#soft!psycho jon

[remosdeerica]

I wrote a thing while bored at work. If you don't wanna click the link it's all here>>>>

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Jon loved Damian. He loved him more than anything. More than Ma's apple pie, more than warm sunny days, more than flying. More than life itself. 

Rationally, Jon could see how that might be a problem for his parents. They got married thinking they would have to adopt if they ever wanted children; human and Kryptonian genes were just too incompatible to conceive a child. The fact that Jon existed at all was a miracle, one that he knew his parents had tried and failed to replicate. 

But Jon couldn’t help it. Damian was everything to him. Damian was the reason he got out of bed in the morning, the reason he was able to face each and every day with a smile. He was the reason Jon became Superboy. Damian was his whole world.

You've only known him for a couple of months. 

You're too young to know what real love is.

He's your first real friend, you're just a little overexcited.

Just some of the things his parents had said to him when Jon had told them his feelings for Damian. They thought it was a phase. 

Until The Hunter showed up. 

One of the many assassins Ra's al Ghul periodically sent after his grandson, the Hunter was meticulous. Vicious. Once he set his sights on his prey there was nothing on earth that could make him give up the hunt.

The day the Hunter caught Damian was one of the worst of Jon’s life. Seeing his love strung up by his wrists like a piece of meat ready to be devoured was an image that would haunt him to his dying day.  

What wouldn't haunt him, however, was the feeling of satisfaction he got as he looked into The Hunter's terrified eyes while plunging his fist through his stomach, pulverizing his insides. 

His father and Uncle Bruce had been the ones to find them after the fact. With Damian still unconscious and held protectively in Jon's blood-soaked embrace.  They never did find The Hunter's body.

Needless to say, they didn't think his feelings for Damian were 'just a phase' after that.

His parents blamed Damian for Jon's behavior, saying he was dangerous and a bad influence. Uncle Bruce himself begrudgingly agreed though he argued that Damian simply wasn't adjusted to 'normal life' yet. 

It infuriated Jon. How dare they? Damian was perfect. Jon was more than old enough to make his own decisions. And the decision to kill The Hunter was his and his alone. Damian hadn’t even been conscious for the confrontation for crying out loud! 

Jon made sure to inform his parents of this fact. He wanted to make them understand that Damian was not some evil corrupter. Jon would have killed to protect anyone he loved. With Damian, he was just a little more brutal. 

That conversation landed his butt firmly in therapy. 

Obsessive, his therapist, Ms. Tate called him. Codependent. Overly attached. Unhealthily fixated. 

Jon remained bitter and agitated during their sessions. Refusing to give an inch. Jon didn’t see what was so wrong with protecting Damian. Damian was his. And Jon would do whatever it took to keep him safe. Ms. Tate did not seem to like this answer. 

Apparently, Ms. Tate had suggested that his parents keep Jon separated from Damian for a while. That some time apart might help Jon find balance in his everyday life. 

It did the exact opposite.  

His parents hadn't explicitly told him that he wasn't allowed to see Damian. Being a whole city away from him meant they couldn't spend as much time together as they liked anyway. And his phone and computer privileges had been revoked, on account of the, well, murder. So, not seeing Damian hadn't been a surprise. It wasn't pleasant, especially after what Damian had gone through, but he figured it would be temporary. 

Two weeks after the incident his parents revealed that they had no intention of letting him see Damian at all. 

To be honest, Jon doesn't really remember what happened. One minute he was arguing with his parents, the next he was waking up strapped to a bed in one of the Watchtower's containment cells, red sun lamps glaring down on him. 

His parents watched him through the observation window as he struggled against his restraints. How could they betray them like this? They were his parents! They were supposed to love him! Why were they hurting him?

For weeks they kept Jon in that cell. Strapped down and bathed in the red glow of the lamps. After the first few days, his anger had died down, leaving him feeling hollow. Numb. 

His parents came and went, never entering the room. Only observing him through the window. He was pretty sure he saw Uncle Bruce once or twice, with his deeply set frown and stiff shoulders. And he had a vague sense that Kon had tried to fight his way into the cell to see him, though ended up being convinced by the Justice League to go back to Titan Tower. He may have been dreaming that last part up, though. It was hard to tell.

Jon just wanted to see Damian. He wanted to hear his voice. See one of his rare but heart-stopping smiles. To feel his calloused fingers thread through his as they held hands. That's all he wanted. Damian was all he ever wanted.

But that was looking more and more like it would never happen. 

Until one night, Jon was abruptly awoken by a hand jostling his shoulder. 

"Jon."

"Jon!"

"Come on, Hayseed. Wake up!"

Hayseed? Only Damian called him Hayseed…

Jon bolted up in bed as far as his restraints would let him. 

"Damian!?"

Damian was dressed head to toe in black with a mask covering the bottom half of his face. 

"Who else, Jon?"

Jon stared at him in wonder, even with half of his face covered, Damian was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. 

"You came for me…."

Damian slowly raised his hand to rest on Jon's cheek.

"Of course, Beloved. I would never abandon you."

Tears of love and gratitude pooled in Jon's eyes. 

"I love you, Dami."

Damian’s eyes softened.

"And I, you."

[writtenfromhawkins]

I think ❛ what slasher do you think you could take? in a fight, i mean. ❜ with stoner Jonathan would be really fun

hi, friend! you are so right about that. this is very unserious, hope you enjoy it. it's short, but i had fun with it.

ship: jonathan byers x fem!reader

summary: a post-movie night smoke session brings up an interesting question.

word count: 0.4k

warnings: drugs/drug use, some brief suggestive thoughts. if i missed anything, please let me know and i'll add it.

psycho killer, qu'est-ce que c'est?

Sprawled out on Jonathan's bed, your limbs impossibly intertwined, your fingers brush as you pass him the joint. No words are spoken—they can't be, your lungs are filled with smoke.

You only exhale moments later when they start to burn. You feel good. Warm, fuzzy, relaxed.

With a doting mother and an always-present younger sibling, it wasn't often that the two of you got the Byers' house to just yourselves and you intended to take full advantage of that.

For some young lovers that meant doing some decidedly X-Rated things and, sure, maybe that'd come later in the night. But for you two, most definitely not your typical couple, it just meant marathoning the Friday The 13th franchise and enjoying some Purple Palm Tree Delight.

"Baby?" His voice is soft, husky. One word and you're practically melting.

"Yeah?

"Which slasher do you think you could take?"

It's a loaded question and one with no real good answer. You don't know why but the first name to pop into your mind is Freddy Krueger. With those claws, he has to be ruled out. Leatherface is an only slightly better option. But maybe from behind—

"What is that look on your face?"

When you turn, Jonathan is propped up on his elbows, looking at you. Joint hanging precariously from the corner of his lips, he has to contort his facial muscles to talk without dropping it.

His eyes light up with realization. "Oh, you pervert."

You don't get the chance to defend yourself before he's grabbing the pillow under his head and whacking you with it. You let out an indignant noise, rightfully offended, before you're stealing it, tucking it beneath you.

"I meant in a fight."

"Oh. Oh." Now you had to consider totally different factors. "You go first. I gotta really think about this."

His eyes roll towards the ceiling but he appeases you anyway. "Krueger, for sure. You wanna get in my head? My dreams?" He scoffs. "Good luck with that, dude."

That gets a laugh out of you but you grow somber quickly. No matter how you think of it, regardless of the adversary or the situation, there is no option where you're the final girl.

"I don't know, Jon," you say, tone downright sorrowful. "I don't think I can take any of them. I'm probably just the hot girl who gets killed ten minutes in."

You expect your boyfriend to come to your honor, to agree that yeah, you're a total babe, but you're also badass—you could take on every bad guy in every universe with one hand tied behind your back.

Those assurances never come and you look at him, ready to complain, but stop yourself. His cheeks are flushed, his eyes hooded and he's staring at you. Really staring.

"The hot girl? Yeah," he agrees, "I can totally see that."

—

[dreamerwithapen1]

Lara Fayne + Relationships (Part 2)

The current ruler of Black Rock is Lady Lara Fayne, the first ever woman to sit at the head of House Fayne, though it was done out of necessity, not choice. The previous Lord of Black Rock, Haelan Fayne (Lara’s father), was slain during the War of the Five Kings along with his heir Holden Fayne, so with her father and brother dead and no other living relatives, Lara had no choice but to assume the title of Lady. However, much to everyone’s surprise, Lady Lara Fayne is proving to be an extremely strong, cunning leader who is determined to do whatever it takes to ensure her people’s safety and survival as the cruel and ruthless House Bolton begins their invasion in the North.

[rick-rayson]

a request pleasejonathan crane x reader, how would jonathan (and the batyfamily) react if jason falls in love with the reader, but the reader only wants her boyfriend jonathan

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A/N: There are several versions of Scarecrows character, and most incarnations have him as an adult, the same applies to Jason so I'll be going with their older roles.

Also I wrote this in an indented style.

This is greatly rushed ngl, but I hope it still works!

WARNING(S): Minor arguing.

TAG(S): Slight Angst.

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"How would the Batfamily react if Jason fell in love with Reader, but R only wants her boyfriend, Jonathan Crane."

➯ Jason loved you dearly, so much so that he'd found himself, on more than one occasion, dreaming about you with a softness he knew not the existence of. You made him feel delicate, vulnerable like glass. He adored this feeling just as much as he feared it. A guy like him could love? He felt unready, undeserving. But there was no one else he'd rather be unready with than you. To put it simply Jason Todd was in love, and nothing made him more elated then when he realized he was in love with you.

➯ However, Jason was not unfamiliar with being used as the worlds personal chew toy. There would always exist a looming fear, whispered 'what if's and lurking 'maybe not's.

➯ To his misfortune, you were already taken. Long before he mustered up the courage to accept his feelings, you already had someone. It hurt more than words could ever say. But being the decent human he was, Jason respected that immediately.

➯ However, one day he was feeling bold, a stroke of extroversion dripping from his words as he said, "So who's the lucky someone? Think they could come to dinner tonight?"

➯ When Jason asked that question, never did he or the rest of the Batman Family expect you to actually answer, nor did they expect you to bring your significant other that night. But what was the most appalling, was who you brought. Jonathan Crane.

➯ "Are you insane?! You brought a psycho killer into the manor?!" Jason was absolutely flabbergasted, he closed his heart when it came to your affections.. because you loved a renowned criminal over him? His heart was shattering. It wasn't fair.

➯ "I love him, Jason!" "He's taken innocent lives, Y/N!"

➯ Jason on most occasions, found himself at odds with the Batfamily, but this? They agreed with him. The moment Jonathan Crane entered the room the air grew cold. No, no they couldn't allow this. They'd rather you bring home a petty criminal than someone the likes of the Scarecrow. Dinner is cut short and cruel words are exchanged in full.

➯ The only way they'd even think of accepting your relationship with Jonathan would be if he'd let go of the criminal life. If not then you'll find your relationships with them strained.

➯ But they couldn't deny, the soft and adoring gaze Jonathan had painted in his eyes when he'd look at you. "It's fine, we can have dinner at home tonight if you'd like." He snaked a hand to your waist before he grabbed your coat for you. Before leaving, Jonathan spared a glare to Jason, in his eyes was amusement mixed with caution. Even a blind man could tell the man was also in love with you. But Jonathan would not let up, he'd risk it all if it meant he could stay with you.

➯ The Batfamily looks to Jason in pity. They were aware of his feelings before he was. The nights he'd stay up just to await for a message from you, the little trinkets and charms he'd gift you whenever he came back to the manor. The way you made him feel alive. It all dulled down as you kissed Jonathan and left without another word spoken.

➯ "That man is trouble." Jonathan mutters between the skin on your neck, he pressed a kiss to your jaw, eyebrows knit in confusion at the sound of your laugh.

➯ "You two have something in common then, no?" You swayed in his arms for a moment before he spoke up once again.

➯ "In more ways than one, I'm afraid." Your lips parted, but he pressed on with an emotion unknown to you gleaming in his eyes. "He looks at you the same way I do.. however."

➯ "I only look at you this way." You brought his forehead to yours, your eyes filled to the brim with melting adoration.

➯ "It'll only ever be you, Jon."

[rhaenyra-first-of-her-name]

Hello!! Popped by to request your insight on the constant “Sansa Antis are Misogynists uwu” tirades lol. Isn’t it extremely hypocritical of them to be accusing others of misogyny when it is them who hate on characters, especially dany & arya for actions which would’ve been lauded to the moon and back if the two were not girls and instead had been, say, a Daeron and an Artos? Talking about soft power and all that jazz lmao as if they can comprehend on what soft power *actually* means. It’s always “oh those two are loved and they’d be nothing without her dragons/fancy sword” and I’m here being all…..Mate??? Did they not teach you how to…..read???? Really, i find it quite baffling and i really wish to know your thoughts on this.

P.S boy your metas are just *chef’s kiss*

Nonnie, aren't you a sweetheart? You just made my day, thank you.

It's the height of hypocrisy, nonnie.

At this point, I can't complain about it enough.

This is same part of the fandom that came up with theories of Mad Queen!Dany, Dark!Dany, Dany burns the Water Gardens/KL, Pol!Jon (for a rape victim nonetheless 🤮), Dany dies in childbirth (but of course, of a daughter who doesn't get to inherit the crown 😑), Psycho!Arya, Murder Baby!Arya, Bodyguard!Arya for QitN Sansa, Arya dies on and wargs to Nymeria and serves Sansa, etc.

Need I say more? Feminist, my ass.

Not only this but they judge all the women on how much they can conform to the patriarchal idea of feminity, how fertile a woman is (🤮) and obviously hyperfocusing on the romantic arcs but only the 'good' women deserve those, not women like Dany or Arya.

They don't even spare the minor female characters- Margaery, Meera, etc.

This is just plain old sexism and misogyny. There's no doubt about it.

With the rate how this fandom woobify the male characters (Jaime Lannister, Sandor Clegane, Stannis Baratheon, etc); I will bet my entire inheritance that this fandom would kiss the ground Dany and Arya walked if they were men instead. Although their girlhood is a part of their arcs, credit for where it's due.

Nonnie, this side of fandom is famous for using words above their reading level and not even googling them. Soft power is just a new clutch for them.

Just saw a post the other day that a good Queen shouldn't interact with her people, criticising Arya. These people don't know what they're talking about.

If anyone could provide me book quoted of these soft power of Sansa, that would be great but till then, I haven't seen much in the department. Just like I haven't seen Sansa antis being as bad as Dany antis despite what many Stansas say.

The dragon and sword comment is obviously due to the lack of basic reading comprehension, unwillingness to engage with a text in a faithful manner just bcoz their fav isn't the main character, plain old jealousy and projection.

They know Sansa have nothing important (especially in their eyes) going on for her so the only solution they have is to diminish the achievements of other character.

If Sansa can't have it, they feel no one else should. Only Sansa deserves to be the greatest.

They're such an insecure bunch of people. They need to constantly bring down others to uplift their favs.

I also do question what where they doing in school if they can't grasp basic reading comprehension, Nonnie.

It makes more sense for it to be wilful ignorance and denial. The lack of self awareness is definitely astonishing.

[faakeid]

I am new kaisoo Supporter.

I am very logical person & I don't get convinced easily. After I saw almost all theories and analysis.

Kaisoo Supporters have always presented theories and analysis without any fake scenarios.

It was all based on true events & moments.

That's make them "real" than any other "ships created for entrainment purpose only."

That's why they are getting new Supporters.

Because to consider them real you have to keep your homophobia aside and your eyes and brain open.

(I am not a native English speaker sorry for my bad English.)

Kai/Soo is the obvious real ship.

S*M behaviour all the damn time + Theories and analysis + Kaisoo treatment given to eachother Vs other members = kai/Soo is real.

It's easy, people are acting dumb, deaf and blind and mainly homophobic.

I found my self doubting sometimes to but i seen some unexplainable things from them that no other ships have done it made me support them more i really hope their relationship can make it through all the trials and tribulations they faced and will have to face im shocked a whole 10 year relationship under all their circumstances not even supposed straight industry relationships can do that hopefully they can live there truth one day

There are a LOT of weird coincidences involving those two. Just to mention a few:

Kd predebut photos (especially the sandwich one);

The way the otp was born (there’s a post I did regarding their origins as an otp);

A few members reactions towards them (especially S*ho and CY and a bit of BH too);

How KS is adamant into slapping the other members on screen (HARD) but with JI is less expressive;

JI had an habit of slapping members while he laughed but he hardly did it with KS;

That time where they were super close to each other until they saw a fan filming them and they had to change positions to fit bro narrative;

HOW TO EXPLAIN THIS IN A BRO WAY;

And this (you can ignore the words but the images talk for themselves, byeeee);

All the times they were backstage giving each other massage (known as a zone we don’t let people we don’t know get close with);

How confession was a song Jon*gin wrote and it doesn’t talk about women but uses mostly masculine traits (like a deep voice);

All the ways Jon*gin mentioned he loved Kyu*ngsoo;

How KD (mostly JI) and the other members calls them Dika;

How little they were paired up together in almost ten years of promotions;

In other hand, the ways Lotte promoted Kaisoo, SM shakes;

The whole mess involving ka*stal;

The awkward way KD behaved towards each other during April 1st and a few days afterwards;

How the timeline between the same sex couple and KD match (kd being weird around august - sept around the time the rumor between the couple was revealed and how it was brought up again a few days before april 1st);

How they always mentioned themselves as the members who got the closest after a short time but, at the same time, they never openly said they were like brothers or best friends (JI’s besties are Ta*min and Moo*kyu);

They hanging out at Valentine’s day only the two of them???? In the evening???????;

How media seemed adamant into taking pictures only of the two of them;

Including sports seoul;

That time KS changed “Nothing on You” pronoum from girl to boy (when the original song had girl);

How KS’s first love narrative fits JI;

That day KS had a problem with his zipper and JI... closed it for him??????;

A preview of a constirpated bro ???;

That time where JI mentioned he spent his bday with R*vi and Moo*kyu but didn’t mention KS at all when, in reality, he was the only member there;

How to explain any of this?;

And this?

More for y’all;

AAAAAAAAAAAAA

All the times they said the cutest compliments towards each other;

All the times JI (and KS too aknowledge KD shippers in concerts);

SEXUAL TENSION;

How they hold hands <3;

The weird reactions regarding jagi;

JAGI THE ORIGINAL;

Soft stares;

Xi*min at a call with KS and JI’s voice on the background. Funny that later, when they reunited, they weren’t together even the voice is totally JI’s...

How the bros know they took showers when they were supposdely to live in different floors;

List of couple or same items, shoes and accessories

I could make a list with more stuff but this is enough and I feel like I wouldn’t be able to finish it today. In any case, meanwhile, haters just are loud psychos who love to brag about their faves being straight bc of media couples and bc the other makes straight dramas.

[megsironthrone]

Take You As My Wife

Based on this request:  may I please get a Ramsay request where the reader is a stark and they fell in love while he was married to sansa so after sansa leaves he agrees to leave winterfell and go back to the dreadfort if he could have the reader as his wife happy ending please thank you so much for your time i love your blog by the way

Here you are! This took so flipping long since I have to tone down Ramsay’s psycho side to write any type of fluff for him!

*Characters are not mine. Neither are you!

Warnings: A little angst. A little fluff. Ramsay being Ramsay. And I changed some of the show events in order to make the fic work. 

Pairings/Characters: Ramsay Bolton x fem!Stark reader, Sansa, Jon. 

Why Lord Baelish promised Sansa to Ramsay instead of you, Ramsay would never know. You were the eldest Stark daughter. Still, Ramsay would take what he could get to keep his place in Winterfell. When Sansa practically begged him to let you stay with her, he almost said no. Perhaps he should have. Despite all his efforts, Ramsay found himself in an odd situation.

         Ramsay was supposed to wooing Sansa. He was supposed to play her like a fiddle and convince her that their marriage would be the best thing for both Houses. He counted on it, but he hadn't counted on you worming your way into a heart that he thought was long since hardened and cold. Ramsay could honestly say that he was falling in love. With the wrong damn sister.

         Your eyes were glued to Ramsay as Sansa spoke to Lady Walda. "No, Lady Bolton. Winterfell has always been my home. It is the people who are strange." Roose's lips turned down as he looked at his son only to find his eyes on you as well. "Lord Ramsay, perhaps you could take time from your business to show us around Winterfell?" you interjected suddenly, easing the tension in the room, "I have noticed a few changed you've made."

         Ramsay, after finally meeting his father's gaze, agreed. Sansa declined. "Then I suppose it will be just the two of us," Ramsay stated with a twinkle in his eye. Finally, a moment alone with you. The young man wanted to slap himself. What was wrong with him? What was it about you that had him so obsessed? "Wonderful. Perhaps, if Sansa is feeling better later, she will join us." You rose gracefully, prompting Ramsay to join you.

         "I see you, you know," you stated simply when the two of you were finally alone. Ramsay stopped walking and arched a brow. "What do you mean, my lady?" You let a smile grace your lips. A smile that Ramsay hated. It was too bright. Too cheery. "I see you looking at me. You should be more careful or people will begin to think you are already being unfaithful to my sister."

         "I am the future lord of Winterfell now. I don't care what anyone has to say. And if they even think about engaging in idle gossip, I will carve out their tongues. What do you have to say to that?" You let out a soft hum, but didn't otherwise answer. Instead, you looked up into his eyes with a smirk. Once your eyes met his, Ramsay knew that for the first time ever, he was willing to do anything for someone other than himself.

*time skip brought to you by Hodor*

         Ramsay was utterly confused. Sansa, the woman he'd married just a few hours before, was gone along with Reek. She was gone and Ramsay didn't feel a thing. He hadn't consummated the marriage, but he didn't seem to care. The only thing he cared about was you. He was confused as to why you hadn't left with your sister. He was confused as to why she had so willingly left you behind. He hadn't even done much to her yet…other than the thing with your brothers and arranging a marriage with her after basically burning Winterfell to rubble. But you weren't part of that, so why leave you?

         When Ramsay asked, you simply gave him that little smile that he hated(loved) and a shrug. "There must always be a Stark in Winterfell. Father and Mother always used to say that. Sansa will return, most likely with an army." Ramsay rose a brow and asked what you meant. "If I know Sansa, she will head North to the Wall. She will convince Jon to come to Winterfell and take it back. If I were you, I wouldn't wait around."

         Ramsay didn't listen to you. He sat smugly in Winterfell, awaiting the moment when Jon would ride to Winterfell. Ramsay looked forward to thrashing Jon soundly, especially now that he was officially Lord of Winterfell, having killed his own father. His only hesitation was you. How you would feel about him if he killed your bastard brother.

         "At least let me speak to Jon," you pleaded with Ramsay. "If I can convince him it isn't worth it, perhaps he will stand down." Ramsay contemplated for a moment before nodding. He knew it wouldn't work, but if it made you happy and trusting, then he would do it.

         As it turned out, you were both right. Sansa did indeed ride to the Wall and convince Jon to come take back Winterfell. And, as Ramsay had said, Jon did not respond well to your pleas. Now, you were perched on Jon's horse in front of him while Jon and Ramsay spoke of terms.

         "This doesn't have to end in bloodshed," Jon said. Ramsay didn't answer at first. His gaze was fixed on you. He was close to losing you. Close to having everything stripped away from him again. He had to think of something and quickly. "Leave Winterfell now and I will tell my men to stand down," Jon continued. Ramsay saw your eyes pleading with him to see reason.

         "Why should I?" Ramsay asked, finally taking his eyes off you. "Because it will be the end of House Bolton if you don't. In a few years, no one will even remember your House existed. We will name another the Lord of the Dreadfort and you will be forgotten. Is that really what you want?" Ramsay pondered for a moment before a smirk crossed his lips. He had an idea. One that would keep him alive, give him what he wanted, and let him keep at least a small tie to Winterfell.

         "I will concede, Jon Snow. On one condition." Your head tilted in confusion. It was clear you hadn't expect him to give in so easily. "What is that?" Ramsay glanced at you again. "The lady Y/N is to accompany me back to the Dreadfort. As Lady Bolton." Your eyes widened in surprise and Ramsay continued.

         "As Lady Sansa and my marriage was never consummated, I am free to marry another. I want Lady Y/N." Jon opened his mouth to speak, but you whispered something to make him stop. Jon frowned, but nodded. "I do not like it, but it is Y/N's choice. If she agrees, you have a deal." Ramsay arched a brow as he waited for your response. "I will give you an answer in one hour." Jon turned his horse around, leaving Ramsay dumbfounded.

         To say Ramsay was irate was an understatement. An hour. Why couldn't you just say yes? You would be saving you family and your home, and getting a husband all at once. Who did you think you were? "I think I am the woman holding your future in the palm of my hand," came your voice from behind him. Ramsay hadn't realized he'd been ranting aloud.

         "What do you mean?" You smirked. "I mean, depending on my answer to you, you will either leave Winterfell alive or you will die here." Ramsay scoffed. "Your brother's army is no match for mine." Despite his feelings for you, he wasn't about to let you see him flustered. "Please. You may have the numbers but your men are idiots. I managed to sneak passed them all to get here. Jon has Wildlings on his side and a giant."

         Ramsay rolled his eyes. He was getting nowhere and it was beginning to irritate him. "Is there a point to this, my lady?" You let that damned smile grace your lips again. "There is. Before I give you my answer, I have a question." Ramsay motioned for you to continue. "Why? You married Sansa already. Why would you insist on taking me as your wife?"

         "As I told your brother, my marriage to Sansa was never consummated." You shrugged. "Ramsay, cut the bull. I already know the answer to my question. I simply want to hear you say it. Even if I never hear the words from you again after this moment, I need to hear them now." Your voice lost its power as you spoke and you cast your glance down to your feet.

         Ramsay contemplated lying to you. He really did. But if you already knew, then there was no point. "I care for you." You looked up at him, waiting for him to continue. When he didn't, you shook your head with a smile. "The actual words, Ramsay. Until I hear them, you will not get your answer." Ramsay cursed you for being so observant and stubborn. How was he supposed to admit how he felt when he'd never felt that way before.

         "Iloveyou," he mumbled. You laughed softly. "Close enough. I shall return with your answer in a few moments." You turned to walk away, but Ramsay grabbed your elbow. Before you could say a word, he spun your around and crashed his lips onto yours. There was nothing gentle about it. It was as if Ramsay were claiming you. He was rough and fierce and fiery.

         You were panting when he finally let you breathe again. "I need your answer now." You gave a breathless giggle. "So impatient. Very well. We leave tonight." It took Ramsay a moment to register what you'd said. "Y-You are willing to return to Dreadfort with me?" You sighed deeply before you pressed a much softer kiss to his lips. "Yes. Now, I must return to Jon. I will return shortly to prepare to leave."

         Ramsay watched you go with a smirk on his face. Despite everything he had done, you were still willing to go with him. He didn't know if it was because you loved him in return or if you were only doing it to save your family, but he found he didn't actually care. In the end, he got what he wanted anyway. And now you were his. For the rest of your lives, you were his and he would fight through all Seven Hells to keep you with him.

(This took me so much longer than it should have. I struggled with this one, I’m afraid.) 

Forever Tags: @fizzyxcustard​ @brewsthespirit-blog​ @ghostie-writes​ @princessofthefandomrealm​ @smalltownbigheart​ @littlemisscaptainfandom​ @etherealpotter​ @line-viper​ @frozenhuntress67​ @cd1242​ @gruffle1​ @gameofthronesfics​ @igotmadskills​

[alexa-crowe]

A 2004 Kid Watches GoT S1E1

That’s me, I just finished watching the very first episode of Game of Thrones. I was live Tweeting, but now I’m going to ruminate using my Tweets before watching episode 2.

First off, there’s a lot of problems with this show. It’s nothing obvious, but I feel like I need to say it because it’s a big problem: there’s a lot of unnecessary nudity of women. Sure, the actresses are consenting, but that doesn’t make it right. Just because a character is nude doesn’t mean the camera needs to show her boobs or naked body for fuck’s sake. Maybe if men were also nude as much it wouldn’t be so bad, but they aren’t. The writers of Game of Thrones sexualized women, which is abhorrent and disgusting. They “had” to age up the characters for nudity and sex scenes that were either unnecessary scenes or could not display nude bodies! It’s, quite frankly, disappointing. I just needed to get all that out.

Onto my actual thoughts of the first episode.

YO WHY TF DID THE NIGHT KING HAVE A HORRIBLE DEATH SEQUENCE WHEN THE WHITE WALKERS WERE LITERALLY THE FIRST PLOT THREAD INTRODUCED & THEREFORE THE MOST IMPORTANT?????? (like seriously, wtf. he’s literally the main villain of the story!!)

(okay but like what is the symbolism for?????)

oh lawd Arya is a feisty one and Bran’s super soft oh fuck I love: them. (YOU HEAR THAT?? I LOVE THEM!)

Jon, bby, ur a real Stark. (but seriously he’s literally a Stark. his mom’s Lyanna he’s legit a Stark lmfao no infidelity here, Cat.)

Oh shit NED U BETTER NOT—YOU BETTER BE THE “winter is coming that means white walkers” TYPE OR I WILL RESCIND MY MISPLACED DEVOTION TO YOU.

Omg direwolves i’m OMG JON’S A SMART ONE! HA! WHOULDA THUNK?

Lol Jon’s a real Stark fuck off Theon

If I have to watch Cersei and Jaime be romantic or sexual istg i’m gonna throw up a little in my mouth.

Please don’t hit me w twincest in the first episode prayers as I take a bathroom break (they hit me with the twincest 😭)

Also, King’s Landing is soooo beautiful!

*squeals in Jaime-gasm*

ah...ahaha... He’s so hot i’m STOP LOOKING AT CERSEI JUST STOP STOP STOP IF HE MAKES ANY SORT OF LOOK OF LOVE AT HER I’M GONNA LOSE MY APPETITE.

Oomf me ser why is he so hot my GOD BRIENNE IS SO LUCKY 🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵 KBDJDVSIBSJDBDKDBDKDNKDBDKDNDKNDKDBDJDBKDBDNDBDNDBDJD

Okay but in all seriousness, who died? *Opens character guide* ohhh ok idc abt him lol

I was about to press play but...I just wanna appreciate Jaime for a moment. You know? Just...the outfit is...damn.

Also idk if i’m ready for this conversation between Jaime and Cersei. PLAY—

HE LOOKED AT HER WITH KINDA HEART EYES AND LOVING SMIRK (VER. ONE) I’M—

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I had to pause. Idk if i’m ready to proceed. Props to Nik tho bcs damn he knows how to do heart eyes. That’s not easy.

Ok ok ok I just need to get this over with and watch it.

OHHHHHHHHHH THEY THOUGHT JON ARRYN MIGHT’VE LEARNED ABT THEM FU—FUCK—FUCKING!

Issa raven~

Cat! ❤️❤️

Oop is this actually the episode where Bran gets pushed out of a tower? I hope not cuz oof that would suuuuuuuuuck

But also foreshadowing~~~~~~ hot damn if he hadn’t climbed a lotta shit wouldn’t have gone down... Woah.......... Holy crap...

Heyyyyyyy Joffrey!

Oh shit Sansa’s got a crush on the wrong guy.

Skksks Arya turned into Aya sk

Hot damn helmet hair is too sexy. Maybe i’ll just...leave it pause...right here...

No one should be allowed to be this sexy. No one.

Teehee I made a reaction pic lol

Jaime, sister-fucker: Tyrion, I’m disappointed in you for having sex with a whore even though you’re not related.

Tyrion: -_- right. Okay. Fuck off. I love you.

lmao their relationship is really cool

My mom came in the room to talk to me and she was like, “He [Jaime] looks like a shithead.” AND THEN I MENTIONED SHREK’S PRINCE CHARMING AND SHE WAS LIKE

I REMEMBER HIM AND THEY TOTALLY LOOK SIMILAR MAYBE THAT’S WHY I THINK HE’S A SHITHEAD

BSKBDODHDJ I’M DEAD DECEASED GONE LMFAO

This Jaime is peak shithead energy lmao

BWHAHAHA that wasn’t what I expected at all didhjdhd Jaime is kind but he’s closed himself off to everyone but Tyrion 🥺🥺 poor baby 🥺🥺 even Cersei doesn’t know his true self...

God I love this show already WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE RUINED WTF

i have since rescinded my previous statement FUCK why do i care so much...

Lyanna 🥺💕💕

Dany! She’s so pretty! *Bisexual mode activated*

Unnecessary boobage  And why is there MORE incest vibes?????? WTF????? 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

Oh, Dany i’m sorry for everything that’s happened and will happen... 😔

Wait—wait lol Sansa’s only thirteen? I THOUGHT SHE WAS LIKE MY AGE AT LEAST HOLY COW WHY’S EVERONE SO FUCKIN’ YOUNG????

I feel old now lmfao

Lol they really did make Joffrey seem nice, didn’t they? 

Oomf me ser UM—right, Jaime’s back, just as hot as always—I mean...

Ned Stark with the great comeback! Jaime Lannister with the sexiest smile of the century!

HAJSHKEBE Arya and Sansa are legit me and my sister. I’m Sansa and my sister’s Arya ksksbdkdb

OH SHIT! OH SHIT LYSA KNOWS WHAT HAPPENED OH SHIT oh ohhh ohhhhhh not good

Oh no Ned...

On another topic, I did this bdjndkdjdjdn

I’m tempted to rewind to Jaime & Ned’s convo just to make another reaction picture... I don’t wanna forget so imma do it now skskks

Here’s the pic:

Wait fuck he was already making heart eyes why did I cover them up

Oh, Dany... I’m so so so so so so sorry. But now she has the dragon eggs, at least.

Bye bye Ned :’(

OMG BRAN’S CLIMBING THE TOWER EYE—I WANT TO VOMIT GOD I’M SUPPOSED TO EAT DINNER RN BUT I CAN’T BECAUSE THAT’S VILE AND DISGUSTING AND ABHORRENT AND—

Ok but the fact that they don’t sound into it makes it a bit better. Only a bit. I don’t think I can eat my Mac n Cheese for a while tho. And I love Mac n Cheese :’(

Bran’s too young for this!

Idk if I can play it...no idk I just no no no no Jaime......... 😔☹️😨😰😖😵🤢🤮🤒

OH MY GOD JAIME YOU ARROGANT, SISTER-FUCKING, KING-SLAYING, BRIENNE-MOCKING, BRIENNE-HURTING, BOY-CRIPPLING, MOTHERFUCKING BASTARD-ASS PSYCHO HOW COULD YOU TRICK HIM LIKE THAT YOU FUCKING MONSTER!

Sorry, Ser Dad, but idk if i’ll be able to look at you for an hour or so

These can go in the trash. Bye. I WANT SEASON 2+ JAIME CUZ THIS ONE SUCKS ASS

[bisexualsforprompto]

Teen Titans AU Part 6

Hi! I’m so excited I was able to update at the end of the day today (phew barely made it). Hopefully you like this chapter, it’s mostly setting up for the plot (and climax soon) but I also added some Daminette fluff. Here you go!

VI

“Are you kidding me Kori?!” Asked Damian, “We’re not going back to the tower! We have to find Deathstroke!” Starfire shook her head at Damian, internally she was freaking out, she even wished Dick was here to help her lead this. “Damian, if we go now we’ll be underprepared and Slade is aware of your rashness, he’ll be expecting us. We’ll be pummeled and Marinette will go back with that psycho.” Kori responded. Jamie nodded at Starfire’s statement and sat down on the couch with Garfield. Team meetings normally weren’t so tense and they probably wouldn’t have been if Marinette was there to keep the peace, but Kori sent her to her room. The poor girl had gone through enough and she needed sleep. Damian and Jon were understandably furious but Jon saw Kori’s point, “She’s right you know.” He turned to his friend, who had his normal annoyed expression. Jon continued, “If we try to find them now we’ll be going in blind. I don’t want to send Mari away, but they know she’s here. What should we do Starfire?” Kori thought about it, “I-“ she was interrupted by a scream, Marinette’s scream. “I’ve got it.” Damian said running as fast as he could to her room after checking the camera they put in her room just in case. Nobody was in her room, she was just having a nightmare. Damian understood, sometimes he’d have nightmares about his grandfather. But Ra’s wasn’t coming back unlike Marinette’s tormentor. He quickly opened her door and tapped her until she woke up. “Did-did I do it again Damian?” She said with tears in her eyes. “Don’t worry Marinette, he’s not coming back. And if he does I’ll kick his ass, I’d die before I let anything happen to you.” He whispered into her ear. He felt relieved that the other Titans were in a meeting and couldn’t hear him talk to Marinette. He squeezed her tightly as she sobbed into his arms. “Dam-Damian?” She said looking up at him staring at him with her wide blue eyes. He couldn’t do anything when he looked into her eyes, he was intoxicated. Bluebell eyes continued to stare at him and he looked back at her with his piercing emerald ones. “Yes malak*?” She breathed deeply before asking, “Could-could you stay with me tonight? I feel safer with you.” Damian couldn’t say no to her, he already knew that, “Yes, I will.” He remembered he was a gentleman though and added, “Where would you like me to sleep?” Marinette paused and gathered up some courage, “could you stay here?” She said motioning to the bed she was on. “Are you s-sure?” Damian asked. He didn’t know what to make of it, he knew he would never take advantage of her, but he was surprised that after the Agreste kid she wasn’t afraid of sleeping in the same bed as a boy. Marinette nodded, “I-I am. I trust you Damian.” Damian nodded back to her and laid down. He didn’t mention that she had also trusted that idiot cat partner of hers, but he knew he would never hurt her and if he did, even just emotionally, he would never forgive himself. Damian held marinette as she slowly drifted off to sleep, he ruffled her hair soothingly, “I swear nothing will ever happen to you as long as I’m alive.” He whispered and he too, fell asleep.

The morning sun peeked through the windows of Titans tower. The team, aside from Damian and Marinette were awake for most of the night. Garfield turned on the TV to see if there was any news about the whereabouts of their blonde model. If this kid was really as famous as Kori had mentioned he knew there’d be news about him, and sure enough an anchor with dark hair and chocolate skin was talking about it, with a picture of the smiling blonde model on the TV.

“If you have any tips about where Mr. Agreste might be, call this hotline right now. Now to Mindy with an interview with one of Adrien Agreste’s classmates.” Lila and the interviewer panned onto the screen as Jon walked in. Lila spoke in perfect but choppy English,

“Oh I just hope he’s found soon! I don’t know what Id do without him, we’re such great friends, unlike some people…” The interviewer took Lila’s bait, “Who would be ‘some people’?” Lila put a hand to her head dramatically, “Marinette Dupain-Cheng. She’s been obsessed with Adrien since day one, she probably kidnapped him, or worse. She was always so jealous that he’d rather spend time with me instead of-“ Jon growled at the liar on TV, “Turn it off.” He told Gar. “But-“ “Turn it OFF!” Jon yelled. Garfield obliged and the other Titans trickled into the room, except for Marinette and Damian, they were still fast asleep. “Should we wake them?” Tara asked, motioning towards the camera that was taping Marinette’s room. It showed the bluenette and Damian sleeping side by side, with Marinette’s arms placed on Damian’s chest. “No.” Kori said, if the stakes weren’t so high she would even call the display cute, “They deserve a little rest.” Tara nodded and sat next to Gar on the couch. The two had gotten much closer since Marinette arrived, Gar had even told Jamie that Tara and he had kissed. Jamie wasn’t sure what to make of it, but he was happy for his friend. The team sat on the furniture as Starfire got up to make breakfast.

Damian was awoken by the ringing of a cell phone in his pocket. “Just five more minutes.” He heard Marinette mumble. Adorable, he thought. He slowly got up from the bed and answered the phone. “Yes Alfred?” He said in a hushed whisper, as to not wake up Marinette. She sat up anyway watching Damian speak. “No? Is anyone hurt? That’s good. Yes, I think that would be a good idea… today? In TWO HOURS?! Yes, yes sorry Alfred. I’ll be there, do you mind if I bring a friend? Good. We’ll be there.” After hanging up Damian sat on the bed stroking Marinette’s soft, beautiful hair, “My family has offered us their house in Gotham for the time being until we have a good plan to find Deathstroke and Agreste. They could use a little help with Gotham villains, and I think a change of scenery might be good for you anyway...We’d leave in two hours, on a plane. Is that ok?” Marinette nodded, she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t a little happy about going with Damian to another place, far away from Adrien. She thought it would be a good distraction to meet his family. “Ok, malak. Unfortunately you’ll have to get changed and we’ll have to leave almost right away.” Marinette looked puzzled, “Damian? What does ma-malak mean? I heard you say it last night too but…” Damian chuckled a little, “It means angel in Arabic. (*courtesy of google translate) You don’t mind me calling you that do you?” He asked, suddenly self conicous. He only called her that because he thought it described her perfectly. Marinette blushed, “I don’t mind, not at all! I-I-I ummm. CHANGE! I should change!” Damian held in a smile as the bluenette sprung out of bed and ran to her bathroom.

When Marinette was safely in her bathroom, she pulled out clothes from her closet (don’t question it) and woke Tikki up from her makeshift bed in the closet (Tikki wanted to let Mari have some space). “Oh my gosh Tikki, I’m hopeless.” Tikki giggled, “Is this about Damian?” “What how’d you know?!” “It’s obvious, you look at him lovingly, he actually smiles around you…” Marinette turned fifty shades of red, “I- uhhhh. I’m going to change now!” She shut the closet again and changed quickly into some warm clothes, she didn’t know a lot about Gotham except that the weather was generally colder there. She opened her closet once more and pulled out some luggage and packed as fast as she could. She took her purse and motioned Tikki inside. She grabbed her luggage and walked out of the bathroom. She didn’t see Damian, so she assumed he went back to the main room. She headed there too. The Titans had congregated in the main room when they got wind that Damian and Marinette would be in Gotham for a while. Jon didn’t want her to leave but he knew it was safer since only the team and the batfamily knew about them leaving. He wanted Marinette to be safe above all else.

Damian had packed and gathered in the room at record speed, Marinette was close behind. “So I guess you heard…” she said. The team nodded. Marinette was never any good at goodbyes, even temporary ones. Damian looked at his watch, they would have to leave soon if they wanted to get to the airport on time. “I wish you all the best in Gotham, you two.” Kori said. “You’re going to love Gotham,” Garfield jumped in, “Very inspirational.” Marinette nodded, it was awkward, these people had seen her at her worst and seen her laugh so hard she cried. She took a deep breath, “I know it’s only temporary but I’m going to miss all of you so much.” Jon sighed, it was going to be even harder to let her leave. “Don’t worry Mari, we’ll chat all the time. Maybe video calls?” Jon looked at Damian for his approval and he nodded. “I’m sorry Marinette, I know it’s not ideal but it’s the best temporary fix we have while we come up with a plan to beat Slade and Agreste. Plus, I’m sure my family could benefit from the help of a certain spotted heroine.” That made Marinette smile slightly just like Damian thought it would, nothing cheered her up like helping others. Jon pulled Mari in for a tight hug, Garfield, Jamie, Kori, and surprisingly Raven followed suit. Tara stood by Damian and when Marinette was released from the group hug she walked up to her and gave her a small farewell and good luck hug, nothing long but Marinette could tell she cared. Damian said a quick goodbye to his team and walked out of the tower, luggage in hand, with Marinette.

Damian took the Titans smaller car that was used for personal reasons, not Titans business and drove off as the two heroes waved goodbye to their friends. Marinette looked at him as he drove, she was content to let drive in silence, it felt like she didn’t need words at all with him but then she suddenly remembered, “Damian, what villain does your family need help with?” Damian sucked in a bit of air, “The Riddler and his son, normally they’re not much of a threat, but they’ve escalated and are appearantly planning something big. My ‘sisters’ are on a girls trip so my father asked for me to come back and help.” Marinette nodded, “it’ll certainly be a desired pace from Adrien.” She seemed to wince at his name, “and I can’t wait to meet your family, if they’re as g-g-great as you I’m sure I’ll love them.” She blushed. Damian blushed too, she thought he was great! He pulled himself out of his thoughts with a coughing fit, “We’re here.” Damian said pulling up at a small airport. Damian stepped out of the car and opened the door for Marinette, causing a whole new wave of blushes. They walked into the airport together and when they were cleared through security, traveled to the gate just in time for boarding. The Wayne’s had bought them tickets in first class that were next to each other. A TV and a small set of earphones were attached to the back of the seat in front of them. Marinette took the window seat and looked out the window as the plane started to take off, she looked slightly nervous. “Is this your first time flying malak?” Damian asked. “Y-yeah, at least for the first time when I was awake.” Marinette responded. Damian placed a hand over hers, “Is this ok?” He asked. Marinette smiled, “Thank you.” They sat in a comfortable silence for a while until they experienced turbulence. Marinette shut her eyes tightly and Damian came up with an idea. “How about we watch a Movie? It’ll get your mind off the flight.” Marinette nodded and reached for an earbud as Damian reached for the other, their hands touching briefly sending sparks and blushes through the teens’ bodies. They placed their respective earbud in and Damian searched for a movie. Marinette saw her favorite on the dashboard, “How about Enchanted?” Damian looked puzzled, “Sure. I’ve never seen it but-“ Marinette looked at him with wide eyes, “You’ve never seen Enchanted?! That’s it we’re watching it.” Marinette pressed a thumb to the movie and it started to play. Marinette seemed pretty engrossed as the movie went on and Damian found himself looking more at her than the movie. Soon it was over though, and they landed. “You were right Damian, that helped a lot.” She said looking gratefully at the dark haired boy. Damian gave her a slight smile, it was nearly impossible not to smile when she was around. Damian took her hand gently and led her off the airplane, she was awed by the sight of the city and thought of new sketch ideas right away. Gar was right, the city was inspirational. Damian looked at her and her dumbfounded expression and smiled a bit more, “Welcome to Gotham Marinette.”

Tag list:

@zebrabaker (sorry I don’t understand why it’s not working).

@2sunchild2

@northernbluetongue

@mochinek0

@violatiger8

@beaversuenightly

[kattzziee]

ok so i just kinda felt like doing a thing where i explained some of the songs i currently have on my tma playlist!! all of the songs are really dope but some give off specific vibes and i wanted to share :)

there are a few songs not on here that are on my playlist, but those have a feel that’s just harder to put into words? but check it out if you’re curious! here’s a link: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5wvt20Li38IGvataElNhA7?si=gSJGcyVPTnKOgpLfvtNxwg

Oh Ana (Mother Mother)- The Eye. easy. Jon post-apocalypse and a tad Monster!Jon. i mean, with lines like Hop up on a cloud and watch the world decay how could this be anything else? also there’s a lovely tiktok with a slowed version of this that i’ll link (https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJQ2fXRf/)

Mr Loverman (Ricky Montgomery)- Jonmartin! this gives vibes of being in the statehouse post mag 159 but pre mag 160 and they’re just getting comfortable being together. it makes me soft :)

As the World Caves In (Matt Maltese)- Jonmartin again, but this one is directly post mag 160 and the world is ending around them. also just in general the sad season finales like when tim died in s3. sad but beautiful

Michelle (Sir Chloe)- oh boy. this one SCREAMS jude perry and agnes montague. unrequited (?) love and yearning

Take Me to Church (Hozier)- feral monsterfucker (or monster lover, in martin’s case). hozier is good all around for making you feel dark romantic

Wicked World (Matt Jaffe)- basira and daisy! lyrics like There’s only ten commandments, but a million ways to burn just really reminds me of the shady, but well-intentioned things they do and their whole protector vibe

Money, Money, Money (ABBA)- ELIAS. hnng this gives me smug sugar baby/rich bitch vibes. elias is definitely leeching off a peter and pulling some heavy strings with this money. 

I Can’t Decide (Scissor Sisters)- distortion helen! and michael too, but mostly helen! the whole “i want to kill you, but also not” thing is such a distortion vibe. they want jon dead but are too interested to try

Verbatim (Mother Mother)- distortion michael! the lack of gender, the character appeal, the vibes. this song has it all and it’s just spooky and vaguely threatening enough to be spiral aligned.

John My Beloved (Sufjan Stevens)- oh, martin. this is lonely!martin all the way. he’s desperate and so very alone and just wants to be loved. someone give him a hug, preferably jon

Under My Skin (Jukebox The Ghost)- isn’t this the unofficial tma theme song? either way, sick vibes on this one. nice and psycho

Burning Pile (Mother Mother)- this song gives off “jon accepting he’s a monster and will use his powers as he sees fit” vibes. this is a jon who will bust your kneecaps without a second thought if he thinks it’s necessary. another nice tiktok for this one too :) (https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJQ27D2G/)

Body Terror Song (AJJ)- take your pick! with all the body horror in this podcast, this song can really vibe with any of those moments. melanie blinding herself? the worms in jane prentiss? the melting skin of the desolation’s followers? check check and check! also here’s a nikola tiktok with this song, reminds me of when she was about to steal jon’s skin (https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJQ27CmL/)

Ship in a Bottle (fin)- lonely!martin, jon, and peter lukas! the whole ship and being lost at sea vibe is pretty obvious, but i also kinda feel some jonmartin tension. maybe a little pleading? all around a solid song

[remosdeerica]

Everybody Wants to Rule the World

Jon: Dad, come on. Of course Damian and I aren't going to take over the world.

Clark: I know, son. I-

Jon: I mean, of course we've talked about it.

Clark:

Clark: What?

Jon: Well, yeah. I'm one of the most powerful beings on the planet and Dami was literally raised to rule humanity.

Clark: Now, hold on-

Jon: And let's be honestly, we'd be a much better option than most of the other people vying for the job.

Clark: Son-

Jon: But we've discussed it and the logistics are just too complicated right now.

Clark *sweating*: Jonno-

Jon: I mean, first we'd have to decide on how to conquer the world in the first place. Like would it be through shadow Government, hostile takeover, enslavement...

Clark: Oh my g-

Jon: I thought Armageddon style might work. You know, less paperwork. But Dami's got OCD, he can't handle that kind of disorganization.

Clark: *horrified*

Jon: So, yeah. You have nothing to worry about. Dami and I have no plans to take over the world.

Clark:

Clark: T-that's.... great to hear, b-buddy.

Jon: At least not for another few years.

Clark: I'm sorry, wha-

[spooky-scary-imagines]

Could you write something sweet for Norman? ^^

((Always!  I doubt you care but I went on IMCDB so now I have to share this info. The car they drive in this is a 1947 Ford Coupe, only relevant cause this exact car was used in Psycho IV but also due to the fact that, while in the original Norman is never seen driving, every notable car in the film is a Ford due to the fact that the company was funding his television show. So know you know I’m a huge dork, and some useless trivia! Anywho, spot the movie references (Are they even references if I’m directly alluding to them lol)! Bonus points if you can figure out the film they end up seeing. ; ) Warning: This started out sweet and fluffy and it still ain’t smut but I was listening to Britney Spears when I wrote this, it gets pretty suggestive, and y’all make-out so I figured I should say something.

Business at the motel had been very good lately. While the creation of the highway had initially nearly drove the place out of business, just recently, a new factory complex had moved its central location to a town right nearby, leading to a large increase in foot traffic around the motel. While it did mean you and Norman had to work pretty hard to keep everything running tip-top, the extra spending cash laying around was a pleasant change. It allowed for nights like tonight. You and Norman had been planning a date night for awhile now, just a chance for you two to get out of the motel for bit. You had arranged for a trusted friend of yours from in town to watch the place for a bit. That way no profits would be lost, and Norman wouldn’t spend all night worrying something was happening to it.

You two decided to go to the movies together. Norman had confided in you previously that he never really got to go on dates in high-school. And how, while he didn’t mind too terribly, there was a part of him that felt like he’d missed out. So, you figured this was a nice place to start. The evening started nicely. He picked you up at the door to your room, clutching a modest bouquet, and beaming like a teenager watching his prom date descend the stairs. He fidgeted in the doorway as you found a vase for the flowers. With one last check that you had everything you needed for the evening, you headed out. You made sure your friend was all set up in the motel lobby, Norman nervously going over the rules and “Just-In-Cases” for what must have been the fifth time. You helped reassure and usher him along out to his old Ford, deciding against the sometimes 20 minute battle to get your old junker kicking. 

 When you finally reached the cineplex, the sun had begun to set, casting a warm pink over everything it’s rays could reach. The theatre was largely empty, which is what you two preferred, and why you had chosen to go on a weekday. There were a meager selection of movies to choose from, not unusual for the small town. “There’s the nuclear fallout flick with Gregory Peck?” you shot Norman a teasing glance, “I heard that heart-throb Anthony Perkins is in it…”

  “Wh-Wha-” he sputtered, “How-How about this one, it-it’s ab-bout birds. And it’s by the man who made Rope…”

You glanced at the poster for Tippi Hepburn’s debut thriller, “Mmmm, maybe…though I’ve heard it’s not very scary…and the director tends to be hit-and-miss. Oh! There’s that one comedy with Paul Newman on a chain-gang, that could be fun? Or…” you gasped, “That one!”

  “Al-alright, that could be fun. He was in The Graduate, and that was well-liked…”

You grinned and took his hand in yours as you ordered two tickets. You lead him to the snack counter and, ignoring his insistence that he be the one to pay for them, you bought him a bag of red vine licorice to nibble on throughout the movie. The man had such a sweet tooth! The theater was otherwise empty and you two made your way through the aisle til you were smack dab in the middle. As Jon Voight drove from Texas into New York on that rickety bus, you leaned against him. He stiffened under you momentarily, before relaxing into your touch, resting his head on yours.

  Some time had passed and Joe had finally met Ratso before you felt Norman’s fingertips brushing questioningly against your knuckles. You smiled and took his hand in yours. There was an awkward, but somewhat funny (at least on your end) moment during the scene in the movie theater. It was amusing to watch your boyfriend squirm in his seat and get all red in the face. Every time one of the more dirty scenes would come on, Norman’s breath would hitch a little. Even in the dark theater, you could see the tips of his ears and neck turning scarlet.

  During one of the more relaxed scenes, you leaned over the armrest and pressed a kiss underneath his jaw bone. He inhaled sharply, but kept his eyes trained on the movie.You pecked him on the cheek before trailing kisses down his neck to the collar of his shirt then back again. You felt him gulp as you made your way to his collarbone. He murmured out your name and squeezed your hand. “Uh-huh?” you whispered, “What is it, honey?” He made a keening noise low in his throat before turning and pressing his lips to yours. You couldn’t help but smile against his mouth as his hands slowly moved to cup your face. All this time together, and he still touched you like everything was his first. Your hands moved to rest on the front of his sweater and you bit at his lower lip, earning a soft and muffled moan from your boyfriend. 

In a rare move of him taking the lead, he buried his hands in your hair. The kiss deepened, and before you knew it, his tongue was in your mouth, tasting like peppermint and candy. Your hands traveled down to rest against his hips and he subconsciously bucked up into your touch, no pressure where he really wanted it. Due to the nature of the theater seats, there wasn’t much room to maneuver but you made due, practically crawling over the armrest to press against him. You broke apart for a moment to catch your breath, Norman always kissed like a man starved, taking your breath away literally. You leaned your forehead against his and chuckled against his mouth, breath coming from both of you in short pants. “Baby…” you murmured.

  “Mhmmm”

“I think the movies about to end…”

He tucked his head into the crook of of your neck, “Y-Yeah?”

   You looked up at the screen as Joe Buck closed Ratso’s eyes. “So pretty soon the light’s are gonna come on…”

Realization hit him and he whipped his head up, “Oh-oh goodness.” He hastily tried to smooth out his beshelved hair and sweater, pulling it down over his lap a bit. You giggled and brushed your fingers through your hair, you decided against telling Norman about the small hickey poking out of his shirt collar. The credits rolled and with and unspoken promise to pick-up where you left off at home, you both made your way back to the car. The car ride was a bit awkward as you tried to ignore the tension that was building as you got closer to the hotel.

  “What was your favorite part of the movie?”

“I’ll a-admit I was a l-little, erm, distracted. I couldn’t really p-pay attention.”

You gave him a wry grin, “Guess we’ll just have to go there again…”

He turned to you wide-eyed, before shaking his head and smiling. You were going to be the death of him.

[silverleafnightshade-blog]

The Eyes of Laura Mars

Released in 1978, The Eyes of Laura Mars is set in the glimmering yet gritty world of NYC haute couture fashion. Mad Magazine parodied the film as “The Eyes of Lurid Mess” and rightly so, for it definitely has plot issues and some grade-A-Virginia-ham overacting. However, director Irvin Kershner managed to capture a whiff of the cultural crossover as the NYC scene shifted from disco to punk. Often touted as the first American giallo film, The Eyes of Laura Mars tidily ticks off the boxes of the Italian genre: a mix of gorgeous and grimy settings, the gruesome murder of beautiful people, and many misdirections before the killer is finally revealed. Added to the mix is Ms. Virginia Ham herself (Faye Dunaway), a hairy Brad Dourif, and a preternaturally prehistoric Tommy Lee Jones. Dourif is only four years younger than TLJ in real life, but he looks like a bearded baby next to TLJ’s tire-treaded brow. Hell, TLJ is six years younger than Dunaway, but there’s not even a scratch of the cougar in their relationship.

Faye Dunaway of course plays the main character, a superstar high fashion photographer who begins to have disturbing visions of murder. Fun fact: the actual images of famous fashion photogs Rebecca Blake and the so-called “King of Kink” Helmut Newton were used in the film.

Speaking of kink, Barbra Streisand was offered the main role (it helped that she was dating producer Jon Peters at the time) but turned it down because she thought the film’s violent, sexual content was too out-there for her image.

The film opens with a murderous sequence, which turns out to be one of Laura’s nightmares. She awakens in her rather spare and severe bedroom,

and then wanders out to her living room, aka The Neutral Zone. Beige and brown rule the day, as does that giant rooster sculpture. From kitchen kitsch to highbrow decor? Huh. And oof, so. Much. Carpeting!

Laura flips through some negatives and tries to put the nightmare behind her. Soon, driver Tommy (Brad Dourif) is ferrying Laura off to the gala reception for a new publication of her photos. It looks like maybe the exterior was shot at one of the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s side doors. The interior looks somewhat Studio 54-inspired, though.

Hiiiiiiyyyyyeeee! I’m just a photograph, don’tcha worry.

Laura meets cute-ish with Detective John Neville (TLJ), as cute as can be when one’s publisher has been horribly murdered with an ice pick. Neville came for the questioning, but he stayed for the hors d’oeuvres, or rather, he looks a bit hungry for a Mars Bar. Laura goes home and rings up her bestie, who happens to be dating Laura’s ex-husband Michael (a very slimy yet somehow sexy Raul Julia). Everyone calms each other down, and soon enough, Laura heads off for a shoot at Columbus Circle. The concept is a bit S&M, models in lingerie and furs fighting in front of the husks of burning cars...

The concept was inspired by photog Chris von Wangenheim, and so fitting in front of what my father once called “The Devil’s Arsehole” (don’t feel special, C.C., he said that about every Washington D.C. roundabout too). The intersection didn’t get the moniker until 1892, the 400th anniversary of Columbus’s “discovery” of the New World, when a giant statue of the old man was erected. From the invention of the car on, Columbus Circle was considered a hazardous spot for pedestrians. Given the circle’s bad rap for most of the 20th century, it seems quaint to remember that Olmsted intentionally designed the traffic circle as the grand entrance to Central Park in 1857. By 1978, Columbus Circle was “roundly” (oh ho ho) derided as a dangerous thoroughfare. In 1979, architecture critic Paul Goldberger said that the intersection was "a chaotic jumble of streets that can be crossed in about 50 different ways—all of them wrong." A redesign of the circle’s aesthetics and traffic flow began in 1991, and by the Naughty-Aughties, Columbus Circle had even won a few awards for landscape architecture and urban design.

Neville shows up again at Laura’s set at Chelsea Piers. This is my favorite set in the movie, with the fabulous Sterling St. Jacques dancing around and a lot of blown-out color and drama going on.

It’s also one of our last scenes with poor Lulu and Michelle, alas. I actually quite like both of their characters, so silly and yet so sassy. They have the best outgoing answering machine message, and it made me feel so nostalgic for both answering machines, answering machine messages, and that kind of close relationship you’d have with a roommate. That is the kind of relationship that can only be built after hearing all your messages, and knowing all your secrets, unvarnished and unedited by a brunch re-telling. Sigh.

Laura’s studio is amazing - it’s enormous with tons of old windows, stunning harbor views, and some convenient soft spots that are perfect for sexy times with Neville.

Donald (René motherfucking Murat Auberjonois) is such a great character. He’s Laura’s long-suffering agent, and although at times walking the stereotypical line, he is quite comfortably un-closeted. Whenever someone tries to throw homophobic shade his way, he shines a light right up their asses. I do not love the character’s decor choices, though - a bit too Italianate for me, although who can resist a red damask wallpaper and this goddamn face? Not me, friends.

Speaking of Italian classics, Frank Adonis makes an appearance as Sal, Neville’s slightly unhinged partner. I like this shot of him surveying Laura’s apartment with a “mmm, not bad,” expression.

Frank just shuffled off this mortal coil in late 2018, R.I.P. Weird fact: although he’s the Italian guy you recognize from everything, his Wiki page is in French.

SPOILERS, sort of: Neville goes to see Tommy at his spectacularly depressing apartment, and the visit quickly takes a turn for the worse. Tommy stabs a patrolman while escaping arrest, but the Sal the psycho just opens fire on what appears to be the entire East Village, and Tommy est la morte. Neville rings up Laura to tell her the killer has been caught, and pack your bag, baybeee, they are going away! Laura begins to select some careful neutrals to coordinate with the lady Derringer gifted by Neville, when she is suddenly struck by another vision.

Poor Michael gets ‘picked in the elevator of Laura’s building, and the killer is en route to her apartment! Laura manages to lock the front door just in time. Neville soon comes crashing through the balcony window, and this is where the ending gets super giallo: as he begins babbling about Tommy’s terrible upbringing, Neville accidentally reveals that it is he, Neville, who is the killer. But it’s not really Neville! No, it’s his other personality that did the killing. That personality is also apparently responsible for how nicely Neville fills out a black turtleneck, as well as for finishing Neville’s dissertation and keeping the bills paid. The real Neville struggles back to the surface; to protect his true love, he basically shoots himself using Laura’s gun (and trigger finger, as she is holding said gun at the time). The final shot is of Laura calling the cops, and her final line? “I’m Laura Mars.” If there is any shred of happy ending to this story, it might be that she has to rip out that fucking bloodstained carpet. Maybe there’s a nice parquet floor under there? I know that hating on carpeting is low-pile fruit, but there is just no way for mere mortals to keep wall-to-wall carpeting from getting disgusting.

Interesting fact: John Carpenter wrote the spec script for this film, but Kershner’s finished product took some hot turns in the rewrite. Carpenter was still credited despite his protests, but luckily the mixed reviews didn’t affect the success of his next project, Halloween. It’s been nice to revisit some giallo, although I think I’m going to go back to the real-deal Italian giallo next month. I might also be leaving this platform, as sad as that makes me. Tumblr has been doing some bullshit flagging of posts that are very LGBTQ-unfriendly, and well, they are also buggy as hell. I had this post written a week ago but the site kept crashing as I was trying to update. At any rate, stay tuned for any updates, or as I likely know all three of you reading this, I’ll let you know if there’s a new site.

[silkygoldmilkweed]

“Brave, Gentle and Strong”: Does the bloody Hound, Sandor Clegane, fit Ned Stark’s standard for a good match for Sansa?

“When you’re old enough, I’ll make you a match with someone who’s worthy of you, someone brave and gentle and strong.” --Ned Stark, Game of Thrones

Does the bloody Hound, Sandor Clegane, fit Ned Stark’s standard for a good match for Sansa? An analysis of where we stand after the conclusion of S7:

STRONG, Physically (.5, out of .5 points possible)

OK, this one is easy. It’s illustrated twice on the show that the Hound is about as strong as four normal men. When he and Arya come across the hog farmer on the way to the Twins, he says “I need about eight hands” (meaning four men) to lift the wagon. The Hound just does it by himself, no trouble. And in the episode “The Broken Man,” even with a bum leg, the Hound can single-handedly carry a beam that takes four normal men to heft.

And that’s just manual labor. We also have seen the Hound cleave at least two men literally in half (at the Battle of the Blackwater), and in the episode “No One” he uses an ax to smash a skull (the ugly one who says “fuck you...cunt”). When he saves Sansa during the Bread Riot, he lifts a man up by his neck.

So...he’s definitely physically strong.

STRONG, Mentally and Emotionally (.4, out of .5 points possible)

This one is much harder to quantify accurately. He’s a rage case. He has a drinking problem for the first two seasons we know him. He’s low-key starving and sick the next two seasons with Arya. He works for a family of psychos and sociopaths and Jaime and Tyrion. He is acutely aware of the difference between suffering and death. Death doesn’t faze him. Suffering concerns him greatly and it’s a tool he uses to punish his enemies. 

In the end though, when he says “I’m a big fucker and I’m hard to kill” I think there’s an aspect of his hard-to-kill-ness that is sheer grit. He’s a survivor. He’s a beast. He’s strong, whereas the farmer (Sally’s dad) is not: “He’s weak. He can’t defend himself. They’ll both be dead come winter.” And Sandor Clegane has strength to spare: he shares it with the people he serves. 

At first that’s his Lannisters (is he their pet or are they really his pets?), and then it’s Sansa, and later Arya, and later still Septon Ray and the Brotherhood Without Banners and then Jon Snow.

I think his fatalism and pessimism trips him up quite a bit, but all things considered, he’s not perfectly emotionally and mentally strong but he’s improved in this area greatly and he wasn’t doing too badly to start with.

Total points for STRONG: .9 out of 1 Room for improvement: Could stand to be more emotionally vulnerable. His “grouchy old bear” persona prevents him, for the most part, from establishing healthy relationships.

BRAVE

“That’s the only time a man can be brave.” --Ned Stark

“Brave? A dog doesn’t need courage to chase off rats.” --Sandor Clegane

This is another mixed bag. The Hound is terrified of fire. We’ve seen it again and again and again: season two at the Blackwater, season three against Beric’s flaming sword, season four when Arya wanted to burn away the infection, and season seven with the burning zombie polar bear. He hasn’t conquered this fear at all. The best case scenario is that he freezes rather than actually running. 

He’s also starts the story very much a prisoner of the feudal system and unable to independently challenge the awfulness of the world in which they all find themselves. He uses many clever workarounds to succeed in Joffrey/Tywin’s world, but he’s not ready to challenge them outright. He talks shit to Tyrion, but he that’s the extent of it. So he’s not completely courageous politically or socially. 

Dany is a revolutionary, as Cersei puts it. Sandor very much is not. Sansa isn’t either. They are both basically socially conservative personalities who have internalized the patriarchy of Westeros and don’t spend a lot of time directly interrogating their circumstances.

But...he is “first in battle.” If you have a war going on, the Hound will be happy to start or end any fight you care to throw at him. “Any man dies with a clean sword, I’ll rape his fucking corpse” is his battle cry at the Blackwater, when he is very much in the vanguard while Joffrey cowers in the rear. The minute he’s spotted by Polliver’s men he’s ready to challenge them rather than fleeing. He strides into the fray at the Bread Riot to find Sansa. He takes on Brienne and her Valyrian steel sword to protect Arya. He’s first to strike against the advancing wights during the ice-lake battle. And above all, he’s willing to risk torture and execution to spirit away the Stark girls from the Lannisters who are trying to kill them. He’s willing to try to face King Robb as a Lannister deserter who kidnapped one or more of Robb’s sisters--he never makes it that far because Robb is slaughtered at the Twins, but he was going to show up with one or more of the Northern princesses and face the consequences of his very strange actions.

But what’s weird is that because of his temperament, battle doesn’t seem to frighten him very much. He must know he could die, but he hardly seems to care and it’s likely not because he doesn’t care. He tells Septon Ray that “dying doesn’t cure it either” in reference to violence being a contagious disease. 

He wants to live. He wants to fight. It’s his art. Not being able to fight is his fear--fighting is how he serves the people he cares about. If he was heartbroken after Sansa’s rejection at the Blackwater it was because he wanted to pledge his sword to her, for all intents and purposes, and she said no. He wanted to be her killer and she denied that she even needed one, much less him. She cut the legs out from under him as easily as he had cut men down on the field of battle.

“I don’t need saving.” “No, not you. You’re a real killer, with your water dancing and your Needle.”

Total points for BRAVE: .5 out of 1 Room for improvement: Needs to overcome fear of fire, question princes he thinks are making bad decisions and reject societal strictures that bind him.

GENTLE, Verbally  (.2, out of .5 point possible)

Has he ever soft-pedaled anything? Not to Arya. Rarely to Sansa. He told her that Joff would be easier on her if she was compliant (“Save yourself some pain girl. Give him what he wants.”), which is the opposite of what every fan thinks she should have done, but OK. He lied for her to protect her after she protected Ser Dontos. He wasn’t too aggressive the first time they ever spoke, which was an odd scene (on the show) where his motivation for even approaching her is unclear--did he sense that she was afraid of Ser Ilyn? was he trying to hit on her?--and he vanishes quickly. 

And after Sandor saved Sansa from the Bread Riots, he said nothing kind to her directly, but he did observe that she was physically hurt and ordered that she be cared for and taken to shelter.

The rest of the time he was a dick.

BUT...for all his swears and yelling and empty threats, he’s brutally honest and overwhelming forthright, which is more than can be said for most other characters that the Stark girls encounter. Lying is a form of violence against truth and morality, and the Hound rarely participates in it, generally, but if he does it is almost always with an ulterior motive that benefits a Stark girl.

When it comes to the Stark girls, he is all bark and virtually no bite (more on the exceptions shortly), whereas anyone who threatens Arya Stark in his presence gets the full brunt of the Hound’s swagger and sarcasm. My favorite remains the death of Rorge. As soon as the Hound heard that Rorge said he would fuck Arya bloody with a stick, he established that Rorge would die. He even nonchalantly made it possible for Arya to be the one to kill him--”What’s your name?”--although he easily could have done it himself. 

GENTLE, Physically (.2, out of .5 point possible)

Can a brute like the Hound be considered gentle? He loves violence. He loves smashing shit. He’s not delicate, that’s for sure.

He appears gentle enough with animals--Stranger and the wight-wagon donkey--but what about women? He’s not an outright physical abuser like Joffrey or Ramsay, but...gentle?

There are two strikes against him. 

The first is the deleted scene with Sansa. He menaces her and grabs her arm hard enough that she says, “Please, ser, you’re hurting me!” and bursts into tears. Sansa doesn’t flee from him but she doesn’t independently flee from anyone who is trying to hurt her, really. But it’s a deleted scene. Without it, you can truthfully say, “He never laid a hand on her except to save her life, twice.” There is a low-level of implied possible future violence that is borne out by the Hound himself when he tells Arya he “should have fucked her bloody” but he did her no harm.

In fact, in both the deleted scene and the final SanSan scene is written, Sansa seems to have a moment of epiphany about him where she says, “You won’t hurt me.” She seems amazed by this realization both times, and yet totally certain in her declaration. So let’s give Sansa some credit and trust her instincts: She doesn’t think the big bad Hound wants to do her any harm, even though his reputation is one of limitless, ungovernable violence.

The second strike against the Hound in re violence is that he backhands Arya while they are in the Riverlands. She stabbed him first. It was arguably self-defense, but if you don’t think the Hound wearing armor needs to defend himself against Arya and her little Needle, there is another interpretation. He wasn’t beating a little girl, he was disciplining his daughter. Corporal punishment is de rigeur parenting in Westeros. Arya later says that Ser Roderik would have “cuffed” Bran for leaving an arrow lying around the archery practice field. Ser Roderik wasn’t Bran’s dad, but he felt entitled to smack around a little misbehaving kid and not only was that not abuse, in terms of Westerosi parenting ethics, it was encouraged as part of successful childrearing. Not “cuffing” the kid would have been dereliction of duty.

I would argue that if the Hound wanted to hurt Arya, she’d be hurt. He didn’t want to hurt her, he wanted to set her straight, get her head right. Yelling and laughing at her weren’t enough, so she got the upgrade to a gentle wallop. It worked too. This was responsible parenting, as far as the mores of Westeros family life go. This is not to say in any way shape or form that it’s ever right to hit little kids. He shouldn’t have hit her. But to claim that it’s prima facie evidence that the Hound is an abuser is to miss the forest for the trees.

So those are the strikes against him. Does he have anything in his favor? Well, he saved both girls from a fate worse than death multiple times. He carried them both to safety at personal risk to himself. There would have been no consequence for him if he abandoned them to violent deaths. He could have skipped out. He didn’t.

He gently dabbed the blood off Sansa’s cheek.

He gently lifted Arya down from their horse.

He gently pushed Arya out of the way when she was in danger and he was about to go kill people to protect her.

He knocked Arya unconscious at the Red Wedding so she won’t impulsively run inside to get herself killed and also to keep her from having to see any more of the slaughter. There’s a kindness in that.

He’s better than Joffrey and Ramsay--he’s not a sadist, he doesn’t love inflicting pain on innocent and helpless creatures--but he’s not entirely what you call gentle either. 

He’s situationally gentle. Some circumstances and certain people reveal that he has a capacity for gentleness. Who are those people that reveal the Hound’s little-explored capacity for gentleness? Sansa and Arya, of course. 

To quote from the Book of the Mother, “As water rounds the stones, smoothing what was jagged, so does a woman's love calm a man's brute nature.”

We see more of both sides--his gentility and his brutish--when he’s with Arya partly because they are so alike that he lets his guard down, and because they aren’t trapped by the courtesies of court, nor by the incredibly awkward complicated nature of the triangle of Joffrey-Sansa-Sandor, plus Cersei, etc.

The Hound’s capacity for serenity and gentleness has been there all along, but we haven’t seen enough of it to believe that it’s real and that it will remain a consistent aspect of his personality.

Total points for GENTLE: .4 out of 1 Room for improvement: “Gentle” is definitely the aspect of Ned’s formula for a good match that requires the most dramatic improvement in season 8. If the Hound is to prove himself fit for Sansa in the eyes of the general audience, it is his demonstration of “gentle” in regards to the Stark girls in the last days of the show that will tip the scales for or against him. We also need to see more of him talking like a normal person with some wisdom and kindness to him. There was a great deal of this side of him in his re-introduction episode “The Broken Man” but it’s vanished since then, seemingly killed off along with Septon Ray. Interesting to see if a reunion with the Starks will again reveal a Sandor Clegane who has more to say than “fuck off, cunt.”

FINAL SCORE: 1.8 of 3 points possible CONCLUSION: He’s no angel like Jon Snow or Podrick Payne, and yet, and yet, and yet...he has something to offer, and the self-evident capacity for self-improvement and change. We shall see what becomes of him and his lady wolf in the final season.

[thewindsofwolves]

GoT for the ask thing

Alright, let's do this, and thanks for the ask !1. My beautiful cinnamon roll too good for this worldfave: Samwell Tarly (he's so sweet and soft poor lad what are doing there)2. My trash-shit fave: Lannistwins3. My I love to hate them fave: Ramsay Bolton (I hate this psycho but dude Iwan Rheon made him kinda charismatic)4. My I hate to love them fave: idk, maybe due to some of his actions in s7, Jon (I still love my son, but duuuuude political!Jon better be real lmao)5. My I wouldn’t piss on them if they were on fire non-fave: Tyrion6. My I didn’t care about them either way at first but the fandom makes such a big deal about them now I can’t stand them non-fave: Euron ? (idk) I mean I either ended loving the characters I hated/didn't care at first, or hate the characters I loved at first, no in between lol7. My I could take them or leave them kinda non-fave: (my non english native ass doesn't really understand what that category exactly is lmao)8. My I will go down with this ship and I won’t put my hands up and surrender, there will be no white flag above my door. I’m in love and always will be fave ship: Jonsa ? Jonsa. JONSAAAAAA9. My dirtybadwrong fave ship: None, I don't have any GOT/ASOIAF ship I think is bad or wrong or am ashamed of lol10. My they’re cute together and I dig them but I’m not all that terribly invested kinda fave ship: Gendrya or Braime, maybe.12 & 13. My I didn’t care about this ship either way at first but the fandom makes such a big deal about it now I can’t stand it non-fave ship & my MAKE IT STOP non-fave ship: J0N€RIS

[swiftsnowmane]

You have such great taste, so I'm coming to you for advice. What are your recommendations for art house Halloween movies?

Oh, what an excellent ask! I absolutely love artistic horror films, but I’m by no means an expert on them. Since I wasn’t sure if I had enough to recommend, I decided to just make a compilation that best exemplifies my personaltastes. Many do not have anything to do with Halloween, and some are not eventechnically ‘horror’ films at all, but are simply films and/or series that Ienjoy watching at this time of year.  :)

Below you will find a widevariety of recommendations, including silent film, film noir, gothic horror,sci-fi and dark fantasy, vampire films, zombie movies, tv series, comedies, parodies, mockumentaries,and my greatest love….folk horror.

Silent film:

- The Cabinet of Dr.Caligari (1920), dir. Robert Wiene – Iconic and a highly-influential silentGerman expressionist film about a creepy ‘doctor’ who hypnotizes a sleep-walker(a ‘sonambulist’) to do his bidding.

- The Phantom Carriage (1921), dir. Victor Sjöström–  On New Year’s Eve, the driver of a ghostly carriage forces a drunken man to look back at his wasted life.

- Häxan (1922),dir. Benjamin Christensen – Fictionalized Swedish-Danish documentary aboutwitches and witchcraft through the ages. Often categorized as folk horror, thisfilm contains evocative visuals and some memorable dramatizations, including a (literally) hysterical ‘nuns gone wild’ sequence. Despite its sensationalism, it is actually quite a sympathetic take on thetragedy of witch hunts, from the medieval era to the contemporary (1920s)treatment of women with mental illnesses.

- The Lodger(1927), dir. Alfred Hitchcock – Considered by critics to be the first true‘Hitchcock’ movie, this silent film is suspenseful, visually entrancing, and surprisingly moving. One of my personal favourites.

Other old movie classics:

- Double Indemnity (1944),dir. Billy Wilder – An insurance man falls for a married woman, and togetherthey begin to plan the murder of her husband. A noir classic, the first tocontain all the elements that would come to define the genre. A favourite ofmine.

- Laura (1944),dir. Otto Preminger – Another filmnoir fave, this time a murder mystery starring the mesmerizing Gene Tierney. Oneof the (many) inspirations for Laura Palmer in Twin Peaks. ‘Not just anotherdead girl,’ indeed.

- The Innocents (1961), dir. - [summary forthcoming]

- The Seventh Seal(1957), dir. Ingmar Bergman – This Swedish existentialist meditation on deathand mortality needs no introduction from me. Not a horror movie per se, but dueto its themes and visuals, it is very haunting all the same.

- Hour of the Wolf(1968), dir. Ingmar Bergman – Another Bergman classic, this time a surrealistpsychological horror-drama. A man lives with his pregnant wife on a remoteisland, and suffers from insomnia. He begins to be plagued by visions of‘demons’ and haunted by images from his past.

- Hitchcock films– Some of my personal faves include TheLady Vanishes (1938), Notorious (1946– noir classic), Spellbound (1945 -worth watching for the stunning surrealist dream sequence designed by SalvadorDali), Rear Window (perhaps not asvisually interesting as my usual picks, but a nostalgic fave that I used towatch with my dad), Psycho (1960 -cliché to list this  one, I know, but Ido  legitimately enjoy this film), Vertigo (1958 - another I used to watchwith my dad), and two of my absolute faves, Rebecca (1940 – see below) and the aforementioned The Lodger (1927).

-Hammer horror (aka British horror of the ‘50s-70s) - you can’t go wrong with the Hammer Dracula series, and/or anything starring Sir Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing. -  [summaries forthcoming]

Halloween films:

- Sleepy Hollow(1999), dir. Tim Burton – Fave Tim Burton film. Fave Johnny Depp film. FaveHalloween film. Just fave.

- Trick ‘r Treat(2007), dir. Michael Dougherty  –  Of all the quintessential, straight up‘Halloween’ movies, this anthology horror film is another top pick. It’s justsuch good fun.

- The Crow(1994), dir. Alex Proyas - A list of my personal faves could not be completewithout this fantastical, noir-ish tale of lost love and revenge. A nostalgicclassic.

Other ‘scary movies’:

- Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon (2006 mockumentary), dir. Scott Glosserman  - I’m not all that into *actual* slasher flicks (other than the original Halloween, which still to this day scares the shit out of me), but I’ve always greatly enjoyed this satirical take on the subject. :D

- Return of the Living Dead (1985), dir. Dan O’Bannon – While zombie films aren’t necessarily my fave horror sub-genre either, I can’t help but adore this one. Early Greg Nicotero visual effects on full display. Not to mention the iconic naked dancing in the graveyard scene.

- The Crazies (2010), dir. Breck Eisner – Probably my fave ‘zombie’ film. I use that term loosely as it’s not really about zombies, but it has a similar vibe. This movie immediately pre-dated The W@lking Dead, and now that I can no longer stand to watch that awful show, it has sort of become my preferred ‘version’ of this type of scenario.

Vampire films:

- Vampire Hunter D:Bloodlust (2000), dir. Yoshiaki Kawajiri – With its incredibly rich anddetailed visual design, based on the art of Yoshitaka Amano, and an evocativepost-apocalyptic western/ gothic setting, this classic anime film is along-time fave. When I was younger I wanted to live (and die) inside the aestheticof this film, and to this day it remains my favourite vampire movie. Alsocontains one of my all-time favourite vampire/human romances, the Hades andPersephone-esque Charlotte and Meier.

- Let the Right OneIn (2008), dir. Thomas Alfredson  - Swedishvampire movie. Not the sort of thing you’re probably expecting, either.

- 30 Days of Night(2007), dir. David Slade – One of the few vampire films in which the vampires actually terrified me.

- From Dusk till Dawn(1996), dir. Quentin Tarantino – Over the top action-horror ridiculousness. Myfavourite thing about this film is that it includes a scene of a young girlgetting her white t-shirt splattered with blood. Bethyl fans will understandwhat I mean. ;D

- What We Do In theShadows (2014), dir. Jemaine Clement and Taika Waititi – Mockumentary aboutvampires in New Zealand. Probably my fave thing I’ve seen in years. HIGHLYrecommended. :D

Dark fantasy/sci-fi:

- The Company ofWolves (1984), dir. Neil Jordan – A young girl in present day has a feverishdream in which she and her family live in a fairytale forest. After her oldersister is killed by a wolf, she repeatedly dares the dangers of ‘the wood’ tovisit her grandmother. Based on Angela Carter’s tale from The Bloody Chamber, with a screenplay co-written by Carter herself,this film is a must-see for anyone who enjoys a blend of eroticism and horrorin their Little Red Riding Hood tales. Despite the low-budget and cheesy qualityof some of the effects, I totally love this movie. :D

- Brotherhood of theWolf (2001), dir. Christophe Gans – Perhaps not the greatest film evermade, but I have an eternal soft spot for the legend of the Beast of Gévaudan.Not to mention my girl-crush on Monica Bellucci, lol.

- Angel’s Egg (1985) - [summary forthcoming]

- Pitch Black (2000),dir. David Twohy – The other films in this franchise might be more famous, butthe first entry is, imo, a sci-fi horror classic. My favourite part is thedynamic between the ‘boy’ Jack and the notorious criminal, Riddick.

- Pan’s Labyrinth (2006),dir. Guillermo del Toro - In 1940s Spain, a young girl finds escape from thebrutal fascist regime by visiting a labyrinthine underworld full of strange andmagical creatures.

- The Prestige(2006), dir. Christopher Nolan – In late 19th c. London, rival stagemagicians obsessively compete to find the best stage illusion, with strange,and often tragic, results. Not a horror film, but an intense and suspenseful thrillerall the same.

- Solomon Kane(2009), dir. Michael J. Bassett – Based loosely on the classic pulp-fiction stories ofRobert E. Howard (aka, creator of Conan the Barbarian), this film is a mix ofdark fantasy and horror elements. JamesPurefoy and Rachel Hurd-Wood in a SanSan-esque type dynamic. Super cheesy, yes,but such a guilty pleasure, OMG.

Gothic romance/horror (aka, ‘young woman goes to live at manor house and creepy things ensue’ ):

- Jane Eyre (2006BBC miniseries), dir. Susanna White – There are countless adaptations of thisclassic, and all have their merits. While the 2011 Hollywood movie has a higherbudget and some very lovely visuals, for me, nothing tops the version with TobyStephens as Rochester!!

- Northanger Abbey(2007), dir. Jon Jones – My personal fave adaptation of Jane Austen’s gothic horror satire, starring an adorable young Felicity Jones as thewide-eyed, imaginative heroine.

- Rebecca (1940),dir.  Alfred Hitchcock – A self-consciousyoung bride is tormented by the memory of her husband’s late wife. LawrenceOlivier and Joan Fontaine in a visually haunting Hitchcock classic.

- Dragonwyck (1946), dir. Joseph L.Mankiewicz – In the 1840s, a young women from a Connecticut farming community isinvited to the estate of a wealthy patroon.Worth watching for the ever gorgeous Gene Tierney and an extremely attractiveyoung Vincent Price. Such good chemistry!

- The Crimson Petaland the White (2011 BBC miniseries) – Based on the novel by Michael Faber,this is the story of Sugar, a prostitute in 1870s London, and what happens whenshe becomes the mistress of a wealthy soapmaker. At once sensual and deeplyunsettling. Plays heavily on the Victorian theme of ‘the angel in thehouse’.  Highly recommended.

- Crimson Peak(2015), dir. Guillermo del Toro – A culmination of all of the tropes andplotlines from the classics mentioned above (with the most direct nods to Dragonwyck).Guillermo del Toro takes the horror elements that are generally only present asundercurrent in these gothic romance stories and brings them, in all theirgrotesque and terrifying glory, to the surface.

Folk horror:

- The VVitch (2015), dir. Robert Eggers – In 1600’s New England, a puritan family must move from the safety of a settlement to the edge of the wilderness. One of my top favourite folk horror films, ever.  

- A Field in England (2013), dir. Ben Wheatley – Deserters of an English Civil War battle travel through an eerily empty English countryside landscape on a psychedelia-tinged trip. This film is not for everyone, but is visually stunning and ticks many of my personal boxes. HIGHLY recommended for anyone who enjoys alchemical themes and imagery.  A folk horror masterpiece.

- The Wicker Man (1973), dir. Robin Hardy – This iconic film needs no introduction. Features one of my all-time favourite Sir Christopher Lee performances, as the incomparable Lord Summerisle. A must-see for anyone remotely interested in the folk horror genre.

- Witchfinder General(1968), dir. Michael Reeves  –Another 17th century period classic, starring Vincent Price as the villainousMatthew Hopkins, aka the Witchfinder General. While perhaps not as well-belovedfor me as the three listed above, I very much appreciate this film’s settingand overall aesthetic, as well as its absolutely beautiful soundtrack.

- The Devil Rides Out (1968) - [summary forthcoming]

- The Blood on Satan’s Claw (1971)  - [summary forthcoming] 

- Black Death(2010), dir. Christopher Smith - Sean Bean, Eddie Redmayne, and Carice VanHouten in a supernatural-tinged medieval thriller. Essentially, ‘The Wicker Man’-meets-‘Heartof Darkness’, set to the backdrop of the black plague.

- Apostle (2018) - [summary forthcoming]

Misc/other:

- The Devil’s Whore(2008 miniseries), dir. Marc Munden – Despite the title, this is not actually ahorror movie, but is an exquisitely beautiful romantic period drama, set duringthe English Civil Wars. One of my all-time favourite historical miniseries,ever.

- Flesh + Blood(1985), dir. Paul Verhoeven – Set in Italy in 1501, Rutger Hauer is a leader ofa ruthless band of mercenaries and Jennifer Jason Leigh is the young maiden whobecomes their captive. Not a ‘horror’ film in technical sense, but Verhoeven’stypical bloody visuals and dark themes and tone secure it a place on this list.TRIGGER WARNING: Contains an intenserape scene.  

- Imprint (2007),dir. Michael Linn – Native Americanfolklore-based suspense/thriller. One of the many reasons I love this film isthat it was actually filmed onlocation in South Dakota (you have no idea how many times filmmakers try to pass off California landscapes as ‘SouthDakota’, it’s soo annoying).

- Southern Comfort(1981), dir. Walter Hill - In 1973, a Louisiana Army National Guard squad ontheir weekend maneuvers in rural bayou country antagonize the local Cajunpeople and end up ruthlessly hunted. A southern gothic thriller, with someWicker Man-esque elements.

- Winter’s Bone(2010), dir. Debra Granik – A teenage girl in the rural Ozarks must track downher missing father in order to protect her family. Not a horror film, but aquietly intense thriller.  A personalfave of mine.

- The Revenant (2015), dir. Alejandro González Iñarrítu– [summary forthcoming]

- Wind River (2017), dir. Taylor Sheridan – [summary forthcoming]

- Dunkirk (2017), dir. Christopher Nolan –[summary forthcoming]

- Trollhunter (2010), dir. André Øvredal  – Taking the form of a ‘found footage’ mockumentary, this movie follows filmmakers who set out to capture images of elusive Norwegian trolls

- Ed Wood (1994),dir. Tim Burton – Not a horror film, but rather a biographical comedy-dramabased on the life of the titular B-movie producer. An underrated TimBurton/Johnny Depp classic.

- Clue (1985), dir. Jonathan Lynn - A classic comedy, and one of my all ‘round fave murder mystery movies. No matter how many times I’ve seen it, this infinitely quotable film still makes me laugh, every time.

- The Whisperer InDarkness (2011), dir. Sean Branney  –Independent film, based on H. P. Lovecraft story of the same name. Made with ablend of vintage and modern techniques, intended to evoke the style of filmsfrom the 1930s.

- From Hell (2001),dir. the Hughes brothers – Murder mystery/thriller based on the Alan Mooregraphic novel. Gruesome and memorable interpretation of the unsolved tale ofJack the Ripper.

TV series:

- Ripper Street (2012tv series) – A period-drama procedural set in the aftermath of the Jack theRipper killings in late-Victorian Whitechapel, London. Centers around ChiefDetective-Inspector Reid, who is haunted by his inability to catch the serialkiller, as well as by dark events from his own past. (I only recommend thefirst two seasons, however, as after that the quality of the storylines greatlydecreased, imo).

- The League of Gentlemen(1999 tv series) – Legendary dark comedy/folk horror series created by MarkGatiss, Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton, and Jeremy Dyson. If you enjoy the bizarre and grotesqueside of British humour, look no further. (See also the Christmas Special (set between series 2&3), The League of Gentlemen’s Apocalyse (2005), and the most recent, and incredibly well-done, Anniversary Special (2017)). 

- Psychoville (2009BBC series) - British psychologicalhorror/black comedy sitcom, created by above-mentioned The League of Gentlemen’s Reece Shearsmith and Steve Pemberton. Memorablecharacters include David and Maureen (a hilariously creepy mother and son duo),Mr. Jelly, a grumpy clown who never removes his face paint, and Jeremy thelibrarian, who is tormented by a mysterious nemesis, the Lynchian ‘Silent Singer’.

- Inside No. 9 (2014tv series) – Another excellent show by the evil geniuses that are ReeceShearsmith and Steve Pemberton, this is a series of stand-alone episodes that Ican only describe as ‘short stories on film’, each in sightly different genre. Someare comedic, some are psychological, some homages to famous things, some sad,some bizarre, some are downright terrifying (there is an episode entitled‘The Devil of Christmas’ that was probably the most disturbing thing I’ve seen in a longtime).

- Twin Peaks(1991 tv series), by Mark Frost and David Lynch – Don’t think I even need toexplain why this seminal and endlessly influential show makes the list!

- Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries (2012 tv series) – Not remotely scary, or even remotely ‘horror’, this is rather a delightful little romantic period drama about a lady detective in 1920s Melbourne, Australia. Cheesy as hell at times, but worth it for the absolutely delicious chemistry between the two leads.

- Stranger Things (2016 tv series) – The first season is iconic in its own right, and the second season did NOT disappoint. This show is just the right combo of creepiness and comforting nostalgia. Not to mention the wonderfully-written and endlessly endearing cast of characters. I love it so much.  

Currentlywatching:

- Bates Motel (2013tv series) – Started watching this over the summer, and it is extremelywell-made and most definitely creepy and unsettling in every possible way.  I was very impressed so far, but I had totemporarily stop watching because this past summer was a difficult timeemotionally, and I didn’t want to compound things by watching something sopotentially disturbing. I plan to resume it asap, though!

- Project Blue Book (2019 tv series) - [more detailed summary forthcoming] Creepy/mysterious period drama about UFO coverups in the 1950s.

On my ‘still towatch’ list (**updated 08/04/2019):

Kwaidan (1965)

The Love Witch (2016)

Only Lovers Left Alive (2013)

The City of the Dead (1960)

The Masque of the Red Death (1964)

Picnic at Hanging Rock 

Penda’s Fen

Robin Redbreast

Tam-Lin (1970)

The Borderlands (2013)

Kill List (2011)  - tried watching this one, but struggled to get through it, tbh

Mullholland Drive (2001)

Penny Dreadful (2014 tv series)

I realize that the majority of these are not ‘art house’ films by any definition, but I hope this list is nonetheless of some interest. If I’ve left out anything essential, it’s probably because it’s either slipped my mind, or I simply haven’t seen it yet. 

Thanks again for the ask – it’s reminded me of some excellent films I hadn’t thought about in a while. :)