#she didn't understand why people cared so much and you know what me either bestie

[maria-eve-falcon]

I think she understood his anxieties, you can hear in her songs over the years and I think just from what we know of her as a person... I think she got tired of waiting for him to do something and decide what he wanted in his life... And you can say that him not deciding has to do with his anxieties, but I think she understood him and just waited as long as she could...

sorry I didn't answer early.. I had this answer in my mind but I was(am) to0 tired.

precaution : it's gonna be long and there will be out of this particular topic disclosure because idk why a box inside was opened by this

so.. while I get people when they say she waited too long (bit skeptical) we can't blame anyone (this is making me cry wow parasocial much?) and:

they both of mental issues as we know . god knows what was their position in times. normal people without any issues (almost everyone has issues cause 'perfect' is just not a thing) can't commit easily , famous people with issues having a hard time is really normal. commitment is big. it's not just a piece of paper (imo)

I can't blame joe at all here. cause look at the position he was in. his career kickstarted and he was with her. something very unsimilar with her other exes. so, he doesn't have a career close to the people that debuted with him / close to the time he did i.e liz debici (they won a chopard together ) . he doesn't have enough press (lmfao billy lynn had the record for most press(if not collectively) with him until recently ), nominations and stability what so far judging that he is a decent actor (you can disagree for sure but he IS a decent actor objectively (even when miscast) )

I understand he doesn't want fame and hoards of money doesn't mean he doesn't want a stable career ( while tay's is 740 million a year! that's a load even after paying for everyone and everything! (idk why I pointed this out) )(acting is not a stable career choice it self but I bet he wants to have some kind of stability before at least marriage) AND he has to calculate his every word and action since the beginning .

this is gonna sound mean but do you think tay's position screams suitable for marriage and babies? I'm sorry but she is the position (was before the tour too!) where she literally is on top of the world ! ( yeah I wrote this after the people's article so I'm angry) to get married now and gain a load of attention FOR IT, is sure to be overwhelming for an actor like joe who grew up pretty normal. posh , but normal. I'm sorry but she hasn't step down at all! (not her fault but.. not his either)

considering everything I just pointed out lame excuses (this is gonna get ugly so buck up) what about her picking fights? (when you are in love, you fight but don't pick them?! ) for example afterglow, false god. she even said she knows it's her fault but wants HIM to apologize first. (i'm a person who used to always apologize first and boy, at a point you don't care and distance yourself from those who keep making ya do that (that's how my rtl with my 8 year long bestie ended, fucking exhausting I tell ya) ) ALSO when SHE broke HIS heart first! sorry but my man is human!

ok , fuck all I said . even judging by ylm , I'm assuming with pressure to work on his career or not he couldn't read her mind cause surprise! he is human! they just needed to talk about where they were or what she actually wanted but clearly she didn't understand that.

also about letting go. do you really think a woman who is still writing songs about jm (something that happened 13 years ago) AND INDICATING ENOUGH THAT IT'S ABOUT HIM KNOWING WHAT HER FANS ARE LIKE , going as far to dress up like she was in the vma's literally a decade ago and announcing her new album on the bday of some guy's ex wife (who every one is done dragging for the last 3 years) on mtv music awards is letting go? that thing icked me soo hard . what is growing up is confusing to me since midnights announce. she needs to stop these little clues to diss people that are perfectly fine with their lives and don't care at all! it just shows she loves dragging things and can't let go or be cool about it after soo many years!(nothing else!) and worst part is she makes it obvious that it's about them. now it has come to the point where it is just a stupid topic for everyone to make fun of. her pain surrounding jm and kanye has been dragged for soo long by none other than her and her fans that either people just roll their eyes and move on or it's just a joke atp!!!!!!!!!!!!

tl;dr : I just made 7 points of why joe might have not proposed to her and was stressing about doing so.

[godsfavdarling]

i am back in my reading era and i know that probably none of you care but i want to write down my thoughts on stuff i read in a previous month <3 i'll probably forget to keep up with this either way!

in march i started acotar, it was okay, a bit meh tbh. and looking back the first book seems more like a first chapter to the whole story.

acomaf was better and acowar just pissed me off and i kind of can't wait to read about nesta in the next books. i like her and i don't get the hate she's getting! she's so real! rhys… yeah… i'm giggling and kicking my feet but also ??? mf invented feminism and idk how he is treated like this incredible ruler while his court is divided in three and it's all a mess. i'm not gonna get into political side cuz obviously no one cares!

overall i just wanted to say that i get why people like this series but i do not understand how many people especially grown women can say it's the best thing they've ever read? doesn't make sense to me but go off! plus im happy my friend and i read it together so i have someone to complain to. if i didn't have someone to vent to i'd lose my mind.

me and my bestie also read bride by ali hazelwood… bitch… it was the worst thing i've ever read. so lazy and stupid and annoying! i hated everything and everyone in it! again i refuse to believe y'all love her books! i'm being constantly lied to by the booktok girls and goodreads reviews!

on a bright side i also read my husband by moud ventura! 5/5! really good! i'm a simple girl! i just love a book about a mentally ill woman!

this one is embarrassing but i also finished unfurl by elodie heart. it was just porn. with priest kink. don't ask. it is what it's supposed to be and i liked it! catholicism, sex club, virginity and all that jazz! so real!

that's it. now im reading happy place by emily henry (i like it a lot so far) and one dark window (so good! hope it won't disappoint cuz i thought i didn't like fantasy very much but turns out i'm a fantasy girl and i just want something actually good after acotar…)

[lumaxramblings]

wanted to join in with the elumax ask game woooo - 1, 2, 8, 9, 18, 20 (most likely sending in some other asks too, i need to escape reality for a while lmfao)

1. Preference: Does the trio get together all at once, or do two people start dating first and then confess to the third?

lumax definitely start dating first and then max gets a crush on el but she doesn't talk to lucas about it bc, yknow, 80s, and then when she falls into her coma, lucas and el start getting closer and closer and they realize they like each other, but they wait until max wakes up to decide what to do. el's the one to propose the idea of them all dating, and then they decide "fuck it, we've seen weirder stuff than 3 people dating" and just Do it.

2. Who organises the best date nights? Who puts the most effort into said date nights even when things go wrong? Who shows up in sweats and graphic tees but always knows exactly what to say or do?

i'm torn between lucas and el, but i'm going to say el. she doesn't like bring them out to restaurants but she sort of specializes the dates to cater to their tastes specifically, either individually or apart. like going to the skate park and learning how to skate or going hiking in the forest, stuff like that. and lucas has been assured he doesn't Have to look fancy so he just shows up in like. a hoodie or smt and they're all cool w it cause they're all wearing the same thing

8. AU or Canonverse?

i don't understand this question so imma skip shsjhshs sorry

9. Happy Ending or Angst for the crew?

HAPPY ENDING. max ends up blind but they don't care and keep going on date nights, they can't lose this or i will lose it.

18. How does their confession go? Is it romantic? Funny? Sad?

lucas's and el's confessions was romantic and max's was sad because she's my favourite. it was cute, but she also admitted that she'd never been loved so much, never felt so loved, as when she's with the two of them and also admits that it's a pretty low bar to jump in the first place. lucas and el both confessed after max woke up though :)

20. What got you into Elumax/Lumax/Elmax/Hopclair?

Lumax: i instantly fell in love with max the moment she came on screen and their interactions were so cute and i was instantly sold, but after deeply psychoanalyzing max i realized just how good lucas is to her and for her and vice versa, so i really just adore it <3

Elmax: i have to admit, i didn't really get requited elmax vibes in st3, unlike most people seemed to think (though it's growing on me!!!), but the elmax interactions were way too fruity to pass over my head, and my brain just rang the alarms

Elumax: same as the above, really. i saw how they interacted and just fell in love with the dynamics. after all, you can't go wrong with two golden retrievers and their angry red chihuahua

Hopclair: idk whether i like them more as besties or as lovers, but either way i do know i completely adore them and i get why people ship them :D one-sided-rival to tentative friends to best friends to lovers baby!

[flightfoot]

Okay. I've been burying this for a while, mainly because I didn't have a place to vent, but I feel I can trust you to try and understand.

I can't be the only one with negative feelings towards Alya right? At first I loved her, she was supportive, caring and more than willing to show some sass to protect her bestie. Then the reveal happened and my opinion of her took a nose dive. I wasn't really thrilled with gang of secrets, I thought they were a bit pushy, but they were worried and I can accept that. Plus with no real clue how time passes in the show it may have been weeks after the break up with Luka and she was still withdrawn so I get why that would be more worrying then it being the next day.

No the real problem was the start of pigeon man 72 and Rocketear. One of her first lines in that episode was "I'm your best friend and a journalist, you weren't going to be able to keep a secret from me." What? It's been months! Six if you believe the movies. So that was an eye roll. Then we hit Rocketear where Alya confesses the whole thing with Rena Furtive to Nino. One week. Couldn't keep it a secret for one week. Worse she didn't even tell Marinette that she told him! I mean it's a good thing she did otherwise she would have been dust in Strike back, and I don't get why Ladybug never told Nino about the whole "she can't wear a miraculous anymore" but that's another thing.

Then I remembered the end of Animan. The girl goes from calling Nino her brother to telling him about Marinette's crush on Adrien. And still doesn't tell Marinette that she did! By the time Puppeteer 2 comes around Alya is still elbowing Nino everytime he goes to far while telling Marinette she's imagining things. Either Nino's a genius and figured it out himself or Alya's lying.

This is way longer then I meant for it to be, sorry, so I won't get into the whole Lila bit or every other little thing I noticed but I am not a fan anymore.

I definitely don't share your negative feelings towards Alya - I literally run an Alya Appreciation blog - but this is at least based on actual things that happened in the show, so I'll try to address them.

I really loved Alya and the girls in Gang of Secrets. Marinette was clearly not okay, she was crying in the bathroom stall and when she came out, pretended to be happy and okay, but it was obviously an act. And she wasn't talking to anyone about it, either. Her friends all trying to talk to her, and just wanting to know that they're there for her, that she needs to open up to someone. Marinette DID need an intervention, she wasn't coping well, and she wasn't opening up on her own. Her friends just wanted her to be okay, and given how interventionist everyone in the show is (VERY MUCH INCLUDING MARINETTE,) that involved going to try to talk to Marinette directly. In any case, I love how at the end of the episode, Alya gently told her she could talk to her if she needed it, and Marinette opened up.

One of her first lines in that episode was "I'm your best friend and a journalist, you weren't going to be able to keep a secret from me."

Is this in the French version or something? Because it wasn't in the English version for either Mr. Pigeon 72 or Rocketear.

As for Alya telling Nino that she's Rena Furtive, I actually liked that a lot. Yeah, she didn't keep it secret very long, but I'm kind of glad she didn't? Her relationship with Marinette isn't the only relationship that matters to her, or is treated as valuable by the show. And Alya was stuck between a rock and a hard place. The more people know a secret, the easier it is for it to get out... but the fewer people know it, the easier it is for misunderstandings to happen, and for the person keeping those secrets to have a breakdown. And this secret IS, first and foremost, ALYA's secret. It's about her secret identity, and she's the main one in danger if it gets out - well, her and her loved ones, as we saw in Sentibubbler.

It's not like Alya told her secret "just because", anyway. It'd helped cause the misunderstanding that led to Nino being akumatized, and yeah, while he said that he'd trust in her more after that, it still would've continued to damage their relationship if she had to keep hidden that she was still helping Ladybug.

Alya telling Nino also served to contrast her approach with Marinette's that season, with how Marinette was keeping everything secret from her own partner, Chat Noir, and the extremely detrimental effects that had on their relationship. Alya's approach was meant to be a contrast to Marinette's own, to show another path - and not necessarily a worse one, either.

As for Animan, Nino and Alya had apparently opened up to each other a lot during that stay in the zoo cage. I mean, Nino talked about being coached by Adrien. So I'm not surprised that Alya also opened up about Marinette having a crush on someone - though I'm getting the sense from the conversation that Alya might not have outright said who, but it was just easy to guess from the context - if only to try to work out what, exactly, happened.

In any case, all of this revolves around Alya's relationship with Marinette, and the assumption that she should prioritize Marinette's feelings, wishes, and not ever pushing Marinette to do anything to change a situation, even for the sake of Marinette's own happiness, and I just... can't get behind that. Alya likes and values Marinette, she's friends with her and wants her to be happy, but Marinette is not the only person who matters in her life, and nor should she be. And also just... these kids are interventionist. Which means that when Alya sees that her friends, like Marinette, are having problems, she tries to do something to help fix it. Which might not be perfect, but just leaving the situation to fester usually doesn't help things, either. And Marinette WILL leave a situation to fester, unless something forces her to see that what she's doing is untenable.

Just... I like to go at it from the mindset of "okay, picture this from Alya's perspective. Make her the main character, and Marinette be defined more as being HER best friend, rather than the other way around. How does that change things?" Because a lot of these things are the kind of stuff that's more accepted for a character, so long as they're the main protagonist, the one the story revolves around and that the audience is supposed to project onto. And logically, in-universe, there's no reason why Marinette should be given any more deference than Alya should - not outside of stuff related to being Ladybug, anyway.

I've been in this fandom since early season 3, and been reading a crapton of Miraculous fanfics since then as well. I've seen Alya made to beat Marinette up, destroy her stuff, and lead the class in terrorizing Marinette in order to give Marinette an excuse to call down whatever new friends she makes on Alya and co., having her celebrity friends publicly shame her, get her blacklisted from all future jobs, or even throw her in prison, if it's one of those "Alya assaults or poisons Marinette" fics. Even milder ones would have Alya, and the class in general, realize that apparently everything good that ever happened to them was because Marinette broke her back providing the school with all of its funding, setting up every fun field trip, and making gifts for everyone constantly with no recompense, and then ruing the day they crossed her and lost everything good in their lives, since Marinette was solely responsible for their well-being and happiness. I've seen Alya screamed at and have the things she values torn away by the people she respected the most, time and time again, on a popular and regular basis, FOR YEARS by her insanely prevalent and loud hatedom.

Any sort of thing that Alya could possibly be called out or demonized for, she has been, over and over and OVER again. There is nothing she could possibly do in the show that would in any way justify even a fraction of what has been done to her by the saltdom. I am gonna defend her whenever possible, because someone needs to.

[starkstruck27]

Tag game: Stranger Things Edition!!

I was tagged by my bestie @oopsiedaisiesbaby. Love you!!💚💚

1. Ride or die ship (your otp): Harringrove

2. Most annoying ship: Mileven

3. Second favorite ship: probably mungrove (bonus points if I get the best of both worlds and it ends up as harringroveson)

4. Favorite platonic relationship: Either stobin or elmax. They're both amazing <3

5. Underrated ship: gonna go with elmax again for this one. Or Keg Boys. I feel like they don't get as much love as they deserve.

6. Overrated ship: normally I would say steddie, but I also love them, too, so I'm gonna say ronance. I can see it, but at the same time... meh?

7. One thing I would change in canon: a lot of the random, unneeded deaths. Bob, Billy, Alexei, Benny, Barb, Chrissy? I feel like none of those needed to happen for the plot to move along, and even if they did, like they didn't have to make them like an "Oh well, they're dead :/" thing. Like, they didn't deserve that. And even if they didn't do that, the way the other characters reacted to the deaths was kinda shallow, too. Like Nancy losing Barb would broken my heart a lot more if they didn't use her mourning as a plot device to make her lose Steve and hook up with Jonathan.

8. Something canon did right: the character dynamics. The way they had the kids fighting over petty shit while bad things were happening, how Dustin didn't have a dad so he latched onto Steve as an older brother type positive influence, the way Hopper had to get used to being a dad again and ask Joyce for help? All of that was just beautifully done.

9. A thing I'm proud of creating for the Fandom PLEASE BRAG ABOUT YOURSELF I WANT TO SEE/READ YOUR ART: All of my works on Ao3, but probably my favorite (at the moment) is my fic So Give Him Inches and Feed Him Well or my six fic series Cool To Hate.

10. A character who is perfect to me (wouldn't change a thing): Max, Lucas, Dustin and Will. They're all so sweet and funny and I love them.

11. The character I relate to the most and why: normally I would say Billy, but lately it's been more Max. She's stuck in a house with a jerk of an older brother who goes off like a volcano over the littlest things, though most of the time he's dormant unless he wants to annoy her, and she has to witness him and the only father figure she has fighting all the time. Getting into screaming matches, sometimes getting physical, and while in my situation it's more the son causing problems for the father, it's still bad. The only reprieve I get is when I'm out with my friends, and even though I still care about both of them, I'm starting to lose that love for one of them (in her case Neil, in my case my brother) because of how they treat everyone else and acts like everything is normal afterwards.

12. The character I hate the most and why: Karen Fucking Wheeler. How she can go from being a concerned, doting mother in season one to pretty much a sexual predator in the span of a few seasons, I'll never know. I could understand if she cheated on Ted and went after someone her own age, but the fact that she went after a boy no older than her daughter just makes me sick. And yes, Billy flirted with her, too, but come on. He's a misguided 17-18 year old abused kid looking for any kind of affection wherever he can get it. And Karen is the adult. She should fucking know better.

13. Something I've learned from the fandom: How to politely disagree with people and kill them with kindness. That's why I have an anti's ask pinned to the top of my blog, because I want people to know that I don't care who or what they like, so I'll respect them, but if they come onto my blog actively trying to start shit, I will not fucking stand for it :)

14. Three tags I seek out on Ao3: hurt/comfort, Fluff and Angst, and enemies to lovers.

15. A song I strongly associate with my otp/favorite characters: I made a whole playlist dedicated to Billy, so.... but if I had to pick -

For harringrove: In The Woods Somewhere by Hozier or Don't You Dare (Make Me Fall In Love With You) by Kaden MacKay

For Billy: Far Too Young To Die by Panic! At The Disco, Beautiful Girls by Van Halen, Bella by the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and Cherry Pie by Warrant. Also pretty much Guns N Roses' entire discography.

So, everyone I usually tag for these has already done it (I think), but on the off chance you didn't, I'll tag @thissortofsorcery and @half-oz-eddie , as well as anyone else who wants to participate!

[mehqgossipgirl]

eblast #2.

SPOTTED: The return of a true Upper East Side Titan, and the beginning of an unexpected romance.

I, for one, gave up hope long ago that Kami Kaplan would return to the states. I can only assumed her move back to the city was brought on by the arrival of yours truly, of course. Our once favorite Firestarter has exchanged her matches for political allies, truly turning a new leaf. You all saw the Instagram post -- Nalin Renaud and Kami Kaplan are in a relationship. Maybe it's love, maybe it's a large paycheck; Either way, Kami must have turned a new leaf to gain the trust of the Renaud family -- They don't give their Cash Cow to just anyone.

Not everyone has been bit by the relationship bug -- While he may have been seen leaving with Brie Barlow after the Kiss on the Lips party, my sources confirm that Gabe Miller was seen looking particularly disheveled leaving a dive bar bathroom with a random. I've always preferred members only clubs -- But I suppose that isn't quite everyone's scene. Spotted in the same evening was none other than Colette Arsine, as beautiful and blaise as ever. It seems she's wasted no time after her return from the Maldives, seen with Gabe Miller, Brie Barlow, and Nova Watson all within the same week. Getting your drama directly from the source does have it's benefits. She's got a bit of catching up to do, after all.

Speaking of directly going to the source, I received a tip from a certain Q Magazine receptionist that Elliott Jonsson was seen arriving at the office after hours. Something tells me this was all pleasure, not business. Careful, Brie -- You of all people know Elliott will happily make a run for it wherever you're involved. He didn't go far, though -- He was spotted in the midst of something of a power struggle with Gabe Miller while at brunch at the Aubrey. Noticeably, sans a certain blonde. My sources say the tension was palpable between the two, but I don't understand why -- They have so much in common these days! Social circles, stomping grounds, who they take to bed.

However, the two pale in comparison to the stand off seen at La Bernardin between Indiya Du Pont and Brie Barlow. I've missed the team up's between these two, but I think I like to watch them fight even more. One nosy patron let me know the two were feuding over yours truly, spilling a few secrets before their bestie even knew. It's always such a shame to see two Queen Bees in a cold war, but I certainly love being the cause of it. Want more to discuss, ladies? Indiya was seen with Nova Watson, notable Outsider and Ex of Gabe Miller, hoping to get the two to rekindle their love. Something tells me this will end as well as Stevie Nicks and Mick Fleetwood.

Vienna Miller, ever elusive and calculated, was seen arriving at the Plaza hotel this last week -- Acting as if she owns the place, of course. While most wouldn't bat an eye to see the brunette among the sea of hotel guests, I heard something quite interesting: Elliott has been staying at the Plaza, ever since he touched down at JFK. An interesting coincidence, no? These two just can't stop these secret rendezvous. I wonder what Brie has to say about that.

You know you love me.

XOXO, Gossip Girl.

[logicalstansadvice]

If he started dating either of them, all the fangirls who had goodwill towards them and shipped them will switch up, and they will suddenly start caring about Daisy's age, Lily's scandalous past entanglements, etc. // Go to the head of the class. This is EXACTLY it. They will absolutely trash whoever he gets with, with whatever trifling excuses they can find (omg, now he's being shackled with jewelry?! The horror!) and claim he's just overcome with grief that he's chained (with an actual gold chain?!) to The Contract. They've always done it, which is why the recent rebranding of Margo as "the one who got away" is hilarious because they couldn't stand that girl either.

The claim now that Seb just needs to find a girl "who loves him for who he really is" is disingenuous at best, and very y/n and Reader!Insert! as far as I see it. It's giving "pick me, choose me, love me!"

A grip needs to be got, for crying out loud.

Anon 2: Their latest comment says the real gf jumped ship already / because of the rings, they said 🤣 while he 1) had the ring since August, you can see it on Podcrushed video and 2) it's not matching with AW's old Cartier ring anyway. Oh, and their comments on Drew were an instant giveaway as well - at no point him and AW had a romantic rs, he's gay and they've been besties for 10+ years.

Anon 3: "What struck me recently is that some of these people sound like the stereotype mother ... They claim not to baby him but don’t trust his judgement or respect his choices." Except isn't babying usually less sinister toward the "baby"? A lot of these people are just horrific talking about Seb too. We need some new words because the psychology of this situation has evolved into next-level weirdness IMO.

Anon 4: I like the anons asking questions on here! Everything they’ve said is 100% true and it also applies to the recent whack ass Chris and Alba thing. She’d be a pretty safe option for the fangirls. Usually younger, not like super model giant person almost unknown. and yet… they hate her, and she is fake and just not good. 🤣 Its so funny but also kind of sad. One terrible thing about social media is this shift in parasocial interactions.

Anon 5: Ngl I really can't understand why some people are so invested in his private life. They say they don't like Annabelle (now it's Annabelle, tomorrow who knows) and then proceed to watch her every move. I bet many of them -like me- didn't even know her before her rs with Seb, and I feel like they don't realize they cross a certain line: one thing is not liking someone, another one is hating/talking shit/making fun of and making up theories just to convince themselves that it's all pr. Also, they subtly blame Seb bc his previous relationships didn't work and psychoanalyze him def way too much. This narrative is really sickening. Idk, I wish I had all that free time they have.

💄

[crescendeyes]

turning 30.

7 July - I went to Terry's wedding in hopes to repay all his kindness and love he has showered me over the past couple of years. I have never been more thankful for someone eventhough I've rejected him for more 20 times in the past 2 years.

Going to Brunei for the first time, not knowing anybody; I was destined to stick by the groom through this very challenging time for him. Why did you ask? Well, his wedding is what we would call "a shotgun wedding" aka unexpected pregnancy.

Context: Terry and Rachel got pregnant after dating for 4 months and decided to be good christian families and marry each other.

The entire wedding was honestly interesting, not only was I pushed in different directions to look for a new bf from his family members but Terry himself teased me by asking me if I wanna find a Bruneian boyfriend. It got pretty exhausting and tiring after awhile, I even yelled at him to stfu for the 5th time.

Low and behold, I met Bryant, omg Bryant. LOL.

Both Bryant and Ryan (the groomsmen) were tasked to "take care of me" during the wedding dinner cause Terry would never be able to anyway. He was far too busy getting high off his tits and drunk to even care bout me - so I understand and oblige.

Bryant was the first dude I really noticed cause, well, he was the only other dude covered in tattoos and he looked somewhat normal compared to the other jarringly Bruneian Chinese people there. But the INFJ in me was strong, I was too shy to say hi or introduce myself. Funny thing is, so was Bryant.

Of course, extroverted Ryan (his bestie) decided to walk up to me and introduce themselves to me (thankgod) cause I wouldn't have done it myself.

TLDR: We ended up getting pretty fucked up and blacked out for most of the wedding. Turns out Bryant and I were pretty close the entire night (we didn't remember a single thing). We spent the night knocked out on my bed cause Bryant had a flat tyre sending me back to my hotel.

But who could blame him? I mean look at me I'm gorgeous LOL. OK, jokes aside, we did end up spending the rest of my days in Brunei together cause Terry ended up in the doghouse with Rachel for the 2 nights after seemingly abandoning her at their own wedding and attempting to kiss me (you cannot make this shit up guys).

Upon leaving the country, I found myself missing Bryant and wishing we had more than a couple of days together....we spoke bout this for 2 nights in a row after I left and he decided to fly down after.

The reason was simple:

My birthday celebration - she turned 30 guys haha

To spend more time and explore what this could potentially be

My birthday wasn't something to shout about. It didn't really matter to me how I celebrated being 30 but it mattered who was there for it. I had an amazing time either way cause Bryant was there. I really think losing Aaron was a manifestation of what Bryant came to be in my life.

Someone who is unexpected, calm, kind and caring. OMG I don't think I have ever been more in love. My heart swells in the happiest manner when I talk to him eventhough it is thru the phone. It was amazing.

Come my actual birthday, I had to fly off to Copenhagen with my family and I was DREADING it. I wish I could back out of this truly. I wish I could just take the 2 weeks I am off to spend it with Bryant anywhere I want. I wish I could just do it.

Bryant said he would be home at mine when I come back cause thats how much he misses me too. And for the love of God, bless this man cause eventhough we are doing LDR it doesn't feel like it.

So, work is shitty but turning 30 brought in an unexpected love I didn't think I would find <3

[catgirlsaturn]

Posting this here because I can and thinking about it makes me go :3

I genuinely love my best friend so much. All my life I never had anyone there for me, and I have many people here for me now. I've had many fake friends who have called themselves my best friends in the past, but then end up leaving me. Friends I could never tell what I was going through because they either didn't care or had bigger, badder, problems than mine, so much so they wouldn't even care to listen to me.

But now, I have my best friend. She's always there for me, and I'm always there for her. She's the sweetest, kindest, person I've ever met, and I'm so happy she's in my life. I used to always think to myself "Why don't I have a best friend? I've never had anyone I can grow with and have shared many memories with." But, now I do. And I'm so glad it's her.

One of the best parts is that we have a lot in common, and she understands what I've been through so specifically, even though I haven't told her a lot about my own trauma, she knows. And she always says the right things, is always there, even when she herself is falling down.

Once you meet a selfless person who is there for you, you should be there for them as well. We are always there to pick eachother up, always there for eachother. This is also a good time to say that I've learned that platonic love is just as important as romantic love, both can hurt, but platonic love is always there for you.

Be a nice person, a good human, eventually you'll meet the most amazing person in your life. No one can replace my best friend, she will always be my forever bestie.

I love her so, so much./p

[tobe-sogolden]

You don’t have to post. That queerbaiting bullshit is something you only see online. Irl people are just trying to live their damn lives and there are so many experiences. The discussions held online are so narrow minded for 2022. Life is not black and white and Stan twitter or other social media places have this need to place people inside of boxes.

I don't mind posting! I totally agree. It's chronically online behavior! And so regressive like 🥴

[thebadboyfanclub]

The Sun And Moon (Pete Davidson x Reader)

Heyyyyyy besties! So I'm back with another white boy of the month. I would like to warn you that this will be mentioning Pete's BPD and the reader will be mentioned as somebody that has had traumatic experiences however i am not mentioning what does that imply so don't worry about it. Other than that I hope you enjoy!

Being with Pete was almost a gift and a curse, you were so different yet so alike. The ultimate example of twinflames, the yin and yang. If someone had to describe what you two were like was that (y/n) was like the sun, a warm personality with kindness and such just overall this untouchable beauty from inside and out, also she adores to be under the sun, Pete sometimes found her as she laid on the floor next to her cat just so she can enjoy the warm rays, sometimes she would have her crystals (Pete called them "magic rocks") which Pete found so adorable, also as the weather got warmer she got happier.

Pete was the moon, a little bit more moody, mysterious, yet alluring, he intrigued anyone that was around him. Unlike (y/n) Pete was a night owl, he liked late night drives, staying up all night just smoking weed and watching movies, he liked the silence that the nightfall brought, he felt more at peace with the idea of relaxing and enjoying the darkness that others feared. Many times (y/n) woke up in the middle of the night and found him on her balcony, just sitting there and enjoying the view.

People around them brought up that comparison so much that they even got it as a couples tattoo, (y/n) got the sun behind her ear and Pete got the moon on his left middle finger cause he found it funny. However the curse was that they had to learn how to be around one another, yes they had similarities but they weren't quite the same situations.

Pete was a comedian, (y/n) was an author, both of them had to sometimes sit their ass down and think of something to write, but the circumstances were different. 

"Baby I'm here"

Pete said as he shut the door of (y/n)'s apartment, dropping his pair of keys on the bowl that she had conveniently placed on a piece of furniture right next to her front door. Pete waited for an answer while taking off his shoes, (y/n) liked structure and she was a very neat person, another thing Pete had to learn, he wasn't dirty but he was a tad bit of messy so when he was at her apartment (which basically had become his also) he was careful with how he did things.

Silence greeted him back, he sucked in his teeth as he realized exactly why this was happening. (Y/n) had mentioned that she was writing the second book of her fantasy novel and she was in a bit of a writer's block, she had so many fresh ideas however when it came to writing them down sometimes her mind just wouldn't co operate and she just couldn't get it down in a way that she found right. He left the take out food on the small coffee table and continued to walk towards her bedroom. 

There she was, slightly laying back on her leather chair with her laptop in front of her, just staring at her screen and occasionally pressing a few buttons. The door was somewhat open so he could take a good look at her, her hair was down, she was wearing some shorts and a t-shirt she had accidentally spilled bleach on so now it was a house shirt and no socks, she hated wearing socks. Pete knocked on the semi closed door to get her attention.

"Oh I didn't hear you come in"

"I figured, what are you doing here babe?"

"Regretting my decision on signing the contract for a second book"

She mumbled when Pete approached her and leaned down to press several kisses on her neck and cheeks. (Y/n) smiled and enjoyed the feeling of comfort he brought her before shaking her head and pulling away from him.

"I need to finish this chapter"

"What you need to do is eat, I'm pretty sure you skipped breakfast"

She knew he was right, that's why she didn't respond so she just kept on staring at her laptop screen, hoping that miraculously an idea will come to her head. She deeply appreciated his concern but she felt the pressure of her publicist that called everyday to ask about the book, today was one of the few days she chose to not pick up the phone. Pete once again was met with silence although that didn't stop him from placing his hands on her shoulders to give her a massage.

"Come on sunshine, you can take a break and clear your head"

"Pete I have to write thousands of pages in a short amount of time, it's not just fucking punchlines"

Pete's face made a sour expression at her jab. It did sting a little bit yet he tried to understand that she was just overwhelmed with the responsibility of delivering on time. He took a deep breath before patting her on the head and turning away from her.

"I'll be in the living room"

For some time she felt relieved that he left so she could refocus, however after a few moments when she started to see her reflection on the screen she started to realize what she had done which was awful. She felt so bad that she had to shut down the screen and close her laptop so she wouldn't look at herself, she spoke in such a disregarding manner that she felt disgusted. With tears already clouding her eyes she got up and found Pete watching TV, the take out in front of him and it didn't take long for her to notice that he had bought her favorite making her feel even worse. She stood in front of the TV and Pete looked in her eyes and smiled.

"I'm sorry"

Her voice breaks in the middle of the sentence. Pete's smiled dropped when he saw a year escaping and heard her whimpering voice, he immediately got up from the couch and went to hug her.

"Its okay sunshine"

"No it's not, I didn't mean it I swear"

"I know baby"

"I'm just so… stressed"

She said and let herself relax in his arms as she wrapped hers around his torso, feeling the warmth of his engulf her. His scent went to her nose making her feel safe in his arms as the tears stained his sweatshirt. Pete started rubbing her back to help her let out her emotions, he knew how emotional (y/n) was and he found it cute how she feels like cry no matter what the situation was, she had happy tears, angry tears, sad tears, she saw a dog tears, attending a wedding tears, he didn't mind it though on the contrary he liked that she was able to express her emotions with no fear.

"I understand baby, it did sting a bit though, you know how much I love my work"

"I know, I wasn't thinking when I said it which is wrong"

They had agreed that they wouldn't do the "it's ok" type of shit, they preferred to actually say when something either hurt them or bothered them so they can have clear boundaries with one another, it was one of the best decisions they could have ever made, it was one of the strongest foundations they had for their relationship. (Y/n) looked at him and Pete immediately went to wipe her tears, before pressing a kiss on her forehead.

"I'm sorry"

"I accept your apology. Are you feeling better now?"

"A little bit. Thank you for forgiving me and I will try to do my best to not repeat that behavior"

She responded, her voice now was more steady and clear.  Setting boundaries between them and being clear about the behavior that is acceptable was something they had established early in the relationship, Pete was diagnosed with BPD and (y/n) had trauma from past experiences so they had agreed to see a couple's therapist in order for them to move on with their relationship in a healthy manner, so things like "it's ok" or "you know I didn't mean it that way" were unacceptable, taking accountability for their actions and having the humility to apologize was their key to success.

Pete's smile reappeared and now gave her a kiss on her lips, making (y/n) get a bit of a shiver down her spine. Their kisses always felt so strong, like energy passing through one to the other, it was such a magical experience to them.

"Are we good?"

"Yes, now take a seat and I'll microwave your food"

"Wow, Gordon Ramsey would be so proud of you"

[atalho-s]

Light Up The Dark

Part 2 | We are accidents waiting to happen

pairing: bartender!tom x famous!reader

warnings: smut +18 miniors dni, swear words?, drinking, let me know if anything else!

words: 5.0 k

a/n: english it’s not my first language, so i’m sorry for any mistake! I don’t have a taglist yet, but if you want to be tagged in the next chapters let me know!! 

PART 2 if you want to read part 1 click here! 

It was already Saturday. The day Y/n took for herself. Writing was extraordinary, but she loved having a day off to take care of herself. She spent the day doing things she enjoyed, whether it was lying in bed watching a movie or trying to cook something.

After the fateful day of writer's block she started writing like crazy, so she didn't feel guilty about taking a day off without thinking about her characters and how they would get out of the challenges she had created for them.

The fateful day. For some reason she kept thinking about that damned Brit with that accent. For a moment she'd been scared that she'd been seen by paparazzi hanging out with the mysterious bartender, or even some picture of him leaving her apartment. But nothing came out in the news on the gossip sites, which made her relieved.

As much as she deserved to have fun once in a while and wasn't doing anything wrong, she still didn't want to bring attention to herself and even less to a guy who wasn't even famous. She was afraid to put anyone who wasn't famous in the media. Fear that one day suddenly, this person might be persecuted because of her.

Anyway, it had just been a crazy night. Nothing much. And she didn't intend to see him again. So she had nothing to worry about.

Sitting down in the kitchen counter with her familiar cup of coffee she got lost in some thoughts. Why hadn't she stopped thinking about him ever since? It had been a great night, but that was all. She didn't even know him well.

Maybe it was because her creative block had been broken after being with him. But obviously it was just a coincidence. She had just felt inspired after a distraction.

She shook his head away from the thoughts and placed the cup in the sink. She took a deep breath and thought about what to do next. But before she could think of anything else her cell phone started ringing on the counter. She was almost jump by the sudden sound, seeing the screen indicating that it was Milla, her agent, who had become one of her best friends.

- Hi Mil! - she said after sliding the screen.

- Good morning baby. - she said on the other end of the line. - Ready for the party?

- Party? What a party? - Y/n asked confused starting to wash the small amount ofdishes she had soiled.

- How you don't know? I thought I sent you the invitation on your email and I even sent you a message!

- Bestie, I haven't seen my email or message for days. I was super focused on the book, my writer's block finally went away.

- Really? I knew that would go away! You were worried for nothing. What did you do to go back to writing? - Milla asked and Y/n smiled a little.

- Well... I just went out to chill out a bit...Nothing much.

- Y/n getting out on weekdays? And even on the days you're writing a book? That's what I call grow. - she said and Y/n rolled her eyes laughing. - I'm even afraid to invite you to parties, because I know when you're writing you hate to go out... But it's good to know that you're getting out of your routine a little...

- Yeah, sometimes it's good to breathe new air. - Y/n replied drying his hands on a towel. - But what party are you talking about?

- A party of none other than Emma Brown. - Y/n snorted. Emma Brown was a great actress who to tell the truth she didn't know much, she only knew her from a couple of her movies, but other than that she didn't know much about her.

But what she did know was that she had some also famous friends of questionable taste. They were those famous people who only knew about money, women, cars and mansions. But she was tipped for a theatrical adaptation of one of her books and she wanted everything to come out perfect. She was very afraid the movie would end up ruining her work.

- Do I really have to go? - She asked in a tearful voice.

- Yes you have! It's going to be a really fancy birthday party for her, all the famous people in the industry are going to be there. You know you have to socialize with these people. Who knows, you can make some important friendships...

- Milla... I don't know... I don't need important friendships. I don't need anyone to stand up or approach others for interest.

- I know you don't need anyone for that... I just meant that you're very isolated, you need to make connections, understand? I know it's hard because you hate all that fame and stuff. But if you want the adaptation of your story to be good, there's no way... Besides, one of the great directors you left me on the list to research will be there too. So it would be really cool to kill two birds with one stone. - Milla said and Y/n sighed. She was right, if she wanted everything to work out she had to at least have a conversation with these people. It would be weird to refuse Emma's invitation to her birthday. It would just show that she was uninterested.

- Okay... You won ok? - She said and Milla gave an excited squeal. - But I won't stay long!

- Okay, okay... Just for you to go is great! Andrew will be there shortly for you to choose a dress. -Andrew was her stylist and she practically jumped every time Y/n had an important event, because it was rare for her to go. Good thing he didn't just have her as a client, because otherwise he'd be bored out of his mind for a long time.

- Okay Mil, thank you... I love you! - She said and Milla said goodbye hanging up the phone.

It was late afternoon when Andrew arrived at her apartment with several suitcases and bags in both hands. He really had brought up thousands of options. But Y/n ended up choosing a slightly shiny black dress that went just above the knee with a V-neck. Something cute, but nothing too fancy.

He did her makeup. Which wasn't too heavy either, as she hated things that were too heavy on her face. Finally she put on a mid-heeled sandal in the same color as the dress and her sparkly earrings. Before Andrew left her apartment satisfied with the result.

It was almost 7:30 pm when a black car that would take her to the party location arrived in front of her building and she got out enter the backseat right after. She was apprehensive. She hated socializing to tell the truth. Large crowds and cameras really made her anxious.

After almost 20 minutes the car stopped in front of what appeared to be a large gate. Several paparazzi showed up and started taking pictures of her car surrounding her or even tapping on the window a little, asking her if she could talk to them. Which she obviously ignored. The driver introduced himself to the doorman and he opened the gate letting the car pass and stop in front of a luxurious mansion.

Some people were coming in and others were standing in front talking. She saw that there were some familiar faces of the media. Actresses, actors, singers, famous people of every imaginable type.

She opened the car door and walked out towards the large entrance. She smiled at a few people, nodding her head as she passed and found herself in a crowd of people as she entered the place. There really were a lot of people, despite the place being even bigger inside. Many with fancy drinks in hand and chatting. A song playing on the background.

She walked deeper into the room and took a quick look around trying to find the birthday girl. After a few minutes she found her near one of the sofas. Y/n walked over and stopped beside her, causing Emma to stop her conversation with two more people and look at her.

- Happy Birthday! - Y/n said in the friendliest way possible and Emma smirked and hugged her lightly afterwards.

- Thank you! Glad you came! - she said, breaking out of the hug after a few seconds.

- Your party is very beautiful, I loved the decoration. - Y/n said looking around. Indeed Emma had decorated the place in a simple way, but at the same time fancy and beautiful.

- Oh thank you... - she said, still smiling. - I'm very happy that you accepted my invitation, we have a lot to talk about since maybe we'll work together, right?

- No problem, obviously I would come... - Y/n said and almost punched herself because she was very fake in saying that. - But we really have to talk!

- Well, I was talking to Jim just now... I can give you his number later... He's a great director and I think it would be great for your adaptation... - Emma said and Y/n thought that she was really interested in that adaptation, because she was even talking to the possible renowned director, which surprised her. She thought Emma was a little more oblivious to her books and even movie stuff. She thought she was one of those famous actresses who expected others to come after her, not being interested in the work itself, but only on the fame and money. - We love your book! I think it has great potential for a grand adaptation.

- Wow, that is good to hear! Thanks a lot! - Y/n said sincerely this time. - I'll love talking to him too...

- Sure! - She looked behind Y/n and motioned to someone from far away. - Hey Jim! You can come here? - She asked speaking loudly for him to hear and Y/n turned around watching the director approaching after saying goodbye to someone. He wasn't much older than she thought, maybe in his early thirties, he wore a small beard that fit his face and short hair, but with curls that jutted out around his head. -That's Y/n... Y/n that's Jim...-Emma said when he got in front of her and Jim held out his hand with a smile.

- Nice to meet Y/n, we finally met... - he said and Y/n shook his hand also smiling.

- Nice to meet you Jim! - She said and Emma sat in one of the armchairs indicating for the two to sit, which they did next.

- Do you two want something to drink? Champagne?- Emma asked and they both accepted as she motioned for someone from far away to bring them.

- Well, I found your book very intriguing Y/n... I can say I haven't slept for a while... - Jim said laughing a little and Y/n smiled. - It's a very well written story, I loved the plots and it has a great resolution. I think I would make a good 2 hour movie with all this material... - he said and Y/n paid attention until something took her a little out of focus. Something not. Somebody.

It was the waiter, and not just any waiter. It was Tom. He came into her vision and she couldn't believe what she was seeing. Maybe it was a mirage or she was mistaking him for someone else. But when he approached she was sure it was him. He came with a tray with drinks in one hand. He was wering a white dress shirt, with black pants. The typical pattern of a fancy party waiter. But he was beautiful. Y/n felt a shiver for a moment and tried to hide it by looking back at Jim who was still talking about his plans for the possible movie.

Maybe Tom didn't even remember her. She was just a one-night stand, he should do that with a lot of girls out there, so it wasn't something new to him. As soon as he arrived, he handed one of the glasses to Emma beside her and Y/n felt her breath quicken a little. She didn't know why she was so nervous. It was just a waiter she had slept with a few days ago.

- Excuse me... - he said and Y/n looked up at him quickly seeing that he was right in front of him. -Here it is miss...-he said looking her in the eyes and then winking at her, wich almost make her shrink in her chair. He held out the tray for her to take one of the glasses and she did, looking away at Jim.

- So, what do you think? - Jim asked taking the glass from the tray and Y/n took a sip of his surprise drink.

- Sorry? - She asked guiltily for having been distracted.

- About us meeting and having a meeting next week? That way I can show you my idea better. - he said and Y/n smiled.

- Of course, that would be great! - she said and Tom walked away not looking in her direction again, which left her disappointed for a second. She would going to love looking into those eyes again.

- Perfect! - Jim replied excitedly and started talking about other things as well as Emma.

They talked for almost an hour, until Emma went to talk to other people and Jim said he was leaving as he had some work in the morning. Y/n sat for a while and finished drinking the last of her champagne and placed it on the table in front of her.

She thought about leaving. She had already done the important interactions for the night. So, she had no reason to stay there. But she kept thinking about the damn waiter. Would it be weird to go talk to him? Maybe just say hi? But she doubted he would want to talk to her. Besides, he was working. She didn't want to get in his way.

Getting up from her chair and straightening her dress, she forced her steps towards the exit, but stopped midway as she saw Tom walking into what appeared to be the kitchen with the tray tucked under his arm. She looked at the exit door and sighed. Okay, if she went to him just to say hi, it wouldn't hurt would it?

Y/n turned and headed in the direction that Tom had gone. She couldn't even believe she was doing it this. She would looked ridiculous in his eyes. But she choose to ignore the little voice of reason again. Passing by a few people, and walking out into a empty hallway, she opening a single door at end. She closed in behind her and turned to see that Tom was on his back piling some boxes in a corner. His muscles in that outfit made her feel tempted somehow, so she swallowed hard. He turned at the sound of the door closing and looked at her with a mixture of confusion and curiosity.

- Looking for something madam? - He asked with a smirk.

- Actually... - Y/n thought of some excuse, maybe it would be better, so it would seem that she was there for something else and not for him. - Yeah... I was looking for the bathroom, I think I take the wrong direction...

- Yeah...Actually, the bathroom is on the other side of the hallway... - he said leaning against the kitchen counter and looking her up and down, making her feel completely vulnerable. After his eyes roamed her legs and bust, they came to her face and he grinned.

- Okay, I'll... - Y/n started saying and turned around taking a few steps. But she stopped midway, closing his eyes, tearing himself apart from the inside out of embarrassment. She turned around again seeing that he was still watching her, now with his arms crossed over his chest, wondering what she would do next. - You remember me don't you? - She asked fearfully.

- Of course I remember darling... - he said, practically intensifying his accent in that nickname that was so perfect in his voice. Y/n took a few steps forward also crossing her arms. - How could I forget the famous writer Y/n?- He raised an eyebrow and she rolled her eyes with his last sentence.

- It really was an...- She looked at her feet trying to find a word. - Interesting night… - she finally said and he chuckled, making her look up.

- Very interesting indeed... - he said putting his hands in his front pockets, pulling himself away from the counter and heading towards her. Y/n wanted to say goodbye and leave, run away as fast as possible. But she couldn't, every move he did was too tempting, so she just stood there watching him get closer and closer to her. He stopped in front of her and looked into her eyes, smiling slightly.

- What are you doing here? Do you work as a waiter at parties too? - Y/n asked curiously.

- My boss sometimes receives proposals for us to work at these rich parties... - he said with a shrug.

- Oh... Nice... - she said crossing her arms. - Well...Now I really have to go... - she said trying to get away from it one last time.

- Why did you really come here love? -Tom asked tilting his head a little to the side and she felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up.

- I told you, I was looking for the bathroom. -Y/n looked at his face trying to be firm, but saw that he still wore that smirk. Why did he have to be so confident like that?

- Oh sure... Just like you also looked for some excuse that day for me to leave, but failed miserably?- he asked making a thoughtful face and she still hadn't decided if she wanted to slap him or kiss him.

- Why did you leave without saying goodbye tho? - She asked ignoring what he had said.

- So that's why you came after me? Are you hurt that I didn't leave you a goodbye kiss? - he said pouting.

- Of course not, I just... I don't know, it would be nice to say that you were leaving and that you wouldn't stay for breakfast... - Y/n said looking to the side, avoiding those brown eyes that intimidated her.

- Darling, I'm not that type guy, sorry...

- What type of guy? - she still avoided looking at him.

- The type who stay for breakfeast. -he said taking a hand from her pocket and taking her chin gently, making her look at him. - But if you want some fun I'm at your disposal. -he said and she bit her lower lip lightly making him deviate his eyes towards her lips. - Do you want darling?- he asked quietly and Y/n seemed to be transfixed by her touch. She was surrendered, she couldn't deny it. Maybe even hypnotized.

- I...- she said with a little shaky voice. - I don't know...

- Yes or no?- he asked looking from her lips to her eyes and she felt her breath getting heavy.

- Yes...- she just spoke as a whisper and he smiled satisfied.

- How about you meet me in 15 minutes in the bathroom of the pool house? - He said and she just shook her head slowly. Tom released her chin and backed away slowly, not taking his eyes off her, and then walked away leaving her alone with her heart racing.

Y/n took a deep breath and tried to place herself in what had just happened. Did she really want this? Her mind could try to hear the voice of reason, but it was drowned out by her body's reaction. She wanted to feel him again.

She walked away quickly, passing several people who were talking loudly or who were already drunk. She looked around and saw the door that led to the back side and sneak there, getting out and feeling the slightly chilly night air, closing the sliding door behind her.

She saw the pool that had some people around it and a little further to the right a door that opened into another closed space. Probably the pool house. She walked over there, trying to hide it so no one would see her, and went inside. She closed the front door slowly and headed towards the bathroom.

The place was dark, with only the lights outside. So she was holding her hand into to some stuff until he found the door. She went in and turned on the light. The bathroom was spacious, with a large sink and a huge mirror in front of it. She closed herself off and looked at herself in the reflection.

That was crazy. She had never done that at parties. Not even when she was drunk. And now she was there, looking forward to what might happen. In fact she knew what was going to happen, just as she knew when she invited him up to her apartment that night. But even so, she felt butterflies in her stomach in anticipation.

After almost 10 minutes of waiting she heard the bathroom door open and she turned in the direction, feeling extremely anxious. Tom came in looking over his shoulder and closed the door soon after, looking at her with an opening grin. He locked the door slowly with one hand and came towards her in a hurry.

The next thing she felt was his lips pressing against hers urgently. He kissed her like it was the last thing he would do. Running her tongue over her lips asking permission and Y/n opened it slowly letting him explore her mouth with his burning tongue.

She ran her hand around the back of his neck pulling his hair and he responded by holding her waist tightly. Tom walked forward and she leaned her back against the sink counter. Making him lift her with agility, sitting her down on the cold surface and getting between her legs. She grunted in surprise against his mouth and he broke the kiss for air. Kissing from her neck to her collarbone and she closed her eyes feeling his touch.

- Tom... - she said in a low voice. - You won't get in trouble if you disappear like that? -he now kissed her neckline and squeezed her thigh with desire.

- Not if we're fast darling. -He spoke a bit husky, moving his kisses to her earlobe, biting lightly and she moaned low. - And despite loving your sounds, you will have to be silent. - He looked at her smiling maliciously. - Promise? -He spoke touching her nose with his lightly, looking at her closely, and she nodded making him attack her lips next.

Still kissing her he pulled the hem of her dress up a little and she bit his lip making him smile against the kiss. Her fingers reached her inner thigh and then moved up to her panties. Tom put the fabric aside with one of her fingers and passed one slowly at her entrance feeling her wetness.

- Always ready for me aren't you darling? -He said pulling his mouth away from hers, staying just a few centimeters away from her. She moaned softly again and he smiled as he pulled her fingers away and replaced them around her thighs pulling her closer to the edge of the sink.  He started to finger her really slowly and she bite her lips, trying to control her moaning. Tom keep his pace just watching her face squirm with pleasure. After seconds he removed his delicious fingers making her almost protest out loud, makind him smile even more. If wasn't for the rush he would definitively make his time with you.

Y/n then put his hands on the collar of his shirt and opened the first buttons. Kissing his neck with desire, making him squeeze her thighs in response. Biting her lips he unfastened his belt and then the buttons of his pants pulled them down along with his boxers, revealing his cock. He pulled her in for one more kiss before taking the condom package from his pocket and opening it, meanwhile Y/n was kissing uncovered place she could reach, from his face to his chest, opening more buttons of his shirt.

Tom adjusted the condom on his cock before taking a few thrusts. He moved even closer to her, if that was even possible, and gave her a peck.

- Ready? He spoke softly against her lips and she nodded almost in despair, wanting to feel him inside her more than anything.

He smiled once more and slid his cock easily as she was completely wet. Tom growled low against her ear and Y/n bit her lip so no sound could come out. He started to move, after she was more adjusted to his size, at first slowly and starting to increase his pace with each second.

-Fuck... - he cursed softly against her ear and she pulled the hair from his neck with one hand, while the other squeezed his shoulder. The more he increased the pace she felt as if she were coming off the ground. - So tight darling... - he said between small grunts. - Feels so good...

- Tom... - Y/n spoke and he increased the pace even more making her moan with the sudden sensation of pleasure and he muffled her sounds by sticking his lips on hers.

-Shh… - he said after moving his lips from hers and Y/n tried her best to keep the sounds to herself, but he filled her perfectly and made her feel so good that she couldn't help it. Tom smirked and put his hand over her mouth, covering her moans. - Can't contain yourself? -he said and kissed her neck giving light bites and hickeys. -You're so easy for me, love... Look at you...- he spoke in a low voice, while still holding his hand firm in her mouth and kissing below her ear. - So easy...- he said going faster, as if it were possible, and bit his lower lip trying to contain his own moans this time, touching his nose to her cheek.

- Please…- she managed to speak muffled against his hand, feeling her orgasm quickly building.

- I know sweetheart... - he said making her feel his heavy breath into her cheek. -I got you ...-he finally said and that was enough for her orgasm to release with force, making him also come right after her with one last muffled grunt against her neck. He continued to move slowly for a few more seconds, before coming to a complete stop. The two of them with their breaths out of control. Reaching their high.

After a few minutes Tom took his hand from her mouth and soon after took his member out of her slowly. The two were silent the entire time. Y/n felt empty as  soonTom walked away to clean up, still half dazed from all the pleasure she just felt. He cleaned himself up and discarded the condom, zipping his pants and turned around, buttoning his shirt right away. Y/n didn't take her eyes off every move he made and he smiled approaching her.

- Want some help darling? - he asked standing in front of her and she held in his arms before he helped her getting down from the sink. She felt a little dizzy and if it wasn't for him holding her she thought she would fall. - You're right? - he asked still holding her on her waist.

- Yes...Thank you... - she managed to say.

- Well, I have to go, before they notice that I'm gone... - he said, releasing her.

- Of course... - Y/n said. - Tom… - she didn't know what to say. It might be the second time they'd done this, but it still felt like it was the first and she felt somewhat embarrassed. Maybe because she wasn't used to casual sex.

- See you soon? - He said giving a quick kiss on her cheek, fixing his hair in the best way he could and winking as he walked away, going to the door and unlocking it. He got out and closed it behind him while she back staring into the mirror.

She took a deep breath and was trying to figure out what to do next. After cleaning her up she finally got out of there. She crawled to the door and managed to get through the party without the weird looks she thought everyone would send to her when they bumped into her. For some reason she thought everyone would know, but obviously not. She felt weird doing that at an party, it really wasn't like her. But why did she feel so good?

She looked around before heading out of the house, but she didn't find Tom in her vision and she didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing. She wanted to look at him one last time from afar, but at the same time she didn't. Maybe that was the last time they were going to do that. She didn't think she'd find him like this anywhere else, and she didn't intend to go to the bar he worked at just to get another night with him. Besides, that's what she was, just one night, just a "quickie" in the bathroom. And everything was fine. He was that for her too, so what did it matter?

For a moment she felt his head fill with ideas. Y/n had a perfect plot for her story now. She had to go home and get back to writing right away. Calling the driver from a distance, she practically ran towards the car.

[shyampyari]

hi so um im just gonna say this

people started a skull emoji thing where they would go i don't like t user so and so

you didn't do it so sorry but i want to say this

i don't like vee, tee, alima, kansha/cunsha whichever it is, jugn00's new blog who something

now people are saying that my reason (they don't answer asks same as anon sent to ravememcoi [not exact url]) isn't valid cause they don't owe me anything and they don't have to reply to asks

but 1. its annoying to send people asks and not have them answered when you know they are receiving them and it's just compliments and also 2. they go around writing all this love poetry and aren't willing to drop a topic that came up ages ago (can't remember url but vee something url started this again for no reason)

now you'll say BUT THEY DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING TO PLEASE YOU WHY DON'T YOU GET IT

but understand that i am not obligated to like or not dislike them either and since you didn't mention it i am not obliged to you to not mention that i dislike your mutuals

also people are saying you need to deactivate your acct cause your personality is bad and just 1. she doesn't need to do anything to please you same as vee, tee, mirrorvid etc 2. press block and stfu

also i don't care much for the people that started this again

they started it knowing that this would happen and if they had just chosen to not answer the anons starting this again it wouldn't have happened and again, their chioce to post abt whatever they want but my choice to not love you

i remember trying to send one of them anons for a while because i wanted to be friends and when she finally replied to my ask she just basically insulted me and started correcting my grammar

it was not a mean or hate anon these people just want excuses to prove they are better than everyone else and if someone get's their hands on this they will for sure start correcting this ask like an english answer script

i am actually glad they started their mutuals only blogs

at least the rest of the world now knows that they shouldn't interact with them or they will be treated badly

DAMN ANON PREACH.

But I actually have more to say lmao fjfnnxn

This has to be the shittiest ask game that has happened in a while and tbh i didn't want to interact with this game for the same reason.

I wouldn't want to post about blogs that i have never interacted with because idk what they are really like to hate on them and if my moots were being attacked, id take that very personally. Because I wouldn't disregard an anon with a valid point even if its against my own moot. There are people we dislike and people we can't stand and what should we do? Walk awayeyaeya and avoid drama instead of causing it :/

im literally just trying to vibe here 🧍🏻‍♀️

people need to stop being obsessed with me fr fr

Yk whats the worst part about these asks tho? This was a chance to actually consider your own mutuals and their internet and social presence and validate or question their actions. But what happened? 'Not my mutuals 😭😭😭😭' ig it's time you consider your mutuals are toxic sis

Ik some mutuals (mine) that have been around interacting with posts and blogs that are very vocal about hating and getting me off the internet lmao but here's my take from this: this is a social platform and what I do with it is my fucking business. It was, at a point, ok for people to make hate comments about someone because they thought only their circle of clowns was seeing it so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

nonynom beloved would you believe me if i said ive been there? I actually wanted to be moots with someone and we followed each other a day before the discourse happened and BOOM no words exchanged they blocked me and then a mutual of mine sent me an ss of something they said about me, so bestie just consider it a bullet dodged, at least now you know you don't want to interact with someone.

Bro if they really did that, thats pretty sticky smh 2/10 would not recommend such an interaction

again, im not a part of this 'skull anon' bs, im answering this ask as an ask because id respect anyone that would take out time to talk to me tbh

[caesarflickermans]

Hi hiii now I’m curious about you! What do/did you study in school or what would you like to do as a job? 😊

I'm studying political science in a master program right now (pretty much the same as postgrad, but it's 2 years). Right now I started my second year, but I will likely extend for half a year (so finish by end of 2022) because I got this really cool internship which would otherwise fall right into the time where one writes their thesis.

Politics can really be... everything. It's everywhere and it influences all of us in many meaningful ways. I've been incredible fortunate that the universities I've been at so far have all really focused / allowed me to focus on the sociological side of politics rather than I dunno, economics combined with politics.

I'm not really that sure what do with my polsci degree, but I have some areas that I've research wise focused in quite a lot and in my degree I can also pick two (of four) areas that I take expert classes on; which are political systems as well as international relations. I'm taking the first because it's mostly my passion and the latter because it's very needed in current politics (good for jobs, rip). Funnily, European Union is obviously really big and quite the focus point of this degree, but oof?? I really.. I love it as a concept, but bestie, why are you so overly complicated and bureaucratic ?!

What I love about political systems and studying those is that you can dip into a country and you learn so much new bits about that place but also about politics itself. Political culture so largely can differ and bring about a completely different system that's not always better or worse, but simply different (and that's so ! much fun! and so enlightening !!). I've done some project work on explaining democracy through analogue games, and the way one defines democracy is so very bound to the political culture that one grew up in. And that's not necessarily something between different continents, but take Switzerland and Germany as an example: One of my professors taught in both countries and she spoke about how Swiss people have this completely different understanding of how democracy ought to work, how and what the government should do and how political decisions ought to be made than Germans. And that's so ?? Fascinating ?? How our idea of even such a basic topic as "democracy" can differ so largely depending on where you were socialised in.

Having focused and written plenty about three countries (Germany, USA, UK), studied/lived in two of them (Germany and UK), and having written about several more in essays, I really enjoy getting to know those different political systems. Hence why, if I end up working internationally, would prefer really having the moment and time to work up close and focus on either above mentioned countries or really be given the time to immerse myself in those different cultures (I did want to master in Diplomacy for some time, but I didn't get the funding for it because abroad degrees are expensive and no one cares to fund the humanities 😞).

In a similar vein, I'm fascinated by how people interact and participate in those systems both with their government but also with one another. That's where the sociology and perhaps also psychology cuts in. My bachelor/grad university is semi-well known in the academic and press world as the one who produces the Voting Advice Application, a super famous tool here that practically everyone half-way interested in voting uses, and it's allowed me to hear from really quite famous and brilliant professors who have such a knowledge about voting. Elections really are quite among the top interests I have; whether it's about why someone goes voting or how they shape their decisions. One of my most passionate topics is lowering the voting age to 16, and I was incredibly fortunate to meet professors who are strong advocates for such policy changes and focused on this via research and theoretical work.

So, ideally I would like to work in a field somewhat related to any of those above-mentioned topics. I would also enjoy working in specific government departments such as the education one, the foreign office, or, recently came up, one for digitalisation because they also fund projects related to participation but in a digital format. One the other hand, I also know specific jobs in politics pay well, and let's just say I wouldn't mind interest representation (it's also much more ethical here than in the USA, even if it could be better). Like, you can also represent cool and interesting and worthwhile companies without, ya know, giving in to the Nestle overlords, but maybe that's my innocent heart in the 20s. I have also been thinking about becoming a party member and working for/with a party in the past year or so, but the problem with Germany is that its party system is more diverse than the one in the USA. Hence, picking a party is much more difficult, but also quite so final because you obviously somewhat showcase your ideology and switching would seem dishonest, ya know? Staying neutral, for now, is pretty wise if one wants to work in the government or represent Germany internationally, so I'm only dipping my toes in the water for now.

Speaking of which, I actually somewhat,, don't enjoy discussing politics IRL as much anymore? It's so very much my passion, and while I think a good society is an informed one, I'm tired of not only the false news, but also quite the slander against every single person interested in politics? As in "those up there" and the sheer hatred but at the same time lack of understanding about the political process (no, not every candidate or party can just do their own thing. Especially in a coalition they are simply not able to fulfil their promises, but that doesn't make them liars). It's really quite sad how some rich snobs getting into politics as a hobby somewhat ruin it for those who are passionate about politics and making a positive and lasting change to the system, but then - not all too dissimilar to you - change is actually hard and maybe we are all too idealistic for this harsh world :(. But IRL debates especially seem more prone to opinions being thrown about without any factual evidence behind them. Just recently I met some guy who broadly announced that a specific party had done X thing (not true), but you cannot HTML link something in an IRL conversation - nor would they believe it. Really sucks that this is an opinion game so much rather than a factual one (in moments where facts are important, such as party X represents opinion Y).

I'm really happy with my study choice and the path I have went so far. There's a few bits I wish I could have focused on more (my bachelor was a combination of English Studies and Politics), and while that was fun and definitely a good combination, I wish I had been able to take along more law studies specifically - studying law here is either a full 5-year commitment or not at all possible, and that's quite a pity because it's so vital to understanding political systems. I might just take a few classes here and there, maybe find some good online program when I'm done. I never feel like I'm quite done with wanting to learn more.

[anarmorofwords]

I kinda wanna write a better version of tlh where Tatiana is still insane but there's no Belial bc that makes zero sense to me

In this version there would be:

Kamanna done correctly with actual genderqueer rep and not toxic relationships

Barbra and Oliver bc fight me she didn't die

Genie and Filomena bc I love them and all the lightwoods are queer

The gracelet doesn't even happen bc I refuse to write that

Grace is pretty much still the same but she breaks off their(hers and james') relationship bc she notices that he loves Cordelia

No bad James. He's not a shitty person to Alastair, and he doesn't treat Cordelia like a sex object

Anna puts a stop to Kellington and Matthew's relationship before it gets serious. She also tries to get him to stop drinking all the time

Alastair apologizes around seeing them again for the first time. The merry thieves are a little reluctant because of some of the things he did but they don't actively try to keep him away from events that they're at

Matthew notices how Alastair looks at Thomas and locks them in the sanctuary with Genie and Cordelia's help

Grace gets badly injured due to a mistake in necromancy and Christopher helps her treat it without letting people know

Lucie meets Jesse, and falls in love ofc, so in order to bring him back successfully she asks Malcolm to train her in using her magic

Matthew opens up to his mom about the incident. She doesn't blame him at all and instead apologizes for often putting her work before him

Matthew finds out about Charles and Alastair because he found Alastairxs break up letter to Charles

Matthew, the mother hen he is, decided to attempt to murder his older brother, only being stopped by James who had been there at the right time

Kamala ends things with Charles and tells Anna that she still loves them and hopes that she will give her another chance

Anna told her that they needed time to think, and that she is worried how Kamala's reputation will be affected if anyone besides their friends and Anna's family finds out

Kamala respects her decision and doesn't contact her until Anna's ready to talk about things

The merry thieves don't ignore Christopher and they actively listen and help him

The merry thieves also aren't terrible to Grace bc they realize she's been isolated alone with Tatiana and 1) she might not understand what's saying/doing is wrong or 2) that sometimes she's trying to push them away so her abilities don't accidentally make them do something

Good tid parents

James and Alastair being respectful to each other despite personal differences

Matthew, Alastair, Kamala, Christopher, and Grace being besties, or as I call them, the neglected squad

No fetishizing mlm/wlw

Domestic cuddles and taking care of the other one when they're sick

Jesse/Lucie/Matthew pairing bc I love them and I refuse to pick between lucie/matthew and lucie/jesse

Christopher teaching Grace the elements(at the time) on the periodic table

Tatiana dies at the end yay

It's very unpolished and I'm open to b hearing any feedback and/or suggestions that anyone may have

The idea came to me and I decided it would be best if I told someone before I forgot

hi, I'm sorry it took so long,but I wanted to properly answer this and I keep having either internet connection issues or little time

DON'T BE SHY, WRITE THIS 👀

In all seriousness tho... THIS IS ABSOLUTE PERFECTION?!? I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START I AM UTTERLY IN LOVE WITH THIS IDEA, I NEED IT

Look, I've been on the verge of rewriting ChoI, and I keep saying I want someone to write a TLH that will live up to its potential, but I've never actually came up with a proper idea for it, and you?!! YOUR BRAIN DARLING THIS IS GENIUS

ok hold up I'll just react to each and every single one so

yes please?!? I mean it started off so sweet in EEV?! Also actually genderqueer Anna and not dancing around the subject like CC is doing now?! That's what they deserve, and that's what we all deserve too

yesss please. also just,,,, Barbara, the feminine, not-wanting-to-fight-which-doesnt-make-her-less-badass queen that she is, getting the page space and appreciation she deserves

that's actually brilliant?!? it would be so great, just imagine the new girl arrives for her travel year and Genie is completely awestruck. I'm so invested in Joshwood it's difficult to imagine not having them, but this is actually the only valid alternative?!

ok that's fine. I think it could still happen and be done well, but tbh for now... the gracelet doesn't seem to have done anything relevant to the plot itself? I mean yeah it messed up James's life and Jordelia, but what did it give Belial? Tatiana? nothing. It makes no sense atm.

could be! maybe she's still encouraged by Tatiana to befriend/seduce him, but without the gracelet it doesn't work out? or maybe James somehow manages to realize that she's in danger and he actually like,,,, kidnaps her? idk idk

yes. YES. just,,,,z James is a sweet compassionate literature nerd who accidentally makes a good leader and he actually cares about people, and not just judges them from his high horse; he does still have hero syndrome, but he's kind and respectful and overall a good character

ANNA INTERVENES ABOUT KELLINGTON PLZ. PEOPLE ACTUALLY NOTICE MATTHEW'S STRUGGLES. JAMES DOES, TOO, BECAUSE THERE'S NO GRACELET.

ok yes, so what about: basically TMT don't harass Alastair and accept his apology, and realize they were also being stupid and mean at times at the Academy (especially Math). Matthew doesn't want to accept Alastair's apology, because of The Sin, but his behaviour alerts the rest of TMT and they inquire what's wrong and he tells them about the sin and that's how he later tells his parents (because his friends encourage him) and as you say, she just hugs him and reassures him it's not his fault; so after that Matthew slowly begins to heal and accepts it wasn't Alastair's fault, and also since they've kind of adopted/started including Alastair in things, he can't help but notice he's actually changed and he even starts to grow fond of him

then like you said, Matthew notices Thomas likes Alastair PLEASE HE SO WOULD. I'm not sure about the Sanctuary, if it actually happens (I'll get to why later on), but him and Lucie get really invested in the matchmaking schemes, they include Genie/Kamala because these two are friends with Alastair (both? Or at this point only Kamala?) but they also share some Moments during their scheming/talking about love 👀 (yes I'm a Fairdale shipper, I think it's time to expose myself lol)

Which leads me to (sorry I'm going off order rn) YES YES YES LUCIE AND MATH PLEASE. A FELLOW SHIPPER, HELLO, NICE TO MEET YOU. But since we're actually fixing him then we can give Jesse a personality and I'm totally down for poly Math/Lucie/Jesse

Lucie seeking Malcolm's help in secret, morally gray heroine style?!? no, it's probably not legal. but also has there ever been a Shadowhunter like her? If the Law doesn't expect such situations, it can't really forbid them...

Plz Matthew ready to strangle the carrot when he learns about their relationship, YES. sure, maybe he's still not the biggest fan of Alastair, but he's seen how much the boy's been through and starts to develop an attachment to him, and besides, NO ONE DESERVES TO BE GROOMED AND TREATED LIKE THAT. He's SO MAD at Charles, and he confronts him about it - remembering Kellington as he does, and it makes him sick to think his brother would do the same thing to someone. Maybe he gets very emotional over this and later finally tells his friends about Kellington? Maybe they didn't know before, only Anna did? So when they all realize what was happening then they comfort him etc? Or maybe it's just Alastair that learns now, and the others knew before, and they share a bonding moment over that?

Injured Grace seeking Kit's help is a genius idea I didn't know I needed

Kamanna giving each other time and space and deciding they need to question their relationship and figure out if it actually makes sense would be great. Anna realising she's very privileged and Kamala doesn't have those same opportunities, and also in general realising coming out should never be pressured or forced. Just,,,, Anna being self-aware and respectful towards Kamala. Well-written Anna. Plz. Also Kamanna is actually developed and not just "in love" because,,,,, they're attracted to each other? Maybe even remaining friends while Anna makes up their mind?

yeah just TMT being more compassionate and less judgy because they're not written by Judith so her bias isn't projected onto them

It's not a want, it's a need. They adopt Alastair and Grace eventually. Like, maybe not literally - although, Grace? - but you know what I mean.

I think they all should just have various friendship dynamics and switch between them, because people need more than one friend group

no fetishizing, no watching your brother make out with his lover, yessss

yes domestic cuddles, affection, taking care of wounds, all those things. plz.

Gracetopher bonding over science yes

obviously. or maybe she's imprisoned?!

ok, now for some more notes/my ideas etc., if you don't mind:

I actually think Belial could still be featured? After all, I don't think Tatiana could do much on her own, and since she seeks help from demons, it makes sense to include a Greater Demon as well. But Belial would have to be a stronger villain, written better; I'll think more about this

if that was the case, the serial killer plot could still happen, but be done better. and it would allow for a scenario I talked about with @littlx-songbxrd to happen, where it's Alastair who's falsely accused of murder. It creates a great opportunity to explore some things, because we know Alastair is much more likely to be seriously suspected, considering all the prejudices and bad rep his family has and all that

...what do you say to well-written Jordelia? 👀 Cordelia hasn't been obsessively in love with James since childhood, she only had a crush then. And now that they meet again, she's fond of him but not in love, not straight away. They're both grown up, and different people, but as they spend more and more time together, they fall in love. What if Cordelia gets to flirt with some other boys first? What then. What if she ends up choosing James, instead of going for the only boy she's ever had feelings for and idealized since childhood. What if we even make it friends-to-lovers and have James be a little jealous at some point?! but not in a possessive awful way, just "oh damn oh no"

Now I won't know peace until this exists BUT THANK YOU

[brieflyimpossiblecreation]

So, this has been bothering me all morning.

@xcrisscrossx's point is what I see as the epitome of being aromantic and seeing others understand what is a huge part of me and relate it in a way others can understand made me quite happy even though I am not in either of those fandoms.

But @sasu-loves-naru's and @kawosh1inning's responses are the epitome of why I'm terrified of expressing my love for any fandoms or interests.

Now before I go on a tangent I want to preface this with:

1. I don't know anything about Sherlock or Naruto and any controversy about how the show's respective characters interact and handle their relationships

And 2. I'm not directly attacking any user depicted here. This is just the first solid example I could easily find of what I'm talking about, there are hundreds of post and whatnot that get the same point across.

As stated before, I am aromatic. Aromanticism is the lack of romantic attraction/ feelings or the need for those feelings. When I consume any media I like I'm of course going to find ways to relate to it. But from this post and hundreds of others, any mention of characters being 'just friends' or really anything but romantically or sexually involved with eachother is usually met with backlash like this. Accusations and being made into a joke. It hurts a lot and makes me and others scared to share our thoughts.

And no I'm not dense. I know that throughout history recent and far that lovers have been described as "best friends." I know people try to play off romantic relationships as really close friends when they're uncomfortable with it. I get it! Haha make fun of the stupid homophobes who can't stand seeing anyone of the same gender smooch or love eachother. I'm not homophobic though and I couldn't care less about whether mlm or wlw is shown! What I'm worried about it when I say I like seeing that these characters didn't end up dating because I relate to having friends I love so very much and being attacked!

ROMANTIC LOVE IS NOT MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANY OTHER TYPE OF LOVE!!!

The most recent example of this for me was with DreamWorks SheRa. WAY BEFORE the end of the series, one of the blogs I followed made a sort of callout post over someone who had commented something along the lines of seeing Catra and Adora as sisters. And the poster along with everyone in the comments and tags expressed disgust and calling them all sorts of names. I knew Adora and Catra were written romantically but I couldn't help the denial and want to see characters like me. Seeing that made me feel like if I had said anything similar then I'd also be called out and made fun of as homophobic and blind. Then the ending happened and I was happy for the major win for the LGBTQ+ community representation. I wasn't upset that two women kissed and married, I was totally indifferent! Then Bow and Glimmer ended up together, Mermista and Seahawk were implied, Scorpia and Perfuma got together and I just felt bitter and conflicted. I'm so happy for the representation that was given from the show but hated the message that ended up coming from it.

"Everything ended up a-okay in the ended because everyone ended up dating and getting married! Those besties? They loved eachother as romantic lovers all along! Even if you felt they didn't have the chemistry and thought it was kinda added in as a second thought! Doesn't matter because love! Yay!"

The fact that this message is pretty prevalent in both heterosexual and queer stories makes me feel isolated and hated. Stuff like this made me think I was broken and if I just get a girlfriend and force myself to "be romantic" then maybe eventually I'd be fixed. But that didn't happen, it never would, and that relationship hurt both of us. I'd never feel what she wanted and I'd never love her the same way she loved me. And I thought something was wrong with me. In reality, it was the thought that my lack of romantic attraction was something that needed to be "fixed."

Asexuals and Aromatics already have a hard time from both queer and non-queer communities so to have any secret speck or crumb of comfort get intentionally (or not) smacked from our hands is awful. I DON'T CARE about queer romances YOU DO YOU I'M PROUD OF YOU just don't come on to ME when I sheepishly and quietly mumble under my breath how I like them better as friends because I can see myself in those characters.