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#like damn i know shits fucked i KNOW it
luxwing · 1 year
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Idk sometimes my mom spends a lot of time dooms rolling through the news and she starts reading off all this terrible shit to me and I'm like "so what am I supposed to do about it?" And saying that just stun-locks her because like what the fuck ARE we supposed to do about all this shit? We don't have any power or control over whatever the fuck is going on so why the hell do we drown ourselves in despair over it?
Then she just does it again the next day and I honestly wouldn't care if she just didn't feel like she had to tell me about it like yeah you know what I absolutely needed to know about everyone threatening to drop nukes and how queer people are still being murdered you're right that all is news to me and I haven't been living most of my life already knowing that shit but thanks
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inkskinned · 1 year
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you're in the habit of denying yourself things.
if someone asked you directly, you would say that you love a little treat. you like iced coffee and getting the cookie. you drink juice out of a fancy cup sometimes, and often do use your candles until they gutter out helplessly.
but you hesitate about buying the 20 dollar hand mixer because, like. you could just use your arms. you weren't raised rich. you don't get to just spend the 20 dollars (remember when that could cover lunch?), at least - you don't spend that without agonizing over it first, trying to figure out the cost-benefits like you are defending yourself in front of a jury. yes, this rice cooker could seriously help you. but you do know how to make stovetop rice and it really isn't that hard. how many pies or brownies would you actually make, in order to make that hand mixer worthwhile?
what's wild is that if the money was for a friend, it would already be spent. you'd fork over 40 without blinking an eye, just to make them happy. the difference is that it's for you, so you need to justify it.
and it sneaks in. you ration yourself without meaning to - you don't finish the pint of ice cream, even though you want to. the next time you go to the store, you say ah, i really shouldn't, and then you walk away. you save little bits of your precious things - just in case. sometimes you even go so far as putting that one thing in your shopping cart. and then just leaving it there, because maybe-one-day, but not right now, there's other stuff going on.
you do self-care, of course. but you don't do it more than like, 3 days in a row. after that it just feels a little bit over-the-edge. like. you can't live in decadence, the economy is so bad right now, kid.
so you don't buy the rice cooker. you can-and-will spend the time over the stove. you can withstand the little sorrows. denial and discipline are practically synonyms. and you're not spoiled.
it's just - it's not always a rice cooker. sometimes it is a person or a job or a hug. sometimes it is asking for help. sometimes it is the summer and your college degree. sometimes it is looking down at scabbed knees and feeling a strange kind of falling, like you can't even recognize the girl you used to be. sometimes it is your handprint looking unsteady.
sometimes it is tuesday, and you didn't get fired, and you want to celebrate. but what is it you like, even? you search around your little heart and come up empty. you're so used to denying that all your desires draw a blank.
oh fuck. see, this is the perfect opportunity. if you had a mixer, you'd make a cake.
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RIP Will Campos the only person who was murdered this episode.
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coldbycrossfade · 11 months
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MAN THAT REALLY COLORS THIS RESPONSE IN THIS CONVERSATION SO DIFFERENTLY FOR ME
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coddda · 3 months
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Light's relationship with his father is such a heartbreaking multi-faceted tragedy to me I hate it so so so much.
Soichiro loves his son so much, and while he's certainly not a perfect father I know that he cares deeply about Light. He wants to prove Light's innocence so badly but he can't let go of the underlying doubt that he might really be Kira and it gnaws at him. He does not know that from the very beginning he was being used by Light, whether it was to obtain information about the investigation, or to get to L, or to strengthen the foundations of his own lie that he wasn't Kira, this entire time he was simply another resource. He'll hang onto this doubt for years, even after L is dead, even if he doesn't express it in the latter half of the series, until he himself is on his deathbed, with what he believes to be undeniable proof that Light isn't Kira. (It's a lie, of course.) He dies happy, but it's on the foundations of blissful ignorance. His own son brought him here, brought him to the point where he had to sacrifice half of his own remaining life span, to his own death march, and was still trying to use him even now to kill someone else, but he doesn't know that. Soichiro said that what was evil was the power to kill others, and that whoever used it was cursed. Light was that cursed man, of course, and he tried to bring that curse onto Soichiro too by making him kill in his last moments. Soichiro was happy regardless, because he didn't know. He'll never know. (In the manga/anime at least. More on that later).
Light loves his father but it's not enough to turn him away from the terrible decisions he's made, if anything it only fuels them. His idea of "justice" is a twisted model of what he parroted from Soichiro, and he uses his father as another pawn (and a powerful one at that) in his plans. If he can prove that Kira is justice then perhaps his father will no longer call Kira, and therefore Light, evil, so he just needs to ensure that Kira becomes justice, right? It's Light's own actions that land his own father in the hospital for a stress-induced heart attack and yet he says only a few minutes later that he's the happiest he's ever been in his entire life. Even after Soichiro denounces Kira by calling him evil, even after he calls the Death Note's power evil, even after he unknowingly tells Light that he is cursed. When Soichiro dies Light is too deep in his own plans to actually properly process the fact that his own father is dying past what it means for his goals, but at the same time he still cares enough that after the fact he'll genuinely cry, only to brush it all away later. (Personally, I don't have a single doubt in my mind that Light's crying in that scene was genuine and I Will die on this hill). Soichiro had unknowingly denounced Light one last time just before his death, openly relieved that he "wasn't Kira after all", which also reveals that he has had doubts about Light this entire time, even after L died. By the time he's caught at the Yellow Box Warehouse Light will have denounced his father too, seeing him as someone who was made to be a fool, someone who was naive, even, too earnest for his own good. He won't realize that part of this description of his father might have applied to Light himself, back when this all started. Light takes after his father so much in so many ways already, so why not in this way too?
Ough. And honestly the other adaptations never miss out on this tragedy either, and I love them for that. (spoilers for the musical and 2006 live action movies I guess?)
In the musical we see Soichiro express his doubts and conflicts about who to believe, Light or L, if the son he raised really is a murderer, if everything he knows about him is just a lie. Like, there's an entire song about this, and you can tell how torn he is about it all, how badly he wants Light to be innocent but about how he also needs to face the truth no matter what it is, but at the end of it all he doesn't even get the answers he wants. At the end of the musical the only thing he finds is two corpses, Light's and L's, with no answers. No last words, no closure, only dead ends and a dead son and a grieving daughter. It's so awful I hate it here.
And the live action movie is fucking Insane. Like, wow. Okay. (Spoiler for the ending of Death Note The Last Name I guess) In the 2006 movies/novels Light writes Soichiro's name in the Death Note himself, and it's such an inconcievable move that it leaves even Misa shocked; Light tries to make Soichiro give him the Death Note for the last part of his plans, seeing his death as a "necessary sacrifice" (insert tangent essay about why I think 2006 live action movie Light is actually the most "coldhearted" Light Yagami, despite how infamous anime Light is). It doesn't work, and Soichiro does end up finding out that Light is Kira this time, and they have a confrontation, but he doesn't even sound truly hateful towards Light for it. He Never seems to outright hate Light for it, even after Light calls the whole confrontation a waste of time and instead tries to continue killing with the piece of the notebook in his watch, even after he tries to get Ryuk to kill everyone. When Ryuk inevitably writes Light's name and he collapses, Soichiro still reaches out for him and holds onto him as he's dying. Light literally dies in Soichiro's arms, still looking for the validation that he was right, that this wasn't all for nothing, that he was doing the good thing, trying to make Soichiro understand that he was trying to enact justice based on what he learned from him in the first place. Soichiro not only learns but sees for himself what his son has become, and Light dies in his arms leaving no closure for either of them. Soichiro will announce Light's death in L Change the WorLd on the news without saying his name, saying instead that it is only Kira who is dead, even though he and Light are one in the same. Sachiko and Sayu will never get to know the full truth about what happened to Light, instead Soichiro will lie and instead tell them: "Light was killed by Kira."
And then holy Shit the jdrama. If I write about it here this post is gonna literally double in length and also I don't really wanna spoil it but. Man. Man. If you watched it you know. Holy Shit dude I Cried.
It's the fact that, canonically, Soichiro will die oblivious to what Light has done, but even in the instances where he does find out, it doesn't make it any better, and it doesn't make him love Light any less, it just gives him more to grieve.
It's the fact that there isn't a single universe where Light doesn't use his father for his own gain, whether to gain information, or to try and control him with the Death Note, or make him write in the Death Note himself, and not a single time will he realize just how far he's strayed from Soichiro's ideals, and not a single time will he not forsake him for it by the end of the story.
It's the fact that, despite everything, Light will always refers to Soichiro as "dad/my dad" (informal) rather than "father/my father", even after he has been "denounced" (and this is true in every language that Death Note has been translated in, as far as I could find. Man, isn't that so cool! :) <- Through tears).
Anyways that's what I've been thinking of how's your guys' days going
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pepperpixel · 2 months
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SAID HE LIKES CRAZY GIRLS,
BUT HE HATES WHEN I ACT CRAZY,
IT TAKES TWO TO TOXIC!
FINALLY!!! Finished these pics of jinx I’ve been working on!!!!! HOLY SHIT, these took so long…. But finally… they’re done… pls enjoy this art of my beautiful princess w a disorder. Featuring alternate colors for the big pic and also a closeup! Cuz I rlly like how both the lines and coloring on her face turned out… like the pink gradients w her eye… her deer in headlights expression,, like uve just startled a raccoon digging thru ur trashcan and r two seconds away from getting mauled.. m proud of it!
#arcane#league of legends#jinx#jinx arcane#arcane jinx#doodles#hate and love how hardcore I relate to jinx…#little sisters w dependency issues.. + a whole lot of other issues#anyway the ‘he’ in the ‘crazy girl’ lyrics is in my mind referring to both vi and silco lol#I’m sORRY! I keep seeing ppl hardcore pitting these 2 bad bitches against each other#and it’s like… silco is objectively. morally worse than vi.. vi is not like. a ruthless crime lord#vi IS 100% trying her best and loves her sister. but she still screwed up w jinx#and silco ALSO truly loves jinx. but also screwed up by fucking. trauma bonding w her ghgh-#like.. silco is too close. he’s like. yes go apeshit jinx I support and love you and understand u no matter what fucked up shit u do.#were the same. and that’s beautiful!!! I love how supportive he is…#but its like.. silcos too close. he just became a new person for jinx to glomp onto and base her self esteem around after vi left#and he doesn’t manipulate that on purpose but. he DOES effect that girls mental state. cuz he needs her too#meanwhile vi is too far away… she thinks she knows who jinx is. but jinx has changed… time marches forward. she’s not that little girl#anymore#and nOW! after the finale jinx has NOBODY TO BE CODEPENDENT W..#her mental state has always been so tied up in how the ppl she puts on pedestals view her#and now there’s no pedestal anymore. she knocked down the statues. she’s alone…#it’s interesting….#anyway I’m not trying to say vi is as bad as silco at ALL. just that she’s an equally important building block in jinx’s mind#that has made her into the fucked up lil person she is today. and I think that’s neat.#lol anyway! I’m hyped for season 2….#aLSO GOD DAMN THIS GIRLS OUTFIT IS COMPLICATED. WHY DO U GOT SO MANY BITS N BOBS JINX??? I mean I get it accessories rock.#but u take so much time to draw ghfhg- require so much brainpower#aLSO ADDENDUM. while silco is objectively morally worse than vi his relationship w jinx is genuinely. like. makes me emotional ghgh-#its not perfect. or healthy. but… it’s. the both of them. being seen. and accepted. and loved and understood.. and I love that shit.
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missingn000 · 4 months
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hey all! i wrote a what-if character study & action fic for if king fought sanji instead of zoro during the raid on onigashima. i'd really love if you gave it a read! thanks so much!
link
playlist
happy reading!
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bonefall · 4 months
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I understand being upset by the moonpaw dog post but i dont think talking about some random teen publicly (on a pretty big fandom blog) as opposed to like, dming them about it, is a very nice thing to do? Would recommend keeping that kinda gossip in dms going forward personally.
??????? "That kinda gossip???"
Saying that it's fucked up that a publicly posted incest joke about how deformed she should look went to the top of the Warrior Cats and Moonpaw tags, is gossip???
TRENDING TAGS?? GOSSIP?
I'm not talking about "some random teen," I have not even dropped a username and been VERY clear I don't want harassment of anyone. During this discussion about wider ableism against Moonpaw, I've directly answered two anons about the contents of a post that was/IS extremely popular to the tune of nearly a thousand notes.
One of those two asks was an anon who only stumbled in to say that the post was funny in a display of SHOCKING tonedeafness, while I was talking about how shitty it is to compare people who are the products of incest to unethical dog breeds, especially in the context of WC. The other was an actual XX/XY chimera who expressed that the extremely popular post hurt their feelings, and when they tried to express discomfort to someone, got told they "probably killed their twin in the womb."
It's not just one rando weenie little blog the minute half of the Tumblr space is openly laughing at a joke about deformed incest kids and hoping Moonpaw dies because she's so "gross." Not nice?? Your feelings are hurt? OTHER people's feelings were ALREADY hurt.
NOTHING about this was "nice" to begin with!
Difference is, when YOU cry me a river, you can build me a bridge, and get right the fuck over it. A person who's the product of incest cries and has to go right back to every shitty banjo-hunchback-hapsburg joke they've heard before, just feeling more unsafe about a space that PRETENDS to care about the abuse they experienced. If you feel guilty about that, maybe you should!
If you were under the impression I was ever "nice" about bigotry, you were mistaken. I don't appreciate calls for ME to be more polite when I'm at a trend of fandom ableism and calling it fucked up. I've named NO names. Sounds like what you ACTUALLY want is for people like me who have a platform to shut up.
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hazel2468 · 10 months
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I keep seeing people bitching about "uwu when I say 'from the river to the sea' people say I'm calling for geeenocide! They say I'm antisemitic!" and like.
Maybe. instead of clinging to a phrase that a bunch of white leftists have co-opted because they think it sounds nice. And digging your little immature heels in. You should LISTEN when people tell you that yes. The phrase's FUCKING ORIGIN was a call for the eradication of Jews from the area known as Israel and Palestine. That NO, you cannot divorce it from those roots. YES, it IS still used to mean that TO THIS DAMN DAY.
And look. Maybe you DON'T think that Israelis should all be killed and/or exiled from Israel and Palestine. Maybe you DON'T think that the genocide of an entire people is the solution. Maybe you DON'T hate Jews and want all of us dead. And if that's the case? Great!
But how the FUCK are we supposed to tell the difference when you are using the EXACT same phrase as countless people who DO want those things. People who DO hate Jews, who ARE supportive of organizations that want to commit violence, people who SUPPORT what happened on October 7th?
When people tell you "hey, this phrase means something else, it has ALWAYS come from those roots, and using it is NOT OKAY because it is STILL used as a rallying cry for violence against Israelis and Jews worldwide", the way to react? Is NOT to fucking double down and use it.
Because that? DOES make you an antisemite. And if I see you using that phrase? Then I MUST assume that at best, you do not know what it means and have SOMEHOW avoided the countless Jews and non-Jews I have seen talking about it, or at WORST you actively hate me and want me and every single one of my people dead.
And frankly? You are not worth that risk to interact with.
Stop saying it. There are SO many ways to support Palestine, the Palestinian people, and their fight for rights, that do not involve spouting genocidal, antisemitic rhetoric. it is NOT HARD.
But apparently, some of y'all are insistent on being racist.
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mayxo-hxh · 6 months
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According to shalnark, manipulators are EXTREMELY VULNERABLE without their preferred weapon of choice, as they cannot use their nen abilities at all without it. As I quote, "Losing the preferred weapon is often FATAL"
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THEN WHY.
WHY.
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WHY???????????????????
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THE ONE TIME ILLUMI DOESNT HAVE ANY PINS ON HIM. HIS PREFERRED WEAPON OF CHOICE. THAT AS A MANIPULATOR HE SHOULD NEVER GO ANYWHERE WITHOUT. IS WHEN HE GOES ON A PRIVATE DATE WITH HISOKA.
HES COMPLETELY VULNERABLE. ZERO PINS. DO YOU REALIZE. DO YOU REALIZE!!!!!!!????!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?
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GAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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saragapen · 2 years
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“Ah dinnae ken you wore dog tags, L.T”
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me, slapping the roof of the Stupid Rich People Underwater Death Tube: you could get so many tma statements outta this bad boy
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dollypopup · 9 months
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'colin needs to grovel' 'colin should suffer' 'pen can't let him off easy'
please, his mother in law is about to be PORTIA, doesn't the man have enough curses in his life?
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eightspringdays · 3 days
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People who infantilize autistic coded characters are the weakest link in society's chain.
How are you gonna look at this mf
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And then tell me he's too uwu to do anything. Open your eyes, expand your brain; he thinks of the MCnasty too. Let him say fuck !!!!
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@val-the-bun hits me with a padded sledge hammer in the feels with the wereharpy vaggie au thanks for that once again i inflict this ask on others as a coping mechanism >:C
val-the-bun asked:
Charlie can see the claw marks on Vaggie's side, golden blood, *angel* blood, dripping onto the floor... Her grip on the spear is shaking.
'Did you ever believe in me, Vaggie?'
Another shriek, weak and *crackling* is her only answer. Vaggie's talons fall, and she almost *leans* into the point of the spear. She can see the tears streaming down Vaggie's face.
The spear slips out of charlie's fingers. Her hands are shaking too much. She grabs Vaggie by the feathers, glaring up at her.
'Do you?'
Vaggie is *shaking*, taloned hands curling around Charlie with a *whimper*.
Charlie is clinging to Vaggie as the monster *buckles* around her. She lets out another whimper, nuzzling against her face. She cant keep her tail from curling around Vaggie, burying her face in those feathers she knows so well.
'Oh Vaggie...'
I am picturing a lot of comfort after this
Like just
Vaggie all bandaged up
And just curled up with Charlie in the lobby. And she's just gently brushing Vaggie's feathers.
'So uh, does anybody wanna explain why Vaggie Tales is doin' a heavenly werebird in hell?'
'I... I dont know. Maybe this is just... Maybe this is what happens if an exorcist stays down here?'
Eventually Vaggie starts changing back. Which, ya know, yay!
Aaaand also oh shit. Because uh. *She kind of shredded her outfit in her transformation*. And her spare one is back in what's left of the room she was holed up in.
'Oh, fuck. Uh. Blanket? Quick? PLEASE???'
Queue a very embarrassed and kind of ashamed Vaggie curled up in a *huge* blanket. But...Charlie's holding her. Vaggie may not think she deserves it, but she is.
'Please tell me I didnt try to eat anybody...'
'Oh, no my dear. Shreading on the other hand!'
Charlie gives Alastor a glare that surprisingly shuts him up. Meanwhile Vaggie has basically disappeared into the blanket, save the barest hint of white hair.
'Dont worry about it Vags, your aim was pretty shit.'
Queue a jab in the side from Husk.
'What! It's true! She missed!'
(Aaand that's all i got for this for now. Might do more in the future. Might write a fic. Who knows!)
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shrimpalbuspotter · 3 months
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Trying to scroll through snape tiktoks without getting "stan bambi" or a paragraph comment on why Snape is horrible. Like I don't give a fuck if he's horrible I'm trying to live my life! Please look at your favs before speaking
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