#meaning baby’s first pattern test lol

[torque-witch]

Baby’s first bong

[sokkastyles]

I found a... really bad take about how "Azula can't have abused Zuko because abuse is such a vague term!" It's the reblog that's pretty bad lol.

I think you've linked me the original post with a different reblog before, and in general wingsfreedom is a person to be avoided. "When did Azula try to control Zuko?" Indeed. Not like "all your life you've used fear to control people" is a climactic line in Azula's story.

Anyway, the reblogger does two things typical of abuse apologists. The first is to confuse the meaning of words. The next is to try and claim that abuse is too "harsh" a word. Of course abusers don't want you to be able to name the abuse. Also notice the contradiction of the word being both too vague yet too strong to use. The purpose of this kind of argument is to deliberately confuse the meaning of words to silence any argument. That's why these people are so afraid of the word abuse. Calling this fictional character abusive is double plus ungood because I say so!

Anyway, abuse as a word is certainly not vague. There are a couple of casual meanings of the word, but that's not what we mean here. The way we're using the word here, and the most common meaning, actually has a very specific definition involving being cruel to, using, or causing someone harm by taking advantage of a power dynamic, and often in a repeated pattern. As OP themselves said, abuse is about control, and a major theme in Azula's narrative is her need for controlling the people around her in the way her father controlled her, and how that led to her ultimate downfall.

Abuse also usually has to do with interpersonal relationships or breach of social etiquette. Claiming that all the characters are abusive because they are fighting in a war is nonsense, because fighting in a war comes with an understood social contract that both sides will try to harm each other. Nobody has an unfair advantage over anyone else because you don't expect your opponent in battle to not fight you. Now, certain things like torturing POWs ARE breaches of that contract, and are considered abuse. But fighting on the battlefield is not.

What Azula does to Zuko is abuse because she uses her position both as his sister and as her father's favorite child to manipulate him with the intention of causing him harm, whereas Zuko feels an obligation to listen to her both because she is his sister and because he's been conditioned his whole life to see her as superior to him. She absolutely tries to control him, and is able to at various points. She almost gets him to walk into her trap in the first episode they share together.

Also, reducing Azula's relationship to Ty Lee as "being dismissive of her feelings twice in the beach" ignores pretty much every other interaction they have, but I'm not going to list them all. I will say, though, that this take is ignoring that Azula and Ty Lee's whol dynamic in the show is built on Azula threatening harm to Ty Lee for trying to live her own life away from Azula. Ty Lee cannot say no to Azula and lives with the very real threat of what will happen if she does.

With Mai it's more subtle, because Mai is smart enough to realize that she'll be subjected to the same thing Ty Lee was. She doesn't try to say no, but then Azula decides to test her loyalty anyway by refusing the trade for her baby brother. Mai's not visibly frightened but you don't have to be for something to be abusive. The absence of Mai's ability to say no is enough. And we see what happens when Mai finally does say no when Zuko's life is on the line. We also saw how Azula treated Mai when they were children, because she didn't like that Mai had an interest in Zuko instead of all the attention being on Azula. Mai and Ty Lee are not allowed to be full human beings around Azula with their own lives and ambitions. It is laughable that anyone would try to claim Azula cares about Ty Lee's trauma in particular when her response to it is a sarcastic "here we go." I don't think this, in particular, gets talked about enough, how Azula loves Ty Lee when she's fawning after her and Mai when her hatred validates Azula's own, but has total disdain for them when it's not about her.

And no, there is no definition of abuse that says abusers can't change. They certainly can. It's extremely difficult, especially when the abuser benefits from abusing people and sees no need to change, and that's why you see a lot of literature that talks about how victims should not try to change the abuser or assume that they will. Because protecting yourself is more important. That's why it's not a victim's responsibility to change their abuser, but nobody said abusers can't change. The reason why Azula can't change is because she does not care and will not admit that she hurt others. Someone like that won't change because they don't see a need to, but people like that also know that they can use your desire to see them change against you. Abusers often promise to change, and some even may have true intentions of doing so, but true change is hard. And if it is a victim's responsibility to change their abuser, it also still allows the abuser access and control to the victim, which is the thing they need to continue being abusive. We see Azula do this when she realizes she took her cruelty a step too far with Ty Lee, for example. An abuser giving a half-assed apology because they realize they might lose the fawning adoration they crave from their victims is nothing new. And it is deeply disturbing that these people seem to genuinely not recognize, or want other people to not recognize, these things for the red flags they are.

[piganatur]

THE EIGHTH SENSE EP 5

First things first, Aeri and Jihyun bepeu time cleared my skin and my soul. Them going shopping? Eating sweets surrounded by plants and sunlight? I was giggling like mad. Every time Jihyun finds something new to enjoy I’m the happiest person ever, his smile is a cure is2g.

The profound difference between them spending quality fun time together (but Aeri pls stop testing the boy and let him eat HIS CAKE) and the seniors who would rather stare at their phone/laptop than actually talk tho? Yoonwon sitting with her back to the boys while Jaewon is on his phone? Like we’ve seen him and Yoonwon spend time together and not just next to each other but throw in Taehyung and suddenly everyone finds the screen more thrilling than…each other lol. When Yoonwon inflated that palm tree I burst out laughing.

Park Taehyung....can we talk about the dude for a sec? He is such a confusing character, I can’t put my finger on his objective. He is bitching about any and everything like he feels inferior to all living organisms. Yoonwon constantly keeps Taehyung in check (Guys with low self-esteem always say women need to get drafted too), warns him about his bullshit and polices him, but then he genuinely makes her laugh? I’M so confused. He was exempt from the military, which btw isn’t so easy, like what’s up with that? Dropping a comment like that can’t be unintentional. I’m also curious about how is it possible that their trio all started uni in the same year and now they are about to finish together? Jaewon served in the army, but Taehyung didn’t. What did he do for two years? He’s the TA but… what else?  When they were talking about looking for a job I got the feeling Taehyung started to boast about Jaewon’s background, getting loud and riling him up, as if to divert the attention from himself. He appeared to be blank/dazed before opening his mouth to show off about Jaewon again. He’s visibly unsure at times (hesitates or stutters). His overt attraction towards Bitna also seems ridiculously naive. Getting his ass served to him was well deserved. Aeri and Jihyun obliterating him is pure gold, followed by Yoonwon’s praises (Wise girl...you guys are smart) What I’m trying to say is that Taehyung can’t not realise that others treat him that way based on how he treats them. So what’s his deal? Sure, he is that bastard of a ‘friend’ (and a catalyst to Jaewon finally flipping out, and rest assured, he will publicly flip out) but Taehyung has to have a bigger part in the narrative than that. He is present and shown in a lot of scenes to only serve that much and yet it’s still unclear to me what his full purpose could be.

*the shade they give without a single word spoken*

The dynamic between Jaewon/Jihyun is constantly shifting with every instance where they learn something new about each other. One moment they are soft idiots (affectionate) falling in love and in the next moment, Jihyun is the only thing that can ground Jaewon while he’s on his way to the abyss.  Jaewon letting out his inner baby girl to confess (accompanied by a giggle) that he never before called Jihyun? Priceless!! That is the thrill and joy Jihyun can evoke from him, making him act like nothing his friends (one real, one of questionable origin) knew him to be. Because with Jihyun, every little thing, every first has a profound meaning that Jaewon doesn’t want to waste, he wants to make them special.

It was so painful to see him fall apart in the bar, I literally felt pain in my chest seeing him like that, trying to drink his ass to the grave with that build-up in music and the traffic won’t stop for you poster in the background.

I want to talk about this scene a bit further. First, I thought that the traffic won’t stop for you poster was to show that there’s no stopping Jaewon tonight but then I noticed the wall behind Jaewon. It has a chequered pattern, these tidy squares, either dark or light and at one point he leans back to them. Jaewon is feeling like his self and life are opposite ends, are absolutes: he’s either what he shows to the world or what he hides from the world, either what’s expected of him hence what he has to do or what he wants to do... Staring at those squares with definite borders while my mind replays Jaewon telling Jihyun don't try to get out of the box (or frame)... I’m feeling totally normal and fine atm. Meanwhile, the traffic won’t stop for you can be linked to Jihyun and how, no matter the amount Jaewon tries to push him away, tries to make him pull away, it won’t stop him. Because if we look at them head-on, Jihyun is the one sitting in front of the traffic won’t stop for you poster and Jaewon is sitting in front of the chequered pattern. In the bar, Jaewon shut down to breathe, to cope. He tried to run away so much he flat out dismissed the idea of Jihyun being able to distinguish the real him vs. what he shows others vs. the mess he was heading to at that moment. But that can’t stop Jihyun. His angry shot remains mood. (I’ve probably rewatched that scene at least fifteen times by now.) It’s not that he’s angry at Jaewon, more like he’s angry that he’s unable to do anything to help. And yet... taking Jaewon home, looking out for him, talking with him, offering to be there whenever he is in need… Jihyun’s thoughtful actions, his presence, him caring about Jaewon eventually puts Jaewon at ease, because it’s sincere and can be felt.

Jaewon pulls Jihyun close bc he is, even at that moment, having a fckin hard time and the way Jihyun just stands there, letting Jaewon hold him because he knows that’s what Jaewon needs? Oh and the ‘you can’t kiss me today’ line... stating that he’s not going to be a drunken mistake Jaewon can try to brush off the next day? Affirming that whatever they are is past that, has been past that since the first time Jaewon kissed him not out of being drunk but out of the desire to do so? *fist in mouth* btw Oh Juntaek is insane! He acts with his eyes so well, conveying so much in his gaze I’m in awe (it’s his first gig y'all!!!!)

I don’t think ep6 is a dream sequence or a hallucination. For one, we can see Jaewon picking up Jihyun in ep5; he also wears the same sweatshirt he wore when waking up after getting sloshed the previous night. In addition, the therapy sessions are actually parts of one session all along. Jaewon and the therapist lady too, wear the same clothes throughout all the cuts we’ve seen so far. I didn’t see Jaewon wearing that outfit in any other scene so far (he wears something similar in ep5 but that feels off idk, it's just not the same?). This means we can’t pinpoint when that session happened, only that it had to happen after he became close to Jihyun. Thus, his ask for three weeks’ supply of meds can’t be an indicator. It’s unclear when that happened so it’s unclear how much of that supply of meds is still in Jaewon’s possession. I’ll talk about other signs that make me believe the trip to the beach is real in the next episode’s post

[lemonyko0]

Mr. Jeon: Deceit

jungkook continues to surprise you with his indifferent attitude, and yet, increasingly romantic and domestic actions. you continue to wonder what it means, if anything at all.

» genre: angst, fluff, smut

» description: (don't read if you don't want spoilers!) car sex, fingering (f receiving), head (m receiving), overstim, squirting. steamy!! lol

» word count: 3.6k

Part 5 | Masterpost

the more i learn about jungkook the more i feel like i understand him, less. it's like a game of clue, or mysterium, where i'm being given vague, off-topic anecdotes that i don’t yet have the information to fill in. like a constant plot-hole, i just simply don't understand him.

and yet i feel his switch to before he was is inevitable, and he’ll become more guarded and mean again. not that it would change anything i did, but i'm afraid that allowing my curiosity to get the best of me would result in him pushing me away.

“i like this you, much better.” i lay my head against his shoulder as he grades papers. the blinds are pulled, the door is closed and locked and all students are gone, and it's too late to where any teachers would care to hold a conversation with each other.

his hand doesn't stop writing as he hums, “what do you mean?”

i debate my options, and my curiosity gets the best of me. “you're not as guarded with me as you were at first. we can actually talk and enjoy each other’s presence.”

he stills, looking at me with the same unreadable dark orbs he always sports. i often find myself admiring the way he never shows his thoughts, his expressions stay the same. if no one can read them, they can never get the better of him. how doesn't he know i could never hurt him?

“sounds like you’re falling for me, baby.” he smiles the tiniest bit, picking the pen back up and moving into the next test.

“falling for you?” i mumble. “as in, like, a boyfriend?”

His tongue pokes the side of his cheek and he doesn’t look at me when he replies, “something like that, yes.”

i tick my head, “well, of course i am.” my reaction takes him by surprise, and i don’t know why. i mean, after everything we’ve done together, who wouldn’t be falling for him? he narrows his eyes at me before resuming his work. “are you falling for me?”

his chest breaks its pattern of rising and falling and his hand stops moving. he doesn’t reply to me. simply leaving my question hanging in the air like an invisible weight and i worry i’ve done something wrong, like staying past curfew, kissing a stranger, or stolen candy from a small child. something bad.

“all done.” he grunts, patting my thigh as i slide out of his lap and stand beside him. he collects his things and packs up for the weekend.

i stand there silently, still feeling the heavy air, as if i was treading on ice. jungkook had a way of making you feel like that sometimes, whether he knew it or not. he just seemed like the type of guy that had power. he oozed it. or perhaps that’s just how i saw him.

“let’s go.” he says, annoyed. i can’t tell if he’s annoyed from what i said, or just because i was standing around like an idiot and not paying attention.

i jog through the door he was holding open for me and the walk back to his car was silent. jungkook was the first to speak when he asked me where he was taking me. “home? bus stop?”

i shrug, “neither sound great, but home i guess.”

his eyes stay on me, the light keeps red for much longer than normal. “you can stay with me, if you want.” he speaks so quietly i almost don’t register it at all. my face turns to confusion before realizing he was actually inviting me to his house.

“oh-uh-of course!” i struggle to hide my excitement. “i-i mean, if you’d let me, i’d love to.”

he shakes his head, “i wouldn’t offer if i didn’t want you to.”

i nod, “y-yeah, of course, that makes sense.” my response makes him grin, one hand on the wheel and the other resting on the side console. “i’ve never been to a guy’s house before.” i quietly tell him, staring out the window, admiring all of the blurry lights, families having dinner, watching tv together, even the couples out, lining the main streets for a friday-night date-night. I specifically admire how unfamiliar all of it is to me, and how badly i want it.

“really?” he asks, “never a boyfriend, crush, fling?”

i shake my head with a pout, “no, never.”

i hear him hum, “well, i’m glad to be the first.” he places his hand on my thigh and begins caressing it slowly.

i practically melt at his touch. he sneaks glances at me as the ride goes on, traffic being a pain as always, and he’s focused, but losing patience. his hand moves further up my leg and into my skirt, drawing slow circles and massaging my leg, but he keeps his eyes on the road.

we hit the next stop light and he moves his hand over my front, a devilish smirk on his face as he begins to play with me. i let one hand grip onto his wrist and the other onto the side of the seat, no doubt digging my nails into both as he plays with my clit, teasing me and watching me squirm.

“you’re so fun to play with baby. always so easy.”

i hum, eyes closed and little whimpers escaping my mouth that he turns the radio down to hear, no doubt. he stops for a moment and i whine, “jungkook~”

his eyes are on the road, “hold on, be patient.”

a pout rests on my lips as i examine where we are, “are we almost there?”

he looks around before crossing the busy intersection, mumbling a “yeah.”

i nod and take in my surroundings, only a for a few seconds before he continues toying with me though my panties. “oh jungkook.”

his eyes scan over to me every so often, getting off at how easy i am to him, and admiring the way i am totally wrapped around his finger. or so, he tells me all the time. he moves his hands up and dips them into my panties, feeling my slit and only now can i feel how wet i am. “god baby,” he groans, “so fucking wet, bet you’d beg me to let you cum right now.”

i nod vigorously, “yes, yes, i would.”

he chuckles dipping a finger in and out of me, shallow, not enough. i squirm and whine, “please jungkook.”

he grins, “please what baby?”

i grip tighter on his wrist and look at him, “please play with me, need you bad.”

he pushes two fingers into my core and i don’t hold back my moans as he continues, curling them deliciously against my walls, hitting much farther in me than i could ever.

my cheeks heat and i feel my high nearing quickly. i whimper his name and he catches on, “go ahead, cum all over my fingers.”

as if i needed to be told, my orgasm hits me quickly and my entire body pulses and tenses. jungkook relents for a moment, puts the car in park with his other hand, his right arm still under my skirt, and he continues.

“i-i came, jungkook.” i tell him breathlessly, overwhelmed and confused.

he stares at me with a smirk, “i know baby.” i’m still confused as he adds a third finger, his palm rubs against my clit and i feel like my body is on fire, the only comprehensible thought i have is him and the overwhelming feeling between my legs. “oh, please jungkook,” i mewl, feeling his dark eyes on me.

“what is it baby?”

i open my mouth but no sound comes out, shaking my head as a last resort of communication. the hand that was once gripping the seat, now above my head and grabbing the head rest. i can hear his quiet groans and low chuckles as he watches the way my body warps and my noises increase.

i feel my second orgasm approaching much more intensely than the last, the feeling new and indescribable. and absolutely crushing. i came, loudly, and all over his hand, the seat, and my skirt.

i don’t notice initially, my vision blurry and ears deaf as my body slowly untenses. it isn’t until a few moments pass and he pulls his hand away slowly, that i feel a slight puddle.

“holy shit.”

“w-what happened.” my cheeks heat, embarrassed and upset at myself. i look down at my mess and back to him, eyes wide and almost, proud, with a slight grin on his face.

“i didn’t know you could do that baby.” he says, wiping his hand on his jacket and sliding it off, leaving him in only a white button-up.

i shake my head, “d-do what? i’m so sorry jungkook.” i feel like crying for making such a mess.

he chuckles, “baby, that was one of the hottest things i have ever seen.” i stare at him, upset, tears brimming and confused. he caresses my head, “you can squirt.”

i glance back down towards my legs, “is that what, this is?”

he nods, “yes, and its extremely hot.” i nod along, “it can happen sometimes when you’re really excited.”

I hum, “okay, so its not a bad thing?”

he shakes his head quickly, “no, no. nothing to be ashamed about.”

i settle, making sense of the scene that had just played out before me, and what to do now. jungkook, as always, is one step ahead of me as he steps out of the car and over to the passenger side. he opens the door, then bends down, “take your skirt off.” i look at him before pulling my skirt down to my ankles where he takes it from me. “panties too.” after stripping bare from the waist down, his last instructions confuse me. “now,” he points behind me, “get in the back.” i look at him lost, and he closes the door on me, then opens the door behind me. i stop questioning him and just do as i’m told, “put your skirt and panties in the seat you soaked. i’ll wash them later.” he tells me as soon as i’m in the back with him.

i set them in the front seat and look back at him, “why are we back here?”

he grins, scooting awfully close to me and gripping the back of my head, “you’re adorable.”

i smile dopily at him, and he rewards me with a kiss, and tongue. he kisses me deeply and fully, pulling me towards him, until i’m sitting on my legs beside him. he takes my hand and moves it onto his crotch, “touch me.” he tells me. i grab at him through his pants and he continues to kiss me, “more, y/n.” i try harder but it leaves him pulling away, “undo my belt, idiot.”

i blink rapidly, everything happening so fast i can hardly keep up. i look down to his pants to undo them, and he complains about how slow i am. once i finally figure it out he pulls his pants and underwear down to his thighs, “think you know what to do now, baby?”

i look at him, wide-eyed and as innocent as ever. “m-my mouth?”

he grins, “i’d be fucking you already if i though you could take it, but i don’t think you can.”

i nod and smile coyly at him, gripping his large cock in my small hand, “yeah, you’re right, still feel it.”

i lean down, giving his length small, kitten licks and he watches me with hooded eyes, his hand still at the back of my head, “yeah? pussy still pulsing for attention?”

i nod, maybe not entirely knowing what he was saying, but he was into it. he chuckles before inhaling sharply as i take his tip into my mouth, “maybe your little pussy could handle it then.” he says and i look up at him, popping off of his length and dragging my hand up and down it just as i’ve seen him do.

“you can. i’m all yours, do whatever you want to me, please.” he laughs at me, pushing my head back down onto him and i get the memo, opening my mouth back up and taking him whole.

he sucks in a breath and grits his teeth, “fuck, i really would baby.” he controls my head, rising and falling at whatever pace he sets for me, instructing me to breathe through my nose so i can stay longer. “i’d love to fuck you senseless, but i really want to cum all over your pretty face.”

i unknowingly moan at his words and he does too in response, chuckling as he kicks his head back, “fuck, you like that idea don’t you.”

i hum and incite a similar reaction, this time his hips rise off the seat, pushing himself further into my throat and causing it to close. i pull off for a moment but keep my hand on him, his hand on mine, controlling my movements as i collect myself. “you really are so easy, so eager for anything.”

i smile and look up at him, he groans at the sight, my lips and chin glossy, “just want to be with you jungkook, don’t care how.”

he opens his mouth to reply and i take his length back into my mouth, and he groans. “fuck, so i could stop you right now and you wouldn’t care?”

i move up to his tip and shake my head no, “still want you to cum all over my face, too.”

he laughs at this, and my heart flips that he actually found me amusing. “see? you’re filthy.”

i circle my tongue around his head and he grits his teeth together, breathing heavily, “you taught me. you made me.” i tell him, before going back down, a lot more determined than before.

“fuck,” he curses, hips jerking again, “i’m close baby.” i hum in acknowledgement and once again it plays in my favor. not much longer jungkook pulls me off of him, readjusting our position and telling me to stick my tongue out and close my pretty eyes.

i do as he says with no second thoughts. i almost wonder if there is anything i wouldn’t do, if he was the one asking.

he grunts and strokes himself to completion, managing to get most of it onto my tongue, but some still painting my rosy cheeks and face.

i hear him settle back in his seat and i open my eyes, swallowing and wiping the rest of it off with my finger, “here” he hands me his discarded overcoat and i take it from his hand. “wrap that around your bare ass before we get out so you’re not flashing my whole neighborhood.”

i look at the shirt then back down at him, “i-i’ll still be mostly bare-”

“okay?” he asks, chuckling and making himself decent before opening the car door. i keep myself glued to his back, the neighborhood is quiet, no one in sight, and its dark, thankfully.

he unlocks his front door and flips on a few lights. “this way.” he leads me around his cozy apartment, opens a closet to a washing machine and tells me to hand him my clothes. i unwrap his shirt from around my waist and hand it to him. he stares for a moment but throws it in with my missing clothes. he then begins to unbutton his top, discarding it and throwing it into the washer as well. he begins to undo his pants before looking at me, “you gonna stay in that?”

i stare back at him, wide-eyed, and frankly, in a trance. if there is one sight i’d like to have permanently etched into my eyelids, it would be jungkook, barely clothed. “d-do you want me to?”

he exhales, “i’ll give you something to wear, let me wash those.”

i nod, i strip fully, handing him my shirt and bra, and he throws his pants in there, leaving him in only his boxers, which leave little to the imagination.

he then walks towards a hallway and into a room, his room, i realize after i step inside. “you can take a bath if you want.” he tells me as he digs through his drawers, pulling out a new pair of underwear and sweatpants for himself and pointing at the en-suite bathroom.

if i’ve noticed anything so far in jungkook’s house, its the tidiness. people always complain that men are slobs, but jungkook is always well-taken care of. always smells so nice, when its not a nice cologne its his shampoo, body wash, or even just him. always well-groomed, never the same shirt two days in a row, and every outfit is well-put together.

i step into the bathroom and turn the lights on, looking around before spotting the shower. “there should be some towels in that closet, right?”

i turn my head to the stack of multi-colored towels in the small closet and nod at him, “yeah, this’ll do.”

he nods and dresses himself, i turn the water on and wait before stepping into it. i don’t care to shut the bathroom door, truly hadn’t thought about it until i was already in the shower, examining the things he had in there.

i use the body wash, shampoo, and conditioner he has in there, all very obviously well-loved, and he doesn’t seem to have much else. i suppose men don’t need much else.

i turn the water off and take a few moments to drip dry, ringing my hair out before pulling the curtains back to see jungkook in the bathroom with me. he turns, his eyes moving from me, to the towels, grabbing one and opening it up.

i gleefully let him wrap me in it. “thank you.” i tell him, smilingly widely at him. he doesn’t share half my excitement, and i use a lot of self-restraint not to attach myself to him like a koala to a tree and never let go. he does give me a boyish grin and pats my head, chuckling as he tells me, “you smell like a dude now.”

he turns back to the sink, doing whatever nighttime skincare routine he has. now thats the routine i need to pay attention to. i hesitantly wrap my arms around his thin waist, “no, i smell like you.”

to my surprise he chuckles, allowing me to stay where i was until he was finished. “Are you dry?”

i shrug, “kind of.”

he exits the bathroom, “finish drying off, i’ll look for something for you to wear.”

a few moments later he returns, a pair of shorts in his hands and a t-shirt. “this is the best i can do. the shorts might not work, but i surely won’t complain if you only wear the shirt.”

i laugh and he hands me the clothes, wondering back into his room. i examine the clothes, basic in nature, but they’re his. i put them on excitedly, it all fitting very loosely, the shorts tightened and tied as tight as i could get them, but i think they’ll work.

when i walk out of the bathroom jungkook is slouched against his bed, shirtless and in a pair of sweats, and i believe this has to be the best day of my life, i feel so much joy. he spots me and grins. “cute.” my cheeks heat and i rush to his side to kiss him on the cheek. “i get to stay the night, right?”

he nods, taking a bite of a cookie, offering me one from the same pack. “i’m not tired yet so i’m gonna watch a movie, you can go to sleep though, if you want.”

i shake my head and take it upon myself to cuddle into him. he doesn’t do anything in response, simply letting me wrap myself cozily around him. “what movie?”

“iron man.” he grins cheekily and takes a bite of another cookie.

“iron man?” he nods, as if it was a known thing. “why iron man?”

he shrugs, “its my favorite movie.”

i nod, resting my head against him before allowing a smile to grow. “I’ve never seen it.”

“really?” he says surprised, “oh you’ll love it, its amazing.”

and he was right, i did love the movie. but not as much as i enjoyed putting him to bed like a child because he fell asleep with the pack of cookies open on the bed, and one in his hand. i finish the cookie in his hand and close the pack before setting it on his bedside table. after that i found the remote, turned the tv off, and threw the covers over both of us.

it didn’t take long for him to hold me back in his sleep. while a part of me was sad he only did it in his sleep, i was mostly just happy to be in his arms, drowsy and content.

he let me into his house. let me use his shower, make me smell like him, let me hug him for as long as i could, gave me his clothes to wear, watched his favorite movie with me, and fell asleep beside me.

he may have ignored me earlier today, but now i have to know. i run my fingers through his hair as he lightly snores away, “are you sure you’re not falling for me too, jungkook?”

* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚* ੈ✩‧₊˚

wowa thank u for reading!! i feel like i haven't ever given thanks for the surprising amount of appreciation and attention this series has given me. so here i am, saying thank you all who have made it this far and have shown appreciation in many forms, be it liking, reblogging, commenting, sending in asks or even dming me, thank you a million times! and as always, wishing you all a fantastic day! - ara <3

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taglist: @marvelahsobx @jeonpendejo @notbotheredtho @fragmentof-indifference @jwnghyuns @heronstairsxd @carzjeon @jayunu @marcoswhore @isab3lita @shescharlie @kooookie @jeonzll @nickyisityou @karinahwang @laylasbunbunny @morganaah

[hee-blee-art]

I love your ocsssssss . Do you have any little tidbits about R60 as a character?

I Love other people's OCS ahh lol

tyvm! that really means a lot to me :')

also yes, more than happy to share more about r60!

r60 is a medic, but that's not what he was designed to be. he's the alpha model for a new line of androids corvus (a major robotics company) was developing as part of a secret military project. his first memories are of alpha-testing in their labs, much of it overseen by the head programmer on the project and a virtuoso of sorts, lyra. he wasn't functioning to their standards for the project, partially because lyra had made him too compassionate and not obedient enough, and he failed enough of his testing that they were going to scrap him and start over. lyra, having grown very attached to him and also having lots of complicated guilt about her role with corvus, broke a whole ton of rules to partially reset him with a medic program and remove a bunch of his inhibitors before setting him free and telling him to run from corvus and try to do good in the world. so he was very quickly thrust into the big wide world with only the objectives to help people and stay alive. since he was severed from corvus' networks, he did all his learning on his own, which was/is difficult and messy for him, and lead to him having some very particular patterns, preferences, and limitations. overall, he really just wants to help people and is happy when he's able to do so.

some other things about him:

- he's very fond of and fascinated by animals, and took up veterinary medicine as something akin to a "hobby"

- he is very anti-violence in general, influenced both by his medic programming to do no harm as well as his experiences, and is quite uncomfortable with weapons. even so, because of his original purpose, subprograms, and hard-wiring, he is capable of and skilled in combat, violence, and killing, which is a difficult thing for him to wrestle with

- he runs primarily on a self-rechargeable battery system that requires a "sleep mode," so he does sleep (related fun fact: that battery system was designed and made by an engineering team headed by none other than reid breaker)

- he is extremely fond of babies. he doesn't get to interact with children much in general but has helped with deliveries before and he was ecstatic, he loves hanging out with babies and kids

- his medic programming comes with a special "soothing voice" that involves frequencies that are meant to calm people down. it's not very sound science and is mostly sci-fi bullshit but I think it's a fun concept

- he has a complex relationship with another character called bloodhound, a bounty hunter android deployed by corvus to track and haul in r60, dead or alive. he is constantly on the run from her and doing what he can to impede her, but also doesn't want any harm to come to her, as he wouldn't want harm to come to any other person. he knows it just her programming, and he has what could be called a saviour complex when it comes to her

thanks again for asking about him! I love talking about my ocs :)

[nationalharryleague]

The Busy Bean

Pairing: Harry Styles x Reader

Genre: Coworkers to lovers AU

Word count: 5.6K

A/N: Hi all! This is my entry for Sadie’s (@meetmeinfleetwood) To Lovers Fic Challenge!! As always, many thanks to Mia (@hardcandy-harry) and Lu (@meetmymouth​ even tho shes taking a little break lol) for being wonderful betas!! I really love it and I hope you enjoy it too! You can find more of my writing in my masterlist and I would love to hear what you think (or anything else lol) in my ask! 

***

The first day at a new job is a universally terrifying experience.

You can’t sleep the night before, head full of nightmare scenarios of evil customers and mean bosses, and a swirl of anxiety continues to bubble in the pit of your stomach, refusing to slow or calm. There's a part of you that prays they will call and tell you that they don’t need your help anymore, despite how bad you need the money. But the call never comes, and the next day you stand in front of the building, desperately trying to take deep breaths and slow your heart rate, bracing yourself for whatever is to come whenever you enter.

This is where Y/N was today, in a mess of shaky palms with slight blue bags under her eyes from a lack of sleep that wouldn’t disappear no matter how hard her concealer tried. She stood in front of the large plate glass window of the cafe, sneaking glimpses and trying to prepare herself for whatever awaited before she actually reached to take the door handle. With a glance at her watch that signaled it was time for her to arrive, she took one last deep breath and entered the small but cozy space.

The cafe itself wasn’t open yet, devoid of customers with only a few lights behind the counter on, but it was full of the delightful and familiar smell of coffee that swirled around her head. The wall to her left was an exposed brick that had been painted white with a long table running along it with stools tucked underneath and a long cafe counter ran the length of the shop to her right. The far back wall of the shop was a giant book shelf with books stacked from the bottom of the top, arranged in a rainbow pattern along each shelf. The store was unbearably charming.

“Hello?” she felt herself call out softly into the empty space. Her voice came out slightly timid, her anxious mind not giving her lips full permission to speak.

She listened to a shuffling and a distant voice muttering “shit,” that seemed to be coming from a door that sat behind the counter where the few lights had been turned on. Before long, a man with curly hair popped his head out from the back hallway, giving her a wide dimpled smile. “Just give me a minute!” he said, holding up his pointer finger for a second, before disappearing back into the hall. After a few more moments of shuffling and muffled cursing, he reappeared. His face held the same dimpled grin as before.

“You must be Y/N,” he said, reaching out a hand for her to shake across the counter. “Boss man said you would be starting today.”

“That’s me,” she spoke gently, still apprehensive in the new surroundings. She placed her hand in his and he shook it with a friendliness she hadn’t expected from her first couple minutes in a new work space. His hand was warm and his nails were painted a bright and sunshiny yellow.

“I’m Harry. It’s great to meet you!” His voice was deep, but light and enthusiastic, far too excited for the early morning calm that she had been reveling in on her walk to the shop.

She decided quickly that he looked like a ‘Harry’ and that his name matched his cheerful disposition. His green eyes shined, even in the relatively dim early morning light that illuminated the room through the front window, and they held a disarming and calming quality that slowed her heart rate for the first time since she had woken up.

“You too.” She forced a smile onto her lips, hoping to conceal the first day jitters that ran through her system.

“Don’t worry about your first day,” he read her like a book. “Everyone here is very nice and you have the best trainer in the world.”

“I’m assuming that’s you?” she questioned, letting out a light chuckle.

“Well, of course it is.”

She was slightly taken aback by the peculiar, yet undeniably charming, man that stood across the counter from her. He was dressed in a loose fitting black sweater that looked cozy and soft, paired with wide-legged tan slacks, all covered with a dark green apron that had the cafe’s logo on the chest. The Busy Bean was embroidered in a light yellow sitting above a mug with a bumble bee on it; it was charming and cute, fitting in well with the plethora of plants and flowers that filled the cafe.

He must have noticed her staring at the logo. “You like the name?” he asked her, pointing at the logo that sat on his chest. She nodded softly, a smile finding its way on to her lips. “We’re going to be very busy beans in about,” he paused to check his watch, “thirty minutes when we open. So put this on,” he slid her very own apron across the counter, “and let's get ready.”

Harry wasn’t lying when he said they were going to be busy.

While the shop had intentionally started her on a Saturday morning when it was usually a bit slower, the morning rush came in and threw her for a tizzy. She took orders and ran them to tables for what seemed like hours, kept far away from the coffee bar as she was unsure of how to make all of the drinks yet. But thankfully, she wasn’t alone.

Soon after opening, another woman arrived, wearing the same dark green apron that matched Y/N and Harry’s. She had long dark hair that fell to the small of her back and in gentle waves and glowing mocha skin with golden eyes. She introduced herself as Isla, with a warm and friendly smile, and stationed herself behind the counter, making drink after drink that smelled intoxicatingly delicious. Y/N thanked god, or whatever was out there, that she and Harry had someone else to help them out while customers flowed in and out of the shop.

Harry hung by her side for the entirety of the morning rush, carefully watching her every move, and gently redirecting her when she seemed to make a mistake. He was kind and she could tell that he genuinely wanted her to learn, not just to do a job well for efficiency’s sake. There was never a trace of frustration on his features, just patience and good will.

Around noon, the flood of patrons looking for their morning coffee began to slow, finally giving Y/N an opportunity to rest. She flopped herself down on a stool that sat behind the counter and released a long sigh, stretching her neck and slumping her shoulders. She was met by sympathetic giggles coming from her two new co-workers.

“Honey,” Isla began with a hint of pity in her voice, “that was nothing.”

“What did I get myself into?” Y/N chuckled through a groan, putting her face in her hands out of exhaustion.

“I promise it gets easier,” Harry chimed in, always one to calm someone’s anxieties. “You just need to get into the swing of things.”

“What I need to do is learn how to make all the fancy coffees that people keep asking me for,” she said, peeking through her fingers at her still amused coworkers.

A look was passed between the two of them, Isla eventually moving out of the way and motioning for Harry to take over the coffee bar. “Come on Baby Barista, lets teach you some of the basics.”

His nickname for her made her release a loud laugh, immediately stifling it to a few giggles when she realized she had caused a few patrons to look up and over at her. Her cheeks warmed instantly, embarrassed for disturbing them, and she added another item to the list of things she was learning never to do again with customers in the store.

He guided her over to the counter full of machinery including pots of coffee, hot water, an espresso machine, and more equipment she couldn’t even identify. He spoke to her gently and gave her all his attention, carefully talking her through how to make a few of the most ordered drinks. Other than almost burning herself a couple times, she was starting to get the hang of it. She had a very hard time wiping the smile off of her face after Harry taste tested each one and gave his seal of approval.

“Not bad, Baby Barista,” he complimented with a dimpled smile and a slight nod after she handed him what she believed was a caramel latte. She reveled in his praise, wanting to do her job well, but also loving his approval and the nickname he had now assigned to her.

They did this coffee lesson for a few more hours, as the shop slowed to almost a complete stop as they got closer to closing time. Isla had headed home and there were only a few stragglers left that had spent their days working or reading in the cafe as the sun began to set around 5pm, with closing at 6. Harry diligently continued to teach her as much as he could in one day as they began to close up the shop and get ready for the next day. He was easy to talk to and their conversation seemed to flow effortlessly as they swept and did dishes.

“So, what brought you to London?” he asked after a short lul, looking at her with an inquisitive look, the ever present dimple on his cheek and grin on his lips disarming her easily.

“Oh, you know,” she stumbled over her words slightly, “I just needed a fresh start.”

“No mysterious or heartbreaking backstory I need to know about?” he quipped, a questioning eyebrow perched on his forehead. She let out another loud laugh, deciding not to quiet herself this time as there was only one customer left in the store.

“No,” she chuckled, shaking her head as she swept. “I got dumped in a small town and needed to get away from them. It was like they were around every corner.” She wasn’t sure why she was telling him this, but he just had a way of pulling the truth from her. “I always dreamed of living here and the breakup was the kick in the ass I needed to actually do it.”

“I’m glad you made it here, but I’m sorry about the breakup.”

“Don’t be,” she smiled. “Definitely for the best.”

“Okay, then I won’t be.” His eyes had a mischievous glint behind them, but she couldn’t exactly place what he was getting at.

They worked together in a comfortable silence after that, making sure everything was ready for the morning to come and clean from the day that was leaving. Y/N covered a yawn as Harry told her that she was done for the day.

As she clocked out and gathered her things, she heard Harry’s voice as she moved towards the exit. “Do you live close by? I can give you a ride if you need. Don’t want you having to walk too far in the dark.” His offer was sweet and made her smile.

“I’m pretty close and I like the walk.” She grabbed onto the handle of the front door but couldn’t make herself leave just yet. “Thank you for being so patient with me today, Harry,” she said looking back towards him and connecting their eyes. She tried to convey her emotions to him on her face, something she wasn’t always very good at.

“No problem. We’re happy to have you here, Baby Barista.”

With a final nod and a light flush to her cheeks, she set off down the street towards her new flat. It wasn’t a long walk, just long enough to get a little chill in her bones from the cold winter air and to turn her nose into a small icicle.

She reflected on her first day as she walked. She liked Isla, and really liked Harry. And while she was very busy, it was good busy, not the type of busy that depletes your energy and makes you want to fall over at the end of the day. It was a kind of busy that kept her on her toes, ready to learn, and develop a skill.

Her thoughts were broken through when she noticed the old beat up red car that seemed to be following her down the road. It drove slowly, as if it didn’t want it to see her, and took extra long at intersections like it was hoping to stay behind her. She took a turn she didn’t need to at the next block, and another after that, and when the car continued to follow, her heart began to race.

She thought about running, or going up to a pedestrian and asking for help; she even considered calling her mum just to stay on the phone with her until she got home. It wasn’t until she recognized the green eyes and dimples behind the wheel that her heart began to slow. She turned around fully then, making eye contact with the man who had been following her, and crossing her arms in front of her and shooting a questioning eyebrow up at him.

He wore a look of shame as his car slowed to a stop in the street next to her.

“Excuse me sir,” she said sarcastically, bending over to look in the window and get a better look at his embarrassed rosey cheeks. “Why were you following me?”

“I wasn’t being a creep, I promise,” he quickly defended. “This neighborhood gets a little dangerous at night and I just wanted to make sure you got home safe.” He looked panicked and frazzled, clearly not planning on being caught. It was the first time she had seen him without a smile on his face all day.

“Harry, you were the thing that was making me feel unsafe,” she said, playfully scolding him through giggles. She watched as his face fell in a flood of relief that she wasn’t angry with him. “If you told me that you were going to follow me home anyway, I would have taken the ride.”

“I’m sorry.” He hung his head and ran a stressed hand through his curls.

“It’s okay, Harry,” she smiled softly. “I appreciate you caring enough to make sure I got home.” She rested a hand on the passenger side door handle. “And now you’re going to drive me the rest of the way home to make up for making me get off my normal route,” she laughed as she pulled on the handle and settled herself into the passenger seat.

The car was old, but clean and it smelled like the cologne he wore that she had picked up on a few times throughout the day. He was quiet, hanging his head like a child who had been caught with his hands in the cookie jar, as she directed him towards her flat. “I’m sorry, again,” was all he said when he pulled up in front of the building.

“Don’t be,” she smirked, using the same words she had earlier in the day when discussing her breakup. She exited the car, giving him a wave, and a call of “I’ll see you tomorrow,” before entering the building and shutting the door behind her.

***

Over the next few weeks, Harry and Y/N became fast friends.

After about a week of begging, she finally broke down and allowed him to pick her up and drive her home from work every day. Their morning rides consisted of the perpetually peppy and excitable morning person in the driver's seat blabbering on about something he saw on the news while he was getting ready or going on about a new book he was reading, while she would settle her still sleepy head on the window and rest her eyes for just a few more minutes before their day was forced to begin. At the end of the day, Harry was the quiet one, letting her recount the day (usually complaining about unruly customers or people that would sit and steal their wifi all day without ordering anything), while he drove her at a painfully slow pace to her flat. He always waited until she got inside the building, even asking her to text him when she got inside her tiny flat.

“I just want to make sure you got inside safe,” he would argue when she teased him about it.

“I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself,” she would rebut.

“Then I’m not coming to help you anymore when you can’t figure out the milk steamer, Baby Barista.”

“Don’t threaten me with that stupid milk steamer. It has so many buttons you need to work for NASA to understand it,” she would groan, only to be met with a teasing glare from the curly man next to her. “Fine, I take it back,” she would always concede.

His protectiveness was not unwelcome to her. If she was being honest with herself, Harry was the only real friend she had made since she made the move to London and she was quickly becoming heart crushingly lonely. She took any care that anyone in the new and scary city was willing to give her with open arms.  

He was her only friend. They got on so well, she couldn’t deny that she enjoyed the extra few minutes she spent with him every morning and evening in the car. Maybe even a little too much.

At work, there was usually a chorus of laughter and giggles coming from their direction as Harry had taken her under his wing while she learned the ropes. There were days they would stay late after they had been off the clock making drinks over and over again; him patiently teaching, and her desperately trying to learn. There were definitely a few failures along the way, but they were always met with a teasing joke and then careful step-by-step directions on how she could fix it.

Technically Harry was her boss, store manager to be specific, but they worked alongside each other seamlessly, him never barking orders at her or using a harsh or authoritative tone.

Until today.

Y/N had been talking to one of their regulars, Robby, after she delivered an Americano to his table in the corner while it was particularly slow. Robby came in often, always shooting Y/N a bright smile and peppering compliments into their quick conversations. He was gorgeous, she couldn’t deny that; he had deep brown skin and an athletic build that she was sure was muscular under the thick sweater he was wearing to protect him from the cold. But he wasn’t her type, a little too arrogant and self-obsessed for her liking, always figuring out a way to turn their quick conversations back to himself. While it was fun to flirt with him, she knew it would never go any further than that.

“When do you get off?” Robby had asked suddenly, derailing their conversation away from the drink she had just delivered him. “I would love to take you out and see you in something other than that god awful apron.”

“Hey! I quite like my apron,” she playfully feigned offense, reaching to lightly swat him on the arm. “And while I appreciate your offer, I just got out of something pretty long term and I’m really not looking for anything right now. I’m sorry, Robby.” She forced a friendly pout onto her face, pretending like she was actually sorry for denying him.

Before he could respond, she heard an annoyed voice call her name from behind the counter. Whipping her head around to see who it was, she found Harry wearing an annoyed and frustrated face she had never seen him make before, especially not directed towards her. “We need some help back here. You have a job to do, remember?” he scolded, eyebrows furrowed and jaw steeled.

Her cheeks flushed white hot, embarrassed to be reprimanded like that in front of the whole shop. She hung her head in shame as she quickly walked back behind the counter. She was beyond embarrassed, suddenly uncomfortable in a place she had finally begun to come into her own in. She was learning and doing a good job, at least that was what she had been told, by both Isla and Harry; but the uneasy feeling in her stomach kept her from feeling comfortable for the rest of the day.

She carefully and quietly navigated behind the counter for the rest of her shift, sheepishly doing her best to stay out of her coworkers’ way and just do her job.

For the first time, she was slapped in the face with the reality that Harry wasn’t just her friend; he was her boss. He had an authority over her, and could probably get her in trouble with the owner, or even fired if he really wanted to. Navigating a business-like relationship was awkward and abnormal for them both, but Y/N decided she needed to learn how to quickly.

There was another reason his silent treatment seemed to hurt, one that Y/N had been trying her best to ignore. An undeniable crush had begun to build in her for the bright and bubbly man, despite however hard she had tried to fight it.

Harry made her feel safe, always keeping an eye out for her and trying to make sure she was alright. He made her laugh more than anyone she had ever known and their chemistry together felt electric. But what warmed her heart, and what now hurt the most, was that it felt like he cared about her just as much as she cared for him.

But now, it all felt like a fairytale she had built up in her head.

Their usual banter and giggles fell quiet for the rest of their day, reducing to curt directions from Harry and understanding hums from Y/N, following his orders without question or comment. Even Isla was quiet, not daring to breach the tension the pair had created between themselves.

The car ride home was quiet and strained that day.

But she still texted him when she was safe inside her flat.

***

While she had prayed that the next day would be like any other, their morning ride to work was filled with much of the same silence.

Harry fiddled with the heat and the radio in an effort to avoid her eyes or having to make conversation, eventually settling on a station that was playing old classic rock she didn’t recognize. He drove like she wasn’t even in the car, staring silently ahead at the road. She sat stiffly in the passenger seat fiddling with her fingers, not daring to get comfortable in a space that was all his.  

At work, they both held tight to the tension, only muttering at each other when absolutely necessary. She kept her head down and just did what she was told to do.

She was at the counter when a woman approached the coffee bar, seeming to bark her order for an extra hot cappuccino with extra foam at Y/N. Her face was twisted into an angry pout, like she had just smelled something bad, and spat her words out her words. Y/N just nodded and breathed a “yes, maam,” unable to fight with any nasty customers today while her head was so occupied with Harry. She was off her game.

The woman hovered at the counter, watching intensely and tapping her foot impatiently as Y/N fought with the dreaded milk steamer attachment to one of their large industrial machines. She would have sworn that she pressed the extra hot setting.

Passing the full mug to the woman at the register, Y/N watched as she took a long sip of the drink before paying, something that wasn’t really allowed, but Y/N just didn’t have the fight in her today to reprimand her.

“That will be £2,” Y/N spoke softly with as much sweetness as she could muster, afraid of what could come out of the woman’s mouth. She watched as her face turned even more sour than before after she finished the long drag from the cup.

“I’m not paying for this,” she declared, nose stuck high in the air.

“I’m sorry?” Y/N asked with confusion clear in her voice. “Is there something wrong with it?”

“It’s not extra hot and there is no extra foam.”

“Okay, I’m very sorry about that,” she said apologetically, even though she knew for a fact the drink had both of those things, and released an exhausted sigh. “I will make you another.”

The woman’s eyes flicked down the counter in Harry’s direction, rudely snapping her fingers at him to catch his attention. He was hunched over the back counter, somehow worsening his already terrible posture, trying to eat a sandwich as fast as he could before his break was over. “Are you her boss?” she shouted at him, even though he could have heard her without raising her voice at him.

Y/N’s eyes were already filled with anxiety when Harry connected his with her’s, seeming to wordlessly ask what was going on and Isla watched on in terror. She felt her body try to shrink away from the woman before her and Harry as he came closer.

“I’m the store manager. Is there something going on that I could help with?” His eyes kept flashing back and forth between Y/N and the woman, trying to decipher the situation without words.

“I want you to remake my drink.”

“I’m actually on a break-”

“No,” she cut him off mid-sentence. “If she makes my drink again, she is just going to fuck it up all over again. She’s obviously incompetent.”

Y/N eyes flew open at her words, a mix of shock and hurt running through her. With her heart beginning to race, never one for confrontation, she wanted to melt into the floor and disappear all together.

Harry’s face hardened at the woman as she hurled insults towards Y/N. Stepping in front of her, as if putting his body between her and the woman could protect her from her harsh words, he took a deep breath before he began to speak again. “First of all, you will not speak to anyone who works here like that,” he defended her. “Second, I’m sure she’s completely capable of making your drink again if you give her a moment.”

“I don’t want her to make it and I have places to be,” she continued to fight. “I don’t have time for some pathetic newbie to give it another try.”

Her comments hit Y/N hard in her existing feelings of inadequacy and before she knew it, her vision was beginning to blur. She felt like this woman was repeatedly kicking her while she was already down.

“You have to leave.”

Harry’s voice was angry. It wasn’t the frustration or annoyance she had heard the day before, and it was a far departure from the kind and patient tone she had grown to love since she began working at the shop. It was full of anger, something she had never heard from him and an emotion she hadn’t even been sure he could feel before this point.

“I’m not leaving until I get another drink that’s correct and free.”

“I will call the cops if you don’t leave right now.”

Y/N couldn’t stand to watch this unfold before her any longer. An anxious weight had settled on her chest and she had felt the tears begin to roll. She was gone from the counter, running towards the soundproof walk-in fridge in the back hall. She planned on shutting herself inside and sobbing until she froze.

She stood in the freezing chill, holding her arms tight to her frame, desperate to keep herself warm and shield herself from the wrath that was playing out in the cafe. The cold seemed to ground her and the distance she had put between herself and the woman eased her stress, but the tears continued to flow as her eyes ran over the stock of the fridge in an attempt to distract herself.

A knock came from outside the heavy metal door that startled her, a soft and patient voice that she knew so well called through. “Y/N, are you okay? Can I come in?”

After doing her best to wipe the tears off her raw and cold cheeks, she choked out a small “yes.”

The door carefully opened and she was met with a soft and empathetic gaze from the only person she wanted to comfort her. He breathed a soft “come here,” before he opened his arms wide. She bolted into them, letting his giant frame envelop her whole in the warmth that always radiated from him. Y/N let herself weep softly into his chest as the dizzying scent of his cologne took over her senses.

He held her close to him for a few moments, letting her get all her emotions out, before releasing her body and taking her face into his somehow still warm hands, using his thumbs to swipe away a few more tears that had managed to escape.

“I don’t think that I even messed her drink up,”she broke the silence, feeling pathetic as he held her in his hands.

“I know you didn’t. She won’t be coming back.”

“Thank you for defending me,” she said, hiccuping as she stared into his comforting eyes. “I feel so stupid. I’m sorry.” She went to pull away, but he continued to hold her close.

“No, this is all my fault,” he shook his head slightly, eyebrows drawn together in concern. “If I hadn’t been such a dick yesterday then none of this would have happened. I’m so sorry.” His eyes held honesty, determined to be granted absolution by the girl before him.

“I don’t like it when we don’t get along,” she squeaked. “I really don’t like it when you yell at me and make me feel like I’m not doing my job well.”

He sighed hard, his face looking like his brain was going a mile a minute. “I have to be honest with you,” he confessed. “I wasn’t acting like an asshole yesterday because you weren't doing your job; you were just doing fine. I was upset you were flirting with that guy.”

She felt her lips fall into a small ‘oh.’ While she hadn’t meant anything by what she thought was harmless flirting, Harry hadn’t known that. The frustration and annoyance she had heard was in actuality all jealousy.

“You were jealous?” she asked softly, bringing a hand up to hold over one of his own that were still holding her face.

“Well, yeah,” he said with an awkward shrug. “I just thought that there might be something between us.”

He looked so adorable like this, slightly uncomfortable and shy. She looked at him intensely as an excited bubble began to form in her stomach at the idea that this massive crush had been mutual the whole time.

“There is.”

She couldn’t hold back her smile any longer, a grin breaking out onto her face as she nodded at him. The cold of the fridge was no longer nipping at her skin, her whole body radiating a flattered and excited blush of heat. The screaming she had just endured felt long behind her although it had only been a few minutes.

He mirrored her giddy expression. She watched as all the tension in his face began to melt away in relief and it reminded her of the look on his face when she teased him after he followed her home that first day.

“Oh, thank god,” he breathed. “I was so worried that you were going to friendzone me forever.”

“I thought you were going to employee-zone me,” she chuckled.

“Are you going to kiss me or keep staring?”

A wide cheeky smile stretched across his lips, before she reached up and connected hers to his. The kiss was caring and sweet, but it felt like it sealed something she had been feeling since the first day they had met.

Their lips moved smoothly against each other, interrupted occasionally by a smile one of them couldn’t contain or a giggle that slipped from one of their mouths. She wasn’t nervous or overwhelmed by his proximity. She was so comfortable in his embrace. He was her best friend, after all.

They broke apart after a few moments, giant grins plastered on their faces that neither of them could manage to wipe away. “I liked that a lot,” Harry beamed, a boyish flush to his cheeks.

“Me too,” she mirrored him.

They spent a few more minutes in the fridge, swirling in a daze of infatuation and affection. “Do you think anyone heard us?” he asked softly, looking over towards the large metal door that had been left open a crack, before it flung open and they were met with a thrilled Isla.

“Yes, I heard you!” she exclaimed. “It’s about time!”

Thank you so much for reading! Feedback/Reblogs mean the world!! 

[deluweil]

Re-watching 4x05, there were some things said in Maddie’s and Buck’s conversation in the beginning and then when kid Buck falls off the bike (by Margaret) that made me go and look for the risks in donating bone marrow.

Remember that Daniel died the first year after Buck was born, meaning that Evan was a baby when they used him as a donor.

So I pulled a Buck and went to research online: (According to healthline.com)

Anyone between 18 and 60 years old can register to be a donor.

People between 18 and 44 tend to produce more and higher quality cells than older individuals. Doctors choose donors in the 18 to 44 age group more than 95 percent of the time, according to Be The Match, a national marrow donor program.

You’ll need to provide a tissue sample. This is obtained by swabbing the inside of your cheek. You must also sign a consent form.

Besides donating your bone marrow, you’re donating your time. To be accepted, you’ll need to provide additional blood tests and have a physical examination. The total time commitment for the donation process is estimated to be 20 to 30 hours over four to six weeks

The most serious risks have to do with anesthesia:

People who fall into those categories may have an increased risk for:

postoperative confusion

pneumonia

stroke

heart attack

About 2.4 percent of donors have a serious complication from anesthesia or damage to bone, nerve, or muscle, according to Be The Match.

You’ll only lose a small amount of bone marrow, so it won’t weaken your own immune system. Your body will replace it within six weeks. - But this talks about adults doing the process, not a newborn, barely formed baby.

Some potential side effects from general anesthesia are:

sore throat due to the breathing tube

mild nausea

vomiting

Regional anesthesia can cause headache and a temporary drop in blood pressure.

Some side effects of marrow donation include:

bruising at the incision site

soreness and stiffness where the marrow was harvested

achiness or pain in the hip or back

trouble walking for a few days due to pain or stiffness

You might also feel fatigued for a few weeks. That should resolve as your body replaces the marrow.

While recovering, here are a few ways to ease common side effects:

Lightheadedness. Rise from a lying down or seated position slowly. Take things easy for a while.

Sleep disturbances. Eat smaller, lighter meals. Rest and go to bed earlier until you feel fully recovered.

Swelling at the surgery site. Avoid heavy lifting and strenuous activity for 7 to 10 days.

Swelling of the lower back. Use an ice pack periodically throughout the day.

Stiffness. Stretch or take a few short walks each day until you build up your strength and flexibility.

Fatigue. Rest assured that it’s temporary. Get plenty of rest until you feel like yourself again.

According to Be The Match, some donors find it more painful than they thought it would be. But others find it less painful than they expected.

Reading this got me even more mad at the Buckley parents, because baby Evan was expandable, they had him for the sole purpose of saving Daniel. It made me wonder if the graft worked but the baby died in the process if the grieving would have been as long as it is with Daniel.

I wonder if both survived, the treatment of baby to adult Evan would have been different - if he would have been considered the hero/savior by his parents.

I don’t wonder at Buck’s unbelievable tolerance for pain, and his habit to persevere despite everything. 

I don’t wonder about Buck’s belief of how expandable he is (obviously he’s not), it’s because that’s how his parents made him feel, every day of his life for as long as he lived under their roof, and even outside of it. 

Until the 118, bobby, and the Diazes, he really didn’t have a home.

And Chimney’s “Yes you were, by her.” (referring to Maddie wanting and loving him) does not makes a difference, because, yes she loves him and of course she wants him, always, but a sister’s love (even absent, for whatever reason) amazing as it is ( I have two, both younger) does not rival to the patterns of behavior and sense of self worth our parents can instill in us. 

I know my parents love me, but they screwed me over pretty good. (My therapist is making good money off of me lol) I know my sisters love me and that they are always there when I need them, and vice versa, but that doesn’t make the damage our parents did, even inadvertently, any less harmful.

So Eddie’s very correct assumption (unlike the rest’s broken record - reckless) in Buck acting expandable is such an important observation that was finally made to Buck himself - and the fact that it was made by Eddie is even more important, because Eddie is the one that spend the most time with Buck, by choice, and actually sees him for who and what he really is. 

Eddie doesn’t shy away from that conversation - and compared to Eddie of S3 and even S2 that is a hell of a character development, and a blessing in disguise because now they can both move on together. - Get better together.

I didn’t plan on making this about buddie - but the family Buck chose, choosing him back, in contrast to the family who brought him into this world out of necessity not out of choice is so highlighted in this case, it had to be adressed.

[redsbrainrot]

Gruvia Week - Discovery

This is my first time positing on here lol - go easy on me please

Warning: minor smutty themes

_ _ _

"Juvia, you feeling alright?" 

Juvia, sat on a bench in the guildhall next to Levy and Gajeel, continued to rock back and forth in her seat with her arms clenched around her stomach. In Levy's lap was placed one of the twins in her hold, giddy and babbling while the one Gajeel was cradled into his shoulder and fast asleep. Therefore their conversation had to remain quiet or the six month old baby would awake screaming. 

"Juvia's okay," She mumbles, "I think I just ate something weird." 

Levy and Gajeel glance at each other, "Do you feel sick?" Levy asks. 

She nods, "A little." 

"Weren't you feeling crappy yesterday?" Gajeel adds. 

"A bit." Juvia would bend her truths to save her friends from worrying too much. 

For the past four days, Juvia had been experiencing mild nausea. Every day it appeared to be more frequent, this day being the worse. 

"Come on," Levy stands up and carefully hands over the twin she had to Gajeel, "I'll take you home."

Levy walks Juvia down the sunsetting street to the apartment Juvia shared with her boyfriend, who was currently out on a long lasting job, leaving Juvia with a feeling of absence in her apartment, and peacefully waiting for him to return in a months time. 

Juvia frantically gets out her keys to unlock the door, a sensation of rush bursting through her veins. As soon as she enters, her direction is in a locked path directly towards the sink as it was the closest thing for her to unleash half digested food from her stomach. 

Levy quickly grabs a chunk of Juvia's wavy blue locks to save them from being stuck together by portions of puke while her hand eases her by rubbing circular patterns on Juvia's back. After Juvia retracts her position from over the sink, she sinks to the ground, exhausted and somewhat hungry again. 

"Juvia, how long have you been feeling like this?" Levy questions, dropping next to her. 

"A few days." 

"Are you sure it's something you ate?" 

Juvia's eyes widen a little, peering up towards Levy's face. She hadn't exactly thought what it could be. Truthfully, she was denying what it most definitely was. Juvia's an intelligent woman, and can tell the difference between an illness and... the other topic. 

Juvia begins to twiddle her thumbs in nervousness as her nose buries into the skirt of her dress on top of her knees, "Juvia's not exactly sure..." She confesses. 

Levy's next query would for sure strike something, "Is your period late?"

That one didn't actually enter Juvia's mind. She mutters a sequence of dates and numbers to herself, counting on her fingers in concentration. "Shit!" Juvia cursed on rare occasions. 

"Is that a yes?" 

Eyes wider than ever, she nods. "Two weeks late!" 

Levy knew all these symptoms. Juvia had been oversleeping and coming to the guild at later times in the day, the nausea, the missed periods... It wasn't hard to calculate. She pushes herself from the floor and taking Juvia's hand with her, taking her towards the bedroom and implying her to sit on the bed, as this will be pretty heart stopping. 

She takes her hands into hold, and kneeling in front of the puzzled blunette, her voice gentle and calm, in attempt to keep things light hearted, "Juvia, I think you're pregnant." 

Her eyes slant to the side, taking in the life changing information that may be a high possibility. "No..." She says under her breath, "Gray-sama and Juvia aren't even married yet... not even engaged." Juvia likes to keep traditions in mind.

"Doesn't mean it's not a possibility. All the evidence is right in front of you, you can't possibly deny it. Plus you've always dreamed of having kids with Gray. This can be a good thing if you want it to be. If not, that's totally fine too." 

Juvia and Gray hadn't discussed kids more than once. At least alone together and not in a teasing situation surrounded by their guild-mates. 

"Have you got any pregnancy tests here?" 

Juvia shakes her head in reply. 

"I'll go out and get you one." She breaks the contact, exchanging a smile with her as she heads out the door. 

Juvia falls into her bed, glaring at the ceiling as she processes the situation. The chances of it being true were actually quite high. The two of them were very sexually active, yet also taking precautions. Most of the time. Once or twice, Gray may have relied on the withdrawal method. A few weeks before Gray left for his job along with Natsu, Lucy and Erza, the two of them went out to stargaze. Mere touches were grazed on each others skin. Those touches becoming more lewd, lewd gestures forming into kisses, and eventually, the kisses leading to sex under the midnight sky. 

Juvia's hands slap to her face in utter embarrassment, and stupidity flowing through her mind. No contraception which was one hundred percent effective existed, and they increased the chances of conceiving by using the worst method possible. 

Juvia unconditionally loves her Gray-sama, and even though it took some time, the feeling was completely mutual. However, Juvia had planned out her life with Gray. First moving in together, which had already been achieved. Second, waiting for the day he proposes (she doesn't have the guts to do it herself). Third, the day the two lovebirds finally get married. Last but not least, babies. 

Juvia had strong mother instincts, she was born to be a mother. What made her dream bigger about it was the fact Gray would one day be a father to them. 

Ten to fifteen minutes later, Levy returns with a plastic bag. Containing some comfort food and of course a pregnancy test. 

Juvia hesitantly takes the test, and heads inside the bathroom. 

She follows the instructions while her heart beats worryingly fast. In fear of the answer, she slaps the test into Levy's hand while they wait a few minutes for the result, not wanting to see for herself. 

"Juv..." Levy calls after a few minutes. 

Juvia peaks up from her slouch as she sat on the end of the bed, her teeth grinding with anticipation. 

"It's positive." 

Juvia had trouble believing it. She was actually pregnant? Even though she was going to beat herself up for not being more careful, a hint of joy sprung out of nowhere. Hormones, perhaps?

A brief smile emerges on Juvia's round, porcelain face, while her eyes are screaming. She's actually, after all these years, going to have a baby with the man she's wanted to the most. Just a little bit earlier than she had originally planned.

Gray doesn't return for another month. After this, she wouldn't be able to bare another moment with him not knowing. 

"When does Gray get back?" 

"Just over a month... I don't know what I want to do..." 

_ _ _

On the couch, dressed in her boyfriend's shirt and a pair of shorts, Juvia sat in peace and comfort while skimming the pages of one of her favourite books to pass time. Gray's arrival was due that day. Juvia had a burst of anticipation to see her boyfriend after so long, but coated with fear in addition. 

Juvia slams her book as she catches the sound of keys turning the locks. After discovering she's pregnant with her Gray-sama's baby, she'd spent the previous month reading pregnancy books, making space for the baby in the spare bedroom, which was previously used as a storage room which would grow like mould. For the majority, she'd be sleeping and having naps three times a day, and throwing up anything that'd enter her body. Her cravings were wild, her tongue rejected almost all of her favourite foods, including her most adored Gray buns. 

Juvia'a smile lightens Gray's life up as he opens the door. His jacket is immediately stripped without a thought and his arms around her body, first pulling her closer to him and their lips briefly locking for a sweet moment. Juvia's hands crawl up to his neck, she retracts her lips for a second and tugs him back for an even deeper, more tender one. 

"Fuck," Gray curses in a breath, "I've missed these lips," He kisses her once more, "I've missed you." 

He makes her squeak as he grabs her thighs. Juvia loops her legs around his waist as an immediate reaction, giggling and melting into the strong, hungry kisses. Gray's tongue surprises her as he licks her bottom lip, needing to meet with hers. By how he was moving towards the bedroom, tugging his teeth at her lip and occasionally licking, his crotch pressed right against hers, she knew what he wanted and was aware he wanted it now. 

"Gray..." She pants, breaking the kiss. 

Gray ignores her, assuming her words are more of a moan and slips his tongue inside her mouth. She allows his tongue to take control of her mouth, being distracted by his taste and moving into a moment of bliss. Then reality slaps her in the face as her back hits a door. 

"Gray, I need to talk to you." Worried and out of breath, her usual third person switches to first. 

Gray's lips halt their work, his eyes opening and hands becoming looser, dropping her to the ground delicately. 

"Are you okay?" His fingers brush through her bangs, tracing to the side of her porcelain face. 

She nods, retaining a smile and she takes his hand, turning around and opening the door to their bedroom. She takes them to a bed, this time for conversational purposes, not making hot, sweet love. 

Holding his hand, her eyes flutter close, mouth intaking a deep breath, releasing a sigh a second after. "Remember that time, you and Juvia were out in the fields outside of town, stargazing?" 

Gray's smirk startles her, "Oh yeah, I remember that night." He recalls the sex immediately. 

"You also remember making love then?" She urges the memory, and a possible yearning sensation in Gray's boxers. 

"Yes?" He took note something was wrong rather quickly. 

"And how you had to pull out since Juvia wasn't on the pill that week, and we didn't have a condom?" 

He nods, eyes narrowing. 

"Well," She chokes on her words, unable to confess immediately, "you may have pulled out a moment too late..."

She pressures herself inside her own head "Spit it out, Juvia!". She'd had the perfect pep talk from Levy, and was convinced she'd have no trouble revealing her pregnancy. 

Luckily, words didn't have to be used. A more convenient way was also possible for her. 

Juvia lifts up her sweater, having a tighter t-shirt underneath. She holds the top of Gray's hand, and guides it to her stomach, having him feel her bump, confessing her pregnancy in a nonverbal way. 

Gray's eyes break from hers, darting to her stomach and widening, his reaction unreadable from Juvia's perspective. 

Juvia's concern over his reaction rises, as he wasn't uttering a sound. About to panic, scream of how she had the worst feeling in the world she knew he'd be against it, Gray's free hand holds the other side of her small bump. The anxiety in his eyes had faded, and gazing with awe in replacement. 

"Gray-sama?" Juvia says, after many silent moments of listening to each others breaths. 

"There's actually... a baby us in there?"

Having him say "a baby us" melted Juvia's heart. Out of all the possible ways Gray could've responded it, that she was not expecting. "Yes. What do you think?" 

He doesn't respond straight away, continuing to gaze at her bump, his hands trailing over it and lightly caressing. He catches Juvia off guard when his lips swiftly kiss hers. He places excited, soft, joyful kisses from her lips, to the corner of her mouth, cheeks and forehead. Juvia's unable to contain a smile, giggling into the final heartfelt, impassioned kiss. Her arm loops around his neck, deepening their kiss, while his hand is at the back of her neck and one staying on her bump. 

"Gray-sama is happy?" Her eyes widen with joy.

"Yes!" He exclaims while kissing her once more. 

She pulls away, out of breath with a hyper voice, "Gray-sama wants to have a baby with Juvia?" 

He pushes himself further back, regaining some control, taking her hands into his, "Well... Yeah. We've been together for two years. I know we both thought marriage would come first - I'll be honest, having a baby right now will be scary as we weren't trying for one and it's just happened. I know I don't bring up the thought of us having a child together often, as it's more of a you thing..." He pauses, nervously taking a bite at his lip, "But I knew we'd end up having one eventually. If you're happy with one now, so am I." 

Juvia's face had blushed immensely red throughout his words. There's no way in hell Gray would confess that in front of the entire guild. Having him say it to her face, while holding her hands, was just enough for her. 

_ _ _

Two days had passed. Gray and Juvia spent the weekend together, discussing their excitement over the baby, and mainly catching up on the past two months apart. 

First night back, Gray's sleep was muddled and would wake up at least three times during the night. His emotions were complicated to explain, but he could sum them up and admit his happiness. The news may have not fully kicked in, and he was shocked of how Juvia seemed to be able to relax, sit peacefully on a couch and read books. Yet again, she had just spent a month by herself well aware of what was growing inside her. 

The two agreed they'd wait a few weeks before fully announcing it to the guild, plus Gray's shyness. However, an infamous dragon slayer had other plans. 

Juvia was clothed in baggier clothes than normal, concealing her bump as her tighter dresses were incapable of that. Gray, Natsu and Lucy were sat at a table in the centre of the guild. Natsu throwing unintentional flirtatious comments at Lucy, and would receive relatively harsh slaps in the bicep in return. 

"Hi everyone." Juvia sweetly announces herself as she slides beside Gray, discretely grasping his fingers as she's sat down. 

"Hey, Juvia." Natsu grins, which soon disappears as his nose begins to twitch. 

"Something wrong?" Gray questions. 

He nods, his sniffing becoming more obvious, "Can you smell that?" 

"I can't." Gray shrugged, raising an eyebrow at Juvia. 

"We don't have the nose of a beast like you," Lucy giggles, "What is it?" 

Natsu leans forward, following his scent with his sight in attempt to locate it, which his glare ends on Juvia. "It's you!" 

She jumps at his forwardness, gripping Gray's hand firmer. "Huh?" 

"There's something different about you... new perfume?" She shakes her head in response, "It may be the dress, never seen you in something so loose." 

"Watch your mouth, pervert." Gray growls as he takes Natsu's innocent comment more crudely. 

"You're calling me a pervert!?" Natsu immediately bites back. 

Lucy slaps her hand to Natsu's shoulder, pushing him back into the seat, "It doesn't take much for you to get riled up, does it?" 

"Seriously though," He flounces out his hands towards Juvia, "Something is different! I can smell it!" Lucy sighs and hushes him as his bellowing was grabbing the rest of the guilds attention. 

Juvia and Gray eye each other in fear. Natsu may not have the IQ of a genius, however his nose is powerful enough to sense any form of change. Lucy quickly takes note of the glance they exchange, figuring out by the scent and the stares, something is certainly up. 

"Wait..." Her eyes narrow in query, "Is something actually different, Juvia?" Her choice of tone more calm than Natsu's, easing the two of them. 

Juvia's eyes slant as her leg bounces in anxiety. Announcing her pregnancy five days earlier than planned would certainly drive Gray crazy. He hasn't mentally prepared himself for the attention and congrats as he's soon to be a father. 

"Well..." 

"Juvia!" Gray objects. 

Juvia releases a frustrated breath, "Gray-sama, there's no harm-" 

"I'm not ready to tell yet!" 

"You're pregnant." 

Juvia and Gray's heated stare breaks as Natsu points a finger at them, shockingly figuring out their secret much quicker than expected. 

Lost for words, the two gape like blank minded sheep. 

"I'm right, right?" 

Gray's opinion on Natsu is still pretty low, even though over the past years it had risen. How on earth did he figure it out in the snap of his fingers!? 

In Juvia's head, it made sense. He wouldn't ask if they were engaged as her scent would remained the same. With the evidence of looser clothes, the scent, secrecy, there's no hiding her pregnancy from him! 

"Yes... Juvia is pregnant." Getting it off her chest to her closest friends, minus Gajeel who already knew, was a relief. Her confession initiated a smile to tug at her delicate lips, watching the two with stars in their eyes as they take in the information, while Gray slams his face into the palms of his hands. 

"You sneaky little fucker!" Natsu's method of congratulations are somewhat unique, "Nice!"

"Oh my god!" Lucy squeals in delight as her hands hyperly applaud, "I'm so happy for you!" 

"Thank you," Juvia caresses her bump under the table, "We weren't planning on one of course. But Juvia thinks she's ready for a baby, and so does Gray-sama." 

Gray pulls himself up from the grave of his hands, admitting a smile to Juvia, taking her hand and placing his lips on her knuckles. He may not express his love for her much in public, but that tiny gesture said it all. 

"Yeah... I am."

_ _ _

[quietmyfearswith]

new year’s day ; andy barber x fem!reader

status — completed oneshot

word count — 3,960 words

warnings — swearing, mentions of active sex life, SMUT, degradation, sir kink, choking, oral smut (receiving), fingering, unprotected penetrative sex (pls use protection), slapping, name calling, drinking champagne off of one’s body, fluff at the end?? porn without plot lol

pairing — andy barber x fem!reader

a/n — HAPPY NEW YEAR! im still high on my andy feels so yeah,, lmk what yoou think!

masterlist

“Fuckin’ hell my eyes hurt,” Y/N groaned out as she rubbed her palms on her eyelids, as if she was massaging the stress away. Rose could only chuckle at her friend’s distress, “Well I did warn you about how you shouldn't have gone to work today; you deserve to take a break once in a while you know?”

Cracking her knuckles once she was done rubbing her eyes, Y/N retorted, “Well it’s not like I had any New Year’s Eve plans so I decided why not go to work?” As she continued to torment her eyes with the light emitted from her desktop. Being her only real friend at the workplace, Rose took it as a responsibility to look after her; for she knew how she wasn’t really close with her family and her other closest friends were on the different side of the country. “Hey, I invited you to that party me and Agnes are going to!”

Tearing her straining eyes away from the screen, Y/N gave the brunette a pointed look, “You mean to say you invited me to party where I don’t know anyone but you and your girlfriend; which definitely guarantees that you’ll both leave me alone so you can fuck.”

Rose didn’t find it in herself to deny her allegation or defend her and her girlfriend’s active sex life; instead she could only give her a sheepish look as she joked, “Guess you’ve been spending too much time with Mr. Barber since you’re incredible at drawing conclusions and noticing patterns huh?” Seeing how much time she had spent with the mentioned lawyer over the past year, Y/N couldn’t help but nod and agree with her.

The soft chime of Rose's Favorite song rang and a cocky, “See! Can’t even wait an hour before you two get to be together,” was quickly being hushed by her friend. “Okay you have a point, we have a high sex drive — but can you blame us? And I need to leave early, stupid bitch burnt herself as she was baking.”

Chuckling without tearing her eyes away from the documents in front of her, Y/N greeted, “Yeah, yeah; don’t need to rub it in. Happy New Year’s Eve, babe.” Before heading to Mr. Barber’s office to sweetly ask to leave early, Rose went to where Y/N was seated and let their cheeks touch as their way of bidding adieu.

Andy was more than generous to allow Rose to leave the office early, “Go ahead and enjoy, you deserve it for being one of the few ones who chose to come in today,” He told her smiling form. Once she left his office, he loosened his tie and undid the top button of his button down shirt and let out a loud groan. Usually, this time last year he would be rushing to go home — if ever his work demanded his presence — in order to celebrate the New Year’s with his family. But now as he mourns the family he once had and lost it as his son was brutally killed by his ex-wife that had gone insane in disbelieving her son’s innocence was now serving prison for her crimes, he had nowhere to be.

After a couple of hours filled with silence and burying his head with paperwork, Andy noticed how there was a soft, melodious hymn coming from the other side of the office. The lawyer wasn’t necessarily alarmed, but he was curious about who was left working since there had only been 7 other people who decided to come in to work today; and to his knowledge they should have left by now.

He decided to check out who was left — but it really was an excuse to stretch his long, lean legs as he felt them cramping up a bit from being seated for too long — and was surprised to see the most diligent employee he’s ever met in his years of practicing law, “Ms. Y/N, what are you still doing here?”

Hearing his deep voice snapped her out of her concentration; seeing her boss in his less than organized state had her taken aback, “Oh Mr. Barber, I’m just doing some work on the Richards case.” Looking at the watch on his left wrist, he took note how it was a mere 15 minutes before the new year dawned on them. “No plans for the new year then?”

Deciding to test the waters she cracked a joke, “Are you talking about the holiday or the actual year? Because I have no plans for both.”Covering up her remark with a nervous chuckle, she was glad to see the older man wrinkle his eyes as he laughed out loud, “Well that makes the two of us; why don’t we grab a drink in my office?”

Eyes going wide and gasping silently, Y/N was pleasantly surprised at his offer but nevertheless nodded in agreement. Quickly shutting off her desktop, she moved out of her chair and decided to leave her footwear and floral kimono by her desk as she somewhat felt restricted by the light cloth. As she entered his post, she settled herself on the gray sofa he had placed near the office’s wall. Grabbing a bottle of champagne and a couple of glasses, Andy sat beside her then poured them a drink.

“Never pegged you as a champagne guy, Mr. Barber,” She thanked him as he handed her a glass which she took a sip of; letting out a small moan of appreciation at the taste, the  sound causing Andy to cross his right leg on top of the left in an effort to conceal his erection. “Please, call me Andy,” He cleared his throat as he took a sip of the liquor, “And whiskey and bourbon are my usual choices of poison; but since it’s the New Year, figured this was more appropriate.”

Y/N surprised the man beside her by drinking all of the champagne in one go and placed the now empty glass on the coffee table in front of them before turning to his gobsmacked expression and giggled, “Sorry, really need that one.” With his hooded eyes watching her intently, he drank some of his before answering, “Don’t be Y/N, it was quite a show.”

She could feel her wetness dampen the panties she wore with how good her name sounded as it left his lips, “Don’t think I ever heard you call me by my first name before.” Worried he crossed the line he was quick to fumble out an apology; but quickly stopped as he felt her hand on his thigh, “It’s okay, I’m not mad or anything. I really like it, actually,” She trailed off once she noticed how he seemed to have let out a quiet, but aroused purr. Tilting her head to the side with an amused expression plastered on her face, “You alright, Andy?”

Years of practicing law and appearing in courtrooms taught him not to lose composure; but with a simple touch and mention of his name had Andy forgetting how to remain calm and collected. But can you fucking blame him when the girl who walks around with so much grace and confidence — who also happens to be the subject of his filthy fantasies — is so close to him that he can almost feel her warmth piercing through his long-sleeved shirt. In that moment, he wasn’t sure if it was a wise or dumb decision to discard his suit jacket, but as their arms touched and he felt a surge of electricity run through his veins, he thought of himself as a fucking genius.

“I am, yeah,” Deciding to test the waters, he grabbed her hand that rested on her thigh and intertwined their fingers together; when she made no attempts at removing her hand from his he smirked, “Correct me if I’m wrong, but something tells me you want more than just this champagne I offered.”

Feeling her inhibitions disappear, she gave him a smirk of her own as she untangled her hands from his, “Well, I do want some more champagne,” Her finger was now tracing his lips as she moved to sit closer until she was now straddling his lap, “Maybe taste it from your lips?”

Silently, Andy brought the glass to his lips and downed the remaining sparkling drink; his free hand settled itself on the back of her neck, pulling her close to him until her lips touched his. As he bit her bottom lip, she opened her mouth and moaned out loud as she felt the alcoholic beverage enter her mouth. Both her hands caressed his bearded cheek as she drank up every last drop that he offered her. Groaning out loud when his mouth was now devoid of the drink, he let his tongue enter her mouth and asserted his dominance; something she willingly conceded to him. His hand on her neck traveled lower and rested on her bum, squeezing the soft flesh which emitted more moans from her.

“Been dreaming about this for so long,” His staff silently, mindlessly let out as she kissed him desperately. “Is that so?” He asked once he broke away their kiss, Y/N whined at the loss of his lips and confused with his question. Chuckling at her groggy state he squeezed both her cheeks with one hand, forcing her to focus on him and answer his question, “You said you’ve been dreaming about this, baby. Is that what you daydream about at work? Me fucking you so hard your dumb brain can’t even think straight?”

Letting out a pathetic whine, she could only nod her head enthusiastically, “Want that so fucking bad, sir.” He felt his cock harden even more at the title she called him; but he wasn’t even done with teasing her yet. “And that fantasy will come true; but first, stand up and strip for me, baby,” With a soft smack on her cheek, she stood up quickly and unzipped her dress. Andy watched her present her body for him as he poured another glass for himself.

Resting on the arm rest was the hand with the sparkling champagne, while the other was palming his erection as watched her push her dress down to the floor. “No bra? Just that poor excuse of underwear?” He moaned out as he observed the fabric that parts at the middle, teasing the paradise that awaits for his cock.

Lowering her gaze, as if bashful, at his filthy remarks before resuming her previous position of sitting on his lap with her hands moving to unbutton his button down. “Such an impatient little thing, aren’t you?” He clicked his tongue at her; to which she pouted as she stared at him with want written on her face, “I’m sorry, sir. What do you want me to do?”

“Ride my thigh like the slut you are, baby,” He commanded her without even thinking about it, which turned her on even more. Situating herself on his thick, lean thigh she moaned out loud as the fabric of her thong added even more friction. She began to ride him with slow but sharp movements, throwing her head back when she felt her wetness taint the fabric of his slacks, “How does it feel, baby?”

“Good, so good,” Her broken cries turned him on even more as he sipped on the champagne, enjoying the tingle it left on his tongue. “Do you trust me, baby?” Surprised at his question, she opened her eyes to look at him, her hip movements not faltering one bit. Upon seeing how serious he was she answered, “I do, Andy. I trust you.”

With a smirk, he then tipped the glass just above her breasts, allowing the liquid to run from her collarbones and down to her breasts. Gasping out loud when Andy runs his tongue on her skin, following the trail that the champagne took, “Don’t stop grinding on me, love,” He reminded her as his lips drank the liquid that landed on her nipple — subsequently sucking on the pebble-like flesh. Seeking purchase on his dark hair, Y/N continued rubbing herself on his thigh — his assault on her breast encouraging her to ride him even harder and faster.

“Time to drink some more,” Andy huskily spoke out as he poured some more of the beverage on her opposite breast  causing the girl to stiffen a bit as she was taken aback by the sudden coolness on her breast. His tongue flattened against her skin, now more focused on kissing every inch of her skin instead of drinking up the liquor. His hand held her breast firmly, raising it a bit so he could suck on it and slurp the booze.

“Fuck, the champagne tastes even incredible on you, baby,” HIid praise got her flustered and she could only whine as she felt herself getting closer. “I’m so close, sir. Can I cum, please?” She fluttered her eyes at him sweetly, hoping he’d show her mercy; but his wicked smile and wink got her thinking she’d be shown the opposite of it. “Not yet, baby,” He was quick to shut her wails up with a smack on her breast, “Sit down on the sofa, baby.”

Even though she denied him her release, she followed his orders without a complaint — working with him provided her a clear picture of what happens when you don’t follow Andy’s orders, and it didn’t end well for everyone involved. As she sat down, she watched as the lawyer placed his glass on the table and reached for the bottle; poured some on her pussy. Y/N watched closely as Andy licked her clit, down to her hole. Without tearing his eyes away from hers, he inserted his tongue in her and tried to reach as far as his long tongue can go. “So good, Andy,” She grabbed onto his hair, pushing his face closer to her. The man was quick to smack her thigh, causing her to press her thighs more into his frame, “You know what to call me,” He warned.

“Sir,” She panted out, “Feel so good, sir.” Pleased with that, he rewarded her by rubbing his right thumb on her clit, making her moan even louder. Loving her blissed out sounds of pleasure, Andy began licking her ferociously; he drank up all of the champagne he poured and all the juices she had to provide. He inserted his left pointer and middle finger in her, taking her aback with the sudden simulation. Her thighs were shaking with how good he was making her feel, too weak to even grab onto his hair and her arms were now limp on her sides, “Sir, please! I’m so fucking close, please let me cum.”

Without tearing his mouth and hands from her he replied, “Then cum on my fucking tongue, you slut,” The vibrations adding more to the pleasure she felt. After a few more thrusts of his fingers, kitten licks of his tongue, she felt apart with a scream. Her thighs wrapped themselves around his shoulders, squeezing him so tight that she felt his beard tickle her delicate skin. Andy pulled out his fingers that were in her, replacing them with his tongue so he can gather all of her juices and drink some of them in. “You taste like fucking heaven, baby,” He groaned as he parted from her pussy, his fingers pushing her juices back inside her so he could use it as lube.

“Wanna kiss you, sir,” Her fingers touched the patch of facial hair above his lips, surprised with how it had her juices. Andy complied, giving her a brief, but sweet kiss. “Want you on your hands and knees, baby. Hold on to the back of the sofa okay?” Y/N couldn’t help but feel mushy with how gentle he was bossing her around — when she knew his next actions would be far from gentle.

Holding on to the back of the sofa, she used it to steady herself on her knees, bending slightly so she could arch her back to accentuate her ass. Andy quickly discarded his clothes before rubbing her pussy again and pushed some of her juices in, before entering in her pussy in one go. His forehead rested on her back as he groaned out, “Fuck baby you’re so tight. Been a while huh?” Anchoring himself on her hips, he slid in and out of her at a steady pace.

Y/N moaned out loud as she felt the back of her thighs meet Andy’s hips; he was thrusting into her with no remorse. Her hand travelled to her breast, switching between pinching the nipple or pulling on it. Grabbing her hair with one hand, the bearded man pulled her so her back was pressed firmly against his chest. You’d think that this would give Andy a difficult time to rut into her but it didn’t; instead it just made him drive his cock in her harder and faster, falling into a drum-like rhythm.

“Why are you fucking touching yourself, slut?” Feeling his breath on her ear turned her on more than she cared to admit and she couldn’t even string together a coherent response since the tip of his dick pushed into her g-spot, causing her to moan out loud. “You’re such a fucking mess that you can’t even think straight huh?”

Nodding pathetically was all the response Y/N could offer as she clawed on to Andy’s toned arms; the lawyer then decided to go all the way with his fun by wrapping his big hand around her neck, applying gentle pressure. “You don’t mind this do you, sweetheart?” Shaking her head no, Andy then smiled as he put more force on the sides of her neck as he rammed his cock in her until the tip of his cock repeatedly hit her bundle of nerves that made tears leave her eyes with how good everything felt. The other hand that wasn't wrapped around her throat then lowered itself on her clit, rubbing the hardened nub.

“If only you knew how hard you got me every time you came to work with a tight skirt or pants,” He breathed out against her ear, tickling her with his breath, “Giving me a perfect view of the shape of your ass,” And to emphasize his point he thrust so hard until his cock was all the way in and spanked her ass. “Walking around the office with so much fucking confidence,” He recalled the time wherein she called out an officemate for talking lewdly about her — that caused him to jerk one off in the office bathroom. “But now you’ve been reduced to a dumb cock hungry whore for me,” She wailed out in agreement as his hand squeezed her throat so tight to the point she was now gasping for breath as his other hand wrapped around her tit, loving the weight and feel of it on his hand, grabbing onto it to move it up and down his hand.

“Are you gonna cum again, baby? Gonna cum around my thick cock?” He could feel her walls clinging on to his cock even more, making it difficult to thrust in her but he was determined to keep on sliding his cock in and out. “Yes, so close, please let me cum,” She trailed off as he abandoned his hold on her tit and throat and returned to her hips so he could maneuver her and ram his cock swiftly and harder. “Cum then you, slut. Let me feel you milk my cock,” Was all the permission she needed before she dug her nails into his forearms as came with a scream, “Thank you, sir!”

Even as she was cumming, Andy thrust in and out of her; though his thrusts weren’t as powerful and quick. Once he felt her spasms die down, he slid all the way inside her and came with a groan. They both could feel his cock twitch as it released his load inside her, filling her up with his hot semen. Littering kisses on her back, Andy could feel his regular breathing return — as was hers.

Carefully, Andy pulled out of her, “Can you stand up for a bit, baby?” She nodded and stood up from her position, the lawyer guiding her to sit by the arm rests. Still stuck in her post-orgasm haze, she watched as he moved the coffee table away and transformed his sofa into a bed. Grabbing the spare bed sheet, blanket, and pillows he kept in the office — in case he had to spend the night in the office — he quickly made the bed before he helped Y/N to lay down with him, wrapping the blanket over their naked bodies.

“How you feeling?” It was amazing how he had a quick change of demeanor; Y/N was lazily tracing over Andy’s face with her finger, making the most out of this intimate moment. “Feel good, really good. Always wanted someone to fuck me the way you did.”

Her curt response had him chuckling, loving the way she was being open with him and the way she traced over his features. “Well I’m glad I fulfilled this fantasy of yours.”

Suddenly, Y/N felt small and insecure; was this a one time thing? Just something to release his frustrations and a fantasy of hers that's been fulfilled? Furrowing her eyebrows, she failed to mask her worry as she wondered, “So this is just a one time thing then?”

Hating what she just said, Andy kissed the wrinkle in between her eyebrows as he spoke, “I don’t want it to be. I really want to be with you; if you’ll have me, of course.” A small smile rested on her lips as her eyes brightened up, “I’d want that and you. You’re so amazing, Andy. I admire your strength, resilience, and determination. For someone who could easily give up in life you choose to carry on and look forward to what the future holds. It’s just a bonus that you have a thick cock and know how to use it.”

Her small speech had him chuckling and kissing her nose, pulling her close against him, “What I said earlier was true; I love how you walk around the office like you own the place. You take no shit from people and do your job damn well. Plus, I love your music taste as well.”

Grinning at him she jeered, “Wow can’t believe you still sweet talk your way even if it’s not in a courtroom setting.” Andy laughed at her retort and just grazed his fingertips on her sides, tickling her so he can hear her giggle. Once both their laughter died down, their lips met for a sweet, passionate kiss. “We have quite a mess to clean up tomorrow, Andy,” Y/N reminded him as she referred to the champagne bottle, glasses, their clothes, and his sofa bed — their whole situation, really.

“I don’t care,” He whispered as smiled at her, feeling so much lighter and better having been haunted by his personal demons for so long, “I don’t mind doing anything as long as it’s with you.”

Her heart fluttered with his simple statement; she was then reminded of the new year countdown. Reaching out for his wrist, she checked the time and noticed how a few minutes had passed 12. “Happy new year, Andy,” She greeted him with a peck on his lips.

A short, sweet kiss was returned to her as he planted his lips on hers again — quickly getting addicted to her, “Happy new year, baby. Can’t wait to spend this year with you by my side.”

[ratsoh-writes]

How about some fluffy hcs for Underlust, Swapfell, Mafiafell, Fellswap Red, Horrorswap? (￣ω￣)

Alrighty!

Mal

He’s super good at painting nails. He has one of those kits where you can put little patterns on the nails too. Mal uses cash as his practice dummy. Cash loves it

Ever since his brother got sober, as a show of respect for him, mal almost never touched anything alcoholic, and will always refuse a drink if his brother is there. The only times he drinks is when he’s taste testing one of wines new cocktails

Cash

When he was younger, cash had to have braces over his canines to keep them from growing too big. He still has a little bit of an overbite though.

Cash LOVES fairy lights and just good lighting in general. His room feels depressing when it’s dark. He has no sense of fashion though. All his fairy lights are completely different colors and totally mismatched. His favorite string is the ones that look like those little Jamaican pepper stuffed animals

Lord

As a property owner and landlord, there are some days where nothing needs fixing, no bills need to be paid, and everybody is happy. To fill the time, lord likes to garden. He takes a huge amount of pride in his perfect red rose bushes

Lord really likes sweater vests and polo shirts. If it wasn’t for mal and wines intervention, he’d totally dress like a grandpa. They find and gift him things that fit his style but still follow today’s trends lol

Mutt

There aren’t too many people that mutt is friendly with. He’s not lonely though. Mutt truly doesn’t mind the solitude and enjoys just wandering around on his own. If he wasn’t so insistent on staying with his brother, he’d probably be one of those guys who backpacks around the world

Mutt has four gold teeth on one side of his face. They’re all on the top half of his mouth and are all touching. No matter how many times he has them out in, he always seems to find a way to knock one out. He’s his dentists favorite patient

Charm

Charm uses pet names for every one and everything. Literally everything. If he thinks no one is listening, he’ll tell his cakes that he thinks they’re absolutely stunning today. Complimenting the cakes makes him feel better about his work lol

Even though charm is an absolute master at wearing heels, he hates them with a burning passion. He’s never met a pair of heels that didn’t pinch his toes somehow. Instead he just wears those Jesus sandals all the time

Sugar

Sugar is very physically affectionate with his platonic friends and will totally platonically hold hands or give cheek kisses if they let him. He never lets anyone sit in his lap though. That’s SO privileges only

Besides lacy skirts or his classic booty shorts, sugar is also a big fan of crazy patterned leggings paired with crop tops. His sense of fashion is all over the place lol

Butch

There was one time bruiser played a prank on butch by spelling out curse words on his rooms ceiling with those little glow in the dark stars. It backfired because butch loved it, and when the brothers had to move, he bought another pack of the stars and did it himself.

You know butch is in a really good mood that day if he offers one of his bros a thin mint. They’re literally the only sweet that he likes enough to buy himself. And butch doesn’t like sharing

Boss

He absolutely loves cats but doesn’t want to commit to taking care of one. It also doesn’t help that snipe has this weird knack for finding abandoned kittens all the time. Whenever snipe finds yet another mama with a litter, him and boss will “work together” that day. Every one knows they’re just cooing over the cats in snipes office though lol

As the best healer of the brothers, boss is the one they all go to for injuries, but also minor scrapes or just stubbing a toe. Boss will gripe and b*tch about them wasting his time, but he always makes sure to numb the pain and heal the scratch. So they keep coming back

Lilac

He suffered a little eye damage from his injuries during the famine, so lilac needs glasses when he drives. He has the cutest square framed ones. It’s always either mint green or mustard yellow frames

Speaking of driving, after he got fitted with a prosthetic leg that gave him full movement, the first thing he did was learn to drive. Lilac has a huge soccer mom van covered in goofy pun bumper stickers. He loves it. Basil thinks it’s the tackiest thing on earth

Basil

He is an avid gardener and is just as fiercely protective over his baby tomatoes as he is his kitchen. Unfortunately for basil, the neighborhood that he lives in is right next to the forest surrounding mount ebott. That means deer. And lots of them. He has a fence but there’s always one persistent bugger. That’s where his BB gun comes in. If he sees a deer in his back garden, he’ll pop them in the butt to scare it off. Don’t worry this doesn’t actually harm the deer

Basil also likes to do diy with willow sometimes. There’s a small park in the neighborhood with a ton of large walnut trees that the kids all play on. Basil and willow built treehouses in two of them for the kids. Basil likes kids a lot and finds it much easier to talk to them then most other people

[nightmarearian]

Helpshit haha :,D

Right right right so hey uh So in school, we're examining the Hero's Journey (This feels weird asking for some help on school work, but my friend isn't into pokemon and I need validation, and also possible fleshed out fan fic??? Or just side blog art project thing) The hero's journey is, very, very simplified, a realized pattern in most stories. -> Status Quo -> Call to Action (Status Quo Disrupted) -> Preparation (Allies, Tools) -> Crossing the Threshold -> Road of Challenges -> Supreme Ordeal -> Gift of Accomplishment -> Return -> Master of Two Worlds -> Elixir (Status Quo Fixed) Not all of them need to be checked but yeah. So for our summative (test) we kinda need to write our own story of of this. And uh: 2 things 1. Help...? Just revisions and suggestions/ideas, if possible. Mainly for the "road of challenges", to have something else other than frienzed nobles. 2. Any of you interested in me making this an actual story? Fleshed out and all? And I'd probably include Ingo more. anywaysanyways thought process under the cut

Amnesiac - Wakes up …somewhere? Tunnel? Icelands? → wayward cave, “somehow remembering directions”. → Figures out (Aspect)→ Ambiguous ending? Original world or other world? Emmet or Hisui? Or I could expand on Distortion (Lost in Distortion or Distortion Guide AU). Maybe → Amnesiac - “I am looking for…” “...” “Who am I looking for?”→ Or not. That type of writing doesn’t fit. Oh! OH → Amnesiac but it was that theory that it was a Zorua(rk) stuck in a human form? Oh that’d be cool. I’d also be able to put in the stupid moral thing. Friends can be found anywhere, or something. Something about people still considering the Zorua a friend after. Hhhh I mean it also fits with Kamado banishment OH OH GIRITINA HUMAN THey can wake up in Turnback Cave! ANd there’s also a free exposition dump! Whoop lol.…wait names. Shoot Giri would be what? A bit cynical, suspicious. Aroace, it/its …I mean giri is probably a bit egotistical but that’s off of experience, right? And I dunno how to write egotistical characters. AesgzrdyhxtfVauge about themselves. → Sensory overloaded easily → Gets used to it after a while → treats gravity as if it’s no existent to it. … I mean it probably is to it, so suspicion Ingo? Maybe Giri remembers emmet from Distortion? And then is friends with Ingo? Then it could’ve woken up around Coronet Highlands. …I mean. uhafesgzrdhxtfOr it’s flagged as a skyfaller and meets Ingo and MC Akari due to that. Akari → Arceus Aspect? Ideals are also kinda strong so (Aspect) Ingo gravitates towards it.…wait then what. WOuld… huh. Maybe another of the creation trio is frenzied? Maybe arcoos so it has to have their opposite calm them? Dialga + Palika would be holding it back then. Bruh they’d be tired as hell But arceus would beat their ass. eh hand wavy magic bs That’d make sense that’d make sense. Maybe the other nobles are frenzied then? It doesn’t really need the nobles’ help, since it’s Giri and the not frenzied nobles could just be high-strung. So -> Giri wakes up at Cobalt Coastlands → Found by Iscan or Paulina → Taken to Pearl/Diamond/Galaxy → Introduced to Akari/Ingo → Either Braviary gets frenzied first, basculegion first (cobalt, turnback), or wydeer. → Akari, for some reason, cannot calm them (Arceus Aspect and the frenzied aura is like Giri’s?) → Giri goes to calm them → Rinse and repeat → God dang it Volo (or not volo. maybe volo. trauma to giri, baby) → Frienzed Arceus (Perphaps he’s glitching in a sort?) → Giri remembers → post”game” --------- Right right uh yeah. i'd love to turn it into an actual fic (Oh and all the links under "Aspect" are different links check them out.)

[lilypixels]

...............all of them.....?

It took me an hr to do this....🥲💀

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

Teacupsss

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

Lollipops

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

Uhhh cotton candy

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

Probably quiet and smart lol I did my school work and was friendly with everyone so I was a favorite and heard all the nice things 🙈

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?

I kinda like bottles more but like the glass ones with the caps that could slice your fingers-

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

I’m for all but sports lol

7. earbuds or headphones?

Earbuds

8. movies or tv shows?

Shows cause I’m the type to watch an hr long episode vs hr long movie idk why but I’m rarely in mood for them

12. name of your favorite playlist?

Drop the beat (ie songs that are upbeat and I like most)

13. lanyard or key ring?

Hmm...I guess lanyard?

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

Skittles or twizzlers

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

I had lots I had to read in school but only ever finished a handful lol my favorite I think was maybe Macbeth? I would say Odyssey but I don’t think we read the full thing cause I remember being disappointed about something like that...

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

Sitting with my legs bent up in seat with me in some way

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

Converse and some nice but cheap sneakers from Walmart

18. ideal weather?

Not too hot, not too cold, mild like before/after a rain (most the time), idc if it’s raining or sunny but as long as temp is comfortable I’m fine

19. sleeping position?

On my side most often

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

Phone and notebook

21. obsession from childhood?

Oh gosh uhhh I guess my like of dolls maybe? Or obsession with anything ✨unexplained✨ like ghosts, aliens, cryptids, etc

22. role model?

Kim Namjoon lol just kidding (sorta)

23. strange habits?

Ok I know I have some and my friends would be more than happy to point them all out but hm let me think...idk if these count as habits but I’ll never place a mirror facing a bed (this is more superstitious I guess than habit,,,) I can’t stand my food touching, if I have a tray like in cafeteria I have a certain spot for everything and uh my mind just went blank-

24. favorite crystal?

Moonstone, lapis lazuli, and I feel obligated to say garnet cause it’s my birthstone

25. first song you remember hearing?

Circle of Life maybe who knows xD

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

Walk or clean,,I’m more active and about with warm/nice weather

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

...stay inside where it’s warm

28. five songs to describe you?

Not this again😭 uhhh idk you tell me ajdbd

29. best way to bond with you?

Indulge me when I go off about things I like or learn 😔✊ I know I’ll talk your ear off and I’m sorry but know I don’t often talk about these things with people so once I start it’s hard to stop,,and it makes me really happy when people do listen to me about these things and send me related items every so often or even look into it themselves to learn more 🥺

30. places that you find sacred?

For some reason this feels like a trick question...um cemeteries and anything with ages of history I guess

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

Oof do I really have a true outfit?? I have shoes for this which are just black platform sneakers I call stomping shoes

32. top five favorite vines?

I never,,,watched these,,,

33. most used phrase in your phone?

“Yes”...?

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

State Farm and McDonald’s, always

35. average time you fall asleep?

10-11...usually...

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?

Uhhh that one with the ginger dude (I think it was someone’s yearbook photo??) I don’t remember much else about the meme but it was on ifunny, or whatever the app was, a lot

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

Suitcase

38. lemonade or tea?

Easy, tea

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

...neither

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

Dude these questions really testing my brain power here- for senior prank someone put cereal in some bathroom sinks I think

41. last person you texted?

My mom

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

I’m gonna say jacket since I wear those often

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

Hoodie or cardigan

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

Fantasy

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

Usually whatever shirt I’m wearing that day and some pj/lounge pants 🤷

47. favorite type of cheese?

Mozzarella

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?

I-what kind of question is this? How does one even answer this?

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

What comes around goes around lol (yes I’m a heavy believer of karma)

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

Lol who knows, probably something dumb me and my siblings were doing or something we watched cause there’s been plenty times of that xD

51. current stresses?

Homework vs free time e-e

52. favorite font?

I like the gothic looking ones but it’s usually not practical to use so idk

53. what is the current state of your hands?

My hands...? They’re fine ??

54. what did you learn from your first job?

How to care for babies and little kids, how to put on a diaper lol

56. favorite tradition?

I can’t remember a particular one off hand but I’m trying to start few new ones like decorating cookies for Halloween uwu

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

Uhhhhh like personally or...? Cause we’ve overcome homelessness before, um finishing assignments idk😭 oh maybe bullying?? That’s all I can think of since I still struggle with a lot,,

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

Alright let’s do thisss: creativity (mostly in writing sense), I can bake/cook, I have amazing organization skills and many work places have used that lol (bonus is I don’t mind, I actually really enjoy it, very peaceful), surprisingly good balance all things considered, I’m a quick learner

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

“I’m too tired for this.”

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

Good question good question🤔 I don’t think I’d last in any of them/have a terrible side character role so 💀

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

“Life’s too short to hold grudges.”

62. seven characters you relate to?

Dude this is gonna get embarrassing I can feel it🤠

Itaru, Iori, Sogo, Belle, Simeon (obey me), Nozaki (he’s clueless about romance irl and doesn’t know when someone has a crush on him yet can write romance well enough and yeah it’s me lol), and uhh Swindler/Ordinary Person in Akudama Drive (still can’t believe no one really has names in that anime but the way she gets wrapped in everything felt like something that’d happen to me lol)

63. five songs that would play in your club?

Like nightclub...? I’m skipping this ajdbd

64. favorite website from your childhood?

Probably the Barbie site, me and my sister played all the dress up games almost daily istg

65. any permanent scars?

Appendectomy scars and then looks like I have one on a toe but it’s possible it still might heal...

66. favorite flower(s)?

Nightshade, foxglove, baby’s breath, bellflowers, roses

67. good luck charms?

I don’t think I have any...

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

Lemon

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

Let me think...I read something once about flowers having ears(?) but like not ear ears just something about having a part that picks up sound waves

70. left or right handed?

Right

71. least favorite pattern?

Lolll animal print I think

72. worst subject?

Physics...the worst science

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

6...?

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

I don’t remember, it probably happened when i was 6. I do remember losing one of my front teeth during my birthday one year and I was happy since the tooth had been loose for some time xD

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

Chips I guess or just like fried in skillet

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

A succulent probably

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

Neither ew

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

They are both about equally terrible

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

Earth

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

Fireflies

82. pc or console?

I am on pc side now

83. writing or drawing?

Writing

84. podcasts or talk radio?

Podcasts I guess

84. barbie or polly pocket?

Barbie

85. fairy tales or mythology?

Mythology, it’s too fun and chaotic lol

86. cookies or cupcakes?

Hm...cupcakes

87. your greatest fear?

Uh,,,I don’t have many fears but I guess one would be falling from a great height? So I would get scared of crossing a bridge and it collapsing or riding a plane and it falling easily

88. your greatest wish?

World peace🥲

89. who would you put before everyone else?

My mom maybe...?

90. luckiest mistake?

I honestly don’t remember but something I do remember is I out semicolon instead of period and turned out to be correct grammar lol

91. boxes or bags?

Boxes

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?

Sunlight or fairy lights, I don’t require much either way and prefer more natural lighting

93. nicknames?

Lassie, twinkle toes, Ash, poody butt (by 3 yr old I sometimes watch and play with lol he means it affectionately; I call him monkey butt and it’s catching on slowly instead)

94. favorite season?

Starting to be fall just a little more but I like transition times most

95. favorite app on your phone?

Let’s go with twitter

96. desktop background?

It is a moriarty and gang pic

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

2: mine and my moms

98. favorite historical era?

Ooo tough one but I’ll say renaissance as some of the coolest things came from that time

[joheun-saram]

To Make a Power Couple (knj) | 04

Chapter 4: Cigarette Confetti

previous | masterlist | next

Summary- Y/N and Namjoon get closer as their relationship develops. Also, Y/N suddenly gets too many instagram followers

word count- 8.6k

pairing- idol!namjoon x ceo!reader

rating- R

genre- series, slow burn, fluff, smut, strangers2lovers

warnings- unwanted sexual advances, discussion of mindset post unwanted advances, alcohol consumption, oral sex (m. receiving), hickeys

a.n- okay so this chapter is finally done! Thank you for your patience!! It took me a long time to write the scene with Mr Li because I had to pull from my own experience and that was uncomfy - but I hope you like it. Also, there’s a time skip so keep an eye out for that. Also also, can I just say I love writing this character of Namjoon lol this character is my ideal boyfriend material LMFAO.

Hey Alexa, can you fall in love with your own fictional character? Asking for a friend. Thanks.

Feedback much appreciated! 💕

taglist - @beach-bitch-bitch-beach​, @sassyuniversitytacopeanut​, @rjsmochii​, @jinjccns, @joyful-jimin

-

Good morning, Y/N. Today you have four appointments on your calendar. Your first three appointments are as follows. At 7:30am, you have “Morning stand up with Harry (Cancelled)”, at 12:00pm, you have “Jiyoung Gala Update Lunch”, at 2:00pm, you have “Quarterly Sales Meeting”. The weather in Seoul today is 24 degrees and cloudy. Playing BTS on Spotify.

Namjoon wakes up with a start, Jimin’s airy vocals flowing through the room. He’s confused as to why someone in the dorm was playing their old album. About to scream at whoever (probably Taehyung) was playing the music, he opens his eyes to find your face next to his. It takes him a few seconds to realize where he is, and his face breaks into a goofy grin as he recalls the events of the night before. His arm was numb where you lay on it, your arms around his waist, legs tangled together and he traced his fingers on your side in an effort to wake you up.

He could see you stir as you groggily opened your eyes, looking up at him with a smile that made his heart race. He reached to stroke your face, as you hummed an apology and politely asked your alarm to be quiet. Seems that you were nice even to your robots.

“Sorry about that. Work day, you know?” you shrugged as you snuggled closer. Namjoon couldn’t help chuckle as you yawned into his bare chest that erupted in goosebumps at the sensation. He gently pulled your chin towards him to kiss you good morning. Your face was puffy with sleep, your cheeks squished where they lay on the pillows, and watching you was so adorable that he wanted to wake up next to you everyday. 

“You play my music in the morning?” He was elated. Just like the night you met when you accidentally sang him his song, he felt his heart soar. The fact that you woke up everyday to the words he wrote made him not only happy but oddly motivated. It was like he wanted to just run out of bed and write another album so you could have more music to wake up to. 

He watched your face turn red at his comment and he couldn’t help but capture your lips in another lazy kiss, his hand soothingly circling your back under your t-shirt, well, his t-shirt. He wanted you to know that there was nothing to be embarrassed by. If only you knew how his heart raced at the discovery.

“That… that’s for research… you know to get to know you?” you were stumbling over your words and he couldn’t help but pull you closer. You were so cute when you were bashful.

“Mhmm... sure...” He hummed, amused. Hey, just because he didn’t want you to feel awkward doesn’t mean that he couldn’t still tease you. 

“Okay fine. I like your music okay? You’ve converted me to your cult.” You huffed, pouting your lips, and Namjoon burst out laughing.

“What’s your favourite song?”

“Is this a test?” You looked incredulous, as you looked up at him from the crook of his shoulder. Your hands were resting on his chest, and everywhere your fingers traced their aimless patterns left behind warmth under his skin.

“Hmm.. yes. You better get it right.” It wasn’t really a test, but Namjoon would be lying if he said he wasn’t incredibly curious as to which song caught your eye.

“Can I google it?”

“Wait… you’re gonna google… what your favourite song is?” He had not expected this answer. He felt himself deflate a little, his smiling falling. He supposed you were a new fan, maybe you didn’t remember the title and wanted to look up the lyrics, but you could just ask him, he’d know better than google, surely.

“Yes. I’m gonna google which song you didn’t write and say that one cause your ego is getting too big for this bed.” You booped his nose as you burst out laughing, and he couldn’t stop himself from joining along, his earlier worries disappearing. You always surprised him, and it makes him crave what you’ll say next.

“You’re so evil!” he teased as he tickled your sides, making you laugh and roll around your bed. After a few minutes of your protests, he stopped, now positioned over you. Your eyes were beautiful as they look up at his, tears of mirth lining the corners and breathless from your laughter, and he couldn’t help but kiss you again, molding his lips to your soft ones. He loved that your arms automatically went around his waist as you pulled him closer and deepen the kiss, tracing your tongue with his. He kissed you like that for a few minutes, just relishing being in your presence. Your hands were resting on his chest now, thumbs grazing his nipples, making him shudder. It’s like everytime he kissed you, you put him under a spell and he wanted nothing more than to consume you. How was it that you smell like vanilla and flowers even in the morning? Did you just naturally smell like a fresh garden?

“Good morning” He whispered between his kisses, gazing at you softly.

“Good morning” you responded before closing the distance again and kissing him with passion. He could get used to this.

His hand moved under your shirt to cup your chest, rolling your nipple playfully as he continued to kiss you. Your moan went straight from your lips to his dick as he couldn’t help but roll his hips against yours, craving the friction. Your hands went from his chest to palming him over his boxers and the touch made him groan. He was so incredibly turned on and you had barely even touched him. You were going to be the death of him. 

He let you carry on your ministrations as he kissed your neck, enjoying your mewls as he reached what he has realized is your sensitive spot, right where your neck meets your shoulder. He could see the marks he left last night and couldn’t help the pride swelling in his chest. He shouldn’t be so turned on by the bruises he left, but he can’t help his kinks. It proved to him that he didn’t imagine last night.

He was slightly taken aback as you slipped your hand in his underwear and started stroking him. He moaned against your neck as pleasure shot through him. 

“Want to make you feel good.” you murmured next to his ear, your kisses on his neck making him flush. “Lay back…” He wanted to let you but he wanted to make you feel good first, hear you screaming his name as he made you come undone. He one upped you by placing his own hand in your panties, groaning at how wet you were for him.

“You first.” He said, more sternly than he intended but he didn’t notice as you rut your hips against his hand. Your hand didn’t stopped stroking him and if he was honest it was making him lose his concentration. He removed his hand from your underwear, ignoring your whines, as he stilled your hand, pinning it over your head.

“No… I wanna taste you… Please?” You looked at him with your eyes wide and he was powerless to your pleading. He held his ground though, not letting you take control. Not until you mewled another please and pushed against his chest. He laid back against the pillows as you straddled him, kissing him deeply before making your way down his body. You kissed his chest leaving a light mark near his heart that made him sigh. He was sure that mark was deeper than it looks as his heart beat faster the closer you get to his dick. You kissed his belly before kissing down his clothed length making him groan deeply.

“Baby, stop teasing before I make you stop.” He was testing the waters, grinning when he saw you sit up immediately, biting your lip before pulling his boxers down to his thighs, following his orders. He hissed as you kissed his throbbing head, before immediately taking him in your mouth. It felt unbelievably good, your soft tongue lapping at his length as your cheeks hollow. He couldn’t take his eyes off you and almost lost it when you looked straight in his eyes, taking him as deep as you can. You moaned around him and the sensation made heat travel through his body. His hand found purchase in your hair as you bobbed on him, making him grunt loudly, losing his senses as he guided your head at a pace of his liking.

“Stop Y/N… stop… I’m gonna cum…” He moaned as he pulled your hair, a little too aggressively, making you whine around him. You released him with a loud pop.

“Cum in my mouth, baby” you were smirking at him as if you knew the effect you were having on him. Of course you knew, it was obvious by how loud he was breathing. His cock twitched in your hand at your comment, and he decided to let you have your fun, mentally noting to make you beg for him next time. 

“Oh fuck… You’re so good to me baby” he panted as you once again started sucking him off. You were more enthusiastic this time, the sounds of your mouth ricocheting off the walls as you sucked him while your hand played with his balls, cupping them, making him see stars. He couldn’t take it anymore and with a loud grunt, he announced his end and felt his balls draining into your mouth. He watched from under his arm that rested on top of his face as you swallowed him, licking the remains off him as if he was the best popsicle you’ve tasted. It made him lose his mind, the sight making him moan softly.

You made your way back to him and as you laid on the pillows with a satisfied grin, he kissed you slowly, making sure you could feel his gratitude for what may have been the best blowjob he’s experienced.

“Sorry if I pulled your hair too hard.” He apologized as he stroked your head gently, one hand cupping your face.

“Don’t worry about it. I like it rough.” Although he had literally just cum, he felt the blood rush downwards again at your words.

“Fuck… You’re gonna kill me, you know?” He said as he kissed you again, fiercely, his hands ripping your panties off, relishing your gasp. He was determined to make you cum.

And he did, twice, once in bed and once in the shower. 

As you were getting dressed in front of the mirror in your closet, he heard you gasp.

“Oh my god Joon! What the fuck?” Worriedly, he entered the closet, his jeans half undone and looked at you dressed in your pants and bra staring at yourself.

“What’s wrong, baby?” He asked, as he moved closer to you.

“You animal! There’s like no concealer in the world to cover these!” You frowned, your mouth turning into a cute pout as you poke the hickeys that litter your neck and chest. He couldn’t help but smile at his handiwork as he hugged your waist from behind placing his head on your shoulder and kissing the mark on your neck.

“I’m sorry baby” His face however has no trace of apology as he grinned against your skin, feeling the blush that started at your neck.

“Fuck… I hate turtlenecks” you turned around in his arms, your hands going around his neck as you pouted at him exaggeratedly, and he wanted to go for another round. The power you had over him was overwhelming. 

“I bet you look really good in a turtleneck.” He captured your lips in a soft kiss, smiling against your lips. He knew both of you had to get back to the real world soon but he just wanted to hole up in your room all day, all week, all year, just ravishing you.

You were interrupted by your phone ringing as you answered it on a speaker that rings through somewhere in your closet. He really has to ask you how many speakers you have in this place sometime.

“Hi, this is Y/N.” You spoke, your voice cold and formal and he was kind of taken aback by the change of your tone as you pushed his lips off your shoulder gently, still encircled in each other’s arms.

“Y/N! Are you okay? It’s 7:25… You’re never late!” He heard a familiar voice through the speaker although he couldn’t quite place it.

“Sorry Siwon! I’m feeling a bit unwell. I’m going to work from home this morning. I’ll come by around lunch for the meeting with Jiyoung though!” He brightened up at that comment, his grip around your waist tightening at the prospect of more time with you. 

“Sick? Sure, sure… Tell Namjoon I said hi!” He watched your jaw drop as you awkwardly started coughing involuntarily. He kneould he shouldn’t but he can’t help tease you as a “Hey, man” escaped his lips, making you swat at him, signalling him to shut up.

“Oh shit. Am I on speaker?” Siwon audibly gasped into the phone and Namjoon burst out laughing, enjoying your reaction as you quickly bid goodbye.

“Okay, no coffee for you!” You huffed as you put on a t-shirt and make your way to the kitchen.

“Aww… babe!” Namjoon whined as he followed you, tugging his own shirt on to find you pouring steaming coffee into your mug. “Wait how did you make that so quick?”

He watched you smirk as you sipped on your coffee, making a show of how delicious it was, before you relented and pour him one.

“Magic.” You said smugly and he made a mental note to get you to teach him your tricks for his own house.

After breakfast, you spent the morning snuggling on the couch and reading the news, the easy domesticity of the moment not lost on Namjoon. Usually he wouldn’t even stay the night, but it seems like you made him break all the rules without even trying. He wondered why that was, why he was so drawn to you in such a short time. No one he had been with in the past made him feel this way, at least not only a week into knowing them.

“What are you thinking about?” you broke him out of his reverie. He hadn’t realized he’d been staring across the room. He didn’t know how much time had passed.

“This…” He gestured between the two of you, watching your eyes follow his hand from where your head rested against his chest.

“What? You’ve never read the news before?” You pointed at the iPad that the two you were meant to be reading from.

“You know what I mean…” He trailed off rubbing his neck, unsure why he even began the conversation. He should’ve just lied and said something funny.

“Sorry… I tend to use humour when I’m uncomfortable...” You got up from where you were leaning against him to sit upright on the couch, gaze averted. 

“You’re uncomfortable?” His eyes widened as he tried to figure out why. Sure this all seemed to move way too fast, but you seemed to have found a rhythm with him this morning. He was slightly panicked that he had misread that. The thought that being around him made you uncomfortable made his heart drop to his knees.

“No… and that makes me uncomfortable” He watched you as you fiddled with the rips in your jeans. Your answer made him relax, pushing aside some of his worries. Knowing that he wasn’t the only one feeling lost with this new found comfort was oddly calming.

“I know what you mean. This seems… too easy, right?” He reached over to stop your fidgeting hands.

“Yeah… but I’m no expert. My last relationship was like three years ago” You shrugged. 

“What happened? I mean… if you want to tell me” 

“Yeah… it just didn’t work out. I was too busy for him sometimes and he couldn’t understand. He blamed me for not prioritizing our relationship. I was just starting out though… it was… hard” Your smiled at him sheepishly, a little melancholy behind your eyes, that made him want to hug it away.

“I get that. I had a lot of relationships that ended up the same way.” He thought about all his past partners, all the fights that led to nowhere because he couldn’t find time in his schedule to even resolve them. All the times he would receive an angry text and not be able to respond till hours later which only exacerbated the problems. All his exes that told him he was too self-centered, too narcissistic for focusing on his career, and for a long time he believed them, the guilt kept him up nights on end.

“Koren dating is also harder than Canadian dating,” you joked. He could sense you were trying to lighten the mood again, and he intertwined your fingers where they rested on your knee, before playing along.

“Wow… did you just stereotype my entire country?” 

“Oops?” You chuckled lightly, your eyes brightening as you shrugged. “What about your last relationship?”

“It was about a year ago. We worked together, but we didn’t work together. There wasn’t really a reason. It just kind of… fizzled out. Although I think I was to blame.” He didn’t know how you’d react to this and he rubbed his neck nervously.

“Why do you say that?” You leaned closer, and he could surprisingly feel his nerves melting away at your proximity.

“I just would forget to keep her updated on my life. I know it sounds terrible.”

“Nah. It just sounds human. You weren’t in love.” His eyes widened at your response. He knew now that what he felt then wasn’t love but in the moment he had thought she was the one. Well, until she wasn’t.

“I thought I was” He admitted with a shrug.

“I don’t think you’d forget her if you were.” You were looking at him now, smiling slightly, your eyes shining as your thumb rubbed soothing circles on his. Somehow again, you had managed to sound poetic without meaning to - he didn’t know how you managed to do that so easily.

“I guess you’re right. Fuck… this is weird.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m not usually this honest.” 

“Wow. Must be the veritaserum I slipped in your drink.” You laughed as you reached to gently put your hand on his shoulder. He enjoyed the touch, it somehow made him feel safe. Safe to share his secrets.

“Is that a Harry Potter reference, you dork?” He could feel the mood lightening again and he realized that your ability to seamlessly switch from uncomfortable topics to humour was at least a part of the reason he felt so comfortable in your presence.

“I’m glad you trust me enough to be honest.” Your hand moved from his shoulder to rest against his cheek, and he couldn’t help but lean into it.

“Honestly, I think it’s because of you.” He watched your face turn to confusion, so he continued. ”You being so upfront makes me wanna do the same. Why are you so honest with me?”

“Because there’s no reason for us to continue this if we can’t be honest.” You smiled softly as you shrugged lightly, still stroking his cheek, and he felt his heart fill with warmth. “I’ve spent too much of my life pretending to be someone else for people to like me. So I’m testing my theory. If I’m honest with you and you like me, maybe this thing is worth it.”

“I do like you.” He really did. He hadn’t felt this strong a connection in a while. Someone who understood him without pretending to, or trying to appease him. Someone he could talk about the good and bad without judgement.

“You haven’t seen all the warts yet.” You averted your gaze, and he couldn’t help but cup your face and make you look at him.

“I’ve seen you naked, you don’t have any warts.” He tried your approach at humour as he kissed you on the nose.

“You are so cheesy!” You swat at him gently before kissing him lightly on the lips. He felt his heart skip a beat at the small gesture. “But seriously, thank you for being so open with me.” You looked at him adoringly, and he mirrored you.

He kissed you at that. Both of you enjoying the chaste kiss without deepening it. The conversation helped you both feel less uncomfortable with the comfortable.

His phone rang, interrupting the sweet moment, his manager asking where to send the car so he wouldn’t be late for the meeting that morning. Before leaving, you made plans to meet up again that weekend, and Namjoon felt that three days was too long without seeing you. He didn’t know why, but he hadn’t even left your apartment yet and he already missed you.

----------------------------------------

When you reached the restaurant for lunch with Jiyoung that afternoon, you still had a smile on your face. It seemed to have been permanently etched on your face since Namjoon left. You thought about your date and how it seemed to have been a thousand dates rolled into one. It felt like you’ve known him forever, and barring from Jiyoung, you hadn’t felt that way about a person before. Someone you connected with instantly, someone whose presence made you immediately calmer. He seemed to have crashed all the walls around you in a very short time and although that thought should scare you, it instead made you excited.

Spotting Jiyoung at a table you made your way across the restaurant to her, greeting her and the server, an old woman in her 60s, most likely the owner, that seemed to have appeared out of thin air. After ordering your entrees, your best friend and PR manager jumped right into business.

“So you’re famous. Congrats!” She did a little dance as she announced the news.

“What?” You were confused. Last you checked you had 2000 followers on your social media, which was run by Jiyoung and Siwon, on account of you being a “boomer” - their words, not yours.

“After the gala, a couple of magazines, courtesy of me, decided to do a piece on you. So congrats on your 200k followers!” She seemed giddy, excitedly jumping up and down as she clapped along. That was quite a follower growth and it led to her going into a twenty minute strategy talk on how to leverage your personal brand for the company. You were glad that she was excited, but if you were being honest you hated the limelight. The idea that someone’s “fame” could be decided by the number of likes of a photo posing at a restaurant made your skin crawl.

“Okay so we’re going to schedule a photoshoot sometime in the next two weeks and take a few photos for the next few months of uploads. Of course, make sure to take photos every time you go somewhere fun too, like I don’t know, one of your concerts you’re obsessed with or art galleries.” Jiyoung continued regardless of your groans.

“Do I have to?” You truly did not have time for this, your schedule is already overflowing. The whole idea of curating a feed made you feel stressed.

“Yes. It’s the game, Y/N. You have to play it” She replied sagely, as she slurped her noodles.

“You know all the photos will be of me holed up at the office. I’m not that interesting...” You played with your food as you pouted. Your comment wasn’t born out of low self-esteem, it’s just what you believed. Regardless of the media perceptions of the glamorous life of a CEO, you knew that at the end of the day most you did was sleep, attend meetings, and drink copious amounts of coffee. Occasionally you dabbled in your hobbies, but with the company and non-profit growing at the speed they were, there was barely any time for that. You doubted you’d be able to enjoy any of the fun till after quite a few more years when the title will become less heavy and you’d have more help.

“Don’t be stupid! You, my friend, are a young, fun, single woman! The world deserves to be envious of it!” Jiyoung dismissed you easily, shaking her hand at your protests. “Speaking of fun, let’s go clubbing Saturday, it’s been too long since you got laid.”

As soon as she finished her sentence you felt heat rise up your face, unconsciously bringing your hand up to your turtleneck covered neck. To make matters worse, your throat also decided now to work at that moment, making you choke on your rice.

“Oh my god! You minx! You got laid didn’t you?” Jiyoung loudly exclaimed, much to your dismay and of the other patrons who seemed peeved at hearing your bedroom adventures while they ate lunch.

“Please stop…” You looked around awkwardly apologizing to the old man next to you who looked at you with disgust. Great!

“Who was it? Where did you meet? Tinder? Did you go to a club without me? Was it a client?” The questions were endless.

“If I tell you, you can’t tell anyone, not a soul.” You were going to regret this, you knew it, but you’d be lying if it didn’t excite you to share the news with Jiyoung. She was your favourite female friend and even though on the outside, your friendship may seem mismatched to some, she truly understood you better than most people. She had been there when your last relationship ended, coaxing you back to your feet after weeks of self-destruction. You trusted her.

“Did you sleep with a married man?” She whispered, thankfully finally aware that you two were in the middle of a popular restaurant during peak lunch hours.

“Umm… no. Do you remember Namjoon from the party?” Namjoon from the party? Good job, real subtle Y/N.

“Namjoon?” You watched as realization dawned on her face, her face going from being scrunched in confusion, to wide eyed surprise, to what it is now; a smug smile. “I was wondering why your Spotify showed you suddenly listening to BTS…”

“Okay you can’t make fun of that too!” you whined, your morning faux pas still too fresh in your mind, as you buried your face in your hands. 

“He made fun of you?” Jiyoung was cackling, before she started digging for details. “Man after my own soul! So was he good? When are you seeing him again? Are you dating him? Oh my god this is so exciting!” She is fully squealing and slapping your arm, making you wince.

“He was… amazing” you tell her your face flaring at the memories of last night. “And we’re going on another date.”

“Ooo date number two!”

“Well… technically four if you count the party?”

“Okay. What the fuck? You’ve been holding out on me! Spill!”

And so you do, sharing your interactions with Namjoon over the past week. It felt nice to reminisce about them, even though it was not that long ago. You were so into him, it was worrying. You were beyond excited to see him again, but your last conversation still weighed in your head. He was right. It just felt too easy, how you had met, and seemingly couldn’t get enough of each other. You were suspicious.

“Stop overthinking this, Y/N. It’s good that things are easy! You deserve easy!” Jiyoung cut through your rant. You had almost forgotten that you were speaking out loud.

“It’s not just me, he feels the same way.” You pouted, trying to defend your stance.

“Then you both belong together with your stupid ass overthinking.”

--------------------------------------------------

Y/N: Thanks for dinner tonight. I had a really good time.

Namjoon: Me too!

Namjoon: Speaking of, when can I see you again?

Y/N: Wow. We’ve barely digested our food, Joon

Namjoon: You’re mean! I just like hanging out with you

Y/N: I’m kidding! Tuesday?

Namjoon: Suddenly I love Tuesdays

Y/N: Shut up you dork!

Namjoon: Says the girl obsessed with Batman

--------------------------------------------------

Y/N: What the hell! How do you do photoshoots all the time. This is CRINGE.

Namjoon: Is that today? Yes! SEND ME THE PICTURES!!!!

Y/N: Fuck no. These are so awkward!

Namjoon: Come on! Send! I bet you look hot ;)

Y/N: Nope. Never. Never. NEVER.

Namjoon: I’ll just text Jiyoung for them

Y/N: You don’t even have her number

Y/N: Do you?

Y/N: KIM NAMJOON ANSWER ME

--------------------------------------------------

Namjoon: Did I leave my phone at your place last night?

Y/N: I don't think so

Namjoon: I can’t believe I lost my phone again!!!

Y/N: Wait how are you texting me right now?

Namjoon: … nvm

Y/N: Omg. You're an idiot.

--------------------------------------------------

Y/N: Okay that hike was harder than you said it’d be!

Y/N: I’m dying :(

Namjoon: Aw baby. I’m sorry!

Y/N: You owe me. You’re paying for my masseuse

Namjoon: Why pay for one when I’m better than any you’ll ever get?

--------------------------------------------------

Y/N: I miss you :(

Namjoon: I miss you too

Y/N: Come over?

Namjoon: I have to wake up at 6 for a shoot :(

Y/N: I wake up at 6 every day

Namjoon: On my way

--------------------------------------------------

Namjoon: How’s work going?

Y/N: Terrible :) I hate my life :)

Namjoon: You’re scary when you send emojis like that

Y/N: Wow. Thank you. You’re so nice to me.

Namjoon: Sorry!

Namjoon: What’s stressing you?

Y/N: Just deadlines… SO MANY DEADLINES

Namjoon: Aw baby. Have you eaten? I can come by with food

Y/N: Aren’t you busy? You have your comeback in a few months

Namjoon: Nah. I got the rest of the day off

Y/N: That’s… suspicious... Why?

Namjoon: I’m at the hospital

Y/N: WTF. I’m calling. Pick up.

--------------------------------------------------

You checked yourself out in the reflective elevator doors, as you helped Harry adjust his tie, while Siwon rattled on about the restaurant you were headed to. Harry and you had been dodging your “celebratory” drinks with Mr Li for over a month and a half since the meeting where he signed the contract. He finally trapped you both during a networking event last week and had you set the date. To say you were both very much not looking forward to this evening would be an understatement. It took every ounce of willpower in you to stay as you made your way to your private table at the high end Japanese restaurant.

Mr Li, as per usual, was late to the dinner he had forced upon you. Sitting next to Harry, you both tried to devise a plan to escape as soon as possible. As soon as dinner ended, Harry was going to pretend that Jen was ill and since he was your ride back, you both had no choice but to “begrudgingly” end the night. The idea was foolproof, or so the both of you thought.

Here is a list of reasons why it was not foolproof. 

One, upon arrival, Mr Li ordered shots for the table and after Harry used the excuse that he was driving you both home (you wanted to set it up so it wouldn’t be a surprise as you left), Mr Li got excited that you would be his new drinking buddy. He poured shot after shot, even after you mentioned that you were going to get a drink - hoping to rely on your ice tea in a whiskey glass trick - he refused to let you not drink anything other than shots of sake. Usually, you wouldn’t let someone dictate your drinking but you didn’t want to seem rude, and so you played along till you felt much too tipsy.

Two, Mr Li requested your server to stagger the dinner courses since it was a “night of partying” and as the third course of sashimi was served, he took the liberty of sitting next to you because apparently your fish looked fresher. He then proceeded to steal from your plate while making uncomfortable eye contact with you and putting his gross hands on your thigh. When you removed his hand from your thigh he had the audacity to suggest that you were playing hard to get. The urge to vomit had never been stronger.

Three, and this is where everything falls apart. When at the end of dinner, the lovely Jen calls to bail you and Harry out, Mr Li insists that Harry drives back alone and that he drives you home. Somehow, you both had not thought of this very basic flaw in your plan. With you running out of excuses, it was soon evident that you had no choice but to stay. You knew Harry, and you knew that he would call no less than ten minutes later with an emergency on your own or get Siwon out of bed to run to you. He would rescue you, you had faith. In the meantime you had to endure a drunk Mr Li trying to hit on you.

Time seemed to move slow as he drunkenly asked you if you had a boyfriend. Knowing his misogynistic self, you should’ve lied and said yes, the only thing he would probably understand would be that another man had a claim on you, but your tipsy self thought honesty was the best policy. As soon as you said no, it seemed that he took it as an invite, pulling you into an awkward hug, grabbing at your ass, trying to lift you to his seat. His movements were so swift that it left you momentarily paralyzed. You felt ice in your veins as the intense feeling of your personal space being so blatantly violated took over you. It felt as if a million ants were crawling under your skin, your stomach turning. You tried to get out of his grip but it was too strong, as he continued to massage your behind. You felt trapped, your mouth running dry, as anger took over. You were done being polite.

With a strong shove, you stood up from your seat and grabbed your jacket as you looked at him straight in the eye, hoping your glare was enough to get the message across. It was not.

“Come on Y/N. I signed such a big contract for you the least you could do is suck me off.” He stared at you sleazily, the liver spot above his eyebrow moving up and down as he wagged them.

“I’m sorry Mr Li, but this is very inappropriate. I’m going to leave.” You were nicer than your instincts were telling you to be. If he wasn’t your client, you would have already kicked him in the balls or better yet broken his nose, although knowing this creep, he’d probably have a kink for it.

“You’re a fucking bitch you know that?” He spat, his words filled with venom.

“Excuse me?” Each moment that you stayed in this room, made you angrier, the rage pumping itself through you, ringing in your ears.

“You think you’re successful because you’re smart? Don’t kid yourself, Y/N. Everyone knows that your clients only sign because they think you’ll fuck them.” He scoffed.

You knew if you stayed there longer, you would surely ruin this contract for your company, if not get sued for punching his ugly little face in so you grabbed your phone and bag and made your way out of the restaurant, tossing a curt goodbye his way.

Your vision was dark as you made your way through the streets. You were so enraged you were shaking. You knew what would fix this. Cigarettes. Without a second thought you made your way into the nearest convenience store, grabbing a bottle of soju and a pack, before walking to your favourite place - the rooftop of your office building.

--------------------------------------------------

You sat at the roof, contemplating the earlier events, the cigarette pack in hand. You hated how you felt in this moment. Powerless. There was no other word for it. You hated feeling small and insignificant. You had built your life up in a way that ensured you wouldn’t have to deal with these feelings but here you were at almost midnight, searching the faint stars in the sky for serenity. 

Anger coursed through your veins as you tried to steel yourself, fists clenching hard enough for red semicircles to be engraved on your palms. Sometimes you hated being a woman. What gave anyone the right to dismiss your hard work and accomplishments because they valued your tits more. You were coursing with negativity, your mouth tasting of poison, as you chugged the soju. You still felt his slimy hands on your ass and his words echoed through your mind. If only your deal was not at stake you would’ve kicked him so hard in the balls, he’d never be able to reproduce. The world is much too beautiful to have his offsprings tainting it. 

You usually don’t let these things affect you as much. It’d be a lie to say these moments were few and far in between. In fact, they took place more often than you’d like to remember. The amount of men who had dismissed you or called you being a CEO a great “marketing move in today’s PC world” was astronomical. You would usually brush them off and pretend they never happened, never letting it affect you, but something about the way he sneered made you so vulnerable that for a minute you let your guard down and believed him. 

“You think you’re successful because you’re smart? Don’t kid yourself, Y/N. Everyone knows that your clients only sign because they think you’ll fuck them.” You snapped a cigarette in half, watching the contents sprinkle out of the white casing as you rolled it in your fingers and coaxed a bigger mess. You tossed it across the floor, watching the wind pick up the light scraps and scatter them around like confetti. What a great celebration, you thought as you rolled your eyes.

“Y/N…?” you heard Namjoon call from behind you. 

You regretted messaging him after your dinner. You didn’t even know why you had told him. He was not your boyfriend, technically he wasn’t even your friend. You had only gone on a few dates, and although you felt closer to him than you had anybody you had dated in a long while, you were not ready for him to see you this way. It had barely been over a month and a half. You didn’t feel confident enough to face him. The Y/N he knew was the successful, flirty, witty version you had worked hard to portray. You don’t know how he would react to this self-hating mess of you. Maybe he’d run away. You deserved that much. Hell, maybe he didn’t even buy the version you showed him, only here for the tits. You were bitter.

“I’m sorry you came all this way. I’m fine, you can go home.” You couldn’t face him - not in this state. You stared at your hands, deepening the crescents on your palm as if willing the skin to break. You saw his shoes in front of you, unlaced blue Nikes, attached to blue striped pajama pants with cartoon koalas. Had you forced him to get out of bed? You felt a bubble of guilt rise within your chest. You were such a shitty person to bring him into this. He deserved better than to be on a cold rooftop on a Friday night in the middle of his comeback preparations.

You were ready to ask him leave again as you heard him settle next to you. You looked up at his face, his eyes softened with concern behind his wide rimmed glasses as he sat crossed leg, his hands in his lap. You opened the pack to grab another cigarette, snapping it in half again and tossing it half heartedly across the floor. You felt defeated, the emotional exhaustion of the night weighing on your shoulders.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked softly, his voice almost a whisper.

“I don’t know,” you said, matching his volume. There was no one here and it’s not like anyone could hear you off of this fifty storey building, but somehow you only had the strength to whisper. 

“Take your time” he answered. He looked like he meant it. He sat there looking at you, giving you space. His phone buzzed a few times and he ignored it. Instead, he just patiently looked at you, his face neutral for what felt like hours.

Somehow his patience gave you courage to open up, and you told him the events of the night. He never interrupted, or even moved. The only way you’d know he was not suddenly a statue was by the way his jaw slowly tensed as you got to the reason you were so upset, all your doubts and insecurities filling the air in a tumble of fast spoken words.

“I don’t even know why this is making me so angry. It is not like this is the first time this has happened to me.” You chuckled dryly as you looked up at him. He looked angry and you felt nervous. Perhaps you shared too much. You wouldn’t blame him for getting angry at how stupid your reason was for getting him out of bed.

“What’s his name?” he asked, his eyes narrowed. You were surprised at his question. This was the first time he spoke since you started talking about twenty minutes ago.

“Why?”

“I’m going to kill him.” He said flatly, eye ablaze and jaw set.

“Joon…” you trailed, unsure what to say. He wasn’t unjustified in his threat. On your way to the roof, you yourself had devised about a thousand ways to get away with murder.

“No. He’s an asshole and I’m going to kill him for making you feel this way.” He looked less angry now, and more upset, sighing as he looked at you. You chuckled humorlessly. His comment made you feel better, made you feel less alone and stupid for wanting to take your anger out at the perpetuator. At least you’d have someone to carry the body with if you decided to act on your homicidal fantasies.

“Can I give you a hug?” He asked tentatively, his hand reached towards you as he turned looking at you closely. as if worried you might snap at him.

“Joon, you don’t have to ask,” you murmured as you scooted closer to him, wrapping your arms around his waist. He reacted immediately, pulling you into him tightly, his chin over your head. Your face was pressed against his chest and you inhaled his woodsy scent, feeling instantly more calm.

“I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable. A man touched you without your permission and I didn’t know how you felt about being close to another today.” He whispered against your hair, kissing the top of your head. Your heart instantly warmed, tears pricking your eyes. No one had ever been this considerate to you before, so respectful. The fact that he thought you might feel uncomfortable around him just because of that asshole made your heart break. You pushed out of the hug and cupped his face.

“Don’t you dare compare yourself to that asshole.” You were angry that not only did that sorry excuse for a man made you feel small, he made Namjoon feel like you wouldn’t want him.

“And don’t you dare feel like you’re not worthy because of that asshole.” He kissed your forehead gently before bringing you into another bone-crushing hug, momentarily knocking the air out of your lungs. His words made you feel warm, and brought a lump to your throat. It felt oddly cathartic to have the man you had come to admire tell you you were enough. You felt the tears you had been holding in all night escape slowly. You held him tighter as his t-shirt became your makeshift tissue, silently crying for what felt like hours while he stroked your hair gently.

When you could talk again without your voice breaking, you broke the embrace. His shirt was stained with your tears and mascara, and suddenly you felt very awkward for your blatant display of emotions. 

“I’m sorry I called you here so late,” you apologized sheepishly, realizing how late it was and how silly you felt for making him jump out of bed.

“Please don’t apologize. I’m glad you called me.” He wiped your face of the tears that had failed to be absorbed by the t-shirt, smiling slightly as he leaned in to give you another peck on your forehead. 

“You’re in your pajamas,” you pointed out, laughing slightly, wanting to remove some of the awkwardness you felt at having bawled in front of him for so long.

“I didn’t want to keep you waiting for too long.” He shrugged, giving you a smile that melted your heart. You had realized this before but it dawned on you again that to you Namjoon was comfort. He was like a warm blanket to cozy under in a cool room, keeping the monsters at bay.

You reached out and kissed him, slowly pulling him in by his shirt, avoiding his glasses as you tilted your head. The kiss was gentle - it was sweet and warm. Unlike the passionate ones you had shared before, ones that would light you on fire, this was comfortable, like a bonfire rather than a forest fire. His lips were chapped against yours and his tongue tasted like toothpaste as he smiled against your lips.

“You didn’t smoke!” He exclaimed when you separated, pulling you into another hug, his arms around your head. The pride in his voice made you laugh.

“I told you, I don’t smoke anymore,” you commented as you grinned against his chest.

“Then what’s the pack for?” He seemed puzzled.

“Oh… I was going to but I didn’t want to break my two year streak.” You shrugged. He beamed at you as he pulled you in for another kiss, taking his time to taste you. It felt like he was savouring you, his fingers tangled in your hair on the nape of your neck and his other hand placed gently on your waist.

When you came up for air he giggled, his forehead against yours. “I’m proud of you for not breaking your streak,” he said, making your cheeks flare at his sincerity. “Let’s get you home.”

“Do you want to walk instead of grabbing a cab?”

“Always.” He held your hand as you both stand up and make your way downstairs. 

You noticed him shivering slightly as you exited the building and it finally dawned on you that he was dressed in just a t-shirt. It was not the middle of winter but it was certainly too chilly for not wearing a sweater. You couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt in your chest as you were currently dressed in not one but two sweaters. Stopping him, you took off your oversized sweater and handed it to him.

“What are you doing?” He looked at you, confused as you pushed the sweater in his hands.

“You seem cold.”

“That’s supposed to be my move.” He laughed.

“Hey I’m wearing like two sweaters! Plus, I feel bad about dragging you out here and forcing you to walk.” You looked at your shoes, suddenly feeling shy.

“Don’t feel bad, baby.” He lifted your chin up to place a quick peck on your lips after looking around to make sure no one's walking by on the deserted street. “Also, I don’t think this will fit me.” He chuckled, pushing his frames further up his nose.

“It’s oversized! Just try it, you’re shivering!”

“I’m an oversized human!” He exclaimed but started to put his arms through the sleeves. The sweater looked hilariously small on his frame, even with only one sleeve on. As he zipped it up, it resembled a rashguard more than a sweater, his t-shirt flaring out from the bottom, the material straining against his arms and back. The stress of the night washed away as you doubled over in laughter, your face streaking with new joyous tears at the sight. 

“See I told you it was too small!” He grinned sheepishly.

“This is amazing, you look great Joonie” you managed to wheeze out in between your laughter.

At that he took your hand and walked the ten blocks to your apartment. The night was filled with a comfortable silence broken only by little musings as you both took in the quiet surroundings of the financial district after hours. As you neared your street, Namjoon broke the silence once again.

“Why did you message me tonight?” His voice was contemplative, as his thumb grazed yours.

“I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have” You earlier guilt was surfacing again, as you thought about why you told him what happened when usually the first person you’d tell in this situation would be Jiyoung or Harry.

“I told you - I’m glad you did. I was just curious why.”

“I… I don’t know. You’re the first person I wanted to see.” You sighed, getting uncomfortable with the line of questioning. You didn’t want him to ask why he was the first person you thought of because you weren’t ready to be even more vulnerable tonight, not ready to admit the space he had made in your heart over the last month. He was quiet for a few moments, his eyebrows scrunched in concentration as if he were solving a complex math problem, before he spoke.

“Do you remember when I sprained my wrist and had to go to the hospital a few weeks ago?” You didn’t expect this subject change, but gladly welcomed it.

“Yeah…”

“Well… you’re the first person I wanted to see then too. I mean before I knew it was just a sprain and I was panicking.” He squeezed your hand in his as you both exited the elevator on to your hallway, and looked at you, his gaze soft. “What do you think that means?”

“That we’re even?” You smiled, hoping to break this unknown tension that had come between you all of a sudden as you stopped at your door. You fumbled with your keycode, having to enter the password twice before making your way inside, Namjoon following behind you, as you both slipped out of your shoes and into slippers. Before you could leave the entryway, he gently held on your elbow to stop you, fixing you with another one of his soft gazes and a smile that made your heart flutter.

“I was thinking it means that you’re my girlfriend.” You could hear your heart rev up as you looked at him for any signs of teasing. There were none. Usually you would respond back with something along the lines of him never asking, but with the night you had just had all you could think about was how happy you were to finally call him yours. Without further hesitation you wrapped your arms around his neck pulling him into a kiss, which after a little surprise, he returned. It was reminiscent of the first time you had kissed, but this time instead of awkward butterflies, your heart was filled with a comfortable glow. His lips were familiar against yours and his scent wrapped your senses in a warm cocoon. 

“Mmm… Boyfriend.” you said against his lips, grinning, as he kissed you again, his hands under your thighs as he lifted you and carried you to bed, surprisingly avoiding bumping into the doorframe this time. 

That night as you slept under the projected milky way on your ceiling with his breath tickling your ear as he snored lightly, you felt yourself give Namjoon a part of your heart you had hidden away for a very long time.

-------------------

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[survey--s]

90.

Would you mind living to 100 years old if you were in semi-decent health? Sure, as long as I was compos mentis. I wouldn’t want to live to that age if I had dementia or something and didn’t even know who I was anymore.

How did your parents meet one another?   They worked at the same hospital together. Have you ever failed an important test? Which subject?   No, nothing major.

When’s the last time you got heartburn? What do you think caused it? About two weeks ago, maybe? I don’t know what caused it, but I seem to be getting it much more often as I get older, lol.

What’s your favorite red fruit?   Raspberries.

Do you enjoy sour candies? If so, which ones?   Yeah, I prefer sour candy to sweet as a general rule. I like sour fizzy sweets like those watermelon slices and stuff.

Would you want a chance to visit Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory? If it existed, sure.

Have you ever accidentally broken a window before?   Nope.

How old were you when you got your first crush? On who?   I was about nine and his name was Jimmi.

What can you see if you look outside the closest window?   Just our backyard.

What was the last disagreement you had with someone? What was it about?   I can’t remember the last time I had a proper argument.

Which place is like a second home to you, and why?   I don’t really have anywhere that feels like that anymore.

How would you feel if your parents posted your baby pictures online?   It wouldn’t bother me at all, they’ve done to before lol.

What is one quirk about each of your parents that you can’t stand?   My dad is really hot-headed and stubborn about some things, to the point it can be quite upsetting. My mum has become increasingly flakey now she’s retired and that definitely bothers me sometimes.

Have you ever suffered from amnesia before?   Just when it’s been caused by concussion.

Do you live with roommates?   Nope, I live with my husband.

How old were you when you left your parents’ home?   I moved out at 18 for university, then back home for a year or so, then back out for four years, then home for another two years, then back out permanently when I was in my late twenties.

Do you have nice neighbors or annoying ones?   I mean, I don’t really have anything to do with them, but I wouldn’t say they were either nice or annoying, really.

Does your body feel older than it actually is?   On some days, absolutely.

If cats went to school, what kinds of courses would they take? What expensive things they should knock over, how to kick the litter as far away from the box as possible and how to shout loudly at 3am for no reason.

Were you always picked last in gym class?   No, probably around the middle.

What would you do if aliens took you back to their home planet? I mean, I have no idea - what do they want from me in the first place?

What is one major lie you got away with? I don’t know.

Has someone close to you ever passed away from cancer? No.

Do actions speak louder than words? Yeah, absolutely. Words mean nothing if you don’t follow through.

How do you like your eggs?   I don’t like eggs unless they’re poached.

What is your favorite clothing pattern to wear? I’m not a huge fan of patterned clothes.

What is something that’d be difficult to do in zero gravity?   Walk.

Did you use to have an imaginary friend? Two! Their names were Samantha and Rosie.

What are some of your short and long term goals? Short term - manage a lie-in tomorrow, lol. Long term - keep working on my business.

What would you do if one of your stuffed animals came to life?   I mean, I’d be really freaked out at first but after a while I’d think it was pretty cool, to be honest.

When was the last time you felt an earthquake?   I’ve only ever felt one once, and that was in 2007.

What’s your favorite dinosaur?   I’ve always loved Stegosaurus’ for some reason.

Which form of martial arts would you be most interested in trying?   I’m not really interested in any of them, to be quite honest.

Which type of shoe dominates your wardrobe?   Sneakers or ballet shoes.

Have you ever passed out before? What was the cause?   Yes - twice from alcohol, and I’ve fainted due to heat/dehydration before too.

The last time you were high, what was it off of? I’ve never been high.

If you were able to redecorate your room, what would you do differently? I want to re-paint it a darker colour and get new curtains.

When’s the last time you overreacted, and what was it about?   I honestly couldn’t tell you.

When’s the last time you threw up, and why? About a month ago, and I was carsick.

[transrevolutions]

please help. how do i know if i’m autistic. i think i am but i’m not sure. how.

oooh! so basically autism is a condition that affects how we perceive the world. you’re born with it, you can’t get it from vaccines, yada yada yada.

autism is really fucking hard to diagnose from an outsider’s perspective so that’s why this is a condition for which self-diagnosis is completely valid as long as you’re basing it off facts.

some signs lol:

-hyperfixating. this is also an adhd thing because those two are comorbid a lot of the time. if you already have adhd you probably do this.

-executive dysfunction. also can be an adhd thing. basically the can’t do task mode and the reason I’m failing math.

-sensory processing. this one is a bitch. sometimes it means medical procedures like shots or blood tests hurt more, but that’s just one way it can represent itself. also it can mean that sometimes you straight-up forget that you’re hungry or cold or whatever. things just feel... different. sometimes more intense, sometimes less.

-stimming. also an adhd thing. some autistic people stim vocally (singing to themselves, repeating words, making sounds) or physically (tapping, nodding, bouncing, etc.)

-what the fuck is a social norm. shit like politeness and eye contact and thank you notes and traditions seem like weird-ass bullshit. like why the fuck do we not put our elbows on the table. why the fuck do we put mr./ms./mx. before everyone’s name if they’re an adult. like you technically know why but it doesn’t make any fucking sense.

-what the fuck is nonverbal signals/body language/context clues. oh, you’re mad at me? well why the hell did you say you were fine then?!?!! you’re upset? you said you were okay! what do you mean I was supposed to just know?! (I’ve lost friends over this one before.)

-meltdowns. this is the real shit. I don’t think all autistic people have these but a lot do. not meltdowns like the kind babies or toddlers or little kids have, these are a whole other level. parents bitch about these all the time but it’s laughable because they don’t even have a clue what we are going through. basically it’s like someone’s playing a trumpet directly into your skull. irritating but bearable. now someone’s also playing a tambourine, someone’s skateboarding, someone’s spray painting behind your eyes, someone’s screaming at the top of their lungs, on and on and on.

until you can’t take it. until you start screaming your head off because it’s the only way to get the torture out and it keeps on fucking hurting and pounding in your head.  sometimes it isn’t screaming though. sometimes it’s sobbing into a pillow. sometimes it’s banging your head against a table. sometimes it’s just lying there completely empty and unresponsive. you cannot stop. it will not go away. your parents will probably yell at you to get off the floor and act your age. you can’t. you can’t and nobody believes you and there’s no way out. this was my shitty childhood.

-thought patterns. think of it as neurotypicals thinking in, say, blue, but we think in red. if someone’s only seen blue their entire life, they will not be able to ever truly comprehend what red looks like. likewise, non-autistics will never be able to comprehend the thought patterns autistic people have. autistic people will be aware usually that they think ‘differently’ from the people around them, but they often won’t quite know why, because they see all red, and at first usually think that everyone else does too.

-comorbidities. the most common ones are anxiety, adhd, various forms of depression, and ocd. of course you can have other comorbid conditions too, and you can have these conditions without having autism, but if you’re autistic odds are you have at least one if not more of these. spoiler alert but it’s probably gonna be adhd.

for more info I’d recommend you check out ASAN (autism self-advocacy network) which is basically a website BY and FOR autistic people (unlike auti$m $peaks) that actually has good and reliable up-to-date information about things like symptoms and self-diagnostic criteria (also unlike auti$m $peaks)

hope this helped!

[ollieologys]

NOT MY IDEA but I really like it :Peter thinking it's hot when you get sarcastic. Literally all day your being sarcastic with everyone cuz your in a mood and he literally is walking around with a huge hardon. When yall get home and you give him sass, hes pinning you up against the door and whispering in your ear, "try using that tone with me and I'll fuck you till you cant think straight" and reader saying “I’d like to see you try Parker”

 title; Try It

summary; You have an attitude all day and refuse to talk about why, so Peter shows you where moody behavior gets you.

pairing; Aged Up!Peter Parker x Reader

words; 1.1k

warning; smut!! like SMUT SMUT. peter and reader are both 18+ in this. unprotected sex and swearing lol

note; thanks so much for the request! hope u enjoy @loxbbg

     It was an understatement to say you woke up on the wrong side of the bed. 

Peter noticed instantly. He woke up before you, which seldom happens, and wrapped his arms around your torso. “G’ morning, baby,” Peter grumbled into your neck. He expected you to giggle softly - he knew how ticklish you were - and kiss him. Instead, you merely groaned and shut your eyes tighter. 

He attempted to remind you that today you were going to meet up with old high school friends, but your attitude seeped its way through your voice, and he decided to not bother you for a while. Peter wondered what was wrong, but he didn’t want to offend you by pushing it, so he didn’t mention anything.

You, Peter, MJ, Betty, Ned, and Flash all met at a coffee shop in Brooklyn. While everyone was excited to reconnect and catch up, you had a small smile on your face and spent a majority of the meeting quiet. MJ pointed out your unusual behavior after your coffee came.

“Y/N, you’re quieter than usual, is everything alright?” She asked you. Peter turned to face you, wondering how you’d answer. 

“Yeah, everything’s just perfect MJ.” Sarcasm oozed out your voice. MJ rolled her eyes, nothing bothering to respond as she went back to a conversation with Ned. You felt Peter’s gaze on you, silently questioning your moody conduct, but you simply shook your head and sipped your coffee.

On the ride back, Peter brought up your mood once more as he tried to make you feel better. “Wanna stop for ice cream, babe?” He asked, smiling at you.

“Oh, yeah, cause that’s gonna make me feel so much better, Peter.”

His smile dropped. Peter scoffed, glaring at the road in front of him. He loved you deeply, more than he could describe with words, and even though you rarely had an attitude the way you had today, Peter didn’t appreciate how it was directed towards him as well. Not to mention how unbelievably good you looked today. You looked good every day, yes, but something about your dull stare and uncaring strides turned something dangerous on in Peter.

Peter allowed you to walk into your shared apartment first. Shutting the door behind him, he dropped his keys onto the counter and spoke with his back facing you. 

“What are you all moody today for?” He grumbled.

“Don’t know what you mean. I feel perfect,” Your sarcasm was thick.

“God, Y/N. You piss me off when you do that, just tell me what’s wrong,” He pleaded, a tension building.

“Fuck off, Peter,”

He stepped closer to you, eyebrows furrowed. “Quit pushing me away, Y/N,”

“And what are you gonna do if I don’t?” You taunted him, stepping so close you could hear his breathing. He was never one to get angry with you, always calm and collected. He matured that way as the two of you got older. Still, you had some immaturities of a young adult and occasionally pushed his buttons. 

“Don’t play with me,” He warned, his voice lower and quieter. 

You glared as you were at a loss for words. You wouldn’t admit how much it turned you on when Peter got like this - demanding and in control. Especially in moments like this. Still, you continued to push to his limit.

“Why not? You won’t do shit.”

Almost immediately, he pushed you against the hallway wall and slammed his lips against your own. Peter cupped your neck between his hands, his grip tightening just ever so slightly. He kissed you hungrily, his mouth moving from yours to your neck, tilting your head to the side and leaving lovebites in a constellation pattern. You were trapped against the wall as his hand slid down your front and slipping through your underwear. A gasp escaped your mouth, and Peter growled against your neck. His fingers were fast, but teasing, grazing your heat momentarily before pulling his hand away. 

A distressed whine left your lips. “Jump,” He said, and you did. Peter’s hands groped the back of your thighs as he carried you from the hallway to your bed, tossing you as though you were as light as a feather. You pushed a strand of hair out of your face and watched as he took off his sweater and button-up quickly, eyes trailing from his abs to his v-line. You expected him to take off his jeans next, but instead, he pushed you further into the bed and pulled down your jeans and underwear at once. “Peter–” you started, but his face moved between your legs. 

Usually, he kissed your thighs before devouring your heat. This time, his tongue moved in up-and-down and circular motions instantly - and fast. “Oh, fuck, Peter–!” You moaned, hands pulling at his hair. He smiled against you, moving his fingers to join with his mouth and only urging you to cry out. 

“I’m gonna–I’m gonna–” Words felt challenging to form, and you swore you saw stars as you came. Peter didn’t stop, though. He cleaned you off with his mouth, turning you on a tenfold, and his tongue consumed you as though you were his last meal on Earth. He felt your legs shake on his shoulders, his heightened hearing causing the sounds of your moaning and gasping to run through his ears. He felt himself get harder by the moment. 

You came for a second time, your fingers grasping the sheets desperately. 

“Are you gonna use that tone with me again or do I have to fuck you senseless?” He questioned, but he wasted no time waiting for your response. Peter flipped you onto your stomach and pulled you waist to align with his. Maybe you shouldn’t have said anything, but you did anyway.

“I’d like to see you try, Parker,”

Peter glowered, unbuckling his jeans and pulling down his boxers. He wasted no time entering you, starting antagonizing slow. You were going to complain, but you realized he was testing you, so you said nothing. It didn’t take long for him to speed up, thrusting in and out of you with a snap of his hips. He grunted, the mere sight of you disheveled turning him on more. 

You were a moaning mess. Peter tried to hold back, not wanting to hurt you with his super-strength, but he pulled out of you and flipped you back onto your back. With your mouth gaped open, he leaned down and rested his head on your shoulder as he got close. 

“Fuck, baby–” He groaned, pushing you to your own limit and coming. He followed soon after, his come slowly flowing out of you. You gasped for air as Peter fell beside you, your high slowly coming down. He wrapped his arms around you and pulled the sheets over your body. 

“I told you not to play with me,” He breathed with a laugh

You smiled and pushed your hair out of your face, moving to sit on his lap and pushing him against the headboard.

“I’ll play with you all the time if I get that in return.”

-

tagging anyone who might enjoy ;):

@imagine-lovebug , @devin-marie , @marvellousparkerpeter , @softspideyboy , @loveme-hollandx , @minyoongi-ismy-1truelove , @beckykardashian , @bisexual-bella , @poc-gotbang , @zabdisamor , @stiles-newt-bae2210