#nothing wrong with feeling bummed out that something wasn't what you expected

[smellslikebot]

right before the "hlvrai" stream started, a mod in the wayneradiotv discord posted a reminder that their streams are for 18+ viewers only and, not to be mean, but seeing the way a lot of people acted during that........ yeah i can see why they'd want to call attention to that rule in particular 😭

[stop-talking]

You're his ex, but he's desperate for a babysitter. (pt. 4)

Mike Schmidt x fem reader

2.4k words + 300 word epilogue

Tags: 18+, mike x fem reader, no use of y/n, exes, enemies to lovers, slowburn? sassy mike, sassy reader, pet names, banter, angst, fluff, comfort, happy ending.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

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Mike sits at his kitchen table, trying not to nod off into his cereal. Today is a quiet day. A lazy day. His one day off.

Except, not really. There's always work to be done. He just has to figure out what today's work would be. He's caught up on laundry and dishes, the house isn't too much of a mess... Hm. Maybe he should finally fix the dripping pipe in the bathroom. Or the living room window that's been stuck for years. Or one of the million other things wrong with his house.

He sighs and goes to take a bite of his cereal, only to realize he forgot the milk. Damn it. When he opens the fridge, he stands face to face with a little blue dolphin stuffed animal. Right... Abby's still testing him. He leaves it alone, she'll see it when she gets home from school and assume her "spell" still works. Pfft.

Mike nearly drops the milk mid-pour when he hears the phone ring.

*click.*

"Hello?" He mumbles groggily, a little annoyed to have his morning brooding interrupted.

"Hey, Mike? You free at all today?"

He immediately perks up at the sound of your voice. It's been two days since he last saw you, and he honestly wasn't sure if you'd ever speak to him again.

"Yeah, uh... It's my day off, actually."

"Good. I'm using that 2nd favor."

Mike's heart races. If this favor is going to be anything like the last one, he was definitely up for it.

"Oh? Missing me already, sweetheart?"

"As if. I need you to build me a shelf."

A shelf? Well, that was unexpected. Hm. Better than nothing.

"What, like build it from scratch? Are you expecting me to buy the boards, or-"

"No. I have all the pieces. It just needs to be assembled."

"You can't assemble a shelf?" Mike scoffs, but secretly he's pleased. Sounds like you just want an excuse to have him over.

"Mike. You know I'm no good with tools."

No, he didn't know that actually. Liar. You definitely just wanted to see him again. God, he felt giddy.

"Mhm. Sure."

"Just get your ass over here, Schmidt."

"Woah, what's with the attitude, Princess? I'm here to help." He can't help but let some smugness seep into his tone. Okay, more than some. He's a cocky bastard and he knows it.

"I've been working on the damn thing all morning. Almost three hours now. Not in the mood, jackass."

Shit. You sounded sincere. And really pissed off. Then again, what kind of a shelf took three hours to assemble? The fuck was it? A jigsaw puzzle?

"Alright, alright. I'll be over soon. See ya."

Mike slumps against the counter as you grumble something incoherent and slam the phone down. Damn, what is he getting himself into this time?

Only one way to find out.

・○・・・・・・○・・・・・・○・・・・・・○・・・・・・○・

When Mike finally arrives at your apartment half an hour later, he feels a bit silly. He put on a nice shirt and trousers to come see you, and here you are in sweats and a baggy t-shirt. Figures.

"Call for a handyman?" He greets you with a teasing smile, holding up his old rusted toolbox as he makes his way inside.

"Pfft. Someone's happy to see me."

Mike can't really say anything to that, so he doesn't try. He is happy to see you, even if you have attitude problems and dress like a bum.

"So, I bought the damn thing from a friend-of-a-friend, who got it at a garage sale. I swear, it has to be missing some parts or something, because-"

He nods as you rattle on and lead him to your bedroom, but he's only half-listening. He looks around your apartment, taking it all in. It's been at least six months since he last came over, probably longer. It doesn't look to have changed much. He likes your apartment. It's cozy.

"Anyways... can you fix it?"

Mike pauses in the doorway of your bedroom as you give him a sheepish smile and gesture to something in the corner.

Holy hell. Is that supposed to be a shelf? Mike can't help but think that the hideous agglomeration of boards and screws would only be good as a fire-starter. It looks more like a pile than a shelf.

"Uhh..." He bites his cheek, desperately trying not to burst into a fit of laughter. Maybe you really weren't lying about the whole "no good with tools" thing.

He finally loses it when you groan and flop down on the bed, hiding your face in a pillow.

"Ughh... Laugh at me, whatever. Just fix it."

"Jesus Christ. This has to be the sorriest excuse for a shelf I've ever seen. Sure you don't want me to haul it to the junkyard instead?" He snorts, sitting down on the edge of your bed and looking with disdain at the half-assedly assembled shelf.

Mike immediately shuts his mouth when you glare at him. Oops, right, you're in a bad mood.

"I mean, uh... you tried?" He laughs, shaking his head in amusement. He still can't believe you're actually this inept when it comes to assembly.

"Get to work, Schmidt."

Mike yelps as you kick him off the bed, but doesn't bother retaliating. He just grabs his toolbox and sits on the floor, examining the so-called "shelf".

"Well, the first step is going to be un-doing everything you did."

・○・・・・・・○・・・・・・○・・・・・・○・・・・・・○・

You lie on your stomach in bed, chin propped up on your hands as you kick your feet in the air and ponder the sight before you. Mike's back is turned to you as he quietly works away taking apart the monstrosity you assembled.

"How long is this gonna take?"

"Well, If it wasn't so..." He trails off, glancing at you and choosing his words more carefully.

"...sturdy, it'd be a lot easier to take apart."

"Hm? What do you mean?"

He gives you an incredulous look and gestures to a series of nails in a corner where two boards meet. It does look pretty ridiculous, the sharp ends pointing out the other side. Not your best work.

"You put nails in it, sweetheart." He scoffs.

"How else was I supposed to keep it together?" You give him your best pout, and gloat internally when he has to turn away. He's absolutely infatuated with you. Even the back of his neck is pink.

"It comes with screws for a reason, ya know."

"There's a difference?"

He turns and gives you a flat look, and you laugh. Damn. You can play dumb with him, but maybe not that dumb. Noted.

Still, it's a little boring just laying there and watching him grumble and pull nails from wood. You can't really mess with him too much either, because you really do what him to fix the stupid shelf.

"You want something to drink?" You finally break the silence, under the guise of trying to be a good hostess.

"Pfft. Need some whiskey to deal with this bullshit." He snorts, pulling yet another nail free. He'd almost gotten one board off. One. This was gonna take a while.

"I was thinking more along the lines of soda or tea."

"Jack and Coke, then?"

"Mike. It's hardly past noon."

"So?" He scoffs. "For me, this is like... evening, or something. I dunno. Sleep schedule's fucked with this new job."

That answer makes you pause.

"What is it you do now, anyway?"

He groans, finally prying one of the boards free of the clusterfuck.

"Night guard. Told you already, remember?" He tries to shrug the question off, but you're nosy.

"Where?"

"Uhh... Freddy Fazbear's Pizza..."

"Speak up."

"Ugh. It's this stupid rundown hellhole pizzeria. Honestly dunno why anyone would wanna break in there anyways. It's a dump."

"What kind of a pizzeria needs a night guard? Or any guard?"

"The haunted kind."

You decide not to ask about that, simply shaking your head as you walk to the door. He's truly a loon. A loveable loon, unfortunately.

"Just tell me what you want to drink, Mikey, or I'm getting you water."

・○・・・・・・○・・・・・・○・・・・・・○・・・・・・○・

Mike sits on the floor of your bedroom sipping his glass of water and wondering how he got here. If you'd told him a week ago he'd be building his witch of an ex-girlfriend a shelf, he would've gagged. Now...? Well, he just wants to go join you on that bed.

"So are you really just gonna sit there and look pretty while I do all the work?"

"Aww, you think I'm pretty, Mikey? You smile, lying on the bed with your feet kicking in the air, giving him a look of pure adoration. It wasn't hard to do.

"Pretty annoying, yeah." He turns away with a scoff, returning to his work. If only he could get this stupid nail untangled from the other two... why would anyone use this many nails?

"You know, I think I liked you better gagged."

"Oh I know, sweetheart. I could see it in those evil eyes of yours." He can't help but smirk a bit at the comment, though. Sometimes he liked himself better gagged, too. He shakes the thought away and keeps working.

"Why can't you just get on hands and knees and beg me to take you back already?" You huff dramatically and roll over onto your back, letting your head fall over the edge of the bed. He looks silly from this angle. Upside-down.

That question nearly makes Mike drop his tools. Were you serious?

"Why? So you can laugh me off again?"

Ouch. It was true you'd turned him down the last time he'd tried it, but that was six months ago.

"Maybe if you used those big brown puppy eyes of yours on me."

That only earns you a grunt, so you verbally prod him again.

"Besides, why can't I do both? Laugh at you, then take you back? Sounds fun."

"Pfft. Fun? To toy with me? You'd probably break up with me all over again just for shits and giggles." He responds bitterly, still refusing to turn around.

"Mikey. Look at me." You roll back over onto your stomach and rest your chin in your hands as he slowly meets your gaze.

"I didn't break up with you just for shits and giggles. You know that. I'm not letting you sit there and wallow in self-pity."

Mike goes stiff from your words, but your tone is soft, and your eyes even softer. You're still giving him that adoring look. Damn it.

"Well maybe I'd rather wallow in self pity than admit you were right all along."

"You've had six months to wallow. Grow a pair and come kiss me."

He can't say no to that. Not when you look at him that way. He shuffles over, kneeling by the side of your bed. On his knees for you again, damnit.

You kiss him. It's different from the lustful, sloppy kiss you shared last time. This one makes you feel warm. You kiss him again. And again.

Mike really doesn't want this to end, but the knot in his stomach forces him to pull away. He has to ask.

"Why? Why are you doing this, I mean? Do you really want... to take me back?" He sputters, looking down at the floor.

"I'm not completely sure yet." You answer honestly, shifting and lying back on the bed.

Damn. That's not the answer he wanted to hear.

"Are you-"

"Come here."

When you pat the spot next to you in bed, Mike melts. He's a wreck right now, but still wants nothing more than to be with you, in every sense of the word. He silently complies.

"It's not about right and wrong, you know. As much as I love being told I'm right." You give him a soft smile, breaking the silence and placing your hand on top of his as you both lie on your sides.

Damn it. He'd done this with you before, this and so much more. Why was such a small touch turning him to goo?

"What isn't?"

"The breakup. It's about growing as a person. As people. Both of us." You lace your fingers with his, and can't help but laugh as his face reaches a level of pink you've never seen before.

"And what exactly am I supposed to be growing out of?"

"Pfft. I don't know, the emotional unavailability? The way you never made time for me? Constant irritability?" You start to dramatically list off his flaws, using your free hand to count on your fingers.

"Okay, okay. I get it." He huffs, and grabs your hand before you can make fun of him more. Instead, he guides it to his side, pulling you in a little closer.

"And you're miss perfect?"

"No. 'Course not. I have flaws too." You give him a sly smile, and start listing your own "faults".

"Too hot and sexy, too intelligent, too kind, amazing, sweet and caring..."

That's as far as you get before Mike scoots closer, burying his face in your neck and giving you a playful nip.

"Too arrogant." He adds with a laugh, wrapping his arm around you and letting himself melt further into you.

"My arrogance is one of my best qualities, thank you." You reply haughtily, sliding your hand up his back and into his hair.

Mike couldn't speak, even if he could somehow find the right words to say. Everything in this moment felt so right. His arm around you. Your fingers in his hair. He lets out a soft groan instead.

You aren't exactly eager to let go of this moment either, and just hold him for a few minutes. It feels nice to play with his soft brown curls.

"I'll do better. Please." He finally mumbles something to you, not bothering to move his face from where it's buried in the crook of your neck.

"Please what, Mikey?"

"Take me back."

He finally pulls back, just enough to give you a glimpse of those puppy eyes of his. Damn it. How could you even think of saying no?

"Yeah. Okay."

You both lean in for another round of soft passionate kisses, and Mike feels himself relax completely. His stomach unknots and his mind goes numb. For the first time in months, he feels completely safe.

・○・・・・・・○・・・・・・○・・・・・・○・・・・・・○・

"So does this mean you'll babysit for me again?"

"Go finish the shelf, Schmidt."

"Yes, Princess."

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♡ Epilogue ♡

Over the past few weeks, you and Mike had fallen into a sort of rhythm.

He never did end up finding a new babysitter, and besides, you're the only one who could ever get Abby to finish her dinner. You had to graduate her from daily witching lessons to weekly ones, though, convincing her she needed to study for the more advanced spells. Secretly, Mike was just losing track of which objects in his house were supposedly invisible. It was quite amusing to watch.

Mike's favorite part of the day was coming home to you already asleep in his bed, and waking you up with a kiss. He'd then either lie down in bed while you shower, or hop in there with you, depending on how you felt. Either way, he loved the view.

The conflicting schedules made things complicated, but you were able to work around it. Mike slept better with you holding him, and consequentially, was a lot more agreeable. He did his best to make more time for both you and Abby.

He even started to open up to you for once, letting you take on some of his burdens. This man sure had a lot of guilt. You were certain he hadn't yet told you everything, but he told you enough. At least you finally knew what the fucking NEBRASKA poster on the ceiling was for. Now you kind of felt bad for all the times you teased him about it the first time you dated.

As for the damn shelf... well, he finished it. It was still hideous, but it was functional. There were holes in it from the nails, and the wood had even started to splinter in a few spots. You couldn't bring yourself to get rid of it, though. Not after how much work you both put into it. Even if most of Mike's work revolved around un-doing yours.

It definitely wasn't a perfect relationship, not by far. But Mike never promised to be the perfect boyfriend. He just promised to be better.

And he was, bit by bit, every day. Better. ♡

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Author's note:

Thank you all for the love!! This was my first time writing a fanfic of any kind so I'm really happy so many of you enjoyed it. Feels good to bring the story to an end.

Feel free to send me a request, I'd love to write more fics about Mike. Or any other J-hutch character for that matter, Mikey is just my favorite <3

[bloggingboutburgers]

Hi! Hope you're doing well. I've got a coupla questions (sorry if they've been asked before and/or are dumb)

Can I be aroace if I daydream about The One but like most of the time it's paired with a fictional version of me not me actually? Or am I just tryna be something I'm not?

Cause like I'm married rn (arranged marriage! Huzzah for culture roles amirite) and it's. Not. Goin well. I act so toxic with the guy and everything he does is like taken as a threat. Everyone says he's a nice guy and he is, probably. But every time I see his face I'm tired. When I have to talk to him, I don't want to. I don't want to spend time with him. I don't wanna hug him or touch him or look at him. He's like super bummed out cause I don't wanna do any of those things or even just be friendly with him. In my monkey brain I think I've got it figured that if I do get friendly then it'll just keep goin and goin and then I'll have to marry-marry him (biblically, if you will). I'm confused if this is just cause I don't like this guy in particular or if I just don't vibe with the whole idea of this in general. Cause I've always dreamt of a soulmate I guess. So maybe I'm just tryna use this to excuse my toxic behaviour? (The toxic behaviour in question is a lack of initiative, failure to communicate and no reciprocity of affection and even instances of revulsion btw) (everyone also keeps pointin out that I get along well with all of his family and that it's just him that I have a problem with, so it's not like I have trouble communicating it's like I choose not to)

It's only been a month and everyone says I'm bein too hasty and dumb but I've been feelin awful for so long now because of this haha. Idek why I'm sending this to you I should just get over myself and be happy with what I got

Thanks either way yo

Hey! So sorry I replied so late... I wasn't sure how to approach this, because I don't want to pass judgement on another culture when I'm not part of that culture while seeing things from the paradigm of my own culture only like it's so easy. I see too many people do it and it rubs me the wrong way so to speak. But I'll say this... As an aroace I am definitely grateful myself that I live in a culture that doesn't force me to get married (knock on wood), because I'd definitely feel similarly to you, I'm pretty sure.

I don't think you're being hasty and dumb for not feeling comfortable in a situation you didn't have a say in. I don't think it's as simple as a "get over yourself" matter like everyone in your surroundings seems to be implying. With that said, I don't know if any of what I'm saying is helping because I have no idea how much area of manoeuver you actually have in this situation, really. Maybe "get over yourself and be happy with what you've got" is all you can afford at that point. Still... You're valid for feeling the way you do.

That being said, unless he's the one who personally originated the arranged marriage, I doubt it's entirely the guy's fault either – as much as this is something anyone should reasonably prepare for, he probably wasn't expecting anything different than the stereotypical way most people say these things go. Not that it justifies expecting things to fall into this stereotypical place without considering the possible variables, but... Yeah. I don't want to tell you to do something that would potentially put you in danger, so please definitely disregard what I'm about to say if that doesn't feel like a safe option to you, but I hope you can talk things out with him on the long run so that he understands why you're this way with him. Of course in an ideal scenario he should understand on his own, but... Yeah it's not necessarily as simple, right? And I know even my whole thing of "talking things out is key" is idealistic thinking and doesn't always work. But in this case I wish it could TwT

Either way, to answer your first question... Deeefinitely nothing wrong with that. If it's anything that helps you get by on a day-to-day basis, by all means, hold on to it. If all else fails that's still the best thing. I hope you can stay as safe as you can T^T

[valentineclown]

This was longer than I expected do if you're not looking to read anything long , skip it.

i honestly don't know what to do at this point. I'm gonna try not to leave anything out and if I realized I did I'll edit it.

But basically, I don't do my chores as often as I'm supposed to but it's also because I'm a big procrastinator and I begin to overthink the amount of things I have to do even if it's not the much. And it's really started to affect my relationship with my family because even when I do take the time to do the things I need to there's always something wrong with how I did it and I just feel like nothing I do is going to at least make them somewhat happy. Like ik my mom likes a clean house and when I do make the attempt to make the house look clean or neat, she automatically has to point out something I missed whether it be an unwashed pot that hadn't I gotten to yet or not sweeping and mopping. And that just really discourages me but anytime I try to bring it up I'm always labeled lazy which I can understand, in some situations with the dishes I can be lazy but being labeled as such 24/7 just hurts at this point. And I'm honestly tired of feeling like a just bum or whatever. Like just recently, I had joined the cheer team as a manager. And I knew there were going to be a lot of fun benefits too such as parties, competitions, and sleepovers at a hotel. And the coach just made it apparent to us that we'd be going on our first sleepover at a hotel after our Christmas break. I had brought it up to my father on our way back home then when my mother comes home he tells her and she says that I can't go. I wasn't personally involved in the conversation but I did overhear them talking about it and it kinda made me sad because like it's not just for me but a gift to the entirety of the team for Christmas and I basically can't accept that gift because I won't be able to go. And I've been wanting to get out of the house more but it seems like any time I do it's no because I didn't do something like a chore. That I can also understand because I didn't complete my chores but other than that, what else do you want me to do? Cuz even when I try to impress anyone it just never seems like enough. Like I can try to get better grades in math which is my weakest subject but no one cares.

And it's not just that, like I understand what they mean by I'm basically spoiled because I get so much of the stuff I want and I'm very grateful for it, I am. But downright being called selfish because I didn't do something right or calling me spoiled because I was disappointed by the fact I couldn't get a small piece of my hair bleached especially when I had asked you previously to do it and you said yes just when I was older, doesn't mean those things. I was just a little disappointed by it that was all but you had to make it into a bigger thing so now imma actually do something that you may not like but I have no other way of expressing myself to you and you may yell at me and I might begin to cry because I don't like when people yell at me. (ik it sounds like I'm being sensitive but that's just hoe I am) then we stop talking for a while, no one ever apologizes but me because apparently I'm the one that's wrong because I'm a child. Theres not much else I know to talk about so I may just l ave it at this and come back and add to it if I really need to. But this was something I really needed to get off my chest because it's just been eating away at me and it's hard for to ask my parents to get me a professional to talk to as we're currently on a tight budget.

[mtreebeardiles]

Bittersweet Symphonies, pt 1

What? Another fandom I'm late to? Who would've guessed!

Mostly character/relationship studies in this one shot collection as the mood strikes. I wasn't expecting to be walloped over the head with FEELINGS from this game

Also over on AO3!

Sometimes

I feel the fear of

Uncertainty, stinging clear

And I, can't help but ask myself how much I'll let the fear

Take the wheel and steer

--"Drive" Incubus

It was a feeling that hit all too often these days, creeping up and bowling him over when he least expected it.

Flashing lights, music a thrum weaving in and out of voices emanating from too many throats, meaning lost and garbled -- assuming there had been any meaning to glean in the first place. It wasn't as if he was uncomfortable with crowds; he'd been in tighter venues packed to the brim with writhing bodies, faces beyond the stage lights, hands outstretched, grasping for an idea, an ideal, an imaginary construct built from an amalgamation of rumor and half-truths. 

But this was Riot, not Red Dirt, not any number of dingy, shabby holes in the wall dotting the wavering borderlines of a city that only knew how to consume, how to eat people up and spit them back out, forever changed, forever marked, teeth prints dug in deep where eyes couldn't always see them. And maybe he hadn't played anything like those old bars in far too long, recent reunion stint notwithstanding, but being here still felt…

Off. 

Wrong.

Like he was out of sync, out of step, rhythm lost and he wasn't sure how to get it back. That strange feeling that may have been fear sliding through his veins and wrapping around his lungs, keeping him poised on the precipice, teetering on the edge of find your way back and never go back. 

Did he want to get those beats back? that fearful feeling asked. Did he want to sink back down into the dark, let the shadows claim him while this city did what it did best? Or did he want to break free of it, find his way to something else, something new, facing down the risk that always seemed to keep him frozen in place, the reality that nothing was guaranteed and maybe he wasn't good enough to step outside of someone else's shadow? 

If he stood naked in that light for all to see, what would it show? 

You need to stop holing up in your villa. Get a fuckin' grip, Eurodyne. 

A shake of the head, and the strobe lights hid the tremble in his fingers until he brought the cigarette to his lips, and the discordant screech of lazrpop blaring over the speakers and shaking through their bones swallowed his string of curses when he realized he'd left his lighter in his other jacket. 

Fuck. Butt held between his lips and he was frozen again in a writhing sea, lost, thoughts skittering further away from the pages everyone else seemed to be on until he may as well have been reading a different book altogether. 

It shouldn't have been like this; he shouldn't have been feeling so disconnected from the music, even if that music was like nails on a chalkboard, more parasite than earworm drilling its way into his skull. But even the overly synthesized electronica shit being peddled and mass produced these days had its place, had its value deep down somewhere, had its own ability to get people to move regardless of its inability to move him. 

He needed to find a fucking lighter. 

A push through the crowd earned a few shoves sent his way, few recognizing him dressed down with the glasses that served to hide a good portion of his face, but for all he wasn't exactly the tallest guy in the room he sure as shit wasn't the scrawniest. He held his own, path set, sights narrowed on his destination: the bar, far side of the room, where a beer and, he was sure, a damn lighter he could bum from the bartender awaited. 

He just wished there weren't so many fucking people between him and where he wanted to be.

Something symbolic about that, he thought, wrenching the cigarette from between his lips for safer keeping in his hand. Probably, anyway. Another chord, hints of a melody, but too faint for him to seize it and hold it, too easily drowned in the chaos building around him. Nothing eking out of this primordial soup anytime soon, creativity more liable to be strangled than birthed. 

He was about ready to start being less kind with his use of elbows when another group got in his way, one of their number nearly falling into him before a hand shot out and shoved, knocking the partygoer back into his friends. Kerry glanced over, blinking when he recognized his would-be savior through the glare of neon lights. 

"V?"

"Hey," the mercenary replied, and before either could say anything else the song shrieking through the speakers shrilled into a new one, whipping the crowd into a renewed frenzy. A smile tugged at V's lips and he shook his head, eyes landing on Kerry's before he nodded towards the exit. "Wanna blow this joint?"

Kerry hesitated. 

To say his feelings about V were mixed would have been an understatement. Physically, the guy drew plenty of attention. Maybe not in the classically handsome sense, his looks grounded by a stronger nose, but in presence. A magnetism that could swing from enticing to intimidating depending on the circumstances, unless you were the sort to find the blend of pretty and dangerous exciting -- then he was damn near irresistible. 

Or at least that's how Kerry saw it, anyway. If he were being at all honest with himself he probably would've tested those waters already, seen what sort of advances the man was open to, if not for one small little detail:

The ghost of his long-dead friend was living in his head. 

Can't believe that fucking asshole came crawling back out of obscurity fifty years later to cockblock me. 

Well, that was a lie: he could believe it. Johnny was spiteful like that.

Prick. 

Whether it was on purpose or not was neither here nor there.

"Ker?"

V's voice, equal parts amused and concerned, and Kerry looked up into those too pretty green eyes and made a decision.

"You got a lighter?"

"Uh, yeah?"

"Let's go." 

V huffed a laugh, not resisting when Kerry took his hand and dragged him towards the exit. 

Leaving was easier than scoring a beer, at least, and they stumbled out of the club into the softer neon of Night City's streets. Music muted as the doors shut behind them, fading with each step they took away, and once Kerry couldn't feel it vibrating through the soles of his feet anymore he stopped and popped the cigarette back between his lips. 

Two hands came up, one striking the light, the other cupping to keep the flame steady, and Kerry took a long, slow drag. 

"Thanks, kid."

"Anytime."

Another drag, smoke expelled in a cloud around him. He took the moment to look V over top to toe, noting that the other man wasn't exactly dressed for a night out. Dark pants, dark shirt, black jacket, a neutral enough ensemble to blend into the background, into shadow and smoke. His eyes caught on V's knuckles, the evidence of recent splitting and bruising, before making his way back up to the man's face. 

V quirked an eyebrow, one side of his mouth inching up in a crooked grin.

Kerry wanted to bite it.

"Busy night?"

The merc shrugged. "Something like that."

"Mhm?"

"Just some…reallocation of goods," V went on, eyes glinting with amusement. Kerry found himself smiling back. 

He wasn't used to people in V's line of work, freelancers for hire taking on any number of jobs whose descriptions ran the gauntlet of 'probably dangerous' to 'stupidly dangerous.' Not that he was one to judge, not after V's help with the Us Cracks shit, though the man had blinked an eyelash at his initial request. 

Still came to blow up the van, though. 

"All done for the evening, you think?"

Another shrug. "I could be." He cocked his head. "Unless you'd like to hire my services. Again."

Kerry chuckled and shook his head. "Nah, I think I'm good on destruction of private property -- well, for now, anyway. Got some things brewing…" He shook his head again. "Beside the point. Point is, if you're not busy now, we could hang out."

"'Hang out?'" 

"Go for a ride, go get some more coffee, I don't know. Something. Anything. Get the fuck away from here, y'know?"

"Was kinda wondering what you were doing here in your oh-so-subtle incognito get up," V mused, looking him over. 

"Hey, this look works."

"Uh-huh?"

"It's versatile," Kerry pointed out. "Understated, until I don't need it to be. Like now -- now would be a great time to just be Kerry again, y'know?"

V was smiling again, trying not to laugh. He held his hands up in mock-surrender.

"Okay, okay, I see your point," he said. "Not dunking on versatility any. Pretty valuable thing, that."

Kerry narrowed his eyes, feeling a grin start to curve at his lips. "Uh-huh."

V had the audacity to wink. 

"So, did you have anything particular in mind or?"

"You got a car?"

"…I have my bike?"

"Perfect."

Kerry gave an imperious wave of his hand, setting the other man chuckling again, but V obediently turned and led the way down the street a ways to where the bike in question had been parked. 

"Do I get to know where we're going?" 

"No." Kerry gestured for him to get on, V straddling the bike and starting it up. The engine purred to life, a far more welcoming vibration coursing through his body as he settled in behind the other man. 

"…but you want me to drive?"

"I'm driving in the way that matters," Kerry replied, slipping his arms around his middle as V guided the bike out onto the street. He pressed closer, lips to V's ear to ensure he heard him. "Just follow my directions."

The little shiver this earned him was just a bonus. 

He guided V along winding city streets and long stretches of highway, the only words passed between them Kerry's urge to turn and V's hum of acknowledgment. He didn't try to ask again where they were going, his last question whether or not Kerry wanted the radio on, and when the man said he didn't the quiet that fell between them was…

Comfortable. 

Intimate, in a way Kerry couldn't quite explain. The sort of quiet that opened itself to awareness of the other, of pieces sliding into place again and again, less a slotting of gears to spokes and more a living tessellation making itself again and again with each ripple introduced. V's chest expanding beneath Kerry's hands with each easy breath, the way his stomach muscles tensed when he leaned into a turn. The flex of his fingers on the handles, drawing attention back to blood and bruises dried and healing. No hint of cologne hit Kerry's nose, V's scent simple and clean, this fact tied to the other, to the idea that V was a shadow among shadows but solid in his arms, proof of life in the thrum of his body pressed to his, vibrating with the hum of the engine same as his own. 

And that awareness expanded as they drove through the night, Kerry keeping their path from repeating itself, and he could feel V relax into it. No decisions needing to be made on his behalf, a gift without words, permission and opportunity given to just…drive. Just move, trusting Kerry nudge him in the right direction, no need to question or consider anything beyond the bike beneath them, the stretch of asphalt and gravel, the way they moved in traffic and the way they moved when they were alone. 

And under it all, a melody, chord plucked and echoing, and finally Kerry could hear it, hum it, fitting in so nicely with the engine and the driver, and when a light eased them to a stop and V leaned back into him, into his countering vibration, Kerry drew him closer. 

"Is that a new song?" And V's voice was almost a hum in itself, a wondering, wistful thing, and Kerry could only smile at how it didn't detract from the beats he was teasing into existence piece by piece in his head. 

"Maybe," he murmured, low in V's ear, and he savored the anticipated shiver this time, the soft inhalation his voice evoked. Green light washed over them, and he gave V another squeeze, keeping him close.

"Drive."

[blackberryblueberry]

J, 2nd & 3rd meeting

The day after the first tryst J didn't text. We didn't have one another's numbers. I was the one to message him on Tinder to ask if he wanted to exchange numbers, and then he texted me asking if sexy texting was something I was into. Sure, I said. So he started telling me how much he liked my pussy, how wet it got, how it felt in his hand, and asked if I wanted to meet up for a quick thing. I didn't know where and how, and I said no. He kept texting the days after asking if I wanted to meet up for quick things, and eventually I told him I didn't like that he was doing that, and he apologized. "Hit me up whenever," he said. For sex, I guess.

I wanted him to ask me out properly but it didn't happen. Eventually one night after dancing at zouk I felt bummed and horny and I decided, fine, I'll just hit him up. It was early July. He was away for the fourth and we said we'd get together after he got back. One day after meeting my friends for karaoke I asked him if he wanted to watch a movie with me, and he cabbed over. When I saw him I thought, meh. He was good looking enough but when he opened his mouth to talk in that nasally self-effacing way it just didn't matter what he looked like, and when we kissed I'd taste something bad. Sometimes he'd say something interesting. He wasn't stupid and he wasn't lame and he had some interesting views on art.

He watched the movie with me. It was a sappy Taiwanese gay love drama. Not the type of movie I usually watch, but sometimes you just do something different. (For a week after I played the theme song to help me sleep.) Afterwards we had sex. He went down on me again, but it wasn't so good this time, he didn't finger me and didn't get me off and actually seemed a lot more concerned about his own orgasm. He had trouble getting it up again, and he fucked me a little bit, forgettably. He pulled out and shuffled up and inserted his dick in my mouth and I sucked his dick until he came. I had the thought, why didn't he ask permission? Nothing felt natural--afterwards, I asked if we could cuddle, and we did, but it felt very mechanical. During our conversation I could feel myself disliking everything he said. I talked a little bit about how lost and directionless I felt and he said something about how he thought it was important to enjoy life and try to have fun. It wasn't wrong in principle but he just couldn't say it in a way I liked.

No word from either of us for a couple of days. I found myself assembling a kind of hoe-tation, trying to keep plates up in the air, and at one point I texted him again to see if things were still viable between us, and he was receptive again. He said I was the only person he was dating in the sense that I was the only person he had seen more than once this summer, and I thought, he must really not care too much about dating, because if I was the most viable option he had and he was putting in zero effort, then he was truly helpless and hopeless. He'd text, "We good?" Or "Summer is ending and I'd like to see you" but never ask me out, never suggest a time to meet up. Always expected me to take initiative. So one day when I knew I was going to walk past the store he worked in, I told him he should come out and meet me, and he did. We walked around SoHo for a while, chatting, and I said, "I don't know what it is you want. Are you dating for distraction? I can't tell if you like me." And his response was effectively, "I'm sorry about that" and "Maybe my words and actions aren't matching" and "I can't control whether you don't like me."

And that was the end of that.

[gremjaylin]

I want to cry, I need to cry, but I can't get myself to cry

It's so hard to get my body to let me cry, even in private

And why do I want to cry right now? Because apparently my mother cares too much about a math test that doesn't even affect my final grade

Because apparently she doesn't want to listen to me when I say that I will get better before the midterm exams and final exams

She says I don't have enough time, but don't I have a whole month or 2 to study? Don't I have the time to focus on my studies? Maybe if you didn't take me outdoors so much, I'd actually try to get better with math and science

I'm always so ashamed and scared to ask for help

I'm scared to admit I don't understand something and I let myself suffer as I struggle to understand what is being explained in the book

I want to cry because I don't consider the test important

And I'm not alone in this belief as a classmate of mine even said "It's not really important, but we still have to take it"

It's so unimportant that if I missed a day of school where there was a test, I wouldn't be forced to take it the next day nor would I have consequences for missing it

Why is it that my mother cares so much about it? If you care about my future and my final grade, why do you degrade me, why do you insult and hurt me, why do you care about something that doesn't even fucking apply to the final grade?

Do you even care about me?

Of course you don't

You never did

When I said I don't feel mentally ok or well enough to go to school the next day, you acted like it wasn't a big deal

You acted like it has no affect on my studies

You just advised me to not talk about my family problems with anyone in the school

You didn't give a shit if these family problems are actually affecting me and my studies

You didn't give a shit to think that the possibility of you and my father divorcing is what's going to give me a horrible grade

You never cared about mental health

You never cared about how much pain I'm actually going through

You never cared about how demotivated I am, how much I hate school, how much I genuinely want to cry every night and day because I know that I'm going to school against my will

Every night after school, I want to cry and sob in my bed because I have to go to school tomorrow

On school days, I pray that I get sick so I can have an excuse to not attend

I told you I prefer to be homeschooled

I told you I feel I do better studying at home than at school

But you didn't care

You don't care if I genuinely studied and tried hard to understand and memorize everything but still failed

You don't care to try to lift my spirits

You don't care to say "You did your best" or "I will help you with whatever you need help with" in a kind and caring tone

No

Instead you hurt me by calling me an idiot, calling me the R slur, you demotivate me further and make me feel even worse by saying I'm just a lazy bum that does nothing but play

You don't know how much I genuinely want to die because of these things

You don't know how much I want to ask for help, but I feel ashamed to do it, especially since you're the one that said "You're a teenager, you're supposed to be responsible, you should do your studies by yourself"

I know you said I can ask for help as long as it isn't the entire book

But you need to understand that this is how I've lived my entire life

Scared to ask for help out of shame because I'm expected to do excellent work, because I'm expected to already understand, because I used to get the highest grades and scores in my class and I was proud of it and now I'm scared to show that I still need help

Idk if there's something wrong with me, but I do know that if you tried to be a little bit more kinder, if you tried to let me have my mental health breaks, if you tried to listen to me and understand me better, if you tried to actually care, if you tried to let me do it by myself instead of you reminding me

Things would've maybe been different

[lucidreamer-uwu]

IM HERE AGAIN! istg im obsessed with your blog its unhealthy 😭 i know the last request was long and probably very agonozing to write, but i cant help myself youre just so amazing so im back with another request!! how would the brothers react to an MC who one day out of the blue decided to fall and become a demon? like MC had discussed it with the brothers at some point but they never actually thought MC would go through with it 😫 virtual hugs from me!! 💓

HOW THE BROTHERS REACT TO MC's Fall

Assuming that MC became an angel after they passed on...

LUCIFER

Sure he knew that you considered your fall from grace but he never actually thought you'd go through with it!

He'd be surprised to hear the news at first, then he'd feel somewhat guilty. Maybe he and his brothers had more of an influence on you that he had anticipated.

Okay he'd be bummed out that you didn't pursue your afterlife as an angel but once he gets over it, realizing that what's done is done and that this was the reality and accepts it, he'd be all over you.

He has never seen this side of you before so he was excited to explore this new you.

MAMMON

Hmmm... Yeah, no.

Nope, nope, nope!

You are NOT allowed to fall even if you already did.

He could not believe that you actually went through with what you had talked to him about. He thought it was just a passing thought you had going through your head. He didn't think you were actually serious!

Cannot, and would not, accept that this is how you ended up.

Would be guilty all the way :(. He loved you so he always wanted the best for you. And he was sure that your fall was definitely not the best that you deserved.

LEVIATHAN

He'd think he saw you wrong or that he was hallucinating or dreaming or SOMETHING. Was he really seeing you right???

Completely speechless when he finds out about your fall. He can't even muster a stutter this time.

Would get depressed because he more or less influenced you and did absolutely nothing to stop you from ending up like this.

Wouldn't be able to focus playing his games or watching his anime because of what happened.

SATAN

He never really truly appreciated the Celestial realm because he didn't experience it all by himself like his brothers did. He never experienced being an angel either. So he was thrilled to see you in your new form.

You looked great before, but now? You were absolutely stunning to him.

He always felt like he didn't deserve you because you were always this bright angel and he has always been the purely born demon, so he kept himself from wanting you. But now? This was a totally different story.

It came to him as a shock that you decided to just fall like that out of the blue despite recalling that you mentioned your intentions to him prior.

Of course he felt bad that you fell, but he knew that there was nothing now that could be done. He had a firm grasp of reality so it was easier for him to accept this event compared to some of his brothers.

ASMODEUS

Now that you're a demon like him, would it still be considered inappropriate for you two to hit it off?

That'd be his little excuse to hide his true feelings of sadness and remorse.

For once, he actually felt bad for the things he had done to contribute to your decision of falling out of the blue.

He was not expecting this.

Despite always tempting you into doing not-so-pure acts with him, he always wanted you to shine in your purity. He thought you were absolutely beautiful just the way you were.

Don't get him wrong, you looked even more ravishing now. But deep down inside, he couldn't help but let his guilt eat him up. He wasn't heartless after all.

BEELZEBUB

MC...? You looked different. Beel was unsure of how to react to the new you. And was definitely more unsure of how to feel about it.

This was surely because of him and his brothers, right?

Poor bb would feel the utmost guilt when he sees you in your new form :((

Even though it wasn't very obvious, Beel tried his best not to influence you in the slightest when you were sweet and innocent. He wanted you to stay that way forever. This was the last thing he wanted for you.

He'd be pretty upset about it until you eventually win him over by convincing him that it was still you in that new form and you haven't changed in that regard.

BELPHEGOR

Mixed feelings would bubble up in him and would make him full-on ignore you for a couple of days until you force him to pay attention to you.

He'd explain that he didn't know how to act around you when he realized what had happened. He already felt extreme guilt after what he did to you before, and now that you've fallen, he couldn't help but feel that it was all his fault as well.

He wasn't really the obvious affectionate type, but he always cared about you. He was worried about you. He knew what it felt like to fall and lose everything. He was an angel before after all.

Would give you extra attention every time you two were together. And would drop hints that he wanted you to go back to how you used to be. But he'd eventually catch on that you were intentionally ignoring his hints so that he'd accept you for who you were now.

HI BB WELCOME BACK! HAHASHHASJKSD I'm glad you like my blog that much ^w^ and don't worry about requesting a lot, I love getting every single one of them! I really liked the concept of this request so I hope I did it justice! >:3

Anyway, here's your long awaited req! Sorry for the long wait; I hope I don't disappoint! @gojohater101

Lots of Love,

~ Em ♡

[ghoul333]

serial lover

chapter one(?)

pairing: billy x f!reader

wc: 2.8k

summary: billy wants to kill you, but you change his mind last minute.

warnings: angst, murder, swearing, fluff(?)

a/n: i used both their point of views so i hope it came out alright. i definitely want to write another chapter. hope you enjoy! <3

He looked at you from afar. Lurking in the bushes, watching your every move. It was pretty much turning into a daily routine. He wanted you, bad. Billy was heavily debating when to break in one of these nights to kill you. Lucky for him, tonight might be the night, your parents weren't home and your siblings were nowhere to be seen. Just you, sitting pretty on your bed and staring at the ceiling.

You were the perfect victim. It had been a few years since the first killing spree in Woodsboro. Everything for the most part had gone back to normal. They thought about it for a while, and considering they had succeeded the first time, Billy and Stu decided to give it another go. Only for this job was Billy on his own, Stu being with his girlfriend.

A kind, innocent girl like you? That would be fun. Though you had never wronged the pair, you were somewhat of a loner. Quiet but willing to help when needed. Might've been a distasteful move, but damn was Billy eager to hear what your screams sounded like.

And now that you were alone, it was the perfect time to play a game.

Only you weren't.

Your brother in law, Ian, was in the living room, watching a hockey game.

Billy got into a stance when he saw you getting up from the bed, figuring you would leave the room. Instead, you paced in circles. He looked down at your hands, you were flicking your index finger against your thumb, as if it was out of anxiety. You seemed to be contemplating something.

You looked at yourself in the mirror. Billy having to duck down so you wouldn't spot him. It would be a different story if he was dressed up as himself, you two were acquainted after all, having one or two classes together. But he wasn't exactly 'himself' right now, he was Ghostface. Though he and Ghostface were one in the same, you didn't know that. You would only see a masked psycho hiding in your bushes.

He was about to pick up his cellphone to call your house phone, but something stopped him. His hand was frozen in place. When he looked back to you, he noticed a change in your expression.

You were crying in the mirror.

Billy cocked his head. What the fuck was this? One minute you're fine and seemingly calm. Then the next minute you're crying as if something traumatic happened.

He raised his brows, surprised when you stopped crying immediately, as if on cue. Your eyes had been glossy but were now completely dry.

Holy shit. Where did you learn that? He thought.

You didn't look sad anymore. In fact there was no emotion at all and for some reason, Billy loved it.

—

You wiped the tears off your face and stared at yourself in the mirror. Taking a deep breath.

Was that believable?  I think so.

A part of you wished you had someone here to let you know, but this was something you needed to do by yourself. You didn't even know if you were gonna go through with it, but the urge wouldn’t leave your mind.

Hearing a loud cheer from the other room, you groaned in disgust. You had a hard time believing your family would leave Ian here with you. Especially after all the shit you've taken from him.

You could confidently say that you hated your brother in law. Your sister disappointed you, putting up with trash like him and you resented your family for tolerating it for as long as they have. For over a year, he had lived in your house. Being nothing but a bum. Always being a fucking asshole to you and your family, then making you feel like shit when you call him out.

He could get away with it too. The fact your father was rarely in town made it easy and you hated it. You hated him. You wanted him gone, for good.

You knew there was only one way. No matter how many fights, he wouldn't leave. Refused to.

If he was gone, everything would be fine. It'd take time for some people to heal, but this was for the best.

Thinking about it put a smile on your face. Even though the inhuman thoughts ashamed you, you couldn't help but let them excite you at the same time. Never in your life had you wanted to do something like this, but you craved to see that piece of shit suffer. This would be the only time, and hopefully you wouldn't get caught.

You opened up your drawer, pulling out some scissors, studying them for a few seconds before putting them back.

You weren't ready to get blood on your hands. You looked around your room, trying to find something easy and simple. You looked down at your rack of shoes. Suddenly, an idea popped into your head.

You pulled the lace from one of your old sneakers, you'd have to dump them afterwards but you wouldn't miss them. While you wrapped the string around both your hands, something came over you. You didn't even realize you were walking to the living room, until you were standing right behind him while he watched his game. At that point, your body was doing the talking. Fuck what was actually right. Fuck morals.

Billy watched all this, following your every move. He cursed himself for not noticing the other obvious person in the house. How stupid. If he decided to pursue you there was a greater chance he wouldn't get away. Stu would've had to come. You kind of saved him there.

Seeing the single shoelace in your grip and standing so close behind Ian, he was actually anticipating your next move. Which surprised him, you had him on the edge of his seat. You had opened his eyes in those last few minutes. You had him so confused.

He had been watching you for days, basically knew your day and night routine. So, where did this come from? You put on an act, even for yourself?

He couldn't deny he thought you were, somewhat, adorable. Many victims had been adorable, but being adorable doesn't mean shit to Billy. If he wanted to gut you, he would.

There were times where you would just sit and stare into a void, but he didn't really think anything of it. He didn't realize how fucked up in the head you really were.

He couldn't kill you now, definitely not. You were turning out to be just as insane as he was. Billy felt drawn to you. He was rooting for you.

You stood there long enough for Ian to notice your presence behind him. Not even turning around, he opened his mouth.

"What the fuck do you wa-" He didn't even get to finish his sentence before you wrapped the shoelace around his neck, attempting to strangle him.

Hearing him speak irritated the fuck out of you. You'd rather cut your own ears off, but why do that? He should just simply stop talking.

He was strong, but you gave yourself props for not wearing socks, your feet were planted firmly on the ground, and they weren't going anywhere. His arms were violently swinging, voice coming out in gargles. How long did I need to do this for? Maybe a plastic bag would've been easier.

It felt like forever until he quit moving. Eventually, his arms fell limp and his breathing stopped. You stood there for a moment, the lace still wrapped around him. Had you killed him?

You decided you wanted to be sure, jerking the shoelace against his neck just one more time.

Suddenly his arm flew up, grabbing the shoelace and trying to jerk your body forward. You begin to struggle against him, pulling the lace as tight as you could so he couldn't grip it, but he was able to overpower you within seconds. Yanking you over the sofa he had been sitting on, you groaned in pain as your back hit the floor. The air being knocked out of you.

Where did that adrenaline come from?

Watching you flip like that, for some reason, worried Billy. Even he thought you had him. He couldn't let this happen, he felt the strong urge to come to your rescue. Sure, some random guy dying by the hands of ghostface didn't fit the route they were trying to take, but Billy was going to protect you tonight. He needed to.

He quickly got up from where he was crouched, beginning to creep his way towards the house. He figured he needed to move fast considering how much smaller you were compared to the man you were trying to murder.

"You little fucking bitch!" Ian managed to seethe, voice extremely hoarse. He got up from where he was standing and grabbed you by the hair, making you cry out pain. Billy heard the commotion from outside, and the sound he'd been wanting to hear. He didn't like it. Why?

Why did it make him angry to hear you in pain?

You wanted to avoid eye contact with Ian, but he yanked your hair again, making you face him. The look in his eyes seemed hungry, and not in a good way.

He gave you a vile smile, before slapping you across the face, making you tumble to the floor once again. You slowly reached up, touching your cheek. A single tear threatened to fall but you quickly blinked it away. It burned, almost vibrating from the impact. You knew the slap was hard enough for blood to come through.

Fuck.

You figured you were screwed, if you knew he was gonna grab you like that you would've just duct taped him to the coach. You really did not think this one through, even though you had been thinking about it for months on end.

You felt his body heat centimeters away from you. Looking up at him, he hovered over you.

"Thank you for finally giving me a reason to do that." He said, his tone spilling venom. "I'm gonna enjoy this."

You just stared at him, you weren't scared or upset. You couldn't even be mad, you just attempted to strangle your sisters husband. What could've been expected? You probably didn't have a great chance of succeeding anyway, but you couldn't fight your urges anymore.

People like him deserved death.

You didn't have time to process another thought before Ian picked you up, throwing you against the wall. You yelped as your side impacted harshly against the wood floor. You didn't even want to look at him anymore, you had failed and were probably gonna die, or get beat into a coma.

You didn't feel him grab you again. You didn't feel him pin you against the wall. You didn't feel the corner of the table next you digging into your side. You didn't feel anything. Not even the tears falling from your eyes.

"Don't cry now darling," He whispered in your ear, you shuddered in disgust. "This is what you wanted."

His voice made you want to vomit. Cigarettes and cheap beer leaking off his tongue. Even with him up to your ear, you could smell it. He was so fucking close. Everything about this man made you sick. You couldn't understand how your sister slept beside this thing at night.

He held your body against his while he shifted his hands. They wrapped around your throat and squeezed, very hard. You couldn't breathe. You wanted to just let it happen but your body was thinking ahead of you, once again. You grabbed his hands, trying to pry him off.

You actually couldn't fucking breathe. You were going to die, staring into this mans lifeless eyes, hearing his heaving breathing...his body pressed against yours. You would rather get stabbed to death. Or burned alive. You just didn't want him to be the last thing you saw before you died. You didn't want to die.

I fucked up.

Maybe you were selfish too. You were better off just hurting yourself to ease the pain. You couldn't get him off you and it was painful. Your vision was starting to blur.

You used your feet to try and push him off you, but your attempts failed.

Unexpectedly, you fell to the floor with a thud. You quickly inhaled a large breath of air, a small coughing spell following. You couldn't hear or see anything in that moment, just trying to get up, desperately trying to regain your strength.

Breathing had never felt so good.

Weak and in pain, you used one hand to guide your way up the wall, while the other one held your throat. As you regained your vision and started to focus on your surroundings, you began to hear struggling. Lots of struggling. You were confused, you thought it was just the both of you. As you looked up, you noticed a cloaked figure on top of  Ian.

Billy had gotten into the house from your laundry room window, finding the entrance a few days ago when he was planning how he would kill you. He crept in, being as quiet as a ghost. When he turned the corner, he saw Ian pressing you deep against the wall. He watched you struggle and fight, a few tears falling from your eyes.

He tackled your brother in law to the floor, making him lose his grip on you. Billy managed to gain the upper hand quickly, getting on top of him and wrapping his hands around his throat. Ian kicked his legs, but it did no good. Billy was too far up on his chest, sinking all his body weight onto him.

You stood there and watched. You were confused and shocked on what was happening, on where this guy came from. You looked down, noticing a knife next to the person in the black cloak. You begin to panic a little inside, wondering whether this person was saving your life or here to take you both out.

It only then hit you that the knife and the black costume seemed way too familiar.

Oh shit...It can't be.

Was this, The Ghostface?

From what you and the rest of Woodsboro knew, that killer who committed all those murders years ago was supposed to be dead. So what was he doing here?

You snapped back into reality when you heard Ian trying to speak. Looking at the both of them, you saw Ian's arms swing violently once again. Billy had managed to dodge most the swings, his arms steadily pressing down on Ian's throat. He did take a few hits to the face though, but he had been through worse.

It wasn't until he started reaching for the mask.

Billy could only lean back so far, if he tried anymore Ian would gain the upper hand in a matter of seconds. He usually didn’t care, since they were going to be dead anyway, but he wasn’t going to kill you.

You noticed what was happening, even with Ghostface's back turned to you. You slowly crept your way towards them, until you could see Ian's face again.

His eyes were wide as plates and his skin looked tight as the killer pushed down on his throat. Ian's eyes snapped to you, making Billy turn his head a little to see you in his peripheral vision. You could tell by the look in Ian's eyes that he wanted your help.

Tough shit.

You slowly walked around the two, Ian was convinced you were gonna help him, beginning to reach for the mask again, fingers brushing the mouth, trying to find a grip. You kneeled, grabbing Ian's arms, pinning him down. Your gazed flickered towards the mask killer, to find he was already looking in your direction.

You decided to flash him a smile. Though you couldn't see behind that mask, Billy had the same expression.

You lowered your body down, until your mouth was leveled with Ian's ear. He was trying to fight against you, but he had no more strength. He was done for.

"See you in hell, fat shit." You spoke into his ear.

Gargles could only be heard, and the hockey game playing on the tv was basically non existent. The life Ian once had, was now gone. You slowly stood up, ghostface doing the same. You both looked at his lifeless body.

“I don’t know whether I should say thank you, or start running.” You said, letting out a laugh. It hurt like hell to speak. Your eyes moved to the masked killer and once again, he was already looking at you.

You both stared at each other for a few seconds, before he took a step closer to you. You didn’t back up, and for some reason you didn’t feel afraid. Billy reached out his hand, lightly touching your throat.

You weirdly didn’t mind the feeling, you weren’t scared of his touch, in fact, it was very gentle.

His hand trailed up, cupping the cheek that had been slapped. His thumb lightly rubbed your cheek and you couldn’t help but sigh.

“Thank you.” You told him, but he didn’t say anything. You knew he couldn’t speak, he wasn’t gonna let you find out who he was. If you recognized the voice or didn’t there was still a chance.

A car pulling up into the driveway made you and Billy snap your attention to the front of the house. He looked at you once again, seeing the fear in your eyes. He had to help you out some more, and you couldn’t be awake for it to work.

“I’m sorry.” Billy lowly mumbled, before knocking you unconscious.

[wind-goddess-eri]

Worry (Fujin x Reader)

I’m posting this on this page. Cause I guess I’m no longer using the one I og posted on. ^_^ 

-------------

It was a night like every other night, the difference was that Fujin was staying the night with you. You weren't sure why but you just didn’t feel quite right. Did you tell the wind god? No, Course not. You were thinking that he wouldn't understand mortal mental illness. You just felt like at any moment you can break down and cry. But You know how to hide it. That's what scared you the most. Not that your boyfriend would be saddened by your distress but the fact that you were good enough of a hider to even yourself. You strangely felt you were ok.

It wasn’t until you were starring out the window, disassociating from everything. Fujin looked at you from across the bedroom door. Worry filled his face. "Y/N, Is there something wrong?" You didn’t answer. You were thinking about the past, the present....even the future. It wasn't until you felt his hand upon your shoulder, did you snap out of it. "Y/N. You are crying. Tell me what troubles you?" Fujin asked you. You didn't realize you were crying at all.

"Oh! I'm alright. There's..." You trailed off as you turned to look into your loves eyes. That's when it hit you like a train. All the emotions you've been holding back for years have now broken through the wall you have put up. You broke down and sobbed. Fujin embraced you in his arms.You explained everything. What you've dealt with the past, how everything until that moment you have been absolutely terrified that somehow you would have scared him away and how even if you both do stay together are you both really together? He's a god. He enters the tournaments. He could possibly die and you will never know. and if you do how do you process that.

Fujin stops you for a moment. "Please, Y/N. You are worrying about too much too fast. Nothing will happen to me. I will never leave you. No matter on how sick you are, I will help you in every way I can. Even if I have to I will stay home with you, everyday. I don't want you to worry my love. Please, shhhh, Calm yourself." And that’s when you felt on your shoulder, a tear. By the Elder Gods you made the Wind God cry! You looked at him. His expression was saddened. "Fujin...You're crying. I didn't know Gods could cry." You really didn't know or expect it.

"I may be a God but I do have..emotions. I'm sorry. I hate seeing you like this." he explained. "I love you, Y/N. I will always be by your side. Now come over to the couch and I will hold you until you feel better." Fujin picks you up off the chair from the bedroom and you both sit on the couch. You didn't really realize within your despair that Fujin set up a nice little dinner date in the living room. He even had the fireplace lite. "Babe...When.." You were so amazed at the site but also a bit bummed that dinner was now cold.

[cherry-lipbalm]

survival of the fittest. spencer reid.

5.3k words.

masterlist

“ If they were to somehow get out of here alive, she was certain it would only be one of them. ”

three hours earlier

Y/N was ready to go home - more than ready. They'd gotten back from a hard hitting case in Boston, touching down by early afternoon meant they were expected back at the HQ, which henceforth meant piles of paperwork were in their future. Y/N knew her complaining would only go reprimanded by Hotch, so she kept to herself in her cubicle, shoved into the corner of the bullpen, and desperate to get the documents out of the way.

Over the scribbling of her pen, she heard the mutterings of Morgan and Reid's conversation beside the latter's desk not too far away from her own. She sighed in defeat, because she knew she wouldn't be able to resist joining them, especially when the opportunity arose to take the mickey at Spencer.

When it did inevitably arise, she pushed herself away from her desk and allowed the wheels on her chair to escort her over to the men. At the sound of jagged rolling, Morgan stepped aside to make space for her to insert herself, a snide smug painted on his face.

"Did I just hear the word 'Spencer' and 'girl' in the same sentence?" She asked, leaning on the armrest to shove her shit-eating grin into Spencer's face; he only rolled his eyes and gave an insincere 'ha ha'.

"Your ears did not deceive you, baby girl," Morgan said, receiving a smack on the arm from Spencer. The warning stare he gave him almost made Y/N stop pestering him. Only almost.

"Oh my! Spill the beans, who is she?" Y/N gushed, steering her chair even closer to the Doctor while Morgan watched on amusedly.

"There isn't a she," he grumbled, head bowed to his paperwork in the hopes that if he ignored the Agents they'd just go away.

"...a he?"

"No!" Spencer exclaimed, snapping his head upwards.

"Hey! It's no skin off my nose, Spence."

He groaned, then turned back to his work and allowed for Morgan and Y/N to exchange a glance as they both tried to hold back snickers at their friend's flustered existence.

She stayed huddled around with them for a few more minutes, but as soon as she saw the clock hit 5, she jumped from her chair and kicked it back to her desk. Announcing that she was off, she began to gather and pack her things. While she did so, she heard Spencer make the same announcement.

"You're off earlier than usual," she called back, "let me guess... Doctor Who marathon?"

Spencer's smile gave him away; Y/N chuckled and draped her coat over her shoulders, standing by his desk while he adjusted his satchel.

"Busy man," she commented, then proceeded to listen to whatever sci-fi related ramble Spencer was emitting, interjecting with exclamations of intrigue or surprise whenever she deemed suitable (they were all timed guesses, but she didn't waver once).

"...Christopher Eccleston is actually the second favourite, despite the fact that a lot of people skip his season, but he has a 52% popularity–"

"Wait, why do people skip his season?"

"Oh, because he preceded David Tennant. He's the favourite, with a 69% popularity."

"Ha, 69," Y/N muttered under her breath with a crude smirk. Spencer only gave a restrained smile and raised his eyebrows. The two fell into a silence, except from a 'thank you' Y/N said softly when Spencer opened the door for her.

The elevator button illuminated under her touch, and they stood in front of the steel doors, awaiting their opening. Y/N tapped her foot senselessly, and Spencer rolled on the balls of his heels.

In amidst the silence, Y/N looked up to Spencer and they exchanged a warm smile. The beep of the elevator distracted them, and after stepping aside to let people out, they ambled in and finally relaxed when the doors closed on them again.

"Today was relentless," Y/N sighed, checking her watch.

"Have any plans?" Spencer asked, out of courtesy.

"Well, I have to head to the repair store to pick up my phone, but after that there's leftover Chinese food in the fridge with my name written all over it," she chuckled.

"What happened? To your phone?"

"Morgan happened," was all she said. Spencer joined in on her judgement even though he didn't know the story, he did know that 'Derek Morgan' was simply a reason in itself that didn't warrant an explanation. Then, they lulled in the return of silence.

It wasn't until the elevator jerked and came to a sudden stop that the two spoke again.

"That's not right," Spencer muttered, and he immediately began to jab at the ground floor button before Y/N smacked his hands away, because she was already deep in a panic, so it was even worse when the next astounding jerk hit. She screamed when they were thrown off balance, and hoped she hadn't got a concussion from where she collided with the back wall upon the motion.

"What the hell?" She panted. They came to a still, but it made her even more nervous because she knew they hadn't been in there long enough to reach their floor. That, and the fact that they had just ripped through the air at about a hundred miles per hour.

Spencer's eyes furrowed, and he licked his lips in the way he did when he was focused on something. Judging by the way he assessed the doors, Y/N thought he was about to pull some thwarted stunt, or more likely reel off some facts about steel.

"I think something's wrong," he mumbled.

"No shit, Sherlock,"

"Ah, elementary my dear Watson," Spencer replied so quickly that Y/N was almost inclined to believe it made any sense.

"Did you know that Sherlock Holmes never actually said that? Sir Arthur Conan Doyle never wrote those words, they were only adapted into the movies years later-"

"Oh my god, Spencer, are we stuck in this elevator?" Y/N shrieked, her knuckles whitening under her tight clutch of the hand rails on the wall: half from fear and the other from frustration.

"Oh, uh, yeah, I think so."

Upon Spencer's bluntness, she stepped forward, desperate for any attempt of an escape plan, she began pressing the ground floor button repeatedly; when that didn't work, she resorted to aimlessly smashing all the buttons on offer. 

"That's– that's really not gonna do anything," Spencer said in the background.

"Do you have a better idea?" She snapped, turning to him with a glare before resuming her actions.

"Try the - try that one!" He pointed to the red button with an alarm bell engraved on it, and Y/N felt stupid under his stare for not noticing it before. She pressed it, and the ringing noise that emitted from it seemed to do nothing but that: ring. She was certain someone was supposed to come to their aid through a speaker, so she pushed it continuously, but derived nothing further. At least she gained some comfort in the panic of Spencer's voice that told her he was shitting himself as much as she was.

"It's not doing anything!" She cried, and when he leaned over her and pressed it too, she bit her tongue and raised her eyebrows to tell him 'see?', infuriated at the fact that he thought she could be somehow pushing a button wrong. But, then again, she'd have been even more angry if he'd done it and it had worked.

When it didn't, she alternated to the next best thing.

"Help!" She yelled, slamming her palms against the doors. She didn't know what floor they'd been wedged at (or even if they were just floating in some space between levels), but someone had to hear them; they were bound to...right?

Spencer seemed to think so at least, because he was joining her in pounding his fists on the steel. Sooner rather than later, the harsh echo made Y/N's ears ring, so she stopped and took a step back.

"Well, this is great," she sighed, slumping in a lean on the wall as she rubbed her temples.

"I'm gonna miss Doctor Who," Spencer whined, pouting.

Y/N just rolled her eyes at him and told him to call somebody. She was sure she'd seen JJ just before they left, still huddled in her office; hopefully she'd be able to call maintenance and they could be released from this death trap of a machine.

"I can't, my phone died. Use yours."

"What?"

"My phone's flat, can you use yours?"

Y/N just stared at him. She decided to give him the benefit of the doubt because the adrenaline rush of panic can make memories a bit hazy, but her skin was flustering under the rage she was feeling, her forehead was already beginning to perspire and the walls were so small and entrapping and - is it hot in here or just her?

"My phones at the store," she reminded him through gritted teeth, and watched his composure fall in both comprehension and defeat.

"Great," he remarked.

"Oh, like it's my fault?"

"Well, it's not mine."

"And it's not mine either so don't talk to me like that!"

It was only a short exchange, but it made Y/N's blood boil; if they were to somehow get out of here alive, she was certain it would only be one of them.

Spencer gulped, and Y/N was sure that had he the opportunity to he would be storming away right about now, but unfortunately for the both of them that wouldn't be happening anytime soon. The wonderful reality of this hitting Y/N, she kicked off her shoes and planted her bum down on the floor.

Spencer looked at her curiously while she did this, then quirked his lip and proceeded to do the same. He used his satchel as a pillow to support his head, and sighed loudly (it seemed deliberate just how exaggerative it was).

"No one is ever gonna find us here," Y/N said.

"We're not dying–"

"You don't know that. We could be suffocating as we speak-"

"Suffocation is impossible in elevators: the cars are designed not to be airtight and there's vents that allow air to move in and out," he pointed up at the grated opening above Y/N's head. At being proved wrong by Spencer and his big, unfathomable brain, she crossed her arms much like a stroppy toddler and even pouted her lip.

"We could still die," she mumbled.

"The statistics of that are still very unlikely; in fact, the people that die the most in elevators are elevator technicians themselves. An average of 26 people die in elevators every year in America–"

"And you're ready to be one of those 26?"

"We're not going to be. We won't suffocate, and it hasn't fallen."

"Yet," she said. "Plus, theres other ways to die. Like, I don't know, murder perhaps?" She said with a potent glare in his direction. He gave her a blank stare partnered with a sarcastic smile, one that only made Y/N more devoted to her other-ways-to-die initiative.

"We just have to wait a while... Did you know the longest duration of time someone was stuck in an elevator was 41 hours? Nicholas White. And all he had to eat was a packet of Rolaids."

More than accustomed to tuning out Spencer's rambles, Y/N barely heard what he was talking about, in a dazed trance where she was focused intently on where the paint didn't match the wall, she was so invested she almost missed what he said.

"Wait... oh my god. Do you have food?" She asked, sitting up from her subsided posture.

Spencer's face softened in dread, which didn't bring any aid nor optimism to their situation.

She watched him sit forward, shoving hands into the pockets of his blazer, coat, trousers and pulling out nothing but a few crumpled pieces of paper. Y/N matched him with an empty gum wrapper and a Walmart receipt displaying a concerning amount of pregnancy tests she had purchased last month.

"Do I even wanna know?" Spencer asked, chucking it back to the ground with a grimace as if it was riddled with germs (it probably was but, still).

"All you need to know is that I'm not pregnant," Y/N scoffed, almost amicably, but her eyebrows creased and she was back to a fuck everything this sucks expression in less than a second.

"Well we can't survive on this."

"You really haven't brought any food?" Spencer pestered.

"No, I had Chinese leftovers on the cards for tonight. And I don't see you offering anything up; what's your excuse?"

Spencer only groaned, again. He kicked his feet out and let his head fall onto the wall back in the same place. He ran a hand through his hair, and the scarce gel he had used to keep it in place disassembled around his face in random strays of curls. The sight of him relaxing like he was settling in for the night didn't appease Y/N one bit.

While Spencer closed his eyes, Y/N got to her feet and decided slamming on the door again was a better pastime. Spencer, however, did not agree.

At the banging, Spencer's eyes shot open and his body shook in alarm. His eyes darted around the space frantically until they landed on Y/N's figure aligned with the doors on which she was unleashing hell. If yelling could open an elevator, they'd have been out in a jiffy.

"I think we've established that doesn't help," Spencer said.

"Then you help!" She shouted, continuing the thrashing of metal.

"How?"

"I don't know!" Her shriek echoed, and she yet again gave up on the violence. "Use that big brain of yours and find us a way out of here."

"The 7 steps to surviving being stuck on an elevator are fundamental; we've already done them. They include pressing the open button, the alarm and call button. We still have our light source, otherwise finding one would have been number two. We've tried yelled for help. The only one we haven't done is stayed calm," he said with a heavy emphasis in her direction. Currently, she was the epitome of panic.

Y/N furrowed a brow at him, "That's six. What's number seven?"

She watched Spencer inhale deeply before he told her, "wait it out."

Y/N felt her heart sink. The possibility of her going insane while being confined within this space was only increasing as the minutes passed by. And with that, she felt like oxygen was depleting alongside it. She took a big breath to remind her that there was still air to breathe, and Spencer caught sight of it.

"Are... are you claustrophobic?"

"No!"

His eyes widened at her outburst, and he even raised his hands in defence should the situation present itself, which was looking pretty inevitable.

"I'm not, I just... get a little... panicked, that's all."

"You don't say," he murmured, and —with a grunt— got to his feet again. He treaded towards the damned doors. Y/N thought he was going to bang on them again, and she took front-row seat on the floor to watch the imprudent, futile attempt. Instead, Spencer's long arachnid-like fingers dug into the crevice of the doors and he tried to pry them open. This was an even vainer approach; his strained groans showed such.

"It's no use. We're gonna be here for a while. I can offer you a juice carton," Y/N spoke, making Spencer turn attentively at the word 'juice'. He looked down to where she was rummaging through her bag and depositing a few random objects while she did so. In a very Mary Poppins like fashion, the entities incessantly kept coming and coming, gathering in remarkable piles on the floor. There seemed to be more things than space available, but then they were trapped in an elevator and space was one of the many luxuries the agents realised they had taken for granted. Despite his astonishment at the growing belongings, there seemed to be a concerning lack of food present.

She was, however, holding out an apple juice carton, and Spencer figured that you get what you're given. So while her attention focused to the remnants of whatever was in her bag, Spencer punctured the carton with the straw, and began sucking. He made a squeal of surprise and relief when he saw her pull out a feebly wrapped, half eaten bag of crackers.

"Oh, I forgot about these," she announced, with the first smile Spencer had seen from her since the elevator had broken down.

He leaned down to grab the bag, dusting off the sprayed crumbs and then took a seat to Y/N's left. He left space between them for chivalrous purposes and also to allow space for the bag of crackers to sit.

They made attempts to ration the snack, but it soon developed into an every man for himself situation when Y/N noticed Spencer had started to take two at once.

She wasn't even hungry anymore, but the hunger for beating Spencer at something prevailed and disregarded any logical thought that they ought to save food, so she dove in again for another cracker. Unluckily, she did so at the same time as Spencer, so it made for an awkward encounter when their hands collided but neither was willing to give up their slot in the bag.

Eventually (because they didn't want the other to notice their blush), they gave up when time ran too long and reached a compromise with halving the cracker. Y/N gave Spencer the bigger half of her failed equal snap, but neither of them addressed it.

Neither of them addressed anything actually, for the next... god knows how long they were cooped up in there. They sat in a pleasant silence, free from any awkward glances or trepidations: it was both from the fact that they were in their own heads, and a serendipitous comfort in one another.

"I'm sorry you're going to miss your Doctor Who... thing," was what broke the silence.

"Oh, it's okay. I can just watch it on repeat tomorrow."

"Okay," Y/N laughed softly, and they floated into another quiet.

"I'm sorry you're stuck in an elevator."

"Ha! Me too."

"When we get out of here maybe we can go for Chinese food," Spencer suggested, craning his neck to look at her with a discreet smile.

"Sure," she agreed. "By the time we get out my food at home might have rotten anyway."

And then time after that just... passed. In Spencer's satchel he had an uncanny assortment of reading material to thrive on, and amid her odd collection of pretty much everything she had ever owned, Y/N found an old MP3 player and some earphones (only the left ear worked, but it was as good entertainment as she was going to get).

There comes a point, though, when one person can only listen to so much music from their teen years; Y/N's taste back then was... questionable, to say the least. And her earphone seemed to agree with her, because it gave out just when the unmistakable sound of an NSYNC song began.

"Ugh, just when it was getting good!" She complained, tugging the bud from her ear and throwing it onto the miscellaneous pile.

Spencer's head quirked to Y/N, but his eyes only followed after he had finished a sentence on his page. When he did, he saw her curiously leaning over his shoulder and squinting at the words.

"You can borrow it if you want," he said. "This is my third time reading it and I have others."

He gestured to his pile, which had evolved into a makeshift bookcase in the corner of the elevator. A few pages were torn, and the spines were so worn down that she could barely make out what the titles were. Not from a lack of TLC, but rather copious amounts of it; having been read over and over again. 

"No, it's okay. You continue, I'll just... meditate, or something."

"It's a good book," Spencer said, and he sounded like he was trying to persuade her, so she gave in and nodded. Readjusting her posture, she focused again on where the paint didn't meet the wall as she listened to the one thing she thought she wouldn't ever be able to stand: Spencer Reid's voice.

———

Which, to her and Reid's surprise, she found quite calming. Her hidden envy and not so hidden annoyance with his ability to reel off facts and wisdom like he was only recalling what he had for dinner hindered any fondness Y/N could associate with his voice. Until now, that is.

He was reading Strangers on a Train, supposedly his third favourite book, and they were reaching "the best bit" according to Spencer, but then every bit within the past forty five minutes since he'd started reading had been "the best bit", so Y/N wasn't sure.

But she's pretty calm, as calm as she can be stuck in an elevator, so she's actually thankful she has Spencer of all people beside her. She knew that if Morgan was in his place they'd have attempted murder at least a couple times by now; not to say that Y/N hadn't considered stabbing Spencer at all, but there's only so much damage a blunt pencil at the bottom of her bag could do.

So, she's calm. She's barely following the story because she only joined in halfway through, but she's grasped the basis of it because Spencer reads so eloquently and so well that he's practically painted the vividness of the narrative for her, even though he vouches it's down to Patricia Highsmith's words, which is true, but Spencer has a role in it too.

One thing Spencer recites makes Y/N wonder why she's never had him read to her before.

"People, feelings, everything! Double! Two people in each person. There's also a person exactly the opposite of you, like the unseen part of you, somewhere in the world, and he waits in ambush."

The story portrays an uncanny resemblance to the plots of the abundant crime scenes they analyse daily (Y/N wonders how Spencer comes home from work only to read about the same gory instances): the same mannerisms, behaviours and intricate understanding of criminal attitudes. It's accuracy is so astounding that Y/N asks if the author was ever a profiler of sorts.

Although it's selfish, because Y/N is not the real victim, she wished there was some way Highsmith's words could spring into real life and provide tainted rose coloured spectacles to which she could observe reality through. In some sick way, Y/N needed to see beauty in things like murder. She sometimes forgot that what they were doing had a purpose, and they tended to be the good guys. But there was no writing beautiful enough for Spencer to read and glorify the crimes with.

But even Y/N thinks Spencer's reading could help her see life through more of the silver lining rather than shrouded by the dark cloud that accompanied it.

The moment of rare serenity within Spencer's words is suspended, however, when he suddenly stops with no obvious justification. Y/N wonders if she's missed something profound within the story again so she goes to read over them on the page this time (because she's been rather entranced in Spencer's voice rather than the actual words), except when she looks up she sees a look of horror depicted on Spencer's face: one that doesn't register with her primarily because what's happening in the story is rather quite mundane compared to the dismay on his face. It's so poignant that she thinks something must be fatally wrong.

"What is it?" She asks, sitting up (and away because she thinks he may be about to vomit. But no, the real reason is even more horrific).

"I need to pee."

Y/N gasps; she hadn't even conjectured this predicament. It was a basic human necessity, how had she not anticipated this would happen? At first she thought, hey it's not that bad, better him than me— he can stand. Until she realises that there isn't really anywhere to stand.

"Oh no," she whispers, and he looks at her dauntingly. "You shouldn't have drank that apple juice."

"What was I supposed to do, bathe in it?" He scorns, and the two connect in an unwavering exchange eye contact with one another. Y/N dreads looking away in fear of what he'll do when she has her back turned.

So, like I said, Y/N was pretty calm, and I'd say Spencer was too; reading was a delight, and he found Y/N almost as endearing (almost). Life was bearable until Spencer needed to pee.

And it is here that they throw all peace out the window (if there was one) and give up on step number seven, and instead say hello to their old friend step number five: frantic yelling.

The energy pent up from lazing around reading and being read to is released fairly effectively. Y/N thinks she's never screamed so loud in her life, and Spencer knows he hasn't: entrapment and a full bladder can take one hell of a toll on a man.

And when the profusion of footsteps and the clanging of doors sounds, it is glorious. It is what they imagine heaven to sound like and more. Y/N collapses to the ground in relief, and Spencer throws his hands up in a prayer of thanks (even though he doesn't necessarily believe, but he is just so high on adrenaline and the discomfort of needing a wee that he'd just about believe anything now if it meant he could get to a bathroom).

"You guys okay in there?" A voice calls in from above them (Spencer genuinely thinks it's God) and Y/N has never been more happy to hear Derek Morgan.

"We're good! We're good! Oh my god, get us out of here please!"

"Right on it, baby. Bet y'all thought you were gonna die in there, huh?"

"Worse," Y/N called, "I thought I was gonna have to see Spencer's dick!"

Morgan laughed (music to their ears: any voice that wasn't each other's fit that criteria in that moment), and then told her he didn't want to know. Spencer and Y/N heard him holler behind him, and even more footsteps approached. Y/N couldn't see much from the slither between the doors that had just been pried open, since they had fallen a considerable distance from their floor. What she could see was only half of Morgan's face while he knelt on the ground.

"What happened?" Spencer asked, trying to gain some understanding for the reason behind missing his Doctor Who marathon.

"Power cut. The whole city's in blackout."

"You're kidding," Y/N replied, then turned. "A whole lotta people just risked that 1 in 26."

"Us included," Spencer said.

They recognised the voices of the maintenance team, and even a few uniforms of firefighters that worked on opening the doors with as much force as they could muster. Y/N looked again to the wall and paint mismatch, finding it too unsettling to look at their rescue attempt (that had way too much potential to go wrong) and even more unsettling to look at Spencer who was practically cradling his crotch.

"Ladies first!" A fireman called, and his hand reached into the space they had managed to (barely) increase, hoping that it wouldn't prove to be too difficult. From what Morgan told them, Spencer wouldn't have any trouble getting through it if they had halved the space ("the kid's a sherbet stick, I'm telling you").

"No, we've got a man here who's about to explode," Y/N joked, forgetting that the word 'explode' is a term one should use lightly within the headquarters of the FBI. She was blissfully reminded of this when the few surrounding agents brandished their guns. They almost didn't let them out until Spencer yelled that if he didn't get to a bathroom that instant he would give them a real reason to get their guns out.

So he was lifted out first, falling into Morgan's arms the chance he got to. He, somehow, managed to wait until he saw Y/N definitely leave the elevator before racing off down the hallway. Maintenance didn't even bother telling him that the doors have been locked because officially work finished three hours ago; they figured he had enough vigour in him to knock a wall down, never mind a door.

"Are you alright?" Morgan asked Y/N, lifting her up onto her own to feet. She's given a shock blanket, which is a pretty cool souvenir.

"I'm here, aren't I?"

"Miraculously. I don't know how you survived in there with him; I'd go insane."

"Eh," she chuckled, "he's not too bad."

———

After gathering their belongings, Y/N and Spencer make their way to leave work, again.

Morgan's nonchalant explanation of the blackout is in no way accurate to the genuine portrayal of, what Y/N can only describe as, a thriller movie come to life. She's looking out the wide scale windows in the bullpen room and can only see her reflection. It's creepy. Skittishly, she jumps when Spencer's image shows up behind her own. 

"Jesus, haven't I had enough near death experiences tonight?" She asks, holding a hand over her heart that she's sure just kickstarted (for various reasons).

"Sorry," he laughs. Placing his hands in his pockets, Y/N can sense he's more relaxed now that he's peed and no longer trapped within the restrictions of one metre.

They smile, then look out again to the darkened abyss before them. Y/N has never seen the city so quiet, yet she knows it's anything but. Once she steps outside it's bound to be hectic central.

"You normally get the subway, what are you gonna do?"

"Oh, I guess I'll just walk," Spencer shrugs.

"Absolutely not. I'll drive you home."

"Oh, no, you don't have to do that—"

"Spence, I just spent the last three hours in a confined space with you, I'm sure I can do twenty minutes more," she said. "Get your stuff ready, we can head off now."

She swung her bag over her shoulder and turned to walk out the bullpen, her heels reverberating throughout the room. Spencer watched her stride out by her reflection in the window, as to not be caught staring.

"If my car breaks down I'm gonna commit murder!"

Spencer laughed loudly, which made Y/N smile as she passed the kitchenette. When he continued to chuckle to himself he realised he wouldn't mind another three more hours stuck with her— at least he'd have an excuse if the car broke down. Maybe if he set off now he could get there in time to beat Y/N to her car and slash the tyres. He kindly reminded himself that that's illegal while he retrieved his satchel off the back of his chair and strutted out the office.

He wasn't too far behind Y/N when he suggested getting a Chinese on the way back.

"Is that a date?"

"If eating a Chinese takeaway in your car is your idea of a date," he sang.

"It very much is," Y/N grinned irrefutably.

He held the door open for her, she said thank you, and their giddy (dare I say lovesick) smiles dropped when they faced the elevator.

They've taken the stairs every day since.

fin.

[pogueswrld]

I heard you’re looking for requests so how about makkari x fem reader where reader start distancing herself from makkari because she’s secretly learning sign language so she can confess her feelings for makkari and surprise her with a date

yess my first anon request!! tysm for this it was so much fun omg

*•.¸♡ silent love ♡¸.•*

pairing: makkari x fem!poc!reader

summary: reader and makkari have been friends —more than friends— for a while, but makkari feels like she might've done something wrong when the girl she likes starts avoiding her, maybe it's time for a confrontation.

warnings: mostly fluff, a bit of angst and some curses <3

note: I literally have nothing to say except enjoy this, I hope I lived up to your expectations nonnie <33 sorry it's not that long ://

When living an eternal life, it was easy to forget that you're alive, notice the little things and geniuenly enjoying them. It was something Makkari had fallen for occasionally, but then again y/n was always there to help her out of them.

They're by the beach, y/n had dragged Makkari out here to watch the sunset and spend some quality time together, claiming that her visiting her college friend in the Amazon for a few days caused her to miss her so much more than she thought.

Truth is, when Makkari told y/n she's going to see her friend, the girl was a bit bummed out, she didn't let it show of course, but dealing with Makkari's absence was a lot more difficult than she thought it'd be.

The first day was fine, she managed to not think about it too much and busy herself with cleaning around her house and going to work. By the third day though, she was starting to feel the little tug at her heart that yearned for Makkari's presences and her little comments about how boring her life was and how she should spicy it up by adopting a cat or going on adventures with her. By day five, the tug had turned into an ache and y/n spent all night texting the brunette, asking her about her trip and how she's doing, all while managing to ease her aching heart.

By the end of that week, y/n was more than excited to have her girlfriend back in her arms. She met up with her in the airport and Makkari had to physically hold herself back from speeding from between all of the people to hug the girl tightly. Y/n wiped a few stray tears after their hug and had to bite her lips to ease the giant smile breaking across her face, then she frowned when Makkari signed something.

The only thing y/n struggles with in her friendship with Makkari is understanding her. Makkari is deaf and uses sign language as her main way of communication with everyone, y/n included. She feels horrible when she doesn't understand the girl that makes her heart speed up from first time, so Makkari turned into typing what she wants to say on her phone then showing it to her, it wasn't the best way to do it but it was officiant.

Y/n shook her head in disdain and Makkari smiled gently, then she typed what she said on her phone and showed it to her, I've missed you it says and y/n grinned so wide Makkari could tell that it made her cheeks ache. "I've missed you more."

Barely a day later and y/n is forcing Makkari to watch the sunset with her.

Well, y/n wasn't actually watching the sunset, she had her eyes trained on the women with tied up locs beside her. Spending an entire week separated from Makkari made her realize somethings. For example, her undeniable lo—liking to the eternal, along with her desire to actually be with her.

She mind drifts off to that one time when they talked about their past lovers, Makkari claimed she was never too interested in anyone but maybe a friend and things didn't work out with him, she did mention she didn't care much for who she likes as long as their bond was mutual and geniuen.

She wonders if whatever they have is mutual, then she remembers that one time Makkari spent the night and they didn't sleep at all, they spent about an hour just simply admiring each other with just whispered passed between them. People who are just friends don't do that, not to her knowledge.

Y/n opens her mouth to say something, then shuts it almost immediately. What would she even say? Hey 'Kari, while you've been gone I've been doing some thinking and I realized that I really like you. Would you like to go out with me? She probably wouldn't even understand her because she knows she'd be speaking too fast.

Makkari turns towards her though, having felt the vibrations of her slight movement, and cocks an eyebrows at her questioningly. The girl only smiles and shakes her head at her, not wanting to expose herself just yet. There's a plan already brewing somewhere in her brain already, but today is about spending time with Makkari, that's what she's going to do.

────────────────────────────

Makkari hadn't seen y/n in days, she was growing extremely worried. For herself or the girl she's grown attached to, she's not too sure.

She hadn't seen her since the day they hung out together, after watching the sunset they had dinner together, then went for a few hours' walk and had some ice cream before she walked her to her house. She did reach out to hang out again but y/n keeps rejecting her request and Makkari was growing to believe that maybe she's done something to push her away, to upset her or something.

Spending her time holed up in her apartment thinking about the possibilities of having no contact with the girl was driving her insane, so she sped across her apartment and grabbed her jacket before speeding across the town she's spending time in to get to her crush's house.

It was an impulsive decision and Makkari preferred continue with it before chickening out, where did this pulse of boldness came from she has no idea, but she will take advantage of it.

Though as seconds passed while she remained standing just outside y/n's house, she started getting second thoughts. Maybe this wasn't so smart, maybe she should just go back home until y/n reaches out for her, maybe—

The door opens and Makkari opens and closes her mouth trying to come up with excuses as to why she was here, but then the sight of y/n takes her breath away, like it had so many times, and she doesn't even remember why she was here in the first place.

She looked casual, with her hair tied up and her body drowned in sweatpants and a sweatshirt, saving her from the cold breeze that occasionally brushed through the air.

She seemed very surprised to see Makkari, she blinks a few times and closes he rparted lips, "'Kari, What're you doing here? Are you okay?"

For a moment, Makkari considers lying. Oh yeah, I was just in the neighborhood and wanted to come back to say hi since we haven't talked in a few days. She would buy it, and she would go along with it and look at her with those eyes that beg her to say something about anything that's been happening between them but Makkari doesn't say that, her hands intertwining in front of her and she's letting out a breath.

Maybe it's time for a confrontation?

She bites her lip then pulls out her phone, she's typing so fast y/n doesn't see her fingers moving anymore. She furrows her eyebrows and then gulps when Makkari shows her the screen, did I do something wrong? You've been ignoring me.

It wasn't a question, but a clear statement. She wasn't accusing her, she was pointing out her action. She couldn't lie her way out of this even if she wanted to and y/n looks back up at her with hesitancy. She nibbles at her bottom lip and whispers a soft "fuck it" under her breath.

Makkari furrows her brows in confusion when y/n starts making strange motions with her hands and her face clears out when she realizes it's a sloppy "I'm sorry" spelling out in letters.

There's a soft, very small smile tugging at the edges of her lips when y/n sighs in frustration when she realizes that she was probably unsuccessful with her first attempt at trying to sign. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. I've been— I've been trying to learn this, sign language, for you. So you don't have to type away at your phone and for me to understand you better, I'm sorry."

Makkari couldn't help the grin ripping through her face at her words, she almost reaches out and smashes her lips against the girl's but when she's doing it again, the motions with her hands, her attention is diverted to them instead.

It takes her a minute, maybe two, to understand exactly what she's trying to say. "I like you, a lot, and I was wondering if maybe you want to go out with me? Like on a date?"

Makkari is nodding as soon as she understands, she meets y/n's eyes and is nodding again. She makes a motion that says "yes" and y/n releases a relieved sigh followed by a grin.

They're both just standing there, on y/n's porch with wide smiles on their faces, staring at each other with this soft glint in their eyes that explained that they were more than just friends, and they weren't a tad bit ashamed of it.

[got-to-love-a-badboy]

Special guest

Previous chapter ^^^

Special guest

Chapter 10 - goodnight

Jack Grealish x female character

🔞 CAUTION! SMUT IN THIS CHAPTER 🔞

Will warn with a ⚠️ when smut is happening

"JACK!! there's a guy over there who's just taken a picture of us kissing!", Jacks eyes instantly shot over to the paparazzi behind the car, "shit!, El get in the car", she did as he asked and got in the range rover dreading what he would do next, Jack stomped up to the paparazzi, "MATE! What's your problem?!, why can't I enjoy a night out with friends, your the only one here, piss off!", the paparazzi didn't answer he just got into his own car and drove away, Jack would have to deal with this in the morning, as he walked back to the car he saw Ellie in the rear window, she looked so sad, had he caused her to feel this way, he was pissed of but he needed to fix how she was feeling.

He climbed back into the Range Rover and sat next to Ellie, "babe, come here, why are you sad?", he pulled her into a hug, "nothing, I just.. we've had such an amazing night and now that one guy has ruined it, the press are going to be all over you, il get abuse online, and what ever this is will end, It sounds selfish but.... I just wanted more time with you", Jack felt a mix of emotions, he felt the sadness that Ellie felt because yeah the guy had put a downer ob their night but he could save it, and he also felt extremely lucky because despite all this happening Ellie was worried about how things would be for Jack after, he always knew she was genuine but this confirmed it, anyone that was after him for the money or fame would be like 'it's out in the open now let's just go public! Il move in with you!' But not Ellie.

"Listen to me El, yeah it's changed our night but we were heading home anyway, we can make it what we want to, and as for the picture, yeah it's shit but we can deal with it tomorrow, we don't know what picture he got, it could have been the kiss or just us walking out, only time will tell", Ellie smiled at Jack, "wow, you surprise me Grealish, I totally expected you to loose your cool with all this", Jack laughed as he placed his hand on Ellie's thigh, "mr cool calm collected me babe, come on let's get back, we can watch a movie in bed eh?", Ellie leaned in and kissed his cheek and leaned her head on his shoulder, "sounds like a plan".

Once they arrived back at the house Ellie instantly bent over in the hallway and took her shoes off, Jack stopped behind her in amazement, he could only fight this feeling for so long, she wasn't even trying to seduce him she was simply taking off her shoes and it turned Jack into a horny mess.

Once her shoes were off she stood up as Jack walked behind her and placed a small kiss on her neck, "you want to watch a movie in my room?", Ellie could feel the tightening in her stomach, but she had to reply, she let out a shaky, "um ... yeah can do", Jack held onto her hand and walked up the stairs, as he reached his room Ellie announced, "I'm just going to change il be 2 minutes", Jack reluctantly let go of her hand and before he knew it she had vanished into her room, he thought he had ruined it and the moment was gone, so he went into his room got undressed and got into bed in his boxers.

Ellie closed to door and slumped to the floor as she pulled her phone out, 'please be awake!!', she thought as she text Jess.

Ellie - please tell me you are awake!

Jess - yeah babe what's wrong?

Ellie - oh god Jess!, we've had an amazing night and on the way out of the bar a paparazzi caught us kissing, I totally thought everything was over but we've come home and Jack had asked me to watch a movie in his room! What do I do, iv snuck off to change but do I go back!?

Jess - what the hell!, well do you want to? It's up to you, don't do it because he wants to, what to you want? Because you know a movie isn't a movie right?

Ellie - yeah I figured, I feel like I want to, I really do Jess, I'm so horny for him, but I don't want to seem desperate,

Jess - ok El!! TMI!

Then it's upto you babe, your an adult you can decide what you want to do, but you took your pill right?

Ellie - haha yeah mum! I took my pill. Ok il ring you in the morning! Love u!

Jess - love you more geek!

——————————————

Ellie decide on these pyjamas before heading back into Jacks room.

She knocked on the door softly, she heard Jack get out of bed and stumble, it sounded like he fell over and dropped his phone or something which made her chuckle.

"Ellie! Hi, I thought you decided against coming in here" Jack said as he scratched the back of his neck, "no I went to change", Ellie said as she spun around to show off her pyjamas, "yeah, I see, very cute. Come on in" Jack moved aside as Ellie walked into his room, "what was the bang when I knocked?", Ellie asked out of curiosity, "oh erm... I kind of jumped out of bed, banged my foot on the leg and dropped my phone", the two let out a small chuckle, "let me see your foot Jack", Ellie told him as she sat on his bed, Jack went around to his side and lifted his foot onto the bed, "it doesn't hurt that much" he told her acting tough, "yeah well it's bruising already, come on lay back, il sort the movie", Ellie told him, making him sit right back on the bed with his back resting on the headboard.

⚠️⚠️⚠️ warning ⚠️ ⚠️⚠️

Ellie had put the movie on and the two were laid on the bed watching fast and furious, her head was on Jacks stomach as she laid sideways on the bed so her bum was near the pillows, Jacks hand started rubbing Ellie back before making its way down to her hips and before long it found it's place on her bum cheek, "I'm so glad you came here tonight El", Jack told her, she turned her head to look at him, "me too, even after the photo and panicking about your friends iv had the perfect night", Jack smiled at her, "come here", he told her, she sat up and moved so she was sat next to Jack, he also sat up and put a hand on Ellie's cheek, "I can't keep pretending these feelings aren't here, you haven't noticed but iv been staring at your bum for the last hour" Jack laughed at what he just said, "you know what, neither can I, I get the caution and keeping quiet so I am fully happy for you want to do that but..." Ellie climbed on top of Jacks lap, "we're in the house and no one can see us, so why be cautious now", Jacks hands snaked around her hips and landed on her bum, he gently squeezed so he had both hands full, "god your irresistible Ellie", he leaned closer and connected their lips, Ellie's hands began combing through Jacks bed head as his stayed firmly on her bum.

After a few minutes of kissing, Ellie moved her hands from Jacks hair and took of her pyjama top, Jacks eyes opened in amazement, "Holy shit El", he moved one hand from her bum and caressed her breast, "your so fucking beautiful princess", Ellie connected their lips again this time with more passion, before pulling back and letting out a small moan from Jacks attention to her breast, "I need you Jack".

He couldn't take it no more, he flipped Ellie over and placed himself between her legs, "oh you will baby, but first there's something I need to do", Ellie watched as Jack slowly began kissing down her stomach and onto her thighs, "'mmm... Jack", she let out multiple moans, the thought of what was coming was driving her insane.

Jacked pulled down her pyjama shorts to reveal a set of white knickers that matched her bra, "how have you kept this hidden", Jack instantly moved her knickers to the side and connected his mouth with her clit, "oh my god! Jack!", Ellie screamed, this was the most pleasure she had ever experienced, she wasn't a virgin but Jack just hit differently.

Jack kept up the pace for 5 minutes, When he felt Ellie's legs shaking he knew she was close, he didn't want that to be the case for their first time so he disconnected his mouth in anticipation of finishing them both, Ellie had other plans, as soon as Jack moved, she pinned him to the bed, "my turn now Grealish" Ellie told him seductively as she sat on the floor and made him move to the edge, Jack brushed the hair from her face and looked into her eyes, "you don't have to do this El", Ellie sat up on her knees, "oh I do Jack, I want you", she told him, this drove Jack crazy.

Ellie kissed him on his lips as she tugged on his boxers, Jack wriggled out of them as Ellie places a hand on his stomach, "relax Grealish", Jack laid down on the bed as Ellie took his penis in her hands, she rubbed her hand up and down the length earning a groan from Jack, "fuck! Ellie... god", when she felt Jack was ready she placed his penis in her mouth, going slowly at first before gaining speed, she pushed her head further down so his penis was at the back of her throat, causing her to gag, she felt jack sit up on the bed so he could see her, she looked at him through her lashes, the sight of Jack coming apart could have made her crumble there and then, but she wanted to make this as sexy and memorable as she could, she pulled back and teased him with her tongue before Jack put his hand on her chin and lifted her up, "babe that was fuking amazing but I need you ... now"

Ellie laid on the bed next to Jack, within seconds he was between her legs, "are you 100% sure you want to do this" Jack checked with Ellie before he did anything, "Jack yes, just fuck me ... please!", he gave her a cheeky grin before guiding himself into her vagina, he placed one hand in her hip and the other on the pillow behind her head, he leaned closer to her placing kisses to her neck as he slowly thrust into her, he could feel her walls tighten around him, she was close, and so was he.

Jack sped up the pace and before long Ellie was screaming with pleasure, "oh god Jack!, I'm so close, keep going baby", he did as she asked and a few seconds later they both came at the same time.

Jack gave Ellie a gentle kiss and put his forehead against hers, " I did not expect the night to end like this but fuck Im glad it did!", he flopped on to his back next to Ellie, she rolled over and laid her head in his chest, "yeah it was amazing" she gave a little chuckle.

“Goodnight Jack” she whispered, “goodnight Ellie”, Jack replied sleepily.

Before long the pair fell asleep in each others arms.

[vivalavi-daa]

Fav 2020 K-Dramas

1. Hospital Playlist

If there's anything I felt happy about in 2020, it's the fact that I've found my next ultimate fav kdramas. More than another, this kdrama feels like a home I could return to every time. Yes, hospital playlist is a slice of life drama that portrays the lives of people in hospital, but there's something about it that is so captivating to watch. I love how it realistically portrays the adults' daily lives & has no major villain of the story that heats things up whatsoever. Instead, I find it easy to emphatize with every character here, even with a patient who appears less than 5 minutes because this kdrama taught us that every life is worth it. And the friendship of the professors... it really has the power to bring joy & warmth to me.

(I also made a post about hospital playlist's characters study on my side blog. Here, if you’re interested).

2. Flower of Evil

Stories that revolve around someone who isn't capable of having emotions aren't nothing new in kdrama land. But this one, especially, is a gem. This one kept me on the edge of my seat because of how nerve wracking some of the scenes are. The suspenseful dramas, the mysteries, the romance...they're all so engaging to watch. I wasn't sure what to expect from the lead character and therefore it's exciting to see what was going to happen & to see how the characters would develop. And to be noted, I swear the cast who played the villain here gives off really scary vibes. He deserves an award for that alone

3. Mr. Queen

I'm not usually a big fan of Saeguk drama and yet here I am putting one on my fav kdrama list. I watched it merely to ease my boredom but then I surprised myself of how much I enjoyed this kdrama. The opening video was appealing & I love how entertaining Mr. Queen was. It became my weekly dose of serotonin (though it gets angsty at times). I thought the story's gonna be weird since it's about a man trapped in a woman's body in joseon era but heck, it was worth it; hilarious, and delicious (yeah, the cooking part) to watch. I've always known Shin Hye Sun is great at acting, but she truly nailed it in this one I swear.

4. 365: Repeat the Year

This drama is gold! It has a promising premise, and the rest of the story went better than I expected. It just never let me down. I thought it's merely about a time travel story, but turns out it's more than that. I never knew what to expect & every time I thought I figured something out, they always have a way to throw a surprise every week. This drama deserves more recognition imo.

5. When the Weather is Fine

This drama is a pleasant to eyes and heart. Watching it is like having a warm tea during winter days. I wasn't truly engaged with the first eps, but I slowly began to see how beautiful & heartwarming this drama is. Yes, the story pace is a bit slow, but I realized that it's important to make us understand each character deeply, what they suffer from, and how the characters slowly develop. It shows us that the journey toward emotional healing may take time, but it's worth it. Choosing to heal itself is a big step & deserves an appreciation. Another thing I highly praise from this drama is how it implicitly reminds us that if we do suffer emotionally, don't be afraid to ask for help, or to let someone help you.

6. Tale of the Nine Tailed

From the first moment I knew who would cast in this drama and what the drama is about, it's obvious that I'd love it. And I was right. The first eps had already got me hooked. The stories were amazing & funny at times. It has unique lovable characters that complete the drama. In addition, I love the mystical fantasy vibes and how they wrapped up urban legends in modern settings. Not to mention how adorable Kim Bum's character here. He & Lee Dong Wook's bromance is to die for.

7. Do You Like Brahms?

I watched it by chance, and then I fell in love the instant I watched the first eps. The drama is just beautifully done. It has soothing music & ambience and mainly revolves around good people. It's appealing how they portrayed the different perspectives between the lead couple--one who doesn't have talent but works hard to achieve her dream, and one who has talent but wishes he didn't have it. Though the lead couple has different dreams, I can't help but rooting for them... as I've never seen a relationship so awkward yet so real and so adorable before them.

8. Record of Youth

Honestly, it took a bit long for me to be completely enamored of the stories and feel what the characters feel. But as the stories developed, I began to cherish what this drama tried to show us: of how important it is to have good communication & to support each other in our family, of how everyone has different timings in life, and that everyone could have second chance in life. It's also refreshing to see the main couple here & how they interact; we could learn a lot from their communication & relationship. Overall, record of youth is one light & comforting kdrama that's perfect to watch while we need a short escape or need something to cheer us up.

9. Start Up

Honestly, I have a conflicted feelings towards this kdrama. It started off as great but...I have a hard time making sense of some of the stories afterward. And not to mention how we used to ship-debating every week it was a bit draining 😅. But to exclude it from my last year fav kdrama list seems wrong anyhow because I did love this drama. Idk, it gives off this positive energy that I needed to go through a crazy year. It somehow encouraged me to move forward & fight for my dream no matter what. The story's also quiet creative and relatable in nowadays world, while also educating us about the world of business.

10. Find Me in Your Memory

I started watching without any expectations and turns out it's really good. It's not hard to love this drama since it has likeable characters with interesting background (a guy who can't forget everything & a woman who forgets some of her important moments). The lead couple's interactions were interesting to watch. They have the kind of romance that grows slowly & when it finally reachs its peak, it burns. I loved every minute of it.

K-drama recommendations: 5/?

[serenityseventeen]

Love & Letter: To The Thirteen Boys I've Loved Before

The Eighth Letter

----------------

To: Xu Minghao

From: Y/N

Dear Minghao,

I just want to thank you for being my friend despite my awkward confession, even if this current friendship might not last long. Actually, I don't think it will.

I'll be honest here since I didn't tell you this yet.

I spent a few years away from love. My high school years had so many different love stories and none of them exactly had a happy ending. They were all bittersweet endings and even the love story with you is a bit bittersweet.

I guess I misinterpreted your actions. I'm not mad or extremely sad that you rejected me, I feel like that put me in my place. Now that I think about it, maybe we weren't meant to be lovers. So, I don't want to drift away from you just because you rejected my confession. I'm not going to love you like that anymore, I want to keep you as a true friend.

I hope you won't feel awkward around me. I can already feel the awkward air but I wish for it to fade quickly. Let's not stop being friends. I'll stop loving you though. I hope you won't think of me differently now that I've confessed. I feel like you would pretend that it's fine but inside, the awkwardness only grows.

As I'm writing this letter, the fate of us is still being determined. Even I don't know what we are going to become. If the ending for us is unhappy and we decide to stop being friends... Well, I would blame myself for it. I would be losing a friend that I adored.

MinghaoI won't ever talk about my confession again so I'm writing this.

, you're a really attractive guy. I'm sure that anyone would fall for you if they got to know you. You're fashionable, fun, kind, warm-hearted, and also a great therapist, haha. You give me the best advice and always listen to my problems whenever I need to let them out. You always encourage me to speak up.

Remember that one time when I was getting yelled at by the professor over a misunderstanding? I was just standing there like a complete idiot, listening to the professor's words of criticism when you stood up and said, “Professor, it wasn't Y/N's fault. If you looked closely, you would have seen that the dress already had holes in it from the beginning. It was a part of the design. As a fashion professor, how could you overlook that?”

Your expression was so serious and you completely cornered the professor. I feel kind of bad talking about the professor like this but I just want to praise you. The professor apologized after class but I knew he was unwilling to admit his mistake.

When you stood up for me for the first time, you left such an admirable first impression. I wanted to get to know you immediately! You were so cool speaking straightforwardly like that and not hesitantly speaking your mind and standing up for me. I still admire you.

Minghao, honestly, I don't think we'll be okay.

The words still kind of hurt me. Whenever I see you, I think back on those words you said to me.

Since I was just a friend that confessed, I don't think you would remember your response to my confession, so let me remind you; not in a bad way. Since this is a keepsake letter, I just want to remind myself.

I think you and I were in front of an art museum together. You invited me along that bright, sunny morning, and of course, after realizing my feelings, I couldn't deny your offer. I was excited.

I'm sure you'll never know my side of the story so I'll tell you everything that happened that day and why it leaves a small scar in my chest. I'm not blaming you for it, I'm blaming myself. Minghao, it's all my fault.

Honestly, I was too expectant. Gosh... I was way too ahead of myself that day. Our friendly hangout in my head was a date.

After you invited me and told me that you'd come to pick me up in 30 minutes, I rolled out of my college dormitory bed and rushed everything. I did my hair, makeup, and tried to dress prettily for you.

I did my best in that short amount of time but the only thing you complimented was my outfit. Sure, I was happy, but also disappointed. I was bummed because I didn't even have a chance to breathe, meanwhile, you were looking as fashionable as ever with almost no effort.

The museum was fun. I always had a knack for art so everything was admirable and lovely. What made it better was that I was able to spend that time with you. We shared our thoughts with each other but to me, you looked way too serious. I should have gotten the hint then that you didn't feel the same way about me as I did toward you.

Suddenly, this lump started forming on my chest and I just felt like I should get it off. I didn't want to hold back anymore so after walking around the art museum, the words just slipped out of my mouth.

Then you went silent while staring at me.

“I'm sorry.”

I said it was fine then because I thought I was really fine with the rejection. But just a bit after, I realized that I couldn't ride in the same car as you. I wouldn't be able to. Everything came flooding back into my brain, the memories of us that I thought were memorable. That's why I told you to leave first. I'm sure you knew that we both were uncomfortable.

After you left, I just sort of... reminisced our sweet moments that seemed romantic enough to make us more than friends. I did that while taking a walk.

I especially remembered the days when we went shopping, worked together after courses and talked about our days. Even these things that seem so small held so many memorable things to me, including moments that made my heart pound and race.

Since you rejected me, friend-zoning me, I can only conclude that you don't like me back, thus the conclusion that these moments meant nothing more than acts of kindness.

Minghao, you shouldn't be so kind, or else people would misunderstand you, like me. Why must you be so attractive? You're masculine but at the same time, you can become so soft and cute and caring.

Anyway, at this point, you've probably lost interest in reading this letter (if you ever read it). I hope you'll trudge on though as I keep going forward with the reminiscing. I know that you like reading, Minghao.

So, when we went to the bookstore, there was something memorable that happened to me there.

Yes, it made my heart pound too.

Yes, it made me fall harder for you.

I was really sleepy that day. All the college work piling up only made me more stressed and I was so tired. You didn't know that I was, did you?

I ended up falling asleep at a table while you were choosing books.

When I woke up, I saw your face. It wasn't upside down, you were sitting next to me, with your head lying against the table, facing me. It's still a question to me why you did that when you could have just woken me up or sat somewhere else, but well, you rejected me.

You and I just stared at each other. I was wondering then, what were you thinking?

At that time, I didn't know how you felt about me, so every little thing was hope. Your face was so close to mine and our bodies were against each other slightly. I was able to feel your warm breath.

“Are you wide awake now?” You asked.

Minghao, when you asked that, I honestly got the feeling that you were nervous because you quickly got up and removed the book you have placed under my head while I was sleeping.

You? Nervous? I guess I was wrong.

Even now, I feel a bit hopeful that maybe sometimes, I did make your heart race, but that's all just false hope.

We went clothes shopping around a month ago.

You wanted to get some new hats and I tagged along because we were friends. While picking hats, we were talking about normal stuff that we always talk about, so I was busy with that conversation. I was talking to you while looking at hats and then suddenly, I felt a hat plop down on my head.

When I turned around, I nearly bumped into your chest. Your hand was still on my head, where the hat was placed. I was so nervous and my whole body was burning up, you know that?

After that, you had to attack again with your soft giggles and smile, making me completely melt.

Then, you took off the hat and patted my head and ruffed my hair, then continued the conversation as if you didn't just do that to me. Of course, you probably never knew how I felt.

This is the last one, I promise.

I picked this one carefully.

That day after courses. It was a rainy afternoon and we were together at the library, studying and working together.

It was getting dark but we didn't expect the rain so we didn't take umbrellas with us. We ended up staying at the library for hours, just talking.

That was the important, special part of this memory.

We talked a lot and I was happy. You made a lot of jokes and I learned a lot more about you. You also smiled a lot. I was just really happy to be around you, talking about your life and mine.

I don't know why this one is the most memorable for me. I just always, constantly, remember the scene of us sitting at a table in the library, talking to each other beside a window painted with raindrops.

I don't know if you felt it but to me, it seemed more like we were flirting.

Minghao, now that I've reached the near end of this letter, I think I've decided the future for us.

Let's not stay friends. I don't want to fall for you. I don't want to love you. Being your friend would only make it worse for both of us since you didn't feel the same way.

You asking me to your b-boy competitions, you asking me to look at your art projects, it was all just normal things that friends would do but I overreacted.

It's all my fault and I'm sorry for it. I'm sorry and I know that I can't fix our friendship. I was such a fool.

Minghao, I hope you can find a better friend than me; A friend that doesn't misunderstand you, a friend that can love you without falling for you romantically, a friend that can be better than me.

My love stories always have a bittersweet ending so don't worry, you're not the only guy.

Thank you for being my friend for a year. I really appreciate it. You were a great buddy, fun, kind, serious, and caring.

I'm sorry for being this way.

I'm sorry for what I did, though I can't take back my confession.

I shouldn't have fallen in love, right?

Sincerely,

Y/N

-----------------

© serenityseventeen

7/1/21 - 10:28 pm

a/n: Get well! Wishing our best leader a healthy recovery!!! + it's the month of July, which means... Wonwoo's bday (and my sister's). + Ending fairy Boo = iconic ><

[i-need-air]

Truthful mess.

Summary: Truth quirk shenanigans. HCs type with Bakugou, Kirishima, Shouto and Shinsou.

Note: Still don't know how to add "Read more" on phone, still need to make a masterlist. At least I have coffee. [I’M DOING BOTH RN, BE PROUD;;;LOOKATTHEReADMORE] Ty for reading! ♥

Bakugou Katsuki:

× well, shit

× he fucked up real bad and now he had to pay for it

× noticed something was wrong when he thanked Kirishima for saving his life instead of giving him the usual snappy attitude

× made the redhead promise to keep the secret or he'll kill him

× seriously kill and incinerate his body and was 100% serious about it

× Bakugou tried his hardest to keep his mouth shut and everything went okay until you just existed in the same room at him

× he'd just get the fuck out because all he wanted to tell you was how good you looked in whatever you were wearing or how beautiful your face was when kissed by the rays of sunshine and he was so confused

× he literally wanted to word vomit all of that

× thankfully the police arresting the mf that did this to him informed Katsuki about the effects of the quirk itself

× approximately 3 days of spilling truths

× he could handle that

× easy

× but not really; the less he talked the more he needed to spill out his mind

× he'd still snap at people, they were just dumb and he voiced that but

× well, hello there, [y/n]

× he prays you don't waltz around him

× life can be a bitch though

× it happened while training, Cementos made an area for each of you to improve your quirks and guess what? you're placed just by his side

× you just waved at him and he ignored you

× asshole much; until you kick-dropped and broke a big piece of cement in half

× "Fuck, that was so sexy..."

× your head turned slowly towards Bakugou because that was his voice, definitely, no doubt

× but it was raspy and low and it did some things to your, ehem, lowers and holy shit

× Bakugou looked like a deer caught in the highlights; he was full "step on me" mode and????????

× instantly turned the other way and yes, he is blushing

× he just couldn't hold it in, man

× so you're confused, blushing, Kirishima is near-by shook as fuck because he's ✨ realizing things ✨ since of course he's now Bakugou's self-proclaimed guard dog

× and Bakugou is back at ignoring you, his friend and the world

× you decide to keep an eye on him because that was not normal and oh my god why is that voice still affecting you? did he seriously say that??

× meanwhile you catch him looking at you from the corner of your eyes

× boy is staring real bad

× so you just go his way

× he panics as you approach him and blows shit up

× "Don't fucking come closer!" you freeze because what the hell? you thought you were getting along? yeah he's been snappy recently but it's Bakugou, he has mood-swings

× but not like this? at least with you?

× also what he said before just gave you hope??

× so you decide Fuck it all and get closer, noticing how Kirishima also approaches, looking like a bodyguard

× you raise your eyebrow because Excuse you?

× "[L/N], you should leave him be for now–"

× "Get out of my way or I'll break you, Kirishima."

× so you're having a staring match with the red-head, almost nose to nose when legit a growl shakes you to the core

× "[Y/N]'s mine, Shitty Hair, back down." he said between his teeth, his palms sparkling, quirk ready

× so his friend backs up, hands raised in defeat but a knowing grin on his face

× even in full shock you expected him to ignore you again but he just stomps towards you angrily, teeth greeted

× "You have a thing for him, hmm? You like Kirishima?" he was glaring at you, breathing heavily but suddenly locked his eyes in your lips

× and while he's throwing this fit or whatever it was, all the class kinda stopped whatever they were doing to see what's going on

× but Cementos ain't having any of that so parts you guys with a cement wall and orders you to keep training

× Bakugou was never more thankful because holy shit what was about to happen?

× you're full mind-blown, remembering his words again and again not even focusing on training; you decide to talk with his dumb ass to clarify what he said and wAs he jealous? i mean he literally said you're his so—... HE FUCKING SAID YOU'RE HIS????

× after that he went back to his grumpy old man form, you don't talk again until days later, although you did try to approach him again, many times, because YOU'RE HIS????????

× it's when he finally realizes the quirk is wearing off and he's relieved because it got to a point where he couldn't sleep

× so when you confront him in the common room the next morning he shrugs it off with a "I thought I'd accidentally confess that I love you and that would've been a problem."

× he freezes

× you freeze

× he wanted to call you a dumbass and move on until he figures his shit up but...

× that's when he realizes the effect of the quirk was dying off in waves

× save him from the mortification and confess too, please?

Kirishima Eijirou:

× he's normally a truthful guy

× but not like this, man, not like this

× Fatgum saved his ass but it was too late since he already got hit by a quirk, although none knew what it was about, so his mentor was having a full Panic moment

× later on he was informed about it's nature and was confused because nothing changed?

× he still compliments people, he's still his old self and is actually so happy that's the case

× thinks he's manly because he's honest about his feelings

× although he forgot about a tiny little detail

× his big fat crush on you

× like he'd blush when you came around, almost stuttered when responding to you, would try harder when you were around because pretty please, notice him, shows off more, all the I-need-YOUR-attention bag

× because he's smooth but in a Kirishima way, you know?

× felt he had zero (0) game [so not manly of him]

× will hands down not avoid you; thinks it's lame to run away from this

× who would've thought this was the best thing that could've happened to him?

× still had his boyish charm, cute smiles, blushes

× but now we add the honest "You look amazing today. Well, more than usual." with a wink because if he can't stop himself, at least he'll make it work big time

× and oh, shit that's doing stuff to your poor heart because his compliments are all over the roof? wth is going on?

× everyone knew about his feelings for you but now they really knew

× literally takes him half a day to spill all out

× he did try to clear his mind of those feelings in class because that would be so awkward and weird; he spent so much time daydreaming how to confess before and doing it there was definitely not the plan, but something more personal and meaningful

× when Kiri saw you in the common room though, alone and minding your own business, a grin broke on his face and had hearts in his eyes

× Bakugou had to hear a lot of shit about you, tho just rolled his eyes; "whatever, shitty hair."

× because you're so flawlessly beautiful and you're not even trying

× your head snaps up at him, blushing

× OOP–did he just blurt that out?

× so he's laughing awkwardly because not like this, man

× but goes with it because We die like men here 😤

× cue word vomit about how great you are and this quirk hit him and god you're amazing and it's not a lie because remember when you first met at UA? well he thought you were an angel and when you smiled at him? perfection and your blushing face is adorable and needs to see it everyday and ok this quirk needs to stop–

× meanwhile

× [Y/N].exe has stopped working

× legit tho, he won't shut the hell up and it's adorable

× all day he's been super smooth about his compliments to you and now he's the sweetest mess ever

× and you only notice yourself smiling when he points it out and says it's the single most beautiful thing he's ever seen in his entire life

× and even if that almost makes you 404 again you laugh and walk towards him

× which he follows and steps closer to you too

× smiling

× so he calms down when you're not freaking out about what he's spilling and goes back to being cha-cha-real-smooth again

× "I want to be able to call you mine"

Todoroki Shouto:

× another guy that doesn't really notice it at first

× he got hit by this weird blue-purple dust while on patrol with his dad

× and Endeavor went feral on this low-life villain deciding to attack suddenly

× low and behold, seems the guy wasn't a villain, just a civilian that sneezed and activated his quirk by accident

× quirk that landed on Shouto here

× which just stared confused because what?

× explanations happen, Endeavor is looking down at Shouto expecting something anytime now

× but Icy-Hot here just shrugs it off because it's okay, it's just 3 or 4 days

× funny thing is his dad asked him questions and realized pretty quick that Shouto has been really honest with him until now, which bummed him because Endeavor Is Trying™

× Todoroki Shouto was confident that nothing would go wrong so he forgets about it basically

× two days pass; class time happens

× is so fucking casual about it but it's so hilariously confusing

× he was honest before but he was quiet in general, that's why his honesty came in small dosages

× now he has no filter and won't shut up, he has this absolute need to share his thoughts

× my boy has opinions about everything

× but especially about [Y/N]

× oh yeah, he definitely tells you how that color enhances your natural beauty or how you're really smart

× is so casual and nonchalant, shooks everyone, leaves you full confusion mode while he just smiles and leaves

× legit doesn't realize it

× he complimented you before, that's the thing, but now he's really intensifying it but without changing the tone and execution and it's just a mess

× example:

× goes from "You changed your hairstyle. It looks nice." to "The way you style your hair now makes your eyes pop out more. I love it."

× lowkey proclaims his love about you; it's so obvious it hurts; you have to take it like a champ, man

× it takes Tsu to actually ask what's going on, in the first hour of class

× [even Aizawa is listening, pretending to sleep]

× explains why he's acting like this; "I got hit accidentally by a quirk that makes me speak only the truth."

× everyone just goes crazy while you're piecing stuff together in deep thought

× "Who do you think is the strongest in the class?"

× "Aizawa."

× lowkey a little shit

× "Between the students."

× "Me."

× big time a little shit

× it's until Mina asks who he likes that all hell breaks loose

× Shouto just turns to look at you, blinks and says your name

× just as everyone goes mental after a moment of silence, the bell rings signaling the next class, to which Aizawa [the mature man he is, acting as if this wasn't the best tea-spill he's gonna have at lunch with the other teachers 💅] wakes up, silences everyone and continues class

× every pair of eyes are on you all class

× Shouto is having an existencial crisis because he's actually realizing himself that he likes you

× a lot

× hands down he thought about how great you are, wondered deep in though at night why his heart beat so fast when you smiled at him, how come he got jealous???? when you'd pair with someone else to study or train... the boy didn't even know it was jealousy until now

× as in now he knew he wanted to hold your hand, have more inside jokes between you two, kiss you, marry you, wait what—

× you on the other hand are hyperventilating because Shouto likes you

× and you like him back and oH my god, wHAT just happened????

× lunch break comes, nobody moved from their seats while Todoroki just walks by, stares at you, slight blush on his face

× "I'd like to speak alone with you. About my feelings. Towards you. I like you."

× nice alone chat, Shouto 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏

× legit nobody is breathing, not making a single noise, waiting for your reaction

× so through stutters and all, you have to grab him by his wrist and get the hell out, the attention being too much

× before you reach a quiet place to talk he just stares at your hand

× "I like it when you touch me. Your hand is warm and it makes my skin tingle–"

× so you're a blushing mess when you let go of his wrist fastly

× "Do you not like me back?" [insert kicked puppy face]

× [insert you telling him that you do, but all the attention in class was killing you]

× "Good. Now hold my hand properly."

× that day Shouto learned that being bold with you was the perfect way to get the sweetest reactions out of you

× it's called teasing and Todoroki Shouto will never stop

Hitoshi Shinsou:

× Shinsou had a Reputation™, ok?

× Calm, cool, collected, that's Hitoshi Shinsou

× so how come Monoma did him so dirty?

× it seems the blond borrowed a quirk from someone he knew and fled to school to just bring Hell on Earth

× but the only person he managed to throw the quirk at was at Shinsou

× it wasn't even intended for him, but for Bakugou to embarrass him

× so here he was, Mister Tired-of-this-fucking-world now having another reason to be done with everything

× the boy wasn't dumb

× made a strategy just as Monoma was apologizing for the mistake

× somehow the blond took a liking on him and even if he was now part of class 2-A, Monoma proclaimed he was a 2-B at heart; moving on...

× 3 to 5 days of not talking lies

× great, amazing, marvelous, incredible, fantastic

× Rule #1: Avoid [Y/N] at all costs

× which would prove rather difficult since you're part of the same group he was in

× and you were starting to be really good friends

× something he loved/hated because yes, he wants your friendship but he also wants much more

× so when you came to class, would you look at that! Shinsou is sleeping!

× when you went to lunch with the squad? he fled the scene, not opening his mouth

× asked to borrow a pen in class? didn't even look into your eyes as he just gave you one

× after 3 days of this you were starting to get annoyed

× and Midoriya was writing shit down in that notebook of his mumbling stuff every single time Hitoshi bailed

× what you didn't know is that the whole Dekusquad caught on to Shinsou's shenanigans and demanded answers

× well, Ochaco did and she instantly got them because she's terrifying when serious

× so Izuku is in deep fascination with the quirk, Iida is stiff as fuck and Uraraka has this really creepy I-know-something-you-don't smile on her face; Shouto was existing there too, minding his business 🍵

× you really tried to grab a hold of Shinsou but he wasn't even answering your texts

× time to make a game-plan

× and the easiest way to understand what's going on was through Deku and that suspicious notebook of his

× it wasn't even that hard to get it because you got the perfect opportunity basically thrown in your lap

× he was mumbling your name as he was writing down

× you literally demanded to see what he's writing about involving you

× the boy went full panic but before he could manage to escape the situation, the guy that's been avoiding you grabs you by your forearm and tugs you in the hallway

× there he was, purple messy head you wanted to smack, looking all uncomfortable, rubbing the back of his neck

× "Ok, listen, I have something to tell you and I want you to know through me, not through that notebook" he sighed, eyes avoiding you

× and while you're hurt and exhausted he just mumbles "Who knows what type of embarrassing stuff he wrote there..."

× hold up, he blushing?

× so while you're processing that he explains

× "Been hit by a quirk..." yada-yada, this and that

× "Ok, but why have you been avoiding me of all people?" you just go hard on him for a little bit, not hiding that you're hurting "Do you not trust me?"

× he's caught off guard

× "Because I love you and I'm scared you'll never look at me the same."

× longest silence of his life

× he never felt the need to fill a silent moment more than now

× so he mumbles

× oh, yah, he just blurts it all out while looking everywhere but you

× "I mean you deserve better than a guy with a quirk like this. I didn't want to make things uncomfortable between us so I thought avoiding you was the best, just so we can continue being friends and–"

× he's a fucking mess and it hurts you that he's saying stuff like that because holy shit you love this sleepy idiot?

× of course you kiss him to silence his rant

× and when you separate from it and start to reassure him he's just a m a z i n g, how dare he say stuff like that and how dare he avoid you for so long; now it's his time to kiss you back slowly and sweetly

× cue instant, lazy smile

× "You're adorable..."