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#might stay home for the first half of school just because
saltedsolenoid · 2 years
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it's rather hard to share food with someone when there's nobody there
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dearsnow · 2 months
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12:29 AM
- your normally sober husband comes home drunk out of his mind after a party, and you can’t say that he’s any less sweet. (robert “bob” floyd x wife!reader, fluff, honestly one of the cutest things i’ve ever written, ⚠️ obviously heavy themes of alcohol and being drunk, sexual innuendos but nothing graphic)
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word count: 1,502
a/n - i haven’t written a fic with a timestamp as the title in… (checks old blog) over three years?!? in any case, i hope you guys like drunk!bobby as much as i do <3 he’s definitely an emotional/clingy drunk imo.
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It’s not often that your husband stays out late, and it’s not often that he doesn’t text you while he’s out, but you trust him. He’s not the type to get blackout drunk or come home stumbling through the doorframe. Robert Floyd is a clearheaded and strong man.
Well, he looks neither right now, as he’s supported by Jake and Javy’s arms, glasses slipping off the bridge of his nose and a dopey smile brightening his face. Jake looks at you apologetically— as apologetic as he can get for a situation that’s likely his fault. “Sorry, hun.” He huffs, shifting around Bob’s weight. “There were a few too many fruity drinks ordered, and I guess he didn’t realize they were full of alcohol.”
“You guess?” You ask, rubbing the space between your eyebrows with your fingers. The two more sober men lead Bob into your bedroom, half-dragging him. They lay him down on your shared bed with a softened thump that has him groaning on top of the sheets. “I can’t believe you guys.”
Bob went out with the rest of the squad for some coworker’s promotion celebration, and he promised to come home perfectly sober, as always. He doesn’t even need to promise, if you’re being honest, because that’s just how he is; the most levelheaded person in the room. He would stay until it was socially acceptable for an acquaintance to leave, then he would head home and help you cook dinner to your favorite old school tunes. You never expected to see him shitfaced at 12:29 AM.
Javy shakes his head as he steps around you, taking Jake for a clean escape. “We tried to warn him. I hope he feels better in the morning, but until then, we’re gonna have to leave him with you.”
You sigh, eyebrows just as pinched as they were before. For the first time ever, you’re scared that Bob is going to die in his sleep, and the thought frustrates you to no end. “Thanks. It’s so great that he’s drunk out of his mind, but I have to give you credit for getting him here in one piece.” Your tone is sarcastic enough to get the two men cringing in shame, but you also know that without them, he might still be at that party.
Jake pats you on the shoulder. “Good luck, soldier. You’ll need it.”
With that, Javy and Jake walk out of your bedroom, past your living room, and out of your house like they couldn’t wait to leave. As you hear them close the door, you look down at your husband.
He’s still conscious, thankfully. His eyes are slightly unfocused, he’s blushing like a madman, and he’s groaning lightly, but he’s not completely gone yet. You brush the damp hair away from his forehead and he whines just a bit.
“Wife.”
You quirk your eyebrow in confusion. “Yes?”
“I… have a wife. Y’ can’t touch me like that.” He mumbles. It feels like he’s looking past you. Despite everything, you feel like laughing.
You adjust his glasses on his face and lean over him a little more, fully in his field of vision. “I am your wife.”
His eyes widen like he’s seeing you for the first time, and he smiles crookedly. He tries to sit up, but only manages to prop himself up on one arm as he takes in the sight of your face. “S’ pretty. You’re really my wife? My girl?” In combination with the slurred words of someone down in the cups, the slight southern accent he took so much time to push away is coming back as he speaks to you.
“Yes.” You confirm, kissing him on the cheek. He somehow smiles even wider and reaches out to touch the apples of your cheeks.
“Love you. I missed you.” He mumbles. “Spent that whole party wonderin’ when I could see you again.” He flops back down onto the springy mattress, throwing his arms up. He moves with the precision of a toddler, his limbs seemingly coated in lead. He almost smacks the glasses off his face as he motions to you with grabby hands.
“I missed you too, honey. Can we get you into your pajamas? I’m sure you don’t want to sleep in jeans and a polo.” As you ask that question, his fingers are already attempting to pull the shirt off of his body. It doesn’t work very well, considering he’s still laying down, but you appreciate the effort. “Sit up, my love.”
He sits up, winking at you heavily. It’s more like a slow blink with how long it takes him to do it. “Can’t wait to get me naked?”
A laugh escapes your mouth, and you smother the rest of your giggles with the heel of your palm as you gaze at his slightly crestfallen face. He’s funny when drunk, apparently, even when he isn’t trying to be. It’s like seeing him completely unhinged with none of his usual, careful filters. “Sure. You need to be in some state of undress to get your pajamas on, anyways.”
His face falls into a slight pout as you help him unbutton the top of his polo and slide it up his chest. He seems to notice how your hands hesitate when meeting the warm, taut skin of his abs, and the pout fades instantly. “Like it?”
“I always do.” You hum. He does have a great body, one that you’ve found to be extraordinarily hot. Strong arms, tight muscles, and yet a gentleness in the way his hands hold yours. Right now, though, it’s a bit of a problem as you’re attempting to get his jeans off. He’s still sitting, and you think you could lift weights for ten years and not be able to pull them out from under him. “Can you stand, Bobby?”
“Gladly.” He sings. You help him stand, supporting a bit of his weight. He seems to find a little bit of his footing as his other arm presses into the wall, allowing the both of you to shimmy his pants down his legs and kick them to some unknown corner of the room.
You gather his neatly folded pajamas, a soft shirt and some plaid flannel pants, and help him put them on. Luckily for you, he’s been revitalized by your touch and is a little more helpful now. He’s still moving awkwardly and shifting around like he’s constantly trying to get his balance straightened out, but it’s better than nothing. It would be hell to get him to do anything other than dress, though, so you settle for just getting him in bed. His dental hygiene routine will have to wait.
You lay him back down after he’s dressed and pull the blankets up to his chin, kissing his forehead gently and tucking his glasses in your dresser drawer. You’re already ready for the night (the perks of thinking he would come home three hours ago), so you slip in bed next to him. He immediately pulls you into his arms, his body comfortingly warm. He’s always run just a little hot, which is amazing on cooler nights like this.
He sighs contentedly before moving to stare directly into your eyes. “Y’know,” he starts, “I can’t sleep without your arms ‘round me, and your legs ‘round me, and you breathing all sweet on my neck. ‘M up all night when I’m deployed, at first anyways. My carrier roommates hate it.”
You shift just enough as to where your body is clutching on to him as tight as possible, and he hums in relief. It’s like the little tension that he was holding dissipated entirely. “I’m sorry, baby. That must be hard.” You soothe.
“Payback gave me his pillow once so I could wrap it in my arms, but it didn’t help. He threatened to ‘come up there n’ cuddle me himself’ if I didn’t stop moving.” He scrunches his eyes closed at the memory. You do your best to suppress another bout of laughter, but he makes it even harder when he shivers like he isn’t covered in three layers of blankets and you.
“Did he ever follow through?” You ask, pressing your lips together to stop from smiling. Bob shakes his head.
“Thank god he didn’t.” He utters. You turn to shove your face into your pillow to muffle your expressions. He just keeps his eyes closed, completely unaware of the fact that you’re losing it next to him.
When you finally come up for air, he is drifting in and out of sleep. “Love ya. G’night.” He whispers. It’s so soft that you almost start laughing again.
“Good night, Bobby. Love you too.” You say, kissing his cheek. You click off the lamp on your bedside table and snuggle deeper into his grasp.
He’s going to have one hell of a hangover in the morning. At least he’ll have his wife, breakfast in bed, and an aspirin to take care of him.
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Taglist: @seitmai
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halfmoonshines · 5 months
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soft spot
damon salvatore x reader
summary; you're injured in a fight with a rogue vampire who breezed into town, and Damon is being weird about it
hurt/comfort
----
You tried to stay hidden in the shadows outside of the streetlight, but your rapid heartbeat probably would've given you away either way.
"Who the hell is this guy?" You heard Damon mutter from the spot he was tossed just a few feet away from you, dusting the dirt from the trash cans he'd squished like cardboard. His ice blue eyes spared you a quick glance but didn't say a word, trying not to draw any attention your way.
Damon intervened as Caroline was struggling to grapple with the stranger. In the span of a moment, she was on the ground groaning with a broken arm and he had launched the assailant to give them a chance to regroup - right toward you.
You couldn't help the little gasp that you emitted, no matter how much time you spent around these creatures this was a vampire. One in particular who would have no hang ups about snapping your neck.
Per their supernatural hearing, it didn't take long for the mans vicious senses to find you, and took half as long for him to have a bruising hand around your neck.
The sound of Damon yelling your name was distant in the background, you were focused on the threat literally snarling in your face.
"Don't you smell good?"
That was as far as the stranger managed to get before Damon had the broken handle of a broom protruding from his back. His grip slipped off your throat as his body slid sideways and you toppled to the ground, heading bouncing off the pavement hard enough for you to see stars.
Damon's voice was faint to you again, but you could hear him begging for your attention. Caroline was in the background too, in panicked discussion with someone over the phone. You couldn't get your eyes to focus though, hair becoming wet and warm.
The eldest Salvatore's touch on you was feather light, his mouth still moving with words he wanted you to latch onto but you had already lost the dance with consciousness.
⋆。˚ ☁︎ ˚。⋆。˚☽˚。⋆
The first thing you were aware of when you woke up in a bed was that it was decidedly not yours. The next thing you noticed was that you weren't in any pain, just a bit stiff when you went to sit up from the bed. Someone had definitely given you blood, which was against every rule her and her friends had discussed, but from the smell of the sheets behind you - Damon wouldn't have cared either way.
You made your way out of the room and down the stairs, vaguely knowing the layout of the boarding house from your handful of times actually coming inside. Over the last few months you had become dangerously intertwined in Elena's grapple with the supernatural, despite Bonnie's vehement advice to go as far as possible. You were emancipated, you could switch schools and move to Pennsylvania.
No, you couldn't. Once your conscious had been opened to everything around you, once you were aware of the dangers of the dark - you could never ignore that. Better the evil you know.
Speaking of.
You came upon Damon in his favorite spot, a tumbler of bourbon in his hand while he leaned up against the fireplace. The suit jacket he had been wearing earlier that night was discarded on the couch behind him, a small amount of blood on the collar of his shirt still.
"You always look so broody." Poking fun at him might not be in your best interest, but you figured you'd give it a go. Over the last few months, your and Damon's relationship had morphed into something you couldn't quite understand, but moments like these had seemed to become more comfortable between you.
"I believe you're confusing me with my much broodier younger brother." Damon's words were laced with sarcasm, but his tone didn't have a hint of amusement.
You felt suddenly awkward, in his space and home. Just because you had gotten kind of comfortable lately didn't mean he wanted to be around you.
"Well, thanks for the whole life saving thing." You began to babble nervously, a faint pink glow to your cheeks. "I'll get out of your hair. Sorry for taking your bed, I don't even know what time it is-" You had begun turning toward the door, making to just leave and find a way home. How you could this age and still flustered in front of attractive men, especially murderous ones was beyond you.
Damon appearing in front of you almost made your heart stop, hair stirring at his incredibly fast movements. He was barely a foot away, his piercing gaze holding your confused one. From this close you could smell just how much he had probably drank.
"Are you... okay, Damon?" Your voice wavered a bit under the heat of his stare and you saw the muscle in his jaw working overtime while he looked like he was debating whether or not he wanted to actually say anything to you.
"You don't have to thank me for saving you when you were in danger because of me." His eyes had drifted from your eyes to your neck, voice whisper quiet.
Vulnerability was the last thing you expected from the man standing over you. "What do you mean? It wasn't your fault. Just wrong place, wrong time and I so happen to be the weakest link." You hoped your voice conveyed even a bit of humor.
His eyes snapped back up to yours, head tilting slightly while he assessed you. Damon's hand rose to grab a lock of your hair, twirling it around his finger in thought. Your breath caught in your throat, feeling like you were on the precipice of something.
"My weakest link, maybe. Have I told you how much I like your hair?" His voice was still quiet, an innocent lilt.
Your mind was reeling, half drunk on his closeness and hazed by confusion. Where was this coming from? Had he drank a small liquor store and now he was confusing her for her much more appealing best friend?
"Damon, I'm not sure how much you've had to drink, but I'm happy to brew you a pot of coffee. Does that even work for vampires?"
You had started to pull away, making to turn toward the kitchen but Damon was infinitely faster than you. His drink was discarded, one hand going to your upper arm and the other to your waist, tugging you back into his vicinity.
"On the contrary, I don't think I've ever been so sure minded, sparrow. I'm sorry for not protecting you tonight." His voice was tight now, the warmth of his hands tingling down your body.
"It's not your fault, or job, Damon." Your voice had quieted to match his, all humor leaving. You didn't know where this guilt had come from, but it was misplaced. Since you'd met Damon he'd made some bad decisions, but you had also seen his sacrifice so much for the sake of the team. Even if others didn't acknowledge it, he didn't need to add anymore to his plate.
"I'd like it to be. My job." His reply was lightning quick, eyes pinning yours in place.
Were you dreaming?
Damon's signature smirk was visible for a split second, telling you that your confusion was written all over your face. "I think that I'm asking you, in the most coming of age movie way, if you'd like to go steady?"
⋆。˚ ☁︎ ˚。⋆。˚☽˚。⋆
send any fic requests here!! all comments/criticisms/requests welcome
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steddieas-shegoes · 7 months
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Steve and Eddie go through the whole adoption process in 1996, despite how difficult it was to find somewhere willing to help them at all and despite their conflicted feelings on adoption.
The way they saw it though, providing a loving home for a child who needed one was better than the alternative. Eddie had enough experience with temporary foster homes to know stability was better than constant moving and questionable foster parents.
They get a foster placement almost immediately, a six year old girl named Amelia. She’s quiet, but not in a way that worries them. She’s very focused, and enjoys going to school more than any regular children’s hobbies. Neither of them know what to do with that other than keep encouraging it.
She stays for months, months turn into a year, and the agency finally gives them the go ahead to complete the adoption process.
But they don’t do anything without talking to Amelia.
She’s happy there, her therapist signs off on it immediately and explains that Amelia has shown more personality development and less signs of trauma with them than she had even living at home. Not to mention they actually brought her to appointments, unlike her previous guardians.
To celebrate, they throw a party with all their friends and family and tell Amelia she can invite anyone from school she wants. She invites everyone.
Turns out their daughter is a social butterfly and is friends with everyone.
At the party, Eddie pulls out his guitar, plays a bunch of popular kid-friendly songs after a very scathing look from Steve as a reminder to behave.
Amelia walks over to him after a few songs, on a sugar high like he’d never seen on her before, and asks to play the guitar.
He’s hesitant, but not because he’s still protective of his guitars, more because he doesn’t want her to embarrass herself in front of her friends. Kids are cruel, even and especially at seven, and the last thing he wants is this to be the thing that kids talk about for the next ten years.
She sits on the couch and holds it, arranging her fingers…correctly. Eddie watches.
Steve is watching from across the room.
She starts strumming, very quietly at first, not as confident as she’d been a moment ago. And then she starts really playing.
It’s one of the songs Eddie wrote. He played it for the last four months nonstop as he perfected it, and she’d apparently been watching.
Eddie’s jaw is on the floor and he quickly looks over to Steve, who has a similar look of surprise on his face.
He doesn’t interrupt her. She makes it through the entire song.
She looks up.
“When did you learn to play guitar?” Eddie asks.
“When I was watching you.”
“But have you played before tonight?”
Amelia shook her head, looking down. “Didn’t wanna touch it without asking.”
Eddie pulls the guitar from her hands and sets it aside, then pulls her into his lap and hugs her. Steve sits down on the couch next to them, hand on her back.
“You can always ask, sweetie. And if you’re this interested and this natural, we can buy you your own guitar if you want. I didn’t think you were interested in playing.”
“I wanna be like you,” Amelia admitted against his shoulder.
Eddie was done for. He looked at Steve, half-panicked, trying not to cry in front of these people, but Steve wasn’t faring any better.
“Then we can go get you a guitar tomorrow. You can get your own picks, too. They might even have purple ones.”
“Can I have red? Like yours?”
“Of course, sweetie.”
It only took them two days after that to realize she could play by ear, just like Eddie.
And then it only took another day after that to realize she had taught herself to read music too.
They spent hours and hours every week playing together while Steve cooked dinner or checked her homework or just watched them.
When Eddie’s band decided to record another album and go on tour when Amelia was 12, Eddie insisted that she get to be on it.
She ended up helping write one of their songs, played on the track on the album, and with a lot of work, convinced Steve to let them homeschool her for the entire 8 months they’d be on tour so she could perform on stage with her dad.
“Can’t believe she’s not even genetically yours. Are you sure you didn’t have an affair?” Steve asked the night before they were leaving for Europe.
“When would I have had an affair? I came back to the tour bus or hotel with you every single night,” Eddie kissed him softly. “She’s amazing, huh?”
“She is. What happens when she wants to be a full blown rockstar like her dad too?”
“Then we make sure she’s protected and has good people around her like I have. She could be a rockstar easily. She’s got the talent and the presence,” Eddie smiled. “And she’s got me to make sure no one takes advantage of her. But she’s only 12. We’ve got time to worry about that later.”
“You’re bringing her onstage every single night all over the world for the next eight months, baby. I think later is now.”
Eddie sighed. “She’s gonna blow them all away. I’m proud of her. Let’s focus on that for now.”
And she did blow everyone away. The fans and the media had nothing but good things to say, and Steve didn’t have to go into overprotective mom mode at all until she was 15 and signing a record deal of her own.
But between Eddie and him, the entire industry knew better than to fuck with her or them.
They made rules, of course. School still came first, she still had required family events to be at, she still had regular friends at home. She wasn’t allowed at any parties, not even the events for award ceremonies.
But she didn’t really need those rules. She had no interest in parties or abandoning her friends or family, and she was a straight A student who still had hopes of getting into Brown for Journalism like her Aunt Nancy. She had a passion for music and wanted to share it, but not at the cost of the rest of her life.
And Eddie and Steve did everything they could to make sure she got to have everything. That’s what they’d promised her from day one.
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starjaeyun · 6 months
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gatekeeper — tsukishima kei !
— tsukishima assures that he is not embarrassed of dating you, you think otherwise
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warning/s : fem! reader, misunderstanding 😁 & a small fight at the beginning, profane language, tinsy bit of angst, fluff & crack from the second half ‘til it ends
note : had this little idea while writing a kageyama drabble so they might be quite similar
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“just give up already”
y/n’s tip-toeing came to a stop. seriously? this was the 4th time this week! with an annoyed groan, she turns around, fists clenched, brows furrowed, and it looks as though a tick mark was formed on her forehead. behind her stood her oh so loving boyfriend, tsukishima kei, who somehow always catches her trying to sneak in the volleyball gym.
“oh c’mon kei! why won’t you let me watch your practice?!” tsukishima sighed, “we’ve talked about this” he grumbled, why does she have to be so stubborn?
“don’t talk like those romanticized, toxic boyfriends on wattpad!” y/n hits his arm, which barely does any damage to him, “and don’t act like them as well!”
tsukishima raises a hand to fix his glasses, “are you saying i’m toxic?”
“i never said that! i just said don’t talk and act like—”
“so you’re implying it?”
“well, you’re going to be if you carry on with that bullshit!” tsukishima grows silent and stares at y/n, who had seemed to be reaching the highest point of her annoyed meter, which would then slowly escalate into anger.
after a few seconds of silence, he spoke, “take these, don’t wait for me and go home. cool your head” in each of his hands were his hoodie and an umbrella, which he brought with him on the way to the gym incase it might rain before they’re able to go back to the locker rooms. with y/n giving no sign of taking it, he placed it on her foot and carried on walking past her.
“i don’t understand you” tsukishima comes to a halt, looking back almost immediately upon noticing y/n’s change of tone. crap, was i too harsh?
“why are you acting like that if you’re embarrassed of me?” he couldn’t tell whether she’s sad or angry.
“acting? acting like what? and what do you mean embarrassed?!” his tone immediately gave away his nervousness.
“in school or when you’re with someone else, you avoid and act like you don’t know me but when we’re alone, suddenly you’re taking care of me! make it clear whether you love me or not to save both our time because i am not about to start losing myself for a boy who can’t love me the way i deserve!” it’s clear that she wanted to say more so tsukishima stayed silent. “if you’re going to love me, at least be honest with me! am i embarrassing or not?!”
“of course not!”
“then why?!” it was a miracle that y/n was not crying nor shouting at the moment.
tsukishima fully turns his body this time, “what’s embarrassing is my explanation…” and the mood suddenly lightens.
“TSUKISHIMA, YOU BASTARD!” tanaka and nishinoya’s yelling made tsukishima sigh.
“you call me selfish but keep shimizu-senpai’s sister all to yourself” kageyama grumbles
tsukishima stands still. hands clasped together behind his back and head bowed down. he looks like a child getting a scolding, or how the the freak duo looks whenever daichi catches their slip ups.
nishinoya and tanaka kneels in front of the first year. head bowed down as if they were praising him, and that they are.
“on this day, we honor you. congratulations on getting a shimizu!” they say in unison.
“you’re overreacting” tsukishima simply says.
“nope, i, too, would congratulate you tsukki. no offense, but you’re not exactly the ideal boyfriend” yamaguchi says with a finger under his chin.
“mhm! so you better treat her right tsukishima! she’s like our little sister” sugawara��s smile does not look comforting at all.
“call me if you need help in buying gifts!” daichi volunteers happily.
“and me if you need advice!” asahi adds.
“why are you guys taking my job?” shimizu comments while giggling. “but, i do think that tsukishima is just right for my little sister” she turns to look at her sister who was now playing around with kageyama and hinata, “she’s as chaotic as those two, he’ll be able to handle her. so i trust that i won’t have to worry much?”
“of course” tsukishima didn’t seem like himself at the moment. his eyes seemed to have soften at the sight of his girlfriend. he smiled, though not too obvious.
“why are you smiling like a male lead in a drama?” tanaka teased. and though tsukishima hates expressing his emotions to his teammates, he certainly loves poking their annoyance scale, “because this is what it’s like to love and be loved”
“Why are you making it seem like kiyoko does not love me back! she does love me! right? right?” tanaka gave kiyoko hopeful eyes and received no response aside from her turning around.
“I’m not talking about platonic love”
“WHY YOU—“
“KEI!” apparently, while he successfully annoyed the second year, his girlfriend heard what he said and would definitely never let it go.
“when have you been so sweet?! love and be loved? seriously?!” she bounced up and down, hands on tsukishima’s shoulder for support.
“she’s no different from the freak duo, i’m afraid” sugawara comments and laughs along with the third years.
“but am i really that beautiful that you had to gatekeep me from your entire team?” she laughed, still bouncing, and tsukishima only stood there with his smile never seeming to fade.
“if that were me i’d be receiving his train of insults by now” hinata says, joining the rest of the team as they watched how tsukishima seemed to be a lot softer around y/n.
“you’re such a gatekeeper kei!” she teased, this time, she stopped bouncing and have started poking her boyfriend’s sides.
“that he is! how dare he gatekeep kiyoko-san’s sister?!” tanaka kneeled back down on one knee with a hand on his chest.
nishinoya followed suit, “and what’s annoying is that she reciprocated his love!”
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spncvr · 7 months
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waiting room | s. reid
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summary: spencer can't seem to escape the girl in the waiting room
pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader
warnings: mentions of reid's addiction & tobias hankel, mentions of kidnapping and mass shootings (in, like, a joking way??) my terrible, terrible humour, ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE LMAO, this is deffo terrible, pls tell me if i missed anything!!
a/n: ok idk if i wanna continue this and make it a series so lmk lol (also im on writers block so i literally can't come up with SHIT)
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SPENCER REID WAS a pessimist.
At least, that’s what he’d call himself. His colleague, Derek Morgan would most likely (and by most likely, he means, definitely already has) call him an overanalysing introvert. But in Spencer’s defense, there has never really been a good reason to go out and “live your life”. Consider this:
Go to the new coffee shop? Mass shooting.
Go to the mall? A child gets abducted.
Leave the apartment for a short while? A stalker finds out where he lives, kidnaps him in his sleep, and, in a nightmarish turn, auctions off his organs to the bidder in the black market.
Besides, his life isn’t some John Green book. There were no life-affirming adventures or poetic moments of self-discovery awaiting him. Carpe diem? A fanciful notion for others, but for him, not so much. Sorry, Mr. Keating.
Yet life—or more accurately, bureau protocol— had its own plans. Ever since the Tobias Hankel incident, a visit to the psychologist wasn’t just a request but rather (unfortunately for him) an order. Which meant, he’d have to risk his entire life to get up and walk for ten whole minutes just to sit and wait, in this glaringly bright waiting room, when he could have stayed at home and read the new books he’d gotten from his team as a get-well gift.
Speaking of which, why the gifts? He was fine. Physically, at least. But really, when have you ever seen get-well-soon cards in an asylum? Well, alright, maybe he was being a little bit dramatic. A visit to the psychologist doesn’t mean he’ll be institutionalised—but then again, Spencer Reid was never one to wear rose-tinted glasses. 
This is his third time in the waiting room, and she’s always there. He isn’t sure as to why she is, because, well, unlike himself, she was very clearly an optimist—and at least, from the looks of it, she hasn’t been kidnapped and drugged in the past month. But she's sitting there again, in the exact same chair for the past three weeks, along with a beacon of smiles where joy usually fears to trend. Maybe, he isn't as good of a profiler as he’d like to think he is.
“Dr. Reid?” the call of his name rips him out of his thoughts. He looks up to see the same kind woman he’s seen the past three weeks—not the one in the waiting room, no, he means his therapist.
Dr. Brown was easy to profile: She wore heels to make herself look taller, and she hated wearing glasses, apparent by how she would continuously place them atop her head instead of her nose. Her teeth were abnormally perfect, which meant, she’d had to wear braces when she was younger—which (from his humbling experience) means she wasn’t exactly the most popular at school. Perhaps, psychology felt appealing to her because she could help people like her. 
“How are you?” she asks, her pen clicking.
Usually, he’d offer her a meek shrug. The kind that could win awards for its commitment to non-commitment. Besides, he’s not one to talk about how he feels—there isn’t much to say, anyway. And let’s face it,  “How are you?” in the grand tapestry of human interaction is almost as genuine as a three-dollar bill. And, get this, the average person asks “How are you?” 6,739 times a year but only listens to the answer about half the time—well, okay, maybe those numbers might have been fabricated, but isn’t the sincerity behind the question also made up? But instead of telling her all this, he remembers what Hotch had told him, one, two, three weeks ago: that he ought to cooperate with Dr. Brown or the board won’t be happy. So, he kisses his teeth before he says:
“Fine. I’m fine.”
And the session went on.
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PLS TELL ME IF I SHLD CONTIUE OR NOT LOLOLOL spam my inbox with ideas I BEG.
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orshii · 2 months
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Crashing Waves and Second Chances
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☆ Summary: You’re enjoying a well-deserved vacation with your best friend after finishing college in Greece when you run into Wooyoung, your first love from high school. The unexpected encounter stirs up old feelings and unresolved issues from your past. As Wooyoung tries to explain and make sense of what happened between you, you’re faced with a choice: revisit the past and seek closure, or move forward and see if there’s a new possibility for your relationship. Will you let him explain and explore the chance for a fresh start?
☆ Pairing: Jung Wooyoung x female reader ☆ Genre: fluff, angst, idiots in love ☆ Word count: 6,8 k
☆A/N: Waa this is my first Wooyoung ff and I'm crying. Wooyoung recently is so insane like?? I just love him and he reminded me he also exists next to my two biases :'(( But I'm back in my Wooyoung era again, yess!! And as I want to be in Greece I wrote this story, because I'm going feral staying home. And of course, because it's Greece I needed to include some Greek God references too haha. It is worth reading it till the end cause I kinda died. :D Also sorry for the mistakes I am still learning. Soo enjoy this little drabble hihi!! Byee! (divider)
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The slight waves of the turquoise sea crashed along the sandy beach, sparkling from the sun beaming at its highest point. The sound of the waves lured me into a daze as the world's nestled sounds slowly disappeared. The sun burnt my skin like I was in the underworld, the sun being Hades himself, looking at me with hungry, burning eyes. But then a slight chill ran through my body as the summer breeze crawled through my skin, trying to cool down the heat I was feeling. Suddenly I felt like I was in heaven as I walked on the beach, the waves of the cool sea crashing against my foot, the wind blowing through my hair, through my white dress, as the sun slowly went down, creating a breathtakingly beautiful landscape as the sky was full of orange and red colours, the sea copying its beauty, making it look like the sky was never-ending, just as the sea.
Then I heard screaming.
And that was the moment when I opened my eyes quickly as something cold wetted me and I immediately sat up from the sunbed just to realize I was, in fact, next to the sea, but the screaming came from a little kid that just ran next to me and he just needed to get rid of the water dripping from his hair next to me. The next thing I noticed was me being as red as a crab because I fell asleep under the sun. Great, now I'm going to sleep on my back for a weak and look like half-cooked meat. I squinted from the pain as I wanted to stand up to get into the water to cool down at least.
My best friend next to me looked at me through her sunglasses a book in her hands and completely under the umbrella's shadow. She smirked at me enjoying my suffering.
"Thank you for waking me up to not burn into ashes," I said to her ironically as I squinted my eyes at her.
"You looked like you had a good dream, I just couldn't wake you up." He said acting innocent.
"Whatever, I'm going to drown in the sea," I said joking to her as she giggled at that.
"Be careful, you might get dragged down by Poseidon himself." My best friend shouted after me as I was walking towards the shore.
"I wish, dude, I wish." I turned back for a quick moment to say it to her with a smirk.
Then as I hit the water, I felt relieved because the cool water chilled my hot body and mind a little. I quickly went deeper into the sea, diving underwater just to open my eyes and look around the crystal-clear water, where I saw a few little fishes swimming around –actually swimming away from me because they were scared little shits—well I would be too if a shark would swim towards me that is no question.
The water was sparkling around me from the sand that flew upwards from the bottom of the sea, and as the sun beamed through the water it sparkled and I just lived for it, because it was so mesmerizing, I honestly could live as a mermaid, I would volunteer—
I swam around a little, cooling down so I could feel like a human again, I turned on my back and just floated on the water like garbage, pretending I was dead. Meanwhile, I thought about how I was waiting for this moment, to get away from the full-year pressure I was under, with my best friend, as we planned to get away from home for a vacation after we just graduated, leaving the stress and the pressure behind trying to figure out what is going to happen next. We just wanted to enjoy our little time together here and close out the responsibilities that came with us being unemployed as we finished college.
We decided we were going to travel to Greece, which was both of our favorite places on earth, because we felt like this place connected us, and a little piece of our hearts just felt like it was made from the soil of this landscape. We just felt a connection towards it, that pulled us towards this place. And let's not talk about the tell stories of the Gods, each of them beaming a uniqueness that didn't exist on this Earth. And when we finally arrived, we couldn't stop smiling, every stress and uneasiness leaving our souls just to feel a little relieved.
As I walked back to our sunbeds, where my best friend, Bora was sitting, still holding a book in front of her, being lost in the imaginary world, I glanced through the beach and my eyes immediately got caught on people surfing on the big waves of the crystal water, the waves making a tunnel where the professional surfers went through. I immediately got excited, wanting to try it, as I arrived at my best friend with an excited smile.
"People are surfing, look!" I pointed towards the shore, where two surfing tutors were standing, helping people out to try this sport. "And those tutors might be our next catch, just saying." I winked at her, to catch his attention, as she looked towards them with now an interested look. Her face looked like she was thinking, calculating if it was a good decision or not.
"Please?" I interlaced my hands and looked at her with puppy eyes. I always wanted to try out surfing, and this was the perfect occasion. And not for the tutors that I wanted to check closer, not at all—
Bora sighed. "Okay, let's go, surfing seems fun. And the two men there look interesting from the back." She smirked at me as I nodded in agreement as we collected our stuff and wore our flowery beach dresses.
We approached the spot, where the surfing boards with different kinds of designs were stuck into the sand and when I spotted a well-defined back with a tattoo on the nape, that was too familiar to me, I immediately regretted my decision of wanting to learn surfing.
But it was too late because before I could signal somehow to my best friend to turn around, the black-haired one with the tattoo, who wore only black swimming shorts, turned around and his eyes immediately landed on me.
And I just wanted to shout for Poseidon to drag me deep into the sea and make me his slave, because that was better than being here standing in front of my first love that broke my heart, and he didn't even know about it.
Well, he was my high school crush and I was head over heels for him, and he gave me signs that were so questionable, he made my little heart believe he wanted something from me as well. But in the end, he got together with a blonde girl with perfect red lips and a perfect body. So, eventually, I needed to let it go and get over him somehow that felt impossible. I managed to forget him with time as I didn't see him for years. But seeing him now still made my heart beat crazy like we were back in high school. And I hated it.
As he saw us approach, he nudged the person next to him, who had black hair with some blonde stripes in it, and he turned as well just to his eyes start to sparkle with excitement his lips in awe, seeing us. His dimples slightly showed from the smile he beamed at us, wearing light blue swimming shorts, his well-defined body on the sight.
They were standing there, waiting for us to approach, looking at us with different expressions. Song Mingi with pure happiness and Jung Wooyoung with wide eyes.
Jung Wooyoung the black haired and Song Mingi with the oreo hair, we were all classmates along with my bestie, Bora. The four of us were kind of inseparable. But when I started to feel more than friends towards Wooyoung, things got complicated and when we finished high school, we never saw each other. That was why some uneasy feelings swam back to me, when Bora hugged Mingi in excitement, their friendship ending just because both their best friends were fools, it wasn't fair, but this was a best friend's job after all, to be there for your best friend.
Then I just put aside all my thoughts about the past and hugged Mingi with a generous smile, I really missed Mingi, because he was like my brother back in high school. We had been friends since the beginning of school and with time Wooyoung and Bora joined us, but before them, it was just me and Mingi, we could speak about everything and anything, making us inseparable. But after what happened between the four of us it suddenly disappeared, the friendship we built through the years lost like it never existed.
When I hugged Wooyoung it wasn't sincere, I still hated him, for treating me like he did in the past, and it made me want to run away as quickly as possible.
"What are you guys doing here?" Bora asked as she hugged Wooyoung as well.
"We got a summer job here," Mingi spoke up as I avoided Wooyoung's gaze on me, focusing on Mingi only. "We are teaching people surfing and we are on a vacation at the same time, isn't it perfect?" Mingi said with excitement, his eyes shining from how sincere he was with his emotions that were always so obvious if you knew him sincerely.
"I didn't know you were into surfing," I said a little frowning, as I looked at Mingi as Wooyoung's presence still annoyed me.
"Well, we tried it out with Wooyoung for fun, and here we are, aren't we Woo?" He nudged Wooyoung with a smile, who was quiet the whole time, which was very unlike him, he just never shut up back then, and it was weird seeing him staying in silence. When Mingi nudged him a little that was when he caught up on himself and smiled back at Mingi.
"It's a vacation and we even get paid, is it heaven?" Wooyoung said as he chuckled, then looking towards us, well at me, with sharp foxlike eyes that I hated at that moment, but loved back then. "And you girls? On vacation?" He asked staring into my soul as I unwantedly looked through his still-handsome features, the unforgettable mole under his left eye, his wet hair a few strings falling into his eyes, making his gaze more intense, his bare torso on the sight, a new tattoo on his ribs that was a writing in another language.
"Yeah, we graduated and we are celebrating," I said shortly, with a fake smile as I averted my gaze from his handsome face. I hated how he made me lose my mind by only looking at him, after years of not seeing him.
"That's so nice, sometimes I regret that we missed out on college, it could have been wild," Mingi said as he chuckled looking at Wooyoung for a slight moment, who chuckled in agreement, then Mingi looked towards us again. "So did you want to learn how to surf or you just wanted to say hello?" Mingi asked curiously.
"Y/N wanted to try it out," Bora said quickly side-glancing at me with a knowing smile. I am going to kill her, so she can stay in Greece for the rest of her 'not' life.
I looked at her, somehow not too obviously telling her with my eyes that—I did not want to anymore.
Mingi clasped his hands together, "Cool, then you found the perfect men to teach you and it's even free for you girls." Mingi winked at us with a proud smile.
I wanted to back up, but I just couldn't be childish like that, to run away because my high school crush was in front of me years after, I wasn't like that…but I sincerely hated him at that moment.
With that Mingi started to explain the tactics of surfing, and firstly they showed us how to stand on the board on the dry so we would have at least a little knowledge of how to do it on water.
Meanwhile, Mingi taught Bora, next to them Wooyoung and I were standing as he explained to me how to hold the paddle, that beginners needed to use at first. I avoided his eyes in every moment I could. It was awkward and I counted the time so we could say goodbye to them and avoid them for the rest of the trip. But the education lasted a while, because we tried it out on the shallow water as well, sitting on the boards at first with the paddle and the first mission was to stand up, which I was struggling with at first but after countless fallings into the water I finally managed to stand up on the board.
Eventually, I had fun, I really did, because I put aside all my concerning thoughts and how I hated the man in front of me, who just sincerely tried to help me and catch me whenever I fell off the board. My emotions were a mixture of letting go of the past to start over and a mixture of not letting myself fall into his trap again.
But when I fell off the board again—because I celebrated my standing successfully on the board too hard—arms circled my waist to pull me up underwater, just to meet with two sharp eyes gazing at me with a smile, I lost against my own rules. It was just impossible not to fall into his trap when his wet hair fell damp on his forehead, his dimples showing from the curve of his lips, his chocolate brown eyes staring down at me, which looked almost orange from the sun shining at us. I just wanted to get away from him, because my heart started to beat fast, and I didn't want these feelings to eat me alive, it destroyed me and I didn't want that again. And as he smiled at me his face close to mine, where waterdrops fell to his chest, the thoughts of his girlfriend came back to me and that made my heart ache as I just felt overwhelmed by the fact, I nearly fell into his trap again.
So, after separating from him, I swam back to the seashore saying 'That was enough for today.' And I knew I seemed weird in their eyes, I knew my best friend also looked at me with questions in her eyes, but I just wanted to get away from there so I could breathe again normally.
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My plan of avoiding them for the rest of the trip, seemed to completely fail because we just bumped into Wooyoung and Mingi every day. And we started to hang out together like in the old times. It was weird at first but after a little, I relaxed a bit and I didn't let my feelings fuck up my well-deserved vacation. So, I started to be there with them, to laugh with them and just enjoy our time together.
One evening, Mingi told us we should celebrate our graduation with some drinks, which seemed the best idea because we hadn't really drunk for our success with Bora, so we agreed immediately.
"So, how's it with Wooyoung?" Bora side-glanced at me while putting lipstick on her thin lips that was a strong red color standing in front of the mirror in our hotel room.
I scoffed at her. "Nothing? You know I sincerely hate him." I started looking at him quite sharply.
She looked at me from the reflection of the mirror as I stood next to my bed, thinking what should I wear. "C'mon, Y/N, it was a long time ago, just enjoy yourself," Bora said, closing the lipstick she used.
"I know, it's just…" I sat down on my bed staring down at my hands. "He still owes me some explanation of what happened in London and with everything, like I'm so confused from day one, Bora, it's insane how I can't forget what happened." I rambled to Bora as she turned around to look at me with concerned eyes.
She came next to me and sat beside me to caress my back. "Yea, it was so fucked-up, that whole trip was a disaster, and you really deserve an explanation of why he did that." She smiled at me genuinely, "And I'm sure Wooyoung wants to talk to you, he wanted to since we met with them, you just avoided him the whole time."
"Yes, because I can't fucking look into his eyes, without my old emotions coming to the surface and I hate it…" I looked into Bora's concerned eyes.
"Well, I think you two should talk, because it looks more complicated than it is." She said as she smiled, her eyes forming crescents.
I scoffed at that. "Just help me pick out an outfit." I leaned down towards my luggage which was a mess just like myself.
"So you could look pretty for Wooyoung?" He nudged me with his elbow, smirking as I hit his upper arm in response.
"I want to look pretty, for myself and not for others."
"Great, you should absolutely wear this," She pulled out a little black dress with a v-line and some ruffles on the end. "It's cute and sexy at the same time." She winked at me.
I rolled my eyes at her and ripped my dress out of her grip annoyed just so I could wear it. When I looked into the mirror as I was wearing the black dress, a confident, cute, and sexy girl stared back at me as Bora said. The dress reached a little above my knees, the v-line leaving my neck empty, so I put on a silver necklace with matching earrings. I left my hair to fall onto my shoulders naturally, the shorter strings of my hair falling into my eyes. As Bora stood next to me to check herself out as well, she looked gorgeous, she was wearing a tight purple dress, highlighting her perfect body line, and her black hair was in a tight bun with some silver earrings and rings. We looked hot and we were ready to gradually celebrate our graduation.
We arrived at the bar next to the pool that was lightened up with a few colorful led, that matched with the lights of the bar that was surrounded with tables and bar stools. It was already close to midnight as we were searching for the boys. Then Bora spotted them and we walked towards them between strange people, who enjoyed the free drinks as well in the perfect night weather.
When I spotted Wooyoung, who was standing next to a table with Mingi, drink already in hand, I just couldn't take my eyes off him, as my heart started to beat fast. He looked so handsome in his black shirt, the last two buttons undone, his sharp collarbones on the sight, paired with black denim shorts, that reached above his knees, his tattoo peaking a little that I just noticed he had, then my eyes landed back to his face, where his hair was wiped back a few strings falling onto his eyes, making his sharp gaze, more intense. His silver earrings hung low from his ears with a few piercings that matched with his silver necklace. He eyed me up and down very obviously with his intense gaze. And I just prayed for Poseidon to kidnap me, because it was hard to keep up, above water.
Mingi was standing next to him, wearing a bright purple shirt with blue denim shorts and a lot of accessories like necklaces, earrings, and a lot of silver rings. And we just needed to laugh because we unintentionally matched with each other, this was our dynamic, and it wasn't the first time.
As we started to drink a few cocktails and some shots the party started, the colorful lights making us disappear into the crowd that surrounded us. I danced with my hands held high jumping to the beat of the music as I felt free after an overwhelming year. The four of us were standing in a circle as we made a few silly dance moves laughing at each other. My eyes met with Wooyoung's a few times, which was a very big mistake because I felt his gaze on me the whole night the tension between us heavier and it made me uncomfortable because all of this was unfair.
So, I decided I needed more drinks and went to the bar counter to ask for a lighter cocktail and sat on the barstool until it got ready, watching the bartender in awe as he made the cocktail with some tricks.
Then suddenly I felt a hand on my waist and a strange black-haired man's face came in front of me. He was wearing a white shirt, unbuttoned his well-defined chest and abs in sight, his shoulders broad and a silver necklace ending with a cross on his popped-up chest, as he was wearing sunglasses, and I frowned.
"Am I blind or the sun is somewhere up above?" I asked the strange man in confusion as the alcohol made me feel woozy as I looked around.
The stranger chuckled at that and lifted the sunglasses to his forehead lifting his hair, making his undercut more visible. His sharp eyes were now on the sight, which reminded me of a cat. "Yes, it's up don't you see it? It's everywhere." He showed around with his hand to the lights that surrounded us and he plopped down to the barstool next to me. He smiled at me as his deep dimples showed and made his face more handsome.
I giggled at his statement and reached for my drink, sipping from it as I looked at the strange man.
"So, what does a pretty girl like you, do here alone drinking?" He leaned closer to my ear so I could understand what he said as the music was too loud.
"I'm with my friends, I just came for a drink." I pointed towards my friends, where my eyes immediately met with Wooyoung's, who was just standing there with folded arms, looking at us with killer eyes. It was my time to shine.
"Are they only your friends?" He asked with a knowing smile.
I just nodded.
The stranger hummed. "I'm Choi San." He leaned closer again and I barely heard what he said. "What's your name, pretty?" He looked deep into my eyes and suddenly I forgot my name.
"It's uh—Park Y/N." Finally, I could somehow stumble my name out as I reached my hand towards his to shake the handsome man's hands. And when he accepted it, he smiled at me and pulled me closer to him so he could whisper into my ear. "Will you dance with me, pretty?"
The alcohol swam around my body making my mind not to think at all, so I accepted his invite and I found myself dancing with a total stranger on my strange vacation where my high school crush shot daggers into the stranger's back.
As we danced along to the music, our bodies flushed together swaying our hips to the rhythm of the music, enjoying ourselves, suddenly we were separated by a hand that belonged to Jung Wooyoung himself, as he glared down at the stranger standing in front of him, they were the same height, but the expression on Wooyoung's face just made the stranger slightly smaller, as Wooyoung mumbled a few words to him that I couldn't expel. I only saw that San lifted his hands in surrender and grabbed Wooyoung's shoulder with one hand mumbling something back that seemed an apology. And with that, the stranger who looked like Ares himself just disappeared. And I looked after him wide-eyed, then at Wooyoung as I scoffed at him and turned around, trying to escape from the torturing crowd.
I felt angry at Wooyoung because what did he even think? Was it normal to send off a stranger that tried to just fucking dance with me? We were back when we were teenagers, back when I didn't understand anything he did, and it made me feel sick of him.
As I got out of the crowd, I just felt Wooyoung was following me with angry steps. And when he reached me, he grabbed my wrist and turned me around to angrily face him.
"Do not fucking run away from me!" He said as he yanked me closer to him, he looked pissed.
"What the hell did you think there?" I said with a sharp expression, trying to free my wrist from his grip, when I succeeded, I folded my arms in front of my chest. "Oh, I'm Jung Wooyoung, I should totally send this dude off, because he is flirting with her, and no one should touch her, only me. Even though I have a girlfriend." I started to ramble my thoughts out, as I gesticulated with my arms stressed.
"What are you talking about? I don't have a girlfriend." His expression changed from angry, to confused.
Words got stuck in my throat for a moment. "What about that blonde girl?" I asked confused.
He sighed, puffing air out of his lungs. "Nothing, she wasn't my girlfriend..."
 "Well…it doesn't matter. Let's just leave it." I said as I wanted to turn around.
"No, Y/N!" He grabbed my wrist again turning me around, not letting me go this time. "Stop this stubborn attitude and let's talk!" His voice raised as his face became a little impatient.
"I don't want to talk Wooyoung! We should have, a long time ago, but it's too late now because I'm so sick of your games, I can't do this Woo." I said as my voice became lower, whispering his nickname that I loved so much.
"What games are you talking about?" His grip on my wrist became a little stronger as he held my other hand in his hands pulling me closer to him. "You confuse me just as much as I do you," He whispered it close to my face.
I looked down at our hands, and I was thinking about the fact, of how much my younger self would have liked this situation. At that, my emotions suddenly hit me and I was just too tired for this conversation.
"I'm talking about London…" My voice was barely a whisper, as I still avoided his staring eyes.
He scoffed at that, letting my hands go as he ran his fingers through his raven-black hair in frustration. "London was messed up, we both made mistakes there."
I scoffed. "Yeah, whatever you say," I said giving up.
"No for fuck's sake, don't fucking do this, Y/N! You have no idea how much I had suffered because of you." He grabbed his hair stressed as he looked at me with an emotional expression.
I was too stunned to speak, my heart pumped blood into my ears as I barely heard what he said.
"If you—If you would have told me to stay…back in London, I would've Y/N! But you said nothing and let me go, it was all on you." He said stepping closer to me, his eyes watering.
I shook my head as I stepped back. "You can't fucking say that! You knew I liked you, Wooyoung, haven't I given you enough signs?" I raised my voice at him, losing my patience.
"No, you haven't! Because you were always with that fucker, Yunho and it seemed he was more important than me the whole trip." He lifted his hands shrugging his shoulders with a disappointed look.
I laughed at that, we both acted so childish and it made me feel sick. "You know what?" I stepped closer to him as I lifted my head his face close to mine. "It was a long time ago, let's just forget it. But one last thing." My eyes stared into his sharp eyes. "You can simply fuck off," I said as he looked stunned, and I turned around walking as fast as I could to disappear from there because I had enough of him.
My life was so easy after we finished high school, it was so easy without Wooyoung…too easy. But four years later he had to come into my life when all I wanted to do was to relax a little, but he had to knock on my door and step into my life again. What was the point of it? We did not belong to each other and I learned that a long time ago.
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 It was 4 a.m. already as I was lying in my bed after I slammed our hotel room's door. My thoughts drowned me as I was just staring up at the white ceiling, Bora nowhere to be seen. I was thinking of the things Wooyoung said and remembered all the things that happened in London.
Well long story short—We travelled to London as a celebration of finishing high school. The things that happened there weren't a big deal thinking about it now, but back then as I was still young, life throwing out into the wild to experience the things that would make me stronger, to experience love and heartbreak at the same time, was unforgettable for a young girl.
It was our second day in London, and we went out to see the nightlife of the city. It was the four of us and a few classmates, who joined us for the night. And yes, Yunho was a good friend of mine and yes, I might happen to be with him a lot. But I was just trying to forget Wooyoung because I knew he did not return my feelings. As we got deeper into the night Wooyoung was by my side all night, holding my hand, and hugging me the whole time, and then the boys made a bet, where Wooyoung needed to kiss me out of the blue. And he did kiss me and he did tell me that he liked me, but I did not know what to do with that information as he was drunk and it might have been part of the bet.
That kiss was the best kiss of my life, it made my feelings grow deeper for him, he made me believe he felt the same, but on that night as we walked back to our hotel I unintentionally eavesdropped and heard that he did not like me it was just a bet. Then the next thing I saw was that he was kissing a girl from our classmates in front of his hotel room. And that broke me into pieces. From then I ignored Wooyoung the whole trip, not wanting to see him. Then thanks to my luck, he needed to go home sooner for some unknown reasons and I did not beg for him to stay, because I simply did not want to see him anymore.
As I was deep in my thoughts I heard the loud ping of my phone, which broke the silent bubble that embraced me. I checked my phone and it was an old group chat that I thought I was never going to see again. It was a group chat that the four of us used back then.
-Mango to 4 makes 1 team- Guys where are u??! We've been searching for u everywhere... Woo-woohoo sent a picture.
As I opened the group chat the picture that Wooyoung sent was of his hands that held a can of beer and the sea, as he was sitting on the beach, I assumed.
Mango Bro, what are you doing? Do you want to die? Woo-woohoo I'm with me, myself and I, we get along a lot. bahahahshbdwef Mango replying to Woo-woohoo Dude are u okay?? Woo-woohoo I wish the water would wash me away to Londonn. Y/n-ooo If you depart now, you might get there by the morning. Borie Guys, are we really stuck in the London situation? Woo-woohoo I don't even know what I did there... Y/n-ooo Breaking my heart? Woo-woohoo ??? Can we talk Y/n? Please... Mango These two should be locked into a dirty cell in the middle of the Pacific Ocean...istg, get your shit together you creatures!!
I sighed as I just realized I couldn't just ignore the things just because he broke my heart years ago, I was too stuck in the past that didn't even make sense.
Then another chat popped up on my screen.
Woonderland sent you a voice message.
"Y/n c'mooon, let's talk, I have no idea what I did in London but I'm sure I can explain…like the night I kissed you was the best kiss of my life and I was so glad the boys made that bet…how could someone so beautiful like you, like me, a boy who was so over himself, I couldn't believe that, I was confused, I was young and I didn't know anything about love…oh my God what am I even saying…I'mma just drown in the sea, see ya, u know like the sea. Hah, that was a nice joke."  His voice stumbled the whole time I assumed he was drunk as a skunk. His words did not make much sense. I needed to find him and clear things up.
Y/nnie Where are you?
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As I was walking on the beach the waves of the turquoise sea crushed against my foot, the water felt warm against my skin as my foot sank into the soft sand leaving footprints behind me, that the water washed away immediately. The wind blew on my white dress that I changed into, the sun was slowly rising from the other side of the sea, still painting it red and orange, creating a breathtaking view of the sea.
Suddenly I felt peace as my dream popped up in my mind, where I was walking on the beach. It was the same feeling, but it wasn't a dream, there weren't any kids that could wake me up screaming next to me. I was heading towards a drunken Wooyoung that I would've never imagined because if somebody had said to me, I am going to meet with my first love who broke my heart, and I was on my way to forgiving him, I would've laughed at their face in a blink of an eye.
Then I spotted Wooyoung, who was sitting on the seashore his legs pulled up to his chest a can of beer in his hands as he was staring into the infinity of the bluish sea in the twinkle of the sunrise.
As I approached him, I sat down on the soft sand next to him folding my legs under me, and stared in front of me, mimicking Wooyoung. We sat in a comfortable silence then he reached the can towards me that I took and gulped from it, the beer left a bitter taste in my mouth that went down to my stomach, leaving an emptiness on the way.
Then I just couldn't hold back anymore and I tilted my head towards him to look at his sharp side profile, he looked like Aphrodite's son, who got banned from Olympus because he was too reckless. His jawline was as sharp as Mount Olympus, his sharp eyes gazing at the sea where Poseidon was waiting for us, the sun slowly getting up as Hades cursed our blooming connection.
"So, what happened in London, from your point of view?" I broke the comfortable silence that embraced us, breaking the peace to make peace again.
He slowly turned towards me, as his eye with the mole under was now visible, which made him look more like a God. Then he broke the eye contact and stared down at his hands, fiddling with them.
"Well, when we kissed, I told you I liked you. But you did not say anything to that. It made me believe you didn't feel the same as me, so I just gave up…I just simply gave up, because I was an asshole." His voice stumbled as he explained the situation.
"I saw you kissing that girl," I said as I averted my gaze from his face towards the sea.
He looked at me wide-eyed, as he face-palmed himself. "Fuck, I was so stupid…I did kiss her, but only because I wanted to make sure it wasn't just a fling, I wanted to know if I only imagined the sparkle with you…" I felt as if he looked at me, trying to find out what I was thinking. "But then, you ignored me the whole time…which I understand now."
I just hummed. "Can we just forget the past and start over? I'm sick of this push-and-pull game we are playing…we were just two idiots…" I looked up at him with sincere emotions as he was closer than before.
"Two idiots in love?" He beamed a sincere smile at me, as his dimples were showing, making his features more handsome. And we were just staring at each other like we saw each other for the first time. We really did start it with a clean slate.
"You are so beautiful." He whispered with so much emotion in his eyes as he leaned closer to my face his breath warming more my already blushed cheeks.
I giggled at his compliment trying to hide behind my hands.
"Hey, hey, don't you dare to hide from me." He caught my wrist taking them away from my face with a smile.
Suddenly I stood up. "No, no. I'mma just go drown in the sea, I might get a lover there." I started to walk towards the sea with a smile. Then as I looked behind my back all I saw was Wooyoung getting up from the ground and running towards me.
"Not without me." He shouted as he tried to catch me. I screamed from excitement as I was running from him, nearly waking up the whole hotel. When Wooyoung caught me, he lifted me and held me on his shoulders as my head swung towards the ground. I screamed as I saw the world upwards and he started to run towards the sea crashing into the chill waves, wetting us immediately, as he finally took me down deep in the water that reached both our chins. Both of us were laughing as I started to splash him with the surprisingly warm water, our clothes long soaked as we did not care about that. The beach was echoing with splashing water and our sincere laughter, the shore was nearly empty because of the early hour as the sun just had risen, with only a few people lurking around to watch the sunrise.
As I got a little away from Wooyoung in the little splashing war we had created, he suddenly started to swim towards me and when he reached me, he caught my waist underwater, his hands encircling me, holding me strong, then he suddenly brought the both of us underwater, as we were sinking down towards the bottom, slowly opening our eyes to look at each other's mesmerizing features, both of us looking like Poseidon's stunning creatures, with our hairs flowing around us like a crown. The water sparkled around us with the sun shining above us. When we ran out of oxygen, we swam above water, just to Wooyoung pull me up close to his wet body, I naturally wrapped my legs around his waist, as his hands travelled under my thighs holding me close to him. My arms did the same as I was staring into his foxlike eyes, the waterdrops on his features perfectly slipping from his face to be one with the water that embraced us. The shirt that was glued to his skin, made his collarbone and chest peak out, where a black necklace was hanging with a moon. As my eyes found their way to his lips, I couldn't avert my gaze from his perfect red lips, salty waterdrops highlighting the mole on the bottom of his lips. My eyes met his, where desire burned with a passion that came from hell, making him look like Hades and Eros the God of carnal love.
And when his lips met mine as he held me close to him in the blue sea where we were floating like two paper-made ships, I felt like I could drown in the sea, because as his lips moved against mine, I felt like all the Gods kissed me at once, it was passionate and full of lust that made us whole again. My fingers crawled into his wet hair while we kissed pulling at it slightly as he moaned into my lips, at that my tongue found its way into his mouth discovering all the hidden places. When he got his senses back a little his tongue tangled with mine, fighting for dominance, as his hands lifted me a little to find their way on my ass as he pulled me impossibly closer to him, the water splashing between us.
When we separated after an eternity our foreheads met and we stared into each other's eyes with joy, the waking sun beaming at us from above, painting us with colors of yellow and orange that made the both of us look like a God and Goddess that could rule the world together rewarding the good and punishing the bad.
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A/N: I might write Bora's and Mingi's stories as well because they aren't just old friends, they also have a complicated story. :PP
(Ateez masterlist)
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thepixelelf · 10 days
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warnings: coarse language. mingyu is jealous but doesn't know it. fake dating; roommates; childhood f2l. wc: 902
love triangle au requests
read part 1 first
[who's this guy who's everything I'm not? 2] There's a universe out there where Kim Mingyu is able to understand himself perfectly, knows exactly what he wants, and figures it all out right on time instead of when it's already too late.
But that universe isn't this one.
No, in this world, Mingyu blinks like an idiot when you go, "This is Jihoon. I've probably mentioned him before." He blinks and he straightens up and in his mind, he's kicking himself because of course he knows who this guy is.
He wishes he didn't, but yeah, he knows about your friend Jihoon.
Jihoon is the guy who wrote you a handmade valentine in eighth grade, well after most of the boys decided that kind of stuff was gross. (Although you're certain he has no idea you know it was him.) This, you told Mingyu with a smile on your face as you walked him out of his company's Valentine's Day Ritz. You recounted that sweet little childhood friendship story with your arm looped through Mingyu's while he smiled and nodded and chuckled, but mostly he kept glancing at the shiny rings on both of your fingers. They're simple bands, his a little more worn since he takes it to work every day, yours exactly the condition it was when he surprised you with it. "You're in too deep, Mingyu," you'd said through a hypnotic laugh when he went down on one knee in the kitchen you share -- before agreeing to go along with his ruse anyway.
Your ring stays pristine because when you're not playing his better half, it lives in this little ceramic dish in the cubbyhole near the front door. You love that little dish -- it stole your heart when you spotted it and its black cat pattern at the local art market you went to together. Mingyu might like it too, seeing how he smiles at it (or maybe the ring) every time he leaves or comes home.
Which could mean anything.
This guy in front of him bristled at Mingyu's proclamation of "husband," metaphorical hackles raised, like a... black cat.
Fuck.
"Haha, uhm, anyways..." Mingyu had put his hand out instinctively, but when the guy doesn't reciprocate, it's fine. He didn't want to shake your friend Jihoon's hand, really. "Did you want to come in?"
Your touch on Jihoon's arm becomes preemptively supportive, like the guy could keel over at any moment, and for unknown reasons, Mingyu wants to be the one who's gone pale. To be the one you're touching while your friend Jihoon watches on from the sidelines.
Which could mean anything.
Because your friend Jihoon is only the guy walking into his home -- your home, yours and Mingyu's home, the home where his and your wedding/non-wedding bands live in a cute little dish in the cubbyhole near the front door. He's only the guy who had a weird depressive/ghosting episode the last time you were in a completely fake relationship to save some guy's ass. You told Mingyu this with your brows furrowed and a cute, confused pout on your lips as you wondered why your old friend was acting that way back then, right after you agreed to come to Mingyu's high school reunion with that ring on your finger.
Of course, Mingyu would normally never ask you to join him for an event outside of his company -- and you actually only agreed to pop in for a few minutes -- but one of his coworkers happens to be in a relationship with someone from his graduating class, and word got around and...well. He just likes when you're with him.
Which could mean anything.
Internally, when you told that one story about "my friend Jihoon" (one of many, many anecdotes), Mingyu was sure he knew exactly why the guy went oddly quiet after you started "dating" someone he wasn't, but he didn't comment on it. Instead, he asked what food from the reunion you'd want him to save for you when you show up.
Now, Mingyu doesn't have the luxury of brushing off some friend from your past who may or may not have absolutely definitely no-doubt-about-it had a thing for you. He can't just blow past it because that childhood friend is standing in his kitchen, eyes locked with yours over the huge glass of water he's chugging because you asked him to.
And you're laughing, endeared and with a sparkle in your eyes that Mingyu isn't sure if he's ever seen before.
You pat your friend Jihoon's head. A silent, good job, which Mingyu can't help watching.
He thought that was his and your thing.
The habit must've come from when you were younger...
Mingyu stands there, off to the side and feeling out of place in his own home.
My old friend Jihoon hates this stuff, but I'm obsessed with it. Jihoon, my friend from my hometown, once said I made the best belgian waffles, so you can trust me with the iron, I swear. You don't drink? My friend Jihoon doesn't either -- but not because he's sober or anything -- he's just got a major sweet tooth.
Oh, this is Jihoon's favourite song.
You go to the fridge to find something for your friend to eat, and while your back is turned, Jihoon looks over at Mingyu.
It's like an x-ray. Somehow, Jihoon's eyes land on him, and he feels bared to the world.
Mingyu knows Jihoon is in love with you. Could tell as soon as he saw him.
But, he realizes as your friend furrows his brow and looks at him with thinly veiled jealousy...
...Jihoon knows Mingyu is in love with you, too.
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nyrasbloodyclover · 1 month
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a hot welcome (modern!aegon targaryen x reader)
cw: smut, p in v, fingering, reader is a virgin, aegon targaryen is a perv, daeron bff,
a/n: i am not really satisfied with this, but i had to finish it. anyway, i am logging out for some time. see you soon!
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"I need you to help me pack, Daeron."
"No you don't, do it yourself. In case you forgot, I have to pack too."
Since you two became friends in freshman year, you were inseparable. You helped each other study, you hung out all the time and now he asked you to accompany him on his trip to visit his family, since they lived across the country.
"I thought you were finished! We have to leave in an hour!"
"This is why you don't have any friends. You think anyone would want to put up with this?"
"And this is why you don't have a girlfriend!"
You could've gone for hours like that, but it was really time to go.
Thirty minutes later, you were finished, and on your way.
The flight was pretty short, and you felt the nerves kicking in. The main reason Daeron asked you to come with him was that he didn't really like his family. Especially his brothers.
And from the stories you heard, you weren't a fan of them either.
Aegon was a drunk and a pervert (not Daeron's exact words, but your conclusion) and Aemond was cold and distant, emotionally unavailable probably.
Helaena was fine, she even visited a couple of times. Daeron rarely came home and his mother was very worried. She made him promise that he'd come once the school year was over.
You really had no other friends. You were glad you met him, but other people tend to be loud and too much work. You hated that.
Alicent picked you up from the airport, visibly on edge, because she wasn't very present during Daeron's childhood, but he never mentioned it. Not once. He was asking about his siblings and their pets and Alicent's new potential boyfriends. He was really nice and you loved him because of that. You tried to join their conversation, but failed so you kept quiet until you came home.
Once you got into the house Helaena was the one who greeted you, with a smile and a spider crawling up her arm.
"Oh my god! Wait, you have—" I tried to brush the little creature off, but she just laughed.
"That's my new pet. Wanna hold him?"
"Uh... Yeah, sure." She was kind and you really liked Helaena, you'd also like to get to know her better.
"Stop bothering her, sister. She just got here." It was an unfamiliar male voice and he was walking down the stairs.
Unkept shoulder length hair, dirty mouth and half closed eyes? Yes, that was Aegon.
"Why? So that you could bother her? Leave us alone."
You recognized him from Daeron's stories and he wasn't exaggerating, everything was on point. You could practically feel, not the mockery, but the perverse part of him coming to the surface.
"Hi. Aegon, right?"
His smile was twisted. "And for how long will this pretty thing be staying with us, Daeron?" He was walking over to the kitchen and your friend frowned at his brother.
"Aegon, don't."
"What?" He laughed, "It was merely a question."
Later that day, Daeron showed you your room, it was a guest room, larger than the apartment you shared with Daeron. His family was pretty wealthy.
If you'd only looked at Aegon, you could never tell.
While you were unpacking, you sensed someone's presence behind you, but before you could turn around, he was already sitting on your bed, looking like a very happy puppy. Who might do things to you if you let him.
"May I help you?"
"Yes, at least I think so. If you cooperate."
"Have you been drinking?"
"No," he giggled, he actually giggled.
"Would you please get out?"
Aegon got up and instead of leaving the room, he closed the door. You two were alone in your temporary bedroom.
"Aegon. Please get out, I don't want anything to do with you." But that was a lie. A big, fat, lie.
You wanted him to ruin you to your core, until there is nothing left for him to take. You never even had your first kiss.
It was the attention. Nobody gave you this much attention in your life, at least not in that way.
"Liar, liar, pants on fire..."
"You are so drunk. Isn't it almost dinner time? Are you going out?"
"No. Just came here...For you."
He stepped closer towards you and the back of your knees hit the bed. If he decides to come any closer, you'll have to crawl over your bed which you don't plan on doing.
Aegon could practically smell the innocence on you. It made him go mad. It made him go into his room and drink the whole bottle of wine in a heartbeat, only to be brought into your room, while you were bending over that bed, unpacking.
Daeron warned him, but he didn't give a shit. He's going to have you, one way or another.
Now you were all flushed, waiting for his next move and he didn't plan on wasting any more moments.
His hands were in your hair and in a second he was pulling you in and kissing you, devouring you and Aegon tried to slip his tongue inside your mouth, but you were still too stubborn.
You pulled away, pressing a hand over your mouth, like you've done something sinful. He loved the taste of you, and he wanted more of it.
"You..." You couldn't even look at him. How he wanted to spread you on that very bed until you can't walk.
He was ready to continue, but there was a knock on the door. Daeron.
"Dinner is ready. Mother already called, but I wasn't sure if you heard..."
"Coming!" You managed to get out, but your voice was shaky. Your face was burning.
During the dinner everyone ate silently, and at some point you could feel Aegon's knee brush against yours while he watched you from across the table. You tried to remain calm but your face grew hotter every second. You crossed your legs and he didn't fail to miss it.
His drunken eyes wandered over you, especially your cleavage in a shirt that was a bit more revealing. You forgot about it, but then cursed yourself for wearing it in such a moment.
It was thankfully over soon and you got to shower, finally! You were just finishing washing your hair when you heard the door open.
Aegon couldn't see anything, but you were paralyzed.
He took off his shirt and you had to admit, you wanted to be able to see somehow. You had no idea what his deal was, but it made your knees tremble.
"Aegon, what is it?"
"Nothing." You could see the outline of his body, he was completely naked now and he was walking towards you.
"Stop. I'm getting out. Give me a towel."
To your surprise, he obeyed and tossed you a large towel to wrap around your body. When you slid the door open his naked body flashed you, but you prepared mentally, so you didn't react, and certainly did not look anywhere besides his face and the smug expression he was giving you.
Despite your best efforts, you saw black ink of his tattoos and that was the last straw, you bolted from the bathroom.
It wasn't until you were in your room that you remembered you left your clean clothes there.
You cursed yourself, but took a spare shirt you had and used it as a pajama.
You peeked from your room to see if the bathroom was empty, and when you saw the light was out, you ran to get your things, but what took you by surprise is that the clothes were still there, all except for your underwear. Which was at the top of the pile.
Maybe you left them in your room, you didn't know, but you were too tired to care, anyway, so you got under the covers and took some time to read your book. You were so close to drifting away, but a strange noise awoke you. Like someone was in pain. It was the room beside yours.
No, not in pain, you realized, embarrassed. It was male moaning and occasional whimpering. And it was Aegon.
Was it possible that you got the room that was so close to his? You knew that he was doing that on purpose, touching himself, just to make you even more flustered.
You had trouble sleeping that night, refusing to acknowledge the pain and wetness between your legs. You woke up around four in the morning and decided to drink some cold water and try to calm down. Your heart was hammering against your chest, remembering the sounds of pleasure Aegon was making.
You opened your door, but before you could go down the stairs, you felt someone's hand on your mouth, pulling you backwards, until you were in another room. You didn't even get to panic properly. But of course, when you turned, it was Aegon who was smiling at you. It was almost dark in his room.
"What the fuck?" You whispered.
He didn't answer, but he did pull you towards him and start kissing you, no, swallowing your face would be more appropriate. It caught you off guard, but you weren't mad. You wanted him to take control, you were desperate for it.
"Ever been fucked?" He mumbled in between kissing.
"N...No," you breathed out, every part of your rationality leaving, there was just him, only him. He grinned and seemed quite satisfied with your answer. He wanted to be the one who is going to destroy you.
Just in your shirt, it was easy for him to start touching you immediately, not having to remove any clothing. You gasped at the feeling of his fingertips.
You ended up on his bed, not being able to see clearly, dizzy from the sight of him.
His fingers pulled your underwear to the side and slowly touched your clit, using your wetness to prepare you for him after slipping one finger inside of you.
"We are just getting started. Relax," he whispered the last word in your ear as his finger slid in and out. Aegon kissed your neck and collarbones, just to soothe you before slipping in another finger. He did his best to stretch your walls before entering you.
"Aegon," you covered your mouth with your hand, remembering where you were and who might hear you.
He looked at you like you were a piece of meat he was ready to butcher.
Telling you nothing more, you suddenly felt him rubbing himself against your folds. Teasing you at your entrance, making you squirm beneath him.
"I was going to wait. I really was." He grunted, but continued, "I couldn't do it, it was a perfect opportunity and this is how you're going to spend every night in this house."
Your hips moved, needing him to touch you, bury himself deep inside you. And that's precisely what he did.
He went slow. Just the tip, and then he went deeper and deeper, the pain growing, but it was quickly switched with pleasure.
He slammed his dick inside you, making you cry out in pain, not yet accustomed to him. "You're going to ride me so well, I know it." Aegon's fingers dig deep into your hips.
He even forgot to take off your panties, it was stretched to the side while he kept going in and out, without mercy.
You dragged your nails against his bare back, leaving red marks behind. You realized he probably slept just in his underwear.
He pulled himself out of you, making you gasp at the sudden emptiness.
"Shh, it's okay, come here," he gestured towards himself. Aegon was now laying down and you supposed you knew what he wanted. You were scared.
"But I've never— I don't know how—"
"Nonsense." He guided your hips towards his cock and pulled you down on him, again, very slowly and then started moving you in the rhythm that was good enough for both of you.
You continued as he showed you, his hands were on your ass, squeezing until it hurt.
You felt him deep, throwing your head back, but keeping your mouth shut.
Aegon grunted, but then a moan escaped his mouth, "Do it faster." And you tried to listen to him, you gave him your best and he seemed satisfied enough.
When you reached your peak, you stopped moving completely, letting yourself squeeze him, your thighs trembling. Aegon held your hips in place and then pulled out, but continued to rub himself on your still sensitive clit.
Your moans were what set him off and he came all over his and your stomach, gasping for air once you both fell on the bed beside each other.
"I am going to teach you so many things."
You just hoped nobody finds out. And when you turned your head you saw your missing underwear, sitting on top of Aegon's nightstand still wet.
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fastcardotmp3 · 1 year
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Eddie Munson does do the whole rock star thing, but it doesn't quite go the way it did in the daydreams of a sixteen-year-old kid trying to stay awake in school.
He leaves Hawkins after the world doesn't end, gets himself out there, takes all the hurt and fear and fucked up shit and puts it into a handful of good enough songs to get himself signed.
It's not quite the genre he grew up with, not quite something any of his idols might have played, but only because it is so entirely Eddie, so influenced by where he's been and what he's seen that it kind of doesn't fit one specific influence.
It's new and it's good, is the point. Really good. And he skyrockets fast enough to give himself the spins.
He's recognizable and then he's famous and then he's too famous and too young to know what to do with it and too far from home and everyone he loves to really cope with it and it's just.
Eddie isn't built for it. Eddie hasn't even processed the fact that he was maybe supposed to die in that place, or the fact that he did watch people better than him actually die, but he's out here shooting to the top of the charts and being called the next big thing and it's too much.
It's just enough, at the end of it all, for him to self-sabotage his way out of being more than a one-hit wonder.
One big hit, a contract broken by the guys at the top with the fancy lawyers because Eddie has become the too much thing, just like always, and it's over as quick as it started.
He disappears, becomes one of those whatever happened to him? he was supposed to be the next big thing? stories that travel by word of mouth and then fade with the shift in conversation.
So what does happen to Eddie Munson?
He falls hard, he hits rock bottom, he crawls his way home to an uncle who deserved for Eddie to really make it, make him proud, have him financially set for life and get him into a real house with two stories and a garage to park the truck in, maybe even a yard for a dog.
He spirals and isolates and falls apart and stops letting himself make music at all and makes some personal choices that will probably have lasting effects on him for the rest of his life and then somewhere along the line a girl with hair like tangerines and terrible aim manages to smack him with her cane and says if I learned to walk again, so can you, asshole.
There are people in his life again after that, a reason to get out of bed and realize that he can make Wayne proud in more ways than the one he'd already fucked straight to hell.
Eddie watches a bunch of kids graduate high school and then he packs up and chases down some people who pulled him out of hell once before up in Chicago, crashes on Steve and Robin's couch until he gets himself a job painting houses and they can afford three bedrooms instead of just the two.
He cuts his hair, not short but shorter, and he gets more tattoos and itches for the guitar that sits in a case under his bed, ignores it. Itches for the pen in his hand, ignores that too.
He's still barely past his mid-20s and he still has some fucking around left to get out of his system, some finding out to accomplish doubly so, but he learns as he goes no matter whether it's forwards or backwards.
He falls in love and falls out of it, gets fired from jobs and tracks down new ones, gets into fights with his friends because they're all a little fucked up and codependent and weird but makes up with them for the same reasons.
The thing with Steve happens slowly, going from tolerating each other for the sake of knowing they'll always be on the same team to genuinely liking each other to discovering a care between the two of them that's a bit too strong to be normal about even if it still takes them a half-dozen so-called turning points to really name it and take it and keep it.
Eddie's 33 when they buy a condo together on the outskirts of Chicago two weeks after they fall into bed with each other for the first time, and he's over a decade on from being a kid who rose to the top too fast but it doesn't feel dissimilar, that sensation of a too-good thing that's bound to go wrong.
Only this time he doesn't try to sabotage it, tries the opposite, tries to hold it tightly in ways that would probably be too tight for anyone other than Steve Harrington with all his deeply intense feelings and inability to love at anything other than an eleven.
It's in the move that Steve finds a box of notebooks, snoops because it's who he is, and finds years worth of words that never made it past the tip of a pen but did, eventually, make it that far.
And it's not an easy thing, convincing Eddie that they're words worth sharing, because Eddie doesn't want it to be an easy thing. He can't let kind words shoved into his orbit by a beautiful man be enough to make it feel worth it, can't see a world where sharing his art doesn't end in another great big self-induced mess that he can't let happen when he's finally found something good.
He doesn't want to go on tour and get screamed at on stage and, besides, he's pretty sure the rest of the world doesn't want to scream for him anymore either, but then Steve has to go and remind him--
"You don't have to be the face of it. You can just be the words; you are so fucking good at being the words, Ed."
Which still isn't quite enough to be convincing, but it's a start in a solid six months of the words coming easier now that he has someone to share them with, someone to listen as Eddie plucks away at a guitar that sits out in the open now, free of dust.
It stops feeling like something shameful to hide, his music, and the thing is? It doesn't feel how it did back then either.
It's not an escape or a purge of violent energy or a distraction from everything he didn't know how to think about. Sure, it takes all of that into consideration because it takes the whole of Eddie into consideration, but more than anything it's just fun.
Like he's thirteen and still learning how to play the guitar, like it's just a hobby that never has to go anywhere, like it's just art that maybe deserves to be heard.
Everyone pitches in on ideas when they find out he's trying to come up with a pseudonym, and it's goofy and supportive and kind of the final straw in reaching out to old, burned bridges to see about any new artists looking for equally new tunes.
The first time Eddie and Steve catch familiar lyrics being sung by a new hotshot band on the radio, Eddie cries not because he's jealous or disappointed, but because it feels right.
He doesn't like being up in front of the crowds, had only ever walked across tables and made himself big and scary and loud out of self preservation, would always rather his biggest performances be for the people he knows really care.. Besides, after everything he's survived he's learned, albeit slowly, that he really likes the freedom of the quiet.
This way he still gets to say what he has to say, gets to throw his hat into the ring of an artform that he loves without selling his soul to a machine that tried to eat him alive (trust him. he knows what that feels like.)
Of course, someone is going to put 2 and 2 together eventually, the industry isn't as big as it looks and pseudonyms only pull so much weight when you went out in such a spectacularly messy and memorable fashion, but Eddie's got his condo in Chicago.
He's got the guy he shares it with in his bed.
He's got two cats and a windowsill full of plants he's going to keep alive this time, Steve, just you watch.
He's got his uncle settled in Indy these days, a small place with a small yard.
He's got music, too. Turns out even his own tendency to self-destruct couldn't take that away, huh?
It's what got him out of hell alive, after all.
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yongility · 5 months
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NEO TV # I LIKE ME BETTER WHEN I'M WITH YOU. (jaehyun x reader) 3/?
genre: angst, suggestive, gang au, rich kid au, enemies to lovers (kinda), a lil of fluffy stuff. slowburn, series.
warnings: drug use mentions, gangs, fights, use of weapons, adult language, illegal activities, cheating (not on the main couple), toxic family environment, addictions, manipulation, insecurities, illegal street racing, death mentions. jeno is jaehyun's younger brother, angst, smut and if I slip something my bad haha.
word count: +10k?
a/n: I’m sorry this took too long to post!! 😭😭 but I been so busy with college rn, I’m going to graduate this year so I’m like having a lot of work lately, and I wasn’t satisfied with what I was writing so that was the reason it took longer than expected, sorry!
I'm a sucker for cliche stuff so as soon as this fic popped in my mind l had to write it down, english isn't my first language tho.
I'm sorry if this is too long TT, but this is kinda a slowburn? it might contain a lot of parts so wait for part 3! One of the reasons this is long af it's because I would like to show you how Jaehyun and (Y/N's life is before they get together! So pls pls don't skip anything I hope you like it!
if you want to be in the taglist, just lemme know;) enjoy!
The third day of the week arrived promptly, where (Y/N) found herself comfortably seated in one of the library chairs, with her chemistry books scattered on the table in front of her as she studied for the exams she had coming up, with Jungwoo beside her.
It was becoming her routine for the week; after last Friday's party, what she most desired was to avoid being at home, especially after having an argument with her mother when she returned from the party.
She didn't want to deal with her in a good time.
Annoyed that her mother had thought it was a great idea to take away her right to use her own car as punishment for disobeying her that night and leaving the house... staying in the library seemed the most pleasant option; with silence, able to listen to music through her AirPods, without her mother bothering her every five minutes and being able to review what she had learned in her last classes: it was something she could take advantage of. She took a sip of her vanilla latte, which had been sponsored by Jungwoo, who, in an attempt to apologize for abandoning her in that way during last Friday's party, promised to pay for each of her daily drinks for a week and a half, no matter the cost.
And even though (Y/N) could afford that or even triple, she was still happy about it. Gifted things tasted even better anyway.
Of course, she first gave Jungwoo a -no- beating after telling him everything that had happened during his absence, but still, she appreciated that her friend was okay even though she hadn't heard anything from him until Saturday night.
During these last few days, with a new routine, (Y/N) was almost always in the same places, at the same times, and if she was honest, she was surprised not to have bumped into Jung Jaehyun at any moment.
It was weird; she would normally see him somewhere around the school, either accompanied by Lucas or just sitting on one of the benches while smoking his 'n' cigarette of the day. But simply, since Friday, she hadn't heard anything from him... she hadn't even bumped into Lucas, which increased the level of strangeness, considering he was a social butterfly, he was always around. (Y/N) had been aware of her words after Jaehyun had taken her home: she could no longer continue with whatever deal they had, with all the stress of her own tasks and knowing that no matter what she did, her cousin wouldn't give up his addictions, it was best to give up.
Although it would hurt her soul to know that there was no way to help Daeho.
But thinking about it, she didn't know if she had really been sincere about each going their own way... apparently Jaehyun had taken it very seriously to not show up anywhere, and although (Y/N) knew very well that being close to him didn't bring her anything good... his presence hadn't been so bothersome in the last few days. Really, after sharing a few words and spending more time with him, she couldn't say that she disliked his existence. It was funny if you asked the (Y/N) from a month ago, there would be no way she could have imagined that, somehow, she would be related to none other than Jung Jaehyun, who, on the outside, just seemed to be one more problem.
She tried to stop thinking about it and tried to focus her gaze on the book in front of her, but after a few minutes... it was difficult for her. There was something inside her that made her feel uneasy but she couldn't think what it was.
"There’s a race in Kosmo today" her best friend's voice brought her out of her thoughts.
Kosmo was the neighborhood that was right in the middle of the city, dividing Kwangya and Neo Zone. (Y/N) knew that there were usually illegal races in that area because it was when the rich kids from Kwangya usually dared to compete against Neo Zone.
"And why should I care...?"
"Your cousin will go to bet," Jungwoo replied, interrupting her study session.
The girl opened her eyes in surprise and asked, "How do you know?"
"Daeho told Mingi, and Mingi told me," he replied simply, shrugging his shoulders. The boy fell silent for a moment and cleared his throat. "Don’t you want to go?" He asked curiously.
(Y/N) looked up from her books and observed her friend incredulously. "Why would I want to go?"
"To keep an eye on Daeho," he answered.
"I'm still mad with him, I've decided not to help him anymore. I really tried, I've been trying for the past few years, but he doesn't want help and now I understand," the girl confessed, closing her book and letting out a sigh.
"Still... don't you think it would be fun? Getting out of our comfort zone a bit... seeing what all this racing stuff is about. I've heard they're amazing," Jungwoo insisted.
"Jungwoo, my mom will kill me if she finds out I went to an illegal race," the girl continued, taking a sip of her coffee.
"She won't find out."
"Jungwoo..."
"Come on, (Y/N), we won't even be in Neo Zone, it'll be in Kwangya only. We'll go, watch the race, and leave. We won't even make contact with anyone. We'll go on our own," the boy assured her, moving closer to her. "Please, I think it would be interesting to break out of our routine, just for one night, what could go wrong?"
"Many things could go wrong, Woo," she replied.
"We won't know unless we try," he pouted, clasping his hands together. "Please."
She hated how persuasive her best friend was.
She sighed and shook her head. "Fine, but at the first sign of trouble, we're leaving without a second thought."
"I love you so much," Jungwoo replied, hugging her shoulders.
"And I really hate you."
______________________________________________
The night fell faster than she expected, and among the roar of engines and the intense music that could be heard on the outskirts of Kosmo, (Y/N) felt something cold run through her body.
She could see familiar faces here and there, some of her classmates from Kwangya were in the place, and from the opposite side, the cars and familiar faces of Neo Zone were present.
It was a strange atmosphere for her; she had always played it safe, and now she didn't even know what to think. She felt herself getting closer to Jungwoo to not lose him, the last thing she needed was for them to separate like they did at the party.
She didn't think she could survive alone.
And it's not that she was dumb to think otherwise, but her parents raised her in an environment where they made her believe that she shouldn't do things outside her daily life. (Y/N) was afraid of adventures. Her life was governed by being obedient and doing the right thing; she didn't know when the moment of rebellion she had a few days ago when she left home the night of the party had been wise.
And now finding herself in Kosmo secretly from her mother at an illegal race? She must have gone crazy.
She believed even more so that she had gone crazy when something inside her hoped to run into none other than Jung Jaehyun.
She didn't understand why the urgency of what was happening, and even less why she expected to run into Jaehyun before running into Daeho.
Maybe it was because she found it strange not to have seen him since last Friday's party.
But she knew that if there was one place Jaehyun wouldn't miss... it would be the race tonight.
"Are you looking for Daeho?" Jungwoo asked when he saw her looking around. "He's probably with Mingi."
How could she explain to her friend that the person she was looking for was none other than Jung Jaehyun?
She nodded without saying more, and they both continued on their way while cautiously observing their surroundings. The smell of marijuana and car engines was embedded in the place, the music made their ears ring, and the night breeze made their bodies tremble.
(Y/N)'s eyes drifted away when she noticed Lucas in the distance, having a conversation with another guy. Lucas felt her gaze on him and looked at the girl with confusion before approaching her after apologizing to his companion.
"Hey, Kwangya kiddos, what brings you here on this magnificent night?" Lucas asked enthusiastically.
"We wanted to know what these races are about," Jungwoo replied simply.
"Hmm, interesting," the tall guy nodded. "Well, you're in luck, Jaehyun will race today, are you sure you want to see the show? The best of the area against someone from Yellow Wood," Lucas explained while cracking his fingers slightly.
Upon hearing the guy's name, (Y/N) looked up and paid attention to Lucas's words.
"If you're interested in betting, come to me," Lucas advised.
"I think we're fine like this," said (Y/N).
"Alright, take care. I'll go look for my guy to get him ready for the race," Lucas announced as he patted Jungwoo on the back.
The guy walked away from them with a smile, and Jungwoo responded with one of his own, then he looked at his friend and frowned, "relax, you're anxious."
How could she not be?
But before she could even answer anything, a few meters away, she saw the familiar face she had been looking for. In the distance, the silhouette of Jung Jaehyun was leaning against his car while talking to a few guys from Neo Zone, his neck tattoos weren't very visible due to the darkness of the night but she could distinguish them a bit, then... as if he had called him, Jaehyun's gaze moved to connect with hers, making her freeze in place.
Jaehyun frowned when he saw her standing just a few steps away from him, looking like a lost puppy as she stood beside Jungwoo.
The sight reminded him of a month ago when Daeho had clumsily brought (Y/N) to Neo Zone. Although this time she was accompanied by her best friend, another rich and spoiled kid from Kwangya. He observed the outfit she had decided to wear, once again, just like that time, it wasn't extravagant, no famous brand could be seen in her attire, and the only piece of jewelry she wore was a pair of earrings that definitely looked like gold...
He hoped she wouldn't lose them tonight.
Because they made her look good.
The surprise was evident on the girl's face when she took a better look at the brunet's body, who was now walking towards her, wearing a hoodie with its hood over his head and as he got closer, the darkness of the night was no longer so intrusive. It hadn't been enough to hide the bruises that were scattered across his body.
There was one under his cheek, just below his left eye, and it was reddish, as if it were flushed. Then, looking at the ones between his jaw and his neck, she noticed how they subtly mixed with the ink of the tattoo he had on his neck. That one was difficult to distinguish thanks to the dark lines that adorned that part of his body, but if you paid enough attention, it was alarming.
When she lowered her gaze over his torso and then looked at his hands, she could see the intense shades of red that his knuckles contained, as if ground blood had accumulated on each of them.
It wasn't the first time she had seen Jaehyun or Lucas with a bruise or two on a school day, but it was the first time she had seen it up close.
Her heart was pounding a mile a minute. Why was it suddenly doing this?
"Did you lost your way home?" Jaehyun asked when he was in front of her.
"Jaehyun," she muttered quietly, "... are you okay?"
The girl didn't need much to realize that was the stupidest question she could ask right now, of course he wasn't okay. And although she knew this happened regularly in Jaehyun's life, she couldn't help but fill her head with doubts; what had to happen for him to end up like this?
... was that the reason he hadn't gone to school?
A small smile appeared on the boy's face, and even with the different colors decorating his face, she could still notice the dimples that formed in it.
Why did he still look good?
"I don't think you came here to ask that, Angel," Jaehyun replied mockingly. "I really believed in your whole story about us going on our ways, so what are you doing at a race where most of the spectators are from Neo Zone?"
The girl was left speechless. "Jungwoo brought me here."
"Well, if that's the case, enjoy the races, I think it'll be fun for you to spice up your Wednesday nights a bit," he continued with a sarcastic smile.
"What happened to you?" She asked again.
Jaehyun didn't answer.
He had gotten himself into big trouble... all thanks to Jeno.
He had trusted that all his merchandise would be sold by the time Monday came around, but after being at Johnny Suh's party, where other dealers were also present, he didn't manage to sell what he needed.
He had a little less than half left in his pockets and in Lucas's.
Luck had not been on his side this time, and when he had to be accountable to Lee Sooman, he had to take responsibility for his brother's actions. And despite telling him that he would not take care of him like he used to after the argument they had... he'd much rather take the beatings he had received than see Jeno the way he did in the mirror.
That time, it really felt eternal. He still remembers the angry (but also mocking) look Sooman had on his face when Jaehyun and Lucas brought the money to his office and after asking Lucas none too kindly to leave, that was when Jaehyun knew what was coming.
With Cheol Uk by his side, leading him out of the office to the vacant lot not far from the warehouse, Jaehyun could do nothing but accept what was coming.
It was one blow after another, and he knew well that at that moment, defending himself was not something he should do or he would end up worse.
He remembers feeling every punch with tremendous pain, and all he could think about was Jeno and how he would have felt if it had been him getting beaten up.
At least Jaehyun was used to the beatings and had no choice; he already knew that all of this was part of being someone from Neo Zone, so he simply had to continue to comply with what Sooman demanded to the letter unless he wanted to end up again in the position he was in.
What felt like hours was really just a few minutes; Cheol Uk stopped hitting him after a while and without saying more, he left. Leaving Jaehyun in the middle of the vacant lot with a broken lip and eyebrow as he spat blood and reached for his abdomen for some support to get up and walk to where he knew Lucas was waiting for him.
How much more? How much longer would he have to keep with all of this?
But, right now, it wasn't something he should talk about.
"It's really not something you need to know," he replied with a smirk. "You came to enjoy the race, right? Then do it, I'll be running in a few minutes, if you don't get scared by the atmosphere here before that, I'm sure you'll want to see me," Jaehyun continued, winking at her.
"I think it'll be fun to see you in second place," the girl teased.
"Baby... I always win," Jaehyun bragged, looking her directly in the eyes.
It was then that the girl didn't say anything else, she just kept her gaze on his. She hated feeling intrigued by Jaehyun himself. Because right now she didn't even feel like she was in Kosmo, with Jaehyun in front of her looking directly at her, she didn't even feel real. She was getting into fire and she knew it.
And she didn't know if she could escape from it.
For a moment she felt a heaviness on her shoulders and warmth surrounded her, causing her to snap out of her thoughts and notice that the jacket that Jaehyun was wearing over his hoodie was now over her body.
"You were trembling like a chihuahua," Jaehyun explained. "Don't consider it an act of kindness, I'm just returning the favor after having done my jobs those two weeks... at least now they won't kick me out of school this evaluation period," he continued.
"I'm not sure if I should feel good knowing that I'm indirectly helping an illegal business," she replied, adjusting the jacket.
"No one needs to know," he replied. "Good luck tonight, don't get lost too much because things get interesting," he said, and without further ado, he turned around to go back to his friends.
(Y/N) stood perplexed in her place, and it was then that she felt Jungwoo's presence next to her.
"What was that?"
"I have no idea."
_______________________________________________
The next morning, after putting her books back in her backpack, (Y/N) looked at the jacket folded inside her bag, feeling a heaviness and remembering the events of the previous night.
The rumors were true... Jung Jaehyun was the best street racer in the area, because he not only competed once the day before, but two more times, winning 3 victories in a short time, and to be honest, it had been impressive.
She hadn't run into him again after the brief conversation they had, and even though she had been waiting for it... she and Jungwoo bolted from the place when they heard the police sirens approaching Kosmo.
The last thing she needed was for her parents to find out about her escapade.
She didn't hear anything from Daeho the night before, she even doubted if he had really gone to the race.
She didn't want to give too much importance to the situation, which is why she chose to continue her path through the school hallways, hoping to return the jacket that was at the bottom of her bag and trying to divert her thoughts to something other than Jaehyun.
And as if she had summoned him, she saw him under the entrance roof as he leaned against the wall and took a drag from the cigarette in his hands. (Y/N) checked the day's weather and cursed when she noticed the raindrops falling lightly. She had forgotten about today's forecast.
Jaehyun was lost in his thoughts as he watched the rain and let out the smoke in his chest.
The bruises were still visible.
She stopped abruptly to take the jacket out of her bag and, without saying anything, approached him and handed it back to him.
Jaehyun looked at her with a raised eyebrow and blew out the smoke from his lungs.
"You're welcome," Jaehyun said as he took the jacket in his hands.
"Yes, thank you," she said, feeling her cheeks flush.
"Where did you park your car?" Jaehyun asked out of nowhere.
"I didn't bring it with me, my mom confiscated it," she blurted out without thinking, and when she turned to look at Jaehyun, she noticed a mocking smile on his face.
"Oh, mom took away your Porsche," he pouted mockingly and shook his head. "Come on, I'll take you home."
"I'm fine, Jaehyun. Thanks," she said as she looked at the rain.
"Come on, it wouldn't be the first time I've taken you. Plus, the school won't be closing anytime soon."
She thought about all the possibilities that crossed her mind, but something about her was excited to think about the ride home.
"Where's your car?"
______________________________________________
It was fortunate that his car was nearby.
Jaehyun turned on the heater as soon as they got into the car, and without further ado, the journey began.
It was just like the first time they had been together in the same car. Without saying anything, both with their eyes focused on the road, and it was then that they both realized that they didn't have a topic of conversation. The few times they had interacted had been about their interests and what they needed from each other at the moment. However, Jaehyun didn't know anything about (Y/N) that he hadn't heard at school, and (Y/N) didn't know anything about Jaehyun that she hadn't heard in the hallways or from her parents about the people from Neo Zone.
At this point, they weren't even acquaintances.
They had just coincided in something and that was it.
(Y/N) took the opportunity to send a text message to Jungwoo and tell him that he no longer needed to pick her up, without explaining more, she sent the text and subsequently, Jaehyun's phone rang.
The boy sighed and cautiously looked for a quick place to park even with the sound of the mobile phone ringing filling the car. He took the device and (Y/N) could notice the slight tension that seized Jaehyun's body as he read the caller ID, without thinking twice he answered the call.
The brunette felt weird being able to hear Jaehyun's conversation, so she tried to distract herself with something else. First with her phone, then looking out the window where she could see the rain beginning to dissipate, and then she could hear a "I'll be there in a moment" that made her react and turn to see him end the call.
The boy scratched his neck and then brought his hands to his face to rub it, let out a deep sigh, and looked at (Y/N).
“Uh, I need to do something quickly and your house is still a bit far... Do you mind if we stop by that place first? It's on the way” he asked with no other option.
“Does this has to do with your job?” She asked.
It took him a moment to respond: — No, it's not about my job. You can stay in the car, it's just that, I really need to get there.
After seeing Jaehyun's face and not being able to decipher what he was trying to say, (Y/N) nodded, not very sure, and that was enough for Jaehyun to quickly start the car.
Thousands of thoughts ran through (Y/N)'s mind. Eager to know where they were headed; she didn't know if she should believe Jaehyun that this wasn't about picking up or delivering goods or meeting someone who worked on the same thing he did.
She was only sure they wouldn't go to Neo Zone because they were far from there.
She could see how impatient Jaehyun seemed while driving, and that only made her even more nervous. What exactly did they tell him in that call to make him like this? She wanted to ask, but she knew she wouldn't get an answer.
She didn't know how many minutes had passed, she only knew that the rain stopped just before the car parked and she finally noticed where they were. A gray building was a few meters away from them, and it wasn't hard to recognize it.
It was the National Rehabilitation Center.
A long and large building, which was accompanied by an extensive garden, and from the outside, you could see that there were a huge number of rooms inside it.
Her head was flooded with even more questions knowing that this was the place where Jaehyun was needed.
“You can stay in the car if you want. I'll be back in a moment” Jaehyun said as he opened the car door and got out.
Curiosity got the better of her.
And that's why she got out of the car and followed Jaehyun. Without saying anything, they entered the building where they were immediately greeted by a nurse who seemed to know the boy well.
“Jaehyun, I'm glad you were able to answer the call” said the woman as she greeted them. “We need to talk to you”.
The boy nodded and turned to (Y/N), who just nodded and said, “I’ll wait for you.”
He smiled slightly and walked with the person until they reached the reception where she was able to pull out a few papers.
It had been, perhaps, about two weeks since the last time he had been there. A place he was very familiar with and where he regularly went; he had become good friends with the friendly nurses who apparently didn't care where he came from.
He was grateful that the nurse didn't say anything when his bruises and wounds were clearly visible.
“Has something happened?” he asked after a few seconds.
“ He's fine” the nurse said with a smile “but we need to talk to you about his stay here” she continued.
That's when the small smile on his face disappeared. Jaehyun knew what she was referring to. He swallowed hard before the nurse could speak.
“The payment is overdue, Jaehyun," the nurse confirmed what he already knew. "We care about Sicheng's health, but this is not my concern. You know that the center relies on patients' monthly payments, and the administrators in charge of them request them punctually," she commented as she handed Jaehyun one of the papers. "I understand your situation and Sicheng's, but there's nothing more I can do even if I wanted to; I've tried to delay the payment as much as I could, but unfortunately, it can't be delayed any longer. The administrators expect the payment soon, or we'll have to discharge Sicheng and send him home," she concluded.
It was difficult at first for Jaehyun to process everything the nurse had said, as more than ten things ran through his mind at once; one of them being his good friend Winwin, then, thinking about how he could quickly get the money he knew he owed to the clinic, considering the beating he had just received for not being able to complete a sale. So, what would he do? He still needed half the money for that monthly payment, and between the clinic's expenses and those of his own house for his family, he couldn't see a way to get the money on time.
He would have to ask for more stash to sell if he wanted to do it.
He couldn't let them discharge Sicheng.
Not while he hasn't made progress.
"I'm sorry," Jaehyun said. "I... I still have a little left to complete the payment. It's just that lately, it's been harder, and... how much time do I have to pay it?" the breathless boy asked.
"Considering that it's only the first few days of the month, and the payment is already two weeks late... I can't give you more than three days," lamented the nurse, making a grimace.
"I'll try the impossible to bring you that money on Saturday. Sicheng still can't be discharged; he hasn't progressed the way he was supposed to," he affirmed, a slight pout evident in his mouth.
What a contrast there was between his expression and the bruises, accompanied by the tattoos on his body.
Being in the Rehabilitation Center was the place where he could be most vulnerable.
"How is he?" he asked, lowering his gaze.
"Same as the last time you came to visit him," commented the nurse. "We're doing what we can, Jaehyun, but as long as he stays the way he is, we can't move forward. We need his will to help him."
When no words came out of his mouth, the nurse continued: "Jaehyun, you know you can go see him."
For Jaehyun, each visit was just as difficult as the day he decided to admit Sicheng to that clinic, and each one left him more tormented than the previous.
He would give everything if that means that Sicheng would go back to be himself.
He nodded after a few seconds and cautiously glanced back, where, not far away, (Y/N) was reading some brochures and observing the facilities around them; when she noticed the boy's gaze on her body, she walked toward him carefully.
The brunette didn't really know what came to his mind or what caused those words to come out of his mouth, but when he wanted to back off, it was too late, because they had already been expressed.
"Are you coming with me?"
And although (Y/N) had no idea why they were there or where they were going, she accepted anyway. So they found themselves walking down the long whitewashed hallway until they reached an elevator, and then they went up about three floors.
The atmosphere was cold, the hallways and rooms were well-lit, and they could see a few nurses and what she assumed were doctors walking around in their lab coats.
Jaehyun didn't know why he was allowing himself to show her that part of his life, especially when it was such a fragile part for him. He had tried to protect it cautiously for the past few months, and now he was there, accompanied by Hwang (Y/N), with the person he never thought he would meet at that moment.
He hadn't really thought of her when he asked if they could go there before going home; his head was only thinking about the clinic and Sicheng when the call had ended, and it was too late to change his mind when they had set off.
He just hoped the girl would be discreet enough.
They reached room 119, where Jaehyun pushed the door open and where in a wheelchair, they both could see Winwin, who was facing the large window of his room, looking outside.
(Y/N)'s surprised face did not go unnoticed; she was confused in a thousand ways. She knew who Dong Sicheng was; everyone in her school knew him, however... she thought he had simply left the city. She had no idea he was in that place. So in her head, thousands of questions arose about him, why he was there, and why he was in a wheelchair.
She could only react when she heard Jaehyun's voice: "Hey, buddy. How are you today?"
Nothing.
That's what he received.
Jaehyun walked over to him, and when he stood next to him, he crouched down enough to be able to observe him better. Winwin had his gaze fixed forward, his cheeks were a little rosy, his hair fell over his forehead, and his hands were resting on his legs.
Jaehyun sighed.
"Oh, I see you've taken a shower today," the boy mentioned with a smile, and again, there was not a single response.
When he noticed the presence of the girl, who had remained in her place throughout the visit and hesitated to approach them, he spoke: "Today I'm not alone; I brought company. Maybe you'll find it helpful to hear another voice that isn't mine or Lucas's... or the nurses'," the boy teased and gestured to the brunette to come closer, who obeyed. "Do you remember (Y/N)? She was in our class; we've coincided a couple of times, that's why she's here."
"Hello, Winwin," she greeted softly. Jaehyun made a grimace and stood up from his place to be at the girl's height.
"Don't expect an answer," Jaehyun commented. "There won't be one."
"I thought... I thought Winwin had moved to China," (Y/N) confessed.
Jaehyun snorted: "Yes, that's what everyone thinks."
Those words took her by surprise, and it was when she decided to remain silent, watching from a distance the little interaction between the boys: it was just Jaehyun saying a few words while adjusting Sicheng's hair without expecting any response.
Dong Sicheng and Jung Jaehyun had been friends since birth, being two little boys who grew up on the streets of Neo Zone, it was easy to click with each other. Winwin's parents had decided to move to the infamous area after his father had met Lee Sooman in some low neighborhood in Wenzhou, China, and he had offered him a job where he could have his family at least a little better off than in his country.
Winwin had not joined the gang since it had not been of great urgency to him; his father was the active member needed by the family, and if he were honest... the farthest he could be from the Neo Zone gang... the better. He was always Jaehyun's companion at all times. Best friends who shared every detail of their lives for years, Jaehyun took care of Sicheng, and he provided the most sincere friendship he had ever had... then, a while later, Lucas Wong and Mark Lee joined their adventures.
Four boys from Neo Zone with the desire to conquer the world, but unable to leave their sad reality behind.
Jaehyun still remembers that fateful day a year ago, and he still feels like it happened yesterday.
The guilt gnawed at him every passing day, terrorizing each of his nights as he wondered: Why?
Why did something like that have to happen to someone as good as Dong Sicheng was?
A year ago, when Jaehyun had chosen to go deliver a package of stash after Winwin had asked him to stay and keep him company, and he had denied that request... that decision still drilled into his head.
Winwin's family and he had been robbed in their own home. Knowing who had done it, the reasons for the event, and who had ordered such inhumanity, were still a mystery. When Winwin's parents along with him tried to flee the place by leaving in a car; it had not been the wisest decision they had made at the moment... because not long after, outside of Neo Zone, after the group of people who had robbed their home managed to shoot a clean shot in one of the tires of the rear part of the car, causing Winwin's father to lose control of his own vehicle and not a few meters later it would impact hard enough for the car to be shot in another direction, causing immediate damage.
Jaehyun only remembers receiving a call from Lucas and minutes later finding himself at the entrance to the Emergency Room of the General Hospital, where a stretcher with Winwin's body was being transported.
He remembers seeing the blood. He remembers hearing Lucas and Mark's screams asking to see their friend. He remembers standing still at the entrance to the Emergency Room.
But above all, he remembers thinking, what would have happened if instead of deciding to go sell that stupid package of stash, what if he had stayed at home with his mother and Sicheng?
A week in a coma and a diagnosis of paraplegia was what made Jaehyun lose his mind.
It had been a year since the accident, and Winwin had not even progressed a bit. After being diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder, it had been difficult to help the injury in the dorsal spine that he had suffered; the damage had been partial, Winwin could handle his movements and his sensitivity to walk again... if only he would come out of the state of shock he was still in.
There were too many things he experienced in so few minutes, so much physical and mental pain for what happened, that now, Sicheng couldn't react.
It had been a year since Sicheng hasn’t spoken.
The doctors assured that he could hear and understand everything, but he was simply mentally tired to process the words and make them come out of his mouth.
His body didn't react as it should either.
And until Winwin had the strength of his own will to do it, the only thing they could do at that clinic was to keep him on medication so that the pains would not persist.
But Jaehyun couldn't take it anymore.
What he would give for Sicheng to be able to enjoy life again.
Unfortunately, the visits he made to the hospital... didn't last more than half an hour since that was the place's regulation. So, his farewell was as quick as his arrival.
"See you on Saturday, Win," he put his hand on his shoulder. "Don't give the nurses too much trouble."
He could swear he heard Winwin laugh and say goodbye.
Even though that really didn't happen.
(Y/N), who throughout the visit remained silent observing both boys, could feel her heart in her hand. She had never believed she would see that vulnerability on Jaehyun's part, and knowing what it was about because of the importance his best friend had in his life, made her heart ache with sadness even more.
"Now I'll take you home," murmured Jaehyun when he passed by her without saying anything else.
The girl glanced back, looking for the last time at Sicheng's silhouette, who hadn't moved from the same place since they had both arrived in the room. She took a deep breath and left the room when Jaehyun was already far enough away.
She didn't know what to say. There were no words of comfort for the situation, and she knew it, that's why they both silently said goodbye to the nurse who had received them and continued like that until they entered the car, which was not parked far away.
Jaehyun allowed himself to lean back on the driver's seat as he closed his eyes and sighed heavily.
"I guess you have many questions," Jaehyun said without opening his eyes.
She had.
"I don't know if I really should ask them," (Y/N) confessed as she looked at him.
The boy remained silent for a few seconds.
"Sicheng and his parents had an accident a year ago," Jaehyun said, opening his eyes to look at her. "An accident that was caused."
"By whom?"
"No one knows," he replied, taking his hands to the steering wheel of the car and squeezing it tightly. "His parents died instantly... Winwin arrived at the hospital in critical condition; it was a miracle that he came out alive."
"Why...?"
"Why is he in this clinic?" he interrupted, and she nodded with a knot in her stomach. "The accident had a great impact and damaged on his dorsal spine; the doctors diagnosed partial paraplegia; his sensitivity in his legs was minimal, and he couldn't make any extensive movements with his legs that didn't make him cry from the pain. After seven days, he woke up from the coma and realized everything that had happened, including my uncle's death... he hasn't said a single word since then... the doctors said it would take time for him to recover, and that eventually, he would speak, but Winwin doesn't have the will to do it; he's still in a kind of state of shock, and that has delayed his recovery," he explained, unable to see her in the eyes.
"Who... who pays for all this if Sicheng's parents aren't here?" she asked curiously.
Jaehyun sighed; "For the first few months, my boss covered part of the monthly fee, until suddenly he stopped doing it. Since then, I've been taking care of it."
The girl's expression was one of surprise.
"How do you do it?"
"That’s the reason I'm in the business that I'm in," he replied, changing his gaze to her, being able to see directly into her eyes and causing her to feel a shiver run through her body.
There was something about those bruised eyes that had done something to her.
"It must be hard," the girl said in a murmur.
Jaehyun snorted and nodded slowly. He hated being seen in his less tough character. The only person he allowed himself to be like that with was Lucas... or Winwin. And for a stranger to see him like that... made his blood boil.
"You know? Winwin loved dancing," Jaehyun said, smiling sideways as the memory came to his mind.
That fact wasn't strange for (Y/N), she remembers seeing Winwin at the school theater... the only boy from Neo Zone who was part of the dance team. She didn't even know how he had managed that, but he must have been good if the Kwangya students allowed him to be in the group.
"Now nobody knows if he'll be able to do it again," Jaehyun continued. "Winwin was the only one of all of us who really had a future, he wasn't even a gang member... he hadn't even gone through his initiation, and look how he ended up."
(Y/N) swallowed.
"Mark Lee is no longer friends with you, right?" The girl asked curiously.
"Things got complicated with him after the accident."
The brunette fell silent for a moment and then shifted her body to face him.
“Haven't you thought about looking for another alternative?” she questioned again “You know? If you let me help you, maybe I could get you a position at my father's company and...”
“Shh. I think I've told you it's not that easy.”
“ But it could be” she insisted.
Jaehyun scoffed and shook his head as he looked away from her.
“I not only have to cover this quota, I also have to bring money home, for my mom and for Jeno. It's the easiest way to get what I need” he confessed “besides, I told you once... in Neo Zone there's no way out, once you're in, you're in forever.”
The tattoos on his neck were what sentenced him to a miserable life forever.
But as long as that miserable life helped to ease the pain and managed to make Sicheng return to who he was, it would be worth it.
“It doesn't have to be like this” she murmured, focusing on her own hands.
"You don't know what it's like to be part of this," he countered in a low voice.
How had they opened up to have such a conversation so suddenly?
The girl felt her lip tremble as she remembered the scene she had witnessed minutes earlier in that room, and she couldn't help but think about how it would feel to lose a loved one in such a way... knowing that physically they were present, but mentally they weren't there.
(Y/N) had always had a heart easy to move, but she really never believed that Jung Jaehyun would be able to achieve that.
"Is that why you insist on continuing school?" she asked, looking at him again.
"Students are my best clients," he replied with a half smile.
(Y/N) didn't know how to take that.
She closed her eyes for a moment and then said, "I can help you with a few more assignments," she assured. "But only for a while and in my own way. But, I don't want you to involve me in any of the problems you're in, it will only be school matters. I don't want to be associated with anything you do, if anything you do is enough to help Sicheng, I'll try not to question it."
Jaehyun couldn't believe what he had just heard.
"If that helps you help me and me stay in school..." he paused "...I might be willing."
"What's the reason for your change of heart?"
"Because if I were in the same situation as you, I would also want someone to somehow help me," she replied, hugging herself.
The boy nodded with a half-smile, and without further ado, he started the car.
"Only school matters," Jaehyun confirmed.
She definitely didn't know what he had just gotten himself into.
______________________________________________
The day after the visit to the National Rehabilitation Center, something happened that made (Y/N) unable to concentrate enough during class hours. Her mind kept going back to the place over and over again, but how horrible was the situation the boy was in. One day you're capable, and the next... not even being able to move. How could anyone endure that?
At some point in the morning, during the physics period, her mind was spinning, her leg moving anxiously, and she bit her lips. She tried to erase the conversation she and Jaehyun had had the day before a thousand times and tried to erase the image of Winwin in that room.
But it was impossible.
Just when she thought she had succeeded, the image returned immediately.
She hated being someone who cared too much about things.
Because she knew something wasn't right with her when she found herself in front of the doors of the Rehabilitation Center.
Her coat shielded her from the cold breeze on that day, and as she clutched her bag to her, she didn't think anymore and entered the place.
She felt a little out of place when she entered the center, but after a few minutes, a presence came in front of her.
"Hello, good morning," the nurse greeted her. "Oh, you're the girl who accompanied Jaehyun yesterday, right?" She asked in confusion.
The girl smiled and nodded. "Yes, I'm Hwang (Y/N). I'm Jaehyun's classmate... and Winwin's."
"How nice of you to visit us... are you here to see Winwin? It's rare to see someone come for him other than Lucas or Jaehyun," confessed the nurse.
"Um, yes... I could say I'm here for a visit," the girl smiled. "But, to be honest... yesterday I overheard a bit of his conversation with Jaehyun... I know Winwin's payment is delayed this month."
"Yes, usually Jaehyun finds a way to pay on time," she sighed. "But this month it's been delayed for a few weeks, and if I'm honest, I've been doing everything I can to keep Winwin from being discharged."
The girl nodded and asked, "Do you think Winwin's treatment will still take time?"
"I can't answer that accurately," admitted the nurse. "It's all a matter of Winwin's will, but to be honest, right now he has no will at all, so far as we're concerned, and if the payment continues to be monthly... he could spend another half a year here."
The girl understood the situation, and although she would like to think more about it... she didn't, so she didn't even know when she blurted out those words: "Is there any way I can pay for the next six months?"
The nurse's eyes widened with surprise, and she looked at the girl with enthusiasm. "Are you serious?"
"Yes," she replied. "I would like to help one of my classmates as long as I can. Money is not a problem," she confessed.
"Wow... thank you, i really appreciate that. Winwin is a boy with a lot of potential from what we know, and although we're sad that we haven't made the progress we want, we know that someday he will leave through that door better," (Y/N) smiled nostalgically.
"I just need to ask you something," the brunette confessed. "Could you not tell Jaehyun that I've paid?" she questioned.
"I don't know if it's easy to lie to someone like Jaehyun," the nurse laughed. "But since it's something good you've done... I'll try," the nurse walked to the desk with (Y/N) behind her. "(Y/N)?" She called and paid attention. "I know there may be many things about Jaehyun... but he's a good guy... beneath all that facade; he really has something good."
Those words hammered in her head. "Thank you."
_____________________________________________
(Y/N) reviewed the same line of text she had read five times now on some molasses topic. Trying to understand the topic deeply.
The air coming lightly through one of the library windows was enough for her to try to hug herself to take warmth, read a bit from the physics books on the table, and impatiently move her leg.
She didn't know at what exact moment a tall figure stood in front of her, but what she did know was that that person didn't seem very happy.
"Why did you do it?" Jaehyun let out while looking directly at her.
"I don't know what you're talking about," (Y/N) replied while looking at her book attentively.
"I know you know. I thought I told you I don't need your money," Jaehyun repeated with annoyance.
"I still don't know what you're talking about," the girl stopped seeing her book and changed her gaze to the boy.
"Don't play with me," the boy exclaimed exasperatedly. "Why did I went to the center today and they told me Winwin's treatment has been paid for the next six months?"
The girl shrugged. "It could have been your boss."
"My boss doesn't give a shit about Winwin!" Exclaimed the boy. "I told you I didn't need your money, I was clear, I don't want to owe anything to anyone from Kwangya."
"You don't need to pay me back," the girl assured, standing up in front of Jaehyun. "With the money you'll save from that, you'll be able to sell less."
"It seems you don't understand a fucking thing!" Jaehyun raised your arms with annoyance. "Paying or not paying for Sicheng's treatment, it doesn't change the fact that I sell drugs!" The boy explained regardless of where they were; they were lucky the library wasn't being occupied by other people.
"Everyone starts somewhere!" the girl attacked. "I just wanted to take a weight off your shoulders."
Jaehyun scoffed and looked at her with a sarcastic smile.
"Why? I don't need your pity! If you hadn't accompanied me yesterday, you'd still be thinking Winwin had moved to China! You didn't give a fucking damn even when he was your classmate!"
(Y/N) started gathering her things and putting them in her backpack.
"Saying thank you would have been enough, Jaehyun!" the girl remarked. "I know you can do better with your life," she murmured as she turned to look at him.
Jaehyun's blood was boiling; he hated when people interfered in his life, as if he didn't already have enough to deal with.
"You don't know anything about me! You said it yourself; we're not even friends," he retorted.
"And what if I want to get to know you better?" the girl exclaimed without thinking. They both fell silent, staring into each other's eyes. (Y/N) didn't even want to say those words, but she did.
She couldn't deny that Jung Jaehyun was intriguing. She didn't know why. She didn't know why she had been avoiding him for weeks, but since that night at Neo Zone, when they had talked about the deal, she knew it would be difficult to shake him off, and when she had... something inside her wanted them to meet again. Why are things so difficult? They are two different people from different backgrounds; why would she suddenly be interested in him? Was it because she saw him vulnerable the day before? Or was it because she believed there was something good in him, just like the nurse had said?
She must be crazy to think like that.
"You really don't want to do it," Jaehyun said with a bit more calmness.
"I know you can get out out of that hole, Jaehyun."
"Winwin's parents tried, and look how that ended up!" he exclaimed. "There's no way out in Neo Zone, get that through your head," he explained. "There's nothing good about me. I don't even know why you think so, just because yesterday you saw something different or because I drove you home a couple of times, doesn't mean you know everything about me!"
"Stop acting like a fucking jerk."
"Like a jerk? This is reality! Your act of charity isn't going to change my life. I was born a dealer, and that's how my life will end!"
"I really believe there's something good in you."
"Well, keep believing it."
"If you ever feel grateful, you know where to find me," the girl said, gathering her things and walking out of the library.
Jaehyun cursed under his breath and shook his hands in frustration. In just a few days, the girl had managed to push his buttons faster than anyone else from Neo Zone.
But when he saw her walk out the door, why did he feel regret for lashing out at her?
_______________________________________________
The week had been slow this time. (Y/N) and Jaehyun had been avoiding each other like the plague, not even looking at each other when they crossed paths in the hallway. For the girl, it seemed like childish behavior, especially coming from Jaehyun and his usual façade; now he seemed nothing more than someone throwing a tantrum after she only wanted to help him.
But she still thought she really wanted to get to know him better.
What was behind his façade? What was it that made him who he was? Not the boy from Neo Zone, not the dealer everyone knew... who was Jeong Jaehyun really?
That question had been on her mind for weeks, and it disappointed her a bit to know that she might never know the answers to those doubts she had about the boy.
Today was warm compared to the weather last week. The sun was shining brightly, and luckily for (Y/N), her mother had decided to return her car. So her day had started off on the right foot, and hoping for a good day, she took the opportunity to stop by her favorite coffee shop in Kwangya. Ordering her usual vanilla latte and just before it was time to pay, a thought invaded her mind, and after debating it internally, she decided to follow her thoughts.
An hour and a half later, when she was the last one to leave her physics class, someone blocked her path at the classroom door. Holding her book to her chest, after the unexpected startle, she looked ahead to find no one but Jaehyun. Who stood silently in front of her, with the same leather jacket he used to wear, the same combination of marijuana and vanilla scent, and with the same enchanting eyes, that she had just noticed.
She was in dangerous territory.
And she knew it.
"I need to go to my next class, Jaehyun," the girl said shortly.
For a few seconds, the boy in front of her didn't say anything, he just watched her, until he sighed and slowly said, "Thank you."
Short and to the point, he didn't say anything else, and that was enough to make (Y/N)'s heart flutter in a thousand ways.
"For the coffee," the boy finished. "And for the notes."
"I did my part, I told you I would help you," said (Y/N) as she fiddled with her fingers.
"I thought you wouldn't after the last time we met," Jaehyun confessed.
"I'm sticking to that."
A small silence ensued. Two people face to face. With thousands of doubts between them and things to resolve. What had drawn them together? How was it that the universe managed to put two completely different people in the same place?
"Did you mean it?" Jaehyun asked, and when he noticed that (Y/N) didn't understand what he meant, he continued. "About wanting to get to know me more."
(Y/N) swallowed hard and looking him in the eyes, nodded.
"I still believe there's something good in you."
"Why?"
"I don't know yet," she replied honestly. "And it's killing me. A while ago, I wouldn't have wanted anything to do with you, not even to cross paths, but now, I don't know what's changed, but every time I try to stay away, it's like something brings me back here," she confessed, leaving Jaehyun speechless, who just watched her, trying to decipher everything she was saying.
It was killing him too.
"Let's go to my car," he said.
"Huh?" she asked, confused.
"You want to know more about me, then get in my car," he said again, this time making his way to the parking lot, with (Y/N) behind him, who didn't say a single word, just followed his lead.
What was he doing?
When they reached the car, Jaehyun opened the passenger door, causing (Y/N) to get in without protesting. Then Jaehyun got into the driver's seat and without further ado, started the engine. She didn't know what was happening or what would happen next, but right now she could only trust Jaehyun.
Even though she didn't know how bad an idea that might be.
A few minutes later, as they had traveled a long distance, (Y/N) noticed they were approaching Neo Zone, and with her eyes wide open, she panicked.
"This is me," Jaehyun said out of nowhere, catching the girl's attention. "See all these streets? This is where I belong. This is what I am," he explained carefully.
(Y/N) looked out the window, a couple of people smoking on the sidewalk, others passing joints, and other silent streets. The houses weren't that big... rather, they looked cramped. Unlike what she was used to, to her lifestyle, this didn't seem like it would be enough for a family.
But what did she know with the privilege she had?
"I grew up here, this is what I know," he commented. "Most people are born and die here, it's something that seems to be already written," he continued as his car slowed down. "Those of us from here have a different perspective on life... people from Kwangya lives for the money... we live to survive, and although it's getting harder and harder, we manage to do it," the car finally stopped, and still looking out the window, (Y/N) saw a small house in front of them. One story, not much to describe or point out, it was small but for some reason, it looked cozy.
(Y/N) changed her gaze to Jaehyun, who was still looking ahead and spoke.
"Is this your house?"
Jaehyun nodded.
(Y/N) smiled softly.
"Would you invite me in?"
______________________________________________
He doesn't know how (Y/N) managed to have an effect on him, but now they were there, inside his little house, (Y/N) carefully examining the walls around them and analyzing every aspect of the small space.
He was grateful there were no one at home.
"It looks cozy," (Y/N) said as she looked at one of the frames hanging on the wall.
"I guess it's not even a third of your house," Jaehyun assured to (Y/N).
“And no matter how many people are there, it always feels lonely," she confessed. "It's like no one leaves anything there, like it's something unimportant. As if it's not a home," she finished.
Jaehyun looked at her gently, and as she looked around, thousands of things went through his mind.
"To be honest with you," the girl spoke. "I see more vibes from Jeno in this house than yours," she said. "Many things here seem related to Jeno... but I don't see many things related to you..." she continued. "It's like you don't even think about staying here for long."
"I don't plan on leaving Neo Zone," Jaehyun asserted, crossing his arms.
"Don't you want a different future?"
"There's no future for me," Jaehyun pointed out. "And if there were, I'd prefer to give it to Jeno. He has much more to live for than I do."
"You also have a life to live. A future to write, you can change what is today, for something better," (Y/N) turned around to face the boy.
"I have no way out," the boy replied. "Do you think this is easy? After seeing my dad die and doing everything my bosses ask me to do no matter what. Taking care of my mom, Jeno, and now Winwin? Huh? Making sure Winwin becomes who he was again and that my brother doesn't end up being a fucking addict are enough reasons for me not to leave here," Jaehyun concluded, getting dangerously close to her, with a few centimeters separating them.
The words echoed in her head strongly.
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
"Don't pity me," Jaehyun said under his breath.
"It's not that. It's just that every time I think about all this and now that I see your place and I don't see anything that seems to belong to you, it makes me think that's what you're looking for, to belong to something and leave here as soon as there's an opportunity,"
Jaehyun looked directly at her, not knowing what to say. And afraid to think that maybe she was right.
Because yes, maybe he wanted to get out of there, along with his mom, Jeno, and Winwin; maybe he wanted to do something with his life that wasn't illegal, but what was the point of thinking about it when he knew he wouldn't make it? He was afraid to admit that he wanted to be able to change things, to be able to make his family okay, that no shadow from the past would follow them, that they would have a place where they could forge a clean and safe future.
"This has never been about what I want," Jaehyun commented with a future. "Since I was born, everything around me was the gang. After my father's death, I knew what was coming, and I knew I would never be able to get out of it. It doesn’t matter what I want. It matter what my boss wants, he has that kind of power, no one below him has their own decision. The whole life of Neo Zone is ruled by him," he concluded, even closer to her.
(Y/N) looked him in the eyes, her breath uncontrolled. Her chest heaved, and her hands were sweating.
"What do you want, Jaehyun?" she whispered.
The boy paused for a moment and looked at her lips.
"Now?" he asked, and she nodded. "Would it be unrealistic to say that I want to kiss you?"
"How realistic would it be to say that I want you to do it?
She didn't even finish the question because Jaehyun's lips collided firmly with hers. The boy's long hands slid through (Y/N)'s soft hair, her hair smelling of lavender shampoo. He gently covered her cheek with one of his rough hands, and she melted into the touch.
It wasn't a hurried kiss, as (Y/N) thought it would be; actually, Jaehyun was taking the time to savor every passing second. As if this moment would disappear at any minute and he wanted to hold onto it.
Was he looking for something to belong to?
His hand moved from her cheek to her waist, and she took the opportunity to press her body against his and release a moan of pleasure. As if she felt complete leaning against Jaehyun's warmth.
As if it was something they both longed for for a long time.
And even though she wanted to continue with the act, they were severely interrupted when a car horn sounded incessantly outside the house, causing them to separate with tremendous confusion. (Y/N)'s red cheeks were enough to make Jaehyun's heart race, but when he heard another horn, he took her hand and they walked outside in hurry.
And then, there was Jeno, being thrown out of the back of a car, blood streaming from a cut on his eyebrow, bruises scattered all over his body, and falling firmly to the ground after being thrown.
"I want this to be the last time your brother sets foot in our zone. Next time it won't be him we throw," the familiar voice of a boy from the opposing gang spoke up. Chris. Who was with the window down and smiling maliciously. "Neither will it be you, Jung. It will be the girl who will end up like this,"
Jaehyun moved abruptly from his place to try to reach the car, but it left as fast as it could, (Y/N) shocked to hear those words, didn't do anything more than approach Jeno to help him up. Then Jaehyun cursed under his breath and looked into the distance at the girl and her brother together.
And his chest tightened as he realized that now, she too had been involved.
And he believed there was no turning back, because she was right... Jaehyun wanted to belong to something.
But how selfish would it be to belong to (Y/N)?
a/n: well now you know what happened to Winwin TT. Once again I’m sorry if this took too long I promise I’ll try to update sooner this time!
taglist is open! if you want to be added just lemme know;)
taglist: @spicyryujin @kriizztin @daegalismybiasinnct @peachfulnight @gojoscumslut @bluedbliss @dear-97 @girlwholoveslpreppyattire @hana-off-icial @cigarettesafterjae
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mxstellatayte · 3 months
Text
fuck me up, florida.
warnings: angst for the majority of it, sex at the end though, legal use of alcohol (reader and logan are both 23,) mentions of gunshot wounds, minor character death, based on a taylor swift song, childhood (middle/high school) friends to lovers, idiots in love, "you came" "you called," reader is half mexican (mom's side), slightly inaccurate bc i know carola wasn't at the miami gp but just go with it for the plot, reader's last name is rodriguez,
author's note: y'all i apologize if any of the spanish grammar is a little weird. my spanish is rusty, pls don't hate me for it
logan sargeant x female reader
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i need to forget so
tuesday, april 30th.
you scan your ticket, the screen displaying your name and seat number. 12A. at least it'll be easy to sleep, you think.
after shoving your suitcase above your seat, you shuffle your way to the window and buckle yourself in.
are you really doing this? flying a couple thousand miles to visit your childhood best friend who, up until recently, had you convinced that his newfound fame that he'd gathered by announcing his enrollment in the williams driver's academy made him too good for you.
the only thing that made you think otherwise was the instagram dm he'd sent you five weeks prior, asking if you'd be able to make it to the miami grand prix. instead of a simple yes or no, you responded with the heaviest three words you've ever seen in order.
can we call?
logan picked up on the second ring.
"hey."
"hey."
"how's texas?"
you smile. "hot. sunny. flat. beachless."
"so... it's good?" you hate that you can still picture his facial expressions even after not seeing him for years except for on tv.
"'s okay, but it's not home, y'know?"
"definitely. it doesn't matter how much i decorate my place in england, it's never florida."
"nothing besides florida is ever florida," you sigh, looking out the window of your apartment. "how's the season been?" you don't exactly know why you're asking. you know exactly how his season's gone. you keep every single detail of every single race weekend meticulously catalogued in a journal that you take everywhere with you. no matter what, you've stayed up late or woken up early to watch every race, as if your hopeful energy would make its way across the world to him in time.
"honestly? it's been pretty shit. the car handles really badly and wasn't really even ready for the first few hours of testing in bahrain. i can't get it to perform and maybe that's just because i haven't linked with the car yet, but it still really sucks."
you sigh, hoping logan can't tell how disappointed you are with his team and engineers. "you need a better team, lo."
"i know." there's silence between you for a few moments, and every second that passes makes it grow heavier on your chest. "will you come to miami?"
there it is. the reason you called him.
"i don't know, lo. don't get me wrong, i'd love to, but it's really short notice and i don't know if i could afford the trip. i might be able to make it to austin, but i'll need the time to save the money for the trip."
"i'll fly you out," logan immediately says, his tone almost desperate. longing. "i'll pay for your flight, your hotel, everything. please?"
that last word hit you like a punch in the gut. you only had one more reason to not go and you weren't about to tell him that reason. it was a shitty excuse anyways.
you're not about to tell him that the reason you moved to texas was to give him the space he needed to be able to succeed in his career and for you to succeed in yours.
take me to florida
you're jolted awake by the force of the plane landing, if you can call the awkward limbo you were stuck in sleep. immediately, your stomach twists with anxiety. logan had offered to pick you up from the airport, but you refused.
"i'll just take an uber," you'd said. "i'm gonna want to relax a bit after the flight, y'know?"
his only trade-off? you met him for dinner. simple enough, right?
in theory.
now, standing in front of the full-length mirror in your hotel room, you debate between a floral sundress and a pair of denim shorts, a tank top, and a white button-up t-shirt with a colorful inkblot pattern.
you decide on the sundress.
fifteen minutes later, you're pushing earrings through your piercings, silver abstract shapes you'd bought on a trip to europe with your mother. you have to leave, but the situation you're in sucks. your hair won't sit right on your head, either being too frizzy from the humidity or losing any and all volume, and your makeup just doesn't seem like it'll last in the miami heat.
fuck it.
who are you dressing for, anyways?
logan's seen you at your absolute worst. he was the only one you let yourself cry in front of after your father died. he was the one that held you for what seemed like hours while you sobbed into his chest and he told you that none of it was your fault- that you never could have known that, when you hugged him before he left for the police station, told him you loved him, and slipped a note into his lunch box, the next time you would see him, he would be laying in a casket. he was the only one that could make you smile in the weeks following his funeral, dropping his entire schedule if you simply sent him a text that said "can you come over?"
the restaurant logan found isn't too far from your hotel, so you ultimately decide to walk. your walk is over before you're able to process that it even started and you're taking out your earbuds and putting them in your bag, taking out your phone instead to text logan.
i'm here.
i've got some regrets
were you always this breathtakingly beautiful?
logan's phone buzzes in his front pocket, but he knows it's you texting him. he doesn't even bother taking it out of his pocket before standing up from his seat at the bar and walking over to you, and when you see him, your smile almost makes his heart melt.
"hey," he says, and he hopes his voice doesn't waver from how nervous he is.
"hey. i missed you," you respond, dodging the hand he holds out and going in for a hug. "i've known you since middle school, logan, i'm not shaking your hand."
your arms around him and your body pressed against his almost makes logan short circuit. thankfully, he's able to regain control of his brain and hug you back, hopefully before you realize he isn't hugging you back.
when you pull back, the hug seeming way too brief for logan's preference, you're looking up and smiling with a sparkle in your eyes that makes him regret not making enough time for you. "thanks for bringing me out here."
"thanks for coming. do you want a drink?"
"sure. do you have a table yet?"
"i was waiting for you."
"in that case, lead the way." you gesture towards the restaurant, and logan shows you to a booth in the corner. soon enough, a waiter comes over to you and sets down two glasses of water and two menus.
"welcome in, y'all. do we need a bit of time to look at the menu or do we know what we want to get started?" his southern drawl is thick, and it reminds you of texas. but you're in florida now.
"i think we'll look at the menu for a minute, thanks," logan says, and the waiter nods and walks away. as you open the menu and begin looking, logan points out something you might like and you do the same for him. conversation begins to flow freely between you, and it reminds you of the times in high school when you would go out with friends.
eventually, you decide on a plate of nachos and logan gets a plate of wings. as you wait for your food, you catch up on everything: your move to texas, logan's racing career, your work volunteering with the austin philharmonic, his homesickness from living in england, and everything in between. you crack stupid jokes, share bites of food, and steal sips of each other's drinks.
it's like old times.
i'll bury them in florida
on wednesday, you and logan drive up to visit your father's headstone. it's difficult. it's only the third time you've visited him since he was buried three years ago. the first time you visited him was a year after he died. even a year later, you still carried so much anger and hatred towards the doctors and nurses that were operating on him, trying desperately to save his life after two bullets hit him- one in his leg, one in his torso.
he died on the table.
the second time was just a few months after, and you were still wearing your cap, gown, and stole from your graduation ceremony. by then, you had been able to forgive the doctors and had graduated in the top 10% of your class. four years of hell had finally rewarded you with a degree in instrumental performance and an internship at the south florida symphony orchestra.
now, the third time, you have a picnic blanket and lunch packed into the backseat of logan's car, the windows are rolled down, and your favorite playlist is shuffled on the aux. it's a beautiful day, too; it isn't too hot (even with the humidity,) there's a gentle breeze in the air, and clouds occasionally cover the sun. when logan pulls into the parking lot of the cemetery and you sling your tote bag full of food over your shoulder, your hands start shaking.
of course, logan notices.
his hand slides into your own, and you look up at him. his eyes meet yours and you smile. "thank you for coming with me," you say.
"of course. i didn't want you to have to do this alone."
you look back at the gate into the cemetery, the black bars menacingly sleek and very, very terrifying. you chew your lower lip in anxiety. "i don't know if i can do it, logan."
"i'm here with you. i know you. you're strong. you aren't the kind of person to let a gate scare you." you laugh lightly, looking down at the ground. the gravel of the parking lot, your scuffed, beat-up high top purple converse, and logan's nike dunks make up what you have to describe as a perfect picture. your phone is in your free hand before you know it, and you're lining up the shot. "still into photography, huh?"
"yep. i have some cameras in my suitcase at the hotel." when you pocket your phone and look back up at him, logan's heart melts. the shine in your eyes and the passion in your smile is enough to soften anyone's heart, but for him, as someone who's known you for years and has been there for you through thick and thin, it touches him in such a special way. "i'm hoping to get some good photos of the races. but enough delaying. let's go visit my dad."
the creak of the gates opening makes your ears bleed, and you laugh at how logan is making the exact same face as you in reaction to such a shrill sound. despite only having visited his headstone twice before, you remember exactly where in the cemetery it is and are able to find it within five minutes.
"hi, dad," you begin, your voice already wavering just the slightest and tears beginning to well in your eyes. logan's hand squeezes yours, though, and you're reminded that he's right there. he always will be. you take a deep breath and continue. "i miss you. we all do. i know i haven't visited you in a while, and i'm sorry about that. i really do have to come stop by every now and then. i moved to austin and have a volunteering gig with the austin philharmonic at almost every show and i have a job at a company that helps students with learning disabilities learn instruments. it's really fun." you pause to wipe the tears off of your cheeks, your nose beginning to drip. "sam is in his junior year of college, and he's majoring in engineering. he flew the coop, but he still comes home for the summers. he, uh, he actually got in to c.u. boulder, like he always talked about. that kid was always thinking about college, even in middle school.
"i'm actually here with logan, too, if you hadn't noticed. do you, uh, do you want to fill him in on what's going on with you, or should i keep going?"
"whatever you prefer."
"okay, i'm going to keep talking, because i think if i don't, i'm going to completely break down. logan finally signed with williams to drive on their formula 1 team last year, like i always said he would. i'm really proud of him and really regret not telling him that more, and now that i'm saying it out loud i'm promising both you and him that i'll tell him that more often. the race this weekend is actually here, in florida. miami, specifically. it's always a celebrity shit show that no one really wants to see, but it's the main opportunity for the celebrity sponsors to actually go to a race.
"what else has been going on? oh, mom is still a therapist. i can't tell you much about that because of hipaa, but she always comes home saying that she's glad that she could help someone. i'm gonna have dinner with her tomorrow night, and then i'm going back into miami to watch logan's practice sessions."
you pause your rambling, thinking about what there is to say next, but your thought is interrupted by your stomach grumbling. loud. you and logan laugh just as loudly, the sound echoing through the grass field and stone gravesites. "oh, yeah, that's another thing. we brought lunch. i also got you pink tulips, because i know they're your favorite." you delicately rest the bouquet on your father's headstone as you sit down, then pull out the different plastic containers filled with food you'd stolen from the williams hospitality. "you'd be proud of me, dad. i smuggled this entire picnic out of the wiliams motorhome without a hiccup. robin hood style."
logan laughs, and you turn to him. he's mirrored your position, sitting cross-legged on the grass. "apple?"
"nah, i'm gonna start with my sandwich. i did grab you some of the salt and vinegar chips i know you like."
the look logan gives you can only be described as pure adoration. "you," he says, pointing a finger at you in an incredibly sassy manner, "are an absolute goddess."
"i know," you respond cheekily, tossing some hair over your shoulder.
the banter between the two of you continues through your picnic, laughter and smiles erasing the dried tracks of tears on your cheeks and on logan's. you're almost able to forget where you are.
tell me i'm despicable
almost two hours later, the two of you are laying in a nearby park underneath a tree, peacefully observing the clouds that pass overhead and talking even more about any topic that comes to your mind. the question that's been gnawing at you since your plane landed in miami eventually bubbles to the surface, and it tumbles past your lips before you can stop it.
"did you ever wonder why i moved to texas?" you look to your left where logan rests, but he keeps looking up at the sky. you mirror him.
"i always assumed it was just because you needed a change of scenery. after everything that happened and your music career taking off, it would make sense that you would relocate to somewhere better suited for you."
"that's the thing, though. if i'm being entirely honest with you, lo, i hate texas. i hate the whole state. i hate how hot it is all the time without even being humid, i hate not being able to go to the beach. i hate how dry it is. i hate how flat it is. i hate the monotony of it. i hate not being here."
logan hesitates for a moment before speaking, and it's the longest moment you've ever experienced. "why did you move to austin, then?"
when he looks over at you, you're chewing your lower lip. it's a nervous tic, logan's noticed. he's not even sure if you know you do it. "honestly? i thought you moved on from our friendship. i thought everything with f1 suddenly got so big and important and famous that maybe i wasn't... enough? i thought that being a police officer's daughter from the same town as you that was studying to teach people how to understand and play music maybe just wasn't cool enough to be friends with a world-renowned formula 1 driver."
logan's heart almost shatters when he hears the weakness in your voice. you sound so broken and so alone. he knew that, when you lost your father, you isolated yourself from a lot of people, even your best friend from high school and through your first year of college. he was the only person outside of your immediate family that you spent a decent amount of time with, but when he was admitted to the driver's academy he had to move to england. he abandoned you.
"i didn't. i never forgot about you. sometimes i still look through the photos we have together because i miss you that much."
you sit up, tears pricking your eyes for the second time that day. "really?"
"yeah. maybe once a week?"
when you look down at logan, you're suddenly starstruck. you can't help but notice all of his little features that you wouldn't see if you didn't know to look for them. his freckles that are so light you'd have to squint to see them if you didn't know them like the back of your hand. the mole on his chin that he'd always been self-conscious about but you've always seen it as beautiful. the lines from where his eyes crinkle when he smiles. the annoyingly perfect flop of his hair that he's styled almost the exact same way since you started high school together. an urge you haven't felt in years suddenly bubbles, white-hot in the pit of your stomach, and it's boiling over before you can stop it. your eyes are closed and your lips are on his. finally. after years of wanting, of stares that lasted just a bit too long to be just friendly, of flushed faces and nervous excuses, you're finally kissing him.
but he's not kissing you back.
you pull back immediately, panicked that you read something wrong. you turn away, hiding your face in your hands out of shame. "shit, logan, i'm so sorry. i thought-"
"kiss me again." logan sits up, and when you turn around, the look he's giving you can only be described as completely and entirely fucked. you don't question his statement, just lean forward, placing your lips on his, and letting yourself melt. he moans softly into the kiss, his right arm wrapping around your waist and pulling you impossibly closer. when you pull away and open your eyes, your breath catches in your throat. he looks beautiful. his eyes remain closed, but when they flutter open, you see colors in them that you've never seen before. sure, you've always seen the darker rim of blue that outlines his irises, but now that you're so close to him, you can see the flecks of green and grey in them. it's the most stunning thing you've ever seen.
eventually, you break the silence between the two of you. "i've wanted to kiss you for so long," you whisper, so quiet you're not sure logan heard it.
but he did.
"me, too," he says, and after a beat of silence between you two, you both burst out laughing. the laugh he hears from you is the pure, bright laugh that logan's missed so dearly, the laugh that you only really let him hear. the laugh that has tears in your eyes and makes you snort because you're laughing so hard you can't even breathe properly.
eventually, when you're able to calm down, your head resting on logan's shoulder, your hand holding his, you're able to process what just happened. you just hope logan is processing it, too.
"we just kissed."
"yes. we did."
"how long have you held out on me?"
"since christmas of sophomore year. when you made me the chevron bracelet with my favorite colors."
you laugh, then lift your head to look at him. "i fell for you in october of that year. when you convinced your mom to drive two and a half hours for the marching band state finals. just so you could be there with me."
"god, we're idiots," logan laughs. you can't help but lean forward and press another kiss to his lips, lingering there and just breathing him in.
existing.
say it's unforgivable
the next two days fly by. thursday, you spend the day with your mother. she asks all sorts of questions as if she doesn't know the answers, and you answer each one with a smile on your face. when she asks about logan, you smile sheepishly. she figures out what the smile means.
"took you two long enough."
normally you'd still be in bed at 9:30 am on a friday, but today, you walk into the miami paddock clutching logan's hand for dear life. your neon green pass hangs from your neck, a white williams cap atop your head. you can't help but feel out of place, but someone calls logan's name and you both turn. your stomach drops when you see who's called his name. his hair is styled similarly to logan's, and he sports a papaya polo.
you'd know him anywhere. it's oscar piastri.
you're standing there a bit awkwardly as logan greets his friend, but your heart stops when oscar turns to you. "oscar, this is my girlfriend." he introduces you by your name to the mclaren driver and you wipe your hands on your denim shorts before shaking his hand firmly, exchanging "nice to meet you"s. the three of you chat for a few minutes before oscar is summoned by his pr manager.
"girlfriend, huh?" you look up at logan with a smile on your face, lacing his fingers with yours.
"i didn't mean to overstep, but i kind of assumed that's what this is now. is it?" he looks a bit nervous asking that, and if you thought your love for him couldn't grow any more, you thought wrong.
"that's absolutely what we are, lo. you're my boyfriend. i'm your girlfriend." you can tell just how hard logan's trying to not let the smile on his face show just how happy he is to hear you say that, and you stand on your tiptoes to press a kiss to his lips briefly. "you have a prep meeting to get to, don't you?"
"i do. come with me, though. i need to introduce you to alex and lily. she can show you around."
"sounds like a plan. i need to learn how to do all of..." you gesture around you, the white tents and media carts all seeming suddenly too intimidating. "...this."
logan laughs, placing a hand on the small of your back to guide you towards the williams hospitality. when you're next to him, though, despite the cameras around you and your proximity to some of the world's biggest stars, you feel safe and protected.
after meeting logan's teammate and the thai driver's girlfriend, who you quickly realize is one of the sweetest people you've ever had the pleasure of meeting, you're shown around the williams hospitality and, eventually, the paddock. lily introduces you to the other drivers' wives and girlfriends that have made it to the weekend, and when you hear a certain last name, your ears perk up.
"martinez? is she latina?"
"yeah," kika, pierre's girlfriend, says. "she's checo's wife. i'm pretty sure she's in the red bull hospitality right now, though."
"ah, speak of the devil," lily says. you see carola walking up to the five of you, alexandra ("please, honey, call me alex," she'd said, bringing you in for a kiss on your cheek,) having walked away to get a drink and escape into the sweet air conditioning. "carola, there's a new couple on the paddock."
"you're kidding," the latina answers, her accent apparent. "who?"
"logan found himself a girlfriend. allow me to introduce her." lily turns to you and introduces you by your full name, last name and all. it seems that carola has a similar reaction to your last name as you did to hers, and her head tilts to the side.
"ya no eres la única mexicana aquí," you say, and her eyebrows raise. (you aren't the only mexican here anymore.)
"hablas español, también?" (you speak spanish, too?) when you nod, her smile brightens. "hay, chica, creo que nosotras dos nos vamos a llevar muy bien." (oh, girl, i think we're going to get along very well.)
on saturday, you find yourself back in the williams motorhome, except this time, you wear a second badge, the neon green lanyard reading grid access in bold black lettering. like the day before, you clutch logan's hand for your own comfort until, much to your dismay, he's summoned for driver duties. you place a quick kiss on his cheek, and when you pull back, you aren't sure if the flush on his cheeks is from the affection or the miami heat. probably both.
"in case i don't see you before sprint. for luck."
"oh, you'll be in the garage. that's what this pass is for," logan says, holding your second badge in front of your face. "lily will show you where to go. i'll take a kiss anyways, though." you smile, stand on your toes, and kiss him, pulling back before he can wrap an arm around your waist. (that was a trick he very much enjoyed, as you'd learned the night before. there was something in him that needed you as close to him as possible, and it covered every nerve ending in your body in liquid fire.)
"off you go. you need to get race ready. i'll see you before you go out on the grid. don't worry." you gently shove him away with a smile, and you'd stare at him longer if your ankles weren't suddenly being attacked. you look down and squeal. "hi, leo! did your dad let you run free?" you squat down and scratch the mini daschund behind his disproportionally large ears, and he barks excitedly.
someone curses in french to your right, and you look up from the little golden ball of energy to see none other than charles leclerc frantically searching around. leo barks again, and the monégasque whips around, then locks eyes on you first, then his dog.
"merde, leo. you have too much energy for it being this early in the morning," he laughs as he walks over to you.
"i apologize, it appears i've unintentionally kidnapped your dog." you stand, and leo jumps at your calves again.
"ah, no harm, no foul," charles replies, picking up his dog and holding him close to his chest. "i will say, though, you look strangely familiar. have we met? my name is charles."
"we have not." you extend your hand and offer your name, and, when charles' eyebrows furrow and his head tilts in confusion, you realize that means nothing to him. "i'm logan's girlfriend."
"ah! yes, of course! he has a photo of the two of you at your high school graduation in his wallet. that's where i knew you from. well, it's nice to meet you!" that was news to you. logan has a picture of you in his wallet? either way, you just casually met one of the most famous people in the world like it was a standard tuesday.
if this is what i signed up for by being logan's girlfriend, then it is absolutely wild.
you're able to catch another good luck kiss with logan as he's almost fully suited up, and fuck, does he look good. his fireproof suit hangs low on his hips, the arms tied together in front of him. dark blue is a good color on him, and his facial hair is grown out in just the slightest. you can't lie, he looks hot as hell.
you cross your legs in an attempt to curb the heat that creeps down your tummy and between them. it doesn't work.
you amend it that night in logan's hotel room following his p10 in the sprint.
on sunday, you try to avoid thinking about the night before as you follow the same routine as the two days before- arriving early in the day, checking in at the williams motorhome, and then killing time until the driver's parade at 2:00 PM. you spend time with your new group of friends, spending the three remaining hours before the parade in the paddock club. rebecca, carlos' girlfriend, snickers at your shocked face when you see some of your idols and favorite celebrities casually walking around, gladly taking some photos for you as you're practically buzzing with excitement.
after the driver's parade, it's a whirlwind. you're swept back into the williams garage and find logan's driver's room relatively easily thanks to the help of some of the engineers and mechanics, but one of them stops you before you can venture too far into the depths of the hallways.
"could you tell him we have the pre-race strategy meeting in twenty minutes?"
"yeah, for sure." as you approach logan's door, you have to bite down on your lower lip to stifle the grin that wants to split your face. you knock on his door, and when he opens it, you know something's wrong. "lo, are you okay?" his eyes are red and his hand shakes on the doorknob. instead of a verbal response, he just opens the door a bit further to let you in, and, as soon as it shuts behind you, he sobs, and your heart shatters.
"i'm so scared. i'm so scared that something's going to happen and i'm going to let all of these people down and-" you gather him into your arms and he cries into the crook of your neck, your williams crewneck shirt now damp with his tears. you couldn't care less.
"you're going to do amazing, logie. i know you will." with your arms wrapped around him, it's almost like a weighted blanket of safety has encompassed him, and his sobs slow, his breaths growing deeper and more even. you continue murmuring words of confidence into his shoulder, and not a single word you say is empty.
"hey. look at me." you lean back and gently cup his cheek with your right palm, and when his eyes meet yours, you know that he needed to cry that one out. "do you feel a little bit better?" logan nods, tilting his head ever so slightly to kiss your palm, his own hand coming up to rest over yours. it's a cute, sappy, stupidly romantic moment that you from three weeks ago would've probably thought was the grossest thing known to mankind, but you can't help but bask in the moment. "is there anything i can do to help you feel better right now?" your voice is a soothing balm over logan's agitated nerves, and he slowly untangles himself from you and guides you over to the couch that's against the back wall, where he sits down and you curl up to his left side.
"can you just... talk? about anything?"
"are you seriously asking if me, the person with the most rampant adhd you've ever met, can talk about something? yes, logan, i absolutely can. what to talk about, though?"
as you talk, deciding to info dump about your favorite classical music piece, logan can't help but watch it unfold. he doesn't know jack shit about music theory, but listening to you ramble about something you're passionate about brings him so much peace. you're disturbed about fifteen minutes later by a knock at the door, promptly followed by a disembodied voice telling logan that it was time for the strategy meeting.
"aw, shit," he says, leaning his head back and rubbing at his eyes. "i have that to go to now."
"yeah, sorry. i was supposed to tell you about that but we had a bigger problem on our hands." your voice is sheepish now that your info dump has been cut short, but logan leans over to you and kisses you, soft and slow, just like the first time he kissed you properly in the park. when he pulls away, he looks so much calmer than he was twenty minutes before. "is there anything else i can do?"
"go have some fun in the paddock. and please drink some water." you roll your eyes and stand, bringing him in for another hug before you slip out of the door.
almost two hours later, you're back in the williams garage with a guest headset over your ears. your stomach twists with nerves as the national anthem concludes. lily's hand is clasped with yours.
"the first lap is the worst. after that, you lose a lot of the anxiety," she assures you, noticing how you chew your lower lip.
"thanks." you pause for a moment, contemplating another question. "does it ever get easier? seeing how they go out there and drive like absolute maniacs for fun?"
"it does. it took me a couple of months, but after alex showed me all of the safety features in the car and in his fireproofs, it definitely helped."
it's the moment you've been dreading.
one red light.
two.
three.
four.
five.
and then none.
the engines roar and the race has begun. lily didn't lie to you- the first lap is excruciatingly long, but when everyone's completed their first loop around the circuit, you let yourself breathe. your eyes are trained on the screen above you, and the laps are flying by so quickly that you barely process that the race is nearly halfway over.
but then logan's car is in the wall. fuck.
as you watch the replay of his crash, you can feel white-hot rage burning in your body. after the race stewards only declare a ten-second penalty and two super license points, though, you're fuming. "two penalty points and a ten-second penalty? magnussen caused logan's race to end, and they just let him go? they just forgive him and move on? how can he get away with that? this is bullshit!"
what a crash, what a rush
the first person logan looks for when he walks back into the williams garage, his visor still low over his eyes in shame, is you. when you see him walking towards the room where you and lily watch the race, you tear the headset off of your ears and run to him. the feeling of his arms wrapping around your shoulders and hearing his heartbeat even through your musician's earplugs soothes your agitated nerves. he's okay. he's alive. he isn't hurt. "thank fuck you're okay," you say, even though he definitely can't hear you through his helmet and over the roar of passing engines. when you pull away, you press a kiss to his knuckles and hope he understands how much love you're trying to convey through such a small gesture.
fuck me up, florida!
one of logan's best friends on the grid is oscar. oscar's teammate got his maiden win after almost five years of waiting in miami.
like any sensible person, you celebrate with him.
you have no idea what the name of the club is, much less how many drinks you've had so far, but what you do know is that lando has commandeered the dj station and logan is pressed against your back, his hands resting on your hips. the air is hot and thick, your heartbeat pounds in your head. the opening notes of bad bunny's tití me preguntó begin playing through the massive speakers, and you shoot a glare up to lando that he doesn't see, his focus instead on the equipment in front of him. when the bass hits, though, you let all apprehensiveness go and your genetics take the reins. your hips sway and swing to the beat, your hands wander up and down your torso, and logan simply follows your lead. it takes you a moment to realize that, if you want to get a rise out of him, you're going to have to spin around and face him.
with your hips swaying against his and how unbearably beautiful you look in the dim light, your skin glowing with sweat and your hair up in a high ponytail, logan can't help but lean down and kiss you when you finally turn around. you reciprocate gladly, your right leg slotting between both of his, and...
oh.
oh.
he's hard.
you pull away slightly, barely an inch between your lips. "slow your roll there, tiger."
"i don't want to." fire zips down your spine at the sound of his voice, low and breathy and so, so desperate. "need to fuck you."
"should we get outta here, then?"
"i thought you'd never ask." you smile and kiss him quickly, then take his hand and weave your way through the crowded dance floor. as the miami night air hits your face, you immediately feel cooler. you sigh, taking a moment to breathe and regulate your heart rate and body temperature, but you can't breathe for that long before logan wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you back against him and kissing your neck. you laugh, running your hands along his forearms.
"logan, not here. the hotel is two blocks away."
"i can't help it, baby, you just look so pretty," he hums, kissing the back of your neck once more before pulling away and stepping around to face you. "you look so pretty, and you're mine."
his possessiveness of you makes more heat zip down your spine, and you almost drool at how he's looking at you. his eyes, normally a beautiful mix between the blues of the sky and sea, ar"e almost completely dark, only a small sliver of his irises remaining, and the muscles in his jaw tick. "hotel. now."
by the time you reach the door to logan's hotel room, you're both out of breath from how hard he kissed you in the elevator and the arousal and need between your legs won't be stopped unless he replaces it. you stumble through the door and try to kiss logan again, matching the vigor he showed you in the elevator, but he stops you. "wanna take my time with you tonight."
"yeah?" you raise an eyebrow and inspect his face. the blinds are open but no lights are on, so all you can see is the side of his face that's illuminated by the lights from the streets of miami. it's an unusually beautiful sight.
"yeah. nothing about what i'm about to do to you is going to be fast. i'm gonna make you feel good tonight. how's that sound?"
"that sounds amazing, logan." you lean forward and kiss him gently, your lips slotting together as if you were made for each other. who knows, maybe you were. the next five minutes are a blur, but before you know it, you're laying back against the pillows on logan's bed and his face is buried between your thighs, his tongue working magic on your clit. the air in the hotel room is filled with your moans and the sounds of logan devouring you like a man starved, and it's the most beautiful mix of sounds you've ever heard. when he flicks his tongue oh-so-perfectly against your entrance, his nose brushing over your clit, you moan and pull his hair hard, which, in turn, makes him moan against you.
you aren't sure how much time passes or how many orgasms logan pulls from you with just his tongue and his fingers, but when you feel completely and entirely spent, your chest heaving and your hairline sparkling with tiny beads of sweat, you pull logan up to you by his shoulders, and he looks completely and entirely fucked. "need you inside of me," you mumble, wiping at the mix of spit and cum that coats the entire bottom half of his face with your thumbs. as if on instinct, you bring your hands to your mouth and lick them clean, and logan groans at the sight. "inside. now."
"as you wish, baby." logan's hands fumble at his boxers, the only item of clothing he was left wearing, and when he finally, finally pushes himself into you, you both moan. your hands scrabble at his shoulders and back, most definitely leaving red marks that will raise later, and his mouth latches onto your neck, biting down and then gently kissing over the red spot.
"nngh, lo-" your brain is short circuiting, logan's cock filling you up so perfectly and absolutely ruining you for any other man ever.
"yeah? you okay, baby?" he pulls back from your neck and scans your face for any sign of discomfort of pain, his sky blue eyes searching your own. the feeling of safety you get from just that one action is almost enough to make you sob from how good you feel because of him, both physically and emotionally.
"feels so good, lo. j'st... move, please."
"you sure? i don't wanna hurt you."
"positive. now please." you reach a hand up and pull him down towards you by the back of his neck, tangling your fingers in his hair and pulling hard. "fuck me properly." without wasting a second, logan reaches a hand down and hooks it under your left thigh, bringing your leg up to rest around his waist, then pulling back and thrusting back in fast. the moan that rips itself from your throat is sinful, and your breath is being punched from your lungs at the downright brutal pace logan's setting. your right leg finds itself locking around his waist, only bringing him infinitely closer, and now, each time he thrusts back into you, your clit bumps against his pelvis. within minutes, you're embarrassingly close to cumming again, and through your garbled mumbling and clawing at his shoulders, he understands, reaching his right hand down to gently press against your clit.
"cum for me, baby, please, need to feel you cum for me just one more time, just let go, i've got you." it's logan's voice that ultimately sends you pummelling over the edge into an orgasm that makes your back arch and your vision fuzz at the edges, and you cum with a cry of his name. his hips slow and his fingers maintain a steady rhythm on your clit, but you can tell it's taking its toll on him. "where- where do you want me to cum?"
"i'm on the pill, lo. inside, baby, please," you whine, and it takes two more thrusts before logan groans, his hips coming to a shuddering halt as he cums inside of you. it's a beautiful sight, too- his eyes scrunched closed and his eyebrows drawn together, his hair a complete mess from where your hands had pulled at it. your hands run through his hair and along his back, and you patiently wait as he comes back to earth.
"hi," he murmurs, opening his eyes and smiling down at you.
"hi," you respond.
no other words need to be said. you know you love him, and he knows he loves you.
and you're both okay with that.
this took me way longer to write than i thought it would, but i absolutely love it! reminder that my asks and requests are open, and i always get excited when i get feedback! take care of urselves lovies <3
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saythenametotheworld · 4 months
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Closer, Faster [1] | cvnn
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Genre: catching feelings; strangers to lovers; smut Synopsis: For good reason, you have forbidden yourself to get emotionally attached to temporary people until Vernon comes walking in and wrecks you to your very core. Pairing: SEVENTEEN Vernon x Reader Warnings: mature themes, explicit sexual content, what's the opposite of slow burn? LONG FIC! Notes: 22k words, song prompt was Closer, Faster by Against the Current. 22k and it's just the first part? Crazy, ik. I feel the need to explain that the reason I write long fics is because I'm a massive yapper irl
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As you walked down the halls of your university, you could hear the campus buzzing with excitement and vibrant energy. Around you, students were rushing to submit final assignments or hurrying from one place to another, taking care of last-minute tasks on the final day of the semester. Some had disheveled hair and tired eyes, while others looked fresh and ready for the summer season.
Walking back to your dorm, you passed groups of friends snapping photos, capturing memories of the past few months. The campus felt like it was collectively exhaling, finally free from the usual chaos of activities. Your belongings were packed up, and your room was now stripped of the personal touches that made it home.
Your roommate, Adie, sat on the edge of her bed across from yours. “Leaving already?”
“Yeah, my chariot awaits,” you said with a smile, tossing the last of your belongings into your purse. You exhaled, looking around the room and already missing it. “I guess that’s everything, huh?”
“Yep. You’ve scoured every corner of this room for your stuff. I’m sure you didn’t miss anything.”
You extended your hand to her. “It’s been a blast, roomie.”
Adie rolled her eyes and chuckled as she shook your hand. “You talk like we’ll never see each other again. We both know we’ll end up being roommates again next year, right?”
You shrugged and laughed. She wasn’t lying. You had been roommates with her for two years now. After freshman year, you both agreed to always share a dorm room every semester, and that’s exactly what you had been doing. You might be saying goodbye now, but you would see each other again in the fall semester and be roommates then too.
“So long, roomie.”
Adie waved as you exited the room. “So long, roomie.”
“Stay in touch!” you reminded her.
The flight home was quick, just an hour and a half. Sometimes you wondered why home felt so far away when it was barely a two-hour flight from your school. Everything about your city felt familiar yet new. As your taxi drove you closer to home, the familiar scent of the ocean filled the air, and the salty breeze swept through the open windows. The sight of the coastline, with its rolling waves and sandy shores, brought a rush of nostalgia. After many months away, the beach house where you grew up felt like a warm embrace waiting for you.
When the taxi pulled over by the sidewalk, you stepped out and took in the view, removing your sunglasses. The house looked just as you remembered—a picket-fenced house with whitewashed walls, grey roofs, black shutters, and the sound of seagulls calling in the distance.
You walked through the open gate, hauling your luggage as you scanned the garden for any changes in the flowerbeds or landscaping. The honk of a car horn made you glance back at the road just in time to see a Jeep pull over in front of your house.
You smiled, recognizing the tall brunette stepping out of the driver’s seat. With a wave, you beckoned her over and opened your arms to welcome your best friend with a hug.
“Hello, stranger,” Jade greeted, pulling you into a tight embrace. “You’re so late!”
You rolled your eyes. “Unlike you, my education is more demanding and requires every bit of my attention.”
“Sucks to be you, then,” she snickered. “Come on. Your mom and I scheduled a brunch together.”
You scoffed but didn’t need to ask for more details. With her help, you moved your luggage into the house, where your mother greeted you warmly. Over brunch, you talked about school, the journey home, and everything in between. After that, you and Jade climbed up to your room to lounge and chat all morning. In the afternoon, you donned your swimsuits and set umbrellas by the beach, equipped with a book to pass the time and cocktails for an extra bit of fun.
Azure Bay is a picturesque coastal town renowned for its breathtaking beach, attracting locals and tourists alike. The beach itself stretches for miles, with soft, golden sands meeting the crystal-clear waters of the ocean.
During the day, the beach is alive with activity. Families set up colorful umbrellas and picnic blankets, children build intricate sandcastles, and surfers ride the gentle waves. In the evenings, the beach transforms into a serene, romantic getaway. The sky paints a stunning palette of oranges, pinks, and purples as the sun sets over the horizon. Bonfires are a common activity where friends and families gather to toast marshmallows and share stories under the sky. Beachfront bars and cafes are filled with lively music and even livelier tourists.
You never particularly enjoyed the swarm of tourists that descended upon Azure Bay each summer. It wasn't that you disliked them in general; you understood why they were drawn to the town's pristine beaches, charming boardwalk, and the laid-back, coastal vibe that felt like paradise. What irked you were the tourists who tried to flirt with you.
It was always the same story. You'd be walking along the beach, or lounging in a beach bar when some guy would approach you with a confident smile and a cheesy pickup line. They were usually good-looking, and charming in a way that was hard to resist, but you knew better. You have seen too many summer romances that bloomed beautifully only to die out when the season ended.
You disliked the idea of developing a beautiful, intimate connection with someone only to watch them pack up and leave once the summer break was over. The thought of investing your emotions in a fleeting romance, knowing that it had an expiration date, felt pointless.
As much as you tried to avoid it, there were always those moments when a particularly persistent tourist would catch you off guard, like right now as you were sitting on the beach bed reading a book. A tall, tan guy with a surfboard strolled up to you.
"Ooh, looks like you're about to score a European hottie on your first day back," Jade teased, peeking at you over her sunglasses. "Good job, sug."
He introduced himself with a casual "Hey there," and you could see the gleam of interest in his eyes.
"Hi," you smiled back, tilting your head to the side.
"I'm just here to catch some waves," he said, flashing a perfect smile. "But I'd love to catch up with you later, maybe grab a drink?"
You heard Jade scoff and then whistled quietly like she didn't just ridicule the guy. He seemed clueless about it though.
You forced a polite smile, trying to keep your voice neutral. "Thanks, but I'm not really looking to meet anyone right now."
He seemed surprised but didn't push further, thankfully. "Well then, see you around."
He winked at you before jogging back where he came from. As soon as he was out of earshot, you and Jade started laughing.
"What the hell was that?" you chuckled.
Jade took her sunglasses off and smoldered at you. In a deep, manly voice she said, "I'm just here to catch some waves."
You smoldered too, trying your best to replicate the guy's expression and tone. "But I'd love to catch up with you later, grab a drink with me?"
"Oh god! It's always the same old cheesy ass lines!"
The following days were filled with simple, repetitive activities: lounging at home, sunbathing by the beach, reading in peace, and swimming with your mom and Jade. It was a week of mundane routines that you didn’t mind at all, though the same couldn’t be said for Jade.
If there is one thing you both hate and love about your best friend, it is her tendency to come up with crazy ideas when bored. They're fun most of the time, but they often include a side quest for her, which is to set you up with someone.
Four days into the summer break, you were sitting with your back against the headboard of your bed, a book in your hand, listening to Jade complain about being bored.
“There's nothing to do at all!” she groaned, kicking her legs in the air as she scrolled through her phone. “Not one rowdy pool party, or a mixer. Not even a birthday!”
She sat up and huffed. “Has summer always been this boring?”
“No.”
“Right? Not here in Azure Bay! This is like an all-time low.”
You chuckled, adjusting your glasses on the bridge of your nose and not peeling your eyes away from your book. “Relax. Summer break is just starting. I doubt everyone’s back from uni yet.”
“Right. That’s exactly why there’s nothing to do,” she huffed. “Your friends are so boring.”
“They’re your friends too, Jade,” you corrected her, referring to your high school friends from this town.
Jade fell quiet, so you continued reading. Until she suddenly scooted next to you, her eyes lighting up as if she had just had a brilliant idea.
“I have an idea,” she began, smiling brightly. “You’re gonna love this.”
You just shrugged, as if giving her your permission, or support, whichever she might need. She began tapping away on her phone again. When you heard your phone buzz on the bedside table, you put your book down and picked up the phone.
Jade: anyone up for summer break in azure bay?
“That’s your big idea?” you deadpanned, eyeing the chatheads of the people who have read her message in your group chat.
She hummed. “I know. I’m a genius.”
You snorted, scrolling through your phone. “More like impulsive. But go on.”
Jaehyun liked. Adie: Azure Bay? Like your hometown? Jade: yes yes Trina: me! Eunwoo: Me too! Jade: eunwoo, you’re not invited Eunwoo: ???
You scowled. “You can’t not invite Eunwoo. He's already set to come here with your Jaehyun next week, remember?”
“Ah, right, he is,” Jade replied, rolling her eyes.
Jade: jk. But if you hog y/n all to yourself, istg!!! Eunwoo: not my fault she likes me better than you lol
“That’s not true!” Jade hollered at her screen, making you chuckle. She then scowled at you, giving you a suspicious look. “It’s not, is it?”
You shook your head to appease her, though you never really once thought you had to pick a favorite between your two closest friends.
Jade: FALSE Jade: TOTALLY UNTRUE Jade: but dream on, ig Jade: what about the others? Adie? Adie: Here! Also,,,, I think y/n likes me best. Eunwoo: not true Jade: yeah, NOT TRUE! 8: Count me in! Jade: you're only in bcs trin's in 8: lol true
"He's not even denying it. This bitch," Jade sneered, but she was grinning.
Jade: Mingyu? Mingyu liked. Jade: Kim Mingyu?! Mingyu: yes Mingyu: it's not a party without me Jade: i'm sure we'll manage Jade: but okay. you're counted
And so everything was settled. Your friends are coming to spend the summer break with you in your hometown. You can already imagine how fun it’s going to be. Fingers crossed, you hoped this summer would be memorable—the best one yet.
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“How’s it going?” you asked, stepping onto the patio with a tray of food while your mom was setting the table.
“Good, I hope,” she replied, staring at the dining table set up with furrowed brows. “Do you think that spot looks a little—I don’t know… empty?”
You inspected the spot she was pointing to and giggled. “That’s because that spot is for the enchiladas,” you chimed in, placing the tray you were carrying on the table.
“Oh. Yeah, that makes sense.”
You gave her a reassuring squeeze on the arm. “Relax, Mom. I’m sure they’ll love it.”
She sighed, smiling apologetically. “I feel bad about not letting them stay.”
“It’s alright, Mom. We understand,” you reassured her. “And Jade’s got it covered. Their house will be empty for a month anyway, so she doesn’t mind housing our friends all summer.”
When you discussed accommodations with Jade, you considered offering to let a friend or two stay with you, but your mom didn’t agree. She was working on a big project, and you knew better than to burden her with strangers disrupting her concentration and clutter. This dinner party was her idea, her way of apologizing to your friends. She didn’t have to, but she insisted, saying she didn’t want them to think you were unwelcoming.
“Hello, hello,” Jade greeted when you opened the main door in response to the doorbell.
“Hi!” you greeted back, ushering them in and giving each of your friends a hug. They all looked excited, a few even brought gifts for your mom. Minghao and Trina had prepared an actual gift box, Adie was carrying a bottle of wine, and Eunwoo had a bouquet of flowers.
As you moved aside to let everyone in, you noticed Mingyu standing with someone you didn’t recognize.
“Hello, Gyu,” you said, giving him a quick hug. “Who’s this?”
“This is Vernon,” Mingyu introduced, clapping a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “He’s my roommate's classmate. Had nothing going on for summer break, so I thought I’d bring him along.”
“Your roommate’s classmate. Mr. Congeniality is at it again, I see,” you sneered, teasing your friend. To Vernon, you smiled warmly. “Nice to meet you, Vernon. Welcome to Azure Bay!”
“Thanks,” Vernon replied, smiling back a little shyly. “Nice to meet you too.”
You were intrigued by Vernon but didn’t question his presence further. Instead, you guided everyone to the patio where the table was beautifully set. Your mom greeted each guest warmly, expressing her gratitude for their gifts.
“Wow, this looks amazing!” Trina exclaimed as she took her seat.
“Thanks, Trina. I hope you all brought your appetites,” your mom said with a grin.
As everyone settled in, the conversations started to flow naturally. The aroma of delicious food filled the air, as well as laughter and lively chatter.
“So, Vernon, Mingyu’s roommate’s classmate,” Jade began, leaning forward with a curious look. “How did you even end up being friends with that guy?”
Mingyu scowled at Jade, looking indignant but he couldn’t retort because there was food in his mouth.
Vernon chuckled. “His roommate Jungwoo and I are in a class together. I hung out in their dorm room a lot when we were working on a project. Mingyu’s great, honestly. Keeps the place lively. Plus, he’s always cooking up something interesting.”
Mingyu laughed. “Hey, someone’s got to make sure we don’t starve!”
“I’ve heard about your cooking skills, Mingyu. My daughter said you can rival my cooking,” your mother said, playfully raising an eyebrow. “You’ll have to make us something while you’re here.”
“Ma’am, your mind will be blown. Deal!” Mingyu agreed, grinning.
As the meal continued, you found yourself sneaking glances at Vernon, who seemed to be fitting in well with your group. He was quiet but contributed thoughtfully to the conversations.
As the evening wound down, Jade clapped her hands together excitedly. “Alright, guys, now that we’re all well-fed, who’s ready to hit the party?”
You looked at her, raising an eyebrow. “What party?”
“The one at the beach!” Jade exclaimed. “Apparently, a bunch of people from our high school are throwing a welcome-back bash. I thought it’d be the perfect way to kick off the summer.”
“I didn’t know about this,” you said, glancing at the others.
“Sounds like a good time,” Vernon added, looking curious.
You smiled, feeling a mix of excitement and nerves. “Alright, let’s do it. It’ll be nice to see everyone again.”
“Great!” Jade said, practically bouncing with energy. “Let’s clean up here and head out.”
With everyone pitching in, the cleanup was quick and efficient. Soon, you were all ready to head to the beach, anticipation buzzing in the air. As you stepped out into the warm night, you couldn’t shake off the feeling that something about this party would catch you off-guard.
“It’s okay, y/n,” Jade beamed at you, slinging an arm over your shoulder. “No need to worry too much. It’s just Winwin.”
You gasped audibly, stopping in your tracks as you stared dumbfounded at Jade, your mouth still hanging open. “You sneaky little—”
“Jaehyun, baby! Wait for me!” she called out to her boyfriend before running to him.
The thought of going to a party and seeing an ex you hadn't seen in a long time was far from enjoyable. You stood there in shock, wondering if it was too late to turn back. Just then, Eunwoo wrapped his arm around your shoulder and gently nudged you forward.
“Are you okay?” he asked, striding with his long legs and dragging you with him.
“Fine. That was ages ago anyway so,” you replied nervously.
“What do you mean?” Eunwoo questioned curiously. You sighed and gave him an exasperated look. “Oh, shit. Winwin is gonna be there, isn’t he?”
“Who’s Winwin?” Mingyu questioned, appearing on your other side with Vernon.
“Keep your nosy ass out of my business, okay?” you chided, pointing your index finger at him.
Mingyu laughed, raising his hands in mock surrender. “Alright, alright. No need to get feisty.”
You caught Vernon glancing at you with curiosity in his eyes. Then Mingyu tapped his chest and said, “Azure parties are awesome.” 
Vernon smiled, nodding in acknowledgment. “Let’s hurry there then,” he suggested lightly.
As you all walked down the beach path, the sound of music and laughter grew louder. The beach was lit up with string lights and a bonfire, casting a warm glow over the gathering crowd. You could see familiar faces from high school, mingling and enjoying the summer night.
Trina and Minghao were already dancing near the bonfire, and you saw Jade and Jaehyun chatting with a group of old classmates. Adie was by the snack table, happily munching away, and Eunwoo was making his way to the drinks station.
Taking a deep breath, you decided to dive in and make the best of it. You spotted a quieter corner near the shoreline and made your way there. Vernon tagged along, but kept a respectful distance, allowing you space.
“Not a fan of big crowds?” he asked, glancing at the bustling party.
“Not really,” you admitted. “I prefer smaller gatherings. Less chaotic.”
“Hmmh, I see,” Vernon hummed, nodding.
“You?” you asked back just to be polite. “I doubt you disliked the crowd.”
“What makes you think so?” he questioned.
“You’re friends with Mingyu. I mean… Mingyu is you know… Mingyu. Life of the party. If you’re close to him, I figured you might be the same,” you explained as you both watched Mingyu take over the entire party.
Vernon looked puzzled but intrigued. “But he’s your friend too, right? And yet I don’t see any similarities between you.”
“Ah,” you blurted, chuckling. “Good point.”
Vernon chuckled, his laughter warm and genuine. He was about to say something more when a group of familiar faces approached. Recognizing some high school friends, you greeted them warmly.
“Elise!” you called, standing up to hug her. “Harper too. Wow, I thought you girls would never show up.”
As the night went on, you mingled with old friends, danced around the bonfire, and even managed to enjoy yourself. At one point, you found yourself standing by the drinks table when you spotted Winwin approaching. Your heart skipped a beat, but you decided to face it head-on.
“Hey, y/n,” Winwin greeted with a smile, holding a cup of punch. “Long time no see.”
“Hi, Win,” you replied, trying to keep your tone light. “How’ve you been?”
“Pretty good, actually. I just got back from uni yesterday. How about you?”
“Same here. I’m back for the summer too,” you said, feeling more relaxed as the conversation flowed naturally.
Winwin grinned. “Cool. It’s great to see you. We should catch up properly some time.”
“Yeah, that sounds good,” you agreed, surprised at how friendly the interaction was.
As Winwin moved on to talk to someone else, you felt a weight lift off your shoulders. You joined the bonfire again, where your friends were gathered, their faces illuminated by the warm, flickering glow of the flames.
Jade spotted you and waved you over. “Hey, come sit with us!” she called, patting the sand next to her.
You sat down, feeling the heat of the fire on your skin. The conversation flowed easily, with laughter and playful banter filling the air. Then you found yourself standing by the drinks table again, pouring yourself another cup of the spiked punch.
“Hello again!” Winwin approached you again, a friendly smile on his face. “Having fun?”
“Yeah, it’s been great,” you replied, smiling back. “How about you?”
“Me?” he quipped, taking a sip of his drink. “I’ve had six bottles of beer and maybe a liter of this punch.”
You laughed heartily, deeply humored. You and Winwin fell into an easy conversation, reminiscing about old times and catching up on what had happened since you last saw each other. His laughter was contagious, and soon you found yourself giggling until your cheeks were sore.
“Remember that time in high school when we snuck out to the beach at midnight?” Winwin asked, his eyes sparkling with mischief.
“Oh my god, yes!” you laughed. “And we got caught by the patrol officer. I thought we were going to get into so much trouble.”
“But we didn’t,” Winwin said, grinning. “We talked our way out of it. Good times.”
“Definitely,” you agreed, feeling a warm sense of nostalgia.
A burst of giggles made your heads turn in unison. From where you stood, you saw Vernon surrounded by girls, all of them smiling and giggling at something he said. Your eyes met his gaze, catching you off guard. Vernon just smiled and gave you an acknowledging nod.
“I see you made a lot of new friends,” Winwin prompted.
“Yeah, thank god. I had zero idea how to navigate life in a completely different school, and an entirely different city,” you replied, rolling your eyes in frustration. “Good thing Jade was there. These people basically found me first.”
“I knew you’d fare well. You’re an amiable person,” he complimented.
“Amiable?” you snorted. “That’s a nice word.”
Winwin shrugged and then clinked his glass with yours. “I learned plenty of big words in college.”
That comment made you laugh again while Winwin watched you fondly with a proud expression as if he was satisfied with his own humor that made you laugh. Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe he was just genuinely funny. You weren’t so sure, but you knew you were having a good time.
“Hi,” Vernon prompted, suddenly appearing beside you and making you shriek.
“Oh, god, Vernon,” you scolded, clutching your chest in shock and laughing at the same time.
“Having fun?” he asked, his curiosity piqued.
“Just reminiscing about high school and stuff,” Winwin explained with a chuckle.
“Oh, sounds interesting,” Vernon said, grabbing a cup of punch. “Anything I should know about?”
“Only that we were quite the troublemakers back in the day,” you said with a wink.
“Is that so?” Vernon said, raising an eyebrow. “I’ll have to keep an eye on you then.”
You laughed and nudged his arm with your elbow. “Don’t worry, I’ve mellowed out since then.”
“Good to know,” Vernon said, smiling. To Winwin, he said, “By the way, you were great at charades earlier.”
“Thanks,” Winwin replied, a little confused by the unexpected compliment. “I had a good time.”
“Hey, I scored the highest, but you’re complimenting him?” you complained to Vernon who just shrugged.
“He’s the one acting it out,” he retorted so you scoffed.
“Unbelievable!”
The conversation continued with Vernon and Winwin exchanging jokes and stories. It felt natural and comfortable, like catching up with old friends. As the night went on, you found yourself relaxing more, enjoying the company and the atmosphere.
Eventually, the party started winding down. You glanced around at your friends, feeling a sense of contentment. This summer was shaping up to be better than you had expected. As you walked back towards the bonfire, you felt a flicker of curiosity about Vernon. He was unexpectedly fun and you found yourself vibing with him easily. At the back of your mind, you hope he’s not trying to hit on you or something. After all, this was just another summer. A great summer with the potential to be your best yet, but still just another summer.
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The next morning, you woke up at Jade’s house, tired and hungover but still rising early. You slipped quietly out of Adie’s assigned bedroom, careful not to disturb her sleep. Outside the room, you tiptoed down the hallway, making sure not to wake anyone else.
“Leaving already?” a voice called from the balcony, startling you so much that you dropped your shoes on the wooden floorboards.
The sound echoed through the house, and you froze, hand over your mouth, listening intently to see if anyone had been woken. Vernon blinked at you, clearly puzzled by your reaction.
“Are you okay?” he asked, an amused smile playing on his lips.
“Yes, I’m fine!” you whispered urgently, pressing a finger to your lips to signal for silence. “Be quiet, will you? You're gonna wake everyone up."
He shrugged and stood up from the chair he was sitting on, approaching you. “Are you leaving already?”
“Yeah. I need to take a shower,” you replied, feeling grimy and imagining how you must smell after a night out. You eyed him curiously and saw he was wearing fresh clothes. “Why are you up so early?”
He shoved his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants. “Just felt like it.”
“No hangover or anything?” you questioned, surprised by his chipper demeanor.
“Nah, I’m good,” he replied nonchalantly.
“Lucky you,” you muttered as you continued down the stairs, Vernon trailing behind. “As for me, I need to go home and pass out. Gosh.”
“Don’t you need a ride?”
“I’ll grab a cab. It’s not that far,” you replied.
“Do you have food there?”
“What?” you asked, thinking you’d misheard him.
“Food,” he repeated.
You blinked at him, puzzled. Vernon just stood there, looking clueless yet endearing in the morning light.
“Food?” you repeated, and he nodded. “Yes, we have food. Why?”
His face lit up. “Can I come with you?”
Now you’re even more confused. “Why?”
“Oh, I woke up early and I looked for food in the kitchen but there wasn’t anything ready to eat. Nothing easy to cook either.” He flattened his lips together before adding, “I’m hungry.”
You chuckled at his straightforwardness. “Come on then.”
With that, Vernon grinned and followed you out the door, the morning sun casting long shadows on the quiet street. Your house was quiet when you arrived, but the windows were open, and the curtains were drawn, a clear telling that your mom had already started her morning. Leading Vernon inside, you caught sight of your mom in her office, her attention momentarily diverted from her computer as she noticed your arrival.
“You’re back so early! Did you have breakfast yet?” she called out, her voice carrying through the house.
“Actually,” you began, glancing back at Vernon behind you. “No, I haven’t.”
“Sorry, sweetie. I didn’t know you’d be back early, so nothing’s prepared in the kitchen,” she replied from her desk.
“It’s okay, Mom. I’ll whip something up. Oh, and I've got a friend with me,” you added.
“Oh, you do? Silly me,” she chuckled, standing up and heading towards the door of her office. “Make something nice for your friend, okay? I have work that I need to finish by today.”
“Sure thing,” you affirmed, smiling as she closed the door. “Would you like me to bring you food in there?”
You heard her muffled response. “No, baby. I’ve already eaten!”
“Wow, okay. Not a baby anymore,” you muttered to yourself, feeling a slight flush of embarrassment. Turning back to Vernon, you said, “Do you mind waiting while I go freshen up?”
“I don’t mind,” he replied, settling onto the couch and pulling out his phone.
You took a quick shower and got dressed comfortably. As you headed to the kitchen, you mentally surveyed the ingredients available, already formulating a plan for breakfast. Vernon followed you when he saw you, his presence bringing a comfortable energy to the space.
“So, what’s your specialty?” Vernon asked, leaning against the kitchen counter with genuine curiosity.
“Hmm, I’d say my omelets are pretty decent,” you replied, pulling out eggs and vegetables from the refrigerator. “But today, I’m thinking scrambled eggs with toast. What do you think?”
“I eat anything and everything,” Vernon said with a grin, taking a seat at the kitchen island.
As you chopped vegetables and cracked eggs into a bowl, you engaged in light conversation, discussing topics ranging from favorite foods to travel destinations. It was easy, effortless, and surprisingly enjoyable.
Before you knew it, the eggs were sizzling in the pan, filling the kitchen with a mouthwatering aroma. The toast came out perfectly golden, and you served two plates of food, setting one in front of Vernon and the other across from him.
“Thanks so much,” he said, smiling as he picked up his fork.
“Do you know what’s the plan for today?” you asked, taking a bite of your breakfast.
Vernon shrugged. “Swimming.”
Your eyes flicked to the patio where the outdoor pool glistened. “At Jade’s house?”
He shook his head. “I think she mentioned the beach. Some of the guys want to try surfing.”
“Oh, so they’re heading here today,” you said, glancing out toward the shoreline. “The perfect spot for surfing is right outside this house.”
“I see. So I can just wait for them here?”
“You could, but don’t you need your gear?”
“If you mean my surfing gear, I don’t have any.”
You scowled playfully. “Then how do you plan to surf?”
“I’m hoping if I walk along the beach, I’ll find a rental shop or something.”
You chuckled. “You don’t need a rental.”
“Really?”
“Yeah,” you said proudly, nodding.
Once the kitchen was tidied up, you led Vernon to the backyard and showed him the shed where you kept your swimming and surfing gear. He looked impressed by the collection of surfboards, wetsuits, and even fishing equipment.
“Do you surf?” he asked and you rolled your eyes. There are at least five boards in that shed, shouldn’t it be obvious enough?
“Do I?” you quipped. “Yeah, I do. Did. I haven’t surfed in a long time.”
“Why not?” He reached for a purple board, carefully pulling it from the rack.
“I just lost interest. No grand reason behind it. My dad taught me how to surf but we haven’t done it in a long time so… yeah,” you trailed off, watching him put the board back where it belonged.
“You still remember how, right?” he asked, and you just shrugged. Then his eyes lit up as he spotted something. “Is that a spear?”
“Oh, that’s my dad’s,” you said, pushing the fishing gear further back into the shed. “He used to do a lot of spearfishing.”
“Cool.”
Your brows furrowed. “Cool? Didn't you say you were an environmentalist?”
“Spearfishing is fine as long as it’s practiced responsibly and with respect to local regulations and conservation efforts.”
You nodded in acknowledgment. “I see. Well, in that case, my dad is a pretty responsible fisher. He used to be the head of the coastal preservation council here.”
“Your dad sounds really cool. Is he around?”
“He is cool,” you said, smiling proudly. “But no, he’s not here right now.”
“I see,” Vernon replied, leaning against the shed door as he watched you rummage through the items. As you were looking through the snorkeling box, you accidentally knocked over another box and sent the contents spilling all over the floor.
“Oh, god,” you groaned, picking up the items on the floor. Vernon was quick to help you, chuckling.
“What are these?” he asked, examining the surfwax bars.
“It’s surfwax. You rub it all over the surfboard so you don’t slip,” you explained, taking the stuff from his hand to pack it away. When it was done, you lifted the box to put it back on the shelf.
Vernon chuckled softly. “Here, let me.” Before you could protest, he reached out and took the box from you, his fingers brushing against yours for a moment.
“Thanks,” you mumbled, stepping back to give him space. But instead of moving away, Vernon stepped closer, his focus entirely on the shelf as he lifted the box into place.
You felt a sudden rush of shyness as his arm brushed against your shoulder, the proximity making your heart skip a beat. The scent of his cologne, fresh and woodsy, filled the air between you, and you could feel the warmth radiating from his body.
“Is this the right spot?” he asked, glancing down at you with a smile, completely unaware of the effect his closeness had on you.
“Uh, yeah,” you stammered, your cheeks flushing. “That’s perfect.”
Vernon adjusted the box, making sure it was secure before stepping back. But instead of moving away, he turned to face you, his face just inches from yours. You could see the tiny flecks of gold in his big brown eyes, and the playful smile that often danced on his lips. The room seemed to grow quieter, the moment stretching as you both stood there. For a moment, neither of you moved, caught in the unexpected closeness.
“Are you okay?” he asked, startling you so you took a step back. In doing so, you kicked the foot of the shelf and knocked over a bucket sitting on top of it. Cool water splashed all over you and Vernon, making you gasp in shock.
“Oh no! I’m so sorry!” you exclaimed, patting his shirt as if it would help dry him in any way.
Vernon looked down at his soaked self and chuckled. “That’s one way to cool off.”
“Oh, god. Why is there a bucket of water in here?” You looked up at the top of the shelf and noticed a small dot of light pouring from a hole in the roof. “That hole seriously needs patching up. Come on, let’s get you cleaned up.”
“It’s fine. We’ll go swimming later anyway,” said Vernon, squeezing water out of his shirt.
“But I don’t know for how long that water’s been sitting there,” you said shyly. It may be just rainwater but you know it hasn’t rained in Azure Bay for more than a week now.
��Oh,” he exclaimed, realization dawning on him.
“Follow me.”
You led him to the poolside, pointing to the outdoor shower. “You can rinse off there. I’ll find a towel and something for you to wear while your clothes dry.”
“Ah, how convenient.” Vernon smiled gratefully. “Thanks, y/n.”
As he rinsed off, you quickly fetched a towel and a spare pair of shorts from the poolside storage. You were drenched too, but you can rinse off in your bathroom upstairs. In the meantime, you headed back to Vernon with the spare clothes and the towel.
You approached the shower area, holding out the towel and shorts. “Here you go—” The words died in your throat as you caught sight of Vernon, his shirt already off, revealing a well-toned torso glistening with water. He turned, surprised, and for a moment, you were both frozen.
“Uh, thanks,” he said, taking the towel from you, a shy smile spreading across his face.
You felt your cheeks heat up and quickly turned away, trying to steady your racing heart. “The, uh... The washer is by the kitchen. You can throw your clothes in the dryer.”
"Alright."
"Right. I'll let you finish up."
You hurried inside, your mind swirling with the unexpected sight of Vernon. As you headed to your bathroom, you couldn’t help but feel a mix of embarrassment and something else you couldn’t quite name. After a quick shower, you changed into dry clothes and took a deep breath, trying to collect yourself.
When you returned to the poolside, Vernon was lounging on a chair, wearing the shorts you’d given him and toweling off his hair. He looked up and grinned.
“Feeling better?” he asked.
You nodded, keeping your eyes on his face and not letting it wander on his bare chest. “Yeah. You?”
“Much better,” he replied, still smiling. “Thanks for the help. I guess I owe you one.”
You waved it off, smiling back. “Don’t worry about it.”
“Right,” he agreed, his eyes twinkling with amusement.
You heard car horns honking from outside so you told Vernon to feel at home before heading to the gate. As expected, it was your friends arriving for the surfing thing they had planned for today.
“Fucking finally,” you muttered, trying to level your head after the tense events that transpired with Vernon.
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“Vernon? Why, what’s up with him?” Jade inquired after you asked her about Vernon.
“Nothing. He’s just…” you paused, trying to find the right word. “...intriguing.”
“Intriguing? Interesting choice of word, y/n,” Trina teased, hitting your waist with hers as you both stood in front of your full-length mirror to see how your bikinis looked.
“I think she meant he’s cute and she’s interested,” Adie taunted from your bed.
You rolled your eyes at them. “I’m just curious, alright? Aren’t you? I mean, he’s new and we barely know him.”
“Oh, I do know him,” Trina said. “He’s friends with Hao too, you know. His name is actually Hansol Chwe.”
“Hansol Chwe?” you repeated curiously.
“Yeah. But Vernon is his english name. He’s actually a sophomore and he transferred from… I’m not sure where, but he’s a new student,” Trina continued.
Jade snapped his fingers. “Then it makes sense that he hasn’t hung out with us until now. He’s a neophyte.”
“So, what about him intrigues you, y/n?” Trina asked, a mischievous smile playing on her lips.
“Did you two have a cutesy romcom-ish morning together?” Adie accused, pointing at you. “He had breakfast here, right?”
Jade interjected. “Or did you hook up while we were passed out at home?”
You gasped, scandalized. “What? Hook up? What do you take me for?”
“Ah, so you didn’t.”
“Did you make out while you were alone here or something?” Trina asked.
“You guys are crazy,” you told them, heading for the door. “We didn’t do any of that. We just ate, that’s all.”
“It was a cutesy romcom-ish morning, then,” Adie giggled, trailing behind you.
“It was not that either,” you insisted. “I’m done talking about this. He’s just another guy.”
Right, he is. A handsome guy, for sure, but he’s just another pretty guy. You’ve met countless pretty guys. Hot guys have flirted with you several times, especially on this beach. You’re friends with pretty guys. And you have, most certainly, seen them walk around topless plenty of times. Eunwoo is a literal angel. Jaehyun and Minghao are eye candies. And did you see Mingyu’s physique? You are literally surrounded by hot guys that you don’t even bat an eye on anymore.
So why is it that you can’t look at the topless Vernon without your heart skipping a beat?
“Y/n, come here!” your girlfriends called out from the shore. You just waved your arms, not even moving an inch from where you were comfortably seated.
On one side of the bay, you could see the boys on the surfboards, paddling on the calm waters since the tide wasn’t high enough for surfing. Vernon was making his way towards you, leaving the board on the sand.
“Reading while everyone’s having fun? Are you not like other girls?” he quipped, standing next to the beach bed where you were reading a book.
“I simply just had enough saltwater,” you replied nonchalantly, hiding your nervousness behind your big sunglasses.
“So, not like other girls?” he repeated, sitting on the beach bed next to yours. 
You chuckled lightly. “Trust me, Hansol, I’m just like every other girl.”
“Hansol?”
You glanced sideways at him. “It’s your name, isn’t it?”
“It is, but no one calls me that,” he replied. “You can call me Hansol, though.”
“I’m honored,” you retorted, chuckling as you returned your attention to your book. “But I won’t do that. It’s not like we’re close or anything.”
“How close do you need us to be?” he asked. You glanced back at him, just in time to see him lean closer, stopping just a few inches away so your noses don’t touch. 
“What are you doing?” you asked, trying not to stutter. You could only hope that your sunglasses were dark enough for him not to see your eyes.
A mischievous glint flickered in Vernon's eyes as he leaned in even closer, his voice dropping to a husky whisper. “Is this close enough?”
“Move back,” you whispered, barely audible because you were sure you’d kiss if you so much as breathe.
He obeyed, slumping back on the beach bed with a content smile. Only then did you breathe properly again. Irritated, you stood up and walked away, leaving your book behind. After several steps, you glanced back to see Vernon had taken your book and was now reading it.
“She’s coming this way!” Adie shouted, pointing at you as your friends turned to look.
Eunwoo and Mingyu rushed out of the water, their eyes twinkling with mischief. Recognizing their intentions, you started running along the shore to escape them. But your limbs were no match for their long strides. They eventually caught up to you, and Mingyu swooped you up by the waist. Shrieking and kicking your legs in the air, you cursed at him, but he ignored you completely and leaped into the water with you.
Your splash into the cool water was met with laughter from everyone around. The initial shock of the cold quickly gave way to the exhilarating fun of being in the water. Mingyu's grip loosened, allowing you to find your footing in the shallow water, though you were already drenched from head to toe.
“Eunwoo, you traitor!” you called out, splashing water at him.
He laughed, dodging your attempts. “Hey, it’s not my fault you’re a slow runner!”
Vernon eventually waded into the water, holding one of your flip-flops above his head. “Look what I saved from the water!”
“Give it back!” you demanded, wading toward him.
He grinned, holding it just out of reach. “You’ll have to catch me first!”
It turned into a game of tag, with you chasing Vernon around to retrieve your slipper. After several minutes of playful chaos, you finally managed to snatch it from Vernon’s hand, clutching it triumphantly to your chest. But your victory was short-lived after Jaehyun sneaked up behind you to steal it again.
He held it up, making it impossible for you to reach it. “How long before you can take this from us?”
“Us?” you questioned and Jaehyun responded by tossing the slipper to Minghao, who then threw it to Eunwoo.
The game of tag resumed and continued as your girlfriends joined in, making it a game of Boys vs. Girls. You splashed and chased each other and the beach echoed with laughter and shouts of joy.
After a while, the group tired out and decided to take a break under the beach umbrellas. You spread out towels and settled into the lounge chairs, feeling the sun's warmth on your skin as it dried off the seawater. The boys sat on the towels, discussing the best surf spots and the timing of the tide.
“It should be high tide soon, right?” Jaehyun asked, glancing at you since you were the more experienced surfer in the group, thus making you more well-versed in the tides.
You looked at the sea, and then at your watch. “Yeah, it should be. Look the waves are getting bigger.”
Mingyu whistled excitedly. “It’s going to be epic.”
“Shouldn’t be long now,” you commented, leaning back on the beach bed and closing your eyes.
As you lay there, soaking in the sun and the sound of the waves, Eunwoo turned to you with a playful smile. “You should come out with us and show these newbies how it’s done.”
“Pass,” you deadpanned. “I’m tired.”
“You’ll miss out then,” he countered.
“I’ll get over it.”
“I could teach you,” Vernon offered, making you open your eyes to look at him. He smiled when you caught his gaze, but you just rolled your eyes and wore your sunglasses.
“Hard pass.”
Vernon scoffed, indignant. “What? I’m actually quite good at it.”
“Really? Have fun then,” you said monotonously. You were not just trying to be aloof. It was true that you were tired from all the playing and the swimming.
Time passed lazily as you lounged under the umbrellas, the sun slowly descending towards the horizon. You even snoozed for a bit, waking up with a jolt and wondering if you were out for three minutes or a whole hour. You saw that your friends were already surfing and the only ones left in the shade were you and Adie.
“That was a good one, Haohao!” you heard Trina shout and saw her waving happily by the shore.
The sight of them paddling out into the surf was captivating. They cut through the waves with practiced ease, their shouts of triumph carrying back to shore whenever they caught a particularly good wave. Vernon, true to his word, was a natural, effortlessly gliding along the waves.
You continued to watch from the comfort of your lounge chair, enjoying the peaceful rhythm of the waves and the distant laughter of your friends. As the sun dipped lower, painting the sky in breathtaking shades of orange and pink, the surfers finally began to make their way back to shore. Groaning and sighing, everyone settled down to dry off and bask in the warmth of the remaining sunlight. You stayed longer to watch the sunset, take pictures, and feel the warm dusk breeze.
“Should we head back to the house?” you suggested, glancing at the darkening sky.
“Yeah, I’m getting hungry,” Mingyu agreed, pouting. 
Gathering your belongings, you all made your way back to the beach house. The walk was filled with more lighthearted chatter and the occasional burst of laughter. By the time you reached the house, the first stars were twinkling in the sky.
You were amazed to find barbecue being prepared at the poolside patio by your mother and Elise, a high school friend of yours. She greeted you and Jade with hugs and giggles.
“Oh, mom, you didn’t have to do all this,” you told your mom, feeling grateful and shy. 
“It’s alright, hun,” she chimed, flipping the barbecue over. “I had help from Elise here.”
You eyed Elise, equipped with tongs and a black apron over her dress. “I bumped into her at the grocery store and she invited me over for dinner.”
“Thanks for coming. Jade and I were actually talking about hanging with you guys a while ago,” you told her while you ushered your friends to the shower area so they can wash up.
“That can be arranged, but if you haven’t come up with anything yet, you should join us next weekend.”
“Next weekend?” you questioned, opening your mouth to accept the piece of barbecue your mom was feeding you.
“Talk about it later, girls. After you’re cleaned and decent,” your mom chided softly, poking your bare waist and grimacing at your bikini.
Giggling, you headed inside the house and heard your mom telling you not to step on the carpet with your sandy feet. Seeing the carpeted floor of your living room and stairs, you decided not to climb up to your bedroom and use the kitchen bathroom instead. 
Quietly slipping inside, you locked the door behind you, only to freeze when you turned to find Vernon standing under the showerhead, a look of surprise mirrored on both your faces.
“Oh my god!” you exclaimed, instinctively covering your eyes with your hands. “Don’t you lock doors when you’re using the bathroom?”
Vernon chuckled, his relaxed demeanor contrasting with your flustered state. “I was here with Mingyu. He didn’t lock it when he left.”
“You were here with Mingyu?” you asked, surprised and maybe a little malicious.
“No. He let me in after he was done,” he clarified and then you felt warm water being splashed at you. “Take your mind out of the gutter.”
You looked straight at him, feeling defensive. “I didn’t say anything!” He wasn’t completely naked. He still had his shorts on.
“You were thinking it,” he retorted, smirking. He turned the shower on, closing his eyes as the water hit his face.
Nervous, you turned the knob but it was locked. You fumbled with it for a few seconds, suddenly clueless about how it worked.
“You don’t have to leave. I’m done here,” he said after a while, turning the shower off.
“Hurry up then.”
You watched him reach for the towel and wipe his face as he walked towards the door. Realizing you were in front of it, you moved aside so he could leave. Instead of heading for the door, however, Vernon went straight to you, not breaking eye contact and stopping only when your feet touched.
“W-What?” you stammered, trying to maintain your composure as you met his gaze. Vernon didn’t say a word and just stared at you. Shy, you looked away and pushed him.
He held your hands and kept it on his chest. Then he said, “I need my clothes.”
“Your clothes?” you questioned, still not meeting his gaze. “Yeah, it’s up in my room. You can ask Jade for them, or Adie. They’ll know which one it is.”
He tightened his hold of your hands when you tried to withdraw them. Softly, he said, “You know, I think I've been wanting to do something for a while now.”
You looked up at him. “What is it?”
The tension between you lingered in the air, thickening with each passing moment as you found yourselves locked in a silent exchange of gazes. Vernon's eyes bore into yours, searching for something that you weren't sure you were ready to give.
"Just say 'no' and I'll be on my way," he finally broke the silence, his voice low and tinged with a hint of uncertainty.
You swallowed hard, the weight of his words hanging heavy in the air as you struggled to find the right response. But when you opened your mouth to speak, the words caught in your throat, leaving you speechless. Vernon seemed to take your silence as an answer.
Your whole body ached with anticipation as you inched towards each other, the distance between you narrowing until there was barely a breath of space left. Each moment spent together today had been leading up to this, a series of shared glances, lingering touches, and unspoken words building a tension that was both exhilarating and terrifying.
And then, without warning, his lips met yours in a tender kiss, sending a rush of warmth coursing through your veins. It was soft, gentle, and fleeting as if you were both testing the waters. Then you met again in another kiss, this time deeper, more urgent, and more intense. With ease, your tongue pushed inside his mouth, clashing with his. Then he bit your lip just enough to make you moan. You held on to his arm, knees weakened by the tingling sensations and the swirling emotions. Vernon held your back firmly, keeping you in place.
By the time you pulled away, you were both breathless and shocked. Vernon flashed a handsome smile, his breath fanning your face as he chuckled a little. His hands trailed down to your arms, holding them gently.
“I liked that,” Vernon echoed, his voice barely a whisper. “I liked that a lot.”
You giggled shyly, touching your lips. “Shut up.”
“I mean it!” he insisted, biting his lower lip as if to savor the lingering feeling of the kiss.
“Alright! You mean it. Be quiet about it!” you chided jokingly. 
As Vernon and you were caught up in the aftermath of your kiss, a sudden knock on the bathroom door startled both of you. You exchanged a quick, bewildered glance before Vernon moved to open the door very slightly. To your surprise, it was Mingyu standing there. You pressed your finger on your lips, gesturing at Vernon to not let him know you were there.
“Jade said these are yours,”  said Mingyu and you saw Vernon take the clothes in his hand.
With a forced smile, Vernon replied, "Thanks, man. I'll be out in a minute."
Mingyu's brow furrowed in suspicion as he peered into the bathroom. "Alright, but hurry up. We're all waiting for you."
As Mingyu turned to leave, you held your breath, praying he wouldn't be suspicious. Once he was out of earshot, Vernon let out a nervous chuckle, running a hand through his hair. You awkwardly walked to the shower, facing the wall so Vernon could get dressed. After about two minutes, you felt him approaching you from behind and pressing a quick peck on your cheek.
“I’ll see you outside?” he asked.
Smiling, you nodded and tilted your head to face him. “Sure.”
It took a while before you could calm down and properly wash up. And a few more minutes of pacing around your room before you got dressed and joined everyone for dinner. Everyone asked what took you so long and you coughed up a random excuse as you sat on the vacant chair next to Eunwoo. Your eyes met Vernon’s throughout the night, while you were thinking about the potential complications of your newfound connection.
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You were on a quiet beach, eerily familiar but also unfamiliar. Waves crashed against the rocks, breaking the quietness of the night. The moon hung high in the sky, giving the sea an enchanting, silvery twinkle. The air was calm and cold as you scanned the horizon, your heart racing with curiosity and apprehension. 
“Where am I?” you asked yourself, walking towards the array of beach beds and closed umbrellas. As you were about to sit, you were startled by a loud sound of waves crashing against the rocky cliff up ahead. You glanced in that direction where you could see a figure illuminated by the ethereal moonlight.
“Who’s there?” you called out, only for your voice to echo back into your ear. The eerie sound made you gasp and in a blink of an eye, you found yourself lying on the grass. The sun was bright, stinging your eyes, so you tried to block it with your hand.
“I’ve been wanting to do something for a while now,” said a voice beside you that you immediately recognized. You glanced sideways, and lying on the grass next to you, was Vernon, his eyes filled with an intensity that sent shivers down your spine.
Your vision blurred again, the scene shifting into an entirely different place. You were panting and moaning as you straddled Vernon, a scent of perfume and sweat permeating the air. His grip was strong on your waist and your head was tilted back, lost in the moment of passion. He then touched your face, willing you to look him in the eyes.
But just as you were about to speak, to lean in and kiss his lips, the dream shifted, dissolving into darkness as you were pulled back into the realm of wakefulness. You blinked, disoriented, trying to understand what had just happened.
“Oh,” you blurted, and hearing your own voice caused a bolt of electricity to shoot through your body, jolting you awake.
Gasping for breath, you sat up in bed, your heart pounding in your chest. The remnants of the dream clung to you, vivid and almost tangible. You glanced around your darkened room, the shadows and furniture outline bringing you back to reality. It had felt so real, so intense. And yet, it was just a dream.
Frustrated, you buried your face in your hands, shaking your head violently as if to expel the lewd images in your mind. Then for a moment, you sat there in the silence of the night, the memory of the dream still fresh and unsettling.
“What the actual fuck,” you sighed, shocked, scandalized, and utterly bewildered. The sensations, the closeness—it was too much.
Just then, your phone buzzed, breaking the silence. You grabbed it from the bedside table, squinting at the screen to recognize the username of the person who had followed you. Not that you needed any effort; ‘vernonline’ was practically a complete government ID.
“Of all the people who could decide to follow me right now,” you muttered, swiping to see his profile. You scrolled through his posts as you lay back down, stopping at a particularly good-looking photo of him. As you studied his features, images from the dream started flashing in your mind, making you toss the phone away and bury your face in your pillow.
“Gosh, y/n, what the hell was that?” you scolded yourself, kicking your sheets aggressively and stopping only when your phone buzzed again.
You peeked at your screen and saw that Vernon had messaged you.
Vernon: Can’t sleep? You: Can’t. Vernon: What are you up to?
“Having sex with you in my dream, dumbass,” you blurted, exhaling sharply.
You: Idk, nothing. Vernon: Meet me at the bay by your house?
You scowled, dictating as you typed a reply. “‘Now?’” Biting your nails, you stared at your screen as you waited for his reply.
Vernon: Yes. I’m out here right now
“What?” you blurted, standing up at once and rushing to your window to see if he was telling the truth. Sure enough, there was Vernon, seated on one of the beach beds. The beach was a distance away, but you could clearly see him, his face illuminated by the glow of his phone. You decided to call him, and he picked up quickly.
“What are you doing out there?” you asked, glancing at your watch. It’s almost midnight.
“I don’t know. I was walking down the beach from Jade’s house, getting some fresh air. I didn’t stop until I realized how far I’d come. Then I saw that I was almost at your house, so I just kept walking.”
“Stay there,” you told him, hanging up. You grabbed a jacket and rushed out of the house to meet him.
Vernon greeted you with a sweet smile, tilting his head handsomely as you approached. He looked cozy in his black hoodie and denim jeans. As you drew nearer, you couldn't help but wrestle with the vivid memories of your dream and your sanity's efforts to push it to the back of your mind.
“Walking from Jade’s house all the way here? Surely you can come up with a better excuse,” you joked as soon as you reached him.
Vernon chuckled heartily, shoving his hands into his hoodie pockets. “Alright, you got me. I came all the way here just to see you.”
His words sent a shiver down your spine, a mix of excitement and nervousness. The dream had left a lingering impression, and now here he was, as real as the cool night breeze. 
“In the middle of the night?” you asked, sitting on the chair opposite his.
“Yes. And I did walk all the way here.”
You scowled, unconvinced. “No, you didn’t.”
“Actually, I did. It’s not that far if you follow the beach line,” he said, then pointed somewhere behind him. “See that bright light there? That’s Jade’s house.”
You looked at where he was pointing, squinting to see the faint glow in the distance. “Wow, you really did walk all the way here,” you admitted with a hint of surprise in your voice.
Vernon shrugged casually. “Told you so.”
A comfortable silence settled between you as the sound of the waves filled the air. The moonlight cast a soft glow over the sea, and you could hear the faint music from the beachfront bars nearby.
“So, what made you walk all the way here?” you asked, breaking the silence. “Can't sleep?”
He shrugged, his gaze fixed on the gentle waves lapping at the shore. “Yeah. Thought maybe a walk would help clear my mind.”
“Did it?” you asked, curious about what was going on in his mind.
Vernon turned to you, his eyes catching the faint moonlight. “Not really. But seeing you... that helps.”
You felt your cheeks warm, grateful for the dim light hid your blush. Scoffing in feigned indifference, you said, “Smooth talker.”
He laughed, the sound blending harmoniously with the night. “I don’t know. You’ve been running in my head all night. All day, actually.”
“Did you come here to sweet talk me?”
“Nah, I came because…” he paused, hesitating. Then he sighed, deciding not to continue. “Forget it. What’s the dream about?”
You froze, not expecting the question. “What makes you think I had a dream?”
“You looked like you were woken up from a good sleep,” he said, a teasing smile playing on his lips.
You laughed nervously. “Just a random dream, nothing important.”
Thankfully he didn’t press for answers and quietly leaned on the beach bed. There was no exchange of words for a while, and you sat there feeling impatient and nervous. You didn’t want to leave yet but you couldn’t find a reason to stay. 
“Do you regret it?” Vernon asked quietly, his voice calming your jittery hands. “The kiss?”
Looking at him, you shook your head. “No, I don’t. Do you?”
“Not for a second,” he said firmly. “I just don’t know where to go from here.”
You took a deep breath, gathering your thoughts. “Maybe we don’t need to have all the answers right now. Maybe we can just... see where this goes.”
Vernon studied you for a moment, then nodded. “Are you sure?”
“Yeah, why not?”
Vernon rose to his feet and occupied the space next to you. You were nervous, but you didn’t shy away from him this time. When he lifted your chin to meet his gaze, you placed a hand on his neck. When he leaned in for a kiss, you met him halfway and with equal eagerness. Next thing you know, you were moaning on the beach bed, Vernon’s kisses peppering the skin along your neck while his hands roamed your body. 
Your hand was firm on his back, holding on for dear life as he explored your body for the spots that electrified you. Eventually, his lips found their way back to yours, sucking, nipping, and biting while you pressed your body against his. Your jacket has long been discarded, and your skin is wet with sweat despite the cool evening breeze. Vernon was impatient, having kissed every inch of your neck and collarbone before you gave him permission to go further.
He lifted your nightgown first, revealing your belly where he left a trail of sweet little kisses. His touch was electric, sending your mind spiraling with lust and anticipation. Then he stopped in front of your underwear, breathing warmly against it before cupping it with his big hand.
“You sure you wanna do this?” he asked, snapping you back into reality.
You blinked, looking around at the deserted beach. Then you immediately sat up, fixing the straps of your nightgown back in place.
“What the hell are we doing?” you exclaimed, standing up at once. Vernon’s face dropped, looking disappointed and understanding at the same time. You picked up your jacket on the sand, grabbed his hand, and led him to your house.
Vernon tugged you back, locking you in his arms and asking, “Are you sure?”
Groaning, you tiptoed to kiss him. “Very sure. Just not here.”
You slipped into the house quietly, careful not to wake your mom or make a sound. At one point, Vernon almost knocked over a plant hanging by the staircase. Luckily, he caught it before it could hit the floor and you laughingly put it back.
As soon as you reached your room, you grabbed Vernon’s collar and kissed him. Vernon was just as excited, brazenly slipping his hands underneath your nightgown to feel the skin of your back and grab a handful of your ass. A moan escaped your lips when he gave it a squeeze. You grabbed his hand to stop him from doing it again.
“Sorry,” he grinned, pecking at your lips.
“No, I like it. But don’t do it. We can’t be loud,” you whispered, reaching behind him to turn the lock on your door. “My mom’s a light sleeper.”
“Right, okay,” he obliged before swooping your cheek to kiss you again. “Any chance you have condoms tucked away somewhere?”
“Crap. I don’t,” you replied, brows knitting together. “But I’m on the pill.”
“Okay. Good.”
By the time you reached the bed, Vernon had discarded his hoodie and your nightgown lay on a heap on the floor. Neither of you wanted to stop kissing, but you had to when you climbed the bed and laid on your back.
“Wow,” he blurted, feasting his eyes on the nakedness before him. The way he smirked and bit his lower lip at the sight of you made you feral. “I knew it.”
“Knew what?” you asked shyly, feeling self-conscious.
He crept up to you, propping himself in his arms as he hovered over you. Then he whispered, his voice deep and melodic. “I knew you looked way better without those bikinis from earlier.”
Normally, you’d be all red and embarrassed if someone complimented you. But right now, all you are feeling is a boost of confidence and the strong urge to challenge his patience.
“Oh yeah? Now that explains why you were ogling me all day,” you purred, one hand on his neck while the other traced a line from his cheek down to his chest.
Vernon smirked. “Says you who gave me nothing but shorts to wear all day.”
You giggled when he kissed your neck. “That was unintentional.”
He hummed against your skin. “So are my occasional glances at your bikini-clad ass. Let’s not hold it against each other, love.”
The endearment had your stomach fluttering as you were dragged into the vice of his lips again. You matched his fervor, tugging, biting, battling your tongue with his, running your fingers through his scalp and grabbing a handful of his hair. His lips moved to your breast, one hand fondling the other as his tongue circled and sucked on your nipple. You cried out when he pinched it, and your hand flew over your mouth to prevent yourself from making any sound– however too late it may be.
“Vernon,” you called softly, squeezing your thighs together.
Vernon flashed a playful grin before he reached between your thighs to touch your clothed sex. “How quickly can you cum?”
You raised an eyebrow. “Why? Are you in a hurry or something?”
“Not at all,” he replied, shaking his head. “I need to know if I want to impress you on our first time.”
You groaned, propping yourself up on your elbows. “Can we just save that for next time?”
“Alright, alright,” he chuckled, holding your knees and parting them. “You’re an impatient one.”
“And you’re chatty,” you scoffed, kissing him once more as he ripped your underwear off.
“Don’t you know how important communication is?” he teased. Without warning, he took a long, wet lick of your cunt, sending pleasant shivers down your spine. You bit your lower lip, stifling the lewd sounds of pleasure that were trying to escape your mouth. 
Then he repeated it several times more before positioning himself between your legs. You didn’t even notice that he had taken off his pants. Your entire body ached with lust and anticipation for what was about to come. Vernon took his sweet time peppering your neck and chest with kisses.
“Vernon,” you pleaded with desperation in your voice, throwing all self-respect out the window.
The tip of his cock prodded your cunt, pushing ever so slightly as he tried to test how difficult or how easy it would be to get in. You gasped when his head went in, and whimpered when he bottomed out in one go. A delightful pain shot through your body, one that’s electrifying and satisfying. The way his dick stretched you was wonderful, nearly perfect.
“Are you okay?” he asked, his face twitching with what you can only assume as satisfaction.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” you whispered, breathless and exhilarated. 
He moved once, observing your reaction. After another thrust, he was able to confirm that you were doing fine so he started bucking his hips rhythmically, sending ripples of pleasure through your body. As he kept going, you tried to keep quiet but it proved difficult when he was ramming into you while sucking the skin on your neck. You were holding back so hard that you could only whimper and gasp, leaving you so frustrated that you felt like crying.
Vernon's grip under your thighs tightened, his breathing erratic as he tried not to make loud sounds. His strangled grunts, the sharp intake of air, along with the raspy curses and quiet whispers of dirty sweet nothings in your ear made you dizzy, so much that you swear you’re seeing stars on your ceiling.
“So… fucking… tight,” he grunted, thrusting harder and deeper.
“Oh, god,” you mewled, and repeated your words again when he continued, “Oh, god, Vernon!”
You thought you could go for a long time, but the slight change in his pace reached places you never expected him to find so easily. You arched your body towards him, digging your nails on his shoulder as you neared the sweet bliss of release. Your eyes were rolling back, going out of your mind due to intense pleasure.
“Vernon,” you murmured, brows knitting, puppy-eyed, and biting your lip. “Please… Please don’t stop… Aagh— don’t you… fucking… stop!”
Vernon heeded your plea, losing his mind over your desperate face. He locked your lips in a kiss, muffling your moans as the twisted knot in your belly exploded. Mouth hanging open, you felt lightheaded and weak, every sound fading into a static noise as every ounce of energy left your limbs. 
Your vision shifted out of focus for a second, and then you were met by Vernon’s proud smirk. Sighing in relief, you reached to wipe the sweat on his forehead. He was still inside you, moving very slowly as you basked in the joy of your orgasm. He looked hotter in this view, a thin sheen of sweat covering his entire body. 
“How was that?” he asked, smirking. You rolled your eyes to discourage his smug attitude, but the grin on your lips was evidence of your satisfaction. He added, “Mind if I finish?”
Suddenly, it clicked. He wasn’t done yet! “Please. Go ahead.”
Vernon inhaled sharply before he started ramming his hips into you again. The sensations rushed back into you, making you gasp and whimper. He was going at an unsteady but brutal pace, thrusting faster and harder as he chased his orgasm. With a rough grunt and one final thrust, he pulled out and sent streaks of cum across your belly. You reached for his cock to jerk it off, making him groan due to overstimulation. After he was done, he hovered there for a few seconds and then fell on a heap on top of you.
“Wow,” he rasped, panting.
“Yeah,” you breathed, immensely weakened. "Wow."
The dream must have been a premonition. Or it might be the manifestation of the pent-up tension between you all day. Either way, it didn’t matter. What mattered was this moment, right now. The figment of your imagination could never compare to the real thing. It was everything you’d ever imagined, so much better even.
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Vernon was gone before daybreak after you sent him away. He had been sleeping soundly next to you last night, warm and snuggly. But you woke him up barely four hours later and asked him to leave. You asked nicely, of course, and he was very understanding of your reasons. As beautiful as it was, you both agreed to keep the whole thing a secret for now. So, you sent him away to ensure your mother wouldn’t see him in the morning or that your friends wouldn’t wonder where he was.
It bothered you how quickly you got into this relationship with Vernon, especially because you knew it didn’t stem from sincere feelings but rather from infatuation and sexual tension. You also didn’t want to be the subject of your friends’ relentless teasing for the whole duration of their stay. How would you explain that you were suddenly sleeping with the guy you said you had zero interest in?
You had been staring at the ceiling for over an hour now, reliving the events of last night and wondering what the next few days had in store for the two of you. You needed not to remind yourself that this was all but a convenient setup. No strings had been attached to this yet, as far as your spoken declarations were concerned. With that in mind, you drifted back to sleep, tired from last night’s excursions.
The late morning sun filtered through your curtains, and the cool wind embraced your naked arms. You woke up again, feeling the emptiness beside you where Vernon had been. It was a strange feeling, missing someone who had just been a friend until recently. The physical connection you shared last night had stirred up emotions you hadn't anticipated.
As you got ready for the day, your thoughts drifted back to Vernon. You couldn't deny the chemistry between you two, but the uncertainty of where this was headed made you uneasy. The thought of facing your friends and pretending nothing had changed was daunting but necessary. You couldn't let them suspect anything, at least not yet.
Downstairs, your mother was on her knees, scanning the papers she had strategically scattered on the floor and on the couches in the living room. She was mumbling to herself, the deep scowl on her face indicating her intense concentration. It is best not to disturb her when she is busy like this, so you slip quietly out of the house, taking your old car out of the garage and heading to Jade’s.
When you got there, the house was already buzzing with activity. Your friends were lounging in the living room, chatting and laughing. You joined them, trying to act as normal as possible.
“Look who decided to turn up,” Jade teased, waving. "You missed breakfast."
"Sorry, I was really tired," you replied, forcing a smile as you sat down.
Mingyu glanced at you with a knowing look, but he didn't say anything. You wondered if he had noticed anything unusual about Vernon this morning.
“What's the plan for today?” you asked, eager to divert attention from yourself.
“Beach volleyball!” Jaehyun announced enthusiastically. “Elise invited us to join them at the beach.”
“Cool. Can we make s’mores after?” Trina requested. “That is if there isn’t a bonfire party after the game.”
Jade nodded. “There isn’t, so yes, we can make smores.”
Everyone cheered at the idea, and you couldn't help but feel a bit relieved. Activities like these would keep everyone occupied and less likely to notice any changes between you and Vernon.
As the day went on, you found yourself stealing glances at Vernon, who seemed just as composed as ever. The physical distance between you in public was a stark contrast to the intimacy you had shared last night. It was a balancing act, maintaining the facade while grappling with your own feelings.
During volleyball, you and Vernon ended up on opposing teams, and your competitive sides came out in full force. Since this was a game held by your high school friends, Winwin was there too and got on the same team as you. In a quick battle of wits, Jade boasted about you and Winwin being the best beach volleyball duo, making everyone cheer and tease. The game was filled with laughter, teasing, and a few surprisingly intense moments.
“You're pretty good,” Vernon said, panting and grinning as you both took a break.
“I could say the same about you,” you replied, wiping sweat from your forehead. That was your first conversation ever since he left your house that morning.
Later in the afternoon, while everyone was busy setting up for the bonfire, Vernon found a chance to be alone with you. He casually asked you to help him get the marshmallows from the kitchen, and you obliged. As you looked for the bag of marshmallows, Vernon sneakily closed the pantry door.
“You gotta be kidding me,” you muttered.
“Come on. Forget the mallows for a sec,” he grinned, tugging you by the waist.
Vernon scooped your cheek to kiss you, and you happily kissed him back, wrapping your arms around his neck. There was a sense of relief mixed in the euphoria of kissing Vernon, as if you had been starved of his touch for years instead of mere hours. You melted in his arms, delirious because of his kiss. When you parted, your lips ached for him, but you didn’t indulge it.
“Can I see you tonight?” he asked, looking ecstatic.
Absolutely, you screamed in your head but you wanted to play hard-to-get. “I’ll think about it,” you replied.
“Okay. Let me know.”
He kissed you once more, and then another. And even as you were leaving the pantry, he stole kisses on your cheek, stopping only when you were almost outside the house where all your friends are gathered.
The next few days were a whirlwind of activities and stolen moments. You and Vernon navigated your secret relationship with a mix of excitement and caution. Every touch, every shared glance held a thrill of secrecy that only the two of you understood. Vernon has mastered the art of sneaking to your house, undetected. And you would be in each other’s arms all night, only to act like you barely knew each other the next day.
One morning, the group decided to go kayaking. You went to a water sports resort with your friends, excited about the activities you haven’t done in a long time. The clear blue waters of the bay called to you, and it was like you were rediscovering its beauty after spending most of your life living here.
“Are you sure you don’t want to go?” Jade asked Trina again, who shook her head in response.
“Have fun, babe,” she told Minghao who then joined Mingyu on the kayak. “Take care of my Haohao, alright?” 
You scoffed as you were strapping your life vest. “Wrong. Minghao should take care of Mingyu. Chances of falling off the kayak and drowning is higher for that giant himbo.”
Eunwoo laughed as he was helping you with the gear. Patting the back of your life vest, he said, “There. You’re all set.”
“Thanks,” you lilted, looking at the array of kayaks by the shore. “Which one is ours?”
“Huh? Oh, I’m going with Adie.”
You gawked at him and then glanced over your shoulders at Adie who was chatting with Jade. “With Adie?”
“Yeah. It sort of just… happened. I could go with you instead, if you want,” he offered but you shook your hands.
“No, it’s okay. You can go with her. I don’t think she knows how to kayak so she’ll need someone who does.”
Eunwoo looked apologetic, but he just nodded and looked around. “So, you wouldn’t mind going with Vernon?”
You paused, surprised. Then your eyes searched the vicinity for Vernon. He was talking to a resort staff with Jaehyun and he smiled at you when he caught you looking.
It makes sense, of course. Eunwoo and Adie are going out together. Jade pairing up with her boyfriend is a given. So that leaves you and Vernon.
“Yeah. I don’t see why I would,” you replied.
You paired up with Vernon, both of you concealing your satisfaction with how things turned out. You pushed off from the shore, your kayak gliding smoothly over the water. The others spread out, their laughter and shouts echoing across the bay. 
“So, do you kayak often?” Vernon asked, his voice carrying over the gentle lapping of the waves.
“Not as often as I'd like,” you admitted. 
“Living here, with this magnificent bay and all, I assumed you would be out on the water every day,” he commented.
“Well, I did have a phase where I can’t seem to get enough of the sea,” you reminisced. “But that was when I was like, sixteen or seventeen. Now I barely come out here, especially since I’m away for college most of the time.”
Vernon nodded. “I get that. Sometimes we take the beautiful things around us for granted because they’re always there.”
You paddled in comfortable silence for a while, enjoying the serene beauty of the bay. The water was clear, allowing you to see the underwater world teeming with life beneath you. Schools of fish darted around, and you even spotted a few crabs scuttling along the sandy bottom.
“Hey, want to head over to that little cove?” Vernon pointed to a secluded spot where the trees leaned over the water, creating a shaded area perfect for a break.
“Sure,” you agreed, steering your kayak in that direction.
As you approached the cove, the sounds of your friends grew distant, replaced by the soothing rustle of leaves and the occasional call of a seabird. You both pulled your kayak up onto a small, sandy beach and took a seat on a fallen log.
“This is nice,” you said, taking a deep breath of the salty air. You leaned back, propping yourself up on your hands. “You know, this whole secret relationship thing... it’s kind of fun.”
Vernon grinned. “Yeah? I was worried it might be too much stress.”
You shook your head. “It has its moments, but there’s something exciting about it.”
He reached out, taking your hand in his. “I like that. But I don’t want it to be stressful for you. If it ever gets too much, just tell me, okay?”
“Okay,” you promised, squeezing his hand.
For a moment, you both just sat there, holding hands and listening to the gentle sounds of nature. It was a rare, peaceful moment amid the whirlwind that had become your summer.
“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Vernon said out of nowhere.
You glanced at him curiously and upon recognizing the mischief on his face, you shook your head. “Don’t even think about it.”
Vernon threw his head back laughing. “Pretty hard not to. With you in that gorgeous two-piece and all.”
“Have some decency, Vernon. I’ve been thinking about giving you a head all day but I didn’t because we’re out in public.”
The shock made Vernon inhale sharply, cover his mouth, and look away. You just scowled at him, confused at his overreaction. When he glanced back at you, his eyes were bulging out of their sockets. You raised an eyebrow so he cleared his throat and composed himself.
“You can’t say things like that out loud!” he chided softly, shaking his head.
You scoffed. “I’m sure whatever you have in your mind is far more scandalous.”
Vernon smiled playfully. “Oh, so you wanna hear what I think?”
“No,” you declared, crossing your arms over your chest and reverting your gaze to the sea.
“I could just pull your bikini bottoms to the side. No one will notice.”
“Hansol Vernon Chwe!” you exclaimed, slapping his arm. You were right, he was thinking far more scandalous thoughts! “Your mind is in the gutter.”
“So what? My mind likes it there.”
“Unbelievable,” you muttered, standing up at once. Grabbing his hand, you pulled him up and led him further into the cove.
“Can’t we just—” 
You cut him off with an urgent kiss, clutching a handful of his hair as you kept his head at an angle. Vernon wasted no time, locking your waist in his arms and kissing you with sweet abandon. You made out with him for a couple minutes, stopping immediately when he started grinding his crotch against you.
“Aw,” he whined, shoulders sagging as he watched you walk away from him and back to the shore like nothing happened.
Just in time, the sound of voices carried over the water, signaling the return of your friends. 
“Let’s head back,” you called out to Vernon who was walking to you with a grumpy pout. You couldn’t help the grin that formed on your lips, pleased with his reaction.
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You woke up to the sound of birds calling from a distance and the weight of an arm around your waist. A smile crept upon your lips as you snuggled closer to the warmth radiating from behind you. Your movements caused Vernon to stir, groaning as he pulled you closer and nuzzled his face behind your neck.
“Good morning,” he whispered, his voice deep and throaty. You felt a soft peck on your shoulder as you uttered the same greeting. “Is it time to go?”
You shook your head lazily, turning to face him. An affectionate kiss on your forehead had you reeling in bliss. Vernon’s forehead was creased, but he didn't look annoyed, rather pleased with his eyes still closed and cheeks bloated from sleep.
“Later,” you replied and saw him nodding.
He took a long breath and locked your head in his arms. “Good idea.”
You laughingly hit his arm so he'd let you go, but Vernon squeezed tighter, just tight enough so you wouldn't choke. As you struggled to let loose, your phone started buzzing on the nightstand, so you reached to grab it, only to be dragged back by him.
“Stop! I gotta take it!” you giggled, and he eventually let go. You bolted right up when you saw Jade’s message on the screen, and your surprised action completely woke Vernon.
“What? What's wrong? What happened?” he asked, blinking at the bright sunlight pouring into the room.
“Jade’s coming.”
“Oh,” he blurted monotonously, scratching his chin. I have to go, don't I?"
"Yeah. Go,” you told him, patting his shoulder repeatedly. Vernon rose to his feet, picking up his stuff on the chair while you answered Jade’s call.
"Hey, are you up?" came your friend's voice from the other line.
"No," you replied sarcastically, rolling your eyes.
"Good. Jaehyun and I are on our way."
"Uh, yeah. Okay. How long before you get here?" you questioned. Vernon was quietly asking where his jacket was, so you pointed at your desk. "You think you could pick up hot chocolate for me at Poppy’s?"
"Already on it," replied Jade. "Be there in 15."
Jade hung up after you said your goodbyes, and you jumped off your bed to see Vernon off. He wrapped you in his embrace, warm and snug. You inhaled his scent, reluctant to let him go.
“I'll see you later?” he asked, kissing the tip of your nose.
“Later,” you nodded. One more kiss and Vernon left your house, waving happily. You sighed after closing your door, wondering how much longer you could keep this a secret from your friends, especially from Jade, who had always been interested in your love life. She would have wanted to know about this before anyone else.
Should you tell her? Maybe she'll get off your case and stop setting you up with guys. Honestly, there was no reason to keep this a secret, except for the fact that Vernon is relatively new and everything happened too quickly between you.
You were stepping out of the bathroom when your doorbell rang. You peered outside the window and signaled for them to come in before running back to your bedroom to get changed. Jade’s cheerful ‘good morning’ greeted you, followed by a kiss on your cheek. Jaehyun asked you how your sleep was as he handed you the hot chocolate you asked them to pick up.
“So, tell me why you left your guests back at your house to have breakfast here with me?” you asked Jade as you both sat by the kitchen island, watching Jaehyun flip pancakes.
“Meh. They’re all busy doing their own thing. When I asked who wanted to come with us here, they all said no.”
“Eunwoo too?”
Jade shrugged. “Eunwoo hasn’t come out of his room, so he was probably still asleep. Vernon too, I guess. I haven’t seen them leave their room yet.”
You cleared your throat, suddenly feeling uneasy. “I see.”
“We’re leaving at noon,” she said after checking a message on her phone. “Are you ready?”
“I am,” you replied. You were invited by Elise to a camping trip, which you know would be fun so you all agreed to go. 
You and Vernon talked about it. He wasn’t as excited, saying he was tired and wanted to just stay in.
“Can we just stay here so I can fuck your brains out?” he had asked you the night before.
“My, my, how romantic,” you had told him sarcastically, rolling your eyes. “But if we do, everyone’s gonna know.”
After breakfast, Elise arrived with Winwin to pick you up. With your group of five people, you went to buy essentials for the camping trip: food, booze, and other materials. It was almost noon by the time you were done, so to save time, you picked up your stuff from the house and went straight to the meeting place where everyone was waiting.
“Did you get everything?” one friend asked as you were getting out of Winwin’s car.
You were surprised when you found your group to be smaller than expected. Other than you and your friends from uni, there were only six other people from your high school. Elise and Winwin were there, as expected. The other four are old classmates, including Mina, a girl Mingyu had been hanging out with ever since he got here.
In three SUV cars, you set off from the bay to a campsite that they had picked out. It was rowdy and you could already imagine how the weekend would go.
“Chips?” you asked Eunwoo, offering him a chip while he drove.
“Thanks,” he said, beaming and accepting the food with his mouth without taking his eyes off the road.
Mingyu’s head peeked at you from between the seats. He was pouting so you rolled your eyes at him and fed him some chips too.
“See, she loves me too,” Mingyu chimed, sitting back.
“She doesn't. You're just annoying and she puts up with you just to shut you up,” Adie sneered.
“You're just jealous because no one loves you like y/n does me.”
You heard Adie scoff. “Does your girlfriend know you're simping over y/n?”
“You know I don't have a girlfriend,” Mingyu replied indignantly.
“Exactly.”
Your gaze met Eunwoo's for a second before you both laughed at Mingyu’s misery. They continued to bicker along the way. 
Traveling always makes you sleepy, which is why you're the least fun person to be with on a road trip. This time, of course, you fell asleep barely an hour into the trip, waking up only when Eunwoo gently shook you.
“We're here,” he sang, eyes twinkling as he smiled at you. You smiled back, thanking him before stretching your limbs.
“Where is here, exactly?” you asked, handing his jacket back to him.
“Honestly, no idea. It's my first time here too,” he replied as he wore his jacket.
When you got out of the car, you recognized the campsite you frequented with your high school friends. Once a year, you all would come up here for some fresh air and to hike by yourselves. The air was colder, probably because you're up the mountains but the view was majestic enough to ignore the chill. The lake sat magnificently a few feet from where you stood and although the skies weren't particularly clear, it was still a sight to behold.
“Don't we need to unload our stuff first?” Eunwoo asked, shuddering as he hugged you from behind and trapped you inside his jacket.
You basked in the warmth but then caught Vernon’s gaze from where their car was parked. Casually, you slipped away from Eunwoo's arms. “There's no need. The tents are already furnished. You can crash as soon as you get there.”
“Have you been here before?”
“Yeah, we came here a lot when we were in high school.”
“Hey, Cha Eunwoo!” Jade's voice made you laugh. “I told you not to hog my best friend!”
Jade yanked you away from Eunwoo, hugging you tightly as if shielding you away from the man.
“She's my best friend too!” Eunwoo argued.
In a lower voice, Jade scolded him. “I know, but right now, you're ruining her chances at love.”
“Love?” you frowned but Jade was already dragging you away.
“Go help make food or something!” Jade told Eunwoo and you laughingly waved at him as you were getting dragged away.
“What do you mean by love?” you asked but she shushed you and discreetly pointed at the third car. Winwin was standing by it, unloading the stuff from the trunk.
“Uh… nope.”
“Why not?”
“He’s my ex.”
“Duh? I know,” she replied, rolling her eyes. Then she poked at your sides teasingly. “But I’ve seen how you’ve been spending some time with him these days. You seemed to have fun together. Why not give it another chance?”
“Oh, Jade,” you sighed. If only she knew which guy you had been spending all your free time with.
Barbecue was on the menu. While you helped prepare the food, the others were already starting the party with some music and booze. This mountain resort is a popular spot, but it’s summer, and most people are at the beach so your group is the only one present which was nice because you have the place all to yourselves. You chatted with Jaehyun and Winwin as you prepped, laughing at their jokes and playful banter. Vernon was there too, but he kept his distance and didn't speak to you.
“Need help with that?” you glanced sideways at the guy who crouched next to you by the cooler. It was Winwin and he smiled as he helped you put cans of soda and beer into the cooler.
“Not really, but thanks,” you replied. You and Winwin had indeed been chatting a lot whenever you were hanging out with them. But it’s all for the sake of friendship and the bond you used to have, nothing to suggest any romantic pursuits. You found these chats fun and interesting too, and you hoped that no one would make a big deal out of it. But after what Jade told you a while ago, you were starting to think everyone else might be misunderstanding your friendship.
“Hey, man,” came Vernon's voice from behind you that almost made you gasp. “Jaehyun’s calling you at the barbecue.”
Winwin stood up, smiling at you before running back to where he was being called. Vernon crouched down next to you, beaming as he helped with the remaining drinks.
“How was your sleep?” he asked, inching a little closer.
“My sleep?” you questioned, puzzled. “Did you see me sleeping in the car?”
He nodded. “Yeah. You were so cute with your mouth open.”
You felt your face flare and resisted the urge to swat him. “Not funny.”
“I didn't say it was funny,” he chuckled, clearly enjoying your embarrassment. “I said you were cute.”
“Yeah, yeah,” you muttered, rolling your eyes before standing up. Vernon followed, carrying the cooler.
“Where do we put this?” he asked and you pointed to the direction of the dining area by the bonfire. You walked there together, chatting casually along the way before Jaehyun called you over to where they were preparing the other foods.
“Wait,” Vernon grabbed your wrist as you were about to walk away. You glanced at it and then at your friends who were waiting for you. Vernon instinctively released your hand. “Nevermind. Go ahead.”
For the rest of the afternoon, and through the night, you had fun with your friends, goofing around and reliving the memories of your teenage years. Games were present too, and drinks. Lots of drinks. 
However, there was a tension simmering under the surface, something you couldn't quite put your finger on.
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Vernon has a feeling that today wasn’t his day. It started as soon as he left your house. On his way back to Jade’s, the neighbor’s dogs chased after him. In the two weeks that he has stayed here, those dogs had never shown any aggression towards him until today. He initially thought that was it, but when he was taking a shower, he slipped on the tiles and landed on his butt. Although it didn’t cause any real damage, it was still irritating.
And when it was time for them to leave, he wanted to be in the same car as you. But Jaehyun asked him to drive and he couldn’t decline. He wanted to, but he couldn’t possibly tell his friend that he didn’t want to drive because he wanted to be in the same car as you were. 
Well, he could. He just chose not to out of respect for your wishes to keep things quiet.
So he settled with the small joy of seeing you sleep on the passenger seat, looking cute with your mouth hanging open. It was so adorable he almost asked to get out of the car so he could go pinch your cheeks.
Then when you reached the campsite, Eunwoo was all over you and Jade said something about setting you up with your ex. Vernon heard that, of course. He doesn’t get it though. Why would you want to get back with an ex from a long time ago?
The rest of the afternoon unfolded with lots of activities. The air was filled with laughter, the crackle of the bonfire, and the smell of barbecue. As the sun dipped below the horizon, the party atmosphere grew even more vibrant.
Vernon watched you from a distance, his eyes tracking your every move. He tried to find a moment alone with you, but it seemed impossible. Winwin was always nearby, and you two were frequently seen laughing and chatting. Your bond from high school was so evident, that one would think you didn’t stop contacting each other all those years ago. Then there was Eunwoo, who had always been affectionate and clingy towards you, but Vernon couldn’t seem to shake off his ire towards your best friend.
Eunwoo draped an arm around your shoulders as you all watched the sunset. “This view is amazing, right?” he told you.
“Absolutely,” you replied, leaning into him slightly. You caught Vernon's eye for a split second, but he looked away, pretending to be engrossed in his phone.
“Y/n, let’s go get refills,” Winwin suggested, pulling you away from Eunwoo. You laughed, giving Eunwoo a light shove as you followed Winwin to the cooler.
Vernon seized this moment and approached you both, hoping to finally get a word in. “Hey, need any help?” he asked, trying to keep his tone casual.
“Nah, we're good!” Winwin replied cheerfully, handing you the cans while you loaded them into the ice bucket. “Thanks though, man.”
You glanced briefly at him and smiled. Vernon clenched his jaw, forcing a smile. “Sure, anytime.”
He lingered for a moment, hoping Winwin would leave, but instead, Winwin started telling you a funny story about your high school days, making you laugh so hard you nearly spilled your drink.
Vernon could feel his patience wearing thin. Every time he tried to get close to you, someone else was already there, monopolizing your attention. He attempted to interject himself into your conversations, but it always felt forced and awkward.
Later, as everyone gathered around the bonfire, Vernon saw another opportunity. He moved to sit next to you, but Eunwoo beat him to it, practically pulling you into his lap.
“Hey, scoot over,” Vernon said, his voice tinged with frustration.
“There’s plenty of room,” Eunwoo replied cheerfully, oblivious to Vernon’s irritation.
Vernon sat down on the other side of you, but the moment was already spoiled. Jaehyun started playing the guitar, and everyone began to sing along, further distancing you from Vernon.
Finally, after what felt like the hundredth interruption, Vernon had had enough. He retreated to the edge of the campsite, crossing his arms and staring moodily into the darkness. His grumpy demeanor didn't go unnoticed.
Mingyu wandered over, a concerned look on his face. “You alright, man?”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” Vernon replied curtly.
“You don’t look fine,” Mingyu pointed out. “What’s up?”
Vernon sighed, running a hand through his hair. “It’s just... hard to get a moment with her, you know?”
Unbeknownst to you, Mingyu knew about you and Vernon. No one told him, he just figured it out by himself on the very first night that Vernon slept in your house. They were roommates first before Vernon moved to Eunwoo’s room because Mingyu kept bringing Mina over. When Vernon didn’t come home that night, Mingyu knew something good had happened to him. After all, the very reason Vernon was willing to come to Azure Bay in the first place was you. 
Why would Vernon sacrifice a peaceful summer break spent with his family to join a group of friends that he barely knew in a state he had never been to before? It was all because of you. Mingyu knew about this little crush and decided to give his friend this one and only opportunity.
Mingyu glanced back at you, surrounded by your friends. “Yeah, she’s pretty popular,” he said with a chuckle. “Just give it time. We’re here all weekend.”
Vernon nodded, but his mood didn’t improve. He spent the rest of the evening brooding, feeling more and more isolated as the party continued without him. Every time he saw you laughing with someone else, it was like a punch to the gut. Today really wasn’t his day.
Eventually, you noticed the change in his mood. When the party died down and everyone retreated to their tents, you and Vernon were left in front of the bonfire. He was still looking grumpy, staring at the fire like it had done him a grave sin.
“Hey, you okay?” you asked softly when you approached him.
Vernon forced a smile. “Yeah, just needed some air.”
You looked unconvinced but didn’t push. “It’s getting cold. We shouldn’t stay out here for too long.”
“Right. Bye then,” he replied coldly, standing up at once and heading to one of the tents.
You froze on the spot, dumbfounded and bewildered at the attitude he was giving you. You told him that hoping he’d ask to be alone with you, then you’d invite him to your tent. Did he ignore you on purpose or was he really clueless about your cue? 
You decided not to pester him about it. Feeling hurt, you walked back into your own tent, got ready to sleep, and curled up under the sheets.
“The fuck was his problem?” you asked yourself, scowling deeply as you scrolled through your phone.
You were annoyed and deeply hurt. You even made sure not to share a tent with someone else because you thought you could be alone with him. Now, what’s the point?
“So annoying,” you muttered when you saw his Instagram story about the campsite.
You were just about to toss your phone away when you noticed something in his story. It was not just a picture of the lake. You were in it too. Initially, you thought the silhouette was of someone else’s. But you recognized yourself, and the bun sitting on top of your head all day.
Your face lit up with a smile that you couldn’t conceal. Whether it was on purpose or not, your heart fluttered seeing that on his page. As if on cue, a message from Vernon popped up on your screen.
Vernon: I was a dick. I’m sorry.
You sighed, turning on your back and typing a reply.
You: Was it easier to act like a dick than to tell me what was wrong? Vernon: I guess Vernon: Meet me outside?
You grinned, giddiness bubbling inside you.
You: Is outside better than here in my tent?
You waited for his response but about three minutes later, you heard his voice outside your tent. Excited, you rose to open up for him. Big eyes, a hood over his head, and a big gummy smile welcomed you.
“Is it okay to come in?” he asked before you could even say anything.
You giggled, unable to resist his cuteness. “Yeah. Come on in.”
“Are you sure? What if someone sees us?”
“Someone will if you keep standing there.”
Vernon comes in at once, leaving his shoes outside. Not wasting a second, Vernon pulled you into a tight hug.
“I've been waiting on you all day,” he murmured, his breath hot against your ear.
“What do you mean? I was here the whole time.”
Vernon sighed, burying his face on the crook of your neck. “Should we just tell everyone? Watching guys hover around you like bees on a flower is not entertaining at all.”
You chuckled heartily. “My, my. Is Vernon being jealous right now?” you teased but when Vernon didn’t laugh or say anything to deflect you, you realized you were right. “Are you serious?”
He didn’t respond and just sighed against your skin. You shoved him a little, making him sit properly and face you.
“Vernon,” you prompted, stern.
“So what if I am?” he grumbled, scowling deeply. “These guys are all over you.”
You grinned, flattered. “They’re my friends.”
“I know. But I can’t help myself, can I?” he sighed, touching your face. “Everyone loves you, it was so hard to get your attention. I can’t even get a word in.”
“Aww,” you lilted, enamored by him. You touched his face too and kissed the tip of his nose. “We’re alone now. My attention is not going anywhere.”
He leaned in, capturing your lips in a slow, deliberate kiss that made your heart race. You responded eagerly, your hands tangling in his hair as you pressed closer to him.
There was no need to discuss anything. You just went with the flow, letting Vernon take you where he wanted to. He laid you down with care and gently kissed your lips. You touched his face, feeling the warmth of his skin and indulging yourself.
“Is this mine?” he whispered when you parted, making butterflies run wild in your belly.
Your brows furrowed slightly, confused but giddy at the same time. “What does that even mean?”
“I just want to know if it is.” He took the hand you were using to touch his face and then kissed it. “Mine.”
Then he leaned to kiss your cheek. “Mine.”
The puzzled look on your face remained. “Speak properly, Vernon.”
“It’s Hansol.”
“Huh?”
He kissed your hand again and placed it on his face. “I’m all yours, love. I’m surrendering myself to you. So please, it’s Hansol.”
“Hansol…” you echoed, voice trailing off when he ducked to kiss your neck. It didn’t take long for desire to cloud your mind. His touch was as good as it was the first time. No, actually, he got better the more you did it with him. It was as if he was studying you each time you let him touch you, and little by little, he was starting to memorize you.
His kisses went lower, and lower as he expertly undressed you. With each kiss, he said, ‘Mine’. Your neck, your collarbone, the space between your breasts, and the area above your belly button, your hip, your inner thighs— he marked all of it, calling them his.
“Tell me, y/n,” Vernon questioned, his voice deep and raspy. “Are you mine?”
“All yours,” you gasped, aching to be touched where he was refusing to touch you.
“All mine?”
“Yes, Hansol,” you replied, biting your lips. “All yours.” 
“Good girl.” You flinched when his nose pressed on your underwear, putting pressure on the sex underneath it. He kissed that too. “All mine.”
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The nights you spent together became more frequent, each one blurring the line between physical attraction and emotional connection. As the days went on, you couldn't help but notice the little things about Vernon that made your heart flutter. The way he laughed, the way he looked at you when he thought you weren't paying attention, the way he made you feel like you were the only person in the world when you were together. You tried to remind yourself that this was supposed to be a no-strings-attached arrangement, but your heart was beginning to have other ideas.
Especially considering how things are going between you right now. After the hiking trip, Vernon told you he would stop resisting the urge to approach you, even with your friends present. You told him to do as he liked, finally allowing things to unfold naturally. It was a liberating decision, knowing you will no longer have to walk on eggshells and keep pretending Vernon is just another friend.
As the days passed, you and Vernon fell into a comfortable routine. Mornings often began with leisurely breakfasts at Jade’s house or on your patio, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee blending with the salty sea breeze. The group would often split up for various activities—some would go hiking along the coastal trails, some would prefer to shop or sight-see, while others, like you and Vernon, preferred the relaxation of the beach.
One night, after another secret rendezvous, you lay in bed, staring at the ceiling and replaying every moment with Vernon. You hated the idea of temporary relationships, the kind that only lasted for a season and then fizzled out. But the thought of losing what you had with Vernon was starting to feel unbearable.
“Get it together, y/n,” you muttered to yourself, trying to push the feelings away. But deep down, you knew it was already too late. You were falling for him, and there was no turning back.
The next day, you went out with Vernon to go sightseeing. Wandering through narrow streets lined with quaint shops and cafes, you found yourselves in a small art gallery. The cool interior was a welcome respite from the heat, and you both wandered among the paintings, discussing your favorites and discovering new aspects of each other's personalities.
“I didn't know you were into abstract art,” Vernon said, stopping in front of a vibrant canvas.
You shrugged, smiling. “Oh, I’m not. I just like to stare at it like it’s a compelling puzzle.”
“A compelling puzzle?” he repeated.
“Yeah,” you grinned. “Whenever I see one, I try to decode any message or find the hidden figures. But visually, I wouldn't buy one and put it on display.”
He nodded thoughtfully, taking your hand as you moved to the next exhibit. The simple gesture of holding hands felt natural, and it sent a thrill through you every time.
Later, as you sat in a cozy café, sipping iced lattes and watching the world go by, Vernon brought up a topic that had been on your mind as well.
“I've been thinking about what you said, about not wanting this to be just a summer fling,” he began, stirring his drink absentmindedly. “And I think I agree. I’m still not sure what it would mean for us, though.”
You looked at him, grateful for his honesty. “It means being realistic about what we want and what we're willing to do to make it work.”
He reached across the table, taking your hand in his. “I'm willing to try if you are.”
You smiled, squeezing his hand. “One step at a time, Hansol.”
He grinned, a spark of determination in his eyes. “One step at a time.”
Back at the beach house, the evenings were filled with laughter and conversations as usual. Despite your efforts to keep things low-key, your friends began to notice the growing closeness between you and Vernon. 
As you sat around the bonfire, Adie couldn't help but tease you. “So y/n, Vernon seems to be spending a lot of time with you. Anything you want to tell us?”
You felt your cheeks flush and shot Vernon a quick glance. He smiled reassuringly but you didn’t know what it meant. So you responded with, “We're just enjoying each other's company. No need to make it a big deal.”
Your friends laughed and let the topic drop, but you could tell they weren't entirely convinced. As the night wore on, you found yourself snuggled up next to Vernon, the warmth of the fire and the comfort of his presence making you feel at ease.
Vernon offered to walk you home that night, ignoring the teasing from your friends. Hand in hand, you trekked the sidewalk while talking and laughing about random things. When you reached the house, you invited him inside, asking if he wanted to sleep over.
“Have I ever said no to that?” Vernon asked, the glimmer in his irresistibly beautiful.
“Alright. Come on in then,” you chuckled. 
When you entered the house, you found your mom’s designs on the floor again, making you feel nervous. She should be asleep by now, but judging by this, it looks like she’s pulling an all-nighter. You looked around to find her, and when you couldn’t, you assumed she had gone to sleep so you ushered Vernon in.
“Watch your step. These are Mom’s designs. She said she gets more efficient when she can compare and contrast her works like this. It looks like a mess, but it’s not all clutter,” you explained, treading carefully. “That’s just how she works.”
“I see. You take after her then,” Vernon chuckled, letting you guide him across the room to the staircase. 
“I get that all the time from family and friends,” you replied, reminiscing.
“If you don’t mind me asking, is your dad around? I haven’t really seen him.”
You were surprised by the question, but you didn’t mind answering it. “Oh, they’re not together anymore. They got divorced when I was fourteen.”
Vernon’s face dropped. “Sorry to hear that.”
“No, it’s okay. We’re not on bad terms. I see him sometimes when I visit him in France.”
“That’s far.”
“I know,” you chuckled as you reached for your bedroom door. Before you could open it, however, the door to your mom’s room opened, and she flicked the lights on instantly. “Mom!” you exclaimed.
Getting caught by your mother as you were bringing a guy home? Embarrassing. 
Your mother stared at you and Vernon for a minute before speaking. “Vernon, was it?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
She hummed in acknowledgment. “I guess everything’s going well between you, seeing how you’re walking in through the front door this time instead of the back.”
You gasped loudly. “Mom! How did you even know that?”
She just smiled coyly, not saying anything as she walked down the stairs to go back to her work.
“Does that mean she’s known the whole time?” Vernon asked, his eyes wide with surprise.
You sighed, feeling a mix of embarrassment and relief. “Apparently. Moms always know more than they let on.”
Vernon laughed softly as you entered your bedroom. “I think it went well, all things considered. She didn't seem mad or anything.”
“Yeah,” you agreed, walking over to your bed and sitting down. “She's pretty cool about stuff like this. I just didn't expect her to know about us sneaking around.”
Vernon sat beside you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “At least we don't have to hide anymore,” he said gently.
You smiled, resting your head on his shoulder. "Yeah, that's a relief."
The two of you sat in comfortable silence for a moment, your head leaning on your chest as you listened to the sound of his heart and enjoyed the peace and quiet of your room.
“So,” he began, breaking the silence, “What do you want to do now?”
You shrugged. “I don’t know. Movie? We could watch something and just relax.”
Vernon grinned. “Sounds perfect.”
You stood up and went to your small collection of DVDs and streaming options, picking out a movie you both liked. Vernon made himself comfortable on your bed, and you joined him once the movie was ready to start. Snuggling up under the blankets, you hit play, and the room was soon filled with the familiar sounds of your favorite film.
As the movie played, you felt a sense of contentment wash over you. Vernon’s presence beside you was comforting, and you were grateful for the way things were unfolding. His hand found yours under the blanket, and he gave it a gentle squeeze. You smiled, squeezing back.
Halfway through, you felt yourself growing drowsy. Vernon’s arm around you was warm and secure, and you found it hard to keep your eyes open. Before you knew it, you had drifted off to sleep, the movie still playing softly in the background.
Vernon watched you for a moment, a fond smile on his face. He gently kissed your forehead before settling down beside you, pulling the blanket up to keep you both warm. As he drifted off to sleep, he felt a sense of contentment he hadn’t felt in a long time.
The next morning, you woke up to the sound of birds chirping outside your window. You blinked your eyes open, realizing you were still curled up next to Vernon. He was already awake, watching you with a soft smile.
“Morning,” you mumbled, stretching.
“Morning,” he replied, brushing a strand of hair from your face. “Sleep well?”
“Yeah, really well,” you said, sitting up and rubbing your eyes. “You?”
“Best sleep I’ve had in a while,” he admitted.
You smiled, feeling your heart swell with affection for him. “I’m glad.”
Today is an uneventful day, like most days. You have nothing planned and you intend to just lounge about all day. Vernon seemed to like the idea, so after driving your mom to the airport for a business trip, you ordered takeout breakfasts and went back to your house.
You laid out the food on the coffee table in the living room, and the two of you sat cross-legged on the floor, chatting softly as you ate.
"How's the croissant?" you asked, tearing off a piece of your own pastry and popping it into your mouth.
"It's amazing," Vernon replied with a grin, crumbs dusting the corner of his lips. "Want a bite?" He held out his half-eaten croissant, and you leaned forward to take a bite, savoring the buttery, flaky goodness.
"Delicious," you mumbled, your mouth full. He laughed, shaking his head affectionately.
After breakfast, you cleaned up together, moving in sync as you cleared the table and washed the dishes. The kitchen was filled with the sound of running water and the clinking of plates, but it felt peaceful, even meditative.
With the kitchen clean, you both moved to the living room. Vernon sprawled out on the couch, and you settled beside him, your head resting on his chest. He absently ran his fingers through your hair creating a soothing rhythm.
You reached for your book on the coffee table and Vernon grabbed his phone, each of you sinking into your own world. The living room was quiet except for the occasional sound of turning pages and the soft taps from Vernon's phone.
The silence was comfortable, the kind that envelops you like a warm blanket. You glanced up occasionally, stealing glances at Vernon, who seemed engrossed in whatever he was looking at. He'd sometimes smile at something on his screen, and you couldn't help but feel content seeing him so relaxed.
After a while, Vernon shifted, placing his phone down. "What are you reading?" he asked softly, not wanting to break the tranquility of the moment.
"Just something I should have finished reading a long time ago," you replied, showing him the cover. "It's pretty interesting."
"What's it about?" he asked, genuinely curious.
You gave him a brief summary, and he listened attentively, his eyes on you the whole time. "Sounds good. Maybe I'll borrow it when you're done," he said with a smile.
"Sure," you nodded, going back to your book while he picked up his phone again.
The afternoon sun streamed through the windows, casting a warm glow over the room. Time seemed to slow down as you both lost yourselves in your respective activities, yet remained deeply aware of each other's presence. Strangely, it felt intimate, and you took it as a testament to how comfortable you'd become with each other.
As the afternoon turned into evening, you both decided to cook dinner together. You made pasta, working seamlessly as a team. Vernon chopped vegetables while you prepared the sauce, and soon the kitchen was filled with the delicious aroma of your meal.
Over dinner, you talked about everything and nothing, sharing stories and dreams, and simply enjoying each other's company. When the meal was over, you did the dishes together, laughing and chatting as you worked.
The night ended with you both lying on the hammock on the patio, swaying gently as you watched the stars overhead and listened to the sounds of nature—the birds calling, crickets humming in the early evening, and the waves pushing and pulling at the shore. Vernon held you close, and you felt his steady heartbeat under your cheek.
“Today was perfect,” you whispered, feeling a wave of happiness wash over you.
“It really was,” he agreed, kissing the top of your head. “Let's have more days like this.”
“Absolutely,” you murmured, feeling completely at peace. But then you remembered a crucial detail that made your heart sink. “But you’re leaving in two days.”
Vernon hummed, confused. “Already?”
“Yes.”
The month passed too quickly for your liking. Ironically, when your friends were planning their stay, you initially thought staying here for a whole month was too long for them. Now that the time is almost up, you realize it wasn’t that long after all. Your relationship with Vernon aside, you had loved every moment spent with your friends—the parties, the bonfire sessions, showing them around town, introducing them to your old friends, and all that. You realized how much stronger your bond with them has become and now you dreaded the inevitable.
You especially dreaded seeing Vernon leave. Although your beginning was quite unconventional in your opinion, it blossomed into something beautiful. You didn’t want to lose it just yet. Your emotions for each other might be strong now, but it doesn’t change the fact that you still haven’t officially decided on the status of your relationship. Vernon was vague about it, but you took it in stride because it was better than nothing at all.
“I’m gonna miss Azure Bay,” he said, tightening his hold on you.
“I’m sure you’ll be missed around here too,” you chimed, closing your eyes in an attempt to push your worries away.
“Should I stay a bit longer?” he suggested, looking at you so you opened your eyes. “Or should we go back together? We could spend the rest of the summer at my home.”
You just scoffed. “As if.”
“Come on. It’s gonna be fun. We have a farm. It’s quite impressive,” he added, feeling proud.
“You’re serious?” you asked, unconvinced.
“Of course I am!” he said, grinning toothily.
You pondered for a moment, weighing the pros and cons of his offer. If he’s serious, then doesn’t this mean your relationship is official? He’s not the type to casually bring every girl he’s seeing to meet his family, right?
“I’ll think about it.”
Vernon seemed pleased, poking your nose before kissing you. As you kissed under the fading light, you felt a mixture of emotions—excitement, fear, hope. Things had been uncertain for a while now, but it’s starting to look up for you. Despite your initial reservations, you were starting to believe that this could be more than just a summer romance.
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The next morning, you woke up to the sound of waves crashing against the shore. You stretched and turned to find Vernon still asleep beside you, his face peaceful in the early morning light. You smiled, feeling a sense of contentment wash over you.
Determined to make the most of your remaining time together, you planned a surprise for Vernon. After breakfast, he had to go back to Jade’s house to take care of his belongings. While he was gone, you started working on your treat. You made sandwiches, drinks, and sliced fruits. Then you packed them securely, loading them in a picnic basket along with a large picnic mat. You included your book in the basket and a half-empty bottle of wine from your mom’s collection.
As soon as he returned from Jade’s, you grabbed his hand and led him down a hidden path that wound through the dunes, opening up to a secluded deck. With his help, you boarded a small boat, and he rowed you into the water while you guided him.
“How are you feeling?” you asked, pointing your phone’s camera at him.
“Honestly?” he asked, chuckling. “I think I might have a heart attack.”
You snorted, pretending to be unamused. “Don’t overreact, Hansol.”
Vernon chuckled heartily, his eyes wide with excitement. “I’m serious. I’m so excited that my heart can’t calm down.”
“Well, you’re in for a treat,” you told him, giggling.
You took pictures together, lots of them. While he rowed and enjoyed the majestic view, you captured his reactions and marveled at how beautiful he was in the pictures. But ultimately, no camera could ever give justice to how amazing he looked in real life.
“No way,” he exclaimed as you neared your destination. Rowing faster, he repeated. “No fucking way. Are you serious?”
You nodded proudly. “I am.”
The island sat idly, surrounded by clear blue waters. The sky was a canvas of soft blues and whites, with the sun casting a golden glow over everything. As you approached the dock, Vernon couldn’t contain his amazement, showering praises for the place and for you bringing him there.
“Technically, it was you who brought us here,” you smiled, watching him securely tie the boat to the dock.
“Wow, this is amazing,” Vernon said, his eyes lighting up as he took in the scene.
You smiled, feeling a sense of satisfaction at his reaction. “Come on.”
You set up the picnic, spreading the mat on a cozy spot under a shady tree. After snapping a few more pictures, you both settled down to eat. The sun made the water glimmer, and a gentle breeze rustled the leaves around you. The sound of waves gently lapping against the shore also created a soothing backdrop. The sandwiches were simple but delicious, and the wine added a touch of elegance to the meal.
As you enjoyed the picnic, you talked about your hopes and dreams, sharing stories from your past and envisioning possibilities for the future. The more you talked, the more you realized how much you had in common and how much you enjoyed each other's company. 
After a while, Vernon lay back on the mat, pulling you down with him. You nestled into his side, resting your head on his chest as he wrapped an arm around you.
“This is perfect,” he murmured, his voice soft and content.
“I’m glad you liked it,” you replied, closing your eyes and savoring the moment.
Time seemed to slow down as you lay there, feeling completely at peace in each other’s presence. You didn’t need to say much; just being together was enough. The island, the picnic, the gentle rhythm of the waves – everything was just right.
You spent the day lounging on the mat, sometimes talking, other times just enjoying the comfortable silence too, where you just sat together, listening to the waves and feeling the warmth of the sun on your skin. Vernon occasionally played with your hair, his fingers gently untangling knots or just running through it. You read a book, leaning against his chest, while he scrolled through his phone, sharing funny memes or interesting articles he came across.
At one point, you fed each other pieces of fruit, laughing when you missed his mouth and he pretended to be mortally wounded. By 3 in the afternoon, the sun casted a beautiful golden hue over the island. You watched Vernon glow magnificently under this golden light, feeling an overwhelming sense of contentment. You knew that no matter where life took you, moments like these would always hold a special place in your heart.
“You should have brought that spearfishing thing you had in your shed,” he quipped after a while.
“Do you even know how to use it?”
“No,” he confessed, chuckling. “But it shouldn’t be so hard, right?”
“No clue. I didn’t like fishing so I wasn’t interested in knowing how it worked.”
“Oh. It wasn’t a good idea then.”
You huffed impatiently. “Yeah, it wasn’t. And even if one of us knew how to use it, I still wouldn’t bring it here. I would hate for this to be ruined by you running around trying to catch some fish instead of spending all your time with me.”
Vernon’s chest vibrated as he laughed, finding your cute aggression endearing. 
You pushed yourself up, sitting so you could look him in the face. “I wasn’t trying to be funny. I’m serious.”
Vernon shifted on his side, touching your chin with his fingers so he could look into your eyes. “Do you have any idea, the slightest clue, about how adorable you are?"
You smiled, your ire long forgotten as your heart swelled with affection. “You're just trying to sweet talk me again,” you replied before leaning in to kiss him gently. His lips were soft and warm, and the kiss deepened as he pulled you closer, his hand caressing your back.
Breaking the kiss, he rested his forehead against yours, both of you breathing in sync. “I love you,” he said softly, his voice full of sincerity.
Your heart picked up its pace, surprised and ecstatic because of his unexpected confession. You were right, after all. This is no longer a fleeting summer romance. You and Vernon have developed something more than just that. 
“I love you too,” you replied, feeling the truth of your words resonate deep within you.
He kissed you again, this time, more fervently. You moved to straddle him, your sundress spreading gracefully across his waist. Vernon sat up for a better position, his hand slipping under your dress and feeling up the smooth skin of your thigh. The more you kissed him, the crazier your head went. 
You let him touch you, kiss you, and undress you. His kisses trailed all the way to your breasts, and his hands expertly traced your every curve. At this point in time, you can finally say Vernon has successfully memorized you.
You kept grinding on his crotch, eager to satisfy the aching between your legs. “Why’d you have to wear those jeans?” you complained, frustrated by the rough fabric of his pants.
Vernon chuckled heartily, lifting your legs and gently pushing you off of him. “Whatever happened to decency and not doing scandalous acts in public?”  
You scoffed as he lay you down on the mat. “Would you like to stop here, then?”
“No. Absolutely not,” he replied, unbuckling his belt and dipping low to kiss you again.
As he brushed a strand of hair from your face, his fingertips lingered on your skin, leaving a trail of tingling sensation in their wake. It was a bribe, a gentle gesture to distract you while he tried to be one with you again– in body and soul.
An exclaim tore out of your mouth, surprised when his manhood slid through you completely. It wasn’t rough, nor was it painful, it was a cry of pleasure. Vernon shushed you, cooing at you as he began moving between your legs. It didn’t take long for you to get used to it. Your body has known him after all the nights you had spent together. You and Vernon have become a perfect pair, fitting perfectly with each other in every way as if it were by design.
“You look so beautiful right now,” he rasped, kissing the side of your mouth down to your neck. “You have no idea how much you drive me crazy.”
“Oh, Hansol,” you cried needily, not restraining your moans and confidently screaming his name. 
“Yes, love,” Vernon growled, his pace getting rougher the louder you got. “That’s my name. That’s my fucking name!”
Your breaths synchronized, a rough but steady rhythm that mirrored the beating of your heart. He moved closer as if you were not already joined together. The remaining space between you dissolved, replaced by a closeness that felt both comforting and exhilarating. Vernon's gaze softened, and he leaned in, his forehead resting gently against yours. The scent of him enveloped you, familiar and comforting.
“I love you,” he whispered as he continued ramming into you. 
The kiss that followed that confession made you delirious, completely overcome by passion and desire for Vernon. Every touch and every whisper of breath against your skin added to the mounting tension, a heady sensation of pleasure and anticipation. Your heart raced, each beat echoing the intensity of the moment.
You screamed his name, begged him not to stop, and moved with the rhythm of his body. You tugged and scratched and shamelessly bucked your hips to meet his. Until the high finally came crashing through. Time seemed to blur, and for a moment, the world was nothing but pure, unadulterated sensation. Every muscle in your body contracted and then relaxed. The feeling was overwhelming, a blissful explosion that left you breathless and trembling.
Vernon thrust a few more times into you before he too let out a guttural grunt and fell on your side, catching his breath with a content smile on his lips. You moved closer to him, nuzzling your face on his chest. Your mind floated in a sea of euphoria, your body pulsing with the aftershocks of the intense release.
“What if someone saw?” he quipped, playing with the ends of your hair.
You giggled. “People rarely come to this part of the bay.”
As the day came to a close, you packed up your things and got back into the boat. Vernon rowed you back to the mainland, both of you wrapped in a comfortable silence. Just as the sun was about to set, you found yourselves back on the beach, walking hand in hand along the shore. The sky was painted with brilliant hues of orange and pink, and the waves glowed with the last light of the day. It was at that moment, with the beauty of the sunset surrounding you, that you realized just how much Vernon meant to you.
It was a memorable day, forever etched in your memory. Even as you stood alone at the airport, watching the plane that was supposed to take you and Vernon to his home fly to the sky, the memories from that little island replayed in your head. That man who said he loved you has flown away, leaving you to pick up the pieces of your shattered heart.
[To be continued in Part 2]
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PLATONIC yandere Percy jackson x mother reader
This is based off the head cannons by Lady-Ashfade @lady-ashfade ( thank you so much for letting me. )
I love Sally I really do and I tried to fit her in but I couldn't fit her in also Percy might be a little Out of character idk how I feel about this
Trigger warnings swearing , Gabe is more abusive like the books that the show , blood
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Percy didn't like it when you're attention was on anybody other than him. Percy had never wanted to leave you alone with smelly Gabe and go off to some fancy school so he was relieved when he got home. Actually Percy had straight up refused to go to Yancy Academy because it meant he wouldn't be near you . Also you had gotten a few calls from Yancy saying Percy had sent someone to the hospital because they dared to make a joke about you but did you believe them? No you didn't because in your eyes Percy could do no wrong. Percy stood in front of the door to the apartment but stopped when he heard screaming and the sound of glass shattering and your pained yelp as soon as he heard you're yelp he aggressively opened the door. He saw you clutching your left arm which was bleeding badly and probably had glass in it from the beer bottle Gabe had smashed onto it.
Percy lost it when he saw you in pain . Percy hit Gabe in the back with the closes thing to him which happened to be a pen Riptide although Riptide wouldn't do any good since Gabe is a mortal so Percy just jabbed the pen really hard into Gabes back. “ HURT HER AGAIN AND I'LL SLIT YOUR…..” Percy started but you cut him off. “ Hey I'm ok sweetheart I'm ok.” You said interrupting him. “ I'm ok sweetheart.” Although neither you or Percy were entirely convinced of that. “ Mom you're arm…..” Percy said . “ I'm going to clean up then I have a surprise for you.” You said and walked into the bathroom about twenty minutes later you came out showered and you're arm wrapped. “ I forgot to give these to you.” You said holding out a bag of blue sour strings. “ Thanks mom!” Percy exclaimed. “ Of course sweetheart. That's not the surprise though. We're going to Montauk.” You said. “ Really? Just you and me?” Percy asked excited. “ You were serious about that?” Gabe complained.
“ Yes now give me the dam keys.” You said stretching your hand out. “Never. I'm not handing my keys to my car over to you.” Gabe said. “ Yes. You are.” You replied. “ Give her the fucking keys or I'll do far worse than stick a fucking pen into your back. I'll get a knife and shove it down your …” Percy started. Gabe handed you the keys. Well the trip went wrong quickly. “ Dam it I wish I had more time.” You muttered to yourself. “ Mom what's going ON???! AND WHAT'S THAT THING CHASING US???!” Percy shouted. Cue Grover trying to explain. It shattered the glass of the driver window and jammed its horn into the steering wheel causing it to be hard to do anything really. Well the car got flipped. “ Percy I need you to listen to me. What ever happens stay strong my brave boy. Stay strong and brave. I love you my sweet boy. “ You said gently before taking his jacket. “ Mom what are you doing? Mom you're scaring me.” Percy said. “ I love you my sweet boy. Grover make sure he gets to camp.” You said. “ Wait why do you need my jacket mom?” Percy asked. “ He smells half blood…. That's what he's after maybe I can confuse him.” You said.
“Mom No!” Percy exclaimed . You sighed softly pressing his forehead against yours. “ I love you sweetheart but right now you need to be brave.” You said before the minotaur roared again and you ran the opposite direction buying some time for Percy and Grover. The minotaur grabbed you. “ MOM!” Percy shouted . You felt your world go dark. “ NOOOO!” Percy yelled . He charged sword first. “ COME BACK WITH MY MOM YOU FUCKING COWARD!” Percy shouted he wasn't calling you a coward he was calling the minotaur a coward even though he saw it turn to dust. “ Fuck you dad you're a disappointment you couldn't even save my mother. You don't deserve this .” Percy said bitterly putting a blue sour string into the fire.
He jumped on the quest when he found out you might alive somehow. Honestly Percy and Grover were shocked to see you calmly sipping coffee ( or tea if you prefer it or are allergic to dairy) like nothing had happened with Persephone. Also Hades was chill as fuck. “ MOM!” Percy said literally tackling you off the chair and onto the floor into a hug. You chuckled slightly. “ Hi sweetheart.” You said hugging him back tightly. Percy had his precious mother back and he didn't intend to let you go ever again. Even if that meant he had to tear Mount Olympus apart .
Here's the link to Lady-Ashfade's head cannons
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therentyoupay · 1 month
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How would you write Elsa falling first? I absolutely adore your loser Jack pining after put together Elsa, but how would you reverse their roles?
i promise i promise i did not mean to write a one-shot for this. and i SWEAR it is ACTUALLY a one-shot. it is the OLD-SCHOOL definition of a one-shot, because i opened this ask and thought, aw, wouldn't it be cute if i just wrote a little tiny ficlet to illustrate an example of this scenario instead? and then out came 5,297 words. in one sitting. in ONE SHOT.
i would also like the record to show that i LOVED this challenge, i love trying out new scenarios or styles that subvert all the habits i've gotten myself into over the past decade or so!! thank you for this ask!! and, also, let the record show, that even as i wrote a full 5k+ of fic leading up to a "she falls first, he falls harder" scenario, i still couldn't quite hit the mark... in this case, i think it's open to interpretation as to whether she falls first, or they fall at the same time. 🤣 ENJOY. p.s. LOSER JACK?? LMAO WHAT IS THIS
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“Watch your head—“
She ducked just in time, narrowly avoiding the churning of what appeared to be a factory conveyor belt gone awry. A tiny creature smaller than even a Norwegian Mountain Troll cried out in dismay as a cascade of nutcrackers fell into a sorting bin meant for what appeared to be that latest handheld gaming device—the Swap, or something.
Elsa grinned at the chaos surrounding her—little elves scolding one another, scurrying about—and wasn’t the slightest bit embarrassed to see the Pooka—Bunnymund—grinning in delight at her delight. 
(I told you, his eyes seemed to say, as he gestured for her to continue ahead of him through the vast workshop chamber toward the office tucked away in the back. You wouldn’t regret it, if you came with me.)
Without giving him the satisfaction—yet—Elsa merely took in all the productivity around them, and let her gaze sparkle with the Wonder she knew was in them; dryly, she marveled, “It’s July.”
“Christmas doesn’t take holidays, mate,” Bunny winked. “Especially not here.”
Elsa stuck her courage to the sticking place as they approached the office—the door was slightly ajar. No matter what happens, Elsa inhaled and exhaled; you can always go back to Ahtohallan, to Antarctica.
You don’t have to stay here—with them.
Strengthened by this truth, Elsa squared her shoulders and softened her face into something curious and approachable as Bunny opened the door, not bothering to knock.
“OI.” Bunny stepped through the office, holding the door wide, which allowed Elsa to wait at the threshold—suspended between two worlds, two moments, two paths… perhaps two different lives.
“WHAT—Bunny, how many times I say, KNOCK, this program, it is DELICATE—“
“I got a delivery,” Bunny interrupted, and his whole body flinched at the look she gave him, “Er. I mean. I got someone here who you might wanna meet.”
And if Elsa had known then what she knew now, she would have realized in that moment (when North laid eyes on her that July evening in the middle of his work on the newest rollout of the popular role-playing video game—the Sums, or something) that, truly, the future was always in motion, her path already treaded, and—despite all her beliefs, her past, her heartbroken memories—her heart was already preparing to have two homes.
//
Elsa had visited plenty of warm—tropical, arid, sweltering—and chaotic, sprawling places in her travels, but none quite compared to the utter bustle of the Workshop. 
Over the next three weeks of her stay, Elsa grew accustomed to the factory’s noises, to the bickering between the elves and their strange adoration for her, to the yeti’s curious questions about her years at the south pole. They asked relentless questions about the melting ice caps, the fierce predators, and the tiny human-made stations; she answered them as best she could, having wandered Antarctica for only half a decade before Bunnymund happened to find her at the tip of Cape Adare. When she tried to explain that she was much more familiar with the Arctic, they listened politely, but they were clearly much less interested in land so close to home. They also had the strangest custom of bringing her icicles when they returned from their perimeter patrols; she was growing quite a large collection of them in the guest room in the Main House. 
The others—called Guardians, she learned—flitted in and out of this headquarters at seemingly all times of day. 
Sandy was shocked and delighted to see her again; they’d run into each other just once during the late 1940s, and only when Elsa was passing through a city—Barcelona, if Memory served—to familiarize herself with the changing of the times as quickly as possible. 
Sandy made no delay in giving her a much more insightful tour of the Workshop than North’s exuberant one had been, which had focused rather on not-so-subtle hints at how wonderful a life it was to be a Guardian, and such wonderful news it was to hear that Elsa was intrigued by Bunnymund’s offer to meet them, and so wonderful that Elsa had been spending all these years doing all that she could to explore the wonders of the world. 
(North was lovely, and welcoming, and fierce—and so boisterous!
And not subtle at all.)
After a few days of visiting the Workshop, Elsa grew comfortable enough to truly relax as she roamed its halls, visited the various stages of production, and occasionally caught up with Bunny as he flitted in and out of the Shop (“Easter is on Holiday!” he’d said, with another wink). She dined with North and his team of merry workers, often with Bunny, who, she learned, was rather too fond of eggnog, and sometimes with Sandy as well. 
After only a few hours into Sandy’s first visit, Elsa allowed herself to laugh with her whole chest at the ridiculous antics, the absurdity of it all, the bickering among Sandy, and North, and Bunny—and allowed herself to be endeared by the clear respect they held for one another, by the lightness in the air, the distinct sensation of family. That night, Elsa didn’t immediately retreat to her room after dinner, as she normally would have.
The Memories were not so painful, here. 
//
And their stories! 
They regaled her each night over (and after) dessert—about this horrid creature named Pitch Black, about the Moon, about the Battle of Burgess—they all sounded like fairytales to Elsa, even if she, herself, had practically been living in one for nearly two hundred odd years. 
The others told her of two other coalition members who fought beside them—both of whom were exceptionally busy, and who would not be journeying to the North Pole again until it was time to celebrate the Equinox.
Elsa was curious about Toothiana—and anxious, about the Memories she protected—and especially curious about the Guardian named Jack… 
Frost. 
She did not shy away from asking more about him—Elsa had far too little time to worry about such silly fears like embarrassment; immortality was funny like that—and her curiosity grew with each tale she heard. The Guardians spoke of Jack with a mix of fondness and exasperation—his mischievous nature, his loyalty, how bloody annoying he is, I tell ya, that’s what I say.
Elsa could not help but laugh at Bunny’s pervasive frustration with his teammate; his respect for Jack was clear, even if his patience was not.
Still… she had been wandering the world for over 200 years, and in all that time, she had never encountered any others like her, and certainly not anyone especially like her. 
The thought of meeting someone who might understand,  who might have powers like hers,  stirred something deep within her— something she hadn’t felt in a long time.
She caught Bunny staring at her in the midst of a reverie by the fire during an after-dinner coffee, so she crisply declared, “Don’t say it.”
“What’s that, Ice-pop? Sorry, couldn’t quite hear you over all of that Hope in your heart.”
Bunny, Elsa learned, was used to ducking snowballs.
//
Later that evening, as she stood by one of the desperately-tall windows in the corridor leading to her guest quarters—watching the snowflakes drift lazily from the sky—Elsa couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like to actually meet him. 
The thought of Jack—a potential ally? a friend? a teammate?—occupied her mind more and more as the days passed, and with each story the Guardians told, Elsa found herself hoping that this Jack Frost—a teacher? a guide? a confidant?—would be looking forward to meeting her, too.
//
Sometimes, late at night, she would lie awake and wonder what it would be like to have someone in her life who understood her powers as deeply as she did. She imagined his face, always in motion, always just out of reach, and felt a strange sense of—Hope? Elsa rolled her eyes at the ceiling. Anticipation? Perhaps.
Fear?
In these quiet moments, she found her spirit reaching out, as if she could almost call to him—but of course, he was completely out of reach, never having met her before, and likely, perhaps, not even knowing that she existed until only recently... But her heart would quicken at the idea of meeting this person like her, of seeing his eyes—what color?—filled with the same understanding, the same longing for connection that she felt.
What would he think of her? Would he see the strength she had built over centuries? Or would he only see the loneliness that still clung to her, despite all her efforts to cast it aside?
The questions swirled in her mind, mingling with a strange sense of exhilaration that made her feel both alive and vulnerable.
She could almost hear the laughter they might share, the way their powers could dance together in the air, creating something beautiful, something new.
And in those moments, she couldn’t help but smile, imagining a world where she wasn’t alone, where someone else could stand beside her in the snow, not as an adversary— 
But as an equal.
//
“And did he wield ice magic as a human, as well?” Elsa pressed over after-dinner coffee in the drawing room, leaning forward in her chair near the fireplace. North’s giant hands were absurdly large compared to his delicate teacup. “Before he became a Guardian?”
“As a matter of fact—no. The power came later, AFTER Turning.”
Elsa considered his words carefully. Something about his expression seemed rather cagey; centuries of reading strangers’ faces had only honed her political prowess, which had been born out of survival as much as any sense of duty. 
“North, tell me: why do you want me to join the Guardians?” 
“I—ah! ELSA—
“Because ya’d be mighty good at it!” Bunny blurted, calling over from his newspaper reading on the other side of the drawing room, to North’s indignant sputtering, “if you wisened up and stopped hiding all Hope and Wonder!” And then, as an afterthought, “And it’ll keep Jack humble, I reckon!”
“ASTER!” North scolded fiercely, but he set the tiniest teacup down with the tiniest clink and placed the saucer on the coffee table with such deliberate care, even in his fit of anger, that Elsa couldn’t hold back a small, genuine smile. 
//
“Dont’cha worry, Ice-Pop,” Bunny told her later, as they stood in the wide, cold corridor leading into the main entry chamber of the Workshop, where Bunny preferred to open his portals. Elsa quirked a brow at him, and he chuckled. “We’re not here to actually convince ya. We just want you to see that there’s another option. This Choice… well. Guardians gotta make it for themselves.”
She still had too many questions. How is it that I had never crossed paths with any of you but Sandy, before? 
How is it that I have managed to avoid Pitch for all these years? 
Why me? What can I really offer—when you already have someone who can already do what I do?
“You still have time before you have to decide. And you need to meet the rest, anyway. Just think about it, is all,” he said, all his wisdom seeping into the very air around them. He cracked open a portal and, a moment later, he was gone. 
//
“Oh!” said an utterly beautiful creature, her wings fluttering with so much excitement and delight that she was practically vibrating. “You must be Elsa!”
Elsa and Toothiana took to one another with surprising ease; time had steadied Elsa’s heart, had taught her the patience and endurance and the strength of a glacier; time had energized Toothiana, who took charge of the world with her vast army and a wide smile. But it had been so long since Elsa had even felt anything remotely similar to the feel of holding onto her sister—and Toothiana understood, completely. 
Toothiana shared stories of her own—a whirlwind of adventures collecting memories and moments, each one a treasure she held dear.
(Toothiana's eyes softened as she took Elsa's hands in her own, her understanding gentle yet firm. "I know what it’s like to carry the weight of Memories, Elsa," Toothiana whispered, her voice a comforting balm. "But here, with us, you don’t have to carry them alone. We’re all in this together, and we’ll help you find your way.”)
And Elsa found herself starting to believe her. 
To Believe in them.
//
When the Guardians gathered around the fire—taking time, they said, to ensure that past mistakes were never repeated, that they carved out time for themselves the way they never used to—the conversation inevitably turned to their adventures, to answering Elsa's questions. Somehow, Jack always seemed to be at the center of their tales.
She was rather alarmed to realize the extent to which she had begun to wait for these moments, eager to hear more about Jack, piecing together an image of him in her mind that was as elusive as snowflakes on the wind. Why on earth does not a single Guardian commission a portrait, for goodness’ sake? But Elsa dared not ask for a Memory; apparently, there were still some things left worth being too embarrassed to ask for, after all.
So she contented herself with the way Sandy would add details to the story that the others had forgotten, conjuring up glowing scenes of Jack’s playful antics in vague, golden sand—flurries of snowflakes, intricate frost patterns on windows, and the gleeful laughter of children echoing through the air. 
She would find all their efforts rather suspicious… if they weren’t all being so utterly obvious about their Hopes.
Thus, one evening, as they were all gathered around the fire, Elsa couldn’t help but ask, “How did Jack become a Guardian?”
Bunny’s keen eye sharpened upon her cheek; she withstood the scrutiny, allowing him no further entry to her mind, as he added, “Jack was chosen by the Moon, like the rest of us.” 
“But Jack…” Toothiana’s voice was soft and somber and unusually serious; the atmosphere in the room shifted, its axis tilting ever so slightly. “He had a harder time accepting it. At first! That is.”
“Took him a while to figure out, is all,” Bunny held his boomerang up to the light, checking the polish. “He came around, eventually.”
“Why?” Elsa asked, genuinely curious.
Sandy floated closer, his golden sand forming an image of a young boy standing alone in the snow, his face a mixture of confusion and sorrow. The image flickered, and the boy’s expression shifted to one of determination and hope.
“Not easy for Jack, his Turning was,” North said, his voice softening. “Not easy for any of us… But Jack had no Memories of his past, no knowledge why he was Chosen. It wasn’t until centuries after his Turning that he found his center.”
“His center?” Elsa echoed, intrigued.
“FUN!” North boomed, smiling, and sending teacups clattering everywhere. Elsa clutched her saucer with both hands. “But not just ANY fun—bringing joy and wonder to children, making them BELIEVE in magic and in themselves. THAT is Jack’s true power!”
Elsa considered this as Bunny complained about dropping his boomerang polish and spilling it all over the carpet. Toothiana was laughing at him and offering to help in equal turns, as Elsa’s mind turned over the implications of centers—and Jack’s in particular. She had spent so long searching for her own purpose, her own… center? Do I have one? As well? Is that why Bunny had found her, out alone at the edge of the iceberg, at the exact moment when she had let it all go, had accepted that she may never find her purpose, that perhaps she did not have one—was that the moment that they had been waiting for?
And now, here in this team, Elsa might soon meet someone who had also once struggled with the same questions, who had found his answers in the most unexpected ways… It makes me, dare I say it… Wonder... 
She glanced at the Guardians, each of them so sure of their place, their role in the world, with all their quirks and their trust and their happiness. They had found their centers, their reasons for being. And Jack—this mysterious figure who was off wreaking havoc in some apparently historic winter season in New England—had somehow found the same. She wanted to know more about this spirit who had lived in solitude for so long, who had found a family among these remarkable beings, and who wielded the same icy power she did, yet in a way so different from her own—or, at least, so they thought. Nobody could quite seem to explain to her the exact mechanics of it all.
The more she heard about him, the more she felt a growing need to meet him. She caught herself imagining what their first meeting might be like—whether he would be as mischievous as they said, or if they would take a liking to one another right away, bonded by their similar powers, their similar stories… Perhaps he might help her make sense of… all this? Maybe there was something in him that could help her understand herself better. Maybe he could be… another friend? An ally. A partner. Elsa did not care about the name; what mattered was only that they could learn from each other. 
But still. She could not quite deny that her excitement at the chance of meeting him was, perhaps, a bit more complicated than all that. 
“I still don't understand. You already have someone whose powers are like mine,” Elsa pointed out reasonably, just when the others had started to turn the conversation to simpler matters. “How could I possibly contribute?”
Bunny barked with laughter from the other side of the circle, over the recipe book he was now reading, preparing for their grand dinner to celebrate the Autumnal Equinox. Sandy giggled in golden, sparkling shimmers. North’s laughter was as reassuring as it was alarming.
“ELSIE, my dear,” North boomed as he strode closer to the wing-backed chairs that Toothiana and Elsa were hoarding by the fire, just under the wide window of the central tower, which overlooked the northern tundra. “It is not about powers alone! It is CENTERS.”
“And besides!” Bunny called out over his recipe book, adjusting his reading glasses over the bridge of his twitching nose. She could feel his cheekiness from the other side of the room, but Elsa was particularly amused by the way Toothiana’s whole body tensed up in preparation for Bunny’s antics.  “You’re the better deal on both fronts, anyway!” 
Toothiana scolded him for the next five minutes but hardly put any real fire into it, and North’s voice echoed throughout the study (“Now, now, Bunny—Jack has only been with us for two years now—and he has done SPLENDID job—“), and Sandy had already fallen asleep in his preferred winged-back chair by the fire, lulled into a nap by the comforting sound of his fellow Guardians arguing over something utterly ridiculous.
//
Late that night, as Toothiana hastily prepared for departure and her return to her endless work, she caught Elsa by surprise. 
“We’ll understand if you would rather return,” Toothiana was gracious, so considerate in her efforts to not step on painful Memories, to not push Elsa too hard or too fast, too soon. “We recognize that this choice, this Oath, is not for everyone. But we hope you’ll consider it.”
Elsa nodded, appreciating the understanding in Tooth's eyes, though she couldn’t quite find the words to express it. The kindness and patience offered—by all of them—made her feel both comforted and conflicted; this was a choice she had to make for herself, but knowing she wouldn’t be judged either way brought a small measure of peace. 
Toothiana let out a knowing smile that Elsa didn’t quite understand. 
//
Two days before the Autumnal Equinox, the North Pole was strangely quiet; all others were out and about and attending to their centers, preparing their final tasks before they would all meet for the celebration, here in North’s home. 
She thus found herself wandering the hallways alone, her footsteps echoing softly against the stone floor, thinking of the word home, and how it had changed for her over the years—first, her kingdom; then, her sister; then, the secrets that lay in the depths of Ahtohallan, and then nowhere at all.
What was home?
She paused in front of a large, intricately carved door she hadn’t noticed before. There was something inviting about it, something that called to her curiosity. Without thinking, she reached out and pushed it open, stepping into a room bathed in a soft, ethereal glow.
The room was a gallery of sorts, filled with shelves upon shelves of intricate snow globes, each one containing a different scene—some of them cheerful, others serene, and a few that looked like they were mid-snowstorm. Elsa moved closer, her breath catching as she realized what she was seeing. Each snow globe was a memory—not one of Toothiana’s collections of course, but rather, a moving picture—a small clip of some film, captured in glass and suspended in time.
She reached out to touch one that was particularly beautiful—a snow globe depicting a small village blanketed in fresh snow, children playing and laughing as they built snowmen and threw snowballs. The scene was so vivid, so real, that she could almost hear their laughter.
“Beautiful, no?” a voice said softly from behind her.
Elsa turned to see North standing in the doorway, a fond smile on his face as he watched her.
“They’re not Memories,” Elsa whispered, more to herself than to him. “They’re… Reminders.”
“Yes. They help with the Wonder, of course.”
Elsa couldn’t move her gaze away from the glass again. “Whose are they?”
North stepped into the room, his presence filling the space with genuine warmth, with joy. “They belong to all of us. The children, the Guardians… and a few others.”
He gestured to a shelf on the far wall, where a single snow globe sat, slightly larger than the others. It depicted a lone figure standing in the middle of a frozen lake, surrounded by a dense forest. Snowflakes danced around him, but there was a sadness to the scene, a loneliness that tugged at Elsa’s heart. Her fingers itched to reach out and touch the glass.
“That one,” North said softly, “also belongs to Jack.”
Elsa’s breath caught. She had heard so much about him, yet she still knew so little. The thought of him, alone in this beautiful but desolate scene, stirred something deep within her.
Are you someone out there  who's a little bit like me?
Who knows deep down  I'm not where I'm meant to be?
“Yes, he’s been through much,” North continued, his voice gentle, washing over Elsa’s rapidly-blinking thoughts, through the strange swell of sadness that swam through her chest. “But he IS strong, and has found his place among us. Still, there are parts of him that are… sometimes, difficult to reach. Things that… perhaps… someone may help… heal?”
Elsa side-eyed him, beneath her lashes. “You are growing less subtle each day, I fear.”
His boisterous laugh told her he wasn’t deterred in the slightest.
“Elsa, when few more centuries you have, you too shall learn when to drop SUBTLETY. No?”
Haven’t I already? But she humored him with a smile instead. 
“Whatever you decide—we will support you, your Majesty.”
Elsa’s smile slipped, without her meaning to. Throat thick, she whispered, “No one has called me by that title for a very long time.”
Her eyes pricked with tears as North stepped closer to her, looking down at her—the way her father used to. The way her father might have, had he lived long enough to see her step into her own power, at last.
“I do not call you Majesty because you were Queen, or Snow Queen; I say because I remind you that what you have, and what you are, at your center, is FULL of that which makes living so majestic. It is my sincere wish that—“ and Elsa inhaled at the strange expression that passed his face, the soft mix of hope and resignation all at once— “You will choose the Oath with your full heart.”
Elsa wanted to thank him, but she didn’t want to lie; before she could settle on the perfect breath of diplomacy, North patted her shoulder in reassurance, and left the gallery, leaving Elsa with all the Reminders that were not hers, but insisted she be strong, anyway. 
She gazed into the large snow globe, at the figure standing alone on the frozen lake in the deep forest, and Wondered, truly, for the first time, This was also my past… 
Will I also find my future here, too?
//
The Equinox arrived, at last. Elsa had fashioned herself a dress for the occasion, and the excitement buzzing through the Workshop was palpable—everywhere she turned, there were smiles and knowing glances exchanged between the elves and the yetis, as if they all shared a secret that she was just on the cusp of understanding, but not quite privy to.
Elsa did not startle at Bunny’s sudden entrance behind her, but it was a near thing. 
“Stop twitching,” Bunny muttered as he sidled up beside her, at the window, where she was watching the horizon and waiting for the other Guardians to arrive. When she glanced up at him, she found his nose twitching in nervous anticipation. “Don’t overthink it, Ice-pop. Jack’s a handful, but he’s got a good heart.”
“Oh? No further jabs at your friendly foe?”
“Nah,” Bunny grinned. “Today, I’m on my best behavior. Scout’s honor.”
“You mean ‘Toothy’s honor’.”
“Aye, that too.”
She considered pointing out that his nose was equally twitchy, but she let it slide. 
Elsa understood.
And that understanding grew as some of the Guardians started to all trickle in at once; Toothiana sent wide glances about and around the room upon her arrival, and later, as she fussed with the elves’ itineraries, kept catching Bunny’s eye when they thought Elsa was not looking; Sandy checked his watch repeatedly after greeting them all with warm, sandy hugs; perhaps he was conscientious of the time… and yet… North’s laughter was too loud to be completely genuine. Elsa was beginning to understand the true purpose of tonight, swiftly and deeply; this night was no mere dinner, and no simple introduction. Tonight was an audition. An interview.
A trial. 
At this point, Elsa didn’t even mind the inquisition; she just wanted it to start.
//
The storm outside had been raging for over an hour, and yet there was still no sign of Jack. The wind howled, whipping snow into frenzied swirls that danced and spun against the windows of North’s Workshop. The Guardians stood by the large bay window, watching the tempest with a mixture of awe and concern. Elsa had seen far fiercer storms before… but seeing this storm here, now…? 
Elsa didn’t know what to think.
“Where do you suppose he is?” Toothiana murmured, her wings fluttering nervously as she peered out at the swirling snow. “When I got off the globe with him a few hours ago, he’d been in a good mood! Do you think he got distracted along the way?”
Sandy nodded, his golden sand forming an image of a snowflake, delicate and intricate, before it dispersed into the air. North stroked his beard thoughtfully, his gaze never leaving the storm.
“Such a nuisance,” Bunny agreed, his ears twitching as he squinted into the whiteout. “But he’ll wear himself out soon enough. Let’s get started, shall we?”
“Perhaps we might,” North rumbled, his voice filled with a deep, resonant certainty. “Jack may wish to make GRAND entrance—”
Elsa stood slightly apart from the others while they discussed, her eyes fixed on the tempest outside. The storm’s power called to something deep within her, something she recognized and understood. She had created countless storms like this, back in her darker days, when her emotions had been a force she couldn’t control. Here, she’d wanted to be a good guest, so it had been a month since she’d truly put her powers to proper use, out in the relative safety of the deep Antarctic deserts. But this… 
There was a wildness to it, a reckless abandon. This storm wasn’t about emotion. It was—it’s— 
He’s playing!
Just as the words passed through her mind, a voice suddenly piped up behind them, casual and completely out of place in the loud, bustling, tense atmosphere. 
“What are y’all looking at?”
The Guardians turned as one, startled by the unexpected intrusion. There, leaning against a large shepherd’s crook, was someone who could be none other than Jack Frost—his expression one of casual amusement as he took in the scene before him. He had somehow appeared without a sound.
The room, which had been brimming with anticipation, fell into a moment of stunned silence, then burst back into noise and life in the very next breath.
Elsa blinked, her heart still racing from the intensity of the storm and the weight of her expectations. But now, seeing Jack standing there, looking so nonchalant and distant, she didn’t know whether to laugh or feel disappointed. He was lean, with his staff slung over his shoulder, and there was an air of mischief about him, tempered by something darker, something cautious.
North was the first to fully recover, letting out a booming laugh that overpowered the other surprised voices in the room. “Jack, you never fail to surprise us! We were just admiring your WORK outside, no?”
Jack grinned, clearly pleased with himself. “Oh, that? Yeah, just setting the mood.”
Bunny rolled his eyes, though there was a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “You’re a menace, Frostbite. You know that?”
Jack shrugged, his grin widening. “Just doing my job.”
Elsa felt a strange mix of emotions as she watched the easy banter between Jack and the other Guardians. She realized, perhaps too late, that she had built up this moment in her mind, imagining a dramatic, powerful entrance that would define their first meeting. Instead, she was faced with the reality of Jack Frost: a mischievous, irreverent spirit who seemed to take very little seriously, including the storm he had unleashed.
It was at that moment—in her quiet evaluation, her unexplained disappointment, her curious, lingering hope—that Jack caught her gaze. 
Blue.
The playful expression slipped away, just for a flash; his blue eyes met hers, and she saw something there amidst the lingering laughter—something raw and guarded, something that told her that, like her, he was grappling with his own mixed expectations. 
For a fleeting moment, Elsa’s breath caught in her throat, not just from the intensity of his gaze, but from the unexpected warmth that spread through her, as if she’d been touched by a sudden gust of spring wind.
“Jack, Jack, my boy, come—meet Elsa! Our dear Elsa—this is Jack, our newest Guardian.”
Elsa’s heart leapt into her throat. The room seemed to hold its breath as Jack hesitated—and then he stepped forward, approaching them at the window; Elsa stood patiently at Bunny’s side, watching Jack’s tousled white hair catch the light of the whiteout outside, watching as his blue eyes deliberately scanned the decorations around the room. 
Jack Frost… ?
Elsa waited, patient as a glacier as Jack’s smirking gaze flickered over the gathered Guardians as he reached them, and he saluted North with a deliberately careless air. His smirking gaze lingered on each of them before finally landing on hers. 
“Yeah, I’ve heard a lot about you,” he replied. His tone was not unkind, but deliberately casual. “New Guardian, right? They’ve been talking about you non-stop.”
There was a hint of something sharp in his voice, and Elsa felt a pang of anxiety, which she pushed down; Bunny was covering his muttering face with his hand, and Toothiana was rolling her eyes to the ceiling in dismay—or perhaps prayer. Elsa quickly assessed the crisp stare and the hard line of his jaw; she’d been hoping for warmth, for understanding, but what she found in Jack’s gaze was something closer to suspicion.
Keeping her gaze on his, trying to ease the tension she could feel coiling between them, she softly corrected, “I’m not a Guardian.”
At least, not yet… 
Or so I… 
Elsa felt her chin raise; old habits falling back into place; perfect and pretty and polite, all smooth ice underneath; an effective mask for a Queen.
“I’m here on an invitation,” she said softly, and knew that he would not see the ice daggers in her eyes; not yet, although she was certain he was looking for them. “I’m very grateful to North and all of you for hosting me in honor of this autumnal celebration.”
His eyes narrowed slightly.
That is suspicion there, isn’t it? And guardedness… He was trying hard to hide something behind a facade of coolness—some debonair indifference. Elsa recognized the act immediately but played along because there was something else there, too, something that made her heart ache with a familiar loneliness. I’m an ally, she tried to impress upon him through nothing more than the thought. Enough of this!
I could be a friend! 
But then, Toothiana swooped in, her wings fluttering with a cheerful energy that instantly distracted them—if not immediately lifting the mood.
“Well! Isn’t this just the perfect way to spend the Equinox?” she exclaimed, clapping her hands together, drawing their attention away from one another; Elsa was grateful for Toothiana’s quick thinking, her impressive tact. “Jack, I’m sure you’re energized and starving for a glass of eggnog after all that storm-making. Let’s not waste any more time!”
“Uh, did Bunny make it?” 
“What’s it to ya, you little twerp?��� Bunny shot back, narrowing his eyes with mock suspicion.
Jack grinned, the tension easing slightly as he fell into what must have been familiar banter. “Just making sure it’s safe, is all. Wouldn’t want our guest of honor to get sick on her first night here.”
“Actually, she’s been here for over a month now—“
Elsa watched the exchange (Jack was rolling his eyes) with a mixture of amusement and relief and… unease. (Toothiana’s interruption had indeed worked wonders, shifting the focus away from the awkwardness of their initial encounter and giving everyone, including herself, a chance to breathe.)
(And yet… the warmth of the room contrasted sharply with the chill still clinging to her thoughts.)
As they all moved toward the dining room, Elsa fell in step beside Toothiana, grateful for the other Guardians’ subtle (for once!) alliance and support. She marveled at how, even two centuries since her last political summit, Elsa still remembered every step of walking into a political negotiation; Elsa knew how to navigate delicate situations, how to read the subtlest shifts in tone, how to win.
Elsa had always been a fine Reader of the Room; centuries of invisibility had only strengthened her skills. 
And so the Trial begins…
This first impression was a test—one she intended to pass.
//
And although Jack started to relax once they were all seated and well into the evening—his guarded expression giving way to something more genuine as he bantered with Bunny and teased North about his over-the-top decorations—the knots in Elsa’s stomach remained. 
How could she make him see that she wasn’t here to replace him—but to find her own place among them?
The Guardians fell into their usual rhythm as they ate and laughed together, the conversation flowing (mostly) easily between them. Elsa, too, had found her own rhythm with the Guardians during her month-long stay, understanding certain inside jokes and the fascinating nuances of their personalities. But even as she joined in their laughter, the tension between her and Jack was palpable, thicker than the winter storm raging outside.
She observed how Jack's eyes flicked between her and the other Guardians, his smile not quite reaching his eyes as he noted instances of the easy familiarity she had developed with them over the previous weeks. He joked along with everyone else, but there was a sharpness to his tone, occasionally—and it seemed that all the other Guardians could clearly tell, even if they were choosing to ignore it with varying degrees of patience… and understanding. 
Elsa could feel him measuring every word she said, every laugh she shared with the others. It wasn’t just that she was new or unfamiliar—it was that she had quickly become a part of something that Jack had spent years, perhaps centuries, building with them.
All of the Guardians’ assurances and encouragement over the past month had not hinted at the true nature of their concern; Elsa realized quite quickly that this rift wasn’t something that could be resolved with pleasantries or polite conversation.   
Winning his trust wouldn’t come easily—it would demand more than just time; it would require something deeper.
//
Later that night, after everyone had retired to their quarters or gone out for their evenings of work, Elsa found herself wandering the halls of North’s Workshop, her mind a whirl of thoughts and emotions, as was her wont.
The evening had not exactly gone to plan, but she supposed it could have been worse. She couldn’t shake the feeling that Jack still viewed her as a threat. It bothered her more than she cared to admit. She’d need to discuss it with Toothiana tomorrow. Perhaps they might lend me a snow globe?
As she rounded a corner, headed toward the snow globe Reminder gallery, she nearly collided with Jack himself—who seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. He was leaning casually against the wall, his staff resting on his shoulder, but there was a tension in his posture that belied his relaxed demeanor. 
He’d been waiting for her.
“Jack,” she said, startled but keeping her voice steady; once more, familiar, old-fashioned patterns of politeness resurfaced in her moment of uncertainty. “I beg your pardon. I didn’t expect to see you here.”
He didn’t respond immediately, his eyes narrowing slightly as he studied her. “Could say the same about you. Can’t sleep?”
Elsa hesitated, unsure of how much to reveal. “Just... thinking. It’s been a lot to take in.”
Jack nodded, though he didn’t seem entirely convinced. He pushed himself off the wall and took a step closer, his expression unreadable. “You know, everyone seems pretty excited about you joining us. North, Bunny, even Tooth—they all think you’d be a great addition.”
She could hear the ‘but’ hanging in the air, unspoken but heavy between them; the way addition sounded like replacement. 
Elsa squared her shoulders, meeting his gaze head-on. There was an intensity in his eyes, a challenge that sent a shiver down her spine, though she quickly attributed it to the cold. “Jack, I’m not here to replace you.”
The words hung in the air, sharp and clear. For a moment, Jack’s expression flickered, something vulnerable and upset flashing in his eyes before he quickly masked it with a smirk. “Who said anything about that?”
“No one—listen to me, I know you’re worried,” Elsa continued, refusing to let him deflect. “But you have no need to be. I’m not here to take your place. I’m here because…” Why am I here? “I was invited. I am simply getting to know you all better. I’ve been alone for some time.”
“Spare me the politicking,” Jack huffed, which, indeed, Elsa did take offense to. Especially since she genuinely had not been trying to be diplomatic; just careful.
Perhaps he didn’t believe her story… about being alone?
The idea was more painful than she expected.
Elsa’s eyes narrowed slightly, holding Jack’s gaze.  “I’m not here to play games, Jack. I’m just looking for where I might belong—that is all.”
“Will you take the Oath, then? What’s your center?”
Elsa couldn’t explain it, but this struck her as an absurdly personal question. Still. She could recognize a caged animal when she saw one. So, Elsa took a deep breath, feeling the weight of his question press down on her. The idea of the Oath, of finding her center, had been something she had pondered endlessly since she’d learned of its existence—perhaps since her arrival, if she was being honest. But to be confronted with it so directly by Jack, someone who still seemed to see her as a rival, made it all the more daunting.
“I’m not sure,” she finally admitted, her voice quiet but steady. “I’ve been... trying to understand what it would mean for me to take the Oath, to become a Guardian.” She willed him to understand, at last. “It’s not something I want to rush into without being certain.”
Jack’s gaze remained fixed on her, his blue eyes sharp, but there was a flicker of something softer there—a recognition, perhaps, of the honesty in her words. “And your center?” he pressed. “Do you even know what it is yet?”
Elsa hesitated again, her thoughts swirling. A long time ago, she had known who she was, what she was meant to do. She’d thought so. 
But after everything she had been through, all the loss, the isolation, and the rediscovery, she wasn’t sure if her center was what it once had been.
“Perhaps I might have, once,” she confessed, her voice barely above a whisper. “But now... Regardless of whether or not I join you, I’d like to think that there is something at the core of why I am still here.”
“In the Workshop?”
“No, I mean… I mean here.”
Jack tilted his head, studying her with a mix of curiosity and caution. Something told her that she finally got through to him, just a little. Elsa felt herself feeling sympathy for him; even after becoming a Guardian, he was still filled with such… 
Fear. 
Doubt. 
He didn’t respond immediately, his expression unreadable. For a brief, startling moment, she wondered what it would be like to stand by his side, to take the Oath together—as allies, as... something more? 
She brushed the thought aside, but the idea lingered, persistent. 
Then, finally, he let out a small, almost reluctant sigh. “It’s not easy, you know. Being a Guardian. Finding your center. It’s... it’s not something you just, like, stumble upon.”
“I understand,” Elsa said, her tone sincere. “But if there’s a chance that this is where I’m meant to be—then I’m willing to take that risk. I’m not interested in taking that away from you. You—you haven’t even seen what I can do yet! We don’t even know how much overlap we’d find in our powers, anyway!”
“You impressed Bunny in Antartica,” he practically accused. “That’s enough to say something, isn’t it?”
Elsa was trying her very best to remain steady and calm. “And what about you? What did it take for you to find your center?”
His eyes snapped back to hers, and for a moment, she saw something raw and unguarded in his gaze. “So they didn’t tell you everything, huh?”
She gaped at him. Honestly! 
Elsa took a deep breath, steadying herself as she met Jack's gaze. "Jack, you’re being ridiculous. I’m not here to steal anything from you—certainly not your place among the Guardians. I haven’t even decided if—I don’t know if—“
“I already know you’re gonna join us,” he said, almost in a whisper, as if admitting something he hadn’t wanted to face.
“Oh?” Elsa raised an eyebrow, genuinely curious. “And what makes you so sure?”
Jack hesitated for a moment, his eyes searching hers, and then, with a passion she hadn’t expected, he replied, “Because there’s nothing better. There’s nothing like it. It’s everything.”
Elsa was stunned by the raw intensity of his words, the conviction in his voice. She could see it in his eyes—this was more than just a responsibility, more than just a role for him. It was his purpose, his identity—his life, or whatever this agelessness was. For a moment, the air between them seemed to crackle with something unspoken, a deep understanding that went beyond words.
She felt her heart skip a beat, a strange mixture of emotions swirling within her—curiosity, admiration, and something else, something unfamiliar. Her pulse quickened. 
Jack seemed to realize the weight of his words, and he quickly looked away, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. “Wait. I... I’m sorry for how I’ve been acting,” he said, his voice softer now, more hesitant. “I guess I’ve been... on edge, and I took it out on you. That wasn’t fair.”
Still shocked by how deeply his declaration affected her, how his passion stirred something within her that she hadn’t felt in a long time, Elsa softened at his apology, nodding slightly. “I… understand. And I accept your apology. I appreciate… you saying that. I’m sure it wasn’t easy to come home and see someone new in the middle of it all.”
Elsa thought she heard him laugh under his breath, mouthing the word Home—
Jack nodded, his shoulders relaxing just a bit. “Yeah... it is. Anyway.  I’m tired. I think I’m gonna call it a night.”
Elsa watched him start to turn away, a sudden sense of urgency bubbling up inside her. “Jack, wait—”
He paused, glancing back at her, a hint of curiosity in his eyes. They were so wide, when they weren’t glaring! 
“Shouldn’t we start over?” she asked, her voice gentler, almost tentative in her rush. She extended her hand toward him. “My name is Elsa. I happen to wield ice magic. E. Aster Bunnymund found me on an iceberg a few weeks ago as I was in the middle of creating a particularly notable blizzard, and he invited me to meet his friends, whom he loves and respects very much.”
Jack looked at her hand, then back at her face, something unreadable flickering in his eyes. Slowly, a smirk crawled over his face. 
“Alright, I’ll bite,” Jack floated closer, and Elsa held steady—stories or no stories, she had not been prepared to see him fly! “I’m Jack. I also happen to ‘wield’ ice and frost magic. Bunny did not find me on an iceberg, but I’m pretty sure he’d love to stick me in one. Nice to meet you, Elsa, who promises not to steal my spot on the A-team. Welcome to the madness,” and he reached out and took her hand in his, giving it a firm shake. 
The moment their hands touched, a strange, electric current seemed to pass between them, and Elsa felt her breath hitch in her throat.
Oh—
He’s—he’s rather handsome, she realized with a start.
They held each other’s gaze for a moment longer than necessary, the air between them thick with something she could not, would not name. 
Jack was the first to break the silence, his voice a little rougher than before. “Yeah... maybe we should—”
They let go of each other’s hands, but the sensation of his touch lingered, warm and unsettling. Elsa felt a flush creep up her cheeks, unsure of what to make of the emotions swirling inside her.
“Uh—goodnight, Elsa."
“Goodnight, Jack,” she replied, her voice steadier than she felt.
And with that, he turned and disappeared back into the shadows of the corridor, leaving Elsa standing alone in the soft glow of the snow globe gallery. She watched him go, a mix of hope and uncertainty swirling in her chest. The conversation had been difficult, but it had also been a step forward—a tentative, fragile step toward something more. Right?
As she turned back to her quarters, Elsa found herself tracing the line of his smirk in her mind, the curve of his jaw, the sharpness of his eyes—after weeks of wondering about what he might look like, might be like, she finally had the vision, the Memory of his face.
She rushed with the ornate door handle of her guest room, eager to be inside her room, alone, in the peace and quiet, and finally process the events of the evening, to reflect on all that she'd learned, she'd accomplished, she'd proved.
Exhausted by the sheer weight of so many careful decisions in so short a time, Elsa closed the door behind her with a deep sigh. Exhausted, yes, but also satisfied. She shut her eyes as she leaned against the back of the door and allowed herself a small, tentatively victorious grin, content in the knowledge that when she drifted off to sleep that night, the echoes of their meeting, their tentative truce would fill her mind; this moment gave her, indeed, a sense of Hope that she hadn’t felt in years...
But, in her mind, the Memory that lingered most vividly, as she tossed and turned—was his face. 
//
ao3 ✨
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bookshelf-dust · 2 years
Text
love and mandrakes
sirius black x gn!reader
word count: 5,220
warnings: swearing, fluff, i think that's literally it, but let me know if it's not
a/n: hi! so this is new!!! a new character!! sirius black is the loml, and i've been working on this for what feels like forever. i'm really proud of it, and i hope that maybe some of you will like it. it's been very fun to explore a new universe and the marauders as a whole. i hope you enjoy this!! love you 3000 <333
————
The greenhouse windows are frosty this morning, and you can feel the chill seeping in through the thin glass panes. You fight the urge to lift your finger, using the tip to draw a face in the condensation gathering on the one nearest you. 
You’re stood at the back of the greenhouse, like always. You’ve never liked to be very close to Professor Sprout–certainly not because of any disdain towards the woman–but for the fear that she’d have something negative to say about your work. This is despite the fact that she’s been nothing but kind to you regarding every plant that’s ever been in your care.
Really it’s just that you’d beat yourself up if you killed a plant that makes you so determined to do well.
You’re twenty minutes early for class today. Early enough that it’s just you and Professor Sprout in the greenhouse. Everyone else likes to stumble in within the five minutes before class begins.
But clearly, that’s not quite the case this morning. The greenhouse doors open, both rather than just one, and Professor Sprout turns to greet whoever it is.
“Good morning, Mr. Black.”
You look up. Sirius Black is never early to class. If anything, he’s usually either not there at all, or the absolute last one to find his way in, perhaps a half hour late, if not more. He sidles up to Remus Lupin, and suddenly they've got a lovely little group project on their hands.
“Remus won’t be in today, Professor.” Sirius gives her a look that you assume is supposed to induce sympathy on her part. “Seems he’s got a cold.”
Pomona has never found it in herself to be frustrated with the boy, unlike the majority of her colleagues. She’s one of the few professors at the school to not harbor particularly malicious feelings towards the boy. He might be a troublemaker, but who isn’t at that age? 
She’s been briefed on what his home life is like, too, and who he has to put up with. And since she was a young girl, Pomona has been determined to give everyone a fair chance.
"Thank you for letting me know," she tells him.
You watch as Professor Sprout heads to a supply closet and begins to pull out heaps of gloves and what look to be earmuffs, messily tossing away the things she doesn’t need. You're lost in observing her, so consequently the voice sounding a few inches from your ear startles you.
"You always in this early?" Sirius has materialized next to you, the beginnings of a smirk playing at the edges of his mouth. 
You glance at his hand where it lingers over the stem of a plant you’re not sure he should dare to touch. He’s got a ring on every finger excepting his thumb.
“Usually,” you say. It occurs to you that these are some of the first words you've ever spoken to the boy, if you don’t count bare minimum exchanges in the odd class. “I like it back here.”
You like it back there because less people can look at you. Because having to sit somewhere else stresses you out, not to mention throws you off. You feel safe in your little corner. 
Sirius withdraws his hand from the questionable plant and raises his head. His eyes bore into yours. They’re the strangest shade of blue. It seems to shift in the light, and sometimes they look almost gray. He grins, and then begins to scan the area around the both of you.
“Suppose it is nice. Maybe I’ll stay back here with you. Wouldn’t want you to be lonely, you know.” 
You snort at that and he quirks a brow at your amusement. Sirius pushes his hair behind his ear and you realize he’s got a silver industrial piercing.
“That hurt too bad?” You ask, gesturing towards the jewelry and hoping he knows what you mean. He does.
His thumb skips over the metal ball at one end, coming back to fiddle with a section of his robes. He leans forward, grinning at you. His smile is wide. The corners of his mouth tick up mischievously, smile lines conveying layers of mischief you know he must have hidden in that mind of his. 
“Probably wouldn’t have as much if I’d gone to a shop.”
You gasp lightly, thinking about it getting infected and Sirius having a bloody mess on his hands.
“You did it yourself?” You ask, eyes wide and full of concern.
He laughs. It’s a gorgeous sound, deep and friendly. Warm.
“I was prohibited,” he says, pressing a scandalized hand to his chest. “Remus did it for me over break, while my brother played nurse.”
“Well it looks nice,” you tell him, palms beginning to sweat. You find his presence to be slightly overwhelming. “I mean I think so.”
“Thank you, sweets.” He bends slightly at the waist, hand over his stomach, and it’s a gesture you might take as being that of an asshole, if it weren’t for his voice being so kind.
You hum in place of a you’re welcome, trying to will away the swarm of butterflies in your tummy. They’re being rather aggressive. 
“And for the record,” he adds, “Remus was very strict with my cleaning regimen, so I did not get any infections if that’s what you’ve been contemplating.”
“That’s good.” You smile. You’re not sure it’s anywhere near as pretty as his.
Professor Sprout claps her hands, startling you. Today is really not your day. Sirius snorts at your jolt, but when you glance at him he’s pretending to be intensely focused on your instructor.
“Morning, everyone!” she begins. “Today, as you may have guessed, we will start our lessons on Mandrakes. This particular lesson will focus on basic knowledge, as well as care, but come next class, your actual project will begin.”
“You’re going to need a partner, so I’ll give you a few minutes now to choose, that way you can prepare with one another prior to the main exercise.”
All at once, everyone turns to this person and that, chattering and deliberating. It seems everyone has someone.
Your heart starts to pound, and you wonder if maybe Professor Sprout might let you work independently. Pairs are forming, and you can feel yourself being left out, pushed to the edges of society. Maybe that’s dramatic, but it’s how you feel. 
You lean against the table behind you, hoping that she won’t call you out for not having a partner. That is until there’s a figure in front of you.
“What’d you think, huh? Shall we work together?” Sirius stands so that you have no other choice but to look back at him. It’d come off rude to not maintain eye contact at this distance. 
You feel yourself burn and can’t help but wonder if this is some sort of cruel joke.
“Wouldn’t you rather wait and join Remus?” You ask, fingernails picking at the wooden underside of the table.
“You think I’m using you as a fill-in?”
You shrug, rubbing your nose. “We’ve quite literally never spoken an actual conversation before today. I just thought you’d want to work with your friend and not some stranger.”
“Well there’s a first for everything, isn’t there? And you’re not a stranger. I see you all the time.” 
You sigh. He grins, ever pleased with himself. 
“You don’t want to be friends with me?” He teases.
“I—”
“No, it’s quite alright. I’ll see if good ‘ol Mona will help me out.” He turns like he’s going to march away, though his feet barely move. He’s not going anywhere and you both know it. 
“Holy shit,” you start. “Just shut up. Go and get the gloves then.”
Sirius grins. “Demanding, aren’t we?”
He does go and get them though, returning with two sets of gloves and a pair of shears, as Professor Sprout had instructed.
“Today, we will focus on tending to your Mandrakes. I want you, in your pairs, to check the soil and water as needed. I also want you to trim the leaves, as these have been left to run amok for a while. To work!”
Chatter erupts around you, bouncing against the glass walls of the greenhouse.
You fetch a watering can while the area is still free, and Sirius fills it up for you. You notice that your Mandrake is severely lacking the soil it needs. It’s not very well off at all.
“Do you see this?” You ask him, gesturing towards where the roots are showing, clearly dehydrated and with nowhere to sprawl out and grow. “She’s got us treating the wounded.”
Sirius crosses his arms. “That’s a damn shame now, isn’t it? Guess we better heal this thing then.”
“Are you fucking with me?” You ask, eyes darting up to meet his.
“No, I swear. I can tell you’re into this. It’s not my best subject.”
“Well you know what they say.”
“What do they say?” His eyes are gleaming. That’s the best word you can think to use for it. 
“Teamwork makes the dream work.”
He rolls the very same eyes. “I’d like a new partner after that one.”
You laugh, and Sirius feels a pang in his chest. Like he’s taken a blade to the heart, and he can’t do anything but let it happen. Your laugh is such a sweet sound and he worries it might be the death of him.
You slip your gloves on and start trimming the leaves that have to go. There’s quite a few of them, but luckily they seem to be towards the bottom of the stem, and you think once you’re able to water it, the Mandrake might have a chance.
You finish with the shears, and set them down. You look up at Sirius, and your eyes catch a group of buttons on the shoulder of his robes. His hair had been covering them before. You find yourself feeling warm inside, as one in particular tickles your fancy.
“I like your pin,” you say.
His brows shoot up, “Which?”
You use your pinky and tap the glossy finish. He watches. “That one.”
“The Queen one?”
You nod, shoving some more soil into your pot to try and save the roots.
“You listen to them?” Sirius leans down so that his face is next to the Mandrake and in your line of sight. He’s got this brilliant grin. It’s worrying you. For a moment you think he might say something cruel, but the look in his eye is almost boyish.
“Yeah,” you say. “My mom is a muggle. Fell for a dorky wizard boy. So she’s raised me on loads of good stuff.”
“Lucky duck, you.”
You snort and then look up at him, though he's already been looking at you. His eyes haven't left you the whole time you've been working. He finds the way you treat the plant as if it has feelings to be charming. He wonders if you take care of everyone like that. Or maybe even yourself.
You move the soil pouch towards him. "You gonna help me?"
He slips his gloves back on. They really don't match anything he's wearing, and frankly it bothers him a bit. "Of course, of course."
He starts tending to the plant and you watch, noticing the bumps left in the gloves where his rings are hiding underneath.
"Feed her, Seymour," you say, and Sirius whips his head towards you.
"Who the fuck is Seymour?"
"Muggle film. Musical actually. Sorry."
"Don't be sorry for exposing your nerdiness. What's the film about? Talk to me," he proclaims, wincing at the state of his soil work.
“This guy, Seymour, finds a plant, and he tries to take care of it, you know, as you do, but he figures out it only wants blood and meat to eat and that’s what he feeds it, so it keeps growing and growing until it’s big enough that it starts eating people.”
Sirius looks at you with wonder in his eyes, and starts to laugh. "Are you fucking with me, love?"
You start to smile, one that you at first try to suppress, but it ends up spreading across your face, softening your features. Sirius thinks maybe it's the prettiest smile he's ever seen. He can't get over the way the lines around your mouth form, or the way your cheeks bunch and your eyes light up.
"No, I promise."
The boy tugs his gloves off, having finished salvaging the soil for your plant. "Killer plants, huh?"
"Indeed," you say. "You know Mandrakes are killer too, right?"
"Stop."
You start to water the plant, trying your best not to drown the damn thing. "What do you think the earmuffs are for, dumbass?"
You immediately regret calling him a dumbass, thinking you may have crossed a line--it's not like you know him all that well, you've only been speaking for this one class period--but he only smiles at you.
For some reason, you find him easy to be around. He doesn't scare you.
"It's cold."
"Because it's cold? No. After we save the plants we have to re-pot them, and when we take them out they're going to scream. Their cries are fatal, Sirius."
He stares at you. Remus did not tell him this. Technically he could've read his textbook, but clearly he didn't.
"That seems highly uncalled for."
You chuckle and he grins again.
"I agree,” you say. “Have you got the time?”
Sirius pushes his sleeve up, glancing at the watch tight around his left wrist. “We’ve got five minutes left.”
You look up, and notice Professor Sprout removing her gloves. If you’d waited to ask for just a moment longer, she would’ve begun her everyone-get-your-shit-together-and-get-out-of-here speech. 
“Students, your attention please!” Professor Sprout’s cheeks are rosy, tufts of curls sticking out from under the brim of her hat. 
“Next class we’ll try and get the Mandrakes repotted, so that they may grow to their full potential and can then be used as needed for Madam Pomphrey. You’ll need to come and water your plants periodically throughout the week, as these tend to drink rather quickly, so I suggest you alternate days with your companion.”
When you’ve finished and you’re outside once again, it’s misty, your skin dampening with each step you take. 
You feel a hand on your elbow, and Sirius has appeared next to you. Frankly, you hadn’t expected him to continue contact with you. 
The both of you had discussed what days you’d water you plant, and you assumed that was that. 
“I’ve realized we’re co-parenting a Mandrake,” he starts, “and I feel as though I should at least know a little something about the mother of my child.” You raise your eyebrows at him. “You know, to ensure that they don’t grow up lacking proper guardianship.”
“You’re ridiculous,” you say, hopping over a puddle. 
He tosses his head back, laughing, and you feel your insides go all warm and gooey at how his hair moves with the motion. You can’t help but wonder what it feels like. 
“First, you don’t want to be friends, and now, you want our child to be one of divorce.”
You stop, resting your forehead against the cool stone of one of the courtyard walls. 
“Sirius, we haven’t even been married.”
He presses his forehead against the stone next to you, and you turn to look at him. “I’m pretty sure there are a good bit of people who’ve been married and know less about each other than we do,” he says. 
You smile at the wall and he catches it. 
“Besides, we’ve got the same music taste, and that means I’ve got to keep you around.”
“Is that so?”
“Yeah, that’s how this works. Didn’t you know?”
You brush at the side of your robes where you’ve now gotten moss remains on them. “I was not aware, no.”
“Haven’t you got class or something?” You ask him. His cheeks are pink from the cold, a stark contrast from the chill of his eyes, the sharp black of his hair. 
“Not for another hour. You?” 
“Yeah, actually.”
“So tell me something quick.” He spins a ring around his finger, a chunky silver one with something set into the center. “What’s your favorite color?”
“Seriously?”
He smiles. It’s gorgeous and full-fledged. You can’t believe he’s looking at you like that. It feels like some big error. 
“Sorry I set myself up for that one,” you say. “Um, it’s green.”
“Lovely. Now what shade of green are we talking?”
“Sirius.” You pout. 
“Come on now, chop chop.” He snaps his fingers. “Thought you had an excuse to ditch me or something?”
You roll your eyes. It seems that cocky ass grin never leaves his face. “Like a forest green. Trees and such.”
Sirius claps his hands together, metal clinking. “That’s fantastic. I’ll be sure to remember it. Mine’s purple, by the way, thank you for asking.”
“I bet you look stunning in purple, Sirius.”
He blushes. He actually blushes. You grab for his wrist and push his sleeve up to peer at his watch. 
“I’ll see you around, okay?”
For the first time in a long time, Sirius Black hasn’t got shit to say. No one ever makes him blush. 
————
“I don’t come to class one day, and you’ve made a new friend? Why couldn’t you have made a new one any other day? I think I need some time off. Maybe even early retirement.” 
Sirius smacks Remus on the shoulder where the latter lays stretched out in bed. The curtains are drawn one one side so that the only person they’re visible to is James, who is half asleep in the neighboring bed, glasses askew and tie on the brink of choking him. 
“It’s rude to abuse the wounded.” 
“You’re off your rocker, Lupin.”
Remus rubs his face, though he winces, his arms much too sore for any sort of activity. “Tell me about it.” 
“Feeling any better today?” 
“Yes, Sirius. I’m feeling fucking wonderful.”
“He’s being sarcastic.” James’ voice is muffled by the pillow he’s collapsed into. 
Sirius turns to look at his friend. “Yeah, no shit, Prongs. Thank you so much for enlightening me.”
James raises a weak arm, flipping him off. “Eat me.”
“You say that as if I won’t do it.”
James sits up, but only enough so that he may rearrange himself into a poorly structured child’s pose. “Stop being such fucking tease and do it then, babe.”
Remus rubs his eyes aggressively, like it might somehow rid him of his ever permanent longing for sleep. “Shove it, you two.” He peeks out from between his fingers at Sirius. “I thought you were saying how you’ve made someone else miserable with the joys of your friendship.” 
“Fuck you,” Sirius says.
“Yeah, yeah.”
“I did make a new friend. In herbology, since you decided to have a go with the moon and left me to perish.” Remus rolls his eyes. “They’re very kind, if you must know. We are co-parenting a Mandrake.”
James snorts into the mattress. 
“Is it really co-parenting if you’ll make them do all of the work?” Remus asks. 
James snorts again and Sirius leans over to smack him against the back. He lets out a pathetic cry that both of the other boys ignore. 
“I’m helping, asshole,” Sirius begins. “I’m supposed to go water the fucking thing in a bit if either of you need proof of life.” 
“Of your friend or of your child?” Remus reaches his arm out to grab hold of one of the bedposts and heave himself up. 
“Both.”
James slides off of his bed and starts to stretch, and a cacophony of cracking sounds follows, which is slightly concerning considering his age. “Sorry. I’m supposed to go and see Lils. But I expect a full report back, Moons.” He strips off his tie and pulls on a coat. The other two boys watch him bound across the room like they’re at a tennis match.  
James is gone so quickly you’d be amazed that he was half-asleep minutes before. 
“What a prick,” Sirius says from where he sits at the foot of Remus’ bed. He looks away from the door and at his friend. 
Sirius sets his hand on Remus’ knee. “You get any sleep this morning?” 
“Some. Not enough. Though it’s never enough, or whatever.” Sirius gets a pang in his chest. He wishes he could make it all better. 
“You want to get some fresh air? You can come with me to the greenhouses if you want, but you can stay here too. I’ll sneak down to the kitchens and get you something.”
“No, it’s okay. I’ll go with you. Sun’s not out, is it? It’ll kill my head.”
Sirius stands and peers beneath the drawn curtains. It’s cloudy, like it might storm, a thick layer of cloud lying over the grounds. “Nope. She’s hiding from you today.”
Remus nods and his friend walks back over to his bedside. “Come on, Rem.” 
He removes the blankets from over his lap and scoots to the edge of his mattress. Sirius holds out his hands for Remus to take. Sometimes he gets really woozy when he has to stand after nights like the last. His knees shake, but he’s steady once he’s up. Sirius keeps an arm around his back when there isn’t anyone in the halls to question Remus’ condition, but has to settle for watching his friends footing otherwise. 
Sirius gets Remus on a bench and makes a stop by Madam Pomphrey on the way, feigning a headache. She gives him a little bottle of these chewable tablets with instructions on how often to take them and tells him to come back if the ache persists. 
He hands the bottle to Remus when he’s finished, and the boy’s had the medicine for an entire four seconds before he’s chewing. It’s one of those headaches that stays dull, but any sudden movement and your entire skull is throbbing and he thinks he might just die. Remus thinks this every full moon. He is not dead. 
The trip to the greenhouse takes longer than usual, mainly because of Sirius’ tendency to baby Remus during his moon hangovers. He claims it’s because he doesn’t want a death on his hands, something about living up to the Black name, but Remus knows it’s really because Sirius is much more caring than he’d ever admit. 
“See? Look at this fucker. My child.” Sirius gestures dramatically at the potted plant. Remus leans up against one of the tables, only slightly amused, much more out of breath. 
He’s only just gone digging for a watering can when he hears the door open and glances up, assuming it’s another student having to monitor their own dirt ball. 
But it’s you. 
“What’s up, love?”
Remus’ eyebrows shoot up. He hadn’t realized when Sirius said he made a friend he actually meant friend. He’s never really seen Sirius look at someone that way. 
You stand by the doors, kicking the one you came through shut behind you. Sirius pretends like he’s not attracted to the movement. 
“Hi,” you say. You step a little further into the room. “I know it’s not my day to water, but frankly I was kind of worried you’d forget to do it.”
Remus turns to face you and laughs, full on. You grin at him. He’s never really looked at you before, but there’s no denying how sweet you look. He bets you could kick Sirius’ ass if you wanted. He also thinks Sirius might let you do it. 
Sirius straightens and flips his hair back as he does so. “You wound me.”
You shrug. “I was also slightly panicked you’d drown the thing, so there’s that.” 
Sirius walks over to the sinks, filling up his watering can, though you both know he could easily use a spell to do it instead. “So you came to supervise?”
“‘Fraid so.” You chew on the inside of your lip. 
“I don’t blame you,” Remus says. “He’s kind of a flake.”
“Fuck you, Rem.”
“Yeah, sure.” Remus pushes off of the table, moving in the direction of you and the doors. His head is starting to feel better. He leans in next to you, though his voice is anything but a whisper. “I don’t know why you’re putting up with him. Would’ve asked for a different partner myself.”
“She picked me!” You laugh, seeing Sirius put his hands on his hips out of the corner of your eye. 
Remus raises a brow at you. “Oh yeah?” He smiles at you. It’s a knowing expression, an understanding one. He keeps his eyes on you, but speaks to Sirius. “I’m gonna go for a walk, Pads. Come and retrieve me when you’re finished.” 
The squeeze Remus gives to your shoulder is kind. It tells you you’re safe with Sirius. With him. That you’re welcome. The glass door rattles as it shuts. 
“You really have no faith in me?” Sirius asks, spritzing the Mandrakes leaves. You peer into the pot, noticing he’s watered it just right. It’s not going to drown after all. 
“No, I’ve got plenty. Maybe I just wanted to see you again.” 
Sirius sets the bottle he’s holding down. “No shit.”
“Well you see, last time you asked me a question, and I didn’t get to ask you one of my own, and I figured I’d better do that if I want to keep the friendship alive, you know?”
Sirius is smiling at you. He can’t believe this–your teasing. 
He runs the pad of his thumb along your cheekbone. “So what’s the question?”
“Do you like pie?” you question.
“I do.”
“That’s good. Because I feel the same way, and rumor has it you can get into the kitchens, so I thought we could work together on this...and get pie. It’s like a reward. I put up with you and you put up with me kind of thing, so we get something to eat.”
Sirius tosses his head back, letting out a bark of a laugh. Your eyes linger on his neck for a second longer than they should. 
“Well the rumors are indeed true,” he says. “Guess we’ll have to ditch Remus, then. Make it a proper date and whatnot.”
“That seems unkind,” you chuckle.
“He’ll live.”
————
“What’s happening here?” Sirius throws himself into one of the chairs on the other side of the table where you and Remus sit. 
“We’re reading,” Remus tells him. “Go away.”
Remus had shown you to this table. Said it was his favorite. There are a small group of them in the very back of the library, behind one of the last rows of shelves. You wouldn’t know they were there unless you went looking. 
He said it’s where he goes to hide when James and Sirius won’t shut up and let him work, which is more often than not. 
“You whined about me making new friends,” Sirius says, “so that I’d leave you alone, and now you’ve taken it upon yourself to steal said friend from me?” 
You cover your face with your book, sliding deeper into your chair and trying your very best to fight off a giggle. 
Sirius reaches across the table and snatches the book from your hands. He wants to see the shit-eating grin you’re hiding. He stands and moves in front of you just when you bury your face in your sleeve. 
He tugs on the fabric of your shirt. “Traded me out then, have you?”
You snort into your sweater, and Sirius watched the way your shoulders shake. Remus eyes his friend’s hand, trying to make sure he didn’t lose your page with his frenzied antics. He didn’t though, pale thumb tucked into the paper.
Remus sets his own book down, stretching over the back of the chair. He’s thinking about going to bed. 
Instead of looking at Sirius like you know he wants, you turn to Remus.
“Leavin’ me, Rem?”
Sirius scoffs. Rem his ass. 
Remus lowers his head so that it’s level with yours. “Sleepy,” he says, squeezing his eyes shut. You look at the scar that runs through his brow and across his eyelid. There’s another by his ear. You wonder if he’ll tell you about them someday. 
He bumps his forehead—the gentlest of taps—with yours, and then he’s standing. Sometimes you forget how lanky he is when he’s always so hunched over. 
“Goodnight, Lupin,” you say. 
“Goodnight, you two. Don’t get too wild. This is still a library.”
Sirius takes the chair Remus had been occupying. You look at him, and reach for his hand. He wouldn’t even think about denying you taking it, even if he is being a grump. 
“I have not traded you out, Sirius.” He glares at you, though his eyes are still much too soft for it to be anything malicious. He’s not sure he could ever look at you in a hateful way. 
“You could’ve read with me,” he argues, tickling your palm. You try and wriggle your hand away, but he only presses his fingers firmly into your skin, keeping you there. 
“Come on.”
“No, you could have,” he continues. “I can be very well behaved, if need be.”
“Oh yeah?” You’re the one smirking now. Sirius is afraid he might never get this image of you out of his head. 
“Yeah.” He leans in, nuzzling his nose against your temple. When he pulls away, you realize he has a smattering of freckles under one eye. You have the urge to touch them, and so you do. 
He relaxes against your hand. “You’re very pretty, Sirius.”
“Thank you.” He kisses your knuckle. “You’re very pretty, too, sweets.”
“Thank you.”
In the weeks since your Mandrake project has finished—and the plant did indeed survive—Sirius has grown increasingly attached to you. Frankly he finds himself shocked that you’re willing to deal with him at all, let alone that his friends like you so much. He wasn’t even a little upset that you’re spending time with Remus. You have a lot in common, actually. 
He just likes to tease you. And he’s very good at it. 
“So you come looking for me because you need something? Or are you perhaps attention starved?” You question, taking your hand away from his face, though your other is still within his grasp. 
“Most definitely the latter.”
“What do you want me to do about it?”
He speaks close to your ear as if he’s about to spill the world’s most confidential information. “Is this a safe space?”
“Absolutely,” you assure him. 
“I want you to play with my hair,” Sirius says. 
You gasp, clutching at your nonexistent pearls. 
Your moment's pause makes him a little nervous. “Well let’s get on with it then,” you tell him.
You take Sirius up to your common room, it being much too late for anyone to be up. You slip your fingers into his hair, scratching at his scalp until he’s falling asleep and you’ve made promises of braiding it sooner or later. Eventually, you have to wake him, send him off to bed.
And he pouts. God, does he pout. But it’s okay. He’ll get you to do it again tomorrow.
————
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