yell “hurry up” as you head inside.
Feeling…not like yourself, you stare blankly at the selection of chips in front of you. Your stomach growls, but you feel like whatever you eat will just come right back up. 
You then walk up front to the attendant behind the counter. “Excuse me?”
The older man turns to you, pausing from putting away cigarette cartons. 
“Do you have a public restroom I could use?” 
He nods toward the back left. 
“Thank you,” you say, walking away.
Once inside, you lock the door behind you, pressing your forehead to it, your sweaty palm slipping off of the metal handle as you begin to cry. Hard.
Your head spins with so many thoughts you’re unable to grab a single one to focus on before the next one hits you. 
You wonder if, perhaps, you should’ve stayed in Hawkins—who cared what happened to you in the long run, anyway? You think of your mother, wondering if she ever cared for you, if she ever thinks of you as often as you do her. You think of Steve and how, while he’d only seen you as a friend and you felt the same toward him, it was someone like him that you needed—someone kind and considerate and non-violent.
You think of Billy and how you had been right to see him as a monster. Had been right to stay away from him in the first place. 
God, what had you done to yourself agreeing to get in his car that night? How much better off would you be right now if you’d kept walking instead? You’d had another opportunity on the interstate, but had caved yet again, returning to him. 
You’re not sure you can hold out until California. Parting ways before then…it may be for the best sooner rather than later. For your own safety, if nothing else.
Surviving your father had taken everything in you. But now you had nothing—truly. A few hundred waning dollars, a watch to pawn, and some clothes. That was it.
You suddenly feel terrified for your future. 
You take a moment to gather yourself, realizing you’re now hyper-ventilating and you turn the sink on and splash handful after handful of cold water onto your flushed face, washing the tears away.
When you return to the car, Billy immediately makes a snide comment. “Took long enough. I thought you were getting somethin’ to eat?”
You stare out the window at a happy couple across the way, knowing you’ll never have that. You’re too broken for it. 
“They didn’t have anything I wanted.”
“Whatever,” he says, turning the car over. 
As he begins to drive away, you finally tear your eyes away from the man and woman and suddenly realize: there’s not a single person in all the world who loves or cares about you.
You want to throw yourself from the moving car at the thought.
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A couple hours later and you’re beginning to feel sick from the heat, but remain quiet. You should’ve at least gotten a bottle of water or two back at the station, but you’d had other things on your mind. 
Billy glances to you, your sullen state, and rolls his eyes. “You’re really starting to harsh my fuckin’ buzz. The hell is the matter with you today? I know it’s not your monthly or I would’ve found out as much last night with my hand between your legs.”
You feel sick at the memory. “I just don’t feel well.”
“Maybe it’s because you didn’t bother to grab anything while I waited for your ass back at the Exxon.”
You stay quiet, tears burning your eyes. 
He tosses a bag of Doritos at you. “Here, eat those. Even if they are fuckin’ mine.”
He only notices how badly your hands are shaking when you try opening the bag. 
He frowns, turning back to the road as you begin to eat one.
"Thanks," you say softly.
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An hour later, Billy finally stops and you’re now seated so far away from him, you’re damn-near climbing out the window. 
He slams his door behind him, leaving you sitting there as he walks up to a taco stand, ordering lunch for himself.
You nearly stumble out of the car, dizzy from your low blood-sugar, but trail along behind him and then order a couple tacos for yourself. 
You go to follow him to a table, until he walks over to a blonde girl who’s wearing a pair of colorful shorts and a tye-dye t-shirt, asking if the seat across from her is free.
You sit some ways away, taking occasional bites of your food, sipping at your water, trying to keep everything down. You grip the edge of the table, taking deep breaths.
You’re fine. You’ll be fine.
You have no other choice now but to be. 
Unless…what if you bought a bus ticket? If you went back…what would happen to you? Would…would your dad follow through on his threat? 
Tears sting your eyes when you wonder what your gravestone would say. Certainly not ‘beloved daughter’.
You push your food away, lying your head down, fighting against your gag reflex.
Billy sits across the way, flirting with the girl in front of him. 
“So, do you live around here?” She asks, taking a bite of her food. 
“Nah, doll, I’m just passin’ through.”
He glances to you for just a moment and his brows furrow when he sees you hunched over, face buried in your arms, taking shallow breaths.
She turns, following his line-of-sight, then looks back to him. “Are you with her?”
He smirks, looking to Candy—Candace—he forgets what the fuck she’d told him her name was now. “Not like that. I’ll be rid of her ass once we hit California.” 
He ignores his stomach twisting painfully when he says it.
“Oh, wow. Long ways to go, huh?”
He shrugs, leaning in toward her. “No reason we can’t get to know one another now.”
She laughs, shaking her head and standing, tossing her paper plate in the trash. “Sorry, but I’m not like that. Good luck getting to Cali, though!”
He sighs as she walks away, his eyes trained on her back-end, even if it doesn’t serve to stir any excitement within him.
He comes over to you then, seating himself heavily on the other side of the metal picnic table. “What? Are you sick?”
You don’t respond. 
He reaches for your food. “If you’re not eating it, then I am. No point in letting it go to waste.”
Still nothing and he wonders if you’ve fallen asleep, until you finally raise your head and he feels the blood drain from his face at the look of yours—flushed, sweaty, your eyes a bit glassy. 
You stand. “I’m going to sit in the car.” When you go to step away, you sway on your feet and then he curses.
“Sit the fuck down and eat your food. Now. I don’t need you getting sick all over my car. Because if you do, I’m not paying for the fuckin’ detailing.”
You do as he says, sitting, pulling your taco toward you, even if it doesn’t even seem all that appetizing to you. “You could always leave me here,” you state.
There’s no sarcasm in your voice. No playful tone. Nothing. 
He leans back a bit. “Don’t tempt me.”
You raise your bottle to your lips, your hands shaking and some water spills on your shirt. 
His face falls as he watches you struggle. Either you were sick from the heat…or you were back to the way you were the other night: filled with fear…of him.
He looks down to his food, his own appetite suddenly gone. He eats it anyway.
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Once the two of you are back on the road—your stomachs full, even if neither of you had had an appetite—he turns his radio back on, but leaves it at a comfortable level.
Meanwhile, you think of the watch you’d taken. If the two of you stopped tonight, once you got yourself a room, you’d go in search of a pawn shop. You’d take whatever they offered you. It wasn’t like you were in a place to barter. You then also consider finding out about bus fare. Perhaps to California. 
It won’t be cheap, but even if it takes every cent, you’ll be better off. 
Billy changes lanes, passing the car beside you, then sighs dramatically. “I told you before what sex—all that shit—means to me: nothing. So, what, you’re going to pout now because I don’t want to settle down after one taste? Like it was something to write home about to begin with?”
You put your hand over your mouth. “I’m going to be sick.”
“Fuck,” he says, quickly merging back over, people laying on their horns as he skids to a stop on the shoulder and you wrench your door open and heave over the side of the car.
He then reaches a new level of guilt he never thought possible. He reaches toward you, hand hovering over your back, and then he rethinks the decision, placing it back on the wheel.
Once you’ve emptied your stomach, you reach into the glovebox and wipe your mouth with a napkin, closing your door and settling back against the seat, your skin now slick with sweat, head pounding, a vile taste in your mouth. 
You then look to him out of the corner of your eye, your body shaking. “I’m sorry,” you say quietly.
“It’s fine,” is all the reply he gives before merging back into traffic.
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It’s evening when Billy pulls into a motel, and you exit the vehicle before he’s even shut the engine off, going inside to get yourself a room.
When he follows after you a moment later, he catches the tail-end of your conversation, watching as you go to hand the woman behind the front desk some cash. 
“Alright, so that’s one room with a full-size bed for fifteen.”
He grows angry at the thought of you sleeping away from him, even if he’d told you just a few hours earlier to start paying your own way. Being upset with you for doing as he’d asked... What the fuck was wrong with him?
He steps up beside you, snatching the money out of your hand, stuffing it in your back pocket. 
“I want a queen. One room,” he states, glancing from the woman, then glaring at you.
You shrink away from him, your hopes of getting away from him for just one night now ruined.
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Once inside the room, you nearly collapse on top of your bags as you drop them onto the floor. You then wander over to the bathroom and softly shut the door as you sit to relieve yourself. 
You cringe when you look at yourself in the mirror after. Your skin is a pallid shade, stray hair clinging to your face and there are dark circles beneath your bloodshot eyes. But you simply don’t have it in you to care enough to bother fixing yourself up, so you exit the bathroom as-is.
Billy watches as you wander over to one of your bags and reach inside, pulling something out and stuffing it in your pocket. You then go to leave, until he speaks. 
“The fuck are you doing?”
You just shut the door behind you and he curses, throwing his jacket down as he follows you out. “Hey, get the fuck back here!”
You don’t listen.
He then grabs you roughly by the upper arm, squeezing harshly as he pulls you back to him. “I asked you a goddamn question.”
You fight back against the fear which fills you at his presence now. You know how to play this game. You’ve been doing it your whole life. When a man gets angry: be silent, demure. Respond only minimally. Enough to give them what they want. They won’t hurt you then. Probably.
You reach into your right pocket with a shaking hand and extend it toward him, palm open-faced. “I need to pawn this. My money won’t last long between here and California. Or wherever it is that I end up now.”
His grip loosens, taking the watch, looking over what used to be your dad’s Rolex.
He then looks to you and watches with a pained expression as you reach up, gingerly rubbing the portion of your arm that he’d just had squeezed within his grip.
He hands the watch back to you. “Keep it.”
You look up to him. “I can’t. When my money-”
“I paid for the room, didn’t I?”
Your eyes search his for a moment. “I don’t think I want to go to California anymore.”
His stomach drops. “What?”
You look down to the watch glinting against the sun, the silver still polished—looking like new. “I said West. And in another state or two I’ll be there. I think that’s where I get off.”
His heart begins to pound. You want to leave. You want off this emotional fucking rollercoaster he’s subjected you to every goddamn day. Just as soon as you begin to feel comfortable, he gives you another blow to contend with, leaving you on uncertain ground.
He doesn’t react. Doesn’t beg you to stay. He won’t. If you want to leave him too, then so be it. He never needed you in the first place, clearly. 
He ignores the way his heart squeezes painfully at the thought of an empty passenger seat. An empty bed.
It’s just the heat that’s making his eyes sting.
“Good riddance, then.”
Your chin wobbles as you turn around, heading back up to the room, head hanging between your shoulders, your form utterly fucking defeated.
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Billy eventually, after showering—while you’d sat on the bed staring at nothing—went down to the lobby to ask about local attractions. He needed to get out of that room. He couldn’t take seeing you like that. Couldn’t bear what he was doing to you. 
But he doesn’t know what else to do. He’s not…sappy and romantic and ‘boyfriend’ material. Whatever it is that you’re after—he ain’t it.
He can’t be.
When he returns, you’re still sitting there, hand holding your hurting stomach.
He places his hands on his hips, already regretting inviting you. “You want to go see a movie? They’re having a showing of The Terminator near here in less than an hour.”
You look up to him with empty eyes. You’ve never looked at him like that before. Haven’t looked like that since the night he found you beaten and bloodied on the side of the road.
Something inside him breaks at the realization.
You shrug.
He opens the door. “C’mon then.”
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Once he’s parked—you’d desperately tried to give him money for your ticket, terrified he’d use paying for yours against you at some point, but he’d refused to take the change from you—he leans back against the seat, setting his radio to the correct station.
He rolls his head to the side, looking at you and his heart drops when he sees you turned toward your door, away from him.
He wants to roll it all back—this entire fucking day. How, in less than ten hours, had he managed to do so much destructive damage to not just you, but your relationship as a whole? He’d had an opportunity before him—you—for a better life. A fresh start. Something good, and pure and loving. And he’d not stopped until your heart was crushed to a pulp in his fist.
But the way you’d looked at him last night in bed, the way you’d touched him and kissed him and held him…something had shifted between the two of you. Something big. Something he couldn’t even fathom. He knew what he felt. But what if you didn’t? Or, what if you did, but he turned out just like his dad? He then thinks he’d spent all day doing it—being that—his spitting fucking image. You didn’t need to hit someone to hurt them. To abuse them.
What the fuck did he do?
He glances to the cars around you, then spots a couple up ahead in the back seat of a Barracuda on top of one another.
He smirks. "At least someone's getting laid. Lucky bastard."
You open your door then, nearly falling out of the car. 
“Where the hell do you think you’re going?”
“Restroom,” you reply barely above a whisper, walking away.
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Once you’ve shut yourself in a stall, you sit on the toilet lid and lose it. You begin to bawl so hard you can’t breathe. You’ve not cried like this since your mom left you behind. You double over, wrapping your arms around yourself, shaking, tears and snot streaming down your face. You cry so hard you make yourself sick.
You lean over the toilet, vomiting up stomach acid, which only serves to make you cry harder. 
And you make the decision right then and there: once Billy is asleep, you’re leaving for good. He always sleeps through the night. It’ll give you plenty of time to get away. You’re unsure how late bus stations are open, but you’ll do whatever you must to leave him in the past where he belongs. 
When you exit the restroom—the cool night air washing over you, cooling you down—you take a moment to glance up to the wide sky above you, now filled with stars. And you feel so fucking lonely and empty at the sight. A sight which used to comfort you. Now...
You then slowly step over to the concessions. 
“Can I have a small vanilla shake, please?”
Once you’ve paid, you’re handed your drink, but a voice calls out to you before you can walk around some. You refuse to go back to his car until you’ve at least put something back on your stomach.
“You alright? Looks like you’ve been crying.”
You look to your right and see a man, maybe twenty or twenty-one, leaning up against the side of the concession stand. He has a pair of black cargo shorts on, a black t-shirt with a yellow smiley face on the front, and bleach-blond hair. 
Your wrap your clammy hands around the cool cup in your grip. “I’m fine,” you say quietly.
He crooks his head to the side. “You sure? Might not be able to help, but I’m a good listener.”
You shift from one foot to the other, considering, and then decide to come over to him. You want nothing more to do with Billy. He’s shown who he truly is all day long. Had months ago. What was the saying? When someone shows you who they are the first time, believe them. You should’ve taken such advice.
It would’ve saved you a lot of heartache.
You look up at him, leaning your shoulder against the building, taking a sip of your cold drink.
He extends a hand toward you. “Chris.”
You smile slightly, holding your own out. “Y/N.”
He takes your wet hand in his and presses a soft kiss to the top of it. 
You laugh lightly at the unexpected gesture.
“Don’t tell me your asshole boyfriend is responsible for your tears? A girl like you is way too pretty to be crying over some worthless chump.” He folds his arms across his chest.
“No. It’s…it’s complicated.” To you maybe, but clearly not to him.
He leans his head against the building. “It serious?”
You take another drink. “No. We want different things.”
“Like?”
On the one hand, talking to a strange man again is probably a bad idea. On the other, he ogled and spoke to how many girls today? You could do as you pleased. He had no say in your decisions. Not anymore. He never should’ve in the first place.
You shrug. “I just want someone who will be nice to me.”
“What, that’s supposed to be a tall order? Doesn’t seem all that hard to do to me,” he says, running the back of one of his fingers down your arm. 
You step the least bit closer at the tender gesture. It just feels good to be touched. To have someone listen.
He continues. “What’s he want?”
You sip your shake again. “Your guess is as good as mine,” you say quietly. 
He shifts his stance. “Do you want to be with someone like that? A guy who leaves you guessing, crying, all alone? Sounds like a selfish prick to me.”
No, you don’t want that.
You look down. You normally wouldn’t open up like this to a complete stranger, too worried what they might think, but it’s not as if this day can get any worse. “What if I can’t do any better?”
He smirks. “Talking to me, ain’t ya?”
You both laugh at that.
He then glances around. “I don’t normally do this, but I have something that might make you feel better.”
Your brows furrow as he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small red candy. He looks at you again. “You ever dropped acid before?”
Your stomach drops. “N-no.”
“You want to?”
You shake your head. “No, thank you.”
He sighs. “C’mon, it’s not that bad. I mean, it’ll make you forget all about what’s-his-face. We could get out of here, have some fun as a bit of payback. What’d’ya say?”
He grabs you by the wrist then.
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Billy groans in irritation. You’d been gone nearly twenty-fucking-minutes at this point, already missed the whole beginning of the movie. He glances around, looking for you, but you’re nowhere to be found. He lets you out of his sight for a fucking second and this was what he got for it…
He exits his car, going in search of the restrooms, really ready to give you what-for, even if you missing the movie is his fault. He knew you had just wanted to get away from him. And he can’t exactly get angry at you 'wasting' his money on your ticket, either, since you’d all but begged him to let you pay for yourself. 
And then he spots you, standing near the concessions, some bleach-blond asshole squeezing your face in one hand, the other holding something near your mouth while you shake your head, trying to pull away.
He sees fucking red.
As he nears the two of you, he hears him say, “C’mon, Y/N, we’re just having some fun. So open.”
You drop your milkshake on the ground, vanilla going everywhere and the prick looks at Billy then, eyes widening when he sees the aggressive look which has overtaken his features. 
Billy grabs him by the right arm, pulling him away from you before sucker-punching the side of his face.
He falls to the ground and Billy gets on top of him and just pounds away, landing blow after blow. He eventually hears something break—likely his nose, but he doesn’t stop. “Don’t ever fucking touch her again! You hear me, you fuckin’ piece of shit?” He grips his face then, Billy’s mere inches from it as he screams, “You fucking hear me?!”
His face is so swollen and bloodied, he can barely even make Billy out so as to respond, so he just punches him again. 
You’d stood to the side, horrified, hands covering your mouth as Billy wailed on Chris, beating his face into a bloody pulp, until a crowd began to form. You then rushed forward, grabbing Billy’s arm, his fist still raised in the air. “Billy, stop, you’re going to kill him!”
Then you hear someone yell in the distance, “I’m calling the police!”
You tug harder, forcing him to stand, and then he kicks Chris in the stomach as hard as he can and he doubles over, curling into the fetal position as Billy spits on him. “Fuckin’ loser.” He quickly grabs your hand, leading you back to the car. “C’mon.”
He opens your door, buckling you in, then closes it. 
When you glance up, you see a man getting out of a Plymouth as Billy walks around the front of the Camaro. Billy then points at him. “Get back in your fuckin’ car!”
He gets in the driver’s side and kicks up grass and dirt and rocks as he quickly backs out of the lot, speeding away.
You sit beside him, shaking violently, tears stinging your eyes and you gasp as he nearly hits someone as he swerves into another lane for a moment after taking the on-ramp to get on the interstate. Perhaps five minutes later does he get back off again, now on a lower, more deserted back road.
He flies across the asphalt and your heart pounds as you watch the speedometer climb to over eighty. 
“Billy, slow down. Billy!” 
Ninety. 
“Billy, please, you’re scaring me!”
It’s once he’s hit over one-hundred-and-ten that he stomps on the brakes, your seatbelt nearly choking you as the car lurches forward. Once you’ve slammed back against your seat, you stare at him, eyes wide, tears streaming down your cheeks, chest heaving. 
He’s deathly silent beside you, breathing steadily as he himself stares at the dark road ahead. His eyes are hard, brows furrowed, knuckles bloodied.
You shake your head, unbuckling yourself with trembling hands. “I-I’m done. I can’t do this anymore.”
You open your door, until he reaches across the cabin and slams it back closed again. When you look at him, he grabs your face gently, but firmly, his eyes wild. “You’re fucking mine. You understand me? You’re mine.”
Before you can even reply, he crushes his lips to yours so hard your teeth knock together. He plunges his tongue inside your mouth, his right hand coming to grip the hair at the back of your neck, his other squeezing your hip so hard it hurts.
The only thing you can hear is your heart pounding in your ears and his lips smacking against your own.
He pulls back. “Next time I see another guy touching you, I won’t stop until I have fucking killed him.”
He brings your lips back to his own.
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You remained silent on the way back to the motel. Silent tears slipping down your cheeks, afraid of what you’d now gotten yourself into.
You look at him out of the corner of your eye and wonder how he can now seem so calm. He’d nearly beaten a man to death not even half-an-hour ago. Had also acted more possessive toward you than you’d ever seen him before. What was that supposed to mean, anyway—'you’re mine'?
You’re almost too afraid to ask, unsure that you want his definition. 
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Once he’s parked, you both exit the car and head inside, and once the door is closed, you slump down into a chair.
He paces back and forth, hands on his hips, glancing up to you every few moments, your head in your hands, elbows atop your knees.
“Are you okay?” He asks gently, now a bit calmer.
You look up to him, your lower lip trembling. You choke out through tears, “No, I’m not okay! None of this is okay! What is wrong with you?”
He stops pacing. “I had to get the fuckin’ creep off of you-”
“So you almost kill him?”
He waves his hand. “He’ll be fine. Who even gives a shit?”
You shake your head in disbelief.
“What the fuck were you doing talking to him, anyway? You told me you were going to take a piss,  not hook up with some random-”
You stand then, temper having finally reached its boiling point. “Are you fucking kidding me? This again? You have treated me like garbage all day long! Looking at and flirting with girls and making me feel so worthless!” You begin to sob. “Do you have any idea the things I’ve been thinking? I…I never should’ve trusted you in the first place! I don’t know what I thought about you. Maybe that you could be different. Or that I could fix you or… God, I’m so fucking stupid. Just like my mother. But y’know what? I get it now. I get why she did it. She had no other choice. So, I might as well follow in her footsteps with that, too.”
You walk over to your bags, pulling your backpack onto your shoulders.
He panics. “W-what’re you doing?”
“I told you I’m done and I meant it. I’m leaving.” You grab your other bag. “I won’t waste years of my life on someone like she did. I have to get out before it’s too late.”
Just as you turn your back to him, taking a step toward the door, he breaks. What the fuck has he done? “Please don’t go. I’m in love with you.”
You halt. 
“Listen, I…I know I fucked up. Today…fuck, baby, I know. I just…last night…”
You slowly turn back to him. You’ve never heard him grasping for words before. Never seen him so unsure of himself. And what he’d just said… Love. 
He sighs, settling his hands back on his hips, looking down at the stained carpet beneath his boots. “I only realized it this morning. How I felt. I mean, I knew I felt it before. But I tried to play it off as anything but that. I didn’t want to acknowledge it—admit it. I mean, fuck, what if you didn’t feel the same? What if I got rejected?” He looks up to you. “I don’t know how to do any of this shit—being with someone, having feelings for them. Loving them, letting them love me. It’s not my style. Or wasn’t. Fuck, I don’t know. But I just…started seeing you differently the more we spent time together.
“And I guess I thought today…if I pushed you away, then the feelings might dissipate? I mean, look what happened the last time I loved—trusted—someone. She left.”
Your brow twitches. “And I don’t know that feeling?” You ask in anger.
He takes a step closer to you. “I know you do. I just-”
You cut him off. “Just stop, Billy.”
He shuts his mouth. 
You drop your bags, sitting back down again and thinking. You want to be understanding. But he's making showing kindness toward him incredibly difficult to do.
Finally, after a very long stretch of silence—him beginning to sweat, thinking you’re about to leave again—you speak. 
“I get pushing me away,” you say softly. “You said it before—that I had no friends back in Hawkins. And fear of abandonment was why. If I didn’t let anyone in, then they couldn’t walk away. But I’ve tried with you. Over and over again. And every time, you swung from one extreme to the other.”
You look at him. “You’ve given me whiplash you’ve done it so much. And today…” You trail off, a lump forming in your throat. “Do you have any idea what you put me through?” You ask in a whisper.
He pulls over a chair, sitting in front of you, taking your hands in his. “I put you through hell, I know.”
You shake your head, looking away from him. “You made me feel so…” Your chin wobbles. “I felt so alone. And for the first time I realized not a single person in the world wants or cares about me.” 
A tear slips down your cheek and then another one.
And he nearly does the same at him making you think that for even a second. He’d broken your heart.
You continue. “I thought a lot of horrible things today. Thought about throwing myself out of your car.”
His throat bobs.
“About going back home, not caring what happened to me—if he followed through on his promise. I decided at the movie that I was going to leave while you were asleep tonight, too afraid to do it while you were awake.” You look at him. “That’s what you’ve made me feel toward you: afraid.”
You look down to his bruised hand and pull your own away. 
“I don’t know how to trust you anymore. Last night I thought was…” You shake your head. “It doesn’t matter what I thought anymore. You’ll never change. I left Hawkins to get away from another man just like you. I would've been better off had I just done things on my own.”
You know you’re wasting your breath, so you stand again, grabbing your things.
Just as your hand settles over the door knob, he breaks down crying. “Please don’t leave. I’ll do fucking anything. Please, Y/N. I…I can’t lose you, too. Please, God, I’m begging you, stay.”
You go to turn the handle and then he comes over to you, falling on his knees beside you, pressing his face into your stomach, crying harder.
“I love you. Please. I’ll change, I’ll do whatever it takes. I’ll be whoever you need me to be. Just don’t walk out that door, I’m fuckin’ begging you.”
You sniffle, telling yourself over and over again not to cry. That he doesn’t mean it. It’s just another manipulation tactic, but you know this time is anything but. He’d never cry in front of you—anyone—unless the tears and the words leaving his lips were true.
“How can I trust you now?” You ask through gentle sobs.
He presses his cheek against your stomach then, hands gripping your soft hips. “Just let me prove to you that I can be better. The kind of man that’s worthy of you.”
He finally stands, cupping your face in his hands. “Angel, I know I don’t deserve you. Fuck, I probably never will. And I know you deserve a hell of a lot better than me. But you’re all I want. I’ve never wanted anything as badly as I want you. I…I need you. Just, what can I do to fix this?”
You turn your head, looking at the door and his heart begins to break. 
“If you want to leave, I won’t stop you. Just…” He steps away for a moment, reaching into his bag, and he pulls out a wad of cash and doesn’t stop counting until he’s reached a grand. “Take this,” he says, shoving it into your hand.
Your eyes go wide and you look up at him. 
“If you want the gun too-”
You shake your head. “Billy, I-” You sob, covering your mouth with the back of your other hand. You throw the money down on the table. "I don't want your money. I don't want anything from you. Not anymore."
He grabs your face again. "Just...let me ask you one thing. Please."
You blink up at him through teary eyes.
"Do you love me?" He asks, brushing stray tears away with the pads of his thumbs.
Your face crumples. "I wish I knew how to stop."
He lets loose a breath of relief. "Sweetheart, we had one bad day. A really shitty one, I know. But this is what I do when there's a risk of getting close to someone—I rail against it as hard as I can. And it always works—they walk away. Most of the time I'm the one who does. But I couldn't this time. Waiting for the other foot to finally fall, though, I was constantly on the edge of my goddamn seat waiting for it to finally happen.
"I thought... I thought it's what I wanted. I don't. I know that now. I want you. Now. Maybe...maybe forever. I guess we can figure that part out together. If you'll still have me. If you could ever fuckin' forgive me for all the shit I've done—put you through. It's not always going to be perfect. I'm going to piss you off and keep getting on your last nerve for my own amusement. I'll never stop being a pain in your ass. But it's only because I-" He sighs. "Because I love you. So, please, just stay. I think... I think that we belong together. Who the hell else is going to put up with me the way you have? Who else could ever understand the shit I've been through but someone else who's been through it, too?"
You stare up at him, sniffling, tears slipping from your tired eyes, your hands shaking at your sides, body slightly trembling. Every part of you is screaming at you to finally do it: run. Every part except your heart.
You know it might be the biggest mistake you've ever made, but it wouldn't be the first time.
You bury your face in his chest then, fisting the back of his shirt in your hands and you begin to wail, letting it all out. Everything. Your mom abandoning you in the middle of the night, your dad taking every ounce of anger and frustration out on you, your loneliness, your sadness, your hopelessness, your fear, the torment Billy has subjected you to.
You cry and cry until your legs give out, both of you sinking to the floor as he wraps his arms around you, holding you close.
He rests his cheek against the top of your head. "Never again," he promises, gently rocking you.
It takes every ounce of strength you have left to believe him.
579 notes · View notes
sunflower-lilac42 · 2 months
Text
𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹𝗼𝘄 | 𝘲𝘩43 ♔
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➪ summary: follow quinn and y/n through their journey of going from best friends to lovers
➪ warnings: reader has a shitty day, mentions of parents fighting, hate comments, that's all i think?
➪ word count: 5.1k
➪ file type: song based fic - reupload
➪ sunny's notes: i forgot how much this tugs at my heart. i'm sorry this took a little longer than i hoped it would but it's finally out again. i hope you guys enjoy it again - blog maintenance is happening tomorrow if i can get my computer to work :)
nhl masterlist || new taglist || navigation
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i'm like the water when your ship rolled in that night rough on the surface but you cut through like a knife 
˚₊· senior year of high school (2016-2017)
She was having a tough time, school, finals, graduation, work, everything and anything that she did seemed like it was ganging up on her. She couldn’t pinpoint the exact reason for her stress, but there were many things she could blame it on. On top of it, her parents had been fighting nonstop for the past month. It wasn’t like they hadn’t before but this time it was worse because she felt like she was the cause of it.
Quinn had invited her over for some dinner, hoping to at least relieve some of the stress from his best friend’s shoulders. When she arrived he could see the stress on her face, she looked as if she didn’t want to come in the first place. 
He stepped aside and let the girl in, “Hey, y/n/n.”
“Hey Quinner,” She gave him a tired smile. 
“You okay?” 
“Yeah, just tired.” She ran a hand through her hair before following Quinn to his room, saying hi to Ellen on the way. Ellen looked at the girl strangely, “Hi, y/n.”
“Hi, Mrs. Hughes.”
“How many times do I have to tell you to call me Ellen, hon.” She pressed a kiss to her head, “Are you okay? You look-”
Bad? Drained? Stressed? Annoyed? Tired? All of the above? Is what she wanted to say, but didn’t, “I’m just a little tired right now.” Ellen nodded but looked unconvinced, shooting her oldest a look who shook his head.
He lightly took the girl’s arm and took her to his room, offering her to sit on his bed which she took gratefully. She looked around his room and at the posters on his wall before looking over at where he now sat at his desk. He was already looking at her with a small smile on his face, concern still lingering in his eyes.
The two stared at each other for a moment before a knock was heard on the door, “Hi.”
The two looked over to see his brothers standing there, “Hi Jack, Luke.”
Quinn didn’t reciprocate his best friend’s kindness, “What do you two want?”
“We just wanted to give y/n this.” Luke pulled out one of his bear stuffed animals from behind his back, “You looked sad.” Jack stood there, slightly out of place, mostly because this was Luke’s idea instead of his, but he liked y/n enough to go with him.
“Awe, thanks, you guys.” Tears made their way to the corners of her eyes but she refused to let them fall in front of the two. 
Noticing her expression, Jack waved goodbye and dragged the eighth grader behind him. Y/n held the bear in her lap, arms wrapping around it tightly as she tried not to think of the events that happened before she got here. 
“Y/n/n? Are you sure you're okay, because if not-” Quinn’s overwhelming concern for her made the tears bubble over in her eyes and a sob ripped from her throat, “I can’t do it anymore, Quinny.” 
Quinn was quick to get up from his desk chair and stumble over to his bed to wrap the girl in a hug. He knew he didn’t have to do anything but hold her tight as she dug her head into his chest, the stuffed animal still clutched tightly to her chest. 
It took her about ten minutes to calm down, tear after tear, and for her it felt like it would never stop. Quinn did what he always did and waited for her to stop so he, or she, could talk about it. He knew if he tried to talk to her while she was crying, she wouldn’t listen, nothing got through to her when she was crying this hard. 
When she pulled away to wipe away her tear-stained face, Quinn opened his mouth to talk, “You know you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, but you can, I’ll always listen.” He reached his hand out to wipe away one tear that she missed, one blackened by her mascara, leaving a trail of the makeup it held behind it. 
She held a weak smile on her face at the warmth his hand brought to her cheek and looked at him, “Just finals and other shit like that, the usual. Plus, my parents were fighting again, I think that was my final straw.”
Quinn nodded his head, recognizing the tone in her voice that said she didn’t want to talk. Her face looked more tired after crying and he sighed, scooting back to rest his back against the headboard. Y/n looked at him confusedly but smiled when he opened his arms. She was quick to lay against his front, laying her head on his chest once more, still holding the bear in her grasp. 
Ellen walked by twenty minutes later to tell them that dinner was ready, but when she peaked into her son’s room and saw both of them with their eyes closed she smiled, closed the door, and walked away telling the rest of the family to be quiet as they slept. 
❛ ━━・❪ ❁ ❫ ・━━ ❜
and if it was an open-shut case i never would've known from that look on your face lost in your current like a priceless wine
˚₊· end of senior year/graduation (2017)
Both of them knew the feelings that they harbored for each other but were both unsure of how the other felt. Neither one of them wanted to mess up their current friendship, they had been best friends since freshman year. 
It had never been that simple between them, their friends saying how they looked like a couple everywhere they went. She would always wear his jerseys to his games or one of his shirts and he would always show up to her events with unwavering support. 
Whenever someone saw Quinn, y/n wasn’t too far behind and vice versa, whenever y/n was asked what she was doing that night, she would say hanging out with Quinn and vice versa. They would always be caught holding hands or leaning up against one another or literally any other way that looked like they were dating. 
They never said anything though, and they wouldn’t until graduation. Quinn and y/n stood side by side taking a picture with each other as they waited for their parents to find them. Y/n knew Quinn was good at hockey, good enough to get drafted, good enough to make the NHL, it was no secret. But because of Quinn’s birthday that wouldn’t happen for at least another year.
She was worried, she didn’t want to lose him. She didn’t want him to become this big-shot hockey player and forget about her, she didn’t want him to become a self-absorbed player with an ego bigger than himself. Though deep down she knew he would never let his ego get that big, but the forgetting part? As much as she told herself he wouldn’t and knew that he wouldn’t she couldn’t get past the ‘what if?’
Quinn waved a hand in front of her face, snapping a couple of times to gain her attention, “Y/n. Y/n. Y/n.” He dragged out the last syllable of her name. 
She looked at him, her eyes getting rid of the glassed-over look by blinking, “What?”
“I’ve been talking for the past couple of minutes and you, my dear sweet y/n, have not responded. You have just been-” Quinn looked over to where her focus had landed when she spaced out, “staring at that tree.”
“Oh sorry.”
“What’s on your mind?”
“What’s going to happen?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, we’re going to go to school for one year and then you’re going to get drafted. You’re going to go away somewhere and play professional hockey for a living and you’re going to forget about me.”
“Who said I was going to forget about you?”
“No one, just me and my thoughts.”
“Well, you and your thoughts are wrong, because I could never forget about you.” He tilted her head down to kiss the top of her head.
“That’s what you say now.”
“I’ll you fly out to wherever I’m playing, Nashville, Toronto, Vancouver, anywhere, and I’ll let you punch me if I forget about you because you are the best fucking thing that has ever happened to me. Since freshman orientation, I knew you were the one.”
“Are you just saying that because I was the only one who would talk about hockey with you?”
Quinn, being bold, slid his hands underneath y/n’s graduation gown, grabbing onto her waist through the fabric of her dress and pulling her close to him. She stumbled at the unexpected action, causing the boy to apologize before placing his index finger underneath her chin and lifting it so her eyes would meet his, “Look at me.”
She sighed when the two made contact. Quinn noticed the fear in her eyes, she truly didn’t want to lose him and he didn’t either, “I know you’re worried and so am I, but I promise you this-”
She didn’t want to hear what he had to say, the whole bullshit of the promises not to forget about her, she’s read it plenty of times in books, “Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Quinn.” She averted her eyes away again, directing them to the other families around them.
“Hey.” Quinn once again moved her head so her eyes had no choice but to look into his own, “I love you.”
“I love you too, Quinn but that doesn’t really change-”
“Just shut up for one minute, will you? I love you, y/n. And I don’t mean the typical I love you that you give to the girls. I love you and I was too afraid to tell you because I didn’t want to ruin our friendship and I didn’t know how you felt but I thought if there was a time to tell you this, it would be now.”
Y/n looked at him in shock, the words she had been waiting for since she walked into the auditorium for orientation. This wasn’t real life, was it?
Quinn stared at her blank face as she opened and closed her mount a couple of times, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything.”
The boy went to walk away but she placed a hand on his arm, “No! No, I’m sorry I just didn’t know what to say. I love you too, Quinn.”
“You do?”
She nodded and Quinn wasted no time placing his lips onto hers.
❛ ━━・❪ ❁ ❫ ・━━ ❜
life was a willow and it bent right to your wind head on the pillow, i could feel you sneaking in
˚₊· fall of 2021
She loved Quinn, she truly did, but not that much that she was willing to stay up into the early hours of the morning/late hours of the night for him after a game. She texted him saying that she was going to bed and that she was proud of him for his game. 
It was the first time since they moved in together that Quinn had a night home game. Getting used to the rhythm that was going to be for the rest of Quinn’s hockey career was starting slow. She wasn’t used to him coming home at late hours of the night or leaving in the early hours of the morning before the sun was up to go to practice. 
She didn’t mind it that much though, just knowing that he was coming home to her was good enough for the both of them. She laid in bed, hoping that she would be able to stay awake until he got home but she fell asleep within moments of her placing her ends down on the pillow.
When Quinn got the text, he had just finished putting on his suit jacket and he wanted nothing more than to go home to his girl and lay next to her in their newly shared bed. But, his teammates were not going to let that happen. 
They dragged him to a bar to have one or two drinks before heading home. He thinks he’s never detested his teammates this much before this moment. When he finished his first drink, he said goodbye, practically running out of the doors of the bar. 
He unlocked the car and practically sped home and crept into the apartment, just in case y/n was already sleeping. He set his things down and walked into the bedroom and smiled when he saw her curled up in the sheets, a shirt of his adorning her body much like in college when he’d go to away games. 
He took a quick shower, not wanting to prolong the duration of not having her in his arms. He put a pair of sweatpants on before carefully lifting the covers and sliding into bed. Y/n, who had been awake since he walked in the apartment doors, turned over, “Hey Quinner.”
Quinn’s eyes snapped to his girlfriend’s, “Hi sweetheart. I’m sorry, did I wake you?” 
“No, I was just a little cold and then I heard the front door click open.”
“Why didn’t you tell me you were awake?”
“Because then I would’ve had to wait even longer for you to come to bed.”
Quinn smiled, kissing her, “I love you.”
“I love you.”
❛ ━━・❪ ❁ ❫ ・━━ ❜
life was a willow and it bent right to your wind they count me out time and time again
˚₊· 2022
𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪 『 instagram 』
_quinnhughes
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liked by yourusername, jackhughes, lhughes_06, and 58,527 others
_quinnhughes happy fifth anniversary to this gorgeous girl. and while we both know that five should really be a nine, i'm glad i've been able to call you mine for the five of them. i love you, y/n <3
tagged: yourusername
view 309 comments
yourusername: quinn... i love you so much 💙
⤷ _quinnhughes: i love you too pretty girl 💚
⤷ user: the canucks colors 🥹
jackhughes: proud of you for putting up with him for so many years @/yourusername
⤷ yourusername: my pleasure
lhughes_06: congrats you two!
*liked by _quinnhughes & yourusername*
user: five years? hah, that's humorus
user: can't believe she's kept him for that long, thought quinn would've dumped her when he made the nhl
user: she's not even that pretty, i don't see the appeal
user: probably just using him
user: don't see this lasting any longer
_eliaspetterson: congrats guys! happy five years
*liked by yourusername & _quinnhughes*
bboeser: my besties!
⤷ _quinnhughes: please do not ever use that word again
⤷ yourusername: i think it's sweet, quintin
❛ ━━・❪ ❁ ❫ ・━━ ❜
life was a willow and it bent right to your wind but i come back stronger than a 90's trend 
˚₊· 2022
𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪 『 instagram 』
nhlwags
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liked by yourusername, _quinnhughes, canucks, and 8,432 others
nhlwags as we ring in the holiday season, y/n is back with her famous gift bags! we heard cookies were the hit thing this year.
also wishing these two a (very) belated fifth anniversary, hope quinn and y/n have many more years to come (maybe a ring soon 👀)
tagged: yourusername, _quinnhughes, canucks
view 98 comments
yourusername: my favorite time of year! always glad when i get to make the team things. (and yes, i'm hoping for a ring too 😔)
⤷ user: if you don't get a ring, it's rigged. wya @/_quinnhughes??
⤷ yourusername: fr
_eliaspetterson: cookies were amazing as always, treating us well over here
bboeser: our little baker!
jackhughes: this is preposterous! we never got any cookies :(
⤷ yourusername: you know what that word means?
⤷ jackhughes: when did you start becoming a bully to me
⤷ yourusername: when i started hanging out with you too much
user: gagged them fr
user: well... she shut them up
user: me looking for all the hate comments to defend my girl
user: i really wanna know what the famous y/n cookies taste like
⤷ j.tmiller9 heaven
⤷ colemcward: the greatest thing on this planet
⤷ conor.garland8: amazing
⤷ jackhughes: perfect
⤷ lhughes_06: everything you would want them to taste like
⤷ _quinnhughes: i'm starting to get the sense you guys only come to my house to taste her food
❛ ━━・❪ ❁ ❫ ・━━ ❜
wait for the signal and I'll meet you after dark show me the places where the others gave you scars
˚₊· summer of ‘19
“Meet me at the dock after everyone goes to bed” was the text y/n got at ten o’clock. She smiled to herself when she read it and patiently waited for everyone to go to bed before sneaking out of the house and running down to the dock. Quinn sat with his feet dangling over the wood into the water waiting for his girlfriend. When he heard footsteps behind him, he turned around and grinned when he saw her running towards him. 
They hadn’t had a moment alone together in almost three months. When Quinn had to fly to Vancouver to make his debut, she couldn’t come with him, having to finish her classes. Then she was staying with her parents for the majority of May and into June and she wasn’t allowed to go anywhere. Quinn had been finishing up some things with the team and he ended up spending some much-needed time with his family. 
Ever since y/n had gotten to the lake house, she had been helping Ellen with things and spending time with Luke and Jack because they wanted her to. They played Mario Kart and other video games, and the two made her go out on the boat with them and made her watch as they did tricks and flipped into the water. 
Quinn patted the space next to him but instead, y/n took her spot right on his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck. His eyes widened at the sudden contact but happily wrapped his arms around her waist, snuggling into one another. 
Y/n looked at him, “So, I guess I’m dating a big-shot NHL player now, huh?”
Quinn merely shrugged, “I guess you are, aren’t you?”
“Yes, unfortunately, because he’s living in a totally different country than me and in the opposite direction.”
“Aw, that sucks. I’m sorry to hear that. He must feel terrible.”
“Oh I don’t know, he gets to be a free man.”
“I wouldn’t say free, more sad.”
That comment made her perk up, “What’s wrong?”
“I just, miss you.” His voice ever so slightly cracked and she could see the tears starting to form in his eyes, “Honey. Hey, hey, it’s okay.”
At the nickname, Quinn immediately started crying,  he had missed her so much, much more than he ever imagined he would. He never really thought about the fact that his best friend, his girlfriend, his everything would be in Michigan while he was in Vancouver. 
“No, it’s not okay. I get to live out my dream but my dream isn’t complete without you there. We’re going to be 2,368.82 miles apart for at least the next two years. I don’t think I can do it.”
Y/n hated it when he cried, it broke her heart into a million pieces when she saw the tears trickling down his face. Much like he always did with her, she reached up and cupped his face, wiping his tears off his face, “Listen to me. We are Quinn and y/n, y/n and Quinn, when has anything ever stopped us from being apart? Where's Quinn from when we graduated, huh? The Quinn who promised me that he would never forget me and that everything was going to be okay? Just because we’re however many miles you said apart doesn’t mean anything. So now it’s my turn to promise you something. I promise you that we are going to find a way to make this work.”
Quinn nodded his head, still a little unconvinced about her words. In a way to distract him from the thoughts that he never thought he would be able to escape, she looked at the scars on his body and started asking him questions about them. 
Some were from his childhood when he, Jack, and Luke would be playing a game or messing around and one of them would throw something at him or he was pushed over. Some were from when he played hockey when he was younger, getting shoved into the boards or shoving someone else into the boards. Some were from the games he played in the spring, his first games in the NHL. Those were y/n’s favorites and least favorites. Favorites because it was from his dream, and the stories behind them would last forever, least favorites because they reminded her of how much he could get hurt doing this. But that wasn’t something she wanted to worry about right now. 
All she wanted to do was think about this moment, the moment they were living in as the stars illuminated where they sat on the dock, in each other’s arms, talking about random stories from each other’s childhood. 
❛ ━━・❪ ❁ ❫ ・━━ ❜
now this is an open-shut case guess i should've known from the look on your face every bait and switch was a work of art
˚₊· fall/winter of 2023
“You guys would never guess what I found when I was cleaning the other day.” Y/n came walking in from the room she had been in. 
Jack and Luke sat at the table with Quinn and Ellen and Jim sat near their sons, one of the days leading up to the Hughes v Hughes game. They all smiled as the girl came bounding in, Quinn had just placed down his tiles when she spoke and he raised his eyebrows, “What’d you find, hon?”
Y/n placed a fluffy object down on the wood surface, “Luke’s bear that he and Jack gave me when we were in high school.”
“Paulie?” 
“You still remember its name?” Jack laughed loudly and Ellen got up to hit the middle child on the back of his head, “Don’t make fun of you brother.”
“Oh, come on. You have to admit, it's a little funny.”
Luke blushed heavily and Quinn quirked an eyebrow, “Why do you still have that is my question.” He took the bear into his grasp and started fiddling with its arms, “Because.”
She shrugged and all five of the Hughes’ looked intrigued, “Y/n, you have to tell us.” Jack insisted as he leaned forward, messing up the game that had previously been going on. Quinn and Luke groaned at their brother’s actions. 
“Because,” She ripped the bear from her boyfriend’s grasp and held it to her chest, “Because it reminds me of that day when I was sad and you guys cheered me up. It was the first day I felt a part of the family.”
“I remember that day.” Luke spoke up, looking between everyone in the room, “Jack and I were sitting on the couch when Quinn opened the door for you and you came in and you looked all…”
“Dead?”
“I was gonna say sad but I guess that works too. Anyway, when you two went up I told Jack my plan and he hesitated about it but I knew he had a soft spot for you so he caved in easily. I ran to my room to get the bear and give it to you.”
“It was a stupid, plan.” Jack laughed again but he knew how much it meant to y/n. 
The girl shrugged and hugged Luke from behind, resting her arms on his shoulders as they wrapped around him, clasping her hands together, “It’s okay, Luke. I loved it.”
Ellen smiled, “And following, you’ve always been a part of the family. Ever since Quinn came back from freshman orientation just bragging about the girl he met.”
“Mom.” Quinn threw his head back in annoyance and y/n giggled, “You talked to your mom about me? From freshman orientation? Ew, I was just a dork back then.”
“If I remember correctly, Quinn couldn’t stop talking about the girl that wore a Patrick Sharp Blackhawks jersey one or two sizes too big, with her hair in braids who talked about hockey with him for the duration of orientation.” Jim patted his son on his shoulder as Quinn continued to clench his eyes in embarrassment. 
“Do we really have to relive this moment?”
“Maybe not now but Ellen and I are definitely going to talk about this when you aren’t around.”
“Hey look at that, she called me Ellen! It only took her ten years.” The woman teased as she wrapped her in a hug. 
“Hey! I thought I was being respectful, and it’s a force of habit.” Y/n blushed as she smiled and gasped when all of a sudden an armed wrap around her and Quinn pulled her into his lap.
“Quinn!” Quinn hid his face in the crook of her neck and breathed deeply, “I’m never going to live this down. 
“Probably not.” Looking at her watch, y/n realized the time, placing a kiss on Quinn’s forehead. 
“I should be going to bed, I got work in the morning. Night everyone!”
The four let out their goodnights and Quinn whispered an ‘I love you’ and y/n repeated the words to him before heading into their shared bedroom. The five Hughes’ sat in the kitchen for a couple of minutes in silence until Jack spoke, “So, when are you going to ask her?”
❛ ━━・❪ ❁ ❫ ・━━ ❜
the more that you say the less i know
˚₊· freshman year of college (2017-2018)
Sitting at one of the tables in the student center, y/n sat across from Quinn as he talked about whatever was going on in the hockey world. She understood hockey, enough to be able to watch the game when it was happening and she knew some of the stats, but anything past that, not a clue in the world. 
She loved it when Quinn talked about hockey though. His eyes lit up and held this glint in them, he talked really fast, just spewing out nonsense. It was the highlight of her day when it happened, it was at least once a day if not more. He would always show up outside her dorm room or offer to take her to dinner. 
Every time he did, it always took Quinn a while to notice that his girlfriend wasn’t responding and this was the same. Quinn was rambling about Ohio State’s hockey team and the upcoming game against them and she just sat there, amused by his voice and his facial expressions. 
Quinn was halfway through his ramble when he finally made eye contact with her, “You’re not paying any attention to this are you?”
“I’m sorry, babe, but it’s really hard to when you look like that when you talk.”
“Look like what? An idiot for not knowing my girlfriend is not listening to any word I say?”
“No, hot.” Quinn’s cheeks reddened as he looked at her, “You never fail to make me blush do you”
“Absolutely not, and anyway, you know I never understand hockey. I try but it’s all in one ear and out the other.”
“I think one time we need to set up something so you can learn everything you need to know. Get you a book or make you a slide show or something.”
“Sure, Quinny. Whatever you say.”
❛ ━━・❪ ❁ ❫ ・━━ ❜
wherever you stray i follow
˚₊· september of 2021
“You can just put that box over there.”
Jack placed down the box where y/n said, “How much stuff do you have?”
“Wow, Jack. Can’t believe you’d be so mean to me. This is why Luke is my favorite.” Y/n placed her arm around Luke as he walked into the apartment, “What?”
“Nothing, you poor innocent little man.” Y/n walked away to start unpacking the box Jack had placed down not too long ago.
“Do you guys need any help?” Luke asked politely, following after his brother’s girlfriend. 
“Nah, I’m okay. Thanks you guys, just chill out for a little bit before we go out for dinner.” The two nodded, sitting on Quinn’s, and now y/n’s, couch.
Just at that moment, Ellen walked in from the hallway and Quinn followed her, “It would be nice of you two to actually help y/n instead of just sitting there.”
Jack threw his arms up, “We offered to help her and she said no!”
“Actually, I offered but yes, she said it was okay.”
Y/n nodded her head, “I did.”
『••✎••』
Later that night, y/n and Quinn were standing in the living room, looking out the window. Quinn was standing behind the girl with his arms wrapped around her waist, “I can’t believe this is real.”
“I know, the lights are beautiful.”
“Not that.”
“Then what?” She looked up at him to see a lovesick expression on his face. 
“You here, in Vancouver.”
“Hey, you didn’t want me to be here in the first place.”
“Yeah well, I wanted you to do what was best for you. I didn’t want you to move all the way out here just because I was here.”
“How dumb are you?”
“Very, apparently.” 
She smiled again and rocked the two of them side to side, “Whatcha wanna do?”
Quinn just winked at her eliciting a giggle from her.
❛ ━━・❪ ❁ ❫ ・━━ ❜
i'm begging for you to take my hand wreck my plans that's my man
˚₊· july/august of 2021 + november 7, 2021
“Quinn please!”
“Y/n, I’m not letting you do this. You had it all planned out since the moment we both got our acceptance letters.”
“I know that Quinn, but things change, plans change. I want to be with you, forever. I want to be wherever you are, please just let me come to Vancouver with you.”
The two stared at each other, eyes locked. They had been arguing for the past hour, ever since y/n brought it up. She had just graduated college and with Quinn having been in the NHL for the past two years she got a taste of what it would be like to do long distance, and it was horrible for both of them. 
“You know what it's like. These past two years have been horrible, Quinn, and not just for me and you know it.” Her voice cracked, “I would rather wreck everything I have planned for my future just to move to Vancouver for you. I can find a job there.”
“Are you sure, like 100% sure about this?” Y/n placed her hands on his cheeks, “Of course, I’m sure.”
Quinn nodded his head, “When do you want to move in?”
『••✎••』
It was November when y/n was able to go to Quinn’s first home game. It was a Sunday and they were playing the Stars. She was extremely excited as she threw on her jersey and drove to Rogers Arena. She met up with some of the wags that were going to the game as well and they sat in the suite waiting for their husbands to start playing. 
When they all came out, they cheered in unison watching them skate. They conversed slightly, giving y/n teasing comments and glances every time the announcers would mention Quinn or he had done something even remotely good for the team. It was worse when he got sent to the penalty box for cross-checking in the first period.
Most of them gave her cheeky grins when they showed him in the box, some giving her nudges. She blushed deeply as they made their comments. She didn’t know what was up with him tonight, he got three primary assists and a penalty. 
After the game, the wags excitedly took the girl down to the tunnel to wait for Quinn, “Hey, there’s your man.”
Y/n looked up and smiled, “That is my man.” 
Quinn smiled brightly, picking the girl up and spinning her around, “I can’t believe you’re here! You’re actually here!”
“Alrighty, Quinny, calm down. You’re causing a scene.”
“Sorry, babe. I’m just really excited that you’re here.” He smiled down at her, his hands on her lower biceps, just above her elbow, “I can tell.”
“What do you say, you guys want to go out for dinner?”
“Quinn, I got work in the morning. I need some sleep. Maybe another time though?” The girls nodded their heads at y/n and let the young couple wander off out of the arena and to their car.
“I’m really glad you’re here. I don’t know if I would’ve survived another minute without knowing you weren’t waiting at home for me.”
“Well, you never have to survive another minute without me again. Unless you’re on a road trip then, yes, but you know what I mean.”
Quinn and y/n were so in love it was actually kind of annoying to some people, but they had to admit that they were absolutely adorable.
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⬂ 𝗩𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗼𝘂𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗖𝗮𝗻𝘂𝗰𝗸𝘀 𝗧𝗮𝗴𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 ⬂
please message me if you weren't tagged! | reminder to add yourself to the new taglist if you haven't already! this will be the last post with the vancouver taglist
@shoesjr13 | @if-my-heart-bleeds | @pucks-goals-penalties | @elegieseulogise | @crazycat-ladys-blog | @5secondsofonedirection222 | @piavettel33 | @mikayladavis | @klkennedy | @hockeyboysarehot | @dasiysthings | @rleigh-47 | @itsnotgray | @dyslecticdutchman | @thescooby-gang | @hischier-papaya | @toasttt11 | @fratboyharrysgf0201 | @kei943 | @zebraszegras | @eleutherafairy | @hockeygirl101 | @fearfam69691 | @skoolnites
@bunting58 | @rhino-saurus | @fallinallincurls | @valluvsu | @cixrosie | @love4lando | @lausdigitaldiary | @livelovefanfics | @love-like-woaah | @ayap4paya | @voidvannie | @leighigh | @devilsandpensfan | @marriedtobedsy | @books-hlmc | @urmomsleftballsack86 | @shawnshoney | @bunbunbl0gs | @quinnylouhughesx43 | @ru-kru | @alwaysclassyeagle | @flowergirl1134
@puckslxt | @ivy-34 | @petite-potato4
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decayical · 8 months
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✦ ── SOFTLY, SWEETLY !
❝ blade loves you, he will never stop loving you . ❞
01 notes: i literally have nothing to put here like ever ... this was my first time writing soft dom im pretty sure i hope it's ok 🙏🙏
02 tags: praise kink, dumbification, unintentional edging, a bit angsty a but fluffy if you squint, creampie, afab/gn reader, puppy/sweetheart/baby used as pet names, blade is called bladie :3
03 mdni blogs do not interact! a minor wrote this. word count 848
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“so pretty, so pretty, so pretty, so pretty, fuck—so pretty, just for me.”
blade let out a soft whimper as he continued to thrust gently into you, his tongue slightly lolling out of his mouth as he stared into space. he probably didn't even realize how tangled up he and you were in the blankets, because all on his mind was you, you, you. your pretty face, your flushed cheeks, your soft thighs and the oh-so-heavenly way you squeezed around his fat cock.
though, to be fair, it's not like you were much better—despite blade's slow movements, the drag of his cock along your walls was enough to fuck you dumb, making your head fuzzy in the best way possible. you had been teetering on the edge of a climax for so long you became much more sensitive than usual, and even though you desperately wanted to cum you still love, love, loved the feeling—being beneath him, completely at his mercy.
blade tilted his head down to connect your tongue to his, the sloppy kiss being the only thing to ground you as he let out a pretty little moan, snapping his hips into yours just once, but it was enough to make you squeal and writhe around under his hold. in that moment, he was so deep inside of you that his tip was probably kissing your cervix from how full you felt, the unfamiliar sensation quickly becoming too much as you arched your back, trying to make sense of the situation.
blade cursed internally, shushing you and pressing comforting kisses all over your exposed neck to distract yourself from the sudden pain. “i’m sorry, i’m sorry, my love…” he continued to whisper to you, resuming his slow, sensual movements as he started to rub your clit with a calloused thumb.
you squealed again, your back arching as tears pricked the corner of your eyes and you reached out to tug at his hair. “blade, blade, ‘s too big! too much, hurts, fuck, more, so—ah—so full…”
blade let out a soft chuckle, his thumb doused in your arousal moving up to caress your cheek. “you're not making any sense, puppy. is it too much or not?” he asked teasingly, licking your jaw. “like that, yeah? right here?” his thrusts suddenly got more aggressive again, but not like he was trying to stab you with his dick—they were sharp, the thrusts inward so fast you could barely process what was happening, but he'd drag his cock out of your slick walls so painfully slow a frustrated moan left your mouth.
“blaaaade,” you whined, toes curling as your legs wrapped around his waist, “love you…”
blade’s chest panged with a sort of emotion he was unfamiliar with, yet somehow the sensation felt nostalgic to him at the same time. “oh, baby,” he cooed, tucking a strand of hair away from your face, “i love you too. taking me so well, hmm? ‘s just like you were made for this dick.”
his musings made your heart flutter as your cheeks burned up, you nodded vigorously in agreement as he moved his hands to pin your wrists above your head. “mm, yeah made f’ you, made just f’ you, bladie.”
you let out this bright smile that always seemed to make blade's day, and you nuzzled the forearm and hand that was close to your head. you peppered kisses all over his scarred wrists, feeling his hands twitch and tighten over your own.
“fuck, i—i love you.” blade's head swam, the coil in his stomach tightening as he let out another shy moan. “gonna let me cum inside you, pretty? gonna let me make you all mine?”
you whined, wiggling your hips to get more friction. “c–close,” was the only thing you managed to say, but to blade it was good enough.
“we cum together,” he mumbles, hand gently grazing your jaw as he kisses you softly, deliciously. he never once changed his pace, always keeping it slow, soft, firm, but it was still enough to have his thighs twitching and your walls fluttering around him, the comfort in each other more than enough.
you came first, letting out a high-pitched squeal as you tightened around him and your fluids covered the base of his dick. blade's eyes fell closed, he muttered “fuck”, before thrusting into you just once more before he let you milk his cock. he kept on moving, trying to prolong both of your orgasms, shaky breaths leaving his chest and he whined. his release filled you to the brim and then started to spill out, truly a mesmerizing sight.
his hands let go of yours and shyly, you reached for his neck, delving into a kiss. his tongue glided over yours, tasting everything you had to offer. “so good for me,” he whispered, trailing your jaw with his fingers.
“fuck… again, bladie,” you whined, moving to rile him up. “‘gain, please? wan’ your cock.”
blade huffed. “you have that, sweetheart.” he grabbed your jaw to make you look directly into his eyes. “you have that and more.”
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killzenin · 11 months
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⤷COME ON FUCK ME EMO BOY.ᐟ where you can't control yourself while choso is playing the bass
★W0RD C0UNT: 588★
۫ ⋆ ࣪.+18 content, smut, afab!reader, whiney/pathetic choso, dry humping, oral f!recieving, choso has tongue piercing ۫ ִ ۫ ⁎ .
m.list n' b4 u request
a/n: something took over me 😰
support the blog/me by reblogging !
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you really did not marvel yourself over instruments at all. nor did you care to learn any. too much work that you were not willing to put yourself through. nevertheless, that changed once you met choso.
the way his slender yet calloused fingers, due to years of playing, fret and stroked along the bass strings. creating that deep, reverberating sound that buzzed through the body and complimented the melodies of other instruments perfectly. you gawked each and every time you were there to keep company while he practiced.
though something today just made it feel extra attractive. maybe it was the wife-beater he had on and how the metallic balls from his nip piercings bugled against the fabric. maybe it was the melodies he was playing. maybe it was the way he his legs fell apart on the couch while playing bass. or the strands of his jet-black hair scattered across his forehead. maybe it was the way he slurped and played with the watermelon lollipop on his mouth.
either way, your desires pushed your legs from the inner home entrance of the garage and plop yourself next to your boyfriend.
the corners of choso's mouth crept upwards softly as he felt the couch sink next to him and your warm presence taking over his side. he did not stop his practice, making you pout at the lack of attention.
so you decided to take it gradually. playing with his soft hair until you coaxed him enough to straddle him. your hips moving in slow, tantalizing circled against his growing bulge.
low shudders escaped from his sweet lips, forgetting his instrument due to the arising pleasure. "you've been playing all morning, cutie. you should take a break, don't you think?"
choso's hands held on to the flesh of your waist, pressing down to feel your cunt spasm around him.
"you're right, pretty girl," choso snatched your body so that you would rest your weight on the couch. his inked covered body running down, taking out his lollipop while kissing every limb he encountered until he arrived at his final destination.
"let me get a taste of my pretty cunt, hmm?" this was the thing with choso. he loved playing the bass, but he adored having his face stuffed between your legs and would find the perfect excuse just to situate himself where he belongs.
you took the candy out of his hand and placed it in your own mouth, savoring the sweetness. choso whimpers and whines resonated as you took your pants off. finally taking your underwear by his own hands, he found shelter lapping and slurping without mercy at your pussy.
the metal ball that adorned choso's tongue teased around your clit, tapping it as his lips sucked it to his hearts content. his moans added to your growing pleasure. as it vibrated on your cunt, it was also music to your ears, how desperate he was.
"do not think of touching yourself." you say, holding on to his raven locks as a means to further down his mouth. choso, being the compliant little boyfriend that he was, never once left his hands from your plush thighs. he kept going as usual, penetrating your cunt with his tongue from time to time. letting your orgasms smear and accumulate on his mouth and cumming untouched, leaving a wet stain on his cargo's.
but he wouldn't worry too much, since you would help him clean up his mess with your mouth soon after. truly a good after practice rest.
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goteique · 5 months
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 ❝ ATLEAST WE SEE THE SAME MOON ❞ + ( sakusa kiyoomi, hinata shoyo, atsumu miya, bokuto koutaro,meian shūgo ) 
cw. | headcanon/scenarios about how they act while being away from you vs how they act when they actually get to see you; gn-reader, boyfriend headcanons, first-time long-distance relationships, fluff, brief mentions of smut, established relationship. || redirect to blog navigation.
notes. | recently rewatched hq so here's something to get rid of my nostalgic brain rot.
☆ SAKUSA KIYOOMI
Sakusa Kiyoomi is a man of less talk and more work most of the time. He is the kind to miss you day and night without diluting his efficiency in the game. Even texting seems hard for him a phone call seems a little too demanding. He will call you when he is at the far end of a high cliff yet not tell you how much he misses you, your voice, your touch around the house. . . everything in general. But after calling for onetime it starts to become frequent and his talk is full of: "Did you miss me?", " Do you even miss me?", " you rarely call me"; even though he is the one who has told you not to call when you feel like it yet he is the one to call you to say that he misses you a lot and most of the time it is out of context. Maybe you are talking about your day, or some local news but when you finish he just spurts "I miss you". There are two seconds of silence then he says again, "I miss you a lot." But when he is finally home, with you on the same bed and inside you, he would still say, "Did you miss me?" and then places open mouth kisses all over your body saying, " because I sure missed you a lot."
★HINATA SHOYO 
 Hinata is used to being away from his favorite people but he is not used to being away from you. His texts are frequent and regularly calls you to check on you but when he misses you he never tells instead he visits famous tourist spots and video calls you, shows you those famous tourist spots through video call and says, "i wish we could see this together," and then goes on autopilot mode of talking. You ask him to repeat what he just said and he does repeat except what you want to hear. It is a pulling-pushing game and the end results are embarrassment, laughter, and confession. He never gives a room to complain but time and place keep you apart from him. He often sends you parcels containing matching pieces of jewellery and outfits. And after such deliveries, he visits you and brings souvenier for everyone, even for you but says, "Don't worry this is not the only thing i came for to give you." So, when everyone is sleeping in the house and you two are awake and barely clad. He says, "I've more souvenirs for you," as he admires the bite marks over your body while hooking his arms around your thighs, getting ready for the next step.
 ✮ ATSUMU MIYA
Atsumu's way of telling you that he misses you is not very stealthy but if you tease too much, his verbal expression comes to a halt since he will build a cocoon around him. Sure, he wears his heart of his sleeve, sometimes on his face but he is never the one to be good with teasing especially coming from his beloved. So, he regularly sends you gifts with an endearing note and when he finally comes home unannounced, he is found in the bedroom with a box full of all those notes he send you, crying. He is crying for two reasons. one: his surprise did not go as he planned. two: he is missing you right now more than ever. When you finally come home, both of you get surprised at first and then he goes back to his whining self about how he wanted to surprise you, talking about his matches and food. Talking about food is a must because he will never admit how good Ongiri MIya is and as he keeps talking he follows you everywhere you go, every corner of the house, and gives you the puppiest face he can manage if you do not let him inside the shower with you. But you actually do, because the owner did miss this puppy.
★ BOKUTO KOUTARO 
 Bokuto makes time for you every day. He is the kind who tells you each and every detail of his each day before going to bed when he misses you. He tells you that he is coming over next weekend to see you and gets pouty when you are not surprised. It is not a wonder to you that it totally slipped his mind that he actually did mention that he is coming to see you but when you mention that you have specifically taken a day off since he was coming he is instantly is in his high spirits. Because he gets to spend time with you, He gets to spend each and every moment with you,he gets to go out with you, he gets to binge-watch shows with you. There are so many things he get to do wuth you just because he told you that he is coming to see you beforehand. isn't that great? Well, of course it is. As much as he is excited to do all these things, he ends up doing nothing instead spending the whole day in bed with you: talking and listening, talking and touching, touching and kissing, kissing and fucking and then fucking and talking again. If you say that you have to cook he says, "can't we order a take out today?" just so he could cuddle you just fiften minutes more.
 ☆MEIAN SHŪGO
 Meian has a reserved time for you, during weekends unless a match comes up. Everyone knows that even team-mates, parents and coach. He asks you to keep the video call on and do whatever you are doing. It is a nice feeling, almost having him like he is with you, around you even if it is through those rectangular screens. But late at night, he gets a little too sneaky and demanding asking what you are wearing? or says that there's something on your shoulder even if there is not. He takes the longest detour to tell you that he misses you. But all of that just sublimes when you say that you are going to shower. He keeps quiet for a moment and ends uo saying the most common reaction,"without me?" There are times when the answer is yes with a huge nod from your end but there are also times, when you say, "No. You can watch." But Meian does not survive your whole shower time. He even ends the video call just before you are fully naked yet deep down in his heart he believes he can improve with time.
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thegnomelord · 5 months
Note
if you write a thing about the creaming the zussy i will kiss ur boots
The boots better be shining when you're done.
How To Cure Zombies 101
CW:NSFW MDNI, crackfic obv PiV sex, TLOU Clicker trans Ghost, Top Male Reader, established relationship, happy ending, dub-con because Simon consented before he got bit but reader is apprehensive, zombie sex (does it count as necro?) how does this work? idk porn logic. Don't ask me how this happened, i hope this doesn't become what my blog becomes known for.
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When the Cordyceps spread across the planet and turned millions of people into shambling mushroom infested undead, the world ended.
When Simon got bitten. . . your world ended.
You still remember it like it had been yesterday; He came back bloody, an empty look in his eyes as he showed you the bite on his arm. Your hands shook as he wrapped them around the grip of the gun and aimed it at his head. You both ended up on the floor with you crying into his chest, unable to pull the trigger.
You remember the resigned look in his eyes when he had agreed to let you do whatever you needed to him to cure him, but both of you knew there was no way, what made you immune to the fungus was as mysterious to the rest of the world as it was for you. His lips had been burning hot when he laid a soft kiss on your forehead, the last sense of warmth you've felt since the docs took him to where they kept the infected for study, your heart leaving with him.
And now?
Now the scientists that have been prodding you like a lab rat since Simon got bitten nearly a year ago say they have a way to bring his mind back, to get Simon back.
And the way to do it?
"So let me get this straight?" You begin, your voice tense, your body even tenser. "You want me to fuck the corpse of my lover? And that will cure him?"
That. You're not sure how the eggheads arrived to this conclusion, frankly all of their scientific jargons had flown over your head. All you understood was that the man you had fallen since the first time you met him could be brought back.
You sincerely hope you won't make some type of super fungus through this.
Words can't describe what you feel as you look at Simon's (is it even Simon?) bound body writhing on the gyno chair, naked and bare to you. You doubt you even know what you feel, hope and fear simultaneously curling in your stomach— You hadn't had the courage to look at him ever since the scientists took him away; The harsh laboratory lights make it easy to see the mycelium filling his veins beneath the ashy pale skin, mushroom caps growing beneath his pecs and across all other scars he has. Red and yellow mushrooms have eaten away his nose and spread out to follow the contours of his face, growing in a way that makes the mushroom caps blend together into a skull shape.
Your heart aches when you see his eyes haven't been eaten away yet, the once deep brown turned milky white and staring lifelessly past you, thrashing about in the bindings, rotten teeth gnawing on the ball gag in his mouth, small hisses and malformed muffled clicks echoing through the room.
You try to look down and you stop at his stomach, forcing yourself to breathe in and out slowly because your heart is beating so fast it feels like you'll have a panic attack. You have no idea if this will work and doing this to Simon only to find out it's as useless as all your previous attempts to cure him. . . you're sure it would break you. Closing your eyes and counting to ten you will yourself to focus, your eyes opening slowly and following the trail of little mushroom caps down to his groin.
It's not what you expected., but it's. . . a lot; Mushroom caps have replaced the lips of his cunt, similar to the hard growths on his head but these look thinner and longer, almost like flower petals framing his cunt, bright red at the corners and getting progressively lighter as it nears his hole. A sort of morbid curiosity compels you to reach out brushing your fingertips against the caps. They're surprisingly softer than you had expected, smooth and slick with some kind of slime. You can't help but notice how a longer stalked mushroom grows from what had been his clit.
You jerk your hand back when a second brush of your fingers makes his body to jerk back and attempt to fight against the restraints, more angry clicks vibrating his throat.
But you also notice a kind of… sweet scent in the air and it's coming from him. Cautiously you brush against the caps again, slowly dipping your fingers under to touch the gills underneath. You keep your hand where it is when he thrashes again, but you're certain that smell is stronger now, and you catch the glimpse of clear viscous slick slowly leak from his hole.
Carefully you push a finger into his hole in an attempt to stretch him out. Logically you know that he probably doesn't feel it, but it feels wrong to just stick your cock in him; He's cold. You know he's dead but you had held out some hope that he would be warmer, that there would be some signs of life despite how stupid that sounds.
He's dry right now, but more of that clear fluid seeps around your fingers and lubes the way as you experimentally push your finger all the way up to the last knuckle, and you felt his muscles flutter around you, clenching down as if trying to draw you in deeper. His head continued to thrash around, no change in the feral behavior, but you still try to be gentle, pushing one then two fingers in and slowly scissoring him open.
You pull your fingers out when his hole has relaxed enough to let you easily slide your fingers in and out, and he's produced enough slick to completely drench your hand. You try to look at him as you press your cock against his fluttering hole, but the sight of his milky eyes almost makes you soft on the spot so you screw your eyes closed and slowly slide in.
Despite how cold and wet his cunt is, you haven't felt anyone's touch, even your own, since he got infected, and a part of you feels disgusted at how a bit of pleasure traces up your spine. He continues to hiss and click as you bottom out, his hips bucking wildly you have to press them down. You set a slower pace than you're used to, keeping your thrusts even and consistent, afraid to tear anything but your fear is seemingly misplaced. He's so much wetter than he'd ever get before he got infected, slick wetly squelching as you bottom out over and over again, clicks and snarls accompanying every move you make.
You're ashamed to say you don't last long. Fuck, is he tight you've been ignoring your body for so long that when you accidentally brush against the stalk growing from his clit and his cunt suddenly tightens up like a vice you cum on the spot, your hips doing little minute twitches as you empty so much of your cum in his cunt that your balls hurt. You pull out just as slowly, both of your mixed fluids leaking out and almost getting caught by the soft mushrooms framing his hole.
You muster up the courage to look him in the eyes, and your heart breaks when his lifeless eyes blindly stare back at you.
You feel like a fool when the first time doesn't work, he's still just a body pupated by a fungus. And you feel like an even bigger fool when you agree to do this a second time.
But the third time. . .
You don't know if it's just wishful thinking but he seems more. . . alert. His head always follows you when you approach him but now his milky eyes almost seem to be looking at your face instead of staring straight through you. He's strangely still on the chair, teeth gnawing on the ball gag but he doesn't try to get out of the restraints.
He doesn't screech when you gently caress the soft outer mushroom caps framing his cunt, instead his chest vibrates with more deep clicks. Nor does he start to wildly writhe on the chair when you slowly sink a finger into his cunt, finding it's already wet with slick. If anything he almost seems to chase(more like stumble) after the sensation, his hips doing small little movements to push your finger deeper into him.
Emboldened by childish hope you do something you hadn't before and reach with your other hand to slowly trace the long stalk of the clitshroom (not a term you coined), before rubbing the base of the cap like you would your own cock.
You nearly jump out of your skin when the gentle pressure of your fingers makes him buck into your hands and let out an ear-piercing screech that the gag has trouble muffling. You pull your hands away and that worsens the problem, the shrieking turning into literal chest rumbling snarls as Simon starts to struggle against the bindings.
Panic rushing down your system you put your hands were they were, gently stroking the 2 inch long mushroom growing from his clit. His hips buck up to chase after your hand, the snarls reverting back into shrieks, but as you stroke him longer they gradually die down to low pitched clicks and whistles. You're stumped; the clicks sound a lot like a cat's puff, his hole fluttering and clenching around your fingers as you slowly push them inside.
He's warmer now, not quite how he was before, but not cold as a corpse either. You know that you've gone completely mad by the fact he starts to gyrate his hips— grinding down just as you get knuckles deep so your fingers can brush against the sensitive spots inside him — makes your mind think that it's a bit of your Simon coming back.
You shake your head and pull your hands away, taking hold of his trembling thighs. You're greeted with another deep snarl but he quiets down immediately when you start to slowly push into him. He feels even tighter now, and you watch how his head falls back on the headrest, a long series of low clicks and whistles squirming past the gag.
His hips move to meet your slow thrusts, tight warm walls squeezing down every time you attempt to pull out just like he used to do. And that thought has your body increasing the pace automatically, your balls slapping against his ass, every sharp thrust hitting something spongy inside him and drawing out a sharp click, the rough pace leaving you panting.
Mindlessly you look up, too caught up in the moment remembering how Simon loved eye contact to remember the situation you're in.
He's looking straight at you.
You halt mid thrust, the low hiss he lets out falling on deaf ears as you tilt your head to the side. You're not insane, his eyes follow you. They're still milky, but they don't look through you. He's looking at you.
Another rough clicking sound leaves him and he thrusts his hips down against yours with enough strength to bruise, almost impatient. Despite how stupid it is you reach out and quickly unbuckle the gag with trembling fingers. "Si?" You say, unable to hide the hope in your voice. "Are you there?" You lean over him, looking hopefully into his eyes. "Do you remember me?"
His jaw moves like he's munching on a survivor, but all that leaves his mouth are more clicks and rough grunts.
Fuck. You are a fool.
A sob tears through your chest before you can stop it, ducking your head down to lay it on his chest. You're unable to keep the fresh tears from falling on him, watering the damned mushrooms that had taken him from you. You can't stop the sobs from coming, your back bowed and shoulders shaking as you cry just as much as the day you first lost him.
His chest vibrates with another long series of clicks and whistles, just pouring salt on the gaping would in your chest.
Your name rights through the room.
It's scratchy, rough, almost incomprehensible to your ears, but it's your name.
You look up so quickly you almost snap his neck. "Simon?" You whisper, staying in him even as you feel yourself soften. "Are you in there?" You slowly reach out to hold his face, careful not to cut your hands on the sharp mushroom caps along his cheeks.
He looks at you back, jaw moving still, but he doesn't try to bite the flesh of your palms despite your hands being right there. "Ckckck-" He clicks, pupils going from pinpricks to blown out, "Ckckrkck- Mo- ckck-ve." He manages, a thrust of his hips accompanying the order.
Your heart leaps to your throat and you can do nothing but follow it, sliding one hand down to dig your nails into his thigh, looming over him as you pull out until only the head is inside and them slam into him that there's an audible clap of skin on skin as you bottom out. A half shriek half click half "Yes!" escapes him as he throws his head back, slack jawed.
A whole range of noises escapes him as you hammer into him with all you've got, one hand remaining always on his face. You can feel him getting hotter the longer you pound into him, body shaking as each thrust nails his sensitive spot. He gets progressively tighter and tighter as you fuck into him, and you let go of his thigh to carefully strike along the long shaft of the clitshroom.
He shrieks at the top of his lungs and his cunt clenches down on you like a vice, fluttering around you and gripping your cock like it doesn't want you to pull out. It pulls you into an orgasm,
"Simon?" You whisper, staying in him even as you feel yourself soften. He's too silent compared to how vocal he had been a few moments ago. "Are you in there?"
His head rolls a bit, peering at you through through his lashes, tongue moving heavily in his mouth and lips twitching up into a soft of barely-there grin. "Cckck- l- ckckc- love- ckrk-you -ckkckrkckck-"
Taglist: @dead-end-stuff
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prongsiepotter · 5 months
Text
sunbathing by the black lake | j. potter
summary: your childhood best friend james is being a little shit but in an endearing sort of way while showing his little acts of love
pairing: james potter x childhood bsf!reader
a/n: my first time writing on this blog!! i have a childhood friends to lovers playlist on spotify if anyone wants to listen to it bc i have a feeling it’s all i’ll write abt lol would really appreciate some feedback! enjoy x
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There's no way to explain how the energy shifts when James is around. It simply does. Just like how you can feel the sun beating down on you right now. Hence, you can sense his approach without as much as a glance at him, your gaze continuing to drift across the notes Remus left for you in the margins of your essay.
James knows that, of course, as he strides across the grass towards you. You have never really talked about it, but seeing how he can also just tell when you're about to enter a room he's in, you both have made it a habit to not announce your presence. There's just no need.
So when he plops down next to you and rests his chin on your shoulder like it's his birthright, neither of you is surprised. In fact, it’s just right. Like puzzles slotting in perfectly.
For a few minutes, the world consists of birds chirping, a warm breeze, and the distant laughter of a group of Hufflepuff girls sitting a few paces away. You flip the page and let out a huff of laughter. James chuckles, his voice low and right next to your ear as he says, "Wouldn't be Moony if everything he touches didn't have a chocolate stain on it."
"It's like he's marking his territory." You try to rub it off with your sleeve, but the smudge only gets bigger. You squint and hold the paper in front of you, trying to discern if it's that noticeable (it is) but with a shrug you decide you couldn't care less. The movement makes James' glasses slide down to the tip of his nose, and he leans forward to make a dramatic face at you as if you had done him deeply wrong. With a playful eye-roll, you push them back for him and get a signature James Potter smile in return.
"Cheers, love." He beams at you and retrieves a balled-up napkin from the inside of his robe before taking it off. You watch him roll up the sleeves of his white Oxford shirt to his elbows, placing the mystery napkin on your lap. You glance at it curiously. "Unwrap it," he says. "It's for you."
Doing as you're told, you perk up with excitement when the content reveals itself. "Effie sent them?" You hold up the mangled piece of apple crumble like it's the most sacred thing you have ever gotten to hold, which it is. James nods, smiling at your happy dance. "I love her apple crumbles. Thank you!"
"You love everything my mum bakes," he says while lying down on his side, right in front of you with his head propped up on his palm. There's a glimmer in his amber eyes.
You give him a pointed look.
"Because everything that lovely woman bakes is the most scrumptious and amazing thing to exist." You take a big bite from the apple crumble to prove your point and your eyes flutter close as you hum. "This is why we're friends, Potter," you say with a mouthful. "No other reason. This is it."
"Oh yeah?" You hear the amusement in the drawl of his voice. Then he cups the side of your face and you look down at him as he distractedly brushes off some crumbs from the corner of your mouth. He looks up at the sky. "That's a shame because this is the last time you will get anything my mum has baked."
James' gaze is still turned upward, giving the sky his utmost interest as if to check if it's still blue. You stare at him in bewilderment. "Are you insane? Why would you deprive me of Effie's food?"
"I wonder how the weather will be tomorrow," he responds flippantly, and you swear your eye twitches.
"Oh, I'm sorry," you say, narrowing your eyes at him. "I forgot you were satan's spawn."
James does not react. You don’t think he will even reply with the way how he’s squinting and examining the very much non-existent clouds in the clear sky. But then he looks at you like you had asked him to solemnly share his meteorology findings with you, and with undeserved earnestness he tells you, "I think tomorrow will be just as sunny as today."
You blink at him. Then give a long-suffering sigh. "I thought you cared about me."
"I do," James says, rolling over to lay on his back with his eyes closed. "Which is why I can't have you lose your mind over some flour and sugar. I'm doing us a favour. Preserving our friendship." He cracks an eye open to look at you. "We've been friends since diapers, not because of my mum’s food, but because I'm brilliant and extremely lovable. Get your facts straight, woman."
You toss the napkin at his face.
He laughs.
Glancing at the last piece of the apple crumble in your hand, you ask, "Do you want it?"
James shakes his head, looking fond. "You assault me and then offer me the last bite?"
"Force of habit," you say flatly. "I can take it back."
He chuckles and takes off his glasses, resting his arm over his eyes. "You can have it, love. Cheers."
You don't have to be told twice and pop it happily in your mouth. With his other arm, he sweeps the scattered pages aside and pats the spot next to him. "Sleep with me?"
You quirk a brow. "Trying to get into my knickers, Potter?"
A breathy laughter escapes his lips. "Are you offering?"
"You wish."
"Merlin, yes." He sighs dramatically as if all James Potter has known in this lifetime was the pain of longing. He grabs blindly for you and pulls lightly at the hem of your skirt. "A man can dream. But for now just nap with me, yea?"
You bat at his wrist but let him pull you towards him nonetheless. There was never any other option, really.
In the blink of a moment, you're nestled into James’ side. His arm is cushioning your head, fingers absentmindedly playing with your hair as he tells you his thoughts on a book he recently read because he knew you liked it. You listen intensely, enjoying the easy conversation and the sunlight warming your skin. The world feels peaceful, and it doesn't take long before sleep pulls you both into a cosy slumber.
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