#michaels my bitch wife

[domifucker]

if anyone needs me i'll be over here being abnormal about shoresy season 2, keeso really decided i was going to feel the whole spectrum of human emotion

[himbos-on-ice]

[hiragikiss]

𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆, 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆！

₊˚ෆ── tags : fluff, slight hurt/comfort, married life, husband & wife, fiancé & fiancee, mentions of kaiser's past (spoiler ig?), mentions of pregnancy, mentions of nudity(no smut), pro athlete!au

₊˚ෆ── including : fiancé!michael kaiser, husband!mikage reo (ft. wife/fiancee! reader)

₊˚ෆ── sum. : hey, where's your ring? why is it off your finger?(should i do part 2. . . ? )

⊹ ִֶָ𓏲࣪𖹭 𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐄𝐋 𝐊𝐀𝐈𝐒𝐄𝐑

when it comes to choosing partner, a person that he wishes to spend the rest of his life with, michael kaiser is very careful about it. he has witnessed the darkness behind a failed marriage for so long and decided to never make a mistake in his own, as to not bear the consequences of poor decision. thus, kaiser has always been so full of love and patience when it comes to you. he has always been as gentle as possible whenever he speaks or touches you.

but, everyone has a limit and seems to react negatively to it in the most non suitable moment ever. you knew he might have been so upset and emotionally disturbed with all of the pent up stress, building up from the pressure of the media, his team and more. however, it does not act as an excuse for him to let it all out on you. that night, he was obviously irritated to the point of snapping at you.

he laid on the sofa, sighing heavily as he squeezed his eyes shut, trying to calm himself down from the sudden bubbling anger rushing through his veins at this very moment. he had just return from an interview regarding to his career updates and happened to be rudely bombarded by nosy paparazzis, causing his phone charm to be lost in that moment. the crowd was too much, he can't reach nor search for the charm, not when the guards were shoving him into the van with protective manner. to the others, it might have been a cheap phone charm that he could purchase any time yet to michael kaiser, it holds so much memories, it meant a lot to him. and you.

you heard your fiancé while you were cleaning up the kitchen. excited to see him, you toss your apron onto the marble kitchen island, making your way towards him. perhaps you were too excited to see him that you didn't notice the still wet floor that you mopped minutes ago, ending with you falling onto the floor with a loud thud, sound of picture frame crashing could be heard as you tried to hold onto a surface to balance yourself but grabbed the wrong thing instead. the loud noise startled kaiser, his anger is pumping rapidly in his veins again, rising up from the sofa and make his way toward the noise.

"love— "

"why can't you be quiet for once? you always had to do something to get on my nerve, don't you?"

your eyebrows furrowed upon his taunting words that are hinted with anger. you knew that he's overstimulated by frustration but it still stir the annoyance in you. who is he to snap at you just because he is feeling negatively?

"wow, my bad i guess. didn't know it'd be a crime to be excited to see my fiancé."

kaiser frowned at your words.

"i don't like your tone."

"right, says the one who started being such a bitch."

"watch your mouth— "

"watch yours first, michael kaiser. look, i don't know what had happen during your interview but can you not take it out on me? i'm not a tool for you to release your stress on. you know what? go cool yourself off, until then we'll talk."

you ignored him as he stood there silently. you fetch your cleaning tools and carefully deal with the broken pieces, placing the picture back on its place while gathering the ruined pieces of broken picture frame into the dust pan. michael only watch your movements, not even a word spoken. he knew you're right and listened to your words as he remove himself from the spot, heading out for a walk.

kaiser spent quite a long moment as he sit by the lazy chair perched up in the garden where you've planted various flowers. the warm white light shining onto each petals and leaves of the flowers, making it appearing more romantic to look at. kaiser's fingers fiddle with his engagement ring hugging his ring finger as he zone out. his mind is clouded with hazy thoughts that are rapidly messing up his mind at this moment, be it from his past or present. he rethink of his behaviour toward you moments ago and sighed heavily. such violent behaviour his, it almost resemble to his abusive male parent back in his childhood.

growing up in violent atmosphere, pain is all he ever learn about. he yearn for love ; to love and to be loved. he spent his childhood imagining what a love would feel like ; is it true that motherly love feels like heaven? is it true that fatherly love feels like you're in the safest universe ever? they said, parents are the hero of every children, yet, why does his abused him and neglected him?

was it because his parent's love were meant to be painful as you yearn more for it? was it because love was never real? or worse, was it because he is just an unlovable child? if love truly exist, why does he need to suffer in order to get a taste of it? they said love is sweet, yet why was it bitter to him? they said love is warm, yet why was he lying on the cold floor as warm fist pounding his fragile body? they said love is soft, yet why was it full of thorns as he held it in his palms?

that was what he was taught about love from the unhealthy surroundings he was locked in. when he met you, he discover what true love is like. he learned that love is when you let out quirky laughs that tingle his ears yet warms up his chest as he laughs along with you ; he learned that love is when you learn about soccer trick online to impress him just for you to clumsily trip, telling him that you'd love to learn more of his passion ; he learned that love is when you hold him tightly as his vulnerable side was exposed when he had failed his own expectation, validating his emotions and never resort to violence to make him quit from feeling low. love with you is what he has always read about on the fairytales storybook that he secretly kept in his room when he was a kid.

you came to him and show him that love isn't always a hard gain yet he hurt you with his action. the thought of you walking away from him suffocate him. he knew he is only imagining about it yet to not see your smile, to not hear your laughter, to not smell your heavenly fragance, to not touches your skin and to not share your warmth is something he could never want to lose.

"god, i fucked up." he cussed under his breathe as he runs into the house, looking for you.

he entered the shared bedroom, heart drop at the sight of your engagment ring placed upon your vanity table. you're not in the room, which adds up to his overthinking. when he heard the soft patterings of shower waters hitting the floor, that's when he knew you're in there. it confirmed his guess when he heard soft sniffles coming from there as he leaned his ear against the door. he was quick to undo his garments and grab your ring, entering the bathroom as quietly as possible.

"darling?"

his heart soften yet saddened at the sight of your crying nude form, standing under the shower head as you try your best to not let out too much sniffles. thank god you're still with him. he makes his way toward you, engulfing you into his chest, holding onto you as his lips raining kisses unto your wet skin.

"please forgive me, my love. i'm sorry for hurting you." he apologised, rubbing your back softly to comfort you.

"must've hurt your ego to apologise to me, huh? serve you right." you countered his words with a hint of sadness in it.

"it hurts even more if i lose you, love. i never want to lose you."

he whispered, lowering his lips to capture yours, apologising to you silently. you closed your eyes, savoring his kiss, letting his lips stiches apology unto yours, a promise to never hurt you again. he parted his lips from you, eyes looking into yours as his palm make its way to caress your cheeks. his hands then moves itself to grab yours, kissing each knuckles before he slides your ring back to its place. he sealed it with another kiss on the ring.

"please, don't leave me, love."

"i won't, darling. i'm here, forever and always."

⊹ ִֶָ𓏲࣪𖹭 𝐌𝐈𝐊𝐀𝐆𝐄 𝐑𝐄𝐎

mikage reo, a man who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth along with a face blessed by the heaven. he has always knew that his life is well promising and had nothing to worry about. he has always been so generous of his money, be it to use on himself or use it on his friends. just as when he was with his toys when he was a toddler, always sharing it with his play dates or childhood friends. when he reached the age of entering teenager life, he is still so kind when it comes to money matters until it was when he met his friend, nagi seishiro. for once in his life, he dislike sharing, nagi is his friend and nobody could have him.

that goes on until the day he met you. when it comes to you, not even his beloved close friend could have a touch. for the very first time in his life, he is not kind with nagi when it comes to you. nagi wants to play games with you because he heard you're good at it? no need, reo is hiring a famour gamer to play with nagi. nagi would like to hear about your plant pet? no need, reo is buying him a whole nursery of cactus that varies from different species of cactus. nagi was suspicious of reo but he couldn't complaint because at least he is getting something better to ease his boredom.

reo even make it obvious to the other girls that he is yours the moment both of you made it official. reo is well known for using aesthetic hard covers for his phone but when he started dating you, he changed it to clear case, polaroid of you that's his favourite will be placed in it, displaying to others and showing off his lovely lover.

what about you? how do they know that you are mikage reo's lover? it's easy, it's those luxury branded items that you're wearing. he always make sure that most of it are custom made and limited item. it may cause him to spend a little bit extra but hey, if it's you, he'll even sacrifice the world to make sure you're always pretty and well taken care of. he knew how you love to care for yourself from the way you do your skincare, haircare, daily exercises, makeup and dressing up. he loves it as well and enjoys to indulge into it. as long as you're happy, he is happy as well.

that was until today, when he saw a frown on your pretty face. it wasn't common for you to get upset so easily, he wonder what could've cause such discomfort for you. is it the month of your menstrual cycle begin? no way, that'll be on another 2 weeks, he keep tracks on them. is it because your boss was being harsh on you? no way, he started up a business for you to run and support your cute cafe that sell fresh pastries, sweet flowers and refreshing coffee. is it because your favourite show was postponed because of the billing? no way, he made sure to purchase a year worth of membership with the highest graphic quality for you every year. so, what is it that bother you? he makes his way toward you and holds your hand only for you to pulls it away from him quickly, panic eyes staring at his. he noticed how you hide your hand behind you.

"hubby! hi!" you stuttered a little, trying your best to hide whatever you'd like to hide from him.

"you good, dearest? why won't you let me hold your hand?" he asked, his hand moving to grab yours again.

"my skin is too dry, it'd be unpleasant for you to hold them." you told him, removing your hands from his again.

"what a nonsense, you've always been perfect, dear." he praised, leaning in to press a soft kiss to your forehead.

"my, thank you. aren't you praising me too much, reo?"

"mm, never, dear."

he kisses your lips this time, distracting you from his hand caressing yours, pulling away when he finally caught unto the reason of you hiding your hands from him. he looks into your eyes, scrunching up his nose when he noticed you're getting a bit shy from his full attention and affection.

"what?" you pouted.

"you're so cute and silly too, dear." reo teased, giggling when you playfully frowned at him.

he fish out a velvet box from his back pocket, showing it to you as he opens them. inside, is your wedding ring, the one that you thought you had lost it. you gasp and look at him.

"how?! i thought i lost it!"

"i took them for a cleaning, remember? how could you be so forgetful, dear."

reo smiles as he gets onto one knee, holding your hand gently as he slips it back onto your ring finger. standing up, he kisses the back of your hand. he is so amused with your expression at the moment, all flustered just like how he proposed to you before.

"why were you not telling the truth while ago, hm?" reo questioned.

"knowing you, you'd buy new ones if i truly lost it— "

"why, of course. i'll buy you as many rings as possible, as long as you're happy."

of course he would, how could you doubt him? he is your husband who love to spoil you a little too much.

"thank you, but i'd love to lower the usage of our money, you know?"

"why? is your cafe's billing getting higher? i'll— "

"reo hubby, no. little mikage is on the way, of course we should be spending wisely, right?"

"oh, right, yea— wait. what?!"

you laughed at his reaction. my, your husband is so entertaining.

"yes, dear. we're having a baby!"

reo laughs happily as he hugs you, carefully yet tightly.

"i'm calling nagi, he needs to know that he is an uncle now!"

and you know you did the right thing when you accepted his ring of promises and afraid of losing it. he promised to make you the happiest person ever and he did fulfilled his promises. or should you say, he has always been fulfilling his promises and sealed his promise to eternity.

© HIRAGIKISS 2024 | do not repost my contents to any other platforms.

masterlist . pinned post

[ju1cyfru1t]

Hello. I read a few of your scenarios for the Rise boys and really liked them. So, I decided to sent in my wok request.

Could you do something for the four brothers (separately) where they react to their s/o calling them their husband. Like s/o is on the phone and reverse to the turtle as their husband. Like not directly to them but they still hear it.

If I didn’t describe it well enough you could look up ‚calling my bf husband to see his reaction‘ on TikTok they’re really cute and funny.

And the gender of the reader is up to you, I don’t really care.

your wish is my command 🧞‍♀️ AND THANK YOU <3

ROTTMNT x Fem! Reader

reader accidentally calls him her husband

Rise! Leo, Mikey, Raph, Donnie x Fem! Reader (separately)

fluff! :D fem!reader, romantic

It’s Pizza night at the lair! :D….like almost every other night.

You offered to call in to order the pizza for them. How kind. To be honest, he wasn’t really listening until you said something that really caught his attention.

“Yes, thank you. and my husband would like-“

Leo

- internally screaming but tries to play it cool

- if there’s anyone who’s gonna make you regret even opening your mouth it’s this mf

- cocky bitch, but is polite enough (I guess) to wait until you’re off the phone to say anything

- OBVIOUSLY now he’s gonna call you wifey

- “HUSBAND? I mean, Husband, huh? I knew you liked me, but not THAT much~” STFU

- def laid awake that night thinking about it tho

- is never going to let you forget this

- “please, allow your husband.”

Mikey

- externally screaming

- you got him running laps 🏃‍♀️

- considered getting down on one knee right there 💍

- Immediately is all over you; peppering your face with kisses, his arms wrapped around you

- he is squeezing the life out of you he was so happy to hear you say that

- you cannot tell me he isn’t 100% convinced you’ll be together for the rest of your lives anyways

- but to hear you say it like that??? he just finds you so precious

- “ y/n you’re so cute!” “Michael hold on! I’m still on the phone-“

Raph

- took him a minute to process

- wait him??? your HUSBAND???

- I mean…he didn’t mind that sound of that.

- man is already thinking of his vows 👰‍♂️ JK

- is surprised for a moment, but just lets himself be happy. he is a bit embarrassed tho

- daydreams your wedding now

- might accidentally call you his wife now too 🧍‍♀️

- “guys, remember my wife said in- I MEAN, Y/N. Y/N SAID- I MEANT Y/N-“

- Leo is rolling on the floor laughing, Donnie is slightly horrified

- Mikey is your flower girl

Donnie

- almost snaps his neck to whip around and look at you

- Flabbergasted and also a little afraid

- Honestly hoping he heard you wrong; That’s a big commitment

- Don’t get me wrong; it’s not that he isn’t committed he just doesn’t know how to feel about MARRIAGE

- probably had to excuse himself for a moment to really process (might have went to his lab to scream)

- would try to go on normally like it never happened, but it’s definitely burned into the back of his mind for a long time after that

[leclerc-s]

short n sweet

series masterlist

liked by maxjonesverstappen1, isabellaperez, penelopetrevino and others

maejonesverstappen short n' sweet is officially yours now!!!

i feel extremely lucky that each time i write a new record i learn a little bit more about myself, and can create from that place. the making of short n' sweet was one of the most special, honest, up and down, stupid and fun experiences of my life.

i thought if something was funny enough to make me laugh then maybe it belonged in a song. happy or sad!

thank you to my brilliant talented friends, writers, producers, mixers, engineers, and creative minds that helped me bring this world and these songs to life. not a serious thought was thunk yet somehow they wefre..lol i love you and am so grateful.

i will keep this short n sweet buuuut more soon. go listen now and i hope you love it

tagged: jackantonoff, amyallen, julianbulian, johntheblind, julia michaels, sharp_stick, jeff.gunnell

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maxjonesverstappen yeah fuck me i guess..it's not like i sat with you for hours on the piano while jack was on the phone...

maejonesverstappen i love you 💙 maxjonesverstappen okay 😊😊 love you too 💙

user28 MAE WREN JONES!! YOU ARE INSANE!!

isabellaperez i need someone to inject this album into my veins

maejonesverstappen you're insane actually isabellaperez pot meet kettle

user67 this is insane. someone sedate me.

charles_leclerc so this is what you meant by 'no more depresso up in this bitch'?

maejonesverstappen exactly leclerc!! charles_leclerc to be fair, we do love a good sad song maejonesverstappen yes, mr. i helped write so long, london. we are well aware

user19 oh this album has versatility. i was expecting something like espresso to be the entire album noooo.

user27 the range singers have to go from a pop happy song to a sad depressing song will never fail to amaze me user03 for real!! i could never be a singer because i don't have that in me

rhysjones i don't think max will appreciate his wife posting the 5th picture...

alex_albon this is the man who admitted he would sleep with daniel if given the chance... i don't think he cares georgerussell he's too busy talking about retirement in press conferences to care maxverstappenjones1 i'm very secure in my marriage thank you very much maejonesverstappen i however live in fear he'll dump me for daniel and runaway with him

user75 bed chem is about max verstappen.

user47 you're so right bestie. the blue eyes line gave that shit away

schecoperez it's 6 in the morning. i should not have to deal with his screaming this early...

maejonesverstappen i'm very sorry but i warned you against staying with him. maxjonesverstappen1 i would take offense but it's very true schecoperez as the children say...this is my hell

danieljonesricciardo well that's one way to celebrate your anniversary...

maejonesricciardo don't be bitter because i did it before daphne could. danieljonesricciardo my wife released an album on my birthday!! maejonesricciardo tomato tomahto!

oscarpiastri something tells me these guys didn't listen to the full album

logansargeant i know way too much about their sex life baileywinters PINK FUZZY HANDCUFFS??? landonorris SHE'S INSANE!

user54 someone needs to study mae's brain under a microscope ❤ by penelopetrevino, lewishamilton, jensonbutton and others

mickschumacher god bless his mother's genetics indeed

maejonesverstappen this is why you're my favorite mick mickschuamcher 😊

victoriaverstappen it's certainly something... great album, ignoring the songs about my brother that is.

maejonesverstappen NO! VICTORIA LOOK AWAY! arthur_leclerc bit too late for that mae...

user43 i wonder how daphne's doing...is she clutching her pearls?

user30 is she flabbergasted? user90 PUH-LEASE mrs jones-ricciardo has no room to judge. she's written worse, possibly. user43 you're so right. how could i possibly forget about dress and the moaning user30 OH MY GOD?

kellypiquet amazing album 💫

maejonesverstappen thanks? btw max isn't in this post is that why you didn't like it? maxjonesverstappen1 mae, we've talked about this. pr is not happy when you pick fights with people. user13 oh the lore here goes so deep it's insane zoyatorres dear user13 you have no idea just how deep the lore goes here.

lewis hamilton if i hear another song about max emilian jones-verstappen's dick it will be too soon.

charles leclerc and somehow I'M the one with the long name

natalia ruiz you have three middle names. you DO have a long name charlie

mark webber it's too early for lewis to be talking about dicks

max jones-verstappen you're just jealous because you've never had a song written about you lewis

isabella perez 🤓☝️ that's not true jones-bitchstappen george russell ???

isabella perez according to my research, aka a tiktok deepdive with osc at 2 am, one nicki minaj wrote "you ain't fuck nicki, you fucked nicole body" about one sir lewis hamilton

nico rosberg so that is why he ended his career as one hit wonder xnda

lewis hamilton literally fuck you nico nico rosberg you've tried pierre gasly WHAT THE FUCK? lewis hamilton STOP TELLING PEOPLE I'VE TRIED SLEEPING WITH YOU! THAT'S NOT TRUE!

alex albon HE DATED NICKI MINAJ??

lando norris WHO DATED NICKI? alex albon LEWIS!!

lewis hamilton we were friends!

daphne jones-ricciardo weeeellllll lewis hamilton daphne, don't you dare daphne jones-ricciardo i didn't do anything! lewis hamilton YOU WERE ABOUT TOO!

logan sargeant LEWIS DATED NICKI?

freya vettel this is some wild lore we're uncovering here

ollie bearman i thought he was dating shakira?

dulce perez shakira might just be old news, who the fuck knows with lewis

lewis hamilton am i not allowed to have friends now?

george russell unless you're willing to publicly announce your friendship with nico rosberg again, we'll just assume every woman you talk to is your girlfriend bailey winters at least set some realistic standards george, that's never going to happen.

nico rosberg for the record, we are friends

sebastian vettel eh, are you though? fernando alonso stay out of it homewrecker sebastian vettel mark webber ass kisser jenson button you two belong in a retirement home mark webber why am i always getting dragged into shit?

rowan todd wait, lewis dated nicki?

carlos sainz nicki who? pierre gasly nicki minaj she sings that one song about snakes mae jones-verstappen well it's an innuendo for dicks but yes pierre gasly yeah, you would know all about innuendos wouldn't you? mae jones-verstappen this is why rowan's never written a song about you

rhys jones LEWIS DATED NICKI? WHEN?

isabella perez oh back in like 2018 lewis hamilton STOP SAYING THAT! I DIDN'T DATE HER!

zoya torres awfully defensive for someone who didn't date her

jenson button oh he totally dated her

lewis hamilton YOU'RE NOT HELPING? jenson button i'm supposed to help??

daniel jones-ricciardo caught them kissing in abu dhabi

lewis hamilton STOP!

george russell he's actually screaming from his drivers room. i can hear him.

george russell update: bono just went in there an asked what was wrong and he replied with, 'they're driving me insane bono!' george russell and now kimi is asking what's wrong with him. what do i tell him?? ollie bearman nothing, let him live in delusion that all of you are super cool and not at all dumbasses max jones-verstappen who lied and told him we were cool? ollie bearman the internet

lewis hamilton i hate all of you

isabella perez can't wait to force you to do media with charles. especially those stupid song challenges just to play a nicki song lewis hamilton oh my god, what the hell did i sign up for? carlos sainz your own personal hell

esteban ocon what the fuck is happening?

mick schumacher lore dump or whatever they call it these days

maxjonesverstappen1 and maejonesverstappen posted new stories

mae said this was very cutesy, very demure, whatever that means. ps i think she did in fact kidnap one of daph's cats this guy is literally so out of it that he didn't notice that i sent him an old picture and am literally standing right in front of him. ps yes he is literally asleep. pps this not very demure of him.

liked by maxjonesverstappen1, isabellaperez, penelopetrevino and others

maejonesverstappen taste video is out now 💋

tagged: jennaortega, davemeyers, campbellrohan

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rhysjones be honest, did max flip out when he found out you were kissing jenna?

maejonesverstappen it was more of a 'do you really have to?' with a pout jennaortega it was actually a tantrum rhysjones oh i love you. please stick around to humble max jennaortega of course!

isabellaperez petition to have me star in your next music video?? i'll kiss you too

maxjonesverstappen1 back off perez, that's MY wife jennaortega he told me the same thing maxverstappen1 who invited you? jennaortega your wife did actually

user98 this music video altered my brain chemistry. i'm not even kidding

user41 you're so right for that. someone please get them to star in a movie as lesbian lovers user1 she has more chemistry with jenna then she did with barry. as if she would ever dump max for barry ❤ by maxjonesverstappen1 user52 max being a barry hater is so funny to me but you go babe.

lilymhe can i be in your next video??

maejonesverstappen of course my love 👩🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👩🏼 alex_albon i thought you two would grow out of this maejonesverstappen1 wow alex being a homophobe in 2024, what would lewis think? alex_albon I'M NOT A HOMOPHOBE! i just don't want you stealing my girlfriend lilymhe and yet carmen and i never complain when we third wheel you and george alex_albon i-

user30 the chemistry was insane

user54 RIGHT? i need to see them act as love interests in a movie soon user97 max jones-verstappen would probably die user30 he just hates to see a girlboss (jenna) winning ❤ liked by jennaortega user54 it's because he knows jenna could steal his wife if she wanted too ❤ liked by jennaortega

maxjonesverstappen1 you look great and she's there

jennaortega jealousy is a disease, hope you never get well maxjonesverstappen1 i will not lose my wife to a pipsqueak user42 max is currently in the trenches. not only is this man struggling with a fuckass red bull but he's also on the verge of losing his wife

jensonbutton as the children say, i fear this ate

fernandoalo_oficial i don't think you're using that right lewishamilton he is, you're just annoying fernandoalo_oficial to quote jenson earlier, 'you belong in a retirement home' user27 man what the fuck goes on in their group chat? nicorosberg that's a question i keep asking myself every time i open it up. user50 NICO'S IN THE GROUP CHAT?

user34 they ate and left no crumbs y'all

user40 absolutely devoured the fucking plate user62 i blame mae jones-verstappen and daphne jones-ricciardo for my high expectations of music videos now

danieljonesricciardo okay, this one was insane. i love it

maejonesverstappen thank you kind sir danieljonesricciardo of course kind lady user56 if my relationship with my in-laws isn't like theirs i don't want it.

daphnejonesricciardo you're actually insane for this one

maejonesverstappen thanks i got it from my sister 🩷 daphnejonesricciardo i hate you 🩷

nataliaruiz actually run away with me, we'll raise jules as our own

charles_leclerc what the hell did i do to deserve this? zoyatorres i don't think she needs to tell you what you did freyavettel yeah we were all there oscarpiastri i agree with whatever they say charles_leclerc all of you are banned from our house nataliaruiz no, you aren't, don't listen to a word he says.

liked by maxjonesverstappen1, charles_leclerc, rhysjones and others

maejonesverstappen serena and blair (F1 version)

tagged: nataliaruiz

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nataliaruiz i love you the way charlie loves max

maejonesverstappen which is a lot maxverstappenjones1 this is slander charles_leclerc oh so you don't love me? was that a lie? maxjonesverstappen1 oh my god, you're needier than my cats are charles_leclerc this is why you haven't won a race since spain... maxjonesverstappen1 THIS IS WHY I DON'T LOVE YOU!

user09 ferrari x red bull wags are my favorite

user42 personally i love nat and penny too but there's something special about THE lestappen wife and fiancée being besties user58 it's mae being besties with charles but natalia and max being enemies for me

nataliaruiz i might just fight someone with you over the cars

maejonesverstappen oh i am so in maxjonesverstappen1 mae, we've talked about this, you can't fight anyone charles_leclerc silvia said to take this down nataliaruiz silvia loves me, she did not say that

user57 serena and blair taking on f1 was not on my bingo card this year

rhysjones i've heard we're fighting salty spice??

redbullracing i'm sorry what? rhysjones for legal reasons this is a joke maxjonesverstappen1 i can't believe i have to deal with both of you rhysjones this is all because you chose to marry my sister

isabellaperez there are 206 bones in the human body...

oscarpiastri my sisters follow you on instagram... isabellaperez i regret nothing oscar

zoyatorres i thought we were blair and serena?

maejonesversttapen we're more like peyton and brooke zoyatorres you are so right, no man is worth it logansargeant ??? maxjonesverstappen1 YOU TOO?! zoyatorres she was mine first verstappen maxjonesverstappen1 *jones-verstappen please

user86 the matching bows!!!

user31 they're giving black swan and white swan user50 mae being the white swan has never made more sense to me

vancityreynolds i'll say this serena is much more annoying than the original

maejonesverstappen this is why hugh beat the shit out of you in your movie. vancityreynolds suck it vertically challenged!

user26 tall gf and short gf

maejonesverstappen i prefer the term snack sized maxjonesverstappen1 you're literally married to me. you're not natalia's girlfriend. maejonesverstappen never stop your husband from letting you find the love of your life victoriaverstappen oh she's so right maxjonesverstappen1 STAY OUT OF THIS VICTORIA? user26 damn men can't take a joke these days. so sensitive.. user31 it's because max is losing his wife to someone new everyday.

zoyatorres just so we're clear, i'm invited to this 'fighting of people?' there's someone at the top of my list.

maejonesverstappen of course, that's who we're getting first nataliaruiz absolutely kyle_kirwood room for one more? zoyatorres 100% percent! logansargeant please take this down. charles_leclerc please take this down. maxjonesverstappen1 i'm being told to ask for you to take this down. i actually couldn't care less but for legal purposes, please take this down. zoyatorres no ❤️ maejonesverstappen no ❤️ nataliaruiz no ❤️ kyle_kirwood i meant what i said, so no ❤️

¡taglist!

@burningcupcakefire @arkhammaid @applopie @lorarri @bb-swift @thewannabewriter @mypage-myfandoms @stopeatread @hobiismyhopeu @lilsiz @alessioayla @niniluvsainz @au-ghosttype @six-call @justtprachisblog @nichmeddar @unluckyyoshi @cool-ultra-nerd @kami10471633 @1nt3rnetgf @fernandoswarcrimes @arieltwvdtohamflash @brekkers-whore @natcha888 @camdensreg @mycenterfold @dear-fifi @georgeparisole @dan3avocado @nikfigueiredo @bella-182 @namgification @jensonsonlybutton @weekendlusting @trouble-sistar @lesliiieeeee @leclercsluv @33-81 @theseus-jpg @sarah-thatstings-ann @minmira95 @casperlikej @formulaonebuff @hopenshaw @hwalllllllelujah @doodlehunz @prongsvault @anytimeanywherebitch-blog @hopenshaw

¡leclerc-s speaks! this did not age well…but also because one person asked for this i’m posting it.

¡disclaimer! this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

[wittlesissyb4by]

Smooches (Custom Caption)

“Thank you so much for coming to betasit!” Your wife smiled as Molly entered. 

Molly had a superior air about her as she surveyed the room, looking at everything in your pathetic little nursery like it was tacky and overdone, but when her eyes got to you, sitting on the floor in your little dress and diaper, that’s when her nose really turned up. 

“What can I say,” Molly said, hardly sparing you an ounce of attention, “it’s fun to put little losers in their place!”

Your wife smiled like she was the happiest woman on earth. “Well i’ll be gone until late in the night, so you are free to use and abuse him however you see fit! He has a bottle in the fridge, a fresh jar of pureed prunes in the pantry, and plenty of snacks if he gets hungry. If he gets fussy or misbehaves, please do not hesitate to spank him!”

Molly looked at you with a malicious smirk, “oh i think he’ll be getting more than a few spankings whether he’s good or not!!”

Both the girls laughed, causing you to tremble on the floor so hard that your diaper crinkled. You couldn’t help but fold in front of Alpha women. Their dominant superiority eclipsing your pathetic, puny excuse for manhood. 

Molly crouched down on her haunches in front of you, making her already tight gym pants squeeze and press in ways that made your legs clench. You always had the biggest fetish for gym leggings. Your wife knew it, and apparently Molly knew it too. 

Her eyes bore into you, making you squirm under her gaze, she lifted your chin so that you were forced to look at her. 

“You are a loser! Do you understand, little bitch? I mean, look at you…” she gestured with her hands open at the display of a diapered dork in a dress quivering right in front of her. “I bet you’ve already pissed your little pampers, haven’t you?”

“N-no!” You tried to say, but her hands were already lifting your skirt, pressing the padding between your legs. It was warm and plump. But…but you were dry before! When did you even do it? You were so shook by their presence that you must have—

“Oh my goodness!!” Molly exclaimed, clapping her hand to her face to cover her laughing lips. Her other hand was tugging at your waistband so she could get a peek of what was inside your diaper. “It’s so tinyy!!”

Well that wasn’t really fair. It was the cage that made it look so small. When it was out and free it could get to almost 2 inches long!! But it had been months since that last happened…

“And look how leaky he is!!” Molly giggled to your wife, as if she didn’t already know. “Good thing wittle miss pottypants has her pampers on to catch all her stickies!!”

Your face flushed a deeper pink than your dress while Molly scoffed at your shame, standing back up to speak to your wife. “It’s no wonder you found a real man to fuck!”

Your wife simply shrugged, “now you know what i’ve been dealing with for so long. Luckily Michael is ten times the man my huggie hubby will ever be! I added some of his ‘protein’ to the cuck’s bottles, maybe that’ll make my pathetic pamper pisser grow a pair…but I doubt it!”

Both girls cackled at your pitiful torment. Your wife, wiping tears of laughter from her eyes, stepped forward. “Well…i better get going! Don’t want to keep him waiting!” She pivoted on her heel and jutted out her perfectly toned, voluptuous ass in front of your face, tapping a finger to her perky, springy cheek. 

You knew what that meant. You looked to Molly for help or for a lack of judgement, but neither came, her arms were crossed, she knew exactly what you were going to do and how pathetic you were for doing it. 

Sighing, you leaned forward, planting a kiss onto the soft silk of your wife’s asscheek. Once, twice, and then one on the other. 

Your wife smiled, delving in her superiority while you clenched your legs and quivered. 

“What is he doing?” Molly asked. 

“Trying to control himself.” She said, “he can’t help it, it drives him crazy. Every now and then i’ll pull my pants down just enough so he can get to kiss my bare ass, but only if he’s super good. He never gets to see me naked though, not anymore. That is all for Michael!”

Molly nodded as if she just said the most obvious thing ever. “Well you go have fun! Don’t worry about your little baby bitch husband! I’ll take great care of him!!”

Your wife smiled, gathered her things, said her goodbyes to you and Molly, and left through the door, leaving you with a 25 year old hotass babysitter with a very sadistic look in her eye. 

She bent over, hands to her knees, purring like a vixen with her prey caught in a trap. “Ohhh i’m going to have sooo much fun with you!” She pinched your cheeks, hard enough to make you whimper, shaking them back and forth. “You’re gonna be my little baby bitch for the rest of the night. I’ve got you alll to myself! You’re gonna waddle and crawl around in your filthy fucking pampers while I video you goo goo ga ga-ing for all my friends to see! I’m gonna strap you to your ridiculous highchair and force feed you mushy meals until you’re stuffed and have to use your Daddy’s milkies to wash it all down while wallowing in your own filth! You’re going to be playing in your playpen with a poopy diaper around your waist, wishing you could get the chance to kiss my pretty feet!”

She bent even closer, lowering her voice so as to emphasize her next point: “You’re mine now, do you understand me? Just because you have to be strapped to your crib by 7 doesn’t mean I can’t find plenty of ways to degrade and humiliate you until then!!”

That got you whimpering and shivering in fear. 

She laughed at your feeblish sniffles, straightening up to triumphantly tower over you. “So you like gym pants, huh?” She grinned, turning around to show you her blue, skin-tight leggings. She brought them inches from your face, so close you could still smell her sweat from her workout. 

“Kiss.” She commanded, jutting her butt out, “and keep kissing until you poop your stupid pamper! Then I'm going to make you rub your filth all over yourself before babysitter Molly has her fun with you!!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This was a custom caption created for one of my love subs on SubStar. If you'd like one of your very own, consider joining tiers Silver or higher!

[dietbongrip]

hi these are some of my favourite photos of hunter and his bitch wife mrs. michaels helmsley

[faun-the-fawn77]

"𝕃𝕀ℙ𝕊 𝕆𝔽 𝔸ℕ 𝔸ℕ𝔾𝔼𝕃"

Lucifer Morningstar x F!Angel!Reader

Genre: fluff and angst

Word count: 2.2k

Warnings: manipulation, gaslighting, fluff so sweet it'll hurt your teeth, ooc(?) Lucifer, reader hates Lilith, Lilith is a bitch, and so is Michael

Part Two

Desc: When Lucifer Fell, it wasn't because of his ideals or that he "fell in love" with Lilith OR that he tempted Eve with the Apple. Lilith was poison from the start and manipulated him into giving Eve the apple. He was devoted to one person in creation and that was his wife, Y/N. He was devastated when he Fell and when Lilith told him that Y/N couldn't love him anymore? That broke him. After years of no contact with Heaven, Lucifer let his daughter, Charlie, attend one of the meetings with Heaven for him. What Charlie didn't expect was for her fathers ex(?)lover to be there with Adam and Lute. Or that Charlie would learn more about her mother. She made sure her father would get back in contact with his long lost love. Lucifer got a phone call that night from someone... in Heaven? Now who could that be?

Note: Sorry for the long description but like- I need you guys to have context for my stories, especially song fics. I want to jump right into the music and writing so you guys will be getting extended summaries. Hope you stick around!

Another note: Poll at bottom once ur done reading! be sure to read the note at the end:)

Honey, why you calling me so late?

It’s kinda hard to talk right now

Honey, why you crying, is everything okay?

I gotta whisper ‘cause I can’t be too loud

The abrupt sound of “Highway To Hell” By AC/DC ringing out into the night is what woke the Devil from his slumber. He patted around the black wooden night stand for the loud contraption. His bleary eyes wincing at the brightness of the screen, he saw that the beginning of the number starts with (444). Squinting his eyes, he ran a clawed hand through his bed head and sat up. Glancing back at Lilith and then at the number from Heaven, he sighed and slipped his robe on, stumbling out the door and into his study. 

“What in the unholy Hell is someone from Heaven calling me for…” He hesitated for a second before swiping up and answering the call. 

There was no sound on the other end for a while before Lucifer growled and gripped his phone tighter, “If this is some kinda prank then I won’t hesitate to-” 

“Luci..?”

Lucifer held his breath. His mind raced a mile a minute once that voice came through the line. He closed his eyes shut to prevent the onslaught of tears to fall from his red eyes.

“Luci…please.” His breathing picked up. This wasn’t real. Some fucked up motherfucker was playing some sorta sick prank on him. There’s no way his wi- Ex…wife was calling him. Him! He went to hang up, thumb hovering over the red button when that gentle voice came through again, “Luci, it’s really me. Please don’t go…”

Lucifer bit his lip. He let out a shaky breath and brought the phone to his pointed ear. The sound of her labored breathing could be heard, like she was trying to not cry. 

“Y/N/N? Is…is this really you?” Sniffles were heard from the other end before soft laughter followed. Lucifer fell down into the loveseat near the window in his study. 

“Yes Luci, it’s really me.” The sound of his wife’s voice made Lucifer melt into the loveseat. It’s been eons since he’s heard her voice… and now he wants nothing more than to see her. To feel her. Hug her. Do everything with her.

“Honey, why’re you calling so late? Can’t you see the stars right now?” A sound came from Lucifer and Lilith’s shared room which caused the little Devil to silence himself before speaking again in a whisper, “It’s kinda hard to talk right now. Sorry, honey.”

It was quiet for a few seconds before whimpers and sniffles sounded on the other end. Y/N was crying. His darling wife was upset. 

Not knowing what to do at that point of time, Lucifer shushed her gently, “It’s okay, sweetheart. I’m right here. Is everything okay, honey? Why’re you crying?” Lucifer clutched his phone tightly. His eyes watered up at the thought of not being able to hold onto her. 

“I miss you, Luci. I miss you so much!” Her voice echoed in the study room. Lucifer pulled his phone away to listen, in case Lilith woke up from the noise. He put his phone back to his ear with a smile.

“I miss you too, darling. I’m sorry for being so quiet. I gotta whisper ‘cause I can’t be too loud at the moment.” Y/N hummed and he could hear the smile on her lips.

“Is it because of Charlie? Oh she is such a sweetie! Her and I-”

“Charlie? You met- How’d you meet Charlie?” Lucifer couldn’t fathom how his sweet apple met with his angelic wife. Y/N couldn't leave Heaven. After he Fell, he had heard from Adam that they kept Y/N on a tight leash to make sure she wouldn’t follow after him. 

“Oh! Said she had a meeting with Heaven! Said she and her wonderful girlfriend were sent by you to represent you!” That’s when it clicked. He had that phone call from Charlie a while back about wanting to go to Heaven to talk about her hotel to the higher-ups. Lucifer got her into Heaven that day. What he didn’t realise is that Charlie had a chance at meeting his wife. Or was she considered his ex? They never officially divorced and he and Lilith never married…

“Her idea is brilliant by the way,” Y/N whispered softly. This caught him by surprise. Surprise because he thought that his brother, Michael, would’ve brain washed her into thinking he was the bad guy. That he was evil incarnate.

“You…support it? Her dream?” Lucifer felt like shit. All this time, after hearing nonstop from his daughter about her hotel and plan, it took him getting a call from his wife to make him realize how shitty of a father he was. 

“I do.”

And that struck him in the heart. It was her first encounter with Charlie and she already supported her. Lucifer held a breath and released it after a few seconds. 

Well, my girl’s in the next room

Sometimes I wish she was you

I guess we never really move on

It’s really good to hear your voice saying my name

It sounds so sweet

Coming from the lips of an angel

Hearing those words, it makes me weak

And I never wanna say goodbye

But, girl, you make it hard to be faithful

With the lips of an angel

“It’s not because of Charlie…is it.” Lucifer perked up. 

“What?”

“The reason you have to be quiet.” Lucifer stilled. 

Lucifer couldn’t speak. The tone of voice Y/N had made him shiver. She sounded…numb. Empty. He knew then that she was referring to Lilith.

“She’s in the next room. She doesn’t know…” Lucifer couldn’t finish. He already hated this topic. Lilith was what caused this. Lucifer took a breath and whispered out, “I wish she was you, Y/N.”

He never moved on from Y/N. She was his everything. She will always be his one and only. His light. His angel. 

It was silent. Too silent. Lucifer chewed on his bottom lip with anxiousness. He knew when Y/N was upset and right now? Very upset. He remembered the first argument they had. Lucifer went down to the garden to welcome the two new humans his Father created. Adam was awed while Lilith had indifference. That intrigued Lucifer. Lucifer would talk to Adam about the stars while Lilith went off on her own to do whatever it is she does. One day, Lucifer followed after her. He found her in a flowering clearing with a pond. She was knelt next to it. Lucifer walked up to her and noticed that she was ripping the petals off the most beautiful of flowers.

“And why damage something with life that grew so beautifully?” Lilith looked up at the archangel and smirked. That should’ve been his first sign.

“They aren’t as beautiful as me though, right?” Lucifer hesitated before shaking his head. That should’ve been the second.

“No! You are… very pretty.” Lucifer didn’t want to get on this human’s bad side, “but that is no reason to rip off the petals. Envy is a sin.”

Lilith cackled at the last quip. If Lucifer had caught it, he would’ve realised that she was evil incarnate, not him. 

When Lucifer returned to Heaven after visiting the humans, he bumped into his wife at the Golden Gates. Her arms were crossed and her rosy lips were set into frown. 

“What’s wrong, my star?” Lucifer reached out only for Y/N to swat away the appendage. She glared at him and in a high pitched voice, mimicked Lilith, “They aren’t as beautiful as me though, right?”

Lucifer paled. He didn’t know she followed him down that day. He knew he was in the wrong. He should’ve stopped Lilith’s flirting. He should’ve stopped when he noticed how Lilith looked at him.

“Honey, I-”

“Save it. You should’ve known better, Lucifer. Women, even angelic ones like myself, are good at getting what we want.” Y/N walked off, back to their house. Lucifer felt terrible. He did know that. The angelic females in Heaven knew what they wanted and always got what they wanted, though what they wanted ranged from the sweetest things like new constellations or a new animal to be sent down to Earth that was of their own creation. 

“Lucifer, I di-”

“It’s really good to hear your voice, sweetheart. I can’t get enough of you saying my name again, even if we’re on a topic that upsets you,” Lucifer admitted. He could hear his wife choke a bit before giggling. 

“Oh yeah?”

Lucifer smirked, “Oh yes. Especially since they’re coming from the lips of a beautiful angel.”

He could hear her stuttering on the other end. He was proud of himself that he still had that effect on her. He was always the charismatic one. She was always the kind one. 

“I bet, Luci, that you’re still just as handsome as when you were here.” Lucifer felt his already reddened cheeks heat up more. Since when did his cute, shy, and sweet wife have this side to her?

“Hells, hearing you say that really makes me weak in the knees, sweetheart,” Lucifer groaned. His heart was beating faster and he felt his hands get clammy. He wanted her badly. 

Bed squeaking could be heard in the next room over which caused Lucifer to shut up. He waited with bated breath for the sound of footsteps but none ever came. He released the breath he was holding, running his claws through his tousled blonde hair. 

“I never wanna say goodbye, Luci,” Y/N’s voice sounded suddenly. Lucifer smiled. He never wanted this phone call to end either. He knew that next time there was a meeting with Heaven, he was going. 

It’s funny that you’re calling me tonight

And, yes, I’ve dreamt of you too

And does he know you’re talking to me?

Will it start a fight?

No, I don’t think she has a clue

Lucifer chuckled to himself. Something in himself thinks this is all a dream. That it’s not real. I mean, talking to his wife? He feels like he’s walking on clouds again.

“What’s so funny, mister?” And Hells, he’d never tire of her voice. 

“It’s just funny to me that I got a phone call from you of all angels. That you actually called after everything that happened…” Lucifer leaned back in the seat. His eyes shut and he rested his free hand over his eyes.

“Luci, I never believed Michael’s lies.” Lucifer sat up. His grip tightened on the black hellphone. 

“Never..? But I was told…”

“Whatever you were told was a lie. Lilith is a lying, manipulating bitch. When I saw her in the Garden with you I almost lost my cool. Do you know why she was so flirty? It’s because she saw me and wanted to piss me off. It worked, I’ll give her that.” Lucifer was stunned. Lilith knew? Y/N knew? Then why…

“I never told you because I wanted you to figure it out. I wanted you to realise how toxic she was. That she was using you to get to me. She knew you were the angel everyone talked about and wanted. And she wanted what others couldn’t have.” Lucifer felt that flicker of anger in his heart burst forth. His horns grew and his tail swished around angrily. His breathing was heavy. He wanted to storm into his bedroom and rid that piece of filth from existence!

“Luci! Don’t do anything yet…I have a plan.”

Lucifer settled down and sat back in the loveseat. He used his tail to hold the phone to his ear and clenched his fists to hold back the anger.

“What plan?”

“I can’t say right now… someone is listening.” Her voice lowered at the end. Lucifer understood that she was being watched so he kept his cool and changed topics. 

“You know…I’ve been dreaming of you. Every night since I fell.” Lucifer looked out the window of his study to see the blood red sky. The sight of Heaven made him sad. He wanted so badly to be up there with her once again.

“I’ve dreamt of you too, my light bringer.” Her voice was sweet. It was like honey and vanilla. Lucifer smiled. He could listen to her talk all day. Did he say that twice? Oh well, he was whipped.

“Does he… does Michael know you’re talking to me right now?” Lucifer almost regretted that question. 

“No, he doesn’t. He will when my plan goes through, though.” Lucifer smirked. He couldn’t wait to hear what his brother does when he learns that Y/N was talking to the Devil. He could already picture the steam blowing out his ears.

“And you’re positive that that witch doesn’t know that you are talking to me right now?” Lucifer chuckled at his wife’s bitterness at the mere mention of Lilith. 

“No, she doesn’t. She’s honestly a heavy sleeper.” Y/N hummed. That bit of info made her plan easier. 

“I want to talk more about Charlie! She’s just so sweet and she reminds me so much of you, hon.” Lucifer leaned forward in his seat and both started talking about the sweet creature that was Charlie Morningstar.

Well, my girl’s in the next room

Sometimes I wish she was you

I guess we never really moved on

It’s really good to hear your voice saying my name

It sounds so sweet

Coming from the lips of an angel

Hearing those words, it makes me weak

And I never wanna say goodbye

But, girl, you make it hard to be faithful

With the lips of an angel

That was my first attempt at writing Lucifer and i might have made him a bit to sweet? idk i personally think he'd be supper sweet to wife reader after everything that happened.

HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY!!!!

also: if you want a part two... VOTE! I wanna expand on this universe a bit so I'll need to find songs to match. Music is my love so almost all my fics will involve music someway or another:)

[king--of--ducks]

I am Lucifer Morningstar, King of Hell, sin of Pride!

🍎I am Lucifer Morningstar, but you can call me Luci’ or even Apple Daddy if you wish~🍎

🍎I have a daughter named Charlotte, but everyone calls her Charlie. And if anyone hurts her, well, I’ll fucking wipe them out. This is my game, I’m the ref!🍎

🍎Charlie has informed me that I, apparently, have fans on the internet? And I figured if there are people who love me out there, might as well talk to them! Take that depression!🍎

🍎No spamming walls of text/emojis in my ask!🍎

OOC:I have no association with Vivziepop or her characters, this is just an obsessed fan being bored and goofing off. Things will most likely be out of character at times, I’m just kinda having fun with this.

I also decided to edit my pinned post to add this bit. This blog has been covering sensitive topics lately such as sh, ed, sui, and more. If you are not comfortable with this, I try to tag the posts to the best of my feeble minded capabilities, but that is content you can find here, so be warned.

I have a Discord server

Oh wow, it’s lore!

Personal lore

The Morning(star)

The Scars of an Angel

A Brush with Death

A fateful farewell

The loss of a brother

Extra lore

A Heartfelt Message

The Blue-Gem series

The Blue-Gem series(2)

The Blue-Gem series(3)

The Blue-Gem series(4)

The Blue-Gem series(5)

Mod—

@sockmanduckman

Circle of role players—

Same mod—

@moxxies-wife—Blitzø’s employee #1

@mammon-money-maker—Nuisance

@wally-wackfords-wacky-blog—Blitzø’s old chum

@ace-loves-josh

@the-666-news

@wiener-warrior—Adam

@gossip-sipper

Family—

@charlie-morningstar666–My beautiful little girl!

@the-moth-ex-angel—Soon to be daughter in law!

@alyxdefoisnthere—Bad sleep schedule daughter.

@damian-morningstar—Son

@headlessdeaddancer—My (step-)son!

@mcalastor—fiancé Freaky ass bitch.

@god-the-lord—My father has Tumblr?!?!

@bigdoginthesky—Another dad

@theholymessenger—Gabriel

@theholyhealer—Raphael

@michael-the-morningstar—Michael

@heavenly--knight—Another Michael?!?!

@ask-the-archs—2 for 1

@featheryhoe—King of Lust

Other—

@blitztheoissilent—Blitzø (formerly @blitz-horsie-enthusiast and @blitz-the-o-is-silent)

@logical-imp—Blitzø’s employee #2

@ducky-loyal-servant-of-lucifer—Cure for depression

@xxsmilingdeerxx—Freak

@radio-demon-on-the-air—Freak *2

@fizzythefrog—Blitzø’s bestie

@blue-gem-overlord—Ripoff Lapis

@heavens-gatekeeper—Petah!!!!

@king-mammon—Another Mammon

@sad-bird-stolas—My bestie

@the-original-dickmaster—My best friend

@the-exterminator—Adam’s petty ex

@lute-head-exterminator—Adam’s petty ex*2

@bad-boy-lover—Niffty

@nifftyhasaknife—Niffty*2

@penguinmaster9999—T and pals

@deadbeatbartender—Husker

[alexxncl]

‼️NIGHTBRINGER LESSON 41 SPOILERS‼️

masterlist | all lessons| season 2 | season 3 | lesson 40 | lesson 41.2 | lesson 42.1 | lesson 42.2

WE'RE HOME BITCHES

i missed my boys but i also feel bad for the nb!timeline boys bc they'll never see us again :( i miss them

HSHGDHDGD they're so stupid 😭 and ik they knew it was mammon's handwriting bc there's no way they didn't

:((((( i think i mentioned this in my lesson 40 breakdown but this is literally a physical manifestation of the login screen dialogue:

"my love for you transcends time"

if i was mc i'd be BAWLING y'all don't understand

this bg gives me war flashbacks to lesson 76 🫠 sad times man

PLEASE where did this come from 😭 everyone was all nostalgic and crying and shit and then he comes and pulls this outta his ass

NOT HE CALLED MAMMON A BROKE ASS BITCH (we been knew)

but on another note, how does he know the wallet is light if it's levitating ??? like does he feel the heaviness bc he's making it float or is he just bullshitting to piss mammon off 😭

giggling, kicking my feet, i missed her 🫶🏽 my wife, the loml

yk this would be a great time to have our affinity with her go up 😐 COUGH COUGH 😐 why isnt she dateable yet

isn't he canonically really good at math ??? like aside from just counting money

even tho it definitely comes from his greed

they're always downplaying his good qualities 🫠 hate it here /j

also side note, him getting assigned geography is a SET UP like 😭 we all know this man can't focus for the life of him. at LEAST give him math so he'd have a chance 💀

mc and mammon are ESPECIALLY cooked bc dia and barb decided to be tryhards and join every part of the competition

mc better than me bc i'd fight a bitch if he just up and left me after all the stuff that happened in the other timeline 😭 fym you're in the human world while i'm down here struggling

where did all of his development go ???? the whole season 3 arc where luke, mammon, and mc were on a train (?) together and luke learned to let go of his biases just got erased ig

Y'ALL WHAT IF HE BECOMES A DEMON

or what if it's michael messing with him even though he's fallen ??? the teaser has me paranoid idk

ANYWAYS overall 10/10 comeback lesson (i'm biased and i missed my boys 🫶🏽)

(i feel like the bonus story of the normal lesson needed its own post bc...😭)

[koji-haru]

Time Travel AU: Prologue

Ah, well here goes my first attempt at a fic. Hopefully it's somewhat enjoyable 🙇‍♀️.

Fuck.

This was not how the day was supposed to go. Adam and his exorcists were supposed to come down from heaven to deliver some holy cleansing, destroy Lucifer’s spawn’s shitty hotel, and remind these losers their place. This was supposed to be a fun day! A stress reliever! Entertainment! But now those same losers surrounded him and his girls as he laid on the ground, golden ichor escaping his body. That fucking midget cyclops - where the hell did she come from?! Lucifer too. Since when did he give a shit about sinners?! 

What a shit show. Lute held Adam with her remaining arm, mouthing words that just didn’t seem to fully form in his head. The colour slowly drained from his face, his body felt heavier, and everything seemed to just slowly blur into one image. All he could focus on was Lute’s face, tears freely fell down her cheeks, her body trembling as she desperately clung onto Adam willing him to stay with her. With the last of his strength, Adam gave her a soft smile - one he reserved for those he truly cared about. His ending could be worse, at the very least Lute was there with him until the end.

As much as he hated leaving his girls to their fates, eternal peace was something Adam welcomed. Sure heaven was well… heavenly. While he did enjoy what he did, it was at times stressful, and those higher up angels with sticks up their asses didn’t make it any better. 

Finally.

…

…

…

A gentle breeze whistling between the leaves, birds singing in the background, the warm hug of the sunlight on his bare skin as the soft grass cushioned him. This felt familiar. Was this his life flashing before his eyes? Sure, Adam experienced something similar on his first death, but on that one he felt like he was floating, not really in control of anything, like watching a movie of his life. This one…it felt a little too grounded.

“Wake up”.

What the fuck. That sounds too real. 

“It’s time to open your eyes”.

Is that..? Nope. I’ll just lay here, it’ll go away soon.

…

“Um…did we make a mistake? Maybe he’s not finished yet”.

“No, he should be complete. The woman woke up just fine”.

A soothing presence inched closer and Adam felt a soft hand caress his cheek, “Come on, you can do it”. 

Adam peeked one eye open. What in Father’s holy name. He opened both eyes, blinking several times, even rubbing them just to make sure he was seeing right. Kneeling beside him was Sera, smiling at him with a warmth that he hasn’t felt in years. They were in a circle surrounded by the other seraphim: Gabriel, Michael, Uriel, Raphael, and of course, that snake, Lucifer. Just the sight of him made Adam's blood boil, but he kept his features cool, his body relaxed as he sat up guided by Sera's gentle hands.

“There you are,” Sera smiled as she stood up, brushing off some invisible dirt off her pristine dress. “You are Adam, and this is your new home, the Garden of Eden. You along with your wife, Lilith, will govern these lands gifted to you by your creator, God”. At the mention of her name, Lilith appeared from behind Michael and walked towards Adam, her violet eyes shining with purpose, long blonde hair swaying behind her as she carried herself with an aura of grace and beauty. Adam simply remained seated on the ground, tight lipped, eyes fixed on Lilith's form.

“Aw, he seems to be captivated by the first woman. How adorable,” Raphael whispered to Gabriel, who looked like he’d rather be anywhere else. 

As if, this bitch is literally one of the last people I ever want to see.

Sera guided Lilith’s hand unto Adam’s, “Well then, I’ll leave you two to become acquainted with each other”. 

And with that, bright light enveloped the seraphim until all that remained in the garden were Adam and Lilith.

As soon as the angels were gone, Adam quickly pulled back his hand away from Lilith. Gross. He slumped back on the soft grass, his right arm covering his eyes, hoping that if he closed his eyes again he'd return to reality. 

…

“Adam?”

…

“Is something wrong?”

Yeah, you. Adam sighed heavily. It seemed like this was his waking reality now.

This was not how the day was supposed to go.

Part 1

[imtryingbuck]

Prologue

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x OFC!Theo

Summary: Bucky has to marry a woman who surprises him more and more as their story goes along.

Word count: 726

Warnings: angst? forced marriage. Bucky's dads the worst.

Masterlist   Series Masterlist

Of course Bucky has thought about marriage, dreamt about coming home after a long day at work to his wife cooking dinner or happily playing with the kids, slow dancing with her throughout the house whilst the children are tucked in bed. Sharing his dreams, fears, stories and life with his other half, a wife who he can spoil with gifts and love.

A wife he can hold during the night.

Another dream he's always had, having children, he's not picky about the gender (not like he can control it) as long as they are healthy, and he's happy to have as many as his wife wants.

So yes Bucky has thought about marriage.

The dream of having a wife will be coming true sooner than he anticipated however being forced to marry a complete stranger is something he's very against, all he's ever wanted was to marry for love.

He's furious and feels betrayed by his father who just told him he has to marry one of the daughters of another mafia boss, that in marrying her it will secure an alliance.

Michael Murdock who's notoriously known for being ruthless and cunning. A man who happily gets his hands bloody, a man who rules his empire with an iron fist. From what Bucky knows of the man's family is that he has a wife Eliza and from what he's heard is that she's just as bad as her husband. They have two sons Brandon and Matt, and four daughters Carla, Olivia, Marie and Lucy.

Then there's Theodora, the daughter that he had with a mistress who died after the baby was born. However no one has ever seen her or even heard about her, most people think she's a myth. A story that gossipers had made up to keep people entertained.

The thought of being married to one of Michaels daughters made him feel physically sick. He had seen photos of them in magazines or on the internet of their latest trip to the plastic surgeon, or of their lifestyles.

Don't get him wrong he lives a lavish life but has never once flaunted it and he likes his women more natural.

The idea of being married into the Murdock family and having Michael as his father in law makes his skin crawl despite his father telling him that he'd always be protected.

Reluctantly getting into the car, muttering under his breath as he goes.

"James you need this, you've taken over the business now and you need a wife by your side. Stop acting like a child" his father George speaks from the other side of the Range Rover.

"I don't know her. She's not even going to want this."

"It doesn't matter what she wants son, you are the man of this marriage. Marry her, keep her wallet full, and have your mistresses and if she steps out of line just smack her back into place" he chuckles as he continues to text on his phone.

Instead of responding Bucky pushes himself further into the leather seat.

As the car pulls up to a huge manor that sits behind large steel fences, the double gates have an 'M' on each sides. Bucky notices that there are many high branded, expensive cars all lined neatly on the grey stone gravel. There's a marbled fountain in the middle that had neatly placed flowers circling around it.

The last time Bucky was nervous was when he was nineteen, it was he first official meeting he was holding on his own. No matter what situation he found himself in he was always calm and confident, but still sitting inside the warm, matte black Range Rover he's doing everything in his power not to be sick.

"Dad is this really necessary?" He tries, he knows it himself that it's pointless but he's still going to try.

"I swear you should have been born a girl with how much you bitch and moan."

"But dad this is my lif-"

"Stop crying it's your wedding day" George smiles sarcastically as the car comes to a stop in front of the many steps.

Bucky, his father and bodyguards are lead up the steps and into the high ceiling hallway, their greeted by Michael, who's standing there with a large grin on his aging face.

"Welcome to my home and family".

Next>

Tags: @sapphirebarnes

[bloogers-boogers]

Hi! I have a lil au idea for you! Pretty much my first idea for Adam and Michael. Get the popcorn 'cause this is gonna be long.

Lucifer and Michael were quite invested in the two humans. Lucifer kept drooling over Lilith but Michael was the opposite. Something about Lilith's attitude just pissed him off. She was quite arrogant and bossy, always shooing his lover away or ordering him around to make him go away then telling Lucifer something else. Adam from the first moment adored Michael and Lucifer but Lilith also hated Michael.

Michael once made the mistake of calling Lilith out on her behaviour. A fight between Lucifer and Michael broke out. Fortunately it was broken up by Sera and no one got seriously hurt. Adam tried to ignore all the things Michael said but some things started to click. Adam distanced himself from Lilith and Lucifer.

Michael got punished, worsening his punishment by arguing with the elders about Lilith. He felt betrayed. They used to stand by him. They used to trust him but now, things are changing. Michael started to leave his office less and less 'til another fight broke out between Michael and Sera. Michael ended up leaving to the garden to meet Adam again. Adam told him that Lucifer told him that he is getting a new wife. A woman named "Eve". Michael was surprised. No one even told him about it. Lucifer and Lilith in the meantime are living their best lives in the garden. Eve was created and Adam hell for her like no other. He was finally happy.

Lilith got jealous and asked Luci to help him.

A couple of days went by and Adam was going to his lover with Michael to introduce him to her. They've found Eve but...she was on top of Lucifer, both of them red in the face. Michael was furious with his brother.

Eve tried to explain but all Adam said to her was "You're just like her" then ran away from the scene. Michael asked Lucifer if he was proud of himself but before Lucifer could answer, his brother was already gone.

Michael went after Adam and had an idea on the way. Maybe he could help Adam get revenge. Michael forged up an idea to manipulate Eve into eating the apple.

They did just that. Lilith got curious after seeing Eve's change in personality and ate the apple as well.

The elder angels found out and banished Eve and Lilith onto Earth, giving them help to create humanity on their own but other than that, they were on their own.

Michael and Adam were banished to hell for what they've done.

A long time later, Adam and Michael had a daughter, Charlie...

Ik it's just a swap au but it's kinda fun. I haven't yes Adam AND Michael in the places of Lucifer and Lilith yet.

Have a rose for reading all this:🌹

DUDE I SWEAR I READ THIS LIKE THREEE TIMES ALREADY I’m such a sucker for swap au and let me tell u this is the type of fic I’d read omygod lsbelwbdwñeb 💖💖💖

I love the idea that initially Lilith would hate Michael but eventually grow to like him once Adam deals settles in heaven (so not only Adam speaks of him but she has to meet up with him in the meetings so she eventually starts developing feelings for the king of hell), so in the exterminations maybe she’s the leader of the exterminators now? And she’d go there and try provoking Michael and flirting but Michael is so down bad for Adam he doesn’t even bat an eye!

Lucifer is literally being cucked as a great karma for what he did to Adam in this au! Like, Lilith is no longer in love with him but uses him to hold power in heaven (she literally picked Eve over him back in the garden). She also flirts with Adam at his arrival albdwlsbwlw at first it was just to be a bitch to him but eventually she genuinely wanted to score him. (but ofc Adam was only annoyed by her advances.)

Adam deal has something to do to protect his family so he’s forced to be up there but he’s still madly in love with Michael, though, he’s also force to be around Lucifer a lot more (the angel would look for him, *cough cough* he’s enthralled by the first man. Also bc this is kinda of a great excuse for him to speak with his brother which he misses to inform him of Adam’s doings.) Adam is not allowed to be with Michael, speak with his daughter or in hell unfortunately.

Eve whereabouts still remains a mystery (but Adam knows where she is. I feel they somehow made up at some point and are acquaintances at the very least.)

And I feel Michael’s way of dealing with his depression unlike Lucifer’s who tries to avoid his responsibilities and locks himself away, Michael will indulge with them and even add more to the pile, working nonstop. Shutting himself in his office (instead of workshop) and be like this workaholic king who shuts down any possibility of distractions and family time (poor Charlie…) he may even do the opposite of Lucifer who was always hiding in his castle, while Michael would rarely ever be home! Like traveling through all rings dealing with deals, meetings and all that stuff.

Either way I NEED MORE OF THIS OMYGOD 🔥🔥💖

[divine0rdainment]

IMMA WRITE SOME FANFICS!

So imma try and write some more fanfictions soon. Attempt is the correct word becuse my ADHD is a bitch. But I was wondering which of my Au's you'd like to see written about first. Imma share the ones I like the most below and if you guys have a specific interest in one, please Comment the ones you'd like to see. I'll set up a Pole to have people vote on based on which Au's have the most people interested and work from there.

Now for the aus, I'll write the name of the au and description so you know what I'm talking about.

1) Taking What Is Forbidden (Continuation)

I already wrote two chapters for this but I have a few ideas I could expand on after, but in summery, An Eden au where Adam eats the apple of knowledge on purpose to find a way to make Lucifer fall in love with him, (or straight up force his angel in to isolation with him) resulting in them both falling. Heavily implied Yandere Demon King Adam vibes.

2) Operation Replace Lilith AU

Adam dies and goes back in time to the day he was created and has the brilliant idea of seducing Lucifer in order to get Lucifer to take him to hell Instead of Lilith, and not have the same death he had in his last life (Lucifer beating the shit out of him and then being stabbed by Nifty.) Too bad he's bad at flirting and Lucifer is accidently great at it. And now he may have to accept the fact he's not so straight.

3) Paradise Found au

Michael and Lucifer switch roles, and Michael ends up going to hell with Lilith, while Adam, after his death, ends up married to Lucifer in heaven since Lilith was sent to purgatory. He's still an exterminator in this time lone and Lucifer is part of the High Angelic Council. They have two daughters (Lute and Charlie) who are both working along side them and they have found their happy ending... Till Emily, the daughter of Michael and Lilith shows up with her plans for "redemption" and Charlie's missing girlfriend. Then everything the two built falls apart in ways they can't control.

4) Lucifers Labyrinth AU

Adam is a single dad of 4 kids who are very irritated at him when he misses a big school event. After a big argument, one of the kids make a wish that end up sending the four kids and Adam to the demon realm. The king of the realm, Lucifer, makes a deal with Adam that if he can make it to the center of Lucifers very very large labyrinth and get his kids to forgive him, he will let Adam take them home. But if he fails, he and the kids would be trapped in the Demon Realm forever. Turns out, Lucifer just had a crush on Adam and wants to convince him to stay willingly but doesn't understand humans well.

5) Charlie is The DM Au (Multiple Ships in this)

Basicly, Sinner Adam, Lucifer, Vaggie, Husk, and Angel play DND with Charlie as a bonding exercise every week. They each have their own characters and get to tell a fun story full of weird interactions and funny dialogue, but all while telling a good story that helps them with their real life problems in hell too. Alastor joins soon to cause even more problems in game. (May actually make Character sheets for everyone to share in case you like them)

6) Mafia Bodyguard Au

Another Single father Adam au, where Adam is struggling with a group of kids (under the age of 10k after his wife Eve died. He is Ex military and is too filled with PTSD and stress to figure out how to survive as he is. Luckily his ex wife, Lilith, comes to see him at a bar and offer him a job working for her second Ex husband as a bodyguard to their child, Charlie. In doing so he'd get free housing, schooling, medical increase, food, and even a fully bullet proof car. All Adam has to do is work for the Morningstar Mafia. Oh, by the way, her ex husband is the leader of said Mafia. Adam accepts for his kids sake, and shit goes crazy from there

7) She's Just a Baby Au

(also known as I'm Just A Man Au)

During the war between Heaven and hell, Adam is told by Sera that Lucifer and Lilith had created a nephilim. An abomination that, according to the higher angels, will spell misfortune for Heaven and Hell, and sends Adam on a secret mission to destroy this monster. When Adam gets there during a battle outside of Lucifers castle, he finds the monster in question and realizes it's just a baby, a demon like baby, but still a baby. He tries to bring himself to kill her and can't, and instead protects her till Lucifer comes back. Lilith dies in the battle sadly, so now Charlie only has her father. But Adam, now breaking heavens orders a second time, knows he can't go back. So Lucifer lets him stay. The two raise charlie together.

8) Testing Love Potions Au (One Shot)

Velvette was making a love potion in her office during an extermination, only for Adam to slam in to her office, preparing to killed her. To defend herself, Velvette broke his mask and hit him in the face with a love potion. And before he can open his eyes, she escapes. Adam sees Lucifer on a billboard and instantly is stricken with love. Chaos happens. And Lucifer is VERY confused. Especially since his wife just left him last year to go to heaven.

So please do tell me your opinions! Tell me which ones you'd like to read first! I hope to do all of them, but I gotta start so where!

[bubblegumbarbie33]

Another The Lost Boys Incorrect Quotes Post

David: They hate me for being a slut tbh and maybe the killings too but that's unlikely.

@pathologising

-

Star: Woman? No, you misheard, I'm an omen. I don't identify as male or female, I identify as a warning.

@generalgrievousdatingsim

-

David: The sexual tension between me and disappearing with an explanation.

@bvbbydoll

-

Michael, sitting in the lap of his hot vampire boyfriend: I've wanted to be a trophy wife since I was a little boy.

@a-seiji

-

Paul: When you high and the world feels 3D.

Star: It is.

Paul: On God?

@sonypraystation

-

David: Attempted murder is a form of intimacy by the way. Don't listen to anyone who tells you different.

@godsfavspike

-

Sam: I'm going to defeat you with the power of friendship and this gun I found.

@the-quasar-hero

-

David: Stop calling me a bad person just because I'm orchestrating your downfall.

-

Edgar Frog: Sure! Blame the guy who's a huge idiot and causes a lot of problems, again.

@reallyreallyreallytrying

-

Michael: How is 'pretty boy' supposed to be an insult I'm the prettiest goddamn boy in town.

@elfiot

-

Marko: Teehee lol. *lunges at your throat*

-

David: I'm such a man who leans in doorways. Relaxes against the counter. Drapes across the couch. Sprawls over an armchair. My spine isn't straight and neither am I.

@bagginshield

-

Star, glaring at Marko: You are a fool. When you walk, clown music plays.

@garfieldtaxidermy

-

Sam, wandering around the vamp hotel: Just because I broke into your house doesn't mean imma take something, maybe i just wanna look around damn.

@halodite

-

Star, referring to herself: Any guy can be a babygirl but it takes a man to be a single mother.

-

Allan Frog: Bite the vampire first to establish dominance.

@tainbocuailnge

-

Paul, picking on Star: You used to be shy, now you're a whore.

Star: Character development.

@xcurrerbellx

-

David: Sorry I called you a fucking idiot I was trying to flirt.

@dont-give-a-fuck-club

-

David and Star, sharing the same braincell: I couldn't fix him, but I could fuck him.

@slasherdean

-

Dwayne: "I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy." I would. Pussy

Paul: "I'm not gonna sink to their level." I will. Coward

Marko: "I'm the bigger person." I'm 5'7". Give me the gun bitch

@the-stray-liger

-

Star, staring at David: There is something deeply, fundamentally wrong with you.

Michael, also staring at David: Can we kiss.

@authcenter

[aprill-99]

EACH BRIDGERTON COUPLE AS JOHN MULANEY QUOTES:

Daphne & Simon:

Daphne: “A friend of mine asked me if I’d ever been given the sex talk, and the answer is yes… I think.”

Simon: “My father was COOOLD BLOODED.” + “Does my best friend hate me or do I just need to go to sleep?”

Kate & Anthony:

Anthony: “I’ll keep all my emotions right here and then one day, I’ll die.”

Kate: “Get out of here with your facts. Just because you’re accurate does not make you interesting.” + “I’m new in town, and it gets worse.”

Benedict & Sophie:

Benedict: “This is a healthy twenty-eight year old man trying his best.”

Sophie: “I was a maid for a while. I was treated well in my day. I worked for a variety of sirs.”

Colin & Penelope:

Colin: “My wife is a bitch and I like her soooooo much.”

Penelope: “We spend most of our time proving to people that we are who we say we are. Think about that for 10 seconds and tell me you don’t want to walk into the ocean.” + “People say crazy things all the time. And those things mean nothing to them, but they mean everything to me.”

Phillip & Eloise:

Eloise: “Thirteen year olds will make fun of you, but in an accurate way.”

Philip: “It was like, you know one of those days where you just go ‘this might as well happen.’”

Michael & Francesca:

Francesca: “I try to stay optimistic, but I will admit, things are getting pretty sticky.”

Michael: “We don’t get better than this. It’s just going to be worse versions of me from here on out.” + “And if you think I seem unlikable or out of control in that story, then just remember, that’s one I was willing to tell you.”

Hyacinth & Gareth:

Hyacinth: “Well none of us ever really know our fathers…… Anyway-”

Gareth: “I am very small. And I have no money. So you can imagine the kind of stress I am under.”

Lucy & Gregory:

Gregory: “I do hear you, and I also don’t want to be doing what I’m doing.”

Lucy: “In terms of instant relief, canceling plans is like heroine.”

Lady Danbury & Lord Ledger:

Lady Danbury: “Shut up you’re all going to die! Street smarts!” + “It’s wrong to make fun of people, but it’s just so fun sometimes.”

Lord Ledger: “My vibe is like ‘hey you could pour soup in my lap and I’d probably apologize to you.’”

George & Charlotte:

King George: “it seems like everyone, everywhere, is super mad about everything, all the time.”

Queen Charlotte: “I simply do not give a shit what anybody thinks of me in any situation.”

Bonus:

Violet: “Putting a thirteen year old in charge of your younger kids is like getting a dog to babysit your horse. If something goes wrong, they can just maybe get help a little more quickly.”