#no pressure my friends just extending an option

[mrmxlemons]

WIP Last Lines Tag Game

Share the last 7 (or more) lines from a WIP

— I am posting nearly a whole scene from the WIP but either way… thanks for the tag @cindle-writes and @leafiloaf, I am tagging @coiled-dragon @cornerstoreclown @cannibalinc @bonkin @arabellatheauthor (no pressure!)

Premise: In a Voldemort Wins Alternate Universe, Harry is friends with Tom, the only son of the Lord Voldemort, and following graduation from Hogwarts he’s invited to stay at the Palace Eternal for the summer. It means Harry gets to spend time with Tom. It also means Harry has to meet Tom’s father. (Tomarry, eventual Harrymort, might even become A/B/O who knows)

In which Hermione and Ron express their concern for Harry.

“You’re going to stay with Tom for the summer?” Hermione asks, her brow arched, “Don’t you think that’s a little… odd?”

It’s about the response he expects from her. Ron doesn’t need to say anything for Harry to know the suspicion is mutual between them. Hermione and Ron had never been fan favorites of Tom. “He invited me to the Coronation,” Harry explains. Not that it’s a reason to be there all summer long.

Her expression morphs, “Oh, Harry! That’s so amazing! It’s an honor to go. You must be excited.”

Ron scoffs. Harry expects that, too. The feeling is moot. In a historical sense it might be interesting, but only Hermione would see it that way.

“Yeah,” Harry sighs, “that’s one word for it. Tom’s dad is a prick. Real excited to see him get crowned for, what, the fifth time?”

It feels weird referring to Tom’s dad so casually. Tom himself doesn’t even refer to Lord Voldemort as father, but Harry surely isn’t going to give him the honorific title in a conversation where he could help it. Sovereign Undying is an ego inflating mouthful, anyways. 

Harry doesn’t realize he’s said something that’s shocked them until he breaks from his thoughts, noticing their eerie silence and horrified faces.

“What?” He presses.

Hermione murmurs urgently, “I don’t think you’re allowed to say that.”

Harry nearly rolls his eyes. He stares at Hermione, unconcerned. “Are you going to tell on me?”

He is surprised it’s Ron that responds this time.

“You don’t know who’s listening, mate. That’s why my dad made the whole ‘no politics at dinner’ rule, what with all the portraits lying around.”

“I know about the portraits, Ron.” Harry says testily.

“Yes,” Hermione eases, “everyone knows about the portraits. We’re not saying you don’t, Harry. I think what Ron is trying to say is you can’t be too careful.”

“I can be careful. I’m not stupid.”

“No, but you are brash.”

“And bold,” Ron adds.

“Those words are synonyms for each other, yes,” Hermione says, firm even in her gentle instruction, “Nevertheless, I think Ron brings up a good point. Your… affinity for speaking out is something you’ll have to consider if you’re going to be staying with Tom for a whole summer. Where his… where Lord Voldemort could be in earshot.”

Harry waves her off, “Tom hardly sees him, anyways. They’re practically estranged.”

“That’s not what I’ve heard,” Ron whispers, looking around the room for invisible ears. “There’s been a new chair added at the Wizengamot. My dad thinks they’re adding a new position.”

Harry could see where this is going, but Ron’s tidbit certainly piques Hermione’s curiosity even if Harry knows its bullshit.

“What position?”

“I dunno. An advisor, maybe? I mean, who else would it be besides…”

“Tom would’ve told me about that.” Harry interjects confidently.

Both Ron and Hermione are silent, and unlike before it seems as though neither of them have anything to say. Harry might’ve cheered if their quiet didn’t sound like disagreement.

“He would’ve,” Harry insists, “He doesn’t like his father much, either. I can hardly blame him.”

Ron and Hermione exchange a side eye. “Does he tell you that?”

Harry reddens. It’s not a blush. He’s thought about this before, he isn’t completely unaware of what words can do. But even if Tom doesn’t say ‘I hate my father’ Harry can read between the lines. Tom’s never spoken highly of Lord Voldemort. All of the times he’s brought up in conversation it dwindles to Harry being glad he has no parents in comparison to Tom’s own situation.

“I mean, no—not directly, but he doesn’t need to. He’s quite attentive when I complain.”

“Are you sure he’s not trying to set you up?”

Harry can’t hide the agitation anymore. He really wishes his friends would at least pretend to like Tom. “Ron, I know you don’t like Tom but he’s good to me.”

“We just want you to be safe,” Hermione says.

Harry scoffs, “And you think me being safe includes staying away from Tom.”

“Yes,” Ron says.

“No,” Hermione glares at him. “But it’s good to be cautious. The Palace Eternal is a beautiful place, but it’s not necessarily safe. Most people that stay don’t leave.”

“Yeah, my dad’s only been there, what, once or twice? And he’s had a chair on the Wiz for years.”

“It’s just for a summer,” Harry reaffirms, “And if what you’re saying is true, if Tom is going to be an Advisor, I don’t know how much I’ll see him after, anyways.” Harry looks away from them. He really hopes it isn’t true. He really, really hopes Tom’s not going to be an Advisor to Lord Voldemort. “Besides, I’ve got to find work, I don’t know what I’m going to do still.”

“You’ve still got the offer from the Chudley Cannons, don’t you?”

“Yeah, I don’t know if that’s what I want though. I’m hoping Tom can help me figure something out.”

“You know, you’re always welcome to stay with us at the Burrow. No rush finding a job, either. Mum would be more than happy to have you.” Ron assures, “Fred and George are always looking for new employees.”

Hermione rolls her eyes, “That’s because Fred and George harass their employees with pranks until they leave.”

“Yeah…” Ron agrees sheepishly.

“Regardless,” Hermione starts, “whatever you do, write us. Let us know you’re okay.”

Harry laughs, “It’s not like I’m going there to die, you’ll see me again.”

Hermione and Ron don’t laugh. Harry’s not worried, but they don’t share that sentiment.

[m00nsbaby]

You think you can write some Steven angst. So basically reader and steven love each other very much and are exclusive. But one day reader sees the body with a women and is so sad. But they try to forgot about it and be happy with him. But their friends send photos of the body with other women( could be Layla or random idk which ever hurts more.) Reader starts to distance themselves. Not cuddle as much, pulling away, saying they busy. But reader comes to the apartment because they live together. And the body is in the bed with a women. And you can write what happens next. Whether steven knows about the other two or has no clue.

hurting steven? that's my cup of tea 😈

Ground control.

Steven Grant x reader.

Tags & warnings. Angst, cheating but not at all. ? Mentions of Marc Spector.

Word count. 2.4k

Summary.

Now I think we've lost it all, There's nothing to explain the distances anymore. All systems are critical, Can't find my way back to you. Feels like there's nowhere to go, I'm just out here waiting for you say; "Don't be afraid, no."

All the signs were there.

Being an avid fan of romantic dramas, you knew by heart the signs of infidelity, but you never counted on Steven Grant breaking every law of logic you had memorized before him and his presence in your life.

Someone who looked at you that way couldn't be lying to you.

"Where were you yesterday?" You extended your arms to him, and he immediately understood the message.

You always worked so well.

Steven hugged you, his entire weight pressing down on you, and you complained only about the pressure, not necessarily because you didn't like it. You laughed.

"I was at the museum, lovey. Why?"

"And after that?"

Still resting on top of you, he propped himself up on one arm so he could face you. He had that confused expression on his face that combined with his usual smile.

He genuinely seemed confused.

"I came home, why?"

You decided to drop the subject there, whether as a silly or rational choice. There was nothing wrong with both of you keeping certain things hidden, right? Maybe the girl he was with the day before was just a friend.

And even though logic told you that Steven Grant didn't have many friends, you pushed those thoughts out of your head when you kissed his lips.

"I love you." Your hands cradled his cheeks, and without him being aware, you analyzed his face, hoping to find some kind of micro-expression that would betray his lies.

His little eyes sparkled, his smile widened until those tiny wrinkles you loved so much formed. You could even swear he blushed at the intimacy of the situation, even after 6 months of living together.

He made you doubt your own judgment because even though your eyes had clearly registered what they had seen, when Steven looked at you like that, you were convinced.

He couldn't be lying.

You quickly forgot the issue, even when you came home early and didn't see him there, or when you felt him leave the bed in the early morning. You knew everyone around you thought you were foolish, but you always preferred to call it rational.

Would you forget the love of your life just because Steven had a female friend? Nah, that option was never on the table.

Unfortunately, your friends didn't forget as quickly as you did.

"Is this the girl from last time?"

Attached to the text message was a photo of Steven with the mysterious girl.

Your stomach churned.

"Are you crazy? Don't photograph my boyfriend like that! It's weird, hahaha."

The forced laughter was a way to cover up how suddenly hurt you felt.

Now, in the solitude of your apartment, you had the opportunity to look at the photo until your eyes hurt. Zooming in on the girl's face, her beautiful curly hair, and her deep brown eyes looking at Steven in a way that seemed disgustingly familiar to you.

Steven, on the other hand, had a barely visible face in the photo, and that was killing you. You would have loved to zoom in on his eyes and finally dispel the doubt about whether that tiny glint of brightness was there.

That would have confirmed or discarded any theories you might have had.

The sound of the door almost gave you a heart attack. You dropped your phone, which bounced on the floor as if you had thrown it on purpose.

"I'm home!" He always did that, and for as long as you could remember, it had brought a smile to your face.

Except now, of course. As if the damage wasn't enough, you stepped on your phone to hide it under your shoe.

"What are you doing here?" He entered, laughing, as carefree as ever.

As Steven as ever.

"I was…" You cleared your throat; suddenly, it felt like you were short of breath, but you smiled. It was foolish of you to assume that Steven hadn't noticed you were acting strangely.

When he approached to kiss you, you turned your face, and his lips landed on your cheek.

There was a citrusy scent on his clothes, completely opposite to your sweet perfumes.

Both of you faltered in your smiles; you couldn't stop thinking about his escapades between work, if he was even still going, and Steven trembled at the mere thought of your rejection.

Maybe you just weren't in the mood.

His theory was confirmed when you turned your back on him in bed.

Steven figured that the honeymoon period was over because he could swear you had been in a bad mood all week.

Not that it bothered him at all. He remembered quite clearly all the times he had promised you that he would never leave, no matter how tough things got, and he also remembered that you had done the same on multiple occasions.

And the truth was, this was nothing to him; something as small as this would never make him consider leaving you. If anything, it was more about the fact that he understood he had to work harder to be okay with you.

You were worth the effort, and besides, he really didn't know what had you acting this way; there could be a million reasons behind it, and probably any of them made sense.

"Look." It was the first thing he said when you entered the apartment.

He was there early, which was a good sign.

"I saw it on my way here." Your eyes focused on the bouquet of roses he held in his right hand and then offered to you along with his best smile.

Butterflies fluttered in your stomach, and although you would have loved to hide your smile, it was impossible for you.

"It's beautiful, Steven." It had been a while since you alternated between his nicknames and his name. He had to confess that he didn't like not always being "my love," sometimes he was just "Steven," but he would deal with it.

Your smile was worth it; he saw you genuinely happy for once in what had been quite some time for both of you.

And although the kiss you gave him on the lips was very quick and short, he felt well rewarded for his small gesture.

Over time, the situation became difficult for him to deal with, and not precisely because Steven wasn't a patient man, but because panic could consume him quickly when it came to his self-esteem.

He was never shy about expressing how much he loved you, verbally, through actions, even in writing, so it shouldn't have been a surprise to you that your rejection meant constant blows to his heart.

He felt cold at night when you refused to hug him back or when you pushed him away slowly until he let go, you stopped welcoming him home with a kiss or rather stopped welcoming him at all, there were days when he would find you asleep when he arrived.

Regardless of whether the sun hadn't fully set yet.

You had also stopped responding to his "I love you." If he was lucky, maybe you would murmur a small "me too." Only if he was lucky.

"I finished another book." He tried to get your attention with a sad smile, and you looked at him over your laptop.

Turned out, Steven and you had this habit where your motivation to read was him. He finished books in days and made the silliest and funniest annotations anyone could imagine; you refused to read books involving Egyptian mythology if they hadn't passed through Steven's hands before.

"I don't think I have time these days." Lie. You had more time than you would like. "Maybe you can lend it to someone else."

Your boyfriend had a collection of similar comments that you had made before stored in his memory, and he wondered what he wasn't understanding.

Were you suspecting something about him?

Steven refused to believe it.

Why? Simply because it didn't make sense, not when his life revolved around his job, the apartment he shared with you, and you.

It would be bonkers to simply assume something like that.

"Just tell me what I'm doing wrong." He was almost sobbing as both of you had the argument of your lives.

You couldn't remember ever hearing Steven raise his voice before, and he couldn't recall ever hearing you so upset, specifically with him.

His questions were pushing you to the limit; he had such an incredible way of pretending he had no idea what was going on that you felt like you were about to explode. You didn't have the strength to tell him in your own words what you knew was happening. The least you hoped for was that Steven would be brave enough to tell you he was having an affair.

"It's her, Steven!" You broke down; your hands were rubbing your face desperately.

And he didn't understand, of course he didn't.

His lower lip trembled in a pout.

"Who, love?" His broken voice made you tremble in your place. "What are you talking about? Just tell me, and we'll figure out how to fix it."

And the cycle repeated itself. You didn't have the strength to refute Steven when he seemed so bewildered by your questions.

That night, you slept in his arms for the first time in a long while, and everything felt like trying to connect two puzzle pieces that didn't fit together. Both stressed, in pain, and with tears in your eyes, wondering how to fix this.

How could you deal with the love you had for him while each day he found new ways to break your heart?

Everything exploded on an ordinary Wednesday as you were returning from work.

When you noticed that the apartment door wasn't locked, you swallowed hard, expecting the worst. What if you walked in and all your stuff had disappeared? Neither you nor Steven were in a position to take extra shifts.

You mustered up the courage and took a step inside, better now than never. You chose to be silent, just in case someone was still inside, and you had to make a quick escape.

Of course, within seconds, the sounds coming from your shared bedroom immediately shattered any theories involving burglars or anything similar. However, this situation somehow turned your stomach even more.

Your hand trembled, your whole body trembled.

Before entering the bedroom, you already knew what you would find, and yet you had to verify it with your own eyes because in your mind, you still believed that your Steven would never be capable of doing something like this to you.

But there he was, still wearing the clothes he had left in that morning, on top of the mysterious girl, the one with beautiful curly hair and chocolate eyes that you could even identify as 'precious.'

"Steven!?" You screamed, finally pulling him out.

"Fuck." It was the only thing he could mumble as he got up from bed.

Had it been stupid on Marc's part to do something like this? Definitely, but the thing was, this game of the two lives was beginning to get out of control. There came a point where he couldn't keep lying to Layla about where he was staying.

You should have noticed that your things were hidden when you arrived.

The framed photographs were facing downward.

"You're the… biggest fucking idiot." you muttered as best you could, tears overflowing from your eyes to the point where neither of them was visible to you. Your legs threatened to give way as you turned to leave.

Marc followed you with the intention of giving you an explanation, even with a deeply confused Layla behind him.

What he didn't account for was that the stress of the moment would cause an immediate switch with Steven. He was there as always, protecting him from an emotional blow while he destroyed Steven's life.

He stumbled to his knees, but his hand still clung to your arm, partly for stability and partly to try to keep you from leaving, because when it came to you, his body reacted automatically.

"Let go of me!"

You couldn't see it, but he was constantly blinking, trying to adjust to the room's light. He felt nauseous as his body tried to understand that he wasn't in the museum as he had believed for a while.

"Love?" He stammered, confused, and you pulled your arm away again. "What are you doing?"

It didn't take him long to understand, though. His disheveled clothes, his racing heart, and Layla's confused gaze behind both of you seeming to be on the verge of exploding.

"Marc?" Her voice made him tense even more. Why did it sound so familiar? "Who is she? What's going on?"

You ignored him because at that moment, you managed to break free of his grip. He was basically chasing you, and it was pushing you to your limits.

"I don't want to see you." You mumbled, quickly grabbing your belongings, money, your cell phone, your charger.

Yes, that one was shared with Steven.

"You don't understand, love, I didn't…" He could barely form coherent sentences; he was only sure that he didn't want to let you go.

And yes, even with the scene you were causing, he followed you out of the apartment.

"I don't get it, I don't know what… It's… I don't know what happened." He sounded terrified, and you wondered to what extent he would keep this facade up.

"Please let me go," you said with a trembling voice as your free hand pushed open the building door. "Steven, you're hurting me." You had wanted to say those words for months.

Only then was he able to loosen his grip.

"Don't look for me, please, I beg you, let me be alone." You managed to put together that sentence without looking at him. Maybe you would regret it if you saw that pained expression again.

He let you go with a horrible headache, feeling like he was about to faint. He sat at the foot of the stairs, both hands covering his face, and his tense body suffering uncontrollable spasms from crying."

Steven didn't stop looking for you, even though a physical encounter became impossible when no one told him where you were staying.

You had to change your phone number when your phone wouldn't stop ringing as soon as you turned it on. Millions of calls and millions of text messages.

Of those, only one caught your attention.

"I'm sick, I finally understand."

And underneath, another message.

"Can we talk? I can explain everything, love, please."

You deleted it along with the rest, and after turning off the phone, you placed it face down in the drawer that had become its permanent home.

Mk's tag list :)

@ninebluehearts @icreatedthisat317am @onefinnedwonder-fm @shousha133

[fromallie]

an unexpected confession - tsukishima kei ✧˖*°࿐

it was a hot summer day when it seemed like love polluted the air, you and your friends were hiding from the heat in a classroom and talked about romance to kill the time.

the bell rang and you all took your seats, whilst you organised your stuff for the period your friend who sat beside you asked "hey y/n, do you happen to like anyone?"

your eyes widened at the sudden question, you did have someone in mind but you were positive they didn't like you back,

"there is this one person i find attractive, but i'm not sure if they like me back."

some of your friends who were in your class overheard you and rushed around your table to pressure you into telling them who you liked.

they stared at you with devious and hopeful eyes as they begged you to tell them who you liked, you started to regret revealing you liked someone and put your hands up in surrender,

"please, i promise it's no one, you really don't need to bother!"

they pouted at you and persisted with their questions, "oh come on y/n, we're friends aren't we.. tell us!!'

you whined and felt your resolve dissolve as you decided to give into their bombards, "fine, i guess i kind of like tsukishima but you have to promise you won't tell anyone."

the girls fell quiet as you felt a tap on your shoulder, how stupidly perfect did this work out for you huh? having a feeling you knew who it was, you pretended you didn't feel anything as you watched your friends escape to their seats.

"come on y/n, would you look at me?"

you decided to face your fate and who else to grace you with their presence but the tsukishima kei. he grabbed you by the wrist and dragged you out of your seat and the classroom into an empty hallway.

as he dragged you into a corner, you watched as he smirked at you teasingly and you turned around not wanting to have to deal with this, "what do you want tsukishima."

"i think you know what i want y/n."

you whined when he grabbed you by your shoulders turning and pushing you against the wall, forcing you to face him.

"what was it you said in the classroom, i think i have a good idea of what you said but could you confirm it for me?"

the position he forced you into was kinda compromising, he towered over you and left little room for you to try and escape.

"i have no idea what you're talking about."

he smirked and laughed at your attempt to play dumb, "come on y/n, everyone knows you like me now so, just admit it."

you blushed at his words and looked anywhere but his stupid face, it was apparent he was against having anything go right for you so he used his thumb to guide your face to look at his.

"just admit you like me, if you do i'll even let you kiss me or you can say you don't and we can head back to the classroom and forget this ever happened."

you contemplated your options, would it better to risk your dignity and admit your feelings or should you run away and deny your feelings? you decided to take your chances and confess the truth, "i guess i like you or whatever."

you watched as his hands moved to grab your waist and pull you close, your faces mere inches away from each other, you could feel his breath on your lips before he closed the distance making contact.

his lips were soft and you felt your face begin to heat up, pulling away for air his hands grabbed your hair pushing you back into the kiss. you watched as your defences broke down and you gave in to him, melting into his kiss. your hands wrapped around his neck and brought him even closer to your body.

finally the two of you pulled away, you stared at each other for a moment before you started laughing. "you must really like me huh, tsukishima?" he smiled and pushed you away, "in your dreams, let's go back to class you idiot."

you watched as he extended his hands out to yours, and you accepted it, walking back to class together hand in hand.

a/n: i've been testing out different layouts, i want to add pictures to my posts but i have no idea how to do that without making it look ridiculous T-T i hope you enjoyed this post !!

[seehisbriefs]

Subtle Humiliation is my favorite

My favorite form of dominance is subtle - the kind of dominance that can't be easily protested. When the submissive one can only helplessly whine while they agree to behave because they're unable to argue with the logic presented to them - even if the logic is absurd. In the story below, our shy tighty whities boy has just been pressured in to making a promise to each of his friends that he'll continue to wear tighty whities until his friends agree he's mature enough and ready for boxers. With the promise made, his friends are now trying to make him whine and feel embarrassed by extending the scope of the promise as much as they reasonably can. He's just been told that they don't even want to see him looking at boxers at the store as there's no reason for him to be in the boxers or boxer briefs section anymore:

Him: "But why does it matter if I even look at boxers or boxer briefs? It's not like looking will change anything." The question, tinged with frustration, seeks some semblance of logic in the rules that have been imposed upon him, a plea for reasonableness amidst what feels increasingly unreasonable. Friend 1: "It's about temptation, man. If you're serious about sticking to our agreement, then even looking at boxers is a step in the wrong direction. Think of it like... like sticking to a diet. You wouldn't hang out in a candy store, would you?" His friend's analogy, meant to simplify the concept, only serves to underline the absurdity of the comparison. The idea that even the visual consideration of an alternative form of underwear is equated to a breach of discipline underscores the extent of control they feel entitled to wield. Friend 2: "Exactly. It's like if you're trying to save money, you don't go window shopping at expensive stores. Staying away from the boxers section is just avoiding unnecessary temptation." Him: "That's not the same thing at all. We're talking about underwear, not life-changing decisions." Despite his protest, the conversation continues to spiral, with each friend offering their own interpretation of why this restriction is both reasonable and necessary. Friend 3: "And remember, if someone—even jokingly—offers you boxers or boxer briefs, saying 'no' is the only option. Like if you're allergic to peanuts, you wouldn't just accept a peanut butter sandwich, right?"

Friend 1: "We need to hear you say it. Promise us you won't look at boxers or boxer briefs anymore. Not even a glance." Him: (feeling the absurdity and the pressure) "Fine, I promise I won't look at boxers or boxer briefs. Happy now?" Friend 2: "And what's your strategy at the store? How will you avoid the temptation?" Him: (sighing, the indignity of the situation sinking in) "I... I guess I'll just avoid the underwear section altogether. Stick to whatever list I have and get out." Friend 3: "That might not be enough. Maybe you shouldn't be going to the store alone at all. We don't want you accidentally wandering into a 'tempting' situation." Him: "Wait, what? Now I can't even shop by myself?" His incredulity grows as the conversation spirals into considerations that treat him not as an independent adult but as someone incapable of making even the simplest decisions without oversight. Friend 1: "It's not a bad idea. Maybe one of us should go with you, at least for a while. Or we could talk to your dad about taking over your underwear shopping again. Just to make sure there's no... slip-ups." Him: "This is ridiculous. I'm not a child. You can't just decide these things for me." Friend 2: (ignoring his protests) "Honestly, it's for the best. We're just trying to help you stay on track. It's easier if you don't have to make these choices alone." His attempts to protest and assert his independence are met with a wall of patronizing agreement among his friends, who discuss his underwear as if he's not there, as if his preferences and autonomy are secondary to the "commitment" he's been coerced into making.

[argisthebulwark]

Once you become guild master there's a dark elf new recruit who will say "so youre the one everyone's falling over" when you walk by him and holy shit i can not take that in any other way that brynjolf is not the only one who has a crush on tld, especially now that she's their boss. Now it's pretty much canon that everyone in the guild's in love with you. When you're not there they argue who would be a better partner for you.

"She's mine."

"She's your boss, she's my future wife."

"The Guild Master wouldn't marry you."

"Break it up, kids." Vekel groaned, placing a round of ales in front of the thieves against his better judgment. They were all completely sloshed - Brynjolf's face almost as red as his hair and Vex wobbling in her seat but he knew better than to get in their way.

Every time the new Guild Master left on a job or some extended trip they had the same argument. Vekel had heard it so many times he and Tonilia could recite it word for word. Despite their constant bickering none of them had yet approach the Guild Master with their feelings and it drove the poor bartender mad.

"Vekel." Brynjolf wheeled around, grabbing Vekel's arm. "Don't you agree that she's sweet on me?"

"She's your friend, you mentored her." Rune hiccupped, finger wagging in Brynjolf's face. "But who does she come to when she's upset? Or bored? Me. She sits next to me and talks for hours."

"You're both wrong." Vex sounded smug, curling into the seat of her chair. Delvin's hand subtly reached out to steady her before she fell on her ass. "Whenever she gets a job from one of you she comes running to me for all the dirty little details."

"So, you're helping her to her job? I'm the one who shared a bedroll with her when we got stuck in Windhelm."

"You're still going on about that?"

"Oh for gods' sake." Vekel muttered, shaking Brynjolf's hand off and returning to the bar. Tonilia shot him a quick look but he was exhausted and wanted nothing more to retire for the evening. Knowing this argument they'd be stuck in the Flagon for hours, downing ale until their words slurred together.

"You have some input, Vekel?"

Unexpectedly, the thieves hushed. He felt all of their eyes narrow on him and he drummed his fingers on the bar as he thought through his options. He could make up an excuse about some spill and let them keep going as usual. Or he could finally say something.

"You're all sitting here proclaiming that you're in love with the Guild Master but have any of you told her how you feel?" Saying it after months of hearing their bickering felt like a weight lifted from his shoulders. "Have any of you bothered to ask the Guild Master how she feels about all this?"

"Well,"

"I don't want to pressure her into -"

"Yeah, I don't want to push her."

Their overlapping excuses was just as annoying as the fighting. Brynjolf turned back to the others and Vekel caught sight of Ravyn sneaking toward the Cistern. He couldn't hold it against the poor bastard but his offhanded compliment had lit the fire for this entire situation - "so you're the one everyone's falling over." So simple yet it had earned Vekel many nights of their droning voices.

"Why don't you all just grow a pair and talk to the Guild Master?"

"Talk to me about what?"

Tonilia's eyes were as wide as dinner plates and Vekel was certain he heard Ravyn skittering back into the Flagon when the Guild Master's voice cut through all the chatter. Every pair of eyes shot to her - eyes hardly visible under that damned hood, hands on her hips and staring down the table of thieves. The timing was so perfect he wondered how long she'd been listening.

"Anyone going to speak up?" Her foot tapped and she tossed back the hood, glaring around at the thieves. Wide eyes stared back at her, cheeks flushed from alcohol and the embarrassment Vekel knew hit every single one of them. Good, it was about time they owned up to their feelings. "What do you need to tell me?"

Absolute silence fell upon the Flagon. Vekel tried to guess which one of them would say it first - maybe Brynjolf since he'd been flirting with her since they met, or Vex would have some backhanded compliment for her. Vekel had his suspicions about Delvin - he always seemed to float around the argument without actually engaging.

"Oh, come on." Ravyn's flat voice broke the silence. "Haven't I already told you this? They're all into you."

Pandemonium broke out in the Ragged Flagon. Excuses and accusations flew back and forth while Vekel watched the Guild Master's shock cool into something more dangerous. One by one the thieves noticed her glare, the way her arms crossed over her chest and quieted once more.

"None of you thought to speak to me?" Her voice was deadly, cold. Brynjolf turned in his seat, clearing his throat as if he could appear sober.

"We didn't want to sway you, lass. You know, didn't want our feelings to change how you feel about us."

"How very kind of you all." Her tone conveyed that it was anything other than kind. Vekel started to pity the poor fools - they looked like they were in for a verbal beatdown. Sure they were annoying but he hadn't anticipated this. "Next time, come to me as adults." Her tone softened when she turned away, heading for the Cistern. "I'll tell you how I feel."

A few thieves chugged their ale before heading after her, others scrambling out of their seats the moment she exited the Flagon. Vekel winked at Tonilia, knowing that they'd have a new game - guessing which of these hopeless romantics she'd choose as her lover.

[icemanzek]

Free Apps/Assets that help me as an Indie Game Developer [Megapost]

Hi! I’m an indie gamedev who’s also in University, needless to say that I’m on a budget when it comes to my game creation. I’m making this post to organize my favourite free resources that helped me out.

Also, please note that I’m only commenting on the programs themselves, not the companies/individuals that run them.

For Pixel Art, I use/recommend Dotpict.It’s completely free, you can resize canvases and input custom sizes. It has the essential tools for pixel art creation, and is great to use on small screens with the default point-and-click system. It can also be used on larger touch screens with in “Pen mode”. It also supports animation! Alternatives include Pixquare and Resprite, which function similar to Aseprite for computer. (Resprite does have limited exports in the free version.)

I was recommended Notion by a fellow gamedev friend for organizing ideas/stories. It’s essentially a files-within-files organizer where you can make groups, add pages to the groups, and link other pages. I now use it for my concepts, and am really enjoying it so far.

My go-to for fonts is DaFont. The website allows you to sort and filter in order to only show 100% free fonts to use in your projects. I’ve been using this site for years, and from my experience each download was completely safe.

I’m an RPGMaker user, and rpgmakerweb is a great resource for finding free plugins. Yanfly is also one of the most popular picks for plugins as well. Galv and SRDude are amazing creators with some of the best plugins I've personally ever used.

Launchpad is a beat-mixer app with a literal labyrinth of samples. You can get a free trial to have access to all of them, and I’d recommend it for people looking to explore different genres for in—game music. It’s super fun to just mess around in. You can record and export as well.

FireAlpaca is my personal recommendation for a free digital art software for computer. I’ve used it in the past, and it’s truly a great free alternative to expensive art programs. Krita is also a great free option!

Cymatics is a great resource for free-to-use royalty-free samples/loops. I have a huge sound library thanks to them, and I haven’t paid a cent. Joining their email list also gets you more free packs & the occasional free giftcard.

YoutubeDL is a free and open-source program on Github that allows the safe (speaking on personal experience) download of Youtube videos, as well as audio format. I use this to download royalty-free samples/SFX that are posted on Youtube for anyone to use. You can also download a .exe from their website with the YTDL program directly in it (my personal choice).

Online-Convert is a free online file converter. I've personally relied on it to convert my music into OGG format, and I haven't had any problems with it so far. There are many other converters for lots of different needs and formats as well.

BFXR is a free downloadable program that is great for making digital sound effects for your games. I was actually recommend this program by my prof in first year. You can use all FX in any use for free!

Ibis Paint X is a free drawing app for Apple devices/other mobile devices that support pen pressure. You can upgrade to the full version, but the free version has a lot of options.

Fortelling is great for planning out stories and worldbuilding. It’s optimized for writers to keep track of their projects. You can make timelines, add characters with customizable traits & avatars, create locations, specify items/languages/species, and a lot more. There is a premium subscription version, but I’m perfectly content with the features that come with the default.

Design Cuts is a website for lots of artistic resources, including Procreate brushes, graphic design assets, and more. They give out weekly freebies, as well as an extended commercial license included with every purchase. There’s frequent sales too, and you get so support independent artists.

Feel free to reblog/add your own favourite free resources to share with other devs/artists! I’ll update this post as needed.

Website / Discord Server / Patreon

[coldshrugs]

wip wednesday

wow i'm on time!! ty @lilas and @lavampira beloveds!

i'll tag (with no pressure): @scionshtola @galadae @hylfystt @birues @impossible-rat-babies and also everyone meg and dani tagged. you're tagged again 💗

this is all being edited and will likely change but :>

The silence is not a comfort to her now. It stretches on like the gaping canyon below the city, churning with the force of something unfathomable. The street lanterns flicker to life on either side of her. "Io." He pries her away from the stone railing, and the unspoken question remains. But he smiles again, and she joins him as he playfully jostles her shoulder. Finally, now that the crowd has thinned, she throws her arms around him and squeezes until he shakes with low, rumbling laughter. He squeezes back. She steadies herself with a deep breath and releases him. They walk on. "I'm sorry. If you must know, I am a bit jealous of you. Your continued adventures. I haven't adjusted to standing still." "Easily remedied, no?" Estinien shrugs casually. "We will make our own adventure. Unless you've been chained at the ankle, what keeps you from going where you please, at least for a day? If you want for decent company, well, I cannot claim decency. But we are friends, are we not?" "Of course we are." Io bumps her shoulder against his. "Alas, the chain is metaphorical, and therefore heavier than you've imagined, and it has everything to do with the title you'd rather ignore." He crosses his arms, steps slowing as they near Fortemps Manor. "You don't even mean to try?" "I did not say that! I only meant–" "Io, dearest! And is that Ser Estinien?" Haurchefant's voice cuts through her retort. She did not hear the door open, but she certainly hears it shut as he takes the opportunity to join them. "The steward said you were out on errands, but I never expected you to procure such a treasure as the nation's final Azure Dragoon. How are you, my friend?" Haurchefant extends his hand to Estinien, who clasps his arm with practiced neutrality. The tight line of his lips tells another story–his annoyance at this interruption. For a blessing, this goes ignored by Haurchefant, but there is comfort in knowing she is not the only one hanging to her charades by a thread. "Fine," Estinien says. His gaze follows the arm he's just released settling around Io's waist. "And pray, if we must prattle on about rank, 'Knight Commander' is the less abrasive option." Haurchefant's expression brightens beyond possibility. "You are returning for good then?" "For now."

[writingintheshadowsforever]

My Loves are Calling but so are The Angels

For someone who has been an Avenger since day one you know the dangers that came with. The superhero lifestyle after all you saw all the possibilities come to life up close and personal to your friends.

Rhodey got shot out of the sky by Vision's energy beam, and was paralyzed from the waist down for an extended period of time. Tony said it was a miracle his best friend even survived.

Pietro succumbing to his injuries after taking a ray of bullets protecting Hawkeye despite his regenerative healing factor.

Natasha and Tony die saving the rest of the world from Thanos.

You knew it was a blessing that you had never suffered a life-threatening injury, or career-ending injury. You thanked God everyday that you were able to return home to your loved ones safe and in one piece, never taking it for granted.

But you should've known at some point your day too was going to come.

You downplayed the whole hostage situation with Ayo and Aneka insisting that. You would've come up with a plan before things took a turn for the worse. Neither of them were really convinced by your words, but at the end of the day. You were still an Avenger, Ayo was the General of the Dora Milaje, and Aneka was the main overseer of the Midnight Angels with Okoye leaving Wakanda. Your duty was to protect the world and anyone who needed it. Their duty was to protect Wakanda and the royalty.

They couldn't be there for every single one of your missions, and you made it clear from the start. You had no intention of walking away from being a superhero anytime soon. So all Ayo and Aneka could do was plead with you to stay safe and come back alive. You promised them you would do your best, and you knew all too well.

Tomorrow was never promised.

Sam warned you the mission would be a bit more high-leveled than. The others you were given, and not so much suggested but pleaded with. You can just wait for Bucky to become available to go, or even to take Kate Bishop technically the new Hawkeye along. But Bucky had another month before his schedule was going to clear up. So that wasn't an option; the mission was too time sensitive for that.

Kate Bishop had potential and you entertained the idea until Clint gave you. The overprotective dad made it obvious he was attached to the young girl, and she just might not be ready for such a huge mission. You were going to have a tough enough time watching your own back. You didn't want or need the pressure of keeping an eye on a newbie who could easily make a number of rookie mistakes.

So you decided to take the risk and go at it alone. There was no other choice, not when kids were going missing, and some of them turning up dead. The parents of the ones that were believed to still be alive got together, and sent out a distress letter to the Avengers begging for assistance.

"Do we know how these guys are getting to the kids?" You asked Sam while going over what little information the parents managed to rake up.

"No, some kids go to school and never make it home, while others are taken from their beds in the middle of the night." Sam answered with a tone of disapproval that caught your attention, making you glance up from the file to see what was wrong.

He was leaning up against the big brown rectangle table located in the center of the conference. His arms crossed over his chest with his right hand gripping his left forearm so tight. His veins were showing matching the ones forming on his forehead from the scowl on his face.

"Sam, is there something you want to get off your chest?" You closed the file and tucked under your arm giving him your undivided attention.

"I don't think you should be going on this mission alone. You'd be way too vulnerable considering the lack of information, and resources. This is most likely going to be an undercover job with you having to infiltrate whatever they got going on. You would be alone and in the dark, and help will be faraway if anything goes wrong."

Sam wasn't telling you anything that you didn't already know, but hearing him list all the dangers of the mission did open your eyes a bit more too. How bad the circumstances really were, but what other choice did you have?

"Sam we already got three bodies, five missing kids, and counting. These guys aren't going to slow down or stop anytime soon if someone doesn't do something. The police force over there is too corrupt and is choosing to turn a blind-eye to all this, and the government isn't willing to do anything either. I can't just sit around waiting for Bucky to get back from his mission, and everyone else either retired, lacks the experience, or they're too busy dealing with otherworldly threats. It has to be me and it has to be now" You told him. An aura of unwavering confidence and determination in the air radiating from your speech.

You and him held eye contact for two long minutes neither of blinking, or backing down. Until finally he released a sigh in defeat pushing off of the table to walk closer, and clap you on the shoulder.

"Fine you win you're free to go it's not like I could really stop you in the first place huh?"

"Not a chance" You commented.

"Just watch your back and stay vigilant if things get too bad. Get somewhere safe, call for backup, and just wait I'll drop everything and head your way." Sam instructed, and with the way he said it you knew this wasn't the first time he had given this warning to someone. He was probably having flashbacks from his time in the military. "Promise me you'll do that for me y/n."

"You have my word" You swore, holding out your pinky. He shook his head but nonetheless extended his own pinky finger to wrap around it yours. Until they were locked together "the mission gets too intense I'll retreat until reinforcements arrive. No playing hero even if I am one."

A small smile finally broke out on his face at your little joke as he pulled you into a tight hug. Afterwards the two of you finished going over the mission, and coming up with the best course of action.

A Small Town Located in Costa Rica One Week Later

It was no longer a miracle to you that whoever was behind the kidnappings were able to avoid capture. It had nothing to do with dirty cops, or an uncaring government system (even if it was still true). Instead the bad guys were just smart when picking their targets.

The town where the kidnappings were happening was small, and isolated just on the outskirts of a rainforest. There weren't any other civilizations for miles, and the population couldn't be made up of more than seven thousand people, or maybe even less. It was hard to tell as you wandered through the town. Your first couple of days there to feel the place out, and see if you could pinpoint sketchy people.

You did take the time out to meet with the parents who sounded the alarm for any additional information. They might have kept to themselves, or just stumbled upon recently. While no more kids had gone missing in the time span it took for you to arrive. Unfortunately one more of the kidnapped kids had turned up deceased. It shattered your heart seeing the little girl with no light in her eyes, or color in her face. A calm rage began to settle over you, taking up all the space in your heart where mercy used to be. You found yourself not caring what happened with these scumbags. Usually you did your best to avoid casualties on missions telling yourself everybody had a story. A reason as to why they turned out the way they did, and why they believed in doing things a certain way. But there was no compassion this time, dead or alive made no difference to you.

These people were preying on the vulnerable knowing the location, and very few people living here made this town an easier target. Rather than a big city that had a strong police force, and a higher crime rate worth paying attention to in the government’s eyes. This is the first sign of trouble this town had seen in almost fifty years. You had found out and they had never experienced something of this magnitude. The sheriff and his five officers didn't know what they were dealing with, or how to deal with it. He sent out letters pleading for help to the nearest city, but it would've taken months for them to get back to them. With no guarantee they would even send help, so they tried another shot in the dark.

The Avengers.

You felt even more sure now that taking on this mission was the right thing to do, and worth every risk. Infiltration was proving to be difficult without a clear list of suspects. The town would see a few stragglers come and go every now and then, and some were recurring faces. Returning to purchase a few goods, or tools because they were living off-grid in the forest, and needed to replenish their stock, or prepare for a storm. But none of them really stood out to the townspeople either, so you asked if any of them were new faces.

And finally struck gold because there was one new straggler who seemingly kinda just came out of nowhere. He arrived about two months ago, and by then the kidnappings were already active. So no one really thought to point a finger at him, but he was your best lead.

The sheriff put you up in an apartment built on top of the local hardware shop. It was owned and run by a nice little family who also lived in the apartment, but had enough room to spare a bedroom. Whenever the man came into town you always visited the store for a variety of supplies. He had yet to turn up your first week there, and you were losing patience. But the thought of wandering through the rainforest for him didn't seem like the right move.

On your tenth day there all the waiting paid off. You were up in the apartment with some sitcom playing on the TV. Neither you or the couple's six-year old son was watching. Instead the two of you were playing with a few of his action figures. The boy wanted to reenact the Battle of New York, and even though he limited alien figures. It still worked.

"So what happens now?" He asked after throwing the Iron Man figure off to the side. Representing when Tony disappeared into the blackhole with the missile.

You slapped your forehead remembering at his age he wouldn't have been born during the first battle. In what would turn into a war spread out across the universe took place. "Iron Man manages to fall back through the blackhole just in time before it closes." You grabbed the figure from the floor, and held it up high in the air ready to bring it down. "The Hulk has to catch him though because he's un-"

"He's here the strange man is here" His older sister comes in yelling, cutting you off, and startling her little brother. He dropped the Hulk figure in his hand.

She dashed over to pull on your arm. "Hurry, he's shopping faster than usual if you go out of the bank. You can pretend to stumble into him from there."

You maneuvered your way around the little girl, and knelt down so you were on eye level with her. "Alright kiddo I can take it from here stay up here with your little brother."

She pouted still wanting to help, but you shook your head no before the protesting could even start back up. "You were a good kid and one day you'll make a great hero. For now though I'll handle the bad guys, and you get to be a kid. You've done enough." You gave her a quick wink ruffling her hair.

The girl looked up with a wide and toothy grin, eyes lit up with pride. Your words would probably stick up with her for the rest of her life, and it was one of the small things in life that made your heart a little more whole. The daughter wandered over to continue to play with her little brother who kept the reenactment going, but was way off course by now. From the look of things Loki was trying to make an epic comeback locked into combat with Thor and Ironman.

You took off leaving the apartment, and rushed down the stairs into the hallway that led to the back door. Going right into the alleyway where you would position yourself waiting for the man to pass. Just like the daughter suggested, you went over your plan again in your head. As your nerves started to get bad. If your plan didn't work then you were going to have to resort to plan B. Which was a lot more riskier and dangerous.

It was evening time so the sun was still out dancing on the edge of the horizon. A few moments away from setting the dark orange mixing in with the indigo sky. The alleyway was shrouded in darkness so you went completely unseen hanging on the wall of the store building. The pathway though was lit up by the little light the sky had left to offer, so you were able to see the shadow of the man as he approached your hiding spot.

He wandered right past you, his eyes cast downward focusing on the screen of his cellphone. Not being aware of his surroundings was going to cost him. You extended your hand out towards him letting tiny tendrils of electricity flow from your fingertips. They creep up on the man from behind expanding away from each other. The trap constructed from electricity took form casting a shadow of its own. Maybe it was his instincts or just plain paranoia, but the man finally seemed to realize something was wrong. He looked up from his phone to glance over his shoulder, and his eyes went wide with fear. A tiny yelp managed to escape his lips as the tendrils wrapped around his body. Pulling him into its embrace forming a cocoon you yanked him into the alleyway. His muffled screams doing nothing to help him as a patch of electricity covered his mouth.

He squirmed in your power's embrace. You let the electricity dissipate giving him a bit more freedom. His hands and feet remained bound. He rested his head back on the brick wall staring as you finally walked over to where he could see you.

"Avenger" he spat angrily.

Yep that confirmed it. This was definitely your guy, only bad guys addressed you that way. If he was some scared civilian he would've pleaded for his life, and if he was a fan he would've started freaking out in excitement of being mistaken for a villain. You were surprised by the number of superhero fanatics who actually enjoyed being caught in this exact position because of a mix-up.

"Well you just answered my first question which means we can skip all the pointless denial, and get to the good stuff." You said crouching down in front of him. A sickly smile on your face with blue sparks dancing in your eyes.

"I've done nothing wrong" he lied.

You sucked your teeth. "No no no now let's not do that. You and I both know that's a lie."

He grinned scooting up a bit more, so he was sitting up now. "You can't prove anything."

You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath, and exhaling slowly. Usually you were level-headed and patience wasn't a virtue you struggle to uphold during interrogations. But any patience you had left evaporated when the body count went up. In a blink of an eye you were right on top of him with his body between your legs. You looked down at him with piercing eyes filled with anger. One of your hands closed into a tight fist, and on command his entire body spasmed as currents of electricity coursed through his body.

He arched his back high in the air screaming in pain. His cries carried well beyond the alleyway, and you made no attempt to mask them. The streets were empty with everyone already inside, and done for the day. It could only be seven-thirty at the latest, yet people were afraid to be out this late with their children. Because of this guy and whoever he worked with, this once peaceful and safe small town had become a nightmare for the people who called it home.

No one was going to rush to his rescue.

And after fifteen seconds of experiencing what it was like to be hit with fifty-thousand volts of electricity. The agony in his eyes started to be clouded with panic. As they danced around in desperation to see if there was another approaching shadow. He finally came to the realization

hat he was yours to do whatever you pleased to get the truth.

His cries started dying down into a mangled half-sobbing, half-choking noise. "Please" he managed to get out.

You opened your hand and the electrocution ceased. His body dropped to the ground, but the spasms continued as he tried to recover.

"Now as you can see I'm not exactly in the mood to let you jerk me around for ten minutes. I'm not about to play games spending an hour trying to outsmart you, and trick you into giving me the info I need. You're either going to tell me, or you're going to be in a lot of pain. It's really up to you because no one in this town will bat so much as an eye. If I torture you for the entire night these people want their kids, and their lives back. They've given me the authority to do whatever it takes to make that happen."

The erratic spasms had calmed down enough that his body was just shaking now. He had heard every single word, and no longer did he seem to be so confident or angry anymore. You leaned down so his face was only inches from yours. "So what's it going to be?"

His mouth opened but no words came out as he hesitated probably thinking about it. What his boss would do to him for snitching.

But his boss wasn't here and you'd bet your life that they weren't going to send in a rescue team. If he didn't return from his supply run. If anything they would pack everything up, and go on the run hoping he was done to tie up loose ends.

Your fist shot out striking him in the face. His head snapped back into the wall. He groaned in pain, shaking his head, and blinking at a rapid pace trying to gather his thoughts. "The kids' ' you demanded.

"Stop, I'll tell you where they are," he cried out as soon as he could.

You studied the condition he was in. Your tactics took a toll on his body, so he was definitely in pain. Every now and then he would jump a little bit, and the punch no doubt resulted in a headache. But he was functional and conscious so you grabbed him by the front of his shirt. He started kicking at the ground promising that he was going to cooperate. He assumed you were going to hurt him again.

You pulled him to his feet and the electricity bindings dissolved. "Take me to the kids."

He cocked his head to the side in confusion.

"I don't want you to tell me where they are. I want you to show me the way." You explained.

Two Hours Later

The man led deep into the rainforest which was vibrating with color during the play, but now at nightfall. It was descending into a void of darkness with only animalistic sounds to guide your way. The noises weren’t comforting here. Sometimes it was just a colony of frogs croaking in symphony together. Other times it was a guttural growl that had to belong to a big cat of some

kind. This rainforest was home to tigers, jaguars, and maybe leopards. You weren’t too sure about the last one, but you just hoped your powers would be fast enough if one came leaping out of the bushes, or maybe even attacked from above. You didn’t want to think of how the world would react to the headline “Avenger Mauled to Death By A Wildcat.” It would be such an unconventional way for you to die. Even in death your friends and possibly your lovers would never let you live it down. The brief thought of Ayo and Aneka passing through your mind brought a cascade of emotions to the surface. The last time the three of you saw each other right before you left for this mission was paradise all the way up to the end. Your final moment with your loved ones wasn't your best, and although part of you still felt like they were to blame for any harsh words exchanged. You couldn’t deny your own guilt in the part you no doubt played in the argument. Aneka was probably the one who could go blameless, considering she was only present for the end, and she had tried to play peacemaker. 

You were lying on your stomach with your face buried in the mountain of pillows on the bed. Ayo was beside you on her side facing you with an elbow propping her head up. Her other hand drew lines up and down your bare back under the covers. Her touch ghosting your skin with her light grazing to not wake you from your slumber. Aneka had gone to gather breakfast from one of the restaurants the three of you frequented a lot. Tonight was going to be your last with them as you were set to fly back home to take on a new mission, and it was decided today would be a lazy day. Ayo and Aneka somehow managed to get the day off with the promise no one would disturb them with any guard duties. Sam knew not to message your phone till the morning. 

“I wish you didn’t have to go so soon my love” Ayo whispered resting her head on your back. She would never admit out loud but since before her and Aneka saved you from those goons. She worried about you day and night whenever you were gone even if you weren’t on a mission. Before becoming an Avenger you were a Shield agent, and had been fighting bad guys for your entire life basically. Since you turned nineteen and over the years your list of enemies only got bigger and bigger. Who’s to say one of them wouldn’t just show up one day looking for vengeance. You were strong and powerful and knew better to not be aware of your surroundings. But still sometimes you exhausted yourself to the point where you couldn’t even sit up on your own, or collapsed without warning. If any of them caught you in that state it doesn’t matter how good you are you would be a goner. 

Ayo had grown accustomed to having you in your life, and it was hard to go about her day knowing each time she said goodbye to you might be the last. It might’ve taken Thanos to kill Natasha and Tony but the Avengers had so many close calls in the past. Not to mention the Avengers were always fighting some deadly foe on a regular basis. What if there was another Ultron or alien invasion? What if you didn’t come back going down in the midst of the battle. The thought brought despair to her heart. Why couldn’t you just stay here in Wakanda with her and Aneka where you would be safe. 

“Stay with me” she murmured, pressing a light kiss upon your back. Your body shivered at the warm feeling of her lips causing your eyes to finally flutter open. Just in time for another plea to leave her mouth and reach your ears. You barely made out the words in your groggy state, but knew what she was asking. 

“Oh how I wish I could Ayo” You answered back in a sleepy voice. 

“Just a little longer usana let someone else save the world.” She replied with a desperation in her voice you hadn’t heard before whenever she did this. 

“There is no one else” You shot back.

Ayo snorted but gave no words. 

You began to roll over causing her to lift her head from your back. You were now on your back looking down at her with confusion, but also a hint of frustration. This was a discussion you really didn’t feel like having, especially right now. “Is there something you want to get off your chest?” You asked, narrowing your eyes at her when she looked away. “Ayo.” 

Ayo pulled herself up so her back was resting up against the headboard. “You act as if you're the only superhero in the world. Like the world will implode with you around to save it.”

“The world might not implode but if I retire that will be one less family or person that will be saved. I’m not the only hero left but there aren't as many of us running around anymore. Not when you got people like Valentina in charge of government enhanced people. That woman doesn’t have anyone’s best intention in mind except the corrupt people in power. Sam, Bucky, and I are the only ones still trying to protect and help people who need it” You argued. 

“So every other Avenger is just doing what laying on a beach somewhere in Hawaii on a lifelong vacation” Ayo scoffed. 

“No but they don’t have the best interest of the little people in mind. Bruce is running around as a smart Hulk playing ambassador with other planets, and trying to anticipate the next Thanos level threat. Doctor Strange can’t be bothered with worldly problems, because he is too busy dealing with the world of mystical arts. He only gets evolved if a problem in his world spills into ours. Spider-Man is just trying to be your friendly neighborhood hero in New York. Rhodey is too busy being a military man shall I go on? If I retire Ayo, people will suffer and die.” 

“People will suffer and die anyway y/n you can’t save everyone” she blurted out. 

“Well sorry I can’t just turn my back on the rest of the world, and hide out in a country whose only looking out for their own people. That’s not my M.O.” You said with as much venom as you could. It struck a nerve as her eyes snapped to yours at the accusation or insult. It was a sore spot for just about everyone in Wakanda even though T’Challa had changed the way they did things, and opened up the country to the rest of the world to provide their resources. Every now and then someone would remind them of the hundreds of years that went by with them letting the rest of the world, especially neighboring countries suffer right under their noses. 

Her hand gripped your chin making you look up at her. “Apologize.” It was an order not a suggestion. 

“No you started it so you can apologize first” You told her by knocking her hand away. “What am I supposed to do all day if I retire? Anyway, play housewife to you and Aneka. While the two of you are out there getting action?” 

“I wasn’t saying you should retire, just go on less missions that’s all” Ayo murmured. A whimper threatening to escape her lips. It wasn’t supposed to go like this. 

“The world can’t afford to lose another hero. I’m either going to be an Avenger or not there is no between for me. I’m not going to be running around as a half-assed superhero.” You threw the covers off and swung your feet onto the carpeted floor. Ayo’s arms were wrapped around your waist with her face buried in your neck in an instant. 

“My love I’m sorry don’t go we can fix this” she pleaded finally changing her tone. But it was too late. You were agitated by the argument considering this wasn’t the first time it was brought up, and you were growing tired of having to defend yourself. You broke free of her grip so you could stand to dress yourself. The door was pushed open and Aneka walked in holding a bag with three separate plates of food. ““Zithandwa zam I’m home” she called out to the two of you in cheerful attitude. Then she looked up and the sight before her made her drop. 

Aneka moved with purpose, dropping the food on the bed and coming over to you, placing one hand on your hand, and bringing the other up to caress your cheek. You wanted nothing more than to lean into her touch, instead you tried to pull away. Her arm curled around your waist pulling your body to hers so there was no space left. Aneka wasn’t about to let you walk away without an explanation. 

“What happened to sithandwa sam?” She asked softly, pushing strands of hair behind your ear. 

“Nothing Ayo and I just had a disagreement okay.” 

Aneka nodded with a brief glance to Ayo before drawing her eyes back to you. She decided it would be easier to work the issue out with you first, Ayo second, and then all three of you could sit down and discuss things in a healthy manner. It would probably come as a surprise to others that Aneka was the more civil one in the relationship.

“Why don’t we go outside and get some fresh air, yeah” she suggested. 

“No I’m leaving” You refused. This wasn’t an argument you wanted to work out because it was recurring, and would just be a problem again later on. 

Aneka frowned. “I thought you were staying the night and leaving early in the morning.”

“I was but now it's just best that I go now alright. I love both of you alright but I’m leaving now” You insisted. 

“Y/N whatever she said to hurt you I’m pretty sure she didn’t mean it. Please stay” Aneka pleaded, hurt flashing in her eyes. “We need-” 

“What I need is some space and you’re not going to change my mind.” You said cutting her off as you finally managed to wrestle your way out of her grip. 

“When did you two become clingy?” You muttered under your breath heading for the door. 

Your last statement reached both of their ears, and the temperature in the room seemed to drop to below zero. At your cold attitude they had never seen this side of you, and it pained both of them. Aneka more Ayo because she truly did nothing wrong, and as if you could sense how wrong you were. You paused at the door with your hand resting on the knob, your back to them, and tears trying to spill out. Without another word you turned back around to walk over to Aneka, and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. You did the same to Ayo and then you were gone. 

A hissing noise and the feeling of something rubbery slipping past your ankles made you bite down a yelp, and step to the side avoiding the snake that was either running from you, or just making its way past you. It had to be a snake and you were just grateful the thing didn’t choose to bite you. In a place like this you were pretty sure everything was poisonous. 

What you hated about the way you left things with Ayo and Aneka was now you were wondering. What was the state of your relationship with them? Would they want you back after this mission was over, or would they reject you for choosing the life of Avenger over them. Part of you considered the idea of just taking on another mission after this one, and avoiding going back to Wakanda altogether. 

“We’re here” the man said, coming to a stop in front of you. 

You walked ahead of him to take a peek beyond the bushes, and although it was hard to make out in the dark of the night. You could see a large industrial-like building that blended in perfectly with the texture of the forest. You spotted a single door that had to be at the back of the building. That would be your point of entry. 

“Am I free to go?” He asked in a timid voice. 

You turned back to him with a raised eyebrow that he couldn’t even see. “Is that a trick question?” Before he could muster an reply your hand shot out releasing a stream of electricity that slammed into his body, and sent him flying back to the ground. He was still breathing but was now unconscious. 

The building had no type of security or surveillance in sight. No bodyguards, no cameras, no guard dogs, or even outside lights. Either these guys were stupid or just overconfident because the base was located in a hard to find and isolated location. It would lead to their downfall if you moved with caution approaching the door that was locked. When you tested it out, picking a lock was child’s play, and two seconds later you were slipping into the building letting the door slam shut behind you. 

The door led to you a long stretch of hallway that was just as empty as the courtyard. No doors along the hallway or cameras to worry about dodging, but the lights were on. It was quiet as you strained your ears trying to make out the tiniest of sounds. Was it possible the guy led to a decoy building, or maybe a trap. Either way it was too late to turn back now you set off in search of the kids. 

The hallway took you to another hallway, and after that another one you were starting to think you entered some backward maze. Until finally after ten minutes of wandering you picked up on some distant voices. The current hall led cutoff into an open room that held other pathways to different wings. Standing in the empty space strapped with machine guys were two men dressed up in all black camo. 

They were standing on either side with their back to you chatting in a language you didn’t understand. You acted fast once reaching them, slamming their heads into one another. They let out sharp gasps of pain, and went down. One rolled over onto his back, hands scrambling to get a good grip on his gun. Before he could set it up to aim you grabbed a handful of his shirt and brought your fist down into his face. His head snapped to the side but he was still conscious, and his gun was now pointed at your chest.

This time your fist crackled with blue sparks when you punched him, and he was knocked out cold. The other one was on his feet rushing across the room towards a red button. You crouched down, placing both of your hands on the floor palm first. Electric waves danced along the floor reaching him before he could reach the alarm, and his body spasmed as he cried out for the shock. You took the time to drag both of them out of immediate sight into the hallway, and unstrapped their guns not only to take them apart. But to use the black straps to hogtie them, and then you were off checking one door. 

First glance told you it was the control room and with a keycard you got off one of the guards. You got into the room with no trouble and was surprised to find it empty. Okay whoever was in charge of this whole operation was severely understaffed. You threw yourself into the chair and studied the screen to see if the room the kids were being held in was on here. The process would move along a bit smoother and faster if you had an idea of. What direction to go in next instead of wandering around aimlessly. Running the risk of being discovered and having to fight your way to them and out. If you could save yourself the trouble you would like too. 

Upon inspecting all video footage on the screen there was only one room with potential. The room was void of light but if you looked hard enough you could make out some movement, and all the other rooms were visible. So you knew none of them were holding the kids. You didn’t want to leave these guys unscathed but the number one priority right now was escaping, and getting the kids back home. You left the control room and took the pathway that went to the east wing of the building. You came across another guard lounging in a chair with it pushed back leaning up against the wall. It was a woman with a high ponytail watching YouTube videos on her cell phone completely unaware of your presence. You crept up and kicked the chair from under her. Her butt hit the floor as she yelped reaching for her handgun, but you gave her a good shock knocking her unconscious. 

You moved further into the building taking a left into a short and narrow hallway leading to a silver steel door. The keycard granted you access. You were careful pushing the door at a slow pace. Not wanting to startle the kids on the other side as they were probably already terrified. The light from the hallway washed into the room giving you a view of bunk beds running alongside both walls of the decent-sized room. All of the beds were empty, and when you stepped into the room you saw why. 

Three kids were gathered together in the far right corner of the room huddled close to each other. There was a little girl who couldn’t be any older than eight-years old with long blonde hair that was a bit unkempt. Holding onto her hand was an even younger girl with tanned-brown skin, and messy black hair. She was maybe three or four. Hovering in front of them was an older boy with dark-skin and short locs. He could be nine or ten years old, and was obviously the oldest out of all the kids. At least that’s what you assumed till your ears picked the smallest of footsteps coming up on from behind. 

You ducked just in time as a metal rod whistled over your head. It swung with a great amount of force if you hadn’t dodged. You’d been laid out on the floor right now. You spun around catching the rod mid-swing this time, and ripping it away from the assailant. This kid was standing in the direct path of light pouring into the room. He was tall with light-brown skin, and silky black hair that fell into his dark green eyes. This one was definitely the oldest and the leader. 

“You’re not taking any of them. I’ll go but leave them alone” he demanded pointing a finger at you. The kid had guts. 

You dug into the side pocket of your suit to pull out a few rolled up pictures. After going through them you found the one with the boy in front of you in it. His name was Diego Rodriguez and his parents were the ones who formed the group, and came up with the idea of reaching out to the Avengers. Their boy was one of the few who went missing in the beginning, and while they were grateful their boy’s body never turned up somewhere. They were still worried about what was being done to him. He was thirteen with his birthday passing two months ago. 

The little girl's name was Annie. The only family she had left was her adult sister who stepped in. When the parents died in a plane crash on their way back from a couple’s retreat. But the other two kids weren’t found in any of the photos given to you, leaving a few options. They were taken from the streets, and no one even noticed their disappearance, which didn’t seem plausible with how close everyone in this small town was. Two their parents hadn’t been part of the group, or maybe didn’t give you pictures which was still unlikely. As you took another glance at them, and ran all the faces you spent days memorizing when you met the parents. The kids didn’t resemble any of the other adults. Third and final option: these kids were taken from somewhere else and are a long way from home. It didn’t matter you were going to get them all out of here, and back home with their families where they belonged. 

“Diego right that’s your name” You finally addressed the oldest of the bunch. He frowned at the use of his real name. The person in charge probably gave them fake names or numbers to try to erase any connection to their old life. 

“Why are you calling me that?” He asked a bit confused but you could hear the smallest hint of hope in his voice. 

“So you know that you can trust me” You replied holding up the picture with him and his parents in it. Diego let his arms drop to his sides and he straightened his body out of the fighting stance. “Your parents sent me here to get all of you okay.” 

He snatched the picture from your hand, turning around to hold it into the light. His attention was focused solely on the image of his fingers grazing over his parents' faces. Tears welled up in his eyes as he let out a cry of happiness. “Ma and Da didn’t forget about me.” 

He sounded so relieved yet broken, and it made you want to break down into tears yourself. You wanted to take the boy in your arms and reassure him. There was never a chance he could be forgotten. Not a universe out there where his parents wouldn’t exhaust every option before beating the walls down themselves to find him. You wanted all these kids to know that because hearing his confirmation made them perk up a bit, and come out from the corner to crowd him to see the picture. The other boy, and older girl looked back at you with a silent plea. 

“Are you guys from around here?” You asked both of them. 

The boy spoke up “naw you were taken before they got to this place. Where I’m from it's really hot and sunny all the time you know.” 

“Yeah I know” You agreed, deciding you could narrow down the search later.

“I’m from New York,” the girl said, fiddling with her fingers nervously. 

“Well I’m an Avenger and I’m here to take all of you back home, and beat up the bad people who took you.” You said crouching down. Diego turned back around his eyes wide with excitement. 

“You are an Avenger and I almost knocked you out man I’m so sorry” he exclaimed.

You waved him off. “Don’t worry about it you did good kid I’m going to need your help getting these guys out of here. Because we gotta move now and fast.”

“What about the guards? They’re mean and like to hit us with sticks” the girl clarified. 

“Already taken care of them which is why we have to go before they wake up.” There probably were more located in the parts of the building you didn’t bother searching, but you would take care of them when the problem arose. No one was going to lay a finger on either of these kids with you around. 

“Alright I want all of you to stay behind me and go where I go alright. Diego you’re going to bring up the rear.” You retrieved the metal rod and held it out to him. “If anyone shows up, take them out okay.” 

Diego took it from you with a nod, and a look of determination on his face. You don’t know what they put these kids through, but whatever it was surviving it this long had aged Diego up a couple of years mentally. 

You gathered the youngest girl up in your arms, placing her on your hip, and led the kids out of the room. In case things got bad and you guys needed to run you didn’t want to have to worry about her falling, or freezing up. The other three seemed to be aware of the stakes here and ready to follow wherever orders you gave them. The little girl wrapped her arms around your neck resting her head on your shoulder. The journey back was fast and quite uneventful. No guards came popping out of nowhere. No alarm went off and all the guards you knocked out were still unconscious and tied up where you left them. When the group reached the twisting hallways one of the hogtied guards did wake up in a panic.  Diego brought the rod down on his head without hesitation putting him back to sleep. 

You winced at the sickening crunch sound that it made upon impact. For a second Diego kept the rod raised in the air as if he was bringing it down again. The murderous rage in his eyes told you he had thought it back more than once. While you didn’t blame him in the long run it would only make his nightmares of this place even more worse. He managed to pull himself away and moved along with the rest of y’all. 

Five more minutes and all of you reached the courtyard outside, and the kids were ready to rejoice, but you kept them focused on the task at hand. The hike back to town was going to take a few hours, and it wouldn’t be easy going through the forest, especially at night. 

“There’s a road we could take,” Diego suggested.

None of the kids wanted to venture into the rainforest, and you couldn’t say that you blamed them. “Is the road safe?”

He shrugged, “I’m not sure I think they are used for transporting cargo and stuff, but I don’t think anything comes at night.” 

You mulled it over weighing the risk of both options. On one hand you remembered the path back to the town through the rainforest by heart. But on another the rainforest held even more dangers, and you were with kids anything could go wrong. The road would be clear and straightforward, while y’all would be out in the open. You would probably be able to see any incoming threats, and the kids could hide in places easier to find instead of having to scramble. 

“We’ll take the road to show me” You told him. Diego nodded and started walking in the direction of the front of the building, and your guard went up instantly expecting it to be more like a fortress. 

“If we move along the trees we won’t trigger anything” he whispered to you. 

Y’all stayed along the edge of the forest using the bush and trees for cover to get around the building. The front of the building was lit up with overhead lights like the ones they used in football stadiums. The yard was filled with combat jeeps, a few dune buggies modified for military operation, and cameras. Diego took a left turn going deep into the forest, and the older girl gripped your hand tighter as you followed. Her name was Chloe, and the other boy's name was Kai. He was up ahead behind Diego. Finally you broke out into a clearing onto a dirt road lit

up by the moon shining down on it guiding the way home. 

As the five of you started to trek back to town staying on the side of the road just in case danger came showing up out of nowhere. You were baffled at how easy this whole thing had been, and was starting to wonder if there was some type of catch. When it happened you guys had reached a point in the road where it was going uphill. As you reached the top with the youngest girl still in your dead arms now asleep. The dirt on the road transformed from a rough and rocky surface to a texture so smooth. The other three kids started to slide back down the hill. 

Chloe screamed, arms flailing around in the air as she tried to maintain her balance. She was closest to you so it took no effort to grab her by the hand and pull the rest of the way. You set Annie down beside her and took off sliding down on the hill on your side. One hand braced against the ground to try and slow your descent. The other one held out to Kai and then he and Diego were floating in the air. You cried out in panic till they started moving upward to the top of the hill. 

“Oh yeah I’m telekinetic by the way” Diego called out to you. He threw his hand out towards you, but your attention shifted to a bulky dark figure waiting at the bottom. He had to be the one responsible for the ambush, and you had to take care of him. You felt your body being lifted to the air but shouted out “NO.” 

Diego and Kai had made it to the top safe and sound by now. Chloe and Annie hovering behind them. Diego let you drop back to the ground with brows furrowed in confusion. “You guys go ahead without me, just follow the road till it takes you home, and don’t trust anyone who’s not me. Diego, you're in charge.”

“Wait you’re not coming” Kai shouted with a fearful expression.

“I’m not leaving you” Diego insisted 

“I’m going to take care of this guy when I’m done with him. I’ll catch up with you guys, but I need all of you to keep moving. I promise” You swore. 

Your words seemed to do the trick and with one last parting glance Diego began shoving Kai forward, and barking for them to run. The kids disappeared over the hill and you just prayed no one else was sent after all of you.

 You kept sliding down the path, and right before reaching the end. You planted your feet, bending your legs at the knee, and pushed off launching your body into the air. Your body twisted in the air as you sailed over the figure’s head as you were coming down. You charged a bolts of electricity up, and sent them flying at the figure. 

The person held up his hand and a wall shot up from the ground shielding him from your attacks. As your bolts slammed into it before bursting into tiny little blue sparks you landed on your feet and went skidding backward. You dug a hand into the ground as your body came to a halt. 

“Who the hell are you?” You seethed. 

The person yanked their hood off revealing it was a light-skinned man with a bald-head. A sinister smile played on his lips as he answered your question. “I’m the muscle.”

“Oh yeah where were you when I was breaking in?” 

“I guard the front, no one really watches the back.”

“Shame and stupid really most people use the backdoor when they’re sneaking into a place where they aren’t wanted.”

“Stop trying to stall. I'm bringing those kids no matter how far they run” He yelled.

“Yeah buddy I’m afraid that’s not going to happen while I’m around” You declared. 

“You might be an Avenger but you’re at a major disadvantage sweetheart. Your elemental power is electricity and mine is earth or haven’t you noticed.” The man did a circling motion with his hand, and rocks were lifted into the air answering his call. The rocks formed a circle and started going around into a spinning motion in front of him. “Earth triumphs electricity.” 

He was right. Basic science told you as much and while you hadn’t fought many others enhanced with powers on the same spectrum as yours. This wasn’t a fight you could afford to lose. “I still like my odds” You shouted back letting the electricity crackle up and down both of your arms. 

“Alright then let’s get this show on the road.” Those would be the last words exchanged between the two of you as you launched a current of electricity at him. This time instead of a wall he the rocks still twirling around him molded themselves together, and took the shape of a circular shield. The electric blast slammed into the shield causing a ripple as tiny rock pieces crumbled to the ground, but ultimately the shield held. 

You shifted to the side launching more electric bolts at rapid speed aiming for his blind slide. The earth user spun his body around managing to keep pace with you, and block all your attacks. So you went low flinging an electric rope construct at his leg. The strategy worked as the rope wrapped around both of his ankles constricting until his legs were forced together. You gave a harsh pull using all your strength to pull his feet out from under him, and send him down to the ground on his back.

He let out a groan on impact as his shield crumbled into dust with the loss of focus. You took the opening electricity shooting out of your outstretched hands to make direct contact with him. This attack was a bit stronger than what you usually used, wanting to end this as fast as possible. 

“Arrrghhh” he groaned as his body convulsed from the electric shock. A little more than sixty-thousand voltage spread throughout his body. His hands balled into fists and his eyes flew open. The ground opened up beneath him and sucked him in. 

You cease your attack, eyes scanning the area waiting for him to reappear. It was an impressive move tunneling underground if there was a conductor present you would’ve pulled the same one. There was movement on your left and you swung out a sparking fist connecting with nothing but dust, and the enhanced reappeared right in front of you slamming a rock-covered fist into your stomach. The air rushed out of your lungs with an accompanying crunch sound. He definitely broke a rib or two on impact. You gasped for air, your powers shutting down momentarily. 

He wasted no time in taking control over the fight bringing his foot up to land a harsh kick in your upper chest. The force sent you flying back to the ground rolling a few feet away. Your breath was ragged and painful as you tried to put air back into your lungs. But he wasn’t giving you recovery time appearing right above you with his fist drawn back ready to land another hard blow. You scrambled backward barely dodging him as his fist struck the ground where your face had been just minutes ago creating a decent size crater. 

You called upon your power again resisting the pain in your abdomen, and created a giant ball of electricity throwing it at him. The electrical ball sailed towards him with great speed, and he started swinging his arms in a sweeping motion. A dust storm started to pick up, and you watched as your ball of electricity began to falter. By the time it reached them the swirling dust particles were so bad you couldn’t even make the man’s figure out anymore, and your attack evaporated into the air. You cursed under your breath backing up into the cover of the trees hoping he would follow. The farther you led him away from the road the better because that way even if he did manage to win. Then it wouldn’t matter because the more distance between him and the kids the better chance they had at finding help. 

“Oh come on Avenger we were just getting started” he yelled chasing after you. 

Knowing he was going to pursue you descended farther into the forest at a faster pace. Trying to formulate a plan because while it pained you to admit this guy knew it was right. He had the power advantage, and none of your attacks were going to have any effect unless you managed to catch him off guard first. And that wasn’t a solid fighting strategy. 

You sought solace behind a tall and wide tree letting your body sink to the ground. As a thousand ideas ran through your head one memory managed to push its way to the forefront. 

You gritted your teeth as you held the stream of electricity trying to overpower the lightning bolt clashing with your power. Finally there was an explosion as both attacks canceled each other out, and you were thrown back to the ground. 

When the smoke cleared you glared up at the Thunder God hovering above you with a grin. “Another round y/n what do you say?” Thor proposed. Of course he remained unscathed from the explosion. Well here you were kneeling on the ground breathing heavily from overexerting your powers with a sore body. 

“No Thor this is pointless I can’t control, summon or manipulate lightning” You exclaimed. “So please stop with the spontaneous lightning attacks because all I can do is try to counter it, and I’m not sure if I have the strength to stop the next one.

Thor let out a grumpy huff at your refusal to his training method. “Lightning is only an extension of your ability to control electricity. I mean there are the same elements you should be able to call upon just as much as I can. Lady Y/N can’t you see how close we are to unlocking your power’s true potential.”

“I get how you can think and yes I’m pretty sure I’m immune to dying of a lightning strike. I think that’s the only advantage I have when it comes to lightning. I don’t there’s the huge reservoir of untapped power lying dormant inside of me Thor. It would be cool but it's not plausible” You told him with a shrug. 

“How can you be so sure?” Thor asked in genuine curiosity. 

“Because I probably would’ve unlocked it a long time ago” You answered a bit unsure. 

“Just remember Lady Y/N sometimes we must reach our breaking point and exhaust all the current power inside of us to reach new heights.” 

You played those words in your eyes over and over again, drifting up to the dark calm sky. A few clouds were out and you knew from testing it out in the past. A few electric beams launched into the sky could summon a thunderstorm which would produce lightning. While you never tried to control lightning again after that day of failing to do it. The idea was a bit more appealing now with each passing second where you could hear the earth user trudging through the bush getting closer to your hiding spot.

The beams would give away your location, and it would take a minute or two for the thunderstorm to come. But it’s not like you had a better idea, and this one wasn’t really concrete considering it was a shot in the dark. And held a lot of risk with you using all the power you had left to conjure up a storm for the record books. If this didn’t work you were as good as dead, and those kids would be taken again. 

You took a deep breath gathering up all the power inside of you, and summoning into your hands. In the end you had generated a big enough electrical shock to power a city the size of Los Angeles for weeks. Not wasting another second you climbed to your feet, and sent a giant beam of blue electricity into the sky where it seemingly disappeared into the endless deep space. You kept pushing, determined to empty yourself out behind a few branches snapped under a foot. He was right on top of you now but still you kept the attack going almost out, and when his hand wrapped around your shoulder swinging your body around to face him.

You tried to come up with a witty remark to stall him while the electricity worked its magic on the weather. But he wasn’t having as all you could manage was a weak sigh. His fist struck you hard in the face with a nasty right hook. Black spots appeared in your vision as he struck you again with another one. Your body sagged but the man kept you upright with a toothy grin.

“Why the hell would you do that now you’re just defenseless. A jab to the stomach.

“Powerless.” A blow to the nose.

“Useless” he sneered kneeing you in the stomach making you double over wrapping your arms around your midsection. This time he let you drop to your knees, your face bruised and battered. You don’t think you had ever taken such a bad beating in your entire lifetime, and you were prepared to just wave the white flag. 

When thunder boomed in the sky, and a few droplets fell from the sky landing on your skin. The Heavens heard your desperate pleas and answered. Lightning flashed with more thunder following in its wake. 

“How would I control lightning anyway? Like what is it like?” You questioned Thor after the training session was over. The two of you were lounging in the Tower with snacks. 

“Ahhh you don’t control lightning my friend you call out to it, and guide it. Lightning is a magnificent power source that can’t be tamed like a wild horse. You can only let it strengthen you and guide it.” 

His answer didn’t make sense back then but it made sense now as the lightning flashed again. You could feel the waves of power radiating off every bolt. 

“What was the purpose of this little thunderstorm?” The man asked you again, pulling you to your feet by the front of your shirt. You grinned, spitting out blood. “I was leveling the playing field.”

He frowned, not catching on till the hairs on the back of his neck shot up along with all of his other body hair. He had just enough time to shove you away and summon a barrier made of earth as a lightning bolt answered your call and struck your entire body lighting up the entire forest in white-hot flashing light. All of your power was restored and when you let run through your veins pushing it right back out aiming for the barrier. 

Chunks of the rock barrier were knocked away as a barrage of lightning strikes fell upon it. Creating an opening for a bolt of lightning to come down and strike the inside. A scream of agony filled the air as the barrier exploded. The earth user was on his knees shivering. 

“How do you feel about my odds now?” You taunted him. Your entire body was crackling with electricity and it was almost overwhelming. Lightning danced in the sky waiting for you to guide it again. 

He let out a maniacal laugh pushing himself back to his feet. “Okay now this just got interesting but I still got the upper hand Avenger.” He threw both of his arms out and a tree root wrapped around your ankle and pulled you down. He was taking a play out of your gamebook. You leapt to your feet and a circular disk slammed into your stomach, and sent you flying back into the air. Until your back made contact with another tree with another wave of agony flowing throughout your body. 

You held out your hand and two lightning strikes targeted the area around your enemy and he rolled away from one. Throwing up a small shield for the other but it wasn’t enough to withstand the strike which tore through it. The attack was weakened a bit making it easier for him to remain conscious and alive again. You struggled to your feet and started limping away to get out of the forest back to the road. The last thing you wanted to do was start a fire with your lightning attacks. This new power was great but unstable, and once it was unleashed there was no containing the aftermath. The rain was coming down a bit heavier now drenching your clothes, and blocking your vision as water droplets held onto your eyelashes. 

“Avenger stop running” the man roared. This guy had to be on steroids or something to still be so pumped. You were running off pure adrenaline right now once it expired your body was going to collapse. 

The road came into view and the man had followed trekking through the forest at a much faster pace. He summoned more circular desks and sent them hurling at you. Your movements were sluggish but still you dodged each attack throwing out a bolt of electricity here and there with his guard down. Some of them struck him each blow slowing him down a bit more. The two of you traded attacks back and forth for a while neither gaining the upper hand. Until your foot slipped in the muddy ground and one of his discs caught you in the head as you went down. You lost consciousness for a solid minute or so. 

When you came to the man was hovering above his body casting a menacing silhouette in the raging storm. He held something long in his hand and realization hit you a millimeter of a second too late. As he brought the rock spear up and sent it hurtling down into your midsection. Your eyes widened as the spear pierced your skin and kept going as he pushed it in deeper until the tip came out of your back where it connected with the ground beneath you again. Trapping you right where you lay and you gaped at the sight of the weapon sticking out of your body. Your brain couldn’t even register the pain, and blood garbled in the back of your throat. 

You coughed it up, some of it coating your mouth. 

“It was fun, Avenger but this is the end of the road for you. Thanks for giving me a real challenge but even with that lightning move. You still weren’t strong enough.” The man didn’t sound like he was gloating. He meant every single word and as the rain droplets pelted the ground. 

You took notice of the sound running water the storm had produced enough room to form large puddles of water. And you lifted your head to glance at his feet to see the one on your left was in a puddle. Your hand didn’t need to reach only a small electrical current. 

You chuckled through the pain with a small smile causing the man to shake his head. “What’s so funny?”

It took you a few moments but you managed to choke out an answer. “After pushing me to my extent and beyond you’re going to die by electrocution.” 

He tilted his head to the side with confusion, and scoffed in disbelief. It would be his downfall as a tiny trail of electricity made contact with the water his foot was in. It wouldn’t seem like it but you poured more than a hundred thousand volts into that tiny current, and all you needed was ten thousand to truly kill him. His body spasmed for a few seconds as the volts ran from his foot up into his entire body spreading to his heart bringing it to a stop. His cries died down as his body fell backward hitting the road with a splash. 

It was over. 

Your body was still in blinding pain and it was a miracle you were still conscious especially when all you wanted to do was rest now. You blinked trying to keep your bearings but the downpour was still bad. For a second you could swear Tony and Natasha were standing right above shaking their heads. 

“Come on Sparkatcus you can’t go out like this, not really a worthy death if you ask me” Tony said. 

Natasha shoved his shoulder. “What kinda pep talk is that Tony?” she reprimanded him with a glare. He held up his hands backing away. The redhead knelt down and reached a hand down to pat your cheek. 

“He is right though y/n you can’t go out like this. You have unfinished business to take care of then if you want to rest you can do that.” 

You opened your mouth to ask how when you knew the kids had to be safe by now. They had to be this couldn’t all be for nothing. 

Nat raised a single eyebrow at you and nodded her head at your right wrist. You looked over to see your kimoyo beads and it struck you that Ayo and Aneka were waiting for you to return. From this very mission so the three of you could finally fix things. But you weren’t sure if you were going to be able to make it home now, but you could make one last call. Both of them deserved an apology at least. 

“See you in a minute y/n or maybe not” Natasha said waving. “I’d rather you stay alive a bit longer.”

“I second that notion,” Tony agreed.

They were gone.

Had you hallucinated them or did your best friend’s spirits really come to you in your time of need? You brought a hand up with an electrical aura settled around it, and sliced clean through the rock. The top half fell over to the side and with two excruciating heaves you pulled your body free of the back half. Blood came gushing out of the gaping hole in your chest, and the significant loss made standing impossible. 

You rolled over to your side with your eyes closed, and breathing ragged. “Griot you there?” You whispered.

“Yes I am here y/n your vitals are dropping at a severe rate. You’re in critical condition, perhaps I should send your coordinates to Sam Wilson or Ayo.”

“Yeah you do that afterwards, call Ayo and Aneka for me and put us on a three-way.” 

“I wouldn’t recommend speaking too much y/n you must preserve your strength. You don’t have a lot of time left.” The A.I warned you.

“I know Griot but I need to tell them something important in case you know. Call them please” You begged. 

“Calling Ayo and Aneka now.” 

The beads vibrated as the ringing noise filled the air. It rang and rang until eventually it became obvious neither of them were going to pick up.

“Shall I call them again y/n” Griot asked.

“Yes” you croaked tears clouding your vision or was it the rain. You didn’t know anymore. 

Wakanda Three Hours Earlier 

“Yo check it out what’s that” one of the Doras shouted pointing at the sky. The other Doras gathered around to see what she was referring to. 

Ayo let out an exasperated sigh already knowing what or more like who it was. She looked up to see a blue dot coming in fast, heading straight for the training grounds. Aneka landed right in front of her and her blue mask retracted revealing her beautiful scowling face. 

“What is it now, my love?” Ayo asked, sending a sharp look at the girls. It was enough as all of them got back to training. 

“Why are your beads off?” Aneka asked in an accusatory tone.

“They aren't, I'm just not wearing them,” Ayo told her, bracing herself for the argument. The two of them had been arguing a lot since you left. She hated it. 

“Why not?” Aneka pushed.

“Because I’m in charge of training today and King M’Baku demands to see massive improvement in the younger Doras. I need to focus no distractions” Ayo explained, resting her hand on Aneka’s cheek. 

She didn’t jerk away which was a major improvement. “So now I’m a distraction.”

“Usana no for Bast’s sake don’t do this. Not now please” Ayo begged, wrapping her around her lover’s waist. She pressed her forehead to Aneka’s and let out a tired sigh. “Please do not argue today, tonight, tomorrow, or ever. I can’t fight with you anymore.”

Aneka was overcome with guilt with how tired her beloved sounded. Two weeks had gone by since your departure and when Aneka found out what caused the disagreement that sent you running. She was a little more upset with Ayo than usual as she had warned her that asking you to retire from being a hero wouldn’t go over well. Therefore she hadn’t been making these past few days easy on Ayo picking a fight at every given chance, and giving her the cold shoulder when the two were alone. 

She could see now that Ayo had suffered more than enough and needed a break. “I’m sorry sithandwa sam. It's just what if y/n calls I have to take the suit out for combat training with the new upgrades. She won’t be able to reach me.” 

“Oh Aneka, it has been fourteen days of nothing but silence from her. If she hasn’t called by now then she’s not planning on it. We’ll speak with her when she returns” Ayo said, voice filled with despair. 

“Y/N do you wish for me to call again” Griot asked again for the third time.

You almost went but held on with the hope that Ayo or Aneka would finally answer, but they didn’t. Your eyelids were growing heavier by the second you couldn’t hold on much longer your fingers were slick with blood. From you trying to slow down the bleeding but of course your attempts failed. 

“No, just record a message for me alright. Send it to both of them when I’m done” You whispered in a hoarse voice. 

“Recording now goes on.”

“Hey guys I know it's been a while and if both are ignoring my calls. I’ll admit it I deserve it after the way I left both of you. Neither of you deserved that, especially Ayo when you were only expressing your worry for me. I have no idea what it's like to be on the outside constantly waiting for someone I love to come back from a dangerous mission.” You paused to take in a ragged breath before going on. 

“I owe both of you an apology not just for what I said, but for breaking a promise. I promised both of you I’d always come back home safe and sound, but I’m not making it home this time guys. I’m sorry for everything, and for having to say goodbye this way. I love both of you with everything in me and I want you to know. These past few months with you two have been the best moments of my life. I’ll cherish them forever and I don’t want to die because my heaven is here with you two. Death might be peace for some, for me it's punishment. I should've been better to both of you. 

I called you clingy Aneka but right now I wish you were to cling to me.” Your words were cut with a harsh coughing fit. Your throat was on fire, and it hurt to talk but you pushed through the pain. “It hurts so much but I think the pain is starting to fade away. That’s not a good sign is it?” 

You went quiet for a few seconds before uttering your last words. “I love you Ayo. I love you Aneka, and I always will, even in the next life.”

“Is that the end y/n” Griot asked. 

You managed a meek nod hoping the A.I. could somehow sense your movement, and would send the message. It wasn’t darkness coming to take you, instead a flash of white light filled your vision, and in the distance you swear you could hear a peaceful melody being hummed. It was calling you, and you wanted nothing more than to find it. Your wrist was shaking, no vibrating, someone else was trying to reach out to you.

“Y/N you have an incoming call, do you wish to answer?” Griot asked, sounding desperate.

You opened your mouth to answer but the hymn got louder, drowning out the vibrating on your wrist that you couldn’t even feel anymore. A sense of peace swept over you washing all the pain away, and beckoning you to follow it. All you had to do was close your eyes and let it take the lead. Somewhere faraway someone else was still trying to get to you, but it was too late. You shutted your eyes for the last time, and answered the call of the angels. The white light faded away into darkness but it only lasted for a brief second. 

Epilogue 

In the darkness of the night three young kids snuck out of their well-guarded town that had become a fortress of solitude in their absence. The oldest boy Diego led his companions back into the forest where they had just emerged from a few hours earlier. 

One of them voiced her concern “this isn’t a good idea D we should head back” Chloe insisted looking over her shoulder at every small noise. She was scared but Diego said he needed her, and after everything he did for her in the scary prison. She trusted him more than anyone else in her life. He wouldn’t let her take them back. 

“The Avenger didn’t come back, we have to make sure she’s okay” Diego told her waving his flashlight along the road.

“Exactly why this is a bad idea dude if she didn’t make it out then. It probably means they sent you know who” Kai argued. 

“She could be hurt and need our help. Look, we’re just going back where she left us to see if she’s there. If not we’ll head back to town now Kai do you smell anything?”

“Bro its a rainforest I smell a lot of things”

“Okay smell for something more significant like blood” 

“Blood would mean she’s dead” Chloe cried out clutching her shirt tightly between her little fingers. 

“Not just injured, you know who could be dead” Diego reassured her. He hoped he wasn’t leading them to your dead body. You were an Avenger. You had to be okay. 

“I bet she ripped his head off,” Kai said, a bit too excited, sniffing the air, and his eyes widened as if he struck gold. The boy took off racing past Diego who yelled for him to slow down. “I found her, come on guys, we're going to save an Avenger.”

Diego grabbed Chloe by the hand and followed behind Kai who came to an abrupt halt just a few feet up ahead. When he reached the spot he understood why just a few feet away you were lying on your side with a pool of blood beneath your body. You were too still. 

Diego took charge covering the rest of the distance dropping to his knees beside your body. He rolled you over onto your back, and gasped at the gaping hole in your chest, but your body was still warm to touch. “Chloe come here.” 

The blonde girl stayed rooted in place by Kai unable to process what she was seeing. His voice hadn’t got through to her till he barked “now Chloe she needs you.” She walked over at a slow pace unsure if her powers could do you any good. 

“Bro she’s dead healing ain’t going to work” Kai voiced what he was thinking aloud. 

Diego fixed him with a hard look before guiding Chloe down beside him. “She hasn’t been dead for long, maybe your healing could revive her enough to give her a fighting chance. Come on Chloe, we owe it to her to try.” 

Chloe nodded and placed one hand just over the bloody hole in your chest, and the other over your heart. A bright light emitted from her hands as a feeling of warmth flowed through her, and she pushed into you. 

In the distance there was a flash of lightning neither kid took notice of. 

Tag List: @kofforever @greek-freak101 @izrinmabel1 @verachii @mminiri @wandas-nose-scrunch @unsatisfiedanddisappointed @chatitajens @shuris3leg @aiden-presscott @deliciousfestsalad @zayswriting @mbakuetshurisprincess @ceaseanddecease @riribabymomma @como731 @liltigeryuki @readingaddict1001 @someobliviousgirl @marsfunzon22 @urfavvmiyahh @shinsousliya @purple-nugget @alistair-mooncrest @unreasonablysapphic @justariellove

[wedonthaveawhile]

The Serpents Hold // Chapter Sixteen

Summary: When Sebastian turns to dark magic to cure his sister, Nova and Ominis find themselves reluctantly thrust into a partnership to aid him. Amid the disapproval of Ominis' family, Nova wrestles with her growing feelings for him and also with the nagging suspicion that Ominis knows more about Anne's condition than he's letting on.

AO3 // Masterlist

Warning: Graphic depiction of violence, scenes of death

Sebastian clawed at every inch of the hollow stone chest, his breaths torn and ragged, intermingled with forceful huffs of, "It's here. It IS here."

Nova scarcely registered his garbled words. Coarse shingles tore into her palms as she frantically scraped at the ground, desperate to put some distance between herself and Solomon's crumpled body but the sarcophagus at her back held her firmly in place.

"You've got to run. Find someone from the village, someone who can apparate to the authorities or the Ministry."

The words reached her ears but slid through her consciousness without leaving any lasting impact. A presence intruded her field of vision, and her eyes stung as they recalibrated and snapped into focus on Ominis' face. "Do you hear what I'm saying?" He sounded composed, but the pressure of his fingers digging into her shoulders was desperate and painful.

“I told Sebastian everything.” She tried to convey they needed to get him out before he confronted Marvolo, before he got himself killed, but the words remained lodged in her throat.

"What?"

"I told him about Anne. Get him out of here. We need to—now!"

Ominis ditched their cover, his foot catching on scattered bones, "Sebastian, we're getting out of here right now. Get up!"

If Sebastian heard him, he didn’t react. His feral eyes darted wildly around the chamber, his search for the relic growing increasingly erratic as his shattered fingernails tore at the stone.

"You've been stoking father's anger.” Marvolo hauled himself off the ground with all the grace he could muster, but the scorn that twisted across his face exposed the deep-rooted mortification of nearly being bested in a duel. “Do you know who bears the brunt when you do that?"

"I've washed my hands of you. Whatever you bicker about behind closed doors is none of my concern." Ominis gripped Sebastian's elbow, giving it a firm yank to pull him up. Sebastian's feeble resistance instantly crumbled as he slumped against Ominis. "You've had your fun. We've got the warning. Now, we're leaving."

Sebastian teetered on unsteady feet, and it became a struggle for Ominis to keep him upright. Fortunately, he appeared too disoriented to connect the dots and recall Nova’s confession.

They took a step forward, but Marvolo’s wand swiped into their path "I'm not here to scold. Our family affairs won't be exposed by this." he ran his wand up the length of Sebastian’s throat, pausing just under his chin.

“He’s not a threat.”

"Well, that's not what father thinks, i've been ordered to silence him." Marvolo quirked an eyebrow. "Though I suppose that doesn't necessarily mean kill. I can think of another friend of yours who knows that all too well."

If Ominis felt intimidated, he hid it well. He shoved Marvolo's wand out of the way, making a move to pass him. "Nova, let's go."

"I could easily scramble their brains if you'd prefer. Crucio for an extended period would do the trick, you know.” He leant into Ominis’ ear and whispered, “That's what I did to Noctua."

Ominis’ knuckles audibly cracked as he tensed, almost snapping his wand in half.

"She couldn't even speak by the time I was through with her. I think that would be the preferable option, don't you? I've always believed that children should be seen and not heard."

Sebastian had been teetering on the brink of unconsciousness but jolted to full attention as Marvolo's words struck a nerve. He pushed Ominis away, staggering and nearly collapsing to the floor. His bloodshot eyes darted between Nova and Marvolo as the pieces clicked into place. “She…” he stumbled, pointing at Nova. “She was telling the truth?” A heavy silence descended upon the room. “No, no, no,” Sebastian began mumbling. “… You were helping me.”

“Nothing more than a bit of fun, I’m afraid. I take pleasure in offering people a glimpse of hell before I send them to it.”

Sebastian was a skilled duellist, but his blind fury made his onslaught of attacks reckless and predictable, his outraged cries betrayed his every movement.

Nova scrabbled at the bottom of her empty pocket for her wand. Had she been disarmed? The details of the past hour eluded her as she pressed her bloodied palms against the casket and fought to rise to her feet, squinting through the dazzling display of spells in an attempt to locate her missing wand.

Her vision twisted sideways as Ominis rammed into her shoulder and knocked back a malicious curse. A violent explosion of sparks erupted on impact with the wall and a layer of rock collapsed into a billowing, dusty plume.

Marvolo possessed a broader range of significantly more powerful spells. Effortlessly dodging and swatting away Sebastian and Ominis’ school-mandated attacks without flinching. Sebastian unleashed an onslaught of more malevolent strikes, but Marvolo easily manipulated their course. One blasted into Sebastian's chest and threw him back, his head meeting rock with a sickening crack and he dropped into a motionless heap on the ground.

Marvolo's simmering rage appeared to be mitigated by the unbalanced battle. With a nonchalant twirl of his wand, he advanced towards Sebastian's unconscious body with a look of icy amusement.

"Avada Kedavra!" Nova poured all her emotion into the incantation, she wasn't entirely sure if it was the correct one, and she still didn't have her wand, but her intentions hit the mark as Marvolo staggered backwards, his focus now on her.

"Your kitten has claws," he sneered, a predatory grin stretching across his face as he prowled toward her.

Ominis stood staunchly, shielding them both. He grunted and strained as he fended off the relentless onslaught of stinging hexes. He might not have been an adept duellist, but his skills in defence easily matched Marvolo’s skill at offence.

"Fuck this," the dark wizard spat in frustration as his strikes refused to land.

Ominis sensed what was coming. His intuition took over as he shielded his head with his arms, dropping his wand into Nova’s lap as he crashed to his knees. A searing crimson bolt erupted from Marvolo's wand, obliterating the protective barrier Ominis had desperately been trying to uphold.

The familiarity he had with bracing his body against the Cruciatus Curse triggered a surge of fury-fuelled adrenaline that jolted some of Nova’s instincts back into action.

She fought to her feet, but a visceral, gut-wrenching groan erupted from the depths of Ominis' throat before she could channel her anger constructively.

She dropped back to her knees beside him, pulling his head up onto her lap to stop the ground from tearing at his face as he writhed in agony. She whimpered through gritted teeth at the blistering sensation in her fingers as they pressed against his scorched skin.

She snatched up his discarded wand. Brandishing an unfamiliar wand in the midst of battle was a sure-fire way to get a rejected spell blow up in your face but she was positive he deliberately passed it to her. She prayed that small action was sufficient enough for the wand to put its trust in her.

She aimed directly at Marvolo's face to disrupt his concentration. The wand obediently responded to her spellcasting, but he effortlessly deflected with a dismissive wave while upholding the curse. It was pure instinct on his part, he didn't even bother casting a shield.

The only obvious flaw she could detect was he seemed almost reluctant to finish her off. Marvolo had a penchant for toying with his opponents before delivering the final blow - This granted her a slim window to gain an advantage.

She prepared to cast an explosion at his feet, but her aim faltered. Initially attributing it to exhaustion but quickly realising Ominis' wand was tugging at her hand, directing the spell toward the cavern ceiling. Barely uttering the incantation, the red spark prematurely streaked through a narrow crack, casting a fleeting blaze of light into the darkness before an earth-shattering crack tore the rock apart.

Nova cast protego with all her strength, and the shield bloomed around them. Marvolo's fixation on the cruciatus cost him precious seconds of protection as he scrambled to shield himself, his concentration shattering when he lunged to evade the collapsing rock.

Based on her prior experience, she knew Ominis would be disorientated as the pain subsided and given the bedlam of the cave-in, it must have been nothing short of horrifying. She gently rubbed his stinging skin as he trembled against her legs and his ragged breathing began to regulate.

"Sebastian?" Nova’s voice devolved into a coughing fit as the swirling dust inside their protective bubble invaded her lungs. She tried to cast some protection where she had last seen him, but the thick dust obscured her vision, making it impossible to pinpoint him.

Her vision gradually cleared, unveiling the catacombs buried beneath a tumultuous heap of rocks and boulders. Nova's eyes zeroed in on a trail of blood, slowly trickling across the ground and pooling at her feet. She tried to call out but a surge of sickness clawed its way up her throat, choking off any attempt to scream Sebastian’s name.

A tortured cry, forced through clenched teeth, erupted from the head of the stream of blood. Everything below Marvolo’s knees was crushed. He cast the boulder aside with a wave of his wand, his screams muffled by the fabric of his sleeve as he attempted to move. The flattened flesh of his calves tore as he struggled to shift his thigh.

His consciousness teetered, and he slowly collapsed onto his elbow. His head swayed back, but a surge of determination breathed some life into him as his eyes fixated on Nova. His wand almost slipped from his grasp, and he fought to maintain his grip, summoning every ounce of his remaining strength to raise it in her direction.

“Avada Kedavra.”

Nova hadn't realized how still the catacombs had become until Sebastian's surprisingly composed voice shot through it. The cave was momentarily engulfed in a searing green flash as it struck Marvolo—the blast echoed with a resounding crack before plunging back into a heavy silence.

He carelessly stamped through the expanding pool of Marvolo’s blood as he clambered over to Nova and Ominis. "You knew," he snarled, his hand trembling as he jabbed his wand against Nova’s neck. He was deathly pale, grit clinging to his skin in thick layers. "How?"

"Don't point that at me," Nova attempted to sound firm, but the wavering in her voice betrayed just how terrified she was of him.

"How?"

She could hardly force herself to speak, her oesophagus burned and there was a sharp stabbing pain shooting through her lungs every time she breathed in. "He told me. Threatened he’d do the same to me.”

“What possessed you to keep that from me?”

"Sebastian," Ominis was shaking uncontrollably as he attempted to lift himself up onto his palms. "I made her swear to keep it from you."

“You knew too?”

A blast shot from Nova's hand, the realisation hitting her only after the fact that she was still tightly clutching Ominis' wand. It struck Sebastian, causing him to stiffen and begin to topple backwards. Her instinctive reflexes kicked in she managed to catch him mid-fall and gently lower him to the ground.

 

 

Nova stood in front of the Feldcroft noticeboard, numb. The biting wind whipped at her exposed skin, but she barely registered its sting. She carefully scrutinised every leaflet and letter, using the task as a distraction from the swirling images that her mind was grappling to process.

She fixated on the eyes of a petty thief - her contorted, snarling face captured on a wanted poster. The image screamed at her in desperate defiance until the composite sketch on the parchment warped and reformed into the next wanted criminal.

“Nova?” Ominis' gentle touch on her shoulder made her jolt. “We should get moving.” There was a slight tremor underscoring his voice. He was handling the aftermath of the Cruciatus curse much more smoothly than she had. She guessed his resilience came with experience, and the thought broke her heart.

She responded with a subdued hum, her mind lagging a few seconds behind as it sought to process his words. She lingered for one last moment on the notice board, absorbing the details before the image seamlessly shifted again.

 

REWARD FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO THE APPREHENSION OF:

Sebastian Sallow

Wanted for murder – Approach with extreme caution.

 

“Are you alright?” Ominis asked as her breaths escalated into rapid hyperventilation.

She tore the poster from the board, blinking away her tears as she studied the image. The composite sketch revealed a boy with wavy brown hair and a smattering of freckles, appearing slightly too young, his eyes set just a bit too close together.

 

REWARD FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO THE APPREHENSION OF:

Sullivan Scott

Wanted in connection to a breaking and entering – Approach with extreme caution.

 

"I’m just exhausted, eyes are playing tricks," she whispered, wiping away the tear stains on her cheeks and tucking the poster into the folds of her cloak.

Ominis' hand moved from her shoulder to intertwine their fingers, urging her to follow him. "The neighbours are apparating Sebastian and Anne to St Mungo’s.”

“Should we go with them?”

"They’ll be safe. I want to get you away from here, you need to go to bed.”

A weak protest was on the tip of her tongue, but as soon as he mentioned "bed," every muscle in her body urged her to shut up and comply and she followed him without further objection.

 

"What's in your belongings that's crucial right now?" Nova wearily ascended the astronomy stairs, summoning a small amount of strength to fuel her irritation with Professor Shah. She couldn't fathom why she’d insisted Ominis leave his belongings in her classroom—another item added to her ever-growing list of grievances with that woman.

"I did specifically ask you to wait for me in our common room."

“I don’t want to be left alone," Nova confessed with a vulnerability she was too drained to conceal.

Her lifeless stare fixed straight, focusing on the ache in her legs as she ascended the stairwell. Ominis' fingers tightened around hers, the lingering trace of the curse still inducing a subtle tremor in his reflexes.

"I've got a portkey, that's what I need," Ominis admitted, rounding the corner. The soft squeak of their shoes broke the quiet stillness of the observatory. "It takes me home."

"Why do you need that?" Nova couldn't comprehend how her body conjured the energy to produce goosebumps, but they crackled across every inch of her skin. "Why now?"

“I need to speak to my father.”

Nova quickened her pace, determined to be the first to reach his bag. Her fingers tightly gripped the handle as she pulled it behind her, afraid he might vanish the moment he touched it. "Is it to tell him about Marvolo? He'll find out about him whether or not you’re the one to break the news."

"I don't doubt he already knows," Ominis said calmly, pulling out the chair from Shah's desk and wincing as he settled into it. "I wouldn't be surprised if he's already in the catacombs."

“We need to get to Sebastian.”

The jolt of panic propelled Nova into action, and she began pacing relentlessly, the weighty satchel of Ominis' schoolwork banging against her heels. She couldn't understand why they’d let Sebastian and Anne out of their sight if Ominis knew his father would be close behind. "What if he tries to find him? St Mungo's won't be able to protect him. We need to take him away—"

Palms on her shoulders brought Nova's marching to a halt, and Ominis ran his hand down her arm to reclaim his confiscated bag. "Revenge will be at the bottom of his list of priorities right now, I promise. You need to breathe."

"What would be at the top?"

"He's lost his heir which provides me with a bargaining chip." His books and parchment cascaded from his bag, landing unceremoniously on the desk as he began rummaging around in the chaos. "Maybe I can advocate for Sebastian's innocence and negotiate a deal."

"In return for what?" She pressed her palms against the metal railing to ground herself, though the skyline was rolling like waves. "Do you have a bargaining tool, or are you the bargaining tool?"

He stayed quiet, and for a heart-stopping moment, she thought he might have vanished. She spun around so fast that her vision distorted. When things came back into focus, there he was, clutching a small leather pouch that she assumed held his portkey. His eyes were shut as he absentmindedly tapped his wand against the table.

“You can’t go back to them,” she argued, praying he was reconsidering. “Sebastian assisted in killing Solomon. He killed your brother in cold blood with an unforgivable curse. I’m not sure there’s any way we’ll be able to spin this in his favour.”

“It’s not about spinning it, I’ve seen my family pay off law enforcement for worse crimes than this.”

“Worse crimes than a double murder? Murder of their own blood?”

“There’s a reason they haven’t had Noctua pronounced dead,” he was speaking with an unnatural calmness that indicated his mind was likely made up.

“…And you think it’s a good idea to reason with that family?”

“My family,” he spoke softly, running his fingers through his hair. “Marvolo was right, everything we touch turns to ruin. The best thing I can do is take it far away from the people I care about. Sebastian shouldn’t have used that spell, but if he hadn’t, you'd both be dead. It was self-defence.”

She wanted to argue. It wasn't like Sebastian was just a blameless spectator, he had been on the verge of just standing by while she was killed. She knew he wasn't entirely to blame but the fear she had suffered knowing she was as good as dead the second she was pitted against Anne was excruciating. Her vision blurred into a watery haze as she suppressed a sob.

She was pulled into something solid and warm, her breaths becoming heavy against Ominis' shoulder as he held her. They stayed like that for what felt like hours, though it might have only been seconds.

"Anne's torn about turning him in," Ominis spoke, breaking the silence as Nova's breathing steadied. "A part of her wants him to face the consequences, but another part can't bear the thought. She's lost her health, her uncle, and now possibly her brother. Considering all the pain I've caused her, I have to at least try to spare Sebastian, for her sake."

"Will you be enough of a bargaining chip to make that happen?" she mumbled, her words absorbed by the damp fabric of his cloak.

"My father always insisted I should have been the firstborn. Less erratic, more pliable—easier to manipulate.”

“He sounds like a nice man.”

He chuckled while reaching up to wipe the tears from his eyes, emitting a soft hiss as he inadvertently scrubbed against a cut beneath his eye.

I can heal that for you," Nova instinctively reached for her wand, only to curse softly as she discovered her pocket held nothing but the wanted poster. She tossed it onto Ominis' pile of parchments, figuring his wand would probably be more effective in healing him anyway. "Here, let me borrow your wand."

He spun the wand between his fingers, the smooth wood gliding against his skin before passing her the handle. Nova's fingers, trembling either from fatigue or the chill in the air, made their way to the side of his face.

"In the cave, I felt your wand redirect the spell," she started, noticing the slight concern in his expression as her hands trembled around his wound. "I was targeting Marvolo, but it ended up pointing towards the ceiling."

Reaching up, he gently covered her hand, steadying her unsteady grip. "It does that."

"Do you ever cast your own spells?" she probed, rubbing away as much congealed blood as possible with her sleeve before resting the wand's tip against the top of the wound.

"When things get disorienting, especially in life-or-death moments, it's like it has an instinct that takes over. I always thought wands choose their wizards, and if I had known mine would just... surrender to anyone..." His eyebrow quirked.

She released a breath that resembled a laugh. "Am I just anyone?"

“Evidently not.”

She felt overwhelmed by a surge of affection but forced herself not to react, "Sebastian once told me your wand was sentient."

"I see why he would think that."

"Maybe it knows when it's in the hands of someone who loves you, someone who's trying to keep you safe," Nova said as she slowly ran the wand down the length of the wound, watching the skin gradually knit itself back together.

She noticed after a few moments that Ominis had stopped breathing, his jaw tense beneath her palm as she continued to work on healing his cut.

"Are you alright?" She leaned back to admire her handiwork, her eyes blurred and reeled from the shift in focus, and she nearly stumbled backwards.

“Are you?” Ominis reached out, cupping her cheek, and she instinctively leaned into the rare display of affection.

The sound of rapidly approaching steps shattered the silence, making Nova glance at the clock. It was nearly three o’clock—students shouldn't be out of bed. The footfalls were too erratic, almost stumbling, ruling out the possibility of it being a professor.

Garreth burst around the corner, his face nearly as red as his hair, deep gasps escaping him as he clumsily steadied himself against the wall.

“Garreth? What are you running from.”

"Running to," he corrected with ragged gasps between each word. "Looking for you… What are you doing… just standing here?"

Nova looked at Ominis who appeared just as bewildered as her.

"They're searching for you," Garreth declared urgently, his eyes wide with concern. "Professor Black has plastered notices all over the castle. Everyone's on the lookout for you."

"What are you talking about?" Nova assumed news had spread about Sebastian, and she wasn't prepared for the barrage of questions coming their way. As she moved to scoop up Ominis' books and cram them back into his satchel, she caught a glimpse of the wanted poster amidst the scattered papers. She blinked forcefully, her eyes playing tricks on her again, but the image stubbornly refused to alter.

"Ominis?" She was certain she said his name, but the sound seemed lost in the air. The books slipped from her grasp as she lifted the parchment, her own eyes staring back at her.

 

REWARD FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO THE APPREHENSION OF:

Nova Fenwick

Wanted for murder - Approach with extreme caution.

 

She attempted to speak, but the resounding ringing in her ears drowned out any sound. Garreth animatedly conveyed something to Ominis, who promptly snatched the parchment from her grasp. Running his wand over the letters, his face turned notably pale.

"How is that even possible?" Nova locked her gaze onto Garreth as if he held all the answers. "We barely left, the police wouldn't have had a chance to sweep the scene."

"Weasley, how did you find us?" Ominis swiftly positioned himself between Garreth and Nova, gently prying his wand from her fingers.

"Shah made you leave your stuff in class. I figured I could cut you off if you came back to get it."

"Give me your wand," Ominis demanded, pointing his own toward Garreth as he advanced with his open palm outstretched.

"What are you doing?" Garreth raised both of his hands defensively, his eyes darting between the pair of them. “You don’t seriously think I'm here for the reward, do you?”

“Ominis, he's okay,” Nova interjected, positive Garreth wasn't capable of ever being a threat.

“Then let him prove it. Wand.”

Garreth rolled his eyes but withdrew his wand from the depths of his cloak and slapped it into Ominis’ outstretched hand. “Thank you for the warning, Garreth, it’s been invaluable,” he mumbled under his breath. “I came to find you because I think I can help. I was in the middle of making a batch of thunderbrew the other day, experimenting with the ingredients to see what would happen. I used a bit too much haliwinkle, and at first, I thought it might work as a—"

“Garreth, the point.”

“Right, sorry. I made this.” He sidestepped around Ominis, giving him a weary once-over before pulling out a handful of clinking vials from his pocket. “I call it mimicry mist. Drink it, and it transforms the surroundings into a storm just like thunderbrew, but to the extreme. Visibility drops to zero. I altered it so that instead of disorientating with thunder, it mimics noises—whispers, faint echoes of your own voice. I made it with the intention of it being used for defence, to disorient pursuers and help slip away unnoticed, and look at this,” he slapped his palm against Nova’s wanted poster with gleeful delirium. “Perfect testing opportunity.”

"So, your mission isn’t to rescue Nova from a false arrest, you're here just to have her test one of your home brews?"

"I can have two motives. Do you want the potion or not?"

“Yes, thank you, Garreth,” Nova accepted the small glass vials from him and gave one a shake. The shimmery silver liquid swirled like a rolling cloud within the confines of the phial.

“You’re welcome. Just... if you get the chance, shoot me an owl letting me know how it went. The taste, how you felt, how effective – that kind of thing.”

Ominis clasped Nova’s hand firmly. "We have to move."

The three of them sprinted down the staircase, Ominis muting their frantic footfalls with a silencing charm.

Nova clung desperately to the handrail, her grip the only thing preventing her from catapulting headfirst down the spiral staircase, “Do you think we could lie low in the Undercroft?”

“What’s an Undercroft?” Garreth's foot almost slipped on a discarded gobstone, and it chased them with a series of echoing clinks as it tumbled down the steps.

"No, that's the first place they'll look," Ominis sidestepped Garreth’s question entirely. "We need to travel by floo."

"They? But how would anyone even—?" Nova started, but the realisation hit her. "You believe your family is involved in this?"

“Oooo the Gaunt’s did it?” Garreth’s question was punctuated by a dramatic gasp, followed by a whispered, “What did they do?”

“It’s a large reward,” Ominis said, his voice lowering as they neared the base of the astronomy tower. "More than the authorities would put on the table. My fathers searching for you."

Nova snagged Garreth’s hood just in time to prevent him from careening around the corner. The sounds of Professor Hecat herding confused Ravenclaws, all deeply engaged in wild theories, rang through the corridor. The typical emergency evacuation to the Great Hall appeared to be underway, but they were taking their sweet time, and time was a luxury they couldn't afford.

Ominis reached into Nova’s pocket, helping himself to a vial of Garreth’s concoction.

"Is this going to blow us up?" Nova asked Garreth, smacked by a vivid memory of their first potions class together.

"Well..." He swayed slightly as he shifted his weight. "You've got to keep in mind it's still just a prototype... and, well, it's a different batch from the one I've tested before, so there might be some variations."

Ominis rolled the potion bottle between his fingers wearily. "Why are you helping us? How can you be sure we're innocent?"

“Are you?”

“Yes.”

Garreth shrugged, “I believe you.”

Nova was hit with a twinge of guilt at his loyalty given that up until now she hadn’t really seen him as a friend so much as she had a mildly annoying herbology partner. She pulled him into a tight hug.

“A cuddle isn’t going to cut it, Sunshine. I better be getting a godchild out of this.”

"Provided this potion works, we'll name him Garreth," Ominis remarked with a wry smile, nodding appreciatively. Nova barely had a moment to grasp the weight of his words before he downed the potion.

For a brief moment, nothing seemed to happen, and Garreth's expression fell. Ominis' eyes flickered up, their striking blue had shifted into a brooding dark grey. Misty clouds began swirled around him—dense, just as Garreth had described.

Nova's registered the solid clasp of Ominis' grip around her wrist just as her vision was consumed by the swirling fog. Students were screaming and crying out as they ran, and in the midst of the chaos Nova was sure she heard Sebastian's voice calling to her. She clamped her eyes shut, reassuring herself that it was the spell doing its job. They crashed into the scattered, terrified students, and barely dodging a wild elbow that nearly knocked her down. The anarchy began to fade away just as quickly as it had arrived, dwindling into the distance behind them and they slipped down the hall.

“Do you have any relatives with a floo connection we can go to?” Ominis huffed over his shoulder as the potion effects began to wear off, their footsteps resonating through the desolate corridor.

“No one that I trust to hide us.”

As her vision began to clear, Nova stumbled over her own feet and nearly ended up on the floor. A memory flashed in her mind of falling to this floor with Sebastian, though the details were hazy. They had been running together, laughing. Tears welled up in her eyes as Ominis tried to pull her toward the flames, but she firmly dug her heels into the ground.

“Me and Sebastian were here,” her thoughts were cloudy as she pulled herself upright using the tapestry of Barnabas the Barmy. They had been racing through the corridor, crisscrossing past each other in a search for something. Something elusive. As the fog of the memory lifted, her eyes widened, and she propelled herself back in the direction they had just come.

“What are you doing?!”

“Trust me,” she mumbled, trying to maintain clarity. What was it they needed? Somewhere they could hide and strategize. A place to rest and recharge – this thought slammed an image of her cosy dorm bed into her mind, but she tossed it away. Refocusing on what they urgently needed, she spun on her heels and dashed back towards Ominis.

Deep grooves began etching themselves into the stonework of the wall, spiralling and curving to form an ornate archway. The stonework seamlessly gave way to wooden planks as a door crept forward. Nova seized Ominis’ hand, yanking him with her as she burst through the doorway. She slammed the door shut behind them with a forceful thud, panting heavily as she leaned her back against it, taking a moment to catch her breath.

"There's no room here," Ominis bumped into her as he attempted to retreat against the entryway. "This room shouldn't exist. Where are we?"

Nova's eyes fluttered open, and her first impression was that they had landed in her dorm room. A familiar trunk, identical to her own, rested on the floor. It even had her spare clothes and pyjamas scattered haphazardly across it, just where she’d flung them this morning. As her eyes adjusted, she noticed that the room was significantly smaller, keeping its circular shape and emerald embellishments, but her roommates' beds were noticeably missing.

"Sebastian mentioned it. That book he found in the restricted section had a piece on secret rooms in Hogwarts, and this was one of them. I can't recall the name, but it conjures whatever you need."

“Need is subjective, if someone needs to find you, won’t they stumble upon us?”

Nova instinctively moved towards her bed, her entire body relaxing as she perched on the edge. "As far as I'm aware, this place isn't common knowledge."

"So, it's impossible to stumble upon?" Ominis pressed urgently, starting to explore the room, his hands trailing along the walls.

"Uhh..." Nova reminisced about how she discovered the room in the first place. Professor Shah had refused to let her use the toilet during class in her first week. Not knowing where she was, she must have sprinted up and down the corridor searching for the toilets and ended up using this room when it presented itself as a toilet. "For the most part."

"I don’t trust it." Ominis started circling the room, running his wand across every ridge he could find, and chanting 'revelio' every few seconds.

Nova allowed him to go about his business, stripping off her soiled clothes and using them to wipe away the clinging grit on her skin. After pulling on her pyjamas, she slumped into bed as if this were an average Tuesday night. "I've got some fresh clothes here if you want," she mumbled, already feeling sleep taking over.

“What if they’re right behind us?”

"Well, this is a spectacular way to spend my last few minutes of freedom," she stretched out a yawn. Her eyelids grew heavy as she watched him ponder his next move. Exhaustion was creeping in, but right before it could fully take over, she sensed a gentle dip in the bed.

[feralkwe]

i remember very distinctly the day my kid was born. i never wanted to be pregnant, never really wanted kids, and had a huge rush of relief when it was over. kind of a sense of accomplishment similar to crossing a finish line in a cross country race. and then suddenly i was alone in a room with this absolute stranger. i didn't feel instant love like everyone insisted would happen. it was a pretty lonely feeling that went on for weeks. we didn't really talk about postpartum depression back then, or mental health in general, but it was pretty obvious to me as i stared, unfeeling, at my baby that something was wrong with me. everyone praised me for how naturally i took to it. i felt like a monster because everyone would be like "omg don't you just love [child] so much???" and, well, no. i didn't. i had a baby because religious pressure made it my only option forward.

i got there. in no way do i regret my kiddo (hi there, kiddo!), but the beginning was rough and there was no real conversation involving what i was feeling. even though i was single and far too young, i had a strong support network that got me through it. perhaps more than some parents who go into the experience with gusto and enthusiasm. parents and grandparents and friends and so much extended family. luckily i was the type of person who eventually worked through it, and damn if i don't think i did a fantastic job that resulted in a pretty rad human. but i was, in so many ways, lucky.

it's thankless and lonely and yeah, boring as fuck. and that's all once you get past the incredible medical toll on your body and before you get to the chaos and sleeplessness and extreme financial strain. no one should ever feel pressured into parenthood. it's not some blessed miracle. it's a biological process that is gross and messy and painful, followed by 18 years (in many cases more) of a sort of psychological warfare that some people are equipped to overcome, and some are not.

even if you are the sort of person who, like me, can get there and learn to love the experience, you shouldn't have to unless you truly, dearly want to. children are too easily harmed for you to go in half-cocked, half-assed, or half-hearted. and harm done to adults who don't want children but are forced to by society or religion or misplaced sense of obligation has to matter, too. people who simply do not want to need to matter.

half of the pro-choice conversation should be and needs to be about normalizing not having children at all, and it just is not. we're not there yet, and even if some of us claw through it in spite of ourselves and even if some of us truly value it eventually, we really need to be more cognizant of how casually we leave the people who don't want to essentially abandoned to a variety of situations, from forced-birth pressure to the seemingly innocent "oh, so when are you having kids?"

pro-choice means every choice.

[avelera]

I finally made a good Dark Urge run that I found narratively convincing instead of just sort of "meh". All my other good Durge attempts have just sort of been hodgepodges of whatever class or story choices I felt I hadn't yet seen in the game.

This time I went full Paladin with a backstory that's sort of Shadowheart/Karlach blend, ie, was raised in the Bhaalist cult and spent most of their life wishing they could get out of it, but being the Chosen meant she had pretty much no choice, no hope of getting out.

(Just a bit of rambling about a BG3 run I'm doing, writing about it mostly for my own sake.)

Also for flavor decided to name her Brienelle after Drizzt and Catti-brie's canonical daughter and decided my Durge convinced herself she actually "is" Drizzt's daughter. Is she actually? Absolutely not, the math does not line up. But it's a fairytale she told herself about how her "real" parents are heroes, that they're out there somewhere and miss her, that Bhaal isn't actually her father, that she was "Chosen" because she's a hero's daughter (much like Shadowheart was chosen for being Selunite). As a result, she aspired to heroism but frankly every pressure in her life, her entire upbringing, was channeled to her being the cult's Chosen so she eventually, reluctantly, fell in line. A bit like Astarion in this respect, Bhaal like Cazador was simply too powerful and too able to destroy her if she tried to escape, never mind being able to literally take her body over with the Urges. But now she's conveniently "lost".

I think what finally worked was having someone who wasn't just "good" but who was wholeheartedly dedicated to doing good after never having the chance before. So every rescued person, every kind word, every grateful companion and new friend is positive reinforcement that it is possible for her to lead the life she chooses, to be a hero. So Paladin fits that very well.

My one regret so far--as I try to balance RP with not just making the same choices in every playthrough-- is romancing Shadowheart at the party. Mostly I chose her because 2/3 of my favorite romances, Karlach and Gale, don't have anything that evening and so I've got multiple playthroughs with Astarion as the Act 1 romance before pivoting to friendship with him or romancing all the way through. Gale is the romance I keep defaulting to, I can't help it, I just love that nerd so much. So I really wanted to at least see Shadowheart's romance for once. (For the record, she was my least favorite character for a long time, I've only grudgingly started to warm to her.)

But then the day after they shared a glass of wine and slept together, Shadowheart started talking about her aspirations to be a Dark Justiciar and Brienelle's stomach just... dropped.

I don't know if I just hadn't exhausted the dialogue options for her yet or what but Brienelle... Brienelle is like the mirror opposite of Shadowheart. She was raised to be special in the Bhaalist cult and has been trying to escape it her whole life. Conversely, Shadowheart thinks she's just one of many Shar cultists and is fighting to be someone special within the cult.

Brienelle would have felt a certain kinship to Shadowheart over both of them having amnesia, but when Shadowheart began to speak so fondly of life in the cult of an evil deity, Brienelle just felt... pity. And sadness. She felt old. She could see Shadowheart working her way towards the realization that what she suffered in Shar's cult was abuse. She knows that someone, anyone outside it extending a hand to help could help pull Shadowheart free. But Shadowheart doesn't even want to be free yet.

So both in and out of game it feels like Brienelle just... regrets sleeping with Shadowheart. The intimacy was nice. And she cares for Shadowheart. But it feels like she doesn't have anyone she can lean on, no one she can be herself with or seek support from, because Shadowheart is so naive and yet had such a similar journey to her. Like she can't be open about her fight to escape Bhaal because Shadowheart just wouldn't understand, Shadowheart wanted the opposite.

Astarion doesn't appeal to Brienelle either. He's unabashedly evil and while she feels for what he went through and identifies with his suffering, she really just isn't in a place where she wants to be mocked as if being good and caring for others is somehow the weak option when it's actually the hardest but most rewarding thing she's ever been lucky enough to do. How can you have freedom, finally, and not want to be free to not have to be a monster anymore? She loves him but their morals are just too diametrically opposed for more than friendship.

Lae'zel obviously doesn't have good-aligned morals either and wouldn't begin to understand what Brienelle went through.

Wyll is the son of a Duke. He might perhaps understand the weight of privilege, but for him doing good was always an option. He's only just begun to see what evil can do. And if he ever hit her with a platitude about the importance of being a hero or how she should have just fought harder to escape Bhaal, she might actually give in to the Urge right there and stab him.

And Karlach and Gale were off the table because of their two different flavors of, "I might explode if you touch me."

Thing is, I think she might pivot to Gale over Karlach. It's repetitive for me, sure, but I think Karlach's tragedy is just too similar to her own and Karlach going through a similar hellish experience and then choosing death is just... too much. It's not something Brienelle is strong enough to bear once Karlach resolves to choose death.

Conversely, Gale is a mature adult. He has his own life. His morals are good, he always encourages heroism. And he wants to live. He can be talked pretty easily out of sacrificing himself at Mystra's command. He wants to come out on the other side of this. He resents being a god's Chosen, something Brienelle can sincerely relate to.

Their stories don't overlap much beyond that, but that's a good thing actually. They can just be two people, two heroes doing the right thing where they can and being their own people after having their younger years fucked over by being the Chosen of a god. And ultimately, that's what Brienelle wants. Not a life entirely without drama but a life where she can be her own person, with other adults, and pursue her own calling without being chained to the past.

[breezybeej]

Summarizing the shit I've been ranting about to my buffy freaks this week re: "you arent the source of me"

only spoiling things through s5e12 because i havent watched anything past that

Giles on vampires: "You aren't looking at your friend, you're looking at the thing that killed him"

Let's think about vampires thematically.

They are stuck in time, as noted by Buffy. They dress like the era they died in.

They are demons inhabiting the bodies of man.

They are made when a person sucks off another vampire (sorry).

Obviously we see vampires used metaphorically for pretty much every vice. Vampires as heroin use, vampires as sex workers, vampires as peer pressure, if humans do something unsavory, the show presents the vampires as that thing in an episode.

"You aren't looking at your friend, you are looking at the thing that killed him." You are seeing a vampire continue doing the things that led to them dying as a person. Extending that, imagine seeing someone you know still engaging in a fatal vice (like drugs), you don't see them as your friend anymore. You see a walking reminder that your friend is lost to drugs. It puts Riley in an interesting situation of 'going' but not 'being gone' to his vice. Buffy is already seeing him as 'the thing that is killing him' and she's arguing with herself on if she can pull him back out. Riley turns to the army. Either way, he needed structure OR someone to be with him (to like, keep him accountable), two options people typically need IRL for overcoming addiction. He picked structure.

Buffy expresses to Angel that when he kisses her, sometimes she wants to die. What if I want to lock myself in my current state forever, the state where we are together and I love you. Angel doesn't want this because he overcame his vices and he doesn't want Buffy to go through that awful shit. He also gives us a story of relapsing and how, with the help of a found family, he came back out of it.

So what is the opposite of a vampire? The Slayer. And it's the same thing. Buffy is always trying to use structure and friends to Not Be Stuck in the downward spiral of Slayerdom. It's her whole story arc since season 1. When people look at buffy, many see A Killer. She kills things. "But it isn't like that. I don't kill, I slay. I do it to protect and I don't enjoy it." But Buffy is always walking that line, isn't she. Her lowest moments usually deal with that balance, grappling with losing control or her own mortality. This is why Faith is so compelling. Faith is everything Buffy fears.

"I have no speech. No name. I live in the action of death. The blood-cry, the penetrating wound. I am destruction. Absolute. Alone."

"The Slayer."

The action of death, the thing that kills. The Drugs, the Sex, the Violence. The Vices, and for Buffy, the Slaying. Faith paints slaying as this romp, this thrill that is sexual, empowering, and fun. Buffy fears Slaying. Buffy looks at all of her friends and sees them as victims to her fate. They will die because of her. Because she can't control her Slayer because... it kind of is fun. She does get that thrill. Season 5 starts with her restlessly leaving in the night to engage in that cheap thrill aspect of it. Much like riley leaves in the night to get sucked off (sorry, it's just so fun to say)

She says: "You have to get over the primal power thing. You are not the source of me." and she returns to her friends. She is accepting that she can find the balance. She has the structure and the support network. She has everything she needs to prevent herself from Becoming What Kills Her. Her friends don't look at her as The Slayer. They look at her as their dear friend, daughter, lover, confidant, silly rabbit. She is more than the Slayer to Giles, to Willow, to Xander. She's becoming more to Tara and Anya and--most importantly, now--Spike (the freak obsessed specifically with Killing Slayers).

She just went through this arc with Dawn. She looked at Dawn and saw the key but then saw how that made her own self violent towards *her sister.* She doesn't see Dawn as the key, as the thing that will kill* her, that's my fucking baby sister

*kill as in "this is your fate" Buffy won't let it be her fate

I still need to like. structure this and solidify the themes but you see what I'm working toward, kind of. All this talk of Sources. What is someone's source. Is it the vices they engage in? Is a drug addict simply a drug addict or are they a member of a community who is struggling without support?

My favorite trait that Buffy shows is Seeing the Humanity in creatures. It isn't ever explicitly addressed but it shows up through the whole show. She adopts demons, she stops before decapitating Angel, she almost stops Faith from committing misandry, she senses something up with Ted and Kathy, she can't bring herself to kill Spike. She sees Dawn AS HER LITTLE SISTER (the hair stroking is already killing me). And we saw her struggle with guilt when faced with Riley's suck-girl (and she caves in to her emotions and kills her anyway). We've been getting more scenes where she either feels bad about killing some vamps or people make her feel bad about it. "Buffy, you are better than this. You aren't just a slayer who goes around and slays vamps indiscriminately. You are not The Slayer. You are Buffy.

Right now, it is happening again. Buffy doesn't see her mom. She sees a walking brain tumor. "You aren't looking at your [mom], you are looking at the thing that['s killing her]." She is looking at her mom the way she looks at vampires and that is what causes her to go into this slayer mode. Why she gets antsy and has to "go do something, I can't sit and do nothing" because the problem is so similar to vampires. The core conceit of the slayer: she sees the killer, not the person being killed. And she can't slay this one, it's in her mom. She can't look at her mom without it activating that instinct and it's driving her insane.

Fucking Harmony, man. she's the It Girl social influencer and who is she? What is the 'thing that is killing her?' That. She's basically exactly the same as a vampire. whac you see is what you get.

Cordelia survived. She became more than an It Girl. She developed friends and relationships and even though they fell apart, she was able to find a place to be and a reason to live outside of the one aspect of herself: being popular.

Harmony never got over that, she didn't find something to bring her out of that role.

This expands out to the whole show as it exists in the medium of TV. All these characters are classic archetypes and it is when they transcend those roles that they "Survive."

Look at spike. One off weirdo bad guy who is the season 2 miniboss and dies. Except he doesn't. He transcends that and DOESN'T GET KILLED OFF because James Marsters developed relationships and exerted himself. And Spike has become so much more than the slayer killer. He is alive because he found his source: being a weird fucked up little freak

People look at Tara and she see "Willow's lesbian" but it isn't until Tara causes a problem and exposes her family bullshit that they see beyond the role they ascribed to her, the role Tara herself was feeling trapped by. They are seeing Tara, not Willow's Girlfriend, also why we have the spell being about sight and not seeing demons. Buffy still has yet to *see* Spike.

[open-hearth-rpg]

Long Term Consequences: Great RPG Mechanics #RPGMechanics: Week Five

I read Blades in the Dark sitting in a Discount Tire. It was a long wait to get my flat fixed, as I hadn’t had an appointment. I still have a strong physical memory of working through the book with a luke-warm bottled water in my hand. I’d hit a rule and try to process the consequences of it at the table.

One of those things which hit me earlier on was the concept of Trauma. Basically when you burn through all of your Stress you suffer a permanent condition. It offers a role-play moment, a way to gain end of session XP. At first I assumed it was a substitute for madness and insanity, just based on the name. But it’s a death clock on your character, and, as I realized, it’s an easy one to hit. Stress is your key resource, you need to spend it. Blades stressed that fixing trauma wasn’t really a thing, at least not with herculean effort.

This struck me, given that I’d really only seen two tracks for character loss. Either you run out of hit points and die, or you choose to remove your character (through retirement, death, life changes, etc). This offered something new.

Later I’d see two earlier games which used a similar concept, but tweaked. In Night Witches, each playbook (Nature) has a set of marks. These offer a slightly different death clock, a set of milestones. There’s a shared set of possible marks among the different natures. All natures can “suffer the death of a loved one” or “witness the death of a comrade.” But it is the Sparrow who can mark “speak truth to power,” the Raven’s place to “share a premonition,” and the Pigeon’s place to “betray a friend or love.”

These are more descriptive ticks, but they’re still a countdown towards your character’s ultimate fate.

Impulse Drive also has a similar way of handling these long-term consequences. This takes the unique mark approach of Night Witches and extends it. Here marks are called Calamities. Each playbook has a unique set of these beyond one shared result (you suffer a terrible wound, illness, or debility). Like NW the idea is to have these reinforce character and offer different tracks for each playbook.

Here’s the Hound’s list:

A contact you have in the local criminal underground reaches out to you with some info or a lead.

You broaden your career options, take the other Work Ethic move.

The family or gang of someone you hunted is coming after you, hard.

You get a lead on a valuable target you hunted long ago but got away, but you’ll have to act now to follow it up.

A friend or ally you rely on is in trouble with the authorities, and is asking for your help.

Now or soon, you encounter a long-time nemesis with whom you have a long history of bad blood on both sides. They challenge you to a duel to settle your differences, and you must accept. When you duel your nemesis, roll+Volatile

I particularly like that the Calamities have varied effects. Some are good, some are bad. You can take one that gives you a new cool move, but eventually you have to start digging into the more challenging ones. They’re great for long term play where the pressure of this form of the Death Clock feels stronger because they aren’t all negative.

One of the things I love is when games present a thematic archetype, template, or playbook with enough room for players to make it their own. These are games that understand the genre tropes but offer you ways to tool that, but within that theme. Long term consequences present another way designers can give players the opportunity to make their version of the Warrior, Rogue, Wizard, etc. live a different life and die a different death from any other.

[songmingisthighs]

WHY I WENT MIA

spoiler alert : it's not alien abduction

tw : everything triggering, read at your own risk

so i almost comitted suicide several times around the 24th-25th

it all began when i was a child but we don't have time for that crap so i'm gonna cut to the chase.

Recently things has been pretty hard for me with financial issues and stress over what the fuck i'm doing with my life, not to mention the ridiculous pressure my parents put on me (in a way that i had told them would not be effective on me as it would just cause me harm esp to my mental health that both my parents, esp my mom, decide to ignore) and my extended family, and what i want, and it was all just ridiculous. Not to mention something specific happened recently that kinda just made me gave up because it felt like a betrayal, abandonment, and the way it happened was just so absolutely unfair and out of the blue like i wasn't even informed of what happened until i seek for answers myself. It was just horrible and i was really going to go through with it. I had suicide notes ready and everything and i could've decided to do it on the 23rd but it was yunho's birthday and i wasn't gonna miss that so my options were on the 24th or 25th bc my parents were gone and had anything happened, i wouldn't be rushed to the hospital.

I was alone and i felt alone despite having one last friend to talk to but that friend was just sooooo so so so far away and idk it felt hopeless. It wasn't until i accidentally hinted to someone about what i was gonna do and they figured it out and after a whole shenanadoodles (at first this person was like "i can't be selfish, i can't keep you here because who tf am i?") and some words used on me, that person accidentally canceled my self destruction. It was literally something that no one had ever said to me in a sense of the intention and the words used. It was literally "you can't go anywhere now, you're staying to write for me" and it wasn't the sentiment that i HAVE to live for this person now, but it was the fact that i was given a purpose. this person wanted me and they have plans for me and that gave me an immediate feeling of security. It's so stupid, i know but it happened. That was what happened and i'm still at shock because that person said they didn't even know that it would work.

if someone goes to you, telling you they wanna end their life, i implore you to NEVER say "don't do it, but i'm not gonna stop you". because that kinda feels like you don't care and by god, this person is already suicidal now you're telling them that YOU wouldn't care whether or not they leave ???????

i can't speak for other people with suicidal tendencies or behaviour but i'm so glad to have the friends that i have rn. I used to say i don't have much friends but oh my god after being open about this, i realized how many friends i have and how easy it is to ask someone to be your friend.

I'm sharing this to not upset anyone but because i want my blog to be a very transparent and open space. I don't feel normal because i don't see people sharing about their experience esp with suicidal behaviour and/or tendencies bc it's a taboo and it's potentially triggering. that's why i don't feel normal and it makes me think that since i'm not welcomed, i'm not like anyone, i should just not be here. Someone told me to remove myself from uncomfortable situations and i took it to a whole new level. It didn't occur to me how much people cared for me and seriously, i'm just so very thankful. I know i have a long way to go and i'm gonna have more hardships to come, but right now i feel like the people who i have around me can help me even by just doing stupid shit like sending ateez pics or telling a random annecdote or even frantically trying to find a topic that can distract me.

this space that i have created is a safe space. I personally don't get triggered by other people's experience but i get it. honestly, i want to make a safe, open space for people but i just don't know how to. but that's basically what happened to me this past week.

to everyone who are still with me today, i want to thank all of you so much and while i don't know how to thank each of you privately or directly, i just want you to know i love you so much. God the love i received these past couple of days has just been making my heart feel full and honestly it kinda feels like i'm gonna pee. but eh what do i know.

[itstheghostofmypast]

Hey babes, what's up? How you doing?

I'm... not that great actually. Grades are coming out, and I didn't do as well as I thought, so now my mom is calling me useless *family trauma go whee*. It's just that there is so much pressure to apply to foreign universities, which always involves having perfect grades, thousands of extracurriculars, fourteen start-ups, and a cure for cancer. I'm writing some fanfics right to kinda vent before I go back to studying...

BUT HOW ARE YOU? I MISSED YOU SMMM

Okay, so, I'm going to get straight to the point. It has been years. No, bloody generations and desi people ways are not going to change, so please don't let that get to you. Okay, so this is how it works, the older you get, the more complicated things become. Your personality, cognitive processing abilities and traits tend to lean towards whatever you are naturally good at- a thing most desi people do not understand (I am not hating on South Asian parents but it is a common trait). Though our parents are often like this because we come from deterministic countries where either being born rich or being smart enough to go abroad is considered as sucessful. Both these approaches are bullshit.

All my life I was the model A* kid of the entire family- you know what that got me in return? Cousins who hated me because their parents used me as an example for EVERYTHING and a childhood that is comprised of no hobbies, likes or dislikes, extracurriculars and actual friends. As I grew older, highschool came and even though I reached peak- my grades did not and boom: *Bloody useless* *God knows what happened to you* *You used to be a model student*.

To some extent I began to do everything to please others, since my grades weren't cutting it out for me anymore- hell I would even agree with what my 'friends' would say, only to be liked again. Gurl, I had people - my own friends- bully me for years, only because I thought, hey at least I have friends. My family wanted me to do engineering - yes, one of the three options all desi kids get. I could have, but at the end even though I got okayish grades enough to get me into an enginneeing college- my mental health was fked.

At the end, three brain docs later I was able to convince my parents how trivial these social pressures were- yes, I am grateful they agreed but even now, sometimes the desi vibes come out.

So, don't let your EXTENDED family or anyone else get to you. Hey, I came back on Tumblr bc writing makes me feel better, even if I PROCRASTINATE WITH THE REQUESTS.

Find a college/university that teaches what YOU WANNA DO- MOST UNIVERSITIES DGAF about what you got in subjects that aren't related to your degree, trust me.

Whatever happens, happens for the best, so- and try, just try to talk to your parents about chilling- or at least cooling down a bit- i know its risky but at least you'll know you tried and trust me, parents do think about things u say in the middle of the night. They are supposed to be your strength.

YOU NEED TO ENJOY THE MOMENT, MAKE IT ABOUT YOU, SCREW EVERYONE ELSE. IF YOU THINK YOU COULD'VE DONE BETTER, THEN YOU'LL DO BETTER NEXT TIME. BC SELF-REALISATION IS WHAT MATTERS. NOT STUPID ASS PAGAL PEOPLE LIKE BRO IM TELLING YOU PPL JUST EXIST TO PULL YOU DOWN AND YOU- Nah bruh you a whole ass bomb and YOU ARE ONE OF THE BRAVEST PEOPLE I HAVE EVER KNOWN. Do whatever you want- as long as it aint illegal or drugs, dont do that- But

F*** the haters

You deserve your peace of mind, everyone does. And family trauma is a part of you, a part that you will one day be able to supress and laugh at, because you know when you grow you wont be asking a kid named Salman or Ajay what grade he got in 4th grade math, you'll be more concered with if he's happy at school.

Ps: I love you, and missed you too and DONT BE SAD ABOUT STUPID IDIOTS- i messed up my last exam too but hey, as long as you and I are able to become GOOD, CIVIL AND USEFUL CITIZENS WHO CARE ABOUT OTHERS AND THE ENVIRONMENT, WHO CARES? NOBODY SHOULD CARE ABOUT WHAT THAT AUNTY OR UNCLE THINKS. PERIOD.

[tibli]

If there's one thing I really appreciate about my irl friend group in particular, it's that I never feel pressured to over-extend myself just to uphold some nebulous cultural expectations.

For example, it's pretty well known among them that I'm definitely on the touch-averse side of things, so I'm not much of a hugger unless it's a special occasion or it's immediate family. They've never held this against me, and I've never felt like I had to make myself physically uncomfortable just to make them happy. When we have get-togethers and some are saying their goodbyes, I'm always asked if I want a hug or not- the option is always open to me, but I don't have to take it unless I want to.

It takes out a lot of the stress that usually comes with social gatherings of other kinds, like with family funerals, where I'm expected to let older members of the family, who haven't interacted with me since I was a newborn, hug me and touch my shoulder like they have any right to.

I'm also the kind of person that needs breaks when interacting with people- socializing is physically and mentally exhausting for me, even with people I enjoy being around. It's always been like that. So, when the time comes where I leave the group to go nap on the couch for a bit, nobody gives me grief about it, and I'm welcomed back enthusiastically when I return.

It probably helps that I'm not the only introvert in my friend group, but I feel like, even if I was, it still wouldn't make much of a difference. It's just nice to have friends that respect your boundaries