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thepradapariah · 4 months

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Astrology Observations

Twin Flames 😇😈, Karmics 🪐 & Soulmates 🕊

AUTHOR’S NOTES

Hello to all the Kosmic Baddies!! And welcome to all the new ones! I ADORE you all. All the positive comments and words of encouragement really make my soul warm and it means the world to me that you enjoy the content as much as I enjoy making it.

You all have given me the energy to write something else! And I appreciate it because I get so bored……………………………………

Thank y’all. Love y’all and I hope y’all enjoy this post. If you aren’t interested in my definitions, you can scroll down to the observations. I promise, I won’t take it personally :)

With Love & Lust,

A-D

INTRODUCTION

Unlike most of my other posts, this is a breakdown for how to read soulmate connections in a chart. Most of these observations are ones that me and my sister made just studying couples in pop culture and in our personal relationships. I thought it would be a fun post to write how I categorize these different kinds of relationships.

This post is probably my most subjective in awhile. These aren’t rules, per-say, but they are patterns I noticed when studying different relationships.

First, I will breakdown MY interpretations of what all these different titles mean, and then I will breakdown how they MAY appear in a chart. It is imperative to have the correct birth details for these observations to reign true. In Vedic Astrology, you don’t have to have a birth time because you can use these same calculations through the Moon chart. (Making the moon sign the ascendent. For instance, I am an Aquarius Sun and an Aries Moon, so my Moon chart starts with Aries. So my first house is in Aries, Second house in Taurus, third house in Gemini etc. My sister on the other hand is a Gemini Sun, Scorpio Moon, so her Moon Chart would be Scorpio in the first house, Sagittarius in the second house, Capricorn in the third house etc. Moon charts are a nifty thing to look at when doing astrological overlays, particularly if you don’t have an accurate birth time).

Again, just a friendly reminder that this is a PERSONAL OPINION piece. Now, for those of you who have been with me for my previous post, you know I’m not talking out my ass. So I can absolutely promise that I am giving you the most educated and thought out explanation that I can give at the moment. I am by no means the final say on ANY of this stuff, I am far from God and don’t want to be the judge or the jury…it is faaaarrr too much work. But please understand that there may be some things in this post you disagree with~ that is LOVELY, share your opinion with me in the comment section, I am more than happy to hear from you and listen to your insight!

But without further ado, let's break this down shall we?

DEFINITIONS

Karma:

Hinduism, Buddhism. action, seen as bringing upon oneself inevitable results, good or bad, either in this life or in a reincarnation: in Hinduism one of the means of reaching Brahman.: Compare bhakti (def. 1), jnana.

Theosophy. the cosmic principle according to which each person is rewarded or punished in one incarnation according to that person's deeds in the previous incarnation.

Soulmates:

Soulmates are just that– a mate for your soul. This is another soul, individual, or essentially another life force that you just “get”. Every relationship comes with its ups and downs and soulmates always seem to find one another no matter what. I find animals to be some of the BEST examples of soulmates out there. Isn’t it crazy how you can form a bond with another life force? I don’t find it to be a coincidence that animals and their hoomans can even look alike!

But enough with the furry friends, let's talk about hooman friends as well! Soulmates can also manifest as people (duh…)– whether super long lasting or a fleeting moment. Some friendships can prove to be some of the most profound soulmates in the course of a lifetime.

And of course…a soulmate can be a lover. We will discuss what can make a soulmate different from a twin flame further in the post. But yes, soulmates can absolutely manifest as boyfriends/girlfriends/theyfriends/husbands/wifes/partners etc. This is probably the most common and sought after kind of soulmate in mainstream culture, but I cannot express enough how soulmates can manifest in so many different ways. You know how Prince would rock out with that beautiful purple guitar? I consider that guitar to be a soulmate? After all, they shared a vibration and what is a man without his tools? As long as science says that everything is made up of tiny atoms, and each person, place, or thing contains its own vibration, we are bound to time and space by our soul’s connection. These types of connections help us move through the void of the darkness and chaos that is the universe, and we will be defined by the contracts of our souls through lifetimes and eons. (Smeeexxiiii, huh)

Twin Flames:

All twin flames are soulmates, but not all soulmates are twinflames. This is IMPERATIVE to understand when you are defining your connections for yourself. It seems to be trendy in mainstream culture to conflate the two, but these relationships have very distinct qualities and very different karmas (lessons). For the sake of starting on solid ground, let’s say that Twin Flames are like soulmates on steroids. Why? Because the contract level of Twin Flames can be an extremely heightened feeling and bring out the best and worst of ourselves so we can confront ourselves through a mirror like image, a reflection, if you will, so we can truly see ourselves through a 3rd eye perspective. Sounds like a lot of mumbo-jumbo, huh? Well, it kind of is. This may be a hot take, but it is an important one, NOT EVERYONE WILL EXPERIENCE A TWIN FLAME RELATIONSHIP IN THEIR LIFETIME. I repeat, NOT EVERYONE WILL EXPERIENCE A TWIN FLAME RELATIONSHIP IN THEIR LIFETIME. Why? Again, because this is HIGH level spiritual work that most souls just aren’t prepared to encounter. To be fair, just because it’s high level spiritual work does not equate to it being “high vibrational”. Most Twin Flame journeys deal with lower vibrations in order to raise them. So don’t confuse the work with the payoff. Twin Flames catapult one’s soul to the next dimension when it comes to spiritual growth and learning. One of the most popular modern examples of a Twin Flame relationship is…drum roll, please…Twilight (Spoiler Alert!). Bella started out as an innocent, run-of-the-mill suburban average teenage boring, blah blah blah, nothing-special kind of girl, with perhaps a proclivity towards darkness, who got entangled with a 300 year old vampire (or however old….), went on to experience the highs and very very very lows of a relationship, flirted with death, lost him, got him again, was deflowered, got pregnant, damn near lost her life trying to give birth and ultimately had to be “killed”/ “turned” by Edward– literally (or figuratively because it’s in a book…) “dying” to be born again and made anew. Essentially growing from an innocent virginal girl, to a very powerful woman & mother. Meanwhile, Jacob, who I would argue is simply a soulmate (see the difference…he was obviously the “safer” choice, but would not have sparked that dramatic of a shift in her soul) just watches from the sidelines. It’s just worth noting how traumatic that entire 4-book series and 5-part movie is from Bella’s perspective, but also from Edward’s. His darkness engulfed her willingly, like Hades to Perspephone. He wasn’t really a willing participant– until he unleashed all his passions and desires onto her. She reflected back to him a purer version of himself that was lost to the past and to his “vampirism”, while she was drawn to him to take her out of the mundane expectations of suburban living. Both parties were made to sacrifice a sacred part of themselves in order to embrace one another, but ultimately to embrace their truest form. For Bella, it was her becoming a mind-bending vampire…a FAR cry from the less than average suburban girl she started as. And for Edward, it was to bring love and happiness back into his life. He had to let go of his “I’m a monster” perspective of himself and see that although he is a lust driven, blood sucking, overly wealthy, perpetual teenager…he is…in fact, worthy of love. Awwww…now isn’t that just…romantic? To the teenage version of me…yes. To the adult version of me who has bills to pay…not so much. However, the story is a powerful one because it clearly illustrates the drama, the passion, the highs, the lows, the love, the lust, the hate, the envy in a spiritual twin flame connection.

(Tangent, but the word envy made me realize another key difference in the twin flame journey versus the soulmate or karmic journey…Envy plays a major part in twin flame relationships. There is something that you feel your twin has, that you feel like you don’t. Going back to our Twilight example, Bella envied Edward for his mystique, and his seemingly other worldly experiences. She envied his relationship to his own darkness. She found him interesting, to say the least. He was a masterful artist, a great pianist, wicked smart, and a selfless individual. Bella, at best, was a mid-level high school student. She didn’t have any talent, any hobbies, any desires. She was very boring and humdrum. She envied him for being so ridiculously complex. She was essentially a blackhole, wanting to be filled by him– sexually, physically, mentally, etc…She wanted nothing more than to dissolve into his world, inheriting his self-hatred and his life issues (like the Volutrie)...she envied his essence. On the other hand, Edward was envious of her purity. He found deep comfort in her lack-lusterness. She was beyond ordinary. So ordinary, in fact, she became extraordinary to him. To see a virginal young woman, full of life, and promise, brought him great desire. A desire he fought for like 3 books/movies. Edward, was by far, the “runner” in this scenario because he absolutely felt that his presence in Bella’s life would destroy her. And for what it’s worth, he was absolutely correct. He demolished her from the inside out– taking her virginity to ultimately making her a mother, an evolutionary act within itself. The triumph of the virgin to the whore pipeline (lol, no pun intended, but pun definitely accepted). Tangent over lol)

BUT what makes them a twin flame specific quality is the fact that you realize, you are actually the same. Edward was equally as dark as he was pure and same for Bella. There was no need to envy one another because they were both capable of all states of being. Edward and Bella are a good and bad example of twin flames, because they are the rare twin flames that stay together. So it’s beautiful they were able to find a middle ground and create a child and merge families–blah blah blah…but, that is pretty uncommon. MOST, not all, but MOST twins do not end up with a happily ever after. They usually are unable to reconcile their souls' differences. These relationships are usually to prepare one another for a high vibrational soulmate.

Karmic Soulmates:

Karmic Soulmates, are souls that have past-life unfinished business OR are meant to inspire a lesson that may or may not be resolved in this life in general. Karma/Karmic is a neutral term, so this type of relationship doesn’t have to be inherently good or inherently bad. It is a relationship that brings forth lessons so the soul can carry out the rest of its karmic mission. These relationships can play out in a romantic way, but they tend to be more on the platonic side. You can be in a Karmic relationship with your mother, brother, sister, teacher, etc. as well as a place! You can have a significant bond with a city, country, place and time. Anything that promotes the soul’s growth through support, challenges and forces you to learn, is a karmic contract/soulmate.

You are certainly meant to learn. But because of Karma being ruled by the planet Saturn, these relationships can go on for a long time, can be extremely difficult and will keep pressisting until the lesson is learned and the karma is fulfilled.

Karmics tend to have a negative connotation, particularly in the youtube tarot world, but it genuinely doesn’t have to be. In fact, I argue that all significant relationships are inherently karmic– be it clearing up Karma from a past-life, or creating new karma for the next.

Always remember, the universe is neutral. Lessons are neutral. Love/Hate is…neutral. We need not judge the nature of any relationship, including our own, if it means to help enlighten, enrich and grow our souls. We are social creatures and we don’t learn lessons about ourselves in a vacuum. Different souls, people, places, and things can trigger our growth in ways that we are incapable of imagining beforehand.

I say all that to say, as one of my favorite quotes from a family friend who passed away years ago said, “some things, you just don’t need to experience”. There will be times in life where you touch the fire and need to feel it to get burned…other times, you will know what that burning feels like and will turn away. This is the perfect system of Karma. Sometimes you will get burned, whether you “asked for it” or not, and other times, you will know that there is no need to even play with the fire to begin with.

So take everything in life with a grain of salt and a shot of whiskey! Life is supposed to be fun…even the not so fun parts! Live, laugh, love, lust & learn! Enjoy the moment.

(This is a great example of a non romantic karmic, he wrote this song for his grandmother who passed & it catapulted him to another dimension career wise)

OBSERVATIONS

Observation 1

Do not underestimate the power of Chinese Astrology

Hear. Me. Out. I haven’t found a more accurate astrology for relationships than Chinese astrology. Crazy, I know. But Chinese Astrology is extremely straightforward. Screw the birth times, you just need a month and year and you’ve got all you need. I always joke that I exclusively date through Chinese Astrology, but I am seriously only half kidding (lol). I kid you not, whenever I study my relationships through this particular astrological lens, I am genuinely AWE STRUCK with how uncannily accurate it is. Try it! Next time you find yourself dating, or even checking the compatibility with your current mate, read a few articles and see how it lines up for you. I’m sure you’ll be pleasantly surprised. I manifest partners through their Chinese zodiac because I am so passionate about it! It hasn’t let me down yet!

***Note: I don’t have this as an official observation because it’s not astrologically based, but look into numerology as well when studying compatibility! It is VERY insightful.

Observation 2

Usually Twin Flames/Soulmates have Gemini placements somewhere in their personal planets or ascendent

So this take may not sit well with everyone, because you may feel limited in the types of soulmates you can encounter if you don’t have any Gemini placements. Fret not, keep reading, you may fit in another category.

I am not saying that this is the LAW, I am saying this simply is something I have noticed when studying what I consider twin flame relationships. In most Twin Flame/Soulmate relationships, the Zodiac sign of the twin is usually present for BOTH individuals/souls. The psychic nature of Gemini makes it very easy to just “get” someone, and feel as if you’ve known them for years. Have you ever heard two Geminis talk to one another? It can be hard to keep up with them!

Soooooo…..I feel the same to be true when it comes to these kinds of intense relationships.

It is also worth noting that Gemini is ruled by Mercury. Mercury/Hermes in Greek Mythology is the only God that can travel between Mt. Olympus (Heaven, so to speak) and The Underworld (Hell, if you will). I think this is important because it demonstrates why Gemini placements in particular can experience a love of such depth. It can go into the pits of hell and to the glories of heaven with ease, making it one of the most valuable placements for a twin flame relationship.

Another note is, in traditional tarot, The Lovers card is depicted by the twins. I feel this is a significant indicator of a deep soulmate connection because of the telepathy and how intertwined lovers/gemini energy can be. The inherent closeness of these soulmates is intrinsic to closeness that is required for any level soulmate/twinflame. Nonverbal communication can play a major role in these types of connections. As chatty as Geminis can be, it’s what they don’t say that ACTUALLY matters. Only another Gemini person would understand that.

Now, Virgo is also ruled by Mercury, but Venus is in detriment in the sign of Virgo. I don’t think Virgo fits this description as well, because Virgo is inherently about solitude, represented by The Hermit in traditional tarot, making it more about virginity/purity than about a 3D twin flame physical connection. To be honest, I just haven’t witnessed it as much when dissecting charts, but I will study it more and perhaps my opinion will change. But as of right now, I don’t believe Virgo placements depict as strong of a connection as Gemini in this case. Feel free to prove me wrong! I’m always open.

Back to Geminis…It seems so weird that Gemini energy would be the ones who attract such intense relationships because they seem so, unloving…but one of my favorite Gemini on Gemini relationships is Courtney Love (Gemini Sun & Moon) and Kurt Cobain (Gemini Moon). Ooof. OOOF. But it was like they had their own language and lived in their own world. Now, that relationship ended up in tragedy…but hey…they had some “fun” moments. They were so similar and too similar at the same time, that it fueled an outwardly bizarre connection, but to them it made perfect sense. This is the power that a double gemini connection can have. Minus to tragedy part.

Observation 3

Twin Flames almost always have the SAME zodiac placements or DIRECT OPPOSITE zodiac placements.

This rule, without fail, is one of the most important and powerful observations that I have come across. If you are checking the zodiac for twin flame compatibility, I will almost say YOU MUST have the same or opposite placements in the big three (rising, sun, moon) and/or Venus and Mars.

This can be ANY SIGN in ANY HOUSE.

For example: You have Sun in Scorpio, Moon in Cancer, Rising in Sagittarius…Your twin could have Sun in Virgo, Moon in Taurus, Rising in Aries. Because the Sun and Moon are in opposite signs, you could experience a twin flame relationship.

Another example: You have Sun in Gemini, Moon in Aquarius, Rising in Pisces…Your twin could have Sun in Libra, Moon in Leo, Rising in Aquarius. Because the Moon and Rising are in the same sign, you could experience a twin flame relationship.

You can mix and match, as long as something mixes and other things matches (lol). I’ve seen so many charts of couples that share placements or have opposite placements and immediately I go “uh! Twin Flame!”.

I think this is due to the illicit push and pull nature/mirroring nature of Twin Flame relationships.

This is where “real” science comes in. All energy has an action and a reaction to create equilibrium. This is why this particular observation is so important. As I’ve stated from the beginning, when it comes to Twin Flame relationships, they are meant to teach, expand, challenge and heal, so it makes sense that you would be met with the opposite force and attract one another OR the same force and repel one another. (Let’s talk physics…think magnets…two positives and two negatives repel, but a negative and a positive attract…woot woot! Call me Bill Nye biiisshhhessss) The entire effect is to make your soul ebb and flow so it can reach a state of neutrality. You want someone to challenge your opinions and your sense of self so you can know what/ who you are. If you’ve never had a mirror, how do you know what you look like? Again, the same is true when someone is so similar to you. You may look at them and go “wow, is this how I come off?”. Just to reemphasis, I don’t want this to come across as an inherently negative thing, it doesn’t have to be. It just usually requires a highly developed spiritual understanding to see that. This particular alignment can give the “can’t live with em, can’t live without em” feeling.

If you have complementary placements, like your Sun is in Capricorn and your partner has their Moon in Taurus, this may be more of an indication of a soulmate connection. The same can be true if you are both air/air or air/fire or water/water or water/earth.

Now, another way you can see it is if you have opposing elements. But, I don’t think it reads as strong as actual zodiac signs.

Just to be clear, all my examples thus far have been using Sun, Moon and Rising, but this trick can extend to Mars and Venus. So let’s say you have Venus in Cancer and your partner has Mars in Capricorn…it counts!

Observation 4

For long-term compatibility, your partner’s Venus will be the same as one of your placements in your big three or your venus– ESPECIALLY WOMAN in Heteronormative connections or Males in same-sex relationships.

Trigger warning for those who are sensitive about pronouns…please use your imagination. I am talking about ANCIENT astrology, so it is rooted in traditional gender norms. You may disagree, that is fine, no judgment, but for the sake of this observation, you can bear with me…or ignore it. The choice is yours!

Now, I am talking about a man’s Venus placement here. In traditional astrology, Venus indicates the man’s wife. So if your “man” has Venus in Pisces, you may have Pisces Sun, Moon, Rising OR Venus/any other water placements. This would make you complementary. In fact, I would say if his Venus placement aligns with your chart, other placements in the chart won’t matter as much.

For example, You are a Gemini Sun, Libra Moon, Aquarius Rising. If your partner is a Pisces Sun, Cancer Moon, Scorpio Rising, BUT their Venus is in Gemini, Aquarius, or Libra…you’re in luck! From the big three, it may seem as if you are completely incompatible, but low and behold, your partner loves what you are putting down, so the “differences” may not be so different after all.

Venus is EXTREMELY important to long-term relationships. So is the 7th house. I won’t go down that rabbit hole for this particular post, but keep that in the back of your mind.

These connections may not be as intense as Twin Flame, but this is certainly a great indication for a wonderful connection. Let me say, like I said in the beginning, not every soul needs to experience a twin flame connection for its evolution. If you are wanting something more grounded, then follow this rule of thumb when checking initial compatibility with a partner.

BONUS: If your person’s Venus falls in your first house, this is a great indication of producing love at first sight! Now…other placements matter, obviously, but this is an extremely powerful indication of strong, immediate, attraction.

Side Note: For Women, you would look at your Jupiter placement for compatibility with your “husband”! I find that you can also use this rule for Mars when it comes to “boyfriends” as well.

Observation 5

Synastry and Overlays Matter!!!!!!!

Definitions:

Synastry- When comparing two natal charts, this calculates the planetary alignment between two individuals.

Examples- Mars conjunct Venus or Sun trine Saturn

Overlay- When comparing two natal charts, this calculates how a person’s planets fall into another person’s house system.

Examples- Person A’s Jupiter is in Person B’s 8th House. Or Person A Venus sits in Person B’s First House.

(if these are new concepts to you, I HIGHLY suggest you do some research. Tumblr has some wonderful posts dedicated to these practices that are highly informative. I would love to do posts concerning synastry and overlays in the future!)

Okay, this may be the MOST important observation, but it is more advanced than Sun/Moon/Rising/Venus compatibility. This requires you to have knowledge of the WHOLE HOUSE system (sorry, western astrology) and deep comprehension of planets, conjunctions, oppositions, trines, squares and aaaaallll that good stuff.

My sister and I LOVE synastry and overlays. It really puts entire relationships into context to see how your chart lines up and what underlying energies you’re dealing with, regardless of the actual placements. How the planets react to one another and how those planets show up in your chart is MUY IMPORTANTE! Chances are, if you’ve read these other rules and they haven’t resonated with you, I guarantee, you’ve had a relationship that is based more on planetary alignment than zodiac compatibility.

(Just to be clear…this is why I started off with Chinese astrology…Chinese astrology is INSANELY accurate and doesn’t require nearly as much study as what I am saying here. DO NOT underestimate the power of Chinese astrology when it comes to compatibility. I love how accurate it is with very little information.)

With this rule, you don’t need birth times, but my goodness do they make an impact when doing overlays. If you don’t have accurate birth times, always remember you can do it off the moon chart, which essentially makes the moon the ascendent sign. Just know, for an accurate overlay, you will need to use the moon sign for BOTH charts. It will not be as accurate if you use your birth chart with an accurate birth time and overlay to their moon sign. It isn’t “wrong” per say, it just isn’t nearly as precise. You want to use the same charts. Moon charts overlay one another and natal charts overlay one another. If you have both birth times, then do both! Go wild! The more the merrier!

Now, I am not going to go in depth about what these two practices mean, because that’s an entire post within itself and I wanted to keep this one “short and sweet”. But I will say, for a rule of thumb, if you have strong trines, oppositions, and conjunctions with a person, that is an indicator of a twin flame, soulmate, and karmic connection. If you have Saturn, Pluto, Venus, Neptune and Mars with low orbs, this can indicate a soul contract/intense connection. If yours or their placements sit in your 1st/7th/8th/12th house, this can be a VERY strong indication of a powerful & spiritual connection. There are plenty of ways this can be mixed and matched. The relationship between two charts is so important, they are a study within themselves. I am only scratching the surface here, so if you are a novice, again, I cannot express enough how exciting it is to do some digging when it comes to this stuff in relationships.

There are plenty of free synastry calculators online, so please use them as a resource– even if you don’t understand the calculations, it is important to see the results. These placements can truly unlock a much deeper understanding of your relationships that you just won’t get when it comes to looking solely at your charts at face value!

Let me know if you’d like me to discuss these topics further moving forward! You know I love to spread the knowledge, and there is just something so sexy about synastry and overlays…it’s honestly one of my favorite parts about Vedic astrology!

Bonus: North Node/Rahu and South Node/Ketu can play a VITAL role when determining what kind of karmic relationship you are in.

POP QUIZ

Just kidding, there is no test, because I’m too lazy to grade anything, BUT here is an example of what I’m talking about when combining the previous observations. I am not doing a super deep dive, but I want you to see how everything overlaps and intersects.

Let’s use Rihanna and ASAP Rocky as an example. Their connection hits on a few different cylinders. Rihanna is an Aquarius Sun and ASAP Rocky has his Venus in Leo. Why does this matter? Although Rihanna is an opposite, so Sun opposition Venus, which is twin flame-y, she is a FAMOUS, CREATIVE, ENTERTAINER and MUSE…this is ALL dealing of the 5th House/Leo energy, so it make sense…for now…as to why he would be attracted to her. She has No Leo placements in her big three, but because it’s the opposite, we go to that push-pull magnet thing I was talking about earlier. As far as how their relationship will play out long-term, I have ZERO idea, but I can say their attraction to one another is very real, but it will probably be volatile at times because of the Sun Venus Opposition. I’m sure her ego will cause difficulties to his love language, BUT he may be able to take it, because his Venus is ruled by the Sun. See how layered and complex it can be? And we are just looking at one placement. They work because he enjoys the attention that she brings (not in a vampire way, just in a “wow, isn’t my lady so cool” kind of way) and he allows her to shine without dimming her light, while she enjoys the fawning that he gives her. He loves that his partner is larger than life and Rihanna is larger than life because…well…she’s Rihanna. She is able to appreciate him, because at this point in time, he doens’t in any way seem like he is trying to compete with her. He is a confident person who can stand beside and behind such a force, BECAUSE he has such a strong Venus placement.***

Relationships aren’t black and white. These are just observations and rules/patterns that I have found to be true. But as you’ll see, as I have presented, some things will contradict, some things won't make sense, what makes sense for one chart doesn’t make sense for another. Etc… This is such a fun topic because it really is like a puzzle. And it really is a case by case basis. The more in depth you can look at a chart, the more knowledge you can walk away with.

FINAL THOUGHTS/MINI RANT

Oof….okay, what a ride! (Can you believe I had the intention of this being a short post. HA!) I hope that you were able to take something away from this post and learn something new! As you can see…there is a very intricate science behind how soulmates/karmics and twin flames work. It is so much deeper than saying “oh wow, that’s my twin flame”...like…maybe? I feel mainstream spirituality/astrology/tarot has taken that phrase and run with it. And saying “if you identify as twin flames then you are” is misleading. It really isn’t something you “identify” with. They either are or are not your twin flame. There isn’t an in between. It is not ambiguous and it can be fact checked. Also, twin flame makes it seem like you can only have one…I don’t think that’s the case. I think you meet as many “twins”/mirrors/soulmates/karmics as you need until your soul learns the lesson. Have you ever felt like you just keep meeting the same person over and over and over again? That’s because we are talking about soul recognition and not necessarily 3D body recognition.

You may be attracting different “people”, but you could be attracting the same “spirit”. So don’t always get so hung up on a particular person. TRUST ME BABES, if there is unfinished business, that same energy will come back around over and over and over and over again until you geeeetttt ittttt.

Another note is, if you’re like me, and you have exalted Venus in Pisces conjunct Ketu…then every relationship feels twin-flame-y. Why? Because I have my relationship planet tightly conjunct my south node, so I am on a spiritual journey on my own when it comes to relationships…my twin flame is most likely…Jesus Christ…sooooooo……yeah. (I kid, I kid, but not really. My placement can indicate being a nun…and trust me, after dealing with the crap I’ve had to put up with when it comes to these men folks, I have absolutely considered giving my body to God…cuz these men just don’t do right…lol…anyways…) Men and relationships have become my life’s work…which is why I am here sharing this information with you today. Each relationship is very nuanced but all have similar themes.

I am very much into tarot and astrology and all the things, but I do feel like there is a fad going around about this twin flame business. And as much as I enjoy a tarot reading popping up on my tiktok talking about my “twin”, I am always acutely aware that it can be a mislabeling and inspire people to put up with all kinds of crap for the sake of the label. If you’re going to be in a shxtty relationship, then be in a shxtty relationship, but don’t misuse the word. Twin Flame does not automatically translate to terrible, explosive, runner-chaser relationships and it does not excuse poor behavior. There is a difference between someone who is making mistakes because they are trying to learn and someone who is taking advantage of someone who won’t stand up for themselves. Sometimes, someone you like, just doesn't like you and your ego in tandem with your fear of rejection/abandonment is preventing you from actually growing and pursuing a relationship that would benefit and promote your soul’s growth. It’s almost like getting stuck on level one of a video game. Until you beat that internal need for validation from one specific person/soul…you’ll never get to play the next part of the game. Now…this isn’t me saying that soulmate/twin flame/karmic relationships don’t have their downsides, but I am saying, at least know the kind of energies you’re dealing with before you go putting pressure on a presumably less evolved/knowledgeable individual expecting them to “challenge your soul” and you haven’t even challenged yourself. This whole twin flame ordeal is like handing a toddler some markers and leaving them alone in a room full of white walls– it is bound to get messy. Soulmates are a BEAUTIFUL thing. And very rarely, I mean VERY rarely can a twin flame move into a more relaxed “soulmate” relationship. It is not impossible, but the amount of effort that is required to transcend, is unbelievable. BOTH PARTIES have to be spiritually mature and aware to do the work. This connection is NOT one sided…BOTH individuals are required to learn, grow and HEAL. Mind you, healing is the main reason for these kinds of relationships. There is no way to heal when your relationships keep pouring salt into an open wound. People can get caught up with and hang on to people for far too long because of a mislabeling. It is equivalent to a misdiagnosis from a medical doctor. Sure, you may have a cold, but if they misdiagnose you with a broken leg…are you receiving the right treatment? NO! And now you won’t heal properly! TO BE CLEAR…I believe in fate– so if you meet someone and you have an extraordinarily intense connection, you probably fit one or more of these rules and THAT IS why I am making this post. I want you to do the research for your own sanity so you can express FREE-WILL in whether you want to walk down that path or not with a certain individual– while also knowing the other person has free-will too. No label, or synastry, or overlay, or Chinese compatibility will change the fact that you may be fated to meet someone, but free-will may take you down different paths.

On another, equally important note…It is also possible to end up and stay with the wrong person. It is! You may look at a chart and follow some of these patterns and realize, you have NO BUSINESS with that individual. But people end up with the wrong people all the time. People have wasted LIFETIMES with someone they had no business with. But their ego decided they were a “soulmate” or a “twin flame” or they aren’t “healed”/spiritually awaken enough to realize they can do better…and low and behold…they were wrong and they wasted precious time. Now they’re miserable, can’t figure out why, and they end walking straight past a real soulmate in a supermarket…unable to even recognize them because they are so bogged down and clouded in their unhealed ego and a bad relationship that has cut them so far off from their own divinity, they can’t recognize love if it smacked them in the face. DON’T LET THAT BE YOU!

THERE ARE LEVELS TO RELATIONSHIPS!!!!!!!!! Not every soulmate will be as intense as the next. Not every boyfriend/girlfriend will be as compatible as the last. Love is a game of musical chairs. There is movement, there is stillness, seats get taken away, and eventually, there is a winner. And babe, it will ALWAYS be you. You will always be the last one standing when it comes to relationships because you have free-will. (Let’s not forget the importance of the 1st House/7th House axis. You vs Relationships. It is as equally you as it is them.) You are bound by nothing. You are bound to no one. You are love. You are light. If you do the work, you may find a wonderful, loving, long-lasting relationship full of romance, but this is not guaranteed. You AND your partner have to choose each other every single day. The best relationships require discipline, work, forgiveness, “God”/some higher power, and love– no matter who you cross paths with in this life…you have to do this for yourself first and foremost. Alas, if you are too caught up in people who won’t meet you in the 3D, let alone the 5D…you will always fall flat of what you are looking for. The chair will always be ripped from under you when the music stops. Always. All of this is irrelevant if it doesn’t come from within. And this is why I want to express it one last time…NOT EVERYONE WILL EXPERIENCE A TWIN FLAME CONNECTION. You don’t understand how much you have to overcome rejection, overcome fear, overcome lust, desire, ego ALL the things, to open yourself up enough to join forces with another soul and try to tackle life together. Your ultimate lover is not your savior– they are your equal. You have to save yourself. You are not your ultimate lover’s savior. THEY have to save themselves. You ain’t super(wo)man and they aren’t either. Your partner has to be willing to do the same work…THAT’S what makes them a twin. It is not because they are treating you like shxt, babes…

Learn the lessons. Do the work. Love every bit of the journey…especially the crappy parts, because THAT’S what will make it all worth it in the end and you’ll enjoy the beautiful parts as much as the Greek Gods enjoy sweet nectar and ambrosia.

Why is this important to differentiate? Why now?

Now, one thing is for sure…and two things for certain, I am psychic and I have seen in my crystal ball that there is heavy energy of union in the atmosphere. I am hoping that whoever stumbles upon this post, is on the path of self-discovery which ultimately leads to liberation because not all union is good union. (I think covid brought in a lot of bad unions for example…but that is another topic for another day). The days are getting darker, and the evil forces are getting stronger (am I being dramatic enough for ya?) so it is important to know exactly what we are all up against. Only few are chosen to be in relationships that are led by light. There is so much overwhelming darkness now and I don’t want anyone that I am influencing to fall into the trap. There is potential for WONDERFUL, POWERFUL, SEXY, LOVING, LONG-LASTING & HIGHLY SPIRITUAL unions right now. But you may be tempted by something that seems beautiful and it is nothing of the sort. So please, do your research. Love with all your heart. Let spirit lead you! Let love find you, there is no need to seek it out! Take calculated risk! Open up your heart chakra! But ultimately, always be mindful of the wolves in sheep's clothing.

Ciao ✌🏾

#astrology #astro notes #vedic astrology #astrology observations #sidereal astrology #astro community #astrology notes #astro observations #tarot #Spotify

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halfratsalready · 6 months

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“No-one’s perfect, but mom says we’re not trying hard enough.”

Some thoughts on Jack’s legendary avatar quote and its implications.

Everyone is super curious about who the “we” in this quote is, but when I first read the quote, I actually didn’t think of it as referring to a third person. Essentially, I think a lot of people interpreted this as Jack saying that Night Swan said something like “you’re not trying hard enough.” But when I read this avatar quote, I interpreted it as Jack saying that Night Swan herself said “we’re not trying hard enough.” Obviously, I could just be interpreting it wrong, but I don’t think I’ve seen anyone talk about it in this context, so I thought I would throw my thoughts out there.

(This turned out way longer than intended so there is a TL;DR at the end!)

I’m not saying that Night Swan would actually be referring to herself in saying “we aren’t trying hard enough,” which sounds weird at first, but lemme give you an (admittedly kinda unrelated) example.

When my cat would do something he wasn’t supposed to do, I didn’t just tell him “no.” Obviously, cats don’t understand spoken language, but I think we as humans tend to talk to pets like we do children and I don’t have children so this is the closest personal example I have. Basically, if my cat got his claw stuck in something, I didn’t say, “you don’t put your claws in things.” I would say “we don’t put our claws in things.” I don’t have claws and this sentence clearly doesn’t apply to me, but I still used the words “we” and “our.”

Unbeknownst to me at the time, this is actually part of a parenting method called positive discipline, where scolding is rephrased to become more like a lesson. Something as simple as replacing “you can’t do that” with “we don’t do that” actually has profound psychological implications that make children more likely to act on the things they are told.

There are several studies that have been done and many more that are ongoing into the power of word choice when it comes to personal pronouns (I, you, we, etc). Using the word “we” implies a shared experience and can be more persuasive. Other studies have shown that children better learned how to play games when they were taught the rules using the generic-you or we pronouns.

According to Harvard Business Review, many leaders and higher ups in the business world use “we” in place of “you” because it implies community and makes the person being spoken to feel like they’re part of something as opposed to being singled out.

All of this is to say that saying “we’re not trying hard enough” could be a manipulative choice of words on Night Swan’s part. By using the word “we,” she would be implying a sense of community that could make Jack more likely to strive to try harder than were she just to tell him outright to try harder (and none of this is to say that she still couldn’t be referring to others in addition).

TL;DR, I interpreted Jack’s quote as coming from a direct quote from Night Swan, along the lines of “we’re not trying hard enough, are we?” Not only is it reminiscent of the way we hear adults speak to children, but it also has psychological implications that could be an attempt on her part to make him work harder at trying to achieve perfection. Saying “you’re not trying hard enough,” whether it’s just to Jack or to him and others, comes across like an attack, and while I don’t think that Night Swan particularly cares about hurting feelings, I do feel like she’s smart enough to know that her choice of words is important, especially to a child who is very easily influenced by words alone.

I’m not saying that I think this is the right interpretation, but I thought I’d share it because I haven’t seen anyone else talk about it this way :)

#food for thought I suppose #I didn’t mean for this to be so long #you can really tell I’m a writer huh #just dance #jack rose #jack rose jd #jack rose just dance #night swan jd #night swan just dance #just dance fandom

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punmasterkentparson · 2 years

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How to Comment on Fanfics! (A Guide for the Socially Anxious)

I'm autistic and find socializing with people to be scary af, and that used to include commenting on fics. Now I'm 35 and I've been through multiple fandoms and written plenty of fic, so I'm comfortable on both sides of the fence. Below are some tips and tricks for commenting on fics, to help you when you really want to let your fav author know how much you appreciate their work but aren't confident on what to say.

Feel Free To:

Leave comments. You don't have to say something original or even with words; emojis are great!

Say what you liked. "I love their chemistry." "The scenery description was *chef's kiss*" etc. Hearing about your experience of the fic is what makes the writing worthwhile.

Quote specific lines from the fic. No need to write a thesis on the narrative whatevers of it. (Although long comments are also good!) Even a simple "THIS! THIS HTIS THIS!!" lets the author know you appreciated what they wrote, and it makes them warm and fuzzy.

Comment several times. You know how the AO3 kudos button works only once? Comments work every time! You can use the above methods for commenting multiple times, or even leave a simple "Darn kudos button, let me leave more kudos!!" to let the author know you enjoyed their work more than once.

Share how the fic was meaningful to you. I wrote a fic about the nature of getting older, and lots of people shared their experiences of growing older in the comments. Don't share identifying information (name, country, date of birth, etc.)! Stay safe. But reading and writing fic can be cathartic for both parties, and it's okay to talk briefly about how an author's story mirrored your own life experiences, and how it made you feel understood or seen.

Try Not To:

Nitpick spelling, grammar, punctuation, etc. Sometimes, authors will leave notes (top or bottom of the fic on AO3) saying "Please comment with any mistakes I made!", and that means they're interested in feedback. ("Sorry for any mistakes," on the other hand, is generally a request that you to overlook them.) Unless an author explicitly asks for feedback, refrain from commenting on mistakes in public. Maybe the author was writing in their second language for practice; maybe they have dyslexia; maybe they were tired when they uploaded the fic and didn't check. The fun part of fic is that it's not under the level of scrutiny as traditionally published works. If an author has lots of mistakes that bother you, try reading fics by someone else.

Argue whether a story follows canon. Fanfic is fun because it doesn't have to follow canon. It doesn't have to make sense or follow any rules. If a ship or character portrayal doesn't match the original media, that's okay. The original media doesn't change!

Talk about what the author could have done "better." This can be anything from how they wrote the dialogue, what words they used for descriptions, the tense they used (present or past), the POV (first, second, third), etc. The point of fanfic isn't to write the best thing possible, it's to have fun. What if someone said you can't build sandcastles on the beach unless your goal was to become an incredible sand sculptor? It would take the fun out of playing in the sand.

Ask the author to change something in their story. Generally speaking, once a fic is published, it has reached its "final form." Asking an author to go back and change what they wrote because one person thinks it could be better is making unpaid demands on their time. NOTE: If you want to be involved in developing and editing fic, you can volunteer to be a beta reader! You can offer to check spelling and grammar, characterization, story development and narrative flow, canon compliance, even use of culture or language (i.e. "Britpick" fics about British media written by non-British writers).

That's all off the top of my head for now. Feel free to add notes to this post with your own dos and don'ts of leaving fanfic comments. Be encouraging! Fanfic and fandom courtesy are a communal effort, and ensuring that everyone feels welcome to do their best and make mistakes along the way is the best way to ensure fic and fandom continue to be a safe, fun place for all of us.

#fandom #fanfic #fanfiction #writing #fanfic comments #fandom culture #fan culture #fan fic #fan fiction

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redemptiionss · 2 years

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Trying to learn ASL, any tips?

Hello! I’m glad that you've taken an interest in learning ASL; I wish you luck on your language learning journey and that I hope you enjoy learning it!

**This applies to all sign languages, not just ASL.**

So my main tip— If you truly want to learn ASL, then you also need to make friends in the Deaf community and socialize at Deaf events. Just like with any other language— language immersion is how you learn best as you are being exposed to language in its most natural context / environment.

Second tip- Be conscious about WHO you are learning ASL from. There are legitimately millions of ASL teaching/learning videos out there online made by hearing people who 1) are NOT native ASL signers and 2) barely know anything about ASL and the Deaf community, and/or literally JUST started learning ASL. I’ve seen plenty of videos, and they’re honestly so bad. The truth is, they know that what they’re doing is inappropriate and wrong. They do it for clout, tbh. Fame, views, whatever. They know that other hearing people who are genuinely eager to learn ASL are not going to know whether they are actually learning ASL signs correctly or not. These people often have more power and influence than the Deaf people who are expressing their genuine outrage over this, and they know it. And these Deaf people who are expressing their concerns get ignored and labelled as being unreasonable and whiners as a result. I’ve literally seen this happen so many times online. 🙃 So yeah, try to be conscious. There are qualified Deaf native signers out there teaching ASL & offering ASL classes. Give them your support and attention please!

Third tip - During conversations, don’t be afraid to tell us Deaf people that you are new to learning ASL, and to slow down if needed! We know what it’s like to nod nod nod and grin and say yes and pretend we understand a hearing person who’s talking at us, when we actually don’t understand everything that’s being said. We can often tell when you aren’t understanding us so don’t be afraid to ask us to slow down or to repeat what we said or ask about a new, unfamiliar sign!

Fourth tip -

ASL signs are not English words.

ASL signs are ASL concepts.

Many hearing people misunderstand and think that ASL signs are basically English words, or that there is an English vocabulary equivalent for every single word in ASL. That’s not how languages work.

ASL signs are ASL concepts, which may have an approximate equivalent meaning in English buuuut may not 100% fit. OR may not have an equivalent at all.

I only say this because I think it’s important to remember this! You may already know this. But many hearing people don’t realize this. Same thing with ASL’s grammar being different from English. (A lot of hearing learners end up signing word for word in English grammatical order-- which, of course isn’t ASL.)

Fifth tip- A lot of ASL grammar is on the face and the body (also known as non-manual markers, in ASL linguistics)-- it’s a very important part of ASL. So don’t be so stiff with your facial expressions! Non-manual markers influence the meaning of signs, and serve a role of modifiers, adverbs, tone, etc in ASL. There are some rules regarding facial expressions, which you’ll learn-- and should be learning from your ASL instructor.

Oh and there’s classifiers too, but you’ll also be learning about that from your ASL instructor lol.

#answered #sorry.. it's been a while yikes. i finally had the energy and the brains to finish this. lol #but yeah ummmmmmmm i hope this was at least a bit helpful lol #txt #asl

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taylorannnx · 2 years

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Writing Your First D&D Supplement

My bread and butter for almost 2 years now has been editing supplements for fifth edition DUNGEONS & DRAGONS (aka D&D 5e). As I move on to the next chapter in my career, I wanted to share three things I've learned as an editor and a writer starting out in D&D design.

1. There is no course to teach you how to write for DUNGEONS & DRAGONS.

While there are some amazing and helpful classes from the Storytelling Collective about writing your first encounter, adventure, or designing dungeons, the courses give you elements that you need to include in your designs, pointers on layout and resources you can use, but there's no instructions on the wording for skill checks or advice on how to write concisely.

These are all things you have to learn for yourself, whether that's through finding helpful professionals on the internet or blog posts on D&D Beyond or third party websites such as Kobold Press or Ghostfire Gaming. I highly recommend reading officially released content to learn the phrasing of certain rules and to see what you can learn about the types of things to include in your first supplement.

2. You don't need to drag official content down to make your thing look good.

Being dissatisfied with the rules as written or lack of options is a great motivator for making new content! If you're looking for something that isn't there in the core texts, chances are that someone else out there is looking for the same thing! The issue comes when writing introductions or summaries or marketing/advertising text; a lot of people get anecdotal or criticize the core content before saying how their product "fixes" that.

Don't. Do. That.

Why? Well, if you want to get hired as a freelancer or as a game designer for Wizards of the Coast [WotC], I doubt they'll take kindly to your words (words that they own if you publish through the Dungeon Master's Guild [DM's Guild]). Read introductions from WotC content or from best-selling DM's Guild titles to figure out what your introduction should say if you're stuck, but a good rule of thumb is to talk about the merits of your work outside of its relation to the official stuff.

Bad writing:

"As there are only limited tracking spells in D&D which shuts off a lot of the possibilities and tropes of the fantasy genre, this book of spells fixes that by adding 12 new location spells to D&D 5e."

Good writing:

"This catalogue of spells expands your abilities to magically track and locate people, places, and objects in your fifth edition DUNGEONS & DRAGONS game! Live out your favourite fantasy tropes by incorporating 12 new spells at your table."

3. Publish something you're proud of, not something that is perfect.

Humans are prone to error all the time. Ninety-nine people can read the same book and not notice the one spelling error caught by person 100 and that's okay. You are going to improve as you go along. Adhere to the style guide as best you can. Read every sentence out loud to make sure it sounds right and correct it where necessary. But don't spend hours late at night the day before launch fixing loads of tiny things because you've decided it could be better. That's not good for your mental health and honestly, you'll make mistakes whether you obsess the night before release or not. Do your best but if you mess up, you can always fix it and republish at a later time if someone calls it out, or know better for next time if it goes unnoticed.

Proud of. Not perfect.

I hope these lessons were helpful! If you're interested in my work (and my own journey of getting better with each subsequent release), check out my portfolio or follow me on Twitter (while the website is still alive!)

#dungeons and dragons #ttrpg design #taytrpglessons #first time game design #writing your first d&d supplement #ttrpg community #ttrpg industry #dnd5e

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holden-caulfield · 3 years

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Desperately

↪︎ 𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

SUMMARY: reader and blaise are partners in potions class and he lets something slip about a certain friend of his.

WARNINGS: none i think!

WORD COUNT: 1513

A/N: this is my entry for @simpology 's writing challenge with the prompt "Oh, and he's wretchedly in love with you"... hope this is good :)) the plot is kind of confusing but just go along with it

"Do you have the instructions?" asked a nonchalant Blaise Zabini as he settled next to you, letting his bag fall down next to his chair.

"Of course, yes. We'll need-"

"I know, i've already picked everything." he said hurriedly as he placed several bottles and containers on the table, surrounding the boiling cauldron at the center of it.

"Oh! Ok... we can start then, we'll have to add-" you interrupted your reading as you noticed Blaise already pouring a non-specified quantity of some green liquid into the cauldron.

You eyed him curiously as he continued the potion-making on his own.

"Why did you ask me about the instructions if-" he raised his index finger in front of your face, successfully shutting you up and irritating you at the same time.

He poured another range of ingredients in the cauldron and began mixing, finally raising his eyes at you.

"Now we can talk about important things." he stated, not stopping his movements.

"You just interrupted me twice in the span of 5 minutes, what could be possibly more important than the potion that Snape is going to grade today?" you asked with annoyance audible in your voice as you crossed your arms in front of you.

"Don't worry about the potion, it's going splendid. We have far more important matters to discuss." his calm voice was doing nothing to soothe you, instead doing just the opposite.

"And what is that?"

"You." he announced, remaining as stoic as a statue.

Your eyes widened at the mere syllable that had just left his mouth.

"Me? And what about me?"

"Not exactly you, more like your current situation." his eyes bored into yours with such coolness you wondered whether you were the daft one there.

"My situation? And what-"

"Your sentimental situation." he cut you off. Again.

"It's the third time you do that."

"And you keep on posing questions but i'm the one that should be asking and we don't have a lot of time. Do you know Draco Malfoy?"

"What does that even mean?!" he raised an eyebrow at you, unimpressed, and you simply scoffed. "I'm not interested in whatever game you are playing right now, Zabini."

"Just answer my questions, y/l/n, i swear there is a point." he continued stirring the concoction, eventually dropping new ingredients. You sighed but decided to play his game.

"Yes, yes i know him."

"How would you describe him?"

"Zabini, i swear, this isn't making any sense, can you-"

"What did i say about asking questions?" he scolded you. You rolled your eyes and narrowed them at the boy in front of you.

"Fine. He's blond, tall-"

"Not physically, you idiot." he scoffed and you smiled to yourself, which made him eventually soften his gaze.

"He's a slytherin and..." you didn't know what to say. You obviously knew about his past actions, he wasn't exactly well-seen at hogwarts.

"And?" he asked expectantly.

"And i don't know, he's not the nicest person around, i think."

"Interesting." he muttered, almost to himself as he got lost in his own thoughts. "What do you think about me then?"

"You? You are like him, aren't you?" you asked, smirking as you did so.

"I don't know, i'm asking you." he said, returning the smile with playful eyes. You scoffed and returned to your potions book but Blaise snatched it our of your hands. "We were talking, weren't we?"

"We were supposed to brew a potion, weren't we?" you asked, mimicking his previous sentence while taking back your book.

"I got that under control." he added other ingredients and at this point you were wondering whether he knew what he was doing or whether he was improvising just to talk to you. "So, me and Draco are the same, correct?"

"Actually," you said while trying to find the passage in your book, "i hope he has half the patience i have or he should have hexed you ages ago."

You skimmed through the pages but you couldn't find the right ones. Blaise grasped it again and hid it behind his back, earning the most choleric stare you could muster.

"Or maybe i don't. I'd love to see him hex you. Know what? I might do it myself."

"Now that's a wonderful idea." your eyes widened again and, furrowing your eyebrows, you just stared at the boy i front of you, wondering what had happened to him. "But i had something else in mind. Why don't you go take your book back, we might need it."

You switched your gaze from his own eyes to his hands and noticed that he had no longer the book, instead his wand, pointed towards one of the other tables of the class. A table you noticed had two copies of the same book on it, meaning one had to be yours.

"What game are you playing, Zabini? Do you even know what you're doing there?" you asked, pointing to the concoction.

"I don't, so you better get your book back if you want to fix this." he said and you could feel anger boiling in your chest at the smugness of the slytherin.

You marched towards the table, exasperated.

"Oh, and y/n?" you turned around while walking, eyes still flaming with annoyance, "he's wretchedly in love with you."

You couldn't process the new cryptical information as you bumped into someone. You immediately returned your eyes to the front of you, finding a tall blond there, holding your book in between your bodies.

"Is this yours?" he lifted slightly the book but you were speechless. What had Blaise just said? "Cat got your tongue? I'm asking if this is yours..."

Your eyes darted from his to the book several times before settling on the latter.

"Yes! Yes, it is." you finally spoke and heard chuckling coming from behind you. Blaise.

Draco handed you the book and you took it slowly, still unsure of what your next move should have been.

"Wait!" you said, a little louder than you intended to but enough to catch his attention as he was returning to his own workplace. "Do you- uhm..."

He stared at you, waiting for you to finish your sentence but it was not as easy as it sounded.

"Do you want to switch partners?" you managed to let out, visibly confusing him.

"You want to be with Nott?"

"With you actually... Blaise said-"

"Blaise said what?" he suddenly got more serious, his irises darkening as if you had just created a storm.

"He said-"

"I said you are the best at potions and she needs help. Desperately." Blaise came up from behind you, laying his hands on your shoulder, still stiff from the embarrassment but it immediately vanished as you heard the voice, leaving its place to irritation.

"I do not need help and most certainly not desperately." you stated indignantly and the blond in front of you let out a small chuckle, earning himself an angry look from you too.

"I'll leave you to it then." he said smirking and you quickly grabbed his arm to prevent him from leaving you with Blaise.

"Please no, i can't bear another minute with him." you pleaded, which made the blond suppress a chuckle and his friend roll his eyes, clearly annoyed.

You stared at him for a moment longer as he did the same, almost as if time had frozen.

"Well... i'll leave you two to it" Blaise began to make his way to Draco's previous working table, "maybe you'll finally be able to tell her about your crush on her, huh?"

Draco's head whipped towards Blaise as fast as lightning, a panicked look ruling over his features. His best friend kept going, leaving the two of you alone, speechless.

You stared at him and he stared at you.

"I like you too-"

"He was kidding-"

"Oh." you both said in unison.

He stared at you and you stared at him. No more words were exchanged, just looks.

"You like me?" he asked tentatively.

"He was kidding?" you retorted, slightly hurt and embarrassed now.

"That depends."

"On what? On how ridiculous i must look right now?" you continued, the embarrassment turning quickly into annoyance.

"On whether you really like me or not." you were still unconvinced, his face unreadable as you tried to look for an ounce of sincerity in his silvery eyes, "Because i do like you, y/l/n."

Your brows still furrowed, you stared at him inquisitively.

"Were you the one kidding?" he asked now, suddenly self-conscious, letting out a single dry nervous chuckle.

You scrutinized him a little longer, noticing his confidence wavering and his patience thinning from the way he was looking at you.

"I wasn't." you finally stated, smirking at the blond boy in front of you.

He furrowed his brows too, the corners of his mouth hinting at a slight smile. But the sharp hit on both of your heads delivered by professor Snape made you both hurry back to your table.

"Get back to work."

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transmasc-wizard · 2 years

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POV and Tense in Your Writing

Hello hello HELLO tumblr, I am once again posting writing advice after like 2 solid months of not doing that!

Today's topic is, obviously, POV and Tense in your writing. Specifically, I want to talk a bit about what expectations, feel, & narrative distance certain choices with your POV & tense can create.

First:

An obligatory reminder that the only set rule to writing is "break the rules that don't work for you" and that anything can work if you're determined enough to pull it off. This post is just me talking about what is usually signaled by which POVs and tenses. Additionally, I will not be talking much about second person or future tense, as those are both uncommon in published novels and I have very little experience reading & writing them. Now, on we go. (This post got long, so I put it under a keep reading.)

What is POV?

"POV", or "point of view", is used to describe who the story is being told through and how. You must have at least 1 POV character, or there's no story, and you can go all the way up to omniscient POV. Unless they're omniscient, POVs usually switch instead of happening at the same time. POV can be told in the following ways:

First Person stories are told directly by the character who's eyes you're seeing it through--they will use I, Me, We, My, Myself, etc. ("I go to the movie theatre and I eat popcorn.")

Second Person POV is when the author directly addresses the audience--the story is about YOU and will use you, your, and other second-person pronouns. It's not common. ("You go to the movie theatre and you eat popcorn.")

Third Person Limited is when the story is told in from the eyes of the specific POV character/characters (one at a time) and uses he, she, they, and other third-person pronouns. ("They go to the movie theater and eat popcorn. He would prefer a sci-fi next time; he wonders what she thought of it.")

Omniscient POV/Third Person Omniscient is when the narrator has access to the thoughts and feelings of everyone in the story. It is essentially a story told by god; they know all, and you will find yourself in the heads of many characters at once. ("They go to the movie theater and eat popcorn; she thinks the movie is great, but he'd prefer a sci-fi next time.")

Single POV is when there is only 1 POV character; everything else is multi-POV (or omniscient, but that's technically multi-POV as well).

What is Tense?

Tense is used to express time reference, i.e. whether the story happened before, after, or during its being told.

Past tense is used to tell stories that have already happened. ("I went to the movie theater and ate popcorn.")

Present tense is used to tell stories that are happening as they're being told. ("I go to the movie theater and eat popcorn.")

future tense is used to tell stories that happen after they are told. ("I will go to the movie theater and I will eat popcorn.")

literary past tense is used to tell stories in past tense, but with the feeling that they're happening now. This one is trickier to explain, but basically, past tense can & will reference the present and acknowledge that it is telling a story that has already happened; literary past will act like it is a present tense story, but use past tense words. (Many people who say they're writing in past tense are specifically writing in literary past tense.) Percy Jackson is in past tense; Six of Crows is in literary past tense.

What Effect Do POV and Tense Have On The Story?

Different POVs & tenses have different strengths and weaknesses. Whatever POV/tense you choose should be one that you think will best fit the story; your YA book does not have to be in 1st person single POV present tense just because that's common in YA, I promise. There are more logical choices. (Though again, skilled writers can make anything work.)

Present tense, single-POV, and first person tend to do very well in stories that need to feel immediate, close in narrative distance, emotional, and/or high stakes. Present tense, by virtue of presenting itself as if it's happening right now, can feel very easily like the character's future is uncertain and no one knows what's next, even though the story is already cemented in what will happen. Single-POV makes it easier to have a close narrative distance, and therefore be more emotional (and high stakes); this is because you can focus entirely on one character, and you don't have to worry about the weird feeling of ripping the reader from one distinct mind and into another. First person also has a closer narrative distance (there's NONE, they are telling the story) and therefore is easier to make feel emotional.

Thrillers, romances, contemporaries, and dystopians are often (though not always) told using one of these 3 forms of POV or tense, as those are genres that highly benefit from little narrative distance and from a feeling of immediacy or uncertainty. (The Hunger Games [dystopian] and Can't Take That Away [contemporary] are told in 1st person, present, single-pov; Karen McManus' thriller/mystery books are often in 1st and present.)

Past tense, literary past, multi-POV, omniscient, and third person limited do very well for stories that need to be on a grander scale or that require a more fairytale-esque feeling to them. Past tense, as it presents itself as having already happened, is good for stories where you want to truly remember that someone is TELLING this and it's a STORY. Literary past has that story-like or less immediate feel of past, without pulling the reader directly out of their immersion, and tends to be a happy medium between past & present. Multi-POV stories let you get more done and see more things, as well as sort of naturally having a bit more narrative distance because you're not constantly in 1 head, really close. Omniscient is how many folktales/fairytales are told and therefore has that feeling; it also has all the benefits of multi-POV. Third person limited is more removed/distant than first person is, and pairs well with multiple POVs. It again allows you to feel more storylike, less immediate, or have a grander-scale story.

These 5 forms of POV and tense are often used in SFF, historical fiction, and literary fiction, as those are genres that benefit from larger scale, more people telling the story, or a bit more distance. (The Six of Crows duology and Darker Shade of Magic trilogy [fantasy] are in literary past, 3rd, and multi-pov.)

It is important to note that you can of course write a heart-wrenching & emotional or immediate and high-stakes story with things that are not present/single-pov/first person, and you can write a grand, epic or fairytale-like story with things that are not past/multi-pov/3rd person--this is entirely about what the tenses & POVs tend to naturally lend themselves to. You can and should play around with them as you see fit. All of this is, you know... learn the rules before you break them.

I hope this was helpful for someone! :D

#writblr #writeblr #pov #writerblr #writing advice #nico yells writing advice into the void

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1111jenx · 4 years

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U R MEAN LOL U EVEN DONT CARE WITH LILITH ON 3RD HOUSE SHHHHHYYYIT

Haha hey love,

I do admit I've been ghosting tumblr more often recently, trying to finish some of my work and completing readings have been a loooot🥲 But now i'm back and i'll get right into it:)

🎬Lilith in the 3rd house🎬

check out my on-going Lilith series here

Besides talking about communication and one's intellect capabilities, the third house also is know for covering one's relationships with their siblings, their aunts and uncles and even their relatives in general!

The third house like the other two air houses, discuss a lot about the people and communication.

Hence with Lilith - signifying restraints here, it is possible that natives with Lilith 3H never felt understood or felt as if they struggled to find people who share the same vision, the same way of approaching the world. Its because when they were younger, i'd say that around their primary or secondary education, their ideas and intellect abilities were questioned and were not listened to by their surroundings, neither by their friends or by their close family (third house rules over one's education)

Either amazing communicators or people who are terrified of speaking up.

While I think a lot of them were indeed talkative and sociable people when younger. However, there's a high chance that natives with 3H Lilith grew up often hearing questionable rumours about them from random neighbours to their close friends. This in turns demotivated these people and they'd then tone down their more extroverted side and are less likely to debate or raise their opinions. It is rejection they're afraid of.

It's funny how most people I know with this placement are extremely intelligent and knowledgeable about a series of topics. They can go from discussing such abstract ideas such as philosophy to ideas that are so close to our lives like politics. One thing I notice is that they're usually the quiet observer in the crowd. They see everything. They just don't say it. For their own sakes sometimes even😌 ( Karl Marx has his Lilith in the third;)

Because of this dynamic, a lot of Lilith 3H people have the ability to swerve their way out of trouble like no other. They're the one that would talk their way out of murder type beat. Ruthless and sometimes had a harder time tapping into their more emotional side. Lilith enjoys being in an air house and then gifted these natives with amazing communication capacities granting that they're taking in horrendous rumours&backstabbing from others. They traded their credibility for their own gain from others. Would really make their way out of a money scam if they wanted to.

Consequently, every story has a story behind it. I think Lilith 3H natives grown to be such sweet talkers is because when they were younger, not only did they experience rejection in terms of their ideas and knowledge, someone within their close family or friend group could have been the reason why they obtain their more cunning traits. This person, whether a family or friend, was emotionally unavailable and they focused a great deal on winning people over rather than understanding people. They wouldn't stop until they get what they want, often by using their charming words and fascinating minds.

Natives with 3H Lilith model this but they also despise this. A deeper part of them resent their lies so much they started to question their own sanity. Is it possible that they too, are starting to believe their own lies? If yes, what would that make of them? A true intellectual, it is these questions that keep them up at night by themselves, while they no longer need to speak to anyone but their vulnerable selves.

When they enter the real world, they can sense that sometimes people recognize their power immediately as they speak up. They're cunning, suave but powerful and domineering with their words. They are demanding and detached but smooth within their communication, leaving people wonder if they actually care as much as they say. It's like their words trigger some thing in others, they have the ability to manipulate and control people. If harsh aspects are present, they will not think twice before using it against others.

They can literally be seen as a sl*t or received horrible slut-shaming banters as they go to school, work or even near their own house, on the street they live. Once crossed, these natives are merciless and you would not even realize it.

Think about how Lilith is very primal in the sense that she's our deepest nastiest lil secret, but she's also natural to us. Depends on other placements, one might reject her while another might celebrate her. Lilith 3H natives, being in an air house, the same element as Lilith, own the ability to control others thoughts and minds simply by talking. Plutonians heavy or air heavy people might recognize these people ability yet others have a harder time seeing through their friendly facade.

They're that random person you met at the bar whom you slept with simply because they knew "what to say". They're that toxic ex who would tear up and talk their way out of serious issues, who would lie without blinking twice and let you think you're the one who's delusional. But they're also the ones with a welcoming nature when you first meet yet as time passes you realize while they're surrounded by people, they do not have their own people.

Not gonna lie, they're so very prone to having a god complex. Similar to their sister, Lilith in 9H, their thirst for knowledge is insane and insatiable. They'd want to know more and more about someone before leaving them because they now know enough. I truly think that deep down, these individuals are just as lost souls as anyone else, 7H struggles with partnerships, 11H struggles with communities but 3H struggles with creating meaningful or healthy casual relationships. Could have been labeled as the blacksheep of the family. (even extended one)

Their siblings may or may have not been very cruel to them or they could have had a fall out. Or they could have a deceased sibling(Need to look at other placements to further determine) Nevertheless, their siblings/neighbours/earlier education is crucial to explaining why they are the way they are today.

True students of life. They don't just read book, they consume them. They inhale the words and knowledge as if its their last breath and they couldn't help but yearn for more and more. Could very much surprise other with how passionate they're when it comes to obtaining new information.

I would have to warn these people though. Their minds are their strength yet it would also be the dead of them. Avoid gossiping, bullying at all cost. As in with Lilith 3H, the price that comes with these actions are doubled.Trust me on this, I have seen a great deal of people who have Lilith 3H ended up paying for this.

Charm your pants off type beat. They love dirty talk and people who know what to say turn them on. They would whisper someone name and the other would start to blush. It doesn't even have to be in an intimate setting, something about the way they carry their words are so sensual and personal. In the bedroom, they love a good conversation as well as degrading using words. Compliment them and then drag their esteem to hell and watch them enjoy it a lil too much.

So good with their mouth😉But you didn't hear this from me.

Assert their dominance with words. They find it hilarious when others try to manipulate them. You really can't finesse the og manipulator. Will use your words again you and they'll do it so well you'll start questioning your own actions.

Somehow, these individuals lowkey appreciate honesty and loyalty so so much though. When they see someone who's a bit naive and perhaps even too straightforward, they find this very lovable and endearing. It's like a fresh air for them, seeing others having no front up. They fall for people who they deem as intellectually equal to them, if not higher (depends on how well they're managing that hidden god complex:) People who are real, who are adventurous with a hint of innocence win their hearts over.

I literally just remember this but i'd put an abuse trigger warning here ⚠️ It's also possible that with very dominant or harsh Lilith 3H aspects to personal placement, someone could have lied to these individuals and abused them when they were younger. (close families, peers&teachers at schools, neighbours) Some kind of similar events happened and this marks a defining point of their life. A complex relationship with confiding in others. They could not risk themselves getting used all over again. Serious trust issues.

They think honesty is a liability sometimes. I'd highly recommend people with harsh aspects to go into therapy, where they can freely say whatever they truly think&feel deep down without being judged.

These people will never stop knowing. Information is their power. Not just any information but things that can royally fuck someone life upside down. Scarier than they look.

So thats it for now guyssssss. I'm so glad I could stop procrastinating and work on some better content for you guys:) Cant wait to share more of my Lilith knowledge to ya😤

love,

saint jenx🪐

#astrology observations #astro notes #astrojenx #astrology #lilith #lilith in the 3rd house #lilith in the third house #lilith 3H #lilith in gemini #black moon lilith #lilith aspects #3rd house #third house #gemini #zodiac rants #astro basics #lilith in the houses #BML #3H lilith

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linkspooky · 4 years

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Shigaraki and Dabi

Heroes hurt their own families in order to help complete strangers. Words said by Shigaraki, and lived by Dabi. If you haven’t noticed, there’s quite a lot of parallels between the two of them. Especially their childhood selves, dark haired hero hopefuls whose hair turned white due to stress and eventually fell and became villains. They were the children closest to the heroes, the son of Endeavor, the grandson of Nana Shimura, and yet both of them fell through the cracks the hardest. Let’s talk about the foiling of these two, under the cut.

1. Father Says No

Both Shigaraki and Dabi are characters who grew up in a strict, patriarchical household where the father was the head of the household and determined all the rules.

The Shimura household was built by Koutarou, who held all the money, and therefore determined all the rules. The same can be said for the Todoroki household, which only came into being to fuel Enji’s ambitions. This is something Enji literally thinks, his first priority when having children was not to love and raise them, but to raise heirs that would carry on his quirk and make up for the weakness in it.

Enji also literally used his financial wealth and status to pressure her family into arranging a marriage. In the households, the patriarch is the ultimate authority and cannot be questioned. Koutarou sets the rules of the household because he has all the money. Endeavor sets the rules of the household because these children are there to be his heirs. Toya and Tenko both break the rules in their father’s households in some way and become scapegoats.

Ironically, they break the rules in opposite ways. Tenko, because he wants to become a hero.

Toya, because his flawof the flames being too harsh for his flame constitution and burning his own skin makes him unable to become a hero and carry on his father’s legacy.

Quick tangent to explain what I mean with Toya. This is speculation, because we haven’t been shown the exact details, so feel free to point and laugh at me if I’m wrong. Endeavor says (incorrectly) that if Toya had reached his goal for him, that all of his pent up negative emotions would have disappeared just like that. (They wouldn’t.)

Which means, Endeavor once again projected himself on his child. Toya was supposed to fix all Endeavor’s hurt feelings for him. So, when Toya failed at the training. When Toya wasn’t good enough. When Toya was flawed.

Which means it’s likely, Toya went in Endeavor’s mind from being the one who could carry his dreams, to being the one that Endeavor could scapegoat to blame for his negative emotions. Which meant, at some point he tossed Toya aside. At that point he started treating Toya differently. Toya probably pushed himself more and more to try to go back to the way things used to be, which is probably why his hair turning white, he started to crawl to Natsu every day.

There’s also a lot of similiarities and differences between their households.

Enji wanted his children to be born heroes. Koutarou’s rule was no heroes allowed.

Shimura and Toya both had a sibling they would run to and confide in. For Shimura it was Hana, and for Toya it was Natsu.

Shimura Tenko is the youngest sibling in the household. While Touya Todoroki was the oldest.

On the surface, the Shimura household seems more comfortable than the Todoroki household. Shimura receives a lot of comfort from his other relatives, his grandparents, his mother, his sister. However, none of them really confronted the problem in the household and at the end of the day Tenko was still getting beaten.

The Todoroki household also doesn’t seem like it was a place of much comfort for Toya. It really does seem from flashbacks that all he had to confide in when things started going wrong was Natsu (again feel free to taunt me cruelly if I’m wrong).

So, you have Tenko who is quietly and gently denied by his family, and Toya who suffers all alone in his household, either getting beaten himself, pushing himself too hard in training, or hearing his father beat his mother and Shoto.

However for both of them, it’s a gradual accumulation over time. The stress of the household overtakes them. Their hair turns from its original dark coloring to white from the sheer stress of it alone. They, as children, are made to bear the stress of their entire unhealthy household, because they are the scapegoat.

Endeavor genuinely believes that if Toya had somehow lived up to his promise he would never have turned abusive.

Kotaro believes that it was Tenko who was upsetting the peace of the household, because he would just not stop it with the hero talk.

They both soak up all this stress until it explodes outward. However, the incidents that turned them from Tenko -> Shigaraki, and from Toya -> Dabi are entirely different.

Toya committed what was essentially a suicide. He either staged his own death, or failed at his own suicide and survived. Tenko didn’t kill himself, he killed everyone else around him. Shigaraki destroyed the household that was denying him.

To simplify the manner in which they lash out. Touya destroys himself, Tenko destroys other people, especially the ones he believes are oppressing him or his friends.

Well you say, Dabi is trying to take down endeavor. However, Dabi still sees Endeavor and himself as one in the same. His flames are Endeavor’s flames.

One last thing, Dabi and Shigaraki are both marked by their father’s abuse. Dabi was burned by Endeavor’s flames. Dabi literally lives with third degree burns, looking like a living zombie. Then makes his burns even worse by using his flames in the self destructive manner Endeavor taught him.

Not only does Shigaraki still carry the lip and eye scars from being beaten up with a gardening tool, but Kotaro’s hand reaching out to his face is a symbol that Shigaraki keeps on him literally to this day by wearing a hand over his face constantly.

2. Friendship and Ideals

So I think all the subtle differences in their backgrounds is what leads to them expressing themselves differently as adults. There are several similarities between them, but I think hardcore Shigaraki fans can tell you all the reasons they prefer Shigaraki, and hardcore Dabi fans can do the same with Dabi.

I think a lot of it has to do with their relationships to their families. Families define how you connect with other people.

Shigaraki was instructed to always keep his family close to him. He’s always confronting his own feelings about his family, his pain from his family, that’s why when he lashes out he also takes his own personal feelings and pushes them outwards. Shigaraki isn’t concerned with right or wrong, moreso, these are my feelings. I reject the society that rejects me. What Shigaraki is concerned first and foremost, is feelings. His own feelings of being rejected, and also the feelings of people who were rejected just like him.

Shigaraki is the heart of his group. He’s the person they all rally around, because they gave him a place of belonging. And, Shigaraki has also expressed several times murderous monster that he is that he cares about the individual feelings of those closest to him. I won’t let you trample on Twice’s feelings, his first thing to do when waking up is order the league to be close to him.

Unlike Dabi, we’ve also seen Shigaraki directly confront the feelings of his missing family once more. He forgives his sister, he tries to comfort his mom. He destroys his father again. He tells his family that he denies them. He tells his grandfather that he still hates her.

I would say that Shigaraki carries those feelings with him, while Dabi dissociates himself from his feelings.Shigaraki directly confronts those feelings because Shigaraki is the heart, feelings are what matter more to him.

Dabi has feelings, obviously. Dabi has feelings even if he processes them in a way that’s not easy and palatable. Everyone in fact has feelings (though sometimes I wish I didn’t). Everyone expresses things in their own way if not in the typical way.

Dabi is completely closed off in regards to his own feelings. He’s not like Shigaraki who is open enough about them he’ll tell his backstory to the whole league on the spot. In fact that’s another difference, the league generally knows Shigaraki’s issues, when they had no idea about Dabi’s.

When really there was no good reason not to tell them. What are they not going to be up for murdering the number one hero?

Friendship is a priority for Shigaraki. Individualism is a priority for Dabi.

Dabi’s feelings towards the league are a messed up jumble, but his behavior towards them is pretty consistent. He takes every oppurtunity he can to insist that he’s not a part of them, that they’re all crazy and he’s the only sane one, that he doesn’t care about their feelings. This can’t all be Dabi just being tsundere or whatever, it’s physical steps taken for Dabi to distance himself from others.

Dabi’s individual goals are more important than his connections to other people. Shigaraki has no distinct goal besides empty lashing out and therefore connects to people with similiar hurt feelings than his.

Remember, Dabi self destructs. It’s likely, Dabi sees himself as a martyr. An individual willing to burn himself to take down the society with him. He’s trying to die for some cause like stain.

So before I develop on this tangent one more difference in similarity between them. Shigaraki’s family is dead. He can’t really do anything but carry on their feelings with him. Tomarau means, to mourn.

Dabi on the other hand, his family is still alive.He could have before the whole killing spree just shown up on their front doorstep. The reason he hasn’t, is because he can’t forgive Endeavor’s sin.

Whatever pushed him this far, whether it be a strong sense of justice, or a desire for personal revenge. Dabi values that, more than he values his connections with other people, even his own family who is still alive. This is once again the complex way Dabi handles his feelings, it’s likely he pushes his family away, the same way he pushes the league away and doesn’t process them. That’s why he says I thought about it so much I went crazy. He just insists he doesn’t care, and doesn’t think instead. Shigaraki lives constantly confronting his own feelings, Dabi lives by avoiding them.

Dabi is impersonal, aloof, and only ever thinks of himself as an individual. He will cooperate with others if it suits his needs, but the bond of the league hasn’t quite reached him yet. There’s a consequence for this.

So twice dying was Hawks fault. Because Hawks you know, stabbed him.

However you could say, Dabi’s planning centering all around himself, and what he can accomplish as an individual, meant he failed to accomplish that Twice might get hurt as a result of him letting Hawks into the league as a Spy. It’s an unintended consequence, but still a consequence.

Dabi showed up to save Twice but couldn’t. Then afterwards Dabi uses Twice’s death in the most gratuiotious way possible. Dabi insists once again he doesn’t care, that he never cared about Twice except as a tool that would have made fighting the heroes a lot easier.

Shigaraki destroys everything around him. He destroys for the sake of the people around him. Dabi destroys himself, his own feelings, he self destructs. When people get caught up in his flames they’re sacrifices for his cause.

Their priorities and the way they lash out are different. Dabi cares more for ideals than people. Shigaraki cares more for people than ideals.

However, they don’t have to destroy each other. Shigaraki trusts Dabi. Shigaraki of all the members of the league (with Toga as well) is the heart, is the best at sympathizing with the pain of other people because he is constantly in pain himself.

Dabi made a mistake and as a result Twice got killed. He gambled with too high of circumstances. Twice let a secret slip and invited the heroes to the League’s compound. Twice brought Chisaki for a meeting and because of that Magne died. This kind of scenario has happened before. Of course Dabi insists that his motivations were less pure than Twice’s, he didn’t care what happened to the rest of the league as long as he got the dirt he wanted for his big reveal.

I’m not suggesting that Dabi is secretly a sweetheart, or a misunderstood angsting teddy bear. Just that Dabi is currently closed off from all of his feelings, that’s why he denies too the feelings of people around him and their attempts to reach out for him. Dabi has refused the compansionship of the league.

It doesn’t have to be like this. Characters can develop. Shigaraki especially has been shown to reach out to people multiple times. Kurogiri is fond of him. Himiko and Twice in their moment of weakness, are convinced to stay on Shigaraki’s side because he shows their face to them. Spinner basically questioned why he was even staying with the league at his lowest point when he thought they had no reason to be there, and it was Shigaraki who he found his cause in.

Dabi is lacking something. He’s burned off and emotionally stunted his ability to develop connections with other people.

Shigaraki is lacking something. He is, again and again, told that he needs a plan besides destroy everything. Shigaraki is very observant of the world, and understands the truth, but he can’t get people to listen. Unlike Dabi who planned to such an extent, that he literally made a live public broadcast to turn public opinion against Endeavor because that was more important than winning a fight.

It’s true Dabi and Shigaraki could turn against each other, because Dabi doesn’t value people, because Shigaraki considers his lashing out more important than his ideals. They could also be the ones to balance each other out. We’re at an important turning point now, Dabi can either break off from the league now that his individual mission is compelte, or he can finally be reached by the league.

I think Shigaraki might reach him, because even though they’re grown up so differently they started in the exact same place. They were both boys who wanted to be heroes, and just wanted one person to tell them it was okay, that they could be heroes too.

#shigaraki tomura #shimura tenko #dabi #todoroki touya #todoroki toya #league of villains #league of villains meta #mha meta #my hero academia #my hero academia meta #my hero academia theory #bnha 291 #bnha 291 spoilers #lov meta #league of found family #todoroki family

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myherowritings · 4 years

Text

hearts intertwined | t.s.

— You and Todoroki have been roommates for months now but have barely had more than a two minute conversation. When quarantine hits and everyone is on lockdown, you find yourself forced to spend more time with him and actually end up...enjoying it?

pairing: todoroki shouto x reader word count: 3,055 genre: roommate au, pro hero!shouto, fluff warnings: suggestive content, 16+, mc and todo are both mid-20s

a/n: this is written as part of the crackhead sanctuary’s server collab! (pls excuse my server name lmfdkgfdg i have terrible naming skillz) i hope y’all enjoy and pls lmk what u think!! xx sof

In many ways, Todoroki Shouto was the perfect roommate.

He cleaned up after himself, always made an extra serving of food and set it aside for you (though it may only have been because he sucked at measuring out ingredients rather than him intentionally planning on leaving you leftovers), and generally kept his volume to a minimum when entering the apartment at ungodly hours of the night.

There was also the fact that he was the most attractive person you had ever shared a living space with in your life, and seeing him shirtless on his way to his bedroom from the bathroom was a definite bonus.

But despite all that, he was never someone you considered yourself close to.

You needed help paying for rent and expenses and he happened to be a friend of a friend of a friend who was looking for a place in the city to stay. Call it a divine intervention, a gift from the gods, or even fate… But you still wouldn’t consider yourself his friend.

It wasn’t as if you didn’t want to befriend him--Todoroki seemed like a sweet person. It was more along the lines of neither of you having the time. While you spent most of your day in the lab studying and doing research, Todoroki was always working in his office or out in the field to fulfill his new hero duties.

This quarantine was probably the first opportunity either of you had to be in the same building for more than thirty minutes at a time. Which was why, as the two of you sat side-by-side on the living room sofa, no one knew exactly what to say.

“So, the weather--”

“Looks warm out--”

Both of you opened your mouths and shut them at the same time.

“Sorry,” Todoroki said with a small smile. “You first.”

“I-- Oh… It was nothing,” you managed, clearing your throat in an attempt to compose yourself. “Just trying to make some small talk.”

With a tight-lipped smile and wide eyes, you slowly craned your head away from his view. Who admits they’re trying to make small talk? That breaks all the rules of how to properly talk to someone.

The faint sound of the television playing old infomercials buzzed in the background while you and your roommate sat in silence. You never struggled to talk to him during those brief moments of passing, so why now?

Looking at the screen to pass time, you noticed an outdated commercial of an older Tamagotchi game playing and felt yourself breaking out into a grin.

“Aw, I miss that game!” you cried as you turned to Todoroki with an excited glint in your eye. “Don’t tell anyone, but in elementary school I used to play it in class and since I was such a goody two-shoes, the teacher never suspected a thing.”

He raised an eyebrow in response. “I see we have ourselves a rebel in disguise here.”

“It’s our little secret, though. To everyone else, I am the epitome of innocence.”

You couldn’t help but notice the way his gaze travelled down your body and lingered on where the fabric of your oversized pajama shirt stopped and the expanse of your thigh started.

“Sure. I believe you,” he said in what was almost a teasing tone.

You felt your face growing hot but you paid it no mind.

“As you should,” you sniffed, crossing one leg over the other haughtily. When he chuckled, you turned back to him. “How about you? Are you a secret bad boy who played with his Tamagotchi in the back of class?”

Todoroki shook his head. “I never had one. I actually never even knew what it was until high school, I think.”

“Really?” Your eyes widened. Sure, the hand-held game was marketed to girls, but to never have heard about it through your whole childhood? You weren’t sure how that was possible. “Not even your older sister had one?”

Now, you didn’t know much about his personal life (whether or not he was dating someone, if he slept on the left or the right side of the bed, which leg he put in his pants first, et cetera), but you did pick up on a few things about his siblings from the previous interactions you’ve had with him.

“Not to my knowledge,” he said, looking away thoughtfully. “My father never afforded us such luxuries.”

You frowned. “What about toys like Pokemon? Oh! Or Yu-Gi-Oh cards?”

“Yu-Gi-Oh cards?” repeated Todoroki slowly, as if he was unsure what you were talking about.

Your jaw dropped in disbelief. “You never played--? Oh, never mind. How about family games like Twister or Just Dance?”

As far as you were aware, Todoroki Shouto came from a rather affluent family. So it was a wonder why he never participated in at least one of these experiences that characterized a whole generation’s childhood.

Again, he shook his head. “Never did those either. I wasn’t exactly allowed to play with my siblings, let alone other kids my age. My father always made me prioritize my training.”

“That’s not right of him.”

You winced. Of course he never had the opportunity to have a “normal” childhood. How could you be so insensitive? It was no secret Endeavor had a troubled relationship with his family, but you weren’t exactly sure to what extent. You didn’t focus much on the whimsical world of heroes and, ever since you were a child, you know you wanted to pursue the field of research rather than use your quirk. The lives of heroes--even top ranking ones--was something you never paid much attention to. Still, even you have heard some gossip about the estranged Endeavor.

“Sorry for pressing you,” you said, toying with the hem of your shirt. “I didn’t mean to be so insensitive.”

He gave you a nonchalant shrug and a small smile to let you know it was okay.

“Don’t worry about it, Y/L/N. You didn’t mean to,” he comforted. “Besides, it’s been a long time. It would be useless to hold a grudge against my father for this long.”

You tilted your head to the side. “Forgiveness, huh? That’s very mature of you, Todoroki. I think I admire you.”

His shoulders moved upward in silent laughter. “Thank you. I admire you, too.”

Ignoring the faint heat you felt in your cheeks, you beamed. “Thanks. Anyway-- You know what I just realized?”

“What?”

“You did not have a childhood.”

While his face remained passive, you could have sworn you saw his eye crinkle in amusement.

“I suppose I can’t argue with that,” he said in agreement. “My youth was spent quite differently than most.”

You nodded profusely. “Right. And while I don’t think there is anything inherently wrong with that, per se, it could be beneficial to do these things you haven’t had the chance to!”

He examined you curiously as you bounced up from your seat on the sofa with an excited grin. After a few moments of silence, he craned his neck, prompting you for clarification.

“You’re bored on lockdown, I’m bored on lockdown,” you stated matter-of-factly. “What better time to reclaim your childhood than now?”

Todoroki didn’t bother to hide the small smile making its way across his face at your determined words. “Okay, then. Count me in.”

- - - - -

When you decided you wanted to help your new friend Todoroki reclaim his childhood, you expected your days to be full of cute Beanie Babies and Webkinz, as well as the presumed amounts of chaos that followed edible bubbles and candy kits. And while the first few days of the week consisted of that, the tone changed rather drastically when a certain game was introduced. Of all things, what you expected least was to be practically panting on top of Shouto as you braced your muscles and tried not to collapse onto him.

“Left hand, blue,” he called after flicking the spinner.

How he managed to turn the spinner with one hand and keep his body balanced with the other on a Twister mat without toppling over was a mystery to you.

Stupid heroes with their stupid, bulging muscles, you thought crossly as you relived your many previous losses. You tried to ignore the bead of sweat dripping down your face as you struggled to stay up.

Somehow, you turned your head just enough that you had the perfect view of Todoroki’s flexed triceps as he held himself in a modified pushup position of sorts. There was a look of concentration on his face and, while you found his furrowed brows to be rather cute, you still couldn’t help but focus your attention on his arms. He had a lean type of muscle that you thought would feel especially comfortable wrapped around your waist--

“Y/L/N, do you forfeit?”

You blinked, feeling lightheaded both from this game which you lacked the stamina for and from the lack of oxygen that travelled to your brain as you held your breath while staring at Todoroki.

Once your mind processed his words, you huffed. “Forfeit! Me? Never! Why would you think that?”

“Because I called ‘left hand, blue,’ minutes ago and you still haven’t moved.”

Blood rushed to your face and you were thankful you had the exertion to blame it on. It wasn’t your fault Todoroki’s arms were so toned and strong and...distracting.

“No,” you said, unsure if there was even a question asked for you to reply to. “I don’t quit!”

Your eyes scanned the mat feverishly, looking for a blue circle to place your left hand on that would cause the least amount of strain. Shouto had already won the first two rounds and you’d be damned if you were to let him win again. (As much as you loved witnessing him succeed, your pride would simply be too hurt if you lost a third time in a row.)

“Find a spot yet?” he asked in amusement. “I’m not sure how much longer my arms can hold.”

Of course, just the mention of his arms drew your attention from finding the optimal Twister position to staring stupidly at his triceps again.

As you attempted to tear your gaze away from him, you spotted hints of a smirk lingering on Todoroki’s face.

Did he notice your staring? There was no way…

You looked at him, wide-eyed and dubious, and almost choked when you saw his shoulders start to shake as he tried to hide his laughter.

His laugh was muffled by his shirt in an attempt to keep his volume down, but it still rang rich and deep in the air. It was the first time you heard him laugh like that and you wanted to do anything to hear it again.

With a shake of his head, he removed his hands from their spot on the Twister board and sat upright beside you.

“I concede,” he said when he saw you eyeing him with curiosity. “You win this round. My arms were getting too sore.”

After hearing the sweet sound of Todoroki saying, “You win,” you let yourself collapse on the floor, rolling onto your back to get a clear view of your cream-colored ceiling.

“For some reason, I sincerely doubt that your arms were getting sore,” you said, stretching your own--genuinely sore--arms out in front of you. “But seeing as I was about to fall flat on my face if I waited any longer… Thank you for conceding.”

“Doubt I’d be sore?” he repeated, craning his neck to peer down at your face. He placed his left hand on his right bicep and gently massaged it with his thumb and forefinger. “What for?”

By then, whatever rational thought was left in your brain had been fully replaced by Shouto’s arms and Shouto’s arms only, and you couldn’t even complain.

“Mmm, what did you say again?” You blinked, clearing your throat. You suddenly had the desire to chug a cool glass of water.

Todoroki’s only reply was another small--almost imperceptible--smirk. It would have been easy for someone to miss, but to you, someone who was perhaps being more attentive to their roommate and newfound friend than they’d care to admit, it was clear as day.

“You’re totally messing with me!” you groaned, covering your face with your hands as you continued to lie with your back on the floor. “Aren’t you?”

He let out a breathy laugh and shrugged, the corners of his lips quirking upwards. “Sorry. It’s just cute seeing your reactions. I didn’t know you liked my arms so much.”

You could’ve sworn he flexed once more for dramatic effect and an indignant squeak escaped your mouth.

“I-I don’t!” you protested, making sure to look anywhere but his arms. “I just never noticed how...proportionate they were before! Just thinking about how da Vinci would admire them. For scientific purposes, of course.”

“Sure.”

You gaped at the knowing look on his face. “How did you even notice? Aren’t you a bit of the oblivious type?” With wide eyes, you slapped your hand over your mouth. “Wait-- I’m sorry. That was rude to say.”

Todoroki waved it off with a smile to show he wasn’t offended in the slightest. “I guess I was rather oblivious in the beginning of high school. But as I grew up I became more accustomed to picking up on such things.”

You hummed in silent contemplation. Of course he had to have grown used to people making moon eyes over him. He probably got it all the time.

“I usually pay it no mind,” he continued as he stood up, peering down at you sprawled out on the floor. “But when you do it, I find it sort of cute.”

As if he didn’t just say something that caused your heart to skip a beat, Todoroki extended a hand out to help you up.

Ignoring the heat rushing to your cheeks, you gently placed your hand in his.

“Thanks,” you murmured as Shouto pulled you off the mat and towards his body, a feeling of lightheadedness overcoming you at the sudden motion.

One hand held yours while his other was placed firmly above your elbow to help you steady yourself.

“You okay, Y/L/N?” he asked, a hint of concern in his voice as he watched you regain your balance.

“Oh, yeah! No worries. This happens all the time, to be honest,” you admitted, vaguely taking note of how your chest was almost fully pressed against his. “Whenever I move my head too fast I get a bit dizzy. And whenever I stand too fast my knees sort of just crack.”

Your words did nothing to soothe the worried furrow between his brows.

“Is...Is that not normal?”

He blinked.

You grimaced. “Okay. Guess not. Maybe I need to work out more.”

“You can work out indoors with me,” Todoroki suggested with a small smile. He looked so sincere you were just about to agree until he opened his mouth for a second time-- “As long as you don’t spend the whole workout gawking at my arms.”

With an indignant cry, you pulled yourself away from his loose grip, face burning with such intensity you wouldn’t be surprised if he were able to sense the rise in temperature. “I never gawked at your arms.”

He hummed.

“Well, okay, maybe I did,” you relented with a huff, bending down to fold up the game mat in front of you. “They look very strong. Being a hero must be hard work.”

Todoroki shrugged, helping you clean up. “It’s worth the toll it takes. I can imagine your research requires hard work too.”

You tried to hide the look of surprise on your face. You briefly talked to him about what you did during the roommate-finding process, but you didn’t think it was anything interesting enough for him to recall. It brought an odd warmth to your stomach knowing he cared enough to remember.

“I guess. But I’d say it’s nowhere near as difficult as hero work,” you brushed off. “Not everyone has what it takes to be a good hero.”

A faint blush colored his cheeks as he followed you into the kitchen for a glass of water.

“There are lots of great heroes,” he stated, filling up two cups and handing one to you.

“Yeah, there are. And greatness is one thing, but you’re a good one-- In the heart.” Your gaze flitted to his, unsure why you were filled with the sudden urge to have such an intimate conversation after a game of Twister. Still, you rolled with it. “I know we haven’t talked much prior to this lockdown...but even I can tell how caring you are. And I’m looking forward to getting to know you more.”

A comfortable silence filled the air as he took a seat beside you. If Shouto was taken aback by your sudden compliment, he did a good job at hiding it, simply giving you a small smile as he let his shoulder rest against yours. You glanced over at the point of contact and bubbled with elation.

“Todoroki?” you called quietly, the edge of your pinky brushing against his.

He looked down at the gentle touch of your hand and didn’t move away. Instead, he took the initiative and placed his fingers on top of yours, his hand surprisingly soft despite the calluses on his fingertips. The back of your neck heated at the sudden movement, but you decided you rather liked how his hands felt on yours.

“Hmm?”

“Thanks for letting me drag you along to play these childhood games,” you said, letting out a sigh of contentment. “It’s a nice change of pace while we’re stuck indoors.”

Shouto shook his head. “I should be the one thanking you. These are much better childhood memories than the ones from my actual childhood,” he admitted with a light laugh. “I’m glad we had the opportunity to spend more time together, Y/L/N.”

By now your fingers were intertwined with his, his thumb lightly stroking the peak of your knuckle.

He continued, “I hope this continues even when quarantine is over.”

“I hope it does, too.” You couldn’t stop the grin from spreading wide across your face as you nuzzled your head on his shoulder. “Let’s keep making memories together, okay, Todoroki?”

“Happily.”

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icollectyoursins · 4 years

Text

Jotaro x Fem!Reader NSFW

Anon requested "Jotaro x fem reader. Size kink, praise kink, and maybe some bondage. Like Jotaro has her in his lap and hes loving how small she is and how he gets to take care of her and when things get spicy he's praising how well she takes him and stuff? He just ties her up and spoils her"

As a short person, I needed this. It’s like therapy.

Jotaro has finally taken a night off from his work allowing the two of you relax on the couch for the first time in a long while. But, what do you know? You’re really horny and he is more than happy to help you with that.

Wanna know what I’m willing to write? Rules here!

Have a character, but no idea? Prompt list here!

Looking for more? Master post here!

WARNINGS: Lots of kissing, praise, neck kisses, breast play/nipple play, lots of teasing, ropes appearing out of nowhere (totally not Star Platinum the World), fingering, riding, squirting, cumming on partner.

Word Count: 1432

You nuzzled into Jotaro’s neck, sighing happily as he rubs your back, holding you close. His warm hands trail over your thighs, silently remarking at how large his hands looked compared to them. He knew he was big, it was painfully obvious, but whenever he stood next to you he just felt an overwhelming sense of... love? Protectiveness? Whatever the feeling, it made a pleasant warmth spread over his body.

He gently kissed your temple, basking in the comfortable silence. You fit almost perfectly into his lap. How did he ever find someone like you? A soft hum rumbled throughout his body as you ran your hands through his soft, black locks. He pressed his face into your hair, inhaling your scent, soothing and so familiar to him.

A happy sigh passed over your lips as the two of you grew more and more relaxed, thankful for this day off. Or, at least it would be relaxing if you weren’t unreasonably horny. Every soft touch made your skin burn hot in the most pleasant way. His lips brushed against your skin, making you shiver. He hummed again, not caring about your reaction.

Jotaro continues to massage various parts of your body, soothing out any sore muscles you might have. You can’t help but shake in his touch, hoping he would get a little more rough, more handsy.

“Is everything okay?” He asks calmly, squeezing your thigh gently. Ass. So he knew what he was doing, great.

“F-fine.” You mumble into his neck. He chuckles softly.

“Are you lying?” A moment of silence. You were debating whether or not you wanted him to destroy you.

“Yeah.” You sounded defeated, hoping you would get the chance to rile him up so you wouldn’t have to ask. His lips graze across a sensitive part of your neck, causing you to shiver again. You feel him smile into your skin before placing a gentle kiss there. It was hard to fight back the moan that bubbled up in your throat.

Jotaro continued to gently kiss all over your neck, gradually coaxing more and more sweet sounds out of you. You can’t help but squirm in his arms as he teases you. Your reactions only amuse him, easily pinning you to his chest.

“Stop moving, let me take care of you,” his whisper sends chills down your spine. You nod your head. He easily lifts you up so you’re straddling him now, hands resting on your hips. His bright blue eyes stare into yours, full of love.

“Good girl.” You can’t deny the warmth that spreads directly to your core. Then, a little pushier than you’re used to, he smashes his lips into yours, quickly taking control.

His hands move to your front and up your torso, sliding to your arms, then pushing them behind you gently. He holds them behind your back with one hand while the other takes its place on your cheek. The kiss is broken slowly, his lips still hover over yours. Your arms are released, but you find that you still can’t move.

You let out a sound of confusion as you try to pull your arms apart. It’s impossible. Somehow, your arms have been tied together with rope. Practiced fingers quickly unbutton your shirt, opening it so your breasts are exposed. Wasting no time, he turns his attention there, littering them with kisses until he gets to your nipples. You’re thankful you decided to not wear a bra today, saving yourself a lot of time and probably money if he decided to rip it.

Jotaro takes one into his mouth, alternating between sucking and licking it. Your head falls back half in pleasure, half in relief, grateful for the feeling. You moan freely now, sighing when brings one of his hands up to your other breast, pinching the nipple.

“You’re so good, (Y/N). So beautiful.” He breathes praises into your skin, making you all the more desperate for him to touch you more. His hips roll up into you before he kisses you again. The feel of his bulge against you takes your breath away.

“Jotaro,” you pant, “I need you.”

You feel him shiver, then you’re lifted again. This time, you’re on your feet while he removes the rest of your clothes as well as his own. When he sits down, you’re pulled back into his lap, pressed into his chest. His lips return to your neck, nibbling gently while one of his hands dances down your body to your folds.

Diligent fingers spread you open, gliding down over your clit, making you gasp. He keeps you pinned to him with one arm while you squirm and moan in his ear. You feel him slide towards your entrance, teasing it with a few circles, before slowly slipping in. You cry out, head falling to his shoulder.

It’s a torturous pace. First, he would just barely push his finger into you, then pull out quickly to glide it up and down your folds, repeating the process over and over again. Gradually, he would go deeper, but it was still oh so slow. Jotaro hums, adoring every little sound you made.

“You’re such a good girl, (Y/N). Do you want more?” You can only whimper in reply. “You can take more, right?” As he talks, another finger prods at your entrance. You don’t even bother trying to hide the moan that passes over your lips as it stretches you out. He had some mercy this time, not putting you through the first pace. He’s still slow, but deep, touching every sweet spot he could reach.

Jotaro continues to stretch you open, adding a third finger with a squelch. The room is full of obscene noises coming from your mouth as well as your slick vagina. It takes everything in you to not cum as he finger fucks you. You breathe heavily against his neck, voice hoarse as you spoke.

“Jo-Jotarooo-” you don’t even get out the rest of the sentence. He pulls out his digits, wiping them on the fabric of the couch.

“I know, hold on.” He grabs your hips, positioning you over his long erection. Slowly, he lowers you onto him, praising you all the way, until you’ve taken him entirely. “Shh, shh, fuck. You’re so tight. Unf~ So good, that’s it. Almost- unh~”

You collapse onto his chest while he rubs his back, letting you get used to his cock. It doesn’t take long, you’ve had him fill you plenty of times before, plus he’s always diligent when preparing you. A kiss was placed on your shoulder before the grip on your hips gets a little harder and he starts gyrating his hips. The mewls that fall from your lips are downright shameful. It doesn’t matter how many times you’ve done this before, you’ll never get used to how good he feels.

It’s not long before you’re bouncing up and down on his length, babbling out incoherent sentences as he picks up the pace. Jotaro does the same, losing himself in the feeling of your warmth around him, pulling him in like a syphon.

“Fuck, you’re so good. You feel so fucking good- so fucking tight.” He groans into your ear. Suddenly, this position wasn’t working anymore and he quickly moves so you’re lying on the couch with him towering over top of you, never leaving his place between your legs.

“You take me so well, (Y/N). Uhn~ like you were ~ah! Made for me.” He’s not even sure what he’s saying anymore, but it seems to have the desired effect as you call out his name more, begging for him to go harder.

Heated kisses along with deep thrusts into you fill the next passing moment. You strain to keep your control, but the more he pushes into your sweet spots, the more you see stars. Your orgasm washes over you like a freight train, a broken cry accompanying it. You gush out around his cock, arching into him.

The feel of your walls contracting around you like a vice also pushes him over the edge. He pulls out quickly, painting your stomach with his release. You both pant, catching your breath. He leans over, littering your cheeks with kisses.

“You did so well, (Y/N). So well,” Tissues are used to clean up your stomach and slick cunt, then quickly discarded. The ropes are, of course, taken off. Any red marks are gently rubbed out by his warm hands. Jotaro swaps your positions, holding you close to him while you both continue to relax, enjoying your night together.

#jotaro kujo #jotaro kujo not sfw #jotaro kujo n/s/f/w #jotaro kujo n/sfw #jotaro not sfw #jotaro n/s/f/w #jotaro n/sfw #jotaro kujo x reader not sfw #jotaro kujo x reader n/s/f/w #jotaro kujo x reader #jotaro kujo x reader n/sfw #jotaro x reader #jotaro x reader not sfw #jotaro x reader n/s/f/w #jotaro x reader n/sfw #jojo part 3 #jjba part 3 #jotaro prompts #not sfw

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vampireinterview · 4 years

Text

It has come to my attention that some of you have not been made aware of the fact that Plato was well known for being a Destiel shipper, in addition to the fact that he also wrote some philosophical works on the side. Let me explain.

Plato was an Athenian thinker whose real name was Aristocles (Plato most likely comes from the Greek word for ‘broad”, he might have been so jacked that people nicknamed him for his wide shoulders, which is irrelevant to the topic at hand but I’m collecting receipts on my hypothesis that all hellers are physical beheamoths). His work regarding the philosophy of love can be interpreted through the lens of the Deancas love story, which can potentially lead us to discover the very essence of what makes Destiel so impactful and universal, so bear with me, I’ll make it as introductory as possible.

Plato’s Symposium is a dialogue which contains the philosopher’s basic view on what love can be. The influence of the aforementioned text has been so strong that even those of us who are blissfully unaware of its contents have heard of the concept of “platonic love”. It is with great disappointment that I have to inform you about the fact that the way in which the term is colloquially used can be considered quite removed from the core idea of what Plato’s love is supposed to be about. Commonly people utilize it to refer to a non-romantic and non-sexual emotion towards an individual. However, even though the extrasensory love was the end goal, it was never too far distanced from the earthly, carnal desire that was supposed to lay the foundation for greater experiences.

One of the most illustrative elements of the Symposium is no doubt the Love Ladder metaphor (also known as Diotima’s Ladder of Love, the Scala Amoris); Plato believes the act of loving to be a part of the process of initiation into the non-material world of ideas. Every step of the ladder helps one approach the transcendence of one’s soul, and so we can single out six steps to immortal absolutes:

1. The first step is developing an appreciation for a particular person. It’s a very much carnal (though not necessarily conventionally sexual) desire for beauty of a specific individual. According to Plato only through the love of the physical can one love the non material. The visceral infatuation with another’s body is often strongly rooted with the self-hatred of one’s own aesthetical poverty: within the carnal love we seek to find that which our own body lacks. The desire between Dean and Cas doesn’t have to be seen as strictly sexual, as the appreciation of beauty does not warrant a conventionally erotic subtext. This sort of fascination with the flesh is most noticeably highlighted in the many “eye sex” scenes in seasons 4-5, and is later brought up by Hester:

The very touch of you corrupts. When Castiel first laid a hand on you in Hell, he was lost.

2. The second step stems from the appreciation for all physicality derived directly from the love one has for the lover’s form. It’s fleshed out any time Dean finds beauty in the dark times, where he would have never found it before or when Cas sees humanity through the lens of the love he has for the beauty within Dean Winchester. This step is all about finding the allure in everybody, not in spite of but rather because of having fallen for a specific person’s material form.

3. The next step is a love which transcends the physical and teaches an individual to feel affection towards the souls. The attraction one can experience in relation to that which is non material is precisely what takes the function of the driving force behind both Castiel’s and Dean’s decisions in season 6 and onward (arguably even much earlier for Cas? or even Dean? Maybe we’re talking about season 4?). As evidenced by the apparent lack of attraction Dean experiences towards Jimmy himself, he must have already moved on to this stage (the Cas he loves is not just the vessel he inhabits). Castiel on the other hand feels heavily infatueted with Dean’s spiritual allure (even when he’s physically on the verge of a breakdown, he’s still beautiful, still Dean Winchester).

4. It is only then that one can find love for the institution. If one worships souls, then one also has to worship the product of those souls: and, sure enough, loving humanity led Castiel to love its structures and ethical systems and be willing to die fighting for them. In the later seasons he exhibits fascination over all the little rules that guide an average human’s life (which is especially fleshed out in his season 7 dialogues, where he contemplates all the small details of the societal structure, ie: how important is lipstick to you?, maybe the human institutions should ban its production). Same can be said of Dean: the customs and traditions of other people are subject to his affectionate protection in the later seasons, which sets s6 and onwards Dean apart from the early seasons Dean who cared mostly about his blood relatives. The found family arc was for him a process of growing attached to the order of life which was previously foreign to him, and him learning to navigate functioning within a big family structure and an organization (the last one is physically manifested by his move from a chaotic life spent at random motels to living at the bunker, property of the institution of Men Of Letters).

5. Then comes the deep appreciation of knowledge. Now, it is widely disputed whether what Plato meant should be strictly narrowed down to just one kind of knowledge (in many English translations you might encounter the word ‘science’, though used in the ancient sense). The process of gaining knowledge is often equated with the understanding of ideas in Plato’s work, therefore we’re going to stick with that. The act of loving the process of discovering both the external and the internal world is a strong factor which pushes Dean to self examination, or the examination of the inner psyche. It is that pursuit of knowledge that is the very coronation of his entire character arc: the realization of his role within the story (”I’m not the ultimate killer”) which was directly derived from the act of loving Cas.

6. The final stage of platonic love is reaching the love of the very concept of Love. Once again, interpretations vary, but for the sake of the argument, I’ll clarify that: the discussed kind of love transcends both the body and the soul. An individual is in love with Beauty, not just one of it’s physical or spiritual manifestations. In my opinion, this stage is extremely well depicted during the 15x18 confession scene, for it is a kind of love achieved by Castiel. He is no longer just in love with the body or soul of Dean, he’s also in love with the sole idea of loving him. He quite literally states that he’s fallen in love with the idea of just being, just saying it, just falling in love.

Upon achieving this state, he transcends his material conditions both by leaving the human world (his move to another dimension - the Empty - could be just an illustrative manifestation of the transcendental move of his essence) and giving birth to a new world order. The way in which he later on goes to rebuild Heaven and give birth to a completely new, structure of the universe is in line with a concept that Plato ties into the finale step of the Ladder - pregnancy of the soul. At one point in Symposium he describes Diotima saying that:

That in that life alone, when he looks at Beauty in the only way that Beauty can be seen--only then will it become possible for him to give birth not to images or virtue (Because he’s in touch with no images), but to true virtue (Because he is in touch with the true Beauty).

What is the christian equivalent and personification of the true idea of Virtue if not the abstract concept of Heaven? The moment Cas creates a new portrayal of Virtue he finishes the Ladder. It could also be argued that the true pregnancy of the soul was actually finished when Jack ascended to the status of God: an entity which belongs to the realm of ideas and is perfect by its very nature is birthed through Castiel’s love (which can be traced back to the feelings he has for Dean Winchester).

And it is the fact that Dean’s arc got stuck on the fifth stage of the Ladder that causes me so much pain. He dies before transcending and experiencing the non-temporal and non-relative feeling of love that one can gain only through the admiration of beauty itself. His life was cut short and his soul has already left the mortal, physical world, therefore he is forever unable to experience the feeling of loving Love and Virtue so much that his soul gives birth to an unbreakable idea.

In conclusion: if you ever see somebody say that Dean and Castiel’s relationship is platonic, just agree. It is very much so platonic in the sense that through their carnal and spiritual desires they’ve manged to (nearly, in Dean’s case) transcend their material conditions and reached the divine aspect of ideal Beauty and Virtue, rooted in a love that’s so deep that it’s perfectly able to redefine the structure of one’s existence.

tagging some people who have vaguely expressed interest in acquiring the third eye:

@cryptcas @futureheadnerd @doctorprofessorsong @sinnabonka @theangelwiththewormstache @absoluteheller @fivefeetfangirl

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a-clockwork-justice · 3 years

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Everything I Love About Loser Geek Whatever

So, not too long ago, it was the third birthday of Loser Geek Whatever. Yes, I know the single was released on November 30th 2018 and its considered the song’s official birthday, but the 26th July three years ago was the first showing of the 2018 Off-Broadway revival of Be More Chill and the first time Loser Geek Whatever was shown to the world in any capacity. Therefore, I consider that day to be the song’s unoffical birthday and I’ve been waiting to write down everything I love about it so here I am. (This was originally gonna be posted on the 26th July but I can’t make anything concise so it took longer than that).

I’ve gone on and on about what Loser Geek Whatever means to me personally, how a slew of random chance introduce me to it, got me deep into Be More Chill, introduced me to 90% of my current friends, and overall up-ended my whole life, but now it’s time to dissect the song itself and why it’s so great. As much as I adore Loser Geek Whatever, it could’ve easily been any other song that threw me down a rabbit hole and that I could’ve latched onto- no, wait, it couldn’t have been, because Loser Geek Whatever is unique in that way. I did about a year of music at A-Level so I’m gonna delve into some of the technical aspects here too. I’m chronicling this mostly for myself so I am going as deep as I see fit because this song is a treasure hiding yet more treasures. If you happen to love Loser Geek Whatever as much as I do, this’ll be your goldmine.

So, grab a snack my fellow fans, because here’s a comprehensive list of everything to love about Loser Geek Whatever in roughly chronological order. Long post incoming:

The song starts off strong from the first millisecond - I don’t know what instrument(s) they used but just listen to the single version again - that opening chord blares at you like a siren. It calls for your attention, screaming this is incredibly important, and indeed it is. That chord, an F chord, has no indication as to whether it’s major or minor - it’s just the tonic F with its dominant C and another tonic F above it. In other words, it’s unresolved, it hangs in the air. From a narrative standpoint, Jeremy is at a crossroads, torn between giving into the SQUIP or staying loyal to Michael, and the music paints this. It has the same effect on both the single and album versions - I always hold my breath as it holds, it’s the gap in this crucial transition for Jeremy between who he was and him becoming something he isn’t.

To continue the thread of musical painting, the melody line contains the accidental E-flat which doesn’t belong to the key of F major. This once again illustrates Jeremy’s uncertainty, but there’s more - the whole introduction is a slowed-down version of the Apocalypse of the Damned theme from Two Player Game, arguably the point in the show when Michael and Jeremy’s relationship was at its strongest. Jeremy’s recalling everything he had with Michael, but the slowing down of the melody shows hesitancy, along with highlighting the accidental E flat. These latter points of course aren’t unique to Loser Geek Whatever - they’re also in the section of Upgrade that twins with Loser Geek Whatever. I’m just laying out why they work so well.

I’m glad I waited until after I saw the show in London to finish writing this - I’m something of a Loser Geek Whatever purist, as made clear by my ire at them cutting it in half and tacking the end of Upgrade back on for the London version. I still enjoyed the show in London though and I’m glad I knew about this change ahead of time, because they did change something about the song that I think really worked - they added two notes in the bass to each bar, like heartbeats, which once again signifies Jeremy’s uncertancy and the importance of this major turning point.

It’s been firmly established by this point that Jeremy is a loser and he knows it. He doesn’t want to be a hero, he just wants to survive, but there’s a difference between that and feeling “inconsequential.” Jeremy is basically admitting that, in his eyes, it doesn’t matter to the world or anyone except Michael if he even survives or not. He’s not just a loser, or a geek - he’s a whatever, with no one caring who he is. And he’s felt this way for years - since middle school began. He’s now in his Junior year of high school - that’s five years of being in this state of being unnoticed at best and picked on at worst. He’s “the one who’s left out”. With just one little line, hell, one word, we’re given more layers as to why he so badly wants to change that.

Moving from the first verse to the chorus, we start to see Jeremy’s attitude shift, from being sad to being angry - he’s frustrated, resentful that he’s spent so long in this state (A lot of people have made similar comparisons about Will Roland’s Jeremy as a whole in relation to Will Connolly’s Jeremy and I think this song exemplifies that). He doesn’t deserve to feel this horrible - not now and certainly not for the next two years until he and Michael can be “cool in college.” When you think about it, what options does he really have? He could either give into the SQUIP or reject it and go back to where he was, still miserable and lonely. Yes, he has Michael and Michael is an amazing, kind, loyal best friend, but as many have pointed out, he’s also dismissive of Jeremy’s feelings of inadequacy whether he means to be or not, which only made Jeremy feel more lonely. Should Jeremy just expect to feel better about himself at some point before college? He’s waited for years, why would that happen at any other point?

More layers baby! Second verse, Jeremy rants on about his father’s advice about following his own instincts and how it’s gotten him nowhere he wants to be. Come to think of it, Michael’s advice about staying the same and waiting for their environment to change can be seen as similar - it’s arguably easier for Michael as he has two loving mothers who undoutably give him plenty of positive reinforcement. Meanwhile, Jeremy’s mother has left them, which likely instilled further feelings of not being good enough, and his father has fallen apart to the point where he can’t even put pants on, let alone step up to take care of his son, meaning that Jeremy likely isn’t going to take his advice very seriously, especially after it’s failed him so thoroughly. But to Jeremy, the problem isn’t necessarily the advice itself - it’s that it’s being followed by him. So now he’s going to turn around and put his life and every choice in something else’s hands, even if - no, especially if it goes against his own instincts. It still doesn’t feel quite right, it “feels bizarre”, but it’s getting him somewhere, so it has to be right in the most meaningful capacity, and to Jeremy, the “most meaningful capacity” is any capacity that isn’t his own.

Now the best line - the one about being a “normal, handsome guy”. Let’s get this on the table - Jeremy is trans. Will Roland himself said that he often thinks of the show’s young trans fans when he sings that line. Naturally, societal transphobia plus gender dysphoria would have a pretty catestrophic effect on the self-esteem of any growing teenager, even more so one in Jeremy’s situation for the reasons I’ve just laid out. He’s probably missed out on a lot of things that “normal” guys take for granted, with most girls barely looking in his direction, let alone in any positive manner. Jeremy’s own sexuality aside, it’s mostly society, and the SQUIP by extension, that considers scoring with girls to be a “manly” or masculine activity, and through Brooke treating him as dateable material, Jeremy feels better about fitting into society’s rules of how a man should be and act. This isn’t the only reason he feels good about Brooke finding him attractive, of course, but it’s just another layer that Jeremy sees more value in conforming to how society says he should be rather than in how he actually is.

I know I just said that the last point was about the best line, but honestly, there’s more than one best line in this song. The bridge is where we start to see Jeremy’s language becoming more technologically inclined - “prompt”, “command” and “bandwidth” are all terms used in computing and used to show how Jeremy is likening himself, or his intentions, to a computer, effectivly merging himself and his SQUIP into one entity and Jeremy willingly giving over his own individuality.

And HERE, we get to the kicker. I’ve talked a lot about layers throughout this whole essay, about themes and motifs building on each other. Jeremy is essentially peeling back the layers of his own situation and only finding reason after deeper reason after deeper reason as to why he should follow the SQUIP and not be a loser anymore. Now, he hits the core, the seed, the crux of it all - “The problem has ALWAYS BEEN ME!!” Everything he is, everything that makes Jeremy Heere himself, is and has always been wrong. This line is a gut punch and EVERYONE knows it - the performer always takes a few seconds to let it sink in before continuing.

As an aside, I wanna mention the differences between the single and the album versions of the bridge. The album version starts of quieter after the vocalising of the last chorus, and builds up to the climactic final line, while the single version is loud all the way through but gets even louder and punchier at the end. Both are good, but I personally prefer the single version - the album sounds like Jeremy is broken and desperate and on the verge of tears as he reaches his inevitable but ugly realisation. The single is also desperate, but it’s pleading and all-consuming and a THOUSAND times more powerful, I get chills every time I hear it. (Side note, the London version starts of loud like the single and ends quieter like the album, almost as if Jeremy is reluctant to admit what he truly believes about himself, and it’s easy to see why, it’s a damn harsh condemnation).

“Take a breath and get prepared” - Jeremy sings to both himself and the audience. The first half has been heavy and we need a breather. Yet just before he goes over the brink, he has second thoughts. His conscience, his own voice in his head, breaks through, warning him that his choice will have consequences for other people than himself. People will get hurt - Michael most of all. Not just by Jeremy ditching him; here’s something else - when Jeremy is the “cool dude”, he might end up being a bully to those who are losers just like him, cutting them down just as Rich’s SQUIP made Rich do to him. Who would be the perfect target for Jeremy’s potential future bullying? His former best friend and fellow loser, Michael Mell. It’s pretty damn likely that if the SQUIP hadn’t optic nerve blocked Michael, it would’ve told Jeremy to pick on him, and even though Michael has ostensibly been pretty good at brushing these things off before, the takedowns would hurt a LOT more coming from his former best friend - and we know this because IT ACTUALLY HAPPENS, granted without the SQUIP influencing Jeremy directly (also let’s just clear up that just because the SQUIP wasn’t on doesn’t mean its influence on Jeremy hadn’t disappeared - that’s not how emotional abuse works).

Twelve years of loyal friendship, of borderline unhealthy codependency … can he throw all that away for Christine, a girl he’s thus admired from afar and is only just starting to get to know as a person? Moreover, even if Jeremy gets Christine, what about himself, who he wants to be? He just wants to be something other than himself because he thinks that anything is better but … what? The cool dude, the hero or … whatever. He’ll take anything because he’s that desperate, but what about when he gets it? Will he finally be satisfied? Will it be worth failing his one real friend, an act so scummy that the only way he could possibly stomach it would be to somehow pretend he hadn’t done it?

But none of those questions matter to Jeremy now - he’s fully gaslit into believing that every thought and inclination that comes from himself is wrong and shouldn’t be followed. He needs to sync up with the SQUIP and the rest of the world and mute his own defective inner voice. When you think about it, the relationship between Jeremy and the SQUIP is one of the most intense abusive relationships ever put to fiction - we’ve seen emotional abuse and brainwashing before, but here, Jeremy is literally preventing from THINKING the wrong way because the SQUIP can detect his every thought. See what I mean when I say that doesn’t go away when the SQUIP turns off for a few minutes?!

Throughout all of this is the undercurrent of Jeremy wanting to get better. He’s been trying so hard for so long to have a better life, but nothing has worked. Not listening to his dad, not trying to get closer to Christine through theatre, and certainly not listening to Michael’s advice to wait until college. Why should he resign himself to even more time being miserable with no end in sight? After all, being cool in college isn’t a guarantee. After all he’s been through, it’s his turn to finally be cool, after an eternity of being someone he doesn’t want to be.

Another best line in this song - “I’m Player One.” As mentioned a few times in the show before, like in the Broadway upgrade, Jeremy feels lower even in his friendship with Michael - he’s Player 2 as the more experienced Michael is Player 1. As previously established, Jeremy admits that he’s “not the one who the story’s about.” Now he’s ready to finally take control of his life, be the main character and have good things happen to him, and that means cutting out Michael, the old Player 1. The irony here is that Jeremy is less like Player 1 and more like a video game avatar. In reality, the SQUIP is Player 1, making Jeremy do whatever it demands of him.

More best lines! The slew of insults towards the end serves not just as yet more gut punches for the audience but as a major catharsis for Jeremy - It’s telling that the insults get harsher as his rant goes on, from the “weirdo” to the “weakling freak” to the “failure” to the climactic “please don’t speak”. He’s unloading everything that he’s been carrying over the years, ripping out the bullets that have been embedded in his skin and re-opening all the wounds in the process, but he’s done with the pain and he’ll never ever let himself be hurt like that again, if he follows the SQUIP.

I’ve made a whole post about the significance of the best line “Please Don’t Speak” before so I’ll mostly be repeating a lot of what I said there because it’s been a while since that post and because I want to. Who would’ve said that to Jeremy? Probably not Rich or Chloe, it’s not like them. It had to have come from an adult in a position of authority that could’ve commanded Jeremy not to speak like that - one that apparently did so enough times for him to internalise those words like he did the others. (Even worse if it was more than one adult ...). Out of all of the insults, it’s easy to see how that can easily be the most scarring out of all of them - how would an adult let a child know they’re inadequate? By silencing them. Making it clear that their expression of self not only means nothing, but should be forcibly avoided. Put like that, it makes it much easier to see how and why Jeremy fell under the SQUIP’s influence so easily - telling it was hardly different from authority figures he’s experienced before. In even more sad irony, as Jeremy claims that he’s breaking free and letting go of his past as the “please don’t speak”, he’s just walking right into another, similar trap that he can’t easily escape from. The SQUIP literally vocal cord blocks him during The Play - if that doesn’t say “Please don’t speak,” what does?!

The climax is growing! The music shifts into the relative minor as Jeremy fully gives in to the SQUIP’s evil influence. This is the point of no return, the point where he’s literally being surrounded and overtaken - if you’ve seen this on stage or even just a bootleg, you’ll know what I mean, when the lighting shifts and the circuitry start closing in around him, it’s wonderful. The bass ascends, Jeremy declares once and for all that HE IS NOT THE LOSER, THE GEEK, OR WHATEVER, and he never will be again! As some have pointed out, the sequence of notes on the final “again” is the same as at the end of Be More Chill Part 2, except the last note is different. In BMC part 2, it goes further down by a minor third, but in Loser Geek Whatever, it rises up to the same note it started with. This foreshadows Jeremy’s fate - that he will eventually overcome the SQUIP and that he still has it in him to do so. Man, let me just point out how amazing that last belt is - it lasts for a full 15 seconds in a really high range and takes a LOT of control to bring it back up to the high B without breaking. This song really was written for Will Roland - his voice can pull it off seamlessly, but other actors and understudies have had to find workarounds. No disrespect to them, it’s a damn hard song and it kicks ass all the way through. Scott Folan apparently had trouble with it too, but on the day I happened to see him, he pulled it off without breaking, so props to him!

Overall, Loser Geek Whatever is my favourite song in Be More Chill and not just for its sentimental value to myself. It’s a genuinely deep, complex piece that earned every second of its six minutes. Loser Geek Whatever is definitely the missing piece the show needed - not only is it Jeremy’s solo song, it’s also his “I Want” song and, in a way, his 11 o’clock number all in one, as he’s having a major epiphany after going on a journey, albeit only half of one. It’s easy to see why Joe Iconis dubbed this his anti-Defying Gravity, but it’s also easy to draw parallels to No Good Deed - how both Jeremy and Elphaba vow to become something that society is forcing upon them rather than what they are, even if that society’s will is objectively worse for them. Loser Geek Whatever deserves a thousand times the recognition it has and I still wonder to this day what the fandom reaction would’ve been if it had been in the original soundtrack.

So, that was it. I’m not sorry it was this long.

TL;DR: Loser Geek Whatever is wonderful and anyone who doesn’t think so is wrong.

#be more chill #loser geek whatever #joe iconis #will roland #be more chill meta #music theory #broadway be more chill #be more chill 2.0 #be more chill 3.0 #musical theatre theory #tw depression #jeremy heere #michael mell #be more chill analysis #tw emotional abuse #trans jeremy heere

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oh-three · 2 years

Text

Incorrect Guard Quotes (Part 6)

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Linaleh: "Trouble at 2 o'clock!" Brakan: looks down at his watch Brakan: "Now, how do you know that?"

Jurr: “What are you writing?” Rakesh: “The government wants to know what kind of weapons we have in the house. I'm letting them know it's private information.” Linaleh, looking over Rakesh's shoulder: “This just says 'fuck around and find out' in calligraphy.”

Vori: “I'm very scary.” Loktof: “You're about as scary as a wet kitten.” Vori: “Wet kittens are cute, at least I've got that going for me.” Loktof: “And small.” Vori: Vori: “...Yeah, yeah. I guess. “

Brakan: “I don’t mean to be rude—” Tindri: “Yet, sadly, accidental rudeness occurs alarmingly often.”

Vori: “sSSSHIT- I BURNT MY LIP-” Rakesh: “...Why the fuck would you even drink coffee with a METAL STRAW in the FIRST PLACE??” Vori: “BECAUSE WE WERE OUT OF THE PLASTIC ONES!”

Linaleh: “Sleep is the body’s best safety mechanism.” Loktof: “How so?” Linaleh: “It keeps you from screwing up for 8 hours.”

Tindri: “Go big or go home!” Jurr: “Please, for once in your life just go home. I'm begging you. Go. Home.” Tindri: “I'm going big!”

Jurr: “You are, of course, wondering why it is I have brought you here tonight.” Rakesh: “Actually, Jurr, after all these years, I just sort of go with it.”

Tindri: “I desire moisture.” Rakesh: “Please just say 'I want water' like a normal person.”

Brakan: eating a cinnamon roll Loktof: “Cannibalism.” Brakan: confused chewing noises

Vori: “Are you mad?” Loktof: “No.” Vori: “So sharpening your knives at 3 in the morning is just a hobby?”

Rakesh, watching Loktof & Linaleh panic: “What's going on?” Tindri: “Loktof is having a midlife crisis and Linaleh is just having a crisis.”

Vori: “Whether or not I pay income taxes is none of the government's business.” Jurr: “No, well, actually, it is.” Vori: “You don't know my name or what I look like, good luck finding me."

Rakesh: “What has the galaxy ever done for you?! Why would you wanna save it?!” Tindri: “Cause I’m one of the idiots who lives in it!”

Linaleh: “Alright, listen up you little shits.” Linaleh: “Not you, Brakan. You’re an angel and we’re thrilled you’re here.”

Rakesh: “Everything will be ok. You can not stop it.” Rakesh: “Everything will be fine. You have no choice.” Tindri: “What the fuck kind of pep talk is that?” Rakesh: “Ominous positivity.”

Tindri: “So I can either do something dumb that could very well get me injured or I can listen to Jurr and not do the thing.” Tindri: “Well there’s a clear right answer here.” Tindri: proceeds to throw five packs of mentos into a barrel full of diet coke

Linaleh: “I don't follow the rules. I follow dogs on social media.”

Vori: “Why would you think any of this was a good idea?” Rakesh: “Probably because I’m a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence.” Vori: Rakesh: “I don’t know how you keep forgetting this.”

Brakan: “Look, Rakesh, it's the third time this week you had a mental breakdown and its Monday.”

Vori: shoves her hand in the slot of a toaster Brakan: Vori: “…I get confused sometimes.” Brakan: “Me too.”

Linaleh: “I wasn’t that drunk.” Rakesh: “You colored my face with a highlighter because you said I was important.” Linaleh: “BECAUSE YOU ARE!”

Tindri: “We’re playing Scrabble. It’s a nightmare.” Vori: “Scrabble? Scrabble’s great.” Tindri: “Not when you’re playing with Rakesh, it’s not. He puts words like 'ephemeral' and I put 'dog.’”

Linaleh: “Is anyone going to tell me what's going on in here?!” Jurr: “It's kind of complicated, but Rakesh-” Linaleh: “Got it. Forget I asked.”

Vori: “I have a problem.” Rakesh: “Kill it.” Vori: “Can you chill for like, two seconds?”

Brakan: “I'll offer you some friendly advice-” Rakesh: “I don't want your advice.” Brakan: “Well, then consider it unfriendly advice.”

Tindri: “When I get murdered, can you make sure I become an unsolved case?” Linaleh: “wHat?” Tindri: “I want to be on Buzzfeed Unsolved.” Linaleh: “Can we go back to the part when you said 'when I get murdered'?”

Loktof: “I have seen a lot of murders in my time, and all six of them were today.”

Vori: “Go to sleep or you'll hate yourself in the morning!” Rakesh: “I'll hate my self in the morning regardless.”

Tindri, peeling a banana: “May I take your jacket, sir? Hahahaha.” Rakesh: “Do you think other people can’t hear you?”

Brakan & Vori: accidentally set the kitchen on fire Brakan: “We need an adult!” Vori: “Brakan, you are an adult!” Brakan: “We need an adultier adult! Get Linaleh!”

Linaleh: “What is the one thing I told you not to do?” Brakan: “Burn the house down.” Linaleh: “And what did you do?” Brakan: “I made dinner.” Linaleh: Brakan: Linaleh: Brakan: “And burnt the house down.”

Linaleh: “I tried to write ‘I'm a functional adult’ but my phone changed it to ‘fictional adult’ and I feel like that’s more accurate.”

Jurr: “Are you drinking enough water?” Tindri: “Sometimes my tears get in my mouth.”

Loktof: “Rakesh is forbidden from monologuing.”

Linaleh: “What makes you think it's okay to watch Hannibal given its subject matter?” Jurr: “Sometimes, I watch television shows for entertainment purposes.” Tindri: “Because I condone murder and cannibalism.”

Vori: “That sounds super! Doesn’t that sound super, Loktof?” Loktof: “No.” Vori: “I think I speak for Loktof when I say it sounds really super.”

*Tindri drunkenly wanders around the house and Vori is drunkenly giggling* Linaleh, completely sober: sighs “Well, looks like it's just me and you against the world, Rakesh.” Rakesh, going to his room: “Nope, just you.” shuts door

Vori: “I need 28 lightbulbs for 28 ducks.” Linaleh: “Ducks can’t eat lightbulbs?” Tindri: “I think that’s the point.” Vori: “Exactly. I want my ducks to glow so I can find them.”

Rakesh: “I just wanted to say that over the years, I have come to regard you as…people I met.”

Vori: “Say no to drugs.” Tindri: “Say yes to drugs.” Linaleh: “It doesn't matter if you say yes or no to drugs. If you're talking to drugs...then you're on drugs.”

Tindri: “Did you hear that!? Rakesh just threatened to destroy my lego AT-AT!” Loktof: “...You just threatened to kill him in his sleep.”

Linaleh: “If we lose, you’re out of the will.” Rakesh: “I was in the will?”

Linaleh: “I hate to tell you this, but one of you was adopted.” Vori & Rakesh: Rakesh: “Only one...?"

Brakan: “There was a motor close to where I am right now.” Vori: “A motor- a motorcycle?” Brakan: “Oh sorry, a murder.” Linaleh: “That escalated quickly.”

Tindri: "Pick a card, any card." Rakesh: "Fine." Tindri: "Wait, that's my credit card!" Rakesh: "You said any card."

Linaleh: “Loktof... Why did you draw a pentagram on the floor?” Loktof: “Your text told me to satanize the house before you returned.” Linaleh: Linaleh: “I wrote sanitize, Loktof.”

Vori: “As someone who has a long history of not understanding anything, I feel confident in my ability to continue not knowing what is going on.”

Hairdresser: “How would you like your hair cut?” Tindri: “Preferably with scissors, but a sword could be badass."

Vori: “What is your favourite mythical story?” Rakesh: “The Story Of My Will To Live.” Vori: “I don’t think I’ve heard of that one before.”

Linaleh: “I’m not a doctor I’m a medic.” Vori: “What’s the difference then?” Linaleh: “Well doctors actually save lives, medics just make you feel more comfortable as you die.” Brakan: “Note to self: never get shot.”

Rakesh: “We’re going to defeat you with the power of friendship.” Loktof: “We’re not friends.” Rakesh, holding an axe: “We’re going to defeat you with the power of incredible violence.”

Tindri, after having a nosebleed: “Welp. Time to wash the blood off my hands.”

Rakesh, pointing to the wall: “What color is this?” Jurr: “Gray.” Brakan: “Grey.” Rakesh, turning to Vori: “Now tell them what color you think it is.” Vori: “Dark white.”

Linaleh: “You remind me of the ocean.” Rakesh: “Because I'm deep and mysterious?” Linaleh: “No, because you're full of salt and you scare people.”

Tindri: “Can you pass the salt?” Rakesh: “Can you pass away?” Tindri: “Too much salt.“

Vori: “Look, Brakan! It's the good Kush!” Brakan: “It's the dollar store, how good can it be? “

Linaleh: “Why is it that I always lose things as soon as I need them?” Tindri: “Actually, it's not that you lose things when you need them. You lose them a while before. It's just that you LOOK for things when you need them.” Linaleh: “Okay, yeah thanks, Tindri, that's great but WHERE'S THE FUCKING FIRST AID KIT?”

Vori: “That sounds like a terrible plan.” Rakesh: “Oh, we've had worse."

Linaleh, about Loktof: “Rakesh, he’s an asshole! He has purposely stabbed you on more than one occasion!” Rakesh: “Some of those stabbings were accidental!” Linaleh: Loktof: “Okay, well, I know for a fact the third time was accidental.”

Linaleh: “Hey, are you okay?” Tindri: “Yeah.” Linaleh: “You don't look okay...” Tindri: “Then stop looking."

*Linaleh sends more than 5 messages in a row* Rakesh: “I ain’t reading all that.” Rakesh: “I’m happy for you tho.” Rakesh: “Or sorry that happened.”

#no but the monologuing one came out like that first try #I'm dying #star wars also now has lego star wars in it #rip fourth wall #incorrect quotes #jedi temple guard #ocs #grand inquisitor

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matthewbeilschmidts · 3 years

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It’s been a long while since I’ve posted but I’m so glad that I am :’)

This is for Day 1: of @prucanweek - Ordinary

Apologies for spelling errors, it’s a little short but I hope you enjoy 😭💞

Matthew doesn’t mind that he’s living an ordinary life. Really.

He grows up near the coast, two parents, a fraternal twin brother, and their gangly hairless cat, Tony (picked curtesy of Alfred). Their parents take them everywhere they can during their childhood, the beach, museums, sports game. They focus on their interests, figuring out what the two like and dislike, as they encourage them both to be themselves and do what they love no matter what. Alfred debates between whether he likes wrestling or football more, while Matthew settles into hockey. In between family get togethers, community festivals, and endless sports training, they somehow have time for homework. (The two share answers a lot.)

He and Alfred each have their own rooms when they enter their teen years, a space to decorate and fill with their own mementos and awards. The sports continue, but later their parents find themselves a little bit busier than before. They do though, give them as much time as they can during the school year, never wanting them to go without someone by their side.

Matthew fades into the background a little bit as they get older, while Alfred puts himself front and center. Matthew watches once with a hand over his eyes as Alfred auditions for the school musical, and surprisingly he read and sings the lines well. “It’s always the rowdy ones!” their theater teachers says after he’s finished performing, a mix of anticipation from planning on putting Alfred on stage and dread at the thought of having to manage him.

Matthew silently supports him, after all he has his own things to do.

He’s the co-caption of the hockey team, the coach giving him the position to give him a little more of a voice, and his teammates verbally agree, considering on the ice Matthew has a lot more to show than he does in person. He accepts, albeit hesitantly.

By the time graduation comes by, Matthew can barely believe how the time has passed. His team even wins a championship under his watch. Some of his fellow classmates look so ready to go out and experience the world, and it’s scary to him because weren’t they all going at the same pace?

His parents talk him through picking his college of choice, and he decides to go. He needs to do what everyone does and experience the world.

And if he decides he wants to come home, that’s okay because at least he tries.

He’s in his first art class during his third year at university. The time has been going well, he’s got pretty decent grades and has managed to join a few clubs. But he’s not done yet. Extra curriculars, can’t finish without them. He prioritizes his general education first, and even slips himself into a few major classes early on, but humanities is on record now and has to be completed no matter what one’s studying.

He can get through one semester, he hopes.

Next to him, a student is snickering and the professor doesn’t look amused.

“Gilbert.”

“Yes ma’am.”

“If you’re done, I can introduce myself now.”

The professor goes in with complete, in-depth introductory slides with her name and credentials, and a briefing of all they will overcome this semester.

He’s never been an artist, at least not one that picks up a pencil and creates a realistic masterpiece with nothing but that and a pad of paper. Maybe some poetry contests in high school, if that counts. The written word has its own impact, its own set of colors to breathe out for the world to see.

There’s another snicker, interrupting his internal monologue.

He doesn’t say anything, because he doesn’t know the student, and it’s not his place to control others. But, if it starts to hinder the class, maybe he’ll tell him something. He’s paying to be there, too.

The man catches him staring.

“Yes?” he asks Matthew without being spoken to in the first place.

“Oh,” Matthew flushes at being caught, not that he was trying to hide it anyway. “Well, she didn’t say anything funny?”

The guys waves a hand, making a “psssh” noise as he does.

“I’m just laughing because of how formal this all is. She won’t be this dignified later in the semester that’s for sure. She’ll be ripping her hair out.”

Matthew glances back, he doesn’t want to say anyone looks mean but, he would believe it if she was.

“You look scared,” the guy laughs, which is rude because isn’t he the one that just put the thought in Matthew’s mind? “She’s not too mean just a sticker to the rules. Will get real pissy if something doesn’t go right.”

“And you still set her off knowing that?”

The man laughs again, but this time around he’s actually trying to contain it behind the thin art easel. He’s not very hidden.

“She’s my cousin’s wife.”

Ah, that makes sense then? Messing with family is normal, but also he shouldn’t be bothering her at work.

“It’s no wonder you seemed casual.”

“She taught both of the lower division figure drawing classes, too. This is my third semester in her class. She’s the only one teaching this specific class I didn’t have too much of a choice.”

“Art major?”

“Yep! And you?”

“Psychology major. I have to get in some cultural classes.”

“Ever taken art?”

“Actually no, not even in high school. I got through that stuff by working backstage in the theater department.”

“Well not to worry my friend, because you picked the best one.”

“Is it easy to pass?”

“Nope. Well, maybe if she likes your work,” Matthew deflates at the blunt response, “but don’t worry because I’m here to be your guide.”

Matthew perks up, but it takes him a moment. This guy’s gonna help him?

“Are you any good?”

“Am I good?” He looks perplexed Matthew would even ask. Matthew has to cover his own amusement. “I may not look it but charcoal and I go way back. I’ll show you my work later as proof.”

“Deal.”

“Gilbert, since you’re adamant on talking, you can be the first to introduce yourself.”

Even if his name wasn’t said, Matthew feels just as guilty. Caught, for talking on the first day of all things.

“Gilbert Beilshcmidt. Fourth year. I’m an art major and my favorite breakfast food is pancakes.”

Matthew looks surprised that he was paying attention, even to the last addition of their introduction. Matthew’s not sure he would have known considering he was distracted.

And so their friendship starts.

Gilbert sits next to him again. And again.

Where ever Matthew sits in the art room, Gilbert follows not too long after.

Some days they take the sitting desks, some they stand and lean against the stools.

And despite not even talking much, Gilbert treats him like a friend.

“Do you have any plans this afternoon?”

“Nope, this was my last class.”

“Do you want to get some coffee and work on our sketch books.”

“Yeah, let’s go.”

Matthew finds himself meeting Gilbert in his downtime. Every Thursday after drawing for three hours becomes the day they meet. At first, all they do is draw, little more.

Gilbert is animated in all moments, but he has short spurts where he focuses exceptionally on his work. Matthew is no art critic, but he thinks Gilbert expresses himself quite well on paper. Graphite, charcoal, and pastels, all the utensils glide easily without a single stroke missing its mark.

Watercolor though, could use some work, which actually happens to be Matthew’s favorite. Even if the intention is to guide the colors with a brush, it’s okay for them to take a life of their own spreading across the thick paper.

They share snacks, art supplies, and their time.

Gilbert proves himself very useful as he promised. Matthew though never planning to be the next Van Gogh, has to pass this class. And it would be nice to pass it with flying colors, but some concepts are harder to grasp than others.

It’s obvious to tell he’s a beginner, while Gilbert excels. Matthew finds out he only now needs the intro class since it’s the first semester it became a requirement.

Gilbert helps him find the shapes he’s comfortable with, explains the processing for hatching and how it relates to shading. And while he’s no expert, he sees a subtle improvement over the next few weeks that makes some pride swell within himself.

“Do you want to come with me and my friends to this cool bar for dinner on Friday?” Gilbert asks about a month into the semester.

It’s the first time Gilbert and him will have spent time off campus.

“Yeah, I’d love to.”

Gilbert’s friends are just as animated as he, it’s almost hard to keep up. Overwhelming as they are, they’re extremely welcoming. Matthew eases into the atmosphere, joining in when he can but mostly pleased to be out and doing something different.

He’s made friends during his time, but like him they’re a little more reserved and pick quieter places on the town.

It’s fun. And he wants to go out again.

Matthew invites Gilbert and his friends to watch his next hockey game.

After their shock in finding out he plays such a violent sport, they’re all agreeing and planning to find the best seats in the arena.

“Are you serious. Are you hiding muscles under that red sweater?”

Gilbert pokes at him, it tickles when he gets closer to his biceps, but he knows he’s only teasing.

“You think I’m playing but I’m serious! You should have been there, well you were there. On the stands, I mean. We all screamed after you sent that player flying against the wall.”

Gilbert recreates the motions, but only slams himself into the wall and whines after he bounces back. He then plays it off like it doesn’t hurt. Gilbert’s not a very good actor.

People tell him it’s so much different watching him on the ice, but it’s still him. He’s always wondered how much different, he feels like himself. He just knows he goes into the zone when he’s in his gear. He just wants to win. And he will.

“It’s like night day,” Gilbert continues. “You were ready to kill a man down there.”

“You’re not the first to say that. I guess maybe, I could be a little more out there in real life, huh?”

Gilbert stops walking.

“Nope.”

“Nope?”

“You’re perfectly fine the way you are. I like the way you are, so don’t go change. I don’t want to be at risk of dying during art class.”

And as silly as it sounds, he’s pleased. He likes Gilbert a whole lot, too. Just the way he is.

“Do you want to have dinner with me?” Matthew takes the initiative.

“Dinner?”

“Yeah, just you and me. I want to take you out.”

“Like you did to that guy on the court,” Gilbert laughs nervously.

“On a date. Gilbert, would you like go out with me?”

He says yes.

Later that evening when he’s heading home, Gilbert starts running through the courtyard cheering that “I have a date with the cutest guy I’ve ever met!”

Matthew’s window is open, he’s face is bright red and he slams head first into his pillow. He needs to plan the best first date ever.

Three months into dating, he’s finally heading home again for a school break. He wants to take Gilbert with him, who is waiting for the next major holiday to go back home. But isn’t it too soon? They haven’t been dating that long, after all.

But Gilbert surprises him, and jokingly says he wants to go with him because he’ll miss him too much while he’s gone. And then, Matthew asks if he seriously wants to go.

“I do.”

So they ride the 3 hours train down to Matthew’s childhood home. He’s a little bit nervous, because he’s had dates to school dances, and brought friends over, but this is entirely different. This is someone he wants to take a serious step with, even if the time hasn’t been that long. They’ll never get anywhere if they don’t, so they’ll both take the leap and pray it works out.

“Mom, dad, Alfred, this is Gilbert.”

It’s the most timid Matthew’s ever seen him.

“Nice to meet ya, I’m Matthew’s boyfriend.”

After he shakes all their hands, he takes his hand back to link pinkies with Matthew.

There’s not an once of regret in his mind as the long weekend passes.

Gilbert graduates the next year, and the year after it’s his turn. They’re going to move in with each other. Gilbert really has no irresistible urge to go back to his home town, satisfied with just visiting a few times a year. And Matthew thinks he would like to go back closer, just to figure out his next move. So, they go together.

It’s only a one bedroom, but is more than enough space for them both. Gilbert finds work as a docent while Matthew works for a second degree in education.

He still plays hockey for a local league, Gilbert becoming their number one fan. They find their own rhythm, a pace that works for them both, where they can settle down or speed up when they agree with each other. Dewey mornings, warm summers, chilly evenings they spend them altogether.

They decide move up North closer to Gilbert’s hometown. Matthew’s more nervous meeting his grandparents than he was introducing Gilbert to his own family, but Gilbert assures him again and again they’re just a stuffy old family who actually really care about each other a lot more than they let off.

Gilbert’s grandfather towers over him, despite being a hair above 6 feet. He’s silent, eyes boring into Matthew as he introduces himself. And to end all of Matthew’s worries, the elder man pulls Matthew into a hug and tells him he’s glad him and Gilbert are home. Gilbert, just as perplexed as he, stares, but he melts into a pleased laugh.

Yeah, this is his and Gilbert’s home now.

They stay, for a long while, contemplate moving a few times, but they’re satisfied for now.

Gilbert and him always make time for each other, continue their own respective interests with complete support of the other. They’re never afraid to complain, because they always work through it rather then let it simmer.

Gilbert’s vivacious spirit keep them going, and Matthew’s heart keeps them grounded.

His life at first seem a little bit ordinary, but how can he complain when the pieces of the puzzle fit themselves in and stayed locked in tight.

#hetalia #prucan #prucanweek #APH Prussia #APH Canada #.txt post #I forgot all my writing tags #will fix later HAHA

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