#so i sat down for uhhh. 6 hours and listened to people talk and that was my day

[citrushomie]

hello myles I hope you are having a good day

hi may hi sasuke hi rei sakuma i had a day i just got home and got back on minecraft immediately. the grind is real

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

*Cackling* Now rank your ot3's!

*long sigh*

SECTION 1:

Yes, there are sections, this is a list of 20 things. I like to be organized. These ones I seek out. I like them. I actively enjoy them on purpose.

1. Roloceit: My BOYS. Are these my 3 favorites? perhaps. You can't prove anything (you sure can, just look at my goddamn Ao3). Something about the dynamics here is just...so good for me? The combination of fluff/angst/multi-talented braincells is wonderful. I need these three to watch a documentary and tear it to absolute pieces. Also they would be so good at...actually having methods of supporting each other??? I love them.

2. Analogince: in the same vein, the SNARK. THE SASS. THE GROUPCHAT THAT WE ALL KNOW EXISTS THAT IS SOO OVERLOADED WITH SALT THAT IT'S A DEHYDRATION RISK. Also healthy communication??? supportive signifs??? good shit

3. Anxcietmus: The Dark Sides™. Again, I think these three just get each other. That means great fluff and great angst possibilities ABOUND and especially when it comes to being a menace in the rest of the mindscape. Yes. Good. Have fun.

4. Intruloceit: Someone please make this nerd take a fucking break for once. The chaos of leading what you THINK is a stuck-up buttoned-up nerd only to feel such an odd mixture of pride and mortal terror at discovering a TRUE mad scientist. Yes. Logan deserves to go ape-shit. Let him.

5. Analoceit: Did someone ask for some amused gay judgement? You got the whole scale here, Distinguished, Functional, and Disaster. They don't need the group chat because they can do it with just a look. Perfect. Wonderful.

6. Intruloxiety: slightly less snark, which is why it's ranked lower, but I don't think it would be any less supportive. Between the three of them I think they'd have a conversation about boundaries right up front and constantly be checking in with each other. Which is good!! Please do this!!

7. Loroyality (am i making up some of these names as I go? yes): The Light Sides™! The reason this is ranked lower is because I think they've got some in-canon struggles that would take some time and effort (from errybody) to sort out before I would consider this relationship healthy, but after that? Forget it. We vomiting sushine and rainbows and our teeth hurt from how sweet they are. I have faith in them.

8. Royaliceit: *sniff sniff* did someone say ANGST??? This is the only one I put up here that I mainly look for to get angst because BOY HOWDY. Especially post-POF? Roman you poor thing why do I project so strongly onto you, my god. This is a MESS and they need to do WORK to FIX IT but it's all about the misunderstanding and the healing and oh my god please someone tell Roman his worth is not based on how well his work is received please. Also if you're like me and you subscribe to the headcanon that the last time Patton and Janus agreed on something it was to stay in the closet as long as possible...*choo choo bitches angst town here we come*

SECTION 2:

These ones I don't actively seek out but you know?? For a headcanon post? They seem pretty chill. Haven't devoted a lot of brainpower to 'em, just think they're neat.

9. Moloceit (my keyboard is so confused you guys): Now THIS. THIS is the obnoxious trio of philosophy majors that ALWAYS hog the good library table. Someone will say ONE GODDAMN thing and they'll be talking about ontology and subjectivity for hours. It's impossible to tell whether or not they're being serious when they do it. As a most-definitely-not-a-philosophy-student, no. I mean, yes but no.

10. Anaroceit: you know those fucking divas that strut into the mall like they own the goddamn place? These bastards. They are the Heathers (except actually decent people) and you will not get between them and their purchases. If you come after one of them the other will overprotective the fuck out of them and rip you to shreds. You might be worried sometimes that they're hurting each other but they do actually talk about their boundaries. solid 7/10.

11. Analogicality: (whoa, we're halfway there...): These three just seem like they'd be super domestic. Not that it wouldn't also be adorable, but just kinda...routine? Virgil doesn't like new shit, Logan likes a schedule, and Patton enjoys doing things together in 'traditions.' Some spice but they're all fairly level-headed so...the most they get is screaming out songs with the windows down (WHOA LIVIN' ON A PRAYER)

12: Intrulogicality: You know those scenarios where you got Person A who runs headlong into crazy bullshit, Person B who likes to pretend they're not as into the crazy bullshit as Person A but is, and Person C who gets dragged into shit? There you go.

13: Anxmoceit: I think once they all sat down and had a conversation they might actually be decent??? But I can't stop seeing Patton and Janus coparenting Virgil so it stays platonic in my head. (listen i don't kinkshame but i am aroace, that does limit me a bit when it comes to this bag of nonsense)

14. Intrumoceit: Again, LONG conversation, but it's better to have one crazy dumbass whom you both love but please stop giving up heart attacks every two seconds bb we can't deal with these palpitations. I think this would require SO much work on Patton's end to make this healthy that I can't see it very clearly.

15. Intrumoxiety: This one I put down here because while Janus isn't the best at being straightforward (or straight) he DOES understand himself enough to actually have a productive conversation when he has to. I think Virgil would be too caught up between the dynamic of Patton and Remus for it to be healthy for him, especially at the beginning. It would end up dumping too much of the conflict resolution into his court and uh...no. No thanks. Do I think they COULD make it work? Yes, of course, but I wouldn't seek it out.

16. Anaroyality: Uhhh yeah they exist. Y'all gotta do some work to establish good boundaries but yeah, I think you could do it. Have a makeup day where everybody just fucks shit UP at a Sephora or an Ulta and try crazy looks on each other. You could do it. I believe in you.

SECTION 3:

These are the ones I will actively avoid, more often than not. If they're not handled carefully--which is not the responsibility of other creators, I take full blame, this is just how I personally interpret them--they can squick me out. The ones with Roman and Remus are down here, and as a disclaimer, this isn't because I view poly relationships where not all parties are dating each other as inherently inferior, not at all. I just think that within a relationship where both Roman and Remus are dating the same person, that has the potential to go REAL bad REAL quick.

17. Intrulogince: Do I want to see Roman and Remus playfully competing to win the favor of our favorite nerd? yes. Do I think it would end up aggravating the rivalry they already had to really bad places? Also yes. Either with Roman backing off and internalizing the idea that he's not good enough or by exploding on both of them. It's a bad time. No. That being said, I have seen things where Logan is just spoiled by incredible things made in the Imagination and those are very sweet. a good time.

18. Intruprinxiety (that looks so weird when it's spelled out, oh my god it sounded so much better in my head): Again, exacerbating a pre-existing rivalry, oh dear me, and this time poor Virgil's caught in the middle? a mess. There is also the potential for them to be childhood friends to lovers which would be very sweet but the overlap with all of their combined histories are...a lot of baggage. Like so much.

19. Intruroceit: The only way I can see this happening is Roman's inadequacy issues and abandonment issues going THROUGH THE FUCKING ROOF and it would force Remus into being a pseudo-therapist for them and Janus your habit of messing with Roman needs to gtfo right the fuck now.

20. Intruroyality: is anyone surprised that this one is my least favorite? Between the squicks I get from Patton as a character, the relationship between Patton and both of the twins in canon, and how much baggage Roman and Remus have...no. Absolutely not. I have horrible memories of some very toxic relationships that I can absolutely see here and no.

*phew* that was a long one. you're welcome.

EDIT: thank you @shinekittenace for names seriously this post is a mess

[wonderland-in-bloom]

riddle, ace, deuce, and malleus watching a meteor shower w/ the reader

anon asked: hi! may i request hcs for a reader who's a super nerd for everything related to space and stars (as in. they'd talk about it for literal Hours if u'd let them) dragging out their friend (who maaybe has a crush on them lol) ace, deuce, riddle and malleus to stargaze after hearing there's gonna be a meteor shower that night, perhaps from astronomy class? how would they react, would they enjoy such an activity + how would they deal with such an excitable and odd person such as the reader? tysm!! 💖

im bacccccccc from deeeeeeeed,, hey guys how are y’all doing? i think this will be the last request i’ll do before i focus my attention on the summer beach bash writing collab event held by the amazing, the lovely @nonsensical-twistedriddles​ anyways i hope you all are doing alright and enjoy these headcanons ❤️

for a better visual/image of what the meteor shower is like, refer to kimi no na wa or episode 6 of violet evergarden “somewhere, under a starry sky”

headcanons under the cut :))

riddle rosehearts

being the dorm leader of heartslabyul means that he’s always busy and he has tons of things to do, so when you first approached him he was a little hesitant 

“i....i don’t know (y/n)...” “pleaseeeeeeee”

you gave him your signature ‘cute puppy dog eyes’ and that was when he knew he couldn’t resist, so he agreed

that night he was surprised to find himself in a hill at the back of the school. you had laid out a blanket and brought a couple of pillows and a telescope just in case. a couple books about the whole meteor shower, and books about stars and space in general were sprawled across the grass as well

“ah riddle! you’re on time!” “of course. those who are late have to be taught a lesson” 

you patted the empty space next to you and he sat down beside you

“i’ve actually read about tonight’s meteor shower in one of my books. it happens once every 300 years! i’m just getting super duper excited just thinking about it! the fact that i get to see a comet that happens once in 300 years! aaaah! it’s amazing!”

personally, riddle didn’t know too much about comets or meteors or just astronomy. he just knew what he needed to learn for the subject. but seeing you being so happy and hyped about the meteor shower made him want to learn more

as you continued to ramble, riddle let out a small chuckle, causing you to focus your attention on him

“sorry, sorry. it’s just...you’re so cute rambling about these things. please tell me more.”

riddle saw a light in your eyes as they seemed to sparkle and you continued

he didn’t really understand half of the things you were saying but he enjoyed it

“and...and then it said that-” your sentence got cut off as the meteor shower started. an array of colors filled the sky as the sight before your eyes was the most beautiful thing you’ve seen

you stood up and just gazed at the whole thing in amazement, riddle followed but half of the time, he was looking at you. he was amazed at how passionate you were in this and how he wants to see you smile like this all the time

“(y/n). thank you for inviting me.” “it’s no problem, really!” “they say that when two people who are truly in love are together gazing at a meteor shower...their love for each other will be known to both and it will continue to grow.”

riddle blushed and so did you. were you saying...?

“well it’s just an old legend, though. we should head back.”

the next day in class, riddle approached you out of nowhere and handed you something. it was a crystal necklace in the shape of a star

“i really hope there’s another meteor shower soon. and i want you to come along with me.” he smiled before quickly running to his own class. 

and as the legend went, after spending time with riddle during that meteor shower, your love for each other grew and grew 

ace trappola

“haaah? a meteor shower? what’s so interesting about that?” “oh come on ace! you owe me one anyways! remember that one time-” “okay! okay! i’ll go.”

truth be told, ace really doesn’t mind doing anything and going anywhere as long as you were there. but his big ego doesn’t allow him to agree that easily. 

 you were both snuck into the astronomy classroom and went out the window to the balcony. a perfect view of the meteor shower

“what’s so cool about this meteor shower, anyways?” “a lot of things actually!” you continued to ramble on about it

ace could care less about space, stars, meteors, all that jazz, but since you were the one talking about it, he really doesn’t mind. there was one sentence which grabbed his attention though

“tonight’s meteor shower is called ‘the falling stars’” “what? so like...stars come falling from space? or is it just one big ass star?” “no! it’s called ‘the falling stars’ because they say if you make a wish while gazing at the meteors, it’ll come true.”

“what the-that’s all-” “ace! it’s starting!”

he glanced up at the sky, and truth be told, he never saw a scene as beautiful as that. it was really as if the stars from the sky were falling down. 

“it lasts only for three minutes! hurry up and make your wish!” he turned his head to face you and saw your eyes closed and face scrunched up. some wish. “alright then~”

once the meteor shower ended you giddily asked ace what his wish was

“hmm...maybe i’ll tell you someday.” “what?! why not tell me now?!” “my wish is something you should figure out on your own.”  “what?! hey! that’s not fair! ace! wait for me!”

the next day, ace was delighted to find you skipping through the hallways with a bright smile on your face

“good morning guys!” you smiled to your two best friends. “what’s with the smile, (y/n)?” deuce asked you. “nothing! just feeling happy.” “so my wish did come true.” ace whispered to himself. 

“what did you say?” “nothing. now let’s get to class.” “ow! ace that hurt!” “it was just a playful slap, you big baby.” 

now what was ace’s wish, you may ask?

i wish for (y/n) to always be happy, and to let me see her beautiful smile on her face each day

deuce spade

“what!? it’s tonight?!” “jeez you never keep your eyes open in astronomy class, do you? but yes! it’s tonight. so we should go together, okay?” 

you and deuce were known to be the chaotic, nerd-like duo over these things. you were much more invested than deuce however, but he just likes to listen to you talk about it. 

he helped you up the roof of the ramshackle dorm where you both could get a good view of the sky

truth be told, you were trembling a bit. heights weren’t your thing and now here you were sitting on top of a roof which could’ve collapsed any second. 

you clung onto deuce’s arm, causing him to blush slightly but he assured you that you both were going to be fine

the sky changed from a dull dark blue to a bright, glowing purple and light blue, and you both knew that the meteor shower started

“it’s...beautiful.” the both of you whispered in amazement. you and deuce just stayed up talking about astronomy and how the both of you got interested in it as the meteor shower continued.

“you know something about this meteor shower?” deuce shook his head. “...no? what?”

“it says that you’re granted good luck if you’re under the sky of this meteor shower.” “that means everyone in night raven college gets good luck huh?”

“i don’t know. it’s not specific! they didn’t even say how long the luck lasts or...yeah. it’s just not specific. it’s just an old saying anyways.” you and deuce laughed. 

you both felt something slip under your feet. “uh oh.” it was a roof tile. 

this caused you both to slide from your position and started tumbling down the roof. 

“deuce! do something! summon something soft so we don’t fall!” “u-uhhh, okay!” 

it was his and your safety in his hands so he prayed that he was able to come up with something appropriate 

“i summon...a big fluffy pillow!” you and deuce managed to fall off the roof without any harm and landed on the pillow, slightly bouncing even

you both laughed in relief as the both of you were okay. “hey, you managed to summon something good!” “well..maybe it’s the good luck from the meteor shower.”

“and you know, i’m feeling pretty lucky. so...i can do this.” he leaned in and pecked your cheek. your cheeks instantly burned up as you buried your face in your arms. 

“deuce you idiot! you should consider being lucky that i don’t slap the heck out of you!” he just laughed at your cute behavior and attacked you with a big hug

you two ended up accidentally falling asleep on that big, fluffy pillow and you both woke up to find yourselves in each other’s arms 

malleus draconia

“(y/n).” he called out to you. “yes?” “i heard there’s going to be a meteor shower tonight.” 

“ah! yeah...about that. i was thinking...if you would want to come see it with me?” you fiddled with your fingers. “me? i’m...invited?” “yes! i wouldn’t want to invite anyone else in the whole world.”

malleus felt delighted and was just looking forward to that night. he didn’t really matter what else happened during the day. 

“but i don’t really know where we can watch it from. the other students are planning on watching it too...” “we can see it from the diasomnia observatory.” “WAIT, YOU HAVE THAT?!” you shrieked a little too loudly

“i mean....if you don’t mind.” “of course. it’s alright.”

you were shocked to find yourself in a neat and organized observatory. bookshelves surrounded the whole room and a big telescope was in the middle of it. “this is amazing...”

“you could always come here if you want.” “WHAT?! WAIT, REALLY?” you beamed as you followed malleus. “i know your love for space, (y/n).”

you mentally slapped yourself, was it always that obvious? am i just too loud about it? ugh damn it. 

“you shouldn’t worry about it. it’s fascinating to learn all about it.” you were always there for malleus when he was in depth into talking about gargoyles and you treated him with the utmost respect. you also joined in the conversation and actually asked him a few things. he wanted to do the same for you. 

“i was the one who invited you, yet here you are doing everything.” “i don’t mind...” if i can spend time with you, i’d do anything. 

“malleus, look!” you pointed at a golden glow coming from the sky. it was starting. 

you two stood in silence for a while, enjoying the view of the night sky and each other’s presence

“you know...i’ve seen this meteor once. when i was a child.” “really?” you scooted closer to him. “sadly, back then, i didn’t have anyone to enjoy it with. i didn’t have anyone who is as passionate talking about it as much as you. and now, i’m glad you’re by my side, (y/n).” 

“and i’ll continue to be by your side! i promise, we’re going to see as many meteor shower as possible! we’ll go stargazing, go chase clouds, everything! and--ah sorry. am i rambling too much?” 

malleus took your hand in his and placed a gentle kiss atop it. “hearing  you talk about these things makes me happy, (y/n). and i’m glad you’re by my side. i promise we’ll do all these things together. i’d do anything with you, as long as we’re together.” “thank you.” you smiled back (trying your best not to lose your composure)

and you both spent the whole night in the balcony, hand in hand, with your head resting on him as you watched the stars in the night sky and as the sky turned from a dark blue to a bright blue

just like the way you both wanted it to be 

and now i wanna go stargazing uuuugggghhhhh or watch kimi no na wa/violet evergarden again efjwoejfowe. FAIRY GALA EVENT TOMORROW!!!! the best of luck to everyone who’s scouting !!!

love, a♕

[border-spam]

Leech Lord: Allies

Troy

Gar is about as native as a Pandoran can get, and has for years had a very soft spot for the bratty King.

He's old colonist, thinks his parents might have been with Atlas on one of the many failed corporate town setups that plagued Pandora 30-ish years ago. He was too young to remember who's banner they flew under when his family stepped out of the shuttle and onto the dust planes they’d been instructed to settle, just that things went wrong fast and anyone still alive 18 months later had needed to adapt quickly to what constitutes living on this planet.

He was drawn to the Holy City for the same reasons as most survivalists, it was an opportunity for safety and a roof over your head. Not needing to fight to eat or scrabble to stay alive is a blessing for most Pandorans, and he's one of the thousands who live within the walls who don't quite worship the twins as Gods, but praise them as holy... because the twins gave them a chance to have a home. Wether they are deities or not isn't a factor in the loyalty they've’ earned.

He's skilled with food. Knows how to spice spoiled flesh to hide the rot, pickle cactus root and delicate rock blossoms for long storage, or how long rakk wing needs to be slow roasted to turn from gamey string to meat that melts in the mouth.

Like most in the HC, he ended up where his skills have value and has ran the kitchens in the Grand Cathedral since its founding bricks were set.

It didn't take very long for him to find Troy in it one night - picking through ingredients and half finished dishes in the early AM.

While he'd expected to need to drop to his knees and grovel, the God King had seemed more embarrassed than anything, awkwardly explaining he hadn't eaten that day and asking if there was anything left from the after sermon banquet. 

His eager politeness had hit Gar hard, but his reaction to finding out the leftovers had been destroyed was what left a lasting impression.

Gar had thought the twins affluent spoiled little shits who'd hit things lucky on Pandora and been clever enough to know how to use their wealth to culture worship, so when Troy was genuinely upset to the point of disgust that food had been wasted like that? It changed his perception immediately.

This wasn't the reaction of some egotistical little shitbag from a wealthy background, this was the visceral panic and anger of someone who'd starved before, who understood the insult of food being destroyed when there were so many hungry... when he'd known hunger.

It took less than 24 hours for the kitchen policies to be changed and Gar's team to find out nothing was to be wasted. Uneaten and unused stock was to be transported at end of day to the Slums from now on, where it would "Bolster the flesh of the faithful."

Every time he finds Troy hunting through his kitchen at 4 am over the years, their chats grow a little longer.

By late COV, Gar's meals delivered to his sanctum are some of the only things God King Calypso still trusts enough to eat.

Tyreen

Xanshi Ur-Vendit is obsessed with the God Queen.

As her Saint of Marketing, he's got both her ear and a position of high authority within the organisation that he covets viciously, and takes great personal offense towards newer Saints he doesn't deem worthy of the title.

His pedigree speaks for itself, the man had quite a reputation on Promethea among the media departments of the high corporations. An expertly trained and cut-throat money maker that was the exact kind of egotistical, nasty piece of work that would be drawn to the God Queen's side.

Has direct tie in's with the esteemed Katagawa family, something he's used to his benefit throughout his career.

He fawns over her, she can do no wrong around him, and he spends as many hours of the day as he can trailing behind her heels like a lapdog, reaffirming her beauty and intelligence and infallibility with every breath he can manage between the underhanded threats he aims towards anyone possibly about to draw her attention away from him.

Hates Troy. Fucking hates him.

Too much of a hole-sucking little coward in his $60k three piece suit to actually do anything about it of course, but he takes plenty of his vitriol out on Troy's departments instead.

Marketing has such massive reach within the internal structure of the COV that he's able to throw his weight around far more than some of her other Saints, and regardless of if they actually like him, they tend to back Xan and his opinions automatically.

A huge amount of the conflict between departments and heads is driven by this imagined competitiveness, that Troy's people, Troy's chosen, must in some way be inferior to Tyreen's.

Xan is her right hand in his own mind, he's her holy knight. If she holds too much misplaced love for her brother to see how pathetic he is in comparison to her radiance, then it's up to Xan to keep Troy's people in place...

In reality? Tyreen isn't even invested in him enough to remember Xanshi's full name.

Seifa

Sei makes friends in low places far easier than higher ones, always has. People at the bottom of the ladder, folks who have struggled? They recognise each other. Doesn't matter where on the scales they currently stand, there's an unspoken nod, a side glance. You see your own - even if who you are has been lucky enough to change over time.

While she's never been in one place long enough to set up a friend network before that was tangible and not based on e-comms and data feeds, she's woven one since settling in the HC without really even noticing it was happening.

One-hand Jim in the King's Call, that high end rave bar near the cathedral grounds. Not so gruff now he's not drowning in debt, few more smiles while he's mixing cocktails.

Cleo in munitions stocks, breathing a bit easier since her son landed that underling role in the Mechanica, more food on the table with less worry.

Feliz and Irgo running deals in the western slum backstreets. Not competing against the HammerClaws for territory anymore since JK "got wind" of the shit they were cutting their gear with and had Vanguard waiting at their quarters for a polite discussion about unspoken laws. What Fe and Iggy are selling isn't exactly high quality but at least it won't rot your brain inside the skull.

Sei will tell you she's a lone wolf. She'll insist she’s a one woman show, runs shit on her own and doesn’t need others.

But watch closely when out with her in the city, check how often she buys a drink, how often it's not on an invisible tab the barstaff nod knowingly about as they hand her glass over with a smirk.

She's never asked to pay.

That should tell you plenty.

Seifa and Tyreen

- Early COV

"Ty, you ever wish you were born a guy?"

Of all the things Tyreen had expected to hear from Sei tonight, that... wasn’t it. She stopped reading the same piece of nonsensical math in the sheet she was holding to gawk at Seifa instead, staring at the other woman’s back as she continued to work on the data records they'd been passing between them all evening.

"No.. god. What, and look like Troy?" she snorted with a wince. "Nooooo thanks" Ty sighed as she leaned back and heard her stiff spine pop, waiting for a response that didn't come. She felt a pang of concern as Sei's shoulders sank a little lower in front of her, deflating.

This wasn’t normal, where was the bitchy retort, or joining in on insulting her brother? She shuffled together the files and stood, walking to her friend's side and sitting slowly next to her in the quiet of the twin's shared office. Sei still hadn’t responded, pretending to be completely absorbed by the notes she stared at. Ty cleared her throat with a cough.

"Uhhh.. why?"

Seifa silently reached to her side to take the offered files from Ty as she sat, pointedly not making eye contact, though the younger woman picked up on the redness in them easily enough.

"Sei, I need to have someone's hands cut off?" 

Ty pouted, hitting her mark as Seifa failed to completely hide a smirk in response.

"I need to have someone thrown into a pit? Huh? C'mon Sei, talk to me. You always tell me I need to talk more about things that me down, right?" she weedled, hands clasped over her heart as she faux whined, earning a quiet laugh from her companion.

"Oh god Tyreen SURE, if you'll shutup." Sei groaned, leaning back in her chair and running hands over her eyes. She was tired. Beyond tired, really. Always said she knew how to not outstay her welcome but had been wondering recently if that had ever been true. Day to day in the cult, managing people she’d never meet and holding the weight of more responsibility than she’d ever wanted was eating at her. Had been for some time. Nights like this helped, shooting shit with Tyreen, bitching, sometimes gently bullying Troy together if he’d decided to grace them with his janky presence, but still.. it was heavy, and Seifa was tired. 

"Ahh.. just the usual shit" she whispered, thumbing through the papers as Tyreen leaned a little closer, as much of a comforting presence as she could muster all things considered. An arm around the shoulder or gentle stroke of hair wasn’t an option. All Ty had was words and honestly, they weren’t exactly her forte.

“It's just like. Sometimes when I'm talking, and it's about something they think I shouldn't know shit about, like how Burgess is spending too much of your budget on expensive, low grade gear-assemblies when if we went off brand I can prove it would be better, they just zone out."

"It's like.. if they thought I had a cock, if I was 6'4, they'd be listening. " she added, eyes burning again.

She groaned, leaning over the table and resting her cheek across her folded arms.

"I got so angry. I'm used to dealing with it, it's always happened, but I just boiled over. This week has been.. long, I guess." she whispered, pinching the bridge of her nose as Tyreen watched quietly. "I ate into him in front of like, 6 other people Ty, couple of heads were there. That doesn't help my reputation does it.. that's just making shit worse. I'm sabotaging myself. They think I'm a bitch already without me starting a fight and stirring the pot."

Tyreen shifted in her seat, eyes thoughtful as she rested her chin in her hands, elbow propped on the table edge.

"Nah. "

"Just sounds like they're dumb. I keep telling Troy we need people with actual brains leading this shit Sei, if you're getting ignored cause you have tits? Haha. Wait till they meet me in person. " she grinned, a genuine act peeking through her usual haughty persona as Seifa chuckled.

"I mean my rack is way bigger than yours, you're flat as a fuckin' plank in comparison."

Asks are Open!

[beaufortswan42]

The Forks P.3

Beau’s POV

“Hey beau! Welcome to Casa Newton! I’ll hang your coat” McKayla cheerfully said. I was told to arrive after school so we could get started with rehearsals. Her house was cozy and seemed more life a vacation cottage than an actual house. “Wow this is a nice home McKayla. It’s all very cozy.” I said while looking at the family pictures on their wall. Baby pictures, birthdays, middle school graduation. Next to the wall was a hall of fame dedicated to their family’s sport accomplishments. Trophies from all different sports and even a few medals with the Newton name.

“Wow, no wonder you’re so good at sports, it runs in your family” I turned to look for McKayla but I froze when I saw her, one leg crossed over the other, sitting calmly on her couch, watching me with a coquettish expression blazed in her eyes.

She softly smiled and let her eyes roam my body. It was the most awkward minute of my entire existence. “Oh thank you beau and yes we have quite the knack for sports. Come and sit down while we wait for the others. There’s no need to be shy, come sit.” McKayla gestured at the seat next to her on the couch. I sat on the other side, praying she didn’t get any ideas. As rude as this seems I didn’t want her to get the wrong impression. McKayla is a pretty girl, if you’re into the cheerleader type but I don’t consider her my type. My only type is a certain girl, skin tone pale as the winter snow with bronze metallic hair, and the most stunning golden eyes I’ve ever gazed upon. I just wish Edythe felt the same about me. The only contact we’ve had was yesterday in bio when she tried to kill me with her fiery golden orbs. But in regards to McKayla I really don’t want to lose a friend over a girl. I know Jeremy has been crushing on her for awhile now. It would be a clear violation of the bro code if I went out with her. But I also don’t like hurting people’s feelings so I need to find a way to let her down gently before things progress any further.

“My family has always been known to be talented in all things physical.” The double meaning was definitely understood. “But enough about me let’s talk about you.” She not so subtlety scooted a few inches closer to me.

“Tell me beau, what makes you tick?”

“Excuse me?”

“what do you look for in a girl or better yet what does a girl have to do to get your attention?” She provocatively said, lust and desire reflecting off her tone of voice.

Uh what? I thought. My face producing red blotches of mortification and timidity.

“Uhhh I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you. What did you say?” I pretended I didn’t hear her burning questions as I desperately prayed for the rest of the band to show up. Where in the hell is Allen and Jeremy? If they don’t get here soon I’m going to have to run out when she’s not looking. I hope she doesn’t jump on the hood of my truck. I hope she’s not the type to jump on a moving car. Maybe I can call in sick as well? Maybe I can- what is she doing? I nervously thought to myself as she put her head on my shoulder. I didn’t realize she had completely scooted right next to me while I was in between my inner monologue. I need to get out of here fast...her hand is rubbing on my knee but how do I go about this? Do I push her away?! I’ve never pushed a girl before but there’s a first time for everything if she keeps this up. My hands were already clammy, I could feel the sweat falling off my forehead. I needed to react fast! Then it suddenly occurred to me. That’s it!

“Uhhh hey McKayla can I use your bathroom? I had a lot of water today, like a-aaaa ton of water and I really need to go.” I nervously stuttered to her as I quickly jumped from my seat.

“Um ok, yeah uhh-yeah sure it’s down the hall to the left.” She disappointedly mumbled as she sat back on the couch. I rushed to the bathroom, locking the door quickly and looked at myself in the mirror. Blue eyes and messy short curls staring back at a nervous teenage boy who just avoided getting kissed by one of the most popular girls in school. “What do girls even see in me? I’m not even that cute! I’m a solid 4 out of 10” I washed my face and hands 3 times and did my best to prolong my bathroom visit at casa newton. But what’s gonna happen when I go out? Will she try again? Or is she outside waiting for me right-

Ding Dong! Ding dong!

Someone above must be looking out for me because the doorbell rang, I could hear Allen and Jeremy walk into the house. I’m not religious but hallelujah, thank you Jesus!

I calmed myself down and made my way to the living room where Allen and Jeremy were talking to McKayla. I could see the look of disappointment and frustration on her face from the moment not going the way she planned it.

“Hey beau, how are you?” Asked Allen as he have me a bro hug. Allen has always been one of the kids I connect with the most at school. We’re both introverts, enjoy many of the same hobbies, activities and books. Every time we hangout we don’t feel the need to fill up every empty moment with conversation. Silence is good and is habitual between us.

“Heyyyy it’s my man beau! The rock god! Are you ready for this bro!!” Jeremy yelled as he enthusiastically shook my shoulders. When he let go I could’ve swore there were two jeremy’s in front of me.

“Alright guys lets not waste time any further, let’s go to the garage and get started!” I could tell that Jeremy was very pumped for this, even Allen was more hyped than McKayla who was giving me dirty looks for rejecting her advances. I didn’t mean to be arrogant but I only have eyes for one girl. The same girl who wants nothing to do with me.

I followed everyone to the garage and marveled at the instruments before me. There was a set of drums in the back that were perfectly polished, the guitar and bass looked like they came from a special edition collection. I was admiring the 80s synth keyboard when suddenly McKayla came up to me and gave me what looked like sheet music.

“Ok beau we’re going to perform teenage dirtbag by Wheatus. Here are the lyrics...and yeah that’s pretty much it...any questions? no? Ok great! Lets rock!” McKayla cheerfully said as we took it from the top.

...

We spent the rest of the evening rehearsing and going over everything to make sure it was smooth for everyone. I practiced my vocals, Allen was a master on the guitar, McKayla drove the rhythm with her bass and Jeremy controlled the beat with his drumming style. I must admit that I started feeling more comfortable with my singing and with the idea of performing. If Edythe was there I could use this song to somehow communicate how I feel about her. It’s definitely a step out of my comfort zone, but maybe this is what I need to get some closure if she decides not to talk to me again. The idea of the song itself reminded me of Edythe. The most interesting girl getting crushed on by the dorky new kid; yeah that’s definitely my scenario, minus the boyfriend. I wonder how she will react or if she’ll even be there. Would she like it? Would she know I’m indirectly singing to her? All these questions in my head with no answers.

“Woooooo!!! we sound really good guys! If we don’t win then I’m moving to Canada.” McKayla said, her bubbly personality coming back despite the certain situation that occurred a few hours ago. Jeremy matched her enthusiasm and gave her a hug while saying “oh don’t worry we will win! These other acts are just cheap chumps, it’s smooth sailing from here. All we have to do is control the crowd and rock out like never before. Which means beau you have to bring your A game. You can’t be nervous or stuttering...also please don’t faint.”

“Don’t listen to him beau you’ll do great, you sound awesome...it’ll be ok” Allen assured me as we walked to the front door. I grabbed my coat and we were out the door when McKayla reminded us to come by tomorrow again at the same time for rehearsal before Friday. There’s no way in hell I was coming first again. I learned my lesson. I made it my personal mission to come along with the guys.

“Oh wait before I forget what’s the name of the band?” I asked the group before I got in my car.

“We’re called the forks!” McKayla proudly stated as she walked over to me.

“I’m sorry....what? Did you say the forks?” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. What kind of name is that? Now I’m convinced, we would be kicked off the stage.

“Yeah we decided it would show a sign of school spirit and a sense of community.”

“What in the worl- ok I’m sorry guys but I think we should change the name before we go up on stage. If I’m honest the name is terrible and we will be laughed off the stage. In fact they’ll probably throw tomatoes before we perform.” I gently said to them so I wouldn’t hurt their feelings. I thought of how much more Edythe would dislike me if she found out I was in a band called “the forks” I couldn’t bear to see her and her family’s reaction. I was convinced that she would ignore me even more than before.

“Well the deadline is in a few days for name changes so how about-“

“I think the name sounds cool and gives us an edge with the judges” Jeremy defensively said in order to side with McKayla. We could’ve been called diapers and Jeremy would still go with it so he could get McKayla to like him. Before I could answer, McKayla’s dad arrived which means that it was almost past my curfew so I had to race back and beat Charlie. To bad my truck doesn’t go past 65 mph. I thankfully got home a few minutes before Charlie, ate some cereal and decided to call it a night. “Damn, what’s gonna happen on Friday?”

Part of me wanted Edythe to be there but the other half didn’t. The bronze haired beauty definitely seemed like someone who isn’t easily impressed. I could sing with David Bowie, juggle 6 bowling balls and stand on one foot simultaneously and she still wouldn’t be impressed. Fear overtook my body at the thought of her watching me embarrass myself. Me. Beaufort klutzy Swan. On stage. Singing. in front of Edythe-Aphrodite, queen -Cullen. “I’m so gonna fuck it up”.

It felt like I was laying in my bed for hours on a never ending time loop filled with anxiety and pressure. I tried reading but all I read was Edythe’s words from a few weeks ago. I tried listening to the new CD Phil got me, but all I heard was Edythe yelling at me. I pondered more about her and Friday’s event until my eyes started to close and sleep came over me. The last thing I remember was Edythe’s eyes, piercing into my soul. The same scene replaying over and over again. “We shouldn’t be friends...”

[veteranmortal]

am i allowed to look at her like that?

Beau let Jester head inside to get their room - there was always a rush at these little inns, trying for the best room, but she desperately needed to get clean - it was a terribly hot day to have been walking alongside a cart, and she was coated in sweat and grime. There was a sluice out back, framed by a low wall, and she didn’t hesitate; the water would be cold, but that honestly sounded amazing to Beau.

She stripped out of her robes, and set the sluice going. She luxuriated under the water, massaging her tired muscles, running the water through her hair. 

The dirt and water ran down her legs, and she let her thoughts turn, as they almost always did, to Jester. It was becoming inconvenient, her feelings. She’d tried to pretend, for a time, that she didn’t see Jester that way, but it wasn’t any use - it had started early, and it had just been a silly crush, just the natural attraction towards a girl who was pretty and friendly. But as time went by, as Jester was so very… Jester about things, so funny and sweet and kind, and Beau had fallen. Hard. Their conversation on the Mistake was probably when things cleared up. She loved her, and she felt it to her core.

She had no reason to believe Jester was interested, though. No reason to even believe she wasn’t straight, come to that. Jester seemed to have a crush on Fjord, and Beau had no reason to believe she didn’t - that didn’t mean that in her darkest, most shameful moments, she didn’t at least entertain the possibility, but what Beau thought when she was alone in her bed, listening to Jester’s soft breathing just across from her was between Beau and Ioun. 

Her rumination was disturbed by a strangled noise behind her. She turned around to see Jester had walked around to behind the inn, and was staring at the ground, face aflame. Beau dived behind the low wall that formed a vague ‘stall’ around the makeshift shower.

“I got us a room, Beau. I just- uhm. Came to, umm, tell you?”

“Oh! Great! Thanks, Jess! Great great great! Just give me, uhh, one minute?”

She took her time, drying herself slowly. Whatever would delay her inevitably going up to the room with Jester, where she would inevitably die of mortification. Eventually, though, it would be more embarrassing to delay any longer. 

Jester was sat in the middle of the bed, propped up on the pillows, sketching furiously, when Beau came in, and took in the room.

“I’ll, uhh, grab a bedroll, then?” Beau said - the room was lovely, but it was largely dominated by the queen-sized bed that Jester was currently sitting on.

Jester startled, slamming her sketchbook into her chest. “Oh! Beau! I thought we could, maybe, uhh, share the bed?”

“Share the bed?” Beau echoed dumbly.

“Like a sleepover, or something, maybe?” Jester said, setting her sketchbook down, “you know, doing normal sleepover things, staying up late, stuff like that”

“Oh, uhh, sure? If you’re okay with that?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“No reason! Just checking”

There was an amicable silence for a while after that, as Beau changed into her bedclothes, behind the screen set up in the corner of the room.

By the time she had finished, Jester was sketching again - her tongue stuck out a little in concentration.

“What’re you drawing, Jess?” Beau said, flopping heavily onto the bed next to Jester.

Jester let out a cry of surprise, and flung her sketchbook across the room.

“Wow, okay, sorry, I won’t pry” Beau said, a little hurt.

“Beau, no, sorry, it’s just… a little personal? Between me and the traveler, right? ” Jester looked suddenly stricken. “I’m not mad at you! You can look at my other sketches. Not this one though.”

“Well now I’m curious, but I’ll live, I guess.” Beau said, and they lapsed back into silence. Jester fetched her sketchbook back, but she’d moved to a fresh page, and was doodling at random - Caduceus making a funny face after Caleb told him something he didn’t understand, Nott sitting on the edge of the cart, staring into the middle distance, Yasha, asleep in the back, the light playing on her face.

“Beau?” Jester said quietly, some time later - it had grown dark as the torches died, and Beau could now barely see Jester, lying perhaps 6 inches away from her face. She’d put her sketchbook down.

“Yes, Jester?” Beau replied, equally quiet. There was an odd tenderness to this moment, speaking so very softly, so very close together, and Beau desperately didn’t want to break it.

“What do people usually do on a sleepover?” Jester asked “Because, technically, I’ve never had one before?”

“Well,” said Beau “I haven’t been to a sleepover since the monastery, but when I was there, usually people would play truth or dare, or play cards, or talk about their crush”

“That sounds like fun” Jester said, a little distantly “Which do you want to do first?”

Beau shifted so she was facing Jester directly. She could just about make out her features, through the dim moonlight, her eyes gleaming silver.

“Well, we can’t play cards, so I suppose we should play truth or dare?” Beau murmured. She couldn’t bear to consider talking about crushes with Jester. Pretending not to love her - that is, not to be *in* love with her, at any rate. Pretending her heart wasn’t being torn in two when Jester confirmed she had a crush on Fjord, painting a smile on and talking to her about it, offering what limited advice she had. She didn’t blame Jester, of course, but she certainly didn’t want to go through that unnecessarily.

Jester sighed in contentment. “Dares would mean getting out of bed though, Beau? And it’s so warm and nice and cosy in here with you” She said, and Beau silently sent a prayer of thanks to the Moonweaver, that the moonlight was too dim to show the blush she was certain was rushing to her face.

“Truth, then?” Beau said.

Jester hummed slightly. “Sounds like fun” 

“Okay. So, uhhh. Truth. What’s your favourite colour?” Beau asked. 

“Beau, you need to ask difficult questions, otherwise it’s no fun. My favourite colour is blue, obviously.” Jester said, but she grinned - games of truth always start with little questions like this, to get everyone comfortable.

“Oh, like your hair?” Beau said, reaching up to touch it, but catching herself halfway. That would be weird, wouldn’t it?

“Sure, like my hair” Jester said softly.

They lay like that for a while, staring into each others’ eyes, Beau’s arm reaching halfway across the short distance between them.

“Hey, is it my turn?” Jester said eventually, her eyes bright with excitement - Beau recalled this was the very first time Jester had had a proper sleepover. “Do I get to ask you a question?”

“Oh, right. Sure.” Beau said, blinking a little. She had almost forgotten they were playing.

“If you could do one thing with no consequences, what would it be?” Jester said.

Beau paused. She knew the answer, but she certainly wasn’t going to tell Jester that she would kiss her.

“I’d probably punch Nott. Just once.” She said.

“You could do that now if you wanted, Beau.” Jester said.

“Oh, I mean, yeah, but there’s not many things I’d want to do that I couldn’t theoretically do, right?” Beau said. 

“Right. Just worry about how people would react. But I expect mostly, uhh, what you want to do isn’t entirely unwelcome.” Jester said.

“Are we still talking about me punching Nott in the face? Because I don’t think she’d like that.” 

“Probably she wouldn’t, no.”

This felt charged, to Beau. Not like the sleepovers she’d had in the dormitory at the monastery. She honestly wasn’t sure what was happening, not exactly.

“Is there anything you want to do? Right now?” Beau said, so quietly she wasn’t even sure if Jester heard her. Wasn’t sure if she wanted Jester to have heard her.

Jester didn’t say anything. Beau was about to apologise, when the other girl moved. Jester shifted forwards, pressing into Beau, and kissed her. Beau’s hand moved behind Jester’s head unconsciously, their legs tangled together as they closed the remaining distance, and they were lost to the world.

When Beau woke up in the morning, halfblind from the light of the rising sun streaming through the window, she was momentarily lost, unsure whether it was a dream, until she noticed the warm weight against her side, the leg nestled between hers, the gentle breath against her neck, and the mass of blue hair that her face was all but buried in.

“Jess? Are you awake?” She whispered.

“Mhmm. Can we stay like this for a minute? I want to lie in my girlfriend’s arms for a little while longer. I’ve waited months,” 

Beau almost laughed with the joy that filled her chest at that.

“My girlfriend Jester” she murmured into Jester’s hair as Jester nuzzled further into her neck again.

It took them another hour to come down for breakfast.

[sawyersick]

all the questions for that ask game!!! (or as many as you want lol)

holy fuck bee............................. ok get red E its a Lot

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?

Idk what I would say but I probably wouldn’t be that freaked out... the last person I texted is a good friend/coworker and I trust him

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?

I uhhh can’t remember who the last person I kissed was because it was years ago but let’s assume it was my ex..... he was a toxic pos who tore me down because he had low self esteem so yeah I don’t really like him

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?

I would be upset if it was anything more than weed or the ocassional drink or if it was a full blown addiction and I would be mad if they didn’t tell me on principle...

 Also I would not be very comfortable if they did it around me because I’m a weenie despite hanging out in hardcore punk groups...... also I can’t stomach the smell of cigarettes im sorry

4. Is your last name longer than six letters?

nope! 

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober?

sober, I don’t drink

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?

like..... as a significant other? I guess. I’m pretty bad at telling my feelings to people and I’m kinda clingy when I like someone. idk if I’ve ever *explicitly* messed it up tho

7. What does your last received text say?

“sick” and then the sparkly heart emoji five times 

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?

lots and lots and lots.... unfortunately. we were together for a year and a half

9. Where was your last kiss at?

fuck bitch I don’t remember.............. school? my house? his house? the pool??? man the last five months of that relationship were affection-less

10. When is the last time you saw your sister?

I don’t have one!

11. What do you drink in the morning?

water and sometimes tea

12. Where did you sleep last night?

the car and then my bed when I got home

13. Do you think relationships are hard?

I mean everything takes effort... I don’t find it hard to do things for people in my relationships but I get frustrated when it isn’t reciprocated and I burn out

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?

nah

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?

yes....................... many..........................

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?

I TRIED to be a good emo and like the rain but tbh I get really reasonally depressive so I prefer the sun 100%

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?

nope!

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants?

jeans!

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now?

hopefully!! I met this real cute punk boy last night

20. Does anyone like you?

HA I doubt it......... I usually come off as the little sister type to most people

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S?

nope! 

22. Is the last person you kissed gay?

probably

I suspected that he had internalized homophobia but also he was weirdly transphobic to me so I dropped it and pretended to be a cis girl around him which is weird because I think he liked boys??????????????????

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand?

YES this girl from high school who talked about tentacle porn to school admins for no reason and did lots of other weird shit 

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?

yes! I have a whale on my hip and I want to get tiny scissors on my arm soon

25. In the past week have you cried?

yes I watched queer eye and a disney movie lol

26. What breed was the last dog you saw?

I follow like 12 samoyeds on instagram but the last dog I saw irl was this ADORABLE black lab who was a service dog and he rested his head on his human’s lap when she sat down in the library and I wanted to cry

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower?

I have a towel hanging right out side the shower so I grab it, then step out of the shower

28. Have you ever kissed a football player?

hm idk I think so? I definitely kissed a guy who played tennis but he forced it on me so I don’t count it

29. Do you think you’re old?

yes because I hate tiktok

30. Do you like text messaging?

I don’t mind it!! The service at my house sucks tho so I prefer cloud based texting like instagram or facebook messenger

31. What type of day are you having?

A good but slow one! I had a really good night last night so I’m just resting now

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?

I’d honestly rather get snake bites if I were to get a piercing but in general I’m afraid of facial piercings

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?

warm! then I can head down to the lake :)

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?

yes! he’s one of my best friends and I talk to him every day and he lives in scotland and I’d like to meet him one day

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling?

relationship! Flings personally make me feel icky and I’m over that

36. Are you a simple or complicated person?

I’d like to think I’m complicated but I’m a simple man..................... you show me whale, I like

37. What song are you listening to?

any song by Liily, all day every day

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?

yes! I perpetually feel bad about everything!!!!!!39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?

there was! but not anymore because she ghosted me for no reason40. What made you start liking the person you like now?

This person is so cute and kind and creative and nice and sweet and fashionable!!!! and fun to mosh with!!!!!41. When did you last receive a text message?

half an hour ago ish???42. What is wrong with you right now?

I am constantly depressed and there’s nothing I can do about it exceot keep myself insanely busy but that means there’s no breather for me and also I probably have adhd but can’t afford a therapist43. How well do you know the last female you texted?

FeMaLe dude just say chick

pretty well! I like her favourite band and we talk like once a week at the very least44. Does anyone disgust you?

yes my ex was very nasty and tore people down to his level and also this one person from high school who fucked over my friends 45. Would you date someone right now if they asked?

depends on who.... eye emoji............. but probably yes I have low standards46. Are you in a good mood right now?

yes!47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?

my parents? but other than that it was thanking Nick from the band Unpopular Opinion for the lovely tabling opportunity last night48. What color shirt are you wearing?

white T shirt with a cat pink sweater with a cat49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear?

yes one of my parents says nasty things when in a bad mood50. Anyone you’re giving up on?

yes my former best friend who ghosted me and this girl who keeps flaking on plans with me and also a boy who got mixed up in weird drama with me and his ex that I never wanted to be a part of51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for?

I’ve never really falen hard for anyone, just periods of obsession. I guess I’m waiting for that one sPeCiAl sOmEoNe

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?

yes, but I’ll settle for waiting53. Do you like rain?

a little of it!54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?

I’d rather they not be a alcholoic because I had a raging drunk coworker who scared the shit out of me once but I guess I’d be okay with the ocasional drink/drunk night as long as they’re safe55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?

So many times... I keep my mouth shut because it would never work for one reason or another...... also I’m so SICK of having to make the move all the time I just want to be fawned over I’ve never had anyone do ANYTHING romantic for me 56. Do you like to cuddle?

.......................yes57. Are you shy?

not normally! I LOVE being social but in relationships yeah because I’m insecure58. Do you get along with girls?

yes? girls who don’t get along with girls are lame...... lift each other up don’t tear yaselves down59. Have you dated the person you texted last?

nope! But I’ll admit I thought about it haha60. What do you carry with you at all times?

chapstick, money, and pepper spray

ya boy don’t mess around61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?

depends on the haunted levels, as long as the “ghost” would only watch/appear and not scream or whatever or try to make contact I guess that would be fine? but if It tries to disturb me I’m yeeting mysef the fuck outta here because ya boy needs uninterrupted beauty rest62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?

yep! I dragged one out for a year and a half when I really should have ended things much sooner than that63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?

nope! Been single for around two years now64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?

YES HOLY SHIT65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week?

I fired some pieces in my pottery class! my mugs and bowls came out so well

and I met the cutest punk boy last night!!!!!! he’s so cute and very my type and I got to dance with him in the mosh pit!!!!!!!!!! tell me that’s not the cutest punk thing ever

66. How old are the last three people you kissed?

19, 18(17???), and 21

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself?    

I’ve only gotten them done once! It was very enjoyable but I’m a cheapskate so I’d probably rather do them myself68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?    

leopard print I guess69. Do you have any stickers on your car?    

one! A turtle from the Maui Ocean Center. I’d like to add a few more sea-related ones and maybe a totoro I bought at a con a few years back70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne?    

literally who the fuck even are these people71. Blackberry, Android, or iPhone?   

android 4 lyfe72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?    

never? my DnD group would get round table or little caesars73. Do you like diet soda?    

I guess? I like it the same as diet soda74. What color are the walls in your room?    

one purple wall and the other three are pastel mint75. Are you 16 or older?    

yeah baybee76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars?  

nope  77. Do you have a job?   

yep! I’m a windsurfing instructor   78. What are your initials?    

ZSKMTS

but usually I go by SS79. Did you ever have braces?    

nope! I’ve got near-perfect teeth :D80. Are you from the south?    

nope!

81. What does your last status on facebook say?    

I talked about meeting my favourite band again!82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed?

no because he forced himself on me when we were young and I think he remembers and is ashamed and also doesn’t live near me anymore    83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?    

idk, I’m close but not in different ways with both of them84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?    

I was really good at the tumbling unit in 6th grade85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters?   

Once Upon a Time in Hollywood? I don’t go to the movies much 86. Do you smoke?    

no the smell of cigarettes makes me want to vomit87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops?    

I love heels but I LIVE in flip flops bc california88. Is your phone touch screen?    

yes???? damn when was this ask game made89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly?  

straight.......... I’m too lazy to curl it  90. Have you ever snuck out of your house?  

nope! I’m a weenie  91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool?    

the ocean!!!!!!!! But I guess a pool bc I’m afraid of the flesh eating bacteria in freshwater lakes92. Have you ever made out in a car?    

no but I HAVE made out on some random person’s lawn lmao93. …Had sex in a car?  

no I’m a virgin  94. Are you single or in a relationship?   

single pringle who loves to mingle 95. What were you doing last night at midnight?    

selling my art and listening to cool bands and dancing with cute punk people!!!96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? 

the day after the fourth of July   97. Do you like the camera on your phone?    

yes! I just got a new phone and the camera is way better than my old one

the low lighting setting is  c r i s p 98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits?  

I made out with this one friend of mine like twice and then I never did it again bc I felt icky  99. Have you ever passed out from drinking?    

no I don’t drink100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate?    

NAH BRO YOU GOTTA UNFRIEND THE FUCK OUTTA THEM NO RAGRETS 101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?    

nope I’m a virgin102. Name your favorite Kesha song:    

Liily? did you mean Liily???? my favourite Liily song is Wash, Toro, or The Weather103. Do you have any tan lines right now?  

yeah one from the ring I wear every day  and like a shorts tan from summer104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts?

hell yeah but ONLY if the cowboy boots are bright red or hot pink no exceptions

[millennial-medusa]

More Than Enough

guess who’s back with that pjo/hoo baseball au

there’s no excuse for this, it’s just a little percabeth comfort drabble with absolutely no plot anywhere to be found

(also it’s like, barely edited, so uhhh sorry)

read it on ao3

Summary: Percy comes home early from practice sick and upset, but Annabeth is there to take care of him.

The words were starting to blur across the page, probably because she’d been staring at the same paragraph for roughly fifteen minutes. Annabeth sighed and rubbed her eyes, hoping to clear away the letters floating across her field of vision, disembodied—disem…word…ed? That definitely wasn’t a word. Could letters be disembodied? Could words be considered the bodies of letters?

Great, now she was losing her mind.

The reading wasn’t due until Monday, but she was going to Percy’s game tomorrow night and didn’t want to have any homework left for the weekend, so she’d planned on getting it done tonight. Unfortunately, her brain seemed to have other ideas.

She sat up and stretched before reclining back into the pillows on the bed again. There were only twenty pages left; she could do this. She could do this. Or she could see if anything good was on Netflix.

No, she needed to do this reading. As soon as her eyes settled back on the page, however, she heard someone come into the apartment and slam the door behind them. She checked the time on her phone and frowned. It was barely 5; practice didn’t end until 5:30, so Percy never got home until a little after 6 at the earliest (and that was if he skipped studying with the team at the academic center, which didn’t happen often now that finals were approaching and games or practice occupied most of his time).

Maybe it was Piper? Annabeth had given her a key, but she thought Piper was working tonight. Maybe she’d gotten her schedule confused…

Before she could call out to see who, exactly, had just strolled into her apartment, the person in question appeared in the bedroom doorway, leaning against the frame in a manner that was clearly meant to look relaxed, but came off looking…wobbly.

“You look terrible,” Annabeth said, her eyes sweeping over his sallow cheeks and the dark circles deepening under his eyes.

“Thanks,” Percy grumbled. “Just what every guy dreams of hearing from his girlfriend.” But the normal mischievous bite behind his words was missing, and the rasp in his throat only drew attention to that fact.

“I’m serious, Percy,” she answered firmly, noting the way he was avoiding her gaze. “Are you okay?”

“Fine,” he grunted, but his gaze was still trained on the opposite wall and his green eyes were stormy.

She sat up, setting her textbook aside. She prodded, a little more gently, “Then why are you home so early? I thought you had practice.”

He trudged over to sit on the edge of the bed facing away from her and bent to untie his sneakers. “I did. Chiron sent me home early.”

Annabeth’s stomach churned nervously, and she closed her textbook and set it on the bedside table. The reading wouldn't be getting done tonight, it seemed. She couldn’t remember the last time Percy had been sent home from practice early, and she could count on one hand the number of times he’d missed practice of his own accord over the last three years. He loved the sport and his team too much to want to miss it, no matter how tired he was. Even when he'd strained something in his shoulder, he'd gone to practice, if for no other reason than to be with the team.

She crawled over to where he was seated, elbows resting on his knees and back hunched. His head hung down dejectedly. Annabeth laid a hand on his shoulder gently, leaning forward to look at him in profile. His eyes were shut and his mouth formed a tight line.

“Why?” she asked softly. When he didn’t answer, her stomach did another flip. “Percy, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Percy muttered aggressively. Annabeth drew her hand away at that, irritation flaring up in her, but Percy finally met her gaze and his eyes softened. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have…I’m just tired. Sorry.”

Shifting behind him, Annabeth stared to massage his back gently. She found herself in this position fairly often: Percy did his best to stretch and warm up before pitching or working out, but he always managed to work his back into knots despite his efforts. He only asked it of her when he was really hurting, but Annabeth enjoyed it. It relaxed him, and the soft, quiet moments like these that she shared with him alone were some of her favorites.

“Why did Chiron send you home? she asked, bending forward to press a kiss to his cheek.

He let out a sigh, whether in resignation or relaxation she wasn’t sure. “He thinks I’m sick.”

“That’s all?” Annabeth almost laughed. This whole time she’d been waiting for him to admit he’d gotten into a fight or had an issue with his classes or something worse, that he’d been suspended or kicked off the team. The knot in her stomach dissipated. Just sick? That was nothing.

Percy turned his head to look at her, dark eyebrows drawn into a frown, but she hit a particularly stubborn knot that had him wincing and facing forward again. “I’m not sick, Annabeth, I didn’t need to come home early. I needed to be practicing for this series, but now…” He ran a hand through his hair, clearly distressed.

Her fingers were working at the top his spine now, kneading up his neck to the base of his skull. He let out a strangled groan at her ministrations. “If Chiron thinks you’re sick,” she said carefully, “maybe you should listen to him. You don’t look great, Perce, and your throat sounds bad, too.”

“I’m not sick,” Percy insisted forcefully, but she could tell even he heard the roughness of his own voice.

“You are, Seaweed Brain. Besides, missing half of one practice isn’t the end of the world. You’re already the best college pitcher, and—”

“He benched me for tomorrow’s game, too,” Percy cut in. “And the others in the series, if I’m not better by then.”

Annabeth’s hands stilled. Suddenly his aggression and obstinance made a lot more sense, even if they were misplaced.

“Percy…”

“I have never missed a game, Annabeth,” he said, turning to face her. His eyes were bloodshot. “Not one game. Especially not a series! And if recruiters are there…”

“I’m sure the recruiters know you by now, and they’d be crazy to let you missing one game affect their opinions,” she interrupted, grabbing his hand and squeezing it reassuringly. “This isn’t a major series, and maybe with a couple nights of rest you’ll be fine to play in the last game or two. It’s okay, Seaweed Brain.”

Percy’s eyes flitted from hers to the blue comforter below them, studying it. “I just…Butch is alright but not a reliable strikeout thrower, and Malcolm’s just a freshman, so if we lose—”

“You have that little faith in your own team?” she teased lightly.

“No, but the rest of the guys are at the top of their games. Our offense is great, so if we lose tomorrow it’ll be my fault.” Annabeth felt a fist tighten around her heart, squeezing it in her chest.

“Perseus Jackson, you cannot actually believe that being sick is something to blame yourself for,” she chided. “The team will be fine. Butch and Malcolm have it handled, and the rest of the guys know what they're doing. You’ve got to learn to trust the rest of the team to do their parts.”

He glanced up, meeting her eyes through his dark lashes. Even in sickness he managed to be beautiful, and Annabeth felt herself reaching out to run a hand soothingly through his hair, scratching his scalp gently. His eyes fell shut as he leaned into her touch.

“I know,” he muttered at last, pressing his forehead to hers. “I just—if we lose…”

“Then they’d probably have lost even if you were playing,” Annabeth said firmly. “You’re good, Percy, but you’re not so good that the team will fall apart without you. You really think Jason would let that happen? Or Leo, or Beckendorf, or any of the others? Chiron?”

“No,” he answered softly. “You’re right. No surprise there.” A small smile was tugging at the edges of his mouth, and Annabeth let out a sigh before pressing her lips to his, chastely and quickly—he was sick, after all, and she didn’t need to be increasing her chances of catching whatever he had.

(Of course, it was probably too late already, but she decided not to worry about that now.)

“Get changed, and I’ll make you some soup,” she ordered, hopping off the bed.

Percy made a face. “How about ordering pizza?”

Annabeth raised an eyebrow at him. “You really feel well enough to eat pizza?”

“Well…no. But soup is so boring.”

“Would it be less boring if I dyed it blue?”

“…maybe.”

Annabeth rolled her eyes, turning on her heel and heading to the kitchen so he couldn’t see her smile.

—

A few hours, two bowls of blue soup (it looked horribly unappetizing to Annabeth, but Percy was content and eating, so far be it from her to criticize), and about eight episodes of Parks and Rec later, the two finally dragged themselves off the couch and settled into bed.

“Annabeth,” Percy said, his hand pausing briefly in the circles it was tracing on her arm, “you really think the guys will be fine tomorrow?”

Turning in his arms to face him, she answered, “You know how good they are. They wouldn’t be nearly as good as they are without you, but one game—even one series—is not going to damage anybody's records.”

Her eyes traced over his face, the shadows and moonlight creeping in from the blinds painting patterns across his skin.

“I just don’t want to let them down,” Percy whispered finally.

Annabeth’s heart ached. It was something she knew he struggled with—the thought that he wasn’t enough, that he was disappointing the people around him. She could hear it in his voice when he talked about his distant father, the abusive step-dad from his childhood, the failing grades and fights and constant stream of new schools, year after year. He pushed himself harder in school and in baseball—even in his relationships—than almost anyone Annabeth had ever met. Even more than herself, which was saying a lot.

“You’re not letting anyone down, Percy,” she told him, her palm sliding over his cheek in a gentle caress. “You’ve done more for that team than anyone else. Well, maybe besides Chiron.” Percy smiled at that, but it was strained. “You’re sick, but they’ve got it handled and they know if you could play with them tomorrow you would. Trust them.”

Percy sucked in a shuddering breath and let it out slowly. “You’re right. It’s just one or two games. They’ll be fine.”

They fell into silence, taking comfort in each other’s warmth. Percy’s arms stayed wrapped around Annabeth, even as his breathing evened out and his eyes fluttered shut.

Annabeth watched in rapture, drinking in every detail, memorizing the lines of his face—though she didn’t need to, she’d studied him enough by now. He was breathtaking, and she didn’t think she’d ever loved someone the way she loved him.

She was positive she’d never love anyone so much again in her life. The thought overwhelmed her like a wave crashing onto the shore, but it receded, leaving the sand smooth and calm.

“You’re enough,” she whispered. “You’re more than enough.”

“I love you, Wise Girl,” he breathed back, apparently not asleep as she’d assumed.

She curled into him further, and together they drifted off.

—

Much to his displeasure, Percy was too sick to play in any of the three games that weekend. Having Annabeth there to take care of him helped to make up for it, but he still didn’t like having to stay home.

They lost the second of the three games, but a home run from Frank that surprised everyone—including Frank himself—secured a win in the third, and the series was theirs. This helped Percy’s mood tremendously—as did the entire team, plus Hazel, Reyna, Piper, and Grover crowding into the tiny apartment Sunday afternoon to surprise him.

Annabeth grinned as she watched him across the room, teasing Nico with Grover and Jason, a wide smile fixed in place as it had been since they’d all arrived.

Annabeth thanked whatever deity had blessed her with someone so much more than just enough.

[kyungsoopilates]

THIS TOOK WAY TOK LONG I’ve been working on this for like 3 days i keep GETTING SIDETRACKED

85 Questions

Rulserinos: Answer these 85 statements about yourself and tag 20 people. (das a lot)

I was tagged by @vroomvroombaek 😭 i lOve you too wow hI 👋🏾

Last...

1. Drink: Kiwi strawberry Sparkling Ice (gud shit right here im telling you)

2. Phone call: my momma

3. Text message: a friend

4. Song u listened to: Cherry Bomb 🍒 💣

5. Time you cried: uhhh like two weeks ago

6. Dated someone twice: I m pure ive never dated anyone

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: ^ see the last one

8. Been cheated on: ^ 🤷🏾‍♀️

9. Lost someone special: 🤔 don’t remember

10. Been depressed: not to be depressing but depression is a constant thing 🏃🏾‍♀️ can’t get away from bitch shes clingy af

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: ooooooh boi I love a good margarita, never got piss faced enough to throw up tho sorry

Fav Colours..

12. LavENDER

13. ROYAL BLUE

14. whiTe and just pastel soft colours

In the last year have you?...

15. Made new friends: yah

16. Fallen out if love: nope

17. Laughed until i cried: i laugh until I can’t breathe never cried 😂

18. Found out somebody was talking about you: nobody but my momma

19. Met someone who changed you: not in the last year more like last 3

20. Found out who your real friends are: ^

21. Kissed someone on your facebook list: did i mention im p u r e

General...

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know irl: like 75%

23. Do you have any pets?: no :(

24. Do you want to change your name?: kinda... nObody calls me by my real name except my parents occasionally

25. What did you do for your last birthday?: i think i got drunk i forgot

26. What time did you wake up today?: 11am

27. What were you doing at midnivht last night? Sleeping 😂 scandalous

28. What is something you can’t wait for?: my next pay check 🤭

29. What are you listening to rn: my shower 🚿

30. When was the last time you saw your mom: half an hour ago

31. Ever talked to a person named tom: yep yep i have a friend named Tom

32. Name something that gets on your nerves: people who fail to realise how much their words and actions can affect other peoples spirits 🌞

33. Most visited website: tumblr 🤷🏾‍♀️

34. Hair colour: dark brown

35. Long or short hair: my hair is short but i like it long

36. Do you have a crush on someone: nope

37. What do you like about yourself: myyyy mental strength?

38. Want any piercings: i want my nostril redone, Kinda want a medusa as well

39. Blood type: A+

40. Nicknames: from my family its Bird 🦅 and my friends call me Stan/Stanny

41. Relationship status: single

42. Zodiac: Aries sun, Pisces Moon and mercurY

43. Pronouns: she/her

44. Fav tv shows: Stranger things, any kind of space documentary or those horror ghost story shows

45. Tattoos: i have a cross on my wrist, im not super religious just cause. Hoping to get a sternum tat eventually

46. Right or left handed: righty

47. Surgeries: had one last year in October, had my gallbladder removed

48. Piercings? My ears and my septum :)

49. Sport: gross, tennis is cool tho

50. Vacation: 😤😔 I don’t GET VACATION I HARDLY LEAVE MY H O U S E

51. Trainers 👟: Puma or Nike mostly ooor Adidas I really want some Fila Disruptors 😭

52. Eating: none

53. Drinking: watahhh

54. Im about to watch: myself be locked out my house for an hour (I DONT HAVE MY KEY IM AVTUALLY IN MY C A R)

55. Waiting for: CHRISTMAS 🎄

56. Want: to move outta my family apartment

57. Get married: yus

58. Career: something related to art or graphic design

59. Hugs or kisses: h u g s

60. Lips or eyes: lips and TEETH im awful at eye contact so beware of your teeth and breath 😂😭

61. Shorter or taller: i guess taller but not TOO tall

62. Older or younger: 😈...jk definitely older i cant deal with the youngins now a days

63. Nice arms or stomach: if you can’t snap my neck with your bare hands I don’t want chu🤷🏾‍♀️

64. Hookup or relationship: relationship

65. Trouble marker or hesitant: hesitant for the rest of my life 😔

Have you ever...

66. Kissed a stranger: uhh

67. Drank hard liquor: yep

68. Lost glasses: lots

69. Turned someone down: no

70. Sex on the first date: im p u r e

71. Broken someones heart: probably my parents tbh

72. Had your heartbroken: mmm kinda

73. Been arrested: not yet

74. Cried when someone died: yep 👍🏾

75. Fallen for a friend: 🙃

Do you believe in..

76. Yourself: 😃 to an extent yes

77. Miracles: yayaya

78. Love at first sight: nah

79. Santa 🎅🏾: the concept is nice but no

80. Kiss on the first date: cheEk kiss 😙

81. Angles: sure

Other...

82. Best friends name: Lamiae (Don’t ask me how you pronounce that because its been 3 years and a still canNot)

83. Eye colour: brown

84. Favourite movie: not a huge movie person but i gotta say 형 one of the only movies ive sat and watched more than once

85. Favourite actor: 제 아이가 도경수 😭 my baby b o i

And i ill taggggg

@cherrysooda @monicaexol @kyungsoobery @kyungsoorose @spicydyo I Licherally blanked as soon as it was tome to tagged so everybody else yall do it too.

[deeeelightfuldee]

surveyss 019.

1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it? I wish he did.

2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now? oooo, no. that makes me uncomfortable.

3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time? Probably saturday

4. Would you ever smile at a stranger? do it all the time.

5. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are? yeahhhhhhhh

6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today? yes. A sweet christmas song that talks about wanting the other person there next to them for Christmas. naturally, I think about Kile. THIS HAS TO GET EASIER.

7. What exactly are you wearing right now? a pair of black shorts. a skin tight pink vneck tshirt. 

8. How often do you listen to music? daily.

9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more? I don’t wear either all that often. Typically shorts.

10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2014? I mean.. its 2021. 

11. Are you a social or an antisocial person? I am easily social but i prefer to be antisocial.

12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter ‘A’? Hmmm. no

13. What about ‘R’? UUUUhhh no.

14. Can you drive a stick shift? At one point I could, but I don’t think I’d remember how to after all these years. 

15. Do you care if people talk badly about you? No.

16. Are you going out of town soon? Yep! traveling this week out of state.

17. When was the last time you cried? today. 

18. Have you ever told someone you loved them? absolutely. life is just way too short to not say that you love someone.

19. If you could change your eye color, would you? I am fine with my eye color. Though, deep dark brown eyes are crazy beautiful.

20. Is there a boy who you would do absolutely everything for? yes

21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having. another day without my best friend. My pool has a leak. 

22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead? i love it.

23. Are you dating the last person you talked to? No.

24. What are you sitting on right now? my bed.

25. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you? my friends and I say it.

26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have? boy, lets rub salt in this wound!

27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night? I want to sayyy Charlie or Roger

28. Do you get a lot of colds? no, not usually.

29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from? Hahahaha wow, I couldn’t tell you. I think maybe ON

30. Does anyone hate you? I don’t know. maybe? not really my concern.

31. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room? I do not. there would be no need to hide that stuff if I did.

32. Do you like watching scary movies? if I’m with the right people.

33. Do you want your tongue pierced? Not even a little.

34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be? like 17.

35. Did you have a dream last night? yeah. Kile showed up at my house and was pleading for me to talk to him. we drove down a dirt road and parked the car and sat on the hood and stared at the stars and just talked about all the things.

36. When was the last time you told someone you loved them? today

37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years? maybe so.

38. Do you think someone has feelings for you? feelings, sure.

39. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? yeah, or so they said

40. Did you have a good day yesterday? yes yesterday was OK.

41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship? no. but I was happy.

42. In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a girl? yup

43. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you? yeppppppp. 

44. What’s the best part about school? the knowledge you gain and being able to see it all come together.

45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook? I do but I don’t use FB

46. Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school? I passed notes to my brother, because we were homeschooled.

47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head? oh yes.

48. Were you single over the last summer? i was.

49. Is your life anything like it was two years ago? no, its really not.

50. What are you supposed to be doing right now? Probably laying next to a husband or nursing a baby of mine or something.

51. Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with? no, hes a little... out there, but no i dont hate him.

52. Are you nice to everyone? pretty much

53. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to? 1000000000%. I never planned to like Kile.

54. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat? cheating is just so not a problem on my end. I refuse to get into a relationship with someone if I am not passionate about them. There is no need to cheat. I don’t understand it. If you’re unhappy, leave.

55. Are you good at hiding your feelings? Yes

56. Do you think you like someone? i’m trying not to. 

57. Have you kissed someone whose name starts with a ‘J’? yep. a few.

58. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys? it doesn’t matter to me. 

59. Has anyone of your friends ever seen you cry? Yes

60. Do you hate anyone? Nah.

61. How’s your heart? It's broken at the moment, but it will repair. it’ll get better. these things always do.

62. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about? my assault isn’t the most enjoyable topic. 

63. Have you ever cried over a guy? Yes.

64. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now? the other woman.

65. Are your toenails painted pink? No. orange.

66. Will your next kiss be a mistake? that certainly isn’t my plan

67. Girls love it when boyfriends cry; correct? Depends. Personally, I like to know there is emotion. stop the pretending to be a tough guy.

68. Have your pants ever fallen down in public? uhhh, not to my recollection. but they are getting so baggy lately

69. Who was the last person you were on the phone with? sibling probably.

70. How do you look right now? Like I'm going to bed.

71. Do you have someone you can be your complete self around?" i did.

72. Can you commit to one person? again, not a problem I have. 

73. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to? not anymore.

74. Have you ever felt replaced? YEP

75. Did you wake up cranky? No. I woke up heartbroken.

76. Are you a jealous person? I can be.

77. Are relationships ever worth it? Yes, definitely.

78. Anyone you’re giving up on? I’m trying to move on from Kile. It’s not going super smooth yet. But he seems to be losing interest so theres that.

79. Currently wanting to see anyone? “what if we could put our lives on hold and meet somewhere inside of the world? I would meet you. would you meet me? On a park bench, on a skyscrape, on a mountain, oh yeah whatever it takes. I would meet you, would you meet me?” those lyrics speak to me on repeat.

80. Name something you have to do tomorrow? my makeup.

81. Last person you cried in front of? uhhh, i really don’t know. OH sam, for how proud I was of his therapy.

82. Is there someone you will never forget? yeah

83. Do you think the person you have feelings for is protective of you? I used to think so. I don’t anymore. He’s watched me be hurt by him and by people hes close to, and didn’t step in. 

84. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now? talking

85. Are you over your past? parts 

86. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex? when I was growing up yes

87. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to? not anymore

88. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept? oh boy. that is quite a question. that would make me very happy.

89. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in? no way

90. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated? uhhhh HAHA one of my friends yes

91. Will you be in a relationship in 2 months? Who knows?

92. Is there anyone you know with the name Michael? yes. hes amazing

93. Have you ever kissed a Matthew? No. I always thought I’d marry a matthew.

94. Were you in a relationship in January? How was it going? No.

95. Were you happy with the person you liked in March? I was then

96. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive? he is unique. has attractive qualities.

97. Who do you have texts from? no one wants to know that long list.

98. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say? i’m not surprised

99. Have you ever kissed someone older than you? I’ve only kissed older than me

100. Who’s in your profile picture with you? only myself

101. Ever kissed under fireworks? no

102. Has anybody ever given you butterflies? Yes.

[mmakehappy]

2017

1. What did you do in 2017 that you’d never done before? i’ll try to do this chronologically again: so at the beginning of january one of my best friends left to study abroad in rome which was sad and i missed her a lot. i saw rory scovel do stand up. i took an animation class which was fun for the first few weeks until i failed it lmao. actually my classes from jan to march did not go so well tbh but whatever i made it through. my sister came to visit me the weekend before st paddys day which was super fun and then we saw panic which was soooooooo fuckin rad i love them still wow! i went home for spring break and visited a local winery w my dad which was a lot of fun and then a week later uhhh me and @carrot-gallery became gfs!!! and my whole frickin life changed bc i love her so much wow!! but then a week after that i turned 22 and spent my birthday alone! which i tried to pretend didnt make me sad but by the end of the day i was very sad about it and thats when my sweet gf called me to sing happy birthday and i sobbed on my couch and ill never forget that!!! so okay then spring quarter classes started and i was a part of depaul’s visiting artist series which was super cool... i met a lot of new awesome people (both at depaul and the industry ppl that were our guests!) and made some great friends in that class! i was a house manager and camera op which was super fun. i went to a screening of my fave professor’s short film which was also rad. i saw a ghost story at the chicago critics film festival, which was amazing. i saw idiocracy in 35mm and then mike judge did a q&a! the very next day i was house manager for depaul’s student film festival at the music box! i saw chris gethard do a live recording of beautiful/anonymous and then also do some standup, that was awesome. i saw day wave live!!! amazing! i spent an entire dystopian day dealing with megabus. that was hell! i sat at an outdoor amphitheater and even tho i couldnt really see him i got to listen to seu jorge sing david bowie covers and life was magical for a few hours. my sisters came up to visit me and we saw aladdin the musical and had our minds blown, it was soooo fun! i went to the chicago pride parade for the very first time but i went by myself and at one point i was sitting on the curb just crying! not a high point but still memorable. i won a ticket to an advanced screening of the big sick where kumail & emily were there to do a q&a after the movie.... had a fuckin blast OBVIOUSLY and then saw the movie 9 other times in various theatres. i also made it into a commercial FOR the movie i just loved it that much lmao! i moved into a new (and my current) apartment! lorde released melodrama and fucking murdered me in my own home. otherwise i had a pretty uneventful but anxiety filled summer bc of financial aid stuff so that really sucked. i saw good time w taylor and the safdie brothers were there to do a q&a and they were such interesting guys i could listen to them talk for hours honestly. my mom and sisters came up to visit me and we took our mom to her very first cubs game which was sooo so much fun and they won that day too!! it was awesome and we had a great time :) watched the eclipse (or tried to anyway!!) fall quarter classes started and i honestly kicked ass at them, i got on the deans list (i almost typed honor roll lmao i mean its basically the same) i hung out with ari again which was cool!! we went to the aquarium! me and taylor saw beach fossils which was honestly the most buckwild concert ive ever been to i think, it was good shit. i got jobs at AMC (which i have since quit lmao) and starbucks and left my job at the paint place which was bittersweet! me and taylor saw mbmbam live!!! so fun!! and we watched trolls that night and goofed on it so hard!! i went home for thanksgiving and found out my big sister is gonna have a baby this year!! :D i saw mike birbiglia do stand up! which was soooo incredible of course (except i felt bad bc my mom was supposed to come w me but she couldnt go! so i brought taylor lol) UMMMMM MY DAM GIRLFRIEND CAME TO CHICAGO TO VISIT ME AND STAYED FOR A WHOLE DANG WEEK AND IT WAS THE BEST THING EVER SHE MAKES ME SO HAPPY WE HAD SO MUCH FUN AND I MISS HAVING HER RIGHT NEXT TO ME EVERY SINGLE GOSH DANG DAY <3 ;_____; and that was my year!!

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? last year i said id like to read at least one book each month and watch at least 100 movies - i did neither! im keeping the movie resolution though bc cmon 100 movies should be EASY for a film major wtf am i doing!

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? no but it will happen in 2018! 

4. Did anyone close to you die? not a person but we had to put down my sweet doggo, flash :(

5. What countries did you visit? still none :/

6. What would you like to have in 2018 that you lacked in 2017? More confidence that I actually deserve to be in college and that I can do this shit and I’m awesome <– that was my answer from last year and the year before but yeah. same. also money.

7. What dates from 2017 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? ummm march 25 when me and gf became gfs and also dec 17 when she came to visit :)

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? putting myself out there by doing VAS/Premiere, getting on the deans list for the first time since freshman year and then also getting a new job

9. What was your biggest failure? this summer i didnt do shit besides wallow and cry and it sucked!

10. Did you suffer illness or injury? nope

11. What was the best thing you bought? every movie ticket and the bras i bought for natalie ;-)

12. Whose behavior merited celebration? natalie’s because she’s amazing and works so hard!!!! and she can always cheer me up and im so in love w her

13. Whose behavior made you appalled? mine bc i could never just get my shit together and do my homework when i was supposed to :) < thats from last year but lmfao same!

14. Where did most of your money go? RENT, movie/event tix, food, in that order

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? THE BIG SICK, the new season of sv, p much all of the events that i listed in the first question lol

16. What song will always remind you of 2017? umm honestly probably any song from melodrama

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer? I’m a. happier, b. probably thinner? or maybe the same idk, and c. definitely DEFINITELY poorer

18. What do you wish you’d done more of? read and write and watch movies and write and read about movies

19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Spending money and also being bitter about everything for no reason <– last year and the year before that AGAIN and also same!

20. How did you spend Christmas? working at AMC which i hated every second of :)

21. Did you fall in love in 2016? yes with my amazing girlfriend @carrot-gallery

22. What was your favorite TV program? silicon valley, AMERICAN VANDAL, the good place, great british bake off

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? nah just politicians who like. actively want me to die lol

24. What was the best book you read? bitch,

25. What was your greatest musical discovery? mitski like why the fuck did i sleep on her..... tbh thats about it bc i still listen to the same music i did 10 years ago

26. What did you want and get? I wanted a steadier/better paying job and i have it!

27. What did you want and not get? idk i wanted to be financially stable on my own and i still dont have that

28. What was your favorite film of this year? ugh i hate this question! ok in no order: THE BIG SICK, GOOD TIME, A GHOST STORY, GET OUT, THE FLORIDA PROJECT

29. What one thing made your year immeasurably more satisfying? uhhh having my sweet girlfriend by my side each and every day 

30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2017? sometimes chic, always sweaty

31. What kept you sane? Sydney, my best friend in the entire world. (This was my answer from last year and the year before that and the year before that AND THE YEAR BEFORE THAT but it still holds true) also everyone in the sv discord chat still AND natalie of course of course

32. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? kumail nanjiani duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, taika waititi, and martin starr always and probably more but i legit cant think of anyone rn lol

33. What political issue stirred you the most? yikes all of it. all of the issues (this was from last year but same lmao)

34. Who did you miss? i miss my dogs and my family and my girlfriend 35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2017. You can set goals for yourself and talk about it all you want but it’s nothing until you actually start working towards it and doing something about it. <– answer from last year and the year before that and the year before that, still true!! imma keep that. also idk just like, there are good days and super bad days and ive survived all of them so its just a reminder to myself that ill be okay.

36. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. These days will all seem better in time Waiting on that hindsight

[cyanotiger]

paradWas tagged by @ladyvion

Roolz: Answer 30 questions and tag 20 blogs that you would like to get to know better! Aaaand go!

Nicknames: Em/Emm/Emmi, Daph

Gender: Female

Star sign: Taurus

Height: 5′2″

Time: 10:41 PM

Birthday: April 23rd

Favorite bands: Um, too many to list, haha, though i really like The Burnout Syndromes, Nico Touches The Wlls, OldCodex, and a bunch of (American or English) old rock bands, Imagine Dragons,and I’ve loved Green Day since I was a kid

Favorite Solo Aritsts: uuuuh, I’m pretty fond of Halsey, Layla, Lykke Li, Alessia Cara...there are a few others but no one comes to mind right now. Also, Yui (she sings the first OP of FMA:B, so,,,)

Song stuck in my head:  Sugar Song to Bitter Step (the ED of Kekkai Sensen)

Last movie I watched: Pokemon 2000: The Power Of One

Last TV show I watched: How To Get Away With Murder. My mom and sister were watching the latest episode, so I sat down and joined them. I’ve literally never seen an episode of HTGAWM, but it looked really interesting.

When did I create my blog: This blog? Around October. My old/personal blog, March 2015

What do I post: Mostly fandom (read: BNHA) stuff, my writings.

Last thing I googled: "tatsunari kimura leaving haikyuu”

Do I have other blogs: I have my personal, but I don’t really use it anymore

Do I get asks: Not really (plz talk to me)

Why did I choose my URL: So, I was trying to come up with a new blog name that wouldn’t be fandom-specific in case I found a new obsession (which,,,happens) and where I would post writing and stuff, so I wanted it to be easy to remember as well. Anyways, I was scrolling through shions-heart ‘s blog, and I thought about the triad mind-heart-soul, but soul seemed a bit cheesy, so I went with psyche (which is actually the exact word for soul in greek). I was also listening to Layla’s Smokestacks and one of the lyrics was “ I got a body of wonder and an emerald mind “ and I really liked it. The dash is there so that people can easily read it, instead of having to read emeraldpsyche.

Following blogs: 344 

Followers: 51

Favorite colors: Blue (esp royal or electric blue), lime green, bordeaux/velvet/wine red, berry and amethyst purple (and yes, emerald as well :P)

Average hours of sleep: 5-6 (i need to take better care of myself)

Lucky numbers: uhhh, i like anything ending in 7 and 4, but not 5, 6, or 9 (ik, it’s weird :’) )

Instruments: I play the violin (9th year this year!)

What am I wearing: Jeans, a midi sleeve shirt, and a cardigan that kinda feels like a soft blanket <3

How many blankets do I sleep with: one (two if it’s really cold.)

Dream job: Uuuh, i’m not 100% sure yet but. Vet, or caring for wild animals in shelters/conservation parks, or some kind of researcher in biology/chemistry/biochemistry, OR a writer (probs the latter, lol)

Dream trip: ...Everywhere. I want to go everywhere, no joke, but if I had to narrow it down to a few, I guess, Egypt, Japan, Italy, India, Russia, Madagascar...yeah, that’s already a lot.

Favorite food: Probably pastitsio. Also, lamb, as well as sushi (salmon maki rolls are a weakness of mine.)

Nationality: Greek

Favorite song right now:  Hero, an original song by Gio, that you absolutely should listen to, esp if you love Midoriya. 

I tag: @elopetothesea  @themusicalbookworm  @crzangel  @todorokiprotectionsquad @allaboutshouto  @paradoxicallyspacial @pintura @flandraws  and anyone that wants to do this, of course :D

[artterm]

2.18.20

yOoooo ok so first of all last night i was studying for my calc exam. Well it was around two in the morning and i was like uhhh hold up’ i feel deja vu. I pull up tumblr and i was like are u fr rn? This is my second time taking calc 1. Around the time of my first exam when taking calc 1 LAST semester I wrote on tumblr. I was struggling with a boy problem. Not boys. A boy. Anyways, i was stupid sad over this boy who didnt like me back anymore. So I was like no freakin way I’ve seriously liked this kid for this long???? 

Well now its four in the morning, I’m literally exhuasted and kinda wanna cry bc I have less than two hours to sleep. I closed my laptop and got into bed thinking cool I’ll get an hour of sleep all for studying for my calc exam, fml. Well now I’m thinking stupid hard about him. How his absence had an impact on me last semester. AND THEN, I started crying. I dont know why, I was just SO emotional. The last time I had cried bc of him was when he literally cut me off and said the words that honestly I may NEVER forget. ‘...I had to cut the shit off.’

So I’m sobbing at 4 am because for whatever reason the thought of why I wasn’t enough for him is floating around in my head and I’m wondering where it all went wrong. When I finally woke up for school around 6:30 in the morning I was dressing for my chem lab (I knew we’d be working with a stain so I didnt want to risk any cute clothes) so I wore some jeggings with two pairs of leggings under and ALL black jackets and hoodies. Pretty much I looked like shit. I was running on no-fucking-sleep and I as I stood there in the mirror in the morning I thought to myself, ‘lawd. Imagine if ***** saw you like this.” 

I wish I was joking. Cause thats how my day felt, like a fuckin’ joke.

First of all, APART from looking and feeling like shit when I went into the kitchen before leaving for school I thought ‘If anyone says the wrong fucking thing to me today i might cry.’ Even the mere thought of it caught me off guard. I looked up to the ceiling and bite back the tears. Not now. 

Whenever I make my walk to chem in the mornings I glance downtown wondering where you are and how you are. I hold onto the idea that maybe you sometimes wonder about me too. 

Back to my stupid ass story. So anyways, I have a break between chem and calc so I TRIED to study some more for calc and as I sat there I realized holy shit im so fucked because im tired af theres no way I’m going to be able to process anything during the exam.

And guess what happened. 

That exam 110% shitted on me. I was now at my PEAK level of sad, or so I thought (what a surprise right?). Before the exam I put my phone into my backpack. I didn’t even bother to take it out after that, because who the fuck is hitting MY line up anyway? 

Now my sappy ass is walking and im like yo whet the fuck. I either get out at 2:40 or go home around 4 when I stay doing homework after class, but today? First off I don’t even know what time it is and now i’m thinking why is there so many fuckinggggg people. I miss getting out of class at 12:30 pm. Fuck this shit. 

So I’m behind some people and the F line finally comes. I went to the side of the door so that other people could pass. As usual, you entered my thoughts. In my head I always wonder ‘what if...’

What if I saw you? I want to so badly but then again, last time i thought i saw you and i immediatly ran to a different door. It hadn’t been you that time, but this time, it was. 

I was glancing around looking for your face in the very back of the train when suddenly I saw a blue hoodie. ‘Theres no fucking way’ i thought. Then I looked at the boy’s face. He had his eyes closed and he looked very at peace. His head was leaning against the glass. Was he really sleeping? His hair was ruffled in the cutest way. 

oh god. oh fuck. I wanted to hide. I knew this is what I had wanted for so long because I’ve missed you but now that it was happening I wanted so badly to disappear. What if he saw me and didnt want to talk so he’s pretending to be asleep? Should I text you? Should I call you? fuckckckkck. 

I put my backpack down next to an older lady, ‘sorry’ ‘oh no don’t worry about it! That looks really heavy. You can sit here i’m about to get off’ ‘thank you so much!’ As I sat there i started freaking out. Should I say something? Maybe yell your name? no no you were awake by now and you had put your headphones in. You were looking out the window. What could you possibly be listening to? We were now at Yale Station and I knew that if i didnt say anything soon then that was it. I saw the empty seat next to you and I wish you knew how much I contemplated sitting next to you. I hadn’t realized how nervous you truly make me. I opened and closed the phone app around four times. I’m not going to call you. Ok fine yes I am. no no I’m not. uGH fuck ok. 

Even though there were people in the way I managed to get a peek at you when you realized your phone was ringing. You were confused, and then you pulled your phone out of your pocket. You looked up and your eyes met mine. For the first time in weeks I saw your smile. 

[fen-ha-fuck-you]

Tagged by @sat-star-one thank you sweet angel

RULES: you must answer 92 statements and tag 20 people.

THE LAST 1. Drink:Mountain Dew 2. Phone call: my mom 3. Text: amanda (@jesuisleslegumes) and I shit talking a mutual aquaintance (who 100% deserves it) 4. Song you listened to: Trust Each Other from the Game of Thrones season 6 soundtrack 5. Time you cried: Watching a little girl with an amazing voice get four yeses on America’s Got Talent

6. Dated someone twice: nope 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: absolutely 8. Been cheated on: I don’t think so 9. Lost someone special: of course 10. Been depressed: when have I not tbh Gotten drunk and thrown up: never been drunk, never want to be

LIST 3 FAV COLOURS (12-14): royal purple, dark red, dark blue

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. Made new friends: nope lol 16. Fallen out of love: i don’t think i’ve ever been in love 17. Laughed until you cried: probably? 18. Found out someone was talking about you: no? 19. Met someone who changed you: my conflict and revolution in early america professor, professor grayson 20. Found out who your friends are: yep 21. Kisses someone on your Facebook list: lol no

GENERAL 22. How many of your fb friends do you know irl: all of them? 23. Do you have any pets: a pup, he’s a maltese named casper and he’s the sweetest 24. Do you want to change your name: only if i become famous lmao 25. What did you do for your last bday: nothing 26. Time you woke up: late 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: sleeping 28. Name something you can’t wait for: amanda to come visit :’)  29. Last time u saw ur mom: a few hours ago 30. Last time u saw ur best friend: december? i think? 31. What were u listening to rn: Game of Thrones soundtrack 32. Have u ever talked to a person named tom: yes 33. Something that is getting on ur nerves: negativity     34. Most visited website: probably youtube 35- 37: three fav albums!! Love and War — Fleurie, Fever Ray — Fever Ray, Counterflow — Viktoria Modesta 38: Hair colour: dark brown, dyed dark purple 39: Long or short hair: currently long 40. Do u have a crush on someone: maybe? unsure tbh 41. What do u like about ur self: everything, i love myself 42. Piercings: none 43. Blood type: i dunno 44. Nickname: abby is a nickname lol 45. Relationship status: single as fuck 46. Zodiac: taurus 47. Pronouns: she/her or they/them i don’t really care 48. Fav tv show: the 100 and game of thrones 49. Tattoos: i want one 50. Right or left handed: right 51. Surgery: none 52. piercing: none 53. Sport: lol 54. Hobby: video games, reading, gif making, video making 55. Vacation: ?  56. Instrument: none

MORE GENERAL 57. Eating rn:cereal 58. Drinking rn: nothing 59. I’m about to: make gifs 60. I just: talked to my little sister 61. Waiting for: game of thrones lol 62. Want to: die? idk 63. Get married: maybe eventually 64. Career: voice actress for video games and such and/or editor for the entertainment industry

WHICH IS BETTER 65. Hugs or kisses: both 66. Lips or eyes: eyes 67. Shorter or taller: both? 68. Older or younger: uhhh around the same? 69. i give up man: lol 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: arms 71. go out or stay at home? a nice mix of both 72. Hook up or relationship: relationship 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: a bit of both

HAVE YOU EVER 74. Kissed a stranger:no 75. Drank hard liquor: vodka was the first thing i ever drank (thanks amanda) 76. Lost glasses/contacts: i don’t have glasses or contacts 77. Turned someone down: yes 78. Sex on the first date: depends on the person 79. Broken someone’s heart: i hope not but probably 80. Had ur heart broken: not in a relationship 81. Been arrested: no 82. Cried when someone died: what the fuck yes 83. Fallen for a friend: yes?

DO YOU BELIEVE IN 84. Yourself: most of the time 85. Miracles: not usually 86. Love at first sight: no 87. Santa Claus: not anymore 88. Kiss on the first date: again, depends 89. Angels: no

OTHER 90. Current bf/gf/so’s name: nope lol 91. Eye Colour: very very blue 92. Fav movie: wonder woman. hard stop.

I’m not tagging anyone, but if you see this and want to do it, do it and tag me

[shadowboxmind]

Tag game

I was tagged by @fire-fira! :D

Very long post incoming

rules: Write 92 truths about yourself then tag 25 people

LAST… [1] drink: Milk [2] phone call: My dad [3] text message: @sunshines-stories​ [4] song you listened to: Girls Can Do it Like a Dude [5] time you cried: Couple weeks ago?

HAVE YOU EVER… [6] dated someone twice: nope [7] been cheated on: nope [8] kissed someone and regretted it: nope [9] lost someone special: yes [10] been depressed: yea. A lot of cartoons happen during those times [11] gotten drunk and thrown up: Hell no

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLORS: [12] Dark green [13] Dark blue [14] Black/red

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU… [15] made new friends: Yeah! [16] fallen out of love: Nope [17] laughed until you cried: Yes  [18] found out someone was talking about you: Yes? I’m not sure what this means tbh [19] met someone who changed you: I’m not sure, but I’ll say yes [20] found out who your true friends are: Not in the last year I don’t think [21] kissed someone on your facebook list: Nooo

GENERAL… [22] how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: All of them. They’re all people I know, either from my school or SAT teachers I’ve had (hey they’re pretty cool people) [23] do you have any pets: No, but I want one [24] do you want to change your name: Not really. I have considered it, but it’d be a very small change (switching my first and middle name for reasons) [25] what did you do for your last birthday: Pretty much nothing. I can barely remember, I don’t think I even had a cake. Which was by design - I don’t like making a fuss over my birthday [26] what time did you wake up: Almost noon. Daylight savings is unfortunate [27] what were you doing at midnight last night: Doing biology homework [28] name something you cannot wait for: Young Justice season 3! So much possibility. [29] when was the last time you saw your mother: Half an hour ago [30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: I’d like to actually have time management skills, that’d be great [31] what are you listening to right now: Black Fox by Heather Dale [32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: Yeah, there’s a kid at my school [33] something that is getting on your nerves: My parents [34] most visited website: Probably youtube [35] elementary: Not bad. I moved from California to Washington in the middle of first grade. I have vivid memories of there being one girl who wanted to be my friend in the CA school, and one day I ignored her on the playground and she cried and told the teacher, and I said I just hadn’t seen her, which was a lie. And then when I told everyone I was moving she cried and we hugged. Good times. Then the one in WA was okay. Nothing remarkable. [36] high school: IB Diploma is a bitch, but I’ve liked the majority of my teachers. Junior year’s been the hardest, mostly because of the aforementioned IB Diploma and a certain social studies teacher but yeah [37] college: I’m planning on focusing on art in college but that’s in the future still [38] hair color: Black. Dark brown if you’re that person. It used to be bleached and almost blonde at the tips because swimming and chlorine damage, but since I stopped it’s back to being black [39] long or short hair: Currently long, down to the middle of my back. My mom’s talking about cutting it short, I kinda want a pixie cut [40] do you have a crush on someone: Nah [41] what do you like about yourself: Uhhhhh I am okay at writing and arting which is nice [42] piercings: Nah [43]blood type: O something. Not sure. [44] nickname: None. Well, online I guess “Nixy” counts :P [45] relationship status: Single and likely to remain so (aroace yo) [46] zodiac sign: Chinese - dragon. And apparently Virgo for the other one [47] pronouns: She/her [48] fav tv show: Uhhh I’ll say Young Justice [49] tattoos: None. I’d like to get one sometime though [50] right or left hand: Right

FIRST… [51] surgery: None, as far as I know [52] piercing: None [53] best friend: I don’t think I have one right now [54] sport: Ballet. I gave them up after a few years [55] vacation: China. But I don’t know if it counts if I spent a year over there. I was less than a year old. Otherwise, the earliest I remember was a trip to Legoland when I was maybe four or five [56] pair of trainers: I have no idea

RIGHT NOW… [57] eating: Apple chunks [58] drinking: Nothing [59] i’m about to: Finish my language arts homework (hopefully) [60] listening to: Wiritng music playlist [61] waiting for: My homework motivation to return [62] want: To sleep for ten years [63] get married: Nah. [64] career: Student

WHICH IS BETTER… [65] hugs or kisses: Hugs. Definitely hugs [66] lips or eyes: I assume these are for people I find attractive which isn’t a thing... eyes? [67] shorter or taller: Idc. Shorter means I can tease them about their height, because I’m pretty short. Taller will likely mean teasing about my height, but then I can use them to get things off of tall shelves. [68] older or younger: I have friends who are younger and friends who are older. I don’t care. [70] nice arms or nice stomach: Uh. [71] sensitive or loud: Sensitive? [72] hook up or relationship: Neither, but a relationship if I had to choose [73] troublemaker or hesitant: A troublemaker is just going to irritate me in the long run, so hesitant I guess.

HAVE YOU EVER… [74] kissed a stranger? Hell no [75] drank hard liquor? Hell no [76] lost glasses/contact lenses? I don’t believe so [77] turned someone down: Technically yeah. Nothing romance related though [78] sex on first date? Hell no [79] broken someone’s heart? I hope not [80] had your own heart broken? Yea [81] been arrested? Nope [82] cried when someone died? No [83] fallen for a friend? Nah. Unless you count squishes

DO YOU BELIEVE IN… [84] yourself? Eh. Occasionally [85] miracles? Depends [86] love at first sight? No [87] Santa Claus? I believe in the existence of historical St. Nick [88] kiss on the first date? Me, definitely not. But you do you friends [89] angels? I consider myself agnostic, so... if they exist, great, if not, okay

OTHER… [90] current best friend’s name: see previous best friend question [91] eye color: Brown [92] favorite movie: Mmmmmmm I’ll say the LotR trilogy

I tag: @sunshines-stories​, @whoisaudreytoday​, @trisscar368​, @romanticcomedyheroine​, @marfacat​, @ollie-official​, @saurons-optometrist, @justforsmiles, and anyone else who wants to!

[gnostalgist]

🌻rules: once you have been tagged, you are supposed to write 92 truths about yourself. At the end, choose 25 people to tag.

I was tagged by @fixationpsychosis ! (thank u!)

🌻LAST…


[1] drink: zero ultra monster energy fsdjlfkjds (its the only Good(TM) monster so i had to specify)


[2] phone call: my grandma probably. if skype calls count, then dirk.


[3] text message: my grandma...


[4] song you listened to: ok it was the schuyler sisters from hamilton but it was bc i was doign a colorguard routine to it which probably doesnt help but

[5] time you cried: idk... a couple days ago

🌻 HAVE YOU EVER…

[6] dated someone twice: yeah


[7] been cheated on: uh you know what? probably, yeah.


[8] kissed someone and regretted it: not immediately??? but yeah


[9] lost someone special: yeah i mean.. i hope its not permanent but yeah


[10] been depressed: all day erryday


[11] gotten drunk and thrown up: nah

🌻 LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLORS…


[12] pastel pink


[13] the one shade of red u know. like my blog aesthetic


[14] orange but its gotta be soft

🌻 IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU…


[15] made new friends: yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i made so many new good friends somewhat recently!! i love them!!!


[16] fallen out of love: im trying

[17] laughed until you cried: yeah


[18] found out someone was talking about you: hhhh yeah

[19] met someone who changed you: mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm


[20] found out who your true friends are: hh yeah


[21] kissed someone on your Facebook list: ive only kissed two people ever and theyre both BLOCKED AS FUCK

🌻 GENERAL…


[22] how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: (sidenote: i dont like the term “real life” when talking abt friends bc just bc u have ldrs doesnt mean u dont know the person in ‘real life’ bc u do. but i know what its asking so im just gonna answer that) 3... because i panicked and deleted almost everyone off my friends list


[23] do you have any pets: i have a cat named Pico de Gato

[24] do you want to change your name: legally? yeah. but idk im ok w my name(s) rn


[25] what did you do for your last birthday: hhhhh I CRIED BC NOBODY WAS ABLE TO HANG OUT AND I SAT IN MY ROOM ALONE but then the other day my friend brought me weed as a belated bday present so whatever

[26] what time did you wake up: 6 am


[27] what were you doing at midnight last night: sleepin

[28] name something you cannot wait for: GREEN DAY AND AGAINST ME CONCERT NEXT MONTH!


[29] when was the last time you saw your mother: oh god last summer i think im not sure


[30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: not having bpd and ruining all of my relationships

[31] what are you listening to right now: against me bc i remembered the concert for #28...

[32] have you ever talked to a person named Tom: i went to middle school w someone named tom and i had him in social studies and he wrote a song for a class project on guitar except it was really bad 


[33] something that is getting on your nerves: this one kid i kind of know thats.. actualyl terrible i want them to die....


[34] most visited website: tumblr/youtube 


[35] elementary: idk what these are actually asking but i... think its asking where... i started to kindergarten at a school in south dakota, and then a different school here from then until 2nd grade; 3rd grade in texas; 4th in rochester, minnesota and 5th in winona, minnesota


[36] high school: currently in rn and it sux


[37] college: either going to a technical school here to get a degree as a diagnostic medical sonographer or going somewhere??? to get a phd in psych to be a clinical psychologist. prolly the former tho,,

[38] hair colour: black but rly badly dyed


[39] long or short hair: idk its like to my shoulders when its down but also i have a mohawk


[40] do you have a crush on someone: YEA IM RLY GAY FOR MY BF

[41] what do you like about yourself: my eyes and Musical Abilities(TM)


[42] piercings: idk i dont really want any,,


[43] blood type: idk ??
??????????????

[44] nickname: roxy (if that counts..), kasp, rox, friendly ghost


[45] relationship status: IM LVOE DIRK


[46] zodiac sign: picses/aries


[47] pronouns: god i dont fucking know.. any?? except if we’re not close u cant use she/her but. yeah idk. any.


[48] fav TV show: hm twd probably


[49] tattoos: i dont have any, BUT
 im going to get a bike helmet? idk where yet though. and then just those plastic vampire teeth, and finally, the Most Important one, the word ‘drown’ in morse code on the inside of my left arm. im gonna?? try to meet tyler joseph and have him write it for me.

[50] right or left handed: right

🌻 FIRST…


[51] surgery: i had surgery on my tongue in like 1st/2nd grade bc i couldnt like. lift it up


[52] piercing: none


[53] best friend: a girl named zaneb

 
[54] sport: uhhh i tried to do bmx for a while but ive never been in a sport rly until now if u count colorguard


[55] vacation: hm my familys always been poor so like. we’ve only gone to texas and south dakota to see family


[56] pair of trainers: wh.. what

🌻 RIGHT NOW…


[57] eating: nothing but i just ate a cookie i baked. also i know this isnt what it asked but i just want to say ive ate 7 tacos in the past 3 day.


[58] drinking: ALRIGHT i started writing this post like 4 hours ago but im still drinking that monster


[59] I’m about to: nut

[60] listening to: against me


[61] waiting for: dirk to come online?????


[62] want: dirk to come online?????


[63] get married: probably not..


[64] career?: diagnostic medical sonography or clinical psychologist

🌻 WHICH IS BETTER…


[65] hugs or kisses: hugs... kissing is honestly disgusting and ngl like 95% of the time ive kissed anyone i just found it Gross dskfjds;ld


[66] lips or eyes: eyes.....


[67] shorter or taller: ok i dont actually care either way but listen. dallon weekes is 6′4′’ and he can W R E C K  M E


[68] older or younger: i dont care but i usually just happen to like ppl older than me? but not by much like a year at most


[69] romantic or spontaneous: both


[70] nice arms or nice stomach: idc s’all cute


[71] sensitive or loud: idk both but at different times??

[72] hook up or relationship: relationship...


[73] troublemaker or hesitant: idk..

🌻 HAVE YOU EVER…


[74] kissed a stranger: god no. i tried once when i was 12


[75] drank hard liquor: yeah but i was depressed and we dont talk about that period of my life

[76] lost glasses/contact lenses: i dont.. wear them.

[77] turned someone down: i dont think so... nobody is interested in me ever lmao

[78] sex on first date: GROSS


[79] broken someone’s heart: i dont think so


[80] had your own heart broken: yeah

[81] been arrested: ....listen


[82] cried when someone died: no


[83] fallen for a friend: hm i dont think so. unless u count dirk but i had a crush on him like immediately

🌻 DO YOU BELIEVE IN…


[84] yourself: every other wednesday


[85] miracles: eh

[86] love at first sight: no but i think u can kinda have a connection at first sight. like a “i know im going to love you” at first sight.

[87] santa claus: yeah ofc


[88] kiss on the first date: hh it depends idk


[89] angels: i am an angel so like

🌻 OTHER…


[90] current best friend’s name: i never have like actual best friends bc nobody likes me but idk ill go out on a limb and say martin


[91] eye colour: blue


[92] favourite movie: the labyrinth or heathers or little shop of horrors. or book of mormon if we pretend thats a movie

im too lazy to tag people i am SORRY if u wanna do this then say i tagged u tho!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11