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HAHA FUCK YES! YES!!
FOR REFERENCE, THIS IS MADE FROM THIS STILL IMAGE
#original#it's just vertical oscillation based on the vertical position!#it's not scrolling vertically at all that's an optical illusion#the bottom of the image is peeking out from the top and vice/versa at times but it's just wobbling up and down#not actually scrolling like in the previous video#this is so fucked up and cool!#this is exactly what i wanted to achieve!#it's oscillating the vertical position at just the right rate to make it look like the Things are splitting in two and it's SO COOL!#to notice how it's not actually scrolling: watch the red-ish colored bar in the bottom left. it never goes past the bottom of the screen
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Shatabhisha- Stuck in a loop!?⭕️
Ruled by Rahu and situated in a sign governed by Saturn, Shatabhisha Nakshatra intertwines the themes of Rahu and Saturn.
Rahu represents obsession, addiction, perfectionism, illusion, desires, and the material world. Saturn, on the other hand, symbolizes restriction, ambition, delays, and discipline. This nakshatra is intriguing to observe because Saturn is often seen as the only planet capable of controlling and restricting Rahu. Addiction is a recurring theme for those heavily influenced by Shatabhisha Nakshatra.
Rahu, symbolizing the insatiable head/mouth, constantly seeks satisfaction. People with strong Shatabhisha influence may struggle with feeling perpetually unfulfilled.
The main symbol of Shatabhisha is an empty closed circle, representing restriction, karma, and limits. ⭕️
This reminds me of a snake eating its own tail, a metaphor for self-destruction often seen in these natives. They may feel stuck in a loop, constantly desiring more than they have, feel, or can access. This symbol illustrates their urge to break free from patterns and limitations.
Shatabhisha also embodies the power to heal, represented by the 100 physicians and healers. Individuals influenced by this nakshatra often have a strong desire for self-improvement, healing, and spiritual growth. They are driven to push boundaries and explore their limits, often oscillating between extremes—addiction to unhealthy behaviors or a "perfect" lifestyle.
Lewis Hamilton is an excellent example of someone who effectively harnesses the energy of Shatabisha. His ascendant lord, Venus, is in Shatabhisha, conjunct his Mars in the 5th house. His Rahu is in Krittika of Taurus, with Venus as the dispositor. Lewis follows a plant-based diet and is very strict with his fitness regimen, as even a small weight gain can affect his racing performance.
This year, he launched a non-alcoholic Blue Agave Spirit, Almave, produced in Mexico.🥃
Krittika, associated with the deity Agni, the god of fire, governs cooking, drinks, and digestion. Agni has the power to burn/purify, reflecting his disciplined approach to diet and lifestyle.🔥
Another example, she’s Shatabhisha Moon.
Another example that comes to mind is Emily Blunt, who has her Sun in Shatabhisha, fittingly playing a role in “Edge of Tomorrow” that mirrors the themes of this nakshatra, as well.
In the film, her character, Sergeant Rita Vrataski, helps Major William Cage (Tom Cruise) break free from a time loop by repeatedly facing and overcoming challenges. Rita’s journey in the movie reflects the Shatabhisha themes of perseverance, healing and ultimately, breaking the cycle to achieve a greater purpose.
Dealing with Rahu's influence can lead to excess, a desire to experience, feel everything or nothing.
However, understanding one's restrictions and seeing the bigger picture can bring freedom. Recognizing and accepting personal limitations allows one to channel obsessive desires into sustaining something meaningful in the material world.
By acknowledging and respecting these restrictions, individuals can transform Rahu's chaotic energy into focused ambition and disciplined action, leading to significant achievements and personal growth.
#astrology notes#vedic astro observations#vedic astro notes#astrology#vedic astrology#astro notes#shatabhisha#rahu
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Mezzo - 11 - Gravity
Pairing: mshenko | Rating: M
Tags: Canon-typical violence, trauma, dealing with your problems poorly, body autonomy struggles
Summary: The twists and turns of ME2, through the eyes of everyone but Commander Shepard.
Chapter Summary: The aftermath.
Chapter 10: Gravity | Read on Ao3
12 December 2185, Shadow Sea, Iera System, Horizon, Kodiak 9755, Normandy SR-2 Approach
The Kodiak lifts off with a jerk that Miranda feels in her gut. Shepard stands rather than sits, gripping a handle hanging from the ceiling tight in his fist, eyes gazing out the shutter as Horizon disappears beneath them.
“Shepard,” she says quietly.
“EDI,” Shepard says into the comm before she can say another word. “I need that ship. Do we know where it was headed?”
“I was unable to extrapolate likely destinations based on relay vector. However, it is likely they are returning through the Omega 4.”
“Can we catch them before they get there?”
“Negative.”
Shepard slams his fist against the bulkhead. It leaves a dent.
“We can use the data from EDI’s scans—” Miranda begins, but Shepard cuts her off.
“What was Project Overlord?”
She stutters. “I—”
“What was Project Overlord?”
“Shepard, I don’t know. But I will find out.”
He holds her gaze before striding out of the hold in favor of the cockpit.
Silence reigns.
“Solus, if you don’t shut down these oscillators I’m going to rip them off,” Jack speaks up eventually.
“Certainly.”
A few keystrokes to his omnitool later, the gravity well shifts, that heavy, cold feeling evaporating. Grunt groans in relief. Miranda stares at her hands.
“You knew Shepard’s former crew was down there,” she says aloud, directing her attention to Vakarian.
“Alenko, yeah,” he admits. “Shepard didn’t say anything about the others. I…don’t think he knew.”
Her fists curl into her lap. The Illusive Man told Shepard, but didn’t tell me. Shepard had told Vakarian but hadn’t seen it necessary to inform his second in command. How can I do my job if I am perpetually left in the dark?
Shepard reappears moments later, eyes on Grunt. “As soon as we dock, take those salvaged weapons to Taylor. I want to know everything about them.”
“The more we know, the better we kill,” Grunt declares, smashing his fist against the arm rest. It buckles.
Shepard paces the compartment with an almost frantic, nervous energy, rattling off his orders like he’s afraid of the space between the words. “Solus, I want a personal debrief on the seeker swarm countermeasure in two hours.”
“Countermeasure effective, but hoping data collected during mission will provide insight for improving efficacy while minimizing side effects.”
“Thank fuck,” Jack says, eyeing Shepard warily. The gravity well ripples as she twirls dark energy in her fingers.
Shepard grits his teeth. “I need to know if we learned anything about their physiology. Technology. Communication. Get whoever you need to go through the data. I want answers.”
“Understood.”
“Lawson, I need a better plan than ‘figure out the Omega 4.’ I need a damned target. I’m not playing cat and mouse with these assholes.”
Read from the beginning | Read the rest on Ao3 | The Mezzo Playlist
#mass effect#mshenko#kaidan alenko#otp: after all this time#mezzo update#it's been 98263874642785 years#i hope it's worth it#this chapter means a lot to me#it was very hard#and i am very proud of it
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my ghosts within
In the midst of what seems mundane lies a hidden world
Ghosts surround me, accompanying my every step
The lost, the unmet, the real, the imagined
These translucent entities haunt and console me
Wispy figments shift in and out of awareness
Subdued whispers, their presence felt but never seen
What may seem ordinary masks profound challenges
I push aside my ghosts who yearn to be acknowledged
Fragile mind oscillates betwixt clarity and confusion
A perpetual struggle to live in the present
The universe is littered with daily reminders
of what once was…
of what could have been…
of what I have lost…
of what was never mine…
of what will never be…
Every hushed whisper, every reverberating echo
My ghosts represent these fragments of my narrative
An incomplete history of distortions and illusions
Leaves me feeling incomplete
So, who am I?
What may often be overlooked carries significance to me
Unanswered questions ignite chaos within my mind
I navigate an unsolvable labyrinth of mystery
External investigations cannot unveil these buried truths
Healing lies in reconciling with my ghosts within
Dialogue with them holds the key to my liberation,
Clearing away the misty fog that clouds my perception
By forgiving the past and accepting the unknown,
I can release my ghosts from my internal world
Empowered, I can forge my own narrative,
Finally discovering who I am
#poetry#poem#writing#poems#thoughts#self discovery#identity#who am i#life lessons#words of wisdom#writerscreed#writingthestorm#poeticstories#smittenbypoetry#poets#original poetry#original writing#words to live by#finding yourself#prose#poetic#self love#deep thoughts#internalearthquake#therapy#acceptance#forgiveness#love#spilled poetry#spilled words
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You know, because it's hard to give a massive amount of character in one post, I'm gonna list stuff about alternate rusted knights here
Repentant Thief: Emerald Sustrai, desperate for company used her semblance to hallucinate her friends/allies. Over time as her memory of them began failing, the illusions became flatter, more generic in their kindness and support, and at some points she truly believes that's what RWBY and Co. were like, while at others she can't stand the sight of them, the inaccuracies making her sick to her stomach.
She waits for her Heroes. The ones that saved her before.
She wears leather armor with a Leather helm that covers the lower portion of her face, with a large cloak and hood over all of it. her pants are very similar to previoupairs, simply plainer and sturdier. She has traded heels in for full hiking boots.
~~~~~
Fathomless Angler: Clover Ebi, now an old man, has grown tired, very, very tired. So tired he no longer cares to find a way out, and lets time slip by - He never read The Girl that fell Through the World, his knowledge of it's tale being minimal. He figures this is some twisted afterlife, that he'd done wrong fighting Qrow and has to let himself be punished for fighting his friend.
He Waits, as catching a fish is mostly waiting for it to take the bait. He's still trying to figure out his fish.
Clover wears a faded, dusty Atlesian coat, meant to have water and snow slide right off, with a large scarf and slick bucket hat. due to lack of care, his beard has grown long and scraggly, a veritable bush of salt and pepper. He wears Waders in place of his old Military boots.
~~~~~
The Cobalt Knight (Oxidized Cobalt): Alyx, upon deciding to amend her mistakes in the Ever After was assaulted by The Curious Cat. Jaune Arc, the Rusted Knight, still sick from the poison rushed to her aid. In the end, Alyx was saved, and the cat slinked away to lick it's wounds.
Jaune's didn't make it, and was swallowed by the tree.
Alyx, unable to heal him, to fix this mistake took up his weapons and trained. She was smart - out maneuvering and outsmarting the cat for years until she was able to fight it directly. Then they stayed apart, the Cat not wanting to risk themself, and Alyx not wanting to her own life in revenge.
Alyx waits for the same reasons Jaune did - Guilt, anger, self-loathing, and a need to help RWBY, with all the same weapons he fought with; Mind, Sword, and Shield.
She wears armor like Jaune's only simpler, and lighter, and in FAR better condition - only a little dirty and scuffed.
~~~~~
The Frosted Empress (Lonely): Weiss Schnee, Knowing all she had to do was wait, did just that. She waited. and Waited. And waited. She did her best to stay stable, she practiced arts, she kept up her training, she began to speak to herself in off moments, she never got along with people too much liker herself so Alyx was a handful to deal with.
She oscillates between a very sweet, matronly figure, and an Icy, bitchy Vol-1-esque personality, with moments of lucidity being not too uncommon.
This Weiss wears very simply constructed outfits - basic chain mail and dresses, with immense ornamentation, and a veil, like one would wear at a funeral. She has many different trinkets - leaves, feathers, jewelry and what not.
~~~~~
The Wilted Rose: Ruby Rose fell into the Ever After, and Suffered. She fought as much as she always had, but with no support, no clear goal and the weight of her failings crushing her, Alyx and Lewis were the Straws that broke the Camel's back.
She Ascended into the one person she knew could do anything.
Summer rose.
As motherly and sweet as ever, this rose has thorns only for The Curious Cat - even if she can't remember why.
She looks like an older Summer. With like, very graying hair. It's just Summer Rose.
#rwby#ruby rose#weiss schnee#alyx rwby#rwby alyx#clover ebi#emerald sustrai#alternative rusted knight#rwby au
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。゚・The Bold Mendacity – 𝟓. First friend
✦⸼࣪⸳ 𝐆.𝐈 𝐕𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 (𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐜) 𝐱 𝐆𝐍!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 <3
✦⸼࣪⸳ 𝐖𝐜: 2,6k
✦⸼࣪⸳ 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆!!: Mentions of drowning and almost death.
✦⸼࣪⸳𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐨: ♡
✦⸼࣪⸳ A/N: Hii! I hope you guys enjoy this fluffy chapter. And yes this is the longest one until now because I definitely wanted to give you all some happiness 😊 /hj
Your lungs ached as if they were burning from the inside, which was ironic because the only thing leaving them was water. Being able to breathe freely was liberating. The worst part of drowning wasn't "dying", but the pain of breathing water.
"H-Hm... do you want me to call someone?" The blond boy tried to help you, patting you lightly on the back. Nothing came of it, but the intention had been good.
"N-No..."
You decided to stay lying down, the pain in your body oscillating between mild and sharp stabs. The horrible sensation of wet clothes sticking to your body and a gigantic tiredness made you close your eyes once more, only to open them again with a strong jolt.
"D-Don't die, please!" The boy looked a little desperate, thinking that your final moments were happening right in front of him.
"I won't die... I think."
With his help, you carefully sat up. The boy seemed very kind and had probably been the one to save you, which was strange as you remembered sinking into an abyss. In any case, it would have been impolite not to thank him.
"Did you help me? Thank you."
"It was...no big deal, the lake is shallow." he pointed to the body of water next to you. It was so shallow that the deepest part would probably reach an adult's shoulders.
'How did I drown in such a stupid thing?'
Your perplexed gaze stared into the lake. Your jaw dropped at the revelation that you had sunk into a lake less than two meters deep. Was it all just an illusion and you had just fainted because of the water? Well, something certainly wasn't right about that.
"Well, I should introduce myself..." You gave him a nice smile and extended a hand towards him so that he could shake your hand. "I'm [Name]."
He shook your hand carefully, as if you were made of glass. He really didn't want to end up hurting you somehow.
"My name is Freminet..."
For the first time, his lips curved upwards into a calm smile. You finally knew his name.
"Why did you run when I saw you inside?"
"I was embarrassed, I thought you'd come to talk to me and I wouldn't know how to answer... you know... I'm sorry." His smile closed, replaced by an embarrassed face and a lot of fidgeting with his fingers. Freminet was clearly embarrassed, but he didn't want to admit it like that.
"No, no, no, no," shaking your hands and head rapidly in denial, you contradicted him. "I'm the one who should apologize, I made you sad... and now you're all wet and might get sick."
You had to find a way to take the blame off him. It wasn't nice to see someone shy like him blaming himself for things that weren't in his control, especially someone as young as him. It brought back memories of dark times when you were afraid to show up for the crowds during festivals.
"You should smile more and act like you really like it. Do you think people would love a 'Child of Prophecy' who can't even grace them with their presence?" Your former nanny pointed a finger at your face, a slightly annoyed expression on her face.
"I-I'm sorry-"
"If you were really sorry, you'd do better at your job."
You really liked that nanny, she ended up dying trying to protect you from the charges when they took you to court. So why were you questioning her attitudes now? Maybe it was the ungrateful part of you speaking a little louder.
"All right... oh, wait..." His eyes slightly widened. Freminet quickly reached into his pockets and started pulling out various mechanical parts.
"What are these? And how can so much fit into such a small pocket?"
The parts were soaked, they would most likely have to be discarded as they would rust due to the state they were in. They consisted of a few screws, chains and even a thin copper wire.
"They're my mending equipment. Mom always brings nice things when she gets home from work, but they're always broken..."
"So you fix them." You looked at him with a proud look, hoping you'd got it right.
"Yes... but I never know where they'll end up."
A calm wind blew over you. Even though it was warm, it made you both shiver because of being soaked from head to toe.
An awkward silence hung in the air after Freminet's reply, neither of you had anything to talk about at the moment. His hands carried those little pieces, which he stared at. Taking advantage of the silence, you stopped to think about everything that had just happened.
'I need to find something, but what? I couldn't hear anything in the end. Besides, what was that place? It was the center of Fontaine, but a little different from how I remember it, even if I didn't leave the temple much... Nine years have passed since I died, so I'm sure what I saw was in the present.'
Something even more disturbing was troubling you. When you were near the fountain, your reflection was no longer your own. What did that mean? You had never seen that child before in your entire life.
'That wasn't me. What kind of connection do I have with that person? Why did that place show me like her? How did she manipulate Hydro without a vision? Why-'
You were interrupted by a hand on your shoulder. Freminet was pulling another of his trinkets out of his pocket.
"You're sad, aren't you?"
"A little..." your hands hugged your knees, helping you feel a little warmer. "But what's that?"
You pointed to the object in his hands, which he placed closer to you. It was like a little machine in the shape of a dog. It was cute, but it was a bit wet and would probably need to be in the sun for a while before it would turn on.
"It's... something I fixed recently. I didn't give it a name."
He put the little machine down, pressing a button to test it. The puppy took three steps before falling to the side and turning off.
"It's broken." You looked pityingly at the object's failure, wondering if Freminet would be hurt by it.
However, Freminet just picked it up and gave it a few light slaps before turning it on again. This time, the puppy was able to walk forward by moving its mechanical paws.
"Can we..." He turned red with embarrassment and turned his head away. "Can we be... friends?"
"Oh."
You blinked twice when you heard his question. No one had ever asked you that before, absolutely never. Was that how people formed friendships? Wasn't it too direct? But for some reason, you couldn't help but smile.
"Of course!" You grabbed one of his hands and looked at him with starry eyes "Now I'm your new friend, [Name], and you're my first friend!"
Maybe it wouldn't hurt to be friends with someone your own age. It wasn't as if Freminet had the power to condemn you to death or anything. A friendship was something you'd never had before, so you were excited to form one with Freminet.
"So as a gift of friendship, I'll give you this." He placed the puppy in the palm of your hand.
"For me, really?! Thank you!" You hugged him tightly, basically throwing yourself on top of the poor thing, who was unresponsive and then very embarrassed.
"You're welcome... it's a... gift from a friend."
You smiled at each other. Was it so strange to make friends with a child you'd only met a few minutes ago? Well, they say children are quick with that sort of thing.
It didn't last long, because when you realized what you'd done, you quickly separated in a way that didn't look like you were running away from him. Mentally, you couldn't help wishing that you would grow up soon. These habits that your mind had created, because it was that of a child, ended up putting you in many situations that were normal for children, yet shameful.
'Damn childish impulses.'
"You could give him a name."
A name... a few ideas crossed your mind. One in particular was very tempting, maybe it would work.
"Then I'll name it Furina."
"Fu...rina?" He looked at you with a confused face. This was not a name commonly used, nor even allowed in the nation of Fontaine, as it was disrespectful to the name of the Archon. "Isn't that... isn't that forbidden? They say we can't name animals like that."
"Yes, but you won't tell anyone. Right, Freminet?"
He looked like a sad puppy begging for more snacks. It was the first law you'd broken in your life, apart from the ideological falsehood that decorated your criminal record in the past, since you were supposedly "impersonating the child of the prophecy".
"I'm not going." Freminet scratched the back of his head. He didn't look like a child who liked lying to others or hiding secrets. "But why did you choose that name?"
'Damn, I forgot to think of an excuse-'
"Well, it's because I really admire Lady Furina. I want to honor her in this way!" Your hands fiddled with the little mechanisms of the robotic animal.
"But are you sure you want to leave it to me? I'm not very good at looking after pets."
Your eyes met his. You needed to make sure it was really yours before you did whatever you wanted with it.
"Mhm... Mom always brings new trinkets, so I can always make more. She comes to pick up food from time to time, but this time she didn't want to leave me home alone."
He really seemed to know what he was doing, maybe one day you could ask him to fix your closet door that has come apart. Since Clorinde wasn't very good at this sort of thing, a loose screw turned into a dismantled door.
"Isn't it strange to walk around with that?" It just slipped out of your mouth without thinking, and then the consequences came.
'Oops...'
He seemed to be a little hurt by what you said. His eyes glistened a little with unshed tears. He was a bit offended by the statement but didn't want to speak.
"T-That's not what I meant." You waved your arms in front of him, trying to clear up the misunderstanding. "I've never seen anything like that before..."
Your bad habit of saying things without thinking every now and then was something you urgently needed to fix.
"Will you pardon me? I'm really sorry..."
He shook his head and wiped his eyes with his hands. His clothes were almost dry, which was good, as it would prevent him from catching a cold.
You looked out at the lake again. But this time a wave of nausea hit you as soon as your eyes came into contact with it. Your head turned quickly in another direction, as if you were running away from it.
'Hm... I don't think I'm going to want to go near it any time soon.'
"Are you coming back to visit me more often, Freminet?" You fiddled with the present once more, caressing the robotic pet's head.
"I don't know, this is the first time I've come..."
His face paled completely. His eyes widened and he stood up instantly.
"I-I split up with Mom. She must be worried."
He looked at you with those glassy eyes, as if asking for help. This was the time to repay him for what he had done for you.
"Don't worry, I know the way back to where she is. Come with me!" You held out a hand to him, which he held while you guided him. His mother must probably be desperately looking for her missing son.
"I shouldn't have gone away from her... I'm seven years old now, but I still give mom a hard time like this."
Freminet was almost in tears. With his head down and his voice weak, he felt very guilty for worrying his mother.
"Oh, you're the same age as me then. I turned seven a while ago."
"Hm? You're only seven? Then why do you talk like an adult?"
You froze, was it really that obvious? Sister Dora and Clorinde never commented on it, although Clorinde was a mature child in her own right.
"I-I don't talk like an adult! I'm quite a child, you know!" You stuck your tongue out at him in the hope of disguising your behavior.
You walked for a while until you finally reached Freminet's mother, a pretty woman with blonde hair like his, who was in a corner being consoled by other women. She seemed very shaken by his disappearance, using a tissue to wipe away her tears.
"I should have paid more attention to him. I-"
Her eyes finally stopped on the two of you. The woman got up and ran over to Freminet, hugging him tightly as if she didn't want to lose him again.
"Freminet! You scared your poor mother. Where were you? Are you hurt?!"
She put a hand on his cheek, her face a faint smile of relief.
'Hm...' You stood in the corner, watching the scene unfold before you. Could this be how Sister Dora felt when you disappeared into the temple?
"Sorry... I got distracted and wandered off, but I made a friend." He looked at you, causing his mother to turn her head in your direction too. She was a little embarrassed to be seen like this by one of her son's friends.
"I'm sorry, I didn't see you there." She smiled gently at you and wiped her tearstained face with her handkerchief, trying to look more presentable. "It's nice to meet you, hm...?"
"[Name], just [Name]."
"[Name]... It suits you. Thank you for being Freminet's friend..."
She got up and took the monthly food offered by the temple. She seemed to be getting ready to leave, after everything that had happened. Freminet's mother whispered something in his ear, which seemed to put him off a little.
"We'll have to leave now, say goodbye to your friend."
She patted his head, pushing him slightly forward. Freminet didn't seem happy about having to leave.
"Goodbye, [Name]. Don't forget me... please."
"I won't, don't worry."
You hugged him one last time before he left. The scene was seen by the women who were with his mother earlier and by some of the temple volunteers, and would surely have reached the ears of Clorinde or Sister Dora. And so you waved goodbye to him, while watching through the window their silhouettes moving away as the sun set.
Passing through the corridors, you decided to go back to your room to finally rest after everything that had happened. Freminet's gift in your hands reflected the sunlight that hit it.
For some reason, as you walked, you felt the urge to cough. The only thing that came out of your incessant coughing was... water. And that's how you realized:
You couldn't breathe anymore.
Along with this, a strong dizziness caused you to lean on a nearby pillar. And with the agonizing pain in your lungs returning, you fell to the ground.
Your eyes frantically searched for anyone around, finding no one. Despair seized your veins as oxygen failed to reach you.
At the end of the corridor, a figure hidden by shadow gave you the shivers. As if you were facing the somber face of death itself again.
'How many times will I have to die in the same day, damn you!-'
You were cut short out of your thoughts by that voice again. The same voice you heard when that monochromatic Fontaine collapsed.
"˙ƃuıʞɔıʇ sı ʞɔoןɔ ǝɥ⊥"
#fontaine#genshin fontaine#genshin impact#genshin platonic#genshin x reader#freminet x reader#freminet x you#genshin x you#genshin x gender neutral reader#The Bold Mendacity
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Birdie Lusch (1903–1988) was a self-taught artist who worked for most of her life at an assembly line in a ball-bearing factory in Columbus, Ohio, and made art out of found materials and repurposed household articles such as fruit crates and potato sacks. The selection of her paintings, sculptures, and collages shown recently at Kerry Schuss was of uneven quality: some works appeared simplistic or overwrought and others sophisticated and clear-eyed.
The collages (all untitled and all but one ca. 1977) were among the latter. Made on Hallmark Cards sales catalogue pages, they are variations on a single theme: one, two, or occasionally three vases with flowers against a white background. The vases and blossoms are composed of magazine clippings, while the tabletops on which the vases stand are indicated by marker scribbles. In some pieces, several lines of printed text and a Hallmark logo are visible behind the imagery, and a rectangular frame that once held a card sample now resembles a picture or window in the back of the depicted space.
Despite the limited means, the collages have a remarkable spatial complexity, with the push and pull between the drawn lines, printed text, and colorful cutout shapes producing Cubist-like visual oscillations—an illusion of depth momentarily opening up and collapsing again. Fragments of the original imagery cropping up in the cutout pieces strengthen or disrupt the figuration. In one image the vase is fashioned out of a black-and-white photograph showing three gazelles frozen in place against the night sky; their long necks and legs create a rhythmic pattern that seems to twist around the vase’s rotund body. In the same work, images of a tomato, a pillow, and a bowl of rice are deftly employed as red and white blossoms. There is a strong modernist impulse in the collages: the methodical exploration of slight variations in a predetermined format, combined with the mundane subject matter, demonstrates the artist’s deep engagement with the mechanics of pictorial organization. But the main attraction of these works lies in their fine balance between a rigorous, experimental attitude and an easy playfulness and humor in the artist’s handling of found imagery.
https://www.artnews.com/.../aia-reviews/birdie-lusch-62429/
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Interesting Papers for Week 30, 2023
Adult-born neurons inhibit developmentally-born neurons during spatial learning. Ash, A. M., Regele-Blasco, E., Seib, D. R., Chahley, E., Skelton, P. D., Luikart, B. W., & Snyder, J. S. (2023). Neurobiology of Learning and Memory, 198, 107710.
Behavioral origin of sound-evoked activity in mouse visual cortex. Bimbard, C., Sit, T. P. H., Lebedeva, A., Reddy, C. B., Harris, K. D., & Carandini, M. (2023). Nature Neuroscience, 26(2), 251–258.
Exploration patterns shape cognitive map learning. Brunec, I. K., Nantais, M. M., Sutton, J. E., Epstein, R. A., & Newcombe, N. S. (2023). Cognition, 233, 105360.
Distinct contributions of ventral CA1/amygdala co-activation to the induction and maintenance of synaptic plasticity. Chong, Y. S., Wong, L.-W., Gaunt, J., Lee, Y. J., Goh, C. S., Morris, R. G. M., … Sajikumar, S. (2023). Cerebral Cortex, 33(3), 676–690.
An intrinsic oscillator underlies visual navigation in ants. Clement, L., Schwarz, S., & Wystrach, A. (2023). Current Biology, 33(3), 411-422.e5.
Not so optimal: The evolution of mutual information in potassium voltage-gated channels. Duran-Urriago, A., & Marzen, S. (2023). PLOS ONE, 18(2), e0264424.
Successor-like representation guides the prediction of future events in human visual cortex and hippocampus. Ekman, M., Kusch, S., & de Lange, F. P. (2023). eLife, 12, e78904.
Residual dynamics resolves recurrent contributions to neural computation. Galgali, A. R., Sahani, M., & Mante, V. (2023). Nature Neuroscience, 26(2), 326–338.
Dorsal attention network activity during perceptual organization is distinct in schizophrenia and predictive of cognitive disorganization. Keane, B. P., Krekelberg, B., Mill, R. D., Silverstein, S. M., Thompson, J. L., Serody, M. R., … Cole, M. W. (2023). European Journal of Neuroscience, 57(3), 458–478.
A striatal circuit balances learned fear in the presence and absence of sensory cues. Kintscher, M., Kochubey, O., & Schneggenburger, R. (2023). eLife, 12, e75703.
Hippocampal engram networks for fear memory recruit new synapses and modify pre-existing synapses in vivo. Lee, C., Lee, B. H., Jung, H., Lee, C., Sung, Y., Kim, H., … Kaang, B.-K. (2023). Current Biology, 33(3), 507-516.e3.
Neocortical synaptic engrams for remote contextual memories. Lee, J.-H., Kim, W. Bin, Park, E. H., & Cho, J.-H. (2023). Nature Neuroscience, 26(2), 259–273.
The effect of temporal expectation on the correlations of frontal neural activity with alpha oscillation and sensory-motor latency. Lee, J. (2023). Scientific Reports, 13, 2012.
Describing movement learning using metric learning. Loriette, A., Liu, W., Bevilacqua, F., & Caramiaux, B. (2023). PLOS ONE, 18(2), e0272509.
The geometry of cortical representations of touch in rodents. Nogueira, R., Rodgers, C. C., Bruno, R. M., & Fusi, S. (2023). Nature Neuroscience, 26(2), 239–250.
Contextual and pure time coding for self and other in the hippocampus. Omer, D. B., Las, L., & Ulanovsky, N. (2023). Nature Neuroscience, 26(2), 285–294.
Reshaping the full body illusion through visuo-electro-tactile sensations. Preatoni, G., Dell’Eva, F., Valle, G., Pedrocchi, A., & Raspopovic, S. (2023). PLOS ONE, 18(2), e0280628.
Experiencing sweet taste is associated with an increase in prosocial behavior. Schaefer, M., Kühnel, A., Schweitzer, F., Rumpel, F., & Gärtner, M. (2023). Scientific Reports, 13, 1954.
Cortical encoding of rhythmic kinematic structures in biological motion. Shen, L., Lu, X., Yuan, X., Hu, R., Wang, Y., & Jiang, Y. (2023). NeuroImage, 268, 119893.
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#science#Neuroscience#computational neuroscience#Brain science#research#cognition#neurons#cognitive science#neural networks#neural computation#neurobiology#psychophysics#scientific publications
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I saw a video these days about jujutsu and I saw something that I never realized that Megumi is not a good person because he is willing to do anything for his sister, which makes him selfish and that he only saves those who he "deems" to be a good person and who qualify as a good person for him. his morality is very black and white just like geto. There's a line from him that is very realistic, especially today in the manga, that sorcerers are not heroes, an example saturo gojo.
Just Megumi dodging these harsh allegations.
You mean Megumi Fushiguro, son of Toji Fushiguro Satoru Gojo?? Character alignment wise, I oscillate between considering Megumi a True Neutral or more of a Lawful Neutral where "Lawful" is being applied generously.
Megumi is incredibly principled. The baseline for his evaluation of a person is distilled down to an observation that "I won't kill you so, in return, you shouldn't kill me." In a lookback at his days before Jujutsu High, we see that he is more than comfortable beating the brakes off of people who violate this basic tenet, even if they don't infringe upon it with him directly. Despite the rule as he lectures the delinquents, his application of it is very in line with Geto's ideology that the strong should protect the weak and keep the strong in check.
Geto considered all non-sorcerers to be weak against curses thus it was sorcerers' responsibilities to mind the herd. Megumi is a bit more discerning which is a reflection of his strength and perceived weakness compared to his peers. It also factors the flaws and inherent ability to be evil into his consideration. What set Geto astray was the fact that, as the strongest, he couldn't fathom the weak to be a threat. Based on Megumi's actions, those that deserve protection, like Tsumiki and Yuji, are those who are selfless and act on others' behalfs even to their own detriment. So, doing anything for Tsumiki, not even his blood relative, is a reflection of her purity of character. He's not one to cause harm to innocent people but does consider past harm as damnable offenses (like the truck driver who struck a kid in the juvenile detention center... who may or may not have been the driver who killed Rika Orimoto).
I think the big difference here is the fact that... Geto was a part of "The Strongest". Megumi is not. While he was great against non-powered up delinquents, people within jujutsu society remark that he's not good at hand to hand combat. Further, at this point in the anime, we now see that Megumi, at any indication that a fight was going poorly, either had a death wish or didn't see a way out that didn't involve summoning Mahoraga... even against Todo. EVEN AGAINST HARUTA. One could argue his morality is less to do with the idea of omnipotence as was the case with Geto and more to do with the fact that... he's not out here trying to die for someone who will later cause more harm to the world than he can cause good.
It's true, Megumi is aware that sorcerers are not heroes. In fact, he probably thinks those who are foolhardy and believing that they're helping people are especially laughable. Consider the fact that Megumi Fushiguro is a person who was bought and sold... twice... by sorcerers. He's got no choice in the matter as to the path he's on but he's got a tempered sense of reality that is informed by the fact that sorcerers die all the time, students and adults alike. He's just trying to make it out alive and with as much autonomy as he can and that informs an illusion of choice as to who is worth potentially dying for.
While his ideals definitely seem like they could lead him down a similar path to Geto, I think his motivation informed by a sense of self-preservation that he's willing to forego on principle differs greatly from Geto's perception that no harm would ever come to him at all. Geto experienced a foundational upset that altered his brain chemistry but Megumi is aware of his own weakness all the while and will still choose to fight. Please also remember the whole reason he even agreed to go with Gojo in the first place was to make sure Tsumiki wouldn't have a shitty life. He blindly chose a life fraught with peril so she wouldn't suffer at the hands of the Zenin. He, a child, essentially agreed to indentured servitude to protect her because, alone, he could not fend for her.
RE: Gojo as a hero... I am not so foolish as to say he is, but I am not uninformed to say he isn't either. He is simply flawed. Both in essence as a character and in the execution of his ideals. But consider the fact that, as The Strongest:
Gojo doesn't have to bend to the will of the elders that he disagrees with, he could simply kill them.
Gojo doesn't have to take missions just as Yuki Tsukumo refuses, he could let others continue to die in vain.
Gojo doesn't have to stick his neck out for Megumi, Yuta or Yuji, what matter are they to him when he has godlike strength?
None of the above would make him a villain to simply.. not participate in the rigamarole of jujutsu society because, with his strength, it's not like anyone could force him to. Doing the above also doesn't make him a hero; however, knowing that he could just go off and do whatever but he chooses the path of great resistance to cultivate abilities in others so as to better prepare them to be sorcerers and, as much as he can, protect them from the burden of their responsibilities. He's earnestly trying to improve facets of jujutsu society that he doesn't necessarily have to suffer because it's the right thing to do and it benefits kids who come up after him. In comparison to what he could be doing, he's trying to make a difference so the world doesn't lose another person like Geto to the reality of what it means to be a sorcerer.
In a broader sense, Gojo also meets the literal requirements of a hero as a literary device as he is a legendary figure seemingly born of divine descent and endowed with great strength and ability. This is just offset by him being canonically grating to like... everyone around him but Geto and just, generally, a silly, goofy lil guy 🤪✨
#neon asks#anon asks#manga with me#manga with me jjk#we are the strongest#megumi fushiguro#fushiguro megumi#megumi zenin#zenin megumi#geto suguru#suguru geto#gojo satoru#satoru gojo#fushiguro tsumiki#tsumiki fushiguro#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#anime#manga#character analysis#jjk meta#jjk analysis#character alignment
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Glad you found that AU idea fascinating! Its probably my most well developed conceptually even if the plot structure is a mess XD Also slight correction it should have been Six-Teen Heroes cos pun.
The team is: Dragon - Kagami Tiger - Juleka Snake - Luka Horse - Nino Bee - Chloe Fox - Lila
Marinette will eventually get the Mouse, but Mullo divided themselves into several thousand when escaping Scarlet Sovereign (Gabriel) and took awhile to both come back together & pick a user.
There's some noted shifts in some of the powers because of both the changed circumstances & adapted world building/story needs.
Horse can do solo teleports, not just portals. Mouse can duplicate itself or multiply other things. Tiger is more like manufacturing an explosion via chemical reaction. Dragon is mostly the same, but it can channel lesser attacks through the sword. Snake is literal, you only get 1 second chance not infinite, but you also get excellent premonition. Bee can 'subjugate' objects, essentially imbuing them with magic that lets Chloe command & direct them. Turtle can make its wearer vastly more durable rather than just shields & also create a wider variety of protections and traps. Fox is a bit iffy, I keep oscillating on either it being able to tap into people's minds to make mirages, or to super charge illusions and make them real.
Also users can utilize their powers several times (Barring Second Chance) if they do more small scale versions of them. But doing so reduces their overall energy pool, meaning they may not be able to do a full power version.
For example:
Bee can sting five enemies for one minute, or one enemy for five minutes, or command objects more easily than it can bind living foe, ETC.
Horse can single person teleport and depending of mix of distance can do this many times, but long distances or too many & they become unable to open a portal.
NOTES:
Some other factors I like for the AU:
The Kwmai while not malevolent do have their own morals, ideals or goals not totally aligned with Fu's. Though all want to free their family. This informs some of their choices.
Tomoe Tsurugi has the butterfly and is opposed to Gabriel but is not on the Heroes side, if anything she wants to take them over or take their Miraculous. This is also why Kagami is in Paris early.
Lila was picked cos she's good at spinning lies at the drop of a hat & Trixx is amused. But Trixx also primarily uses the truth to manipulate people & is trying to basically trick Lila into genuine heroism.
There's a much stronger focus on trying to reduce civilian causalities in this AU as there is no Miracle Cure available. So the team tends to be divided up into the main fighters & emergency evacuation/defense.
Scarlet Sovereign mostly uses what he calls Charm Constructs at first & later upgrades to "Shikigami". The former involve using a charm to transform a mundane objects into an automaton, while the latter is basically creating a quasi magic 'spirit' to fight for him.
Debating Audrey having the Peacock and doing her own thing with a fixed version, or otherwise being a problem too, but not sure.
One theme I want to explore is how secret identity and powers affects behavior.
Like Chloe as Queen Bee is much more responsible and respectable, but this does not bleed over into her civilian life for awhile. Or how Juleka feels so confident as Tigress she gives up on pursuing Rose as herself & tries to do so as a hero exclusively. Or how Nino is not above utilizing the Horse for more childish or selfish ends, but also sort of questions if power corrupts, ETC.
All of them have identity, self esteem, trauma or behavioral issues is what I am getting at XD
Oh dope!
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im so impressionable that i oscillate between opinions faster than the human eye can perceive, creating an optical illusion of stable, highly informed values formed over a lifetime of introspection
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Summary:
The brush of Oliver’s sun-bleached fringe tickles his midsection, and the livewire tremor that shoots up Elio’s thighs makes his own mouth fall slack; the lump in his tinder-dry throat so pronounced it’s a chore to overcome it. There are so many things he wants to say. Promises and declarations he’s wholly unqualified to voice; especially when all he has to offer is himself. If not later, when, yes, but Oliver’s intense focus sees him oscillating between god and tribute: worshipped and worshipper.
Mounted on the wall in Elio’s summer bedroom is a framed, antique postcard of Monet’s berm. A six by four, run-of-the-mill keepsake that Maynard - his father’s post-grad intern of two years prior - fished out of a Parisian flea market before mailing on a whim. The tranquil scene dates back to 1905 - near as they can tell from the perforated postage stamp - and while the sepia-toned inscription has faded with time, the image on the front remains an accurate depiction of his secret spot.
The place he used to come to immerse himself in the daring, comic book adventures of Diabolik, or the universal themes of love, loss, and mortality selected from his parents’ library.
The place he’s all but convinced he magicked Oliver to life.
Like sentinels, tall, marine pines surround the hidden copse, their branches providing crucial shelter for the finches and sparrows that flit among the crimson poppies. The sky above is equally divine - azure and cloudless where it skirts the mountain pass - while to the east, a twin-hulled fishing boat trawls the secluded cove; its lone pescatore the sole exception to their blessed illusion of privacy.
In short, it’s exquisite, and as slightly-chapped lips form a decadent seal around the head of his leaking cock, Elio can’t help envisioning this raw, pornographic snapshot in all its Impressionist glory, also. Hung on proud display beside the great man’s Water Lilies, perhaps? A study of light and shadow to rival La Femme à la Robe Verte, herself.
The luckiest kid in the world, Oliver called him once, and indeed, the toe-curling decadence of being taken to the root does something to his crowded ribcage.
Finds him longing to remain in this halcyon afternoon forever.
The brush of Oliver’s sun-bleached fringe tickles his midsection, and the livewire tremor that shoots up Elio’s thighs makes his own mouth fall slack; the lump in his tinder-dry throat so pronounced it’s a chore to overcome it. There are so many things he wants to say. Promises and declarations he’s wholly unqualified to voice; especially when all he has to offer is himself. If not later, when, yes, but Oliver’s intense focus sees him oscillating between god and tribute: worshipped and worshipper.
Schmaltzy, perhaps, but no less true. This isn’t just lust. Some animal desire for completion. It lingers between them: that unspoken understanding. Soothing the nerves that twist his butterfly stomach. Oliver’s devotion - his care - his everything, really, flows through him like the cresting waves below, so Elio can be forgiven for hoarding his confessions as a dragon would gold: utterly distracted by the coaxing pattern of flicks and half-circles that unravel him entirely.
For melting into the dual sensations of too-much and not enough.
For gasping and moaning and honest to God whimpering as the other man plays his body like a magnum opus on the Bösendorfer’s ivory keys.
Oliver’s eyes are closed, he realises. Dark lashes skimming the rosy hue of his cheeks; though be it from exertion or arousal he can’t quite determine. Damp with sweat, blond hair sticks to his temple as he bobs his head methodically, and when Elio cranks up on his elbows to get a better angle, the slow-burn in his abdomen has his knuckles blanching white; an unequivocal harbinger of his barrelling orgasm.
As if on cue, the familiar warmth of Oliver’s palm cradles his drawn-tight scrotum; the pad of a questing finger sliding further to his saliva-slick rim. Elio shivers - biting his star of David when it nudges inside - and with a muffled cry he digs his heels into the grassy bank; electrified limbs seeking purchase when Oliver doubles his expert machinations. Darting his tongue out to trace the prominent vein on the underside of his shaft. Gathering the pearls of excitement as he drives him exorbitantly to the edge.
Taking him apart like he was born for it.
Like they were born for each other.
“Sono vicino," Elio warns, spine arching as that cornflower gaze leaves him feeling seen - recognised - like never before.
His hips buck amidst the swirling strokes: a steady pressure applied perfectly. Lungs heaving, he writhes beneath Oliver’s munificence. Or maybe Oliver writhes with him? Either way, it’s instinctive - a blatant challenge - and Elio comes like it’s being torn out of him. Staring blindly. Garbling out a collection of sounds barely ascribable to any specific language, then begging under his feverish breaths that you’ll kill me if you stop.
Unsurprisingly - yet most deservedly - Oliver’s smirking when he floats back down to earth: Elio can feel it in the graze of teeth against his thigh.
Knows he’s smirking, too, even as he sucks in deep gulps of air; replaying the moment on repeat like a scratched vinyl record.
“Your turn,” he chokes out hoarsely when his heart regains a healthy rhythm, and Oliver’s giddy laughter is lost to a groan when Elio kisses a thousand sonnets over the flushed bronze skin of his torso; green bathing suit tossed who-knows-where as he stokes the embers of need into a towering inferno: white-hot and consuming.
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Taylor Swift: Venus (Love × Relationship) Reading
Aquarius Venus in the 2nd House @ 1 Degree (Aries Degree)
Parallel Saturn and Neptune
Taylor's Aquarius Venus in the 2nd House, starkly standing at 1 degree with the fierce energy of Aries, paints a tumultuous landscape. It's like a storm brewing on the horizon, unpredictable and captivating, yet undeniably foreboding. 1 degree in Aquarius indicates instability, intense sensuality, and numerous but short-lived romantic affairs.
From early childhood, this placement suggests a continuous internal battle. An Aquarius Venus seeks freedom, unconventional love, and above all, rebellion against the norms. But when anchored in the 2nd House, it becomes chained to a relentless need for material security and a stable sense of self-worth. Imagine a young Taylor, forever caught in the tension of wanting to break free and fly, yet always feeling the weight of an anchor, pulling her down.
The parallel aspects with Saturn and Neptune only intensify this struggle. Saturn, known as the strict teacher of the zodiac, in parallel with her Venus, speaks of severe lessons in love and value. It points to cold, hard truths she's had to face, times when affection felt more like a cage than a comfort. Relationships, instead of being sources of joy, might have often felt like relentless tests or even burdens.
Neptune’s influence, while dreamy, also casts a deceptive haze over her Venus. It's the siren's call, the mirage in a desert. With Neptune in the mix, Taylor could have often found herself ensnared in illusions, lost in a labyrinth of deceit and false promises. It hints at heartbreaks born out of naivety, of being blindsided by those she trusted.
This complex interplay would have taken a toll on her, especially during her formative years. The constant oscillation between wanting to embrace her unique essence and the crushing weight of seeking validation could have led to inner turmoil. The battle between the Aquarian need for rebellion and the 2nd House's yearning for stability might have left scars that are not easily seen but deeply felt.
While the universe might sketch paths filled with stars and dreams, Taylor's particular alignment speaks of storms, lessons, and the darker shades of love and value. It’s a journey not for the faint of heart, and it takes someone of incredible resilience and depth to navigate such turbulent waters.
However the very tensions and conflicts in her chart, the push and pull of freedom versus foundation, of reality versus dream, are what fuel her unparalleled creative power. They have forged her into an artist who doesn't just sing songs but crafts anthems, who doesn't just tell stories but defines eras.
Get your own Venus (Love × Relationship) Reading @ astroash.net
TikTok - astroa3h
#astrology#astrology readings#pop culture#taylor swift#astrology aspects#natal chart#celebrity#astrology degrees#history#astrologer#1989 taylor's version#taylornation#swifties#tswift#the eras tour#eras tour#speak now taylor’s version#aquarius#aquarius venus#birth chart#astro notes#astrology notes#astro posts
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Fairy tales in BD: Beauté
Once upon a time, there was a poor and ugly girl who lived alone with her godmother's house - and she was a wicked woman who forced the girl to work every day scaling fishes, until she smelled so bad she was nicknamed "Cod". One day, tired by the abuse and injustice her village placed upon her due to her looks, she cried in the forest all alone, and one of her tears fell onto a toad - which turned into a pretty little fairy named Mab. The fairy, set free from a curse by Cod's tear, rewarded her with a wish, and Cod asked to be beautiful. Mab was unable to change her body, but she rather cast an illusion spell that would make her the most beautiful woman in the world - and soon, with her newfound beauty, she caught the eye of the local lord...
Sounds like a perfect fairytale? Guess again: it is not. In this macabre but elegant farce, which oscillates between a heartbreaking tragedy and a fairytale parody, everything goes wrong. Cod is not the perfect and virtuous fairytale heroine: she is an ordinary, uneducated, poor girl who doesn't understand the consequences of her actions or the nature of her fairy-gift. Mab is not the kind and benevolent fairy she pretends to be, but turns out to be a manipulative and malicious force. As for the gift of "beauty" the girl received... turns out being the most beautiful and desirable woman in the world - quite literaly -, in a medieval society where violence rules and immorality boils underneath every person's surface, causes many more deaths, wars and suicides than happy endings and beautiful weddings. And Cod's simple wish to be happy will change the face of the world... for the better and the worst.
Created by Hubert and Kerascoët, this fairytale deconstruction treads very well on the thin line between an humoristic pastiche and a macabre twist, constantly switching from a socio-philosophical satire to personal tragedies, from a fantasy romance to the most cynical dark comedy, resulting in a tale that manages to be, surprisingly, both "dark" and "light" at the same time - but definitively not for kids.
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Mmm haven’t posted the chapter of Lord, what fools these mortals be! where Fae!Kristin shows up but I want to ramble about characterization so. Ahh. Anyway, fae!Philza is pretty upfront with his creepy fairy shtick. Incredibly possessive, clearly operating on an alien morality system (or lack there of), oscillating between kindness and a cruel apathy for Tommy’s feelings. Kristin though….she’s a LOT more subtle. There’s warning signs of course, such as the sudden extreme violence. Philza had that too, of course, but never directed at the kid he’s trying to manipulate. But Kristin gets away with it. She wants them to survive, of course. She’s just trying to make them better. And it clearly works. Kristin’s just so nice, and over protective, and clearly lonely. She’s frequently reassuring to Wilbur and Technoblade but it’s in a way that hides her true plan if not her intentions. No, she’s very clear about wanting their souls forever, but all her blatant tactics are decoys. She’s far more subtle than Philza. She gives Wil and Techno everything they want till they don’t even consider leaving even as they’re determined to never fall into the obvious, fun traps, the type they joke about at dinners so the men feel like they’re outwitting her while all the while she’s unraveling their character flaws until they’re fully ensnared. She designs the rules of the game to mold them into her perfect children. Little details piling up until it’s revealed she’s completely altered their bodies until they’re unrecognizable as human, so slowly neither even noticed. And she’s shaped their thoughts for decades to the point they don’t even care. Why should they? She’s just trying to make them better. And it’s Kristin that reveals why the Fae rulers even need children: they keep accidentally murdering their kids. It’s why she’s so over protective. It’s why she wanted Techno and Wil to be better, promised them power in a way that was honey poison to their ambitions and made them prisoners of the fae world no matter how free they thought they were.
That’s the real difference between Fae Phil and Kristin. All three Neapolitan trio felt scared, but Tommy was never given the illusion of protecting himself while in actuality only endangering himself further. His fear saved him.
And that’s why Tommy’s going to escape, while Techno and Wilbur willingly go back.
#I tried to write a comedy I swear to god#And I did!#Just#the dark fae elements seeped in when I wasn’t looking#On my life this story is actually really hilarious. All the dark stuff is lurking beneath the surface. Watching. Waiting.#Also the complete foil reversal of Tommy grind from oblivious and vulnerable>scared and wary#While Techno and Wil go from wary>over confident (and thus vulnerable)#So good#Anyway didn’t plan for this to be#Dark sbi#But I guess that’s what it became
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Laurie's drugged-up heterotopia
Wohoo I finally got around to continue reading. So: Laurie is transferring out of the EMS hospital and into the city hospital. Right before, within a staggeringly short interval, he kisses Andrew, has a sex dream about Ralph and feels arousal when kissing Nurse Adrian. That‘s a lot of action for our boy. The Andrew kiss has its own reasons, but for the other two I would say they‘re connected: Laurie is mostly off the drugs.
Throughout the first half of the book Laurie oscillates between being in pain and being high on pain killers. Both options are pretty unsexy. He spends a lot of time considering his disability, but besides that naturally is pretty out of touch with his own physicality. Ideal conditions to strive towards a sweet sweet platonic love.
There‘s a lot of reasons why Laurie has a "love at first sight" moment with Andrew. Andrew looks like young Ralph, wears the same color as their school uniform, whistles classical music, is one of the first young middle class guys Laurie has opportunity to interact with in a while, and is unattainable enough to fit into Laurie's romantic ideal.
On my first read I was surprised about Laurie‘s sudden acceptance of his romantic feelings for Andrew. It made him come across as quite well-adjusted, mature and confident. This illusion was maintained until he had to start going into the city. He's young and all muddled up and here it really shows. When Laurie accepts his romantic feelings for Andrew, he doesn‘t accept his own homosexuality, that‘s where my confusion lay. He accepts a philosophy that's supposed to discreetly deal with the problem. He accepts inaction.
There‘s many strong allegorical contrasts in the book that represent the choice of action or inaction: To fight in the war or not to, to be stationary or in constant movement, the countryside and the city. Laurie‘s stay at the EMS reminds me of a heterotopia. It‘s idyllic, you see very little of the actual war. He’s surrounded by a strange array of people he wouldn’t normally interact with. He‘s doped up, in Eden, then in Limbo. Andrew to him is this this mix between a real person and an idea. I always had the feeling that Laurie preferred Andrew that way. I‘ll get back to it when I get to Andrew‘s last letter, but I don‘t think Laurie desired for Andrew to be attainable.
Then Laurie gets out of his drug-fueled haze, gets thrown out of his idyll into the real world and realizes that unfortunately he wants to fuck.
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