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#sorry I'm having bad thoughts at night again
luveline · 2 days
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hi jade! i was wondering if you could do a zombie!au fic where r helps steve when he wakes up from a nightmare?
For a split second, Steve doesn’t know that you’re you, and he shoves you away hard. He scrambles away from you in the dark, kicking at your leg, your light sleep torn open as he shouts an unintelligible word and tumbles against the zipped tent door. 
“Steve, it’s me,” you say, voice scared and croaky with sleep. “It’s just me, it’s just me. Just us.” 
His breath is ragged. Your leg aches from the brunt of his entire body weight, your arm stings similarly. You can barely see him in the dark, his mouth a black hole, his eyes a strange shade of their usual brown as he sucks in harsh breath. You sit up with a groan. 
“Just me,” you say again, softer, “nobody else.” 
“Did I hurt you?” he asks. 
“It’s okay.” 
He swallows a lump. “Did I?”
“No. It’s alright. Come back over here, you didn't hurt me.” 
He looks at you like you’re an alien, but he shuffles back across the tent to sit by you again on the packed out mattress and your few sheets. When he’s close enough, you take the zipper on his hoodie and pull it down, away from his neck and open, before pushing the garment from his shoulders to bring out his arms. The rightmost has a bad scar from a worse infection running down the forearm, but besides that, he has a smooth expanse of skin for touching. You want to touch him. 
“I kicked you,” he says, “I’m sorry.” 
You hold him by the elbow, turned to him with your chin up. You want to get a good look at him. His bottom lip trembles. “Bad dream?” you ask gently. 
He presses his lips into a tight line. 
“I know they scare you, but it’s really okay, Steve, you’re okay.” Your voice has turned to butter, a silky whisper as you bring your hand to his cheek, and he crushes it between his face and his shoulder. “It’s okay.” 
“It’s okay,” he says finally, eyes squeezing shut. 
Fuck, baby, you think, pushing up onto your knees. “Gonna hug you,” you say, wrapping your arms around his head. 
He smells like that strange, subtle sweat that clings to his hair while he sleeps. No discernible odour, but the scent of perspiration. Maybe it’s just how he smells, or his pillow, his t-shirt? You bury your nose into his hair and attempt to rub the tension from between his shoulders.
“You smell nice,” you whisper, pressing a bunch of quick, loving kisses into his limp hair.  
“Did I hurt you a lot, when I–” He clears his throat. “I pushed you twice. I’m sorry.” 
“Baby, don’t be sorry, I don’t care.” 
“I didn’t mean to, I just thought it was you. They were– it was ripping my face off.” 
“That’s not gonna happen. Nothing’s gonna hurt you.” You close your eyes, let your face rest almost entirely in his hair. “I'm not gonna let that happen to you, I promise.” 
His breathing slows. His hands curl loosely in the front of your shirt. 
“Do you wanna lay back down? It’s still night, I think. It’s so cold.” 
Steve pulls away from you to look over your face. Without comment, he grabs his hoodie from around his waist to drape over your shoulders, sliding across toward his pillow, a hesitancy in his movements. “I think I’ll stay awake. Just for a bit. I don’t want to have the same dream.” 
“I’ll stay awake with you.” 
“No, you should sleep. It’ll make me feel better if I can…” 
He wants to watch you sleep. You wrap his hoodie around you tightly and slip back down onto your back on the portable mattress, your face to his thigh. You clasp his ankle in your hand. 
“You don’t wanna talk about it?” you ask. 
Steve encourages your face onto his thigh properly. Your neck aches, but you’ve no inclination to tell him as his hand cups your neck. “No. It was stupid. I woke you up. Scared you.” 
“No way. You don’t scare me.” 
He exhales. His thumb strokes your chin. “At least I get to wake up to you. From a nightmare to a straight up dream.” 
You hold his eyes. “Oooh, smooth.” 
He bends down to touch your nose to his. “I really don’t hurt you?” he asks again, whispering. 
“No, I promise.” 
You draw lazy half circles into his ankle and pretend to feel more tired than you do. Steve stays there for a while, bent over you without a sound. His hands are shaking. When sleep begins to weigh you down again, he noses a kiss behind your ear and sits up. You wonder what he’s thinking, listening to his breath. He doesn’t wake you again that night.
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wosoluver · 17 hours
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Bad guy
misa rodriguez x reader
Billie Eilish x woso prompt list
Misa Rodriguez Masterlist
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Sitting on the couch, watching a thriller movie she knew to well, and constantly rewatched just 'for the plot'.
Misa's concentration had been whisked away, when she heard a knock on the door.
It was late, and she didn't plan on getting it at all, until she heard your voice.
"Misa?"
That caught her attention immediately.
Opening the door she had found you standing there, with a bag hanging from your shoulder. Eyes bloodshot.
"Y/n, what are you doing here?"
If you didn't look the way you did right now- with eyes puffy, tear stained face and entirely disheveled - maybe, just maybe she would have considered not letting you inside the apartment.
Besides being teammates, you were friends, in a complicated way. But this whatever it was- had been torn apart by your recent relationship.
It had been strained, especially these last couple weeks, after you two had a nasty argument, over the fact that she didn't like your boyfriend.
For the last six months she had tolerated the guy. She didn't like him from the beginning.
In part because she resented the fact that she wasn't the one taking you home at the end of the night.
But also, he seemed really shady.
First he started showing up everywhere you were, uninvitedly. Which she brushed off, noticing the way your eyes twinkled when you looked at him.
But then he slowly pulled you away from your friends.
You no longer hanged hang out, outside of training.
Despise wasn't a strong enough word to describe how Misa felt towards him.
"Can I?" you said snapping her out of her thoughts. She nodded rapidly, taking a step to the side, letting you pass.
Misa watched you with hawk eyes, placing your bag down, looking at the tv, trying to lighten up the situation, with a comment.
"This movie again?"
"I like the plot."
"You mean the leading actress?" you said with a small dry laugh.
"We are not changing subjects." she knew you. "What happened?"
"Uhm we just had a fight, don't worry. Normal couple stuff. Can I stay on your couch for the night?"
"Normal couple stuff? We barely talk this days, and you randomly show up at my apartment in the middle of the night? And asks me to not worry about it?" taking a deep breath. "No can't do."
"I'm sorry. This was a bad idea. I'm going to Sofie's."
"No!" she said getting in your way before you could leave. "Just, please tell me what's going on." her face softening. No matter what had happened she would always care.
"You were right."
"About?"
"Him!" you said sitting down at the edge of the couch. "He's a fucking self centered piece of garbage! Can you believe we was trying to manipulate me into leaving football? He wants a stay at home wife that doesn't travel around all the time."
"How long has this been going on?"
"Maybe a month or two,"
"Two?" her tone intensified.
"Since our argument. I started to reflect on what you said. When he brought up the idea of letting go of my job, I went over the edge."
She moved to sit next to you, placing a hand on your knee reassuringly.
"When he found out how close we were, he tried to make you the bad guy.
And I was so desperate..." she hadn't seen you like this in a long time. "But as he became more rigid and demanding, I realized maybe this wasn't good for me at all.
I tried breaking up with him."
now looking into her eyes, your vision blurry again.
"Tried?"
"He got out of control, I was quick to grab some of my stuff and get out."
"If he laid as much as a finger on you-"
"He didn't!"
"He could have! And I wouldn't be there to protect you!" she got up, angry at herself unfairly. Wiping her palms on her sweats.
"Misa, you can't protect me from everything."
"I can try." eyes glossy.
You immediately got up to hug her, taking in her scent you didn't know you had missed it so terribly.
Reaching to give the taller girl a kiss on the cheek, that was a more like the corner of her lips. It was normal between the two of you.
"If I had listened to you, none of this would have happened. I put myself in this situation."
"I shouldn't have let you pull away so easily." she said moving a strain of your messy hair out of your face. "Are you really going to sleep on the couch?"
"If you want me to."
"Ay, no seas tonta." letting out a slight laugh. "By the way, all your stuff is still on the top two drawers." she said following you to her bedroom.
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You woke up with her soft breathing on the back of your neck. How you had missed this. You were now used to waking up to an empty spot next to you, this reminded how much you loved cuddling.
Glad that there was no training today, you turned facing her and went back into deep slumber.
The loud noise of your phone ringing nonstop in the living room had shaken both of you awake. You decided to go check it or at least turn it off.
Seeing his contact on the screen made you scoff.
"He's unbelievable." throwing your phone on the bed. When the phone had started to buzz once again, the goalkeeper was quick to pick it up.
"Diga."
"I want to talk to my girlfriend. Why do you have her phone?"
"Where else did you think she would go after running away from you?"
"Misa!" you whispered yelled standing close to the door.
"I can hear her voice, can you just pass the damn phone?"
"The only person you will talk to from now on, is me."
"This doesn't concern you."
"I beg to differ." and that was her final words before cutting the conversation off.
"Thank you. But you don't need to burden yourself with this."
"Come here." she said from where she was sitting on the bed.
You walked to stand in front of her as she placed her hands on your hips, looking up to you with her beautiful chocolate eyes.
"You know why I sleep on the side closest to the door, when you're sleeping over?"
You nodded, reciting the words she'd always say "If anyone breaks in, they have to go through you first."
"Exactly. You told him you don't want anything to do with him. And now he's going to have to go through me, if he wants to get to you ¿Vale?"
You nodded taking her into your arms as she hugged your torso. She managed to pull you back to bed, joining the warm covers.
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"Mierda!" you hissed, looking through your bag.
"¿Qué pasa?" she asked from the doorway holding a cup of cafe con leche for you.
"I forgot my computer's charger."
"Use mine for now, do you want to go get the rest of your stuff?"
"No, but also it might be the best if I do."
"After breakfast then?" and you only nodded in agreement.
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"Okay." she said parking the car, ready to open the door. "Stay here."
"Is that a question or?" you teased her.
"Sorry, I just-"
"Relax, I really don't want to face him." you were thankful for her protective nature, although Misa felt like it could be a bit much at times, you had never felt that way. "But please don't physically hurt him."
"Trust me." she said with a kind smile, getting out of the car.
She would honor her words, but to say she didn't want to punch some sense into him would be a lie. Although that probably would do nothing. If having you by his side didn't make him want to be a better man, she was sure nothing in the world would.
She knocked twice on the door.
"I knew you would come aroun-" he said opening the door, shutting up and gulping at the sight of the intimidating woman on the other side.
"I'm here to get her things." she stood tall, like she did often, arms crossed and face scowling.
He had the audacity to take a step into the hallway, looking both ways, desperate to see if you were there too.
"She sent me."
"Right." he said turning to get a box that was sitting by the door. "Couldn't wait to take my place, huh?"
She had never rolled her eyes so far back, bitting the inside of her cheek then letting a laugh out.
"Still trying to make me the bad guy, huh?" Misa said dryly taking the box from his hands, not waiting for another word and returning to the car.
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I need your guy's help, what should go on next? I don't feel like it's done at all, but I wanted to put it out anyway, maybe someone comes up with something.
I'm also taking in requests! Will add new players to my request list.
As always like & share!
buy me a coffee!
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gilverrwrites · 2 days
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Have we discussed Roman’s separated wife hooking up with Bruce Wayne? You and Bruce have always been cordial, so when Roman doxxes you, Bruce lets you stay at the Manor and cry on his shoulder until the wine bottle is empty. He’s so nice and his hand is so warm on your cheek and oh Lord, it’s bigger than your face and you can’t remember the last time you felt safe while a man was touching you. You try to make a move, but Bruce knows he’s overindulged you (partially to get info about Roman but he’ll feel guilty about it later), so he stops you…but promises he’ll be more than ready and willing when you’re in your right mind and decide you still want this. You wait anxiously the entirety of the next day, until Bruce shows up at your door in the sluttiest t-shirt and sweatpants you’ve ever seen, his ginormous hand finding its place on your face again while the other one is slipping under the hem of your shirt.
Slutty top? You've hit a nerve anon, cause now all I'm thinking about is Brucie in a slutty little crop top, like sir put that washboard away before I bite it! Honestly, feral for anyone of any shape and size in a crop top, just show me your belly, please. Yeah, that would work on me.
But to answer your question, no we have not discussed this but we certainly can!!!!
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Like, I can say earnestly, when he invited you to stay with him, sleeping with you did not cross his mind; he was purely thinking about;
Helping you get out of a bad situation
Good for the Brucie Wayne image (so long as the press don't get wind of it until you've found somewhere permanent to move too)
(as mentioned) Chance to get info on Black Mask
But the moment you flash that perfectly poised smile, even though you’re clearly on the brink of tears, he's thinking ‘Uh oh. I'm in trouble.’
He never thought much of you while you were with Roman, if maybe a little bit sorry for you. The extent of your relationship was occasional networking with Bruce at events, and Batman peeking through your windows at night to check on you when Roman was at his worst or imprisoned.
It helps that he thought you were pretty.
But now, as he's getting to know you on a personal level, seeing that you're stronger than he'd thought, and smarter. You're letting down walls and actually relaxing, and in his domain at that! It stirs something within him.
And for you, like Roman and Bruce are the same age, from similar backgrounds, similar personas for the public (charming and rich) but it's crazy to see how different they really are.
When you talk, Bruce isn't just waiting for his turn to speak, he listens.
There's no coercion when you set a boundary, he just respects it. Which funnily enough makes you more willing to share. He's just so easy to trust.
When you ask about interesting pieces around his house, he doesn't brag about where it's from and what it costs. Instead, he tells you stories about his parents or his kids interacting with it.
He's funny, and respectful, not at all what you'd expected.
And did you mention handsome? Oh, he's very handsome. That dark hair and those blue eyes. The chiselled jaw and the dimples and he smells good too, you find that out after you bury your nose into his chest while he's carrying you to bed that first night. You're tipsy, and his house is a maze, he's just trying to help and not at all showing off his strength.
The same way he's just dressed so casually the following day when he comes to find you, this is what he always lounges around. He's totally not subtly flexing his glamour muscles as you open the door.
Now, Roman is by no means bad in bed. He's just, shall we say, selfish? He has a set way in life and sex that he expects you to live up to.
Bruce though? He's a giver. He can take, when appropriate, but right now, he knows what you need.
You need those big hands on your waist as he chases you into the bed with his mouth. You need them soothing your tired body, massaging all the stress out of your aching body. You need his thumb to rub circles into your inner thighs while he kisses, and sucks, and laps at your hot, wet sex. You need his long hard fingers pumping into that sweet little hole, again and again until you cum all over them.
And that is just the start.
But you know one other really important thing you need? Some goddamn aftercare.
He knows it straight away, shouldn’t have been surprised. But when your body immediately falls limp after he rolls off of you, when you look at him confused as he asks if you need anything he knows your life has been lacking kindness for so long that you barely even recognise when it's extended to you.
He's not good at the emotional stuff, at comforting words but he reasons that you probably don't need to hear it right now. Don't need to be reminded of your mistakes, of your past.
Instead, he pulls you into him, wrapping his warmth around you like a giant weighted blanket. Holding you until you accept his affection and melt into his arms.
Meanwhile, the False Facers can't breach Bruces security, can't get a good look into the Manor. Which means they don't know what you're doing there. But they know you're there, and that means Roman knows you're there.
And Romans not stupid, you sneaky, no good, selfish whore.
He gave you everything, and this is how you repay him? You nasty little bitch. And with Bruce Wayne of all people?
Don't get comfy, because the moment you step outside those gates, the second you let your walls down, he's going to rock your shit. You're going to pay for all the crap you've put him through, tenfold.
Taglist: @wandalfnation
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mythicalninjas · 2 days
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Hi! Idk if you’re requests are still open but!
Could you do a Donnie getting mad/having a bad day and he kinda explodes (with no reason/gratuitamente) with reader (she)? And they stay away from the lair for a while, and happy ending! (Just want heart-crushing angst with happy ending hsuahs)
(Tbh the prompt I actually thought was “Donnie was stressed and tired of being different, reader who’s autistic says they relate, so he explodes saying they don’t, how could they?” But idk if you’re ok with writing that, so I simplified it! ~I’m autistic, that’s why I thought of that~)
If my ask is to complicated or didn’t inspire you that’s tots ok! I understand! (Sorry this ask was so big too!)
Have a good day/ night! ☺️
It's okay, your prompt is amazing ☺️ Sorry for keeping you waiting for too long... I had to deal with college in the past several months.
I hope I did write the way you asked. Enjoy 💜
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It was a quiet night in the lair, but that didn't reflect Donatello's internal state. The laboratory was plunged into darkness, save for the dim light of the monitors that cast dancing shadows on the walls. The frantic sound of the keyboard echoed, the only sound apart from the hum of the machines at work. Donnie was exhausted, physically and emotionally. His brain was burning with data overload, with formulas and calculations that didn't fit together as they should. It had been days of incessant research, of failed experiments, of trying to find solutions to problems that seemed to multiply.
Every mistake, every failure, was a nagging reminder that he needed to be better. He had to be better. There was no room for weakness. His brothers depended on him, the world depended on him. And the constant pressure to deliver results was starting to implode inside. Exhaustion weighed heavily on his shoulders, but he kept pushing, ignoring the body that was crying out for rest, ignoring the accumulated stress.
She entered the laboratory, as she had done so many times before. Her steps were soft, as if she were trying not to interrupt, but her presence always brought a sense of comfort that Donnie appreciated, even if he never admitted it out loud. He was so focused that he barely noticed her coming until he felt the soft touch of her fingers on his shoulder.
"Hey, Donnie..." Her voice was soft, a gentle touch to his swirling mind. "Are you all right?"
Donatello barely lifted his eyes from the monitors, trying to recalculate a complicated sequence. "I'm busy now," he muttered, his fingers still running across the keyboard.
She waited for a moment, watching the tiredness on his face. She knew that he threw himself into his work when he was frustrated or anxious, and she had learned to give him space when necessary. But now, there was something different in the air. He seemed more tense than usual, more closed off.
She let out a little sigh, hesitating before speaking again. "I know you're busy, but... maybe it's time to take a break? You've been at it for hours..."
Her touch should have been a comfort, but at that moment, something in Donnie snapped. The pressure, the frustration, the accumulated tiredness - it all blended together in an explosion of emotions that he could no longer control.
“I said I'm busy!” His voice echoed louder than he had intended. He stood up abruptly from his chair, his eyes blazing with anger, anger that wasn't hers, but which ended up being directed at her. “Don't you understand? I can't stop! If I stop, I'll fail. If I fail, everything falls apart! And you here, distracting me with… with your unimportant things!
She took a step back, shocked. The impact of his words had hit her like a punch in the gut. Never, in all the time she had known him, had he spoken to her like that. Always so calm, so controlled… but now, he seemed on the verge of collapse. Her eyes filled with tears before she could control herself, but she refused to let them fall. She didn't want to show how much it had hurt her.
“I'm sorry for… bothering you.” Her voice was low, broken, almost inaudible.
She turned quickly and left the lab before he could say anything else, before the tears flowed. Donnie stood there, his heart racing, the echo of his words still hanging in the air. For a few seconds, he remained motionless, trying to process what had just happened. Then the guilt began to set in, slow and corrosive.
He had hurt someone who had never been anything but kind to him. He had hurt her.
She walked aimlessly through the streets of New York, the cold of the night beginning to bother her, but nothing compared to the tightness in her chest. The emotional pain was much stronger than any physical discomfort. She couldn't stop thinking about his words, the tone of his voice. It was as if the Donnie she knew, the one who always cared, who listened and understood, had disappeared, replaced by someone she barely recognized.
She walked for hours, wandering around the city, trying to find some clarity amidst the confusion of feelings. Part of her wanted to understand why he had exploded like that. He was overwhelmed, that was obvious. But did that justify what he'd said? The sharp words still echoed in her mind, and she wondered if he really thought that.
While she was lost in thought, Donnie was back in the lab, but his focus had completely disappeared. The screens flashed in front of him, but he could barely see what was written. Guilt was consuming him from the inside out. He knew he had made a mistake, that he had said horrible things. The frustration he felt wasn't her fault, and yet he had taken it out on the person who least deserved it.
Finally, he got up from his chair and left the lair. He needed to find her, he needed to correct the mistake he had made. He didn't know exactly what he would say, but he knew he had to apologize, he had to make amends.
After some time, he found her. She was sitting on top of a building, her gaze lost in the horizon. The evening breeze swayed her hair, and Donnie felt his heart squeeze at seeing her so far away, so hurt. He hesitated for a moment before approaching. Each step seemed heavy, weighed down by guilt and regret.
“Hey,” he called, his voice softer than before, almost fearful.
She didn't turn around immediately, but he knew she had heard. Donnie sat down next to her, keeping a respectful distance. The silence between them was thick, full of unspoken words, but he knew he needed to speak, needed to break through that wall he himself had erected.
“I'm sorry,” he began, his voice low, sincere. “I… I shouldn't have spoken to you like that. You didn't deserve that. None of it was your fault.”
She remained silent for a few moments, and he almost thought she wouldn't answer. But then she sighed, her eyes still fixed on the city.
“Why did you do it, Donnie?” her voice was broken, and he realized how much his words had really hurt her. “I just… I just wanted to help you. And you pushed me away.”
Donnie closed his eyes for a moment, feeling the weight of his own failings. “I know. I know you were only trying to help. And I… I was an idiot. I was frustrated, tired, and lost control. But that's no excuse for what I did.”
She finally turned her face to look at him. Her eyes were watery, but the anger had given way to a deep sadness. “You didn't have to hurt me like that, Donnie. I'm always here for you, you know that. And yet… you blew up at me, as if I was part of the problem.”
Her words dug deep into Donnie's heart. He had been the cause of her pain, and now he could clearly see the impact his actions had had. It wasn't just the momentary explosion, but what came after - the insecurity, the doubt. He needed to fix that.
Donnie swallowed, feeling small in the face of what he had caused. “I never meant to hurt you,” he said, his voice full of regret. “You're… the last person in the world I wanted to be cruel to. I was just so overwhelmed, with all the pressure of being the brains, of having to sort everything out for my brothers… And I ended up taking it out on you.”
She sighed, looking at the horizon again. “I understand that you have this responsibility, Donnie. I know how much you carry. But I was also there, trying to share that weight with you. And you pushed me away, as if I wasn't important.”
Her words pierced his heart harder than any physical attack could. She was right. He had spent so long concentrating on his own burden that he didn't realize how much she was trying to help, how much she wanted to be there for him.
“I was wrong,” he said, with more conviction this time. “I was wrong about everything. I know I can be controlling and stubborn, but I need you. I… want you by my side. You're important to me. More than I can express.”
She remained silent, absorbing his words. He moved a little closer, reaching out hesitantly and placing his hand gently on hers.
“I promise,” he said, his voice soft but firm. “I promise I'll try to be better. I'll work on myself, on how I handle things, so that this doesn't happen again.”
She looked at him, her eyes finally meeting his, assessing the sincerity she saw there. And she realized that, although he had made a mistake, he was willing to do whatever it took to make it right. It was a long road, but she knew Donnie was committed to walking it.
“I want to believe that, Donnie,” she murmured, her voice still tinged with a slight pain. “I just… need some time.”
He nodded, understanding. “I understand. And I'll give you as much time as you need.”
They sat in silence for a few more minutes, side by side, watching the city lights. The noise of life below continued, indifferent to the emotions that filled the top of that building. But there, between them, time seemed to have slowed down, making room for reconciliation, for forgiveness.
She leaned forward, resting her head on his shoulder, a small concession. He felt relief run down his spine, as if that simple gesture was proof that things would eventually be all right. He knew he was lucky - lucky that she was still there, by his side, even after everything.
Donnie wrapped his arm around her, gently pulling her closer, as if he were trying to protect her not only from the outside world, but also from himself. His heart was pounding, but this time, not out of guilt or anger, but out of gratitude. He knew he had a second chance, and he would do his best not to waste it.
They stayed there for a while longer, the silence now less heavy, more comforting. The cold night wind blew lightly, but Donnie felt the warmth of having her close again. She was still hurting, and he knew it would take time for everything to heal completely. But he was willing to wait, willing to do whatever it took to win back her trust.
Finally, she stood up slowly, and Donnie followed her. She gave him a small smile, still shy, but which warmed his heart. “Let's go home,” she said, and those words were all he needed to hear.
Together, they descended from the building and headed back to the lair. The walk back was silent, but the tension between them had eased. She didn't hold his hand, but she didn't push him away either. For Donnie, that was a start.
And he knew that, in time, they would find a way to heal - together.
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sunnynwanda · 3 days
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Trouble of Mind: Part 2
Part 1
Warnings: failed brainwashing, mental exhaustion, tormented Villain (and Hero)
When the door creaks open in front of them, Hero is still deep in thought, frantically searching for whatever to say, which Villain seems to understand because they nod, gesturing for them to come inside. Without a word, they walk down the corridor, leading Hero to their bedroom.
It's dark inside, heavy curtains blocking any remnants of light outside - another thing physically painful to them in the current state. It takes a few moments for Hero's vision to adjust, but once it does, they notice a couch across from Villain's bed, already prepared for them. "How did you..?"
"Know you'd come?" Villain finishes for them, rubbing a hand over their eyebrows with a sympathetic sigh. "I know how it feels when it's your first time dealing with this."
"Is it bad again?" Hero asks carefully. There's another question lingering on the tip of their tongue; Villain can sense it. "It's because of me, isn't it? My interference?" Hero finally gathers the courage, their heart and mind racing as if in a competition as they wait for Villain's answer.
Villain nods shortly, turning away to search for the essential oils, to keep their hands busy and mind occupied. They don't blame Hero, not really. In fact, they are grateful that Hero hadn't read their mind in all their years of battling. That's more respect for their privacy than they received in the dungeons of the ministry.
"I'm sorry," Hero mutters, their voice dripping with guilt. They fail to come up with words after everything they have witnessed in Villain's twisted mind. All Hero knows is that they are relieved a large part of it has been suppressed by Villain's defense mechanisms.
Villain sighs, fully aware of their nemesis' regret over the situation. They allow their gaze to linger on Hero's troubled expression before speaking. "I don't blame you."
"You should," Hero states simply, leaning back against the back of the sofa. Their head drops against the headrest, eyes falling shut. No wonder Villain prefers to attack at night, they think. Who would have thought, light could be a vicious type of torture?
For several moments, they remain silent, heavy breathing being the only noise in the room. Villain moves to sit on their bed, contemplating whether they want to know the answer to the question that has formed in their ragged mind.
"How deep did you get?" They finally whisper, not wanting to startle Hero. They wonder if their phrasing made sense and are about to clarify when Hero's faint voice cuts the air.
"Unconscious."
Villain almost smiles, leaning back against the mattress and allowing their eyes to fall shut. "I know. How deep?"
"All of it," Hero lifts their head, glancing in the general direction of the bed. They can barely make out Villain's shape on it.
"Tell me," Villain interrupts their thoughts again. When Hero hums in apparent confusion, they clarify. "Tell me what you saw."
Hero almost chokes on the air, sitting upright despite the heavy pounding in their temples. "W-why?" They stutter out, already regretting their visit.
"I want to know what's in there." It's a simple sentence, but it claws at Villain's throat, unwilling to be uttered. They force the words out, turning their head to look at Hero's form on their sofa.
Hero's voice is guarded when they finally respond. "You had repressed it for a reason, Villain."
"Hero, you, of all people, know it's going to haunt me forever unless I deal with it," Villain counters, earning a quiet grunt from their nemesis.
"You can't deal with what's in there," they mutter, rubbing a hand over their face. A part of them knows Villain is right - the same one that is spurring them to try and undo some of the damage, to give Villain a chance of a clear mind. But there is another one. One that is scared of making it worse, both for Villain and themself. One that is terrified of even the thought of going through the darkness behind Villain's gaze again. One that cannot bear the pain that comes with it.
"Please," Villain speaks again, causing Hero to flinch at their selfishness as they are dragged out of their mind. How dare they be scared for their own well-being when Villain is... "Please," Villain whispers, the pleading tone cutting through Hero's chest.
"Villain, I-" They cut off, springing to their feet in a rush of anxiety. "Okay, if you want to do it, I can, um... try to unearth those things and undo some of the damage, but.."
"But what?" Villain asks, getting up as well. They are acting equal parts excited and reckless, and they know it.
"Some things might be too much," Hero starts, pacing through the bedroom in broad strides. "It might not work, or go wrong, or..."
Villain reaches out, stopping their panicked race from the door to the window and back, "I don't care."
They try to reassure Hero with a slight curve of their lips. But that only makes Hero explode. "I do! I don't want to cause more damage than there already is!"
It's a fair concern, Villain admits to themself. But they are far past the point of no return. "Hero, I was brainwashed, but it failed. The things done to my head are much worse than you taking a peak or even a walk."
"It's not- Christ, you don't understand!" Hero exclaims in utter frustration. They are scared, Villain understands. With a soft exhale, they place a hand on Hero's forearm, drawing them closer.
"You've seen what the nightmares are like," Villain's voice is low and pained; their fingers cold against Hero's skin. "That's every day for me. Every damn day. For six years now. I can't take it anymore, so if there's a way for you to fix it, I'll take the risk."
"I could damage you permanently," Hero protests, but it's weak. They know the hell that Villain lives in - they've seen it firsthand.
"I don't care," Villain shrugs with annoying nonchalance. "I'd rather lose my mind than keep going through this."
"Fine," Hero growls, sure that they will come to regret this decision. "Alright, fine."
As soon as they agree, Villain's demeanour changes. "What do you want me to do?"
"Lie down," Hero mutters, solemn. They wait for them to get onto the bed before sitting by their side and cradling their face with both hands.
"I want you to look into my eyes and think of the last thing you remember before the, um... experiment on you," they instruct, the internal battle still raging within them. But there is no way back now. Not after they gave Villain hope.
"Okay," Villain nods, meeting Hero's gaze with their tormented one.
"I'll get you through this," Hero continues to hold their head, and, as tender as they can, they delve into Villain's mind, only this time it's more intentional and slow. Layer by layer, they go deeper, diving into Villain's mind with gentle determination. They live through every day Villain spent in the dungeons, watching the light bulb spin around, circling them until they are reduced into hypnosis. Then come the sedatives, the withdrawal delirium, electricity, waterboarding, the light bulb again, sedatives, water...
Villain blacks out by the time Hero reaches the end of their torment - the day they escaped from the ground floor of the ministry six years ago, with a broken mind and unabashed rage against everything that place represented. Hero falls against the mattress, their entire being pierced by a phantom ache. They bury their face into the pillow, muffling the shuddering sobs ripping out from their throat.
Villain knows something is off the moment they gain some sort of awareness in the morning. They aren't entirely awake yet, but they can tell. They can feel it. Something feels off. Or better yet, it feels right. Right, and light, and clear... Gods, their head feels clear. Their blood stills at the thought, eyes flying open like they've been burnt. They glance around in agitated disbelief, only to freeze again, this time from the sight of Hero by their side. On their bed, curled into a ball. In any other situation, Villain would raise a brow and possibly tease Hero for the fetal position, but not today. They shift, leaning over their nemesis and cupping Hero's cheek. There are wet patches on their pillow - from crying themselves to sleep, Villain deduces, letting out a shaky exhale before pulling the covers up. They tuck Hero in, then lower themself back onto the bed, allowing their fingers to gently trace Hero's features.
They know their mind is not fully dealt with. They know there will be lingering nightmares for both them and Hero. They know it's far from over. But they also know that they won't be going through it alone. Not anymore.
Part 1
Masterlist
Taglist: @marvellousdaisy@alltimelowing@lateuplight@surplus-of-sarcasm@betwist @excusemeasibangmyheadonawall @enemies-to-idiots-to-lovers @miaowmelodie @thatonerandomauthor @hhabaddon @burningoutlikeicarus @daemonvatis @weepingcowboywolfbat @thelazywitchphotographer @kaiwewi @soul-of-a-local-bard @pigeonwhumps @aflyingsheepnamedrose @thatneptune @ohwellthatslifesstuff @worldsfromhoney @thiefofthecrowns @crow-with-a-typewriter @qualityrabbitsoup @stargeode @villain-life @villainsblood @whumpifi @glassthedumbass @silviathebard @misskowe @ayeshaturnedtoashes4444 @m4iloblu3 @silky-worm @doctorsawyer @philosophershroomie
Special tags: @m4iloblu3 @silky-worm @doctorsawyer @philosophershroomie
33 notes · View notes
Text
RACEWAY AU INCORRECT QUOTES
~~~
Kinger: "Do you think God stays in heaven because he too fears what he has created?"
Abel: "What the [%$!#] are you on?"
~
Gangle: "This is so sad...Bubble, play Despacito."
~
Caine: "I don't know if I give the air of knowing things, but I really don't."
Seth: "Your secret is safe with my indifference.
~
Loo: "Why are you smiling?"
Gummigoo: "Can't I just be happy?"
Pomni: "Jax crashed on the final lap."
~
Pomni: "Caine and I don’t use pet names."
Ragatha: "I see. Hey, what do bees make?"
Pomni: "Honey?"
Caine: "Yes, dear?"
Pomni: *sweats*
Ragatha: "Don't ever lie to my face again."
~
Pomni: "MY LIFE IS IN THE HANDS OF AN IDIOT!!"
Caine: *gesturing to himself and Seth* "No, no, TWO idiots."
~
Gangle: "I actually have a black belt."
Ragatha: "In karate?"
Gangle: "No, from Gucci."
~
Jax: "Look. I may not be a saint, but it's not like I’ve killed anybody. I’m not an arsonist (mostly). I’ve never found a wallet outside of an IHOP and thought about returning it but saw the owner lived out of state so just took the cash and dropped the wallet back on the ground."
Zooble: "Okay, that's really specific, and that makes me think that you definitely did do that."
~
Kinger: "A theif."
Zooble: "Thief?"
Kinger: "Theif."
Zooble: "I before E, except after C."
Kinger: "...Thceif."
Zooble: "No."
~
Caine: "Bad things keep happening to me, like I have bad luck or something."
Seth: "You don't have bad luck. The reason bad things happen to you is because you're a dumbass."
~
Ragatha: "If you had to choose between Jax and all the money I have in my wallet, which would you choose?"
Gummigoo: "That depends, how much money are we taking about?"
Jax: "Hey!"
Ragatha: "63 cents."
Gummigoo: "I'll take the money."
Jax: "HEY!!"
~
Loo: "WHY. why did you give Gangle a KNIFE?!"
Ragatha: "She said she felt unsafe."
Loo: "Now I feel unsafe!"
Ragatha: "I’m sorry... would you like a knife?"
~
Caine: "How's the most beautiful person here~?"
Pomni: "I don't know, how are they~?"
Caine: *flustered* "I-"
Seth: *from across the room* "I'm doing great, thanks!"
~
Jax: "We need to get through this locked door. Kinger, give me your credit card."
Kinger: Here.
Jax: "Thanks." *Pockets the card* "Zooble, kick down the door."
~
Pomni: "Seth, can I talk to you for a second?"
Seth: "Yeah, what’s up? Lemme guess. You and Caine are having problems and you want me to teach you how to kiss?"
Pomni: *blushing furiously* "What? No, stop that. I know how to kiss. I’ve read books."
Seth: *snorts*
~
Gangle: "Come on, I wasn’t that drunk last night."
Ragatha: "You were flirting with Zooble."
Gangle: "So what? They're my partner."
Ragatha: "You asked them if they were single."
Gangle:
Ragatha: "And then you cried when they said they weren't."
~
Caine: "Pomni, what do IDK, LY, and TTYL mean?"
Pomni: "I don’t know, love you, talk to you later."
Caine: "Ok, I love you too, I’ll just ask Kinger."
Pomni: *realizing* "WAIT-"
~
Pomni: "You have to apologize to Caine."
Seth: "Fine....Unfuck you or whatever."
~
Jax: "Sometimes I drink milk straight out of the container."
Kinger: "The cow???"
Jax: "What?"
Ragatha: "Kinger, W H Y?"
~
Pomni: "Do you have any skeletons in your closet?"
Abel: "You mean literally or figuratively?"
Pomni: "Honestly, the fact that I have to specify..."
~~~
A/N: Heh, these where fun. I might need to do more
36 notes · View notes
neocrias · 2 days
Text
Talk fast, romance!
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synopsis: you and minghao know that your one-night heated romance won't last, but you're both okay with that. at least for a while.
pairing: minghao x gn reader
wc: 3,7 k
genre/aus: fluff; suggestive
warnings: mentions of alcohol, mentions of sex, slightly suggestive, cursing (reader swears a lot), slightly based on the song "talk fast" by 5sos
— C'mon, this is boring, you can admit it. — The boy you just met whispers, a fainting smile in his plump lips - those which you've been staring at for the last half an hour, at least that was harsh to admit. The party was, indeed, boring, and the guy in front of you has been the only amusement you've had this night so far.
— I'm not saying it's not! I know it is. — You surrender, letting out an embarrassed laugh. — I'm just not sure I want to run away with... someone.
— With a stranger, you mean. — He implies, raising one of his eyebrows. You feel your cheeks heating, and you're glad about the very dim lights of the house you too are in, or else he'd see your messy state towards him. — I know it's weird, sorry, I shouldn't have asked.
— No! It's not that, it's just... — You start, wanting to explain yourself. You take a deep breath and stare at the dark pair of eyes in front of you. He's been so reliable the whole night, ever since he approached you for the first time when he saw you standing there, completely dislocated.
"I think my friends lowkey hate me", he said, scooching closer to you. "They just left me in the most dull party in the world."
It didn't seem like he was talking to you specifically, but more like a general affirmation out of despair. Nevertheless, you laughed at his situation, making him stare at you.
"Same."
"I'm Minghao." he presented himself, smiling at you, probably happy for the response.
"Hi, Minghao. So... you also made bad decisions tonight?"
"You have no idea."
Since this, you've talked about numerous topics, all diverse and different from the other. It was impressive: you two just clicked. It was as if something sparked between the two bored and self-sufficient souls of that party, and you started having more fun than you've had in like, weeks.
And now, he was kind of suggesting that you two make another bad decision that night: leave. Although you felt like Minghao could not be a bad person at all, you still had an uncertainty about this. What if...?
— It's just that... I don't usually, you know. — You try yet again to explain, feeling a wave of embarrassment rush through you. Thank God you had some drinks earlier that evening in the hope of enjoying this lame-ass party, because now they could help bring you courage to say the words: — I don't usually sleep with guys like that. In the same night.
I mean, you kind of wanted that. Maybe pass through it for the first time. Minghao made you feel it: he was just so interesting and attractive. You didn't feel ready yet, though, and your lack of one-night stand experiences made you nervous enough to overthink that. At least for now.
— Oh... — He opened his mouth, searching for words. — I was thinking of maybe getting some drinks or eating something...like, when I asked.
Then you wanted to dunk your head in the nearest trash can - but even that you couldn't do, since a random guy just threw up in the one next to you. He wasn't asking you for that, silly. How could you even think about it?
— I-I'm sorry, I thought-
— It's fine. — He shrugs, trying his best not to make the conversation even weirder. — I'm kind of flattered that you considered me for that, and don't get me wrong, you're totally my type, I just wasn't thinking of rushing things like that for now.
You laugh nervously, itching the back of your hand a little. Well, at least you know you're totally his type now. Points for me!
— I guess I ruined the conversation, right? — You joke, trying to ease things.
— You know how you could fix it? By letting me take you to this nice food stand I know. — Minghao offers once more.
You didn't know it yet, but he was completely mesmerized by you. Never in his life he felt this instant chemistry with someone else, and he hoped entirely that you felt at least a little like that too, so that you both could just drop that horrendous party that Seungcheol insisted on him going to and hit the road to anywhere you could keep your witty conversation.
You were quick, smart and laughed at his jokes. He had to spend more time with you - in an actually habitable place - even if it was just for the rest of the night. Or he knew he'd regret it forever.
— Yeah, let's just go.
— You can bring a friend if you prefer...wait, really!? — Minghao interrupts himself at your acceptance, smiling widely.
— Sure. I'm hungry and this party sucks, I mean, who made this playlist?
— Thank God. — He rolled his eyes and grabbed your hand, starting to lead you out of there. — And it was Hoshi, by the way.
— Who?
— My friend is in charge of DJing. He's just never done it before. — Minghao flashes you a last smile before turning his back to you, pulling you through the immensity of people glued together. You throw out a little laugh and let yourself be pulled away to what could be either the best night of your life or something you'd regret immensely.
The feeling of Minghao's hand in yours makes your body shriek in euphoria. The heat of the place, combined with the heat of the contact made you feel secure. Yeah, it's definitely going to be the first alternative.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
— I swear it was right here. — Minghao emphasizes, pointing at the ground next to him. You smile, a bit shy. After so much swearing, you knew he wasn't lying, but it was still a little odd that the first place he wanted to take you to was a totally empty street. — Man, they serve the best tteokbokki in town, I can't believe they're not here tonight out of all nights.
— It's fine, we could go somewhere else.
— I'm so sorry about that. — He shrugs, defeated. — If you want to just go home, I understand-
The boy is interrupted by some loud laughter followed by other big laughter and people's sounds. He carefully moves to glance behind, and your attention goes to the unlit alley adjacent to the street you both were at. Minghao raises an eyebrow, smiling at you and running to grab your hand once again that night.
He pulls you through the alley and you take a deep breath, fully trusting the guy leading you.
You pass through the dark small street only to be greeted with countless colorful lights. A whole avenue completely filled with food trucks and food stands, people all over the place, laughing, eating, and having fun. The smokes coming out of barbecue stands and fires lit through the estabilishments heat the cold of the evening and you feel almost overwhelmed when Minghao turns to you, smiling proudly.
— I told you so.
Your mouth opens completely, half by shock and half because you were really starving. All the different smells, the sights of food, the neon lights that surrounded the buildings around you and the colorful tents full of people were a blast to your senses, and seeing Minghao all smiley was definitely a plus - he looked so cute.
You shake your own thoughts, trying to be rational for the first time in the night. It’s fine, this was an adventure with a pretty guy - but it won’t last forever. It’s likely that the both of you don’t ever get to see or talk to each other again after this night, so keeping your hopes on the low is the intelligent decision to make now. After all, this is what relationships are now - how would you know that Minghao actually wanted more from you than just a nice evening? He probably wouldn’t, anyways.
“That’s okay”, you think, letting him guide you through the stands as you barely have time to contemplate the vision passing right behind you, “I’ll take what I can get from this.”
The boy stops all of a sudden, causing you to almost bump into him. Minghao closes his eyes as he absorbs the familiar smell of his favorite street-food and you can swear his skin glows more than it seemed like at the party - or maybe that’s just an effect of the iridescent street. 
— We’re here. — He affirms, smiling. You smile back, looking at the small orange tent with a metal small truck underneath. An elderly lady hummed silently as she flipped the sticks of tteokbokki on the spicy sauce of her improvised kitchen. The smell was, indeed, amazing, and the vapor coming out of the fire she had lit made your face heat up a little bit as you approached the stand.
Minghao made the order for you, adding some beverages and other couple snacks. Both you and him decided to skip the alcohol, since the drinks you’ve had at the party were already sinking in, and being drunk in the middle of the street wasn’t exactly what you wished for.
And down deep, you hoped that Minghao skipped the alcohol for the sole reason of remembering the night. And remembering you. But you tried not to feed these ideas.
— Shit. — You distractedly whimper as the rice dough fills your mouth, completely steaming and completely spicy. Minghao widens his eyes, pouting a little in your direction as he helps you blow the stick once more, in hopes of making it colder and edible. After you can finally cool off your mouth, you let out some laughter, being followed by the boy in front of you.
— Hey, be careful. — He warns, half kind and half teasing. You feel the pit of your stomach bubbling with something, but you try to believe it was just the hot food entering your systems. — So, what do you think? — Minghao points at the place surrounding you, and you almost sigh in contemplation.
— So much better than that damn party. — It’s all you can say, receiving a loud and gorgeous laugh from him. — And the food is great, too.
— I knew you’d like it. — He smiles tenderly. — Everyone does.
You hum in response, nodding as you take another bite from the stick. Minghao watches you intently, somewhat mesmerized that he had the guts to ask you out so suddenly. He wasn’t used to being a rushed or impatient person. He felt a little weird, but in a nice way he couldn’t really explain.
— Twenty-one question game. — He suggests before he can even stop himself. Your shy smile reveals you liked his idea, and Minghao shifts in the small bench of the tent to take a better look at you. — Favorite color?
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
— Your oldest memory? — Minghao asks, strolling casually next to you through the familiar alley you’ve passed before. After some more eating and drinking, such as countless games and questions that turned infinite - since none of you were tired of hearing each other - you decided to head somewhere else. Where? You still had no idea. 
— Well…I remember my old house’s garden very vividly. And butterflies I guess. — You let yourself be surrounded by the darkness of the narrow street, distancing yourself from the noises and lights of the food market. The nocturne air turns colder as you both walk, and you glance at the full moon above you. 
— Gosh, you’re so cute. — Minghao giggled, amused. You try to repress a smile, but fail.
— What’s your oldest memory? — You change the topic of the conversation, turning to look at Minghao abruptly. Not expecting your agility, Minghao is caught by surprise when you bump into his chest, tripping and almost falling to the ground. He is quick to hold onto one of your wrists, pulling you closer by the waist. 
He barely reacts to your proximity, still smiling fondly until he realizes the dubious smile you had in your lips as you analyzed his face so closely. Minghao’s smile disappears little by little, focusing too much on your lips and in the fresh air surrounding you both in the empty alley as your breaths mixed slowly. 
You lift your chin slightly to deviate your look from his lips to his eyes, but Minghao is faster and leans on, brushing your lips softly as he waits for confirmation. You close the space between you, taking his lips on yours fully and eagerly as his grip on your wrist turns lighter, releasing your hand to grab your face. His other hand stops at your waist, caressing the spot as he pulls you even closer, feeling your bodies completely glued together.
Your lips move in sync and you could swear at this moment you’ve never felt this much chemistry with anyone else - it’s as if a new world revealed itself to you through Minghao’s grasp on you. You pull some strands of his hair as your hands run through his neck, making him shudder. Without noticing it, he softly led you until your back met one of the walls of the alley. The pressure against you helped you regain forces, deepening the kiss and earning a groan from Minghao.
Your hands were quick, and so were your heartbeats. Minghao’s hand that relaxed at your waist fell silently to your ass, grabbing it slowly while waiting for a refusal or a complaint that didn’t come. At this point, he could genuinely take you home. You’d say yes. Fuck if you weren’t into one-night stands. Fuck everything. You were enjoying this night much more than you could’ve ever imagined and you didn’t want it to end.
A loud metallic noise echoed right next to you both, startling you. Minghao suddenly distanced himself to take a look at whoever had interrupted you and you almost cursed at the cold that you felt without him. Your eyes widened, feeling the embarrassment for being caught in such a delicate situation.
That was when your vision settled on a small, furry thing, clumsy between the trash cans. 
— Fuck. — You bring your hand to your chest, feeling your blood flowing through every vein. — It’s a kitten. Cute. — You try to shake away the awkwardness as Minghao turns back at you to release the most adorable laugh you’ve ever heard coming through someone’s lips. The lips you’ve just kissed.
Suddenly, your heart skips a beat. How could he be so endearing? And you didn’t even know him!
— My grandmother knitting. — He blurts out, smiling at you as he backs away to give you some space. — The oldest memory, I mean.
— Perfect. — You smile in amusement, straightening up and distancing yourself from the wall behind you. 
— Shall we go? — He suggests opening the path for you. 
— Wait, I know a place close to here! — You exclaimed, excited. Minghao just nodded as you took the lead this time. 
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
— I don’t think this is going to work… — Minghao pronounces it rationally, but a bit of apprehension escapes from his mouth, making you giggle. You turn to look at him, clumsily walking down through the rocks of the small hill. You extend one of your hands, offering help, but Minghao does not accept it, promising he’s fine. 
You finish your way down, getting to your secret spot as the boy behind you follows. The small pavement below the bridge was perfect to watch the late night city lights reflected through the thin river that passed right through it. With a sigh, Minghao stops by your side, careful not to fall into the water as he adapts.
— That’s definitely…a new perspective. — He comments, approving your location. — I’m usually on top of it. — He points at the bridge above, perfectly shielding you both in its arched form. 
He could see the charm in the place. You could basically see all the city from below, but no one could see you. It felt comfortable. It also felt secretive, and that helped the tingling sensation he kept on feeling all the time he looked at you - it’s almost as if you two were the only people in the world on that night.  
You breathe in the humid air, feeling it through your lungs as you enjoy the silence with Minghao. None of you said a word, but you also didn’t feel like you needed to. It was comfortable to be like this.
— I’ve never done anything like this before. — You suddenly confess, feeling easy next to the boy you had just met. The phrase was suspended into the air, but Minghao got it perfectly.
— Me neither. — He agreed, resolute. 
And with that, both of you understood how special that night was. That sank into your heart, and you felt a deep urge for it not to end - which was impossible, considering the fast pace with which the hours went by. You felt a shiver through your spine, and caressed your own arms for heat. Minghao was fast to remove his own jacket and carefully put it around your shoulders, letting his hands rest in there for a few seconds. You glanced at him from up close, and he softly touched your chin, lifting it tenderly. He closed his eyes, feeling your scent and resting your foreheads together for a while. You also closed your eyes, embracing the feeling of the night - “if this is bound to end soon, I might as well live it fully”. You were the first one to initiate the kiss. 
Differently from earlier, this kiss was truer, more calm and experienced than rushed and passionate. Your lips looked for each other as if they’ve been familiar for a whole lifetime. Jesus, how could you feel like this over a guy you met hours ago?
— Can we go to my place? — Minghao urged in a whisper as he broke the kiss first. You could not help but to widen your eyes at his proposition, feeling odd this time. — Trust me.
And you did. 
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
It was a different view of the city, for sure. Not that you were enjoying it that much from where you were at - after all, Minghao’s lap wasn’t exactly a tourist point, “but it could be…”
You moved in a hurry, your legs on both sides of his seated figure in the sun lounger as you pressed your bodies together once more. The air from the top of the building should be cold, but you couldn’t feel it if your life depended on it. Not with all the heat surrounding the both of you.
When Minghao invited you to his place, he made a risky move. You felt like accepting anything at that point, but his offer ended up being much more gentle - and now you were at the rooftop of his apartment, all alone, being nothing but gentle. 
Your dress was a mess of wrinkles by now, and his jacket was long gone, thrown somewhere on the dirty floor of the open place. And, once again, your lips were on his. And you didn’t want to let it go for the world.
Your hands move fast through his torso and chest, exploring it through the fabric of his t-shirt as he presses his fingers on your waist like you are going to escape at any moment. You move your hips, feeling a heat growing in your stomach at every second now, and even though you didn’t do anything yet, you feel like you could burst.
With a soft whimper, you gasp for air, ending the kiss for a few seconds as you look at Minghao’s big eyes and swollen lips. He looks like a perfect picture, but something glowing on him catches your attention. The sunlight, coming right from behind you. 
— The sun is rising! — You exclaim, excited, turning to look at the beautiful scene that unveils before your eyes, you snug next to Minghao in the sun lounger, trying to watch the mix of colors.
— I know. He does it everyday. — Minghao groans, frustrated by the lack of contact, making you laugh. You scooch even closer, leaning your head on his chest as you circle his waist with one of your arms.
You peacefully watch the sun coming up, little by little, minutes that seem like long hours. You feel Minghao’s breath above you, and his lips hover on the top of your head, leaving there a small kiss. 
That’s when you realize: the night is over, and so is the dream, and so is whatever that you and Minghao had. You could talk again, you could meet through your mutual friends, but nothing would ever be this again. No night could ever be like this one. And it was over, forever.
You feel like watering your eyes because of this could freak him out. You aren’t even sure if he felt the same about you, and you don’t want to ruin the beautiful evening you guys had because of your own internal drama. Maybe he just saw you as this random girl he made out with for the night, and that’d be fine too - but you felt a tiny bit of that magical feeling tearing apart.
— I… I have to go to work. — You mumbled, decided. Minghao stiffened below you, and you felt his grip on your waist tighten a little. 
— Oh, I see… — He whispers back, clearly affected, but still not letting you go. Minghao tried to come up with millions of rational and healthy reasons for you to stay - but none of them worked, and he couldn't just say the truth: that he really wanted you to stay. That he wanted to pass the day with you, and the next night too. That’d be crazy, desperate even, and he didn’t want to freak you out. 
So he finally gives in, loosening the grip on you, and trying not to look devastated while doing it so. Your heart sinks feeling his hand move away, but you try to hold the disappointment in your face.
“What did you think?”, you ask yourself, “that he’d ask you to stay after you throw the most irrefutable fact on his face? that he, a rational and cool guy as he is, would ask you to skip work and stay with him?”
— I’m sorry, but… — Minghao starts, clumsily, as you tidy your clothes, ready to stand up. — Can’t you stay? I mean, do you really have to go? — He sounded hopeful. Sad, but careful.
Your eyes meet his and a silent plea fills the air as your heart races once again.
— Fuck, no. — You sigh, giving in. — I don’t.
Your smiles widen, and the morning breeze swifts gently as you feel a different type of feeling flowing. 
Work can wait for a while.
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jo-harrington · 1 day
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Chuck (Eddie Munson)
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Summary: It's just a regular closing shift at Benny's. Easy peasy. Nothing bad could possibly happen.
Word Count: 3.5k
Characters: Eddie, Jeff, Benny Hammond
Themes/Warnings: Boys will be boys, friendship, smutty intrusive thoughts, Masturbation(?), Food Fucking, Eddie has an unspecified romantic partner (could be Steve, could be Reader, could be anyone that's not what this story is about), Song Fic, What's a Little Psychological Torture Between Friends…
Note: You know what? In true unhinged fashion, I had to write this for @courtingchaos on her birthday and not only that but give her some credit here. This was born from us being stuck in a car on Lake Shore Drive, hangry and a little slap happy, on the way to Navy Pier after I witnessed something that was probably very similar (in the most innocuous way) at a suburban Burger King.
Meg, you are my life. My world. You are my Cheese. Burger. And this one's for you. Happy Birthday.
Thank you AGAIN to @dr-aculaaa for the beta and @deathbecomesthem for some of the diner lingo. Disclaimer that I never worked at a diner so this is probably horribly inaccurate...but just suspend your sense of disbelief if you have.
You can find my masterlist here.
Please do not interact if you are not 18+.
Enjoy!
If anyone wants to get the full effect of this fic, you need to put Mr. Roboto on repeat for the duration of your time reading.
---
5:55PM
Jeff stared at the clock as he wiped down the counter.
Every tick of the second hand had him gritting his teeth a little more, enough where he should probably worry that he was gonna crack a tooth. All because Eddie was late for his closing shift.
Their closing shift.
And not just late, late again. For the third time in as many days they worked together.
If he even showed up.
Now Jeff wasn't one to complain. Shit, Eddie was the one to suggest that he apply at Benny's in the first place and put a good word in for his best friend.
Ben was getting a little older and wanted to enjoy what was left of his youth while he still had it, instead of solely being stuck behind his grill for the rest of his life. An extra waitress on the weekends, an extra line cook during the week, and the business ran smoothly, even when he decided to take a day off.
And Eddie was pretty much employee of the month, knowing all of the regulars orders like the back of his hand.
Until Jeff started getting scheduled alongside him.
Until Eddie started going on dates, and started "going steady" with someone.
Until Eddie started playing hooky to go and suck face and god knows what else while parked up at the quarry.
Jeff let his fist slam against the counter as another minute ticked away, only for the bell of the door to chime and Eddie walk in, shrugging his apron on and shedding his leather jacket in a flustered rush.
"Sorry I'm late," he said with an easy smile on kiss-swollen lips. Jeff rolled his eyes at the sight and at the apology. "Oh come on, I promise I'll be on time tomorrow. Scout's honor." Eddie crossed his finger over his heart.
"You weren't a scout," Jeff retorted.
"Hey now," Eddie teased, starting in on one of his typical Munson-isms that usually ended up in forgiveness or forgetfulness. "I actually was. For one day before some snot-nosed kid pushed me over and I accidentally said fuck. Then they asked me to leave. But once a scout, always a scout."
Jeff hummed and turned on his heel to push back into the kitchen and start prepping for the dinner rush.
The thing was...they worked really well together. They had a good routine of noting what tasks needed to be done throughout the night. It's not like the diner was ever that busy on weeknights and Benny had been doing it alone for years, but it was nice to have someone you got along with at work.
Well it was nice...when they were there. It was nice when your work buddy was actually reliable and helped you out, which made Jeff feel bad because Eddie was his friend, his best friend. But Jeff could let Eddie's luck and charisma let him slide through his responsibilities.
So Eddie was about to find out what kind of hell it was when you were in the weeds alone.
---
Jeff had gone out to take an order when the phone rang.
Eddie grabbed the receiver with a quick "yello'" only to get a familiar voice rasping on the other end.
"Can I speak to Jeffrey please?" came the reply from someone dramatically sounding like Edith Bunker.
Eddie rolled his eyes. "Gareth, I know it's you," he sighed.
"No, this is Jeff's grandma," the younger boy kept up the ruse, snickering a little at the end. "I need to talk to him."
Eddie let his head roll back on his shoulders as he heard the stifled giggling of his friend over the line, and then he peeked his head out of the passthrough.
"Jeff!" he called out. "Your grandma's calling."
Jeff donned an exaggerated and fake look of concern; he jogged across the diner and grabbed the receiver from Eddie's hand.
"Hello?" he answered and Eddie watched as his expressions got more animated, as did his voice. "Grandma? Oh no, what happened...an accident? You need help? You need me to leave work and come home right away?"
"What?!" Eddie shrieked and reached out to snatch the receiver back from Jeff's hand. He placed it against his ear but only heard Gareth laughing and then the ring tone. He was about to ask Jeff what the hell was going on, only to find him pulling his apron over his head. "Come on now, where do you think you're going?"
"I've gotta leave," Jeff shook his head frantically. "It's my grandma, she's in the hospital, I've gotta go."
"Jeff, come on."
"There's no one else to take care of her."
"Seriously. Quit it."
"You'll be ok by yourself tonight right?" Jeff ignored everything Eddie said and looked at him expectantly as he dug his hand in his pockets for his car keys.
For a moment, Eddie felt the panic rise within him; he figured Jeff was a little upset that he bailed the past few nights but...seriously it wasn't anything that Jeff couldn't handle.
Was his friend really that mad?
"Listen I'm sorry I bailed on work a few times this week," he apologized, but Jeff just shook his head and pulled out a roll of quarters.
Then another.
Then another.
And the panic Eddie had faded into curiosity, then realization.
No, Jeff wasn't mad; he was annoyed.
"Hey listen, it's just for tonight so I can check on my grandma, you'll be ok," Jeff explained as he walked over to the old jukebox in the corner of the dining room. He began loading the old machine up with quarters and punching buttons in rapid succession. "I'll even make it up to you. You can have all the tips in the tip jar from before you got here earlier and I'll put on some music that you'll like. Hey look, Ben took your advice and updated this a little.
"He even has your favorite Ed," Jeff glanced over his shoulder. "Styx."
Eddie groaned in loathing this time, thinking of the power ballads and synthesizer nightmares he was about to endure because his friend was gonna get back at him.
The Grand Illusion. Or worse Paradise Theater.
The records inside of the machine shifted as they queued up tracks for the next however-long Jeff had paid for.
"Don't do this Jeff," Eddie pleaded as his friend grabbed his jacket from the coatrack by the door. "I'll never skip work again. I promise. Just stay."
"But my grandma needs me Eddie..." he whined and then winked at Eddie before running out the door. "Have fun."
Eddie sighed and accepted defeat as the door shut and Jeff was gone, all while the sparkly synthesized voice began amidst electronic fanfare...
Domo Arigato Mr. Roboto...
---
7PM
You know what? It didn't start out that bad.
"You're wondering who I am," Eddie sang along and bopped to the beat as he flipped burgers on the flat top. "Secret, secret, I've got a secret."
He had food to cook and orders to take and he fell right back into the routine of those short staffed nights when Benny started to realize how much he valued his personal time, but right before Jeff was hired.
It would be fine.
And there was a little musical accompaniment? Even better.
He figured that he might start loading the machine up with quarters before his shifts from now on, instead leaving it up to the chance of the customers.
"Machine or Mannequin?" He did a little spin. "Secret secret, I've got a secret."
Eddie hadn't even realized that the song that started out the night--Mr. Roboto--repeated itself until he got back to the kitchen, and then it repeated again.
And again.
He had to admit it was growing on him though. Like a cancer, but still growing. So he either needed to adapt or it would kill him. The lyrics were catchy, he could dance to it a little, and there was a good beat that he could almost headbang to if he tried.
It wasn't even that he hated Styx, he just hated what Styx stood for. Mainstream popular music. It was commercial and sanitized. Yeah Babe wasn't that bad of a song. And neither was this one. Shit...if he really thought about it, was the band even really that popular? They were underdogs, and he always rooted for an underdog.
"With parts made in Japan," he sang into his spatula and slapped slices of cheese onto his patties for dramatic effect. "I am thee modern man!"
---
8PM
So if you see me, acting strangely, don't be surprised.
There was a little bell at the pass that got hit whenever an order was up.
Of course, with Eddie being the only one working it didn’t need to get hit.
Still, every time Eddie passed it, he just had to tap his hand on the bell along with whatever verse or instrumental was playing.
I’m a man who needed someone and somewhere to hide.
It wasn’t getting to him.
No. Not at all.
It was just a graduation from him playing air guitar with a broom and drumming on the counter with spoons.
Ding ding ding ding ding, ding ding ding ding ding.
Eddie tapped at the bell with both hands at the crescendo and then went to the walk-in to scream.
Nothing to worry about.
---
9PM
I’ve come to help you with your problems, so we can be free.
“Hey can you change the song at all? This one’s been repeating for a while.”
Eddie smiled tightly at the guy at the head of the long rectangular table and then dropped the blue plate special down in front of him with a clatter.
“It’s broken,” he explained, not wanting to get into it.
Several customers had asked already; it was getting as annoying as people who said they were tipping with kindness. Obviously if he could get another song on the jukebox, he would.
How many fucking quarters had Jeff put in there?
“Could you unplug it? Plug it back in again?”
He’d thought of that too.
But wasn’t it just his luck that they lived in the do-it-yourself amateur handyman Midwest…and the damn thing was wired into the wall itself.
And he really didn’t want to cut the line and have to explain to Benny how an electrical fire burnt down his diner.
“You know what?” Eddie took a slow, calming breath. “This is actually…my favorite song." There was a disbelieving blink. "A-and it’s my birthday.”
The withering look he received made him second guess burning down the place; it actually didn’t seem so bad after all. He could deal with Benny.
I’m just a man whose circumstances went beyond his control. Beyond my control. We all need control.
---
10PM
I am the modern man, who hides behind a mask…
Eddie wore his Freak label proudly.
He accepted it, everyone else accepted it.
But maybe this music was getting to him a little bit as he started noticing of the different inanimate objects around Benny’s that he could potentially fuck.
That was a level of Freak that he really hadn’t embraced yet.
So no one else can see my true identity!
Well, it was sort of always there simmering beneath the surface. He had been a horny teenager and was now a horny young man. There was always a question about what objects he could stick his dick into.
But he’d tried to curb that curiosity after the pool noodle incident.
Now though…he was far enough gone that things were starting to appeal to him again. And it scared him a little bit for those thoughts to pop up during work.
Not enough to stop though.
Domo Arigato Mr. Roboto. Domo. Domo.
First it was a bagel with the perfect hole.
Actually, was it even the music causing this? How dare that bagel look so damn fuckable. Cream cheese wouldn’t be the best lube, he had to admit. But he didn’t mind trying. Unfortunately that bagel was needed for someone’s sober-up sandwich.
Then there was a hole in the vinyl of one of the booths. He stared at it every time he brought out an order or bussed a table. Eventually he couldn’t help himself and he lightly ran two fingers over it and then plunged them inside the hole, like a lover would, only to find the edges were jagged and rough…and he was disappointed that it wouldn’t be the most pleasurable experience.
He wasn’t one to say no to a little bit of teeth when getting his dick sucked but that wasn’t what he was looking for right now.
At one point he even considered fucking the jukebox itself. Get it to shut up once and for all.
The logistics weren’t right.
Where would he even put his cock? Just rub the head of him along the coin slot while he jerked off? Pass.
His depravity needed to be put on hold though, because as he was in the walk-in trying to cut a channel into a head of iceberg that might be the perfect fit for him, he spotted a tub of hamburger with a label in Benny’s chicken scratch saying “discard” with the date.
He froze and let his thoughts swirl before he shook his head and put the iceberg down. He slammed his hand against his forehead as though that would make his internal monologue right itself.
Because what the hell was he doing?
Regardless of the absolute torture he was enduring, he was still at work and had a job to do.
Why was he trying to fuck a head of lettuce? Or fingering a hole in a booth. No, he was absolutely losing his mind, he needed to control himself, he needed to get back to work.
He was about to exit the walk-in when he glanced back at the tub.
“Can't forget that tonight,” he muttered to himself as a reminder.
Then back into the kitchen he went.
Domo Arigato Mr. Roboto. Domo. Domo.
---
11PM
“Thank you very much Mr. Roboto,” Eddie muttered as he dropped maraschino cherries into milkshakes. His voice was ragged, desperate. Pleading. “For doing the job nobody wants to.”
“Thank you very much Mr. Roboto,” he deadpanned as he numbly swept the floor. “For helping me escape when I needed to.”
Thank you.
Thank you.
I wanna thank you.
Please thank you.
Thank you thank you.
Thank you thank you.
“Thank you,” Eddie smiled, as the joy finally die inside of his body as he rang out the last customers. But it was rapidly born once again as he waved goodbye. “Thank you thank you!”
---
12AM
The doors were locked, the lights in the dining room closed.
And Eddie stood in the kitchen with a lit cigarette in his mouth as he concentrated on the task at hand.
The problem was plain to see. Too much technology. The jukebox still played out on the floor.
Machines to save our lives? No. Machines dehumanize.
He shouldn’t be fucking the jukebox or a head of lettuce or a bagel. No. He needed something warm and malleable.
Living.
Or well…close enough.
It was the perfect idea! Instead of taking it right to the dumpster, he’d taken the tub of ground chuck out of the walk-in and let it get to room temp at the end of his shift, and now he was standing there molding it into the right shape.
He was ready and aching after palming himself in anticipation. He’d meticulously wrapped his hard cock in plastic wrap, for lack of a better option. He needed this.
He deserved this.
Why hadn’t he ever thought of this before?
The time has come at last…
He put out the cigarette in the meat then lined up with the channel he'd crafted. He hissed as he sunk in—synthesized angels sung all around him, guitars strumming in harmony—and finally felt relief for the first time all night.
Secret, secret, I’ve got a secret.
His hips rocked in time with the beat, driving deeper and deeper. He felt the slightest bit of cold when he finally bottomed out, the center of the Chuck not entirely at room temp yet. It was an unexpected thrill and he shuddered as pleasure shot through him.
He let his head fall back and he laughed with the feeling, laughed uncontrollably, and the sound echoed through the diner, forever scarring the walls with wicked glee.
To throw away this mask.
It was strange, fucking what was essentially a mass of viscous sludge. Not bad, just strange. Not entirely wet but not dry either. Maybe it was perfect actually, something he never knew he needed. Just for him. A little slice of cheese...er, heaven...just for him.
Especially when he formed meat to suit his desires as it shifted.
That feral grin stayed on his lips as he worked himself to completion, as he pumped mercilessly.
Secret, secret, I’ve got a secret.
And somewhere in all of the hubbub, Eddie came to the conclusion that although it wasn’t perfect, he could get used to it if he had to.
Because he had to.
He'd be stuck here forever, lost in Dennis DeYoung's vocal prison until the end of time.
Now everyone can see my true identity.
He thrust harder and faster, panting and kneading and clenching until all he knew was the meat and secret secrets and his own depravity as he spiraled downwards further into insanity.
I'm Kilroy.
He felt it coming.
Kilroy.
Cumming.
Kilroy.
It exploded out of him with those last few emphasized beats of the synthesizer. He felt the cling wrap bulge with his spend, felt the tingles along his spine and through his limbs as his orgasm shot through his body.
He leaned over, satiated, until his nose brushed the meat in sensuous exhaustion.
Kilroy.
He could hear his pulse in his ears, along with a buzzing din of tinnitus, and the ticking of a clock out in the dining room.
But where he expected the beginning of the next round of torture, Eddie only heard silence.
He breathed heavy, broken breaths. Gulps of air that felt like too much oxygen and not enough at the same time. He felt lightheaded.
It was over.
His punishment finally over.
He closed his eyes and thanked whatever God or Demon gifted him with this boon, and then his eyes shot open and he stood straight up as he stared at the mess he made.
"Fuck."
---
The Next Day, 5PM
Jeff felt like the cat that ate the cream when he drove to work the following day.
He felt a little bad about what he’d done to Eddie, and he had all the intention to make it back to Benny’s around 7 or 8, but Gareth had convinced him not to.
“Come on,” he’d told Jeff. “You know Eddie’s gonna get a good laugh out of it.”
“Yeah! Besides,” Dave interjected. “Shame on him for leaving you up shit’s creek so much. Hopefully this’ll teach him a lesson.”
And Jeff agreed with them.
He and Eddie were friends but that didn’t mean Eddie could walk all over him.
He was glad to see the van parked in Benny’s lot when he arrived for his shift, and as far as he could tell, everything was normal when he walked in.
Ben was at the grill and Eddie at the counter.
Actually, everything looked better than normal. Everything in the diner looked squeaky clean and under the smells of cooked food, there was a tinge of the disinfectant they used to deep clean.
“You must’ve had the slowest night ever if you did a deep clean of the place,” Jeff clapped a hand on Eddie’s back and noticed that Eddie stiffened under his touch. “What time did all those quarters run out?”
Eddie laughed nervously and scratched the back of his neck.
“Little after midnight,” he chuckled. “And it was fine. But, uh, now I know better than to fuck with you again.”
“Yeah you’re on time today, you beat me here!”
Eddie grabbed his arm as he passed and then leaned in close, voice pleading and desperate.
“I’ll never be late again, won’t be a no show, but please…don’t ever subject me to that hell again. Please.”
"Scout's honor," Jeff cackled.
Upon Eddie’s look of relief, Jeff headed back to get himself settled.
He chatted with Benny for a second before the older man left for the night. But as he went to the walk-in to get more onions to chop, he noticed something.
“Hey Ed!” He called out through the pass and Eddie turned. “Thanks for tossing that ground chuck! Or…Domo arigato I guess heh.”
He turned back to the task at hand, so he didn’t notice all the color drain from Eddie’s face.
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very-uncorrect · 4 months
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I'm gonna die one day oh my god holy shit fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck there's no afterlife oh holy shit fuck help oh my god no no no no no
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mirmidones · 13 days
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3.40 i woke up bc i was cold and needed to pee and now i can't fall back asleep i keep thinking of the people i accidentally ghosted. is it ghosted if there was no intent to ghost? i feel so bad and it's not even like i don't think about them i often do think "i should really reply to them... once this is over ill properly sit down and write them... " and then i don't bc something else happens and im dealing with that and the longer i leave it unanswered the more difficult it becomes because i feel so guilty and therefore want to do things properly not half assed but bc i feel so guilty a part of me also tends to avoid it even more. if i do this to you just know i'm really sorry and ill get back to you i swear
#i have this friend i didn't reply to him for 6 months and then i did with lots of apologies he replied no worries haha AND I WENT AND DIDN'T#REPLY TO THAT FOR ANOTHER 6 MONTHS and the thing is when i had texted him in january i was falling ill and then i was ill for more than a#week so i wasn't really in a condition to reply. and since bc of the illness i had missed some crucial classes and was in the middle of#exam session and i was really struggling so then too i delayed texting him. and then the second semester started and it was such a shitshow#and then i fell ill again and i thought to write him hey i was first ill then send i didn't reply to you and im ill now and im replying to#you 🫠. but then i didn't again#anyways last week i finally texted him like ''hey. how are you ? im really bad at keeping in touch im sorry. can i offer you lunch or dinne#one of these days to apologize and so that we can catch up a little?'' and he hasn't replied yet which is like obviously fine. id get it if#he didn't reply for 6 months or a year i'd pretty much deserves it id say. i'm just worried that he'll never reply bc i have fucked it up#entirely. the truth is all my lifd ive been used to seeing many people i care deeply about like once or twice a year without barely any#contact in between and when we're together again it's like time hasn't passed at all. we just pick up from where we left#the same goes with long distance friendships. to me#anyone ANYONE can tell you how little i reply. :(. still. i know it's not good. @ friend i hope you'll find it in you to forgive me and let#me treat you to lunch#god. side note there is something in this house that is triggering my allergy so bad whether its dust or cat blanket im having the worst#time#good night ill try to sleep again now#it took me one hour to write this post yes
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zevrans-remade · 11 months
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.
#so i finished my 4 out of 4th 12 hour shift in a row last night and i'm literally so exhausted and i was glitching mid simple tasks 🤡✌️#my coworker asked to change shifts so he could have that one specific day as off#and he managed to do some very critical mistakes in his 4 days prior and that's considering his gf is often with him there#and i was the one suffering the consequences even if it's literally not my fault#ever since i've got this job i've been fixing so many mistakes of his i kept wondering who's the newbie here??#like i try to leave my shift as good as possible i clean everything check everything and do all my duties#and when i come here after his shifts it's.. a fucktonne of work mistakes and literal dirt like dude!!!#4 shifts in a row never again man never again i am so tired my brain is nerfed and i can only rest for 1 day today because tomorrow i'm#going to a doc;#my social battery is not just dead it's nonexistent at this point#i just want to lay in bed and not be percieved or interacted with for at least the same amount of days 😫#i really thought i could take a socially demanding and rather multitasking job without it taking hugest toll on my mental state huh???#and i had such a bad sleep too i had a very graphic and sickening nightmare which woke me up 2 hours after i fell asleep#and then i woke 2 more times after that and i feel so exhausted and not rested at all and so fatigued i can't even do anything#man for me my sleep being interrupted is the worst like i function better if i have a smaller amount of sleep but it's uninterrupted#than longer in hours but it gets interrupted and i wake up even once#sorry i come here once in few days vent post and then dissapearvckfkv 😭 i miss tumblr but have no energy currently to even rb anything 🥲#tbd
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lakemichigans · 2 years
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if i ever get murdered in my own home it’s because i convinced myself i was hallucinating while someone literally breaks in
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mashmouths · 4 months
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oh "the house that built me" by miranda lambert we're really in it now
#the dawn of the final day and i am doing better than i thought i'd be so far but i know i'm not going to be breathing when i drive back#what do you mean i won't be able to sit in my backyard or touch my walls and ceiling walking down the hallway. bc it won't be mine.#like what the fuck#i've been listening to bts on shuffle all day bc it's the only music i could handle that's how you know it's bad#speaking of bts 'moving on' is not exactly what i thought it would be lyrically but yeah the vibe is very correct#literally 이사 가자 정들었던 이곳과는 안녕 이사 가자 ... 텅 빈 방에서 마지막 짐을 들고 나가려다가 잠시 돌아본다 울고 웃던 시간들아 이젠 안녕#like come onnnnnnn this place does smell like us and i was already stressed about losing the house smells before namjoon brought it up 😒#i painted my closet doors so they'll be fresh for the staging and pictures and i had a moment where i felt 9 years old again looking at them#i won't be able to fill up my water bottle and taste home???? ever again??????????#the way my dad built half the house. he made the trim on my bedroom walls so they'd have a scalloped edge and match the toy chest he built#i won't hear my stupid ceiling fan rattling through the night threatening to fall on me?? ever again????#if you read all that sorry i'm very tired and too overwhelmed to be concise#i miss my dog :( we packed his ashes in the moving pod and my mom kept making jokes that he should go on the couch for the ride#fuck to live in a house that never knew him? freaking out a little! where i won't be able to hallucinate his nails on the tile coming down#the hallway to my room? or him ripping through the backyard? good lird#i think i need to go to bed ! i will probably feel worse tomorrow but that is okay :)#a post
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astrxealis · 9 months
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astarion... the man that you are.....
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#morning ^_^ !!! on a roadtrip rn w family so i am well <3 even if it is just turning 8 am <33#i am a morning person as much as i am a night owl actually ... before the pandemic i used to wake early even w/o an alarm on non school days#and i wake early less nowadays but i love when i get up early and i wish i could do so more but i hate sleeping too early lol#ANYWAY HI i hope you all are well. unfortunately now that i'm online again you all will be subjected to my random rambles.#not as bad on my priv twt where i talk about philosophical topics and the like an overwhelmingly amount but aha that is Fine !!!!!#i want to change my theme. i love you themis. but. aghghhhh to what... to what...#i wna practice graphic designing a bit bcs i suck (<- amazed at the abilities of my peers and out of practice at all)#errr i want to reference. mäneskin maybe (in the time i have been gone i have gotten obsessed w a new band <3 how very apollo of me. anyway)#'all is fair in love' ... ? 'valentine my decline is so much better with you' ..... ?#idk man. and what color scheme! and who!!!#vincent valentine is a choice esp bcs of ffviir. aerith is wnother just because i adore her so much. uhhh#zenos... because we are insane..... and thten i forgot every other single character. oops!#i am a nerd so i want something space themed this time actually. insert a bit of physics (physics nerd ^_^)#have i bragged (/lh) about how i'm the only person i know in my batch at my school who got perfect in the first physics exam#and that all my classmates and friends like gojng to me and call me 'sister (irl)' bcs i am in a catholic school#:3 i love physics ... man. makes me remember how much i love math And science. even if i do hate molecular bio sorry some of it is interesti#but GOD i hate learning about dna in school. just dna. everything else is literally okay i literally have on the origin of species i got it#for my bday i asked my friends to buy me it bcs they offered. fucking insane#yeah so (<- haha nerd) anyway i also grew up w bill nye my fav guy and sid the science kid and god little einstein was my favorite show#despite me probably watching a total of 5 episodes compared to others. oh my god.#and the way i would get . if i got anymore than 3 mistakes in a math exam my whole life i would have to hold back tears LMFAOOO oh god.#smh i swear if history class wasn't in filipino for my whole life before highschool i would have goddamn excelled#i still did but ... !!! only filipino subjects brought me down. tho i do love learning abt my language even if it also pisses me off ^_^#right where was i haha RIGHT ..... okay. ok. uhh i want an ff character ............ actually ff8 would be slay#or urianger. space fits too. astrologist man. and then i forgot everyone else. oops!#aha............ crystal exarch. but specifically the crystal exarch. or i'll just do mr squall leonhart or vincent valentine#space!!! my beloved... you can wait another time... i wish to reference the hit song valentine by mäneskin
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lymtw · 3 months
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It's three in the morning and the sound of your phone vibrating against the bed wakes you from your peaceful slumber. You lazily reach for the blinding light next to you, instantly knowing who's on the other end when you see the blue diamond emoji.
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"Hello..."
You were very much asleep, the raspiness in your voice making it that much more evident.
"Hey, sorry to wake you. Are you okay to talk for a bit?"
Satoru sounds like he's wide awake.
"Don't worry about it. What's up?"
You roll onto your side, your phone between your ear and your pillow. If you close your eyes for more than three seconds, you'll fall asleep again.
There's a slight pause between your response and his. Maybe the signal is bad or he didn't hear you.
"Is everything alright, Satoru?"
"I can't sleep."
He responds quickly this time. His tone didn't change. He didn't sound like he was in distress or too worried about the fact.
"Oh. Uh... have you tried drinking some chamomile tea? I personally don't like it, but when I need to rest, I suck it up and force myself to drink a cup."
He chuckles on the line. You always do what is best for you, even if it's not something you particularly enjoy.
"I think i'm just missing you a lot. Can I come over?"
It was strange to think he hadn't tried a tea remedy for his inability to sleep, but who were you to tell him that? Sleep deprivation does things to people.
"Right now? It's a little late, don't you think?"
You blink slowly, trying to adjust your blurry vision in the dark.
"I promise I won't fall asleep behind the wheel. I really want to see you. Please say yes."
You shut your eyes tightly and open them, your vision clearing up a little. When have you ever said 'no' to him? He always manages to change your mind when you do.
You sigh.
"Okay. You have the spare key to my apartment. I'm going back to sleep."
"I'll be there in like fifteen minutes. Love you, bye!"
You can hear the joy in his tone. He was genuinely so uncomfortable being alone with himself, that he had to wake you up so late at night to invade your space.
You knocked out again, once you hung up the phone. You were in such deep sleep that you didn't even notice when Satoru got to your apartment, or when he entered your room.
You did feel the bed weigh down when he laid down next to you, and your nose couldn't ignore his sweet, sweet scent.
"Baby," he whispered. "I'm here."
"Okay, now go to sleep," you mumble, your eyes still closed.
"Come here." He effortlessly turns you over and pulls you close, lifting your leg over his hip. His hand went up to your face, caressing your delicate, peaceful features before scattering kisses all over it, making sure to elongate the duration of the ones he leaves on your lips.
"Baby," he coos. "Come on, kiss me back."
He's like a dog—constantly begging for your attention. The thought makes you crack a smile, one Satoru does not miss.
"I know you're awake." He smiles, putting your leg back in place, before rolling over until he's on top you.
"Fucking hell, 'toru," you break, cracking up at how he had no remorse after crushing your body.
"There's my pretty baby. I'm so glad you're awake now."
"It's your fault," you grumble.
"If wanting to love you is a crime, then throw me in the slammer and toss the key." His nose dove into your neck, inhaling your scent deeply. "You're just so pretty, and you're all mine."
His affection was starting to evolve into more than lovey dovey kisses. His lips stung every time they met your delicate neck. His hands were roaming beneath your shirt, leaving goosebumps in their wake.
He loved the way your breathing quickened. It had him chasing more of the reactions associated with the hummed melodies.
"You are mine, right?" He knows the answer, but hearing you say it from time to time always makes him happy. His icy blue eyes can read your response before you even form it. He loves flustering you with eye contact tied with touches that burned with desire. To top it all off, he loves teasing you to see the way you scramble your response. "It's okay if you're not." He smirks, catching the way your eyes widened the slightest bit. "That's subject to change, isn't it?" He eggs on.
"I'm yours, Satoru. I belong to you," you say, making it crystal clear to him. "All yours." With this, he wouldn't doubt it again until the next time he wasn't with you.
"Yeah? You know, I would've done anything to hear those words from you." He leans down to kiss you, a spike of arousal hitting him when you bit his lip and sucked on it.
"Oh... you can't do that. I will put a baby in you." He has never said anything so seriously.
"I dare you to put a baby in me," you say, teasingly. You know he won't do it. He's not ready to share you yet.
"Keep acting like that and I will."
His lips ghost the column of your neck, trailing down your chest and lower to your abdomen. Your oversized gown of a t-shirt was the only thing standing between your body and his eyes. He pulled it up and off with a little help from you, tossing it aside after.
You were a little nervous about what was running through Satoru's head. He was devouring you with just his eyes and already you felt so flustered.
"God, don't ogle me like that, 'toru." You put your hands over your breasts—a makeshift bra to cover what he was staring at.
"Let me see you, baby," he pries, gently. He puts his hands on yours, not pulling them away as to not make you do anything you don't want to do. You end up moving your hands on your own, but turn away, unable to hold his gaze when he's watching you that way.
He cups your breasts, his thumbs swiping over your nipples, instantly making them pebble. He could feel the way you tried to press your thighs together, your relief disturbed by his body wedged between your legs. You tried your hardest to remain composed, but his fingers wouldn't let up. His eyes were glued to your face, watching intently until you let out a shaky breath.
"Mhm..." he hummed, grinning at your bashful attempt to stay quiet. "I know this is driving you crazy."
"Shut... up."
"If it isn't, why can I feel you rubbing up against my stomach."
You stop and your cunt throbs at the suddenness of it.
"Just let it out and we can move on. Let me hear that pretty little ah-"
"Fuck," you whimper, interrupting his instructive moan. Your back arches slightly off the mattress, your hands flying to grip his wrists, tightly.
"Good girl," he praises, his fingers letting off your tortured peaks. Little butterfly kisses are placed between your breasts, trailing down to your stomach, where he spends so much time eliciting giggles from you.
His fingers hook around the elastic band of your shorts and panties, pulling them both down in one swoop.
"I didn't know kissing turned you on so much," he says, eyeing the glossy remnants left in your underwear.
"'toru..." you whine, feeling somewhat embarrassed about the amount of arousal you feel at the simplest touches from him.
"What? I'm not complaining one bit. It's cute."
He slides two fingers between your folds, easily collecting your sweetness. You jolt at the sudden contact, looking at him with doe eyes.
"Oh, baby. I don't deprive you of my touch that much, do I?"
You shake your head as he continues to collect your nectar, his fingers dipping in slightly to fully coat his fingertips.
"My sensitive princess." He smiles, softly. "How many times do you wanna cum?"
He never asks you this, always just giving you everything he can give or what you can take. You go for a small number, not wanting to seem excessively needy.
"Maybe two times? Please?" Your voice sounds meek. Like you're asking him for the impossible.
Satoru just chuckles. "How 'bout we triple that number?"
"S-Satoru—fuck— just like that, like that!" Your head pushes back against the pillow, your hands beside your head, scrunching up the sheets.
This was the fourth orgasm. There was cum spotted over your inner thighs and sweat layered over both your bodies. He had driven you to insanity like he planned.
"More, baby?" He grunts, thrusting with his continuous pace.
"Please," you cry out, fresh tears welling in your eyes again.
Satoru loved watching the tears stream down your face because he got to lean down and kiss them away. He takes the opportunity to praise you— to tell you how good you're being for him.
Your back arched and you braced yourself for the intensity of your next orgasm. Satoru swallowed your moans, kissing you fervently through his own rush. His breathing stuttered when he felt your nails clawing at his back, and once again his cum spurted into you. His breathing was heavy through the nose due to his insistence of kissing you until he you patted him for air.
"Fuck," you muttered. You let out an out of breath laugh, your chest rising and falling quickly as you tried to even out your breathing.
"That's five, baby." He exhales sharply, leaning back and running a hand through his dampened locks. You look at him with twinkling eyes, a smirk being thrown in your direction from your admiration.
"Come here," you say, outstretching your arms towards him. Satoru immediately fills the vacancy, sighing when you rake your nails against the nape of his neck. "Want you to take your time with this last one."
He takes that as a green light to start up again. He guides his cock into you again, savoring the hum that leaves you when he stuffs you again and begins his slow rhythm.
"'toru?" Your voice sounded sultry to his ears.
"Hm?"
"This won't happen again. I hope you know that." You're trying your hardest not laugh or make any sounds that take from the meaning of what you're saying.
He had to raise his head to meet your gaze. Something in the way he looked at you made you believe that this would definitely happen again.
"I hope it does. I love having you under me."
"It's inconvenient. It's so late, 'toru. Why can't we fuck when i'm not trying to sleep? Like in the daytime, or earlier in the night?"
His lips trace your jawline, and you just know he's going for your neck. Satoru lives for pointing out the marks he left on you, the day after.
"Simple," he hums. "I want you to myself." His hips continue to rock into you at the same languid pace. "At night, nobody is gonna take you from me. You won't be distracted and I get all your attention to myself." He kisses your neck. "You're all mine at night. Nobody expects you to be awake."
You gasp when he hits a spot that aches deliciously.
"Come on, baby. Give it to me," he murmurs into your neck. You can feel the way his back ripples as he instinctively picks up the pace. He was overwhelming, thrusting deeper and deeper like he was trying to consume you. What was supposed to be a slow drive towards your final orgasm of the night, turned into him unapologetically using his stamina to lure everything he could out of you. He was almost too much with the way his mouth was ruthless towards your neck and the bruising grip he kept on your hips. You were rendered the smallest thing for him.
"Satoru," you moaned, mindlessly grabbing onto his shoulder blades.
"I know, sweetheart, I know." He kisses you, tenderly, heavily contrasting the savage speed of thrusts.
You whimpered into the lip lock. Your heels dug into the mattress and your toes curled from the intensity of the pleasure you felt. Your breathing became heavier but Satoru refused to unlink his lips from yours. He couldn't when the sounds you made tasted like heaven on his tongue. His own sounds mingled with yours, a harmony that let you know that you weren't the only one feeling good. He was rutting into you, a telltale sign that he was about to cum.
"Mmm..." he hums, before unlatching his lips from yours. He panted as he watched you unravel beneath him, the smallest pinch between your brows as you gushed on him again. The way your walls spasmed around him had him following right after, another load painting your walls.
He grinned at you devilishly, the expression followed by a bright and sunny, airy chuckle. He pulls out of you, and looks down to watch your combined fluids slowly ooze out of you.
"Damn, you really tried putting a baby in me." You sigh, heavily, immediately regaining his attention. "Why do we fuck like this every time?" You rub your eyes, your sleepiness coming back around.
"I'll get one in there someday." He rubs his palm over your stomach. "And also, it's always like that because I love the face you make when you cum and you love the process of giving me that sight." His eye conveyed a seductiveness to their expression that kept you in check.
Your face goes red, warm to the touch. "Shut up." You sit up and playfully shove him.
"I get to cover you in semipermanent kisses, too." His hand comes up to the side of your neck and his fingers trace the red smudges that will darken over time. You roll your eyes, yet still put your hand over his, bringing it to your lips to press a kiss to his knuckles.
"We should shower. It's almost five in the morning." You ignore the mischievous glint in his eyes and the way he's obviously trying to suppress a boyish grin.
"Carry me, please?"
Satoru chuckles, knowing exactly why you want him to carry you.
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hellfire--cult · 1 year
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Harrington!reader who struck up a friendship with Billy after finding him crying. It wasn’t long until she developed a crush on the older boy. But she knew she was the least attractive girl in school, and on the cheerleading squad. Every girl was all over him, she never thought he’d see her that way.
Movie Night
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I'm so sorry, I got carried away, and I made it super long, SO I HOPE YOU ENJOY AND I HOPE EVERYONE ELSE DOES this has: fluff, angst, mean brother persona on Steve's behalf, OOC Billy Hargrove, soft side.
wc: 8k (i got a lil inspired, no one requests Billy and I love to write him 😭)
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Stupid Steve. Stupid school. Stupid fucking stereotypes.
You understand, you get it, the fucking sister of Steve Harrington should be the perfect girl, perfect as her idiotic brother. If only they knew that being in every single sport isn’t what Steve wants, it isn’t what he desires, it isn’t what he always dreamed about. 
But it’s not that perfection they want from you, oh no. It’s not your fault you have bad eye sight so you have to wear glasses, and for some reason that made you fucking undesirable. Just because you are wearing glasses, and you’ve been wearing them ever since middle school, where there were minimum problems with it, and now in high school when you just want to be able to date someone, or even kiss, it’s almost impossible because of them.
So yes, you knew people didn’t want to be with you, and you knew that it was all because of the idealization of the Harrington girl not meeting their expectations. Jokes on them, every single fucking guy in school looks like stepped on shit.
When you finally got into freshmen year, you already knew Steve was the most popular guy in school, always boosting about it at the dinner table, father always saying how proud he is for Steve being the captain of almost every fucking imaginable sport. You looked up to Steve, you really did look up to your brother… Until you crossed those forsaken high school doors, and the only face your brother sent you was that of disgust and turned his back on you.
And that sets your fate.
Now as a Junior, your brother finally graduates this year. Ever since he started dating Nancy who is in the same year as you, he has relatively changed. At home, he now tries to invite you to hang with him at the mall, or tell you to have dinner together when your parents aren’t home… You declined his invitation every time. You prefer to eat dinner in your bed, alone, while he drives away to be with Nancy. Just you, your books, and some good music. You are fine. 
It doesn’t help the fact that you have just one friend at school, and she’s not even always with you because she is Nancy’s Best Friend. Barb was always nice to you, and it’s the only one you talked to in class, because then in cheerleading practice, which you had to enter because you needed extracurricular credit because your parents said so, you were given the cold shoulder by every teammate there. You didn’t participate in the cheers really, you just wear the uniform every now and then and pass them bottles of water.
You just have to survive one year, just one more year and you can go to college, probably start anew, meet people, meet someone. You fixed your glasses on the bridge of your nose as you took notes while sitting at the bleachers, hearing the squeak of the tennis shoes of all the boys in the basketball team just going around. You hear a thump, making your eyes look up to see your brother laying on the floor, making you frown.
Then it made sense, as Billy Hargrove smirked, helping your brother stand up again. 
You knew that he wanted to take Steve’s position as the most popular guy at school, getting prom king and all that shit. You have heard your brother complaining about him on the phone sometimes, maybe to Nancy or to one of his friends. From what you’ve seen, Billy looked like a tough and irritating guy, and there is no need for you to get close to him at all, and you really could care less about what he does to your brother.
And that is basically your everyday life. Invisible, and you’re fine with that.
You’re fine. 
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“Hey, can you believe that guy?” Your head snapped up to see your brother at your door, leaning against the frame with his arms crossed over his chest. You raised your eyebrow at him, looking back down at your book. “If he takes away my captainship in the team, I will– Dad will fucking cut my head off.” 
“That’s what you get for following his dreams from day one.” You mumble in a low tone, but he caught onto it, frowning at you.
“I have my own dreams. I don’t follow his.” You nodded at that while still not looking at him. You really could care two shits about all of this. 
“Maybe Nancy can help you with this kinda stuff. I'm busy.” You heard shuffling at the door and then a sigh. You heard steps and you raised your head to hear him slam his door shut, and you knew he was probably getting ready to go to a party or something because of the music he started playing on his radio. Not once you were invited to one of those, not even by your own brother. He had hosted parties before, and you were commanded to stay in your room all night. The only time you came out of your room was to the bathroom to pee, and even then you had to wait because people were always making out inside. 
You got up from bed, closed the biology book to then set it on your desk, looking over to your library of VHS’s tilting your head to check what to watch tonight. You picked Terms of Endearment and Sixteen Candles. Your collection was full of romance and dramatic movies because it’s just your favorite genre to watch. Same with your books, your favorite being Sense & Sensibility. 
Steve left after a few minutes, and you made your way down to start your Friday movie night, and tomorrow will be the same, next weekend too. You should get more movies, you are on a roll of rewatching stuff by now. But it was at this moment, when you put the cassette into your player, and you finally sat down and started watching Sixteen Candles that it all simply fell apart.
Your rough facade crumbles down as you see the romance of the characters on screen, the friendship that is displayed in these movies, late calls with friends, kicking your feet because the guy you liked kissed you, or even called you to spend time with you. You stare absentmindedly at the screen as you see the kissing scene finally happening and your fingertips brush over your lips, just softly, tracing the shape of them.
After a few hours Steve finally returns home, completely sober and cursing under his breath. He sees the light of the living room turned on and some blue light shining on. He walked inside to find you asleep on the couch with the TV still on. He sighed, walking over to turn it off but then his eyes looked at your form, making his face completely fall down.
He bent over your figure to see the dried tears on your cheeks, falling down onto the couch. He looked over to the coffee table to look at what you were watching, getting hold of the case. You watch the same movie every Friday night… And every Saturday night. He rubbed his mouth with a frown to his face as he looked back at your frame. And he always repeats the same action every Friday night and every Saturday night.
He stands up to grab the blanket that’s over the couch to put it over your body, and with tears in his eyes he bends over to press a soft kiss at the top of your head with a quiet whisper that he always repeats and that you never hear, not that you would believe him anyway.
“I’m sorry.”
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Monday came way faster than you expected, and the morning was even quicker. Your parents were still away on their business trip, but Steve and you knew they were just out on vacation by themselves. Why have children when you just push them aside? 
You take out the lunch bag with your sandwiches in it, and you walk out of the school doors and into the football field which was deserted because it was lunch time, so it always gave you the best opportunity to head behind the bleachers to have some peaceful time for yourself, and that was until you almost dropped your bag as you screamed and flinched when you saw someone already there who snapped his head back at you.
Billy Hargrove.
Your breathing was heavy and your eyes were still trying to focus from the scare but as soon as they did you realized that Billy’s eyes were filled with tears, one or two might have escaped because you could see the glistening trail that they left behind on his cheeks. You were trying to talk to him, but then his eyebrows furrowed together, a tight angry look on his face.
“The fuck you looking at Harrington?” You flinched back at that, annoyance switching inside of you instead of fear. This guy was crying and has the audacity to sound threatening?
“Oh, right, sorry, it’s just seeing Billy Hargrove actually having feelings is a sight.” His eyes snapped wide at your response, surprise crossing his features while he stared at you this time. “Who’s staring now?”
“Oh, right, sorry, it’s just that hearing you fucking talk for once is a sight.” You were taken aback by his response, mimicking yours. You sucked on your right cheek in annoyance as he wiped his cheeks away.
“Well, off you go.” He snaps his head at you, a frown on his features to then letting a smirk spread on his lips.
“I came here first. You go.” You scoff at that, shaking your head at him.
“No, I always come here at lunchtime, it’s my place.” 
“Well, that’s lonely as fuck.” You know that. You fucking know that, he doesn’t need to say it to your face, not the heartthrob of the school. Before your heart could turn in pain you nod at him.
“Fine, take it for today.” You turn to finally walk away. Maybe you can eat at the picnic table in the forest? But sometimes the stoner would go there to deal, and you weren’t judging Munson really, you gotta do what you gotta do to survive. 
“Wait.” You stopped on your tracks and slowly turned around to see Billy slumping down on the ground, his back resting against a column of the bleachers while he rested his forearms on his bent knees. “You can stay here if you don’t tell anyone you saw me like this.” 
Who would you even tell this to? He might be scared that you would tell Steve about it, but Billy seems to not know you don’t actually have a good relationship with your brother, and you have just one casual friend in this school. You look in between the bleachers and towards the woods and then you look back at Billy, giving a sigh and finally sitting down with your legs crossed. 
It was silent between you two, almost uncomfortable but not quite. You were eating your sandwich and you took out a bottle of water out of your bag too. You glanced once at him, and he was looking at the distance, just breathing slowly. You wanted to know what happened to him, because he didn’t seem like the guy that would cry easily. He looked at you, raising an eyebrow up at you.
“Why do you eat here?” He asks and you clear your throat, taking a sip of your water.
“Why were you crying?” 
“Touché.” You gave a nod in understanding. You weren’t going to talk to him if he wasn’t going to talk to you. You looked inside your bag to grab onto the other sandwich, and you handed it to him. He looked at it with a frown and then back at you.
“If you’re here it means you didn’t eat. Basketball players need food.” You calmly say to him and he looks down at the sandwich, taking it from your hands, and then taking a bite out of it, grimacing in disgust.
“What the fuck is in this?” He looks down into it and you smirk at him, finishing off your own.
“Mustard and pickle sandwich.”
He ate the sandwich anyway. It was nice to eat lunch with someone for once, even if that person was Billy Hargrove and it would be a one time thing in your life… Though, it wasn’t. Billy was back behind the bleachers almost everyday after that. He wasn’t at all that persona that he was with everyone else with you. The cocky insufferable bastard you knew was all a mask, and you could see it when he told you about how Tammy Thompson tried to hide a fart with her cough in class.
“You’re fucking kidding…” You were giggling, covering your mouth as you both sat in front of one another, and the closeness slowly shrinking as two weeks went by of eating lunch with him.
“I am not, she actually thought it was discreet, but I heard it. Not that I said anything about it, but it was a total boner killer.” You raised an eyebrow at that, swallowing your apple that you were having as dessert.
“What, girls can’t fart Hargrove?” He rolls his eyes at you and then raises his hand to flick your forehead, making you wince and rub the skin he left in a red state.
“I didn’t say that. When you trust someone enough to do it in their face, sure. Not in the middle of class, and much less when you are a chair in front of mine.” At that you let out a laugh, throwing your head back. He chuckled and took a swig of his cigarette, blowing the smoke to the side so it wouldn’t hit your face.
“God, I really don’t pay attention to shit like that.” You took another bite of your apple and Billy was still looking at you, clearing his throat, making you look up at him.
“What do you do on Friday nights? I mean, your brother is at every single party but you are nowhere to be found.” He asks you and you feel your cheeks flush slightly at that. You look down at your apple and swallow your bite.
“I often watch movies. Have my own movie nights, sometimes with popcorn, and if I am feeling fancy, S’mores.” You gave him a small smile as you took another sip of water but Billy was still looking at you with a frown to his eyebrows.
“By yourself?” And you suddenly felt embarrassment washing over you. How pathetic were you? He is a guy that has every student in this school eating at the palm of his hand, plans of going out somewhere almost everyday, a date every single night, and you just watched movies and read books for company.
“I– I have to go.” You suddenly blurt out, standing up abruptly to then wipe your jeans from the dirt of the floor. Billy was following suit, doing the same thing, and about to stop you, but you were already walking away. You didn’t need the reminder of how stupid all of your life sounded. You didn’t need it from him. You were always reminded of it by your father, saying that you should be more like his son. Your mother says that at her age she already dated someone and had tons of friends. Steve showing off his new relationship and friends to you, keeping you in the shadows from everyone.
You didn’t need more reminders.
So when you got home, and realized Steve was already out of sight, probably at Heather’s party, you took your time to shower, put on some comfy sweatpants, a white t-shirt and a gray hoodie, and you grabbed your movies and went downstairs. Maybe they will cheer you up from all the stuff that has happened with Billy today. It’s stupid, you both don’t talk to each other all day, yet at lunch you just talk non-stop.
Sweet popcorn was today’s choice and you were already salivating at the smell of it all. Once it was done you put it in a bowl and headed over to the living room, turning the TV on, and putting Pretty in Pink in your VHS. Steve must be getting drunk with his friends by now, dancing to Roxette or something like that. You popped a single popcorn in your mouth and you were about to press play but you were interrupted when glass knocking was heard from the sliding door to the garden.
You jumped up in fear, eyes widened as you quickly turned your head and saw Billy fucking Hargrove outside the doors. You blinked once, twice, three times. Wasn’t he at Heather’s party too? You stood up from your seat, blushing at your attire but he already saw you in it, no time to actually go change. You fixed your glasses at the bridge of your nose as you walked towards the doors to finally unlock them and open a side for him.
“What the fuck are you doing here Billy!” You almost screamed at him, but he raised his hands up in a surrender mode and chuckled at you.
“By that yelling I am assuming your parents are still gone. Let me in, I’m fucking freezing.” He walks past you and you scoff at the nerve of this man. You close the door and you see him looking around with his hands inside his black leather jacket. Your eyes trailed downwards for a second, taking in how tight his pants were, but you snapped out of it, walking around him so that you were facing him.
“What are you doing here?” You ask again and he simply shrugs, still looking all around your house. 
“Party was lame as shit, and you said there was a movie night here tonight. That seemed far more interesting than Tommy trying to do a keg stand and falling onto it, breaking his nose.” He walks to the couch, sitting down on it and he immediately grabs the bowl of popcorn from the coffee table. Your mouth hangs open again at this, going to the couch and sitting down next to him.
“You– I don’t need your pity.” You say to him, looking down at your hands as you played with the hem of the sleeves of your hoodie. He chuckles at that and shakes his head.
“Sweetheart, I don’t pity anyone. The party was really fucking boring.” He takes a popcorn in his mouth and he hums at the sweetness. You raise an eyebrow to look at him. You never thought Billy Hargrove would be on the sweet side of stuff. “So, what are we watching?”
A smirk formed on your lips. He was gonna fucking hate it, that’s what he gets for barging in your house.
Yet–
“I fucking hated Duckie.” You were wide eyed at him. He had paid complete attention to the movie, even giving small commentary that he really liked the fact that the girl stood up for herself. He turns to look at you, a frown coming to his eyebrows. “What?” 
“I just… I didn’t think you like this genre of movies.” You reply to him, a little bit nervous for some reason and he smiles at you and then looks back at the screen.
“I never watched one of these. They have a lot of plot, and they’re interesting.” Your eyes sparkled in excitement and you grabbed his shoulder, which made him look at you alarmingly.
“You’re in for a ride.”
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Billy came back again the next day, taking the chance that Steve was out at Nancy’s for the night. He then sneaked into your room while Steve slept and you played Grease on your small TV and VHS that were on top of your dresser. He actually enjoyed it, but despised it because it was a musical. The next time, he actually came through the front door, and you both finally watched Sixteen Candles together. Now, Saturday Night, Steve was at Nancy’s for a family dinner and Billy was taking out two beers from the six pack he came with.
“I don’t drink…” You say to him and he raises an eyebrow up at you. 
“Daily or weekly, but you have tried alcohol. One beer is not going to kill you Sweetheart.” You nodded at that and you grabbed onto the can, sitting back down on the couch. You opened it as Billy walked towards you and plopped down with a huff, already taking a swig out of his can. You grimaced at yours and you took a tentative sip, lowering the can to look at him, completely disgusted by the taste and he simply threw his head back in laughter.
“Disgusting.” You say to him and he shrugs at you, sending a smile your way.
“It’s an acquired taste baby, you just keep drinking it, if you feel fuzzy you can leave it.” You felt your heart accelerate at him, feeling the butterflies exploding in your stomach. You didn’t know when your relationship with Billy took a turn for the better, but he actually sends a smile your way this time when walking down the halls, he sometimes greets you when you pass by him in the hallways, like he is not making it seem like he doesn’t know you.
So it was hard not to fall for him. It was undeniable at this point, and even if he was strong and mean, and an ultimate bully to everyone else, he comes here to your house, watches romantic comedies with you, eats popcorn with you, and you two talk about nonsense all evening. Nobody knows about this, and you’re happy to have this secret between the two of you. You can live in the fantasy a little bit longer.
“What did you bring?” You look at the cassette he got and you look at the front of it. You grimaced again and showed it to him. “The terminator?” 
“Classic sweetheart, it’s an action movie, you gotta expand your movie knowledge a bit.” You didn’t want to complain, it was the first time Billy suggested to watch something he likes, and in reality you were interested in knowing it, and hopefully like it the way he does.
News flash, you didn’t like it.
“Why are there so many guns?! It's unnecessary!” You complain, your beer gone and you do feel a little fuzzy but not too much. You just felt giddy. He laughed at your side and shook his head as he drank his second can.
“That’s what action movies are, baby, they are irrational, little to nothing of plot, and shooting everywhere.” He says and you sigh at that, shaking your head. The room filled with silence as Billy looked forward, his smile slowly disappearing. “You know why I come here often?”
You straightened at that, blinked with confusion as you turned to look at him. You frowned when you saw how serious he got, just out of nowhere, and your belly turned for him, not in a romantic way, but more of a worry kind of nervousness. 
“Because parties now bore you?” You ask him and he gives you one chuckle and then shakes his head, resting it on the backrest of the couch, looking at the ceiling.
“You help me distract myself.” He took a deep breath in as you kept looking at him and you knew it was something he was having a hard time talking about. “The day you saw me crying… I was actually afraid.” 
“What?”
“My father… Let’s just say he has– a rough hand. Any slip up I make, I just get a punch out of it… I’m just so angry all the time, so unlike my fucking self and who I actually am when I am at school. I just let out my anger towards people, because I cannot take it out on my own father.” You could see his Adam's apple bobbing up and down, and you knew he was trying to choke back tears as he talked. Your heart just knotted at seeing him like this, feeling helpless, not knowing what to actually tell him.
“Billy–”
“And you… I tried to be mean to you… And you actually had the guts that no one had at this school yet. Talk back to me.” His head turned to finally look at you again and your eyes burned at his confession. “I couldn’t be mean to you… With you I can— I can be calm, watch a movie, talk about how creepy that Creel house is and how we should sabotage it– I mean, the only thing I talk with the people from school? Chicks, sex, cars, alcohol.” 
You couldn’t help the small smile that appeared on your lips, turning your whole body to face him, your legs coming to rest on top of the couch too, bending them and resting your side on the backrest. 
“Well, I am glad I could help in some way… My house is always open for you Billy.” His eyes were just staring into yours now, the only thing being heard in the room were your breaths, until he finally talked.
“Can I kiss you?” 
What?
There is no possible way you heard that from him. This is a dream, it has to be a dream. There is no way Billy Hargrove, your now friend, your crush, the guy you like has asked to actually kiss you. This only happens in movies, in books, and it never happens in real life, at least, not to you. 
“W-Why would you want to kiss me?” And Billy’s features turned into saddened ones at your words. Don’t you realize how beautiful you are? He straightened up on the couch, his body turning to face you as well as both of your hearts jumped out of your chest.
“Why wouldn’t I want to kiss you?” was his short answer. Your belly turned in pure nervousness now as your body grew a cold sweat. You never kissed anyone, and Billy seemed to know how to do it, and you were just too inexperienced. A flush came over all of your body as you fixed the glasses on the bridge of your nose and you looked down to avoid his gaze.
“I– I never–” You gulped, not being able to finish the phrase from how stupid it sounded. A warm hand was pressed on your cheek, making you lift your head up to look at him again, and you didn’t realize how close he got to you, his blue eyes staring into yours.
“I ask you again… Can I kiss you?” And you finally give him a nod. You weren’t going to miss this chance, not for one second. He still wants to kiss you despite you not knowing what you were getting yourself into. He smiled at you and grabbed onto your glasses, pulling them off your face and setting them on the coffee table. “They were just going to get in the way.” 
You took a shaky breath in, his hand still on your cheek as he slowly leaned down towards you. You closed your eyes and his remained open to remember your features as he finally does what he has been wanting to do for the past weeks. At first it was a simple attraction of course, but he knew it was more than that, and he was scared as shit about it… But he never wanted someone as much as he’s been wanting you.
His lips connected with yours in a soft peck, brief, and you let a breath go out of your lips, only for another peck to land. Then another, then another that lingered there a bit more, and then the next one he just stayed there, and suddenly started moving his lips, guiding you as your heartbeat made you deaf in your ears. How do people do this and not faint at the spot?
The lip smacking was heard in the room as your hands finally were brave enough to travel, one scanning his bicep, the other one moving towards the back of his neck, feeling his skin under your fingertips. His free hand landed on your waist, not pressing too hard so that you know that he is being mindful of you. At this point, Billy would already be inside someone, satisfying his needs, but with you… He wasn’t going to do that, at least not now, not yet, and that is if you let him. 
He wants to take care of you.
He pulled away for a second, his lips touching yours still as your breathing mixed with one another’s in soft pants. You were feeling as if you were burning all over, not knowing what was happening with you. You never felt like this before, and maybe it has to do with the fact that not only was Billy good looking, but you also feel more than just friendship for him.
“You okay?” You nod frantically at him, wanting more, giving him a peck on the lips making him chuckle in a low tone. “Sorry baby, but I need more.” 
He suddenly pushed you back on the couch, crawling over you and you didn’t even think, you just wrapped your arms around his shoulders, and he kept his bottom half away from yours, even if it pained him on his thighs from the strength he was doing to keep himself up. His lips connected with yours again, rougher this time, more desperate, the kiss suddenly turning into a very heated one as he suddenly licks your bottom lip a few times.
The butterflies in your belly explode as you open your mouth and his tongue finally slides in. You gasp at the feeling, your hands finding his biceps through his blouse, and you felt his chain hitting your neck at every movement. One hand was still gripping on your waist, while the other remained at your nape, pulling you deeper into the kiss. 
You really can’t believe this is happening, not to you, not with Billy, it doesn’t make sense that he looked your way, it doesn’t make sense that he actually wants to kiss you, not when he has Heather on his tail all the time, or Carol even if she is dating Tommy. Or Janet. You always hear them talking about him in the bathroom, always planning their move on him, and this feels you with a sense of power, with a sense of accomplishment and pride in yourself. 
Your hands ran through his hair and he groaned into the kiss, and that ignited so many things inside of you that you never felt in your life, and you wanted to hear more of it. Billy was trying his best to keep himself in a hovering position with you, but he was finding it harder and harder to do so. He can’t go on, at least not today when it was your first kiss. He didn’t want to scare you, even if your urges were the same as his, because he could feel your need to pull him even closer.
The door suddenly clicked and both of your eyes snapped wide open, pulling away, looking at one another, panting heavily. Best scenario, it's your parents, and they would be thrilled that you actually, and finally, have someone over at your house… Now, worst case scenario–
“What the ACTUAL FUCK?!” You both sat up on the couch to look over at Steve, who was standing there in the living room, wide eyed, and his face reddened bit by bit. Shit.
“Steve–” You started talking but he raised his hand at you, to then point a finger at Billy.
“Get the fuck off my sister.” You wanted to roll your eyes at this, because why is he acting all protective now? You finally got some action in your fucking life and he wants to take it away from you.
“I don’t think she wants me to leave.” Billy dares to say, glaring at your brother who took a look at the coffee table, seeing the cans of beer. His mind started racing, and Billy followed his gaze, his mouth opening to talk but Steve was running up the stairs already. Your eyes widened and you pushed Billy off, standing up quickly and urging him to do the same.
“You have to leave!” You were trying to push Billy towards the front door but his feet were still planted against the floor with a frown to his face, and your head snapped to the stairs to see Steve running back down with his baseball bat in his hands. Billy’s eyes widen when Steve starts to approach him with a swinging motion.
“Taking fucking advantage of my sister is something I won’t take from you Hargrove, so get the fuck out of my house before I crush your skull in!” 
“Shit, Harrington– Fucking listen for a second–” Steve’s baseball bat hits the backrest of the couch, and you could see the dent of the wooden under it that he created. Billy ripped himself off you and gave you a look as if asking if you were okay.
“I’ll talk to him, you go.” You tell him and he gulps, looking back at Steve with a threatening look on his face which Steve only scoffed at.
“I’ll talk to you later.” Billy says with a small squeeze to your hand as he walks out of the house, passing by Steve. Your brother follows him to the front door and he doesn’t walk back inside until Billy drives away with his Camaro. After the roaring engine can be heard in the distance, Steve slams the door shut, throwing the bat at the floor and stomping back into the living room where you were standing there with a glare on your eyes as if you were about to kill him.
“When I saw his fucking car out in front of the house I thought it was a stupid coincidence, and I come in here to see you about to have sex with the sluttiest man in the goddamn school! What are you thinking!?” You frown in anger at that, stepping towards him.
“I am his friend! I wasn’t going to have sex with him, and he wasn’t taking fucking advantage of me! I drank ONE beer, ONE!” You yell back at him and he fake laughs as he runs his hand over his face.
“The first time you have a guy in this house, and it is Billy FUCKING Hargrove. The one guy that I am fighting with for Captain at our basketball team, the one guy that gives me the hardest fucking time of my life at the moment, and you want me to just accept that he wants to be with you because he WANTS TO?” Your chest hurt at those words, your own coming out in soft stutters at Steve’s blind rage.
“He even asked me if I wanted to, and I said yes–”
“God, you cannot be this fucking stupid! He hates me, makes my life a living hell, and you seriously think that he is a nice guy!? You really think there is no ulterior motive!?” He yelled at you and his words were stabbing you in every part of your body, your head already spinning from how harsh he was being with you.
“Why? Is it impossible that he actually wants to be with me?” You try to say loudly at him, even if your fingers start to feel numb. He scoffed at that, looking at you.
“Yes, and I don’t think you are dumb enough to not see that.” He was referring to so many other things, and it was regarding Billy’s persona, in Billy’s actions, in his rivalry with him… And when he saw your tear rolling down your face, his anger evaporated as if water was being thrown at him.
“Okay…” Was your defeated response. You turned around to retrieve your glasses from your coffee table and Steve winced, clenching his eyes tightly together as pain rushed through his body. 
“That wasn’t what I meant– Hey, listen to me, I really didn’t mean it to sound like that–” But you weren’t listening, putting the cassettes back into their cases and turning off the TV. You grabbed them and walked past him, going up into your room. Steve stood there, knowing he hurt you once again, not knowing what to do but run a hand through his hair, cursing under his breath as he started pacing back and forth.
He didn’t mean it to sound like no guy would want you, he didn’t mean it at all like that, yet the words coming out of his mouth betrayed him, completely. He doesn’t know how to make it up to you, because if he had given you the chance to go to the parties with him when you asked in your freshman year, many times, and told you yes instead of no, you would have more experiences, you might even have friends. If only he had let you come out of your room at his own parties when you asked him, almost begged him to let you participate, but he declined each time. Then in your sophomore year, you didn’t ask anymore, just accepted that he wasn’t going to tell you anymore about them, and you automatically locked the door whenever he hosted a party. 
This year, he tried to invite you, many times. You always declined. You didn’t even want to eat dinner with him, and he knows you want to leave the house as soon as possible thanks to him. Even with your parents. For the past two years he had been so blind because of his father’s approval and the one of all the students in Hawkins High that he didn’t notice how your parents didn’t ask you stuff at dinner. All questions were always directed to him. He noticed this year, and he tried to tell them you had nailed your exams, and the only thing you got from your father was ‘As she should.’
He was the cause of who you were now. Not at all the bubbly and animated girl that asked him to raise her up like an airplane in their backyard, not at all the small girl that put makeup on him pretending she was a stylist, not at all the middle school girl that got excited to see him whenever she got home from school to tell him about what she learned that day. 
He walked up the stairs and raised his hand to knock on your door, only to hear soft sobs on the other side, muffled. He wonders if you had also cried when he denied you all those times. He doesn’t know how to even make it up to you. He doesn’t know if he even can. 
So the next day, when you didn’t come out of your room, he let you have your alone time. Now on Monday he tried knocking on your door, only to receive the notice that you felt sick. He tried walking in but your door was completely locked. His eyebrows twitched and his mind had come up with a plan. A plan he will terribly hate. A plan that might end up badly for him. But it’s what he deserves for what he did to you. 
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Billy looked everywhere for you, and even asked Barbara Holland where you could be. She told him that she hadn’t seen her at Science that day either, so his best guess was that you had skipped school. His jaw clenched when he asked other people about you and some of them didn’t even know what you looked like. He waited for the bell to ring, and he was going to tumble Steve down if he had to in order to see you. He didn’t care.
But when he walked out of the school doors to rush to his Camaro, he was surprised to see Steve Harrington sitting on his trunk with his arms crossed. Billy’s eyes hardened at the sight, walking towards him, tilting his head in question at the brown haired boy who was looking at Billy with a mix of emotions behind his eyes.
“Harrington. Get off my fucking car.” He says and Steve gulps as he looks to the side.
“I fucked up.” At that Billy’s eyebrows turned into a frown, but his fists started clenching as Steve kept talking, telling him everything, everything he did to you, and what he had said to you that night when Billy left. 
While this was happening, you were combing your hair after the shower you took while sitting on your bed. You had taken a shower because you were greasy from yesterday already, and you really didn't want to get up, but you didn’t have a choice. Ever since Steve said that, you didn’t have the guts to actually call Billy because at some far away place in your mind, it made sense. 
You were invisible, and suddenly you were noticed? It doesn’t sound real. 
So maybe it wasn’t. Maybe it really was to get into your pants to mess with your brother, and that was honestly the most reasonable explanation for it. You frowned when you heard the door open downstairs, your door was left open so you could hear some drawers being open, to then hear steps coming up the stairs. Your eyes widened when you saw Steve slamming himself against the door frame of your room.
His eye was completely inflamed from a punch received to the face, his nose was bleeding and he was holding some ice covered in a rug to soak the blood in it. From what you could see, his lip was busted as well and his breathing was coming out of his mouth, almost in a pant.
“Steve, what happened?” Even in your hatred for him, seeing him this way made your heart fill with worry, pushing all of the other feelings aside. You were about to rise from the bed until Steve raised his hand up at you.
“I deserved it.” He looked towards the hallway and your eyes widened when you saw Billy coming into view, a pack of frozen peas on his right hand, his eyes glaring at Steve as he passed by him and into your room. His eyes turned to yours and you couldn’t help but look up at him, completely stunned. Steve groans and closes the door for you two as he heads downstairs. 
“What… Did you…?” You stutter as you sit back on your bed, seeing Billy’s injured hand as he sat on your bed too, nodding as he looked at you.
“I sure as hell did. Fucker deserved it. He told me everything, from the very beginning, and also what he said to you on Saturday night right after I left.” You feel your face flush with embarrassment and you look down at your hands again. You are not understanding what is going on, nor why Steve would go and tell your life story to Billy. “Though I have to say… Your brother does care for you.” You scoff at that.
“Right. Like he cared for me the past two years.” You reply with venom in your voice and you feel Billy scoot closer to you.
“He knows. He knows what he did to you. Your freshman year was the punch on the eye, your sophomore year was on his lip… And what he said on Saturday was the one on the nose.” He lets out a chuckle and you feel mixed emotions to that. You were happy that he defended your honor, but Steve was still your brother and you didn’t want physical harm to come to him.
“Don’t punch him again… Please.” You slowly looked up at Billy and his blue eyes were already looking at you. Your heart rate picked up the longer he stared at you.
“Do you really believe what he said to you that night?” He asks you, a small worried tone behind his voice. You feel yourself gulp and you look away in embarrassment or nervousness, you no longer know.
“I– After years of feeling this way, it was a very possible scenario.” You say to him in a low voice, your fingers playing with each other. You see him put the bag of peas away, and his hands look for yours. You look down to see his right hand completely bruised up, some skin completely chipped off on his knuckles. You gasp at that and his hold gets stronger on you, making you look up at him. He was closer now, making your breathing get stuck in your throat. 
“How can I prove to you that I want you? How can I prove to you that I like you, that I like you very much that I drive myself insane with this fucking feeling, because god knows I am not good with relationships…” For the first time you see a blush come to his cheeks, and his gaze looks down at your connected hands, like how you do when you get nervous. “But I wanna try that with you.” 
Your heart leapt out of your mouth almost, not truly believing what was happening, but the bruised knuckles made it more real, the blush on his cheeks made you realize it was no dream at all. This man in front of you wants you, despite it all, and you both have so many broken pieces to pick up inside one another, but you figure that you can help each other. You can mend his heart back, as he can mend yours.
“I think… The first step would be a date…” You say to him almost in a whisper and he chuckles as he looks up at you. He squints slightly at that as if in thought as your smile grows on your face while looking at him.
“I have an idea for it. I think they are showcasing the new Rambo movie.” He says to you with a smirk to his face and your mouth fell open at that, shaking your head.
“I am not watching an action movie on our first date!” He chuckles at that, his face coming closer to yours slowly, and you feel magnetized to him as you both leaned into one another. 
“Oh, I bet you prefer the one where the bad boy goes for the intelligent and perfect girl, that genre, right?” You squint at him, pretending to be offended by his words.
“Don’t act like you don’t like those movies Hargrove.” At that he chuckles, his left hand snaking to the back of your neck to pull you closer to him, a soft breath hitting your lips as he talks.
“I might have a thing for romance.” His lips touched yours again, and you smiled through the kiss, your own hands resting on the back of his head to pull him deeper into the kiss, to taste him even better. Your lips moved along with his, taking in eachother’s breaths, bodies coming closer at each second.
“Don’t fuck my sister, I draw the line there. Not today, not with me here.” You both heard Steve’s voice behind the door, making Billy groan in annoyance and pull away from you to glare at the door as the steps could be heard and another door closes down the hallway.
“I am punching him again.” Billy says and you were glaring at the door too.
“My turn.”
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A/N: Well shit, I hope you enjoyed. IT TURNED OUT TO BE A ONE SHOT.
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