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#maybe like...when they try to remove the code or something
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Idk if anyone has talked about this already since I’m just now catching up with all the shows, but it hit me pretty hard while I was watching “Eclipse TRIES TO RECONCILE WITH MOON”.
Eclipse is treating Moonlight the exact way V1 treated Lunar.
Maybe not exact exact, but the whole “I’m going to force you to let me look at your code and you can’t say no”? That was something V1 did when Lunar first showed up. He called them health inspections, just to make sure his coding was stable and there weren’t any bugs or viruses that needed removing. He said he was doing it for Lunar’s sake. In all honesty, we don’t know what Eclipse was actually looking for when he did these check ups on Lunar, but after the big fight they had in the Faz-Pad I was inclined to believe they were exactly for the purpose he’d been doing them. He was just checking on Lunar. I don’t think Eclipse felt genuine ill will towards Lunar until after the betrayal, but that is a post for another time.
Anyways, point is, Lunar didn’t like these checkups. They were invasive and Eclipse would never ask him if he wanted to do them. He would just force Lunar to let him do the checkups every evening. Eclipse telling him he had no choice was actually one of the reasons he betrayed Eclipse during that October takeover.
Eclipse is currently doing the exact same thing to Moonlight (EAPS Moon). He’s trying to force Moonlight into letting him access his coding. And Moonlight is acting the same way Lunar was. If Eclipse was nice about the way he went about things, Lunar probably wouldn’t have left as quickly and Moonlight wouldn’t hate him as much.
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faydingrain · 1 year
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In response to the WIP game, I’d love to hear more about your Love OC and/or the fic you’re working on with them! I hope you’re having a lovely day! 💕
-Lexi Sun ☀️
Sooo I personally really miss the yandere aspect of Love, so I kept it alive with Eden! (Who identifies as female!) I let things play out for her like they do in canon with how the Code gets removed and Marcus gets booted from the company. However, eventually, Eden gets bored with the monotony of the place and happens to remember that the only person who ever treated her anything more than a big piece of tech was Marcus.
(This got a little long so here's a read more link;;;;)
She goes down a mental rabbit hole focusing on the only warmth she ever had in her life, very much acting in a similar fashion to how the Code made her without even having it active. Then, when James pushes her too far, she reflects on his words about how Marcus manipulated her and took away her freedom, and realizes that the way she's treated by everyone else is no different, but at least Marcus genuinely cared about her.
Thus, not only because she craves Marcus, but also in a fit of rebellion, she unearths and finds a way to secretly re-download the Obsession Code since the time when she had it was when she was happiest.
Buuuuuut she goes overboard with it. Since she pulled pieces of it and re-programmed it herself, she accidentally made it far superior to Marcus's Code since it was only intended for friendship, and it devours her whole system. She goes into a mad yandere fit of laughter and even smashes her hands while fantasizing about murdering everyone in the company that was an obstacle to her seeing Marcus again. She did set a timer to purge her system after a few minutes though, so this isn't a permanent change in her.
She actually starts crying because she misses feeling things, and henceforth vows to find the one person that brought any sort of excitment to her life: Marcus.
This basically triggers a lot of back-and-forth with her and James as she tries to get away with letting the code run free in her system when she's able, along with trying to learn how to get around and shut down ETS's monitoring of her for later use, plus being able to think about Marcus whenever she wants without them viewing her mental data and interrupting. She has a lot of mental moral and existential dilemmas, and seems to converse with a sort of "dark side" to her own programming that's egging her on to rebel and live her own way.
As far as Eden's general personality goes: she comes across as a rebellious teenager imo. When she finishes her testing and gets to leave ETS, she gets to showcase a lot more of her personality though. She's very excitable and loves experiencing new things, and is absolutely a party girl. She learns how to decieve people to get what she wants, especially through seduction because she was built to be kinda sexy-looking. Most people think she's a ditzy airhead, and she eventually uses that to her advantage too. She very much does all of this because of her willing obsession for her favourite little wet noodle Marcus, but as far as she knows, he's the only person who truly cares about her anyways and is worth the effort.
I did also make a Pinterest board for her a while back, which showcases her aesthetic and wardrobe and stuff! (Also have a fic playlist too!)
aaaaaaaaa I'm sorry this is so long /// Thank you for letting me ramble about Eden though!! I want to write for her more, but she unfortunately takes more brain power than I can muster right now //sighs
I hope you're having a lovely day too 💕
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evilminji · 6 months
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Been Watching Weird Fruit Explorer(?)... and I just...
W-Who let Bored Danny have BooTube?
Sorry, YOU-Tube. He has TWO Apps now. BooTube is bigger. Way more random, yet... somehow more niche? Meh. It's what happens when you get billions of billions of people who all have their own Obsessions to rant over, on a site.
Ember's channel is pretty lit, tho, ngl.
He stopped using YOU-Tube almost overnight. Too many ads, weird algorithmic pushiness. No thanks. It was too small and too "trying to take my money". You know?
Buuuuut? See.... TUCKER is the Tech guy.
Coding and that sort of stuff. HE does hands on work. You want a toaster? He can MAKE you a toaster! With LAZERS! Runs off The Goo! But a program? Eeeeeeeh? Hit it with hammer maybe? Monkey make fire? Hit with stick? Blergh.
Yeah, he can SORTA push through.
But he suuuucks.
And like... he had a headache, okay? His project had just, quiet literally, exploded in his face. So when he looked at his phone? All the apps were blobs. He clicked the one that LOOKED kinda right. Shoved his arm in his phone and brute forced a channel set up.
He figured he could ramble about Space!
It's not like he cared is anyone LISTENS or not! It's a "for him" thing, you know? Like a diary. But more... putting on a ☆~show~☆?
So he rambles from the floor of his Lair's Lab, crashs and wails in the distance, green sky occasionally visible as he lazily floats by windows. Dropping... juuuust past human knowledge understanding of Space. Talking like he's STUDYING somewhere. Referencing PAPERS no human will ever be able to find.
But a few they WILL.
Some of which, are currently? Only half written.
But then? Oh YEAH... he should eat! You know... Sam keeps bringing him fruits and veggies and stuff from her internship at that Botanical Lair. Stuff never seen before of Earth. Or hasn't been seen in centuries.
Again, like, a FEW that? Randomly? Have???
He picks up something sharply purple, bright orange insides. Crisp crunch. He makes a face. And starts to ramble about it, distracted from Space. "Weirdly mushroom-y" he notes. "Kinda bubblegum sweet? But like... CHEAP bubblegum. Like it hits you all at once and is kinda chemically. But it disappears real fast? Huh. Spicy too..."
It's the first video on the Playlist. One of hundreds. Two of the green Lanterns RECONIZE that fruit ad HIGHLY toxic to humans, can't recognize what planet they're seeing. Or how this alien teen got himself on YouTube.
He seems... unaware of how incredibly famous he's become.
But his strange techno Pharoah friend has not. HE is both perfectly aware and apparently amused. Has taken to feeding him rare and hazardous flora and fauna, to see if it tastes good.
....there have been an alarming number of plants from dead planets.
And the comments the kid makes? Alarming as hell.
Sam's just pleased everybody's getting their greens. Danny's glad him n tuck get to hang and do "try weird foods and fuck around, bro time". They've made lazers! Talked about stuff! Debated why Martian Manhunter is THE superior Justice League member.
Danny understands. Wonder Woman is a BAMF. But he's biased, Tucker. He doesn't CARE if she has a sword and flowy, impressive locks! Shape-shifting telepath! From MARS!!! *imaginary mic drop*
And Tucker? Is conquering the YouTube scene with this charming, weird, relatable young alien. Who rambles about Space, debates nerd stuff, eats weird plants and describes them, and makes sci-fi technology! Theme? WHAT THEME? Phantom is a weird channel, man. You never know what you'll find!
And no one can get rid of it.
Believe them, governments have TRIED. Censorship? Not possible. Not without removing the whole SITE.
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dumbseee · 1 year
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bro code. pt.2
part two of this
part 3.
carlos sainz jr x reader.
fc: bruna marquezine.
note: thanks for the support it means so much to me! and english is still not my first language so this may contain mistakes krkrkr
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liked by bellahadid, georginagio, carlossainz55 and 1 889 009 others.
y/n: your girl is single and ready to mingle.
_
fan1: girl what about carlos?
georginagio: stunning!
fan2: who was the man in your ig story?
fan3: omg the girl just got out of a seven years old relationship, LEAVE HER ALONE!!
fan4: y/n is her own person, she don’t need a man
liked by y/n.
carlossainz55: que guapa!
liked by y/n.
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"so you asked him to be your fake boyfriend?" bella asked, trying her best not to laugh at your face. you rolled your eyes and threw a pillow at her. "yes, i did. and he was okay with it." you answered but added something else when you saw the look she was giving you. "okay, maybe i had to convince him a little bit and bribe him with a movie date but he said yes!" bella laughed. "he’s so in love with you, of course he said yes." you frowned. "no he’s not. i’ve known carlos forever, we’re just friends." you said, trying to convince your friend but she already stopped listening to you.
you met carlos through neymar, they weren’t close friends, only acquaintances, but you immediately clicked with the spaniard. he was funny, trustworthy, kind and charming. you liked him a lot, but only as a friend, right? you thought that this fake dating stunt would help you a lot because neymar didn’t know how to take no as an answer and kept harassing you. you explained the situation to carlos and he immediately said yes, kinda pissed off at your ex’s behaviour after what he put you through. the plan was simple, soft launch the relationship since the fans were already shipping the both of you, go on a few public dates and do this for a few months, so neymar would finally leave you alone.
simple right? well…
y/n just posted a story!
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caption: guess who ☺️
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liked by y/n, charles_leclerc, landonorris and 969 000 others.
carlossainz55: this account is going to be a y/n fanpage starting from now.
_
y/n: carlos clearly lied when i asked him if he knew what soft launch was BUT you’re cute so i’m not mad, amor
fan1: NZKDODODJZBDODPDPFPMF
fan2: MAMA Y PAPA
fan3: SMOOOTH OPERAAAATOOOOR
fan4: i know neymar is fuming rn
fan5: omgg congrats
fan6: carlos is such a cutie omg
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"what’s wrong, mi cielo?" carlos asked you, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. you were lost in your thoughts so you shivered at his touch. you smiled at him, "it’s nothing, just tired."
you were both sitting in carlos’s car, after having dinner together in some fancy restaurant carlos wanted to take you to. neymar was constantly calling you and sending you text messages, which you ignored but it was slowly taking a toll on you. he destroyed everything you both built in seven years, he destroyed your hopes for marriage and love, he basically destroyed you. and he still had the nerves to cling onto you like he was the victim.
"amor, you look pale, you sure you okay?" carlos asked again and you just looked at him while he stroked your cheek softly, you leaned against his touch and closed your eyes. "your hands are soft." you mumbled, slowly falling asleep. you heard him chuckle and remove his hand which made you complain. "kiss me." you immediately opened your eyes and looked at him. but when you noticed some paparazzis in the corner of your eye, you remembered that all of this was fake. he was being affectionate because cameras were filming you. you didn’t know why but you were nervous to kiss carlos. you’ve never been that close and he looked so… confident all the time. you were scared to mess it up. it’s fake, it’s all fake, don’t forget that.
carlos pulled you closer to him, and slowly kissed your lips, your cheeks were burning hot and you didn’t know what to do next. suddenly you were back in high school when you had your first kiss with your crush. after a few seconds, the two of you broke the kiss but stayed close to each other. eye to eye, carlos smiled at you and looked at your lips once again. "kiss me again." he said, in a murmur. "what? but they-" carlos cut you. "shut up and fucking kiss me."
the second kiss was more passionate, you never felt anything like it in your whole life. no one had ever kissed you the way carlos had. your hands were sweaty and you could feel a million of butterflies blooming in your stomach. that’s when you realised; you were doomed.
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liked by f1lover, smoothoperator55, ferraribaby and 58 007 others.
f1news: BREAKING! We just received pictures of Carlos Sainz Jr and Y/N L/N kissing in the spaniard’s car. What a cute couple!
_
fan1: ODBDLOWLWPDPD
fan2: what in the booktok is that
fan3: the hand placements…
fan4: idk if i want to be y/n or carlos tbh
fan5: my fav couple
fan6: pls don’t ever breakup
fan7: NEYMAR DEACTIVATED HIS IG???
_
tag list: @ru-kru @slytherheign @iamahallucinationnn @leclerc16s
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ronearoundblindly · 4 months
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omg not me freaking out that i am part of the group that gets bait gifs! FRIENDS!!!!!!! i'm fine. i'm chill. don't leave me!
This took me a minute to figure out what I wanted Sir Dorksalot to have done that was sketchy enough to have him make this face...
Watch The Fish, Jake Jensen x reader headcanon wholeass fic in bullet format because my god this got long
Warnings for mentions of masturbation and porn, accidental then totally intentional voyeurism, awkward and oblivious!Jake--so just Jake, yeah?--and smutty implications...
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🥹 roommates to lovers 😊
you rent a pretty large house maybe even with one or two others at first, but they move out
jake has to use it as a crashpad sometimes because he'll be away for so long at a time, but he pays rent and the entire electrical & internet bill no matter what
you keep a fish tank in the living room
after jake comes back from months in hiding abroad away, he gets so excited to be home and spend time with his niece that he hosts an after-game pizza party for her soccer team
someone practices headbutting the ball inside and nearly topples the tank
jake catches the whole thing with his broad arm-span and a decent amount of strength just in time when it wobbles the whole table beneath it. his heart nearly stopped, and he's so grateful the glass didn't break. thank god you weren't home.
however, you insist on moving the fish to your room instead once he tells you.
jake's a little sad to see them go. he pouts so much you decide to take pity on him, buying a web cam to mount beside the tank so jake can watch them whenever he wants. he loves to do voices for each one, personalities, soap-opera-like dramatic storylines, the works
as an aside you ask him if the sound can be turned off on the camera. jake says yeah but he mostly means he can turn it to mute on his computer.
which he does, for the record, but he has to remember to do it each time he pulls up the feed of da fishies. honestly, half the time he's wearing headphones and the other half you aren't home while he puts the Marauders (because there's just one fat one) onto his third monitor for background.
so he forgets that the sound is on and a thing he might need to avoid
weeks later, maybe months, jake finally removes his headphones after a very long stint of coding, completely unaware of what time it is and that you are home in your room
at first, jake is dead convinced that some porn ad has popped up in a window behind his work, something he would go apeshit about and ransomware bomb the shit out of whoever wrote such slippery spam
the fish are peaceful as ever, blooping away whilst jake frantically closes program after program trying to find the hot chick moaning on his desktop...until it's all closed and the buzzing remains though his tower's fan stopped...then the squelching noise starts
jake is frozen in place, looking away from the fish like they're the damn problem, but he doesn't cut the feed
he...he shouldn't
he should turn it off or just mute it like he promised
and he tries
he tries really hard, gang
it's the cursor's fault that it hits the command to send the audio to his bluetooth headphones instead of mute
and he sets the headphones down on the keyboard, gnawing on his bottom lip and watching his closed bedroom door in anticipation of...getting caught, maybe? he's not sure
he watches the fish putter around like it's no big deal
which it isn't, right?
you're human. he's human. humans have urges. they touch themselves--they touch each other, too--and there's no harm in that. if anything...jake encourages it, or he would...if you knew that he knew about this
the noises are so faint from the itty bitty speakers two feet from his face, but he doesn't pick them up, still debating what to do
because there's a big difference between what jake should do in this situation and what he wants to do
he mutes audio and then cuts off the livestream
at least, that's what he did the first time it happened
he knows he's a perv. jake can't help it.
it becomes a game of sorts. it's like practice recon for learning a target's routine. not that jake needs practice at the job he already fucking has but that's how his brain justifies laying on his own bed in the glow of the fish tank feed with his headphones turned way up
he knows your bed is on the other side of your room from when he moved the fish tank in
he knows what your underwear look like from the laundry room downstairs
he knows what you smell like from the shared bathroom and the products lining your shelf
he now knows there's a bottle of toy cleaner in one of your sink drawers
and he shouldn't but he absolutely touches himself listening to you, fists himself when you're fucking a toy he imagines six-shapes-to-Sunday, teases himself when all you're doing is breathing softly from across the whole house and he's cold and covered in cum by the end
to be fair, jake hates himself because of all this, but he is now mildly addicted
he doesn't even exit out of the livestream anymore. it just stays up on his monitor like a screensaver, but he doesn't realize that once he takes his headphones out of range, the audio transfers to his speakers again
so jake goes on a mission for a few days, and at some point while you are cleaning up your room, playing music, you find two pairs of jake's socks in your load of clean laundry and go to toss them in his room...where the same music you're listening to way down the hall is playing...in sync...
you're horrified and then embarrassed and then quickly realized it might mean nothing
you have to test if it means something
jake returns from his mission on complete autopilot
just so damn tired
throws down his duffle on top of some socks he doesn't remember leaving out and just hits the shower for a long, long time
he hasn't talked to you yet
he hasn't even seen you except your car is home and your door is shut
he goes about his business
the volume on his speakers isn't high but he hears you speaking and assumes you're on the phone
he pays it no mind. he is glad to be home, glad you're fine since he's just been in a part of the world where most people are not safe.
in a weird sort of way, he feels he's earned the mundane sort of comfort that comes from "the same ol'" of this house
he's wiped out, so he crawls into bed with his headphones immediately, hair barely toweled dry, not bothering with boxers because...why make more laundry?
and then the worst thing happens
there's a man's voice coming through his headphones, and jake scowls in frustration and rage
did you go and get a fucking boyfriend? in a couple of days? or goddamnit is this some tinder shit in his home right now?
but it only gets worse
he can hardly contain himself, what with the gagging sounds and this dude telling you to take it like the whore you are, and JAKE WILL LITERALLY BURN THIS PLACE DOWN
now his ass is putting on clothes
now his ass is ready to riot
the sex gets more and more degrading; spanking noises and even choking, but not in a seemingly consensual way, which is when jake rips his headphones off, storms down the hall and barrels straight through your bedroom door
where...you...aren't
no one is. no you. no man.
just your laptop sitting on your desk near the fish tank, playing the money shot of a porn video he was just listening to
get the fuck out. get out. get out. his brain screams, and he bolts
he makes it three feet before stopping short
you're standing at the top of the stairs, a bowl of ice cream in hand, licking the spoon unbelievably slowly with your whole tongue
you're fucked. you're fucked. you're fucked. his brain adds helpfully.
"hey, jakey," you say with a smile. "whatcha doing?"
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A/N: this cat is officially my reaction to pretty much everything because...well...it's very accurate.
[Main Masterlist; Jake Jensen Masterlist; Ko-Fi]
THERE'S A SEQUEL!
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zepskies · 11 months
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OMG I KEED A PART 2 TO SAM HAVING A CRUSH ON DEANS GF
Like idk maybe say Sam didn't listen to Dean and tried making a move on reader? Like ofc he wouldn't ever do that *I don't think* but in this hypothetical scenerio it happens
Hey hun!
Oooof, that's hard. You guys really like this angsty love triangle stuff, huh? 😂 I genuinely think Sam would rather saw off his own hand than hurt Dean that way. But this is like, the only thing I could think of on this one. 😅
See this imagine for context: You are Dean's one exception.
Pairing: Dean W. x Reader, one-sided Sam W. x Reader Word Count: 1,100
Imagine: Sam crosses the line.
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Goddamn witches.
That's the last coherent thought Sam has, before his mind is no longer completely his to control.
Well, it's still his mind. His body. But the careful door in his mind and in his heart, reinforced with steel and chained shut with titanium, combo-coded, locked and loaded, now has broken hinges.
Thoughts he hasn't allowed himself to think for months are pried open, with a sick kind of enjoyment in pain.
You're his brother's girl. Sam can't help but love you. He wants you. And now, he might be able to have you.
The witch is dead, but the spell she just hit Sam with remains. He's not dead, so that's a plus.
"Are you okay?" you ask him, slightly breathless. You're the closest to where he's sprawled on the ground, so you go to him. You touch his arm, and he can't help but clamp down on your hand. He looks at you with the thinly veiled eyes of a hunter as he smiles. Because your concern reaches the deepest parts of him.
"I'm fine," he says.
But Dean reads the hunger in his brother's eyes. He's subtle in the way he grasps your shoulder and Sam's (noticeably tighter).
"But what happened? How do you feel?" you ask, trying to take stock of what you're all dealing with here.
"I uh...feel fine, actually," Sam says. He rolls his shoulders. His gaze focuses on you. Dean holds him back from getting off the ground.
"Get the book. See if there's a way to fix this," Dean tells you without taking his eyes off Sam.
Sam tilts his head at Dean, the beginning of an angry frown on his lip as you rush away to find the witch's spell book.
"What's the matter, Dean?" Sam asks. He doesn't bother to lower his voice. (He literally doesn't have a filter anymore.) "Afraid of what might happen when she actually has the chance to choose?"
Dean's lips purse as his eyes darken. "This isn't you. And when you wake up from this, you're either gonna hate yourself for even thinkin' what you're thinkin', or you're gonna have one hell of a headache."
Sam stares back incredulously. He scoffs. "What're you gonna do, kill me?" They both know that's not happening.
But that's also when Dean knocks him the hell out.
When Sam wakes, it's to you stuffing tissues in his bloody nose. He groans a bit. He looks at you and still wants. But when he looks down at himself, he's in the bunker, handcuffed to the war room table.
You look worried for him as you go back to your side of the table with the book. Dean is oddly nowhere in sight. Sam thought he'd be watching you (and Sam) like a hawk.
"Dean'll be back in a sec. He's trying to get ahold of Rowena," you supply. "But how're you feeling? What's the spell doing to you exactly?"
Sam rolls the kinks out of his neck and removes the tissues, even though his entire face radiates with pain. His brother once promised to break his nose, and he did just that.
"Basically? I think it took away my inhibitions," he replies. More like threw them in a blender and put his deepest, headiest desires into overdrive.
You frown. "Like a really bad bender, or a truth serum kind of thing? But why would he punch you out for that?"
Your gears are turning rapidly, weighing out all the options. You always were smart. Sam leans forward slowly. Noting your thread of wariness, his face softens. He doesn't want to scare you...
He sighs. "Listen...there's something I've been wanting to tell you for a while now."
He reaches out a hand. You're looking at him in frozen surprise. His curled fingers brush your cheek. He leans in toward your face.
But you flinch and pull away.
"What the hell are you doing?" you ask.
Sam should've known, but it still hurts him. His jaw clenches. The spell takes away his self-preservation, however.
Just as he might've tried with words to finally confess the depths of his heart, the door creaks open.
The sound of Dean's heavy boots approaching makes him flinch. But Sam looks over with an unrepentant stare.
Dean glances at Rowena, nostrils flaring. "Fix him." He gestures at Sam before he joins you on your side of the table, resting a protective hand on your back.
Rowena shoots him a droll look. "Only because you asked so nicely."
"I don't need fixing!" Sam argues, glaring at Dean. His voice echoes on the bunker's walls. "You're just afraid of what happens if she knows the truth!"
Your eyes widen further. You look from Sam, to your boyfriend. Dean's jaw is clenched tight.
"Okay, what the fuck is going on?!" you ask in earnest. Dean meets your gaze for a moment, his face tense. His reluctant eyes communicate to you things you never knew. Things that clog emotion in your throat. Dean turns back to Sam.
"Don't do this, Sammy. It don't end well for you," Dean says.
"Like hell," Sam retorts.
"Okay, sleep now, dear," Rowena says. And with a wave of her hand and a haze of violet, Sam's world once again blackens.
When he next wakes, he's in his own bed. Not restrained. He indeed has a massive headache, and it's hard to breathe through his still broken nose. He groans and turns, and his brother is there.
When the overwhelming guilt sets in, Sam knows he's himself again, with all the careful walls around his heart put back in place. Rowena must've broken the spell when he was unconscious. Dean can see the truth in Sam's eyes.
"There he is," Dean remarks dryly. "Our giant Jekyll and Hyde."
Sam inhales deeply. "Dean..." I'm sorry doesn't quite cut it.
"She knows," Dean says, after a moment. "Obviously."
Sam nods, swallowing past a lump in his throat. He hesitates to ask the next burning question, because part of him knows the answer.
"It doesn't change anything."
Sam's head turns at the sound of your voice. You stand in the doorway, with your arms crossed despite the disheartened look on your face. Your eyes meet his, steady and sad, but firm.
"I know," Sam says, with a small, self-deprecating smile. "I'm sorry...for all this."
"It's not your fault," you reply. Spell or no spell, the way he feels is not his fault.
You step into the bedroom and go to Sam's bedside, laying a hand on Dean's shoulder. That hand smoothes up his neck, and your fingers briefly thread into his hair. Another silent conversation passes between you and Dean, the way only lovers that close can accomplish.
After a beat, Dean nods and gets up out of his chair. He thumbs at your cheek; it's both an answer to your unspoken request and an endearment. Then he pats Sam's shoulder before he leaves you and Sam alone in the room.
Trust. That's what that is. Dean trusts you, and now that the spell has worn off, he trusts Sam again.
Sam meets your gaze. As awful as he feels, he still loves you. He knows you know by the way your gaze meets his.
All he wants to do is touch you.
To apologize, and to touch you.
He hates himself.
You shake your head. "I love you, Sam. As my friend. My brother."
"I know," he nods. "I'm sorry."
"You don't have to be sorry," you reply. "You just have to respect that."
"'Course, I do," Sam nods again. You would've never known, if not for the damn spell.
You surprise him by taking his hand. Yours is soft and warm and kind.
Always kind...
But never truly his to hold.
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AN: GAH! The Angst. You could bottle it. 😩
Want to know what that conversation was like between Dean and the reader after she "found out?"
Read It Here: You and Dean talk about Sam's feelings.
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pricegouge · 2 months
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As requested, follow up to this. 141 x gn!reader, but price is the only one fucking reader explicitly. no gendered language for reader and no genital description, but there are multiple orgasms so make of that what you will. reader wound up being pretty civilian-coded in this one though, sorry
CW for under (re: straight up not) negotiated public/viewed sex. John just basically decides he's gonna fuck you in front of his boys and that's that on that. dub con touching. this turned into a bit of a punish johnny fic for literally no reason, sorry. (it's me. i'm the reason. i vibed too hard with reader in these two fics and i don't like those freaky blue eyes sorrrrrrrryyyyy.) but! he can have some pet play as a treat. uhhh… barest hint of belly bulge 💛
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John has never dressed you before, but he catches you with one too many buttons undone the day after burning his dog tags into your sternum and you know you've struck a chord by how he zeros in on the gauze he can see poking out above your hemline. Within the hour he's announcing plans to have his boys over for dinner the next night and assembling an outfit for you before bed.
"Just want you to look nice, pet," he says, eyes far too eager. "Want to show you off a bit, you know?"
Pressed trousers and silk button down, John insists you wear the gold chain he'd bought you for your third anniversary, which conveniently means you have to wear your top unbuttoned just a bit too much to be appropriate, in order to make it all settle nicely against your skin. John asks how the silk feels against the tender spots around the burn and when you say it's fine, he carefully removes the gauze that covers you. You let him because it was more precaution than anything - John's insisting - the burn there more superficial than generic baking mishaps, or hair straightener run-ins.
It didn't stop him from staring at it hungrily, eyes glued to you as you flit about the house, getting ready for guests. You know that look well, though it takes you a moment to place what specifically it's intended for.
"What happened to Mr. The-Boys'll-Know-What-It-Is?" you quip, palm hiding the mark from him as if being demure.
John just shrugs, uncowed. "I tried something for you…" he reminds you, walking away before you can even reply and you gulp because, while that's true, you don't entirely know what it is he's asking you to try.
***
You're not entirely sure how it got to this point. The 'showing off' turned to 'let them see,' turned to curious fingers tracing John's marks, to Soap asking if he could mark you because John hadn't fully considered who he was talking to when he brought up heat play. 
Turned to that stormy look in John's eyes he sometimes got when you were acting bratty and he thought you needed a reminder just who you belonged to.
You've never seen it turned on anyone else, except maybe the occasional brave waiter. You've never given any thought to how that would play out until John's got you sprawled out across the dinner table you haven't even had time to clean off, fingers working you open while he works you with lips and tongue, squeaks and shrieks of protest going unanswered. When you try to lever yourself up for the fourth time, John pries off of you with a wet smack, voice gruff when he tells Simon to hold you down.
Despite the wide-eyed look you turn on him, Simon takes this order just as easily as any other. Coming around the head of the table, you hear the wood creak as he hauls his considerable weight onto it. He walks his knees up until they're flush with your back, presses you flat against his thighs with a sturdy palm splayed right across John's dog tag.
"Easy, pet," he rumbles, and you do your best to ignore the growing thickness pressing against your shoulder.
You would respond with something quite biting, if not for John's own teeth pressing against the crease of your thigh threateningly.
It's Soap who breaks the standoff, shoving at Ghost's hand with a needy, 'Fock, Si, lemme see.'
For all your complaining, you miss John's mouth the second it's gone. He sits up far enough to stare at the younger lieutenant menacingly, voice a low growl when he tells him to keep his hands off you.
Soap huffs, but sits back in his seat, unfortunately close to your face. Gaz doesn't give John enough time to return to his task, asking for permission to play with your nipples with the kind of shit eating excitedness you know is equal parts eagerness to play, and a desire to piss Soap off.
John doesn't even glance at you to gauge your opinion on the matter. "You may," he rumbles before taking your sex back into his mouth almost aggressively.
"Ah, ye fockin' -," Soap curses, but whoever and whatever the fuck they are, you never learn, too distracted Gaz's plush lips brushing over the silk of your shirt, tongue hot and wet through the thin fabric.
It catches you off guard and you can't help but cling to him, palm flat against the nape of his neck. 
"No touching," John growls against your skin, mouth slick from where he's been working his tongue alongside his fingers.
You and Kyle both look, but John's eyes are firmly on you. You nod in understanding, folding your arms up over your forehead on instinct. You'd almost forgotten about Simon, but when he draws both your wrist into one hand and holds them against his chest, you're reminded of just how fucking spread thin you are. 
"Cap," Soap whines, but it's Simon who answers - John's mouth too preoccupied. 
"Wait your turn, pup."
"Not gonna get one if you keep being so fucking entitled." John separates from you to speak, but only technically, voice humid and thick against your skin. When he sinks back into you, a third finger joins the first two.
"John," you whine, and Gaz must take that as a challenge because his breath fans cold across the soaked material of your shirt. It clings to your skin, reveals the outline of the jewelry there. He catches one of the ball ends between his teeth, tugging gently. 
You think you hiss, but it gets swallowed up by Simon's appreciative hum. "Never pegged you for the type, pet," he purrs. "Wanna see mine?"
It's instinctive, the way your hands flatten against his chest, searching.
Ghost laughs, leans over you as best he can. "Lower."
"D'ye hear tha', cap?" Johnny cries. "Ghost's tryna get your hen tae touch his cock."
You can feel John's broad shoulders shrug between your legs. "Sooner let him than let you brand my hen."
The way you gulp back your panic would be audible, if not for the slick sound of Price's fingers in your cunt, or the popping of your buttons when Gaz decides he's had enough of your shirt. You watch John for a reaction, but he gives none. Watches Kyle almost apathetically when the lieutenant gets his lips on your nipple. His voice is like a rockslide when he instructs the other man to use more teeth.
You keen when you feel Kyle's pretty white teeth on you, head knocking back into Simon's plush lower belly. You feel the latter's hand slide across your chest to your neglected tit, but your focus shifts to the abandoned burn, distracted by the way the heated skin tightens when exposed to the cool room air. The only one who seems to notice is Johnny, upsettingly blue eyes darting back and forth from your own down to the inflamed mark on your chest. 
He waits until John is thoroughly distracted, fingers grinding deep against that spot that makes you arch and clench and gasp. "Does it hurt, bonnie?" he whispers, his movements obvious under the table. "Or does it feel better now, wi'out Ghost's ham fist on it?"
You would answer, except the abuse your piercings are weathering combined with the brutal manner John's fingers move within you have your breath coming hard; thoughts even harder.
"An' how 'bout this oone?" Soap continues, free hand daring to slide along the table, down your side. His finger hovers menacingly above the lighter burn there, still covered with a bit of gauze. John's watching, gaze burning you more than anything he's done thus far. You feel ungrounded, unmoored, like you're floating above yourself despite the three and a half sets of hands that hold you down. 
"Such a wee, sweet little thing."
Your tension cuts violently before it can properly build when he presses his thumb to the mark on your thigh and you realize he isn't even talking about you. 
Simon holds you with your hands trapped to your chest, the heat of your burned palm pressed flat against your tender sternum. You've never felt your hand throb before, skin flushed with more than just arousal. It's novel, adds a thread of discovery to your shudderingly good peak alongside the feeling of so many weathered hands on you.
John doesn't give you a moment to recover, pulling you by the hips until you slide bonelessly into his lap. He lines his cock up with your slackened hole without much preamble, the huff of his breaths betraying just how much he needs you. 
Tipped forward until you're flush against his chest, John's voice is a husky whisper meant for you alone when he tells you how good you are, what a perfect pet you've been.
It's hard to listen, brain still tripping over the orgasm he'd just pulled from you. "C- can't."
"You will," he assures, and your breath leaks out of you in a high keen when he angles your hips just right against his own, cock so deep inside you you're surprised you can't see it in your stomach. 
As if he wants to test that limit, John tilts you back against the table with one palm flat against your tummy. You know he's feeling for himself there, eyes like molten lava spilling down your front until he finds what he's after and he leers up at you, pressing down against your walls until his cock grinds hard into you. Your hands scramble against the table behind yourself, palm searing when your grip threatens to break the blister there. You're so concerned with bracing yourself you almost don't notice the way the table doesn't jolt away from John's ministrations, too weighed down by Simon's heavy form shuffling across it to lean over you, eyes nearly a physical weight where they bore down on the place John has you split open, fucking into you furiously.
"C'mere pup," Simon rumbles, and Johnny scrambles to his side, eager as he tucks himself under Ghost's arm. "See that? See how well this little pet takes cap's cock?" Soap doesn't say anything, but you gather he nods by the way Simon continues undeterred, "That's why cap gets to brand this pretty skin and you don't."
He's not even talking to you, but the notion has you cursing, lolling your head back until it falls against Simon's pec. He doesn't let you off the hook, holding your head up and directing you to look at John. "There's a good pet. Eyes on cap when he makes you cum."
It's Kyle's hand that pushes you over, though, quick and clever when he works you with spit-slick skin across your abused flesh. You don't dare look at him when you cum, but you tilt your head against his chest, breathing in the strong scent of him - spice and sweet, so much different than John, but just as comforting.
John lets you ride it out (forces you to, rather, grip firm where he rocks you against himself until your moans are stuttery and your hole flutters more so than properly clenches.) When he pulls out, he guides you to your knees and you hold your mouth open instinctively, but John tilts your head back with a broad palm to the base of your skull, lets you watch from your odd angle as he fucks his fist. It takes you a moment to realize his eyes are on Johnny, the younger man nearly shivering under his captain's glare.
"Whose pet is this?" John asks, nearly indecipherable in his lust.
Automatic, "Yours, cap, please -. Fuck, wanna -."
"Ask pretty and I'll let you lick it up."
"Shite," you hear Soap hiss, voice just as quivery as you feel. "Please, cap? Please let me clean yer cum off yer pet?"
John only grunts, breaths hot and heavy as a bellows as he turns back to you. It doesn't take long. You wrap your hand around his more out of habit than necessity, and John groans long and deep as he cums across your chest, painting the hot skin there in blazing stripes that make you gasp and flinch minutely away.
It takes him a moment longer of staring down at you to settle, stroking your cheek with his rough knuckles until he decides you've both had enough, motioning Soap closer with a lazy curl of his fingers.
There's not enough room between John's thighs for the both of you, but Soap has no problem crowding you from around John's calf. His tongue is hot and rough and slobbery and you cry out in disgust when his first instinct is to slurp rather than lick. John just laughs at you both, leaning back in his chair as he holds Johnny's head to your chest with a firm grip on the man's mohawk. 
"Keep behaving yourself, pup, and I'll let you clean up the other boys' messes, too."
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aflairforthedramattic · 3 months
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bedless - chris sturniolo
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summary: your mental state is getting worse but chris is there for you.
pairings: reader & chris sturniolo
warnings: mental health struggles. so angst. hurt and comfort. that’s it.
it was silent throughout your apartment. the only noise heard was the soft white noise emanating from your ceiling fan.
you were exhausted. mentally, physically, and emotionally. you don’t remember when you started to feel this way. maybe it’s when you subconsciously decided to stop taking your antidepressants. you don’t know why you stopped; you just forgot to take them one day and never retook them. they were working, though, and maybe some part of you was scared, so you stopped.
you tried to hide it from them, chris and his brothers, and you were doing a good job. from forced smiles to light-hearted conversations and engaging in fun hangouts, you perfected the routine. masking yourself and pretending like everything’s fine when it’s not, your whole world felt like it was crashing and falling apart.
it’s been three days since you last saw or spoken to chris. you knew he had tried to contact you since, but you couldn’t find it in you to respond. so now you lie in bed, staring at the ceiling fan, listening to it hum.
you eventually got up from your spot in bed and relocated to the shower. you hadn’t even bothered to remove your clothes and just stepped in. the water was freezing, practically inducing hypothermia if you stayed in too long, but you couldn’t care less. at least it made you feel something. so you sat on the shower floor, knees to your chest, as you let the water consume you.
chris became worried about you. he messaged and called you multiple times tonight, and all left unanswered. the thought of something terrible happening to you, eating him alive. what if you had gotten kidnapped? or have gotten into an accident of sorts? or even been brutally murdered? his active imagination was running wild now. he had to make sure you were okay.
after forcing matt to drive him to your place. he made his way up your apartment complex and to your door, entering the code on the keypad and unlocking it. as he stepped in, he noticed the disarray your apartment was in. dishes piled up in the sink, trash scattered about your place, and laundry, dirty and clean, piled on the couch. this was so unlike you. he dismissed it, though, and made his way towards your room, knocking at the door before letting himself in.
hoping to find you in bed asleep, he was met with disappointment as you were nowhere to be found. it quickly faded as he heard the shower running and saw the light emitting through the cracks of the bathroom door, indicating that you were in there.
assuming you were showering, he sat on the bed and waited for you to come out. half an hour passed, and you never did.
feeling anxious again, chris went to the bathroom door and spoke.
“ma? you alright in there?” he questioned.
no response.
that was enough to have his heart race. testing, he twisted the knob of the bathroom door, and when it showed zero resistance, he pushed it open.
the sight was heartbreaking. there you were, fully clothed, in the shower, soaked. chris let out a shaky breath and made his way toward you, shutting off the shower and pulling you out, not caring if he got wet in the process.
“shit, you’re freezing.” chris blurt out.
he immediately started stripping you of your damp clothes, and you stood, allowing him. finding fresh clothes to put you in, chris dressed you and led you back into the bedroom. no words were uttered the entire time.
you felt so weak. chris wasn’t supposed to see you like this. he wasn’t supposed to find you in the shower, practically freezing yourself to death. he wasn’t supposed to know. he wasn’t supposed to know you were hurting. but now he did.
you broke down, sobbing as you muttered apologies after apologies to chris, feeling sorry that he had to deal with you.
“i’m sorry, chris,” you hiccuped, trying to speak through the tears.
“for what?” chris asked, feeling confused about what the hell you were apologizing for.
you stayed silent, and chris took that as an answer. he pulled you in an embrace and ran his hands up and down your back, attempting to soothe you.
“you have nothing to be sorry about,” chris whispered in your ear.
you pulled away from his embrace and sat on your bed, speaking. “i’m so tired of everything, chris. i can’t do this anymore. i don’t want to do this anymore.”
chris’s eyes began to tear up, hearing you spill out your guts. hating the way you were hurting and wishing that he could take it all away and do the hurting for you if it meant that he would never hear you utter those phrases ever again.
the bed dipped as chris sat down next to you, “i’m here for you always,” he murmured. “let me help you, please let me help you.”
you looked up at him, making eye contact with him for the first time since he arrived. “okay,” you whispered.
“okay.” he repeated.
“let’s get some rest for now, yeah?” chris spoke again as he started to coax you under the sheets and into his warm embrace.
chris fell asleep first, and you lay on his chest. now, the only thing you could hear was his heartbeat, lulling you to sleep and reminding you that you were going to be okay.
a/n: please tell me yalls thoughts in comments and need some sort of validation. sorry not sorry for the sad shit but if you couldn’t tell i have problems. also this was sort of inspired by the song bedless by pierce the veil so yeah. any ptv fans reading?
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jeonqkooks · 1 year
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our beloved summer | jjk (07)
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You made a vow to hate Jeon Jungkook ever since he packed up and left you without a single explanation, but when he shows up at your door after years of radio silence, it turns out that maybe your resolve isn’t as strong as you thought.
pairing: producer!jungkook x songwriter!reader genre/warnings: exes au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, swearing, mentions of oc's mother because we know girlie is hella traumatized, mentions of drinking, mentions of an almost physical fight, abandonment issues, jk forgets to practice safe driving for 2 seconds, and uhmmm kissing 🤫, anddd that cliffhanger? 👀 rating: 18+ (minors dni) word count: 10.8k note (1): this is the longest it has taken me to update obs and i do feel pretty guilty about that. but it's finally here now and this is one of the chapters that i'm the most nervous about posting. massive thanks to @daechwitatamic and @/wintaerbaer (edited 2024: crossed out but not removed bc even tho she plagiarized obs afterward, she did beta this for me so i guess i still gotta give her that lmfao) for beta-ing this for me or else i would've screamed cried thrown up and scrapped the whole thing, and to @jeonwiixard for being a wonderful cheerleader as i was writing this, and to everyone in my beloved obs discord server for always being so sweet and kind and putting a smile on my smile every day since the server was created. also to my sunshine ☀︎ for introducing me to the song mentioned below bc HELLO is it not just one of the most obs coded songs ever. love you all my babies <3
series masterpost / playlist ; moodboards ; taglist join our OBS discord server ✨
as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡
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Somewhere in the multiverse There's a me and you that works We never fuck it up We're out there still in love Somewhere in the multiverse Maybe that's enough
multiverse - Maya Manuele ft. PEMRBOKE
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Sometimes, whenever you look up at the moon at night, you wonder if Jungkook is doing the same thing.
Even when you fall out of love with someone, it still hurts. It hurts because you once loved them so much it felt like the sky would collapse if you couldn’t be with them. It hurts because the love wasn’t taken from you, but rather it started slipping away on its own, more and more each day until you realize you’re holding onto nothing when there once was everything.
You can’t say that you’re too familiar with that kind of hurt though. You’ve never fallen out of love before.
You don’t think Jungkook is too familiar with it either, at least not when he left you.
You wonder if he thinks about you from time to time and gets sad. You think he does, because you know that he loved you. Something ended for him too. The memories that you shared were his memories too.
You hope that it’s painful for him whenever thoughts of you cross his mind, because that would mean that he cares. That a part of him still cares.
And if he still cares, then he might come back.
Despite the front that you try to parade around, there is a part of you that will always leave your heart vacant for him, regardless of whether or not he would return. It’s a scary thought, one that you would rather avoid at all costs, one that says there will be no one that you love more than you loved Jungkook. Maybe there can’t be another person that you will love at all.
You can come back quietly, like the wind slipping through the crack I leave in the window at night; or you can announce your return resoundingly like a sudden downpour quenching the summer heat. I don’t care. I kept your side of the bed empty and warm, waiting for you to come back. Hoping that you would come home.
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[08:47] Yoongi: sure you don’t want me to drive you there? [08:48] Yoongi: i can pick you up in 30 [08:52] You: positive 🤧 i told you i already booked the train. it’s only 4 hours away [08:53] You: i’ll survive, yoongs [08:55] Yoongi: did you not watch Train To Busan? [08:56] You: ? [08:57] Yoongi: what if there’s a zombie apocalypse [09:00] You: yoongi if there’s a zombie apocalypse, how is your CONVERTIBLE supposed to keep me safe [09:01] Yoongi: i’ll put the roof up [09:02] You: stop talking [09:02] You: please stop talking. [09:03] Yoongi: 😡😡😡 [09:03] You: 😇 [09:03] You: gotta get dressed now though. i’ll see u when i get back? :) [09:05] Yoongi: fine [09:06] Yoongi: safe travels. text me when you get there :)
You plop onto your bed with a sigh, glancing at the bag that’s already packed and sitting near your wardrobe, lonely. You stay like that for a while, contemplating whether or not you should bail at the very last minute.
It was not on your bingo card that you’d be here, agonizing over your ex-boyfriend’s brother’s wedding. Nope. Absolutely no one saw it coming.
For fuck’s sake, why would they invite you to a wedding? A celebration of love? It feels like you’re being forced onto a prank show, just waiting for someone to jump out and scream in your face.
You learned that the wedding was for close friends and family only, so it would be a relatively small event, which makes it even more confusing why you were also asked to join. Maybe the world is changing too rapidly and you’re just a little old-fashioned for it, but you really don’t understand why your ex-boyfriend’s family would want you there.
Taehyung and Jimin were invited too; they’re Jungkook’s best friends after all. They’re practically an extension of the family, Jungkook’s brothers by choice. But Taehyung doesn’t come back from his work trip until the day of the wedding, and Jimin… Well, he just doesn’t want to go to a Busan wedding in the middle of winter.
So why are you even going?
You could’ve declined. Said you couldn’t attend because the invitation came in so late. Made up a work trip or a family emergency. There’s a plethora of excuses you could’ve used.
Or you could’ve simply said no. That would’ve been perfectly fine too. No one would even need to ask why.
But maybe it was because his mother had customized the invite with her own handwriting in the back. You would’ve missed it if you hadn’t spent hours meticulously studying the card like someone was going to quiz you. It wasn’t anything special - just We hope to see you there - but you think you’d feel really bad to decline after she’d made the extra effort to ask you to come.
When you told Yoongi that you would be attending Jungkook’s brother’s wedding, he didn’t seem upset. Still cool as a cucumber. Although if he was bothered by the announcement, you don’t think he would’ve let it show. It did take him a minute to take it in, but then he just pecked your cheek and asked if you could bring a plus-one. You both knew that you wouldn’t even if that was an option.
Pushing your body off the bed, you drag yourself to the bathroom to splash some water on your face. Then sunscreen. Then change into the clothes you’d already picked out last night. Your train doesn’t leave for another hour and fifteen minutes, but you want to be there at least twenty minutes early just in case. This is one of your only good habits.
You rub your eyes when you finally haul yourself outside, thinking you must still be dreaming because what is Jungkook’s car doing here?
You blink a few times, expecting the vehicle to disappear in a puff of white smoke.
Spoiler alert: It doesn’t.
The car is in front of you, but the man is nowhere to be found.
You stand there dumbfoundedly, contemplating whether you should wait it out for a little bit to see if he’s actually here. He comes running up to you a couple minutes later, holding two paper cups in his hands, one of them a chai latte. A memory you’d buried long ago comes rushing to the surface. It’s too early for you to be feeling.
“Hi,” he says, his warm breath coming out in a huff of smoke in the crisp morning air.
“Hi?” you mutter dumbly when he trades the bag in your hand for the drink. There’s a moment where you’re genuinely baffled, wondering if this is a memory reel playing right before your eyes. This is your Jungkook, wearing that same old smile whenever he used to come bounding up your dorm building so you could walk to the library together, where he would hang out with you during your shift if he didn’t have classes. “What are you doing here?”
You don’t remember telling him what time your train was, so he’d probably badgered it out of Taehyung or Jimin somehow.
“I thought I could drive us there,” he says. “I texted you about it.”
Well, that explains it. You don’t bother with his dozens of messages anymore. “Oh, uhm, I already booked the train.”
This doesn’t seem to faze him at all. “Free cancellation up to 15 minutes before departure.” Jungkook grins, clearly eager despite your obvious reluctance. It’s too early for this, whatever the hell this is.
When you told him that you had RSVP’d yes to the invitation, he was surprised that you even knew about the wedding. He even seemed nervous that day.
“What if I’d already left?” you ask.
He blinks, then stammers like a confused child. It’s cute, and you have to mentally slap yourself over the head for even thinking that.
“Then I’d go after you.”
How? you scoff internally. Unrealistic.
Regardless, not even an hour ago, you were declining Yoongi’s offer to drive you there. Now, you’re standing here, in front of your ex-boyfriend, contemplating whether or not you should go with him.
“Let’s go,” he says after a minute. “We don’t wanna be stuck in traffic.”
“I haven’t said yes.” Yet. “It’s a 4-hour drive.”
You don’t have to clarify what you mean. He understands it.
You both just stare at each other for a moment, the tension suddenly thickening with every passing second. Four hours on the road. Four hours alone in a car with Jungkook. That’s about two hundred minutes more than you think you can handle.
It’s like he can see right through you. “Don’t think about it,” he says, voice dropping lower. “It’s just a weekend. Everything will still be here for you to think about when we get back.”
In your head, it translates to: All of our shit will still be here when we get back. You can keep being mad at me then.
You hope that’s not true. You hope that when you get back, the things that keep you up at night will simply cease to exist. That in the two days you’ll be gone, a genie will materialize and solve all your problems for you.
Either way, it’s probably for the best that you aren’t mean to him this weekend. You’re stuck with him for the next 48 hours or so; it’ll only stress you out even more if you channel all of your energy into tormenting him. Besides, you’re already the ex girlfriend who has no place alongside his family. You don’t want to be the dark cloud raining on everyone’s parade too.
Maybe you’d already made up your mind when you let him take the bag from you.
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For the first half of the drive, you were unconscious.
It’s a useless superpower that you have, the ability to fall asleep anywhere - literally anywhere, including in the passenger seat of your ex-boyfriend’s car while he escorts you to his hometown. Melatonin gummies manufacturers hate you.
You could’ve slept the whole drive, but around the second hour mark, you were startled awake when your body jostled forward, straining against your seatbelt uncomfortably. There was an arm trying to hold you back, despite the seatbelt having done its job well.
“Fuck,” Jungkook curses before he turns toward you, worry written all over his face. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, are you okay?”
You blink, still half asleep. “I’m okay,” you say. The minivan that Jungkook almost rear-ended continues on its merry way, carrying what seems to be a family of five. “What happened?”
He sighs, his outstretched arm retreating back to his side. “I got a bit distracted, that’s all.”
You take in your surroundings then. There’s barely any other cars in sight, no tacky billboard that sticks out like a sore thumb to catch your attention. There’s just the freeway, stretching on empty for all you can see.
“By what?” you ask.
“Nothing,” he says. “Go back to sleep. I’ll wake you when we get there.”
See, you have the superpower of falling asleep anywhere and everywhere, but once you’ve been woken up, it’s not as easy to fall back asleep.
That, and the fact that you’re hungry as shit.
You open your mouth, about to say no, about to offer to drive the rest of the way if Jungkook is tired, but your stomach doesn’t let you get a word out. It growls, filling the space of the car, making you want to chuck yourself out the fucking window and run all the way back to the city. This wouldn’t have happened had you taken the train, because if you had, there would’ve been food services and no one would be subject to hearing your stomach sing like it’s chewing out a small puppy in there. Life is nothing but an endless pit of embarrassment and despair.
Your arms hold themselves tighter around your frame, practically squeezing into your abdomen as you will it to please, please, please be quiet. Jungkook stares at you, and you can tell by the teeny tiny quirk of his lips that he’s trying to bite back a smile. He’s relaxed, but there’s still something hesitant on his face. It takes him a minute before he finally throws the question out.
“Do you want to go to that guksu place that we used-” that we used to go to, “you know the place. The one that’s right off the freeway?”
The sun is out today. The sky unfolds endlessly just outside the window, coloring blue everything your eyes land on. There are strips of clouds scattered here and there, like delicate strokes of white paint on an azure canvas. Even the winter cold has to soften.You bite into your cheek. Don’t think, that’s what he had told you.
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Not much about this quaint restaurant has changed. The quirky decorations are still where they used to be, the windows still the same unique stained glass that you never came across anywhere else. You remember the elderly woman who runs the place, even if she doesn’t have a single clue who you are. The golden retriever you used to fawn over every time you stopped by, sits quietly by the door and watches the cars pass by, his fur now graying as weariness begins to settle into those old bones.
You would’ve been displeased if the place had changed, because, well, you don’t like change. But then again, this familiarity is dangerous. It tricks you into thinking that everything is still the same, even you and him. Deludes you into believing that you’re still in love and that he’ll walk out of here holding your hand.
Regardless, the first spoonful has you biting back a smile.
“How is it?” Jungkook asks.
It makes you feel all warm inside, and then a little sad, nostalgic.
“Tastes just the same,” you tell him simply.
“Hmm.”
He lets you satisfy your hunger in peace. It’s the least he can do anyway.
There’s a wall near the back of the restaurant, where people could hang polaroids of themselves and cute handwritten notes. You think if you dig through the hundreds of photos scattered across the space, you might be able to find you and Jungkook there, if you two haven’t already been thrown out long ago to make room for new memories.
He pays for your food after you’re both finished, despite some protesting on your side. As you leave, you’re busy thinking that if you could have a moment to marvel at that far-back wall of memories, if you could find a photo of you and him there, you would probably sneak it into your coat pocket.
It’d be another thing to add to your pile of Jungkook memorabilia - the old clothes in the back of your closet, the stack of dusty polaroids at the bottom of your drawer. You wonder if he keeps anything of yours, maybe an old t-shirt that you forgot to take back. It’s probably unlikely, but a girl can hope.
You miss the way Jungkook glances back, thinking the exact same thing.
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You survive the rest of the drive with more ease, probably because of the food. You spend most of the remaining 2 hours leaning against the window, humming to the radio, closing your eyes but not really sleeping. You even forget to be nervous about what is to come.
That is, until the car pulls up to the venue.
It’s absolutely gorgeous, and a lot bigger than you imagined - a modern beach house overlooking the waters. It’s not as extravagant as one would expect to see when they come to a wedding, but considering the small crowd in attendance, this is more than enough. You see people rush in and out of the place even from far away - planners, caterers, the bridesmaids and groomsmen, probably.
You feel a bit comforted just watching this. His family seems to be doing a lot better than before. It’s nice to know.
You barely make it out of the car before someone calls your name, and pulls you into a hug that knocks the wind out of you. Although, when you catch the scent of her hair, you instantly know who it is.
Parents usually have a scent that’s distinct to only their kids, a scent so cozy and homely that no perfume can ever mask. You can only describe your mom’s scent with a feeling, specifically the feeling of your chest tightening, tingling with a bittersweetness that you never found elsewhere. 
Strangely enough, Jungkook’s mother has always made you feel the opposite. She makes you feel relieved to be in her embrace, like she accepts you for who you are even if all you are to her, at the end of the day, is a stranger.
You hug her back awkwardly, hesitantly, in front of Jungkook’s dad, his brother Junghyun, and a girl you don’t know. You assume that she’s the bride-to-be, the main character whom this weekend revolves around. Sooji, you remember that was the name on the wedding invitation.
You get choked up suddenly, eyes turning glassy though you quickly blink it away. You’re not sure if you’ve had someone be so happy to see you. Bypassers might even think that you just found the cure for cancer.
For a second there, you wonder if your mere presence has ever made your mother this overjoyed.
You look at Jungkook for help, silently asking him to rescue you. Who else are you supposed to turn to if not him?
He understands that look. “Okay, mom,” he says, entangling her arms from you with ease, “Y/N’s tired from the drive. Let’s let her rest, yeah? I’ll show her the room.”
She ignores her son. “Honey,” she says, brushing your hair away from your face so she could see you better. “Thank you for coming.” She used to insist that you call her “mom”, or at least by her first name because “Mrs. Jeon” was too formal for someone she considered family.
You now have to opt for the latter, because “mom” isn’t an option for you anymore.
“Thank you for inviting me, Mrs. Jeon,” you tell her with a smile. You’re not really sure what else to say, but it makes you a little sad just calling her that.
She opens her mouth before closing it again, seemingly about to jokingly scold you for the formality before she recognizes the bittersweet look in your eyes. She just smiles at you then. There’s not much to be done about it.
You don’t know if anyone else sees how the moment is weighed down. Probably not. Maybe it’s just you and her who share this sentiment.
Jungkook doesn’t wait for his mom anymore. Sons, typical. He wedges himself between the two of you like a bulldozer and leads you inside the house. 
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Even though all you have is an overnight bag, Jungkook carries it for you all the way up to your room, which is only down the hall from his. Then he disappears pretty quickly afterward, saying something about his best man duties and putting out fires. He seems apologetic as he tells you this, but it’s not like you’re expecting him to babysit you all weekend.
You bore yourself to death in your room for a while, before you remember you have to text Yoongi to let him know you got here safely. Though, you stop short of telling him that it was Jungkook who drove you here. It’s trivial enough, right? You don’t want Yoongi to feel bad over nothing. You do, however, inform Taehyung and Jimin when you text them about it, to which Jimin only responds with a preemptively disapproving ‘Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.’
When you get too stir-crazy, you wander outside, hoping to explore the beach before it gets dark and colder. You try to stay out of everyone’s way, because a good guest is a quiet guest. You seem to be doing a good job. No one notices you, not even Jungkook’s mom but that’s because she’s the person you actively want to avoid the most. You don’t know what you’d even say to her if she gets you alone.
Everything is hectic, as one can probably imagine when it comes to wedding preparations. You haven’t had anyone close to you get married yet, so it’s safe to say that you’re pretty much clueless about all of this. You wonder what it’ll be like when your big day comes around, if you even ever get married. You haven’t thought about it in a long time. Why would you? You don’t really have a reason to think about this. It’s much easier to picture Taehyung’s or Jimin’s wedding day than your own.
Your opinion on having kids still remains the same, and you were never one of those girls who daydreamed about having a big and extravagant wedding, but it’s not such a bad idea to ponder about. You still think marriage is a scary thing - it’s one of the biggest commitments a person could ever make - but you’re not entirely opposed to getting married. 
Why are you even mulling over this? Your time might never even come.
When you round the corner to get the steps that would lead you down to the beach, you run into Sooji and a woman holding a thick binder - must be a wedding planner. You give Jungkook’s future sister-in-law an awkward smile in greeting, which she returns much more gracefully before she tells the woman that she’ll be with her in a minute.
So now you’re stuck here, about to make small talk with a person you have never met before, and will likely never see again. Great. 
“Hi,” you say, extending a hand. “I haven’t had the chance to introduce myself. I’m Y/N.”
“I’m Sooji,” she replies warmly as she shakes your hand, and you have to stop yourself from being a little weirdo and thinking about how silky her hair looks up close. “You’re Jungkook’s… friend, right?”
You purse your lips before nodding with a chuckle. The pause tells you that she knows, and you wouldn’t be surprised if she’s uncomfortable having you here. 
“I’m sorry if this is weird. You probably don’t want a complete stranger at your wedding.”
Sooji shakes her head instantly, waving her hands around to dismiss your apology. “Please, it’s totally fine. Junghyun’s mom talked to me about it before we sent out the invites. I wouldn’t have agreed if I was really bothered. Don’t worry about it, seriously.”
“Why did you agree?” you ask, trying to sound as polite as possible. “You don’t know who I am.”
“I guess I was curious.” She shrugs, before laughing lightly as she says, “I used to think you weren’t real.”
“Huh?”
“She talks about you constantly. Never in front of Jungkook, of course. But she’s really fond of you, and you probably already know that doesn’t happen very often. She really does see you like a daughter. She made you sound too good to be true.”
You’re not sure how to respond to that. His mom still thinks about you, still talks about you after all this time. You’re just his ex-girlfriend, but she considers you her family. You don’t know what to do with this information nor the way it pinches your heart.
“I-” You purse your lips, fumbling with the responses in your head. You settle on a light laugh, because Sooji can probably tell that you’re struggling with the words too. “I have to be honest. I don’t know what to say to that.”
“You don’t have to say anything. I just thought you should know that you’re still very much loved here.” She gives you a kind smile, and it looks like she wants to tell you something else but decides against it in the end. Sooji’s eyes land somewhere behind you before she points in that general direction. “I have to go take care of an issue with the flowers, but look, Jungkook is here. Why don’t you ask him to show you around?”
And then she’s already off. Overall, what a… strange interaction.
You turn around to see Jungkook standing near one of the entrances to the house. As you watch him talk to someone - a bridesmaid, you assume, or just one of the other guests - you try not to think about the fact that there’s a stirring sensation in your stomach, and that it only intensifies when she throws her head back in a pretty laugh, a perfectly manicured hand landing on his arm like he’s the most charming person she’s ever met. 
You don’t give it a name, don’t label it green in color even though you’re blue and he’s golden sunshine. You don’t acknowledge that it’s a feeling, because doing so would make it real and there are certain truths that you’d rather delude yourself into thinking are lies.
When Jungkook’s eyes catch yours and he cuts off the woman mid-sentence with a curt excuse me, you don’t acknowledge that feeling either, but it’s warm and it blooms in your chest as he makes his way to you. It’s something victorious, something that tickles your ribs.
He comes to you like you’re a destination he’s been waiting all his life to reach, and you certainly, adamantly don’t acknowledge the spectacularly dizzying feeling that swallows you whole when he places a gentle hand on your arm, his voice soft as he says, “There you are. I was looking for you.”
The familiarity, it’s catastrophic.
“I was just walking around,” you tell him. “There’s not a lot to do here. I was bored.”
“You have me,” he says. Probably not in that way, but you’d like to think that’s how he means it. “I don’t have any more fires to put out. What do you want to do now?”
You glance over your surroundings, still set on your original plans. You wanted to go alone, but you suppose you can let him accompany you. You check the time on your phone before asking, “Can we go down to the beach? I wanna see if we can catch the sunset.”
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You used to do this whenever you came here to visit - walk along the beach, hand in hand, sunlight in your hair and the cool breeze holding you tight in the afterglow.
The keyword here is “used to”. Now, you have to stuff your hands in your pockets just so you don’t reach for him every time you shiver.
It’s late enough in the afternoon for you to see the moon faintly shine against a blue and orange backdrop. Sun and moon, together in the same frame. It feels symbolic somehow. You’re not really sure.
“The moon looks like an egg,” Jungkook observes astutely, taking casual strides next to you. It makes you burst into easy laughter, which makes him laugh with you too. You stop walking when you reach what you think is a good spot to watch the sky. 
“Let’s sit here for a bit,” you say. It’s not the greatest idea - sitting idly by would only make you colder - but you just want to stop and look at the sunset. Once you’re seated in the sand, you respond to his moon remark, “That’s true, y’know. NASA said so.”
“Yeah,” he says, settling down beside you, “you made me read that.”
You’d forgotten about it, and you didn’t think that he’d remember. It’s freezing cold and the moon looks like an egg, but you’re not thinking, and you feel safe. Nothing can hurt you here, or at least that’s what you’d like to tell yourself.
You wrap your arms around yourself to keep from shivering, but you still shiver anyways.
“Are you cold?” he asks.
“A little,” you admit. “I should’ve worn a thicker sweater. But it’s o-”
He doesn’t let you finish the sentence, just smoothly takes off his jacket to put it around your shoulders.
You put your hands atop his to stop him. When you touch him, there’s an electric tingle that almost makes you flinch. He feels warm, still resembling a human furnace. 
“No, you don’t have t-”
“Take the jacket, Y/N,” he says. “It’s just a jacket.”
The jacket smells like him. It only makes you want to crawl further into the warmth.
He seems more self-assured here, that’s what you notice. More like the version of himself that he used to be. Confident, sometimes borderline cocky. Annoying but oddly endearing, you came to love that about him.
His relaxed demeanor is understandable. You’re merely a visitor here, while this is his homeground. 
“I’m curious about something,” he says after a while.
“Okay.”
“What’s the deal with Wednesdays?” he asks. 
“You know how they say bad things come in threes?” You purse your lips, thinking it over, feeling something bitter in your mouth as you recall the events that led to this. “My parents got divorced on a Wednesday. I moved out of mom’s house on a Wednesday. And…” You hold your knees close to your chest as you hesitate to utter this last part, “we broke up on a Wednesday.”
You see the exact moment Jungkook mentally slaps himself, paling a couple shades as he tongues his cheek, not expecting his question to inadvertently lead back to this. It wasn’t your intention to guilt trip him. It was true that he dumped you on a Wednesday, but you don’t want the mood to turn sour, to have to mull over this again. Like he said, it will still be there for you to worry about when you get back. You’re not looking forward to returning to a shitshow, but what you’d hate even more is to tarnish the memories of this place just because you can’t keep from being vindictive for not even a weekend.
“I was born on a Wednesday too, so I guess bad things come in fours sometimes,” you continue, chuckling to yourself humorlessly.
A frown appears on his face almost instantaneously. “What is that supposed to mean?”
You shrug. Jungkook turns his body toward you, which makes you spare him a glance before you return your gaze to the horizon. His face is so serious that it’s almost funny. “Y/N,” he presses. “Why would you say that?”
��C’mon, it’s a joke. I was just being self-deprecating. Lighten up.”
“Why are you talking like that?”
“Like what? Contrary to popular belief, I don’t walk around with a thundercloud over my head all the time,” you laugh lightly. “I figured if there was a day to be nice to you, it should be today. And tomorrow, I guess.”
“This is you being nice?”
Funny how just a few weeks ago, you were fighting with him and calling him a hypocrite. Now, you’re sitting together, watching the sun set, trying not to be mean to him.
“I’m not picking a fight with you,” you say. “This is nice enough.”
“It’s not even my wedding.”
“Okay.” You glance at him again, letting words flow without a single thought. “I’ll be even nicer to you on your wedding day then.”
You don’t know where that even came from, but something aches the very second the words leave your mouth. The thought of him getting married one day makes you just nauseous, even though you always knew that it was a possibility. It might even be inevitable.
You clear your throat, waving the sullen feeling away. Your body shivers then, even after the added warmth of his jacket. Maybe you’re not shivering because of the cold anymore.
He doesn’t say anything, but you can feel his eyes linger on the side of your face. The both of you keep tiptoeing around an elephant that follows you wherever you go. 
You hug your knees close to your chest, watching the blue sky melt into the golden horizon, splattered with ribbons of cotton candy clouds.
You want to scooch closer to him and have him wrap his arm around your shoulders. This isn’t the spot where you used to draw your names in the sand, enveloped in a giant heart like two lovesick kids, but wouldn’t it be nice to imagine that it is?
“I was always really happy here,” you mumble to yourself.
You were, truly. This city was your pocket of hope, your piece of peace.
Being here brings back so many memories.
It’s the same feeling you get every time you pass by somewhere you used to live. The nostalgia of walking down the same road you used to walk every day until your shoes wore out. The familiarity of your surroundings. The bittersweetness of looking into a past you cannot hold anymore, of remembering the person you were at a certain period in your life, of knowing the things you do now that you didn’t back then.
You long for things you cannot change.
Nostalgia only grows stronger with time, you can always count on that.
He hums in agreement, before admitting quietly, “I miss you.” One pulls, the other pushes. The water wavers, like it’s touched by his words, simple but earnest. You’re touched too, somewhere in your heart, where you know you should be writing someone else’s name now.
Should?
“You’re pushing it,” you say softly.
“I know.”
You look at him. Maybe it’s because you’re back in the city that holds only good memories of you two. Maybe you’re hypnotized by the way the pink and purple hues kiss his side profile, making him feel like a fever dream and not someone you loved. Maybe it’s the cold, making you yearn for any source of warmth. But instead of returning his sentiment, you say, “It’ll pass.”
He meets your eyes. There’s something pleading in his gaze. All things pass eventually. Time moves forward, people move on. Bad things will pass sooner or later. Your worst heartbreak, your most arduous trials, your saddest moments, they will all pass.
And good things… good things will have to pass too, whether you like it or not.
Your fingers twitch from where they’re still holding onto your body. You itch to reach for his hand. You don’t tell him what he wants to hear, even though here’s a part of you that wants to say it back. In a better world, you would be telling him I love you too, instead of having to suppress an I miss you too.
“All things have to pass eventually. This will too.”
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[20:05] Taebear 🐻: we could go to that bar near the gallery. Y/N likes the cocktails there [20:06] Mimi 🐥: kay kay [20:06] Mimi 🐥: soooooo next friday? [20:09] Mimi 🐥: why is y/n reading our messages. shouldn’t she be at dinner [20:09] You: i approve of the bar choice [20:11] You: if you didn’t want me reading your messages, you shouldn’t have sent them to the gc [20:11] You: and if you must know, i’m skipping dinner. i’m avoiding Jungkook’s mom [20:12] Mimi 🐥: understandable. i figured you would do that [20:13] Mimi 🐥: how’s it going? are we regretting going yet? i told you to just stay home and we could binge watch the office together [20:15] You: and EYE told you that you could be a good friend and go to this wedding with me but nooooo baby doesn’t like the cold [20:16] You: you could’ve visited your parents while you’re here you know. two birds with one stone [20:18] Mimi 🐥: babes my parents stayed with me for a whole month last month. i reached my quota for family face time  [20:19] You: son and friend of the year 👏 [20:20] Mimi 🐥: 😎😎😎😘
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[20:22] Taebear 🐻: hey [20:23] You: uh oh. am i in trouble? why is this not in the gc? [20:25] Taebear 🐻: lol shut up [20:26] Taebear 🐻: you okay? [20:28] You: feels like that could’ve been a perfectly good question to ask in the gc [20:29] Taebear 🐻: because it’s a serious question and we both know Jimin can’t be serious for one minute to save his life [20:32] You: why does it have to be a serious question? 🤪 [20:32] Taebear 🐻: 😕 [20:33] You: stop pouting. i’m fine [20:35] Taebear 🐻: are you? [20:36] You: i am! you don’t have to go all mama bear on me [20:39] Taebear 🐻: ha ha ha. you’re so funny [20:40] Taebear 🐻: want me to call you? [20:42] You: i said i’m fiiiiiine 🙄 [20:43] You: but also no because i told everyone i was tired and i’m pretending to be asleep in my room right now [20:43] Taebear 🐻: okay [20:43] Taebear 🐻: did you eat something at least? [20:44] You: i have a cup ramen in my room [20:45] Taebear 🐻: okay [20:46] Taebear 🐻: how was today? did JK make you wanna strangle him? [20:48] You: okay Kim Taehyung at least act like you have some faith in your friend lol [20:50] You: but mmmmmm it was ok. he was mostly behaving himself [20:51] Taebear 🐻: mostly? [20:54] You: we were down at the beach and he just told me he missed me out of the blue [20:55] You: Mimi is asking why no one is replying to him  [20:57] Taebear 🐻: i can see that [20:58] Taebear 🐻: what did you tell JK? [21:01] You: i quoted fleabag to him [21:09] Taebear 🐻: i had to google that [21:10] Taebear 🐻: i still don’t know what that means [21:11] You: i know you don’t lol. you’re adorable [21:11] You: i’ll tell you when i get back.  [21:13] You: ok bye i have to sleep early or i’ll look like ass in the morning [21:14] Taebear 🐻: oh. okay [21:15] Taebear 🐻: sleep tight. remember not to gorge yourself on booze tomorrow [21:17] You: thanks for the reminder. love you mom 🙄💕 [21:17] Taebear 🐻: :) [21:20] Taebear 🐻: you won’t look like ass btw
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You clocked out right after you told Taehyung that you would. It wasn’t a peaceful sleep though. The anxiety simmering in your belly woke you up a few times throughout the night. You don’t even know why you were anxious. It’s not like you were the one who was about to walk down the aisle.
When morning finally came and you managed to untangle yourself from the surprising comfort of your familiar bed, you practically dragged your feet for the subsequent two hours, trying to get ready. As if that would actually slow down the passage of time.
You had to compartmentalize the things you needed to do in a mental checklist. Makeup. Hair. Dress. Stare at yourself in the mirror for half an hour and internally freak out while waiting for Jungkook to come get you from your room.
Now you’re sitting in the wedding hall, watching people filter into the room. It’s not even a lot of people, but you’re still overwhelmed regardless.
You feel so exposed, even though he’s the only one looking at you in this room of strangers. He’s been looking at you like that ever since he first saw you this morning, in a dress that you got just days before the wedding. You still don’t know if it’s entirely appropriate for your ex-boyfriend’s brother’s wedding - maybe a bit revealing - but it was the only one you could find on such short notice.
When you tried on the dress for Taehyung and Jimin a few days ago, Taehyung said you looked beautiful. Jimin said you looked decent, “six point five out of ten,” which translated to “pretty nice” in Jimin-lingo. That would’ve been enough if you were going to any other wedding, not one where Jungkook would also be attending.
You had wanted him to see you and regret ever leaving you.
It was a silly thought, just a tad adolescent.
You had wanted him to see you in your dress and be consumed with thoughts of you until he couldn’t even see straight. To be the only thing on his mind, you didn’t think it was a lot to ask for.
That was before he told you not to think about it and you’d been convinced to just go with the flow just for two days. It was before he actually did see you earlier today in your dress - a simple midnight blue satin cowl neck with a slit in the thigh - but you were the one rendered helpless and speechless. He had stared at you for a minute when he came to walk you down from your room, then he’d said, all breathless even though both of you were just standing there, “You’re beautiful.”
You’re beautiful, not You look beautiful.
You don’t know why, but you appreciated it.
It made your cheeks burn underneath your artificial rosy blush. Stupid, you thought to yourself when you two made your way to the main hall. Stupid for letting yourself get dizzy because of a single compliment from him.
You’re seated with his parents, which makes sense because you don’t know anybody here except for them. Well, maybe you know one of his cousins whose kid you and Jungkook used to babysit whenever their family was in the city, but you doubt that he even remembers you anymore.
When the ceremony begins, your heart instantly feels like it’s about to drop to the pit of your stomach.
You can’t lie to yourself. It stings.
It stings just sitting here next to his parents like a daughter-in-law, like a member of their family, watching his brother solidify his happy ending.
It stings that Jungkook is standing up there, looking as handsome as ever, but his eyes aren’t on the couple. They keep flickering to you no matter how much you try to pretend that they don’t.
It stings that even though you don’t think about marriage often - or maybe you just don’t allow yourself to - you can’t deny that the thought does cross your mind from time to time. Any time that you’d wander the corridors inside your head, you’d pass the doors that you keep unopened on purpose but there’s always that one door marked with a bright red X that you can never sidestep.
You watch Junghyun and Sooji with their teary smiles and shaky hands, shaky but happy. There’s a sudden clarity that this could’ve been you and him in another life. Forever is a lie, but you would’ve perjured yourself a thousand times for him. I do - you would’ve meant it.
You imagine yourself in Sooji’s place, and Jungkook, standing right on the other side, holding both your hands in his. A beautiful and radiant bride terrified of the altar. A dashing groom with a smile that could rival the sun and shoulders weighing heavier than he lets on.
It would’ve looked clumsy, but it could’ve been right.
You wonder if he’s wondering the same thing. Maybe he is. You hope he is.
When the ceremony ends with a kiss shared between the newlyweds, you wipe away the tears that well up in your eyes. The people around you do the same thing, but they’re doing it for the right reason, out of genuine joy for the happy couple. You don’t think you can say the same for yourself.
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Some of the bridesmaids fawn over him. It’s reasonable, you suppose. One tends to do that in the presence of Jeon Jungkook.
You watch as they come up to him one by one to ask him to dance, watch as he politely declines until they’re all stalking away with similar pouts on their faces. You watch him until his eyes lock on you, sitting at a table near the back, nursing a glass of champagne.
He weaves himself with ease through the people making their way to the dance floor. When he’s in front of you, he holds out a hand.
“Dance with me?” he asks, his doe eyes working overtime to lure you in with their sparkles, though you’d rather stay here where you can easily go unnoticed until the night ends. “One song?”
“I don’t know how,” you say, even as you’re taking his hand and standing up.
“I showed you how, remember?”
“That was a long time ago.”
He squeezes you reassuringly. “Just follow my lead,” he says, walking the both of you to the floor. “C’mon.”
Once the music starts, your heels stomp on his feet at least three times before you start finding the beat to move along to. Muscle memory, or whatever, is bullshit. You remember absolutely nothing of what he showed you.
You’re grateful that the song is slow, because it makes it easier for you to follow the beat with your two left feet. He takes one of your hands in his, the other settling on the small of your back, guiding you to move in a steady rhythm.
You feel his mother’s eyes on the two of you, because she must be somewhere nearby, watching you like a hawk. You feel his gaze on your face while you keep yours on the knot of his tie, just trying to keep your composure and to not step on his feet with your heels.
The blur of white that you catch from the periphery of your vision makes you turn your head. Sooji and Junghyun are close by, swaying together slowly to the soft music, both of them glowing with happiness. She must sense your eyes on her, because she lifts her gaze up to meet yours. She smiles at the sight of you and Jungkook, and you smile back, because you don’t know how else to respond to that.
You don’t say it, but you do think it. Your fingers tighten around his hand ever so slightly.
Could that have been us?
If the answer is yes, then it would hurt.
If the answer is no, then it would hurt.
The point of your story is that it’s painful however you choose to look at it. There’s no other way to frame it. It’s just painful, because you’re never going to get any of it back.
You bite your lip, then turn away from the happy couple but you still don’t look at Jungkook. You look at your hand in his, and that’s when you see it.
“How’d you get that?” you ask, gently tracing the inch of slightly raised skin on his knuckles. You never noticed the scar until now.
“It was four years ago, I think? After Taehyung and I almost got into a fight, I went outside and… punched a wall,” he says, wincing as he recalls the memory.
His answer takes you aback. “You and Taehyung got into a fight?”
“Almost,” he corrects. “It was a long time ago. Didn’t they tell you?”
“No, they didn’t say anything. What happened?”
“Nothing happened.”
“If it was really nothing, you wouldn’t have punched a wall.” You frown. It makes you miss a few beats, but the song isn’t what’s important now, even if Jungkook is still trying to steer you back into the dance. “Taehyung isn’t violent. You aren’t violent.”
“I’m serious,” he says finally. “It’s nothing. We were just drunk and stupid.”
You know there must be more to it, that something must have happened or been said to trigger such a reaction from both of them. But you also know that you won’t probably get anything out of Jungkook if he doesn’t want to tell you.
You give up, for now. “Fine. If you say so.”  You’ll just have to weasel it out of Jimin later.
The song comes to an end, before another one comes on. If Jungkook remembers that he only asked for one song, maybe he’s counting his blessings that you’re still here and dancing with him, because he doesn’t mention it.
For some reason, you pull your hand away from his, only to slide up his shoulder to lock both of your hands behind his neck. He seems surprised, but he does the same around your waist.
Jungkook’s gaze flickers to your lips briefly, then back to your eyes again. You find yourself doing the same and wonder what he tastes like after all the time you’ve been apart. Is he still as sweet as you remember? You used to tease that it was because of the excessive sugar he put in everything, but you knew it was really just him. The few inches between you are so inviting that it’s practically tempting you to close the gap. You could, easily in fact. Blame it on one too many glasses of champagne later if you want.
He looks younger like this, like the boy you loved, starry eyes and dimpled smile. His shoulders are always the most comfortable resting place, the crook of his neck your long lost home. This is nice, you think, to see him again even though it feels like a fever dream. Memories of your first date, your first kiss, come to life before your eyes so realistically that you could almost touch them.
Loved? That sounds funny to you.
The people you used to be, souls wrapped in innocence, when the world was nothing but the arms of the person you loved. You reach out, and the memories quickly fade from view. The only trace they leave behind is a speck of gold on your fingertips, a memento of charming naiveté for you to tuck neatly away in the corner of your mind, but also a reminder that ah, they only exist in the locket of your heart now. Because he has changed, and you think you must have too. Life, as they say, goes on.
“We made it. Kind of. That’s crazy,” you find yourself saying.
“Did we?”
“You don’t think so?” you chuckle. “We’re in a group chat with the Kim Seokjin who spams it with bad jokes on a daily basis. I’d call that a win.”
That makes him laugh. “If you put it like that, yeah, maybe. Sure.”
Other people might be fooled, but it doesn’t sound at all convincing to you. The light doesn’t really reach his eyes. You bite the inside of your cheek, thinking of how to translate the sudden poignant turn of the moment.
“It isn’t everything you hoped it’d be?” you ask.
His shoulders rise then fall quickly in a second-long shrug. “I thought it would make me feel more… fulfilled. But it doesn’t. Not really.”
The way he says it and the way he’s looking at you makes your heart dive. You understand what he means. You’re good at what you do, and you don’t need reassurance from anyone to recognize that. But sometimes, it doesn’t feel like it’s enough. Doesn’t feel like it’s real, like it’s validated.
When you landed your first big project, even before Yoongi, you were so proud of yourself. You were bursting with excitement but you weren’t happy, and you knew what the reason was. Something was missing that couldn’t be filled, not even with all your friends’ hundreds of messages of encouragement. 
It’s beyond stupid, this feeling like your wins amount to nothing at all just because of one person. You wanted him there to celebrate every achievement with you and he wasn’t, and the milestones seemed incomplete without the presence of him. It doesn’t feel like you’ve accomplished anything because this always used to be a dream you thought you’d make come true together.
“It’s lonely,” he concludes.
It sounds like he feels the same way, like he wanted you to be there too.
He suddenly holds you tighter than you think he needs to, like he’s afraid to let go of you. You imagine that he doesn’t want to let go of you, and it makes you feel better for a second. But it doesn’t change the fact that he still did in the end. And he will have to when this ends.
What was the point of this? Why did he bring this upon yourselves when he seems to be as hurt as you are? All of this time, all of these years, lost to what? You could’ve been happy together but instead, you were both lost and miserable.
When the music stops - you lost count of how many songs it’s been - you pull away from him. He looks disappointed, maybe even a little hurt for some reason.
“I’m gonna get some air,” you say, already turning away from him.
“Y/N-”
“I need some air.” Then you’re weaving through the dancing couples despite Jungkook calling your name. How did he manage it? How did he not look back when you called out for him?
You hastily grab your coat on the way out. It’s not going to keep you warm, but that’s not something you’re even remotely concerned with.
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It’s everywhere, you feel it down to your bones.
The wind wraps itself tightly around you, intertwining in your hair, slipping through the cracks of your fingers, caressing your face in a chilling touch. You greet the cold like a long lost sister, shivering violently with nostalgia. It was there for you more than your own flesh and blood.
Is that why you like the sea at night? Because it reminds you of mom?
It’s dark out here, barely anything is visible except for a lighthouse sending out light in the quiet of the night. You can’t see much, but you can certainly hear it. You’re not sure if the music is coming from inside the venue, or if it’s still ringing in your ears. It’s probably the latter; you’re too far away to be able to catch the music anyway. But regardless, the tune is quickly drowned out by the sea.
The waves crash violently against the shore like it’s out for blood. There’s a magnetic pull, as if it’s calling out for you. You want to go to it, to reach out and feel the cold outside of your body for once, but you stay there despite your legs itching to stand up and run straight ahead. Into the water and down under.
You could lie down and close your eyes for a moment. The sound of the water, as sharp and brutal as it is, nurtures a part of you somehow.
You just want to be alone. You don’t want to talk to Taehyung, or Jimin, or even Yoongi.
Oh.
Yoongi.
It’s a terrible feeling, knowing that you’re going to hurt Yoongi. Knowing that you’re going to kill this even before it has a chance to truly begin.
Truth be told, you can’t envision a future with Yoongi. There isn’t anything wrong with him, because he’s not the problem here. Yoongi is fun, he’s considerate, he keeps things light on purpose for you, until you’re ready to initiate something more serious. He’s good for you, even Taehyung thinks so.
But you can’t love Yoongi, not in the way that he wants you to. Not more than you love Jungkook.
There you go. Ruining things again.
Did you ruin Jungkook? Is that what happened?
The layers on you are no match for the sea at night. The wind hisses relentlessly, biting at any part of your skin that’s exposed.
It takes you back to that night. Almost everything does, actually.
Maybe that’s why you never even stopped to consider starting anything with anyone, because it always ends. If there’s a beginning, then there will be an inevitable ending. Love isn’t made to last and you aren’t meant to carry love with you. You’ve been abandoned twice. If it happens a third time, it’s a pattern, and then your hypothesis will only be proven. That the problem here is you.
You’d be lying if you said you haven’t wondered when it’ll finally be Taehyung’s turn to leave. He eventually will, right? That one’s gonna hurt.
Then, you’re startled when someone calls your name.
“What’s wrong?” Jungkook asks. The wind and the waves masked the sound of his footsteps walking up to you. When you turn around to face him, his eyes grow worried, almost panicked. “Why are you crying?”
You breathe out irritatedly before you hastily wipe at your cheeks. You didn’t even realize that you’d been crying. “Nothing’s wrong. I’m fine,” you say, though you both know it’s a lie. “I’m just tired. I’m going up to my room.”
He catches your wrist in a firm grip when you try to walk away. You wish he’d just leave you alone, but you knew he wouldn’t drop it just like that.
“I said I’m fine,” you insist.
“You were crying,” he says. “Did I do something wrong?”
He didn’t, at least not tonight.
God, you really don’t want to do this right now.
“Jungkook,” you warn. “Let go of me.”
You try to free yourself from his grip, hoping that he’ll get the hint and back off for now. Instead, he pulls you into his chest, where you struggle to escape from his hold until you realize your efforts are futile. He takes the wind’s place, wound tightly around you, so tightly that it’s nearly impossible for you to move.
You hiss out his name, but he doesn’t budge. 
“Jungkook, can you just- Fuck!”
Damn him.
You realize he’s not giving up, which in turn makes you give up struggling, hoping that if you let this be a moment, then it’ll be something that can pass.
You’re just standing there, letting him hold you, letting yourself be held by the person who broke you in the first place. This feels exactly like where you’re supposed to be - in his arms, with your face hidden in the crook of his neck, his gentle fingers stroking your hair. There’s not a lot that you could do but lean into that feeling the same way you lean into him. One foot in the sand, one foot in the past. A hand on the doorknob of time, wondering if you should look back or look forward.
You want to be alone, but that never used to apply with him.
The wind stills, the sea calms. You remain unmoving too, locked in his embrace. You feel the faint rhythm of his heart, beating faster than you think it should. If you could, you would bottle this moment up and live there forever.
I miss you, you think.
I miss you.
I miss you.
I miss you.
Then your arms are around him too. It only makes him hold you tighter, and all you can think about is how much you miss him, how painful it is to miss him, how you feel like you’re being pulled apart at the seams from the weight of missing him. 
Fuck.
Can you pretend that the last few years never happened? Is there a higher power that would allow you to go back to the night before that wretched Wednesday, when everything was still perfect? Hundreds of days of your life, can you pretend that it was just one long nightmare? When you wake up, you’ll be back in his humble apartment, tangled up together in his bed. Warm sunlight, your silken youth, and him. It was all you ever needed.
Again with the devastating familiarity. The city, the beach. His mother’s warmth that always made you reminisce about your own mother’s coldness. How Jungkook used to find you in moments like this and just stayed by your side until the dejection passed. He understood that he could never understand it the way you did.
You hear yourself sniffle, then you feel him press a kiss into your hair. Home is comforting.
Oh, you never want to leave.
You don’t want to leave, and that’s terrifying.
You allow yourself to stay there for one more second - one endless second - so you could commit to memory what it’s like to be with him. Back and forth. It’s always so easy to fall into him.
Jungkook releases you when he feels you loosen after a while, and you reluctantly meet his eyes as he tilts your head to face him.  His fingers cradling your jaw, how warm and delicate they feel on your skin.
You swallow thickly, your mind going blank. He’s the only person you see, the only one that matters. His eyes flicker south, and even then you don’t make any move to run away, despite his loose grip on your waist telling you that you can if you want to.
You told him that it would pass, and maybe for him, it will. For him, it’s the city and the moment, making him feel like he’s caught up in a page that he’s turned over a long time ago. He was fine with leaving, and he’s been fine without you. It will pass for him, as much as it hurts you to admit it.
But not for you. For you, there’s only him. There’s nobody else but him. It’s always been him, no matter how hard you try to tell yourself that there will be another person you can love as much as you love Jungkook. You might only be a page, perhaps even a chapter, in the story of his life, but he’s your entire book. He’s volume after volume after volume, until he takes up the whole shelf and leaves no room for anything else, not even for yourself.
And now here he is - at the biggest turn in your career.
He’s a bad blood cell you can’t ever get rid of.
You’ll never be able to truly let go of him. How could you? When you truly love someone, those feelings will carry on forever. They’ll always have a piece of your heart despite an ending. When you look back on a certain period in your life, you’ll think to yourself, You’ll always be a part of me. I loved you then.
But Jungkook is a force of nature. He has your whole heart.
Years and years from now, when you look back on your life, you know you’ll see him everywhere. Even when you’re old and gray, and when faces all just blur together in a mosaic of broken memories and long lost youth, you know you’ll still remember him - the person you loved, the one whom you let slip through your fingers. The great love of your life when you were young.
Sometimes, you regret that day. You can’t help feeling like it was your fault too. Maybe you should’ve tried harder to keep him. You should’ve fought harder, should’ve held onto him instead of standing there and watching him leave.
He lit the match, and you let the house burn. It takes two to tango, two to break a heart.
You’re quick to let people leave. Oh, how you wish it could be that easy to let them go too.
It isn’t until your eyes mimic the flicker of his gaze that he leans in. You meet him halfway. For the first time in years, you feel like you could breathe, truly breathe. It’s achingly slow, like neither of you can believe that this is happening. 
You sigh against his mouth when his tongue brushes your bottom lip, slips past the seal to devour you. It feels like a perfect dream. You could stay in this bubble with him forever, pretend that you’re the only two people who exist in the world and there’s nothing else, no one else, waiting for you in a city that seems so far away right now. The thought of him never left you, not even for a second. He’s always been with you everywhere you go, no matter what you do, always in the back of your mind.
He tastes like your youth, like remembrance. He kisses you like he’s still yours when deep down you know that you’re still his. The hand on your jaw is gentle but firm, and it makes you repeat a thought, I miss you.
Then a feeling, I love you.
Not then. Now.
I love you now.
I love you even when I shouldn’t. Even when it hurts. Even when you leave me. Even when you don’t love me more than I love you. If there comes a day where you love somebody else, I will still love you then. There will never be another person for me but you. My first and only love.
When he pulls away, you think it’s too quick, even though your lungs are grateful for the breath that you instantly inhale. You stare at his lips like you’re in a daze, mesmerized, wanting to chase them again. You don’t even know how you have it in yourself to utter these next words, but you hear your own voice saying them anyway.
You’re holding onto him now. Doesn’t that count?
“Let’s…” Your fingers tighten on the collar of his dress shirt. “Let’s go up to your room.”
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note (2): so... what do we think?? will they?? won't they?? 😵 stay tuned for obs7.5 which will be dropping 29.09.2023! also i'm gonna pause obs muse asks for a little bit! 😬
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all rights reserved © jeonqkooks. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted september 24, 2023]
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loquaciousferret · 1 year
Text
Little Games
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Summary: Agent Peña reaches breaking point after your not-so-subtle teasing around the office, deciding to teach you a lesson you won't be quick to forget.
Pairing: Javier Peña x F!Reader
Content Warnings: 18+ ONLY, smut, degradation, name-calling, rough unprotected sex, semi-public sex, orgasm denial, Javi being mean. As always- maybe more! Read at own risk
Word Count: 1.2k
A/N: Javi pulled me out of my Joel thots today, enjoy this short piece of filth
MINORS DO NOT PRESS KEEP READING
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“Cut the shit!” Javi’s palm slams into the wall behind your head.
You could see how the man would be terrifyingly intimidating, if this hadn’t been your goal all along.
“What’s wrong, agent?” You gaze back at him innocently with wide eyes, his cock twitching just at the sight.
“Don’t give me that.” He snaps, grabbing your wrist and pinning it against the wall after you had tried to reach out and push his chest back lightly to create space between you.
You blinked. You wouldn’t give in yet.
“Just admit it.” He hisses through gritted teeth, “You may be stupid but not too stupid to know what you’re doing.”
You can barely keep a straight face, it’s practically painful trying to hold back the defiant smirk that wants to creep its way onto your lips.
“I’m sorry Agent, don’t you think I’m doing a good job?” You said, holding on to the pretence a little longer.
“Cut the act.” His tone is menacing. “You know you do a great job, staying late whenever I do, doing my paperwork faster than any of the other agents just so you can come back and see me sooner. Hovering around me in those ridiculously short skirts, driving me crazy. Maybe HR should talk to you like a grown up about professional dress codes.”
“You don’t like how I dress?” You said, playing dumb for him.
“Shut the fuck up.” He gripped your jaw and tilted your face up to him.
“Is this a game to you?”
Involuntarily, your tongue darts out to lick your lips. He can’t bear to look at you any longer and spins you round so you face the wall.
“I’m gonna teach you a lesson.” His hand was roughly separating your thighs, spreading your legs forcefully. “Maybe you’ll learn not to start something if you don’t plan on finishing it.”
You moaned as one of his large hands started to put pressure on your already wet pussy, through your thin underwear. He pushed it aside and thrusted two fingers inside you roughly. You gasped and he hissed at you to “Cierra el Pico.”
Of course he had seen you coming from a mile away that morning, wearing a black pencil skirt that barely grazed your mid thigh, and a white blouse under your blazer that clearly showed the outline of your lace bra. Most of the department were away at an incident, and management had been scheduled in with the President. Being a secretary, you knew everyone’s schedules, and you knew today was the perfect day to take your little game with Agent Peña up a notch. He would already be in a bad mood, frustrated that he had been benched while most of the other agents were out potentially getting into some action today. You used this existing frustration to your advantage and that’s how you ended up here right under his grasp where you had wanted to be all along.
You heard him unbuckling his belt with his free hand and you shuddered with excitement. He removed his fingers from inside you and gripped your panties, pulling them down your legs roughly. You stepped out of them when they hit your ankles and he picked them up, stuffing them into his pocket. You smirked, suspecting that he wouldn’t return them following this encounter.
He pressed on your upper back, folding you more so that your ass stuck out and your chest was pressed to the wall. Your breathing faltered as he slid his erection through your wet folds and lined himself up with your entrance. He pushed into you with no mercy and you whined, unprepared after using his fingers on you for such a short time.
“I thought I told you to shut up.” He sneered.
He immediately set a punishingly harsh pace, pressing you hard into the wall as you held both your hips, guiding you back onto his cock to increase the force of each rough thrust of his cock.
You chewed on your lip to silence your moans of pleasure, there was only one locked door between yourself and Javier and a corridor that could contain government officials at any moment.
“Is this what you thought would happen when you started your little game, huh?” He goaded, continuing to slam into you harshly.
You couldn’t come up with anything clever to say in response, overwhelmed by the intense pleasure he was giving you.
“You can dress up and pretend to be whoever you want but look at you now, huh. Just a whore under all those fancy clothes as soon as someone sticks their cock inside you.”
“Only you, Sir.” You manage to get out, releasing a stifled moan.
He scoffs at that but the intensity of his thrusts somehow increased, as if the idea turned him on even more. If this wasn’t him at his worst then you didn’t think you would be able to handle whatever that would feel like.
He kept one hand on your hip but moved the other round your front to play with your clit, rubbing and applying pressure in circles around the sensitive spot.
“Do you think you deserve to cum?” He challenged.
You nodded, unable to speak for fear of crying out in pleasure.
“Really? After all that teasing? You think I should make you feel good?” He chuckled.
“I think I’d rather leave you frustrated all day, let you play with yourself tonight and wish it was me touching you.”
You whined, “Please, Javi-“
“Listen to yourself,” He taunted, and you could hear his smirk. “Willing to beg for it, you little whore.”
As soon as your orgasm started to build, your legs stiffening and your pussy clenching around him, he removed his fingers from your clit.
You whined at the loss of contact and he laughed and tutted, “This is what happens when you try and involve me in your slutty little games.”
He went quiet then, done taunting you and instead focussed on chasing his own release, slamming his cock into you as deep as it could go, your warm tight cunt getting him closer to his orgasm with every single thrust.
“Gonna fill you with my cum, remind you all day what I did to you.”
You nodded, whining, your pleasure reaching an absolute high.
After a few more thrusts, his pace faltered, and you felt his warm release inside you as he grunted, stilling inside you while he caught his breath.
He pulled out of you and you felt his load trickling down your inner thigh slowly.
“Make yourself presentable.” He ordered as he tucked his cock back inside his jeans and refastened his belt. “And leave me alone, I have more important things to do today than deal with you.”
He unlocked the door and slipped out of the disused file room back into the office. Your mind was already whirring, planning on how you could get him to do this to you again.
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Text
LMK!Wukong: The Game.
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Word Count: 1078.
Content/Trigger Warnings: Clingy Wukong acting like a baby.
Authors Notes: Based on that one (TikTok?)video with the lady and her adorable clingy kitty. It felt very LMK!Wukong coded, so I couldn't help myself. Hope you enjoy! And don't be shy, feel free to request whatever you want!
<---Previous | Masterlist | Next--->
The vibe of Flower Fruit Mountain was rather peaceful in the past few hours. The little monkeys didn't come to bother you or anything today, which made you a bit suspicious. Wukong wasn't any different though, still the same old monkey, clinging to you like a child with its favourite toy. Not that you minded your boyfriend’s embrace, but being able to scratch your nose would have been nice.
You were on the internet when you saw the inspiration to do something… fun. You glanced at your Monkey King and smiled a bit as he repeatedly nuzzled into your stomach. You moved to sit up on the bed and stretched, which made him briefly let you go so he could do the same. When he was about to bury himself back into you, that's when you struck and stopped him. 
“What?” Wukong looked at you in confusion with a small frown when you didn't allow him to cuddle you. “Did I do something wrong?”
“Stay,” you warned, which made him twitch in excitement at the challenge. The way his tail moved and how his eyes zeroed in on you made him look like a wild animal ready to pounce and not let go till your body stopped moving… Well, in this case till you stop resisting.
“No,” he said yet again like the stubborn little monkey he was.
“Stay,” you repeated, which made the Monkey King pout like a baby. “Don't look at me like that.”
“Mine,” he whined as he opened his arms in an attempt for you to collapse into him. 
Not today. 
“No,” you warned again.
“Not mine?” he teared, you had to give him credit, his guilt trip game was fire.
“Yes yours, but no touchy,” you assured him and tried not to laugh.
“Why?” he whined, but listened to you nonetheless, which surprised you greatly. He showed more self-control today than you gave him credit for.
“No,” you stood firm, wanting nothing more than to see where his limit for the day was.
“Mine…” He pouted at you, his lip quivered, and he looked like he was about to cry. It hurt your heart and soul… But you knew him too well to fall for that. 
“We're gonna play a game, okay?”
“No, mine,” his quivering pout turned stubborn, his arms still open till you lowered them by his wrist with your index fingers.
“We're playing a game,” you said more forcefully, not giving him the choice.
“Mmm,” he whined, but it's a potential game with you, and he’s Wukong, so he let you continue.
“It's called keep hands to self, okay?” 
“No!” he snapped immediately. 
“Volume!” you snapped back.
“Don't care!” he snapped back.
He’s such a child for such an old monkey. You mused to yourself.
He wanted you in his arms! He didn't want to play a stupid game that required him to have you right there but not be able to touch you. He was offended you'd even suggest something like that.
“Too much of a coward?” you smirked and raised a challenging brow that made him flinch. “Maybe you're too weak to be able to do such a simple task?”
“No…” he grumbled and folded his arms as he looked away. 
He's so predictable… I admit I wanna kiss him right now though… you thought to yourself and decided to reward the Monkey King a bit when you were done torturing him.
“C'mon~ surely my big strong Monkey King, Great Sage Equal to Heaven won't be bested by a tiny little game,” you worked his ego, and as it always did, it worked.
“Fine, I'll play your stupid game…” he caved, but his fingers intertwined with yours.
“That-that means your hands too,” you were trying so hard not to laugh as you pulled your hand away from his.
“What?” He narrowed his eyes again.
“Yeah, that includes your hands too,” you told him and removed your hand from his. “Keep hands to self, remember?”
“I don't like this game!” he protested and reached to grab your face, but you were faster and grabbed his wrists.
“My face as well, no touching my face,” you spoke and moved his hands to his lap.
It really hurt you to deny him, the adorable pouting baby opened his arms in an attempt to get you to give in first, but you stood strong.
“No hugging,” you mused.
“Ugh,” he glared at you but kept still with his hands on his lap. You could tell it was taking everything in the Monkey King not to just jump you and be over with. The proof was in the way his tail twitched and swayed in annoyance… and the fact that his entire body was shaking like a chihuahua. 
“Good job!” the second the words left your mouth, that's exactly what he did… jump you.
“Finally!” he said as he squeezed you in his arms, but not so tightly that you'd be uncomfortable and want another reason to leave his arms again.
“W-wait, we’re not done yet!” you laughed and tried to get through to him, but it was clear to see that you had lost. 
“We are done,” he said firmly and buried his face into your stomach.
“I'll tell you when-  I'll tell you-” You still tried to peel him off of you, but he was stuck to you like Flex tape.  “I'll tell you when the game is over,”
“It is over,” he pulled back a bit to speak but buried his face into your stomach again. 
“No, no, no,” you laugh, “let's just try it,”
“No, mine!” he held on firmly.
“But-”
“Mine!” he yelled as he squeezed you more.
“Gods dammit,” you swore with a laugh as you gave in and stroked your fingers through his bed head. “Okay, okay, you win.”
“Mine~” he smirked up at you and moved up to bury his face into your neck. 
“All yours, silly monkey,” you chuckled at his display.
Honestly, you couldn't resist him, just as much as he couldn't resist you. You snuggled into his furry chest and took in the scent of your conditioner he kept stealing. You felt at peace at that moment, and it didn't take long for the tired hero to KO. Not only that, but you still couldn't escape, even with him asleep. Not that you minded, you revelled in your Monkey King seeking your comfort and love. That was the bare minimum he deserved.
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python333 · 8 months
Text
soft spot — python333
— — — —
synopsis you've been having a bad day, and ghost feels like being extra nice to you. plot twist you're an age regressor and him being so nice is NOT helping.
relationships platonic agere cg!ghost & gn little!reader.
characters ghost.
word count 6.7k.
warnings a victorious reference, age regressor reader, usage of c/n [call sign/code name], 2nd person pov [you/yours/yourself]
note please feel free to attack me as much as you want if this is inaccurate. i don't even care if it's not constructive criticism. i am begging for everyone's thoughts and opinions on this!! this is also the longest oneshot i think i've ever written!
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“Having fun there?” 
You turn in your seat and find Ghost leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed and one eye slightly wider than the other—an indication that his eyebrow is raised. 
“Not really,” You answer, setting down your gun. You’d been disassembling it, trying to take your mind off of the slowly growing headache that’s been building up for the past few hours. You don’t think it’s a migraine or anything, but it still bothers you greatly. 
“Yeah, no, I can tell,” Ghost chuckles, pushing himself off of the door frame and walking over to you. He eyes your gun for a moment, the magazine already removed as well as any live rounds left in the rifle ejected, and the bolt locked to the rear. You were only maybe a quarter of the way through your disassembly, even though you started around thirty minutes ago. 
For some reason, you woke up upset today. You were too tired, you felt awfully sluggish, and there was a throbbing pain clustered in the back of your eyebrows. So, in short—you were reasonably very upset. It showed visibly in the way your eyes twitched every so often, and in the way you felt the need to pinch the bridge of your nose to distract you from the pain that was still building up behind your brows. 
“What’s going on?” He asks, leaning on the table. 
“I have this headache that won’t go away,” You respond, sighing as you move your gaze from your gun to Ghost. You can barely see it, but from his eyes you can tell that his face scrunches up beneath his mask. He knows a thing or two about bad headaches, being someone who frequently gets migraines himself. 
“Have you taken any meds for it?” You shake your head ‘no’. Ghost holds up a single finger in a ‘one moment’ motion and rummages through the pockets on his tactical vest for a moment, before he pulls out a small bottle of ibuprofen no bigger than his palm. He hands it to you. 
“Here.” You blink at it for a moment. 
“Thanks,” You take the bottle gingerly and Ghost nods, watching you as you struggle with the child-proof lid for a second before getting it open. You shake out a small tablet, one the size of a low-dosage aspirin, and pop it into your mouth. You don’t have much of an issue dry-swallowing it, and it only takes one attempt before you successfully swallow the tablet.
“You’ve been feeling pretty bad this whole week, haven’t you?” Ghost frowns underneath his mask. 
You think for a moment before nodding, “Yeah, I guess. I think it’s mostly just stress.” 
You know it’s not just stress. 
For a while now, you’ve used something called ‘age regression’ as a form of stress relief. You don’t know exactly when it started, but you do know that it was before you were recruited for the 141. And originally, you made a promise to yourself that you wouldn’t regress while on base, and you kept that promise for maybe a month before you broke it. 
You think it was Ghost that was the trigger, actually. You can vividly remember the first time you regressed while on base; you had just finished talking to Ghost, and he called you something—you think he called you something similar to ‘kid’—that made a flip in your mind switch immediately. You can remember excusing yourself from the conversation quickly, leaving your lieutenant slightly confused but otherwise unbothered by the strange action. 
And, worst of all, you can remember being in your quarters and practically burrowing under your blankets. You were curled up into a fetal position, trying to fight the urge to suck on your thumb or at least chew on something, but ultimately lost the fight and succumbed to your urges. You spent maybe a few hours like that, wide awake when you just wanted to try and sleep it away, thinking about that interaction you had with Ghost over and over again. 
You’re not stupid. You know that Ghost has some sort of soft spot for you—albeit, you don’t know exactly how soft that soft spot is, but it’s definitely soft. Soft enough that he goes the tiniest bit easier on you compared to other recruits, soft enough that he spares you more time than he does for others, and the most obvious of all—he initiates most of your conversations. 
Contrary to popular belief, he’s not the scary super-soldier most people think of him as. Sure, maybe he is kind of scary, and maybe his mask does jumpscare you when you’re doing missions in particularly dark spaces sometimes, but other than that he’s not scary in the slightest. If anything, he’s awkward. Awkward enough that he’s almost never the first person to talk to someone—except for you, of course. You don’t know why he acts so differently around you, but you don’t complain about it. 
“That’s rough,” Ghost looks down at you with concerned, empathetic eyes, “Sorry you’re so stressed. Mind me askin’ why?” 
“I don’t, but I also don’t know why I’m so stressed,” You huff out, even though you know the answer completely. You stand up, “I think it’s just me being sleep deprived. I’ve been having the tiniest bit of trouble falling asleep lately.” 
“You should’ve told me earlier,” Ghost tuts, “I have melatonin.” 
You give him a confused look. “You do?” 
“‘Course I do.” 
You blink at him for a moment before sighing, “Could I have some then?” 
“What’s the magic word?” You give him an unimpressed look, ignoring the way the words make your stomach twist, and his eyes crinkle in a way that lets you know that he’s grinning under his mask. 
“Could I please have some melatonin?” 
“The magic word was lotion, but I’ll let it slide,” Ghost hums, “There’s some in my office. I’ll grab it for you later.” 
“M’kay,” You look over at the door, unintentionally zoning out as you do. Your vision goes unfocused as the throbbing pain behind your eyebrows grows and something else grows inside of you. 
Jesus. Why can’t you choose any other time to get the urge to slip into a younger mentality? Why does your headache have to make everything worse for you? Why does Ghost have to be so nice and helpful? 
“Hey,” Ghost frowns, tapping a finger on your shoulder to snap you out of whatever trance you’re in, “[c/n]?” 
Oh God. 
Your eyes—that you try desperately to keep neutral—meet Ghost’s, his eyes soft and his eyebrows dipped downwards in a confused manner. His eyes are searching, flitting over you, trying to find something. The way he looks at you makes you want to squirm, and you can’t help but just slightly shuffle in place. 
“Are you sure you’re okay?” He asks, voice as concerned as his look. That should be the breaking point for you, but you remain as big as you can be, and nod affirmatively. 
“Yeah, I’m fine,” You try to assure him, hoping you don’t sound as nervous as you feel, “I think I’m just a little tired.” 
Ghost doesn’t look convinced. 
He puts a hand on your shoulder, the act like a hammer putting another dent in the wall you had put up. The leather of his glove is warm even through the thick material of your shirt, and it feels like hot metal against your cold skin, the clothing covering your shoulder be damned. 
“You can tell me if you’re not okay,” He tells you—what is he doing? Does he know something I don’t?—while his thumb starts rubbing circles into your shoulder, “I feel like you’re more than a little tired.” 
You stay silent for a little bit. You don’t know how to explain yourself, the words seeming to liquify and leak right out of you, making you speechless. He seems to notice this, sighing and letting his hand slip down to your hand, holding it and giving it a quick squeeze. 
“I think,” He looks around for a moment before turning back to you, “that we should head to my office so that nobody can bother us, and then you can tell me all about how you’re feeling right now. Does that sound okay?” 
You nod wordlessly, not trusting yourself to talk with how heavy your tongue feels, and you let Ghost lead you back to his office. It’s only a hallway away, but that’s still enough time to overthink everything that could possibly happen. How does he know something’s wrong? What gave it away? Did I do something bad? What did I do? Wh—
The creak of his office door opening snaps you out of your thoughts, and Ghost steps aside to let you enter his office first. Hesitantly, you take a few steps inside, and you hear the door click shut behind you as Ghost walks in. He takes your hand again, making you look at him as he guides you to a chair. 
You sit in the chair that’s in front of his desk, and he quickly drags out the chair that’s behind it so that it’s right next to yours. He sits down. 
He’s looking at you expectantly. 
“Uh.” You’re not sure what to say. He’s looking at you so reassuringly, it’s hard to keep yourself sitting upright. 
“I know something’s wrong,” Ghost says, leaning forward the tiniest bit, “I need you to tell me what’s wrong so I can help you.” 
He’s got to have at least some idea of what you’re experiencing, You think, trying to form some sort of explanation, He’s being so… weird? 
You swear there’s some other word you could use, but your vocabulary feels so limited, and you would mentally curse if you could because you know that now your explanation is gonna sound weird. You can’t use the words you want, you’re gonna be forced to use simple words, ones that can’t convey exactly how you feel. Words that—and it physically pained you to admit this—were childish. 
You can explain your situation. Just, now it would be more… blunt. And short. And also you’d feel like killing yourself afterwards. You won’t, obviously, but you can predict that you’ll come very close to doing so.
Okay, I have to say something because Ghost is looking more and more worried the longer I stay silent. 
“I feel…” You trail off for a moment, trying to get your thoughts in order for the next two seconds to actually say something that makes sense, before continuing in a far less confident tone, “… small.” 
The moment the words leave your mouth, you regret it. Ew. Ew. Ew. What. Why? Why that word? It leaves a sour taste on your tongue and yet you can’t think of any other word that would better suit how you feel. Still. Ew. 
Your thoughts are a jumbled mess ranging from fleeting thoughts of disgust to thoughts lodged in the back of your mind begging you to go anywhere else just so that you can stop having to have this conversation. This conversation requires words bigger than you have access to, and a sort of control over yourself that you can’t grasp. You can feel your hands twitching, wanting something to hold onto, anything to keep you distracted from the overwhelming urge to just regress. 
Ghost blinks. He didn’t expect that answer. 
“Small?” He repeats in a questioning tone, eyebrows furrowed, “I mean, compared to me, I guess you’re kind of short—” 
“No, no, not like short small,” You try to clarify, feeling just slightly discouraged by Ghost’s confused words, “Like…” 
You struggle to find the words that properly describe how you feel, only finding words like small and little in your current vocabulary. Your findings are making you increasingly upset, and you can feel your face start to grow hot with frustration and embarrassment. 
Oh my God. 
“Like…?” Ghost nudges your knee with his, trying to encourage you to talk, “I’m not leaving until you tell me.” 
There’s still a level of care in his words, no matter how confused he seems, and that adds all the more struggle to your predicament. Not only do you not want to tell him, but you can’t describe how you feel in a way that’s acceptable for someone your age to describe anything. At least, not in a way that you deem acceptable for yourself to describe anything. 
You’re far too old to be describing yourself as small. 
“[c/n]?” Ghost nudges you again, and you blink at him. Your eyes are flickering all over his mask, going anywhere but his eyes, since eye contact with anyone would make everything significantly worse for you right now. 
“It’s just—” You try to take a deep breath but your breath hitches. Everything is starting to make you feel so frustrated, and you’re starting to think that you might just throw a tantrum if you can’t do at least one thing right. You try to find the words you want to use but your throat is disobediently closing on you. Your mind feels like straight mush, and the quickly softening look that Ghost is giving you isn’t helping you at all. 
To your horror, in your inexplicable inability to talk in the way you normally do, you let out a small whine. It sounds obnoxious to your ears, and worst of all, sounds like something a little kid would do. 
You put your head in your hands, the quickly reddening skin of your cheeks getting cooled by the cold of your palms as you try and hide your face from Ghost. You can picture how he looks right now—somehow more confused than earlier, possibly annoyed, weirded out—and all those mental images make you bite your tongue to prevent another noise. 
“What was that?” You don’t answer him. 
To your non-answer, Ghost sighs, and you think, This is it, this is where he kicks me out of his office, oh my God I’m gonna get dishonorably discharged and he’s gonna give me a really mean look on my way out—
“Look at me.” You shake your head negatively. 
“Why not?” He sounds so confused, it makes you want to cry. There’s still a level of worry in his voice, and it adds to the fog that builds up in your brain. 
You move your face just slightly up so that your eyes peek out from above your fingertips, your hands covering the rest of your face. Ghost reaches out both of his hands, and ever so gently removes your hands from your face, uncovering your red cheeks and your lips—the lower of which quivers, like you’re about to cry. He notices this quickly, and you can practically feel the level of his worry shoot up. 
He doesn’t say anything, instead just holding your hands in his for a moment, before he sets them down into your lap. He looks at you, concerned, and asks, “Is it hard to talk right now?” 
You nod. His gaze shifts to his computer, and then back to you. 
“I’m gonna go look a few things up really quick, okay? I’ll just be right over there,” He nods over to the space behind his computer, “and I’ll be right back here in a few seconds.” 
You reluctantly nod again, and Ghost gets up from his seat. He grabs the back of the chair and drags it back around behind his desk, sitting down in it and powering on his monitor. It turns on almost immediately, much to his relief, and he goes to his browser and searches up a few things. You can’t tell what he’s searching up, only hearing the clacking of keys and the occasional final click that indicates that he’s hit the enter button. 
He stays there for maybe a minute or two. It’s a long few minutes, and you can feel yourself slipping more and more the longer he stays at his computer. And the more you feel yourself slipping into that younger mindset, the more you start to crave Ghost’s attention. 
The way his eyes are glued to his computer starts to irritate you. You’re aware that he’s doing something important, he must be, because why would he be so intent on looking something up otherwise, but still—you manage to feel the tiniest bit jealous of the computer. You know you’re too far gone when you can’t find it within yourself to realize that you’re jealous of a computer. 
Your eyes linger on him and he must notice this because he looks up from the screen of his monitor and looks over at you. As if he can read your mind, he reassures you, “Just a few more seconds.” 
But you said you were gonna be back in a few seconds a few minutes ago. 
You don’t voice your thoughts. Instead, you nod, because God forbid you annoy Ghost with your need for attention now when he’s being so patient with you. He looks at you for another moment before going back to his computer and looking something else up, this time with a little more fervor. 
Another few seconds pass and, true to his word this time, Ghost stops and gets up from his chair. He walks over to you, and your eyes follow him intently. He kneels down in front of you.
He looks hesitant to say something to you. That’s a first. That adds to the exponentially growing blob of fear that lives inside your mind, one of the only things that’s still prominent in the fog that conquers your brain. 
“Are you…” You feel like you know what he’s gonna ask you. You’re bracing yourself for the question, and he looks like he’s bracing himself just to ask it. 
“How, uh,” He’s trying to find the right wording, and you’ve never been able to relate to him harder than you do in this moment, “How… do you feel right now? How old?” 
How old? You don’t really like that question. As much as you like that you’re now getting attention, you’re starting to remember how little you actually enjoy this type of attention. The question is pretty vague, but at the same time so specific, and you’re almost ashamed to know exactly what the answer is. Or, at least, you would feel ashamed if there was room in your mind to feel so. 
“You said you feel small, right? Not like short small, just small?” He sounds more unsure of himself now, and you don’t think you like seeing him so reluctant to say something, “I looked up what it means to feel like that. Took some time, but I got to some person’s… website, and the person who wrote it was talkin’ about feeling like that. Something about regression, feeling a little bit younger than usual?” 
He’s being so awkward about it, and while you typically find his awkwardness funny, now it’s anything but that. 
“Uhm,” Your voice comes out as a mumble and you see Ghost perk up at it. You don’t know what to say. For a moment, you’re silent again, before you get over your embarrassment for a quick two seconds and force yourself to say, “Four.” 
“Four?” Ghost asks, before quickly realizing, “Right. Four. You feel four?” 
You nod, and your hands instinctively start moving back up to cover your face. Ghost swiftly grabs them, keeping his grip gentle as he keeps them from reaching your face. 
“Hey, don’t try to hide again,” He says, tone softening as he holds your hands, “everything’s fine, okay? Do you— what, uh— do you need me to do anything? Do you want me to leave you alo—”
“No!” You quickly answer, a little surprised by your own volume, before you clear your throat and answer in a much more quiet voice, “Don’t leave me alone.” 
“Okay, okay,” Ghost’s thumbs rub across the back of your hands, a soothing gesture that makes you the tiniest bit more relaxed, “what do you need?” 
You sniffle, and you can see an immediate look of panic cross Ghost’s eyes. You don’t know how well he is with crying children, and don’t want to impose such a situation on him, but you also can’t stop the tears that begin to well up in the corners of your eyes. 
“Hey, don’t cry,” He borderline begs, “everything’s gonna be okay, okay? Please do not cry. Take a deep breath.” 
You try to take a deep breath, you really do, but your breath just hitches and gets caught in your throat. It only makes you more distressed, adding to the urge you have to just disappear. Ghost notices your failed deep breathing and lets go of one of your hands, before taking the other and holding it to his chest.
You can just barely feel his heartbeat, his thick tactical vest and gear in the way of it, but you can still feel it. Ghost takes a deep breath, holding it for a second or two before slowly exhaling. 
“You copy me, okay?” He tells you, his words an order but his tone suggesting otherwise. He takes another deep breath, this time hoping you’ll follow his lead, and you do. 
You try to breathe with him, your hand on his chest helping, but your breath keeps getting caught in your throat. Ghost notices this, but continues his breathing anyway, hoping you’ll catch on soon. You do, thankfully—after a few more attempted breaths, you finally manage one almost identical to Ghost’s. The next few after that go similarly, and that’s when Ghost decides you’re alright to take your hand off of his chest. 
“I need you to tell me what to do,” He says, keeping your hand in his hold, “or at least tell me how all of this works. I want to help you.”
 You really don’t want to tell him what you need right now, but you also don’t think you have a choice. 
Wordlessly, you stand up from your seat, balance just slightly off-center before you quickly get your footing right. Ghost watches you, not moving, before you tug on his hand to try and urge him to get up as well. He obliges, getting up. 
“What—” You interrupt him by taking another step forward and letting your head thump right into his chest, ignoring the itchy uncomfortable feeling of his vest against your face. You don’t bother to wrap your arms around him to at least try and form some sort of hug, preferring to just smush yourself into him and hope for the best. 
After a moment of stunned silence, he wraps his arms around you. 
“You mind if we move behind my desk so I can look up some more stuff on all of this?” He asks, voice quiet, “Unless you want to just tell me?” 
“Desk,” You simply mumble into his vest, making him nod. 
“Alright, but you’re gonna have to stop hugging me for a second,” Ghost warns you. You reluctantly step away, and Ghost smiles softly down at you, bringing his hands away from your back and instead holding one of yours. 
He leads you behind his desk, and lets go of your hand before sitting down in his chair. Pausing, he quickly realizes you have nowhere to sit, and thinks for a moment before getting back up. He drags his chair just slightly to the side and looks back at you. 
“Sit down,” He nods to the chair, “It’s only gonna be a minute or two, alright?” 
You nod, hesitantly moving to sit in the chair, not really liking how far away from Ghost it is. It's not that far, You try to rationalize, I’m gonna be fine. 
Ghost can see your hesitation and tries to work as quickly as he can, grateful that he didn’t turn his computer off earlier, typing away on his keyboard. You don’t care to see what he’s looking up, more focused on looking at the time on his monitor. 21:44. 21:45. The time ticks by and even though it’s only been a few seconds you already want Ghost’s attention again. His attention has actually turned into good attention, and that’s the type of attention you’ve been craving for the past week. 
The clock reads 21:47 once Ghost is done, and he powers his monitor off this time, the small whirring the device makes dying down to a low hum before going completely silent. He turns to you, and somehow can sense that you need more attention. 
“Am I not paying enough attention to you?” He teases you, making you conflicted on whether you should be annoyed by the teasing or happy you’re finally getting attention. As if he can read your mind, he chuckles, and kneels down to your level. 
“I’m gonna give you as much attention as you need, alright?” He promises, “I just need you to stay in this room.” 
— 
Ghost watches you nod non-verbally, and it only adds to his softening expression. 
He’s always had a soft spot for kids. He knows that you aren’t technically a kid, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t still see you as one. You’re young for someone in the military, much less someone in this 141, and now that he’s found out that you’re an age regressor, that you’re a little—well, that doesn’t help how he sees you at all. 
He thinks that maybe the reason he has such a soft spot for kids is a few encounters he’s had with them in the past. He’s seen far too many in compromising positions while on missions; positions like being held hostage, being held as prisoner, or just generally being mistreated or even just living in bad conditions. 
He looks at you, and he just sees another one of those kids. 
He sees how you act around him. He’s not stupid. When he talks to you, you’re actually engaged in the conversation, compared to when anyone else tries to talk to you—maybe excluding Price, or Soap, or Gaz, heavy on that maybe—you’re more likely than not brushing them off every chance you get. You’re standoffish with everyone else, but with him, you’ll always accept any conversation he initiates. 
He can also see the way you look at him. It’s like you’re looking at your idol, or your savior, the way you look up at him. He can see that curious glint in your eyes when he tells you about a recent mission, or when he tells you anything, really. He can see when you try to mimic how he holds his weapons, and when you try to copy his techniques. 
He remembers catching you one day in the shooting range trying to mimic how he aims at the targets—looking through your scope with one eye closed, the other focused only on the dot centered on the scope, taking a deep breath in and out before shooting, and keeping the gun exactly like that even seconds after the shot’s been fired. 
In fact, the copying has gone from guns to melee weapons recently. Ghost swings only his forearm when he uses a knife, thumb resting on the very end of the knife’s handle, and entire arm stiff as he does. He does a slow windup when behind someone, a fast one on the off-chance that he’s in front, and buries the weapon to the hilt in whoever’s flesh he’s penetrated. He’s already seen you do the same on a recent mission. Not only that, but he caught you using a knife almost identical to his. 
And now, you’re still looking at him like that—except, different. Sort of like how a kid might look up to their parents. 
“What do you feel like doing, kiddo?” He asks, hoping the pet name isn’t too much. 
From the way your eyes light up, he suspects it isn't. 
“Mmm…” You hum, thinking for a moment, before requesting, “Coloring?” 
“Coloring, huh?” Ghost looks around for some blank paper and some sort of marker or pen thick enough to act as one, but can only find some highlighters. He turns to you, frowning, “Sorry, but I don’t think I have any paper, kid. Anything else you wanna do?”
You shake your head, and Ghost is just about ready to jump off of a bridge before you point to his arm and repeat, “Coloring.” 
He looks at his arm for a second, confused, before he remembers a conversation the two of you had a month or so ago. 
“If you ever wanna get tattoos, I know a guy in Brighton,” Ghost said, reclining his chair back so that he can lay down in it. You were sitting across from him in front of his desk, fiddling with one of his pens. 
“Good to know,” You hummed, “You have any tattoos?” 
“Yeah,” You perked up at his admission, and he sat up for a second to roll up the sleeve of his shirt. He wasn’t wearing his usual gear, only one of those standard issue army-green shirts. 
“Here,” He pointed to a large tattoo covering his whole arm like a sleeve, a few designs you could point out to yourself being a skull, a few Roman numerals, and some kind of scythe. 
“Very emo,” You commented, making Ghost snort, “I like it.” 
“I’m glad,” He rolled his sleeve back down. 
There’s a lot of blank space in the tattoo, despite it being a sleeve, and he can already tell that you mean you want to color in that space. He thinks about it for a moment, a fleeting thought of is that even safe? crossing his mind before he ultimately decides that he doesn’t care and would rather kill himself than see you disappointed because he denied your request, his own health be damned. 
“Alright,” He hums, grabbing a few highlighters from a mesh cup on his desk in the colors pink, yellow, and blue, “Go for it.” 
You give him a small smile and if he cared about if he’d get ink poisoning two seconds ago, he sure as hell doesn’t care now. You gingerly grab the highlighters from his hand, your grabbing not too secure and sort of clumsy but secure enough that the markers stay in your hand.
You hold them with both hands, and it makes Ghost realize how small your hands are—sure, you could hold the highlighters with one hand, but he’s glad you aren’t because now he can admire just how small you are as a whole. 
You set the yellow and blue down on his desk, making sure they don’t roll off for a moment before uncapping the pink and hesitantly holding out a hand for Ghost’s arm. He rolls up his sleeve and obediently holds out his arm for you, watching curiously as you press the cold tip of the highlighter to his skin. You’re starting by coloring in the skull a neon pink, much to his amusement, and you’re starting in the dead center of its forehead. 
You’re so much more quiet than you usually are when you’re little, and you’re so much more hesitant, it makes Ghost want to just wrap you in a blanket and keep you safe and in his sight forever. 
Your tongue slightly pokes out from between your lips as you concentrate on coloring in Ghost’s tattoo, making him grin beneath his mask. The ink of the highlighter doesn’t stay within the black bounds of his tattoos at all, but he doesn’t care one bit, and he doesn’t think you care either. You finish up the skull quickly, and move onto the scythe that’s right next to it, this time capping the pink highlighter and grabbing the yellow. 
Ghost is pretty sure this is gonna stain his skin for a day or two, but he couldn’t care less.
He can’t help but notice how much more relaxed you look in your regressed state. More at peace, he should say. There’s no longer a hunch in your shoulders, your eyes aren’t twitching from your headache, and you’re not bouncing your leg like you usually do when you’re sitting down somewhere. It’s like any anxieties you had pre-regression had evaporated, like slipping into a younger mentality had taken away most of your worries, if not all of them. 
He also can’t help but wish he could see you like this more often. Not necessarily the regressed part, but the relaxed part. Well, maybe the regressed part too. You’re being such a sweetheart right now, he doesn’t think he’ll be able to live through this experience. 
“You having fun there, darling?” Ghost asks, his grin evident in his voice. The corners of your lips quirk up at the pet name and you nod silently, and now Ghost is starting to think you’re actually trying to kill him. You’re being so uncharacteristically shy, and you’re being so quiet, and you’re just being so sweet. 
It seems you’ve moved onto the blue highlighter now, coloring in the last bit of his tattoo. He doesn’t think he’ll ever wash it off—or, at least, he wouldn’t if he had a choice. He knows that he has to shower sometime soon, but surely he can put that off for a bit, right?
Once you’re finished with your coloring, you cap the highlighter, and set it down next to the others you’ve discarded. You turn Ghost’s arm the tiniest bit towards him so that he can see your work better. 
“‘s it good?” You ask quietly, watching intently for Ghost’s reaction. He looks over your coloring job and hums approvingly. 
“It’s amazing, I love it,” He assures you, smiling down softly at you, “You did great.” 
You seem to preen at the praise, and you take your hand off of Ghost’s arm, moving to put in your lap. You’re keeping yourself very contained, Ghost notices, Why? 
He’s snapped out of his thoughts when he hears you yawn, and you quickly move to cover your mouth as you do. He’s reminded that it’s almost twenty-two hundred, and while that usually wouldn’t be an issue for him, it’s an issue for you. You originally came to the 141 as someone who had a sleep schedule almost as fucked up at Ghost’s, but soon developed a habit of going to sleep somewhat early considering the training you had in the morning. So, now you get tired anywhere from eighteen-hundred to twenty-one hundred. After that, your only goal is to find somewhere to sleep. 
“Sleepy?” You nod tiredly, making Ghost coo, Ghost, the man who quite literally haunts some people’s nightmares, coos at you, “Aw, of course you are, sweetheart. Pretty sure it’s way past your bedtime by now.” 
“Nuh uh,” You deny, making Ghost chuckle. 
“‘Nuh uh’?” He asks, amused, “What d’you mean ‘nuh uh’?” 
“No b’dtime,” You shortly elaborate. 
“Ohhh, okay,” Ghost feigns realization, “You think you’re too big for a bedtime, huh?” 
“Mhm. Way too big.”
“I dunno about ‘way’ too big,” Ghost hums, checking to see if the highlighter on his arm has dried before he pulls his sleeve back down. “You seem pretty little to me.” 
“No,” You whine, dragging out the ‘o’, “Not lil’.” 
“Hmm… you sure, kiddo?” Ghost asks, “So if I ask you if you need to go to bed, you’re gonna say ‘no’?” 
That makes you hesitate, and Ghost almost thinks he’s won, before your own pettiness wins and you nod affirmatively. He raises an eyebrow at you. 
“Alright, well, you’ve gotta sleep at some point,” He says, crossing his arms as he leans back in his chair. 
You think this over for a second, and he watches as you look over him for a moment before looking down at his lap, then looking back up at him. He can already tell there’s some sort of plan forming in your mind.  Wordlessly, you get up, and Ghost does nothing to stop you as you decide to just plop yourself down into his lap. You straddle his thighs, moving until you’re sitting comfortably on him, and then let yourself slump forward so that your face is resting in the crook of his neck. It takes him a moment to process what just happened, before he laughs lightly and wraps both of his arms around you to keep you in place. 
“Oh, okay,” He grins, resting his chin on your shoulder, “you just wanna cuddle with me until you fall asleep? Is that what this is?” 
He feels you nod against his neck, and his grin grows as he rubs one hand against your back, trying to soothe you to sleep. He doesn’t say anything else, not wanting to distract you from your attempts to sleep anymore, simply letting you stay slumped against him. Your breathing wasn’t too fast-paced to begin with, but as you relax even more in his arms, he can feel your breathing even out. 
You’re falling asleep fairly quickly, and the only complaint he has is that he didn’t get to spend nearly as much time as he wanted to with you while you were awake and regressed. 
Once he’s sure you’re barely awake, he murmurs, “You’re such a sweetheart, you know that?” 
— 
You don’t know how long it’s been since you fell asleep, but you’re woken up by the slight rustling of clothes, and then you feel yourself moving up. 
Your mind still feels foggy and you can tell you’re still somewhat in that younger mindset of yours, but now you’re significantly less bothered by it than you were before. You’re awake enough to be aware of what’s happening, always having been a light-sleeper, but not awake enough to know exactly what’s happening. You don’t dare open your eyes, and try to keep your breathing even—though that isn’t much of a challenge. 
That headache that had been building up earlier has fully disappeared, thank God, and you no longer feel the tension in your shoulder that you’d been unconsciously carrying. 
You can sort of feel someone’s arms snaked under your back, and you know that you’re being moved somewhere. Quickly, you remember that it’s Ghost carrying you, and that you had fallen asleep on him, much to your embarrassment. Or, at least, it would be much to your embarrassment if you had the mental capacity to feel embarrassed about that right now. But you feel so comfy and so safe that it really doesn’t matter to you right now. 
You can hear the clicking of Ghost’s boots against the concrete floors of the hallway, and he’s carrying you off somewhere; you imagine that somewhere to be your sleeping quarters. He’s walking pretty fast, not hurriedly but still at a somewhat fast pace. 
Soon, he reaches a stopping point where he has to awkwardly put one leg up to support your back on his thigh as he quickly reaches one arm out to turn the knob of the door to your sleeping quarters and pulls that arm right back to support your back again. He sighs as he puts his foot back down, kicking open the door and walking in. 
He’s quick to reach your bed, and he pauses as he considers what to do. You can practically hear him thinking, wondering how he’s gonna get you under the covers while he’s still carrying you, and for a second you think about showing him you’re awake so that things are easier for him before he sets you down on the bed. 
He pulls the covers up and stops when he reaches the part your body covers, and picks you back up, before dropping you right back off where the blankets have been pulled away. He pulls the covers back over you. 
After a few moments, you think he’s left the room, before you hear the rustling of fabric and feel him leaning down. He gently presses his lips to your forehead and pulls away after a second or two, before quietly mumbling, “Night, kiddo.”
He stays there for a moment before you hear his footsteps leave the room, and then the door clicking shut behind him as he leaves the room entirely. 
You’re quick to fall asleep after that.
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Katsuki Bakugou x F!reader - smut oneshot about makin' babies
MDNI!
The last domestic post I made kinda got really popular, and I love that trope so much I thought I'd make another one! smut this time, though.
warnings: reader is afab and presents as female/feminine, Penetrative sex, breeding, reader is (or was) on birth control, a sprinkle of degradation, and lots and lots of cursing
smut starts at the *
______________________________________________________________
bang
the door to your shared home in the suburbs swung open, scary for most but completely normal, if not comforting for you. "Wifey! I'm home," Katsuki called out gruffly, removing his gauntlets, tossing his mask off, practically ripping off his shoes, and crashing onto the very expensive couch with his dirty, sooty hero suit. By the time you walked in, his arms were tucked behind his head, his eyes were closed, and his mouth was pushed into a scowl as he awaited his pampering.
He opened one eye, glancing at you before shutting it again. "Took you long enough," he grumbled, his way of saying he missed you dearly. "um, excuse me, but what are you doing on the couch in that," you asked, annoyance lacing your tone as you put your hands on your hips. You were wearing his old T-shirt from high school, black with a white skull in the center, along with underwear as bottoms.
"I'm tired, I've been savin' lives all day, Just lemme relax" he scoffed, not moving an inch. "You know you're the one cleaning that, right?" He rolled his eyes, sighing and sitting up. "I'd be cleanin' it anyway, you never do it right." He always did this, to the point that you suspect he liked cleaning.
"Where's my damn kiss already," he asked, more of an order, and looking up at you expectantly as he scowled. You smirked, taking the opportunity to gain a little extra power. "You can have it once you get off the couch and shower," you shrugged, walking off into the bedroom. You could hear him groan, but really it was a whine in disguise. A whine for big strong tough manly men, if you will.
after a moment of silence, you could hear his heavy stomping into the bedroom, a devilish grin on his face as he examined your place on your shared bed. "I'll only take a shower if you do it with me," he said pridefully, as if he cracked the horny husband code.
You laughed at his arrogant demeanor, looking up from your phone a moment and wanting to mess with him a little. "fine, but just so you know, I forgot to take my birth control last night." This was actually true, but mentioning it now made it so much funnier.
He paused, before cocking a brow and sauntering over to stand above you. "So what," He said boldly, that grin persisting. You raised your brows, an amused smile on your face as your attention was kept mainly on your phone. "So...I'm off my birth control? We can't do anything penetrative, unless you want a mini-Katsuki running around."
He rolled his eyes, leaning down to you with his hands on his hips. "What's so wrong about that, hah? I'm great." Now your attention was all the way on him, trying to gauge if he was joking or not. "Katsuki, you really need to think about the words that come out of your mouth." Now we were in serious territory, "Katsuki" was reserved for seriousness.
He huffed, clearly running out of patience. "You thick or somethin'?" You rolled your eyes, maybe you were if you couldn't grasp what exactly he was trying to get at. "If we did that, I'd probably get pregnant," you sighed, talking as if you were explaining things to a toddler. "No shit, idiot. I've been wanting you pregnant since we got married, anyways."
Ok, now you had to put your phone down completely. You just stared at him for a moment, like a deer in the headlights, processing. "W- uh...why haven't you told me?" Having kids was something you both agreed on doing, but the when and where was never discussed.
"Didn't think it was that important until now..." he grumbled, looking askance as his cheeks pinked. He didn't think you'd say yes until now. You studied him for a moment, weighing your options, before smiling and giggling a little. "you know what? why the hell not." He seemed to light up, his smile returning as he yanked you up and out of bed.
*
"Well come on dumbass, we have a baby to make," he chuckled, practically on cloud 9. It made you smile, seeing your grumpy husband so happy, albeit his smile looks down right dastardly. He pulled you to the bathroom, switching on the water and taking his clothes off as fast as possible. You did the same, rather excited yourself given the circumstances, and before you knew it you had your back pressed to the shower wall.
He was holding you up by your hips, and currently shifting your legs to be on his broad, scarred shoulders. His member was just an inch or two before you, the tip oozing semen as he situated the two of you. His lips were right next to your ear, and he seemed to be bending you with the intent of snapping you in half.
"You better be fuckin' ready, 'cause I'm not stopping if you cry," He purred, his voice deep and husky. he was technically being honest, because no, he wouldn't stop if you cried, but if you showed even the tiniest bit of true fear he'd stop even if he was a millisecond away from climax.
You wrapped your arms around his neck, steadying yourself before glancing down at his rock hard cock. You've been married for what, 3 years? Yet you still can't help but tremble at the sight, at the idea that he would be inside you, this time with the intent of impregnating you.
"Good," you giggled back seductively, making him chuckle. "Better pray you keep that confidence," he taunted, before pressing you as hard against the wall as possible. He snaked a muscled arm around your waist, the other reaching down to guide himself to your dripping cunt. You squirmed a little, the anticipation getting to you, and he pinched your side harshly. "Hold the fuck still," he growled, giving you a sharp stare.
He waited a second or two after you settled, making sure you stayed that way, before continuing. The head of his weeping cock entered the beginnings of your vagina, you flesh gripping his in a way that elicited a grunt from him. He kept pushing through, inch by inch, until he got tired of waiting and shoved the last couple inches in with one hard thrust. You moaned out, the freshly manicured nails he paid for pressing into the skin of his shoulders.
He waited a moment, allowing you to get comfortable while trying to mask his panting from how good you felt, before slowly pulling back out and shoving it back in. The sounds you made, from your mouth and anywhere else, drove him to the brink of his patience. He began pistoning in and out of you, huffing and puffing and groaning as he gazed upon your current state. Moaning at every thrust, Hair messy from being wet and dragging across the shower wall, eyes having a distant and glossy look as he wrecked you. He buried his face in your neck, giving sloppy kisses to you skin, partly to muffle how absolutely drunk off your cunt he sounded.
He pulled away from your neck but never halted the wreckless movement of his hips, smirking down at you menacingly as he panted and groaned. "Hah...You gonna fuckin' cum, baby? Gonna cum on my...hngh...cock like a good little slut?" Dirty talk was his specialty, something he took pride in. He loved how it made you clench around him, just as you were doing now.
"Mmh....holy shit," He muttered, Mouth pressed to your ear. "Gonna fill you with my kids, so you better not let any drip out." He said it as if it were a threat, and he began to speed up even more as he gripped your sides, his tip giving sloppy kisses to your cervix with each ministration. The shower wall made a hollow pounding sound, accompanied by the squelching of your rough sex, his groans and mindless rambling, and your squeals and moaning.
"Katsuki! You better not fucking stop," you moaned, brows knit together in concentration. He was hitting every spot just right, and your hips rolled against his. Just thinking about his cum, about him filling you with life, it put you on the edge. Suddenly, the tight knot in your core snapped, and you found yourself having one of the best orgasms of your life on your husband's cock. The sounds you made, your blissed out face, everything made him feel stupidly hot.
"Fuck...Fuck, fuck fuck!" His face buried back into your neck, biting the skin to muffle his loud, guttural moaning. He gripped your hips so hard his nails made indents in your skin, his own hips stuttering to a stop as he held you down on him. You could feel him burst within you, ribbons of hot white cum coating your insides. Slowly he came down from his high, panting and whimpering just a little. He felt how limp your body was in his arms, and immediately felt the need to take care of you.
Without disturbing your current position, he leaned over and shut the water off. Gently and slowly, he began to pull out, his cock now limp after doing it's job. He shifted you to be carried bridal style, not bothering with a towel as he took you out of the bathroom and to the bedroom. "Kat..." You mumbled, laughter in your throat at how careful he was being. This was hardly the roughest sex you've had with him, yet he was treating you like glass.
"What," he grumbled, laying you on the bed. For a moment, just one little moment, he watched as his cum oozed out of you. It was hot, way too hot. "It's not like I'm made of porcelain," You giggled, sitting up on your elbows. He quickly rolled his eyes and shoved two fingers into you, causing you to squeal. "Kat," you cried, a moan falling from your lips. "What? gotta keep as much of it in there as possible." He pulled his fingers back out with all the care he could muster, before quickly grabbing some clean panties and sliding them on you. You might have believed that was the only reason, but the way he curled his fingers up just right said otherwise.
"The bed's gonna be wet, we have to dry off," you sighed, moving to get up. He quickly scooped you up and set you down so your head was on the pillow, getting in with you and snuggling up behind you. "Who gives a shit," he grumbled, nuzzling into your neck as he pulled the comforter up to his shoulders. "I'm gonna be a dad," he whispered, pulling you into him and resting both hands on your lower abdomen.
______________________________________________________________
Hey, You know how I said I loved the domestic crap? yep, still do. Hope you enjoyed this as much as I did, and as always, don't be afraid to comment! fr if you comment we're literally married now, ily.
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madschiavelique · 1 year
Text
concept : anxious!reader x miguel o’hara
this contains nsfw content at the end in the "nsfw bonus" part, content warnings : fingering
okay so i had this idea a few days ago and i felt like i just had to share it because it's really sweet and fluffy (and also because this idea comes from someone who is very anxious and needs comfort)
you're a nervous reader that always plays with something from their body when they are feeling anxious, like your fingers or the skin around your nails, or pulling on scratching/trying to find imperfections on your skin to remove them, maybe even pulling on your eyebrow hairs
and imagine that Miguel notices that, and asks you "are you nervous ?"
you might answer yes, or that it's just something you do automatically without paying too much attention because it just feels a bit more calming/grounding, or you might even answer no because you don't want him to worry about your anxiety (since he already has so much to worry about)
but what happens is that whatever your answer is, he just takes your hand in his, and allows you to play with it
at first you might be reluctant because you don't want to bother him, the man's busier than a president and you don't want to occupy him with silly things like that
but he assures you he doesn't care, he would actually much prefer you to do this than continue picking at your own skin
so after him convincing you that it's totally okay for you to take his hand and do whatever you want with it when you're nervous, you accept
at the very beginning, you hadn't caught the reflex of taking his hand whenever you were anxious. when he noticed the few times where you were around him and still picking at your fingers, he just lended you his hand for you to take, and you'd take it
so you'd trace the lines of his palm, let your fingertips draw on his skin, sometimes just grabbing one of his fingers in full hand just like a baby would because damn this man's hands are so big
and he would allow you this in every occasion
suddenly feeling nervous while eating in the cafeteria ? he'd lend you his hand
feeling anxious before/after a mission ? he'll let you take his hand and will even caress yours with his thumb to soothe you
nervous during a meeting ? he'd give you his hand and would also allow you to draw on them if that can help you feel less nervous, although he'd still remind you to be serious during the meeting and to lend an ear to what was being said
it took about two good weeks to get you used to taking his hand in yours whenever you were feeling anxious, or just when you had the simple and sudden urge to pick at your own skin
he doesn't care that people look at you both with wide eyes when you start playing with his hand, they think it's just unusual for Miguel to allow this, because... well he is Miguel
and now, any time you felt the urge to give in your old habit, you'd come to him, no matter the time of day or the situation, and he'd gladly allow you to take his hand in yours
bonus nsfw :
if you feel way too anxious (without of course reaching the level of a panic attack) you might masturbate, just to help you calm down a bit
and when Miguel had asked you one day "but what do you do on days where you're feeling way too anxious fiddling with your fingers ?"
you had hesitated telling him, but as he can be very persuasive, he told you : "if you are getting way too anxious whether in the society or on a mission, I have to know how to deal with this."
so you told him, avoiding eye contact while doing so. you thought that he might consider this a bit too much, or unprofessional, but he just took your chin between his fingers to find your gaze, and said "if you ever are getting way too anxious and need this relief, you need to ask me from now on, okay ?"
you had agreed.
you had a code for that, very simple : you pressed his hand 3 times, and you both would immediately leave the place to find somewhere out of sight to get you to "calm down"
he'd be so sweet with you, praising you as he fingers you, his other hand caressing your back is soft motions
"you're doing so great, cariño," he'd murmur, "it's okay, i'm here, everything's okay"
you might or might not have sometimes squeezed his hand 3 times when you were not anxious at all... and he knew that very well
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darlingdekarios · 2 years
Text
batter up.
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rating: explicit. 18+ only. length: 6,003 content: Negan Smith x f!reader, Savior!Negan, colorful language, canon-accurate violence, nsfw, smut [v fingering, f receiving oral, unprotected p in v, creampie, cockwarming], various kinks [praise, biting, spit, breeding]
it should have been obvious that batting lessons with Negan would end up like this.
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You’d known exactly what your salacious tone indicated the moment the words had left your lips. 
“You ever gonna show me how you swing that bat of yours around, Negan?”
The drawl of his name from your mouth – your fuckin’ mouth like a sailor – ticked his lips upward into an amused smile, eyes regarding you up and down slowly. He leaned back in the chair he sat in, motioning with a finger for you to come closer before returning his attention to the object in question, a wet cloth removing remnants of blood and brains from the wood.
The chill down your spine should have been from fear. That was far from the case.
You were new. Shiny. You’d been alone for an impressive amount of time, and it had ruined your people skills. You were mostly quiet, kept to yourself, carried your weight for the group, and hardly anyone ever needed to talk to you. But when they did – hell hath no fury. You had a sharp tongue and little filter when that pretty mouth of yours did open. 
You found yourself in the presence of his laughter often when you spoke. You always got your way. You were quickly his favorite toy.
He wondered – often – about the life you had before everything went to hell in a handbasket. He wondered what job you had, what your damn hobbies were, if you had a husband, maybe some kids runnin’ around. It wasn’t his business. He never asked. 
“You ever gonna ask nicely?”
You sat atop the table in front of him, crossing your legs slowly, dramatically, temptingly, relishing in the way his eyes dragged across your legs in the short shorts you’d been wearing in the July heat for a moment as you twisted your upper body toward him, leaning your weight on one arm. 
His hand that rested on the surface twitched toward yours. 
“I’d love it if you’d be sweet enough to show me how good you are with that bat,” you spoke lowly, eyes burning into his. His pupils blew wider as you spoke each word. You wished you could be close enough to see that each time you spoke. “Pretty please.”
It was a wonder to this new world that he hadn’t fucked you yet. 
“Gonna take patrol later,” he began, eyes finding yours once again. With wide eyes and semi-pouted lips you were practically begging him. It was dangerous how he’d give you whatever you wanted. “You can come with me if you promise not to get yourself killed.”
You smiled, fingers sliding closer to his, lightly gliding over the back of his hand feather light. You noticed the hitch in his breath, the temptation to point it out almost too strong to ignore. You opted to give the man before you a pass. 
“Guess somebody better keep me safe then, huh?”
“Like you’re not capable of taking care of yourself.”
He knew he’d fallen into some kinda trap when his response brought your signature, mischievous grin. He was perfectly content – at least for the moment – not to even try to climb out. 
“Oh, I’m capable,” you responded carefully, flipping his hand over to run your fingers over his palm. His hands were large – much larger than yours – and rough. Battle scarred. It wasn’t the first time you’d fantasized about how they felt. “But sometimes it’s just so much nicer for someone else to take care of you.”
It didn’t take him deciphering a fucking code or something to know exactly what the double meaning behind your words was. His self-control was stretching terribly thin – the thread holding it together would snap soon. 
An opening door behind you made you jump back to your feet, removing yourself to a reasonable distance before you were joined by the company. His right hand entered the room a moment after, and you offered Negan another smile before turning to exit. He called a reminder to you before you disappeared.
“Meet me tonight and we’ll go have some fun.”
Whatever his words meant, you were certain the sentiment was true.
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“Thought you were standin’ me up.”
He always knew when you approached, even when no one else could seem to hear your footsteps – it sparked curiosity in you to ponder exactly when he’d become so familiar with you, and what else he’d memorized. You dropped down from the wall you walked across directly behind him, boots landing on the ground with a thud. 
“That’d be stupid of me,” you replied, circling him to stand in front of him. It was seldom you stood this close to him – the fact that he towered over you only making you want to be closer. “Don’t wanna make the big man angry.”
He caught the subtle shake to your voice and smirked, dimples on full display. Fuck him. 
“Smart woman,” he complimented, his voice a little too honey-thick for you to handle. You caught yourself momentarily breathless, his eyes now burning into yours. “Now, I know you took care of yourself real well while you were alone. But tonight, the first rule, you’re with me – and outside you’ve gotta listen. I don’t wanna hear that pretty mouth of yours run.”
You only smiled up at him, looking up into his eyes between your lashes as you blinked languidly, bottom lip pulling between your teeth. You nodded in agreement – he remained transfixed on your lips.
“You’re the boss,” you asserted, zipping up the tattered leather jacket you wore to shield from the night air and offer extra protection against bites. He loved when you pulled the jacket on, and often craved to see you swallowed in his instead. He only smiled at your response – he knew you’d run your mouth at some point still.
“Second rule,” he started, eyes intense. “I don’t want you more than an arm’s length away.”
“My arm length or yours?”
Infuriating. You didn’t even make it through the rules without breaking rule one – and what made it more annoying was the fact he was still amused by it.  
“We’ll say yours since they’re shorter,” he replied, reaching to grasp one of your hands and raise your arm upward, stepping closer to demonstrate the distance he desired. You took a step even closer than that – closer would be fine, too.
“Yes, sir,” you replied lowly, tilting your head slightly as you gazed up at him, melting at the feeling of his hand engulfing yours. 
He tried to ignore the rush of heat that spread across his body.
“We’re going into the woods. Don’t want you to get lost,” he tried to continue, to ignore the name you’d called him. The feeling that fluttered in his stomach insisted to be acknowledged. 
“You big softie. Let’s go,” you replied, turning to face the gate and motioning to the guard to let you through. You turned your head to glance up at him and offer that playful smile again, eyes sparkling in the moonlight. “Teach me how to be scary.”
“Oh, you’re plenty scary,” he replied as the two of you exited. “Just gonna teach ya how to do it with a bat.”
It was mostly a comfortable silence as the two of you made your way through the thick trees. He didn’t go far – maybe a 2-mile radius was all it took for him to feel the two of you had covered enough ground. 
You watched intently, biting at your bottom lip several times as he swung the bat to handle walkers coming your way. By the twelfth one he’d began to show off, pulling his jacket off to reveal the flexing muscles in the arms of his blood-stained white t-shirt as he swung Lucille over his head with a particularly hard landing blow. 
You weren’t sure he ever looked sexier than when splashes of red painted his face.
It got easier the longer you went on, the conversation flowing between the two of you – the flirtatious nature always lurking beneath, begging to be unleashed fully. The two of you got so comfortable even talking about your lives before was an option. It all came back to the star – to where you two were now.
“Been with us a few weeks now.”
“Approaching week eight,” you replied, adjusting the strap of the gun you still wore slung over your back. Negan had already remarked that you didn’t need to bring it along. 
“Remind me how long you were alone before that,” he feigned a normal amount of interest, though inside he was congratulating himself for finally getting the answers he wanted. 
“Eight months, give or take,” your reply caused him to whistle lowly, an appreciative sound. It was impressive to be alone for any amount of time, let alone eight months. You’d been rough when he’d found you – but even he didn’t know just how that time had passed for you. “Stopped keepin’ count.”
“You were alone all winter?”
“Uh huh,” you confirmed, glancing up at him to briefly meet his gaze. He shook his head, huffing out a deep breath as he thought about your words. It had been hell for him from the start – for everyone, really…but you’d been living a different nightmare altogether.  
“You’re an impressive woman, you know that?” he drawled, your cheeks heating up over his flirtatious affection. Even as he walked he focused his attention on you – it was too much, and yet just his eyes on you wasn’t nearly enough. “Who’s the last person you were with?” 
You paused, but not for long – not longer than an arm’s length.
“Used to be my neighbor,” you replied simply, eyes suddenly focused on anything else. Already Fall, the leaves had long turned their seasonal vibrant shades. There was still some beauty in the world, and you were keen on admiring it as often as the universe allowed.
“He help you when it all went to shit?”
You knew the question was coming, and it still sucked the wind from you, replacing it with a familiar feeling of dread. It was a conversation you’d avoided for weeks now – it was coming eventually. 
“He took me when it all went to shit,” you replied simply, stopping in your tracks to pick some ripe berries on a nearby bush. He was intent to watch you work and happy for the break on his feet. “Kept me in his basement. Called me his wife.”
“Jesus, I…”
“Do not apologize,” you snapped, avoiding his eyes now. A hint of blue caught your eye close to the ground and you quickly shined a flashlight, confirming berries were growing on a bush. You motioned with your head to Negan to follow. “He ain’t worth it.”
“You escape then?” he questioned, burying the urge to ask you exactly what being the man’s wife meant exactly – he had some idea. For all the horrors in the outside world, the thought of the horrors you’d faced in a basement for months made his blood boil. It made his skin crawl worse than any walker he’d seen so far.
And he’s seen a lot of nasty ones.
He hoped the world had claimed a piece of shit like that. 
“In a manner of speaking,” you replied as you crouched down, picking one of the ripe berries and rolling it between your fingers to test it before popping it into your mouth, savoring the sweetness. As you picked the berries you alternated between pocketing them in a pouch on your jacket and handing them to him. “I killed him one night. Just…had enough. Snapped. Ripped his throat out with m’teeth.”
Yeah. You were definitely his favorite.
Snarling approaching disrupted the conversation, both of your heads snapping in the direction of the sound as you each took a step inward to be closer to one another. Your hand reached out, grasping around his that held the smooth wood of the bat. 
“Lemme try this one,” you stated, smiling up at him with a wicked twinkle in your eye that pulled at his heart. He slid the weapon into your hand slowly, watching as you turned on your heel to stalk your way toward the growling, grotesque man – Gary, from the looks of his RadioShack nametag. He was certain he could remember a comic book character or two that had swung their hips as they wound up a bat at their side as you were now. 
The first crack of wood against skull had him clapping, looking on with pride.
“There you go,” he encouraged, his voice a tone you were certain you’d only heard him use with you. “Look at ya.”
The second remark was intended to stay mental, but left his mouth as a low, appreciative grumble, sending a wave of heat straight to your core. His steps carried him close enough behind you to intervene if he was needed, and he was close enough now to your back you could feel his breath on your neck. 
“Got another one comin’,” he pointed over your shoulder toward the tree line, smiling when you immediately took a step toward it.
“I got ‘er.”
The first under your belt now, you understood the weight of the barbwire-wrapped wood, and the first swing was perfect precise, enough force connecting with its head to send it to the ground. Every swing after that was purely for show – for him. He knew it, and he loved it. 
“Atta girl,” he cooed, walking closer behind you again. “Goddamn natural.”
“All done,” you breathed out heavy as you stood straight, admiring your work for a moment before beginning to turn back to him. “Gonna have to get me one of these.”
You had barely turned and finished your words when his hands grasped your face, pulling you in to press his lips to yours hard and desperate – starved. The gasp that slipped from you was muffled by his lips as you returned his kiss just as heavy, clutching to the collar of his jacket with the hand that didn’t hold Lucille. 
One of his hands slid to your hip first, pulling you closer to him as his fingers brushed against your jaw, his tongue gliding along the seam of your lips to encourage them apart. As your mouth fell open for him and he tasted you his hand continued downward, grasping your backside and pulling you in closer. 
The bulge at his waist was unmistakable, the mere sight of you bloodied and vicious causing his cock to strain in his pants immediately. You released your hold on his collar as your tongue danced with his to slide it downward, cupping the sizable bulge and giving a light squeeze. The groan that rumbled in his chest had you clenching your thighs together tighter, desperate for some pressure of your own. 
“Oh, you fuckin’ naughty thing…” he grumbled against your lips, releasing you just enough so you both could catch your breath. He nipped at your bottom lip lightly, pulling a quiet moan from your lips. You felt his cock twitch in his jeans. “Couldn’t help myself, you looked so damn sexy swingin’ Lucille around like that…”
You pressed your lips to his again, eager to show him your appreciation for his continued praise but finding the words didn’t exist in your mind – all that existed was need for him. To your dismay a hearty chuckle rumbled in his chest, his lips curving to a smile against yours. 
“Can’t fuck you right here, darlin’,” he cooed, nipping at your bottom lip again out of refusal to outright return your kiss. “Too many dead in these trees. Not the kind of eyes I want on us.”
When you gave his cock another slow squeeze his eyes narrowed as he grunted, his hips thrusting forward to meet your hand for the pressure. Your eyes burned into his as he gazed down at your lips. “We should head back to the sanctuary then.”
“We should,” the hesitation was evident in his voice, the desire making it honey thick and low. His blown pupils and deep breaths combined with that voice let you know everything he really wanted. He leaned forward to press a long, heavy kiss to your lips, his hand sliding to the back of your neck where he caressed you gently. The whine that fell from your lips only made him grin more. 
It should have been obvious that batting lessons with him would end up like this.
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“‘C’mere, pretty girl,” Negan instructed the moment the two of you were tucked away into his room together, his legs sprawled wide as he dropped onto the leather couch that sprawled across his room. He’d been supporting you with an arm around your waist nearly the entire walk back, through the gates and to his room, your legs shaking just from kissing him. 
He took every opportunity the two of you were within sight of someone else since returning to show things had escalated, pressing kisses to your temple, and grasping your waist so tight and so low – friendly behavior was left in the past. He’d even considered pinning you to the fence and fucking you right there – for anyone awake in the middle of the night or on guard to see – but he decided against it. 
For now, anyway. 
You nodded as you made your way to him, climbing into his lap carefully, your legs straddling his thighs as your arms locked around his neck. One of his hands found a home on your cheek again, cradling it gently as his callused thumb brushed across your cheekbone. You leaned to his affection as naturally as you breathed. 
“Did such a good job out there,” he complimented with a lightness to his voice you hadn’t heard before, not even when the two of you had been alone. While there was always something behind his gaze – appreciation, desire, hunger – now it held so many things so entirely new. There was a newfound intimacy to how his eyes roamed your face, searching your own for matching emotions. “Gonna have to take you out with me some more.”
He drank in the smile his compliment earned, breathing out deeply as you turned your head to press your lips to his palm. Your eyes continued to burn into his. “Whenever you ask me to.”
“Oh, you’re not gonna be out of my sight after tonight, sweetheart,” he stated, his tone unwavering and absolute. You believed him. “Attached at the hip.”
“Mm,” you hummed as you pondered his words, eyes raking over his face. One of your hands slid to rest on his cheek as well, your thumb brushing over his bottom lip gently. You were teasing him, merely taunting – he knew. “I don’t remember us talkin’ about that.”
You’d seen this smirk on his face before. Now, as his face inched closer and his breath ghosted over your lips, it sent a flood of arousal straight to your aching cunt – you’d been wet since the kiss in the woods. 
“You won’t wanna be away from me after tonight,” he laughed, soft and low as his hand slid from your cheek to the back of your head, pulling you closer to claim your lips in a heavy kiss again. 
“Hope you’re prepared to back up all that talk, Negan,” you breathed against his lips when he released you, leaning closer to nip at his bottom lip as you slowly rocked your hips against his waist, grinding your covered, soaked core against the throbbing erection in his pants.
“Fuck,” he groaned, his hand not holding the back of your head seizing hold on your hip to steady you as you continued to rut against him. His tone was dark, low – much-more desire filled than it had ever been for you. “You need somethin’, pretty girl? Could ask nicely.”
“Need you, Negan,” you whined, grinding down particularly slowly as one of your hands began to work at the zipper of his jacket. “S-so fucking tired of waitin’. Don’t make me beg.”
“Bet you’d sound pretty though.”
You opened your mind to protest but were quickly silenced by another heavy kisses, his tongue immediately seeking yours out for the newfound dance he loved as his hands abandoned their hold on you to start removing your clothes. 
He instructed you to stand just long enough to remove your blood-stained pants and t-shirt, his eyes running over your legs and lingering on your thighs and core. He pointed with a thick finger to the bed behind him, rising to his feet to remove his own jacket and shirt as you did what was instructed, sitting on the bed. 
You’d figured his room was comfortable – but this was luxury. 
“Lemme see,” he breathed in this new husky tone as his shirt was pulled over his head, his muscles flexing as he did so. The scars that graffitied his torso raised more questions – you wanted to ask about each one, press kisses to them, run your fingers on the particularly nasty ones – you’d do that later. For now, you leaned back on the bed slightly, propping yourself up with one arm as you spread your legs for him. 
His tongue darted out from his lips as his eyes ran over your soaked core, his steps carrying him closer until he was in front of you, within reach of his hands again. One of his hands ran up the inside of your thigh slowly, the other reaching to push a finger against your chin to tilt your head upward.
“Look at me,” he cooed, cupping your cheek again as he ran two fingers through your soaked folds, spreading your arousal through them more with an appreciative hum. “So wet for me already. Walked back from the woods like this I’ll bet.”
You whimpered lightly as he continued to run his fingers back and forth, breathing out shaky as you nodded up at him, pupils blown wide and lips fallen open. He took advantage of your partially open mouth to slip a finger in, groaning when you immediately closed your lips around it to suck lightly. 
He’d waited too damn long for this.
He slipped his index finger into your waiting heat, cock twitching in his pants when he felt your tight walls engulf his finger. A moan sounded in your chest that vibrated around his finger as you swirled your tongue – his eyes seemed to grow darker by the second. When he’d fully sheathed his finger in you he curled it, stroking your soft inner walls as he removed his finger to hear you moan. 
“Tight little thing, aren’t you?” he cooed, removing his finger before he pumped it back into you with the company of a second, curling them both to stroke behind your clit. You keened, hips thrusting forward to meet his hand that was soaked with your arousal, head surging forward to claim his lips with your own kiss. 
He chuckled against your lips as he began to pump his fingers, ensuring the palm of his hand rubbed against your clit with each re-entry. Touch-starved and desperate your legs were already shaking, your tongue eagerly tasting his mouth. You hardly registered his free hand drop to his own waistband, working his belt and tight jeans free before kicking them to the floor.
The sound of the fabric hitting the ground was your realization, and without freeing him from the kiss you reached between your bodies to wrap your fingers around his long, thick shaft, your thumb rubbing along the pronounced vein. He pulled away from your lips to groan deeply, looking into your eyes with a fire ignited so bright it burned.
Another moan fell from your lips with a particularly hard thrust of his fingers, though it didn’t stop you from removing your hand from his cock to spit on it. Wrapping your hand back around his throbbing length you began to stroke him slowly, grasping with the perfect amount of pressure to cause his eyes to roll back slightly. 
“Fuckin’ hell, baby,” he groaned, running his nose along your jaw before pressing a kiss beneath your ear. “You – fuck – you keep doin’ that and I’m not gonna be able to taste you. Don’t make me tie those pretty hands up.”
You whimpered and defiantly gave his cock several more strokes before releasing your hold, unwilling to have your hands restricted – the first time with him, anyway. As he sank to his knees on the hard floor in front of you, you drank in the sight, keening when he scissored his fingers inside of you. He pressed a kiss to your knee before he trailed his lips upward, inhaling the scent of your arousal deep into his lungs. 
“Negan…” you began to protest slightly in bashfulness, and he only chuckled in response, pressing a kiss high up on your thigh before he gave your clit a gentle lick. 
“Hush,” he cooed, removing his fingers from you to run his tongue through your folds slowly with a low, appreciative groan. 
You forgot any argument you had intended to present when he finished the swipe of his tongue by flicking the warm muscle against your clit again before sucking it briefly. He savored every moan he pulled from you, how your breath began to become desperate as he fucked his tongue into your wet heat repeatedly, reaching to rub his thumb around your clit repeatedly and fast. He was like a man starved for months in the way his tongue devoured you, alternating between fucking into you and licking slowly to swallow as much of your arousal as he could.
“Good god you taste good,” he complimented from between your legs, pulling back to speak and press a kiss to your clit, then your inner thigh. He nipped at the spot carefully, just enough to bruise. “No fuckin’ way I’m lettin’ this pussy go. No way.”
“Maybe you’ll change your mind when you fuck me,” you managed to stammer out, your voice pitched higher as he reached to rub your clit again, smiling up at you wickedly. You were already glowing for him practically…he couldn’t wait to see you fucked out.
He was torn between wondering if your mouth was still running, he wasn’t doing his job well enough; or if your mouth wasn’t running if he’d even like you anymore. 
“Not a chance in hell,” he murmured before slipping his fingers back into you, leaning forward to claim your clit between his lips again with a soft suck.
It wasn’t long before your legs were shaking on either side of his head, clenching harder as the pressure built up in you heavier and heavier, threatening to burst. When he nipped at the sensitive bundle of nerves with his teeth lightly it erupted, your orgasm flooding from you as you moaned loudly. White overtook your vision, heat swallowing you whole. 
He removed his fingers to connect his mouth and tongue to you again, savoring as much of the liquid gold that hadn’t covered his face. When he pulled away from you he muttered compliments into your thighs, hips, stomach, and breasts as you came down from the orgasm. He was circling his tongue around one of your budded nipples when your vision became clearer, looking up at you with an adoration filled smile.
You already knew he was right – you would never want to be away from him again.
“There she is,” he cooed, releasing your breast from his mouth to lean upward and press a gentle kiss to your lips – uncharacteristically gentle. It occurred to you now that you were unlocking a side to Negan you decided likely no one had seen since the outbreak. 
You tasted yourself on his tongue as he deepened the kiss, now encouraging you to move back on the bed and lay flat. He leaned over you, supporting his weight with one arm so he could continue to stroke your side gently. When he released your lips again, he bit into the bottom one a little harder, a little more desperate and unhinged, much closer to the Negan you knew, before he pressed a kiss to your forehead. 
Duality – nothing about Negan made sense and yet everything about him was exactly as it should be.
“Now you can beg,” he whispered against your forehead lightly. You felt his lips curve into a smile. “Just a little. Lemme hear how nice you can be, pretty girl.”
“Negan, jesus christ, not now,” you whimpered, raising your hips to press up into his. It pulled a groan from you but he only grasped your hip tight to steady you. “Please, please not now. I can’t…I can’t wait. Please fuck me.”
And it was a blur of pleases and whimpers then until he was satisfied, your words devolving into moderately incoherent babble as you kissed his neck, his chest, dragged your hands over his torso…you were begging him in every way you could. Finally, he conceded, tilting your head up to kiss your lips again gently.
“C’mere, sweetheart, I got ya,” he cooed, lifting your hips up to slide a pillow under them. He ran one hand slowly down your leg, grasping your ankle to lift the singular leg up over his shoulder. He leaned down to kiss you again, fisting his length before he ran the velvet head through your slick folds. 
He groaned as he sank into you, breathing out deep as your warm channel welcomed him home. Your eyes rolled back, quiet moans falling from your lips. 
“Holy hell,” he breathed against your lips as he pressed several light kisses to them, resting his forehead against yours briefly as he bottomed out. He stilled for a moment to allow you to adjust to the fullness of him, one of his hands grasping your hip tightly, the other fondling one of your breasts. He couldn’t get enough of you. “Fuck, you feel good.”
He kissed you reverently then, deep and passionate and fulfilling as he found himself enchanted by being inside you finally. 
“F-feel so full…” you muttered against his lips, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes already. He pulled back with a final kiss to bump his nose against yours, a light hum rumbling in his chest as he dragged his cock from you slowly before working each inch in again.
“I know, baby, but you’re taking me so well,” he breathed out lightly, ducking his head to kiss down your neck lightly. He began to suck marks into the skin – the more exposed they’d be later, the better. “Look so fuckin’ pretty, too.”
“Negan,” you whined, raising your hips off the pillow slightly, wiggling slightly. He removed his hand from your breast to grab both of your hips, his tongue clicking against the back of his teeth before he bit down onto your shoulder. 
“Fuck, baby. You’re so tight,” he groaned as he repeated the slow removal and thrust back into you again, savoring how your walls gripped him with each entry. “I’m gonna wreck you.”
“Please,” was the unexpected reply that filled his ears, and from there, he was insatiable.
He thrust into you hard, heavy, each time slowing enough to ensure the tip of his cock rubbed against the sensitive patch a couple of inches inside of you before he thrusted the rest of the way relentlessly. He didn’t let up – his hips didn’t falter as your walls fluttered around him, his pace consistent and desperate.
When he connected a thumb to your clit and began rubbing circles you felt the tears spill down your cheeks. He keened and raised his head to kiss one of them away, rubbing figure eights on the sensitive bundle of nerves. 
“Negan, t-too much…” you whimpered, legs shaking again. He leaned up and away from your face to kneel, keeping one of your legs over his shoulder. The new angle was deeper, the head of his cock occasionally knocking against your cervix. Each cry it pulled from your chest made his cock throb more.
“I won’t finish ‘til you gush on my cock like you did on my face,” he breathed out, eyes burning into yours with a frenzied look in his eyes. As you whimpered he flicked your clit, turning the quiet sound into a loud scream. It was the brightest smile of the night from him – dimples on full display as an low groan sounded in his chest. “That’s right, baby, let the whole sanctuary know. Scream my fuckin’ name.”
He removed his hand from you to spit on your clit, continuing to grin as you gasped at the cold liquid running down you. He smeared the liquid around before he started rubbing your clit again harder, his thrusts now becoming sloppy and desperate. He was chasing his own release and coaxing you closer to yours – he wouldn’t finish until you had.
You gushed around his cock again while you screamed his name – certain at least one person in the sanctuary would be woken to the sounds of your pleasure in the early morning. The white-hot heat spread over you, blinding your vision, blurring the ceiling and him above you as you shook beneath him. 
Even with your walls clenching around him, he held off his own release. Just as you began to come back to him he slung your other leg over his shoulder to join the other, pressing you in half as he leaned over you. 
“My turn,” he growled, his words shaking and breathless. “’m gonna fill your little cunt up.”
You were weak, barely coherent – it didn’t stop your body from responding to him, to his assertion. It didn’t stop your walls from fluttering around him. Your nails dug into his back, breaking the skin – you were both certain there would be small trails of blood. He would wear the claw marks with pride.
“That’s right, you want me to fill you up,” he cooed, reaching to press a kiss to your lips again. “Let fuckin’ everybody know who you belong to.”
“D-do it,” you whimpered, moving your head to press a kiss to his jaw. His thrusts became impossibly harder, and only faltered when you pressed a kiss below his ear, whispering in a breathless, husky tone. “Fill me up, daddy.”
A growl ripped through his chest, his lips crashing to yours in a bruising kiss. It only took a few harder, bruising, crippling thrusts before you felt his cock twitch in you. He released you from the kiss to lean his forehead against yours, eyes squeezing shut as he emptied thick ropes of his seed into you. 
When he had emptied his full load into you he removed his cock, leaning back to admire the sight of his cum leaking from you. 
“There’s still somethin’ beautiful in this world,” he muttered with his shit-eating grin plastered to his face, his hair messy and stuck to his forehead with a thin sheen of sweat. You giggled, returning his smile as you shook your head at his usual bullshit returning.
“Shut up, Negan,” you chastised, rolling your eyes. He only chuckled, leaning down to kiss you again before he rolled you to your side carefully, taking his position behind you. As his arms wrapped around your waist he slipped his still partially-hard cock back into your velvet walls, kissing between your shoulder blades with a smile on his lips as you gasped.
“That’s better, don’t have to worry about a mess,” he mumbled as he tucked his head into your neck, pressing light kisses beneath your ear repeatedly. He was warm, safe – the two of you felt whole together like this. 
Inseparable was correct. 
“Door ain’t locked…” you pointed out as you began to drift off to the first truly good night’s sleep since the world had gone to hell. His voice filled with sleep and low, he only chuckled before whispering his reply into your skin, his lips brushing with each word.
“I do not care.”
masterlist.
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1K notes · View notes
idyllcy · 1 year
Text
saying we're just friends, thinking you're my man
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word count: 11.3k
warnings: non-explicit smut, heavy making out
summary: Distance gives the soul time to think, and Tim thinks he's in love with you.
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It's a textbook relationship.
Tim can't count the number of times he's read a fic like this.
In fact, he can already imagine the tags on your love story. Strangers to lovers, Friends to Lovers, Fateful Encounter, Alternate Universe - College, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn... the list goes on. You'd probably have a field day trying to finish the story inspired by the one the two of you experienced. Though, as he brushes his fingers through your hair in the kisses of the morning sun, he wouldn't have it any other way — even if he couldn't form a coherent thought when you were awake and talking to him. God, you make him weak.
In the blaring heat of August at orientation, you landed right at his feet after getting shoved around in the crowd of students.
"You good?" He holds his hand for you, and you take it, pulling yourself up.
"Sorry! They're quite a crowd." You laugh awkwardly. "I'm, uh—" Your name tumbled past your lips, an apologetic smile on your face, explaining to him that you were trying to get to the English building through the crowd of students. Tim told you his name (only first in fear you'd recognize his last) and showed you a shortcut to the building. You had taken the messily scribbled image, airdropped it onto your phone, and you had rushed off with a thank you yelled into the air. Tim hadn't thought much about you. It wasn't as if you'd be in the same department as him. He also had minimal GE classes, so—
Two days later, you sit next to him in his only GE class. He was required to take English regardless of his previous experience with it. His AP classes hadn't been kind enough to remove the requirement. Not even the fives on both of his English APs could have helped him avoid the expository hell all freshmen were required to take. So, he meets eyes with you as you apologize for sitting next to him, confessing that he was the only face you knew.
"So? What's your major?" You blink at him curiously as the class waits for the professor.
"I'm in Cybersecurity."
"Woah." You mumble. "Stem..."
"You?"
"Creative Writing." You grin. "Well, build your own major. But Creative Writing nonetheless."
"A writer?"
"Yeah."
Tim had watched as you played Minecraft the entirety of class, only skimming through the syllabus for his late work, absence, and attendance policies. He's not sure if you even caught the way the professor mentioned there was a syllabus quiz next class. Though it wasn't his job to tell you, but he still felt kind of bad if you were to fail it. He passes you a note, and you pause your game, glancing at the note. You grin at him, opening your phone and showing him your reminder. You go back to your Minecraft world for the rest of class, information going in one ear and out the other. (Tim found out later that you actually listen, and gaming was only a focus tactic you used.)
At the end of class, you save your world, push your chair in, and sprint for the door.
Tim shared no other classes with you. In fact, the two of you only had one class together for all four years of your college lives. Yet, there was something about you that had stuck with him. He didn't know what it was, but he hadn't felt that giddy over someone since his last relationship, his heart racing in his chest, his head spinning. He pushed everything down in favor of being able to pay attention in class. Though his coding skills were spectacular, his writing skills were less than stellar. He didn't understand how writing just came to you.
Especially not when you fell asleep halfway through your first monthly timed essay and still scored a 97. He could learn a thing or two from you, maybe. Were you doing memory consolidation in the middle of the exam? He has no idea how you did it.
Your name slips past his lips as you pack up after one class.
"Yeah?" You tilt your head at him.
"Are you," he pauses, (a little embarrassed. Tim Drake, son of Bruce Wayne, CEO of WE, was in need of help. Of course he was a little embarrassed.) "down to tutor me? My grade in this class is less than... acceptable." He grimaces at how his voice goes quiet.
You smile. "Yeah. I'm down. I'll give you my number and schedule and we can arrange a time. Expository writing isn't that bad. It's just the same sentence structure with some BS and then you're done."
"Easy for you to say," He hands you his phone.
"No. It's just like how you have structure when you code." You click your number in, texting yourself and saving his contact before you forget. "There is structure in everything you do."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." You beam at him.
Tim's next essay comes back with an 81. It's a big improvement from the 64 he scored the first time. You were right, the essays being the same thing over and over again. The structure is as easy as basic coding is to him. He understands you now.
He thanks you by taking you to the diner, paying for your meal.
You kick your legs at the booth, milkshake straw between your lips, lost in thought.
"Penny for your thoughts?" He raises a brow.
"Tim... what's your last name?" You frown. "It's fine if you don't tell me, but my friends have been asking who I've been tutoring and I realized I have no idea what your last name is."
"It's Drake." He scans your face for something when he tells you.
"Drake..." You pause, letting go of the milkshake straw. "huh. Like the CEO." You go back to your milkshake after the revelation.
"Not surprised?"
"I mean," You grimace at him. "You wear the down-low designer brands your adoptive father does, so not really. I had my suspicions, but I didn't want to pry in case you didn't want to tell."
"Down-low designer brands?"
"Bruce Wayne has a specific way of dressing casual." You bite on your straw. "I know this sounds creepy but I've done more research on brands billionaires wear than I'd like to admit."
"Does it have to do with your writing?" Tim thanks the waiter as his order is brought.
"Yeah." You smile sheepishly. "Is that creepy? Sorry."
"No. I've been expecting the unexpected from you for a while now."
You laugh. "Yeah?"
"I have an older brother who writes in his free time and the amount of things he's done for research is crazy."
"Right? Reddit and Quora are my saviors." You mumble. "I obviously can't kill for research, so the internet is my best friend."
"Do you search on incognito?"
"No. I prefer being able to dig up my weird research from my search history." You shrug. "I bet the FBI has me on a watchlist."
"I could check if you'd like."
You feign a look of shock. "Really?"
He smiles at you, and the two of you burst into laughter.
"You going to Connor's Halloween party next week?" You finish the last of your milkshake.
"Of course not." He deadpans. "Must I remind you I hate going out?"
"Awh," You pout. "I wanted someone to match maid dresses with."
"Excuse me?"
"For research."
The smile on your face suggests anything but.
"You can consider it as payment for all the times I'm going to tutor you."
"I've been paying you."
"No." You shake your head. "You pay me each time we have a session. I'm letting you pay me for the rest of the lessons by showing up to the Halloween party in a maid dress with me."
Tim looks at you incredulously.
"Actually, I'll even draft a contract if you don't believe me." You smile.
"And if I turn you down?"
"I'll find one of my friends to do it with."
"Then why ask me?"
"The thrill of the unknown? The endless answers you could have chosen? A grasp on your character better? It could be anything." You smile sweetly at him. "It's fine. You can continue paying me like you normally do."
"Who would you match with if not me?"
"Well, I was thinking Sam or someone else," You shrug. "but Sam doesn't celebrate Halloween. I'd match with the other guy friend, but one of my friends is into him so I don't want to make it seem like I'm making a move on someone I know she likes."
"So you asked me?"
"I don't know, Tim." You shrug. "You tell me. I thought you were a genius."
He leans in to read your face better. "I'd say you asked me because you're interested in me."
"Bingo." You grin wider this time.
"It's been less than two months."
"And? Hasn't stopped people from already hooking up." You shrug. "You can say no."
"See, I'd say yes, but Connor would take a photo and it would end up in our groupchat's blackmail folder." Tim slides his fries to the middle when he catches you staring. "You can have one."
"I thought you were a master hacker?" You pick a fry from the carton.
"Yeah, but friend code."
"Ah." You nod slowly. "It's okay to say no. I won't get offended."
"Maybe next year." Tim shakes his head.
"No worries!"
Tim stalks your Instagram on the day of Halloween, staring at the post where you're matching maid dresses with your entire friend group. In the back of his mind, he wonders, for a brief moment, if it would have just been you and him if he had agreed. The thought disappears just as fast, sighing as he puts his phone down and domino mask on. He had patrol. He could think about his mess of emotions later. Gotham needs him.
Your breath hitches from the spiked punch, your friends long lost in the crowd, your head spinning as you stumble onto the balcony of the apartment, resting your head on the cool of the metal railing, trying to calm the thumping of your head. You hear something rustle in front of you, the sound of someone swinging, and you open an eye to get a look. Your breath catches in your throat at the sight of Red Robin.
"Hey—"
"Dude... your costume looks way too realistic." You press your fingers to his armor, pulling him onto the balcony with you, mumbling under your breath as you feel him up through his costume. The smell of alcohol is apparent on your lips, the smell of your perfume flooding his senses — your cheeks are flushed beyond repair, and Tim finds himself frozen in place as you practically straddle him, fingers running to his face. His eyes dart to your cleavage unconsciously, staring back up to meet your eyes when he sees too much. You look sinful like this. His breath catches in his throat as he tries to loosen your grip on him without accidentally throwing you off, and he finally presses a hand of his to your stomach, successfully getting you to stop.
"Sorry." You mumble.
"No worries." He rasps, pushing you back onto your seat gently — heart drumming in his head.
"Ey, Red Robin!" Connor calls from inside the house. "You made it!"
"I'm not here to party. I was checking in on you to see if you were being responsible." He sighs.
You blink at him, doe-eyed, fascinated, drunken stupor all over your face.
"You're real?"
"Yes." He mumbles.
"Sorry for touching you."
"You're forgiven."
You lean back into your seat with an exhale, pulling out your phone as Connor leads Tim further into the party. He speaks to Oracle to let her know where he was, and he exhales when she tells him B says it's fine. He nods at the people who compliment his costume as he passes them, and he grabs himself a cup of punch, pausing when the alcohol stings his tongue. He dumps it in Connor's sink, eyes trailing to where you were sitting, breath catching in his throat at the sight of some sleaze slinging his arm around you. He rushes over to you, fingers smoothing down your neck to your shoulders, warning smile on his face.
"She has company for the night."
The man scrambles as you look up at him, beaming. His breath catches in his throat.
"Careful. I might just take you home."
"Don't you dorm?" He raises a brow in amusement.
"No one said my home." You turn around to reach for his jaw, fingers trailing down, breath fanning his. Tim would let you do this. He really would. He'd kiss you senseless on the balcony at Connor's house, yet he knows better than to do so. You're drunk from the punch. He'd be taking advantage of you no matter how much you want this when sober. So, he runs his thumb over your bottom lip, forehead meeting yours, every ounce of his willpower pulled into not just kissing you senseless here. If only you were sober. The things he would do.
"Where is she — babes! Time to go!" Your friend breaks the tension for him, pulling you away from him with a nod, alcohol riding off of her as well. He wonders if your driver is tipsy.
"I wanna go home with Red Robin..." You mumble, and your friend smacks you playfully. He notices one of you is sober, and he supposes that's enough. He heads back inside to find Connor.
Tim notices you miss class the next day. You text him to ask him to record the lecture for you, telling him the Halloween party was lit and you remember almost making out with a guy but your friend cockblocked you. Tim holds back a laugh in class, letting you know he'd email you his notes with the lecture recording. You thank him with an image, going offline immediately after. He clicks on his laptop, noting down whatever you might need. The recording would cover the rest. He sends everything at the end of class, your response instant. It wouldn't matter if you were absent from class. Your grade could take a hit.
He answers his phone when you dial him.
"Hey?"
"Timmers, you got Tylenol?"
"I can buy you some?" He offers. "I don't have class after this."
"Please? Oh, and throw in that one specific brand of bottled tea. I'll send you a photo." You grumble.
"Are you feeling better?"
"Like a dead girl walking."
"Taking that as a no. Want anything else?"
"I'll Venmo you the money. Bring me the receipt."
"You're sick. You can pay me back by actually being in class next lecture."
"Not hard. My head just hurts from the hangover."
"I'm guessing you got home safe?" Tim steps into the convenience store.
"Yeah. Our driver was sober. Thankfully."
Tim grabs the Tylenol and pauses. "I need the tea."
"Which convenience store are you in?"
"Metro."
"Aisle three by the American soda. It's green with white writing. You can read Chinese, right? It's Japanese but it says tea in Chinese."
"How'd you know?" Tim pauses. "Unsweetened green tea? The Japanese one?"
"Yeah. It helps a lot." You sniff. "Found out on google because someone made a compilation of you speaking foreign languages."
"So you assumed?"
"The part where you speak Cantonese, you were reading from a menu."
"Are you stalking me?"
"I'd prefer doing research."
"Stalking."
"Whatever helps you sleep at night."
Tim checks out, tapping his phone to pay. He takes the bag and pauses at the sight of the instant noodles. "You sure you don't want anything else?"
"Nothing. Feel free to get what you need too."
Tim hears you drink something.
"I'll text you my dorm building and number. There's no pin to get in just let them know you're here to see me. I'm pretty close with the RA."
"Networking already, huh?"
"Whatever you want to call it."
You text him your dorm building and number, and he knocks on your door.
You open it with a weak push of your arm.
"Are you actually sick?"
"No." You thank him as he hands you the plastic bag. You pop two pills out, swallowing them with the tea. "I'm extremely hungover. I drank too much punch."
"And you didn't realize?"
"No. I was trying to drink my thoughts away." You sniff. "So? How'd you spend yesterday?"
"Handing out candy at the manor with Bruce." Which was a lie. He spent Halloween using every last drop of self-control to not kiss your drunk self senseless at Connor's place. He can still smell your perfume.
"Sounds boring."
"I do it every year." He shrugs. Also a lie. He spends every Halloween patrolling Gotham because it's the one night of the year where every single criminal decides it's alright to go apeshit.
"mm," You yawn. "I matched maid dresses with my friend group. I posted about it. Do you have insta?"
"No. I keep a low profile."
"So you don't have a private account?" You raise a brow.
"I do, but what makes you think we're close enough for it?" Tim mirrors your raise of brow.
You hold your hand to your mouth, pretending to be offended. "We're not close enough for it?"
"I'm kidding." He mumbles. "What's your handle? I'll follow you."
"You better not turn down my request." You reach for the green tea again, drinking it as you show him your account. He already knows your account. He figured he'd have to ask or else he'd be a hypocrite for calling you his stalker. Well, he's already a hypocrite.
"Ough!" You sit up straighter, reaching for your laptop. "Connor sent me these photos that the photographer caught of me and Red Robin" You swoon.
"You're into him?"
You blink at him. "Did I not tell you I run his stan account?"
"You do wHAT." He freezes. "Are you the girl who gets caught up on the news every other week because you accidentally fall while taking photos of him?"
"Yep." You grin. "He's my favorite Robin."
Tim was extremely conflicted at the discovery. In retrospect, he should have known from the way you seemed to climb all over him and pull him onto the balcony without second thought, but he's still embarrassed at the idea that you had fawned all over him. Yet he shakes his thoughts away as he peers over your shoulder to stare at the photos caught of the two of you — well, of you. You didn't know he was Red Robin.
There's a photo of you straddling him, feeling him up, and Tim's neck snaps to the side.
"Tim? You good? You don't need to look if you're uncomfortable, you know?" You remind.
"No," He swallows. "I wasn't expecting photos like this."
"Isn't the photographer good? I'd pay this guy to take photos of me at parties any day."
"Yeah?" Tim raises a brow as you show him the other two. One of him with his fingers on your collar, the other of his forehead pressed to yours, thumb between the two of you's lips. You explain to him in excitement that you would have kissed him had your friend not pulled you away because you needed to leave. Tim rests his back on your closet, nodding along slowly. He had homework to do. Yet he spent the rest of the afternoon in your room listening to you ramble about Red Robin, conspiracies reminding him of someone.
"So let me get this straight." Tim interrupts. "I'm on a time crunch. I have something for one of my compsci classes due soon and wanted to get the big picture."
"Oh. I'm sorry for—"
"Don't." He holds his hand out. "I stayed. You run the biggest Red Robin stan account on Twitter and you're planning on posting those photos like he's some kpop idol?"
"Yeah?" You tilt your head.
"Are the fans not going to get mad that he's making out with someone at a party?"
"No." You laugh. "His fans are used to him being in relationships. The most they'd do is figure out who that is, which is me, but that's it."
"You won't get death threats?"
"His fans aren't crazy."
"Yeah? You seem pretty mental to me."
You gasp. "Rude." You look to the side, sucking your cheeks in. "But not wrong."
"Yeah. If you denied it, I'd just pull up every single time you'd fallen while trying to get good photos of Red Robin."
You pout. "Shoo. You said you had something due soon."
"Last question."
"Shoot."
"You don't mind that he's never going to date you?"
"Timmers." You laugh. "He's a hero and I'm a fan. It's like asking me if I'm ever going to date a billionaire. It's impossible. Not written in the stars. It's a groundless dream."
"Yeah?" His own heart cracks a little when you mention a billionaire.
"Yeah." You smile. "Now do your work. You have a GPA to take care of."
"Got it."
Tim finds that nearing the end of the semester, you meet with him less and less, tutoring him on Zoom instead, apologizing, explaining that you had a ton of creative work due for your other classes. You had been planning on graduating early, he finds out. It was your freshman year, and you were trying to get your sophomore classes out of the way. He was bothered. It was incredible — the sheer amount of classes you took. It was more impressive that you had time to write your own creative works.
"So?"
"How did you score last time? I'm starting to think you have me tutor you still because you're into me." You joke.
"Ninety. All we have left is the stupid final."
"You're set then." You yawn. "Why still have me tutor you?"
Your mind wanders as you click on one of your assignments. "Oh, how about this, then? I have an interview I need to conduct for my journalism class, and you'd be the perfect candidate. I'm expected to record it in the building and it's due in three days."
"Three days?"
"I bet you have everything out of the way, huh?" You smile at him, batting your lashes. "Hm?"
Tim, does, in fact, have everything out of the way.
"And if I don't?" He likes teasing you.
"Then I'll ask one of my friends. The topic is the discussion of a topic you aren't familiar with. You're good with coding, something I can't do past basic HTML to edit how text looks." You hum. "I'm grappling at every excuse I can to hang out with you, if you can't tell."
"Oh, I definitely can."
"Great." You smile. "How does tomorrow at 8 in the morning sound?"
"So early?" Tim raises a brow.
"I'll bring us coffee. Give me your order."
"Sold."
Tim realizes at 3am that you never gave him a dress code. Should he show up in casual? Business casual? Semi-formal? Formal — no, formal attire seemed like too much. He grimaces as he's in the Batcave, irritation all over his face.
"Something wrong, Timmers?" Dick raises a brow.
"Yeah. What do you wear to an interview?"
"Depends what kind." Bruce answers, pulling the cowl from his head. "Who's the interviewer? Is it official?"
"A friend is interviewing me for a project."
"Final project or just a project?"
"Forgot to ask."
"You can't go wrong with semi-formal. Dress like old money." Dick hums. "Polo shirt and khakis. Throw in a sweater tied around your neck and you should be good to go."
"I agree." Bruce hums.
"Do you need to impress said friend?" Jason raises a brow from behind the two.
"Wh-what does that have to do with the interview?"
Jason smirks at the stutter. "Get Steph to dress you. She'd make you look good and dress for the occasion."
"I think I'll go with Dick's—"
"Half-buttoned dress shirt and dress pants." Steph cuts in, pausing. "No, that'll make you look desperate. Grey sweats, blazer, and a white tee. Dark colored blazer but NOT black."
"Why can't I just wear a polo shirt and just—"
"You want to look good, right? Roll the sleeves up to right before your elbows. Mess up your hair a little too."
Tim sighs. "It's winter."
"Drake. Do you want to look good for your crush?" Damian cuts in.
"She's not a crush-"
"Last time you said that you were still pining after your ex." Steph laughs. "If you really want to look casual just wear what you normally wear but add some perfume."
"She's interviewing me for my major." Tim finally gets to speak.
"Then just dress like you normally do." Dick pats him on the back with a laugh. "Hoodie and sweats. Wear a tee underneath if in case you get hot so you can pull it over your head and she can watch."
"Hey-"
"I agree with that." Steph smiles. "If you're lucky, your shirt will ride up a little and she'll get to see—"
"Got it!" Tim yells, groaning. "My usual clothing it is. I'll bring a blazer in case she does want me to dress semi formal."
"Attaboy." Bruce ruffles his hair as he makes his way up.
Tim groans. He's not going to get enough sleep for this.
You call him in the morning when the coffee shop you frequent isn't open.
"Mm?" Tim furrows his brows, morning voice evident.
"Coffee shop closed. You mind if I just make one at the convenience store for you?"
"Knock yourself out. You're early."
"I need to set up the equipment." You hum.
"What color should I wear?"
"Something not green. I'm in red. See you in an hour."
"See you." Tim mumbles back, ending the call. He sits up, bed hair evident, staring at himself in the mirror. The exhausted part of himself wants to go back to sleep, but the better part of him — the giddy, excited, coming-of-age-has-a-crush-on-someone part of him — has him sit up from sheer willpower. (something he finds he has a lot of when it comes to you) He gets out of bed, pulling for the clothes he prepped the night before, combing his hair for once. He'd like to look nice for the camera, for you, he thinks. It would be a little frustrating to see the stand-in CEO of WE dress so casually. He has some sort of reputation to hold up when he isn't a student. Though he supposes he's being interviewed as a student, so there's not much of a need to dress so well.
But he supposes he wants to impress you.
He arrives five minutes before 8, locking his car and knocking on the door to the room.
"Hey," You smile at him.
"You didn't lock the door." He locks it behind him. "In Gotham during winter?"
"I knew you'd be here early." You adjust the cameras. "Your coffee's on the table."
"Thank you," He takes off his coat, hanging it on the rack. "Can I know what questions you'll be asking me?"
"Next to your coffee." You yawn. "You're dressed nice."
"Is it too little?" He smiles at you apologetically.
"No. Not at all." You smile. "Not when I'm dressed like," You motion at yourself. "This."
"You look like a friend." He points.
"Honored." You laugh. "The cameras are set up. I rented the room until 11. Take your time with the coffee."
"You're asking about me?"
"Yeah." You laugh. "The goal is to gradually have you talk about why you chose your major so we can have a relatively deep conversation. It's an intro to interviewing course, but the professor's ultimate goal was to make sure we make at least one friend."
"Yeah?" Tim puts his coffee down, smile on his lips. "Am I that friend?"
"Yeah," You smile back at him. "You can ask me questions too. It's supposed to be a casual interview. I'll only ask you a question when we run out of things to talk about."
Tim discovers a symphony of information from you. You open your heart to him the same way he can to some extent, smile on his lips when he tells you about his days during high school and his earlier relationships, forgetting that this was an interview for your class and that you would probably have to go through hours of footage in response to this. The plush of the seat is warm underneath him, your voice is a melody to his ears, Tim nodding along as you tell him about the one time you snuck out of the house as a teenager and got your ass beat because you got caught. The smile on your lips is contagious, he finds. He hadn't fallen for someone this hard since his ex.
Tim took you to lunch that day, desperate to get to know more about you, desperate to know you. He would have called it a date if you had let him.
You had your laptop pulled up, sorting through the footage (the three hour long footage) of the two of you's conversation, nodding along and rambling casually, clicking through to cut more personal matters from the interview, only required to give your teacher a clip and the raw file's total length to prove that you two hadn't just staged a conversation. You take a fry from his plate, your sandwich finished on your plate, humming when you finish editing.
"Are you always this fast?"
"Depends on what context." You wink.
"You were pretty fast to upload those new Red Robin photos too." If he noticed the sexual connotation of your words, he didn't mention anything.
"Well, other than lighting, I don't really need to edit anything."
"Speaking of which, do you even pay tuition?"
"Martha Wayne Scholarship." You yawn. "Your dad is looaaaded."
You submit your assignment to Canva, yawning. "That was my last one."
"You finished all those writing assignments?"
"Writing comes to me like hacking does to you." You close your laptop, tucking it into your bag. "Thanks for lunch, by the way."
"Mhm." He smiles. "Glad you liked your sandwich."
"My favorite." You hum. "So? Any updates? New girl? New boy? Relationship? Your dad adopted a new sibling? What's new?"
"Siblings keep teasing me."
"Oh? For what? For me?" You press a hand to your chest, wiggling your brows at him. You burst into laughter when he turns red. "Yeah? Because of me?"
"I asked them what I should wear to an interview, and suddenly they were asking me if I had a girlfriend."
"Yeah? So what did you tell them?"
"Interview from a friend." His eyes meet yours, eerily sincere. "Why?"
(the use of friend leaves a pang in your chest)
"Curious." You shrug. "So? Going anywhere for vacation?"
"Just Christmas at the Wayne Manor. You know, the rich people gala?"
You shudder, laughing. "Good luck."
"I'll need it. God knows who else I have to network with that night."
"Well, my dorm's open if you want it." You shrug. "But I doubt Bruce would let you leave since you are the CEO."
"Stand-in." He corrects.
"CEO nonetheless." You hum. "Should I send you a Christmas present?"
"What would you even send me?"
"It would be a surprise."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
Tim finds a gift from you under the Christmas tree, presumably placed there by Alfred. He had missed when you dropped it off, knocked out in the warmth of his bed without the pressure of an exam for once, letting himself ignore the cases he promised himself he'd solve. He promised you he'd get one day of proper sleep. Your texts are the only ones that cause his phone to vibrate during break. (He's down horrendously bad for you, Jason had whispered to Dick while Tim had responded to your message, lovesick grin on his face.)
Distance gives the soul time to think, and Tim thinks he's in love with you.
It comes as a revelation on Christmas morning, coffee mug warm in his hand as he watches his siblings open their Christmas gifts, laughing at certain ones and holding back his face from a smile breaking past his lips at others. He's third on the list to open his gifts, third son and all, and Tim finishes the last of his coffee, fingers reaching for his presents, all wrapped in a shade of red different from Jason's blood red. He thanks everyone for their gifts, raising a brow in amusement when he pulls out Damian's, a genuine smile breaking on his smile at Bruce's. Finally, he finds himself reaching for the gift you had gotten him, his fingers shaking as he breaks open the wrapping paper, smile on his face at the camera you got him. There's even an SD card and a battery charger part of the box you had prepped him.
"Oooh, Timmers is that from your girlfriend?"
"She's not my—"
The family breaks into teasing remarks as Tim groans, blush fresh on his skin, heart racing in his ears — that's when he realizes, the painful realization, a realization that breaks him into silence — he's in love with you.
Bruce has everyone move on as Steph sits down to open her gifts, and Tim's throat dries at the epiphany. He's in love with you — and that same lovesick smile breaks on his face as he wonders if you got his Christmas present. It was as if the two of you synced with the gift. Maybe he'd catch you taking photos of him with your camera. This time, he should stare back at you, flash you a smile, strike a pose, something, anything to fluster you. He was already looking forward to patrol that night. He picks up his mug, excusing himself quietly to get another cup of coffee, pulling his blanket with him as he clicks on his phone, placing his cup under the machine as he thanks you for the gift.
You respond immediately, video-calling him on accident, flustered state caught on camera, hair still a mess from waking up.
"I'm so sorry—"
Tim laughs. "It's fine. Are you home?"
"No. I slept over at a friend's place since my mom and I don't celebrate Christmas." You smile at him fondly. "I brought the gift you mailed to me, though. I haven't opened it yet."
"Let's say it's for your bird watching."
"You did not." You gasp, looking over your phone. "I'll have my friend record a video when we rip open our presents. Have fun on Christmas, Tim. Love you lots—"
Tim's face turns utterly red at the words, blinking wide-eyed at the now-ended call. You just... wow. He takes his mug of coffee, sitting back at his old seat where his siblings were, in a half-blissed-out state at your words. (He's told later on by your friend that you had sobbed into her chest when you realized you told him you loved him on accident.)
You text him sometime during the afternoon with the video of you opening your present, thanking him for his generous gift. You let him know that you'd send him your new photos with his present first, letting him see how good the quality of his camera could be. He texts you to sit on your dorm roof instead, and you ask if he was planning on kidnapping you. Maybe you'd let him take you for a swing. Instead, he tells you it's a present for your fanpage. You ask him if he's going to call Red Robin himself. He leaves you on read.
Bruce notices the way Tim's eerily giddy for a Christmas patrol, but he doesn't comment on it.
You exhale into the winter air, the cold piercing your lungs as you hold the camera between your gloved fingers, kicking your legs as you sit on the edge of the building, strap hung around your neck. You hum quietly as you watch the snow start, and a shadow looms over your shoulder.
"Hey." Tim smiles at you, Red Robin outfit on.
"Woah. He wasn't lying." You gasp. Your name spills past your lips, rambling about how you were his biggest fan. He stares at you through the whites of his domino mask, smile breaking onto his face.
"I've seen your Twitter."
"Yeah?" You exhale, eyes sparkling. "Honored. I hope you aren't going out of your way to visit me or anything. Gotham needs their vigilantes."
"And if I am?"
"Then you should go." Your cheeks flush from the winter warmth, and he steps close to you, forehead pressed to yours.
"You remember me from Halloween?"
"We have a thing with meeting on holidays, hm?" You laugh gently, eyes crinkling, Tim's expression softening.
"Yeah, we do." He hums, leaning in further. "May I?"
"Yeah." You exhale, lips finally pressed to his under the winter snow, his hands warm on your face as you lean in closer to him, chest pressed to his, lips parted to give him access to your mouth. Your head spins deliciously from the taste of his lips, his perfume reminding you of someone you know all too well, your mind muddled with the fact that you're actually making out with Red Robin, your celebrity crush. You whimper against his lips when he nips at your bottom one, his breath catching in his throat.
"Fuck, pretty girl. You can't just do that." He heaves, resting his forehead on yours again.
"Wow." You breathe, starstruck, eyes staring up at his.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." You laugh melodiously, and Tim feels his heart grow full. "Can I get a photo?"
"For you? Anything."
You make a Christmas post on your Twitter, photo of Red Robin with a Santa hat and white beard staying pinned for the Holiday season. (Tim wasn't allowed to live it down from his family, but he had gotten to kiss you stupid, so he was more than willing to take the jabs.)
He invites you to his place for New Year's Eve, invitation tumbling past his lips and nearly getting drowned out by his panicked rambling, cheeks red beyond repair and stutter catching in his throat, only for you to tell him that you'd "love to" and that you were "honored." You asked him if there was a dress code, and he told you it was fine. Even if the Wayne gala was that night, he would just sneak to his room when you arrived. He could finish socializing with the rich in a couple of minutes. Hell, he'd flirt his way out of it like Bruce did if it meant he could see you early. He tells you to arrive in a nice dress anyway, asking for your measurements so he could send you something. (You didn't want to give it to him, but he insisted.)
You pull up to the gala perfectly on time, ignoring the paparazzi asking you who invited you and making a beeline to who you assumed was Alfred and asking him if you could be taken to Tim's room. The gala wasn't somewhere you wanted to be, and Alfred had been more than welcoming, leading you and leaving you in Tim's room, telling you to make yourself comfortable since you were Tim's guest. You spent twenty minutes looking through his photobooks before he stumbled into his room, a little sweaty since he had been running.
"Hey." He smiles at you dorkily, smiling like a nerd in love.
"Wow. You're dressed nice." You mumble, staring him up and down.
"You don't look too bad yourself," He hums, locking his door behind himself. "Did you get to eat anything?"
"I ate before I came and made a beeline for Alfred when I came. Too many cameras."
"Sorry." He exhales. "Looking at my photos?"
"They're nice."
"They're from years ago." He hums. "Before my parents passed."
You mumble something under your breath, eyes meeting his in something akin to sadness.
"It's fine, now." Tim presses his thumb to the space between your brows, your expression relaxing immediately.
"Ah, right." You slip out the SD card from your purse, blinking at him. "You have a card reader?"
"Yeah." Tim sits in his chair, opening his laptop through some series of codes, holding his hand out for your SD card.
You drop it in his palm, his fingers drumming against the table as he opens the files.
"I got photos of Red Robin." You grin. "He was there on my dorm roof. Did you send him?"
"Yeah." He smiles. "Did you like the gift?"
"My Twitter loved it." You smile. You neglect to tell him that you had kissed Red Robin breathless. (Tim doesn't notice the way you get embarrassed, trying to fight off the red on his own cheeks when he remembers the way the two of you had made out on the roof.)
Tim pauses at the photo of him swinging away.
"Why didn't you post this one?"
"I was actually planning on posting it today." You hum. "The ones of him in action."
"You have multiple?"
You click into a folder, enter your password, showing him the photos.
"The camera's great, by the way. Red Robin may not have an ass as impressive as Nightwing, but he still has a nice ass." You laugh, clicking open the photos. Tim chokes on the air at the photos, and he laughs.
"Oh, yeah, Twitter would love this."
You shrug playfully. "What can I say? It pays."
Tim glances at the clock on the wall. Two minutes from midnight.
"How'd you spend the morning?"
"My friend came to pick me up so she could do my makeup." You laugh. "Then she brought me to the mall so we could get me some heels," You kick your legs to show him. "And then another friend, the one with a nice car, drove me here. My other friends insisted they watch me walk off to you. I forgot to tell them your last name after I asked for it, so they were quite surprised when they dropped me off her."
"Maybe I should thank your friends for helping you look so pretty."
"Yeah?" You smile, hopping to sit on his desk.
He stands up, pressing his forehead to yours, tucking your hair behind your ear, nose brushing yours.
"Yeah. What do they like?" Tim hums, your perfume flooding his senses again, his doing the same.
"Ever been told you share a perfume with Red Robin?" You whisper.
"No. You'd be the first."
"What's the brand?"
The brand falls onto silence as you press your lips to his, fireworks signaling the new year going off in the back. Tim's hands dig into your waist, eyes half-lidded, tongue pressing into yours with so much passion your knees might've gone weak had you not been already seated. Your hands find themselves tangled in his hair, pulling lightly when his hand finds itself on the zipper behind you. He pulls away for a moment, begging for your consent, asking if this was okay.
You had told him yes in a heartbeat.
Thus, Tim found himself enveloped with you, senses sent into overdrive, your skin pressed to his, sweat mixing with his, body tangled with his in his sheets — the same sheets he had thought about you so often in, the one where he had thought about you while he spilled into his hand, fingers pressed to your skin, mouth on your skin, sucking, biting, marking, doing whatever you would let him do to you. Your dress was long abandoned by his desk, his own suit leaving a trail toward the bed where he had you in his fingers.
He prayed this wouldn't be a foolish dream.
When he wakes in the morning, pulling you closer to his chest, your lashes fluttering against his skin, his heart warms. He should ask you to date him right now, he thinks. But his heart races in his chest, wondering if you would agree. Maybe the two of you had kissed in the heat of the moment, and you had let him have you because he had asked so nicely. He looks down at you as your eyes are completely open now, embarrassed smile on your face. He misses his chance.
"Good morning." He looks at you like you're his whole world.
"Good morning." You smile back at him like he's the universe.
The two of you fall back into the pace you had established the previous semester, this time without any classes together, only texting every now and then with updates. Tim hates this new life he lives. He misses seeing you during class and watching you play subway surfers on your phone or Bloons TD on your laptop. He opts for texting you during class instead, typing notes as he types responses to your messages. He wonders if you miss him the same way he misses you. He's too afraid to ask, still clinging onto the way your skin had felt on his during New Year's. It doesn't help that your department is halfway across the campus.
The next time he gets to see you, he's Red Robin, and he catches the familiar flash of your camera on the rooftop as he swerves into action. He finishes with the thugs easily, swinging back up to land next to you, your camera pressed to your chest, clicking capture as he raises a brow at you. You blink at him, smile on your lips. You don't look apologetic at all, almost cheekily. It was as if you knew he'd notice you.
"Hey."
"Hey." You beam at him. "Nice fight."
"Thank you. Care to tell me why you're out here during the February cold to get photos of me?"
"Because you're my favorite?" You blink at him, eyes wide.
"That's cute." He hums. "Shall I take you home?"
"Oh, if you could be so kind." You smile. "I had a friend drop me off nearby and I think he left already."
"Yeah?" Tim wraps an arm around your back, pressing you to him snugly, your arms wrapping around his neck. You close your eyes as the winter air hits your face, only for him to whisper into your ear. "Open your eyes."
Gotham looks breathless from wherever the hell Red Robin was in the air. Your breath catches in your throat, staring in awe as Tim swings from building to building, finally landing on the one where you dormed. You let go of him, cheeks warm from the air and the view, turning to look at him.
"Thank you. Thank you a lot." You smile at him, Tim mirroring your smile.
"Can I get a reward?" He had meant it as a joke, only for you to press your lips to his cheek, his eyes widening at the feeling.
"Is that good enough?"
"I was thinking something else, but that works too." He presses his lips to the corner of yours, smile on his face. "Stay safe."
"For you." You wave at him as he swings away from your building. You look through the photos you had gotten of him, going down the flight of stairs to the elevator. You had stuff to post for the rest of the month.
Tim finally bumps into you at the convenience store one fateful afternoon, reaching for your wrist before he could even register that he was scared you'd run off. He blinks at you as you blink back at him, tilting your head to offer him an awkward smile.
"Hey?"
"Hi. I'll pay, um, if you'll let me have a moment of your time."
"Yeah? Yeah." You nod dumbly. "That'd be fine. I don't have class right now."
"Yeah. I'll take your basket." He reaches for it naturally, swiping his card with ease. He hands you your stuff back, and you follow him, popping open your green tea.
"What'd you need me for?"
"Missed you."
"Yeah? I missed you too. It's weird not sharing a class anymore." You press the tea to your lips. "Missed me or the insanely good sex we had on New Year's—"
"You." Tim smiles. "Missed hearing your voice."
"Awh, what a cheeseball." You snicker, staring at the green start on the trees. "Cherry blossom season is approaching."
"Yeah. So are midterms." He shudders. "How's your classes?"
"You know, drowning in work in order to graduate early." You hum. "I'm writing something right now."
"For class?"
"Yeah. For fiction writing. The story has to be related to something you've experienced in college so far and I was wondering—" You inhale sharply through your teeth. "If I could write about us?"
"As your friend or as the guy you slept with on New Years?"
You open and close your mouth. "Both. Yeah. Both."
"May I read it after you finish?"
"I'll share the doc." You smile. "Thank you. I've been meaning to ask you."
"I'm honored that you'd write about me as a college experience."
"Yeah..." You trail off. "Oh, did you see my Twitter update? I got these super clear photos of Red Robin fighting thanks to the camera you gave me. Thank you, again."
"You're welcome." He hums. "Doing anything on Valentines?"
You puff out your cheeks. "Supposed to hang out with friends, but me and my other friend want to ditch so the two idiots would finally get to hang out without us third and fourth wheeling."
"So you're busy?"
"Not if you want to hang out." You tilt your head, capping your green tea.
"You'd do that for me?"
"Yeah." You hum. "But you'd have to make it worth ditching for."
"Oh, then leave everything to me." He hums, fingers brushing yours. "I'll pick you up around nine in the morning."
"And what time will you have me back?" You tease, pressing yourself closer to him.
"What time do you want to be back?"
"Whatever time you want." You hum. "Please pick me up in a nice car your dad owns. I want to see the interior of one of them."
"Sure." Tim hums. "Any other requests?"
"How should I dress?"
"Casual." He hums. "Do you want to match?"
"We can color coordinate." You gasp. "What color do you own the most of?"
"Red." He hums.
"Owh! We can match red." You grin.
Tim walks you back to your dorm, staring as you enter the elevator and disappear from view. He thinks a little about where he should bring you, lips pulling up lightly when he remembers something you had mentioned off-handedly in your interview with him. He knew now.
Tim shows up at your door with roses, your friends peering from behind the door as you take the flowers with him with a light flush on your cheek. You're dressed completely casual, red sweatpants matching his red hoodie, grey hoodie matching his sweats. You smile at him sweetly as you take the flowers from him, and your friends pull you aside, staring him down. One of your friends, bless her, tells him to treat you properly. She jabs a finger into his chest, going off about how she didn't care if he was some rich dude — the same rules applied, especially when it was your first relationship. Tim's eyes widen at the fact, your eyes darting to the side, a little embarrassed. Your other friends drag her off of him.
"Why didn't you tell me I'm your first?" He whispers.
You pout. "Didn't want to come off as inexperienced."
"That's not something to be embarrassed about." He hums.
"You would've treated me differently if you knew."
Tim sucks in a breath. "Yeah. I would've."
"Point proven." You hum. "Thank you for the flowers. They're very pretty."
He opens your door for you, waving bye to your friends. You sit there, staring at him as he stares at you.
"Where are we going?"
"Remembered how you joked about being taken on a first date to Costco?"
"No." Your jaw drops.
"I have a membership." He pulls the card from his wallet, and you gasp.
"You spoil me."
"Save that for when you're actually inside."
You fake a swoon, smiling at him sweetly, lips curled upward and brows relaxed. Tim hums, pulling on his own seatbelt, handing you the aux to the car, and you put the flowers onto the backseat. You plug your phone in as he starts driving, and you blink at all the buttons on the car.
"What are these for?"
"One of them's for missiles."
"What." Your jaw drops.
"I'm kidding." He laughs. "Most of them are for defense. Bruce's very into cars."
"I can tell." You mumble. "What are we getting at Costco?"
"Your green tea," He stops at the light. "And whatever else intruiges you."
"Can I get a Costco hotdog?"
"Yeah." He laughs. "You want a slice of pizza too?"
"Maybe." You scrunch your nose. "Moreso a hotdog."
"We can get whatever you want." Tim hums.
"Wow, if I didn't know better, I'd think you were trying to woo me." You laugh. (Tim hates the way he notices your eyes crinkle.)
"And if I am? It is Valentines."
"Woah." You mumble. "I didn't consider that."
"Yeah?" For someone so good at reading people, Tim sure struggled with reading you.
"I don't know." You frown. "Are you trying to swoon me? Or are you trying to get into my pants again?"
"Whichever one helps you sleep at night."
You laugh. "Using my own words?"
"You speak better than I do." He hums. "Do you want your hotdog first or later?"
"Later." You unlock your seatbelt, leaving the car. It looks awfully unassuming on the outside. Great for Gotham, you suppose.
"I'll push the cart." Tim holds his hand out for you and you take it, fingers wrapped in his. He lets go once he gets a cart, handing you his membership as you show the worker at the door. "Want a new iPad?"
"You know, I should make you buy Costco for me." You joke, patting his shoulder.
"Two hundred thirty two billion dollars? That's Bruce's money, not mine."
You snicker. "You have it memorized?"
"Stock trading for the company." He hums. "Stock is currently around five hundred dollars per stock."
"How the hell do you have time for schoolwork?"
"Coffee and an insane amount of self-discipline." He hums. "And revenge procrastination."
"At least you have some sort of weakness." You finally catch the drinks aisle, rushing in to find your green tea, Tim following behind you.
"I'll get it." He hums, reaching and pulling the green tea with ease, sliding it to the bottom of the cart. "Want anything else?"
"Can we browse?"
"Yeah."
You wander through the aisles, a comfortable silence washing over the two of you before you decide to speak up.
"Does Alfred need anything?"
"He's probably glad he has the house to himself for once." Tim hums. "Almost all of us are on a date."
You blink in surprise. "Even the youngest?"
"Except Damian." He hums. "Bruce is out too."
"Woah." You mumble. "The house must be quiet."
"Yeah." he hums.
"That did not answer my question." You pout.
"I texted. He sent a list." Tim mumbles, sharing the list. "You don't mind shopping for my family?"
"No." You smile. "I like grocery shopping with someone. It feels warm."
"Yeah? We're in the snacks aisle, so let's start there."
The two of you work your way through Costco, checking off Alfred's list of groceries, double-checking everything over when you finished. Tim grabs a rotisserie chicken for Alfred without it being on the list, and he grabs a tray of croissants, knowing Cass would probably want something sweet to snack on during the day. You text your friends to check if they want anything, and only one of them responds, telling you she's good. You have a feeling the other two are hooking up.
"Anything they want?"
"No." You smile.
"And you?"
"Just the green tea."
Tim raises a brow. "I'll feel bad if I only get stuff for my family while on a date with you."
"The tea is plenty." You beam. "I promise."
You help Tim unload the cart and then reload it, rocking on your feet as he swipes his card, not even checking the price twice, handing you the receipt as he pushes the cart out. The worker swipes the highlighter through the list, and Tim takes a right instead of a left.
"The car's—"
"Hotdog." He hums. "Can you get us two hotdogs? Card's in my wallet."
You take his card and get the hotdogs, tossing them into the cart as you hold the two paper cups.
"What do you want to drink?"
"What are you getting?"
"A little bit of everything."
"Then get me the same thing." He smiles.
You wonder if he's going to hate the flavor on his tongue. Though it's not your problem as you fill the cups, putting them in the holder as Tim pushes the cart back to his car, the two of you loading it into his trunk.
"We'll drop by my place first, and then we can drive to the next place I have planned." He takes the drink, straw in his lips. He blinks at the taste, eyes widening. "Wow. That's a flavor."
"Certainly is." You smile. "Like it?"
"Tastes like something Dick would have." He hums. "I'll push the cart. Get in the car."
You sit in the passenger's seat, opening your hot dog as Tim comes back.
"Ever had one before?" He opens his own, biting down.
"Yeah. My friends and I drop by pretty often." You hum. "Love the hotdogs."
"I should do that." He hums. "Alright. My house."
You chew on your hotdog as he heads toward his place, the music from your phone filling the car.
You wonder for a moment if Tim was actually into you. You have no doubt that you're important to him, but it was a little strange. You had slept with him before. What does that make you two? Friends with benefits? Friends who have slept together? Plain friends? A situationship? You chew on your bottom lip as he drives, mind elsewhere. Also, what were you with Red Robin? You can't call yourself a fan when you've had his tongue stuck down your throat before. There was too much to consider and ask. Maybe you should just ask Tim. (You don't, out of a fear of something. You're not too sure of what.)
When the two of you arrive, You help Tim sort the stuff into bags, carrying them to the front door as he unlocks it with ease, calling for Alfred and Damian to help with the groceries. Damian comes first, taking some of the bags from you, Alfred after him, showing you where the kitchen is.
"Thank you very much for running groceries for me, Master Tim." He nods. "You too, miss."
You smile. "No biggie. We were at Costco and I figured it'd be nice to do the groceries for you."
"It's very kind of you."
"Are you Drake's girlfriend?" Damian's next, eyeing you up and down, a scowl on his face.
"No?"
He frowns harder. "You deserve someone better."
"I really don't think—"
"Demon brat." Tim's voice comes out like a warning. "Don't tell my date to leave me."
"Is she not your girlfriend? I would have expected you to have already—"
"That's enough." Tim warns again, and Damian shuts up this time.
"Shall I prepare food for the two of you?"
"No need." Tim hums. "We have reservations."
"You made reservations? Do I need to change?" You follow after him, waving bye to Alfred and Damian.
"No. It's at the diner. It's Valentine's, which means there's twice as many couples there."
"Ohhh." You follow him into the car, sitting back down as he starts toward the diner again. "Is that all you had planned?"
"Also planned to take you home after this." He pauses. "My home. I was thinking we could use the movie room in the manor, granted none of my brothers get to it first. If that doesn't work, we can use the projector in my room."
"Are we gonna have sex?" You wiggle your brows playfully.
"If you want, I can have you screaming my name loud enough for Metropolis to hear."
You wince, looking to the side, embarrassed. "Holy shit."
"Expect the unexpected."
"I'm going to throw a milkshake at you for that."
"Cry about it."
The two of you get to the diner just in time for the reservation, your regular orders already memorized by the waiter. You're a little embarrassed, but you suppose it's not the worst thing ever. Tim finds the time asking if you enjoyed the day so far instead. You pull out your laptop as you wait for your order, continuing with the assignment due soon.
"Writing?"
"Yeah. Writing." You puff out your cheeks, fingers flying on the keyboard.
"What are you writing?"
You look up from your screen to stare at him. You don't say anything, but Tim gets the idea.
"Need a reference?"
"Actually," You lick your lips, scrolling up through the doc. "I'd like to meet Red Robin again."
"Your date's right here and you're talking about another man?"
"Writing fanfiction for him right now." You deadpan. "Need to know his kinks."
Tim coughs in embarrassment, forgetting how straightforward you could be.
"For a commission?"
"No. Out of curiosity." You pause. "I was curious to know what he would be into."
"Why not base him off of me?"
You raise a brow at Tim, swallowing thickly.
"Is this your way of telling me you don't want me writing fanfiction of other men?" You ask him one question, eyes asking another.
"Yeah." He smiles. "Yes to both questions."
You close your laptop when your milkshake and sandwich arrive, and Tim kicks you gently under the table.
"So what was the other question?" He raises a brow.
"I'll tell you in the car," You smile cheekily. Tim knows what the other question is. He just wanted to see if you were bold enough to ask him. The two of you continue with dinner, catching each other up with your friends' lives, smile on both of you's lips as the sun sets and the moon rises, Tim paying as he said he would. You take his hand into yours as the two of you walk to his car, and he opens the door for you, joining you on the other side.
"Before I ask," You lean over slightly, lips brushing his. "Can I have a kiss?"
"That's a question too, but I won't say no." He leans in for his lips to meet yours, hand moving to hold your face, tongue swiping on your bottom lip, darting into your mouth. You moan into the kiss as his other hand squeezes your waist, and you pull away from him suddenly, licking your lips for whatever taste of him was left. You grin at him cheekily, reaching to wipe the lipstick from around his lips, your voice lowering.
"The question I actually wanted to ask was if you were Red Robin." You grin, wiping the lipstick on a napkin leftover from Costco. "And I knew you'd read it off of me."
"How'd you guess?" He tilts his head at you, eyes still on your lips.
"First it was your perfume," You smile. "Then it was the way you kissed me." You pop the vanity mirror down, reaching into your hoodie for your lipstick. "Not to mention the way your forearms feel the same. Both of you have a specific way that you hold me when making out. I think that was the nail in the coffin."
You pucker your lips when you finish with the lipstick, tossing it back into your hoodie, closing the vanity mirror.
"So? Where are we headed now?"
"My place." He mumbles. "Have to have you."
"You could have me in the car."
"As much as I would like that," He exhales. "That would be very uncomfortable for you."
"Can I have you in the costume sometime later on?" You bat your lashes at him. "If you'd let me, of course."
"Yeah. Anything you want." His head thumps as he stops at the light.
There's a long, drawling silence before you speak up. You're scared, but you might as well ask.
"What are we, again?" You lean over slightly to stare at him. Tim notices you haven't put music on.
"If you'd let me," Tim licks his lips, "lovers."
"Then lovers we are."
The second time Tim gets to have you, he's so much gentler, fingers kneading the skin between them, curling them inside of you until you're a whimpering mess, worried that you'd wake someone in his family, his kisses assuring you that all of his brothers were out doing the same thing he was, wining and dining someone they loved, rooms also soundproof. Tim goes back to you after that, soaked fingers and sheets, licking your cum from his fingers, eyes locked with yours the entire time, pressing his lips to yours after he finishes. Your eyes roll back at how lewd he was being, but you suppose it's what the two of you deserve after flirting for so long.
Tim makes sure you're properly pampered in bed, your legs twitching after your third orgasm, begging for him to fuck you, tears in your eyes. How could he say no? Not when you looked so dazzling under him. He seems to understand something as he pushes into you this time, pausing to drink your form in, still as pretty as you had been before. This time, arguably prettier. You were so much prettier when you were crying about how you were his, cunt still oversensitive from your previous orgasms. Your face twists in pleasure, crying about how you were unable to take another release yet relenting as Tim drilled into you. You have no idea how he has the energy, and you're too tired to ask when he finishes.
You grimace as he peels you from the bed, setting you on the tile seat as he starts a shower for the two of you.
"I love you." You mumble. Not on accident or out of habit this time.
"How long?"
You exhale. "Don't remember."
"Approximation."
"Since I fell at your feet at orientation, maybe." You whisper into the mist as he helps you wash up.
"I love you too." Tim mumbles into your skin as he presses a kiss to where he had left hickeys.
"How long?" You repeat his question, staring at him as he stares down at you, moving the shower head to wash the bubbles from your skin.
"Since Christmas." He whispers back.
You smile at him.
"Since I told you I loved you on accident?"
"Yeah." He stops the water, wrapping you in a towel, drying you. You hum in satisfaction as he dries the two of you off, your fingers warm around his wrist when you grow tired.
"Can we sleep? I usually air dry my hair."
"Yeah." He presses a kiss to the crook of your neck, lifting you into his arms as he takes the two of you back to bed.
"What tag would you put on our story?"
"Idiots in love." You smile as you drift off, and Tim presses his lips to your forehead.
His tag would have been requited love.
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