#now it’s everyone vs phantom and he’s still winning

[chaoswarfare]

dp x dc prompt #24(finally, an age i am not yet)

Danny starts a prank war with young justice.

They’re fast friends, and this normally wouldn’t be a problem for any of the younger heroes to mess with each other, but Phantom is… a bit extreme with the pranks.

It started simple, like moving furniture two inches to the left, even phasing it partially into the wall.

Now there’s a dozen rabid reanimated hotdogs running loose, robin’s cape is possessed, and miss martian can only speak the espiranto version of pig latin… nobody is sure how it got to this point.

[katanashipping]

@love-killed-the-superstar​ I hope you don’t mind but this particular part of your recent liveblog just... really sparked something in my brain that I need to get out, re: Fast Forward, and it’s this repeating theme of FF rehashing a plot point from S1-4 but worse. Like the turtles version of a live action Disney reboot.

This turned into a massive rant, oops, more under the cut. Clearly, I have a lot of feelings about this.

Example: Shredder vs. Sh’okonabo

Consider the Shredder. He is an evil alien. He comes back time and again for four seasons before being defeated for good by the turtles’ allies. Every thing we learn about him is more messed up than the last, and learnt often at great personal cost. Notable henchmen: Karai (right hand woman & very skilled fighter), Hun (leads a notorious gang & very skilled fighter), Stockman (kind of a hostage situation, super smart guy who gets punished via mutilation) and later on, Chaplin (Stockman light)

Now consider Sh’okonabo. He is an evil alien. He pops up a few times over one season before being defeated for good by the turtles. We learn most things about him from an expositional voiceover from other characters, and he doesn’t evolve much beyond that. Not that good a fighter by himself. Notable henchmen: Darius Dunn (debatable, he has his own stuff going on), Zixx (debatable, he has his own stuff going on), and Viral (hostage situation, smart person who gets punished via mutilation). Every aspect of him mirrors the Shredder, if the Shredder had decided to try world domination by just... stumbling into the food hall of the UN one morning and feeding everyone poisoned porridge. And also had no friends subjects working for him.

Example: Things Change vs. Future Shellshock

Plotline: The turtles and Splinter have a normal day at home when something unexpectedly rips them out of their routine and throws them into the unfamiliar streets of New York City to fend for themselves. Making their way across the city, one of them gets trapped in an armored car and separated from the rest, turning the episode into a mixture of finding-their-feet and rescue-mission. At the end of the episode, the family finds a new home.

Things Change is the first episode of TMNT 2k3. It sets up the characters in their most archetypal ways, but also shows their connection as a family. The episode begins with the turtles training their ninjutsu skills when they are attacked by the mousers. Raph gets trapped in a Purple Dragon van in an attempt to evade danger, and the family follow in pursuit. Throughout the episode, the brothers might fight, but they never abandon one another. We meet  a few of the villains for the first time (Baxter Stockman, the Purple Dragons, and the Foot). At the end of the episode, the family reunites and find the Outpost Lair, thus finding a new home. Change, Splinter reminds us, is Good.

Future Shellshock is the first episode of the Fast Forward “reboot” and as such reintroduces the characters a little. The episode begins with the family fighting over the TV remote, a battle which Splinter wins (and which somehow comes up again in several other episodes of Fast Forward) when they are zapped to the year 2105. Mikey gets trapped in a newspaper van in an attempt to play a video game, and the family follow, but are distracted for 2-6 hours by Cody showing them around his penthouse and turtle museum before they are reminded by Cody that Mikey is still missing and resume pursuit. We meet a few of the villains for the first time (the Street Phantoms and the Peacekeepers). At the end of the episode, Cody explains that he’s the one who trapped them all here and graciously allows them to stay in his home (which they proceed to wreck in every single episode to follow). Change, we learn, is something you have to make the best of when it hits you unexpectedly from behind.

Example: Playtime is Over vs. Christmas Aliens

Plotline: Mikey is obsessed with a specific toy that is newly released. Initially unable to get one for himself, he suddenly finds himself involved in the local gang’s plot to steal the lot for money. Despite being briefly mistaken by the police for a co-conspirator in the theft, he manages to return the toy to its rightful owner/distributor in the end.

Except in Christmas Aliens, we get a fully fleshed out episode highlighting Mikey’s independence, competence under pressure, fighting skills, and compassion for his fellow humans (when he decides to steal the toys from the thieves and return them to the owners (orphanage) himself. He even goes one further in the end and decides that what he really wants is to give the toys away himself, and the whole family ends up volunteering at the orphanage and agreeing that he has done a Good Thing today.

In Playtime is Over, we get an entire episode of Mikey as a selfish, single-minded and obsessive “gamer”, fulfilling every early 2000′s stereotype of the same: he doesn’t shower, there is trash everywhere, he doesn’t care about his training or his family; the entire “subplot” (such as it is) of getting Cody to hook up with Starly in the mall passes him by entirely; and the only reason he gets involved in the theft at all is because he wants to get a game for himself, not to help others. He cheats, he lies, he cuts in line, he belittles others. At several points, he screams “GIVE ME MY GAME” at the episode’s villains. The entire episode is about Cody finding balance, yet Michelangelo serves only as the bad example of how not to be in contrast; he doesn’t learn anything. When Starly reveals that she got him a copy of the game in the end, he immediately goes back to video gaming, and his whole family agrees that he’s being Bad About This in a way that somehow warrants an entire second episode later on to resolve.

It is actually ridiculous, upon my most recent rewatch, how very similar these episodes are, except Playtime is Over is so much worse in every aspect and the perfect example of the Flanderisation that’s going on in FF. Like, if PiO came before CA somehow I’d call that character growth, but since they are several seasons apart I’m just... ???? what ????

ANYWAY:

These are just two episodes that stuck with me during the recent rewatch that serve to portray my frustrations with Fast Forward as a show. We’ve already seen most of these plotlines, and we’ve already seen most of these villains, and Fast Forward just falls short at every single turn. I am still baffled how they made an entire episode featuring “Raphael says out loud that they finally have a chance to walk the streets in daylight and wants to go do human things for fun, but the rest of the family prefers to stay at home and play video games” and then just... kept having everyone stay inside to play video games for the next 20 episodes after that. Talk about a missed opportunity.

[fanficstartrekouat]

Captain vs General

With no other options left and with General Zod closing in on her position, Snow reaches for her Phaser and sets it to stun. She knows that she is only the captain of a vessel and that Zod is a general of a military force. This puts her at a significant disadvantage, and the odds of her survival seem grim.

Snow: "I don't want to fight, I want a peaceful resolution!"

Zod: "Peace is for the weak. That's something Jor-el never understood."

Snow is trying to avoid any kind of violence and hopes to come to a peaceful solution with General Zod. However, Zod's opinion of her peaceful resolution is one of disdain and he is unwilling to even consider it. It seems he may not have any intention of letting Snow survive this encounter.

Snow: "Sorry." She fires, and although the shot hits Zod it only minimally damages him.

Zod: "Come out little girl come out!"

In response to Snow's feeble attempt to hurt him, Zod has become completely enraged and is now determined to hunt her down like a predator hunting its prey. She doesn't seem to have much of a chance against the superior Zod.

Zod: "Look. You'll spend the rest of your life in the Phantom Zone with all of the dangerous criminals from Krypton. You fit right in hahaha!"

He seems to be relishing his own victory against Snow. His amusement at her misfortune and joy at trapping her in the Phantom Zone paints a darker picture of how this encounter will end. It seems like she is truly doomed to a life in the Phantom Zone without any hope of escape.

Snow has not given up yet. She has noticed that stunning General Zod has had no effect and is now wondering if using a lethal setting will work. She is in hiding and studying her surroundings in order to make a plan and hopefully escape her current predicament. Time is of the essence and she will have to act quickly before Zod finds her and takes her to the Phantom Zone.

Zod is clearly enjoying the hunt. He wants Snow to have hope so that he can take it away and destroy her spirit. Meanwhile, Snow has noticed a fancy futuristic fan, which she shoots at. The fan falls on top of Zod, possibly providing her with an opportunity to make an escape. However, Zod is a very powerful individual and Snow is aware that this is probably only a small setback for him. She needs to act quickly and find a way to completely immobilize Zod so that he cannot pursue her further.

Snow: "He survived, but how am I going to save everyone? Despite the Fairytale being a very large ship with high-tech equipment for deep space exploration, it can't fit an entire planet on it."

Snow is concerned that despite the resources of a large and sophisticated vessel, it is not enough to save the population of an entire planet. With Jor-El's family and the people of Krypton still trapped on the surface of their planet, it's unclear how Snow will be able to help them. She will be forced to think creatively in order to find a solution.

Snow "I can do it. I just need an opening. " As she finishes speaking, she realizes that Zod has caught up to her. The problem is she has nowhere to run, as she is near a very deep pit.

Zod "The hunt is over and I win." He says this with a smirk, now more confident than ever that Snow will not be able to escape. Snow is completely surrounded and without many options at this point. The hunt is indeed over, but who is the real winner here?

Snow and Zod enter into an intense fight. Snow uses her phaser to attack Zod, but to her surprise he is able to easily evade it. Zod then fires back at Snow with his own gun, forcing her to take cover. Their fight is now a battle of wits as each tries to outsmart the other. Snow desperately needs to find a way to incapacitate Zod and prevent him from taking her to the Phantom Zone.

Snow takes advantage of her surroundings and shoots a tree, which almost hits Zod but he stops it with his bare hands. Snow seizes the opportunity while Zod is occupied and shoots his legs, temporarily preventing him from walking. Now that Zod is disabled, she grabs this chance to run for her shuttle. However, her hopes are quickly dashed when she arrives at the shuttle and sees that it is gone. It seems like the situation has hit a dead end for Snow and there doesn't seem to be any hope to prevent her from being taken to the Phantom Zone at this point.

Snow takes advantage of her surroundings and shoots a tree. The tree almost hits Zod but he stops it with his bare hands. She takes the opportunity and shoots Zod's legs, stopping him from walking. Snow runs in the hopes of boarding her shuttle, but to her surprise, it's gone. With Zod temporarily disabled, it seemed like a possible chance for escape. However, once she arrived at the shuttle and saw that it was gone, it seemed like her hopes were quickly dashed.

Snow wonders if Jor-el betrayed her and saved only himself and his own family, ignoring her request and the fate of the people of Krypton. She quickly considers the possibility that Jor-el might have been captured as well, in which case she certainly doesn't stand a chance against the entire military. With Zod temporarily disabled and the shuttle gone, this situation seems hopeless for Snow.

Snow: "Where are Ensign Jane Potts and Lieutenant Merida? I know I came here with them."

Snow is trying to find her friends and crew members, but it doesn't seem like they are with her. They must have been separated during the conflict with Zod. As the captain of the ship, Snow would feel responsible for their safety, and the fact that they are missing is concerning.

[superectojazzmage]

A Handy Summary Of The Star Wars Franchise:

The Phantom Menace: Two hours of political babble interspersed with cool fights and annoying CGI characters. Introduced the world to George Lucas’s… interesting dialogue. Not as bad as you remember.

Attack Of The Clones: The real worst movie of the Prequel Trilogy. Obi-Wan Kenobi IS Philip Marlowe while Natalie Portman makes an admirable effort to act like she’s turned on by child murder. Worse then you remember.

Revenge Of The Sith: Depression - The Movie. The bad guy wins, the good guys are dead or turned to evil, the Galaxy falls to darkness, and the asthmatic cyborg will never get to finish his lightsaber collection.

A New Hope: The one that started it all. The heartwarming story of a himbo farmboy who joins a radical terrorist movement at the urging of an old man who says he’s a wizard. Really more of a framework and jumping off point then a real story, so everybody says they love it but don’t have much of anything to really say about it.

The Empire Strikes Back: Aw yeah, now we’re talking! The best of the mainline movies. The Rebels come out swinging and get their shit kicked in while James Earl Jones and Mark Hamill have a touching father-son reunion and Boba Fett steals the show. Not as shocking as it used to be considered because everyone copied it.

Return Of The Jedi: The OT movie everyone has mixed feelings about. The epic conclusion to George Lucas’s personal story in the setting, dragged down by the addition of hideous funk singers from my nightmares and militant Care Bears. According to Disney, nothing that happened in this one mattered btw!

The Force Awakens: Brace yourself for disappointment. J. J. Abrams blows up the Star Wars universe to get everything back to the “Empire Vs Rebels” status quo and set up his mystery boxes. Tricked you into thinking the Sequel Trilogy would passable.

The Last Jedi: Subverted your expectations that it would be good. Rian Johnson tries to salvage what Abrams did to the Star Wars universe and do something edgy and new, to severely mixed results. Luke Skywalker drinking alien titty milk was kept in but him mourning his brother-in-law’s death was cut as “unnecessary”.

The Rise Of Skywalker: Disney tries to stick the landing and breaks their legs instead. J. J. Abrams throws a shitfit over what Johnson did with his mystery boxes and torches the Star Wars universe down even more. Somehow… this movie is not good. How is this possible? Dark business, corporatizing, secrets only the Mouse knew.

Rogue One: Everybody’s dead, Jim. The Dirty Dozen if it was set in the Star Wars universe. A giant continuity filler manages to be infinitely better then the entire Sequel Trilogy.

Solo: Now the story of the smuggler who lost everything and the acclaimed director who had to film his origin story. It’s Solo Development. The tragically underrated and unlucky one, guilty of nothing but being released at a bad time and quite good removed from that.

Droids/Ewoks: Ah, yes. “Droids and Ewoks”, the first two Star Wars television series made back in the 80s, of generally poor quality and so painfully divorced from the Star Wars aesthetic that nobody acknowledges their cursed existence. We have dismissed that claim.

Clone Wars Microseries: The real first Star Wars TV show. Genndy Tartakovsky makes one of the most kickass cartoons ever in one of the most limited time frames ever. General Grievous gave you nightmares as a kid.

The Clone Wars: “This is for kids?” - The Series. The sprawling, epic story of a failing decadent government’s final days, occasionally interjected with painfully out of place juvenile comic relief. One of the big reasons for the Prequel Trilogy’s salvaged reputation.

The Bad Batch: Immediately after the Clone Wars, a crack commando unit was persecuted by the Empire. These men promptly escaped to the galactic underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them... maybe you can hire The Bad Batch.

Tales Of The Jedi Cartoon: Dave Filoni wants to get those unmade Clone Wars episodes finished and he WILL goddammit! Totally dickteased you by making you think it would be a TOTJ adaptation.

Rebels: The wacky, fanciful, fun-filled story of a terrorist cell waging guerrilla warfare on a tyrannical fascist government. Fights an uphill battle to meet the standard set by Clone Wars, and ultimately succeeds.

The Mandalorian: Dave Filoni and Jon Favreau show Abrams and Johnson how it’s done, God bless them. Pedro Pascal is sent on an epic quest to recreate “Lone Wolf and Cub” using a Yoda-themed Cabbage-Patch Kids doll. Meanwhile, the Mandalorians continue to uphold their most important cultural tradition; hating other Mandalorians.

The Book Of Boba Fett: They fucked with the wrong Māori! Boba Fett tries to become a crime lord but accidentally becomes a civic planner instead, while also going on drug trips and learning the ways of the proud “Native American Metaphor” people. Probably not what you expected it to be, but not necessarily in a bad way.

Ahsoka: Ahsoka and Sabine’s Excellent Adventure. Lucafilm decides to finally resolve plot threads from Rebels over a decade later. Tremble in fear as Rosario Dawson makes the women in your life question their sexuality.

Obi-Wan Kenobi: Live footage of Obi-Wan aging terribly due to the stress of his awful life and getting sassed by little girl Leia. Meanwhile, the Inquisitors have some office drama. Shockingly weak despite a lovely premise and some great performances. Tremble in fear as Ewan MacGregor makes the men in your life question their sexuality.

Andor: Disney starts scraping the bottom of the barrel for Star Wars spin-off ideas. Nevermind this show fucking slaps. A treat for all those fans who wanted more dark, gritty Star Wars. Sex becomes canon to the Star Wars universe as Cassian Andor re-enacts Ocean’s Eleven and some more Imperial office drama leaves numerous people dead.

Resistance: The crappy Sequel Trilogy equivalent of Clone Wars and Rebels. Shows great potential but is hobbled at every possible turn, fails utterly to mature, and ends with a whimper. At least the animation’s nice.

The Holiday Special: THIS DIDN’T HAPPEN.

Dawn Of The Jedi: The painfully obscure origin story of the Jedi Order and the chronologically earliest Star Wars story. Both more and less interesting then you would think.

Tales Of The Jedi: The awesome as fuck and woefully underrated comics that form the backbone of the whole Star Wars universe. Civil wars, tragic falls from grace, hot Sith-On-Sith action, crazy battle sequences, great characters, and a surprising amount of busting ghosts. What more could you want?

KOTOR Comic: John Jackson-Miller bridges the gap between Tales and Knights using the most pathetic failure of a Jedi ever and his quest to not get murdered for bad grades. None of the characters are who you think they’re supposed to be, except when they are.

Knights Of The Old Republic: You were Space Hitler all along and you didn’t even know! Now redeem yourself by completing side quests and beating up your disabled former friend… or screw that and use Force Persuade to bully people into giving you free stuff. BioWare makes the best Star Wars game ever and ever amen.

Knights Of The Old Republic II - The Sith Lords: Winner of both the “Unnecessarily Long Title” and the “Tragically Unfinished But Released Anyways” awards. Drew Karpyshan’s adventurous writing is replaced with Chris Avellone’s edgy nihilism. An annoying old shrew badgers you to question things while never letting you question her ever. APATHY IS DEATH.

The Old Republic: Post-EA BioWare begins their long and glorious history of shitting on their legacy by refusing to make KOTOR 3 and instead producing a Titantic-shaped MMO that inexplicably did NOT sink and die. Enjoy it for what it is, just don’t regard it as canon for your own sanity.

Knight Errant: A Jedi becomes a social activist in Sith Space. Kinda cool comics and books set between the Old Republic era and Darth Bane. Could’ve bloomed into something more interesting but Disney hates fun.

Darth Bane: A based and red-pilled Sith Lord decides the other Sith are doing it wrong and sets out to do it right. An entire novel trilogy built out of a character and backstory detail that didn’t even make the final script of Phantom Menace, and it’s awesome.

The High Republic: Novels and comics about the Jedi spending their glory days fighting evil plants and a bunch of a anarchist rednecks who know hyperspace magic. Still finding it’s feet but wins lots of points for creativity.

Darth Plagueis: A sweet old evil wizard gets backstabbed by his apprentice after getting shit-faced. Probably one of the most important novels.

Open Seasons: Jango Fett’s Life Fucking Sucks - The Comic Book. Contains vital lore for the Mandalorians which Disney took over a decade to acknowledge.

Jedi Apprentice: The prequel to the Prequels. Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan squeeze as many quirky stories as they can into the timeframe right before Phantom Menace.

Starfighter: A pair of great flight sim games set in the Prequel Era. Play as a various mercenaries, soldiers, and privateers and engage in direct action against Space Amazon the Trade Federation. You WILL love Nym.

Bounty Hunter: Jango Fett battles criminals, monsters, fallen Jedi, Mr. Krabs, and annoying level design in this sweet video game tie-in to Attack Of The Clones. Have fun getting distracted chasing after side targets!

Republic Comics: Quinlan Vos is a loose cannon Jedi who doesn’t play by the rules! Also, lots and lots of war crimes happen. One of the few EU works to be fully endorsed by Lucas himself but surprisingly (and undeservedly) obscure despite it.

Republic Commando: SWAT but way cooler because it’s Star Wars. Your tactics will confuse and frighten your men. There’s some supplementary novels too, if you feel like listening to Karen Traviss bitch about the Jedi and suck Mandalorian cock for several hours.

Battlefront: Call Of Duty but way cooler because it’s Star Wars. Watch out for those wrist rockets!!!!

Empire At War: StarCraft but way cooler because it’s Star Wars. Have fun making rancors eat people.

The Force Unleashed: God Of War but… well, it WISHES it was cooler because it’s Star Wars. Fun gameplay is held back by a completely ridiculous story resembling a terrible fanfic that is so embarrassing its barely considered canon, if it is all (it usually is not).

Purge: Rubbing the salt into the wounds of Order 66, starring Darth Vader!

Dark Times: That title ain’t a fucking joke. A Jedi struggles to keep his morals in one of the darkest, bleakest, edgiest Star Wars comics ever written. Seriously, this will give you depression.

Jedi - Fallen Order: The Dark Souls of Star Wars. Cameron Monaghan gets his ass kicked by Oogdo Bogdo so you can get that new poncho.

Vader Immortal: Battle Darth Vader himself with the power of a gimmicky thousand-dollar VR video game accessory that almost nobody owns!

Han Solo Trilogy: The ORIGINAL secret, depressing origin story of Han Solo. If you don’t feel like reading books you can just watch Solo, it’s basically just a distilled version of this.

Marvel’s Star Wars Comics: Comes in two flavors: batshit crazy 80s-era Marvel or bland and worthless 2010s-eras Marvel! At least they do great reprints.

Splinter Of The Mind’s Eye: A really really really weird early novel. Notable for being one of the first EU works and for the copious amounts of accidental incest-shipping.

Tie Fighter/X-Wing: Simulate being a pilot in the Star Wars universe, complete with getting killed by Darth Vader for minor mistakes.

Empire/Rebellion Comics: A cool and underrated little pair of comics depicting the day to day of the war between the Rebels and Empire.

Agent Of The Empire: SECRET AAAAGENT MAN! SECRET AAAAGENT MAN! James Bond comics in the Star Wars universe.

Shadows Of The Empire: Is is a comic, a video game, a book, or a toyline? The answer is yes. Important mostly for how it helped establish how the Star Wars EU could actually function.

Aftermath/Shattered Empire: Disney’s clumsy, boring attempt to make their own Post-ROTJ canon and justify the Sequel Trilogy that will be subsequently contradicted by the Sequel Trilogy itself. Roundly ignored by just about everyone aside from Cobb Vanth and periodic vague token mentions of Operation: Cinder as a thing that happened we guess.

X-Wing Rogue Squadron: Michael Stackpole sends Wedge Antilles and his merry men out onto zany, continuity-fixing misadventures and ends up creating the Chad Fel Empire that makes the Virgin New Republic look bad. Comes in comic, book, and video game forms for easy consumption!

Crimson Empire: One of those Amogus-looking red guys that follows the Emperor around takes center stage and surprises you by being totally awesome.

Squadrons: Disney’s discount version of the X-Wing/Tie Fighter games, but now with an immersive first-person perspective and a yawn-inducing story.

Luke Skywalker And The Shadows Of Mindor: The awesome novel everyone forgets. Matthew Stover fixes Star Wars continuity by pitting Luke Skywalker against his mightiest enemy yet; bad fanfiction.

The Thrawn Trilogy: The REAL Sequel Trilogy. We got military competence and clones all up in this joint! Timothy Zahn sets a standard that future Star Wars will constantly struggle to meet. You WILL root for Thrawn.

Dark Empire: Somehow… Palpatine has returned several decades before Disney did it. Generally viewed with withering contempt by everyone, which makes one wonder why Disney copied it so much over the rest of Legends. Surprisingly not the worst thing looking back.

Dark Forces Saga: KOTOR’s main competitor for title of “Best Star Wars Games”. Kyle Katarn and Jaden Korr spend four increasingly awesome video games torturing stormtroopers with the Force, solving frustrating puzzles, and busting ghosts.

The New Rebellion: Another awesome novel everyone forgets. Luke Skywalker fights one of his students turned evil. That, uh, happens a lot.

Young Jedi Knights: A fun little series of novels about the Skywalker kids becoming real Jedi, and also war crimes. Yet another example of what people WANTED the Sequel Trilogy to be.

Hand Of Thrawn: Weekend At Bernie’s, Star Wars edition, guest-starring psychic furries. Timothy Zahn sits down the EU writers class and shows them how writing for Star Wars is done.

Union: Luke Skywalker and Mara Jade get hitched and promptly get caught up in an international incident proving once and for all the power of the Skywalker Gene.

New Jedi Order: The Star Wars universe is invaded by Warhammer 40K rejects in the epic novel series that breaks all the rules, for better or for worse. Of variable quality for large stretches but ultimately settles down on being pretty awesome, if overly dark at times.

Dark Nest Trilogy: The Jedi fight a bunch of evil bugs. It exists, and that’s about all it has going for it.

Legacy Of The Force: Jacen Solo’s No Good, Very Bad Fall To The Dark Side. Has WILDY varying quality and is mostly just the nightmarish location of a huge spat amongst some of Legends’s writers. Still not as bad as Dark Nest and has some cool bits sprinkled in here and there. But really, you’re better off just skipping to FOTJ.

Fate Of The Jedi: The Jedi and Republic battle corrupt politicians, Cthulhu, and the backwoods yokel version of the Sith in the real sequel to NJO. Things get back on track after the disaster that was LOTF. Deeply flawed in some respects, but ultimately pretty good and a fitting finale for the Post-OT era.

Legacy: The spectacular chronologically final story. Politics, war, redemption, and Cade Skywalker getting high off his ass on deathsticks in the grand final battle between the Jedi and Sith.

Visions: Star Wars finally achieves its lifelong goal of becoming a kawaii as fuck anime. It’s an anthology so quality is all over the place.

Infinities: What If… Star Wars had a terrible ripoff of Marvel’s “What If…?” comics?

Tag And Bink: Abbot And Costello Meet Darth Vader.

LEGO Star Wars: Your childhood comfort food. Spend countless hours of non-canon fun killing Lego Jar Jar and trying to find all the goddamn unlockables.

Legends Canon: The original continuity. Free and experimental but wildly inconsistent at times.

Disney Canon: The new continuity. Relatively consistent but often stifled, bland, and overly-safe.

Your Personal Canon: The only real continuity.

[delightfully-deranged-dagur]

How is your version of the Monster High movies different from the canon? Like, what’s your version of Why Do Ghouls Fall in Love, Escape From Skull Shores, Boo York, Scaris: City of Frights, Fright On, Ghouls Rule, Friday Night Frights, and 13 Wishes? I would LOVE to hear how you would rewrite them for your Reimagined series!! I also love how you have background characters like Invisi-Billy and Johnny become the main cast instead of just all girls. I also want to know what town Monster High is set in because they never said WHERE the movies take place.

Okay, this is gonna be a long one. Let's start with the name of the town near Monster High. Old Salem. Cuz the human town in Ghouls Rule is named New Salem. That's all I could come up with.

Now. The movies. Aka, The Timeline!

Let's begin. (Keep in mind that this could change in the future)

New kids at School.

A new School year at Monster High. We get to see the first month of school for new kids, Frankie, Gil and Abbey. We also get to see Invisi-Billy dealing with his new roommate Johnny Spirit.

Main Cast : Frankie Stein. Toralei Stripe. Draculaura. Clawdeen Wolf. Cleo De Nile. Deuce Gorgon. Lagoona Blue. Gil Webber. Abbey Bominable. Heath Burns. Clawd Wolf. Invisi-Billy Where. Johnny Spirit. Ghoulia Yelps.

Fright On!

Belfry Prep and Full Moon high merge with Monster High, bringing a bunch of new students with them. Most notable being Gory Fangtell and Dee O'Gee. Both leaders of their respective student body and they absolutely hate each other. Starting a race war between Vampires and Werewolves. With Clawdeen and Draculaura caught in the middle. And if that's not enough, the so called "human-monster relationship expert" is actually planning on hunting them all down.

Main Cast : Draculaura. Clawdeen Wolf. Clawd Wolf. Howleen Wolf. Romulus Timberwolf. Dee O'Gee. Gory Fangtell. Van Hellscream.

Why do Ghouls fall in love?

It's valentines day at Monster High. Also Draculaura's birthday! And Clawdeen is determined to make it the best day ever for her girlfriend. But Draculaura's ex-boyfriend Kieran Valentine shows up with the intend to win her back. Meanwhile Johnny deals with the fact he might be falling in love. And what secrets does the office of former student, C.A. Cupid hold?

Main Cast : Draculaura. Clawdeen Wolf. Kieran Valentine. Johnny Spirit. Invisi-Billy Where. Frankie Stein. Toralei Stripe. Cleo De Nile. Deuce Gorgon. Neightan Rot. Holt Hyde.

Skull Shores.

A group of students go on a special trip to Skull shores. The best monster friendly vacation resort in the world! The Wolf sisters try to sleep during the day to enjoy the night with Draculaura and Twyla. Johnny asks Neightan for love advice. Hoodude leads Manny, Iris, Wydowna and Billy on "exciting" Island trips. Lagoona helps Gil with his fear of the ocean. And Frankie, Toralei, Cleo and Deuce go on a mystery boat trip and make a huge discovery.

Main Cast : Frankie Stein. Toralei Stripe. Cleo De Nile. Deuce Gorgon. Andy Beast. Bartleby Farnum. Johnny Spirit. Neightan Rot. Lagoona Blue. Gil Webber. Hoodude Voodoo. Manny Taur. Iris Clops. Wydowna Spider. Invisi-Billy Where. Draculaura. Clawdeen Wolf. Howleen Wolf. Twyla Boogeyman.

Friday Night Frights.

Two rollerblading teams. Monster High vs Granite City. Only one winner. Let the race begin!

Main Cast : Operetta Phantom. Clawd Wolf. Clawdeen Wolf. Robecca Steam. Lagoona Blue.

Ghouls Rule.

Frankie gets upset over the incorrect presentation about Halloween. This is nothing like what she read about. She gets some surprising support from Johnny Spirit. He knows what Halloween is and this is wrong. But trying to show how humans really act during Halloween ends with Jackson and Holt getting arrested by humans! It's time for the Monsters to save them.

Main Cast : Frankie Stein. Johnny Spirit. Jackson Jekyll. Holt Hyde. Claire. Chad. Lilith Von Hellscream. Toralei Stripe. Invisi-Billy Where.

Scaris : City of Frights!

Clawdeen wins an opportunity to intern under her fashion icon. Moanatella Ghostier. But she's in competition with 2 other designers. Skelita Calaveras and Jinafire Long. Meanwhile, Rochelle goes searching for her missing boyfriend Garrot with the help of Spectra and Operetta and the local street artist Catrine DeMew.

Main Cast : Clawdeen Wolf. Draculaura. Rochelle Goyle. Operetta Phantom. Spectra Vondergeist. Garrot Durogue. Skelita Calaveras. Jinafire Long. Catrine DeMew. Moanatella Ghostier.

13 Wishes.

Howleen is going through a lot and the bullying from Gory Fangtell just sets her off. She ends up with a magical lamp containing a genie, Gigi Grant. Howleen, still in a fragile state of mind easily becomes manipulated by the shadow genie Whisp. Howleen's wishes end up making Gil a daredevil with no regard for his safety! And she erases Cleo from everyone's memory, almost everyone. Seems artificial minds are immune to genie magic. Clawdeen just wants to help her sister but things don't go well. Can Howleen be saved before it's too late?

Main Cast : Howleen Wolf. Twyla Boogeyman. Clawdeen Wolf. Gigi Grant. Whisp. Cleo De Nile. Robecca Steam. Hoodude Voodoo. Lagoona Blue. Gil Webber. Frankie Stein. Toralei Stripe. Ghoulia Yelps. Abbey Bominable.

Frights! Camera! Action!

Draculaura gets the chance to become the next vampire queen. Of course, she prefers to go on a quest to find the real one. And right when she's away is when Valentine and Whisp return trying to redeem themselves.

Main Cast : Draculaura. Clawdeen Wolf. Cleo De Nile. Deuce Gorgon. Robecca Steam. Clawdia Wolf. Honey Swamp. Viperine Gorgon. Kieran Valentine. Whisp. Elissabat Von Vamp. Lord Stoker.

Freaky Fusion.

It's Monster High's anniversary! And in an attempt to learn more about the past of the school, the ghouls end up going to the past! Where Robecca gets to meet her missing father. They try to return but once they get back to the present, they experience some interesting side effects. They fused! Can the hybrids help Cleolei, Lagoonafire, Clawvenus and Ghoulankie to cooperate?

Main Cast : Frankie Stein. Ghoulia Yelps. Cleo De Nile. Toralei Stripe. Lagoona Blue. Jinafire Long. Clawdeen Wolf. Venus McFlytrap. Neightan Rot. Avea Trotter. Bonita Femur. Sirena Von Boo. Viktor "Sparky" Frankenstein.

Haunted.

Frankie is being haunted. While Toralei is tormented by the return of Meowlody and Purrsephone. Spectra spreading rumors isn't exactly helping. While Twyla, Rochelle, Garrot and Sirena try to help Frankie with her haunting, Toralei joins them as they follow Spectra into the ghost world. And poor Johnny literally gets dragged into the adventure leaving a distressed Invisi-Billy no other choice but to get Headmistress Bloodgood involved.

Main Cast : Frankie Stein. Toralei Stripe. Spectra Vondergeist. Twyla Boogeyman. Rochelle Goyle. Garrot Durogue. Sirena Von Boo. Johnny Spirit. Invisi-Billy Where. Headmistress Bloodgood. Principal Revenant. Porter Geiss. Kiyomi Haunterly. River Styxx. Vandala Dubloons.

Boo York!

Catty Noir invites some friends to join her to Boo York where she's gonna perform at a royal wedding. The same wedding Cleo was invited too. Upon arriving they learn Cleo's disowned father somehow promised her away in an arranged marriage. While they come up with a way to break the marriage, Catty's voice gets stolen by the werecat twins, employed by Nefera De Nile. During the chaos Johnny decides now is apparently the right time to confess his feelings for Billy. Also, there's a meteor. And it's a musical. Yay!

Main Cast : Catty Noir. Cleo De Nile. Deuce Gorgon. Ramses De Nile. Nefera De Nile. Pharaoh. Johnny Spirit. Invisi-Billy Where. Neightan Rot. Frankie Stein. Toralei Stripe. Meowlody and Purrsephone. Luna Mothews. Elle Eedee. Mouscedes King. Astranova.

The Great Scarrier Reef

A fight between Lagoona and Toralei results in them falling into the pool, suddenly transported to the Great Scarrier Reef. And they're not allowed to leave until Lagoona faces her demons. For once Operetta and Johnny agree for Lagoona to hurry up so they can stop being half fish!

Main Cast : Lagoona Blue. Toralei Stripe. Gil Webber. Frankie Stein. Operetta Phantom. Johnny Spirit. Kala Mer'ri. Posea Reef. Peri and Pearl Serpentine.

Scarily Ever After

During the great school clean up. Draculaura finds a magical book in the attic. Suddenly, she, Clawdeen, Cleo, Deuce and Johnny get pulled into a fairytale maze where they run into the students of Ever After High, Raven Queen, Apple White, Maddie Hatter, Briar Beauty and Sparrow Hood, trying to stop The Evil Queen, Raven's mother, from enslaving Monster High. As if that's not enough, a magical stream swaps the Monsters with the Fairytale students. And who's this mysterious Euna?

Main Cast : Draculaura. Raven Queen. Clawdeen Wolf. Maddie Hatter. Cleo De Nile. Apple White. Deuce Gorgon. Briar Beauty. Johnny Spirit. Sparrow Hood. The Evil Queen. Euna.

And that's all I have so far. Of course there's stuff happening in between. Like the Bloom and Gloom and Freak Du Chic. But this is what I have so far.

[killugonficlibrary]

Killugon: College AU

"There’s no way these lovestruck cantaloupes are passing their classes.” ~worm in theory

2 Series. 21 Works. 1 Tumblr.

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Oh My God, They Were Roommates by korns  ( T | 125,170 | 27/27 )

After a terrible first semester, Gon transfers to a university in San Francisco where he gets a stellar deal on a one-bedroom apartment.

At least, it was a stellar deal until he moves in and realizes that he inadvertently signed a lease with a complete stranger as a roommate. Not only that, but his accidental roommate is the single hottest guy in his major, Killua Zoldyck, and everyone and their mother is trying to get with him.

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Critical Hit by korns  ( T | 55,847 | 11/11 )

After a medical crisis, Gon's confined to bedrest and he needs to do something—anything— to keep his mind occupied, even if that thing is the latest game on the market: Hunter Vs Hunter. Gon becomes consumed by the world of gaming and streaming where he finds a famous, furious, and devilishly handsome streamer by the name Kill.

When Gon's dorm friend introduces them in a match, Kill's fanbase goes crazy because of one simple fact: That Gon is an absolute newbie who can kick Kill's ass any day, any time.

Kill won't stop until he ends Gon's winning streak—even if that means flying Gon out to a nation-wide HvsH tournament to face off, kick ass, and meet for the first time.

Series Part 1 of Trending: Kill’s Lifestyle Vlogs

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No Filter x Serial Dating by korns  ( M | 71,287 | 14/14 )

Gon is a serial romantic with an addiction to online dating. Killua is the barista stuck taking the orders of every date Gon Freecss reels in. It wouldn't be an issue if Gon wasn't such a hot topic—star running back for the Yorknew University football team as a freshmen, member of the most iconic fraternity at Yorknew, and general campus heartthrob.

When Gon convinces Killua to be his gym buddy, it sounds and feels like the friend zone. But who knew the #GymLife was so gay anyway? Certainly not Killua.

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[Series] college is a scam, here’s why: by callmebyyourmango ( T | 4,228+ | 2 Works | WIP )

college is a scam. these fics will tell you why.

CURRENTLY PUBLISHED:

1. group projects require comfort [ 1/1 chapters ] 2. core requirements are unnecessary and expensive [ 1/1 chapters ]

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[Series] Warning Signs by vitrifica ( E | 14,671+ | 2 Works | WIP )

Wet dreams are making Killua's life hard- especially when he realizes his best friend is starring in them. When a storm traps Gon and Killua together for the night, can he keep his fantasies in check?

CURRENTLY PUBLISHED:

1. Caution: Wet [ 2/2 chapters ] 2. Tripping Hazard [5/? chapters ]

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Tease by kornspiracy  ( E | 132,115 | 22/22 )

No fucking way, Killua thought. There’s no way Gon is a porn star.

He clicked onto the account’s profile page. There, in perfect clarity, was a picture of Gon Freecss’ face.

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The Only Exception by yahlreh ( M | 124,844+ | 28/? )

Sex. That's all Killua wants. Afterall, love doesn't exist in his mind, but that all comes to a close as soon as he meets his new roommate - Gon Freecss. Upon meeting the happy, go-lucky boy, Killua can't help but want to indulge on him, but it never seems to be enough as he allows his heart to constantly get in the way.

Warning: This story is heavily laced with mature themes and sexual content. Read at your own pace.

Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7g4EuDtd1xAvvu7mXnzz9H?si=78f0fb13b62c4d5d

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phantom pains by sunsetters (sanitized) ( T | 43,957 | 11/11 )

Killua moves into his new apartment.

He's not alone.

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The Bells Are Ringing by DecemberCamie  ( T | 4,432 | 1/1 )

“Gon,” Killua interrupted. He was clenching his jaw so hard it hurt. “Why don’t you have any pants on?!”

“Hmm? Oh, but I do! I have my-”

“That’s your underwear!” Killua’s voice jumped an octave. “That doesn’t count!”

“Yes it does! All the important bits are covered, so it definitely counts!”

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Dragons vs Foxbears by  DecemberCamie  ( T | 4,972 | 1/1 )

When Gon first meets Killua, he’s drunk and stumbling through some party Zushi dragged him to after losing the match. He doesn’t know what bar he’s in, what time it is, or how he got there. He doesn’t even know Killua’s name when he challenges him to a fight. All he knows is the white haired guy is wearing the opposing team’s colors—

And then Gon is on the ground.

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To Break Pose by DecemberCamie  ( T | 4,695 | 1/1 )

Gon asks Killua to be his model for his full-body art portrait project. It takes some begging, and bribing with chocolate, but eventually Killua agrees to help.

The thing is, though, Gon never expected for Killua to model nude.

The other thing? Gon finds he really doesn't mind this new development.

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College AU [Tumblr] - DecemberCamie  ( T | 739 | 1/1 )

“How about a challenge to speed this up?” Killua started, lifting his gaze to lock on Gon. “I quiz you, you answer. If you answer right, you get a reward.”

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Socially Unacceptable Pickup Lines by korns  ( T | 7,948 | 1/1 )

Gon Freecss is the new lone wolf on a campus founded on cliques, frats, and sororities for paranormal species. With everyone and their grandmother trying to recruit Gon, the co-op where Killua and his rag-tag team of mixed-species seems to be the last place on Gon's list.

Until Gon agrees to visit under the pretense of meeting a ghost and maybe, possibly hitting on Killua while he's there.

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Thinking In Circles by korns  ( T | 10,362 | 1/1 )

After signing a lease together, Gon takes Killua out to celebrate and their innocent night turns into a kiss on the front lawn of a frat house. As a flaming asexual, Killua is mortified and pitched into a downward spiral. To top it off, they're both bound for a two-day road trip to their shared internship in the middle-of-nowhere Utah.

Stuck together and on the cusp of an existential crisis, Killua has to decide just how, exactly, to broach the nature of their relationship.

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Don’t Hold Back by Anon_Co_op  ( E | 12,761 | 2/2 )

Gon cussed, thinking of all the different ways to call himself an idiot.

They all sounded like something Killua would say.

Would Killua still call him that if Gon said he was in love with him? . Or, Gon and Killua's 'friends with benefits' arrangement takes the 'un'-expected turn for the worse(?)

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there’s glitter on the floor after the party by reeyachan  ( T | 1,195 | 1/1 )

Gon never drinks.

And Killua wonders why in the world he would decide to try it now, of all days, of all nights. Why now, when it's less than 12 hours before graduation?

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freudian slip by slowlange  ( E | 15,171 | 1/1 )

“Our entertainment for the night. Or at least, I hope it is.”

Leorio throws a confident gaze to his audience before pulling something much, much smaller than a blunt.

Or, Killua and Gon trip on molly together. The events that ensue may or may not change Killua for the better, and show him that there's more out there that life has to offer.

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Cracked Lens by bluphacelia  ( T | 7,949 | 1/1 )

A soft peel of classical music assaulted his senses as a soft yellow light spilled into the hallway—a night class? He continued forward, trying to keep his footsteps quiet. He felt the tug of curiosity and he glanced through the door, eyes flittering past easels and canvases and he stopped—paralyzed. There in the midst of art students was the perfect portrait. 

-- Gon finds something he didn't know he was looking for.

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Art & Honey by wtfquitplayin  ( M | 4,402 | 1/1 )

Killua is forced to go to a party, forgets his lighter, and meets Gon.

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Stellar Date by losing_sanity_fast  ( T | 3,627 | 1/1 )

Canary wins a date with Gon in a lottery, but she's a) a lesbian, b) in a relationship so she doesn't want to go. As a joke Killua decides to go instead of her. Gon already has tickets and a reservation so he just rolls with it.

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Dungeon x Hunter by sub_divided ( G | 13,683 | 4/4 )

Every Sunday Killua, Gon, Leorio and Kurapika meet up to play "Dungeon x Hunter" (loosely based on DnD 5e) with Leorio as Dungeon Master. Why is Leorio the DM, you ask? Well, these nerds all met at the college roleplaying club two years ago, but recently, with Kurapika in law school and Leorio in med school, and Killua and Gon taking harder undergrad classes, no one has time to meet up anymore. Therefore, Leorio has taken it upon himself to DM their sessions, just as an excuse to get everyone together once a week.

Alluka, also a college student, is staying with Killua during the Christmas Break. Having heard about these Sunday roleplaying sessions from Killua, and especially about the antics of a chaotic multiclass druid/barbarian who keeps adopting all the animals (Gon duh), she asks if she can come along. The crew welcome Alluka into the nerd fold as romance gradually blossoms between Gon and Killua, and Leorio fights to keep Kurapika from ghosting them all as a stress response to lawschool deadlines.

Basically a heartwarming slice of life story about nerds playing Dungeons and Dragons. I'll be updating Wednesdays and Sundays until all the chapters are posted.

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First x or x Hundredth by gomicchi  ( M | 1,837 | 1/1 )

Killua pays very little attention to his philosophy lecture. Gon tends to his duties as a part time groundskeeper. The first case may or may not be related somehow to the second.

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Wait, We Had a Test Today?! by itiaskia ( M | 21,096+ | 4/? )

College is certainly an experience, to say the least.

It's a time for self exploration, learning lessons, making terrible decisions, and meeting people you either never want to leave or never want to see again.

Gon didn't really know what to expect, but it wasn't what he got. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The one where everyone meddles in Killua’s and Gon’s relationship by tulip05  ( M | 6,327+ | 4/? )

Killua thinks Gon likes girls, more specifically Retz, and that they're the perfect couple. Gon thinks Killua is way too cool for him. They're both wrong. Good thing they have friends to meddle.

[metalsonic41]

Archie Sonic AU : Metal Sonic v3.9/Metallix

Story : after the genesis wave, the archie universe got reboot, but there was still the original timeline existing, the original timeline sonic just wake up with megaman and said goodbye to each others before go back to their worlds, eggman saw the fight of metal sonic 3.8 and bass vs sonic and megaman, he saw that metal was gonna win if megaman didnt used sonic friends powers, so he saw the potential metal has, so he managed all his efforts to find a power gem (will tell how he got it later), he gived the gem to metal, he upgraded metal a lot before give him the gem, metal has become very smart, he decided to not rebel against eggman now, he has a strategy, he planned all the future event of my AU, he planned the sonic unleashed, lost world, generation, forces and idw equivalent for the archie, after archie infinite was beat, he took his phantom ruby to keep it for later, he hided it somewhere, eggman knew nothing of that, in the equivalent of idw but its archie in neo metal sonic saga, eggman gived him the neo form, but he decided to keep it later, he made an illusion of metal with the phantom ruby he stoled, to make them believe they were fighting him and win, but he has other plan, he used his morphic abilities to take sonic appearence to kiss amy (who was sad that sonic was with sally) to reveal himself later, wich broke amy heart more, so she decided to stop comunicate with the others, metal was a great mastermind.... he also remembered shard, who he killed, he didnt regreted very much (a bit because they kinda brothers) but saw that nicole was trying to fix shard, so he manipulated her to find the emeralds to fix shard.... but it was a trick for metal, he decided to test his need strenght on sonic, by taking the old metal sonic (3.8) appearence with his morphic powers, he beated sonic easily, but he still took some scratch and marks, but he wasnt hurt, his gem (based on a srb2 mod and idw gem) had the power to change abilities, speed boost, flight (he already can fly so its useless exept to make a wind protection around him), strenght boost, slow time, become smaller, teleport, electric shield, teleguided attacks, and he also can become neo when he need, then he decided to not only kill sonic, but to rassemble all his friends, ennemies and allies to beat them by his own, to prove how strong he get, but before he decided to fix the eggman robots like, metal tails, tails doll, metal knuckles, metal amy and some shadow android to make them take revenge too, he didnt upgraded them to 3.8 because he didnt wanted them to become a danger if they rebel, so after doing that, he decided to go see scourge, and help him, he saw all scourge potential, he knew that scourge was stronger than sonic, since he beated both shadow and sonic, the only reason he lose was because he didnt have a plan and got tired by using his super forms, so he took the anarchy beryl to use them with the chaos emeralds and master emerald and phantom ruby to see what happend, he will then fight against all sonic ennemies and allies he got, deadly six, infinite, time eater, all sonic friends to only beat them, he showed difficulty against dark sonic and chaos shadow, and super sonic and super shadow were stronger than him.... until he became neo and beat them up, before sonic could become ultra sonic metal then said "i am not metal sonic.... i am metallix.... and now you can call me... NEO METALLIX" then beated all of them, he cutted sonic legs and told him "i wont kill you.... i will humiliate and disable you...." but killed eggman and leaved tails in coma, he leaved everyone almost dead but still alive to make them feel their pain, then he go back to base metallix/metal sonic 3.9 to kill them finally but shard (who got fixed in time) came and teleported them away with chaos control.... metallix had 75% of Mobius under his control, that was the first part of my AU, maybe i will make a comic about it

Funfact : he did a jojo references once

[metanoiamorii]

❛Maybe we are not meant to be, not yet. Maybe we’re stars, waiting to collide in another life.❜

♧ Title: Be Still My Foolish Heart [BSMFH]

♧ Status: Brainstorming & Drafting

♧ Point of View: Third

♧ Genre: Fantasy, Action, Drama, Romance

♧ Warnings: Violence, War, Death of major and minor characters, nudity, past abuse, generational trauma, generational healing, racism, transphobia, homophobia, character corruption arcs, ethics vs morals, star crossed lovers, tragic endings, codependent and complicated relationships.

♧ Featuring: Diverse LGBTQ+ characters, enemies to friends to allies to lovers slowburn, complex and complicated characters, fantasy religions, plenty of symbolism, complex world building, ethics vs morals, a whole lot of moral grey can be fit into this bad boy, character redemption and corruption arcs, some found family, learning to separate one from their family's trouble and taking control of their life, soulmate trope, setting the groundwork for future generations.

♧ Setting: An Ancient Chinese inspired, fantasy setting

♧ Synopsis:

In Oidien there has always been a defined split against the Heavens and Ghost City. No one can remember what sparked the feud between them, it's possible after all these years of the fighting and endless war... they don't even remember themselves. They know it's tradition to keep fighting, to ensure the cycle of violence continues. So that is what they do; they keep fighting.

In recent years, the King of Ghost City has drawn back from the fields off battles and distants himself from politics. He leaves the affairs in his eldest children: Lianhauzi holds the crown, Lutaizi knows his way around the court, Suming’qiu is gifted with the army, and Taixuan is there to ensure everyone takes a break, to take care of her family.

A fight against children is how the Heavens view it... To their surprise, these children are more than gifted than their father. This isn't a game to them, it's a livelihood. They know how to secure a victory within minimum casualties, and they know how to balance one another's weakness.

The Heavens cannot take another loss. No matter how many battles they have lost, they have always managed to win this war. Each time. But on this account? They're afraid to admit they've been beat. So they come to a resolution: they have to take out one of the links. Take out one and the rest should crumble.

It's...

Not as easy as one would imagine. Or so their spies in court relay. The four know to keep their distance in public, and if they meet in private no one knows. They handpick their servants carefully, and they ensure each servant knows their tasks and do not overstep. They've taken every precaution necessary.

Even when it works, when one of their spies is welcomed inside that well guarded, hidden court... no one expects the game of cat and mouse to transpire. Their spy is humored until she's willing to change her allegiance and eventually is brought into the family by marriage... In the very least, she offers the weakest link to exploit to destroy the family.

♧ Tease

Of all I have done,

Forgettable they to none;

Has it now begun?

No, not forgiveness.

That I would never ask for, love.

I wish, regret comes.

You know as I do,

Games I once played, have turned you,

A pretty face blue.

I made no mistake,

You know as I do, the stakes

Required; played.

Once, for you, my rule

To survive, I broke, for you;

That forsaken dual.

My conscious it haunts;

My sleep, in dreams it will taunts

And it brings your scorn.

Pour me a wine glass,

For my sanity to last

And my wrath? To trap.

For me, preform; dance

Distract me with your nice laugh

Until I collapse.

And leave, in silence,

See to it, quiet your lips

Of the truth won't slip.

Allow me my sleep,

Don't be cruel, do not slight, cheat

You ugly she-beast.

A single night, peace,

That is all I ask for, please...

Better, just leave.

I have discovered,

Regret? No, I now confessed

Not for you, coward.

♧ Excerpt:

Her booted feet pattered against the puddles of rain droplets as she hugged the umbrella close to her shoulder, protecting herself from the storm. In a hurry she rounded the corner, following after the image of a soaked cat that had caught her attention and ran before she could approach it properly. It had been the first time in awhile since she had taken to sprinting, to follow the cat. Around the corner Xihuli came, brought to an abrupt halt when she turned into another person, as insane as she was to be out in the midst of a storm.

Her umbrella clattered to the floor, dropped as she staggered back a pace. The bright red silk was out of place, spinning upon the rain soaked ground. She gained her footing, no longer staggering to place distance between them. Her head threw back, an angry look quick to find purchase upon her features. Having yet to reach for her umbrella, the rain begun to soak the bright red and white silks she wore, drenched and sticking to her figure. "Watch—"

Her protests are so abruptly cut off. She watches the man tilt back his own umbrella, dark as the stormy sky with red spider lilies imprinted upon the fabric; the hanging tassels brush against his form, parting to expose his face. A youthful face that should have been smiling, with those eyes— so red to match the spider lilies upon his umbrella— staring at her as if she were a lesser being. The umbrella sits back upon his shoulder, head tilted forward with his chin forward, a sign he was in fact superior to her.

"Don't you know better, Zhuque?" The tone he speaks in, it's unlike that rambunctious voice he's known for, full of laughter that becomes too obnoxious for the ears. How serious it is, no jest spoken, no room for his games. He stares her down, staring through the dangling tassels of his umbrella. And how unkind that look is, a look that's no better than a wolf staring at a lamb. "You should never be out so late."

The two men, another prince and his own dog. Wine and lilac gives him away, wearing the golden lotus crown in his hair. Face unfriendly, a natural scowl he had been born with. He stands beneath the umbrella held above his head, keeping him dry from the rain. Held by that fucking bastard, smug and vain, with the bones acting as hair pins. He's uncaring if he gets wet, of course he is. When he controls the ocean why would he care about a little storm?

Lianhauzi pulls back his hood as he now stands blocking the last exit, Lutaizi and An Huli keeping the woman pinned in. He takes a step forward, Xieyuan moves with him, holding the umbrella in place. When he steps forward they all watch Xihuli push herself back, struggling to press her back into the wall, able to stare in each direction where one was coming from. "The fear in your eyes betray you... You know why we are here."

♧ Characters:

Love Interests

Shenguai Suming’qiu; Heizhao-jun

Amab • Agender • He/Him • Asexual • Reciproromantic

The Fourth Master of the Phantom Palace; that has earned the name of Black Sinister Claws. Said to be cursed from birth, as he has come to age and stepped into the politics and warfare, he has come to be their lucky charm. A conniving young man with a sharp intellect, and a shaper wit. For his family, he has taken up the role as master of intelligence and handles all correspondence, planning, and diplomacy. As a front, he appears an apathetic man, detached and void of all emotions, only hellbent on his work; only his siblings and a selected handful are able to see another side of him.

Yi Xianzi; Courtesy Name Ke’ai

Afab • Genderfluid • She/They • Pansexual • Demiromantic

The Young Mistress of the Yi Manor is a woman with high and strong morals, and lives to maintain peace for the Heavens, and secure a future for the younger generations. She bears conflicted emotions of supporting her mistress’ less than moral ambition, but often does not speak of them and turns a blind eye instead; she tries to justify these actions for the greater good, despite knowing better. Often at times, she is torn between her loyalty to her household, and her own sense of justice and morality.

━━━━━━━━━━

Phantom Paradise

Shenguai Bixie’e; Guiwang

Amab • Nonbinary • He/They • Pansexual • Apothiromantic

The King of Ghost City. Despite years and generations of war with the Heavens, he remains undefeated and stays alive. Defying the odds, many believe he is unkillable, and quite well, untouchable. He has retired, for the most part, from the battlefield, and remains within the Phantom Palace, allowing his children to helm the war. He spends his time with his concubines, or with his council. Few see his face, fewer are able to gain an audience with him.

Shenguai Lutaizi; Heige-jun

Transmasc • Genderfluid • He/They • Omnisexual • Demi-Homoromantic

The unorthodox First Master of the Phantom Palace; that has earned the name of the Lord of the Black Song. First in line to the throne, he has conceded his right to it, and would concede his own royalty if not for his siblings. Despite being a Prince of Ghost City, he is nothing like his father. Carefree and reckless, he would prefer to spend his days drinking, goofing off, and living life to the fullest, uncaring of a familia grudge that makes little sense to him.

Shenguai Taixuan; Duandaojian-jun

Transfem • Nonbinary • She/They • Demisexual • Panromantic

The Second Master of the Phantom Palace; that has earned the name of the Princess With A Broken Blade. She takes greatly after her elder brother, and refuses to partake in a war that has not personally done her wrong. Despite her heritage, she is a woman with a strong sense of justice, morals, and honour. She protects her family from harm, and she will not turn away someone in need, no matter their origins. Opposed to being a sister and a daughter in her family, she fills the role of mother and acts as the woman of the household.

Shenguai Lianhauzi; Baoli’jífeng-jun

Amab • Agender • He/They • Asexual • Akioromantic

The Third Master of the Phantom Palace; that has earned the name of the Violent Tempest. Pressed by his elder siblings, he has taken up as their father’s heir to the throne; the Crowned Prince. He is known for his bad temper and strict nature. At heart, he has good intentions, he lacks the best judgement to execute his intentions.

Shenguai Kuangre Ai Du De; Dubo'mogui-jun

Amab • Genderfluid • They/He/She • Pansexual • Cupioromantic

The Sixth Master of the Phantom Palace; that has earned the title of the Gambling Demon. He is a man unaffected by grudges, politics, responsibilities. He prefers to take a page from his brother, Lutaizi’s, book and spend his time enjoying life to its fullest. He is very much a hedonist, and a compulsive gambler. Everyone he meets, he is obligated to gamble with them, at least once. The catch? He’s capricious, he’s erratic, and he will always change the game and stakes with every person.

Shenguai Jiaxiu; Mei-jun

Amab • Genderfluid • He/She/They • Pansexual • Frayromantic

The Seventh Master of the Phantom Palace; that has earned the name of the Beauty Lord. Arrogant and narcissistic, he is a very conceited man. He enjoys simple flattery and having others fawn over him, being the center of attention. Out of admiration he has taken after his brother, Suming’qiu’s, footsteps and assists him with his tasks. Himself, he carries out the more… darker duties called for, and gathering information; assassinations and spying tends to be his expertise.

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The Four Calamities

An Huli; Chui Feihong

Transfem • Agender • She/They • Homosexual • Homoromantic

Little Fox, as she’s called, is the favored of Prince Lutaizi, and the oldest of the Great Calamities. She is a woman who knows what she desires, what she is determined to do, and she refuses to allow anything or anyone to stand in her way. She comes off to be blunt, spiteful, angry; a she-devil, some claim in kinder terms than a bitch. Ahead of her time, she refuses to hide herself behind a mask, to be perceived as a gentle woman when, in truth, she is a walking storm, and for that, many frown upon her.

He Ruxie; Hei Xieyuan

Amab • Agender • He/They • Demisexual • Gyneromantic

Lord Black Water, as he is called, is the favored of Prince Lianhauzi, and the second of the Great Calamities. Formally a scholar in his past life, he experienced a string of bad luck, costing him his family, his wife, his daughter, his livelihood, his freedom, and soon his sanity. When he perished in his mortal life, he returned as a malicious spirit, and soon came into the service of the Shenguai family and serves loyally and viciously

Da Chen; Nitu Guiguai

Transfem • Nonbinary • They/She • Asexual • Demiromantic

The Enlighted One, as they are called, are the favored of Princess Taixuan, and is the third of the Great Calamities. In their previous life, they lived the life of an honest priest, surrounded by corruption and sin. When they met their end, their resentment for their peers remained and thus they rose to power to root out the corruption and seek retribution. Of the four, they are the amicable. They often forgo emotions and act only in rationality. Their mind is never clouded, and each act they make are in good conscious. Good will is shown to those that live an honest life, no matter their origins; ruin is shown to those are decide to live a dishonest life.

Wusi Linghun; Bai Wulian

Closeted Transmasc • Agender • He/They • Akiosexual • Demi-Akioromantic

The White Devil, as he is called, is the favored of Prince Suming’qiu, and the youngest of the Great Calamities. Formally a young lord in the Heavens, he turned his back on a betrothed he held no affection for. Openly, he cast aside his previous life, to serve the Shenguai family, and became a quick aid to the Fourth Prince. He is said to be two-faced, in some encounters being ruthless and apathetic, and other times he is genuine and compassionate; a toss up upon which side someone will see when their paths cross with him.

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The Heavenly Host

Meng Zhang; Courtesy Name Amnizha

Transfem • She/Her • Demisexual • Demiromantic

The First Master of Dongbu, and the acting Qinglong. Kindness is the one rule she lives by: kindness to her family, kindness to her allies, kindness to a stranger, kindness to her foes. She sees no reason to rule with fear and hatred, and actively will not promote negative emotions. She is a stern and serious woman, she takes pride in her knowledge, her power, and securing the truth. Behind closed doors, she opposes Xihuli and the Emperor, knowing both have secrets they would prefer to keep buried, in public she maintains an appearance of being a close ally.

Ling Guang; Courtesy Name Xihuli

Cis-female • She/Her • Demisexual • Apothiromantic

The First Master of Nanfang, and the acting Zhuque. Openly, she is perceived as a compassionate woman, who puts the needs of her people before herself, and acts selfless; in truth, she is surprisingly violent and vulgar. She continues to fuel the war, slandering and starting rumors of false deeds to rile the public, and gain the support of her supposed allies. There is nothing she is not willing to do to gain fame, support, and what she desires.

Jian Bing; Courtesy Name Cixia

Afab • Genderfluid • She/They • Asexual • Demiromantic

The First Master of Xibian, and the acting Baihu. She is known for being a compassionate woman, she wears her heart upon her sleeves, and acts out of the goodness of her heart. She openly encourages peace, to cease endless war and bloodshed; to make amends. For which, she is seen as an enemy to Xihuli, but is a close friend to Amnizha. Her only downfall are her chronic illnesses that have left her sickly since birth.

Zhi Ming; Courtesy Name Lu'yongshi

Amab • Agender • He/They • Closeted Homosexual • Homoromantic

The First Master of Beifang, and the acting Xuanxu. He has a reputation that precedes him as an honorable gentleman. He is a man of his word, he acts in accordance to justice and honor, and rarely strays from it. At heart, he is a warrior, and lacks the delicacies for social greetings; he comes off as blunt, uninterested, distant, and often lacking a heart to care.

Zhi Shi; Courtesy Name Yansbi

Cis-female • She/Her • Asexual • Aromantic

The younger sister of Lu'yongshi, the Second Master of Beifang, and acting Xuanshe. She happens to be her brother’s polar opposite. She is less than honest, she lacks honour, she craves power, she will use blackmail to get what she desires. As, she is not above blackmailing and guilting her own brother to act in accordance to her own agenda. She is also a close associate to Xihuli.

Long Jianhong; Courtesy Name Canren

Cis-male • He/Him • Bisexual • Apothiromantic

The current Emperor of Zhongxin, and the acting Honglong. A prideful man that cares more of his own person than his own people. Often, he turns a blind eye to all suffering, and allows Xihuli to do as she pleases. He is a womanizer, with various concubines’ , and elicit affairs with others. He was loveless to his wife, as there are rumors he was behind her untimely death. Whether these rumors are true or not are unproven, and few challenge them out of fear.

Long Shisan; Courtesy Name Li Busengren

Amab • Genderfluid • He/She • Quoisexual • Quioromantic

The Fourteenth Prince of Zhongxin. With twelve siblings in line of succession to the throne, Li Busengren acknowledges the chances for him to be the heir are little to none; this is added by the factor of being, from birth, his father’s least favorite child. With a will to prove his father wrong, and desperate for his father’s approval, he’s ready to do anything for an ounce of recognition.

Taglist

BSMFH: @writings-of-a-narwhal, @kittensartswriting, @inkflight, @qelizhus,

General: @endlesshourglass, @writerray, @poore-choice-of-words, @alexwritesfiction, @primusesgiantmetalballbearings

Both: @cecilsstorycorner, @little-boats-writes, @hazard-writes, @egg-shark

[jamiedc-they-them]

Who you used to (and can no longer) be (Platonic)

Requested Imagine: Dany x Brother reader, maybe reader was caught by Cersei and is reunited with Dany. idk its a stretch but it came to mind. it can be angsty or nah whatever u want, B

  It had been a while since you’d seen anything but the small reflection of light from a torch on the cell door. It had been a while since you had heard anything but the rats in the cell that you were thrown into months ago or the creaks of the door or the rustles of your chains.

You got a new sound, that being of the door opening. You also got a bit lighter, for a moment that was. The door was then slammed closed, and a voice that was anything but new spoke.

“Still awake? Hm, I have to give you the fact that you’ve lasted longer than I thought you would,” The taunting voice of Cersei Lannister spat as she approached you, goblet of wine in her hand as always, “Then again, you were always the odd one out, weren’t you? The little Targaryen runt? I do have to wonder though, what your whore of a sister will do to get you back?”

She came even closer to you, now towering over you, “See, the families all live up to their sigils, don’t they? Lannister’s as lions who tear their enemies apart; the Starks, the lucky wolves in a pack who can survive the winter; then there’s the Targaryen’s,” She poured the wine onto you, aggravating your wounds.

“As the feisty, fiery dragons, with so many scars. What’s one more though? Although, I’m sure to your sister, it would make all the difference between you being worth saving and you being left behind to rot. But we’ll see.”  

 It had been a while since Danny had been able to sleep. It had been a while since she had been able to think straight and not have her mind on something other than the fact that her brother was still missing.

It had gotten to the point where she had accidentally called Jorah, Y/N. The man hadn’t minded, of course, he politely corrected her and moved on. Still, it showed. It showed how much of her mind was chipping away at a plan to get you back and safe.

“My Queen,” Daenerys turned to Tyrion, the one who had called her name, “Maybe we should make preparations for when we get Lord Y/N….Make preparations for as to how to proceed.” He suggested, struggling to find a correct way to phrase it without triggering and setting her off.

“What do you mean?” She questioned, blunt and with a bit of fear and tremble in her voice.

He looked to the others for a moment before proceeding, “I just mean, that Lord Y/N will not fully be the same Y/N we knew before his capture…We’ll need to tread lightly. He will be traumatized.”

“But he’s still my brother.” Danny said without hesitation, firmly.

“He doesn’t mean it in offence, your grace,” Missandei said, trying to clear things up, “What he – we mean, is that Y/N will be different, and we need to be aware of that.”

Danny nodded, “We will, but I know Y/N, and I will do what is best for him.”

They didn’t meet eyes, but the others could tell that it wasn’t exactly true. She’d work on a phantom form of you.

One that didn’t exist anymore.

 “Your grace!” A soldier said as he entered the throne room, holding a folded piece of paper, “I have….” He took a moment to catch his breath, have you seen how many steps their were to get to the throne room?

“.I have news on Y/N, Cersei Lannister has him! She wants to meet!” He yelled, giving a brief synopsis of the letter.

Wow, this really wasn’t royal at all, was it?

Then again, the soldier seemed to know that, when it came to you and your safety, royalty was thrown out the window.

Daenerys stared at the soldier in shock. It seemed that the plan that she had devised on her own was also out the window.

 “It’s obviously a trap, if anyone knows my sister well enough to know one of her devious schemes, it’s me.” Tyrion made his thoughts on it known. Don’t go.

“Of course, it is,” Grey worm then turned to Danny, “You shouldn’t go, my Queen. Or, if you do, at least bring some guards with you. I’ll find you my best men –”

“No,” Her words stunned all the room, “Cersei asks for me, she gets me alone. I’m not risking Y/N: I’m not losing the only family I have left.”

She knew it was risky. She knew that this could just be something that would end up with the two last Targaryen’s                 being killed. But she also knew that she couldn’t just leave you.

She had to bring you home, to make you feel safe once again.

 It was the dead of night but hearing Tyrion gasp and knock chairs over made everyone rush to the meeting room. There, it held everyone bar one.

Daenerys.

“She left.” He announced in a solemn tone.

There was no stopping her now.

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Being the youngest made Daenerys’ motherly side show itself so much more than it ever had. Or, unfortunately, more than she ever got the chance to show it. Losing her child was hard, don’t get her wrong; to lose a life she would never know and that would be her own by blood and fix the mistakes.

Now, you were that. You were the thing she had to protect, no matter what. It had started with your brother, his abuse that went more to you as a way to punish her; two birds and all that.

Her maternal instincts made her help comfort you; it helped her help treat your wounds; it helped her be more empathetic; it helped her get through it, putting her mind of helping her younger sibling through the pain kind of helped her through her own.

 She had to admit, the small crew she had brought for the boat did a good job. Was it the most royal of arrivals? No, but she couldn’t play the trump card of the dragons yet. She had to get you back with as little hassle as possible.

Power play’s from her could wait. It could wait until she had you to help council her on it. You were always a smart one smarter than her and always willing to listen to others while arguing your own view.

She was losing it, she had to admit. Hell, she’d sailed all the way with barely any protection, so that wasn’t nothing. Still, if this was it, she didn’t want to make it worse for you.

If this was it, at least you’d be together in the end. The Targaryen siblings vs the world; the world might win, but it wouldn’t win without you both giving it one last chilling smile of acceptance.

“You’re hear to see Queen Cersei?” The guardsman asked. If he had any other right to speak, he probably would’ve mentioned the lack of guards. Still, part of Daenerys appreciated the fact that he didn’t, that he simply let it go and led her up at her nod.

Yes, she was here to see the queen. No, she was not there to burn it all down.

At least, not yet, anyway.

 The stones were sharper here. In Dragonstone, it had a smoothness to them that made it feel like you were almost gliding on them. It definitely helped make it not feel as big as it did, steps wise.

These were different, these were jagged and edgy; small bits pointing out that dug in a few instances. Definitely not well kept.  

Still, that was put aside when she reached the top. In reaching it, she saw you on the floor. She finally got a good look at you. In the dreams (and nightmares) she’d have of finding you, it’d always be you either looking normal or you being too bloodied to recognise.

This was a mix but leaning a lot more towards the dreams than the nightmares (which, unfortunately, came more often than the dreams did). You were bloody, just in your nose and a cut on your lips; your eyes weren’t too bad, if not a little fucked up from punching.

Over than that though, you were breathing and alive. When you met eyes, you looked scared more than relived. Then again, she was riding a high of relief at just seeing that you were ok.

Now came the part where she kept you and herself that way.

 “I must admit, I didn’t expect you to arrive,” Cersei said as she sipped her wine, “Then again, when one of your flock are hurt, the others huddle around them, don’t they?” She taunted.

However, the fire in her eyes died a little when she saw that it was just Danny, “Came alone, did you? It could’ve been a trap.”

Still could be, “It may have been, but I wasn’t going to just abandon my brother. Just as I’m sure you wouldn’t.” She knew it was borderline flattery. But she had to not piss her off.

“Are you alright, Y/N?” Danny asked, fire completely gone from her eyes and a soft gaze replaced it; one filled with love and familial concern. She was dead certain that these types of looks (ones of comfort and respect and love) were something that you had been sorely missing.

There was silence at her answer. You looked as if you hadn’t even heard her question. She, however, didn’t lose hope. You were still in there somewhere.

“Boy,” You looked to Cersei with a shaking body, “Answer your sister.” She commanded.

You looked at Danny, eyes fearful and slightly unfocused. You only nodded, all-be-it slowly.

“Verbally.” Cersei said, not in a snap, but a calm voice.

“I’m alive.” You croaked out.

“Louder.”

“I’m ok.” Your words finally reached Danny, and she could hear just how unused your voice had been. It was raw, and it had cracked.

She could see that you clearly weren’t. But she could deal with that later.

  “Why did you ask for me if it wasn’t a trap?” Daenerys asked.

Cersei paused, her face showing that it was a valid question, “Because, I wanted you to see what a broken Targaryen looks like. The mess that they can be. The pain that they can be in. You see, when you do fully come here, to try and take what you believe is yours, maybe you’ll remember this.”

 “He hit me.” You were shaken, still shaking as you sat on your bed and your older sister knelt in front of you.

She took your shaking hands in her own, “He did, yes.” She said, regretfully.

“Why? What did I do to make him hate me.” Your question broke her heart a little.

“You did nothing, dear brother. Nothing. It’s all his ego,” She comforted. She knew, sadly, that the damage had been done. But she knew one thing, she wasn’t going to let it destroy you.

Not you.

 “You can have him,” Danny looked at Cersei in shock, “Take it as a warning. As a precautionary tale.”

 Danny didn’t waste any time in coming to you and picking you up. She didn’t look at Cersei, only you. She then hugged you. You stiffened but didn’t hug back. She didn’t seem to mind much though. She just held you tightly.

She had you, and you were back with those you belonged with.

Now she just had to return home.

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The ride back, you sat in your room. Well, you laid in your bed, more like. You only ate when she would bring you food. She wanted to be the one to do it, she knew that you wouldn’t respond to anyone else.

She didn’t try and get you to speak. She knew that you wouldn’t want to and trying to force you to would only lead to more problems.

Still, at least she didn’t have to order the crew not to bother you: they seemed to just know from the get-go.

 “I have no choice in this.” She told you, trying to not allow her voice to tremble and show you the fear she felt. She had to be strong for you.

“I can’t just lose you.” You said in quiet voice. Your fear ruled you. Whenever you had been hurt, she had been there to help you; to help you rise back up when you fell.

Now, that would be gone.

She glided to you, kneeling once more to your level. She put her fingers under your chin and lifted it up, “Whatever happens, we go together. I’m never leaving you, little brother. Never. I’ll protect you as much as I can.” She promised you and pulled you into her arms.

You hugged her back, fearfully.

 The boat arrived, and there stood four or so angry advisors. Well, angry and relieved. Danny walked slowly, holding your hand and arm, and helping you walk down the ramp. She had almost not done this, as you had flinched and pulled your arm away when she went to touch.

However, after a moment, you had allowed it. She led you down, fully concentrated on your wellbeing. She didn’t take any notice of her friends. She only said one thing to you.

“We’re home.”

 The tent was big, but that didn’t matter to you. It was lonely. You were lonely. However, you didn’t tell her; you knew she had enough on her plate, and your issues would only add to that.

“Hey,” You looked up at her soft eyes that seemed to notice your turmoil, “We’ll be fine. We’ll make it through this to the other side, together. I promise, you’ll be fine.”

 “I kept it the same. I didn’t want to touch anything just in case you wanted to make any changes yourself.” You nodded mutely as you entered your room. In the past, it would be a place of comfort, a place where you could feel almost free. This was not that. This place felt foreign and the warmth was something you were used to, just in a torturous way.

The first thing you did was close the curtains.

“You used to love that in the morning.” Your sister didn’t know why she said those words; but she still had.

“Maybe, but not anymore.” You used to be quiet, but this was the quietest she’d heard you.

 She remembered the first time she had been forced to have sex with Drogo. The way he was in charge and she whimpered. She had still been holding out some sort of hope that she could get away from his.

She knew she wouldn’t be able to. She knew she had to adapt.

So, she did. She gave into it. She gave into him. Deep down, she was still the scared little girl who had been dealing with her own trauma. But that girl was repressed more and more.

In the name of survival.

 She had woken on a brand-new day. She woke up with some vigour this time, just happy to have everything back to normal in a way.

She got up and ready for the day, taking in the view from her room.

She then left to fetch you. She felt like a walk would maybe help you a little. They had in the past after all.

However, when she knocked on your door, she received no answer.

“Y/N, it’s me.” She said softly, hoping that announcing that would help you.

Still, the door did not open.

When she went to knock again, she stopped herself when she put her ear to the door only to hear nothing inside.

She put her hand on the handle, turning it. It went all the way; the door was unlocked.

She opened it fully, and her eyes widened, and her breath quickened at what she saw, an empty room.

 She didn’t think she could run this fast, yet here she was. She was yelling orders, “Find Y/N!” Was the main one she was able to track.

You were missing again, but this time it was voluntary.

Now, she just figure out where you had gone. Where you had taken yourself to.

She stopped, letting oxygen fill her lungs. As she took deep gulps, she pressed her back against a wall and took a moment to think; to actually think.

 “Come on!” You cried out in excitement as you led your sister by the hand to your destination.

“Slow down, Y/N.” She tried to be serious, but your happiness made her have a smile of her own at your enthusiasm. You had always been a more pessimistic one, but these moments that could last for a while and bursts of happiness made herself happy.

“Here.” You said, stopping and lowering your hands, pulling her towards you.

Ahead of you laid a lake. It wasn’t the largest, or the deepest. But, still, a small lake was a small lake.

The sun seemed to catch the water just right and it shimmered.

“Oh, Y/N, it’s beautiful.” She said, softly. She took the view in. This beat anything from her window for sure.

 That was the day before you were taken. It was a memory that she both played over and over again, but also wanted nothing to do with it.

Now it was the key.

She knew where you were now. Only thing was, the context of your visit had changed. Just like you had had.

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She was right, you were there. You were sat down instead of stood. She watched you for a moment. Actually, saw you for who you were now. Yes, you were still her brother, but you had changed.

She approached you, taking a seat next to you. For once, she didn’t try to force anything. Instead, she just looked at the view, taking in the head and the peacefulness of the place. It was nice.

“I started to have visions while I was there,” She was the now the one looking up at you. However, she didn’t talk, “I couldn’t tell you when I started to do that. It just kind of….happened. Moments where I would see things that a rational part of me knew wasn’t there, but that part was destroyed by the part that wanted it to be real.”

“Who did you see?”

“A mix of you and the others. To be honest, mostly you,” You looked at her as you continued, “You’ve always been the one to look after me. And I appreciate it, so much. But, since I got back, it’s….it’s just been too much. You’re acting as if I’ll snap right back to who I was, but I won’t. I can’t.” You confessed.

“I know….I know,” She let her voice shake this time. She wasn’t going to hide her emotions anymore. You were old enough and knew enough about to world to know the feelings she had, the fear, the pain, and the loss.

“I’m sorry that I did that.”

“We’ll get there. We’ll get there.” You assured; but it seemed it was more so for yourself.

“What can I do right now?” She asked.

“Just….just stay.”

“Of course.” She assured.

[popculturebuffet]

Blog Updates: New Patreon Stretch Goals, Patreon Exclusive Reviews, New Story Arcs and Other Stuff

MHello everyone. For those of you seeing this through other tags my name is Jake. I do reviews on here that are usually full sumaries of an episode of a tv show or comic, with jokes and analsyis throughout. I’m doing this post as i’ve recently revamped by patreon a bit, check out VIA THIS LINK if your curious. I also have some other stuff going on with the blog that I thought might intrest the general public and especially you lovely followers. Thank you guys so much. Your support means a lot and feel free to interact with this post and any of the reviews. it’s always a pleasure. Leave your comments whatever. So let’s start with the patreon stuff

You Decide the Next Patreon Exclusive Review!: 

Yes YOU will decide the Patreon Exclusive review for May. How? It’s simple: i’m currently reviewing the Lilo and Stitch crossover episodes, the first two this week with the American Dragon Jake Long crossover “Morpholomew” done yesterday, the Proud Family episode “Spats” coming later this week, and “Rufus” (Kim Possible) and “Lax” (Recess) coming next week and the week after that respectively. 

As a way to gage intrest in the shows crossed over, and if I should review some of them on their own, i’m going to be watching the notes, and after the first week i’ll record how many a review got. This way the first review dosen’t get an advantage over the last and so on. Whichever episode gets the most votes wins and it’s show will get two reviews: One exclusive to Patreon in may you can check out for just a buck, and one for all of ya in June. So if you want to dragon up, get louder and prouder, check out what the sitch is, or have some recess, keep an eye on my blog and check out the review. Like it reblog, it, both. This is all in your hands. And if this little contest works out I may do another one like it in the future. 

New Patreon Stretch Goals!:

For those unfamiliar with Patreon it’s a site that helps creators like me get paid for their work, used by such luminaries as Linkara, Pushing Up Roses and greatest of all Rifftrax. 

Stretch Goals are an amount of money I get a month from patreons, that’s readers like you paying me. Even a buck a month would help a lot and help me put out a reviews and LIVE off doing this. But it’s a two way street so in order to entice you lovely people into paying me for doing my job and my passion with these reviews, i’ve updated the tiers, adding a wider and better range of rewards. I’m currenntly up to 15 dollars a month, or close enough that i’ve acitivated those rewards. And if you help me hit these tiers EVEYRONE gets PUBLIC, on here, for free reviews. Thanks to my lovely patreons Emma and Kevin you all are getting reviews of the first 5 Ducktales episode, aka Legend of the Golden Suns, with the second coming as soon as I finish this post. Even a buck helps us reach closer and for your dollar you get access to the discord, exclusive reviews, and to pick a short any time I review a bunch of shorts. And with Goofy’s birthday coming up next montha nd Donald’s after that, now is the best time for that. 5 dollar patreons also get one review as month, with 10 dollar ones getting two. You’ve already probably seen some of these: Kev has used one of his a month to have me review a house of mouse episode every month, and newest patreon and longtime friend Emma is using them to have me review the netflix dr. seuss adaptation “Green Eggs and Ham”. So whatever YOU want me to review I will and you’l lhelp unlock even MORE great reviews. So what do you get if you hit the goals? I’m glad you asked. 

We’re up to 15 so next is...

20 Dollar Tier:  Ducktales 87 Season 2 Mini Series!: Yes indeedy. Already on the Docket was the Super Ducktales Arc, which introducices the OG GIZMODUCCCKKKKK. But since that apparenlty wasn’t enough i’ve also added the OTHER mini series. While i’ll do super first since that’s the one with higher fan intrest once tha’ts done i’ll also review Time is Money, the time travel arc bringing in everyone’s faviroite scrappy Bubba. So if you want a buncha cruncha retro Ducktales pony up. But that’s not all the disney afternoon I got for this tier. 

A Darkwing Duck Episode A MOnth: This one has also been promoted every time I could and still stands. If you like that mind behind the shadow disguise, that daring duck of mystery, that champion of right, then you’ll get one review a month about him, as voted on by you patreons. 

Danny Phantom: The Ultimate Enemy: And since neither of these have helped me so far and stepping back into Amity Park made me realize how much I love the series, even if it’s creator is a 80 tons of smug asshole packed into a t-shirt he thinks is cooler than it is. So it only felt right to add  the ghost boy to the tier and the best way to kick that off is with it’s second best, and only barely second behind Reign Storm, episode: The Ultimate Enemy! Danny finds his future is imperfect and must battle his own evil self! If you want my thoughts on one of the series finest hours, then help me hit 20 bucks a month to keep making content. 

25 Dollar Tier: 

I removed the Tail Spin content, though rest assured I will be covering Plunder and Lightning sometime this year. But what I replaced it with is even better. 

One Danny Phantom Review a Month: YOu like teen superheros? you like ghosts? you like me slagigng off about butch hartman and trying to make it crystal clear his creation dosen’t wholly belong to him? Then you’ll like me reviewing Danny Phantom. And while i’m already doing that, this goal gaurantees one episode a month, and said episode will be voted on by my patreons. So if you pay for this you’ll not only get your monthly dose of going ghost.. but you’ll get a chance to PICK what it is. 

Disney Shows To Movies Trilogy : I’ve decided to make it a tradition for my 15 dollar stretch goals to do a bunch of disney movies. And like with my last batch, which you’ll be seeing in may, i’m doing tv shows that got their own movies, theatrical or otherwise. And this time we’re doing MY generatoin: Kim Possible: So The Drama, the best story in the show’s histroy and the best movie in the Disney Channels! Recess: Schools Out! The suprisingly bonkers unsurprisingly awesome finale to an awesome show! and The Proud Family Movie, another UTTERLY BATSHIT finish to a great show.  Lost at Sea and Seconds: This one’s for my scottaholics, fourth part of my Scott Pilgrim retrospective coming this week!. If you like me taking a look at Scott’s quest to punch the fuck out of his girlfriends exes while growing up a little, then if you help me get to the 30 dollar tier, i’ll also take a look at O’Malley’s other graphic novels Lost at Sea, which follows a girl who lost her soul and her boyfriend on a trip with what may be Young Neil’s older sister, and Seconds, the story of a woman with issues growing up who finds the ablitlity to travel through time.. or is it space? And some of you savvier readers my know he has nother comic. Where’s that one? wellllll

30 Dollar Tier:

Snotgirl: I’m saving this one for this tier. Reviews of each collected volume of snotgirl, Bryan’s first ongoing series, all three so far and any more to come about, unsuprisingly, a  hot mess of a person, this time who might’ve done a murder. You know instead of defintely did a murder but in self defnese and with a longsword. 

Gravity Falls Season 1!: One of Disney’s finest finally on this blog. All season 1 episodes reviewed in some way in some shape in some form.  Star Vs Finale Arc!: You’ve heard me bitch about the problems in Tom’s story, and wil lcontinue to. Now see the terrible way everyone elses ends! From an amazing build up to an awful finish, see reviews of Every story relevant season 4 episode from Butterfly Follies to Cleaved that won’t already be covered in my tom retrospective. It’s a road to crushing disapointment, come on inside! 

35 Dollar Tier:  More Disney TV Adaptations!: Doug’s First Movie! See Doug get really fucking weird in his sea monster based movie with a punch line of a name! Teachers Pet, a great movie out of a show I barely saw! Kim Possible Live action! it’s suprisingly okay! and Recess Taking the Fifth: a compliation movie for a season we sadly never got. 

Gravity Falls Season 2: Buillding on the first reward Gravity Falls Reviews will go beyond the first season and finish the job. From zombies, to dipcifica, to ford to weirdmageddon, I’m doin it all. 

40 Dollar Tier: 

Two HUGE Disney Focused Comics Retrospectives! 

Darkwing Duck: In addition to the show, i’ll start reviewing the awesome follow up comic that got me into it. From the start to both finishes: the unathorized crossover finale and the sadly short lived sequel series from joe books, the worst mistake disney ever made that wasn’t racist, before Artemis Fowl said hold my beer. Also the short lived Ducktlaes series because why not. 

The Incredibles!: The Family Dynamic! A comprehensive retrospective featuring reviews of the movie, the Mark Waid followup, the sequel that ignores said followup and the incomparable Christos Gage’s followup to THAT movie. Also that wonderfuly awful failed tv pilot bob made that he and lucius did a mst3k of. 

45 Dollar Tier: 

Disney Flims Lilo and Stitch a Thon: All four lilo and stitch movies, Lilo and Stitch, Lilo and Sitch 2, Stitch and Leroy and Stitch! All the hawaii, aliens and sequels you can handle!

Amphibia Season 1: I’ve done Season 2 as it comes out, i’ll be doing the same for season 3, so help me get here to see the start at least once a month, but two at a time!

50 Dollar Tier: The last one for now. I’ll probably go to 10 dollar tiers after this. 

The Owl House Season 1: While I wait for the second season to start so I can cover it, have me do the rest of season 1! The only exceptions are the already covered Enchanted Grom Fright and the earmarked for pride month wing it like witches!

The Two Loves and 87 Mistakes of Mordecai: A regular show romancetrospective, as we go through the downs, ups, higher ups and crushing lows of Modercai’s romantic arcs from regular show. His crush on margert, making his move, moving on, moving on to cj, and then the horrible cluster fuck I’ve talked about nonstop and will again and again as one of the worst romantic arcs in memory as they shot the relationship in the foot head and groin! Force me to relive it all!

So yeah I’ll add more tiers, again probably 10 dollars apart if I get to 50, but given I barely got to 15 i’m not optimistic. PROVE ME WRONG. HELP ME HIT 50. 

Other Stuff:

Finally outisde of Patreon, that was the main reason for this, I have news on my various arcs. For one thing i’ll be trying to keep the pace better, so expect at least one entry a month for ones i’m doing on my own time like the tom retrospective, life and times and Scott pilgrims. Ones kev does will be done weekly to keep my wallet afloat. 

I also have two more retrospectives incoming! The first is paid for by Kev: I’l lbe tackling ALL THREE SEASON 2 ARCS OF DUCKTALES 2017. After the headache of trying to cram the della arc into three weeks to keep up with the lena one, I decided i’td be better for pacing if I did all three at once and kev agreed to it, if using his patreon reviews to cushion the blows. So starting next month i’ll be covering the Louie, Della and Glomgold/Owlson arcs, swapping between them in episode order. With that I should be FAR closer to having covered every ducktales episode. Granted i’ll still have 17 to cover, but it’ll make that much more managable. 

The second comes in June specifically timed for Pride Month. With Scott Pilgrim Wrapping up in August just in time for the movie’s anniversary, I decided to start covering another one of my faviorite comics of all time. It’s time to transform, roll out and make this precoius it’s Transformers More than Meets the Eye! For those of you unfamiliar it’s an idw comic that follows a rag tag group of transformers, about half of them gay or gay coded, on a mission to find the lost knights of cybertron and bring ballance to a post war cybertron.. which quickly devloves into hyjinnks with a side order of heartrending deaths and charcter development... and references to dexy’s midnight runners. 

So that’s all for now. thank you for reading, please support my patreon as the next pay term is at the start of next month, so if you want me to start on any of those stretch goals, nows the time. Please help me earn a living and until all are one, i’ll see you at the next rainbow. 

[johannstutt413]

TOURNAMENT ARC 2: PHANTOM VS PROJEKT RED

“Alright, let’s see...Looks like we’ve got a fight tomorrow, Jessie!” The Doctor unfurled a piece of paper from the machine. “First round for Specialists, it looks like; Phantom vs Red. It’s been awhile since Phantom stopped by the office, hasn’t it?”

“...Phantom?” The Feline shrugged; she’d seen records of that Operator before, but never actually encountered them herself.

He sighed. “Right, stealth specialist with mnemonic Arts. Regardless, it’ll be interesting to see what happens, especially since Red- actually, I haven’t seen her recently either. She hasn’t been on a mission, has she?”

“I don’t think so?” Jessica flipped open a tab and scrolled through some of her notes. “No, but she has been on leave for awhile.”

“Really? What kind of leave was it, again? I think you approved that one.”

At that exact moment, Projekt Red walked into the office with a baby in her arms. “Maternity leave.” [not exactly the same universe but hush it’s fine]

“Awww!” The two immediately approached. “What’s their name?”

“Scarlet SilverAsh. I don’t think I can be in the tournament for a while, Doctor; we haven’t moved her to formula yet.” Scarlet fussed a little, which the Lupo solved by licking her forehead.

The Doctor nodded. “That’s alright, Red; I think I know the person to take your spot. Let us know when you’re ready to fight and we’ll put you in the rotation.”

“Thank you, Doctor. I’ll be watching today’s match from home. You can both come over, if you want; Encio’s making burgers.” She watched both of them blink several times. “What?” 

“He can cook?” Jessica asked.

She nodded. “There’s nothing he can’t do. I need to feed her soon. Let us know if you want to come over.”

“Will do!” Once she’d left, the Feline smiled to herself. “I’m looking forward to that someday.”

“Having a kid with me?”

Jessie set her head on his shoulder. “Yeah...We should call Waai Fu now, before too much press goes out.”

“Good plan.”

TOURNAMENT ARC 2: PHANTOM VS PROJEKT RED WAAI FU

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, Operators, Staff, and Esteemed Guests! Welcome one and all to the Top Operator Tourney!!! *crowd cheers*

“Thanks, Hung! Hiiiii everyone! It’s your lovable idol and Penguin Logistics delivery girl Sora here, filling in for Click on account of some rather inflammatory commentary she gave during the last one. Joining me in the booth, filling in for FEater after she punched the person who told them that, is Croissant!”

“That’s right, Sora, and I ain’t goin’ any’re! Now earlya Baws ‘nounced we had a lil’ bituva skejul shift, but looks like we still ‘ave a real good’un on our ‘ands. On the north side, wi’ 14 years of fightin’ ‘sperience, she’s student by day and brawla’ by nite, WAAAAAAAI FUUUUUUUU!” *cheers* “Ye, dat’s wut I wanna hear! Annnnd on the south side- hey, where’d they go?” *confused crowd noises* “Uh...Now I ain’t gonna lie, I never did meet dis Phantom guy? We sure he works ‘ere?”

“I mean, Medical had enough data to evaluate with, so I guess he does? Aaaanyway, looking at the numbers, it looks like Waai Fu has more combat experience and raw strength, but Phantom’s faster and trickier to deal with, so hopefully he shows up long enough for us to watch him work!”

“Ye, let’s ‘ope so! Baws itn’t at the podium today, but Amiya’s down there doin’ the hands, so let’s ‘ear it! 3! 2! 1! LET’S RUUUUUUUUUUUMBLLLLLLLLLEEEEEE!!!”

--------

Down on the ground, as the commentators blathered away, psyching the crowd up, Phantom watched his target from the shadows, blades ready but simply observing. His opponent, an orange Feline he’d never seen before, likewise watched, patient. This wasn’t his usual style...but if it was a show they wanted, then he’d give them a show.

“So you are my opponent.” He took a step forward. “Shall we dance our dance for the masses?”

“The Phantom, in the flesh...I expected to face you later in the bracket, but this works, too.”

His eyes narrowed. “You recognize me?”

“I’ve spent my life clearing the street of scum like you, who skulk in the shadows and take others’ lives for your sick games.” She took a defensive stance. “Your ring of thieves deserved its fate-”

“Do not speak ill of the dead, lest you join them sooner than you expect.” A step backward, and he’d vanished.

Two Phantoms emerged from her shadow, blades drawn to strike as they flanked her, only to find she was ready for both attacks; Waai Fu evaded their swords as knocked both Phantom and his mirror image to the ground. “Repent while you still have time.”

And then everything was a blur.

-------

“It’s like it started out of nowhere! They stared each other down forever, and then BAM! Also, why are there two of him?!”

“I ‘unno, darlin’, but I ‘ope Junior ain’t watch’n this! They’re go’n at it ‘arder ‘n an’thin rite now! I can’t even count ‘ow many blows they’re tradin’, but not a single drop of blood on the ground yet!”

“You can tell Waai Fu’s struggling, though - two on one isn’t a fair fight for anyone, but she’s holding her ground someh- OH, what?!”

“Oh! Oh! That’s the Seven-Styles Kick!! ‘Oly shit, I ain’t ever seen it in person bef’r, but damn that was some’n! And one of ‘em’s gone now!”

“Things have slowed down, and she is absolutely whaling into him! Punch, punch, kick, kick; he’s doing his best to evade them, but I don’t think he can keep up like this for long! Especially since he can’t- never mind, he managed to slash her once, at least, but that just left him open for a solid haymaker! He’s not getting back u/p! 1! 2!! 3!!! SHE’S DONE IT!!!”

“Wowza...Not as bloody as last ‘un, ey darlin’?”

“Waai Fu’s getting medical attention, as is Phantom from the looks...Hey, wait a minute, honey, did you see that?”

“See what?”

--------

Aak was there at Waai Fu’s side, local anesthetic applied and staple gun going to work. “A bit of medi-gel will get this patched up in no time...Hey, who was that guy, anyway? Never seen him around before.”

“The Phantom Behind the Curtain, Treasurer of the Night. He was the leading man for a theatre troupe known for less-than-savory wetwork who traveled the world as a closely-knit ring of assassins, although many didn’t realize their actual business until the day it collapsed.” The Feline sighed. “That one killed a crowded theatre with his voice alone. He didn’t want me dead, not enough to speak to me with his true voice.”

“Truer words, vigilante, have yet to be spoken” a spectral figure whispered in her ear, disappearing before she could identify them.

The other Feline next to her cocked her head. “See something? Mighta gotten some hallucinogens in the anesthetic again.”

“No, it’s...nothing.” She shook her head. “It’ll pass, whatever it was.”

“You’d best win the tournament now, child...For your father’s sake.” From the other ear this time, as if standing in Aak’s place.

On the ground, as Warfarin ensured Gaspard began his recovery, a black cat stepped out of the shadows and, once the Sarkaz was done with the greater part of patching him up, sat on his chest, gently pawing at his face. A slight smile came to his face as he and his Christine were taken to Medical for full evaluation; he might have been defeated in this battle, but the war for himself was far from lost.

[padme-amitabha]

Prequel And George Lucas Appreciation Post

This is an ongoing list of everything I appreciate about the Star Wars Prequels (and by extension the Original Trilogy) and appreciation of George Lucas’ vision and a tribute to Star Wars when it was still about morals and depth because Disney is intent on ruining the franchise and George’s creation. I am only referring to the six original films here and the list is in no particular order.

1. Villains - One thing that Lucas does well is creating great antagonists. Now Darth Vader being a great villain and character is pretty self-explanatory but I love the way his character is handled in the movies. He is presented in three different ways in each film, or that’s how I interpret it anyway.

We see him being an imperial in ANH and a bereaucratic one at that. He is defending the battle station and basically doing his job i.e trying to locate the stolen plans. In ESB, he is suddenly a much bigger threat. He is the epitome of evil which is further enhanced by the stunning visuals. He is the ultimate bad guy who Luke has to defeat to become a Jedi. What we did not expect is the “I am your father” reveal and that Luke is defeated and manages to escape in the end. The Darth Vader in ROTJ is much more subservient and loyal to the Emperor. He obeys the emperor and waits for Luke to show up and is not much of a threat. He is also shown to be very conflicted and tries to convince Luke to join him rather than making Luke join him against his will. The reason I think he’s portrayed differently is because the story is from Luke’s perspective. Yoda and Obi-Wan led Luke to believe Vader is evil and the narrative stays faithful to that. However, when Luke realizes the word of the Jedi cannot fully be trusted, he decides to come to his own conclusion and sees the conflict and good in his father after a brief conversation. Even with the black and white symbolism in the OT, we are introduced to the gray area in ROTJ when it’s revealed Darth Vader is not as evil as he appears to be and the “good” Jedi can just be as manipulative and biased (as acknowledged by Obi-Wan clinging to his own point of view and encouraging a boy to kill/fight his father without even sharing the information with him) - and Lucas continues to explore this in the Prequels.

The Prequels are about the fall of a centuries old noble religious order and how a single man managed to bring an end to democracy. History shows to bring down an established government it must have some structural flaws and as such the Jedi are shown to be just as bureaucratic as the imperials in ANH; the Jedi are portrayed in a negative light. The Jedi had grown arrogant in their abilities and had grown personal loyalties (such as Mace Windu to the Republic) and they were too blind to acknowledge the flaws in their perception. Qui-Gon was an exception to this and he was more compassionate and better Jedi like the knights in the Old Republic and his death in TPM foreshadows the fall of the Jedi order and of the golden era of the Jedi. At the end of the trilogy, Yoda and Obi-Wan are the sole survivors. It proves even the wise and experienced Yoda could be wrong as he confessed to Qui-Gon in ROTS. Obi-Wan was a Jedi who was very loyal to the order and the council and wished to follow the code by the book and still over the years he had grown attached to Anakin and had a strong emotional bond with him which was why he was still alive although deeply affected by the events. Hence, both Yoda and Obi-Wan were forced to acknowledge the weaknesses in their order and as a result grew as characters.

The prequels also demonstrate how the strict and flawed ways of the Jedi drastically changed Anakin’s life and how he struggled to fit in the order but at the same time making a point that the code didn’t change the lives of all the Jedi such as Obi-Wan who was quite content as a Jedi. The contrast shows how the lifestyle affected people like Anakin who were ruled by their emotions, and how it ended up pushing him to the dark side.

Palpatine is another great villain in contrast to Vader because he is anything but conflicted. He is the true epitome of evil and unapologetically so. I have seen very few stories actually pulling this off because a character who’s purely evil tends to be one dimensional or run the risk of coming across as incompetent even though the creator tries to tell us that they are very capable, such as Lord Voldemort from Harry Potter. However, this can be done well if the main focus of the story isn’t on the main villain by minimising their screentime so they still appear a looming threat till the main character(s) defeat them in the end and accomplish something, as done with Fire Lord Ozai from ATLA and Palpatine in OT. Palpatine is a looming, sort of foreign threat in the background who is shown to be purely evil and chaotic and he only appears in the last film. He isn’t defeated by the hero but by his own apprentice who served him for years. Vader is the main villain in OT and of course a great one at that. But the PT establishes that Palpatine is very much an accomplished villain as well. He’s a treacherous Sith Lord who has managed to evade the Jedi at the height of their power by hiding in plain sight. He orchestrates a galactic war by playing both sides and emerges victorious. He turns the clones against their allies and comes to power by latching onto emergency powers, much like Hitler. Even without Anakin/Vader’s help, he’s fairly successful in eradicating an entire order by studying and utilizing their weaknesses.

One of his greatest accomplishments is manipulating Anakin for years and slowly grooming him to be the perfect Sith apprentice. He takes his time to get in his head and establishing trust and knows exactly what to say to win him over, and while he is doing this he isn’t sitting idle. He has other apprentices whom he discards after they serve a purpose. He is ambitious and always scheming and I would say he’s a pretty successful politician too as he had quite a few supporters in the Senate to be elected Supreme Chancellor. He was the ultimate mastermind pulling the strings and manipulating everyone around him even Padmé in TPM.

As others have noted before me, the titles of the prequels have multiple meanings. While Darth Maul is shown to be the Phantom Menace in regards to being a mysterious figure who looks like the devil himself and stalking the main characters, so is Sheev Palpatine and Queen Amidala in the sense neither are who they pretend to be. Padmé’s two identities are obvious in the film while Palpatine’s double identity remains hidden. The Attack of the Clones can also be interpreted as Palpatine vs Sidious as they are the leaders of the both sides and they are referred to as clones as they are identical i.e. the same person. I also love how they incorporated the emperor’s theme from ROTJ into the ending theme in TPM and it’s a subtle reminder that it’s as just as much Palpatine’s victory in being elected chancellor.

I personally don’t mind that Maul was killed off in TPM because even though he lost to Obi-Wan it wasn’t before he killed an accomplished Jedi Knight. He was just as skilled as them and we see the Jedi struggle to keep up even with their strength in numbers. I love the fact that he more like a silent assassin because a lot of villains have a habit of chattering which is often utilised by the heroes to win, and Maul still retained the sense of mystery around him by the end of the film.

It’s pretty well-known that Maul, Dooku and Grievous all foreshadow the rise of Darth Vader, the franchise’s most iconic villain. Maul is a Sith Lord who unquestioningly obeys Sidious, Dooku is a former Jedi who left the order due to ideological differences and also personal ambition and Grievous is part cyborg with a preistent cough (similar to Vader’s wheezing) to make a point that technology is not without limitations and also a reminder of his humanity.

All in all I think Lucas is a genius who has managed to give us pretty amazing and actually proficient villains who could give the heroes a run for their money.

[mysterylover123]

Mysterylover watches Bleach Episodes 140-141

mysterylover123

1. So there’ve been like a billion Bleach analysis vids dropped in the last week. I was curious enough to check them out, but did my best to make sure I skipped past spoilers. That was interesting, especially since they dispelled a bunch of myths about the show (like getting ‘cancelled’ or ‘falling in popularity’), and validated something I’ve kinda begun to suspect: Namely, that Bleach is actually kinda good and most of the  critiques of it are things that are problems with any Shounen. Which is neat. Got me plenty hyped for this episode. 

2. Darnit we’re starting out with Ura’s fight. I’m still mad at you Ura. 

3. Rangi is so fiesty. Kick their asses Rangi! Also: So Hitsu is a full on WaterBender?! Damn that’s cool.

4. Oh Damn back to Ichi vs GJ. Ichi’s gonna get fucked up this time, I just know it. He’s so screwed. Thank god he’s a Shonen protag or I’d be worried he’d be dead. 

5. RUKIA WITH THE RESCUE!!!! YAS!!!! GO RUKIA VS GJ ROUND TWO. And Ruki Ices him up good and quick, then saves Ichi from being all bound. She’s awesome. I kinda have the feeling turning her back on frozen GJ is a bad idea. HE’s gonna pop outta that ice any minute now...

6.th YUP THERE HE GOES. GRabs Ruki’s head and looks like he’s sucking out her energy, only for...something to get in the way? OK who’s here to save Ruki now? (seriously we’ve got such a circle of saving). OK it’s uh...(checks subtitles) Shinji. Blond guy. OK. I guess he’s cool now.

7. So Shinji’s gonna fight GJ instead huh. DAmmit that’s so much more boring than Ruki fighting him. 

8. Wow GJ’s actually scared of Shinji huh? And damn that was a pretty big blast. Hope GJ’s not dead, he’s still a cool villain. LOL and Ichi and Ruki just stand there watching like ‘damn’. 

9. GJ yelling Damn really makes him seem like this show’s Vegeta. Like the badass villain rival whose role is to get his ass kicked all the time and be mad about it.

10. ULQUIORRA?!?! WTF WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU INTERFERING IN THIS FIGHT? not that I’m complaining. I mean more Ulqui is always good. But wow they just left like that. Cause they  already got Orihime so they don’t need to bother with any of these losers I guess.

11. So Arrancars ascend through their light columns while Ulqui thinks judge-y thoughts about Ichi while flashing back to capturing Hime. Cause again, they’ve got her so they win. 

12. OOH Ulqui gave Hime a Phaser/Invisible bracelet huh? She can say goodbye to one person? (I’m going to guess it’ll be Ichigo, though my heart wants it to be Tatsuki). And damn there’s some serious Phantom of the Opera vibes in this sequence, huh? Hey, he is letting her say goodbye and spend 12 hours getting chores ready for everyone. That’s something. Most anime villain kidnappers are not that considerate.

13. Invisible Orihime sequence! And Phasing! Damn it’s like being a ghost. Spooky.  

14. THAT DOOF SAID TATSUKI’S NAME. AND HIME HEARD AND FREKED OUT OMG. SAY GOODBYE TO TASUKI HIME. DO IT DO IT DO IT!!! OMG SAD TATSUHIME MONTAGE. YAS WELCOME BACK TO THE FOLD

15. Tatsuki be looking right at Hime even though Hime’s invisible. That’s some serious soulmates stuff. 

16. Sad Ichigo & Rukia scene next, as of course the minute Hime disappears nobody can heal him right away. Damn they’re gonna lose their white mage healer this arc! Without Hime the squad is gonna be so screwed, they’re  worse than Deku at avoiding getting injured.

17. OOH this guy described his powers as being like a ‘time reversal’. Is that how Hime’s powers work too? DOES SHE HAVE ERI’S POWERS?! (or maybe not since Eri doesn’t talk to fairies).

18. Rukia immediately tries to reassert her position as Hime’s main femslash pairing by worrying about her and ditching the injured Ichigo to go find her. Even though she’s hungry and Ichi’s nice sisters have dinner ready for her. 

19. I like how Ichi’s family has just kinda accepted that Ruki now lives in Ichi’s room. Like, it’s just the way things are.

20. ORIHIME KITTY PRYDES HER WAY THROUGH THE WALL. She’s picking Ichi? darnit. Ah well. OK let’s see whatcha got for Ichi, Hime. She lists all her ships to make sure we know she still remembers them. 

21. She’s sweet about Ichi’s sisters spending the night! And gets embarassed about being in his bedroom. This sequence is so wholesome. (except the “your scent” line wtf hime you been memorizing that?) Anyway, she puts her hand on his. 

22. DON’T KISS HIM WHILE HE’S UNCONSCIOUS HIME!! GUY CAN’T CONSENT IF YOU DO THAT!! Anyway we get a cute IchiHime montage, to make sure we’ve covered all the main Hime shipping bases this episode. And thank god her tears wake him up before she can kiss him unconsciously. 

23. DAMMIT HIME YOU’RE GONNA MAKE ME CRY. She wanted to do all this stuff. Damn she likes sweets huh? oh god she’s gonna make me start bawling. She wants to live 5 lives. “I would have fallen in love with the same person five different times” HOLY SHIT HIME. You are smooth. That’s a hell of a line. 

24. “goodbye halcyon days”.

[duhragonball]

Battle Tendency Liveblog: JJBA Ch. 94-98

This is the first part of the “Joseph vs. Wammu” arc. 

Is it “Whammu” or “Wammu”?    I just looked it up and you drop the “h” I guess.

Here’s some background on the mansion Kars has been using as a base.    I get the impression that it’s a real building in St. Moritz, Switzerland, which leads me to imagine Hirohiko Araki visiting Switzerland in the 80′s and being inspired by the sights.    Then again, I’m not even sure this is a real building.

Messina’s injured and Caesar’s dead, so it’s down to just Joseph and Lisa.  They want to track down Wammu before he heals up from the Caesar fight, but instead they run into some new asshole named “Wired Beck.”   I always assumed he was named after the Beck who did the song “Loser” in the 90′s, but no, it was Jeff Beck, who made the album “Wired”.   This led me to wonder what the other Beck’s first name is, and it turns out that is his first name.  His full name is “Beck David Hansen”. 

It’s been like... 28 days?  Since The Pillar Men spared Joseph in Rome, and while he and Caesar were training, the Pillar Men have also been busy creating vampires with the Stone Mask.  Wired Beck was a fugitive murderer before they got ahold of him. 

Joseph is all set to fight the guy, but Lisa steps in and kills him instead, doing one of those awesome “I killed you so fast that you don’t even know what hit you” attacks.   Joseph is amazed and somewhat surprised by her fighting skills, which I don’t understand because he’s been training under her for three weeks.   Like, Beck didn’t take Lisa seriously either, but he just met the lady, so I get that.  

And when they finally find Wammu, he praises Lisa Lisa for noticing that there’s a lot of other people in the room with them.   But he still adds “-for a woman!” to his assessment.   You’d think a 12,000 year old Pillar Man, who thinks his kind is superior to humans, would rise above this sort of sexism.   Or maybe I’ve got it backwards, and it’s exactly because he’s a 12,000 year old supremacist that Wammu’s attitude is so backward.

Anyway, Kars is here too, and so are like a hundred vampires.   Like Wired Beck, they’re all loyal minions of Kars and Wammu, just hanging off the ceiling and waiting for orders.   Joseph and Lisa could kill a few vampires without any trouble, as we’ve just seen, but this is just too many.   They’re trapped and they know it.   

To Joseph’s credit, he tries to set up a string to trap all of them at once, but there’s too many eyes watching.   Wammu asks Kars to let him fight Joseph one-on-one, but Kars is done with that shit.  He just wants the Red Stone of Aja, and he sees no reason to wait around.   But then Lisa tells him that she has the Stone in a secret location, and if she or Joseph don’t check in with it by a prearranged time, a bomb will go off to destroy it.  It’s a bluff, and Kars knows it’s a bluff, but he’s too obsessed with the Stone to take the risk.  

There’s a lot of shots of Lisa Lisa acting cool in this part of the story, probably because we’re running out of other characters.    I preferred the anime Lisa Lisa to the manga design, because I liked how she looks like the cover art to Duran Duran’s Rio “album”.   Compared to that, the manga Lisa looks a bit... understated.   But I’ve come to appreciate that understated look.   Joseph uses his boisterous personality to help draw attention away from his tricks.    But while he’s making a scene, Lisa Lisa just adopts this stone cold poker face and dares anyone to call her bet.  She knows how badly Kars wants the stone, and she knows that Kars understands how badly she wants to keep it from him.  Why should she be bluffing about this?   Leaving the stone in such a situation sounds like a smart play.   Kars thinks she’s just being desperate, except she doesn’t look desperate, does she?

Lisa proposes a wager to break the standoff: She and Joseph will fight Kars and Wammu for control of the Red Stone of Aja.  Nice and simple.   Kars accepts, not so much because he accepts her bomb story, but because it gives them a chance to avenge Esidisi.    He asks Wammu to chose a battleground, then sends Joseph to fetch the Stone while they keep Lisa as a hostage.

Wammu’s choice is a place called “Skeleton Heel Stone”.   If I understand him correctly, it was something like a Swiss answer to Stonehenge, but later on it became a gladiatorial arena.

Joseph heads back to St. Moritz to get the stone, and carries Messina back with him.  Okay, so about Messina.   Wammu lopped off his arm outside the mansion, but when Caesar entered the mansion to chase after Wammu, he found Messina lying inside, like someone had carried him in.  So how did that happen?  I can only guess Messina brought himself indoors, but that doesn’t sound like something he would do, since he knew the mansion was enemy ground.

Back at the hotel, Joseph finds the Red Stone of Aja in Lisa’s luggage, but he also discovers an old photo from 1889.   There’s Speedwagon, his grandmother Erina Joestar, and... Straizo?   Holding a baby?!    Of course, anyone who knows Phantom Blood knows that this photo represents the all the survivors from the Part 1 cast.   The baby is the same one Erina rescued before Jonathan sank the ship to stop Dio.   But Joseph has no idea about any of that.   He had heard of Straizo before their fight in New York, but he didn’t know much.

Here’s a nice shot of Skeleton Heel Stone.    It’s supposed to be near the foot of Piz Bernina, along the Italian/Swiss border.  

Joseph arrives with the Stone, and holds up a match to it to demonstrate it’s amplification powers.   Satisfied that it’s the genuine article, Kars agrees to proceed with their contest.

In the meantime, Lisa deduces that Joseph saw the photo in her suitcase, and explains that she was the baby in the photo.  Erina saved her from the sinking ship, but since she was pregnant with Joseph’s father, she entrusted Lisa’s care to Straizo.  That’s how she learned the Ripple and came into possession of the Red Stone of Aja.  Joseph is more confused that Lisa looks as young as she does when she must be fifty years old.

And once again, Joseph finds himself empathizing with others.   He had always seen Lisa Lisa as a cold, hardnosed instructor, but now he’s imagining how difficult Straizo’s betrayal must have been for her.  

Never mind that shit!  Here come vampire horses!   Joseph asks the same thing we’re all wondering: What the Fuck?   It’s actually quite simple, really.  To prepare for this event, the Pillar Men used the Stone Masks on some horses.   The vampire goons can barely control them.

What I want to know is where Kars found all these silly Roman soldier uniforms for all of these guys.   Like I said before, it’s been about a month since they woke up in Rome, but I get the feeling that all Kars did was find a new home and dress up his new vampire henchmen in silly clothes.   

The idea is that Wammu will be fighting Joseph in an old-fashioned chariot race, but Joseph thinks the use of vampire horses is an unfair advantage for Wammu.   But they explain that the reins will conduct Hamon, so Joseph should be able to control them with a light Ripple.   O... kay?  Lisa Lisa verifies this, but it still seems kind of goofy.  

Kars orders the battle to begin with the moon appears out of the clouds, but Joseph seems more interested in clearing his chariot wheels.   That makes Lisa nervous, until...

... the race begins and Wammu’s chariot gets stuck.    While everyone else was watching the moon, Joseph was tossing crap in front of Wammu’s chariot to slow him down.   

Look at this big tricky himbo, he’s great.

So the way this works is that there’s a pillar on the racetrack, and there’ll be a weapon hanging from it for the riders to take.   Joseph wants to get a head start so he can have his choice of weapon.    This is because one of them is a big old warhammer, and he’s worried about what Wammu could do with such a thing if he got his hands on it.    However, if Joseph could cover it in oil, he could charge it with Hamon and really give Wammu a hard time.  

And Joseph pulls it off!   He nearly loses his grip on the thing, but it catches on the ring on his finger.   Incidentally, this is the antidote ring that Caesar secured for him earlier.   Joseph has decided that he won’t drink the antidote until he’s beaten Wammu, so he’s wearing it on his pinky instead.   So Joseph seems really confident that all he needs is the warhammer to win this thing.    So why is this (Pillar) man smiling?

[janiedean]

Just seen a post like "y r reylos upset? they kissed. I have a ship where they don't even meet" and I was ready to go "I Don't Know How To Explain To You That knowingly shipping a crackship and seeing a ship that's been set up since the beginning get turned into some emotionally manipulative little trick by hacks who dgaf abt the characters and only want to cash in on every single part of the fandom are very different things." But I gave up. Not worth the effort.

it’s not, but... honestly?

this thing is... like... I don’t want to say mildly worrying me, but... it is. (beware the next post won’t probably make much sense but bear with me this thing isn’t sitting well with me lmao)

I mean, like, let’s get it out of the way that I didn’t care for reylo either way until tlj and post-tlj I was like ‘oh okay they’re definitely the romance of the trilogy fine sounds nice I’ll be here being happy for them when they inevitably kiss’, because it’s like.. star... wars. I mean. sw is like the one franchise that until five days ago I’d have cashed in on being the ONE thing that would always end up cheesy/hopeful/not disappointing you know, so... I didn’t even consider that there was another way it could end. because it’s goddamn sw, redemption stories with happy endings are the damned brand.

so like... the fact that the thing was obviously set up and they tore it to shreds along with everything else in the movie is bad. like, bad. but people who didn’t realize how fucking insulting it was just... don’t seem to get that the moment you go watch movies whose brand is making you feel better about things and they turn into calvinism central NO HAPPINESS ALLOWED and they don’t even do it with sense - bc rots made no fucking sense at any point ever and that’s outside reylo - it just... makes you feel betrayed? like, again: in 2015 when I came out of the cinema the only thing I banked on was poe dameron not dying and I couldn’t care either way about kylo ren, but like - tlj made me care. as it was supposed to be. I was supposed to care about kylo ren’s pull to the light and guess what I did because that movie wanted me to, and it wanted me to do 2+2 and realize that he and rey were soulmates and fine I was down with that because I like myself a nice love story.

and then like... you give it to me, like that, and the moment you have the character who has had a shitty life, has been groomed since he was born if not before by Worst Person In The Galaxy if the new canon wants me to buy that - or by snoke but it’s the same -, is an abuse victim and is 100% sure that everyone hates him and no one understands him or wants to understand him, you make that character related to one of the most iconic ones in the franchise to the point that you tried to make han every other member of the trio tbh, you actually have that character taking his life in his hands after talking to han and like embrace what he always wanted to be and show that he’s actually happy with it (like ffs guys it’s also probs because adam driver is an excellent actor but you can see the ben solo vs kylo ren difference in the span of five seconds, and you’re supposed to root for ben solo to win ffs), have him actually win, have him being happy for the first time in the entire canon and then you kill him a second later with rey in tears over it except that then we forget to give him a funeral........... like.......... sorry but I feel robbed because as lowkey as my effort on banking on ben solo’s redemption was because I was sure it was coming and I took it for granted it still felt like they were being unnecessarily cruel. like, they could have killed him in ten other ways that wouldn’t make you feel like someone stabbed you in the kidney as another anon put it. but no, let’s give people the prospect of HEY THEY’LL BE HAPPY just to tear it away from them ten seconds later. like, what the fuck? that’s not what anyone signed up for.

especially when the entire thing was obviously set up for the happy ending. like, if you actually misread the audience so much that you think star wars audience wants grimdark when it’s a movie marketed at children then you don’t deserve the money you’re most likely getting paid.

like, again: as someone who wasn’t even diehard reylo or whatever even if I absolutely shipped it, I felt like these assholes took my money and punched me in the kidney since rey palpatine was a thing and the moment he died I about screamed fuck you out loud... along with most of the entire room which was screaming fuck you, because guess what, not a single person in that room actually was banking on the ben solo redemption to fail and each single person in the room was clapping when they kissed because we were fucking waiting for it already, and like......... obviously ppl shipping it are upset. they were given an unsatisfactory movie up until then that didn’t give the characters justice but which could have still been more or less decent if it saved the spirit of the entire thing... which it didn’t because sw is not fucking calvinist central and hasn’t ever been until now. and then they were given canon after being the target of the vilest shit (guys seriously I unfollowed antireylo people way before shipping reylo myself bc that crap was out of line for shipping fictional stuff)... just to have them take it away by killing the one character that was there to show you that there’s always hope for you to do the right thing?

like, let’s be fucking real: the message is that if you fucked up and want to be better it won’t ever be enough because sorry but you’ll never get another good start and if you care about someone who fucked up and want to help them be better it’s wasted time because people who want to do better can’t actually live and have a chance to keep on doing it.

and sorry but fuck that message with a chainsaw. the beautiful thing about this ship imvho was that in tlj it made it overtly clear how rey helped him out of being a genuinely nice person who listened to someone who thought no one ever would and at the same time kylo/ben couldn’t believe that someone actually said that he wouldn’t be alone either bc the two of them are extremely lonely people and feel that acutely....... and they even threw in the soul bond to make it extra obvious. it was a hopeful story because you had girl who never had anyone who was also innately good who could put her prejudices aside to see that someone who also went dark side because he thought no one loved him and then kept on being abused his entire life actually had good inside them and wanted to help him see that instead of writing him off as a lost cause. like. that was a good romance. nothing exceedingly new under the sun, but in sw it was pretty fresh and a good spin compared to the two other main love stories of the trilogy. also, anakin/padme was what it was and han/leia was immensely better but hey someone decided to kill off the entire original trio so whatever... and if these two ended well they’d have been a constant improvement, never mind the symbolism - you had anakin who was a no one and married a space princess but ended up tragically because he went to the dark side and she could do nothing for him, then anakin’s daughter who was a space princess and married han who is also technically a no one since he didn’t even have a surname on his home planet, and if rey/ben had actually not.. had that ending you’d have closed the circle with space prince descended from both anakin and leia being brought back from the dark side with the help of another no one and finally the damned skywalker line would have gotten one 100% happy ending because it was supposed to be the ending.

like.

that’s something that thematically made so much sense I didn’t even think they wouldn’t do it.

and they did. and guess what of course people are pissed. because this movie about ignored themes, its own canon (from tfa and tlj) and didn’t accomplish one single thing except chewie getting his damned medal.

which, while something we all hoped would happen at some point, is hardly the one thing you should accomplish in a star wars movie supposed to end the goddamned cycle and which eventually ended up being prequel-level if not worse. because I mean, objectively I think the phantom menace was actually a better movie, and I would rewatch this over 2 and 3 just because the cgi in this movie didn’t hurt my eyes, but as bad as lucas got with the prequels, he never did a single character as dirty as disney did all the characters here. no, not even padme, and he did do padme dirty.

tldr: if people don’t get why you’d be pissed at how this movie ended idk what to tell them... but shit if it’s not worrying me that people apparently can’t get that it was a disaster on each single level it could have been. peace.

[gokinjeespot]

off the rack #1314

Monday. December 28, 2020

 I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas. These few comic books are thanks to the generosity of fellow fan Doug.

 Batman/Catwoman #1 - Tom King (writer) Clay Mann (art) Tomeu Morey (colours) Clayton Cowles (letters). Well surprise, surprise. I really liked this first issue. Someone doubted that I would because I wasn't a fan of Tom King's recent stories but this one I enjoyed immensely and not just because of how Clay draws Selina. My favourite storyline in the Batman run was the relationship between Selina Kyle/Catwoman and Bruce Wayne/ Batman and it still is. I really wanted them to get married. This story jumps back and forth in time and involves Catwoman's complicated relationships with the hero and the villains. I hope I get to finish this new Black Label series.

 Action Comics #1027 - Brian Michael Bendis (writer) John Romita Jr. (pencils) Klaus Janson (inks) Brad Anderson (colours) Dave Sharpe (letters).  The House of Kent story concludes with the Superman Family winning the day and defeating the Red Cloud. Too bad the new owner of the Daily Planet and mastermind behind the Invisible Mafia, Marisol Leone, escapes justice. I hear Brian Michael Bendis is leaving this book and that some fans are happy with that news. As big a Bendis fan as I am I thought this story sucked. Not even better art would have saved it in my opinion. Even the shocking development on the last page was dumb. I hope the next creative team does a better job on this book.

 Iron Man #1 to #4 - Christopher Cantwell (writer) Cafu (art) Frank D'Armata (colours) VC's Joe Caramagna (letters). You can't keep a good Iron Man down. Here I thought Tony Stark was dead. He's back on the racks and teamed up with Patsy Walker/Hellcat in this latest reboot and the first 4 issues were oaky. I stopped reading Iron Man a while back so I don't know who the new A.I. is that he talks to but it goes by B.O.S.S. How he hooks up with Patsy is another mystery to me. Tony has reinvented himself after being resurrected from the dead and he fights a bunch of old foes. His biggest challenge is a new version of Korvac. Remember him? I don't. For straight super hero versus super villains fare, this is okay, middle of the road comics.

 Batman Black and White #1 - James Tynion IV, J. H. Williams III, G. Willow Wilson, Emma Rios and Paul Dini (writers) Tradd Moore, J. H. Williams III, Greg Smallwood, Emma Rios and Andy Kubert (art). I call books like this vanity projects. They're written and illustrated in an artsy fartsy way that is pretentious to me. When it comes to Batman I'm more of a blue collar kind of fan and these stories feel more like they should be in a snooty art gallery. The stories are accompanied by creator bios and I found the first two to be worth reading but I didn't read all of them, kind of like how I stop reading the little plaques at the art gallery that goes with the art on the wall after a few. $5.99 US for four short stories in black and white seems steep to me.

 Batman #103 - James Tynion IV (writer) Guillem March, Carlo Pagulayan  & Danny Miki (art) David Baron (colours) Clayton Cowles (letters). The cover is a blatant bait and switch. It says "Ghost-Maker vs. Clownhunter" but it's really Ghost-Maker vs. Batman as Bruce tries to keep Ghost-Maker from killing Clownhunter. The best part of this issue was Harley Quinn's appearance.

 Batman #104 - James Tynion IV (writer) Guillem March, Bengal, Ryan Benjamin  & Danny Miki (art) David Baron (colours) Clayton Cowles (letters). I like this Ghost-Maker guy. He wears a headband. I wonder if he still wears one under his helmet. So Ghost-Maker sedated Batman, Harley and Clownhunter last issue and now has them tied up in Arkham Asylum. He left Clownhunter unfettered with a sword handy to kill Harley with. Uh-oh.

 Batman #105 - James Tynion IV (writer) Alvaro Martinez  & Christian Duce, Carlo Pagulayan  & Danny Miki (art) David Baron (colours) Clayton Cowles (letters). Does Clownhunter kill Harley? Does Ghost-Maker kill Batman? Read this conclusion to "Ghost Stories" to find out. Get ready to roll your eyes.

 Superman #27 & #28 - Brian Michael Bendis (writer) Ivan Reis (pencils) Danny Miki (inks) Alex Sinclair (colours) Dave Sharpe (letters). The last 2 parts of "Mythological" where Superman fights Synmar came to a grinding, groaning stop. This is the type of story that helps explain why some people get turned off super hero comics. It's just a bunch of big punch-'em-ups and then the good guy wins in the end. And can we get a consistent depiction of the Phantom Zone please? Is it a dimension where the bad guys are phantoms existing in null space or just another dimension where the bad guys live basically like they used to, like in this story? I hate when creators change things to suit their plots. I don't blame fans for grumbling about Bendis after reading this multi-parter.

 Detective Comics #1030 - Peter J. Tomasi (writer) Bilquis Evely (art) Mat Lopes (colours) Rob Leigh (letters). Rob Leigh (letters). The grassroots movement to rid Gotham City of masked vigilantes doesn't make me care for the Bat Family more because it sure feels like a contrived plot device. The plotline that I'm much more interested in is Damian's poking around his dad's old case files. That's the kind of detective work I like.

 Detective Comics #1031 - Peter J. Tomasi (writer) Bilquis Evely (art) Mat Lopes (colours) Rob Leigh (letters). Rob Leigh (letters). This issue is reflective of events that happened during the recent US presidential election. Anti-Bat and pro-Bat supporters clash and only in comic books can Batman defuse the volatile situation with a noble speech. Meanwhile, Damian quickly finds the person guilty of sweeping the cold cases of the attacks on Bruce Wayne in the past under the rug and brings them to justice. The perp's real identity offers a clue to the villain who shows up at the end of this issue.

 Detective Comics #1032 - Peter J. Tomasi (writer) Brad Walker (pencils) Andrew Hennessy (inks) Dave McCaig (colours) Rob Leigh (letters). Father and son set aside their feud to save the rest of the Bat Family from the latest super villain that has them in his clutches. No mystery who the bad guy is with the cover for this issue being a ginormous spoiler. Yes, Hush is back and he's got a great new scheme to hurt Batman.

 Superman Special #1 - Andy Lanning & Ron Marz (writers) Phil Hester & Ande Parks (art) Hi-Fi (colours) Dave Sharpe (letters). Flashback sequence Marco Santucci (art) Arif Prianto (colours) A Larger World's Troy Peteri (letters). This is part 3 of "Endless Winter" which is DC's version of the finale of the Game of Thrones TV show. It's pretty straight forward. The heroes fight giant ice creatures. The end. I wouldn't spend money on this rack filler.