#post about it sometime i just need to do my research first. but it’s weird right it’s weird.

[planet4546b]

destiny look me in the eyes. look at me. start redeeming your girlboss villains NOW im not joking.

[slyandthefamilybook]

What is the Accountability Archive?

(I was gonna make this an addition to another post but OP turned off reblogs while I was halfway through my deep dive so I'm making my own)

With any activism (or something trying to pass itself off as activism), especially list-making like this site, the most important question to ask is "why". What is the purpose? What do they hope to accomplish? How will this data be used?

The answer is......eh? The list is being compiled so that possibly someday some future historian might maybe think about wanting to form a committee to explore the possibility of..."understanding how 'power holders' manufacture consent". These power holders are, of course, politicians, but also journalists?, and "public figures", which is an extremely vague term. Am I a public figure? I certainly make my opinions public. So when these future researchers want to understand the nature of the current conflict, they won't need to look at the history of the region, the contemporary local politics as well as the international stage, and the personalities of the specific people involved. They'll just check out this eyesore of a website to find proof that slyandthefamilybook supports genocide. And future lawyers will be able to use this incontrovertible evidence to...sorry, to prosecute war crimes?????? Sorry, I couldn't help but laugh at that one. Well if I am on there it shouldn't be too hard to check. Surely a site called the "Accountability Archive" believes in transparency

Oh. Well. I'm sure if you pass their screening process they'll respond promptly from their encrypted archive-less email and definitely give you access. But don't worry. They have a "vision" of one day making this public. When are we the people going to be able to see the info? I want the juicy deets on who is and isn't a Zionist!

So, sometime in the future. Maybe. Probably. Well what kind of info are they collecting anyway?

Alright, seems normal so far. I appreciate that when talking about targeting of civilian populations or infrastructure they've remained impartial. I submitted a page from the ADL cataloguing US professors who celebrated Hamas' pogrom on 10/7. I will let you know how or if they respond

One thing I've noticed is the distinctly European spelling of some words like "dehumanisation" and "analyse". So who are these people even? They must have pictures, or names, or evidence of their bona fides. They claim to be "middle east experts" [sic] so surely they'll link articles they've written, or talk about degrees or accolades they've received. Something, anything to let us know that they're real serious people who know what they're talking about

Well that's......I mean that's not even an answer. You don't answer the question of "who are we" with "this is the purpose of our website". They have a Twitter, which despite being made in October 2023 (huh. weird) only made its first post in February 2024

The site itself went live on November 22, 2023, but according to Google was only certified as of 9 days ago

I'm not going to try to dig into who potentially runs the account. I don't want to doxx anyone. But this should give you an overview of what this site is and why you definitely shouldn't use it

[copperbadge]

Sam, I must know what sort of things Gerald blogs about on his Tumblr. How old or active is his account? Is his identity a secret?

It's actually a reference to an older post where @dignitywhatdignity pointed out there was no way Ger wasn't on Tumblr. :D Reproduced my response below -- first, Photogram:

I can picture Jerry’s Photogram in my head very clearly because I’ve had to research the children of rich people and their fucking obnoxious instas, and Jerry’s is probably equal parts expensive cars, club glam, and scenic vistas, but mainly because that’s like…what you do. It’s just kind of the done thing, like wearing a shirt when you leave the house. 

Update: Gerald's photogram has shifted radically -- he still treats it as a Thing You Do but especially now that he's a dad it's a lot more Parenting Lifestyle stuff. Because a few of my friends have had babies in the last two years and I had to research the babies my fictional characters were having, the algo now thinks I have baby fever, so I get a lot of Parent Influencer content, and I bet Gerald does a lot of sly fun-poking at that stuff. Like, posting a photo of a bottle warmer and a bib-washing tabletop machine with commentary like "You cannot buy any of this in the shop I don't have, but if you're going to buy one stupid thing as a parent, buy the bib washer. Not a single shirt you own will be unstained but the bibs will be immaculate."

They don't post pictures of Serafina, though -- there are a couple of official portraits for PR reasons but day-to-day that shit is locked to friends and family only. (There are special websites for this, I have friends who use them, it's pretty neat.) The only time random candids of her are out there are usually when someone snaps Michaelis toting her around Fons-Askaz with her cousins -- the "King Emeritus and Royal Ducklings" are becoming a very familiar sight. At least once a week Michaelis takes Noah and Joan out for an afternoon in town with Sera in a snugli and the twins in a stroller. Don't ask him about his stepson and grandkids unless you really want to hear about them.

Meanwhile he also definitely has a secret super-weird tumblr and nobody can figure out if he’s roleplaying or shitposting or what when he posts stuff like “The family groupchat is all well and good until it starts heavily impacting local politics.” Are those horses really his or is he just visiting a barn? Is that…a photo of a plate full of appetizers at “My cousin’s latest house party” with Angela Merkel in the background? He certainly has some strong feelings about Princess Diana and equally strong feelings about Tsar Nicholas. Why is he one of only three people the official Eddie Rambler tumblr follows?

Gerald's tumblr has also slowed down since the diagnosis and becoming a dad, but the content is still random as hell and more authentically wild than his photogram. Again, no photos of Serafina, but it's very evident that whoever is running that particular tumblr has had a kid, or is pretending they have. He gets asks accusing him of faking shit for clout and every time he does, his response is simply to write the ask on a sheet of paper in longhand and photograph it in front of a famous European landmark and/or political figure.

Alanna tolerates this because it does keep him out of mischief and sometimes he takes Serafina with him to whatever landmark he's visiting, and she gets to have a quiet apartment to herself for a while.

(”Eddie Rambler’s on tumblr?” someone asks, and someone else replies “Name me one other TV chef brave AND stupid enough to be on tumblr” and then you realize it is in fact the official Eddie Rambler tumblr saying that.)

Eddie doesn't post to his official Tumblr anymore because he rarely has time and doesn't need to do the self-promotion, but Katie in Communications checks his inbox once a week and brings him the most entertaining asks to respond to. He's currently hovering somewhere around the level of Neil Gaiman in terms of "Famous people who are inexplicably on Tumblr."

Ultimately there develops a running joke that Jerry’s tumblr is run by either a) an upper-class vampire (rude) or b) the elected king of a micronation on the Mediterranean coast with a name nobody can spell (super rude!) 

One time Gerald accidentally pocket-posted a blurry selfie to his Tumblr but it was so poorly focused and clearly accidental that a bunch of people got mad at him for violating the privacy of the Duke of Shivadlakia. He had to pretend to have a week-long beef with himself to save face. He eventually got Noah to take a selfie with him, blanked out Noah's face, and then claimed the Duke had forgiven him and here was a selfie with him as proof.

It's a hard old life, being Duke of Shivadlakia, but someone's got to do it.

[londonfoginacup]

A New Larrie’s Guide to Tumblr

A probably incomprehensible, certainly incomplete list of what you need to know; whether you’re coming from a different platform or discovering Larry for the first time. 

My credentials

Hello! I’m Emmu. I’ve had tumblr since… 2008? Maybe 2009. I moved over from deviantArt and used Tumblr as a personal art blog for many years. I joined the One Direction fandom in 2014, so my 1D blog has 8+ years at this point. That being said, I will get on my soapbox a bit during this. Please excuse me, I’m quite passionate about cultivating a happy and healthy fandom.

What makes Tumblr different

The biggest thing that makes Tumblr, as a site, different from Twitter or Instagram is the rejection of algorithms. The “following” tab on your dashboard is in chronological order (and if it isn’t, you can – and should – change that), and the “for you” tab is both a recent feature and rarely used. Tumblr has very little algorithm, and the algorithm they have isn’t very good. It means that you’ll get the most god awful ads you’ve ever seen on this site, because they don’t utilize your data well. And that’s to your advantage.

Tumblr is a great place because you can curate what you see more than other social media. The people that you choose to follow are the only people that you see on your dash (unless you choose to follow tags, which I guess is an option? @lululawrence says “it is and it used to not do anything unless you went to the search page and then it would like autofill your followed tags options, but NOW they take those followed tags and plop them on your dash... SOMETIMES. usually only on mobile. but if there's only one new post in the tag, it shows you that post OVER. AND OVER. AND OVER AGAIN. IT'S SUPER ANNOYING ACTUALLY. SO I STOPPED FOLLOWING TAGS. lol anyway”).

So, the site is in chronological order. This is its biggest selling point.

There is also the opportunity for long posts. Masterposts. Things that are searchable without having to read through pages of screenshots or condensed twitter threads. You can write a whole lot more without worrying about character limit. People publish whole fics on here (I suggest ao3 for that, but tumblr is technically an option!).

Another important thing to know about tumblr is that the archives on tumblr run deep. There are newer larries here, and a lot of them, but you can also find older larries. People whose 1D blogs go back to 2010 or 2011. You can dive into the archives and read firsthand accounts of what was happening with One Direction or larry at that very time. Doing a bit of research means you find cute fetus pictures of the boys, but also you’re able to figure out for yourself whether something actually happened. Rumors always seem to spread quite easily and fandom memory always seems impossibly short, but here on tumblr you’re able to find out for yourself. That means the next time you hear about how xyz thing happened a long time ago, check out some of those archives and see what you can find.

Also, my personal favorite part of tumblr is that old posts are just as valid as new posts. Find a masterpost about RBB and SBB from 2015? Go ahead and reblog that; bring it back to the circulating dash. People will love that. Find a fanartist that you really like? Search through their tags, reblog anything you want. It’s not considered stalking or weird in any way. We love bringing back old posts here. Tumblr is a website where you’re not meant to just talk about the present. 

The cultural difference between Tumblr and Twitter

Speaking of the ways that tumblr and twitter are different, let’s talk for a moment about the 1D fandom in particular.

I’ve held this theory for a while that the twitter (and instagram) algorithm is fracturing the fandom. Because twitter is so dependent on the algorithm, people are more likely to split apart and join smaller and smaller communities based on smaller, more specific opinions. Tumblr, being a place where you don’t just get a post on your dash because someone else liked it, doesn’t have those smaller cliques. There are larries, and there are antis.

(if you get really in the weeds, there are also larry shippers [who don’t believe they’re together but like to read it in fic], and houis [who think they were together but broke up], but I just don’t hear about them as much).

While I do occasionally hear about blouies on my dash, for the most part this is a culture that exists primarily on other sites. 

On another note, because tumblr doesn’t have that handy algorithm, we have to work to make it a more active space. Likes don’t do anything here for anyone other than you, and it doesn’t really change anything about what you’ll see on your dash. Think of them more like the bookmark setting on twitter or instagram. Reblogs are necessary to get anything spread. Anything that you enjoy, or that looks interesting for any reason? Reblog it! That’s the only way other people will see it! And leave a happy comment in the tags if you’ve got one (more on that later). 

And, while lurkers do exist in this fandom (and we love them), it’s important to get an icon and blog header that make you look like a real person. People on tumblr have long been in the habit of blocking shady blogs, mostly because of a bot problem, so if you want to lurk, you have to look like a lurker. Maybe reblog a post or two to establish yourself, and make sure you don’t accidentally look like an icon-less bot posing as a sugar daddy. 

How to set up your account

Okay, so you’ve got a tumblr. Let’s take a minute to fix up the settings so that you’re not getting, well, the worst version of the site. 

My advice is to start by going into your dashboard preferences and:

Turn off the best stuff first (it’ll just show you things you’ve already seen)

Turn off “include stuff in your orbit” (you’ll see terrible posts that are mostly NOT in your orbit)

Turn off “Included based on your likes” (again, you’ll see posts you hate)

Turn off “shorten long posts”. It’s a ridiculous setting that, like many things on tumblr, had potential but was rolled out in an incredibly unhelpful and user unfriendly way.

Once you’ve got that squared away, go into filtering and block any tags and content you don’t like, as that is always proper fandom etiquette. Not seeing things you don’t like is your responsibility, not the responsibility of the person posting them. I personally suggest adding the topics you don’t want to see to both the content list and the filtered tags list, as that gives a much better likelihood of posts that are particularly unsavory for you getting caught by the filters. Please also note this might need to be done on both desktop and the app separately as, depending on where tumblr is at the moment, these filters do not always carry over from one application to the other.

Now scroll down to tumblr labs. These are their experimental things. Some are good! Some are very bad. They do change, though, so this might get out of date pretty fast.

Personally, I enabled fast queue

And disabled everything else

ALSO, an important note, if you are using the apple app, you need to go in and turn off the adult content filter. No idea offhand where that is, but it means posts that include tags like “mine” and “girl” are blocked. It’s ridiculous. 

Who to follow and how to find them

So, you’ve got a new tumblr and need people to follow. This makes sense! To really fill up your dash, I’d suggest the following

Find one person you like. There’s a good chance you know at least someone from twitter who also has a tumblr, so you can start there. If you’re not from twitter, or are looking to start fresh, you can dive into the search function (I’ve never tried finding someone this way myself, but searching larry stylinson or something similar would probably get you started)

Find the people they reblog from and check out each of their blogs! Follow people that make you happy

Follow some update accounts! Thinking of some off the top of my head, there’s @HLUpdate, @Stylesnews, @dailytomlinson, @HLDailyUpdate, or @neilswaterbottles (there’s definitely more though). 

Follow some fanart or fic rec accounts! 

I’d always suggest @1d-fanart or @hlcreators for art. 

For fic, you could check out @hlficlibrary, @ficsyoumayhavemissed, or @thelarriefics. 

Or, recurring fic fests! @onedirectionbigbang or @wordplayfics, which happen every year.

And if you end up not enjoying someone you’ve followed? Unfollow them! It’ll make you happier.

How to interact with posts

Tumblr is all about tags. Do you have a comment or thought? Reblog a post and say your thought in the tags. That way anyone you follow will see it, and the person who made the post will see it. This way a post doesn’t end up with a lot of cluttery additions that don’t mean a lot to the average person reblogging it, but if you browse the tags of posts you’ll find lots of interesting things. Tags can be used to keep track of things, too, of course — some people tag all pictures with who’s in them, or tag art or fic with tags that mean they can find them again. Tags are versatile! But reblog, don’t just like, and tag! The more you interact, the happier content creators are!

What not to do

Don’t repost. If you see something you like on tumblr, reblog it. Even if it’s a really old piece of fanart (like circa 2011). Reblog that old post! Reposting means people don’t get credit, and it doesn’t link back to them. That’s not cool, and in the long term makes fandom less happy.

How to cultivate a happy and healthy fandom

Send happy anons! Ask how people are doing, do question memes, say how much you loved fic/art/edits, etc.

Reblog art. Reblog fic. Reblog what makes you laugh. The more you reblog, the more other people see, the more the fandom moves! Content creators just want their things seen; every time you reblog, their phone gets that little notification and you’ve given someone a bit of happiness.

Unfollow people who annoy you. Follow people who make you happy!

If someone has a take about 1D that you don’t agree with, don’t tell them or send them argumentative anons. Find people who will agree with you, and complain to them privately. Or make your own post, not shading anyone, just presenting your own opinion and theories!

Remember that everyone is a real person. Cut them some slack when you find them being annoying. But also, unfollow. Curate your dash.

[nights-at-crystarium]

on authenticity

My mood in the recent months keeps going from bad to worse. Today I randomly fell into the rabbit hole of checking out other patreon artists, which always grounds me in reality and cheers me up, perhaps in a weird way. Essay incoming \o/

Authenticity is a blob of a word that sounds almost pretentious nowadays. It gets sneered at. You either sell your soul, or you don't earn with your art.

What's authentic, being true to yourself, will vary from person to person. It's like a sliding scale of suffering that you will tolerate in exchange for a coin, while convincing yourself that you have fun.

The harsh truth of modern world is that if your art pays for your living, you've already reached success, no matter how you may feel about the type of content you actually make for that money. Insert the meme furry nsfw art here. Or not furry. Or even sfw, but comms, lots of comms every month. Or merch. Anything that sells. Products first, art second.

Marrying passion and profession is virtually impossible, yet I'm doing it, only thanks to your support. I'm acutely aware that, even as I choose to be "real" and talk about an artist's money-making in a raw way, it's still patreon talk, and yes, I'll plug the link as well, so technically this entire post is an ad *fingerguns*

I just feel so privileged being able to create whatever the fuck I want, literally, I take no comms/requests/guidance on what and how should I draw/write, I post experimental, sometimes provocative stuff, and still make enough to survive. This sole fact should get me through the day, whatever other struggles I may be facing currently (I am. I don't wanna talk about it rn, instead I distract myself with this text), I should always remember the unique place in life I managed to carve for myself.

There are madmen (gender-neutral) who toss $10-20 at me every month. The majority "only" pledges $1, the notorious tier that gets treated as a tip jar with no rewards by many other creators. All of my rewards are the same at $1 and $20 (save for the one-time digital artbook download at $10, just to be perfectly clear), it's a conscious choice and a risk I continue taking because it's how I am. I used to split rewards between tiers in the past, before xiv, and it was a lot of busy work while it made me treat my art less as art and more as product. This pic goes into the cheap box, this pic goes into the expensive box. Every month. It's. Definitely not for every artist.

Logistic hell of splitting and delivering rewards, different posts with less comments per post, also my discord roles/channels would have to be split, nowadays it's just patron, whether you give me $1 or $20, there's no visual disparity, you're hanging out in the same cool kids' club, and collectively making happy noises on Fragments Fridays.

Could I be making more money if I got rid of the $1 tier? Yeah. But, mercifully, after 2 years I don't need to. I legit make enough currently, my only worry is to keep what I have. Patrons don't stay forever, 2-5 people would leave every month, about the same number would join (hence my patreon ads, I need to keep people reminded of it, even if it makes me feel guilty every damn time). I did Research (tm) in the past to find out that my "bleeding" numbers are below average, i.e. it's good, people generally tend to stick around.

I put a lot of emphasis on the $1 because I'm kinda proud of what I managed to accomplish while staying self-detrimentally humble. Literally doing an impossible thing in a world that keeps burning down. So yeah if you've been feeling bad for only giving me $1, what matters is that there's enough $1s to make a difference. Together you're creating a phenomenon, and you should be proud.

There are many stupid little principles, hills that I'll die on, that make up my authenticity. I chose to speak of it here and now in order to sorta sell myself, so it feels hypocritical x'D But if I don't shine a spotlight on this, who will. I'm old and jaded and increasingly terrified of how insincere the internet's becoming. Everything's fake, sugarcoated, polished for sale. My art's always been a scream of defiance against all that, now that I'm more or less established, I wanna scream louder. Thanks for hearing my screams. You can scream with me too if you want.

[softxsuki]

I feel like this is a weird request, and I just wanted to say before hand that I’m not in this situation anymore but sometimes I imagine something similar happened when it was in effect. Could you maybe write about the toman boys (as a group, as toman I mean) somehow finding out their friend is currently an active victim of sex trafficking? How they’d react to it and stuff? I think a lot of ppl dont realize a lot of times with kids it’s not being thrown in a cage or something, often they let you go to school and live a normal life too. If you feel the need to do research b4 writing BTW, I recommend watching some TIKTOKS by nicolegrows as she had a very similar experience to me

Toman with Reader Who is A Victim of Trafficking

DO NOT. I REPEAT. DO. NOT. READ THIS IF MENTIONS OF SEX TRAFFICKING WILL TRIGGER YOU!

Pairings: Toman x Gn!reader (platonic)

Warnings: mentions of sex trafficking, needing counseling for trauma/PTSD

Genre: Comfort

Post-Type: Headcanons

Word Count: 470

Summary: In which Toman finds out that you're actively a victim of sex trafficking

[A/N; Thanks for letting me know that this request was actually urgent. I just got a second today to write this. The best I could do was headcanons, because I physically couldn't write out a more detailed description of this scenario, but I hope it's helpful. You just said Toman, so I wrote how the gang as a whole would respond to finding out about this! I'm glad you made it through something as horrible as this. The world is a scary place.

cutting this here, incase anyone ignores my warnings. PROCEED WITH CAUTION PLS.

Okay well first of all, as soon as they find out that you’re in any kind of danger, Mikey commands everyone immediately to get into action to save you

You’re their friend; though not officially in the gang because they didn’t want to put you into any danger from the many enemies they have, you remained friendly with each other and hung out frequently

Baji was the one who noticed something strange, so he took matters into his own hands; he secretly followed you around and took note of any suspicious activity he saw from the people around you

But certain things made everything very clear and so he reported it all to Mikey right away, who them proceeded to act immediately

Their first step is taking you away from the people who are doing this to you–whether you’re aware of your situation or not; it doesn’t matter, they’re getting you out of there

It becomes a small operation, only the Captains and vice captains of the divisions along with Mikey and Draken are in charge of safely collecting you and ensuring that you never have to be in that environment again

They call the police to inform them, and show up to your “home” without their gang uniforms on–their job is to take you out of there, not draw attention to themselves and risk the perpetrators running off before the police even arrive. The police could deal with everything else when they got there

It took everything in Toman not to take their anger out on your “caretakers”; it was now Toman’s job to take care of you and give you a new home with them, not get in trouble and leave you alone

Obviously, you needed a lot of support from all your friends, and professional support as well, which they all helped you out with

Mitsuya was probably the one you ended up confiding in the most–being as he was an older brother to his younger sisters, you felt especially safe with him

But aside from him, the boys all made you feel very welcome and safe

If they weren’t protective of you before, they definitely were now

Mikey had ordered someone to always be on guard of you at all times, if he wasn’t available to do it (he usually was, but in the rare case that he couldn’t, another toman member would quietly be keeping an eye on you from afar)

You’d most likely be living with Mikey and his Grandfather, who treated you with so much kindness and understanding after Mikey explained everything to the older man

You were Toman’s family now and they’d do anything to make sure you continued your life the way you were meant to live it; helping you with anything you needed in the process to recover and overcome everything that had happened to you.

REQUESTS ARE OPEN :D

Posted: 5/11/2023

[nozunhinged]

7 BL Newbie Moments of 2023 That Altered My Brain Chemistry

So I went through all my posts since the beginning of this journey and as much as I love dumping my insanity here without context or any punctuation, I feel that a lot of my fav moments deserve a bit more love and structure.

But first I need to put a bit of context so you won't be like "who the hell do they think they are" (aside from delusional I'm nothing, I promise) and my anxious overexplainer-heart is silenced.

My first BL TV show was Only Friends and only 5 months later I'm already throat deep into it (sorry). My watchlist is so endless that I sometimes (no, regularly) genuinely fear for my sanity. I'm still learning all the names and production houses but does that stop me from starting 10 other shows? NOPE.

I'm not new to queer fan spaces (avid manga reader since the yaoi days, my first ship was taito from digimon) but I am most definitely new to the brainrot levels these shows gave me.

And believe it or not, even though my shipper heart is over a decade old, I'm new to Tumblr and the fuel this platform added to the fire could burn down entire continents.

ANYWAYS if you're still here — please enjoy Noz's 100% self-indulgent moments!

1. The End And The Beginning - Only Friends

All I did was mindlessly scroll through the tumblr trends, no idea about how this website works, still sour and sad about the loss of my twitter bubble thanks to the elopocalypse—little did I know that fate would lead me to the wonderful world of BL shows! It was like this moment in isekai-esque movies where you get sucked into a world and you go WOOAAH once you arrive.

There was this show—on YouTube—100% unapolagetic about sex, relationships and queerness. Five minutes into the first episode, someone asks if they can bring their boyfriend to a hookup. This was ALL of my wildest dreams come true! Oh boy, was I naive.

I feel like Only Friends had me speedrun the whole BL industry. Branded pairs, production houses, fanservice, obsessive fans & haters, audience reactions influencing the storyline, EVERYTHING happened during Only Friends and I was just like "what the hell is going on here?" It was like the perfect case study for literally everything. Honestly I still don't really understand what's going on.

Unfortunately, this also led to the awful ending I erased from my brain and don't want to get into, I'm just gonna say Boston I will never forgive the writers for what they did to you. I dropped that show like a hot potato, filtered all possible tags and moved on — or so I thought.

I feel like I'm trying to recreate that first excitement when I discovered OF. But 20 shows later, I'm still not there. Does this make me sound like an addict? Yes, and this is why Only Friends EP 1 is my No. 1 moment that altered my brain chemistry.

2. The Boeing Incident - Only Friends

I talked about it just yesterday and I need to do it again because Boeing was the beginning of a thing that thought I'd never be capable of: lusting after real person TV characters. I talked about it in length here and here so the only thing I'm gonna add just for good measure is that I'd do anything, anything for a BostonBeoingNOZ threesome. Holy shit I'm cringing just writing this down but I need to get my point across.

3. Still Looking For That Kiss - Love in The Air

I know this is a general experience at this point but the chemistry between the couples in Love In The Air opened a whole knew world for me. I thought I knew chemistry but when I saw them, I realized I knew NOTHING.

It may sound weird but I'm still looking for that perfect kiss that's hitting all the right neurons in my brain. I have a hunch that one of these two pairs will deliver them one day, but until then I NEED to watch a million kisses for research.

This post by @talistheintrovert explains perfectly what I think about kissing in shows. Ji Chang Wook is still the blueprint for me.

But do I have a favorite BL kiss so far? Yes, yes I do. It's this ShinPeach beauty.

4. Main Lead Syndrome - Kiseki: Dear To Me

I am a second lead, side couple enby before I am human but I will defend these two until the end of time. My TL is flooded with Chen Yi, Ai Di, Nat and Louis while these two are over here falling in love over strawberry cake, cat analogies, failed cooking and all sorts of memory loss. Zongyi opened a fucking bakery for his babygirl and Zerui pretended to be a pretty dumdum to protect the love of his life.

I don't care how much you all love the two dumb (affectionately) gangsters, these two deserve the world, end of story. Also Kai Hsu and Taro Lin are bff's irl now, Taro said that Kai helped him get out of a very bad mental tate and I take that very personally.

5. The Fanservice is Fanservicing - Kiseki: Dear To Me

Speaking of Taro and Kai, the fact that I even know that they're bff's is another brainaltering moment that needs recognition because months later it led me to this TikTok of two actors I don't know of a show I don't watch, staring at them for ages and really considering watching it just because of it.

That is the power of fanservice my friends and I can put on my clownmask now because I avidly screamed left and right that fanservice should be forbidden when I learned about it. I blame Kiseki for that. But my point still stands, I hate actors doing stuff they're uncomfortable with. I just hope they're all friends and have fun and get that coin.

6. The One Just For Me - Playboyy

I've been lurking around Playboyy from the moment I found out they have the same writer as OF. And boy did it deliver so far! I already wrote a bunch here about which role Playboyy plays for me, but it's also a wonderful case study for my producer heart — watching the acting, directing, lighting, sets, props and storyline interact is fascinating.

People say the less you notice the better the show, which is correct, but I love all the flaws of this piece of media. IMHO it's the last puzzlepiece of the amazing, important social commentary the show delivers. All of the topics the couples represent need to get their very own show.

7. The Holy Grail - The Sign

Speaking of the less you notice — this is the sign for The Sign (again, sorry). There's a reason this show is loved and praised so widely because the production is on a whole other level. Adding the beautiful story on top of that, we have the potential for a holy grail here and I'm so in for the ride.

I keep saying I've entered the world of BL in it's absolute golden era. Never in a million years did I think I'd watch 5 shows simultaneosly but I love every single one of them so much I keep a whole spreadsheet on how I can be on time for every premiere every week alongside my work schedule.

Honorable mentions

KinnPorsche: VegasPete were my first dark, angsty, morally questionable couple ever (I'm a sissy okay)

Last Twilight: When I watched Extraordinary Attorney Woo, I cried several times about the wonderful media representation of disability. It means so much to me and Last Twilight is on par with that.

Bake Me Please: Thank you for giving me this beautiful kiss

Manner of Death: Thank you MaxTul for making gay makeouts fashionable

Bad Buddy: The one time I was glad I persisted so I could watch them most adorable phone scene on the planet

I Feel You Linger In The Air: It was too painful for me to finish but I loved the show with my whole heart and it deserves all the awards it got.

Kimi ni Todokanai: Japanese shows just hit different. I'll never get over the kissing Taiyaki.

The Novelist Series: THIS is how you kiss the one you're horny for my friends. Take notes directors.

Semantic Error: My fav webtoon -> Got Viki for the Series -> Found the BL corner of Viki -> Drew my attention to Tumblr -> This post.

Thank you for being the butterfly of my butterfly effect.

And thank YOU if you read until here! To a even more wonderful queer year 2024! I'm so ready for this ride.

[ryuichirou]

what kinda underwear do you think the male cast would wear?? i like to think Jade would go without some days, so improper!! OTL Floyd with the colorful patterns, whether he actually wears them tho is a 60/40. i can see him in those cliche heart boxers very, very easily. Do you think any of the cast would keep their lovers' underwear, like a souvenir? I could see Lilia doing it. 1/3 (the rest is just horny posting for a fish)

2/3 (this is *not* an art request just me being down bad for a semi-crazy assfish) I would die to see jade leech in lingerie OTL i cant think of any scenarios where he'd wear it, but god is it a beautiful mental image. Considering his take on clothing (being a mer+weird asf) I don't think he'd have any actual hangups about it, but he still wouldn't do it under normal circumstances. i think part of the appeal for me, is that you wouldnt expect a guy like him (big, top, JADE) to wear sumn like it

3/3 in conclusion  they took away my license because of how  fast i was undressing him

Hi Anon!

This is such a great theme for hcs, and I am very sorry that it took so long, but please understand: this is a very complicated subject, I just had to do research before writing it. Well, in actuality I was just googling all kinds of underwear over and over again until the picture in my head for every single boy looked right lol We’ll get to hcs shortly, but first I’ll reply to the other things you’ve said!

Btw, this ask is from MARCH, that’s how far behind I am in replying to those.

Totally agree about Lilia stealing his lover’s undies as a souvenir. This is his trophy, and he is very proud of them. He should have a display in his room…

Floyd also has his stealing undies moments. Some of the boys he sleeps with could be smitten with him enough to try to gift him their underwear, and Floyd would go “??? Why the fuck do I need these”. But sometimes? He just steals them lol He totally stole a couple of Riddle’s undies. He doesn’t really store them well though, so they’re just lying around his and Jade’s room…

Rook. Rook would also take trophies. And he would take such good care of them it’s insane. Now this is someone who would have a display somewhere… somewhere where no one would be able to see it unless he wants them to…

I also think Ortho would do it one time just because he wanted to play out the trope of having someone else’s panties in his room, oops! He’s a weird boy.

Can’t say much about Jade in lingerie, but it really would look good, not gonna lie….

Riddle – god I want him to have cute ones with a strawberry print, but realistically he is probably wearing just some plain tighty whities…. unless they have a pretty embroidered “R” on it, which is somehow even worse. I love him so much. Wait, would he be the one to wear undies with the weekdays written on them?

Ace – just some boxer briefs, nothing crazy; he used to have very colourful ones when he was younger, with fun prints and all, but nowadays he tries to be a bit more stylish and mature about it, so a lot of times he goes for dark-red/red/black ones.

Deuce – pretty neutral, but he does have a “lucky” pair of trunks that he always wears when he has something important going on that day… He also has a pair of very good seamless running underwear (deep blue with some light blue patterns), and he kind of cherishes them because it’s an expensive gift. Just wear them and run, Deuce…

Trey – he prefers boxers, the ones that are basically just shorts and aren’t tight. They also look pretty plain, but he has some with the tartan print. Usually green or red… He would look like a Men’s Health model if he wore something less loose and more stylish, but he loves his stupid tartan boxers!

Cater – boxer briefs, but the “leg” part is somewhat shorter; he has a variety of different ones, but it’s almost always some variation of grey and orange. He buys the ones that seem cool to him, even the sillier ones are on the cooler side; he is very happy that his sisters don’t have power over what kind of underwear he wears… he thinks about it every time he looks in the mirror after taking a shower.

Leona – probably something high-end and luxury, but he also doesn’t wear them all the time. He wears something short, slick and sporty when he does anything sport-related and needs support for his balls, but other than that – nah, putting on underwear is just another annoying unnecessary extra thing to do.

Ruggie – he bought the cheapest ones available in bulk when he was like 13, and he still wears them (they were a little big for him when he first got them). His grandma said that it has to be cotton, but other than that – it doesn’t matter, and Ruggie believes it wholeheartedly. So I guess some neutral grey briefs? Nothing too fancy.

Jack – oh this boy. He doesn’t like underwear that doesn’t give him good support, so all of his options fit pretty close to his body. I guess his signature ones would be briefs in which one leg is just plain black, and the other leg has a print of half of the wolf face… what, you think it’s cringe? At least it’s not the ones where the wolf’s face is in the crotch area… Jack actually thinks those are cringe too – he got a pair of those from Ace, Deuce and Epel for his birthday (google wolf underwear)

Azul – Calvin Klein and Hugo Boss are his best friends. Very… gentlemanly. He always picks the ones that would make him feel like a successful young man. They’re not too short, but a little shorter than regular boxer briefs, and always very tight. To some maybe even uncomfortably tight, but Azul doesn’t mind it at all for some reason. He has exactly 10 pairs of grey and purple ones, exactly 10 pairs of black and purple ones and a couple of white ones.

Floyd – a big collection, kind of like with his shoes and socks. He hates plain ones, but some of his undies aren’t obnoxious – he has a couple of pretty stylish and bright ones that aren’t too crazy. But yeah, a lot of them are pretty obnoxious and bright lol He loves loose boxers, but also has some tighter ones too.

Jade – yeah he’d go commando lol But not all the time. His choice of underwear is… eclectic. Of course, he has some plain ones (a couple of those are similar to Azul’s but in a different colour and size), but also? He has some surprisingly silly ones. Of course with mushrooms and stuff, or something that too cursed even for Floyd to wear. It just tickles Jade when he has a secret…

Kalim – luxury underwear! Mostly white + yellow/golden/orange ones, but he has some black ones as well. Super high quality, super special design, super cool-looking actually. And Kalim doesn’t even know that his underwear is different from the rest of the guys, but if he ever was to try on some other type of underwear, he would immediately feel discomfort and say that it doesn’t feel right against his skin. Too rough…

Jamil – his is also pretty high quality; even though his family serves the Asims, I feel like this is exactly why Jamil can afford a good pair of underwear. It’s not even remotely near the price tag of Kalim’s though, god forbid, no one should allow to wear underwear this expensive..! Anyways, since Jamil likes to go sleeveless, he probably prefers underwear that doesn’t cover his thighs at all, so just some regular tight briefs. It’s mostly black+deep red, his favourite colour combo.

Vil – there he is, the underwear guru. He has all kinds of underwear and sometimes changes it multiple times per day depending on his activity: he wears seamless short briefs for yoga so it’s not visible through his leggings, but still gives him support, he wears longer boxer briefs for jogging so his thighs don’t rub against each other too much, he wears some other type for flying… his collection is expensive, high quality and very well organised… What was that? A thong? Of course he wears a thong sometimes, it looks hot. And lingerie too, when it’s appropriate. Come on now.

Rook – there he is, the man who used to wear underwear with holes in it and didn’t even care. Point at him, laugh at him, and then say thank you to Vil Schoenheit who took one look at this creature and said “I can fix him”. Anyways, nowadays Rook wears a pair of seamless boxer briefs that hug his body tightly but don't feel suffocating; he owns a bunch of these in different colours. He also owns a jockstrap, and finds it kind of functional, but it makes his butt too prominent, so he doesn't wear it. It’s for special occasions only...

Epel – he fought his mum for the right to buy himself some new cool underwear before coming to NRC (having colourful undies your mom bought you when you were 12 SUCKS!), but he didn’t even get to wear them much because Vil saw them and gave him a lecture about how this is the worst type of underwear he could wear (pure polyester, are you serious??), and that Epel doesn’t care about the well-being of his down-there at all. Long story short, Vil got him some red+purple boxer briefs for the regular wear (not too tight, very comfy!) + a couple of  black pairs for magift (longer ones?? Epel didn’t even know it existed). Epel was actually worried that he would get some stupid girly underwear, but wow these are… kind of nice. But he would never admit that the ones Vil got are much better!!

Idia – he usually wears the grey ones with triangles that STYX issues for its personnel. They are pretty comfy, and you can just grab a box and boom – you don’t have to think about your underwear ever again, EASY. But also Idia has some kind of childish loose boxers… with his favourite characters, of course. This isn’t just underwear, it’s also merch. Perfect for rewatching 300 episodes of your favourite anime.

Ortho – how much he wishes he could wear underwear…! But if we’re talking about real!Ortho, I think he would also like good ol’ regular loose boxers. But overall his underwear collection is less childish than Idia’s, at least because he has some Calvin Kleines.  And yes, of course it’s black and neon blue. He doesn’t really like the STYX ones because they make him sad, but he wears those from time to time because he wants to match with Idia.

Lilia – the moment he discovered funky underwear he was never the same. It’s the same thing he does with socks: he buys everything that seems fun, even if it ends up not being his size: he just gifts it away to younglings, so it’s all good! I think every Diasomnia boy has at least one pair of underwear that doesn’t match his style at all, because it was Lilia’s gift… anyways, Lilia either wears black ones with bright patterns (black + neon green+pink!), or something completely obnoxious. Nowadays he’s also thinking whether he could pull off something cute+sexy…

Silver – he wears whatever and doesn’t think about it twice, as long as it’s clean and has no holes in it. The majority of his underwear are pretty boring regular boxer briefs + just regular boxers that aren’t as tight. He also has one silly pair with blue and pink birdies… a gift from father, of course. He always smiles when he wears them.

Sebek – his default is black+green briefs; his thighs are getting too powerful, so he doesn’t like shorts-type underwear these days. But he does wear one lengthier pair – and it’s special equestrian underwear that has padding on the crotch. Sometimes the boy just wants some extra protection against rubbing okay… it’s not as much of a problem for the rest of the equestrian club boys for some reason.

Malleus – it’s clearly custom-made just for him: it’s black, made of high quality special type of silk + has beautiful lacing. Honestly, Malleus panties are a piece of art. I guess it’s like traditional Briar Valley type of design, but super extra fancy; he is the future King, after all. It’s hard to say if it’s comfy or not, but it looks quite dramatic. Malleus also has some underwear that is lengthier, almost like leggings. 

Bonus round!:

Crowley – doesn’t wear anything. Don’t tell anyone.

Crewel – a big variety, a lot of bold patterns, but his favourite pair is a part of black trunks with a white zebra print. Shocking, I know. He has some pretty sexy ones though, maybe even a thong.

Trein – granpa undies… grandpa undies.

Vargas – unfortunately, probably a jockstrap.

Sam – well wouldn’t you want to know? :)

Che’nya – he almost never wears underwear. And he flashes people. He is a very, very bad cat. He only wears underwear when he knows his pants are going to slide down because he doesn’t know how to use a belt properly, and people are going to see that he is wearing boxers with cartoon hedgehogs tickling each other in a weirdly sexual manner. Bad, bad cat.

Neige – pretty plain ones! Almost all of his underwear is either white or light blue. Some of them have silly prints, almost too cute for a guy… He gets tons of very cool expensive underwear for free as promo, but he donates the majority of them without even unpacking it. Thank you for your kindness, but people need undies more than Neige <3

Rollo – he is similar to Riddle, but I also think he would be that one kid who wears some priestly old-timey looking cotton shorts, because these are more traditional, and traditions are to be cherished. One could think that this is a part of his school’s uniform, but nah, Rollo is just a little weirdo… looks good on him though.

Fellow – I’m sorry, it’s probably kind of bad :( it used to be a decent pair of boxer briefs that he got when they suddenly got lucky enough with money, but now it’s well-worn and has some holes in it. It also used to be bright orange, but now it has a pale sort of peachy hue… he wants to get something new to wear, but whenever they get the money, clothes aren’t really a priority.

Gidel – his aren’t as bad because Fellow always wants Gidel to have something at least a little bit better than what he has, but Gidel’s pair of boxers is clearly too big for him. It’s pinned around his waist just so he doesn’t lose them… it has some guy’s name written on the butt part, and while Fellow finds it kind of depressing (maybe he remembers the guy he stole those from), Gidel thinks it’s pretty funny.

[aheroonahistorybookpage]

Okay, so Eddie Diaz sexuality headcanons and people's thoughts on him being queer-coded. I enjoy reading them.

I'm naive on a lot of the terms people use beyond the basics. So I do research them when I see them. Sometimes, there are abbreviations that I'm not sure what they refer to specifically, so they can be hard to research. When I think about the headcanons I've researched in regard to Eddie, sometimes I understand what people are meaning and why, and sometimes I don't. Honestly, it can change from one day to the next with the same headcanon. But I also get that you can be a combination.

But also general personality traits vs. queer headcanons vs. other emotions. (Ana breakup - Eddie wanting Christopher to have "normal things" and Eddie's feelings being the lowest priority vs. Eddie not being attracted to her vs. Eddie's panic attacks being related to ready-made families, noting that the previous conversation surrounding it mentioned Shannon's death - the last time he wore his suit was for his mothers funeral, etc.)

Like Demi Eddie, is it demisexual, demiromantic, or both but also what scenes give you the impressions, but are there contradictions? And the gay vs. bi vs. ? (honestly, I think Ryan & Devin's chemistry throws me through a loop on having him being gay over bi).

Also, I'm interested if people who think he's not straight (starting there because that's generally the baseline for TV unless indicated otherwise except that Bi Buck says he'd check out a hot guys ass and Eddie has checked out Buck's) think he knows if he's not straight, and if he has a some label (gay, bi, etc.) or if he has no idea or even a more in-depth opinion.

I don't know if I'm alone in this. I just want to learn.

Anyway, if you want, please explain your headcanons/ thoughts on this post or share links to explanations. But also, if you think a different way to someone else's comments, explain.

But please stay polite, everyone. I don't like people being upset.

I'll start with my basic opinion for now (and who knows, it'll probably change the more I learn)

He's at least attracted to men and women, I feel like we can agree he's somewhat checked Buck out and flirted with him (2x01 - the lip bite in the gym, 3x04, 3x09). Yes, Devin & Ryan's chemistry, but also the first time he meets Ana, Eddie awkwardly bumbles his way through that, staring at this attractive woman and Carla calling him out on it and the math date, as weird as people found it I think there was a bit of something there. The "not my type" thing, I can throw that back to him being married and not really wanting to explain that.

Whether I think he knows that he's attracted to guys, I flit between yes and no. With the yes, I feel like he'd know, but the conflict avoider in him is just like, "Nope, not going there, don't need the issues it could bring up with family and religion." Or we've got the general repression for either side. Personally, I think the first one would be such an interesting concept to explore.

[bettertwin1]

Hi, old follower here from before you had 100 followers. I've got a semi serious question for you.

When I first followed you, I got the impression that you were a RP blog, in the case where you would RP with your "brother" (bettertwin9000), so I followed the rules as such. But later on it seems that this blog is your persona? In terms of everything said to this blog is a personal question to you? It's a weird situation where people asking those intrusive questions make sense for a RP blog, but in a normal blog situation it makes it intrusive.

Tldr, I think many are confused if this is an RP blog or you having Leo as your persona, so can you confirm what this blog actually is?

OMG HI LONG TIME FOLLOWER!!

And, for the sake of things making a little bit of sense, as much as sense as we can manage, keep in mind that we have OSDD, we're a system-

PUTTING IT UNDER CUT CAUSE IT'S LONG 😅

At the start of the blog <- in which we were advertising it as a roleplay blog, it was being run by our host and partially by me though I had no clue what I was doing at the time and bettertwin9000 was being run by our partner <- (which btw, made for some strange asks)

We continued advertising it as a roleplay even when we began suspecting and having full breakdowns over the idea of being a system due to some little things and some big things and lots of research and therapy and blah blah BUT we kept going back on it cause tbh DID is a hard thing to accept and we didn't want it <- still don't

SO now I was trying to run the blog more all the while trying to keep us grounded, IGNORING the possibility of DID and thinking, nah, this is just a really bad cause of delusions and we NEED to get reality checked NOW.

But I ALREADY KNEW i'm not REALLY Leo from rottmnt, but I am him, I was formed from that guy, created? Idk. He made me in his own image type reference audio. WOW IM NOT EXPLAINING ANYTHING 😭😭 did I mention we have a tendency to overexplain <- but specifically for me in the case of explaining things that are hard to explain, ANYWHIZZLE.

We kept going back and forth, confirming and denying the conclusion "we have osdd" cause that's terrifying and while this was happening I was still trying to force us to post and interact and involve ourself in arcs for the sake of distraction from EVERYTHING happening irl and the blog kind of made it worse but in a light hearted way cause suddenly the asks became really gross, and I felt really gross.

Sure, maybe someone who was roleplaying Leonardo would have no trouble answering asks about dead relatives or near death experiences or villains that have physically harmed you and your 'siblings' or about my crippling inability to speak about feelings and whatever else people diagnosed me with on here but I was having trouble answering it, I was getting uncomfortable and I was feeling genuinely overwhelmed because everything that definitely would be great material for a roleplay account was making me just feel, bad. <- which wasn't great considering at the time, feeling bad was not something i could have been affording to do

SO at some point, I started putting boundaries, didn't explain why, just continued under the guise of hey, roleplay guy here, the intruvsive invasive asks about my family and my mental health and my anatomy is making me want to die so please stop andbonly ask fun stuff like idk, if i put salt in donnie's coffee sometimes and everyone was like, yes leonardo in unison.

Then I slowly started getting more adamant on pushing the narrative that I am LITERALLY Leo from the show cause pushing that seemed to really help with the questions, and then the roleplay blog became more like. A personal blog for some dude who happened to be a ninja turtle alter and it'd unfortunately gotten so out of hand that explaining this now kind of made us even more exhausted cause oh man, we might get fake claimed huh <- we had worse things to deal with, internet drama didn't need to be added to this.

Anyway, if you read through all that junk, i'm sorry 😭, but i think it helps explain why the impression of the blog is so confusing cause it was being run by two ppl, a host and an alter who were constantly trying NOT to be those things until pretty recently when we started accepting the fact that we have Osdd

SO TIMELINE.

The blog starts off as an rp blog by our host and I unbeknownst to us both

The blog is fun and we start gaining traction

We also start gaining more mental health problems and have a full breakdown multiple times on many different social medias

We push through to cope

We talk to the other blog runners who are systems <- (Mikey, Raph and at the time when their account was apart of this, April) and they kindly answer and guide us through some things

We start adding boundaries for my sake

We talk to other systems on other social media and they help us with more stuff

We talk to our therapist

We do a ton of research on top of old research we'd apparently already done before <- suddenly we have a long document with so much information

We tell no one about the discovery when we start accepting the possibility

More funny stuff ensue and personal life things happen <- #ONLYTHEREALONESKNOW!

The only announcement I ever make that i'm an alter are one off comments in tags or answers that I never address again until I make an intro post that says I'm an alter in a system

The blog is what now?

The blog is still a roleplay account. Sometimes, canceled arcs that we would have done would have been considered roleplay <- a canceled christmas arc. But usually, this is just a blog. Like, this is just a blog I use to entertain people and to get some of my thoughts out like a singlet would. It's both i guess, it's whatever I want it to be and whatever you guys consider it to be.

The blog is just, my blog, I don't know how else to explain it 😅😅

Also, Bettertwin9000 was pretty much going through the same thing at the time and fun fact, he is actually my "brother" cause he's a Donnie alter <- (yay!)

Shoutout to the host who has their own blogs that they never really post on! couldn't have done it without you! <- and the many kind individuals who gave us their research material and links and answered our questions and stuck w/ us through the most confusing part of OUR LIFE

Srry again if this didn't answer your question like at all by the way, i THINK it at least explained some things but you know 😭 SORRY IDK

[jsraven7]

Gods and Signs

I’ve seen a lot of people and posts lately talking about signs from the Gods, and saw a lot of it around when I first started up. Especially on things like witchtok. So let’s talk about it! Warning, this is my personal opinion and how I have been taught over the years.

Any God can give a sign to any person. But there are diverging paths with signs.

First, I wanted to talk about what retains the biggest focus on Godly signs that I’ve seen, and that’s witchcraft. In my practice and experience, working with a God and worshipping them are two different things (though not exclusive! I do both all of the time). I believe you need absolutely no signs or communication to worship a God. Definitely not. What would be the point in that? They accept worship from everyone!

But, it’s a little different when working with a God. Working with a God is something that comes with a lot of witchcraft practices, and is also prevalent in some people’s worship (not all, though). When you wish to work directly with a God, it is polite and rite of passage to reach out to the God, or send out an intention that you wish for Them to reach out to you. You will either receive signs or you won’t—it can be as small as getting overwhelming thoughts of working with Them, or as big as Them sending Their sacred animal to you.

You cannot make a God work with you, so if you do not get a sign or confirmation, most people will just continue on.

Now, that being said, in terms of worship you absolutely do not need a sign. Signs can absolutely be given! But you do not need one to worship a God. If that helps any beginners in their stress over receiving signs.

Witchtok has made a huge deal over receiving signs, and that has panicked/stressed a lot of beginners. In fact, witchtok makes a huge deal out of a lot of stuff to do with the Gods that freaks beginners out a bit. I would know, I was one of them. But you only need to worry about signs in regards to whether you should start something when you are attempting to establish a working relationship with the God or want to incorporate Them into a craft.

All that being said, this is just how I was taught and my belief, so some things I’ve said may be outdated or different than others’ beliefs. But I just wanted to provide a little breathing room for the new Hellenic Polytheists I’ve seen around getting nervous about signs. Everything is okay! Breathe! I know a lot of people can make things seem strict or scary, but I promise you as long as you’re respectful, it’s very hard to really mess up or anger anyone.

Rambling over, but I am always open to questions from beginners who are nervous. I was not given a space to ask questions at the beginning of my practice, and that caused a lot of stress, panic, and errors. I am a firm believer in researching for yourself, but sometimes we just need that human connection, and someone with experience to just tell us we aren’t fucking up. I want to be that space, since I did not have one. I will answer whatever I can.

Khairete 🖤

Edit, because I forgot to state this: I don’t really have a problem with witchtok. I’m still on there a lot of the time. There’s just a weird trend with some things on witchtok when it comes to Gods/Deity work. Not trying to cause any fights!

[teeth--thief]

Photos of Lyonyd (Leonid?…) Toptunov? I wouldn’t mind rambling on him, also.

- Rodka

I deliberately saved this ask for last (sort of). As a treat for myself and as a threat for everyone else ♡ And for @ur-favorite-basil-enthusiast since he was also interested in seeing The Collection.

I'll have to split this into a few parts - dreaful, I know! - because I can only add 10 pictures to one post while on mobile =( I'll keep reblogging with additional pictures till I run out of things to share. Subscribe for more insane content in the future and don't forget to click that bell icon to...

Part 1

He had manifested to me in a dream when I first started researching Chernobyl, have I ever mentioned that? Well, he has. Which was truly an anomaly because I almost never have any dreams at all... but about that some other time, perhaps.

I am going to put the pictures of him under the cut so nobody gets jumpscared by my Collection of Five Billion White Guy Pictures. And I'll also include some relevant information! Or as relevant as I can make it, at least.

Just to be clear (and safe): I found all of these out in the wild, on da internet. I am, however, pretty sure that at least the collage of his pics from uni times is from @/toptunovleonid on Instagram. So, just to be very clear: all credit for at least that goes to her.

Semi-chronologically, his pictures go like this:

Ignoring that one picture that is barely visible and out of frame in a few pictures of the photo album it's in, because he looks about 10 there and I feel slightly weird about sharing it specifically.

We're in... Tallinn, middle school number 11!

Second boy from the left in the second picture is him. That is he. He who was 15 then. And a 16 year old Lyonya in the left picture, of course.

From this time, one of his classmates remembers him as follows: At school he was quiet, unnoticeable, very shy. I remember he was always hanging out with younger kids. He was chubby. They'd now say he was a "nerd". Alright, we get it, he was a sweet child... Teen? Both? Or was he like this all his life? Either way, please stop before I die from all that sugar...

He's (10th grade) the guy leading the little girl (1st grade). His shapeless hair has charmed me. What's his hair routine and will it work on my curls? Mhm, didn't think so. And first in the second row from the bottom in the small pictures, in case you can't recognise his face yet.

As a bonus - his school certificate from the school in Tallinn he attended until graduating in 1977:

The grades were from 2 (you didn't pass with that one, so that's an F) to 5 (an A, I suppose?). So as you can see, he certainly studied well. What a nerd (affectionately).

Uni territory now! Moscow calling 📞 or, rather, Obninsk and the MEPhI

If you weren't born in any of the USSR countries during The Soviet Times, it'll come as a surprise to you but the students had mandatory... field... work... classes...? if you can call them that. They had them digging potatoes and what not. Nothing screams socialist spirit like making uni students do free labour in the field, I guess?

Pictures with his uni girlfriend, how cuuute! (And Sasha Korol hanging from the roof in the background... for reasons unknown)

Lyonya pretending to drive a combine harvester. And next to him, obviously, Sasha Korol. When I first saw this picture, I thought he was on some kind of a scaffolding but alas - it's one of those old beasts, like our Bizon. But that's not a Bizon because those had roofs. Nobody here cares for USSR combines talk - not even me - let's move on.

Not too sure when these two are from but they look uni enough to me - probably from the very beginning and sometime closer to the end, judging by his stache doing significantly better...

Mandatory military service because a REAL MAN in the USSR needed to know how to shoot a gun, obviously. Even when that meant military service interrupted your uni for a short while. I say that as if no other countries before or after had mandatory army time... don't question it, I'm doing a bit.

Lyonya is second in top row in the picture on the left and third from the left in the top row in the other pic. Korol is there, too, he's fourth from the left in the top row in the first picture and second from the right in the bottom row in the other picture.

[redpiperfox]

red it is i

🎱🛼🍄🪐🔪🌿!

ELLO ELLO ELLO! :D

🎱 ⇢ post your AO3 total stats

On this lovely last Friday in May~

🛼 ⇢ describe your latest wip with five emojis

...I am constantly working on multiple projects at the same time lol SO I will give you five emojis for five wips I'm cycling thru!:

🐺❄️💨🏡💭

🥻💃🌩🤵‍♂️🏰

🕷🦸‍♀️🕸🤒🦹‍♀️

👶👧👦🌽👾

👗🥻📸🎀🖌

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

Ooooooh I dunno if you want me to do this one 😅 Some friends can tell you-- my skzitzy headcanons go WILD lololol

Okay um... ah! Chan had mentioned previously how he's close to Yeji because she asks him about a lot of "leader" stuff, and Yeji mentions (and models lol) how if she isn't really good at something or has no interest in it, she's really not good at it, and she had no initial interest in the Itzy plan to be leader. So I headcanon that between Chaeryeong shouldering a lot of official leader things (canon: she would have been leader if she wasn't on the maknae end, and she's been the first to go do solo PR for the group), Chan has literally given Yeji a Do What I Do policy, and Yeji has done that (there's a lot of little ways in which she relates to fans and tries to approach things that are very Chan-like, and I say that because Chan does things in a very atypical way to kpop XD)

....I'll stop with that one haha

🪐 ⇢ name three good things going on in your life right now

Only three!!!!!

1. I have gotten time to write and paint post graduation!

2. I have a scheduled date for license exam and have been able to study pretty diligently, which is unexpected bc I really thought it would be harder post graduating to get back into the books haha

3. All the animals outside our house have been so funny haha they're endless amusement to me, they're absolutely sitcom material lol

🔪 ⇢ what's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

.... I shoudn't answer-- OKAY WELL the LEAST weird thing is when I watched coleydoesthings' mini research vid on a/b/o history and stuff? Only... I don't really usually write a/b/o... 😅

I've looked up the usual-- murdee things, random chemical irregularities, space physics, kpop idol bdays to make sure I'm keeping everyone in approximate age-order, kpop names bc I only know them by stage name, niche interviews, drowning scenes, torture scenes.. I have a couple of my fav angsty movie clips and/or kpop moments that'll get me in a very niche mood I sometimes need to write? Idk if that counts XD

🌿 ⇢ give some advice on writer's block and low creativity

EMBRACE IT! And try to see what it's there for? Sometimes, it's a period of consuming media, and doing "fic research" in enjoying storytelling styles and methods you wouldn't have considered in your muse-inspired hazes. Sometimes, it's a good handbrake your brain has to keep from being burnt out by your hobby! But sometimes, if it is a thing that really isn't being shaken off and you'd like it to be-- challenge yourself. Write even when it's uncomfortable. Have a dump AU that's nonsensical and crude and serves only to work the muscle again. Ask other people for random tags and ideas to give your brain something new to work with. If bullet pointed ideas are all you can do, do that! Just keep writing, and somewhere the writing muscle will remember how to do it's thing, or grow into something stronger, and the muse will be working through you again 😊

[cookinguptales]

Look... I understand as much as any woman with a chronic illness how frustrating it is to be dismissed by your doctors. I've been going to see doctors about weird mystery illnesses for over twenty years now. I am more than used to being dismissed for my weight or my sex or my hormone levels or whatever else. I will never forget one of my doctors privately taking my mother aside when I was sixteen and telling her that she needed to be taking me to a therapist, not a medical specialist, because it was all clearly in my head. That first diagnosis took ten years. I get it. It's frustrating. It sucks.

That said, going to a research hospital or being part of a research program isn't like some easy magic bullet that's going to mean suddenly you're cured. It often involves a lot of extremely painful trial and error (that occasionally makes you much worse before it makes you better -- if it makes you better) and an absolutely brutal degree of dehumanization. You're often looked at as data or a puzzle to be solved rather than a human being, and being honest with you, I'm still dealing with a lot of the psychological effects of growing up that way.

(ETA: IT'S ALSO VERY EXPENSIVE SOMETIMES so that's something else to worry about.)

So uh. If someone makes a vent post about yet again having medical symptoms so strange that your doctor refers you to a research program, maybe do not comment on that post talking about how lucky they are.

That's. That's just a request from me.

[hell-drabbles]

(tbh, I don't even have the angel cards cuz I'm broke lol🙃, but I'll tell a few thing's what I noticed on other people's post about them either the comics, message's, or stories and theories)

Let's start with Rafael, the dude is like that one insecure kid in the family that always get compared to their other siblings or cousins, Gabriel is the messenger, Michael is the right hand, Rafael wanted to be acknowledged as something, he sees god as kind and benevolent being and being too merciful so he wanted to be the one who punishes evil for him because he loves god and wanted to understand him in some degree, so he judges based on his beliefs wether they're innocent or not and just like other Angel's, his views are always on god and wouldn't acknowledge the God's other creations because he sees them unworthy of God's recognition, bro is already insane (and God didn't even reprimanded this type behavior idk) and had spiraled further since God disappear when peepaw Solomon died, so ever since then he sees all of his decisions and other forms of punishment as a will for/from God in hopes he will come back one day and see his work.

So, the Christmas event happened and most of us know about the chastity belts they wear as to keep them pure for god, and out all of the three seraphim, Rafael is the only one that had his successfully and actually taken off by Raon (that's what they say) and by the time our little rara came back to heaven, bro had his post nut happiness because no joke that the brother actually thought he had ascended into a higher rank than Michael and Gabriel after he experience his first nut (since Lucifer said that Angel's engaged in ecstasies and eventually stop before they climax) Rafael was in a good mood back in heaven during those days that he scared most of the other Angel's.

(that's all bro, I'm new to your blog and love your raon trash talks, sorry English is not my native language btw, you also get a follow, I'll still go a couple of research for the other seraphim)

[ and also After reading a couple of your Lucifer x Companion works I'm hooked, Raon is so rotten to the point I think he wouldn't stop even if ever one day Companion gets married to Lucifer and Raon would just insist that its for the betterment of hell lol bye]

Funny you should send me Raphael of all angels, I was actually starting to write about him. So that's how he's like huh? That's funny. I am going around and reading what I can find about him, especially his card lines because I get the strongest grasp of a character by the way they're talking. And wow, he's a delusional one, ain't he? Also, I take an interest in his relationship with Heaven, since it's pretty clear he has no love for the others that live there, and if need be, will burn that place to the ground if it aligns with his views on God. What a weirdo.

Haaa, my brain has been stuck on how the seraphim would take in interest in the Embittered Companion, and how that would descend into some good old obsession. I know for certain that they didn't take any interest in the Embittered Companion. It's only after spending time in Heaven do things start to descend. Of course, I naturally want each of their obsessions to be distinct from one another. Like, how I imagine Gabriel to take issue with anyone who keeps a feather of the Embittered Companion to themselves, regardless if they were demon or angel. And Raphael, he has a weird sense of when the Embittered Companion is about to become lucid, so he tends to be there and just, stares. And sometimes laughs for seemingly no reason. He's creeeeepy.

Michael, eh, I don't have anything on him right now. Maybe later.

And yes, yes, Ra-on is certainly a rotten little thing, because holy hell man, incel behavior is no joke and that shit is extremely hard to weed out of a person. So, Ra-on is going to be a frustrating character to deal with, but he'll get better eventually. It's just going to be a rather painful process because of how much he's gotta unpack. Thank you for liking it all!

[paintbrushnebula]

That Would Be Beautiful

Foreword: SO! This is a Tangled one shot, its a very small part of this Tangled AU that I've had a lot of ideas and concepts and plot stuff accumulated in my notes app and in my sketchbooks for. I've been calling it "Rapunzel: Year One" for fun (I might just keep calling it that for now), since it's supposed to chronicle Rapunzel's first year out of the Tower, navigating her new responsibilities, her new relationships, and what she wants out of life.

This scene is of Rapunzel trying to learn more about Gothel, what she did when she wasn't at the tower, what her life was like. The idea is that Rapunzel's trying to find some way to prove to herself that Gothel could be humanized, that she wasn't "all that bad" or that there was some sort of explanation for why Gothel treated Rapunzel the way she did.

It's very small, just 1k~ words, it's incomplete and there's more to the scene but I just needed to post something for now bc I think my blog has been a tad revealing about my tendency to abandon personal projects and just leave WIPs and never follow up on them and I just didn't want it to seem like I was doing that again

Ive never written Tangled before omg I dont know if I met my ambitions here pls pls pls give me your thoughts or criticisms they are welcome

~

It felt ironic in a way that really depressed Rapunzel, how four weeks and a haircut ago, she had all the time in the world with nothing to really do. Now, there was so much that could be done, with what sometimes felt like no time at all.

This was one of those times. 

Rapunzel’s eyes spent more time looking at the clock on the castle library wall than at the page of her chemistry book. Now time was spilling away quick, and any moment now, the pleasant click clack of Lady Desdemona’s pompadour heels would reverberate off the library walls, a much appreciated warning to hide away her research before her tutor dragged her away to the next lesson.

Rapunzel knew Lady Desdemona probably wouldn’t think much of the stack of chemistry, engineering and geography books and loose folios sprawled about, all populated with equations and notes, as well as a few quick pencil sketches of imagined, cuddly moments between her and her beloved. Y'know, for emotional support.

At least, Rapunzel was sure the governess wouldn’t become privy on what Rapunzel had actually been at the library researching. 

It was weird to be so concerned about what the governess would think if she caught Rapunzel trying to teach herself how to find out how old a cloak was and where it's been, but Desdemona was so invested in Rapunzel’s business. Always asking her questions about what she was doing, and why she was doing it. Always taking a moment during lessons to ask if Rapunzel needed a break. Asking how she felt about a royal event when one was coming up. If it made her stressed, if she wanted to talk about it. Always analyzing her behavior like she was some doctor assigned to study Rapunzel’s mental health. Reporting every symptom, every weird quirk back to her parents. 

Rapunzel made a mental note to read up on Lady Desdemona, to see if she had any history in dealing with people's mental health (Rapunzel remembered reading that that specific profession had a name...psychiatry?). She guessed her parents were sensible to   hire a governess to tutor her in the ways of princesshood, who could also ensure Rapunzel was emotionally well-adjusted to her new life. 

She knew she should feel grateful. They’ve gone through the trouble of finding a teacher who could help Rapunzel properly find her footing. Sheknew it wasn’t fair to be frustrated.

It wouldn’t have made Rapunzel so uncomfortable if this process hadn’t been so revealing about what her parents truly thought of her: that she was a damaged girl who needed serious help.

Maybe I am. 

After 6 days of meticulous research in between Desdemona’s lessons, Rapunzel was feeling pretty confident in her ability to date the sediment she picked out of Gothel’s cloak. It alleviated the nagging apprehension and doubt that'd built up in her stomach to learn that humanity had discovered a way to find out the age of an object. Humans had the power to uncover the stories behind relics of eras so long ago and tell them to the world. It made her all cozy knowing that nothing could ever really be forgotten, because smart people were just that curious. That's amazing.

Mmph, delicious. Science is like food for the mind.

Well, technically that's fish. Also eggs.

Rapunzel just needed a proportional counter to count the carbon, as well an actual microscope to spot any pollen or exotic soils that might trace to any regions beyond Corona's borders. She was lucky to even manage the delicate process of plucking sediment from the cloak’s wool with her old magnifying glass. A gift for her eleventh birthday, a relic from a phase when she took deep interest in the insects that’d cluster at the banisters that stretched from wall to wall high above the tower’s floor. 

One of the few things she took with her before leaving that life behind.

At this point, there was nothing more Rapunzel needed to know to enact her experiment. But she didn't own the proper equipment to enact it. Rapunzel didn't even think about how she'd access that type of equipment. She hasn't met any scientists or engineers yet. 

Where do scientists live? There's gotta be, like, a big fancy lab where they work somewhere in the city, right? She'd ask someone, but she wasn't ready for any follow up questions they might ask. 

She knew it'd be so much easier to just ask her parents for the equipment, but what if they were curious about her activity? 

Rapunzel was just too paranoid about anyone finding out about the cloak. 

She was on her own. 

Suddenly Rapunzel noticed how her finger was seemingly stuck running itself in a lulling circle over the leathery skin of the chemistry book's cover. Tough, coarse, yet so lulling, like the palms of Eugene's hands. It soothed away all the pollutant thoughts, leaving alone one singular thing she wondered about. 

It'd be so easy to close the book, lock the cloak away under her bed and take a nap on Eugene's chest. At this hour he was probably still sleeping. He wouldn't stir if she snuck into his room and plopped face down on his chest and get lost. Forget the cloak. Forget Desdemona. Forget her lessons. Forget being a princess. It sounds so easy. Easy and right. 

It made her weak just thinking about how easy it would be to have peace. 

But there was so much Rapunzel didn’t know, and she’s just so confused. The thrill mixed with dread at there being answers to where it all went wrong, answers she might never know if she didn’t search for them, was stinting her growth into her new life. It was getting in the way of her progress too much. 

If she could get a date from the dirt in that cloak, maybe trace a few places of origin, she could make a historical record of Gothel's earlier life. Before the tower. Find a trail and follow it back to its roots. What she'd lived through. Where she was from. 

Did she have family? 

To be continued...