#more time in the job to get established plus I’d come back during the summer (chill relaxed time) instead of mid semester

[whentherewerebicycles]

ruthie slowly realizing I have the front camera turned on 😂 this dog hates being photographed!

we were up for a bit at 5 but it was too early and I was sleeepy so ended up dozing for another hour or two. rainy morning here. I’m trying to really savor the cozy snuggly days as life is about to get so hectic for me:

I’m in pittsburgh friday morning through monday night (YAYYY) attending two weekend games and hanging out with bec!!!

I have tuesday to run errands and do laundry before my mom arrives wednesday

we leave early thursday morning for 14 days in japan and korea, during which we are hitting tokyo, osaka, kyoto, nara, mt koya, hiroshima, miyajima island, fukuoka, busan, daegu, and /seoul… I’m soooo psyched but also 🫠 it’s gonna be a whirlwind and I still have to do quite a bit of prep to be ready

we get home on a wed, I have thurs to recover from jetlag slash finalize my job talk, and then friday is the all-day campus visit

THEN I leave sat morning for houston and get back late monday night

it’s gonna be a lot!!! so very okay to be slothful this weekend and for as much of next week as I can manage I think. I am building up my reserves of rest and solitude lol.

mmkay. tonight I am having dinner + watching tár with mary later (and maybe seeing my sister at some point in the afternoon tbd) but the morning is my own! no pressure to get anything done in particular but here are some options:

could do more campus visit research for fun! my first gen programming book is arriving sometime today so I could read that and take notes, or I could spend some more time working through these articles I pulled up on designing programming for transfer students. I was also thinking it might be fun to create some one-page idea/vision/notes docs by hand on various topics—I feel like writing by hand will reinforce my memory of key details, and then making decisions about how I want to visually organize/arrange content will be a good exercise in synthesizing what I’ve learned. lol even as I’m typing this out I’m like ‘OOOOH that sounds like fun!!!!’ so I guess I’ll probably do that.

my former student is calling me at some point today to talk about transfer students’ experiences. he’s around my age (went back to undergrad after serving in the military for a long time) and is fun to talk to because he’s super smart and just like… more of a fully formed person and professional than the college-age kids. so that will be fun and should give me some useful threads to follow in my research. 

pick up my CVS prescription

hmm maybe I’ll put my laundry in right now? I also want to change linens/towels. I cleaned most of the house yesterday so don’t have much else to do in the way of chores… and I have a bunch of leftovers to finish before I’m allowed to make anything else so no cooking to do today either.

if it clears up I’ll go for a shorter long walk (the hourlong loop?) unless it’s really nice and I feel like doing the 90+ min trek again. not gonna let myself run today though—I can tell I pushed it a bit yesterday with the long fast walk + running two days in a row at a quicker clip than usual. just a little bit of achiness!

I finished a novel yesterday and want to start the next one today so I don’t break stride, but that can wait till before bed unless I’m moved to read earlier.

mmkay I think that’s it! take it easy and do fun relaxing stuff today.

[achubbydumpling]

[unfinished] Pile It On

Rating: Explicit

Words: 1561

Relationship: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers

Additional Tags: Established Relationship, Not underage, Fat camp, Stuffing, Weight Gain, Fat!Bucky

So, I had a great conversation with @wotvagyok about my fat camp AU Bucky and what might've led to Bucky breaking a bed like I mentioned in this ficlet. Thanks for the inspiration!

(I'm sorry, I can't think anymore right now. I'll fill in the spaces tomorrow, but if I don't publish this right now I'll probably not finish this challenge at all.)

“Team Cap sets up their attack, Wanda touches, high ark to Wilson, Rogers is probably their best chance at winning… but, no, Wilson sets for Barnes, is that the right decision? Let’s see if he can even get off the ground to—Barnes kills it! Stark can’t block that and with that his team is out! 21-19! A neck-and-neck race all the way. Congratulations, Team Cap!” Thor excitedly commentates jumping up from the beach.

The entire team piled onto Bucky to hug him and scream in his ear. Steve gave him a very bro-hug, grinning wide and shouting at Bucky.

“That jump was insane!” Steve yelled at him again.

“You’ve said that.” Bucky’s cheeks ached from how much he was smiling.

“I know!” Steve said in the same tone of voice, then squeezed Bucky tightly one last time and quietly added, “See you after lunch” with pointedly raised eyebrows, like Bucky wouldn’t immediately get what he was hinting at.

Read on AO3

They’d worked out a pretty good system over the past few summers. Plus, Bucky knew that quiet tone of voice all too well and Steve basically saying out loud that he’d sneak away to Bucky’s cabin in his lunch break? For a second everything outside of those words and Steve’s body pressed against him faded away.

However, the chatter of all the other campers came crashing back into Bucky’s consciousness when Steve turned away and started directing the other campers to the dining hall like he didn’t just—

Breathe, Barnes, he chastised himself and made his (very sore) legs to the dining hall. Scarf down the bland food, charm (beg) his way into seconds, head to the cabin and eat whatever Steve stashed there during his morning “contraband” sweep.

[...]

“Yeah, to make sure no one would find everything. Why didn’t you check the top bunk?”

“It says on the bed post the top bunk is only rated for 300 pounds?”

“Oh. Well, you don’t weigh that much more.”

“Yeah, just like 100 pounds.” Another cramp from his overstuffed belly forced a groan out of him. “Feels like double that right now.” Steve quirked his eyebrow and flicked his eyes at the ladder to the top bunk. Steve’s blue eyes darkened with the fantasy he was clearly playing out in his head right now. The air punched out of Bucky’s lungs.

“What if I break it?” he whispered. He couldn’t force himself to speak up. This— Sure, a flimsy chair had broken under the weight he’d piled on, but a bed? He’d have to tell someone. A sickeningly hot twist of pleasure raced down his spine. He’d have to admit out loud—

“Go on,” Steve interrupted his thought process, pushing Bucky to say that out loud.

“I’d— Fuck, I’d have to tell a counsellor. They’d probably take me to see Fury.” Steve swallowed drily.

“Why would they take you to the director?” Steve’s hands were clenched in fists on Bucky’s gut, belly rub forgotten for the moment.

“Get me weighed.” Steve nodded encouragingly, whispering “Why?”

“If I broke it now— Must’ve gained weight.” Bucky whined low in his throat and grabbed uselessly at the expanse of his belly before him.

“You’ve been here three weeks, you really should’ve lost some weight by now.” Steve pushed himself up from where he was sitting next to Bucky and straddled him. He pushed both his hands into the fat overhang spilling over his waistband and heaved Bucky’s belly up. Muscles and tendons working in his forearms.

“But I can barely lift this thing up.” Steve teased, then let go, letting all the fat slap back onto Bucky’s legs. That jostled his overstuffed gut so badly, Bucky wanted to curl into himself, but he was effectively immobilized by the weight of his gluttony.

The heat of his humiliation sparked his arousal like tinder. He was achingly hard. Trapped against his own fat. Twitching. Trying to rut into that friction. Steve shoved his hand between his fat pad and the fat hanging over it to blindly grab for his dick. When he found that bit of hardness, he squeezed. Tight.

“Not yet. You eat what I give you.” Bucky screwed his eyes shut and shook his head.

“Can’t,” he whined, shook his head again. Steve’s unyielding grip kept Bucky from coming all over himself at just imagining himself crawling up there and eating even more.

“Yes.” The command pierced through Bucky’s middle, making him squirm.

[...]

Dry heat raced through his core, having him press his hand over his dick. He was riding that edge so violently he felt like he should be coming all over his own fingers, but his briefs were still only stained by that spot of precum.

“Oh, fuck, get down here. You just— Bucky!” Steve was scrambling at his back, helping him back down the ladder. Once he was firmly back on the floor, Steve plunged his hand into Bucky’s briefs. Mouth on his neck. Other hand on Bucky’s sweat-slicked sides.

Steve jerked him fast and inelegantly, but Bucky didn’t care in that moment. Too consumed by the realisation that he’d gained enough weight to break the top bunk without even putting his full weight on it. Steve gasping, “you cracked the slats,” finally got him over the edge. Coming over Steve’s hands in his brief.

Bucky’s knees finally buckled under him, and Steve manoeuvred him to lie back down on the bottom bunk, which he was also rapidly outgrowing with the amount of calories he was consuming daily. Bucky was still caught up in the afterglow to help Steve much with getting off. He just felt bone-deep tired.

Steve was standing in front of the bed, one arm propped against the frame and resting his forehead against it. Bucky felt impossibly fatter when he let his head fall forward to look at Steve. He could feel his double-chin bunching up around his neck. His body taking up half his field of view.

Bucky couldn’t even see Steve’s hand on his dick, just the repetitive movement of his arm. The way the muscles moved, his right pec flexed and relaxed again and again. His whole body slightly jerking every time he fucked his hips up into his own fist. The bitten-off moans on his lips. All that over Bucky. The milky soft mountain of fat sitting on his upper body. The solid mass of food rounding out his stomach.

Steve’s forehead slipped off his arm and he just let his head hang for a moment. Then snapped up and locked eyes with Bucky. His pupils blown wide, lips bitten raw and coming over his own hand and torso.

Something fluttered and clenched when Steve climbed slowly onto the bed, wiped them both down with Bucky’s discarded shirt and tucked himself into Bucky’s side.

Bucky’s head reeled with a sudden realisation.

“What are we going to do about the bed?” Instead of answering Steve curled further into himself and hummed noncommittally.

“Hey, I’m serious. I don’t want to get kicked out.”

“Slat’s barely cracked, ‘ll tell Fury after end-of-summer check-in. They’re not gonna kick you out.”

“Maybe not, but I don’t think they’ll let me back in next year.” Bucky rubbed at the back of his head. “Maybe you could—I don’t know—come up to my place or something.”

Steve opened his eyes again but didn’t look at Bucky. Instead, he started playing with a loose thread on the comforter.

“One more summer. Then I’ll—” Bucky sighed, his hand found its way into Steve’s hair.

“I know. I know. Degree, then job. Wherever that takes you. Just thought it’d be— We’d have more than like an hour and a handful of moments to enjoy… this.” Bucky gestured very specifically to his middle and did not think about what else he’d like Steve to want. “What if they won’t let me come back next summer? Don’t really think I qualify for the asthma camp across the lake.”

“Fury’s determined to help everyone lose weight and Stark’s stubborn as hell.”

“They’ve failed three years in a row. This time pretty hard. Y’know after breaking camp property because I gainedweight while being here.” Steve stayed quiet for a long moment. They’d had this conversation a few too many times for them not to know all the arguments by now.

“You don’t think the sneaking around’s kinda fun?” Bucky just wanted to sighed. He felt the urge to shake Steve and make him see that Bucky was in this for a whole lot more than sneaking around to fuck like high schoolers.

“Speaking of your time’s up.” Bucky felt Steve moving up, about to lie down on Bucky’s chest and say those familiar words, “just five more minutes, Buck” but when Bucky kept his eyes firmly trained straights ahead the words died in his throat. Steve sat on the edge of the bed for a moment, then pushed himself up with a deep breath.

“Do you want anything special for tomorrow?” Bucky shrugged. His eyes suddenly felt to heavy to keep them open.

“Surprise me.” A barren olive branch.

Steve disappeared into the bathroom and Bucky finally let the sigh, that had been trapped against his chest, out. He stayed on the bed with his eyes closed until Steve padded out of the bathroom, across the cabin and pushed the squeaky door handle down.

“One more summer.”

[sapphirelass]

What family is all about - Weasley FamilyxWeasley!Sister

Hiiiiiii!!! It’s... been a while. Again. Let’s face it, I’ll never be able to post as often as I’d like. I just don’t like rushing stuff, or posting anything I’m not happy with, so...

Anyhow, I LOVED writing for the Weasley family, and I’ll most likely do it again soon. Bill and Charlie are both underrated characters in my opinion and I had a ton of fun letting them ‘shine’ (despite this being a sort of sad story, but that always seems to be where I end up... XD)

Also, I might have to edit this once more, but it’s late, I have not posted in about two weeks and I just want to go to sleep XD That being said, take it for what it is, and I’ll try to correct any grammatical errors later. Good night! <3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Please note:

1: I don’t own any of the gifs used, nor any already established characters, so credit to the authors and original creators - You have done a phenomenal job :)

2: English is not my native language, as I was born and raised in Sweden. I have, however, studied English for almost a decade, so I don’t think it’ll be a problem, I just thought I’d let you know ;)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Word count: ≈ 2800 (they just keep getting longer, don’t they? XD)

Warnings: Light swearing, blood, angst

Enjoy! :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That’s what family is all about 

“How big did his tongue get?”

“It was four feet long before his parents would let me shrink it!”

The sound of laughter was heard from the kitchen as Elwira Weasley entered her childhood home. She worked as an arithmancer, and had been stationed at a research-facility in the northern parts of Sweden for the past few years. Her work took up most of her time, but she had just travelled home to go see the quidditch final with her dad, older brother Bill, twin brother Charlie and all their younger siblings.

“It isn’t funny”, her dad shouted. “That sort of behaviour seriously undermines wizard-muggle relations! I spend half my life campaigning against the mistreatment of muggles, and my own sons-”

“Are just a wee bit too daft to understand that!”

She walked through the door and found her entire family, plus two other people she didn’t know, all sitting or standing around the kitchen table.

“Ellie?!”

Her older brother and twin, with whom she had always been extremely close, both made their way across the room and pulled her into a hug so tight she could barely breathe.

“Blimey! ‘ello Bill, hey Charlie! Long time no see, huh?”

“Certainly!”, their mother exclaimed while pushing the two oldest sons to the side as she tried to get a good look at her grown-up daughter. “Not a single visit since Christmas, Elwira Weasley, we’ve had to do with owls for six months?!”

“Sorry, mum, there’s been a lot of work to do… I thought I’d stay for the rest of the summer though, if that’s okay with you?”

“Of course, dear! Have you eaten yet?”

“No, I’m famished!”

Mrs Weasley went off to get another plate, and Ellie, after greeting everyone and being introduced to Harry and Hermione, took a seat between her dad and youngest brother.

“So Ronald? Had a good term?”

“Err.. Sure? Nothing interesting except for the stuff I wrote to you about, though.”

“Well you’re going into your fourth year now - almost halfway through!” She paused for a moment and turned to her father. “You good dad? You seem a bit… tense?”

Arthur looked up from his plate and sent his daughter a kind smile.

“Don’t worry about it, darling. Hosting the world cup comes with a great deal of problems all with the need to be solved. Admittedly, it’s not really part of my job, but the entire ministry becomes quite chaotic when something like that is days away. I’m a bit stressed, that’s all. How are things up in Scandinavia?”

“They’re… somewhat slow to be honest. There’s so much work to do between like October and February, but in the summer it’s mostly filing and other boring bits of paperwork.”

“Elwira?”, Hermione asked. “Sorry, I’m just curious, what is it that you do? Ron’s never told us…”

“That’s probably cause Ron doesn’t understand what I’m doing”, she smirked, “but of course, I work with, and study, arithmancy which, as you might know, is part of what’s called ‘natural magic’.”

“Great!”, mumbled Ron quietly, making sure only his friends and older sister heard. “Hermione, there are four rules in this house, okay? One: Don’t ask Charlie about dragons, Two: Don’t ask Percy about anything, Three: Don’t ask dad about muggles, and Four: Don’t ask Ellie about her job. Break either and you’ll be stuck listening to a five hour lecture.”

 Hermione didn’t seem to be bored though, so Ellie ignored her brother’s comment and continued. 

“It’s the type of magic that has been studied and worshiped since ancient times and has a very strong connection with nature. The natural phenomena with the strongest affiliation with magic is, while they in themselves have what the muggles would call a ‘scientific explanation’, the northern lights. Meaning it’s only when they’re visible that we can make any significant progress.”

Ellie paused and glanced at the younger girl, trying to see whether she had caught on or not, and was happy when realizing that she had.

“And... “, questioned Hermione, “the northern lights are only visible north of the polar circle and b-”

“Between September and March, exactly… Meaning there’s sadly not that much advanced research that can be done during the rest of the year…”

“It’s still a fascinating subject though. I only started last year, but I love it.”

“I’m glad! At least some people appreciate the wonderful art that is arithmancy, Ronald!”

Ron looked up at the mention of his name and met his sister’s gaze. 

“I just don’t find it interesting”, he said.  

“Right, because you ha-”

Ellie didn’t get to finish her sentence before being interrupted by her twin brother.

“Hey, Ellie? Must have been fun watching the Nordic versus Germany, huh?”

“Oh shut up, Charlie!”, she groaned while putting her head in her hands. “Holy Merlin…” The Nordic National Quidditch team, of which she had become a huge supporter in the last few years, had suffered a HORRENDOUS loss against Germany, and it had certainly not been a fun night. 

Her brother, however, did not shut up, but instead burst out laughing.  

“Charlie, it’s not funny!! You should have been there though… You’d have done a much better job than the stand-in seeker we had.”

“What were the results again? 700-20?”

“... 520 actually”

“520 to??”, Bill said mockingly

“You’re idiots both of you… 520-0, happy now?”

Ellie hadn’t realized that everyone else around the table had been listening in on their conversation, but was made aware when Fred, George, Harry, Ron, Ginny and Arthur began laughing loudly.

“Why is this so funny to everyone? England lost badly too, and neither Romania nor Egypt even qualified to compete?!”

“Yeah...”, began Fred.

“But none of them lost with 520 points.”, finished George, earning himself a furious look from his older sister who stood up and shook her head.

“I’ll go see if mum needs any help…”

~~~~~~

Ellie loved her family, and therefore all her slightly annoying brothers, beyond everything, but being away from them for months and then meeting them all at the same time was TIRING! Having no desire to sleep through the world cup, she decided to go to bed early the night before, and she had barely closed her eyes before she fell asleep...

~~~~~~

“3, 2 ‘shhhh, quiet!”

Ellie took notice of the obnoxiously loud whispers, but it wasn’t enough to fully wake her up.

“We’ve got one more chance, 3, 2, 1, ELLIE!!!!”

She woke up instantly and sent a blast of blue sparks towards her older brother, barely missing him by an inch.

“What ‘ru doing, El? You can’t just go attacking people?!”

He tried to sound angry, but failed miserably, a heartwarming laugh escaping his mouth.

“You bloody idiots?! Why’d you scare me like that? You’re 21 and 23, not five?”

“Brings back memories, doesn’t it? Do you remember-”

“Yes, I do!”. She rubbed her eyes slowly, “‘85, look can you two please let me sleep?”

“Sorry, sis”, said Bill. “We’re leaving in half an hour. The kids and dad left ages ago.”

“Yeah, you don’t want to be late do you? Not when you can cheer for a team that might not loo-”

“Charlie, I swear!”

~~~~~~

The match was fantastic! Ellie would never admit it to her brothers, but it was nice to watch an even one for once. Watching and cheering with her family brought back fond memories of childhood games at the Burrow or Hogwarts, and she realized just how much she had missed actually playing. They stayed up late discussing players and tactics, but eventually their father ushered them all off to bed. 

~~~~~~

“Ellie?”

“Ellie??”

She stirred slightly and pulled the sleeping bag tighter around her.

“Ellie! Damn it, wake up!”

She opened her eyes slowly and saw her twin brother bent above her. The sight made her sigh.

“Charlie”, she mumbled. “We see each other once- or twice a year nowadays, do you really feel obligated to wake me up every time you get the chance?”

“Elwira, I’m serious! Get up!”

This caught her attention. Sure, the twins often used their full names when messing with each other, but it didn’t sound like Charlie was joking at all. She sat up, rubbed the sleep from her eyes and yawned loudly.

“What’s going on? Wha- Charlie? It’s still dark out? Why’d yo-”

“Ellie, c’mon. We have to help dad. Someone’s attacking the muggles.”

He threw his sister a jacket and pulled her out of the tent. Arthur, Bill and Percy were all waiting outside.

“Dad?”, she asked. “What’s happening? Charlie sai-”

“We’ve got to help the ministry!”, he said while frantically trying to count everyone and make sure they were there. “Fred, George, you make sure the others are safe. Go wait in the woods and I’ll come for you when the situation’s under control. Bill, Charlie, Percy, Ellie, let’s see if there’s something we can do.”

Nobody questioned Mr Weasley’s instructions, and immediately left in different directions. There were people everywhere though, and the two directions quickly became three, four, six. Spells and curses were fired left, right and centre and Ellie found herself disarming and stunning at least a few death eaters. There weren’t that many of them, roughly thirty or so, but the insane amount of witches and wizards fleeing the campsite made it difficult to fight back. She couldn’t risk hitting any random bloke.

While duelling a tall man in a black mask, Ellie suddenly stumbled forward, a particularly nasty curse having hit her straight in the back. Falling to the ground felt way more painful than it should have, and her wand landed well beyond her reach. She groaned as a burning pain spread through her lower back, but made an effort to get back up anyways. She did, however, not make it very far before the sharp end of a wand dug into her throat.

The death eater behind her sniggered and pulled her up by the collar of her shirt.

“Well, well, well… Why’re you trying to ruin our fun?”

He stood way too close for comfort and Ellie felt his breath on her neck. She tried to answer, but the curse that was shot at her must have hit its intended target, as all that came out when she opened her mouth was a strained cough and warm blood.

The bloke holding her let out a dark chuckle and threw her to the ground. She could barely keep her eyes open, and a thick, red liquid oozed from the wound in her back.

“Not so high-and-mighty now, are we?”

Ellie lacked the strength to fight back, and to the death eaters that seemed to take all the fun out of the situation. They set off back towards the campsite, leaving Ellie on the ground next to a few pines. She tried her very best to sit up, but ended up passing out…

~~~~~~

“Charlie?!”

Bill ran up to his younger brother and pulled him in for a quick, one-armed hug.

“Charlie, you okay? We’ve got to get back to the tent. Where’s El?”

“Wha-, I-I thought she was with you?!?”

“What? Last I saw her you were together?”

The brothers shared a lock of utter terror.

“Bill, we have to find her!”

“I know… Dad went to get the kids and Percy’s back in the tent waiting.”

“There’s no time to waste then. Let’s go”

~~~~~~

They had been running around the camping grounds for half an hour, and there was still not a trace of a living soul - let alone the special one they were searching for. At first, they had been shouting her name at the top of their lungs, but were now walking silently. That was, at least, until a shout made both of them turn around.

“Bill! Charlie! What are you doing? I told you to stay in the tent?”

Arthur Weasley came running towards them, with Harry, Ron and Hermione following close behind.

“Dad!”, Charlie shouted. “Have you seen El? We can’t find her?”

“What?”, asked Arthur. “But she was with you, wasn’t she?”

“Yes, at first, but we must have gotten separated… Dad, is that? You know?”

He threw a dark glance at the skull and snake decorating the night sky and said, “Yes. Yes it is. Look, I’ll take Ron, Hermione and Harry back to the tent, and I’ll meet you back here in ten minutes, okay? Don’t go too far. Come on kids!”

~~~~~~

Just as the brothers were about to give up, go back to the clearing, wait for their dad and hopefully find both their sisters safe and sound, Bill noticed something. A glimpse of red in the moonlight…

“Charlie? Get over here fast!”

The younger brother followed Bill’s gaze and immediately set off through the forest when his eyes found a mess of ginger hair sticking out from behind a rather large pine. Bill followed closely behind.

“ELLIE!!!?!!”

Charlie stumbled to his knees and turned his sister around, trying to get a better look at her. He pressed his hand to her wrist and breathed a sigh of relief when he found a pulse.

“She’s alive”, he mumbled. “Bill, she’s alive!”

“Good. I- Good.” Bill was lost for words too and mumbled a quick “Let me see”.

He pushed some hair out of her eyes and searched for any clues to what had hit her. He was a curse-breaker after all, but that usually meant working with curses placed on things or places, not people. 

“Charlie, I-I don’t know what that is… it’s not a curse I’m familiar with and I’m no healer… You want to carry her?”

“Of course”

Charlie brought his twin into his arms and picked her up, her bruised, limp body threatening to fall unless he held on tight enough. The brothers walked back to the clearing where they’d promised to meet their dad, but kept a close watch on their sister. They would apparate, though at the moment none of them felt like they had much time for ‘Deliberation’. It wasn’t very far anyways.

~~~~~~

“DAD!”, Bill shouted as soon as they noticed Arthur in the clearing where they were supposed to wait.

“Boys! Didn’t I tell you t-”

“We’ll take that later, Dad, you’ve got to help her!?”

Arthur Weasley was speechless, which had most likely never happened before, and Charlie felt so helpless. This was worse than his worst nightmares, and there was nothing he could do. Had it been a wounded dragon, sure, he knew loads about them, but this?

“Dad?”, asked Bill. “What can we do?”

“Right. Er… I suppose there’s no use trying to get you to wait here?”, he said while looking at Charlie who frantically shook his head. “Right, Bill could you go back to Percy and the kids? Fill them in on what happened? Then Charlie and I’ll take Ellie to St Mungos, okay?”

Bill didn’t look too happy with the idea, but nodded nonetheless.

---

“Charlie sit down!”

“Fred, he can’t”, said George. “Hey, I think you missed a spot over there, Charles”

“Shut it both of you! Honestly, why am I the only one that’s worried?”

Arthur stood up and put an arm around his son.

“Listen, we’re all worried, but walking back and forth isn’t helping anyone. Just sit for a moment, huh?”

“No, dad, you don’t understand! It’s my fault. We were supposed to stick together! I let her out of my sight...I-”

“Charlie, we all-”

“No, Bill, you don’t get it either, I should-”

“-let your sister sleep for once? That’d be greatly appreciated, thank you.”

The entire family turned at once, and found the oldest daughter struggling to sit up.

“EL!!”

Charlie stumbled over and put a hand on his sister’s back, trying to help her up, but unfortunately placing it right where the curse had hit her.

“Auch!”

She moved away from his touch and he pulled his hand back immediately.

“Blimey, Ellie I’m so s-”

“Charlie, it’s good. Don’t worry about it.”

Ellie pulled her brother into a hug, though he was now extremely careful, and she looked over his shoulder at the rest of her family. Her eyes met Bill’s and he sent her a kind smile. She gestured for him to come join them, and eventually the whole family found themselves in a loving group hug. Molly did her very best to wrap her arms around all her children, desperately trying to convince herself that they were all there - safe and sound and loved. 

Because if there was one thing the Weasleys had a lot of, it was love and that is, after all, precisely what family is all about.

~ L

Masterlist

[mrs-nate-humphrey]

aight aight, real shit; let's say you got the chance to rewrite the entirety of gossip girl exactly how you want. make a brief description of what would happen in each season. (you can decide whether there's a fourth season or not)

oh i LOVE this ask, and i am so flattered to be asked this, haha. i have SO many thoughts, i’ve been thinking about this non-stop, but i’ll try to be as brief as possible. also, disclaimer, i don’t remember all the seasons equally clearly. like i barely remember s2. haha, whoops.

season 1: i love this season as is, for the most part. i think the tone of it was actually very serious and involved? like the show was actively trying not to be frivolous with heavy topics, and the way we were getting to see the characters seemed like they were trying to bring out character depth and the complexities of their lives in very deliberate ways. nate’s whole thing with his parents gets so much focus, and it’s not something the show glorifies, it’s something that is meant to make you uncomfortable and worried for him. 

i would have nate be less of a dudebro, jenny & nate’s friendship being a little more solid, dan being a little more involved in jenny’s problems + helping her find her space, vanessa/nate to happen earlier - after nate breaks up w/ blair and realises she looks happier, i would have him not try and get back with her (lol, dude, the fact that she’s happy after breaking up with you means you probably shouldn’t be dating her.) more exploration of eric’s mental health. more dan and blair friendship. i would keep chair the way it is this season. i would not have a derena breakup - i’d have them take a break after the georgina reveal and get back together during the summer after talking about it and deciding to be more honest & open with each other. and, what the hell, i would have lily not blame serena (???) for being taken advantage of in the whole pete fairman situation. serena wasn’t sober, she was 16, that dude was in his 30s, georgina was taping her w/o her consent. how is any of this serena’s fault??? i hate lily’s reaction so much.

season 2: i... don’t remember enough of this season, sadly. it’s been too long since i watched it. i would majorly change jenny’s arc here, though. eleanor stealing her dress was majorly, majorly fucked up, and i think jenny should’ve done something then and there. also the whole thing with ‘lily is a mother to chuck’.... i would’ve loved it if lily had been like that to jenny. the girl needed it, and lily would’ve actually been able to help jenny establish connections in the professional world and whatnot. i think jenny should’ve transferred out of constance - not necessarily homeschooling maybe, but gone somewhere else. unlike dan, she didn’t even want to get into an ivy, she wanted to make it big as a designer. so. that. 

oh nate my love. i’d get this trainwreck of a boy some therapy. while i hate that the catherine thing happened, things like that do happen all the time, and i’d be interested in sort of handling the aftermath of it in a responsible way. i would not have... a lot of serena’s arc and decisions (from what i can remember) were really random in this season. i’d have her break up with dan at some point. and vanessa would need a new subject for her short film, and she’d choose serena.

nate doesn’t really date anyone, this season. but he and jenny open up to each other abt having gay crushes on people who treat you like shit - jenny’s thing with agnes - nate rescues her when they’re taking those pictures in her flat and let’s say she doesn’t go back to agnes. instead of kissing her, nate talks to her instead, and tells her about carter, tells her about chuck. and jenny talks about her feelings for blair, her feelings for agnes. and both of them sort of go... “it sucks, but all we can do is try not to become the kind of people we hate, right?”

dan pines for nate. majorly. massively. obviously. i think the only person who really notices is blair, and this would lead to new hijinks and shenanigans. also!! i do not want chair in s2. maybe it can go there for a bit but definitely not to the extent in canon. i want blair to have the same moment of being unable to deny her cruelty / needing to be accountable that she did in that ‘age of dissonance’ play. and. this sounds fucky but i want the dan/rachel stuff to stay as it is, and later, in s4, for dan & serena to talk about rachel & ben respectively and be like ‘hey, this was a fucked up thing to happen to us, wasn’t it?’ 

i would also like to get to know blair’s “minions” better as people. i mean. they all seemed hella fascinating to me, and the show’s decision to make them superficial and unidimensional was very depressing.

season 3: hot garbage, throw canon away. when chuck goes away to paris or wherever, let him not come back. goodbye, dude! dan, blair & vanessa friendship at nyu is so, so important to me. also im losing my mind always at how vanessa and serena catch dan on that walk of shame and they’re both like ‘college is a time for experimentation!’ and nobody does anything even slightly bisexual (unless you count that threesome later, which, blah.) a serenessa / date dynamic in college would’ve been great. dan transferring to columbia like blair does and rooming with nate and just, the gayness of it all. dan & blair become really, really close, and d&b&v watch movies + go to art exhibits together and are all SO DAMN PRETENTIOUS. serena finds it sexy, nate finds it terrifying. 

the william stuff would be interesting if he were actually held accountable. like that man has no right being a doctor, and medical malpractice needs to be brought up. and jenny’s whole arc this season makes me so sad. i think it would’ve been interesting if she’d been a ‘queen’ and ruled alongside eric, and just, the two of them forcing people to be nice, sort of like they try to do with people who are mean to nelly in s2 i think it is? but also.. jenny out of constance is very good, and i think i mentioned that earlier, haha, whoops.

season 4 : serenessa breakup, for whatever reason, probably to do with the william fuckery, because i think vanessa would react in similar ways to nate (”serena, i know he’s your dad, but we have to do the right thing” / “it still wasn’t your call to make” / “he’s a certified doctor, serena, a man like that has no right -” / “god vanessa, you really don’t get it, do you?” ). uhhh i would actually... if i had to choose i would honestly go blairnessa >>>>> dair. i love how blair & vanessa can keep each other on their toes and hold each other accountable. like? blair’s classist or racist and dan’s just like, *smiles*. vanessa would actively be like ‘hey, stop that.’ (this is one of the few actual criticisms i have about d/b as a relationship, RIP.) 

(edited to add: yeah, i think blairnessa WOULD be a sustainable relationship, more abt that here! )

yes to the milo arc, but dan gets to keep milo (his friends threaten georgina and go all ‘you made him sign the certificate. don’t make us take you to court’ because i love these morally grey assholes but also because g DID trick dan into thinking milo was his and dan was ready to reshape his whole life around that kid which is more than georgina was willing to do. plus endgame: jack/georgina are not parents i want milo to have.) i would also have more of a rufus & dan fallout over the milo thing. i think rufus would be really nasty about it all tbh.

the dair arc for blair and vanessa! let the juliet stuff happen, but let it be less awful + let it be seen as Bad + let serena get help & not forgive her for it. let serena NOT date ben after, what the hell. i want d&s to talk about their shared feelings for high school teachers and to realise, in retrospect, as adults, that what happened was crossing lines. let blair and vanessa suddenly drop dan and do the movies + galleries stuff on their own. and dan’s like ??? but he’s busy being a parent with nate supporting him. dan’s drama is very much parenting things. there would be some nonsense involving nate’s family pushing back, because ‘we stood by while you dated him, nate, we thought it was a phase. but raising a child with another man? this is unacceptable.’ i would like nate to get disowned by the family, and need to find his own feet. and to get a REAL SHOT AT HAPPINESS away from that terrible environment.

season 5: i want this to be a good serena season. let her find her calling doing creative things. let her and carter travel the world. let her just be whoever she wants to be. let her and vanessa patch their friendship up. let her have an open relationship with carter, let her have a lot of sex with a lot of random people and not feel guilty about it. let her really really blossom. i want more eric! maybe he’s in london with jenny, and she’s working on her fashion stuff, and he’s realising that he really wants to be a counsellor. 

some time-skips, maybe. i really want to see dan’s whole thing of being a parent. sending milo to kindergarten and spending the whole time milo’s gone on edge and anxious about everything that could go wrong, while nate comforts him. let nate try to get a job because he no longer has a trust fund, and navigate everything that comes with that. let vanessa be there for him. why the fuck am i phrasing my sentences like this - can you tell that i studied physics once?? oh well.

blair & vanessa handling a lot of things. vanessa meeting harold!! vanessa’s parents being disapproving of blair, but ruby standing up for her. blair & vanessa planning their future properly. blair & vanessa babysitting milo and talking about kids. 

and there can be drama too, there should always be drama. but i would like wholesome stuff at the centre of it too, you know? the ivy/lola nonsense can go on in the background, i don’t actually care that much. as long as ivy doesn’t go around fucking people’s fathers for no understandable or discernable reason, i don’t really care lkdhlfdkhg. (it was just so inexplicable and so random!)

season 6: uh, i don’t know. this was a bad season for everyone in canon, except chuck. i would throw it all away. i would actually love if we had pre-series rufly instead: every time those two bring up their past together i’m like 👀 because it sounds like a dream. or focus entirely on jenny and eric and their life. i am obsessed with jenny and eric being... sort of queerplatonic, sort of like, best friends. there’s no romance and no sex between them (eric’s canonically gay, and jenny’s a lesbian because i said so) but i think the way jenny and eric are is very, very life partners in a way that isn’t romantic OR sexual. so they’d have a little place together and would support each other. and just. what are they up to now? also. kati, iz, penelope, hazel, nelly... what r they doing now? one of the few things i actually liked about s6 as it was was that nelly was that reporter and that she’d found her people in yale. nelly yuki getting a happy and fulfilling ending and being a successful woman was so good and we actually got a little bit of that. i’d like more of that, for the rest of the girls, you know?

[solavillain]

Pas de Deux Ch. 10, Epilogue: Here We Are In The Future

+pairing: Spinel x fem!Reader +genre: Drama, romance, angst, slow burn, enemies to friends to lovers +warnings: none +word count: 7.8K +Chapter 10 / 10 previous || FIN

Read on AO3!

Authors Note: Well, here we are, guys. 61 thousand+ words later, the end of Pas de Deux. So, again, thank you. And enjoy this last chapter of Pas de Deux <3

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The weeks following your return hadn’t exactly been easy. Everyone needed a while to adjust... especially Spinel. Bismuth had been kind enough to offer Spinel an apartment in Little Homeworld, but... well, she wasn’t quite ready to be on her own yet, especially around so many strangers. Not that you could blame her, of course. You knew there would need to be a time in the future where she worked on these things, but for now you were happy to get her through the hardest parts. So for now she had been staying in your little summer rental just off the boardwalk. It was downright cozy, and god was it nice to sleep in a bed again. In fact, after everything had been settled after those first few days back, you and spinel had barely left the apartment. You spent a lot of time catching up on sleep and hygiene, and Spinel seemed to spend her time... relishing in the fact that she could be there, holding you.

After a week or so, you had decided you needed to pick up the café job once more in order to be a basic human adult and pay rent. Thankfully both your landlord and boss had been forgiving about the whole being kidnapped situation, and gratefully your boss took you back on board. It took a little bit to get back in the swing of things, but you adjusted pretty well. And surprisingly, Spinel had begun to adjust too. You had been concerned with what she would do while you were working shifts, especially longer ones. But she was perfectly content to accompany you, sitting at a table in the corner, perusing through a book from your apartment or learning how to use your phone that you would lend her if she didn’t feel like reading (a phone Greg had graciously paid for a week or so after your return, despite your protests- you had lost it sometime between the injector flooding the city and Spinel grabbing you).

There were times you could tell she felt awkward, especially if Steven or one of the other Crystal Gems came in. Though it was usually just Steven or Amethyst, as Garnet and Pearl still seemed hell-bent on avoiding the two of you. Whenever Steven or Amethyst came in, you could see Spinel visibly recoil, trying to hide herself even further into the corner of the room. You often wondered if Steven would ever try to talk to Spinel... or if anyone would, for that matter.

Fortunately, you hadn’t had to worry about that for too long. It probably shouldn’t have surprised you that Lapis, Bismuth and Peridot- AKA the “Attack Steven” team- had been fairly quick to forgive Spinel after all was said and done. Once Little Homeworld construction had finished, they had started visiting the café, and Peridot was quite quick to notice Spinel there every time they came in. Eventually they had all started sitting down with her for a few hours, a couple times a week. From what Spinel told you, it seemed like they mostly talked about Earth things; Peridot insisting on showing the pink Gem how the phone worked, even though you had already taught her a lot of the basics. But you could tell Spinel was perfectly happy to let them talk to her and show her things- you could imagine it was a huge relief that she wasn’t being shunned completely.

It was such a great feeling to see her there, while you were working, whether she was alone or with the New CG’s. Especially during busier times... you would glance up at her, and she would meet your eyes and give a smile, and your heart would start pounding so loudly you were sure the customers in line could hear it. You’d catch her staring at you sometimes too, when she thought you were busy. It was nice to know that even back here, around everyone, she still cared for you like she had on your island of paradise.

And honestly, that’s how you had come to think of your stay with Spinel. It hadn’t begun in the best of ways, and there were definitely hardships, but... you couldn’t help but be secretly grateful that she’d chosen to take you to that island. Despite everything, she had grown from the experience, and you had learned just how much you meant to each other. You could see why the others would be weirded out by it...but you didn’t care.  It was still new, especially being back in Beach City- but you were learning together, like you’d promised.

As the weeks went on, and Spinel followed you around to your shifts, you couldn’t help but start to grow worried that she might be becoming too attached. You didn’t mind having her around of course, but you knew you had to establish boundaries early on. There was always a concern in the back of your mind that she would start to view you like she viewed Pink Diamond, and not as an equal...

Luckily, Spinel solved the issue herself, before you even had to mention it. One day as she walked with you to work in the early morning, she stopped short outside the café, gazing up at the overhanging sign above the shop.

“Spins? Everything all right?” you had asked, turning back once you had noticed she stopped.

“Y-yeah, I just... I don’t know if I want to sit around all day today,” she replied, sounding slightly put off by the prospect.

“Oh! Hey, that’s totally fine! Spinel, you don’t have to wait around for me for all of my shifts... I thought you were doing it because you were too nervous to walk around on your own, honestly.”

“Well, at first that’s what it was... plus I wanted to be close to ya,” she said with a wink, snaking an arm around your shoulders and pulling you closer.

“But after a while I just... thought it made you feel better, having me around where you can see me? And make sure I’m not... doin’ anything I shouldn’t be doing, or somethin’,” she continued, mumbling the last part slightly.

“Hmm... well, I understand where you’re coming from,” you had replied tentatively, wanting to phrase everything correctly, “but I do trust you, just so you know. And I don’t want you to feel like you’re stuck in one place- or that I’m making you wait for me.”

You gave her a pointed look, and she gave a nervous smile in return, removing her arm from your shoulders to scratch the back of her head.

“Heh, you’re not making me wait, doll. It’s just my own conflicting feelings getting' the better of me I guess. But!” she interjected suddenly, causing you to startle slightly, “Now that I’ve told ya, think it would be ok for me to check out some other places around town? Bismuth has been wantin’ me to visit Little Homeworld so they can show me around properly, and take me to that apartment they reserved for me. I still want to stay with you if that’s ok... but it would be neat to see everything!”

She beamed down at you with gleaming eyes, an excited grin growing on her face the more she talked.  

“How can I say no to that face?” you had replied, reaching up to kiss her cheek. “That sounds fun, Spins. Really, you should feel free to do whatever you want with your time! And on my next day off we can explore together?”

“Of course! Peridot and the others want to show you around, too!”

You raised your eyebrows at this- it was the first you had heard of it. Before everything had happened, Amethyst had been the one to suggest giving you a tour... but aside from her slightly stilted visits to the café, you hadn’t heard about her wanting to continue that plan. So hearing that the New Crystal Gems wanted to show you around... well, if the others were going to snub you, maybe you could find a new friend group to hang out with.

“I’d love that,” you replied earnestly, taking her hand in yours to give it a quick squeeze. “But alas, for now I must go work. And you go have fun!”

Spinel grinned once more, and gave you a quick tight hug before racing off down the boardwalk. “Have a good day, doll! I love you!”

Your heart had leapt at her words- you would never get tired of hearing that sentence from her. Since that first time you had said it to each other, it had been used sparingly. You suspected Spinel didn’t want to diminish the meaning of the words by saying it so often, and you were fine taking things slow in that regard. Still... your heart swelled with more love for her with each passing day, more than you ever thought possible.

You shook your head and smiled, watching her figure retreat into the distance. Time for another long shift... hopefully the lack of Spinel wouldn’t have much of an effect on the day.

From then on, for the next few weeks, Spinel would walk you to work whenever you had a shift, send you off with a hug and a kiss, and then just... live her life. She often went to Little Homeworld, especially when you had a morning shift and got off in the afternoon. But the few times you had an evening shift, you would get off work and find a text from her waiting:

On the beach. Can’t wait to see you.

Every time you saw that text- and it was always the same- your heart soared. Months ago, you couldn’t have imagined that such a simple thing would send you into such a state, but... Spinel was special. God, was she special.

After you found her on the beach on those nights, the two of you would just sit and hold each other, watching the waves, or the lingering beach goers, or often times staying to watch the sun set. Spinel couldn’t seem to get enough of you during these moments- she would position you between her legs, letting you lean back on her. She would shudder and sigh when your back rested on her gem, and even though it was uncomfortable sometimes, you knew this level of contact meant so much to her, so you happily sat through the slight discomfort. If it meant making your girl happy... you’d do anything.

As you sat in silence, your mind would often wander to the future, though you had been trying to avoid stressing about it for the most part. But the end of summer was coming up- you had a little less than a month left before you’d have to go back to Empire City to finish off your senior year of college. Part of you wanted to just... skip it all, and live here with the Gems, and more importantly, with Spinel. But you knew you had to do this, and besides, you were pretty passionate about what you were majoring in.  

Tonight was one such night- you'd had an evening shift, and had met Spinel on the beach as usual, finding her near the surf looking for shells. The instant she saw you her eyes brightened, and the backdrop of the setting sun made her almost glow. Your heart felt so full as you settled into the sand for your routine, Spinel encircling her arms around you and letting you get comfortable.

But as the time passed, your mind drifted to thoughts of the future once more, stressing about all the change that was going to happen. You let out an unconscious sigh, sinking further into Spinel’s embrace. She leaned her head down onto your shoulder, planting a kiss on your cheek.

“You all right doll? You’re rather pensive tonight,” she remarks, whispering softly next to your ear.

“Ah, I’m fine, hon, don’t worry about me. Just a long day,” you fib. You could hold off talk about the future for a little while longer... you had time. Just not as much of it as you would like.  

“Mmm... ok. I love you,” she replies, nuzzling into the crook of your neck. You shiver at the closeness, and at her words. You let the calm wash over you and clear your thoughts, deciding to not stress about things you can’t control. It was just you and Spinel tonight, and you were perfectly content with that.

The next morning, Spinel walks you to work as normal, and you expect her to rush off to Little Homeworld as usual- her and the New CG’s had become quite close, which you loved. You still hadn’t had the opportunity to go see them between work and spending alone time with Spinel, but you were hoping to change that before the summer ended.

Today though, Spinel seemed to linger longer than normal, holding you tight to her chest.

“Spinel? You all right?” you ask, muffled by her body pressed to you.

“Huh? Oh, yeah, sorry doll. Just uh... mind if I sit in the café again today? You’ve been working so much lately and I kinda miss ya...”

Your heart swells and you squeeze the pink Gem tighter before pulling back to look up at her.

“Of course you can, hon. You can do whatever you feel like, you know that. Besides, I’ve been missing you too a bit. I always love when you hang out here.”

You grin at each other, and walk in together. You give Spinel’s hand a quick squeeze before heading to the back to get ready for the day. Luckily today was a shorter shift, even if it was an early one- only about five hours, so you’d be out by the afternoon. Plenty of time to spend the rest of the day with your favorite person.  

You busy yourself cleaning and getting the machines ready for the inevitable rush of customers that will show up soon. You watch Spinel take her usual place in the corner, pulling out a book stored in her Gem. You smile at the sight, face flushing when she glances up to meet your eyes and give you a radiant smile in return.

Not wanting to be reprimanded for being distracted, you turn back to what you had been doing, and sure enough, more and more customers start trickling in for the morning rush. The time thankfully passes quickly, and by the time the rush slows, you’re halfway through your shift. The bell dings as the last customer for the time being leaves, and you slump against the counter, hanging your head down for a moment. While the influx of customers may help time pass, it’s definitely hard work.

The bell dings once more, signaling someone else entering the shop. You groan quietly before lifting your head, prepared to give a cheery greeting.

“Y/n!”

Steven exclaims happily before you can say anything, and you grin at the teenager, before your eyes slip past him to the threshold where three more Gems enter.

“Oh...hi, guys!” you call out awkwardly, before your gaze flicks to Spinel, who has turned her head away from the front of the store, a slight blush on her face.  You can only hope she’s okay with seeing all of the Crystal Gem’s in the same place at once...

“Do you have a minute?” Steven asks, shooting you a hopeful smile.

You nod and take off your apron, and let your coworkers know that you’re taking your break now. You walk around to the other side of the counter and motion them over to the side of the store, waiting to hear what they have to say.

“Hello, Y/n. We just wanted to stop by to tell you about the party we’re having on the beach tonight,” Garnet says softly, “and to invite you to join us.”

“A-and Spinel too!” Amethyst interjects, glancing over to the pink Gem in the corner. Spinel jolts at the mention of her name, and stands up slowly, slinking her way to the front to stand next to you. You notice she avoids meeting anyone’s eyes, until she takes your hand and seems to gain some courage from your presence.

“Why now?” she asks, voice lower than normal. You raise your eyebrows and squeeze her hand as a warning- you don’t want to cause any more of a rift between you and the Gems.

“Everyone’s coming who can make it, and...well, I haven’t gotten to throw one of these parties for a while. Y/n, you’ve been to a few of them I think?” Steven replies, giving you a small smile.

You return it and nod, trying to be as relaxed as possible. “Yeah, and that was back before we had so many new people and Gems in town... this must be a pretty big party you’re planning!”

You glance up to Spinel and she meets your eyes, her gaze softening slightly.

“It sounds really fun, Steven. I know I want to go... what about you, Spins?” you ask her.

She meets the eyes of each Gem in turn, before looking to Steven last, who wears a hopeful look.

“Yeah...yeah, let’s go,” Spinel sighs, conceding finally. You catch a small smile on her face as everyone celebrates quickly before heading out.  

“She must have been relieved to be included,” you muse, watching her watch the Gems leave. You turn your gaze from Spinel to Pearl as you notice her linger in the doorway, back turned. She hadn’t said a word this whole time, mostly keeping to the back behind Garnet.  

But she turns back to face you before leaving, and simply says, “I’m...glad you’re coming. Both of you.”

Before you can reply, she darts out quickly, leaving the café empty once more except for the workers and Spinel.

You sigh and turn to your girlfriend, who is staring at the front door.  

“You all right?” you ask softly, circling your arms around her waist and gazing up at her.

“Y-yeah, just... hadn’t expected all of ‘em to show up for the invitation,” she replies, still gazing absentmindedly to the front of the store.

You tilt your head quizzically. “Did you know we were gonna be invited?” you ask.  

She finally tears her gaze back to you and raises her brows. “Oh! Well, yeah, Peri and the others mentioned it a few days ago...Sorry, I didn’t think to tell you. I guess I just figured Steven would just tell you while getting his coffee, or somethin’.”  

You smile and shake your head, taking a couple steps to stand next to her. “I’m not mad or anything.  I’m glad you weren’t surprised by it for the most part, and I’m glad you agreed to go!”

You turn to her and take her hands, being sure to look her right in the eyes. “I know this is a big step for you, love. For both of us. We haven’t... exactly been a couple around everyone yet, but I’m excited to show everyone how much I love you...”

Suddenly Spinel pulls you in tight, causing your face to almost smash against her gem. Luckily you react in time and move your head over. The hazards of dating a Gem...

“That means so much to me, Y/n. Thank you. I want... I want to be braver for you. You make me want to try.”

You press your face into her shoulder, trying to hold back the tears that her words threaten to bring. You’re at work, after all. No crying on the job.  

Once you’ve calmed yourself in her embrace, you pull back and beam up at the Gem you’ve come to love.

“You’re already the bravest person I know, Spinel.”

x * x * x * x * x

That night, after getting ready at your apartment in your nicest summer clothes (and after working through some of the butterflies with Spinel), the two of you head over to the other side of town. Steven always throws a great end of summer party, but you are not prepared for the sight you see as you round the corner.  

A giant dance floor lays on the sand, much like the one present for Garnet’s wedding way back when. Not that you had been there, since you had still been finishing up college finals at the time, but you had seen pictures and heard Steven talk about it enthusiastically.

But this...this was much bigger. In front of the dance floor was a stage set up with all the latest equipment, where Sour Cream was currently DJing- and by the looks of it, Sadie Killer would be coming on at some point later. A little ways from the music area, Greg, Lapis, and Peridot were helping set up the food station, which looked to be a giant buffet accompanied by some good old fashioned barbeque. Your mouth waters with the smells that waft over to you on the sea breeze.

“Whaddya say, doll? Wanna go mingle?” Spinel asks, taking your hand.  

“She’s definitely different from the scared and angry Gem I first met...” you think happily. You nod in response and she leads you past the dance floor towards Lapis and Peridot, who turn and smile as they see the two of you approaching.

“Spinel! Y/n! You’re just in time for sustenance!” Peridot calls out in her raspy voice.  

“Oh yeah? What do you guys have for us today?” you ask, greeting them with a smile.

“Just the basics, stuff we normally like to grow. Corn, potatoes, the usual,” Lapis answers, “and I think Greg and Steven are working on the main courses on the grill!”

“Yeah, it smells delicious!” you reply with a grin, glancing past the buffet table to the multiple grills set up that the father and son are manning (with the help of a few other Gems).  

“Maybe I’ll finally try some food,” Spinel banters, half-joking. “Really though, it all looks so... fun! Nothing like the few Homeworld balls I got to go to...”

Lapis scoffs and rolls her eyes good naturedly. “Well, trust me. You’ll have much more fun here. But it can get pretty loud and busy. So don’t feel bad if you get overwhelmed- I know I did the first few times we did something like this.”

Spinel nods and looks gratefully at her new friend. “Thanks, Lapis. Still, I’m pretty excited to check everything out...”

She trails off and eyes the dance floor, making you chuckle.

“All right, dork, you wanna dance?” you ask fondly. She nods eagerly and starts to pull you away.  

“We’ll talk to you later, guys!” you call to Lapis and Peridot as Spinel drags you off. They share a knowing glance and wave, leaving you to follow Spinel.

“Kinda eager, aren’t we?” you ask, raising an eyebrow as Spinel leads you to the base of the stage.

“Well... last time we were at a concert together, I wasn’t exactly myself. And I didn’t get to dance with ya,” she replies, bending down to whisper close to your ear, “and you just look so damn good in that outfit... I wanna show everyone you’re mine, dollface.”

You flush immediately, and pull back to look up at Spinel.  

“H-hey now, no teasing...” you reply, ducking your face away from her gaze.

“Heh. Fine,” she smirks, clearly happy with your reaction. “But I still wanna dance with you, toots.”

She grabs your hands and spins you to face her once more, a grin on her face that is entirely too smug for your liking. You roll your eyes, but can’t help but smile. It’s nice to see her putting herself out there, after all. Even if it means suffering a little PDA.

The two of you dance to Sour Cream’s techno rave beats for a while, though you wouldn’t consider yourself much of a dancer. Spinel seems to think otherwise, though. She smiles happily every time you let yourself get lost in the music, and eventually you stop caring about what anyone thinks. Spinel does her own form of dance, being the limber Gem that she is. She tries to copy some of your moves, and actually succeeds with the majority of them, probably making it look better than you could.   Well. She is an entertainer, after all.

Around the twenty minute mark you’re starting to get a bit sweaty (and hungry), but luckily Sour Cream announces a break in the music- Steven has just informed him that the barbeque is ready. You and Spinel rush over with about half of the guests from the dance floor, mostly all human, and get in line for a plate.

“Damn, this looks amazing!”

You turn at the gravelly voice that sounds out behind you and grin.

“Hey Amethyst! Fancy seeing you here!”

The purple Gem nudges you and winks before saying, “And who’s your hot date, huh?”

Spinel flushes a deep magenta and shifts behind you, as if trying to hide. Not that she’s hidden at all- she's a good head taller than you.

You glance over your shoulder and give her what you hope to be a comforting smile. “She’s just teasing, Spins. She knows you’re mine.”

You turn back to Amethyst and cock an eyebrow. “Right?”

“Pff. Duh, nerd! Once you get past the whole trying to destroy the earth thing...and the kidnapping thing... you guys are pretty cute together.”

“Y-yeah?” Spinel asks tentatively, stepping back to your side once again and clasping your hand in hers.

“Yeah! I saw you on the dance floor. You were really tearing it up. Both of you,” Amethyst replies with a laugh. “Spinel, you gotta teach me your moves some time. Maybe later tonight?”

She smiles calmly up at Spinel, whose eyes widen as she grins hesitantly back at the purple Gem.

“I think you’ll have to loosen up a bit more,” she replies, wiggling her arms with a grin, “but... I could give it a try.”

The two continue talking, with Spinel sounding more and more confident as the conversation goes on. The chat continues as the line for food moves up inch by inch, and your heart swells watching them talk. You’re so glad at least one of the Crystal Gems is making an effort. A few years ago you would have expected Pearl or Steven to be the first to approach the two of you in this sort of situation, but... Amethyst has matured amazingly in these past few years.  

Speaking of Pearl...

Your mind drifts to thoughts of your once closest friend, and your eyes search the party, unsure if you’re hoping to find her or not. Your stomach jolts as you spot her on the other side of the beach, chatting with... a Pink Pearl? You hadn’t seen her around before; she must be a new arrival. You’re about to turn back to Spinel and Amethyst, when Pearl’s eyes find yours, and your stomach jolts once more. Her eyes widen and her face flushes a light blue, and she quickly turns back towards the Pink Pearl, but glances at you every few seconds.

“Shit. I guess I gotta talk to her now. Can't avoid it forever...”

You sigh and step between Spinel and Amethyst, who are still happily chatting away.  

“Guys, I gotta... go do something alone real quick. Spins, hold my place in line please? And if you reach the food before I get back, uh... just grab me some chicken or something.”

You reach up to give her a quick peck on the cheek, and stalk off towards Pearl before nerves can get the better of you. You have no idea what you’re going to say or how she’ll react- she could barely look at you this morning when they all showed up to invite you to the party. You don’t know if she’s still mad, or just upset, or shy... whatever it is, this needs to stop. You don’t want to leave for school in a few weeks without fixing things between you two.

“...And another time, Greg tried to fuse with Rose- uh, Pink. It was quite the sight, at the time we didn’t think fusions between Gems and humans were possible. Steven proved us wrong with that too, as he has with so many other-”

You walk up to the Pearls, trying to be as non-invasive as possible.. You catch the tail end of some story Pearl is telling, which halts the second she spots you. Once again her face flushes, and she places a hand on her hip, clearly trying to show an air of confidence.

“Volleyball, why don’t you go find Steven and the others? I’ll...catch up with you later.”

Pink Pearl- Volleyball?- nods quickly and brushes past you, giving a small smile and a nod before she leaves.  

“Volleyball, huh? That’s an... interesting nickname, even for a Gem.”

“Oh, Steven thought of it a few days ago...” Pearl replies with a roll of the eyes, “not his best, but I’ll come up with something better eventually. Can’t exactly call her ‘Pink’.  

“Guess not,” you say awkwardly, halting the conversation. You stand there a moment, just fidgeting, willing the right words to enter your head.

“Y/n-”

“Pearl-”

You both start at the same time, interrupting the other simultaneously. You both giggle awkwardly, and you feel the tension ease, somewhat.

You sigh and start speaking first. “Pearl, listen, I... I can somewhat understand why you were shocked when I came back with Spinel the way I did. I know it seemed like I was defending all her past actions and just writing off all the wrong she did but I promise that’s not the case. I really struggled with it for a while on the island, and I’m not saying she’s perfect, but... she wants to learn, and grow, and change. Just like all the other Homeworld Gems who have showed up since Steven dismantled the empire. And she’s making the effort, she’s made giant steps these past few weeks. Can’t you just-”

Pearl cuts you off with a tight hug, almost startling you enough to make you cry out in surprise. But you keep it together enough to finish your thought.

“Can’t you just give us a chance?”

Pearl stays still for a moment, arms still wrapped tightly around you. A few years ago this would have had you blushing like mad, but now you’re just confused.  

“Oh, Y/n... I was never mad at you. And I haven’t been upset with Spinel for a while now, either. Not after watching how happy she makes you. I was just...”

She pulls back finally, hands still on your shoulders. You’re surprised to see tears forming in her eyes, which she wipes away quickly before you can comment.

“I was just so worried about you, that first day you came back with her,” Pearl continues, “I had no idea if she’d manipulated you into caring for her, or if she had hurt you somehow... and then I gravely misunderstood what you were trying to tell me. I made her- and you- so upset.”

She sighs and takes a step back, dropping her arms. “The reason I haven’t been... around... I was just too ashamed, I suppose. I was brash with my assumptions when you got back, and knowing how Spinel probably still feels about me, I thought it was best I keep my distance. But mostly I was just embarrassed.”

She stops speaking, though she seems like she wants to say more but can’t find the words. Her eyes are downcast to the sand, her gaze searching the grains for what to say next.  

“I guess I should just say... I’m sorry, Y/n. I never meant to hurt you or Spinel. And I’m sorry I got angry with you when you first got back.”

Your heart lifts at her (admittedly long overdue) apology. Finally- this was all you had wanted to hear. You had stopped being upset with her a while ago, but you had wanted her to make the first apology, so you’d waited for her to come to you. It seemed that just wasn’t her way- habits were hard to break after thousands of years of keeping them. But still.

“Pearl... it’s okay. Really. I can appreciate the fact that you were worried for me... and trust me, I know how it looked when my... kidnapper and I rode back into town holding hands. I can't fully explain It, but even before she took me it felt like we were connected, somehow. Even when she was rejuvenated. I just... can you trust me that being with her is my choice?”

Pearl nods, tears once again forming in her eyes. She’s always been an easy crier.  

“Of c-course, Y/n. I just want you both to be happy. Spinel... after what Rose did to her, she deserves that much.”

“You’re damn right.”

Both you and Pearl jump slightly as a voice sounds out of nowhere, and you turn to see Spinel approaching with a plate of food.

“Sorry doll, just didn’t want your food to get cold or anythin’,” Spinel continues, moving to stand next to you. "Besides, I... wanted to come chat with ya.” She looks to Pearl, whose gaze flickers between the two of you.

“O-oh, well, that’s fine! It’s nice to see you again, Spinel,” Pearl replies nervously.

“Well, ya don’t have to lie, but thanks all the same.” Spinel’s accent grows heavier, something you’ve noticed that happens when she becomes emotional in some form.

Pearl sigh and crosses her arms, slightly agitated by the provocation. “I’m not lying... I was just talking to Y/n about everything that’s happened. And how... I’m glad you two are together. Really.”

Spinel hands you the plate which you take quickly, catching the determined look in her eyes. She takes a few steps to stand face to face with Pearl, and you briefly wonder if she’s going to start something again-

But Spinel holds out her hand, mimicking something you’d taught her a few weeks back for meeting new humans.  

“Thank you, Pearl. And I just wanna say... I’m sorry for what I did, too. Kinda probably worse than you bein’ upset with me and Y/n, here, but... I appreciate you trying. I just want you to know I’m trying too. I know you and Y/n were close in the past, and I don’t wanna stand between that or anything. So... friends?”

Pearl stares hopefully up at Spinel for a moment before taking her hand gently in her own.

“Friends.”

After a few awkward smiles, the three of you head back over to rejoin everyone, something you’re very grateful for. You’re not sure if you could have handled more of... that. Plus, now you can catch up with Steven and the others you haven’t gotten a chance to talk to yet!

Spinel stays by your side the whole time while you eat and chat. She doesn’t say much to the group at large, but when Steven, Garnet and Pearl slip off to mingle some more, Spinel seems to loosen up a little. She jokes with Amethyst, Peridot and Lapis, and is visibly pleased when Bismuth finally shows up.

“Hey, Biz!” Peridot calls out to the approaching Gem. “Where have you been? You missed our wonderful display of farmed goods.”

“Yeah, it’s... pretty much all eaten now,” you add on, “but damn was it good. All of it.”

“Heh, sorry guys. I was just finishing up something in the forge,” Bismuth explains with a smirk, “A little... welcome to Earth present, if you will.”

You cock your eyebrow in confusion as she turns to Spinel, now fully grinning at the pink Gem.

“F-for me? Aw, Bismuth, you didn’t-”

“C’mon now, it’s nothing! I wanted to.”

“Well, okay... what is it?” Spinel asks, trying to mask the eagerness in her voice.

“I know you weren’t exactly built for fighting- like most of us Crystal Gems,” Bismuth says with a chuckle, “and I remember you telling us once that you don’t have a weapon of your own, which is why you nicked that rejuvenator in the first place. And I know it’s not like we have much fighting left to do, but...”

Bismuth pulls an object from her smock’s pocket and holds it out for Spinel to inspect. She takes it tentatively, curiously inspecting it for a moment before her eyes light up.

“Oh my stars. You didn’t.”

Bismuth places her hands on her hips and laughs heartily. “Hey, you seemed like a natural with the thing, from what I’ve heard. Don’t fix what’s not broken, right?”

You purse your lips together, still not totally sure what it could be, before Spinel takes a few paces back from everyone and pushes the button on the side of the object.

On the side of her scythe.

“Ohhhh,” you breathe out, fighting the urge to smack your forehead. You watch Spinel inspect her new weapon with wonder, and you do the same from afar. It’s definitely not a rejuvenator, luckily, but other than that small detail, it’s almost exactly the same, down to the gem at the top. Though this one is distinctly more... pink.

Spinel makes sure she’s out of range of anyone, and she gives it a few test spins. Her grin grows almost wicked, her eyes wild, and your heart leaps in your chest. Now that she’s not threatening anyone with it, it’s almost... attractive to see her like this. You briefly wonder how fun it would be to train with her, fake fighting, ending up in a sweaty pile at the end-

“So, you like it, right?” Lapis interrupts your thoughts with a bemused smile as Spinel sheathes the weapon.

“Are you kidding? I love it!” Spinel exclaims happily, phasing it into her gem. “Best present ever. Well... second best,” she finishes with a coy look towards you, causing you to avert your eyes and flush, flashing back to the thoughts you were having moments ago.

“Good. I thought you might,” Bismuth says proudly, “took me all week to forge that thing. Wanted to get it just right.”

“Really... thank you,” Spinel says sincerely, stepping up to the group and meeting Bismuth’s eyes. “You guys have made me feel... accepted, since I’ve been here. I didn’t think I would find that anywhere else except with Y/n. I’m glad to have been wrong.”

“Oh stars, stop with the speech and c’mere,” Bismuth teases good-naturedly, pulling her into a hug. Peridot and Lapis follow suit, encircling your girlfriend who looks amazingly contented, eyes closed. For the umpteenth time this night, your heart swells with joy. This is all you could have wanted for her.

As you gaze at her, Spinel opens her eyes and stretches her arms through the cluster of friends and pulls you swiftly to her. You giggle nervously, hoping Bismuth and the others don’t mind the addition of a human. But they all join in with your giggling, until Bismuth is wrapping her arms around the group and lifting everyone at once, causing the four of you caught in her embrace to squeal with laughter.

“Damn, looks like a love fest over here!”

The hug splits apart, and you wipe at the happy tears that had begun to form in your eyes. “Oh, hey Amethyst! Spinel got a gift from Bismuth and then the group hug got carried away,” you explain, still giggling slightly.

“Hey, that’s great! You’ll have to show me whatever it is later,” Amethyst says, turning to Spinel. “But for now you guys have to come back to the stage! Sadie Killer is about to go on!”

Spinel gasps and rushes to grab your hand, excitement plain on her face.

“We have to go dance!” she exclaims, and without waiting for a reply she begins to drag you back to the dance floor, a spring in her step.

“I’m so glad she’s happy here,” you think, “I can’t ask her to come with me to Empire City now... can I? Not after she’s making so many new friends...

You shake your head and follow her to the front of the stage, where Sadie is taking the mic to introduce the band.

“I’m so excited!” Spinel cries out from her place beside you. You smile and wrap your arms around her small frame, giving her a quick hug before the music starts. You want her to know you’re excited to just be here with her.

The two of you get pretty into dancing once again, and even wind up in a big dance circle with a bunch of Gems and humans, everyone taking turns in the middle to show off. You sit that part out, but Spinel grows bold and rushes in at the tail end of a song, stretching and moving to the beat. You clap happily along with everyone once the song and her dance ends, and as she walks back towards you, you hold out your arms for another hug.

“Proud of you,” you mumble as she steps into your embrace, resting her chin on the top of your head.  

“Thanks doll... I’m just havin’ so much fun. I love it here,” she replies, and your heart pangs. You really can’t ask her to leave this behind.  

The band starts to play a slow song, and Spinel pulls back to look into your eyes.  

“Dance with me?” she asks, already swaying the two of you to the beat.  

You chuckle and reply, “Obviously.”

You show her the traditional positions for slow dancing, and you listen to the song while gazing into her deep pink eyes. There’s nothing you don’t love about her face- tear marks and all. You move your hand from her shoulder to her cheek, stroking the black lines you’ve come to love so much. She shudders at your touch, eyes fluttering closed, and leans into your hand. A smile finds its way to her face as you stay like that for a while, dancing all but forgotten.  

As the song ends, she opens her eyes and gazes at you with what could only be described as pure love. Before you can say anything, she encircles her arms around your waist tightly, and pulls you in for the sweetest kiss you’ve ever known. Your eyes close with bliss and you forget where you are, all sounds around you are blocked out.  

There’s only her.  

x * x * x * x * x  

You dance a while longer before the band announces the end of the party, and Steven goes up on stage to make his usual end-of-summer speech. You only half listen, fretting nervously about the talk you know you need to have with Spinel about what the end of summer means for you. You grip her hand tightly as she listens to the speech, not that she seems to mind.  

Once the party is all wrapped up and everyone begins making their way back to Beach City or Little Homeworld, you and Spinel make the rounds to say goodbye. Bismuth and the others make you promise that you’ll take some time to come visit them with Spinel, so they can finally show you around properly. You agree readily, which makes everyone pleased, especially your girlfriend. You know she’s been wanting you to visit for a while, and you really do want to go, even if it means taking time off work.

After you’ve said your goodbyes and goodnights, Spinel turns to you, her face slightly weary but still smiling.

“Well, should we head home too?”  

“Mm... do you want to watch the waves for a bit?” you ask, hoping your nerves don’t find their way into your voice.  

“Sure, doll. You know I love sittin’ out here with ya.”

You walk closer to the water and she plops down, pulling you with her gracefully. You get situated in your usual position, and stay silent for a few minutes as you gaze out into the dark waters.

Finally, though, you know you need to bring it up.

“Spinel... I need to ask you something. And tell you something.”

“W-what? Okay... what is it?” she asks nervously, arms tightening around you.  

You stay facing out towards the ocean as you reply, “I don’t... know if you remember, but... ah, there isn’t an easy way to say this. I have to go back to Empire City soon to finish my last year of college.”

“Oh. Yeah, I remember you mentioned you live there most of the year... why?”

“Um. Well, I guess I just.” You swallow, your throat running dry, “I just don’t know if- I mean, you’ve been making such good friends here with everyone and I don’t want to tear you away from all this when you’ve just gotten used to it, but I guess I’m a little selfish and-”

“Woah woah woah, babydoll. Calm down, take a breath, yeah?” she interjects, unwrapping you from her embrace. You turn in the sand to face her, crossing your legs underneath you as you sit pitifully in front of her.

She speaks before you can continue rambling. “Is this about me comin’ with you or not?”

You nod, still too scared to speak, worried your voice will give away your fears if you do.

“Oh, Y/n... don’t you know by now? There’s never a question when it comes to me an’ you.”

She puts a finger to your chin, lifting your head gently to make you meet her gaze.  

“I love you so much, doll. Yeah, I might be makin’ a few friends here, and I really like ‘em a lot. But the whole reason I’m able to do these things is because of you. Because of the strength you give me to go on tryin’ every day.”

You take a shaky breath and steel your nerves. “R-really? You’re not... mad that I’m making you choose?”

Spinel smiles gently down at you, moving her hand to cup your face. “Course not. I’ve already chosen a thousand times over. It’s always you.”

You can’t hold back the tears that spring to your eyes at her words, and you lean forward to bury your face in the crook of her neck, silently shaking. You never expected this. God, you never even hoped for this. But this Gem just keeps surprising you.  

“T-thank you,” you whisper, and she sighs happily, tightening her hold on you once more.

“Never thank me for lovin’ ya, Y/n. Never.”

You sit in silence once more, this time simply holding each other instead of watching the waves. Spinel is the first one to break the silence this time, petting the back of your head before standing the both of you up.

“Come on, Y/n. Let’s get you home to bed.”

You walk hand in hand with her back towards your apartment in Beach City, heart full to bursting. You can’t wait to see what the future will bring you and Spinel.  

You’ll be ready for it. Together.

[neo-shitty]

extra elongated tag game!

tagged by: @waithyuck​ hi, thank you for tagging me. i hope you’re safe :))

tagging: @94core​, @legendnct​, @juliennestudies​ (hi, it’s althea. you might want to do this?), @jaesmintea​ (can we be friends dkjsf idk how to make friends here) and whoever wants to play this game. it’s pretty lengthy tho.

O N E

tell me the first song that made you stan your current fave group and why did your faves attract you so much?

for seventeen, it was clap. the synchronization, even when they made a mistake, was really impressive to me. i started binge-watching their dance videos and i just remember being at awe at how a lot of people (considering they’re 13) could be in sync like that.

for nct, it was kick it. i used to say i didn’t like the song, but it won’t get out of my head. i’m not sure what keeps me attracted to them as a group. i just am. also, haechan is the love of my life. i’ve never loved an idol the way i loved him.

for ateez, it was wonderland. good lord, i just love that song. the mv, the vibe it gives off, the aesthetics during that era. makes me want to start a revolution.

T W O

rule: answer the ten questions given by the previous person and write 10 of your own for the next person!

1. what is your favorite memory from your childhood?

i didn’t have a dull childhood or something. i just don’t have specific memory that i could consider my favorite. but if there was anything i was fond of, as a kid, it was being innocent and not worrying too much about anything. i miss that and i wish i could go back. 

2. if you could travel anywhere in the world with just a snap of your fingers, where would you go and why?

the museum where van gogh’s starry night is stored. i want to visit it in the middle of the night when there’s no one else there. i just want to stare at it and appreciate it.

3. describe your personality in three (3) words.

unbowed. unbent. unbroken. haha, kidding. impulsive, unpredictable, and...confusing i guess?

4. what is your favorite thing that you have ever read? (anything you’ve ever read counts! fanfiction, poems, novels etc.) why?

i don’t really have a favorite :(

5. are you the studying type of person or the type to just ‘wing it’ when you have a big test coming up?

i’m not really the type who studies regularly but i don’t walk into the exam room without reading at all. i read and study a few days before the exam, try to get as much information as possible.

6. between bold colors and pastel colors, which do you prefer?

i’d rather go with pastels in the day and bold neons at night. 

7. do you live life in the moment or do you plan every action you take?

a bit of both depending on the situation. i’m the type who plans ahead on things that i really want to happen but i have my fair share of spontaneous, impulsive decisions that lead up to really fun experiences. but when it comes to life in general? i’m just taking in every day as it comes. 

8. what is your favorite holiday and why? (all holidays count! across all religions and cultures 😄)

christmas. the weather is cool and everyone’s a bit kind during that time of the year. and it leads up to new year.

9. would you rather stay up to stargaze in the middle of the night or wake up early to watch the sunrise?

i can’t see stars even with glasses on because my eyes suck. so i guess, i’d rather watch the sunrise because that obnoxious ball of bright yellow light is so hard to miss. plus i like how the surroundings change colors as the night changes into day.

10. what is your favorite eye color on another person?

blue on a brunette? i know it’s rare but it’s such a beautiful mix.

my ten questions for you:

what’s your favorite season and why?

are you a cat person or a dog person?

what’s your current favorite song and why can’t you stop listening to it?

if you had the ability to do either of the following, would you rather change something in the past or see into the future?

what’s your favorite movie?

what did miss rona ruin for you this 2020?

what’s your favorite album? (you can name one for each genre you like or you can just name one, it’s up to you.)

if you could talk to your past self (person who lived your past life), what would you tell them?

do you have a go-to person? who is it?

if you could tell your younger self something, what would you say?

T H R E E

rule: bold the statements that apply to you, italicize your aspirations.

AIR ༉⋆͙̈

i have small hands / i love the night sky / i watch animals and birds when i pass them by / i drink herbal tea / i wake to see the dawn / the smell of dust is comforting / i’m valued for being wise / i prefer books to music / i meditate / i find joy in learning new truths from the world around me

FIRE ༉⋆

i don’t have straight hair / i like to wear ripped jeans and overalls / i play an organized sport / i love dogs / i am not afraid of adventure / i love to talk to strangers / i always try new foods / i enjoy road trips / summer is my favorite season / my radio is always playing

WATER ༉⋆͙̈

i wear bracelets on my wrists / i love the bustle of the city / i have more than one set of piercings / i read poetry / i love the sound of a thunderstorm / i want to travel the world / i sleep past midday most days / i love simply lit dinners and fluorescent signs / i rewatch kids shows out of nostalgia / i see emotions in colors not words

EARTH ༉⋆͙̈

i wear glasses or contacts / i enjoy doing the laundry / i am a vegetarian or vegan / i have an excellent sense of time / my humor is very cheerful / i am a valued advisor to my friends / i believe in true love / i love this chill of mountain air / i’m always listening to music / i am highly trusted by the people in my life

AETHER ༉⋆͙̈

i go without makeup in my daily life / i make my own artwork / i keep on track of my tasks and time / i always know true north / i see beauty in everything / i can always smell flowers / i smile at everyone i pass by / i always fear history repeating itself / i have recovered from a mental disorder / i can love unconditionally

F O U R

the ultimate tag: answer whichever ones you want to because there are a lot.

PERSONAL

name: althea

nickname: thea

birthday: april 27

zodiac: taurus

nationality: filipino

languages: filipino, english, learning korean

gender: female

sexuality: straight

height: 5’2”

BLOG STUFF

inspiration for muse: music

meaning behind my url: supposedly neocity but that was taken so :D 

blog established: 2016/2015? but i only became active this 2020

followers: 35 :D hi <3

FAVORITES

favorite animal/s: cats :(

favorite book/s: warcross by marie lu

favorite color/s: black and skin-tone shades

favorite fictional characters: i don’t really have favorites, sorry

favorite flower: sunflowers 

favorite scent: vanilla

favorite season: summer and fall or the tropical equivalents of these anw

RANDOM

average hours of sleep: 7-8

cats or dogs: cats

coffee, tea or hot chocolate: iced tea / hot chocolate

current time: 12:50 pm

dream trip: europe trip

dream job: i actually want to be a 5-star michelin

hobbies: writing, listening to music

hogwarts house: slythering

last movie watched: the darkest minds

last song listened to: sweet creature - harry styles

no. of blankets you sleep with: 1

random fact(s): i’m in both college and high school atm (august 5, 2020) because i haven’t graduated yet and my college a.y already started

F I V E

10 songs i can’t stop listening to:

just go - ikon

easy - stray kids

breathe - james arthur

lotto - exo

god’s menu - stray kids

inception - ateez

killing me - ikon

la la lost you - niki

dontmakemefallinlove - cuco

safe inside - james arthur

[this-lioness]

Quaranmemes for Quarantines

Tagged by @reallyginnyf​ <3  Putting this under a cut since it’s pretty much doubling as my weekend wrap-up as well.

when was the last time you left your home? On Thursday I had to run a few quick no-contact errands -- dropped a bulk mailing off on the rear platform at the post office, deposited a Fedex envelope into one of their pickup boxes, and then ran some miscellaneous groceries over to my Mom’s house.  Today I went for a run, but only around the neighborhood, so that doesn’t feel like it counts. 

what was the last thing you bought? I’ve actually been doing a bit of online shopping lately -- bought a sewing machine (still need to sit down and set it up), a gas-powered pressure washer (arrived today), a new bathroom scale and a vacuum sealer.  Last thing we bought in-store were some small necessities from Walmart.

is quarantine driving you insane or are you finally relaxed? This is tough to answer, because I’m never actually relaxed.

I worry about someone in my immediate family getting sick, but beyond that the quarantine doesn’t really trouble me.  I’m largely a homebody, and honestly this has kept us from a lot of unnecessary spending, so all the places I’d probably be going would just be buying shit that we really don’t need. I think my anxiety only ramps up when we have to go somewhere, like when my parents need groceries, and we have to go through the whole process of masks and gloves and fully decontaminating everything once we get home.  We have it down to a science, but it’s still a whole process.

But I’m frankly enjoying the time at home.  I’m a very “routine” person -- I’m comforted by having lists of things I need to do, and places to put things, and then doing it all by rote.  We worked very hard to make our house be a place where we enjoy being, creating, relaxing and working, and now we’re reaping the benefit of all those things.

who are you spending quarantine with? My husband Marc and all the cats.  I only see my parents long enough to drop things off at their house.

do you have pets to keep you company? We have three of our own -- Bones, Spencer and Rosie -- plus two fosters, Baby and Blue.  There is also a semi-feral cat, Fidget, that we feed and care for, and he occasionally spends a night inside if it’s particularly cold or wet out.

what are your current responsibilities? We’re both very fortunate in that we are fully capable of working from home, and both our employers are in full gear.  Mine is actually busy enough to need to hire new people for the sudden influx of work, apparently. So I work my “day job” during the day, and when I’m not working I’m cleaning and doing laundry, trying to keep our chest freezer topped up with ready-to-prepare meals, a lot of organizing and a bit of gardening.  I really need to sit down and do something creative, although my muse has been completely dead for... longer than I’d care to admit.  I’m going to give it a bit of a try tonight, though, so we’ll see.

Just lately I’ve been on a purging spree.  Thursday, Friday and yesterday I cleaned out every corner of the art room / office and made three piles of craft supplies to give away.  I also gathered together two enormous bags of various clothes and gave that away as well.  My next step is probably to switch out my winter wardrobe for the summer stuff, although we’re expecting a good week of cold, rainy weather so... maybe not quite yet.

do you have a room to yourself? Well, if I ever needed time to myself I could certainly find it.  The art room / office is unoccupied when we’re not working, and when we are I can always come down to the living room or go into the bedroom with my laptop, or I’ve got a little “writing chair” in the dining room, by the back patio, that’s nice to sit in.  I can be content anywhere in the house, basically.

are you exercising? I wasn’t, but a few days ago I decided to change that.  I need to get better control over my physical well-being (and self-image), so I made myself a little weight / diet log, included columns for water intake and exercise, and signed up for a “virtual 5k”.  Today it was just warm enough to get outside, so I went for a run.  Technically we went for a run, but Marc got winded not too far into it and had to head home again.  I grabbed my earbuds and went back out.

Got in 2.27 miles before deciding to head back home.  Because the weather is going to be shitty I plan to kick the fosters out of their room for at least 45 minutes every day so that I can get some treadmill time in.  With any luck we’ll shortly have space cleared in the attic so that we can do yoga and maybe barre as well.  

town, country, city? We’re in a semi-rural suburb in Bucks County, PA.  It’s... suburban, but very very blue collar, and there’s plenty of farms around, large and small.

how’s your toilet paper supply? We seem to be OK.  I am a prepper by nature, and I made sure to stock up before things started to get bad.  I’m also being very mindful of how much I use, which helps.  I’m more worried about my folks, who blow through resources like crazy, but I don’t think it’s terribly hard to come by as long as you can get to a store.

what’s the worst thing that you had to cancel? I was a bit bummed about the Colin Firth concert being cancelled in the early part of this month.  That was going to be a nice night out.

To be very honest, my biggest regret is that we took on the fosters when we did.  No one in this area is in a position to adopt two cats, and to be honest... they’re not very good fosters.  Blue is friendly and outgoing, she likes to play, but she’s not cuddly -- she’s not really interested in being petted or held and doesn’t seem to want to sit in your lap for very long.

Baby likes Marc well enough, but she continues to run from me whenever she sees me, and forget about coming up for a cuddle.  She’s just... fucking miserable.

We’re also giving up on trying to integrate them with our cats.  They don’t have very good “cat manners” (they have no sense of personal space and will get right up in the other cats’ business), and the two of them have twice now gone after Rosie in what was a semi-playful, semi-aggressive manner that she definitely did not appreciate, so that’s the end of that.

It would be different if they got along with our cats, or if they were cuddly, but Blue is the only one that I’d consider truly adoptable.  Baby is fucking miserable and I have no idea how the fuck we’re going to adopt them out.  I’m desperately trying to find someone that can take them, but I don’t have a good feeling, and I honestly don’t know what we’re going to do long term.  It was a mistake taking them in, and I regret it, but I’ve got to find a way to deal with it now.

what’s the best thing you’ve had to cancel? This is going to sound terrible but... we were planning on going to a “Return of the Living Dead” convention in June.  Had tickets, a hotel, everything.  Technically it’s still on -- they haven’t cancelled the event yet -- but we’ve agreed we won’t be going, even if it’s still on in June.  Too much of a risk.

In theory this was going to be super fun, and I actually was excited about it, but... honestly, going to so many comic cons has really burned me out on other people who attend conventions, and the idea of being around mobs of people acting like smelly, poorly socialized assholes about something that I genuinely love was kind of stressing me out.

I didn’t want to see something that I love gatekept, I didn’t want to be “fake geek girled” about it by somebody with B.O. and no social awareness.  It was starting to stress me out. So I’m sad that we won’t be going, but glad that I don’t have to stress out about it.

who do you miss the most? My boss, I guess?  He was fun to hang out with and bullshit with, and we can’t really do that the same way that we did when we were in the office together.  I’m pretty lukewarm on everybody else I used to see in person day to day.

do you have any new hobbies? Ugh, please, I already have so many fucking hobbies.   Uh. Well, I did buy the sewing machine, so... :/  Let me get it set up and actually sew something before I start calling it a hobby, though.

what are you watching the most? Marc and I have been binge-watching Ozark and a show called Futureman, which are both compelling and extremely difficult to watch in different ways.  I’m still waiting on new content from the lady that lives in Japan, haha... this is probably a good opportunity to go back and watch whatever videos I haven’t seen yet.

are you still going to work? Remotely, yes, every day.  I’m actually using the time to try and get myself better organized and establish good work habits and routines that I can carry through to when things start to normalize.

what are you out of? Mmm... nothing, I don’t think?  I’m getting low-ish on yeast, since I’ve been baking so much, but I’m not even really low on that yet.  I’ve tried to do a “dried cranberry yeast starter” but I’m not convinced it took... I need to drain off the yeast liquid and add some flour tonight, see if it grows or if it’s a dud.  

have you made any changes to your hair during quarantine? I trimmed my bangs about a week ago, I think, because they were getting frustratingly long.  Fortunately I didn’t butcher them too badly.  Today I helped Marc give himself a trim, and he’s looking quite dapper again, so I guess we’re not in too bad of a shape.  I chopped my hair to the shoulders back before the quarantine so it would have to get much, much longer before it became problematic for me, and even then.  I’m still debating if I even want to color my grays at all, so I’m not concerned about “touching up roots” or anything like that.  I am what I am. 

Not tagging anyone because A) I’m terrible at tagging, B) Most of the people I follow that are “real people” and not just content-posting accounts are mutuals of one another.  If you want to participate, please consider yourself tagged.

[tracyk13]

36 and what a world I have seen

Honestly I’ve been terrible at journalling lately. Love handwriting in quill and ink style, but my current life leaves me exhausted after work and most of my time spent in education. But currently the Covid-19 pandemic made me consider the important world events I have witnessed. 

Born in 1984 I lived in a world of rapidly changing technology but still being forced outside to play. We always had an Apple computer in our house for as long as I can remember. Played the Oregon Trail in black and white, then in color. That was the standard computer game of my childhood. Mom got us Mario Teaches Typing, probably the only “video game” I ever played at that point. AOL was a thing. All those CDs in the mail with updates. I never really got into it, but my twin sister did.

Also a child of the Disney Golden Age of animation. Dramatically influenced my life to the point I went to work for Walt Disney World after college. Still a Disney fanatic to this day. 

Apparently my family visited Yellowstone National park (age 4? too young to remember anyway) then not too long after the park had the fire. 

Was alive though not conscious of world events when the Berlin Wall fell. Watch the birth of CNN during the first Desert Storm when my dad was there overseeing some of the first drone flights. The military required a pilot on hand for those flights. He told us later how some Iraqis would surrender to the drone plane, not that it was ever one of the ones he supervised. And according to my mom I frequently asked to NOT watch the 24 hour stream of news because it was too depressing and I knew that’s where dad was. 

Really started to pay attention to news (not that l enjoyed it but that’s the timeline for how chidden develop) during the O.J. Simpson trial. 

By that point I had lived on both coasts of the USA, crossed country twice, lived in many different environments from Washington’s cold wet seasons to California’s deserts California’s coast to landlocked suburbia of Georgia. 

Where I learned to drive, had a single Nokia phone for me and my twin in our tiny Cabrio convertible (I hate convertibles). Got a personal computer for the first time, where before it was a single family computer. The iMacs were coming out right when we were heading to college. My sister got the desktop, I got the laptop and have never looked back. Still have my gumstick shuffle iPod floating around and it still works.

Got to watch the insanity of Indecision 2000 and appreciate political humor for the first time.

I’ve been to 9 different schools for 12 years of school, not including college. That would make it ten. Was a freshman in high school when the Columbine shootings happened. Some weeks later we had a pipe bomb threat at our school which forced all the students out to the football field. From the top of the bleachers we could see the bomb squad and their dogs entering the school. All I could think of was if someone really wanted to kill at lot of people, there on the bleachers would be the place to do it. Then at some point in my adult life someone did it at a movie theater showing The Dark Knight. 

Saw the images of the Oklahoma City bombing. Heard about the Unabomber. Watched the Waco Texas incident.

But my senior year was the time of 9/11. My math class was out in the hallway doing a math related science type experiment, can’t tell you what it was. But that day was the only day I have ever heard a school of nearly 5,000 students absolutely silent during class change. Thus Desert Storm part two happened. 

Right before I headed off to college. So I wasn’t super savvy about applying to colleges. I only applied to one. Didn’t have a clue as to what I wanted to do with my life. I’ve done a wide variety of sports, been writing fiction since at least 10 years old, drew and painted fairly well, thought about doing animation or architecture (did a semester learning thing with a local firm, decided it wasn’t for me). 

Ended up getting a degree in two foreign languages but not fluent in either. It did greatly improve my understanding of the English language. And I had the privilege of an exchange program for a school year to Japan, plus of study abroad summer to Germany. Would never regret any of that. Even if it didn’t get me a degree that got me a job. 

Instead I went to Disney World as part of their internship program. Been in foods and hospitality for a significant portion of my life (thus far). Loved working there. Got to work with the Characters and it was fabulous. Even with the frustrations of all work environments. 

But it couldn’t last. Minimum wage was raised, but the cost of living out stripped the earnings for a single person living alone. Prompting a move back home with parents to get another degree. Then the Housing bubble burst, loans defaulted, mortgage crisis, resulting in the Great Recession. It did get me a house in my name but basically an income property for my mom as her inheritance from my grandmother. All the while I’m going to school to be a nurse.

Now let’s not forget about the many weather crises I’ve witnessed via the news. Hurricanes Katrina, Sandy, Harvey, Maria to name the ones I easily remember. The Class 5 tornado that wiped out a midwestern town. The volcano in Iceland rerouting planes. The tsunami in Indonesia and Sumatra. The massive earthquake in Haiti. These are only the ones that easily come to mind without researching what happened during the years I’ve been alive.

Not to mention the diseases that I’ve seen via the news. First to mind was the Ebola outbreak while I was in nursing school. Saw the hype on the Swine Flue, SARS, Avian flu to name a few easily remembered. Those never reached me personally. Now it’s Covid-19 unfolding. Called SARS-CoV-19 now, but that later.

But its not all disasters. Went to the Atlanta Centennial Olympics still have the t-shirt. Was alive during the first black president. 

Took part in the massive phenomena that was Harry Potter and still love it to this day. It showed me that fiction/fantasy could be a mainstream genre to write for. I started writing FanFiction at that time to fill in the long spaces between books. Started when fan fiction.net had the 7or 8 main characters to choose from for tagging. It was like the Wild West of figuring out what you were about to read. Learned about Slash, yaoi, lemons and such the hard way. But being exposed to it that way did open my eyes to what goes on in other people’s heads. Knew immediately that just because I didn’t like something didn't mean I had to hate on it. I left it alone once found and kept going. Really helped increase my tolerance to other cultures and thoughts.

Met my best friend on a role playing site and we wrote nonstop during our college years. Went to her wedding, have a lovely Renaissance style dress as a bridesmaid gift. Still am in touch with her. We don’t write together any more as we have moved in our lives with adulting. But I still have all those stories and hope to turn them into something.

Had my first camera cell phone in Japan as just a basic free phone. Was shocked to find cameras in the States were not standard. One of my friends in Japan kept doing selfies before they were called selfies. Blind positioning of the camera for pictures. Then came the iPhone and the world never looked back.

Joined Facebook when it required a college email. Used MSN messenger and Yahoo messenger to communicate with people around the world. Didn’t join the Twitter or Tumblr movement until after they became established. Saw the boom and bust of the Dot.Com bubble. Watched the Dow Jones numbers increase without the income to invest the way they said to.

Lived right above the poverty line during the Recession. Not knowing if I could make it the next month. Never being able to claim poverty on the tax forms. Caught in the income dead space of not being able to afford health insurance from the markets but in a state that didn’t allow for Medicaid expansion.

But I do not have the worry now thankfully. 

Jobs wise I’ve been a telemarketer, dishwasher, a line cook, a hostess, server, janitor, assistant manager, and now I’m a nurse. I started on med/surg, ED, Cardiac, and ICU. In a small rural hospital getting smaller in a time when rural were shutting down because of no funding. They serve areas with a high rates of unemployment, uninsured, drug and alcohol abuse.

Worked at a busier hospital were no bed was left empty. Sicker patients. Work in a mid-size place. Some days super busy, some slower. 

Covid-19 had the affect of somehow doing both. First few days was almost empty, now it fluctuates. Mostly rule outs. And the protocols are changing hourly which makes life frustrating for us. It’s the constant unspoken threat of going into work not knowing if you’ll have the right equipment to do the job. I’m not scared of the virus itself, not even of the collapse of the economy. I’m scared of the surge that will put my coworkers at risk.

I live alone (my little sister lives with me now) so very little contact with others. But they have kids and a much closer physical distance to their older parents. I know I will add days to my weeks if they have to stay out for any length of time. 

So this is the first time a world event as truly affected me. It is a terrifying time which prompted this summary of my life so far.

I went into a restaurant and saw no one. I never thought I’d see that day. I don’t want people to loose their income, but if people were to go about their daily activities we would loose so many in one go. All I can do is my job.

The more I watch the more depressed and stressed. At work is worse.

I’m teaching myself a new craft because of this. I have taken up leather working to make masks. It helps the creativity outlet. I started drawing class early in 2020 and was set to continue drawing and add painting when the social distancing started. I admit it felt overblown in the beginning. Now the numbers are changing rapidly and we are really seeing what happens in close communities. Just keep working. It’s part of life now. No matter how much if feels like a movie plot line.

But back to other things I’ve seen.

LGTBQA and others coming into the forefront of society. Saw legalization of gay marriage. Quite thrilled with that.

Didn’t hear the term Asexual in reference to a sexual preference until my early 20s. Immediately recognized similar stories to me. Never had an interest in sex or having a partner. A name did make things more relatable, but I will never fully understand people who seem to base their entire existence on their sexual preference.

I’ve been call sir many times based on how I dress. I still sound like a female. Can’t fault anyone for using the appropriate pronoun for what they see in front of them. But that’s a culture that’s growing. Preferred pronouns. But I have to admit that an online friend referred to me as “they” despite a lady being in my username and it felt nice. So in honor of the Special Snowflake term that floated around, I’m an nonbinary aromantic asexual. Probably with a fem-romanitic leaning. 

Saw the rise of the Millennials. I’m caught between Gen X and the Millennials. Now that all the Millennials are of age to vote, perhaps change is underway?

I’m back in college for my 3rd and then 4th degree. In nursing. Online. Watching the world combat a virus.

A US that is split down the middle politically. A world with more pollution problems than we can handle. Governments preferring to coverup mistakes and corruption than help their citizens. The term Public Servant is obviously not taken seriously in some places. See Flint, MI and their water. Lobbyists creating bills that benefit corporations rather than people. Politicians that never retire and keep getting lucrative reelection donations from those very corporations. 

The rise of narcotic drug use, prescription drugs. Pill mills. 

Sex scandals taking center stage in the news rather than things that actually affect daily life. Among things I will never understand is the fear of Transgender women in the women’s restrooms when it was always a straight conservative man who was the center of all these sex scandals. 

Asexual brain at work. I simply do not understand. Conclusion: If you look like a certain gender, you’ll most often be treated as that gender.

What I do miss were the kid shows and cartoons in the 90s. They were super progressive with great literature themes. I knew the story of some of the greatest classic literature simply by the references in those shows. 

Also the era of War on Drug commercials. Recycling promoted. 

My favorite: Captain Planet. Not only was it pushing for a cleaner earth it had different nationalities. Stereotypical, but a far better representation than what I am seeing in kids shows today. It was diverse in that multiple skin tones were seen on screen together rather than specific skin tones marketed to that specific demographic. Now I do like how many more cultures are represented, I just want them shown in ways where color and culture is not the primary focus. 

It also surged a desire to protect the planet. The knowledge that we need clean water and air. Educational shows like Magic School Bus and Bill Nye explained what is happening in the environment long before Global Warming became political. With the global shut in we see the world cleansing itself. 

Now the marijuana legalization issue. No one has died from overdosing on weed. Unlike Alcohol. Yes smoke isn’t good for your health like cigarettes, but the complications are not as prevalent, well studied, or as life threatening with what is known. The disconnect of state legalization and national illegalities is mind blowing. I hope to see that break so we can study it.

Overall I know I have seen a lot of historical events and I hope to live another 36 plus years to see more. 3 decades, the change of a century and the change of the millennia. Y2K hysteria included. 

The world is changing. The outcome is unknown. Peace be upon us all.

[takemedancingmaine]

Go, Cubs, Go!

It was cold. Very, very cold. I had prepared myself for it, too, but wasn't able to properly stay warm no matter how hard I tried. The walk from my front door to the stadium takes less than ten minutes, and in that time I'd frozen.

I had worn a thermal and a long sleeve t-shirt underneath my jersey and my jacket, had a knit hat on and had on a pair of leggings underneath my jeans. When I'd left my apartment I'd glanced at my weather app on my phone and thought about how ridiculous I'd look all bundled up when the temperature was supposed to be 45 degrees I almost cringed in embarrassment. I was pretty good at dealing with the cold.

When I was a block away from my place though and a massive wind gust came and almost picked me up off the ground, I was thanking my forethought for the layers. We were going to be in the stands, high up and in the path of the wind, and I would have been miserable if I'd not dressed like I had. I thought wistfully of the overpriced beer that I'd purchase once inside and although the drink would be cold the alcohol would warm me up.

The streets and sidewalks were packed. Usually, they're pretty busy, especially when the Cubs play. This though. This was something else.

This was game one of the World Series.

The air was electric as I followed the crowds, the hoards of people--who had come by foot, car, train, and some by planes--down the road to the main entrance. I passed by countless scalpers yelling that they had the best price, passed people who'd bought water in bulk just to sell it to fans on the street, passed people who were overflowing out of bars with stamps on their hands to prove that they were allowed back inside per the fire code, and had even seen who I thought was Bill Murray out of the corner of my eye.

I was beyond excited. Words didn't exist that could describe how excited I was. Everyone from the group was coming out tonight, even Niall had been convinced to show up, and it was baseball at its finest.

There are two types of baseball. The first type is baseball in the spring and summer. Baseball in the summer is when you can just sit out in shorts and a jersey, get a tan while drinking a cold beer and watching a sport that enables you to have a conversation. It's a hot and lazy day with friends, sports, and alcohol. You can talk, watch, and just enjoy life as you engage with those around you.

Then there's tournament baseball. It includes lots of heckling and tension that doesn't leave your shoulders for hours. Any drinking is done to help relieve tension and not just to be done socially. The highs of the game--strikeouts, double plays, home runs--are higher and the lows are lower. There's always a belief that the impossible can happen and that's what sports are all about: the impossible becoming reality.

Both types of baseball have their merits, but both types also have their pitfalls. For instance, a negative to summer baseball is the inevitability that at least once you will forget sunscreen. Then that perfect tan you worked on turns into a radioactive, angry red colour--here's looking at you, college Cleo. A negative to tournament baseball is that it can end quickly and sour even the best of moods.

I shoved both my hands into my back pockets and tried to get to the meeting point we’d set for ourselves near the marquee. It was difficult to squeeze past and manoeuvre through countless people of all ages, but I spotted Harry and Ana along with Cleo all bundled together, chatting to each other with their backs angled toward the wind to block some of the cold.

I wasn't at all concerned that seeing my friends in person after news came out about Niall and myself. The group chat had been absolutely mental throughout the week, but it was nothing too bad, nothing neither Niall nor I couldn't handle. I was hoping that my friends would be mature and would have gotten all of their teasing out via text. I knew that wouldn't be the case, but I hoped regardless of my knowledge.

“Are we crazy for doing this?” Ana asked with a genuinely curious look on her face as I stepped up to them.

“Was Kennedy crazy when he said we were going to the moon?” Cleo asked back.

“Yes.” Harry nodded, his beanie causing the ends of his curls to wrap up and frame his face. He looked ten years younger as a result.

“Then yes.” Cleo smiled as she nudged me.

“Oh look, it's the woman of the hour.” Harry turned to face me. “I don't think I've ever known you not single.”

I groaned and closed my eyes for a moment.

“It's true,” he said matter-of-factly. “Three years now and you've not had a boyfriend for any span of time.”

“I wasn’t exactly withering away into nothingness during that time,” I sighed. “I went out and had fun.”

“Having fun with someone and dating someone are two completely different things,” Ana said.

“Cleo’s never had a girlfriend,” I pointed out.

“That's not true.” Cleo nudged me again. “Remember Mary?”

I shivered. I did remember her. “She was miserable and it only lasted three months.”

“It still counts.” She shrugged.

“It does.” Harry nodded as he gave me a cheeky smile. “Is it the accent that does it for you? Turns you on? Are you using him to get a work visa in Ireland?”

“Dude, sometimes I have an accent.” I gave him a pointed look. When I spoke to my parents or spoke in Hindi the accent just came out. I'd learned to speak it from my parents who had their own accents, so my words were tinted in the same ways.

Harry shrugged.

“And no. Seeing as he just moved back here and took a pretty good job, I doubt he's moving back to Ireland any time soon. If I was using him for a work visa it would be a poor plan.”

“True,” he said.

Even over the din of shouting and heckling and excited conversations going on around us, we all heard Louis calling out to is all in greeting. He was flanked by Niall and Liam, the three of them having met up at Niall’s and walking here instead of attempting to take the train. He had texted me while they walked saying they'd given him his fair share of ribbing.

He walked up to me wearing a Cubs hat and I spotted a Cubs shirt underneath his windbreaker. I had a sneaking suspicion that neither item was his.

He wrapped an arm around my waist and kissed my cheek as he stepped beside me. I melted under his touch--even knowing that all of our friends were gaping at us--and leaned into his side.

“I cannot believe you got me to come out here,” he said to us all while looking around pointedly at the crowd. “This place is absolutely insane.”

“It's pretty cool though, right?” Ana asked.

“Yeah, it's alright.” He shrugged, but his smirk gave him away.

“Ignore him, he's excited,” Louis looked between him and me, “and not just because Ruby is here.”

I reached over and flicked Louis’ ear. He laughed, and so did the rest of them. I groaned and Niall's hand squeezed my waist.

“Are these yours?” I asked as I reached up flicked the brim of Niall’s hat and pulled the collar of his shirt a bit.

“Actually, yes.” He smiled, proud of himself. “They're from when I lived here the first time. I worked literally less than a block from here: I couldn't not have some gear. Plus, I look really good in blue.”

I laughed and shook my head at him. He wasn't wrong, though. He did look good in blue, it brought out his eyes. Plus the baseball cap was doing things for me.

“Ready to go in?” Liam asked. He was getting anxious. Liam and I were on the same page about this game as anxious and excited energy seemingly flowed out of the two of us in waves.

“Let's forking do this thing!” Cleo jumped up and yelled. She was less anxious and more excited. Cleo was optimistic. I admired it, Liam ignored it as his pessimism swept through him.

The seven of us started moving through the throngs of people toward a gate where we all put our keys and phones in bins as we went through the x-ray machines and got our tickets scanned.

Liam was absolutely tense as he led us toward our seats, his excitement manifested in his tight shoulders and the crinkle in his brow, in his clenched jaw. Niall gave me a curious look and then looked at Liam before looking back at me. I laughed and gave an amused look back to him.

We had no trouble finding our seats--the number of times Liam and I had each been here was a fair number--and once we’d established our spot, Harry and Louis set off to get us each a beer.

Cleo was directly behind me, next to Ana. Harry would sit back there with them while Niall was on one side of me, Liam on the other, and Louis was to be on the far side of Niall. It was strategic on everyone's part to place Liam and me beside each other. He and I varied our emotions on the events of the game much more so than anyone else. Liam because he’d been a Cubs fan since before he could talk and me because when I followed a team I gave them every ounce of passion I possessed. Liam and I just understood each other best when it came to events like this.

Niall nudged his knee against mine as we were listening to Cleo tell a story about a second grader and a bug at recess. He gave me a look and I understood that he was asking if I was okay. Clearly, he could sense the tension as it rolled off of me. Or maybe he was sensing Liam’s tension through me.

I gave Niall a small nod and placed my hand on top of his knee, making a horrified expression when Cleo said something of the young girl trying to get the bug to go into her ear. Niall laughed at that, as did Ana. Liam and I both made faces but didn't offer anything vocally. I wasn't sure either of us had the capacity to at the time.

It took a while, but eventually, Harry and Louis made it back to us with trays of cups that overflowed with beer. I brightened considerably at the beverage passed my way, as did Liam. We all toasted and cheersed before I lifted my cup to my lips. If my intent was to use the alcohol to warm up, it helped if I had more than one sip in me.

Niall peaked over the rim of his own cup at me as I chugged down a few gulps.

“What?” I asked.

“Nervous?” He laughed.

“Shut up,” I said lightly and took another pointed sip, keeping my eyes on his.

He just smiled back at me, amusement dancing across his features.

This is what I lived for. I was in one of my favourite places in the world, with my best friends, surrounded by an energy that just seemed to heighten and sharpen all my thoughts and emotions. I was experiencing bliss.

I thought about all of my worries over the past month. I’d been made to feel unsafe and had experienced the gnawing worry of opening up to someone and risking my established friends in the process. I had gone back and forth with myself on how to feel safe. I had slept poorly because of the unease in my brain.

I had put my body through difficult training in the gym and the torture of copious amounts stress and what it was doing to me--circles under my eyes, what felt like a small ulcer in my stomach, near constant exhaustion despite my inability to fall asleep quickly most nights, and what I had realized was a compulsive need to double or occasionally triple check my locks every night.

But right here with my friends, in this moment, I felt everything negative and stressful just leave my body. I knew the feeling wouldn't last, so I revelled in it. Didn't think about the end of it, only thought about the now.

I could feel Niall’s eyes on me, and they were often on me throughout the evening. Whenever big things happened I felt his eyes on me, gauging my reaction and taking it in. When he wasn't watching me, he was actually watching the game. Everyone--excluding me and Liam--was teasing Niall about it being the one sport he couldn't get behind and asking him if we were doing any good at changing his perception.

In a moment of clarity, between innings, I had heard him answer that if anyone could change his perception it would be the lot of us. Harry cheered at that and confused a few of the fans around us as to what was going on, and they looked around, curious to see if they were missing something.

Throughout the game as the score fluctuated--we were up first, they came back, we levelled, they went ahead again--Liam and I were in absolute agony, especially as the game came down to the last inning. I can admit though that it was an absolute cracker of a game to watch. There was a fair bit of excitement.

It was only game one of the series. and there would have to be at least three more to come no matter what, but you never want to be the first to drop a game, especially with a home-field advantage.

I really found myself while watching baseball in college. I'd take a textbook and a notebook and pretend I was going to study or do practice problems as I sat in the sun on a warm Saturday afternoon, but the books would always remain closed as I watched the game, or just closed my eyes and felt the sun soak over me.

It was a way to relax. A bit like running would help me to clear my head, baseball would give me a way to just sit and feel at peace. It was weird, my attachment to baseball. I wasn't a sports person. I didn't play anything. I ran, but I didn't do anything like volleyball or soccer or lacrosse. So the fact that I'd become so taken with baseball and being at games was a strange happening.

I felt a calm rolling over me as the first out of the bottom of the ninth came in and it looked bad for us. I shouldn't have felt calm at all. In fact, the nervous energy I felt was causing me to practically vibrate, but underneath it, I felt a feeling of peace just being here in the first place.

Liam and I were mirrors of each other. We were each leaning forward in our seats with our elbows resting on our knees, our hands locked together in front of our mouths. I felt Niall put his hand on my knee as we got a runner on base. His warm touch was spreading through me, radiating his ease into me. It wasn't working. Even Niall, the force that could calm me in any other situation, wasn't working for baseball.

We’d each had a second beer (because why not spend a small fortune on beer that's ten dollars cheaper just outside the stadium walls?) and it had made Harry very talkative behind us. Between him and Cleo, the banter was borderline funny, but I honestly kept forgetting to laugh.

Niall squeezed my knee as the next batter stepped up to the plate. We were in dangerous territory, double-play-could-go-against-us territory, a fact that even Niall knew. Louis has been explaining things to him all night. Niall knew the basics of the game, three strikes, three outs, the concept of a double play, and a home run, but Louis was getting into strategy, which I think made it more real.

Despite my nerves, I looked over at Niall. He was trying and that made me give a small smile. I looked back down at the field but nudged him with my shoulder and he squeezed my knee again.

Liam groaned as strike one flew over the plate.

And then it happened.

The crack of the wooden bat echoed around the park and the ball sailed far and fast, landing just over the wall and in the fourth row of seats.

The air was incredibly still, almost like everyone else was also having a hard time believing what we’d seen, was holding their breath. And then Liam and I snapped into the present. And so did everyone else. The thunder, the roar of the crowd was deafening as the stadium erupted in euphoria. A walk-off home run.

It was only game one, I kept telling myself, but as I leapt from my seat and yelled and clapped I couldn't help but be optimistic. Hope is the thing with the feathers.

Five nights later we were huddled in what Louis had dubbed ‘Niall’s Old Bar’ a half-block from Wrigley. Apparently, Niall still had some influence there, because unlike everyone else we didn't have to start lining up to get in at ass o’clock in the morning. We did get here a bit early, but nothing too unmanageable.

“This is batshirt crazy!” Ana called as we--the entire bar--just finished another rendition of ‘Go, Cubs, Go!’ during a commercial break in the seventh inning. The series was 3-2 in favour of the Cubs, and tonight could either see us win or see us go even and leave it to a final game seven

Everyone here was really hoping for the first option. The win it all tonight option.

The Irish Oak was packed to capacity and we were currently waiting for our food. We’d ordered almost every appetizer on the menu to split amongst the group of us all, and we were on our second round of drinks at this point.

It was a Sunday. We all had work tomorrow. I'm sure our customers at the bakery would understand, but they wouldn't be too happy. And the teachers couldn't exactly show up with raging hangovers. However, Liam seemed to incline that regardless of the outcome he would be drinking himself to sleep tonight.

We sat huddled around a tall table right below a television screen and my face was right beside a picture of Anthony Rizzo’s butt--not that I was complaining. The whole lot of us was more than content with our situation.

“I won't say I'm a fan or anything like that,” Niall trailed off as he sat down beside me. He’d gotten up to talk to the manager, thank her for letting us ‘reserve’ our spot, basically and had missed Cleo’s screech singing and Harry’s falsetto. Liam, despite his nerves, decided to participate and sang quite loudly in that baritone voice of his.

“But?” I asked as he sipped his drink.

“But being part of these past few nights has been really great craic,” he said.

“Oh fork off with the Irish slang,” Louis teased as the commercial break ended and the bottom of the inning began. The Cubs were up 5-3 but had dropped game two after leading so we were all agreeing to be cautiously optimistic. Except for Liam who was just cautious.

“I will not fork off, mate,” Niall said. “In fact just for that, I'm going to speak Irish.” Niall took a large sip of his Guinness, almost as if to prove his Irish-ness.

“You don't even know your own language.” Louis rolled his eyes. “That's an empty threat.”

“I'd learn the language just to annoy the piss out of you,” Niall said.

“Honestly, I don't doubt that you would do that.” Louis smiled and held up his glass, which Niall then clinked his own glass against, a bright smile on his face. In fact, they both wore the same expression.

Ana’s face brightened considerably and I knew what that meant: food. Sure enough, when I looked up and followed her gaze a server was coming up to us with a tray loaded with food.

It was wonderful.

Truth be told though, I was too nervous to eat. Liam looked at the food as if just seeing it made him sick. I always felt like Liam and I did our best bonding when talking about--or watching--baseball. Sure we connected on other levels, but there was this level we occupied away from everyone else in the group.

I know Liam can be quick to judge and that to others he may seem critical and impatient, but truth be told he was anything but. He was judgy because he was protective of his friends, and critical because he was protective of himself. His impatience stemmed from dealing with children all day. When he was away from that environment he preferred not to waste time and energy and just move along. Loyalty was Liam’s biggest strong suit. He was never not supportive.

I loved bonding with Liam like this. Words weren’t needed. We just silently appreciated the similarities between us and that was more than enough. Liam and I were the perfect partnership when it came to watching baseball.

Everyone else started in on whatever they could get their hands on first though. From the corner of my eyes, I could see Niall. If I had learned anything about him in the two weeks or so that we’d been together, it was that he loved food. All food. He was a vacuum.

Nothing was going for the Cubs in the seventh so it went to commercial before the start of the eighth. Two more innings of pain and uncertainty.

One of the good things about the last six nights was Niall wearing a baseball cap every single night. I couldn't tell whether or not he was doing it on purpose because of me and what I'd said about him in a cap, or because it was one of the very few items of paraphernalia he owned. It could have been a combination of the two things.

Brian had cancelled self-defence classes on Thursday so I didn't have to come up with an excuse to be late to our viewing party. I was thankful for that. The gym had sent out an email that morning to all the members of the class and my discomfort over thinking up excuses just eased away with my morning tea as Louis flitted around the kitchen.

Although I didn’t have to stress over my making excuses with my friends, I could feel the extra tension in my shoulders from not going to the class this week. It felt wrong. I missed the routine of it, of going and being in a place where I was pretty sure everyone knew--from my bruising the first class--why I was there and why being there was important to me.

If the only person who really knew was Brian and I could be free and not have to worry about keeping it a secret, then not going was like shaking a bottle of soda until the top was bound to pop off and everything would spurt out in the messiest of fashions.

Even though Brian had mentioned a noticeable change in me before and after class, I hadn’t really paid attention to just how necessary the effects were in terms of getting through a week normally. I felt antsy these past few days. I felt like I was on the edge of my seat, metaphorically speaking, and that someone would come up at any moment and pull the seat out from under me. I wasn’t looking over my shoulder every ten seconds on my walk home or on my run over the weekends, but I did feel unsettled.

I didn’t know if my friends could tell. I was getting better at keeping the secret from them, I thought. Once the initial shock of the event wore off, it became second nature to keep it to myself. If they had noticed I was on edge though recently, maybe they attributed it to the series and my stress over the outcome. I suppose that gave me a good cloaking excuse for any noticeable tension and uncomfortable behaviour.

I had been worried that by getting closer with Niall that he would begin to notice my being off; however, I’d only know Niall as what I had dubbed Post-Attack Ruby--aka my new normal. I felt like that gave me a little bit more leeway with him.

“Shirt,” Liam cursed under his breath across the table from me.

I looked over at him and then up at the television. The score was now 5-4 as the inning shifted. We would have to either maintain or add to our lead in order to win. I’d been so lost in thought that I’d completely missed what had happened.

I felt a hand on my shoulder.

“You want anything?” Niall asked, his eyes watching me with concern as I shook off my thoughts and brought myself back into the present.

I looked down at the food on the table and made a face.

“I’m not all that hungry,” I said.

“No?” he asked, knowing I hadn’t eaten since lunch.

“I’m honestly too nervous to eat,” I said and glanced over at the screen. Still a commercial. I could breathe.

“Are you really?” he asked. I just looked at him. He smiled. “Six nights in and I still can’t believe you’re the type of person to get this nervous about baseball.”

I just shrugged while I thought about what he was saying. Even when I expressed my love for it, even when he’d teased me for being nervous the previous nights, he was still relatively new to the whole experience. He moved his hand from my shoulder to my back and leaned in and kissed my cheek.

I felt my face flush and refused to look up to see if any of our friends had seen him do it. I got hit with a napkin though and when I looked up to see who’d thrown it Cleo was giving me a smirk. I rolled my eyes and threw the napkin back at her before turning my eyes back to the television, but I had a smirk on my lips and the flush on my face as the game returned from commercial.

Adrenaline has a way of staying in your system long after the moment is over. After the euphoric yells and cheers that had bounded across the walls of the bar and echoed throughout the streets, after the songs had been sung and the celebratory beers had been downed, and the pictures in front of the stadium and the marquee had been taken I could still feel the adrenaline, the excitement as it coursed through me and gave me a jittery feeling, the good kind of jittery feeling.

Niall had walked me home. With the packed streets and the lights and the partying, it was now the early hours of the morning. I couldn’t care less that I had to be up in a few hours for my kickboxing class and then spend an entire day at work. I was on top of the world. I’d high fived so many strangers, taken pictures for others, and had just ridden a high the whole time.

I wasn’t regretting a moment of it, and I wouldn’t regret a moment of it when I woke up. I was genuinely happy at the moment. No stress, nothing to make me feel heavy, and no worries about anything… I felt light. I felt like I was walking on air as Niall held my hand and guided me through the crowded streets toward my apartment.

His cheeks had been flushed from the singing and the yelling--and the beers he’d downed--before. He was walking with a spring in his step as well, and he just listened to me as I talked through all big plays and moments from the game and doted on so many of the players. He’d nod and make affirmative sounds at all the right times, the amusement clear upon his fair features.

It was cold, colder than it had been the other night in the stadium, but with the alcohol and the excitement, I didn’t feel it. Even as the wind rushed past me, even as the leaves swirled around my feet, and my breath came out in puffs before me, I didn’t notice the cold that was trying to bite at my fingers and nip at my nose and cheeks. It was irrelevant to me in this state. Nothing could get to me.

When we got to my front door I bit my lip and once the door was open I turned to him. Seeing him in the baseball cap and the Cubs gear I couldn’t help myself. Maybe it was the adrenaline still, or maybe it was the high from the win, maybe it was the alcohol, but when I turned to say goodnight I opened my mouth and then closed it, and made a split second decision.

I grabbed him by his jacket, and pulled him inside with me, crashing my mouth against his as he tried to close the door behind himself. It took him a hot minute, his hands fumbling to complete the task while his eyes were closed and I pressed myself against him, my mouth moving against his, but the moment it was closed--and locked--his hands were on my waist as mine flew up to his face. One hand shifted and tangled itself in his soft hair, knocking his hat to the floor behind him and pulling a bit at the base of his neck, and one holding his cheek.

It felt feverish as he pushed me back against the wall and our bodies aligned, the entire lengths of us pressed together and causing a blaze to rip through me from my head down to my toes. His touch felt like it was going to chemically react with whatever fire was already going on inside me and I would explode. His fingers slipped under the hem of my shirt and their contact with my skin caused me to gasp against his lips.

He took the opportunity and before I could bring my brain up to speed with what was happening, his tongue was tangled with mine in an experience that was putting everyone I’d ever kissed before in my life to shame. How dare they kiss me and have been any less than this? It felt like this was truly the first time I’d really been kissed like this, every other boy, every other kiss fading from my memories until all that remained was Niall and the feeling he was inducing as we made out in my front entryway.

I tugged his hair a bit and he growled. I swear to god my knees buckled upon hearing it, feeling it against my lips as it escaped from him. I smirked against his mouth and tugged again.

“Fork,” he gasped out as I pulled my mouth from his and began kissing my way along his chin until I reached the spot behind his ear. He shivered when my teeth grazed the spot and my tongue followed after them.

“Jesus, Ruby.” His voice was ragged, and his chest was heaving against mine as our bodies fought to intake enough oxygen to sustain us at this moment. I could feel his pulse in my lips on his neck. It was racing.

I brought my lips back to his and I could taste the many pints of Guinness he’d had earlier just as he could surely taste the whiskey I’d downed. He took my bottom lip between his teeth and tugged. Without me telling it to, one of my legs came up and wrapped around his thigh, interlocking us together and pulling him closer yet.

With another shudder he brought one of his hands up to tangle in my hair as the other pushed my shirt up a bit more and settled in the small of my back, his large hand spanning the expanse of my back as he used the leverage to keep me as close as possible.

There was something that passed between us at that moment. The vulnerability of the moment perhaps, as I realised just how long it had been since I’d done this with someone where it wasn’t a fling or a one night deal. It could have been just that at that moment I realised how much I liked him. He had said many times that he wasn’t a baseball fan, had even made some mild complaints throughout the week about how boring it was to watch a game with that many commercial breaks, but here he was six nights later with me after having watched every game at my side.

He had put up with it for me--and our friends--and that made me realise that he’d been willing to do something he wouldn’t normally do because I was invested in the outcome. He had sacrificed his time to spend time with me and to try and understand something I felt passionate about. The thought alone sent a shiver through me as together we slowed our pace and our intensity began to mellow into lingering kisses that made my mind feel like goop.

I lowered my leg back down to the floor as Niall brought his hands to my cheeks, cupping my face gently.

“I love baseball,” Niall said when he eventually pulled away.

I laughed. I laughed like Niall. I felt my head fall back against the wall as my laugh echoed around the small space we occupied and he giggled as he watched my response. When I’d calmed down a bit I looked over his face.

His cheeks were flushed a bright pink, his lips a vibrant, delicious shade of red from our kisses. It was his eyes though that sent an electric shock up my spine. They were glistening in the low light and locked onto mine I felt like I could do anything, accomplish anything in the world. It was my favourite sight in the world, the sight before me.

“Thanks for walking me home,” I said. “And thank you for watching baseball every night for almost a week. I know it’s not your favourite despite your very recent declaration otherwise.”

“I mean, I still don’t understand it, but I honestly think I might be beginning to like it,” he said, his voice somehow both light with elation and gravelly from what we’d just done. The juxtaposition of it all stirred something in me and I had to resist pulling him back against me for round two.

“You don’t have to lie.”

“M’not lying.”

“Okay.” My tone conveyed my disbelief.

“I’ll see you on Tuesday?” he asked.

“I’ll see you on Tuesday.” I nodded. I watched as he disentangled himself from me--I instantly mourned the loss of his hand against my back--and bent to pick up his hat from the floor.

“Sleep well, Ruby.” The kiss he pressed against my lips was the sweetest thing I’d ever experienced. It was sweeter than the triple chocolate brownies Louis baked every Thursday. I felt the kiss through my entire body as he brushed his thumb against my cheek and pulled back.

I nodded as he opened my door and stepped out.

“Let me know when you get home safely,” I called out to him as he opened my gate.

He gave a nod and slipped the hat back on his head before heading off into the night.

[chronotopes]

multiples of 3!

the classic … u can’t beat it 

under a cut to spare everyone else

3. what color are your eyes?

brown B) 

6. describe your personality in 3 words or less

good-naturedly pretentious

9. where do you shop?

for clothes? mostly tj maxx tbh altho these days i’m using second-hand stores more often. otherwise i feel like the shopping establishments (online and otherwise) that take up the most of my money are thriftbooks and trader joe’s

12. what size bed do you have

twin

15. favorite snapchat filters

snapchat filters are a bastard institution but i make an exception for some of the seasonal ones for fall and december. like the one that gives u glasses and puts pumpkins behind u is cute

18. favorite tv show

star trek deep space nine (also are we sure that one qualifies as ‘unusual’?

21. sandals and sneakers

sneakers but by sneakers i mean the vaguely artgirl trendy ones i get from ecco, not, like, the shit my brother does sports in 

24. how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? 

i feel like it’s like two dollars but i’m too lazy to check 

27. do you have a job? what do you do? 

when school starts back up i’ll be working at my school’s writing center but for now i’m a receptionist at the tennis center my dad goes to. what i do is book people courts, try to remember people’s names, sign kids up for summer camps, and write deep space nine fanfiction. it’s a pretty good set up plus i get paid almost unreasonably well for how much i do which is very little

30. what’s your favorite scent?

yankee candle apple spice potpourri, with that said i’ve tried to move away from scented candles

edit what the fuck i genuinely read this as saying “scented candle”????? my favorite scents are pine and citrus 

33. favorite actor? 

good question! nobody comes to mind

36. favorite movie? 

when harry met sally

39. do you have a nickname? what is it? 

gene calls me kapita and liam (& sometimes stephen) calls me kapia 

42. do you take any medications daily? 

zyrtec during periods of fall and spring eyyy

45. how many kids do you want 

from zero to two (but probably either zero or two)

48. who is your role model? 

i don’t know if i can claim to have a singular role model but i guess if i had to go for one my mom would come the closest

51. how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?

well i was more of a ded moroz girl first of all but i think i started suspecting the logistics and coming up with reasonable alternatives around seven or eight, and stopped believing altogether about a year later. the details are hazy, it doesn’t stand out as a big memory

54. do you go to college?

going back in two weeks!

57. do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?

very rarely bc i’m rlly picky about what i put in my hair

60. how many pictures do you have on your phone? 

2,235! :0

63. do you prefer chicken nuggets from wendy’s or mcdonalds?

ngl have never had either

66. have you ever won a spelling bee?

came in second place after my 8th grade crush/gay awakening!

69. do you play an instrument?

i played piano a long long time ago

72. starbucks or dunkin donuts?

[malcolm gladwell voice] DUNKINNNNN

75. are you going to change your last name when you get married? 

hell no that baby and i have been through too much together

78. do you sleep with your door open or closed?

CLOSED CLOSED CLOSED

81. last person you called?

called liam which turned into a conference call with him & gene

84. chocolate or rainbow sprinkles

rainbow but also i can leave em altogether

87. are you outgoing or shy?

depends on the setting. in general i’d go with outgoing but kinda weird

90. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?

yes yes and yes but i only use cleanser at night

93. last thing you ate?

a piece of chocolate

96. day or night?

both r good

99. what is your zodiac sign?

LEO! 

[bevioletskies]

(there’s no place like) home for the holidays

summary: After the chaos of trying to fit every single festive tradition into last year's holiday season, the Guardians decide to do something a little bit more low-key this Christmas - visiting Peter's hometown for the first time as a team. However, it may be more of an emotional rollercoaster than Peter, Gamora, or anyone could have bargained for.

word count: 10.2k

a/n: If you haven’t read the main fic, all you need to know is: the Guardians attend a superhero school on Earth, and therefore are approximately ten years younger than their movie counterparts. Peter and Gamora are in an established relationship after being in a fake one for a few months, and Mantis and Nebula have been together for a little while, too.

Fic title is from the song (There's No Place Like) Home For The Holidays by Perry Como.

ao3 | tag | masterpost

“C’mon, guys, how hard is it to pack? We spend, like, eighty percent of our time on this ship, all our stuff should already be here!” Peter’s voice echoed down the corridor of the Milano, but no response seemed to follow. He paused. “Uh, hello?”

Mantis was first to pop her head out of her room, leaning out of the doorway in a rather comical fashion. “Should I bring a hat? How cold is it in Missouri?”

“Cold enough. Bring a hat,” Peter instructed. She smiled in silent gratitude and promptly went back into her room. He grinned to himself, feeling giddy and nervous and excitable all the same, then turned back to his own duffel bag sat by his feet on the communal living room floor, zipped up and ready to go.

It was a trip he’d been talking about for months on end, something he and Gamora had kept in mind ever since they visited Peter’s hometown a little over a year ago, soon after they had started dating. Since then, there had been all sorts of obstacles in the way - school, for the most part, since Gamora wasn’t about to let everyone skip classes, especially now that Yondu was actually putting in some effort - that prevented them from doing so, and honestly, Peter had been apprehensive about what it would mean to the others. It meant a lot to him, of course, to bring his new family to the place where he’d grown up with his old one, but he wasn’t sure if the Guardians, all of whom had lost homes and loved ones, would feel like he was showing off somehow. The team had been incredibly solid over the last year, sharing a sense of ease and camaraderie he didn’t think would ever be possible with such mismatched personalities and temperaments, and he didn’t want to risk that.

Still, it was Mantis who eventually convinced him it would be a good idea, saying she would be honored to see the place he’d grown up, the place he’d shared with his mother. “Just because we do not have homes to go back to, does not mean that we can’t go with you to yours,” she had said. “I would very much like to go, Peter.”

And now, they were on break for the holidays, New York was just as crisp as ever, and like last year, most of the school’s campus was a ghost town, now that practically the entire student body had returned home for the two weeks they were given before coming back to the grind of heroism and college-level academia. The Guardians, meanwhile, were due to take off from the hangar bay in about thirty minutes, and, in their typical Guardian-like fashion, were woefully behind on packing.

“Quill.”

Peter nearly jumped three feet in the air at the sound of an ever-so-monotonous voice behind him, whipping around to look at the culprit. “Dammit, Nebula, you scared me.”

“Good,” she snarked, folding her arms across her chest. “Why aren’t we doing a system check yet?”

“Pretty much everyone else is still packing, I’m not gonna lock up the ship if they still have stuff back in their dorms,” Peter replied, hastily folding his arms as well. “Why don’t you make yourself useful, go help your girlfriend instead of spookin’ me?”

“So now she’s my girlfriend and not your sister?” Nebula snorted. “And I despise that word. It makes us sound like children.”

“Well, my sister loves that word,” Peter teased. “And so does your sister, or should I say, my girlfriend.”

Nebula stalked past him towards Mantis’s room with an impressive eye roll on her way out. “You’re terrible, Quill.”

“Good talk,” he called after her, unabashedly pleased with himself, though he had a feeling he was going to pay for it later.

Peter then made his way up the ladder despite knowing the others weren’t ready yet, grinning when he emerged in the cockpit and saw a certain somebody who was already well-prepared and sitting in her seat, tapping her foot impatiently. She turned at the sound of his footsteps. “Peter?”

“I’d just like to say, for the record, that I’m not the one who’s behind,” he said defensively, dropping a brief kiss on Gamora’s cheek before sitting opposite her.

“I think I’d be more proud of you if it wasn’t me who insisted you pack three nights ago,” she retorted, but she smiled regardless. “You’re excited, I’d imagine. It’s been too long since you’ve returned.”

“We’ve returned,” he corrected. “I still think about that weekend sometimes. Hanging out with you in the park that I spent all my summers in, sitting in my school’s parking lot...visiting my mom’s grave. Plus, y’know, we’d only been dating for a month at the time, but after we came back, I was already sure that you and me were gonna make it all the way.”

“Which is strange, since I found myself doubting it,” Gamora said softly, reaching over to rest her hand on his knee. “I don’t feel that way anymore. I know that this works, that us, that our family, it all works. Not perfectly, but...in the ways that we need it to. And I’m glad we get to do this with them.”

“So am I,” Peter murmured. He placed his hand over hers and squeezed. “It seems like we’re always doing somethin’ for school or for a job. This’ll be our first real vacation together.” He straightened up, half-smirking, half-wincing in anticipation. “Though if it’s like a typical family vacation, we’re probably gonna be screamin’ at each other and arguin’ over directions soon enough.”

“Don’t spoil it, Peter, I thought you were supposed to be the idealist between the two of us,” she teased. “Let me think about how everything can and will go wrong.”

With almost comically precise timing, a loud crash resonated from below, causing the entire ship to tremble with the force of whatever it was that had apparently just exploded. Peter groaned, getting up to open the hatch and poke his head through. “Stop destroying my ship, we don’t got insurance!” he shouted. ______

The flight to Missouri was easy enough, with minimal complaints, mostly because pretty much everyone took a nap. Once they touched down at a private airfield and piled into a rental vehicle, however, it was an entirely different story.

“I am Groot,” Groot wailed.

“Your toys are in your bag and your bag is in the trunk, we’re not getting your stuffed animals for a twenty-minute car ride,” Gamora said firmly from the driver’s seat, though it only made him even crankier.

“Drax, buddy, you’re gonna have to shuffle over so you don’t squish us,” Peter said, who currently had his elbow in Nebula’s gut, and was certain he was about to lose said elbow if Drax didn’t move and give the cramped backseat some breathing room.

“I hate this,” Nebula said loudly to anyone who would listen, though Mantis wasn’t even looking her way; instead, she had her face pressed up against the window, partially to look at the thick blanket of snow (as if it hadn’t been snowing profusely in New York when they left), but mostly because she was getting shoved, too.

Arriving at the hotel was similarly uncomfortable; the other patrons stared at them unashamedly as they walked into the lobby, hefting far too many bags for a week’s stay on their shoulders and still squabbling over their sore backs and bruised egos. Thankfully, Gamora had remembered to call ahead, and they were swiftly checked into their respective rooms before anything else could happen.

“Remember, Peter and I are in this room, so if you need anything - ”

“Knock first,” Rocket muttered under his breath, causing Yondu to chortle heartily. Groot laughed, too, even though he didn’t understand the joke. They were all rewarded with Gamora’s death glare.

“Are you looking to go straight back home, Rocket?” she said testily. “Believe me, I can make it happen.”

“No, ma’am,” Rocket drawled, smirking.

Gamora huffed. “As I was saying, Peter and I are in this room, you and Groot have that one, Yondu and Drax are in that one down there - ”

“I didn’t agree to this,” Yondu interrupted, holding up his hand like they were back in class.

“ - and Nebula and Mantis are over there,” Gamora finished, folding her arms across her chest. “Everyone go unpack and rest, and come meet us in our room for dinner at seven.”

Once she and Peter went into their room and set their bags aside to be unpacked in a moment, he collapsed onto the bed with a heavy sigh. “Starting to wonder if I should’ve come back here with just you instead.”

Gamora turned to look at him from where she was knelt by her own bag. “You don’t mean that,” she said quietly.

“I dunno, it just seems like vacations are more stress than they’re worth. I don’t wanna come outta this hating everyone,” he grumbled, staring listlessly at the ceiling.

“We just got here, Peter. I know you were scared last time. I really do,” she said, sitting beside him. “You were afraid of confronting your past. I don’t think anyone wants to open old wounds, but you still handled it really well. What is it this time?”

He turned onto his side so he could properly look at her, reaching over to rest his hand on her knee. “Can’t hide nothin’ from you, can I?” he chuckled. “It’s just that...we’re getting closer to graduating, and I really like what we’re doing right now. Going to school during the week, saving the galaxy on weekends. It’s the kind of stuff I dreamed about as a kid. Well, not the school part. The ‘being a hero’ part, where we get to travel through space and have cool adventures and do all sorts of stuff that I didn’t think would ever exist outside of my own over-imaginative brain.”

“You’re worried it’s all going to go away,” Gamora guessed. He nodded silently. “Well...I can’t tell you there’s no chance it won’t. But I can tell you that we’ll do everything in our power to make sure it doesn’t. All of us.”

“It feels like we’re one bad day away from falling apart sometimes.” Peter inched slightly closer, moving to rest his head in her lap. She automatically began threading her fingers through his hair in reassurance. “And I don’t think that’s ever gonna stop.”

“We’re combative, stubborn people. I’ll admit that I’m probably the most stubborn of us all,” she said with a rueful smile. “I hope that stubbornness means we fight to stay together, not that we’ll drive each other apart. I want to graduate knowing we’ve made a difference, and that we’re going to continue making a difference.”

“I want that, too,” he said, finally looking up to meet her eyes. “I got ideas, y’know. For the team, and, well...for us.”

“Us?” Gamora repeated, quirking an eyebrow.

He laughed, the tension in his jaw finally releasing. “We can talk about it another time. Right now...I wouldn’t mind a nap before dinner.”

To his disappointment, Gamora gently moved his head aside so she could stand up, gesturing towards their abundance of luggage sitting by the closet doors. “Not yet, Peter. First, we have to unpack.”

He groaned, sluggishly dragging himself upright. “And we were having such a nice moment, too.” ______

Everyone seemed mellowed out and well-rested by morning - unsurprising since the hotel beds were far nicer than the Milano’s mattresses - though Peter had a feeling that was going to change. After some subpar food, courtesy of the hotel’s complimentary breakfast, they all bundled up and got back into their rental, ready to start their day.

When the car pulled up to the curbside along the park, Nebula peered through the window in apprehension. “It looks...busy.”

“Course it is, practically no one’s at school or work this time of year,” Peter said dismissively. “C’mon, let’s go!”

As expected, Peter, Groot, and Mantis were the most enthused at the sight before them, a fairly typical public park now covered in a generous sheet of blindingly white snow, its playground and benches completely rendered inaccessible by the weather. It seemed mostly populated by families and the elderly, with the occasional jogger passing through that made even Drax shiver.

Unlike the last time she’d been here, Gamora was more on her guard than ever; there were far more people this time around, and despite trusting her sister, she still couldn’t stop herself from eyeing the small pocket knife on Nebula’s utility belt, concealed in its own pocket bag. Heads were already beginning to turn in their direction, just like the hotel lobby, and most of the returning expressions were far from friendly.

“Tell us about this place, Peter,” Mantis prompted, and he began the spiel he’d told Gamora last year, telling anecdotes of his childhood upbringing, how he’d played on all the equipment with other children and came away with scrapes and bruises, spent hours at the waterpark or just sitting under a tree with his mom, simultaneously listening to music and reading a good book. The others seemed captivated by his usual animated storytelling, all but one.

“I was worried before, too,” Gamora said quietly, interlocking arms with her sister. “Not everyone we see in public is our enemy. They’re just curious.”

It was a testament to Nebula’s nerves that she didn’t immediately have a snappish response. “Do they know who we are?” she murmured, itching to reach for her blade. “Do they fear us?”

“If it helps, just pretend they’re looking at Rocket,” Gamora said, smiling wryly. “Remember what we were taught?”

“To assume the worst,” Nebula said flatly.

Gamora shook her head. “No, Nebula, not what we were taught by Thanos. What we learned in school. The first strategy of engagement is defense, not offense.” Still, there was one particular older couple that seemed to be looking them up and down derisively in a way that even made Gamora twitch.

They progressed further into the park, which was far more extensive than everyone but Peter and Gamora had expected. When they heard the faint sounds of horns and strings in the distance, Rocket was the first to groan. “Aw, man, it’s like you planned this!”

Peter perked up instantly. “We definitely gotta check that out!”

And so, they were all dragged in the direction of the music, coming across a small glass observatory covered in overgrown plants, its doors thrown wide open despite the chill, with a small gathering of musicians right in its center. People were standing close by, either observing, or to Peter’s delight, dancing about in an unabashedly joyous fashion.

“Terrans are some of the strangest people I’ve ever met,” Drax sighed, moving to clear off a nearby picnic table so he could sit down and wait for the inevitable. Yondu and Rocket also went to join him, leaving Groot with Mantis. “What does all this swaying and foot-tapping nonsense accomplish?”

“Beats me,” Rocket shrugged.

With a single pleading look, Peter managed to get Gamora to join him, wrapping his arms around her and holding her close. It was so commonplace for them to dance nowadays that they immediately found their hand positions on their respective shoulders and waists, smiling fondly at each other, though they knew they were going to get teased for it the moment they returned to their friends.

“I’m slightly concerned that this has become second nature for us,” Gamora said lightly. “Are you sure you didn’t set this up beforehand?”

“I really didn’t,” Peter chuckled. “What can I say? Music just follows me wherever I go.”

“Maybe those musical films you showed me weren’t so far off from your reality, after all,” she said with a teasing mirth in her voice.

“Next thing you know, I’m gonna start talking to animals, too,” he joked, turning to look over at Rocket. “Oh, wait - ”

“Peter,” she said firmly, pinching his waist to get him to look back at her with a wince.

“Alright, sorry, bad joke - ”

Nebula, meanwhile, was sat stoutly at the table with Drax, Yondu, and Rocket, glaring up at Mantis, who was standing over her with one hand outstretched. “No. I will not give in like my sister clearly has. Gamora will have no dignity left by the time we leave this wretched town.”

“You danced with me at Wasp’s holiday party last week,” Mantis reminded her. “Well, I suppose it was more like you stood still while I rocked us back and forth, but I think that still counts.”

“That was among people we know.” Nebula turned away, almost embarrassed by her own reasoning. “We can’t trust these people.”

“But do you trust me?” Mantis then smiled. “Silly question, I know you do. But do you trust me to trust everyone else?”

Nebula hesitated once more, and then slowly got to her feet, finally accepting Mantis’s hand. “Then I’ll blame you when things go wrong.”

“If things go wrong,” Mantis said cheerily, weaving them both through the crowd to join Peter and Gamora, who looked equal parts stunned and impressed that she’d managed to get Nebula to join her. Gamora reached over to squeeze her sister’s shoulder in silent praise, only to get shaken off immediately, as expected.

“Oh, how the mighty’ve fallen,” Yondu snickered, twirling his arrow absentmindedly between his fingers. “We gotta get a picture of this, we ain’t never letting her live this down.”

“And get castrated once she catches us? No thanks,” Rocket scoffed.

“I am Groot?” Groot asked, still grumpy after being unceremoniously dumped onto the table with the others.

“It is not something someone your age should know about,” Drax said gravely.

Nebula took tiny, stiff steps in her minimal attempts to keep up with Mantis’s boisterous, unrefined movements, her hands resting lightly on Mantis’s waist. The music was beginning to pick up speed, and a singer had now joined in, the voice echoing about in Nebula’s head, consuming her attuned sense of sound, the way music sounded to her whenever Peter unapologetically cranked up the volume on the Milano. All she could focus on now was the eyes that followed them, people straining their necks around their dance partners to get a better look at their faces, like they couldn’t believe what they were seeing. Some seemed confused, others worried, all clinging a little bit tighter to those they were familiar with.

“They’re staring at us,” Nebula whispered, ducking her head so her mouth was right at Mantis’s ear.

“Terrans seem so judgemental,” Mantis sighed. “When we first got together, Peter showed me all these articles about marriage equality and hate crimes - ”

“Not because we’re both girls,” Nebula interrupted. “Because we are both not of this world.”

“We have lived here for three years now, along with many others that come from all over the galaxy. It is not our responsibility to make them comfortable with their prejudices by hiding who we are, especially since we have never done them any harm,” Mantis insisted.

Nebula paused. “What do you feel?”

“They are curious,” Mantis said quietly. “Some of them are hesitant about whether to stay or go. Maybe they think it will offend us and cause more problems. But...some are happy to see us.”

Nebula tilted her head inquisitively. “Who?”

“Excuse me.” All four of them looked down to see a group of at least eight children, the oldest no older than ten, crowded around them in every direction. “Are you the Guardians?”

Gamora and Nebula exchanged worried glances; Peter, by contrast, puffed out his chest and lowered his voice by at least an octave. “Yes, we are. How can we help you?”

One of them held up an old napkin with a sheepish smile. “Could we have your autographs?”

Peter’s usual roguish grin was softened instantly into something far sweeter, an expression the others preferred greatly over his posturing. “Yeah, of course. But c’mon, let’s get out of this crowd and head over there before you get trampled, okay?” They all nodded eagerly, following him to the picnic table.

Gamora and Mantis, meanwhile, paused to turn to Nebula. She glared back. “They don’t want me, you’re wasting your time. Go on.”

“You don’t know that,” Gamora said gesturing for Nebula to join them. “Please.” When it was clear neither of them were moving, Nebula stalked past them with a bitter grunt, wondering whether to reconsider the company she kept.

Once they caught up to the others, they found Peter charming the children with slightly exaggerated tales of their adventures, along with stories about the other Academy students that were crowd favorites. “What’s it like, getting to hang out with Thor every day?” one of them asked.

“He’s okay, not as good-looking as you’d think,” Peter shrugged, which caused Rocket and Yondu to snicker under their breaths once again. “Hey, the girls are here!”

The children instantly turned their way, holding out their bits of scrap paper expectantly. Mantis got right to it, while Gamora’s tight smile gradually relaxed over time as some of the little girls told her how she’d inspired them to try karate classes and sign up for their school’s sports teams. Nebula was the most taken aback when some of them reached for her as well, more apprehensive towards her than the others, but still determined to get her autograph, too.

“You know who I am,” Nebula said flatly. They nodded, hands still outstretched. Sighing laboriously, she snatched Peter’s pen right out of his hand, his protests falling on deaf ears, and began scribbling across their papers as well.

Once they were finally finished, the children chorused their thank you’s and sprinted off to rejoin their parents. Nebula sat back down again next to Drax, silently making her decision of what to do next very clear. To her surprise, Mantis didn’t protest and merely sat beside her.

Peter, of course, pulled Gamora back into the crowd, still delighted by how much she embraced it, embraced him nowadays, and buried his face into her neck, partially for the warmth, but mostly for the comfort of just how well he fit there. “Man, I love it when that stuff happens. Makes it feel like we’re actually doing what we set out to do. Like you said - makin’ a difference.”

“And it strokes your ego all the same,” Gamora deadpanned, but she was smiling regardless. “I like it, too.”

All you need is love, all you need is love...all you need is love, love, love is all you need… ______

Nebula was half-asleep on her hotel bed when the door opened. Expecting it to be Gamora, she grumbled and turned face-down into her pillow. “I have no interest in talking to you, sister.”

“It is just me.” Mantis shut the door behind her, kicked off her shoes, and promptly crawled onto the bed to join Nebula, lying by her side. She was careful not to touch her. “You have become even more reclusive than usual. I thought our first day here went very well, when we were at the park with all those people, but then yesterday and today...what happened?”

“I thought a person with your abilities would understand the concept of mood swings,” Nebula grouched. “You and Gamora both seem to think something utterly catastrophic needs to happen to justify my anger.”

“I do not think we think that,” Mantis said quietly. “I think we are hoping that it is only that, so there is something we can do to help. But if there is no cause...then we are helpless to watch.”

“You aren’t helpless. You read me, all the time, even when I ask you not to.” Nebula slowly turned over onto her back, staring up at the ceiling. “I could ask you what I’m feeling right now, and you would know better than I do.”

“I wish I couldn’t.” Mantis sat up, looking down at Nebula with bittersweet fondness. “I told you all last year that I wanted to focus more on myself, and I have. But I will never be able to shut off my powers. I cannot lose them, like Peter did his. Sometimes, I wish very desperately that my mind was only ever mine, and that I cannot feel everything everyone else does. So that I can be happy when I guess correctly, instead of dreading the fact that I am always right.”

Nebula swallowed. “You know I’m not the one to talk to about this. I never know what you need.”

“I need to know...if maybe we should leave early,” Mantis said slowly. “If you are more uncomfortable than what it is worth. Peter can always bring me back here another time, but if you feel uneasy around all these people, we can go back together.”

“I told you, it wasn’t about the people. It’s...everything.” Nebula’s voice was so quiet, Mantis could barely hear her. “But I know this is important. Not just to your brother, but to everyone, especially you and Gamora. I can accept my own mild discomfort if it means that you’re both...happy.”

Mantis smiled sadly. “And you know it is harder for us to feel happy when you are not. So what do you want, Nebula?”

“Want is a strong word,” Nebula said, her voice almost lilting, teasing, in a way that made Mantis feel privately flattered that she’d elicited such a response out of her, such bold admittance of things that she barely ever told Gamora. “I’ll stay.”

“For me and Gamora?” Mantis laid back down, her dark eyes even wider than usual, reaching over to tangle their fingers together, her smile growing when she noticed the slight twitch in the corners of Nebula’s mouth.

“If I admit to it, will you leave me be already?” Still, Nebula moved closer, inch by inch, bringing their foreheads together. “I swear, you and my sister intend to run me into the ground with your incessant worrying. I’m not a child to be coddled.”

“No, you are not,” Mantis murmured. “You are a person we care about very much.” She brushed a gentle kiss onto Nebula’s cheek, grinning when Nebula turned her head so their lips would meet. After a moment, she broke the kiss. “Should I leave you to nap?”

“You can stay if you want,” Nebula said blithely, though the shine in her eyes told Mantis she definitely had a preference. Beaming victoriously, Mantis curled up against Nebula’s neck, letting out a sigh of content. Nebula carefully draped one arm over Mantis’s arm, resting her hand on the small of her back. It was perhaps the most intimate moment they’d shared yet, and Mantis hoped that Nebula couldn’t hear the way her heart beat rapidly in nervous excitement. “But next year...I’m staying home.”

Mantis laughed. “Home...I like the sound of that.” ______

The wind whistled through everyone’s hair - those who had hair, that is - as they crossed the lawn, causing them all to shiver involuntarily. Otherwise, it was the sort of stillness that was associated with Midwestern winters, where the generous blanket of snow muffled just about every other kind of sound, obscured their vision from seeing anything but what was right in front of their faces. They could barely tell if anyone else was there, too, what with the hum of silence and the lack of movement except for the swaying trees and bare-boned bushes. At most, the only thing they could see, apart from each other, was the plaque at the front entrance: St. Peter Catholic Church Cemetery.

Groot snuggled further down into the faux fur collar of Yondu’s coat, grateful for its warmth; even Drax, of all people, was wearing a jacket (over his bare chest, of course). Nebula, in a rare show of public affection, was braced against Mantis’s side, Rocket trailed behind everyone else with snowflakes clinging to his whiskers, and of course, Peter and Gamora led the way, hand-in-hand.

“You couldn’t have picked a better day, Quill?” Nebula snarked, though some of her bite was lost in the wind.

“It was gonna be cold no matter what,” Peter said defensively. “Come on, it’s just over here.”

He and Gamora knelt down by one particular gravestone, moving to brush out the snow that had built up in its engravings, and laid a modest bouquet of pine branches and holly berries at its base. Mantis was first to join them on the ground, mouthing the words to herself while she did: Meredith Elizabeth Quill - Mother, Daughter, Friend, & Dreamer - 1957 - 1988. The others quickly followed suit.

“So...what now, boy?” Yondu asked uncertainly.

“I just kinda...talk to her. Say whatever’s on my mind,” Peter shrugged.

“Settle in, we’re gonna be here a while,” Rocket muttered out of the corner of his mouth; Gamora turned to glare him into silence.

“So, uh, Mom, it’s been over a year since I came back. Sorry, I’ve been real busy, you know how it is,” Peter chuckled. “I brought Gamora again, along with the other Guardians. Thought it’d be nice for ‘em to meet you, and you can see what kinda crowd I fell into. They’re a little rough, but they’re good people. My people. I’d be a whole different person if it wasn’t for them...and for you, of course.” He shook his head, laughing. “Reminds me of when I was a kid. All them others who said I was such a mama’s boy. I told them there was nothin’ wrong with that, and they had nothing to say back, ‘cos they knew I was right.”

“Anyway...I’ve been showing them around town, all the usual tourist-y stuff. The Lewis & Clark Museum, Fast Lane...even tried bowling, but that didn’t go so well. Guess I should rule out bumper cars and the trampoline park, hey?” Even Nebula found herself cracking the tiniest of smiles at the visualization forming in her head. Either that, or she was mentally mapping out battle tactics for how to do the most possible damage. “We get stared at a bunch. Not so much me, since, y’know, I’m from here, but everyone else for bein’ different. We’ve gotten so used to being at school, where everyone is so weird and so cool in the best kind of ways, that we sometimes forget. I like it better when we can forget.”

“I’ve been too...scared, I guess, about lookin’ for other graves with the Quill name on it. I dunno if I ever wanna find out if Grandpa died. If he died thinkin’ that I’m dead, too. But if I ever see him in town, I’ll give him the biggest damn hug he’s ever gotten, just like when I was a kid. And I’ll tell him I killed the man who killed you. He might drag me back into church and make me repent, but I want him to know.” Peter inhaled sharply. “Do you think he ever turns on the TV anymore? Sees my dumb face plastered all over the evening news when we save the world from some crazy bad guy? Wonders if I’m ever gonna call?”

“Quill,” Yondu said gently, reaching to clap him on the shoulder. Peter barely turned to look at him before turning back, shrugging him off. Yondu’s face faltered.

“I didn’t come here to confess, though. Just wanted to drop in and say hi,” Peter continued, sounding falsely cheerful. “I only ever come back here ‘cos of you. And some selfish part of me wants to relocate your grave to somewhere else, so I don’t have to remind myself of how empty this place feels when you’re not around. But I know this is your home. It just ain’t mine.” He swallowed a harsh lump in his throat that just didn’t want to go away, then abruptly got to his feet and walked off in a random direction without so much as a glance back.

Gamora immediately stood to follow, but Yondu grabbed her wrist to stop her. “Mind if I go? I got some stuff weighin’ on me, and I need t’ make it known.” She nodded silently, sitting back down beside the others, watching worriedly as Yondu went after Peter.

“I suppose I can say a few things,” Gamora said quietly, glancing at the others for their approval. To her surprise, they all nodded encouragingly; even Nebula seemed to be accepting of her request. “Okay. Okay, um...Miss Quill, I’ve never done this before so forgive my inexperience. I lost my parents when I was young as well, and I never had the courage to seek out their resting place. People often describe me as brave, but when it comes to my family, I’ve never felt more cowardly in my life.”

“I wish I could have known you,” she continued. “Every story Peter tells, every song he plays, I feel your spirit, your soul. I’m not religious myself, and I don’t particularly believe in coincidence or fate, either, but I sense your presence when he speaks of you, like you’re still watching over him after all these years. I imagine you’re proud of the person he’s become, and I hope you approve of the company he keeps. Despite the way that some of the others grumble and groan about him, we’re a family, and we love each other all the same. Thank you for showing him love. So that he could show it to us...people who thought they’d lost any chance of it long ago.”

Yondu, meanwhile, sprinted after Peter - not an easy feat in the thick, powdery snow - and finally caught up to him, slightly out of breath. “You’re still a quick little devil, ain’t ya?”

“Watch the ‘devil’ talk, Yondu, we’re on religious grounds,” Peter said, chuckling half-heartedly. “I just need some air. I always get so down on myself whenever I think or talk about my mom. It’s never gonna change.”

“Sure, but...I actually wanted to talk to you about your grandpa.” Yondu stared down at his feet, unable to meet Peter’s curious gaze. “When the Ravagers picked you up to take you to Ego, I begged the cap’n to keep you, all ‘cos I wanted a friend. Never thought about all the family you left behind. All them aunties and uncles and cousins you didn’t talk much about.”

“Didn’t think much of ‘em,” Peter shrugged. “I was closest to Mom and Grandpa. Grandma was good people, too, but I didn’t see much of my mom’s brother, or his kids, or any of the third cousins once removed or whatever - ”

“Look, boy, I’m only sayin’ this ‘cos it’s a holiday and you seem to put a lot of investment into ‘em, but...I’m sorry I kept you from your family.” Yondu lifted his head high, tilting his chin up, clenching his jaw tightly. “I know I spent years going on and on about how the Ravagers were the best family you were ever gonna get, and I was dead wrong on two counts. The one you had before, and the one you got after.”

“Are you kidding? You saved me, dude,” Peter exclaimed, his face brightening. “If it wasn’t for you, I would’ve been delivered to my dad like I was s’posed to and turned into a Celestial battery! I guess I would’ve met Mantis a lot earlier, but other than that...believe me, I’m glad things turned out the way they did.”

“So you ain’t mad?” Yondu asked. Peter laughed, throwing his arm over Yondu’s shoulder and guiding him back to the others.

“Nah. I got plenty of other stuff to be mad at you about, but this isn’t one of ‘em.” ______

“We’ve returned with dinner,” Drax announced loudly through Peter and Gamora’s bedroom door; the couple down the hallway by the elevator shot him dirty looks, shushing him just as loudly in return.

“You could’ve just knocked,” Peter reminded him, swinging the door open and stepping aside to let him and Yondu in. “Man, that smells good.”

The Guardians were sat in a circle formation on the floor, armed with cutlery and plates from the hotel room’s kitchenette, chatting animatedly among themselves. It was Christmas Day, not to mention their last full day in St. Charles before flying back home, and after the general exhaustion of their minds and bodies throughout the week, they were sorely looking forward to it, even - and especially - Peter.

He absentmindedly watched Drax and Yondu pass out the styrofoam containers. No one had ordered anything particularly holiday-appropriate, mostly burgers and fries, generous heaps of pasta, and in Drax’s case, an enormous steak, but after the excess of Peter trying to cram every possible Christmas tradition into last year’s winter break, the reprieve was needed. “I am so hungry,” Mantis whined, stealing a fry from Nebula’s plate. Nebula immediately swatted her away without second thought.

“As if you didn’t inhale three giant waffles this morning,” Nebula said airily.

“You seem to be in a better mood today, boy,” Yondu commented, gesturing in Peter’s direction. “Bet it helps we weren’t runnin’ around like crazy.”

“I really gotta stop overthinkin’ the holidays,” Peter chuckled sheepishly. “I know we already said no gifts this year, but next year should be, like, nothing at all. Dinner, maybe.”

“I liked the snowball fight from last year,” Mantis volunteered.

“Same. I even built an ice cannon so I can pummel the rest of you losers,” Rocket snickered.

“Okay, so we can keep some of the small stuff, uh, minus the cannon. But I think all that matters is that we get to just...hang out. Spend time together that doesn’t involve school projects or chasing bad guys,” Peter said. “I mean, think about all the crazy stuff we did this year. Gamora and Nebula, you started your fight club - ”

“Combat lessons, Peter,” Gamora sighed.

“I know, but ‘fight club’ sounds a lot cooler,” Peter said, grinning. “And Rocket, you started your own side hustle with engineering tutorials.”

“And the only person who gets to see a single unit outta that is me,” Rocket said, rubbing his hands together gleefully. Groot grunted in protest. “Fine, kid, you too.”

“Can’t say I did much this year compared to some of you,” Yondu said, his smile tightening.

Gamora softened. “You worked really hard in school, Yondu, that’s not nothing. Fury said he’d never seen such a jump in GPA before, and you know he doesn’t say these things lightly.”

“He’s a spy, he lies for a livin’,” Yondu scoffed, but he looked pleased nonetheless. “We not gonna mention the time Drax saved all our asses from the Baluurian militia?”

“I am Groot,” Groot said approvingly, momentarily leaping to Drax’s shoulder so he could hug his cheek in appreciation. Drax smiled, patting him gently on the back.

“And Mantis, for her journey to self-discovery, an admirable endeavor,” Drax added. “Also, her newfound relationship with Nebula, while I do not personally understand your romantic compatibility - the same could be said of Quill and Gamora - ”

“Please stop,” Gamora said flatly. Nebula nodded in rare, unconditional agreement.

“ - it is a comfort to know that you have found happiness,” Drax finished.

“Thank you, Drax,” Mantis beamed. “I hope next year will be even better. We all feel much more...peaceful than we did last Christmas.”

“I like the sound of progress.” Gamora leaned a little further into Peter, smiling briefly when he put his arm around her, resting his hand on her hip. “We’re so close to finishing school and moving on - ”

“Movin’ on?” Rocket interrupted, furrowing his brow in suspicion.

“Or moving forward, if you would prefer,” Gamora said, correcting herself. “Terra can still be our home base if that’s what everyone wants. I just mean we won’t be students anymore, we’ll be full-time Guardians.”

“Kinda feels like we’re already full-time Guardians,” Peter admitted. “I mean, this is the first real vacation we’ve had since we met.”

“And we’ll have more, I’m sure,” Gamora promised. “But we have to work for them. It’s not about wanting breaks, it’s about deserving them. We can’t afford to be greedy about what our futures look like, we have to be realistic.”

Yondu groaned, slumping against Drax. “Just for once, girl, can you lighten up a little? It’s Christmas!”

“He has a point,” Peter said quietly, squeezing Gamora’s waist. When she looked up into his face, half-expecting him to look at her either pleadingly or teasingly, she was instead surprised to see...something she couldn’t quite identify. It was the sort of face he made when they fought, but not out of anger, more out of...worry, like he thought everything was about to change, and that he was powerless to do anything about it.

Regardless, Gamora was certain Peter didn’t want her to dissect his expression, nor did she want to in front of everyone else. Instead, she put her hand over his. “Okay,” she said simply.

“Okay, um, let’s get back to celebrating, then,” Peter said, his voice hollow. “And if we’re gonna celebrate, we gotta do it right.” He grabbed some cups and the carton of eggnog he’d stored in the room’s mini-fridge, pouring and passing it out to everyone else. He held up his glass. “To the Guardians. May we kick ass and take names for as long as we live!”

“I can drink to that, but I’m gonna need somethin’ stronger,” Rocket allowed, knocking back his drink like it was a shot.

“Don’t encourage Groot. You remember what happened the last time you left a bottle of whiskey lying around?” Gamora reminded him. Rocket shuddered; that one careless mistake had resulted in both the grossest and scariest night of his life. He never wanted to see Groot tucked up in a little bed, hooked up to ominously beeping machines, in the school’s infirmary ever again. “To persistence and patience. May we survive the rest of our education, so we can pursue our best future.��� Peter shivered.

“Yes, ma’am!” Yondu hooted, also drinking all of his in one go.

“And to family and love. May we have it in our lives forever,” Mantis finished shyly, turning to look at Nebula. Peter let out an audible “aww”, to which Gamora shushed him, when Nebula cracked a small smile in return.

After the others cleared out of their room and returned to their own, Peter and Gamora spent a good half hour doing the dishes together, chatting about all the things that had come up during dinner. Though he had never been one for chores - he could recall many a complaint he had for his mother whenever she told him to fold his laundry, insisting it was perfectly fine to just throw it into their respective drawers and call it a day - he enjoyed the domesticity of it when done by her side. It was like when he was a child, standing on a step stool so he could reach the counter, accepting every sudsy dish his mother handed him so he could run it under the faucet and rinse it off. That felt less like work, and more like time spent with his mom, precious minutes that he’d never have again. He wasn’t about to let moments with Gamora or the others slip away, not when history could repeat itself.

Gamora, on the other hand, watched Peter put the dishes back in the cabinet with a fond smile. Being the person she was, she knew that, at her core, she was still relatively young, still had many uncertainties laid out in front of her, years of her life she could never quite plan down to the minute, as much as she wanted to try. But - and maybe this was naive - she was certain that Peter was a certainty, that the Guardians were a certainty, and she never thought that some of her best memories would involve sitting on a floor and eating takeout with people so different from her, and yet, fundamentally the same.

She walked over to him then, a rush of affection stirring in her chest, and wrapped her arms around his middle, laying her head against his back. “Hey, you,” Peter said with a surprised laugh. “What’s up?”

“I’m still pretty awake,” she admitted. “Mind if we watch that movie you showed me last year...what was it?”

“A Charlie Brown Christmas it is,” he said, turning around to momentarily wrap her in his arms.

After changing into their comfiest sweatpants, the two of them laid out on their bed with Peter’s holo-tab projecting the movie onto the ceiling. Gamora found herself thinking back, once again, to what her Thanos-shadowed self would say if she saw her here, curled up on a king-size bed with silk sheets and goose-down pillows, the blustery Missouri snow blowing around outside like a strangely comforting soundtrack, watching a children’s cartoon with a person who loved nothing more than a good drink and a better song.

“I can hear you thinking,” Peter mumbled into her neck. “Wanna talk about it?”

“I spoke to your mother after you had to take a break from her grave.” She felt him tense up beside her. “I didn’t know what to say, exactly, but I mentioned how I was still afraid of seeking my parents’ resting place. And that, even though I’m don’t usually believe in cosmic forces, I can feel her presence sometimes. I didn’t mention that I can’t feel theirs.”

“Is it a guilt thing?” he asked quietly. “I mean, you don’t talk about them much, and I talk about Mom all the time. I don’t think it’s a bad omen or anything.”

“Maybe,” she said, reaching to take his hand, tangling their fingers together. “Or luck. That I’m lucky to have survived and escaped Thanos, to have found all of you, to live this life that I’m living now. Meanwhile, our parents’ lives were cut so terribly short. Neither of us had any part in it, so I wouldn’t call it guilt, exactly. Just a tragedy that we have the privilege and the burden of carrying with us.”

Peter turned over so their faces were closer, his free hand resting on her waist comfortingly. “We don’t have to carry it with us forever,” he murmured. “I mean, I know I sound like a big ol’ hypocrite since I’m the one who won’t shut up about his mom, but I think it’s okay to just be, y’know, thankful for who they were and what we had with them. And not just at the holidays, but year-round. ‘Cos honestly, I don’t wanna come back here next year. It helps a little to talk to her, I guess, but all it does is remind me of all the things we never got to do. I wanna remember what we did.”

“Less of a spectacle next year, then?” Gamora’s voice grew stronger, returning to her usual fond, teasing tone she used for Peter exclusively, and only whenever they were alone. “I’ll enjoy the peace and quiet.”

“With our friends? Never,” he smirked, leaning down to kiss her briefly. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders, pulling him in closer. Though she could clearly picture all the chaos that Peter was imagining with annoying accuracy, she still knew that every insecurity and every worriment would always linger in her brain, that no single conversation would solve all her problems, but for now, at least, her mind was pleasantly quiet. ______

The Guardians piled themselves into their rental car outside the hotel for the last time, once again jammed uncomfortably against one another, ready to leave for the private airfield so they could be reunited with the Milano and head home. “No one left anything behind?” Gamora asked, glancing at them through the rearview mirror.

“You made us check the rooms a hundr’d times,” Yondu grumbled. “Then we had to make them beds all over again!”

“We can’t leave everything turned upside down just because they have housekeeping,” Gamora replied dismissively. “The reality is, Yondu, that they judge us for everything we say and do. You’ve seen the kind of press coverage we get when a job goes poorly. We can’t afford to let them think that about us; we have to control what they think.”

“Well, I think you think too much,” Yondu said childishly, shrinking in his seat a little.

Gamora rolled her eyes, knowing better than to drag the conversation out. “Peter had one last stop he wanted to make before we head to the airfield, by the way.”

“Really? What is it?” Mantis asked curiously, leaning over from the backseat to look at Peter (he’d firmly secured the passenger seat after the debacle of being shoved in the back when they’d first arrived).

Peter smiled. “My house.”

Soon enough, the car pulled up to the sidewalk on the opposite side of the street. It was a neat, trim little house which was deceptively more worn than it first appeared. Like many others surrounding it, the house was older, more historic than some of the sprawling mansions seen in the more distant parts of town, with off-white siding stained with weather and wear, and a stone fence running around its perimeter that had seen better days. There was a covered porch that wrapped around one side to the back, boasting a hanging bench and a rusted glass side table. The one thing that stood out to Peter, however, was when he looked up at the second-floor window, the window to his bedroom, and saw the familiar curtains still hanging there, stood utterly still.

“It looks...the same,” he breathed. “You’re tellin’ me no one’s lived here since Mom died?”

“That seems unlikely, and yet...it really does look that way, doesn’t it?” Gamora practically pressed her face up against her window. “Like nothing’s been touched.”

“But...no, Grandpa would’ve sold it, or the banks would’ve come after it...that don’t make any sense.” Peter leaned back against his door, frustrated.

“Quill,” Drax said quietly. “Do you think there is a chance your family did not sell the house?”

“Only one way to find out, I guess.” Peter pulled his phone from his pocket, and, with a deep breath, did one of the few things he truly dreaded, something he told himself to never do - he searched for his family name.

His first results were expectedly non-specific; there were dozens of people with the same name as his grandfather that ended up in the news for one reason or another, but after he added the city name, it was narrowed down to a few helpful articles. From there, it didn’t take him long to find the one he was looking for, and he began to read it out loud, his voice trembling from the very start.

When an unexpected tragedy hit the Quill family in St. Charles, Missouri, Henry Quill, 62, struggled to hold everyone together while they coped with their terrible loss. His daughter, Meredith Quill, 31, passed away of brain cancer last month, surrounded by her family. Meredith’s son, Peter, who was 8 at the time, was overwhelmed, unable to process what had happened, and ran out of her hospital room, never to be seen again. Quill and his remaining family, including his wife and son, were left to plan both a funeral and a search party. They haven’t given up hope for Peter’s return yet, but they’re grimly aware of the possibility that he won’t come back.

“Peter was just like my Meredith. He could be quiet sometimes, but you get a little song and dance going and suddenly, he’s the brightest light in the room,” Quill said in a telephone interview on Saturday. “There was nothing he loved more than his mother, and the fact is, I was so caught up in the sound of my daughter’s last breath that I lost sight of him - and I’ll never stop blaming myself.”

Since the loss of his daughter and grandson, Quill made the decision to purchase and maintain their home (Meredith was a single mother) in the hopes that it will bring Peter back. Though costly, he believes it to be the “beacon Peter needs to come home”, and is determined to keep it in the family “until the day he dies”. He has sworn to visit the property at least twice a month to mop and dust the furniture, wash the bedding, and mow the lawn, enlisting his son and extended family to help out.

“Does that mean…” Peter let out a sob of disbelief. “He’s still around?”

“Oh, Peter,” Mantis said brightly, reaching around the seat to hug him. “I think you are right!”

“Should we stay another day so you can look for him?” Gamora suggested, her mind already racing with possibilities.

“No, I...I can’t.” Peter shook his head adamantly. “I’m not...ready. It already took a lot of guts for me to come back here last year, took a lot for me to come back again. I’m gonna need to think on this before I set myself up for disappointment.”

“That’s very rational of you,” Gamora said, reaching over to cup his cheek, using her thumb to wipe at the tear that had slipped from his eyes, one that he didn’t even realize was there. It was a testament to Peter’s emotional state that Rocket didn’t make yet another exaggerated kissy noise at them, as he was oft to do. “So what do you want to do now?”

Peter placed his hand over hers, smiling at the Guardians, who (nearly) all had returning, encouraging grins of their own. “Let’s go home.” ______

Despite all the tinkering and whatnot the team (mostly Rocket) had been doing on the Milano over the years, it was still, modestly put, a piece of junk. It was the last evening before the spring semester started, but everything was still covered in a thick sheet of snow, leaving their ship especially creaky and stiff, meaning they had to cancel their future jobs until the weather thawed out. It also meant that their living space, which Peter and Rocket had refurbished in their first year together to make it a more habitable, Groot-accessible area, was freezing, and to top it all off, their fireplace was refusing to work.

“I almost want to go to the student lounge, just for indoor heating,” Nebula grumbled.

“And be around other people? That does not sound like you,” Mantis teased, joining her on the couch with a thick blanket and two mugs of hot cocoa. She held one out to Nebula, who immediately snatched it up like she hadn’t had anything to drink in days, lifting her arms in compliance when Mantis threw the blanket over them both. “Here, let me warm you up.”

“Fine.” Nebula maneuvered herself a little so Mantis could tuck into her side. “I doubt this will work. Your body temperature is comparatively lower.”

“So romantic,” Mantis sighed, brushing a sticky kiss onto Nebula’s cheek before popping another mini-marshmallow into her mouth.

“You didn’t choose me for saccharine compliments and embarrassing public displays of affection,” Nebula countered.

“You are very right,” Mantis said, smiling. “I will do all of that for us.”

“Lucky me.” Though Nebula’s voice was monotonous as ever, there was a hint of a smile on her face.

“So...do you feel better, now that we are back home?” Mantis asked, shuffling closer.

“I would feel ‘better’ if we didn’t have classes tomorrow. But this ship, as awful as it is, doesn’t irritate me as much as the hotel.” Nebula shuddered involuntarily. “I loathe beds where I feel like I could fall right through to the floor. And people that smile too much.”

“No wonder you never sleep in the dorms. Or maybe you have other reasons?” Mantis grinned suggestively, a very odd look on her otherwise innocent face, and leaned in to kiss her, pleased by the way Nebula melted right into it. They were then interrupted by a very loud shutter click. “PETER!”

“Dammit, I still don’t know how to use this thing,” Peter groaned, setting aside the half-broken DSLR camera he and Rocket had found during a junking expedition on Knowhere a few months ago. “You girls need refills?”

“If you take one more picture of us, I will rip off your nose and dunk it in my mug, Quill,” Nebula spat.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Peter chirped, taking their cups and disappearing into the kitchen.

Gamora entered the room next, carrying a book in hand and Groot on her shoulder, and sat down in the big armchair across from them. She opened her book to where she’d left off and began to read, trying not to glance over at Mantis and Nebula still snuggled up together so she wouldn’t start unashamedly grinning like a lunatic.

Even though it’d been months by now, she still wasn’t sure how they worked out so well, and yet they did, with Nebula slowly opening herself up to conversation and affection, bit by bit. Gamora supposed the same could be said of herself over a year ago, when she and Peter were still pretending that they were only pretending, when she told herself, unconvincingly, that she didn’t think they would work. She almost left the team to pursue Thanos, and now, she couldn’t imagine a world in which she wasn’t here, sitting in the ice-cold living space of their barely-functioning ship, among her family.

Groot snuggled against her torso, sighing happily as if he could he hear her thoughts. “I am Groot,” he murmured.

“I think so, too,” she replied.

The rest of the team joined them around the time of Peter’s return, prompting him to get more piping hot mugs of cocoa for everyone. Rocket attempted tinkering with the fireplace one last time to no avail, and dissolved into his usual moody grumbles until Peter gave him more marshmallows. Mantis moved to sit on the floor by Nebula’s head so she could join Drax and Yondu in playing one of Peter’s old video games, both her antennae and her face glowing with pure joy when Nebula turned over to awkwardly rest her chin on top of Mantis’s head (“Don’t mistake my intent, I can see the screen better this way,” she claimed, but no one believed her).

Peter sat on the armrest of Gamora’s chair, draping an arm around her shoulders so he could pass her the last cup. “This feels more like Christmas to me. Freezing our asses off and doin’ absolutely nothing at all.”

“I didn’t mind visiting your hometown again, but I agree, though I wish it wasn’t at the expense of the Milano’s heating system,” Gamora said dryly. “Do you really mean it, though? That you won’t be doing much for next year?”

“I think it’s time we start coming up with traditions of our own,” Peter shrugged. “There’s eight of us, we’re bound to have some awesome ideas. Don’t have to be the traditional, y’know, decorated tree, cookies and eggnog, gift-giving stuff.”

“If you’re sure. I like the sound of that, actually,” she said, patting his leg affectionately. “But Peter...promise me you won’t forget to contact your grandfather.”

“It’s on my to-do list...which is just in my brain, but still,” he relented, chuckling. “I’ve been busy prepping the ship for jobs and myself for next semester, I almost forgot. There’s still so much... stuff ahead of us.”

“Back when I mentioned ‘our futures’...it terrified you, didn’t it.” It didn’t sound like much of a question.

“I think the idea of everything we have right now goin’ away or gettin’ bigger than anything we can possibly handle would scare just about anyone. But...at least we know we ain’t going at it alone.” Peter smiled. “Speaking of alone, we still got another sixteen hours before class starts again, and I wanna spend ‘em right. I also think I’d rather be freezin’ outside rather than inside, ‘cos at least there’s snow. Anyone else with me?”

Mantis, unsurprisingly, was the first one to leap to her feet, running to grab her coat and gloves; the others briefly looked at each other, shrugged, and followed suit. Even Nebula sat up on the couch so she could re-lace her boots. Everyone else practically dashed out the door, with Yondu and Rocket in particular letting out triumphant shouts as they were promptly blasted in the face with cold air. Meanwhile, Gamora went to sit beside her sister, her eyes shining. “It’s good to see you like this, Nebula.”

“Oh, don’t start,” Nebula groaned. “Can I not begrudgingly participate in asinine activities without a tearful speech about my ‘changed ways’? Or must you always treat me like a child taking her first steps just because I appear ‘happy’?”

“You say that as if you aren’t actually enjoying yourself,” Gamora teased, the two of them getting up to pull on their gloves and coats. “Don’t worry, I’ll spare you the monologue this time. I think I’ve expressed enough sisterly pride to exhaust the both of us, at least, for now. Let’s go catch up with our friends.” She held out her hand expectantly. Nebula paused, staring at it like it was going to spontaneously catch on fire, then reached out to accept it, allowing her sister to lead her out into the snow.

a/n: Happy holidays, y'all! I know it's been a year since the last 20q fic, and I did attempt to do both a Valentine's and a summer-themed fic for this 'verse, but I honestly couldn't figure out a plot that I really liked and wanted to write about. Writing this one, however, was super fun, and gave me a few more ideas I might want to explore in the future!

The song they danced to was All You Need Is Love by the Beatles, which made me realize I need to use more Beatles songs (my next AU is named after a Beatles song, but still). Thanks so much for reading, likes and reblogs would be much appreciated, and I hope you enjoyed :)

[zenosanalytic]

Solo Bouno

So I saw Solo on Tuesday and it’s a Good movie; not great, didn’t make a Huge impression on me, but Fun and Enjoyable and certainly something I’d happily watch once it makes it to cable, with a few quibbles.

The Good:

The acting was (mostly)good

The characters were well-written

The Dialogue was fun, funny, and unforced

While the Plot had Issues, it flowed well and felt natural, and there was nothing really eye-rolling in it.

All the technical aspects -Design, Cinematography, sound work, editing- were Proficient

Establishes the stakes quickly and effectively

Chewie is Great

Lando is Great

L3-37(yes, they REALLY named the robot l33t) is Great

The Quibbles:

It was a VERY Generic origin story

They didn’t set up themes they needed to, and didn’t really deliver a good payoff on the themes they did set up

Related to this, there are important character beats and payoffs that are never really setup(or “Planted”).

It could have done better with its female cast. I’ll get into this a bit more under spoilers

Alden Ehrenreich NEVER STOPS SMILING! I mean, that’s an exaggeration obvsl, but it was REALLY noticeable to me. IDK if this is an artifact of the editing, the directing, or Ehrenreich’s choices about the character(tbf, Han is BSing people A LOT in this film, and the smile was Ford’s BSing expression so...), and it wasn’t really grating or anything but, by the end, it did take me out of the story a bit.

Glover does Williams’ accent for Lando a few times and, while it isn’t bad, I liked his take on the character better without it.

The writing doesn’t really do enough to sell the second job and, while all the action which constitutes it is Fine, I kinda grumbled at how thin and absolutely not convincing that bit was.

Ok I think that’s it. On to my lengthier Spoiler-Quibbles:

Solo falls into the common prequel/origin story trap of trying to explain everything about a character. This is always a bad idea but, with this movie and this cast, it is a particularly Horrible idea. Han, Chewie, and Lando are the perfect sorts of characters for a series of matinee-type adventure movies -think Indiana Jones- and Solo, by shoving his whole backstory into one film and leaving him practically where we find him in Star Wars, really, really, really, makes that unlikely. An added negative of that is it takes what the OS establishes as years -maybe decades- old relationships between Han, Chewie, and Lando and turns them into a one-job acquaintance. That was a Very Bad Idea.

Han starts off speaking Wookie(albeit badly), and I feel like that choice leaves a lot of potential comedy&bonding on the table.

They really misuse Thandie Newton and her character, Val. She dies practically as soon as she’s introduced, and in a way that doesn’t feel honest to the character or situation. If they’d just put the bombs on a timer rather than a detonator this would have been less bad

This is compounded by how little mourning and upset Beckett, her lover and longtime partner, is allowed to displayed over her death(oh, and the deaths of his entire crew. Oh, and the loss of the future they’d planned together).

Half of Beckett’s initial crew disappears between scenes, and this is never explained. It really isn’t a big deal and I didn’t even realize it until thinking about the movie just now, but it seems like kind of a significant continuity error. Maybe they die, and I’m just not remembering it?

This actually could have worked, though, if the movie were a bit more willing to invest in characters other than Han. Later in the movie Beckett betrays Han over what to do with the Hyperfuel they’ve stolen. If he’d been shown as really angry and upset over these deaths, or if he’d been shown to be the sort willing to sacrifice lives for the score, then all of this stuff could have tied into a really neat ambiguous antihero narrative for him. Unfortunately, he’s consistently shown to be sentimental, friendly, even fatherly. He only gets visibly angry at Han once and only for an instant; isn’t angry at the Cloud Riders at all, even though they’re responsible for the deaths of Val and Rio; and only once comes even close to suggesting a score matters more than their lives, and only does that right after Val and Rio’s deaths. As a result, his betrayal feels detached from the character we’ve known up to that point. And what’s his motivation? The life he planned to live once his debts were cleared is gone and, by stealing the Hyperfuel for himself at the end, he’s guaranteed to live under a bounty for the rest of his life. It just doesn’t fit.

The same arc-confusion plagues Clarke’s Qi’ra. She also betrays Han in the end -maybe out of a desire to protect him, maybe out of pragmatism, but most likely from ambition- but the conflict her choice is a solution to is never established. It’s never established that she might be using Han and he’s unwilling to see it. They suggest Qi’ra is morally different from the person Han knew as a kid with(I think?) one passing line of dialogue, but the film doesn’t show anything that’d convince the audience she is, and shows lots of things(like her attempts to hide her brand from Han) which suggest she regrets her current life and wants out, not deeper in. Her making the choice she does thinking it was the best way to protect them both would make sense with the character on the screen(though, given that Han is Beckett’s only living accomplice by the end, it seems more like he’d catch the blame for it too, particularly once Beckett’s dead), but the movie presents it as a power-grab.

There’s a lot of stuff in here that’s either changes to, or taken from, the EU. References like this can be fun, but they’re always a gamble since you’re relying on information from outside the movie which the audience might not be aware of, and thus be confused and annoyed by. The Wookies have, apparently, been forced off their homeworld and enslaved en masse. Darth Maul’s not dead, but rather the head of the Syndicate Qi’ra (literally)belongs to(they even have him pull out the double-headed lightsaber and brandish it while he’s holoing her at the end so people will realize who he is; it’s ridiculous). The Cloud Riders who interrupted their first attempt to steal Hyperfuel turn out to be working with the Rebellion. The last one’s not a HUGE deal, but the others I thought were pretty odd choices.

They give Han a (very generic)rough backstory, but then present him as just a totally unambiguous, noncynical, non-gritty, good guy and softboy. Which, yes, he should have a heart of gold absolutely, but without ambiguity there’s no tension; no concern over what sort of choice he’s going to make. The whole “Rogue with a Heart of Gold” dynamic only works, narratively, when the character is both a Rogue, and kind-hearted to people hanging by a thread. This Solo isn’t really a Rogue; hell, he doesn’t even cheat at poker!

Miscellaneous Spoilers:

They kill off L3 ~halfway through the movie, and I’m ambivalent about it. She dies cheering on an enslaved rebellion she unwittingly started, which fits the character, but I think it would have been more fitting if she’d set it off intentionally, and if she’d died in a more active way; she is shooting at the slavers earlier in that sequence, but during the scene where she’s shot she’s cheering the rebels with her back turned to the danger and gets blind-sided. I mean, just having her get iced while shouting advice, or while looking back to Lando while still fighting, would have been much better. Also, while I didn’t think it was manpainy(Lando is justifiably and visibly upset about it, but that doesn’t become the focus of her death), they do then later strip her harddrive to merge it with the Falcon’s navigation computer, and that sort of direct utilizing of a female-coded character’s death and body to advance the (male-protags’)story didn’t sit right with me in the theater. It’s not handled really terribly or anything, in fact they do it in crisis as a sort of last-resort, but I still kinda |:T’d at it.

Lando has A LOT of capes, and it is Wonderful uwu Also he is an author and possible vlogger, which is Also Wonderful uwu uwu

Erin Kellyman as Enfys Nest has a small but important part, and she makes a big impression with it. We have the whole movie to get to know Han(on top of already liking him from the previous films) and I still found myself more interested in her story and her crew when they revealed their true nature at the end, than with New!Han(who wasn’t really even that bad; I know I’m ragging on Ehrenreich but he did alright with what had to have been an intimidating part). I guess this is also an excellent example of how important Mystique --NOT explaining things; leaving them vague-- can be to character-charisma.

That’s everything I can think of right now. Don’t be fooled by the length of that quibblelist though; it’s absolutely a fun movie and, if you like Star Wars and the Star Wars setting and, if the price of a ticket won’t hurt your wallet, it’s definitely worth seeing. A Fun, Funny, Entertaining, Summer Movie, and a good way to spend an afternoon.

P.S.: Plus, for the more politically minded and spiteful among us(read: Me), it’ll piss off legions of entitled manbabies online who want to get Kathleen Kennedy fired for having the temerity to be a woman while running Star Wars.

[livingcorner]

How to make an easy raised garden bed for your vegetables

After almost 20 years of growing my own food and designing gardens, I passionately believe that growing vegetables in raised garden beds is the best route for most gardeners.

You're reading: How to make an easy raised garden bed for your vegetables

In this style of gardening, you work to establish permanent beds and paths in your garden. This is in contrast to the flat or farm style of gardening, in which you till up a large square or rectangle in your yard and start planting.

When you design your garden to include raised garden beds and established paths, you’ll find that the benefits far outweigh the drawbacks. Let’s explore the pros and cons and learn how to make easy raised garden beds.

Benefits & Drawbacks of Raised Garden Beds

Less work in spring. When you have a permanent garden design, you don’t have to start over from scratch every year. In contrast, when you grow food in the flat style, every spring you have to wait until the soil dries out, get out your tiller, and then lay out your planting beds again.

With a raised garden bed there’s not much prep you need to do to start planting in spring. If you cleared out and mulched your garden in fall, all you have to do is wait for the soil to warm up, and then walk out and start planting.

There’s no wrestling with machinery, digging or flipping over soil, or really any backbreaking work at all!

Better for your soil health. Having a permanent garden design means it’s very clear where your beds and paths are located. That encourages you to stay on the paths when walking and working, and you’ll be less likely to step into the garden beds.

Walking and stepping on the soil you’re growing food in will compact it over the long term. Keeping yourself in permanent aisles will help maintain loose soil, which will make it easier to plant seeds and plants, remove weeds, and provide space and air for your plants’ roots to grow.

You can also concentrate fertility on those garden beds by consistently adding mulch, compost, cover crop, organic fertilizer, and manure to increase the nutrients available to your plants.

In almost 20 years of gardening, I’ve never tilled my soil and you shouldn’t either. Read more about why I discourage it here.

Less maintenance over the long term. One of the great things about having permanent beds and paths is you can easily keep the beds and paths mulched all year round, which will go a long way towards reducing the amount of weeds that grow.

And that means many less hours you need to spend weeding in your garden. We’ll talk more about mulch later in the post, and you can read my passionate plea to keep your soil covered in this post.

Creates a more attractive garden. Permanent raised garden beds create organization and structure in your garden. These are not bad things to have in a vegetable garden because they lend to the overall attractiveness of your garden.

I like to think of the raised garden beds as the canvas. Once they’re constructed, you can take that blank canvas and use the vegetable plants and flowers to “paint” on it to create beautiful and interesting combinations of colors, textures, and heights.

Two common complaints about vegetable gardens are that they’re ugly and it takes a lot of work to grow your own food.

I can guarantee that taking the time to build several easy raised garden beds this season will drastically reduce your labor each year, and create a healthier and more beautiful garden.

In this blog post I’m going to walk you through the process I used to build my current garden from scratch the year  we purchased the house and moved in.

I’ll show you three different options for creating easy raised garden beds, discuss the pros and cons of each style, and share the supplies you’ll need.

Let’s get started!

Things to Think About Before You Begin

Before you start building your raised beds, there are some site assessments that should be taken to make sure you’re planning to put your garden in the right place.

Sun You should be putting your garden in the sunniest possible place on your property. Although you can grow vegetables in partial sun, all vegetables do best in full sun.

Ideally, your garden will get at least 8 hours of sun in the height of summer. And more is better unless you live in an extremely hot or southern climate where vegetables can struggle in the full summer sun. Only then you would benefit from some shade.

Soil Sun exposure and soil health are the two most important factors in the success of your garden. There is a complex web of life that lives under the soil surface, along with the nutrients your plants need to grow and flourish.

A soil test is an easy way to get a fuller picture of what exactly lies beneath your grass. For most soil tests you’ll collect samples from various locations in your yard and send them away to a local lab to be analyzed.

Within a few weeks, they’ll mail or email you the results.

Most soil tests measure the levels of nitrogen, potassium, phosphorus, organic matter and soil pH. They’ll also give you recommendations on what to add to your soil based on the results of your test.

The best place to get a soil test done is through your local Cooperative Extension office. They’ll have a printable form to fill out with an explanation of how to collect your soil sample.

If you live in Wisconsin you can find information about soil testing at this website.

If you live in an older house where lead paint was used on the exterior or have concerns that you may have heavy metals in your soil (you live near a manufacturing plant, or on an old site of a gas station, auto repair shop, landfill or dry cleaners) it is imperative that you get your soil tested.

You should be able to add on a test for lead and heavy metals to the regular nutrient soil test.  

Size Keep in mind that gardening requires an investment of time and work. It’s joyful and fun work, but it’s still a commitment all the same. Think about how much time you really want to spend in your garden each week.

The smaller the garden, the less time you’ll have to spend in it.

Start small! That’s my advice to most new gardeners. It is better to have a small garden that’s manageable than one that gets out of control during the season.

If you have fun and feel successful you are much more likely to continue gardening year after year. Once you build your skills and get a handle on your smaller garden you can always add on to create a larger garden in the years to come.

If you’re new to gardening, I’d suggest starting with two or three raised garden beds.  This should be enough space to give you a real taste of gardening and what things you enjoy growing, but not too big that you’ll become overwhelmed.

Keep in mind while you’re reading this post that I’ve been gardening for almost 20 years. And it’s been my job for many of those years.

As you’ll see, the garden I built at my house is about 1600 square feet with 19 different raised beds.

This is a size I’d only recommend if you have many years of gardening under your belt.

Even if you think you might want a garden this big in the future, I still suggest starting small and expanding your garden over the years as you start to master all of the details and techniques involved growing your own food.

Location When you’re deciding where on your property to locate your new garden, putting it as close to your house as possible is the best option. Sticking your garden in the back corner of your yard is not advisable.

If you’re not walking by your garden every day you’ll have the tendency to forget about it. That’s not good!

Plus, if you focus on creating a beautiful garden, having it close to your house is going to bring an added layer of joy to your life because you’ll be able to see if from your deck, patio, or windows in your house.

You’ll be interacting with it a lot more, which makes the work all the more worth it.

Another location consideration, besides choosing the sunniest spot closest to your house, installing your garden on the most level spot in your yard. This will make installation much more simple and straightforward.

3 Options for Building Easy Raised Garden Beds

I’m a minimalist when it comes to gardening, so I don’t like anything that’s too complicated or feels like a lot of unnecessary work. That’s why I’m sharing three simple designs for easy raised garden beds for your home vegetable garden.

As you’ll see in this post, I built all three styles in my own garden the year I purchased my house.

Easy Raised Garden Bed Option #1: Wood Raised Beds

Wood raised beds are most commonly built out of dimensional lumber you find at your local home improvement store. They’re not necessarily the easiest beds to build, but they are straightforward.

The pros of wood raised beds are:

Height: You can build the bed as high as you’d like, so if you have physical limitations they might be easier on your body.

Longevity: As long as you buy rot-resistant wood they should last a long time and won’t require much maintenance.

Shape: I think the limited shape options can be a benefit. A garden filled with rectangular beds all the same size can be a beautifully organized garden.

The cons of wood raised beds are:

Cost: The upfront cost involved in purchasing supplies can be a hardship if you don’t have a big budget.

Shape: If you’re not skilled at carpentry, you’ll probably need to stick to creating rectangular or square beds in your garden. Fancy shapes will be too advanced!

If you prefer more organic shapes in your garden, the linear nature of these beds probably aren’t for you. But, stay tuned for more options!

Design & Supplies Needed

Size options: The most common sizes of wood raised beds are 4 feet wide and then various lengths between 4 feet long and 10 feet long. You don’t have to stick all to one size if you don’t want to. The raised beds in my garden vary in size.

Sometimes I wish all of my beds were the same size for ease of rotation and calculating how much I can plant in each bed, but I also like the variety and options different sized beds provide me.

Height: Remember that the taller your beds the more soil you’ll need to purchase to fill them. I suggest building them between 6 inches and 1 foot tall unless you have physical limitations that would benefit from taller beds.

I gathered several suggestions from reputable companies in my Amazon storefront here. You can read more about organic fertilizer and what you should look for when selecting one to purchase in this article.

Read more: 10 essential tools every gardener needs

Wood: If you have the budget, you’ll want to purchase the most rot-resistant wood possible so your garden beds last a long time. In my garden, some of my beds are made from black locust (difficult to find) and the rest are constructed of cedar, which is much more common.

Soil: Once you settle on bed size and length, you can use this soil calculator to figure out how much soil you’ll need to order to create your beds. Make sure you’re ordering a mix that’s appropriate for growing food. I like mixes that are 1/2 compost and 1/2 topsoil.

Organic fertilizer: I recommend adding a balanced organic fertilizer to all of your new garden beds before planting. I’ve had mixed experiences with soil I’ve ordered for my garden. Often it’s lacking the nutrients vegetable plants need to grow.

I gathered several suggestions from reputable companies in my Amazon storefront here. You can read more about organic fertilizer and what you should look for when selecting one to purchase in this article.

Mulch for garden paths: I use a thick layer of woodchips for all of my garden paths because they last a long time. I usually add a new layer once a year in spring. You can really use whatever material you want for your paths, stones, gravel, pavers, bricks, and more.

Again, being married to an arborist has its advantages, including an unlimited supply of woodchips. If you have a tree pruning or removal scheduled for your property, ask the tree care company to leave behind the woodchips.

There’s also a website called Chip Drop where you can sign up to receive free woodchips from local tree care companies.

Woodchips can be expensive to buy when you need large quantities and this will be an expense you’ll need to expect every spring.

Mulch for garden beds: You don’t want to use woodchips on your garden beds as mulch. They’re very carbonaceous, so often when they get mixed into the soil they steal nitrogen from the surrounding plants to aid them in breaking down. Vegetable plants need a lot of nitrogen, so this could affect their health.

Instead, opt for straw, hay, leaves, grass clippings or other organic matter. You can read more about mulching your garden in this post.

Construction: There are so many complicated plans online for creating wooden raised beds. It doesn’t have to be that difficult!

Depending on how high I want my beds, I use one or two 2″ x 6″ boards on the sides and ends, and then a small 2″ x 2″ piece in each corner.

If it’s a long bed, like 10 ft., I might tack another 2″ x 2″ piece (or 2″ x 4″) in the middle of the long sides to pin the boards together.

You can see the design I use in the photo below.

I also built the bed below for a client one season. It’s only one 2″ x 6″ board high. She didn’t need the extra height.

Now for some pictures of me and my husband installing the first raised beds of our current garden.

The overgrown shrub filled front yard before clearing it out. You can’t even see the house.

There were overgrown shrubs taking over the sunniest part of the lot. You couldn’t even see the house from the street. We cut most of them down and turned them into woodchips with my husband’s chipper.

He’s been an arborist for over 15 years and this is the first time I got to learn how to use the chipper and be the ground gal.

Me feeding the chipper.Same shot at the first one above. You can see the house now that all the shrubs are gone!

I had a bunch of random raised beds leftover from selling them one year through my business. Once we sorted out the sizes and put them together we laid them out into a design.

My goal was to design the garden on paper first, but we didn’t have time. So this first phase was a design on the fly!

If you’re more of a planner, you can plot out your design on graph paper or right in the garden with stakes and twine using this method.

Here’s an example of how I used stakes and twine to lay out a garden design for a client.

Laying out the design.

The next step was to level and fill the beds. I don’t recommend installing your beds right on the grass.

It will be an absolute pain to mow and the grass sometimes moves into the space between the bed and the soil in the bed. Then you’ll never get rid of it.

Our installation area was mostly bare soil left after the shrubs were removed, so we were able to install right onto a clean slate. Where there was a bit of grass we dug it out only at the spot where the beds touch the ground.

The areas in and around the beds got a layer of cardboard to smother the grass. It breaks down throughout the season.

We leveled, filled and then mulched each bed with marsh hay. Then we covered the areas around the beds with cardboard and eventually woodchips.

We also installed a bermed perennial garden between the street and the vegetable garden for a visual buffer and a way to add some additional texture and color to our front yard.

We simply layered cardboard over the grass, made a berm with the soil we ordered, and planted perennials we brought over from our old house.

I planted the vegetables right after the installation of the beds since it was already early June. We continued to lay down cardboard and woodchips over all the grass areas we wanted to kill.

The grass will be smothered under all that mass. Much easier than sod stripping!

Later that summer I ended up adding three more raised beds to expand the garden on the right of the above photo for a total of seven wood raised beds. Two beds are 4 ft. x 6 ft., four beds are 4 ft. x 8 ft. and one bed is 4 ft. x 10 ft.

Six years later all of the beds are still looking great and I haven’t had to repair or replace any of them.

Removing the Grass for Installation

It’s likely you won’t be installing your garden on a flat site with bare soil like I did. Most of the time there’s grass where you’ll want to create a garden.

If you don’t have a flat site, the presence of grass can make it difficult to level your beds. But, it’s not necessary to remove all of the grass, just some small portions to give you more wiggle room in leveling.

If you have the ability to plan ahead, you can cover the entire footprint of your future garden with something that doesn’t let light through to kill the grass – tarp, black plastic, old billboard, etc.

If you’re installing over grass, one trick I’ve learned is to simply remove the grass where the bed is going to lay on the ground. I do this using a manual sod stripper I rent from a local hardware store.

In my post about raspberries, I talk more about how to use it and link to a video about it.

In the below photo you can see that I’ve only removed the grass in the footprint of the bed so I can dig in the soil to help me level it.

This may not be necessary if you’re not picky about how level your beds are. After I installed my current raised beds a neighbor who works as an engineer stopped by and complimented me on my precision!

After I removed the sod I threw it in the center of the bed and later covered it with about a foot of soil.

Okay, I think that’s all you need to know for easy raised bed option numero uno. Leave a comment below this post if you have additional questions.

Easy Raised Garden Bed Option #2: Mounded Beds

Mounded beds are garden beds that are formed using your existing or imported soil so the bed rises above the surrounding paths, but there’s no wood frame. It’s like a wooden raised bed without the wood!

The pros of mounded raised beds are:

Quick: These beds don’t require lumber, tools, or building skills. You can easily construct several in an afternoon work session.

Inexpensive: There is an option of not buying any additional soil, although you’ll have to plan ahead. If you end up building them over the existing grass, you’ll only have to purchase soil and organic fertilizer.

Longevity: Because you’re not using any wood in their construction, these beds will last indefinitely. There’s nothing to rot or replace over the years.

Shape: You can create mounded beds in lots of different shapes and sizes and even add curves to make them more interesting. These would be a good choice if you’re turned off by the linear nature of wooden raised beds.

The drawback of mounded beds are:

Form: Because they don’t have wood reinforcements keeping the soil in place, mounded beds tend to slump and spread out a bit over time, losing their initial form. They may need to be reshaped periodically to get them back into their original footprint.

Design & Supplies Needed

Size options: Similar to the wooden raised bed, you want your mounded beds to be 4 ft. wide or less. Anything wider starts to make it difficult to reach into the middle of the bed. You’re less restricted by length with these beds, so you can make them as long as you want.

Height: The taller your beds the more soil you’ll need to purchase to fill them. I suggest building them between 4-8 inches tall.

Soil: Once you settle on bed size and length, you can use this soil calculator to figure out how much soil you’ll need to order to create your beds. Make sure you’re ordering a soil mix that’s appropriate for growing food. I like garden mixes that are 1/2 compost and 1/2 topsoil.

Organic fertilizer: I recommend adding a balanced organic fertilizer to all of your new garden beds before planting. I’ve had mixed experiences with soil I’ve ordered for my garden. Often it’s lacking the nutrients vegetable plants need to grow.

I gathered several suggestions from reputable companies in my Amazon storefront here. You can read more about organic fertilizer and what you should look for when selecting one to purchase in this article.

Mulch for garden paths: I use a thick layer of woodchips for all of my garden paths because they last a long time. I usually add a new layer once a year in spring. You can really use whatever material you want for your paths, stones, gravel, pavers, bricks, and more.

Again, being married to an arborist has its advantages, including an unlimited supply of woodchips. If you have a tree pruning or removal scheduled for your property, ask the tree care company to leave behind the woodchips.

There’s also a website called Chip Drop where you can sign up to receive free woodchips from local tree care companies.

Woodchips can be expensive to buy when you need large quantities and this will be an expense you’ll need to expect every spring.

Mulch for garden beds: You don’t want to use woodchips on your garden beds as mulch. They’re very carbonaceous, so often when they get mixed into the soil they steal nitrogen from the surrounding plants to aid them in breaking down. Vegetable plants need a lot of nitrogen, so this could affect their health.

Instead, opt for straw, hay, leaves, grass clippings or other organic matter. You can read more about mulching your garden in this post.

Cardboard: If you’re going with installation option one below, you’ll need to source a big pile of cardboard. This is your excuse to go dumpster diving if you’ve never done so!

Where I live most businesses have a cardboard recycling dumpster behind their stores that are clean and dry and only contain cardboard.

If you need large pieces go to a bike or appliance store, smaller pieces can be found at restaurants, craft stores, and liquor stores. I like to pick a strip mall nearby and cruise in my car behind the stores and peek in the dumpsters until I find cardboard.

Construction Options: 

Option 1: Cardboard over grass with imported soil.

If you didn’t plan ahead you can simply install mounded beds over your grass. I like to completely cover the grass with cardboard to make extra sure it’s going to die a quick death and not grow into my new garden bed. 

I don’t recommend having grass in your garden aisles, so you should cover the entire area – beds and paths.

If you opt for this method, you’ll need to order soil to construct the beds. This is the method I used in my garden.

Option 2: Kill the grass ahead of time and use your own soil

If you’re planning ahead, you could try to get away with building the beds out of your own soil. But, in order to get to the soil, you’ll need to kill the grass first.

If you’d like to try this option, you’ll need to smother and kill the grass over the course of several months before you can get started. You can use tarps, cardboard, black plastic or anything that doesn’t let any light through.

Ideally, you’d cover your future garden area in late summer or fall and let the grass die over the winter and early spring.

I don’t have any photos of gardens with smothered soil, but the installation method after the grass is dead is the same as the next option.

Option 3: Remove the grass and use your own soil

When I was installing gardens for other people, I used this method during the first few years. I would rent a manual sod stripper from a local hardware store and remove all of the grass in the garden area. Then I would use a shovel to loosen the soil and form the beds.

I’ve moved away from this method because stripping the sod can be a lot of work and you need somewhere to put it once you remove it. If you have a big compost bin you can cart it there and then add it back to your garden again once it’s broken down.

But, sod is heavy and takes a lot of work to move, so I don’t necessarily recommend this method. You also end up removing a lot of your topsoil.

It would be a good choice if you have a limited budget and don’t want to order soil, and you weren’t able to kill the grass ahead of time.

First, I’ll show you how I used installation option #1 to create my garden, then I’ll share photos from previous clients’ gardens demonstrating installation options #2 and #3.

Mounded Raised Bed Installation Option #1

After installing the seven wooden raised beds in my front garden, which you saw above, that fall I expanded the garden back towards my house by creating six mounded raised beds and an herb spiral.

The first thing I did was use a long measuring tape to figure out my design. You can do this right in the garden or on a piece of paper or graph paper depending on how your mind works.

I wanted to break up the linear design of this garden by creating a focal point and I chose to build an herb spiral out of reclaimed bricks. You can learn how to build your own in this blog post.

This is the finished herb spiral. The next step was using my favorite trick of stakes and twine to lay out the design in real-time to see what it looked like and make any final tweaks.

I’m a visual person, so I like to see how it’s all going to look before I start.

Next, I laid cardboard over the grass in the footprint of the garden bed. Then I used a wheelbarrow to transport soil to form my mounded beds.

I made them about 6-8 inches high. They’ll settle over time, so you should make them higher than you want if possible.

You can see I added a slight curve to the bed design to add a little more interest and contrast with the wood raised beds.

After I filled and shaped the beds, I covered the aisles in cardboard and woodchips, took a few photos, and then mulched the beds with hay.

I was constructing this garden at the end of October and wasn’t planning on using the beds until the next spring. I didn’t want the soil to erode, get compacted by wind and rain, or be inoculated with weed seeds, so I mulched them thickly for the winter.

These six mounded beds are all slightly curved, 3.5 ft. wide, and of varying lengths between 6.5 – 13.5 ft. long.

Below is an illustration of my final garden design for my front yard vegetable garden. The next spring I extended the fence around the entire garden.

Read more: Building a Raised Bed Garden – How deep should a raised bed garden be?

I installed this garden in October 2014 and it’s still the same layout six years later as I’m writing this article.

Mounded Raised Bed Installation Options #2 & #3

If you don’t want to order soil, you can follow this installation method. I used it for many years when I designed and installed vegetable gardens for clients. Although this was the last time I used it because removing the sod is way too much work.

After this job, I switched to the cardboard over grass method above.

To remove the grass you’ll either need to smother and kill it, like we discussed above in installation option #2, or remove it with a sod stripper.

During this job we used a gas sod stripper since it was such a huge installation. We had to load the sod into a trailer and haul it to the city compost site since the client didn’t have a large enough space to compost it.

Our first step was to remove the grass. You wouldn’t have to do this if you completely killed it.

Then, I laid out the design with stakes and twine. We created the beds by digging the existing soil to loosen and fluff the soil in the bed. Sometimes you can also dig out some of the soil in the aisles and flip it into the beds to create more loft.

Although I don’t recommend tilling long term, you could also till within the bed just this once to loosen the soil.

  I did order a load of compost to add to the top of the beds. If you’re going to plant immediately you should also add a balanced organic fertilizer, which we’ll talk about later in the post.

As with every installation in this article, we mulched all the beds and paths once we formed all of the garden beds.

This was a huge installation job and it was a ton of work. But, when the season progressed it really blossomed into a magnificent front yard vegetable garden!

You can read more about this project and lots of photos in this article.

Easy Raised Garden Bed Option #3: Timber & Stone Beds

I have to admit, even after adding six additional beds to my front yard garden, I still had another spot on my property that had full sun and was just begging for a garden.

So, the following month I recruited my husband to help me install the third phase of my vegetable garden in my side yard – five more raised garden beds.

For this expansion, I chose another style of easy raised garden bed to construct. This was the style of beds we used at our previous house and in our long-time community garden plot. We call it our signature style! And it’s all about logs and rocks.

It’s like a more organic style of the wooden raised beds in option one.

The benefits of this style of raised beds are:

Quick: These beds don’t require tools or building skills. They’re more assembled than constructed. You can easily make several in an afternoon work session.

Inexpensive: My husband is an arborist, so he was able to source the logs for free. In fact, he had been saving cedar logs from various jobs throughout the season for just this purpose.

If you don’t have access to logs, you can purchase inexpensive landscape timbers from your local home improvement store. Although try to find something that’s untreated.

Shape: The shape of these beds are between the linear style of the wooden raised bed and the organic style of mounded beds. You can arrange the logs and stones into curving shapes and if you use rocks for the ends you’ll have a more organic feel.

The drawback of these garden beds are:

Cost: If you don’t have access to free wood and stones, you might have to source some locally and get them delivered. You’ll also need soil to fill the beds.

Design & Supplies Needed

Size options: Similar to the other two styles of raised beds, your log beds should be 4 ft. wide or less. Anything wider starts to make it difficult to reach into the middle of the bed. And as with mounded beds, you’re less restricted by length, you can make them as long as you want.

Height: The taller your beds the more soil you’ll need to purchase to fill them. I suggest building them between 4-8 inches tall.

Wood: We primarily used cedar logs for our beds. They were of various diameters, which we didn’t really mind. We tried to arrange similar wood in the same beds. They all ended up slightly different, which I like!

If you aren’t married to an arborist like me, you could try to source free logs from a tree being removed on your property or a friend or neighbor’s house. You could also contact some tree care companies to see if they have extra logs laying around their shop they’d want to sell.

If not, you can purchase non-treated timbers from your local home improvement store.

Stone: We scavenged a lot of stone over the years for our community garden plot. We took some stone from there to construct these beds and also got some from friends and neighbors.

I’d suggest looking on Craigslist in your area. People often give away and sell leftover stones from various projects.

If you can’t find any through those sources, you can order stone to be delivered from a local landscape supply store in your area.

Soil: Once you settle on bed size and length, you can use this soil calculator to figure out how much soil you’ll need to order to create your beds. Make sure you’re ordering a mix that’s appropriate for growing food. I like mixes that are 1/2 compost and 1/2 topsoil.

Organic fertilizer: I recommend adding a balanced organic fertilizer to all of your new garden beds before planting. I’ve had mixed experiences with soil I’ve ordered for my garden. Often it’s lacking the nutrients vegetable plants need to grow.

I gathered several suggestions from reputable companies in my Amazon storefront here. You can read more about organic fertilizer and what you should look for when selecting one to purchase in this article.

Mulch for garden paths: I use a thick layer of woodchips for all of my garden paths because they last a long time. I usually add a new layer once a year in spring. You can really use whatever material you want for your paths, stones, gravel, pavers, bricks, and more.

Again, being married to an arborist has its advantages, including an unlimited supply of woodchips. If you have a tree pruning or removal scheduled for your property, ask the tree care company to leave behind the woodchips.

There’s also a website called Chip Drop where you can sign up to receive free woodchips from local tree care companies.

Woochips can be expensive to buy when you need large quantities and this will be an expense you’ll need to expect every spring.

Mulch for garden beds: You don’t want to use woodchips on your garden beds as mulch. They’re very carbonaceous, so often when they get mixed into the soil they steal nitrogen from the surrounding plants to aid them in breaking down. Vegetable plants need a lot of nitrogen, so this could affect their health.

Instead, opt for straw, hay, leaves, grass clippings or other organic matter. You can read more about mulching your garden in this post.

Cardboard: If you’re installing over grass, you’ll need to source a big pile of cardboard. This is your excuse to go dumpster diving if you’ve never done so! Where I live most businesses have a cardboard recycling dumpster behind their stores that are clean and dry and just contain cardboard.

If you need large pieces go to a bike or appliance store, smaller pieces can be found at restaurants, craft stores, and liquor stores. I like to pick a strip mall nearby and cruise my car behind the stores and peek in the dumpsters until I find cardboard.

Now that you have all of your supplies, let’s walk through the installation process.

Similar to option two, I used a measuring tape and stakes to figure out how we wanted to lay out the beds. Our property slopes down towards the garage in this part of the yard, so we decided to build the beds perpendicular to the house going down the slope.

As you can see above, we were also able to place the logs approximately where we wanted them to help us visualize how it would look.

We built each bed with logs running down the two sides, then we picked through our pile of landscape rocks to create the ends of the garden beds.

Sometimes we used a curved piece of log and a few stones to form the edge of the bed, as you can see in the photo above, and sometimes we used all rocks as in the photo below.

After we got all of the beds built, we laid down cardboard in each bed and filled it with soil. Then we covered the rest of the garden with cardboard and woodchips to kill the grass in the aisles.

We were so tired at the end of this project that I forgot to take the final photos! But, similar to the other two raised bed options our final step was to mulch the beds with hay for the winter.

In this final garden expansion, I added five additional raised garden beds to my yard, for a total of 18 and an herb spiral. That’s a big garden! The sizes of the beds in this phase were between 3.5 – 4 ft. wide and between 11 – 14 ft. long.

Additional Notes & Resources for Easy Raised Garden Beds

If you don’t want to build your own raised beds, there are lots of ready-made options to choose from online. While I haven’t tried any of them yet, I gathered some designs in my Amazon storefront here.

Make sure you read the reviews and the descriptions carefully. Oftentimes the wood isn’t as thick and the beds aren’t a big as you’d get with a DIY garden bed.

Pinterest is a great source of ideas for garden design and layout and raised bed construction. I have a board devoted to Easy Raised Bed Design and one for Vegetable Garden Design.

When you’re trying to get your creative juices flowing, purchasing or borrowing a few garden books can really kickstart your enthusiasm. Here are some of my favorites for design inspiration.

     Before & After Garden Photos

Before and after photos are so much fun to see! And they inspire excitement about the possibilities in your own yard.

So, let’s end this post with some photos from my home vegetable garden installation!

I hope I’ve given you all the resources you need to design and build your own attractive and easy raised garden bed this season! If there’s anything you’re still wondering about, leave a question in the comments!

And if you want to see my garden in a more three dimensional way, come on over to my Youtube channel where I have several video tours of my gardens throughout the season.

Read more about designing and planning your garden:

15 Purple Vegetables You Need to Grow in Your Garden

How to Grow More Food with a Custom Planting Schedule

Beautiful photos of creative and colorful vegetable gardens

Source: https://livingcorner.com.au Category: Garden

source https://livingcorner.com.au/how-to-make-an-easy-raised-garden-bed-for-your-vegetables/

[stargazer1682]

Buffy Season 6 was terrible

Season 6 is a dumpster fire and far from anything I'd describe as "well planned," let alone immaculately written.

The plot is heavily contrived, starting pretty much with the Scoobies plans to bring Buffy back. Why are they bringing her back? Because.

Don't get me wrong, the argument that Buffy's soul MIGHT be in a hell dimension isn't wholly without merit, given that they saw all number of hell dimensions open up before their eyes and Buffy had to sacrifice herself to close a rift between these dimensions in much the same way Angel did, for essentially the same purpose. Knowing the lives they lead, everything they’ve experienced and how cruel they know their universe to be, there would be a very distinct probability that Buffy was in hell. In fact the only reason she wasn't was arguably because being in heaven and pulled out by her friends is the only worse possible fate.

But, Buffy's body was barely cold when they started hatching plans to bring her back; they didn't really even try to move on without her. And as it turns out, bringing someone back isn't actually all that difficult.  I maintain that they should have done a time jump; like 5 years, which would have at least established that they TRIED to move on without her before bring her back. And the effort could have been said to have taken more time than a summer vacation.  Plus it would have better aligned the majority of characters with their real world ages, while create an added facet for why Buffy might feel disconnected from her friends if they’ve literally moved on with their lives. Even Dawn, who be closer to Buffy’s age, would be a practical stranger to her at that point; adding to the isolation.

But this is a minor criticism in the grand scheme of the season though, because the show always cut to the chase; and for the most part I can appreciate that. So let's do the same and really get down to the less excusable contrivances.

Practically everyone’s livin’ in casa de Summers, yet is anyone apparently contributing anything to the expenses?  Not by any indication.  Buffy’s back barely a minute, doesn’t even take time to readjust before going patrolling, and soon after that they say, “welcome back, you’re drowning in debt. Get a job, deadbeat.”

And this leads to a couple of ridiculous plots.  The first of which is Giles’ sudden and inexplicable inability to tell Buffy “no” and establish clear boundaries between them; you know, one of the key essential traits of his character five years running.  And yes, I know, Tony Head wanted to move back to England and that’s fair, but the excuse they gave his character for his absence was, simple put, stupid.  Lots of parental figures have to deal with the transition of a so-called child that they’ve looked after and been responsible for and help usher them into independent adulthood; and they’ve done that, remarkably enough, without moving clear across the flippin’ planet.  This is to say nothing of the conventional dynamics of a Slayer and her support system; which we don’t know enough about, in terms of how previous Slayers that lived into their early 20s managed to get by financially.  There’s been a lot of speculation and the consensus typically leans towards an informal understand that their Watcher supports them.  This arrangement may not be fair and Giles may want Buffy to lead a less restrictive life than the average Slayer had before her, but there are certain practical realities that Giles of all people should understand in this regard.  The first and foremost of which is that, as Slayer, Buffy must put those responsibilities ahead of all others and it’s simply not feasible to expect her to burn the candle at both ends, working a full time job during the day and be a full time Slayer at night.  On top of that is this inane idea he develops that Buffy was somehow shirking her responsibilities, when, again, she doesn’t miss a beat after coming back from the dead before going on patrol.  The thing she struggles with, apart from how she’s going to support herself financially without it interfering with her Slaying duties, is being and adult in her VERY early 20s with a mortgage and single mother to a nearly fully grown teenager; all while dealing with the trauma of coming back to from the dead. This goes beyond the pale of the normal responsibilities of someone going through Buffy’s stage of life in season 6; and any adult going through anything even remotely comparable should not be expected to do that single handedly on their own.  Giles even admits later that being an adult means knowing when to ask for help, which just goes to show that his reason for leaving in the first place is complete and utter BS.

Giles demonstrated greater understanding for what Buffy was going through in season 3 when she merely had to send the man she loved to hell, after being thrown out of her house by her mother; yet here he seems to be utterly clueless.  There are countless ways that Giles could have helped Buffy find her footing, without her being dependant on him, while still explaining Tony’s departure.  But they wanted to set up a story that perpetuated Buffy’s hardship and isolation – hence the reason the writers felt the need to undermine the most obvious and practical solution for her need for a job, working at the magic store.

Then there’s a crux of the season’s conflicts.  And yeah, I guess “life” as a big bad is… something… but decidedly not as effectively well done as the earlier seasons did with the allegorical struggles about adolescence and coming of age during the high school seasons.  

Buffy is isolated from her friends, depressed, emotionally abused by a man taking advantage of her state of mind, drowning in debt (and not taking any of the realistic steps to address it, like dumping the house she can’t afford in favor of a small apartment for her and Dawn.)  Eventually it ceases to be a story arc and just crap on Buffy day.  There’s no joy here; and that’s one of the quixotic things about life and depression, it’s ability to make you think for a second that if you’re able to laugh in this moment, maybe things aren’t all that bad, right before they go back to being terrible.

After Tabula Rasa, once Giles leaves, the quality of the episodes takes a sharp downturn; and subsequently improves upon his return.  There isn’t necessarily a correlation, especially since I’d say opposite is true with Giles’ presence with season 7.  But right off the bat we’ve got Smashed and Wrecked, two incredibly stupid episodes, with equally terrible plot points that redefine the direction of the season.

Buffy starts screwing Spike, and… Amy’s suddenly a creep who could give her mom a run for her money? Oh, and now apparently Willow’s problem with magic is that she’s actually addicted to it, like a drug, and not the abuse of power and lack of moral forethought that they’ve been making it out to be ALL THIS TIME.  No, now she’s suddenly doing ambiguous “magics” in back alleys that have no other apparent purpose than to make her trip.

Now, don’t worry, I didn’t forget about Xander… like the writers seemed to do after season 4…  He’s still there and he’s going to marry Anya; which is going to be is sole defining arc the rest of this season and probably the next; even when the wedding doesn’t happen.  The wedding episode was ALMOST interesting, but the fact is, while I’ve come to not like Xander overall, in the course of multiple re-watches of the series; he was put through a seriously traumatic ordeal in Hells Bells that they just gloss right over by the end of it; and expect him to still get married.  And when he’s not in the right frame of mind to do that, they decide that he’s the AH for it…..  Worse still, he accepts that title, deserved though it may be for a variety of other reasons from over the years; this instance is not one of them.  But Joss has to Joss, which means everyone and everything sucks.

And then there’s the “Trio”…. (sigh)

I mean, they even went to the trouble of acknowledging how pathetic a “challenge” they were in contrast to previous big bads, with a doctor commenting on it during Normal Again. (Augh… Normal Again….)

Warren bordered on a comparatively compelling antagonist, by virtue of him being a complete bastard, but they had to blunt his arc with the nerd shtick; and I’m not sure why I hate it so much, because with the likes of Dick Wilkens’ “gee golly, I just want to be a big snake” attitude or Glory’s valley girl god demeanor, this shouldn’t have felt at odds for a big bad, yet it just doesn’t work.

The bigger problem I think I have with it all is that, ultimately, Warren’s not even the big bad; Willow is – which would be fine too, if her arc leading up to that break wasn’t so terrible.  And here’s the thing, they had all of the pieces to make it work; it was all there. Willow’s story of where she was at in her life and the things she was doing and why she was doing them, closely parallel Warren’s story.  Both characters had the smarts, the power and ambition to do whatever they set their minds to; and neither of them were stopping to ask themselves, “just because I can, should I?” and as a result were seriously abusing the power they had. Both of them undermined the free will of the women they loved, without consideration of the ramifications.  Willow KINDA got it and tried to change, whereas Warren didn’t.  But by trying shoehorn a drug analogy into Willow’s story, while just making Warren an AH, they undermined that parallel and the collision of wills they were ultimately on.

Don’t even get me started on killing off Tara.  That was the wrong decision, full stop.

It should have been Xander. It would arguably have set off Willow at least as much as Tara’s death, and Xander’s spirit could have still appeared to Willow on the cliff to talk her down.  

Then bring Nicky Brendon back for season 7 as the primary embodiment of the First.

[cutiecrates]

Cutie Reviews: Gacha Gacha Crate Sept 19

With this box it’s officially been a year that Gacha Gacha Crate began! Unfortunately they didn’t make any note of that so I feel a little disappointed they didn’t do anything special for it- not only that, but I actually didn’t like this box. I liked maybe 1 or 2 things in it and that is it. This review will probably be skimpier than the August one because of that, and I do plan on giving impute, I’ll just be leaving out the ratings.

But before I begin I wanted to address this so that I don’t sound like an ungrateful brat; please do not let this discourage you from checking out the box. The contents are not in bad shape or low quality, it’s just that you can’t be expected to like every box you know?

Also also, in other news, TokyoCatch has began it’s early stages of testing :3 and I was one of those selected to test it! It’s a lot of fun, although we can’t really win anything yet, I’ve managed to get a handful of stuff and it’s a lot of fun just practicing. I don’t want to give too much detail right now though and risk breaching my agreement to testing, so if you’re curious in that you’ll just have to stay tuned~

For this month, the booklet features an article on Rilakkuma :3 including where he got his start, his concept and name, and his growing popularity; did you guys know he has a 3D animation out on Netflix?! If you want to learn more it’s called “Rilakkuma and Kaoru“.

Rilakkuma Figure

It’s really plain looking right? Well that’s because this is one of those build-able figures, the gachapon comes in the characters body and you just assemble it. So far I’ve gotten Donald Duck and Gengar, and now Kiiroitori- he pretty much came pre-assembled because there’s nothing else to do to him!

That’s kind of lame, but if you like him I guess it’s okay? I’m not a fan of him at all, I mean he’s a little cute but I prefer the bears.

Pokemon Keychain

This series of keychains was inspired by the remake(?) of Mewtwo Strikes Back. Besides Togepi we could get Mewtwo, Mew, Pikachu, and Dragonite, each on a thickly woven chain.

Although I won’t be using this (my phone doesn’t let me use charms on it sadly <_<), I think this is pretty cute. The paint job is pretty decent, but I do see a lot of small lining/indents and it seems the colors are a little off from their positioning. You can’t tell in the pic at all but in person it’s more obvious. I sill think it’s pretty good though.

MTV Keychain

This box is kinda obsessed with keychains don’t you think?

Anyway, this one ended up surprising me, this was definitely not something I expected to see, but because I’m a sucker for food-themed things I found it a little charming. They had a cola one though, I kind of wish I got that but this is just as nice.

This is a rubbery keychain made by Takara Tomy Arts, and each keychain is inspired by past variants of the MTV logo. When I was younger I used to watch that channel a lot, but I eventually outgrew it and it’s probably been 15 years since I watched it. I can’t say I miss it because I’ve become more into things like vocaloids and foreign music, American music doesn’t really appeal to me anymore.

Sushi Mascot

This was the only item I ended up really liking honestly, because it’s a squishy! These sushi sets focus on the various Sashimi plates one might find when preparing or eating sushi; like squish, shrimp, various fishies like tuna and salmon. I’m not a big sashimi type, I really don’t like fish at all, but I still think this is adorable~

The lid can be removed, but the rubbery-squishy pieces are stuck to the inside and can’t be removed. The detail on it is very nice, and the pieces are ultra-soft, this would be a fun item for re-ment or doll pictures. The only thing is that I noticed the little painted details on the shrimp and... whatever is next to it is a little messy. Oddly, those two are also a little sticky in comparison to the other two pieces.

Red Lantern

Red Lanterns (Akachouchin) are often strung up along traditional Japanese drinking and eating establishments and along the streets. There was a handful of possible options to obtain this set, each with their own writing, and as you can see you get 2 stickers, which I think is nice so if you lose a sheet or something would happen, you can replace them.

Also check this out

They light up like real lanterns! It’s really fun, and you can hang them up with the little loop on top of the piece. It’s a cute little thing if you like Japanese cultured items, it’s a bit too big to be used for re-ments though.

I wish we got this during summer, it would have been cute for them to do a fun summer festival themed box.

Dragonball Z Figure

Figures were also kinda hot in this box huh?

Our last item is this decent Dragonball Z figure, as usual I got Goku. I love the translucent hair, it’s neat to look at (it’s also super pointy), and it’s pretty neat for his outfit to be inverted in color. You have to assemble these but they only come in 2 or 3 pieces, plus a clear stand base that is usually a mystery as to how you use it; it took me about 5 minutes to figure it out this time.

As I said, I used to love this series but I can’t say I’m that big into it now; I’d rather get adorable things with anime girls, idols, PriPara and Aikatsu, Pretty Cure, etc... I’ll probably sell this or give it to someone I know.

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Okay guys, that will be it for this review. I know it wasn’t really a review, but I really wasn’t feeling it and I just wanted to hurry up and get through this so that I could get back on track. I’m really, REALLY hoping I like next months better...