#like maybe an outside the party member or college friend etc who doesn’t GET it just yet

[hawkwidows]

I know the idea of mike telling people off if they try and call shotgun for his car bc that’s will’s seat has been discussed but I think the thought of will being visibly offended someone would attempt to sit in the passenger seat when he’s right there, is equally as funny

[shepherds-of-haven]

How would the romances with the RO's be in a college!AU? And how would the romance start?

Hmm I don’t know necessarily what they’d be like without having to write the college!AU myself lol, it sort of would depend on how the story itself went! As for how they start...

Blade: classic. Blade and MC bump into each other on campus when they’re both preoccupied with something--literally bump. Books go spilling everywhere. They bend down to pick them up. Look up and BAM. Blade has a crush. But then MC has to hurry away because they’re in a rush until next semester. They have a class together! But Blade is too shy to talk to MC so MC thinks he’s forgotten her/doesn’t recognize her. They have more classes together and with each shared class, he plucks up the courage to talk to her after she drops a pencil and he picks it up (now their desks are actually next to each other). They start hanging out under the guise of being study partners for all their shared classes.

Trouble: he’s playing a game of toss the football or frisbee golf or whatever in the quad and either he or his friend nails MC in the head with a projectile. Trouble comes jogging over and profusely apologizes. MC slyly or jokingly suggests he buy them dinner to make up for giving them a concussion and he readily agrees. That’s their first date!

Tallys: she’s growing plants in the student lab as part of her thesis and is frustrated that one of her plants is struggling to grow. She goes outside to smoke and starts talking to herself out loud in frustration. “The conditions are exactly the same. Why would one ____ specimen weaken while the others thrived?” MC is also outside (either smoking as well or just tending to other plants) and says, “It sounds like being on the end of the row is hampering its roots. Maybe because they grow westward?” Tallys whirls around and is like ‘who the fuck are you??’ all suspicious this is a rival student who’s trying to sabotage her thesis. But MC just likes plants! They talk a bit more and Tallys reluctantly agrees to try re-potting the weak specimen in a bigger container (idk I don’t know plants, you get the picture). A week later, the plant is thriving! Tallys waits in the same spot outside to see if MC will show up, not smoking this time. She crosses her arms and says, “You were right about the plant. I’ll buy you dinner as thanks for saving my thesis.” MC accepts but replies they don’t need the thanks. Tallys smirks. “Consider it a bribe, then. I bet I’ll need you for future consultations.”

Shery: she’s working in the coffee shop and MC comes by every once in a while and makes conversation, pairing the coffee with a winning smile. Shery falls head over heels, but surprisingly doesn’t get nervous or stammers when MC comes in. In fact, she looks forward to it! But their interactions are always a few minutes every few days, until one day Briony is behind the counter too and does something sly like suggest they look cute together or writes Shery’s phone number on a napkin for MC or something. MC gets it, smiles at Shery, and says, “Can I take you out for a coffee? Somewhere that’s... not here, I guess.” Briony: “You can do it here!” Shery: “Yes!”

Riel: he’s playing piano in one of the practice rooms and, as he’s leaving, he sees MC leaning on the wall opposite of the practice room door. Riel asks MC if they’re waiting for anyone, as he’d reserved the room for several hours, and MC answers, “No, I just heard you playing and it was so beautiful that I got lost in the music. It’s Scarlatti, right?” Riel gets a huge brain-boner and gives MC his number under the guise of offering ‘free piano lessons’ if MC wants to learn. MC surprises him by actually showing up!

Chase: Chase gets a starring role in the play he secretly auditioned for, but he’s super nervous because he’s never acted in anything before and doesn’t want to fuck it up for the other play members. MC, an actor in a minor role, hears him fretting over the phone one night to Trouble or someone and offers to help him rehearse and ease his anxiety. They start meeting up to read lines together, MC coaching him, and the chemistry between them steadily builds. Chase realizes during rehearsal--when he has to kiss his star opposite--that it’s really MC he’d like to be kissing, and right after that he takes them out on a date and confesses his feelings!

Red: MC and Red are assigned to be lab partners together in a science class, and they start flirting from the get-go, talking about the CHEMISTRY between them as they measure stuff in beakers. They exchange numbers for class and start meeting at Red’s dorm/townhouse for study sessions. One day they give up early and put on a movie, but neither of them are really concentrating on the movie. Before even halfway they’re making out on the couch!

Ayla: Ayla gets drunk at a party and meets MC. She’s so plastered she’s dancing all up on MC and shouting things like “you’re pretty! I like you! I’m gonna marry you someday!” At the end of the night she loses Briony and Lavinet, so MC offers to walk her home to make sure she gets there safely. Ayla is either so drunk MC gives her a piggyback ride or they have to hold hands the whole way. (Ayla gets lost and doesn’t remember where she lives several times.) When they get to her doorstep she grabs MC and kisses them, but they gently ease away and see her safely indoors. In the morning Ayla wants to die from the embarrassment and contemplates jumping from the window. Instead she rides on her Vespa to her favorite breakfast diner for some hangover cures and what do you know! MC works at that restaurant part-time and reveals they thought they recognized her as a regular but weren’t sure... but the Vespa seals it. Still humiliated, Ayla buys them breakfast on their break but quickly realizes she wants to spend more time with them when the meal is over, so she asks for their number!

Briony: Briony is training at her MMA gym and hitting a punching bag pretty hard, venting out her frustrations for the day. MC, who also trains at the gym, comes over and asks if she’d like a sparring partner instead of a bag; Briony laughs and says, “Only if you’re okay with getting hit.” “Wouldn’t have come over if I wasn’t,” MC quips. They spar, and the electricity and flirtation between them is pretty obvious. Briony is grinning--she hasn’t fought anyone like this for a while--but then she glances up and thinks she sees a face watching her in the gym’s front window. Her mood immediately deflates, and MC notices. They notice that she seems nervous or anxious, so they offer to walk her out to her car. Briony shakes her head and asks if they’d like to grab a milkshake or dinner at this diner down the road instead; she needs to take her mind off things. MC agrees and soon enough, Briony’s laughing and happy again. They have such a good time that they exchange numbers and agree to make it a routine: sparring and then eating together!

Lavinet: Lavinet’s in this higher-level class--I don’t know, say it’s like... fashion design, or pre-law or something. At the end of the semester, the professor chooses a handful of students to go with her to Paris for a study abroad trip/internship. Lavinet’s pretty assured that she’ll get one of the slots because her father is a good friend of the professor. But then MC shows up and starts beating her in class: answering all the questions first or correctly, getting just one point above her on tests, etc. It drives Lavinet crazy, and they become rivals. Lavinet regularly snubs him and gives him the cold shoulder, feeling competitive. MC gives it right back. But then they find out a third person is planning on cheating in order to get that internship slot, and MC and Lavinet vow to beat them the traditional way. Putting aside their differences in the face of a common enemy, Lavinet and MC become allies and study buddies. Eventually Lavinet deigns to give MC the opportunity to ask her out, at the end of the semester when they find out that they’re the two who have gotten the internship. The entire time she insisted she hated MC’s guts, but everyone else in her life saw through it lol. Maybe their first date is in Paris!

[astralprcjects]

first of all, if you saw me accidentally post this when it was half done, no you didn’t <3 but anyway, i’m following the trend and throwing out some ideas for connections !! i’d love some new plots, so if any of these catch your eye pls don’t hesitate to come yell at me :))) discord is the best place to reach me ( jojo she-ra#5493 ) or tumblr ims work just fine too !! 

i get very confused whether likes are just for support or if you’re interested in any plots so pls pls just dm me or drop a reply and i’ll come to you !! i’m not scary i promise just nervous like a shaky dog <3

a few important points:

mars is a lesbian, so romantic plots can only be taken up by female and non binary characters.

rosalie is bisexual and polyamorous – they have no interest in monogamy. she likes to form connections with people, and so much prefers casual flings and dating with no strings over one night stands.

both of my characters use she and they pronouns interchangeably. please don’t refer to them as women or misgender them in any way ( i’m always happy to answer any questions if you’re confused !! )

── 👻 M A R C E L I N E

extroverted friends – a lot of mars’ friends are introverts and she loves them dearly, but sometimes they just needs to be around people who match their energy !! so friends who will happily get excited with her and share their own passions in return ?? they’re extremely loyal and latch onto people quickly, so would be over the moon for that energy to be matched. ( open – all )

the non-believer – this muse doesn’t believe in ghosts or aliens or anything supernatural. so, naturally, mars has made it her life’s mission to change their mind. they have constant debates and light-hearted fights; they both enjoy trying to prove the other wrong. ( open – all )

horror movie besties – mars loves a good scary movie, but they always appreciates a familiar shoulder to hide behind. she and this character share a passion for horror movies and have regular movie nights. they always accompany each other to see the latest scary flicks in the cinema or re-runs of old classics. ( open – all )

unrequited crush – someone that mars is close friends with, who she is sure she feels more than friendship for. they respect their boundaries and will always be afraid to tell them, but can’t help but quietly pine from a far. ( open – f/enby )

requited crush – same as above, except the other person feels the same and now they’re dancing around each other ( open – f/enby )

friends who grew apart – they used to be close, mars used to tell them everything, but something pulled them apart. perhaps they both had feelings for the same person, or your character became irritated by mars’ constant pestering. mars can also get bored easily, maybe she became bored of this person too ?? or maybe mars had a crush on them and pulled away out of panic. ( open – all (f/enby only for ex-crush) )

amicable exes – they dated for a few months and it was great, but other circumstances caused them to break up. they didn’t see each other for a while, but later reunited and realised that, although they had both moved on, they still really cared for each other and struck up a strong friendship instead. now they are each other’s go-to for relationship/dating advice, since they know each other so well. ( open – f/enby )

co-workers and work connections – mostly fellow journalists, or people who work in the magazine/newspaper industry. marcie works freelance, so she works for various publications across the city and would have contacts in most places who she can call upon for favours. they would also have a string of contacts from previous articles they’ve written; perhaps she has interviewed your character or they are someone with a lot of connections themselves which she can utilise. usually at a price, of course. ( open – all )

no man is an island – mars is desperately trying to become an author, but they can’t do it alone. so anyone who works in the industry is a valuable asset – publishers, editors, fellow authors, you name it and mars probably wants their number. she can go to these people for help and advice when she faces a setback, or just wants to use their placement in the industry to try to launch her career. they are, of course, always well compensated with baked goods and cups of coffee. ( open – all )

rivals – mars can be incredibly irritating and she knows that, but she doesn’t appreciate when people are cruel or rude to her about it. this muse simply can’t stand marcie and so the feeling is mutual and they avoid each other at all costs, even if the universe sometimes has other ideas. ( open – all )

 ── 🌹 R O S A L I E

gossip sources – people always know people who know people and rosalie is insufferably nosey. she always wants to know everything that’s going on and can never keep her opinions to herself. as such, she is an excellent person to go for if you need to rant or want impartial advice, just as long as you remember to tell her not to spread the news beforehand. otherwise the entire borough of queens might know your business by lunchtime. ( open – all )

college friends – rosalie studied at nyu from 2012 to 2016, so could have crossed paths with all kinds of people during this time !! maybe they’ve stayed in touch ever since, maybe they lost track of each other once their lives divulged but now have an opportunity to reconnect ?? ( open – all )

makeover victims – rosalie loves all things beauty (makeup, hair, nails, fashion, the full works) and, even more than that, loves experimenting on other people. these characters are her canvas; whether they have an event they’re attending, or are off on a date, or even just fancy an afternoon of being pampered, rosalie will always be at their doorstep with a fully equipped makeup kit if they just say the word. ( open – all )

practically cousins – rosa’s family is huge and they are well known for inviting anyone and everyone over for dinner, especially if those people don’t have family of their own or are far away from home. rosalie’s friends are considered family and are welcome in their home. ( open – all )

friends of her family – the above courtesy is of course extended to their family member’s friends. perhaps this muse is close to one of rosalie’s siblings, but doesn’t get along with rosa at all. the two try to get along over the dinner table (mostly to avoid her abuela’s wrath), but outside of that they bicker relentlessly and can’t seem to ever see eye to eye. ( open – all )

rivals – rosalie is an insufferable gossip who can’t keep their mouth shut unless they were sworn to secrecy. maybe she spilled a secret of your muse’s by accident and they have never forgiven her for it ?? she’s not spiteful and is very openminded so it would be something she thought was harmless or common knowledge, which also means she doesn’t really accept that she did anything wrong. ( open – all )

heartbroken – their dating life is a mess and they tend to pull away if things get too serious, so she’s likely to have a string of people who have been hurt by her distancing herself from them. maybe there was a miscommunication and rosalie thought they were only hooking up but the other thought they were dating ?? or maybe they were something more serious, but rosalie broke it off when it got too real ?? there are lots of options to play with !! ( open – all )

casual hookups – because she doesn’t want to get attached, rosalie has multiple casual partners. neither party wants anything more serious, but it is fun to hook up with each other and go out on dates without any of the strings that usually comes with that. if we want the d r a m a, perhaps your muse actually does want more, but rosalie is scared to commit. ( open – all )

industry friends – actors, directors, screenplay writers etc. the entertainment industry is a tangled mess of egos, but when you make friends you keep them close. these are people rosalie can run lines with, they tell each other about auditions and support each other through the madness that is the career path they’ve both chosen. rosalie is never afraid to speak her mind, so she is always someone that can be relied upon for constructive, impartial advice. ( open – all )

[shesawriter39049]

|7 DEEP| M| MASTERLIST|

SMUT/ANGST/FLUFF/POLY AU 

AU SUMMARY- Your husband Namjoon and yourself run a successful Adult Film Entertainment Company called “Onyx” with your 5 best friends from college who you also happen to be in an open relationship with! This is a candid in-depth look at the rollercoaster ride that is your life!

ALSO LOWKEY A RAGS TO RICHES STORY.....

Namjoon, Yoongi, Jin, Tae, Hoseok, and Jimin, all already work with the OC and Joon, Kookie comes in later one as a new hire...and the possible final piece…

DISCLAIMER: Obv this is a poly so the boys are Bi..but outside of kissing and dirty talk I have not YET ventured into physical MXM….

NOTE- As long as this keeps getting support the initial plan is 7 one-shots, one for each boys. Everyone installment will have smut as well as a overall storyline, one that not only ties into your job, but also the OC’s (AKA YOU) special dynamic with each individual member. The last one-shot (7th) will be the first and maybe only one where smut wise it’s all 7 of them, it will finally address how they all came together, and will be partially a flashback sequence. HOWEVER, there will be bits and pieces of the “Characters” lives and what not sprinkled within the “drabbles” too...so those will also be worth reading especially, as the story developes....or at least reading the summaries! 

Kookie will make appearances throughout, however, he is NOT as involved off rip as the other boys…

ONE-SHOTS SO FAR :

AFTER-HOURS- NAMJOON X OC (Tae comes in at the end) - 

ABOUT- Your husband and business partner find you up way past acceptable work hours for the 3rd night in a row! So, daddy has to step in and remind you that’s not something we do in this household. You come before work, in every sense of the phrase!

OR-You're in desperate need of a 2nd videographer/editor, because Yoongi’s in over his fucking head! So here you are, up at 1 AM scrolling through resumes because your that boss that hates to overwork her employees so she overworks herself!

AKA- “MEET THE KIMS” 

PRETTY PLEASE- TAEHYUNG X OC - ( Joon comes in at the end)

About- Tae fucks you on top of your receptionist's desk before you fire her…

Or- Tae’s feeling a little needy...and somewhat high-key self continuous about you possibly hiring a new production assistant...AKA...Jungkook. It seems as though Mr. Kim takes pride in being the youngest within the office! It seems as though your baby boy just needs a little..reassurance…

JIN & CHOCOLATE- JIN X OC (FT A lil Seok at the end ) - 

(5K SMUT WITH A SIDE OF PLOT! NOT JIN’S INTRO CHAPTER) 

About-You suck Jin off…and brownie batter may or may not be somewhat involved because why the fuck not. Oh, Hoseok comes over to drop off weed…and welll….doesn't exactly leave

Or- His assistants birthday is tomorrow and she’s insisted on him making his infamous “Dizzy Brownies” AKA…pot brownies and Jin being the perfectionist he is, scrapes the first batch. You however, think they’re fine and if he’s not gonna bake with said  batter you’ll find use for some of it…..Then Hosoek stops by to bring the missing ingredient…weed and his dick…

TOUCH ME , TEASE ME- NAMJOON X OC 

(5K, IN COLORATION TO THE EVENTS THAT WILL TAKE PLACE IN “GOT ME LOOSIN’ ALL MY COOL)

About- Namjoon eats you out the minute you walk in the door because well…that’s the kinda husband he is!

Or- Jimin text’s Namjoon to brace him for the mood you’ll more than likely be in after a day full of drama and finally firing the front desk receptionist! Which essentially red for him to make you come hard AF and then feed you….OH, and You guys invite Yoongi over to talk about the Tae and Kookie “Thing”

PRIVATE SHOW- TAE X OC (NEW) 

(5k, Holiday esque one-shot however for the 1st time it does dive into the downside of being in a poly relationship that’s essentially a secret in the publics eye) 

About-Just a casual lunch outing where Tae’s trying to do his job and your trying to get him off under the table with your shoe...nothing new!

OR- Tae and yourself are grabbing lunch at 71 Above, after checking out the last couple of venues for the company's end of the year Holiday party. While at said restaurant, it becomes a humbling reminder that the most important people in your life are essentially a secret...cute!

 UP AND COMING: In no particular order! 

MUTED- YOONGI X OC (SIDE JIN)- HIATUS

Note, this is more of a smut drabble though it will be around 3k...this is NOT Yoongi/Jin’s official “Introduction” if that makes sense….(SNEAK PEEK IS LINKED) 

About-Yoongi goes down on you in the back seat while you’re on a business call….Jin’s driving, lowkey watching..and being a little shit the entire time…

Or- You’re on the phone with a dick of an investor and a second away from losing your shit and calling off the entire deal…however…your boys decide to “distract” you. Give you a little something to keep you at ease so you don’t blow this 6 figure account…

MAKE ME PROUD- JIMIN X OC (ALL THE MEMBERS ARE IN THIS BRIEFLY)

About-  Jimin and yourself take a trip to get a sneak peek at “Filter” before it opens… and Jimin fucks you on top of the bartop…

Or- Jimin’s ready to make his first solo big boy investment….AKA...opening up his own Gay club in WeHo...and the new business venture also reopen’s old wounds about his past. Both good and bad..but at the end of the day he remembers he wouldn’t the version of himself that he’s oh so proud of...without a little someone named “Y/N” 

 “PARTY FAVORS”- YOONGI X OC- 

About- You and Yoongi get a little one on one time while in Amsterdam, IE getting completely stoned, and attending a sex show..hell maybe even joining in on a sex show...shit just get’s wild in the Dam!

OR- You and your boys jet out to Amsterdam for the weekend to celebrate 16 AVN award nominations (AKA THE TONY’S/GRAMMY’S OF PORN) and while high and in a country where nobody knows who you are...(which means Yoongi and yourself are free to do as you please even in public)....Yoongi admits for the first time that sometimes he feels a type of way that HE wasn’t the one that married you considering the two of you were a thing FIRST....

“CHAMPAGNE SHOWERS” - JIN X OC (Side Namjoon)- NEW 

About- Jin says he's coming over to discuss business over brunch, champagne, and a nice Jacuzzi bath…which, of course, leads to more than just talk about “Finances and portfolio expansions” 

OR: Jin’s the eldest, he loves control, he needs control, hints why he’s the finical controller..always has been...even in the domestic sense. Jin’s also shit at feelings he’s used to being the shoulder to cry on not needing the shoulder..he’s not used to feeling vulnerable...so it’s not to easiest for him to admit that he misses being the one you all come home too...misses being “needed”! He’s used to being the one that has his shit together, being the glue that’s held you lot together during your worst times..so this...is completely out of his comfort zone!

“ALL EYES ON ME”  - HOSEOK X OC (FT OT7)-  NEW 

About- Hoseok and yourself have sex in a very questionable place while at the launch party for ‘Spectrum” I.E. your newest business venture...sex toys…your man deserves a little…”Thank you” for all the work he’s put in...including planning this party!

OR- Hoseok’s in over his fuckin head, he’s the one essentially spearheading the launch of “Spectrum” which is obviously his job as the head of Marketing, tactical ETC, however, this is just..different...he’s literally the one steering the boat. He’s good at what he does he knows this, he’s fucking made for it...but...it;s still’ bringing out some old, nasty insecurities...reminding him how he's his own worst critic...a perfectionist to the fault. Reminding them of those days where he never thought he was good enough...and it would absolutely break him if he lets you lot down! 

“GOT ME LOOSIN’ ALL MY COOL) -KOOK X READER | JIMIN X READER (SMUT) FT- YOONGI & TAE

About- Jimin and yourself take Jungkook shopping for a new suit to wear to the “Spectrum” launch party! OH, and Jimin fucks you in the backseat of your truck in the parking garage of the mall…..

OR: You know Kookie still in that “Broke college grad” phase only being with the company barley a month, and you don’t want him to feel self-conscious at the event! You’ve also been too busy to really check in with him to see how he’s adjusting! So, you thought something like this, in a more laxed atmosphere, would be a good solution! Oh and Jimin, honestly he’s just nosey as fuck and inched himself along, like nobody really invited him he invited his damn self! Also Jungook can’t underatand why the fuck your all so damn attractive...like...why!?

AKA-MEET JUNGKOOK JEON

SNEAK PEEK 

***

THE “FINAL” ONE-SHOT,  IS NOT FULLY OUTLINED YET

******

FINAL NOTE-

This series is open to request...for one-shot/ member scenarios/drabbles.

The initial 7 one-shots are done to get the dynamic and I guess you could say “Plot” set in stone...however, once that’s done and in-between I’m open to random scenarios as long as it somewhat coincides with the “Universe”

This is a story that follows normal day to day life in a sense....they just happen to live a very exciting one!

Anything from them going grocery shopping and making dinner...all the way to the OC and one of the boys fooling around on set...as long as it fits the vibe. I’m down!

   *** To clarify as well...publicly ( And in the workplace) the world just knows your married to Namjoon....the whole poly situation is not something blasted on your Wiki...at least not yet....***

(Optional)

***POSTIONS’S WITHIN THE COMPANY*** 

(Obv things are spread out now and they have other employees but they all STILL oversee multiple jobs...It’s a habit now. For so many years they couldn’t afford the help! So, now that they can they’ve just become a little...protective of said job duties..) 

Y/n Kim(26)- CEO/Founder/HR/Storyboard/Content  creator/Directory/Scriptwriter/Talent scout/ALL OF THE ABOVE (Set design, DVD author, 2nd Location manager, etc)   

Namjoon Kim (26)- CEO/ Founder/ Director/ Content analyst/ Lead scriptwriter/ Sr Production manger/ ALL OF THE ABOVE (IT, web design, outreach, etc)

Yoongi Min (27)- Head digital producer/ Program/site Planner/Production manager/Sound engineer/Production scheduler

Taehyung Kim (24)-Executive Assistant/ Content admin/ location manager/Wardrobe assistant/backup talent scout & health liaison

Seokjin Kim (28)- Senior Accountant/ Sales manager/ Financial controller/Logistics/Operations

Jimin Park (25)- Head talent scout/ Model Liaison/ Wardrobe/ Hair & Makeup coordinator/ Onset assistant/Health Liaison

Hoseok Jung (26)- Social media/ Streaming manager/Tactical marketer/ Advertising/event manager/PR

NOW HIRING: FOR A VIDEO EDITOR/IMAGE PROCESSOR/SOUND EDITOR/SECONDARY PHOTOGRAPHER AKA-

 “PRODUCTION COORDINATOR“

....WELCOME TO ONYX!

[luvargas]

     i think i just saw LUCILA “ LU ” VARGAS ride by on a golf cart . at least i think it was her . after all , CREDIT IN THE STRAIGHT WORLD BY HOLE was blasting on the transistor radio . maybe she was on her way to work , i hear she’s a PERSONAL TRAINER . but she totally could have been on her way to SNEAK IN A SMOKE AT THE GARDEN . guess we’ll never know . you’ll definitely know its her when you see LOOSE AND TANGLED HAND WRAPS , BUTTON BADGES ON VEGAN LEATHER ,  AND HEAR THE SHRILL SOUND OF BICKERING around the country club . let’s just hope she stays off the green after hours or else the sprinklers will get her !

( new muse, messy thoughts, u get the gist. pls know the views of this chara do not reflect my own. the name’s katya, 21, she/her pronouns & im ready 2 party. feel free to hmu wnvr or drop a like to plot n ill com 2 u ! x — oh n pls be a pal n read this quick disclaimer. tysm ! )

BASICS

24 years old

15 april 1997

5′1″ or 1.55m tall

bisexual cis woman, she/her

aries sun, aqua moon, and aqua rising

love languages : quality time & acts of service

BIO POINTS

kid o’ divorce, lived w her ma in chicago til she was 6 then w her dad in highlands til 14 then back to her ma ! 

def a daddys gorl. so used to her white pop’s leniency that livin w her strict latina ma durin her teen yrs was So Not Her Vibe ergo * cue her rebel grrrl phase *

did not finish hs ! left senior yr 2 to go w her “ radically progressive ” college bf to [ insert dev country. ] they broke up after a few mos but she kept at that life for a couple more yrs

seen some places. lived in new countries. done some shit. some good, some sus, but all generally well-intentioned. tis a whole thing but u get the gist, nywy !

lu’s back in da usa by 21. rel w the ma is strained but the pa is chill w stuff, they kept in touch. he said shell get her college fund if she gets her ged so she does !

her dad is v active n stuff so shes just always been v sporty w him. lu turnin 23 w zilch plans worried him so he implored her to get certified as a personal trainer ! n when she did, he called in a few favors w a pal he knows et voilà ! ur hired.

LU AT WORK

shes been workin at the country club fr a little over a yr now. most her clients are influencer-type gals n they luv her bc shes can take rlly cute pics n stuff for content. lu sorta likes some of em n she fakes the rest for the bread. u can bet she clowns all em richies behind their back   

unless she got clients, catch her runnin’ about the club n minglin’ w the other workers. does it annoy mngmt ? yes. n she luvs that. but bc her soon-2-b-karen clients luv her n wont stand for her bein booted, she can milk that impunity

actually knows her shit n lowkey rlly enjoys the work. she picked back up the boxing n tae kwon do she did when she was younger plus she was always in the track team at school. v healthy lifestyle save for her smokin vice n the party moments

PERSONALITY 

passionate ! has lotsa opinions. helluva a drama queen, bit of a loud mouth, argumentative n stubborn but her heart’s in the right place, albeit a lil misguided. comes w the whole activist bit, bitin her tongue just aint it. highkey makes everythin political n smtms gotta realize .,.,. it just aint that deep chief. some say shes needlessly defiant, but maybe thats a in the beholder typa thing ? fingers crossed 4 lu’s sake

fun, fun, fun ! can be real naggy but shes no buzzkill. wannabe anarchist-slash-mutineer who wants 2 stick it 2 the man ! get rowdy go crazy

fight, fight, fight ! goin back to the first bit, she talks big. esp w like ,, men n the whites lol. she can actually walk her threats tho she isnt actually violent. w arguments, she likes to start em but finishin is ... ruff.  also any dare, she wont back down in either doin it or arguin why doin it wld be smth-ist. shes not the sharpest tool ok rip lu

loyal legend ! fr her friends n buds, shell turn a blind eye. pals r the only exception ! truly ride or die n will do errthng 4 em. v much a believer in the power of community n ppl needin ppl or wtvr, yk, all that stuff. shes mouthy but like, she helps ppl 

here’s a brief blurb n a more coherent look into lu as a character

TIDBITS

lu can understand spanish but hers is a bit broken, tis her secret shame shhh

she doesn’t believe in the institution. any institution. u name it, shes got beef

pls dont fact check her she cant hear u

probs lowkey thinks shes better than u bc shes vegan

prefers 2 be called “ lu ” n ny1 who insists on lucila is dead 2 her 

comments abt her not lookin like a pt w her height n frame will result in an earful n a dramatic outburst. it aint worth it chief

watches lotsa sports w her pops. mostly indiv ones. mma, boxing, tennis, track, etc

dont ask me abt her principles n politics, i cant explain em either. v inconsistent n just messy at this point tbh but here’s a lil attempt ig

she drives a 2018 prius n lives in a p nice 1br apt outside the club

her mom’s middle class n her dad is almost upper-middle class. he isnt a member of the club but, like ,,, he cld be if he wanted to lol. he spoils her sm while she hasnt rlly Spoken to her mom besides civility, rip they both stubborn, tis a vargas thing

she is v much in a comfy position money-wise n dsnt hav much Need to hustle but sis does hav a couple of organizations she regularly sends some dough to so thats nice ig

she went fr grassroots activist to a veteran twitter/tumblr/reddit/wtvr ranter n a change.org gofundme petition regular. is it burnout ? is she ok ? honestly who knows

WANTED CONNECTIONS / TAKEN CONNECTIONS

found family ! pals n squad wanted. y’all gotta hav patience or ear plugs to power thru her self-indulgent mini-rants but shell luv ya back tenfold !

carpool buds ? cld be a pal ! or maybe yall had a lil argument or small beef but lu still drives ym bc her pride ? said mother earth first even tho the tension n silly drama is funny 

homies to smoochies ! just sum nsa makin out. cld be pals, cld be flirty, idk, but if u wanna kiss her shes probs ok w that

smoke bud ! just sum1 thats her go-to 2 smoke w on her breaks. knows not to call her out on how its not healthy fr a trainer yada yada she knows ok. let her live

an ex ? idk yet shes not rlly datey but thats out there

crushes ! this bitch hot but does she know how to flirt ? not rlly. watch her fumble

debate club ! aka sum1 she bickers w relentlessly. its valid, sum1 fite her. r u a worker or a club member ? either works. its a whole club bc she can have tons, lu can be hella annoying n testy

clients ! self-explanatory. do they get along tho ? lets find out ! 

( im officially braindead now but if y’all got more ideas or think theres smth lu wld fit just lmk !!! down 4 wtvr, wld luv 2 hash it out w yall <3 ) 

[the-writer-is-always-write]

Tips and Tricks Every College Freshman Should Know:

1) On your first day of classes, get there 5-10 minutes early. This will give you plenty of time to find the classroom and pick your ideal spot without fighting a crowd. 

2) Try to make at least two friends in every class, even your gen-ed courses. Talk to the people who sit near you on the first day! Exchange numbers if you can, maybe even form a study group for big tests and exams. It may seem intimidating, especially if you’re shy or introverted, but having someone you know can make even the worst classes just a little bit better. 

3) Ask questions! If you don’t understand something, ask!! If you’re too shy or uncomfortable to ask during class, talk to your professor afterwards or shoot them an email later that day. If you have a good professor, they should be more than happy to answer any questions you have. 

4) Make friends with upperclassmen! Especially those that are in your major/department. They can steer you towards the best classes and professors, give you advice, and help you avoid mistakes that they made when they were in your shoes. 

5) Make friends outside of your major/department. As fun as it is to hang out with people who have all or most of the same interests as you, it can be relieving and even fun to hang out with people who have different goals, interests, and passions. 

6) Make friends with the professors in your department! This can be difficult if you go to a bigger school, but always put in the effort to make yourself known. Chat with them before or after classes. Make it clear you’re trying to do well. If you want life or career advice, ask to meet a trusted professor for coffee or lunch.

7) Most professors don’t care if you eat or drink in class. Stay hydrated with water, tea, or coffee, and keep some protein bars, nuts or fruit in your backpack.

8) Prioritize your classes and study-time. Ultimately, you’re not paying to make friends and party, you’re paying to get a degree. The courses you’re taking for your major should always come first, unless there’s a particularly difficult gen-ed class that you’re struggling with. 

9) Also make time for fun. Although your studies should come first, it’s okay to take a break and relax. Go see a movie, run to wal-mart, go out to eat, or just stay in and have a game night with some friends. 

10) Eating 3 meals a day can do a lot in terms of keeping you energized and focused during classes and studying. Even if you can’t do it every day, try to get 3 meals as often as you can. If you have to skip a meal here and there for exams/work/etc., be sure to pack some extra snacks in your backpack. 

11) Try not to take naps unless you absolutely need to. Taking frequent naps can disrupt your circadian rhythm and leave you feeling lethargic, unmotivated, and unable to focus during classes or study-time. 

12) If you can, schedule your classes back-to-back. Having classes that are spaced out across the whole day with an hour or two in between can be irritating, and leave little time for studying and being productive. 

13) Avoid 8am classes, but remember that the earlier you get out, the more time you have for studying and hanging out with friends. 

14) Thriftbooks is going to be your best friend for buying textbooks. Never pay full price. Ever. 

15) If you’re living on campus with a roommate, try to leave them nice little notes from time to time. It’s a good way to brighten their day, and it can make you feel better too. 

16) You’re roommate doesn’t have to be your best friend, but at the end of the day they are the person that you’re living with and you should prioritize them as such. 

17) Write letters!! Write to family members, friends from home, friends at other colleges, or even friends at your college. 

18) If you’re struggling with a class, get help! Ask a friend who’s in the same class, reach out to someone who’s already taken it, look into tutoring options on campus, or meet with your professor. 

19) College isn’t as glamorous or dramatic as the entertainment industry makes it out to be. Your room will be small, the cafeteria food will be dismal, and there will be days when you go to class looking like garbage. And that’s okay. You don’t have to have it all together 24/7. 

20) Read this one carefully, and then read it again: Failing an assignment, a test, or even a class does not mean that you have failed at college or at life. Having a mental/emotional breakdown due to stress does not mean that you have failed at college or at life. Missing a class, meal, or assignment due to your mental health does not mean that you have failed at college or at life. Have a good cry if you need to, then pick yourself back up again and carry on to the best of your ability.

21) If your mental health is in a serious decline because of the college environment, get help! Talk to an RA, a trusted friend, or even a staff member. Look into school counseling services and see what might be available. Most importantly, consider the option that college may not be right for you. Not everyone is built for college, and that’s okay. There are plenty of jobs and career fields that don’t require a college degree. If your family is pressuring you to stay in school, remind them that your mental health and well-being was, is, and always shall be more important than a piece of paper from an overpriced university. 

(Feel free to add on!)

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #308

“you don’t need treats, and you don’t need tricks, and you don’t need me.”

Middle name? Marie. Or Marie Catherine, if we're technical, but as someone who loooong left Catholicism and never even agreed with many aspects of it in the first place, I don't like to include it. If you're confused, there's a ceremony called Confirmation, and while I honestly don't even remember the details of it, you adopt the name of a saint you want to stand for, kinda. I chose Catherine just because I liked the name outta my other options. Democrat/republican/other? I classify myself as Independent because I really don't relate well enough to either, but I do know I'm becoming more and more liberal with time. Do you dress according to your mood? My mood? No. I dress with what I feel like wearing at that time, but my actual mood has nothing to do with it. Are you good at doing hair/make up? No. Are you always worried or stressed about something? 24/7, my friend. Can you swim? Yeah. Are you afraid of needles? I don't like them, but I'm not afraid of them. How many kids do you want? Zero. Long/short nails? I keep mine short. Do you like wearing hats? No. Does mall Santa Clauses or Easter bunnies freak you out? Nah, I loved seeing Santa as a kid. :') Would you consider yourself clumsy? I am RIDICULOUSLY clumsy. Do you like when a guy picks you up in his arms? In concept, but I ain't easy to pick up anymore lmao. Do you like hairless cats? I do!! Females, anyway, for... obvious reasons lol. Not having fur makes some things waaay too ~obvious~ otherwise. I would love a sphynx. Do you like the color yellow? No; it's actually one of my most disliked colors. Have you ever seen a cat have a hairball? Yeah. Have you ever had a tooth pulled? Not by a dentist, no, just by myself as a kid when I was losing my baby teeth. When someone says don’t look do you look? It depends on why they're telling me to not look. Have you ever played spin the bottle? No. If you had to name three important details about you, what would you say? I'm a very emotional person, I need a lot of "me" time, and to be aware of my social anxiety so not every interaction I have is perceived as just a dumpster fire. What are your three biggest insecurities? My creativity, my goddamn body, and my lack of social skills. If you could write anonymous letters to three people, who would you send it to and what would you say? Ummm. I can only think of people I miss and don't WANT to be anonymous... Favorite photo of yourself? A senior prom picture I don't have anymore. I looked so, so happy and fuck my low self-esteem, gorgeous. Who are you disappointed with right now? I'm like, permanently disappointed in myself lol. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now? No. My minimum is 21. What question do you hate to answer? "Are you a virgin?" because it's just a confusing answer. It doesn't sound like one at all, but trust me on this. The subject of sex just makes me uncomfortable anyway, so even if I was confident in the answer, I wouldn't want to talk about it. What’s your most listened to song? I don't have a way of actually finding that out, but I'd say I've been listening to "ULTRAnumb" by Blue Stahli quite a lot lately. If you were a performing artist, what would you title your first album? I mean, I don't know. It would depend on what was going on in my life and head at the time. If someone told you you could give one person a present and your budget was unlimited–what present would you get and for whom? A nice car for Mom. She's had the same shitty car for yeeeeeaaaaarrrrrssssss now because she just can't afford a new one; hell, this one was free. A dance friend hit a deer, so the front of the car is messed up, and she bought a new one, but because the car itself was still functional, she gave it to my mom. Mom is so loved at the studio. The car just has various issues by this point, like trouble starting, accelerating, it's bumpy, etc., so it's way past time for a new one. Do you like licorice? NOOOOOOOOOO that's a big 'ole "ew." Have you ever visited your country’s capital city? No, but I've seen it from a distance when riding up to NY. When was the last time you were outdoors for over an hour? WOW. I couldn't even try to guess. What is the shortest amount of time you’ve lived somewhere? The house I was born into. I actually don't know how long Mom and Dad lived there, but I was only in that house as a very little baby. I have zero memories of it. What’s your favorite kind of mint? (Peppermint/wintergreen/spearmint/etc.) ... There's a difference? lol I guess peppermint? What was the last thing to frustrate you? I wanted to draw yesterday, but I didn't know what to draw to even get started. Have you ever been to a bachelor or bachelorette party? No. Did any of your family members serve in WWII? I don't believe so? Well... maybe my grampa did? I don't remember. What’s your favorite kind of salad? Gimme an Olive Garden salad and I will deadass eat the whole bowl. Are you more realistic or idealistic? I'd say I'm more realistic with most things. Are you currently borrowing something from someone? No. Is anyone currently borrowing anything from you? No. What is your last name’s heritage/country of origin? Ireland. When did you last buy a new pair of shoes? What kind? I got new flipflops a year or so back because my old Rainbows were so worn out and blackened my feet. Have you ever experienced culture shock while traveling? If so, where? No. Are you able to see the stars at night where you live? I actually haven't checked since moving here. We're in the suburbs though, so it's questionable. Do you include your middle initial in your signature? Not unless it's required, usually. I think. When's the last time I physically signed anything, anyway? What brand of computer do you have? It's an Acer Nitro. What operating system does that computer run? Windows 10. What’s the oldest piece of clothing that you still own and wear? I don't really know, given how much my weight has fluctuated. Went drastically up, went down, now it's back up. .-. I still own a handful of shirts I want to "shrink back into" from late HS and early college times, but yeah, I don't know if I'll actually achieve that. Is the area in which you live flat, hilly, or mountainous? Flat as my ass. What is your significant other or best friend’s ring tone? No one on my phone has a "special" ringtone. Where do you keep your hair brush? There's a comb I use in a drawer in the bathroom. Which pair of shoes have you owned the longest? Multiple pairs of Converse, also from high school. When’s the last time you were sick at the same time as someone else? I'm very happy to say I don't even recall the last time I was sick. My immune system is the fuckin GOAT. What did you have for breakfast this morning? A pb&j. We've got very little rn, but thankfully Mom's picking up our Wal-Mart order today. Last time you were in pain? If I'm standing, you can bet my legs hurt, so. What color is your mom’s hair? It's growing back totally gray now. Is that also your hair color? Well, no, I'm only 25. Do you watch any daily vloggers on YouTube? Who? No. I watch people who vlog occasionally, but not regularly. It's gotta be people I'm very into to really be interested in vlogs. What room of your house do you usually do your surveys in? Sigh, I'm always in my bedroom. Really hoping Mom and I muster up the motivation to clean up the extra room soon to turn it into my "dayroom" or "office," if you will. What do you put on your tacos? I hate tacos. What is your favorite stuffed animal and where did you get it? I have a bittersweet connection to the adorable plush meerkat Jason gave me for Valentine's our first year together; I always slept with it when we were together by apart, and for a year or so after the breakup. It was a source of comfort for me, so I'm really fond of it. Fella's fur is so worn out and matted down with age and lots of love. He's on my dresser now, towards the front of all my plushies. Last thing you hung up on your wall? My Illidan poster, I believe. Do you have a full length mirror? Yeah, on the back of my door. Is it currently raining? No, finally. It's been raining for like a fuckin week, it seems like. It's finally a clear day. It's nice to hear birds outside. Does anyone you live with talk in their sleep? Does this happen often? I'M the one doing the talking/screaming in my sleep. Thanks, nightmares. When was the last time you cried, or felt tearful? I'm not positive, but I know I had a pretty rough PTSD night not too long ago where I teared up. Did you wake up with a song stuck in your head today? What was it? Ohhh yes; I've been listening to Mother Mother's "Ghosting" on repeat because it's jammed up there. When was the last time you used moisturiser or lotion of some kind? Not too long ago on my hands. They get dry this time of year, and besides, I wash my hands a lot nowadays especially. What was the last thing you owned, that was accidentally broken or damaged? Were you able to get it fixed? My laptop, and yes. Tell me about the last dream you recall having. Was it weird, amusing, etc. So this is pretty wild. I know I had a nightmare last night, but I don't remember it; the night before, however, I had a nightmare about a possibly rabid and ginormous rat (I mean like, smaller dog sized) in the house and trying to bite me. It was SUPER weird, because I was actually afraid of it, yet I absolutely adore rats in real life. What was the last video you watched on YouTube? I've really gotten into John Wolfe (a let's player) lately, and I'm going through his The Evil Within playthrough. Do your parents use any social media at all? My mom has a Facebook, and hilariously, Dad has a Snapchat to talk with my sister Nicole. He has no clue what he's doing with it and it's adorable, haha. Mom also has a Twitter, but she doesn't use it. Is there anyone in your life who regularly asks how your day has been? Regularly, no. I've always been that person, especially in the WoW guild I'm in. I'm very close and comfortable with them and ask how everyone's doing any time I log on. Lovely people who give me some social interaction every day. Tell me something positive about the day you've had. It's still early, but once again, it's pretty and bright outside. Why do you prefer Facebook over MySpace, because I know you do? Ha, you'd be incorrect. MySpace was more personal, so I actually preferred it. But it's obviously long-dead, so I just settle with Facebook. Have you read the Pretty Little Liars series? No. My sister looooves it, though. What product do you use to moisturize your lips? I don't remember, actually... It's in my purse somewhere. When did you start using Xanga? I never have. Be honest, do you judge people on their appearance? Judge, I don't think so. I can make assumptions like everyone else, but I'm not gonna think someone is beneath me just by their attire. Do you know anyone who does not like The Beatles? Me. At least, most songs. "Hey Jude" is good, but everyone agrees with that, haha. Did you have a friend in middle school that you’re now enemies with in high school? I'm long since out of HS. I had a middle school friend who I disconnected with following a fight in high school, but we weren't "enemies," and we reunited our senior year anyway. Aaaaand we're not friends anymore once again lmao. What is one thing you hope your children don’t inherit from you? If I hypothetically wanted kids, God knows I'd hope they wouldn't have my psychological issues. Do you think you’ll be married in 10 years? It'd be nice, anyway. What type of foundation do you wear? None. Who’s the most controlling person you know? Someone I'm no longer friends with, partially because of this. Do males look good in skinny jeans? Yep. Are you for or against guyliner? Ugggghhhhh guyliner makes me weak in the knees. How many jobs have you had? Where do you currently work? Three; nowhere. Who did you last hit? Um, nobody??? What way of self-care do you enjoy the most and what feels more like an obligation? I enjoy my alone time on the computer as the best self-care, especially after being social all day; I don't, however, enjoy the act of performing hygiene care. I still do it, it's just not fun. The feeling afterwards is great, though. Have you ever tried specific diet plans or fads? What made you do it and how did it turn out for you? I was briefly using NutriSystem, which didn't work for me. I hated too much of the food. More recently I stuck with flexible dieting and calorie counting for a while, but I drifted from it when I still lost no fucking weight in like a month. I want to get back to it, though... oh, and intermittent fasting. I don't think it really worked for me yet again, even though I did it correctly, but that and the aforementioned flexible dieting is all I feel like I can handle. I guess I just have to give it longer. Do you know anyone who has been directly affected by COVID-19 e.g. testing positive, losing a loved one, or their job due to the pandemic? Too many people I know have had it or had someone they loved die because of it. Take this shit seriously. Is there a kind of music you only prefer listening to during specific type of activities that you otherwise wouldn’t enjoy under normal circumstances (e.g. EDM while doing sports or instrumental music while studying, etc.)? No; I have to actually enjoy the music. If you had to start a YouTube channel and motivations/skills/resources/any other inhibiting factors weren’t an issue, what would it be about? Either animal (preferrably reptiles) education or let's plays, ig. Has anything ever happened to you that if you told someone about, they would think you’re making it up? I don't believe so. What travel destination or popular spot have you been to that you found overrated? What about a lesser known place that you thought was a hidden gem? I really don't know; I haven't traveled nearly enough for this.

[bondsmagii]

I mean to ask this genuinely, no hostility, but can you explain how you correlate scp to being in a cult? I dont disagree, I just cant articulate the reasoning as to why I dont disagree, and would like to see where youre coming from with this. Also, could you tag it with cults or cult discussion or something similar, please? Thanks! Have a good day.

OK [cracks knuckles] I will try and keep this as short as possible, but you have to understand I’ve been observing the wiki in the wild literally since its inception, so there is a lot of stuff to consider. anyway let’s buckle up.

[EDIT: after finishing, this is obnoxiously long. sorry. I encourage people to read it though, because yikes.]

I base this theory on a set of guidelines set out for spotting if an organisation might be a cult. generally cults are religiously based; obviously this does not apply here. as far as I’m aware, nobody sees the SCP wiki as a religion (yet). because of this a couple of the points regarding spotting a cult are irrelevant (they concern things like separation from the Church which obviously doesn’t apply) but nearly all of the others (even some religious ones) can apply if we provide context. so without further ado:

Signs You’re In A Cult and How the SCP Wiki Literally Fits Into All of Them

let’s start with the most obvious:

opposing critical thinking

something that has long pissed me off about the SCP wiki has been its complete inability to think critically. staff will literally ban people for criticising them, and the parameters of “criticism” have only grown wider and wider over the years. anything that is the “party line” is sacred; nothing can be improved upon because it’s already perfect, and Staff Knows Best. any policy changes are law, and any dissenting voices are silenced – even among younger staff members (length of service wise, not age wise). I have seen staff put on probation or demoted for arguing against pointless or pedantic policy changes; I have seen people of all levels banned for arguing with staff. if this doesn’t happen right away, arguing with staff over their decisions will absolutely get a target on your back, and they will find a way to ban or demote you as soon as they can.

any criticism on the wiki is frowned upon unless it comes from the Major Staff Members – these are people at the top of the hierarchy who can do no wrong, and as you can imagine, they’ve done some shit. staff has always had a problem with elitism, bullying, and even abusive behaviour (blah blah blah #NotAllStaff, but the ratio is quite concerning) and any criticism of their behaviour or even pointing this fact out is dangerous if you want to remain on the wiki. hell, I know many people who are aware of this who don’t speak up because they’re genuinely scared of retaliation. a lot of staff are really nasty people, and because of this attitude they are beyond criticism.

isolating members and penalising them for leaving

the penalising them for leaving part isn’t strictly accurate, because as far as I know, nobody has ever been bullied or threatened into staying on the wiki. however, I do remember a while back (2011/2012-ish) when the Foundation RP community began to show up on Tumblr, and the wiki began to get a fanbase that wasn’t contained on the site itself. staff were not happy about this and to this day they still constantly try and get a monopoly on all off-site locations. they have an official Offsite Outreach Team (yes, that’s its real name) who “reach out” to communities on other platforms (YouTube, Reddit, Tumblr, etc) and set up an Official Presence there, and then they encourage everyone to use the Official Presence rather than the fan-made ones (which are often more established and better/more consistently run). there have been several off-site spats between staff and the fandom, because they arrive demanding the authority and respect they have on the wiki and get Big Mad when they don’t get it. just recently one (now ex) staff member, djkaktus, went absolutely primal on Reddit and banned a whole bunch of the community for daring to say that they didn’t like the new LGBT logo for pride month (many of these people were LGBT themselves and felt as though it was pandering/putting targets on their backs); several more years ago (2014, I believe?) I myself had a run in with the Outreach Team and it was one fucking hell of a headache that ended in a malicious smear campaign against me, so like. yeah.

as for isolating members, they do this via elitism. the above is an example of it (making everyone feel a sense of obligation or loyalty to the Official Presence), but a huge part of it has always been the elitist attitude prevalent on the wiki. the SCP wiki has high standards for writing (allegedly… I’ve seen some garbage on there tbh, same as any other website) and it uses this to bully and demean its users. criticism of writing is overly harsh but highly encouraged; anyone complaining that it was too cruel (which it often is) is ridiculed for being too sensitive. (staff have been working on this for years, but really nothing has changed; people have just gotten more between-the-lines about it.) this encourages a kind of desperation among new users to “rise up the ranks” and earn respect so they can be the ones dishing out the criticism instead; they will do so and then immediately act in accordance to their status, bullying others how they were bullied and sticking to their own “rank”. brief interruption: staff and bootlickers if you’re reading this and thinking of reblogging to defend yourself, the code word is yeet. if I do not see the word yeet in your reply I will know you have not read this thoroughly and tell me why I should then bother reading anything you have to say.staff themselves is incredibly removed and closed off from the rest of the community; they have a bunch of private chat rooms they hang out in, and inter-dating is common. they don’t tend to interact much outside the flock, and are the definition of cliquey. joining this rank is supposed to be an achievement, but really it’s probably the most dangerous place to be. I have seen so many staff members have literal, clinical mental breakdowns over the strain and treatment they suffer.

(there’s nowhere to neatly slot this in, so: I don’t know how many people have noticed this, but SCP fans, when you spot them on other platforms, are snooty. not casual fans, but those involved with the wiki? I can spot them from a mile away, because whenever the Foundation is mentioned, there they are, acting like they’re part of some cool club. some of these people are innocent (they’re just mimicking the behaviour of other members) but some of them really do seem to think that their site is somehow better than whatever site they’re on, and it’s really creepy to see.)

emphasising special doctrines outside of scripture

obviously this is religion-specific, but with context it can fit. if we take scripture to mean SCP lore, and special doctrines to mean differing headcanons, ideas, writing styles, etc… oh boy.

there’s something that’s often said on the wiki: there is no canon. buddy, there is. yes, you can write whatever you want technically, and you can disregard headcanons you don’t like and you can build on different things and theoretically people can just ignore your shit if they don’t like it, but that is not what happens. there is absolutely a canon, and deviating from it will get you downvoted into oblivion and even personally attacked. people will accuse you of the most ridiculous shit, like desecrating the wiki or betraying the universe or whatever. so where does the emphasising part of this come in?

why, it’s simple! if one of these special doctrines (headcanons or whatever) comes from staff or an Approved Member, it’s fine. go nuts. even if it’s something that anybody else would be absolutely slaughtered for, it’s fine if staff approves. there is no creative freedom on that wiki, and anyone attempting to carve a piece out for themselves will suffer for it. one of my close friends still gets hate for an SCP he wrote featuring heavy headcanons and building on existing lore about a well-known character, and some of this hate is because he didn’t set the fucking article out “how it should be”. 

seeking inappropriate loyalty to their leaders

oh boy. staff are god on that website. they’ll deny it, but they know it’s true. many of them are arrogant and, in my opinion, some of them are pathologically narcissistic. they think they are hot shit, and they encourage people on the site to believe the same. a huge majority of users on the wiki are high school students, so 15-18 years old. the next huge group are college-aged, so 19-22 or so. several staff members are in their mid-20s up to 30s, maybe even coming 40s or early 40s now. when you’re in your mid-20s, it’s very easy to look cool to a 15-year-old. it’s very easy to look at a young userbase and convince them that you’re hot shit, and that’s what staff do. they act like it; most users respond to it, and if anyone dissents? see point one.

staff have always had double standards. from the very beginning of staff, they have gotten away with a lot more than the average user. staff have been allowed to bully, ridicule, harass, dismiss, shit upon, and target people with reckless abandon, usually only meeting punishment when other staff members feel too inconvenienced by them. a lot of the time when they’re punished, it’s a lot lighter than it would have been for an average user (a month ban rather than a permaban, for example). this is seen as almost a point of hilarity for a lot of people, who think it’s cool and just a right you get when you’re staff. you know best, you’ve seen some shit – who can blame you for slamdunking a 15-year-old’s first SCP?

the amount of respect and adoration these people demand is ridiculous, and anybody daring to criticise them ends up on a shitlist. staff show up in other areas (Tumblr or Reddit) and expect that same amount of respect, even among people outside of the wiki who might just be casual fans. they act a lot more important than they are, and demand that everyone treats them appropriately. I’ve seen staff members throw shitfits because they didn’t get enough upvotes for their articles, and many staff members’ quality of work declines when they make staff, simply because they know that they’ll get easy upvotes as soon as people realise it’s a staff member who wrote it. downvotes are enough to get you put on a shitlist. 

publicly, their word is law. you are not allowed to debate with them in the forums if they put a “stop” on the topic; the same applies in the IRC chat. if staff says “stop”, you will be punished if you mention it again. you are allowed to discuss it with them privately, but I think that’s rather insidious, as staff have been known to twist facts and withhold information before. this gives them a public persona of always being right – and something else that cults do is silence dissenting voices so nobody who might agree can see other people saying the same things and feel encouraged/emboldened. 

crossing Biblical boundaries of behaviour

again, we’ll need to contextualise this. if Biblical boundaries are things like sins and all the stuff the Bible says Do Not Do, then in this context these are the wiki rules. staff (and their friends) will constantly cross the rules, as previously mentioned, and they will get away with it.

the wiki rules say “don’t be a dick”. I have caught staff bullying people countless times, and no doubt there’s more I haven’t caught. even out in the open, staff are argumentative, dismissive, rude, intimidating, and oftentimes plain nasty. the wiki rules say “don’t coldpost articles; get feedback”. staff is just out there throwing their shit onto the wiki and expecting an avalanche of upvotes in five minutes Or Else. policies are made that set parameters and staff changes them whenever convenient – for example, the long-standing rule that things that occur off-site are not the responsibility of the Disciplinary Committee (yes, its name.). unless, of course, it’s someone they don’t like. a major staff member bullies somebody on Tumblr? “sorry, it was offsite, not our problem”. someone staff doesn’t like gets into a brief spat on Reddit? banned for harassment. 

there are countless examples of this, from small things to major things like bullying, harassment, and even abuse (or enabling of abuse). staff will punish people for transgressions and then turn a blind eye to a fellow staff member committing a transgression that was ten times worse. they have even protected rapists and sexual predators in the past – another kind of behaviour common in cults, because that’s what happens when you combine narcissism and entitlement with total authority.

that’s the main bulk of it

but now the context has been established, here are a few more concerning things I’ve noticed (quickfire now):

cults shit on former members

and the wiki does the same. any staff member that’s grown fed up of the groupthink and the cliquey attitude and how nasty people are or who has been mistreated by staff themselves; any regular user who feels the same and vocally quits? shat upon. lauded as a bastion of whatever is wrong with the wiki. declared an Enemy and rallied against. it is so creepy.

cults use Us vs Them mentality, especially in language

broad declarations establishing a community and a community spirit in the face of adversity are common in cults. appeals to emotion and loyalty are used in a very manipulative way. catastrophising and fearmongering is common, too. I’m seeing this in how the recent drama with the legal issues is being handled. broad appeals to “defend the wiki”, hashtags being encouraged, emotional speeches from staff about how it’s a make or break situation… 

…and this is being reflected in the absolutely insane comments people are responding with.

this is a fucking writing website. the above is not a normal reaction at all.

the attitudes of regular users quickly grow concerning

people very quickly get obsessed with the wiki and it defines their lives. they seem to feel as though they owe something to it or they need to serve some kind of a purpose; many people try and “get the word out” and become voluntary spokespeople. they go around practically preaching, and I do not see the users of any other website doing this.

cults want full control over how they’re seen by outsiders

and the scp wiki does the same. as mentioned previously, when the fandom grew and spiralled off the wiki to other sites, staff debated for weeks over what to do. brief interruption the second code is shrek is life.they were not comfortable with the idea of the wiki having an independent fandom, and for years now they have been in constant struggle with offsite communities, trying to gain the same amount of control they have over the wiki. it’s impossible to do so thoroughly, and it’s clearly an annoyance for them.

cult leaders will let “lesser” members do their dirty work for them

and guess what staff does? rather than wade in there and get their hands dirty with internet arguments, they’ll sit back and let regular users dogpile on dissenters and say all the things staff shouldn’t be seen to say in public. note how even if this would violate the bullying policies, they’ll just get a warning so long as staff agrees. 

in conclusion

@ everyone on the scp wiki: yall know you’re in a cult, right?

[nathanielbeaumont]

「george sear & trans male」⇾ beaumont, nathaniel, the senior radcliffe student’s records show that he is a capricorn and 22 years old. he is studying mathematics, living in gorham and can be sociable, dedicated, insincere & temperamental. when i see him. i am reminded of smoke drifting off a bonfire, hair still wet after a shower & running shoes with the treads worn off.  ⇽「drew & 22 & est & he/him.」

trivia.

plays on radcliffe’s handball team - but will never actually tell you that, instead claiming to be a member of some other, even more obscure team. has misdirected people that express interest in going to one of his games and is generally an ass about it.

will answer to any version of his name - nate, nat, nathan, than, neil - he’s heard every nickname in the book and so long is you’re obviously talking to him, he won’t ignore you outright. unless he’s in a sour mood and then it’s nathaniel or bust.

splits his time outside of class & practice in three equal parts for sleeping, studying and socializing aka partying. everything else is rushed to fit into five minute periods between the aforementioned activities.

nathaniel didn’t inherit his mother’s ability to destroy someone without ever sounding anything less than sweet, or even his father’s stony silence. he’s a storm hidden a sunny disposition, ready to swap from the amicable friend to a snarky attacker at a moment’s notice. he’ll make disparaging comments, aiming for any sign of weakness and letting loose --- most of the time, he comes around later and apologizes but the damage is already done. he’s still learning to hold his tongue, to ask questions first and act second.

generally someone that tries to do good by others --- he’ll give you the last beer at a party, he’ll walk you back to your dorm when you’re stumbling, he’ll even help you work out the math for your assignment --- but not always, there are times where he’s like ‘fuck i want this beer tho’ or ‘i don’t have time to help you’, because at the end of the day, he’s still his first priority.

lies about little things, not usually for malicious reasons but just because the truth might take longer to explain. will tell you a color is his favourite to skip the argument over the fact that he doesn’t have one. tries to avoid unnecessary confrontation and will lie about things to do it if he thinks he can get away with it.

born january 19th. 

a fan of coca-cola and doesn’t want to hear about how bad the sugar is for him. like fruit-flavoured chocolates. food sins galore, honestly. 

backstory.

the beaumont family is picture perfect in the same way that a green lawn is --- beautiful and lush until you look closer and realize that it’s all astro-turf. with a father whose job was described only as ‘special ops’ and a mother who worked as a high-end event planner, nathaniel should never have had to want for anything. except he did, quietly begging to trade pageants for sports --- a trophy of one kind morphing into one of another kind.

his mother eventually relented with a frown, displeased with her child’s lack of desire to follow in her footsteps but trying to support him regardless. this support continued even when he came out and began transitioning, sparkling eyes daring anyone to make a snide comment with an expression that promised swift correction. his father was less direct in his support but nathaniel could see it in the way that his eyes crinkled when his family made even a slightly untoward comment.

and for all of the support, for all of the wins that his high school teams managed, nathaniel found himself with a single scholarship offer for a sport that he had only ever played in a rec league. handball wasn’t a sport that had been meant to be his future, despite the recruiter’s insistence that his talent meant that he could be a major player in riving the sport stateside. despite a general disinterest in the game, he accepted the offer and made his way to radcliffe, on the condition that his face wouldn’t be on any promotional material around campus. ( online has always been fair game however )

connections.

tutor. listen i read a book with college athletes once where they had mandatory peer tutoring that they had to participate in and i just think that’s fun. nathaniel does well in all of his core classes, but struggles with all the gen ed courses that he put off doing until now - so maybe your character is stuck helping him through one of those. results may vary.

roommate / housemates. fellow gorham residents, i beg of u, give me some fun dynamics : positive, negative, neutral. would love some friends, or someone that is tired of nathaniel stumbling in and making a ruckus at 3 in the morning on weeknights or the many people who are like “stop leaving your jersey everywhere BEAUMONT”.

gym buddies. just people who spot each other or who run on treadmills next to each other - they don’t necessarily have to talk although if they did, i’m sure that nathaniel can offer up so controversial takes on sports for them to dissect over protein shakes / smoothies / whatever.

exes. nathaniel .... not necessarily a great boyfriend b/c he doesn’t want to commit to anyone like that and probably has ended a tonne of relationships b/c he was becoming too comfortable in them. hook-ups / ex-fwbs / summer flings are also all possibilities, as are currently flings/etc. 

[madzilla84]

hi i went through your ace tag and it was rlly comforting in a way. can i ask when u knew or how to deal (if its not to invasive!) thx

Hi anon! I’m glad you liked the posts - I know I can be pretty iffy at tagging so I’ll make sure to keep everything there if I can :)

It’s not invasive at all! The answer’s very long though, lol, because it’s me, so I put it under the read more.

I talked a bit about this in my post last year with the clumsy metaphor for my II denim jacket as sexuality, so if you read that then I might be repeating myself a bit, apologies.

The very short answer is that on some level I’ve always known, and I handled it Extremely Badly lmao. Don’t do what I did. Which was mostly nothing. XD

The longer, proper answer - I knew I was in some way Different when I found myself completely bewildered by the crushes my friends developed when we became tweens/teenagers. Like a lot of queer people, I selected my Pretend Crush and dutifully put up his poster in my locker (Noah Wyle from ER; I thought he had pretty eyes). I thought everyone else was just doing it to be cool, as well, in the same sort of way everyone pretended to love [insert name of popular band here] to save face at school.

But like, we got older, and people started making out and hooking up with Real Boys at parties, and still - I felt nothing. You’re a late bloomer, many people told me. I thought maybe I could be gay, if I had no attraction to men - but then I wasn’t attracted to women, either, so couldn’t be that. So what, then, I wondered? You can’t be nothing.

OR CAN YOU??? XD

I got to university-ish age, and around that time I went online and heard the term ‘asexual’ for the first time, and stumbled across AVEN; read the definition and thought, yep, that sounds very familiar. But the problem is, finding something out about yourself doesn’t mean you accept it, or like it, or even really believe it. I wondered then if it was actually a real thing, and not something someone on the internet had made up to make themselves feel better, because there was actually something wrong with them, and thus, with me?

I came home for Christmas during my first (only. lol whoops) year of college and brought up the subject with a small group of acquaintances at a New Years party (I’d had quite a bit to drink), and the reaction was - depressingly predictable.

That’s not a thing.

I can’t imagine that.

That sounds awful.

God, no sex? I’d rather be dead.

Have you even tried it? You need to try it.

That can’t be natural.

Okay, I get it, I thought, not bringing that up again.

And, the thing was, because I wasn’t in a relationship, or dating, or looking to, it was sort of - a non-subject. I had no prying family members asking about my love life. My true friends were unfazed by whatever I did or didn’t do (and still are, they’re good eggs), so it was just - something I never had to think about. In my mind, it was just another thing about me that made me weird and an outsider and that I didn’t belong anywhere or with anyone. (All not true! But that was then.)

And unfortunately it took me about 15 years to start to properly deal with it. Yikes. Such a long time - it’s not even about missed opportunities for dating because I’m still not looking to do that, but more about - accepting that it’s a real part of me and is okay and *good* actually and not just a peculiarity to avoid thinking about at all costs. Acceptance seemed unattainable, let alone the idea of being *proud* of it? Ha! Unthinkable. The best thing to do was just to - pretend it didn’t exist. Why poke that bruise, I thought?

I was always in this weird kind of limbo with the LGBT community - like, I felt on some level like I should be there? But at the same time, I felt like an outsider. (For many of the same reasons people to this day will tell you aces/aros don’t belong. All wrong.) I got really into queer films etc as a teen, I went to gay bars with friends and joined the uni LGBT society … and felt uncomfortable almost all the time. (I know *now* that’s because I was *still* trying to be something I wasn’t and wasn’t being honest with myself or anyone else, on any level. And a lot of the club nights we went to were basically about hooking up, which is fine and all but absolutely Not what I was looking for, and made me feel even more out of place. Why don’t I want to do that? What’s wrong with me?)

But fortunately, the world is quite a different place now, and I don’t think it’s quite so bad now for younger folks because people are talking about it *so* much more; there’s so much more help and support. And I know everyone bitches about social media but it didn’t exist when I was a teenager and there are so many ace/aro people and resources to connect with now!! We’re still made fun of almost constantly *at best* and excluded a ton and erased etc etc, but it *is* getting better. Even for us older folks still figuring it out. :)

I don’t mind admitting that Dan’s video was a huge help. (Albeit a very painful one. Part of why that video was so tough for me to watch, and still is, is that some of it hit a bit too close to home, you know? I didn’t experience the bullying he did, nor the fame, but many things were deeply recognisable.) That sort of tore the scab off (bit gross, sorry), whether I liked it or not, and made me look at it properly for the first time … well, ever, really. The period of time directly after that was - very raw, for me.

The phandom really helped, too; it’s a very accepting and welcoming community and there are actually lots of ace people! Which is awesome! Maybe I *am* a real person! ;)

So many little things helped too. I met a friend for lunch in January and she got me a glass ace flag pendant as a gift; I couldn’t believe it. I’ve felt able to bring it up with a few people outside my closest friends - eg. a couple of colleagues - and was heartened by their responses. I know they didn’t 100% get it, and that’s okay, but they were interested and open to listening and that meant a lot. I went to Pride last year and had a great time, and the first person who spoke to me there asked me where I got my ace pin. :_) (I’d been once before, in 2015, and I hated it; I felt uncomfortable and disingenuous and like I didn’t belong there, and yet I knew deep down I wasn’t technically just there as an ‘ally’.) Even Dan’s little tiny offhand mention in his mermaids stream! I was like, yeah, we do exist! 

It’s all sort of had the fringe benefit of feeling happier and better about being open about it, like joining the LGBT network at work and - you know, just taking little steps. (anyone wanting to start with me that aces/aros don’t belong in LGBT spaces can catch my tiny hands) I saw an ace lanyard at Vidcon and thought ‘yay!’ rather than being uncomfortable to wear it, partly because I thought about how happy I would be to see someone else wearing one.

I don’t know what the rest of this ‘journey’s going to look like, I just know that over the last year I’ve gotten mostly to a place where I can say I *like* being ace, because it’s actually just what I am in the same way I have brown hair or am short, and not some weird deviance from Being Normal that I Must! Hide! At All Costs! That might sound simple but it was a hard place to get to. (thanks Mr Fire, I guess)

I hope this ramble made *some* sense and answered your question in some way! Feel free to send any more questions :)

[rockcfellers]

 /   let  me  introduce  you  to  a  prized  member  of  our   student government   ,   arden rockefeller .  this   cisfemale  virgo   has  been  a  student  at  our  institution for   seven years   and  is  currently  a  21  year  old   junior.   through  the  halls ,   she  has   always  reminded  me  of   danielle rose russell  ,   but  there  is  always  more  than  meets  the  eye ,   like  the  fact  that  she managed to get somene’s admission to cape coral deferred a year for her own benefit .  coral  cape  has  made  their  future  just  as  bright  as  their  smile ,   i  assure  you .  ʼ      (   muse 10 ,  adri ,  19 ,  cst ,  she/her   )

go on, replace me, when you’re craving something sweeter than the words i left in your mouth, go on and spit me out

NAME — arden olivia rockefeller.

NICKNAMES — n/a? 

PRONOUNS — she/her.

AGE & DOB — 21 & august 23, 1998.

PLACE OF BIRTH — new york city, new york.

NATIONALITY — american.

MAJOR — psychology & political science.

EDUCATION — cape coral international school.

CLUBS — student government, unicef campus initiative, and lacrosse.

* background overview !

arden is twins with her brother, neels, both first born to this half of the rockefeller generation (he’s older by several minutes, but she’ll never attest to that) they’ve always been kinda close but never attached at the hip.

you know, i honestly feel like she had a fairly decent? childhood? like nothing was really wrong, just that her parents were always busy and never really gave the attention they should’ve to young children. 

she was typically always very bright and cheery to everyone, evoking a “your daughter’s so sweet” from most people she met, which felt like the biggest compliment to her, because it meant that someone thought she was nice even if they disliked the rest of her family for any given reason, kind of like a twisted self worth?

her parents definitely would’ve preferred she did something that seemed more feminine, but arden found a love for kickboxing and later lacrosse, the two sports a great place for her to channel her energy into, letting her mellow out when she’s going through her day to day routine.

arden’s still figuring out how to be both who she’s expected to be and who she wants to be without facing any real repercussions, but hasn’t quite gotten that part down yet.

it was always known she could come to cape coral, considering her family, but she’s lowkey really grateful that she was given the opportunity to study what she wanted where she wanted. 

that being said.... she’s still kinda a bitch. i mean, someone she knew from outside of cape coral wanted to applied and had gotten accepted, but arden had worried that they would interfere from her getting idk maybe a spot in the student government or accepted into her research program etc etc, so she talked to her grandfather and had their admission deferred a year so that her studies wouldn’t be affected.

* personality !

okay so,,,she is New so i’m still working out all the kinks but for the most part, she’s just.. neutral

before, she used to be like aggressively happy and cheery and nice. probably to compensate for the fact that everyone around her just seemed so mean.

she’s always hated being seen as weaker than or less than anyone else, which is partially why she’s taken up lacrosse and boxing, much to her grandfather’s distaste. 

now she’s more focused on herself and is capable of being able to brush off any kind of comment that comes from people she doesn’t feel like directly affect her, which isn’t a great mentality to have but neither is caring too much about what other people think

the part of her that was very kind and viewed life with a sweet naivety is there, but heavily guarded and buried. she just feels like, it’s not something that’ll do her much good rather than leave her looking a mess or fool when someone takes advantage of it.

she’s like,,,the person that isn’t afraid to knock you down a few pegs but will do so with the sweetest smile on her face to really seal the deal. 

she found an interest in politics, actually hating the way things were run but really enjoying finding out why people did and voted and favored the things they did, so she’s double majoring in psychology and political science

she tries to do everything on her own and hates asking for help, like even when she really needs to, but it’s mostly because really needing someone makes her uneasy because she’s always wondering if they’re going to leave her eventually or if they’re just using her or if they really don’t care about her the way she cares for them

that being said, she’s loyal as all hell to her loved ones. like will literally help you get away with murder if you asked her for help, once you’ve reached that point you are absolutely important to her.

* character tropes !

so she’s basically the maiden in the sense that she’s typically overly self confident and finds herself in positions where she’s stuck and needs help, whether it’s being in too many things at once and being too spread out or like in actual danger. arden heavily takes after her parents in the sense that she wants to be wholly capable of taking care of herself, the feeling of being dependent on someone making her uneasy. because of this, she finds herself in situations that could’ve been completely avoided if she had just taken a step off her high horse and admitted or realized she couldn’t do it on her own. the confidence she exhibits today was a learned trait however, arden getting her heartbroken by someone she had really loved taught her how to be comfortable with herself and just be a Badass, but protect the softer side to herself from then on.

* playlist !

wasabi — little mix:

stick like toffee, sip like coffee wake up, change your mind and drop me love to hate me, crazy, shady spit me out like hot wasabi lick me up, I'm sweet and salty mix it up and down my body love to hate me, praise me, shame me either way you talk about me

arden’s a strong believer in the quote by william shakespeare “love me or hate me, both are in my favour. If you love me, i will always be in your heart… if you hate me, i’ll always be in your mind.” she’s really aware of how she can come across as, but is really selective in who she cares to spend time showing her full self to. everyone else and every other opinion gets taken with a grain of salt. she’s definitely had friends that only used her for her name and then dropped her once they were done,she wasted no time moving on.

hold me while you wait — lewis capaldi:

i wish you'd cared a little more (hold me while you wait) i wish you'd told me this before (hold me while you wait) my love, my love, my love, my love won't you stay a while? (hold me while you wait)

a few years ago, she was in a relationship where she had cared a little bit too much about what they thought of her, finding herself seeking their approval for everything, truly believing this person was the sun. she fell hard and fast for them and they took advantage of this and cheated on her, thinking that they would get away with it… and they did for a while. arden tried to excuse it because of how much she loved them, but was starting to feel like she was never going to be good enough for them, but staying with them until things ultimately came to an end, still holding onto the hope that things would change. eventually she realized that she couldn’t keep holding onto that relationship forever and things ended.

winter — relic:

where am i going? i can’t see nothing but the road that’s out in front of me i think it’s snowing

arden’s the worst at multitasking and it shows even in her life. she’s very one track minded and knows what she wants out of it, but only sees one way to get there, so everything that’s the tiniest bit off her track, she gets thrown off completely and needs someone to just nicely push her back in the direction she was headed.

* aesthetics !

candle lights, the breathlessness felt when seeing big city skylines, scrunchies, tart strawberries dipped in sugar, iced coffee in mason jars, long swooping cursive, high-waisted jeans, half opened jewelry boxes, setting a new pen against fresh paper, standing outside during the middle of a sun-shower, tucked in shirts, a hand reaching out to catch you when you fall, golden hour. 

* wanted plots !

i’m the worst at coming up with things but,,,,, here’s a few 

general friends: honestly some from childhood, some from high school, others from college, give me New friend with the people coming on scholarship, anything

best friends: someone that’s been by her side for years, someone she’d literally trust with her whole life

ride or dies: honestly what it says, maybe like two or three of them that have been through the thick and thin of it but still have a really strong friendship in the end?

confidant: honestly, probably someone she’s close with, but doesn’t see on a regular basis? maybe they just box together from time to time to blow off steam? it helps if they’re not someone she’d see all the time, that way she’s not constantly staring her admission in the face

bad influence: someone who can teach her to let go and get out more, care even less about what others think, especially her parents. even if that’s taking her to parties or drinking/smoking alone in a room

exes ( good, bad, anything in between ): you know the drill, hit me with the good angst. (male, female, nb)

roommate ( probably a cape coral student ): arden doesn’t like needing people but that doesn’t mean she wants to be alone, they probably have a pretty nice place together ngl. i picture it being really cozy and nicely decorated?

hook ups: you also know this drill, sometimes you gotta blow off steam. (male, female, nb)

[shepherds-of-haven]

College!Au of Shepherd members? What likely are they (i.e. jock, player in the soccer team, bad-boy, the clichès.)? definitely not thinking of writing an au, and im certainly not thinking of maybe making a small edit about it. nOt aT aLl cApTAiN

Hi there! Have you seen the college AU asks? This one is pretty detailed about what kind of students they are, and this one is more succinct with their majors/minors! But I’m always happy to go more in-depth about AUs! 😉

In my imagination, Blade, Trouble, and Chase were suite-mates freshman year and get an apartment together when they’re not living on campus. (Halek, Red, and Riel are also roommates and then Riel can’t stand living in a dorm anymore so he buys a townhome with his family’s money and allows Halek and Red to live there to give himself some semblance of a social life.)

Blade is the scion of a very wealthy family who’s expected to take over the family business one day. Instead he majors in Criminal Justice and--in my imagination--secretly aims to become either a detective or a prosecutor because he suspects his family is involved with criminal organizations. He’s generally quiet, solemn, broody, and troubled (just like in the game lol) and is only dragged out to do “normal” college things by Trouble and Chase’s persistence! He’s in the fencing club and also goes to a mixed martial arts gym off-campus, sometimes with Trouble, which also happens to be the one Briony goes to. 

Trouble is in ROTC and majors in mechanical engineering, with dreams of joining the Air Force and becoming a pilot after graduation if he can keep his grades up. For some reason I have this idea that he got into this university on a soccer scholarship? He plays guitar and later gets a dog because fuck it, he’s always wanted one, and he’s rebuilding an old motorcycle in his spare time at this garage where his old school friends work. He definitely wears bomber jackets and letterman jackets like, a lot. He’s very popular and considered a “jock,” but a friendly one! He has an English class with Red and a math class with Riel, going to both of their study groups and then driving them crazy because he either doodles instead of studying or texts. Part-time, I feel like he delivers pizzas for some reason...

Chase is the third part of their trio and is more lax about his studies than the other two (which is a bad influence on Trouble). He does not talk at all about his family or home life and generally spends the holidays with either Blade or Trouble’s families. He’s an undeclared major and has no idea what he wants to do after college and is not worrying about it. He pays smart kids to do his homework for him, so he has an excellent GPA, much to the class president’s (Riel) fury. He’s part of a frat but doesn’t actually drink at parties, more concerned that everyone’s having a good time and making fun memories than he is about himself. He doesn’t allow any scummy behavior in the frat and secretly, on a whim, auditioned for a student play and is surprisingly very into it, to the point where he asks Briony and Trouble for help with his lines. After throwing a huge party where [x] happens, he starts a group chat with everybody involved in this story and it’s sort of how they all become friends, even though many of them already knew each other individually. Oh, and he’s very into Tinder, much to the chagrin of his other two roommates.

I think Briony, Ayla, and Lavinet are also roommates, and so are Shery, Tallys, and Mimir. Briony-Ayla-Lavinet’s place (BAL? Brionaylavi?) is Party Central, whereas Shery-Tallys-Mimir’s place (STM? Shallir?) is Quiet Coffee-Drinking Art Loft Sometimes Hipster Slam Poetry Book Clubs Central. 

Briony is either a journalism student or a law student, I can’t really decide. She takes a lot of extracurriculars at their university as a way to blow off steam, including a painting class (which is where she met Shery) and a horseback riding class, because why not? She has been training at the same mixed martial arts gym since she was a teenager, and she starts bringing Ayla and Lavinet there so they can defend themselves when they’re not altogether. Despite her cheerful attitude and popularity around campus, she seems to be running from a past back in her hometown that she doesn’t talk to anyone about, not even her closest friends: an obsessive ex and a dark past are just some of the things she doesn’t want catching up to her. Sometimes she earns part-time money covering shifts at the cafe Shery works at. 

Ayla is a journalism/communications student who will later switch majors to hospitality and hate it. She gives wilderness tours and white-water-rafting tours in the summers as a seasonal job and plays volleyball on the university team during the spring seasons and track and field during the fall. Her grades are abysmal and she goes to the tutoring center often for help, which is how she meets Red and Riel. She rides a Vespa around town and also attends the yoga class that Tallys teaches. Yes she wears leather jackets and occasionally beanies. She was too cheap to a buy a meal plan at the university cafeteria so she often skims from others or uses their extra meals before the week runs out. She is a lover of junk food and crams their apartment pantry with all manner of chips, soda, ramen, packaged mac and cheese, and etc! She also definitely games. 

Lavinet is a wealthy socialite daughter of the CEO and founder of a huge conglomerate: think a Paris Hilton, but more grounded. She’s majoring in business and political science, being groomed to take over her father’s role, but she wants a taste of “normal” life before that happens. All of her rich friends from high school thinks she’s slumming it with the other kids, but Lavinet’s having the time of her life. She tries not to stand out too much, but she unconsciously does, anyway: wearing designer coats and sunglasses to class, driving a flashy convertible, and keeping her books in a high-end handbag, because backpacks are “schlubby.” She means well but can sometimes be a bit of a drama queen to her roommates. She also loves juicy gossip and eats it up! She has been known to take her roommates’ phones and flirt for them with potential dates. She has a popular vlog and Instagram account, which I imagine is how Briony’s dark past catches up to her. She loves to get coffee at the shop that Shery and sometimes Briony work at and always seems to have a latte in her hand. She can point at any given person and name what lipstick they would be if they were one. She’s fairly good at her studies and loves to be in charge of study groups and gets into a war with another girl who tries to ‘poach’ her study partners. She absolutely takes French and fashion design classes and heads all over campus turn when she walks past!

Red, Riel, and Halek live in what is known as the “Nerd House.” Red is pretty much always at coffee shops and libraries, studying and reading, so much so that he doesn’t notice multiple other students checking him out in his rolled-up sweater sleeves and messenger bag. He’s got a bit of an “Academic Hipster” vibe and definitely has hipster tastes in music and books. He goes to poetry readings at cafes (of which Mimir is a staple) and goes on a lot of first dates that don’t lead anywhere, giving him the reputation of either a really picky person or a playboy. Does he wear glasses? Absolutely. Is it because he needs them? Probably not. On some subconscious level he is probably aware that he looks smart and cute in them. Sometimes he plays pickup soccer with Trouble’s practice team (he played in high school) when he realizes he’s been sitting around too long reading and needs to get some blood pumping! He studies philosophy and history as a double-major. 

Riel is the class president and later valedictorian of their class. He majors in math, business and finance, history, and psychology as one of the university’s only “quadruple majors”. He comes from an extremely wealthy family that has donated so much money to the school that many of the buildings have his last name on them. Occasionally he volunteers at the tutoring center, where his worst and most rebellious student is Ayla, who he vows to break. You can often find him in the music building, reserving one of the practice rooms to play beautiful classical piano, which he doesn’t like to play at home with his roommates around. He abhors eating or studying outside because, mysteriously, every time he walks through the quad, a frisbee hits him in the head. He is the head of a business fraternity that is constantly being pranked by Chase’s frat. 

Halek initially attended their university as a Food Science major, but dropped out and now attends the culinary arts institute across the street. (His twin brother, Naolin, goes to a prestigious university across the country and is studying to become a doctor.) He works as a barista at the cafe where Shery and sometimes Briony work as servers: the one with sleepy eyes that you end up spilling your life story to when you sit at the counter to drink your frappe and study. Plays the drums in a band that performs at open-mic nights and owns a tank of fish. In class he was constantly falling asleep at his desk but has no trouble now. Definitely smokes weed in his room occasionally and has a litany of tattoos up and down his forearms and hands (and for that matter, Ayla does too).

Finally, the Art Loft trio, Tallys, Shery, and Mimir, who definitely have a garden on their roof and hang their clothes up to dry in the sun up there, which Lavinet for whatever reason refers to as their “solarium.”

Tallys is a plant biology major who aims to be recruited into the country’s top holistic/nature-based pharmaceutical company. She teaches yoga outside of class to make money (and Ayla and sometimes Lavinet attend her morning classes). For whatever reason I feel like she smokes and looks really freaking cool doing it but decides to quit after a relative has a cancer scare. She enjoys classical music and plays the violin when she can. She is shares cooking duties with Shery and picks her up from her job at the cafe so she doesn’t have to walk home at night, leading many to mistakenly assume they’re girlfriends. She constantly has AirPods/earphones in, listening to music, and rarely speaks to others outside of class. Strangely, she owns a flip phone and owns no social media. 

Shery is a nursing student who loves to cook and bake as a hobby. She’s a natural introvert and prefers to stay in with her roommates, watching TV while she embroiders, or something, but one day she decides she wants to be more social and that’s how she befriends Halek and Briony. She owns a cat who rules the roost in their apartment as well as a hamster. She keeps detailed diaries and also writes poetry, but is too shy to share it with anyone, including Mimir, her roommate who’s an art major. She always wears pastels and very cute clothing and is a straight-A student. Her parents are pretty stingy so she works at a coffee shop, the Haven, as a way to earn money. She’s also helping with costume design for Chase’s play and rides a bike to campus and to work. She’s close with her professors and often visits them during office hours just to chat.

Mimir is an art student who’s making a big splash in the local scene, as she’s regarded as something of a young genius for her bizarre slam poetry and cryptic, surrealistic paintings. She often does readings at the Haven coffee shop during open-mic nights, and she constantly wears a hoodie, even to class. She paints her nails black and rocks that goth artist aesthetic, complete with dark eye makeup and black lipstick. She rarely speaks, but when she does, it’s usually to say something startlingly-insightful or incredibly mysterious. She feeds birds in the main quad on campus, to the point where they recognize her and will fly to her hand. She smells constantly of incense and can sometimes be seen rummaging around in trash cans on campus for her art installations. There is a mysterious cloaked figure on campus who rides a unicycle while blowing on bagpipes that also spew fire that everyone thinks is her, and she only smiles and fades away when anyone asks. 

[cohentm]

✮     ∷     ╰  𝖈𝖔𝖍𝖊𝖓  &  𝖈𝖗𝖊𝖜  :  

a connection  /  plot masterlist  .

              oof hey babies! i’m making this post so y’all know exactly how i’m breaking down the plots i have so far. i jotted down fulfilled connections, followed by the people i know i’m still in the midst of plotting with ( labeled “tba,” will be updated once we’ve decided on a backstory ), & at the end i listed some wanted connection ideas! even if you see your character on this list, though, and you’re like miss bri.... i want to change / add to / alter / etc that paragraph u wrote... especially if u see a wanted connection and you’re like whew i kinda want that now.... puhlease lmk. i’m down for absolutely anything & everything. mwah. x

𝖋𝖚𝖑𝖋𝖎𝖑𝖑𝖊𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖓𝖓𝖊𝖈𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓𝖘.

parker  ,  ride or die  .  

these two could be a tag team duo if they wanted to be--and practically are when it comes down to it. cohen isn’t scared to get into a fight just because parker’s already there. parker’s hotheadedness and cohen’s will to throw a punch have been melding since the earliest of days, when parker was getting into abrupt locker room fights with their own teammates, even. cohen, being the type who can’t avoid starting shit with those same teammates, never found himself pooling more blame into parker’s bucket. instead, cohen sympathizes the only way he knows how: by holding out his hand and letting parker know that cohen doesn’t need a rhyme or reason to have parker’s back. for cohen nowadays, it’s just on sight. 

olivia  ,  meeting in the middle  /  opposites attract  .

the truth is, olivia should absolutely hate cohen, and cohen should absolutely hate olivia. she’s all warmth & sunlight and he’s all hasty reactions & tunnel vision. but for some reason, olivia has managed to penetrate his demeanor without even trying. he tries to be marginally “better” whenever he crosses her path. when they speak, he finds himself thinking things out a fraction deeper before he throws the whole idea / person / situation in the garbage like the pessimist / self-acclaimed “realist” he is. at parties, he’s the first to jump into a fight, but with olivia’s soft touch, he hesitates. he doesn’t know what it is about her, but she makes himself second guess himself ( often for the better ).

finn  ,  chaotic neutral  &  neutral evil friendship  .

if there’s one person cohen can stand for extended periods of time, it’s finn. finn’s chaotic neutral personality melds with cohen’s neutral evil personality seamlessly. oftentimes, finn and cohen are the duo at the party nodding at each other from across the room because a situation is escalating and cohen’s already rolling up his sleeves prepping to knock someone out for the hell of it. no matter what, finn’s a non-team member cohen’s constantly catching himself leaning on a little. he doesn’t feel like he has to watch his mouth around finn, let alone feel guilty for something like a consistently dirty car ( LXFMDFG ), which is a refreshing feeling cohen doesn’t often run into.

leo  ,  harsh truth-tellers  .

it isn’t uncommon for cohen to bump into leo, given his record for getting called off the field. coach tended to send him to the locker room with a physical therapist just to hide the fact that what cohen was actually getting called off for was excessive anger during a game. leo’s a hardass just like cohen, though, which makes speaking to her simultaneously easier and harder--since she’s bound to knock heads with him, but also give it back just the way he takes it. if there’s one thing cohen’s an expert at in their tedious relationship, though, it’s judging leo for all she’s worth. part of him loves the fact that she keeps herself so upright, after all, so when she’s simping hard and cohen feels she’s dwelling or losing track of herself just to appease people who treat her like shit, cohen’s never been afraid to let her know. this gives their relationship a rocky little twist, but cohen doesn’t shy from the truth.

summer  ,  no strings flirtationship  (  ft. mild to severe seemingly unrequited pining  )  .

summer and cohen have always been oddly close in a way that cohen isn’t close with anyone else. in high school, in a dramatic effort to push summer away after too many a repeated fling, cohen invited summer to his chaotic home. however, poised as she was, she remained entirely unphased by his chaotic living situation & family. since then, cohen has felt more uncomfortably comfortable around summer than he has around anyone else. she continuously manages to seep into his life all on her own. they sleep together casually on occasion, often fight “playfully” in an effort to egg each other on, and tend to open up to each other entirely unprecedently.

clara  ,  ex-girlfriend circa cohen’s sophomore year of college ( two years ago )  &  family friends  .

cohen and clara have been linked via their love for each other’s sibling since high school. clara was always best friends with his sister natalie, and he was always best friends with her brother cam. although clara was a consistent aspect in cohen’s life, they never got together until clara’s senior year of high school, which was subsequently cohen’s sophomore year of college. cohen was convinced he’d make it with her ( which is a rarity in & of itself ) much longer than they actually ended up making it, since cam died a year into their official relationship, sending both cohen and clara spiralling in entirely separate directions. 

renee  ,  PLOTTING ENSUING  !  TBA  .

tyler  ,  PLOTTING ENSUING  !  TBA  .

rafael  ,  PLOTTING ENSUING  !  TBA  .

devon  ,  cousins  .

georgia  ,  PLOTTING ENSUING  !  TBA  .

𝖜𝖆𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖓𝖓𝖊𝖈𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓𝖘.

childhood best friends  and/or  cousins  :  someone cohen knows very deeply, and vice versa. maybe they lived in the same trailer park, maybe your muse’s rich family is related or connected, somehow to his poor cowboy redneck family ( maybe his construction worker dad was drunk on the job and now ur muse’s family thinks of his alcoholic messy parents as nuisances? maybe his parents think ur muse’s parents are too posh and hate their guts? ), maybe their families don’t get along.... maybe their families DO get along and ur muse is someone his parents ask after and talk about constantly! the possibilities are endless. regardless, though, this muse and cohen grew up playing together, smoking cigarettes ( or ur muse watching 12 y/o cohen smoke a cig MVLKFDG ), pretending to be grown because cohen FELT like he was grown by the time he could speak clear sentences, etc. cohen’s family’s a mess but they’re a family all the same. they may fight and drink constantly, but at the end of the day you can find them outside their trailers sitting in camping chairs drinking budweiser around a campfire and making fun of each other.

unrequited  /  secret  /  forbidden crush  :  maybe your muse secretly liked cohen and never said anything, maybe cohen secretly liked your muse and never said anything, etc. bonus points if your muse’s family knows cohen has a whole ass petty criminal record a la ryan from the o.c. and would absolutely throw a fit if they saw their kid even looking in cohen jetson’s general vicinity for too long. LKMDFK how they each deal with their crush today is totally up to us.

bail out  :  someone who vouches for cohen even when he’s getting into the worst kind of trouble. maybe they’ve caught him coming down from a high ( he used to take athletic stimulants for energy & performance, and is currently eight months into his most recent recovery / rehab attempt ) and have kept the fact that they saw him using on the dl in an effort to give him a chance to be better without getting kicked off the team. maybe they’ve given him a ride home from jail after getting picked up for fighting or public drunkenness and his parents weren’t picking up bc why would cohen’s parents ever.... LMDSFLKFG. maybe cohen bails ur muse out too and secretly helps them even when they should be left to suffer in the SAME way that cohen should be left to suffer. but they’re too close. it’s almost like they coddle each other. maybe it’s due to some romantic subplot or something like a sibling inkling. OOF maybe they’re exes. kill me now u know?

sponsor  -  esque relationship  :  basically someone who can cool cohen down when he’s craving a high, craving alcohol, when he’s getting irritable because he’s not performing well enough, when he’s going workout-crazy and needs someone to be like bitch.... can u sit down for like five seconds? LDMDFLKGKFG someone who doesn’t care when cohen cusses them out for no reason because they’ve got a tough shell and know he’s just getting irritable w them because he’s having a moment. someone patient w him. someone he has probably cried to before because he’s...... tired.

party friend  :  self-explanatory! maybe they’re infamous for ditching parties and heading straight to bars together. LDFMKD absolutely iconic of them. they’ve probably at least made out upwards of ten times because that’s.... cohen. SKDFJ unless ur a straight male, in which case, he politely flirts with u and that’s it. x basically this muse has seen him get into unwarranted bar fights just because he’s a bitch who will ALWAYS throw the first punch, this muse has walked home with him when they’re both way too drunk to drive, this muse probably goes back to cohen’s apartment PLASTERED with him after midnight and stays up to cook a meal and play a game of uno with him, etc, etc. we love nothin’ but warm-hearted fun in this house. 

exes on bad terms  /  hateship  /  enemies that detest each other  :  oof someone cohen has screwed over multiple times? more likely than u think. which is very likely. LKDSMFLKDF maybe they were exes? maybe cohen cheated on your muse? maybe cohen cheated WITH your muse and your muse didn’t find out until the break-up? maybe cohen beat your muse’s brother’s/dad’s ass and now there’s bad blood? maybe cohen broke things off with your muse before things could ever get serious? maybe cohen’s general demeanor just pisses your muse off? we’ve all been there KDNFDLKGN. basically these two hate each other and don’t even TRY to hide it anymore.

[nothingnessreality]

last vote

This may be your last chance to vote in a real election.

Here is something that most people don’t know. According to the American Psychiatric Association (APA), about 1.5% of all males are psychopaths and about 4% are sociopaths. A psychopath is defined as a person who is born with zero empathy, and thus sees all people as just objects to be used. Sociopaths on the other hand also have no empathy but are made that way growing up, and so do mostly petty crimes.

So if you combine the two we have 6 million Americans who have no empathy, but that gets worse because this is on a scale from the lowest empathy to the highest and there are another 10 million Americans who have little to no empathy or caring for others outside the people they know. They are antisociety.

This 16% of Americans, believe it or not, is fairly normal, but in the last 40 years the number of Americans who only care about their family and friends has grown to well over 100 million Americans, a third of America!!! They are now the Radical Right, Trump cult. If this doesn’t shock you then maybe you have become one of the 100 million who are antisociety.

Why is that, and why have we become so divided? The answer is simple; we have been divided on purpose.

One Australian study found that 1 in 5, 20%, of corporate CEOs and lawyers are psychopaths! Other studies now show that when most people become wealthy they lose their caring for anyone outside their circle, So today 75% of the wealthy have no feeling or caring for anyone outside their circle. Thus they are antisociety in general, and many, 20% to 50%, are psychopaths. In other words this group of rich people don’t care if you live or die, and most would kill you if you stood between them and their money.

There are around 600 billionaires in the US, and if just 20% are psychopaths or sociopaths, which is easily true, we are talking about at least 100+ billionaires who would love to take control of the US, and do not care who they hurt doing it. With their billions they could easily create a secret group which would have all the money they would ever need to pay for subversion, propaganda, or anything else they needed to divide us. Guess what, that is just what is happening.

A large group of sociopathic billionaires, which the New York Times thinks may be around 400 members, has started a secret group who’s major goal is to take as much control of America as they can, and turn it into an oligarchy, where only they can vote. Because they have kept what they are doing a secret, what is going on has only started to come to light in the last ten years.

We now know that the head of this subversive organization is Charles

Koch, CEO of Koch industries. He has an annual income of 110 billion, according to Forbes. His Father was cofounder of the John Birch Society, in the 1950s, and before starting the John Birch Society he wrote a 30 page anti communism booklet, which contained a way that the US could be taken over. It was poorly thought out, but his two sons are now using the writings of Vladimir Lenin to try and do it for real. The John Birch Society is the most radical right wing organizations in American history, and was condemned by the Republican Party at the time, but all of their radical ideology has now become main steam Republican ideology, through the uses of propaganda and subversion.

At minimum 75%+ of Republicans are now as radical right wing as they can get. They hate society, government, blacks, gays, Unions etc., and think they should have total free will, to hell with the other 320 million Americans.

Some of the first members of the Koch organization were Richard Mellon Scaife, heir to the Mellon Banking and Gulf Oil; Harry and Lynde Bradley, defense contracts; John M. Olin, chemical and munitions Companies; Coors brewing family, and the DeVos family of Amway marketing.

I call them the Oligarchy because that is what they are trying to do, become the Oligarchy over the US, where only the wealthy can vote, and the 4 keys to subversion they use are Fear, Intimidation, Distraction, and Division. It has worked. We now are more divided than ever, in the whole of our history.

The Oligarchy budgeted 800 million to buy the president in the 2016 campaign, and every republican presidential candidate, except Donald Trump, had signed on and pledged allegiance to the oligarchy. Yes, literally signed a contract. Donald Trump used his own money to get elected by creating a cult following, just like Adolf Hitler did in Germany, and Benito Mussolini did in Italy. The oligarchy denounced Trump during the campaign, but once he got elected they made a deal with him to use members of the oligarchy in his cabinet.

Trump keeps saying he will be president for 12 more years. Where is he getting that? The president is term limited to 8 years and he has already had 4. I speculate that it may be part of the deal. Once they take control of the US he gets to have 12 more years.

So, for the past 4 years the Koch oligarchy has been setting up the US from the inside of the government to take control of it. Including packing the courts with their Judges, all trained at the Federalists Society, which is an oligarchy sponsored foundation for Lawyers.

Between 2015 to 2017 Mitch McConnell refused to seat any of Obama’s 100+ federal judges, including Merrick Garland for the Supreme Court. Then when Trump was elected McConnell quickly filled all the seats with Federalist Society Judges.

Keep in mind that it was the Radical Right Bolshevik party that took over Russia in the 1920s, and made Vladimir Lenin their leader. It was the Radical Right fascist party that took over Italy in 1922, and made Benito Mussolini their leader. It was the Radical Right Nazi party that took over Germany in 1933, and made Adolf Hitler their leader, it was the Radical Right Red Guard

that took over China in 1966, and made Mao Zedong their leader, and the list goes on. It is always the Radical Right that takes over a country and turn the country into an authoritarian government, and that is now happening in the US. It looks like it is our turn; the US now has a Radical Right that would rival any of these.

The best-documented book on the Koch’s and their syndicate, and how secretive they are, comes from an investigative reporter of the New York Times, Jane Mayer. Her book is called “Dark Money: The Hidden History of the Billionaires Behind the Rise of the Radical Right.”

Another book that shows, beyond any doubt, what the Koch syndicate is trying to do comes from Nancy MacLean, a social historian, who stumbled across a large stash of secret documents left behind after the death of a member of the Koch syndicate. Her book, after going though these secret files, is called “Democracy in Chains: The Deep History of the Radical Right's Stealth Plan for America.”

If you want to know more about how Trump created a cult following read: “The Cult of Trump” by Steven Hassa. Dr. Hassa is a psychologist who studies cults. He got started because when he was a young man in college he got sucked into a Cult, and has first hand knowledge of how they work.

Too many Americans live in the illusion that it can’t happen here, but it absolutely can and is. If you refuse to believe that this is true you had better open your eyes, and do some research. Before you say this is hype you should at least read Nancy MacLean’s book. I can guarantee you that if they get control of the US your civil rights will be gone, and the first things they will do will be to ban all guns and get rid of anyone who is a threat to the government.

Today the Koch syndicate is well over 100 think tanks whose main goal is to take controls of America. Most of these foundations are charitable foundations on the surface, but in the basement is a large staff that does nothing but look for ways to subvert, radicalize, and divide American Democracy.

The more divided we become, the more control they have. They can use the Electoral College to their advantage, and that is how Trump got elected; this is why we are so divided, it is on purpose. The Oligarchy now literally owns just about every Republican in the House and Senate, who does just as they are told. Their only allegiance is to the Republican Party, and it is 100% controlled by the oligarchy.

If Trump gets reelected, and that is very likely because of the oligarchies use of voter suppression, and use of the Electoral College, it will be all over, the end of American Democracy. Because by the end of his next term they will have massed so much control working from inside the government that there will be no turning back, and I’m betting if this happens the US will split up because the blue states won’t cooperate with an authoritarian government, and the world’s longest standing constitution will melt away.

The reason Trump was able to con so many people is because they where set up before hand by the propaganda coming from the Koch syndicate, which, as I said, is a spin off of the John Birch Society, which had a surge of

membership in 2010. So, you better wake up as to what is really going on or the US will become an oligarchy where only the rich can vote.

Don’t think for a second that the Democratic Party leadership doesn’t know about this. A number of them have endorsements in the front of Nancy MacLean’s book, “Democracy in Chains.” But if they talk about it in public it will be turned into a political football. Joe Biden has said, “If Trump gets elected it may be the end of America as we know it.” So, this may be your last chance to vote in a real election.

[shoheiakagi]

Summary: In which HOMRA is a bunch of college frat boys trying to get in your pants. Or: “Come back, I’m not done wasting your time.”

Warnings: Some might be a bit ooc since they’re all fuckboys in here (some more than others), y/n culture, angst, somewhat explicit ***, unrequited feelings, Chitose in his natural habitat, Fujishima is a furry, Yata still can’t talk to women, and Bandou still can’t get laid.

Word Count: 5.6k lol

Notes: OKAY, IT’S FINALLY HERE. I was working on my FwB piece with @mangoqueens when we were suddenly like, “Okay, but fuckboy!homra tho.” Also, not including the trio in this one cause I wanted to focus on the younger guys more. A quick shoutout to @anewmourning for helping me come up with ideas for fuckboy!fujishima. This is my first ever time doing something like this, so I apologize for any grammar mistakes or stale dialogue. Reblogs/replies are appreciated!

This is pretty self indulgent, so ignore it if it’s not your thing.

Yata

Obnoxious in a completely different way from the average fuckboy (as in he doesn’t break your heart. Well, not intentionally).

That one guy who always shows up to your Philosophy class late with loud rap music blasting from his headphones, with a skateboard under his arm.

But if he’s not coming to class late, he’s skipping. You don’t think you ever saw him come to class on time (seriously, why is he even in this class?).

If he’s not sleeping in class, he’s always arguing with someone, even the Professor. Usually, that random student happens to be you.

“What the fuck do you mean we don’t have free will?” “I mean that there’s something called fucking fate which means everything is destined to be, you asshat!” “The fuck did you call me?”

You happened to be the lucky student he fights with cause of the one time you ‘accidentally’ told him to shut the fuck up (but in a ‘kind’ way cause you can’t just go around cursing during class) and you’ve been on his radar ever since.

But not in that “damn, i wanna fuck her” way, more like “i hate her, i gotta ruin her life” type of way since you pretty much embarrassed him in class.

Doesn’t really hate you or wanna ruin your life though, just likes to start fights with you over petty shit (Bandou would be proud).

Intervenes whenever you’re flirting with another guy in class with the pretext of trying to “save” him from you.

And everyone definitely notices his behavior towards you cause no matter how obnoxious Yata is, he never picked any fights with girls (except for that one busty blonde who’s part of the student govt).

If he’s really feeling bold (and stupid), he would sometimes tug on your hair or jab you with his pen to get a reaction out of you in class.

Pretty much the embodiment of the whole “you know a boy likes you if he teases you a lot.”

Your philosophy class is practically a war zone at this point with how much you two bicker (which really pisses everyone off). 

One day your prof assigns the class a group paper and partners you and Yata up (probably for some sadistic reason). 

You refuse to have anything to do with Yata at first but then he just declares that you can write the whole paper then. So you bitterly suck it up and force him to contribute just out of spite (you know if you write it yourself, your grade will be higher. But you’re honestly willing to take the lower grade if it means Yata will suffer in the process). 

He stands you up whenever you arrange to meet in cafes, the library, etc. You leave him really angry, nasty texts and tell him to go to hell.

You were over it one day and marched up to his dorm room, banging on the door, demanding that he let you in. He opens the door, irritated with you, and you push through and start going OFF on how much of an idiot and a dick he was. 

And as cliche as it is, you guys were too busy yelling at each other to notice how the distance between you two was getting shorter and shorter until you had him backed against the wall. Yata looked at your lips, before looking up to glare at you, “I fucking hate you.” Before you can respond some equally nasty shit, he immediately slammed his lips against you. 

What started off as a kiss, eventually turned into you getting fucked by Yata against the wall (God, you never knew a day like this would ever happen...and that he would actually be a good fuck despite his height and inability to talk to most women).

You both eventually fall into this pattern of sleeping with each other, since it’s an easier way to deal with anger and stress.

But other than sex, nothing changes between you two. You still treat each other like shit.

And in the end, your paper got a C+ so at least you passed.

You didn’t notice that you caught feelings for him until a friend pointed out that you seemed to have softened up on Yata (which you denied, of course).

But once you realized that his smile is probably one of the cutest things you’ve ever seen and how his usually obnoxious laugh suddenly became endearing to you, you noticed a change in his behavior.

He...he doesn’t pick a fight with you that much anymore? That’s a good thing, right?

But...he doesn’t really talk to you that much either, other than some half assed replies. And he stopped coming over for sex too. 

Was fighting (and sex) really the only way you guys communicated with each other?

You try not to think much of it and decide to treat yourself to your favorite drink at the cafe nearby.

And it wasn’t until you were halfway across campus when you hear that familiar voice and your heart started beating like crazy when he came in your view.

But before you can call out to him, you notice the petite figure walking next to him. And then you really take a look at Yata this time.

For the first time ever, you see Yata unlike his usual, loud self. He’s patiently teaching the pretty girl how to use his skateboard, and when she holds onto him in fear of falling, you see how broad his smile gets, despite his awkward stammers and obvious blush. It was only when the girl leans over to kiss his cheek, when you decide to walk away.

It’s just in your fate for your first heartbreak to be like this.

Kamamoto

Ah yes, the king of ghosting™

So here’s the thing, you didn’t think much of him at first. But then you found out that he’s one of them and suddenly, he was just another annoying ass fuckboy to you.

So you were shocked to see him join the home economics club you were part of. 

Didn’t take you long to change your opinion again cause despite his sketchy appearance and friend group, he was such a sweetheart??? He was always making sure all of the club members were appreciated and acknowledged for their efforts, would bring food for everyone, etc.

And you find yourself becoming friends with him, learning about how his parents owned a liquor store back home, how he spent his first couple of years in college undeclared cause he was following Yata around so that they can major in the same field, which obviously didn’t work out (fortunately, he was able to discover his passion for cooking).

It was during a rainy day when he was walking you back to your dorm when he leaned over to kiss you. And it was after a couple of dates, you decided to ride him in your dorm when your roommate was out. 

And all was well till it was the end of the semester and it was time to go home for summer break. Despite promising to keep in touch over the summer, you notice the good morning texts becoming rare until it just stopped showing up. Replies to your texts would be vague or one worded (if it’s one of those lucky days where he finally decides to text back). It doesn’t take that long for you figure out what’s happening.

He’s ghosting you.

aka he’s breaking up with you without even letting you know.

He wants to play that game? Then fine, you’re not the type to beg someone to stay anyway. Out of sight, out of mind.

“Easier said than done,” you mused to yourself as you search for his Instagram later on.

You don’t know what you were expecting to see on his page, but you definitely were not expecting to see this thin, surfer looking guy pop up, donning the same name and username as Kamamoto.

You check his instagram and see his latest selfies and you can’t believe what you’re seeing???? Who is this guy and where is Rikio???

You thought that Kamamoto must have changed his @ until you realized that the names still there and that the other homra guys are following him (with jealous, bitter comments from Yata, Bandou, and Chitose).

He posts a lot of pics with so many pretty girls, his comment section is filled with girls, he’s out partying with so many girls. 

And you can’t help but notice this petite girl named Ayumi, who keeps popping up in his comments (and the fact that he’s always replying to her).

You eventually give up. Maybe this is a sign from God that it wasn’t meant to be.

But when you come back to uni, you noticed that he’s back to his normal shape. How does he lose and gain that much weight in such a quick span of time??? And his hair???? 

Ironically, he suddenly remembers your existence and pretends as if he didn’t ignore you during the summer.

When he waits for you outside of your classroom with a boxed lunch for you two to share, you immediately turn around and walk away.

You loved yourself too much to let yourself be used like that.

Akagi

You know him cause everyone on campus knows him, judging by the large amount of followers he has on social media, and how he’s always seen hanging with all types of people on campus.

The type to constantly post shirtless pics and gym selfies, so that he can show off his abs and biceps (you may or may not have drooled at one or five pics). Posts videos of his crazy nights out, which always include girls and alcohol. Strangely enough though, with the amount of girls he’s seen with, you don’t hear any crazy rumors about him with any of the girls he’s seen with other than a casual hookup here and there.

He also happens to be in your consumer behavior class. And unlike the majority of the class, he’s one of the rare people who takes this class cause he actually majors in marketing. It fits him though, he’s an extremely social person who is good at persuading people, as proven during his presentation of why students should invest in the shitty gym near campus (y’know, the type ex convicts work out at), rather than the one provided by Uni.

It wasn’t until you worked with him in a group assignment that you realized that he’s a lot nicer than he looks. Suddenly, conversations about the group assignment transitioned from sitting next to each other in class to actually hanging outside of class and making plans.

It didn’t take a long time for you to realize that you were whipped for this full time student, part time delinquent with puppy dog eyes and a boyish grin.

Despite your sudden revelation, things were normal between you two. As much as you wanted your feelings to be reciprocated, you knew there was a line between your fantasies and reality. The way he interacted with you was pretty much how he interacted with everyone else and that is something you have come to understand. You guys were just friends, and nothing more.

Well, that’s what you thought until that one party homra threw a party in celebration for Bandou getting a C- in his Cultural Anthropology midterm that he thought he was going to fail (at this point, they were just desperate to throw a party).

Shouhei was a social butterfly with a lot of friends, so you weren’t surprised that he didn’t remain by your side after greeting you and your friends since he was busy rotating between different groups of people throughout the party. 

But what you didn’t expect was him coming over to talk to you about the upcoming marketing exam while you were dancing along with one of your guy friends. But you realize that it’s just an excuse when he puts his hand on your lower back, inviting you to his room so that you guys can talk in private (but you didn’t care).

Next thing you know, you’re laid up on his bed with his face buried between your thighs.

Ever since that night, things have changed between you guys. Suddenly, study sessions in reserved study rooms would end up with you bent over the table while he thrusts into you. And if you didn’t know better, you would’ve thought this was his infamous friend, Chitose you were dealing with. 

But you know it’s Shouhei when you find out that you guys are exclusive (which relieves you when you remember how many pretty girls he’s friends with) and how there are times where you guys would have sweet pillow talks where you both talk about general shit like future aspirations but also some deep shit like family issues.

But things get difficult cause you guys act like you’re in a relationship, even though you aren’t.

You want to be in a relationship with him, but he’s not sure if he wants to settle down yet.

But he also doesn’t want to let you go, preferring to have you as his girl, but w/o officially being his girl.

You deal with this clownery shit for a few more weeks (cause you’re weak) until you finally decided to put an end to w/e you two have going on, and blocking him on social media right before the semester ended.

You eventually link up with another guy from uni over the summer and things go great with him and you guys return to the new semester as a couple.

You forgot all about Shouhei until you come across him with Bandou and Chitose on the hallways while walking with your man.

Shit, you just made eye contact with him, time to pretend you don’t know this guy.

But he calls out your name anyway, and asks you how’ve you been since you’ve been pretty awol.

(Even though Shouhei stopped walking in order to talk to you, Chitose and Bandou continue to walk past you. You don’t know if you should be relieved or worried).

You tell him that you’ve been pretty busy (trying to pretend that you didn’t block him on ig) and introduce him to your boyfriend.

You couldn’t help but notice Shouhei sizing up your man while talking to you. “So you went off and got yourself a boyfriend, huh?” His tone was carefree and nonchalant, but you knew better.

“Well we had some pretty good times together last semester too. Did you tell him about me?” *Cue implications of sexual (and semi romantic) relationship you shared with him to make your bf jealous and to back off*

You grab your bf’s hand and walk away from him before things can get messy.

Pretty much resorts to sending you texts asking if he can see you, and that just cause you’re in a relationship, doesn’t mean you can’t hang with other guys. Leaves you drunk messages and voicemails, begging you to come back to him, and how he thinks he fell in love with you.

First one to wish you a happy birthday text (even before your own bf) at 12 a.m. despite you not talking to him for months.

You want to save his texts and messages for memories’ sake (and that somewhere deep inside of you, you still have some leftover feelings for him) but you end up deleting it just incase your bf comes across it.

To move on is to grow.

Bandou

That one weird, quiet kid who usually sits in the back of the classroom, all bundled up in a hoodie and a dark pair of sunglasses (yes, even inside the classroom). 

You initially thought he was pretty harmless (despite his suspicious apparel) since he usually minded his own business and worked alone.

But you were wrong. so so wrong.

It happened to be one of those days where the professor randomly announces some assignment in class and everyones already paired up, leaving you no choice but to partner with little miss sunshine at the back.

And that is when you unfortunately get to know him. For someone who doesn’t talk much, he’s hella loud. If he’s not cursing at every error message he receives from entering a code, he’s ranting about the smallest (and dumbest) shit you can possibly think of. But it didn’t really bother you that much until it happened. 

 While working through the assignment, you would feel his gaze on you. But anytime you would look up to meet his gaze, he would quickly turn away with a small smirk on his face. This goes on for a while until you finally hiss at him to stop staring at you. He immediately goes on defense and sneers at you, “Well shit, I didn’t know it was a crime to look at people these days. You should probably seek therapy if people looking at you scares the shit out of you.” 

And you swear you never wanted to smack someone this bad before.

You were hoping that the assignment would be finished asap, so that you wouldn’t have to deal with him any longer. But fortunately for you, the professor decided to extend the deadline for the assignment, so that means more quality time spent with your partner. You frown, while Bandou smirks.

If you thought he was bad in person, he’s even worse in social media (you refuse to give him your number). Always sends you a message, especially after you post a selfie. 

Pretty much the embodiment of texting like a straight white boy.

“Oh so you’re alone in your room now?? What are you wearing now??” *gets no responses back*

As per tradition, sends you an unsolicited dick pic while messaging you about a class assignment.

You see him without his stupid get up for the first time in a party thrown for him by his friends. And wow, he’s actually really fucking cute??? Who knew fucking Bandou would be that good looking? But alas, his annoying personality remains the same. 

He tries to pull a move on you while on the dancefloor, whether it’s to give you a kiss or to have you grind on him. He gets annoyed when you reject him (again) and tells you to leave the party since you’re not giving him any action, with a (cute) pout on his face.

“Y’know, this party was held for ME. It’S MY party so I can tell people to leave whenever I want to-wait you’re actually leaving????”

And maybe it’s because of the realization that Bandou is a lot cuter than you thought, or the fact that you have grown used to his company (and advances), you’re on your knees in an empty bathroom stall, giving him the best blowjob he’s possibly ever had. 

Which you ended up regretting since the next day you were met with whistles and smug smirks when you walked passed some of the guys of homra, immediately knowing why when your eyes zeroed in on a smug Bandou, who threw you a kissy face.

You were planning to ignore them and go on with your day, since this type of behavior is expected from them, but once Bandou made that infuriating kissy face with his infuriating ass face, you went straight up to them and smacked him right across his face, leaving the others stunned. 

You looked at them with a raised eyebrow, silently challenging them. Chitose stepped up, about to say something, but Kamamoto grabbed him back.

Once you were sure none of them did anything, you walked right past them. Your face was heated up. A part of you was shocked that you actually smacked Bandou, that too in front of his friends. Another part of you was super embarrassed that you ended up giving that fuckboy a blowjob, which gave him the opportunity to brag about it to his fuckass friends. You don’t even know why you’re so angry, you knew this was something to be expected. Maybe it’s cause you actually found Bandou cute that night, or maybe it’s cause you lowkey ended up having a soft spot for him. Cause as annoying as he was, there was something endearing about him, especially with the way how he would nag about you being a bitch to him, but then immediately helping you with a coding problem that you didn’t understand without you even asking.

But that doesn’t matter now, since what’s done and done. Bandou Saburouta is just as much as an asshole as his friends, and you don’t want anything to do with that. 

Chitose

Before you had class with Chitose Yo, you knew exactly three things about him: 1. He’s pretty much the ringleader of all the fuckboys (it makes sense since he’s a finance major), 2. He briefly considered majoring in the liberal arts field just because it had more girls (you heard this one from one of your friends who hooked up with him last semester), and 3. He hooked up with the young T.A. of the required psychology class he had to take. Needless to say, that did not end pretty.

Being a part of the campus’ social scene, you’ve always heard about Chitose Yo and his womanizing ways. He was that one guy who was always surrounded by girls in parties, eventually leaving soon with his (victim) date. 

But you’ve never actually interacted with him until your Business Policy class. You weren’t surprised when he comes to class late, giving the professor a sheepish grin and grabbing the empty seat next to you. 

He didn’t notice your presence until the professor called out your name during attendance. You knew you were a goner once he turned to look at you, slowly checking you out with an infuriating (albeit, sexy) smirk on his face.

It took you approximately two classes to be charmed by him, and a party to sleep with him.

You guys become fuck buddies, and you become accustomed to the “you up?” texts he sends around 3 a.m. (obviously turns out to be full blown sexting between you two).

As much as you hate to admit it, you eventually catch feelings for him. Not only is he the best dick you ever had, he is a genuinely funny and charming person. 

Unfortunately for you though, Chitose is strict on his “stay away from relationships” rule. You know that if he ever finds out about your change in feelings, he will lose interest and cut all contact with you (and you honestly don’t think you’ll be able to take that), so you bottle it up and pretend not to care when you hear of him sleeping with someone else (this asshole even asked you to join him and this other girl for a threesome), or when he always chooses party and alcohol over you.

In the bright side (well, as bright as it can be), he’s at least honest with where you guys stand and doesn’t string you along. But you know that’s just bare minimum at this point.

You thought you were able to endure it all. But then that happened.

You guys were having sex when your roommate went out. And for once, he was actually being super romantic and soft with you. For a moment, you couldn’t help but think that maybe he’s finally coming around. But that all changes once called out a name that definitely was not yours.

Oh. Oh.

Needless to say, it got awkward real quick and you guys didn’t finish.

He admits to you that he called out his ex girlfriend’s name...His ex girlfriend from high school... Someone who he never got over, and how their breakup affected him a lot more than you thought.

“I’m sorry to hear that, but I think you should leave.” You don’t think you can do this anymore. Fortunately, Chitose does not fight back and immediately leaves.

This guy needs a therapist, but that’s not your job.

Dewa

So heres how it goes: you know Dewa through Chitose (who you were so close to having sex with but the party you guys were hooking up in was crashed by the R.A. (it was one of those small, congested parties held in a dorm)). And you know that he’s not your biggest fan since he thinks you share one brain cell with Chitose and all of his other girlie friends (doesn’t help that you once threw up in his favorite hat during a party)

That’s fine with you cause you don’t like guys who act like there’s a stick up their ass anyway.

Dewa is a different type from his friends. Where his friends were loud, obnoxious, and brass, Dewa has a superior complex in which he thinks he’s better than everyone else (honestly with that attitude, he might as well be part of the student govt. rather than a frat house). To this day, no one knows how him and Chitose are best friends. 

But you can’t deny that underneath his glasses and that ridiculous derpy hat, he’s hot. A different kind of hot from Chitose, but hot (and that you really wouldn’t mind riding him, but that’s a conversation for another day).

He’s one of the few students who actually knows what the fuck is going on in your accounting class, so you couldn’t help but swallow your pride and ask him to tutor you (unless you wanted to retake this class for the third time).

So you both agree to meet up in the campus’ library during the weekend when its more quiet than usual and there’s not that much people around, and you’re not sure how you feel about that (but it’s only an hour long tutoring session. You will be able to tolerate him for that long, right?).

So far, the tutoring session has been pretty surprisingly quiet, aside from a couple of snarky remarks from Dewa, which you chose to ignore (considering your temper and mouth, that is a feat and honestly, you deserve to treat yourself once the session ends). 

You were just about to think that maybe getting tutored by Dewa wasn’t so bad until you felt a warm hand slide up your thigh (you just had to wear shorts too, dammit).

You looked up at him in shock, only to see that he’s not even paying attention to you. Instead, his gaze was locked on your exam paper, and if it wasn’t for the hand on your thigh, you wouldn’t think he was interested in you. “Wow, you’re stupid. You seriously don’t know the difference between a balance sheet and an income statement? That’s some basic elementary shit right there,” he remarks in a bland tone.  

“Shut the fuck up, I already told you that I don’t fucking get this shit,” you snap back at him. But as you two were arguing, his hand keeps sliding higher and higher till you eventually reach over and stop his hand. 

Only then does he look up from the paper to glance at you. “I can leave if you’re not interested.”

You take a good look at him, wondering what he’s playing at. You decide to play along, eventually loosening up and letting his hand continue its journey. 

Throughout the session, he “rewards” you with a kiss on different parts of your body (from innocent places like the inside of your wrist to more dangerous places like your inner thigh), every time you get an answer right. It didn’t take that long for you both to end the session quick, immediately rushing over to his dorm. 

(And boy, did he look cute moaning underneath you while you rode the fuck out of him).

Maybe it was stupid of you to think otherwise, but you made the mistake of asking him about the next tutoring session, and how you guys can grab lunch right after.

The look he gave you made you feel like utter shit. “You don’t really think I’d go on a date with a girl like you, right? I thought I made it obvious that I have higher standards than Chitose.” 

Despite the angry tears threatening to drop (dammit, you promised yourself that you would never cry over a boy), you immediately slapped Dewa before quickly dressing up and getting the fuck out of his dorm. 

He’s not a fuckboy like his friends, but you’re beginning to think that he’s a lot worse.

Fuck him (and this time, not literally).

Eric 

Probably the more intimidating one out of his group since you don’t think you can ever recall him with a genuine smile on his face (and no, those sinister smirks don’t count). But that didn’t matter to a lot of girls, including you.

Despite his quiet and standoffish demeanor, Eric is noticed for his Eurocentric features, accent, and witty remarks. 

In your eyes, he fit the look of a European prince who has come to take you far, far away from everyone else and live happily ever after (yes, you’re in college, not in middle school).

You genuinely had a crush on him when you first saw him, but never had the guts to talk to him, let alone confess, since you’ve seen him coldly reject other girls (as much as you hate to admit it, you’re not good at dealing with rejection).

But you’re pretty sure you got over him since you now share an English literature class with him (you’re not sure why he’s even in this class if all he does is sleep) and actually got to know him. Somewhat.

Whenever you would participate in class discussions, whether it would be to discuss the current book you’re reading or to speak in english, you would always hear a smartass remark or question from him, which usually ends up with you looking dumb in front of the whole class. 

It especially doesn’t help that he stares you down while he calls you out on any mispronunciations you make. And you don’t think you’ve ever felt as self conscious as you do in this class because of him.

You do hate him for it but you don’t really stand up for yourself against him (he’s too intimidating and you like to pick your own battles). 

And to be fair, he’s probably just being an asshole. He doesn’t really know who you are (or care).

That’s what you thought until you go to the party thrown by his friends one night. 

And maybe it’s because of the alcohol in your system, but you immediately snap at him when he mocks your broken English accent.

So used to you not speaking back to him, Eric couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow before letting out a chuckle. “So she speaks!” he says in a sarcastic tone. But before you can reply, he immediately leans over and kisses you.

You won’t deny and claim that you never thought about kissing Eric, you’ve had way too many daydreams with him. But this kiss was nothing like the kiss you imagined in your daydreams. 

For someone who appears quiet and somewhat soft-spoken, Eric kisses rough, and it’s nowhere near romantic as you wanted it to be. His hands grip on to your shoulders tightly, before sliding over to your hips to pull you closer. You pull back from the kiss, in favor of placing kisses on his neck and collarbone.

(You didn’t imagine getting with Eric like this, but you weren’t going to let go of this opportunity, either).

He eventually pulled you into a nearby room, making sure to kick out the half naked couple that was on the bed. It wasn’t too long before he pounded into you while you were on your hands and knees.

Once it’s over, you were left staring at the ceiling while he puts his clothes back on. Without a word, he leaves the bedroom. 

So much for a prince charming, huh?

Fujishima

The Soft Boy™ 

Double majors in animal biology and zoology to become a vet for fuck’s sake.

You start talking to him cause he’s probably the softest and sweetest boy you’ve ever met, despite his appearance. 

But boy were you wrong (x2).

He listens to you attentively, offering kind words and good (generic) advice, assuring you that he’s nothing like those other boys (he’s lying, look at his friend group).

Tells you that unlike those other guys who want to fuck and dump you, he wants to get to know you and make love to you.

And everything is all fine and dandy until holy shit, you realize that this sweetheart you’ve been talking to, has a dark secret.

He’s a furry. 

A. Goddamn. Furry.

Legit has a fursona in the form of an Ethiopian wolf (hint: cause its red). But he also likes dabbling into mythology so sometimes he would take the form of a lycan.

You indulge his fantasies for a while, thinking that yeah it’s weird but at least he doesn’t have a foot fetish (but it is worse than a foot fetish) and how no one’s perfect.

You wear animal costumes to sex. At first, it starts out with pretty normal costumes like a playboy bunny. Then it starts to get weird and oddly specific with wolf costumes, roleplay scenarios as animals during mating session...

Once you were finally close to getting into a commitment with him, he starts acting funny.

When you let him know that you’re not super comfortable with your eccentric foreplay, he gets offended and starts sprouting bullshit about you being just like the other girls, which is so disappointing cause he thought you would be different and actually understand his rather…unconventional needs.

Needless to say, you ended up blocking him. You needed to preserve your sanity, after all. 

[cynicaljapanophile]

The Uchiha Family Modern AU Headcanons

I would like to say the only character that I really "know" is probably Sasuke and even when it comes to Sasuke my talent in writing him is probably -37 out of 5 

P.S. This has a bit of SasuHina, it's just hard for me to have a modern AU that features Sasuke without a bit of SasuHina, so if you're not into SasuHina sorry about that

Anyways I hope you guys enjoy this I’ve been thinking about doing some more family headcanons in a modern au so I just want to see what people think of these. 

_______________________

Madara Uchiha

Is probably in his 40s but looks like he is in his 20s

Shady Uncle

Is rich but gives weird presents

Disses the head of the Senju family 24/ 7

Is constantly stressing out Fugaku

Theorizes everything

Was probably married three times

Is an instigator

Uses Game of Thrones as a reason for him attempting to kill Hashirama

Only brings fruit cake around Christmas time

Eccentric Emo(??? Is that even a thing)

Whenever younger members of the Uchiha and Hyuga families(Itachi, Shisui, Itachi, Hinata, Hanabi, Neji, maybe Izumi sometimes, etc.) are feeling down he just randomly appears and gives an inspirational speech while simultaneously dissing them

He is banned from about nine restaurants in South Korea, three clothing stores in Canada, and twenty-three car dealerships in the U.S

Is banned from entering Romania

Probably owns 12 sports cars

9 out of the ten cars have probably never been used

Annoys Izuna 24/ 7

Probably has a group chat with Izuna, Fugaku, Tobirama, and Hashirama

He only sends memes(85% of the memes are sent to Izuna)

Izuna Uchiha

The uncle that everyone likes

No one hates him

How is he related to Madara?

Even Sasuke and Itachi question his relationship to Madara

Is the only functional adult

Owns a business in Tokyo

Low(High)key spoils his nieces and nephews

He is probably happily married

Lowkey roasts Madara and Fugaku

When Sasuke was going through his horse phase he legit bought Sasuke a Thoroughbred Horse

Itachi and Shisui's childhood treehouse looks like a condo because of him

Izumi also owns a mini "castle" because she was going through a princess phase

Shoots down 95% of Madara's ideas

Probably drives a family van

Is almost always

85% is because of Madara

Straight up BOIS people(it's usually Madara and Hashirama)

Gives Orochimaru dirty looks all the time

Is probably responsible for getting Madara banned from like 6 places

Will roast you to the edge of death if you disrespect any of friends and family

Fugaku Uchiha

The patriarch of the Uchiha family

CEO of Uchiha Tech.

Is a stereotypical traditional Asian dad

He has a net worth of like 21 billion USD

He probably views 100, 000 USD as like 10 USD

Probably gave his kids math and reading presents

Made Mikoto wear those headphone things that you put on your stomach when you're pregnant when she was pregnant with Itachi and Sasuke and just had them listen to classical music

Probably took away his kid's phones away from them if they got anything less than 95 marks

Gives Madara a judging look all the time

Questions everything Madara, Hashirama, and Jiraya a skeptical and dirty look all the time

Highkey disses Jiraya and Madara

He and Sasuke go back and forth dissing each other

Is the CEO of a multi-billion dollar company but is almost always home

Didn't learn how to drive until he was 26

Really only gets along with Izuna

Is stressed

Mikoto Uchiha

Wears the pants in the family

Is done with the shit of the men in her family

Is always straight up roasting Fugaku

Cried when Sasuke started high school

Spoke about Itachi like he was dead when Sasuke started high school

Is part of a book club

The book club hardly discusses books and all they do is talk about the neighborhood drama

Roasted Sasuke to death when he insulted Sakura and Ino

Gives Madara a judgemental stare all the time

Knows martial arts so do not mess with her

"Accidently," told Naruto about the time that Sasuke called his swimming teacher mom

Is a fan of YUI

Holds grudges

Would not speak to Madara for 2 whole months after a certain incident

Is that mom that everyone had a crush on boys and girls alike

Always suggests the family play Monopoly but is always the one that gets the maddest

Shisui Uchiha

Is in college

Is a college student but has literally no friends his own age

His only friends are probably people that are related to him(Sasuke and Itachi) and the Hyuga family(Neji, Hinata, and Hanabi)

The only friend he has that is actually his age(I know I said he doesn't have any friends his actual age but that doesn't matter now) is probably Ko and Ko is done with his bullsh*t

Is the dad friend

Only tells puns

Lives with Itachi in a dorm

Will roast battle people

Only watches dank memes

Acts like a dumb a** but gets some of the best grades of school

Has legit gone to the store to buy a candle and a lighter, waited for Itachi to come back to their dorm after classes and light the candle just to say that a party that they were going to go to was going to be lit

There is so much tension between him and Fugaku

Thinks Sasuke is cute

Is a weeb

Nico Nico Nii!!!

Loves Idols

Sleeps five minutes a week

Can someone please help this child

Makes excuses for not getting gifts

Will not even spend five bucks for a card

Has given Sasuke a piece of composition paper with Happy Birthday on it for his 10th birthday

Itachi Uchiha

Is a stereotypical older brother

He lives by the rule that every older sibling lives by which is to roast your younger sibling every day of their life

Gets a lot of sleep but always looks tired

Drinks around 93 liters of coffee a month

Works at the school library

Eats real food unlike Shisui

Lowkey disses Shisui

Roasts everyone he talks to

Visits home once a week

Is always annoyed by Madara

Eats about 5 fruit cakes during Christmas time

Teases Sasuke 24/ 7

Has written an itinerary that was solely him roasting Shisui

Is dead on the inside

Is on the dean's list

Has shown all of Sasuke's friends old family albums and has told all of Sasuke's friends embarrassing stories solely to embarrass him

Lives with Shisui

Is done with Shisui's sh*t

Only gives out money for birthdays and Christmas

Is a momma's boy

Is popular amongst girls

Has admitted that he learned everything he knows about women and how to speak and treat them from dating sims

Has driven from Tokyo all the way to Osaka with Shisui solely to leave him there

Will straight up roast you and your entire family if you disrespect women

Sasuke Uchiha

Lowkey hates his family

Is done with his dad, Itachi, Shisui, and Madara

Only likes Izuna and his mom

Despite saying he hates them he always wears the sweaters his mother makes

Only eats the bentos his mom makes him

Claims he hates his family but if you so as even mention any members of his family with a negative tone you will be traumatized

Someone said something about Shisui and the last thing people heard about them is that they transferred to a school in Hokkaido

Will roast anyone that comments that they find Mikoto attractive

Has a brother complex

Used to think that Shisui was cool

When he gets extremely annoyed by someone he will just give them a blank stare

His favorite uncle is basically everyone's favorite uncle, Izuna

Has a pet parrot

Is confused by Madara 93% of the time

Highkey crush on Hinata

Gets teased a lot by Itachi and Shisui for his crush

Overthinks everything

Still owns the horse that Izuna gave him when he was a kid

Has not gotten out of his horse phase

Will roast anyone who disrespects women to death

Takes monopoly way too seriously

He stopped talking to Shisui for a month after a game of Monopoly

Looks calm on the outside but is screaming on the inside

Is a conspiracy theorist

Doesn't really show it but gets embarrassed easily

He is just the baby of the family that acts aloof and emo but is just cute and precious