#or some that i just read a lot of fanfic for

[fuckyeahmhawkefenris]

It is unbearably quiet on tumblr lately, and what little talking there is, it's all about the next game. Yeah, we're no longer in 2012, I get it.

I'll just keep entertaining myself however I can.

I've always wanted to talk about one fic I secretly refer to as one of the hidden gems in the fenhawke archives. I have never ever seen anyone bring it up, and in all these years I've never dared to recommend it to anyone... Don't think you can even find it so easily? For good reason tbh...

Thing is, it's a fill for da kink community on livejournal. Anyone remember that place? The safe haven where anyone could anonimously submit the kinkiest most shameless things you could think of - offering prompts, filling them... Those were some desperate times when we were painfully low on content, and it was very hard to find something to read. Finding a story with characterization that suited your vision was near impossible!

I myself was desprate enough to brave through countless pages of imageries I could not stomach, skimming through them just to get the general idea until something captured my attention.

So I found this, and honestly, to this day to me it is one of the best examples of... idk, not just good characterization, but the overall feeling of the fenhawke relationship, why I can't let go of them after 12 years? It's all subjective, of course, but no fanfic ever resonated with me as deeply as this. Also back then mage Hawke was not very popular and most stories featured rogues... I used to be very sad and lonely!

Warning: it's extremely triggery. I wouldn't even recommend reading the first part at all, because it's too difficult and painful to get through. Hell, I couldn't read it! I was looking through the text very VERY briefly to get only the most basic and vague understanding of what was happening, and it was still hard! There is a lot of abuse, rape, slavery things...

To get the idea:

The Alone quest did not get resolved as planned. Danarius managed to win that battle, captured Fenris and returned to Tevinter, gravely injuring Hawke in the process (Fenris thought he was killed). To break the remains of his will, Danarius threatens to erase Fenris's memories of Hawke, and he succumbs and stops resisting altogether. I don't want to recall the details, but it was awful. Go straight to part 17 (it's a flashback) to read a very lovely take on fenhawke first night together. It's super sweet and gentle, though painfully sad in context. Still, beautiful. Well, it gets worse before it gets better! Somewhere in part 19 Fenris's friends come for him (they sailed all the way here on Isabela's new ship) and he's rescued. What follows is an exceptionally touching tender reunion with Hawke. Oh, and then, once all is settled comes the second part - All the King's men, which is much less controversial and fairly easy to read. Fenris copes with his experiences, and Hawke is always there for him. There are some truly fantastic moments as they slowly get close to each other again! Isabela is pretty great here, and Anders... sorta made me warm up to his character? And it's all fairly believable and close to how we see them in the game.

I'm saying all this and linking this fic on the off chance that someone with tastes similar to mine ever needs something like it. I know I am grateful it exists, and still hold it very dear to my heart. Definitely never regretted finding it!

[nerdieforpedro]

20 Questions of Writers 📑

I was tagged by @frenchiereading @avastrasposts and @maggiemayhemnj (Bless the three of you. You know a dissertation is coming 🤣🤣🤣) 💜

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

I have 81 works on AO3. There are some that are there and not on Tumblr yet. As to why, some of them are other series I haven’t finished or I’m not sure if I should post them here.

2. What is your total AO3 word count?

As of today: 351,908 words (updated for a new chapter of one of my works)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently: Pedro Pascal, Oscar Issac, Garrett Hedlund and might dabble in Call of Duty (maybe)

No longer writing: Marvel

4. Top Five fics by kudos: (some of these were written long ago, when Nerdie was a wee one in fandom)

Sard’ika Sessions (the most in kudos and hits- it tells me ya’ll like Din being a soft dom and using several different tools, maybe at the same time?)

Our Journey Across the Star Ocean (people enjoy the way I write Din maybe?)

The Viper Longs for Foliage (the one fic I have about Oberyn Martell - I don’t feel I write him well but people feel differently I suppose 🤔)

The Best and the Worst Day (AO3 only - Chris Evans fix it was a phase 🫣)

I want him to see me (AO3 only - I had to look up what this was lol Sebastian Stan fic)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes! I make sure to go through my inbox to reply to anyone who was nice enough to leave me one. ☺️

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Bold of you to assume I finish fics regularly 👀

Scarlet Stains and their Echoes Such angst with a Backstreet Boys joke thrown in. 😆

7. What is the fic you wrote that has the happiest ending?

This is a three way tie (cheating because Nerdie is not above it) between Sard’ika Sessions, The Lake Between Us and Parts of you Mr. Morales. Each fic has a different Pedro character - Din, Ezra (I had to give him something happy 😭) and Frankie.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not that I’ve seen. I totally thought I would and that’s why something stay on AO3 or in the WIP folder but so far I have not. It’s like waiting for the other shoe to drop.

9. Do you write smut?

I used to. I used to write a lot and enjoyed it. I find now that when I write smut it’s awkward and takes me at least a month to finish a smut scene because despite watching and reading reference materials (porn and other awesome smut fanfic here and on AO3) I don’t have the same mojo when writing it any more. I feel a bit sad about it, but there’s nothing that’s worked. It’s not like I don’t have thots. I just can’t get them in a fic. 😭😭

10. Craziest Crossover?

I haven’t really done many. One m/m fic where Din and Poe crossed blasters (pun fully intended), one sandwich with a female reader, Lucian Flores and Benny Miller, My Tim Rockford series where Dieter is his brother and that’s about it I think 🧐

11. Have you ever have a fic stolen? Not that I know of. So happy I’m in my small weird little box 📦

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Not that I know of.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic? Nope I would be open to it but I dunno how the process would work.

14. All time favorite ship? The Razor Crest, it has room for passengers. 😆

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Such heart ache 😣 My first series that I started was with Dave York (he was done so dirty dammit!) and it was pretty smut filled. Felt with him and the OFC’s messed up dynamic as well but because of all the smut and how I can’t seem to write smut to save my neck now, it will likely go unfinished. 😭

16. What are your writing strengths?

Honestly, I’m not sure. Maybe just the weird plot ideas I can make and dialogue. That’s about it.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Finishing a fic, SMUT, weak comedy (I can’t resist it though), fixating on small details that don’t matter and everything that wasn’t listed as a strength. What is writing really? Can I make the words go together? 😨

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

Pretty cool, just make sure you ask a native speaker in that language to look over things before posting. I have found that some of my Spanish is too literal and no native Spanish speaker is actually going to say that. Plus each language always has little nuances you need to take into account.

19. First Fandom you wrote in? Marvel 👀 Look it was a phase dammit! 🫣 Leave me alone. 😭

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Nerdie will cheat again, because this is her post! 😆 I enjoy all my fics. Otherwise, why would I write them? But one stands above the rest. It gives me all the feels, giggles, some funny banter, smut that took a damn month to write and inspired @soft-persephone to tag me in a meme that @boliv-jenta made, Weddings 101 with Dieter.

If there’s one fic that I feel has the majority of my writing (all styles and facets) in it, Weddings 101 would be it. My humor, agnst, attempt at making a villain and sub-plots, slow burn romance with a goat as Dieter’s ride or die. 🤗 That trash panda gave me a lot so I wrote him a wild ass series. 😋

NPT: @tinytinymenace @megamindsecretlair @perotovar @pedroshotwifey @lady-bess

@djarinmuse @alltheglitterandtheroar @inept-the-magnificent @lotusbxtch

@jeewrites @rosecentaur1916 @westside-rot @jessthebaker @trulybetty

@rhoorl @musings-of-a-rose @saturn-rings-writes @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @magpiepills

@secretelephanttattoo @morallyinept @goodwithcheese

[appleblueberry-pie]

How did you get into fan fiction?

I began reading it one day. I remember I searched up my comfort character online, and a wattpad "x reader" fanfiction with them in it popped up, and I clicked it, and now here I am. Lol.

It was my high school senior quote, but at some point you have to stop consuming and begin creating. And as much as I loved reading fanfictions, I wanted to try it out. It was literally so bad, like I can't stress enough how bad the fanfictions were. My first attempt flopped and I took it down😭.

My SECOND one.....I worked on that for about 4 years. I got about half a million readers and then wattpad took the entire thing away. I was lowkey sick of writing just pure smut on it anyways. That's what the entire thing was. Just my favorite characters being fucked and that's it. The longest fic I've written was in that book, which was around 5.2k words and I haven't topped it since.

Anyways. I took a break writing fanfictions after that was taken down and shifted to AO3, where the first half of that popular book still remains. No, I won't tell what it is. I got obsessed with the site and ran through it entirely. Seriously. Everytime i tried to search for more content on there, all of the fucking titles would be grey bc ive already READ IT. ☠️ I LOOOOOOOOVED AO3 but it's literally dead. At least the fandom I was looking into was dead on that site. Very, very sad.

I felt neglected at that point and heard tumblr was good even tho i thought it was like a dating site. It's not, obviously. The first time I tried being on here, the theme and construction of the site really overwhelmed me, so I thought I still wouldn't like it. But that was 2 years ago, and now I'm writing about my favs on here, too.

Funny thing is, I shifted from smut to just pure yandere filth.

But the real thing that got me to write on HERE is that a looooot of people are on this site, and a lot of people post super often. I love being involved in communities like that. I also write on here because I felt the yandere community wasn't being represented correctly. I've been a big ass fan of yandere content since 2020. And I felt like if I shouted with my artistic language from the rooftops, people that deserve to have what they're missing in the content they read would find it in my works. The only yandere fanfics I find on here are rape and manipulation fanfics. There's a spectrum of yandere tendencies, and I try to show the whole lining to you guys.

But I wouldn't be able to do all of this without the influence others have put on me. All of these writers are way more than I'm saying on this post rn, and I couldn't be what I wanted to be known as if it wasn't for them.

[helluva-simper]

Alastor HC!!!

So, I’ve seen a lot of (when I say a lot I mean I’ve read like 3 and got this idea) Alastor x Nightmare! Reader fanfic and here are my thoughts. When I think of someone asking Alastor if he has nightmares he’d say something like, “Oh, heavens, no! If anything I cause them.” because he so preppy. (Gonna make a headcanon one where this is a lie but let’s not get into that.) But! If Y/n was to have a nightmare, he would honestly make it worse. LET ME EXPLAIN! Alastor isn’t some softy the fandom has made into. He is a cruel, prideful, selfish piece of crap. One of Hell’s brutalest overlords. Killed over MILLIONS. And I feel like you're gonna know a little more about him than most would. But let’s say the night you have a nightmare is the night you two get into a fight. If you are like me, you’re gonna say some crappy stuff. Obviously Alastor will do so too but he’ll be hecka scary about it.                                                         (Example #1) The sound of bone cracking, skin ripping, and a wendigo screaming could be heard as you watch him morph into his demonic form. Oh, crap. You couldn’t even blink in before Alastor grabs you by the hair digging his nails into your scalp. “WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!” He asked as black tencoles snake around your limbs and mouth.

The tencoles at your limbs yank away making you feel like they would just rip right off. The tencole around your mouth muffled your screams which kinda disappointed Alastor but he had to do what he had to do to make sure he didn’t get the attention of unwanted guests. 

This wasn’t your loving boyfriend anymore. No. This was THE Radio Demon. The heartless, fearsome, merciless overlord, Alastor. 

Suddenly, you were slammed to the ground breaking your nose. Oh, God. You barely could get any air into your lungs since blood was blocking air and a tencole around your mouth prevented you from a lot of things. You feel a foot step on your back continuing to add pressure till he breaks a rib. You let out another muffled cry as the tencoles, now at your sides, struggled. Alastor chuckles at your pitiful state. 

He leans down to your ear. “If you EVER say something like that again, I’ll kill you. Understood?” You nodded quickly before the tencoles retreated. You gasped for air as he walked out the room. 

                                                               (End)

So nice of him, right? But seriously this is what I think he would do if you and him ever got into a fight and it affected his pride or something. Gonna make a comfort for this too :)

[desultory-novice]

Sir Uther walks up to Noir Fontaine with purpose, having his usual happy-go-lucky smile and perky attitude. It was a surprise to see yet another human in this tournament ...well, atleast human-like. He instinctively reaches out for a handshake, eyes locked on Noir's face.

"Are you human?! MY~! I only ever saw the other one named Jade! Unlike her, you seem to be named after a color in french! Do tell, are there still any left of your species? Or are you all nearly extinct? Do you also have a history with Dark Matter in particular? I have so many questions~!! ☆"

His crystal eyes twinkle in delight, this truly was an opportunity to gain so much useful knowledge!

"Oh! And that entity, Zero as well! Does she exist in your world?"

"Hi! Wow! You're big! Bigger than I thought you round guys got!" 

Noir greets you with a boyish smile, though... ...He does not accept the handshake.

"You look like one of those Galactic Soldier Alliance people! I wrote fanfic about you! I can't let you read it because it's really cringe, but that's only cause when I was young I dreamed of being a hero, so...if you're ever recruiting, let me know maybe?! I'm not all that strong... but I'm passionate and have a strong sense of justice and somehow, I've got a lot of experience handling situations where all the evidence you killed anyone is gone because their bodies just disperse into matter once they're dead enough and the snow hides all the blood!"

[cw: mild body horror below]

"...What was I saying? Oh, yeah! I'm human! Whoa, there's another human here too? I should've figured that out, huh? I feel like I've been in a daze since I got here (or maybe even longer than that) and have been having a really hard time paying attention to stuff till lately when it all started coming back into my head REALLY FAST!"

"?! Do you speak French?! My mom taught my sister and me a little French and Japanese, cause of our ancestry, (what's my dad? I don't know! Maybe he's French-Japanese too?!) though we mostly speak Global at home. My name's supposed to be in Global but it's pretty cool that it means something in French too. 'Dark.' Sometimes I wonder if I was named after my hair? Though my sister's is the same color, pretty much, so that couldn't be it. Probably a coincidence?"

"Speaking of, my sister's human too and she's still around! We're separated right now, but my little brother's with her! (He's Dark Matter, since you brought it up! Yeah, he's adopted, but he's my little brother and if anyone says anything mean about him, I'll ****** them!) They're surrounded by friends too, so I don't worry!"

"It was really hard to get off the planet last time I was there, and it was getting pre~tty cold and people who got left outside tended to disappear till next year when you could find them again thawing out on the road but it's hard to imagine we've just gone extinct! I mean, the people from the New World had to have gone somewhere!"

"Hmm? Z...e...?"

"...r...." "...o...!?"

"M-muh...M-Mas..." "...pl...ea... ey...e...c-can....t... "...bre...athe...."

-

Noir clutches his throat. The dark, burn-like cracks on his skin that had been easy to ignore till now seem to crawl up, to his chin and beyond. A thick metal collar around his neck, barely visible between his gloved hands, hums with a dark violet glow before he passes out.

Elsewhere, an otherwise unremarkable looking sword in the stolen stash of a small Dark Matter begins to vibrate, seeking its host.

@kirbyoctournament

PS: Wisp belongs to @moonsharkss and while he's still in the lead this round, it's close, so if you want to give him a vote...!

(Help I forgot his hands!)

-

Noir's Field Trip Masterpost

-

AN: Welp, add another one to Sir Uther's body count/list of crimes...

So, I still have some "Cheerful" (...although more like his brains have been scrambled) Noir asks to answer/send out that I'll get to when I have time (writing him is a bit exhausting tbh... ) but I have gone ahead and drawn this to "progress" back to the main tourney story! (You didn't think he could stay this way forever, did you?)

TLDR, We're back to regular Noir (...or whatever other AU hijinks happen to come his way that affect him in some manner?! Magic anons...???) but if you wished to interact with or send another question to Noir explicitly during his short lived cheerful phase, lemme know! Though whether I get to it will depend on how I'm feeling ^^

-

(...Fwiw, I'm pretty sure if he stayed this way for too long, the emotional cascade would eventually give him a full on mental breakdown as his refreshed, innocent psyche finally catches up with processing all the traumas that made up his life.)

[gillianthecat]

10 Characters, 10 Fandoms, 10 Tags

thanks @technitango for the tag!

Fighter: Why R U?

Nozue: Old Fashion Cupcake

Talia: Arrows of the Queen

Pete: KinnPorsche the Series

Egwene Al'Vere: Wheel of Time

Sig: Love In the Air

Jeong SeonAh: The Devil Judge

Anyanwu: Wild Seed (Octavia Butler's Patternist series)

Kent Parson: Check, Please!

Hyeong Da-woon: Blueming

10 tags: @bellarkeandclintashaandsuch @carol-holloway @halfmoon-trueself @heretherebedork @lelephantsnail @moonchildridden @negrowhat @placetneplacet @seekingidlewild @veemark

no pressure, of course! only if it's fun for you!

[shouldersshrug]

some of yall need to infantilize sam less. im all for different viewpoints on characters but sometimes it’s just downright disrespectful. “haha sam thinks chocolate milk comes from brown cows” that is a grown man who smokes weed and has a computer science nerd for a best friend

[pepperpixel]

+ Butch 4 Butch +

(Except neither one of them is rlly that butch but holy fUCKING SHIT THAT SONG IS LITERALLY THEM… the version of them I made up in my mind palace… it’s them.)

Anywayyyy. Yeah! Have a tagr art dump..! aka, those vibes when you, out of a series of moments of temporary insanity, end up finding, taking in, nursing back to health and eventually falling into a tangled messy yearning situationship w the asshole tsundere alien who tried to destroy your entire planet… rlly extremely relatable vibes!!

[dreagine]

Aroace ink sans I love you…………….

[ganondoodle]

utterly random late night panic thoughts but

if you read my zelda comic and like it i love and appreciate you but i really do need to be upfront about it being very much a self indulgent enemies to lovers story with a villain at the center that has done bad but isnt bad at his core and is struggeling to come to terms with the fact that he doesnt actually want to be the evil beast he and almost everyone else believes he should be

yes im one of those people ... fake villain fans or something ... i think .. i dont know the rules to that ... q-q

[cluescorner]

I cannot imagine being a Damian stan right now. You've got both Zdarsky's bullshit (where he clearly doesn't give a shit about your boy) and The Boy Wonder (where Juni Ba clearly gives so many shits about your boy) coming out on the same day. The whiplash must be insane. I hope y'all get some nice warm soup for your efforts jfc

[vivika-ka]

every time i look back on steve and billy’s fight, i can’t understand people who straight up will talk about it like billy was planning a murder. he was willing to get his sister back home and be done with it. that would’ve been the end of it. was he pissed? yeah, rightfully so. his little sister sneaks out and it’s doing god knows what in a new environment she and their family knows shit about. [i’m not even getting into the scene with neil because plenty of people have, and they are certainly more coherent than i am lol]

an 18-year-old lies to billy about where his little sister is and when confronted about the lie, responds with an insult (“were you dropped as a child” comment). steve offers no explanation as to why his sister is there, and has the audacity to expect that billy will just, what, leave his little sister with strangers? respond with “aw shucks, i guess you know better, harrington. you know my little sister already, even though she is a middle schooler and we’ve been in this town for a week…i suppose it’s normal for a person your age to be around 13-year-olds who aren’t related to you. i’ll just leave you to it.”

[i wonder if people who vilify billy in this moment have siblings. because if you think leaving a sibling behind in a clearly shady situation would’ve been reasonable and ok…i’m concerned for your siblings lmao i’m sorry but i am]

but anyway. the point of the post is: when it gets to the climax of the fight, he has the upper hand after being on equal footing (because hey, steve punched him first, remember? steve is not a saint in this situation, and many people [antis most of the time] talk about this fight as if steve wasn’t throwing punches).

i don’t know if anyone has ever been in a fight, i unfortunately have been in a handful, i have been where steve is, and let me tell you, this doesn’t look like someone who enjoys having the upper hand. dacre could’ve very well acted this part with billy’s ah ha ha ha laughter, maybe a hint of smug satisfaction, maybe continuous taunting.

but he didn’t for a reason. billy isn’t enjoying any of this. in this supposed triumphant moment for billy, anguish overcomes anger. this isn’t what he wanted. he didn’t go to the byers’ house looking for and planning a fight, he was looking for his god damn little sister.

i just…idk. dacre puts out this complex performance in a matter of seconds, accomplished the definition of “show don’t tell.” but i guess the audience needed to be told. (although, they love to ignore neil’s scenes. so at this point it’s just plain denial).

[celestie0]

when ppl get too caught up in the accuracy of situations in fanfiction or if things are super realistic or as they should/would be in real life etc etc im like. my tumblr user in christ. it's fanfiction.

[obsob]

will u still make hp content in the future ☹️ i loved ur wolfstar / marauders specifically i reblog the invisibility cloak drawing periodically

mm probably not no!! i think it is absolutely possible to maintain a relationship w/ 'problematic' content, but i think such relationships are better done privately. when u are creating fan-work for Dodgy Content, some of the people engaging with it are fully aware of the dodginess and are exercising good and fun critical thinking, some totally are oblivious to the issues and some just dont care - and the tricky thing is you very often cant tell which group someone falls into on a quick glance. whenever i see someone still drawing hp fanart i nearly always block them on sight because of this, and i dont really want to be part of it :) just too messy!

[flecks-of-stardust]

wholeheartedly and with as much gentleness as possible, i truly think there needs to be more discussion about downpour in the community as it is now. for a variety of reasons.

[caligvlasaqvarivm]

Thoughts on humanstuck!Eridan? I'd imagine hes somewhat better adjusted considering. yknow. the lack of Murder and Gov't Mandated Racism. but if his dad was Dualscar or something he'd probably still have some Issues™.

SO many of Eridan's issues are tied up with Alternian society, specifically, that he's basically gonna wind up in OC-with-a-canon-skin territory in any situation where that pressure is removed. I'm not really the person to go to for that kind of thing; I'm a frothing-at-the-mouth canon purist 😂

No shade at all on the people who do like to mess around with AUs and the like, it's just not what I'm into. Even the meta fact that he's the Society Troll is significant to his character and place within the story and themes, so asking me to speculate about him when the Society aspect is removed is really not my boathouse, sorry.