#like. to be ‘normal’ abt intrusive thoughts

[worfsbarmitzvah]

its crazy bc like. i Know that even the worst of my intrusive thoughts doesnt represent me. even when they occur in the most uncomfortable, offputting of situations. i KNOW it’s just my brain calling up whatever thing would be most horrifying to me at that moment. and yet i still feel like i cant talk about it bc of how other people who have never dealt with ocd would perceive it

[sunlitlemonade]

i want to write jason & natalia but head so scattered.....

[blackmoldmp3]

dont have to give myself a new mental disorder but many many ocd things ring true lol

[currentzconvulzive]

I hate intrusive thoughts bc mine swing between “hey imagine this unpleasant and painful thought” and “what if I’m (insert terrible type of person) and I just don’t know it? What if I’ve been one this whole time and I didn’t know it till now?” As if the first one is smth I want (I have a visceral or unpleasant reaction every time) and the second type isn’t just bullshit my brain is feeding me. Ah, yes, I’m this terrible thing bc my brain said “what if” even though I have a clear conscience and I’ve never had the desire to hurt another human of any age, race, or gender in any way, shape, or form.

[eileennatural]

weird question but does anyone else (feminine presenting) ever get like. paranoid about how they're being perceived when they're out like 1 on 1 with a male family member or am i the only person who as a teenager was repeatedly assumed to be married to my dad and now im terribly self-conscious about it

[nicepersondisorder]

curse you william james mo/riarty from m/t/p and curse your eye trauma 💔💔💔💔 dishonor on you and dishonor on your cow 💔💔💔

[shuenkio]

Thinking about | 니키 ❤️‍🔥.

Parring : Ni-ki X M!reader

Genre: Suggestive | Cw: 18+, handjob, curse, sexual tension.

Non proof read | Eng is not my 1st.

This is a work of fanfiction, do not throw unnecessary tantrums on this nsfw/sfw blog. ©Shuenkio

A/n: This is a fictional guy! Reminder. And so if you wish to see more of "thinking about -" just hit the comments 😜🥀

Imagine —

Boyfriend Ni-ki who is insanely fond of you, has a cute aggression whenever you breathe. Would take any chances he got to stare at your existence, and noticed how small you are to him, while on the other hand he was taller, older, bigger, in any way one can describe.

Intrusive thoughts win when Ni-ki finally gathers all the courage and shame to ask you for a size comparison, and you know very well what he referred to. Ni-ki has always been a naughty boy, making dirty jokes, Abt this and that which is quite normal. To the point of this, he was asking without saying, but wanted to compare dick size.

Who knows both had the same intentions, curiosity, to seek what underneath each other underwear to see who's bigger. Obviously when you pull it out, it is indeed average, 5 inches hard, not bad yet not as good as your lover. Not only was he massive, Larger than you can imagine, and what surprised you the most was you have never seen such a long length like this before, almost 9 inches. How did he hold all of that, darker shade of his fair skin, the way his balls clench, the sake full of essence was so sexy and hot.

"Love what you're gazing ? Hm?" A smirk was exchanged, a playful grin painted his small face, inviting you to join the ecstasy.

You gulp, nevertheless the desire was too strong to resist. You haven't tried it before, not even seen your boyfriend's cock ever until this moment. A big yes to the answer.

"What if I say— yes..."

"uhmm, gotta let your honest free darling don't keep it bottled up I like that haaa— you are staring too much, tsk why don't you go on and hold it ah it's so heavy" The words is like a scratch in the brain, as it hit you like a wooden log hit the bell. Did he mean it or was he just messing around? The goosebumps shrek and run on your skin, don't convince enough to do it.

"I- stop it.. you're joking! Right? Right?" You reassuring, it could be misunderstood if you just go ahead without a second thought?

Ni-ki got good giggles from it, by the way how you react to this whole situation. He just can't help it, even in this intimate heat he could still find you as adorable as ever. Gosh.

"I want it" Without further wasted, he grabs your wrist and shoves it to careless his gigantic cock. Hell warm, you feel the hot fever instantly by the contact. His cock— it was everything. Big, full, innocent, fresh but also a lil musky scent tho— and the way it's twitching and throbbing so hurt in your palm, It's not very healthy, might as well need a good stem off releasing.

"Shit— that's hot M/n what the fuck did you just do to me I'm so fucking hard— you need to pay the price love, don't leave me hanging" Ni-ki whimpers and melt on the spot with your bare minimum touch, that send thrill down to his spine, boy horny so hard his ass hole was twitches, clenching too .

You were there, witness and savor every moment, second and minute. Cuz this is once in a while to experience this. With all the eagerness and courage from your lover, you quickly act and wrap that tiny palm around his dick, which is barely full round of your palm, since he was too big, at least.

Stroke up and down — feel his tip disappear and expose, his foreskin is another thing to make your dick grow harder, jutting out higher, arousing and fucking shit.

Ni-ki lay his head down low, love this so much, he needs to bite his lip to stop himself to not cum too quickly. It's nothing but stroking, crystal clear— showing how much impact you had on him.

You move that pretty hand a lil more faster— the desire grows even better as Ni-ki arches his spine forward, seeking for more pleasure, He moans shamelessly, still having the strength to stand after all the suffering from this weak-willed.

You can't wait any longer, as you finally find his sweet spot— stroke him harder! Expose that pink glans wider — which was his fucking weakness and the way he'd coming undone without any control left in his veins.

"Oh—ah, wait you're pressing me idiot—!"

He came, the biggest load he’d ever shot, thick and overwhelming. It hit so hard it left him shaking, like his bones turned to jelly, pleasure tearing through him until everything went dark and he blacked out right there, mid-breath.

"I fucking addicted it now...I— I love you Ni-ki" yas.

"hell... Yeah..."

[xmoon1]

idk abt you guys but i feel awkward talking abt my fav roblox games to ppl ik. like, it's just weird saying 'oh yeah this one game I play has a character named BANHAMMER and he BANS ppl with his HAMMER' and it just sounds so fucking weird taken outta context. then I go listing off characters named fucking gosh darned 'KATANA' who has a KATANA and a FUCKIGN CHARACER NAMED 'SWORD' WHO HAS A SWORD HUGE SHOCKER. anyways there's this other character in this other game I play that's a gambler, and what are the chances (heh.)? their name is 'CHANCE' WHAAAAT WILD BRUH. ANYWAYS I also know this other character with an unpronounceable name (is that a word) named '07n7000n7dhw77e' whatever shit and he has a kid named c00lkid that wrangles ppl and think they're sleeping after he kills them. not c00l btw (heh.). this normal asf guys also there's THIS OTHER CHARACTER NAMED 'SHURIKEN' AND HE HAS SHURIKENS LMAOOOO WHATTTTT. also a guy named 'rocket' ig he has a FUCKIGN ROCKET. and guess what? there's this character named '1x1x1x1x1x1x1xx111x1x1x11111x1x1x1x11x' WHY ARE WE DOING MULTIPLICATION BRUH. and this guy named 'two time'. cus like. he has two lives. heh (edit: intrusive thoughts but do you think two time stands for multiplying something by two? like; two times three, four? no? ah, nevermind.) and FINALLY A FUCKING NORMAL NAME: 'JOHN DOE'. WHERE DID JOHN DOE COME FROM HUHHH??? AND THEN THERE'S LIKE. 'ELLIOT'. WHERE DID BOTH OF THOSE COME FROM BRUH. and uh. 'noob'. he's a noob. that's it. he's based off of a noob. that's it. what do you want. anyways there's another guy named 'shedletsky' ig. he has fried chicken and a iron sword ...anyways that's it lmao if you've actually read all that good job you get a gold star or smth.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

sending on anon cus im kinda embarrassed abt it

im a 16 yo transguy and i was just wondering what is the normal amount?? of libido for a person my age???

ive been on t for 4 years now and im starting to get a lil worried about how high my sex drive feels all the time. my doctor did say t increases sex drive but my hypochondriac ass is getting worried at midnight over if my sex drive is healthy dhsnh

ive never had sex and atm im not interested it in, but i do masturbate occasionally (ive read up a lot on safe masturbation practices like peeing afterwards and i try not to do it too often just because i have a whole slew of mental illnesses like depression and adhd and know i could get dependant on that dopamine boost) but recently ive been having sexual fantasies and sexually intrusive thoughts regarding people i know irl and i really just need to know if thats normal ( ´_ゝ`)

youve talked a lot on your blog abt safe sex ed practices for teenagers so im hoping you have some advice from me :')

-🥄

hi anon,

let me make sure I have all of the details here clear

you're 16

you've been on testosterone since you were 12

you aren't interested in partnered sex

you jack off "occasionally"

you have annoying sexual thoughts about people you know

you are describing maybe the most normal experience any 16 year old has ever had. there's literally nothing else I can say about this, absolutely nothing out of the ordinary is happening here. godspeed, soldier.

[omgitskaii]

guys im sorry idk if this is horrible to say cuz there was like a full season and a half worth of content but i wanted more moc!dean,,,,,,,,

IM SORRY but i want fics with dean dealing with the moc aftermath MONTHS AFTERWARDS. i want him perma effected by the mark. i want that hurt/comfort. i want dean winchester to be on a hunt months afterwards, even in like a season 12 or 13 setting, with dean just throwing away his weapon cuz he just got a flashback or an absolutely absurd intrusive thought when he looks over at cas and sam. and then he locks himself in his room cuz he cant just tell anyone. they'll think he's gone insane.

also deans time torturing people and getting tortured. and sam?? getting tortured too? ik people are saying the writers really brush off all the trauma, but bro. they totally just took the old scripts and lit them up and said "what trauma. they are all normal individuals!" we need to dive into it.

and also. i havent finished or gotten deep into season 13. but ik that dean basically. like. kills himself over cas. and i need fics abt that.i also need fics about how cas casually said hed kill himself in like, what, season 6? 7? idek. somewhere in earlier seasons. but that gets so brushed off.

i just need some hurt/comfort fics of the brothers. and of destiel. need it asap. need it dean centric tbh. need one of those rare, beautiful, poetic AO3 fanfics. those 1 of 1 chapters with 20k+ words. need those BEAUTIFUL works of angst. NEED IT ASAP!!!!!!!!!

[arikashimorika]

Oooo. the Color Gang being so young means they've probably latched onto Alan as some sort of parental figure, not definitive, but it'd be there. Esp TSC, though bc Alan and TSC spend more time together esp when animating, TSC might encounter Noogai. Though it'd be unlikely to happen too often. But regardless, due to these varuous factors and how they dont have other bigger influences other than the internet and Purple and Mango, Alan's behavior is basically normal for em.

DJ living with Alan... Now im just imagining there just being a bunch of sticky notes around the house for Alan to see just in case Noogai kicks in and causes him to forget. Sometimes(atleast in my experience, may be diff for others with DID), My alters can like manifest as voices in my head, undefined. I do know its them bc only bc theyre distinct voices. However this applied to Alan...

Alan definitely thinks Noogai providing commentary is simpky his intrusive thoughts, especially with how violent those thoughts would be if theres conflict that violence can be used in.

Also, the thing about Purple and Mango, Purple would notice but likely takes abit longer, Mango on the other hand would kinda clock in that Alan's behavior is weird, not exactly that Alan has DID, but that Alwn's behavior is just. Off.

Theres also Chosen and Dark! If ever Dark survives in this AU or not, i think he'd be insulted Alan remembers Chosen but not him /silly. Althought their reactions would be kinda on diff ends, in the end they're both likely experiencing some whiplash with how DIFFERENT Alan is now compared to then(in their own eyes.), unaware of Noogai(for now...)

The one im fascinated by the most is Victim's reaction however. Like how would he feel if the man that tortured him for months on end was somehow also not the same man yet is? And that man doesnt remember him at times but other times he can. That the person he sees behind the screen either looks so kind or so cruel you'd wish you escaped sooner. Idk im rambling again! hehehe

Stupid Alan and Noogai doodles bc theyre so funny to me. Noogai abt to juggle the sticks like in that one short here /j

He has done nothing wrong ever (LIAR.)

Oh! I’ve seen that. Those poor little kids, Lol

Continuing with questions about DID!AlanAU

I see.. the relationship between Alan and the Color Gang as being similar to someone taking care of "a friend’s kid" (yes, I mean you. DadyDJ). Perhaps DJ just wants Alan to take a break from work and do something lighter for a change.

Even though, sometimes, the result turns out to be the complete opposite... lol

As for Sec, I think he’s like a character Alan hasn’t fully created yet (because he hasn’t been named). But somehow, Sec "came to life" on his own. It’s fun to imagine Alan opening Sec’s file only to discover that his name has already been set as "The Second Coming.exe – The Chosen One's Return." That would definitely leave Alan confused, wouldn’t it?

With Alan’s tendency to be forgetful... yes, DJ sticks reminder notes everywhere Alan might see them—on the whiteboard in his office, the fridge, even on his computer screen. But Alan always takes them down, finding the sheer amount of notes overwhelming and annoying.

---

As for TCO and TDL, I’m not entirely sure about TDL’s fate in the canon, but in this AU, I want him to be alive. It doesn’t seem fair for him to bear the consequences of everything, especially when part of the chaos stemmed from Noogai’s command codes.

After The Showdown

After clearing things up, TCO occasionally visits TSC (sometimes dragging TDL along to apologize for the chaos they caused).

Of course, Noogai tries to stop TDL from harming the Color Gang, but it usually fails (it's kind of like Noogai thinking, Only I get to mess with those kids!).

The Moment Alan Encounters TCO and TDL Again

*Alan introduces TCO to the Color Gang*

TSC: "So, did you create TDL too?"

*Alan looks at them with a confused expression* Alan: "Who’s TDL?"

*The room falls into silence*

TDL unable to hold it in, shouted : "What the HELL kind of joke is this? Are you Kidding me?!"

*DJ, who had been listening from a distance, knew the reason but wasn’t sure how to explain.*

As for TCO, he is indeed a quiet person. Even though he caused quite a bit of trouble when he was first created, perhaps that’s partly due to the influence of the name Alan gave him—who knows? And I think it would be amusing to see TDL sulking at Alan for not remembering him, even though, deep down, TDL is the kind of person who’s too stubborn to openly express his feelings.

Extra scene..

Before the AVM Introduction Scene

DJ was sitting at his desk, playing Minecraft while uploading a video to the AVG (Animators vs. Games) channel.

Alan walked over, glancing at the screen with curiosity.

Alan: "Hey, buddy. What game are you playing?"

DJ turned to Alan, looking utterly shocked before blurting out:

DJ: "What?! You know every drawing program out there, but you don’t know Minecraft? Where was your childhood, man?!"

Not letting Alan off the hook, DJ immediately made him download Minecraft and try it out.

Thoughts on Alan:

To me, Alan wouldn’t have much of an enthusiastic reaction to Minecraft. In his childhood, he probably couldn’t afford the equipment needed to play games. Or, perhaps he just didn’t care about games, choosing instead to spend his time learning and finding ways to create a career for himself.

Alan’s Situation with Purple and Mango

Alan accidentally encounters them about a week after The Showdown...

*Purple and Mango appear after being invited by the Color Gang and Orange.*

As Alan finishes his work and prepares to head to bed, following DJ's advice...

Alan: "Uh… Dude, did you make two more kids?"

DJ (walking behind Alan to check on things): "Excuse me, What?!"

Thoughts on Alan: From my perspective, Alan sees all stick figures as mischievous kids (Color Gang) or troublemakers (The Chosen One and The Dark Lord). He never bothers asking about the age or details of Mango and Purple at all. lol

Victim's reaction however..

In AVA 9 'Wanted'

After the events of The Showdown, TCO was issued a warrant by Rocket Corp, while TDL was recovering from the battle with TSC.

As both were being hunted by mercenaries, TDL was caught first, while TCO managed to escape and seek refuge with the Orange and Color Gang.

After TSC was dragged into the portal by TCO, the Color Gang quickly followed suit.

Alan, concerned about the kids, decided to implement the backup plan he had prepared with DJ since the events of The Showdown.

...And BOOM!!

The backup plan involved using VR to connect with an avatar that was created (of course, all the equipment and avatar design were done entirely by DJ himself—don’t even ask where he got all the materials from; it’s DJ™ business).

This could allow Alan to meet Victim directly, but their first encounter will likely confuse both the kids and Victim when they meet Alan in avatar form, as they have only known each other from the perspective of the cursor (to Victim). Furthermore, Alan has kept this a secret between himself and DJ (to Color Gang).

Of course, DJ has started to worry about Color Gang, who are always looking for trouble. He’s already lectured them, but did the kids learn their lesson? Nope!

[jingyuanswallet]

Hihi umm now please don't take this as me excusing these people's actions because I completely agree, it is fucking gross and weird, however alot of people aho write this sort of stuff write it because they are unable to get professional help.

Unfortunately stuff like therapy can cost a shit ton of money and alot of people can't afford it, so they turn to social media to vent their feelings out.

Again I'm not trying to encourage these actions! If they need a way to vent their intrusive thoughts they could at least do it in their notes app where no one can see that stuff.. I just wanna let you know why some of these people write that shit and telling people to get help usually isn't helpful. (As someone who is regularly told to get help)

oh no! i totally understand people need to vent and rant and how therapists say stuff like "journal, it might help!" but that does not mean have people who do have issues like this to post it on a public setting. Posting things like that CAN and WILL have an affect on other people and can even have them relapse ESPECIALLY without the right tags ykwim? people dont come onto tumblr using a tag like jingyuan x reader to then see dad!jingyuan x daughter!reader. if you DO wanna make something like that, go onto Ao3 or Twitter because its EXCEPTED to be there yk? plus you have a lot more free will on those apps to make sure people who use world wide mostly normal content tags to not see fucked up shit like that. writing things like that can put others at risk and danger and what they're doing is just getting validation and being selfish. her case is NOT like other peoples cases so its hard to compare as hers is far worse considering shes writing those fan fictions because she has those feelings for her blood relative brother. which is scary and concerning, and her brother may be in danger because of it. yk? Also yes, she should 100% be doing this in notes app, its really sad how these things are being normalized and able to have literal children be exposed to things like that..which btw guys a child is not going to know that whatever they see in writing is not gonna be okay irl. its a child compared to an adult, and im talking abt 13+ kids not 17+. kids are going to thinks thats okay, especially by the comments and requests.

[mechs-headcanons]

*blasts marius and jonny with intrusive thoughts beam*

jonny has intrusive thoughts abt doing irreversible harm to the other mechs or them leaving like nastya did

and marius has intrusive thoughts abt them getting hurt in ways he couldve prevernted or just them getting badly hurt and him being unable to do anything abt it

both of them never mention their intrusice thoughts at all aggressively pretending they dont happen when talking to the other mechs

i think tim gets intrusive thoughts too but theyre way more normal abt it

-✨ who's totally not projecting a little bit what nooo

yES. i have super bad intrusive thoughts so. yeah.

[lakesbian]

can I please hear more about how sy and jamie don’t have the usual wildbow "no homo" vibe.

i'm extremely interested after seeing the quotes you pull out.

so when i call something a Wildbow No Homo Moment i'm referring to the moments where his writing demonstrates disdainful, spiteful, defensive insecurity about the idea of characters he's envisioned as straight being viewed as gay. when he did shit like write lisa literally turning to the camera after hugging taylor to tell people not to get the wrong idea & forum post about how all of the undersider girls are straight and "pandering is pandering," the clear message was that he thought characters being interpreted as gay would automatically ruin the meaning of their relationships: turn them into something cheapened and emotionally shallow, something silly and stupid and inferior to a normal, meaningful friendship between two normal, heterosexual women. it says a lot abt how he was viewing the idea of his characters being seen as gay (& obviously viewing gayness itself) as like. a grubby, vapid, self-centered, annoying intrusion onto his Well Written Female Friendships. it's fundamentally refusing to take the possibility of his main characters being gay seriously, and demonstrating that refusal by mocking and rejecting the possibility at every opportunity.

now to be clear. this isn't touching on the subject of whether or not we should get after wildbow for other complaints about jamie. but sy and jamie do not have that specific brand of wildbow no-homoing going on, at all. there's not that dripping spiteful insecurity about the idea of them being interpreted as gay--they're literally constantly holding hands, snuggling close, talking intimately together, etc., and it's never followed by sy turning to the camera and going "OH BOY I LOVE BEING HETEROSEXUAL AND SURE HOPE NO ONE INTERPRETS MY PLAYING FOOTSIE WITH JAMIE AS MEANING I'M GAY FOR HIM!" in fact, jamie is gay, and he is severely in love with sy, and it is taken as serious and meaningful and interesting and worthy of heavy narrative focus and emotional contemplation. you could call it bad taste in other ways, but sy being straight and confronted by The Difficulty of it is already not the same thing as wildbow blowing airhorns and going "fuck you for wanting to imagine characters as gay" every 3 seconds. also frankly sy sitting up for several hours at 2 am trying really hard to mentally turn himself gay for jamie is so. well i can't even call it funny even though it might sound that way in a void. but it's so Something that i'm inclined to grant wildbow clemency just to see more of whatever the fuck is going on with those two

[millionmaggots]

did/osdd/posdd/etc havers, can i mayhaps get ur opinion on something please?

i havent rlly been posting abt it bc the plural/system space online is HELLA SCARY with all the fakeclaiming n discourse n shit, but im realizing i proooobably have some kind of dissociative shit going on 😭

- can't remember the first 10 years of my life with any detail, then it gets a little clearer until age 15 or so when i can remember pretty well / maybe normally (idk what normal really is tho)

- i lose hours at a time

- i don't have distinct people in my head except for this one lady who's basically the ceo of violent / upsetting intrusive thoughts (i don't think i experience switching)

- but i do have a very disorganized train of thought, with a lot of different things going on at once / overlapping (i also have adhd tho)

- ive heard voices (that don't sound like me) on and off since i was like 8 or 9

- ^ i got tested for schizophrenia and i do not have it

- my parents get annoyed with me bc apparently i take / move their stuff, but i often have no memory of doing it, and little/no reason to have done it, despite evidence that i did. i usually just say that although i have no memory of doing it, i guess i did and im sorry. this one happens probably at least weekly and causes me a lot of distress bc it's scary being told that i did something i don't remember / wouldn't do

- people (esp my parents) sometimes tell me im acting off / different, and it's really confusing, bc as i see it, im always acting like myself

- i have a history of acute dissociation / depersonalization, especially when i was working a rlly stressful job

- i have an absolute dogshit short term / working memory

- i space out and fail to process things ALL THE TIME, especially auditory information. i need about 20% of everything said to me repeated.

- i get inexplicable feelings of dread from things i have no (conscious) emotional connection to

- i have cptsd symptoms and at least 2 distinct triggers associated with bad experiences ive had

- accidentally called myself a 'we' when talking to my psych? i remember everything about the appointment except the context around why i would've made that mistake

- like i said, i have adhd, and my adderall helps me focus, but doesn't do anything for my general inattentiveness / spacing out / forgetfulness

- my childhood was like. fine? in terms of like parents/housing/money/friends/etc, but i grew up not knowing my gender identity or that im disabled, and i had a severe undiagnosed anxiety disorder dismissed by adults as me being "shy" and "sensitive" so there was a constant ever present feeling that i was just inherently a bit off / wrong / broken

- nothing bad was directly done to me when i was little (as far as i know?) but i was, in hindsight, emotionally abused by my principal and homeroom teacher all throughout middle school (severe depression and anxiety, i was told to "stop being so negative" or i would be put in a different classroom without any of my friends <- the people who helped me and made me feel at least a little bit safe)

tl;dr: if anybody w osdd/did, etc, took the time to read all this, i would REEEEALLY appreciate u guys giving all this a sniff test 😭 not asking 4 a diagnosis obvs just kinda a peer review

i have a psych appointment abt this in about a month but in the meantime i would love to hear from systems who know abt this kind of thing. what do u guys think is up?

(PLEASE don't drag syscourse over here bc i know it'll just make everything im dealing with worse and more confusing /gen /srs)

[dogydayz]

Hello there! So I was looking at Sonic headcanons, and I’ve seen some people headcanon Sonic with neurodivergent tendencies like ADHD and such. Any personal headcanons with Scourge’s specifically? I feel like if he did had any, since he didn’t grow up with even basic acknowledgement from his father, a lot of his needs wouldn’t be met and thus develop unhealthy habits/coping mechanisms. Your thoughts on how his environment could’ve affected him as well?

Finally getting around to answering these I never even noticed I got asks! I'll talk specifically abt my interp of Scourge here, but some of this easily works for base canon too.

In my interps and backstory I've gone with for him, his dad wasn't actually bad, HOWEVER the person who truly caused the issues (Maxx) was extremely neglectful and outright abusive toward him (and emotionally manipulated and abused his father as well, under the guise of 'mentoring' him.). As a result, he very much has CPTSD from it, as well as very severe attachment issues (which I tend to write as a parallel to Fiona's own issues. In almost all of my work that isn't intended to be rather dismal, they work thru many of those troubles together. Their really REALLY strong passion for things and a want to actively defy the shit that's torn them down is part of why they're so willing to actually try to change themselves if it means getting a happy ending together. Also, they LOVE to spite folks who expected them to fall apart really fast.)

ANYWAY! Alongside this, my Scourge actually ends up with an eating disorder due to being back around Maxx while in prison, who basically uses the same methods of hurting him when he was a child to keep him under his own control, which included starving him basically aside from food he specifically would give him (which Scourge later would purge from himself as an act of defiance. An idiotic act, but still. It's understandable considering the sheer amount of stress he was going through at that time.)

I also project a shitload of my ADHD and OCD onto him, like an insane amount. He regularly deals with rather severe intrusive thoughts related to his past actions, effectively trying to pull him back in old unhealthy habits. I've also projected a lotta my old trichotillomania struggles onto him during his time in prison (in my interps, he was there for a year, and the rest of the gang ended up there half-way thru, so they were there for half a year.) He tends to have a lot of self-destructive habits, and also pretty serious dysmorphia that had pushed him to trying to transform himself in the first place.

Yes, almost all of my interps have some form of healing or 'good ending' for him. No, I don't give him a redemption arc so much as I do a healing arc. He never wants to be some 'hero', he still loves to fuck around and steal shit and start fights, but he does, in a way, improve, simply by fighting to actually have something that truly has brought him fulfillment..... Which are the people he has with him now.

I think it's pretty clear even in the comics that he's a mess. He overcompensates for shit, he's truly pathetic deep down, and the moment someone fights with words rather than fists he has a breakdown. Archie Comic Sonic is genuinely confident in his own capabilities, it would only make sense that Scourge isn't... But I also don't think he has to be completely doomed. He's meant to be like 18 at the end of the comics (mine is 19 in my interps), he's a teenager with absolutely zero good influence in his life, from a world that seems to have violence as a baseline for surviving. I know if I hadn't've had a good support system as a kid I would've ended up really fuckin' bad and I'm a normal person in a world where fantasy shit DOESN'T exist lmao.

anyway these are just my thoughts.