When I start crying
I often find
that I just can't stop,
and I begin to wonder
if anyone has ever drowned
in their bedroom before.
- G.L. Angelone
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i am God’s shrivelled heart
i am his left-handed son
to short to reach around
but with just enough pull to make kingdoms come
i am the promise of free will
i am the meek and meager offerings of flesh
bread and body soaked in wine and blood
prayers forever thirsty and thirsting
i am God’s shrivelled heart
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Imperial June
#imperialjune
crisis management
cutting your own hair
heirlooms
burning bridges
ghosts
hollow points
shallow waters
ruins
riveting tales
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She screams
I scratch,
Whirling
Flakes of snow,
The skin falls
/
He hollers
I scratch,
The barriers stretch
Elastic, expanding
Until they can take
No more
/
The hollow words
the gurgling toads
Ricochet, feed on sleep,
Nails dig and scratch
for sweet release
/
Walls thin, painted red
Trail into the river
Of shame,
Nails dig further, making
Tributaries upon tributaries,
It is my fate
The scarred flesh
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A Feud to Carry Vol. 2, 2.1.24
“30 Days; Or Less”
February is the month of mistakes
Trial and error
The second beginning, to pick up the pieces
Left by January, left by the prior year
Left by everyone around you
And make something of the days
Building each one upon the next
Snapping into place
The shortest month
Therefore the safest to try
Let this be the beginning
Of the next day and the next day
Each step gaining speed
In the downhill race to March
Stumbling to find that rhythm
Even if you tumble and roll
Towards that goal
You are still, yes still, moving forward
@env0writes C.Buck
Ko-Fi & Venmo: @Zenv0
Support Your Local Artist!
Photo by @mynamemeanscloud
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Spilled Inktober, 10.9.23
“Repetitive Bookworming"
How wise these gentle shepherds of souls must be
To gnaw such scholars to the core
Greater than any Alexandria, if we could usurp the almighty
What knowledge to use to wage this holy war
Oh, messengers of the departed, dearly pass on
Knowledge and spirits as well
Look into the light, so that the cycle moves onward, time is gone
As our the books, empty bindings on the shelf, like hell
Again, the words are missing, where did they go?
Father, mother, gone to the flame
Knowledge pursuit in desperate flow
Consume each line, lettered, fettered with blame
Another book, another tome, another hallway wings will roam
Flitter, flit, and flick each page
Such records read, soon consumed, and laid in loam
Oh, the flame should fill all with rage
Red and bright, oh, burning light
Where gentle souls seek out to chase
Pass on, you weary readers, into the night
Sleep, oh, dream, of distant lands and lives to soon embrace
@env0writes C.Buck
Ko-Fi & Venmo: @Zenv0
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Photo by @env0
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STARDUST AND DEAD LOVE
i saw constellations in your eyes
and with you
i didn’t see a whole new life
i saw another galaxy
i saw a future like the sky
every opportunity
with you i saw a family
and maybe i just fantasized
the way your eyes
had this way
of defying gravity
and i’d forget
that shooting stars were once alive
but like us they’re just a tragedy
// Ophydia
—
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routine love. written for @writeblrcafe‘s prompt: "There was a certain comfort to be found in predictability”. Text ID under cut.
My day starts at 5 am, an hour before your alarm clock blares,
stirring you from whatever soft dreamland you found yourself in—
by the time I’m showered, dressed, and awake, it’s 5:25 am.
I fix you breakfast first, your favourite, muesli with fruit.
It’s been soaking in milk overnight in the refrigerator, just how
you like it—I slice up a banana, quarter strawberries, and grab
a handful of blueberries and do my best to aesthetically plate them,
and top it off with a drizzle of honey. The clock reads 5:32 am.
You like starting off your day with a heaping dose of good news,
I scour the internet for any article—I come across an article about
how solar energy generated one terawatt of energy (a milestone),
another article about how one community in Hawaii got together
to shred cardboard together to recycle, and prevent it from going to
landfill. I settle on the article about a group of California elementary
students launching a helpline, offering advice, kind words, pep talks
from kindergarteners, and the ability to hear kids laughing with delight.
I send the article to your phone. The clock reads 5:40 am.
At 5:52 am, I’ll start on your coffee—you like it warm, brewed for
four and a half minutes, with a touch of almond milk. In the mean
time, I read poetry, screenshotting the poems I know you’d love.
At 6:01 am, I’m on your side of the bed, bartering your sleepy kisses
for a warm cup of coffee—it’s for this precise moment I awake an hour
earlier than I need to. How sweet it is, our love perfected to the point of
a morning routine.
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If you needed space, I would leave you the moon. Steal some stars to sit among. See as they shine for you.
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May I spill the wine that crosses your lips as midnight kisses tantalize my everything? Sleepless nights give way to memories of dawns, as liquor fuels my need and my distractions. I have become aware of the disillusion of my mind's distortions while sands of time strike away at the falling stars, leaving nothing but memories to these starless skies. I remember all of the promises we made when we began this dance and led our future by the hands as epic moments opened up their arms wide to let us in. You have my heart, my soul, my being, though tears may flow, the love between grows, as space opens and welcomes us to the precipice where there is no choice but to fall deeper into me and you.
-H. Murcia 11:28 AM 2/18/2022
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Twenty seven thresholds crossed
Only to end up
In a garden of walls
Peace loves the chase
Why wouldn’t it, even
The universe just keeps going
There’s nothing left to prove
Now that I’m useless, still missing
And, captain -
I can’t help but
Feel free
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there's no sugar in this 'daddy', only piss and vinegar. nothing sweet remains. nothing darling.
something clever
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Imperial May
#imperialmay
nothingness
silence
worthlessly dreaming
acid
nameless
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SO HERE’S THE THING
the pages flew back to me
(back in time) and they scream—
they feel so sticky
sweet,
crumbled up in a shotgun shell that someone painted pink
[[[[[[[ i’m writing for my memory ]]]]]]]
they tell me of spiced holiday candle wax, and remind me of a lingerie store that smells like swarovski crystals, and the idea of incense that’ll never leave the packageee.
IDK about YOU
but TO ME
that sounds like duplicity and a hint of ✨black magic✨
looks like someone turned the light out and forgot to clean the static
~forgot to clear the damage
// Ophydia
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Janus Estuaries Vol. 3, 1.1924
“Another Off The List: Another On"
The hard part about having too much to do
Is writing down a list
The hardest part about writing down a list
Is that it is one more thing to do
On the newly formed list
Of things to do
Now there is one more thing to do
DONE
There is one less thing to do now
On the long list of many things to do
They are good things
Careful, loving things
Groceries, Dishes, Laundry, Sleep
Taxes, Writing, Eating, Sleep
Finding rest at end of day
Finding words, to her, to say
Getting out with strangers dare
Knowing that the world doesn’t play fair
There is so much left yet to do
I wonder what comes next
I wonder if you wonder too
@env0writes C.Buck
Ko-Fi & Venmo: @Zenv0
Support Your Local Artist!
Photo by @env0
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I see stars in shades of blue
they flicker red
and change their hue
I look in eyes that fall in love
and when they look back
mine flicker too
// Ophydia
02.22.27
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