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rivwritesiguess · 3 months ago

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Whatever You Need

Word Count: 3569 Hurt/Comfort Zayne x reader Notes: Not proofread, small warning for mention of not eating Description: Zayne wasn't really surprised when Y/N showed up late to their check-up. He was surprised when he took in their appearance. He knew exactly what it was; they were overworking themself. Now, he didn't just need to do this check-up, he had to convince them to stop. Navigation

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“You’re late.” It’s flat, as Zayne’s voice always is. He didn’t look up from what he was working on as he spoke.

He wasn’t that surprised about Y/N’s late arrival. When Greyson told him that Y/N had yet to arrive, he decided to get comfortable in his office. He wouldn’t leave when Y/N still needed to meet with him. He typically would have canceled the appointment when the fifteen-minute mark hit, but he couldn’t. It was Y/N. So, he waited. And waited. And waited. When Zayne heard the rushing footsteps to his office, he knew exactly who it was. Y/N ended up being 45 minutes late.

Y/N sighed as they dropped their bag on the couch before coming over to sit at Zayne’s desk. They nodded.

“I know, I know.” They said. “I’m sorry, really, there was this last-minute mission that came up, and then there was a wanderer attack, and then I had to fill out the reports for both the attack and the mission, and then I got the message about the reminder but my phone was turned off since I hadn’t turned it back on and then-”

“Spare me the details.” Zayne held up his hand, silencing Y/N mid-sentence. “What matters is you’re here now. Let’s get this along so we can both go home.”

Y/N was quiet for a moment, mouth hung open from what they had been about to say before they were interrupted. They had more to say, but seeing the stern look on Zayne’s face, they decided against it. They shut their mouth, giving a small nod.

“Yeah, yeah… okay.” They said defeatedly. They really did feel bad about being so late to the appointment. They were shocked when the nurse told them that Zayne was still here. They ran the rest of the way to Zayne’s office, not wanting to waste any more of his time. Sure, it was a bit exhausting after everything that happened today, but they could deal. They always did.

Zayne heard the defeat in Y/N’s tone and held in a sigh. He knew Y/N’s work always came first to them, even if it meant missing appointments. He was the same way. But, damn, did he wish they weren’t as stubborn as him. And when he finally looked up and saw them, he wished so even more.

Y/N, to put it simply, did not look good. Their hair was way messier than it usually was, looking like Y/N had just run their hands through it before coming in to try and get it somewhat presentable. The shirt they had on had tiny scratches around it, presumably from the wanderer attack Y/N had just mentioned. And then there was Y/N’s eyes. The spark that’s usually there isn’t. Not seeing it on their face almost made Zayne feel physically hurt. That wasn’t right. Y/N was always supposed to have that spark. That excitement. That energy. But it isn’t there right now. And the concealer that Y/N had attempted to use to hide their eye bags was wearing off. They were exhausted.

“So, um, what first?” Y/N asked. Another sign of exhaustion. By this point, Y/N would’ve already moved out of the room to where Zayne would perform the check-up with some sassy quip towards him as they did so. But that wasn’t there today. Zayne took a deep breath, shaking his head slightly as he stood up.

“You look terrible.” Y/N was a bit taken aback. Zayne was always blunt. He didn’t beat around the bush, but Y/N wasn’t really expecting him to say that. “You’re exhausted. You’re overworking yourself again. If you keep going like this, you’ll burn out. You can’t keep pushing yourself without expecting to face consequences.” He walked around the table. “I don’t want you walking to the examination room like this. We’ll perform a few tests here to see how your body is dealing with the pressure you’ve been putting on it.” He motioned to the couch.

Y/N sighed as they stood up. They were exhausted. Over the past few days, they’ve felt like they could drop at any given moment. Even now, they were standing up and making sure they didn’t fall over while doing so by keeping a tight grip on the chair. But they didn’t let this show to Zayne, at least not on purpose. They wouldn’t concede to Zayne’s words, not wanting him to worry about them.

This is just a simple check-up, mandatory by the Hunters’ Association. Hunters had to do a check-up with their primary care doctor at least once every other month to make sure their body was good enough to keep going out in the field. All Y/N needed right now was for Zayne to look them over, decide they were good to go and dismiss them. Then, they can go home and sleep.

“I’m fine, doc,” Y/N said as they walked to the couch, Zayne following right behind them. Y/N chuckled, hoping they could bring some light to this conversation. “Haven’t seen you in two weeks and one of the first things you do is say I look terrible. You really know how to flatter me, don’t you?” Yeah, that’s better. Change the conversation to focus on him. On how long it’s been since we’ve seen each other. Maybe then Y/N could change this into a conversation with small talk about what Zayne has been up to. Zayne would stop prying.

It was foolish for Y/N to ever hope a conversation with Zayne would go that way. Zayne’s job was to pry, and he saw right through their attempt to change the conversation. He walked past the desk to pick up the blood pressure monitor and grab some gloves. He sprayed some sanitizer on the monitor along with his stethoscope before sitting down next to River.

“Flattery has never been my strong suit.” He replied as he pulled his gloves on. He lightly took hold of River’s arm, starting to roll their sleeve up for them. “Don’t try to change the subject. Your well-being is my top priority.” He wrapped the monitor around their arm, the velcro sounding in the room as he readjusted it to fit snuggly around their bicep. “And right now, you're neglecting it. You are going to run yourself into the ground. The way you are living right now isn’t healthy. Tell me, when was the last time you had a proper, full meal?”

Y/N hesitated, thinking. It definitely wasn’t today. Dinner had been skipped due to the wanderer attack. Lunch was an apple and some chips as they walked to where they were meeting others for the mission. Breakfast was half of a donut from the box that Tara sent them home with after she bought donuts for the office. Yesterday wasn’t a good one either.

“That’s what I thought,” Zayne said, interrupting Y/N’s thoughts. He placed his stethoscope between their skin and the wrap from the monitor before he started pumping the bulb. “You haven’t been sleeping properly either, I can see it from your eye bags. The concealer you tried to use to hide it from me isn’t working.” He let go of the bulb and paused his lecture to listen to Y/N’s blood flow as the wrap deflated. “125 over 75. Slightly elevated, but manageable. For now.” He pulled the stethoscope away and started to unwrap the monitor.

Zayne put the monitor aside and looked at Y/N before continuing. “I mean it, Y/N. You need to slow down. Something is going to give eventually, and I’d prefer for it to not be detrimental to your health. What’s going on? Why are you pushing yourself so much?”

Y/N paused. This was an opening. A time to finally talk about how they feel. To let go of their shield and just talk. It was tempting. So tempting. Especially when coming from Zayne. God, they’d love to talk to Zayne. Talk to him like they once did when they were younger. Just relax with him. Let him hear them, let him respond.

But they couldn’t. They couldn’t do anything like that. Because at the end of the day, they still had to leave this office. Leave him. Talking wouldn’t change anything between the two of them, it would simply be a conversation between a doctor and his patient. Zayne would continue to scold them, telling them to change their habits, and then tell them to leave. That’s all that would happen. So they couldn’t.

Y/N sighed, shaking their head slightly.

“Nothing, Zayne. Really. I’m just…” Y/N shook their head. They couldn’t tell him. They brought their gaze to their ground, unable to look Zayne in the eyes when they spoke. Y/N was normally pretty good at lying, but when it came to Zayne... “I’ll do better, okay? I promise.” It was an empty promise. Y/N knew that.

And Zayne did too.

Zayne wanted Y/N to talk. He needed Y/N to talk. He wanted them to talk to him, let him know about their woes. And then he wanted to fix it. Fix everything they have going on. Hold them and tell them that no matter what, he’d be here. He’d fix things. He’d find a way to get rid of all the wanderers in the world just so Y/N could finally take the break they need. So Y/N could get rest. He knew that as long as wanderers were attacking, Y/N would be defending. So he knew their promise meant nothing. And he was not going to let that go. Not now, not ever.

“Y/N.” He put his stethoscope down as well as he adjusted the way he was sitting to face them fully. “I know you. I’ve known you since we were kids. I know when you’re telling the truth, and I know when you’re lying.” When Y/N turned their head away from him, Zayne knew for sure he was right. “I won’t tolerate you lying to me, especially when it comes to something as important as your health.” Zayne moved over slightly, his knee now touching Y/N’s, an action that had Y/N looking back over.

Zayne wasn’t a touchy person. He never had been. Even when they were younger, Zayne would always be still whenever Y/N wrapped him in a tight hug. From the dawn of time, Y/N had always been the one to initiate any form of touch, whether that be a hug or even just a handshake. However, here they were with Zayne purposefully putting his knee to touch theirs. And it was on purpose. Everything Doctor Zayne did was on purpose.

“Please, Y/N. Talk to me. And if you won’t do that, at least promise you’ll take better care of yourself and actually mean it. For me.”

The last two words weren’t something Zayne meant to say out loud. He shouldn’t say that. His words were starting to become less professional, and he knew that once they did, his body language would follow. It already was starting to. But he just wanted Y/N to be safe. He couldn’t handle losing them. He couldn’t handle not seeing them when he went to his favorite cafe after work. He couldn’t handle them not dragging him to the arcade to get stuffed animals. He couldn’t handle them not popping up at his office when he was staying late with some food and a soft smile on their face. He couldn’t.

He did something he’d never done before. He lifted his hand, placing it right above their knee and lightly moving his thumb in an attempt to bring comfort. He crossed the line. He only hoped this would work.

“Please.”

It did. Y/N couldn’t stop themself anymore. Not after hearing Zayne ask them to get better for him. Not after his hand was softly placed on their knee. Not after feeling the way his thumb moved with the intention of comforting them. Not after the pleading tone in his voice as he said ‘please’. This wasn’t medical. This wasn’t Zayne being their doctor. This was something else. This was personal. Genuine concern coming from a… friend? Maybe something else?

Y/N shook slightly as tears gathered in their eyes. They let their head drop as they shook their head. They couldn’t hold themself together anymore. Not when Zayne was looking at them like that.

“I’m just… so tired.” They said, their voice quiet. Broken. Zayne heard it, and it nearly broke him. They’ve never been broken before. They were always put together. Energetic. Loud. Now, they were quiet. They were finally letting go of the broken pieces they’d been desperately trying to keep together.

Zayne felt their body relax against his and held them even tighter. This. This is what he knew Y/N needed. He felt them as they shook slightly against him. He felt their tears wetting his shirt, but he didn’t care. He picked up the pieces Y/N could no longer hold and placed them to the side, swearing to help them put those pieces back together when they were ready to start to recover.

“It’s alright, Y/N. It’s alright. You don’t have to be strong all the time. Not with me.” He ran his hand over their hair lightly. Zayne knew this kind of exhaustion. It wasn’t just physical. It was mental, emotional. It was a deep-seated thing that sunk into the bones, taking root and growing stronger and stronger as time went on. It was the kind of exhaustion that manifested after having too much on one’s shoulders for too long. “Talk to me, tell me what’s going on.”

Y/N took a deep breath.

“I just… there’s always something. Paperwork. Wanderer attacks. Paperwork about the attacks. Missions. More paperwork. And it’s just so much. Don’t- Don’t get me wrong, I love this job. I got it for a reason, and I intend to keep it. I just… there’s been so much more attacks lately. It’ll be the middle of the night and I’ll get a notice that there’s an attack and I’m one of the closest, so I rush out of bed and get there as quick as I can, but that’s never fast enough. There’s always some form of damage there, whether it be something is destroyed or someone’s hurt. All because I wasn’t able to get there fast enough.” Y/N sighed. “And I know, I shouldn’t be waking up and rushing to do strenuous activities when my body hasn’t had time to wake up but I have to. Hunters have been quitting left and right because of the amount of attacks and if they aren’t quitting then they’re getting injured, so when my help is needed it’s really needed and I can’t just ignore the calls because people get hurt and the association needs me, and I know that, but I just- I can’t-...” Y/N pulls away from Zayne slightly, bringing their hands up to cover their face. “I’m sorry, I just-... I’m sorry.”

Zayne moved his hands to Y/N's, lightly pulling their hands away from their face. “It’s alright, no need to apologize. You’ve done nothing wrong. You’re doing an incredible job. You’re doing so much to help, more than most people could ever even think of doing.” He held their hands as he brought them away from their face and back to their lap. “But you can’t keep going at this pace. You’re human. You need rest. You can’t pour from an empty cup. I know that things are getting bad with wanderers. I know hunters are leaving, and you feel you have to fill the void. But you’re not a machine, Y/N. You can’t do everything at once, as much as you want to.”

Zayne moved his hands to the sides of Y/N’s face, cupping their cheeks and tilting their head up to look at him. He felt the way Y/N’s breath hitched at his touch but didn’t let it affect him too much. Not now, at least.

“Take a break. Come here tomorrow. We’ll get lunch, I’ll clear my schedule. We can go to the park, whatever you want to do. Let me take care of you. Let me make sure you’re alright. I’ll do that and more, you just have to trust me.”

For a moment, Y/N is going to give in. They’re going to listen. They’re going to let Zayne continue to hold them like this for the rest of their life. To let Zayne in. To let him help them in the way they so desperately need.

But then, their watch goes off. There’s a wanderer attack. Their help has been requested.

Y/N hates to do it, but they put their hands on Zayne’s and pulls his away from their face.

“I- I’m sorry, I have to go. This is just a few blocks from here, if the wanderer keeps moving in the way it’s going, then it could get here and hurt patients. I have to-”

Zayne shakes his head. No, he was so close. He can’t let them leave now. Not like this when they haven’t even recovered from the last attack they went to. They could get hurt. Incredibly hurt.

“No, you’re not leaving.” He grabbed their hand again, putting his other hand on their thigh as they started trying to get up. “You can’t. Not in your current state.” The flashing light from their watch made his jaw clench. He wanted to rip the watch off and throw it across the room. How dare they continue to ask for Y/N’s help after everything they’ve ever done? “You’re exhausted. Overworked and drained. If you fight like this you could get hurt. Seriously hurt. You need to rest.”

Y/N shook their head, moving down the couch so Zayne’s hand wasn’t on their thigh. They pulled their hand from Zayne’s as they grabbed their bag.

“This is my job. They call, I go. I signed up for this. I can’t sit here and ‘rest’ while people are getting hurt.” Y/N stood up.

“You’re being foolish, this isn’t safe,” Zayne said, shaking his head as he stood up as well. He knew exactly what Y/N was saying. He’d said the same thing before in regards to his own job. He reaches over, grabbing their wrist once again. “You think I don’t understand the importance of your job? Think I don’t understand the feeling of that weight of responsibility? I’m trying to protect you, to keep you safe.”

“And I appreciate that, Zayne, I really do. But I have to go.” Y/N pulls their wrist from Zayne’s again and turns to keep walking. “There’s people in danger, and I-” A sudden feeling of dizziness washes over Y/N. Black dots start to appear in their vision and their legs feel weak.

Seems like getting up so quickly after not eating or sleeping properly for a good few days is actually not a good idea, believe it or not.

“I, um-...” Y/N takes a few steps to the side to move away from Zayne, but on one of those steps, their right leg decided it no longer wished to work and gave out. They stumble and start to fall forward, about to hit the cold, hard floor of Zayne’s office.

Zayne’s eyes widened slightly as he watched Y/N start to fall. His body moved on instinct as he rushed forward, grabbing Y/N’s arm and pulling them back as he wrapped his arm around their waist, pulling them flush against his chest and keeping them up right. Y/N reached up, putting their hands on his shoulder to help themself stay standing

“Dammit, Y/N…” He muttered quietly as he led them back to the couch, helping them sit back down. Once they were down, he grabbed the watch and took it off their wrist, swiping the notification away to tell the association that Y/N wasn’t able to make it to the attack. “You’re not leaving.”

Y/N wanted to argue, but knew better. The black dots in their vision started to disappear. They didn’t want to risk getting up again, not if that could happen. “Y- yeah, okay…” They said quietly, keeping their hand on his shoulder despite being now seated, scared to let go.

Zayne nodded, glad that they had finally agreed. He didn’t want them nearly fainting to have to be the thing that pushed them to stay, but he’s glad they’ve chosen to nonetheless.

“Good.” He said quietly. The two just sat there, letting their adrenaline calm down from when it had just spiked. After a moment, Zayne reached up and put his hand on Y/N’s shoulder. “What can I get you to eat?”

Y/N thought for a moment, looking at Zayne. This was Zayne. Their Zayne. With his hand on their shoulder, a concerned look in his eyes. Finally, Y/N allowed themself to relax.

“Could… could I just have a protein bar for now?”

“Of course. Whatever you need, I’ll get it. I’m here for you, Y/N. Whatever you need.”

#love and deepspace #love and deepspace x reader #lads x reader #zayne x reader #zayne x you #lads zayne #lads #zayne love and deepspace

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charleslelurk · 4 months ago

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the chances of alex running into lando in his own building 6 times a week is endless thx to a certain neighbor

Baby (my) first outsider POV fic, let’s go

The first time Alex runs into Lando, it’s as he waves his hand in the narrowing gap of the elevator door—risking his dominant appendage—to make it reopen for him.

“Lando?”

“…Alex.”

Alex enters the elevator, sure his surprise is written all over his face. “Why are you…?”

Lando shrugs and leans against the wall as the elevator begins to move. It’s so purposeful it’s anything but casual. “Just—“

Alex glances at the floor buttons as he realizes he never pressed his own. As he jams his finger into the “12” he notices the “15” already lit.

“Visiting Carlos?” Alex supplies.

“Uh yeah. Yeah.”

“We should all golf sometime,” Alex muses. “Can’t believe we’ve never, after all the years.”

Lando is nodding but has a strange, slightly tight look to his eyes. The elevator stops smoothly on floor 12.

“See you,” Alex tells Lando as he steps off. When he catches a look at Lando’s face before the doors shut, he’s viciously chewing his lip. Weird.

———

The second time, Alex is hurrying in from the street, back from breakfast with Lily, and running up to hi condo for his phone he somehow left on the kitchen counter, before he is headed back across town to meet Patrick for their workout. It’s a busy morning.

It’s why he doesn’t notice Lando sitting on the bench inside the doors, looking down at his own phone, until he turns around after entering the elevator.

“Lando?”

Lando’s head snaps upright and he is suddenly blushing, barely visible past the heavy tan he has from his recent trip to Greece. Alex has seen the Instagram carousel.

“Why are you…?”

Lando’s eyes flick around the building lobby. “I forgot my ke—Beat Carlos here. Waiting for him, to uh, get back from his bike ride.”

Alex has a hand on the sensor, keeping the elevator door open. It’s less of a risk to his appendage this time.

“How long? Is he far?” Alex almost invites him up, but remembers he was already supposed to be driving to the cross fit gym on the other side of the tunnel.

Lando pulls his bottom lip into his mouth and looks back down at his phone. “Should be fine, yeah.”

“To wait?”

Lando looks at the door and back to his phone. “Yeah, I’ll wait.”

———

The third time is on the way down.

Alex is up early, and popping down the street for a smoothie for breakfast before the photo shoot Williams has arranged—in Nice—for Carlos and him. It’s some sponsor thing they couldn’t be bothered to fly them to England for since it can all be shot on a paper backdrop set.

When the elevator dings open, Alex meets the bright, surprised eyes of Lando.

“Mate?”

“Alex… hey.”

Alex steps into the elevator. “You’re… up early.” He checks his watch to make sure he doesn’t have the time wrong, isn’t going to be late for the shoot. No, it’s 6:45, just like he thought. Enough time to stroll to the smoothie shop and get back upstairs to gather his things and look presentable before the shoot. He is in joggers, slides, and one of his own merch hoodies for now.

Lando looks nearly the same, but with Birkenstocks and his hood up. Under it, Alex can see the peak of his curls, messier than usual. Almost as messy as when he’s just taken of his balaclava.

“Why are you—“ Alex starts, but Lando steps on his tongue.

“LEFT MY… wallet at Carlos’s yesterday,” he almost yells, echoing off of the mirrored elevator walls. “Had to get it this morning, so like, yeah.”

Alex squints at Lando. “Okay. Yeah.” Lando is fussing with his hood, arranging and rearranging how it sits on his head.

When the elevator opens on the ground floor, Lando darts out of the elevator and towards the exit to the street. Alex follows slowly behind him, pondering. By the time he makes it into the fresh air, Lando is gone from view.

———

“Fancy seeing you here,” Alex chuckles when the elevator dings open on his floor and there stands Lando. It’s nearly 10 p.m. on a Thursday.

“HI,” Lando says, too loud. He’s in the corner, oversized beige sweatshirt on that hangs in a way the material has to be high quality. The hood is up again, keeping his face partially in shadow. There’s a shopping bag in his hands, that he’s worrying the handles of between his fingers. “You’re, like, going up?”

“I am, mate.” Alex steps into the elevator and turns to face the door so Lando is on his right. “Was actually going to the roof, supposed to be a super moon tonight. Hey, you should see it, come up with me!”

Lando shakes his head, and Alex turns to face him. He’s still fidgeting with the bag in his hands, the thin plastic barely concealing whatever small box is inside. The corners are pushing at the material, sharp against the bag Alex recognizes from the pharmacy on the corner. He’s studying the bag when Lando shifts it, and he realizes with a jolt that because of where Lando is holding it, Alex has been staring towards Lando’s dick. In fact, he has the bag almost perfectly centered over his crotch, almost purposef—Alex flicks his eyes up to Lando’s face.

He looks… odd; pupils big, lips bitten.

The doors ding open on Carlos’s floor and Lando steps forward.

“Rare opportunity, mate,” Alex tried again. “Super moon.”

“Sorry,” Lando says, barely turning his head back to be heard before swinging a left to head down the hall. The elevator doors shut behind him and Alex is left comically perplexed about why Lando is in such a rush to visit Carlos at such a late hour.

———

The next time, Lando is not alone.

“Well, well, well,” Alex sing songs as he steps off the elevator and into the lobby to see Carlos and Lando together, shopping bags on their arms and deer expressions on both of their faces. “If it isn’t the man, the myth, the legend.”

Carlos cracks a smile, but Alex thinks it’s very unlike the easy ones he’s been giving Alex ever since they became teammates. “Hi, mate.” He gives Alex a quick clap on the shoulder as Lando and him pass by to enter the elevator. Carlos pauses in the doorway. “See you Monday, for the flight, yes?”

“Absolutely,” Alex shoots back. Lando behind Carlos is inching towards the floor buttons as Carlos stands blocking the door, like this niceties and filler conversation needs to be had.

“Okay, I’ll see you then.” Carlos steps back, and Lando appears to grab him by the back of the hoodie to pull him fully into the elevator and let the door shut. Pulled him by the hoodie back. The hoodie. A beige hoodie. Like the one Lando had on when—

The pieces suddenly click into place for Alex.

Oh my god.

#I hope this is working #idk if it’s working #I tried to like *lay* the clues #also Lando is on a condom run #if that’s not clear #but do they have plastic shopping bags in Monaco?#I wasn’t sure #carlando #my fic #Carlando fic

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probablyasocialecologist · 2 years ago

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Disco Elysium's setting was formerly the site of a communist revolution that established the Commune of Revachol. It didn't last long. The Coalition of Nations brutally put the communists down, divided the city among themselves, and enforced a free market capitalist system. The results are depressingly apparent in Revachol's dilapidated district of Martinaise. "The literacy rate is around 45% west of the river," Joyce Messier, a negotiator sent to parley with Martinaise's striking union, tells our protagonist. "Fifty years of occupation have left these people in an *oblivion* of poverty." This state of affairs is overseen by the Moralist International, a union of centre-left and centre-right parties that professes to represent the cause of humanism, but whose primary concern is transparently the preservation of capitalist interest – a Coalition official happily tells us that "the Coalition is only looking out for *ze price stabilitié*", arguing that inflation in Revachol must be prevented, comparing it to a heart disease that could block the "normal circulation of the economy". The people of Revachol don't matter. Their suffering and oppression is only significant as a necessary symptom of the system functioning as intended. The most biting aspect of this critique of capitalist exploitation can be found in the cynicism of those who represent Moralism, or at least, its interests. The aforementioned Joyce Messier is its perfect embodiment. She does not believe in the facade of humanity Moralism presents to the world, and is under no illusions about what it has done to the people of Martinaise. She tells you how bad things are, freely admitting that the pieces of legislation put in place by the Moralist Coalition to govern Revachol are there to keep "the city in a [...] laissez-faire stasis to the benefit of foreign capital". This corrosion of belief via cynicism, this depiction of a system that continues to operate unimpeded despite few believing in it, feels all too familiar. This critique of liberal capitalism's hypocrisy, cynicism, exploitation and deep-rooted connections to colonialism, is particularly powerful in recognising the precarious position it finds itself in. It has reached a stasis that seems, paradoxically, both insurmountable, and on the verge of collapse. Moralism relies on this contradiction. It's unofficial motto, "for a moment, there was hope", underlines the degree to which its dominance depends on the preclusion of the idea that a better world is possible, that there is no alternative, echoing the End of History sentiment that created the (rapidly disintegrating) political consensus of our lived reality. Despite growing dissatisfaction with the status quo in the real world, it has, indeed, proved difficult to imagine an alternative. The oft-repeated phrase attributed to literary critic and political theorist Fredric Jameson, that is is easier to imagine the end of the world than it is the end of capitalism, has almost become a cliché. However, the mistake Joyce makes, and one that we should avoid, is to assume that this means an alternative won't emerge nonetheless.

[...]

In a world where everyone is encouraged to look out for themselves, Disco Elysium suggests we should remember the value of collectivity, camaraderie and community. The Deserter has forgotten that though the communism he identified with is dead, the values that brought people to its cause in search of a better world remain as valid as ever. Bleak as it is, those values exist in Martinaise. They exist in us. Their latent power has the potential to lead us towards better horizons.

#disco elysium #spoilers

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axescryinwater · 2 months ago

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btw i’ve decided michael afton wears glasses. he doesn’t like wearing them. in fact, he’s self-conscious about it. and he only wears them occasionally to work and when he’s alone with you!

see drabble below ↓

the clock on the wall ticks past 2:45 am when you hear the faint sound of the door creaking open. michael’s home. you don’t need to ask how work went; the tired shuffle of his boots is enough to tell you it’s been a long night.

you’re sitting on the couch, a worn-out book in your hands that you’ve probably read a hundred times already. the house is quiet, save for the distant hum of a fan, and the way the dim light from the hallway filters into the living room. the air feels heavy. when michael steps into the room, you can tell he’s exhausted. his hair is messier than usual, his shoulders a little more slumped, but what catches your attention immediately is the pair of glasses perched on his nose. the same glasses he rarely wears outside of when it’s just the two of you. he looks... a little too good in them. "hey," you say, glancing over the top of your book. “haven't seen those in a while.”

he gives you an unreadable look, but you can see the subtle awkwardness in the way he gently pushes them up his nose, like he's trying to make them disappear. "yeah, well, i don’t really like them," he mutters.

you raise an eyebrow, setting the book down in your lap, "they're cute."

he doesn't respond. crossing the room, sinking heavily down onto the couch next to you. you can smell the lingering scent of cigarette smoke and sanitizer on him, his technician’s outfit looking a bit rumpled. he keeps his gaze fixed on the carpet, fiddling with the edge of his sleeve. “long night?” you ask, tilting your head to the side. he sighs heavily, slouching back against the couch. he rubs at his face with one had, glasses pushed up onto his forehead. “the longest,” he mumbles.

you hum sympathetically. he glances at you out of the corner of his eye, his gaze flicking over your face. "how was your day?" he asks, though his words are more of a formality than a genuine question. you know the day doesn’t really matter to him, but you tell him anyway. about work, about the book you’re reading, the mundane errands you ran, whatever pops into your mind. michael sits there quietly, just listening. he’s been so tired lately; it’s been weighing down on him heavily. “you doing ok?” you ask abruptly but gently, after a long pause. he gives a noncommittal shrug, still looking at the ground. “m’fine,” he mutters, though he’s anything but. you study him closely, and you can see that the bags under his eyes are more prominent than usual. his shoulders are tensed. you set your book on the coffee table, shifting your body and kissing his cheek.

michael leans a little into the touch. the tension on his expression eases just a little, though there's still a frown on his face. he glances at you. “that all i get for coming home so late?” he says, his voice teasing. you laugh breathily, almost like a sigh. kissing the corner of his mouth. he can’t help but crack a small smile as you press a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth, the action so familiar to him. he lifts a hand, gently brushing your cheek with his thumb. “missed you,” he murmurs, the words slipping out before he can stop them. "mm. missed you." you kiss him in a slow way, a lingering press, more comfort than passion. he lets out a soft sigh as your lips meet his, he kisses you back, gently and unhurried, as if the world outside the walls of your home didn’t exist. he tastes faintly of nicotine. he deepens the kiss, his mouth moving against yours in a familiar rhythm.

he shifts on the couch, angling his body towards yours, and pulls you closer. he kisses you a little harder this time, his hands skimming over your hip. he’s always been affectionate when he’s tired, and the exhaustion from his shift just makes him all the more needy. he breaks off the kiss, his forehead resting against yours. he’s so close that you can see the tiny freckles across his nose, the tired bags under his eyes. “stay with me,” he murmurs against your lips, hands finding their familiar place on your waist. his thumb rubs idle circles on your body. he sounds tired. “i don’t want to be alone right now.” you pull away slightly, your thumb tracing his cheekbone as you study him closely. he can’t bring himself to meet your gaze, eyes averted, and you can tell there’s something weighing on his mind he’s not telling you.

(okay this is a sidenote but omg imagine the SL ending when mike opens his eyes and he has glasses on...... like he just got scooped but i #needthat....... i think i'm ovulating.)

#michael afton #need that #michael afton fluff #michael afton x reader #x reader fluff #michael afton headcanons #michael afton smut #fnaf hcs #fnaf headcanons #fnaf #michael afton x female reader #michael afton x male reader #fnaf michael afton #fnaf movie #michael afton fnaf movie

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thefemmefatalexo · 5 months ago

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Nanami SMAU - A Verdict of Us

Chapter 7 - Beyond First Impressions

Summary: Kento Nanami was perfect—disciplined, untouchable, and entirely focused on his future. Emotions didn’t fit into his plans. You were everything he avoided—bold, warm, and impossible to ignore. You told yourself he didn’t matter, but you couldn’t stop watching him.

He never looked your way. Not until the day his perfectly controlled world unraveled, and you were at the center of it.

an: i love them. SMOOCHES 💋💋💋

{chapter 6} ; {next}

taglist: @gigiiiiislife @getovibesonly @inthedarkshadows000 @burpzz @sleepykittyenergy @fuzzycollectiondeersblog @meganbaby

࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

Nanami adjusted the cuffs of his sleeves as he glanced at the clock on his desk. It was 9:15 AM, just enough time to leave and make it to the community center by 9:45. Punctuality wasn’t just a habit for him; it was an expectation. He hated being late. Still, a part of him wondered why he had agreed to this at all. Volunteer work was not something he typically did, but when you had asked—so insistent, so sure he’d secretly enjoy it—he found himself unable to say no.

He made his way to the hallway, pulling on his shoes with practiced efficiency. The soft hum of conversation from the kitchen grew louder as his parents noticed him preparing to leave.

“Nanami,” his father’s voice came first, sharp and questioning. “Where are you going?”

“To a food drive,” he replied evenly, not looking up as he tied his laces.

“A food drive?” His mother appeared in the doorway, her arms crossed as she surveyed him. “Why? You’re a law student, not a volunteer coordinator. What purpose does this serve?”

Nanami rose to his full height, meeting her gaze with calm detachment. “Not everything has to serve a purpose.”

His father let out a disapproving scoff. “Time is a resource, Nanami. You’ve always been disciplined about how you use it. Why waste it on something like this?”

“Time spent helping others isn’t wasted,” he replied curtly. His parents were intelligent people, but their view of the world often felt limited, measured in tangible gains rather than intangible impacts.

His mother’s expression softened slightly, though the tension in her tone remained. “It’s just… unexpected. You’ve always been focused on your goals. This seems unnecessary.”

Nanami met her words with silence. There was no point in arguing further. Grabbing his bag, he moved toward the door. “I’ll see you later.”

He left before either of them could respond, his steps steady and purposeful as he made his way to the community center.

The moment he stepped inside, the atmosphere shifted. It was a flurry of motion—tables lined with donations, volunteers chatting as they sorted and packed food into neat bags. The noise was different from the usual silence of his library job or the precise discourse of a lecture hall.

And then he saw you. You stood near one of the tables, your face lit with excitement as you waved to him. The smile you wore was bright enough to compete with the sunlight streaming in through the windows.

“You made it!” you said as you walked over, your voice bubbling with enthusiasm. “And on time, too. I’m impressed.”

“I said I’d come,” he replied, his tone steady, though he couldn’t quite ignore the slight warmth in your expression.

“Fair enough,” you said, hands on your hips as you gestured toward the tables. “Come on, we’ve got work to do. Ready to roll up your sleeves?”

He followed you without comment, and soon the two of you were stationed at a table sorting canned goods. It was simple, methodical work—exactly the kind of thing Nanami excelled at. His movements were efficient, his rows of cans stacked neatly.

“You’re pretty fast at this,” you said after a while, glancing at his organized piles compared to your slightly messier one.

“It’s straightforward work,” he replied, his tone dry as he eyed your less-than-perfect stacks. “Unlike yours.”

You gasped in mock offense, placing a hand over your heart. “Are you criticizing my organizational skills?”

“I’m observing,” he said, his smirk barely visible but unmistakably there.

“Careful, Nanami,” you teased, narrowing your eyes playfully. “That almost sounded like a joke.”

“Almost,” he admitted, his voice calm but lighter than usual.

As the minutes turned into hours, Nanami found himself surprisingly at ease. The work, though repetitive, was oddly satisfying. And then there was you—chatty and energetic, your humor keeping the atmosphere light. It wasn’t something he was used to, but he didn’t mind it.

A child approached then, holding a box of cereal. The boy looked up at Nanami with wide, curious eyes, then glanced between the two of you.

“Are you two dating?” the boy asked innocently, his voice cutting through the hum of activity around you.

Nanami froze, his composure momentarily slipping as the question hung in the air.

You, on the other hand, burst out laughing, quickly covering your mouth as you tried to stifle the sound. “No, no, we’re not. But that’s a very sweet question,” you said, your tone warm as you crouched down to meet the boy’s gaze.

The boy shrugged, apparently satisfied, and wandered off, leaving Nanami still standing stiffly.

You straightened up, turning to him with a grin. “Relax,” you said, nudging his arm lightly. “He’s just a kid. You look like you’ve been accused of a crime.”

He exhaled slowly, the tension easing from his shoulders. “He caught me off guard, that’s all.”

“Noted,” you replied, your grin softening into something gentler.

By the time the food drive ended, the sun was low in the sky, casting a warm glow over the street outside. You wiped your hands on a towel and turned to him with a satisfied smile.

“It’s getting late,” he said, his voice steady but quieter than usual. “I’ll walk you home.”

You blinked in surprise, then smiled. “Really? Thanks, Nanami.”

The two of you walked in comfortable silence for a while, the quiet of the evening settling around you. As you passed a small ice cream stand, you stopped abruptly.

“Wait. We need ice cream.”

“Do we?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes,” you said, already stepping toward the stand. You didn’t wait for his answer, quickly ordering two cones. Handing one to him, you grinned. “My treat. Consider it a thank-you for volunteering.”

He took the cone with a small nod. “It’s good,” he said after a bite.

“Of course it is,” you said confidently, as though there was never any doubt.

As you walked, you began to talk about your volunteer work in other countries—building schools in rural villages, helping at medical camps, organizing clean water initiatives. Your voice grew animated as you described the people you’d met, the lessons you’d learned, and the challenges you’d faced.

Nanami listened intently, his ice cream forgotten as he took in your words. He’d always assumed you were a privileged socialite, someone who flitted from one frivolous event to another. But now, he saw a depth to you he hadn’t expected.

“You’ve done a lot,” he said finally, his tone thoughtful.

You shrugged, glancing at him. “It’s important to me. I’m lucky to have the resources, so why not use them to help others?”

He nodded slowly, his respect for you growing in a way he hadn’t anticipated.

When you finally reached your building, you hesitated for a moment before turning to him. “There’s a charity event next week. My parents are hosting, but it’s for a good cause. You should come.”

“Another one?” he asked, his tone wry but not dismissive.

“Yes. Consider it practice for networking,” you said with a teasing smile.

He thought for a moment, then gave a small nod. “I’ll be there.”

Your smile widened, radiant in the soft light of the evening. “Great. See you then, Nanami.”

He watched as you disappeared inside, then turned and began the walk home, the faint taste of ice cream still lingering on his tongue and your laughter echoing faintly in his mind.

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ghost-in-cyberspace · 5 months ago

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The Pleiades

Astronomy Facts

The Pleiades, also known as the Seven Sisters or Messier 45 (M45) is an asterism, or star group of an open star cluster containing young B-type stars that formed in the last 100 million years just above the shoulder of Taurus the bull constellation.

It's on average about 444 light years away from Earth. That means the light in this photo left the star cluster in 1581. It's also the nearest Messier object to Earth. It's the most obvious star cluster visible to the naked eye.

In Ancient Times

They were one of the first stars mentions in literature, appearing in Chinese Annuals in 2350bc. The Nebra sky disc found in Germany has these stars displayed with the Sun and Moon, this disc was made in the 1600BC. Sailors used them for navigation, as the “Plein” in their name literally means “To sail” in Ancient Greek. Farmers used them as a marker for when to sow and harvest crops, since they appear in the autumn, being a winter Asterism. The Zuni tribe of New Mexico called them “seed stars” and when the stars disappeared in the spring they sowed their crops. Other cultures believed they seeded the planet and were the seven mothers of Earth, (hey Hemidal of the Aesir in Norse Mythology had nine mothers).

In ancient times the Pleiades played a role in establishing many calendars.

In ancient India, in the Atharvaveda (the knowledge store house of Antharvanas, the procedures for everyday life, the fourth Veda and part of the Vedic scriptures of Hinduism) the Pleiades have the name Kttika, which meant the cuttings or those that mark the break of the year.

The Stories

The Pleiades are a very visible star cluster and because of that and because it's close to the ecliptic (the line of the sun's passage in the night sky or the zodiac line) and it's seasonal appearance makes it a great source of stories, folklore and myths.

Nearly all of them say they're 7 sisters and usually explain why they see 6 stars.

North Africa

The Tuareg Berbers, a semi nomadic ethnic group from North Africa (mainly the Sahara) call the Pleiades Cat ihed meaning Daughters of Night. Their proverb (translated into English) is: “When the Daughters of Night fall, I wake looking for my goatskin bag to drink. When they rise, I wake looking for cloth/clothes to wear”

This means that when the Pleiades sink below the horizon at spring, Summer is coming, and in the desert will be getting hot and drier, and they rise in the Autumn and that is when the rainy season starts, so start dressing warmer.

Native American

Wyoming- Kiowa tribe

In Wyoming, North America stands Mateo Tipi or Devil’s Tower. Legend is that one day the tribe was going south, and a bear attacked a group of seven girls. They climbed the rock and asked the Great Spirit for help. The Great Spirit made the rock grow taller and the bears kept clawing and scraping it away, so the rock grew taller still. Until the little girls were high in the sky and became stars.

Greek Myth

I'm ending on this one as it ties to a winter cconstellation. Also we often use the Greek names in astronomy.

The Pleiades in Greek mythology are daughters of Pleione and Oceanid and the Titan Atlas.

The sisters names are:

· Maia (mother/ nurse/ great one) who was the mother of Hermes

· Electra who was the mother of Dardanus and Iasion by Zeus

· Taygete mother of Laceaemon by Zeus

· Alcyone (ally) the mother of Hyrieus, Hyperenor, Aethusa, Hyperes, Anthas and Epopeus by Poseidon

· Celaeno mother of Lycus, Nycteus, Eurypylus and Euphemus by Poseidon

· Sterope (Asterope) (star) mother of King Oenomaus by Ares (some stories say she's Oenomaus wife)

· Merope the youngest who married Sisyphus.

Merope is the lost sister as her star is the last to have been mapped by Astronomers and is the faintest star, invisible to the naked eye. In the stories she's lost either because she married a mortal, or because she married Sisyphus who was punished in the underworld for both murdering his guests and repeatedly literally escaping from death . His punishment is to roll a stone up a hill forever. Either way Merope faded away. In other versions the lost sister is Electra, whose son was the King of Troy and she faded when Troy fell.

In one version of their story, the Pleiades were grief stricken at either their father Atlas who was punished after the Titan's war with the Olympians by being forced to hold up the heavens , or the fate of their sisters the Hyades and killed themselves. Zeus changed them into stars.

Another version that ties to the constellation of Orion is that after Atlas was imprisoned Orion began to relentlessly pursue the Pleiades. They were companions of Artemis who asked her father Zeus to protect them. Zeus changed them into doves then stars. Artemis was then angry that she lost her companions so her brother Apollo created a Scorpion that killed Orion. Orion then was changed into a constellation and so was the Scorpion (Scorpio) and Orion continues to pursue the Pleiades in the sky, and he in turn is chased off the sky by Scorpio.

#astronomy #writing #research #mythology and folklore

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dulcecherub · 10 days ago

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Synopsis: Sofia Flores is a junior resident at Kildare Hospital. All she wants is to prove herself. Be the best at what she does. But she can’t help the feelings she’s developing for Rafe Cameron. The son of Ward Cameron, the er attending. They also own the hospital. If it couldn’t get more messier than that. The last thing she needs is a relationship that can turn sour. But… shes falling fast and hard.

Author’s note & disclaimer: this is not meant to be a 100% accurate representation of how hospitals work. So please do not see it as such. Nor am I attempting to make it accurate. I know I’m going to get some things wrong. Honestly maybe all of it. I’m clearly not a professional so some of it might just be so I can move the story forward. This is just meant to be a fun little series. I will try and do my research on certain topics. I won’t lie, I will be touching upon some heavy themes. So be warned ahead of time. Also they’re obviously aged up. All the Pogues are around their late 20s. While Sofia and Rafe are in their 30s. Also he’s nothing like canon Rafe. Sorry… not really. Not proofread!

Warnings: mentions of abuse, graphic depictions

MASTERLIST

Chapter One | Chapter Two

Chapter One: The Jane Doe

7:45 am

Sofia clicked her pen closed, then began to tap it against her sheets. There was no information about this patient. She’d scoured the whole entire portal for anything. Medical records, past and present. She came up short; which was words for absolutely nothing. Just like every case of these, it’s almost like the person never existed. The only evidence of them, their physical body. Nothing more. Sofia turned to look towards the glass doors. Towards the woman on the gurney in Trauma Bay 3. She couldn’t be much older than her early twenties. She let out a breath of frustration. She couldn’t help but feel a tug at her chest. The woman was horribly injured—

“Found anything?” Dr. Carrera asked, Sofia turned to see Kiara looming over her. She bite her lip, shaking her head.

“Another Jane Doe.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah.”

Sofia looked back at her screen once more, since there was no use in looking anymore. She got up from her seat.

“I’m going to go and let Dr. Cameron know.”

“Rafe or Ward?”

“Ward.”

Kiara made a face but didn’t say anything more. She sat where Sofia was previously. Sofia made her way towards Trauma Bay 3. Passing by patients. Passing family members, she stared briefly at one woman who was holding, what seemed to be her husband’s; hand. Sofia winced once she saw his face. Then quickly masked her face. She finally found Ward, observing over a medical student.

“What’s their BP?” Ward asked, his eyes on the screen. Clearly knowing the answer but needing the response of his student.

“Uh uhhh.” The young man was sweating profusely, he held an IV in his hand. Meant to be attached to the patient. But he seemed to be waiting for Ward’s instructions.

“That’s not an answer. The patient cannot wait for your hesitancy.” Ward looked over to his student. “What’s the patients BP?” He asked once more.

“124 over 77. Uh normal for his age.” The young man wiped his brow, eyes whipping to look over at Ward. Ward nods, smiling.

“Good. Good. Now you’re going to find his vein and insert the IV. You know how to do that, correct?”

Sofia cleared her throat, Ward eyes met hers. His face not really changing.

“We have a Jane Doe on our hands.”

Ward lets out a breath of exasperation, merely nods and steps away from the medical student. “Dr. Routledge will help assist you. I trust you’ll be in good hands.” The medical student glances towards John B who smiles. He stands next to the machine reading out the patients vitals. She spots the other doctors and nurses around the 40 year old patient. Sofia only glanced briefly before she follows Ward out.

“Jane Doe, you say?” Ward asks, his eyes ahead of him. His strides strong and steady. Sofia practically runs to catch up.

“Uh yes, Dr. Cameron.” Ward nods, as he continues to walk towards Kiara. She stiffens; as he leans over to stare over the computer. “Two policemen came in, along with our EMS team. Charge nurse Rose-Maria brought them to our senior resident, Dr.Callahan.”

Ward nods.

“No medical records?”

“She says her name is Ally. But she also said she’s not sure about that fact. So no medical records and the patient has no recollection of her name. Not even who she is. Or where she is. She’s not even aware of the year we’re in. After a while, her speech began to slur. So we rushed her over to one of the Trauma Bays.” Kiara answers.

“Brain injury then.”

“Yes, seems like a case of TBI. Her head was split open. She was barely conscious. Kept slurring her words.”

“She was found on the side of the road.” Sofia mentions. “With cuts all over her body. Her head split open from the top of her head. Barely conscious as Dr. Carrera explained. One of her eyes is swollen shut.”

“We gave her 8mg of morphine for the pain. That should be able to reduce the neuroinflammation and the blood-brain barrier. As well as, able to improve the neurologic and hisopathologic injury.✦ So far it seems to be doing so.”

Ward nods, “Let me see her.”

“Uh, Ward. Dr. Cameron is working on her currently. Trauma Bay 3.” Kiara says, she faces Ward head on now. He just nods once more.

“No worries.” He pads away towards Trauma Bay 3. Once he does Kiara lets out a deep breath. Sofia only smiles, Kiara closes her eyes.

“Don’t start.” Kiara says, Sofia finally lets out a giggle.

“You know, you don’t have to be scared of him.” Sofia leans against the desk. Her mind briefly away from the Jane Doe and how she managed to get herself in such a predicament.

“I’m not scared… I just, I just want him to like me.” Kiara nearly whispers, Sofia has to lean in a bit to hear.

“He’s not as scary as he looks.”

“Says you, he loves you. I heard him tell one of the higher ups that you’re one of his best residents. Better than Rafe.”

Sofia felt her face heat up, she could only imagine how red she was in the face. She had no words, she hadn’t expected him to think so highly of her. To her, she was doing the best that she could.

“Oh that’s not tr—”

“Hi Kie.” Nurse JJ says, he leans against the counter. Kiara only purses her lips.

“Dr. Carrera.”

“Right. Dr. C. I just wanted to wish you a happy morning.”

“Nothing is ever happy on the trauma side of the hospital.”

Sofia took her sign to walk away, not wanting to see JJ fail at flirting with Kiara… again. She stepped toward the opposite side of the wing. Towards Trauma Bay 3. She walked in carefully, letting the door slid shut. Sofia notices Jane Doe has already been intubated by Rafe. —Rafe eyes were immediately on her.

“Dr. Flores.” He blinks rapidly, Sofia eyes widen. Her hands behind her back.

“Dr. Cameron.” Her eyes stayed glued to him, until she remembers who else is in the room. Ward. And the last thing she needs is for him to suspect anything. She also notices Dr. Heyward and now Dr. Routledge in the room as well. A few nurses and student doctors. She clears her throat for the second time that day. Blinking rapidly to hide any emotions trying to peek through.

“I wanted to check in with our Jane Doe. She came in pretty bad shape. I wanted to help in any way I can.”

He blinks again, his brows raising, before he can utter a word. The machine begins to beep uncontrollably. Ward snaps his neck towards it, “Her oxygens levels are decreasing.”

Pope and Topper begin to look over the monitor. They share a look. Sofia can only imagine how bad things have taken. She turns towards Jane Doe, her face barely recognizable. Sofia couldn’t even map out her features. Ward examines her head, running his gloved hand gently against the open wound. Her brain visible, Sofia has seen it all for this to barely phase her now. She notices one of the medical students eyes bulge out of her head. Sofia remembers that feeling, seeing more of someone. Of knowing them truly from the inside and out. She notices the way the students hand shakes as she hands Ward a scalpel. He takes it into his own with ease. Steady.

Jane Doe body convulses, her eyes rolling behind her head. Ward lets go, as Rafe turns her to the side, her mouth facing the ground. He holds her, as Sofia finally draws closer to help. “Come on Jan Doe, stay with me.” He mutters to the patient. “We already did a CT scan of her brain. CSF leaking. Seems to be a mild brain injury. But still will consider it a TBI, since she doesn’t seem to recall herself and where we were. We also intubated her because her airways were blocked. Originally the plan was to stitch back her head. But clearly things have taken a turn.”

“We need to get her into emergency surgery stat.” Sofia says, as she moved towards the gurney. “Her oxygen levels should not be decreasing with her being intubated.”

“We’re going to need to prescribe Carbamazepine.” Topper says, “Will help with the seizure.”

“That’ll have to wait after.” Ward says, his eyes also on the monitor.

“We’re going to need to reduce the swelling on her eye as well.” Pope says, his attention on Jane Doe eye.

“That’s right, we’re going to need to get Triescence.” Rafe says, now also eyeing the patients swollen eye.

Sofia looked back at the Jane Doe, her eyes scrunching up in sympathy. How did she end up like this? In Kildare Hospital, her name forgotten from her own lips. Her idea of home non-existent because she didn’t remember herself. Sofia blinked back tears. She couldn’t imagine a world where she didn’t know who she was. She bet Jane Doe wouldn’t have either.

Whoever did this. Or whatever occurred for this to happen. Sofia could only hope Jane Doe was able to survive it.

9pm

A rapid tapping noise jolted Joyce forward. She looks up to see a woman, no younger than 30, practically banging against her glass.

“Ma’am, please stay calm. If you want my help. You cannot bang against this glass.” Joyce says firmly. Her eyes meeting the woman’s.

“My sister! Is she okay?! Ally Robertson! She—she— oh god she was left on the side of the road! I-I told her not to go to that stupid audition. That it was a scam and she didn’t listen! Please, please I was told she might be here.” The woman’s words nearly running against each other. Her face crumbled into horrified tears, her mouth down casted.

“Ma’am please slow down. Take a deep breath and sta—”

“My sister Ally Robertson is hurt! What are you not understanding?! Is she here or not?”

“Ma’am—”

“Ally? Her name is Ally?” Kiara says, coming closer to hear what the lady has to say. She’d been printing some paperwork out. When she heard the woman begin to yell and tap aggressively against the glass of the receptionist window. —The woman head juts up and down. Her lower lip trembling.

“Yes! Yes! Ally Robertson!” The woman hand stays on the glass, despite Joyce’s protest against it.

Kiara eyebrows go from furrowed to rising in shock. “Oh my god. Give me one second please.” Kiara nearly bolts back into the trauma bays, her eyes landing on Rose-Maria.

“What room is our Jane Doe again?” Kiara asks in a hurry.

“Uh, trauma bay 3.” Kiara, once again nearly bolts.

“Kie, Kie con calma.” Kiara isn’t listening, as she nearly collided with JJ. Who lets out a umph. Before his lips twitch into a smirk.

“Woah, no need to be all over me now.” He jokes.

“Now’s not the time JJ.” She manages to swivel past him and into Room 3.

“I think we might have a name for Jane Doe.” All the doctors, nurses and student doctors head swivels to stare. “I think her sister is in the lobby.”

Rafe and Sofia share a look this time. Sofia nods, as if the two of them spoke a secret language; only the two of them understood.

“We’re going to have to let her sister see her. But once after we do the emergency surgery. She won’t be able to identify her yet.”

The nurses began to prepare for the surgery. Rafe went to grab himself a new pair of gloves. As everyone else went around the patient. “We need to perform an subdural hematoma.”

“Why not an epidural?” Pope asks.

“It’s either or. But I rather do a subdural.”

No one questions him. Not even his own dad, everyone just nods and begins to prepare for the procedure.

Reese, as the woman finally gave her name, explains how her sister was searching for auditions on google. Since her agent hadn’t been able to find her any gigs. She’d found one on what seemed to be a reputable website.

“I knew in my gut it was a scam. I just knew something was going to go wrong. And now…” Reese begins to sob into her hands, as Cleo, the social worker of the hospital sits next to her. Placing her over some of the tissues she’d provided.

“I understand this situation is scary. I can’t imagine how you must feel. But our doctors and nurses are doing everything they can to help her.” Her Caribbean accent peeks through as she tries to soothe Reese.

“Can I just—” Reese hiccups, “can I just know any updates on her. I don’t care how bad it might be. I just need to know. I can’t take this anxiety anymore.”

Cleo brows furrow in concern, she nods. “Of course, as soon as I get word of any more information. I’ll let you know how she is.”

Reese nods her head, she holds a crumpled up tissue in her hand. She lets out a shaky breath, blinking away her tears.

“Is it- is it bad that I’m angry with her?” Reese whispers to Cleo.

“You’re allowed to feel angry. Especially since you mentioned she hadn’t fared your warning.” Reese rubbed her nose against the tissue.

“I just can’t help but feel guilty for being angry. Like she’s in here, that should stir some sympathy. But I’m just so mad. At her, those men and what they did to her. I just feel so fucking angry.” Her leg began to bounce, her face hardening, staring off into space.

Cleo nodded, her eyes still showing sympathy. “That’s completely understandable. Just know the hospital is working with the police to find out who did this to her. You’re not alone in this, Miss. Robertson.”

“T-thank you, I’m so sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have hit the glass. I was just—you don’t understand. She and I, as much as our relationship is rocky. I love her and I can’t imagine my life without her in it.”

Sofia walked into the room, her eyes landing on the patients sister.

“Hi, I’m Dr.Flores. I came in to update you on the status of your sister.” Reese eyes widen as she nods rapidly.

“Yes, yes is she okay?”

“At the moment, she’s in surgery. She came in with a pretty bad head wound. We found out she also had TBI. Which just means traumatic brain injury. We’re doing the best that we can. But uh—” Sofia glances over to Cleo, who seems to be listening intently. Sofia sits down next to Reese on her opposite from Cleo. “We think she’s going to be paralyzed from her left side of her body.”

“Oh god.” Reese began to cry into her tissue.

“I know this is all hard to hear.” Cleo begins, “But please trust that our doctors are doing the best they can to help your sister.”

“That brings me into another point. Do you know what could have happen for her to end up this way?” Sofia chimed in, focused in on Reese. Reese nods once more.

“She got scammed. She thought she was going in for an audition. Then I didn’t hear from her in over 24 hours. I got worried and then I got a call that she might be in this hospital. Apparently she’d been left on the side of the road. All banged up and—” Reese sobbed into her tissue once more, Sofia eyed her with compassion. Her eyes softening.

“This must be so hard on you. I’m so sorry you have to be in this situation. As our social worker Cleo has mentioned, she is in very good hands. Dr. Cameron is one of our best in Kildare Hospital. He’s doing the best he can to ensure your sister comes out of this alive and well.”

“Thank you. Thank you so much.” Sofia nodded.

11:22am

Sofia stood opposite of Rafe as he carefully stitched back up, who they now know as Ally. Ward had been taken to another patient who came in from a car accident.

Ally’s eye was finally not as swollen as when she came in. Her face starting to become a bit recognizable. Sofia couldn’t help but watch him. He was so amazing at what he did. He was always so calm and collected. His tongue stuck out a little as he concentrated on stitching back her head.

“The procedure was successful. I was worried there for a second we were going to lose her.” He says, Sofia eyes widen.

“Really? You were worried she was going to die on us?”

“Yeah. I always worry. Don’t-don’t tell anyone I said that.”

“Of course not.” Their eyes meet, he flashes her a small smile. It feels for a second as if the world had stopped just for them to look into each other’s eyes. A world of their own. No one able to disturb it.

Until, he clears his throat.

“Alright, let charge nurse Rose-Maria know we can bring in Ally sister.” He looks over to Ally. “She should be waking soon enough.”

Sofia is already taking off her white scrub, as she walks towards the glass doors.

“Got you.”

“I know you do.”

Sofia fights back her blush as she smiles at him. Before heading back to Cleo and Reese.

As Reese walks in, the policemen also follow. “We presume she was kidnapped. Seems to be a group effort, kind of thing.” One of the policemen relies to Reese.

Sofia jaw ticks as she listens in. Her hand turning into a fist. The idea that a group of people could do this to someone.

“Men?”

“We presume so. These kinds of injuries. We don’t think—”

Sofia then shuts them out. Not wanting to hear anymore, her eye’s focusing on the glass doors. At least, she’s safe. At least, now she was here and not with those awful people. Her stomach churns, she shakes her head. Fighting back tears, she seen the worst of the worst here. But the idea of someone hurting someone to the point, where they were now paralyzed on one side of their body. Her eyes swollen to the point of being unrecognizable. Sofia wished she could find who it was and—

“In here.” She doesn’t even realize she’d spoken until she does. No time for disassociating. She needed to present.

2:13 pm

Sofia craned her neck, rubbing it as she circled her head. Sarah stood in the elevator with her.

“You two are so obvious.” At first, Sofia isn’t sure what she’s talking about. Until she sees the smirk on Sarah’s face. Sofia face begins to flush and Sarah lets out a giggle.

“Can we not.” Sofia says, trying to hide her flush.

“You know, I’ve never seen my brother crazy about anyone.” Sarah just grins towards Sofia. “And he seems really crazy about you.”

“We work together, Sar. Plus I’ve been there. Done that. Remember Lucas.”

“Unfortunately I don’t think anyone can forget your asshole of an ex husband.” Sarah grimaces. “He’s still being a bitch about seeing Seth and Carmen?”

“He says if he lives on the opposite side of the country. Why should he have to see them. It’s fine. It’s not like they want to be around him anyway.”

“It’s not fine, Sof. He can’t just treat you and your kids like that.”

Sofia rubbed her brow, puffing out her lips. “Well, he does so what can I do. It’s like he’s still punishing me for divorcing him.” Sofia looks ahead, watching as the numbers on the elevator move up. “What he doesn’t realize is he’s punishing them too.”

A silence creeps upon them. Sofia feels Sarah’s hand on her arm.

“He never deserved you.” Sofia places her hand over Sarah’s. Sofia squeezes her hand gently.

“Like you said, he’s a bitch.”

Both woman begin to laugh. The elevator finally lands on the NICU. Sarah begins to step out.

“Thanks again for lunch Sar. Without you, I think I wouldn’t remember to eat.”

“Of course Dr. Flores. Anything for you.” Sarah blows Sofia a kiss before the door closes once again.

Sofia lets out a sigh, her mind wandering towards Lucas. The wood crackling as she sat next to him in the fire place. Their home together, one she’d always dreamed of. The grand staircase leading to high ceiling rooms, so spacious it all felt like a dream. One, that crawled in her stomach, one she knew she was going to wake up from. The inevitable creeping up on her. The anxiety like tree branches stretching and stretching…

She remembers it, the first time he’d laid his hands on her. The sting of it, the disbelief that someone she thought who loved her could hurt her; like that. She knew if Sarah knew the full story. If anyone knew the full story. That they couldn’t ever look at her the same way again. Sofia wouldn’t be able to stomach the idea of anyone treating her differently. Just because of what he’d done to her. She didn’t want to be defined by her past. By her ex shitty husband. She would carry this heaviness, it was hers and hers alone to bear.

The elevator opened up back to her floor. She watched as people speed on by. The beeping of machines hitting her ears, as Kiara and Rose-Maria huddle together. Talking amongst themselves.

Ward was motioning the student doctors to one of the trauma bays. Engrossed in his conversation with them to spare a glance at anyone else.

“I haven’t seen you all day after the whole Jane Doe situation. I wandered were you wander off too.”

Sofia jumps back, her eyes trailing up to stare Rafe in the face. He smiles at her, softly and gently. And she swears, she can hear everything become background noise.

Rafe lets out a chuckle, “Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you.”

“No, no it’s okay.” She shook it off, as if she were shaking rain off of her body. Her lips pursing. “Uh I went to go get lunch with Sarah.”

He nods, but his eyes narrow in suspicion.

“You good?”

“Oh, uh yeah. All good. No need to worry about me Dr. Cameron.” She mustered up a smile and looked up at him. His brows were still scrunched together.

“How’s the kids? Carmen and Seth?”

“Oh, they’re good. As good as preteens can get.” Rafe chuckles, Sofia attempts a chuckle that she knows to her own ears doesn’t sound as carefree.—It seemed such an easy thing for him to do. She doesn’t know how he never takes any of this home with him.

“Good. Good. I’m glad to hear it. I was actually wondering-”

“Dr. Cameron! A patient came in with a broken pelvis, shoulder and hip.” Rafe snapped his neck towards a nurse, nurse Cruz He stood waiting for Rafe.

Rafe brows crinkle further, he juts out his lower lip in concentration. He stalks over to nurse Cruz. Sofia right behind him. “Those are random places on the body to correlate with one another. Car accident?”

“No, trapeze.”

Both Rafe and Sofia raise a brow.

“She’s a circus performer. The netting broke, she fell from pretty high up.”

“Shit.” Rafe followed nurse Cruz towards the circus performer; while Sofia stood back.

“New patient!” Rose-Maria yells, as Sofia hurries over. She meets Barry, one of the EMS workers. As they lead a new patient in.

“55 year old woman. Heart attack. We had to intubate her while we were on our way here.”

“She seems stable now. But her BP was going over the normal range.” Kelce explains as he helps Barry wheel her in.

The woman doesn’t speak, “She’s also deaf so we did the best we could. Neither of us know sign language.”

“No worries, I do.”

‘I’m doctor Flores. Can you tell me your name?’ Sofia signed.

The patient attempted to raise her hand, but her hand shook.

“Okay, let’s take her to Trauma Bay 2.” Kelce and Barry hurry to take the new patient to Trauma Bay 2. As Sofia follows after them.

“Nurse Maybank, can you come with me? Also bring in two of the student doctors. Rugg and Johnson.”

JJ nods as he motions the two of them along with him and Sofia.

“Come on, let’s go teach these students about heart attacks.”

8pm

Sofia placed her keys onto the tray in her front door.

“Mom?!” Carmen yelled from the living room.

“I’m home!” Sofia yelled back, walking into the living room. She walked towards Carmen, kissing the top of her head. “I left you guys dinner in the fridge. Just had to heat it up. Did you?”

“Yeah, Seth served me.”

“That’s good. Where is he?”

“In his room, studying.” Carmen stares up at her mom. Her eyes searching Sofia’s face. “How was work today?”

Sofia’s mind flashes to everything that occurred that day. Her mind not letting go of what happened to Ally. Their Jane Doe.

“Same old, same old. You took a shower right?”

Carmen nods, “I had soccer practice after school. So yes, I was not about to stink.” Sofia chuckles as she moves away from her daughter.

“I should probably do the same. You better have done your homework too, missy.”

Carmen rolls her eyes and nods. “Fine, I’ll go do that now.” She follows Sofia out of the living room. “Did you see Rafe today?”

Sofia stiffens up a bit, before smiling over at her daughter. “I work close with him. Of course I did.”

Carmen begins to smirk. “He likes you.”

“Carmen, what did I say?” Sofia scolds.

“What? You want me to lie?”

“Go do your homework.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Carmen heads into her room before shutting the door. A smile still present on her face. Sofia lets out a deep sigh before walking towards her own room. Preparing to hop into the shower.

“Kids.” She murmurs to herself.

Sources: ✦https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0361923021002586

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