#literally pretends this time

[chenziee]

Krampus!Law AU

Young krampus Law coming to take Luffy to hell for being bad and instead ends up being non-consensually assimilated into Luffy's found family and he doesn't have enough energy as a person to fight it. (He's also too week to that smile but no one has to know that.) It goes downhill from there and they eventually get married and adopt twp cats and a little cerberus puppy (is not very little after a few months). Law only bothers to actually take Luffy to hell when Luffy's at the end of his lifespan so they can keep being happily married (in hell)

Law's grandpa Is Not Pleased™ but when did Law ever care what Sengoku has to say? He'll come around eventually anyway, he's too soft (Cora's words)

Cora is very supportive and he comes visit every sunday with meat freshly roasted over hell's fire (made by Baby 5 and Baarbara the hell-goat because Cora might be a krampus and he might live in hell but he is also NOT allowed anywhere near a fire)

Ace thinks Luffy dating a krampus is fucking hilarious. Sabo likes to threaten Law any chance he can get just for the hell of it but he actually kind of likes him

Garp also thinks it's fucking hilarious but he also threatens Law every time he sees him (and he means it)

Dadan is the one who accidentally called Law to take Luffy after the shitty little brat broke one too many of her favourite mugs, glasses, plates, chairs, and dining tables. She's not even surprised that, not only is Luffy still running around breaking things, but he's now also dragging this poor, poor tired krampus along. She apologises to Law for the first time 2 minutes after Law first steps into their house

(Law just sighs and glances at Luffy, who grins and waves at him excitedly, and Law then can do nothing but shrug and mumble something about "his life getting ruined and for what? A smile so bright it blinds him? How disgusting.")

(Dadan is not entirely sure how she feels about Law's disturbingly relaxed tone but she also isn't getting paid enough to deal with That™)

(That™ being a painfully obvious crush)

The Straw Hats are not even surprised when Luffy introduces his new krampus friend to them and they all just look at him, look at Luffy, look at each other, shrug, and that's it

It only occurs to them a week later that Law is from hell and can therefore share info on unexplored lands, powerful demons, exotic kitchen, unknown plants, funny bugs (a question that was not well received by some), different medicine technics, ancient, undiscovered relics, and--oh god do these questions ever stop?!

Bepo, Penguin and Shachi freak out for a moment but then they notice how happy Law looks talking about how much Luffy drives him crazy and that's about enough for them

(Shachi and Penguin like to whine and complain about how Law should take his stupid pining elsewhere, some of us are lonely, you ass)

(They also like to actively and loudly plan the wedding years before it even becomes an option for Law and Luffy. They do it to tease and bother Law but also because once it comes down to it, they WILL be ready)

Doffy is that one aunt who drops by once a year unannounced, tries to get all the dirt on everyone and everything, shares the dirt on everyone and everything (without being asked), and then fucks off and is never heard of again until the next time he decides it's time to bother his favourite nephew and his cute little boyfriend again just because he thinks Law's reactions are funny

(Law has to recover for a week after each and every one of Doffy's visits)

[chloesimaginationthings]

Gregory has it best out of the new FNAF protagonists..

[inkskinned]

love when men cry about body hair bc "it's hygiene" and yet 15% of cis men leave the bathroom without washing their hands at all and an additional 35% only just wet their hands without using soap. that is nearly half of all men. that means statistically you have probably shaken hands with or been in direct contact with one of these people.

love when men say that women "only want money" when it turns out that even in equal-earning homes, women are actually adding caregiver burdens and housework from previous years, whereas men have been expanding leisure time and hobbies. in equal-earning households, men spend an average of 3.5 hours extra in leisure time per week, which is 182 hours per year - a little over a week of paid vacation time that the other partner does not receive. kinda sounds like he wants her money.

love that men have decided women are frail and weak and annoying when we scream in surprise but it turns out it's actually women who are more reliable in an emergency because men need to be convinced to actually take action and respond to the threat. like, actually, for-real: men experience such a strong sense of pride about their pre-supposed abilities that it gets them and their families killed. they are so used to dismissing women that it literally kills them.

love it. told my father this and he said there's lies, damned lies, and statistics. a year ago i tried to get him to evacuate the house during a flash flood. he ignored me and got injured. he has told me, laughing, that he never washes his hands. he has said in the last week that women are just happier when we're cooking or cleaning.

maybe i'm overly nostalgic. but it didn't used to feel so fucking bleak. it used to feel like at least a little shameful to consider women to be sheep. it just feels like the earth is round and we are still having conversations about it being flat - except these conversations are about the most obvious forms of patriarchy. like, we know about this stuff. we've known since well before the 50's.

recently andrew tate tried to justify cheating on his partner as being the "male prerogative." i don't know what the prerogative for the rest of us would be. just sitting at home, watching the slow erosion of our humanity.

[kiisaes]

big day for annoying people (me)

[ew-selfish-art]

DpxDc AU: Tim as a child was never given a lot of information regarding the scribbling messy handwriting that appeared over night all over his arms- naturally he came to his own conclusions.

Tim Drake was home entirely alone at 9 years old and was about to go out for the night to test his brand new long exposure camera lens when he sees the writing on his arm. It’s not English, like he assumed it was at first, but it was using the alphabet to represent… Tim isn’t bad at math but this formula is complex for his little genius brain.

Looking at his camera, he decides he can spare a moment to look it up, solve it, and get back out into old town Gotham in time for Batman and Robin’s final patrol lap. He does just that, finding the problem to relate to some aerospace engineering and then quickly deduces what laws and theorems need to be applied. He finds a pen, writes down his findings in much neater handwriting onto his arm, and goes out. It’s barely a remarkable night at all. He gets a much more memorable photo of Robin roundhouse kicking a hench person.

Things just continued on that way. Tim would find some complex math, physics or chemistry prompt on his arm (surrounded by various question marks or notes or sad faces)- he’d answer it as best he could and move on with his life. Perhaps his parents were manifesting these pop quizzes? Perhaps his subconscious felt guilty about abandoning his studies for more Bat related pursuits? Tim really didn’t care to think much about it once he became Robin- there was too much on his plate and too many peoples problems for him to fix.

Notably, however, after the attack at the Tower, the pop quiz appeared and Tim wrote back that he wouldn’t be able to find an answer to this one. It was the only time Tim questioned the markings appearance and it was because the next thing that appeared was “Hope you feel better soon.”

… his parents wouldn’t include that on a pop quiz. Cursed then. Tim decided it must be a curse, whatever, he’d deal with the implications later in life.

Tim then has the worst year of his life, hes 15, no longer Robin and the questions from his curse are getting less math oriented and more… philosophical. A lot of mentions of death that, in hindsight helped him actually grieve, and a lot of theories about dark matter and souls. Tim answers back as best he can but he’s drained and his answers aren’t very good in his opinion. He gets minimal feedback.

It all comes to a point that he’s at a family dinner, Bruce is at the head of the table, Jason has promised just to stay for dessert, Damian hasn’t thrown a single insult his way and Steph was laughing at him- when a new theoretical model appears on his arm.

“You’re just as bad as Bruce, Timberly. Hiding a soulmate from all of us, how fucking typical.” Jason points out, while watching Tim scribble back some math with a question mark onto his arm.

“A what? No, this is just a curse. I get pop quizzes every now and then.” Tim bats away Steph who rapidly approaches and began to analyze his arm (the rest of the family isn’t far behind).

“Drake. Explain how you came to this conclusion.” Damian seems more curious than anything, if his lack of insults was anything to go off of.

“Since I was young I’ve had at least weekly math check ins, I never had a parent or anyone else around so I assumed my parents had me cursed to ensure I stayed on top of my studies. Sometimes it’s physics or chemistry, for a while there it was a ton of philosophy and behavioral psychology.” He shrugs his shoulders.

“Master Tim, I believe the lack of adults in your life has led you towards a false conclusion. That is most certainly a soulmate mark. The individual to whom you are responding is undoubtedly your other half.” Alfred attempts to calm the room before explaining to Tim. Tim isnt sure if he believes the butler, though Alfred only very rarely lied, so he grabs the pen once more. He writes his first question back: “Who am I to you?”

The room waits in anticipation and within moments a brand new line appears on Tim’s arm and he is vindicated: “We do math together???”

——

The reason Danny is failing English is because his built in homework helper sucks ass at metaphors and has apparently never read any classic literature. The tutor on his arm is great at puzzles and math tho.

Danny gets a reply back one night that he wasn’t expecting (Who am I to you?) and he mentions it to Jazz. Who goes insane that Danny didn’t even question it and just went with “meh, probably haunted” as his explanation for the phenomenon for all these years.

Apparently, if Jazz was right, he had a soulmate who was uh, super fucking smart. That was an overwhelming thought.

The next day Danny is in crisis mode and writes back “Wait, WHAT AM I TO YOU??? Can I help on your homework??”

Danny gets vindicated when the writing on his arm presents a shit ton of dates and information for an unsolved Gotham cold case. See, Haunted.

———

Eventually between Danny becoming the top candidate for astrophysics at Wayne Enterprises and Tim Drake being outed as having contributed tips to the GCPD that solved cold cases- they meet and realize just how dumb they’ve been.

[stealingyourbones]

Never will I stop with the steadfast notion that folks in the DPXDC fandom should interact with at least some form of canon DC media.

There are comics, tv shows, radio dramas both old and new, podcasts, movies, magazines, so much shit that intentionally avoiding the media is simply preventing yourself from spawning new ideas and gaining a new appreciation for a fandom that you’re already in.

The Superman Radio Show has episodes 11 minutes long. A lot of the TV shows don’t have episodes that surpass 30 minutes and most are nearly fully clipped on the official DC YouTube channel. The amount of fan made motion comics is astounding. The amount of fanmade animations is equally as incredible.

[common-world-domination]

JOHN: he doesn't have a dog?

DAVEPETA: B33 < maybe hes talking about karcat

and then they all watched the mlp:fim movie and proceeded to get into a heated argument over character analysis afterward. john interrupts them all by going "well i like pinkie pie! she's silly." and they all just stop arguing and are like yeah. yeah pinkie pie is silly.

[maudiemoods]

Megaplex was AWESOME and I WILL be going again next year (hopefully) and possibly with a silly suit!! Depends on if I can make it!!

I really like my alien kitty BUT I love chaos so i mashes him and I together into a furry so YAY this is what I plan on making!!!

[nellasbookplanet]

I do think that referring to Essek as irredeemable for regretting his actions only because he was caught and risked losing his friends is both kind of reductive to him as a character and a misunderstanding of the concept of redemption arcs in media.

A person generally isn't changed because you sit them down and hand them a bunch of political theory to read. They change because their circumstances and relationships do. It's like that guy who was deradicalized because he got a bunch of shrimp and started to care for them. It’s our relationships that change us, because they give us not a logical but an emotional reason to do so.

Caleb explicitly says "these people will change you" (or something along that line; I don’t remember the exact quote). Essek, before the m9, didn’t genuinely care about anyone. The people who would die if a war started because of his actions were irrelevant and abstract to him. Caleb, similarly, also started c2 not really caring about others. He had no interest in taking on Ikithon or the Assembly to save others from going through what he did, too preoccupied with his own trauma and his own goals to care. In that sense, he started the campaign in a similar place as Essek post ep. 97: regretful, but too busy wallowing in his own self-loathing to productively do anything to prevent future harm due to his previous actions.

Being with the m9, being reminded of the importance of other people and realizing that they’re capable of caring for them, is what changes Caleb and Essek both. Of course Essek starts out more concerned with losing the nein than with strangers killed in a war. They’re his starting step, the opening through which he realizes that the people hurt by his actions are real, that he cares, that he has the ability to, if not undo his harm, help stop furthering of it.

[b0wi3sgir1]

Marauders and Reg group chat

Remus: who the fuck added me to the group chat?

Sirius: >:O language.

Regulus: yeah watch your fucking language.

Sirius: OKAY WHO TAUGHT REGGIE TO SAY THE FUCK WORD?!

Peter: ‘the fuck word’

James: You guys use the f word all the time??

Regulus: Merlin’s beard you don’t have to censor it.

Peter: say fuck James.

Regulus: Do it, James. Say fuck.

[doghart]

i’m catching up on tsv, i think something that eskew prod does extremely well is using horror absurdism to capture the absurd horror of capitalism. it’s clear in eskew too, but i think it’s especially fantastic in the silt verses. the casualness with which sacrifice is discussed. how red lobster has a god that has and continues to take human sacrifice, and so do cereal companies, cops, and the grueling start up that has a “fun room”. it captures EXTREMELY well how it feels to live under capitalism, that you’re constantly bombarded with horrible things, discussed cheerily in a nice tone. the way it’s simultaneously numbing, hysterical, and horrifying. i think i was especially fond of how in ep 39, protest against sacrifice was taken as radical, a propostorus, idealistic thing that’s just so SILLY it’s not even worth considering, something that feels very real to revolutionary organizing/protest irl. i also liked how despite the face, when everything gets down to it, when everything is about profit, all people come down to are bodies. all capitalism is a gaping maw, and it eats the poor and marginalized first, but doesn’t STOP eating just there. the very literalized version of this, where the profit wheel (and all that includes— war mongering, the prison industrial complex, wage labor, etc) is given a very real literal set of teeth, but the body count is the same. so the electric company has a god, and so it takes humans sacrifice. do real electric companies not have a very real human cost? overworked and underpaid labors looking to make rent, or well off comfortable employees no less likely to get the axe under profit margins, or the blood shed when colonizing in the first place, in clearing the space for the electric company to move in. is that not also a very real human sacrifice? the commercial aimed at elderly people talking about “back in my day, we would just talk about all this human sacrifice and find a compromise :)” is so bleakly hysterical, but is that not very accurate? that you can put a good face on it, but in the end what it comes down to is that you’re being sold the chance to be human fodder? that there is no glory or honor on a battlefield or in working yourself to death, just mud and shit and bodies to throw at problems. idk! i’m rambling but it’s a deeply engaging podcast.

[egophiliac]

OH YEAH HIS TAIL ALSO LIGHTS UP

here's a bunch of quick reactions to some of the smaller bits, while I work on bigger things for the bigger bits and obsess over Silver's breakdown some more. don't be fooled -- this is only the beginning of my descent into pure diasomnia hell.

(I also need to figure out how to draw OB Mal better)

[spacedlexi]

"sounds nice... having a partner"

[whineandcheese24]

can’t believe sokka spent 3 seasons telling dad-jokes, likes expensive atlases, viscerally hates getting sidetracked on road trips, thinks he’s the greatest detective, carries a beard with him as a disguise, pretends to not like physical affection but secretly loves it (see group hug in the earth king), is obsessed with meat, is constantly sarcastic and complaining, is overprotective of his sister, LITERALLY HAD A WHOLE ARC ABOUT WANTING TO MAKE HIS DAD PROUD AND ENDED UP LEADING THE INVASION FOR HIM, and y’all still have the audacity to call ZUKO the Dad Friend

[twelvemartha]

Thank you. For everything. It was my pleasure.

[triglycercule]

nightmare viewing the murder time three as little toys but more in like a little spoiled kid kinda way. because it would be funny and if you take into the account that he was like 6 before getting corrupted and do some mental loopholes it would be even funnier. like these are his dolls (killer dust and horror) and this is their barbie dreamhouse (his castle). they all have to stay in one room because nightmare needs to keep his toys in a toy box. the toys only ever come out when he wants to play but oh damn it they keep on breaking out!! silly toys,,, and then he locks them into the room again.

nightmare serves them food with plastic tea cups and plastic plates and there is no food. there is no tea. they have to imagine the food because dolls can't literally eat. there are food containers and stuff in the house but its all just a bunch of empty boxes. horror starts tweaking out after he scavenges the kitchen and finds a cereal box and milk carton that have NOTHING in it (why keep empty boxes?????)

they have to go where he wants them to go. nightmare gets to dress them up in whatever he wants because theyre his dolls they can wear anything he wants. it gets incredibly embarrassing when the trio is forced to wear pink pretty dresses and fight like that. or they have to go around the castle doing stupid fucking roleplays and it gets weird because theyre being forced to reenact a bullying scene and nightmare's giving them the death stare if they don't get it right (is this projection. this must be some form of coping mechanism dust theorizes)

and then you know nightmare's not exactly the best toy owner so he loses a few of his dolls here and there. maybe they get destroyed when he was playing a bit too rough with them! (killer dies in battle for like the 29th time) but its okay because he can just go back on down to the store (something new) and buy. wait no. steal another doll and then put it back in his dreamhouse and BOOM he has a full set again!! so sweet so cute. his dolls don't have consciousness what are you talking about theyre begging to be let go?? that's all just your imagination. what do you mean you're asking about the several slowly dying bodies with removed arms or legs in his dungeon. oh that's just where the broken but not yet destroyed toys go dw theyre fine its humane