#see how that video is only pulled up or mentioned when people speak about favorism. its like barely anyone gives a shit that

[thefanficmonster]

Casual

Ranboo x Reader (Female)

Warnings: None, unless talking about the future counts

Genre: FLUFF, Humor, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: Following the arrival of the dreadful invitation to his cousin’s wedding Ranboo turns to the only cover-up he can think of to keep his still-single status hidden from his family.

Requested by Anon. Hi darling! Thank you so much for your wonderful request! I’m so glad you sent your idea to me and I’m so glad you were my first official Ranboo request. I’m really sorry it’s taken me so long to write it but I still hope you’ll come across it and read it! Love, Vy ❤

“Heyyy, so Y/N, I have a favor to ask you...um yeah, call me back, it’s awkward sending it via voicemail. Bye“

Huh - that’s the first thought that goes through my head when I listen to the voicemail left after a missed call from my best friend Ranboo. The favors he usually asks for consist of requesting assistance for his videos in which I also appear with a mask and sunglasses to keep the brand running. I genuinely have nothing against my face being shown but when I think about it, I’m honestly a bit glad people can’t identify me.

Anyways, back to the favors, Ranboo is no stranger to asking me for them but they’ve never been considered too awkward for a voicemail which is why I’m no slightly concerned. I’ve been swamped with work for school and studies for the graduation finals for the past two weeks and it seems like I’ll never get on top of it and I know Ranboo’s been in a similar situation too, so maybe he needs help with that? He’s not used to asking help for school stuff, he sometimes even has a hard time accepting it when I openly offer it to him.

I eventually sigh, decide that playing this guessing game will not get me anywhere and settle on giving him a call as I make my way home from the gym with my legs barely putting up with the task of carrying me around.

He picks up on the second ring.

“Hey! Wh-...“

“Would you pretend to be my girlfriend for my cousin’s wedding next weekend?!“

My legs take that opportunity to stop moving in the middle of the sidewalk which is luckily void of any people at the moment. It’s not my fault my body’s first reaction was to freeze up at the question that came flying at me like an out-of-control jet, almost as though he’s been dying to say it and get it over with.

“Um...run that by me again please, I think I misunderstood.“ I say, blinking blankly as though awoken from a fever dream. No, actually as though I’m IN a fever dream right now.

“Ok, now that the cat’s out of the bag, wanna grab some coffee and talk about it face-to-face. I need to see your facial expressions to gauge what response to expect.“ He says, the previous nervousness gone and his voice calm as regularly once again.

I’m this close to face-palming but I squeeze my eyes tightly shut and bring myself to utter a reply, “Our usual spot. Be there in ten minutes.”

                                                             *  *  *

“No freaking way.“ I shake my head, folding my arms over my chest as I lean back in my seat in the booth we picked when we arrived. Good thing I got an iced coffee cause even a hot one would’ve gone cold by now considering I haven’t yet taken the time to have even a sip of it. I’ve been too busy listening to the long and short of the explanation and begging speech Ranboo probably made last night to try and convince me to agree to this nonsense. “Dude, we’ve been friends since middle school-...“

“Exactly! Who else was I gonna ask?“ He cuts me off, pleading gaze meeting my unimpressed one.

I huff before continuing my previous statement, “We’ve been friends since middle school so you know my opinion on weddings.” I put extra emphasis on the word ‘opinion’, giving him the clear hint at the distaste I’ve expressed on the topic multiple times before.

“And you know we’re on the same page there but there’s no way I can avoid going unless someone kidnaps me.“ He too now gets in the same stance as me, his coffee forgotten too.

I can’t help but snort out a little laugh, “I’d be more than happy to kidnap you considering the other option is far less appealing to me.“

He, of course, rolls his eyes at me as though he didn’t offer to do the same thing so I could avoid an exam but anyways. “So you’re gonna choose to fake a kidnapping that has the potential of landing you in jail over coming to eat some great food and maybe even have some fun at a wedding with your best friend? I’m hurt.“ He says, frowning to cover up the smile that’s fighting its way onto his face.

Now it’s my turn to roll my eyes, “I’d be kidnapping you, dummy...” I cut myself off to let out a long sigh and calm down before I go off at him. His smirk isn’t helping me much with the task either. I’ve known Ranboo long enough to know he’ll eventually convince me and he’s known me long enough to know how to do that exactly. With that in mind, there’s really no point in getting so worked up and wasting my energy. And so, despite my own rationality, I cave. “Fine, but I’m not staying the whole wedding.“

His eyes immediately light up and almost makes me feel the compromise was worth it. Almost. I mean, when you’ve been best friends with someone for so long, seeing them happy is worth more to you than your own comfort sometimes.

And he knows it too. Which is exactly why he outstretches his hand for me to shake and says: “Just one dance and you’re free to go. Deal?”

I take his hand without hesitations. That’s a better offer than I could’ve ever imagined. “Damn straight it’s a deal.“

                                                            *  *  *

“How long until you kick the heels off?“ Ranboo asks, bringing me a non-alcoholic cocktail and sitting down next to me.

I take a sip and giggle, “You kidding? I already kicked them off and replaced them with flats. I need mobility if we dance. They also lower the risk of me severing off a toe of yours if I step on you on accident.”

He laughs, clinking his glass against mine before he gets a bit more serious, “By the way, thanks for handling my family’s attack so well. I know it might’ve been a bit much but you handled it like a pro. Still, I’m sorry on their behalf.”

I shake my head and wave my hand dismissively, “Don’t mention it. I’d probably react the same way if my brother or cousin brought a date to an important family event like this.” I instinctively turn to look in the direction of where the majority of his family has gathered around, chatting with guests, smiling brightly. It’s hard not to immediately take a liking towards these people. They’ve been a second family to me ever since Ranboo and I started hanging out so I completely understand why they were so shocked to see me in the role of his ‘girlfriend’.

“I’ll tell my parents the truth later, our extended family is the ones I wanted to fool to be perfectly honest.“ He looks around as do I and we catch more than a few pairs of eyes fixated on us that turn away when they realize they’ve been spotted, “Mission accomplished by the looks of it.“

I chuckle. I’ve never felt so comfortable at a wedding before. I don’t feel stressed nor anxious despite knowing that there’s quite the number of eyes on me and there are whispers going around about my ‘relationship’ with Ranboo. It’s oddly calming and relaxing to be surrounded by some familiar and some unfamiliar faces. This cocktail is pretty great too.

Speaking of which, if it had any alcohol in it I’d blame it for the decision I’m about to make but this one’s entirely on me: I tap Ranboo with one hand while taking out my phone with the other. “If we’re already the talk of the wedding, let’s give them something to talk about.“ I say as I put up my phone, pretending to be taking a selfie leaning in to give him a kiss on the cheek.

When I pull away I can clearly see that he’s still processing what just happened. I can’t help but burst out in a fit of laughter as I reach out to wipe the lipstick stain I left on his cheek. He looks like a lost, clueless puppy with the question: ‘what on Earth just happened???’ replaying in his head and it’s so freaking cute!

Wait....what was that? Since when do I use the adjective cute to describe Ranboo? Didn’t I think he looks handsome in a suit earlier too? The hell is with me today?

Then it hits me - the feeling isn’t foreign. Like, I know I’ve felt it before but I never analyzed it or even bothered to acknowledge it. But now that I do, I’m afraid of what it might be.

“There!“ I say, desperately trying to push the thoughts away along with this little firework show in my stomach, “Now you have pinker cheeks. Well, cheek, singular.“

As if snapping out of his state of confusion, he returns to Earth with a smirk, “Kiss the other to even it?”

Alright, his blush might not be even but mine now is and it’s ten times as intense and very much apparent but I don’t let the feeling shine through anything else as I proceed to actually kiss his other cheek too, wiping the lipstick stain.

“Thanks. You’re the best.” And just like that, as though it’s no big deal, he kisses my forehead.

See, that’s the thing, it shouldn’t be a big deal! It’s never been! This is far from the first time I’ve kissed him on the cheek or the first time he’s given me a forehead kiss. These are regular occurrences after years of this lovely friendship we have. Why do they feel so different now?

Then, much to my relief, the music starts and the lights turn off leaving only one spotlight for the groom and bride to have their first dance. They look absolutely astonishing and I can certainly say I’ve never before stopped to think that about any newly weds of the weddings I’ve preciously been to. I don’t know if it has something to do with the company I have for this particular wedding or it’s maybe the fact that my mindset’s changed over the years without me realizing.

Then I automatically look at Ranboo who just so happens to be looking at me too and all I can say is: my mindset hasn’t changed.

A loud applause takes over when the couple finish their dance, officially opening the dancefloor for any other pairs who’d like to occupy it and I’m happy to see how many people are eager to rush up with their partner.

 Ranboo gets up, putting the glass down and offers me his hand, “So, wanna dance? Don’t take this as a sign to leave though, we said one dance and you CAN leave, not SHOULD.” He says, giving me a warning look.

I roll my eyes and am about to give him some sass right back but he takes my hand and picks me up from my seat, leading me to the dancefloor.  And I gotta admit maybe it’s a good thing he did. If he left it to me I would’ve probably said no to the dance and ran the hell away. Why? - Cause I’m freaking terrified of this new mindset and point of view and these intense emotions I never used to pay any mind to before in regards to my best friend.

Friends don’t feel that way about friends. Friends don’t look at friends that way. What’s happening to me?

When I gotta look him in the eyes like this, not for the first time might I add, I can finally understand how the friends-to-lovers trope works: it’s all meaningless until it starts to mean so much to you. It’s all platonic until it reminds you of a romantic movie moment. It ‘best friends’ until it’s ‘I wish we were more than that’. It’s all casual, until it’s not.

And, unfortunately, it’s irreversible.

Damn do I wish I ran away now...

[merakiui]

I was reading through your tags and you mentioned at some point the kazuscara roommates finding your onlyfans and I think I completely combusted—thus i present to you my brain rot of late: you attend the same school as them but you’re not actually friends, all you know about kazuha is that he’s the friendly regular at the cafe you work at, who makes polite conversation every now and then but otherwise is nothing of note. In reality he’s been stalking you for weeks ever since your first encounter, and is dead set on the idea that you’re this innocent, weak thing that needs to be protected (maybe he stepped in when you had a bad customer and your meek reply helped fester his delusions?). Scara, on the other hand, is only aware of your presence since you’re his favourite cam model that he recently found. (Since he’s a harbinger he’s probs loaded) Weeks of funnelling money towards you cause him to feel this unwarranted possessiveness, believing that since he’s been providing so much in your “relationship” that it’s time you reward him in turn. However, despite the unbridled interest they have toward you neither are aware of each other’s feelings for you— that is, until you happen to run into the both of them heading to your class. While both are known for maintaining their stoic masks, they’re friends for a reason— and instantly can tell the attraction their roommates have towards their own “lover”. After kazuha finds your onlyfans he’s certain that you’ve been coerced and wants to save you, while scara thinks it’s time that he’s stopped letting other plebeians look at his possession—so, despite their initial reservations, come together to form the ideal plan. When you find yourself waking up groggy in a room you don’t recognize, all they can do is look on with glee whilst planning their next course of action with their new belonging. They’re friends after all, and good friends share though, don’t they?

This is v long srry lol you can ignore this ofc!!

AAAH, ANON!! YES!!! <3 I couldn’t resist writing more on this concept. orz They make for such a terrifying pair when they work together!

(cw: yandere, stalking, nsfw, implied kidnapping/drugging, unhealthy behaviors/relationship, delusional thoughts, savior complex, implied violence)

What if Kazuha and Scara were just acquainted with one another and actually became closer through their mutual obsession with you? Yes, they’re roommates and ought to get along because they’re living together but they haven’t exactly clicked yet. They talk every now and then and know little things about each other. Nothing too special. They don’t really hang out outside of their dorm either, what with their class schedules being vastly different. And Kazuha’s always out of the dorm doing who-knows-what. Most of his time is spent at a café, where he’ll write and read and stare at you while you work. On the other hand, Scara prefers to stay inside if he doesn’t have a good reason to go out. He likes his alone time. Although he has enjoyed going to the library every now and then to study.

So maybe they need to find some common ground. Maybe they need a push in the right direction before they get closer.

Kazuha likes to stare. Talking to you is great, but he worries he’ll say too much and then he’ll be a nuisance, or you might not want to talk to him at all since you’re working. But you always regard him with a warm smile, happy to scribble his name on the plastic cup because you remember him. Because you recognize his familiar face and soft, gentle eyes. He’s the one who saved you from that rude customer, after all, and he’s a polite regular. Why wouldn’t you know him? You might look like you can handle those types of situations, but what Kazuha saw that day was something entirely different. You were nervous—so soft-spoken and scared. He absolutely has to protect you from those kinds of people now, doesn’t he?

And he does exactly that. He’s your second pair of eyes—your valiant knight in shining armor—who sees and hears all. Sometimes he goes to the café with the intention to simply watch over you and make sure no one’s bothering you. He can recall one time when a customer was speaking rudely about you because her drink hadn’t been prepared in a ‘timely manner.’ In reality it’s impossible to make a drink within a few seconds, especially when you’re already preoccupied with making another customer’s drink. She must’ve woken up on the wrong side of the bed, or maybe she’s just a hateful person in general. You didn’t deserve to be on the receiving end of such fiery insults, though.

Her eyes just can’t see your perfection and therefore she does not deserve to see out of them.

Kazuha’s willing to wrestle with all of this darkness if it means you’ll stay safe, oblivious, and pure. You’re like a defenseless kitten, unable to protect yourself from the scary world. He writes about you a lot in his journal; you’re his muse—someone who constantly shows up in poems and short paragraphs where he tries to describe what your dream date might be or what type of wedding you’d prefer. Things get darker the deeper you delve into his writings, where you’ll find entries in great detail. Kazuha writes a lot and he doesn’t even mean to. He just has to get all of his thoughts on paper before they abandon him and he’s left with emptiness.

Everything you do is pure; you’re almost an equivalent to a holy being. Your smell is pure. Your body is pure. Your actions are pure. Your smile is pure. Even when you’re on the verge of crying from harsh customers or when you’re turning down a confession, you’re still pure. And Kazuha likes that about you because it’s special. There aren’t many people in his life who are completely pure. He’s been through a lot of rough things and has seen firsthand how impure people can be. It’s only fair that he gets a chance to protect purity itself.

He might have some impurities, but that doesn’t deter him from watching over you. As gentle and unassuming as he is, there are times when even he loses his composure. Not many are privy to these dark emotions of his. His smiles are sharp and venomous and his eyes fill with a gloom so dark it can swallow you whole. You’ll never see this side of him; he won’t allow it. Instead you’re treated to his sweet, calm side, where he feigns perfection in hopes of catching your interest.

As for Scara… He doesn’t really care about Kazuha in the beginning. He’s just someone he has to live with. It’s not a big deal and as long as he doesn’t try to make lots of pointless conversation everything will be okay. He prefers the peace and quiet, considering he’s acquainted with people who are far from peaceful and quiet. Scara’s relieved that Kazuha leaves the dorm so often because it gives him an opportunity to watch his favorite cam star’s most recent video. He’s your most loyal follower—someone who’s paid lots of money just to have access to the highest tier of rewards and such. He even got a private video where you addressed him and moaned out his name with lustful thoughts of him. Having lots of money comes in handy.

When he finds out that you go to the same school as him, he’s a little shocked. He didn’t expect you to be so close. You’re practically within touching distance. If only he knew your schedule. If only you were in one of his classes. It’s really annoying that he only knows your online presence and not who you might be in your personal life. The last thing he’s going to do is consult Childe, that popular athlete who knows literally everyone in the school for whatever reason. Surely he knows you. But he’ll die before he ever asks Childe for a favor.

Scara loves you out of every other cam model because you’re different. You’re not just trying to get fast cash. You’re genuine. You listen to your subscribers and their feedback. You do your best to improve and do even better streams than the previous ones. All of your hard work is overlooked by the other fools who watch your streams, but it isn’t overlooked by him. Scara appreciates your attention to detail and the way you’re able to hook him with your breathless voice alone. You’re very skilled at what you do, so it’s only fair you get paid for it.

But buying your services isn’t enough. It’s not a real relationship, but it certainly feels like it when he buys preferential treatment. Private shows, special requests, odd favors—you do it all because he pays for it. But this relationship isn’t going to be one-sided forever. You’ll have to pay him back in full eventually. Scara likes to think he has patience and that waiting is fine. It gives him more time to plan his next move—to figure out what he should do to finally have you all to himself. So that those private shows he watches through a screen can finally be real.

Scara finds the journal sitting innocently on Kazuha’s bed, its maroon cover and maple leaves pulling at his curiosity. He might not know everything about Kazuha, but he’d recognize this journal anywhere. His roommate almost always has it on his person. Scara wouldn’t be surprised if he slept with it. To say he’s curious would be absolutely correct. He can only wonder what Kazuha writes in that thing. Perhaps it’s just notes for a class. That’s what anyone would think, right?

Scara opens it and flips through the first few pages. They’re normal for the most part. Just a bunch of haikus and other useless scribbles. When he skips over some pages, he starts to find things that are far more interesting than poetry and doodles of cats. He finds the majority of the journal is comprised of information. More specifically, there are facts and other knowledge about you—the cam model he’s been obsessed with ever since he stumbled upon your onlyfans. He reads through as much of the journal as he can and instantly learns so much: your address, your roommate, your workplace, your friends’ names, names of any potential exes. The list goes on and on.

Scara doesn’t have anything against Kazuha. His first impression of him wasn’t anything groundbreaking. He thought he was a pushover at first. But now that he knows what this journal holds… Well, it sheds an entirely new light on his roommate.

Just days before Scara took a peek inside his journal, Kazuha discovers your secret online life. He snoops through Scara’s laptop when he steps out, having left it open and unlocked. He’s just trying to find what could have caught Scara’s interest, as he’s almost always glued to his laptop on specific days at specific times, with his headphones on and his gaze unyielding. He doesn’t intend to find the file of one of your private videos—something that was meant only for Scara’s eyes.

He clicks on the video out of interest. He’s not sure what he was expecting to see, but it definitely wasn’t this. Kazuha sits there and stares at the sight before him. You’re dressed in skimpy lingerie and you’re muttering the dirtiest things while coating your fingers in lube. And your hands are stroking a thick toy and you’re addressing Scara and you’re lining it up to your hole and— He shuts the laptop before it can get even more explicit than it already is. He’s so conflicted, fraught with a betrayal so strong it weighs his heart down.

Why would he have this sort of video on his laptop? Did you give it to him? Did he make you do this? Are you in danger? Are you still pure?

Kazuha can’t kill on campus. It’s way too risky and he’d be one of the first suspects if Scara’s body is found. Besides, it’s not like he has the full story. He doesn’t know whether or not Scara’s done something that’s worthy of death. You could just be in a tight spot. He knows how easily you give in when you’re under pressure. Maybe you’re just doing this because you feel like it’s the only thing you can do. Not to worry; Kazuha will save you before Scara can ruin your purity with his twisted fantasies.

They confront each other when the time feels right. Kazuha struggles to keep a smile plastered to his face for the sake of politeness, while Scara holds in his raging temper so that he can bear some semblance of cooperation. Neither of them is happy to hear that the other went through their stuff, but they force themselves to make up because a more pressing issue is at hand: their connection to you.

Kazuha says he’s your secret admirer. Scara says he’s in a relationship with you. There’s no way you’d ever date someone like Scara—Kazuha knows this for a fact. Yet he falters at the confidence in Scara’s tone. That can’t be the truth, right? Despite this, Kazuha still strikes up an offer: If they work together to get what they both want, they’ll be unstoppable. With Scara’s riches and his influence and Kazuha’s charisma and clever thinking, they can easily get their hands on you. Of course this means they’ll have to share, but it’s not a big deal when they’re already in so deep. They both know the other’s secret; now they’re swearing to keep it in the pursuit of having you all to themselves. And luckily Scara agrees to the deal, but that doesn’t give Kazuha a reason to lower his guard.

However despite how well they work together when it comes to planning the kidnapping and actually executing it, they both have their own reasons for wanting you. Scara wishes to make his relationship with you a reality—to toss aside the screen that once held him back and finally do all of the things he could only do in his dreams. Kazuha seeks to protect your fragile heart, lest you crumble under Scara’s intense way of doing things and cling to him for salvation. You can’t do those sorts of things with Scara; he won’t allow it. Your purity is meant for him and no one else.

But sharing is caring and some have to learn that the hard way. It definitely brings Kazuha and Scara closer together, even if neither of them will admit it. If they look past their desires, they can be friends. And soon enough they’ll have to accept this new friendship if they want to avoid any unnecessary complications.

However there are times when they’ll cooperate in order to do things with you. They’re a packaged deal you can’t get rid of.

[writingintheshadowsforever]

Avengers x reader Cold-Hearted part 1

You never thought you would see the day where you entered this building again. It was only a couple of years ago you were trying to get as faraway as possible from this building. But it wasn't always like that there was a time this place was like a second home to you. Your first home being the city the building was located in. One miscalculation that led to a bad experiment sent you running to keep your freedom. Now ironically here you were turning to the same people that you use to fear for help in order to keep the same freedom. That they threatened to take away from you back then, but then you disappeared.

They looked for you at first you remember all the close calls, but you got better at hiding your tracks. Eventually you were too good and they just gave up. You figured they came to the conclusion you weren't a real danger to anyone. Too bad it didn't age well after what you did in San Francisco, it was impossible for you to hide anymore. Not with your face plaster on TV, and every single news reporter in the country covering your story. You were wanted and if you didn't seek out refuge then this time your freedom really would be taken away.

A couple walked by watching a video on on the guy's phone, and your ears picked on a few phrases.

San Francisco, ice storm, enhanced female, authorities.

You didn't need to hear the whole story to know that they were watching a news report about you. It made you self-conscious like someone would recognize you even with the hoodie covering your face, and the sunglasses hiding your eyes. Any minute now the cops would pull up and surround you. They would be ready with a collar to put around your neck to dampen your powers. Then you would tossed in the back of a black SVU to never be seen again. As much as you would like to believe that this was all your imagination. You knew it could be reality if you didn't suck it up, and go inside to seek out the only person that could actually keep you out of prison.

Part of you was afraid that he would say no. After all your running got him into big trouble with the government as well. The leader couldn't have been too happy with him losing you. Especially considering how big of a part he played in the incident that gave you powers. He promised you that he could be trusted and everything would be okay. All you had to do was believe in him, and you looked him in the eyes promising him to give his plan a chance. Even though you knew that you had no intention of staying and seeing what his plan was. In a way you betrayed him, so there was a slight chance that he would return the favor now.

But the time to dwell on what could happen was over because it was now or never. This was the best chance you were ever going to get. You let out a deep breath that you didn't even know you were holding in. As you watched the elevator doors in the building open and Tony Stark walk out. It must have been time for a lunch break or something. You knew the best time to catch him would be in the lobby because getting past security would be impossible. Not to mention if they recognized your face the cops would be called.

You made your way inside of Stark Industries and waited by the doors. Not wanting to have to walk past security at all Tony was lingering by the desk talking to the secretary. You leaned up against the wall with your hands stuffed in your pockets. Praying for him to hurry up before someone found you to be too suspicious. A few minutes later your prayers were answered. Tony left the front desk and headed towards the exit.

It was when he walking right past you not even stopping to spare you a glance that you chose to speak up.

"Does Pepper know you and the secretary are so friendly with each other?"

Tony paused turning his head finally acknowledging your presence. "Excuse what did you say?" He sounded more annoyed than surprised which meant he didn't recognize your voice yet.

You figured that you would keep the mystery going deciding not to give away your true identity yet. You wanted him to remember you by himself.

"I'm just saying she use to be mighty paranoid about you talking to other women. When you and her got together in what would be your first real relationship."

You pushed yourself off the wall and started to walk around him making sure your back was to the lobby, and all the security cameras. His eyes followed your every move with his eyebrows furrowing.

You continued on "I remember the first time you had me stay over in the tower. The project we were working on had us both stressing but neither of us wanted to take a step back. It was the first time I realized just how close we really were. All the other employees complained that you never let any of them step foot inside your home. Maybe that's why Pepper assumed you were cheating."

"That's enough just exactly who are you" Tony demanded his voice quiet but serious. You could see it in his eyes that he was growing frustrated, but seeing him reminded you how the past five years had been filled with nothing but frustration for you. And he was the reason for it so he could suffer a little longer.

"Wow you really don't remember my voice I mean it has been a long time. But still you would think that you remember the little genius that was like the daughter you never had. At least that's what you called me back then. When Pepper came in fuming at a young woman being in your home. But I guess things have changed haven't they Tony?"

You pulled off the sunglasses and letting Tony see your entire face for the first time.

He let out an audible gasp staggering as he tried to take a couple of steps towards you. He was so shocked that he lost his speech and balance. Still he managed to utter a single word your name.

"Y/N"

"Wow never thought I see the day you were so caught off guard considering everything you've been through. I mean aliens coming out the sky' gods from another planet, a robot of your own creation turning evil and trying to wipeout humanity. Oh wait that last one seems pretty accurate shouldn't surprise you to much at all. I mean that is how I was created, and even though I didn't go all evil. I have done some pretty terrible things."

Tony finally regained control over his legs and in a blink of eye. He was right in front of you wrapping his arms around in a tight embrace. But you didn't return it instead you struggled trying to push him away to his hold relented.

He looked you in the eyes keeping a firm hand on your shoulder. You knew right then that one thing was true. He wasn't going to let you escape this time.

"The cold storm in San Francisco was that you?" was his only question

The cold storm that had covered the entire city in snow and ice. And not just the streets but the entire city looked like a kingdom made of ice. Like the one Elsa created in Frozen someone else made that lame joke trying to lighten up the natural disaster that was anything but natural. The one that caused so many people to die of either frostbite or hypothermia. Because the military was doing its best at rescuing everyone. But the ice was so sleek and hard and it wasn't melted easily.

Which made it hard to get to the people that were trapped inside of houses, cars, and buildings. But those were the lucky ones some had been caught outside and vulnerable when it happened. Bodies were frozen all over the streets and in the water. As much as they wanted to hit multiple locations they were forced to pick on one area to focus on. The Avengers were sent there just a day before you arrived in New York City to help.

You didn't say anything instead you answered with a tiny nod.

Tony's head dropped onto your shoulder but you didn't the miss the look of utter guilt in his eyes.

While you wanted to feel sorry for him you couldn't. You found joy that you wouldn't be burdening this guilt alone anymore.

He deserved to feel it too after all he played his part in your story as well.

Taglist: @wandanatvoid @yelenabelovasgf @ironscarletwidowsoilder

[darwin-xf]

Love is a Verb

His dick knew things.

In general, thinking with your little head not your big one got a bad rap.

But for him? The opposite seemed to apply.

Of course he’d been mortified when he sprung to life in her hand the night before, with Scully in full on doctor mode, acting so clinical and detached. While he was so very very exposed.

A wave of anger arose in the wake of his humiliation. At her. Which wasn’t fair. She was doing him a favor, after all. Examining him, because they were stuck in a crap motel in the middle of nowhere Florida, the day after a hurricane, flights snafued, roads clogged with debris. And him with a sea monster bite on his neck and an angry itchy red rash on his dick to match. She was caring for him, just like she always did. Even though neither one of them was exactly comfortable about the prospect.

But now, considering what that moment of vulnerability had led to, he was glad it happened. And hardly surprised.

And when his big head has been muddled and confused on a night a few weeks before? His dick had shown the way forward. When a different woman had laid her hands on him, slipped her tongue into his mouth.

He didn’t want her. He felt like a block of wood as she kissed him and touched him. And yet he let it happen. His mind filled with a fuzzy gray static as she whispered to him how she needed him, how she’d never stopped loving him, until she was kneeling on the floor in front of him. She opened his pants and he let her, hungry for something she was offering. He would think a lot about that later.

But then his dick was in her mouth. And she worked it, employed all her little tricks. And still it stayed soft.

Until, giving up, she stood. She crossed the room and poured herself a scotch. He tucked his junk in his pants and zipped up. Not even embarrassed.

“You love her,” Diana said, her back to him.

He nodded. “I do.”

“But Fox,” she said, closing the distance between them, sitting down next to him, “She doesn’t know you like I do. There’s so much I want to give you...”

She launched into the pitch he’d heard from her before. Since she returned, she’d been whispering to him whenever she could get him alone, offering him access. “There are so many things we can accomplish together, Fox. Why would you want to keep toiling in the dark when you can shape the future of the human race? You’ve more than earned your seat at the table. And your voice is needed there...”

Though he never really felt engaged in these conversations, his big head listened to what Diana had to say.

But the little one was more persuasive. Not to mention more persistent. The truth was, Scully had been the only one able to get him off for months. Though of course she hadn’t touched him.

His extensive collection of salacious videotapes these days stayed tucked in their hiding places, moldering in their cases. The magazines delivered to his door each month, Penthouse and Hustler and Escort and Razzle and Club, remained stacked on his entryway table, their spines uncracked, their pages unperused. Most with the black no-see-um wrapper still intact.

A fact Scully discovered while visiting his apartment a few weeks before. She turned up on the late side one evening, work on her mind, files in her hand, her body tucked dutifully away in some dark suit.

“Oh that,” he said when she placed her palm on the towering cache of smut, popped an eyebrow in his direction. She had spent enough time in his space to understand that this was a departure from his usual behavior, where his porn was concerned. Whereby he’d rip the covers off the mags as soon as they arrived and leaf through them, looking for anything particularly good. He’d turn down the corners of memorable pages then leave them piled haphazardly around his place: on end tables, under the fishtank, next to his bed.

The explanation was not something he was prepared to share. So he thought fast, and invented something on the fly that seemed remotely plausible. “Yeah, the boys tell me that those are going to be collector's items soon. Print is dead, Scully. Everyone making the switch from atoms to bits and bytes. Paper’s so pulpy and inefficient. I have a book on it somewhere...” He riffled through his bookshelf, glad to escape her excruciating gaze. He plucked out a book and handed her a copy of Being Digital by Nicholas Negroponte. “He’s a smart guy. You should check it out.”

His effort to distract her was in vain. She put the book aside without glancing at the cover and continued to silently cross-examine him. He pretended to be interested in another book he’d pulled at random, but the moment stretched on uncomfortably. "I thought I could get more for them if they remained in pristine condition,” he said as he paged through the book he wasn’t reading. For all he knew he was holding it upside down. “You know how people keep their Star Wars toys in the boxes with the cellophane on?”

She shrugged, unconvinced. But she moved on, willing to let it go. Her stacked heels clacked obnoxiously against his hardwood floors as she slowly made her way into his living room.

He doubted she wanted to know the real reason. Though he was pretty sure he could turn the tables on her if he blurted it out. It would serve her right for the way she roamed around his apartment and let her eyes light on his stuff, storing her little data points in that mind, trying to figure him out. But maybe one day the tea leaves of his pitiable life she seemed so eager to read would finally speak to her. Maybe it would occur to her what was actually going on.

Which was that every time he touched himself, he imagined it was her hand. And he would try to switch things over, open one of his skin mags— his trusty strategy for years when it came to getting his thoughts off his partner and back where they belonged —but it wasn’t working anymore.

He’d listlessly page through the glossies, looking for a promising spread, land on some blowjob scene and eyeball it for a while. But when he got down to business it, was her mouth on him, warm and receptive, her eyes on his face, his hands in her coppery hair. He’d smolder for a while, thinking of her lips, her strong small hands, and always her eyes, then feverishly work himself up. And the magazine, forgotten, would slip away onto the floor.

On the bright side, his inappropriate intrusive fixation on his FBI partner was saving him two hundred bucks a month he used to spend on phone sex. The last time he dialed in he couldn’t even get it up. So he spilled his guts to one of his regular providers, droning on for forty-five minutes about how he had it bad for his partner, all the things she did that made him crazy, the reasons he couldn’t tell her. Realizing even therapy would be cheaper, and feeling like a terrible cliché, he’d quit calling those numbers.

His videos were his last line of defense. Their absorbing input had always been able to capture his attention, so he’d try one of those. It might work for a few minutes, but the real action was behind his eyes. In his mind it was her heels digging in to the small of his back as he plunged into her tight little cunt. She’d be beneath him hot and panting, open her mouth to moan and he’d stuff his fingers in, slide them wetly against her tongue. Soon he’d be picking up the pace... The television would blare fruitlessly in the background, rife with bad dialogue and silicone silo tits and oh babys. The money shot would come and go, unseen by him, and the screen would fade to black.

The reason porn had quit working was simple: in his fantasies, she always comes too. Usually more than once. He’d start slow, imagine he was taking his time kissing his way down her body. That could take a while. Then he’d tease her, rubbing the fat head of his cock up and down her slit. When she begged him to, he’d slip inside her and slam his hips forward. He’d hold there, bottomed out, and kiss her sweet mouth. Then he’d slide it in and out, looking into her eyes, feeling every inch of her.

Soon he’d need to fuck her harder, faster. He’d reach down to tease her clit until she was thrashing and pleading. Then she’d say his name, and her face would change, and she’d come on his dick. He’d watch her ride it out, humming with pleasure as her warm wet circles broke against him and travelled up his body in waves. Till his nuts and his gut and his heart and his throat and his brain were replete with her. Finally he’d come, imagining he was cradled by her hips and rocking, buried deep inside her, spilling his secrets into her ear.

In his dirty busy mind he’d already had her so many places and ways: in showers and motel beds, in cars and elevators, bent over his desk at work, the door unlocked, her skirt bunched around her waist, her drugstore pantyhose dangling from her ankle. Quick or slow or sweet or mean, acrobatic or missionary, rough or tender. Or both. God. Even boring. Just the two of them in his bed, nose to nose under the covers, whispering and giggling and whiling away a Sunday morning.

And the most pathetic and woebegone detail? Sometimes his fantasies contained no sex at all. He wanted to watch a movie with her feet parked in his lap. He wanted to shop for groceries with her and hold her hand on the walk home. To spend a weekend with her on the Vinyard and show her his old high school. He wanted to rub her back when she was sad and play footsie with her under the table during boring budget meetings. He wanted to gather her close and kiss her eyelids and hold her in his arms as she fell asleep. To watch her to rise naked from his bed and pull on his clothes she’d just stripped from his body. On red eye flights he wanted to leave the arm rest up and snuggle with her under those dingy felt blankets. To read to her while she soaked in the tub and find the nooks and hollows of her body where she was ticklish. He wanted to make her giggle, make her laugh, make her cry happy tears. He wanted to make her wet just with his voice. To lay in bed and watch while she got dressed for church. He wanted to kiss her in front of her idiot brother, maybe even slip her a tasteful amount of tongue. To shower with her before work, to soap her up and shampoo her hair. He wanted to stock his fridge with an assortment of her gross non-dairy yogurts.

Scully. Before she’d even descended into his office and introduced herself, he assumed she was a plant. Or a dupe, a patsy. Why else would a promising and talented young agent be conscripted to his lonely, disrespected division? Most likely she’d already agreed to keep tabs on him, to cast his work in a negative light. And even if she hadn’t, he was certain she’d be manipulated, using the lever of her obvious ambition, into doing so. He also suspected, since she’d spent most of her time thus far in the FBI in the lab or the classroom, that she was a house cat. The kind of agent who might hold romantic notions about working in the field, but who would soon balk at the grueling, unpredictable hours, the endless travel, the physical grind. And blanch at the dangers. It’s no kind of life for anybody who wants a life.

By the time their flight touched down in Oregon on that first case, he knew for sure that she was fun to spar with. And all kinds of smart. And even sort of cute. And while it can obviously be helpful to have a partner if things go sideways, he remembers hoping that didn’t happen to them before she washed out and retreated back to the lab. Because he suspected this itty bitty pathologist with zero field experience and impractical footwear? Would be more likely to become a liability than properly cover his flank.

After they’d worked a half dozen cases together, it was fair to say he’d reconsidered the hasty assumptions he’d made about Scully. Which is to say she surprised him at every turn. Except on the couple of occasions when she’d astonished him, leaving him flat-footed and slack-jawed in her wake. Against all odds, he had himself a partner. Which is not to say he fully trusted her. Not yet. And he doubted she’d hang around much longer.

But still. He’d learned that she was game. Skeptical and rational, but up for anything. She never complained about bad food or lumpy beds. And courageous, staring down firearms pushed in her face without blinking. She was fearless and cagy, and could take a punch or dish one out. And in the next moment she could soften, to connect with a suspect or a victim, to care for a child, or for him. She believed deeply in what she was doing. When he bumbled into trouble, which he seemed to have a knack for, she more than had his back. Yet when she’d sided with him and blew off her buddies from the Academy? It wasn’t loyalty to him she was demonstrating, but to the victims. To the truth. Above all, Scully was honest.

In some ways, he knew her so well. Yet all these years later there was there were aspects to her he could only guess at. Scully, he’d come to understand, was a deeply private person. Didn’t give pieces of herself away in idle conversation, like most people do. The fact that he was a trained and skilled profiler didn’t seem to help. In his fevered mind he’d become preoccupied with the things he didn’t know about her. Like how, exactly, does she like to be touched? He thought about that a lot. Is she a morning sex person? (God he hoped so.) Is she loud in bed? Or more quiet and intense? A little repressed, or wild and uninhibited? He could imagine it either way. Is she bossy? Submissive? A little of both? What does she taste like? Does she talk dirty? Will she like it when he does? (Because he definitely does.) How would he tease her? What are her kinks? Does she like it rough? And if he wanted to go down on her for hours, would she be okay with that?

So, yeah. He loved her.

That switch had been flicked for him on a steamy summer evening, a moment when he’d been staring down the real possibility of losing her. She walked away. He followed her, flew out his door like he’d been shot out of a cannon. Stormed up to her where she’d turned to face him in his hallway. Fists clenched, voice raised, he was in full on fighting mode. But he wasn’t fighting her. He was fighting to keep her. So instead of telling her off, as his body language suggested he might, he told her what she meant to him. How he needed her. Things he hadn’t even realized before they came out of his mouth. But all of it the truth.

She’d been girded and resolute, her body rigid and self-contained. But then she broke, like a marionette whose strings had been cut, she softened and stepped into his embrace. He looked in her impossibly blue eyes glinting with tears and realized with dreadful certainty that, Christ, he was going to kiss his partner. More than that, if she let him, he was going to pick her up and carry her back through the door of his apartment and lay her down and fuck her.

That plan had been derailed, but the urge for him remained. And not long after, he gathered his courage and, with all the earnestness he could muster, he’d looked her in the eyes and confessed.

So he’d told her that he loved her. But had he shown her?

That was a thorny question, and it made him uncomfortable to consider it. Because he had to admit that for the most part, he hadn’t.

It was strange, but once his feelings for Scully had shifted, his behavior toward her had become less loving. For one thing, he didn’t let her in on that fact that she’d become the only featured player in his secret late-nite fantasy theatre. But more than that, he found himself especially irritable with her. Dismissive. Self-centered. Sometimes even cold.

When he was looking for an excuse to be angry with her, he told himself a story that she’d rejected him. Because, oh brother. But he’d seen her eyes go wide for an instant, felt her animal panic. She’d pored over his hospital chart and had to know he wasn’t high. So he’d concluded that she didn’t want him. Didn’t love him.

And Fowley’d chosen that inopportune moment to skip back over the pond and make a play for his ass. And though he had no interest in rekindling that relationship, just having her around reminded him of all the reasons it just might be a bad idea to get tangled up sexually with your partner.

More than that, even though he knew that Scully felt insecure because of Diana for several legitimate reasons, he hadn’t bothered to reassure her that she had nothing to worry about. When Diana called him and invited him downstairs for lunch, he’d go. Mostly to be near his files, and to mine the trashcans for cases when her back was turned. But he’d steal away from the bullpen, not tell Scully where he was off to, or why. He let her twist in the wind, wondering who Diana was to him and what her reappearance meant for their partnership.

It would make sense that once you’ve discovered the person you love, the person with whom you want to spend the rest of your days (not even to mention nights), the person who is, quite possibly, it for you? That you would try to make that happen. To lock that down. And yet he seemed to be doing everything but.

Even after she’d been shot by Ritter, and he’d almost lost her again.

And why was that? How to explain this puzzling behavior.

Maybe she didn’t want him, and he was just protecting himself.

The thing was, when he was being honest, he knew that wasn’t true. When he’d been about to kiss her in his hallway, she’d looked confused at first. And then concerned, with real fear flashing in her eyes. But by the time his lips were hovering over hers? They were on the same page. She’d gone molten in his arms, and her mouth awaited his, wet and ready. His body remembered how she’d opened to him, with her sweet breath and her fingers on his neck. He knew in his bones how that encounter would have ended, if not for that stupid fucking bee. Recalled it every chance he got.

As a psychologist, looking at the situation objectively? He’d have to conclude that he was engaging in some epic self-sabotage. Yup.

That night in her apartment when Diana had made her intentions clear, he’d agreed like some kind of docile sheep to join her. To scrum up with the other chosen few at El Rico Air Force Base as Armageddon loomed and save himself at the expense of the rest of humanity. And Scully, even though he wasn’t by her side where he belonged, was still fighting. For him, For them. For the truth. For the future.

And to repay her for her steadfast faith in him and devotion to their work? He was flirting with the one thing that could tear them apart. With inflicting a betrayal that could send her packing for good.

They’d dodged a bullet that night. More than that, they’d gotten their files back, and were free to resume their work. And by any measure he should have felt relieved. But he woke the next morning with a hangover worse than any he’d ever gotten from liquor. He looked in the mirror to shave and realized he couldn’t even meet his own gaze. He was ashamed. And he had to admit that he’d been seduced by Diana after all. Not into bed, but into complacency.

Needing some time and space to think things through, he called Skinner and redeemed a few vacation days. He threw some clothes in a bag and set out driving, not sure of his destination.

On the road, heading north, armed with this new clarity, he mulled things over. How was he going to feel, he wondered, when he succeeded and chased her away? That seemed to be his end game, after all. He knew what he’d do. He’d track her down to wherever she’d absconded to and interrupt her as she attempted to reboot her life. Then, looking desperate and half mad, he’d profess his love.

But it would be too late. She would conclude, quite logically, that he only wanted her when she was leaving. And even if she loved him like he hoped she might, she would not settle for that. Not Scully. And it would be selfish of him to ask her to.

It hit him then, with complete and utter clarity, that he had no idea how to love someone. He’d had bad models and a dearth of life experience in that arena. He knew how he felt. But love is a verb. It’s about what you do. She had taught him that.

He was good with the grand gestures, sure. Tracking her down at the bottom of the world and fishing her out of an enormous alien vessel, for example. Then breathing life back into her and hauling her to the surface while sidestepping rabid lizard monsters who swiped at them with razor-edged claws? Check.

But she needed more. For him to find mundane ways to express his care and concern, perhaps. To show her how much she mattered to him. How much he valued her and all the ways she contributed to their work. To his life. She needed to see that he put her first. She deserved these things. She had earned them. And he knew wouldn’t let him glimpse her secret self, let him know her like he desperately wanted to, until he gave them to her.

He wasn’t sure he could do it. But he knew he had to try.

He decided to start right away. He’d been thinking of her all morning, of course. About celebrating their return by pressing her her against a wall in their office and pushing into her, fucking her breathless and senseless before lunch, to be exact. But he hadn’t thought of her at all, he realized. Not really.

Scully. She’d be there right now, in the basement waiting for him, their first day back where they belonged. Wondering where he could be with half the morning gone. Bewildered as to what might be keeping him from reclaiming his precious turf. Maybe she already talked to Skinner and knew he was taking a few days off. Maybe she’d be worried. Or pissed. Or worse, wondering if he was enjoying a morning lounging in bed with a treacherous leggy brunette.

At the next rest stop, he pulled off and powered up his cell phone. He was relieved to see that he'd missed a call from her. She hadn’t given up on him yet.

Rather than listen to her message, he dialed her back. She answered on the third ring.

“Hey Mulder,” she said.

“Hey Scully,” he said. “Are you in the office?”

“I am,” she said. “Where I thought for sure you would be. Skinner told me you were on vacation. What’s going on?” Her voice was brittle. Defensive.

“I will be, Scully. I’ll meet you there. And soon. But I need to take care of a few things first.”

“Okay,” she said thoughtfully. “What kinds of things?”

“I, ah, I need to get my head straight before coming back. I’ve been mixed up. About some stuff.”

“I see,” she said.

They were both quiet for long seconds.

“How are you?” he asked.

“Me?” The question surprised her. “I’m good. Enjoying the quiet. Working on expense reports. Glad to be out of the bullpen.”

“You sure? You were popular, Scully. I think Agent Kargoll was working up the nerve to ask you out.” Mulder would glare at him as he brought her a donut on a little plate in the mornings. He’d leave it on the corner of the desk if she wasn’t in yet, like an offering to the high priestess.

“Yep,” she said. “I noticed that too. Reassigned in the nick of time...”

“I did my best to scare him off...”

“He was persistent, I’ll give him that.”

“He seemed like a nice enough guy. You could do worse than landing a boyfriend who arrives bearing gifts every morning...”

“I could do better, too.”

“No doubt,” he said. “What would be better than that?”

“Hmm. Why do you ask?”

“Research,” he said.

“Research,” she repeated. “Okay. Let’s see. The bearing gifts is ok. But maybe someone with some sense of what I actually like?”

“Let me jot that down,” he said. She snorted a little laugh. Which warmed him all the way through. “It’s true, Scully, you’re not a big fan of donuts. I benefitted from his crush on you more than you did.”

“I tried to wait until he had his back turned before handing those off to you...”

“You’re very kind,” he said.

Just then a truck blew by on the highway, laying on the booming brake, rocking his car.

“Where are you?” she asked.

“I, ah, hit the road this morning. Just to think. Just to drive. But I suppose I’m heading home. To see my mother for a few days.”

“Everything okay?” she asked. He heard the concern in her voice, the fear that she’d be needing to tend to him trepanned and shocky, bail him out of jail. The usual.

“Yeah,” he said. “Or it will be. I really think it will be.”

“Allright Mulder,” she said after a long beat. “I’ll be holding down the fort. Drive safe. And keep in touch.”

“I will. And save me some of that paperwork, Scully.”

She laughed and hung up.

He had, in fact, visited his mother. She was glad to see him, and he stayed a few days, helped her out with some chores around the house. Got on a ladder and plucked the muck and leaves from the gutters, shifted some dusty furniture from the basement to the curb.

And he absorbed the silences of that house, his mother’s sadness, the way every possession, every exchange seemed steeped in a deep, abiding misery.

He remembered his mother different. Laughing, for example. Playing bridge with her friends, toying with her strand of pearls as she leaned in to gossip. Teasing him with a glint of joy in her eyes. Before Samantha had been taken.

It had broken her. Broken all of them. Now she ghosted around her own home, tending to her roses, watching television. Always alone. He lived much the same way. This was all that was left.

All because his father had been unable to protect them from the men he worked with, no matter how noble his intentions. The same men he had been tempted by Fowley to join up with, if he was telling the truth. Now they were reduced to ash. He had no idea what remained, but he knew he and Scully would find out.

By the time he climbed in his car to come home, he was committed to not making his father’s mistake. And to living differently. Less stubbornly solitary. To inviting some goodness into his life, no matter how strange it felt.

And last night, when it was actually happening, when he was wrapped up in bed with Scully in real life, it had been so vivid, so peculiar. As he rolled his naked frame against hers, time slowed down. In his head he heard the seconds ticking away distorted by doppler effect, whomp whomp. Felt his stiff prick slide against her buttery thigh, painfully slow. Pressed his ear to her chest. Imagined the steady squeeze and release of her heart beneath her breastbone. Heard the whoosh of her blood through her veins.

Looked up at her flushed face, this beautiful untamable breakable beast.

And he loved her.

He’d told her so.

Now he needed to show her.

Thanks for reading. Check it out at Ao3 This fic stands alone, but is also chapter 10 of Bedside Manner

[haikyuuthots]

Hi I really enjoyed you tik tok prank head canon! Is there any way you can make a head canon where the reader calls them bro prank lol. Like how would they react. Can you do Atsumu, Suna, Bokuto and Ushijima please!!!! Thank you 😽

Calling him “bro” prank

Characters: Miya Atsumu, Suna Rintaro, Bokuto Koutarou and Ushijima Wakatoshi

Warnings: none I think

Scenario: how the boys would react if you tried the calling them bro prank on them haha

A/n; thanks for requesting!!! I had a lot of fun writing this one, I hope you enjoy it 😌💕

————————————————���—————

Miya Atsumu

You always referred to Atsumu as babe, baby or love

So when you saw this prank on Tik tok you wanted to see how he would react

You were both sitting in the living room of your shared apartment

He was watching a volleyball game on the tv while you were writing an essay on your laptop

He was going crazy talking about a serve one of his favorite teams just did

“Woooo babe did ya see that crazy serve?!??”

You thought this might be a good time to pull the prank off

“Mmm no i didn’t can you go back so I can see it?”

He rewinds the video and you watch intently as he shows excitement all over again

“Bro!! That was so cool” you say as casual as possible

Atsumu’s entire demeanor changes, and the look of excitement he had seconds ago completely fades

“What did ya just call me?” His face filled with confusion

“Huh when?” You try your best not to laugh out loud, he looks completely lost lmao

“Literally 3 seconds ago, you called me bro.”

“I did?” You’re doing your best to play it off

“Yes you did! I hate it I’m not your bro. ” He’s slightly pouting

You slightly chuckle “aw come on bro don’t be like that.”

He looks towards you with a disgusted face, he is evidently unsatisfied with your choice of words

“Y/n stop dont call me that I’m baby and nothing else I will actually ignore you if you call me that again.” He actually looks a bit upset

But you still wanna tease him a bit more

“Fine I’m sorry.,,” you briefly laugh and pause for a second “...bro”

“That’s it I’m ignoring ya til ya act right.”

He gets up and begins to walk away

You’re full blown laughing now “baby baby wait.” You say as you reach out to stop him

His ears slightly perk up at the mention of his regular nickname

Still laughing you talk “it’s a prank. I’m just messing with you. I saw it on Tik Tok

He looks down out you, in disbelief, his frown quickly changing into a smile

Soon after he starts laughing with you

“Chaotic duo*

“That was actually kinda mean babe, I was like wtf why is she calling me her brother”

You start laughing even more “ wtf did you actually think I would call you bro? Never. you’re baby.”

He leans in closer to you and gently grabs you by the waist kissing you softly on the lips “better be.”

You kiss him back and wrap your arms around his neck, he softly picks you up causing you to wrap your legs around his torso as he continues to kiss you

Pulling away briefly he speaks again “but seriously don’t ever call me bro again I hate it”

“I won’t” you answer smiling up at him.

Suna Rintaro

You usually don’t try to pull pranks on him because he normally never falls for them

But after watching so many of these on tik tok and watching the reactions you were curious to try it out yourself

You’re casually sitting on your boyfriends lap while you’re both on your phones watching short videos

A few time passes by when Suna breaks the silence between you two

“Hey babe you hungry?”

You thought this was the perfect time to call him bro

“Nah bro I’m good” you say sounding as normal as possible

Suna drops his phone and gently shifts you from his lap making you look towards him

You ignore him and continue to look down at your phone lol

He doesn’t say anything at first, leaving an awkward silence for a few seconds

Still staring in disbelief he breaks the silence again “pause that and look at me real quick.”

You do as he says and you look up at him innocently acting like nothing is wrong

“What’s up?” You innocently reply

His grip tightens around you waist a bit “did you.. really just call me that?”

“What are you talking about?” You’re trying your best to keep a straight face

“You just called me bro.” He’s pouting

You honestly can’t believe he fell for it hahahaha

“Oh. Yeah I did. Does that bother you?” You’re just trying to rile him up at this point lmao

He scowls at your reply, gently pushing you off of his lap so he can look at you better “yes that bothers me, I’m not out here calling you dude or anything because you’re my girlfriend.”

You can’t help but laugh at his expression. Completely satisfied at the fact he actually reacted to your little prank

Suna is beyond confused “why are you laughing? I’m serious please don’t call me bro.”

“Baby” you gently leans towards his chest as you continue to laugh “I’m totally joking, it’s a prank I saw on tik tok.”

He cracks a small smile before he speaks again “this is the dumbest prank ever.”

You’re still laughing “yeah? But you were hella pressed so it worked.”

He rolls his eyes at your teasing “yeah yeah you got me.”

Still smiling you sit on his lap again and hug him tightly placing small kisses on his face to lighten up his mood

“I promise I would never call you bro and mean it.”

He smiles into your kisses, tightening his grip around your body while he kisses you gently on the lips

“I’m glad you wouldn’t cause I’m your boyfriend.”

“I know baby.” You respond leaning in once again, to close the gap between your lips.

Bokuto Koutarou

You have not called bokuto by his name since you started dating

It’s always a baby, babe or bub

So when you were on tik tok and saw a girl prank her boyfriend by calling him bro you wanted to try it out yourself on your boyfriend.

You and bokuto were tangled in each other’s arms watching a movie together.

The movie was a suspenseful, drama and the scene that was playing had a lot of blood

As you wince at the gore, you quickly decide this is where you’re gonna do the prank lol

“Aww bro look at all that blood.” You say, with a hint of disgust in your voice

Bokutos grip around you loosens, and he quickly goes to look for the remote to pause the tv

He’s looking towards you, with a very large frown on his face

You slightly chuckle “what’s wrong you don’t like the gore?”

“No it’s not that.” He answers still frowning

“Then what is it?” You respond pretending to not know why he’s really upset

“It’s just..... are you mad at me or something?”

You give him a confused look “why would I be mad at you?”

“I don’t know but you always call me babe, or something but just now... you called me bro.”

You’re doing your best to hold back your laughter “bro you sound crazy.”

Now Bokuto is pouting even more than before “aw did you just bro me again?” He dramatically buries his face in his hands “im sorry i made you mad but can you please go back to calling me baby?”

You can’t keep the joke going any further, Bokutos distressed figure is actually making you feel bad

“Baby” you coo as you remove his hands from his face “I’m just kidding, it’s a prank.”

You start laughing out more as you watch Bokuto relax into your touch

He instantly joins in to laugh with you

“Oh my god I can’t believe you got me.”

“I honestly didn’t even think you would notice”

“How could I not, you called me bro!” He replies still laughing a bit

“Why would you think I was mad though?” You question, still chuckling

“Why else would you call me such a terrible name? The only reason I could think of is if you were upset with me.”

You briefly laugh as you lean in to kiss bokuto softly on the lips, he reciprocates right away tightening his hold around your waist

Pulling away from the kiss bokuto speaks again, “do me favor and never call me bro again? I really hated it.”

You lovingly look at your boyfriends face “ oh I promise I won’t, I hated it too.”

He chuckles at your reply as he leans in to kiss you once again

Ushijima Wakatoshi

Ushijima was used to you calling him Toshi or love.

In fact he only ever responded to you when you called him one or the other

One time you called him by his last name and the man deadass unintentionally ignored you

That being said this man is still very stoic and hardly ever shows any reactions

So when you saw this prank you weren’t sure if he would react, the most you were expecting was to be ignored lol

You and Ushijima were out in the store buying some groceries

You were thinking of a good time to causally call him bro and you finally decided to do it when you were at the vegetable aisle

Picking up a giant broccoli you look over to Ushijima, quickly grabbing his attention

“Bro look at this broccoli it’s huge!” You say enthusiastically

Ushijima is staring at you with a blank stare, almost trying to understand the words that just came out of your mouth

“Helllo????” You say waving your hand in front of his face

Ushijima gently grabs your hands and lowers it

Still holding on, he asks in the most serious tone “what did you just call me?”

You’re holding back a smile trying your best to be as serious as you can

“Oh just now??? I said bro”

“Why would you call me that?” He’s looking at you with a confused face

“Because we’re close, people who are close always casually call each other bro”

“But y/n we”re dating.”

“Sooooo??” You say still trying your best not to burst out laughing

“People who are dating don’t call each other bro they call each other cute pet names”

“But you don’t call me any pet names?”

“Babe. I call you babe, that’s a pet name.”

“Well I want you to call me bro.” At this point you’re about to break, this conversation is so funny to you.

“I’m not gonna call you bro. And I don’t want you calling me bro either, I hate that.”

“Come on bro don’t be like that.” You teasingly say letting out a small chuckle

Ushijima once again stares at you, this time he’s evidently unamused

“I won’t respond to you if you keep calling me that.” He says as he begins to walk away

You’re full blown laughing as you run to stop Ushijima from walking away any further

“Toshi wait” you say holding onto his shirt

Ushijima turns around to look at you, still very confused

“I’m totally joking, I would never call you bro. It’s a prank I saw in tik tok.”

Ushijima cracks a soft smile, looking down at you as you laugh

“Thank god, I was so confused by that entire conversation.”

“I could tell, you’ve never looked more lost.”

He gently grabs you to hold you as you guys begin to walk again

“Alright let’s go, we need to finish shopping.”

“Okay love.”

He smiles as he hears the common pet name. That what he loved hearing you call him.

[bestiesenpai]

Lout - Naoya Zenin

Y’all ever seen that movie bad teacher with cameron diaz that would be me as a teacher lol also Naoya is a third year 18+ all that good jazz fun fact I’m actually allergic to minors so yeah even mentioning them breaks me out into hives, it’s disgusting they’re disgusting, would not recommend. 0/10 stars on google review and yelp also femme reader 3.3k words

Content warnings: noncon + dubcon, age gap(reader is obvi gonna be older than naoya lol), teacher x student shit, degradation, choking, noncon video taking, biting, spanking, not a mindbreak necessarily but there’s hints of that here

There was a problem child in your senior class and you weren’t even the main teacher. Stuck as a teaching aid until you could get full certification, it wasn’t even you that really had to bear the brunt of this student's bad behavior should the principal ask. Yet somehow, it was your duty to get him into line before he graduated in a few months.

Naoya Zenin couldn’t even pretend to care about his highschool reputation. All he focused on was being top of the class and making sure everyone knew who exactly was in charge. At an elite private school where his family had been generous donors for generations, Naoya’s behavior was almost expected.

Until he nearly put another student in the hospital after a fight. That was the final straw for disgruntled parents and students alike, causing a massive uproar and demanding action. And of course that call to action fell on your shoulders.

“Seriously? They stuck me with a fucking aide?” Throwing open the door to the office space assigned to you in the meeting, Naoya glared at you. It wasn’t that he particularly disliked you or anything, but he felt slighted that the school didn’t send a real teacher to talk to him.

“Have a seat, Naoya.” Standing up from the desk, you motioned to the lone armchair in the room. Walking in and slamming the door behind him, Naoya rolled his eyes as he flopped into the chair.

“Let’s make this quick, I’ve got a dive team meeting soon.” Looking out at the courtyard below, Naoya squinted against the harsh afternoon sun coming in through the windows. He wasn’t concerned with this meeting at all, wanting it to be over so he can go and impress some Olympic team scouts.

Clearing your throat awkwardly, you rustled the papers on your desk. There were pages of notes on what you were supposed to say, how you were supposed to say it and a few forms Naoya had to sign as well, stating that he’d be on his best behavior until graduation.

“Naoya, you know why you’re here.” You started, unable to meet his pointed gaze as it flicked over to you. “You’re behavior has gotten out of hand and-”

“So what?” Letting his head loll back, Naoya shrugged.

“And you need to be held accountable for your actions.” You pushed through the interruption, feeling your cheeks heat up in indignation.

“Yeah? My family’s had the dean in their pocket since this school was founded, I doubt there’s much I need to be accountable for.”

“You can’t throw money at everything, you know?”

“Why do you think I take judo?”

“Naoya, please.” Pinching the bridge of your nose, you mimicked him for a moment and leaned your head back. “We’re supposed to be having this meeting to reform your behavior. You did a really bad thing, you nearly killed that other student.”

“Reform? The board sent you to reform me? That’s a fucking laugh if I’ve ever heard one.” Letting out a boisterous laugh, Naoya slapped his knee. “How are you going to change me when you can’t even look me in the eye?”

“T-that’s not important.” Embarrassed, you forced yourself to make brief eye contact with him before shuffling your papers around again. “Look, can you just let me say what’s on these papers? Then you can sign them and be on your way.”

“I don’t think I will.” Crossing his arms, Naoya had the nerve to stretch his legs out and prop his feet up on the desk.

“Naoya-”

“I still think it’s hilarious that you’re here of all people. I mean, just look at you!” Gesturing vaguely to your form, Naoya laughed again. “Not even a real fucking teacher yet. Why don’t you go back to the little corner office you have and let the grown ups handle the big stuff?”

“I’m older than you!” This was bad. He was trying to rile you up and it was working. The control you already didn’t have on the situation was getting worse by the minute and both you and Naoya knew that the power balance between you was heavily skewed in his favor.

“Really? I couldn’t tell, you’ve got about as much gusto as an infant.” Giving you a once over, he sneered. “The only thing going for you is your looks and honestly, they could use a little work.”

“Hey!” Now your face was really on fire. Chuckling at your reaction, Naoya sat up a little straighter.

“Don’t get so upset, I know a pair of twins that would be more than willing to help you improve.”

“Can we just focus on the reason we’re here?” You wanted nothing more than for the ground to open up and swallow you whole. The chances of saving this meeting - and your dignity - were slim to none, but you still had to try.

“Right, right, this nonsense about ‘reforming me’.” Using heavy air quotes, Naoya dragged his feet off the desk and let them land on the ground with a loud thud. Taking another look out the windows, he started to undo the tie around his neck.

“Yes. Now, you’re going to sit there and just listen, okay? It’ll only take a few minutes, then you can go on about your day.” You were foolish to believe that you could possibly do anything to Naoya, let alone change his mind on something like this. All the high hopes you’d scrounged together before this meeting were utterly crushed when Naoya stood up.

“No, you listen.” In one fell swoop, Naoya pushed all the papers off the desk, waiting as they all fell to the ground and drinking in your shocked expression. “It’s almost insulting that you think you have any control over this situation, let alone me.”

“Sit back down, Naoya.” Your voice shook terribly as he rounded the desk. You weren’t able to push your chair away fast enough, and he was able to grab onto the back and spin you to face him.

“But teacher, I don’t want to.” He mocked, wasting no time in grabbing you by the throat and forcing you to stand. Clawing at his hand was no use, Naoya’s strength greatly outmatched yours and in just a few moments he was able to manhandle your arms behind your back and use his tie to bind your wrists together.

“Let me go, Naoya!” Thrashing against the desk you were now leaning on for support, a sense of dread filled you. Even if you managed to undo the tie, there was still the issue of actually getting out of the room and away from Naoya, and if his ease in handling you told you anything it was that that task would be impossible.

“Ya know, (Y/N)- can I call you (Y/N)?” He had a stupid grin on his face, pushing you to lean more on the desk as he stood in front of you. “You’ve talked a lot about reform and changing my behavior, but the only one I see here in need of an attitude adjustment is you.”

“Naoya!” Horror ripped through you as he yanked your top open, popping the buttons on your blouse and letting out a whistle at seeing your bra.

“(Y/N), I think you’re violating dress code right now.” Clicking his tongue, Naoya pulled your bra down as far as it would go. “I’ll have to give you a demerit.” Keeping one hand on your throat, Naoya pinched and twisted your nipple between his fingers.

You wouldn’t know it, but Naoya’s heart was beating wildly in his chest. The rush of power he usually got from presiding and dominating the other students was nothing compared to the power he felt now. This wasn’t even something he dreamed about doing, but you’d just given him the golden opportunity to really test his power at this school.

Lurching forward, Naoya sunk his teeth right below your jawline, somewhere he knew you’d have a hard time covering up the mark. The pained squeal you let out went straight to his head and right between his legs, making him bite you in another place and suck harshly on the skin.

Rutting his hips against your thigh, Naoya groaned as he trailed his mouth down your neck, leaving deep teeth marks that he knew would sting when you were alone at night later. Putting one of your nipples in his mouth, Naoya rolled it between his teeth and let drool drip out of his mouth and down your skin.

“Stop it, Naoya! Let me go!” There were strained tears in your eyes that refused to be blinked away. A flurry of slurred protests left your lips as his hand tightened on your neck, enough to have you gasping for air.

“Not until I teach you a little lesson.” He growled, leveling you with a single look. Keeping his grip firm until your eyes rolled back in your head, Naoya let go when he was sure you wouldn’t try to speak again.

Coughing and spluttering, there was little you could do with your fuzzy brain to stop Naoya from turning you around and bending you over the desk. Your face pressed into the hard surface and the wood dug into your face and hips as they were pushed forward.

Grabbing onto your bottoms, Naoya pulled them down until they were at your ankles, unceremoniously ripping off your panties and no doubt shoving them into his pocket. Your heated skin was exposed to the air of the room, making goosebumps pebble on your flesh.

“Ow!” The first slap to your ass was hard and unforgiving, making the tears in your eyes finally fall. “S-stop!” You tried to move your body away from the impending pain but it was no use, Naoya hit your other cheek almost as soon as you started to move.

“What’s wrong, teacher? Never had a bit of corporal punishment?” Laughing haughtily, Naoya grabbed your stinging skin in his hand.

“Ow, ow- N-naoya please, let me go!”

“Not a chance!” Slapping both cheeks in tandem, Naoya could feel the adrenaline going through him. There was no limit to what he could do in this moment, he could walk away and leave you like this, stranded for someone to find. Or, and he liked this option more, he could keep going, and save a few keepsakes for himself.

Fishing his phone out of his pocket, Naoya opened the camera with no hesitation. Taking a video of your heaving body, groping your ass and hips, spreading your cheeks apart to reveal your asshole, Naoya tried to keep the groan coming forward low.

“W-what’re you doing?” You could just barely see him out of the corner of your eye, and your blood ran cold upon realizing what he was doing.

“Say hi.” Shoving the camera in your face, Naoya grabbed your chin to keep you from turning away. “Smile for the camera, (Y/N), don’t cry!”

“No, no, no…” Your career is over. Your life is over. Everything you’d worked so hard for, your education, this job - it was going to be taken away if Naoya decided to share the video. You’d be blacklisted from ever working in a school again and you would definitely face legal trouble for being in this situation with a student.

Leaving you for a moment, Naoya propped his phone up on the windowsill, making sure the camera was capturing the both of you as he went back over. Giving a cheeky little wave to the camera, Naoya turned his attention back to you.

Pushing a hand between your legs, Naoya chuckled darkly at the slick that met the tips of his fingers. It was a miniscule amount, but enough that he could mock you over it. Dragging his fingers through your folds, he presented the fingers to you.

“Who knew Ms. (Y/N) was such a fucking slut?” Rubbing his fingers together, Naoya held his hand up to the camera. “Ms. (Y/N) likes it when I’m rough with her.”

“No...no I don’t.” Sniffling pathetically, you shook your head as best you could.

“Don’t lie, the proof is right here.” Wiping his fingers across your cheek, he made a show of pushing your legs further apart and putting his hand back on your cunt. Pinching your clit, Naoya bit his lip as you let out a high pitch whine.

He knew he’d meet too much resistance if he tried to shove his cock in straight away, so Naoya took it upon himself to prep you a bit. Rubbing your clit in tight circles, he leered over you and watched as you struggled to keep whimpers at bay.

“Don’t be shy, let the camera know how much you like this. We already know how much of a slut you are.”

“I don’t- I don’t like this.”

“Hm? Then why are you getting wet?”

“T-thats-” He had you beat there, the glide of his fingers was getting easier and a distinct wet sound was starting to take shape.

“No need to be shy, teacher. You can tell me you’re just a dumb fucking slut.” Pressing his lips against your ear, Naoya looked at the camera. “I know you see the camera, say it nice and loud for me.”

“No.” Shaking your head, a sharp cry ripped through you as Naoya hit your thigh. From the force of his slap you knew there’d be a hand printed welt on your leg.

“Say it.”

“I-I’m a- a dumb fucking slut!” You sobbed and the strength nearly left your legs entirely. If not for Naoya holding you up you would have tumbled to the floor in shame.

“Now was that so hard?” Standing up straight, Naoya was done stalling. Pushing a finger inside you, he deemed you ready enough to take him and undid the belt on his pants, letting them fall to his ankles.

Taking a second to himself, Naoya ground his clothed cock against your body. This opportunity was something to cherish and he was going to savor every moment of it. Taking a deep breath as pleasure made his spine ripple, Naoya pushed down his underwear and grabbed his cock.

“Teacher, I have a bit of a problem, won’t you fix it?” Naoya teased, rubbing his cock along your slit.

“Wait Naoya, you need protection.”

“Shut up. You’d be lucky to bear a child with Zenin blood, so count this as a gift from me to you.” Putting the tip in, Naoya let his head fall back and gaze down his nose at where your cunt was already sucking him in.

Ignoring your protests, Naoya pushed his cock in all the way, quickly bottoming out and nestling his hips snugly against yours. Planting his hands on the desk to steady himself, he had to take a few deep breaths before beginning to move again.

Putting a hand on the back of your neck to keep you from moving too much, Naoya pulled his hips back, looking at the way his cock glistened with your slick. Breathing hard through his nose, he pushed back in and started a steady rhythm.

“Shit, you’re so tight.” He grunted behind clenched teeth, the hold on your neck getting tighter as he focused on moving his body and not cumming too soon. The clap of his hips against your ass was music to his ears, a sound Naoya was sure not to forget any time soon.

The shame of being fucked by a student was heavy enough on your mind but the shame knowing you were starting to enjoy it was even worse. Keeping your eyes tightly closed, there was little you could do as Naoya pounded into you, the full length of his cock hitting places inside you that hadn’t ever been touched before by previous partners.

“Fuck!” The shout that came out of you was unrestrained, you couldn’t contain yourself as Naoya put his fingers back on your clit. Humiliation covered you like a thick blanket, almost choking you as much as Naoya was.

“I knew you’d come around, (Y/N). No one can resist a Zenin.” Smirking at your scrunched up face, Naoya wrapped his hand fully around your throat and pulled you up until your back was nearly flush with him.

The new angle had a loud moan coming from you and Naoya was close to cumming as well, he could feel his toes start to curl and tingle. His mind was starting to get foggy, and the hold he had was starting to slip from the sweat building up between you.

“Make sure not to waste what I give you, okay? It’s special.”

“You have to pull out, Naoya. You have to!” You couldn’t get pregnant by a student, especially one as high profile as him. Humming against your ear, Naoya shook his head.

“No, I don’t think I will. This is the last part of your attitude adjustment, I need to make sure you remember it.”

“N-naoya- pull out-” You stuttered as your orgasm washed over you, making your back arch and angling your ass perfectly for Naoya to cum as well. Making sure his cock was as deep as possible, Naoya let you fall back onto the desk as he rutted into you.

Biting you on the shoulder one last time, Naoya stayed inside you until his breathing went back to normal and his cock went soft. He had sweat clinging to his body and his uniform was wrinkled beyond belief when he stood up.

Fixing his clothes, Naoya undid the tie around your wrists and watched your arms limply fall to the side. There was no doubt you were sore, he’d given you enough marks to last a week. Smoothing a hand over your still stinging thigh, Naoya stepped away from you and laughed as you fell to the floor.

“Ya know, maybe this meeting was beneficial after all. Wouldn’t you say, teach?” Toeing at your spent body curled up on the floor, Naoya drank you in one last time before going to his phone and ending the video.

Gathering his things and answering a few texts, Naoya grinned as you hobbled to your feet. You avoided looking at him, opting instead to try salvage your own clothes and make sense of the world again. The sun was still shining brightly in the sky and if you held your breath you could hear the distant sound of students on a baseball field.

“Well, I’ll be going now.” Naoya threw open the door, startling you.

“Wait.” Reaching out to him, your eyes went straight to the phone in his hands. “That video-”

“Don’t worry, I won’t show it to anyone, I promise!” Crossing his fingers for dramatic effect, Naoya tucked it away into his back pocket. “Stay out of my way for the rest of the school year, and I’ll delete it when I graduate.”

You couldn’t trust his words and you both knew it. There was no way Naoya would let this be a one time thing, now that he’s gotten a taste for it. He would only continue to take what he wanted from you, making your life hell until he left the school - he wouldn’t let you leave before him.

“Fine.” But it was all you had to go on, so you nodded your head and accepted your fate.

“Fine.” Nodding curtly, Naoya stepped out into the hall with a wide smirk on his face. “See you in class later, Ms. (Y/N).”

[shotorozu]

could you do a pt 2 of the 'he was big, and strong, and his eyes a flaming glow' with deku and shinso please 😳

big and strong (2)

(tiktok trend)

character(s) : midoriya izuku, shinsou hitoshi

legend : [Y/N = your name] they/them pronouns, quirk not mentioned

headcanon type : fluffish-crack and the mildest of spice

note(s) : i’m gonna fix the navigation and masterlists bc it looks REALLY messy rn. and i’m probably going to make a class 1-a x reader masterlist (after i post something later though)

»»————-　♡　————-««

midoriya izuku

you wouldn’t really force izuku to do things like tiktok challenges, because man is working his ass off constantly— so he’s not really on tiktok

but man, your boyfriend is so FINE. izuku midoriya is you just wanted him to do it once, and then never again.

so you immediately go searching for izuku one day, and you find him just chilling in his room.

“oh hi sweetheart! how are you?”

“izuku, could you please do me a favor, just this once?”

izuku, not being opposed to literally any favor you’ve thrown at him so far, was eager to help “sure thing Y/N, what do you want me to do?”

then you show him the video, and he’s like brb.. loading!

he was shook. you want him to do THAT?

okay, and while he already said yes in his mind— he needs a few hours to just think about it. wanting to process what he’s about to do

a few hours later, he comes back to you. “i think.. i’m ready to do it!”

in the first clip, he looked REALLY nerdy omg. you’d never expect him to have literal GAINS under that sweatshirt of his

and in the second clip, he looked so confident?? i mean,, izuku worked hard for that form of his, so he’s not really afraid to show his muscles

but when you’re looking at him like that, while you’re hyping him up— he’ll turn red definitely

the tiktok immediately ends, and you’re just fawning over him, and how he did so good is he in heaven?

then a few moments later, you upload the video— not thinking too much about it because you were about to sleep

but you immediately wake up with your phone EXPLODING with notifications, and you’re just like 👁👁 the video got 350k likes and nearly 1M views

the comments were fawning over him “HE’S NERDY AND MUSCULAR GUYS!!” “where diD YOU GET HIM??” “his freckles. that’s the comment.”

you show izuku the video’s results “izuku, the video did well!”, and he’s just :00 and 👁///👁

“people like me :0”

no, he doesn’t read the comments because they just.. don’t click with him. he’s flattered, but they don’t come from you

“i a-appreciate it but, those comments aren’t from you so..”

SNXJAJSSK i love him

oh and if he was bold enough, he’d literally reply to one of those bold comments with a video of him kissing you with his all 💀

shinsou hitoshi

he’s on tiktok, but he doesn’t look at every single video that’s on his fyp. so the chances of him knowing this challenge is a 50/50

ever since he started training and preparing for the hero course, he became a lot more toned.

and you don’t really force shinsou to do challenges with you bc what are the chances he already knew of them anyway-

but your boyfriend is attractive attractive. you just want him and his seggsy ass to do it just once

so— during one of your hangouts together, you bring it up. “can you do this, hitoshi?”

and he’s like 🙄 not again *feining annoyance*

then he watches the video, and hitoshi’s just SMIRKING at you, as if the video was funny whdnwndka “so you want me to do it?”

“please?”

okay, so since you said please, he’s gonna do it “fine, since you asked so nicely” even if you didn’t, he’d still do it especially after seeing that curious expression on your face

you were just sitting in the back while he filmed the tiktok, the first clip making him look busted as hell

and in the second clip, you were APPALLED by his gainz and muscles

after filming the tiktok, you speak “hitoshi, wtf are you so hot?”

with the corner of his lips turning up slightly, he pulls you closer to him.

you posted the tiktok before you went to bed, and just left it at that. but hitoshi being a literal insomniac, HEARD your tiktok notifications going off

he just placed your phone on silent though, not wanting to disturb you

the next day, you check the tiktok— and it has 600k likes and 900k views within the first 8 hours.

the comments were a mix of “DAMNN AND HE HAS EYEBAGS TOO!” “his hands. that is all,” “i wasn’t expecting that 😳” and “LMAO THEIR FACE IN THE BACKGROUND” “if i was dating him, i’d be shook too.”

shook, you show your boyfriend “hitoshi, you’re famous. how did you not hear the notifications?”

“i did,” he chuckled as he went to look at the results of his tiktok, an arm slinged across your shoulders— looking slightly impressed by the video’s results

he could care less about the simp comments, like.. thanks but they are not anywhere near the compliments that come from you

but when the comments are talking about taking HIM from YOU, he decided to be petty— and respond to one of those comments with a video of him squished in between your thighs 😳 as he should tbh

»»————-　♡　————-««

likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading!

i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei. i only own the writing and i do not profit off of my hobby

do not plagiarize, repost, modify, or use my works for audio readings without my permission :))

[after-witch]

Emotional Loan [Yandere Ransom Drysdale x Reader]

Title: Emotional Loan [Yandere Ransom Drysdale x Reader]

Synopsis: You shouldn’t be this nervous about telling your boyfriend that you want to transfer to a college out of state. Ransom is nothing if not generous with you--so why is your stomach in knots?

Word Count: 3144

notes: yandere, sexism, emotional abuse

You shouldn’t be this nervous. Really. Ransom has been nothing but generous with you, and in turn you’ve been patient--maybe too patient, maybe too forgiving, sometimes--with him. It’s only fair that he extends that patience to you, especially with something as serious, as important, as your future.

So why does the thought of telling him about your plan to switch to a new college make you feel like you’re going to throw up?

You puff out your cheeks and stretch your arms across the breakfast table, leaning down and wishing you could ask someone else to tell him in person. But the thought is ridiculous, and you push it away in favor of rehearsing what you’re going to say for the millionth time since you made up your mind.

You will tell him about the need to change your degree if you want to ever be in the contending for a museum curator position in the future. You will tell him about the fact that the best place to get this specific degree, the one that will put you right in the open arms of the internship that leads to your dream curator field, is in California. You will tell him about the apartments you’ve already inspected. You will tell him about the fact that he can visit anytime, that you will visit him, that you can text and video call and vacation together. You will tell him that you love him and you want to make this work.

You will tell him all these things… and yet. Yet while you can rehearse the words, rehearse how you’ll push your printed out papers showing exactly what you need to do and why towards him so he can see you’re telling the exact truth, you can’t rehearse how Ransom will react. You try to imagine, but all that comes up is a blurry, grey blank.

Is he going to freak out? Get pissed? Or worse--not care at all? Maybe you’ve overestimated how much Ransom has invested in this relationship. Maybe he’d rather cut you loose than deal with a long distance relationship. Maybe the second you mention that you’ll be moving to California, he’ll be mentally checking a list for someone local to hook up with the minute you’re gone.

You’re not sure which reaction would scare you more.

But you don’t have much time to think about it, because you hear him padding down the stairs, hear the din of some video he’s still watching, probably whatever he put on while he was in the shower. You can’t bear to look up, and you thumb aimlessly, nervously around your phone’s apps while you listen to the sound of him scraping the eggs and bacon you’d cooked onto a plate.

He plops down in the seat across from you and you glance up. He catches your eye and gives a tight-lipped, tired smile. He was out late. But he’d texted you about staying out late earlier in the evening, so you didn’t feel you had the right to be mad--that’s the condition you’d given him, after all, when he’d accused you of being controlling. When he’d called you a nag and accused you of being jealous of other women, women he had no feelings for.

“I just want to know when you’re going to be out late so I don’t stay up half the night thinking you’re dead somewhere.” And so he did--let you know--and you swallowed down your feelings of suspicion at his late night adventures.

Maybe… maybe this is a bad time to tell him. Maybe you should wait for a day when he’s had more sleep. Maybe you should run your thoughts by someone else, get a second opinion. You’re focusing on the table, on the light from the phone screen, anything to avoid looking up and starting the dreaded conversation.

“What’re those papers for, babe?”

Shit.

Your hands tremble just a bit when you set the phone down, and the way it vibrates against the table mimics the way your stomach feels right now. You suck in a breath and look up, but you can’t make eye contact just yet and you push the words out, stumbling and breathy and rapid, without stopping to breathe until you’ve said your peace.

“Ransom this is really hard for me but we need to talk about something and I don’t want you to be mad but I need to change schools if I’m ever going to get a shot at a curator position and the best school for this is in California and I know it’s going to be hard but I love you--I love you and we can make long distance work if you want and if you don’t want well--well I don’t know what I’ll do then but I just wanted to let you know now because I’ve got to turn in my application next week and please please try to see this from my point of view because it’s all I’ve ever wanted and you know that.”

You take a shaky breath and hold your hands together on top of the table, clasped and shaking from the adrenaline and anxiety coursing through you. You look up at Ransom with trepidation, hoping that he’s not mad--or indifferent.

But he’s neither. He simply looks… confused.

He simply stares at you for a moment, a dumbfounded expression on his face as he processes all of the words that just came rapid-fire out of your mouth.

“California?” Is all he says, finally.

You take the opportunity to push the stack of printed papers towards him. “These are… it’s… well, emails from people in the industry, some important articles about getting positions at museums. About where you have to go. Oh, there’s apartment listings there, too.” You even printed out detailed information about the qualifications for acceptance, and put them in a neat little table next to your own academic and experience record. You were a shoo-in, and you didn’t feel the need to be humble about it.

He grabs the stack and starts thumbing through, not saying another word as he seemingly thoroughly reads everything you’ve printed out. Your stomach feel like floating lead, heavy and flipping. You can’t tell what he’s thinking or feeling, and he’s not giving you anything but a concentrated look at he looks through the statements, the listings, the plan you’ve outlined so neatly.

He finally sets the stack back down and simply stares at it for a few moments. Taking it in. Taking his thoughts in. Finally, Ransom looks up at you and the intensity in his eyes makes your stomach drop. He doesn’t look mad. He looks--and you hate it--disappointed, sad even.

“Look…” He sighs, eyebrows lifting as his gaze drifts away before settling back on you. “I’m not going to lie and pretend I’m okay with this. I’m not. Jesus, babe. California? Four years?”

“It’s no--” you interrupt, but he holds up his hand and you stop.

“But. But, but,” he lightly pounds his fist on the stack of tables, an almost nervous gesture in your eyes. “It’s what you want? What you need for your career? There’s no other way for you to get this--” he waves his hands around, “museum gig you’re after?”

You nod, unable--no, afraid--to speak, in case your voice is too tight with emotion.

“Then I guess I can deal with it.”

“What?” You blurt the words out.  You expected… an argument. Or for him to blow you off, make it seem like you weren’t serious. Or, as you’d admitted to yourself earlier, for him to throw you away and find someone who wouldn’t make him wait around. Not… acceptance.

He laughs at your reaction and your stomach feels lighter, the tension in your body starting to fizzle away. “

“It’s not like I have to worry about getting the money to come visit, right? And hey,” he continues, “if you need someone to put in a good word to this school… maybe throw some cash at a dean or something…” He raises his eyebrows, wiggling them a little in a way that makes you snort.

You lean forward and nab one of the lukewarm pieces of scrambled eggs from his plate and pop it into your mouth. “Since you’re offering to help, I could use someone to check over my application…”

**

The envelope is too small. It’s way too small. Why did they make the envelope so damn small? Maybe the acceptance letter was sent on its own, and all of the other information--the giant packet telling you where to send payments and sign up for courses--would be sent to your email. But the thought of checking your email and seeing nothing makes you feel sick, so you keep your phone next to you on the table.

“You gotta open it,” Ransom says, soft and casual. He doesn’t move from his place beside you on the sofa, watching you with a neutral look. He probably knows why the envelope is too small, but he won’t say the words out loud--just like you won’t. If you say it out loud, then it’s true.

There's nothing else for you to do except confront the truth, and you rip open the envelope and pull out the folded paper with far too few printed words on the page.

Rejected. Outright. Completely. Not a fit for the school or the program.

If you weren’t sitting on the couch, you would have fallen over. As it is,  you feel like the world is collapsing, like the sofa underneath you is melting into the floor and taking you with it.

“I don’t understand.” You can only manage to whisper, voice small--reflecting the way the rest of you feels. Small and falling and stupid.

Ransom takes the paper from your hand, and you don’t bother keeping a grip on it. You register the fact that he’s put an arm around your shoulders, but you can barely feel it through the numbness of rejection.

“What the fuck,” he says, voice louder next to your ear. It makes you shrink in more, even though his anger isn’t directed at you. “What the fuck.”

It’s you want to say, what you would say, if you had the strength. The energy. But the absolute, complete way that your future has suddenly become an unknown blank has left you stuck and heavy.

It doesn’t make sense. Your transcript was perfect--should have been perfect. You should have gotten in. You got top grades and references from professors and a list of relevant experiences that most students wouldn’t have until the end of their degree.

“I’m going to call them and find out what-the-fuck,” Ransom says suddenly, getting up with a jerking motion and walking towards the kitchen, where his phone rests on the counter. “No,” he says, clicking his tongue. “Better yet. I’ll call my grandfather. He’ll know how to convince this so-called top school that they made a big mistake.”

The thought makes your head spin. “Ransom, don’t.” You’re not a child. But you feel like one, like you just failed a math quiz and your dad is calling to find out why the teacher doesn’t know the quiz answers from his ass. “You can’t just call a school and make them accept someone.”

Your legs feel wobbly when you stand up, and Ransom practically swoops back to your side to hold you steady. He leads you back down on the sofa and you feel yourself accepting the loss, accepting that your dream is gone, or at least altered.

He squeezes an arm around you when you finally begin to cry, and for the moment you feel better, less worthless, less hopeless. It was just one rejection. One egg. You can’t put every egg in one basket, as they say.

You rest your head against his shoulder and sigh into it, enjoying the warmth and closeness. A feeling of luck pings at your heart. You’re really lucky to have a guy like Ransom. He’s not perfect, and sometimes you fight, and sometimes he does things that hurt you, but--are you perfect? Do you do things that hurt him, too? Don’t put all your eggs in one basket, and don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.

With comfort comes clarity. The world isn’t ending. Your future isn’t blank. There are other options.

You feel almost perked up when you speak: “I guess I can apply to other schools. Maybe it won’t be the exact one I wanted but… there’s some in Chicago, even Michigan, that might work.”

Ransom’s arm tightens around you, slightly but firmly enough to notice.

“Babe, you’re not serious.”

You pull back enough to look up at his face.

“What do you mean?”

You can see Ransom fighting with his annoyed expression, trying to soften it up. You dimly recognize that you should be grateful--you know how snarky he can get with others when he’s not putting on a filter.

“Your transcript was fucking impeccable. I saw it! I sent it in for you! And you still didn’t get in. You think these other schools are going to accept you….” He trails off, leaning his head back, looking disappointed of all things. Disappointed in you? Or the school?  You can’t tell. All you know is that it makes you feel low again, like you’re nothing, falling into the floor with a sense of worthlessness.

“I’m not tryin’ to be an asshole,” he says, and there’s a flicker of doubt in your mind about the truth of that statement. “I’m just trying to be honest. I don’t want you to have to deal with getting rejected from all those other schools, too. You know what I mean?”

You swallow down against the tightness in your throat. “Their standards might not be as strict. I know they’re not as strict. I could get in.”

He looks down at you, the same intense gaze from the morning that you told him about your plan on his face. The gaze that let you know he believed in you and would do anything--even go long distance for almost half a decade--for you. A gaze that let you know he was serious, honest, giving you his thoughts with an open heart. “Keyword. Could.”

It’s like a slap to the face.

“Are you saying I’m too stupid to get in anywhere?” You start to pull away, but his arms don’t let up and so all you can do is turn your head away, cheeks hot with humiliation. “Don’t you support me?”

“Jesus, no--and Jesus, yes.” Annoyance is bleeding into his voice and you wish you’d just ripped up the envelope and avoided the entire conversation. You keep your eyes on the floor, humiliating tears blurring your vision as you stare at the sliver of a stain from soda that you never got out of the cream colored rug.

“You are the smartest chick I know,” he says, voice a little softer, now. At least he’s trying to stop being an ass. “Seriously, you are. Maybe you’re just a--a different kind of smart. A  kind of smart these schools don’t give a shit about. Do something here with that smartness, then. Stay where you’re at. Fuck, talk to the dean and tell them you want to to an independent degree or something. But don’t get your heart broken a million times when you could just make the most of what you’ve got here.” He squeezes, affectionate. “What we’ve got here.”

It’s not what you want. It’s not viable. You can’t get to where you want to be if you stay where you are. But he’s right--he’s right, isn’t he, because if you can’t get into a school with a nearly picture-perfect record and recommendations and experience oozing out of your ears, will there be any school that accepts you?

And if you stay here, Ransom is here, and you’re already in school here, and maybe you won’t get anywhere near a curator position (but you want to, it’s your dream, why give up on your dream?) but you can do something else, surely. Ransom will help you, like he always does. You might fight and argue and sometimes it gets intense but he always lends you a shoulder to cry on, doesn’t he? He’s always honest with you, even when it hurts. Even when it hurts like this, crushing and disappointing and sharp.

He pulls you closer to him, and this time you don’t fight as you rest your head back on his shoulder.

“So?” He starts to gently stroke your hair, the way he knows you like it.

You nod, sniffling against the last of the tears, unable--afraid--to say anything. 

“That’s my girl,��� he says, before gently flicking your forehead and reaching for his phone. “Hey, let’s go see a movie tonight. My treat.”

You nod against his shirt, unable to do more than mumble back, “Okay.” Okay, okay, okay. It’s a soft, unceremonious end to your California dreams.

[solliewriter]

Archery for Writers

In this post, I'll basically tell you the small stuff: e.g., what your archer will complain about to other archers, how different bows sound, what it's like shooting in the rain or snow, finding the goddamn arrows, etc. I’m also going into technical details and will discuss the legendary Robin Hood shot.

If you want a good basic primer, T.S. Strange on Instagram did a pretty good job https://www.instagram.com/p/COat-W1rQ7o/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

But, if you're ready for beyond the basics, I've got you covered.

To be clear, my knowledge of archery is primarily Western traditional archery. PLEASE research the history of the type of bow you choose as they’re all unique. There’s a reason why Mongolian bows are so different than English longbows.

I have primarily shot in thick, brushy forest (not parks, actual wilderness), so when you read, that I'm talking about that setting unless specified. My favored bow is a reflex/deflex, which is basically a recurve/longbow hybrid. I have also been doing archery for as long as I can remember, so yes I know how to shoot.

SOUNDS

Different bows make different sounds. Recurve bows are loud. They make this twangy sound when you use them, unless you put a silencer on the string. This silencer is usually a fluff-type thing that is woven around and through the string. The silencer doesn't make them perfectly silent. It's more of a muffler than a silencer.

Longbows are quieter, but they still make noise. It's short, grunt-like hum that usually only the archer and their immediate compatriots can hear.

For Your Character (FYC): a recurve archer and a longbow archer will very likely pester each other about noise.

SIGHT, pt1

You can shoot blind. Sorta. No, you can't put on a blindfold and still hit your target, but you can and will extrapolate what you see. As mentioned, I've done almost all of my shooting in the forest, in the mountains. Visibility is  less than perfect. You have to aim through hundreds of branches, and the likelihood of hitting a branch and sending your arrow flying into No Man's Land is very likely as a beginner and amateur. Shooting through the forest isn't like in Lord of the Rings or Hunger Games, unless that forest is a well maintained park with marked trails made by things other than deer and bear. (FYI, bear trails are perfect for humans.) Half the time, if you move an inch the wrong way, your arrow will be way off target. Missing by an inch means missing by several feet, which is really far in archery.

More than once, you see your target at one angle, but can't shoot it at another. I've experienced this frequently because my Viking sized dad will pick targets that I, his 5'2" daughter, am too short to see. I have to stand on tip toes to see his target, then lower myself into almost a crouch to shoot. I still hit the target.

FYC: Besides the obvious banter that comes from discussing height differences, there are a few other things to note. In the forest, it can be hard to find two good angles to shoot something. This can lead to frustration, complaining, attempts to get the other archer out of the way, and etc.

SIGHT, pt 2

I’m talking about recurve/longbows, so there are no actual sights to look through. 

This is where things are controversial. There’s a gap shooting and an instinctive shooting. Gap shooters guess the distance, then aim. Instinctive shooters just sorta ... wing it.

I’m not going to throw shade at either method. But here’s a key reason why one would use one style or another: gap shooting is largely ineffective in mountainous, forested terrain when you can’t really see much. So, if you have an archer from a prairie and an archer from the mountains, it’s likely they use different aiming styles.

Side note: Flu-flu shots are unique and fun shots that use big feathery arrows. You shoot nearly straight up in hopes of getting your arrow on top of the target rather than straight toward it. When doing this, you can either look at the target or look at your arrow angle, but you can't do both at the same time. You have to shoot blind. Flu-flu shots aren't good for killing creatures, but they are pure fun. This is a good example of using instinctive shooting rather than gap shooting. Also, flu-flu shots are prone to being highly effective by the wind, and it’s very easy to get them stuck in a tree for all eternity. There’s a shooting area my roving family calls “The Valley of Lost Flu-Flu’s.” It’s called this for very good reason.

SMELLS

Bows don't smell, unless you've just added beeswax to the string (strings fray, wax stops that). Arrows smell for about a day after you paint them and glue them.

Leather, however, smells and remains smelly forever. I personally like the smell (though I suppose I'm actually smelling the oil, not the leather). It's very hard to describe, partially because I have so many memories involved. Unfortunately, I have to leave this to you. Just note, leather from armguards, quivers, and pouches don't smell the same as couches and your typical urbanite materials. Find your hippie friend and ask them to make you a leather bracelet or something. That'll teach you the smell.

FYC: Your archer will have very strong memories associated with the smell of leather and beeswax. They will be warm fuzzy memories.

TOUCH, aka shooting in the cold weather

All right, it's cold, and your character is wearing a big coat. Big, puffy sleeves to fit all those layers beneath. No biggie, just nock the arrow, draw, and shoot ...

FWAP!

The string hits the character's coat sleeve. The arrow goes about ten feet before falling limp to the ground like a sad puppy.

To fix this, you need to tie a thick band around your character's sleeve. Easy peasy.

Now, your OC tries shooting again. Unfortunately, it’s been raining, so to their dismay, they've noticed that their turkey fletchings (standard in the western US states) have flattened and shrunk. It looks like there is barely any fletching at all. Fear not, the arrow will still fly. It'll just make aiming a bit harder, but not terribly worse. Those fletchings are just stabilizers.

Your OC goes home. When they take off their shooting glove/tab, they notice their fingers are yellow. Oh no! Don't worry, your OC is not sick, the dye has just come off the leather in the rain. It'll wash off, but it'll probably happen every time the leather gets wet for the next few months unless your OC makes a new glove/tab that isn't dyed.

LEFTIE VS RIGHTIE

It is extremely uncommon to find a left-handed archer. This is because even if someone’s right-handed doing their day-to-day things, it doesn’t mean they’re going to be right-handed for archery.

In archery, whether you shoot left or right handed is determined by your eye dominance. Most people are right-eyed dominant, so much so it’s very hard for a left-eye dominant archer (such as myself) to find new bows. And I mean really hard. Go anywhere and there’s a severe shortage of left-dominant archery gear simply because it’s that rare (hah I’m special- jk).

BOWS

There are manufactured bows (lame), and there are good bows. Yes, there’s a huge difference.

I’m not sure of the technical terms, but here’s my experience.

Manufactured bows, i.e., the cheap bows you find at a renaissance fair, are typically made from a type of plastic. Good traditional bows, from almost any country, are custom-made from wood that the bowyer (bow-maker) has shaped, treated, and glued.

Bows are a lot like musical instruments. Essentially, manufactured bows (or guitars, violins, etc.) are poor quality because they’re made of cheap materials which make the shooting quality less than superb (more on that later), and because they aren’t given the attention they need, which makes them of lesser quality because they’re just ... eh. Special treatment makes for a better bow.

Like musical instruments, there are a lot of different types. Most websites say there are only four (recurve, longbow, compound, and crossbow), but that’s not quite true. These acknowledge the four general shapes of a bow, but not the subtypes. For example, Mongolian bows are recurves, but tend to be shorter than Western recurves because Mongolian recurves are meant to be shot on horseback.

SHOOTING QUALITY 

So, what is it like shooting a good bow?

Again, I’m speaking from experience with recurves, longbows, and reflexes.

A good bow has good speed. It moves the arrow faster than slower. This is a relative scale because recurves shoot arrows faster than longbows, and reflex/deflex tend to shoot faster than longbows but slower than recurves.

WEIGHT

Is it possible for people to have pulled 100 pounds of weight in a bow back in the olden days, or are people just confused?

Yes, it’s possible.

My dad, who used to do archery once or twice a week, had a 100 pound bow that he shot fairly regularly. That was before his shoulder injuries and, y’know, age. 

Also note that he’s practically a Viking.

I pulled 50 pounds at 28 inches when I was doing it regularly, although now I probably have to go back to 45 pounds.

BASIC SHOOTING FORM

This is going to be heavily effected by your character’s culture, bow, and upbringing.

There’s the English, upright stance for shooting a longbow. The archer stands very straight, and their pull hand goes to anywhere between the lip and the ear.

There’s the forest stance, which is my own, and that’s slightly bent over to avoid string-slaps, finger to cheekbone. Also, I made up the forest stance, so don’t Google it.

Then there’s Walt Wilhem, who, due to physical disability, had to shoot from the hip and was still one of the best archers in the world. Watch the video of him and his brother:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=np8u69YfSA8

THE ROBIN HOOD SHOT

This is actually very attainable. I’ve done it six times. My dad has done it about 30 times. I have a friend who did it about 25 times.

In order for this situation to realistically happen (if you’re writing something unrealistic, you really shouldn’t bother reading all of this), the character needs to prep a few things.

1. Years of experience. At least six, and that’s assuming your archer shoots at least seven hours a week, without missing an hour.

 2. At six years the archer might get a few Robin Hood shots. Very likely, it’ll be at a shorter distance and the arrow they’re shooting will be cross-wise instead of straight down the shaft.

3. At ten years, it’s quite likely your Robin Hood has shot straight down the shaft a few times.

4. Your Robin Hood must seek to improve every week.

SOME QUICK TIPS

unless you’re Walt Wilhem, you always pull from your back, not your arm

you never fire an arrow

back quivers are quieter and more mobile than hip quivers (suck it hipsters)

it takes practice and long fingers, but it’s quite doable to hold both a bow and an arrow in one hand while shooting

there is a system for very fast nocking 

beginners have no clue what this system is and so take several minutes to nock their arrow.

contrast, it takes a second for an experienced archer.

someone who doesn’t take long to aim is often called a snap shooter, and this isn’t exactly complimentary.

This ought to take you far in your journey of writing an archer. I’ve been sitting on this post for about a year now, but still need to add to it. PLEASE google the following in case I don’t get to sharing the info.

arrow breakage

bow breaking

materials for arrows

types of wood for bows

types of wood for arrows

arrow spine weight

bow tuning

bow shelfs

different forms

holding a bow

stringing a bow

bow at rest

temperatures + bows

fletching types

aerodynamics 

quivers

moving around

how to find the goddamn arrows

[kikyan]

The Forbidden Fruit

Yandere Light Yagami x Female! Reader 

“ Don’t worry [Y/N], my brother is amazing at studying! We can ask him some questions and you’ll understand it also immediately!!” Sayu said as she walked inside her nice decorative home with [Y/N] following behind. She took off her shoes and put on slippers, with [Y/N] following her actions. Sayu went to the kitchen where her mom was preparing a meal to fully satisfy the family during dinner and their little guest. 

“ Hey, Mom! Is light home yet? Me and [Y/N] need help with our homework!” 

Turning to face Sayu, she removed the ladle from the steaming pot and tilted her head to ponder on a suitable answer. 

“ He isn’t, I think he has cram school today. He’ll be a bit late so why don’t you guys get started on it now and skip over the ones you don’t know? I’m sure by the time he arrives you’ll be finished with a majority of it!” 

“ Hm. . .Okay! Wait, [Y/N] how long can you stay?” 

“ The latest I can stay is around 8. I live 3 blocks from here so I should be fine staying this late.” 

“ Oh, then you can stay for dinner! In the meantime, let’s go to my room!” 

[Y/N] and Sayu ran to her room, Sayu loudly speaking moving about grabbing pens and pencils as she sat down on her bed. Instead of doing her homework, she grabbed a nearby magazine and examined its contents. 

“ Hey, [Y/N]! Come look at this!” 

“ What happened to homework Sayu?” 

“ Later! My big brother will help us so don’t worry! Hey, come look at this though! Isn’t it pretty?” 

[Y/N] simply turned away with a pout on her face. She sighed as she reached into her backpack and pulled out her homework and began to work on it by herself. Sayu put her magazine down before chirping a small, “When you finish let me see the answers” and picked up where she left off.

[Y/N] grumbled a small, ‘ if you aren’t going to help then neither will I’ before focusing on a question. Sayu whined loudly before placing the magazine down and joining her friend on the floor. 

“ Fine, if you want to do homework, we can do homework.” 

“ Good, that is what I came here to do.” 

“ You’re no fun.” 

Sayu eventually gave in and began to do homework with [Y/N], stumped on some of the problems they ignored them. The front door was opened and soon enough Light entered the room as Sayu let out a happy gasp as she turned to [Y/N], “ Brothers home! You know what that means!” 

“ Sayu, while we may need help you shouldn’t use your brother like that.” 

“ Oh c’mon, he is super smart and top of his class, he doesn’t mind helping!” 

“ Sayu. . .” 

[Y/N] kept an emotionless expression as they witnessed Sayu running down the stairs with glee. [Y/N] felt that the least they could do was accompany Sayu to greet her older brother. Once [Y/N] walked downstairs, regret was deep inside their soul when Sayu made eye-contact with her friend. 

“ Oh Light! Here, this is my friend [Y/N]!” 

“ Oh hello. It’s nice to meet you.” 

Light replied with a small smile as he turned to his mother who asked him about his grades and he replied with handing her a parchment in which his mother gasped at seeing them. A smile of delight played on her face as she tilted her head cutely. [Y/N] just turned away and nodded. Light was a bit tired, but he did not fail to see the strange expression on [Y/N]’s face as she looked at him. 

“ I know my brother is popular but jeez [Y/N], drool much?” 

“ Your brother is strange.” 

“ If you mean strange in that he studies a lot then yes!” 

With a laugh, Sayu turned away to return back to her room. 

“ Isn’t he supposed to be helping us? I don’t think mocking him will do you any good, Sayu.” 

Sayu gasped as she ran to Light’s room to apologize. [Y/N] sighed before grabbing her things, it was close to her curfew even though Sayu rarely did anything. Light’s mom smiled as she walked closer to [Y/N]. 

“ Say, aren’t you hungry dear? Dinner is ready, why don’t you get Sayu and Light and come down to eat? Have a bite before you leave, sweetie.” 

“ Are you sure? I don’t want to impose.” 

“ Nonsense dear! Any friend of Sayu is welcome here! My husband for once won’t be working that late, it’s rare to see everyone together so this will be great!” 

[Y/N] felt a bit strange, her choice clearly had an impact, but still, she would feel even worse for not accepting. She ran upstairs, opening the door to Sayu’s room and shaking her head when she didn’t see her. She went to Light’s room and knocked on the door, after hearing a small ‘  Come in’ from the other side did she open the door. She saw Light in a black long-sleeved shirt and his dress pants. Sayu was begging him to help her with her homework, even pointing to you and saying that you were having difficulties with it as well. 

“ Well. . . if [Y/N] is also struggling then I could offer to help.” 

“ Why does she get special treatment?” 

“ What do you mean, if she knew how to do it then you could just ask her, but if you both need help then I can help you both.” 

“ Sayu, Light, your mother says that dinner is ready and that your father is coming home soon, also, I taught you how to do it Sayu, you just didn’t listen.” 

Before she could even say anything, the moment the door was open, Sayu, bolted out of the door and ran to greet her father. [ Y/N ] stood there, confused momentarily before shaking her head once again and staring at the door. 

“ Sorry, Sayu is a handful at times.” 

“ More like all the time, no offense.” 

“ None taken, though I think we shouldn’t tell her that.” 

“ Maybe so, is Sayu close with her father?” 

“ That’s just her typical reaction to anything really, besides we rarely see our father so I guess her behavior is acceptable.” 

“ I see, does he work often?” 

“ Yes he does, he is a police officer.” 

“ Oh, I see. Anyway dinner is ready, your mother asked me to tell you.” 

“ I’ll be down in a second.” 

[Y/N] nodded, turning away slightly until she laid eyes on a black notebook. It was strange, wasn’t expected of Lights aesthetic, but she didn’t question much about it. Light turned to his notebook before hiding it away and turning to face the door. 

‘ Her friend seems to be perceptive. . . I should be fine if I keep up with the appearance of a good role model citizen.’ 

Light finished his business and went downstairs to where they were all gathered around the table and waiting for Light. Once he made his way to the table, they consumed the meal that was prepared for them, light talk in between bites. 

“ So dad, this is a rare sight. Is everything okay at the station?” 

“ Yeah. . . I can’t say much but this case is putting a big scare on everyone. We’ve never had anything like the Kira case before.” 

“ Kira?” 

[Y/N] perked up at name and everyone was a bit surprised to see that she was a bit unaware of the situation. 

“ You aren’t aware of the news?” 

“ Gosh [Y/N] the whole school talks about it!” 

“ I’m sorry for not paying attention to what they say, most of the time no one has anything worth listening to.” 

A deep, loud laugh was heard as Sayu’s dad chuckled a bit, before turning to Sayu, “ I think I like your friend a lot more Sayu.” 

Light cleared his throat before proceeding, “ Kira is more of a vigilante, he is known for “cleaning up” the streets by killing the criminals in it. Essentially, he is taking justice into his own hands. It wasn’t until the detective known as L broadcasted a video feed that he determined that he only needed a face and a name to kill. The internet is full of information like that, I’m also surprised you didn’t hear about it.” 

[Y/N] paid more attention when ‘L’ was mentioned, she started to deduce her own ideas inside. Sayu looked at her friend and with a snarky smile, “ So, are you team Kira or L?” 

“ Sayu!” 

“ Sayu, we talked about this!” 

“ What, I wanted to see what it was.” 

“ It doesn’t matter, your father is on this case so it’s disrespectful!” 

“ No, it’s alright, anyone is entitled to their opinion. It doesn’t change the fact that we are determined to stop Kira.” 

Light stared at his father and his expression, this did not go unnoticed by [Y/N]. She finished her meal and went to wash the plate. 

“ Oh dear, please don’t worry about the plate. I can do that.” 

“ So can I ma’am, it’s the least I can do in exchange for all the kindness you showed me.” 

[Y/N] finished washing her plate and grabbed her bag, thanking the family and putting her shoes on. Sayu’s mother walked to the entrance and thanked [Y/N] for being Sayu’s friend and for everything she has done. [Y/N] nodded and thanked the woman for her kindness and hospitality.

“ It’s late, Light can walk you home. Can’t you Light?” 

“ No, that’s okay. I don’t want to impose-” 

“ Nonsense, he would be happy to take you. Just a moment, Light sweetie? Can you take [Y/N] home?” 

Light nodded before grabbing his coat and headed outside with [Y/N]. As they were walking, silence fell upon them like snow, until Light attempted to lighten the mood and start small talk. 

“ Thank’s for looking after Sayu, ever since she met you she has been more excited.” 

“ You can say it, she’s been more annoying huh?” 

“ Well, I wouldn’t put it like that. . .” 

“ It’s okay, besides, it’s Sayu I should be thanking. I recently moved here, and it was Sayu who helped me make friends. I know I don’t look it, sound it, or am that person, but I care a lot for her.” 

With a soft smile, Light looked at [Y/N] before continuing his talk. It wasn’t until a bit later did they talk about Kira. 

“ I know that we were a bit loud back there, but I want to hear your opinions, who do you go for?” 

“ Oh, the L and Kira talk, well, it sounds to me that Kira is doing everyone a favor and killing the criminals, the crime rate will go down from the looks of it, with everyone fearing it, but I think that too much power can get into Kira’s head and he can start hurting innocent people. I don’t have enough information on them to make a decision, but I know that L is a good detective, he might find Kira, or Kira can upstage him, who knows. Personally, I think that he isn’t setting a good example, he kills other while he hates them killing. Ironic really. I have different opinions on both, but I wouldn’t call myself a Kira or L supporter just yet.” 

“ I see, I would love to hear your thoughts when you do!” 

“ Okay. . . anyway’s this is my house, thanks for walking me back. Thank your mom for the meal and tell Sayu that I wrote her how to solve the problems on her sticky note.” 

“ I will, it was nice meeting you!” 

“ Likewise. . “ 

Both separated, Light went home and [Y/N] inside hers. It was dark and cool, she went into her room and looked out the window, Light was walking and for some reason, his lips were moving? Was he talking to himself? His lips were more like, trying to remain quiet, there was no one around and it gave the impression that he was being too cautious. Just what was Light Yagami? 

~~ 

It was a normal day, like any other, someone else died so it was whatever at this point. [Y/N] sighed as she sat in her chair and focused on the board, it was hard to remain awake. Sayu noticed this and leaned over to whisper, “ Didn’t get much sleep?” 

“ Pay attention Sayu, I can’t come over everyday can I?” 

“ Well no, but I should be fin-!?” 

Sayu panicked when the teacher slammed her desk before continuing her discussion, Sayu sent [Y/N] a sour expression as [Y/N] laughed. She stayed up all night this week to read up on the Kira case, L, the killings, everything. It sounded like Kira has a power that is strange to everyone, but they had limits. If anything, she was leaning more towards the L side of anything. Someone who thinks that they have infinite power will more than likely think of themselves as highly. She was just waiting for a chance to prove that. While she didn’t participate in them, she lingered whenever someone wanted to argue about the cases to hear their opinion, in short, they suck. 

She was walking one weekend, she came back from the store when she saw Light in town. He was just leaving as well so he decided to walk with her. She was thankful enough and the small talk turned into a conversation, at first he asked a bit about her thoughts and that was when she revealed some of them. 

“ What I fear is Kira straying off his ideology and hurting others, other than that I don’t have many issues with him. L is more entertaining in my opinion, this whole battle is.” 

“ Oh, well I see. What do you think Kira’s end goal is?” 

“ A better society, that’s why he is getting rid of the criminals at least, I only hope it’s only bad guys.” 

After a short conversation, they encountered a small dog as [Y/N] went to pet it, for some reason the dog was fixed on Light. 

“ I think the dog likes you Light.” 

“ You think so?” 

“ He seems to like staring at you, or more like someone next to you, but there is nothing there, or is there?” 

‘ Did she touch the notebook?’ 

Light questioned it while looking at [Y/N] as she was looking at something other than Light, she was looking straight at Ryuk. Light turned to look at Ryuk, turning back to [Y/N]. Ryuk moved to the side and while the dog’s eyes followed, [Y/N] did the same. 

“ It’s a joke.” 

Light changed his expression to one of amusement as he laughed a bit. Deep in his mind he was worried, was she playing with him? 

“ You know, I had a friend back then before I moved that told me that animals can sense or see the things we can’t. She mentioned that animals can also see ghosts and impure things. It is rumored that when a dog barks, but there is nothing out there is because they are trying to drive out the evil spirit or alert others. Who knows, it was fixated on something next to you, maybe you’re being haunted or something.” 

“ Haha, well, I don’t think we are but who knows, maybe you are right.” 

Light glared at Ryuk as he was cackling. 

‘ That was a close one wasn’t it Light, to think that this whole operation would have been blown off by a little girl. If anything, you aren’t being haunted by a spirit, more like you accepted the spirit.’ 

“ Hey, Light, how do you deal with it?” 

“ Deal with that?” 

“ School and stuff, you seem to work hard to keep up your grades and I dunno, it seems stressful. You must either have a good coping method for it or you really like studying.” 

“ Well, I have other hobbies that help me relax, but I rarely get stressed. Why do you ask?” 

“ I dunno, don’t want to see you bottle everything up and then explode on us.” 

“ You’re really kind, you know that?” 

At the sound of this compliment, [Y/N] turned into a darker shade as she looked away. She was never good with compliments but nonetheless, while she was embarrassed, she accepted them. 

“ What do. . .you mean. . .” 

“ Although you have difficulty expressing it [Y/N], you seem to be emotionally connected with people. I guess it’s rare to see someone so kind, just like you said, it’s hard to find people who have something worth saying you know?” 

“ Most people are assholes, excuse my language, but they are like a test. If you can notice flaws in others, you can avoid having those with yourself. If you see someone insulting others, then you’ll try to perfect yourself to not be like them, you’ll try not to insult others but people like them are fair game. It’s just something strange I thought of but, while it would be nice to not have them in society, it’s hard to picture one without since we are so used to it. I guess we kinda need people like them in life for us to be better, I honestly have no clue I’m just a teenage girl after all.” 

“ You have an interesting take on your views, did Kira impact it?” 

“ Actually, yes. Both Kira and L, the whole battle really. One is fighting for a better society and it gets you thinking if Kira is a bad guy or not, then you have L who strives for order in society but is trying to rid of us the one thing that keeps us safe. I see both really, fear conditions you to not act out since you fear punishment, but laws do the same, if anything its similar, just that this lesson, laws start to morph into morals that society just follows. Both shape society, one is faster and the other takes years to perfect. Anyway’s sorry for geeking out on you, thanks again for walking me home Light. Give your family my greetings, hope to see you soon.” 

[Y/N] thanked Light one last time with a small bow before proceeding to enter her home. Light only looked at her before waving off and leaving with Ryuk following Light. 

‘ Isn’t she perceptive? Well, if anything at least she seems to be a supporter of Kira.’ 

“ No, she isn’t, not yet at least. She is stuck in the middle and I want to ensure that she chooses right.” 

‘ Since when do you care over who is in line with who?’ 

“ Well, after all, if I want to make this world a better place I need to know who is worthy and who isn’t. [Y/N] is no exception. She is kind and I think her mindset is compassionate and understanding, but I don’t think that she has enough to convert herself to a Kira worshiper her. Everyone labels either Kira as a savior or as a murderer and I think that we need to clear his name up a bit.” 

‘ Oh? Is she really this important?’ 

“ She seems to understand Kira’s ideology as much as I do, even though I am him. She is more than fitting in my new world.” 

‘ Sounds like you’re in love with a teenager who is a couple of years younger than you.’ 

“ If anything, you should stop talking to me in public, others can’t see you but when I talk to you others notice and it’s weird.” 

‘ Love. . . ‘ Light pondered on that thought, sure there were plenty of girls who had a crush on him and more, he didn’t think much of it but it was strange. Was he in love? All those other girls who confessed to him seemed to think otherwise, they never cared much for their studies much less cared enough for anything aside from appearance. Yet here [Y/N] was, a diamond in the rough, someone who would think, had views that he was interested in hearing. She could be someone interesting to converse with even if he wasn’t under the influence of the notebook. [Y/N] wasn’t like most people in society who went on with their day to day life and believed anything, [Y/N] thought outside the box and tried to understand everyone and everything, she would benefit this new world more, but more importantly, she would benefit Light more. 

~~ 

[Y/N] put her groceries away at a fast pace,  skipping past the post-it note that read, ‘ Back at 6 ‘. She ran to her room and grabbed her journal and logged into the internet and began to log into the site that was used for supporting Kira. 

‘ Kira, one of my bullies was being mean to me, robbed me of my money and went to target others, even threatening to hurt my little brother. Kira please, give justice and rid us of scum like him. His name is XXX and this is his picture.’ 

“ Needs a name and face and doesn’t have to be in direct contact.” 

‘ The police are trying to destroy our peaceful society, we must get rid of them for Kira, they need to understand that Kira is doing what they could never!’ 

“ Light’s dad is working the Kira case, how far is he into it? It’s probably nothing but. . . there could be something supernatural happening. There is no weapon out there that is used liked that, and that thing with Light and the dog? Should be nothing . .” 

[Y/N] wrote in her journal, thinking much about the conflict. If anything, she was more in favor of L, he was a world star detective and she loved crime-solving so of course, she studied up on what was known about him. L was right in most aspects, there are some jobs where being a bad apple doesn’t cut it and even in a job setting, you can’t give someone who is ‘bad’ power that they can abuse. Essentially, the power that Kira has is what is making him think he is some god and that is dangerous, Kira will stop at nothing to get what he wants if that is his ideology and that includes hurting others, even those he swore to protect. L wants to establish order and although he is a bit reckless, he craves for a society that understands right from wrong in a more law centered area, since morals are the individual’s thoughts and ideas. 

[Y/N] knew that while those who acted unfavorably deserved worse, death is too sweet for them, but also logically we need them to prove a point to others. [Y/N] sighed when she finished her notes, she suspected a lot but she needed to go over more to hear what she could about the case to reach a conclusion on who she thinks is Kira. 

It was like any other day, one that was peaceful as much as you would in a world with Kira and L battling it out, Sayu invited [Y/N] to their house for dinner and for help on their homework. Sadly her father wouldn’t be joining them due to work so [Y/N] decided to snoop around to see what she could find. They were in Light’s room getting help as he repeated what he told Sayu previously regarding the work. Light was busy looking at [Y/N] as she looked at her notebook, she finished her homework ages ago but for the sake of it, she pretended as if she was struggling too. Light was growing concerned more and more, if anything was he feeling love toward [Y/N]? He thought too much on it, if he did love her this would be awkward, he was almost a school graduate and she was barely entering high school, but above all, she was more of a guilty pleasure and she still hasn’t sided with Kira completely. It was infuriating to see someone he cared so much about not understand him all that well, but no matter, he knew what he had to do and his plan was already in motion. He just needed to show her how nice Kira was. 

‘ He is staring at me. . . what does he want? I shouldn’t think too much on it but. . . there is something strange about Light. His expressions, they seem so. . . so fake. I wonder what he is hiding.’ 

Dinner was soon called and [Y/N] stayed behind a little longer to clean up her things, Light trusting that no one would find the compartment to the notebook, but still couldn’t be too safe, could you? Light stayed close as [Y/N]  placed her pencils in her pouch, the moment he turned his back, [Y/N] started to look around the room. 

‘ For a model student he sure is basic, but whatever, I’m trying to find information on Kira and the case. . .what is this?’ 

At that moment, she noticed a pen, that seemed to be broken apart but not in any bad shape, as it was purposely broken apart. Was Light some kis genius who had a weird fixation with breaking things? Maybe. [Y/N] was looking around and around, but there was nothing strange. It wasn’t until she stepped on the controller and there was the channel that covered a lot regarding Kira and the criminals, almost as if they were handing them to Kira themselves. Nothing uncommon, it was a popular show after all, but the off-putting thing about the whole thing was how everything fit regarding his persona. Light’s expression when Kira was mentioned as if he wanted it to be acknowledged. No matter, there was nothing of use at all in this room so she went down to eat with the rest. 

After dinner, for reasons untold, it was earlier than usual so it was nothing too surprising when [Y/N] offered herself to walk home, leaving the Yagami household to settle earlier than usual. As she was walking there was a sound, a large sound alerted her to turn around as she was met with a face, this person had bloodshot eyes and wore all black, but above anything, they were carrying a bloodied knife. [Y/N] fumbled a bit as she tried to run away and the figure started to chase her down. 

‘ W-why now? W-who is he?’ 

[Y/N] panicked as she ended up getting tackled by the figure, she panicked as she struggled until he lifted the knife to her neck as she let out a small breath. Fearing that even the slightest breath could get her cut. The figure was breathing rapidly, hyperventilating even. 

‘ I-is he on drugs?’ 

Soon, the figure stopped breathing altogether and slummed forward, the knife that he had fallen next to him. His whole body was slumped forward and pressed up against [Y/N]. Her breath escalated, turning to the figure and letting out a large screech and throwing him over. 

“ [Y/N]? Hey, what happened?!” 

[Y/N] scrambled away from the body as she looked up to see the person who called her name. Her eyes widened in fear as she met those wth concern of Light. 

‘Light. . . Light, Light Yagami. .’ 

“ [Y/N] who is he? Are you alright?” 

Nodding, [Y/N] shakingly pointed to the man, Light’s eyes tracing back and touching the man, his felt no pulse. His eyes darted to the knife as she looked over at [Y/N] with concern all over his face. 

“ Did he do anything to you [Y/N]?” 

“ N-no, I think he passed out beforehand. S-should we call the cops?” 

“ Yeah, I’m already on it.” 

Light called the cops and explained the situation as [Y/N] glared at Light. Light was the first one to arrive at the scene and he was somewhat calm about. Light has been acting suspiciously this entire time, it’s safe to consider Light a possible suspect. What scared [Y/N] more, was that she could see his face lifting, more as if he was smiling. Case closed, Light had something to do with this, Light had to be Kira.

~~ 

[Y/N] was in her home taking a bath. The cops came to the scene and took care of everything, to her suspicion, his death was a heart attack. The police assumed that it was Kira once again as this man had no previous health history that put him in any risk for one. 

“ I’m sorry you had to experience something frightful, I am only thankful that my son was there to help you Miss [L/N].” 

“ Don’t worry about it. . thank you for your work sir.” 

“ Of course, Light, see to it that she gets home safely.” 

Light nodded and walked her home. It was nothing that far, but they had small talk along the way. 

“ Hey Light, do you really think it was Kira?” 

“ Possibly, the man had a heart attack as the rest and he was apparently a wanted criminal so if anything that is enough to consider it. If Kira did, how do you feel?”

“ Well, I guess I owe Kira my life, after all, he did save me. Then again, it’s my own experience so I guess that isn’t enough evidence, but I think that Kira is someone who won’t stray off his path and will continue to be justice!” 

Light let out a chuckle and turned to the side. He was smiling proudly, he won over [Y/N], he did it. She understood Kira’s ideology and believed in him. She would make a perfect companion in this world he seeks to create. Once they reached her house, [Y/N] thanked him and went inside her home with Light bidding her a good night. 

Recalling the end of the eventful night, [Y/N] got out to the bath and changed. She clicked on the T.V and a program started as she wrote in her journal. 

‘ Light was there almost immediately after, it wasn’t that far from where I was, his house was close by so they should have heard something.’ 

‘ Light kept asking me about Kira, and when I told him I was a Kira supporter he seemed happy.’ 

‘ Kira killed my assailant.’ 

“ This just in, we have reports of a criminal that was announced on T.V at 7 was killed today around 8:48 PM! Does this mean that Kira struck again?” 

“ Of course he did! Kira knows that his loyal followers would present him with scum that the world has! He killed [ Criminal Name ] to show us that he hears us, we must show him more devotion!” 

‘ [Criminal Name], that’s who attacked me. . . that’s the channel that was in Lightroom. . .the ability to kill someone with a name and face would be something supernatural, the dog looking next to Light and moving his eyes, Light and his fake smiles, the fact that Kira was changing patterns when it was revealed by the cops this, Light’s dad is a cop. . .Light is Kira. . .’ 

[Y/N] eyes widened as she tried hard to compose her argument that she would present to the task force, to L himself.

“ Light, you fucking bastard. I caught you.” 

The next day, [Y/N] dressed up and went to the police station. She talked to those in front, “ Please you have to let me see L or the chief, I have information that can help with the case.” 

“ Sorry, but they are busy. You can leave a message and we can deliver it.” 

“ No I can’t risk the information I have, when are they not busy?” 

“ It’s the Kira case, now run along.” 

“ [Y/N]? What are you doing here?” 

“ Light. . . oh nothing. Just trying to get more information on what happened yesterday.” 

“ Don’t worry, what happened yesterday won’t happen again. If you want to know I can ask my father, but don’t worry about it.” 

[Y/N] nodded before returning home and leaving Light alone to attend his business. It was a shock, Light was there and so was [Y/N], she didn’t realize how hard it would be to tell them that Light is Kira. She also let it slip her mind that Light was the Cheifs son, it would be devastating to hear that your son is a wanted criminal. She was chilling in her room until someone ran her doorbell. She went downstairs and was met with an old man as she smiled and asked for [Y/N]. 

“ Is this [Y/N]?” 

“ Yes?” 

“ I see, well please come with me. You have some information present regarding the Kira case? L is interested in what you have to say. With that, [Y/N] smiled before nodding and going inside the car. She was blindfolded during the car ride but that was to be expected. She was also blindfolded when she was taken to see L, but it was taken off when they were in the room. She was met with a man with messy black hair, white long-sleeved shirt, blue jeans, and dark eye bags. 

“ You must be miss [Y/N] [L/N] right?” 

“ Yes, you must be L, right? Sorry to bother you but I think I know who Kira is. It’s just a guess right now but I think it’s him, no, some part of me knows it’s him!” 

“ And who would that be?” 

“ Light Yagami.” 

“ I see, so you suspect him too.” 

“ You do as well?” 

“ Yes I do, in fact, I know it is him. I wonder what makes you think that?” 

“ Well, I believe that the way he kills isn’t from this world, it can’t be. It has to be something else, while I don’t know what it is, it leaves some trace. I and Light were walking and I know it sounds silly but there was this dog and he kept staring at something that wasn’t there, even Light saw it but I couldn’t! It was strange, he didn’t tell me he saw it, but his eyes were matching those of the dog. Besides, he was watching T.V once and for some reason it was on that channel that broadcasts those criminals and for some reason, [Criminal Names] ended up attacking me the same day! Light’s dad is a cop, so it would make sense for him to access information and such, besides, Light hides behind his appearance. When I was attacked and he called the cops, I swore I saw him smile!” 

“ Calm down, I think this is interesting. Your reasoning is good and you’re very observant, but you see I have a similar issue. It’s Light, Light is Kira, but I can’t find any evidence that proves it’s him, therefore I propose something. Do you want to work for me?” 

“ I-!?” 

“ Ryuzaki, are you sure?” 

“ Yes, I am Watari, besides, she is close to Light, if anything she can be the key to get more evidence against him.” 

“ I accept!” 

“ Why don’t you consider this more carefully Miss, Ryuzaki can manage just fine if you say no.” 

“ No, I accept! I’ve always had my views towards Kira, sure he gets rid of the criminals, but someone with that power, I fear who they might hurt to continue this path. Besides, Light has been lying this whole time, he needs to be put away.” 

L looked at the female with amusement in his eyes, he was intrigued with her. It seemed that she was determined, something he admired a lot. He nodded and told her of his plan, she would try what she could to gain information from Light and try to get evidence for the task force. [Y/N] was happy to meet L, if anything she was happy that for once she was seen as her age, she was given a responsibility and she would not fail. Since then, she had been reporting to Light, even when L made himself public to Light as well. [Y/N] had been operating in the shadows, she had been visiting Sayu recently, having talks with Light and doing homework with Sayu, luckily everything was fine. [Y/N] met Misa, who was a little too upset with the whole Light kinda paying more attention to her and Sayu, but he was just trying to be a good older brother. All the commotion happened, as [Y/N] did nothing but report. She didn’t buy the whole girlfriend act so she looked more into it. 

“ So you think Misa knows?” 

“ Yes, Light’s expressions mask annoyance and hatred so I highly doubt he likes her, she either knows and he is keeping her alive for that, or she is being used/went willingly with him. It’s a little toxic, to be honest.” 

“ Now we aren’t one to comment on Light’s relationship status [Y/N], but still, this is intriguing. We both came to the conclusion that there was a second Kira, my suspicion of her has risen. Thank you for this information [Y/N].” 

“ Of course anything to help out!” 

[Y/N] thanked L before heading out. She was thankful for this job and opportunity. Although she didn’t find much, she assisted a lot in the investigation, and it was even worse when L and Watari were killed. 

~~ 

Tears streamed down [Y/N] face as she was informed of his passing by someone else, finding out that Light was the one to take his place. If anything, she was repulsed. Disgusted, the same murderer that killed L and others, posing as the lead detective? There were so many wrongs with that, she had to do something. Miraculously, someone with the name N reached out to her regarding the situation, 5 years later. Light ended up moving in with Misa, but he was always around constantly messaging [Y/N] about his sister and about her. It was no surprise that she was informed of many things, she was introduced to the task force later while L was still alive, talking about how she was someone who went undercover. He would ask her constantly about her thoughts and she would have to answer how she would normally take into consideration that she is communicating with the devil himself. [Y/N] was now a 20-year-old female, working secretly with N, or near regarding everything. Taking into consideration the information that L had and what [Y/N] had to say. They did well to keep [Y/N] a secret from Light though, she was a secret that remained deep within the task force, Light would, no should never know that she was involved. She would speak about what she knew, the death note and possible fake rule, etc. 

[Y/N] got a message from Light, asking her out for a coffee to speak about somethings. She normally would brush it off, had it not been for Near saying she should go and see what he wants. She hesitantly agreed, choosing to go. The conversation was one that was a bit bland, for someone keeping contact with the other for so long. 

“ How have you been [Y/N]?” 

“ Good and you?” 

“ I’ve been preoccupied and with Misa, it’s hard to keep track.” 

“ That must be a bummer, but hey wouldn’t she be mad? I mean you’re hanging out with a girl now, not your little sister’s friend.” 

“ It’s not like we are something after all.” 

Light forced himself to say those things. It is true that they haven’t been in contact for so long, but she had been there every step of the way. She had supported him in so much, she wasn’t as smart as him, but she also wasn’t like Misa who was acting than thinking. [Y/N] opened her mind for anything and everything, she was someone who understood a dream and passion and helps both the pros and cons to it, both sides, understanding o anything, someone that was suitable, a role model even in his new world that he was constructing. Light was always interested in her, he just couldn’t say anything. Misa came into the picture and he had to obey and act as the perfect boyfriend. He thought he almost lost his grasp on you had it not been for the fact that you still stayed close to him, almost as if you wanted him too, right?

“ Yeah, we aren’t anything. You aren’t that kind of person for sure, but any leads in the Kira case? I mean, you told me that you were made chief on the investigation, along with L so I am interested in learning what it is you know about Kira, sure I understand that you have to capture him but, I’m sure he had a reason.” 

“ You mean a reason to kill L right?” 

The silence was in the cafe, [Y/N] panicked, no she didn’t slip up, god that wire that Near had planted in her better be picking this up because this wasn’t part of the plan. 

“ I thought L was alive, Light you better not be joking-?!” 

“ Now why would I joke about his death, besides N is there to confirm it, isn’t he.” 

“ When?”

“ Since you visited the task force. Believe it or not, I tend to keep great tabs on those that matter, I need, or I want.” 

“ I see, you knew the whole time. Including what L meant to me and you still had the fucking audacity, why haven’t you killed me yet? Surely I must have been a mole in the plan, some bug worth squashing right?” 

“ Because I want you [Y/N]. You matter a lot more than you think to me, in this new world that I am planning on creating, I want you to be the first person welcomed in there, ruling next to me.” 

“ What? I thought Misa, who was the second owner would do that.” 

“ I needed her eyes, you must have known from all your notes. 5 years ago you suspected me, and now you know. Yes, I did kill L, the Death note is in my possession, I am lying to the police, I am Kira, I am the God of this new world, and you shall be next to me to judge all these souls.” 

“ Why me?” 

“ Simply put, back then you were struggling to pick a side, I thought I won you over but then I realized, you are better than me at putting up appearances. I see why L trusted you a lot more than us, but one thing I learned is that the mind can be persuaded a lot. I understood a lot more than you realized, you are understanding, compassionate if anything you see both sides of the same coin and I admire that about you. You have a voice in the matter, unlike these brainless fools, you see my true vision, you see me for me. You see past Kira’s actions and more of his motives!” 

“ All I see is a fucking murderer, but go off I guess.” 

A small chuckle was released by Light as he turned to face you and whispered in [Y/N]’s ear, ‘ The wire you were wearing is of no use anymore, anything I said wasn’t even recorded. Isn’t that lovely, you’re mine and believe me, I will cleanse your mind from his poison.” 

“ What about Misa? What about everyone. They will find me.” 

“ They will find the notebook that I made, one that has your name in it and they will think that you died. No one will find someone they think is dead.” 

“ Kira, you’re nothing but a killer.” 

“ No, this was a sacrifice I had to make, and believe it, it was worth it for this, for you. This is the fruit of my labor, of our labor.” 

“ I had nothing to do in this ploy-!?” 

“ Oh, but you did! DON’T YOU SEE. YOU WERE ON MY MIND THE ENTIRE TIME I KILLED THEM. I DID THIS FOR YOU, FOR US, FOR THE FUTURE.” 

Light composed himself before returning back to his usual self. 

“ This was a sacrifice we had to make if I told Misa to kill herself, she would. That would be too obvious though, so I’ll keep her around and you hidden. Just like L kept you hidden, history is repeating itself but only for a moment, we are looking at a new era [Y/N] one that I know you’ll understand, one that you will come to understand again. If you think about it, I’m cleansing your mind once again. You’ll experience what it is to taste 

.

.

.

The Forbidden Fruit~

[blazingparker]

What’s Up, Danger? (Chapter 3)

Here it is! the final chapter of What’s Up, Danger? As I’ve said before, I was totally blown away by the response to this fic. Thank you to all of you who commented, left kudos, reblogged, and everything else!!

read it on ao3!

---

“JARVIS, what time is it?” Tony called out as he fiddled with repairing one of the gauntlets on one of his older suits. It had gotten damaged during the battle of Sokovia, and he’d just built a new one rather than ever repairing it. Now, with his refusal to go after Spider-Man and the lack of other missions, he’d had plenty of time to catch up on lab projects and even fix up his old suit.

“It is currently 2:37 in the morning on Friday, January 25th, sir. Might I suggest you retire and get some rest?” Tony frowned, setting down his tools. Peter still hadn’t called him, and he never stayed out patrolling this late when he had a class the next day.

Peter. The last few weeks with Peter had been some of the best of Tony’s life, hands down. While they still hadn’t defined their relationship, they were more than friends and there were definitely too many feelings involved for them to just be fuck buddies.

For once, Tony didn’t dread the early hours of the morning when JARVIS would hound him to head to bed. He’d talk on the phone with Peter, listen to how his day went and maybe tell him about his latest project before they would hang up with whispered words of affection and head to bed. On particularly good nights, he’d meet Peter in his apartment with takeout (Tony wasn’t going to fool himself into thinking he could cook, come on) and they’d cuddle up on the couch with a movie. Sometimes, he’d need to stitch Peter up or help him out of his suit to tend to his injuries, which he was always more than happy to do. Things were perfect. They were perfect.

In fact, the only reason why Tony hadn’t asked Peter to be his boyfriend yet was because he knew the young man had enough on his plate without adding the media frenzy that came with dating a billionaire. Not to mention the Avengers would find out, and that would make it even harder for Peter to keep his identity a secret.

Tony wasn’t really known for being a patient man, but for Peter? For Peter, he’d wait.

Well, not tonight. Tonight, he was done waiting. It was close to three in the morning and Peter still hadn’t called, which was highly unusual.

“JARVIS, pull up the local news.” Tony turned and leaned back against the lab table and brought his mug of coffee to his lips. Maybe Peter had gotten held up with a bigger issue, like another burning building or a larger threat that required more time to take care of. If that was the case, the local news would definitely be covering it.

What they were actually covering made him drop his coffee mug, the ceramic dish shattering when it made impact with the floor.

A blonde newscaster was speaking, but Tony tuned her out in favor of reading the tagline and watching the footage.

Spider-Man Abducted by the Avengers. There was a shaky video, likely recorded by an unassuming passerby, of Peter standing on a roof with his chest heaving. Then, out of nowhere and seemingly for no reason, he tensed. A second later, a dart could be seen sticking out of his neck. Tony’s chest filled with dread as he watched Peter pluck it out and stare at it, swaying in place. When Peter collapsed, Tony actually made a move as if he could catch the young man, and felt fury bubble up when he saw what happened next.

Steve fucking Rogers caught Peter, quickly restraining him with a pair of vibranium cuffs before slinging him over his shoulder and carrying him off.

“--people of Queens are furious. There are talks of a march on Avengers tower. They have protected us from larger threats, yes. But Spider-Man was the one looking out for the people of Queens and New York at large every day. Where were the Avengers when Lacy Collins was almost assaulted last week, when Spider-Man rescued her? Where were the Avengers--”

Tony wasn’t listening anymore. The newscaster was right, of course, Peter was better than all of them. Peter deserved nothing but the Avengers’ respect and instead he’d gotten a dart to the neck and vibranium cuffs. He stormed out of the lab, grabbing his cell phone.

“JARVIS, dial Patriotic Fucker,” he all but growled as he got into the elevator. “And take me to the suit lab on level forty. The one with the landing platform.” There was no way they’d bring Peter back to the tower, which meant Tony needed a suit. Now.

“Tony, we caught him!” Steve cried out after picking up on the first ring.

“How fucking dare you,” Tony said lowly. “The mission was to learn his identity, Rogers. Not drug him and arrest him!” By the end, he was yelling into the phone. “Where the fuck did you take him?”

“Tony-I thought this was the best course of action. He was avoiding us even more.”

“Because Clint took a fucking shot at him! If an Avenger tried to take you out, would you really be peachy-keen and excited to chat?!” Tony screamed. “You star-spangled shit, you’ve compromised everything! As if he’s ever going to work with us now, after this little stunt! Not to mention they’re talking about protests against us on the news!” Taking a deep breath, he exited the elevator and made a beeline for the nanotech suit he’d just finished up. Grabbing the little housing unit, he placed it against his chest and double-tapped it, allowing the suit to encase his body.

“Clint and I are with him at the compound. We’re upstate.” Steve’s reply came after a beat of silence, and he actually sounded remorseful. Fucking finally, Tony had a location. He blasted out of the lab and away from the tower, JARVIS automatically plugging in directions for the fastest route to the compound.

“Did Natasha know about this? What about Banner, or Thor?” Tony barked out, determined to get as much information as possible before he got there. He wanted to be able to put his full focus on Peter, not these idiots.

“No. Clint and I made the call. They’re not to blame for this, Tony.”

“Oh, and that makes things better? You kidnapped my-” Tony hesitated. Peter wasn’t technically his anything. “My Spider-Man,” he finished lamely.

“Yeah, we’re gonna have a chat about that, Tony. About the Stark Tech he’s wearing, and how your number is saved in his phone under the name ‘Snarky Bitch’. You’ve known. You knew this kid and didn’t tell the team.” Tony found his blood running cold for the second time that night.

You knew this kid.

“Steve Rogers, did you take off his mask?” He yelled, and the silence on the other end was enough of an answer. Feeling fury take over, Tony let go of any semblance of restraint he still had. That was the final straw. Peter had taken his secret identity incredibly seriously, and he deserved to reveal it to whomever he chose. Not have that choice taken from him.

“Yes, I know him. I know his name, and I’ve been helping him out,” Tony seethed. “Unlike you, you frozen fuck, I got him to trust me. He trusted me, and I helped him in return. He deserved that much. He’s sweet and kind and everything the world seems to think you are. But they were wrong. The great Captain America that the world knows would never drug and kidnap a college kid just because they didn’t do what he wanted.”

“Tony.” The voice on the other end cracked, and Tony smirked. Steve knew he was right.

“I expect you to be gone by the time I get there, which will be in about twenty minutes. You’d better stay away from him until I say otherwise, or I swear on my mother’s grave that your face will be meeting my gauntlet. Capische?”

“Understood. And-for what it’s worth, Tony, I’m sorry. I really thought this was the right call.” Tony huffed out a sigh.

“For future reference, if the plan involves drugs and kidnapping, it’s not the right call.” With that, he hung up on Steve and focused on getting to the compound as fast as he could. After a painstakingly long flight he arrived, storming through the doors and down to the detention level where he knew Peter would be. Tony exited the suit and put it on sentry mode, striding purposefully down the hall of cells, looking, searching--

Tony came to a dead stop in front of the last cell on the right and felt his heart fall right out of his body. It was Peter: restrained to a chair, in his suit but without his mask. His head lolled to the side and if Tony couldn’t see the rise and fall of his chest, he might have thought the young man was dead. Each of his legs was tied down to the chair and his hands were behind his back, likely in the vibranium cuffs still.

“JARVIS, unlock,” Tony whispered weakly, and rushed in as soon as the glass door slid open. Gently brushing Peter’s curls out of his face, he dropped to his knees in front of the man. “I’m so sorry, Peter. So, so sorry,” he whispered before making his way around to the cuffs so he could get Peter’s hands free.

---

Peter woke slowly, blinking against harsh light and instinctively letting out a groan of pain when his headache made itself known. Instinctively, he tried to rub his temple and couldn’t keep from whining softly when his hands were held down.

“Sit still, Pete. Please. I’m trying, okay? I promise, I’m trying.” Tony’s voice? That didn’t make any sense, Peter had been on patrol.

Patrol.

It all came flooding back to him - the dart, his dizziness, and the vague feeling of being restrained and carried off. After that, nothing. Now, he was awake and clearly restrained and Tony was there.

Tony had sold him out? Peter didn’t want to believe it, but it was the only thing that made sense. Tony was doing something with his cuffs and he was tied down tightly, unable to move. Tony knew his routines and when he liked to head home, and could have told the Avengers when it would be best to strike. When he’d be the most exhausted.

You idiot, he thought to himself. Peter dropped his head to his chest and tried desperately to fight back tears, not wanting Tony to know he was awake. As Spider-Man, he’d been shot, stabbed, punched and kicked. But this? This hurt the worst of anything he’d ever experienced.

All of a sudden, there was a loud bang and the pressure on his hands was gone. Peter pitched forward with a squeak of surprise, not expecting to be freed. Strong hands caught him and gently eased him back into the chair.

“Peter? You back with me?” Tony was in front of him now, face etched with concern as he brushed Peter’s hair out of his eyes and moved his hands down to his wrists. The older man gently massaged them, trying to ease any soreness as Peter slowly looked up at him.

“Why’d you do it?” He asked, shocked at how raspy his voice sounded. Tony just stared at him, confused.

“Because Steve and Clint are idiots, and this never should have happened. Bambi, I’m so sorry I didn’t check in sooner, I thought you were patrolling.” Tony started to ramble, and Peter’s brow furrowed in confusion.

“You didn’t...do this?” He asked, and winced at the horror that instantly took over Tony’s face.

“I’d never. I’d never, ever do something like this to you. You’re my Danger, my sweet-hearted vigilante who puts everyone ahead of himself and who I adore. I’m so sorry. If I’d known-” Tony was cut off by the swift press of Peter’s lips against his. Peter didn’t know why he’d doubted Tony for a second. Of course he would never sell him out - why would he help him and why would they be...whatever they were...if Tony’s whole endgame was to unmask him? He would have bailed after Peter pulled the mask off that one night all those weeks ago if that had been the case.

“I’m sorry,” Peter said, hiccuping as he tried to keep the tears at bay. “I just-I woke up and felt you doing something with my hands and I thought-I thought-”

“You thought I was putting you in the cuffs instead of taking you out of them,” Tony murmured in understanding. Peter just nodded as the other man focused on releasing his legs.

“I’m sorry-” he tried to repeat but was stopped by a finger against his lips. As soon as the finger was removed, it was replaced with a set of soft lips.

“No apologies, Bambi,” Tony whispered, and Peter just nodded again. He still felt exhausted and sluggish, likely because of the drugs making their way through his system. Luckily, Tony seemed to read his mind. “How about we head up to my private rooms, get something to eat, and watch a movie? Hm? Just like we always do.”

“That sounds nice,” Peter murmured back, pecking Tony’s lips one more time. He then grasped the man’s hand, slowly standing up and yelping in shock when his knees immediately gave out and he went crashing towards the floor.

That never happened, though. He was caught in a pair of strong arms and lifted up in a princess carry as Tony prevented the cold concrete from greeting his face. Peter’s arms instinctively wrapped around Tony’s neck.

“I’m sure I can walk if I could just try again,” Peter tried to protest, and Tony leaned their foreheads together.

“Let me do it. You’ve probably still got some stuff in your system, and I’ve been worried sick ever since I saw the news. Just let me take care of you. Let me take care of my-” Tony cut himself off, hesitating.

“Boyfriend,” Peter blurted out before staring at Tony with wide eyes. You don’t know that he wants that, Parker. His friends literally just drugged and kidnapped you, he’s probably just feeling protective--

“Boyfriend,” Tony repeated. A huge, real smile was plastered on his face as he held Peter even closer. “Let me take care of my boyfriend.” Blushing, Peter responded by simply pressing his face into Tony’s neck as though it would allow him to hide. After a split second, he pressed a soft kiss to the skin there. Tony nuzzled his face into Peter’s hair for a moment before turning and walking out of the cell.

“You know, I never got to hear about your night. Before all this, I mean,” Tony remarked as he carried Peter towards the elevator.

“I guess not,” Peter mused, pulling back just enough to look up at his boyfriend. Boyfriend, he could say that now.

“So...what’s up, Danger?”

“Oh my god.”

[buckleysjareau]

this has been living rent free in my head pls go crazy with it

eddie trying to patch up buck’s wounds after he’s slightly injured on a call and buck saying he can do it himself, maybe eddie saying “well i’m willing to take care of you, i want to” at some point

unconditional, unadulterated / 1.8k  you did tell me to go crazy... 

It happens just as there’s a flashover. Buck just barely makes it out the front entrance of what used to be a two story home when the flashover happens and thanks to the adrenaline, there’s only a dull pain in his calf from landing on it rough during his escape. Even as Hen asks if he’s hurt anywhere, the ache— he wouldn’t even call it a pain— wasn’t even enough to mention. 

As the adrenaline wears off, though, he realizes that it’s a little more than just an ache. It starts to hurt a touch more even as it’s resting on top of his turnout coat placed on the floor of the truck. It sucks but it’s manageable, nothing he hasn’t dealt with before. He only has to finish out the last hour of his shift then he can go home and ice it. 

His optimism is dulled when the instant he puts pressure on it to walk he has to bite his tongue to keep from screaming at the pain that shoots up from his ankle to his knee. He swallows any more noises of discomfort as he tries not to noticeably limp to his gear rack, already knowing he’s not in the mood for Bobby to scold him for hiding an injury. 

Which he’s not. He doesn’t think there’s any reason to say anything because he wasn’t injured. He was told that he’d might have pain flare ups for the rest of his life, this wasn’t new to him. 

Except for the fact that it wasn’t a random flare up. He’d irritated an old injury by landing on it hard and there was a possibility, a small one, but still a possibility that it was injured. Finding even the thought of going to the hospital right now less than desirable is what’s keeping him from speaking up about the possibility. 

“You alright, man?” Eddie’s voice pulls him out his head and it’s only then he realizes just how rough his breathing is as he tries to toe off the other boot. 

He forces a smile that he hopes doesn’t resemble the grimace he thinks it does. “Yeah, never better. Tired though, that one took a lot out of me.” 

Luck must be on his side tonight because Eddie doesn’t push him. There’s a little bit of disbelief in his eyes but he doesn’t push it. 

Thankfully there’s no calls in the last hour of his shift and he didn’t have to move his leg until it was time to clock out. The desire to be home, in his bed, with his leg iced and elevated was almost immeasurable. He’d spent the last hour of his shift internalizing the worry that something could be hurt and if this shift alone wasn’t enough to fully drain him, the overthinking definitely helped. 

He looked around him to see if anyone was around to catch him letting his guard down enough to limp and breathed out a sigh of relief when the only two people down there were people coming in from B shift. As he gets dressed into his civvies, he takes advantage of the empty locker room to openly wince and hiss whenever he’d put pressure on his leg. 

He grits his teeth mid groan when Eddie walks in. 

Please don’t say anything please don’t say anything please don’t say anything

“Hey, do you wanna follow me back to my place? Christopher has been dying to show you his new video game.” Eddie pauses before he smirks. “Well, I think what he said was more along the lines of he’s dying to crush you at his new video game.”

He wants to say yes, more than anything, but he just didn’t have the energy to pretend his leg wasn’t on fire the rest of the night. 

Buck sighs. “Any other night I would, you know that, but I really think I just need my bed tonight.”

Something flashes in Eddie’s eyes but disappears quick enough for Buck to decipher it. “If there was something wrong, you’d tell me, right?” 

Buck tries to reason with the guilt that comes when he promises Eddie that he absolutely would tell him if there was something wrong because it wasn’t a lie. Nothing was wrong, he was just in a little bit of pain. Like he kept telling himself, it wasn’t anything he hasn’t dealt with before. 

The effort it took not to limp or cry out in pain as Eddie walked out with him was enough to drain him for the rest of the week. 

And even as he wants to just cut off his own leg at that point, he can’t stop his heart from fluttering or his cheeks from reddening when Eddie waves at him as he drives away. 

He focuses on the way Eddie makes him feel soft as he drives home instead of how bad it’s going to feel to walk up the stairs to his bed. It’s enough to get him home but by the time he’s unlocking his door, he’s out of breath from the walk from the elevator to his door. 

He’s four steps up when the pain just becomes too much and he yells out as he collapses on his stairs. 

As he squeezes his leg in hopes the pressure will help ease the pain he wishes he’d told someone he was hurt. He regrets not telling Bobby when he’d noticed it was more than an ache.

What if it’s another clot? It could very well be a blood clot, he’s been off of the blood thinners for a few months. Oh my God, Maddie is going to be so pissed. 

He vows to never hide an injury again if he lives through this. 

Then he realizes that the pain lessens just a little and he thinks maybe he can calm down because the pain that came with blood clots didn’t tend to simmer. Maybe he’s not dying and maybe the worst of the pain was over. 

He’s too focused on massaging the pain away to hear the door open or the footsteps that made their way to him. 

“I knew something wasn’t right.” 

Buck startles, head snapping up at the sound of his best friend’s voice. When did he get here?

“Eddie? Why are you here?”

The brunette shakes his head, paces twice, then kneels in front of Buck. “I knew you were acting weird after that call. I saw the way you landed on your leg.”

“I’m,” a painful jolt that shoots up his leg cuts him off. “I’m fine, Eds.” 

Eddie scoffs. “Yeah, you look real fine.” 

“Not fake fine?” He can’t help himself from replying, grinning at the exasperated look on Eddie’s face.

He rolls his eyes before he stands and grabs onto Buck’s elbow. “C’mon, up you go!” 

“No, no, Eddie… I can’t walk on it. Not like this.” 

“You don’t have to. You’re gonna lean on me, okay? I won’t let it touch the floor.” He holds out his pinkie and Buck can’t stop the blush rushing to his cheeks at the treatment. He braces himself as he uses his upper body strength and Eddie as leverage to stand. Eddie threw his arm over his shoulder and gripped his side to keep him upright. 

“Good?” 

“Good.”

The journey to get from the stairs to his couch is a bit rocky at first but Eddie keeps his promise to not let it touch the floor. 

“Now, do you have any pain medication you still take in case of flare ups?” 

“Uh, no, not anymore. I just use Tiger Balm usually but we’re shit out of luck there. I ran out the last time this happened.” 

Eddie’s expression softens, a grin adorning his face as he pulls something out of his jacket pocket. “Maybe not.” 

He holds up a thing of Tiger Balm and if Buck wasn’t already in love with Eddie Diaz, that sight alone would have done it. 

Eddie picks up on Buck’s expression before he can even ask the question. “Like I said, I knew something was off after the way you landed on that call so I stopped at the drugstore before I came here.”

Don’t tear up don’t tear up don’t tear up 

Instead of handing it to Buck like he expected him to, Eddie is careful as he sits on the couch next to him and motions for him to move his leg towards him. 

Buck scoots back and carefully moves his bad leg to rest on the couch instead of his coffee table. Eddie takes special care not to hurt him more than he was already hurting, whispering apologies whenever Buck winces. By the time he’s done maneuvering his leg it’s bent at the knee and the area where he feels the most pain is closest to Eddie. 

“Does this feel any worse?” 

Buck just shakes his head. 

Between the soft look on Eddie’s face, his tender touches, and being so attentively cared for, Buck is left speechless. 

“Eddie… you don’t have to do this. I can do this myself.” Buck has to stop himself from moaning when he massages a certain spot. “You should be home with Christopher.”

“I don’t have to, but I want to, okay?” 

The way he says it is so tender and Buck’s heart flutters in his chest. 

“Eds, that’s sweet, but you really don’t have to do this.”

Buck tenses when Eddie’s hand finds his and rubs a thumb over his knuckles that completely relaxes him. 

“Buck, I’m willing to take care of you. This isn’t a hardship for me, okay? I want to do this, I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t. You always take care of me and it’s about time I return the favor so… let me help you?” 

No amount of yelling at himself not to tear up stops the tears from blurring his vision. He’s so used to taking care of himself, he’s so used to dealing with the all encompassing pain alone and he never let himself feel the want of someone to care for him so he didn’t have to. Not until now, not until Eddie. 

Eddie abruptly stops rubbing his leg and Buck whines at the loss of contact. “Hey, what’s wrong? Did I hurt you?” 

Buck shakes his head. “No one’s ever cared for me like this before. No one but you.”

He doesn’t flinch when a hand cups his cheek using their thumb to wipe away Buck’s tears. 

“No one.” 

“Well you better get used to it, Buck, because I care about you. So much. You don’t have to suffer alone anymore, okay? Just say the word.” 

“I love you.” He blurts out. 

Even with his eyes screwed shut from embarrassment Buck can hear the sincerity in Eddie’s voice as he repeats the sentiment. 

His leg is long forgotten, the pain back to a dull ache. 

The only things Buck feels are Eddie’s lips on his and unconditional, unadulterated love.   

[thran-duils]

Use All of Me (P.12)

Title: Use All Of Me (Part Twelve) Summary: Fem!Reader x Dark Mob!Steve Rogers. The Avengers are heroes saving the world but in this AU, they are also permitted by the powers in charge to have less than favorable business underneath their guise of mere superheroes. Steve and Tony are at the helm, keeping their empire’s wealth in check, both devious and perilous if crossed. Steve takes a liking to the reader at a party and it may be her undoing to her autonomy choosing to go home with him. Words: 3,008 Warnings: Dark AF, angst, emotional/mental abuse, smut, breeding, death Author’s Note: ♫ Steve is getting desperate ♫

Part Eleven || Part Thirteen || Masterpost (mobile) || Fanfic masterpost

Tony was pacing in front of the cameras he had up on the large wall when Steve entered the room. Bucky, Sam, Clint, and Rhodey were already down there with Tony, sitting or standing. The general feeling in the room was tension and it was permeating the air.

“Get anything from him?” Tony asked as soon as he caught sight of Steve.

“He didn’t know shit,” Steve said gruffly. “Not that I gave him much time to say anything past admitting he had known she wanted to escape. If he was going to help her, he would have driven her off the property himself and disappeared with her. He would not have stuck around afterward if he had assisted her in any way. He was not that daft.”

“I would beg to differ on that,” Natasha commented, coming to stop in front of the cameras, her eyes searching the screens. “Are you only focusing on New York?”

“Larger cities in the north east for now mainly,” Tony answered, coming to stand beside her. He pointed at the lower right corner of the screens. “I have it set up to follow the main tracks of the Amtrak across the country the longer time passes.”

Bucky came up to Steve and asked, “Her family?”

Steve shrugged, “Her parents aren’t alive. Didn’t mention anyone else really. She was an only child.”

“What about her friends? They could have family in other states.”

“I could look into that,” Clint said. “Facebook isn’t that hard to look through and people are always oversharing on that stupid app.”

“Speaking of her friends… if she says anything she’s heard from you, Steve, about the business, that’s not going to be good,” Rhodey said, looking grim.

Uncomfortably, eyes swept to Steve quickly and he shook his head. “I don’t think she’s concerned about that,” Steve said tightly. “She just… wanted space. And instead of asking, she does some impulsive, unsafe bullshit.” He was working himself up again, his hands resting on his hips tensely. “Absolute horseshit.”

Tony turned from the screens, taking a few steps towards him. Trying to reason with Steve and calm him down, he told him, “Look, Pepper did too when we first got together. It takes a while for them to adjust from the hustle and bustle they were used to, but they do eventually. Unfortunately, Y/N had persistent friends. Stupid, persistent friends at that. But we are going to find her. You’re gonna get your kids back and her.” Tony held up his hand as an idea came, “And on that note, you need to register with the putative father registry.” Steve’s brow stitched in confusion. Tony laughed and said, “Trust me. I did it when I was younger because I was a little loose and needed to know if any of the women I was with – and I was for sure the father – were going to do anything with the kid that would blow back on me. There’s a notice to claim paternity form for a child born out of wedlock. With that, you’ll be notified of any court proceedings, such as adoption or guardianship changes.”

Steve’s jaw clenched at this and Tony said, “I don’t think that’s out of left field that might happen.”

“I’d love to see her try,” Steve said darkly, a deep scowl on his face.

Tony had to smirk at that ferociousness. “Hmm, me too. And good thing about this is that she won’t be notified that you registered. You know, not that she would get a notification anyway because she is AWOL, and it would go to her old address. It also doesn’t need to get notarized.”

He clapped his hands and turned to look at everyone else. “So, we’ll keep these on here. Like I said, the Amtrak cameras are going to go down the three main tracks. If it happens she’s gone for longer, we will start scanning outwards of the northeast on the other cameras. Barton, you got the familial ties. Man, big notes if the family is in a bordering state. Oh, I did get access to Natalie and Yua’s phones, but they are unfortunately turned off. Smart cookies. But if they turn them on again, it’ll light up on this laptop—”

“I’ll watch it,” Natasha volunteered.

Tony nodded in acknowledgment. “Unfortunately, we can’t put out a look out on the license plate because well… it’s Natalie’s car and it’s not stolen if she’s driving it.” He sighed and shrugged, “The rest of us… just on standby I suppose until we get something.”

“Do you want me to handle the meeting tonight with the union?” Rhodey asked.

“I forgot about that. Thank you for remembering,” Tony said appreciatively. “So, yes. And don’t let them try to bully you into giving them a bigger cut. Our deal is set, they just need to give us the money from the trade.”

“Do you have the surveillance video? Of Y/N leaving?” Steve asked him suddenly.

“You sure you wanna watch that?” Tony asked, skepticism lacing his tone. “I don’t need you punching a hole through these screens or anything.”

“No, I want to see it,” Steve said. “I want to see what she left with. Make sure she just didn’t hop in a car without anything.”

“Alright,” Tony said, still sounding uncertain. He walked towards another laptop and opened it, working to pull up the video.

Steve was there behind him, looming. He sat in the chair in front of the laptop, watching Tony rewind to the part he wanted to see. It stopped as the women started coming out of the house. Steve leaned forward, his eyes zeroed in on where Y/N was standing saying goodbye to everyone. He watched until it was just Yua with her and then Natalie came out of the house, a duffel bag over her shoulder and a hoodie and hat in hand. She threw it into her car and they moved quickly to put the coat on Y/N and get her into the backseat of the car. She was adjusting the hat and pulling the hood up as Natalie pulled away.

Tony was right. All Steve wanted to do was grab the laptop and smash it repeatedly on the table to try to quell some of the white-hot rage exploding inside, thinking if Bryce’s dumbass had just been outside, they would have never been able to even get her into the car in the first place. And how Natalie had managed to not be stopped in the house by him made him even angrier if possible. The giant oaf had been watching a movie Wanda told him.

He held it together though, keeping his hand steady as he reached up and closed the laptop with a slight snap but not too hard.

“Well, at least she’s got some clothes I guess,” he said to no one in particular. He pushed the chair back with a loud squeak. “I need to go on a run.”

<><><>

“And what? Go back to the city and wait for Steve to find me and beat the crap out of me until I give him information?” Yua asked seriously.

Your mouth fell open slightly at her bluntness. You had asked Yua what she was planning on doing past this as the three of you sat on the back porch of the cabin in the moonlight. When you had suggested going home, she had rose her brows in surprise before saying what she had.

She noticed the look on your face and apologized, “Sorry. That’s just… what’s going through my mind. Filter is a little gone by now.” She held up her fourth beer can sheepishly.

“I don’t think it’s far from the truth,” you said quietly. “So, you’re smart for worrying about it.” You shifted in your seat and admitted, “Steve doesn’t exactly sleep much either. So he’s got more time in the world than most.”

“Insomnia?” Natalie asked.

“No. He doesn’t need to. He would fake it a lot of the time… you know, just to lay in bed with me during the night.”

“That’s kind of romantic,” Yua said and Natalie shot her a piqued look. “What? It is!”

“Or creepy because he wanted to be next to her all the time,” Natalie retorted.

“I think it was a little bit of both. It’s not like he wouldn’t hear me get out of bed even if he was in his study or somewhere else in the house, so it’s not like being right next to me would have made much of a difference in the long run,” you muttered, picking at the blanket. “But, he enjoyed it I think. Lying in bed with me. Snuggling me while I slept. He’d watch TV quietly too.” You chewed on your bottom lip, thinking of how you had enjoyed those moments too, waking up with him there, warm in his embrace. Admitting that out loud though was too hard; like it was fake that you had asked for help.

“Good thing light doesn’t bother you when you sleep. Honestly, I’m jealous of your ability to just fall asleep wherever,” Natalie said, trying to lighten the mood.

“Soaking it up while I can,” you said, giving a halfhearted smile.

“Where are we going to go though? Seriously? We can’t exactly go back to our apartments for our things. I’m afraid someone would be watching,” Yua said and you admired her ability to think ahead like that.

“We could order a moving service. Have them store our things in a storage unit outside NYC. Then after a substantial amount of time, have it shipped to wherever we move to,” Natalie suggested before she sighed heavily. “How am I going to get a good recommendation for a job by just quitting?”

“You could call and tell Brett the truth. Well, not who we are running from, don’t want to get anyone else involved, plus you know… they are already going to be mad about Y/N leaving with secrets. So no need to incriminate them when they’re already expecting it. On the off chance they do find us, not having gotten them in trouble with the law will probably bode well for us. But anyway, you know… tell Brett that you’re helping a friend escape an abusive partner.” Yua suggested. The two of you were staring at her in astonishment and she shrugged. “What? That’s what I was going to do with my boss. I can work from home completely. I already do it half time. He just needs to mail me a laptop and we already have WiFi here. Thank god, I would die without Netflix.”

“You astound me sometimes,” you told her, a wide smile on your lips. And it was quickly replaced by tears of gratitude and she reached for your hand, grasping it tightly. “No, it’s fine. I’m just… overwhelmed. I didn’t want you guys to have to uproot your lives for me.”

“We’ve been friends for a decade. Plus, it’s not like I have anything going for me back there anyway except a high paycheck and a string of hard dicks following behind me like dogs and I can get that somewhere else,” Yua responded, taking a swig of her beer as you and Natalie laughed. She gave your hand one more squeeze before pulling away.

“Plus, New York was getting a little tired anyway,” Natalie chimed in. “I’ve wanted to move. Not ideally like this but… I think we can make the best of it.”

Nodding, you said, “We can try.”

You suddenly stilled, your fingers digging slightly into your abdomen.

Yua sat up quickly, “What? What’s wrong?”

“I… I think one of them just kicked,” you said, a slow smile spreading across your face. The two of them immediately relaxed. You shot Yua a look and asked, “Is that too early?”

‘No, that sounds right on time,” Yua said. “Especially for your first one.”

Looking down at your abdomen, you smiled again softly this time. You tried to will them to move again, imagining them sleeping there. You wondered what they were dreaming about.

<><><>

Steve thanked Tony for bringing him the sandwich he had placed in front of him, taking a large bite. He was and had been planted in front of the surveillance screens for a long while, only getting the minimal amount of sleep he required and only when someone else was there to watch while he was out. Rhodey had just been watching with him and got up to stretch his legs, also thanking Tony for bringing the sandwiches.

A ring cut into the silence and Steve swallowed before picking up his phone. He saw the number on the phone, recognizing it as Dr. Kamal’s office.

“Hello?”

“Mr. Rogers?” A voice said on the other end of the phone.

“Yes?”

“I am calling from Dr. Kamal’s office. It looks like Y/N has an appointment right now and we were wondering if you were on your way…?”

“Shit,” Steve swore under his breath and said, “No, no we are not on the way. I’m sorry. It completely slipped my mind to call and cancel.”

“Would you like to reschedule? There’s an opening later in the day, there was another cancellation. Or we can look—”

“Look, I’m going to be honest,” Steve cut in. “I don’t know where she is.”

“O-oh,” the assistant said on the phone, stammering a bit at that information. “Like today or…?”

“I haven’t seen her for days,” Steve clipped. “She ran off with her friends. I’m not sure to where. I have not had contact with her. So, I can’t make an appointment because I don’t know when I’ll find her or if she’s coming back.”

The assistant said slowly, “Um, well, I suppose then give us a call when you do know.”

“Will do,” Steve muttered before hanging up the phone.

Steve let out a frustrated sigh, slamming his phone down on the counter. His mind was racing thinking about Y/N missing a check up and something being wrong with the babies, with her, or both. He hated not having control of the situation and not being confident she was being kept safe by him.

He looked to Rhodey and Tony. “It’s time to report her missing.”

“Steve, she’s not missing. The cops won’t—” Rhodey started to say.

“I don’t need the cops. If we get her face out there, someone might call.”

“And if that someone is a cartel or something? Saw her face, kidnaps her or all three of them and then demands ransom?”

Steve shouted, “Then I’ll fucking pay it, Rhodey!”

Rhodey closed his mouth and shot a look at Tony, who merely shrugged in return. Rhodey sighed, knowing that Tony would be acting the same way if it was Pepper who had run off on him and would not be garnering any support to dissuade Steve from it from him.

<><><>

Yua came into the cabin quickly, tossing her bags down, startling you and Natalie watching a movie. She stood in front of the TV, blocking the view. “We got a problem.”

“What?” the two of you demanded in unison.

“Your face is all over the place on one of the news channels. I saw it at the mini mart behind the counter.”

Natalie scoffed, “How? Are they saying she’s missing?” Yua nodded and Natalie let out a frustrated noise. “Aren’t those supposed to drop if no foul play is expected? Like… they can easily draw conclusions that you ran off on your own accord. It’s clear in the tapes I’m sure!”

“Money,” Yua said darkly. “They’ll be able to keep up advertisements about it forever probably with all the money they have. Probably banking on everyone wanting to do a favor for Captain America. Who wouldn’t want to be in his debt for a favor? Plus, they’re also playing the ‘she’s not mentally competent’ card.”

“What?” you asked shocked, feeling like you had gotten socked in the stomach.

“You can’t be serious. Just because she’s pregnant?” Natalie demanded.

Yua said nothing which was answer enough.

“How will I go to a hospital?” you asked in a voice barely above a whisper.

Natalie assured you quickly, “You can use an alias when they admit you. And when we bring you in, we will have a hood on and a hat, just like when you left. Hopefully there won’t be a lot of people in the ER. Upon discharge, your real name would be attached to the records but under HIPAA you’ll be protected.”

Yet, HIPAA could not protect you from someone who desperately needed money really.

“But… won’t someone turn me in to Steve?” You could not keep the worry out of your voice.

“We don’t know that for sure,” Yua said gently. “And I don’t think it’s something you should worry about.”

Squeezing your hands together, you focused on your breathing, trying to remain calm and push the thought from your mind. Your birth was still far enough off that hopefully it would die down a little.

“Have you thought more about adoption?” Natalie asked you gently.

You nodded, “Yeah. Can I though if I am not a resident of the state?”

“You can surrender a child – or children, in your case – up to the hospital within 72 hours in most states. I checked,” Yua said.

“Good,” you said, nodding. It hit you suddenly and you asked panicked, “You turned your phone on?”

Yua shook her head and said, “I asked the guy at the station to check it out for me. Slid him an extra five dollars while I went to call my mum on the pay phone, let her know I’m okay. He was confused but he did it.” You relaxed hearing that, as did Natalie. Yua ventured, “Are you sure that’s what you want to do? Adoption?”

You swallowed thickly, avoiding eye contact. The two of them were quiet, waiting for you to figure out how to answer. “I’m not sure,” you whispered, breaking the silence.

~~~

Tags: @imsonick , @alexakeyloveloki, @kvzctam, @ironlady1993​, @taintedgenre, @inlovewiththefictionalcharacters @roxyfan14-blog

[incarnateirony]

15.15: The Absent Mother

I’ve had to take a great deal of time to pull my thoughts together on this episode because it was so MUCH. I’ve said in the past that I wasn’t a fan of Davy; he often layered his things very thinly. But today was a masterfully interwoven piece to the point I literally watched another show for an hour while thinking about it, went and took a shower for half an hour to scrub my head clean, and came back to this and STILL sat to write about it.

So if you’re new to my meta, I’m going to break the ice. You need to read my The Generational Family post to dip your toes in. It speaks in plain english things that will be less-plain english in this post.

If you’re less-new to my meta, but often floating in the occult references, I’m going to try to drop links to posts or tag folders of references.

But what a fantastic salute to the Empress this entire episode is.

Now let’s dive in.

It’s no secret my blog bangs on about arcana on the regular. I have spoken of the four colors (represented in the above gif but also frequenting the #hues of involution tag). 

Frankly, I consider it invariable that the brother focused episode will summon forth The Emperor as a key focus. Somewhere in that chaos binder of tags I even predicted that much when I saw the color themes of the episode, but that’s a whole other aside--just something to put a pin in the idea of while I speak of the Empress, and the Generational Family.

(15.16 update: hahahahah)

I’ve gone feral

BACK TO ORIGINAL 15.15 POST

Some time back I had made a post about Castiel’s tie to this path; be that his frequent association with Mary over time (be it storyline parallels in general arc, John and Mary’s meeting, mixtapes or whatever else); that he and Rowena served as mirror and foil from her earliest conception, back when his parental storylines hovered more in regret over Claire; that Amara and her forced bond were associations of the profound bond and many lines directly mirrored while other motions challenged each other (Eg, heart tie, profound bond>mark bond);

I even made a joke at one point that Castiel should wear a pink trenchcoat to match Rowena’s dress.

This, of course, I joked equally was absurd, and that we would probably have to settle for the violet-pink light of Death on both him and Dean in 15.13′s alchemical Marriage of the Minds.

This Marriage of the Minds you’ll find plenty of topic on for my blog, and all in association with the Art arcana, from which the Occultum is drawn to begin with in its concept. This may seem like a long drift aside from the episode itself, but is more a preface of discussion based reminders.

Either way, @meta-mania-spn​ outright trolled in to my trenchcoat joke with this when it was released, saying “here’s your pink trenchcoat.”

And how on point you were!

But I’m going to have to ask fandom to do me a favor before we continue any further in this discussion.

I’m going to need you to stop trying to shove everything in singular boxes applicable to one and only-one storyline. Go back to the Generational Family post. Make sure that’s anchored like, in your subconscious at this point. Know it, feel it. 

Okay, now we can continue.

Hah hah “You’re standing in The Trap zone.” Okay.

So obviously, we have two major story ends going on right now: On the one hand, Sam and Dean go have a discussion to Amara where they plan to lie to her to pull off a stunt against Chuck; on the other hand, we have Castiel and Jack working a case. This seems simple enough in our structure.

Amara’s face of this ends up being entirely reflection. Of her cosmogenic origins (”We are the same.”), We Are Twins (I point to Thoth’s use of the twins in generational storytelling), etc. Of her history with Dean. Of her reasons of bringing Mary back.

Fandom may not like her reasons for bringing Mary back. They may even hate them. And we’ll get back to this later, but this is the sum of this.

On the other hand, Cas and Jack think a demon is involved. They even summon one. Turns out Rowena, in taking over hell, has adopted a new system. No more tricking and damning souls. People end up where they belong. The demon is bored (which has a funny shout out at the end on him trying to find a new purpose--as a cop, which is about six levels of commentary but I digress), but the continued path of Rowena renovating hell from welcome meetings for damned souls to lack of intentionally dragging others down is made clear, while evoked.

I point back to Rowena’s own history: at one point she aspired for power, but after Funeralia, she was stricken with guilt and grief over feeling like she abandoned her son. This is a thread that I have tried to put in videos over time as a still-binding tie; Castiel staring into Belphegor’s husked out eyes at one point, even if it wasn’t really his fault, just as we lost Rowena who went to essentially reclaim her son’s legacy and throne since she couldn’t atone for his loss.

But then we get to the case. It’s a whole long adventure, much of which has some bog-standard casework; we do have Castiel coming to speak that he found new meaning in becoming a parent (rolling back to the parental thread), and there’s a bunch of great imagery we’ll cover below. But before we get to that, let’s focus on the resolution.

It reveals a broken family structure: Mother was sick and felt shoved away, Father Changed Things, and the child ended up on a destructive path about following god.

Now when I talk about not boxing things in on one level, I’m going to break down this family a bit.  We’ll also just totes ignore the Joseph-the-Carpenter tattoo on the pastor that clearly has NOTHING to do with Joseph behind Dean only an episode ago and the entire Emperor theme with the sun behind his head. After the whole Mary behind Cas thing. Nope, nothing to see here. Has NOTHING to do with the generational stuff I’m about to talk below. That’d be silly right?

You also have to think of it this way. If Pastor Joe (yes that’s his FKING name) a parallel, so is his dead wife. There are levels where it was felt she was mocked, and pushed away, which tied into Amara this episode. You have your Chuck and Amara level parallel. However, on the emotional level, the mother figure that Castiel actually ends up representing is also coming due to be absent. And this is about the father's atonement with that just as much as it is with Dean having his dialogue with Amara.

On many levels. Dean and Amara’s dialogue trades of old grudges, old motivations, but also current events and learning to live in the now. 

The child, however, was still stuck in the past--a past the mother who told her to believe in God seemed to want, but the same kind of duty Castiel became aware of needing to change in the past. But she got stuck in it.

While she judged people by their sins, Jack and Castiel end up finding the poor unfortunate man judged by Lust, after an entire aside Castiel had with the pastor about one of the victims struggling as a gay man and what-not; For Reasons(TM). But this is an arcana post, not a “point out the obvious fucking screaming queer text and subtext being put in blinker lights this episode” post, so I’m going to generally show that the misguided and wrathful child thought she was carrying out God’s will.

And then I direct you to my Lust tag.

I have far longer stuff on it, but if you skim, you’ll find the loudest message is about not letting a wrathful god judge or punish you for sins. It involves the Whore of Babylon as a symbol of power riding a beast that represented (Aleister) Crowley; or in this case, Rowena riding Crowley to power, but also birthing and rearranging a new world. I point back to the demon in question, and then I gesture to the stuff about Castiel’s impending storyline overlap.

Did other sins get punished, sure; the one girl got greed, for example. If you check my posts on the Lust topic, there are other forms of debauch actually associated with lust beyond just carnal lovers, but the message about ignoring god’s wrath and making the new world remains in-tact.

This is the kind of wrath enacted by the girl. Who is furious about how the aeon changed. Because you changed everything, dad. They don’t worship God, they worship You.

So here’s the fun question: Is this a child of man furious that man is no longer the true god because Chuck in the corrupted Emperor path has changed the world to his whims, just flipped? That is to say, that they no longer see the Shadow as The One True God? Or is this someone throwing a tantrum on Chuck’s behest that the world of man is being reclaimed? Or is it a generalized moral of all of these things contingent on the choices The Ones -- Sam and Dean -- make moving forward? And what of Jack inevitably feeling like he has to do Dean’s commands, with the task laid out to destroy God as mapped by Death, in the inevitable absence of Castiel?

Now this has drifted a wide-berth from speaking of the Empress herself, which I’ll roll back to. I had mentioned, for example, the pink. So let’s talk about why that is.

The Empress is the Matron. While she goes through many forms, this is sort of the central or individualized one. She represents a fertility in preparing to birth the new world. She holds a blossom, she takes a pose I’m not gonna bother breaking down in this post, and she is crowned in a sphere that is passed to her from the Emperor which she will wear until the next aeon from their union is born.

She is represented by the moon, and though her child will eventually become the new sun it must first be the earth, her emperor is her current sun; the son is the reflection of the father in the eyes of the mother; the Empress Moon lets the Emperor Sun shine on her face and brings life to the earth in their union, and again, I point back to the Marriage of the Minds post.

Now, see that bird in the corner? That’s a pelican. It’s frequently associated in old alchemy as the mother giving her life, as part of the birthing process is also death, for her next generation. I have spoken in the past that Byzantium itself is an ideal example of that. The pelican has intensive alchemical implications, but it was believed she “fed her child from her own heart.”

Okay cool so there’s just a bleeding heart right there while Jack struggles with feeling like he has to deal with this alone, while Castiel tries to insist he doesn’t, with the renegade child taking it upon herself to carry out god’s work and essentially going mad/bad. Castiel not wanting to let that all fall on Jack.

There’s also giant posters about THE WORLD and a mirror shadow Safe Place poster which I’m not even going to talk on much beyond gesturing vaguely at my Shadow tag and Universe tag and move on, but I will take particular note of the hands reaching out to Cas and the world as a vague gesture to once again stick a pin in.

I mean there’s a few other themes I’m going to point out for general notes: hearts everywhere,

Some stuff on Day and Night and hands all over/handholding, which I’ll point to my talk on Absence for false dichotomies

And an admittedly offtopical “lmao fuck this news screen”

But with that, I move forward:

The child here was dressed almost EERILY like Mrs Butters, for the record. And uh-- /wore her cross upside down/

They both kind of represent the same thing of misguided ideals, though Mrs Butters proved able to be reasoned with at the end and went to go return to nature where she belonged, just as man should return to his place some day free of god’s machinations; but she didn’t break her cycle and her fate is to be decided after this by court and what-not, which.. you know, fine.

But that’s a note worth passing re: Mrs Butters, but again, it needs to fall to generational; child vs parent, with Mrs Butters being the lightly lamia-associated elder who lost her sons and went mad trying to protect them according to how she had been commanded, just like this story, too, comes to misguided commands in absence.

Add in of course that Butters pointed out Jack was “too much like his father”. This, of course, was a shot at Lucifer in a way, but the serpent she evoked isn’t truly symbolic of Lucifer in our show, it’s about humanity. And uh, who is synonymous synced to in SPN? Even ignoring the relevance of the serpent to the Emperor? 

Throughout this episode, Jack waltzes around imprinted on habits from Dean, taking on the weight of the world, sacrifice, doing it alone, and inevitably, small bursts of anger.

While... Amara tracks and polka dances sideways across the Mary issue of idealizations vs realities, of the Now being more important than the Then. Fandom gets stuck on how unfair it was to Dean and considers it torture which, human perspective, fair. But Amara isn’t thinking on your human level. In fact she very loudly flags around how Dean (and frankly, the audience) doesn’t properly perceive the scope of what she even is. 

Castiel, driving home, continues to try to be an improved parent. He talks with Jack, and tries to tell him he doesn’t have to do this alone. But Jack is stuck in that rut, and it’s a rut Castiel knows too well. He’s walked these paths and the audience has walked these paths and he can’t let the child handle this alone, though Jack declares it isn’t his choice. Jack has surrendered to what he believes Death commands of him, what the job is.

It’s going to be about choice.

But right now, Jack is too much like his father. And I point back to the Moon, who lets the Sun shine on her face, perceiving the world as a reflection of the Father, of Soul in the eyes of the Mind. This is the path to teach their son to avoid just as much.

Meanwhile, Castiel is punched in the FACE basically by Jack saying not to tell Sam and Dean he’s turning into Soul Bomb Take 2. He doesn’t want to worry them over something he can’t do anything about. Congratulations, Castiel is now living the mirror of Jack knowing the Empty deal and Sam and Dean not being told, and you can SEE the reality of it ALL slam him in the face. Not just because Jack blowing up would negate the point of his sacrifice; I don’t know if that even really plinks his mental armor; but the actual magnitude of that kind of secret.

Burying my clown brain’s fierce desire to talk at length of small details like Cas opting not to wake Dean up in the room, we see a recursion-yet-subversion at the end. 

We cut off, here, abruptly. In context of the episode, we know Castiel has at least learned one lesson and is going to try to tell Dean about his deal. But on some level, this all enmeshes thoroughly to Castiel’s Empty deal. Do I think Cas is going to tell the Empty deal in 16? No, I’m gonna guess on some level Sam gets his hands on it around 17 maybe, or nobody at all finds out--or at least Dean himself doesn’t find out--until 18.

In that time they *still* will not have stopped Chuck, that won’t be until 19. So I really wish this arm flailing about “oh god they’re making it all about Cas saving Jack and then dropping it!” would stop because man guys, I’m tired, I’ve been writing you the roadmap on this for two years and haven’t failed yet, pls listen.

Even after episode 18, Castiel’s role is inevitably going to be to take the burden from Jack. ...And Dean will too, but you won’t really even start to wrap your heads around the how and the why until at *least* 16 covers the Emperor path better in scale of the generational family. That’s going to be a joint thing.

Yes, I’m saying that’s going to be a joint thing after the Empty.

The show has taken a highlighter repeatedly to the fact that Jack was neither ready to rule or remove Chuck and that it was all a bad idea. Like “Then who?!” yes HMMM WHO. 

Who is sitting here following the path of all of these individuals in this very episode? Do I need to gesture people to literal years of Castiel being associated with every one of these women’s central stories in my meta, make everyone read literal compendiums of it to get the where and why, or is it at least enough in the collective subconscious to be recognized?

What is Rowena doing? What is Rowena doing, right now? She unbirthed an entire realm and is restructuring it; where people go only where they deserve to go, where they aren’t as boxed in but certainly aren’t out there being shitheads for the sake of being shitheads. But man, if only there was SOME ONE ELSE lined up on this whole lunar path, somewhere, with these women.

(For more on the blossom, see my Albedo tag)

For the full context and, frankly, mental breakdowns about 15.13 and what all that amounted to, I point you to the tags I linked above in discussion and lead-in to this post, because I’m not going to re-tread that ground right now.

But Castiel’s deal has always been about saving Jack. Castiel has been the Empress all year and before it. He will continue to be the empress, symbolized as feeding her young from her own heart, and--well, like that above gif (and also like 15.09, but with Sam in that generational rotation), receiving the sphere from the Emperor (Dean) and passing it to the new aeon to be reborn. Jack is the new Aeon. the mother will protect this at any cost.

But I don’t know why fandom pole vaults into assuming then that the Emperor suddenly has no place in this fascinatingly interwoven play. They are part of this cooperative birthing process together. Even in and beyond Death. As it is, there’s parts of Jack’s resignation that will inevitably tie to Castiel with Dean in 18.

As always, the case is a warning tale, but just what side of it you take really depends on where the characters choose to step. Is it a warning of man stepping away from god or god changing the rules on man? 

Even Amara’s message is multifaceted: Knowing when to walk away on your own path is not the same as betraying someone. And it’s only going to be by Dean’s manipulation that she would consider it, while he is in fact lying to her; but that’s NOT going to come without a long term price. And frankly, is itself a message for the endgame of this show, with some people thinking taking ones’ own path is tantamount to betrayal. It is not. But what matters it the truth. And the choice. And remembering that we all have a choice.

And what of Cas, after the Empty then?

My soul went to heaven, big surprise.

In order to be in the Occultum, the Occultum must be in you.

To know what he, himself, is also worth, Castiel will have to make that place within himself. And that will also be the place for his child, and his family, and humankind as he has come to adopt as his people.

...But there was a two step phase to that spell and I remind you Rowena wasn’t alone in that image.

The pink of fertile rebirth.

For more on the Empress, click here. 

Anyway

#CASTIELSUTERUS2020

[yamithediaperdork]

Back to babyhood (kingdom hearts)

Sora woke with a start as his Micky mouse alarm went off. Looking around wildly and figuring out it wasn't a attack of some sort (he was kinda a dork for the first few minutes he was awake) he reached over and shut the alarm off and then sat there for a second, closing his eyes and building up for a reveal. He'd managed to keep his bed and pants clean for a whole 29 days so far, and if he was dry and clean, this would make it 30 and Rikku had promised to let him back in the master bedroom if he could prove he wasn't a big baby anymore. 'Moment of truth..' Sora thought and pulled the blankets back and then opened his left eye slowly and looked down, then both eyes. a big silly grin broke out over his face, he was all good! his white dino  print jammies weren't brown or wet and there was NO stains on the bed. "YES! HAHAHAHA! I AM KING OF THE BIG BOYS!" Sora cheered and jumped up and down on his bed, pumping his fists into the air. "would the king of the big boys like to get dressed and come out for pancakes?" Came his boyfriend/daddies voice and sora stopped jumping and locked eyes with Rikku, then jumped off the bed and ran over. "I did it! no poopie or pee and that means I get to sleep in bed with you tonight!" Sora said, super excited. "Mhmmm..as long as you stay clean during the day..and you know what happens when you get too excited. go get dressed and use the can, I'll go and finish making breakfast for my king." Rikku chuckled and winked, then ruffling Sora's hair he took off. 'hmmff..Of course I can keep my pants clean during the day! that's not even a concern anymore!' Sora thought with a huff. still, it was better to do what Rikku wanted then argue with him, just because he was out of diapers and pull ups didn't mean he couldn't take a trip over rikku's lap. Since he had to work in a little under a hour Sora decided to put on his uniform and save time. It wasn't as fun or colorful as a lot of his other outfits but it wasn't suppose to be. A pale blue shirt with the general store on the corners logo on it, and a pair of black dress pants..it wasn't even like he actually needed the job with all the money him and Rikku had made while saving the world. Rikku though controlled the money as back when Sora had been..well ok, a total big baby in a big boys body, he hadn't exactly been responsible with money. or much of anything. That's not to say that Sora really wanted for much, but Rikku would only dole out the cash in allowances with this month marking the first time he'd trusted sora to hold the money himself. The Job at the store was more about teaching responsibility to Sora as well as give him something to focus on and keep him from slipping back into baby mood. Getting him the job had been touch and go, as Sora was well known enough around town as a big baby no one was really willing to hire him. Rikku had pointed out to the store manger, Malcore, That with all the diapers and other stuff they had bought there over the years Sora deserved a chance.

Rikku smirked at how damn proud Sora looked as he walked out, and then chuckled as the so called big boy started to drool seeing the spread on the table. Don't get Rikku wrong, he was glad that Sora was finally returning to adulthood such as it was (the boy had never been the most mature 18 year old even before the diapers) but the constant dirty diaper smell in the house and having to change a minuim of 4 dirty diapers a day wasn't as fun as one might think. "heh, watch the drool buddy." Rikku said and came over with a dish towel and wiped sora's chin anyways for him. "O-Oh yeah..ehehe sorry..just..yowie wowie! Were you up all night cooking?" Sora asked. on the table there was a stack of pancakes, a dish with bacon, some slices of ham, a dish filled with scrambled eggs and of course two pitchers of Milk and OJ. "No, I just got up a little early and assumed you'd be a big boy and wanted to celebrate." Rikku said and kissed Sora's cheek. "And it's all for me?" Sora asked. "Well, I'd like to have SOME of it,guessing I should make my plate first?" Rikku laughed then added "Just don't go too hog wild, you don't wanna stuff yourself and be on the can all day at work..again." "O-Oh Malcore called you about that huh?" Sora said sheepishly. "Well Roxas complained about having to work the floor alone..Speaking of which, is roxas coming over again today after work?" "IIIII dunno. I'll ask him when i get there." Sora said and took a seat. Rikku let it drop and fixed himself a plate and then tried to look away as Sora wolfed down the food with such gusto you were swear he hadn't eaten for days. He wasn't the biggest fan of Roxas for a few reasons, the first one being that he was trying to encourage Sora to baby out. the second was that he knew for a fact Roxas was getting into the stash of left over diapers at the house, and helping himself. Rikku had been semi sure that Roxas was a little diaper thief back before Sora got out of his huggies, though it was hard to keep track of back then.. but with no new diapers coming in to replace missing ones he'd kept count. Still he was Sora's best friend and as long as he didn't end up making sora land back in diapers just so he didn't have to buy his own, Rikku would let it slide.

Roxas whined as he looked though his underwear drawer, and then under his bed..there was no two ways about it: he was out of diapers again. It just wasn't fair (at least in his twisted little mind) that Sora had to go and screw him over like this.Like, he put up with how toxic and stinky Sora could be, and watched the dumb baby shows with him (never mind Roxas actually liked the shows just as much and wasn't exactly a rosebush when he loaded his diapers) and now Sora had to go and ruin it all by trying to become a stupid big boy and cut him off from his supply of diapers! sure Roxas COULD of gone and brought his own diapers, but he'd seen the smirks and snickers everyone gave when Sora had been getting his and didn't wanna risk that. He did after all have a reputation to keep. So naturally like any clever baby, Roxas decided to do the only thing he could do..which meant turn sora back into a diaper baby so he could go back to stealing diapers from him without worrying about Rikku noticing. To THAT end he made a special lunch just for Sora, and had prepped some video's for his bestie to watch, and he'd have him loading his pants like a CHAMP in no time. Any guilt he might of felt over turning Sora back into a diaper filling baby was taken away by the anger of Sora making him have to go days at a time without a diaper to wear at home..and the belief that Sora would be happier in diapers. Really, more people needed friends like him.

Sora got a text from Roxas partway though his munching and smirked. "Don't worry about packing me a lunch today, Roxas made me one to make up for being a brat when i kicked his butt at chocobo racing on Sunday." Sora giggled. "heh, well at least he admits it..I thought he was gonna smash the controller before I told him to knock it off before I'd have to spank his butt." Rikku chuckled. "Anyways, I should go brush my teeth and start walking for work." Sora said, belching one last time and wiping his mouth with a napkin. "Breakfast was AWESOME, thanks da- Rikku." Sora blushed a little, catching himself at calling his boyfriend daddy, since that was what he did as a big BABY, but it wasn't always easy. Rikku just smiled and tapped his left cheek and tilted his head, and Sora took the hint. walking over he planted a big old smooch on Rikku's cheek then went off to finish getting ready for anther glorious day in retail.

Malcore yawned, he'd had to pull the night shift due to DT going back to collage and was mostly getting though on coffee. In truth if it hadn't of been for the fact  that Josh and DT had been forced to cut back on their hours he would of never hired Sora or Roxas. Lord knows what head office would of thought if they had seen what a massive diaper dork Sora had been before, and it wasn't hard to see Roxas was a diaper dork just waiting to happen, if he wasn't just one at home. Still, faced with risking coming into find the two playing in diapers in the baby section or covering all the hours himself, Malcore had made his choice. That didn't mean though as Sora and Roxas came in and went to clock in he didn't give them a once over..Sniffling the air and making sure there was no baby powder or 'other' baby smells, and of course eyeing their butts to see if they were padded. truthfully it wasn't hard to tell on that front, the diapers these two seemed to favor, or at least he'd seen sora wear/Roxas eyeball on the shelf, tended to be super thick diapers that left nothing to the imagination. assured that they weren't padded, Malcore went over what had to get done, and assigned Roxas on cleaning duty (As in sweeping the floors once a hour, and checking on the public bathroom) which, of course got a face from Roxas.. and then assigned Sora to handling all shipping and receiving stuff, in case any shipments came in. His work done, malcore walked out mentally praying that they could keep being big boys, he just didn't have it in him today to come in and have to put up with poopie diaper boys.

The boys handled the first part of the shift fine, they had a mild early morning rush of people stopping off for coffee or snackage on their way into work, not to mention a few kids/teenagers in school stopping off for the same. Of course a lot of these kids had seen Sora back in his diapered baby days and half of them seemed to be there least to pick up something, and more to see if he was back to being a big baby. (this of course made Sora huffy, But as Malcore pointed out, it brought in customers so Sora had better just suck it up buttercup.) with the morning rush over, the boys decide that despite what malcore had said, they would split their duties with each other, and So after best two out of three of rock scissors paper lizard Spock Roxas swept the floor while sora cleaned the bathroom, complaining the whole time. "Dear god, are they even TRYING to get it in the bowl! And they think -I'M- the one who should be in diapers!" came sora's wail from the bathroom, making Roxas snicker. "now now, don't be a sore loser..if you would pick something besides Spock you might of won a round." Roxas called back. "I call hack's!" Sora whined, but finished cleaning and came out. "would you feel better if we took our break early? I got some video's I wanna show you." Roxas said. "HECK YEAH!" Sora said, and despite himself, he wiggled his butt..a hold over from his little guy days.

they didn't go to the break room since well, with two of them on, one of them had to stay upfront anyways, so the boy's plopped down behind the front counter and Roxas took out some of the homemade chocolate chip cookies he'd made, trying to make sure he gave the tainted ones with ex-lax chocolate used for the chips to Sora, while pulling up the special video's he'd prepped for Sora to watch. what Roxas didn't know was that while he had taken the time to prep two batches of the cookies, one which was sure to have a boy fudging his pants and one without, he'd gotten distracted thinking about all the diapers he was gonna steal and had only packed his laxative laced baked goods. there was no way to tell from the taste alone, and as they munched away, Sora watched the let's play video's Roxas had sent hours mixing with subliminal messages that would encourage the return of big baby Sora. "oh man! these guys are SO good at mega-man! I never even KNEW about some of these paths they're taking! Roxas, come see this!" Sora squealed excitedly, bouncing up and down in his seat, cookie crumbs goes down the front of his shirt as ate like a piggy despite his big breakfast, if there was one thing you could count on, no matter HOW full Sora got, he'd always have room for sweets. "I'm good, I already watched it. You watch that and I'll keep a eye on the door." Roxas said, finishing the last of his cookies too. "your the bestest friend ever!" Sora coo'ed, and wiggled like a happy toddler. clearly the messages were going to work already. 'Like sandblasting a soup cracker.' Roxas thought with a smirk. "heh, and don't you forget it."

Sora just couldn't stop smiling and giggling as he watched, and found himself re-watching certain parts of the same video over and over again. it never even dawned on him once that the happy giddy feeling he was experiencing could be traced back to the video, or that his bestest buddy in the whoooole world was setting him up to be a derpy diaper boy. he was kicking his legs and moving his head back and forth, though found himself getting bored with the let's play video's and since Roxas was dealing with a couple of collage students who had came in, he put in some headphones and switched over to YouTube and started to watch some Barney. he was just past the intro of the episode he had brought up when he looked up and noticed the two guys, and Roxas looking at him, and all three were smiling big time. Pausing the video and taking the headphones out, Sora looked back. "uhhh, can i help you?" he asked. "heh, no no, but you have a lovely singing voice." one of the students said and started laughing. "I loved just how into you got." the other said. "I-I wasn't singing!" sora huffed and blushed hotly. "Uh buddy? we know your watching barney, or at least the intro." Roxas said, smirking and shaking his head. "you can go back to it, but indoor voice please." he added. "o-oh.." Sora said in a soft voice, and put the headphones back and and glued his eyes to the screen, though now it was less a desire to watch the show and more just to block out the collage guys.

"heh, so are you like looking after him ot something or does he really work here?" The bigger of the two collage guys asked, sporting a brown crew cut. Just a few inches shorter, but with more of a barrel chest was a blond who was rocking a ponytail. "he's cute either way." the blond chimed in. "Yeah, he works here, but he's just a total dork. he gets paid in diapers." Roxas said, thinking up the lie on the spot. but his calculations, the cookies should be starting to kick in any second now, so he wagged his eyebrows. "in fact, any second now he's likely gonna start going off so we better get you two checked out befo-" he started when a super loud booming fart filled the store. only problem was it hadn't come from Sora, but Roxas who turned crimson. "heh, looks like there's more then one big baby in the store!" Blondie laughed. "Holy hell, did that hurt?" Crew cut asked, though he was holding his nose as a less then pleasure aroma had followed the blast of gas. "I uh..I er.." Roxas stammered, then quickly made his way behind the check out. "I-I think we b-better get you out of here b-before-" he tried to say only for anther back door blast to come out from his butt, a little wetter this time. as if taking it as a challenge, though he was engrossed in his show, Sora leaned to the side and while never taking his eyes off of the screen added to the hurricane of farts that was quickly rendering the store a toxic zone. "uh..I think we'll..get out drinks and snacks somewhere else.." Crew cut said, gagging a little and wiping at his eyes. "Yeahhh clearly the food here is tainted if you guys have been snacking on it." Blondie said, and the two guys left quick.

Sora drifted out of the zone he was in, when the smell finally hit him. he'd of course let out anther two farts before being knocked out of it, and Roxas had added in twice as many and was doing baby steps as he headed for the bathroom. "Hey Roxas, who cut the cheese?" Sora asked, clueless and was answered by a super gross and wet sounding fart from Roxas who froze in place, and had one hand on his tummy, and one on his butt, hunching over. "I guess that answers that." Sora said and slid out of his chair, on his way over to help his bestest buddy. or he was when a powerful cramp hit him and he hunched over, letting out a fart that sounded more like a foghorn then something that should of been possible for a human. "OWIE!" Sora cried out as it wasn't all that pleasant to let out, and Roxas whined and answered with a even worse sounding fart. "oh gawd, S-Sora..I think I'm gonna..gonna..." Roxas whined. "G-Gonna what?" the clueless Sora asked, shuffling slowly and getting up next to Roxas and then leaning on him, ending ANY shot Roxas might of had to get to the bathroom. "I'm gonna crap my pants!" Roxas wailed and then proceed to do so, bawling as the back of his undies puffed out and the back of his jeans showed what was happening. "M-me too!" Sora whimpered, and then bawled too as his bowels cut loose too and his own pants were ruined.

Being Sora's emergency contract and fairly responsible, Rikku always had his cell with him in case he was needed. Hence why even though he was relaxing in the tub, reading a novel he was quick to answer the phone when a call came though from the general store. It was hard to understand what was going on at first, though the wails and the sobbing, and Rikku had been cut off before he could even say hello, but soon enough he got the general idea of what had happened. It took about five minutes, during which time he got dried off and started to get dressed, but Rikku got both of the not so big boys calmed down to just gentle whimpers. "Sora, Buddy, You and Roxas get in the bathroom, I'll be down there as soon as possible with some clean pants..among other things. Ok?" "I..I..I DIDN'T MEAN TOOO! WAHHHHH!" Sora sobbed loudly, and in the back round Rikku could hear that he'd started Roxas up again. and so anther five minutes were used up as Rikku packed a diaper bag, there was only two of sora's diapers left. getting off the phone with the big babies he went out the door and right next door to where Roxas was living, and found the spare key under a flower pot right where Roxas had left it. he could of just just grabbed two pairs of Sora's pants but figured if a leak happened, he'd prefer it happen in Roxas's pants, not Sora's. he noticed a pink notice on the floor that had been put though the mail slot, but ignored it as he went into Roxas's room and while getting a pair of his pants, confirmed his belief that the brat was stealing diapers as he had a few wet ones in a trash can by his bed. "I'll have to put him on time out for that." Rikku said to himself and was heading back out the door when something on the kitchen counter caught his eye. coming into the kitchen he found a wrapper for some chocolate ex-ax, and there were cookies on the counter. recalling how sora had mentioned all they'd had were some cookies Roxas brought from home Rikku put 1 and 1 together. "..Forget a time out, he's getting his buns blistered!" Rikku growled. Storming out Rikku made his way double time to the store, now knowing he was gonna have to for SURE buy more diapers, there was no way those two weren't gonna be pooping their brains out al day.

Thankfully there was more then one potty in the bathroom, and Sora and Roxas were each on one, poopie undies and pants in the trash and holding onto the side of the potties while going again. "Oh gawd how do I still have bones left!?!" Roxas cried out. "I'm pooping lava!" Sora whined and whimpered. of course while Sora was clueless as to way he was pooping up a storm, Roxas knew full well why it was happening, and that this wasn't ending any time soon as he flushed. monkey see monkey do, Sora flushed too though even as they finished, both boys stayed seated, panting and gasping and exhausted. "Roxas..I dun think i want yer cookies anymore." Sora whined. "heh..fair..fair enough.." Roxas said, letting it go that Sora thought he was just a bad baker and not that this had been all by design, at least till he'd eaten them too. the boys sat there, willing their butt holes to close and suffered in silence, mostly. Roxas could hear the soft slurping noise of sora sucking his thumb. 'I hope that wasn't the hand he was wiping with..' Roxas thought and wrinkled his nose.

Rikku made it into the shop and was glad no one was inside, and nothing looked like it had been stolen. There was a awful stench in the air from the boys accidents and Rikku mused that it was likely the smell more then anything else had scared off any potential looters. He knew the place like the back of his hand, Sora had given him a grand tour (with permission from malcore) of the entire store after his first week, eager to show off, and besides that there was only the one bathroom for whole store that was shared by the customers and the staff alike. Making his way to the bathroom and taking shallow breath, Rikku paused to grab a few can's of air freshener. 'I doubt Malcore will mind me using these..better then coming into a store that smells like a diaper pail.' Rikku reasoned mentally, and then used up all of one can and half of the second. with THAT taken care of Rikku made his way into the bathroom and announced his arrival by making use of the second can and putting a arm to his mouth and nose. if it had smelled like a diaper pail out front, in the bathroom it was a dumpster of dirty diapers. "whew, you boys ok in here? you didn't break the potties did you?" he called. From the stall closet to him Roxas's voice started to answer he was ok, but it was drowned out by Sora's voice in the stall closet to the window. "Daddy!" Sora whimpered out, and the door open and the naked from the waist down save for his socks and shoes Sora ran out and glomped Rikku. Rikku smiled and set the can down on the sink, then wrapped one arm around Sora and used the other to pat the boys head. "Daddy I'm sowwy! I don't know why but my bum won't l-listen to me and i just wanna wear my diapies and hug you and and I don't think I'm a big boy anymore and i just wanna be your babbbby!" Sora whimpered and wailed, nuzzling his head into Rikku's chest and getting his shirt damp with tears. "shhh it's ok Sora..it's oook. We're just gonna get you and Roxas dressed, and then we'll finish out your shift, all three of us ok? Then I'll talk with malcore and let him know you'll be quitting." Rikku said and rubbed the big babies back, then tilted his head up and kissed his forehead. Switching his gaze to the stall that roxas was in, Rikku cleared his throat. "are you just gonna hide in there, or you wanna come out too? I can give you a hug if you need one as well." rikku said. he'd been half joking when he made the offer of course, but wasn't shocked when the door opened and Roxas took a spot on the side of Rikku and whimpered and sobbed too.

Getting both boys fully cleaned up, Rikku wasn't shocked when neither one of them protested to the diapers he'd brought (in fact both of them had gotten a little 'exited' while he was powdering them) but then there came a problem that Rikku for all his skills as a daddy hadn't foreseen. the pants barely fit over the diapers, and there was no way to button them or zip them up. "er..who wants to go pants-less for the rest of their shift?" Rikku asked, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly after the tenth attempt to get either of them zipped up failed. "oh oh! Me! MEEEE!" Sora said, holding up his left hand and giggling. now that he had been told it was ok to go back to being a baby, he'd grabbed it with both hands so to speak and gladly kicked off his pants. "Now everyone can see how cute my diapies are daddy!" he giggled and wiggled his butt. Roxas on the other hand, turned pale. "No! no no no no no!" he whined and as if it was somehow Rikku's fault for not trying hard enough, hopped up and down tugging on the dress pants trying to force them up. "Come onnn work with me you stupid things!" Roxas whined, looking like a huffy toddler and Sora giggled and snuggled into daddy watching the show. "er..Roxas..i don't think it's gonna work. you might as well give up before you-" Rikku started. he was cut off as a loud rip was hear and the ass of the pants ripped open, along with the crotch of them. "..rip them." Rikku finished, trying not to laugh at the look of shock and embarrassment on Roxas face. "I..but..DAMN IT!" Roxas yelled and grabbed at the rip and tore it all, venting his frustrations at the poor pants while Sora gasped and covered his ears. "Daddy! he said a bad word!" Sora cried out. "I think we'll let him have a mulligan on that one buddy." Rikku said and gave Sora a side hug. A side hug that apparently helped whatever was left in the boys system come out because Sora yelped and then hugged Rikku tight and buried his face into his side as he started to load his diaper. not to be out done and with the remains of his pant's in his hands, Roxas dropped to a squat and used one hand to brace himself on the floor as the other arm clutched at his tummy. the back of both boy's white and chocobo print diapers puffed out rapidly and the chocobo's vanished from the back and front as they wet themselves while loading their diapers. '..oh good. because one stinky baby wasn't enough.' Rikku thought sweat dropping as the wails started again. "DADDDDY!" Came the twin cries, at the same time and Rikku wondered if maybe, just maybe..the two had practiced to nail such perfect timing.

Helping himself to a pack of the extra thick nighttime diapers off the shelf, and keeping track of what he'd owe Malcore, Rikku got the big babies changed even as they hiccuped and whined. the sobs and complaints about the design of the diapers (have just generic moons and stars on them) were muffled as Rikku also snagged a package of pacifiers from the shelf and popped one in each boys mouth. red mouth guard for Sora, yellow for Roxas. the big babies sucked on their paci's and wiped at their tears with one hand, but also were (Squeal!) holding each others hands for support while Rikku got them changed. He tried to get them to stand up and find something for them to do once they were nice and safe in their diapers, but the boys legs were shaken and they both looked wiped. considering how much they had pooped out and how fast it had happened, it wasn't really all that surprising though really. Rikku added to his mental tab and got a couple of baby bottle off of the shelf and then some Gatorade and filled the bottles up. the electrolyte's in the juice would help them feel better in a bit, though they were both falling asleep. Looking around the store, Rikku spotted a play pen that was on display in the back and tilted his head. 'It'll be a little cramped..but it's the best I can do.' he thought. With the big babies fading fast and rubbing their eyes even as they sucked on their ba-ba's (Rikku had made use of paci clips and ribbons so the paci's just hung from the boys work shirts)  Rikku got them both up and set on either hip and carried them down to the playpen. "Ok sleepyheads, you two are gonna go night night for awhile ok? Daddy will be here when you wake up. I know the play pen is gonna be a little cramped, but it's the best I can do on short notice." Rikku said. there was no fight left in the big babies and they just slowly nodded. 'If they were only so cute and agreeable ALL the time.' Rikku thought to himself. of course just because Roxas was all cute and helpless NOW didn't mean he wasn't going to get punished later. it just meant Rikku was willing to let him work this this if for no other reason then bare bottom spanking a oversized big baby when they have the runs will ALWAYS end badly. Gently setting them in the playpen, Rikku couldn't help but grin like a fool and lean over the edge and watch as the more asleep then awake baby snuggled right into each other and let the ba-ba's drop and then (BIG squeal!) popped each others paci in the others mouth as they went off to dream land.'...OK..maybe having two big babies is gonna be worth the extra stink.' Rikku mentally gushed. grabbing a blanket he put it over the sleeping babies, and then went to work cleaning up.

Malcore was NOT happy as he made his way back to the store. the manger had been woken up from a dead sleep by a deliver man bringing certain ..packages.. to his place but when malcore had gone to take his wallet out to show ID he'd realized he'd forgotten it back at the store. Thankfully the guy cut him a break and let him get his packages but now the half asleep and grumpy Manger had to walk ALL the way to and ALL the way back to the store, because he'd been a dumb ass and let his next door neighbor borrow his car. "No good deed goes fucking unpunished." Malcore grumbled. walking into the shop he noticed a heavy fruity scent in the air and groaned. "Roxas, Sora, I swear if you two were playing fart war again Il.." Malcore started and then blinked as it was Rikku who was behind the counter, not one of his employee's. "oh uh..Hey Malcore." Rikku said. "is there a reason your behind the counter right now and not one of the two dorks i pay to be hind the counter?" Malcore asked. before Rikku could answer however there was a loud snore from the back of the shop. Holding a hand up to shush Rikku, Malcore walked over and looked down to the back of the store and yup, there was Sora and Roxas, asleep in a playpen. "..Do I wanna know the full details or do I wanna just save the head ache and fire them both and pray I can get someone else in to cover their shift?" malcore asked, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "..if it helps you've made about a $100 bucks off of them from everything I've had to buy and plan to leave with." Rikku said sheepishly. "Uh-huh.. I'll just be keeping their last pay checks, and you can sit here till I convince DT or Josh or Lute to come in. flip side, you can load up on what you need for them on the way out after I get a replacement in here." "heh, deal." 'And they wonder why I need my stress relief so much.' Malcore thought and headed for the office.

after about 45 minutes DT came into the store, looking pouty and smelling of baby power but dressed and ready for work. he did stop to gush and coo at how cute the big babies looked even if by that point Roxas and Sora had been changed into clean diapers and put into a black mage print onesie for Roxas, and a chocobo print one for Sora. they were also in a double stroller with lots of diapers packed in the undercarriage. Sora giggled and coo'ed as DT baby talked and tickled his chin while Roxas was red faced and sucking on his paci, hugging a teddy bear after finding out he'd been canned. "Who's a widdle cutie, who's a cute widdle big baby?" DT gushed and coo'ed. "hehehehe Meeee!" Sora gurgled in babyish tone and clapped his hands. "That's right! such a clever boy!" DT said and tapped Sora on the nose, then turned his attention to Roxas."Awww don't look so grumpy, your a big baby t-" DT started to say but Roxas shot him a look and DT gulped and moved away from the front of the stroller. "Er..yeah..so..I think that cuteness makes up for getting woken up." DT said, squeaking a little as he talked to Rikku "Right. you were were sleeping." Rikku said, giving a knowing look to the clerk. After all a professional daddy like Rikku knew a big baby when he saw one.

Wheeling the babies out of the shop they headed home with Sora going out of his way to wave hi to people and get attention from anyone they came across, the video had fried any sense of modesty from him and Roxas could only try and hide behind his stuffed bear as he thought he had a reputation to protect. Of course everyone on the block knew he was just as much of a big baby as Sora, but for the most part no one said anything because when confronted he had a habit of going into a high pitched whining denial speech and the whine could get SO high pitched dogs would howl. Making it back to Rikku and Sora's place first, Rikku got the stroller inside and then let the babies out while he unloaded everything from it. "Look uh..I'm glad you bailed us out and everything..but..I'm gonna go home." Roxas said, huffing a little as he stood there dressed like a big baby. "Well before you go, I figured you might want these..and know that I know what you did." Rikku Said, handing two of the large packs of diapers to Roxas and giving the big baby a look. The color drained from the big babies face and he stammered and whined a little as Sora who had been crawling over to go and play with some toys turned around and looked confused. "what did he do daddy?" the big aby asked. "Oh, nothing you need to worry about little guy. but he'll be coming over later to get punished for it. right Roxas?" Rikku said and looked Roxas right in the eyes. a wet fart escaped the blond and he gave a weak smile. "I.I..Uh..Yes sir." he said meekly. he briefly wondered about just trying to put it off and avoid contract with Rikku for like a week or so and see if this would just blow over. "And you know the longer you wait to take your licks, the worse it's going to be right?" Rikku added. 'Well shit.' Roxas thought. "I-I Understand sir." Roxas said, anther wet fart coming out and some bubbly ones coming from sora too. "if I was you, I'd either get my butt home before you end up unloading on the front lawn or just stay in here for anther diaper change." Rikku advised. Roxas went to say something but a bubbling fart had him change his mind and dash out the door, racing home.

Luck was on Roxas side, or so it seemed at first as he made it to his place and got inside before the churning in his tummy tum had him drop to his knees and start filling out the seat of his diaper once again. by this point he was basically used to the helpless feeling of crapping himself, though it still kinda hurt and burned. As he groaned and grunted and loaded his huggies, the door closed thankfully, he noticed the pink paper on the floor and gulped. even before he picked it up to read it he had a fairly good idea what it was going to say. he was maybe a month or two..ok 4 months behind on rent and had kept promising to make payments but then would go ahead and blow all his money on video games and the like. this mean he was the envy of every other boy on the block but as he looked the notice over, it also meant he had a week to move his stuff out. He was being evicted. "what did I do to deserve all of this!" Roxas cried out loud as he finished pooping his pampers and slowly got up to his feet using the wall for balance. a quick look in the kitchen and seeing the chocolate ex-lax wrapper reminded him. "..DAMN IT!"

Rikku was in the middle of changing Sora, who was busy sucking on his paci and playing with a stuffie as Rikku handled the the dirty deed, when the door bell rang. Since Sora was all clean and just waiting on a fresh diaper Rikku rubbed his belly. "you gonna be ok here for a second champ while I answer the door?" he asked. Sora nodded and went back to playing with his stuffie and Rikku made his way to the door quickly. It wasn't that he didn't trust Sora to stay put, it was more of he didn't wanna come back and find out he had peed all over himself. Opening the door Rikku was semi shocked to find Roxas back already, he hadn't been gone that long. A strong breeze blew and even if Roxas's diaper hadn't of been sagging in his onesie Rikku would of been able to tell that he was a stinky boy. "heh, you know, I'm not gonna change EVERY poo-" Rikku started, but was cut off. "I-I'm getting evicted..and..and..Can I move in with you guys for awhile?" Roxas asked, bottom lip trembling. "J-just till I get back on my feet!" Rikku thought about how Roxas had turned Sora back into a big baby, and gotten them both fired (though Sora again WAS gonna quit) and toyed with saying no. but in the end seeing the big baby scared and upset, he just couldn't bring himself to be mean. "I suppose so..but there are going to be some rules..but we'll go over them in a bit. first, let's get you changed into a clean diaper." Rikku said and ruffled Roxas hair. the big baby glomped him and Rikku just smiled.

Sora was more then a little excited at the prospect of having a brother to share his nursery with and babbled on and on about all the fun stuff the two of them were gonna do together as he sat on the floor in just a diaper and socks while Rikku changed Roxas. Rikku explained it was going to be din din time soon, the boys needed to get something in their systems and it was just easier to have big babies in diapers and socks while they ate. He also explained that as long as Roxas lived under his roof, he'd be treated JUST like Sora, which meant treated JUST like a big silly baby. no changing his own diapers, no using the potty, 7:30 pm bedtimes and the whole nine yards. If at any point Roxas had had enough and didn't wanna do it, he was always free to walk out the door. Sniffling as he heard the rules, Roxas thought about how all of this had started just so he could steal some diapers and pretend to BE a baby. Now he was trapped, with no job and no money..he was STUCK as a baby, It was a fitting punishment and fitting end for the blonds plans, and he STILL had a spanking to look forward to.  

THE END...For now.

[lydia-yougowith-stiles]

My Top Ships of 2020

It’s FINALLY here!! The list of my top ships of 2020. What a year it was and I can’t believe it’s already January 8th as I’m writing this. Just like I mentioned with my 2020 TV Wrap Up, a lot of these ships helped me escape during 2020. I can’t wait to see where they’re headed for 2021. I have also started watching a few things in December, but I will be saving those ships for my 2021 list. (You’ll notice I have already expanded this list from last year.) Last year, I debated about including an Honorable Mentions sections. This year I will be including it because I wanted to still talk about these ships, but found it hard to rank them with the others. Without further ado here we go!  

Oh! One last thing. Compared to previous years Bellarke has not made it on this list. J. Roth did us dirty with this last season of the 100 and I will pretend it didn’t exist. 

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

~ Anne with an E: Jerry and Diana

These two were SOOO CUTE until Diana started acting rude and left our perfect boy Jerry. Watching this last season back, I grew not to like this couple as much as I did the first time. This most definitely had to do with the fact that I knew the outcome AND I could see Diana using him more earlier. She wanted to experience something different and rebel and Jerry was there. But they were so cute as they walked home together and shared books. I’m also really proud of Anne for sticking by Jerry when she found out the truth about their relationship. (As you probably already know I love Jerry so much and don’t want any harm to come for him, so this was a tough one, but yes I’m still including it.) 

~Umbrella Academy: Klaus and Dave

I started watching Umbrella Academy this year, so I was lucky to not just experience the first season, but also the second. I instantly fell in love with Klaus and Dave and we barely got any scenes with them. (That’s my main reason for making them an honorable mention rather than a permanent spot on this list.) I wish we had more scenes with them in love. We do get some great moments in scene two with a younger Dave, which highlights Klaus’ love for him, but it’s not the same. I really love how much Dave changed Klaus. I would argue they’re my favorite romantic relationship on the show. 

~Walking Dead World Beyond: Hope and Elton

Here’s my classic shipping people together who weren’t technically romantic (but honestly those often make the best and most satisfying ships if the writers open their eyes to the chemistry that is on screen...but I digress). While they technically weren’t “romantic” you could tell that Elton grew to have a crush on Hope as the season went on. There was definitely a lot going on between their characters as Hope ***I’m going to try and avoid a spoiler here*** was one of the last people to see Elton’s mom. I think there’s potential for these two down the road and as there are only 2 seasons slotted for Walking Dead World Beyond, I can only hope this is the path the writers take. 

~Violetta: Angie and Pablo

Okay, so even if you have not heard of the Disney Channel telenovela “Violetta” or seen many of my posts, can you just appreciate the chemistry in the above moment between these two people! For a good amount of season 1 of the show, Angie and Pablo were the couple for me and I was ESTATIC when they finally got together. I anticipated it wouldn’t be for long because of slight spoilers and more intuition, but god were they beautiful together. Friends to lovers to the extreme. Screw Herman! Now as I’m slowing watching season 3, I know these two won’t be OTP, but I can savor in this moment and remember the good times. 

17. Violetta: Violetta and Leon

Two back to back Violetta appreciation posts. This show took up my entire 2020 from awaiting for season 2 (and 3) on Disney Plus, as well as watching the 80 episodes (a piece!). Currently, I’m trying to get back into wanting to watch season 3 (as other shows took precedent). With the amount of Violetta I watched, I couldn’t leave Violetta and Leon off this list. They were the favored ship of the show (and one of the most central). In season 1 it took me a little time to like them together, but by episode 35 I could feel the mutual attraction. I remember the moment of them singing/playing piano together. I knew they’d be endgame. My main complaint is that when these two are a part they are SUPER ANNOYING! Like they (specifically I’m thinking of Leon) say rude things about the other person and I’m like how could you be okay to get back together? Their best moments are definitely in season 2, whether singing to the other person or imagining singing to them. Definitely at the end of the season when they’re in Spain. I still have to watch the end of their love story, so I hope it’s satisfying.

16. High School Musical the Musical the Series: Nini and Ricky 

So I added this ship onto my list long before I knew about any real-life/personal drama that was happening among the cast. I considered taking it off the list, but as I am discussing the fictional characters I decided to leave it. High School Musical the Musical the Series was a very early 2020 watch. I liked the show more than I was expecting and was upset to hear that season 2 wouldn’t include a performance of High School Musical 2. (I mean, Beauty and the Beast...really?) This was one of those extremely rare times where I actually liked a ship that was the main ship. Usually, I favor the other part of the love triangle or the underappreciated part. I was both shocked and happy when Ricky and Nini kissed in the finale and got together. Of course the final episode ended with some hurtles for season 2 (which now I guess there will be even more), but it was good to see them together and happy. 

15. Legacies: Hope and Josie

With all of these shows ending earlier than they should have due to COVID, I feel like I’m going to sound like a broken record when I say I don’t remember a lot of what happened in this last season. (I guess for 2021 I’ll have to take more thorough notes, but then again you can see which ships I like more.) With Hope and Josie, season 2 was a bit of a rough road. I mean, what do you expect when you erase yourself from existence for the greater good, which means that your boyfriend hooks up with your friend/eventual lover? (Yes, I added in that second part.) Josie and Landon felt very awkward in the beginning of this season when they were in “love” and forgot about Hope. (I rarely heard anyone say they liked them together.) It got more awkward when Hope came back in the picture and had to watch them together. Then we had that spill with Josie being evil (which I was surprised they tackled so early on in the show. Feels like a later plot to explore). Due to all these hurtles, there were less opportunities for my OTP of Legacies. The best moment we got was in the above photo when Hope went into Josie’s subconscious and was speaking to Josie as a fictional pig the whole time. We will never forget how the “pig” suggested Hope kiss her awake. Come on Julie! Give us what we want! 

14. Single Parents: Will and Angie

Will and Angie were far down on my Top Ships last year. Another friends to lovers, you could just feel the chemistry between these two and that was strengthened in season 2. (I just loved some couples more this year I guess.) Last year, they couldn’t really act on too much romance between these two because of Poppy and Douglas’ relationship, but as those two had some drama this season, Will and Angie had a greater chance of getting together. We watched moments where the two pretended to be a couple (for the sake of Will’s parents) and eventually Will came to the realization of his feelings for Angie. In a classic season 2 plot device of a sitcom, Angie decided to go with her real-life husband/Graham’s dad at the end of the season. But you could see she also had feelings for Will and they HAVE to act on those next season. I can’t remember if the show got a third season, and I will be crushed if they didn’t. Previously, they’ve been mid-season starts so I feel hopeful.  

13. Emma: Emma and Knightley

The last movie I watched in movie theaters was Emma. While it makes me sad that I haven’t been able to go back since, this film was a great one to hold this memory. As an avid Jane Austen fan (and period drama as you will continue to notice), I LOVED this Emma and Knightley pairing. This couple is one of my favorites of the Austen heroines and heroes and I have many favorite reincarnations from Romola Garai and Johnny Lee Miller to Joanna Sotomura and Brent Bailey in Emma Approved (still so sad those two broke up). So it was very hard to live up to what I’ve watched and liked before. Anya Taylor-Joy and Johnny Flynn did not disappoint and will be one of the combos I think of when I re-visit the novel. I love how we didn’t focus on their crazy age difference and really highlighted on their relationship as family friends and going back a long time. I specifically like the decision to bring in some early nods to Knightley admitting his feelings for Emma and then not doing so because of the presence of Frank Churchill. Just talking about all of this makes me want to re-watch the movie all over again. :) **If you’re a fan of this combo or Emma/Knightley in general that you have to watch this video. It is amazing! 

12. Avatar The Last Airbender: Zuko and Katara

Another binge from 2020. I watched Avatar the Last Airbender in the summer and was amazed by the story-telling and how deep they could get for a kid’s program. Despite, being in MS/HS when the show originally aired, I hadn’t watched it before. So many people had told me to do and then with the help of Netflix, I felt the pull to do so during quarantine. When I headed into the show, I thought Zuko and Katara eventually got together. Mainly, because I know the fandom and love for them is so strong. I instantly felt this too. There were so many great parallels between there characters. (I mean clearly we have the whole water and fire dynamic.) Even when these two weren’t in scenes together I was thinking about how well they’d work together. So needless to say I was disappointed when they didn’t get to be endgame. We did a lot of great moments at the end of season two and definitely with season three. The Last Agni Kai scene will forever give me chills and represent how deep Zutara is. The evidence is all right there. Such a great ship. 

11. Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist: Zoey and Max

Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist was one of my favorite watches of 2020 and such a feel good show for a moment with a lot of uncertainty. (I highly recommend if you haven’t watched it. Season 2 just started on NBC this week.) For a while I felt very on the fence if I shipped Zoey more with Simon or Max. As you can notice friends to lovers has been a common thread with my posts (although I LOVE a good enemies to lovers) and Max was that 100%. Plus, he’s played by Skylar Astin so what’s not to love. Despite, all of that I felt both of the men in Zoey’s life had potential and I could be happy if she ended up with either one. By episode 6 I was leaning towards Max (if I’m remembering correctly this would be the “When I Wake Up” number with the scooter) and then by episode 8 I was all in! I mean she sang “I’m Yours” to him. (Episode 8 was one of my favorites for the whole season. She did a fantastic job singing and I loved the twist of events. Also, Max being there for her was adorable. The “Pressure” song in the conference room OMG, get me a Max!) The only thing that upset me about their relationship and Max’s character was how sudden his emotions were. It became all or nothing and it felt like too much. He shouldn’t have given Zoey an ultimatum like that. Once he went to work upstairs, I grew to not like this character. Luckily by the last episode I saw some of the old Max again. We’ll see what happens with this new season. 

10. Julie and the Phantoms: Julie and Luke

Julie and the Phantoms: I cannot talk highly enough of this show. It is amazing and everyone needs to be watching it. Of course, it was created by Kenny Ortega so need I say more...but there is so much more to appreciate too. The actors are fantastic and I love the characters they portray! I also can’t stop listening to the music. But this moment is for Julie and Luke, sorry, I should stop promoting the show :) It was very obvious that two members of the band should fall in love and with Julie and Luke both writing their own music and being passionate about their craft it became a no-brainer that they should end up catching feelings for one another. Of course, there’s the major hurtle that he’s a ghost, but we can figure that out in season 2. Luke is obviously the better pick for Julie (Nick who?). They are just so adorable together and I can’t get over that moment when he talks to her at school by her locker and she pretends to talk on her phone. The way they look at each other says it all. (Such great acting!) Then there’s Edge of Great and Luke’s guitar solo. OH! They’re so meant for each other. While no season 2 announcement has been realized yet, there’s no way this show does not get renewed. 

9. The 100: Murphy and Emori

Okay, so I know this sounds hypocritical that I said I won’t think the last season of the 100 exists and here are Murphy and Emori. But in my defense they are the best part of this season and my love for them as a couple really came to a head this season. Murphy had so much character growth and I was fearing for his life almost every episode. Same went for Emori especially after her accident I didn’t feel positive. These two (along with Raven) were the shining beacon in a very disappointing and confusing season. I love how close they are and how strong they make each other. They have been through so much and it was nice to see them so happy (despite everything going on). You just knew they’d always have each other’s backs no matter what. 

8. Violetta: Fran and Diego

I feel like I would do anything for this ship and I have so many more episodes of season 3 to go. (So that’s saying something.) Another Violetta ship, but arguably the best and one that I know is endgame because I grew so obsessed that I started searching for spoilers early on. (That’s how you know it’s bad. Especially when you’re watching YouTube videos without subtitles, so you have no idea what they’re saying, but they look happy and therefore you are happy.) Fran and Diego only got together in the third and finale season of Violetta. Previously, they were a part of different romances (Diego a major one with Violetta), but at the start of this season they are put together in a lot of situations and quickly grow a strong relationship. You can feel the chemistry instantly! They just fit each other so well. Their singing voices together-OMG! While it took FOREVER for their relationship to be public knowledge, I really haven’t had any other problems with them together. (And with 80 episodes it could easily be the case.) A positive of having more than 30 episodes to go: I have more opportunity to fall even more in love with these two. 

7. Sanditon: Esther and Babington

I LOVE THESE TWO SO MUCH! I watched Sanditon so long ago that my memory could get fuzzy, but one thing that stands out clearly is how great it was watching Esther and Babington get together. When thinking about this show people will probably immediately think of Sidney and Charlotte and while they are great and the central couple of the series, these two have my heart. Esther has SO MUCH character growth and development and Babington is a big influence on that. He helps her to see that she can be so much more than what she currently is doing and gets her away from her brother and that lifestyle. For a bit it was touch and go and I wasn’t sure if the two would be endgame, but luckily they were. It appeared to be a marriage out of friendship/necessity. Babington is fine with loving Esther more and hoping she’ll grow to love him. This quickly changes with a scene where we see the two looking very much in love. While this show only used Jane Austen’s unfinished novel as a stepping stone and became a lot more modern (than most fans liked), I thought it did a nice job with several aspects. The main one being Esther’s character. It is a show that I will definitely be re-watching and will always be upset that it did not get a second season. 

6. Legends of Tomorrow: Ava and Sara

A great ship since Ava was introduced. These two balance each other out so well and are one of the most constant ships on the show. (As the Waverider’s doors continue to be revolving in recent seasons.) Each season we watch their relationship deepen and I truly felt that with this most recent season of Legends. Now this might sound super ironic, because from what I can remember (remember 2020 brain, it’s been a while since watching), Sara was off the Waverider a lot, leaving Ava in charge. Sara was away for so many episodes that I started to question (and do a lot of Google searching) if she was leaving the show. Despite the two being a part, I feel we got to know Ava’s character more. She has definitely grown since we first met her all those seasons ago. Due to this development, I felt this couple deserved this spot on the list. When we got to the end of last season ***SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS*** and it looked like Sara (and actually all the Legends) might die, my heart broke for them. Ava and Sara deserve the world. And with the way the finale ended it’s going to be some time till they get it. Once again, Legends is the best CW Superhero show (I said it) and everyone should be watching it.

5. The Spanish Princess: Mary Tudor and Charlie Brandon 

This ship is so underappreciated and deserves to be talked about more!!! (Another common thread in many of these entries.) I have searched for Tumblr posts and YouTube videos and have only found a few dedicated to this couple. There needs to be more!! As the second season of the Spanish Princess dragged for me a bit, once Mary Tudor and Charlie Brandon got more screen time and a plot-line I was instantly sucked in. They nicely balanced the falling out of love of Katherine and Harry. There should have been more scenes with Mary and Charlie. Right away, you could feel some sort of chemistry, but Mary had to be married to the King of France. Then the King dies and she’s promised to pick a marriage of love for her second marriage. Knowing her brother and expecting that she will be married off again she marries the messenger come to get her from France, Charlie Brandon. Super intrigued by their story I looked up the history of the real Mary and Charlie Brandon and their story matches very closely. They got married despite the King’s rules and had many children together. It seems to be a marriage of love like she wanted. This couple will forever be one of my favorites. 

They are also one of my major reasons for wanting to watch the Tudors. While they completely change the Mary and Charles romance (Firstly by naming her Margaret), at least it was very easy to watch. As Charles Brandon is played by the beautiful Henry Cavill. 

4. The Outpost: Talon and Garret

Speaking of underappreciated ships (and TV shows), I present Talon and Garret from CW’s The Outpost. It was SO HARD for me to find a picture from the third (and latest season) of them to put with this post. It’s even hard to watch any scenes of the show on YouTube. Talon and Garret FINALLY got together this season and it was ABOUT TIME! Since season 1 you have felt the tension between these two, but there were always obstacles and people in between them. There seemed to be potential in the first season and by the start of third I was not holding out hope anymore that they would be together. So, it was such a joyous occasion when they became endgame (is that too soon to say? I have no idea if there’s another season on the horizon). This couple solidified my love for a WARRIOR romance. One where, despite being two different genders (and for this show species), both partners are equal in strength and fighting ability. (Well, Talon could take Garret, but they are such a powerful duo!) I now want to read and watch more romances/ships with this trope. [Please let me know if you have any suggestions.] Just talking about them, I can’t help but smile (almost as big as Garret when he saw Talon again before she left for another mission). At the end of the season they might have tried to make it seem like they would pick other partners and I’m so glad they didn’t. You seriously need to watch this show if any of the above sounded appealing/you like high fantasy and maybe a little CGI cheesiest. 

3. The Society: Grizz and Sam

It breaks my heart talking about this ship ever since Netflix released that they were taking back the second season renewal of The Society. I started watching the Society during quarantine (shocking I know), but I do remember a lot from my time watching (more shocking, right?). Hands down the best couple from this show was Grizz and Sam. They weren’t introduced right away and again I might have cheated when I suspected the two might get together, so I looked up some spoilers. (Honestly, that’s the best sign of a ship in my book. If I can’t wait and need to look up spoilers then your show has a good thing going.) Individually Grizz and Sam were my favorite characters and then pairing them together I was dead. So many amazing moments with them. Naturally we didn’t get enough and I will continue to watch fan videos (because there are so many). They are precious and I’m so glad we got some closure at the end of the season because if we didn’t this cancellation would have been even harder. 

2. Nancy Drew: Nancy and Ace

Okay, I’ll try to keep this brief because I know I’ve talked about this couple A LOT on this page in 2020 (but that might be difficult FYI). From an honorable mention thought last year to #2 this year-THAT’S HUGE! But they deserve it, even if they haven’t officially become a couple on the show...well not yet. Early on in the first season I felt a pull between these two characters, which is super ironic seeing as how they had few scenes together and were a part of two different romances. (I mean Nancy had two different love interests.) I thought I was just imagining things (as I do often pair people who barely share plots), but then episode 14 happened and I was sold. Then I came onto Tumblr and discovered the amount of people that felt it too and knew we had something. Shout out to all the other blogs that mention Nace or are made just to honor this amazing duo. I know they will be endgame too and value all your posts that I’m constantly liking and looking for. 

Again, there’s so much I could talk about, but I’ll focus on how much they trust and listen to one another. (I mean Ace drank that stuff because he trusted Nancy!!!) I love how they get paired up on cases and go into investigator mode. They speak SO CLOSE to one another and just all the looks! If we don’t get more moments in the second season I don’t know how I’ll survive. They are just so perfect and I could easily see them become number 1 next year. I cannot wait for the start of season 2 on Jan. 20th!! For now I’ll fast forward through old episodes and watch my favorite moments. Like these:

AND NUMBER ONE.... DRUM ROLL PLEASE...

1. Anne with an E: Anne and Gilbert

Now I know what you’re thinking...’Stephanie, didn’t you pick Shirbert last year too?’ Why, yes that is true. But back then I had only watched seasons 1 and 2 with some spoiler videos of season 3. The release hadn’t come to Netflix yet. Since then, I have watched the last season (and the show as a whole multiple times). It’s just so good and watching the growth of the characters (not only Shirbert) means so much more when you can watch the episodes back to back. But we’re here for Shirbert and how we watched them rise. Yes, it departed from the novel, but I love the twists and turns it took getting to endgame. So many looks and unspoken feelings. I thought it was great how Anne discovered her feelings. I hated Winifred, but understood her purpose. Anne and Gilbert will always be one of my top OTPs no matter which adaptation. Of course, the book will always be the tops, but so many great representations of it have been done on screen. Ultimate enemies to friends to lovers. I hope to one day create characters that could be so strong and beloved.