#made me copy paste this whole thing from my notes PARAGRAPH BY PARAGRAPH | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mjolnirswriststrap · 1 year

Text

You’re The Reason I Smoke

_____________________

Summary- reader needs something to take the edge off, and doesn’t know super soldiers can’t really get drunk.

Bucky x f!reader

Warnings: smoking, alcohol consumption, Bucky roughly grabs your face, that’s all 😇

Masterlist

This is my first Bucky fic, so go easy on me, there will be mistakes, my only hope is that I get better with practice ❤️

Edit: I’ve fixed some things and found out there was a whole paragraph missing, do not copy and paste from notes app! 😂

You just wanted a quick drink of water from the kitchen, you didn’t expect him to be there, leaning against the counter. White tank top tucked into navy blue slacks, a black belt with a golden buckle shines at you. He was quite literally, halfway undressed, you couldn’t help but to glance at his arms, both stunning in their own way. You favored the left, the thought of what it could do was enough for you. These kind of thoughts are why you smoke, and you need to right now. Having fantasies about your coworker isn’t good for your health. You quickly grab a cup filling it half way: taking a sip before dumping it down the sink, walking out without interacting with anyone else in the room. Strolling out the front door of Stark tower, you spot your favorite green bench. It doesn’t have any particularly favorable qualities about it, except for Tom, the old man that sat himself there everyday, protesting everything Tony was doing. It had been a month and it didn’t seem like he was going anywhere so you made friends. An eyebrow raise and an offer of cigarettes was all it took for Tom to open up. After hearing him out, you kind of agreed with him and not your current boss.

Your eyes search the surrounding area and your smile falters. There’s no Tom, no sign saying “no more playing god”. Sighing, you sit alone, ripping open a new pack, sliding a single cigarette out instead of two. You feel around every pocket before you realize you left your lighter on your dresser upstairs. Which was weird since you always lay it on top of your pack. You look around seeing a newsstand that sells some basic necessities, down the street, behind some food trucks. You start to feel triumphant before you think about the fact; your wallet was also left on your dresser.

You tell yourself surely someone is going to be leaving soon and you’ll just wait and borrow a dollar from Nat, Sam or Wanda. As if the moment could be any worse, you see a wall of a man walk out the front door of the tower. Just the sight of him makes your nerves vibrate, you can’t decide if it’s a good or bad buzzing. You’re casual with each other, never too friendly and never unpleasant. To him and everyone else, you two were just regular coworkers. To you, you were the office crusher and he the brooding, well mannered super soldier, you’re crushing on. Maybe he’d be a nice coworker and lend you a dollar, or maybe he won’t and you’ll look stupid. Your brain continues to overthink as your feet take you to catch up with his large paces. It was a hike to get up to your room and having to come all the way back down just didn’t really feel worth it, so, humiliation it is!

“Hey Sergeant.” Bucky stops in his tracks, slowly turning around. Softly smiling when his eyes land on you, “Hey Птичка, what are you doing hanging around out here?”. You take a breath, processing him, processing the use of the Russian name he always calls you, Google can’t help you translate since you have no clue where to even start. He could be calling you dumbass, which is the most probable scenario in your mind. “I just came out for a quick smoke, and to see my guy, but he’s not here today and I forgot my lighter so I’m 0 for 2.” You scratch your neck, dryly laughing.

Bucky slowly shook his head up and down as you spoke, as if he was interested in every word you said, hopeful you say “I was wondering if you had a dollar I could borrow? I left my wallet upstairs and I really need a lighter right now. I will have one crispy dollar waiting for you when you get back,” you pleadingly look between his bright eyes, you finish your plea with a “, scouts honor.” And a look of seriousness. “You know, you really shouldn’t smoke those things, they could kill y’a.” Bucky says as he reaches into his pocket, handing you a 20 dollar bill. “That’s too much, I just need a dollar Bucky!” You say, shoving his hand back into his chest. “Well,” He smiles, grabbing your hand, putting the 20 in it. “, I dont have anything smaller.” You thank him, promising again to have his money waiting when he got back, not mentioning the slight scolding he just gave you. Your lung health seems out of ordinary for someone like Bucky to think about or even care for.

You hear a beeping sound coming from his pocket, without checking it, Bucky says “Sorry to cut this short but I really have to get going or I’m gonna be late.”, giving you an apologetic look. You shake your head no before words formed in your mouth “no of course, I’d hate to hold you up, got a hot date?” You shot off that last part without thinking, you internally scream at your attempt of small talk. “Something like that, Steve’s idea.” You die a little on the inside, the buzzing turning into a throbbing in your skull. You pray the obvious blind date fails miserably as you wave him off, watching his back as he walks away.

Briskly you make your way to the stand, purchase a lighter and go sit down on your bench again. Except this time, “where the hell did my cigarettes go?” You say patting your pockets looking around the bench.

_____________________________

Bucky watches from the window as you stand there in shock, wondering where Tom is. He flicks your lighter, open and then closed, again and again as he watches you sit down and fumble with the cancer sticks that have some sort of hold on you. He secures his tie before walking towards the elevator. Sure, Bucky had smoked once or twice at a bar when he was younger. But that was then, and now science knows what they can do to people, he knows what they could do to you. He didn’t care when other people smoked, just you. Bucky couldn’t wrap his head around it. He felt an instinctual urge to protect you from hurting yourself. Thank God you weren’t a field agent and he didn’t have to constantly watch your back when guns were involved. It would be a lot harder for him to conceal his minor infatuation with you. You run laps around his head, even as he’s making his way through the lobby and out of the tower to have dinner with someone else, a girl Steve swore was the one. He couldn’t blame his friend for trying to get him back out there, it had been 70 years.

He knows you won’t be successful in your little smoke break. Thanks to his lock picking, he held your silver zippo in his pocket as he nonchalantly walked out the front door, keeping his eyes to the right, purposely ignoring your burning stare. He didn’t expect to hear feet running up behind him, or hear your sweet voice. The sound of his title fell so easily off your lips. You were the only person who called him Sergeant, everyone else seemingly knew it was reserved just for you.

Bucky listened intently as you made a case for a dollar loan. He would give you a million dollars if he had it, he just didn’t know how to show it. Too thick of a skin had grown over his heart for him to be able to tell you how he felt. Not being able to deny you, he hands over the first bill he pulled from his pocket, taking the opportunity to distract you by grabbing your hand, his other hand slips the little cardboard box from your loose hoodie pocket. You don’t notice as he slides them into the pocket of his slacks.

He’s about to walk away when his phone beeps, signaling he was already late for his so called date. He would rather stand here talking to you all night. Wanting to end the night before it even started Bucky said his goodbyes, and was almost home free, till you said hot date. He couldn’t lie about this, so he assured you it was Steve’s idea. He played it cool as he walked away, but inside, he hated the way your face fell when he confirmed your suspicions. He could almost say, you looked jealous. He knows you feel something for him too, but without Bucky being able to tell you how he feels. It’s going to be a never ending loop of will they or won’t they.

_______________________

It was late, and Bucky still hadn’t come to get his 20 back. You knew the money was an excuse to go down stairs, light one up and wait for him to get back. You truly just wanted to know how his date went, would there be a second? Leaning against the brick wall you take a long drag as you pull your hoodie tighter around you.

Bucky turns the corner and sees you standing there, cigarette dangling between your fingers, you looked irresistible. Maybe it was the nightmare of a date, or maybe it was him clearing out the pub down the street of draft beer. He especially thinks it was the way your lips perfectly wrapped around the orange tip. He didn’t have much time to pin point a reason why before he sprung into action. He stalked towards you, you smiled, opening your mouth to speak but before you could say anything, he rips the cigarette from your hand, throwing it to the ground and smashing it under his boot. He grabs your chin, staring into your eyes. Your breathing matched each other. You didn’t pull away, you didn’t move yourself from his grasp, Bucky could smell the staleness on your breath, he was so close he could feel your deep gasps fan across his face “I don’t want to see you with those things again, got it?” He hides his real frustration.

You’re confused, one second it’s casual Friday with this guy and now he’s pressuring you to quit smoking in the horniest way possible. You shake your head, agreeing that you got it. You weren’t actually going to quit because he said so, but whatever got him away from you and kept you from doing something you regret. You could smell the alcohol on him. You knew he wasn’t in a right state of mind, maybe he just really hated smoking and cared about your well being, he just came on a little too strong due to the drinks. You’ve dealt with plenty of drunks before, so you decide to change the subject. You loosen yourself from him, careful not to push him away completely. “How was your date, Sergeant?” You ask innocently.

One word was enough. Bucky can’t take it anymore, still close enough to do the one thing that would convey everything he felt, he leans forward and presses a light kiss to your lips, quick and gentle, barely there. It was enough to cause all the buzzing inside of you to stop. Everything stopped, the cars passing, the traffic lights changing, pedestrians walking by, the low hum of people in their apartments. The world disappeared, and all you could see was Bucky standing in front of you. Before you could protest, refusing to take advantage of a drunk person, Bucky blurts out “You ruined it. All I could think about was you. Everything she said was wrong because she wasn’t you.”.

You’re stunned, like all the air was removed from your lungs, you know you can’t take what he says now for certain, but it felt good to hear it. “Would you rather it have actually been me?” You say feeling brave. Bucky breaks eye contact at your question. He doesn’t answer as he faces the ground and lets his hair mask his emotions. You take his face in your hand, mirroring your stance moments before, you lift his glassy eyes to meet yours. “Yeah.” Was his response after searching your sincere eyes. You were playing a dangerous game with your own heart. You knew whatever you got into tonight with Bucky, would be just that, tonight only. It would only lead to more heartache. You decide to be a good friend right now, not a coworker, not a peer, not a hookup.

“You look tired Buck, let’s get you up to bed.” You receive no response as Bucky just watches you, gauging your reactions to him. You smile lightly and gently tug on his arm “I’ll even tuck you in, if you make this easy on me” you say referencing the maze of a tower you have to drag a drunk man through. It earns a “deal” from Bucky, which is enough for you to start moving towards the door. To your surprise, Bucky walked fine, stood up straight the whole way up the elevator. No lost shoes or throw up like a normal person. He physically showed no signs of being drunk, but his words screamed to you that he was intoxicated.

You point to a door, silently asking if it was the right room. Bucky nods, procuring a key from his pocket. You take it from him, assuming he has no hand eye coordination in his state. You jimmy open the door and let yourself in, holding the door wide open for Bucky to stomp in and make his way to the bed. He kicks his shoes off, taking off his tie and jacket, he lays them on the back of a small chair in the corner. “You don’t have to tuck me in, I appreciate the gesture though.” Bucky says lowly, now avoiding eye contact.

Still reeling from the kiss downstairs, you don’t notice Bucky’s change of mood. Nodding your head you bid him goodnight. “Well, here’s your $20 back,” you reach into the slim, side pocket of your leggings, pulling out the promised crispy bill. Bucky doesn’t look up as you place the money on top of his nightstand, he’s too embarrassed. He never should have said those things. He let it bubble up inside and when it finally came out, it wasn’t the right words. Bucky knows his confession sounded harsh. He used to think maybe one day he’d get over himself and attempt flirting with you. But that mission failed before it began.

_________________

Jumping up in a sweat filled haze, you shake the sleep from your head, the dream had been too real, too detailed, and rich; sickeningly sweet. The movie that played on through the night was just a fairytale. It could be real, but it was all contingent on a drunk Bucky. You needed to ready yourself for work, checking your phone you see 7:34 glaring back at you. Since yesterday was a leggings and hoodie day, you figured you’d make yourself presentable for this Saturday morning. Your job in stark tower was an unexpected one, no one else ever had the job or ever will have the job, Tony and Pepper’s lifeline. Pepper makes sure Tony is sorted and you make sure Pepper and the avengers are sorted. You see things Earth’s mightiest heros wouldn’t want anyone else seeing. You wouldn’t say you’re an assistant, or a pr manager, a wrangler if anything. Covering up the red in ledgers, wild nights out, a 17 year old spider who should be in bed for school, the usual at the tower. So what you wore wasn’t really a topic of conversation, if leggings is what the woman with all the knowledge wanted, she’d get to wear them to her 9-5.

Today felt different, you wore a short feminine blazer with a long black pencil skirt. A creme colored chemise tucked behind a single hooked button of your jacket. You walk from your small 3rd floor apartment down to an elevator that would take you to the avengers common room, you would do debriefs at 8 every morning. It consisted of wagging a heavy finger at who embarrassed themselves the day or night before, reminding Peter that his homework is more important than finding bad guys. And today, it wasn’t subject to change. You walk into the room, everyone lazily strewn onto the couches. Pepper being the only presentable one besides yourself. You can feel a thickness in the air as you make eye contact with Bucky, an unspoken “we need to talk” passes between you.

“Good Morning Team, I just wanted to start this day off by saying, you didn’t do too bad yesterday, I’m almost impressed.” you say looking down at your data pad, checking off “introduction” on the meeting schedule. “Sam, you didn’t draw a crowd of fans at the veteran’s food bank yesterday! Gold star for you. Wanda, I know you’re just trying to help, but Ms. Rosita told you to stop trying to teach Carmen magic. She’s only 5.” You finish by giving Wanda a pleading half smile. Some of this stuff should be common sense, you think, as you check off things they’ve heard a million times. “And finally, Peter, mind telling the class why my eyes are on you?” You question, eyebrows raised. You tap your foot, waiting for his response. Peter sits there with his mouth agape, not knowing he’d already been found out. “I uh..I…” he looks around for help. You assist him, “I uh heard someone was being bullied so I webbed Flash to the basketball net.” You shake your head, you know he means well, he just doesn’t pick the best corse of action, every time. “I’m sorry Y/N, Mr Stark. I just couldn’t see Flash hurting people who don’t deserve it, no one deserves to be bullied.” You nod your head at him, “That’s very sweet Peter, but you can’t be a vigilante. I’ll call your Aunt later.”. He groans looking down, fully understanding “Yes, Y/N”.

You sign off on the debrief “well that should be it guys, don’t get into any trouble today, please, it’s bad enough I work weekends, make it easy on me” you giggle, obviously joking, you loved your job. You started making your way out of the common room, heading towards the elevator, you pressed up. Never fully accepting that you worked in the penthouse. you worked beside Pepper in Tony’s office, of course they wanted to keep you close, you knew too much. All it is, is a tiny desk in a corner that’s facing the wall, a modest studio on the 3rd floor, a company credit card and knowing things that could easily get you killed. It wasn’t all food banks and bullies. You sigh as the elevator takes longer than usual. Completely forgetting about Bucky, you’re taken back when he taps your shoulder. “Hey, could we talk?” You nod, stepping away from the elevator. “I just wanted to apologize for last night, I shouldn’t have done or said that. It was out of line.” You smile softly, listening to him. He was drunk so he has an excuse, the fact that he’s standing here practically begging for forgiveness melts your heart. “Sergeant, you have nothing to worry about, everyone drinks a little too much sometimes. You should just be thankful it was me out there and not a paparazzi.” You give him grace, letting him know there is no hard feelings. Bucky looks at you, still ever so confused.He thought the coddling was unusual last night, now he understand why, you thought he was drunk off of human beer.

“Wait Y/N, you do realize my metabolism is so high, alcohol can’t affect me? Maybe the mead from Asgard, but nothing from the pub down the street. I’m apologizing for grabbing you, for telling you what to do, for kissing you, but I’m not sorry for telling you how I feel.”

You’re left speechless at his confession, “I..I uh don’t know what to say.” Scratching the back of your head you kick your toe around trying to make sense of the situation. Before you could, you see a blonde head of hair making their way towards you and the elevator. “C’mon Y/N, you know Tony doesn’t like to wait.” Pepper says, only playfully scolding you. She pulls you into the elevator away from Bucky, before you could say anything she’s waving as the doors close “Have a good day Mr. Barnes.”. Pepper is oblivious to what she just ripped you away from. You couldn’t blame her though, you’d talk to Bucky after work, letting last night play over and over while you sat at your desk.

_________________

PART 2

#bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky x y/n #james bucky buchanan barnes #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes x y/n #avengers #mcu #marvel #bucky x you #avengers fanfiction

125 notes · View notes

wearethewitches · 8 months

Note

Could you maybe gives us a bit of a peak, or insight about the fics you put up to vote? At least maybe the top 3? No pressure, just very curious!

oh i can DEFINITELY do that!!!!!!

Shadowheart, time travelling cleric of Selune; Shadowheart/Aylin/Isobel

disclaimer: i don't have stuff written for this, so i'm copy-pasting a paragraph or two of my vast, vast selection of notes for this fic. i generally write a synopsis of every chapter for my planned fics.

Shadowheart wakes the moment her tadpole is given, protected from Shar's influence and marked for all to see. White hair. Sees everything from a new perspective, shocked at how loyal Lae'zel is to Vlaakith and how genuinely sad everyone else is. Whole thing about being a cleric of Selune instead of Shar, and getting rid of her armour. Gives the relic to Lae'zel and doesn't believe the Emperor when he tries to convince her he's a friend; only Selune's mark protects her divine knowledge of the future and she advises the Emperor not to touch her thoughts unless he has to. Ends up being the party leader for the most part, though abstains from speaking to strangers; adopts their pets without pause and asks Mol if she knows how to find Nine-Fingers, etc., gaining her trust after refusing to steal the idol.

2. Jaheira/Karlach; "Hero Worship"

i do actually have fic written for this, as it's only a one-shot, but i got distracted and forgot to finish it, so when i'm in the mood, i will be finishing + posting this in full - so watch out!

‘Tired?’ came the teasing voice of her best and worst nightmare, Jaheira reaching over to flick a clump of sweaty hair off her eye. The druid laughed at her suffering, ‘Feeling lonely, Karlach?’ Say my name again, the tiefling thought. At Jaheira’s attention she straightened, knee knocking against the table leg, cursing as the abrupt movement nearly spilt hers and someone else’s tankards everywhere. The other tankard, she realised as Jaheira reached to catch them, sliding into the other seat, was Jaheira’s. Shit, she’s sitting across from me. Shit, shit, shit-

Mwahahahaha......and finally-

3. the next chapter of (Selûne, thou) with softest starglow.

oh boy, but have i got a treat for y'all with this one. i've currently got 9k of what i think will be around 40k for the next "chapter" (genuinely wondering if i should split it at some point, tbh. might make it easier, but also ruins my three chapters for the acts, and interlude and epilogue game i've got going) - and i have a new spotify playlist, dedicated exclusively to selune thou.

because i'm nice, i'll put some of the new chapter under a cut for you. how much of it, you ask? oh....only about 350 words. should be enough to make you go "wtffffffffffff!!!" and that's the kind of reaction i love. again, you should expect the new chapter to come out in late february, at the earliest.

enjoy!

excerpt from chapter 4 of selune thou

Smoke billowed from the centre of town, a tower of blackened soot and ash as the house burned, despite the veritable sheets of rain.

‘Fireworks,’ Jaheira rasped, eyes distant as Halsin scrubbed lathered fingers through Shadowheart’s ruined hair. The few other adventurers—Jaheira and Shadowheart having been joined by Lae’zel, Valeria and Astarion that morn—were bitter as they explained the conspiracy to harm refugee children. Exploding toys, Isobel found, were not even the extent of the problem.

Her daughter, mumbling through a bread cauldron of soup, said, ‘There was a house, with a basement full of fireworks. We’re going to track the bastard who lived there down—Astarion was suspicious about what he might have had stashed there, and he was right. We put two and two together. Then I set off a trap. The new family barely made it out faster than we did.’

‘It was like something out of a play,’ Shadowheart hissed, batting her purpling hand against Halsin’s convenient thigh. ‘Oh, you aren’t Loviator! Stop it!’

Isobel watched as the gentle druid halted Shadowheart’s flagellation, quiet words in her ear calming her in seconds. Halsin, she’d discovered, was quite the specimen—and although she was immune to his particular charms, he’d clearly set his sights on more than one of Valeria’s friends.

‘Why does her hand hurt?’ Yenna whispered rather loudly from the other side of the barn. Halsin’s oddity, Minthara had called her, before giving her—and her cat—a tour of the camp herself. Isobel refused to forget what she had told them.

I have known the pain of losing a child to violence.

‘She is cursed by the goddess, Shar,’ the drow explained to Yenna, voice grave, ‘who kidnapped and converted her to Shar’s, quite honestly, ridiculous tenets of loss. Shadowheart rediscovered that she was a Selûnite acolyte quite recently, and so the curse is doing its very best to remind her who took advantage of her for nigh on forty years.’

The young girl’s eyes—her skin pink underneath, a sign that Isobel had best give her a look over sooner rather than later—went wide, before she looked to Isobel and Aylin, asking Minthara, ‘How many Selûne followers are here?’

‘Counting Valeria-’ judged Minthara, grimacing. ‘Four.’

25 notes · View notes

slickchickchocolatier · 2 years

Text

Mermaids Tale - Chapter 1

Alright here we go. First chapter of Mermaids Tale, I think i already mentioned but this story deserves a better title, but we'll stick with it for the sake of ceasing any confusion.

As mentioned in my latest post, I'm adjusting the ML to post the whole storyline of MT, I must...its really quite good and when you read the buildup and the history of the characters, its good. For those of you that want just the good stuff, i'll post ONE chapter of the first smut encounter, just one. This story has alot of smut, among other genres. So there will the best of both worlds here.

Pairings: Heeseung and you

Warnings: Not a whole lot. Mentions of nudity but that's about it.

Summary: Noooooooooooooo....just know, that MT Heeseung is really...sexy. This storyline contains a cat and mouse chase type of thing going on. Lots of hunter and fleeing prey vibes.

Side note, i think they finally fixed my tumblr because posting is alot less of a pain. Seriously, the chapters i've posted so far for each series, some of the grammar errors and structure errors are bc this thing would not let me copy and paste, i had to like re-write each paragraph into the box as i was looking at the draft. So there may have been alot of typos and stupid mistakes in those, apologies.

The sound of the busy city buzzes in your ears as you monopolize through the crowds.

Passing by a line of shops and rows of canopy tents of casual eatery, you keep a hollow face as you remain hidden beneath the bill of your hat. You strut through, strategically making way towards the path of a shorter route leading to your home.

Your hair lays bundled up under your headpiece, eyes remain forward under the hovering cloth, and your body’s form, out of sight and beneath a large sweatshirt. The lengthy shape of your legs made out by the fitted jeans that cover them, and the slight exposure of soft skin on your forearms, revealed by slightly rolled sleeves, remain as your sole identifiable features that are seen.

Carrying out your habitual trend of hiding beneath cloth, and shadow when traveling hasn’t been the most pleasant routine.

However, throughout the course of events in earlier years, you’ve learned and been warned of, the dangers against you. For each time you leave shelter, you place yourself at risk of exposing yourself and suffering the unimaginable, putting an end to your bloodline.

The fate of your bloodline, as mentioned, solely relies on you. Carrying the task of preserving it comes with dire responsibilities and measures, something that you have been doing for many years, yet still haven’t grown entirely used to.

You turn around a corner leading into a marketplace alley. It’s a shortcut you normally take to get back home, saving you a half hour from walking among crowds, which never made you feel easy. Not after you learned of your secret.

The moment you projected the turn, the owner of one of the food tents accidently bumps into you, as he was making his way to customers bringing them hot jasmine tea.

His body was forced back from the impact, as was yours. The ceramic dishes that were neatly staged on the platter fall and shatter on the stone tile. The young man peeks up through recovered squinted eyes and sees that the contents of the teapot had sullied your entire sleeve.

Noticing the color of the material becoming darker from the splash, his face grew into great concern when he saw the skin on your arm glisten at the reflection of a nearby streetlight.

The vapors emerging from your arm are noticeable, as well as the blotches of the bright red shade that takes over the natural hue of your pigment, and the stunning glow you were born with.

He begins apologizing theatrically and calls out to the neighboring canopy owners.

A group of elderly shop owners come to attend to the wound on your arm, suppressing the discoloration with wet cloths and ice. One woman runs back inside her boutique to find a first aid kit, while the others remain in a frenzy as they place effort into treating the burn.

But there was no burn, at least in a somatosensory manner, not visually.

You reassure them that you’re fine, despite their urging in taking you to a hospital. You softly shake your head and thanked them for their care, you further your efforts in convincing them by smiling and waving, appearing as jovial as possible while you continue your way through the alley.

As a child, you didn’t realize that your inability to feel physical touch, vibration, or any sensation for that matter, was really something to be concerned of. Truth be told, you still don’t. In fact, you prefer it that way. Regardless of countless moments where teachers, friends, and family all grew concern over your “defect”, you personally found it convenient.

You would be lying to yourself if you deny ever being curious on what it is like, to feel temperature, roughness, pressure, tickle, itch, pain, pleasure, cloth, skin, and tingle. But you realize that whatever it was that you were missing, you couldn’t possibly be yearning for it if you’ve never experienced it. As depressing that may sound, your “defect” saved yourself the emotional traumas of pain and sadness, which is something you had no problems feeling.

It started when you were six, after your dog Lucy had passed away. You were sad because you missed her greeting you, the way she kept you company and played outside, and the sound of her adorable whines whenever she wanted a doggy treat. You developed a bond with her out of pure emotion because the times that she licked your face, when you pet and rubbed her ears or her belly, or when you held her in your arms, it wasn’t possible to develop any fondness out of the physical compassions of love for her. You never felt it. Which somehow, you believe, may have placed limitations on the strength of your bond with her. Since everything you felt was out of pure emotion, the number of traits that would cause your grief was limited, therefore you were able to accept her loss much faster.

There were other times too, like the moments where your friends would experience a broken heart or betrayal at the discretion of a loved one. Events such as this is what made you the most grateful. After witnessing the times when a dear friend would come to you for comfort, shattered by the hands of a man who used and abandoned her, you came to understand that the degree of her sadness and heartbreak was enhanced due to her physical relation with that man. Thankfully for you, you could only imagine, not that you would.

You found it very disturbing that regardless of how many times your friend had experienced the ruthless abandonment of her lover, all conducted after a session of sexual intimacy. No matter how many times he left her, she would always welcome him back with open arms, enabling him to do it all over again. Whenever you had asked her why she would even permit herself to let him in again, her response was the sealant of any curious thought you had in the sense of touch.

“I know he’s going to leave, and I wasn’t going to. But then he kissed and hugged me, and I just couldn’t help it, I needed to feel him again. Have you ever gone without sex for weeks Y/N? Its brutal! I got desperate.”

Her words drifted through your brain. What would she have said if you had divulged the fact that, regardless of you being 109 years old, you never had sex. You heard from friends you made along the way of their experiences, and quite frankly, it never appealed to you. It may just be one of those moments where the coined term “you had to have been there” applies heavily to it, which of course, wouldn’t matter for you. The loss of the sense wasn’t just limited to your skin, it was internal as well. You recall the time when you nearly had a close call in exposing your secret.

It was while you were with a group of co-workers, the lot of you all deciding to have lunch at a sushi bar. A moment of carelessness resulted in everyone being confused when the waiter brought out the tea and poured it into each of your cups. You were the first to drink, and upon noticing you sipping from your cup, a fellow co-worker across follows suit and takes a sip.

The sound of the cutlery clashing, the blood curling scream, and smaller dishes shattering on the floor, overfilled the entire restaurant as she jumped up and covered her mouth. The tears streamed down her face as she shouts for ice and water, the remaining group stood off to the side with puzzling looks.

“Too hot! My mouth is burning!”

She panicked as her mouth begin to blister and her lips turned red.

“Why didn’t you let it cool down?”

“I thought it was already cooled down! I saw Y/N drink from her cup, so I thought it was okay!”

The poor girl exhausting her sobbing words as she popped ice cubes in her mouth, desperately trying to relieve herself from the burn.

The group looked your way, they also noticed your lips were bright red, and now that you think about it, you may have had blisters in your mouth as well, but how were you to know?

You played off that whole experience by telling them that you had a damaged nerve syndrome. That’s been your go-to excuse for as long as you could remember, there was no other way other logic that you could use for moments like that one.

You finally make it to your apartment.

Looking down at your arm, you noticed the redness was beginning to swell a bit, ironic that you couldn’t feel the pain from injuries such as this, yet you were susceptible to the damage it would cause. Everything has its ups and downs you suppose.

Migrating to your bedroom, you glanced over to the all the vintage photos of your mother, father, and your siblings.

Managing life by changing your name every decade, relocating, and cutting off ties with friendly relations after a certain amount of time had passed, it wasn’t easy for you to succumb to emotional moments of loneliness. Your life was always moving, nothing was constant or stable, at least not for too long. The only time when you would feel saddened was whenever you looked at the photos of your family, who have all been passed away for years already. The remaining relatives you had from your brother and his wife, your cousins, nieces, and nephews fully remain unaware of your existence, there was no way you could explain that, while they were significantly younger, your appearance had remained unchanged since the year you turned 22. The moment you blossomed into a young woman, no longer having the pre-mature attributes of a girl, you were at your true feminine form and had remained as such. Just like your mother.

A flashback drives past your mind for a moment, you remembered it so vividly.

“Y/n, do you want to join us? We’re doing game night.”

Your younger brother implores you to join, and normally you would, but tonight was different.

“No thanks Matthew, I want to go out for a night walk on the beach. Tell mom and dad I’ll be back after a bit.”

“Are you sure? Do you want me to come with? I don’t think mom likes it when you go out by yourself, remember? She said that a 15-year-old girl should never be out on her own in an unfamiliar place.”

“I’ll be fine, this is private property, and the beach is just right across from the house. I’ll be back in an hour.”

At that, you left the old beach rental your family reserved for the trip to Greece. It was your first time there and it became your favorite place in the world. There was something about the land and the Aegean Sea that surrounded it. It gave you a feeling of familiarity, the same sense someone would get when they go home for the first time in many years. It was nostalgic. Yet, that wasn’t the only thing that made you feel sentimental.

You didn’t know why, but up until that year you pondered the puzzling fact that, while your defect inhibited you to feel physically, there was something about the ocean that contradicted that.

You had found out about it initially when you were 7-years old, your family took a trip to a beach nearby home. The hot sand was too much for your family, and they knew it wouldn’t affect you since the family doctor was the one that initially told your parents of your “nerve damage”.

Despite hearing their calls to you, bidding you to stay put with them, you ignored their yells and ran to the shallow waters. It was the first time you had ever seen the ocean, and you were attracted to its appeal the way magnets attract iron.

With your feet stepping into the water, you were shocked to realize that there was something transpiring. There was a sensation that you’ve never experienced before, and you didn’t know what to call it. Looking back, you know now that it was the temperature of the water. Yes, the temperature. Not only that, but the swirling whirlpool swishing around your ankles, the wet sand riding in between your toes, the jagged tips and points of rocks and seashells, and the feel of the gravitational pull as the water receded, only to return at your feet once more when another rolling wave had hit.

For the first time, you had felt the powerful sense of touch.

You never mentioned the experience to your family, there wasn’t any particular reason, you just felt content that you were able to experience the sensation for once. But you quickly realized that your ability to feel only occurred when you were in the water. The ocean waters.

You exit through the back kitchen door, skipping towards the shallow waves. The rental was just far enough from the water, a single person such as yourself walking amongst the wet sands couldn’t be seen easily at night. But you weren’t concerned at all, there was absolutely no one in sight and that’s how you preferred it, because now you’ll be able to freely express your joy once you reach the shallow waves.

The moment the water rushed over your skin; you rediscover the sense of touch once more.

Of all things in this earth for you to feel, you were eternally grateful that it was the ocean. You felt as equally grateful as you breached the waters belonging to the beautiful Aegean Sea. It was the first time you get to experience water that was foreign, exotic, and mystical, much different than the local beaches back home.

Before placing our feet in, you took a second to watch the bubbles of the sea foam riding the waves. It was so pretty to look at. The foam resembled white clouds as the bubbles looked like crystals, reflecting twinkles of glistening light reflected by the moon. Assorted pastel color prisms coated each bubble as you watched them roll back into the sea for the next wave.

You walk along the shallow end, kicking your feet to create small splashes as you twirl in your summer dress. Apart from the sense of touch, nothing ever changed your experience in the water, up until a feeling hit you. It was a sensation you didn’t recall feeling in the water before, but it stung with a vengeance. You couldn’t put your finger on what was happening, but you knew based off your recollections of witnessing similar reactions with other people, the sensation you felt was the first in your life.

Pain.

The overwhelming reaction of having to feel pain for the first time caused you to collapse, the stinging sensation grew worse. You panicked. Unable to fathom what was going on, your mind tried to process at the sensation you were succumbing to. Drowning with confusion and fear, you realized that, unlike the waters back home, there was something about the waters belonging to the Aegean Sea, and your body was reacting to it.

Fear and shock took over your emotional senses, covering the unpleasant sense of physical pain as legs grew weak, too weak.

The stinging hit every inch of your legs from the hip down, and for a moment you wondered if you had been stung by jellyfish or perhaps bitten by a poisonous sea snake.

To your horror, you screamed as you looked down at your legs, finding that you no longer had them. Not anymore.

Instead, they were replaced with a long, graceful tail and fin. You shuttered in fear, noting that the lower half of your body was now covered with fish scales.

You couldn’t move from the sandy spot you were laying in. Your panic heightened as you attempt to use your upper body strength to crawl away from the water, but the pull of the waves as the tides rolled in enabled the receding sand to sink you down, practically gluing you stuck and your lower half remaining in the water.

As the currents grew stronger, and no one in sight to hear or see you, your body was slowly but surely getting pulled in deeper into the water.

Each wave dragged you in deeper, your whole body was nearly entrenched in the shallow water, yet it was becoming easier to move, so long as you were going in the direction of the deep end. You felt exhausted from fighting against the waves, so you laid there in defeat. Your wet hair was plastered all over your face, the transformation of your lower extremities caused the ruffle lining of your dress to shred.

Noticing that the stinging pain was no longer present, you closed your eyes and found comfort in feeling the soothing sensation of the water showering your entire body. The feeling that you normally enjoyed.

You closed your eyes and laid your cheek down on the wet sand before you, not sure if you just needed a break or if you had entirely given up and assumed you were going to die in that spot. Within seconds after closing your eyes, another wave rolls in, covering you entirely. As it pulls back, revealing every shell and rock that laid thickly underneath the sand, the raging current drags you one final time, fully submerging you in the water.

The feeling, opposed to what you felt moments earlier, was beyond amazing. Even though the temperature of the water was cooler, you felt warm and secured. The swooshing of the current wraps around you and glides against your skin.

Your whole body felt the touch of everything around you. The pale silver scales glowed contrasted against the shadowed depth around you. Considering how dark it was underneath the surface, your view was as clear as glass. Everything you laid your eyes on, you were able to see its finer details, no matter how small or large it was.

You could hear the echo calling of whales, even though they were meters from where you were at. It appeared that not only did you gain the sense of touch by being in the water, but your other senses remain unimpaired. They actually seemed enhanced under water.

As tempted as it was to savor the environment you were in, you started to get worried that your mother would come look for you, especially since your time outside was breaching the final moments of the hour. Though you weren’t entirely sure how you would go see her in the state you were in.

You swam back to the shoreline, although it didn’t feel like swimming, more like gliding. You found it was so easy to move in the water, and you were moving in a speed that you’ve never was faster than any moving car you rode in.

Beaching yourself as you reached the shoreline, you turn to admire the pale-silver color of your tail.

The fin was large and fanned out, the skin that stretched over the frame was semi-transparent, and it glistened with a sheer blend of pastel colors, the same as the seafoam. Two spurs outlined the out corners of the fin as it branched out, they were long, and the tips of them were sharper than any knife you’ve seen.

The scales on your tale all looked like nacre, or simply known as Mother-of-Pearl, reflecting the wide hue of colors to bounce off the silver base. The amount of scales lessened just past your pelvic bone, revealing the skin you were familiar with. Had there been more time you would have removed your dress to see how much had changed with your upper body if it did change. Yet you became more focused on figuring a way to get out of the water, then coming up with an explanation for your appearance.

Moving was hard, compared to how it was in the water, now that you had laid ashore it felt nearly impossible. Finding yourself stuck yet again, the only manner to get farther away from the water was to crawl using your upper body. Digging your elbows into the murky sand, you struggled to find some level of stable foundation as you felt yourself sinking in.

Noticing the partial burial of large rocks all around, you reached for the exposed surfaces, grabbing on to the points and edges. Using the moment of your body to shift in the direction you needed to go, you exhausted every effort by using whatever means necessary to get further up, closer to your destination. The sense of touch begins to fade out, disappearing the further you move away from the water. A bittersweet exchange.

Finally, you reached the dry mounds of sand. Grabbing a handful, you watch as the spilling of dry granules seeps in between your fingers, feeling a sense of accomplishment. You moved upward just a tad bit more, ensuring no part of you, to include the tail, was touching water.

You come to a sudden halt as a familiar sensation hits you. Odd, since you were no longer touching the water, yet the stinging all throughout your lower half re-emerges, and you could feel it just as strongly as you had in the water. You turned over onto your back and saw all the dry granules of sand that coated the scales of your tail. Witnessing the metamorphosis happening before your own eyes, you watched as the beige hue of the sand and the rainbow explosion of color from the scales begin to transform. The merging of colors gradually fades into a hue that matches your skin, while the two long spurs at the corners of your fin begin to recede.

Beginning at the inner triangular tip in the center of your fin, the skin separates, and continues up along the center of your tail, regaining the shape and length of your legs.

Was that all it took? Dry land? Or just being out of the water…these waters.

You didn’t tell your parents what happened that night, you didn’t know how. For the longest time, you wondered if it had been a dream or some type of hallucination. Yet the memory of feeling the water, listening to the whales, and re-visualizing the clarity of your sight, you knew that it was neither.

106 notes · View notes

caffeiiine · 3 months

Note

hi hi i didnt realize i cant like rb or answer anything answered privately which makes sense cuz its meant tobe private but its a lilinconvenient noq that i think about it but anyway answering stuff about the rewrite!!

the idea that angie can accurately replicate handwriting is so good to me ouagh, i wantee to add something where kokichi's signature was different on angie's note than the actual note for evidence reasons but idk if i ever put that in the doc

okok the wuestions now (i do not remember a lot of these things befause of this having been made 2+ years ago BhbBDFIJGBRJK)

- "how did miu not burn the whole jacket?" - i imagine a leon situation. most of it burned, but a part of it fell out of whatever machine miu made to burn the jacket and she just never picked it up (in part bc she didn't feel like it, in part bc she's dual masterminds with kirumi in this world)

- "why did she wear her jacket if she were trying to frame kokichi?" - yeh no i did not think that through FBHEBIJABFUIA i think me from two years ago just wanted an obvious difference to a character that at first wasnt very suspicious but later was like holy shit ur the mruderer AND HERES THE EVIDENCE sorry i have monster im very shaky so im not fixing typos i hope u can read these BEAUIBDFIUDSFBU

- "miu + angie alliance? :3" - in retrospect i so should have done something with that cuz i lowkey love that idea BUAOHAOJHEAJO

- "[...] if there was a rivalry between your s/i and angie bc of the similarish talents" - never thought about it but absolutely i think yes

- "what was the point of the torture post-mortem?" - angie wanted to make it seem like kokichi had dragged my s/i into his lab and tried to get him to help with some plan but my s/i refused (mightve been my reasoning?) and got to the point he tortured him to try to get assistance or something, angie just wanted it to seem like kokichi had tortured my s/i for some reason (cuz atp they all think kokichi is mega cruel mega heartless ygwim)

with a lot of the above questions i came up with this entire chapter within the span of like... a day home alone on a day off i had from school so i never really changed anything after i came up atih it? and i had reasonings for things i just never wrote them doqn properly and was like rambling to myself out loud ot think that day) (my dogs probably thought i was crazy) (i am crazy)

onto commentary comments :3

YESSS KAEDE IS ALIVE!!!! i wanted her and shuichi to both live in this so i made it happen :3 along with them i think kokichi is the only other of the remaining 5 after chapter 6 that would be alive (kirumi's influence, miu's inventions, they caused Despair and Hell snd whatever yadda yadda i tried making it work and i never really fleshed it out)

ENHABHAJDGBIHA YES ANGIE REPLICATING HANDWRITING HS MY HEART BECAUSE I JUST. i feel like shes really good at replicating styles? like art styles, s the ultimate artist yk, so i feel like she could replicate handwriting pretty well too

BAJHAUAHAJ I QANTED TO MAKE HER HVE SOME REALLY OBVIOUS THING WRONG BUT LIKE TRY TO EXCUSE IT OUT OF TRIAL. i made a few crazy angie sprites actually ebcause i wanted to hold on

crazy angies i made cuz i wanted to do that trial insanely ^ i mightve actually made these before i came up with this idea and then i qas like "WHAT IF ANGIE NO COAT AND NO ONE SUSPECTS ANYTHING UNTIL ITS TRIAL EVIDENCE" idk i had no reasoning to make her go to th etrial qithout her coat other than i wasnt cery good at thinking of incriminating evidence

i cannot actually think of a way to reply to the thing aoubt angie assuming and backing it up with atua + that whole paragraph (it is 12:12 in the morning rn as i type this) but hard agree with everything u say there

ALSO YES ANGIE REALIZING "ATUA" FAILED HER AND LOSING HER MIND OVER THAT ACTUALLY!!! YES!!!

u can like copy paste the format for the trial stuff if u want to btw!! with this i tried to make sure i did a lot of looking into what info i needed (i had an "evidence" tab too but i forgot what i was gonna put there so i left it blank + couldve been the truth bullets or smth! maybe the detailed descriptions for them??? idk) but anyway u can copy paste the actual format itself and leave maybe a few things in each thing to dtermine what exactly it is that you can put there idk idk its 12:15 im struggling BSHBSFDHIHA

ALSO YES HRUTAL MURDER, i didnt realize until i read through it again that it is a very brutal murder + generally brutal case and i put a lot of lements in there but i was very over the top 2-3 years ago so i blame that. id do better now if i could erase my memory of making this case and redo it

also ur welcome for accurate dearh times i think i had to actually look up "does a stab to the back of the neck kill you instantly" i htink the fbi has me on their watchlist now because of that alone BFRUIHRUIAHUIHAGHAH

alos yes i Can read tags on privately answered posts, i watned kokichi angst back then so i thought the best way to do that was to make him fall in love with me adn the n kill myself off BSJAHAUHAHHA, alos probably because i would have died immediately in a killing game so i gave myself the benefit of the doubt for it and made myself live for an extra 4 chapters than i probably would actually live

oookay sorry this rotted in my inbox i now have a spare 30 mins to type this 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

OHHKAY OKAY i was thinking that i was thinking it might be a leon thing or similar to that

AH GOT YAHT👍👍 adding on a little i think it’d be silly if she early on in the trial somebody asked her about her coat and she was like “oh, i lost it!” and everyone brushed it off until later a bunch of things come to light and then its like idk insert reaction i can’t think of anything😞😞

ALSO ALSO if we can fit it in somehow we should use miu + angie alliance, only thing now is would miu hang on until the end in order to not get herself tied up in the aftermath? or would she throw angie under the bus the minute things are turning out bad for her kinda like nagito and teruteru? except she definitely wouldn’t be as nonchalant about things as he was, she’d probably be taking everything as an attack against herself and being super defensive. but at the same time, she also has a super weak will and crumples very easy so at that point she might be more focused on minimizing her position as much as possible? idk im rambling <3

and also that’s so real i have several old aus i made on like testing days and stuff that i just never got around to fleshing out <3 and when i looked back on them they just. SUCKED. so i didn’t do anything with them. not saying yours sucked btw just saying mine sucked [like they were HORRENDOUS. trust.]🫂🫂

off topic i love saimatsu so much <3 anyways the kirumi + miu mastermind thing reminds me of hiyoko and ibuki tbh [LOVE them + that pairing] super super off topic once but me and my friend made a crackship once with ibuki + miu and that just reminded me of it mxnxnd

THATS SO REAL AND TRUE IM STEALING THAT HC

WOOO ANGIE SPRITES!!!! she so deserved to be a killer in the main game idc what anyone says

THE ATUA THING IS A DETAIL ID LIKE TO INCLDIE IN OUR REWRITE BTW <33 OPINIONS ON THAT

YAAY i’ve got the general format in my head for whenever i decide to actually sit down and make the doc since i’ve been procrastinating on that so hard😞

this is so off topic but i feel like you were a theater kid at one point, i barley meet people that are very expressive like you and 9 time out of 10 they are/have been theater kids :3

THATS SO SILLY THOUGH, if im being completely realistic id be the first one gone just bc im stupid😞 and id probably complain about people killing in ways that were stupid to me, id be lucky to get to chapter 2 i think unless i was in some position of power nxbdhdb s/i’s are silly and funny

#sodaramblestoomuch #soda ask and answers!#i took 30 mins to type this😞😞 if you happen to reply within the hour i’ll probably reply after 3 btw

5 notes · View notes

ghirahimbo · 1 year

Note

Hello! Big fan of yours (genuinely entertaining the idea of printing a paperback version of Blind, but Now). I was wondering if you had any advice when it comes to writing a long fic, especially in the planning stages? Or if you had any resources to recommend?

aaaaaah, thank you so much!! 💖 full support/permission/whatever from me to get it printed if you'd like to!

eh heh. advice.

To be honest, I don't know if I'm the right person to advise on writing and planning a long fic because I've yet to successfully do that? 😅 BBN started out as a oneshot, fell into being a story as I got ideas to continue it, and almost ended 50k words early before another idea for a story shift around chapter 12 catapulted the story even further along. I do have ideas for longer stories that I've attempted to execute, but obviously I haven't managed that quite yet.

That being said, I do usually have an ending in mind as I write, along with some form of attempted organization 😛 Generally, I keep a loose, chronological outline, either in a notebook or as a document, that contains both story events and character development notes, along with little snippets of writing that I've thought of ahead of time and any relevant story planning discussions I've had with friends copy/pasted from Discord. I also keep a "holding" file to save paragraphs/pages that I delete from the chapter while writing because I change my mind a lot as I go, and it's less threatening to experiment with taking the story in a different direction if I know that the old version is still tucked away somewhere. In fact, I get torn between ideas as I write so often that I have an established practice of making pro/con lists to sort through the benefits and drawbacks of every option, sooooo I'm obviously nailing this whole "planning ahead" thing 😂

For resources, I've listened to a lot of the commonly recommended books (Save the Cat, Stephen King's On Writing, Bird by Bird) and have a general idea of common story structure/the hero's journey, so that's all floating around in my head. I will say that the five-point finale from Save the Cat really helped me structure that last sacred realm scene in BBN, so I think that might be worth checking out, even if it's a bit formulaic. I also own but have not made it through Ursula K. Le Guin's Steering the Craft, though I kind of want to revisit it now that I've remembered that it exists 😂

The book on writing that I've listened to over and over is called If You Want to Write by Brenda Ueland, though I always recommend it with the caveat that the writer was progressive for her time (the 1930's) but uses a few terms that, while acceptable then, wouldn't really fly today. That being said, I love it wholeheartedly. It's the spiritual opposite of books like Save the Cat in that there's no formulas or specific dissection of craft, but it really delves into the writing advice I've most frequently needed, which is to always, always be honest. It's also, as a selling point, quite short, so not a huge investment in money or time, either 😉

Anyway, I hope any of this helps, and good luck with your writing! Kinda bummed that I haven't really had the time for writing or reading lately, but messages like yours make me hope I can get back into it soon 💖

#writing #sorry this sat in my inbox for a bit 😅#it took some time to organize my thoughts

10 notes · View notes

lindszeppelin · 3 months

Note

Just dropping my thoughts here (and thank you, Linds, for the safe space)

This NYT article left me a bit confused. There’s things that we can sort of connect from previous interviews, but now I’m starting to wonder if we’ve never known the real Austin and this is all a carefully crafted persona, like Jeff said. In my heart of hearts, I feel that he’s always been authentic and maybe now he’s starting to retract into an even more private person, which makes me sad, tbh. I don’t know if this makes me selfish, but it’s like, the more famous he becomes, the more guarded, and I wish he could be more of a popular working actor that’s open and interacts a bit more on SM and gives cute insights into who he is, and not this massive mega movie star that’s hidden and cut off from the rest of us plebes because “he’s not like other humans”.

That’s also something that made me a bit uncomfortable, Jeff’s insistence that he’s a movie star like Brando or Pitt, and that that’s what Austin wants. In my opinion, it feels more like Austin just wants to keep working and keep doing interesting things, and be a good actor, and less like he wants to be this mega famous mega movie star, if that makes sense. I’ve always thought and still think that Austin is in it for the craft and not the fame, but Jeff is almost like projecting on to Austin his want for a movie star.

Of note is the whole paragraph on Kaia. She’s still Cindy’s Daughter, Jacob’s ex, and Austin’s current gf. She’s like a pretty, empty vase, that’s all that’s reported of her. Though I find funny they brought up the fact that J and A both played Elvis (though one was Academy worthy haha). It worries me a bit that she was mentioned though and that it’s a serious article, though like the other anon said, it’s a copy and paste. The writer probably added that after the interview and didn’t even mention it to him in person. Still, I do feel the seeds of doubt on what’s really happening in that relationship, if they’re actually going to break up or if they’re going to get more serious.

All in all, though I love reading Austin interviews, but I feel like I didn’t learn much from this one, other than Jeff Nichols being a fanboy, and that Ashley dislocated her shoulder. Bit of a nothingburger really.

The wait until the end of summer is going to be torture!!!

To end on a funny note, I don’t know if I read it somewhere or it was a headcanon of mine, but I always thought he lived in Los Feliz, which seems more his vibe (artsy but not party people), rather than Beverly Hills. Is Coldwater Canyon close to LF? Maybe I’ve always been having this whole thing wrong 😑

He used to live in Los Feliz but not anymore. And Austin has been a private person but he still openly talks about his family, and he used to talk about Vanessa when dating her. And he posted a lot of pictures of them together. That’s the difference here. Austin keeps mum on Kaia because there’s nothing he wants to say that would reflect his genuine feelings

#lindsay's anon asks

2 notes · View notes

cerriddwenluna · 2 years

Note

writer asks: 16, 24, & 25 :p

*cracks knuckles* Alright, lets do this! <3

25) copy/paste a few sentences or a short paragraph that you’re particularly proud of (yes, I'm switching them round cause this deserves to be above the cut ;))

It's an excerpt from my very first published fic Wild Rose, which is still the most honest and raw fiction I have ever written (Note: This is NOT talking about Kurt or Blaine, I could never kill my darlings ;))

“It is going to take time. It has only been a few weeks since our world got turned upside down. We are going to cry and scream and shout and want to break things and not get out of bed some days. And we will let ourselves take that time to grieve the loss of such a vital part of ourselves. We will feel it all, and then, in time, we will learn to deal. We will keep living. We will grieve and grow and miss you forever, but we will live.”

16) are there any characters who haunt you?

Rachel fucking Berry. That damn girl represents every single bully that ever made my life a living hell and I really, really wish I could just despise her but she is so goddamn useful that she somehow keeps sneaking her way into almost everything I write, and not even as a villain... -.-

24) have you ever become an expert on something you previously knew nothing about, in order to better a scene or a story?

The answer is under the cut 'cause I get semi graphic and long winded in the second part because I don't do taboo subjects. You enter at your own risk lol

The irony (yes, I know this is not the definition of that word. Blame Alanis Morissette.) of you asking me this after we spent way too long google streetviewing the highway between Scarsdale and Bushwick yesterday, just to see what the toll gate looked like, is not lost on me. Especially not considering I then went off and followed that entire route past the plethora of graveyards into Bushwick proper and tried in vain to find any building that looked like it could hold the Loft, while you were off actually being a 'sponsible adult xD

But for a serious answer, I research everything I can (even if it is really not necessary), but the most revelatory one was butt sex. As a cis woman who has no practical experience with gay butt sex, I went off into the deep end, and to my great surprise I discovered that the whole concept of 'stretching' as portrayed in some fiction is actually quite unnecessary. Imagine you are massively constipated and you are passing a truly ginormous log. Would you stretch out your anal muscles first? No! The way these muscles are designed means that they can relax and contract as and when necessary (i.e. pooping), which means that the whole 'stretching' is really quite obsolete. A thing that can be necessary, especially when dealing with a partner with limited anal experience, is to get them comfortable and relaxed which in turn means the muscles will give way easier. Despite the pleasure points located in the rectum and anal passage, it is not actually designed for things to be shoved up there, so it is completely normal to need a period of adjustment, just like with any other muscle group that is having to perform in a way they are not used to. So what actually happens when the receiving partner gets 'stretched' is that the muscles are being given an intrusion to respond to, and they will tighten when tense, but loosen when relax. An experienced bottoming partner's muscles will give way much easier because the body has learned it to be a pleasant experience, but someone who is relatively new to anal sex (or someone who is just really tense) would need to learn to relax around the intrusion. And the way to do that is not by scissoring your fingers to force the muscles apart (nevermind the strength you'd need in your fingers for that), but by making sure your partner is relaxed and comfortable. Just sticking a finger in there and gently moving it back and forth will do just fine. Also, you don't need your whole hand up there to reach the prostate, honestly. Note: You're usually better off building up to full penetration when inexperienced, especially when your partner has a massive schlong like so many fics write either Kurt or Blaine, or both, as having. It is never supposed to hurt! Note 2: I feel this might be a bit redundant too, but LUBE IS OUR FRIEND! And more importantly: SPIT IS NOT GOOD LUBE! Just to cover my own ass here, I don't actually claim to be an expert on this. Yes, there are always exceptions, there is no one size fits all, yadda yadda yadda :P

tl;dr... Butt sex, my friends. Butt sex. Oh, and also anal/penile sex toys and gay male sex positions, for funsies.

#ask and ye shall be answered #quizasvivamos #about me #'read more' at your own risk lol #writer asks #there's a PSA of sorts under the cut #if you're interested #in how to have or write butt sex that is #long post

4 notes · View notes

thelostjournals · 2 years

Text

Today we watched the storm.

We moored in a forgotten pier after a few hours of sailing. The island was still visible, the tiny stick that was the lighthouse and a silver light on its end, pointing up. We slept for the remaining of the night, but at dawn, the wind woke us. There was no sunrise, just a thinning of the darkness, enough to let us see dark clouds, rushed by the wind, swirling beasts with hands of lightning and teeth of raindrops,

Maria znała słowa na takie widoki, czarne chmury gnane wiatrem, kłębiące się bestie, ciemnogranatowa kipiel, posiniaczone niebo. Szum deszczu, porywy wiatru, tak głośne, że inne dźwięki tracą prawo bytu. Być może myślała je, zamknięta w krabim truchle pomiędzy zwierciadłami, kiedy całe to piekło pędziło w jej stronę. A być może była zbyt zajęta przeklinaniem mnie.

The island that was my home for the past few years was being devoured. There is no way the herb garden survived this. Mint and chamomille will regrow, but what made this garden a garden, and what made it mine, is surely gone. I left the boat on the shore when the fog came when Maria was my beacon for the first time, and I'm sure it is gone too, broken into splinters along with the pier. And with the tree on the cliff. It was sturdy, but not sturdy enough I don't think.

I bet the birch grove is fine though. Some fallen specimens for sure, but the colony always survives.

The storm got to the town too, and from what we've seen the port didn't survive.

There is no easy way to get to the lighthouse now. But the light stays on, pulsing, like a heartbeat.

Storms are one of my favorite things in the world. Like, top ten. Being alive during the climate catastrophe really rules for me, because there's been a lot of them in past few years.

They are also one of my favorite things to describe and DOES POLISH HAVE WORDS FOR STORMS. I tried to stick to English, but it doesn't have the right sounds, sorry. I suffered enough when I couldn't write about Nathaniels boat "bezszelestnie dobijająca do brzegu". "Noiselessly" is not "bezszelestnie", it lacks the elegance.

Luckily Maria was Polish from the beginning (I'm still on the fence when it comes to the Keeper, I imagined her as a classic London urchin, but on the other hand she did sing an Belarusian song at one point), so I could write a stormy paragraph that sounds as it should. It was also a surprisingly intense, emotional moment roleplaying-wise. Having two languages, one for saying more raw, true things, and the other for normal stuff is a cool concept, I'm going to play with it a bit more I think.

And writing-wise I feel like there's something interesting to tap into here. I wonder if the shape of the words conveys something for the reader, it is the same alphabet after all, if you look at it, you have the rough estimate of the sounds the text would made. Also I feel that a text that reader doesn't understand also relays something, and I'm curious what it is and what it does to my writing.

And of course my friends who are Polish also read this blog, so this is a whole other chapter of meanings and feelings and ways to connect with text.

So overall, even though the story ended in the previous entry, this one is very exciting to me, creatively. I have some interesting questions and no answers and this is all I can ask of a text that I've written half an hour ago.

"You are a beacon" was a great journey. I loved the evocative prompts and the way the game is lyrical, magical and rooted in everyday life, asking me about Keeper's work, making me imagine the island, and while doing that making me feel at home. It's been a while since I imagined a home for myself, I thought I lost the ability to do it, and this game gave it back to me. Once again, check it out, buy it or grab a community copy, play it, imagine a home on an island for yourself. https://radiantfracture.itch.io/you-are-a-beacon

Imaginary homes are a whole other topic though and these notes are already longer than the entry. So just a word about the photo, because it's teasing the next game I'm going to play here: The Flicker and the Fade which you can find here: https://nyessa.itch.io/the-flicker-and-the-fade

I was planning to do something else to be honest, but I had a hard time saying goodbye to Keeper, Nathaniel and Maria and the strange world that I started to imagine, so I thought hey, maybe I can play other solo games to keep building this world? The Flicker and the Fade seems great for that, especially since Keeper and Nathaniel already did a bit of research about constellations.

#solorpg #journaling games #you are a beacon #the flicker and the fade

2 notes · View notes

vsmassl · 7 months

Text

The following was posted on instagram where nobody read it. I was told to post it on tumblr to get more attention.

This is three chapters from my story Project Violence.

Three bootleg demigods escape from their confinement in order to destroy the world.

Any criticism is welcome.

… also, two things. This is straight copy paste from my instagram, that includes other authors notes. This might be converted into comic form.

TW:

Extreme Gore, Human Body Horror, Animal Body Horror, Violence, Descriptions of Puke and Other Bodily Fluids, Cussing, Acts of Fictional Terrorism, Utter Disrespect, Very Stupid Lines, Deaths of Important Religious and Mythological Figures, Descriptions of Panic and Loss.

Author’s Notes

(TA) is just my initials. I placed them throughout this every couple paragraphs to avoid copyright. Just ignore it if you see it. Personally I don’t think this is that annoying, but if it turns out that this story’s been copied at all I’ll probably make this far, far more intrusive. I don’t like to do that, that’s what’s put me off of reading indie books in the past.

IF YOU PLAGIARIZE ME, I WILL PURSUE YOU LEGALLY!!! Don’t do it.

I’m excited for the future.

Anyway:

PROJECT VIOLENCE

By Tytzin S. Alexander

For the last 60 years, the people of New Moon haven’t had to worry about electricity, as during this time, the people have utilized “Project Violence”. Project Violence involved the capture of two gods of war, and the transmutation of their powers into a new human’s soul. Since the transmutation, two men have been fighting in a small underground bunker for their whole lives.

Jujitsu, Boxing, Kung-Fu, Taekwondo, Karate, Lua, Barbarian. Every style of martial arts, every style of weapon usage, every style of fighting these two have mastered to a far greater degree than their original god-like forms. (TA)

Each and every punch, each and every kick, electricity is generated under their feet. As their muscles become stronger, and their blows become more powerful, more energy is gained for the people of New Moon.

However, the people of New Moon became greedy, so they captured a third god of war. Now, instead of transmuting the god of war into a new human, they experimented with what would happen if they used an older human. One who had grasped concepts of life outside of fighting. (TA)

–

He grunted and moaned as he looked down at his shin, which was poking towards the sky. Blood dripped from his fingers and toes, black goo dripped out a hole in his eye. As he looked up, the other guy was preparing another attack. Running towards him at breakneck speed, it was clear that he was gonna go for a jump kick. To avoid this, he swiftly dashed out the way and followed up with a pecking hand attack aiming for the other guy’s neck.

However, though the other guy wasn’t able to move out of the way in time, he was able to redirect his attack. Instead of hitting the other guy’s neck, he instead stabbed directly through his heart. (TA)

The other guy roared in pain and then grabbed his arm and dug his fingers into his skin, then making sure to grab onto the veins, he ripped his arms out wide, and dragged a line of vein and another line of nerves out of his skin.

He screamed in pain, and then opened his mouth, and sunk his teeth into the other guy’s nose, and forcefully ripped it clean off. (TA)

In response to this, the other guy still was holding his veins and a line of nerves, so he began spinning around at an insane speed, and slowly, his veins and nerves were being ripped out his body. About 10 seconds later, they were spinning at the speed of sound, and a large section of his veins, plus a huge portion of his nerves were exposed.

He flops onto the ground, about to die, and then the other guy runs forward and with a leaping kick, breaks his spine in two. And then for a moment, he just stood there, and looked down at his chest, seeing the big hole made in his heart. Suddenly, he felt himself going limp, fell to the ground, and bled out. (TA)

But then something strange happened. Hundreds of hands protruded from both of their mouths, and began to repair their injuries.

No less than 10 minutes later, the both stood back up, all of their injuries gone. Slowly, those hundreds of hands retreated back into their mouths and disappeared. Now they stared into each other’s eyes and began to circle, ready to fight once more. (TA)

Without injuries, they could be easily recognized. Both of them had to be at least 12 feet tall, and were as wide as a semi-truck. Both of them, seemingly made of steel, had not an ounce of fat on their bodies. The only things that were different about the two were their names, skin color, and hair.

The people of New Moon named them after the gods for which they once were. Tyr and Mars. (TA)

Tyr had white skin and silver hair which dripped all the way down his abdomen.

Mars had black skin and an afro which reached 3 feet above his head.

As they both circled around one another, intently staring into each other’s glowing red eyes, they waited for a certain spark in either of their pupils. They both knew exactly what to watch for, and both were easily patient enough to wait. (TA)

And the moment they saw the spark:

Each of them dashed toward each other. Tyr jumped in the air and directed himself towards Mars, and then pointed both his feet directly at where he knew the two would touch. Mars slid on the ground, and directed himself towards Tyr, and then pointed the palms of his hands directly at where he knew the two would touch. (TA)

Upon impact, Mars’ hands exploded as Tyr’s legs went straight through them and his left foot became locked into Mars’ jaw. Mars then bit down on his foot as if to anchor him, and then did a backflip causing Tyr’s face to smash directly into the concrete floor.

As Tyr attempted to stand back up Mars jumped into the air and pointed his feet perfectly flat towards Tyr’s arms, and when he landed, Tyr’s arms were only slightly bashed, but Tyr got them out of the way before Mars could do serious damage. Then Mars attempted to headbutt Tyr while he was down. (TA)

However just before the headbutt landed Tyr had moved out of the way and was suddenly on top of Mars, so he grabbed Mars’ head with his legs and smashed it down on the exact same place where Tyr himself just was.

But Mars moved with the smash, and was able to flip himself around and point his legs straight forward in order to crush Tyr with his legs. However, by the time Mars was at a 180 degree angle in the air, Tyr had already moved away, thus causing Mars to land and break his abdomen. (TA)

Mars stood up, upside down letting his arms carry him. Now, flipped over he ran towards Tyr, and before Tyr could react, he pointed his elbows towards his face and… he stood there, in mid-air, directly in front of Tyr’s face. Confusion filled his face as he didn’t know what was going on, and a shocked expression shown on Tyr’s face didn’t necessarily help in this situation. Suddenly, Mars felt something digging into his back, and wrapping around his spine, and Mars was so terrified that he couldn’t move or stop it in any way, and once this thing was entirely around his spine, Mars felt himself being flung backwards and towards the ground.

And then Mars hit the ground, and his whole back along with his ribcage split open as he landed, blood went everywhere, including in his eyes. Though, it was at this moment where he knew he saw something strange. A shadow of a small man. (TA)

Tyr backed roughly 10 feet away from the small man when he slammed Mars into the ground. Tyr didn’t know what to think, the only person he ever knew was Mars, for there to be a third human was just not something Tyr ever thought of. For a moment after slamming Mars the small man stood up and his eyes darted towards Tyr. Tyr felt a wave of terror, something he’s never felt before crossing over his whole body. Not knowing what to do, Tyr then ran towards the small man with all his might, and threw a flurry of punches only to have all of them miss, but this was intended, as many of the punches are supposed to miss, forcing his movement to be entirely unpredictable.

Or so he thought. (TA)

Suddenly, Tyr felt both his arms being grabbed, and his flurry of punches ceased, only for him to be face to face with this small man. And then the small man spoke. His breath stank the air around his face.

“I assume your godliness at least gives you the ability to understand human languages.”

Tyr did indeed understand what he was saying, but it’s not like he could talk back. (TA)

“You savages aren’t what I thought you to be. Guess this means you can only win fair fights.”

Tyr was too shocked to get angry here, but he had to do something about this guy’s fingers digging into his arms. So, he lifted up his leg, and kicked the small man backwards towards a wall, and then used the blood pouring from the holes into his arms as a distraction, and he threw his blood towards the small man.

Upon letting the blood leave his body, he looked to the right, where he could see Mars lying on the ground with hands currently repairing his body. He knew he had to survive until Mars was fully repaired. (TA)

A flood of blood moved towards the small man at breakneck speed, upon seeing it, the small man dashed towards the source, and straight towards Tyr. Tyr saw this coming though, and twisted his body to prepare for an attack. The moment the small man ended up in range, Tyr threw his leg out like a spring and kicked the small man’s chest so hard his leg ended up centimeters from his heart, and then his leg was stuck in the small man’s rib cage.

(TA) Then, the small man grabbed his leg, hugging it tight with both arms, and began to spin Tyr around and around. This lasted for 3 rotations, until Tyr got a hold of one of the hands protruding from Mars, and he slammed Mars’ body against the small man’s head, which allowed him to get his leg free. And then, he tossed Mars to the side and ran towards the small man, fully expecting the small man to gain his bearings and dash behind Tyr, which he expected to spot on. Behind Tyr’s back, the muscles in the small man’s hand cracked as they tightened to the point where his hand was more like a rapier. The small man aimed his hand directly into Tyr’s lungs, and spiked his hand forwards about to stab Tyr. But Tyr suddenly face planted directly into the ground, in order to drag his face across the ground as he turned 180 degrees, and then rose back up and punched the small man directly in the jaw, causing the small man’s tongue to be ejected from his mouth and on to Tyr’s other fist, to which he held his tongue in his hand for a moment, before punching and shoving his hand into the small man’s mouth, and dropping his tongue down his throat. (TA)

Tyr then backed up for a moment to rest. His eyes burned and his arms were sore. He blinked for only a moment when suddenly the small man was nowhere to be seen, and upon turning around neither was Mars. Tyr however, only questioned it for a moment, as he began to feel light headed. Once again he blinked, and this time he was lying on his back. He could see the faint shadow of a person above him before he fell asleep.

“Weak!”, the small man shouted as he was about to land on Tyr’s head.

But then, from his left out of nowhere two feet bashed into his hips. The small man didn’t even get a chance to brace for impact, and his ribcage broke entirely under immense pressure, and then he went flying rightward, smashing into a wall as his right arm and leg were flattened and his flesh turned to paste. On that very wall, which would normally glow a blue color from a regular hit, an explosion happened, and all the lights in the room suddenly went out. (TA)

Lying on the ground next to Tyr, Mars’ broken feet twitched and writhed uncontrollably with pain. He sat up just a little bit to see the small man completely broken, hands beginning to emerge from his mouth. Then, he lied back down and hands emerged from his own mouth.

When he awoke, the small man was celebrating. (TA)

“Yes, Yes! I can’t believe it, it actually happened. These corporate fools don’t know what’s coming for ‘em!” The small man shouted.

Mars just stood there, confused, and as he stood there, he looked to his left to see Tyr also standing there, equally as confused. Then, the small man turned around and saw the two standing there. (TA)

Now, Tyr and Mars got a real good look at the small man. He had to be around six feet tall and skinny to the point he looked malnourished. He had pale white skin. His fingernails were sharp enough to chop raw meat, his hair was in the shape of a man-bun, and his eyes matched the deep red of the other two.

“I’m so sorry for earlier, I had to act hostile in order for my plan to work. My name’s Ares, and those people up above trapped all of us in here, forced us to make energy for their gain. You’ve been here for the last 60 years, instead of fighting each other, how do you two feel about fighting everyone else for a change!?!” (TA)

Mars and Tyr stood there in complete and utter silence.

Ares then walked over to one of the walls, and punched it, breaking his hand in the process. “See, the only thing stopping us from this, are the 80 inch thick steel walls that separate us from the rest of the world. I personally aren’t strong enough to break these walls but someone of your power might just be able to-”

Before he could finish that sentence, Mars walked over to the wall Ares had just attempted to break, and destroyed the entire thing in a single hit. (TA)

The face Ares made was a mix of disbelief and happiness.

“Well that just about sums it up doesn’t it? You two must be so bored of fighting each other all this time.” (TA)

“Mars, Tyr. Please, follow me and together, we’ll destroy the world.”

Day 1 -12:00 AM

Kamapua’a

–

The only chance they had was to walk in one direction, as the room they came from was linked to a hallway, and at the end of that hallway was a massive door that seemed to open when they got close. Through that door, within a long hallway stood a person… no. Through that door stood an animal. A large animal-person that guarded a thick metal door. (TA)

Upon entering the room, Ares immediately seemed to recognize it.

“Kamapua’a,” he called it.

Kamapua’a’s a 17-foot-tall pink colored anthropomorphic pig with a small top hat on the top of his head, and a casual t-shirt and pants. On his sides, he carries two silver-colored revolvers, with the names ``Mom”, and “Dad”, etched into each one. (TA)

Upon every step he takes, his whole-body jiggles and shakes, as if his skeleton is far underneath hundreds of layers of fat. It’s almost to the point where his tiny pig feet shouldn’t be able to carry that much weight.

Kamapua’a spoke without an ounce of fear in his deep, growly pig voice. “You three best turn around this instant.”, he grumbled. His hoof was caressing the handle of his “Mom” gun. “I don’t want to have to kill you three, nor do I want you to kill me. There’s a whole lot of innocent people past this point.”

All three of them stood there, staring at this massive pig. Then Tyr took a step forward, and Kamapua’a pulled out his gun. “You must not know what this thing is. It’s a gun, if I fire it, you’ll die.” Kamapua’a said. “If you don’t want to die, then get back.” (TA)

Tyr took another step forward, and suddenly his head exploded followed by a loud “bang”. As he fell to the ground, human arms began to climb out his neck hole, and Ares rushed forward and to the left faster than Kamapua’a could react. While his attention was pointed towards Ares momentarily, Mars was already in his face, and a sudden blow to Kamapua’a’s side sent him flying to the left towards Ares.

Ares ran behind Kamapua'a and punched him in the back of his skull, however his punch was dampened by his rubbery skin. Kamapua’s whole body shook as the energy went through it, however his bones and nerves were unaffected. (TA)

Kamapua’a turned around and fired his pistol at the moment he saw human skin, but the shot missed and the bullet flew into a curtain on the wall next to the door. Suddenly, a massive hand gripped his whole face, and he felt himself propelling towards the ground at some insane speed. He felt as the skin on the back of his head was ripped away having been made soft by Ares’ attack.

Mars, who’s hand was currently on Kamapua’a’s face, splayed out his other hand and with all his might, punched Kamapua’a’s stomach. Though it didn’t get that far, his hand dug at least an inch deep into his blubber. Now, he picked Kamapua’a up and tossed him towards the ceiling, a hand print dug deep into his face, and a broken fingernail stuck out of his eye.

Ares, who was hanging on the ceiling, pushed off of it with his feet pointing towards Kamapua’a’s spine, but even as he made impact with his body, noticeably his kick had no effect, at least not a visible one. Kamapua’a just fell back down to the ground. Mars had already moved out the way, and both Ares and Mars gathered back close to Tyr, who was just barely about to be fully healed. (TA)

Kamapua’a stood fully up. There was a bruise on his stomach, and a hand exploded out of his mouth, grabbed the fingernail, healed his eye, and went straight back into his mouth, completely disappearing. Kamapua’a then began to speak; “I think you two might realize… the only reason I’m the one who guards you, is because you can’t do enough damage to kill me, and you sure as hell ain’t getting past me.”, he said, “even when that third motherfucker stands up, you ain’t killin me. So you may as well just go back to your container, and call it a day.”

Kamapua’a pointed his gun at Mars’ face, but Mars paid him no mind. He was more focused on Tyr, who was almost fully healed from the initial gunshot. Ares stared at the two, and for a moment, he thought the journey was already over. That was at least until he looked at Mars’ mouth and saw something moving inside. Realizing Mars had a plan, he turned his attention towards Kamapua’a, who seemed afraid to fire his weapon. (TA)

“Now you three hurry up and head back…”, Kamapua’a repeated, but other messages were going on in his head, “What the hell? He isn’t even paying attention to me? I have a gun, I just blasted his friend. He knows what it does to people, and it’s not like he’s invincible towards bullets. I know for a fact he can understand me, but instead he chooses to ignore me… His power is growing, he’s getting ready for an attack. I know this, but I think he knows that I know this. If I shoot him, it’ll give him about half a second to where he’ll be able to launch an attack and I’ll be defenseless.” Kamapua’a thought.

Just as Ares realized what Mars was doing, Mars spat out an object, and it flew towards his hand at some insane speed. Only a fraction of a second passed before Kamapua’a fired his gun. Mars then turned his gaze straight towards the bullet, and tilted his head slightly. The bullet missed his head and instead flew through his afro and out the other side. Mars then tightly gripped the object in his hand, and a cracking sound was produced. Mars then opened up his hand and threw out some sort of dust straight into Kamapua’a’s eyes, blinding Kamapua’a. After which Mars ran towards Kamapua’a and formed his hand into a fist before giving Kamapua’a a right hook punch straight in the nose. He punched Kamapua’a so hard that his eyes popped out of his face and the back of his brain turned to mush as his nose folded into his skull taking up space for his brain to move. (TA)

Kamapua’a then gathered his senses slightly and fired 2 more times at the closest possible point blank range to Mars, but Mars simply moved and twitched his body in such a way that the bullets simply flew past him and into the wall behind him. Mars then switched his stance, and gave Kamapua’a a left hook punch to the right of his skull. The punch caused guts and blood to flood out of Kamapua’a’s left ear and onto the floor, only a single string of brain matter hung out of his ear. Then, because Kamapua’s mouth was open from all the damage, Mars grabbed Kamapua’a’s tongue and ripped it out with all his strength, with it came his esophagus and a piece of his stomach. Then, he folded it all up, crushed it, and stuck it all back into Kamapua’a’s mouth-hole.

Still, despite his injuries being so severe, Kamapua’a’s head flew backwards on his own accord, dodging another attack from Mars. Kamapua’a gained his bearings, flipped his gun around and swung it at Mars’ face, only for Ares to run past the two, holding Kamapua’a’s arm, breaking it. (TA)

After which, Mars reaches to the back of Kamapua’a’s head and pulls it towards his knee, but to avoid this attack Kamapua’a moves his body in such a way to where the attack only hits his fatty skin and not his skull. But, Ares already moved in the direction Kamapua’a moved his skull, and he kicked Kamapua’a, hitting straight bone with his attack and breaking his skull into pieces.

Now, Kamapua’a starts to fall over, and is about to end up flat on the ground before suddenly, Tyr runs right in between the two and uppercuts Kamapua’a with all his strength sending Kamapua’a standing straight back up. After which Tyr throws an attack straight to Kamapua’a’s stomach that doesn’t seem to do much damage, followed by Ares who sharpens his hands and digs into Kamapua’a’s chest, stabbing into his heart, followed by Mars who shoves his fist into the hole dug by Ares and rips out one of Kamapua’a’s ribs before passing it to Tyr, who uses it as a baseball bat, swinging it down below and breaking Kamapua’a’s legs. However, just before Kamapua’a could fully fall down, Mars grips his whole face once again, and Tyr moves behind Kamapua’a and digs into his back, opening up a hole to which Tyr uses to rip out Kamapua’a’s spine for which he just tosses it aside. Then, Mars drops Kamapua’a, his body flopping around like a bowl of Jello. (TA)

The three all look at eachother, and begin walking towards the door adjacent from where they came.

A voice then rang out from behind them, a far different sounding voice from Kamapua’a’s.

“Wait.”, it said. The trio turned themselves around just to see a faceless being made of flesh and fungus who’s taken the form of a woman halfway emerged from Kamapua’a’s corpse’s mouth. On her arms, are grafted two assault rifles covered in a white flesh. Kamapua’a’s corpse then begins to stand back up despite all the broken bones. As it’s standing up, one of the assault rifles misfires, hitting the ground and digging at least 3 inches deep through straight concrete, and a small mushroom grows from out of the hole almost instantly. The moment the corpse fully stands up, she points both assault rifles at the trio, and begins blasting. (TA)

All three gods take immediate evasive maneuvers. Ares starts running on a wall, whilst Mars runs to the right of that thing, and Tyr runs to the left. All three of them circle the creature without a single one of them getting close. Everytime they’re nearly about to be hit by a bullet, they’re able to dodge it and continue on their path. The reason none of them get close is clear; the creature is excreting spores, spores that seem to not move away from around 5 feet from the creature.

As the walls continue to get shot up, more mushrooms continue spawning on them, forcing Ares to run on the ground. (TA)

Suddenly a pig squeal rings out even louder than the bullets, and Kamapua’a’s arms raise up holding both guns in his hands, and with seemingly infinite ammo, Kamapua’a starts shooting his guns in tandem with the creature exploding out his mouth, but Kamapua’a’s shots are all largely aimed at pillars and walls.

While circling the two creatures, Mars is hit by one of the mushroom bullets. It takes off half his finger, and quickly fungus begins invading his body just through his hand. He notices this and rips off his whole arm before the fungus can spread to the whole thing. Immediately upon ripping his arm off, it turns rock solid and the hand turns into a gatling that starts randomly firing mushroom bullets all over the room. (TA) These mushroom bullets stop in midair and turn around homing in towards Mars as they fly around, though they only move in his general direction and are very easy to dodge. Still holding his arm in his other hand, he feels around it for anything that might help and realizes that it’s starting to get both harder and heavier, so he tosses it backwards while it’s still firing and it’s caught by Ares running alongside Tyr. As Ares feels how hard the arm has become he also begins to realize the plan, so he carefully passes it to Tyr, who also feels the arm and understands the plan. Tyr then tosses it directly upwards and it’s once again caught by Mars again. When exactly across from Tyr, Mars swings his arm like a baseball player would throw a baseball, and throws it back to Tyr, passing the creature with incredible speed. At this exact moment, Ares stops momentarily and gets directly in the middle of the two.

Tyr catches the arm on one foot, spins around while still dodging bullets and throws it to Ares who does the exact same thing. They do this four more times, each time the arm flies faster and faster. Eventually the gatling stalls due to the speed it’s reaching. Then, when it’s passed to Mars, Mars throws it straight at the creature, and it hits the creature with enough force to bring down an entire stadium.

As the arm moves through the creature’s body, the spores suddenly condense down into its body and liquify turning into blood which starts healing the creature. However, before it can fully heal, Tyr runs up to it and punches it in a hole which has been made in its chest by the arm. With Tyr’s arm now stuck in the creature’s body, Mars rushes to grab Tyr by his foot, and throws Tyr and the creature towards the door. Tyr then positions his body to have his arm pointed towards that door, and the creature’s body fully explodes creating an imprint on the door. (TA)

For a moment, all three of them stand there as they wait for Kamapua’a to stand back up. As Mars and Tyr begin attempting to open the door, Ares stands next to Kamapua’a’s corpse. “A lot of people are gonna come for us after this.” he whispers.

After a couple minutes of attempting to push this door open, Tyr walks away, and then runs back and kicks the door wide open, breaking his own leg in the process. Light shines throughout the halls as the door opens. A short stairwell followed by a great expansive landscape in the night sky. In the distance, on a hill could be seen a massive church, and above the church a halo made of light floated. (TA)

“That’s where we’re headed”, Ares said, “The place we’re in right now isn’t our homeworld. It’s a pocket dimension meant to hold the most dangerous criminals and the batteries in contempt. It’s a power-generating-prison, and the warden is an extremely powerful God of Eternity; Jesus Christ.”

Day 1 - 12:10 A.M

(TA)

Priest Washington

“As I opened up the door fully expecting him, my friend to be standing there bloody and battered. I never expected to see what I did. A pile of flesh and fungus. I thought I had prepared myself for this possibility, but it was clear I did not.”

A person had entered the room through a back entrance the trio didn’t know about. He was a black man in priest’ robes. Instead of eyes, there was simply a triangular shaped, orange glowing hole in the middle of his face.

Immediately upon entering the room, he let out a blood-curdling scream, and though it could be heard all throughout the hallways of that place, Ares, Mars, and Tyr were long gone by now. Slowly, he walked towards Kamapua’a’s corpse, gritting his teeth, and holding back puke the whole way. Immediately upon reaching him, he dropped down to his knees, got blood all over his robes, and attempted to pick up the flesh. Flesh which melted in his hands. (TA)

He clenched his fists to the point his hands began to bleed. Immediately upon drawing blood, he got a terrible feeling in his stomach and turned around to throw up next to Kamapua’a’s corpse.

Not caring about his own sanitary needs, he knelt his head in his own digest. Many tears flowed from his eyes and diluted with the yellowish-brown substance. In a sickly, whiny voice he whispered to himself something.

“Zeus.” he said quietly, “War, Zeus, Thanatos, I’ll ki-”. His speech completely paused as he could feel another wave of puke. And once again, he threw up while staring at his wobbling reflection in his own filth.

After puking his guts out, Washington just sat there for a moment, staring at the bloody, smelly, sticky ground. He gasped for air and coughed as he waited for a second round. His heart beat like a drum the whole time. His veins began to bulge and he could feel blood pumping quickly into his hands.

Suddenly, he heard a voice from behind him.

“You want to kill them… don’t you?” the voice rang out. (TA)

Washington snatched the ‘’Dad” gun off Kamapua’a’s corpse and swung around 180 degrees. But when he turned around, he saw nothing. Yet the voice rang out again.

“Am I wrong? You want them dead. The ones who did this to your dear friend. Or were you just his bodyguard?”

(TA)

In pure rage, Washington bit the side of his own tongue. “Who the hell are you!?!” He yelled. And the voice rang out again, though, now it sounded like a thousand individual voices all in sync with each other.

“Depends on your answer.”, the voice said.

“No it depends on yours”, Washington replied, “I’m a priest with a gun! If I just start shooting, something is bound to hit you!”

The voice paused for a moment, barely long enough for Washington to think it was fully gone. But then it spoke again.

“That’s true. I’m Justice.” The voice rasped. (TA)

Washington gasped with fear upon hearing this. For a moment, he wondered if he should run, but instead he stood his ground. Before he spoke, he lowered his gun. “It would be useless to shoot you, wouldn’t it?”, he asked Justice.

“If I wanted you dead, you’d already be dead. But it seems like you got quite the clean slate.” Justice told Washington, “You know who I am, which means you must know what the deal is. I assume you want War dead, gone from this world.” (TA)

Blood excreted out of Washington’s mouth. His muscles stopped being so tense, and his heart beat steadily. Washington was on edge, but he wasn’t panicking anymore. “Of course”, he said, “But tell me why you should be involved?”

Justice let out a long sigh, “Simple. You’re weak.” (TA) Washington gritted his teeth a little bit. He knew that would be Justice’s answer but he still didn’t like hearing it. Justice continued, “Of course, that’s not the whole truth, but it’s enough of the truth to justify us working together.”

—-

Supposedly, Washington is the strongest in an organization called The Twelve Priests, but he doesn’t even hold a candle when compared to some of the medium-level transmutants or gods. Throughout his whole life he’s been bruised and battered with the sole intention of getting stronger but none of that matters when faced with an impossible task.

The other priests followed Kamapua'a most of the time, always they were by his side waiting to follow his command. Especially during the times where their boss was on Earth. They would give their lives for Kamapua’a’s life even if it meant defying their boss.

Likely, by now, all the other priests are dead. (TA)

Washington might be the final priest. He’ll uphold the wishes of the others, and the wishes of Kamapua’a.

—-

There was still something Washington wanted to know. “I don’t just want war dead.” Washington said, “Zeus, Thanatos, The Emperors of Hell, Chronos, Depression and Anxiety, The “God of Gods”… they’re more guilty than War. What will we do about them?”

For a moment, Justice was silent as it pondered the subject. “I can sense that the balance of power is shaking as we speak. The release of war has sent the world into a panic. Humans, Gods, Transmutants, but you priests fall into a weak inbetween. Despite the sides that have been set up, you’re talking about a full sweep?” Justice asked.

“Of course.” Washington replied. (TA)

Once again, Justice was silent. This silence however, lasted for far longer than before. Though, just as Washington was about to turn around and leave, he heard a quiet chuckle. And for Washington, everything went black.

When he awoke, he was leaning on a tree in a field of grass. His arms were bandaged and bruised, and the top half of his vision was covered by a hat. In his mouth there was a cigar, and on his feet were black cowboy boots. He felt something weighing heavily down on his arms and back, and something was poking the ground as he swayed with a slight breeze. As he observed this, he also discovered that he couldn’t control his movements though he could feel his surroundings. He tried to yell but no sound was made, he tried to step forward but his foot didn’t move. Then, he heard a voice… it was his own voice.

“You’re awake,” he said, “Usually people don’t stay asleep for that long. Means we actually have potential together.” (TA)

As he tried to decipher who was talking he began to panic. He felt like he needed to puke again and even had that feeling, but nothing came out. Once again, he spoke.

“Oh yeah, I should mention, you’ll be able to control your body soon, but it seems like it would be a bad idea to let you move right now… rightfully.”. Without Washington’s control, he turned towards the other side of the tree and looked out further onto the field, and he saw Ares, Mars, and Tyr out there, all of them covered in deep-red colored blood. 3 trucks with mounted cannons and guns on top of them were driving towards the trio. The people driving the trucks were priests.

On instinct, Washington attempted to run towards and help the priests, but no movement was made. Once again he spoke, “We can’t interfere, otherwise I won’t be able to beat them. We’ll stay back for now. We’ll let them pass down Justice for us. I’ll crush them in the final hour. Then, we’ll crush everyone else. We’ll reach your goal that way.” (TA)

And that was the moment Washington realized his body wasn’t his own anymore. He had made a deal with Justice. He had become ‘Justice Washington’.

And there was nothing he could do except let the other priests die.

Day 1 - 2:30 A.M

TO BE CONTINUED IN CHAPTER 4: Priest Adams

*Planned quote from chapter 4*

“May the good lord of all that is great, guide this cannonball up thine ass!”

-Thanks for reading this, it’ll be a little bit before I release the entire rest of Part 1 of 3. School and Work have been heavily slowing down production. Also, once again I recognize I’m a beginner so please, please give me critical feedback so that I can improve my writing as I continue on. I hoped you liked it. Also I wanna start adding pictures to it as I slowly learn how to draw. Obviously just cover or in between chapter stuff I could add.

(Final notes)

Sorry about the puke bit, don’t worry I won’t write anything like that ever again. I like writing gross, gorey shit, but that may have been too much.

As a future note, I’m not trying to offend anyone, and though I personally am not religious, I have been doing extensive research to avoid being offensive when important religious figures get shown off. I want to do justice to anyone's culture that this story involves. Once again, I’m not religious, but I’m very interested in religion and mythology. And because of that I’ll list the characters at the end of each google doc I write this on and how loosely or accurately they’re based off the original character from what I’ve read.

Ares (Greek God of War) Only accurate by name.

Mars (Roman God of War) Only accurate by name.

Tyr (Norse God of War) Only accurate by name.

Kamapua’a (Hawaiian God of Fertility) lots of websites describe him as a Pig-Person creature. There was no exact description of what he looked like, so I just thought of a basic anthropomorphic pig. Other than that he doesn’t have anything else accurate. Though, I recommend looking at his story, because it’s actually pretty interesting and I don’t feel like Hawaiian mythology gets shown off enough in the media. People seem to mostly focus on either mythologies from Europe, Egypt, or Native American mythologies. Though Kamapua’a gets slaughtered here (which will become a pattern with interesting gods) I think his story deserves so much more recognition then it currently has. Also, if you’re someone who believes this, good on you! You have among one of the most interesting mythologies to read about and I genuinely went through a week of just being interested in gods from your religion. Unfortunately, there ain’t no more deities from it going further though. I kinda wanted to add Kuula but there’s something else that fits the section a bit better.

Kamapua’a Second Phase. That whole bit is supposed to be a shout to a very minor character in a story I wanna write in the future. That’s the only reason I added it so that I can look back and justify enjoying my old (Currently current) content.

Priest Washington. Not based on anything… but his name is a reference.

Justice. His design is supposed to be based on “Justice” from “Afro Samurai”. He isn’t a god from any culture, just a god from my imagination. It’s not me trying to copy, it’s just a reference because I absolutely love Afro Samurai. (You’ll find a whole lotta references as this goes on. It’s just me giving props to the media I like. But from here on I’ll stop pointing them out)

I’ll talk about Jesus Christ at the end of the next block of chapters. He’s only been named so far. I know for a fact I’m treading a thin line with that character, so I’ve done way, way too much research on him and I’ll do more as I write his character.

And for the people that might care. No. The story does not become preachy. Every character from here on out should be considered an antagonist. That’s all I’ll say on the matter without giving any spoilers.

Thank you for reading

-Tytzin

1 note · View note

hiddles-and-skittles · 2 years

Text

News Flash

Pairing: News Anchor!Bucky x Reader

Word Count: 2,161

Summary: Blowjob under a desk? Classic.

Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI, IF YOU DON’T HAVE YOUR AGE IN YOUR PROFILE DESCRIPTION I WILL BLOCK YOU, smut/oral (m rec), a little angst but it's fluffy, mentions of cheating (no actual cheating), the nickname ‘pumpkin,’ reader being a little insecure, also Sharon is a biatch trying to steal yo man, please tell me if there's any more!

Notes: Aaaaaand we’re back! This might not be the most original idea, but I've had this photo saved since the start of my Seb obsession last year, and all I see is newsanchor!Bucky. Not sure if that's an AU that's been done, but it's something I wanted to try. I don't have my own and I've been dying for something new!

***PLEASE READ Something I’ve noticed a lot when I copy from Word and paste into Tumblr; my paragraphs paste out of order? If something doesn’t make sense, let me know. It always looks different on my laptop vs my phone. I’m a perfectionist so I make sure fifty or so times everything’s good on my end, but tumblr doesn’t agree sometimes. In my last fic the banter was out of order and wedged between paragraphs and it didn’t make sense. The ending paragraph was also at the beginning. So I’m begging you to tell me if something doesn’t make sense. Thank you <3

You might have stolen your boyfriend's spare key to the broadcasting station he works at a few nights ago while he was fast asleep, slithering out of bed and tiptoeing around him in hopes he wouldn't wake up. Or 'maybe you lost it in your car somewhere,' you told him, giggling when he couldn't find it. It took three days to hatch this nefarious plan and now it was finally time to execute it.

You made sure to get to the station early; before anyone else could spot you and before the cameras turned on. The lights from several TVs and other equipment were the only things visible in the dark, so your phone light guided you to where the anchors' desk was. This was one of the wildest plans you'd ever concocted, and the thrill of getting caught turned you on that much more. Hell, this is illegal. You might get Bucky fired if you're not careful enough.

But you're sneaky. You know the setup.

The underside of the desk was a deep enough hole to hide your full body and then some, so you push yourself underneath and scoot backwards until your back hits the front panel. You have enough room to stretch your legs all the way out and still not be seen, and if you didn't know better you'd think these desks were built for times like these.

You slide his chair in front of you before returning to situate yourself and read on your phone to pass the time. About thirty minutes and a broken neck later, lights flicker on, the smell of coffee hits your nose, and a whole slew of people briskly walk in with only their bottom halves visible. Immediately you sit up and make sure your phone is on silent, moving out of the way of the chair when he pulls it out to sit his cute little ass down.

You're giddy as a school girl ready to jump his bones but you tear yourself away from misbehaving, knowing the build up would be far more satisfying. He clears his throat to rehearse his intro but cuts himself off to fake laugh at what his co-anchor Sharon says, causing you to roll your eyes knowing damn well you're funnier than she is. You get lost in his raspy, early morning voice, the one that always oozes sex and makes you gush without him ever having to touch you, and moments later Sharon says the routine good morning. He follows her.

"Coming up: A fire wreaks havoc in the city but an unexpected hero saves the day. And are these the warmest temperatures ever recorded for a New York's winter? Stay tuned." The camera cuts and the next spot is cast to a reporter who stands in the street in slacks and a t-shirt. Bucky leans back in his chair and adjusts his tie then takes a sip of water, oblivious that you're under his desk.

He and his co-anchor chit chat and you decide to test the waters by tugging ever so slightly on his shoe laces, but when you get no reaction you pull on the bottom of his pants. His knee immediately jerks up and hits the desk and he mutters a pained ‘shit’ under his breath upon impact. She asks if he's okay and he says something about not quite being awake yet, so she volunteers to get more coffee for him. The second she leaves his chair rolls back and your heart pounds violently in your chest. Curious steel blue eyes widen in shock when he notices your seated form, causing him to nearly topple backwards but saving himself when his coworkers turn their heads to the commotion.

"What are you doing here?!" He whisper-screams, trying not to get anyone's attention. A wicked grin appears on your face as you gaze up at him but before you could even think of a response, Sharon brings the coffee to him and he quickly rolls himself back to the desk. His leg stretches out and his foot lands on your chest, softly pushing you back from the potential line of sight.

They resume talking and the spotlight is brought back to them as they pick up their stories for the morning. You crawl back towards him on your knees and rest your hands on his boots. His entire lower half is completely at your mercy and you'd be fucking stupid not to seize the moment.

Sharon laughs and coos at a video in the background. “In case you missed it, late last night at the Central Park Zoo a baby red panda was born! They named him Roscoe! Isn't he just adorable?” She playfully elbows Bucky in the arm, but seems offended when he doesn’t respond with equal enthusiasm. “Ahem, I said, isn't he adorable, Buck?”

Running your deft fingers under his pants and up his legs, you rake your nails through the hairs that adorn them. His breath hitches at your touch. You continue outside of his dress pants, kneading up his toned calves and sliding over his knees, wandering slowly over the insides of his thighs until he adjusts himself by opening his legs for better access. He then clears his throat to try and focus on his story. One of his gloved hands disappears from the cameras' view and grips onto his chair beside him and he taps his foot as a warning, one you pay no mind to.

You rim your fingers along where his shirt is tucked in and tug him closer by his empty belt loops. You force his legs apart wider and pop his pants button open, leisurely dragging the zipper down and licking your lips when he sucks his stomach in.

You hook a finger in his boxers and pull down, springing out his semi-hard cock, then kiss the inside of his thigh, watching his cock twitch. Grinning like a Cheshire, you huff out a warm breath to tease him, his thighs flexing at the sensation.

Before you proceed you double check to make sure you've got enough headspace below the desk that you don't accidentally knock yourself out giving your boyfriend a secret blowjob.

You wrap your hand around his length and pump until precum starts to drip from the head. What I'd give to ride him in front of all these people, all these cameras, you think to yourself, lifting up to lap at him. The hand gripping the chair moves to your wrist, begging you with a gentle squeeze. You repay the light squeeze on his cock and immediately hear him gasp. You just know how red his face must be as you hear Sharon ask if he's okay, and he responds with a squeaky 'just fine!' You laugh in your head, returning to lick up the thick vein on the underside of his cock. Though it’s impossible to gauge his reaction, his faint, delicious whimpers make up for it as you take more of him in your mouth.

“Uh yeah, Rascal's cute,” he grits out with a fake smile, shifting to sink a little lower in his chair.

“It's Roscoe,” she corrects him stiffly.

“Of course it is.” You see Sharon on the tv behind them shooting him a death glare, cocking her eyebrow in confusion. She straightens her papers and rolls her eyes away from the camera with a smile still plastered to her face. Your hand slides down to roll his balls between your fingers and you kitten lick the slit of his head. "B-back to Steve with the-ah-weather!" He chokes out, shooting straight up in his chair.

As soon as the cameras pan, he's biting down on a gloved hand to stifle a moan while the other is white knuckling the desk right above your head. You can't help but hum in satisfaction, the small vibration causing his hips to jolt forward and the tip of his cock to hit the back of your throat. You gag at the abrupt intrusion but begin to relax your jaw, taking in all you can and pumping your hand around what your mouth leaves out.

“What is going on with you?!” Sharon hisses at him. You take him out of your mouth and listen.

“J-just havin’ an off day,” he lies breathlessly, his eyes glossed over.

“Well I’m worried,” she whispers, standing up and bending over enough for her lips to brush the shell of his ear. “You know you can talk to me.” She kisses his cheek and rests a hand on his thigh far too high up for your liking, then reaches her other hand up to thumb his chin dimple. You see red. As she walks away you can see that Bucky is uncomfortable and right now it isn’t from his compromising position.

You angrily go back to him and hollow out your cheeks, closing your mouth tighter around him with your teeth encased in your lips, sucking harder as your head bobs faster. The clicking of joints is heard as his toes curl in his shoes, a clear indication he’s nearing his release. Your focus shifts completely to getting Bucky off. His legs shake and his hips jerk of their own volition in a silent plea to keep going, but you know the best way to drive him crazy is to slow down to the point he thinks he won’t finish. You slowly twist your hand up and down his shaft while sucking his balls into your mouth and his hips stutter twice more, his cock aimed towards your open mouth, eager to collect his release on your tongue. He grunts out a final time as his cum shoots into your mouth, and you smile in victory as you swallow every drop.

From this angle you see him relax, his breathing shallow as he finds your cheek and gently runs a gloved thumb over it. You nuzzle into his palm and quickly reach to stuff him back into his pants, but your mind is brought back to the way Sharon touched him and you try not to grip him in frustration. He intentionally drops a pen and jumps down from his chair.

“How are you getting out of here?” he asks you, grabbing his pen. Your brain can’t even form a response with how upset you are. Is he cheating? Or is she just a bitch? “...pumpkin?”

“Fire alarm,” you snap, not meeting his eyes. He looks dejected with his brows furrowed and eyes searching yours, but he shakes himself out of it.

“Got it,” he nods. He makes a quick adjustment to his pants and stands up, tucking his shirt back in and excusing himself to the bathroom. You finally sit down on your ass and relax your legs, but the thought of Sharon and Bucky together gets so deep under your skin it brings tears to your eyes. The obnoxious sound of the fire alarm pulls you from your anxious addled brain and you harshly wipe at the falling wetness from your cheeks. The office lights flash and the news crew panic and gather their things, but you stay under the desk until the entire room is emptied out.

The door flies open to reveal a freshly disheveled Bucky, who practically leaps over to you and reaches his hand under the desk for you to take. You refuse his offer and get yourself up. “Let’s go,” you tell him, brushing yourself off. Once outside you’re met with the crisp morning air and the sun rising enough to cast a hazy orange reflection on the building’s windows. He takes you to a spot that’s hidden from his coworkers.

“You're gonna pay for that later," he laughs as he tries to pull you close but you shrug him off and fold your arms over your chest.

“Good,” you sniffle, leaning into him.

"What's the deal with Sharon?” you blurt. “Do you...like her or something?" You finally look him in the eyes and he notices how red your face is, your eyes brimming with tears. His mouth hangs open and he fights the urge to hug you as tight as humanly possible.

"What? No, I swear, I've told her I'm not interested, she already knows I'm with you. It makes me uncomfortable, but she just won't stop.” His hands rest on your hips. “I would never even consider it, pumpkin, especially not with how good your lips feel around my cock." He blushes and smiles shyly as he whispers the dirty word, his eyes following yours to look at you earnestly. "Never." You stutter out a sigh and blink away your tears and he tugs you closer, wrapping his arms around you and kissing your temple.

“You know I love you. She can never make me feel the way you do.” He kisses down your face and you snort, smirking up at him.

“I know she can’t. You just wait till you get home tonight.”

@loricamebackyetagain @jobean12-blog

#bucky x reader #news anchor!bucky x reader #news anchor bucky #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky x reader smut #bucky x reader fluff #bucky x reader angst #fluff #smut #marvel fanfic #marvel faniction #my writing #mcu #my fic #I love Bucky #bucky barnes fluff #james bucky barnes

322 notes · View notes

peanutpmingib · 3 years

Text

boyfriend!changmin headcanons

now introducing ur college boyfie changmin !

watch it : gender neutral reader, pure fluff rly, not much else. let me know if i missed anything !

word count : 600+

——-

- dance major for sure

-Oh he’d be the sweetest :((

-Even before he gets involved with any feelings he’s so so nice

-Meets you through mutual friends, friends of friends of friends and the like, and eventually you join each others circles

-And soon enough earn the title of best friends

-constantly blowing up ur phone, but he doesn’t mean too ! He swears !

-Brain works in bursts so he ends up sending possible hang out ides as a string of texts, no paragraphs with him

-Unless it’s serious and he has to actually think about it

-Like when he finally gets the balls to confess to you

-It’s a huggeeee paragraph he’s been typing, deleting, and retyping in his notes for days

-He can’t do it in person, no matter how much sangyeon rolls his eyes and pushes for him to meet you in person, he’d rather die

-So on a random like Tuesday night, at 7:10 he texts u like, hey do u have a sec?

-And u reply a few mins later, yeah what’s up ?

-Copy’s and pastes, sends it without leaving much room for though and screams

-Basically the paragraph goes “um you're really important to me and I’ve been thinking about just our whole dynamic. I rly love being your best friend, you’ve given me some of the most precious moments of my life, but I think I’d be a better boyfriend if you’d let me, friends just doesn’t do a justice to what I feel for you anymore “

-You read it, he sees the bright check under the word vomit of his feelings

-10 minutes of radio silence and he’s sure he’s just made the biggest mistake of his life

-You're actually on your way to his dorm, hastily picked flowers from the campus garden tucked into your arm so not to catch attention, blush covering your cheeks

-You talk and talk and talk, but not before you confess yourself, you feel the same and he’s over the moon, hands shaking when he asks if he can kiss you, and it’s just a mere peck

-He’s so cute

-All about acts of service and touch

-Wants to hold your hand, open the door for you, do the laundry, dust the house. Wants to show you he cares by taking care of things for you

-Takes you everywhere, favorite hang out spots soon turn to favorite date spots

-You practically live in his dorm at his point, half your clothes permanently live there, and you can bet there’s a 70% chance that if your not where you need to be your laying on his bed taking a nap

-His bed is actually hand made by some ancient sleeping good, you swear

-likes to take things easy and make you laugh

-He’ll tease you occasionally but if you tease him back he’s sooo shy about it and will whine about how unfair and mean you are ( he secretly likes it’s tho)

-Wants all the cute couple jewelry, matching pfp pics, matching bios, all of it he thinks it’s so cute

-Wants the whole world to know how lucky he is to have you, his love is just too big not to share

-supports u in every little thing u do

-will come to every last event u have with flowers and chocolate

-He’s sometimes an evil little shit, especially during Halloween holy hell

-Will trap u in a bear hug while he forces u to watch horror movies with him

-Drags u to haunted houses, makes u do couple consumed with him

-Did I mention He’s so cute bc he rly rly rly is

-as cute and carefree he seems most of the time, he can be a pretty serious dude so make sure to take him seriously!

-treat him well !

#tbz x reader #tbz headcanons #the boyz #the boyz imagines #the boyz x gender neutral reader #changmin fluff #ji changmin #ji changmin x reader #tbz fluff #tbz fic #tbz #kpop imagines #changmin

115 notes · View notes

autisticlancemcclain · 2 years

Note

And not in the game but how can you bring yourself to write so much? I keep trying to write but I keep getting stuck.

13 from this ask game — Have you ever received hate on a fic?

no, thankfully!! nothing yet. but i’m always afraid i’m gonna get shit for autistic lance or tall keith or whatever since i see so much hate for them 😭😭 i hope i’m spared.

as for how i manage to find the time/motivation to write so much — there’s a short answer and a long one. short answer is i cater entirely to myself and i set small deadlines to trick my brain.

long answer: okay, so i’ve been in the voltron fandom since 2016 (altho i was 14 at the time lol). so i’ve had a lot of time to think and read and look at art and generally, i had a lot of half-formed fics, ideas, headcanons, and all sorts of things flicking through my brain.

one day, i saw this lil nas tweet that planted a fic so vividly in my brain that i just… wrote. just spat the words out on the document, wrote. and i liked it! i really did. so i posted it.

after that i realised i could just… write shit down. it didn’t have to be finished, it didn’t even have to have a start! the smidges of dialogue, the fragmented pieces of fics, the longer headcanons, whatever. i could just write things down. i kept them all in one big note, and they looked a little like this (photo ids at the end of the post):

you might recognize some of my really early fic fragments! that’s because i also realised, eventually, that i could also post these! it’s free content, yknow? no room for complaints. i could just post, and i could also write whatever the hell i wanted. i liked autistic lance? i wrote him. i liked soft keith? i wrote him. i like hunk & lance’s friendship? i wrote it, and i lot of it. i wrote what i wanted to read!

at this point (i think mid-march) i had several dozen of these fic fragments stacked up. so i asked if anyone would be interested in me posting them, and i got a pretty decent response, so i started just copy-pasting, every day. just the things u already had. they did pretty decently, too, averaged about 30 notes each.

i actually got pretty attached to the notes. i’ve always thrived on external validation, so when i started to get it regularly i became a smidge attached to it, so i started feeling a little stressed about posting, yknow? i started feeling like i had to get things out every day. and then i ran out of pre-written fics to post, and i panicked. i didn’t think i would be able to come up with fics on the fly, and i was way too stressed about posting every day to even think about not doing that.

but here’s the thing… i did. come up with things on the fly, i mean. it turned out that because i was literally writing all the time, whatever came to mind, that i started building up the skills! suddenly i was able to think of ideas easily, and it was easier and easier for me to come up with whole paragraphs and full dialogues, not just pieces.

and the daily posting ended up helping me, too. i stopped putting so many damn rules on myself. the only rule i had for myself was ‘post before midnight, if you can’. i wrote whatever the hell i wanted, however long or short i wanted, however silly i wanted. just whatever. and i reminded myself that i was writing this for fun. and i really started to find joy with what i was doing.

after that, it got easier. i love what i’m doing, i’ve made some awesome friends, and when i need to take a break i take one.

so my advice is: find joy in your art. remind yourself that you’re writing for yourself. take the pressure off. everything get easier :)

(also, hey, i’ve seen your stuff!! i really like your art and have laughed at several of your posts — that sam/samurai one in particular. you’re doing great!)

[Photo I.D.: nine screenshots of different works of mine from my apple notes app. they read as follows:

first screenshot: ‘fic idea lance n keith invite everyone to some weird dress up party at halloween. it’s their wedding’

second screenshot: ‘i want femme fatale BOM lance on a secret mission literally more than i want to breathe. “oh, i live with my grandparents. i don’t have parents.” “you don’t..have…parents?” “yeah.” lance said offhandedly. “my dad abandoned me and my mom blamed me for it, so i ran away when i was seven. luckily my abuela and grand-père found me and decided to take me in,” he explained, smiling softly. his eyes never left his work, seemingly unconcentrated with the conversation - he missed the looks of horror exchanged around him.’

third: screenshot of a tweet with the caption: “I know my boss sick of me”, and then a screenshot of a text conversation: (grey bubble) “Did you call a customer dumb tonight?” (blue bubble) “No” (blue bubble) “I said ‘are you dumb’?” (blue bubble) “I was asking him” (grey bubble) “Do you think that was appropriate?” (blue bubble) “Very much so”. And then text I wrote saying “shiro to keith when he does this to a planets leader”

fourth: ‘princess buttercup - lance, westley - keith, montoya - shiro, fezzir - hunk, kid - pidge, grandpa - matt, verusi - iverson, montoya’s father - adam, old wizard guy - allura, old wizard guy’s wife - coran, humperdinck - lotor, creepy henchman of humperdinck - sendak. notes: lance solves some of the problems bc buttercup is too much of a damsel, shiro is fighting to avenge adam, allura and coran are not married obviously, lance shoots the ROOS’

fifth: ‘they all giggled, and lance snapped. “Los pendejos monolingües no tienen el privilegio de que yo traduzca todos mis pensamientos para su conveniencia. ustedes pueden jugar el papel de idiotas, por una vez. vete a la mierda.” he stormed off. klance fic where they’ve passed rivals, they’re friends, and they’re in love, but keith doesn’t know, but lance does, so lance waits patiently for keith to realize, and then he smiles softly when keith figures it out, and keith’s like “h-how, what?” and lance laughs softly and is like “you’ve been in love with me as long as i’ve loved you, baby. it just took you a little while to find out” and they live sappily ever after’

sixth: ‘we find out lance is a soccer star cus he drop kicks a bomb safely away’

seventh: ‘him?” Keith flushed, but nodded his head. Shiro smiled. “Then what does it matter if you’re gay? You like Lance. Liking him doesn’t make you any less gay. Don’t force yourself to ignore your feelings because you’ve been convinced your identity belongs to a few letters. People are complicated, Keith. We don’t have to fit into neatly labelled boxes.” au where everything is the same except lance is short as shit and also like. absolutely stacked fic where lances dad is killed and he was half raised by his oldest brother (22 yrs his senior) and he lowkey gives shiro a pep talk after shiro and keith fight because he gets the whole half brother half dad thing’

eighth: ‘i want to see a fic exploring the fact that it’s canon that shiro was a lot like lance when he was younger. i want to see lance and shiro interacting after shiro comes back to life and they’re basically The Same Person and it freaks everyone out to see them side by side. just like a problem arises and they say the same thing at the same time and side eye each other i think it could be so funny while also being so so sad. : Hunk shook his head. “It’s insane. Honestly, the main difference between them is their taste in men,” he said. Shiro raised his eyebrows. “Really?” Hunk scoffed. “You seem to go for the respectable choice of tall, sweet-sassy nerd. Lance, on the other hand -“ he gives Lance a pointed look, Lance bites back a sheepish grin. This is clearly a’

ninth: ‘explained, mischievous. “It was fun whether or not they realized they were being clowned, but watching them slowly come to find that they were schooled was certainly entertaining.” i just want to team to realise that lance clowns them constantly by playing dumb. paladins are doing the mind meld for ‘something u can’t believe you got away with’. lance projects the memory of meeting his stepmom for the first time: Lance looked at her critically. “Did your mother have, like, a ridiculously long labour, or something?” He asked her. She looked at him strangely. “Uh… what?” “I’m just trying to imagine how much pain your mother must have been in to look at her newborn baby daughter in the eyes, holding her carefully, and go ‘Ah, yes.’

All photos include a black background with white text. End I.D.]

#ask game #this is. so fucking long omg i’m sorry #longpost #writing #writing advice

18 notes · View notes

mittensmorgul · 3 years

Text

For anyone interested in long-term residence in the supernatural fandom, please have some observations I’ve made over the decade I’ve been here. Take it or leave it as you will, but I’ve found all of this info useful over the years I’ve been here.

I wrote this yesterday, and it achieved its mission of identifying the sort of folks who would react negatively to it (i.e. a lot of block lists have been updated), so now that it’s been edited for content, it’s going under a cut (because that is how we do things on tumblr in general, unless we have a deliberate purpose for annoying readers with excessively long text posts) for the sake of people who actually do care about the fandom and its history. If that’s not you or your reason for being here, then keep on keeping on with your own thing, I guess. For those who are interested, there’s a lot of fandom resources some of us have been building for years that you might enjoy knowing about.

First off, I’ve been informed by a few friends who’ve read through this for coherency’s sake that it sort of reads like a *shakes cane from porch* fandom grandma complaint, but honestly... I earned this rocking chair and goshdangit imma rock now. So apologies for any “back in my day” vibes or faint aroma of tiger balm this post might give off. Then again, it’s loosely based on a similar post from 2012 so like... time is a flat circle anyway I guess.

1. There is no such thing as “tumblr famous,” unless you’re referring to the hilarious and delightful fic of the same name (please go read it, you will cackle). Posting Hot Takes for imaginary Clout™ on this site is kind of pointless in the long run. Sure you can post solely for the sake of stirring shit and getting notes, but the majority of the folks who do aren’t long term residents of the fandom. They’re just tourists moving through our little beach town for spring break. If you’re actually intent on moving to this corner of the fandom for an extended stay, please bother to really feel out the permanent residents and understand the culture and general mood of the neighborhood. It bears no resemblance to whatever’s going on across town where all the bars and beach parities are happening, and those loud, drunken revelers are, again, gonna disappear back to their regular lives or on to the next party eventually. That doesn’t mean the fandom is dying, it’s just evolving.

(funny how I had several comments implying that I’m just trying to keep the fandom from evolving with this post, because I sincerely do want the fandom to continue on for years to come, and that is impossible without evolution. We can evolve without self-immolating, though. mostly i included point 1 for an excuse to push ancient but hilarious fanfic on you.)

2. Once you post something here, it’s been unleashed to the fandom winds. You never know where it will end up, or who will comment on it or add to it. Remember that time Misha tweeted the link to the Epic Cockles Love Story post? No? It was wild. That was 2012. They all know we’re here, and how to find us if they want to. Please don’t take it to their doorsteps.

Obviously if someone is being a dick on your posts, please feel free to block them, but the whole entire point of this site is to engage people with your posts. Being big mad that someone reblogged your post with comments or supporting evidence, or happy headcanons or “HECK THIS IS GREAT BECAUSE (insert personal story about their experience or whatever else made them Feel Things about your post)” is frankly ridiculous. If your goal is to avoid any sort of engagement with your posts, then maybe try instagram instead. From what I understand, there is a SPN fandom presence there, and nobody can tarnish your original posts with unwanted commentary. But the ability to reblog with additional commentary is a FEATURE of tumblr that builds community through conversation. Otherwise we’re all just talking to ourselves in a vacuum, and that’s what actually kills fandoms.

(and for the folks who just want to blog how they want to blog and don’t want people to engage on their posts at all, please feel free to block anyone you want, as well... nobody wants to step on your toes, but most of us also don’t want to walk on eggshells wondering if this post is one of the “do not add comments for any reason” sorts of posts, either. This is a huge fandom and most people can’t even begin to keep track of every creator and their url du jour, and what their personal rules might be regarding interaction with their content. Including a “please don’t add comments” note at the bottom of your posts-- and not in your tags that won’t even show up on reblogs, but in the actual body of the post-- would sincerely help avoid any awkward or unwanted interactions, too. At the end of the day, you are in control of your own fandom experience and the block button exists.

For the record, I block zero fandom blogs (which is why I posted this, I wanted it to reach a wide scope... refer to the opening paragraphs as to why).

3. Since this post was partly inspired by a tag I left on that post going around about how “previous tags” mean fuckall on this site (which you can read here), just a reminder that if you like someone’s tags or feel they add value to the post, part of the Peer Review structure of tumblr encourages you to PASTE THEM INTO A REBLOG. If you do this, then at least credit the person who actually wrote the tags! Don’t just copy someone else’s tags into your tags on your reblog of the post without credit either. They were not YOUR tags. (I have had this happen to tag rambles I wrote and someone else got credited with them on a subsequent reblog and it is FRUSTRATING). Just... don’t even bother to write “previous tags” because WHAT PREVIOUS TAGS?! Nobody is gonna bother to chase back the chain of reblogs trying to find where the mystery tags came from, friendos. That way lies madness.

(for the record, since some folks seemed to focus on this point solely, writing “previous tags” on a post isn’t inherently a BAD thing, but for anyone who actually is here for more than one-off shitposting, then it’s sort of a pointless thing in the long run. This wasn’t intended to suggest people who ARE here for one-off shitposting are bad or “doing it wrong,” but for people who might actually want to preserve that hilarious joke or insightful comment. People delete posts and entire blogs all the time around here. Links break. I get that the upcoming generation just shrugs at that and moves on with their lives, but heck... you don’t have to accept that all entertainment is disposable if you don’t want to. There’s a bizarre sort of nihilism plaguing us all about the impermanence of pretty much everything that feels like something we should be fighting against rather than buying into wholesale, even in our escapist entertainment. I’m just exhausted by the complete loss of joy in community.

*shouts from the peanut gallery* IT AIN’T THAT DEEP, JUST GET SOME FRESH AIR AND LOOK AT A PUPPY OR SOMETHING

Yes... yes it isn’t really that deep, but bigger picture in the state of reality we’re all entirely disillusioned with, are we supposed to just give up on everything, including the things we cling to because they bring us a tiny spark of hope that we’re not all just trapped in this dystopian nightmare and things might actually be worth living for?

*peanut gallery clinging to burnt husks of peanuts in a barren peanut field* but this is how we have chosen to cope

Okay... you do you... I feel bad for you but if that’s the case then this post is NOT FOR YOU. AND THAT’S FINE. I honestly do not care if you don’t care! I mean, I’m sorry anyone has to live in a world that drives them to that mindset, but I understand. This post is for anyone who might look at their lives and their choices and think “no wait, I unironically enjoy this and want more from the experience of that enjoyment than I’m currently feeling.” Everyone else can continue with their lives as usual.)

4. CONTENT THEFT IS NEVER OKAY. PERIOD. Things like “credit to the artist” or tagging gifs or images you found on pinterest as “not mine” isn’t actually credit. If you can’t source an image or gif set, DO NOT POST IT! We don’t REPOST (i.e. save an image and then create a new post with it as if it was our own creation). We REBLOG (click the little square arrows and reblog from the actual creator). That goes for gif sets, fanvids, screencaps, meta, fic... everything.

(hopefully everyone here already understands this one, but I felt compelled to include some “these are stupidly obvious” reminders anyway, since this is ostensibly some sort of advice column. This is the equivalent of the warning label on your toaster reminding you not to use it in the bath. Like... duh...)

5. Close kin of item 4 is SOURCE YOUR SHIT.

(for 100% disclosure purposes, I specifically discussed this one in this specific way because of an influx of anon ask messages I received in the wake of the finale. Literally the inciting incident for creating this entire post was what I can only assume was a joking ask about a comment Misha made at a con years ago. Someone actually bothered to take the time to type out those sentences to me. I have no idea what they were expecting in reply, or what could possibly motivate them to send this comment about something so entirely random from, again, several years ago. Just a joke? No idea, but whatever... it got me thinking that there might actually be people who are new to the fandom who MIGHT actually care about the fandom history, and maybe they just don’t know where to go for that info, or how to even begin searching through 16 years of history for things they might actually find enjoyment in, rather than just hauling random out of context garbage out on main and pointing and laughing about it now. People are actually allowed to care about things. It’s not cringeworthy to actually care about things, and you are not alone in actually caring, and there’s this whole big room over here full of people who are thrilled to share in that with you. This post is intended FOR THOSE PEOPLE SPECIFICALLY, so if that is not you, please just continue walking by.)

Yes, I know lots of y’all are new around here right now, but dredging up stuff from years ago that fandom has completely debunked and presenting it as TRU FAX again is just exhausting. We’re not trying to be party poopers, but seriously, we have seen it all and are mostly done with extinguishing bags of flaming dog poop on our front porches for the umpteenth year in a row. I’ve seen a lot of posts that have the same tone as “I saw Goody Proctor dancing with the devil” or “I heard kylo ren has an eight pack” and just... the information is there for anyone who cares enough to find it.

This goes double for “why is nobody talking about this thing I just discovered while watching the show for the first time?!” And, oh hon, we have talked it all into the ground over the last fifteen years. We’re happy you’re discovering it again, but I promise we talked about it plenty when the episodes originally aired. We have such a rich meta history that lots of us have worked really hard to preserve. I encourage you to seek it out, if nothing else than as historical artifacts. The way we have discussed the show has been a 16-year evolution. People have written literal doctoral dissertations on this show. Your shitposts are fun! We love reliving our own experience through fresh eyes, and seeing your wonder at experiencing it all again for the first time! But y’all didn’t invent this fandom in the last six months, either.

Meta Sources and Minerals provided by our friendly neighborhood fandom archivist, @lets-steal-an-archive

Academic books and articles about SPN

A collection of Meta Essays going back to s1 and organized by topic (all of this has happened before, all of it will happen again)

SPN Heavy Meta Archive (s1-3)

Mel’s Dreamwidth archive of meta (s1-12)

Oranges8hands Dreamwidth archive of meta (s1-15, with many similar entries to Mel’s... though ymmv on viewpoint in a lot of these too)

Anyone remember Fandom Wank? Not the concept but the actual LJ... No? Okay have a link to SPN topics that ended up there. Through 2013. We have seen so much... including several fandom containment breaches.

for all your art sourcing needs, please see @theroadsofararchive, the repository for so much fandom art.

need to find a gif of something? canonspngifs is a vast repository of gifsets of the entire series. If the gif you want to use in your post happens to be the first gif in the gifset, in the tumblr gif finder thingy just paste the permalink to that post from canonspngifs (which is easily searchable by episode, character, location, situation, quotes, and sometimes even color and clothing items the actors are wearing... it’s really well organized, especially for tumblr >.>) and the first gif will be automatically linked with credit to the gif creator attached. It makes life easy that way. It’s also convenient when trying to remember something specific but can’t remember what episode it’s from. I’ve used the site to jog my memory before going to the superwiki armed with more specific search results to find episode quotes and references. Or sometimes I just scroll through all the nice gifs for fun, too.

Need a screencap of something and know exactly which episode it’s from? Try Home of the Nutty. You might not find the exact screencap you’re looking for, but they have a complete set of caps of every episode, and it’s an incredibly useful resource for quick reference checks and the like. Just give pages a chance to fully load before clicking on the next one. The site is easily overloaded, but it’s still free to use (and again, with credit... Pretty much every screencap on my entire blog is from HotN unless otherwise credited).

As you can see, this is a fandom built on preserving our history. You absolutely are not required to engage with any of this if that’s not of interest to you, but I can only assume that there are people who would be interested in it if only they knew it existed and how to find it. Well, now they do.

6. A few more notes on tags, and how they work on tumblr. The first 20 tags on your ORIGINAL posts are searchable sitewide, so if you want to be able to find something again, tag that thing first before going on general tag rambles. The only place tags on reblogs are searchable is on your own blog. So you don’t have to put 50 tags trying to get a post seen if it’s a reblog. You’re just spitting into the wind at that point. If you have a filing system for finding things again, then by all means add those tags (again, in the first 20, so they’re searchable), but you don’t need to tag a reblog “destiel” and “deancas” and “dean” and “cas” and “dean x cas” or whatever. Pick one for your personal blog’s filing system, that’s all you need.

(this was only added because tagging and searching on this site is so very broken... I get that a lot of folks don’t care about ever searching their own blogs again for anything, so this one only really applies if you do often find yourself trying to find old posts. If not, then it’s not really relevant. It took me years to work out a decent tagging system, and at the beginning of my time here I never thought I’d end up camping out here for a decade and falling this deep into the fandom, and I regretted my lack of consistent tags only years later when I realized I actually wanted to be able to go back and find specific old posts again. So... for anyone who wants to err on the side of caution, working out a sensible tagging system really helps if you’re here for the long term. I personally tag content by episode, because some of my other general tags are so large as to be practically useless as a search term. But whatever system you choose to file stuff on your own blog, it really only has to make sense to you. And again, if this is pointless advice for someone who has no intention of settling here for the long term. Please feel free to ignore it. I just wish someone had explained it this way to me ten years ago and saved me the hassle of retroactively tagging something like 30k posts... especially now that using the mass tag replacer is the fastest way to get your entire blog deleted... oops? so yeah, don’t use the mass tag replacer either >.>)

7. Tags on Tumblr DO NOT WORK LIKE TAGS ON TWITTER. If you @ someone in the body of the post, it will show up in their notifications (if they’re the sort of person who even checks their notifications... not all of us do. For the record, I generally don’t...), but putting actor or ship names in the tags on a tumblr post does absolutely nothing. It’s not the same as tagging the actor’s twitter account in a tweet. Nobody’s getting notifications about you tagging a post about Jensen here as “Jensen Ackles.” There is a difference. Please learn it. (and don’t take headcanons and ESPECIALLY RPF or otherwise explicit art or fic from tumblr to twitter and tag the actors in it. That’s just... not okay.)

(I have seen the pearl clutchers getting all in a huff about the mere existence of RPF or even explicit content of fictional characters if it doesn’t meet their purity standards, but tagging those things allows people who don’t want to see it to actively avoid that content here. Nobody has a right to tell people their fictional content shouldn’t exist at all, or that creators of that fictional content somehow deserve harassment or threats for having dared to create such “immoral” content, won’t somebody PLEASE think of the children... and no... you do not do that here. Don’t be the problematic behavior you wish to ban from the world. Learn to use tags to protect yourself from, as i have attempted to emphasize here, fictional content you are personally upset by. That’s a you problem, not a problem for the creators of potentially upsetting content that they tag appropriately for.)

8. General formatting stuff: If you’re writing long text posts, visually break them up so people aren’t faced with one long wall of text. The enter key is your friend. Also, if you put long text posts under a Read More break and send people to your blog to finish reading, please ensure that your blog is actually visually accessible (tiny text, or light grey text on a dark grey background, or a visually busy background might be aesthetically pleasing to you but nobody can actually read it. Loads of folks won’t even try. Which is great if you don’t actually care whether people are able to appreciate your content or not, but something to at least consider if you *do* actively want to encourage engagement with your work. Confirm how your blog looks on both mobile and desktop and make sure it’s actually functional in both, too).

And since I mentioned that most of my experience on fandom tumblr has been in the SPN fandom, here’s a bit of a reminder for folks who are new around here. With the reminder that I have been here more than a decade and still feel like a newbie myself sometimes...

This is an OLD FANDOM. There are many, many people who have been at this longer than some of you have been alive. The average age for creators in this fandom is older than you think (I think of my friends in their 30′s as young’ins okay? okay). With that understood, you are responsible for the content you consume and are exposed to. Curate your experience. Ship and let ship. YKINMKATOK. Don’t deliberately expose yourself to content you find upsetting for whatever reason. Tags and warnings are your friends, not targets for you to attack in some sort of purity war. People will ship things you do not like (or in specific ways you do not like), will say things you do not agree with, and will find their happiness in things you abhor. That is not your concern. Find what you do like, and support and engage with it, and ignore (or block, or unfollow) the rest. Tumblr has a feature that lets you blacklist tags so the content you’re trying to avoid won’t appear on your dash.

Remember the paradox of tolerance.

It is not your job in fandom to police how other people enjoy the fandom. It’s not *my* job to police how *you* enjoy the fandom, UNLESS your enjoyment is in actively harming other real human beings in the fandom. If you don’t like their take on the character or the show or the plotlines or their ships or anything else, you don’t need to engage with their posts at all! The necessary corollary to this is that clarifying misunderstandings or correcting factual misinformation is not “policing.”

(this is where the peanut gallery reminds me it ain’t that deep, and I plead with them to put down the social media and find just one (1) thing to actually believe in in this godforsaken life, find something other than disdain and cynicism and spite to live for. If those things motivate you to find a larger cause for yourself, then great, use them to your advantage, but use them to find something that makes you a better person or brings you a modicum of joy and connection to your fellow human beings despite living in a dystopian hellscape of a world)

I have seen a lot of posts lately that are founded on the sort of authority that comes with “I watched through tumblr for a few months and then watched the last three episodes of the series” and as such are just... missing the larger context of the entire show, and are unfounded entirely in canon. I 100% appreciate the new enthusiasm for the fandom that we’ve been living in here for years, and it’s wonderful to see new people enjoying the thing we love. Your headcanons are valid, you are valid, but recognize that your headcanons aren’t canon. All of us finale denialists have accepted this in some measure, so we feel you. We truly, truly feel you. But regarding actual canon, we have a resource for that: the Superwiki. Learn it, live it, love it, as Metatron would say.

(which you could discover he said in 10.17 Inside Man, thanks to the superwiki! accept no substitutes!)

(and again, there have been people who have been involved in fandom for years who haven’t engaged with canon in years, either! You can play in this universe however you choose, BUT FOR PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY CARE ABOUT CANON AT ALL, WHICH I AM AGAIN POINTEDLY SAYING MIGHT NOT BE YOU, READER, AND I’M NOT SUGGESTING YOU ARE WRONG FOR NOT WANTING TO ACTUALLY ENGAGE WITH CANON, but if you DO want to engage with canon, please have some useful resources. Why do people feel personally attacked by being presented a list of helpful resources? Absolutely baffling.)

(also: words have definitions. “Canon” is a specific thing, meaning in this case “the finished media product that aired on television.” Anything beyond those limits is secondary canon (think: john’s journal, which is not canon but canon adjacent at best...), word of god (i.e stuff said by the writers and showrunners), or headcanon (which includes actor commentary-- they may have helped create the show with their acting choices and whatever, but they are not in control of the story overall). If there’s something you dislike about actual canon, you can reject it and supplement it with your own theories or preferred outcomes-- that’s basically what fanfic is-- but that doesn’t make your theories canon (much to all our dismay, that’s just not how any of this works. This is not to invalidate how anyone engages with the show or the fandom, just trying to clarify what seems to have been a source of unintentional misunderstandings. Your theories do not have to be “canon” to be legitimate interpretations.)

***I am setting this section apart, and did make a separate post of just this following information, because this is where we go from being relatively chill about different parts of fandom choosing to interact in different ways and you do you and blog however you want, to “hey can everybody please understand that the way you are interacting with this specific material might be harmful for specific legal reasons, and stating that you do not care about the consequences of your actions does actively make you the asshole here...” Okay, now that we have that understood:

The spnscripthunt collective has been steadily acquiring new scripts (which are posted in full on the superwiki for everyone to enjoy, for free). The language around how some folks are talking about these scripts is... concerning. For very real legal reasons, actually, and not because we’re feeling precious about the collection and don’t wike it when meanies use them in shitposts.

-First off, these scripts are not “leaks.” They are all verified and legally purchased (or gifted, in some cases, but still acquired entirely above board. we didn’t whack anyone over the head in a back alley for these scripts, or swipe them out of someone’s trailer on set).

(in case anyone was unaware, these scripts are the copywritten protected property of Warner Brothers. So yes, how we use them and share them with the fandom could have legal repercussions. We present them as a collected resource of fandom history which SHOULD fall under Fair Use doctrine, but this is untested legal water. Insinuating that the scripts are somehow not entirely legally obtained, or that posting them for public access involved less than 100% transparent and entirely legal transactions is incredibly concerning.

Once again for the peanut gallery, if you don’t care about any of that and are just having a good time with it, at least be mindful of the work and expense a large group of people have gone through to acquire and present the content you’re all too eager to exploit for cheap thrills. Some of us do actually care and are not exactly comfortable with the fact that others don’t seem to care about burning it all to the ground. We can’t force you to listen or behave as we’d hope you might, but at least be aware of the potential consequences of your actions. All we’re asking is for you to not be the douchebag who sets the whole neighborhood on fire with your illegal fireworks display. Is that too much to ask for? more on that in a second, first... a psa)

-If you see a script for sale and are unsure if it’s legit (or believe it might already be freely available in our collection), please feel free to ask us for advice. Our goal is to make as much of our fandom history available to the entire fandom, and we absolutely do not want anyone shelling out money for stuff you can already find for free.

(seriously, we’ve seen a bunch of resellers cropping up selling printed versions of the scripts we bought and uploaded for everyone to enjoy free of charge, or scripts that are otherwise of dubious origin. We’ve been at this for years now and know what’s actually out there. We don’t want anyone to fall for a scam if we can help it)

-Also, the usual reminder that the scripts we acquire ARE NOT NECESSARILY THE FINAL SHOOTING DRAFTS. In fact, the majority of scripts in our collection are NOT. Changes are made daily to scripts, even during filming. Comparing a Production Draft (white pages, effectively the first “final draft” of what usually becomes a series of drafts before filming wraps) to a much later revision (say... green or goldenrod revisions, several of which we DO have in our collection for comparison) and how those earlier drafts often differ wildly from the aired version versus how similar a much later green draft is to the aired version, for example, can teach you a lot about the television writing process. The link above to the superwiki scripts page has a nice little explainer about how this process works.

Differences between our posted scripts (many of which are white drafts, aka FIRST complete drafts, which will likely go through multiple rounds of revisions before filming even begins) and the aired version of the show are not all “acting choices” or a director or editor just cutting whole scenes on a whim. It’s insulting to everyone involved in production to suggest that’s the case.

(and yeah, fine... whatever, make any sort of posts you like regarding how those changes came about, but at the very least understand that it’s not actually the truth about how any of this works. Don’t care that that’s not the truth and want to make the posts anyway because shitposting is fun and that’s the extent of your sense of humor? FINE! You’re entitled to do that! But at least you DO know the truth now, and hopefully so do the people who engage with your posts. Deliberate ignorance isn’t cute, smooth lions notwithstanding)

There’s probably a whole other post to be made on fandom tagging etiquette, but again I don’t really use the tags enough to know what’s going on with that whole situation. I’ve also probably left a lot of stuff out, so please feel free to add things I’ve overlooked.

Thanks also to @trisscar368 and @thayerkerbasy for help compiling this, too. They were kind enough to escort me through the park to feed these pigeons. Now I need to take them out for ice cream. :’D

So I guess welcome to the neighborhood. Make yourself at home, but like... try not to trash the place while you’re here. Some of us live here by choice, lol.

#this blue hellsite (affectionate)#fandom problems #kinda wish i'd made this post six months ago but here we are i guess lol #long post #now edited for the people who are actually personally invested in the fandom #thanks for participating in this little experiment and I hope this version is actually informative to those who are interested #meaning there's a lot more links to stuff and explainers and whatnot...#and one last reminder that for folks just swinging through for laughs absolutely none of this applies to you #if you are legit interested in fandom history and preservation as we move to the post-canon world then hopefully this is useful to you

382 notes · View notes

studythenight-away · 4 years

Text

Hello! As finals season (aka 5-research-papers-due-in-a-week season) dawns on many of you, I thought I would share the process I used to write papers in college. This made writing long research papers much less daunting (but can also work on shorter papers). I really hope this helps some of you who feel stuck. Especially during these ridiculous times, when you're stuck at home and might have other uncontrollable factors affecting your mental health, a clear framework of what to do could be helpful. Good luck, my friends! You got this.

About me

I graduated college in 2018 with degrees in Political Science + International Studies and will be starting law school this fall. I wrote nearly 20 15 to 25-page papers, never earning below an A. I loved researching about my topics but hated writing. It's tedious, takes so much time, and everything I write sounds bad at first. Plus, I was a terrible procrastinator so most of these essays were written in under a week. Talk about stress.

Over time I found a process that worked for me, one that made churning out a paper seem straightforward, like going through a factory line rather than this terrifying concept of writing 10,000 words. It kept me sane without decreasing the quality of my work (or more importantly, how much I learned!)

I'm thinking about making a short video to show this in action… let me know if that could be helpful!

Step 1: Research

How you organize your research is a key step in keeping you sane. Usually I'll have a pile of 20 books in my dorm along with dozens of JSTOR tabs open on my laptop, and that can get overwhelming very fast. Right now just focus on collecting ideas, not developing an argument or even an outline! As with most research papers, you could be starting with little to no background information on the topic, so it is still too early to be thinking about an argument.

Put all your research in one document

Open up a new doc: this will be the heart of everything. For a 15-page paper I usually end up with around 14-18 pages of typed research, 10 pt font, single spaced, tiny margins. This seems like a lot, but essentially all I do is type up anything I read that seems relevant to my topic, so luckily this step does not require that much brain power. Just type type type!

Use the table of contents

Find the chapter(s) that are actually relevant instead of skimming through the whole book. Time is of the essence here!

Use Zotero, cite right away

You can also use easybib or whatever you're used to, but keep track of your sources. I like Zotero because I can keep a log of all of my sources and copy the footnote or bibliography version whenever needed. Before you even begin reading, cite the source and copy it into your research doc. This will save you so much time later when you have to put in your citations in the actual paper.

Here is an example of what my research doc looks like:

Full citation is my heading for each source just so it’s crystal clear

I ignore all typos (I don’t think there are any in this part though, go me!) because my head is buried in the book just trying to get all the info down

I always start with the page number so I know what to cite when I go back

Create a shorthand

While typing up research, you might think of something that the author didn't talk about that you'll want to write in your paper. Or perhaps a few sentences already start to form. Put them all in one place, with your research, so you know what source you'll have to cite to then lead into your idea. I type "!@#" before anything that is strictly my own idea so I'm never confused. It's fast and stands out.

This is an example: the two bullet points above are evidence from my source, which made me think of this argument I could make, which I noted with “!@#”

Step 2: Read Your Research

Now that you have all your information, go back and read through it all. Every time you read about a new theme/person/event, write it down somewhere. You may come up with a list of 20+ different ideas in your research. No matter how small, as long as there is something about it, write it down. Each of these mini themes is going to end up being a paragraph in your paper or combined with another mini theme.

Once you’ve made your list, look for larger overarching themes. In the paper I’ve shown you, I had mini categories like “political party x” “religion” “labor groups” “little organization” and “hierarchy.” When I looked back I though, hey these are all groups and how groups are working together, so they each became their own mini paragraph under the subsection of “Alliances.”

As with most research paper structures, I try to find three general themes/subsections (like an extended version of that 5-paragraph essay we wrote in middle school). It makes the paper less messy and also makes sure I’m not covering things that are beyond a reasonable scope.

During this step, you are also searching for your thesis. It won’t be your final version. As you fill in your outline in the next step you may make slight changes. But this is definitely when you start thinking about it.

Step 3: Outline

We’re ready to outline! Once I’ve collected all my different themes and organized all my subsections and paragraphs, it’s time to fill in that outline. I start a new doc just for the outline and take advantage of google doc’s headings function to make a clear document outline.

Here comes the fun part, I read through my research one more time, this time copy and pasting all my research into each section of the outline. The document outline in google docs makes this easy because I can just click on each subheading to get me there (super helpful when you’re dealing with 15+ pages of research).

Here is what it looks like:

Let’s say I need to add something to my outline about labor groups. Boom, labor groups. Also, the typos are really abound here haha

Step 4: Write the Paper

Okay, I get it, easier said than done. BUT! You already have everything set up. Your outline is essentially just a list of your paragraphs and all you have to do is paraphrase, cite, and create a topic sentence. And that’s how you should think about this: you’re essentially transforming bullet points into sentences and adding footnotes.

In high school my English teacher introduced us to Sh*tty First Drafts for creative writing, but honestly the same applies to research papers. Sometimes I’ll even have phrases like “wait no that’s not what I meant but basically...” and when I go back to edit, I realize that what came after “but basically...” is fine! And I keep it. So just start typing.

How do you cite while you write? Because we’re trying to get a constant stream of writing going, inserting proper footnotes after each sentence you type is too bothersome. I usually split screen with my outline and my paper so I just copy and paste a few words from my bullet point into my footnote, like so:

(This is from a different paper about cluster munitions.)

Step 5: Edit the Paper

I work best when I print out my first draft and make all edits in red pen. I feel more productive and can visually see where I want to move sentences and what I need to change. The more red there is the better I can feel the paper getting. (Whether or not that’s true doesn’t matter. We’re trying to stay motivated here!) When it’s all digital I don’t really see the progress. Plus, once I finish all the red, I get another moment of passive brain work, where all I’m doing is transferring edits rather than thinking. And at this point in the process, that kind of relief is much welcomed.

The good thing about this process is there’s not usually a need to cut entire paragraphs or pages because the paper you end up with is just a formalized version of your outline. Because you started with such a detailed outline, the cutting and editing now is just to refine your word choices and get rid of the “but basically”s. You’re almost there!

Step 6: Replace your citations

Now it’s time to go back and replace your footnotes with actual citations. Zotero makes this easy because in Word you can just insert and add the page number, and it’ll automatically do “Ibid.” for you when needed. Ctrl+f in the original research doc to quickly find the source.

Step 7: One More Read-Through and Submit!

Congratulations!! You’ve got a fully-researched and well-backed paper! Of course, even though the process is straightforward, it’s still a lot of work. In ideal situations I would start researching two weeks before the deadline, but if need be, I believe I’ve done this all in three miserable panic-filled days as well.

Please message me if you have any questions at all! I really hope some of you find this helpful! Good luck!

#studyblr #college #university #writing #essay #study tips #studytna #original #research #research paper #study #student #school #you can do it!

4K notes · View notes