#she may be my next dnd character | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rennybu · 3 months

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hi.... i'm just a poor boy . who does not know the loam lore. would you be willing to share.... a summary.... (so curious i am a loam enjoyer)

oh my gosh hi griff..! oh there is so much to tell... i will h ave no choice but to put this under a readmore. the shortest answer is that he is my character of 3+ years in @jawsandbones homebrew dnd campaign and he is like a son to me. but to start off with baby pictures:

LOAM was born 52 years ago in a city called TILDEN, which is blocked off overland by a CURSED* SWAMP that creeps closer every year.

*Misremembered and only Recently Re-Contextualized Major Historical event

His mom is a shy, worried, and loving woman named Bayla - she's a druid and sells medicinal mushrooms of all sorts. His dad is an unwaveringly positive (but incredibly serious) mason named Uttara who proudly works on all sorts of projects around the city, especially major infrastructure. Yay stoneworkers!

(Because fantasy lifespans are strange and somewhat silly to me I just imagine Firbolgs to be stuck in their mid-20s existential dread until they're like at least 150. The backstory part of this spans literally 51 of his 52 year s of life. he's so young)

He got equal enrichment from time spent in nature with his mom as from time spent in the city with his dad. His nickname in the Tilden Firbolg community To This Day is "Always With Questions" - a kind of affix to differentiate him from any other Loams. He may not know much but he really would like to find out, please!!!! He sees a lot of beauty in the natural world, but his idea of what's natural is skewed somewhat by the uh, Curse. He once fell through some algae into a deep body of water and had a very fun memento mori experience as a kiddo (beautiful golden sunbeam shining onto a silty skull)

He got the name Loam very young from his interest in both his parents' work, which lead to him learning about soil types and uses in gardening and construction aklfhglskg. Loam was important for both jobs so he (in guess-what-I-just-learned little kid fashion) told everyone who would listen about it. The association STUCK and he's Loam now :].

His birth name is actually Rahara! but that's secret knowledge only his bestest friends and Tzip and some scarycool important NPCs know.

He loves beasts and magic and plants so much. And on the flip side he also loves and is fascinated by architecture and engineering. He never got any like, higher academic schooling or whatever, but had many many different apprenticeship type training relationships from his parents, other tradespeople in the city, from the senior rangers etc etc.

Small break to plug @jawsandbones lore packets for the Quarter Cities (including Tilden), Scarabae, and the overall campaign setting!!!! I'm just gonna talk about stuff without adding too much context of my own because AAA WORD COUNT!!!

The hole in Loam's ear was brought about by a shit ass Tilden local trying to tear his earring off him, since he'd bought it from a foreign merchant from a city Tilden/the Quarter has historically warred with. Loam's always been open minded and deeply curious about other cities, due to how isolated the bog is. Any visiting merchants are sources of wonder!!!! Even though he only bought the one hoop earring from the Quietus merchants (Mirjam and Mihail, mother and son!), after the ice was broken he stayed by their stall the rest of the day and talked about all kinds of things, and befriended Mihail!

Loam trained as a ranger as soon as he was old enough to do so!!!! He saw it as the next logical step past what his parents would be able to show him and was incredibly eager to get hands-on experience in the wilds. He met his first ever boyfriend among his peers there!!! Bragi... he has had many lovers and situationships in Tilden since, BUT only recently feels comfortable trying monogamy again after meeting Tzipporah.

Bragi unfortunately died badly to a creature in a traumatic backstory incident that left young Loam super fucking bereft and hyper aware of how easy it is to die. (Big monster attack + group of trainee rangers accompanied by a few more senior rangers + chaos and bloodshed. Loam carried Bragi to safety and tried resuscitating him but he was already gone. The experience made him uncomfortable with the idea of being in a defined, monogamous intimate relationship for the next like. 19 years. He felt like he got ripped in half!)

After the ranger's guild recovers from THE CREATURE ATTACK, Loam meets his close friend, Reece, a fellow ranger and Kenku (she looks like a masked shrike)!!!

He gets his septum pierced by the same visiting merchants from Quietus a few years after Bragi's death. It's a very important moment for him, where it feels like he can finally start to let himself change and grow beyond that event. He also spends more and more time in the city, away from the more rural/overgrown districts, and chases a love for the arts and partying and people, where he meets Kallirhoe (human, not a even a classed bard but like. an indie musician. an eboy if high fantasy had eboys. a tattooed twinkish fellow. you know the type)! They are very good friends who also have sex. Many days spent waxing poetic about THE BIG WIDE WORLD and how they'll never get to see it. (Spoiler: He sees it)

Loam gets into tarot as a hobby, and makes his own deck in a very scribbly freehand style with ink and charcoal!!!! he's slowly replacing them with more Worldly artwork - the deck he left home with was very. Tildencore

Many good years of being a party girl who has to go work a construction job tomorrow and then go be a ranger at 6. A rich and storied life. AND THEN THE GAME TIMELINE STARTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A path Through the bog has recently finished being built by Dagda, the Southern representative to the other Quarter Cities, making more trade possible overland, and making local tensions go even crazier. Also there are strange Awful Huge Scary Monsters appearing WORLDWIDE, so the Directions and the Three Kings of Scarabae and the remote island of Geest (ADRA'S HOME!) and the mysterious magical Widow's Wood are all like "STOP WAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING RN". Trials are held in the Western city of Dina to appoint FOUR TEAMS OF FOUR to help defend against the new threat. Loam is like. Well I've gotta fucking do that. I've got to try. If I'm not chosen, at least I've set foot outside. He has a fight with his mom about this, because she is terrified she will lose him, like she lost her mother in a previous conflict when Scarabae was occupying the Quarter, before Loam was born. He stands firm and his dad has his back, and ultimately he leaves with both their blessings, but his dismissal of his mom's feelings weighs heavy on him the longer he's away from home. (He has a big cry and reconciliation about this when he is next able to come home.)

I'm clapping and cheering and skipping joyfully because now he HAS MET HIS BESTEST, DEAREST, CLOSEST FRIENDS IN THE ENTIRE WORLD: ADRA ILSA AND TALEE!!!!!!! I have to be so careful now because we have no joke hundreds of pages of notes. I cannot read that shit on google docs mobile app. We are approaching session one hundred and fifty of this game. They love each other so fucking much. THEY ARE THE INFORMATION GATHERERS!!! A PARTY OF SLEUTHS!!!

He also has his meet-cute with Tzipporah at the trials, which in hindsight is hilarious, because of the whole, "Tzipporah was sent to the trials as a spy (by the very people responsible for the giant awful monster crisis) and immediately pegged Loam for an easy mark to get information from" thing. And he was 100% correct. But a lot has to happen before that gets revealed. They took a nice night walk and write each other big long letters. And Loam tells him soooooo much <3

At one point while exploring a wizard tower he attunes to a lightly cursed ring and forgets what his parents look like, like their likenesses are Gone from past and recent memory. Which is a big thorn of homesickness that he writes to them about. He has a big cry and stares at them both for a LONG time when he next sees them.

Also they save an orphaned Kenku from some bandits and now Loam has a little shoulder-sniper named Bubby. We have a son. A perfect little crow son who is really good at killing, with arrows. He hides things in Loam's hood regularly

Other major things include ummm umm Loam's TWO deaths, one during a dungeon-rescue type scenario in a room that was Flooding and full of Phantoms and also a charmed Druid (Feyan, good friends now) wildshaped into a big scary water snake. He was hurt bad and (comedically) levitated so he wouldn't DROWN but then got Phantom Speared right through the torso. Second one was because Tzip's evil half brother Vences was like, mad at him for being a good influence on Tzipporah and interfering with the spy duties. Chill touch so no healing + dagger in the ribs! Ow. Also the reveal that Tzip was a spy was happening like, simultaneously here so we were yowling and screaming. (Well. Talee and Co had their long time hunches about this. Loam and I had turned a beautiful blind eye to all suspicious activity)

ANYWAY HIS DEATH SCARS LOOK LIKE A COMET ABOVE HIS BELLY!!!! The spear scar made a patch of his fur turn white (front and back), and the dagger scar is its crude tail!

I am skipping over so many plot revelations i. This is just the Loam Cut. and it's not even all of it.

His buzzcut was for emotional superstitious reasons!!! He cut it after Death 2 and Tzipporah getting taken against his will back into Evil Gang. Loam's mom has a lock of his hair at home now. ALL THIS TO SAY TZIP IS OKAY, NO LONGER SPYING, WE RESCUED HIM AND RIPPED A MASK OFF HIM AND SAVED HIM FROM GETTING HIS MIND EXCAVATED ! SO LOAM IS GROWING HIS HAIR OUT AGAIN!

The deaths of his close friends and their allies have also been. insane for him to process. To return someone to life in this setting u need to like. entreat a Titan. plead on the deceased's behalf and offer something up for the chance to revive them. (NO player spells like revivify. house rule) So interacting with these entities he sees as like Both forces of the natural world AND of huge religious/cultural importance regionally. And to have their requests be HEARD? He loves magic he loves Titans. And the plot is unfolding in such a way that scares me so bad. He loves his titan (The Curious Spear) SOOOO MUCH he has like the foundational belief that it can see through his eyes. Even if not true it motivates him to always seek understanding of strange new things.

Oh my god I didn't even talk about his multiclass into druid. He's a druid also. Circle of the Stars!! As a navigational point. He loves them. He loves space. He loves geography and regional interpretations of constellations. He used to just do freehand observations but truly became dedicated to charting the skies of every place the party travels to, after Tzipporah gifted him a grid-lined journal <3 <3 <3 STARRY FORM!!!!!!

His awe and inspiration and hunger for knowledge is the well he draws magical power from. My Boy is thematically bound up in the soggiest parts of this earth and also the unknowably distant stars above and I'm normal about it (lie) (There is a new and scary Third Thing rising which is the space between. I <3 Void). I know i draw him beige and green but his like, character colour theme is. Dusk to me. Gloaming. When the world is lit like a dream <3

In summary. In conclusion. He and Adra and Ilsa and Talee (and the rest of the Four of Four) are trying to prevent Global Disaster of an existential scale never before seen and are being very brave about it.

Loam wants to understand everything about Everything. Because understanding is love. Unfortunately there are hostile resentful and vengeful forces making this hard to do. Most recently by saving a city we Unmade a magically sustained centuries-old library. And we haven't had time to like fully let that sink in. Because of the horrors of war and being Four of Four means responding to emergencies and protecting cities as best we can against a foe that was forgotten by history until like, 10 months ago. Less, even. I hope this is anything. I hope u are his friend now too because he is yours

good lord how could i forget. His gender is male in such a way that he does not give a shit about it. He's one of the girls. He's genderless. Like a knight. His sense of identity is built on Living Laughing and Loving.

his personal goals are 1. to uncurse the bog in such a way that the wrongs committed by Tilden historically are brought to light and righted, 2. to get super married to Tzipporah and build a house together, and 3. to somehow, eventually, through great teamwork and effort, cure(?) the dreadful lingering soul plague on the island of demeter. HUMBLE! OH and to make a finished star chart covering the entire planet. humble.

thank u for reading here are his current stats

#titan campaign #loam #aart #theres some secret goodies under the readmore btw #IM SOOOOOO SORRY FOR THE CHAOTIC FORMATTING AND HOW MUCH I JUMP AROUND #i will happily answer more questions. and i wont take months to respond i promi #GRIFF... THANK YOU SM

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succubusdaydream · 3 months

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The Smell of Weave and Honey

AN: I would like to make it clear that I do not know any DND lore and how certain creature’s work. I am simply going with my own interpretations. I have also not written smut in YEARS so it may be bad and you're not allowed to be mean to me. This oneshot is a long one and has characters that are more than likely ooc. Used they/them for Tav but they are described with a kitty <3

Masterlist

Word count: 3525

Warnings?: 18+ || Smut || P in V || Badly written smut and dirty talk || Be nice to me or I'll cry ||

---

A lot has happened recently. One sunny day you were simply enjoying a meal in the brothel of Baldurs Gate, Sharess’ Caress, and the next you were crashing a nautiloid mindflayer ship. During that time, you had found people with the same problem as you. A half-elf cleric named Shadowheart, a wizard from Waterdeep named Gale, who had an orb of pure magic in his chest, and a silver haired vampire named Astarion. There was also a Tiefling from the hells, Karlach, who had a mechanical heart. Wyll, a human warlock who was soon turned into a devil by his patron, Mizora, for not killing Karlach. And finally Lae’zel, a Githyanki who was rough and had many issues getting along with Shadowheart.

Since then, you all had saved Tieflings in a Druid’s Grove by eliminating a whole camp of goblins, journeyed trough the Underdark, and blown up an old church in a mountain pass. Through it all though, you hadn’t had a decent meal. A decent meal being sex. Back in the grove, you had taken a Tiefling, Rolan, to the woods and revealed your true form to feast. You had, of course, wiped his memory of it the next morning. But it still wasn’t enough. Not with the shadow cursed lands you found yourself in.

You had been given warnings about it from the Druid’s old leader, Halsin, who had taken up a tent in your camp. Its land was shrouded in a curse that consumed life around it and took anyone who strayed too far from light. The paths scattered throughout was hard to navigate and you often found yourself ambushed by cursed animals who had succumbed to the shadows. It made each return to camp like the heavens as you were finally able to rest.

Tonight though, it was different. You had found an Inn, sheltered in a globe of light, like that of the moon. In it, your group was interrogated by a women named Jaheira. A High Harper from Baldur’s Gate who led her other Harpers through the lands. When she deemed you safe, she pointed you to a cleric, Isobel. She had placed the protective barrier that kept the shadows away. She had blessed you to keep you protected from the ‘lesser effects of the shadows.’ And that when he came. A winged man named Marcus who attacked, claiming ‘The General’ wanted her alive. And the fight that ensued left you exhausted.

You had returned to camp, bloodied, and battered. You waved off Shadowheart who offered to heal, stating you simply wanted to sleep. Really, your energy was completely drained. Even resting wouldn’t bring it back up. You needed to eat, and soon. You’re sure Astarion would offer, but with him also having a tadpole in his brain, you weren’t sure if wiping his memory would work. And he wasn’t the one you wanted anyway. The one you wanted to feed off was Gale. The wizard who consumed an orb of pure Weave. You had tried to, at the Grove party, but he couldn’t. Not with the risk of the orb detonating. But now, he had control over it. You could feed.

Your group was accepting that he was a timebomb and that Astarion was a vampire, so surely, he would be accepting of your biology. You had given him artifacts to keep his hunger at bay, certainly he would help with your own hunger. And once everyone was asleep, you left your tent, stumbling towards Gale’s. His scent was heavy. Like fresh books and pure magic. It was delightful. It made your hunger worse as you slipped into his tent, reaching to brush his hair from his face.

His eyes quickly shot open, a curse falling from his lips as he realized who was above him. “Mystra’s eyelid! Tav?! You scared the hells out of me. What are you doing?” He sat up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He quickly scanned over your body in confusion. “Are you alright? You look rather… sickly.” Your body was hot, and your face flushed. You could feel your wings and tail trying to burst through your disguise and your head pounded as your horns tried to pierce through your skin.

You crawled to him, quickly getting into his space and inhaling his scent. “Please. Please it’s so hot. I’m starving. You smell amazing. The other wizard wasn’t enough. But you… you smell delicious.” His own face flushed as your low voice reached his ears.

“Delicious? Tav, what are you on about? Starving?” His words were cut short as he felt something wrap around his leg. Looking past your body, he saw it. A light pink, heart-tipped tail. And when he turned back to you, he jumped. Your skin color had changed to the same pink and your eyes were different. They looked as if pink flames danced through them and from your back were large wings, spread widely as you crawled closer to him.

“Please. I haven’t had a good meal in ages. You smell delicious.” Your nose pressed against his neck and your hand rubbed against his chest. A succubus. They’re a gods damned succubus. Your breath was hot against his ear as your teeth nibbled his ear lobe. “Tell me to stop and I will. I won’t take what you won’t give me.” Despite being nearly starved, you were still in the right state of mind to leave if he wanted you too.

“You’re a succubus. That’s why you’ve seemed so tired. You haven’t… eaten in days.” You nodded quickly, inhaling deeper and running your hand down his chest and stomach. Your breath hitched though as you felt him. His hands moving to caress your sides, gripping your skin. “When you asked for help, back at the party. You needed a to feed that night, right?” He pulled you closer and your heart pounded in your chest, your tail wrapping around his leg tighter.

“I’ve been wanting you since I pulled you from that stone. Your scent is everywhere. You smell of books and magic, I’ve wanted nothing more than to have you since then.” You quickly find yourself sitting on his lap, arms wrapped around his neck as your nails run softly down his neck, causing goosebumps to appear on his skin. “Please, don’t I deserve a good meal after all I’ve done for everyone? Can’t I be selfish for just one night?”

His grip on your waist tightened as you moved your hips against him, a groan leaving his mouth as he bites his cheek. He went to speak but was cut off by you biting his neck, his fingers digging into your skin. “You deserve something too. Being secluded in your tower, not feeling the touch of another. I can smell in from you. Your desire. All that pent up lust you’ve been holding back. You can release it. You can let everything out on me.” You pulled back, grabbing his face with your hands and bringing it close to your own. Your lips just barely brushed against his as you ground your hips harder into him.

You had barely gotten started, but you could already taste the lust seeping from him. He truly was pent up from being sequestered in his tower. Not trusting the orb to handle him so much as pleasuring himself. He was already hard and groaning with the simple movement of your hips. And you were eager to continue. He was just as delicious as he smelt.

You went on for only a few minutes before he growled and you soon found yourself under him, your hands pinned above your head by his own. “You really are desperate. Can’t even ask politely for a good meal and instead have to sneak into my tent in the middle of the night.” His leg came up, moving your own to reach a hand down, softly moving his fingers down your chest and stomach. His fingers hooked under your shirt, moving it up to reveal your succubus marking. A marking all succubi and incubi had over their wombs or lower stomachs. They mostly resembled hearts, some with wings and some surrounded by flames.

With your consumption of the lust in the air, your true form was finally revealed. Full wings splayed out beneath you, tail still wrapped around his leg and a set of horns protruding from your skull. Your light pink skin shined with sweat and your marking began to glow a hot pink as Gale’s hand trailed lower. “I wanted this to be perfect. To bond in the way that gods do, but I don’t think you’re giving me that option. And I don’t think that would satisfy you as much as this will.” He’s wanted me too? Since the beginning? I don’t want anyone else anymore, just him.

With one hand trailing farther down, his other keeping your arms held down, and his leg keeping yours apart, you could do nothing but squirm with anticipation. Your chest heaved as you tried to free your arms, wanting nothing more than to pull him down and meet his lips. The little taste you had gotten wasn’t enough and your desire for more only grew the closer his hand got to your core.

“Please. Please I’ll be good. I promise, I just need-“ Your words were cut off by your own moan as his hand finally reached your core, his fingers teasing your folds. You nails dug into your palm as you clenched your fists, you back arching off of Gale’s bedroll. Your tail tightened around his thigh as you moved your hips, wanting any friction you could get.

Your begging continues until he finally inserted his fingers, you walls greedily accepting him as you let out another moan. His other hand finally left your wrists, quickly covering your mouth as he shushed you. “Now now, we don’t want the others hearing, do we?” His voice was low as he brought his head closer to your ears. His fingers curled inside you and your eyes rolled back. If his fingers felt this perfect inside of you, you could only imagine how other parts would feel.

With your arms free, you pushed his hand away and pulled him down, colliding your lips and easily sliding your tongue in his mouth. His fingers moved quickly in and out of you, the only noises in the tent being your moans and the sound of your mouths moving together. Your arms tightened around his neck as your hips rolled dipper into his fingers. You could feel your wetness dripping onto the bedroll below you.

As his fingers scissored inside your pussy, his thumb moves to your clit, circling the nerve and enticing a gasp from you. Your arms around his neck moved down his back, your now claw-like nails dragging down and tearing at his silk shirt. Realizing he still needs air, Gale pulled away from you, his breaths heavy and his eyes looking straight into yours. The eye contact only made you more wet, your walls clenching around his digits.

You sounded pathetic, pleads leaving your lips as your hips mindlessly grinded into his hand, chasing the high that was quickly building in the pit of your stomach. His face was in your neck, trailing kisses and bites on your hot skin, faint hisses leaving his mouth every time your claws dug into him. “Please, please I’m so close. Gods you feel amazing~” What felt like hours was in reality seconds, as you reached your peak, your body arching into his and your eyes rolling back. You mouth hung open in silence as your slick coated his fingers, dripping out of you steadily.

Gale eyes locked onto where you body met his hand, fixated at watching as pearls dripped from you. “Gods, you’re beautiful.” You whined as he removed his fingers, and you could barley catch a glimpse of him licking you off them. It made you clench around nothing and wrap your legs around his waist. You pulled him back down, meeting his lips once more and groaning at the taste of yourself mixed with his salvia.

“I need you. Please, I’ve been so patient. Please, Gale.” Your words were muffled as you snapped your fingers, the little clothes you had on disappearing along with his. You could finally see just how hard he had gotten. What he missed in length, he made up for in girth. The head was a pale pink, and a few small veins decorated the shaft. Your legs around him tightened, pulling his hips closer to yours. He wasn’t even inside, and you were already feeling the pit form in your stomach.

He brought his forehead to yours, and reached down to guide himself in. He had barley entered you and you were already clenching around him, your arms secured tightly around his shoulders and your eyes staring deeply into his. It only took moments before he was fully sheathed inside you, sucking in a deep breath as your hips met. He filled you perfectly, your walls forming beautifully to his shape.

“Gods, you’re warm. Made just for me.” He stayed still for a moment, wrapping one arm around your hips and pulling them up. The new angle let him go deeper, a loud moan emanating from your throat and your claws once again dug into his skin, tearing at it easier with no clothes in the way. Your legs twitched and you tried to move, seeking anything you could take.

“Haven’t- ahh- haven’t I begged enough? Please~ I need you so badly. You feel amazing. Made just for you~” Your voice was whiny yet low, trying to keep in mind your sleeping companions still within earshot.

“Have you?” He slowly pulled out, but before you could whine again, he quickly snapped his hips back to yours. All reminders of your sleeping party left your mind, and a loud yelp left you, quickly turning into moans as his hips pistoned against yours. The sound of his skin meeting yours echoed with them, filling the quiet night air as he pulled your body closer. His other arms wrapped around your back, holding your body against his, yours forming perfectly against his.

Your mouths met again, desperate to get another taste of him as your grip around him tightened. The air was hot and smelt of sex, the noises of everything growing louder with each thrust he gave. Almost no thoughts ran through your mind other than his scent, the way he felt and another specific one. Breed. I want him to breed me. He was the only thing you thought about as your mouths moved in sync and the pit in your stomach grew.

The grip your legs had on his waist tightened and you moans turned to mind-blanked babbles, to cock-drunk to form coherent words as his speed picked up. The lust in the air got heavier, a tale-tell sign that he was also close. With his grunts getting louder and movements sloppier, you finally voiced your loudest thought. “Inside. Please, I can feel it. So close~”

Closely after, his hips met yours once more and your vision flashed white. Your mouth hung open as you both reached your peaks, feeling thick ropes of cum nearly hit your womb. Your heartbeat pounded in your ears and pulsed through your body, your breaths heavy as Gale softly laid you back down, holding the back of your head softly as he too caught his breath. Your grip around him scarcely loosened and your vision remained blurred for a moment before refocusing on his face. He looked gorgeous, face flushed, and his hair stuck to his skin with sweat.

His hands reach out to softly caress your face, brushing your hair away and cupping your cheek. And when his eyes met yours, a smile crossed his face. “There you are. You alright, Love?” His hoarse voice was soft and low as his thumb ghosted over your cheekbones. You could only nod in response. “I need to hear you say it.”

Your hand moved to his, intertwining your fingers as you nodded again. “I’m perfect. Gods, I’m perfect. Just need to catch my breath.” With your hand over his, you nuzzled your cheek deeper into his palm, inhaling his scent again and sighing. “You were perfect.”

He let out a laugh through his nose, slightly shaking his head. “You’re a succubus, I’m sure you’ve had better.” You quickly shook your head, the grip on his hand tightening as you brought your other hand up to caress his own cheek.

“I’ve had many, but you’re different. I’ve never been so attracted to a scent before. You’re intoxicating and it feels like I can never get enough of you. I’ve tried my hardest to hold back my hunger till I could have you. I took another wizard at the Grove and could only think of how it wasn’t you.” You pulled his face close and touched your forehead to his. “Besides, you’ve been to bed with a goddess. I’d say that’s better than a succubus.” Before he could protest to your statement, you pressed your lips to his again. Though, this time your kiss held very little lust. It was now replaced with passion and love. It was soft and slow rather than heated and heavy.

The rest of the night you lay in his arms and you would occasionally have another round, each one broken by soft conversations and declarations of love. He had expressed how much he had fallen for you within the past weeks of your adventure. How he hadn’t felt like this for someone in quite some time. And in return, you told him the same. How you had never wanted someone in such a passionate way. How others you had taken were only meals and how you almost never saw them again. But for him, you wanted to stay close. Perhaps even after all of this is over. You’d go anywhere as long as you were by his side. That was all you wanted now.

---

Voices had woken you up along with the smell of something cooking. Looking around the tent, yours and Gale’s clothes were neatly folded near the front flap, appearing there after you snapped them off.

Still groggy, you grabbed your underwear and the silk purple shirt Gale had worn to bed. After slipping them on, you stepped out of the tent and into the campgrounds. The stretch and yawn you made caught the attention of your fellow camp members. “Good morning.” Before you could comprehend what was happening, the shiny end of a rapier was glistening in front of your eyes.

“Who sent you, devil? What have you done to Gale?” Wyll’s deep voice reached your ears. He sounded angry and when your eyes finally focused on him, you could see that he was. Behind him, Karlach and Lae’zel also held their weapons. Their eyes were focused on you, almost waiting for you to move. Wanting you too. “Are you one of Zariel’s lapdogs? One of Mizora’s?”

You held your hands up and shook your head. “Wyll what are you talking… about?” Then you realized. Your true form was visible. You had forgotten to put your human look back on before you walked out of your tent. “Ok, why don’t we all just calm down, yea? It’s me. It’s Tav.” Your voice shook, nervous to how the others would react to your heritage. From the look on their faces, they didn’t believe you.

That was, until you forced a connection with Wyll’s tadpole, groaning in pain as you showed him your first meeting. When he lowered his weapon, his expression of defense turned to that of disbelief. “Tav? You… you’re a devil?” The others lowered their own weapons, stepping forward to better look at your true form.

You let out a nervous chuckle and spread your arms out. “Umm, I guess. I’m a succubus, so I suppose you’d say I’m a sex devil.” You cleared your throat, shivering as Karlach’s warm fingers reached for your tail. “A succubus with a sensitive tail, Karlach.” You turned your body away from her as she apologized. Everyone stood around for a few minutes before the chatter was broken by a voice behind you.

“Tav? Have you seem my-“ Gale’s shirtless body emerged from the tent and his words were cut off as he looked up, his eyes meeting everyone else’s. When he gazed over your body, horns and all, his face dropped. “Oh hells.”

Masterlist

#gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #bg3 gale #gale dekarios x reader #bg3 #bg3 x reader #bg3 x tav #tav reader #gale x tav #gale dekarios x tav #gale dekarios fanfic #bg3 fanfic #gale dekarios smut

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gwndolnfrankln · 2 years

Text

i'm not in love - eddie munson x reader

🎧.˳⁺⁎ summary: as the photographer of the school's journalism club, you were given a task to take pictures of the hellfire club for the highschool yearbook. when everyone notices a sudden change in eddie munson's demeanor the night of the campaign, it may or may not have something to do with you.

⋆ warnings: 18+ only, minors DNI, swearing, fingering, making out, dirty talk, aftercare, orgasm, eddie munson (bc this man is the death of me)

⋆ a/n: based on the song: i'm not in love by 10cc. i had a lot of first time's writing this: my first smut, fluff ig and of course, eddie munson <3 the grammar still needs a bit of work but this one's special, folks.

⋆ word count: 3645

I'm not in love

So, don't forget it

It's just a silly phase I'm going through

And just because

I call you up

Don't get me wrong, don't think you've got it made

I'm not in love, no no, it's because...

Scattered voices fell into hushed whispers the moment you walked inside the campaign room, steadily following your presence like a prancing fox. With your photo camera in hand, you sauntered slowly, trying to blend with the crowds in normal hallway fashion, but to no avail their eyes were on you. Your skin prickled and flushed; goosebumps flared up your arms while you unacknowledged a drop of sweat trickling down your forehead. Even with the air of suspense lingering in the room, a few familiar faces waved at you on the long table across from you. You recognized some of them, boys you’ve had classes with and others you’ve seen around the neighborhood, but the one you’ve secretly kept a keen eye on was the man sitting at the far end of the table: Eddie the “Freak” Munson.

Before the start of spring break, Nancy assigned you to take pictures of the clubs for the yearbook. For the week, you’ve just done Chess, Taekwondo, Debate and the cheerleading squad. You wrote the list with the help of Nancy, arranged them in numerical order, putting Hellfire Club at second-to-the-last. Even though you’ve known Dustin and Mike since they were little kids, you were half-convinced by your parents to stay away from anything DnD-related or as they would like to call it, “the Devil-worshipping game”.

You knew it was never like that since you used to play as a young girl, wholeheartedly fascinated with character sheets and the little details put into these games. Overall, you respected the heart and passion of these players. So much so that every time a certain guy with long curly locks starts to march on his usual table, calling out every clique in the cafeteria, you couldn’t help but stare, longer than one’s supposed to every time someone makes a scene at lunch time.

“I’m not in love.” You whispered to your friend, Megan, as you placed your pile of textbooks inside your locker then checked the state of your dusty old camera with a few snaps. Megan rolled her eyes with a teasing smirk, knowing that that’s not the definite answer to what she saw at lunch lately. “Yeah, right. A few minutes worth of Eddie’s lap dancing versus your twenty minutes of staring doesn’t seem to look up on your behalf.” You grunted, showing no signs of defense at Megan’s conviction.

“Ha, ha. Alright Megan, you got me. Now, can I have some of your gum?” Megan handed you a packet of pink gum from her skirt pockets, putting on red lip gloss in front of the locker’s side mirror. “Okay, fine. I’ll let you change the subject for now. But I want to hear more about this little crush on the phone later.” Megan clapped your cheeks with pouty lips before she walked off to her next class. As you closed your locker doors shut, your heart jumped right out of its chest when you noticed Mike’s presence, not really knowing how long he was standing there.

"Hey Mike, what's up?" You didn't know why you fidgeted like a kid grabbing candy from the sweets bowl; judging by Mike's weird expression, he must've waited by your side the whole time. "Well, I'm wondering if you can take Lucas' spot for Hellfire later, since he can't come because of the championship." You remembered the game because of Nancy, when you insisted on taking photos on the court instead of the other clubs. Nancy must’ve seen right through you, but you gave up all your pleas just to get the job done and not mess with Nancy’s temper any longer.

“Sure, but I won’t play. I have to take pictures for the senior yearbook. The layout committee saved you guys a page.”

That very answer leads you here in the old theater room, now fully occupied by the Hellfire club. Mike explained to you in a hurry that they desperately needed someone to replace Lucas for the evening or else their DM would be bothersome if they didn’t get a replacement for tonight's DnD session. It was a surprise to them that someone like you would want to watch them play. You were quite infamous for dating a lot of guys since you were thirteen; puberty has both been a blessing and a curse.

Dustin cleared his throat to break the prolonged awkwardness, asking Eddie to continue but it was only met with coughs from the other members. You were avoiding the table the whole time and decided to play around with your camera until they decided to continue, yet Dustin’s question was only met with more silence. That’s when you looked up for the first time, and your eyes were met with Eddie’s, who was across from you sitting on his throne.

His curly bangs failed to cover the dark look in his eyes, his all too familiar gaze sharpening the strictness of his jaw. His intertwined fingers went rigid just by the way his metal rings stopped clicking against each other, while his chest heaved heavily like something was about to explode from inside him. Unfortunately, you knew that he was going to react the way he did before you entered the room. His avoidant stares from your side of the cafeteria, the bitter tone in his voice when he asked Mrs. Hanks to change his seat farther from yours, and his cold invisible cape that brushed your shoulders every time he walked past you in the hallway. The summer of ‘86 was a memory you can't etch to forget, and it was evident that it was also that time for Eddie’s.

I like to see you

But then again

That doesn't mean you mean that much to me

So, if I call you

Don't make a fuss

Don't tell your friends about the two of us

I'm not in love, no no, it's because...

The momentum in Eddie drastically changed as he started reading the folder in front of him, narrating flawlessly. “The hooded cultists chant,” Once again, his eyes darted to yours while you captured the game with the snap of your camera. “‘Hail Lord Vecna’. They turn to you, remove their hoods. You recognize most of them from Makbar. But there is one you do not recognize,” Their eyes were on him now, clenching their fists as they listened intently.

“His skin shriveled, desiccated. And something else.” Eddie rose from his seat and placed an arm behind him. “He is not only missing his left arm, but his left eye!” Everyone clamored in their seats as you took the perfect shot at the edge of the table. You can tell by the look of amusement on Eddie’s face that he had accomplished his expectations for the campaign, placing them right where he wanted them to be.

"No!"

“He was killed by Kas!”

“So, it was thought, my friends. So, it was thought. But Vecna lives!”

The game started from there. You were quite enthralled the whole entire time, adoring the sight of cards and notebooks scattered everywhere on the table. You even placed your camera down to shout when one of them never got lucky with the dice. It was surprisingly fun at times, enraging at some points, but the thrill distracted you from Eddie.

Well, that part isn't fully true.

You would find yourself smiling when he laughs back at his throne, or even look at his fingers clenching the handles of his throne while the other members of the club attack the enemy. Tonight was the first time you’ve ever been this close to Eddie. This was the first time he ever looked at you, saw you and stood in the same room as you. Every school day, he fished you out like a choking hazard, and you deserved it. This was punishment—a punishment that you’re willing to take since that last summer.

Your final days with him were nothing short of regretful choices. You were scared to be sure, the assurance that someone would actually want you apart from anything else. You shroud love with cowardice, completely used to the idea that any guy can easily discard you like garbage. A simple, pretty girl who never took real relationships "too seriously", or a himbo who only dated "just for the fun of it", whatever else the rest of the school talks about behind your back. But you knew— you knew deep down that Eddie was different from the rest of them.

It was very hot that day; you were sweating profusely through your striped polo shirt and you were in a desperate need to find a water bottle. In the woods, you were walking down the faint grassy trail, where you heard loud music playing from his van. You rounded towards the back of the vehicle, the backdoors hanging open in both directions. That’s when you saw Eddie for the first time.

It was like a scene from a sappy movie, where everything around you went into slow-motion and the world just stopped turning; it's as if nature paused its shift for the two of you. His dark curly locks were tied up, a few strands of hair hanging like ivy vines on his neck. He was wearing a Black Sabbath t-shirt and gray denim pants with handcuffs around his waist. The loud blaring of his guitar stopped when he narrowed his brown eyes towards you, like the world also stopped turning for him. “What are you playing?” You asked him while he drank a water bottle, his steady gaze still on your figure. “It’s an original. I’m still playing around with the chords, but I think it’s going well from there.” He placed his red guitar down, leaning it carefully against the wall before he sat at the end of his van, close to where you’re standing. "Is this what led you here?"

"That was you? It sounded like it was played from one of your records or something.” You sat next to him, your hips touching slightly against his. After he took another sip of his mineral water, he handed it to you with a small, endearing smile, gesturing you to take it. You smiled back at him, mindlessly placing the cap near your lips and flushed in embarrassment when you realized that you haven’t opened the bottle yet. Eddie chuckled softly at the sight, before he wrapped his fingers around yours on the water bottle to loosen the cap for you. “There you go.” He leaned back on his side, resting his weight on the palm of his hand. You tried not to stare too much but to no avail, you find yourself lingering at the sight of his bat tattoos. “Thanks.” You finally looked away then started drinking like a Nomad in the middle of a Sahara Desert.

“So, what are you doing here? In the middle of the woods, I mean.” You set the empty bottle down on the space between you and Eddie.

“Oh, my uncle kicked me out just this afternoon. He didn't want me to disturb his guest with solo practice.” The lids of Eddie’s eyes fluttered upwards to the sky, the blues settling down into a shade of orange. You can’t help but notice his vibrant brown eyes, the sweat trickling down the sides of his neck and his pink chapped lips. You wondered how someone like him could look so beautiful in the mellow glow of the summer heat. Icarus, who flew too close to the sun.

The humid afternoon air placed its fiery warm hands on your back, pushing you carefully towards him. Eddie stared back at you the moment you leaned in closely, his gaze traveling every delicate feature on your face. “I want to hear you play sometime.” You whispered into his ear, feeling the vibrations of your throat sending electric sparks all over your insides. Then that smile, that crazy grin of his, sent you into waves of unfamiliar, exciting emotions.

You want him to smile at you like that forever.

“I’ll be here whenever you need me.” He placed his hand on top of yours, feeling the warmness of his palm come into contact with the coldness of your sweaty backhand. Instead of thanking him like a simpleton, you find yourself touching his left cheek with your other palm, then slowly but surely kiss the skin closest to his lips with a flourish.

The next thing you know, you find yourself around this part of the woods for quite some time. The unknowing trail became a familiar place to you, the anticipation creeping into your veins the moment you set foot on grassy paths, broken cobblestones and fallen branches. The smell of the smoky engine wafted your senses completely, making you break off into a sprint until you knocked repeatedly on the metal doors. He pulled you inside his van, his arms tightly wrapped around your back in a warm embrace. You both laughed like children, letting your bodies slowly drift into nerve-wrecking oblivion.

His shoulders relaxed as you placed your fingers behind his neck, his steady breaths fanning against your skin. Your face was like a pleasing ladder to his eyes; he climbed at the sight of your lips, up to the bridges of your nose, then your eager eyes, covered slightly by the strands of your hair. He gently pushed it away with his thumb, then leaned his head to the side to press his soft lips against yours. Your lips moved with his, an easy rhythm you’ve memorized and pictured so vividly even when you're fast asleep.

Both his hands traveled down to your waist, pressing his fingertips hungrily onto the fabric of your shorts. You grunted and bit his bottom lip mischievously, signalling him to carry you to his leather seats and set you down with his calloused palms, kneading the back of your thighs. He kneeled down in front of you and set your legs wide apart, before pressing his thumb to the wetness in between. “You’re getting wet down there, sweetheart. It’s a shame that it's still covered for me like that, would it?” He continued rubbing small circles onto the wet fabric of your shorts, sending you into a euphoric high of teasing pleasure. Your teeth sinked itself deeply into your lips, holding back a groan you so desperately want to let out as his index and middle finger swiped your covered folds like a credit card holder.

Your back arched at the overpowering sensation, as you carried your hips closer to where his fingers played with your pussy. He started unbuttoning your shorts, then slid it down to your curled ankles along with your white floral-patterned panties. Out of impulse, your thighs closed itself like a clam, your bare sex flushed at Eddie’s ravenous sight. Slowly, he slid one hand in between your legs, which opened itself so eagerly to him like it had a mind of its own. He started rubbing and flicking your clit with his thumb, while the other sneaked itself under the hems of your shirt to pinch your hardened nipple.

You gasped and roughly grabbed his bony wrist as he slid a finger inside of you, feeling the coldness of his metal ring hitting your warm folds. “Fuck, you’re so tight for me, sweetheart.” His large, expectant eyes found its way back to you, crazily grinning at the look on your face. You can’t help but drool when his index finger slithers side to side between your inner walls, not minding the sloppy sound it makes. You closed your eyes as he thrusted one more finger inside of you without any preparation whatsoever, which is something Eddie likes to do: surprise you.

Both fingers slowly push themselves inside you; your mind going completely blank at the depth of his place. He pulled and pushed it back more rapidly, his fingertips pressing harder against your wet walls as you swallowed large gulps of saliva down your throat. Your muscles contracted as his swift fingers obliterated your pussy in painful yet wonderful delight, savoring every inside space as possible. Your feet lifted themselves off the ground, while he held your raised hips with his rough calloused hand; one that would surely leave a mark in the showers later.

“I’m getting there, Eddie.” Your unsteady breaths made it harder for you to speak properly. You can’t even think clearly because of him. Everything from his soft long curls brushing past your shoulders to the hungry look in his eyes as he goes down on you. “Cum for me. I know how much you want to cum all over me.” Like a struck of lightning, he slid a third finger in between your petal-like folds and pushed it farther inside, to the point of absolutely no control. You rolled your eyes to the back of your head as you cursed his name over and over again, not wanting him to stop. With one final bounce, you shuddered under your raspy breath as his drenched fingers released itself from your stretched pussy.

Eddie stood up from his knees and kissed you on the forehead, staring down at you with that dimpled smile of his. “Was I good?” He plopped himself down beside you and snuggled his head on your clavicle. Underneath all that confidence, there was a desperate tremor in his voice that you knew all too well. He wanted to be good for me, you smiled softly at the thought.

He wrapped his arms around your shoulders and looked up at you expectantly, waiting for an answer. “What, why are you smiling?” Eddie asked, his smile slightly faltered. You faced him quickly, your body leaning slightly to his side. “You were amazing.” You gave him a small peck on the cheek.

Now, there’s that amazing smile of his, shining brightly at you like those many times before. “You've also become a different person when you’re horny. You really like to talk me down, huh.” Eddie covered his eyes embarrassingly while laughing at your brutal honesty and critique. “I’ve always wanted to please you in the best way, that’s all.” He whispered into your ear as his hand scooched you closer to him, gently rubbing your sides with his palm.

You grinned at his words from ear to ear, then subtly caressed his cheek with the small of your thumb, closing the tight space between you into a passionate kiss, letting his soft moans melt under your tongue. “I love you.” He muttered in between kisses; his brown eyes significantly locked into yours. You inhaled from surprising exhilaration, resting your forehead against his.

“I love you too, Eddie.”

Wanting him is never the same without him. If only you knew that your careless past would come back and sabotage the one and only thing that’s good for you, you would’ve snatched the keys to his van and locked yourself inside, throwing away the keys until he comes back.

By the time you ran out of things that reminded you of him, you pictured yourself regretfully harboring his love into permanent frames just to slip into your memories of him once more. That summer haunted the crevices of your mind like a dusty old paragraph fading into unrecognizable colors; barely even a photograph to look at. The summer of ‘86 ended like many summers before, yet you felt it in your heart that you would never find the courage to depart from it ever since.

I keep your picture

Upon the wall

It hides a nasty stain that's lying there

So, don't you ask me

To give it back

I know you know it doesn't mean that much to me

I'm not in love, no no, it's because...

The DnD session ended surprisingly successfully. Members older than Mike and Dustin were crying out of joy, while some applauded Erica Sinclair’s lucky draw, welcoming her officially early to the club. Your smile widened at the sight of her waving towards you in her cape, tiptoeing in the middle of the crowds to see you.

Before you start to walk towards her, you caught a glimpse of Eddie heading out the front door with keys in his hand and a black metal box. It wasn’t like you expected him to talk to you after the campaign, but at the same time you felt a pang of pain tugging at the strings of your heart. You’d rather curl up inside your bed and ugly-cry under a blanket for hours than see him leave like that. As you tucked your camera into its old leather case, a small folded yellow paper slipped from the bottom edges of the case, like someone purposefully sneaked it in there while you weren’t looking. You picked it up and opened the contents of the yellow piece of paper, secretly hoping that it was for you.

“Hey, it’s been a while. I don’t have the stomach to reconcile or anything, but Henderson asked me to be nice since you’re only taking pictures for the yearbook. It’s not like I wanted to bother you. I never even thought about it when you showed up with that camera you always bring around. Did your new, older boyfriend get that for you? Anyways, I’m pleased that you enjoyed the campaign tonight. It’s something I’ve specially crafted for weeks now. I guess all that hard work finally pays off when an outsider such as yourself finds it decent at best. Tell me when the photos arrive and keep an extra for me, will you? You always know where I am.” - Eddie.

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x y/n #stranger things smut #stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson smut #joseph quinn #stranger things fanfiction

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chaoticbardlady99 · 4 months

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Lethal Woman: Chapter 8 (Astarion x GN! Reader)

Synopsis: You and Astarion have many misadventures while going back through the Blighted Village. Someone from your past makes a gruesome reappearance and reveals they are hunting Astarion. You and Astarion inadvertently confess to each other that there is, in fact, something between the two of you.

CW: Violence, gore, fighting, alcohol, Gnome racism (I don’t hate Gnomes I promise- just Dwarves because the All Hammer killed one of my favorite DND characters), torture, mentions of emotional, psychological, and physical abuse.

Chapter 9

Likes, comments, and reblogs are greatly appreciated! Thank you for everyone who has been reading my little passion project!

Tracing your steps back through the blighted village was more eventful than any of you anticipated.

For one- you and Astarion stumbled upon an Ogre and Bug Bear couple (literally) bumping uglies. Astarion had insisted that he open it and you were really hoping it wasn’t what you thought it was. Considering your luck- you weren’t surprised they were fucking, but then they tried to kill you. So you had to ruin the party while the rest of your companions explored the other abandoned buildings while you and Astarion were trying to avoid being covered in various bodily fluids.

Second, Karlach informs you she befriended three massive ogres and they said they’ll send their aid when you “toot this little horn thing”. Then she gave you the news that they don’t promise NOT to eat you. You quickly convinced her to give it to you- you love your tiefling kindred spirit, but her impulse control is terrible sometimes.

Arguably the third incident may be the worst. Karlach had rejoined the other group when Wyll called her over so it was just the two of you again. You had attempted to help a deep Gnome by killing the Goblins that were terrorizing him- much to Astarion’s dismay.

Well, when the Gnome told you to stop the damn thing- you went inside thinking it would be one lever. It was TWO and they said what they each did IN COMMON. YOU CAN’T READ COMMON! And when you asked Astarion to pull the right lever- he had a mischievous look in his eyes.

“Consider the right level pulled, Darling.”

Needless to say, the only positive of that event was the hysterical cackling that erupted from your lover’s mouth as he fell to the ground- unable to contain himself until at least 10 minutes after the Gnome you promised to rescue became airborne and gained his Gnomeish wings. You had looked at Astarion and leered at him playfully.

“You are so mean,” you said while castigating him, trying not to let your love of his genuine laughter get in the way of basic morals, “that is not what I asked you to do at all!”

You are so glad no one else was around for that. Wyll would have stroked out.

“Oh Darling,” he said, wiping the tears from his eyes, “I never claimed not to be and next time- maybe be more specific instead of saying ‘can you pull the right lever?’’”

You sighed while pinching the bridge of your nose, now struggling to contain your laughter. Like the absolute shit he is- he found a loophole.

“Well as long as you aren’t tying me up to a windmill and flinging me into the heavens-“

You didn’t even get to end your sentence because Astarion began crying and laughing again.

Within an hour of the impromptu funeral, your situationship and the interests of the others in the group had been tested when you, Gale, Astarion, and Lae’zel found the Necromancy of Thay. You had accidentally stumbled across the room while searching the caverns underneath the Blighted Village and finding a strange purple amethyst. The book had immediately taken to it and you don’t know what Astarion had seen from the book, but he refused to back down and hand it to Gale.

“No!” Astarion says indignantly, “you aren’t eating this one!”

“I need it to stabilize-“

“I could give a rat’s ass about how stable your stupid chest orb is,” Astarion says while glaring, “this is far too special for the likes of you to consume.”

“It’s obviously a very powerful tome. It would be beneficial for helping my condition,” Gale huffs and then they both look at you.

Oh no.

“State your case?” You say awkwardly, “unbiasedly?”

They both scowl and Astarion pouts at you, but the look in his eyes tells you he understands to some extent that you at least have to let both parties argue their side. You did have a full blown melt down one of the first nights of the journey over not being able to make everyone happy. Astarion rarely put up a fight with you unless it was important to him. You do this with everyone, not just them, but you worry your relationship with Astarion will be seen as the influencing factor.

Gale simply stated that it had powerful magic that he would like to consume. You did mention that you have multiple items for him in your pocket at any given time, but he is still insistent.

Then Astarion makes his case and it’s actually very difficult to argue with it. It’s a book of Necromancy and he is undead. What if the book had a cure for his condition? Or at least a way to diminish the side effects? The desperation in his voice had somehow cracked Gale’s resolve- you didn’t even have to make a decision.

“Fineeeeeeeee,” Gale drawls, “have the damn book- you bastard.”

Astarion looks far too pleased with himself.

Asshole, you think with a smile.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

You set up camp at your previous campsite near the Grove so that you can begin your journey into the Underdark.

The sun has already set and the moon shines brightly in the sky. You aren’t ready to go underground yet. You always miss the moon and stars.

You are sitting by the nearby river- enjoying the sounds of the roaring river with Karlach as the two of you try to sort out her love life.

“Soooo,” you raise your eyebrows at her, “is it going to be Wyll, Damon, or Shadowheart?”

“Ughhhh,” Karlach tips over and pretends to writhe in pain in the grass, “having choices sucks!!”

“Oh come on K,” you say teasingly, “you must have someone you are specifically gravitating towards.”

Karlach taps her chin and pretends to think. After a minute- she just looks at you and shrugs.

“I’ve got nothing.”

“Nothing? You spend so much time with Shadowheart and Wyll! Dammon I’d maybe understand being out of the running but what the hell man!”

“I know, I know,” Karlach sighs, “I mean you had Gale and Halsin up your ass- why Astarion?”

You are almost frozen by her question. Why does everyone but you notice when people fancy you?

Why did you choose Astarion? You know the answer, but you also don’t know how to phrase it without sounding like an emotionally clingy weirdo.

“Um well,” you cough awkwardly, “I guess I just really like who he is as a person. I think he’s really funny, intelligent, and whether he wants to admit it or not- he is kind, in his own way.”

You neglect to tell Karlach about the Gnome. You have a feeling she won’t love that whole mess.

“The first night we hung out and just talked was… it was like when I met Tessa for the first time. It was an instant- oh no I’d do anything for this person.”

You hug your knees and put your chin on them. You scrunch up your face and avoid her face.

“You look rather upset for someone who is horribly smitten.”

“I’m not upset- it’s just weird… feeling this way again,” you sigh heavily, “I really am a walking death trap though-specifically where lovers go to die. I probably should end it, right? To keep him safe?”

“I would let him make that decision if you are so worried about it,” Karlach waves her hands at you dismissively, “you like him-I believe he likes you. Fangs can make his own choices- we all know the risk of traveling with you as you know the risk of traveling with us.”

“That’s a good point.”

“Of course it is! I’m a genius!”

You roll your eyes, “So who’s it gonna be Karlach?”

“DAMMIT!”

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The trek back to camp isn’t a long one, but you are ready to be in- well- a bed roll?

Astarion has found every excuse in the book to have you come and stay in his tent with him- except for just flat out asking you. It makes you quite giddy regardless.

One night he had even resorted to using the excuse that he needed your assistance and guidance in sharpening his throwing knives. You know what didn’t happen? Sharpening throwing knives.

The two of you had ended up tangled in each other’s embrace and talking until you eventually fell asleep. You woke up the next morning (entirely too early, the sun was barely rising) with him curled around you sleeping. You decided to go back to sleep- you weren’t ready to start your day. You’d rather stay here with Astarion.

You walk back to camp with a slight skip in your step- wondering if Astarion will want you to sleep in his tent with him again tonight. It had been a little less than a week since you had begun backtracking to the Underdark entrance and he had sought you out every night. You really REALLY hope he continues this trend.

Karlach is talking to you about the pros and cons of each partner- still entirely undecided- when you both hear a bone chilling cackle come from a tree in front of you. You both stop in your tracks immediately- Karlach reaches for the small blade she brought with her and you prepare your hidden daggers.

“Well if it isn’t good ole Corpse Eyes,” the mysterious woman says, “we thought you’d finally disappeared for good. Suppose we were wrong.”

You recognize the voice immediately as your fellow guild mate- Rinara. The two of you couldn’t stand each other. She wanted Dahlia to lavish her in all the attention and training she gave you- you just wanted to be left the fuck alone.

Rinara felt like you were a, “selfish fucking brat,” and had taken to calling you ‘Corpse Eyes’ because you had been entirely empty, rigid, and lifeless up until the last year. You were no better than a walking, mindless zombie to her.

Rinara steps around the corner and it takes every last bit of restraint you have not to let the horror show on your face.

Rinara was once a beautiful, almond haired half High Elf with a strong, healthy body. Now? Her skin is the color of Ash, her eyes are bloodlust red, her hair is coming out in clumps on her head, and her skin is peeling off like she has been sitting in an acid bath for a while now. Her left cheek is completely gone- revealing her teeth and gums.

“I was initially only here for the Spawn,” you feel your blood freeze as she smiles at you- all teeth and no light in her eyes, “but if Dahlia also had you…”

“You need to back the fuck off Rinara or-“

“Or what!? You’ll kill me?” She yells out hysterically, “I’m already fucking dead! You disappeared and so they sent fucking Dahlia to do your contract- a request from Obhark himself for the assassination of Lord Cazador Szarr.

“The woman struck a fucking deal with him- she’ll help get his prodigal son home and she’ll supply him with Deathbringers if she’ll be made his consort when he completes the ritual.

“I may not be able to control them,” she snarls, “but I do know that none of this would have happened if you hadn’t fucked off. This was supposed to be you! You are the one who should be tortured and violated! Not me! Not any of us!”

Huh, so your contract was to kill Cazador and because a Mindflayer kidnapped you- Dahlia took the contract and has gone rogue. How very convenient. This certainly tracks with the ridiculousness of the other circumstances you are dealing with. If it’s not devils, then it’s the Gith. If it’s not the gith- it’s some sadistic vampire. There is no winning in this group. Halsin is the only one that doesn’t seem to have an issue yet, but you are waiting for the other shoe to drop on that one.

That’s not important right now- knowing what the ritual is? That would be very valuable. You and Astarion have tried to figure out what the carvings into his back are and what they represent. You can read infernal so you know what it says, but it doesn’t make total sense.

Hoyc inferiu non iurare per igneu

Naec virba loquor

Eoai mundo muoat

This soul swears no oath by fire

Nor words does he speak

In the realm of death

You both has assumed it was just a way to prevent him from making contracts with devils to be free of Cazador, but now knowing there is a ‘ritual’ happening- you wonder if it’s an integral part of the ritual, the scars. If they are, then that means you are going to be doing some heavy duty bodyguard work- if Obarhk himself had requested it, then it must mean it’s not good.

Which also doesn’t surprise you given the circumstances.

“What ritual,” you say through clenched teeth.

Her smile is unsettling, “It’s a secret- all I know is that it’s going to make Master very very powerful.”

She looks at you with so much pain and anger. You are Dahlia’s favorite chew toy- you had been keeping her out of harm's way (unintentionally) this whole time and now that she has Dahlia’s attention- she seems to realize now why you didn’t want it in the first place.

Rinara looks borderline feral- you can see it now. Dahlia evidently doesn’t know how to complete the ritual or she used a different one entirely- that’s why Rinara is somewhere between a Deathbringer and a skeleton in the making. You bite back the bile as you watch a piece of her flesh roll off of her arms onto the ground below.

“She tricked all of us- requested every Assassins’ aid that was not a Deathbringer. Told us Obarkh is going to pick one of us for a special project based on our ‘performance,” she spits at the ground, “then she turned us into these things- only ten out of the hundred of us that went survived. Cazador’s blood and Dahlia’s black magic flows through my veins and I survived to tell the tale- I am rotting away. I wish I died.

“And now? I’m going to have a feast- at least I can enjoy one last full meal before I disappear completely,” she bares her canines at you, “I wonder how Half Drow tastes- maybe I should ask those pigs that ate your bitch mother.”

You don’t even have time to reply before Rinara is lunging at you and Karlach. You both deftly dodge the display of all consuming rage that Rinara throws into her movement.

Rinara has always been too blood thirsty to think logically during a fight and her recent transformation seems to have only made it worse- except now she’s stronger so she may be able to actually get some damage in- doubtful, but possible.

You and Karlach breakthrough the trees and you are barrelling towards camp. You are well-versed in unarmed hand to hand combat, but you can’t leave your life up to chance. You don’t know what Dahlia did to her, but it’s becoming clearer that it was not a Deathbringer ceremony that was performed. Her breathing behind you is ragged and rattling- the smell of her skin taints the air you breathe. She is here specifically for Astarion- you can’t afford to take any risk that could keep Rinara alive.

Everyone looks at you both in alarm as you grab your daggers from outside Lae’zel’s tent (she had offered to sharpen them and basically refused to let you say no). Karlach grabs her axe and yells frantically about some zombie woman who wants Astarion, but hates you and now she wants to consume you before taking Astarion back to Cazador. Oh and Dahlia is in on it too because apparently your disappearance had really caused some issues with a contract regarding killing the Vampire Lord.

You barely see the footsteps of the invisible person running up to you in time to dodge and you hear the scream of frustration rip through the air.

You make a wild guess regarding her location and throw a knife while she screams and cusses at you.

“I’ve been waiting to rip you piece by FUCKING piece since I met -“ she is cut off by a screech and revealing herself to your companions.

You had most definitely hit her- your blade stuck in her left eyeball. Rinara looks at you- significantly more pissed off than she was even a moment before-, rips out her eyeball using the throwing knife, discards it, and begins circling you.

Rinara is not bright and she lacks impulse control. She can remain in control for maybe only four or five minutes at a time- which would explain why hearing your voice is probably what set her off Astarion’s path. The chase bought you more time since Rinara loves a good hunt- you are almost positive you can break her down quickly and because she’ll be chasing a high, she’ll make stupid mistakes. Rinara also loves to talk and taunt her targets which infuriates you, but at least it’s a full proof trap for her.

“You don’t always need to be stronger than your opponents,” Dahlia says as she watches you get the shit kicked out of you by a hired mercenary, “you just need to be faster, smarter, and calm- let them dig their own grave.”

Your companions are clambering for their weapons and you send out a “don’t move” message telepathically. Astarion protests hit your brain like a wave- all you feel is fear. You tell him to trust you and you allow him to be privy to your thoughts and actions. You know exactly how quickly this will end after your next words and you don’t need her getting spooked.

“You know, Rinara, I’m not surprised Dahlia tricked you or that you were dense enough to drink Cazador’s blood- it certainly wouldn’t be the dumbest thing you’ve fallen for,” you smile at her, “I might actually feel sorry for you this time.”

You see your companions all staring at you as Rinara’s footsteps end just to the right of their line of sight. You can feel Astarion’s gaze burning into you and you have to focus hard on disconnecting. Embarrassment will not be helpful.

“What did you just say to me, you little wretch?”

“Oh sorry,” you clear your throat, “I SAID- I THINK YOU ARE REALLY REALLY FUCKING DUMB AND I’M NOT SURPRISED YOU GOT DOOPED.”

The sound of Astarion’s laughter fills your head- you fight to stop the smile that is threatening to cross your lips. The rage bristling off of her is so wonderful. You feel a dopamine rush over the way her teeth are chattering in anger, the way her eyes are paranoid and unfocused as she looks at you. You have gotten under her skin and now it’s your turn to be the predator.

“I’m going to enjoy bringing your skeleton back to Dahlia after I pick you clean,” she roars, “I’m going to enjoy watching that stupid Spawn finally fulfill his-“

“Do you ever shut up or ?” You ask, snorts and laughter coming from your companions, “I feel like I left that at a really good spot and we should just move forward or whatever?”

Oh the look of embarrassment, shame, and fury on her face- how you wish Lucia could have seen it. She could not stand Rinara and the way her face twists with the sour emotions is a wonderful sight to behold.

“I’ve changed my mind. I won’t eat you, I’ll just bring you back to Dahlia like the fucking disobedient thing you are! You” she spits, “are nothing, but a walking Corpse. You should have stayed dead- I liked you better that way. If Dahlia can do it once- I’m sure she’ll love doing it again. You’ll be tolerable and compliant soon enough.”

The cackle that leaves your lips surprises you.

“You always have been so fucking stupid, Rinara,” you hiss, “if you want Dahlia to love you so fucking bad you can have her. The price of her ‘love’ is hardly worth it- the woman is madder than that weird old guy next to brothel on 8th.”

“YOU ARE UNGRATEFUL!” Rinara screeches, “I WILL TEACH YOU A LESSON!”

You could not roll your eyes further back into your head. It should be easier to leave the Nightmasks. The idiocy is putting years on your immortal life.

“Doubtful, but you are welcome to try.”

Rinara lunges fast, but you are definitely faster. You imagine having intact skin helps. Rinara is hitting you with attack after attack and you just focus on dodging, getting in close for a quick hit, then back to dodging. She is the one dying, not you- let her do all the hard work.

Whatever spell Dahlia used did not promote Stamina or basic hygiene- unfortunately. Rinara is breathing hard and is already losing power in her hits.

This goes on for a couple minutes before Rinara does what she always does- lifting up her back foot ever so slightly so that she can extend her blade farther. You don’t know how many times you have to trip her for this mistake before she realizes she’s her own worst enemy.

You move out of the way and use her momentum- with a swift kick of your foot- Rinara went skidding across the dirt. Her blade is stuck in the ground near you almost perfectly upright. You walk over to it and you push it even further into the ground then stand directly in front of it, cutting off her line of sight to it.

“If you want your cheap ass sword back- come get it.”

It’s actually a very expensive sword and Rinara is very very defensive about it.

“YOU-“

Rinara doesn’t even allow herself to finish her sentence before she flings a massive bolt of lightning your way. Your companions are screaming as you run towards the lightning, but you know what you are doing. You dive just below the electric crackling in the air and roll back onto your feet. You watch as Rinara turns to you before she catches the blue bolt coming back towards her.

You didn’t always like to use your enemies weapons for their intended purposes, but when in need of a reflective surface- you can never go wrong with a sword.

Rinara goes flying towards the campfire- the smell of rotting burnt flesh fills your nose as she cries out in pain with every spark of lightning that jolts through her.

You take your time to walk back to the campfire, walking over with her sword in hand, and look through your pack- of course you left your Holy Water at home. At least you have wine- you pop it open and begin to drink. Rinara is still writhing on the ground and her flesh is even worse off than it was before. This really isn’t your favorite way to spend any evening- killing your formal frenemy because there is no rehabbing this version of her. It is all the worst of Rinara and then some.

You sigh heavily and walk over to her. You cock your head at her, leaning on her sword for support, and take another long sip of the wine. Rinara’s irritation is growing, but her body is practically in tatters now. She lashes out at you with clawed hands- you meet both of her wrists with her own sword- deftly cleaving them off her. The mortified scream that leaves Rinara’s mouth as she begins trying to back away from you. You smile at her with your vampiric stare- intensifying Rinara’s growing fear.

“Dahlia did a shit job training you. Didn’t she tell you the rules ? Use it and you lose it,” you take another swig.

“Hells Soldier!”

“Hey-“ you take an even bigger sip, “I’ve been waiting to take this one out back and put her out of her misery for five years. She’s obsessed with Dahlia of all fucking people and so she terrorizes me by interfering with my contracts! I will be enjoying my moment- thank you very much.”

“That’s not what I meant- you ‘use it, you lose it?’ That can’t possibly-“

You roll up your sleeves and the silence around the campfire is deafening as everyone stares- you should have probably not done that.

Blunt, deep lines around your wrist, old and faded into the skin. There are similar markings on your elbows right at your elbows.

“The reversal process involves blood magic and necromancy- if you were wondering. Oh and yes it does hurt, yes I have more, and no I won’t be talking about it.”

Rinara kicks you weakly- your shoulders slump. Is she serious right now? Consistency is key so off goes the foot. Rinara’s pained wailing echoes in the air.

One last giant swig and you feel less freaked out and embarrassed by your sudden onslaught of bravado. You hold out the bottle to Astarion who happily takes it and begins to drink from it- you can feel his eyes melting your skin and you are almost afraid to see the emotions in them.

You grab Rinara by the back of her collar and her wriggling barely stops you from being able to easily drag her along the forest floor all the way back to the river. Hopefully she’s close to the same concept as a vampire, but also Rinara can’t swim.

“Well my dumb friend,” you say with a snort, “this is where we part ways- permanently. I hope the fish like their dinner and you’ll stop talking so Goddamn much in fights during battles. This was way too much work for how fucking weak you are.”

Rinara is screaming and kicking. You let her go and walk about five feet in front of her- putting her between yourself and the river. You wave and smile like you are saying goodbye to a loved relative- followed with a middle finger.

You use a simple Push cantrip and watch with a sort of sick satisfaction as Rinara begins to burn up, steam coming up from the water as she is dragged away by the current.

“Well Roo, I would say that may be some of your finest work yet,” you say, giving yourself a pat on the back.

You turn around and see all of your companions. You suddenly feel ill and self-conscious. Wyll looks slightly horrified, Halsin is just unreadable, Karlach is giving you a thumbs up like it’s your first day of school, Shadowheart is nodding her head impressed, Gale is shocked, and Lae’zel is slowly clapping.

Astarion though? He’s looking at you with a mixture of gratitude, warmth, and pride. You try your best to avoid his gaze as you put your hand on your hip and lift an eyebrow at them. You might actually keel over from adoration if you look at him.

“What are you guys even doing? Good Gods you people are far too supportive and clingy,” you say trying to hide your smile and then look at Gale, “don’t you have something cooking?”

“SHIT!”

All of your companions turn around to leave, but Astarion begins to walk towards you and you feel like your heart might explode in your chest. You see Karlach celebrate behind him- giving you a thumbs up again and you shake your head at her.

You just fought a woman and barely broke a sweat, but the minute he even looks at you- you feel like your whole body is on fire. Strong hands, grab you by the hips and pull you into his chest before he then moves them to your face. Astarion cups your face in his hands and is looking in your eyes.

“You are a sight to behold, Darling,” he says breathlessly, “that was the most beautiful display of violence I’ve ever seen.”

“ I- uh,” you choke back the surprise, “just another day… on the job?”

“Oh well, let me thank you for your wonderful work then.”

“You don’t need to-“

Astarion presses his lips to yours and swallows up the words you were going to say. The kiss is rough, but slow and needy- hungry even. It makes you feel like he is yearning for you- worshiping you in a temple.

When you pull back for air, you see how his eyes are blown wide with lust and another emotion you can’t quite decipher- it’s positive, but also a little fearful.

“Stay with me?” He asks, his voice uncharacteristically shy, “in my tent?”

“Tonight?”

“Yes,” he pauses before saying quietly, “and every night after that too- if you want.”

You let a huge smile spread across your face and his nervous expression appears to melt away almost instantly. You step back from him and curtsy.

“I, a simple camp urchin, would be honored to stay in your tent with you, Lord Acunin,” you say teasingly.

Astarion rolls his eyes with a lopsided smile, but puts his arm out to you. You loop your arm through his as if you are two normal nobles courting each other.

“First we must feed you, my Lady,” Astarion states in an overly proper tone, you giggle and you see the corners of his mouth twitch further at the sound, “I must make sure my lover is well taken care of after all.”

You are hot from head to toe and Astarion absolutely has to notice. If he does, he doesn’t say anything, but you hope he hears how alive he makes your heart sound.

*************************************

“Never have I ever…” Gale says, “worked for a Devil.”

Astarion watches as Karlach and Wyll begrudgingly take a large sip of their choice of liquor. You are leaning your head on Astarion’s shoulder- the alcohol making you slightly more affectionate in public. Astarion would be lying if he said it didn’t give him a thrill to be this close to you- even if PDA might not be his thing.

“Never have I ever- been a vampire,” Karlach says slyly.

Both you and Astarion grumble- taking a shot.

“Never have I ever,” Shadowheart says, tapping her finger on her knee , “lit a building on fire.”

Every single one of you but Halsin takes a shot. Shadowheart giggles and then also takes a shot.

“Shadowheart,” Karlach says and looks at her with confusion, “you aren’t supposed to drink if you haven’t done it?”

“Oh no- I have,” Shadowheart slurs, “I just wanted another shot and couldn’t think of anything else.”

Karlach begins to chastise Shadowheart playfully- commenting on how she is already way too messed up and Shadowheart saying, “I am a CLERIC I can cure my own hangovers!”

Everybody chuckles and returns to the game- it’s Wyll’s turn. Wyll regards you and cocks an eyebrow.

“Hmmmmm…. Never have I ever killed a Liche.”

You snort and take a shot.

“NO!” Wyll exclaims, “I thought I had you that time.”

“Mhmmmmm,” you hum in acknowledgement, “I think I was- 15?”

Wyll is sitting on the edge of his seat- actually everyone is. Astarion watches you squirm in recognization that everyone wants to hear your story.

“Oh it was just a complete accident,” you say with a fake enthusiasm, “I was exploring a nearby temple during a contract and just happened to run into one.”

Everyone bought the story- Wyll comments that you have terrible luck which you laugh at. He has no idea.

Astarion already knows this story- Dahlia had dragged your halfway dead body all the way into an abandoned castle off the coast of the Sea of Stars, resurrected you, and then shackled your feet and hands together. She later hid the key for the shackles somewhere in the castle for you to find.

It was an exercise- a sadistic one. You had pissed her off the night before because you had refused to let you cut your hair. She had cut it all off, every last inch, after she had beaten you into submission by quite literally killing you. This was the second part of your punishment.

She told you that there is a Lich hiding in the castle and her expectations of you were high- you are not to receive even a single scratch and the Lich needed to be dead. The punishment for not meeting these expectations? You would go without eating for a week and you would be locked away in the basement- not allowed to leave or see Tessa. You killed the lich, but you were horrifically mauled in the process because you couldn’t find the key. It was a long week in that dark, cold, horrible basement. Dahlia had also hired Abdirak to reinforce how horribly you fucked up.

Astarion absentmindedly puts his hand on yours and gives it a reassuring squeeze- trying to disrupt the spiral you’re evidently about to go into. You look over at him and Astarion feels like he could melt. You look at him with so much gratitude and as if he is the most important person who has ever walked this earth. Gods he has really really fucked up his plan.

The game has continued to go on without the two of you and suddenly everyone is staring at you both.

“Did you both not hear the question?” Karlach snorts while wiggling her eyebrows.

You both look at each other and you laugh awkwardly before turning back to Karlach.

“Repeat?”

“Never have I ever felt romantically towards any form of vampire,” Wyll states, “Gale, Lae’zel, and Shadowheart have had their shots already- so now we are just waiting on you two.”

Astarion doesn’t even have to think about it- which could partially be because of how intoxicated he currently is- obviously he is taking a shot.

He pours some more alcohol in yours and his glasses- then looks at you. This is about when his drunk mind realizes that he is basically stating, “I like you, but do you like me?” With his actions and that there is still the possibility that you could reject him. He did fling a Gnome you were trying to save into the air today- not the most attractive thing a person can do. (It was kind of worth it though).

“Cheers?” He says with a smirk on his face- hoping his eyes don’t reflect how nervous he feels.

You squint your eyes at him playfully before clinking the glass, “Cheers.”

Karlach claps her hands excitedly and Wyll’s eyes are sparkling while he looks at her. Shadowheart also smiles widely at the display of support.

You and Astarion have been speculating who Karlach is going to end up with for days now- Dammon is still a possibility, but you both have decided that it’s least likely. Astarion thinks Shadowheart and you think it will be Wyll. There’s 100 gold on the line for whoever wins. If it ends up being Dammon though? Well you will both drink and commiserate together about how blind you had both been.

It’s your turn now and you look directly at Astarion, he isn’t sure how he feels about the mischievous glint in your eyes. Then you say your sentence out loud and he feels a laugh bubble up from his lungs.

“Never have I ever flung a Deep Gnome from a windmill.”

Astarion falls off the log- laughing just as hard as he had done earlier- as you regale the group with the story. Gods it had been such a wonderful experience- the look on your face had been priceless. He also silently appreciated that you were far more impressed with his loophole than upset about his actions.

The goodies of the group castigate him, but they are all laughing equally as hard as the both of you are. You paint a very vivid picture using hand gestures and words that Astarion has been teaching you in common to describe things. He relishes in how lovely and lively you are- Alcohol is such a wonderful thing. He can just enjoy you without that horrible nagging in his head that even being involved with you anymore is a bad idea.

When Astarion finally finishes laughing- he happily takes another shot.

#baldurs gate 3 #astarion #astarion x reader #baldurs gate astarion #astarion x you #bg3 spoilers #astarion romance #astarion x tav #bg3 #karlach #astarion ancunin #vampire #Halsin #Wyll #gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep

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waltwhitmansbeard · 5 days

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so i just read a post explaining why the op (and, according to the op, a lot of other people, even tho the post in question only had 32 notes, some of which were from people who disagreed with them) didn't like the cut to the crown keepers in last week's episode. while i'm totally on board with people not jibing with stuff that just doesn't work for them, i wanted offer some reasons why this seemingly hard pivot to people who are not the main characters of the story being told was a good decision to make (note good decision, not inherently the best decision, which i believe no one, including the dm, at a ttrpg table should ever be expected to make).

matt had an extremely powerful, extremely unexpected character decision dropped in his lap in the final moments of the previous episode. we don't know exactly how much time matt has between recordings, maybe a full week, maybe not, but either way, there's a very real chance that matt just did not have enough time to fully prepare a session to deal with fcg's death and what comes next.

sam now has to create a new character that a) is of a level with the rest of the party and b) makes narrative sense for him to be there. that takes time for both him and matt, and they might just need some space to work on that. when laudna died, marisha was willing to sit away from the table for several weeks because she knew that she wanted laudna to be resurrected, but sam may not want the same thing, and that's okay!

matt may want to fold the crown keepers into his main story, some or all of them—particularly dorian, whom both liam and the fans have been asking to return for a while now. dorian is clearly important to orym and the story that liam is trying to tell, and bringing the crown keepers in may be matt's way to do that.

matt—and dms generally—has always had to straddle a very fine line of making sure that his players are the main characters of their story who feel like their actions have real consequences and effects on the world, while also understanding that in reality, it doesn't make sense for half a dozen chucklefucks to have such an outsized effect on major cosmological goings-on like *checks notes* the potential release of a god-eater. this becomes especially true when you're on your third campaign set in the same world, and your players' previous ultra-powerful pcs are still around and definitely more adept and connected than their current pcs are. i, personally, think matt does a great job at walking that line, and one of the things he does that i appreciate is that he doesn't shy away from the fact that a) his players are powerful but not the most powerful and b) his players aren't the only one who care about what's going on in the world and who are taking actions to effect change. the current plotline re: ruidus is absolutely world-shaking and is causing all the divine girlies to cower in their demiplanes, so of course even the evil ones are going to be calling on their champions to help out. it makes more sense for opal to be involved (which, btw, matt has been hinting at for a while now) than not.

matt might need a fucking break! he's been doing this consistently for nine years now, and shit is complicated! handing over the reins to aabria for a week or two or three may be what he needs to not get burnt out.

dnd is an emotional game, and the entire cast might have been rocked hard by fcg's death. some space away for a week or two could help them process and regroup to get back into a story that is otherwise very stressful and action-packed.

or it's none of these! what do i know! i'm a random idiot on the internet! matt doesn't consult me on these matters! (though my dms are open if he wants to chat, i do have ideas)

i think it's tempting to think of the decisions made in and around critical role (or any ttrpg show) like those made for a television series, because the episodes are serialized and we love them so much. but this show is, first and foremost, a group of friends playing a game together, and not a carefully constructed narrative with the primary goal of entertaining an audience. the audience always has been and, frankly, always should be second to the wishes and fun of the people around that table. matt would not have asked aabria to step in and dm a crown keepers side arc if he didn't think it was a good decision for him and his players, and that priority is the correct one. we are being invited in to watch these friends have fun together, and that's a privilege that we're super lucky to have. as long as the cr story isn't doing things that are outright abusive or harmful to the cast or the audience, i don't think we should begrudge them the choices they make in the name of their own game.

again, it's okay if you're not vibing with the crown keepers! i didn't love the aeor arc of c2! not everything is for everyone! but i think accusing matt and the cast of narrative malfeasance is a bit much when, tbqh, they don't answer to us. they answer to each other.

#me #critical role #cr meta

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sevendeadlyheadcanons · 15 days

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I may get into the ask box or I may disappear for another 4 years.

but for now

The Seven Deadly Dungeons and Dragons

I don’t play DND but my girlfriend does and she’s sitting next to me so let’s go

-In this AU they’re all normal humans who just get together and play DND sometimes.

-Merlin is the DM.

-Merlin sits for hours writing all sorts of lore and intricate backstories only for them to commit their classic chaotic shenanigans and screw with all her plans. Luckily, she’s good at thinking on the fly.

-Meliodas plays as a halfling paladin from a noble background. His character’s goal is to get information and find his brother.

-Diane plays as a half elf barbarian (my gf thinks this is contradictory but in a fun way) (“she’s too pretty to be a half orc 🥺”)

-Her goal is to find her sisters murderer and bring them to justice.

-Ban would play a tiefling rogue. His goal is to revive his dead lover (Elaine is alive but she thinks DND is ‘nerd shit’ so she just stays at their home. sometimes she’ll come and watch them though)

-King would play a gnome cleric. He is from the fae realm however it recently got raided and he is seeking revenge from the perpetrators.

-Gowther would play as an automaton wizard. His goal is to find out what happened to his creator and gain a heart.

-Escanor would play as a half orc barbarian (when he rages it’s like his daytime form when he’s normal it’s his nightform)

-His goal is simply to find friends who don’t think he’s strange and he simply goes along with the gang because he feels accepted.

-Elizabeth would play as a aasimar cleric. Her character writes stories and is going on the adventure simply to find inspiration.

-They all gather together and play in Escanor’s basement. He makes a little food spread. They don’t appreciate him enough honestly.

-Escanor and King are chronic note takers. They have notebooks full of the lore.

-Diane also writes notes but she writes them aesthetically like

Liones is the country we live in

and highlights it in pastel. She never writes down useful information and spells everything wrong. King usually helps her with his notes.

-Ban forgets everything lore wise and all of his abilities. He never knows when he can use sneak attack and keeps getting in trouble for trying to pick pocket his party.

-“I just think it’d be funny if he wasn’t actually a good rogue because he’s so big”

-Gowther would keep getting the party in trouble by using dunamancy on random NPCs. Merlin is sick of his shit and having to rewrite the plot of her campaigns.

-Meliodas always has weirdly good roles. They have investigated whether his dice are rigged and they’re not he’s just crazy lucky.

-Elizabeth would put a lot of thought into her characters backstory and motives. She would have a very thought out lore.

-Hawk is Escanor’s cat that they all loved so much that they put him in the game as a pig that can eat ranged attacks if a 20 is rolled and also is immune to poison

-Gowther tries to romance every npc. He rolls nat 20 for every persuasion check and Merlin has to let him have the most rizz in game.

-The party all met in the Boar Hat and decided to help each other reach their goals.

-In this canon the Boar Hat can also move. Meliodas has a spell that can create the Boar Hat to be constructed infront of him.

-They all met in real life because Merlin works with Escanor and they got talking about it and she was like “Hold up let me bring my friend Gowther” and then Gowther invited Meliodas who then invited his girlfriend Elizabeth and best friend Ban and then Ban was like “Hold up we need this dude too” and invited King and King’s girlfriend was like “Omg i wanna join” yeah

-King would paint a lot of miniatures

-Elizabeth would be a dice fiend. She would have so many dice and a cute bag for them.

-Meliodas and Ban both use the same pair of black dice that have chipped paint. They just pull these crusty dice from their pockets. The numbers are barely legible anymore.

-Merlin makes her own dice out of resin and sells them on etsy.

#merlin nnt #gowther nnt #meliodas nnt #ban nnt #elizabeth nnt #king nnt #diane nnt #escanor nnt #nanatsu no taizai #the seven deadly sins #headcanons

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littlemissaddict · 2 months

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Just a little psa I know nothing about dnd other that what I've seen in the show and what Google can tell me, if I'm wrong about something either politely correct me or just ignore the mistake please 🙏

Anyway, I'm just thinking about reader who despite being with Eddie and listening to him talk about dnd for years doesn’t have a clue about any of it so when she asks him if she can make a character and for him to teach her how to play he would be over the moon but also in despair about how little she knows (even Steve knows more about the game from just listening to the kids harp on about it)

"Oh can I be a Bandit?" She cries excitedly as Eddie sits down next to her with a blank character sheet.

"Bandit?" He asks, confused, running through the different classes in his head before realisation sets in, "Rogue? Do you mean rogue?" He asks with a hint of amusement in his tone that she misses as she nods quickly with a wide smile on her face.

"I don't know princess, rogues are known for being stealthy and have an uncanny ability to avoid danger whereas you, on the other hand, are possibly the clumsiest person I have ever met," he teases as her brow furrows and her bottom lip juts out in a pout as if she thinks the answer is going to be a no, as if Eddie would ever deny her. "Though you are good at finding out people's weaknesses and exploiting them so I guess you may make a good rogue after all" he jokes, knowing that she know that his only weakness is her and that he'll cave to her every time.

"Oh and can I have an eye patch too?" She asks hopefully.

"I mean if you want too but why would you need" he starts to ask before she cuts him off.

"So that I'm always ready to see in the dark if I need to" she states as if it obvious as to why she'd want one. "Did you know that's why pirates used to wear them so that when they'd come out of the bright sun they could just switch the patch over and the eye would already be accustomed to the dark meaning they wouldn't be fumbling about in the dark" she tells him proudly.

"I mean it makes sense, but how do you even know that?" He asks surprised but also not surprised at her knowledge of random information.

She shrugs, "I like to read, in fact my brain is full of useless information"

"Yeah, okay hit me with some" Eddie smiles, dropping his pen and turning so that she has his full attention.

"Did you know a cat ear contains 32 muscles? Or that alligators can stick their tongue out but crocodiles can't" she tells him and he shakes his head in response, truth be told its not something he's ever cared to look up. "And, a little controversially, if you added up all the time people spent kissing then it would roughly work out at about two weeks of their lifetime" she adds knowing that that maybe more to Eddie's interest.

"Oh is that so?" He smirks, elbow coming to rest on the table and his chin resting on his hand as he leans towards her, "I think we can beat that don't you?" He teases, eyes not leaving her almost as if he's challenging her, though they both know it's a challenge they'd both take willingly.

"Hmm I bet we could" she agrees, "and we can make a start on it after we complete my character sheet" she smiles innocently pushing him back slightly from where he'd seemingly leaned in even closer.

"Okay, okay but it is going to put us behind" he jokes reaching for the pen again as they prepare to begin brainstorming.

#eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson drabble #eddie munson blurb #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson #stranger things #stranger things fanfiction

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topbanana-art · 5 months

Text

Finally making an OC info post- by no means is this all of them, just ones that are most active and/or live in my head rent free.

First up- Rhys (DnD 5e - Rime of the Frostmaiden)

20 years Old, Half Orc, Half Elf (sweet baby angel) , He/Him

Fighter- Echo Knight

Absolute Ray of Sunshine; Rhys is from Icewind Dale; more specifically the Nomadic Reghed Tribe of the Elk.

He's unfamiliar with the outside world and even includes settlements in his own country

He's a Himbo basically a big dog.

This campaign lead him to leaving his tribe for the first time after an unfortunate accident which turned him into a small 'painted child' and searching for his missing sister. (both these are sorted now!)

*Rhys found an old oil painting of this child, blacked out and next thing he knew he was that small elf child. Her skin and clothing having the texture of painted canvas, and bleeds paint.

For a good chunk of the campaign he was just a totally normal elf- whose shadow didn't match with the body

---

Dhalas (DnD 5e Annalor)

36 Years Old, They/Him, Triton

Drunken Master Monk

Chill surfer dude vibes

Part of a travelling circus, They're a balancing act

Extremely laid back, Dhalas talks like they fight- dancing around, seemingly without rhyme or reason and occasionally clumsy.

---

Foxglove (BG3)

138 Years old (tweaked her age a lil), She/They, Drow

Arcane Trickster Rogue

Guild Artisan Background- Locksmith & Apprentice Finesmith

Chill and sassy, that Tav who talks their way out of shit.

Skews Towards Chaotic Good

Presents Androgynous most of the time

Must lockpick everything- she's not actually super interested what's inside, she just wants to see the workmanship of the locks and trashtalk how bad they are.

Yeah she's smooching the vampire. (and Halsin)

Naturally cares for others, even at the cost of her own wellbeing.

Has a Phobia of anything touching/going near her eyes- so the start of the game is A Time for Fox.

---

Arslan Dhoro (FFXIV)

21 Years Old (as of ARR), He/Them

Xaela AuRa

Dragoon - White Mage Main (All healer classes tbh)

Stoic, Resting Angry Face Himbo

He struggles to show emotion but he's just pretty shy and cautious about opening up to others.

From the Azim Steppe, he left in his early teens with his father after the death of his mother, to explore the world beyond the Steppe.

His Father Died in his late teens, attacked in Coerthas thinking he and Arslan were Dravanians.

He's extremely soft and protective for the Scions/his friends

---

Shiv (DnD 5e Saltmarsh- campaign completed)

Awful, terrible lesbian

68 years old, She/Her, Halfling

Celestial Warlock - Unicorn Patron w/ a Baby Phoenix familiar, Toby

A piece of shit. Is an absolute asshole and wont let you know she cares.

Lowkey magical girl

Ex-smuggler, who's patron is literally 'I can fix her', 'she can be a better person'. Part of the 'Beyond Skeletons' Pirate crew, she's the medic of the crew.

---

Pymmyr Tathnel (DnD 5e)

Pym

85 Years Old, He/They, Drow

Gloomstalker Ranger

Emotional Support Blink Dog, Princess Liquorice

This boy is scared all the time

Doesn't talk much, but speaks in a soft voice

Has disordered 'Sleeping' and Eating :)

His plague mask has tinted lenses to help ease the strain with how bright the surface is

I wont tell too much about them as a lot of their info is spoilers to other players. But this sad Drow just rocks up in my head on the regular.

---

Erebus (Anima Beyond Fantasy)

AKA- My first TTRPG character! circa 2011-2 I think???

Real name Sho Yoshimitsu

22 Years Old, He/Him

Duk'Zarist Nephilim

Assassin

Textbook 'strong silent and intimidating hot man'

But basically a big soft boy if you break past the mile thick ice

Tragic backstory™ , used to using his body for the job

He really enjoys cooking!

Also hopelessly in love with a small soft summoner, Caelum (the one hugging him), They're RedxBlue gays

---

I think I'll leave it there for now!

I may add more later, I hope it was interesting?? and I'm still pretty shy with yelling this much about my characters haha.

Thanks for reading if you made it this far! 💜

#gees ocs #oc info #oc art #my ocs #bg3 tav #ffxiv warrior of light #dnd character #sketchbook #my characters #art

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coreene · 24 days

Text

The 5e Guide to Sex

I have been made aware of an unofficial guide for sex in dnd universe by my lovely friends over at the Zhentil Keep. And I would like to share some interesting stuff I found in said book with my dear followes.

Technical details before the fun part: book is called The 5e Guide to Sex. I couldn't find a writer. I couldn't find a publisher. When you search the name Google throws the pdf your way in case anyone of you would like to check it out yourselves. If you know more about the book, please let me know and I'll update/throw a link for credits. I am adding these to my que and in pieces so they will be dropping at the same time for the next couple of days/nights.

The Dirty Deed

Transcript is under the cut

You can have sex for a number of minutes equal to your Constitution score minus 5. Since most humans have a Constitution of 10, this means that on average they last 5 minutes in bed. This refers only to the act of sex itself, not to any foreplay (see below).

At the end of sex, you make a satisfaction check by rolling a d20 and adding the number of minutes that the sex lasted for above 5 minutes (+1 for six minutes, +2 for seven minutes, and so on). If the result is equal to or greater than your partner’s Constitution score, then your partner was satisfied. If not, then your partner was dissatisfied and may desire to continue having sex until brought to satisfaction.

If having sex with more than one NPC, you make a separate satisfaction check for each one.

Satisfied or Dissatisfied. An NPC who has been satisfied with sex is likely to be friendly to you in the future, though there is no mechanical benefit. Likewise, a partner who you fail to satisfy might be unfriendly, but again there is no mechanical distinction drawn.

Very Dissatisfied. If you fail a Satisfaction check by 5 or more, then the NPC was very dissatisfied. Their sexual partner has disadvantage on all Persuasion checks made against them for the next 1d4+1 days.

Very Satisfied. If you pass a Satisfaction check by 5 or more, then the NPC was very satisfied. Their sexual partner has advantage on all Persuasion checks against them for the next 1d4+1 days.

Marathon. At the end of an act of sex, you can choose to forgo making a satisfaction check. If you do, you have sex for another length of time equal to your Constitution score minus 5. You may repeat this any number of times. Once you decide to stop forgoing the satisfaction check, you add the total amount of minutes above 5 minutes for each act of sex and add that result to your d20 roll.

Keeping going like this is exhausting, however. Each character having sex must make a DC 15 Constitution saving throw for each act of sex in an hour after the first; on a failure, the character gains a level of exhaustion.

Size Issues. If your sexual partner is two or more size categories larger or smaller than you, you have disadvantage on checks to satisfy them. Further, it is impossible for a male creature to physically penetrate a creature that is two size categories or more smaller than him without also causing great damage (1d4 bludgeoning damage per round of sex for each step of size category difference), and even creatures one size category smaller than them are at risk – for each minute of penetrative sex a larger male has with a smaller creature, that creature must make a DC 15 Constitution saving throw or gain 1 level of exhaustion.

Technical Details

The following applies to any creature while he or she is having sex:

You are grappled while having sex. Depending on how you are having sex, you may additionally be prone, restrained, or both. You can escape sex like you would any other grapple; your partner(s) can choose to not contest your escape attempt if they also wish to stop having sex.

You can’t concentrate on spells while having sex, unless the spell is being used directly for sex (such as the sexual application of Evard’s black tentacles, as described later in this document)

source: The 5e Guide to Sex (unofficial)

#the 5e guide to sex #Forgotten Realms #dnd #dnd lore #dungeons and dragons #d&d #dungeons & dragons #this is from an unofficial book - dont take it as canon #queue

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fantasy-things-and-such · 1 month

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Writeblr intro

Hi. hello. thought I should do one of these, so Here goes nothing!

About Me: You can call me Enju(They/them). I am a hopeful novice writer who is also new to Tumblr. I like to do a bit of poetry, but my main area of expertise is worldbuilding and character backstories. I'm quite nervous at the prospect of putting myself out there, but it's worth a shot, I suppose.

I'm currently writing a first-person Romantasy novel. It's YA, high fantasy(for now) and I'm about ~15k words in actual writing, scattered across various parts of the book, but the plan is to finish the rough draft for chapter one by the end of the month, and then move on to a more general rough draft.

My original outlet for my fantasy shenanigans was DnD, but since my group fell apart, I turned to the next best thing: novel writing! so, it's very disorganized, and, like the Forever DM that i am, I will inevitably retcon myself somehow. don't worry! I am an expert at fixing my own mistakes(I said calmly). Fantasy has always been a great creative outlet because there's a lot of room for fun and unique ideas. I'm looking for other authors and friends to talk with, not just to discuss cool writing ideas and stuff, but also for feedback. feedback is great and I desperately need more of it. I'm interested in writing many genres and I love to hear about how other people write, too.

Random Facts about myself:

I am a gamer. video games and board games alike. My favorite video game is currently Diablo IV and my favorite Board game is Twilight Imperium, Fourth Edition.

I have ADHD.

I have a KitKat addiction.

Tea enjoyer

love music. favorite artist: Mili(the "to kill a living book" album is great)

i've been writing for almost five years now

My WIP, Sunset, is about a woman named Lilliwiess who enters a prestigious knight's academy to follow in her eldest sister's footsteps and follows her through a journey of love, mystery, discovery, and death as she and her squad search for answers to questions that no one seems to ask. or something like that.

It's most likely too early to even be writing a "chapter one", but the basics are down. The level of Fantasy is currently being worked on(might go from High to Mid Fantasy; who knows).

Lastly, feel free to tag me in tag games or interactions, or to just ask me any questions. I'm open to DM's, too(though I may not respond straight away. I do my best.) I also love seeing OCs and WIPs (writing and drawings). big art fan. Thanks for sticking around and happy writing!

#writing #writers on tumblr #writeblr intro #writerscommunity #creative writing #intro post

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positivelybeastly · 2 months

Note

Can I ask about your bg3 Hank? What’s his class, who’s his guardian? Durge or no? Any romances?

You absolutely may ask about my Baldur's Gate 3 character who may or may not be Hank McCoy!

This is my most recent screenshot of him!

I have literally just finished Act 1, so please no spoilers, but at current, he is:

A Level 5 Bard in the College of Swords, with a Level 2 multi-class into Monk! I figured this made the most sense as a translation for Hank's high intellect and martial prowess while still maintaining a more pacifistic outlook - it also means he gets just as many funny answers in dialogue as he does wise ones.

A Half-Orc! This accounts for his incredibly cute tusks. The yellow eye make-up is meant to evoke his feline form's yellow eyes and give him a more striking look. The earrings are a holdover from Dark Beast, who has very similar rings in his art.

STR: 10 DEX: 14 CON: 12 INT: 14 WIS: 13 CHA: 16. These aren't necessarily what I think Hank's DnD stats would be, but frankly, Hank doesn't really have a dump stat, he'd be, like, 18-20 in everything, and you miss out on fun feats by doing that.

Currently wearing Gloves of Dexterity, setting his DEX to 18!

Currently wearing Warped Headband of Intellect, setting his INT to 17!

Not going Dark Urge for Hank. Doesn't feel like it'd fit - but I definitely plan on doing at least one other playthrough. I might do it as Dark Beast, who would definitely qualify - he might be a Rogue/Druid or something of that type? I know I want to mess with Druid at some point.

I actually didn't take any pictures of his Dream Visitor/guardian. Oops. Next time they appear in a cutscene, I will make sure to take caps!

Romances? Oh, hell yes. At the moment, I'm romancing Shadowheart, but flirting heavily with Halsin, since it's my understanding you can go poly with those two, and . . . honestly, I really like them both. Halsin's got the big daddy elf thing going on, and Shadowheart is honestly just sweet. She's nice. We cuddled.

Lae'zel craved Hank's moisture, but I did not relinquish it.

I'm also wearing Minthara's At-Ease Clothes dyed yellow around camp because they feel very classic Hank, not least because they show off his muscles and chest hair.

If you want the exact settings (colour tones, hair, etc) that I used to make Hank, then let me know and I can post them - I'm playing on PS5, so everything available there will be available vanilla on PC. Wish I could have mods to give him glasses, but tbh, I'm very happy with how he's turned out so far!

#Anonymous #outofmuffins

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joyful-soul-collector · 1 year

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I fucked Darth Vader in a Dominos

Here's how it happened.

I got off work from where I work at a renaissance fair, and about half of my DnD party was also working today. We went to Dominos together to get pizza, and as we sat down to wait for it, this weird, boss-fight sounding music starts playing from the speakers. I still don't know why it started playing, but it did, and our DM jokingly told us to roll for initiative.

Little did she know that I had my dice bag with me, with exactly enough dice sets for everyone there. We rolled and suddenly we just. Started a mini oneshot, right in this fuckin Dominos. And because my DM is a nerd, and it's May 4th, we started fighting Darth Vader.

Everyone else in the party started fighting him, however my character is kind of the resident slut of the group, and I happened to be using my Slut Dice (my dice that only roll nat 20s when I'm flirting with people for some reason). So of course, I decide to seduce Darth Vader:

Me: "…I want to roll to seduce Darth Vader." DM, in the most pained voice: "Marko… I just--I'm going to need you to say that again one more time." Me: "I Want To Seduce Darth Vader. Please." DM, trying so hard not to just die on the spot: "…Okay."

So I roll to seduce him, and all the other players think it's hilarious, so they stop fighting him to let me try and seduce him. But then I start rolling bad, so one of the other players starts trying to help, seducing him as well. Then another player, then another, and then finally we're all fucking flirting with Darth Vader in a goddamn Dominos.

At one point he put one of us in a force choke and you can imagine that backfired on him completely as that character went "ooh kinky!" and mine said "aww babe you're supposed to do that to me"

And then Vader rolls a nat 1. He cannot resist all of us. We're just too attractive, he cannot handle it.

Darth Vader motions for us to follow him back to his quarters.

The next day we each find a little gift waiting for us: one of us got his boots, the other got his mask, another got his belt, and my character got the chain that holds up his cloak.

Apparently we are allowed to keep these gifts in our real campaign and use them should they possibly help us somehow. I don't know how Vader's cloak chain could POSSIBLY be helpful but I will find a way somehow. My DM is crying in laughter. We're all laughing so much it's hard to breathe. I don't know if those Domino's employees could hear us very well but if they could I imagine they have one hell of a story to tell later.

Anyway that's the story of how I and my party fucked Darth Vader right in a Dominos

May the Fourth be with you all

#may the fourth be with you #dungeons and dragons #darth vader #anakin skywalker #dnd #may 4th #star wars #dnd stuff #dnd campaign #dnd memes #I don't even like star wars so to me this is better than all of the movies combined #who knew that all you needed to do to defeat vader was fuck him

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eddiessweetheart86 · 11 months

Text

Feels Like The First Time

💖🖤Enemies to lovers with Eddie Munson🖤💖

Character uses she/her pronouns is bisexual☺️

Warning: Unprotected PIV, fingering, oral sex (Fem receiving), language, smoking (weed and cigarettes), mentions of drinking

‼️‼️ MDNI ‼️‼️

Kinda short and quickly skimmed through. I was bored and haven’t posted much in a hot minute:)

You love hanging out with your uncle who is next door neighbors with Eddie. You smoke weed and drink with him. You’re parents don’t allow you to do any of those things so you go to your uncle trailer. You’re not a fiend, you just like having a good time, especially on the weekends when you have nothing better to do. Dustin wants you to play DnD with Mike and him since you don’t do anything except hang out with Steve and Robin or Robert. You declined the offer because, while you loved Dustin, you didn’t wanna spend they day in a basement with preteens.

He loves movies, music and books just like you, so with him you feel like you can have a conversation. He’s also gay and it comforts you knowing you can talk to someone about your sexuality since you realized very young that you are bisexual. You don’t have many close friends, do you consider your uncle to be your best friend. It sounds sad but know one knows you like he does, he’s known you your whole life.

You already knew Eddie for class and wasn’t a big fan. He never did anything but that was the issue. You’re biggest pet peeve about him was that he would complain about failing but then not show up to class. He was also a smart ass and stared at you a lot. He did it partly because he thought you were drop dead gorgeous and partly to annoy you.

You also knew him because he was your uncle’s dealer. Sometimes when you’d spend the night, you would go out to smoke late at night only to see Eddie’s van rocking and loud, but muffled, moans coming out of it. Sometimes you’d hear it from his trailer. You couldn’t believe how Eddie Munson had these girls screaming his name.

When you heard it, it turned you on. The feeling freaked you out so much that you had to go inside and grab your Walkman just so you can smoke in peace, but every once in a while you would take one of the headphones off, not only to hear if they were done, but to hear if they were still going. One day you heard him yell “fuck” and that’s when you felt an even heavier, wetter heat between your legs.

The days, and eventually weeks, went on and every once in a while Eddie would have some girl. You began to develop a strange, perverted crush on him and it terrified you. So every time you heard that he had a girl over, you would call Billy to have him fuck the daylights out of you. You caught yourself imagining it was Eddie and had to pause for a moment to snap out of it. But that’s exactly why you’re fucking around with Billy. Because you want to imagine it’s Eddie. The thought of Eddie with someone makes you jealous and you wanted to blow off some steam.

Eddie knew you hated him. You weren’t the best at masking your resting bitch face. But you looked at everyone like that. But Eddie annoyed you because you began to have feelings for him.

One day in class, you are sitting in study hall when you feel a tap on your back, you turn around and Robin hands you a note

How was your date with Billy? She wrote

Fine. You replied

Are you gonna see him again?

Probably not. He may be great in bed/car but he’s so dull.

So who’s your next project?

You can’t tell anyone. So burn this after class.

Promise. Who is it? Steve!?

No. Been there, done that. What do you think about Eddie Munson?

I don’t. Why? Are you planning on asking him out?

I don’t know. He’s really sexy to be honest. It’s the hair and the ripped jeans. Also his band shirts (PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS HOLY BURN THIS)

So everything about him is sexy according to you. So ask him out

Robin gets up and mouths she has to go to the bathroom. You sigh and continue to write

I don’t wanna waste my time. We graduate this year and what if he doesn’t? Again! I don’t wanna be holding his hand while trying to get through college.

You fold the note multiple times and toss it in her chair and then begin to mindlessly look through your calculus notes.

Robin comes back and you signal to the chair to let her know that she’s sitting on the note. She mouths “what?” And the bell rings.

“You’re sitting on the note”

“Oh” she gets up and there’s nothing under her. She looks at her butt and nothing. You began to look on the floor and only see a gum wrapper.

“Fuck” you whisper

You look around the desk and it’s nowhere to be found. You begin to freak out.

“It’s fine” Robin says “your name is not on it so if someone finds it then they won’t know who was writing it”

“Robin… it’s so embarrassing. Somebody had to have taken it when I wasn’t looking so they’ll know it’s me! Why do you think I wanted to burn it!”

“Like I said. Nobody will know” she calmly says

Your face falls and you realize who probably has the note. Eddie. Eddie sits next to Robin but a row behind. He must‘ve been staring again, saw you write the note and took it when you weren’t looking. You rush to Dustin’s locker to figure out which’s ones Eddie’s

Meanwhile, Eddie is already at his locker after sprinting from class to read the note. He’s hiding the note in his locker as he reads you pining words about him, making him smile. While your last comment stings, he can’t help to only focus on your positive notes. That in this very moment, you want him.

When you run into Dustin he let you know which locker is Eddie’s but Eddie wasn’t there. You asked him where he goes for last period and Dustin says he doesn’t know. You grunt and he begins to ask why you want to find him so bad. You tell him it’s none of his business and give his hair a tussle.

After 4th period you still couldn’t find Eddie so you decide to go to your uncles trailer and scout him out. You’re not going to approach him because if he doesn’t have to note and you ask him about it he would never shut up until you tell him what’s on it.

You see him park his van as you sit smoking your third cigarette on the porch, talking to your uncle about the situation. You’ve never mentioned Eddie to him but you needed to rant to someone about it. He was shocked but also rooting for the two of you metal heads. You rolled your eyes and he nudged you when Eddie began to walk towards you. You turn your head and instantly get red. You don’t know what else to do so you put out your cigarette and go inside. So much for keeping it cool. The door then opens behind you and it’s your uncle with a big stupid grin and Eddie behind him

“Oh Y/N” your uncle sings

“Fuck off! I’m gonna shower!” You say running into the bathroom

“Hey… um I read your note, no need to be ashamed sweetheart” Eddie says

You angrily walk out the bathroom and point a finger at Eddie, “that note was private, how fucking dare you! And don’t call me sweetheart”

“Hey hey hey, I’m just trying to make you feel better”

“Yeah? Well you know what will make me feel better? If you went home!”

There’s a few seconds of silence before your uncle says “I sense a lot of tension here… so I’m gonna go to work and when I get back you guys better have solved this… but not on my bed or the couch or the kitchen counter or— you know just go bananas, I’ll pick up some bleach on the way back” he goes into his room for a few seconds to get his backpack and then heads out

The whole time your jaw was on the floor and you were frozen. Eddie had a stupid grin plastered on his face.

“You heard the man” Eddie says

“Fuck you” you whisper, looking at his lips, you couldn’t help it

“You wish” Eddie whispers back. His face was so close to yours that you could smell his faint scent of amber cologne, leather and cigarettes

Eddie begins to walk out, arrogantly, hoping you’d pounce on him and rip his clothes off. He opens the door and turns around to you

“Do you wanna come over?” He asks slyly

You don’t say anything, but your eyes say everything. You feel your thighs throbbing and begin walking towards him. He pushes the door forward and you walk past him and to his trailer. He was always a few steps behind you.

When he lets you in the trailer you turn around and look at him. Even though you act tough, he’s making you weak in the knees. You hope he makes the first move. And he does. He puts his hand on your chin, lifting it up, and he gives you a soft kiss. He pulls away and you look into each others eyes. You lean in again and kiss him more passionately this time.

He grabs your face with both hands you put your hands on his chest, slightly gripping his shirt. He slowly inches his way down and to your breast. You let out a soft moaning, causing him to smile against your lips.

You pull away “can we go to… the bedroom”

“Why?” He asks mischievously. He wants to hear you say it

You laugh and then gain a little more confidence “so you can fuck me so hard I can’t stand up”

“‘Mmm” he says and kisses you hard. He pulls away to hold your hand and pull you into the bedroom. He removes his shirt and you do the same. You then pounce on each other before falling onto the bed. You land on top of Eddie and he unclips your bra as you make out ferociously. Once your bra is off he stares at your tits as if they are golden artifact at the beginning of Raiders of the Lost Ark and he’s Indians Jones himself. You sit up to remove his jeans and then your own

“So impatient” he laughs as he takes off his boxers.

“I need you inside me” you moan

You get on top but he flips you over and kisses you down your stomach and to your pussy.

“You’re fucking soaked, Y/N” he groans

You laugh and he begins to rub your clit slowly. You yelp as his finger enters you and then he begins to kiss your clit. You’ve never had someone do this before. He laps up your wetness, focusing on your clit and also going in and out of you with his fingers. The coldness of his rings are at your entrance, a stimulation you’ve never felt.

You moan and run your fingers through his hair as he sucks your clit and pumps his fingers in and out of you. You start to feel heat in your pelvis and thighs and know you’re close. You’ve always had this feeling and then it would go away, but you would tell people you came to make things not so awkward. But this time an orgasm was really coming. Looking down and seeing Eddie looking back up at you with his deep brown eyes as he softly thrusts into the mattress is what finally did it. You yell an exasperated “fuck” and writhe below him as he keeps going, causing you to squirt into Eddie mouth, neck and chest. But he keeps going, gripping onto your thighs for dear life.

“Eddie Eddie Eddie!!” You gasp, and he looks up at you, clearly very proud of himself

“Yes?” he says with a smile

“Cum inside me” is all you want to say

“Oh baby” he says and he leans down to kiss you.

He grips his cock and lines it up at your entrance. He pushes in easily and you both let out loud moans. He sits in, deeply, for a few seconds and stares down at you, softly stroking one of you nipples, his tongue grazing the other. He gently pulls out and thrusts roughly back in causing you to scream and claw at his back. He does it again. And again. And again.

He sits up and outs your calves on his shoulder as pumps in and out of your wet pussy. Just looking at him is enough to make you come undone again.

“I’m gonna cum, baby” you say mindlessly

“Me too— fuck”

You clench around him causing him to empty his warm cum into your pussy. Thank fuck you’re on birth control.

He thrusts a few more times before stopping and laying down his head in the crook of your neck.

He begins to laugh and you ask him “what are you laughing about” in between gasps for air

“I just… never finished to fast, I’m sorry”

“Eddie it was amazing. It’s fine”

“I don’t know what you did to me” he says looking up “but just seeing you below me, I couldn’t believe I was finally fucking you”

“Me too” you smile

“You know you’re not as mean as you let on” he says

“Neither are you”

He kisses you on your cheek and laughs

“What now?” You laugh

“You called me ‘baby’… why?”

“I… what?” You face turns bright red

“You did”

“Sorry” you say nervously

“No it’s fine”

“Well you said you finally got to fuck me. What’s that about, huh?”

“It’s exactly what I meant. I’ve wanted to fuck you since Iaid eyes on you”

“You what!?” You yell sitting up

“Honestly. You’re the hottest girl in town. Maybe in the whole state. You know what, you’re the hottest girl I’ve ever seen in my life”

“Oh stop” you say flustered

“Really. I’ve been wanting to ask you out but I thought you hated me”

“I do”

Eddie laughs “I could always sense the tension though, but I didn’t wanna assume”

“Me too. Plus you’d always have a girl here every weekend. I didn’t know if it was the same girl and you were going steady or something.”

“No different girls… wait did you spy on me”

“No! When I go smoke sometimes you’re busy rearranging someone’s insides… I’d… sometimes… well all… the times… wish it was me” you confess

“Fuck baby” he moans and kiss you “you’re gonna make me wanna rearrange your insides again”

“Think you can last this time?” You joke

“Woah!” Eddie yells “come here” and flips you onto the bed, making you two burst into laughter

#stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson smut

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