#really autistic

[constablequodo]

Why is it that the moment I write about Laszlo, the length of the fic becomes more than my one and only multi chapter work ever???

[prettyboythings-blog]

Venting

I can't love him, I want to and I do, but I cant love him the way people do. Its not romantic and trying to make it romantic makes me shut down and want to just go no contact. I love him but I cant do this. I'm also asexual and I wish I can show him love through that way but I cant. And I don't like long term physical contact. I cant stand it. I'm not great with communication. I was never great with people. Does this mean I'm destined to be alone forever? I like to be alone and do my own thing if I can I probably would never leave my room. If only I can be around people. I love him but I cant stand this. I cant stand this empty feeling when I'm around him and when I'm alone. I love you I truly do. But I think My depression is taking over. For now at least probably. I love you, I'm sorry.

[cheshiretheblack]

Does it make sense that when I'm sick I can't mask my autistic traits, and if I try it gets harder to get better ? Asking for a friend (not)

[autisticthings]

Autism: is a changing tolerance normal?

Something that hardly anyone around me understands is that people.. change. everything is fluid, including autism.

One day I'll be fine with the electricity humming, the next day I won't. people don't understand that.

When I first got diagnosed it felt like I was "acting more autistic" meaning I was really just unmasking*. I started letting go and letting myself cover my ears whenever something hurt them (way better than standing there and taking it tbh). but people around me thought I was either faking it or being overdramatic, or just plain weird.

If you've experienced this, honestly, you're not alone. it's okay if one day you can be at a club and the next day you can't stand even just the small hum in your walls.

Educate the allistics** around you. Your sensory input will be more intense some days.

If you are feeling more overwhelmed one day, then turn off the lights, put on some music you like, let yourself wiggle. Give your brain a reset day. If you don't, you will be exhausted. and yes, it is normal.

---

*unmasking - masking is where you mask your autistic traits, unmasking is where you don't ignore things that bother you because you're autistic, and instead accommodate for them

**allistics - non-autistic people

[torisaysyeet]

Hm yes today I will indulge in Zombie/Analogue Horror MLP content, surely there will be no consequences

[sillyfeelings]

Puppyboy behavior is so nice for the autism drain, like yeh I'd like to be muzzled then I don't have to talk and can go mute, yeh I wanna be harnessed because the pressure across my skin feels so relaxing, not to mention the fact I get to let go and not really think too hard about much of anything

[z4g-3us]

i think ppl will enjoy these so im sharing the experience of studying a tbh creature in the wild.... fascinating creatur.......

[kamuucab]

In light of recent revelations...

[ancient-reverie]

a moment of silence for all us disabled ones who had to watch each of their friends move on with their lives without you and get jobs, go to school, have partners come and go, get engaged and move house etc.

shout out to my fellow struggling people who are still sitting in the same bedroom they grew up in. the ones who can't get a job, can't make new friends, can't find a partner or partners, can't move house and can't go to school.

I hope one day we can all find someone to at least sit with us in our rooms. I see you and I understand... and I'm sorry we can't be that person for each other

[oilith]

Don't laugh at people or mock people who are "childish". People are allowed to like things that are considered "childish". Toys, kids cartoons, anything like that can be a valuable source of comfort for the people who like them. It's important to have things in life that make you happy, and without them it gets miserable. Wether that thing is stuffed animals or cooking or writing lyrics, what's important is that others don't ridicule and belittle them for it. There shouldn't be such judgement for the things that make people happy.

[xitsensunmoon]

My first ever comic con! And first cosplay too. Of course it's gonna be my boy :] Ramblings about the process are under the cut(Let me know if?? You would want me to elaborate with process images for any of the steps?)

The costume took me forever to make, as I've never done any machine sewing, sculpting, fabric dying or spray painting before but learning all of these was so fucking fun!! I never realised just how many different skills go into making a cosplay but it was so worth it!!!

Almost all of the clothes(except the hat) were purchased first as bases, but all of the detailing was added by me. All of the fabric used was originally just scraps that I was given for free so I needed to learn how to dye and dye all of the stars, they were originally white.

The sewing machine was its own beast that brought me tons of frustration from the lack of skill and knowledge (it was devastating to find out that 95% of fuck ups were my fault and not the machine's lmao). But as a result, a hat sewn from scratch, all of the fur trims, embroidery on the corset, stars and the collar(which is very hard to see on the pictures unfortunately) was all added manually. The stars and the stripes(on the back of the cape) were attached using heat-and-bond adhesive (I WISH I knew about such thing just when I started working on this. It would save me so much time and nerves.)

Then I found out about polymorph(mouldable plastic) and it has become the next thing I wanted to learn, to sculpt the claws and the fangs(yes, they're handmade jfksjs). The claws I then primed and painted in trillion coats because I wasn't satisfied with the colour of the spray paint. The fangs I moulded to my own teeth and then stained with tea to match the colour of my teeth :)c

As for makeup, I used Mehron Paradise water activated paints. At first I wanted to try to save money and bought myself Snazaroo instead, which unfortunately turned out to be a waste. Snazaroo didn't hold on my face for longer than 2 hours, cracking and peeling awfully. Mehron on the other hand survived 11 hours of me smiling, talking, emoting and such and didn't even crease at the smile lines(I'm actually shocked about that). It obviously works like any other makeup which means your skin texture and wrinkles won't go anywhere but Mehron's elasticity pleasantly surprised me. It did obviously smear from sweat and saliva(if you're eating and licking your lips) but if you don't touch the skin it just dries again, self setting. But if it's dry it's fully smear-proof. Highly recommend!

And last but not least, I've decided against painting my hands as it was very risky that I will stain everything I touch at the smallest hint of sweat. So instead I got myself gloves-tights(? Not sure how they're called but it's made from the same fabric as tights) and painted them with normal acrylic paint(did you know you could dye fabric with acrylic paint? I personally didn't), then heat set with an iron and voilà, they're reusable, my hands are not stained after an exhausting day and I don't stain everything I touch. It worked wonderfully which honestly was a surprise as I was really sceptical that acrylic paint will somehow stay in place.

I think this whole thing took me minimum of 6 months with big-big breaks for my school and life in general. But I'm really proud! This project taught me so many new skills and I couldn't have been happier about learning new knowledge, even if it sucked to fail in the meantime.

Everyone at the con was really nice and gave me a large confidence boost even tho it was my first time and I had no idea what I was doing. Taking photos with other people was really awkward/new for me as I hate cameras so I really had no idea how to pose/behave in front of one. But that's okay I think. This whole experience definitely made me want to do this again, so I think that will come with experience. Thank you for reading this far, hope you enjoyed this little summary :)

[macaro-mochi]

Come watch dungeon meshi we have a (seemingly) typical white autistic man who doesn't understand social norms, an autistic man of colour who overcompensates for social deficits by being too good at social norms (while still struggling socially), and we even have the "grew up autistic but also Asian so I have a very good understanding of cultural and social norms but I still struggle socially" variety of autistic man.

[prettyboythings-blog]

Dam I just realized I don't make eye contact. Thought I did tbh.. But like now I'm hyper aware that I don't and can't.

Plus it's easier for me to read lips to catch what you are saying but still.

Its like wow for me

[time-woods]

EMOTIONAL WIN ! ! the bug lets his emotions make decisions for once !

[shadow0-1]

First meet

[deecotan]

anyway here's wavewave