#listen. I used to be someone who had such a hard time validating my own opinions n letting them form to the point where it showed-

[cosmobrain00]

realized the depths of my hatred for fanon byler once again n it can always grow it seems

[ja3yun]

i am on a jay bender and have been obsessed more and more as the days go by. what do u think would he be like as a bf? 🥹

jay has been bias wrecking me like crazy and this will not be good for my health but lets go: again there is smut so mdni!!

jake vers. | sunghoon vers. | heeseung vers.

first and foremost, he is putting his soul effort into you from the moment of your first date. when he is looking for a girlfriend, its a long term deal, not a fling or a quick summer romance. jay dates to marry. it can come across a bit 'whoa' but listen, he wouldn't be overbearing about it! he just wants to know that when he finds a partner that the effort he puts in will be worth jt.

dates when you're in the talking stages/getting to know will be very thought out, each detail will be meticulously planned based on your interests. he would love taking you to museums, dinner, camping, i think any date in which he could sit down and speak to you would be ideal for him. jay values connection over everything else so getting to know you during these dates and momentsnare crucial.

once you are in a relationship he is all you could ever ask for!! he is supportive, loving, affectionate, headstrong, and everything in between. i can see him really working hard to maintain a positive and steady paced relationship. he won't rush into things, knowing that the relationship has infinite time to blossom and develop - it's like a good meal, you don't scoff it down but savour it.

although steady, he is affectionate and always with you any chance he gets. jay is sooo romantic, more romantic than any of the others. his heart is so big that he has infinite love to give you, he will work you around his schedule, no matter how tired, he will always make time out of his busy day to see you. if he is on tour or really can't see you for whatever reason, he is facetiming you or calling you.

more under cut

when he comes to visit you, this might be controversial bc a lot of people don't see him as a yapper but i think he tells you everything about his day, particularly how he felt about everything (tired, excited, whatever). i think he would feel so comfortable with you and trust you so much that he confides in you about everything. i do think he would hold some things back, just as a way not to worry you - like his knee, i think he would play it off as no big deal even if it hurt really bad that day; worrying you isn't on his list.

jay is so used to looking after others and independent that he is either going to go two ways: babying you or asking to be babied. if its the first one, i think it comes second nature to him, he would look after you and make a fuss, doing acts of service like tying your laces when they come undone, making sure you don't go overboard when drinking (i need him for that), and generally care about your well being. OR he is going to come to you to be looked after. he would want a partner sensitive to his feelings, someone who can have open conversations about them and validate him. something about him tells me that he likes to be pampered by his partner; sharing baths where you cuddle and wash him, massages, make him dinner when he has had a long schedule, i do think he would love a face mask night in w you. its all about give and take with him, but he definitely loves to give a lot more.

as i've mentioned, he is headstrong and has core values. if you don't allign, he will literally try and persuade you to see his side of things. he loves to argue and debate, not in a mean or offputting way but rather in a 'i have this opinion, tell me yours and we'll discuss it' kind of way. loves to learn and expand his mind regarding knowledge so if you are knowledgeable about the world or certain things, he would love to listen and learn, possibly going as far as researching the topic on his own time. again though, you aren't changing his mind on his values but he will understand your point if you share them in an articulate manner. if you respect his opinin, he will respect yours!

it is obvious but he is cooking for you!!! he will prepare your favourite meals and also let you venture something knew. he doesn't always like to do it on his own though and will set up fun little 'cooking classes' to teach you. he can be a bit bossy but it looks hot on him so you never mind it. you will buy him silly kitchen gags like 'kiss the chef' apron etc. which he hates but he wears because it makes you laugh.

will also play guitar on quiet nights in, just as backing music, not to impress you or gain attention. he would just strum the guitar while you read or whatever you like to do. it will be the backingtrack to your conversation and i think he would cherish the calm and easiness in the air.

you must get along with his family. no question about it, he is so close to them that if they didn't like you, it would really impact your relationship. i think he would try and persuade his parents and try his absolute hardest to help you all get along; he might plan meals or day trips with you all to bond you. same goes for your family, whatever parental/guardian/sibling you have, he wants to impress them and get along with them. he is a family man through and through.

speaking of which, would talk marriage and kids with you quite early on, just to establish if this is something you are wanting. i think for sure marriage has to be on the table but kids are a tricky one, i feel like he understands that it is you who would be carrying the child/or/adoption would always be a choice. it can't just be his decision, he loves you so much that he would settle for being an uncle rather than a dad if you truly didn't want children (please be real core <3)

kisses: i think he loves to kiss you but not randomly, like he won't grab your wrist and spin you around to lay a smooch, he is the type to nuzzle your nose and tell you how beautiful you look. his kisses are soft and gentle, his tongue tender against yours as he devours you completely. hands ALL OVER your body when he kisses, loves to feel you on his finger tips. secretly, along with quality time and gift giving, i think physical touch is a love language for him.

bowchikawowow: rough and sensual. jay is going to do everything you like because as your relationship grows, he is going to make sure that he knows every little pleasure point on your body. LOVES to hear you moan and encourages it. 'let me hear you, baby' and 'do you like that?' are constant sentences in the bedroom. doesn't do quickies, likes to go for as long as possible. he is terrible for edging you, pushing you to the edge of tears while he withdraws his touch, his smirk would be plastered on his face. he would tell you how good you are for him, 'just a little more, my baby can handle that, right?' and ofc you would say yes!! kisses all over your body, lips all over your chest and tummy, loves to just feel you (again, physical touch).

aftercare is so important to him but i think because he already likes to look after you, it would be so normal. makes you tea, kisses and cuddles, words of affection and admiration; whatever you need, he will do it!

again, these are my opinion and if you disagree you are more than welcome to let me know what you think!! i love hearing opinons 🙏🏻

[its-your-mind]

This is a call to action for all the PJO girlies (gender neutral) that I know are sleeper agents on this webbed site

Go read Trials of Apollo. Go do it. Do it right now.

I know what you’re thinking. “Tbh I didn’t love Rick’s writing towards the end of Heroes of Olympus” “There’s no Percy so why bother” “All of the Argo II crew are kinda OOC” and listen my friends. You are so valid to have those opinions. I felt the same way after Blood of Olympus. But listen to me. Look at me.

Now that you have had some time away, you must give these books another try. For me. For Uncle Rick. For the demon baby grain spirit who is only able to say his own name (Peaches).

Do not worry friends, I do not expect you to read just based on my say-so - I also provide:

A list of reasons why you (yes you) should go read the Trials of Apollo series right now gogogo:

(Spoiler warning - all broad plot things that you learn early on, but I know some people (including me) avoid that shit at all costs)

All the chapters are titled in bad haiku. Ya know that one scene in Titan’s Curse where Apollo just starts reciting apropos of nothing? That’s every chapter title. They’re all so bad it’s amazing.

Apollo is so up his own ass about everything, and it’s so cool to experience the same world through the eyes of someone who is not used to being in amongst the chaos

Oh yeah the plot. That’s a reason to read it.

Okay so

Basically Zeus continues his streak of being a shitty shit parent and decides to blame like… every bad thing that has happened on Apollo, and punish him by turning him mortal and enslaving him to a demigod girl named Meg who is a garbage gremlin with a little demon baby guard named Peaches (see above)

And like the A plot is they gotta save the oracles from shitty old Romans who wanna take over the world (stop me if you’ve heard this one before)

But like the B plot is about what it means to discover that you’ve fucked up, you’ve made mistakes, you’ve hurt people, and you gotta fucking own up to that shit

But also

You do not deserve to be punished for every horrible thing that has ever happened because of you, or even around you, and when a parental or authority figure in your life tells you that, they are an abuser and they are wrong

And yet

It can be so hard to fully separate yourself from them. Because for so long, they were all you had.

But that’s okay, because when you start to learn that the people who were supposed to care for you and love you were not actually doing that, there are people around you who will love you, who will support you, who will pick you up and hold you close and make sure you know that you are okay

And they can’t fix you

But they can give you the safe space to fix yourself

hmm that was an essay about themes and metaphors BUT THATS WHY YOU SHOULD READ IT

also there’s a wikipedia arrow who only speaks in Elizabethan prose (in all caps)

OH ALSO ALSO you get to see Will and Nico being a CUTE AS FUCK couple in the first book. Nico smiles. Also makes skeletons grow out of the ground when people annoy him. Fuck I love this little gay death boy so much.

AND. You get to see so MANY of your old friends. And they still! Get! Plot! And! Character! Development!! Even though they are only there for a little bit

OH OH OH there are two old lesbians who run a halfway house for people who are tangled up in magic shit with nowhere else to go

Did I mention Peaches? I did. He’s my favorite.

OH ALSO. This is “unreliable narrator” executed SO FUCKING WELL. Like, all narrators are unreliable. But Apollo used to be a FUCKING GOD. He has not had to deal with the reality of death all that much. He’s used to people praising his name and bowing down at his feet. But that ain’t happening!! And he is Unhappy about that!! But it also lets there be such a clear juxtaposition between what Apollo believes about himself and about the world and what is really true, which is such a wonderful way to write about recovery from trauma.

Ahem

Anyway it’s just real good Uncle Rick continues to knock it out of the park but he just did something different and we (at least I) needed some space from OG PJO fan brain before I could appreciate how fucking awesome this series is.

OH OH OH and if you like audiobooks Robbie Daymond (hello CR mutuals - yes, this is the one who is our beloved Blue Boi who we (Orym) so desperately need returned) is the audiobook narrator and he is. So fucking good. Absolutely NAILS the dramatic-ass-inner-monologue of this dramatic ass ex-deity. Also nails all the other voices as well. 15/10 audiobook narration I’m lichrally gonna go listen to other books JUST cuz he reads them.

okay why the fuck are you still here. GO. GET THESE BOOKS. If your public library does Libby you can absolutely get them on there. GO FORTH.

[giannan04]

Hiii, can you please write a Yandere San X reader fanfic? Maybe where he’s her therapist and he gets her to break up with her bf because he’s been obsessed with her? 🙏🏽make it dark pleaseee? Tyy in advance

Thanks for the request!💕🫶🏻I hope you like it, I tried to fit everything in the best I could 🥹🫶🏻I hope it’s dark enough for you 👀

-

Pairing: Therapist Yandere! Choi San x afab! Reader, Mention of Jung Wooyoung X afab! Reader

Genre: Yandere; thriller

Warnings: Manipulation, mentions of a toxic relationship, slight smut, character death, very slight gore.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT! 🔞

-

Dr. San Choi's reputation preceded him. He was the therapist everyone seemed to swear by. Patients praised his ability to get results where others failed, and he was known for treating some of the most complex mental health cases in the city. When your relationship with Wooyoung started having problems, your best friend Mingi suggested therapy. You were hesitant at first, but when he specifically recommended Dr. Choi, someone who had worked wonders for him, you decided to give it a try.

“Trust me, San’s the real deal,” Mingi said, leaning in with that serious look he gets when he really means something. “He helped me when I was going through one of the darkest periods in my life. If anyone’s gonna help you figure out what’s going on, it’s him.”

That’s how you found yourself meeting with San in his warmly lit office multiple times a week. From the start, Dr.Choi had a way of making you feel truly heard, like every word you said mattered. He never rushed through sessions and even went as far as canceling other appointments just so you could have more time when you needed it. He never told you that you were wrong, no matter how messy or complicated your relationship issues sounded. Instead, he listened with that same calm, reassuring expression that made you feel understood and validated. Over time, he even gave you his home address, offering to meet there if you ever needed to talk outside of office hours. You didn’t think much of it—you just figured he was incredibly dedicated to his work and to helping you through this tough time.

Over the weeks, San subtly guided you into believing that your relationship was toxic, that Wooyoung was holding you back. He never said it outright; instead, he asked questions that made you second-guess everything. "Do you feel like you're truly happy?" he'd ask, his voice gentle but insistent. "Sometimes, we stay in situations because we're afraid of being alone, not because they're right for us." Little by little, you found yourself reexamining your relationship with Wooyoung.

San’s advice seemed to play on repeat whenever you fought with Wooyoung. The tension between you two had been getting worse for months, with minor disagreements escalating into major arguments. Every time you argued with Wooyoung, you couldn’t shake the feeling that San’s words were right there with you. Even though part of you still hoped things could improve, the truth was hard to ignore: deep down, you knew San was right, there was no saving your relationship. It felt like there was no way to fix what had become broken, despite your hopes that things could somehow get better.

One night, after another argument left you in tears, you found yourself at San's apartment instead of your own. You needed someone to talk to, and San was the first person you could think of. You had caught Wooyoung with another girl, and you didn’t want to be alone. You needed to let everything out. Your heart was broken, and you know the only person you could talk to was San. You hadn't planned on it, but he'd always offered you to come to his place,and before you knew it, there you were, standing outside his front door.

When San opened the door, pleasantly surprised to see you. His brows furrowed as he glanced at his watch. “Y/N? What happened? It’s almost midnight,” he asked, concern replacing the confusion in his eyes as he noticed that you were sobbing. Tears covered your face, and you were so hurt and anxious that you were shaking. San’s heart broke seeing you like that. Without hesitation, his expression softened, and he gently took your trembling hand. “Come in,” he said, his voice soothing as he pulled you into the safety of his home.

You sat on his couch, trying to hold back more tears as you told him everything—how you found Wooyoung with another girl, how you felt like your relationship was falling apart. San listened intently, never taking his eyes off you, nodding with genuine empathy. When you finished, San leaned in closer, brushing a tear off your cheek with his thumb. “You deserve so much better than this, Y/N,” he whispered, his voice low and comforting. “You deserve someone who would never even think of hurting you like that. Someone who truly values you.”

You felt a blush rise to your cheeks at his words and the way his hand lingered on your face, the soft caress sending a warmth through you that you hadn’t felt in a long time. His touch was tender yet firm, making you feel safe; cared for. You haven’t felt that way in a while. You caught your breath as he leaned in just a bit closer, his other hand gently resting on your thigh, as if waiting for your permission. “I can show you what it feels like to be treated right,” he murmured, his gaze darkening with desire. Despite the hesitation you felt at the back of your mind, you couldn’t deny the lust and attraction you felt in that moment. You leaned into his touch, your body responding before your thoughts could catch up.

His lips were dangerously close now, and there was no more space between you. All the tension, all the confusion, all the heartbreak you were feeling—everything faded away as his hands slid further up your skirt, placing his hands on your ass, pulling you into him with a gentle firmness that felt intoxicating. “Let me take care of you, Y/N,” San whispered, his words making your body tingle and heart flutter. And before you could even think to resist, you found yourself nodding, your body betraying you. In your head, you knew this was wrong, but your body felt so right. And you needed, no, deserved to be loved and cared for. It was about damn time.

“I want you, San… I need you. Please, take care of me,” you told him softly, never looking away from his brown almond-shaped eyes. That was all San needed to hear-the very words he had been waiting for since the moment you stepped into his office. San smirked, as he began undressing you with a deliberate slowness, savoring every second. He took in each sight of your beautiful body, pleased that it belonged to him.Before you knew it, he was fucking you right there in his living room, each touch, each kiss, each thrust leaving you wanting more. For the first time in months, Wooyoung and your relationship problems vanished from your mind, replaced by the warm sensation of San's hands on your body, the way he whispered your name like a prayer. The way his dick filled you up, the way he kissed your body was he made love to you.

The only things you were thinking about was how you never wanted San to stop making love to you. And San knew, finally… you belonged to him. San's hands rested possessively on your waist as he thrusted deeper and deeper inside you, your ass slapping against his thighs. You moaned uncontrollably, never wanting him to stop. You wanted to show him he had complete control over you. San’s eyes never left the sight of you, he loved seeing what a slut you could be for him, and how only he could make you feel this way. Smirking, he bent down close to your ear, whispered sweetly to you. "See? You feel it, don't you? How good we are together. You don't need him, Y/N. I'm the one who understands you, who can give you everything you’ve ever wanted, and more. Only I can make you feel this way. You belong to me, and I’m never letting you go."

The next morning, sunlight peeked through the curtains, but the warmth in the living room felt oddly suffocating. You noticed a heavy blanket was draped over your naked body. You must have fallen asleep after what happened last night, so San must’ve brought a blanket out for you. You glanced over and San was still lying beside you, sleeping peacefully. His arm was wrapped tightly around your waist. Yawning, you reached for your phone which was on the floor next to you. You unlocked your phone, and your heart nearly skipped a beat when you saw a text from Wooyoung: I know I fucked up. But I love you. And I want us to work on things. I don’t want to lose you. Let me know when you’re ready to talk.

Your heart fluttered with a sense of hope, but before you could respond to the text, you felt San's eyes boring into you. You looked up at him, not realizing how closely he was watching your every move. You didn’t even hear him wake up. His expression remained calm, but the slight clenching of his jaw told you everything. He was furious. He must’ve seen you open the message on your phone when he woke up.

"Oh. Wooyoung texted me. He wants to fix things," you said, a little too eagerly, not noticing the anger settling into San's expression.

San's smile didn't quite reach his eyes as he leaned in to kiss your forehead.

"That's... nice," he murmured, though his voice didn’t reflect that. He actually sounded pissed, but you could tell he wasn’t trying to show it. San stood up, wrapping the blanket around him as he walked towards his bedroom. “I have to get dressed. You can stay here as long as you need, Y/N. I actually have to head out for another appointment, but make yourself at home, alright?"

You nodded. “Okay, thank you,” you said sweetly, ignoring the tension.

San drove in silence, his knuckles white as he gripped the steering wheel. He replayed your excitement over Wooyoung's text in his mind, a bitter taste settling on his tongue. How could you be so blind? After everything he had done to get you away from Wooyoung, after showing you what real love felt like, you still had the nerve to be excited about that cheating scumbag reaching out! Pissed off didn’t even begin to describe how San felt. He was so angry his eyes twitched and his hands shook as he drove. He had to do something, he was about to have you all to himself until that mother fucker sent you that text.

His thoughts darkened further as he arrived at the home you shared with Wooyoung. His plan formed in his mind, making him feel only a little better. He knocked on the door, his face wearing the mask of a friendly, concerned therapist. Really, he was the furious therapist who wanted to fuck somebody up.

Wooyoung opened the door, blinking in surprise. "San? Aren't you YIN's therapist?"

San let out a cheerful laugh. "Yeah, I am! My office is getting renovated, so I thought I'd stop by and see how things are going. I know Y/ N's been having a tough time, and I wanted to touch base."

Wooyoung relaxed slightly, shrugging. "She's not here right now, but come in. We can talk about how she's been doing. Ive been wanting to talk to you, anyway. Maybe you can give me some insight."

San stepped inside, carefully observing every detail of the house, the place where you once tried to build a future with someone who never deserved you. They moved throughout the home and as Wooyoung started talking, San could feel his blood boiling but he knew he had to remain calm. Wooyoung would get what he deserved shortly.

Wooyoung led San into the kitchen and pulled out a bottle of bourbon. “Want some?” he asked, holding the bottle up. “No, thank you. I’m just here under professional circumstances” San smiled, watching as Wooyoung shrugged and opened the bottle. “Suit yourself,” he said, taking a sip. San and Wooyoung sat at the table, ready to discuss sessions. Which was what San wanted Wooyoung to think, anyway.

"Ever since she started therapy, it's like she's blowing everything out of proportion.

She's been acting like our problems are way bigger than they actually are, like she's ooking for an excuse to leave. I don't know, man... it feels like she's being pushed into seeing the worst in me." Wooyoung stared long and hard at San.

San's eyes darkened, his smile slipping for just a moment as he watched Wooyoung ramble on. How dare he accuse him of manipulating you? Wooyoung was the one who had been lying to you, hurting you, cheating on you, and who knows what else. Hell, this dick was the whole reason you needed therapy in the first place! And yet here he was, acting like the victim.

"You really think so?" San's voice was low, dangerous. He took a step closer to Wooyoung, who didn't seem to notice the shift in San's tone.

"Yeah, it's like she's-" Wooyoung was cut off by the sudden pressure of San's hand around his neck. Panic flashed in Wooyoung's eyes as he struggled against San’s grip.

“San, what…what the hell are you doing?" Wooyoung croaked, trying to break himself free. He managed to break out of the hold, shoving San back with surprising strength, but San's fury was beyond reason now. The therapist quickly regained control, his movements turning brutal as he rained down punches, each one fueled by the sickening memories of everything Wooyoung had done to hurt you.

"This is for Y/N," San hissed between clenched teeth, his eyes wild as he struck Wooyoung with relentless force. San began to stop on Wooyoung, not caring that his blood was getting thrown into the air.

"For every tear she shed because of you."

Wooyoung's resistance weakened as blood dripped from his split lips and broken nose. San's breaths were ragged as he lifted Wooyoung's head by his hair, glaring into his fading eyes. “Pl-please, man…don’t do this. I love Y/n. I never hurt her that much. Believe me”, Wooyoung tears mixed with the blood covering his face satisfied San beyond reason. “Sorry, but with you gone, Y/n will be happier. If you really loved her, you wouldn’t mind dying.” With a final surge of strength, San twisted his hand, the sickening crack of Wooyoung's neck snapping echoing in the room as he tore his head clean off.

The lifeless expression on Wooyoung's face was frozen in terror as San calmly wiped his hands on a towel he found in the kitchen. The sight of Wooyoung's head dangling by his fingers didn't faze him-in fact, he was feeling a sense of satisfaction

San returned to his apartment, already mentally preparing to tell you to ignore Wooyoung’s text, that he didn’t deserve you. But when he entered his home, he found you pacing the living room, your phone clutched tightly in your hand.

"San, I've been thinking... maybe I should give Wooyoung another chance," you blurted out. You didn't notice how San's entire demeanor shifted, his smile growing unnervingly cold.

"Why would you even consider that, Y/N?" San's voice was sharper than you expected, laced with barely-contained fury. You thought your therapist would’ve been happy for you, that you were ready to work things out. “After everything he's put you through, why would you care? Especially after what we did last night."

His words cut through you like ice. You hadn't anticipated such a strong reaction from him. Your face turned bright red and you avoided his gaze. "I... I don't know. I guess I was just confused. I just wanted to feel loved but I’m in love with Wooyoung, and it’s hard to let go of someone you cared about for so long."

San's eyes narrowed, his patience thinning. "You shouldn't have even cared when he texted you. Do you think that was fair to me? Letting me be the one to comfort you, only to get excited over him? And then you let me fuck you-" His words dripped with venom as his eyes blazed with barely-restrained anger. “You’re a worthless whore. Disgusting… I don’t know how I’m even looking at you right now. I shouldn’t have felt bad for you all of those times you came to my office, crying about him. You deserve to be treated like shit!”, his words dripped with venom, his face turning red as he screamed in your face. Your ears throbbed and you broke down in tears. San was scaring you, and the things he was saying to you hurt.

You took a step back, sobs shaking your body. San... I didn't mean for things to get so complicated… please stop yelling at me, you’re scaring me!,” you put your hands in front of your face, just in case he was going to starting hitting you.

San's expression hardened, and without another word, he grabbed your hand, pulling you toward the living room. "I think it's time I show you something, Y/n.

You nodded, unsure of what he had to show you. For some reason, there was a feeling in your stomach, a gut feeling. Something was off. The unease grew as he led you to a trash bag that was sitting in front of the front door. “What’s that?,” you asked, confused. Why on earth was he showing you a trash bag? Did he want you to take the garbage out?

San laughed, but it wasn’t humorous. With a single swift motion, San tore the trash bag open, revealing the gruesome sight inside.

Wooyoung's severed head stared back at you, lifeless eyes wide open in horror. His olive skin had turn a sickly gray color, and a stench burned your nose. Your breath caught in your throat as you stumbled back, terror freezing you in place. You screamed, your hands covering your eyes as you dropped to the floor. “Why… why would you do this?”, you covered your face, as you choked on snot and tears. Your body shook and between the crying, the smell of rotting flesh, and the sight of the love of your life’s body-less head was all too much. You stared up at San. Someone you trusted with your problems, someone you felt safe with, was a monster. San looked at you, a twisted grin on his face.

"Now, Y/N, tell me... are you still confused about who really cares about you?"

-

I’m still taking requests everyone, I’ll write anything🫶🏻❤️

[markscherz]

I just wanted to give you some context for the anonymous ask you got about Tumblr CEO being a transphobe. The user who got banned, predstrogen, had been publicly posting about frustration over content moderation and non-sexual posts about her transition getting marked as mature content. Those were valid concerns and should be talked about. Unfortunately, she (predstrogen) also publicly posted a death threat against Matt (the CEO). The death threat was the inciting factor for the account being shut down, not her other posts. Notably, Matt is not involved in content moderation on the site and did not make decisions regarding the moderation of her posts. He only became involved after she posted the death threat.

I do not believe that he has handled this situation as well as it could have been handled. Predstrogen hasn't, either. However, I haven't seen anything in his behavior that comes across to me, a nonbinary trans person, as specifically transphobic. (Obviously that doesn't give me the last word on whether or not somebody is transphobic or whether his behavior may or may not be hurtful to some trans people; I'm just saying that the things he said do not appear to *me*, someone who has often been hurt or offended by transphobic behavior, to be overtly or implicitly transphobic.)

I could go on and on with details, but Curated Tumblr on Reddit has some detailed threads about this situation if you want more information: https://www.reddit.com/r/CuratedTumblr/comments/1avbp78/tumblr_bans_trans_woman_over_looney_toonslevel/

Thank you, Anon. From the reading I did before I posted my answer to that ask, I could also see that there is clearly more subtlety to the specific situation than a simple question of blanket transphobia, or a simple case of violation of TOS/guidelines. I really appreciate your insights and perspective here, and especially you highlighting the importance of a well-informed and carefully considered reading. Also emphasis on the separation of Church and State Moderation and Management at Tumblr; it is an important aspect. That Reddit post you link to really collates the information well, and some of the comments bring critically important context (both specific and broad) to the discussion; thank you for that. As you say, I think it is evident that the situation has been poorly handled by both parties, and consequently has also escalated. It was handled worse than I had thought, before I read that post. There were several audible 'yikes'-es muttered as I read through it.

Nevertheless, I also think it should be said that this is not an isolated incident (neither on tumblr, nor on social media platforms in general), and I felt it is important and timely for me to use my voice here to be explicit in (1) my dislike for disproportionate use of sanctions against users targeting staff relative to their typical handling of threats and other reports made among the community, and (2) my support for the trans community here and elsewhere.

On Twitter it would also often proceed like this, with people finding themselves in holes of their own making digging deeper, rather than realising that the ladder out consisted of listening, reflecting, apologising, committing to and visibly striving for improvement. This is a *hard* thing to realise when you are in the middle of it, and you often see people crash and burn this way.

[the-travelling-witch]

𝐇𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐥𝐲 𝐒𝐢𝐧𝐬

Riddle :: Wrath

A tiny spark is all it takes to ignite a fire that burns blindingly bright. If they won’t respect you and the rules on their own, you’ll just have to make them listen. After all, your wrath is justified, you are in the right here. It’s not you who is blinded, it’s everyone else who just can’t see.

Leona :: Sloth

Work smart not hard. Or don’t work at all; let someone else do the heavy lifting to get their hands dirty. And why not? After all, lazing around in the sun is what you deserve after being the brain behind this whole operation. There’s really no need to exert yourself when someone else can get it done too. Being awake, being asleep, what difference does it make? Why put in the effort when you will always be second best anyway?

Azul :: Greed

What’s so wrong with wanting it all? And who cares if you’ll ever find use for any of it, it’s more important that you could. Whether it’s money, knowledge or power, more is better and your desire to have more of it is valid. Avarice and success are two sides of the same coin and it’s golden gleam is oh so enticing.

Kalim :: Lust

Don’t think too hard about what pains you, just close your eyes and focus on what makes you happy. It’s so much easier than plaguing yourself with arduous topics such as betrayal and intrigues. It’s okay if the world is burning as long as it’s at your fingertips, so just indulge a little. Ignorance is bliss and bliss is what makes life fun, right?

Vil :: Gluttony

Never satisfied, never sated, you crave improvement the same way a starving man craves food and water. When you finally achieve something you have meticulously worked towards, there is no time to rest on your laurels, your eyes are already fixed on a new way to make yourself better, more beautiful, all in a never ending hunger for unreachable perfection. Would you be satisfied with being the fairest one of all?

Idia :: Envy

Sure, you’ve had some achievements in the fields you’re interested in but what else do you have going for yourself, nerd? This one remarkable trait aside, who’d be impressed by the rest of you? And it’s oh so easy too, to compare yourself with the people around you and the people you see online, only to find that you just don’t measure up. You’re envious of the people with normal lives, who get to choose what they want to do, who aren’t stuck and who easily fit in. Maybe you’re even envious of your past, where everything was still alright and within reach.

Malleus :: Pride

Being proud isn’t wrong, is it? Surely, everyone would feel that way if they were you. Just look at what you can effortlessly achieve, whereas others struggle so much with it. But you realise maybe too late that pride is often accompanied by solitude. After all, you don’t need anyone by your side, so why would anyone be willing to stand there? At the end of it all, you are too proud to lose to someone and too lonely to lose someone.

Yuu :: The Deadliest Sin

You know you’re doing it again. You just can't stop, can you? Sitting hunched over like an invertebrate when you really should know better. Have you eaten anything yet, drank enough water? Seen the sun, taken a walk and gotten enough sleep? I thought so. The time will come where you must answer for your sins, so don’t add to the tally.

© the-travelling-witch 2024 - do not repost, translate, copy or edit

if you like my content, reblogs, comments and asks are always much appreciated (also, yes, there will be second parts for the characters) ♡

twisted wonderland masterlist || join my twst discord server :]

➺ send in an ask to be added to or removed from my tag list

twisted wonderland: @savanaclaw1996 @honehbee42

[spencerreidsbookfairy]

you made me miserable

guys, this is short im sorry buuut i could make it up to you by writing the teams reaction to the songs?? fair deal? I think so

1 month.

It had been one month of no contact with Spencer. I've been declining his calls, hell i've even ignored him when i heard him knocking at my door thank god i wasn't at that level of popularity where paparazzi follows me everywhere. Hm. I wonder if his team has mocked me for that too. I can already imagine it, it's almost hilarious.

Anyway 

I've written three songs about him about them not because they won because i wanna humiliate them have the internet speculate who the songs are about (even though they'll never know its him) 

Some thoughts cross my mind as i begin to upload the tracks 

Am I being dramatic? I mean the internet has said worse, maybe i should sleep on it-

No

No no no y/n stop it your feelings are valid i think to myself. I impulsively upload the tracks to all websites 

Track 1 : snow angel

Track 2: lost cause 

Track 3: happier than ever.

The main parts of each song is the part i want him to hear, for example

Snow angel: I tried so hard

I came so far

I met a boy

He broke my heart

I blame him 'cause

It's easier

Track 2: lost cause 

I used to think you were shy

But maybe you just had nothing on your mind

Maybe you were thinkin' 'bout yourself all the time

I used to wish you were mine

But that was way before I realized

Someone like you would always be so easy to find

So easy (so easy)

He-hee, mm-mm-mm, mm

Gave me no flowers

Wish I didn't care

You'd been gone for hours

Could be anywhere

Ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah

Track 3 : happier than ever 

You call me again, drunk in your Benz

Driving home under the influence

You scared me to death, but I'm wasting my breath

'Cause you only listen to your fucking friends

I don't relate to you

I don't relate to you, no

'Cause I'd never treat me this shitty

You made me hate this city

And I don't talk shit about you on the internet

Never told anyone anything bad

'Cause that shit's embarrassing, you were my everything

And all that you did was make me fucking sad

So don't waste the time I don't have

And don't try to make me feel bad

I could talk about every time that you showed up on time

But I'd have an empty line 'cause you never did

Never paid any mind to my mother or friends

So I shut 'em all out for you 'cause I was a kid

You ruined everything good

Always said you were misunderstood

Made all my moments your own

Just fucking leave me alone

Now…was spencer ever driving drunk in his car??? No was he just sitting in his car drinking while he called you complaining about how he fucked up and misses me?? Yess

And now we wait.

[paintaboveyourbones]

That time Marius had a prolonged depressive anxiety attack and changed a 12 year old also this is a pro-Marius blog

Thinking about that time, Armand suddenly showed up from the dead to visit Lestat when he was embracing his ✨ religious stupor aesthetic ✨ , and Marius proceeded to embarrass himself by following Armand around and inviting him back to his place to chill or whatever THREE GODDAMN TIMES IN A ROW and got shot down for all of them! Amazing!

Marius : Wanna come over? Armand : Lol no :)

it gets worse

Hahah like wanna come back to my place? No? Oh that’s cool. Listen my house is so cool here it’s all Roman and stuff, you’d love it if you saw it? Oh? You don’t want to see it right now? Oh, uh uh. Um, what if like, I promise to be a good listener and not interrupt? You could, you could stay for as long as you like! He's such a simp

And Armand is literally looking at his raggedy dusty clothes and kinda gives him a little pat on the hand and gives him his best “oh yeah, I’ll be by later! Totally!” And in the very next sentence, he’s thinking, “I gotta grab my kids and get the fuck out."

You think I'm exaggerating - how I only wish that were the case! It's so painful to see him suffer.

But beyond pain, the thing that I love about this is how much of a shock this is to both of them. Anne gives us all these excellent context clues that show us MARIUS HAS NOT BEEN OK! ALRIGHT - HE'S GOING THROUGH IT. Like, in my head, he's still trying to process what happened with Akasha - and part of that will inevitably go back to his own failure with Armand. And that failure is multifaceted and painful for him because he's been the cause of so much of it.

Obviously, there's all the stuff with Armand that directly echoes his failures with Pandora. I'm thinking specifically of him flying into a rage just because she mentions she saw the apostle Paul out preaching, and of course, there are the beginnings of the Roman coven. And then Christianity deals the death blow again when Armand falls into the cult. He has a proper pagan disdain for it, and I don't want to minimize the validity of his fear surrounding it and how religious trauma of all varieties has had a hand in shaping his neurosis.

Marius has always been so proud of his reason, but he's drawn again and again to these people who are more spiritual or untamed than he is. And part of this is his wanting to emotionally and intellectually dominate them. He wants so BADLY for someone to go, "Yes, Marius, you're right! Your superior Roman reason has shown me the way!". Because then he's validated as the superior Roman scholar for once, and not some half-breed Barbarian adopted into a proper Roman family by his father. But I can't help but think the other part is he's so attracted to their complete sense of comfort and acceptance of these illogical parts of themselves.

Like Pandora, Mael, and Armand are all so spiritual. And I know I've made the joke about him being the Reddit Atheist Guy falling for the Coexist bumper sticker girlies, but it's true! I'm not saying that any of them don't struggle with their faith or delight all the time in the sacrifices it asks of them, but they never question it as a part of themselves. And that's the thing - faith IS illogical. It requires us to take leaps we can't explain and carry on when there's no proof of reward or empirical evidence to give us peace of mind. And the fact that all three of them are ok with this just drives him FUCKING BUG NUTS. I also can't help but think some of this goes back to his Mommy Issues and how he works so hard to scrub his mother's barbarian identity from himself

And all that is there in Armand! And whatever might have happened is a wash, because obviously the coven comes and breaks them apart. But the funny thing is AKASHA also has a hand in it. At the time, Marius accepts it for what it was. But, in retrospect, after everything that happened? How fucking bitter is that pill to swallow that Armand became one of the things he had to give up, and all he got was a mouth full of ashes in reward.

And it's so clear they're both so hurt and awkward around one another! When we see them in Night Island, it's Santino Armand’s playing chess with - not Marius. It's no wonder that, of the two, he's the easier bridge to mend.

I can't help but think that, before Armand burned himself in the sun, Marius had convinced himself that he was still perfectly in control and ready to face what came next with stocism and rationality. Then Armand gets crisped up, and that's finally the catalyst for things to break apart.

It reminds me of this thing I was listening to recently about a pet bereavement therapist who mentioned that almost inevitably, when people talk about pet death, they talk about the death of a loved one that also hasn't been mourned or processed. And Marius does treat Armand like a pet - and Armand's death is the damn break for everything else that's happened with Akasha. Hence, we get Marius wearing rags, covered in dust, turning Benji and Sybelle. He's so painfully out of control - he's spiraling and returning to his old pattern of leaning on Armand and putting him back in that place where he's responsible for Marius' emotional well-being again. Only this time, he's not a fucking child (even though Marius greets him by calling him 'young one").

This entire time, he's softly rebuffing Marius, refusing to do the heavy lifting for him, he's finding his footing! My heart is beaming with pride because he's finally putting the pieces together! He's not Marius' emotional support pet anymore!

Hence why I think we get this line :

There's always this scary part when you're getting out of codependency where you realize the possibility of going back to old habits is always there. And that's tempting! Focusing on healing doesn't mean these things stop being temping - it just means you find better ways to work around that temptation.

And, of course, this just does not compute for Marius. And to be fair, that makes sense - historically Armand has always wanted to be a slave for something or someone. So seeing him come back from the fire, changed and changing, even if it's just shakey baby steps, has to be so devastating. Because, at this point, it's one more person outgrowing and changing beyond him. And everything that he's held onto at this point to justify his lack of change and growth has just been burnt to the ground.

So I can't help but wonder if his turning Benji and Sybelle is a desperation grab to try and re-establish the order of things because he's genuinely terrified that Armand might actually try and off himself again. He's gotten a glimpse of what a world without him looks like and he's not doing well in it. And hey - back when he was thinking of ending it all, didn't Akasha trick him into making Pandora? Hasn't Pandora been his anchor? What if he gave Armand an anchor. No need to go into wither or not Armand wants it or actually needs it. And all the better if their turning reinforces his own new belief in nothing. After all, this was the man who once imagined that he stood apart and above humanity like some loving patrician figure, but now everything he's dedicated himself to is gone. And rather admit he's having a depressive episode, it's so much easier to put the world to blame and say he's rescuing them from it.

He needs Armand - and whatever that means - if it means need like a little dog in an emotional support vest kinda need or if its I'm ready to build a human connection and need you romantically/paternally kind of need - Marius is not ready to have that conversation. So, instead, he puts his emotions into reverse and floods the engine backward in an attempt to put things back into a pattern he can recognize.

This is where it gets so painful to watch because he's at a point where just admitting he needs help, that it feels good to have someone else to rely on, would be so good for him! He doesn't need to fear change, and people evolving around him is a good thing. But he can't see it like that. So now we have this mess, only it backfires because Armand still grabs the kids and leaves. Just because trapping himself in old patterns fits Marius doesn't mean that others' needs have to regress to shape to his own. Once again, it's Marius who knows best, Marius' selfishness, his complete lack of self-awareness, getting in his way.

My man is his own greatest enemy.

[crybabylipstick]

TALKING ABOUT THE ALLEGATIONS AGAINST MELANIE MARTINEZ:

In November of 2017, Timothy tweeted "what if I have my own story of a*use but I'm scared to ruin the persons life and I still love them in a f*cked up way and the public really loves them and most probably wouldn't believe me".

On December 4, 2017, Timothy publicly accused Melanie of s*xual as*ault on Twitter. She alleged two nights during which she "repeatedly said no" to advances from Melanie, claiming she kept secret for years and describing how Melanie had performed s*xual act*vities on her without her consent.

Melanie replied to the accusation shortly after claiming Timothy's allegation was false:

"I am horrified and saddened by the statements and story told tonight by Timothy Heller. What she and I shared was a close friendship for a period of time. We came into each other's lives as we were both starting our careers as artists, and tried to help each other. We both had pain in dealing with our individual d*mons and the new paths we were forging, but I truly felt we were trying to lift each other up. She never said no to what we chose to do together. And although we parted ways, I am sending her love and light always." (In case the picture is blurry).

- Melanie Martinez

In an interview with Newsweek, Timothy claimed that Melanie tried to contact both her and her boyfriend around 20 minutes after publishing the accusations through text and phone calls. No evidence to back this up was ever shared. In the aforementioned interview, Timothy went on to say that Melanie's dismissal of her account "says it all":

First of all, I did say 'no,' multiple times, but even if I hadn't, that doesn't mean I wanted it. She dug her own grave saying, 'she didn't say no'. That's not consent."

- Timothy Heller

On December 10, Melanie thanked her fans who supported her after the accusations.

"I understand how hard it could be to see my side of the story, considering no one with a heart would want to invalidate anyone speaking up about this topic. I want to thank my fans who took the time to research the timeline, analyze past Instagram photos, and question the story being told, which reveal her false statements. I trusted so many people in my life who took advantage of that trust for their own personal gain. Please know that my intentions with everything that I do in my life are always pure and I would never be i*timate with someone without their absolute consent." (In case the picture is blurry).

- Melanie Martinez

On July 19, 2024, 6 years after the controversy, Timothy posted a 6-minute video onto TikTok detailing how she had been h*rassed and bullied off the internet due to speaking up about the all*gations. She also said that she felt "quite validated" from Melanie's response due to Melanie admitting that the two had something take place between them.

(screenshot of the video Timothy is talking about Melanie and the whole situation).

Now, before anyone says something like "Oh wow you're supporting a 🍇pist" "You support 🍇pe" "Can't believe you believe Melanie" etc. I don't believe anyone, I'm not picking sides neither I'm trying to start a fight or offend anyone. I've been getting a lot of hate about the whole situation from people who don't even know me, saying stuff like "You support 🍇pe" "I hope you get 🍇ped too" "Supporting a 🍇pist" and really mean and offensive stuff like that. I DO NOT support 🍇pe. I just wanted to clear some things out, just because I'm a fan of Melanie doesn't mean I support everything she does and believe in everything she says etc. I'm just a fan and nothing more, I DO NOT care about her personal LIFE or what she DOES. I just listen to her music and art. I'm not trying to offend anyone or anything. And I'm not saying you shouldn't express your thoughts or opinions on the whole situation or anything like that. Neither I'm saying you are in the wrong if you believe Timothy/Melanie. All I'm trying to say is we shouldn't judge or pick sides because only Melanie and Timothy know what truly happened. We might never know the truth, and that's totally okay. The only people who can judge each other are Melanie and Timothy. We don't even know what happened. Timothy could be lying, Melanie could be lying, who knows? Also, Melanie hasn't been proven GUILTY neither is Timothy's story INVESTIGATED or proven to be TRUE.

Another thing I want to point out is that even tho Timothy claims to be traumatised by Melanie and the whole situation etc. Timothy in 2015/2016 had dressed up as Melanie:

( 1st photo edited by me (I mean how I compared the pictures) , please give credits if you use etc. Thank you 🌬️🤍).

I'm sure you don't dress up as someone who has done something so serious and mean to you.

Not to mention when Timothy said the date that apparently the whole situation happened Melanie was in another state on the "CRYBABY TOUR". The last time I checked, you couldn't f*ck someone from that far away. (Not trying to offend anyone). And she also has claimed that she didn't remember the date that well yet she is still giving us a date.

Anyways, that's all I have to say, if you read all that, thank you, I really appreciate it. 🌬️🤍

( By the way, this is MY opinion about the whole situation. NOT trying to start a fight, be mean or offend anyone. Saying this so that there won't be any misunderstandings or false information 💕🩹).

[hetalia-club]

Don’t know if you take requests like these but I’m really curious and I really love your interpretations of the characters but what kind personalities would certain nations be attracted to??? Feel free to disregard this, love you and your blog!

hmmm that's an interesting question let's see....(And thank you sm Ily to anon🥰!) (I would like to remind you all these are my opinions you don't have to agree)((I would also like to clarify this is for like a human AU))

Italy- I think Italy would like someone who was more pathetic than him. I do feel he would like being the 'strong one' in a relationship. He says all the time he doesn't like feeling useless or stupid so I think he would seek out an SO who looked to him as a knight in shining armor. I think he would get easily depressed in a relationship where he is constantly being 'mothered' by his SO. He might be fine with it at first but I think eventually it would really kill his self worth. I think his SO asking "Can you open this jar for me" "Can you look at the sink? I think it's broke" would be such a little victory for him. He would also want someone who appreciated him for him. Someone who thought his art was pretty and loved his cooking. He would really like praise from his SO and would need validation about their love for him almost daily and would always give it back as well.

Romano- I think Romano would essentially want to date himself. Not consciously but I think he would subconsciously seek out someone who was almost exactly like him for better or worse. Someone who didn't take much effort for him to understand. Someone with similar hobbies, outlooks and energy levels. He wouldn't like chasing someone and would like for it to come easy.

Germany- I think Germany would go for someone who was as ridged as him. He does not seem to care for nonsense. He doesn't like to leave his comfort zone so I think he would date wanting his comfort zone.

Japan- I head canon Japan as ace and not really caring much for relationships in the least. But if he were to be with someone I think he would want someone who was the opposite of him. Someone who was loud and energetic. I think he would feed off their energy and try and incorporate it into his own life.

Prussia- Prussia is another I view as hard core ace. As in he does not even think about relationships at all, he thinks they are icky. He has zero desire for physical contact and the idea of it kind of freaks him out. BUT if I had to decide what kind of person he would pick it would be someone who was crazy about him. Personality and looks wouldn't matter much to him they would just have to think he was perfect. he would feed on positive comments and praise from them and drink it up like a fine wine.

Austria- I think Austria would only date someone who had very specific interests. He cares deeply about certain things (Classical music being a big one) He would not call someone back after the first date if they said something like "I don't really like music". Austria wouldn't only be looking for a lover but also a best friend. someone he could talk to about his hobbies for hours, Someone who would sit and listen to him play his piano or violin and never complain. Someone he could bring to the opera or a symphony and they could gush about it the rest of the night and how great it was.

America- America would want to date someone who went with the flow. He is a very spontaneous person and he would want someone who could keep up with his ever changing mind and hobbies. Someone who would be happy to wake up at 5am and go on a hike and then half way through get an UBER home and finish out the day at Disney World. He would want to date someone who was also fine with lounging home some days and having streaks where they do nothing but watch movies. I think his SO would have to get used to being ghosted a lot. Not that he's doing it on purpose just that he maybe forgets to call.

England- England would want to be with someone who understood his dark humor. Someone who would laugh at his jokes and understand them without having to over explain it to them. I think his biggest turn on would be someone who could make him laugh really hard. Like an ugly laugh. Someone who he could sit and watch a movie with and they poke fun at it the entire time laughing and joking until the wee hours of the morning.

China- China would have very traditional views on relationships I feel. He would want someone who understood is culture. Someone who little work. He would want someone who as basically a mind reader. Someone who knew him better than he knew himself.

Russia- Russia would want someone who was loving and kind. Someone who looked at him with soft eyes and weren't put off by his threatening demeanor he puts out. I think his biggest turn on for a relationship would be someone who initiates all the affection. He wouldn't be the one to grab his SO and kiss them in a grocery store but if they did it to him it would make his day.

Canada- Now I think Canada would want someone who was a good listener. Someone who listened to what he had to say happily and could listen to him talk for hours. And he in turn would listen to them. Communication would be HUGE in a relationship with Canada. I think he could get easily dejected if he felt his SO were ignoring him or weren't listening to his feelings. Canada would be the type of guy do double and triple text just to make sure you saw it. If that would be a problem for you then he would be a bad partner to have because if you told him to stop he would completely shut down and stop texting you all together taking that as 'well they don't want me texting them ever I guess'

France- France would want someone who liked to wine and dine. He would want someone who wanted to go out every single weekend to a 5 star place. Someone who he could order for. Someone who put al their trust into him. he would want someone who he could really invest in. Someone he wanted to learn everything about. He would remain mysterious but would want to date someone who he knew like the back of his hand. So he could buy them a perfume he knew they would love. Take them to a wine tasting and say "try this one I know you'll love it"

Denmark- Den would want a best friend first and a lover second. He would want someone to go everywhere with him. Someone who was happy to drop everything and go to the store with him, just walk around the city, or go to a club. He would want someone who would be his world, his new obsession. He would be absolutely wild about his SO. He would buy them a ton of surprise gifts. They would wake up to a man at their door delivering flowers or him sowing up with a designer bag he got them. Denmark would want someone who was not afraid to ask "hey can you buy me this?" he would be the type of BF to ask "How many and what color :)?" He would want someone he could spoil rotten.

Norway- I think Norway would want an easy going person like himself. He will ignore his SO. He will make them wonder if they are even still dating and then then he will call his SO one night at 10pm and be like "Want to come over and watch a movie?" He would have to be with someone who was okay with that because he can't change it.

Sweden- Sweden needs someone teh complete opposite of him. Someone who will do all the talking at a party for him. Someone who will know when he wants to leave somewhere without him asking, someone who knows what he likes to eat and where he wants to go out. His SO would be running circles around him while he just stood there and he wouldn't have it any other way.

Iceland- I view Iceland as ace as well but if he were in a relationship I think he would want someone who was like him. Someone who was moody and sassy. It would irritate him to no end and he may instigate a lot of arguments about it but at the same time he would like that. he would like someone who wasn't afraid to push his buttons and someone who he could push their buttons and they would just forget about it in a few hours and not hold it against him. Iceland would want to have a heated argument about "Don't put the keys there put them here" and he wouldn't let it go until you agreed with him and then a couple hours later he would be like "So we getting Dominoes or..."

Finland- Finland would want someone who made his personality look dark and brooding. Someone who was the light of his life. Someone who was cheerful and kind. But also someone who enjoyed the same music and shared in his heavy metal obsession. It wouldn't be a deal breaker if they didn't like it. But the entire relationship he will be showing them bands saying "What do you think about these guys?" and if he did so happen to find a metal band his SO liked he would go over board buying them shirts, concert tickets, albums and just really nurture it.

kind of came up with these on the spot but it was fun to sit there and think about them for a minute! I love picking apart personalities

[ronanceautistic]

helloo fellow ronancer!! first of all i love your hoh nancy hc's, they're both delightful and heart wrenching :-)

if it's not too much to ask do you have any angsty robin hc's? esp after all the vecna stuff, how do you think she'd cope with it? it's so upsetting to think about how she used to be some rando and then as soon as she steps foot into the upside down she almost died. i need to hear your thoughts pal!!!!

Thank you!

Robin angst! Something I wish I talked about more.

I think Robin sort of takes comfort in like the “shoulder to cry on” role, as it is easier than dealing with her own feelings. Did Nancy have a nightmare? Robin will stay over! Is Steve struggling with his wounds? Robin is here to help! She is very very good at making it look like she has it all together, by spending as much time focusing on other people and in a way processing her trauma through them. But I think when she is alone she doesn’t know what to do with herself.

I think that’s a hard thing for her especially, because I think she is introverted, she needs time to decompress after socialising but at the same time isn’t great at being alone. She needs other people around to take her mind off of stuff in a way.

One of the ways Nancy and Robin completely clash is Nancy is very focused on the task at hand and will do everything to forget her trauma, and fixate on something meaningless (that means everything to her), but Robin wants to talk about what happened but doesn’t know how to ask for herself. If she said to Nancy “hey, I’m really struggling I need to talk about this” Nancy would absolutely listen to her, but she just can’t seem to open up in that way and it comes out as “hey, you’re struggling, can we talk about it?”, and Nancy absolutely pushes back against that.

I also think Robin has had a kind of inferiority complex her entire life and it only worsens hearing all the horror stories of what Nancy, and El, and Will have been through. Robin went through something incredibly traumatic but in her head she can’t help but turn it into to a competition and think “well they have been through worse and they wouldn’t be reacting in this way”. It’s hard for her to admit that people have different reactions, and maybe something that doesn’t bother Nancy is a trigger for herself. I think because of being gay and probably autistic she’s had that sort of “why am I not being normal about this when everyone else is” mentality her entire life.

I think a big moment for her is opening up for the first time (to someone other than Steve) about what happened in the bunker. She spills out every detail to Nancy (who in Robins head has been through so much worse), but Nancys reaction is like “oh my god, that’s horrific, I can’t imagine going through that”, and finally in Robins mind it clicks that yeah, it was horrific. She is absolutely right to not be okay. I think she definitely would break down maybe for the first time since it happened when someone else is giving her the validation her mind wants but can never seem to ask for upfront.

[p1xiemeat]

last post in addition the one i just posted

one of the worst things that has been said about me in the last few days is the fact that i'm just pretending i'm autistic to use as an excuse.

this actually made me sick to read. ive had so many hurtful things being said about me, but this is probably one of the worst.

1.) i am autistic. i have a formal diagnosis. my son is also autistic and so is my sister. i receive disability for it. and it took me a long time to actually get a diagnosis due to my state having resources mainly for children.

2.) i would never in a million years use being on the spectrum as an excuse for anything. and i haven't. im still learning about autism in general and about myself since discovering im autistic, so this is a complete lie.

3.) ive never "changed" my mental illness. i was misdiagnosed in the past. i have stayed at multiple mental hospitals, 2 of which gave me different diagnosis. and 2 of those hospitals were also medically abusing and even physically abusing patients, me included. ive had horrific experiences at these places. they also didnt listen to me when i was telling them how i felt or what i was thinking. being a drug addict, some doctors unfortunately judge people like me and think we are just med seeking a lot of the time. med seeking is faking a condition, injury, etc. to receive medication so they can abuse it.

4.) its a very common issue for autistic people to be misdiagnosed before they discover they are on the spectrum. autistic traits can sometimes overlap other mental illnesses such as bipolar disorder or bpd. in my case i have bipolar disorder AND autism. and sadly autism is hard to diagnose because autism presents differently for different people. and women are more likely to be misdiagnosed than men.

5.) autism is not a mental illness. it is a neurological and developmental disorder. and if you are not a doctor you have no right to judge someone. especially if you don't even know anything about autism, which im going to assume this person doesn't because they thought it was a mental illness. disabled people are constantly met with ignorance and ppl that don't take their disability seriously. so many ppl are treated like their disability isn't valid.

to the person who wrote this:

u don't know me. u haven't ever been around me. and most of the other things you have posted about me are not true, taken out of context or just a straight up lie. i don't have to prove anything to you or anybody else. at the end of the day i am still gonna be autistic. i know who i am and what the truth is. i just wanted to make this last post because it hurts to have shit like this said about me when i spent years going through hell because i didnt know i had autism, only to go through even more hell trying to get tested for it because its not an easy process to get a diagnosis. and it bothers me to see this posted about ANYBODY. i never asked to be disabled. i never asked to be treated differently. in fact, i hate that certain people treat me differently since learning i have autism. some of my own family members have said ignorant things about me and interact with me in uncomfortable ways and it hurts. ive been bullied for traits that i didn't know were autism. and for my entire life ive always felt like there was something wrong with me because i couldnt make friends because ppl always thought i was weird or annoying. i've always felt like an alien around other ppl. i dont want pity or sympathy, nor do i think i should receive it. autism isnt a flaw. nobody should feel bad for being on the spectrum. and i really dont appreciate you insinuating that i want others to feel bad for me because im autistic.

getting diagnosed with autism was probably one of the best things to ever happen to me! because now i know more about myself and i can live my life better knowing why i behave certain ways. i am able to receive the right help and seek support from ppl who can actually provide it for me when i need it. i am not ashamed to be autistic. the only thing i get upset about regarding my autism is when people like you try to judge me without even knowing anything about me or my life.

instead of dedicating your time to judging me and analyzing everything i do or say online, try to educate yourself on what it is you're talking about and worry about yourself.

im not going to change who i am. and i can't change certain things about myself. but what i can do is choose how i react to it and live my life doing what makes me happy.

i didnt need to explain myself. but im not going to let people call me a liar for being myself. its unfair to me and everyone else who has to experience this.

xo

[danganronpa-headcanons-imagines]

Hey this is literally my fist time sending a request ever. But can I get a kokichi who has a crush on a very flirty girl. In fact her ultimate is the ultimate flirt. But she gets even more flirty around kokichi because she likes him too. And kokichi i would think is kinda hard to fluster but at some point she finally does and shes so happy. Thanks. Sorry if this is just nonsense.

Yo, glad to be the first person you send a request to! And don't apologize, it's not nonsense. To be honest I prefer a longer prompt, as it helps lead me! ----------

Kokichi vs The Ultimate Flirt

The Ultimate Flirt, huh? Kokichi wasn't impressed, that's not even a valid talent either! So when he heard of your talent he just kinda shrugged his shoulders

The moment you entered the room, that changed. You were just gorgeous. And your voice? Something about it drew him in like a fishing lure. So the moment you approached him he was ready

Pretty much every person you talked to would eventually get flustered and clam up. Which after so long, has gotten frustrating. No one ever could just TALK to you anymore. Despite people praising the ground you stood on, you felt alone

But with Kokichi... he had bite. He wasn't falling at your feet or losing brain function, he actually had a discussion with you! You had someone you could genuinely talk to!

Actually getting to talk to you made Kokichi realise why you were so well liked. You were really funny and pleasent

After meeting you made an effort to talk to him as much as possible, both to your and his delight

Yeah, both of your crushes on each other only got worse as time went on. You were attracted to his headstrong attitude, and he was attracted to your wit and confidence

It didn't really process in your head, but you were eventually getting more and more flirty with Kokichi in an attempt to make him a blushing mess

But that is NOT easy. He was used to manipulation tactics, which are still evident in flirting techniques. Sure your words were nice, but they couldn't make him break

Everytime you used a line on him, he was able to push back without faltering

It soon became a little game of yours! You'd try to flirt, he'd flirt back, it was fun for you two and made you smile

But being the Ultimate Flirt isn't all sunshine and rainbows. A lot of people take advantage of you, or just do anything to please you. It wore you down over the years

But there was one day that just broke you. Long story short, you learned that half of your friends only wanted to fuck you. They didn't give a shit about a genuine friendship and were using you, which broke your heart. Kokichi found you crying on a park bench, and somehow felt himself feeling genuine empathy

He talked to you for over an hour, just listening to your issues and trying to cheer you up by offering to make their lives hell, making you laugh

Eventually you started to feel so much better. You could just feel that he actually cared, in his own special way

As you felt the last bit of sorrow exit your body, you sighed and looked deep into his eyes

"You know, being around you makes me feel better than ever. I know you said you have a hard time with relationships, but I feel lucky to have you. You should be thanked more often, so... thank you. Thank you Kokichi, for lighting up my life"

Neither of you ever expected it to happen, but suddenly his face turned bright red, jaw hanging open. His eyes were wide, darting around nervously, and he struggled to speak. It was like seeing a Unicorn, no one had ever seen it before, but you got lucky. The sight of his facade crumbling away was adorable

A laugh slipped off your lips and you couldn't stop yourself. After soooo long, so many attempts to crack him, you finally did it! And you didn't even mean to this time!

Kokichi pouted at your laughter, but his heated cheeks sold him out

After that day, you still flirted with him. But everytime he brushed it off, you loved to bring up that one night

When you officially started dating and told everyone, literally no one was surprised. Pretty much everyone thought you were already dating

----------

{Like my work? Consider tipping me on Ko-fi! Every little bit counts~}

[dreamwatch]

Spotify Wrapped Writing Prompt

Look, I was pretty sure someone asked for this, but I can't find the ask and I've written it and I think I'm a little bit in love with it, so sharing anyway.

-----

#66 - Hard To Handle by The Black Crowes

Eddie hates waiting in line. Life is too short (a lesson he learned the hard way) for standing around waiting for things. With the exception of getting gig tickets or getting into those gigs. Both valid reasons to wait.

Maybe less so this gig.

It’s not really his scene, there’s more than a few poseurs in the line, but Kyle likes the band and, as so often is the case with them, Kyle gets what Kyle wants.

Eddie gets… a little less.

He’s at the stage in his life, at the grand old age of twenty four, where he craves companionship over sex. While his friends are still fucking around, literally in some case, Eddie needs to settle. Needs the peace and stability. And he’d never, ever, admit it to anyone, but he needs to be taken care of. The thing is, thats a hard sell in your early twenties. But Kyle got it. Got him. His need to be looked after. The fact that he had scars and trauma and health issues from ‘an accident’. He was okay with all that.

For a while, anyway. Things change though, right?

Eddie earns shitty money, so Kyle pays more of the rent, and he gets the sense more and more that one wrong move, one missed pay check, or fuck, if he lost his job, Kyle would throw him out on the street. What’s love got to do with it? as Tina would say. So he finds himself toeing the line more and more. Doesn’t argue about the stupid shit, let’s Kyle have his way more and more. Just little things.

Little things mount up to be big things, though.

So yeah, he comes to gigs he’s not really into and he sees bands he might not have bothered to, and he listens to music thats okay, but it’s not him, you know? Its like, him adjacent. 

And all of that is why he’s standing outside the Ritz Music Hall in Indianapolis, freezing his balls off, waiting to get in to see The Black Crowes.

Kyle got to talking to some people in the line, and Eddie just smiles and makes out like, yeah my god, great band, like he wouldn’t have been arguing a few years back about how Iron Maiden were clearly the superior artists. He doesn’t have the fight in him for those kind of arguments anymore. So he nods and smiled, hands shoved in the pockets of his shitty old leather jacket, scarf pulled tight around his face. Tight around that scar.

He zones out and he’s looking around, people watching, killing time. Eyes up and down the line as he keeps moving to keep warm. And he spots it, about thirty people ahead of him, that swoop of brown hair that he knows oh so well. 

No fucking way.

He tells Kyle he thinks he’s spotted a friend, won’t be a second, and all that, and then heads down the sidewalk.

“Steve?”

Chestnut Swoop spins to look at him, and he didn’t even need him to, he knew who it was. Knows that hair anywhere. Those shoulders, the way he carries himself, the way he moves. Eddie knows it all.

“Eddie? Holy shit!”

Eddie nearly gets knocked off his feet, Steve lunging toward him and practically pulling him off the ground into a bear hug. He’s kind of lost for a second, before he wraps his own arms around Steve and squeezes back. He smells good, and Eddie recognises his cologne. Eternity for Men. He picked it out for Kyle, and Kyle just scrunched his nose up and walked off. Steve’s wearing it. Something Eddie would have chosen.

Steve pulls back from him but hangs on to his arms, like he’s taking him all in. Eddie’s heart is thundering in his chest.

“What the fuck are you doing here? Actually, scratch that, where the fuck have you been?”

“Here, in Indy… mostly. It’s a long story.” Steve raises an eyebrow but Eddie plows on, doesn’t give him a chance for a follow up question. “What about you man, here to see... “ he points to the marquee up above. 

“Yeah,” answers Steve. “Yeah, there’s a few of us from work and, fuck! Robins here! She’s gone to pee,” Steve looks around, as if Robins pissing in the street, “uh, somewhere. Man she’s gonna lose her shit when she sees you.”

They talk, and Steve introduces his work friends and Eddie can’t help himself, he’s checking them out trying to work out which one is Steve’s girlfriend. Robin screeches “Eddie!” as she runs up the street, practically throws her self at him. He gets the overwhelming urge to cry. He’s feels like an idiot. 

“Eddie? Come on man, we’ll lose our place.”

Kyle comes up behind him, looking mildly pissed. He’s eyeing up Steve’s friends and then his eyes are all over Steve. There’s no way he doesn’t recognise him. Eddie has a photo album that he started putting together in 1986. Pictures of the kids, of Wayne, of Robin and Nancy and Steve. There’s one of the four of them sitting on the porch of Wayne’s new trailer, beers in hand, all cheering at the camera as Wayne took the photograph. Eddie and Steve practically in each others lap. That one is in a frame. Kyle clocked something there straight away. Eddie gave him nothing. Close friend, he said. Kyle huffed, sure. Subject closed.

It was the weirdest thing. And it wasn’t just trauma bonding, or whatever the fuck Robin called it. The trauma got them together, maybe, threw them altogether on a big spin cycle and spat them out, but Eddie and Steve clicked. They’d have clicked without it. So easy to say opposites attract, but they weren’t that different really. Not when you scratched the surface. 

And it wasn’t really anything but it wasn’t really nothing, either. There were late nights under blankets, and well you’re staying over and it’s cold so you may as well climb in the bed, dude, and I can’t sleep wanna go for a drive? and arms thrown around shoulders, and sitting side by side, knees touching. There were pinkies linked, hands over hands, lying in bed crying, foreheads touching. Nothing, but everything.

They had two good summers before Steve said he was moving away. Nothing for him in Hawkins, apparently. Eddie couldn’t hide the hurt, so he ended up burying it in the back of his van with his backpack and his guitar and left town first. Said goodbye to Wayne and just took off. He came back for holidays and birthdays, but if Steve or Robin did the same, Eddie never knew.

And now they’re outside the Ritzy Music Hall in Indianapolis and it’s November and its cold and Kyle is standing there like he wants to start swinging his dick. And Eddie? He just wants to grab Steve by the hand and run. But he doesn’t. He doesn’t run now. He follows.

“Um, I should get back,” he says.

Steve’s brows dip, like he’s confused. “Fuck no! Cut in with us. I’m not letting you out of my sight, dickhead.” Steve laughs but it’s stiff and his eyes don’t really leave Kyle. 

“We’re good, thanks.” Kyle throws his arm over Eddies shoulder, pisses on his territory for all to see and starts to drag him away, but Eddie pulls out from under him.

“Just a second,” says Eddie. Kyle cuts him a look, sharp and beady. Eddie reaches into his pocket, finds a scrap of paper. No pen. Shit.

“Ooh, yes, pen! I have one!” says Robin, and he loves her, and fuck he’s missed her so much. And her hair is different, and she looks so cool. It’s only been three years and he’s missed it all.

He jots his number down and hands the paper over, before snatching it back and adding another.

“Top is mine, or Kyles, I guess,” and he’s so embarrassed at that, “but the bottom one is Waynes. He’d love to hear from you.”

And so its goodbye, and call soon, and he’s back in line with Kyle and Kyle is in a shitty mood now. Declares how he just wanted to enjoy his night, and well apparently Eddie running into the best friends he ever had, the ones he ran away from so they couldn’t hurt him first, well that just fucked Kyle’s night right up. 

They’re in, eventually, and the band come on, and now Eddie at least has noise to drown out the thoughts ticking over in his head. He feels suddenly so empty, so cold. He has work in the morning, and he’s starting early and he could feign any number of ailments at this stage, but there’s this terrible little thought at the back of his mind that he could end up with all his shit thrown out in the street. 

The band play a slow song, one he knows is called Miserable and deep inside he’s laughing at himself. Kyle is swaying away, one step away from getting his lighter out by the look of him, so Eddie taps him on the shoulder and tells him he’s going for a piss.

There’s another line at the bathroom, everyone else jumping out during the slow song, but eventually he’s at the front, gets in an out in less than a minute. He doesn’t want to go back inside. He keeps looking around, hoping he’ll see the swoop, or Robin’s pink streak in her blonde hair, but the place is packed and it’s like looking for a needle in a haystack. He fucks off to the bar instead. Another line. Why not?

The song changes, and he knows this one, intimately. It’s an Otis Redding number. He has a really intense memory of his dad singing it for his mom. His dad fucking loved Otis Redding. It punches something inside him and he feels breathless. He gets to the front, orders his Jack and coke, he’s in a go big or go home kind of mood now, and its not until he opens his mouth to order that he tastes blood. He raises his hand and touches his lip. He was chewing it and he didn’t even notice it. 

His mind’s in a fucking pit now, and there’s this song and he just wants to go home, but it’s not even his. Nothing is his. 

There’s a hand tapping on his shoulder and like, a fucking fight is the last thing he wants and the best thing that could happen to him tonight. He turns and gets a face full of Steve Harrington.

“Hey, you okay?” How does he do that? How does he just stay so reasonable, so considerate? Eddie ran away and they see each other for the first time in years and he could be pissed and angry but instead he just makes Eddie want to climb inside him.

“No,” Eddie says, honest for once. And then Steve’s hand is in his and he’s being dragged from the building, and they’re out on the street, and fucking Kyle, he’s going to—

“Hey, Ed, dude look at me.”

“Kyle—”

“Fuck Kyle.”

“What?”

They’re back on the sidewalk, with the smokers and the early leavers, and it’s fucking cold so he can’t hide the shiver. 

Steve rubs his hands up and down the sides of Eddie’s arms, because he remember. The way the cold seeps into Eddie’s bones and never leaves once it’s there. He remembers.

“I said fuck Kyle.”

“I have to…”

“You don’t have to do anything. You look fucking miserable, and I don’t like the way he talks to you. I don’t like the way you shrink when he stands next to you. You used to shine. He doesn’t make you shine.”

And what is he supposed to say to that?

“I’d make you shine.” Steve says that. Steve Harrington says that to Eddie Munson. Eddie stops breathing.

“I…”

“I’ve missed you, Eddie. So fucking much.” Steve looks right at him, eyes bright and wet. 

Eddie can barely answer, his throat tight. He sniffs, just nods like a fool in the middle of the street. “I’ve missed you, too.”

“Let’s go somewhere. Get some food or something.”

“Robin—”

“Robins fine, she’s with her girlfriend.”

And he just nods again, like a dashboard ornament. “Kyle—”

“Do you love him?”

“What?’

Steve laughs. “I said. Do. You. Love. Him?”

Does he?

He loves having someone at home when he is because he hates being alone. He loves having someone lie next to him in bed so that when he wakes up the world feels real. He loves having someone to cook for, someone to go grocery shopping with. Someone to hold when they’re having a bad day, someone to hold him when his world is falling apart. Someone to show his favourite films to, to play his favourite albums to, to share books with. To laugh with. Someone to sit in the drive in and hold hands with. He loves that.

But he doesn’t love Kyle. And Kyle doesn’t love him.

“You always know, don’t you?”

Steve smiles at him, that cocky little smirk of his. Gorgeous.

“I always know.”

Steve takes his hand and they walk together.

Side by side.

[zorkaya-moved]

me @ tumblr rpc: YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO PLOT WITH OCs and it shows.

And you know what? That happens. Plotting is hard. Honestly? Hate plotting so much if I don't know a person these days because I just feel overly anxious and ramble. So yeah, anyhow... Let me share some personal thoughts! THIS DOES NOT TOUCH ON PEOPLE WHO TAKE THEIR TIME, PLEASE TAKE YOUR TIME IN PLOTTING AND PLEASE DO EVERYTHING ON YOUR OWN PACE! THIS IS A HOBBY AND THIS IS SOMETHING WE DO FOR FUN! This is based solely on some of my own experiences with SOME plotting (not all ofc!) as a woman oc writer in 2022-2023. I've had fantabulous experience with plotting and not so much. Please know you're valid, Ily, thank you for bearing with my burnt out ass in plottings. Mwah. Stay winning.

We all suffer from the collective dead brain cell syndrome when it comes to plotting any interaction, but do you know what kind of sucks and makes little ol' me tinsy bit bitter at the end of 2023 after going through countless people who just ignored my plotting proposals when I gave a ton of ideas? And what I'm going to call out just a tiny bit as a woman oc writer?

You can get into wikipedia and seek out information about a canon character to figure out some ideas on plots if you don't know the fandom, but do you do the same for OCs? 'Cuz OCs are sure as hell the very same 'canons from fandoms I don't know' type of situation.

Do you reach out to the CREATOR who can answer all your questions no matter how miniscule they can be? We, OC writers, are ready to give you the deep lore if you ask.

Do you check out about pages or headcanon pages? Hell, some of us have DETAILED NAVIGATION PAGES FOR VERSES! Is your OC or Canon from there? Check it out! Read! Find what interests YOU or if you didn't find something? Just ask the WRITER! Simple, innit? God, Imma be real, some of y'all gonna get my DMs like 'Listen, I can't find if you have this hc, could you please link it to me?' because I want info for plot ideas and if you do the same to me? I kiss u platonically.

Lemme give you a Done For You plotting thoughts you can use on how to plot with OCs, ladies and gents and nonbinary folks!

Do you have a specific dynamic you WANT for your character? Perhaps, you see a villain OC and want smth toxic to try out - ASK. Or you see an OC that might be a fun friend or neighbor or any other more positive dynamic - ASK. Inquire each other about what DYNAMICS you're open to. Oh you open to all? Sick. PUT DOWN YOUR BOUNDARIES FIRST. BOTH SIDES. SPEAK YOUR BOUNDARIES.

Do you have verses both of your characters are in? Be it OC & OC or Canon & OC? Noice, discuss all possible connections your characters might have! Offer ideas! Offer thoughts! The worst thing another can say is 'no'. And if so? COUNTLESS POSSIBILITIES. Yummy possibilities. Friends, childhood friends, childhood rivals, exes, rivals, co-workers, fight on sight, live next to each other, see each other in the same fucking cafe your muse goes at 2 pm specifically and ALWAYS sees another muse there... Countless. I'm telling you.

JUST DO THE FIRST STEP TOO WHEN YOU INTERACT WITH OCS, I'M ON MY KNEES BEGGING.

OFFER. IDEAS. The vaguest ones will do ok too. I cannot stress this enough but as an OC writer, I've had instances where I just... Gave 5 ideas only to have someone just drop me. Fully and completely. Not the 'I'll reach out to you later I need to think about this' but just full on 'wow this is too much plotting and I don't want to invest that much time' like it sucks. It sucks being the only person offering possible dynamics, ideas, even funny ones in some cases! I'm so burnt out from plotting dynamics because I keep. Offering. Ideas. But I don't have the same feedback loop. More like I have 0 feedback in the instances I dive into possibilities which burnt me out from plotting altogether, closing plotting possibilities with those who may actually be the same kind of insane as I am. And it sucks. Bless you all who give vague ideas or not vague ideas. Love you. You're fucking champions.

BE OPEN TO ASKING QUESTIONS, PLEASE ASK QUESTIONS, HOLY SHIT, PLEASE. Please never forget to ask "Hey, how would you feel about this scenario?" or "Would your character be in this kind of situation? Maybe that's how they met and started hanging out?" or "Oh, how about us trying out this type of dynamic and see where it goes?" or anything, really.

Anyways, this is just my 2 am psa because yeah why not. December sucks ass so why not speak out my thoughts at the end of 2023 to enter 2024 with sunglasses and cool Women OCs Propaganda I will continue preaching. You're all welcome to reblog this.

[sylvies-kablooie]

tbh, i think the whole thought process behind how sylvie is written is that she is not attached to loki and her happiness doesn't at all depend on him in any way.

was their connection deep? did he impact her? "shatter" her world even? yes. this is why she is so angry at him. bc in her mind, he had betrayed her.

but he doesn't take up much more space in her mind. she goes on to live her life just fine without him at the end of both seasons.

loki is a different story, he is obsessed with her to the point of doing something completely "out of character" and being ready to sacrifice everything for her.

i personally love how "unequal" their relationship is in this way, but i understand that it's not the majority of shippers' cup of tea kind of dynamic.

this is an interesting interpretation! i enjoy getting to hear people's differing takes on their dynamic, so this was a fun read. and hey if unrequited is your trope then all the more power to you. you're braver than me, that's for sure.

i haven't rewatched s2 (and tbh idk if i ever will- it just didn't do it for me the way i wanted it to) but the consensus that "loki fell first and harder" def seems supported by s1 and enhanced by s2. which i think made it all the more shocking when she kisses him first. i love that little detail.

i have a different take, which is informed by episode 5- particularly the bar scene contrasted with the record shop scene. she tells him to go and live his life and move on, then immediately goes to a record shop, tells the man at the counter she had a bad day, and then cries to the velvet underground (it looked like crying, also possible she was just laying there and basking it all in, which is just as compelling in my opinion).

to me that read as someone who is trying so hard to place their feelings in a convenient little box and ignore them and then running away when it doesn't work.

sylvie doesn't strike me as someone who can sit still, especially not after living through a million apocalypses and trying to ensure her survival. and while getting a job in oklahoma might not be the same frantic pace she's used to, i do think she threw herself into it (employee of the month placard i'm looking at you!) so she has a new life, a new job, time to do things like go to the bar and get a haircut and listen to music and do everything possible to just. not. process. the annoying feelings that the citadel situation brings up. just keep moving! just don't think about it! and so when loki rolls up at her work, she tries to push him away, tell him he's the last thing she wants to deal with, get him to leave. the tone in the bar scene felt like that to me as well. like she's saying just leave me so i can stop thinking about this.

of course, loki does not want to leave her- it's just that for some reason he is physically incapable of talking about anything but the TVA, who ruined her life and she justifiably wants nothing to do with hearing about how great they actually are. he is pretty skilled at killing the mood. (i take great pleasure in rewrite fics that make a show of addressing this)

am i blinded by shipping goggles and my own projection onto her? it's possible! but to me it read as someone in denial. when we hear sylvie talk about her love life on the train in s1 (a scene i LOVE because it seems so out of left field for her) we get a very clear sense she has no idea what she is doing when it comes to romance (and then flat out says so during the blanket scene). her experience with romance hasn't been anything real, to the point where i hesitate to even use the term "romance"- just centuries of numbing herself by staying busy with a fling. she is like a shark that will just collapse if she stops moving. which we get to see her do in the record store!

that's just how i read it though! your read on it is just as valid and i like hearing all of the different takes. i am by no means trying to persuade you to join my pining sylvie agenda, just using this blog as a means of idea exchange. which i love doing. seriously it's so fun.